Post/Author/DateTime	Post
shalitanior1018 05-18-07, 08:27 PM	lets see who can come up with the funniest cause of death
Astron the Wizard 05-18-07, 09:42 PM	One time, when my brother was playing some sort of monsterous humanoid in the Savage Species as a fighter, we were investigating the slaughteriung of dozens of children in this ware-house when this assassin popped down from the rafters and began to attack (you knew that was going to happen, didn't you?)! Well, apparently, pour DM screwed up bigtime, and this encounter was way over our heads. It turns out that none of our attacks were effecting her, and she had full hit points. Soon, the entire party was down, except for my brother's character. He's a powergamer, and knows the rules inside out. Determined to live to stop a TPK, he used everything he knew to defeat her. In the end, He had to fight with her from the very very thin rafters. He tried to push her down to the ground far below, but she managed to bring him down as well. In doing so, he dropped his crossbow. The assassin didn't survive the fall, but he did. Rising triumphant, he screamed at the DM for XP. At that moment, his crossbow hit the ground and shot him in the back. He died.
Illeveun Bloodblaze 05-18-07, 11:13 PM	These were some deaths caused by me, but what happened was that my almost 20th level party were dropped on a island and was told to survive, Survivor style, except, we had to kill those we were not allied with, and were broken ito seperate teams. My character, an elf ghoul sorceror dragon disciple, came up with an idea while another person's character, a very evil necromancer with an undead army, my reanimator, built a small fort as a base of operations. We were allies, and what i did was animated a small army of skeletal rabbits, put explosive runes on their foreheads, keyed it to the necro, his servant(another character, played by my brother) and myself, and sent them all throughout the island. We won.
LaserBear 05-19-07, 08:22 AM	Our group had headed to an Atlantean style city rather deep under the sea in order to stop an ulatharid that had more or less bound himself to the tarrasque from completing several rituals that would awaken a tarrasque on every plane. The ulatharid had sealed himself in a hemishpere of negative energy and stone, after having desicrated several temples and rerouting power from the city's storage intended for powering the city's forcefield (the forcefield was still up, just weaker). In the center of the city was a temple dedicated to every good (and some neutral) deity, wherein trials for crowning a new king of the city were held, and when the trials would be completed an avatar of one of the deities would arrive to anoint the new king. The first test for the temple was a test of faith, where there was a chest and a rift to the plane of fire. In the room prior to this test there was an artifact that had been corrupted and was now used as a channel for the energy the ulatharid was drawing to power its rituals/shield. Our Crusader of Pelor decided that he was not going to sit idly by while there was an evil artifact nearby. Since sundering an evil artifact is just asking to be smote by the GM, he decided to drop it through the rift into a river of lava and run away after it fell through. So by the time he was done dragging the artifact to the rift, the rest of the party had run out of the temple and a ways down the street. Unfortunately for the Crusader, the rift errupted lava a round after he pushed the artifact through, so he was still in the adjacent room at the time. Our two gnome mages, and our psion tried valiantly to save him, but 20d6 a few rounds in a row kill many things at far higher level than 9th. Luckly for him there were a couple druids we rescued earlier that could cast Reincarnation, after the lava had cooled and we fished what little was left of his corpse out of it. All was not well for him as upon being reincarnated the avatar was summoned to find it's temple destroyed and him responsible. As such it Geas'ed him and his kin with serving Heironeous for 7 generations, which later played out as: whenever he would sleep he would be summoned to slay those who had displeased Heironeous.
McPoyo 05-19-07, 10:03 AM	I've had a character in a campaign, who was a dragonwrought kobold (Red dragon variety). He got a +2 on saves vs fire, so needless to say whenever the DM asked for a save I would always give a "It's X, but that's plus 2 if it involves fire" even though there was NO WAY it could involve fire. The kobold died last night, burned alive in a Web spell set on fire after stabilizing at -8 hit points. Talk about irony.
