[humor] The New Adventures of the Forgotten Freedom [Archive] - Wizards Community

Post/Author/DateTimePost
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:40 PM		Hey folks, this is the sequel thread to the 1001 rules for the worst party in Eberron. Essentially, its something of a mixture of a Play by Post with a discussion list on the nature of the setting. Mostly, it exists to be humorous and entertain.

Because the previous list has long since passed 100 pages of material, this is a thread devoted to allowing newer folk to join in or comment to the humorous elements of the storyline.

In any case, to celebrate the move here's the NEW Captain and special thanks to Cary Ewles and his performance as the Bard for the inspiration.

Special Note to Forgotten Freedom Veterans: This move is to be accompanied by the ending of all major and outstanding plotlines from the previous thread. Everyone is to reintroduce one another as a matter of course with links to their bio on the wiki for this for those whom don't want to do it in character.

All new plots are welcome but old plots are to be resolved on the previous thread which will keep running for a bit longer.

IC:

In a Tavern on an island off the Coast of Xen'drick

Cyrus Rose: SNOREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Waitress:Sir, there's a letter for you. And you're sleeping in your soup.

Cyrus Rose: No, I'm drunk. There's a difference. Hand it over toots.

Waitress: Thank you sir. Hopefully it'll contain the million gold piece inheritance you conned my father into believing you had in order to stay here when you're obviously a penniless bard.

Cyrus Rose: Oh, I see....this is a race issue isn't it?

Waitress: ...Pardon?

Cyrus Rose: It's because I'm a half elf. You don't like to serve MY kind here do you.

Waitress: No it's not that. It's....

Cyrus Rose: I see, liberal bar maid refuses to serve or sleep with the half-elf bard because she hates the half-elf.

Waitress: Sleep with you!?

Cyrus Rose: Half-Elves are GOOD enough for you are they?

Waitress: No, no of course not...I mean that's not the case. Oh fine, what time!

Cyrus Rose: After dinner.

*Snatches the letter*

Waitress: *trots off*

Cyrus Rose: I wonder how long it'll take her to realize she's an elf. Hopefully it'll happen the morning after. It'll save me some break up time. Let's see what this is, probably another bill.

Dearest Nephew....

Cyrus Rose: I have an uncle?

Yes, you have an Uncle

Cyrus Rose: Good to know.

I have decided to leave my ship and it's crew to you due to the fact I'm currently retired with all of their funds on a tropical island with many beautiful women. Also, this island has no extradition treaties with any other country on the world.

Cyrus Rose: Lucky son of a...

Yes, I am. In any case, the crew are a lazy bunch of good for nothings so you'll fit right in.

Cyrus Rose: Not interested.

Many are attractive women

Cyrus Rose: I'm interested.

I thought you would be. In any case, you will be required to be drunk, steal, and womanize the entire way through. The crew will be docking and this document enclosed will reveal that you are the new Captain

Cyrus Rose: Splendid.

Your welcome.

Sincerely yours,

Former Captain Jarlot of the Forgotten Freedom

Cyrus Rose: This is your way of kicking me off the island isn't it Uncle?

*next table over*

Jarlot: *surrounded by a bevy of beautiful women* Yes, I'm afraid it is. We took a vote. In any case, here's a list of things you're forbidden from doing.

*hands over a rather lengthy list*

Cyrus Rose: Oh brother.

Things the Party Bard is Forbidden from Doing

1. Lycanthropy is not an excuse to hump a woman's leg.
2. ....not that you ever needed an excuse.
3. It is wrong to infect a woman with a werecat's bite to make catgirls.
4. ....again.
5. I am not allowed to take the shifter's for a walk.
6. Even if the shifter girl is used to it.
7. I am not allowed to abuse to keep the changeling girl for myself and have all the changeling males handle the other male crew's sexual needs...
8. Even if they can't tell the difference.
9. "Either your memory is faulty or the night wasn't very magical for one of us" is not a way of greeting a woman you've wronged.
10. I am not the Anti-Christ. No matter how badly I behave. Must not tell the crew I am.
11. No longer allowed to drop pants for anything other than crapping.
12.No longer allowed to drop pants. Period.
13. I am to kill the Dragon, not challenge him to a game of riddles....
14. A game of riddles does not consist of a game of Pokemon.
15. Accurate Attack (Ranged) does not make me James Bond.
16. Nor does it make me Austin Powers.
17. Neither would give me the excuse to make witty remarks as people die or go "YEAH BABY" all the time.
18. Queen Aurala's daughters are not carrying my children.
19. At least they BETTER NOT BE.
20. It is wrong to tell the Female Necromancer that her dress code is "clothing optional"
21. It is wrong to tell the Female Druid that all rituals must be held publically and skyclad.
22. It is wrong to participate in the "Great Rite" with the female druid and sneak away before the sacrifice.
23. The Artificer is not Q.
24. Even if he did make me a lightning cart that can shoot rockets out of the back.
25. ...and a laser watch.
26. I will not splash water on Queen Aurala in an attempt to get her to melt.
27.....nor will I throw acid for this same purpose.
28. I will not attempt to call a sandworm in the Demon Wastes.
29. I will not shout "wyrm sign" whenever a dragon appears.
30. I will NOT attempt to ride it.
31. I am not "God Emperor" of anything and it is wrong to tell the crew this/
32. My name is not the somantic component for "Power Word Kill"
33. My name is not the somantic component for "Power Word Orgasm"
34. There is no such THING as Power Word Orgasm.
35. I cannot CREATE that spell.
36. Arrawai is not my copilot.
37. Neither is the Devourer.
38. Wolverine is not a 20th level Shifter.
39. It is wrong to encourage the shifter to try to become him.
40. Even if you offer to have the artificer bind the adamantine and the ring of regeneration.
41. Chain mail Bikinis are not the female crew's uniform.
42. Haste spells do not allow me to Matrix style dodge.
43. Bards are not the class for people who just want to ****
44. I'm a lover not a fighter is not an excuse to stay out of melee.
45. Scry spells are not to observe the Dallas Cowgirl cheerleaders.
46. Or any other locker room of cheerleaders.
47. Charm Person and Suggestion are not dating aids.
48. Polymorph Other is not used to make dates more attractive.
49. It is wrong to 'accidentally' shoot the Paladin at every opportunity.
50. My alignment is not "Sexy Good"
51. I am not the Diet Coke of Evil.
52. Beltaine is not when Tira Mirron comes back to life as a bunny shifter to pass out eggs.
53. I am not allowed to open a club for Longstrider shifters to serve gentlemen.
54. Knock Spells do not....well they actually DO only exist to help in stealing.
55. My middle name is not Link.
56. The former Captain's name is not Ganon.
57. I have not come to to town, to save the Princess Zelda. Whom ganon has taken away so now the children don't play but will...when link saves the day.
58. I will not sell quartz as "Rupies"
59. A Princess is not obligated to "put out" when you save her life.
60. ....and don't ask me why you would save her then.
61. Bull's Stamina is not used for sex.
62. A Holy Avenger will not be referred to as "The Master Sword"
63. It is wrong to tell the Paladin he has to find three magic pendants first.
64. Karrnath is a vaguely Transylvania like land. It is not Canada.
65. It is wrong to replace it's flag with the maple leaf.
66. It is wrong to introduce Hockey to become the national sport.
67. It is wrong to import a large number of Aundairians whom hate it there in the middle of the country.
68. It is wrong...okay FINE, its Canada now. Are you happy?
69. You did all of this to recruit the shifter from Karrnath to be wolverine didn't you?
70. It is wrong telling people that you are having sex with Spiderman's girlfriend.
71. ...even if its true.
72. You are not Spiderman.
73. Even if you have Spider Climb and Web in your spell book....
74. And Jump and Lion's Strength
75. And sell pictures of yourself in a bright costume to the Sharn Inquisitor.
76. It is wrong to tell Dwarves racial slurs.
77. ....even about elves.
78. Even if they started it.
79. Half-Elves do not get all the sexiness of elves and all the large 'good parts' of humans.
80. It is wrong to tell women this just to get them to bed you.
81. It is wrong to have a Lich kidnap Boranal's daughter just because she's named Zelda.
82. ....you slept with her anyway! She's the biggest **** in the kingdom!
83. Smoking "smokeweed" does NOT make me see into the Astral Plane, and it is wrong to tell the crew it does.
84. There is no secret Aurrum Handshake.
85. If there was, it wouldn't be the Pimp Slap.
86. I am not a Drow.
87. It is wrong to use "Change Self" to be a Drow.
88. It is wrong to be a Drow solely to say "Oh, it's because I'm A BLACK man isn't it?"
89. You already use that for being a half-elf.
90. The Skill "Performance" does not include "Performance (sex)
91. Nor can you max it out at every level.
92. You cannot take the Craft Skill "Craft (Ultimate Whoopass Stick)"
93. I will not rub the shifter's belly to see if her leg will twitch.
94. Valenar is not to be referred to as "Rohan"
95. Nor is Aerenal to be called Mordor.
96. I will not direct the crew to Sarlona to pick up hot Asian girls.
97. I did not learn the Jedi arts from a deformed green gnome named Yoda.
98. Nor did I learn them from Obi Wan.
99. The Jedi Mind trick is not to be used for Sex....and I don't know where you learned that.
100. The mythical land of Amazons is not one that I'm going to visit.
101. Summon Succubus is not your favorite spell.
102. It is not polite to spay the Shifter.
103. King Kaius does not need you as his dentist.
104. It is wrong to release a giant ape to climb the highest tower in Sharn.
105. The Dragon Prophecy is not a book by RA Salvatore.
106. Change Self to Orlando Bloom is not permitted.
107. I am not Will Turner's younger, hipper, cooler twin brother.
108. Just because I resemble Leogolas doesn't mean I get to do the arrow tricks from Lord of the Rings.
109. Dwarf Tossing is not the national sport of Mror Holds.
110. Or Valenar.
111. The Talenta Planes did not used to be a theme park before they started tampering with the laws of God.
112. It is wrong to get Talenta Planes halflings to go "YABBA DABBA DOO!"
113. Fred Flinston is NOT a Talenta Planes' halfling.
114. Gnomes are not to be referred to as "like Dwarves except they suck."
115. I am forbidden from wearing T-shirts that say "Elminster could kick this settings ass by himself."
116. Or "Mordenkaine"
117. Or "Strahd."
118. The Lady of Pain is permissable.
119. I do not have the Crotch of Vecna attached to me.
120. Besides, would you really WANT it?
121. Nor do I have the WANG of Vecna.
122. My wang is not +5
123. nor does it have the power of Striking.
124. or Dancing.
125. My wang is not magical.
126. It is wrong to tell the crew that it is.
127. You as a bard are forbidden from using "influence reactions" to get women.
128. You cannot reply "WHAT GOOD IS IT THEN!?"
129. Bard is not Celtic for Ninja.
130. I do not have Ninja powers.
131. Lisa is in a committed and monogamous relationship, it is wrong to place bets on when she'll end up drunk in bed with Michael.
132. Especially since it gives Michael hope.
133. It is wrong to use Ventriloquism to pretend to be Kanatash's demonic masters.
134. ...ESPECIALLY if you use it to make him do ridiculous things.
135. I am not Exalted, it is wrong to tell people that I am.
136. Vow of Poverty does not make exception for "booty" in various exceptions of the word.
137. I am not a Cleric of BlowShavitup
138. I am not allowed to proclaim myself a deity.
139. If I did, I couldn't grant spells.
140. The Rod of Seven Parts does not have my wang as part of it.
141. Fireball is not a response to tax collectors.
142. A Helm of Opposite Alignment should not be kept to shove on good people that annoy you so that you can kill them without guilt.
143. In a duel of swords or pistols, you do not get to answer "I'll take the pistols. You take the swords."
144. I do not have the Prestige class of "World's Greatest Lover"
145. Rubbing the Shifter against the floor is not a material component for Shocking Grasp
146. The fact I'm not your real Uncle doesn't permit you to date Jaela.
147. Even if she is legal now.
148. Canons are not party favors.
149. "I'm going to smoke me some b****" is not a proper response to any question about your profession.
150. Being a member of the King's Citadel doesn't allow me to ask women to lower their tops for inspection.
151. YOU'RE NOT A MEMBER OF THE KING'S CITADEL!
152. it is wrong to insert a philater of love into Michael's drink so he's open to the possibilities of Doog.
153. Stop asking Andrea about sex magic!
154. Terra is not interested in telling you about Druidic Fertility rights.
155. ....its for your own safety you obey 154.
156. I do not possess "crossbow time"
157. A black coat, shades, and black pants are not the standard D&D fighter wear.
158. It is wrong to sing "Kung Fu Fighting" whenever Bruce Ki enters the room.
159. Payday is never listed as "Tomorrow" as an excuse for the day never to arrive.
160. Elves are not to be described as "oversexed vegetarian *ussies"
161. Even if it's true.
162. You do not have the right to declare the first mate's quarters the place for your harem.
163. you do not have "nos prima nocte" with female crew.
164. The guilotine is not the preferred punishment for disobediance.
165. It is wrong to hire a changeling dominator for administering the lash.
166. The Aurrum are not lead by Sebastian Shaw and Emma Frost.
167. The Forgotten freedom's crew are not the X-men.
168. The Changeling girl is not to be referred to as Mystique.
169. Stupid is not Magneto.
170. Even if you Magnetize him.
171. "I was drunk" is not an excuse for anything.
172. Ketler is not so geeky as to never be able to know what a girl naked looks like...
173. There's the internet for that.
174. It is wrong to use crew to practice your archery.
175. Even if you pretend you intend to hit the apple on their heads.
176. I am not Robin Hood.
177. He allegedly gives to the poor.
178. Yes, I don't get that either.
179. Frankly, the whole tights thing scares me too.
180. Friar Tuck is not a role model for a well managed clergyman.
181. The Silver Flame is not powered by propane.
182. It is wrong to test this.
183. Kennedy is not buried under the Silver Flame
184. It is wrong to tell Lisa that it is.
185. It is wrong to add books to the Silver Flame canon when Jaela is not looking.
186. It is wrong to infect the crew with Lycanthropy just to make a dogsledding team.
187. Chun li is not a crew member.
188. Even if you dress up Marish.
189. The Lhazaar Principalities are not going to be invaded by Breland for oil.
190. I will not ask King Kaius if he's Tzimisce or Ventrue.
191. I will not plead mind control whenever I do something despicable.
192. I will not use Spectral hand THAT way.
193. Magic is not to be abused for sexual purposes in ANY way.
195. The Book of Erotic Fantasy is NOT official D&D supplemental material.
196. NOR are my stats in there.
197. Nor will they be in there for the 3.5 edition!
198. Paladins do not only have "vanilla" sex.
199. It is wrong to tell the crew this.
200. Bard is not Aundair for BADASS.
201. Aundair do not have a word for that.
202. I will not attempt to pass off Marish as a fair maiden to trade for the Dragon's treasure.
203. Trust me, she's not been a maiden for a good long time.
204. There is no such thing as a Were-Half elf nor am I one.
205. Eberron does not need to trade the Daughters of Sora Kell for the Seven Sisters.
206. There is not a feat called "Always win"
Gladius_Lucix

08-24-06, 03:42 PM		A lone halfing is sitting at a large drawing table in a laboratory, working on a some project or another. He looks up at the "camera."

Halfing: Hello, I'm Liam d'Ghallandha, resident student and only passenger of the Forgotten Freedom.

Audience Voices: Hello, Liam!

Liam: You may ask why someone would willingly become a passenger on the Forgotten Freedom, and that's what I'm here to tell you. For my doctorate degree, I wondered if there was some way to actually make the Forgotten Freedom's general insanity useful to the rest of Khorvaire. So, I came aboard and started studying the crew and the ship itself. My research resulted in the creation of this, the Weirsan Converter.

Liam points to a rather large device, covered in dials, blinky lights, levers, buttons, and the like.

Liam: This device converts the weirdness and insanity of the ship into usable energy, and transmits it to various devices, such as this.

Liam holds up a small cue, about two inches on a side, with a whole through the middle.

Liam: This is a Weirsan Reciever. Once the design is perfected, these will be marketed across the continent, as an aid to adventurers everywhere. Power Subscription fees will apply, of course. Until then, I'll continue working on various other items powered by Weirsan Energy. Goodbye!

Liam waves as the camera pans out and fades to black.
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:44 PM		I suppose the best analog is that it's the start of the New Season of Forgotten Freedom. Season TWO if you will. Muhahhahahaha. A lot of the current plots have been going on for literally dozens of pages and are pretty difficult to jump in on. This isn't a command to end your current plots in the old thread but an invitation to return to a bit more simpler storytelling for a while to build from there.

And yes, as a reminder http://www.wizards.com/leaving.asp?url=http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Main_Page&origin=

is the FF wiki.

Anyone veterans or new participants with questions can ask me via PM.
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:45 PM		Posted by Crystal Forged

Ah, got to love that new thread smell. Or at least I can since I don't have any major plots to move over. By the way do any of you want to place bets on whether the new boards actually work this time? What would the odds on that be anyways? 10:1? 100:1?

Now then for any body who's new to the tread, I'm responsible for some of the most sanity destroying posts on the old thread and probably one of the craziest of the veteren posters. That's saying something too considering most of them should be institutionalized and I'm only half kidding when I say that. My main character is Kanatash, a psychotic, psionic menace to the sanity of all. For more on him just check the wiki.

Kanatash: :rolleyes: Done padding your ego there?

OOCrystalforged: I should also mention since no one else has yet that the fourth wall between the creators and the creations has been thoroughly broken with the posters, which are refered to as entities from beyond non-existance (E.B.N.E), inserting themselves in the story as I am now.

Kanatash: Tell them about me! Quit ignoring me!

OOCrystalforged: While I'm at it since I don't explain it very well in the wiki I'll mention that Kanatash has taken on a life of his own and is now one of the voices in my head. Whether I'm pulling your leg on this is for you to decide however Kanatash has, at least partly, joined the ranks of the entities and even has his own Log In.

Kanatash: And now that he has finished stroking MY ego, we bid you adue.

OOCrystalforged: Happy posting, and remember, sanity is completely optional.

***

Originally posted by Cypher Zero

OOC: Um... Optional? Yea right. Don't listen to him. INsanity is manditory.

***

Originally posted by Kanatash

OOKanatash: Yeah, what the :censored: you thinking? Sanity is not an option.
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:46 PM		Introduction to the Ship

Rose: A brief introduction for everyone to this ship and it's crew from Moi. The Captain. I am Captain Rose Galan, third Captain of the Forgotten Freedom. The original Captains slowly had their Senator driven away in a manner not disimilar to Captain Murphy of Sealab 2021. If you wonder how we, characters from the Renassiance setting of Eberron know about Sealab, that brings me to our ship's artificer Ketler.

Ketler: Howdy!

Rose: Ketler is Khovaire's best artificer and because of this is quite capable of building machines that reach across the Demiplane of Shadow to pick up signals from the planet Earth. This is why that there are frequent pop culture references from the otherwise fantastic characters onboard this ship.

Ketler: My favorite anime is Evangelion and Gundam and...mphhh mphh mphhh....

*Rose has his hand on Ketler's mouth*

Rose: The Forgotten Freedom is the only known airship of sky-pirates currently active in Khovaire and is roughly the most wanted ship in all of Eberron. The ship has engaged in numerous acts of mass destruction and ill will to the point that most Navies are forbidden from actually trying to engage it in battle. Ironically, the crew has saved Eberron several times from destruction.

***

The Dreaming Dark: And I would have gotten away with it too if not for those meddling kids and their shifter catgirl.

***

Rose: The Forgotten Freedom herself is a former Lyrander airship that has been merged with the remains of a plane walking Shelvaresh Ship of Chaos like those found in the Great Wheel. This is one of the reasons that it draws so many strange and unruly customers. The ship has developed a life of its own and can only be controlled by a Captain of the strongest will.

Ketler: Oh, is that why we can't control anything.

Rose: Shut up.

Ketler: Shutting up sir.

Rose: The Forgotten Freedom is transdimensional due to its ship of Chaos parts and as such, every crewmember has his own quarters tailored to his liking. The interior of the ship is difficult to judge as its constantly changing and opening up random portals to bizarre locations. This is the source of the ship's crew in many cases. Can you explain a bit more about our inner workings, Ship's Wizard Andrea?

***

A Class room where the naughty witch-schoolgirl's outfit wearing necromancer Andrea has a gradate's cap on her head and a pointer for the chalkboard

Andrea D'Glycine: The ship is powered not by standard elemental rings but actually a series of bound elementals, demons, and devils that allow the ship to move through a wide variety of environments. The ship has an unusually strong link to Xoriat sadly and thus the majority of crew drawn to the ship are chaotic and evil. Which is a good thing because the "Named Crew" tends to horribly abuse these so-called "Red Shirts" and often lead them to their death.

***

Rose: So, if a crew member does this...

*Rose pulls out a stick of smokepowder in a bunch of sawdust, lights it and puts it in a Redshirts pants before kicking him over the side to a sickening explosion sound*

Rose: The victim probably murdered kittens and ate small children in his spare time.

Marish: Get to the good part!

Rose: This is our ships whor...

Marish: They call us COMPANIONS on Firefly.

Rose: Our ship's companion Marish, a shifter that has been blessed with softened features that she's more cute than terrifying.

Marish: Meow.

Rose: In any case, the ship is indirectly the cause of numerous disasters in the Five Nations with Aundair's Queen Aurala specifically hating us most of all. It's several years down the timeline from the main campaign setting and the Pontiff Jaela has been known to show up as a quasi-mascott of the ship, now a lady of eighteen.

Marish: She's become a magical girl!

Rose: And finally, we have our spiritual advisor onboard in Saint Michael.

Saint Michael: *waves cudgel* Frankly, I'm alittle tired of all this SINNING going on.

Rose: Uh...huh. Saint Michael is a disciple from the interdimensional correspondence course of Saint Cuthbert School of Religion and also a cleric of Dol Arrah. A former Blackguard, Saint Michael has a lot of sins to make up for and his goal is to beat it out of us. To that end, he's recruited an Archon sidekick named Cluebat-iel

Cluebatiel: I SENSE NAUGHTY THOUGHTS FROM YOU!

Ketler: Wait I...

*Cluebatiel hits Ketler in the head with a giant Mallet*

Saint Michael: Remember, the Kingpriest's word is law.

Ketler: What!?

Rose: I should also mention Saint Cuthbert's school of religion brainwashes an individual worse than Scientology. Michael has almost no understanding of the religion of Dol Arrah and is operating from his memories of Touched by an Angel, Miami Vice, and whatever he can get from Faiths and Pantheons until Keith Baker releases the Eberron religion guide. Until that point, he's mostly making it up as he goes along.
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:47 PM		Originally posted by Lugwrench

Pholly: Season two, huh? Do we at least get a raise?

Mickey: I did. I also got a note from someone to 'keep the healing coming'.

Hoybee: I got a raise, I think. I got a monocole. I can half way see.

Devon: I got a coupon for a free guitar lesson in Sharn. Whos the wiseass who thought this would be a raise?

Pholly: I didnt get a raise? Whats going on here. Im important to the crew as well. Okay, kind of important.

Mickey: Oh, I see whats up. On your pay stub here, it says you did get a raise, but its going to make repairs to the ship. Something about 'structural integrity' and 'back up to code'. Wow Youre getting royally hosed, man.

Devon: Guitar lessons? How many women am I going to impress with a damn coupon?

Hoybee: I would guess one more than youve impressed with your poetry.

Devon: Watch it, Beardy. Everyone knows that art is unappreciated in its time. History will vindicate me.

Pholly: Or deny you ever existed.....

Devon: philistines. :-p
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:47 PM		Originally posted by Silvercatmoonpaw

OOcat: *grumble* Anyway, I'm
SilvercatMoonpaw
……………
Whoops, had my cool voice on there. (fiddles with mental controls)

I'm responsable for…………well, I have no idea. Commentary MST3K style, maybe. Is there anyone out there that can tell me what it is I do?

Unlike the majority of people out there in the world, I am actually somewhat sane. Of course, to all those other people I seem like a complete wack-job, but that's just because they don't scrutinize the world as closely as I do. As a result I am free from rules lawyers and grammar nazis, but am completely incapable of holding up a plotline. I don't even try anymore.

I do three groups of characters (they are all on the wiki to varying degrees):

—Commentators:

——Silver, Bunny, and 13 do not exist. They can be interacted with, but they do not exist. This means that they are immune to everything and anything and all rules except that they usually follow the one they have for themselves which tells them not to do anything useful. Silver is a god (female) of fertility (well, mostly that "fun" bit ) who is completely in tune with how laughable to whole process is and actively encourages it. Bunny is a god (male personality) of death—and as such deplores any amount of uncreative violence (that doesn't lead to death)—who's hobby is pulling off the wackiest deaths possible. 13 has recently become a god (gender neutral) of all those little things that make you aware that you are alive and that death might not be quite so bad after all.

——Igor is Igor. Nothing can shake him from being the best servant ever. If you name a weird or coolly evil person in the history of Eberron, he's served them. Igor hasn't been seen in a while, maybe because Jarlot has left the ship.

—Caralot:

——Caralot is a mad scientist beyond the raging storm and out into that nice little calm lagoon on the other side. She seems perfectly normal, until she starts going on about all the different possible mating combinations there are and how she hasn't tried all of them yet. It's no wonder, then, that she's hooked up with resident psycho Kantash. The most interesting thing about Caralot's fascination is that she does all this in the hope of coming out with a creature so abberrant that it's cute.

—The Bar (Erk's Place, named by poster vote):
The FF's resident multi-dimensional access point and watering hole, Erk's Place opperates under the principle that bars are a universal place for weird people to end up in. It was begun by a small group of the Lesser-Used crew, but is now under the direction of Erk, a minotaur bonded to an odd god who values smarts over brute power.

Bunny: Long winded again.

OOcat: :-p
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:48 PM		posted by Lord Kale Fangblade

Greetings. *bows theatrically* I am Lord Kale Fangblade. and i at least attempt to try and not break the fourth wall as often as the others. but at the moment its been broken so often its not really a wall anymore...
Anyway. Here’s my current characters.

Sa'vor : ( Wiki link: http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Savor ) Sa’vor is a living death machine, trained on the battle fields of the last war, Shavarath and the battles the crew has got into.
Sa’vor is smart. Though prone to mistakes when he lets his emotions get the better of him. ( or I haven’t had much sleep when I post) . Sa’vor is responsible for creating Half-Dragons as a race of their own. And commands a legion of them.


Naz’roth: ( http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Naz%27roth ) Ex- Angel from Syrania, Naz’roth was falsely accused of using dark magic. Having turned his back on the light and embracing the evil within him Naz’roth Became a Daemon Lord. Naz’roth cannot be Permanently killed with any weapon (or magic) other than one wielded in his twin brothers hand. Naz’roth is legendary for his skill at item creation. An item made by him has almost no match anywhere else in this universe. Currently commands a legion of Devils (and a few demons) within Sa’vors citadel dimension.


Tara: ( http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Tara ) Another resident Necromancer, Tara is a Student of Naz’roths. Tara can often be found on deck. That or within the deep depths of Sa’vors Citadel dimension. ( currently commands a part of Sa’vors Legions)

Feal-Thas : Feal-Thas is Sa’vors created son. In ways he mirrors Sa’vor, this being his brutal and efficient combat style. Unlike Sa’vor Feal-Thas prefers to master his combat skill rather than his magical abilities. Feal-Thas is a first generation Half-Dragon which means he has been trained under the brutal efficiency of Naz’roth and Sa’vors Training and an adept commander. ( Commands another part of Sa’vors Legions)
__________________
I put the WAR in WARLOCK !!!
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:49 PM		posted by Darakhornanon

While The Captain is trying to cure his blinding headache with the world's oldest remedy (no, that's NOT Marish...), that is, by drinking the most potent beverage he could find, a human enters the bar. He is dressed in black leathers and wearing a sword at his side. His red eyes seem to be slightly glowing.

"Good morning, captain!"

"GOOD morning? Damn, my head hurts like hell... Who the hell are you, anyway?"

"I'm your new advisor, Aurixirthos. I've heard about the Forgotten Freedom's mission of pillage, plunder, unchecked (and completely unnecessary) destruction and the other fun, so I decided to join."

"Fine, and why should I want you in my crew?"

"If I may demonstrate..."

Aurixirthos looks at a bunch of redshirts who have made the mistake of passing by and exhales a gust of flames. The aroma of roasted meat fills the air.

Aurixirthos:
My bad. Won't happen again, Erk.

And Lucky, a friend of mine is writing a book with all his recipes in it: "Roasted
Virgin sweet-sour", "Silver Knight with baked potatoes" and so on. Shall I put you in
touch with him?
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:50 PM		http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Satnak
The queen ***** of breaking face

http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Kithle
Total jerk

http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Fluffy
Satnak's cat

http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Serene
Touch and die

http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Chalky
Will eat you lungs with honey mustard while using you bodily fluids as paint and your skin as canvas.
----------------------

Satnak - Its a brand new day for us.

Serene - Yes it is
---------------------

Chalky - Another one!

Narrator - Help meeeeeeee!
--------------------

Fluffy - Meow
------------------

Kithle - OK who's first on my list.
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:50 PM		I am Urial Angel of Death my characters are...

Squishy- The ship's resident neogi treasurer and a greedy bastard.

Volrath- The insane godling that takes care of the various aberrations wandering the lowwer decks.

Hannibal- a Lictor that I may or may not use.

Thing- Volrath's tentacle whip. Has only been mentioned once and feels lonely. I think he needs to be used. He was originally a crawling guantlet if that helps you understand the name.

Anti-Terrek- A character I am thinking about making. His name should be pretty self explanatory. (He would in no way be a serious character)
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:51 PM		By Silvercatmoonpaws

13: Jaela Jarlot is. Let's focus here, people. We now have three Jaelas:
Ninja Jaela #26: waitress at Erk's place, bouncer for anime types
Sakura Jaela: daughter of captain Jarlot, this Eberron's Jaela Darran
Jaela Jarlot: Alt-Jaela from a time hiccup, likes freaky photography

From now on Sakura Jaela is either Sakura or SJ, Ninja Jaela #26 has always been NJ26, and Jaela Jarlot is JJ.
Reply With Quote
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:52 PM		OOC:................ Hello? I was promised fresh meat.
-------------------------------------

213. Rose Doesn't have Jarlot's artificial kidneys.

214. So stop stuffing barrels of liquid keel hauling down his throat.

215. I'll keelhaul the lot of you.

216. This isn't working.
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:52 PM		Pholly: (entering the captains quarters) Hey, cap! Great news!

Kanatash: (floating in next to pholly) Yes, you should be pleased. Dooj just "bought" us an insane amount of alcohol.

Both Pholly and Kanatash pause, suddenly appreciating the bizzare sight before them.

Kanatash: Are you defecating into a cantaloupe?

Rose: (lifting a lampshade off head) Uh... this is awkward. I guess if I waitedn an hour, I coulda blamed it on the booze.

Kanatash: (floating out of the room) Freak...

217. Never enter the captain's room unanounced.

218: You will not spread false rumors about the captain.

219. Even if they're actually true.
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:53 PM		Party Favors all about and streamers acorss the ship

Rose: As a note, I remind you, what happens in the Captain's quarters STAYS in the Captain's quarters.

Doog: Fruity freak!

Rose: For that very reason.

Doog: You fruitf...

*Rose cuts one of the ropes on the mast and a chandelier hits Doog*

Satnak: Why are there chandeliers above us?

Rose: So I can cut ropes to drop them on you. Its all in the Eroll Flynn handbook. In any case, this is the WELCOME HOME PARTY for Lisa and Terra, our two lovebirds.

Doog: Right, the girls whom royally frelled up Michael so much he had to flee to the church to recover a semblance of sanity.

Saint Michael: I am at peace now with my brother man. I have invited the entire board of directors of the Disney entertainment complex to be spoken to of the virtues of Dol Arrah by Cluebatiel my cherubic girl-angel sidekick.

*Sounds of screaming and fireballs with flaming swords from inside*

Saint Michael: I got the idea from Dogma.

Rose: Uh huh.

Saint Michael: In no way, am I tormented by dreams of Sister Lisa's LUSCIOUS LIPS, her gorgeous bossom, her....*starts to drool*

Cluebatiel: NO MASTER! AWAY FROM THE LUSTFUL THOUGHTS!

*The little Angel girl drags him away for whipping*

Rose: That's possibly the second most disturbing thing I've witnessed today.

Ketler: What was the first?

Rose: Finding King Boranal alive and with Merrix D'Cannith in bed all this time in the hold.

Ketler:...that would qualify.

Rose: In any case, the following ground rules...

Ketler: Like?

Rose: Lisa is not to be informed she's actually already married to some prince or princess...Eberron is an enlightened state...as part of the Treaty of Thronehold. I've got a lot of money riding on war profiteering.

Ketler: Damnit!

Rose: Two, Terra isn't to be informed we destroyed her entire stock of pipeweed and smoked it all in one sitting. Or that after we smoked all the pipeweed, we ate all of her animal friends because we were hungry. Just blame it all on Doog.

Doog: HEY! WHY BLAME THE HALF-ORC?

Rose: Beause I'm pointy eared and you're pig nosed.

Doog: Ah, the RACE card again.

Rose: Three, don't inform Lisa she's got an identical twin sister whose become a blackguard and is killing off crew one at a time on board.

Ketler: Wait, when did this happen?

Rose: Oh right, I wasn't going to tell you this either.
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:55 PM		(and because I simply got bored posting individually)

220. The crew is forbidden from trying to make Lisa and Terra break their vows.
221. The captain can take a swipe at it once. The rest of you geeks are out of luck.
223. Rank hath its privilages.

Pholly: So Terra and Lisa are coming back?

Hoybee: Aye, t'would seem. It'll be good to see those two again.

Mickey: Hoybee, I dont think youve even seen em once.

Hoybee: Sure I did. I was at the weddin' after all. There was a black 'n white blur marying a silver blur. It was beautiful. I think...

Devon bolts into the room.

Devon: Hey guys, check this out! I used that coupon for the guitar lesson.

Devon plays an interesting tune, and for once, reality doesnt warp, neither does a dalkyr appear and tell him to stop :censored: -ing up the Spacetime Continuum.

Marish (passing by) Meow! Very nice. My cabin, 8 pm. Dont be late. (she winks at Devon and keeps walking)

Hoybee, Pholly, Mickey: :OMG!

Devon: *looking pretty damn smug* Well, guys. Ill see you later. I need to go get ready for a date. *exits the room*

Mickey: Holy :censored: I think we've seen one of the signs of the Apocalypse.

Hoybee: Which one? Devon getting a date, or Devon actually playing a good tune.

Pholly: I think both qualify as a sign.

***

Satnak - I don't think you ever got to meet Terra, and Lisa.

Serene - Oh they stopped by Dad's place during the honey moon.

Satnak - Oh. Did they say if they swung by the island? the paperwork involved is ridiculous so if I start now I can have the worst of it done before hand.

Serene - No they didn't mention it. Your gonna have to take me there someday.

Satnak - I want to let things calm down a bit first. Between that fiasco the other day, and the general chaos well...

Serene - Ok silly girl, but I won't forget.

Satnak - :yawn:

***

Captain Rose: I'm hardly trying to make them break their wedding vows. No, I've had enough of that after the reprocussions of breaking up the marriage of King Karrnath to his elven wife.

Saint Michael: How did thou doest this?

Captain Rose: Why are you speaking like The Mighty Thor?

Saint Michael: Clerics can't spill blood so I'm wielding a warhammer.

Captain Rose: Maces usually spill lots of blood.

Saint Michael: SHHHHH.

Captain Rose: In any case, when the vampire's wife gave birth to me, it was a pretty big clue I think that their marriage was over.

Ketler: You could be half vampire.

Saint Michael: *TURN UNDEAD*

Captain Rose: You're trying to turn me with a Necronomicron.

Saint Michael: You guys don't use that?

Captain Rose: No.

Saint Michael: How about chains, torture implements, inverted pentagrams, or demonic icons.

Captain Rose: This switch from being a blackguard must be painful.

Saint Michael: I have Cluebatiel to keep me from naughty thoughts. I'm mostly clean except when I think about Lisa.

*WHAM*

Saint Michael: She uses Lisa's....

*WHAM*

Saint Michael: Old hammer to beat me. The mace that heals when it strikes so you don't actually harm anyone when you're beating the crap out of them.

Captain Rose: Uh huh. I've been married five times.

Saint Michael: What happened?

Captain Rose: The Princess keeps realizing I'm a dirty, dirty, half-elf and leaving me. I'm apparently an addiction for her. She's taken twelve steps to get over me.

Saint Michael: Well we've had a bunch of romances end in tragedy. Only Lisa...

*WHAM*

Saint Michael: And Terra have survived.

Captain Rose: Yeah, in Jarlot and Aerith's case, he's still trying to commune with her spirit. Guy needs a girlfriend.

Doog: Well me and Ishmael Junior are still together.

Ishmael Junior: SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. What happens in the Eldeen Reaches, stays in the Eldeen Reaches.

Doog: Friend, a poster over your wall of the Eldeen Reaches doesn't count.

Saint Michael: When did Ishmael become a named character?

Captain Rose: Hell if I know, all I know is one day he got the EXP and became a Ranger.

Doog: I wonder if we'll see any new characters since so many old ones have died.

Aerith: I'm just regenerating or did everyone forget that Devas are frickin IMMORTAL in Eberron?

SHHHHH. Remove all the drama from your death!?

Aerith: That's what the FF7 crew said when they removed my ressurection scene!

***

Liam is sitting at his desk, working on a new invention.

Liam: It's no use! I can't think of anything. The Riven went home with Tormos, so I can't study that. I want a break from Weirsan, because I think I'm starting to get some adverse effects. I don't know what to do!

OOGladius walks in with an armload of Duct Tape in all different colors, and drops it on Liam's desk.

Liam: Two questions. What's with the Duct Tape, and why did you walk instead of poof?

OOGladius: I walked because I was carrying a heavy load, and the Duct Tape is for your next project.

Liam: What, am I going to mass-produce Duct Tape wallets?

OOGladius: Nope. You're making a Duct Tape Golem!

Liam: That just may be the stupidest thing I have ever heard.

OOGladius: Fine! If you don't want my idea, think of your own.

OOGladius disappears with his *poof*.

Liam: I just ****ed off my own entity. That wasn't smart. :censored:

***

Captain Rose: And by the way, I'd like to point out if I'm any Drawn Together character it's not the pig.

Doog: You'd prefer to be Xandirr?

Captain Rose: Listen, we don't speak of my brother at the house very often. Not since, you know...I don't mean to sound prejudiced. But not since he decided to become a Wii system character.

Doog: Wait, he's your brother?

Captain Rose: Well Jarlot, me, Xandirr, Cloud, Squall Lionheart, LINK the guy who took credit for ALL of my adventures, Tidus, and Fighter from 8-bit are all from the same family to be perfectly honest.

Doog: Holy crazzap.

Captain Rose: Ignore how this totally contradicts any other background I have.

Doog: It'll cost you five Rupiees.

Captain Rose: Oh FINE, take it and die. They're everywhere in Hyrule anyway. Not that bling ever won me the heart of the woman I loved anyway. Stuck up snobby self-styled racist Eowyn-Arwen combination rip off.

***

Elsewhere on Eberron

Princess Zella of Valenar: I have the oddest impression that a dirty, dirty, dirty half-elf is talking about me somewhere.

***

Aurixirthos:
You'd really like to know, wouldn't you, Chalky? Let's just say I'm NOT interested in Jaela - if any of you wierdos got your hands on her. In that case she won't qualify anymore...

Suddenly red lights go on and Captain Rose's voice can be heard everywhere on the ship.

Captain Rose:
Red Alert! Red Alert! Incoming Dragon! Brace for impact!

While everyone runs to his station, Kanatash listens in to the dragon's thoughts.

Blue Great Wyrm:

Where the heck is he? I'm sure my divinations have shown me this ship... What's this? PUNY HUMAN!!! WHO ARE YOU TO DARE INVADE MY MIND? I WILL CRUSH YOU!!!

Kanatash:
I'm Kanatash, servant of powers greater than even you can imagine. And I will crush YOU - or more to the point: Your mind!

Blue Great Wyrm:
Try it. Wait a second, did you just think "Kanatash"? This is the Forgotten Freedom?

Meanwhile, on the bridge.

Captain Rose:
Lieutenant, prepare photon torpedoes! And give me the status of our shields!

(Orc) Lieutenant Orf:
Aye, aye, captain! Shields at 80%. Torpedoes will be ready in 30 seconds.

Back in the dragon's mind.

Kanatash:
Yes to both questions.

Blue Great Wyrm:
Holy crap! Mummy, HEEELLLLPPPP!!!

The dragon veers away and beats a hasty retreat. A REAL hasty retreat.

Captain Rose:
Fine. Ensign, return to our old course. Warp 3. And someone get me my Earl Grey!

220. No more annoying additional powers.
221. As if there was anyone we haven't ****** off - yet.
222. Ketler, for all the gods' sake, stop creating rifts in reality! Especially not if anything with "Star" comes through!
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:56 PM		Silver:……………………………………………………I'm bored. :bored:

Bunny: :eek: Run for the sake of the brain function that you value most!

13: *yawn* What's wrong?

Bunny: Silver is bored!

13: :ghosted:

Rose: Whoa, whoa, hold up there. So what's the problem?

Bunny (grabbing the front of Roses's shirt): Do you know what happens when a god of fertility etc. does when they get bored?

Rose: Creates a hoard of hot chicks to tie the crew up and perform unspeakable acts of sex on them?

Bunny: :blink: ……………I should have seen that one coming. NO! When a fertility god gets bored they—
*******
Marish: Cuddles? I'm pregnant.
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:57 PM		Because he posted earlier and I'm not if he's going to do the other..

Liam is working in his lab, the pile of Duct Tape still on the desk. Liam looks at it, then returns to work. Suddenly, he tilts his head to the side, then stands up, grabs a Weirsan Reciever, and starts searching through his wands and staves. Grabbing two, he scoops up the Duct Tape and enters a side room.

Liam: I hope this doesn't fail too badly.

Pulling out the first staff, he makes a hollow anti-magic field so no stray power escapes. He then attaches the Reciver to the second staff, and fires off two charges, the first an Animate Objects at the Duct Tape, and the second, an Awaken Construct. The end result is intelligent, animated Duct Tape.

Liam: It did work. Amazing.

Duct Tape Swarm: Hello, master. What is there to do?

Liam: Nothing right now. You may explore your new home.

Duct Tape Swarm: Okay, master.

The Duct Tape Swarm rolls out.

Liam: :uh-huh:

Liam watches the Weirsan Map as a new signature leaves the lab.

--------

Duct Tape Swarm
Tiny Animated Object (Swarm)
A few hundred rolls of Duct Tape, the Duct Tape Swarm is Liam's latest creation. Moving around by rolling, it is currently tasked with exploring the ship. Capable of speech (somehow), vision, and hearing from any portion of itself, and functioning as a perfect hivemind, if any length of Duct Tape from the Swarm is placed on any surface, it will be able to relay the information back to the main Swarm.
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:58 PM		Hoybee, Mickey, and Pholly wander into the mess hall for breakfast. Devon is sitting at a table with a 1000 year stare on his face. Theres a cup of coffee on the table in front of him, but its apparent he hasnt touched it. Hoybee, Mickey, and Pholly grab a mess kit and some food, and sit down next to the shell-shocked bard.

Mickey: So, Dev. How did your...umm....date....with Marish go, last night?

Devon: Need.......morphine.......

Pholly: Is he okay? He looks like hes been through Khyber and back with just his shorts on.

Hoybee: Simple enough logic for that. A date with Marish must be about an EL 25. I think ol' Dev, here, was just a wee bit unprepared for that.

Devon: Need......more.....lessons.....

Mickey: *checking Devons vitals and Hit Points* Whoa. You've been through the wrigner, man. What in the Dragons happened?

Devon: Remember........yarn.........and......ba seball glove.......

Marish wanders in, spots Devon, and slinks up to him.

Marish: Purrrr, thanks for the.....song.....last night. *gives Devon a peck on the cheek, then walks out*

Pholly: Musta been some song. You alright, dood?

Devon collapses forward, his head hitting the table with a resounding THUDD!!

Devon: ......ouch..........
Reply With Quote
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 03:58 PM		Ash: Chayotic Neutral Kenku Rogue 9, Psion [egotist] 1, Pyrokenetic 10, Elocater 10.
An undetected stow away onboard the Forgotten freadom Ash is a fusion of oposites. Stealthy, but obsessed with fire his myschevious nature and love of fire may explain Pholi's frequent explosave misshaps. Though content to hide his gregarous nature has recently come to the fore, and he emergedfrom hiding. Can now be found in Eriks place wating for a good hiest, drinking anything that burns, and chalenging other fire weilders to contests.

223: Ash is not Orvile, nor has he ever said 'I wish I could fly'
224: He's an elocater, so he can.
225: Sweet Mira Tirron people, hes not even green...
226: I dont care what Chalky did to him, thats not his natural colour.
227: He does not say 'I taught I taw a puddy cat' iether.
228: His bunk is not in the crows nest.
229: Putting it there, dispite Pholi's claims to the counter, would not halve the number of onboard explosions.
230: He was not put on this ship just to be another bird Devon wont score with.
231: His lack of relevance thus far was not discrimanation 'Becase he is black'
232: Dispite the tendency for valuables to disapear around him he is not half magpie.
233: Hearing Marish say 'I feel like chiken tonight' does not mean Ash is about to get lucky.
234: Ok... So it does. Why is she the only crewmember who knew about him.
235: Her atraction to him is not derived from his ability to create a wip at will.
236: If the above is incorect I am not to be corected. Ignorance is bliss.
237: Espechaly in that much detail... Erick, Leathe water please.
238: He is not being permited to stay on the ship solely becase hes one of the few who might indulge in some piracy.
239: Actualy thats a lie, thats exactly why Im letting him stay.
240: He may not brandish any staff, rod, wand or djorie and declaim 'This is my boomstick!'
241: Addendum; he is forbidden from quoting any Evil dead films under any circmstances.
242: Not aloud to respond with words 'is that it' after being targeted by fire spells.
243: becase Nalfen takes it as a chalenge and that cant end well. Thats why.
Gladius_Lucix

08-24-06, 04:05 PM		Thanks, Charles! I was going to repost my other posts, but I wanted space between them, first.
urial angel of death

08-24-06, 04:52 PM		Nalfien eneters his room in a rage. Cuddles tries pitifully to hide in the corner.

Nalfien: You idiot! You brought lupens to third edition! You sinned against nature itself!

Nalfien grabs Cuddles around the neck and begins strangling him.

Volrath runs into the room.

Volrath: Nalfien no! Your hands are far too weak.

