Background critique needed please :) [Archive] - Wizards Community

Background critique needed please :) [Archive] - Wizards Community

Post/Author/DateTime Post
CobaltDeathWolf
07-30-07, 01:35 PM Ntuka is a very strange person to say the least. Although he is quite a skilled magus, he would much rather tell stories around a campfire or in a tavern. He can be rather lethargic and he daydreams almost all the time. In the presence of more dedicated (and apparently less skilled) individuals he would most likely take the role of sidekick. Why he does this, no one can say. What can be said is that if necessary, he will rise to the occasion. He isn’t a very large man, a little over five feet tall. But he is very lithe. He wins most of his battles thanks to his dexterity, and magical abilities.
He had a typical childhood (well, typical for a gypsy at least). He spent his time listening to stories that his “grams” told, gathering food, and helping to prepare for “Yel-Dorae”. This is what his particular family calls the annual hunt for werewolves and other lycanthropes. He never truly understood it. He’s a lycanthrope himself, so he often wonders why they don’t treat him the same way. He asked his mother about this many times. The only answer she ever gave was “Hmph, you can ask your father… if he ever returns.” He never knew his father. His mother often says this was for the best, since his father was a werewolf. He was by no means evil, but his tribe has a great hatred for lycanthropes for some reason.
His mother was horribly injured while she was pregnant with him. She needed to undergo a very… unnatural procedure. She needed chaos surgery to live. This had an unforeseeable affect on Ntuka. He was born a mutant. The family did not shun him; they treated him as they would any other child, though they did tread lightly when they were around him. With so many strange and unnatural events involved in his birth, they wondered just how human he was. His third eye was what disturbed them the most. To fix this, his mother told him to where a head band at all times. He didn’t mind though, since it belonged to his father, he saw it as an honor. He also seemed to age slower than the children born around the same time as him. This greatly disturbed the elders; at one point they tried to perform an exorcism when he was a toddler. All Ntuka did was smile and clap his hands.
As time went on, Ntuka found that he had a talent for magic. He could perform the most basic spells at will, even when the tribe’s most powerful magi could only use theirs a few times a day. His mother just happened to be adept at the art of summoning. She attempted to train him. But this did not work out too well. He always became distracted by a butterfly, his own magic, or something else his found interesting instead of paying attention to his mother. Apparently, all of this daydreaming is how he learns his spells. He doesn’t learn magic by studying it, but by understanding its true nature. Instead of forcing her method on him, she simply let him wander about and discover his abilities for himself. Ntuka asked his mother many times if she would train him in the art of summoning. She said no every time. She did not believe he possessed the discipline to become a summoner. He still doesn’t think this is very fair.
Soon Ntuka decided to leave. His mother was very sad to see him go, though the rest of the tribe had mixed feelings of sadness and relief. Life was not as hard for him as the elders believed it would be. He was able to make plenty of money with fortune telling, dancing, and singing. He even devised a little contest. He would challenge a spell-caster to use their strongest spell against him; if he survived he would win their money. Obviously he’s never lost. At present, Ntuka is about 20 years old, but his mutation causes him to look only fifteen. He has short, black hair. His eyes seem to shift in color from a deep sapphire, to vibrant silver. He has lupine features (slightly elongated face, very pronounced canines, sharp ears, etc.), suggesting he’s less human than he appears. He is mildly attractive, although there seems to be an aura of… wrongness surrounding him at all times. He wears a blue head band that he never seems to take off. When asked about it, he simply responds with a raspberry. He is currently imprisoned. Why? He doesn’t know. Nor does he seem to care too much. He will soon be forced to fight for his freedom in a gladiatorial arena.

ammendnments made!
(and i thought that natural lycans only had a damage reduction of 10)
Morka
07-30-07, 02:57 PM What is your character exactly? A high-dexterity swashbuckler bard? A savage werewolf? A spellfire user?

What does he look like? Is it apparent that he is a lycanthrope?

