Post/Author/DateTime	Post
buckeyefan 10-31-03, 10:17 PM	What are some of you favorite famous last words said by a party member. Mine is "I bullrush the gelatinous cube".
F7 10-31-03, 10:31 PM	Not necessarily my favorite, but by a wide margin the most common: "I jump into the water."
UberBanshee 10-31-03, 11:10 PM	"I'll finish that Iron Golem with a well-timed fireball!"
Daemeon 10-31-03, 11:28 PM	"Nope, no traps here..." , said by a Rogue as he stepped on the pressure plate that ended his life in a blaze of fire...
DRAKERYM RAVENSHADOW 11-02-03, 12:01 PM	I had a character that feigned death to avoid being killed and was captured by ogres that had taken over a stronghold. I was stripped of my equipment and my baoddy was locked in the midden/outhouse. After busting open the door to search for my equipment, I found my self face to face with three ogres. There was only one option. I turned to the D.M. and said, "I jump down the hole."
Cog 11-02-03, 12:30 PM	"Thief: Did I say I was sneaking down the hall? As a master thief, I would naturally be crawling down the corridor searching for traps.... GM: Okay, whatever... *rolls* *the fireball trap once again hits the thief* Thief: DAMMIT! Okay, who has the most hitpoints? Barbarian: Rogar... :D Thief: Okay, fine. You do it." ~ The Gamers.
Theratule 11-02-03, 09:47 PM	"You shall feel the wrath of my blade!"
Chompman 11-03-03, 12:51 AM	Bah, there is no such thing as a dragon. Boy your beard is so messy Dwarf, here let me cut it for you.
Cog 11-03-03, 03:04 AM	Cog the Half-Orc (Knight of the Chalice) opens a door and sees a Fiendish Frost Giant standing in front of him. Cog: "Hello!" :D DM: He looks a bit like a demon... Cog: Demon? Kill it! One round later there was a dead Fiendish Frost Giant....
aldymnor 11-03-03, 10:33 AM	"Guys, it's ok. Dragons don't like to eat people." "Hand me the princess or I'll kill you and your little friend sneaking up behind me." "Something about this beer tastes a little.... off... *clunk*"
Sulaco 11-03-03, 10:34 AM	Try here: http://www.eclipse.net/~srudy/flw/
Feyd Rautha 11-03-03, 10:59 AM	I disbelieve. DM: You're standing in a large metal pot with holes in it to let the water you are standing in strain out of the sides once it reaches ankle height. As you ponder your situation an imp flies past you, says a magical activation word, and blasts you with a pair of magic missiles as he flies up ten feet to the lip of the pot and cackles at you. Mage PC: Crispy creme time for Mr. Impy...Lightning Bolt! What's a Tarrasque? Heck yeah I'll try on the magical bone necklace!!! Dangit! What spells affect iron golems!? Oh, I got it...Lightning Bolt! Hmm...dragonscales do make good armor...okay..let's go! So...you're a demonic assassin who has been masquerading as the party rogue? Prepare to die! I'll give you one free swing...c'mon...give me your best shot. Ah-hah...my "Final Word" bastard sword will finish you off after you make your pathetic attacks. That's all I could remember off the top of my head... Feyd
geist324 11-03-03, 11:45 AM	Rogue: Ooh, a shiny sword on a corpse surrounded by strange looking mold....I'm gonna go get it! Sorcerer: Two fully equipped rangers appear out of the cursed sword found on a destroyed liche. Sorcerer Alters Self to look like said liche. Sorcerer says, "Get away from my brother!"
Rian Lightblade 11-03-03, 02:33 PM	A Paladin of Torm "Die! Foul lich! A Half-Orc Barbarian, who spoke of himself in 3rd person, "Grimpick charges puny robed manling" A Kender Rogue, "By Reorx's bread! Do all minotaurs smell as bad as you?" A Human Rouge, "Trust me the orc's will never even know I was there."
WinoRhino 11-03-03, 06:25 PM	This was in a Warcraft adventure. That universe has guns and bombs. Pizer was a Goblin Tinkerer, adept in demolitions. - Pizer said, "I think I go out old school sapper style--just like Grandpa did in the 2nd War."
Briax 11-07-03, 05:40 AM	"Yes i know that the inscription on that door says i will be vaporized if i touch it... but i believe my god will protect me..." *touches door*
haste9 11-07-03, 06:01 AM	"I have a plan!"
Random bloke 11-07-03, 08:38 AM	This should actually be repetetive, yet very rarely mentioned in these threads: "AAAAAAAAargh!!!!!!!!!". Roll for initiative, biatch.
Black Kitten 11-07-03, 10:55 AM	Well, "I charge the goblin," were the last words of a lvl 8 character...
