Post/Author/DateTime	Post
Coran 02-25-05, 11:27 AM	1) Fireball In an inclosed room. 2) Coup de grace while they sleep. 3) Taunt the Ancient Red Dragon. 4) Tell the King "It was them!"
Super Guy 02-25-05, 12:26 PM	5) "It's all clear, I checked"
Ogre4Hire 02-25-05, 01:01 PM	6) Trust me. 7) I'll make sure no one tries to sneak up from behind. 8) Don't worry, I checked it already.
Chazmon 02-25-05, 01:57 PM	9 persuade the paladin to use detect evil on the thief... if this doesnt work plant peoples items in each others bags and watch the fun begin. 10 end the fly spells you cast on the party at a crucial time (ie when there 500ft up with 3 hp) Fireballing the party is such a classic especially when the cocky rouge with evasion fails his save...
Master Of Twists 02-25-05, 02:25 PM	11. "ooooo look, a hecatoncheires the hundred handed one, its not that strong , honest" 12. "last time I looked, elves could breath for a long time underwater, go dive in that small underwater tunnel with a sealable hatch" 13. "go get this for me"
Delfedd 02-25-05, 04:29 PM	14) "Catch!" (says the wizard as he casts produce flame)
Darkstealth 02-25-05, 04:45 PM	15) You plant an illusion over the bottomless pit that it is really solid ground, and push everybody in. 16) You use Charm Person and make them provoke Nerull.
Azual 02-25-05, 05:18 PM	17) Replace the "Cure Light Wounds" Scroll with a scroll of lightning bolt :evillaugh
Kail_Atin 02-26-05, 07:39 PM	18) Fire trap. 19) Explosive Rune. 20) "I didn't find any traps..."
will07 02-26-05, 08:18 PM	21)"Sure, you can put your portable hole into your bag of holding...I'll just be over here." 22)If you are a spell caster use telekinesis to put a portable hole into a bag of holding.
Cellic 02-26-05, 10:45 PM	23) I swear to God, the last time I checked, that monster has a CR of 7. (The DM changed the HD)
Arrowhen 02-26-05, 11:29 PM	"I'll take... (YAWN!) ...first watch."
Creeg 02-27-05, 12:23 AM	25) Hand out "Gems" of course the gems are delayed blast fireballs....
Kalanth 02-27-05, 12:46 AM	26) Trap the door with a deadly trap, all the while pretending to disarm it. Fall to the back of the pack while using your diplomacy to convince them its clear.
OmniPaul 02-27-05, 02:45 AM	27) Cast Chill Touch on an ally while claiming it was a Cure Light Wounds and then convincing the others that the victim is really an undead in disguise, hence the pain he is experiencing 28) Disguise yourself as a party member when they're out shopping and then burn the local government head in effigy. 29) Constantly pay for some prostitutes to ***** themselves out to the ally. He's bound to contract some venereal disease.
Yak of Darkness 02-27-05, 03:21 AM	30) Bad combination of vorpal weapons and critical fumble charts.
R-man 02-27-05, 03:30 AM	31) Hastur, Hastur, Hastur 32) Pushing the big shiny red button with the sign over it that says"don't push this button under any circumstances" 33) Trusting the Rogue with the party treasure 34) Trusting wayward strange women that you find in dungeons 35) Not investigating fully the mission you have been sent on and just going in figuring you will kill them all.
Black Kitten 02-27-05, 05:25 AM	31) Hastur, Hastur, Hastur I actually got a player to say that when I was DM. They were ****** up a mission badly and needed a pitfiend/balor (don't recall) to get out of it. 36) Use the Staff of ??? on your friend. I forgot how it's called, but my DM used it to pull a TPK. It's effect are that you start to frenzy (as with Fenzied Berserker) and that you cannot stop until you cannot percieve any living subject. Also it cannot be subdued in any way but death. The only problem you will face it getting out of his way in time (but if you prepare yourself, you should be okey). The frenzying person will most likely be shot by the city guard or backstabbed by someone from the local thiefguild. 37) Study a death attack and execute it with precision.
Master Of Twists 02-27-05, 12:52 PM	38) slap one of the lord of the nine hells on the back of the head, say your friend did it, then run away very quickly
SkeeBah 02-27-05, 03:34 PM	39) If you're a high-level spellcaster with craft-abilities: make keen, vorpal razors and hand them out to party members.