Zousha_Omenohu 05-19-07, 12:44 PM	I posted this one elsewhere, but it seems more appropriate for this thread. :D Back when my brother and I were young and inexperienced D&D nerds, we were playing a high-powered epic game, just 'cause we could. My brother was a paladin by the name of Pluhkar and I was a cleric of St. Cuthbert known as Artos (My brother and his friend made a lot of cracks about my name, namely "You...Artos-t" when I got into a difficult situation, which was most of the time with that character). Joining us was my brother's friend, who had introduced both of us to the game and was playing some uber-powered rogue-like character who we only knew as Gerbil. To begin at the beginning, basically my brother and I had been showered in gifts of late. I got the Mace of St. Cuthbert and Pluhkar had recieved his very own demiplane, a dwarf-built castle free of charge on an island, and a holy avenger (This holy avenger was identical to the one in the book...I think, other than the fact that he could point it at an evil creature and let go of it and it would fly towards the enemy like a missile. Yeah, we were that stupid.:rolleyes: ) Anyway, we're chilling at this keep (and we're the only ones there, no servants or guards or nothing). And all of a sudden, the sea drains away, clearing the way for a large horde of goblins (large as in millions of 'em:eek:) with juggernauts and submarines and great wyrm red dragons(though how they planned to use them in an empty sea, I have no idea). So, we're the only ones there to defend the castle, as they are already breaking through. I go to the kitchen to try and hold them off, while Pluhkar moves toward the gate. And as for Gerbil, well it was anyone's guess as to what he was up to. I spend a good deal of time trying to whomp the goblins, and I fail miserably, even failing to use its searing light power properly, so I decide to go and help Pluhkar. Meanwhile, the goblins raid the fridge, and go into the Heironean chapel at the top of the tallest tower in the keep, and doodle Hextor symbols on the walls while crossing out the Heironeous symbols. Pluhkar issues a challenge for the goblin leader to come forth and face him, which he does. Then he points his fantastic flying holy avenger at the goblin and lets go of it...so it clatters harmlessly onto the ground (the goblin leader was neutral). At this, all the goblins burst out laughing at him and then they mob him. I emerge on the other side of the battlefield (don't ask how, even I don't know how I got there!), and Pluhkar summons his mount, which shows up next to me. I get the crazy thought in my head to ride his mount over to him so I can help him fight the goblins. I do so, and as I have no ranks in Ride, I fail miserably. I get thrown from the horse and wind up landing on my back...with a spear in it! So there I am, impaled on a spear and staring up at the sky when I see a shadow pass over me and get bigger and bigger! THis great wyrm red dragon is comming in for a landing and it steps on me, basically reducing me to so much bloody mangled mess on the dry sea-bed. I don't remember how Pluhkar was done in, but I remember that same dragon having something to do with it. Some time later, we wake up, Gerbil having managed to get us ressurected. Apart from an empty refrigerator, graffiti all over the chapel, a dry sea-bed and the absolute and total humiliation of the whole affair, we were none the worse for the wear. None of us will ever know why the goblins went to such lengths to raid our fridge and tag our chapel (heck, none of us will ever know how we got a fridge in the first place!:D ) Please remember that the reason these ludicrous events played out the way they did was because we were new to the game and had next to no knowledge of the proper rules. We still chuckle about this, along with the story of the critical push.:D
shalitanior1018 05-19-07, 05:08 PM	one time i made a character for fun.i decided i wanted to use it in an adventure that my bro was DMing.i already had a bard but the character i had just made for fun was to low a level.i wanted 2 level him up when the other person in the adventure said that he was suddenly struck by lighting and died and i stopped bugging them.we later found out that that had been happening a lot in that town. That was ironic.
TalinXT 05-26-07, 02:30 AM	I've had a character in a campaign, who was a dragonwrought kobold (Red dragon variety). He got a +2 on saves vs fire, so needless to say whenever the DM asked for a save I would always give a "It's X, but that's plus 2 if it involves fire" even though there was NO WAY it could involve fire. The kobold died last night, burned alive in a Web spell set on fire after stabilizing at -8 hit points. Talk about irony. hehehe I think our dm did tat out of spite.
SpoonNinja 05-26-07, 11:21 PM	I have a DM who runs his ownstore, and he DM's for three or so groups, four now maybe, wednesday, thursday and friday. The group with the highest mortality rate is wednesday night, and they have died in such odd ways. Especialy since a few of them are way too into anime for the DM's way of doing things. So you have a bunch of people running around, shooting into melee, hucking fireballs in the party's general direction, and trying to attack a partly demonized Storm Giant with self-impaled(and working) black dragon wings, who they watched kill a copper dragon. So they were tracked down and eaten like popcorn chicken.
