Post/Author/DateTime	Post
Wargamer 04-27-06, 06:57 AM	Note, in order to appreciate this story, you'll probably need to know about 40K. However, you may still find it funny without... Abaddon the Despoiler, lord of Chaos, watched his companions with apprehension. He offered a silent prayer to the Chaos Gods please, oh Gods of Darkness, let us get through this session without needless stupidity... "Okay, I'll cast Light!" Abaddon blinked, and knew his hopes were dashed. "Ahriman, you're a Rogue..." "I changed my mind, I'm a Wizard now." Abaddon bit back a retort whilst Lucius the Eternal admired his character sheet as if it were a porn magazine. "I..." Typhus gurgled, "would like to check if there... are any inhabitants..." Abaddon nodded, "right... The room is bare, save for a rotting corpse lying against the West Wall of a passage on the far side. Dried blood covers the floor, and rats scuttle in the darkness." "SLAY!" "No, Kharn! No slaying!" Lucius purred softly, "is there light?" "No," Abaddon replied, "it's totally dark." "No problem for me, I have Darkvision." "You're an Elf, Ahriman, you don't have Darkvision." "Yes I do, I'm a Dwarf now." "I've told you before, no changing classes mid-game!" "You didn't say anything about Races." Abaddon screamed, and walloped the Tzeench Sorceror in the face. "I want... to examine... the body..." A moment of calm returned, broken only by the gentle cursing of Ahriman, and the occasional twitch from Kharn. "Right... the body... the corpse is bloated and rotten, the flesh punctured as if shot with numerous spikes..." "I want to have sex with it!" Abaddon visably twitched. Kharn locked Lucius with a look of pure malice. "GORECHILD WILL DRINK YOUR BLOOD!" Lucius laughed, "ooh, your Barbarian is going to slay my Bard! How scary!" Kharn drew his mighty axe, "Bard?" he asked, before lunging across the table and hacking away at the Champion of Slaneesh. Abaddon groaned, "can't we get through one game without this happening!?" Typhus vomited phlegm, "does anyone have... a vial? I wish... to sample... the flesh of the corpse..." "No problem," Ahriman replied, "I'm an Ectomancer, I'll just-" Abaddon screamed, and laid him out again. "RIGHT! That is it! Ahriman, you catch plague and die! So do you Kharn, and you Lucius! Typhus... you just bloody well die! You all die! You're all f****** dead!!!!" With that, Abaddon picked up his books, kicked over the table, and stormed away. Lucius looked around at his fellow lords. "You know, I wish Abaddon could take this game seriously for once..."
konrad_the_tall 04-27-06, 08:30 AM	heh heh. made me laugh.
Rocketboy13 04-27-06, 03:35 PM	Yes, that does require you to know what the forces of Chaos are, and I do, and I enjoyed that...
humantoilet 04-27-06, 06:49 PM	very entertaining