GoodTeletubby 02-27-05, 04:23 PM	40) Set them up with a succubus escort service for the king's ball
Encard 02-27-05, 06:30 PM	41. Play a Frenzied Berserker with a low Will save. 42. Play a very hungry halfling and try to eat your wand of fireballs because it looks pretty and tasty.
Super Guy 02-27-05, 07:15 PM	Eh, sorry, what is "Hastur, Hastur, Hastur" ? From context it seems like a chant to summon a Pit Fiend/Balor. But, uh, where's this rule from? Could be fun :)
Encard 02-27-05, 10:47 PM	Eh, sorry, what is "Hastur, Hastur, Hastur" ? From context it seems like a chant to summon a Pit Fiend/Balor. But, uh, where's this rule from? Could be fun :) It's from the H.P. Lovecraft's Cthulhu mythos, actually, as I remember it... If you say that name, bad things happen to you. There aren't any rules for it in D&D since he's not part of any D&D setting, although there's probably something about it in CoC d20.
twad 02-27-05, 11:03 PM	43- "OOps"
Master Of Twists 02-28-05, 08:58 AM	44) Get a pea shooter 45) Keep on whistling an annoying tune 24/7
CuCulain42 02-28-05, 09:41 AM	Play a Tinker Gnome. :schemes:
Adrez Nesnsid 02-28-05, 10:10 AM	Eh, sorry, what is "Hastur, Hastur, Hastur" ? From context it seems like a chant to summon a Pit Fiend/Balor. But, uh, where's this rule from? Could be fun :) As Encard said, its from H.P.Lovecraft's Cthulhu Mythos. "Hastur" is the name of a psychotic space alien demigod who resides somewhere in the constellation Hyades. Regardless of his physical location, however, speaking his name anywhere in the universe supposedly draws his attention to the speaker (or, in some versions (according to the Call of Cthulhu D20 roleplaying game), gives him power over the speaker because naming him (even casually or accidentally) implies belief, and belief gives him power).
Thailfi 02-28-05, 02:04 PM	SPOILER ON OLD AXE OF THE DWARVISH LORDS MODULE 46 When running the old 2e module "Axe of the Dwarvish Lords" have the ranger speak with animals to the otters in the lake next to the main entrance. PC Ranger: "So, quick one, this huge beast with many heads that swims near the falling water, how many heads does it have?" Otter: Thinks for a moment then replies "Three". PC Ranger: "We can take care of that beast. Thank you for your help, friend otter" DM: Snickers to himself and thinks "Otters can't count" as party is ravaged by the epic 14 headed hydra.
HypnoticMonk 03-01-05, 05:16 PM	47. " What happened to that roll of paper that I cast explosive runes on?... What do you mean the paladin took it to the outhouse with him??!?" 48. " Ok, I will stick my head into this hole and look around..." 49. " sure, let's go into the Tomb Of Horrors. Just how bad can it be?" 50. "hey fred, have you told the DM yet that you are dating his ex-fiance?"
Titan W 03-01-05, 06:21 PM	31) 34) Trusting wayward strange women that you find in dungeons 51) on that note... decide it's a good idea to run off with a succubus queen then have your party follow (Darn I fell for that one...) 52) Buy the Neutral Evil fighter the buook of vile darkness and point out that if he kills the half-celestial in the party he'll get some cool powers... neglecting to inform him about WHAT the half-celestial can do to him... 53) "Hey look an angel, I wonder if it will help us out" (In Infernal) 54) (When with a party of spellcasters) "Hey look a bunch of orc-barbarians, looks like I get to have some fun" (In Orcish) "Hey these goodie-goodies want to kill all of you" 55) Of course the classic "You said that trolls USED to live here right..." 56) "Ooh this imp's tail will make a good whip, here touch it" (To a LG paladin)
Dotac 03-01-05, 07:35 PM	57) *To the DM* "Our party is invincible"
Janusunaj 03-01-05, 07:57 PM	58) Epic level spell taunt God's crotch. 59) Sleep with the Simbul
Master Of Twists 03-02-05, 07:09 AM	60) jump around pretending to be God. Then when they look at you and insult you, blast their head off with a shotgun (invent it first, unless it has already been done)
Tethka 03-02-05, 03:07 PM	61) Throw a chaotic evil god's holy symbol into the hole in the outhouse just before your allie uses the outhouse.
Slayers-CoA 12-15-05, 10:27 PM	62: DM: "Why did you kill everyone in your party?" PC: "I didn't do it! They all just.. jumped into my bag of holding, and i dropped it in the water!"
Rambo 12-15-05, 10:35 PM	63: "Trust me my mighty hero's, that dragon is asleep! I know tricsery when i see it!!!" say the Wisdom 8 Barberian.......... not kidding guys, that realy happened!!!
Wildonion 12-16-05, 08:27 AM	64) Here take this ring it turns enemies to stone! (Later when the poor soul tried to use the ring cast stone to mud on him) I never said YOUR enemies. :evillaugh
Clumsy_Conjurer1 12-16-05, 02:56 PM	65. That lollipop you are licking is a wand of fireballs. 66. Paladin saying "Come on we can take'um"
Thurbane 12-16-05, 11:43 PM	67. See an assassin advancing on another party member, then quaffing a Potion of Invisibilty, and NOT warn the other character becuase you are afraid the assassin will attack you instead. 68. Be a diviner who has gathered information through use of his spells, but only release it cryptically to the party as YOU think they need it, in an attempt to play an enigmatic character. 69. Deliberately sleep through your watch while camping in the wilderness because you feel that keeping watch is "beneath your station". (All three of these were done by the same player with the same character) :rolleyes:
White_Wizard 12-17-05, 10:22 AM	70) Just pick the bag with common potions and waste the following: haste, jump and levitate. Then catch all the alchemist fire flaskets into your hands. Now what you have to do is to make a big jump in the air toward your fellows fighting the huge hydra and, when you fly without control over them, just drop blindly the alchemist fire. 71) "Hey, Paladin, he told you're dumb!" 72) Just keep throwing magic missiles at your fellows' backs and then just say you didn't do it. The other party's wizard did it. 73) "Nah, I'm sure this is a fake trap!" 74) Cast the illusion of a knife stabbed in the body of the sleeping fiancee of the fighter and then say that the party's rogue killed her. Then, while they fight, cast hold person onto the fighter and, when the rogue stabs him to death with his sneak attack, wake up the fighter's fiancee and make her assist to her beloved's death. Once she dispatched the rogue it's fireball time. PS: feel free to use any deadly variation of the fireball. 75) "Hey, Dragon! They're stealing your gold!" 76) "Yes Matron Mother, they will come in unprepared" 77) "That was no ghost howl. Just wind." 76) "Have mercy, powerful Balor! THEY mocked you, not me!" 77) Just throw some othur into the campfire 77) "Never tried these hot dogs? They're delicious!" Just don't tell they're poisoned.... Ok, now with the contest: one of these hapened in a real game session. Which one?
Thomasyo4 12-17-05, 11:14 AM	79) wear bright pink robes and be the scout 80) when your party sneaks around the sleeping tarrasque scream "wow! its sooooo big."
Thurbane 12-18-05, 10:26 PM	...another couple from real gaming sessions: 81. Wait until the party is sneaking up on some bugbear guards, then suddenly decide to use your bardic "inspire" ability by (loudly) twanging your lute just as the party is ready to sneak attack the bugbears. 82. Have a party-war over some non-magical robes. Me - "I pick up one of the robes". Player 2 - "If you pick them up I'm going to hit you!". Me - "Don't be so stupid. I pick up a robe." *whack* Me - "Are you serious? We're in the middle of a dungeon and you're going to start attacking me, the cleric?" *whack again* Me - "Right, it's on! Make a save against Hold Person you clown!". After about 5 rounds of all the party jumping in and attacking players they secretly had grudges against, one solitary archer if left alive. He turns to leave, only to find out that the whole party-war was observed by the dungeon denizens, who are waiting outside the door to capture the lone survivor. ...oh, and White_Wizard, my guess is that number 74 really happened. :D
taltamir 12-19-05, 10:22 AM	82. use planer binding / gate / etc... put the circle of protection around YOURSELF rather then around the place where you summoned it... 83. Wait until they are almost dead... kill them the old fashioned way (so.... you are all at less then 5 HP eh?) 84. Teleport them to the "wrong" destination (that can be anywhere from the sun to a dragon's layer)
spoogemonkey 12-21-05, 10:49 AM	1) hiccups 2) hitting on the Queen/Princess 3) taunting the gods 4) saying "here, kitty, kitty" to were-wolves... 5) pickpocketing one party member and stashing the proceeds in the pocket of another 6) when a party member hesitates, say "it's a game for heroes"... 7) "we can just Jump it" 8) "it doesn't Look active "(volcano) 9) serving gelatinous cubes for lunch (with puddings)
Thurbane 12-21-05, 07:56 PM	94. Start a fight with three Wights by casting Color Spray at them, then discover that it doesn't work on undead.
