Post/Author/DateTime	Post
monkofcuthbert4684 01-16-07, 06:33 PM	I play monks, and our group could really stand some more laughter. Any good one liners?
Lyinginbedmon 01-16-07, 07:25 PM	See also: Bruce Lee (http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Bruce_Lee), Jackie Chan (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jackie_Chan), or Jet Li (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jet_Li). Most notably, the first one, "Be water, my friend" certainly sounds like a good D&D Monk's catchphrase
BlackZed 01-16-07, 07:28 PM	Things like that are usually better coming straight off the cuff rather than off of some mental (or worse, written) list. It can come off as contrived. However, for my two cents, I'm going to steal an idea from Terry Pratchett. Make up absurd fighting style names. Like oki-doki, upsi-daizi, and no-kandu. Fit them into conversation however you like.
Adolph_Kheebler 01-17-07, 10:05 AM	Yeah. Do absurd fighting names. Also do alot of the nature zen stuff (the strength of the tiger is in me) but make it wierd and worse. I suggest something like "I fight with the strength of a vole, the reflexes of a crab, and the cunning of a turkey. You cannot defeat me." When you want to use an animal metaphor, dont' think of a good animal, just use the first animal you think of in any situation. Hilarity will ensue.
Adrian_Crane 01-17-07, 12:40 PM	My personal favorite is from The Matrix videogame. If someone asks you about your strict lifestyle... "Celibacy is a hands-on job." Nobody says monks can't have a sense of humor ;)
JhyarelleNightwind 01-17-07, 01:55 PM	Guys how could you possibly miss this one. "Boot to the head!" Google "Boot to the Head" or Tae-Kwon-Leep if you don't get the reference. Here's few more. "Who disturbs our meditation as a pebble disturbs a pond?" "Tae-Kwon-Leep is not a path to a door, but a road leading forever towards the horizon." "Tae-Kwon Leep is the wine of purity, not the vinigar of hostility. Meditate on this truth with us." "You fail to grasp Tae-Kwon Leep. Approach me so that you may see." "You are lucky. Few novices experiece so much of Tae-Kwon Leep so soon." "I have learned two things. First, that anger is a weapon only to ones oppenent and get in the first shot. Boot to the head!" Master: Can anyone tell us what lesson has been learned here? Student: Uh, yes master, not a single one of could defeat you. Master: You gain wisdom child. Student: So we'll have to gang up on you! Get him now! Master: (multiple Boots to many heads) "Let us rejoin the mind to the body, and gaze into the heart of the candle in meditation."
kaoswarrior 01-18-07, 11:03 PM	Depends on the situation... Flurry of blows "A hundred strikes are wasted where one will do, but where one may do a hundred can make for quite a workout" "My hands are not the weapons you should fear, for they are but an extension of my arms and my body" "Hmm, most distressing... I was hoping you would try blocking some of those strikes" Quivering Palm "I suggest you surrender... before I let you die" Flying Kick "Your fate will crash over you even as my foot stikes" Ki Strike "My Yin and Yang form into my blows and war with your inbalance - it is not the pain of my attack that cripples you, it is your own inability to attain perfection" Various things like that... look on it as teaching your opponents.
aikimiller 01-18-07, 11:28 PM	The classic, deadpanned keanu reaves "I know Kung Fu" us usaully good for a couple laughs.
Karish 01-19-07, 09:03 PM	"Its over nine thousaaaaaaaaaaaaaand!" Angry monk who realizes his opponent is really strong.
Nessaj 01-21-07, 10:05 AM	"Its over nine thousaaaaaaaaaaaaaand!" :rofl: Zen sayings that make no sense are a personal favorite...Even better if you can back them up later. "The wise squirrel does not gather his nuts in the winter." Rest of party: What?? Points behind the group. "Aren't we supposed to be covering our tracks? Someone could follow us back..." Just make sure you mix them up with completely random stuff, and just shaek your head and say you told them so when bad stuff eventually happens. "The brown bear always licks himself twice before hunting for salmon." :rolleyes: If you can get your party to start licking themselves in various places, you're golden.
Nived 01-22-07, 01:17 AM	One of my favorite lines from a monk character (in Tales from the Last War anthology) went something like this. Having a conversation with a sargent. "Excuse me I must train." "You're still in training?" "Of course, aren't you?" "Listen boy I've been in this army for 15 years, and fought more battles than you're ever likely to see." "That's sad, there's nothing left for you to do but to die." or something like that. Random note... I also find that convient to explain why some war vets never make it above 2nd level warrior after years of service while PC can advance wildly in months. Some people refuse to learn.
Jedipilot24 02-11-07, 11:24 AM	After being annoyed "Don't make me Stun you." (Actually happened once to the Halfling who nearly died as a result.)
Grognor 02-11-07, 01:38 PM	Toss in some "great sage" quotes, like: Confucious say, "Man who dines on knucle sandwich will be floored by taste."
Mandras 02-11-07, 04:22 PM	To the worthy opponent You should say something like - "Your tiger style is strong but my dragon style is stronger". Make sure You move your lips more than you say syllables. Best is to keep you empty lips moving for a second after You end the phrase, as they did in those 1960-70s kung-fu movis where the translations were badly-synchronized :) Works like a charm. Best Regards, Mandras
Pajaul 02-11-07, 06:04 PM	Step 1: Get Versatile Unarmed Strike. Step 2: Hilarity Ensues. If challenged to a duel (preferably with rapiers): Put down your sword. Hold up one finger. Proceed to poke them to death. “Now that, is a touch attack.” If asked to get fire wood: (Hopefully a dwarf): “You can use my Axe.” Monk: “No thank you, I have a hand axe.” Then chop some wood with your hand. Beware for this may backfire and people will then be telling you to “Chop to it.” Random quotes: “My toes are piercing weapons.” “I can kill you with Rock, Paper, Scissors.” “Don’t make me slash you with my Butt.” Quotes independent on Versatile Unarmed strike include various play on words that indicate a mystic school of martial arts that only really amount to violence. Such as: “I am well trained in the art of Beetu Tudeth.” “You style is strong but I know Whup Asth! “It is an ancient secret passed down through generations. It is called, kick-in-the-teeth.” “A wise man once said, A sleeping Dragon lay in rest be as the silent wind… or it will eat you.” And other various splays on wise and mystic sayings or pearls of wisdom which you seemingly are about to pass down and just turn out to be common sense. Have fun!
Tjuk 02-12-07, 04:42 AM	Or just as you go through the game, act like your a janitor, cleaning, wheeping all the time, that's what i did :) untill my mates got annoyed by having someone that constantly cleans everything behind them, even when they are trying to do a robbery... and i come in and start cleaning the shop instead of stealing stuff. :)
mato_hibiki 02-12-07, 08:44 PM	If I recall there's a feat calling flying kick, no? Call it 'kick you in the face attack'. And, also, and most importantly, you are a master of Deja Fu. "Deja Fu?" "Yes, the feeling that I've kicked your ass before." Best used against someone you've fought, and beaten before.