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Karish 04-01-07, 10:33 AM

Well, I finally finished the Warlock I was working on. I'm asking you guys for a little bit of friendly criticism or advice on any points in this story. For help, I have some of this mechanics as well. Aleksandr Alias: Wrath (name used by the cult to Fel'Shurak, now his accepted "name") CN Warlock 1, 19 year old Male Human. Blue Eyes, White Hair, 5'10", 170 lb. STR 13(+1), Dex 16(+3), Con 8(-1), Int 15(+2), Wis 10(0), Cha (18(+4) Background Alek was born in a small, out of the way village in the Northwest Territory of Endrall (Think temperate forests/marshes with arctic forests above, a few plains and hills dotted about). A fairly normal child for the most part, his only oddity was his taking to reading the old books of his dead father, a wizard who specialized in negative energy magic, necromancy, and the dark gods of forgotten days. However, as with many unfortunate towns not strongly fortified in the NWT, the village was one day targeted by evil. This evil, in particular, being a small cult to Fel'Shurak, an evil undead "god" said to be destroyed in the Old Kingdom long ago. They came for two things: Human sacrifices, and the reclaiming of Alek's father, who they believed to still be alive and wanted to dominate for power. However, when they found him dead, they simply took his books and destroyed the village. Alek managed to survive, but was wounded, defeated, and left for dead. When he awoke, he was alone. The villagers were either torn apart, or had been carried off as slaves or undead. The town was razed, and all valuables gone. Alek, seeing this, fell to his knees, crying out the names of those shadowed, enigmatic deities he had read of and learned to worship from the books his Holy Necromancer father had written of, Offering the whole of his being as a sacrifice to be able to destroy those who destroyed his life and the lives of his kin, pleading the souls of those who were lost to send his cry to them. The answer came swiftly. Alek found himself surrounded by shadows and overwhelmed by chhaotic forces, both good and evil at once. They slipped into his body, tore through him, dissolved into his blood and filled his soul with strength. As the shadows faded, he stood, a single voice, that of a thing he could not comprehend, spoke in a tongue he did not know--a tongue he understood and learned the instant it spoke--Abyssal. "Go," it said, "go and strike upon Fel'Shurak. The Ancient Ones have blessed thee." As Alek heard these words, the names of the dark gods flowed in his mind, and then the word of Fel'Shurak. He turned and walked from the village, and begun his hunt. At this point, he is a Warlock, granted his power by the Ancient Ones, a race of god-monsters who are locked inside the world of Endrall, being sort of Cthulhu-esque, with the exception of them not being wholly evil, but spanning the three Chaotic alignments. the name of Wrath was given by the DM, and all events have been OK'd by the DM. His hair was originally black, but turned white from a combination of the shock of events and the powers that filled him. Currently, he has max ranks in Concentration, Intimidate, Knowledge (arcana), Spellcraft, and Use Magic Device. He has the feats of Point Blank Shot and Precise Shot for his Eldritch Blasts, and uses those, a punching dagger, and a javelin as weapons. If there's anything you want to bring to the table, go ahead. ^_^