orcslayer 12-21-05, 07:56 PM	85. "Its okay its only lever, no harm ever came from pulling a lever" Needless to say harm did come
Zevox 12-21-05, 09:44 PM	96. Poorly worded Wish spells :schemes: ("What? I wished for us to move with the tower to its new location, not for us appear under it when we get there!") 97. (Rogue to Fighter/Ranger/Paladin/Barbarian after spotting a Rust Monster accompanied by a Displacer Beast): "Ah, its just a big rat and a scrawny wolf. You can handle them easily." 98. Let the Gnome Bard/Rogue get near the party Wizard's wands ("Whats this one do?" *Use Magic Device on Wand of Fireball/Lightning Bolt/Cone of Cold/ect.*). 99. Travel with a Kender (if the party doesn't get killed, the Kender sure will ;) ). 100. Taunt a Marut with potions of longevity or ungeants of timelessness. Zevox
Titan W 12-21-05, 10:01 PM	101) Taunt the high level wizard with a remark about being unable to take a hit... 102) Use gate to call in demogorgon 103) Tell demogorgon it was the guy next to you 104) Use teleport without error and accidentally make a error "Oh you sad take us to some Place in the far east not take us to some Palace in the far east." (Specifing "Some Palace in the east" as the location of course, bonus if they asked about Duncan's house ore something Specify target "Take us to a Dungeon") 105) Play A LS paladin or a CS wizard 106) Play a necromancer and take your "Little Friends" into the shurch of pelor with your party and immediately say "Oh don't worry, they're with me."
Ralphius_Maximus 12-22-05, 07:42 AM	107. Rescue the wounded/unconcious members of the party from their captors with a necklace of fireballs (my rogue/bard once did this to some other PC's on the basis that he knew damn well it wouldn't hurt him) :D 108. "It's just one more room. How bad could it be?" 109. "They're only orcs"
taltamir 12-22-05, 08:10 AM	2) hitting on the Queen/Princess When I heard of the game act of war this is the only thing I could think of... (ie, is getting cought in bed with the queen an act of war :P) 110. Lets go dimension hopping.. i know this one perfect place... (go to a dimension where the conditions are non suited for human life, like -100 degree weather or some such)
belthazzar1113 12-22-05, 07:39 PM	99. Travel with a Kender (if the party doesn't get killed, the Kender sure will ). I would just like to say that i have successfully travled with a kender. My elan soulknife with a vow of poverty was able to walk with a kender and not worry about him stealing. 110. cast lightning bolt underwater 111. use a prayer bead of summoning while your party sleeps 113. make sure your the only person who can speak infernal, and offer to sell your partys souls to the first major demon you meet. and... in my games this one is very easy 114. don't help the other players make their plan, and then don't follow the insane plan that gets them all killed. just watch, smirk, retreat.
taltamir 12-23-05, 04:51 AM	115. Break that magic staff across your knee. (releases all charges at once... 50 fireballs and 50 chain lightenings and 50 finger of deaths... not pretty)
Ralphius_Maximus 12-23-05, 05:56 AM	116. Two evil rogues who have a one-upmanship thing going on.
Tuah 12-23-05, 12:28 PM	117. While they're asleep, use something to bond their hands to their head, then tie a piano cord around their necks and rope to their feet. Push them off a building. They'll then be hanging upsidedown, decapitated, and holding their own head! :rofl: