Post/Author/DateTime	Post
zephyrmage42 02-20-06, 11:55 PM	I'm starting a new campaign with this character shortly, and wanted to see if I could get some critique on him. I haven't really made an archer before, so this elven ranger is something a little new to me. I like the character, but I'm having a little trouble getting into him, because I love to play charismatic, outspoken, leadership characters, and this was a conscious departure from this for a) the sake of something new and b) letting the newer players in the party take the lead. So, please tell me what you think, honestly. Does it make sense? Do I present a clear character? I have seen the quality of my characters grow steadily from my first real character a few years ago, and I want to keep it up! The elf before you is taller and more muscular than many of his race. His clothing is rugged, and it looks as if he would fade into a forest if you blinked too long. His dark hair is almost all contained within the hood of his cloak. His angular face carries a few minor scars, and his eyes are so dark to almost be black, and carry a sense of detachment, and deep sadness. The bow he carries looks both battle-worn and exceptionally well crafted. His movements convey a sense of purpose and fluid motion not often seen among the lesser races. History The story of the man who later became known as The Spectre among the armies of the Five Nations had his start, like many Cyrans, in a small village. In 740 YK it would be just over 70 years before the first lightning rail was devised. There was no talk of war; the thought of the great kingdom of Galifar crumbling was nothing anyone even considered. Zaenar was born that year in the town of Halfstead, just south of Metrol, the Jewel of Galifar. He lived in a community of mostly elves and humans, with the occasion intermarriage between the two. He spent the next 100 years of his life growing up, as all creatures do. His childhood self bears little resemblance to the man he has become, however. He spent the time learning the traditional was of his people, how to live in the wilderness, how to sing, and how to fight. He was first and foremost a Cyran, however. This is why, against the wishes of his parents, he joined the Cyran army shortly after the start of the war. He would not see the bosom of his great mother Cyre be invaded and trampled by the unjust; such were the idealistic thoughts of an adolescent. The first mention of him in any of the histories comes in the year 920 YK. By this time, Zaenar had spent as much time in the army as many of the human generals, and was operating alone on the battlefield. He had been honing his ancestral archery skill, and it paid of for the Cyrans. He managed to kill five enemy officers in the course of the skirmish with some Karrnathi troops. By this time they were facing the legions of undead fielded by Karrnath, and the removal of the officers was key to sowing discord in their lines, allowing the Cyrans a narrow victory against an overwhelming force. For his exemplary service, Zaenar was allowed to form a small unit that he would train to shoot like he did, to train them how to track, how to operate alone, and most importantly, how to remove the enemies of Cyre. They would operate behind enemy lines disrupting supplies and destroying what they could. Zaenar chose mostly elves for his unit, knowing they had much of the same ancestral knowledge. He trained them over the next few years, and then they were deployed. Their missions were dangerous, yet almost always successful. Zaenar lost friends though. Many of his unit were childhood friends, and mourned the loss of each, quietly and deeply. Within a few years however, his team was known across the Five Nations as the Ghosts, and Zaenar was known by most as The Spectre. The nickname came not only from his devastating ranged attacks, but the ancestral battle-mask that his father had given him that had a distinctive and disturbing black, leering face. In early 994 YK he was allowed a short leave, to return to the home he had not seen in many years. He returned to his home town, saw his parents, and spent the next few months a hero, and even became engaged to long lost love, Alara. They were to be married at the end of the year, when Zaenar would be leaving the army after one hundred years of loyal service to his homeland. A few months later, when on assignment deep in Brelish territory, Zaenar and his companions heard the news about Cyre and the Mourning. They were utterly devastated, and vowed that day that they would not rest until they had brought to justice whoever had caused the Mourning, the murders of their loved ones, and the rape of their homeland. Since then they had gone their separate ways. Since Zaenar and most of his companions are elven, they have the time and the will to do what it takes to discover the cause of the Mourning. Most of them became adventurers, seeking to travel all over Khorvaire in search of whatever information they could, forging contacts and allies that they could use along the way. Any members that had ties to either of the elven dragonmarked Houses returned to the headquarters to use their contacts to surreptitiously use any contacts there to find more information. They agreed to meet every year at their favorite pub in Sharn to share information and follow new leads. Mention of The Spectre and his Ghosts stopped after the Mourning, and enemy commanders sighed in relief, that they could again sleep soundly. Few, if any, knew that the now humble mercenary known as Zaenar was once this terrible figure. Zaenar keeps his death mask with him always, and only uses it when he dispatches an enemy of Cyre, so that they know, just before death, that the Spectre will follow them, through the end. And so Zaenar has traveled for the past four years, always alert for any lead that may lead to his ultimate goal. Personality and Motivations Zaenar is predominantly motivated by his quest for vengeance. Even through years of military training, he kept the free spirited nature of his ancestors, and enjoys being able to make his own way. He is not cruel, but will not go out of his way to help outsiders. He will do whatever it takes to accomplish his mission, however. A deep part of him believes that his family and loved ones may be alive, somewhere… Zaenar is soft spoken and slow to anger. His 258 years have taught him that the impulsive decision of youth and the younger races often are not the wisest. He studies people, and always watches his surroundings. He is rarely excited, even in battle he most likely keeps a calm, easy focus and reacts with intent and not impulse. Most find him a little off, withdrawn from the world. The only kind of religious belief he holds is a holdover of the ancestor worship from his Aereni forefathers. During his many travels he has carved simple wooden statues of his loved ones that he carries around and prays to, seeking guidance. He rarely does this, believing that it disturbs them in the afterlife. When he is not focusing on finding information about the Mourning, Zaenar spends his time honing his skills, perfecting his combat and stealth abilities. Sometimes he will adventure or take jobs simply because he thinks they will be a challenge. He functions mainly as a loner now, but is not averse to others. Most people seem alien to Zaenar, just as he often seems alien to them. He is rarely arrogant, and sees the boasting of other as a weakness, a way to let the enemy in. Some character inspirations Spike Speigel of Cowboy Bebop - His troubled past and profound loss leave him with few ties, and rarely reveals much about himself. Attacment to the past Maximus of Gladiator - He can lead, he can fight, he is wise, but he would prefer most of all to simply settle the score and a find a life somewhere. 5 adjectives I will try to remember when I play (and will put on a post it on my sheet) Patient Wanderlust/Search for Challenge Analyzing Guarded Focused
Vennettai 02-21-06, 01:52 AM	youve got a pretty good detailed story for him im sorry i didnt read the hole thing but from what i did read it sounded pretty good. now by your having trouble getting into the charecter do you mean you dont really know what he would do in situations and stuff or are you looking for more story ideas. cause i am thinking about making a ranger for my next campaign. i would say play him as a charecter that will sit back and watch the other newer players and unless there a long living race. you should probly look at them as if there kids and your the parent letting them learn from there mistakes and when needed putting your oppinion in. even if they ask you dont do it if it seems they could figure it out with a little more thought. thats what i think though