I'm not sure why you plogged "Chaos Surgery" in your background... Is it to explain his lycanthropy? What about simply telling his father was a werewolf? That could explain while the rest of the gypsie tribe hates lycanthropes...

Why did he quit his familly? You could perhaps hint that he was more and more disliked due to his lycanthropic nature. Your mother could love you inconditionally, but the rest of the tribe could come to dislike you, even hating you. Especially if you did a bad, bad thing under the last full moon... After all, there should be a reason why the tribe hates lycanthropes...

Lycanthropy could also explain why you're in jail. You could have done another bad, bad thing under the last full moon, but you can't remember what it was...

Oh, one last thing: the whole story about challenging spellcasters and always winning is a bit arrogant, if not dangerous... After all, sooner or later, you might find you facing an epic necromancer who just looks like the next wandering sorcerer...
But since you are a lycanthrope, with potentially DR 15/Silver, you could challenge fighter to strike you with their weapons, but just after making sure the warrior doesn't have any silver weapon!
CobaltDeathWolf
07-30-07, 03:06 PM dangit!!! i didnt realize i left so many holes in the story!!! looks like i got some work to do.:embarrass

thanks for the help morca, i'll get right on it.:D

(and about the contest thing, i thought that was alright, since for all intents and purposes, epic spells are classified as 10th level spells. can he not absorb them since they're so powerful?:confused: )
Fithero
07-31-07, 08:59 AM I think it has the basis to be a pretty damn interesting character, just need to drop a few more details in. (ie... just what the hell he is :P)

A swashbuckling, spellfire wielding qypsy werewolf.... cool :D

Peace
Morka
07-31-07, 10:23 AM (and about the contest thing, i thought that was alright, since for all intents and purposes, epic spells are classified as 10th level spells. can he not absorb them since they're so powerful?:confused: )

I guess this issue comes from my lack of knowledge about spellfire wielding. I don't know anything about these rules. But for if you're 100% sure he can safely absorb any spell, go ahead! :cool:
CobaltDeathWolf
07-31-07, 06:46 PM :bump:
post edit bump:D

Post/Author/DateTime	Post
CobaltDeathWolf 07-30-07, 01:35 PM	Ntuka is a very strange person to say the least. Although he is quite a skilled magus, he would much rather tell stories around a campfire or in a tavern. He can be rather lethargic and he daydreams almost all the time. In the presence of more dedicated (and apparently less skilled) individuals he would most likely take the role of sidekick. Why he does this, no one can say. What can be said is that if necessary, he will rise to the occasion. He isn’t a very large man, a little over five feet tall. But he is very lithe. He wins most of his battles thanks to his dexterity, and magical abilities. He had a typical childhood (well, typical for a gypsy at least). He spent his time listening to stories that his “grams” told, gathering food, and helping to prepare for “Yel-Dorae”. This is what his particular family calls the annual hunt for werewolves and other lycanthropes. He never truly understood it. He’s a lycanthrope himself, so he often wonders why they don’t treat him the same way. He asked his mother about this many times. The only answer she ever gave was “Hmph, you can ask your father… if he ever returns.” He never knew his father. His mother often says this was for the best, since his father was a werewolf. He was by no means evil, but his tribe has a great hatred for lycanthropes for some reason. His mother was horribly injured while she was pregnant with him. She needed to undergo a very… unnatural procedure. She needed chaos surgery to live. This had an unforeseeable affect on Ntuka. He was born a mutant. The family did not shun him; they treated him as they would any other child, though they did tread lightly when they were around him. With so many strange and unnatural events involved in his birth, they wondered just how human he was. His third eye was what disturbed them the most. To fix this, his mother told him to where a head band at all times. He didn’t mind though, since it belonged to his father, he saw it as an honor. He also seemed to age slower than the children born around the same time as him. This greatly disturbed the elders; at one point they tried to perform an exorcism when he was a toddler. All Ntuka did was smile and clap his hands. As time went on, Ntuka found that he had a talent for magic. He could perform the most basic spells at will, even when the tribe’s most powerful magi could only use theirs a few times a day. His mother just happened to be adept at the art of summoning. She attempted to train him. But this did not work out too well. He always became distracted by a butterfly, his own magic, or something else his found interesting instead of paying attention to his mother. Apparently, all of this daydreaming is how he learns his spells. He doesn’t learn magic by studying it, but by understanding its true nature. Instead of forcing her method on him, she simply let him wander about and discover his abilities for himself. Ntuka asked his mother many times if she would train him in the art of summoning. She said no every time. She did not believe he possessed the discipline to become a summoner. He still doesn’t think this is very fair. Soon Ntuka decided to leave. His mother was very sad to see him go, though the rest of the tribe had mixed feelings of sadness and relief. Life was not as hard for him as the elders believed it would be. He was able to make plenty of money with fortune telling, dancing, and singing. He even devised a little contest. He would challenge a spell-caster to use their strongest spell against him; if he survived he would win their money. Obviously he’s never lost. At present, Ntuka is about 20 years old, but his mutation causes him to look only fifteen. He has short, black hair. His eyes seem to shift in color from a deep sapphire, to vibrant silver. He has lupine features (slightly elongated face, very pronounced canines, sharp ears, etc.), suggesting he’s less human than he appears. He is mildly attractive, although there seems to be an aura of… wrongness surrounding him at all times. He wears a blue head band that he never seems to take off. When asked about it, he simply responds with a raspberry. He is currently imprisoned. Why? He doesn’t know. Nor does he seem to care too much. He will soon be forced to fight for his freedom in a gladiatorial arena. ammendnments made! (and i thought that natural lycans only had a damage reduction of 10)
Morka 07-30-07, 02:57 PM	What is your character exactly? A high-dexterity swashbuckler bard? A savage werewolf? A spellfire user? What does he look like? Is it apparent that he is a lycanthrope? I'm not sure why you plogged "Chaos Surgery" in your background... Is it to explain his lycanthropy? What about simply telling his father was a werewolf? That could explain while the rest of the gypsie tribe hates lycanthropes... Why did he quit his familly? You could perhaps hint that he was more and more disliked due to his lycanthropic nature. Your mother could love you inconditionally, but the rest of the tribe could come to dislike you, even hating you. Especially if you did a bad, bad thing under the last full moon... After all, there should be a reason why the tribe hates lycanthropes... Lycanthropy could also explain why you're in jail. You could have done another bad, bad thing under the last full moon, but you can't remember what it was... Oh, one last thing: the whole story about challenging spellcasters and always winning is a bit arrogant, if not dangerous... After all, sooner or later, you might find you facing an epic necromancer who just looks like the next wandering sorcerer... But since you are a lycanthrope, with potentially DR 15/Silver, you could challenge fighter to strike you with their weapons, but just after making sure the warrior doesn't have any silver weapon!
CobaltDeathWolf 07-30-07, 03:06 PM	dangit!!! i didnt realize i left so many holes in the story!!! looks like i got some work to do.:embarrass thanks for the help morca, i'll get right on it.:D (and about the contest thing, i thought that was alright, since for all intents and purposes, epic spells are classified as 10th level spells. can he not absorb them since they're so powerful?:confused: )
Fithero 07-31-07, 08:59 AM	I think it has the basis to be a pretty damn interesting character, just need to drop a few more details in. (ie... just what the hell he is :P) A swashbuckling, spellfire wielding qypsy werewolf.... cool :D Peace
Morka 07-31-07, 10:23 AM	(and about the contest thing, i thought that was alright, since for all intents and purposes, epic spells are classified as 10th level spells. can he not absorb them since they're so powerful?:confused: ) I guess this issue comes from my lack of knowledge about spellfire wielding. I don't know anything about these rules. But for if you're 100% sure he can safely absorb any spell, go ahead! :cool:
CobaltDeathWolf 07-31-07, 06:46 PM	:bump: post edit bump:D