The_other_DM 05-27-07, 12:22 PM	depending on the situation, we sometimes roll for random treasure on the spot... no actual reason, just to give the game that extra bit of randomness. here is the best story of such a thing happening: players just finished infiltrating enemy stronghold. one player was a changeling beguiler. they just finished killing off the enemy boss and were looting his room. they roll for treasure and happen upon a good find: -necklace of fireball IV -other inconsequential stuff -necklace of fireball VI we all O.o at once. i knew they would do something interesting with it so i let it slide. this is the same group that later in the campaign nearly one hit killed an enemy with some rope, a few handfuls of acorns and a mage hand spell. the bad guy was lucky he made that second reflex roll or he would have slid on the acorns (after tripping on the rope) and fell off a precarious ledge to his doom. he just managed to fall on his back instead and crush the nuts. and boy howdy did they ever. changeling transforms himself into the boss (a 30+ disguise check after magic mods. he won't be noticed), and starts yelling that he wants all the minions in the courtyard, in a tight formation. he grab a lieutenant, leads him to the middle and gives him the Type IV necklace, "for helping out with those intruders" (referencing the party). as the party (in disguise/robes) goes to leave the compound, the changeling takes the type VI necklace and goes: fireball. needless to say, the lieutenant fails the reflex roll, the necklace he was holding explodes (as per the rules text, this released all the charges at once), and caused a charred crater to form in the center of the courtyard, with various fireworks and body parts flying all over the place. it was beautiful. we had to stop the session for a while due to laughter. wasteful use of treasure, but such a nice result.
leomunds_assistant 05-27-07, 01:05 PM	We tagged our groups fighter with the sticky, frost exploding grenades that do like 25d6 (we were epic) while he ran into various rooms of monsters. The fighter was level 26 when we started, and level 19 by the time we stopped. After one res, he still had a ton of stone and glass in his body and died right away. He kinda died a lot... good thing we had a cleric on hand :) I made a pyramid of severed heads with an evil rogue in the town center after receving a special dagger from olidamarra, and filled it with breaker bottles. The way we played, was if the bottles were filled with oil, etc they would explode. The next morning with the whole town at the center staring in disbelief, I detonated them. The all died. After that I took the mayor'r head, stuffed with the bottles, and took it to the evil guild place that was going to attack the town. Gave him the head as a trophy and got a nice little reward, and on the way out dropped some bottles in various locations. Needless to say that when I was about a mile away I detonated them via magical means. Yeah, That was a fun level except a dog stole my godlike dagger!! :cries:
LordDraxcis 05-27-07, 01:09 PM	in the advanced rules, poisons more often killed you than not. My character was searching a fireplace, and found a nest of snakes , which we destroyed. anyways, a few sessions later, we came across another fireplace. I told my DM that I wanted to search it, and said that the character was looking out specifically for snakes. Well, surprise surprise, more snakes. I failed the surprise roll thing, was bitten, failed the save, and died. Wonderful. Then, my brother decides that he wants to cast 'charm' on the incredibly venemous snakes. They all fail. As he tries to put the snakes in a bag (for some unknown reason) they wake up, bite him, and kill him. Double Kill! The Party's Elven Fighter3/Magic User3 and Dwarven Fighter5/Badass1 die because of a couple of little snakes. We are amazing. I have the best kill with a wizard ever. After my elven fighter/magic user died, we failed to raise him, so i created an elven magic user to replace him. we were fighting a bunch of trolls. they had just beat down our dwarven fighter, and I was out of spells. i threw a knife, rolled a critical hit (only hit I've ever made with a knife throw, actually), and killed the troll.
V8122 05-27-07, 05:06 PM	Backstory: We had chosen for instant death Criticals, as well as a house rule we made ourselves- a critical fumble is like making an attack against yourself, whith your highest BAB. Long story made short- my wizard/cleric/true necromancer was made to do community service and had to entertain some kids. So, I used a stick as a microphone, and made a perform check. Natural 1, my DM had mercy (so I thought) and let me roll as a critical fumble. I wasn't worried becouse 1. My BaB wasn't exactly great and 2. It was an improvised weapon. Critical. I still wasn't worried, and rolled to confirm it. Death critical. Now, beleive it or not, I got another 20. My big-scary necromancer killed himself, whith a stick. While Performing for kiddies. As community service.:eek:
John_of_Ark 05-27-07, 11:01 PM	Level 2 party. Our ranger latched onto the back of a stone giant (DM planned a little deus ex machina so we *wouldn't* have died). My bard, who is a lot like Red Mage from 8-Bit Theatre, manages to knock the thing over through the use of a grease spell to make the floor slippery and a bunch of explosives thrown at the thing's chest. Sadly, the ranger was on it's back, and was killed instantly when the giant fell on top of him. Although the body was more or less liquified, we have a merciful DM and he let us ressurect him back in town.