WarElemental 11-07-03, 11:30 AM	I will look into the well "Evil char behind me) (This happened to me)
WarElemental 11-07-03, 11:32 AM	I will read this book called treasure of the fire lords
DakezDarkenblood 11-07-03, 11:42 AM	Two seperate players, over a decade, who knew each other not at all. "Bah, what can she possibily do to me? It's only a woman." "Bah, what can a feeble man do to me?" They were both playing barbarians. Who says men and women don't think alike?
Darth Teddybear 11-07-03, 04:02 PM	"I pick the dragon's pocket." "Fzoul? That's a stupid name!" "Hah evil creature! You can't hurt me, I have a holy sword!" (from a player) "I only need to roll a 2 to save...This is too easy!" (rapidly followed by a scream, and sobbing. The character was hit by a disintigrate spell at the end of 4 years of real time gaming.) "Oo! Oo! I fireball the red dragon while it's asleep!"
Raistlin-Uber-Mage 11-11-03, 10:57 AM	my last words once were "well, that ogre should be almost, dead, and i'm outa spells, so, i charge with my longsword!" now i mourn the loss of my third level elven wizard. MOURN I SAY!! sorry, it just took me forever to generate him, and he was my first character.
Raistlin-Uber-Mage 11-11-03, 10:57 AM	my last words once were "well, that ogre should be almost, dead, and i'm outa spells, so, i charge with my longsword!" now i mourn the loss of my third level elven wizard. MOURN I SAY!! sorry, it just took me forever to generate him, and he was my first character.
Raistlin-Uber-Mage 11-11-03, 10:57 AM	my last words once were "well, that ogre should be almost, dead, and i'm outa spells, so, i charge with my longsword!" now i mourn the loss of my third level elven wizard. MOURN I SAY!! sorry, it just took me forever to generate him, and he was my first character.
Safti 11-11-03, 12:37 PM	I didn't die, but I was certainly severely inconvenienced: we were rolling paralysation saves for poison, and I needed a two on my d20; I have a tendency to botch important rolls, and I shook my head and said, "Watch me roll a one." And I did.
ViragoCoactus 11-11-03, 01:13 PM	"So it's an 18th level monk. We're 50 feet up in the air, and its not wearing any items anyway, so it's not like it has spell resistance. Besides- ITS UNARMED! How hard can it be to hit, it's not even wearing ARMOR. Besides, what's it gonna do? Walk through that wall or something? I bet. Just shoot it with an arrow, it'll never see it coming. Oh, wait. Stand back and watch me delayed blast fireball it. My save is like, 26. It'll never make it, and even if it does, its still lookin at 30 damage, right? Right."
yggdrazzil 12-03-03, 07:17 PM	Me playing ad&d for the first time. This ad&d was being sadistically mean. Check the signature, my famous last words. Followed up with: Now listen DM, one more of those tricks and you'll be looking at my baseball bat with a +5 bonus vs dm's!!! -Pete-
yggdrazzil 12-03-03, 07:18 PM	Me playing ad&d for the first time. This ad&d was being sadistically mean. Check the signature, my famous last words. Followed up with: Now listen DM, one more of those tricks and you'll be looking at my baseball bat with a +5 bonus vs dm's!!! -Pete-
William Coburn 12-03-03, 07:53 PM	Yelling at minotaur, "MOO!"
Uroshfighter13 12-03-03, 08:03 PM	.......ow....
Dragonsbane1313 12-03-03, 08:10 PM	Sry, it wouldnt let me delete this!
monkeyman 12-03-03, 09:54 PM	well this isnt last words, but it was humouros just the same. DM " the library is gaurded by a black dragon." my 7th level elven ranger to our 8th level dwarven paladin, "well lets go in there, kill the dragon, take his scales and make black boots out of them, well be pimpin' " probably lost some xp for that coment but it was hilarious.
monkeyman 12-03-03, 09:54 PM	well this isnt last words, but it was humouros just the same. DM " the library is gaurded by a black dragon." my 7th level elven ranger to our 8th level dwarven paladin, "well lets go in there, kill the dragon, take his scales and make black boots out of them, well be pimpin' " probably lost some xp for that coment but it was hilarious.
K.O.E.G 12-03-03, 10:25 PM	"Bluff Check to be really stupid and hope the mindflayers think I'm insentient!"
Enkeli 12-04-03, 02:28 AM	One PC: "I touch it" ("it" being a portal to planes of Chaos) Second PC: "I hold on to his tail" (PC 1 was a lizard man) They still survived, sort of; but as now half the party was in the realm of Chaos without any clear idea as to how to get out, I had them roll up new characters. And I had wasted a couple of NPC's so the lizard man could see that touching the portal wasn't a smart thing to do: unfortunately the character had sub-normal intelligence even for a lizard man.
melchiah 12-04-03, 07:04 AM	Safti That didn't just happen to me, but me friend as well, in the same combat, in the same round.., I was a 3rd level dwarven barbarian, and my friend was a 3rd level human fighter, and we were the fighting grunt in our party, with the highest Fortitude saves. We had just tracked down this basilisk, and rounded the corner to attack it, and it looked at us both. I could only fail my save on a 1, my friend on a 4 or less. Somehow the rest of the party managed to kill it, but I can't remember how, I don't think i was paying attention at that point...
Mercer 12-04-03, 11:57 AM	One of our players was a DM back in the long, nigh-forgotten days of 2nd Ed. Evidently, his players were stupid beyond all belief. A couple of choice bits... *SCENARIO A* Player: "I'm going to kick it in the snout." *SCENARIO 2* Player: "I'm going to hit that Sphere of Annihilation with a Rod of Cancellation." DM: "...the hell?" Player: "You heard me." DM: "Okay, I'm not even going to roll for this. You're all dead. All of you. I'm going home."
Rewes 12-04-03, 01:37 PM	The most famous last words uttered by any player ever.... /drumroll................................ "I can only fail on a 1."
paintedmask2 12-04-03, 05:41 PM	"I cast wish"
Lankin the Mad Mage 12-05-03, 06:52 AM	"A little "cuddle" in the bushes while the others dance? Don't mind if I do..." Said the barbarian to the Vampire nymph....
KelanenPrinceofSwords 12-05-03, 01:20 PM	"We can take them! As long as my cleric doesn't die, I can raise the rest of you, so what are we waiting for?"
KelanenPrinceofSwords 12-05-03, 01:21 PM	"I can draw as many cards at once from the deck as I want? Cool! I draw ten!"
howlingwolf 12-05-03, 03:10 PM	Best last words ever, that, well, they weren't said. Did a bit of fudging. *GASP!* Basically BBEG did the 'kidnap-family-of-paladin' routine, and after several close calls, a lost head, and one sibling murdered, they finally locked swords in the ol' Sanctum of evil, with said remaining family members about to be fed to a pet Hell-Hound. ( Longer story ) But anyway. Paladin storms his way through the rest of the BBEG's henchmen for most part, and lunges up the steps, shrugging off a acid arrow sizzling off his armour, and delivers the following speech. 'You come to my home, you tarnish the threshold with your presence, you abuse my family's hospitality, and then atop all this, you kidnap them, and butcher my brother to draw me in to your vile clutches.. *Heaves Massive Two-Handed sword..* WELL I'M RIGHT HERE! *Insert roar of rage and roll of dice for attack*' All very dramatic, and said BBEG was wielding a vorpal longsword. First d20 I dropped was a critical hit. Needless to say I kept that to myself and let things rock on ^_^ Could've been fun though.. Massive speech then *WACK* off with his head.. XD
Glide 12-06-03, 01:16 AM	Split up guys. It's only a 10 foot jump. Well...I uh...didn't really prepare any combat spells today per say...Would it help if I scryed or somthing? Pc slips down a very very large cliff. And is given many oppertunites to save himself along the fall. Ahhhhhhh!"-Attempts a grab, rolls a two. "Noooooo!" Attempts another grab, misses the DC by one. His fingers just slip off the rock. "Craaaaaap!" He fails a few more times and eventually splats. We could not stop laughing.
JohnCJ 12-06-03, 01:40 AM	Guaranteed last words at my table: "Okay, my new character is a Drow, but he's a good Drow, see? He left his evil homeland seeking acceptance on the surface, and..." "I cast Awaken on myself" "Wait a minute---I just checked the Monster Manual and it doesn't say anything about that creature having those abilities!" "Can I play a Kender?"
Fleetfang 12-06-03, 03:24 AM	One of my favorites from a Dragon Mag article from a long time ago (I think Sulaco's link has it in there somewhere) "What? No, I'm not reading your module. I'm just looking at the pictures."
S'yeit Dha'ges 12-06-03, 02:11 PM	DM: "wow, your lucky! he almost killed you!" PC: "ALmost only counts in horse shoes and fireball spells
Bunga! 12-06-03, 03:31 PM	"I hit the vampire with a garlic sausage..." "Planning, I don't need to plan! I charge in and react accordingly."
rathbaster 12-08-03, 05:15 PM	Just a few I wrote down in my notes over the years.... "Don't worry, they're only trolls." "Well, how bad can the poison be?" "I set the barn on fire...." -Rath
FireSpark 12-10-03, 04:18 AM	Acual quote from an ignoramus during a game just last sunday. Right after the party manages to survive combat with a young blue dragon: "Well, at least things can't get any worse." :twitch: