Post/Author/DateTime	Post
The Fireballed Mage 11-14-04, 01:34 PM	Because Enquiring Minds without access to divination spells want to know! Get the most widely read news source about what’s happening in your world today! Get THE EBERRON ENQUIRER! LEARN all the secrets that THEY don’t want you to know! Be the FIRST in your village to know the TRUTH! “I dated ALL three daughters of Sora Kell… at the same time!” Marvel to the story of one man’s bravery, unmatched by any in the works of our competitors! Only here, in THE EBERRON ENQUIRER! Ashtakala… ancient home to corrupt fiends beyond imagination… or the BEST eating spots in the Demon Wastes? Find what our special envoy found for herself! “The Silver Flame stole my daughter! And they won’t allow me to see her!” HEAR the tragic story of the Keeper of the Flame’s MOTHER! “The Day of Mourning was caused by a group of shifters, calling forth some primal fiend using their savage nature!” LEARN the truth about the Day of Mourning that the royals DON’T want you to KNOW! READ the TRUE facts about airship travel, and how House Lyrandar is keeping the most important facts HIDDEN from you! A special report from our ace reporter, Kavin of House Orien. The rakshasa rajah… demonic fiends bent on world domination… or merely misunderstood furries? READ and DECIDE for yourself! DISCOVER the tragic love affair between Queen Aurala of Aundair and her secret paramour, the Lhesh Haruuc of Darguun! “I carved the name of my love in the trunk of Oalian the Great Druid! And lived to tell the tale!” After four THOUSAND years, is the Great Druid about to be made into LUMBER? You can’t afford to miss the TRUTH! Learn what the kalashtar want with the Breland’s famous Dragon’s Crown! The truth will SHOCK you! Uncover the way to use healing magic in the Mournlands! We’ve got the scoop! Learn the SHOCKING truth… King Kaius III… taken over and replaced by a changling on his wedding night! Learn about the tears his bride shed, NEVER to know her husband’s touch! “I jumped from Sharn’s highest tower… and fell upwards into Syrania, the Azure Sky!” With baited breath, READ one halfling’s tale of exploration and MYSTERY! SEE the only true map to the Demon Wastes’ Labyrinth! And we’ve got it HERE, in the EBERRON ENQUIRER! We tracked down Mordain the Fleshweaver’s secret love child! Who it is will SHOCK you! Read inside for more! “My husband was taken by the fey of the Twilight Demesne… and I don’t want him back!” Hear the wondrous wife’s tale, and how it CHANGED her world for the BETTER! “My old war buddy is a zombie in Karrnath’s legions… and we’ve never gotten along so well!” One old solder’s heart-warming tale of BROTHERHOOD… lasting beyond the grave! The unbelievable TRUTH… King Galifar I… held prisoner in Dreadhold all these centuries! Who else did we find in the prison? The truth will SHOCK you! “I married a Lhazaar prince… but so did five other women!” Hear true STORIES about the lusty PIRATES… and the women who love them! “I climbed all the way down Goradra Gap in the Mror Holds… and emerged in Sarlona!!” Thrill to the saga of ADVENTURE of descent into Khyber… and back out again! “I wrestled a Swordtooth Titan on the Talenta Plains! And won!” One gnome’s stirring story of BRAVERY and FORTITUDE! Valenar elves… fearsome wieldier of two-bladed scimitars… or are they overcompensating for something? A year-long uncover mission brings back ANSWERS! Read it here first! The Triumvirate in Zilargo… rulers of a peaceful nation… or the leaders of a world-wide gnome conspiracy of cheese hoarders? Uncover the SHOCKING facts! The elves of Aerenal are dead… but do they know how to throw a party! Learn what our special envoy to the nation of the DEAD found out! Discover wondrous real estate OPPORTUNITIES in Xen’drik! There is open, unclaimed land there, just READY for the taking! A special report by our Morgrave University affilate. “I was a teenaged member of the Order of the Emerald Claw!” READ this tale of young angst and rebellion! Learn how to prevent YOUR child from following the same path! “My wife cooks roast beef over the Silver Flame in Flamekeep… and I’ve never had eats so good!” Our flambé recipes are DIVINE! All these stories and MORE! Make your order for the EBERRON ENQUIRER today! Why waste your hard earned coppers on the lies the other paper from Korranberg prints, only WE have the TRUTH! And we guarantee it! [NOTE: Guarantee void in Adar, Aerenal, Argonnessen, Aundair, Breland, Darguun, Demon Wastes, Droaam, The Eldeen Reaches, Karrnath, The Lhazaar Principalities, The Mournland, The Mror Holds, Q’barra, Riedra, The Shadow Marches, The Talenta Plains, Thrane, Valenar, Zilargo, Khyber, Xen’drik, and any coterminous planes. All reports are verified as true, backed up by a Zone of Truth spell cast by a 2nd level priest of The Traveler. Actual truth content may vary.] So that’s the EBERRON ENQUIRER! Because Enquiring Minds without access to divination spells want to know!
Pallis 11-14-04, 01:45 PM	:ayyyy!: Sheer brilliance! Nicely done... Can I subscribe?
Honeycakes 11-14-04, 01:51 PM	:clap: :heehee
Joni-san 11-14-04, 01:56 PM	I am at a loss for words... :ayyyy!: :bow: :rofl: :heehee :tongue: :mage: Brilliant! :D
Gilgiga of the Hunt 11-14-04, 02:03 PM	Awesome. I see something like this poping up too "Changelings are they more than a Mystery? Are they in your HOMETOWN?" But I don't think I could ever come up with anything as good as "“My wife cooks roast beef over the Silver Flame in Flamekeep… and I’ve never had eats so good!” Our flambé recipes are DIVINE!"
DBlizzard 11-14-04, 02:30 PM	Excellent. Of course, for the real things swept under the carpet you need to read the "Weekly Eberron News."
Save-vs-DM 11-15-04, 03:26 AM	You know, I'd be happy to help you format and we can offer it as a download on the KC website... Cheers, SvD
ChronosCrow 11-15-04, 06:00 AM	haha, good one.
Green Gilled Dragon 11-16-04, 11:44 AM	Good to see the truth is finally coming out. ;)
CzarGarrett 11-16-04, 12:51 PM	Quality.
Belabras 11-16-04, 01:07 PM	The Triumvirate in Zilargo… rulers of a peaceful nation… or the leaders of a world-wide gnome conspiracy of cheese hoarders? Uncover the SHOCKING facts! Cheese hoarders is COMEDY GOLD! :rofl: :thumbsup: :D