Post/Author/DateTime	Post
JulesCARV 04-06-06, 05:13 AM	My half-elf paladin, Jean-Paul, started as the bastard son of an Aundairan elf nobleman and his human maid, who died giving birth to him. He was raised by his father and stepmother, who already had an elf son and heir, and neither really liked him much. Anyway, in his adolescence, Jean-Paul basically went a bit chaotic evil: no murdering, but a fair bit of drunkenness, seducing commoner girls for the thrill of having power over them and abandoning them when he got bored, experimenting with shoplifting, etc. After semi-accidentally paralyzing his legitimate older half-brother from the waist down (he intended on making him screw up a joust by drugging him a bit, but didn't anticipate that he'd fall from his horse so clumsily that he'd damage his spine), he began to regret his actions: not at first, but over the course of the month after the accident. At first, he thought it was a minor mishap with excessive dosage, and that the Jorascos who soon have him fixed up anyway. Later, as his brother's injuries proved resistant to treatment, and as he began to realize that he was a pretty awful character and saw through his own rationalization, he regretted it. He confessed his role in the accident to his father, and vowed to leave and become a Templar of the Silver Flame in penitance. Yet goodness did not come natural to Jean-Paul, and reforming himself was a difficult process. As of the start of the campaign, he had progressed from being CE to being LN, and was a "fallen" paladin (a.k.a. a fighter-without-bonus-feats, although "never was" paladin would be more accurate). When I started Jean-Paul out in the campaign, I played him as pompous, self-righteous, arrogant, and resentful. In short, he was like the stereotype of the "paladin who isn't fun to play with." In the middle of first level (quite a bit sooner than I expected, in truth), he became a real LG paladin, when he was visited by the voice of Tira Miron while he and another party member were in the negative hit points. Our party didn't have a cleric or anything, and our artificer had a wand that shot either magic missile or cast cure light wounds, but only cast the intended one about 80% of the time on a d% roll (and that's IF the artificer makes the UMD check for a wand -- not always easy), so our DM used my backstory as an oppurtunity to pull a little deus ex machina and save the party by having me healed by the divine grace of the flame, and give me temporary unlimited lay on hands usage (at first level), to heal the other party member. I had intended to make him more of a "cool" paladin once he became a real paladin: more of a sense of humor, more open-minded, less resentful of everyone he perceives as being heretical or morally inadequate, etc. I also multiclassed him as a bard at 3rd level (using the Devoted Performer feat -- it's illegal, but not all THAT illegal: I just skipped the whole silly, arduous, contrived "fall as a paladin, become NG, take a bard level, become LG again, atone as a paladin, and take devoted performer" and condensed it into a simultaneously level-up and taking the feat). The thing is, he still comes across as pompous. Being raised by elf nobility, I want him to have an eloquent, aristocratic sound to his dialogue. It's not that he's trying to do it; it's just how his parents talked, how his bourgeois and aristocratic friends talked, and how he talks. I imagine that's how he talked before he ever tried to redeem himself. The thing is, I'm not an aristocrat, so I don't quite know how to do it right. The closest I can come is using a fair number of big-ish words, complex sentence structures, etc. The thing is, when I read what I wrote (this is an online game), it comes across as kinda pompous. I don't want him to be pompous. I want him to be a friendly, fun-loving guy with a sense of humor, yet a very serious dedication to morality, and not afraid to talk about what he thinks is right and wrong (when such matters come up). I also want him to talk in an somewhat aristocratic manner, just as a matter of ordinary, habitual language usage. Any tips?
Adrian_Crane 04-06-06, 05:19 AM	...up until you said it was online, my advice was going to be character acting plus tone of voice when delivering lines. The internet isn't very forgiving when it comes to little intricacies--sarcasm especially tends to get the shaft. I'd say just try to make it clear he's delivering things in a pragmatic, good-natured manner. Perhaps a *grin* here and there or, if that's not his thing, try to find words that make his mood evident. It's sort of hard to describe without actually doing. Bad: "Well, I hardly think such creatures would have any amount of wealth worth risking our collective necks for." It comes across as derisive and perhaps delivered with a scoff or a snort. Better: "Well," he grinned, "I hardly think such creatures would have any amount of wealth worth risking our collective necks for." Now it's more cheerful and perhaps said in jest or with a touch of sarcasm, all with a very minor alteration.
Derrhyn 04-08-06, 07:36 AM	If you can think of a famous person with the same characteristics that you want Jean-Paul to have, you should search a library and see if they have written an autobiography. Winston Churchill comes to mind, but it might be a little over the top to read a book just to get the tone of your character right. From my very limited experience, I don't think aristocrats of today can be easily distinguished by their language. You probably need to look back in time for good examples. Other than that I can't give you any advice exept to be careful to write correctly. Set the spellcheck for british english and of course cannot for can't and will not for won't and the sorts. But you probably figured that out allready. Good luck Derrhyn