Nalfien lets go of Cuddles and Volrath grabs hold.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

08-24-06, 05:15 PM		Ash, speaching in well asured aristoctaric tones dispite his beak.
"Gentlemen, gentlemen. Theres no need for violence aginst the wreched hound. Theres every chance Marish's children are mine."

Nalfen "That would make them half cat, half raven. What the hell is that?"

Volrath "Confused..."

(OOC: Thanks for reposting Ash Charles, wasn't looking forward to retyping all that again. :thumbsup: )
urial angel of death

08-24-06, 05:20 PM		Volrath: That would result in a mongrelman or broken one. Only slightly better.
rampant

08-24-06, 05:25 PM		OOC: Gryphon? btw is the return of Terra and Lisa going to be posted on this new thread as well? Its confusing.
------------------

Devon - What about me?

Caralot - Um there is always the chance that since cats typically have litters there could be a couple for each. At least on this ship.

244. No one is allowed to start a betting pool on the results of MArish's pregnancy.

245. The one at erk's is giving me a cut so use that one.

246. No using time magic to cheat on the pool.

247. Unless I'm in on it.
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 05:27 PM		OOC: I believe that Kaiser Ryu is going to post an entirely seperate one for this thread. We'll see today sometime I'm sure.
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 05:33 PM		Rose: Ahhhh, time to practice my Bardic insturment.

Marish: Hey! There are mommies to be present!

Rose: I'll bear that in mine. Just nine months until I'll be able to have a decent pair of mittens.

Marish: GAH!

Rose: Of course, I mean I'll buy some to celebrate your children's birth.

Marish: *whew*

Rose: From KITTEN-FUR GLOVE MAKERS!

Marish: GAH!

Rose: Made from all synthetic materials.

Marish: *whew*

Rose: Except for the Kitten Fur.

Marish: GAH!

Rose: In fact...

*gets out a straw hat and a cane like in the old musicals*

Rose:

Some men hunt for sport,
Others hunt for food,
The only thing I'm hunting for,
Is an outfit that looks good...

See my vest, see my vest,
Made from real gorilla chest,
Feel this sweater, there's no better,
Than authentic Irish setter.

See this hat, 'twas my cat,
My evening wear - vampire bat,
These white slippers are albino
African endangered rhino.

Grizzly bear underwear,
Turtles' necks, I've got my share,
Beret of poodle, on my noodle
It shall rest,

Try my red robin suit,
It comes one breast or two,
See my vest, see my vest,
See my vest.

Like my loafers? Former gophers -
It was that or skin my chauffeurs,
But a greyhound fur tuxedo
Would be best,

So let's prepare these cats

Doog: Kill two for matching mats!

Rose: See my vest, see my vest,
Oh please, won't you see my vest!

Marish: *faints*

Rose: Ah one more notch into catching up for the Captain for pure evil.

*pulls out his bardic insturment....THE BAGPIPES!*
Darakhoranon

08-24-06, 06:08 PM		Aurixirthos:
Hey, Ash! What about a little "target practice"?

Ash:
Sure, why not? Let's go get some redshirts.

Erk:
NOT IN MY BAR!!!

Aurixirthos:
Calm down, Erk. They wouldn't be able to run anywhere in here, so where would be the fun in that?


More or less half an hour later on the Forgotten Freedom's main deck. About fifty redshirts are standing in ragged lines frantically looking for an escape route. All possible exits have been blocked - apart from the emergency exit...


Aurixirthos:
Ok, these are the rules. We'll take turns throwing fireballs, using our breath weapon or whatever to kill redshirts. Whoever gets more, wins. But only fiery deaths count.

Ash:
Ok, I'll go first.

Aurixirthos:
Feel free.


Ash uses his psionic powers to immolate six redshirts at once. The survivors scatter, but the five targets...eerrr... crewmembers trying to open the only unlocked door are fried by Aurixirthos' fireball (which also burns a hole into the hull of the ship). Two redshirts thank the gods for their mercy and jump out. Ash manages to catch one of them with his fire-whip.


Ash:
7 : 5 for me.

Aurixirthos:
Watch this.


Aurixirthos casts a spell and countless fiery arrows appear next to him. With a flick of his hand he sends them forth, killing about twenty hapless redshirts and taking the lead in the contest. Ash counters by taking out several flasks and starting to set fire to the whole deck. Aurixirthos steps into the raging flames and picks up a surviving piece of one flask to read the label.


Aurixirthos:
"Pholly's Alchemist's Fire Mk III". Nice move, Ash.

Ash:
Thanks. I've watched the little guy's experiments for quite some time.

Aurixirthos:
Only watched them?

Ash:
...


The "target practice" continues for a while until Ash manages to take down the last redshirt. The whole main deck looks as if a couple of bloodthirsty pyromaniacs has run amok there. Which is after all exactly what has happened.


Ash:
By my count, I fried 24, you toasted 23 and 5 redshirts became red smears on the countryside below us.

Aurixirthos:
Yeah, you're right. You've won. This time... Let's get something to drink - burning down things (and people) always is such thirsty work.
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 06:18 PM		Rose: Oh yes and starting yesterday, I started a policy that you have to pay a 50 gold piece fine for every Red shirt killed. They are company property and aren't to be used causally.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-24-06, 07:04 PM		Nalfien: You idiot! You brought lupens to third edition!
OOcat: They were already in 3e. Dragon magazine. I forget the issue, but they were chosen for the Compendium. So stop beating the poor fool.
Ash, speaching in well asured aristoctaric tones dispite his beak. "Gentlemen, gentlemen. Theres no need for violence aginst the wreched hound. Theres every chance Marish's children are mine."
Devon - What about me?

Caralot - Um there is always the chance that since cats typically have litters there could be a couple for each. At least on this ship.
Silver: Sorry, Devon, but Marish got pregnant before she hooked up with you. No chance.

Devon: Awwww—

Silence: *FUME!*

Devon: :eek: :help:
244. No one is allowed to start a betting pool on the results of Marish's pregnancy.

245. The one at erk's is giving me a cut so use that one.

246. No using time magic to cheat on the pool.

247. Unless I'm in on it.
OOcat: 248: Silver is not allowed to bet on the grounds that she already knows. :ahem:
249: Caralot is not allowed to bet because she can use her super-advanced genetic knowledge to screen the babies.
250: Due to the fact that she has already done this, no one is allowed to consult Caralot.
******
Scene: Sunset, a tropical beach, an umbrella, a lounge chair, scattered bottles of rum, a good-looking retired pirate half-elf.

Marish: One of them's yours.

OOC: I get up pretty early in the morning. And I'm an anti-bully. :devil:
rampant

08-24-06, 08:04 PM		Rose - Is this a pirate ship or a daycare center?

Satnak - You shut it, I'm the one who's paying for their education. I'm gonna need a real job, pirating just doesn't pay enough.

Rose - What?! We steal whole freaking banks. At any given point we have the GNP of several countries in those holds.

Satnak - Not since Ariajni, besides thats chump change.

Norbaz - Forbes must be wealthy snake-man.

Satnak - HAH! most of it goes to repairing the school, that and the insurance premiums.
Crystalforged

08-24-06, 09:51 PM		OOC: Just thought I should let you guys know beforehand, my posts are probably going to be kind of sporadic here for a whil-

Kanatash: :rolleyes: Your saying they aren't already?

OOC: MORE sporadic since I'm going to be heading off to start college. By the way, I don't suppose any of you know of any gaming groups in the area of Rapids City, SD? I know the chances are basicly nil but I figured it couldn't hurt to ask.
urial angel of death

08-24-06, 10:03 PM		If you consider about 300 miles to your southeast "in the area" yeah.
Charles Phipps

08-24-06, 10:13 PM		I salute you Crystal_Forged.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-24-06, 10:18 PM		OOC: @Crystalforged: I live in Chicago.
I CANNOT FIND A SINGLE GAMING GROUP WITHIN REASONABLE DISTANCE!
So don't be complaining that you can't find one is SD. They apparently live in random places.
Crystalforged

08-24-06, 10:50 PM		OOC: :gah: Don't hurt me. (wimper)

Actually I wasn't complaining about not being able to find a group, just saying I was going to be in the market.

Unless I'm wrong, I do however, sense a fair amount of bile over the subject for you. :P

Kanatash: Congratulations captain obvious.

OOC: I didn't really expect any of you guys to know anything but yeah... Anywho I figure the gaming comunity in Rapid can't be smaller than it was back home considering there it consisted of me and a single friend I taught the game to.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-24-06, 11:14 PM		OOC: Ok, I'm FINALLY able to post again, and have caught up. Since they already came back on the old thread, I'm only going to post their bios here.

Terra Branford (~260 years old)
NE Female Elf/Half-Fiend/Half-Celestial
Druid 13/Sorceress 18/Psion 9

Lisa Hopeforge (is technically ~30 years old, but due to a Potion of Youth, is physically closer to 20)
LG Female Human
Paladin of the Silver Flame 22/Kensai 5

Elina Branford (9 years old)
CN(?) Half-Elf/Half-Fiend/Half-Celestial/Werewolf (possible)
Spirit Shaman 3 (ECL ~ 10)

Sarah Hopeforge (9 years old)
LN(?) Half-Elf/Half-Fiend/Half-Celestial/Werewolf (probable)
Scout 3 (ECL ~ 10)

Terra and Lisa married not too long ago according to the FF's timeline, but due to their traversing of the planes on their honeymoon, ten years have passed for them. During that time, they each concieved and bore a daughter (Terra->Elina, Lisa->Sarah). Do not ask how this happened, I'm not telling. :P

Due to the unusual circumstances around Terra's Native Outsider status, the Demonic and Angelic energies have not been diluted when passed to her daughters. The Werewolf part comes from Lisa. Her father, High Cardinal Krozen, is half-were and passed it on to her, but it is dormant. It seems that the addition of Terra's genes have caused at least a partial awakening of the disease in their children.

The full extent of Elina and Sarah's powers are not known, as Terra has restrained some of the more potent energies until they are able to control them, using a system of magical seals around their Chakra points. As they mature, one by one these seals will fade. So far, the Root (survival/grounding/instincts), Heart (love/relationships), and Throat (creativity/communication/integrity) seals have unbound. The Brow (imagination/intuition/insight) and Crown (knowledge/understanding/awareness) seals appear to be weakening.

Terra gave up her Soulknife levels in order to purge her system of the familiar Terrek gave her, but has found a replacement. She modified Genevive, the plant creature she created as an "enforcer" of sorts in her rule of the Underground, to act as her new familiar. Primarily focused on defense (Terra pretty much has offense covered. Elminster is her b*tch :P ), Genevive enhances Terra's Regeneration as well as any healing spells she casts.

Lisa has further enhanced her already fearsome Paladin abilities with training as a Kensai. Her signature weapon is the Sword of Sutekh, which she has enhanced to an Merciful Axiomatic Holy Sword. Her Oath is to rid the Church of the Silver Flame of the corruption that plagues it, driving it to hurt so many as it "purifies" the land. Volrath is quite happy about this, but he may have gotten the wrong idea about how she intends to do so, considering he offered to help in the purges he thinks are coming...*sigh*.

Elina and Sarah, in an effort to avoid confusion, have taken to calling Lisa "Mamma", and Terra "Mom". They tend to follow their parents directions, but like all children, they enjoy testing the limits of what they can get away with (they fit right in on the FF). They are amasingly skilled at going undetected, because when you have a mother with a listen check that looks like a phone number, you've got to be good to get away with anything.

Ok, that just about covers the update. I'm almost out of time, so I'll get their Wiki entries updated tomorrow.

Hopefully...
rampant

08-25-06, 01:57 AM		Satnak - OK you rascals what are you sneaking around Serene's and my backs.

Elina & Sarah - :eek: but how'd you see us?

Satnak - I didn't, you think these ears are for decoration or something?

Sarah - Mom has even bigger ears and we can sneak past her.

Elina - Yeah

Serene - My Satnak has trained her ears more thoroughly.

Satnak - Right, though I'm willing to bet Terra has an eye or 3 dozen on you at all times.

Random Squirrel - Chirrup *tries to look innocent*

Sarah - So what were you two doing anyway?

Satnak - Still digging huh? good show.

Serene - We where just enjoying the view.

Elina - Momma said you got wings. All I see is a tail.

Satnak - And whats wrong with my Tail?

Serene - Nothing silly girl, but these two came to see your wings.

Sarah - and the Cat

Satnak - I haven't Seen Fluffy much lately. Just at meal times, and ocne in a while when he leaves me breakfast.

Serene - Wait!, you eat those rats and birds he keeps bringing you?:yuck:

Satnak - Of course, what did you do with the vole he left on your doorstp last week.

Serene - I think one of the chilis got to it before i did, becase my welcome mat was eaten away.

Elina - Wings:ahem:

Satnak - Alright, :rolleyes: oh impatient one.

Satnak Stands, and takes off her outershirt to reveal a backless under shirt.

Satnak - I don't need to go through my shirts any faster than normal.

The grey lines across satnak's skin pulse briefly, then the wings unfurl seemingly from thin air. A set of great crystal moth wings, then bird-like, then finally bat-like.

Sarah - Wow..

Elina - Awesome
LugWrench

08-25-06, 03:39 AM		Pholly is back at work in his lab, mixing up a vat of something that burbles ominously. He is carefully trying to measure an amount of silver liquid from a beaker marked 'High Explosive'.

Elina and Sarah: HI PHOLLY!

Pholly *fumbling the explosive* Gaah!! *he catches the explosive before anything goes boom*

Elina: Mommy says youre the one who keeps blowing himself up.

Sarah: Yeah, how do you do that. Is it because youre just bad at whatever that is?

Pholly: Actually, kids, this is very delicate stuff. You two should probably stay out. Dangerous stuff in here, you understand.

Elina and Sarah: Aww. :(

Pholly: *looking a bit guilty* Look, girls, if you leave me be for a little while, Ill make you some gnome rock candy. Hows that?

Elina and Sarah: YAY! Candy.

Elina and Sarah bolt from the room, accidentally knocking over several bottles and flasks, which start to smoke.

Pholly: Aw, Shi-

SKUGGAFOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMM!!

Elina and Sarah: No fair, we wanted to watch you blow up!

Elina: You tricked us.

Sarah: Yeah, youre mean!

Pholly is coverd with soot and slight scorching. He coughs out a small cloud of smoke.

Pholly: Trust me, girls, if thats the worst that happens to me today.....


LATER

Mickey is giving Devon a physical, seeing as how Devon seemed to be in a state of physical and mental shock after his 'performance' for Marish.

Mickey: Well, Dev, other than some bruises and yarn-burns, you seem to be physically okay. Your head still kinda fuzzy?

Devon: Musta been the catnip.........

Elina and Sarah: HI!

Devon jumps about 2 feet into the air. Mickey doesnt seem to be phased.

Devon: Jeeez. I wish you two wouldnt do that to Uncle Dev. Mickey, got a potion or something for my nerves?

Mickey hands Devon a potion of Lesser Rum-restore.

Elina: Eww. I hate medicine. Mister Mickey, why does youre medicine taste so ucky?

Mickey: *under his breath* ohh, just wait about 10 years, it wont taste yucky then....

Sarah: What?

Mickey: Nothing. What can I do for you two sprites?

Elina: Mommy says that Uncle Dev is shocked. What shocked him?

Mickey: Oh, just something that happened to Dev that nobody expected.

Sarah: Whats that?

Devon: Well, you see, Marish really liked a song that your Uncle Dev knows. So she asked him over to play his song so she could hear it again.

Elina: What so shocking about a song?

Mickey: Well, besides the fact that he played it without screwing up.

Devon: Yeah, I was really lucky playing with Marish. I think I fumbled a bit on the bridge, though.

Elina and Sarah: Wow. *running off* Mommy, mom! Devon got shocked cause he got lucky playing with Marish!

Devon: Wait, no, thats not what I....

Lisa and Terra show up, some seriously impressive weapons in their hands.

Devon: This is gonna hurt, right?

Lisa and Terra nod.
Darakhoranon

08-25-06, 05:39 AM		Mickey: Well, Dev, other than some bruises and yarn-burns, you seem to be physically okay. Your head still kinda fuzzy?
...
Lisa and Terra show up, some seriously impressive weapons in their hands.

Devon: This is gonna hurt, right?

Lisa and Terra nod.


A looong time later, Mickey is giving Devon another physical.


Mickey:
Ok, now you don't seem to be physically okay anymore. Here, take this.


Mickey hands over a bottle labeled "Aereni Deathstar Wine".


Devon:
What the heck is that? Do you really expect me to drink THIS?

Mickey:
Yes, I do. It's originally from the Deathless' private wine cellars. Don't ask me how I got that, but I added a few ingredients. Short of this or a miracle I don't think anything will help you. And I don't think the gods will heal you out of mercy.

Devon:
Maybe if I sing for them...

Marish:
Meow!

Devon:
Whaaa! Ok, Mickey, I'll take it.


Devon gulps down the liquid, turns deathly pale (or should that be "deathlessly pale"?) and starts shaking. He obviously has trouble breathing but about 15 minutes later he manages to stand up. All his wounds are healed, but Devon now looks a little pale.


Devon:
I think I need something to drink.


He heads off to Erk's place.

At the same time in the captain's "office". Aurixirthos hands over a bag of gold.


Aurixirthos:
Here, this should cover the redshirts Ash and I fired. By the way, we may have lost a few crewmembers (that we never really needed in the first place), but since Norbaz took their remains to the kitchen, you should have saved on the rations...


Aurixirthos leaves the captain happily counting his money. Kithle is standing at the corner.


Kithle:
Why did you actually pay the captain's crazy "fine"?

Aurixirthos:
Why don't you read my mind?

Kithle:
I can't, you must know that. How did you do it?

Aurixirthos:
Long story. Let's just say before I had a kind of little falling out with a certain chamber, I had access to countless tomes, magic items and so on.

Kithle:
So you are...


Aurixirthos:
Yes, I am. However, to answer your original question: Major Creation...
Kaizer_Ryu

08-25-06, 10:02 AM		:D OOC: Wow. Two posts with my newest additions already. :D

IC:

Surrounded by a bevy of beautiful women, high quality booze, and several miles of distinctly crazy-person free beach, Jarlot enjoys his retirement.

Elina & Sarah: DADDY!!!!! *TACKLE*

Until now.

Jarlot: :eek: :twitch: :blink: :crazy: :OMG! :coolcthul :pumpkin:

Uprorious laughter erupts from behind him as his brain tries desperately to decide how much trouble he's in.

Terra: That was for leaving without telling us. :devil:

Lisa stands next to her, trying to look displeased but failing miserably.

Lisa: That was so mean! I *sniker* can't believe you got them to do that! *snicker*

Terra: The look on his face was priceless. I didn't know it was physically possible to do that.

Jarlot: So...so they're not...?

Lisa: Your's? Oh, heavens, no.

Jarlot: Thank gods. I didn't need another child support check draining my retirement fund.

Terra: Yeah, we heard about Marish.

Jarlot: Marish? Oh...yeah...Marish... :shifty:

The women that were fawning over him begin looking neglected.

Lisa: Well, I can see that you're "busy" and all, so we'll take our leave.

Terra: For now. :devil: Come on, girls, time to go.

Elina: Awwwwww...do we have to?

Terra: Yes, we do.

Sarah: He's WAY cooler than that ponce of a new Captain...

Jarlot: I like your kids. :D

Lisa: Thanks. We felt they had to meet you at least once.

Terra: *to the girls* We can even fly back, if you want.

Elina & Sarah: :w00t:

Terra spreads her wings and takes flight as Lisa and their daughters stand by. Reaching out with her tentacles, she grabs them gently and sets off toward the sky. (Get your mind out of the gutter. They're just another pair of hands. :P )

Elina: *GLEE*

Sarah: *GLEE*

Jarlot: Well, that's new...
rampant

08-25-06, 10:12 AM		Kithle - See what happens when you leave us alone.

Jarlot - No kithle, your someone elses headache now.

Kithle - No no, i'm just here to say that fobbing us off on that ametuer was so mean, congratulations. Unfortunatly I like my plaque, so one of the women is rigged to turn into an ooze monster next time you get frisky with her.

Jarlot - YOu bastard.

Kithle - Thats Magnificent bastard to you.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-25-06, 10:20 AM		Jarlot: Marish? Oh...yeah...Marish... :shifty:
OOcat: I may not be able to make the title of Magnificent Bastard, but that just means I'm free to be evil at my leisure.
Kithle - …one of the women is rigged to turn into an ooze monster next time you get frisky with her.
Caralot: Ooooooooh, a gelatinous half-elf…

Jarlot: It's not a forgone conclusion!

OOcat: Don't worry, only the half-ogre mage is.

Jarlot: Phew………:blink: :confused: Wait, what?

Ogress-mage: Oooooooooh, man meat!

OOC: :cookie: If you can remember where that's from.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-25-06, 11:03 AM		OOC: :cookie: If you can remember where that's from.OOC: The w**re house Krozen goes to.

Mmmmmm...:cookie:

IC:

Terra, Lisa, Elina, and Sarah stand in their demi-plane, which is currently forested. Satnak and Serene arrive shortly.

Satnak: What did you want to show us?

Terra: A training exercise. With where they were going to be living, as well as where they're going to school, we knew they needed to be able to fend for themselves.

Lisa: We'd like a critique, and maybe some pointers. You know the Island better than we do.

Terra: Ok, girls. Level 16.

The two quickly enter the forest and disappear. Their movements are barely perceptibe, even to Terra and Satnak.

Serene: Wow.

Lisa: I know. They've improved far faster than we expected. They've gotten up to Level 15 so far. We're trying for a new level today.

Satnak: What are these levels?

Terra: Difficulty settings, for lack of a better term. They try to avoid one of us for a set amount of time while performing a task. If they complete the task and remain hidden to the end, they win.

Satnak: Seems like they couldn't win against you. I'm guessing you willfully surpress some of your abilities.

Terra: Yeah. Ok, I'm going in. Be back in a half-hour. Maybe less.

Shifting to Snake form, Terra slithers silently into the woods.

Serene: What happens if they lose?

Lisa: Depends on how badly the do. Major mistakes are rewarded with skipping a meal.

Serene: That's a little harsh...

Lisa: The stomach is one of the best conduits of learning. Harsh, yes, but there are times when tough love is needed. We usually do this just before mealtime. A little added incentive.

Satnak: If that's the worst thing that happens to them, they can count themselves lucky.

Lisa: They're still children. We don't want to be any harder on them than is absolutely necessary.

(about 10 minutes later)

Terra: Got ya!

Elina: Aw, man!

Sarah: Busted!

Lisa: Let's go see.

After a short walk, they come across the three of them. Terra has tied the girls to a tree and is busy eating their lunch.

Terra: Oh, hi. Wanna join me?

Elina: No fair...

Sarah: So...hungry...

Terra: No whining. I know you two can do much better than that.

Satnak: What happened?

Terra: They stepped right over me, and they didn't even notice.

Lisa: *shakes her head at the girls* You're slacking off.

Elina: :bigeyes: :weep:

Sarah: Hungry...

OOC: :cookie: if you guess where I got this idea.
rampant

08-25-06, 11:26 AM		Satnak - You got this from one of my off-world comics didn't you.

Lisa - the one about the ninja-mages

Terra - Naruto or something like that.

Satnak - Good prep, although about that The evaluation team will be here soon.

Lisa - Already?

Satnak - Someone's been screwing with time.:rolleyes:

Terra - Yours too huh?

Serene - :confused:

Satnak - Part of it was setting up a solid portal, not just the one time effects that Illis, and Forbes can use. A big crossing like that tends to warp the cosmology while its being set up. HAve they given any thought about what they'd like to study, Tolos would kill to have these two trained as blade weavers, Levy has been going all out to find a Zerk to match me, and Kes just misses having me around to eat the chili.

Lisa - How... does everyone know?

Satnak - I had to file the paperwork. Most of them are on the admissions board, and Kes just runs the gossip rings.

Terra - Permanent portal?

Serene - We didn't know if you wanted them to live here or just come back on weekends or what, and since Satnnak was going to have to commute everyday anyway.

Lisa - Wait commute?

Satnak - Yeah I got a job as a conditioning coach, and I'll also be teaching some of the higher level energy manipulation classes.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-25-06, 11:42 AM		OOC: rampant gets the :cookie:

IC:

Terra: As far as what they want to study, we haven't really talked to them about it too much. If the evaluation team is coming, we'll do that sometime soon here. At least get the ball rolling. Though, with what we've seen, Sarah might make a great Berzerker.

Satnak: The Lycanthropy?

Lisa: Yeah. Both of them seem to have at least some residual effects of it, but it's rather pronounced in Sarah at times.

Terra: We won't know exactly how much it effects her till the Sacral seal fades. That's the seal that binds most of the raw, supernatural power. I was a little worried about sending them off before that happened, but if they can commute, that's perfect.
Gladius_Lucix

08-25-06, 12:05 PM		Liam sits in the lab, thinking about Lisa and Terra's kids.

Liam: They're going to be going to the Island, so the Ambiant Weirsan there must be at least half that of the Forgotten Freedom. What can I make for them? Maybe I should talk to Satnak and their mothers about it. They probably know what would the kids would need.

Liam checks the Weirsan map and sees that none of them are on the ship. Tinkering with a few knobs and dials on the display, he sets the device to inform him when they come back.

---
OOC: Kaizer or Rampant, whenever you're ready. I'm thinking some sort of Weirsan powered Training dummy, but one of you probably has a better idea.
rampant

08-25-06, 12:36 PM		Satnak - Jammers, the expensive ones are the jammers and the restrictors. They have to be consantly maintained, and replaced as they become too light for the students. Multi-setting units canbe made, but they are delicate and troublesome. Armor or something defensive in nature is always a good idea. Crystal is preferred material, especialy a living varient, easier to repair and upgrade. Though if they have any hobbies aside from being scamps you might want to get them something for those instead, because I can contract Naz'roth, and or Illis for the gear.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-25-06, 01:43 PM		OOC: I figured Kaizer would remember.
IC: 13: You know, with Terra and Lisa's kids grown so fast we didn't get to have any fun with their development. :(

Bunny: And I'm sure Terra and Lisa are very thankful for that. :bored:

13: I didn't mean it like that. It's just that kids growing up is one of the best…

Silver: …(read: most comically annoying)…

13: …parts of life.

OOcat: Okay, people, Terra and Lisa home-movie time.

Bunny: Wait, what?

OOcat: Since they were using the demi-plane my company created, I was able to weasel them out of moments of its time-line. It's like home-movies, only with surround-everything.

13: :w00t:

OOcat: Besides, there's always Lady and Marish's kittens. Heck, I'm surprised everyone is going through with that.
rampant

08-25-06, 02:15 PM		OOC: I decided it was a nice way to screw with people, kids are crazy, the children of these psychos should send Liam's Wiersan converter into shock.
Gladius_Lucix

08-25-06, 02:25 PM		OOC: I decided it was a nice way to screw with people, kids are crazy, the children of these psychos should send Liam's Wiersan converter into shock.
Terra and Lisa are two of the lower producers of Weirsan energy. If it can handle Kanatash, Pun-Pun, and Jarlot becoming a god (remember the first use of Weirsan?) it should be able to handle children. Right?
Is it a commentary on the posters here that all relationships are lesbian or furry (Aerith and Saberiel, Terra and Lisa, Serene and Satnak, Marish and anyone)?
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-25-06, 02:45 PM		OOC: Andrea and Norbaz, Devon and Silence, Kanatash and Caralot, Volrath and P/Y/R, Slip and Sa'vor, Naz'roth and Tara. Doog is gay. Terra and Lisa and Serene and Satnak are just in the spotlight a lot. As for "furry", it just happens that a lot of the non-furry crew doesn't have much of a sex-life, and we have quite a bit of furry crew.

Silver: You're all a bunch of horny males.

OOC: I'm not even going to bother. :whatsthis
LugWrench

08-25-06, 02:53 PM		OOC: To each their own, Glad. In this case, womanizing, boozing, pillaging.... You know, all the FUN stuff they never told you about.... We have become the people our parents warned us about. :D

New Character.

Kolyarut Inevitable 'MCP'

Fighter3/Ranger 3

MCP was recently charged with the objective of recon and inteligence gathering on the Forgotten Freedom. No, hes not here to spy on the crew, but rather to gain information on the various foibles of humanity in general. After the loss of the Inevitable now known as 'The Marshal', MCP's superiors (as he calls them) decided that more information on the nuances of humanoids is needed to prevent the corruption and loss of further Inevitables.
Upon reaching this conclusion, the higher ups cast about the multiverse, looking for the best conglomeration of races that evidenced the most common flaws, faults, weaknesses, and illogic of the 'lesser beings'. Almost instantly, they settled on the Forgotten Freedom. MCP has been aboad for only a few days, and still has much to learn.
He is currently asigned as chief of security (hey, if an inevitable wielding greatsword big enough to fillet a dragon isnt cut out for the job, who is?)and has already come to the conclustion that the crew is absolutely insane. Except for the two kids. He doesnt know what to make of them (there are no Inevitable children, after all), but has already labeled them as michevious, and Most Likely To Destroy the Universe.
Rose likes having the brute around, as it terrifies the redshirts into line. Also, MCP cant understand the concept of a paycheck, so the captain graceously holds MCPs pay 'just in case'. Yeah....right.....

There ya go, gang. A new mind, ready to be rendered unbalanced by the antics of the crew. Keep in mind, the guy still operates on the pricipal "If brute force doesnt solve your problem, you arent using enough" And a :cookie: to anyone who can tell me where that quote came from.
Charles Phipps

08-25-06, 02:58 PM		OOC: Aerith I actually think was involved with Jarlot over everyone else. But yes, the relationships onboard are the result of most of us being GAMERS

IC:

Captain Rose: Ketler, are you pondering what I'm pondering?

Ketler: Yes, but how do we get 1700 pounds of whipped cream and a live cockatrice?

Captain Rose: I was pondering world domination.

Ketler: Uhhhh.....so was I.

Captain Rose: I have to achieve what my uncle could never achieve.

Ketler: Get married and not screw it up.

Captain Rose: Something I'd ENJOY!

Ketler: In any case, you'll never surpass Captain Jarlot. He's the original and your the successor. It's like he's the Mario and you're the Luigi.

Captain Rose: I am not! Now where's my entirely green overalls and fake mustache to infiltrate Jarlot's house....

Ketler: Well you could umm....*whisper whisper whisper*

Captain Rose: AH HA! I'm glad I thought of that!

Ketler: Oh brother.

***

Lisa: Marish, have you seen Elina and Sarah?

Marish: *chomp* *chomp* *chew* MORE BEEF!

Lisa: Marish, pregnancy doesn't add THAT much weight.....

Marish: It was a Kenku! He was delicious!

Lisa: Ewwwww....

Marish: Oh and they were off being taught at Snogwarts

Lisa: What?

Marish: The Captain is on his 'I'm trying to be different from Jarlot, so I'll try world domination' so he set up a school of magic for the tykes.

Lisa: They're teaching my kids MAGIC?

Marish: Not just magic but the facts of life. They're currently learning religion from Michael...

Lisa: *ZOOM*

***

Saint Michael: Please turn to Flameccentricals 1:31

Elina and Sarah: Yes Father Michael.

Lisa: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooo!

Elina and Sarah: Hi mom.

Saint Michael: Greetings Lisa.

OOC: Aerith I actually think was involved with Jarlot over everyone else. But yes, the relationships onboard are the result of most of us being GAMERS

IC:

Captain Rose: Ketler, are you pondering what I'm pondering?

Ketler: Yes, but how do we get 1700 pounds of whipped cream and a live cockatrice?

Captain Rose: I was pondering world domination.

Ketler: Uhhhh.....so was I.

Captain Rose: I have to achieve what my uncle could never achieve.

Ketler: Get married and not screw it up.

Captain Rose: Something I'd ENJOY!

Ketler: In any case, you'll never surpass Captain Jarlot. He's the original and your the successor. It's like he's the Mario and you're the Luigi.

Captain Rose: I am not! Now where's my entirely green overalls and fake mustache to infiltrate Jarlot's house....

Ketler: Well you could umm....*whisper whisper whisper*

Captain Rose: AH HA! I'm glad I thought of that!

Ketler: Oh brother.

***

Lisa: Marish, have you seen Elina and Sarah?

Marish: *chomp* *chomp* *chew* MORE BEEF!

Lisa: Marish, pregnancy doesn't add THAT much weight.....

Marish: It was a Kenku! He was delicious!

Lisa: Ewwwww....

Marish: Oh and they were off being taught at Snogwarts

Lisa: What?

Marish: The Captain is on his 'I'm trying to be different from Jarlot, so I'll try world domination' so he set up a school of magic for the tykes.

Lisa: They're teaching my kids MAGIC?

Marish: Not just magic but the facts of life. They're currently learning religion from Michael...

Lisa: *ZOOM*


*Lisa blinks at the 4ft tall chibi version of herself with a giant hammer and wings*

Lisa: The Hell?

Saint Michael: I'm teaching your children about the Great Lycanthropic Purge.

Lisa: Michael...what's...happened to you?

Saint Michael: I have embraced the Flame, Dol Arrah, and Cuthbert! I am high on life!

Lisa: You entered the church...*squeak* for me?

Saint Michael: It was the only way to show my devotion!

Lisa: Ohhhhh poor Michael.

Saint Michael: Well at least you're happy...even though your marriage to Terra is invalidated by the Treaty of Thronehold.

Lisa: Wait..what?
rampant

08-25-06, 03:01 PM		OORapant - MUst...Not...Vaporize...crew. All...Instincts...screaming...to...exter minate...inevitables. Self narration...not helping.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

08-25-06, 03:12 PM		(occ: Charles posted while I was typing, assume this happened before Saint Michael's class please)

Ash notises Saint Michael praying on the deck. his expression spreading into a suprisingly evil grin for a beak. He begins to stalk closer, stealthy as smoke.

Saint Michael "-and grant me the streght to make amends, to go forth boldly and be not tempted into sin or debachery in your name that I might me at last at peace-"

Ash, Ihh [Now who could posibly mess with this? :schemes: ]
In a pitch perfect imatation of Lisa's voice, tones warm and tender .Directly into his ear.
"Hiya, did you miss me?"

Saint Michael "Ahhhhhh! Lustfull thoughts beset me. I must be scorged!" begins slaming his face hard off his hammer.

Ash: :evillaugh Ihh [Only thing that could make this better is if he was on fire... Hmmm. Best not to :( . Now if I could only find a good Voice to screw with Rose the wanabe...]
Gladius_Lucix

08-25-06, 03:32 PM		While waiting for the new family to return, Liam does some brainstorming for some new projects to work on. He notes down every idea as it comes to him.

OOGladius: I see you took my advice on the Duct Tape Golem.

Liam: *still taking notes* Loosely. I figured the way I did it would be easier.

OOGladius: Yeah, I can see that. Can I see what you're scribbling?

Liam: It's just ideas for new Weirsan gadgetry. I can't think of anything useful.

OOGladius: Weren't you originally trying to figure out how to use Weirsan to fill up an artificer's Craft Reserve?

Liam: Yes, but I thought it would be too dangerous.

OOGladius: Just do what everyone does on my side of the 4th wall: throw a disclaimer on it in fine print.

Liam: I'd rather not, anyway.

OOGladius: Fine. I'll leave you to your work.

OOGladius poofs out and Liam returns to his notes.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-25-06, 04:06 PM		Saint Michael: Well at least you're happy...even though your marriage to Terra is invalidated by the Treaty of Thronehold.
Bunny: Well, you know what that means.

13: Retroactively insert realllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll llly tiny writing that invalidates what Michael just said?

Bunny: I was thinking massive killing spree involving anyone who knows of this loophole.

13: *nods* Less paperwork.

Silver: Why would anyone care by now if their marriage is legal? This is the FF, marriage is just an excuse to throw a party.

Bunny: Hmmmm, he's teaching them about the great Lycanthropic Purge? Why don't we provide him with a teaching demonstration? :devil:
********
Saint Michael: Oh, greeting Weylin, what brings you—why are you chaning into a wolf? Why-why are you looking at me like that—Now, now, lets not get violent her—AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!! WHY ARE YOU PIERCING MY PURE UNTAINTED FLESH WITH YOUR SUPERNATURAL DISEASE-SPREADING FANGS?!

Bunny: And that, class, is what the purge basically looked like.

Sarah: Cool!

Saint Michael: MY SPLEEN! YOU JUST RIPPED IT OUT AND THREW IT AWAY!

Spleen-eater: If you're not going to finish that…

Sarah: I wanna learn to do that!

Lisa: I thought you were against non-mortal violence.

Bunny: :bored: Who says I'm going to let him live?

Saint Michael: AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!! YOU'VE RIPPED OUT MY STILL-BEATING HEART AND ARE NOWING SHOWING IT TO ME BEFORE I—*gurk*
Charles Phipps

08-25-06, 04:30 PM		Saint Michael: Oh thank god, you managed to get to the Holy Duct tape in time Captain Rose.

Rose: Good, now that you're alright.

*PIMP SLAP*

Rose: CLERICS ARE NOT ALLOWED TO GET INJURED.

Lisa: What kind of...

Rose: Long story Lisa, all we have to do is hunt down and kill your spouse that you don't know about.

Saint Michael: Then I shall marry you again to your lover.

Sarah: Grrrr..

Rose: *tosses her a bone*

Sarah: *catches it in her mouth*

Lisa: Do NOT play with my children like that.

Rose: Oh please, like they don't like it.

*scratches behind Elina's ears*

Rose: Let's face it, the ONLY way they're going to elect a drunken good-timing bard like myself High King is if there's a war or I change my last name to Clinton. Since I hate bureaucracy, its the War.

Lisa: You cannot reingnite the last War!

Rose: Oh like it's the first war I've ever ignited.

Saint Michael: Tis true according to the holy canon....

***

Flamekeep

Bishop Kronzen Senior: Who the Hell stole all of the holy relics made of gold, silver, and platnium from our vaults!?

Brother Rose in Brown Robes: Ummmm...Lycanthropes.

Bishop Kronzen Senior: What's all that bulg under your robes?

Brother Rose in Brown Robes: Tumors...from....Lycanthropy bites.

Bishop Kronzen Senior: Wouldn't that make you a Lycanthrope and not give you tumors?

Brother Rose in Brown Robes: Ummm...OH CRAP! LOOK A WEREWOLF IS EATING A FLAME FOLLOWING BABY!

Bishop Kronzen Senior: What?

*looks away*

*Rose runs away*

Brother Rose in Brown Robes: Yoink!

***

Saint Michael: And that's how the Lycanthrope purge started.

Lisa: bull****

Rose: You'd be surprised how much mayhem I've caused.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

08-25-06, 04:30 PM		Ash "Knew I should have set him on fire, but nooo. :weep: "
urial angel of death

08-25-06, 04:48 PM		Volrath is in his room trying to get a telepathic message through to P/Y/R. Elina and Sarah burst into the room.

Elina and Sarah: UnlceVolrathcanyouanswersomeofourquestio nscauseweneedanswersreallyfast.

Volrath: Slowwer and one at a time.

Elina: Well, me and Sarah had a question. We thought you would know because you're always creating new creatures. Where do babies come from?

Volrath: It all starts with...

Several mintues later.

The girls are sitting on the floor with horrified expretions on their faces.

Volrath: ...and that's the miracle of conception, or atleast how it happened for your parents. For most people it involves more saliva.

Elina and Sarah: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

The girls run screaming from the room.

Volrath: It's better that I tell them now, than their parents when they're old enough.
LugWrench

08-25-06, 05:26 PM		OOc: Volrath, yer a cold bastard, ya know that? I wonder if theres some kind of reward we can give ya. Wait, I know what it is. "Contributing to the delinquency of a pair of minors." :P
urial angel of death

08-25-06, 05:28 PM		OOC: What do they called the award winners of American Idol get? ;)
Charles Phipps

08-25-06, 07:00 PM		Elina: Hey Captain Rose.

*Elina walks up to Rose crouched in a corner*

Rose: Yes child?

*Rose gets up and immediately puts what he was smoking*

Elina: I was curious....

Rose: Yes?

Elina: Uncle Michael says that the Church of the Silver Flame that mommy worships hates Lycanthropes...

Rose: Yes child.

Elina: Yet, me and Sarah are part-Lycanthrope.

Rose: Uh huh.

Elina: So does that mean Mommy hates us?

Rose: Why come to me about this?

Elina: Well I heard you're a bard and mommy Terra says that while they're usually useless, drunken, fools that would sell their mother for a silver piece...

Rose: True thus far.

Elina: They usually have a lot of wisdom.

Rose: Well three out of four isn't bad.

Elina: So could you tell us what the case is.

Rose: Well the first thing you've got to understand is that the Church of the Silver flame doesn't hate you because you're lycanthropes.

Elina: oh *whew*

Rose: It hates you because you're women first.

Elina: :eek:

Rose: You see, the Church heirarchy is composed of a bunch of sad old men whom never got any in high school.

Aerith On High: Or college.

Rose: Thank you Goddess and thus decide to take it on attractive women. Especially women whom like to have fun like your mommies.

Elina: :uh-huh:

Rose: Thus, the church makes a deliberate effort to outlaw anything remotely fun along with any religion that is also permissive to things fun.

Saint Michael: SMOKING!

*chases Ketler with a board with a nail in it*

Rose: Thus, you as a young and happy magical girl are pretty much the ultimate target for the Church. They're already sharpening knives really. Expect the Thranish Inquisition at any point.

***

Cardinal Biggles: CURSES! THEY KNOW WE'RE COMING!

***

Elina: I....but why would they have Pontiff Jaela then?

Rose: Ah, alas you don't want to know what they have planned for Pontiff Jaela.

Elina: :mymy:

Rose: So no, your mommy doesn't hate you. Your mommy is a messed up mass of guilt and contradictory impulses whom hates herself.

*pets Elina's head and smiles*

Rose: Remember, smoking will make you cool and boys will like you if you sleep with them. Wait until your at least able to put on a bra first though. I want to be a responsible elder in my suggestion.

*Elina wanders off*

Doog: Lisa will kill you only if Terra doesn't get there first.

Rose: Then my work as an ordained Deacon of the Traveller is done.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

08-25-06, 07:12 PM		Chanse "Ah, the new captain, I was hoping to see you. I have a sugestion that may prove enriching, for both of us."

Rose "Who are you and what is it?"

Chanse "Ah yes, Im forgetting my manners. Random, Chanse Random. Chayos incarnate, master theive, ocasional assasin, now a pirate untill something else occurs to me."

Rose "and this sugestion?"

Chanse "I know where an airship carrying Aundar gold can be found. Hold is full of it. Its guarded, but nothing we cant handle. Id rased the matter with your predesessor, but nothing came of it. Oh and one thing. When we do this, the capatin is mine. Old score to setle."

Rose "I'll concider it, now I must be off."

Chanse "Well you cant keep a mellon waiting"

Rose "No, you cant- wait thats not what I meant" :eek:

( Chanse Random, Changling Incrnate 20, CN. A cunning savy manipulator with a heavy cross bow. Traned as an assain under as yet unrevealed circomstances. his reasons for being on the ship seem deeper than he says. What is known is he has an uncany ability to warp probiblility and matters of luck. [For anime fans amoung you wright him as Lupin the 3rd with Jiggen's aim and a love of gratuitous chayos] )
Charles Phipps

08-25-06, 07:19 PM		Rose: Oddly, I was based on Lupin.

Ketler: I guess you can't be the only one of anything can you Rose.

Rose *cuts rope*

Ketler: HA! I removed all the chandeliers above the deck!

*a trap door opens up under Ketler and he goes flying downward*

***

flashback to the first meeting of Rose and Lisa

Rose: Koneechewa! Which is Sarlonan for....HIYA BABES!

Lisa: Who are you? Where is Jarlot?

Terra: Oh hell, its you.

Lisa: You know this person?

Terra: You think I causally stepped from Druidism to Drugs? He's a former partner in crime until he ate us out of profits and I fired his ass.

Rose: Correction, I chose to leave you to pursue other opportunities.

Terra: WITH my cashbox.

Rose: Suffice to say, Uncle Jarlot left me in charge and I'm terribly happy to have you with us.

Terra: Just remember Rose, I have a sickle and know how to make a called shot to the groin.

Rose: You wound me Terra.

Terra: Only if I miss.
rampant

08-25-06, 07:29 PM		Death Paper - I'm no expert on humanoids but I'm pretty sure that isn't right.

Elina - Why are you squirrels always spying on us?

Death Paper - So Terra will let us eat of her bird feeders.

Sarah - We know the captain is an idiot, but who else could we ask? Aunt Satnak knows less about the Flame thing than we do.

Elina - and Uncle Volrath just starts raving incoherrently.

Death Paper - Maybe my dad would know.

-----------------

Death paper - yo pops you in here? Terra and lisa's kits have some questions.

Kithle - Honestly does the plaque say sage? ok you to trouble makers whats up.

Elina - why does the silver flame hate us?

Sarah - and does that mean that momma hates us?

Kithle - :doh: Ok first things first. Your mother does indeed worshipthe silver flame as a manifestation of good and light. Now the flame itself and its ideals are the inspiration for a poweful organization called the Church of the Silver Flame. Your mother was once a Paladin Knight of this church until coming here. She still draws faith and power from the Flame as a symbol and as an ideal, but she is no longer officialy associated with the Church. In the past the Church was resposible for horendous atrociteis known as purges against shapeshifters and weres in particular. They are also known for exorcising demons. Even today the organization contains corrupt or overzealous individuals who will do anything to achieve their goals. Many parts of the organization still hate and fear shape shifters. Your mother lisa never really had a problem with Shapeshifters, i mean she married a druid for crying out loud. From now don't go to the captain for advice. When he isn't an idiot he's up to something. Now scat your parents are pinging me rather incessently.
urial angel of death

08-25-06, 07:32 PM		The Sarah is once again in Volrath's room. This time there is insence burning everywhere and she is dressed in black and purple robes.

Volrath: Now repeat after me Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn

Sarah: Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl ftaghn

Volrath: No, no, no it's fhtagn. It's ruined now. Do you know what this means.

Sarah: *shakes her head*

Volrath: You don't get any chocolate.

Sarah: No chocolate. :eek:

Volrath: Not only that but I'm going to eat it right in front of you.

Volrath begins to eat a chocolate bar, very, very, slowly.

Sarah: NNNNNNNOOOOO!!! :weep:
Charles Phipps

08-25-06, 08:31 PM		*Captain Rose plays a beautfiul tune on his mandoline with flute in mouth plus jingling shoes before a large audience of Sharn citizens on the deck sitting under a banner that says "Free Concert for the Benefit of Cog's citizens*

Click here to listen to the tune: http://www.thebardstale.com/soundtrack%5Cheres%20to%20the%20bard%20-%20title%20mix.mp3

Audience: *slowly starts to fall asleep due to the sleep spell hidden in the tune*

Captain Rose: *pulls out battle ax* Now to kill them all and take their stuff.

Elina: Uncle Rose!

Captain Rose: Oh hell.

Elina: Kithle said that the Flame doesn't hate us and that you're an idiot.

Captain Rose: What did he say...

Elina: The corrupt clergy does.

Jarlot as a glowing luminious figure: So what Rose told you was true....from a certain point of view.

Captain Rose: Obi-Jarlot!

Elina: Are you dead?

Jarlot as a glowing luminous figure: No, I'm just visiting and decided to wear luminous paint.

Captain Rose: In any case, young padawans, you'll find many of the truths we bards cling to depend greatly on your own perspective.

Elina: Ummm okay.

Captain Rose: So. any other questions?

Elina: Could you tell us a bit about this world? We're new here and need to know a bit more about it.

Captain Rose: Very well. Jarlot, mind handling the slaughter of the audience?

Jarlot Ghost: Sure *takes battle ax and starts to get to work with hidious chopping sounds while Rose talks*

Elina: Ummmm....

*is splattered with a little blood the girl is*

Captain Rose: There are several types of people in this world Elina. Fighters, Magic Users, Rogues, and what I call "The Crap Classes" along with Mooks. The above three are divided into numerous subclasses such as Fighters, Barbarians, Rangers, and Paladins like your mommy.

Elina: I...see.

Captain Rose: Mooks make up the majority of the world's population. They are a collection of mostly ugly looking races that live in savage and underpriviledged locations that are festering cesspools of crime or villainy.

Elina: Because they're disadvantaged and poor?

Captain Rose: No, because they're innately evil. There's the OCCASIONAL exception that makes you hesitant about slaughtering a few Orc cubs here and there but for the most part they'll kill you as soon as look at you.

Elina: Oh my.

Captain Rose: The mooks form the majority of the world's economy as they exist to siege castles, towns, and the like then burn them into the ground in order to inhabit their ruins as opposed to the bustling cities they once were. Then they horde this wealth in treasure chests. Occasionally magic items too, that they never use. Often they will spend their entire lives guarding these objects in 10 by 10 rooms.

Elina: Why?

Captain Rose: Probably some sort of religious function. Now, the majority of people in the Crap Classes. The commoners, experts, warriors, and aristocrats, exist solely to sit around and b*** about the mooks. They are completely helpless against these threats even if they ostenibly have warriors at their call. 500 warriors in a Keep on The Borderlands will never muster as much courage to clean out a Cavern of Chaos as a Fighter, Thief, Bard, and Cleric might.

Elina: How awful.

Captain Rose: Now, the Fighter, Magic User, and Rogues exist for the purpose of killing things and taking their stuff.

Elina: Sounds like they're psychotic.

Captain Rose: I prefer the word driven. The accumulation of loot and the "Great Score" is a holy act as any paladin will tell you. The Great Score is sacred to the Gods above the Gods for it gives a person the ability to speak better at diplomacy, learn more about the world, and tell better lies amongst other skills solely seemingly from activities of mindless rampage. Thus, an experienced Ranger will probably be far better than a person training in libraries his entire life.

Elina: I probably should take notes.

Captain Rose: Now while religions are ostenibly about ethics and dogma. In truth, they are actually about healing and accumulating more magical power via spells. The same for Bards whom you'd think would be mostly interested in storytelling than slaughter.

Elina: So is that why the Forgotten Freedom exists?

Captain Rose: Yes, as a commune to the enlightenment achieved by increasing one's score through ritual murder and the acculation of loot.

Elina: What do you think Sarah?

*She wears a Eye on a Pointy hat and long robes*

Sarah: IA! Cthulhu!
Charles Phipps

08-25-06, 08:40 PM		Sarah: NNNNNNNOOOOO!!! :weep:

I felt the need to state this was one of the funniest moments in the entire campaign.
rampant

08-25-06, 09:13 PM		Satnak - OI 'ficers get in here and do something useful.

Ketler - Oh crap she found us.

Allen - *gulp*

Naz'roth - What blue prints!? *anime sweat drop*

------------------------

Terrek - Yes daughter.

Serene - Satnak is having a permanent portal to the island set up, and she says we need artificers, and mage-smiths to set up this end. She wanted me to ask if you would help willingly.

Terrek - and if i don't?

Serene - I don't think she'd do anything overt, but she did threaghten to take you of her contractors list.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-25-06, 09:39 PM		OOC: You people - especially you, Charles Phipps - are horrible, awful people to warp my little girls while I'm busy at work. :P Thus, the following is entirely warrented.

IC:

*HORRIBLE BLOODY VENGEANCE*

Elina & Sarah: :OMG! :OMG! :OMG!

Rose: *gurgle* *sputter* *cough*

Terra: THAT was for screwing with my kids. I won't hold back next time.

Elina: You were HOLDING BACK?!?! The only reason he's not dead 500 times over is because he's the Captain, therefore immortal!

Sarah: I still can't believe where you stuck his mandolin...

Terra: Girls, what did we say about talking to idiots?

Elina: Take everything they say with a grain of salt.

Sarah: Then make fun of them.

Terra: Good.

Saint Michael: Do not fill my deciples heads with such heathenous prattle! It's time for their lesson.

Terra: *to the girls* And what do we do with idiots who are also religious zealots?

Elina: :devil:

Sarah: :plotting:

Saint Michael: :mymy: What...what are you looking at me like that for...? *anime sweatdrop*

Terra: Now would be a good time to run.

Saint Michael: But I- AUGH! MY EYE! WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY EYE?! NO, NOT THERE! AAAAAHHHHH! I NEED THAT ARM! NO, DON'T DO THA-YEAAAAAHHH!!!

Several blood-letting minutes later.

Saint Michael: Dol Arrah, take me...

Terra: Well done. However, you also have to remember to not kill them. It's not their fault they were born idiots...most of the time. Elina, if you would.

Elina heals Micheal as Terra puts Rose back together.

Terra: One last lesson. After a bout of vengeance like this, they no doubt have lost quite a lot of blood. Which means...

Sarah: They can't hold their alcohol?

Terra: Absolutely correct. You know what to do.

After a few more minutes, Rose and Michael are stupefyingly drunk off less than one pint in total.

Terra: When they wake up, they'll have a hangover akin to ripping out your own eyesockets and shoving them back into place through your nose while swallowing liquid keelhaul mixed with glass shards.

Elina: Why go to all this trouble?

Terra: Vengeance must serve as a lesson. The more, and longer, that it hurts, the less likely they'll try it again.

Elina & Sarah: Ooooooohhhhhhh...

Terra: Though, as far as these idiots are concerned, I have no doubt they'll try again soon enough.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-25-06, 10:11 PM		MUCH later, after the Captain has recovered.

Rose: You are guilty of a direct assault against the Captain. Such insubordination must be punished by LIQUID KEELHAUL. :evillaugh

Rose pulls a bottle from the case and hand it to Terra. Taking it, she also grabs the entire case.

Terra: Watch and learn, boy. I've been through childbirth. This is nothing.

She proceeds to chug the entire 24 pack in less than 5 minutes.

Rose: :mymy: :shocked: :OMG!

Terra: Mmmm...tangy. Well, if we're done here, my family and I have something to discuss. *walks away humming happily*

Rose: Why are all the women who can do that taken or lesbians? :weep:
Charles Phipps

08-25-06, 10:46 PM		Saint Michael: I'm again sorry Captain.

Rose: WHY THE HELL IS IT THAT EVERY TIME I NEED HEALING, YOU'RE THE PERSON EQUALLY INJURED!

Saint Michael: One might look at this as a way to reflect on the mysterious ways of the gods.

Rose: Right, WHATEVER.....

Mickey: That'll be another 300gp for those non-alcoholic cherry flavored healing potions you've been chugging.

Rose: FINE.

Saint Michael: Methinks he may have hired me more for cheap healing than spiritual advice Brother Mickey.

Mickey: Again, Michael, drop the Norse act or I'm not speaking with you.

Terra: ROSEEEEEEE!

*she smacks open the door to the captain's quarters*

Rose: Yes sweet Druidess?

Terra: Where the Hell is Lisa!?

Rose: I imagine, she's been teleported to Valenar by Andrea in order to deal with the Treaty of Thronehold business.

Terra: Bull-shavit! There's no way in Hell that she would have left without talking to me first UNLESS you were involved.

Rose: You think I have that kind of persuasive ability?

Terra: You persuaded me to all sorts of things I regret.

Rose: Touche. No, actually I didn't. Lisa is still a paladin of the Silver Flame Terra. She went on her own. I also deeply want to KEEP Lisa away from Valenar.

Saint Michael: She talked with me about it. I agreed to help her go.

Terra: DAMN YOU MICHAEL! WHY!?

Saint Michael: Because Lisa would have never forgiven herself if she didn't get this resolved. I still love Lisa, even though she'll never return my affection. She doesn't want anyone looking at her marriage as a lie and she doesn't want anyone hurt or killed because of it.

Terra: URRR.

Rose: Don't worry, I've already turned the ship around in order to get her back. I expect she's going to end up imprisoned though.

Terra: What the hell aren't you telling me?

Rose: Remember the old alliance which produced the Dragonmarked Half-Elven houses? That's the kind of compact which produced me from the alliance with Karrnath. Blood ties are fanatically important to elves. Lisa's sutor is a very bad man in Prince Kaine. Prince Kaine kidnapped my wife....my first and dearest one...and has kept her in prison for years so he could use it as an excuse to annex her properties without interference. Lisa will probably be forced by innocents imperiled at sword point to do what he says. He'll then murder her and blame one of the other factions of the country as an excuse to go to war.

Terra: :blink:

Rose: I'd kill him but my father...my real father....was ten times the swordsman that he was. A bondsmen of Jarlots and Kaine killed him in cold blood. I was married as a child to Zella but she was my closest friend as a child. I *WILL* get her back and I *WILL* see your wife safely back to you. However, don't you DARE blame this on me. You chose to marry a do-gooder, its her doing when she goes off to do good.

Michael: I'm sorry, I'll die if I have to in order to get her back.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-25-06, 11:02 PM		Elina: Why did Momma leave?

Sarah: Does she not like us anymore?

Terra: No, no. You two should know better than that. She loves you both with all her heart. This whole situation is...complicated. Momma feels that she needs to take care of this on her own.

Elina: But why?! :weep:

Terra: You can ask her that once we help her.

Sarah: Is Momma gonna be ok?

Terra: So long as I have anything to say about it. But, if you want to help, you have to promise me that you won't do anything rash. Momma may be strong, but she doesn't want to hurt anyone not at fault. She's stronger in that regard than I am.
urial angel of death

08-25-06, 11:11 PM		Volrath: I will help you get her back. After all there is some unfinished business I have to deal with. It has to do with a certain friend of our's, Terra.

Terra: You don't mean!

Volrath: Why yes, yes I do.

OOC: Kaizer, Rei this guy is two battles away for you. Rei if you must ask yes this is the one.
Charles Phipps

08-25-06, 11:19 PM		In a Valenar Forrest

Count Evillo: Your princess is quite a winning creature. A trifle simple, perhaps. Her appeal is undeniable.

Prince Kaine of the Valenar: I know, the people are quite taken with her. It's odd, but when I hired the Cardinal to have her murdered by sending her on the impossible quest to the Forgotten Freedom, I thought that was clever. But it's going to be so much more moving when I strangle her on our wedding night. Once Karrnath is blamed, the nation will truly be outraged - they'll demand we go to war.

Count Evillo: [snickers, then examines a huge tree] Now where is that secret knot? It's impossible to find...

[he finds it and the tree opens to reveal a hidden passage]

Count Evillo: Ah. Are you coming down into the pit? Lisa has got her strength back. I'm starting her on the machine tonight.

Prince Kaine: [sincerely] Tyrone, you know how much I love watching you work, but I've got my country's 10th anniversary to plan, my wedding to arrange, my wife to murder and Karrnath to frame for it; I'm swamped.

Count Evillo: Get some rest. If you haven't got your health, then you haven't got anything.

***

In the Dungeon of the Valenar

Lisa: DAMN YOU TO HELL!

Count Evillo: Already there, in any case, this machine will brainwash your pitiful paladin's mind with all manner of EVIL thoughts.

Lisa: NEVER!

Count Evillo: Believe me child, when the machine is done with you. You won't know your wife from the Prince...and that's a big change.

OOC: Special thanks to the Princess Bride for tonight's game's inspiration.

Please no one, interfere with her imprisonment.
urial angel of death

08-25-06, 11:30 PM		A man wearing a white smiling mask and black outfit enters the room.

masked man: I am here to relieve you of your duties for now.

Count Evillo: What do you mean?

masked man: I am the new torturer I am here for practice. Don't worry you will take over later for actually breaking her. Besides every prisoner must have atleast two torturers to prevent bribery.

Count Evillo: Very well. I take my leave.

Count Evillo walks up the staircase and leaves the pit.

Lisa: Is that you?

The masked man puts a finger over his mouth slit and begins tinkering with the machines inner part.
rampant

08-25-06, 11:37 PM		Satnak - Explain why I'm not allow to simply vaporize everyone in the way.

Serene - Satnak!:mad:

Satnak - Fine, but someone suffers for this, and where the Bloody Mol is my cat?

Serene - Why don't you go see how the guys are doing on the portal.

Satnak - Fine!
-exit-

Serene - Something must be keeping her from using the bracelets Satnak got you for the wedding.

Terre - :embarrass hehe...

Serene - Now you know why I sent her accross the ship to the portal room.
Sir Elton

08-26-06, 12:46 AM		Halharath was traveling along, walking east. He was carrying flowers when he looked up. There it was, the Forgotten Freedom. My, what an interesting ship, he thought to himself. I wonder. Hmmm. Naw. He wouldn't be on that ship, it's useless for him to be on that ship. Halharath continued walking.

As he walked, he wondered. It's been a long time. Too long. Hal stopped and found the curtain of rolling grey dead mist that marked the boundary of the Mournland. A small breeze had just moved a small tuft of his hair. He sat down, and a tear came to his eye.

Draj, Sword, it's a been a long time since we've adventured in Cyre, he thought to himself. I miss you both, casualties of a war that shouldn't have been fought. If there was any way to reverse what has been done, I would do so. Halharath set the flowers down before the rolling mists. Halharath had a family, a real family of a brother and what ever Draj decided to be.

Halharath looked up at the Forgotten Freedom. That is an interesting ship. At that point, a shifter girl appeared beside him and Halharath, whose physiology is still human, jumped in fright. "WHO IN SHAVARATH ARE YOU!" Hal screamed.

"Hi, I'm Marish," the Shifter girl said.

"Hi, I'm Halharath," Halharath said. He then quickly scanned her thoughts. "And I'm unavailable."
Charles Phipps

08-26-06, 06:01 AM		Prince Kaine: How has the brainwashing worked?

Count Evillo: As long as the Machine is working properly, she's pure evil forever. Even without it, I've reinforced the transformation of her mind with mind control spells of the finest sort.

Princess Lisa: I obey.

Prince Kaine: Let's test it.

*A young peasant boy is brought in*

Prince Kaine: Kill him.

Princess Lisa: I....must....

Prince Kaine: It seems rather underpowered.

Count Evillo: A flaw in formula perhaps. I'll experiment further.

Princess Lisa: KILL.

*The paladin then ran through the innocent boy as she smiled*

Prince Kaine: Excellent.

***

The Forgotten Freedom

Rose: Well we're above Valenar land. Land of Horses, Plains, Elves, Horses, Plaints, Elves, Horses, did I mention Horses? Oh and the occasional forgotten human serf.

Erin: So we're going to rescue mommy?

Rose: Yes and hopefully recieve a big cut of your mommy's drug business for it!

*Is hit by a Flaming Sphere*

Rose: AH! MY LIFE IS PAIN!

Erin: You know mommy, that traumatizes me just as much.

Rose: *rolling on the ground* In any case *jumps up* my only request is that people leave me to kill Prince Kaine.

Ketler: Do you honestly believe we can't just walk up and do that?

Rose: Why? Does anyone object to killing the 500 or 600 innocent soldiers and nobles willing to lay down their lives for him?

Ketler: No.

Saint Michael: Lisa would.

Rose: DAMNIT! Okay, stealth infiltration it is.

***

Dungeon Cell

*Lisa is crying even as she is thrown into the dungeon cell with a attractive and Disney-esque princess*

Zella: Oh hi, you must be my fellow brainwashed victim!

Lisa: The hell?

Zella: Long story! Nice to meetcha!
cypher_zero

08-26-06, 08:04 AM		Terrek and Sa'vor: Umm... Would mass slaughter of them anyways be an option?

Terrek: That's and awful lot of souls... I'm kinda hungry...
.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

08-26-06, 08:13 AM		Ash "Lady Terra, please alow me to offer my aid in this matter, it would be my pleasure to see you and your paramour reunited."

Terra "And how might you help?"

Ash "Why how can I not? There is no lock that can stand aginst my skill, no wall that might bar my way. No foe who fears the caress of conflageration who will not fall before my flames. I grow weary of the simple incineration of redshirts, I crave a chalenge and in my long seclusion I have cme to vew you and certain others as parts of my roost. I have been exiled once before, it made me value comrades all the more."

Rose "Very noble of you"

Ash "Though there are some exeptions" Burn!

Rose "Ahhhh the flames!"

Terra "I see, well I'll bear you in mind."
Gladius_Lucix

08-26-06, 08:20 AM		Liam walks up on deck carrying just a Staff of Holding (hold person, monster, and mass) and a Weirsan reciever.

Liam: I'm ready to go.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-26-06, 08:24 AM		OOcat: :banghead: Usless brain. Can't think of a single thing to write.

Bunny: You could alwasy comment on how useless you are to a storyline. :P

Silver: You know, the usual.

OOcat: There has to be something.

13: Let's face it: you can't come up with a winning strategy. Everyone else does that. OOKaizer, OOCharles, OOrampant, etc. They're all better than you.

OOcat: OOKaizer………Zella……………:lightbulb :devil:

Rose: Why are you looking at me like—Aiyah!

Rose is now dressed in green.

Rose: Hah! Yah!…………Arrrrggh!

13: Appropriate to the setting and shuts him up.

OOcat: Plus with the ocarina he can still be a bard. Not enough, though.……………Lisa……………………:lightbulb

Caralot: Terra? We have a problem.

Terra: Related to Lisa?

Caralot: Weylin went after her. I've told her how ineffectual his lycanthropic powers are, and he doesn't have much else to rely on.

OOC: Also, Erk and a lot of his employees have extensive infiltration training by now because they go on so many MI-style missions with Erk (the company just disavows any knowledges of their activities afterwards).
Lord Kale Fangblade

08-26-06, 09:51 AM		Deep in Prince Kaine's dungeons an ordinary gaurd walks down the corridor towards the cells. The other two give him a dark look

Gaurd 2: What are you doing in here?

Gaurd 1: Im bringing the prisoners their lunch.

Gaurd 3: *looks at him sternly* They've just had lunch.

Gaurd 1: Well, I've just been ordered to give them lunch, and if your going to file a complaint you know i could go completly over your heads about how you two are smokeing while on duty. you know how the boss hates smokeing.

Gaurd 2: *shudders* all those.... pamphlets...

Gaurd 1: now why dont you two just leave. very quickly. i'll take over from here.

Gaurd 3: yeah... sure. yeah, we'll just leave.

They both scarper. Gaurd 1 walks into Lisa's cell carrying lunch.

Lisa: you know i could just snap your neck and escape.

Gaurd 1: I know. but then you'll have to get past the several hundred gaurds, that would involve slaughter. and paladins cant do that. (telepathicaly in Sa'vors voice) The others will be here soon, luckily i was born near here so i know this area very well.

Lisa: perhaps i could do that anyway. (T) Why cant you just break me out now?

Gaurd 1: your a paladin you cant do that. (T) Because the captains placed a dib on the big bad guy, oh and theres an anti-magic field around here, as well as several wards and anticipate teleportation.

Lisa: *begins eating* So how can you use telepathy?

Gaurd 1: *Walking out of the cell.* theres a transponder crystal under the plate, its connected to a system that Naz'roth is using to keep contact between the group. he's boosting the signal.

Lisa: Whats the plan then?

Sa'vor: Well, when Prince Kaine's comes just tell him that im an infiltrator trying to free you. They kill me and think they've won. then we iniciate the true plan...
rampant

08-26-06, 10:58 AM		Satnak Is pacing the ship.

Satnak - Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Elina - Why is aunt Satnak so angry?

Serene - Because she revels in battle, and all this sneaking around is preventing her from fighting.

Sarah - Whys is it doing that?

Serene - Satnak is trained to fight, she ...she enjoys combat. On the other hand She's smart enough to know that going on a rampage will just alert the enemy to the fact that we are here and endanger the rescue.

Satnak - Rip, tear, shred, kill, maim, destroy
Kaizer_Ryu

08-26-06, 11:48 AM		Terra: Rose, there's some things I'd like to mention to you.

Rose: Yeah?

Terra: First off, you're already getting a rather large cut of my profits as per the contract I signed with your predecessor.

Rose: How much?

Terra: 30% after taxes, tithes, and other expenses.

Rose: Which adds up to...?

Terra: Roughly 40 million GP a year.

Rose: :OMG! :OMG! :drool:

Kanatash: (telepathically) But...you don't pay taxes or tithes...

Terra: (telepathically) It's not my fault Jarlot didn't read the fine print. (out loud) And the other thing...

The sky grows dark, thunder can be heard in the distance.

Terra: If the worst should happen to my wife, you will take what you can, and run. Quickly.

Rose: I said not to blame me for this!

Terra: Who said I was blaming you? I will be scouring the land, razing everything that bastard ever owned to the ground. I will hunt him and his accomplices to the ends of the cosmos and beyond. The very earth itself will tremble with my rage, the skies will weep at my cruelty.

Elina: *trembling slightly* Mom...don't say that...

Sarah: *hugs her mother tightly* Momma won't die...

Terra: Girls, believe me. I will do everything in my power to keep her safe. But you must understand. Should something awful happen, I will repay them a billion fold. Momma is an absolutely irreplaceable treasure, and I will not stand idly by as anyone who harms her goes unpunished.
rampant

08-26-06, 11:52 AM		Satnak - Get in line I'm ready to make what levy did to our thrane look like a love tap.
urial angel of death

08-26-06, 02:12 PM		The man with the smiling mask walks into Lisa's cell.

Lisa: Where the hell have you been for all these months!

masked man: The usual trying to blow up Brelandish Houses of Parliament, infiltrating various tyranical organizations.

Lisa: How did you know I'd end up here.

masked man: I didn't it was just luck that I was trying to overthrow this tyranny at the same time you were captured.

Lisa: Your tamperings with the machine didn't seem to work.

masked man: Sorry it is very complex. I was able to weaken its hold. In a few more days I will have it cracked completely. Just remeber to try and play along.

Lisa: I don't know if I can.

masked man: Just try.

Lisa: Easy for you to say. For you the ends always justify the means.

masked man: I believe they do. Sorry if you don't agree.

OOC: Do you guys hate my idea or do you really not know who he is. :(
luna18moon

08-26-06, 02:25 PM		OOC: He sounds familiar. *looks at wiki* Is it V? He hasn't been around for ages...
Slaypaw: Even I'm not sure were Fluffy is at the moment. :weep: And we STILL haven't finished Operation C.A.T.!
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

08-26-06, 02:50 PM		Ash stumbles past, a small, sleek cat with scales, savage tallons and dragonic wings is embedded by teeth and claws into his back.
"Ahhhh Get it off me! Get it off meeeee"

Fluffy IHH "Bird, huge bird that smells of catnip :cloud9: MINE!"
luna18moon

08-26-06, 03:13 PM		Slaypaw:*sees Fluffy* Don't hog it!:mad:
Later...
Ash burns the Cats, thus causing them to fall off, and runs.
Slaypaw: Aww.:(
Fluffy: Maybe we should alter Operation C.A.T., and just charge him.:plotting:
Slaypaw: Agreed.:evillaugh
They bound off toward Norbaz's kitchen.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

08-26-06, 03:30 PM		Bunny "Why on earth does a Kenku smell of catnip in the first place?"

13 "Why do you care? he survived."

Bunny "I like him, hes barly been here and hes racking up the body count. I just dont get the catnip after shave."

Silver "One word 'Marish'"

13 "So hes the-"

Silver "Im saying nothing so dont ask."
*****
Ash teleports into Starbudwiser, the coffie house set up by Daniels and Jack, the Booze paraelementals to spread the word of temperance. A tumble weed rolls between tables. Crikets chirip. Its an empty, desolate place.
Ash "Ok, I can hide here untill its time to help terra. No one comes here. no one."
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-26-06, 03:32 PM		Lisa hears a commotion outside her cell. She looks through the barred window (OOC: if there isn't supposed to be one, plot-device it). Two guards are hauling a white wolf down the corridor. They throw it into the cell next to Lisa's.

Lisa: Weylin, what in the name of the flame were you thinking?

Weylin: *pitiful whine*

OOC: :banghead:
Kaizer_Ryu

08-26-06, 04:28 PM		OOC: Elina and Sarah are up on the Wiki, finally. I'll update Terra and Lisa later today.

IC:

After a long conversaiton with her animal operatives, Terra turns to her daughters.

Elina: :( Is Momma ok?

Terra: She's alive, but ok is something I'm not sure of. They...did something to her. My spies couldn't quite tell how much it's really effecting her, but these people are trying to brainwash her.

Sarah: Why are they doing this to Momma? :weep:

Terra: I don't know, but they won't succeed. She's not so weak willed as to be overwhelmed. It's just... (i.h.h.) No. They're apprehensive enough. I can barely stand the thought of it myself...

Elina: Just what?

Terra: I'm just worried about her safety. She can take care of herself in a straight fight, but...

Sarah: :mad: :weep: These awful people play dirty.

Terra: *nods* I had hoped you wouldn't encounter these kind of people till you were older, but I guess it can't be helped. Be prepared for anything. If you think that it'd be too cruel for them to do, they've probably considered it.
rampant

08-26-06, 05:07 PM		Satnak - Dirty hah! You people don't know what dirty fighting is, I'll show you dirty fighting. I'll sever their hearsrtings, i'll rip out their ability to laugh, i'll....i....i....i'm so sick of doing nothing.

Serene - we'll get her back
Kaizer_Ryu

08-26-06, 05:39 PM		Terra: PLAYING dirty, not fighting dirty. There's a huge difference.

Satnak: Seems like you have a possibility in mind.

Terra: I don't dare tell my girls, but there is one thing Kaine could do that I fear above all else.

Satnak: His marrage to her isn't terribly hard to nullify, you can just kill him. Should he force himse-

Terra: :( Don't say it. But even that isn't the worst thing I can imagine Kaine doing.

Satnak: What could be worse than-

The look in Terra's eyes tells her all she needs to know.

Satnak: If he does that, so help me I will do things to him that will turn Terrek's stomach...

OOC: If you think you know what it is, PM me and I'll let you know.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-26-06, 07:53 PM		13: Okay, speculation time.

Bunny: I doubt it's killing her. While that's pretty high on the list, this is a high-magic setting. True resurrection, even miracle or wish would be enough if they use some sort of soul-destroying method.

Silver: Rape her?

OOcat: Grrrrrrr. :mad:

Silver: If one party doesn't want it, then it's a punishable offense in my book.

Bunny: I think I put your horror list in Caralot's room……

13: Brainwash her so that she turns on her own children?

OOcat: Does it strike any of you out there as odd that this is so easy for me?

13: Brainwash her so that she turns on Terra?

Bunny: Maybe brainwash Lisa so that she no longer has feelings for Terra.

Silver: :eek: No way!

Bunny: You see, it's subtle. Breaks Terra's heart. Gives Zaine a chance.
Gladius_Lucix

08-26-06, 08:27 PM		Liam waits for the word that the rescue mission is heading out by working in the lab. He sits at his work desk, brainstorming. His Staff of Holding, and a Wand of Sleep, each with Weirsan recievers attached, rest close at hand, in case the word comes. He chews on the end of the pen as he writes.

Liam: Hmm... A device that controls Weirsan, or uses Weirsan to influence reality, without routing through the channels existant in a normal wand or staff. Similar to the difference between being struck by lightning, and hit by a lightning bolt spell, the ambient Weirsan is what randomly warps the reality around the Forgotten Freedom, while this controlled Weirsan will warp it in a specific manner.

Liam circles this idea, then grabs a new sheet of paper and starts trying to write a plan for making a gadget that could manage this. Furiosly scribbling, he commits designs, plans, and all sorts of sketches to paper.
urial angel of death

08-26-06, 08:43 PM		Volrath: Hannibal, I know this is your first real mission but I need you to go down there and gather information also try to pick of lone soldiers, but no one in groups of four or more.

Hannibal: I understand master. I will not let you down. Will there be a genestealer infiltration?

Volrath: I'll try, but unless we can speed up pregency or go back in time I doubt we will have any success.

OOC: Genestealer infiltrations work by genestealers sneaking into and breeding with the locals.
urial angel of death

08-26-06, 08:50 PM		OOC: Lunar you deserve a cookie for figuring it out. :cookie:

V is working furiously away at the machine.

V: This machine is incredibly complex. It works off a schema to change alignment. Unfortunately it has been too tainted to make it change someone to good. Taking it out isn't an option, they would notice too fast. Wait! What if I... Hope Lisa can live as a paladin of freedom.
Charles Phipps

08-26-06, 08:56 PM		Valenar Palace

Rose: It's going to be difficult to sneak in.

Terra: I just intend to force that guy to turn over my wife and be done with it.

Rose: Well, yes, barring NOT ATTEMPTING TO SNEAK IN AT ALL, that would be very easy.

Terra: You can't sneak in. You have theme music.

Rose: Don't remind me. Everytime I walk, this weird haunting pan pipe starts playing.

Terra: So you're going to provide the distraction?

Rose: Well I've got this shield, a red potion of life, a boomerang, silver arrows, a magical wand, a flute that summons a whirlwind, and a bunch of rubies that they mispronounce with a b in this region. Plus this weird glowing yellow triangle thingy.

Terra: I've got to ask, but when did you get married?

Rose: I wasn't always the worthless bard you knew Terra. The guy selling dragon oil and Potions of Heal-All inbetween playing electric mandolin in dives. I used to be a fairly affluent member of House Lyrander and that's how I met Zella.

Terra: What's she like?

Rose: She made me want to be a better person. That's the only way I can summarize it.

Terra: I see.

Rose: Prince Kaine killed my father before my eyes and then tossed me out into the moat like so much garbage. His affluence was enough to ruin my career and leave me with nothing but my music. It's why I hate the world now and couldn't care less what happens to it.

Terra: We'll put an end to him.

Rose: Yes and possibly destroy other people's lives in the process in the resulting chaos. Nevertheless, I won't run away this time.

Terra: You're afraid of him.

Rose: Kaine has an advisor in the amusingly named Count Evillo. He's not human.

Terra: We've dealt with a Lord of Dust and the Demon in the flame before.

Rose: Yes but have you dealt with a Dragon? Evillo is a reject from the Chamber in Elven form. Powerful and without mercy. If he's taken Lisa then he intends to use her to fulfill some sick part of his prophecy.

Terra: Leave him to me.

Rose: Just realize it won't be combat that he'll go after you with. He'll try to break you mentally.

*Rose got up then and headed out to try and make the distraction*

***

***

Evillo's Lab

Count Evillo: Are you ready?

Lisa: Yes milord.

Count Evillo: That fool Kaine thinks we're brainwashing Lisa alone.

Lisa: It is an easy assumption.

Count Evillo: The poor woman is hopefully devastated with your memories. That was the Machine's TRUE purpose even though it has seemingly been sabotaged. We must assume it may not be possible to suceed. Which is why you needed to be made.

Lisa: I enjoy murder.

Count Evillo: As a Clone of my Mirror of Opposition variant item, that makes sense. In any case, you are assigned a simple mission.

Lisa: And that is?

Count Evillo: Go seek out the one called Terra. She is too powerful to confront directly. Use your memories of her time with Lisa and BREAK her by turning her love against her. Also, try to use the remaining love of Michael against him. He isn't as powerful as Terra but he can weaken her enough that I could probably kill her.

Lisa: Yes milord.

***

Lisa: What's he trying to do?

Zella: He wants to make you evil so he can offer your soul up as a sacrifice to evil for more power.

Lisa: That's horrible.

Zella: That's Xoriat.

Lisa: And he intends to kill me on a wedding night?

Zella: Yes, you don't have to worry about him assaulting you sexually though. He hasn't attempted that with me either.

Lisa: He has some sense of honor?

Zella: No, he doesn't like mature women.

Lisa: Well I...wait...you mean.

*nod*

Lisa: :censored:

Zella: My reaction.
urial angel of death

08-26-06, 09:32 PM		Volrath stands in his room after listening in on Lisa through the link.

Volrath: Into really young women aye.

Hannibal *on his way out the door*: Master I thought you could only feel emotions through the link.

Volrath: Disgust and hate for pedophiles is a very basic emotion for humans.

Hannibal: Ah *leaves*

Volrath pulls a drowsy young girl of about six with blueish skin and small fangs out of a green pod-like sac.

Volrath: Wake up my servant. It will be your job to seduce the Lord Kaine. Use your mesmerise ability if nessisary. If you see Terra aid her in any way you can.

girl: Yes my lord, but I'm am physically weak and I doubt that the child would have time to gestate.

Volrath: You will be there to make sure that even if we fail Kaine will die in one of the most painful ways possible.

girl: Thank you for giving me the honor my lord. :D
Kaizer_Ryu

08-26-06, 10:23 PM		OOC: I've got something big in the works. Please don't post anything with Terra, Michael or the Clone Lisa. I'll be done in a bit, it's just taking me longer than I thought.
Charles Phipps

08-26-06, 10:24 PM		OOC: I look forward to it. I made this scenario because of what you described in your private message. I think this is exactly the kind of adventure scene you wanted to do.

;-)
urial angel of death

08-26-06, 10:42 PM		OOC: please include Hannibal and the girl if you can. V would also be nice but very secondary.
Charles Phipps

08-26-06, 10:46 PM		OOC: I think this is just his scene, and not the final wrap up. I'll be handling Kaine and Rose's confrontation scene and try to use them.
urial angel of death

08-26-06, 10:50 PM		OOC: Thank you. :D
Kaizer_Ryu

08-26-06, 10:55 PM		Zella: No, he doesn't like mature women.
OOC: Just so you know, there will be much blood for this. I swear it.

Charles Phipps is correct. This is just part one. Just to preface, there is something about this family I haven't mentioned, but I'll get to it in another post.

IC:

As Rose leads the distraction, Terra melts into the shadows. The dungeon is sealed off from planar travel, so she searches for the entrance to it. As she does so, a familiar figure causes her heart to skip. Standing near the dungeon is Lisa. Her spies information was correct. Her armor was that of a Blackguard, and the aura of evil and hate was as powerful as her aura of good and love was before. It was her, brainwashed, but...something was not right. There was something...about her. Something in the back of Terra's mind that rebelled at the thought that this could be Lisa. She tentatively dismissed it as disbelief that her love could be so warped, but proceeded with caution. Before she exited the shadows, a pair of figures warped in. Michael and his Cluebatiel arrive before Lisa.

Saint Michael: Please, Lisa, you must come with me. Terrible things are afoot. I shall protect you with my life.

Lisa: Is this Michael the Paladin, or Michael the loser romantic speaking?

Saint Michael: I...no, it is my duty as a Paladin to see you safely back to your wife. You have been tainted by these cretins.

She reaches out and strokes his cheek.

Lisa: Tainted? Isn't this what you always hoped I would become?

Saint Michael: Please...I...

Lisa leans in, as if to kiss him.

Saint Michael: I...

WHAM!

Clubatiel: No master! You must not succumb!

Saint Michael: *holding his head* Yes...yes, you're right. Thank you. Come, Lisa. We must flee. The crew will keep them distracted.

Lisa: *seductively* The brave knight coming to my rescue. I'll see to it that you get a reward...

Lisa grabs the hammer from the Cluebatiel and tosses it aside. She goes to kiss Michael again.

Michael: A Paladin...needs no...re...

As his resolve weakens, one of Terra's tentacles whips out and pulls him away.

Terra: *emerging* Tisk tisk, Michael. You almost lost it there.

Lisa: Ah, my loving wife. How nice of you to join us.

Terra: What happened to you?

Lisa: My eyes have been opened. I am no longer bound by those silly restrictions of religion and Paladinhood.

Terra: *shakes her head* That...I refuse to accept.

Lisa: But it is true. Prince Kaine and Count Evillo are most wise. They have freed me in a way you never could.

Terra: You are not yourself.

Lisa: And who are you to say that? You love me, do you not? I accepted you, despite all your evil acts. Why can you not accept me as I am now?

Terra: Stop this...this is not the real you.

Lisa: Listen to you. What would our children say, hearing their beloved "Mom" deny their "Momma"? Would you deny me their presence just because of what I am?

Terra: :weep: You are not my Lisa!

Lisa: *shakes her head in disgust* So very foolish. I can't believe I married you. You claimed to understand me, claimed to love me for me. But here you are, rejecting me because I don't live up to your standards!

Lisa walk over to Terra, who is now sobbing quietly. With a loud *CRACK*, she slaps Terra across the face. Terra stumbles to the side, doubled over in shock.

Lisa: Perhaps if you'd have gotten here sooner, perhaps if you really cared about me, I wouldn't have changed.

Terra: :weep: Stop it...please... :weep:

Lisa: You know why I left without telling you? Because I knew you'd try and stop me. You couldn't stand even the possibility of me choosing my real husband over my fake wife. You are such a selfish b*tch!

She raises her hand to strike her again, only to have her wrist caught by Terra's hand.

Terra: You are not my wife.

Lisa: *pulling away* Glad to see you accept it. Perhaps my new husband will do a better job at raising our little girls than a failure like yourself. *smiles evilly* I can imagine all the "fun" he'll have with them.

Terra: YOU ARE NOT MY WIFE!

Lisa is thrown back by a blast of magical energy. She crashes into the wall, quite surprised.

Lisa: You see! *turns to Michael* This is her true nature! You wish to protect me, save me from this monster!

Almost on command, Michael leaps at Terra, only to be parried with her tentacles.

Terra: Michael! Get a hold of yourself! She's not who she claims to be! Open yo- *ghurgle*

In Terra's distraction, Lisa had pulled out a greatsword. It was now driven into Terra's side. She collapsed, finding herself unable to move. The blade seemed to paralyze her as it pulsed with dark energy.

Lisa: You like it? A cursed blade for a cursed woman. It feeds off your blood, growing stronger as your life fades.

Terra: I can't...move... *coughs up blood* Michael...please...

Lisa: Begging for help? You have no shame. Leave her be, Michael. She took me away from you. She now wants to kill me. Will you not aid me?

Saint Michael: I...but...

Terra: *labored breathing* Don't...listen to her... This isn't the real Lisa. She's in danger... *begins crying anew* please...I need to help her...

Saint Michael: (i.h.h.) What do I do? Who do I believe? I'm so...confused...What am I doing? Why am I...?

Lisa: Why do you hesitate? Kill her! Strike down the enemies of Good!

Michael raises his sword. The storm in his head settles as he reaches a decision. The downward strike ends not with the crunch of metal on bone, but with the clang of metal on metal. Twisting his arm, he swings sideways to strike the top of hilt of the cursed sword, sending it across the room.

Saint Michael: *turning to Lisa* You are not Lisa. Begone, foul beast!

Lisa dives for the sword, only to be blocked by the Cluebatiel. She turn back to face Michael again, only to have Michael's sword pierce her armor, driving through her heart.

Evil Lisa Clone: *cough* Not...bad...but you have not stopped us. The woman will be dead before you can save her. And *cough* ...there are things worse than death...

Screams echo through the halls. Terra instantly recognizes them as Elina and Sarah.

ELC: Ha...haha...hahahahHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!

Fire consumes her in an instant as an enraged Terra recovers.

Terra: I will thank you for believing me later, Michael.

Saint Michael: I will search for Lisa. You must help your children.

Terra hesitates for a moment.

Saint Michael: GO! I will find her! The rest of the crew is searching for her as well. Save the innocent ones!

Terra nods and melts into the shadows again. If harm came to any of them, she would see the Valenar rivers run red for generations to come...
urial angel of death

08-26-06, 11:18 PM		OOC: I've been going through my recent posts and tried to correct all the mistakes. Man there are a lot. I typed "honor" as "own".
rampant

08-27-06, 12:50 AM		Terra Finds her children transfixed at the sight of Satnak covered in gore, and fairly glowing with Necrocarnum.

Sarah - She's been Like that since the count guy said something about what kaine would do to us, she...she ate his soul.

Elina - Just bit through his eye and dragged it out with the brain.

Sarah - She's skinned every gaurd alive since then.

Elina - We tried to look in her eyes but they scared us.

Sarah - She just froze then and hasn't moved since.
Charles Phipps

08-27-06, 12:52 AM		The Great Tree Oalian the Oaklord loomed above the recently exiled Bard as he played the pan-pipes that were his preferred insturment. The Great Tree stood at least forty feet tall and loomed with an ancient wisdom that the gods had bestowed upon it during Ancient Times. It was one of the lasted 'Anointed' of the Gods and its intelligence was equal to any being in the world since it was well over two thousand years old...perhaps even far older.

"Do you intend to stay here forever Rose?" The Oaklord finally asked the boy while he sat down upon the great roots.

"As long as I can," Rose answered.

Rose: Well, once more I am sneaking into an evil overlord's castle.

V: Greetings new Captain.

Rose: Oh hello, Jarlot told me about you. You're the crazy anarchist whom has a thing for Natalie Portman.

V: I also have been trying to help Lisa stay unbrainwashed.

Rose: has it worked?

V: So far.

Rose: in any case, we don't have much more time.

Zella: HELLO!

Lisa: Hi guys.

Rose: Well....that was easy.

Zella: V pocketed the keys. He's very handy.

Rose: Well...uhhh..Zella...long time no see.

Zella: Ooops, I forgot. I'll head back to the dungeon and sound the alarm so you can fight off a horde of guards to gallantly rescue me.

Rose: No, no that's fine.

Zella: I can put myself in a magical sleep if you want!

Rose: We're okay.

Zella: Oh phooey!

Rose: In any case, I must now confront....

Prince Kaine: The evil Prince kaine?

Rose: Oh there's the child abuser now.

Lisa: DIE YOU BLACK HEARTED VARMIT!

Rose: Lisa this is sort of my f...

*Lisa is blasted backwards by lightning from Prince kaine's hand*

Rose: Oh crap.

Prince Kaine: I think my firt act will be to get you all doused with potions of longeviety.

Rose: I keep forgetting what a loathsome scumbag you are.

Prince Kaine: And what are you going to do about it? GUARDS! ATTACK!

*Rose deftly weaves through them and stabbing before they fall to the ground*

Rose: My name is Rose Galan, you killed my father, prepare to die.

*Prince Kain stares, lowers his blade, then runs away*

Rose: GAWDS DAMNIT!

*runs after him down the hall*

Zella: Amazing that such a horrible monster can still be used to make Princess Bride references.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

08-27-06, 08:19 AM		Ash "It is time."

The Valenar Palave guards asemble, ready to make there defense. There is a disaplined hustle as they are about there tasks, arming, straping on armour, asigning rally points and strategy.

A figure apaers in there midst, scarelet and blue flames wash over an angular frame, black talloned raven claws float a span from the granate flag stones. Flickering shadows radiating away from him. He laughs, wating untill every eye is on him. Flames burn in eyes like speheres of jet. He unfolds his arm in a downward blow, and flame washes out from him, blue and scarlet. Breaks over the gatherd wariors like a wave, washing armor and flash alike away and leaving only molten metal and half consumed flesh behind it. his laugh becomes deeper, even though he is alone but for the flames. With a gesture he crafts a writhing lash of flame, with another wreathes it in brighter conflageration.

Elsewhere would be more kindling. His roost would not go unavenged.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-27-06, 08:46 AM		OOcat: (looks over the previous posts) Looks like everything is under control. *sigh*

13: So? Introduce a complication.

OOcat: I'm a character by now. I'm not allowed to be cruel.

Bunny: How does a guy with enough honor to spill over into the fictional world ever have any fun?

OOcat: *brain tingle*

Silver: :bored: That happens………………By the way, we should run.

13 & Bunny: Agreed.
********
Count Evillo: Bah! :mad: Plan "Break Terra by fooling her with and evil clone of her wife to make her think that there love was gone and therefore break her heart and spirit by having to kill the one she loves" was a complete failure. *sigh* Oh well, time for plan "Summon a really evil and really cool powerful demon from an alternate Eberron who will do my bidding exclusively because I am such an evil and powerful dude".

Henchman: I hate my job.

Count Evillo: *chant in ancient evil language that remarkably sounds like the "I love you" song from Barney*

*cool smoke effects with lights and sounds and the complete FX budget*

Cool Evil: (cool voice) Why have you summoned me?

Count Evillo: :devil: To help me TAKE OVER THE WORLD!

Evil Plan: 1. Distract the FF with the whole Kaine-Lisa thing so they have no time to mess up my plans.
2. Summon evil so cool that it could never be defeated.
3. Have cool evil take over the world for me.
4. World Domination!
Kaizer_Ryu

08-27-06, 10:49 AM		Terra hugs her children tightly, relieved beyond measure that they escaped unharmed.

Terra: I told you to stay with the others. Why did you run off?

Elina: We heard Momma's voice, and wanted to save her.

Sarah: But it was just a fake. The Count guy captured us for some reason. He kept going on about a "prophesy" or something.

Satnak: It wasn't him. That soul was no Dragon of the Chamber. Even a former one. Maybe a piece of him, but not the whole thing.

*RUMBLE*

*COOL EVIL DEMON IS SUMMONED*

Terra: Ok, that's not a good feeling.

Satnak: I got it. You get them out of here. The last thing we need is Kaine getting a hold of them. Even I don't want to know what you would do.

As Satnak heads out, Terra takes the girls to their demi-plane.

Elina: But-

Terra: This isn't a game. Do you know what Kaine wants with you? *they shake their heads* It's something too horrible to even mention. Something so deplorable that all but the Dark Six cringe at it. Yes, you are strong. Yes, you are cunning. But you are not ready to confront such vile creatures. Not yet.

Sarah: Ye-

Terra: How did you feel when you saw Satnak kill those guards? Scared? *they nod* Doing it yourself is a thousand times worse. These guards are not here because they believe in what the Prince and Count are doing. This is their job. They have families, friends, lives. Could you take all that away from them simply because they are in the wrong place at the wrong time? That is something you are not ready for. Something I hope you never have to be ready for.

Elina: But, we want to help Momma!

Terra: You can help Momma by staying safe. *they start to protest* I know you want to help get her back. But that is something the rest of us can take care of. There is something you can do, though.

Sarah: Anything!

Terra: This has been very hard on Momma. She's going to need your support once we get her back.

Sarah: That's it?

Terra: That will mean more to her than you can imagine.

Elina: ...ok.

The girls hug their mother tightly.

Sarah: Do you promise you'll come back safe?

Terra: Without a doubt.

Terra warps back to the point she was at in the castle to resume the hunt. She knew from their link that Lisa was ok for now. She would have to find her soon (she doesn't know Rose found her). The count would have to wait.
rampant

08-27-06, 10:55 AM		Satnak - Demon huh? Bring it.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-27-06, 11:39 AM		FX Demon: Cue cool theme music!

*Cool theme music*

Cool Evil comes walking in. Satnak and Terra see at once that he isn't a demon. It actually just looks like a cool guy half-elf, wearing a cool dark jacket, jeans, and the latest in "cool" sneakers. His hair is black and has the ragged look you can only get right in anime. He is smoking a cigarette.

Cool Evil: Hey, ladies. *POWER OF COOL*

Satnak: :blink: …………Is that it? You just stand there looking cool? Well let me rearrange your face for you. *flying fist of REALLLLLLLLY going to hurt*

Satnak's fist passes right through Cool Evil.

Cool Evil: Did I mention that I'm immune to anything that isn't really "cool"?

Terra: Then try this! *blast of raw power*

Passes right through Cool Evil.

Cool Evil: *cool look*

Count Evillo comes in. "Ha! Now you shall taste the power of truely COOL EVIL!"

Nothing happens for a while as Count Evillo just stands there, looking maniacly menicing.

Count Evillo (to Cool Evil): :confused: Um, aren't you supposed to…y'know?

Cool Evil: Do what, man?

Count Evillo: Well, kill them?

Cool Evil: And why would I do that?

Count Evillo: Um, because I order you to? Yeah, that's it, I order you to kill them.

Cool Evil: :bored: Like I'd listen to someone as uncool as you.

Count Evillo: Huh??

Cool Evil just stands there, looking bored (which is "cool").

Count Evillo: :eek: But I summoned you! You're supposed to obey me!

Cool Evil: Whine, whine. It's so uncool.

A gun appears in Cool Evil's hand, and he shoots all three with it.

Cool Evil: Now all I need is an entourage, preferably of young kids, to fawn over me. (looks coolly at Terra)

Terra: *gurgle*

Cool Evil: Oh, don't worry, I'm not like Zaine, that sort of stuff isn't cool.

Cool Evil disappears into a cool portal.

OOC: "All the cool kids are doing it." I think you can see where I'm going. Note that I have no expectation that Terra and Satnak can't handle the gun. It's just "cool".
rampant

08-27-06, 12:07 PM		Satnak - Gunpowder? Is that all you got? Please tell me that isn't it.

Cool Evil - How'd you get in my portal?

Satnak - *points at blink shirt*

Cool Evil - besides gun powder weapons are cool

Satnak - :rolleyes: Hardly, they are tools like anyother. "Cool" is how its used. Like this:D .

Satnak uses a call weapon power to conjure forth an ectoplasmic shotgun. Blinking out once again, She reapears behind Cool Evil and fires through his shoulder.

Evil Cool - Sweet OW!

Satnak - Now, onto other business.

----------------------

Count Evillo - it looks like your pet brute has abandoned you.

Terra - I don't have time for this crap, turns to continue looking for Lisa.

Count Evillo - Arrogant mortal, I'll-

Chik-Boom to the head

Satnak - You go on ahead, I'm gonna shove this thing someplace uncomfortable and pull the trigger.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

08-27-06, 02:26 PM		Ash teleports bach onto the forgoton Fredom.

"They want cool? I'll give them cool. Klaz, I need a T-Rex and sadle, make it a tame one. Ketler, I need an elemental graft of scrching gaze, and I need it now."

Ketler "But- taht takes days."

Ash "Your the best, do it in hours."

Later

Ash "Now for the final act." shifts form, becoming a warforged dressed in a loose black all in one suit of soft cloth. Climbs into the Dinosaurs saddle. "Nothing is cooler than a Psichic robot ninja pirate with heat vison who is also riding a dinosaur! Bring it on" :devil:

The crew :uh-huh:

( Occ: Not meaning to derail anything rampant, please use as you see fit, but how often am I going to beable to do this again? :bigeyes: )
Crystalforged

08-27-06, 03:22 PM		OOCrystalforged: I'm not quite dead yet.

Kanatash: 'bout time you showed up again.

OOCrystalforged: Did you miss me?

Kanatash: If by "you" you mean the attention I've been deprived of for the last few days, then yes.

OOCrystalforged: Pity that I'm rejoining the story right at the climax.

Kanatash: True, it makes it hard for you to insert me into it.

OOCrystalforged: Well, I suppose I can volunteer you to help with the fate worse than death punishment sure to be inflicted on these the BBEG's if they survive.

Kanatash: Good point, we still have that torture I was going to use on Tormos too. I think I can adapt it with little difficulty if given a chance.
rampant

08-27-06, 03:35 PM		Satnak - Just you and me dragon.

Count Evillo - Ahh yes the dreaded Satnak. You are difficult to pin down, what are you really, no mere mortal could have risen to such power, much less without the dragons knowing.

Satnak - You talk too much. *jams shot gun where the sun don't shine*

Count Evillo - OIK!

Satnak - Bye-bye *click*

skrakroom
Kaizer_Ryu

08-27-06, 03:50 PM		Terra comes across Lisa as she recovers from the lightning blast. Rose and Zella are nowhere to be seen, both having chased after Prince Kaine. Terra throws her arms around her in her joy.

Terra: Are you ok?

Lisa: My head's spinning, but, yeah...

Terra: Let's get you up.

Lisa: Rose is going after Kaine. I don't know where Evillo is.

Terra: Satnak's taking care of him as we speak. I know he was doing something to you.

Lisa: V showed up and tampered with the machine they were using. They said something about a Plan B.

Terra: Yeah. She's dead. They made an evil clone of you and tried to pass her off as you. Didn't work, though.

Count Evillo: Had I anticipated your empathic link, it would have.

Lisa: You!

Terra: But...what about Satnak?

Count Evillo: I'm not remotely stupid enough to take either of you on myself. Not without precautions, at least.

A loud explosion is heard in the distance.

Satnak: OW! GODS DAMMIT!! :censored: ing construct! (i.h.h.) The damn thing was filled with Sovereign Glue!

Terra: What do you want?

Count Evillo: Only to finish what I started.

Terra: Stay away from my wife, you sick bastard.

Count Evillo: Too late for that. Come here, my dear.

As if compelled by a powerful force, Lisa begins walking forward, obviously struggling.

Lisa: H-how are you...?

Count Evillo: You thought the machine was the only thing I did to you? Ruthatag.

The keyword spoken, Lisa loses herself to the mental charms.

Count Evillo: Losing the clone was unfortunate, but having the real thing do it instead will be so much sweeter. :evillaugh

Terra: YOU BASTARD!

In a titanic blast of energy, she turns him to particles. The illusion drops just before it disappears, revealing another construct. It says only two words before it dies.

Evillo Construct: Kill her.

Lisa turns and whips out her sword. Without hesitation, she strikes at Terra with all her fury. Dodging to the side, Terra's body is wracked by pain. The wound from before still burned, and she felt her strenght drain away to barely half.

Terra: (i.h.h.) Idiot! She meant it when she said cursed! Activating only during battle...Evillo had this planned all along.

Not willing to return fire, Terra has no choice but to dodge and try to reason with her.

Terra: Wake up, Lisa! He's using you!

Lisa: Nice try, Kaine. You won't bluff your way out of this.

Terra: What...? No, Lisa, it's me! Terra!

Lisa: How dare you! You can never take her place!

She strikes at her again as Terra hops away.

Terra: How can I get through to you...?

Lisa points her sword at Terra.

Lisa: You intend to kill me for your own selfish goals! I will not be taken in by your lies! I will never and could never love a monster like you!

Terra: (i.h.h.) She's completely taken in by the illusion. She thinks I'm Kaine. Evillo has used her very devotion to me against her. But...what can I do? If I strike back, I'll only hurt her while reinforcing the illusion...but...

She sees only one opportunity. Risky, yes, but she had faith in Lisa. Her eyes would see the truth. They had to...

Terra: I'm not going to fight you. I refuse. I will not hurt the one I love.

Lisa: What trickery is this? You expect me to believe you?!

Terra willfully represses all her abilities. Her magic, her psionics, even her natural damage reduction. Her magical aura all but vanishes as she lets her arms fall to her side.

Terra: I will not fight you.

Lisa: Such a coward! Acting defensless so I won't attack. You have no shame!

She charges Terra, ready to strike her down. Terra doesn't move a muscle. Even as the sword pierces her stomach, she refuses to defend herself. The sword, buried almost to it's hilt protrudes from her back as she falls forward onto Lisa's shoulder. Utterly confused, Lisa tries to come to grips with this turn of events.

Lisa: *her voice wavering* Why? Why didn't you move? What purpose does it serve?

Terra: *softly into her ear* I love you...

The mental charms shatter as the illusion is exposed. Lisa lets go of her sword, horror sticken with what she has just done.

Lisa: Terra...? Is that...oh my gods, what have I done?! :weep:

Terra smiles at her weakly as blood dribbles out of the side of her mouth.

Terra: You broke free, just as I knew you would. Just *cough* get this thing out of me...

Terra cringes as Lisa removes her sword. Her magical aura returns slowly as Lisa heals her wound and removes the curse.

Lisa: I'm sorry...I'm so sorry... :weep:

Terra: You have nothing to apologize for. Count Evillo is the one to blame. I'm just glad you're back.

Lisa: I didn't even notice...

Terra: *looks her in the eye* That's not your fault. I showed you the way, but you were the one to break his hold. I never doubted you would.

Lisa: I'm sorry I went off on my own. I just felt I could do this without dragging you into my problems.

Terra: When I married you, your problems became mine. Just as much as you knew what you were getting into, I knew too. If I wasn't able to accept who you were, I never would have asked. So please, don't do something like this again.

Lisa: I had to try and resolve this peacefully. You can't expect me not to-

Terra: :) No, silly. I meant don't leave me out of it. I promised to stay by you no matter what. I would follow you into hell itself without a second thought.

Lisa: :weep: Thank you... *hugs her gently* Why does it seem like the universe wants to break us apart?

Terra: I don't know, but I'm never leaving you. I love you with every fiber of my being. Fate can try all it wants, but that will never change.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-27-06, 04:06 PM		"Nothing is cooler than a Psichic robot ninja pirate with heat vison who is also riding a dinosaur! Bring it on" :devil:
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: *wipes tears of laughter from his eyes* That's beautiful, Eled. :clap:
rampant

08-27-06, 04:12 PM		Satnak dashes into the room carrying a constuct's leg as a club.

Terra - You look entirely too smug.

Satnak - I figured something out.

Lisa - What?

Satnak - All of the contructs operate on a telepathic link with the Count so. I just need to find a functioning unit. You scrapped your didn't you.

Terra - hehe:embarrass

Satnak - That leaves plan B.

Lisa - B as in blow up the castle I presume.

Satnak - B for blast the castle to a smoking ruin, but same basic result.

Lisa - Lets make that plan C.

Satnak - No thats collapse the castle from the inside. They go all the way up to S for shaking it down.

Terra - Shake...Shake, do it, but build it up slowly we smash the count when he makes a run for it.

Lisa - What about the captain?

Satnak - What about him?

Terra - He's a bard on a mission, he exists soley for this sort of scenario, collapsing castle, villian to kill, princess to rescue, he'll be fine.

Lisa - Alright just let me get Weylin out.
Charles Phipps

08-27-06, 04:13 PM		*Count Evillo appears on a spell-screen*

Count Evillo: How nauseating.

*Points at Lisa and starts to enunciate a word*

Michael: NO!

*Michael jumps in front of her*

POWER WORD KILL

*Michael coughs up blood and collapses at their feet*

Count Evillo: Damnit.

***

Prince Kaine: Irritating little insect.

Rose: I've been called that on NUMEROUS occasions.

Prince Kaine: Yes, well this is the last time.

*the two begin their duel*

Prince Kaine: Do you know I've studied fencing for one hundred years?

*stabs Rose in the shoulder*

Rose: Yes...I do.

Prince Kaine: Here's another fact. You're a bard and not a swordsman.

*stabs Rose in the other shoulder*

Rose: I know that unfortunately.

Prince Kaine: And here's another fact, your father died on his knees BEGGING for his life.

Rose: And so will you

Prince Kaine: Fool.

*Rose kicks Kaine down a staircase as he moves out of the way of the next lunge*

Rose: That leads down to Satnak's current place of imprisonment. After three or four fake Count Evillos, I think she needs to let off some steam.

Prince Kaine: I can make it worth your while to let me go.

Rose: Money doesn't mean anything to me after all you've done to me.

Prince Kaine: Pity.

*Throws a dirk into Rose's leg as he collapses down the stairs himself*

Prince Kaine: Now for the killing stroke. I may have to make an exception to my enjoyments for that brat of a wife. In the right light, she does look rather childish.

Rose: Do your worst.

Prince Kaine: I will.

Rose: I wasn't talking to you.

*a voice echoed from behind*

Prince Kaine: Aren't you supposed to do this sort of thing yourself? Being a noble hero and handle the mission of vengeance yourself?

Rose: I'm a progressive storyteller.

OOC: Spellscreens are effectively television links. I sort of like the idea Dragons of Argonessan are fairly advanced technologically.
rampant

08-27-06, 04:21 PM		Satnak - Got you *psionic teleport*

Count Evillo - Come Now you can't poss- She's behind me isn't she. *looks* Nice Bluff mortal-GRar

A hand rises from the earth and pulls the count under.

Satnak - Apparently your screen uses the same connection system as the copies. Once I had a lock on your position you were just a quick powerstone away.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-27-06, 04:27 PM		*Resurrection*

Saint Michael: *cough* I'm...alive?

Terra: My thanks for saving my life.

OOC: Sorry if I messed with something you had in mind, Charles, but this seemed like a prime opportunity for Terra returning the favor.
rampant

08-27-06, 04:33 PM		OORampant - Aactually Terra doesn't have the ability to cast that spell.

Micheal - does this mean i die, before I can atone.

OORampant - No it just means your now a gnoll...and (sound of dice rolling) female.

Micheal - At least my stuff should still fit. *puff of un-logic*

Terra - *whisper to OORampant* since when is genderbending part of the spell?

OORampant - *return whisper* it's not I just wanna see how long it takes him to figure it out.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-27-06, 04:39 PM		OOKaizer: Actually, she can. She's Half-Celestial with 40 HD. Page 145 of MM1.

OORampant: So, that means...

*puff of logic*

Michael: YAY! I'm back to normal!
rampant

08-27-06, 04:47 PM		OORampant - You never let me have any fun. :tantrum:

OOKaizer - Shouldn't you be doing something else.

OORampant - :confused: :lightbulb
------------------------

Kithle - Oh I do so love my job.

Chalky - Popcorn anyone?

Lucky - Only if you haven't laced it with paint thinner.

Chalky - no just caramel

Vrin - (Looking green) I found that bowl already:yuck:

In the skies above a projected display shows everything that is happening inside the castle to the people of the surrounding countryside.
Charles Phipps

08-27-06, 04:47 PM		Satnak - Apparently your screen uses the same connection system as the copies. Once I had a lock on your position you were just a quick powerstone away.

Count Evillo: Oh very well.

*Satnak rips into Evillo*

Satnak: You're...not...damaged?

Count Evillo: I'm sorry Satnak. I've neglected to mention something my dear warrior whom thinks she can conquer anything.

Satnak: And what's that?

Count Evillo: I'm a Prismatic Dragon Ascendent Councillor.

Satnak: :censored:

OOC: If we give a name to this adventure, It might be "Satnak Can't Win." All she wants to do is slaughter Count Evillo yet everytime she tries....she gets messed over.

Of course, things aren't always as they appear.

***

Prince Kaine: It seems Satnak has no interest in helping you.

Rose: Yeah, I kinda noticed that. I mean....GOD FORBID she help out the wounded guy on the ground.

Prince Kaine: Not her style I suspect. She'll be dead soon enough. The laws of reality are in strict enforcement there and all of her magic is utterly helpless before an Elder Wyrm. She must flee or seek help.

Terra: It's time to take you out.

Prince Kaine: You're too used to foes facing you directly.

*Terra sneered*

Terra: Prepare to die you....

*Prince Kaine aims a wand and the entire room is covered in an anti-magic shell*

Prince Kaine: *lifts crossbow* Surrender or I kill your brats immediately.

Saint Michael: I'm really starting to hate this guy even more than Sutekh or Arijani.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-27-06, 04:54 PM		Terra: Considering they're not here, it'd be fairly hard for you to do that.

*STABBITY DEATH*

Lisa: Nice try.

Prince Kaine: *Lisa's sword sticking out his chest* :mad: I dislike you with great intensity. *collapse*

OOC: Take it from here. I just wanted to do that. I hate him so much.
Charles Phipps

08-27-06, 05:00 PM		Forgotten Freedom

Ketler: Wait a damn minute, Prismatic Dragons aren't canon in Eberron!

Pholly: You mean he's extra dimensional?

Ketler: *checks his handbook* No I'm saying that badboy is a Young Adult Blue Dragon ILLUSIONIST!

Pholly: Wow, intelligent fighting on this ship. Whom would have guessed.

***

Elsewhere

Princess Zella: Oh woe! Will our heroines be saved by the handsome prince?

Lisa: Uhhhh we can take care of ourselves Zella. In fact, it was us whom saved Rose.

Princess Zella: Oh woe! Will our heroines be saved by themselves before marrying the handsome Prince?

Lisa: Rescuing someone doesn't necessarily mean they'll make a good husband.

Princess Zella: But how would I find out whom to entrust all of my fortune and kingdom to in my husband if not for rescuing?

Lisa: Uh....huh.

Princess Zella: Rose is alright I suppose. He was kind enough to rescue me from the Dragon, the Bandits, the Evil Wizard Advisor to my father, and now Prince Kaine but he really never quite gets it right.

Prince Kaine: Perhaps...*gurgle* I should have established the fact that the crossbow was meant for you and my men have orders to kill your children which they captured....if anything should happen to me. *dies*

Terra: No!

*they rush upstairs to find Elina has put the guards to sleep with Rose' harp*

Elina: Wow, that charm uncle rose cast really does work.
rampant

08-27-06, 05:08 PM		Satnak - HAhahahahahahahahaha

Count Evillo - I do believe she's succumed to histeria.

Satnak - Got your nose.

Count Evillo - And so? I'm 1,000 times your size little mortal.

Satnak - Just enouch mass to create the energy needed to finish my evolution SIN OF CONSUMPTION!

The great Dragon's form begins to fray at the edges, particulate matter is converted to energy and absorbed through Satnak's glowing traceries.

Count Evillo - What is this?

Satnak - Execution at its finest. Your body, mind, spirit, and soul are being burned to fuel my last steeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrgggg ggg.

Count Evillo - I doubt you can dodge while your doing it though *prismatic Breath*

Satnak - RRRRRRRRRRRReeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeea aaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuuuuuuggggggggggkrezagk

As the glittering prismatic light gathers in the Counts jaws, the grey glow of Satnak's power collects within her body. As the Count Exhales, so to does the Breaker prime. One a wave of spreading prismatic magic, the other a beam of incarnum saturated ectoplasm. As their forces collide within the counts jaws, he realizes his error.

Count Evillo - (i.h.h. Even if I win She's so close and pouring out enough power to hurt even kill me if I don't get farther away, unfortunatly I can't fly with my wings eaten away.)

Satnak - (i.h.h. now for my next trick)

The focus of her beam sharpens, and begins passing through the wave of the Count's breath. Unfortunatly this allows the prismatic force to move around the beam and continue towards Satnak. As she braces for impact she tightens her grip, she notices something peculiar, the scales don't feel like the scales of her prismatic dragon on board the ship. Not smooth, more like jagged sand etched rocks. As the prismatic force connects, she sense less of the deliriousness caused by the blasts of her own, beast and more zappy.

Satnak - (i.h.h. either he's a breath master who tried a meta-breath combo on me or, the prismatic is a bluff, doesn't matter the illusion won't hide him from the absorbtion, but how did he know to add the proper effects tothe illusion to fool me?)
Charles Phipps

08-27-06, 05:13 PM		Ketler: She looks so happy, I don't know if I want to tell her she's not actually beating a prismatic dragon.

Pholly: She'd just kill you anyway.

Ketler: Oh.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-27-06, 05:20 PM		Terra: *sigh* Why are you here?

Elina: Narrative Element.

Lisa: *GLARES at OOCharles*

OOCharles: :eek:

Sarah: But he also Narrative Elemented a solution...

Terra: Fine. You get to leave unscathed.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

08-27-06, 05:22 PM		:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: *wipes tears of laughter from his eyes* That's beautiful, Eled. :clap:

Thank you, thank you :w00t: :bow: ( mind If that gets sigged?)
I just wish we could work it into the plot. Satnak kina dealt with the cool deamon as I was typing :/
rampant

08-27-06, 05:29 PM		OOC: Its still alive, she just messed up his shoulder since he seemed to not be interested in messing with Terra and Lisa. She just takes any sort of defense as a personal challenge.
Charles Phipps

08-27-06, 05:31 PM		OOC: Its still alive, she just messed up his shoulder since he seemed to not be interested in messing with Terra and Lisa. She just takes any sort of defense as a personal challenge.

OOC: Just pointing out that he's not a Prismatic Dragon. Ketler suggested it was an illusion, which was what was intended all along.

Oh well, as for Elina. What's a game without threatening small children!?

;-)
rampant

08-27-06, 05:34 PM		OOC: Just pointing out that he's not a Prismatic Dragon. Ketler suggested it was an illusion, which was what was intended all along.

Oh well, as for Elina. What's a game without threatening small children!?

;-)

I mean the demon. Not the dragon/count
Charles Phipps

08-27-06, 05:38 PM		I mean the demon. Not the dragon/count

Ooops, man I'm screwing up a lot today. Great stuff though Rampant.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

08-27-06, 06:09 PM		Terra: "Where Is Sara any way?"
*****
Mean while, in the palaces main hall
Sarah: "The Deamon is good, the deamon is great, I surender my will, as of this date!"

Cool Deamon "In Ebberon, first you get the Children, then you get the power, then you get the Hit dice"

*Door explodes inwards in a wash of flame from a Psichic robot ninja pirate with heat vison who is also riding a dinosaur!*

P.R.N.P.w.H.V Ash "Then you get your ass kicked?"

Cool deamon "What? no, it cannot be!"

P.R.N.P.w.H.V Ash "Cool deamon eh? that means you have the cold subtype? Bad move-"

Cool deamon leaps to his feet and punches P.R.N.P.w.H.V Ash sending him backwatds tjrough the wall, the T-rex sumersauts, lashes out in a roundhouse kick.

*cool Deamon doges by leaning back at a right angle verry very slowly from the waist before righting himself and graping the dinosars leg.*
"Is that the best you can do?"

P.R.N.P.w.H.V Ash "No, I just wanted to see wht yours was..."
Disapears, reapering behind the cool deamon as his dinosaur mount flows into a perfect spear kick, its leg begoming engulfed in flames as it conects, in a roar of pain and flash of steam.

Cool Deamon "My leg... My :censored:ing leg!"

P.R.N.P.w.H.V Ash "Im sorry, I was aiming for your head!" *Psichic robot ninja pirate burning death attack!* the Cool deamon weaves to the side at the final moment, as a gout of pure heat melts the wall beyond him and starts the suprting timbers aflame.

Cool deamon "You missed" leaps up to Ash's saddle and throws a deadly punch, Ash's hand barly seems to move, and then is suddenly apears griping the fist, his hand wreathed in flame.
"Not realy, I just like setting things on fire" slams a hand into its face and then invokes his flame lash, the tendril of fire wraping round the deamons searing form. it dies.

Sarah: The Deamon is go-" *snaps out of it and begins to look embrased.*
urial angel of death

08-27-06, 06:24 PM		Cool Evil appears in front of Terra and preforms a needlessly complex katana swirl.

Cool Evil: Now I will give you one of the coolest death scenes ever.

Cool Evil pulls back to preforms some insane super move and is cut into three pieces. A scythe claw cutting through his waist and neck. A taloned hand bursts from his chest. It is clutching his still beating heart. His skull collapses inward as feeder tentacles crush into it. The creatures to whom the appendages belong steps out of the shadows behind what remains of Cool Evil.

Hannibal: I hope that made the cut.

*off scene*

bunny: How did that happen? He was already dead.

Cool Evil: It's cool to have doubles.

silver: How did you get here?

Cool Evil: Cause I'm cool.

13: Now that you're here though you no longer exist. You become one of us.

Cool Evil: Okay. What do you do here.

OOCat: Mostly make fun of people.

Cool Evil: That's cool.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-27-06, 06:43 PM		Cool Evil: Unfortunately *gurgle* I'm not Dramatic Evil or I could do that *snap* whole death-curse thing. *slump*
*******
NJ26 is picking the lock to Weylin's cell.

NJ26: You'd think with everything they're doing, they could at least remember to break you out of jail.

Weylin: :weep: (OOC: I don't know why I'm not up to giving Weyling dialogue.)

The lock finally clicks. NJ26 pushes the door in. Weyling is standing there, the bonds that were holding him in wolf form have fallen off, but he's clutching a ragged blanket around his waste.

NJ26: :blush: Gotta get someone to invent transforming clothes for you.
*******
Meanwhile, in a deep part of the castle where Count Evillo hid his "last-ditch backup" device, we find Erk working furiously on something ticking.

Erk: Bombs. Why is everything about bombs these days?
*******
OOcat: You are not allowed to do commentary. It's about the only thing I get to do around here.

OOurial: Can I have Cool Evil?

OOcat: Knock yourself out.

OOC: I don't mean to be mean, but 13, Bunny, Silver, and OOcat commenting are just about the only thing I get to do most of the time. If you want to comment, use your own characters.
rampant

08-27-06, 07:09 PM		Satnak - (i.h.h. I hate it when my opponent talk themself up, then dissapoints me with this crap.)

Count Evillo - (i.h.h. i got her i'm gonna kill the brerry cherry rasberry)

Satnak's beam slices through the breath weapon of the dragon and into its brain case. The already released energy batters her body.

Satnak - I was gonna have to rebuild that anywaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrggggggggg .

------------------------

OOC: This is the last of the evolution scenes I promise.
urial angel of death

08-27-06, 07:21 PM		The little blue girl walks up to NJ26.

girl: Here are the keys to his cell and a suitable robe.

NJ26: Where did you get these?

girl: I pocketed them while Kaine was well... :embarrass

NJ26: Sorry I shouldn't have asked.

-----

*back with Rose and V.*

V: I've rigged this entire place with pholly's alchemist's fire. *hands Rose a button* It is all tied to that. Make sure not to press it until we are out safely.

Rose: (i.h.h.) Must press button!
Sir Elton

08-27-06, 07:26 PM		Marish batted her eyes. Halharath looked unconcerned. "Come with us," Marish says, "Please?"

"No," Halharath said.

"I'll cover you in whipped cream and lick it off," Marish said.

"No."

"Please . . . please . . . pleassee."

"No, none of your pouting is going to do you any good," said Halharath. A semi-solid blade of energy leaped from his palm and he grasped it. It was the length of a longsword and it hummed like something awful.

Marish felt afraid looking at the soulknife and his mighty, green mind blade. "Please, come with us on the Forgotten Freedom," she pouted.

"Marish," Halharath explained, "I made a commitment and I intend to keep it. I intend to find Draj and Sword. They are somewhere, but I don't know where. Metrol was the last place we were together, battling the Lord of Blades.

"After the battle, we were separated. I found my way to Karrnath, the other two are out there somewhere. I can't join your crew because I can't stand your crew. Simply because the Forgotten Freedom is responsible for the destruction of my village. You don't want me, get some other shmuck."

Halharath caused his blade to disappate and then sauntered away from Marish, confidently and stoically. Marish looked at the Kalashtar as he continued to glide off the hill until he was out of her sight.

Marish looked about until a towering Warforged looked down on her. "Hello, did you see a Kalashtar glide off of his hill?" he boomed.

Marish looked at him and said, "Uh, why?"

"Because, the Lord of Blades wants to settle an old score," said the Warforged.

"What is your name?"

"Some Other Shmuck."

Marish then jumped up in the air and said: "Yippy!!! Come with me, Some Other Shmuck, on aboard the Forgotten Freedom and we can pillage and plunder and do some nasty despicable things and make Queen Aurala look foolish!"

Some Other Shmuck then put his finger to his chin and thought. "Okay."

"Yippeeee!" Marish leaped into his arms and then they disappeared in a flash. Halharath looked up and said, "Hmm. I wonder why the Lord of Blades wants to fight me anyway."
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-27-06, 07:32 PM		Inevitable Dispatcher: *ksssh* Okay, we have reports of a 142. Repeat, a 142. Name: Sir Elton. Over. *beep*

Dram'madar 55485967: *beep* On my way. Over.
Sir Elton

08-27-06, 07:33 PM		Note: I present Some Other Shmuck. Some Other Smuck is a Warforged who works for the Lord of Blades. He's Neutral Evil, although he does whatever the Lord of Blades tells him to do. He is Marish's new toy boy, even though he is a living construct.
[NE Male Personality Warforged Fgtr 6/Blkguard 2]

Halharath narrowly managed to escape Marish's pouting and becoming her new toy boy simply because she rolled a natural 1 while batting her eyelashes.
Gladius_Lucix

08-27-06, 07:36 PM		Liam runs up next to Rose, wands ready.

Liam: You have no excuse unless the button is shiny and red.

Rose: It is.

Liam: Carry on, then.

Liam dashes for the nearest exit.
rampant

08-27-06, 07:45 PM		Back on Board.

Serene - Where is Satnak?

Terra - (exhausted) I don't know, I can't keep track of her away from the ship. She's too fast.

Lisa - She's probably okay, anything that would actually hurt her would be kind of hard to miss.

A bright pillar of twisting energy blasts forth in the distance.

Lisa - :surrender Like that.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-27-06, 07:46 PM		Elina: Button... :drool:

Sarah: Shiny button... :drool:

Elina: Shiny, RED button... :drool:

Elina & Sarah: I CALL DIBS! :D

Rose: NO! It's mine! :fight!:

OOC: Because it's funny, that's why.

Eled, if you want to sig something I said, you're more than welcome to. I'm thinking about putting Ash's line in my own. :D
rampant

08-27-06, 09:10 PM		Satnak - RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

Serene - Whats wrong:confused: :weep: ?

Satnak - hissssh this is it, the last stage.

Serene - I hate to see you hurting like this:weep:

Satnak - Shhhhhhh i'll be hhsshhh fine.

Serene - Silly, silly girl.

Satnak - :P , Serene I -gAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHGK

The grey line patterns on her skin pulse as her internal chemical and bio-mechanical systems finish rearranging themselves replacing, the natural materials of her body with strong, lighter, more flexible, or just more efficient compounds.

Satnak - (exhausted) its done, Serene look at my eyes please.

Serene - (about three steps ahead already) what happened they look almost normal,...although I don't think anyone but Ketty or Tirmek has ever had that kind of intensity in just their eyes.

Satnak - These are my natural eyes, the crystals were a second set of eyelids, I formed the shield first so i could adjust them and tinker with them until this point when I made the the crystal lenses fully retractable.

Serene - They're beautiful.

Satnak - :embarrass ...I want to say something else. Serene, I ... I love you.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-27-06, 09:14 PM		Note: I present Some Other Shmuck. Some Other Smuck is a Warforged who works for the Lord of Blades. He's Neutral Evil, although he does whatever the Lord of Blades tells him to do. He is Marish's new toy boy, even though he is a living construct.
[NE Male Personality Warforged Fgtr 6/Blkguard 2]

Halharath narrowly managed to escape Marish's pouting and becoming her new toy boy simply because she rolled a natural 1 while batting her eyelashes.
OOC: Just remember that Marish will be pregnant for 9 months.
******
Satnak - ...I want to say something else. Serene, I ... I love you.
Silver: Show of hands, people who didn't know that?
****
OOC: Some fun quotes I picked up fromt he Mutants&Masterminds 's website:
"Paging Dr. Frankenstein... Dr. Frankenstein, you are wanted in surgery to remove your brain..."

"Now be quiet, I am about to do something stupid again."

"I AM THE CHOSEN ONE!"
"Who the **** keeps choosing you people?!??!"
rampant

08-27-06, 10:21 PM		Robrands raises his hand.

Crowd stares

Robrands - What :mad: I thought the attraction was purely physical on Satnak's part.
------------------------------------

Serene - I love you too, you silly girl, what took you so long to figure it out?

Satnak - :embarrass :cloud9: I was scared.

Serene - Of what, it had better no be my claws Ms. Elite Warrior.

Satnak - No I think your claws are cute, its just the last time I ...I said those words I got shot down. "Lets just be sisters" bloody mol that hurt.

Serene - Well thats in the past, lets focus on the future.

Satnak - OH BLOODY, !! Tell me Terra, Lisa, and the kids got out ok!!

Serene - Yes their fine. Now Come here and lets get back...

Satnak - ...zzz...

Serene - Last time Silly girl.:) ;)
cypher_zero

08-27-06, 10:21 PM		"I AM THE CHOSEN ONE!"
"Who the **** keeps choosing you people?!??!"
Dear god that's hilarious! That's going in my sig.
.
Sir Elton

08-27-06, 10:33 PM		OOC: Just remember that Marish will be pregnant for 9 months.

Warforged don't have reproductive parts. :)
rampant

08-27-06, 10:52 PM		Terrek - So she finally said it.

Serene - Yes, she did:cloud9: :bounce: .

Terrek - So why is she in your room here?

Serene - She passed out from the transformation's completion, our door was closer than hers, even with the lighter alloys she's hard to drag around.

Terrek - heh...
--------------------------------

Satnak - wah..HUh?! Serene!

Serene - Right here my love.

Satnak - Why are we in your room? Did we .....:blush:

Serene - :heehee no, not yet. Or was that an invitation.;)

Satnak - :embarrass
--------------------------------

Lisa - Well finally.

Terra - The crystal goggles made it hard to tell, but the way her lips curled whenever she thought you weren't looking.

Satnak - :embarrass

Sarah - Does this mean your gonna be Aunt Serene.

Serene - How about Auntie.

Elina - yay! auntie Serene *hug*

Sarah - Don't hog her *hug*

Satnak - Hey you two let go of my girlfriend. ;)

Terra & Lisa - :rofl:

Serene - :)

Satnak - (puts on serious face) I also wanted to say I'm sorry for scaring you.

Elina and Sarah - You were just protecting us, we still Like You Aunt Satnak.

Satnak - and you?... Lisa ..Terra
Kaizer_Ryu

08-27-06, 10:53 PM		Silver: Show of hands, people who didn't know that?
If I remember correctly, Satnak hasn't actually said that till now. More of a "she finally said it" moment than a "gasp!" moment. :)

IC:

Rose: Now, listen, cadets. I've got a job for you. *Elina & Sarah run over* See this button?

*holds up the remote*

*they reach for it*

Rose: DON'T TOUCH IT! It's the CASTLE DESTROYER button you FOOLS!

Elina: So, what'll happen?

Rose: That's just it. We don't know. Maaaaaybe something bad? Maaaaaybe something good! I guess we'll never know! Because you're going to guard it! You won't TOUCH it, will you?

Shaking their heads, they salute. Rose walks away, laughing softly to himself.

Narrator: Oh, how long can trusty Cadets Elina and Sarah hold out? How can they possibly resist the diabolical urge to push the button that could erase the castle and it's surroundings from existence? Will their tortured minds give in to their uncontrollable desires?

*holds the controller to their faces*

Narrator: Can they resist the temptation to push the button that, even now, beckons them even closer? Will they succumb to the maddening urge to eradicate a portion of the countryside? *waves it back and forth before thier eyes* At the MERE...PUSH...of a SINGLE...BUTTON! The beeyootiful, SHINY button! The jolly CANDY-LIKE button! Will they hold out, folks? CAN they hold out?

Elina & Sarah: NO WE CAN'T!!!! *they push the button*

*SKUGGGAAAFOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM*

Elina & Sarah: SWEEEEEEEEEET!!!!!!

Narrator: Tune in next week as-

Chalky: Hey! Another one! They're just coming out of the woodwork, lately. I wonder how you taste with Sweet & Sour sauce?

Narrator: Wha-GAHHHH!! MY LEG! OH, THE AGONY!!! NO, NO, NOT MY SPINE!!! AUGH!!!! WHAT ARE YOU HACKING OFF?!! IS IT MY TORSO?! IT IS!! MY PRECIOUS TORSO!!!

Cuddles: *points at the narrators spleen* Are you gonna eat that?

Chalky: I get the rest of him, so help yourself.

Sarah: :( I wonder if our mommies will be mad that we blew up a 10 mile radius of Valenar...

Elina: It was worth it. :D

Sarah: Totally. That explosion was SO COOL!!!! :D

OOKaizer: This blatant ripoff brought to you by Dragonmeat Den. Catch both references and win a cupon for the all you can eat special*.

* Winners must present cupon before eating. All food must be caught and killed by the winner and their guests. Hunting policy is BYOW (Bring Your Own Weapon). No plagues or curses, please.
rampant

08-28-06, 12:58 AM		Lisa - Of course, we forgive you, you were doing what either one of us probably would have. Though the skinning people alive was a bit excessive.

Terra - No, thowing salt on them afterwards was.

Satnak - Sorry.

Sarah - I wanna see Fluffy

Elina - Yay Kitty

Satnak - Alright, lets go find my flakey feline.
----------------------

Serene - Ok Father, how is the gate coming.

Terrek - Allen has the main structural beams taken care of, and is now assisting Ketler with the Joints and fold points. We've had to modify the designs some what since only Sa'vor and Naz'roth have any clue how to make the crystal components, but they assure me that it will still function as intended with the added benefit of keeping the wier/insan warp from interefering with the primary function of the gate. Liam has found and is marking the point in the crossing we need to align with the island gate. The Crystal components should be finished tommorrow, and the rest of the gate soon after, assuming those joint pieces ever get finished. Tricky little buggers those things.
cypher_zero

08-28-06, 01:05 AM		Terrek: Actually, I've been working on something along a similar premise for some time now - though on a much grander scale. If this gate works as it's supposed to, then it means that I can move ahead to the next step with my own plans.
.
rampant

08-28-06, 01:55 AM		248. Just because you get called "that spoony bard" does not mean you get to devote yourself to a dark quasi-deific force and call yourself the Drab lord. In order to extract a hideous revenge.

249. People like most bards.

250. Except the spoony ones.

251. Serene is not the Spoony bard.

252. She is the beautiful love interest type bard.

253. Too bad for you losers, She's Satnak's love interest.

254. Devon is not the Spoony bard.

255. He is the pathetic bard.

256. Yes that means your the spoony bard.

257. No you may not extract a horrible revenge because everyone calls you Spoony.

258. Even if you do it without the dark quasi-deific, and/or claiming the title "Drab Lord"

259. No 30 megawatt plasma cannons.

230. Thats the crew's job.
-----------------

OOC: 2 chickens to the one who can figure out where thats from.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

08-28-06, 08:44 AM		( ooc Kyzer I'd be honored to be sigged by you :tiphat: )

Ash is back on the forgotten fredom in his natural shape again, basking in the glorius conflageration that engulfs the Valenar castle. Curled into one arm is Marish purring hapily. The other leans aginst his T-rex's foot.

Ash "Life on this vessel dosent get any-"

Fluffy "All you face am belong to me!" *pounces like a face hugger*

Ash "Muffled protests"

*****
New charicter: Dino the wakened T-rex/Monk. Quote 'Arfarfarf [I]ARF!'
Dino was untill recently an ordinary riding Trex traned bly Claz, but his participation in the Psichic robot ninja pirate with heat vison who is also riding a dinosaur events has changed him. Having become fircly loyal to Ash Dino is normay playfull and overly enthusiastic, awaiting the call of his master to become th ultimate force of coolness once again.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-28-06, 09:50 AM		Warforged don't have reproductive parts. :)
OOC: This is the Forgotten Freedom. Give me time.
******
NJ26: Has anyone seen Erk?

Lucky: He said something about making sure Kaine's castle didn't explode before everyone got out.
******
In the deep, underground ruins of Prince Kaine's castle.

Erk: Ow.
rampant

08-28-06, 10:45 AM		Terrek - I think its almost done just one last joint piece, and.....

Bwafoom

Terrek - (with singed face) Ok I should've seen that coming.

Sa'vor - Yeah the rest of us hiding behind you should have been a tip-off.

Liam - Anyway I think its finished.

You have never seen a more patchwork gate. The Main structre is formed of blue and black adamant beams the shape is that of a large hollow sphere with a door on it. The joints are made in a variety of styles out of almost every imaginable material, including one that seems to be simply welded. the crystal spires that encircle it are all different colors and shapes.

Sa'vor - This is what happens when you put 5 crafters in a room with blueprints none of them could actually follow.

Knock knock

Naz'roth - Come in, we're done.

Satnak peeks in and rushes off to gather up Terra, Lisa, Sarah, Elina, and Serene.

While She's out the portal starts humming.

Liam - Someone'scoming through.

Obligitory sequence of beeping and sparking.

Kratwe - Well well so this is the Forgotten Freedom.

Tolos - Indeed, I was expecting more drunk louts, less dingy.

Sivic (weretiger-human wild-runner 10/ ranger 10/ nomad 15) - Get off my feet.

Ken'baroque (Duskblade 10/ Shadow adept 10/ Noctumancer 17) - This is a Workshop not the Deck.

Kratwe - And who are you lot?
Kaizer_Ryu

08-28-06, 10:47 AM		In the deep, underground ruins of Prince Kaine's castle.

Erk: Ow.
Elina: Sorry, Erk. :(

Sarah: We were told everyone was out. :(

Erk: *coughs up black smoke* I hate the Shiny Red Button effect.
--------
Somewhere in the Eldeen Reaches.

Terra: *shaking her head* Girls, please.

Lisa: *sigh* Don't climb on the Awakened Greatpine...

Oalian: They're not hurting me - Ow! - too bad...

Lilly: It's not like you never did.

Terra: :D :blush:

Feralyn: I'm just glad you brought them to visit. They're just precious.

Oalian: Ow!

Lilly: Not to mention a pair of scamps. :D

Lisa: You're enjoying this, aren't you?

Feralyn: You bet. Turn about is fair play. Terra gave the lot of us trouble to no end.

Lilly: She and that Rose boy loved to prank diplomats. It's hard to work on treaties when you have 2 foot cockroaches appearing in the other parties pants.

Terra: Wait...Rose?

Feralyn: Yeah. A Half-Elf boy you used to hang out with. You were both orphans, so you got along well.

A look of combined realization, horror, surprise, and amusement crosses Terra's face.

Terra: THAT'S WHERE!!!

Lisa: *anime sweatdrop* What...?

Oalian: Ow!

Terra: It's been bugging me since forever where I've seen Captain Rose before. Even when we were working together, I could never quite put my finger on it.

Lilly: He's your Captain? What happened to Jarlot?

Lisa: Retired. Captain Rose is his adopted nephew.

Feralyn: *smiling amusedly* That is just too funny.

Terra: *groan* I wonder if he remembers. Maybe that's why he was so good at persuading me...

Oalian: Ow!

OOC: Thanks to Charles Phipps for the idea. You can take this where you want.
rampant

08-28-06, 11:32 AM		Satnak - Sorry to interrupt, but they're here and Kratwe is the impatient type. I hate this time distortion, doe my nephew even know who I am? Grrrr. Sorry about the Rambling its just these entrance exams always make me nervous, even when I'm not in the hot seat.

Olian - ....Off you.

Satnak - Don't get your pinecones in a knot.
Gladius_Lucix

08-28-06, 11:56 AM		Kratwe - And who are you lot?

Liam: My name is Liam d'Ghallandha, B.S. Magi. Sci., Wiersan Engineer, Artificer, and Innovator. I'm one of the five technicians who built the gateway on this side. I'll allow the others to introduce themselves.
Lord Kale Fangblade

08-28-06, 12:50 PM		Naz'roth:*bows* And I am Naz'roth of Legion, Daemon Lord and Mage Smith

Sa'vor: I am Sa'vor D'vol, Warlock and Warrior.
rampant

08-28-06, 01:08 PM		Sivic and Kratwe - :mymy: :blink: :shocked: :OMG! :bounce: NAz'Rothreallyyourthelegendarymastersmit hoohoohpleasecaniseeyourworkshoppleasedo youhaveanythingforsaleorevenjustdisplayt heguysbackhomearegonnabesooooooojealous.

Naz'roth - *anime sweat drop*

Allen - HE HAS OTAKU!!!

Ketler - Jeeze whats a guy gotta make to get a little recognition.
Gladius_Lucix

08-28-06, 02:09 PM		Ketler - Jeeze whats a guy gotta make to get a little recognition.
Liam: Be skilled, maybe? :P

Liam turns and begins to speak to the guests.

Liam: I doubt you would need it, but do you think that the Island could do with a free, <mumble mumble>*, source of energy? Or would it be better to talk to Forbes or Levy about that?

*Excluding liscensing costs, installation fees, and servicing contract.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-28-06, 02:49 PM		Rose: Well, I've now defeated my nemesis, avenged my father's death, rescued my hot wife, and made two children blow up 10 miles of Valenar. It's time for a celebretory drink!

Rose walks out of his office and proceeds to Erk's Place. Now, with the extradimensional properties of the bar and the chaotic nature of the structure of the FF, the door to Erk's Place is scattered quite randomly about the ship. This is quite handy in that one doesn't have to go all the way down to, say, the engine room, for a drink. The unfortunate side is simple causality physics: two people enter at the same time and they might merge into one; a person leaving might split between two or more doors. But this being the Forgotten Freedom their's either a solution aboard or no one cares enough.

However, today Rose couldn't find the door. Jarlot had seen fit to write down every spot on a map in his office, and Rose followed every direction. No doors. No sign. No sound of bar patrons floating through the corridors. Rose even went down to the place on the lowest decks, where the half-bicuits and half-toasters were still fighting their millenia-old war, but no bar.

Rose: Ah, well, that's a shame. Guess I'll just have to dip into my private stash. Igor………No, no, wait, I forgot, Igor won't serve me until I prove myself to be as mayhemic as Jarlot.

Bunny: Jarlot was able to cause more mayhem tipsy than you can stone drunk.

Silver: Walking all over you is like having plush carpet.

13: If you're lucky you'll get a footnote on his statue.

Bunny: Now if you'll excuse us…

All three pop into a different frame wearing capes and masks.

Bunny: …Team Commentary has a job to do!

OOC: Where has Erk's Place gone? What's with the Commentators' odd behavior? Will anyone give a damn? Tune in next week…
urial angel of death

08-28-06, 04:52 PM		OOC: It's what Rydia calls Edward in Final Fantasy 4. Though I never remember him devoting himself to a quasi-deific force or calling himself drab lord. He did however give a whole new meaning to the word suck.

Also because my gaming group didn't get together and they Kaizer and Rei didn't meet "him" he was not introduced.

-------
IC:

Volrath: I think I forgot something very important, but can't remember what it was.

-------
*in the charred remains of Kaine's castle*

Kaine's corpse is horribly burned and blasted in a few places, but still has a generally humaniod shape to it. His stomach rips apart. Out of the hole it just created crawls a four armed insectiod looking humaniod. It lifts its head into the air and lets out a tremendous screech.

-------
Volrath: Couldn't have been that important.

-------
A knock comes to Terra and Lisa's door. Lisa answers it. Outside is a young boy of around twelve.

Boy: Greeting ma'am. My name is Gregory and I am paladin in training. I was wondering if you would take me as your squire.

OOC: Dun dun dun... Kaizer your turn. Yes I have something very big planned.
rampant

08-28-06, 06:01 PM		OOC: Urial gets :chicken:, he got the right spoony bard, but didn't figure out where the rest came from. Get the rest here http://captainsnes.com/
---------------------------------

Satnak - Hey guys, brought the two little terrors and their 'rents.

Kratwe & Sivic - but...

Ken'barouqe - NO!

Tolos - GET YER REARS IN GEAR THERE'S ANOTHER SQUAD COMING THROUGH.

Satnak - Wait a minute, a Breaker, a Berserker, a Teacher, and a Neeker, whats left?:confused:

Sparking and beeping

Ketty - Hello sister its been a while on our end, I thought you might like to see how your nephew was doing.

Tirmek - Greetings Aunt Satnak.

Tirmek (1/2 nazarune Rakshasa/ 1/4 elf incarnate4/Warblade1/erudite1) looks to be a short 8 years old. His hands have the reversed palms signature of his Rakshasa heritage, and his upper body is covered in the short black fur of a panther. His cat-like face and fangs, combined with his steady bespectacled brown-eyed stare, and sages robes creates an effect of preternatural cunning and insight.

Satnak - Tirmek, bloody Mol I've missed so much.

Tirmek - No blame can be placed, it simply is what happened. Besides I intend to attend the Academy as well.

Tolos - The boy did well, I have never seen such an intellect in one so young.

Kratwe - He was up against a massive maze, with acid ozing out the walls. He figures out the chemical composition of the acid and nuetralizes it with something in that bag of his that makes a puffy foam or something and he uses that to mark his path.

Tolos - It was simply concentrated hydrochloric with a few catalysts to make it more fast acting.

Ketty - (sees look on Lisa and Terra's faces) Don't worry about your kids, the nature of the challenge is based on the capabilities of those taking the test. Your children are in no extraordinary danger.

Tolos - Do you wish to begin immediatly or do have questions?
Gladius_Lucix

08-28-06, 06:35 PM		Liam continues trying to sell a Weirsan Converter to the Academy representatives.

Liam: Satnak, you're one of the Big Three over there. Do you think the Academy could make use of Weirsan Energy? I'm sure that the others generate, if not as much Weirsan as you, but nearly the same, so it could be used as some sort of training dummy, scaling output to that of the user. Maybe I could even head over and talk to Forbes and Levy.
rampant

08-28-06, 06:50 PM		Satnak - Not now Liam, Sarah and Elina first. I'll take a look at your prints, you have blue prints right?, when the guys are setting up the challenge. As the kids' sponsor I'm not allowed near there during set up anyway.

Sivic - We got some work to do setting up so we'll put the thing together and you can talk to us when we're through, but before the test ok?

Terra - Probably best we just finished something major here so we need a moment to sort out our questions.

Ken'Baroque - MAy I ask who this is.

Serene - My name is Serene.

Ketty - Don't get any Ideas O' great Slayer of Wizards. She's My little Sister's wife.

Serene - What?:confused:

Satnak - HUH?:confused: :mad:
Sir Elton

08-28-06, 07:15 PM		Some Other Shmuck* walked around the ship and found some quarters for him. Sort of reminded him of the Mournland, since it was, well, a piece of Limbo projecting itself on the ship. "Duh, what in the world am I doing on the Forgotten Freedom?" asked SOS of himself. "I'm supposed to take one Halharath for a one on one duel of blades with my Lord. Now, I'm transported here and I have no where to go."

Rose was wandering the corridors of the Forgotten Freedom when he found Some Other Shmuck, the clueless Warforged, looking in one the quarters. "You are who?"

"I'm Some Other Shmuck," said SOS. "I was susposed to escourt some serious Kalashtar Soulknife to my Lord of Blades for a duel of the Blades. But I ended up here with some cat girl named Marish and now I don't know where I am.

"I hope you don't mind, but can you point me to Halharath? My Lord of Blades has challenged him to a most henious duel between Mindblade and his steel blades."

Rose then asked, "Whose Halharath?"

"He's a Kalashtar about yay high," SOS was explaining to Rose. "He is about this wide, has black long hair, a sculpted body, wearing white pants, sandals, and a long open robe with no shirt underneath. He can project a green mindblade about the length of a longsword.

"He's Chaste, virginal, merciful, just, earnest, kind, benevolent, . . "

Rose then said, "Stop it! STOP IT! NO ONE'S THAT GOOD!"

SOS then said lazily, "This one is."

"Great, well . . ." Rose thought about this for a moment. "You're among friends. Who did you say your Lord is?"

SOS replied dryly, "The Lord of Blades."

Rose then thought. "And you say this Halharath has an appointment to duel the Lord of Blades?"

"Yes."

"Well, we better make sure he doesn't miss his appointment. Where can we find the Lord of Blades?"

"In the Mournland."

Rose then thought and thought. "Well, looks like we have a duel to arrange."

"I guess so," said SOS.

"In the meantime, would you like a spot of tea?"

SOS then said, "I never consume tea. But can you point me to Marish?"

Rose then laughed. "Do you think that our Resident Companion actually wants to see you?"

--------------------------------------------------
O.C.C.: SOS means Some Other Shmuck. Use S.O.S. for short.
And yes, he's not only Neutral Evil, but he has a low Wisdom score.
Gladius_Lucix

08-28-06, 07:29 PM		Satnak - Not now Liam, Sarah and Elina first. I'll take a look at your prints, you have blue prints right?, when the guys are setting up the challenge. As the kids' sponsor I'm not allowed near there during set up anyway.

Liam: Blueprints? Sure, I've got blueprints.

Liam runs off to draw blueprints, and figure out exactly how the Weirsan Converter works.

In the Lab

Liam: Now, would it be easier to take one apart and draw from that, or to build a new one and draw as I go? There's got to be an easier way, some spell or infusion to generate a blueprint of any item...

Liam digs through the paper on his desk, trying to find a blank sheet to draw schematics on. Something started beeping, and Liam looked over his shoulder to see the Map indicating a surge of Weirsan in the lab. Deciding that he'd look into it later, he continued pawing through the paper. As he looked, he found a sheet that looked like blueprints. Pulling it out, he saw that it was a complete and accurate set of blueprints, schematics, and arcane diagrams of the Weirsan Converter.

Liam: :confused: I don't remember drawing these. Must be getting forgetful.

Liam rolls up the plans and hurries back to speak with Satnak again.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-28-06, 09:37 PM		OOC: Ok, the timeline for this is gonna be all screwed up (damn, only took six pages for that to happen again). For now, I'm gonna assume that everything involving Gregory takes place after the test.

Boy: Greeting ma'am. My name is Gregory and I am paladin in training. I was wondering if you would take me as your squire.
Lisa: Well...huh. I'm not entirely sure what to make of this.

Gregory: How so?

Lisa: This is the Forgotten Freedom. This isn't really the first place I'd think anyone would look for a Paladin...

OOC: Ok, urial, Q&A time. She's gonna want to know all the why's (there are plenty), more about him, Terra's gonna be interested in this, etc. You obviously have something in mind, so I guess I'll let her play along for now. Just remember, I know where you live. :D :P

Tolos - Do you wish to begin immediatly or do have questions?
Terra: Well, one question comes to mind. How do you determine capabilities? The power signature is a bit skewed with these two.

Lisa: Also, what are the criteria for this test?
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-28-06, 09:45 PM		Bunny: Also, do you have…

Team Commentary strikes a pose.

Bunny (echoy masculine voice): …SUPERHERO TRAINING?

Tolos: :uh-huh: Well, there is a Professor X………Wait, why would I mention Prof X specifically? :confused: Nothing's special enough to bring him up now. Except that he hangs out with that Karrnathi shifter with adamantine claws…
Charles Phipps

08-28-06, 11:41 PM		Rose: Well I admit, I do like spooning.

Zella: I don't believe that's what they mean.

Rose: In any case, we are at last reunited my love!

Zella: You screwed up rescuing me.

Rose: Oh NOT THIS AGAIN!

Zella: Are you a handsome Prince? No. Did you defeat a dragon to beat me? No, someone else did. Alway getting other people to do your work for you! Sheesh!

Rose: Oh brother.

Zella: And I won't point out that you STILL haven't apologized for the vampiress in karrnath.

Rose: She meant nothing to me!
cypher_zero

08-28-06, 11:48 PM		As Rose and Zella walk by, they notice a new sign haning by the rules and other notices.

Billboard: Need love advice? Help finding the perfect mate? See Terrek for all your relationship needs! Available 24/7.

OOC: Well, the idea just sorta came to me that Terrek could be a "matchmaker." I mean, he set up Serene and Satnak right? Take this where you wish or nowhere at all. Just make sure you re-fill the tank afterwards. Gas is expensive. No, I'm not crazy. I just do what the voices tell me.
.
luna18moon

08-28-06, 11:58 PM		Slaypaw and Fluffy lurk in the shadows above Norbaz's kitchen.
Slaypaw: ATTACK!
Slaypaw proceeds to claw at his shoulders, distarcting him, while Fluffy aims carefully to try and delver a knockout blow.
Fluffy: Hiyah!
Norbaz falls to the ground, unconscious.
Slaypaw::D Ours, Ours, it's all ours! :D
Slaypaw shifts to halfling form and grabs ten jars of catnip off the shelves.
Slaypaw: Come on, let's go!
They run back to Satnaks room, Slaypaw shoving the jars into a bag and shifting back. Once they get there, Slaypaw barely has time to get the bag off and look for a place to hide it before Sarah bursts in.
Sarah: KITTIES! :D :love:
Cats: :eek:
Sir Elton

08-29-06, 12:35 AM		Billboard: Need love advice? Help finding the perfect ate? See Terrek for all your relationship needs! Available 24/7.
.

SOS was also walking by, when he noticed the billboard. "A perfect ate?" he thought to himself. "Oh, a perfect mate!. What do I need a mate for, I don't have anything to do with."

SOS scratched his head. He started looking for Terrek. "Uh, Terrek? Terrek? Where are you?"

SOS started calling for Terrek until he bumped into another Warforged. One who is brimming with weapons. "Oh excuse me, I didn't know you were there."

Stupid, who was the warforged looked up. "Satisfactory . . . Who are you?"

This time, SOS got a good look. "MY LORD!" SOS reverently exclaimed as he got down on his hands and knees. "My Lord of Blades, I'm so . . . what happened to you?"

"My name is THX-1138," said Stupid. "I . . . Must . . . Kill . . . All . . . Beings . . . Who . . . "

SOS then got up and said, "I thought you sent me to find Halharath."

"HAL-Good morning Dave," said Stupid. "I think I'll sing . . . "

SOS hurried down the hall to escape Stupid's gloriously ineffable singing that could not be matched. SOS then saw Terrek. "Hi, I'm looking for Terrek," said SOS.
rampant

08-29-06, 01:06 AM		Tolos - Well we start by determining the level of skew, then compensate, we work with weights, jammers, and yes even the occasional seal quite a bit so we have plenty of practice.

Ken'baroque - 3 seals down, 2 more disintigrating as we speak, when did you place them.

Terra - Soon after they were born.

Sivic - Sheesh I can see why, just looking at you two. Opposing outsider infusion intertwined and boosted with unique shadow power, and latent lycanthropy. The family tree must read like a menagerie. ...NO offense intended.

Kratwe - The big thing we test is their ability to use their power to accomplish a specific goal. The kids will be allowed an amount of gear based on a value limit, in addition no one item can be above a certain power level. Certain abilities like wish or miracle or the like are banned. The gear will be checked and cleared before set up, and parents, and sponsors are banned from the site. We have to be Nice to you guys, anyone else gets a beating.

Sivic, Kratwe, Tolos, and Ken'baroque - AND NO OUTSIDE HELP!!!

Elina is valiantly trying to restrain herself.

Tirmek - :rolleyes: Oh fine go ahead.

Elina - Kitty! *scrachtes behind right furry half-elf ear*

Sarah - *holding Fluffy* :D

Lady comes in riding quench.

Lady - Kitty!

Qunch - Arf!

Tirmek - Oh no not bug-girl.

Lisa - Where is Satnak?

Terra - Ketty dropped the whole Married bombshell remember?

Lisa - Their gonna have to explain that sometime.
----------------------------------

Satnak - WHAT?!

Ketty - Calm down sister, its not like this is an undesirable outcome.

Serene - Still I think I would remember the wedding?

Ketty - I would think so as well seeing as you pulled a pretty nifty piece of strategy on Tormos.

Satnak - He pulled the old "winner is wed line"!!?

Ketty - Weren't you there?

Satnak - Hello, was bound by Riven. I focused on keeping optical so I could see what was happening.

Serene - I thought there was some ceremony atleast.

Ketty - Normally there is you just misunderstood the situation, and Satnak was out. Since the Sirinon were occupied the normal pomp and parade was skipped but legally as far as most of our world is concerned, You are now Serene d'Borisheel.
cypher_zero

08-29-06, 07:03 AM		OOC: Whoa. Didn't see that one coming.

IC:

Terrek: (To SOS) I am he. What do you seek me for?
.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-29-06, 08:02 AM		Lady comes in riding quench.
Lady turns to Terra and Lisa.

Lady: 've you s'n mommie?

Terra: No, no we haven't seen your mommie.

Lady: Wher's mommie? :weep:

Terra: You mean you don't know?

Lady: M'mmie go away.
Sivic - Sheesh I can see why, just looking at you two. Opposing outsider infusion intertwined and boosted with unique shadow power, and latent lycanthropy. The family tree must read like a menagerie. ...NO offense intended.
Silver: None taken. :D

13: Don't worry, Lady dear, we know where your mommie is.

Bunny: Team Commentary knows where everyone is.

*superhero pose*

Lady: *happy screetch that cracks all mundane crystal within 30 ft.*
Sir Elton

08-29-06, 08:14 AM		OOC: Whoa. Didn't see that one coming.

IC:

Terrek: (To SOS) I am he. What do you seek me for?
.

SOS then asked, "You're Terrek? Can you find me true love?"
Sir Elton

08-29-06, 09:53 AM		Halharath was sauntering from the river crossing and into Rekkenmark. The city was not something he was prepared for. Aside from the skeleton patrols, Halharath peacefully continued to saunter to take a look at the people. Fortunately, everything was peaceful. Halharath then took a stroll in a Rekkenmarken park.

Halharath decided to sit down and take in the scenery. For the most part, Karrnath was a wonderful, green country. A bit chilly, though, as fall was knocking on the door and summer was marching out. However, circumstances changed when he saw two knights of Karrnath fighting eachother. One was wearing black field plate and the other was wearing not so black field plate. Halharath, who seemed to bend reality around him into the Realism of Iron Crown Enterprises' Arms Law, was not prepared for what happened next. The black clad knight slayed his foe with the mighty cleavation of his Greatsword. Pretty soon, the iron-clad knight had his chest and shoulders cleaved into two parts and he died.

The Black Knight picked up his mighty Great Sword and stood there staring. Halharath then walked up and said, "That was terribly gruesome."

The Black Knight responded, "It's a gruesome country."

"What did your enemy do," said Halharath.

"He looked at me crossways."

"That's all he did was look at you crossways?"

"Sure. And I defeated him."

"Why?"

"Because, I'm the Karrnathi Death Knight! I always win!"

"Do Karrnathi Death Knights always have to win?" asked Halharath.

"Yes," responded the Death Knight.

"Why?"

"Because, we have a reputation to uphold. You can't expect Death Knights to lose or else our reputation as fearsome beings between life and death will be damaged and then it will be work, work, work all the time."

"Have you heard of the Forgotten Freedom?"

The Karrnathi Death Knight then took a minute to think. "Yes, I believe so."

"What do you know about them?"

"I hate them with a passion."

"Why?"

"Because, they always have to come to Karrnath, poke fun at my Lord Liege Kaius and get into bed with Regent Moranna. So, I've been charged to find anyone connected with the Forgotten Freedom and bring them to Karrnathi Justice. Even though I'm chaotic and I'm evil."

Halharath then thought and said, "I need to get an audience with Kaius about two of my friends. Can you introduce me?"

The Death Knight then said, "Yes. I believe so. Why do you want to see the King anyway?"

"I wonder if King Kaius would know the whereabouts of two members of my family -- two soulknives, a Changeling named Draj and a Warforged named Sword."

"What do I get in return?"

Halharath threw him a crystalline portal key. "Here. Some cat girl dropped this outside the border of the Mournland. You can use it to get to the Forgotten Freedom."

"NICE!" said the Karrnathi Death Knight. "Follow me, then."

Halharath and the Death Knight sauntered off to an Orien rail line, in order to travel to Korth and to get Halharath an audience with King Kaius III.
Lord Kale Fangblade

08-29-06, 09:56 AM		Sa'vor moved through the shadows of the Lowest decks, the decks which where shunned even by ubers. the places where powerful energies warped and twisted creatures, where beings feeding off the residual energy from the ship prefered to hide. This was the deck that Many of the crews failed experiments where thrown down, the deepest of the darkest pits. there was not light, for none would dare walk this place. none but those whom had somthing to lose. Sa'vor glided over the ground like a wraith, A wand in his right hand.

Sa'vor stopped moving, his nose picking up a familiar smell. He tasted the air. yes, that familiar tangy metalic taste. he continued moving, but slower. before him the darkness faded to reveal the sight of one of the dezinens of this part of the ship. its form had been twisted and warped by the energies of this place. It was lying in a pool of blood, its chest torn open and organs scattered all around. huge larcerations covered its face and arms and many blood splats covered the wall. one was the wrong colour, it was red. the rest where green. Sa'vor placed a finger in the blood and licked a sample, he tasted the familiar taste of somthing like him. one with draconic liniage.

Sa'vor: (i.h.h) So it had passed this way, Well this would be the best place for it... it must be powerful to be able to kill somthing that dwelled here, that or lucky. or perhaps its clever?

In Sa'vors mind Images of the Mangled corpses of his bretherin appeared, torn apart. rended limb from limb. Then the images of more victims, their forms tourtured and their faces twisted into silent screams. Another series of images, of when they'd cornered it. and the bloodthirsty intesity of the way it destroyed almost a full four squards of his best troops and put Feal-Thas into Critical condition. Sa'vor felt a huge pulse of anger lance through him, he put it aside. there would be plenty of time for that later.

Sa'vor felt a rush of air behind him, he rolled. narrowly avioding being decapitated by a claw. Sa'vor jumped to his feet and firing the wand, the lightning bolt struck the wall where the creature had been. Sa'vor scanned the area, nothing. Blinding pain exploded in his shoulder blades, Sa'vor struck out with a eldritch blast. it struck the wall sending a rain of splinters in every direction. Sa'vor turned to see it charging towards him again, its claws already going through their deadly and fatal arc.

Sa'vor sent a lance of eldritch energy into the creature, knocking it back. The creature pulled itself up and retreated into the shadows, a thin trickle of blood leaving a trail behind it. Sa'vor smiled, at least he'd manged to put a tracing curse on it. Sa'vor plane shifted to his citadel Dimension, he sat down on a stone bench and shuddered. the claw had gone deep. very deep. Sa'vor removed his armour, Sa'vor's frowned slightly as he saw the back plate, Seven long claws had traced a long mark through it. He frowned even more. they cut through his armour like it wasnt there... Sa'vor smirked slightly, this would be even more fun than he had expected.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-29-06, 10:38 AM		The armies of The Cookie Monster and General Electric stood upon the field of battle, a lower deck that was way too big to exist on a ship this size, but, let's face it, this is the Forgotten Freedom we're talking about.

The Cookie Monster—a misshapen being formed out of all those little tiny lumps left over when you put the cookie stuff on the baking tray and it doesn't come out to much—bellowed in challenge, and his entire half-biscuit hoard roared with him.

General Electric stood there, calm, stoic, preparing mentally for the battle ahead. He was covered in new, shiny masterwork tinfoil armor to back up his already impressive stainless-steel exterior. The half-toaster road astride a majestic failed experiment that's too horrible to describe in words, but I could give it a go if you want.

There was a tense moment of silence before the storm.

Then General Electric drew his shapened bread knife and pointed it at the enemy.

The Cookie Monster roared again, and this time the half-biscuit hoard surged forward.

The half-toaster legionaires put their tower shields in front of them and lowered their longspears into position.

Unfortunately just at this moment Sa'vor's monster ran through, scaring everyone shtless, and requiring the battle to be rescheduled for next week.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-29-06, 11:06 AM		Sivic - Sheesh I can see why, just looking at you two. Opposing outsider infusion intertwined and boosted with unique shadow power, and latent lycanthropy. The family tree must read like a menagerie. ...NO offense intended.
Terra: Things like that are bound to happen when your breaking the chains of fate. The gigantic blind spot surrounding me and my family is driving the Diviners nuts. Believe me, Sivic, we take no offense at the near absurdity of our lineage. That's his fault. *points at OOKaizer*

OOKaizer: It's not like that was my original intention...

Tolos: I've heard about these guys. E.B.N.E. right? If I remember correctly, you can't do anything useful.

OOKaizer: Nope. :D
Sir Elton

08-29-06, 11:40 AM		OOC: This is the Forgotten Freedom. Give me time.
******


Oh, bother. Well, you might as well do your worst, SOS is looking for true love. Well, at least someone to be his toy girl.
urial angel of death

08-29-06, 12:44 PM		Gregory: I was seeking out you in particular. It wasn’t hard to find out that you lived aboard the Forgotten Freedom. I wish to apprentice under you ma’am because you are the most pious paladin I have ever heard of. You never once gave in to temptation even in a swill pool of villainy such as this. You have never committed even one act of evil of your own free will. I have idolized you ever since I first heard the stories. No matter what my teachers say you are the epitome of knighthood. In short you are everything I aspire to be.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-29-06, 02:40 PM		Oh, bother. Well, you might as well do your worst, SOS is looking for true love. Well, at least someone to be his toy girl.
OOC: That was just a friendly introduction to the humor of the Forgotten Freedom. Our motto is basically "Rules are made to be broken. With as much force as possible."
Crystalforged

08-29-06, 03:16 PM		Really? :confused: I thought it was something about insanity being more fun and requiring fewer rules. I must really be out of touch here... :P



By the way, Silver, I'm thinking of finally getting around to the wedding between Kanatash and Caralot. I have an (extremely vauge) idea for the wedding but all that is subject to change and any input from you (or anyone else really) is welcome. About the only part I have any real concrete plans for is Kanatash's half of the "meet the parents" bit. Lets just say it should be very "interesting."

Anyways the thing I wanted to ask you about was Caralot. We have some vauge information about her world and even less about her background. I was hoping you could flesh out her background a little better to make the wedding a little easier, you know childhood, parents, etc. I'd appreciate anything you can give me.

Oh, and lastly, just because I'm curious (and Kanatash has been bugging me), what exactly did Caralot DO during all those months she was absent from the ship?
Charles Phipps

08-29-06, 04:55 PM		*In Terrek's office where all sorts of diplomas are on the wall behind him*

Terrek: and you think your wife has unrealistic expectations on you Rose?

Zella: I want him to be a champion of justice. To save the world. To save me whenever I'm kidnapped. To be rich. To have his own kingdom. To also have us live happily ever after.

Rose: That I can do!

Zella: And to be faithful.

Rose: It's THAT kind of crazy talk that is always troubling me.

Terrek: Have you considered an evil alternate double?

Rose: Oh yeah, all the time.

Zella: One time, we vacationed in Silent Hill and he tried to smother me and ended up with a succubus in leather pants whom looked like me called Zellia.

Rose: I didn't try to smother you! I was just trying to stop your snoring!

Zella: It was payback for the whole Strahd Von Zharovich thing wasn't it?

Rose: You said you were kidnapped!

Zella: It was 2nd edition and Ravenloft touched all worlds then! He was charming, rich, and high level!

Terrek: I think I have the solution to your problems.

*pulls out a Headband of Opposite Alignment*

Terrek: You need to put this on and become your opposite in nearly every respect!

Rose: Oooooooo.

Zella: Are you sure you're licensed as a medical practioner?

Terrek: I never said I was. Now do you want him to change or not?

Zella: Gimme.

*Rose steps into a nearby booth and starts screaming as sounds of violence ensue*

Terrek: Our assistants are helping.

*Rose steps out then wearing Leather Armor, a headband, and covered in all sorts of exotic weaponry*

Vampire Hunter Rose: Behold, I am now a brooding angsty bishounen!

Zella: OOOOOOooooooooooooooooooo. Kiss me my love!

Vampire Hunter Rose: No time! I must...HUNT EVIL.

Terrek: That'll be 72 copper pieces for the first session.
rampant

08-29-06, 04:59 PM		Serene - :twitch: you mean to tell me :twitch: that this whole time :twitch: we could have been :pile: like bunnies on viagra, and we've just been hugging and kissing!!!

Satnak - :blink: :OMG! :blush:

Ketty - Quite the little firecracker you got there little sis.
-----------------------------------------

Volrath - Their setting up in the woods below, thats why the ship is in hover. I've marked the location on the map.

Elina - Why nothing else?

Volrath - They have highly effective defenses.

Sarah - You can't see them?

Volrath - Not so much that as every time I try the spell gets hijacked and all I can get is *shudder* showtunes.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-29-06, 05:12 PM		Really? :confused: I thought it was something about insanity being more fun and requiring fewer rules. I must really be out of touch here... :P
OOC: That's incorporated into that motto.
By the way, Silver, I'm thinking of finally getting around to the wedding between Kanatash and Caralot. I have an (extremely vauge) idea for the wedding but all that is subject to change and any input from you (or anyone else really) is welcome. About the only part I have any real concrete plans for is Kanatash's half of the "meet the parents" bit. Lets just say it should be very "interesting."

Anyways the thing I wanted to ask you about was Caralot. We have some vauge information about her world and even less about her background. I was hoping you could flesh out her background a little better to make the wedding a little easier, you know childhood, parents, etc. I'd appreciate anything you can give me.

Oh, and lastly, just because I'm curious (and Kanatash has been bugging me), what exactly did Caralot DO during all those months she was absent from the ship?
OOcat and OOCrystalforged stand before massive gates that say "EVERYTHING YOU COULD EVER POSSIBLY WANT TO KNOW CONCERNING CARALOT". OOcrystalforged is trying to open them.

OOcat: You sure you want to do that?

OOCrystalforged: Yeah. I need to know as much as I can about Caralot for the wedding. *grunt* Man, these things stick like a bad song in your head.

OOcat: Has it occured to you that there is a reason for that?

OOCrystalforged: Stop stalling and help me.

OOcat sighs, walks up to the gates, and swings them open.

Before them stands a vast wall of swirling pictures showing some world in the jumbled, mixed-up way of something that hasn't been polished yet.

OOCrystalforged: That's…… :blink: ………that's a whole lotta stuff.

The surface of the wall ripples violently.

OOcat: Whoops.

OOCrystalforged: Whoops? :confused: Please tell me that's not a bad thing…:(

The wall begins to swell in the middle like a supervolcano (OOC: which is an actual geological occurance).

OOcat (deteachedly): You see, it swells to fill the space provided, a bit like a gas, but with the density of water.

OOCrystalforged: :eek:

Alt-Eberron: *SPLOOSH!*

OOC: I'll get on it.
Charles Phipps

08-29-06, 05:32 PM		Sarah: Hi Uncle Rose!

Vampire Hunter Rose: Are you....EVIL?

Sarah: Uhhh...I don't think so.

Vampire Hunter Rose: Well I need to go hunt some evil so I can level up.

Sarah: Level up?

Vampire Hunter Rose: Are your parents teaching you anything? Basically, at heart all people in the world have levels of ability which boil down to how much damage they can deal as well as how much damage they can take. Everyone starts as a whimp but eventually those whom kill absurd numbers of people end up with the highest level. It's related to that Great Score thing I told you about.

Sarah: Uh...huh.

Vampire Hunter Rose: As a human being, I have to go around fighting huge numbers of small evil creatures in order to build up my levels so I can eventually go after the big ones. Thank goodness that I'm never going to encounter one of the big ones until I'm high enough level. Strangely, I only find opponents of comparable power to me as I travel along the world.

Sarah: Really?

Vampire Hunter Rose: Yeah, its weird. You'd think it strange the 13th level Skeletons wouldn't be encountered until I'm about 15th or 16th level myself.

Sarah: Why don't they just kill you when you're 1st level?

Vampire Hunter Rose: That's not how it works! In any case, I'm building up some last minute experience before I go hunt the evil King Kaius that is my father.

Sarah: Vampires can't have children.

Vampire Hunter Rose: Oh hush! I recieved some knowledge from the spirit of my dead mother.

Sarah: Your what in the what now?

Gaia: HEY GRAND DAUGHTER!

Sarah: The hell?
Crystalforged

08-29-06, 07:15 PM		Announcer: (in cool movie trailer voice) Will Crystalforged contain the devestation he has surely just unleashed?

OOCrystalforged: Naw.

Announcer: Well, then... Will Crystalforged regret releasing these terrible horrors upon the world?

OOCrystalforged: Nope.

Announcer: Er... Will Crystalforged ever react in any way to this new madness he has unleashed?

OOCrystalforged: You know you're getting kind of annoying.

Announcer: What will Crystalforged do next?

OOCrystalforged: Yo, Chalky!

Chalky: What?

OOCrystalforged just smiles and snaps his fingers.

Announcer: Will Chalky realize I am here and discover how good I taste with Terriaky sauce? (in a normal voice) ...Wait a sec, why'd I say that?

Chalky: What's that?

OOCrystalforged: An announcer, they're just like narrators except they're rarer. I hear they are also more tender too.

Chalky: Sweet.

Announcer: When will the bloody maiming of my body begin?

OOCrystalforged: I'm thinking about now.

Announcer: AHHHHHHH!!!!!



OOC: I'll appreciate anything you can give me Silver.
rampant

08-29-06, 07:33 PM		Sarah - I see The tiger, the kalashtar, and the mage, Their putting up some sort of arena, either the space will be limited or they intend to use extradimensional space.

Elina - Where's the Half-drow?

Kratwe - Behind you.

----------------------------

Kratwe - I don't wann see hide nor hair of the two of you, until we call.

Drops them back on the ship.
leaves.

Elina - So?

Sarah - They got fountain like a mushroom with water welling up out of the top the top part spins but the rest of the hood is still.

Elina - I think we have enough, we can't avoid them forever and I don't wanna risk it for a second shot that might not tell us half this much.

Sarah - Agreed, I didn't even smell her sneaking up on us.

Elina - Yes, remember they are really good. They went to the same school as aunt Satnak.

Sarah - You sure about this, it sounds like a lot of work, if we get in. I mean if we wanna be strong we just need to wait for the seals to fade.

Elina - Precisely why I want to do this, If we do it that way we let fate and chance determine our future. I want to go to the academy so I can push myself to the limit and then past it so I know what I'm truly capable of. Not just whatever fate wants to do with me.

Sarah - Yeah that makes sense. Fate is bad, its always messing with Mom and Momma so they have to keep smaking it down. I don't want anything to do with it.

Elina - Then lets pass this test and see what we can do.

Sarah - Deal.
Charles Phipps

08-29-06, 09:28 PM		OOC: Odd fact, it's not actually Gaia whom appeared to Rose but that revelation shall be saved for later.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-29-06, 09:28 PM		Elina - Precisely why I want to do this, If we do it that way we let fate and chance determine our future. I want to go to the academy so I can push myself to the limit and then past it so I know what I'm truly capable of. Not just whatever fate wants to do with me.

Sarah - Yeah that makes sense. Fate is bad, its always messing with Mom and Momma so they have to keep smaking it down. I don't want anything to do with it.
A flash of magical light appears on each of their heads, barely peeking out from under their hair. The seal glows for a moment and the end point flares up. Much like a fuse, the flare follows the seal from start to finish, tracing the pattern in the opposite direction it was woven. As it reaches the end, it simply flickers out. (The Crown seal (knowledge/understanding/awareness) is now unbound)

Sarah: Whoa! Wasn't that...?

Elina: A seal? But...why now?

Sarah: Mom said they'd break as we matured. Maybe...she meant more than just physically?

Elina: When we decided to take the harder path...it opened up!

Sarah: That's what Mom was talking about!

Elina: That means that we'll only come into our own power when we're prepared for it.

Sarah: Which means we'll never get it if we don't work to earn it.

Elina: No shortcuts to power. Our mommies wanted to make sure we wouldn't be overwhelmed.

Sarah: Let's show our thanks by passing.
Charles Phipps

08-29-06, 09:55 PM		Vampire Hunter Rose: And knowing kids, is half the battle.

Elin: Uncle Rose, why are you covered in blood?

Vampire Hunter Rose: Oh, that's because I found some evil and am staking it through the heart over there.

Doog: GAHHhhhh! MEDIC!

Sarah: :blink:

Elin: Is Mister Doog actually a vampire?

Vampire Hunter Rose: You mean stakes through the heart aren't an all-purpose cure for evil?

Sarah: ....No.

Vampire Hunter Rose: :censored:

Elin: Eeesh.

Vampire Hunter Rose: In any case, kids, remember that You are the One Girl in the World Chosen to fight the Vampires, the Demons, and the Forces of Darkness. The Slayer.

Sarah: Which one of us are you talking to?

Vampire Hunter Rose: Both.

Elin: But...

Vampire Hunter Rose: Don't bother me with technicalities. One of you can be the cute young witch helper...and probably gay unless you get with the nerdy kid. The other can be the Vampire Huntress whom has a doomed relationship with multiple vampires that break the 'All Vampires are evil Rule.'

Sarah: Mister Rose, when did you go crazy?

Vampire Hunter Rose: Long before you girls arrived. Now, I have to go find the Third Terra/Lisa girl to form the Charmed Ones. Then I have to go have sex with Tatyana over in Ravenloft.

Zella: WAHHHHHHHHHHH
Kaizer_Ryu

08-29-06, 10:12 PM		Rose's right hand balls up and punches him in the face.

Elina: :uh-huh:

Rose: OW! What was that for!

Hand: You talk to much. You're supposed to be brooding and angsty.

Rose: Shut your noise, you!

Sarah: :confused: :twitch: Did your hand just...talk?

Rose: Oh, this is the carbuncle that lives in my hand. He came with the headband.

Elina: Uh...huh.

Rose: :D Not to mention this REALLY AWESOME SWORD!

*pulls out a shiny, silver sword*

Girls: :mad: Grrrrrrrrrr!!!!!

Rose: *anime sweatdrop* Oh, silver, right.
Charles Phipps

08-29-06, 10:15 PM		OOC: Oh the possibilities for mocking Vampire Hunter Rose are tremendous at this point on.

Van Von Hunter: We have to have some words here buddy....
urial angel of death

08-29-06, 10:15 PM		Gregory: I feel unwanted. :weep:

OOC: It's hard to think of things to do with a good character.
Charles Phipps

08-29-06, 10:18 PM		OOC: I'm sorry Urial. Let me rectify that!

Vampire Hunter Rose: Hello Gregory!

Gregory: Ummm...hello stranger.

Vampire Hunter Rose: IT IS YOUR DESTINY TO JOIN ME IN A QUEST TO STOP THE FORCES OF DARKNESS!

Gregory: What...really?

Vampire Hunter rose: Well, probably. I mean, if you do it then the prophecy is right and if not...well you'll only be dead.

Gregory: What forces of darkness?

Vampire Hunter Rose: They're all about the ship. I swear, the BEADY LITTLE EYED CREATURES ALWAYS STEALING AND ASKING STUPID QUESTIONS! THERE'S ONE NOW!

Tasslehoff Burrfoot: Oh crap, he's spotted us! Run!

Kender: Hiya!

*pulls out his silver sword*

Vampire Hunter Rose: CHARGE!
urial angel of death

08-29-06, 10:40 PM		Gregory: No harming innocents!

Gregory pulls out a pair of masterwork manacles. He then attatches one end to Rose's arm and the other to a door handle in one practiced motion. This causes Rose to stop abruptly and fall to the floor.

Gregory: I am sorry, but I must up hold the paladin's code.
cypher_zero

08-29-06, 10:42 PM		Terrek: (Runs out on SOS) Kender! Kill it!!! Kill it now!!!

Kender: Ahhhhh!!! Run!
.
Charles Phipps

08-29-06, 10:56 PM		Vampire Hunter Rose: Ummmm...hey will someone vampirize the Kender so they can be killed?

Gregory: That's not how the paladin's code works!

Vampire Hunter Rose: By the Traveller man! Do you know what happens if one of those kender gets wet? It'll multiply! Then god knows if you feed them after midnight then ALL HELL WILL BREAK LOOSE!

Gregory: I believe that's Gremlins.

Tasslehoff Burrfoot: *lifts Wand of Wonder* You must have dropped this.

*chaos magic starts to fill the ship*
cypher_zero

08-30-06, 12:19 AM		Terrek casts a spell at the Kender, who is frozen for a moment as he turns deathly pale and grows fangs.

Terrek: Have at it.
Sir Elton

08-30-06, 12:58 AM		SOS walks up to the Kender, and kicks it off the Forgotten Freedom. "Now, what did you say what was the problem?"
----------------------------------------------------------

No one noticed that the Kender landed on the Karrnathi Death Knight's nightmare. Tasslehoff burrfoot looked up and noticed the Karrnathi Death Knight. "Err, is that you Lord Soth?"

The Karrnathi Death Knight laughed, "No, I'm not Lord Soth. And you are supposed to be dead."

"Oh, I have this device of time journeying . . . "

"Zaphod," said the Karrnathi Death Knight. "Show this Kender a good time."

Tasslehoff Burrfoot had just a little time before this weird human showed up with long blond hair and an orange juicer helmet on his head. "Hello little Kender, I'm from a different planet!"

Then the Karrnathi Death Knight asked, "Are you sure this drink . . ."

"Khoravarian Pan-Continental Gargle Blaster!" said Zaphod.

". . . yes. Will work to get all the Red Shirts drunk?"

"If not, it will blast their brains with a sensation not unlike having a gold brick wrapped in an orange peal slamming on their brains. The feeling is YOWSER!!"

"Right. Deliver the beverage!"

The next moment, magic catapults began catapulting cases of Khoravarian Pan-Continental Gargle Blasters right on deck of the Forgotten Freedom. Amazingly enough, some of the bottles actually survived and the Red Shirts began to guzzle the stuff. So, Vampire Hunter Rose did look down to see a Karrnathi Death Knight ordering the stuff to be catapulted on to his ship.

"OOOH! An agent of Evil, and a Karrnathi Death Knight too! Don't worry, Zella my love, I'll dispatch of him . . . wait, that wasn't angsty enough. You know what, I have my own problems Zella. I'm going to take care of said Vampire Hunter Rose before Lisa's Temperance Band begins to play."
rampant

08-30-06, 01:05 AM		*chaos magic starts to fill the ship*

and no one notices a thing
-----------------------------------

Sivic - Allright you two up and git, yer parents so we can do this

Elina and Sarah - Finally :evillaugh

Sivic - I hate it when they do that.
----------------------------------

The arena is a circle about a quarter mile across, the outer ring is a moat with giant lilypads on it, in the center is a fountain in the shape of a giant mushroom with a hole in the top from which water wells and slips down the sides the top spins and in the middle above the hole is a floating steel bar.
Two blue spaces mark opposite each other and one red space on the perimeter between them complete the scene.

Ken'baroque - Bring the bar to the red space, you must be dry. Each of you starts from one of the blue spaces. Ready?....

Elina and Sarah take starting positions.

Kratwe - Go
----------------------------
In the stands

Terra - Wait a minute only one is gonna get in if there is only one bar.

Lisa - :D

Terra - What do you know that I don't?

Lisa - Its a puzzle as much as a physical challenge.

Terra - :plotting: :lightbulb

Lisa - They'll figure it out.
---------------------------------

OOC: Kaizer your up, unless you want me to do it, remember they knew they had water and climbing to deal with. Also no items over 500gp.
Gladius_Lucix

08-30-06, 01:08 AM		OOC: I guess it's too late for me to lend them a Weirsan Shield. Darn.

----

Liam looks at the kender as it goes flying off the ship.

Liam: Good riddance. They got into my lab and wrecked the place.

*poof*

OOGladius: Technically, that was your cousin.

Liam: :confused: What are you talking about?

OOGladius: If it wasn't for them, your entire race would be a sedentary lump, living under hills with little round doors. Then again, it's probably better than one of the other options.

Liam: And what would that be?

OOGladius: Athas. Freaky little things, them.

OOGladius shudders, then pauses to consider.

OOGladius: I think your Talentan brothers actually do have some Athasian halfling.

Liam walks away, sighing and shaking his head.

---

OOC: For those who don't know, or don't feel like thinking, Athas = Dark Sun = Cannibalistic Desert-dwelling Halfings.
rampant

08-30-06, 02:29 AM		Tirmek - I hope they do well, I do so desire some competition from someone in my age bracket.

Lisa - A little arrogant don't you think?

Tirmek - Sorry, but I've pretty much beaten all my other peers on the island so I'm hoping some of the students coming in from other areas might offer up a decent rival or two. Its difficult to get the students even one bracket up on you to take us seriously at this point.

Ketty - So you two are the ones who have managed to impress my sister so much.

Terra - Where is she? and whats this about her and Serene being married?

Ketty - As to locale she and Serene just came in through the side entrance. as to the marriage, well almost a decade ago, about a month your time. Damn all time distortions.

Lisa - Preaching to the choir.

Ketty - I'm sure you heard about the Sirinon.

Terra - If you mean angry ranting and holes punched in walls then yes.

Ketty - :rolleyes: yes that, well when the final challange was made the rules stated that the winner of the fight would be wedded to Satnak d'Borisheel. Now on our end thats all it takes is such a declaration made under the proper circumstances. The ceremony really is less than a formality as far as legal is concerned. Our own parents decided on a rather short and simple set up, at least from what i can dig up.

Tirmek - Ooh its starting.

Ketty - Before you ask, he is that good, and that desperate for rivals.
urial angel of death

08-30-06, 07:22 AM		Nalfien wander onto the deck and picks up a Khoravarian Pan-Continental Gargle Blaster.

Nalfien: :lightbulb

Nalfien drops a small glowing bead into it and throws it over the ship. Four rounds later an explosion of biblical proportions rocks the ship from below. Then more and more explosions go off as a chain reaction starts between the Khoravarian Pan-Continental Gargle Blaster still on the ground.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-30-06, 08:58 AM		OOC: I guess you can do it, rampant. I'm in another time crunch (Damn real life! Damn it to hell! :P ) and probably won't be back till late tonight. This looks like something I couldn't just throw together in a few minutes, which is really all I have time for. :(
Gladius_Lucix

08-30-06, 09:02 AM		Liam heads down to watch the test. Hearing the description, he tries to find one of the procters to ask a few questions. Seeing one of the people that came through, but not remember their name, Liam walks over.

Liam: Excuse me, but I was wondering. How dry do they have to be? And, if they do get wet, there was no given time limit, I think, so couldn't they just stand around until they were both dry?
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-30-06, 09:03 AM		OOcat: :zzz:

*WHAM!*

OOcat: :zzz:

Bunny: Darn you, wake up! *Super-powered Super Slam*

OOcat: :zzz:

Silver: Do something fun already, we're dying out here!

OOcat: :zzz: (mumbled: ) Gender bender………

Silver: :rolleye2: Finally.
******
Lucky appears on the deck of the FF wearing tights and underwear over them. All his/her clothes are decorated with intertwined male/female symbols, and the Belt of Feminity/Masculinity is prominantly displayed.

Rose: Are you EVIL?

Hand: Oh, a fruit.

Rose: Lucky is a respected employee of Erk's Place.

Hand: Oh, a fruit-drink then.

Lucky: I am……THE GENDER BENDER! I seek out those who feel they are trapped in the wrong gender and fix them!

Silver: Maybe getting the E.B.N.E. going wasn't such a good idea.

Michael appears on deck.

Lucky: Behold! (points to Michael)

Michael turns into a woman.

Lucky: My work here is done. (tries to do a flashy exit, but simply ends up falling down the stairs)
Sir Elton

08-30-06, 09:25 AM		Nalfien wander onto the deck and picks up a Khoravarian Pan-Continental Gargle Blaster.

Nalfien: :lightbulb

Nalfien drops a small glowing bead into it and throws it over the ship. Four rounds later an explosion of biblical proportions rocks the ship from below. Then more and more explosions go off as a chain reaction starts between the Khoravarian Pan-Continental Gargle Blaster still on the ground.

The smoking ground below shows up a smoking Karrnath Death Knight. He's staring blankly as if he was caught completely off guard. "What happened? I thought that plan was foolproof. ZAPHOD! I thought your made up drink from Stormholme was the most popular drink in all the world!"

Zaphod said, "Sorry, baby . . . ."

The Karrnathi Death Knight gritted his teeth. "I'll get you yet for impuning on my King's honor like that!"
Gladius_Lucix

08-30-06, 11:29 AM		Liam finds another Khorvarian Pan-Continental Gargle Blaster hidden about the ship. Pulling out a flask of Liquid Keelhaul, he mixes the two and goes off to find someone sober and sorry about it, preferably Rose.
RPGfan

08-30-06, 06:31 PM		Meanwhile, in Argonnessen...

Two Red Dragon's in a dark cavern gaze into a giant crystal ball.

Red Young Adult Dragon: "Now do you doubt my divinations master? The crew of the Forgotten Freedom is definately under the influence of the one who attacked you (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=688766)."

Red Great Wyrm Dragon: "I suppose you're right Tyrass, but I don't understand how this concern's my plan's."

Tyrass: "If Frances d'Lyrander's ghost really is on that ship, then we must destroy it to prevent them from doing what Frances did."

Red Wyrm: "Bah. It is of no concern to me if Frances resides in the Elemental Ring as you predict. He cannot awaken. He- What was that?"

Tyrass: "What was what?"

Red Wyrm: "That. On the Ring. I think I saw a ghostly hand reach out."

Tyrass: "Great Tiamat! The ghost crew has awakened!"

Red Wyrm: "Spread the rumor that the Seren Barbarian's have been hiding Frances's stolen swag! We must lure them to us so that we may finish what happened all those years ago!"

Feel free to implement this arc whenever. I can't tell if you're already in the middle of one or not.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-30-06, 07:35 PM		13: Earl?

Earl, ship's ring elemental: Yes?

13: You sharing the ring with anyone?

Earl: Not that I know of.

13: Okay………now…I away! (leaps over the side with cape billowing out behind him.
RPGfan

08-30-06, 07:50 PM		Frances d'Lyrander's ghost: "Why didn't ya tell 'em abou' me?"

Earl: "Who's there?"

Frances d'Lyrander's ghost: "Ah. Tha's why. Well, I'll be in tha hold lookin' fer rum."
rampant

08-30-06, 09:20 PM		Elina - (i.h.h. lets do this)

Sarah - (i.h.h. gonna make'em proud)

------------------------

Sivic - Listen I can let you into the stands, but at this point we only act to prevent outside interference, or if the kids manage to break a rule. I'm not allowed to talk to you about the test till its over. And before you ask yes Satnak has asked for the blueprints to be forwarded to Forbes and the plant managers.

Liam - oh
---------------------------

Sarah and Elina dash towards the fountain, springing across the giant lily pads as they cross the water. They hit the fountain from opposite sides and find that under the cascading water their are good handholds.

As they approach the top of the cap the surface quickly beccomes too smooth.

Elina - Sarah its small enough now i think.

Sarah and Elina use their last good foot grips to stand and grab each other by the arms. They continue up using each other to pull themselves to the surface of the cap.
---------------------------

Tirmek - Well thats the first trap passed, I geuss the proctors were relying on sibling rivalry to take over.
rampant

08-30-06, 10:23 PM		The duo reach the top.

Elina - OK on three we both grab the bar and push off from your left.

Sarah - 1...2...THREE!

The Sisters push up and off each grabing one end of the bar on the way down.

SPWASH
-----------------------

Tirmek - And they seem to have something in mind for trap number 2. (crooked smile displays one fang)

-------------------

Elina and Sarah surface and swim to shore. As reach land they approach the red zone and halt.

Elina - Ok now we just wait here.

Sarah - Should I break it in half or we just jump in the red, holding it together.

Elina - Lets not break it just yet. I say we just relax till we dry off, then use your second idea.

Sarah - kay
---------------------

Tirmek - Nice, Oh these two, these two are something.

Terra - Its wierd because he's just a year younger than they are.

Lisa - I know, but he's Satnak's biological nephew. Sometimes it runs in the family.

Ketty - He can be a little unnerving, but I remember being the same way. Kids are supposed to be hyper competitive.
------------------------

A while later.

Sarah - I'm bored. This game isn't as much fun whithout the waffle irons.

Elina - Yeah well we're dry now so lets end it.

Sarah - Finally.

The two grip the ends of the bar and hop into the red zone.
-----------------

Satnak - WHOOOOHOOOOOOOOOO

Serene - YAAAY

Tirmek - (looks up from book)
Kaizer_Ryu

08-30-06, 10:30 PM		OOC: Nice, rampant. Way better than what I would have done. Read the following to see why.

IC:

Terra: Well, that's a load off my mind.

Lisa: No kidding. It's good to see they were paying attention.

Terra: By the way, where's Dragon boy? Shouldn't he be here?

Lisa: Oh, yeah, He's right over there. Though I'm not sure if he saw any of it.

OOKaizer: *leaning on the wall* :crazy: Make the world stop, mommy... *hgurk* Ugh...damn vertigo... :yuck:

OOC: Yeah, my world sucks at the moment. :P
RPGfan

08-30-06, 10:50 PM		Better than a legendary pirate's ghost trying to pick up a rum bottle without realizing that he can't because he's dead. Without even knowing he's dead.
rampant

08-30-06, 11:04 PM		Satnak rushes the field and grabs the girls up in a big hug (don't worry she's careful not to squish them)

Satnak - Haha you did it. Tonight I'm taking you to a skife race.

Terra - :ahem:

Satnak - Assuming thats alright with your parents of course.:embarrass Heh...

Lisa - :D Only if you bring us along.

Serene - i'm coming too.

Tirmek - I'm racing.

Satnak - You come here. *tail hug*

Tolos - Yes celebration is in order.

Ken'baroque - where did Sivic and Kratwe run off to?
---------------------

Sivic and Kratwe - :drool:

Nazroth - (anime sweat drop)
cypher_zero

08-30-06, 11:09 PM		Terrek leans against a wall cooly watching Nazroth sweat.

Terrek: And this is why I don't flaunt my craftsmanship abilities...
.
Crystalforged

08-31-06, 01:04 AM		In Kanatash and Caralot's shared room after a very long and very exhausting session of "reaquainting."

Kanatash: Honey, I was thinking...

Caralot: More ideas? I'm impressed, I think even Silver is starting to run out of ideas.

Kanatash: No, no I was thinking of something else for once. I was just thinking that now that you're finally back from your long sabaticle maybe its time we finally went through with it and, you know, tie the knot.

Caralot: (purring seductively) "Tie the knot" now that sounds kinky.

Kanatash: :rolleyes: You know what I mean.

Caralot: :P Of course I do, I was just teasing. I do agree with you though, it is time to formalize it.

Kanatash: Yes. I'm not quite sure how to begin however.

Caralot: Well the ceremony needs to be planned of course and we'll need to invite family and friends who don't live on the ship.

Kanatash: Of course. (sigh) I suppose that means I'll have to invite my parents...

Caralot: Are your parents that bad?

Kanatash: You have no idea. It is something that cannot be described, only experienced.

Caralot: Oh my poor baby. :angelhide I know what will cheer you up, why don't we try "tying the knot?"

Kanatash: :smirk: I like the way you think.
cypher_zero

08-31-06, 01:10 AM		Terrek rubs his eyes, trying to get the mental images out of his head

Terrek: (I.H.H.) I need to stop scrying on people so much... It's bad for my sanity.
.
rampant

08-31-06, 01:40 AM		OOC: You know I was really expecting some response on the whole married bit, Terrek at least.
---------------------------
While everyone is getting ready for heading to the island or just otherwise occupied.

Serene - Satnak...

Satnak - I don't like that tone, whats wrong? is it about the marriage thing? I mean you seemed ok with it, but you don't have to act on it if you don't want to.

Serene - I'm confused is more like it, and a little annoyed your not outraged about it.

Satnak - Well I'm sorry, but I grew up thinking of marriage as a more political thing. On the Island by the time a couple hitched they usually had been living together a few years already, so it was more a giant anniversary with rings. I guess I just don't place as much importance on the ceremony as the connection it celebrates.

Serene - I see your point, but...

Satnak - Not helping?

Serene - No its not.

Satnak - Listen I've got two nieces and a nephew who need to have some fun tonight. Lets just go to the party and have some fun then figure out what to do about this.
cypher_zero

08-31-06, 07:50 AM		OOC: Been busy. There'll be a response, I'm just waiting to see where you take it. I can be very patient...
.
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-31-06, 08:40 AM		OOcat: :zzz:

Silver: :ahem: Well, is it awake yet?

Bunny: It's dealing with some sleep problems. Nothing we can do about it.

Silver: You ever get the feeling that creating a body to write us in was a waste of time?

Bunny: Constantly.

Silver: …………………Well, I'm tapped out.

OOcat: :zzz:

Bunny: Just go and make sure Erk's Place will be back in time for catering duty. That's one fun idea that didn't go anywhere.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-31-06, 09:19 AM		OOC: OK, I've gone from tilt-a-whirl to skating after a ride on the roller coaster.

Yes, that's an improvement. I can type now.

IC:

*BIG FAMILY HUG*

Lisa: I'm so proud of you two!

Elina & Sarah: :D

Terra: You passed with flying colors! And you broke a seal! Big day.

Sarah: We were a bit surprised ourselves.

Elina: I think we figured out what you meant by maturing, too.

Lisa: Once I saw there was only one bar, I was a bit concerned, but you both showed me there was nothing to worry about.

Terra: And you noticed there was no time limit. You surpassed even my expectations with the patience you showed.

Elina & Sarah: :D :embarrass Eh heh...

Terra & Lisa: *no longer able to restrain themselves* :D :cloud9: YOU ARE SO CUTE! :cloud9: :D

*GIGANTIC FAMILY HUG*
urial angel of death

08-31-06, 01:05 PM		Gregory: I feel unwanted and under used.

Klaz: Well come to the group.

Gregory: What?

Klaz: We lesser used crew members are those who have lazy on absent creators and no one wants to else wants to use us.

Gregory: What do you do all day then?

Klaz: Mostly strip poker.

Gregory: :weep:
Sir Elton

08-31-06, 03:36 PM		SOS was wandering through Olian's forest until he found Lisa and Sarah hugging each other. He scratches his head trying to make sense of it.

"Duh, why are you holding each other like that?" asked SOS.

Lisa turned to SOS and said, "Because we love each other."

"Two girls loving each other, is that what you say?"

"Yes," answered Sarah. "We just can't get enough of each other's feelings for each other."

SOS started scratching his own head, again. "Scratching your head, SOS?" asked a familiar voice. SOS turned around and saw Halharath. His robe was open again, revealing his sculpted body muscles.

"Halharath? What are you doing aboard the Forgotten Freedom?"

"What is the Lord of Blades doing on the Forgotten Freedom?"

Lisa looked at Halharath's body, and suddenly some old feelings started appearing. "I . . . I . . . . "

Sara looked at Hal, then she looked at Lisa, then she looked at Hal, and then she looked at Lisa again. "My, what a pretty body you have," said Sarah to Halharath.

Halharath turned to Sarah and just stared hard. Then he said, "I thank you for the compliment Sarah, but Lisa is apparently admiring my naked chest while trying to justify her admiration of you. What did you do to the Paladin, Sarah? Selfishly twisted her emotions so you can have her all to herself?"

Sarah's brow furrowed. "What kind of a person are you? Someone who thinks he has license to enter someone's head and find out what he or she is thinking?"

"Actually, I mindlinked with Lisa, Sarah," said Halharath. "She's very, very, confused. Now if you excuse me, I need to go interrogate the Lord of Blades' personality that lives on your ship so I can find out where my 'brothers' are."

"Wait, right there, pretty boy!" Sarah said as a mindblade lept into her hands. It was a pink mindblade. Halharath put up his hands. "I demand some satisfaction."

"Satisfaction for what?" Halharath said as he held up his hands. He looked smug and pleased, as if he had Sarah right where he wanted her.

"You think you have the unmitigated gumption to look inside my wife's mind and check her out?" said Sarah. "And you have the audacity to accuse me of stealing her heart when she willfully gave it to me?"

"I've never accused you of anything of the sort," said Halharath.

"Oh yes you did," said Sarah. "I could see it in your eyes. I want to settle this!"

"How?" asked Halharath.

"A duel. A duel of blades. A duel to first blood," said Sarah. "I draw first blood, you leave Lisa alone."

Halharath then said, "What if I draw first blood?"

"Then, I'm everything you accuse me of," said Sarah.

Halharath smiled. "Are you sure of this, Sarah? Are you sure you want to cross mindblades with a real soulknife?"

"Oh, I am quite sure," said Sarah.

Halharath looked at Lisa, and grinned. Here is your chance, Lisa, thought Halharath. Here is your real chance to redeem yourself. "Then I accept."
Kaizer_Ryu

08-31-06, 03:47 PM		OOC: Sarah is Lisa's daughter. Terra is her wife and neither of them are about to start looking at men. Also, Lisa does not need to redeem herself. Terra is not a Soulknife anymore, either. Not to mention that they'd probably just laught at him and walk away. That's just how much they trust each other.

IC:

OOKaizer: Hold your horses. She's busy at the moment.

Gregory: Who are you?

OOKaizer: I'm Lisa's Entity.

Gregory: :confused: The who in the what, now?

OOKaizer: Spend enough time here and you'll figure it out eventually. She'll get around to dealing with you once everything is set up with her daughters.

Gregory: Oh, that...right. Then I shall take this as part of my training. A good Paladin must have patience.

OOKaizer: I thought most Paladins had to have the "stick up their ass" feat, first.

Gregory: Oh, I've already got that. Now I want to learn how Miss Lisa balances what her class and Church ask of her with what her God and conscience demand of her.

OOKaizer: That one's easy. She's mental and we take a lot of liberties with the Paladin's code of ethics.

Gregory: That's it?

OOKaizer: It sounds simple, but actually requires a lot of work. A good, virtuous Paladin who is also insane is actually rather hard to do. Ask Kanatash what happened the first time she went mad.

Kanatash: :weep:
Sir Elton

08-31-06, 04:08 PM		Much later that day, in a glade, right beside Olian the two duelists took the field. Sarah had Lisa as her second. Halharath had no second except for a treant with a silly name: Fonkin Hoodypeaks. Halharath stripped off his outer robe, baring his chest to the full air. He had an ectothermic frame with sculpted muscles, a perfect beauty. Halharath then let down his long hair and it flowed down to his waist. It curled in places, but it was long and luxuriant.

Halharath did some mild concentration and a mindblade lept to his hands. It glowed green and was composed of hot, solid, ionized plasma. Sara also took the field. She stripped off her outer shirt to reveal her halter top and her tight pants. Soon, a mindblade lept to her hands as well. It was still pink in color, and glowed with fluresence.

Lisa said, "Sarah, are you sure about this, he's way over matched. Go easy on him."

Sarah said, "No, my honor is at stake. He accused me."

"But Sarah . . . " Lisa started to say.

"Enough. Watch the little ones," said Sarah. "I have a score to settle."

Sarah and Halharath took the field and marched towards each other. Soon, as they got closer, Halharath started to speak: "We can avoid this fight, Sarah."

"Why do you say that?" asked Sarah.

"How much do you love Lisa?" asked Halharath.

Sarah stopped and thought. "I love her more than my life is worth."

Halharath then said, "Then go ahead, help her find a way to free her from the Geas she is under."

"No!" said Sarah. "No, I can't do that!"

Halharath stopped, they were just ten feet away from each other. "Why?"

Sarah looked at Lisa, then looked at Halharath. "No, I can't do that. I can never do that, if she goes, my life will be empty."

"If you truly love her you will let her go," said Halharath. "And if she truly loves you, she will come back to you."

"I can't," said Sarah. "I just can't!" Sarah charged at Halharath. As she sprinted towards her enemy, Halharath jumped up, tumbled head over heals in the air over Sarah, straightened out and came down. Immediately, he whirled around in time to parry Sarah's mindblade right out of her hands with the slightest touch.

Sarah formed a new blade and brought it down to connect with his body, and he parried that. Again, her blade flew from her hands with the slightest touch.

"You really don't know how to use your mindblade, do you?"

Sarah was getting frustrated. She growled.
Charles Phipps

08-31-06, 04:09 PM		OOC: Hey, lisa can still look at the menu even if she's not ordering. Let's not forget Lisa swings her sword both ways!

;-)

Terra: Is sex all you men think about?

Duh.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-31-06, 04:14 PM		OOC: Um...yeah, no. Though it would be interesting if it was in character, it's just not them. Even if you replace Sarah with Terra. Even if she would do something like this (which she wouldn't), Terra is simply beyond him anyway. She wields the very essence of the Plane of Shadow as a virtual extension of her body, and doesn't even need to touch him to hurt him.

You can have her look all she wants, but they're not going to leave each other. Don't even go there.

There is no Geas. Lisa is in this relationship of her own free will. There is no manipulation, no underhandedness, nothing of the sort.
luna18moon

08-31-06, 04:28 PM		Slaypaw: Finally, Operation C.A.T. is complete! :D Let's celebrate by taking half the catnip out now.
Fluffy: :confused: Why not all of it?
Slaypaw: Because it would take forever to get another haul like this.
Fluffy: You know we're probably going to use all of it anyway.
Slaypaw: Yes, but we can at least project the image of restraint.
Fluffy: Touche.:)
A couple minutes later...
Both: :pint:
Charles Phipps

08-31-06, 04:30 PM		OOC: Chill Kaiser, Lisa only loved Michael aside from Terra and was too traumatized to care for anyone else. ;-) I don't think anyone thinks a paladin is going to break her vows thereof.

Rose: It's basically because he knows that happiness always results in TRAGIC AND NIGHTMARISH DEATH.

What?

Rose: I'm a Vampire Hunter as well as Captain? No sooner do I love a woman then she gets kidnapped.

That's because Zella is vampire bait.

Zella: I am not!

Rose: Whatever. One of the partners will die, get mind controlled (already done), or so on in order to create artificial tension. It's inevitable. Then Lisa will get possessed by a cosmic entity, sacrifice her life, then Terra will marry a Lisa clone only to divorce her when Lisa comes back.

That's the Dark Phoenix saga.

Rose: Still applicable.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-31-06, 04:36 PM		OOC: I wouldn't have nearly as much of an issue with this if it was played at least partially in character. As such, I think I'll do a bit here.

IC:

Terra: You are good with a mindblade, I give you that.

Halharath feels a sharp pain on his leg.

Terra: But this match is over.

Looking down, he sees that the shadows on the ground have risen up and pierced his leg. Blood drips down to his feet.
Sir Elton

08-31-06, 04:44 PM		OOC: Sarah is Lisa's daughter. Terra is her wife and neither of them are about to start looking at men. Also, Lisa does not need to redeem herself. Terra is not a Soulknife anymore, either. Not to mention that they'd probably just laught at him and walk away. That's just how much they trust each other.


OCC. I'll change it, slightly. But do me a favor: you can continue the swashbuckling duel of blades, but don't kill either of them off.

Not until what I have planned with this duel comes to pass. :)

Edit: I have a Rolemaster Adventure I have to finish. So, I'll bring a quick resolution to this.
------------------------------------------------------------

"Alright, you drew first blood," said Halharath. "Per the agreement, I leave you alone. But know this, I've been to Sora Teraza and she said I'll never be able to find my 'brothers' until I defeat the demon that's inside Lisa.

"Lisa's demon has manifested itself dozens of times, but this time, it may take physical form. Sora Teraza said there is a Fiend festering in your Wife's Heart, and it was our destiny to destroy it, together."

Halharath got some gauze and started wrapping his wound. He then looked up at Terra. "I hope you can deal with the fiend that is harbored in Lisa."
Kaizer_Ryu

08-31-06, 05:29 PM		Terra: If what you say is true, we will be fine. For you see, in many ways, I myself am a demon. That power I used is no mere trick. It decends from The Shadow himself. Though I am not of his blood, that evil still resides within me.

Halharath: You are not the one in danger.

Terra: How little you know. *looks at Lisa* You have not witnessed our past struggles. We are no strangers to possession. I would say the question is: Can the fiend deal with being within Lisa?

Halharath: You seem confident enough. Just do not let that blind you to danger.

Terra: Sora Teraza can see many things, but our future is not set. Fate no longer holds sway over us, and I will fight to my last breath to make sure it never will again. Should you see that hag again, any predictions she gives you about us will be nothing but lies, for even she will never know what lies in our future.
urial angel of death

08-31-06, 05:30 PM		Volrath: This man is so annoying! Terra may I eat him?

-------
Welcome to more Mysteries of the Universe. Brought to you by Jhon, :coolcthul , and Cool Evil replacing Hippy Kanatash.

Jhon: How is it that people on this ship achieve such high level, specifically those that don't do much high level monsters fighting like Terrek and Terra?

Cool Evil: Woh man we haven't even lit up the joints yet. That sounded way to sober!

The joints are lighted and everyone but Jhon get very high.

:coolcthul : Like how do people on this ship who don't fight lots of high level monster level up on this ship so often?

Jhon: That is what I just said!

Cool Evil: Shut up Jhon, :coolcthul is sayin' somethin' profound.

Jhon: Nevermind.

Cool Evil: Well lets look at what gives exp in 3.5. There is killing monsters within seven levels of you, and if the DM allows it good roleplaying.

Jhon: Does grand master DM Charles Phippes give exp for good roleplaying?

Voice from the Sky: Yes.

Cool Evil: Awesome! Damn you crew of the FF! You killed Count Evillo!

V.f.t.S.: I said good roleplaying.

:coolcthul : So that explains Terra, but how did Terrek get so high?

Jhon: It shall forever remain a mystery.

Cool Evil: So we ran out of things to say.

Jhon: Yep.

:coolcthul : Oh great DM why can we think of nothing else.

V.f.t.S.: Because the entity writing this is lazy.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-31-06, 05:49 PM		Volrath: This man is so annoying! Terra may I eat him?
Terra: No you can't. We're already having a hard enough time with all the Full Metal Alchemist posers for you to start copying Gluttony.

Volrath: Awwwwww...but Chalky gets to be Envy! And Andrea gets to be Lust!

Terra: No posing as a Homonculus. It's not cool, just desperate. Case in point. *points at Nalfein*

Nalfein: I am Wrath! Feel the awesome might of Alchemy!

*it fizzles out pathetically*

Volrath: Ok. I see your point.

Satnak: Now stop stealing my off world comics!
Endless_Helix

08-31-06, 05:56 PM		Silence: Devon, hold this.

Devon: OOooh! Is it your diary?

Silence: *Looks at Devon with a blank stare* No, it isn't.

Devon: Err.. Oh.

Silence: Now, hold that till I get, like, a bunch of totally awesome crewmembers.

---
Silence walks up to Klaz's door, and kicks it open.

Klaz: DO YOU BLOODY MIND?!

Silence: Oh, am I, like, interupting something?

Dino: So, I'll just head off then shall I?

Silence: Klaz, like, shower, get dressed and be at the Keel in ten minutes. You're needed.

Klaz: *grumbles about baths and heads off to the showers*

---

Silence walks up to Ajihazi's door, and knocks quietly.

Ajihazi, in a falsetto voice: Who i-iss it?

Silence: Is that Maisy?

Ajihazi, in the same falsetto voice: Oh, it's you, Silence; I've a man in here.

Robrand: HEEEEEELLLLLPPP! PLEASE! GET ME OUT OF HERE! PLEEASE!

Silence: Oi. Well... At least I, like, got two with one rock...
---

Shadow: So anyway, there are so few of the original campers are left, I mean, there aren't any hot guys left...

Piffany: I know... Err... Nemisis... The chains are a different color than yesterday...

Nemisis: Oh, don't mind me.

Piffany: Well... It's kind of hard not to. Were you always like... this?

Shadow: PIFFANY! Oh my gods, Nemisis, Piffany didn't mean that!

Nemisis: *cheerfully* Oh yes she did! But I don't really care, and to answer the question, yep. I was like this from day one. Actually, it's more of a question of turning the powers off than it is a question of using them.

Silence: While this is, like, a totally awesome heart to heart session, You three need to come with me. I've got all the important campers with me, and you're the last three to round up.

Nemisis looks behind Silence.

Nemisis: Turgut is important?

---
The motley crew is assembled at the Keel.

John, the Enlightened Dire Keel: Hey everybody! I haven't seen you all in ages! How're you all doing?

Silence: Alright Devon, go off and practice your guitar.

Devon: Bu... *notices the way that Nemisis is looking at him* Okay, off I go, hiho, hiho... *walks away, very, very, quickly*

Silence: The reason I've, like, called you all here today is, like, we're going to summon back our E.B.N.E. We've got a sacrifice all lined up *Ishmael Jr. is bound and gagged atop a largish stone slab, groaning through the rag tied around his face* and then I'll call out the incantation and like, kill the sacrifice-

Ishmael Jr.: MMMPH!

Silence: and-

The clouds open up and the motley crew is surrounded in a ray of light, around the opening, a choir of angels begins singing a song suspiciously like the one sung in the Battle of Pelenor fields in the LOTR movie, after a few seconds one grins mischieviously, and whips off his robes and begins wailing on a sweet guitar. The rest of the angels plug their ears and step off, mumbling to themselves about forming a union, while the lone angel screams out a totally sweet guitar solo. A huge cloud of smoke envelops the summoning circle, and those standing too close to it (read: Turgut) begin coughing. A low voice that shakes the earth begins to chant ancient words in a fairly hodge-podge way, the earth splits open and a dozen devils jump out with trombones and begin ripping out sweet jazzy sounds, the lone angel looses balance on his cloud and falls screaming into the abyss... Out of the smoke a voice cries:

The Voice: I AM ENDLESS HELIX, THE DRAMATIC STUPID! I HAVE COME IN THE NICK OF TIME TO SAVE THE DAY! HAVE NO FEAR, JUSTICE IS HERE!

Silence: Oi. You're supposed to show up after the ritual is completed...

The Voice: Oh. Well. I'm back now.
---

Nemisis: That... was pretty stupid...
RPGfan

08-31-06, 06:07 PM		Meanwhile, in the rum storage room.

Frances's ghost seems to have figured out how to pick stuff up and is using his newfound talent to drink every ounce of rum onboard.

Frances: "I wonda' 'ow long it'll take 'em ta find out why tha rum's gone. Oh well."

He then chugs down an entire barrel full of Liquid Keelhauling.
Charles Phipps

08-31-06, 06:37 PM		Vampire Hunter Rose: *sighs in contentment* At last, the remaining vampires on the ship are ALLLllll dead.

Andrea: Except Devon.

Vampire Hunter Rose: Devons, a vampire?

Andrea: DUH.

Vampire Hunter Rose: I don't believe it.

Andrea: uhhh, he's got poofy hair. The silk shirt, and long claws...

Vampire Hunter Rose: I just thought he was in an 80s rock group.

Andrea: In any case, my work here is done.

Vampire Hunter Rose: What work?

Andrea: Well, I'll admit something, I've been lying to you guys the whole time. I'm a Karrnath noblewoman but not the late Duchess D'Glycine. I'm actually Princess Moranna of Karrnath.

Vampire Hunter Rose: ...really?

Andrea: Yes, it would be pretty obvious since there's a big picture of me on every street corner in Karrnath.

Vampire Hunter Rose: I just thought you looked like her.

Gregor: Hmmm...I detect EVIL.

Andrea: Gee, I wonder where.

Gregor: Quite a few places but mostly concentrated where your standing.

Andrea: Obviously the spot I'm on is evil.

Gregor: Well no doubt. You as a woman cannot possibly be evil.

*Andrea stares at him bizarrely*

Gregor: Yes, only undead women can be evil. It's a natural law. Kalashatar cannot be evil, Druids, women, angels, or children.

*Rose holds up a mirror beside Andrea where she casts no reflection, Gregor doesn't notice it*

Andrea: Well good luck Rose. Oh yes, and I'm kidnapping Zella on the way out. You can come and rescue her like our usual game.

Zella: Wait...GAME!?

Vampire Hunter Rose: Uhhh ignore that.

Michelle: You know, I'm still a woman.

Vampire Hunter Rose: We'll get you cured eventually. NOW GO BACK TO SERVING LIQUOR IN THE BAR!
SilvercatMoonpaw

08-31-06, 06:59 PM		Michelle: You know, I'm still a woman.
Silver: At least Doog isn't after you at the moment.

Michelle: Doog was after me?
*******
OOcat: So who is this "Sarah" person that Lisa is married to all of a sudden? Not like Terra at all.

13: The interference of Samurai Jack's "not talking much, really cool visuals" style into the FF's natural wackyness weaving into a inexperience curve and causing the merging of alternative timelines through the "why can't it be both" principle.

OOcat: So typo?

13: Pretty much.
urial angel of death

08-31-06, 07:05 PM		Kanatash: When will that Diablo 2 spoof happen and when will you get the ball rolling on the Gregory story.

OOUrial: Everyone else is doing something. I don't want to interrupt them now that I know they have a storyline going.

Kanatash: There were plenty of times before this that you could have started one of them.

OOUrial: Fine I'm just slow to post.

Kanatash: That and you just plain suck.

OOUrial: :weep:
rampant

08-31-06, 07:06 PM		As Halharath leaves the vicinity of Terra and lisa.

Satnak - Listen up you son of a hamster and an elderberry addict. You will tell me everything you know about this demon in my friend, and then you will walk away holding the five bleeding holes in your back.

Halharath - what five ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Satnak - Those...are for messing with my friends.

Tirmek - Do not aggravate her further, If shes anything like her sister...well I'd advise you co-operate.

Ketty - Indeed.
----------------------------------------

Serene - Satnak said she needed to do something with Ketty and Tirmek real quick.

Lisa - She probably just needed time to talk to her sister without the mask Ketty wears infront of everyone else.

Terra - HMMmmm.

Sarah - I wanna see the Race. Hurry up.

Elina - Calm down Tirmek said he was in the race, and he doesn't strike me as the type to let anything jepordize his attendance, and chances to win.
rampant

08-31-06, 07:15 PM		250. No posing as homunculus.

251. Or Full-metal type alchemists.

252. Transmutation is a school of magic.

253. The fact that this captain can't count any better than the previous one is for an entirely different reason.

254. He's not a drunk.

255. Yet

256. We're working on it okay.

257. Its because he's a spoony bard.

258. HEY!!!

259. Quiet you.:P

Rose - Did the list just ... Ok maybe I should find liam and that supernova in a bottle.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-31-06, 07:19 PM		OOcat: So who is this "Sarah" person that Lisa is married to all of a sudden? Not like Terra at all.
OOKaizer: THANK YOU! :bow:

OOcat: :zzz:

Bunny: *groan* Not again...

OOKaizer: Well, at least the unbelieveable Completely Out of Character Red Flag alert has been vindicated...

OOC: I'm not trying to be mean, it just had to be said. I might have been a little overzealous in my "rush to defend my characters personality integrity" episode. I admit I went a little overboard. I'm just glad it wasn't for something just in my head.
urial angel of death

08-31-06, 07:28 PM		OOUrial: You don't understand. It really was Sarah. That whole little storyline was a Daydream uncanonic event.

OOKaizer: What's a Daydream?

OOUrial: Oh it's when one of the characters in an comic broadcasts his perverse daydreams to the viewers. In this case it was Rose having some strange incest fantasy between Sarah and Lisa. He hadn't gotten to the juicy bits yet. He likes his fantasy with lots of story.

OOKaizer: Wow that's strange. Then why is Halharath there?

OOUrial: Because just like all talented (relatively speaking) bards deep down Rose is gay.

OOKaizer: So Devon isn't gay because he has no talent what so ever?

OOUrial: Exactly.
Charles Phipps

08-31-06, 07:31 PM		OORose: Obviously, your accusations are because Kaiser Ryu is inflicted with the DREAD CURSE OF VAMPIRISM!

OOCharles: You don't have an OO! You're a character!

OORose: Unlike Captain jarlot, I can break the 4th wall.

Tellah: You're still a spoony bard!

OORose: *cries*

OOCharles: Oiye. In any case, I'm intrigued by the Rose is gay subplots.

OORose: Right, so am I. I'll brush up by watching such gay-friendly movies as The Vampire Lovers and Lust for a Vampire. Then a long night of Lisa and Terra's honeymoon videos!

OOCharles: Uhhh....I don't think those qualify.

*Rose's cellphone rings*

Zella: Oh Rose! I've been kidnapped by an evil wizard. Come save me!

Rose: Damnit!

Doctor Phil, Dwarven Marriage therapist: Next time on my show. Couples whom have to have rescues in order to work. First up Sleeping Beauty and Prince Charming...
Kaizer_Ryu

08-31-06, 07:36 PM		OORose: Obviously, its because Kaiser Ryu is inflicted with the DREAD CURSE OF VAMPIRISM!
OOKaizer: I AM?!?!?!!? :dancin: WOO HOO!!!!!!!!!! :dancin:

OOUrial: You're nowhere near awesome enough to be a Vampire.

OOKaizer: But it makes sense! I hate the Sun, I can drain levels with a touch attack, and I drink blood!

OOUrial: You're a nerd, you merely sap the energy out of the room, and no you don't.

OOKaizer: :weep: Noooooooooooo.......... :weep:
cypher_zero

08-31-06, 07:50 PM		OOcypher: Not all may be as awesome as me. Oh, crap! I just broke the fourth wall. *mumble* Fragile piece of crap...

OOC: As far as defending your character's personality integrity goes, it didn't seem to me that you came across harsh; course, I'm a fairly blunt person and may have myself when defending my own character (Terrek) in the past.

Oh yea. Since I never formally re-introduced myself... I am cypher_zero. Commonly refered to as cypher. My characters are: Terrek, Serene (technicially - she's usually controlled by rampant), and Jhonall (only been used once. I think I'll bring him back.). All have fairly updated Wiki's ==PLEASE READ BEFORE USING!==

That is all.
.
RPGfan

08-31-06, 07:53 PM		And the rum storage is haunted. And noone cares. And only one person ever responded to my whole "ghost crew in the ring" thing. And I can't force my arc into action because there are no characters at a tavern currently. I hate my life.
Charles Phipps

08-31-06, 07:57 PM		Rose: Much like Gregor, the problem is that there's always going to be someone ignored for one's plotlines. Don't take it personally.

OORPGfan: I'm being comforted by a fictional character?

Rose: Fraid so.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-31-06, 07:58 PM		Terra: Hey, Lisa. Where are our honeymoon videos?

Lisa: They should still be in our room. Why?

Terra: They're not there. All I found was this blue medallion that is obviously a ripoff from Vampire Hunte-

Lisa: Uh-oh.

Terra: Yeah. I'll be right back.

-------

Terra bursts into Rose's room.

Terra: :mad: Alright, you pervert. Where are they?

Rose: Do you mind? I'm kind of in the middle of something.

The ghost of an elven woman floats in front of Rose. She looks rather surprised to see Terra.

Terra: ...Mom?

Rose: How'd you know she was my-

Terra: :blink: ...

Rose: :blink: ...

Terra & Rose: :eek: :OMG!

Laurel: Well, this is unexpected... Hello again, daughter.

Rose: So, she's your-

Terra: Which makes you my-

Both: :eek: EEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!! Ew, ew, ew, ew, ewewewewewewewew!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Rose: *tosses the videos to Terra* Get it away! Get it away! :yuck:

Terra: *catches them* My brother was gonna get off on my honeymoon videos?! :yuck:

Rose: HALF-Brother.

Terra: It's still icky!

OOC: Ok, Charles, go ahead. This was more fun than I imagined.
urial angel of death

08-31-06, 07:59 PM		OOKaizer: Why are you in my house? You aren't supposed to be here till tomorrow.

OOUrial: OORei is too lazy to shoot down your every dream so he hired me to.
Charles Phipps

08-31-06, 08:12 PM		Rose: *gets incredibly drunk*

Zella: Oh, its not so bad.

Rose: I'm disgusted beyond all doubt.

Zella: ...you're also drunk on a cap of Nyquil and three non-alcoholic beers.

Rose: I have a sensetive stomach okay!?

Zella: In any case, it's just further proof you're gay.

Rose: No, I'm afraid that's Anti-Matter Universe Rose. You're just seeing gayness because of getting dumped by Xandirr for the genie.

Zella: HE WAS A REAL MAN COMPARED TO YOU! And Aren't we beyond evil doubles being gay? That's so Un-PC.

Rose: No, he's the good one actually.

Zella: Oh.

Rose: It takes a real man to wear tights and a bright green cap with a feather.

Zella: I read it in a book. You're in denial.

Rose: How the hell is my mom TERRA'S MOTHER?

Zella: Well maybe its because she was a ****...I mean, I imagine she's behind every damn half-elf in Khovaire if she's behind you and Terra both.

Rose: You know, it's amazing a Disney-type princess like yourself has such an incredibly foul mouth.

Zella: In any case, I'm just mad because you didn't come rescue me!

Rose: I did too! I got all the way through Level 5 Labyrinth before I had to find a save point because I had business elsewhere!

Michelle: Save point?

Rose: Long story, Eldritch machines left over from the days of the Giants.

Michelle: oh.

Zella: In any case, your Princess isn't in Labyrinth five. You're Princess is in the EIGHTH Labyrinth Rose! The EIGHTH one.

Rose: Damnit! Can't I just go to Labyrinth 8 to begin with!

Zella: NO you Spoony Bard!

Rose; Oh FINE.

*drinks some haunted Rum*

Rum: *UNHOLY SCREAM*

Rose: I'll go get the Ghost inhabiting the wheel, Francis whatshisname and Gregor and we'll go rescue you. Whose holding you Captive anyway?

Zella: KING KAIUS THE THIRD.

Rose: Wait...the NON-Vampire Kaius?

Zella: Uh huh.

Rose: Oh hell.
RPGfan

08-31-06, 08:12 PM		Later, in a tavern. Cyrus Rose is trying to forget what Kaiser did to him. And he hears something interesting one table over.

Sailor: "I'm tellin' yeh. Tha Seren Barbarians 'ave the legendary treasure o' Captain Frances d'Lyrander hidden under they're shores. They've 'ad it since Frances died."

Soldier: "So? You won't be able to make it there before the other traesure hunters without a super fast airship."

Rose: :plotting:

Edit:
Dammit, too late.
Charles Phipps

08-31-06, 08:18 PM		Rose: On the contrary, we recognize that I was in fact IN the tavern when this occured.

zella: I am also imprisoned on the island where said treasure is located.

Rose: FINALLY! SOME PROMISE OF MONEY!

Zella: Whose Frances D'Lyrander anyway?

Rose: Well, remember Pirates of the Carribean?

Zella: Yes.

Rose: He's the guy that the ORIGINAL Captain Jarlot Senior stole the ship from with his son Jarlot.

Zella: And he has a horde of treasure?

Rose: Possibly, since Jarlot hid all of his ill-gotten loot on the island of the man...then forgot its location.

Zella: Uh....huh.

Rose: And how are you imprisoned there and here too?

Zella: Uhh...psychic projection?

OOC: Btw, its time with the 10th page to once more list "Who is your favorite Forgotten Freedom character!" List whom you're favorite character is and what you like about them! Remember, you can't list your own! Feel free to talk about more than one too.
RPGfan

08-31-06, 08:21 PM		Much later.

Frances: "So being drunk by a ghost reapeatedly made you sentient?"

Rum: "Yes. Now stop drinking me."

Rose: "Hey, Frances. Wanna go save princess Zella?"

Frances: "Only if you get me some more rum. And the crew will need rum too."

Rose: "Crew?"

Frances: "They don't know 'ow to ge' out o' the ring yet."

Rose: *groans*
Sir Elton

08-31-06, 08:26 PM		As Halharath leaves the vicinity of Terra and lisa.

Satnak - Listen up you son of a hamster and an elderberry addict. You will tell me everything you know about this demon in my friend, and then you will walk away holding the five bleeding holes in your back.

Halharath - what five ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Satnak - Those...are for messing with my friends.

Tirmek - Do not aggravate her further, If shes anything like her sister...well I'd advise you co-operate.

Ketty - Indeed.
----------------------------------------


Halharath looked up at Satnak. "It's quite simple," said Halharath. "A powerful Quori possesses your friend Lisa." Halharath pulls out a power stone and holds it to his chest. The wounds visibly close as Hal gasps for air. "I know you don't believe me, but this being is manipulating Lisa further. Soon, Lisa will betray you all."

Satnak folds her arms over. "Unlikely."

"It's true, its so true," said Halharath. "She has given herself over the Quori. I was going to fight her to release her from the power of that spirit."

Satnak looked hard and hard at Hal. Finally, she says,"You are not lying to me, are you? Lisa is possessed by one these Quori?"

"Yes," said Halharath. "But Terra had gotten in the way. Somehow, she's more skilled than I am, and beat me. Sora Teraza said that a demon possesses Lisa, and Lisa possessed the whereabouts of my 'brothers': Draj and Sword. I needed the information badly so I can find them and return them to Stillstone Holt."
RPGfan

08-31-06, 08:28 PM		For more information on Frances d'Lyrander and his crew, please post on http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=688766.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-31-06, 08:40 PM		Remember, you can't list your own! Feel free to talk about more than one too. OOC: :mad: Damn. Now I have to pick favorites without making it seem like I'm playing favorites.

Ok, let's see...

Nalfein, because he's a high-powered pyromanaical loser. Though I'm not sure if I can pick him because I've contributed to more than a few of Rei32491's posts (he hasn't posted on this one yet, will eventually).

Volrath, but I may or may not be sucking up to my DM with that comment.

Rose is fun to pick on.

Satnak and Serene are great together.

The Commentary Crew are good sane fun in an otherwise insane thread.

OH! And why hasn't Kithle been here more? I'm suffering from a serious Magnificent Bastard deficiency. Just so long as it's not directed at me.

Kithle: Rats.

Oh! And then there's- *Wack!*

OOKaizer: OW!

Terra: Enough already. You already made me the Captain's half-sister.

OOKaizer: That was OOCharles's fault. I just though it was funny, so I went along with it.

Lisa: You do know this makes Rose Sarah & Elina's real uncle, right?

OOKaizer: Well, yeah. That's why I liked it so much.

Terra: That means we get to hurt you now.

OOKaizer: :eek: :weep:
rampant

08-31-06, 08:41 PM		The Chili

do I need a reason?
---------------------------------

Robrands - MARRIED *feints*

Ernest - Hopeless

Piffany - I ain't carrying him.
--------------------------------

Satnak - I hate pretty boys.

Ketty - Yes you always had a thing for a man with facial scars. Which makes your choice of mates most interesting.

Satnak - You remember the fight, youe saw her metal.

Ketty - Ok that is one wierd fetish.

Satnak - :embarrass

Tirmek - Is that all adults think about?
---------------------------------

Serene - There you are.

Sarah - finally

Satnak - Alright everyone get in.

Sparking and beeping.
urial angel of death

08-31-06, 08:47 PM		My favorite is definately Kanatash

Second is Ketler (This is only if not allowed to pick my own. If I was Volrath would be second and everyone else at or below would be bumped down one, except V who would remain in fifth and Nalfien would be delegated to sixth)

Third is Terra

Fourth Nalfien

Fifth V
Kaizer_Ryu

08-31-06, 08:49 PM		Halharath looked up at Satnak. "It's quite simple," said Halharath. "A powerful Quori possesses your friend Lisa."
OOC: I hate to say it, but we've already done that. It was during the Dreaming Dark arc on the old thread about page 30 or so. Terra and pretty much most of the crew already know how to get rid of them. This was when most of the Ubers didn't have half the power they do now. Jarlot wounded the Dreaming Dark itself.

Sir Elton, for future reference, please don't do things like this unless you talk with the characters owner first. Charles Phipps was Lisa's creator, so he gets more liberty with her than everyone else, but other than that, please create/use your own characters for things like this.
urial angel of death

08-31-06, 08:55 PM		OOC: and now for something completely different (http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-6428771719742321938&q=final+fantasy+9&hl=en)
Gladius_Lucix

08-31-06, 08:56 PM		Liam runs up before they leave.

Liam: Wait! Satnak! I've got the blueprints right here! WAIT!
cypher_zero

08-31-06, 09:02 PM		OOC: Hey, gladius, do me a favor and stick with one avatar please? It's really confusing me...
.
RPGfan

08-31-06, 09:06 PM		Meanwhile.

Frances: "Rose. 'e came ta town. Came ta save, tha princess-"

Rose: "SHUT UP! YOU'VE BEEN SINGING THAT SONG SINCE DUNGEON 6!"

Frances: "Not my fault ye've been under a Sculpt Sound spell tha' made ye unable ta sing."

Rose: "Yes it is. You made your Bard cast it."

Alonzo: *drones on Bagpipes of the Damned*

Rose: "I hate you, and your entire ghost crew."

Frances: "Including Aurala's Double?"

Rose: "I told you never to speak of that again."
Charles Phipps

08-31-06, 09:29 PM		OOC: And my final post for tonight. I have to get back to writing my fantasy novel. Anyone who wants to look over it, feel free to mention and send their e-mail.

Oh and long overdue for the RPG wiki, here's Zella's background.

Zella Ir'Wynarn

Female Elf Aristocrat 5/Video Game Princess (Prestige Class) 10

A Wynarn by marriage to King Boranal's late father King Charming, Zella has had something of a difficult life. When she was a little girl she offended an evil witch whom put her and her family to sleep for a hundred years. A handsome prince saved her only to dump her for a tart whom had satisfied sexually seven virile dwarven men. Then her stepmother proceeded to lock her in a tower where she had to grow her hair exceptionally long to let up the Pizza Boy whom turned out to be her future husband Rose Galan.

Zella Ir'Wynarn has suffered through trying to get her "Happily Ever After" ever since with frequent kidnappings being the usual interruption to her happiness. Amongst the people that have kidnapped her have included Merrix D'Cannith, King Kaius, Erandis D'Vol (whom just put her in an enchanted sleep), the Lord of Blades, Garland the Garlic Knight, Galandworf the Wizard, Kelfka the (Unrelated to the OTHER Keflka) Evil Court Jester, Seppiroath, Koopa the Dragon, Strahd Von Zharovich, and even Mordain Fleshweaver whom transformed her from a blonde to a redhead. Zella has gotten used to this and become somewhat dependent on Rose to rescue her that he's privately begun suspecting she's arranging these kidnappings in order to improve their sex life. Zella used to have dozens of suitors to rescue her but is recovering from the fact the last one revealed his homosexuality while she was dangled over a pit.

Zella's attitude has been significantly dampened by her frequent kidnappings (having the feats "Attractive", "Villain Finder", and "Act Helpless" have been somewhat problematic for her). This has resulted in her being surprisingly bad attituded for such a normally graceful and demure female. This can be used as a vehicle for sarcasm and insults that cut straight to the heart of the psyche. Even Kanatash has been unnerved by a few of her cut downs.

As a Video Game Princess, she wields vague and ill-defined powers to protect the world from evil and to make villains merely lock her up in cages or elaborate deathtraps than actually do any physical harm or sexual assault. She also can bug heroes from anywhere in the world while projecting her consciousness to guilt them into even the most ludricrous of quests.

Zella Ir'Wynarn is played by Mila Jovavich.

IC:

Rose: In any case, Sarah, I think its important that you learn the tricks of being a lycanthrope.

Sarah: Like?

Rose: FETCH GIRL! *toss*

Sarah: Okay...* walks up and picks it up before bringing it back to Rose *

Rose: Tsk Tsk Tsk, so much have you to learn.

Kanatash: Hello Little Girl.

Rose: Oh hey Kanatash, come to help us find the Treasure of Sir Frances?

Kanatash: Yes, inside the treasure is the Seal of the Ages which will allow me to unleash the spirit of the dread Daelkyr Fleshweaver that will proceed to flay the skin off every person in Q'barra before the living comes to envy the dead.

Rose: Oh thank god, I was worried Caralot had cost you your edge.

Kanatash: Then I'm going on a picnic and we'll play frizbee!

Rose: Man, Kanatash, you used to be cool!

Kanatash: if evil is by definition, cool then yes, I did.

Rose: In any case, we're almost to the end of the Khyber Labyrinths that will take us directly into the secret chambers underneath the treasure.

Gregor: And then we return the treasure to the proper owner right?

Rose: Uhhh...sure.

Kanatash: If you'll excuse me, I must meditate on driving children insane ThereisnoSantaThereisnoSantaThereisnoSan ta

Gregor: So, do we dig upwards?

Rose: Nope. *pulls bomb out and lights it* This always works in the Zelda games!

*KABLOOM*

Rose: CHARGE!

*Rose, Gregor, Sarah, and Elin run into King Kaius' bathroom where he's bathing*

Rose: Whoops....must have held the map upside down.
RPGfan

08-31-06, 09:41 PM		Frances: "I love messing with 'is map."
luna18moon

08-31-06, 09:57 PM		Hmmm... My favorite is probably Satnak. She has really evolved since she was brought into being, and she claims 'puff of logic' as hers.
A hole in reality opens up above the ship, and a young girl falls out. A couple seconds later, she hits the ship.
Girl: Oww... Umm.. sraxtsurewrat!
She changes into a succubus.
Girl: Gah!!! :banghead: Must! Study! More! *notices where she is* :confused: How the **** did I get here?
Slaypaw: How indeed?
Girl: Huh? Just so I know, how long have you existed?
Slaypaw: Longer than you, probably. Why?
Girl: Phew! Someone to explain! *to Slaypaw* Basically, I can alter reality with a word. However, I'm not very good. I was afraid I'd summoned you up on accident. Where am I?
Slaypaw: You're on the Forgotten Freedom. What with your seeming insanity, you'll probably fit right in.
Girl: By the way, my name's Kasei.
Slaypaw: Slaypaw. Nice to meet you.

Kasei Asahima
Truespeaker ??
Kasei is a young, very incompetent truespeaker. She basically summons up random effects whenever she utters a truename. She is really kinda childish, and is often heard saying 'oops' and calling for help from actual spellcasters. She may be overpowered, but remember, the effects are completely random. She is more likely to turn a teammate into a harmless insect than anything else.
rampant

08-31-06, 10:30 PM		Satnak - Bloody crazy 'ficer. Your lucky it didn't take your legs off at the hips.

Terra - *Regenerate*

Tirmek - I gottago get ready, here are your seat passes.
-exits-

Satnak - Ok section 16.

The "stands" are floating platforms scattered around the course at various altitudes and angles. Each ha view screens for parts of the race too far from that section or behind a curve in the track.

16 is near the start/finish line. As such they see tirmek wearing a brown and grey jumpsuit and helmet, getting into a massive crystal shard. at 12 feet long and about 3 across at the widest points, this thing is a treasure hunter's dream. He slides his arms and legs into diagonally set tubes on its sides, and a faint hum rises from the gem.

His opponent is a Teenaged femal half orc with hair dyed white. she uses a smaller crytal as a board.

The announcer speaks.

Kes - Ok folks we got a dousy here. The precocious, Terrible Tirmek vs the Mauling Maven Meshka.
Kaizer_Ryu

08-31-06, 10:54 PM		OOC: I guess I'll get this moving. This happens either before or after the Skife races. Doesn't really matter which.

IC:

Halharath: Where are we?

Terra: Lisa's mind. You said the Quori possessed her, right? I believe it is merely hitching a ride.

Halharath: What makes you say that?

Terra: I have an empathic link with her. I am a former Quori Mindhunter. I know my love heart and soul. No Quori could hide from me if it took outright control.

Halharath: Sora Teraza was quite clear. She had given herself over to the Quori.

Terra: She can only guess by looking at others around Lisa. I told you before, me and my family are beyond the power of even the greatest Seer in Eberron.

Halharath: And Lisa is unaware of what we are doing?

Terra: I will explain it to her later. Alerting her will only make it harder to locate our prey as well as endanger her further.

After much searching, the two find a power signature hidden beneath the normal workings of Lisa's mind.

Terra: Hello there.

Quori: You! How can you-?! You cannot be here!

Terra: :devil: I'm glad I'm still as infamous a thousand years after I tormented you as the day you sealed me.

Halharath: Wait, are you...the Nameless One?!

Terra: That I am. Though in a different body. Don't worry. I won't kill him yet.

In a flash of Sorcery and Psionics, the Quori is bound in a mental cage between the two of them in a matter of seconds.

Quori: Gaaahhh!!!!

Terra: Ah...still got it.

Halharath: You are far more than you let on.

Terra: That is a rule of thumb on the Forgotten Freedom. Remember that.

Back on the ship, Terra binds a Redshirt with a sigil in her own blood. They then force the trapped Quori to inhabit the body of the unfortunate killer of kittens.

Halharath: Where did you learn this sigil?

Terra: I have three lives and over ten thousand years of knowledge to draw from. Such a thing is not hard.

Redshirt/Quori: Curssssssse you...

Terra: SILENCE!

The Redshirt immediately feezes.

Terra: Ask him anything you wish. This sigil will let you extract the answers to any five questions you have for him. After that, you must wait a day to ask more. When you are done, I shall give him a fate worse than even those bestowed upon the Elan's.

OOC: Ok, go with this, Sir Elton. I don't mean to be a jerk, but you essentially hijacked my character. A big no no on this thread if you're being serious. Comedic hijacking is one thing. If you intend to do something serious with someone elses character, run it by them first, next time. Thanks in advance.
cypher_zero

08-31-06, 11:05 PM		OOC: Hmm... I just noticed I've been sig'd by luna; or rather my character, Terrek. Coolness. :cool:
.
Crystalforged

09-01-06, 12:45 AM		Favorite character huh? Well seeing as my obvious and uanabashedly biased option is out... Hm, tough choice.

Caralot of course I suppose, she's like Kanatash's female counterpart. Except she's not technically female.

I like the campers in general and Nemesis in particular. (hey, i didn't create her, I just hijacked her a lot)

I like the more complex personality Satnak has developed compared to the rather one dimensional "hulk smash" mentality she used to have. I'm also fond of many of they other characters from Satnak's home dimension.

Oh, and I have to mention Cheese. Cudos to Rei for introducing perhaps the most hillarious crew member yet.

In other news...

---

Flamekeep, Thrane.

Messenger: Cardinal Krozen, sir, I have a delivery for you.

Krozen: Yes, yes, just leave it on the desk. I'll see to it later.

Messenger: A thousand pardons Cardinal but I was told this was priority mail. I was instructed to say it required your immediate attention.

Krozen: (taking the letter) Fine, I'll take a look at it.

Krozen glances at the letter for the first time and his face visible pales. Lines of sweat begin running down his face almost immediately.

Messenger: Sir?

Krozen: OUT! NOW!

Messenger: (obviously confused) Yes Cardinal. (salutes and leaves)

Krozen looks down again at the letter, or more specifically the return adress. The Forgotten Freedom. With trembling hands he breaks the seal and pulls out a sheet of parchment. The message reads:

Greetings your Cardinalship, you are hereby formally invited to the marraige of one Caralot and Kanatash. The date and location of the ceremony is yet to be announce but you will be made aware of when these details have been decided. Your arrival is expected within the week and it will be accompanied by torture and suffering beyond your wildest imagination. Your attendance is not voluntary and should you choose not to come you will be found forthwith and horrors shall be visited upon you that will rend your immortal soul beyond all hope of redemption.

Hugs and kisses,
Kanatash
cypher_zero

09-01-06, 01:01 AM		Hugs and kisses,
Kanatash
Kanatash: And that Campers is true psychological torture. Questions?

OOC: Fun stuff there. Ahhh... that takes me back. Anyways....

As far as fav characters go, I'm going to have to echo almost everyone else here and say that I'm rather fond of the "deeper" Satnak; in part because I helped contribte with the addition of Serene. Oddly, this is one of my (Terrek's) few plots that actually worked out.

I am rather disappointed that no one likes Terrek that much, but then he is kind of unlikeable isn't he? Hence the reinvention of him... which I'm presently working on (and about a million other things).

EDIT: Also, it's in my sig but in case you ignore those things like I do usually, I am looking for players for an Online Ebberon game I'll be DMing. Thought it might be interesting to actually play with some of the demented minds on here :evillaugh: Check out the thread Here (http://boards1.wizards.com/leaving.php?destination=http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=695007&origin=)
DOOM!
rampant

09-01-06, 02:15 AM		OORampant - Basking in praise of deeper satnak.

Kithle - You know she's gonna kill you when she catches you.

OORampant - What other force in non-existance could drive me to hide here.

Barney - I love you

OORampant - :twitch:

Kithle - now you know why i was willing to help you

OORampant - And why you "lost" my superscope.

Kithle - Oh come on how long were you gonna riff the Game Masta

OORampant - until someone stole my pants.

OOC: You can tell I like that comic
-----------------------------------

Kes - Meshka the favorite for this year's cup, but Tirmek has been bouncing up the leagues faster than the paperwork. Have we finally found the Pilot whos gonna give this Knightmare Nephew of the Breaker Prime pause.

-------------------------------

Meshka - To quote Papa "I'ma gonna smash you"

Tirmek - ...(focuses on course ahead)

The "track" is a long sinuos half-pipe of grey and tan crystal that loops circles, swoops, and inverts itself for about five miles before looping back in on itself.

Meshka - What the little Rakshasa too good to talk to us mortals.

Tirmek - *HEY ISN'T THIS SATNAK'S TRICK GLARE*

Meshka - (i.h.h. note do not trash talk the kitty)
-------------------------------

Kes - AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND THEIR OFF!!!

Tirmek and Meshka both hit it just as the flag drops, Tirmek pulls ahead quickly, but as they get close to the first turn Meshka is begining to regain ground.
---------------------------------
Lisa - Wow their really moving.

Terra - I'm just watching this time hang it!!:yuck:

Satnak - Its early in the season its only a three lap race. Plus this is one of the smaller tracks so no more than 5 more minutes. There will be other races after this. This is a duel race rig so its more about flat out stlye here. They keep them short so the racers don't hold back.

Elina - Go kitty!

Sarah - he's not a cat he's a dtari...d'thark?

Ketty - d'Tharmis I wouldn't advise calling him a Rakshasa. *sigh* it shames him deeply,... I've tried to convince him its not his fault, and I think he knows that, but.... He absolutely loathes being identified with his father's people. On the one hand I don't want him becoming anything like the brainwashing cretin his father was. On the other I'm worried he'll drive himself crazy denying an intrinsic part of his nature.
cypher_zero

09-01-06, 02:20 AM		OOC: Hmmm.... Do I forsee a possible love intrest between Tirmek an one of T&L's kids? Hmm? *nudge*
.
rampant

09-01-06, 02:37 AM		OOC: Pretty much why I tweaked the timeline for the Island to keep him in the proper age bracket, but even so thats a while down the line, he's 8 and their 9. I'm not going to pressure Kaizer on this, but just trying to keep some options open.
-----------------

As the racers enter the first corner, Meshka is forced to let up a little as Tirmek's larger craft blocks her path.
---------

Ketty - His doesn't corner as well or have the higher max speed. It does have accel a turbo rig as well as better control at high speed. He's gonna attempt to keep her back as long as possible then if she gets past dash around with the turbo. If she gets overly troublesome he might be tempted to try knocking her off her board. Especially if she was heavy handed with the trash talk.
--------------------

All through the loop-de-loop Tirmek continues to block Meshka.
Charles Phipps

09-01-06, 02:44 AM		Vampire Hunter Rose: Well unfortunately, one of you is doomed to have a romance with a bishounen vampire hunter that I'll train to be my successor.

Sarah: Say what?

Elin: Heck no!

Vampire Hunter Rose: I'm sorry kids but you're pretty much doomed to this lifestyle. You're Lycanthropes yet also good. Do you know what that means? It means that a relationship will be full of ANGST. There's no stopping it.

Elin: I don't want to be a angst inducing love interest!

Sarah: Wait...how Bishounen?
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-01-06, 08:22 AM		The Commentary Crew are good sane fun in an otherwise insane thread.
OOC: :weep:

OOcat: :bored: Is attention all you care about?

OOC: Pay no attention to that. It's just a manifestation of my inner mind.

OOcat: Dude, give it a rest. By now they should have figured out that there's no divide between OOC and IC in you.

Bunny: Intervention time!

OOcat: Hey… :blink: what are you doing with that Disney CD—"poor unfortunate souls…"

OOC: I'd have to say that Jarlot is always my favorite, even if he'd retired right now. Even when being comic he had more depth than Rose.

Both Kithle and Kanatash satisfy the desire in me to completely mess with the world. :devil:

(And why is Krozen being invited to Caralot/Kanatash's wedding?)
Kaizer_Ryu

09-01-06, 09:37 AM		OOC: Pretty much why I tweaked the timeline for the Island to keep him in the proper age bracket, but even so thats a while down the line, he's 8 and their 9. I'm not going to pressure Kaizer on this, but just trying to keep some options open.
OOC: I was kind of wondering if you had something like that in mind. Though I agree it's going to be a while down the line, I'm not against it. Could be quite interesting. I weep for those poor kids and what we're going to put them through. :D :P
Crystalforged

09-01-06, 09:42 AM		(And why is Krozen being invited to Caralot/Kanatash's wedding?)
Kanatash: I still haven't told you much about my parentage have I?

OOCrystalforged: He's just joking there. The actually reason he invited him is because, well, he hates him with a passion.

Kanatash: ...and I can't think of anything more terrible to inflict on him then to invite him to ANOTHER wedding on the Forgotten Freedom.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-01-06, 09:47 AM		Kanatash: ...and I can't think of anything more terrible to inflict on him then to invite him to ANOTHER wedding on the Forgotten Freedom.
OOKaizer: Where he gets to meet his Grandchildren. :plotting: :devil:

Kanatash: Always a bonus. :schemes:
Endless_Helix

09-01-06, 09:53 AM		OOC: Hmm... Favorite chars... I have to say that I rather liked Doog and Michael's interaction. Brilliant Stuff. For a single character, Stupid MK I was the best (meaning back when Stupid wasn't the LOBster). A close second being Pholly (Not to be confused with his dimensionally induced twin, Phollie, who is mostly my fault.). Despite his Uber status, Kithle makes third. Allen is a solid fourth, and I have to say I've always had a soft spot for V for Vengence, making fifth. He has to be fifth, because otherwise he's pointless... read the original comic for why I'm pointing this out... (leaves Ludwig van Beethoven's Fifth playing quietly.)
rampant

09-01-06, 09:56 AM		OOC: So they can torment him. Duh!
--------------------------

Kes - He's at again folks, Tirmek has no intention of letting Meshka get control of this race, solid strategy, but not very entertaining.

As the racers close in on the first lap, Meshka manages to get alongside Tirmek.

Tirmek - *GLARE* Pulls one hand free of his crystal skife *Call Weapon* and brings a giant flail down tangling meska's foot.

Meska falls, manages to stay on her board, but is forced to slow dramatically while maintaining balance. Tirmek zips on gaining a considerble lead.
--------------------------

Lisa - Is that legal?

Satnak - In the upper leagues yes. Wow he's good.

Ketty - She must have ****** him off, he rarely is the first one to get that aggressive.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-01-06, 10:10 AM		FX-OOcat: Just then a blast falls from the sky, shattering both skifes. While Tirmek and Meshka are good enough psychics not to fall, they never saw it coming. From overhead comes the mighty roar of a dragon, and suddenly the sky is filled with them as they descend on the Island…

Honorable-OOcat: Ha! I found you, evil one who does things purely for enjoyment and does not think of the feelings of others! You shall not break into this story!

Plotline-OOcat: Hey, they did it to me with Sutekh and 13! I'm just having FX return the favor.

Reason-OOcat: This is all the result of not understanding the concept of cooperative storytelling.

Enjoyment-OOcat: Whooohoooooo! We're gonna shake up the Isl-land!

Detail-OOcat: Maybe they'll rebuild it so the rest of us can understand it better.

OOcat: :bored: And you now see what idiots I have to work with.
*****
OOKaizer: Where he gets to meet his Grandchildren.
Bunny: Not to mention the son who hates his guts and tried to rip them out the last time they saw each other. :cool:
urial angel of death

09-01-06, 10:43 AM		OOC: More Krozen fun yippey.
rampant

09-01-06, 10:55 AM		OOCat - *smugness*

OORampant has found a superscope.

OOCat - :eek: :gah:
----------------------

The biggest :censored: Dragon of them all erupts forth from the volcano at the centter of the island.

Forbes - :censored: Grasgeth get some :censored: Glasses you :censored:, son of a :censored::censored:

-----------------------
OOC: this post has been edited for language, because it amuses me.
-----------------------

Forbes - Stop :censored: landing in the middle of my :censored: tracks.
-----------------------

Tirmek - This will take a week in a repair rig to fix.

Meshka - Your telling me.

Tirmek - Oh shove it, yours just got smashed in half, mine is in pieces.
-----------------------

Tirmek - Well our race is cancelled, but the others will resume once forbes gets those Dragons off the track...Or he might leave them there as an obstacle. Meh I'm gonna have to get ahead on the homework so I have the free time to regain my standings after my Skife is fixed.

Elina and Sarah - HOMEWORK!!

Tirmek - I'm planning on taking a few of the more acedemic classes, as well. You will be required to take some yourselves, but which are your concern. Ooh thier starting up again, (starts pressing buttons on his view screen) I'll have the chili-taco and a lemonade, anybody else want something?
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-01-06, 01:20 PM		OOCat - *smugness*

OORampant has found a superscope.

OOCat - :eek: :gah:
Super-Defense-OOcat: Ha-ha! I have the solution.

OOrampant: *ZAP!*

Expendable-OOcat: Ow.

Explaination-OOcat: It wasn't meant to be a real thing happening. Just FX-OOcat talking.

Proofing-OOcat: Damn, knew we forgot to exposition something.
******
Kanatash: So, Caralot, what sort of thing do we need to do for your side of the wedding?

Caralot: What do you mean? I've already sent out my invitations. Erk's Place is back, so the catering is taken care off, if you don't mind costumed superheroes.

Kanatash: No, I mean religiously. You don't talk that much about being a devotee of Thyrs.

Caralot: It's a freeform lifestyle. There aren't even any procedures for marriage.

Kanatash: Huh, really, you never said.

Caralot: :) That's because it's not important. *kiss*

Kanatash: :D Well, then I'll get started on my……… :blink: What do you mean, costumed superheroes?
luna18moon

09-01-06, 02:58 PM		Cats: (still) :pint:
Slaypaw is mewing out a song.
Fluffy: It's me against the world (oh what a stupid day)...
OOC: Terrek is probably my second favorite, I just didn't mention it earlier.
RPGfan

09-01-06, 06:54 PM		The group stands before the nest of the Dire Spitwad Bats. Rose explains the plan to defeat them after using the Save Point to revive the party twice, while Frances takes a leak (don't ask me how he does it when he's a ghost).

Rose: "Okay, these guys have been giving us a lot of trouble lately, so before we try this again, do we need anything from these guys?"

Zella: "Yeah. They have the swordkey. It opens the door to dungeon 8."

Rose: *sigh* "Okay then. First thing we need is for Alonzo to go in with the debuffers and AoE people so that we can hit them with Alonzo's Dirge and a few AoE's to try and slow them down. Then Katanash, you'll have to go in and use your Fear psionics to scatter them, so we won't have to fight a bunch at once. Next, I'll come in with the tankers and healers to try and whittle their numbers down while the healers buff and heal. Tankers, try to keep the Dire Spitwad Bats away from the casters so they can't tangle them up in spitwads, because then they won't be able to cast anymore. Say, Katanash, could you do a quick number crunch for us?"

Katanash: "Yeah, give me a minute." *thinks* "Okay, I'm coming up with a 33.33- repating of course- percent chance of survival."

Rose: "Hmmm. That's better than usual. Well, looks like we have-"

Frances: "Alright chums, I'm back. Let's do this! FRAAAAAAAAAAAANCES D'LYRANDER!" *charges in*

Rose: "Dammit Frances!"

OOC: Yes, that is a Leeroy Jenkins referance.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-01-06, 07:51 PM		drifting through the corodors of the forgoten fredom Ash begins to sing.
"Oh in Ryleth,
Mighty Ryleth
Cuthulu sleeeeps tonight.
Deep and dreaming,
He lies scheaming.
untill the stars are right..."
*****
Chance has found his new quarters, among the lesser used crew.
Chanse "So, poker game. Deal me in and get ready to luse."
Lesser used crew "Your a changling? cool, finaly a chick for the strip poker! :w00t: "
Chanse o.O "Get away from me you freeks... :uh-huh: Eled!"
(ooc: Fave charicters
1: Captain Jarlot the one, the only, the Iraplaceable.
2: Terra/lisa/satnack [so hard to chose, ironicly I wasnt that fond of Satnak but as she developed she became a fave.]
3: Kantash. )
Kaizer_Ryu

09-01-06, 09:40 PM		Elina and Sarah - HOMEWORK!!
Terra: We told you...

Sarah: :( More homework?

Tirmek: More?

Lisa: Yeah. We've been homeschooling them for some time now.

Terra: We started with basic strategy and general fighting techniques. Mostly showing them the positives and negatives of each basic class and style. At least from our universe.

Lisa: We've started them on the more advanced stuff in the last year based on their individual talents.

Elina: :D Magic theory is fun!

Sarah: :bored: It's all a bunch of signs and gibberish. My favorite's "The Art of Not Being Seen".

Satnak: I can only assume it involves less fire than Nalfein's version.

Terra: :rolleyes: It's hard not to. But it's a kind of variation on what we showed you before.

Lisa: Then there's the duels.

Elina: :D I won last time.

Sarah: :P Next time you're mine.

Tirmek: How is that homework?

Lisa: We award points based on their successful use of what we've taught them and deduct points for mistakes. Bonus points are rewarded for unique usage of their knowledge.

Tirmek: So it's possible for either both or neither of them to pass? Nice.
Charles Phipps

09-01-06, 10:19 PM		OOC: I'm very fond of Terra.

Afterwards come Kanatash and probably Satnak.
rampant

09-01-06, 10:26 PM		Ketty - Mostly I just get him a few tomes, show him the exercises my parents taught me, and let him loose, he pretty much trains himself. I know about as much about incarnum as rock so he's been researching that on his own.

Tirmek - Yes, I've been eager to study your techniques Aunt Satnak.

Satnak - Of course, get me a chili bowl with cheese and a Liquid Keelhauling.

Tirmek - Appears there is no such drink.

Satnak - Fine a Deathspiral then (think peanutbutter dr.pepper)

Serene - The Chicken Lasagna and an Iced Tea please.

Terra - The salad special and water.

Tirmek - Ok one tossed tendrilicous, and a water.

Lisa - Salmon and Water.

Elina - bbq shrimp and milk, please.

Sarah - Steak rare, Cherry juice.

The group spends the rest of the evening watching the races.

Elina - Amazing!

Sarah - Must resist urge to bite fenders.

Tirmek - Tomorrow we select classes, and take placement exams. Have you considered what your going to study? You can change directions later, but its easier to choose from the multitude of courses when you have some sort of goal.
-------------------
OOC: Kaizer?
warforged_assasin

09-01-06, 10:33 PM		Sebastion Belmont the third
male half-teifling/ half aasimar half-elf
cleric10 (unknown diety)/expert5

ship new navigator and lost son of jarlot his secret is know by orse but he dosnt talk to anyone but rose. a srtange presence cames from him but if something bad happens he smiles a sick smile but he tends to run away from battle the "real' reason pholly is alive he heals him after each explosion.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-01-06, 11:04 PM		Tirmek - Tomorrow we select classes, and take placement exams. Have you considered what your going to study? You can change directions later, but its easier to choose from the multitude of courses when you have some sort of goal.
Elina: I was interested in Blade Weaving. I haven't really gotten into Psionics yet, but since Mom said this place focuses on it, I'm gonna start with more basic stuff.

Sarah: Aunt Satnak told me about Berzerkers. From what she told me, it sounds like something I wanna try.
rampant

09-01-06, 11:06 PM		Tolos - IN YOUR FACE FORBES!!!:dancin: :dancin:

Levy - No love for the breakers it seems.

Forbes - :P
Rei32491

09-01-06, 11:31 PM		OOC: I've been wanting to do this for a long time, but I just didn't have time on the old thread. I'll post my characters' stats and general bios later for any fresh me- I mean...new posters.

IC:

Nalfein: (in his room) MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I HAVE ACHIEVED IMMORTALITY AT LAST!

Volrath: *walking in* What are you talking about?

Nalfein: I'm a lich...can't you tell?

Volrath: Hmm, (pulls out a curved blade).

Nalfein: Where did you get that, and what's its purpose?

Volrath: :shifty: I will reveal that at a later time. (cuts Nalfein's arm)

Nalfein: (as blood spurts out) OWWWWWW! WTF! (pulls out a Phylactery) Isn't this working?

Volrath: Well, one way to find out. (blows Nalfein up)

Nalfein reforms.

Nalfein: THAT REALLY HURT! :mad:

Volrath: Well it works. :P

Nalfein: ...wait. I'm a Lich, but, I feel pain?

Volrath: Give me your notes, show me what you did.

Looks at the notes.

Volrath: :headexplo Its spelled fhtagn!

Nalfein: :confused:

Volrath: You spelled it fthagn! Moron...

Nalfein: Son of a-!

Volrath: You realize what this means?

Nalfein: What?

Volrath: ...You're still alive.

OOC: Dun Dun DUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNN...

Just so you know, Nalfein reforms at the speed of Plot. Accept for now that he can willfully ignore rules of the game whenever it's funny.

And no destroying his Phylactery. :P
Kaizer_Ryu

09-01-06, 11:43 PM		Levy - No love for the breakers it seems.
OOC: Satnak's already the Breaker Prime, Blade Weaving looked really cool, and the Lycanthropy seemed to naturally predispose Sarah toward Berzerker.

BTW, the fender remark was hilarious. :D
Charles Phipps

09-02-06, 12:35 AM		*is suspended by chains, half dressed*

Rose: Well this is a revolting development.

King Kaius: Now, I have you in my clutches!

Rose: This isn't a gay thing is it?

King Kaius: *pause* Why do you ask?

Rose: Uh...Huh.

King Kaius: The men in my harem are for blood purposes only.

Rose: So you DENY it.

King Kaius: ....yes.

Rose: In any case, we have to escape now.

King Kaius: And how's that?

Rose: Well you have to send your beautiful women brides to seduce me in order to unlock the chains and get me to cooperate.

King Kaius: Why don't I just torture you?

Rose: What's your sense motive?

King Kaius: It's...CRAP.

Rose: Yes, my bluff is higher.

King Kaius: Damn you! This is so unfair! How the hell do you do stuff like this?

Rose: I also have influenced your reactions from unfriendly to neutral.

King Kaius: WHAT!?

Rose: Don't you FEEL the neutrality here?

King Kaius: I feel very p***** off right now!

Rose: Well not at me.

King Kaius: OH FINE! Send in the Vampire Brides.

*three extremely sultry women with heaving bossoms enter the room*

*Frances' ghost pops in*

Frances: The others say that they're ready to esca....GOOD LORDY!

Rose: Tell them to hold off for...

*pause*

Rose: Enhanced Constitution.....one pint each....but using my Bardic Cure Light Wounds.....Three hours.

Frances: Eh?

Rose: You think I could go four? I mean, I'm a machine. Six hours is my limit though. These aren't exactly professionals though and I'm trying to rush myself.

Frances: But the TREASURE man.

Rose: What happens in Karrnath, stays in Karrnath!
rampant

09-02-06, 01:10 AM		As the group packs up for the night.

Satnak - We'll be by tomorrow, its the first day so I figure It'll be pretty crazy.

Tirmek - See you two tomorrow, and please *one fanged smile* try not to lose to anyone. I'd hate to be the undisputed top of my class.

Elina - :rolleyes:

Sarah - You got your wish 4-eyes, consider this rivalry on.
Charles Phipps

09-02-06, 01:29 AM		Lilly: POW! POW! POW!

*A 10 year old boy plays with a sword far too large for him that he nevertheless uses with gaunlets of ogre power*

Sarah: Who the hell are you?

Lilly: I am the Fearless Vampire Killer Lilly!

Sarah: Lilly is a girl's name.

Lilly: So is Rose, but that doesn't stop my parent here.

Sarah: You're ROSE'S SON!?

Lilly: Yes, I'm his son...FROM THE FUTURE.

Sarah: That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my entire life.

Lilly: Well, here's another weird fact, I'm actually not THIS dimension's Rose's son.

Sarah: Sarah is confused.

*A tail pops out of her dress as she wags it while rubbing her head*

Lilly: Well, I'm from the alternate dimension of Eberron that Caralot comes from. There, Rose is my mom!

Sarah: *blink*

Lilly: Yep! Now I'm the SAVIOR of that planet and all I need to do is find the seven pendants and...stuff.

Sarah: ...you're ten.

Lilly: HEY! IT WORKED FOR LINK!

Sarah: Rose told you about these alleged pendants didn't he?
rampant

09-02-06, 03:13 AM		Island

Tirmek - Hmmm maybe axes tommorow.

Ketty - Don't forget to wear the practice armor not the Dress-plate.
------------------------

Forgotten Freedom

Satnak - Oh by the way here's the gear they'll need I'd advise they sstart wearing them tomorrow, this should just be a minor annoyance at this point, but believe me it gets tougher. Your kids are used to being sealed though so they might actually have an edge once they get the hang of it.
------------------------

OOC: Kaizer now is the time to pick their basic weapon and armor selection, they get masterwork crysal versions, nothing fancy but standard issue for the island.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-02-06, 07:49 AM		Lilly: Well, I'm from the alternate dimension of Eberron that Caralot comes from. There, Rose is my mom!
Caralot: First I've heard of it. Never adopted any kids. Didn't have to life to take care of them.

Silver: Sorry, only Non-Existants are allowed on Team Commentary.

13: So he's the son of a female Rose from the future of Caralot's Eberron?

Bunny: Can't be. He has gauntlets of ogre strength. Those don't exist there.

Silver: Clearly he must be some sort time hiccup pearl, like Jaela Jarlot is Jaela but completely human and from this Eberron but in a timeline where the Silver Flame didn't happen which now no longer exists but she does because the Forgotten Freedom has formed a shell of chaotic freedom around her.

13: Okay, let's go over this one more time: I'm Long Winded Explanation…
Lilly: Yep! Now I'm the SAVIOR of that planet and all I need to do is find the seven pendants and...stuff.
OOcat: It's three pendants, seven crystals, three stones, or six medals.

13: And OOKaizer thought he had it bad.

OOcat: I just have a good memory. Except I forget how many pieces of the Triforce it was.

Silver: Does Caralot's planet need a savior?

OOcat: It's just OOCharles taking some liberties. Ignore him.
RPGfan

09-02-06, 11:21 AM		*is suspended by chains, half dressed*

Rose: Well this is a revolting development.

King Kaius: Now, I have you in my clutches!

Rose: This isn't a gay thing is it?

King Kaius: *pause* Why do you ask?

Rose: Uh...Huh.

King Kaius: The men in my harem are for blood purposes only.

Rose: So you DENY it.

King Kaius: ....yes.

Rose: In any case, we have to escape now.

King Kaius: And how's that?

Rose: Well you have to send your beautiful women brides to seduce me in order to unlock the chains and get me to cooperate.

King Kaius: Why don't I just torture you?

Rose: What's your sense motive?

King Kaius: It's...CRAP.

Rose: Yes, my bluff is higher.

King Kaius: Damn you! This is so unfair! How the hell do you do stuff like this?

Rose: I also have influenced your reactions from unfriendly to neutral.

King Kaius: WHAT!?

Rose: Don't you FEEL the neutrality here?

King Kaius: I feel very p***** off right now!

Rose: Well not at me.

King Kaius: OH FINE! Send in the Vampire Brides.

*three extremely sultry women with heaving bossoms enter the room*

*Frances' ghost pops in*

Frances: The others say that they're ready to esca....GOOD LORDY!

Rose: Tell them to hold off for...

*pause*

Rose: Enhanced Constitution.....one pint each....but using my Bardic Cure Light Wounds.....Three hours.

Frances: Eh?

Rose: You think I could go four? I mean, I'm a machine. Six hours is my limit though. These aren't exactly professionals though and I'm trying to rush myself.

Frances: But the TREASURE man.

Rose: What happens in Karrnath, stays in Karrnath!

Later

Frances: "Why did ye 'ave ta rub in tha fact tha', because I'm a ghost, I can't f*ck the women in Kaius's harem? Was it because of the rum?"

Rose: "No."

Frances: "Was it because I got us killed by the Dire Spitwad Bats four times?"

Rose: "No."

Frances: "Was it because I messed with ye map and made ye blow up Kaius's bathroom?"

Rose: "That was you?"

Frances: "Uhhh... no."

Rose: "You rolled a natural 1 on your Bluff."

Frances: "Dammit. But why did ye 'ave ta rub in tha fact tha', because I'm a ghost, I can't f*ck the women in Kaius's harem?"

Rose: "Becuase of who you did f*ck."

Frances: "Hey, I thought Zella's psychic projection was a ghost. I needed ta f*ck someone."

Rose: "She screamed in her prison so loudly that she was moved to dungeon 20, along with your treasure."

Frances: "I'm so glad ye don' 'ave any Ghost Touch weapons."
rampant

09-02-06, 11:38 AM		Rose - Actually thats why I brought him.

Azjihazi - Whats up big boy.

Rose - Wrong time for that one.
RPGfan

09-02-06, 11:50 AM		Rose - Actually thats why I brought him.

Azjihazi - Whats up big boy.

Rose - Wrong time for that one.
:heehee
By the way, who is Azjihazi? I'm having a little trouble memorizing all of the crew members.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-02-06, 11:55 AM		OOC: Ok, I've been thinking about starting equipment, and here's what I decided. I'm just stating the original weapon type, so whatever they'd become as Masterwork Crystal.

Sarah -

Armor: Studded Leather

Weapons: Short Sword and Composite Shortbow

Elina -

Armor: Studded Leather

Weapon: Quarterstaff and Composite Shortbow
rampant

09-02-06, 12:21 PM		Next day.

Elina - The bow is nice, I love these arrows, but the headband makes me tingly and the bracers and greaves are heavy.

Satnak - THeir supposed to be heavy other wise they wouldn't be weights. And just try to ignore the tingly from the head band its a distraction, you will also note a reduction in the effectiveness of your other abilities. Eventually you will compensate, then we increase the amount of restriction/distraction and you will compensate then the cycle continues till your dragging the equivalent of a small country everywhere.

Sarah - :eek:

Satnak - REady for your first day?:)
Endless_Helix

09-02-06, 12:42 PM		:heehee
By the way, who is Azjihazi? I'm having a little trouble memorizing all of the crew members.

Ajihazi is a kalashtar soulknife with extreme disociative identity disorder (multiple personalities) from nearly getting possessed by a quori. One of these personalities is known as "Maisy of Elm Street" and acts like a prostitute. Usually he's Ajihazi or the Child, meaning he's either getting Marish to read him stories or humourously attempting to find and slay "The Trouser Titan". The Quori has only really "come out" twice and is normally buried by the other four personalities, but once it seriously hurt Kanatash (back when he was just "Khanatash") and the other time it strangled a kitten in front of two kids just to prove a point to another personality. He's a dinosaur from way way back (I think back on page 12 or 13 of the original thread).
urial angel of death

09-02-06, 02:55 PM		Volrath: Sarah aren't you forgetting something in your starting equipment.

Sarah: Oh poop. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to forget them. I was just thinking about being a beserker and please- *breaks down into sobs* :weep:

Volrath: It's okay just try to remeber next time.

Volrath begins piling all sorts of thing into Sarah backpack. They include a common copy of Nameless Cults, purple candles, several sheets of still bloody parchment, many wells of oddly colored ink, bone quills, formal robes, a goat, and a bunny.

Sarah: So heavy.

Volrath: If you had remembered I would have given you a bag of holding.

OOC: Rampant what is the difference between Breaker and Beserker. They seem to be about the same "Hulk Smash!"
rampant

09-02-06, 03:18 PM		OOC: A Berserker Relies on massive surges, and berserk frenzies. Often driven by feral instinct, intense emotion, or trauma. Rage, Frenzy, Wild surge, Transformation.

A breaker relies on destroying an opponents ability to fight. Most are more subtle than Satnak, she's hardly a typical example, but her use of strength sapping necrocarnum is an example of breaker behaivior. counterspell, negate, debuff, drain,
urial angel of death

09-02-06, 04:25 PM		OOC: So they use statis inducing magics. Why those suck.
Charles Phipps

09-02-06, 04:41 PM		Lilly: Well I don't ACTUALLY have any ability to save the world according to Miss Caralot.

Sarah: Oh?

Lilly: Yeah, but obviously I'm going to.

Sarah....Eh?

Lilly: BECAUSE I'M THE CHOSEN ONE.

Sarah: Unless you get KILLED or something.

Lilly: Well...yes.

Sarah: And who Chose you anyway?

Lilly: Well....me I guess.

Sarah: Well Caralot says you're a time hiccup anyway.

Lilly: Well, I sorta made up the part about being from the future.

Sarah: And the Gauntlets you claim are sacred relics?

Lilly: Well the crew member whom had them before doesn't need them! Michelle has delicate hands now!
rampant

09-02-06, 04:52 PM		OOC: So they use statis inducing magics. Why those suck.

OORampant - O'reealy *bio*

OOUrial - *2369* ouch!!
urial angel of death

09-02-06, 05:05 PM		OOC: Bio is an attack spell with a statis side affect. Beside I was refrencing the flash video "about random battles". Also if you try to hit me with count down or something similar realize that I am wearing a ribbon.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-02-06, 05:28 PM		OOKaizer: You know, even if you have the ribbon, which is girly in the first place...

OOUrial: I'm very confident in my masculinity.

OOKaizer: ...it won't protect you from Countdown since you play by FFVI rules.

OORampant: :devil:

OOUrial: :eek: :gah:
urial angel of death

09-02-06, 05:29 PM		OOC: I also have a protect ring.
rampant

09-02-06, 05:36 PM		OORampant - Yoink!

OOUrial - Hah missed the ring

OORampant - Got the ribbon *Zombify*

OOKaizer - Mega-pheonix

OOUrial - Jerkwipes- urk

----------------------

Satnak - Okay kids any last things that need to be said or done before your first day do or say now.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-02-06, 05:50 PM		Satnak - Okay kids any last things that need to be said or done before your first day do or say now.OOC: Oh, I've been waiting for this. :devil:

IC:

Terra: Hang on, girls. Let mommy take one last look at you.

Elina: :rolleyes: Mom.

Terra: Your collar's crooked. *begins fussing with Elina's*

Sarah: Mom, please.

Terra: Oh, dear. You've got a little smudge on your cheek. *licks her thumb and reaches for Sarah*

Sarah: MOM!

Terra: Now, now, no fussing. There. All better. Good luck and do your best.

Lisa: Listen to what your Aunt Satnak and your teachers say.

Elina: *sigh* We will...

As they walk away, Lisa whispers to Terra.

Lisa: :) You did that just to bug them, didn't you?

Terra: :D Oh, you bet. How often do I get that kind of opportunity?

OOC: I'd be willing to bet money that this is what parents think when they do things like that. Well, mine at least. ;)
rampant

09-02-06, 06:30 PM		Placement Exams

In a crowd of youngsters

Tirmek - There you are!

Sarah - What now?

Tirmek - what what?

Elina - Hello

Ken'baroque - Ok you will be paired off with one another and duel each other in a random field under the supervision of teachers from the disciplines your studying. Each of you take a rock from the pot the rock corresponds to an arena, there are two of each.

Sarah - green

Tirmek - green

Ken'baroque - head up to that forested pot there with the white flags.

Elina - light brown

Young Elf with lots of throwing weapons. - Light brown

Ken'Baroque - over there *shakes pot*
Kaizer_Ryu

09-02-06, 06:50 PM		OOC: Oh, great. Tirmek vs. Sarah. This should be good. I can't wait to find out about Elina's opponent.

On another note, SilvercatMoonpaw mentioned this a little while back, and I figured it'd be something interesting to do.

IC:

Lisa: Say, Terra. There's something I wanted to mention to you.

Terra: Shoot.

Lisa: Well, it stems from an off-hand comment NJ26 said to Weylin a little while ago. We were talking about it, and the idea struck me as something we might need in the near future.

Terra: What is it?

Lisa: Shapeshifting clothing.

Terra: *intrigued* Huh. That most definitely could be useful.

Lisa: With the unbinding of the fourth seal, Sarah's been showing more and more signs that she's a full-blooded Werewolf.

Terra: Yeah. The tail was a surprise.

Lisa: I was just thinking that, if we could commission someone to make that, it'd really help her and Weylin out.

Terra: It's at least worth a shot.

Ketler: I can help!

Lisa: Not if you were the last Artificer on Eberron.

Ketler: :weep:

OOC: For the newbies, Ketler has a bit of an obsession with *ahem* younger women. Specifically Jaela. Thus the reason for Lisa's comment.
rampant

09-02-06, 07:19 PM		At a bare pit in the earth.

Elina - Hi, my name is Elina

Elf kid - I am Tellowa, you seemed to know Tirmek pretty well.

Elina - Not really we just met him recently.

Tellowa - He's a prick isn't he.

Elina - Not so much mean as just...Arrogant.

Tellowa - And how, once he had the gall to challenge my elder sibling to a fight.

Elina - Who won?

Tellowa - My sibling has been here a decade, he would never accept the dishonor of such a match.

Elina - oh, anyway do we wait for a teacher?

Tolos - I'm here

Ken'Baroque - As am I proceed

Tellowa - a blade weaver huh?

Elina - I have an aunt whose a breaker.

Tolos - BEGIN!MAGGOTS!

Tellowa disapears.

Elina - NIce try *gust of wind*

As the wind kicks up dust one spot remains unafected.

Elina - HU-HAh

Elina swings the Staff across going for a smashing blow to the side.

Two shuriken fash into existance, one striking the end of the staff to send the strike wide, the other scratches across elina's hand.

Tellowa - *reappears* Nice try
----------------------

Tirmek - Wide area, plenty of cover, you should have an edge here.

Sarah - Shut up and fight.

Sivic - Aye get on with it you two

Forbes - Don't rush someone else's fights.
warforged_assasin

09-02-06, 07:28 PM		hey who's elinas's and sarah's father(s)
if he isnt known i call dibs
Kaizer_Ryu

09-02-06, 07:37 PM		hey who's elinas's and sarah's father(s)
if he isnt known i call dibs
It's really obvious if you pay attention. Terra is Elina's Mother and Lisa is her "Father". The opposite is true for Sarah. :pbbbtt:

As I've said before, I'm not explaining how that works. Just accept it as involving lots of magic and leave it at that.
warforged_assasin

09-02-06, 07:56 PM		damm i would have had fun with the concept but i'll do ti any way:P

Alkran Balfro
male wood elf Beowulf monk(planar)5/elemental savant10

A member of a secret clan of wood elves there purpose was to combine three were-templates a were-tiger/wolf/bear is now called a beowulf (it's posed to be spelled that way) he meet lisa and terra in the beastlands while they were on their honeymoon they got drunk and you all can guess what happened then well while on his travels he stumleled on the FF on accident and saw lisa and terra and noticed they had kids he hopes he isn't the father. but he accepts the idea for now ( he got there during the vampire hunter rose time)
urial angel of death

09-02-06, 07:57 PM		Volrath: I know how it works. I do I do! *jumps up and down*

Lisa: Fine what do you think?

Volrath: *whisper*

Lisa: *smashes Volrath's head in* No you disgusting little freak!

Volrath: *head reforms* Oh come on with Terra's tentacle vines and-

Vicious beating ensues.
urial angel of death

09-02-06, 08:00 PM		OOC: Warforged assassin Terra can't get drunk because druids of a certain level are immune to poisons and no matter how you argue it in DnD alcohol is a poison. Also Terra got pregent before they left the island, the first place they went to. Lisa get pregent shortly after.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-02-06, 08:00 PM		damm i would have had fun with the concept but i'll do ti any way
Ass.

As should be obvious, please ignore warforged assasin's complete disregard for character ownership and storyline.

For those of you who actually bother to pay attention to what my characters would and would not do, I updated their Wiki entries.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-02-06, 09:06 PM		:censored:
OOcat: He's just suggesting that Balfro got drunk, thinks it was with Lisa and Terra, and worries that he might be the father of their kids. So, mess with his head. :devil:

Silver: Seriously, have some fun with it. I made Krozen a half-were.

OOcat: But that happened in such a way that OOKaizer could decide for himself how and whether that affected his characters. The other E.B.N.E.s need to figure out how to interpret things a bit more creatively.

Bunny: Like with me and turning pink.

Caralot: And I have no problem being in love with Kanatash.

Employees of Erk's Place: And we're all hyjacked because we weren't in use.

OOC: That's another thing, warforged_assasin: find out which characters aren't in use right now, and steal them. No one'll care.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-02-06, 09:38 PM		OOC: I'm just a little tired of having my characters used in ways that would never happen in any way, shape or form, especially in a crude attempt at juvenile humor. Especially when my characters are the single most defined ones in the entire thread. I find what warforged_assassin did in extremely poor taste.

OK, end rant.
Charles Phipps

09-02-06, 09:49 PM		OOC: Kaiser, I know that you get extremely upset with that. You're also somewhat welcome to. Think of it as the price of fame. Everyone wants a piece of your characters. Even I'm guilty of it honestly.

Rose: I for one think that you need to be replaced as Gamemaster.

This is a round robin, I'm not even....GAHHHHHH!

Rose: As your new Gamemaster, I am now making it clear this rule.

Any attempt to use another character for a plot should be approved via private message unless it's pretty clear that you're okay with it from the start.

For example, so long as Rose is being kept in funny character then I give him free use and reign to be abused or the start of plotlines.

Also, as a personal note, please respect that Kaiser-Ryu has gone to a lot of trouble to make Lisa and Terra have their own story arc and he's very protective of them. Any plotlines you may have planned with those two are essentially things you should probably drop outright. Kaiser has his own stories he wants to tell and he's being kind enough to share them with us.

The same right applies to you.

OOCharles: MMMPH MMMM! MPHHHHH!

Rose: I'll let you out later.

Michael: Hey, to show previous failed plotlines. My romance with Lisa was replaced.

Linda: I'm still out there...somewhere.
rampant

09-02-06, 10:12 PM		Tirmek - :rolleyes: fine *Incarnate Warhammer*

Smash

Sarah - *dodge* :eek: This calls for a change in stategy, *yoink*

Tirmek - *pursuit*

a little wandering later

Tirmek - (breathes deeply through his nose) There you are

Sarah - HOW?!

Twang and a miss

Tirmek - OH did i startle you?

Sarah - *yoink*

Tirmek - Not this time *call kukri*

Tirmek somersaults over Sarah and back in front.
Sarah attempts a lunge with her short sword.
Tirmek parries with the axe and brings the kukri around in a stab the glances off a stud in sarah's armor.
Sarah rolls past slicing with her blade along the way, the blow slips by Tirmek's defenses and,... does nothing to his Rakshasa hide.
Sarah dashes off into the underbrush once more.
--------------------------

OOC: She can hurt him, but it has to be a solid hit. Half-Rakshasa have a High NA boost.
--------------------------

Elina - Crud a ninja

Tellowa - (ardent 4 energy, darkness, & conflict mantles/ Ninja 1) *Bolt of cold*

ELina - PYSCHIC NINJA:gah: :gah: OOF!
------------------
OOC: You want a go kaizer or what?
urial angel of death

09-02-06, 10:43 PM		Sarah: I just need more time and a flat surface.

Comes across a calm pool of water.

Sarah: Bingo!

Searches around in backpack and produces a vial of blue liquid. Tirmek bursts from the undergrowth and lunges at her. Sarah whip around with her shortsword. The cut is shallow, but enough to draw blood. She then dips the sword into the pool. Tirmek lunges again. This time Sarah jumps out of the way and he lands in the pool. Sarah then pour the vial into the pool, instantly freezing it. Tirmek tries to rip out of the ice, but is unable to.

Tirmek: What the? Ice should give way easy.

Sarah: Its not the ice keeping you there. You are part outsider and therefore can be bound by certain substances. One of those being your own blood.

Tirmek: My blood alone could do that or else I'd freeze every time I bled.

Sarah: They must be arranged in a pattern the most common being pentagram and hexagram. Ice's base components are perfect polyhydrons with all sides shaped like hexgons. Your blood is in those molecules making millions of perfect little hexagrams to bind you. :P

Tirmek: Little prick.

OOC: Kaizer if you don't like this ignore it.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-02-06, 10:44 PM		OOC: I do appreciate that, Charles. But I don't want to lock my characters out from use by other people, either. I don't mind them being used as, say, a sounding board for another poster's characters. Asking questions to get to a certain point they're trying to make and such. The thing I do have a problem with is when they are used in such a way that it would change or go against the basic nature of their character in some significant way.

For example, Sir Elton. Though, as I said, it would have been interesting had it been in character, it simply was nothing like them. The simple description of Terra in tight pants and a halter top was so egregiously out of character as to be unbelieveable. She wouldn't have been threatened by him in the least or have gone in for that duel in the first place. Also, Lisa is not the type to simply give herself over to the Quori, or anyone else for that matter.

All I ask is to see at least a concerted effort to keep them in the characters that have been forged over the course of this and the previous thread. That is all I can expect, since only I really know what they would do in any given situation. If you're new and don't get the character yet, use one of the lesser used or unclaimed crew as SilvercatMoonpaw suggested.

Elina and Sarah are more open to interpretation than Terra and Lisa. They're just kids. What I put in their description is pretty much all there is. In fact, I've really enjoyed many of the ways they've been used in this thread so far.

Terra: I'm not about to get drunk off anything less than Hellbrew.

Lisa: And there's no way we'd even consider doing so around complete strangers.

Sarah: Making me Momma's wife is icky, too!

Elina: At least it hasn't happened to me so far...

Sorry for going off like that. But, for lack of a better description, these girls are my babies. I've watched them grow both in the thread and in my head as the story progresses. It just bugs me to see them used seemingly without regard for their past actions or personality.

I'm just gonna wrap this up by saying, if you really want to do something that involves my characters significantly, feel free to drop me a PM. I'm more than happy to help in the creation of another story arc. I enjoy this thread, and I really don't want to turn into "that guy".

-------------

OOC: You want a go kaizer or what?
You can take it for now. I'm enjoying it so far (especially the psychic ninja comment. lol). I'm at a loss for ideas myself. That's the major problem with being overly defensive. Saps the funny out of me after a while.

Maybe some ice cream will help. :)
rampant

09-02-06, 11:27 PM		OOC: Ice cream always helps, especialy bearclaw.
---------------------------------------

Tirmek - how dare you

Sarah - Huh?

Tirmek - HOW DARE YOU USE HIS BLOOD AGAINST ME:weep: I'M ONLY HALF, HALF OF THAT MONSTER

Tirmek is shaking with rage and loathing.

Tirmek - *bolt of fire*

Tirmek is free

Tirmek - Thats the problem with rituals, while they don't require as much training as other types of magic, they tend to be highy disruptable. Now I would advise you to run.

Sarah - Why Should I?:P

SMASH

Tirmek - Thats why

Sarah (about 6 ft from previous position and prone) - This armor really isn't built to take hammers.
---------------------

OOC: Tirmek has issues with his father.
----------------------

Elina - Ok this could be a problem

Tellowa - No hard feelings right

two hatchets are whirling for Elina
-----------------

OOC: Doing these on my own is getting dull, screw with it already,...btw thanks to urial for doing just that.

Also does Elina have a name for her fox spirit guide?
Kaizer_Ryu

09-03-06, 12:22 AM		OOC: I haven't decided on a name for it yet. I'll get to it later, though. I'm out of time. I'll be able to chip in early tomorrow, but otherwise, I'm out of luck.

And I just had a good idea too. :(
Crystalforged

09-03-06, 01:39 AM		OOC: I haven't decided on a name for it yet. I'll get to it later, though. I'm out of time. I'll be able to chip in early tomorrow, but otherwise, I'm out of luck.
Foxxy Love? ;) :P
cypher_zero

09-03-06, 01:42 AM		Foxxy Love? ;) :P
Oh dear lord no. Please... for the sake of the little strand of sanity I still cling to, no.
.
rampant

09-03-06, 01:52 AM		OORampant - Pearl 1 knit 2 pearl 1 knit 2

OOPhipps - Do I even need to bother asking where that came from
Crystalforged

09-03-06, 01:53 AM		Oh dear lord no. Please... for the sake of the little strand of sanity I still cling to, no.
.
Well that seems like a good reason to do it to me.:P

:evillaugh ALL YOUR SANITY ARE BELONG TO US!!!1!1! :evillaugh
Gladius_Lucix

09-03-06, 02:21 AM		Liam walks up to Terra and Lisa when they aren't busy.

Liam: Could I ask you two something?

Terra: Sure. What do you need?

Liam: It's more if there's anything your daughters need. I figure I'm about 9 years behind on birthday presents, and I was wondering if there was anything they liked or needed.

Lisa: Well, there's not really anything that they need. They already have their school supplies. It seems that Sarah is going to be a full werewolf, so we were thinking of some clothes that won't shred when she changes.

Liam: No kid likes getting clothes for their birthday, though. What kind of toys do they like?

Lisa: You know, they never really played with toys. It was more stuff like "Tag" and "Hide and Seek."

Liam: Ah. Well, I have an idea that could be interesting. I'll try to get something working for the clothing problem, too.

Terra: Thanks for the thought, Liam. I'm sure they'll enjoy whatever you come up with.

Liam: You're welcome. I'll get back to you when I've made some progress.
Paulon

09-03-06, 02:27 AM		Oh dear lord no. Please... for the sake of the little strand of sanity I still cling to, no.

Sanity? Here? Kanatash isn't doing his job properly. Even the onlookers are probably insane by now, nevermind the participants like you. :-P
Charles Phipps

09-03-06, 02:41 AM		Rose: In any case, I've now managed to stake the entire Karrnath Royal Family.

Frances: You know some of those weren't vampires right?

Rose: Err....of course BUT THEY COULD HAVE BEEN.

Frances: Well, in any case, the Treasure is behind this door.

Rose: FINALLY. Damnit, I was so worried that this wouldn't have a payoff!

*opens door*

Zella: Oh thank goodness my prince, you've at last come for me!

Rose: Yeah yeah, so where's the treasure!

*starts to unlock Zella's chains*

Frances: Right there, written on the wall.

Rose: *reads plaque on wall* The greatest treasure is....LOVE!?

Frances: Hahahahahahahah! Sorry lad, I was just kidding! This isn't where my treasure is stored at all.

Rose: Zella, cast Ethereal Shift on me.

Zella: Why?

Rose: Because I am going to KICK HIS ASS. *gets whip of undead slaying*

Frances: AH!
rampant

09-03-06, 02:42 AM		Serene - I never thought of that!

Lisa - What?

Serene - Birthdays and Dol Dornmas's

Terra - Calm Down, I mean seriously Satnak is putting them through school.

Lisa - Good thing too, I've seen the tuition fees.

Terra - I wonder if she has a plan for getting Marish's kit(s) through.

Lisa - I don't think even Satnak could work that much overtime.

Terra - I just hope she keeps enough back for her own children.

Serene - Ummm

Lisa - NO way!

Serene - no we haven't even, well...

Terra - Impossible, not even once.

Serene - She keeps pulling back, if we get too frisky. She's been really nervous since we heard from Ketty about the whole married thing. At the same time she lets us get more intimate before she stops.

Lisa - Now that I think about it,... I'm not surprised.

Terra - Please explain it to me.

Lisa - Satnak gets really uptight about matters of her heart. Look at thefiasco with LEvy.

Serene - Rather not:mad: .

Lisa - regardless:rolleyes: she probably wanted to wait until at least a proposal, but then she got blindsided, on the one hand the main thing holding her back is gone at least to her, while on the other the two of you never got a chance to figure out were you stood on this issue.

------------------------

Serene - And thats what they said. This whole situation is messed up.

Terrek - ...
-------------------

OOC: Cypher?
cypher_zero

09-03-06, 02:52 AM		OOC: Crap. I was just about to got to bed too. D*mn you rampant for making me stay up and contribute to the plot! D*mn you I say! :P

IC:

Terrek: Hmm... Well it seems to me that Satnak doesn't want to do anything unless she's certain that this is how you both want it. You haven't mentioned the two of you talking about marriage before, at least not much, so to her it probably still seems like something she's been forced into. While she may love you, she still doesn't want someone else to tell her who she's married to. The two of you need to sit down and discuss how you really feel about it. I'm certain you both wanted to be married, ultimately, but this way it seems sort of rushed, like you had no say in the matter. If you both do feel that you did wish to be married and that you love each other, then express that to each other. Also, I would recommend holding a ceremony; a traditional wedding, even if it's only a formality. It'll make being married alll that much more 'real' to the both of you.
.
Gladius_Lucix

09-03-06, 02:59 AM		OOC: If they go quickly, they can have a joint ceremony with Kanatash and Caralot! ;) :P
Cypher Brand (tm) Orange Text of DOOM!
rwarner3701

09-03-06, 03:22 AM		OOC: darn you and your non-SRD characters making me find books

Still on the ground unable to dodge the hatchets Elina thinks quickly to protect herself.

Elina: *Create Water*

Roughly six gallons of water appear in the path of the hatchets slowing them down enough for gravity to take its course bringing them to the ground with a satisfying splash. Understandably confused Tellowa pauses for a moment allowing Elina to get back to her feet.

Tellowa: Clever, but lets see how you handle this. *Crystal Shard*

Unable to move fast enough the shard pierces Elina's armor at the shoulder and blood can be seen starting to soak into if from underneath.

Elina: I can't take much more of this. *Obscuring Mist*

Tellowa: Tricky but who do you think stands a better chance the ninja or the druid?

Tellowa hears faint chanting from the left as Elina begins to cast another spell. Slowly Tellowa moves towards the noise but doesn't get close enough before it stops. Continuing foward Tellowa finally gets a response to the question.

Elina: I'm sure its more a matter of intellegence than skill Tellowa. Make as much noise as you can.

Lashing out towards her voice with a kinfe, Tellowa is able to land a minor blow but still enough to draw blood. Elina stifles a cry of pain placing her hand over the wound. Tellowa hears more movement as something runs off to the right. Chasing after her, and drawing four Shiruken to throw, Tellowa hopes that some will hit the target still obscured by the mist.

The figure is hit and stumbles to the ground. Moving up to investigate Tellowa crouches to see through the mist but can only find some disturbed dirt where something fell. Then there is a noise, more chanting from Elina coming form the opposite direction.

Elina: *Creeping Cold* See it is easier to follow someone when they aren't trying to hide.

Tellowa begins to shiver as the sweat worked up during the fight starts to freeze, cringing in pain as every nerve tries to warn of the danger. However, Tellowa is able to retaliate lunging towards Elina with a knife which she just barely manages to parry. They trade blows a few more times before the pain becomes to much and Tellowa collapses to the ground.

Tellowa: H-h-how?

Elina: (allowing the fog to disapate) The increadable pain you are feeling is your sweat freezing while still inside your body. As for the noise, I was really giving instructions to my wood wose although you seemed to follow them rather well.
Crystalforged

09-03-06, 04:00 AM		Volrath approaches Kanatash carrying a rather large tome.

Volrath: Uncle, I was thinking... I had really been hoping to preform Terra's wedding in the church of Ted but she said no so I was thinking that maybe I could preform the ceremony for your wedding.

Kanatash: (looks strangely embaressed) Erm, well...

Volrath: :bigeyes:

Kanatash: (sigh) Look, if it was any other diety of madness and sick perversions I'd be all for it but...

Volrath: But why?

Kanatash: Lets just say there's some... bad blood... between me and Ted. Part of it comes from the fact that I do his job better than he does. Mainly it over what I like to call "the Mialee Incident."

Volrath: "The Mialee Incident?" You don't mean that- YOU were the one responsible for the creation of- :shocked:

Kanatash: Yes, yes. Some of my best work ever I might add. Anyhow, if you can find anything else out of the Mythos of the Great Old Ones I should be game. I should go now, lots of other things to prepare for.



OOC: For more on the Church of Ted look here (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?p=8158366).
warforged_assasin

09-03-06, 06:04 AM		OOC: I'm just a little tired of having my characters used in ways that would never happen in any way, shape or form, especially in a crude attempt at juvenile humor. Especially when my characters are the single most defined ones in the entire thread. I find what warforged_assassin did in extremely poor taste.

OK, end rant.
and people say im rude but i apoligize i didnt know u were touchy on that matter but you guys didnt say lisa got pregnant on the island and you never know but im just stating the posibilites
warforged_assasin

09-03-06, 06:14 AM		But for the hell of it why not use him for some other reson hmmmmm i'll put my personalites togeter to think
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-03-06, 07:53 AM		OOcat: Like I said, make him think that he might be the the father of Terra and Lisa's kids, then blow his mind out when he finds out the truth. Or does he come into the picture too late?

Silver: I think by the Beastlands they were already visibly pregnant.

OOcat: Dmn.

13: At least you're not overprotective of us.

OOcat: *yawn* You're mainly sounding boards…you're here to provide insight into the comic workings :zzz:

Bunny: Oh :censored:! I hate it when this happens.

Silver: You can still comment on the battles.

Bunny: Since when have those been of any interest—
Tirmek - HOW DARE YOU USE HIS BLOOD AGAINST ME! :weep: I'M ONLY HALF, HALF OF THAT MONSTER!

Tirmek is shaking with rage and loathing.
Bunny: :mymy: Dude's got some serious issues.

Silver: Nothing wrong with being half-Rakshasa. Your blood shouldn't make you who you are.

13: Tirmek isn't listed in the Wiki, can't remember what the circumstances of his conception are. Might be he's picking up unconcious redirected hatred from his mother. That's a problem with being psychic.

Bunny: Well since when is the mind so powerful? Trust me, I "meet" them about as much as everyone else. "But it was mind over matter…" "Yeah, your mind is all over that huge piece of solid matter."

Silver: Oh, I don't know—

Bunny: Let me guess, it involves "telekinesis".
Kaizer_Ryu

09-03-06, 10:20 AM		OOC: Sorry if I don't play Tirmek as intelligently as I can, but I either don't have the books with Warblade and Erudite, or I'm overlooking it. I'm thinking the former. I'll just go with what I've seen.

Just FYI, rampant, Terra is extraordinarily wealthy. Even thought she's leaving the Underground. Tuition fees aren't really a problem. Unless...ooooooooo...that could be a good tangent...

Dun dun duuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnn... ;)

IC:

Sarah rolls to the side just as Tirmek comes down with another smash of the hammer. As she rights herself, Tirmek takes a side strike, trying to knock her down again. With a speed and grace that surprises even her, Sarah flips over the strike, catching Tirmek completely open. The wound to his arm, though tempered by his Half-Rakshasa hide, bleeds at a rather good pace. Sarah retreats to the trees, disappearing into the foilage.

Tirmek: Not bad. I was unaware you could go that fast in such heavy armor.

No response.

Tirmek: We tried this before, remember? I can track you by scent.

With a deep breath, he catches her trail. Climbing into the trees, he follows a winding path throught the canopy. The sweat she left made it easier to track, but he seemed no closer. He picked up sounds from time to time, but not enough to locate her. Then he realizes his true position.

Tirmek: (i.h.h.) Heh. I walked into this.

She was good. Acting the prey in order to become the hunter. She could see him, smell him, and probably hear him. Her scent was all around. She had purposely left more traces in order to dull his senses.

*twang*

The arrow pierces his armor, but does little. He dared not leave the trees and give her the high ground, so he followed the path of the arrow through the branches. Her scent was stronger here, but she was gone.

*twang*

Another arrow strikes, to much the same effect as the first one. This process repeats a few more times, till he began to discern a pattern. She was leading him. Calling a handaxe, he followed her and waited for the next strike. When he heard the whistle of the arrow, he immediately retaliated. Though he missed him mark, it was enough to startle her out of the trees. The surprised gasp and crack of branches announced her presence. Dropping to the ground, he found Sarah picking herself up.

Sarah: I had hoped to keep you going a bit longer, but, oh well. Should be kicking in about now.

It was at this time he noticed something odd. An itching sensation at the first arrow point. She hadn't intended to hurt him!

Sarah: When your mom's a Druid, the forest is your weapon. :D

The itching starts to spread from the second arrow.

Tirmek: *itch* Damn you. *itch*

OOC: Meh, I thought it was funny.
urial angel of death

09-03-06, 10:50 AM		Sarah: I see we have some daddy issues.

Tirmek: Shut up!

Sarah: Having the blood of a monster isn't so bad. Observe...

Sarah's body begins to change. Her fingernails lengthen into wicked claws, her mouth extends to become a muzzle, her muscles increase several times in size, and white fur sprouts all over her body.

Sarah: Now for some fun!

OOC: She had been making controled change check the entire battle.
rampant

09-03-06, 11:56 AM		OOC: Sealed Urial
---------------------

Tirmek - Nice *itch* try, Volrath give you a potion?

Sarah - HUh? (i.h.h. how did he know?)

Tirmek - Your sealed, I'm a sage in training I can see them.

Sarah - *anime sweat drop*

Tirmek - DID YOU HONESTLY THINK YOU COULD DECIEVE ME!!

Sarah - *Twang*

Tirmek - *parry* *stab*

Sarah - *geh* *slash*

Tirmek - *clang*

Sarah - (i.h.h. he's used a martial strike to increase his damage resistance, I'm in deep now)

Tirmek - huuhuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhuuhuuuuuuuuuu uuu (calm down you aren't a 'zerk getting angry hurts you)
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-03-06, 12:19 PM		Silver: Werewolves aren't really monsters.

OOcat: Must…resist…urge…to…hyjack—GAH!

Bunny: Didn't work the first time. Even if it was a joke.

Silver: By the way, why do werewolves have claws? I don't think the nails of a wolf are all that great, even if they don't get worn down.

Bunny: :bored: Same reason every single creature has mega-natural armor.

13: Itching was a nice touch.

Bunny: Wouldn't that count as a poison?

Silver: (checks MM) Rakshasas aren't immune to poison. I don't know what book Tirmek uses, but my guess is it doesn't add anything.

OOcat: Ever notice how OOcat doesn't do anything with Erk's Place and Caralot anymore?

13: :eek: 3rd person! This is a Level 3 alert! Quick, dig up an old idea!

Silver: :thinks: :lightbulb
*******
The three Jaelas are sitting together at a table in Erk's Place. The crowd today is really weird. But the three Jaelas are certainly blending in.

NJ26: :embarrass Did you two have to wear those?

Sakura Jaela: Wearing what?

NJ26: (face slap) Those costumes. Please don't tell me you've been effected by this insanity.

Lucky is dressed up in her Gender Bender outfit. Mr. T has a mowhawk and is wearing lots of gold chains. Saberiel has a cape, black on the outside, red on the inside, a black mask that curves up into huge horns, as well as an outfit that is so obviously revealing that it's boring. A great multitude of the patrons are costumed, including a whole table of Alt-Jarlots.

NJ26: Every employee except me has gone super-crazy! You don't want to even know what that bottomless dancer is.

Jaela Jarlot: It's not even like they're real superheroes.

NJ26: (sarcastic) Like you? :ahem:

Jaela Jarlot is wearing a new super-outfit, a techno-like black suit studded with glass lenses.

JJ: You know, I was actually a costumed vigilante once.

Sakura Jaela: I'm a magical girl. Can I help it if the job comes with a silly outfit?

NJ26: You know what? Fine. At least I seem to be immune.

Just then Weylin comes in. He recently got a job as a bouncer, and because he's a werewolf his coolness factor seems to be protecing him from needing a costume.

NJ26: And then there's Weylin. But he's not much of a conversationalist.

JJ: Y'know, he's pretty good looking for a son of Cardinal Crazen. What do you think Sakurrrrrrrrr……

SJ: :love:

OOcat: It's not like Jaela's gotten much use recently.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-03-06, 12:46 PM		OOC: Yeah, I didn't want to say anything, but her full transformation is sealed at this time. Things like the tail are just parts of it that are bleeding through the broken parts.

I'm not sure if Half-Naztharune Rakshasa are listed anywhere, so I'm just going to assume they have similar damage reduction to full blooded ones (i.e. ?/good and piercing).

BTW, lol on the Jaela/Weylin thing. What is it with us and Lycanthrope/Silver Flame relationships? :D

IC:

Sarah: *clang* (i.h.h.) He's really mad. Gotta bypass the damage reduction. I hate to use his heritage against him again, but he's using it as an advantage.

Instead of going for Tirmek directly, Sarah changes her strategy. Catching the handle of his hammer, she punches on one of the arrows still lodged in his armor. He stifles a cry of surprise and pain, swiping at her with his free hand. She dodges his blow, but he breaks out of her grip.

Tirmek: *clutching his chest* Cheap shot.

Sarah: You should see how Aunt Satnak fights. You say you loathe your heritage, but you use it all the same when it suits your purpose.

Tirmek: SHUT UP!

He launches another Bolt of Flame catching her head on. The flames do little but singe her clothes. (OOC: Half-Fiend resistance to fire)

Sarah: Your heritage is both a strength and a weakness. I have tasted only a little of what my parents gave me, and it frightens me. But I accept it all the same.

Sarah comes at him again. For a split second, it appears as if his vision blurs. He discovers the illusion only halfway through the swing. The before image takes the hit and dissipates without a sound as her real self jams two more arrows into him and hops away.

Sarah: The power I possess will not come to me all at once. That would defeat the purpose of sealing it so that I become accustomed to it.

Tirmek: (i.h.h.) Oh, great. Not only the lycanthropy bleeds through, but the shadow abilities as well? It's not even close to an offensive weapon, but she can make illusions at least.

OOC: Think of it as the difference between a confligration (Terra) and a match (her daughters). The seals function to let it out slowly, not bind it completely till they all fade. She can't do much more than tricks of light, but it adds a whole dimension of "oh crap" when she can do it almost at will.
rampant

09-03-06, 01:10 PM		OOC: Actually its the same as a 1/2-half rakshasa al dragon 313, piercing or magic, well adamant now that he used bones of stone strike from his warblade abilities.
-----------------------

Tirmek - One cheap shot is a compliment, and two your attributing my sudden rise in toughness to the ressilience of my father's people, actually its from 5 years of pushing my body to the limit and learning the sublime way wolfcub.

Sarah - huh?

Tirmek - *saphire nightmare strike*

Sarah - ugh no no, no more silver, please no more - huh?

Tirmek - *Force screen* itch huf huf huf

Sarah - hef hef hef

-------------------------

Elina - (i.h.h. Not good not good not good)

Elina is holding her own barely, Tellowas is keeping her pinned down with a seemingly endless supply of shuriken.
------------------------

OOC: I kind of need the name of the Spirit guide for the next bit on Elina vs Tellowas unless someone else wants a go. Feel free to go for a victory, all of them are already in the teachers just need to see what they can do in a fight.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-03-06, 01:42 PM		What is it with us and Lycanthrope/Silver Flame relationships? :D
13: The Silver Flame hates—

OOC: *POWER BLAST!*

13: (charred, coughs up smoke) Okay, I'm stopping.

OOC: The Silver Flame doesn't like lycanthropes, tried to purge them once, would still like to kill them. Since this is the Forgotten Freedom, where everything is turned upsidedowninsideoutsideways, we don't just want to heal the rift, we want the two landmasses to slam together! :D
rampant

09-03-06, 01:43 PM		OOC: I thought it was just because we love to tweak the fanatics.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-03-06, 01:57 PM		OOC: That too. But it doesn't mean we don't want the relationships to be real. Besides, most of the time the lyacnthrope/silver flame angle isn't all that well known (Krozen hides his, I don't know if Lisa's said anything, I highly doubt any of the Silver Flame people are giving a rat's ass about what Jaela is doing these days).

Purist Silver Arrow Frothing Fanatic Standing in Front of a Very Large Crowd: WE MUST RESCUE OUR BELOVED PONTIFF FROM THE VERY HEART OF EVIL AND WRONGNESS!!!!!

OOC: :bored: On the other hand…
Kaizer_Ryu

09-03-06, 02:09 PM		OOC: At first, just to be mean, I thought about Shippo. But that was too mean (Besides, she'd kill me. Dying by the hand of a 9 year old fictional character would be a little embarrasing. :D ). So I picked Kitsune.

BTW, I don't get Dragon Magazine (shame on me, I know. I will eventually).

IC:

Under the hail of shurikens, Elina pulls a cantrip.

*Flare*

Tellowa: Gah!

In his moment of distraction, she closes the distance and sends him sprawling with a blow from her staff. He manages to right himself, only to get hit face first with a Sandblast spell. Stunned, he is hit hard yet again. Slower on the recovery this time, he gets to his feet. He sees Elina chanting a few feet away with her hands on the ground.

*Entangle*

Before he can react, tree roots burst from the ground, snaring him in their grasp.

Tellowa: Son of a-!

*twang*

As he attempts to escape, Elina begins pelting him with arrows.

--------

Sarah: Seems *huff* we both have *huff* something to prove.

Tirmek: *itch* *huff* Indeed. *itch*
urial angel of death

09-03-06, 04:00 PM		Sarah: Have you noticed the slowing of your reflexes and the quickening of your breath.

Tirmek: So I'm in a fight and getting tired.

Sarah: We've barely been fighting for more than ten minutes. I thought you had been training for years. You should be able last much longer without getting tired.

Tirmek: Well it is a little wierd but you're a strong opponent.

Sarah: *Said in a british accent.* No I'm a clever opponent. When you broke through the pond you breathed in little particles of ice. You body was unable to melt them because they were made from alchemist's frost. They've got into your blood and are being carried to every part of you body. Soon the hexagrams will completely stop you. Victory is mine!

Tirmek: Then I just have to finish quickly. *attack*

Sarah: *narrowly dodges* Blast!
Lord Kale Fangblade

09-03-06, 04:21 PM		The Creature crouched down, he wore the darkness around him like a cloak. a familiar scent hit the air. Vampire. it moved into a low crouch and began to track. it has spent many days memroising the labrinths beneath this place, it had slaughtered all that stood in its way. The blood red mist clinged to its vision, it longed for more. the slaughter.

It unseathed its claws, their serrated edges dripping with venom. Its muscels tensed. the scent was closer now, so very close. through the darkness it could see its attacker, hunched down nursing a wound. It Smiled. easy pickings. It leaped with a sudden burst of strength sent him into a lunge, he swung his claw in an upward arc. there was a soft crunch as it sheared the attacker in two. It threw back its head in a bestial roar.

And right then it felt an armoured elbow smash into its chest knocking the air from its lungs, The Attacker dived back. so, what it had killed had been an illusion. The Creature stood in a attack position snarling. The Attackers violet eyes locked with his, The Hatred in those eyes burned with the forcity of a thousand suns. The attacker lunged forwards with a pait of Kama shaped mind blades, The creature tensed.

And Lunged its claws scything through the air. In an instant time seemed to become like treacle, The Creature moving extremly slowly. but The Attacker Moving lightning fast despite its black full plate. Slashing at the weakspots of its armoured hide, a deadly uppercut lanced across its face blinding one eye.
The creature felt white hot pain all over its body from the steadily bleeding wounds.

The creature swung a thicklimb in a deadly body blow. the attacker ducked and brought a elbow into the creatures stomach, The Creature swayed slightly on its feet as the darkness began to close around its vision. It fell Back, and the last thing its saw was those violet eyes. the mercyless violet eyes.
***

The Creature was bound now, with magic and chains. It was almost nine feet tall. with huge rippling muscels and a large heavy built frame. Its black scaled hide was similar to the half-dragons but heavier, Its eyes where preditory slits and its claws where long and serrated. it tensed against the chains. its claws dripping with venom. Sa'vor watched it with intrest. Naz'roth, Tara and Slip stood a little further back, they'd heard about what it had done to Feal-Thas.

Naz'roth: What exactly, is it?

Sa'vor: *not looking away from the creature* It was a new form of Half-Dragon, since we're already in our second generation with the new borns that they've recently bore. i was wondering if we could get somekind of heavyier version.

Tara: and what exactly did you use to create it?

Sa'vor: I mixed Troll with the standard Half-dragon gene. this was one of the first batch, the rest are smart but not as smart as their smaller brothers. they're doing quite well, above expectations. and then... this one. its an anomili, its got a lot of fiend in it as well.

Naz'roth: how come you didnt tell us about them?

Sa'vor: It was merely a trail run. out of the first fifty this has been the only faliure. i wonder why?

Slip: Perhaps its a more feral version, maybe it didnt develop properly?

Sa'vor: Most likely. Im going to go into its mind.

Tara: Are you sure thats wise Sa'vor, Renember what it did to your son.

Sa'vor: *turning round* I know Tara, but we need to asscertain the reasons why it did this and see if we can pervent in from hapening again.

Sa'vor turned back round and strode towards the creature before anyone else could speak. he placed a mailed hand on its head, the creature stopped struggling. Sa'vor shuddered and removed his hand, he staggered slightly as he moved away.

Slip: whats wrong, What did you see ?

Sa'vor: *slightly shaken* Nothing, there was nothing. just a void. it was empty.... just a shell.
rampant

09-03-06, 04:56 PM		OOC: btw way they've actually been at it for an hour or two now. Yes tellowas carries that many shuriken, repeat after me bag of holding.
---------------------

Elina - (i.h.h. i got lucky with that hit, he's tougher and can more than match me spell to power, I need to catch him off gaurd,...he thinks I'm a druid, I can use that)
--------------------

Tirmek - *whirl*slam*slash*kick*

Sarah - *back-up*dodge*parry*oof*

Sarah manages to divest Tirmek of his kukri.
Tirmek responds by grabbing her armored shoulder and sending a pulse of electricity through her.

Tirmek - Or possibly your easy to fool.
---------------------------------

Elina - (i.h.h. ok kitsune a little hand here)

Tellowas - *Sonic push*
Crystalforged

09-03-06, 06:30 PM		Kanatash is back on the Forgotten Freedom, in the armory specifically. He is gathering the most deadly and dangerous weapons he can find and shoveling them all into several bags of holding. Already he wears a full suit of plate armor covered with long spikes and tower shield. Daggers, swords, axes, wands, and Dorjes have been strapped to every concieveable corner of his body not to mention that thanks to a raid on Kelter's Mi-Go weapons vault he's packing more heat than your average postal worker. He is in the process of shoving a Sphere of Anihilation into a portable hole as Volrath enters.

Volrath: Um, Uncle, what are you doing?

Kanatash: (with a hint of fear in his voice) I'm getting married, do you comprehend what that means?!

Volrath: You're not going to be able twist reality anymore without Caralot's go ahead?

Kanatash: I hadn't thought of that but no. It means that my family is coming!

Volrath: What's so bad about your family? I mean they weren't the ones who drove you insane, your trip to Xoriat did that.

Kanatash: The truth is I wasn't sane BECAUSE of my family, I was sane DESPITE my family.

Volrath: How bad can they be?

Kanatash: I'm terrified, that should tell you something.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-03-06, 08:21 PM		After the electrcity pulse.

Sarah: :D That tingled. *punch*

Tirmek: *oof* (i.h.h.) She's even more resistant to electricity than fire! Damn her impossible heritage.

The two lock hands, each trying to force the other to their knees. Sarah seems to have the advantage simply by hight.

Sarah: *strained* You're...quite strong.

Tirmek: *strained* I'm...impressed as well.

After a moment, Tirmek simply gives way, using Sarah's efforts against her and taking her with him.

Tirmek: Over you go. :devil:

Sarah: :eek: *toss* *SLAM*

Tirmek rights himself and turns as Sarah recovers. She gets up slowly, but begins laughing. She faces away from him, so he can't see her face. Though apparently a happy laugh, Tirmek gets the feeling the joke's on him.

Tirmek: What's so funny?

Sarah: Eh heh heh...

She turns slowly, revealing a fanged sneer. Her eyes are wild, fluctuating between their normal blue and blood red.

Sarah: :smirk: You're the first person other than my sister to challenge me and push me this far. If this happens often at this place, I'm gonna love it here. :devil:

Tirmek: (i.h.h.) What's up with her eyes? Could this be the Fiend half coming through? Or...the reason she want's to be a 'zerk!

Sarah: Ok, round six!

Her eyes go completely red as she yells/howls. With unnatural speed, she charges him. The look of almost malevolent joy on her face would have made a lesser being than Tirmek flee in terror.

Tirmek: :eek: HOLY HELL!

A swift blow to the face sends Tirmek flying through the trees. He manages to recover in mid air, only to see Sarah in hot pursuit. Quickly calling another axe, he barely has time to land before she strikes with her sword. Sparks fly from the force of the collision, and he is thrown off balance. With a shove, she knocks him into a tree. He dives to the side as she strikes again, barely missing him and leaving a good sized mark in the tree.

Tirmek: (i.h.h.) Totally different! She wouldn't just make a good 'zerk. She was freaking born one!

Trying to get in a better position before the next assault, Tirmek attempts to put some distance between them. A noise behind him alerts him to his pursuer. As she leaps for him, he rolls with the blow, falling back and putting his feet on her stomach. Using her own momentum, he flips her farther into the forest as she lands with a thud.

OOC: Ok, done for now. I can't seem to think of anything to do with Elina. :weep: Maybe later if it's still going on.
warforged_assasin

09-03-06, 08:34 PM		Kanatash is back on the Forgotten Freedom, in the armory specifically. He is gathering the most deadly and dangerous weapons he can find and shoveling them all into several bags of holding. Already he wears a full suit of plate armor covered with long spikes and tower shield. Daggers, swords, axes, wands, and Dorjes have been strapped to every concieveable corner of his body not to mention that thanks to a raid on Kelter's Mi-Go weapons vault he's packing more heat than your average postal worker. He is in the process of shoving a Sphere of Anihilation into a portable hole as Volrath enters.

Volrath: Um, Uncle, what are you doing?

Kanatash: (with a hint of fear in his voice) I'm getting married, do you comprehend what that means?!

Volrath: You're not going to be able twist reality anymore without Caralot's go ahead?

Kanatash: I hadn't thought of that but no. It means that my family is coming!

Volrath: What's so bad about your family? I mean they weren't the ones who drove you insane, your trip to Xoriat did that.

Kanatash: The truth is I wasn't sane BECAUSE of my family, I was sane DESPITE my family.

Volrath: How bad can they be?

Kanatash: I'm terrified, that should tell you something.


:heehee and i thought my famaliy was bad, they must be worse the daelkyr
warforged_assasin

09-03-06, 08:40 PM		OOcat: Like I said, make him think that he might be the the father of Terra and Lisa's kids, then blow his mind out when he finds out the truth. Or does he come into the picture too late?

Silver: I think by the Beastlands they were already visibly pregnant.

ever heard of Beastland fever ?
Kaizer_Ryu

09-03-06, 09:00 PM		OOC: This idea just came to me. I couldn't not do it. :D

IC:

Alkran Balfro: (i.h.h.) Ok, ok. Be cool. Maybe you're not. You just need to ask...

Walks up to Terra.

Alkran: Uh...hi. Remember me?

Terra: *raised eyebrow* Um...no...

Alkran: You know. From the Beastlands?

Terra: Never been there. I think you've got the wrong woman.

As she walks away, he tries to reconcile this turn of events with his admittedly hazy memory.

Alkran: :confused: Never?

At this time, a large mailbag floating about six inches off the ground walks up to him.

13: Alkran Balfro?

Alkran: Uh..yeah?

13: I got a letter here for you.

Alkran: Wow. Already?

Taking it, he notices the return address. Changeling Interdimensional Escort Service, Inc. The letter reads:

Dear Mr. Balfro, your payment for services rendered within the Beastlands has yet to be received. Please send the following amount by the end of the month: 38,000 GP. By ignoring this letter, we will be forced to collect on the agreed collateral: "My +3 Wang". Please note that we do not accept Credit Cards, Checks, or Money Orders.

Alkran: Uh-oh...
rampant

09-03-06, 09:16 PM		Tirmek - (i.h.h. so much for the seals protect me) *mindthrust*

Sarah - arrrrrrrr

Tirmek - (i.h.h. thats not gonna work twice) *sonic bolt*

Sarah - Grrrraaaaaarrrrr

Tirmek - I think I just made things worse:(

Sarah - You bet you did, that hurts. *charge*

Tirmek counters the charge by parrying with his axe, then once more somersaults over sarah. This time though she reacts with a nasty uppercut that pulls him to earth. As he falls he brings his booted foot down in her face.

The two slam the earth hard.
------------------------------------

Sivic - I ain't bringing that thing out, Levy gets the psychos remember.

Forbes - I haven't seen an entrance exam this brutal, since Satnak used a dagger to stab illis through the hands. Then sicced fluffy on him.
------------------------------------

Elina - AHHHHHHHH

A shuriken is buried in her hand, she drops her staff only to watch it dissapear as The again invisible tellowas picks it up.

Elina - Why did I get the psychic ninja?

Tellowas - Your just that unlucky (clonks Elina upside the head)

Elina - OUCH! That does it, Kitsune!

Tellowas - Huh?

Elina pulls the bloody shuriken from her hand and palms it. It begins to spin as she focuses her will upon it.

Tellowas - No more tricky spells from you.

Another pair of shuriken speed toward Elina, she manages to use the palmed shuriken to block one, but the other...Bounces off of an orange and white mindblade with the hilt shaped like a fox's grinning face.

Tellowas - Uh oh
-------------------

OOC: Yes Sarah vs. Tirmek is over.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-03-06, 09:46 PM		the return address. Changeling Interdimensional Escort Service, Inc. The letter reads:

Dear Mr. Balfro, your payment for services rendered within the Beastlands has yet to be received. Please send the following amount by the end of the month: 38,000 GP. By ignoring this letter, we will be forced to collect on the agreed collateral: "My +3 Wang". Please note that we do not accept Credit Cards, Checks, or Money Orders.
Bunny: So you're about to become 38,000 GP richer.

Silver: Nah, I'm hoping for the +3 Wang.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-03-06, 09:47 PM		OOC: Yes Sarah vs. Tirmek is over.
Silver: The battle maybe. :devil:
Kaizer_Ryu

09-03-06, 10:44 PM		Silver: The battle maybe. :devil:
OOKaizer: :rolleyes: They're nine and eight, respectively.

Silver: I don't mean that. Sheesh! Is that all you think about?

OOKaizer: I'm a guy. You should know the answer to that question.

Silver: Ok. I admit I walked into that. But it doesn't have to involve that kind of thing to be enjoyable. Watching a bunch of angsty kids with socially alienating family lines navigate puberty should be endlessly amusing. :devil:

OOKaizer: :D True. This should be fun no matter what happens.
Crystalforged

09-03-06, 10:45 PM		Rose: Kanatash, I know you're worried about your family showing up but aren't you off helping me save Zella right now? How can you be in two places at once?

Kanatash: Please, One, I've been tampering with space and time since before you were born. Two, this is the Forgotten Freedom stupid, the impossible is just in a day's work. Three, I'm a god**** entity stupid. I'm so good I've even got YOU existing in two places at once WITHOUT EVEN REALIZING IT.

Rose: What do you- :mymy: Uh, wow... I didn't even notice.

Kanatash: Like I said.

Rose: Well as long as I'm here, I was wondering, just who ARE your parents.

Kanatash: Truthfully, my father is Jarlot Sr and my mother is the old dwarf lady.

Rose: :uh-huh: But that would make you, what, a half-dwarf?

Kanatash: Hey, I never said I was a Kalashtar, you guys just all assumed that. I'm a psion Uncarnate, I can look like whatever I want.

Rose: I thought half-dwarfs weren't possible.

Kanatash: Apparently not I would say.

Rose: Wait, that would make you Jarlot's half-brother too...

Kanatash: Yep, I'm older too. Thats probably why I always enjoyed tormenting him so much I suppose.

Rose: This is unbelievable.

Kanatash: It should be because it's complete bull****.

Rose: WHAT!?

Kanatash: I was just messing with you, I'm surprised I could lead you along like that for so long actually.

Rose: So Jarlot Sr. and the old dwarf lady aren't your parents?

Kanatash: (becoming very grim) Oh, I wish my parents were ONLY as senile as those two...
rampant

09-03-06, 11:09 PM		Kanatash: (becoming very grim) Oh, I wish my parents were ONLY as senile as those two...

OOC: this will be fun:evillaugh
-------------------------

Elina - Hu-Hah

Elina has finally managed to take the offensive and is not letting up. Her fox sword dips and dances while her other hand catches the shuriken she blocks letting her throw them right back.

Tellowas - Adaptable...*sonic push*

Elina - Oof

Elina collapses.

Tellowas - Well finally it took how many doses of sleep venom?:rant: Now I have to pick up this mess.

As soon as tellowas bends down to collect his shuriken, Elina stabs him in the shoulder.

Tellowas - tricky

Elina - Thank you:D too bad I'm still holding my blade in your side.

Tellowas - ...

Ken'Baroque - Elina hold its over.

Tolos - Indeed, why did you wait so long to manifest your blade?

Elina - I couldn't, I've been trying all week to manifest one. IT just didn't work until I tried using Kitsune as a focus.
cypher_zero

09-03-06, 11:33 PM		OOC: SO, rampant, what's going on with Serene?

BTW, Gladius, I laughed my a$$ off! "Cypher brand..." Still laughing at that.
.
warforged_assasin

09-04-06, 12:25 AM		OOC: This idea just came to me. I couldn't not do it. :D

IC:

Alkran Balfro: (i.h.h.) Ok, ok. Be cool. Maybe you're not. You just need to ask...

Walks up to Terra.

Alkran: Uh...hi. Remember me?

Terra: *raised eyebrow* Um...no...

Alkran: You know. From the Beastlands?

Terra: Never been there. I think you've got the wrong woman.

As she walks away, he tries to reconcile this turn of events with his admittedly hazy memory.

Alkran: :confused: Never?

At this time, a large mailbag floating about six inches off the ground walks up to him.

13: Alkran Balfro?

Alkran: Uh..yeah?

13: I got a letter here for you.

Alkran: Wow. Already?

Taking it, he notices the return address. Changeling Interdimensional Escort Service, Inc. The letter reads:

Dear Mr. Balfro, your payment for services rendered within the Beastlands has yet to be received. Please send the following amount by the end of the month: 38,000 GP. By ignoring this letter, we will be forced to collect on the agreed collateral: "My +3 Wang". Please note that we do not accept Credit Cards, Checks, or Money Orders.

Alkran: Uh-oh...

Touche! i guess that was your revenge
rampant

09-04-06, 12:32 AM		OOC: Not much right now, I can't do her scene until sarah and Elina get back, Satnak is having her first day as well. She's just doing stuff like paperwork and watching other people fight. BOOOOOOORRRRRRRRIIIIINNNNNNNNGGG. If anyone wants to mess with it go ahead. Most of my focus is elsewhere though.
------------------------------------

Elina - This is just too perfect.

Forbes - He's almost cute when he doesn't have that look in his eye like "I'm Tirmek, what are you and what justifies your pestering me"

Elina - I wish I could get a picture.

Tolos - *coughImage*Coughcrystal*

Tellowas - Your sister fought the Terrible Tirmek to a standstill:eek: No wonder I lost.

Sivic - There was very little standing still actually.

Ken'Baroque - Should we wake them?

Elina - I wanna see their faces when they realize what happened.

Forbes - Indeed knowing Tirmek this will be the begining of a brutal rivalry.

Elina - Naaaw I just wanna tease them about how cute they look unconcious next to each other.

Sivic - Either way I'm not doing it. Your sister is scary, and Tirmek is just as bad.
--------------------------

OOC: Nothing nasty Elina is just being a sister, when you do a double KO its almost impossible not to have the two fighters next to each other on the ground.
--------------------------

Elina - Whoohoo I got into the blade-weaving intro class thats a 2 class skip.

Sarah - Grrrrr Basic Berserk : Freeing the beast within!!

Tirmek - Advanced combinant combat, 4 class skip. Now is the basic stuff, energistic reinforcement, survival, art, strategy, Aura control, study hall, tech mastery, history, espionage, mathematics, stuff like that. After that we get to chose extras like Racing (there are a couple slots left not many though and they fill prettty quick) , beast training or the haz'rack teams. The tournaments aren't open to us until we complete a few classes, once they are they have to be signed up for on an individual basis. We should try to have or sheets finished by the end of luch so we can turn them in as soon as they start accepting them.

Elina - Thats why you made us Trek up here so we can just jump down and get to the desk first.

Tirmek - Your sister matched me, and you beat Tellowas who is no slouch. I like having competition.
---------------------

OOC: Kaizer do you want to pick their class schedules, Three basics, two extras, and the one the class they each got assigned.
---------------------

Satnak (filling out massive piles of paperwork and scoring endless fights) - Fluffy sometimes I think I'd really lose it if I didn't have you around to make me laugh.

Fluffy - Meow (thanks mommy)

Illis - fy fweee (why me)

Yes the cat is wrapped around his face again.
Charles Phipps

09-04-06, 01:43 AM		OOC: Feel free to strick this from canon if you don't like it Kaiser_Ryu, it's a bit of a variant on a previous post but it still works. It's just funny.

Rose: My god Elin! Are you not ready yet!

Elin: Huh?

Rose: I've got the "Year in a Day" magical artifact prepared already! It'll allow us to travel across all of Eberron in a single day! We've already got permission from your parents for it!

Elin: We do?

Rose: Well that's what Kanatash says and the conjunction will only be available for a single hour longer to make the spell work!

Elin: Where are we going?

Rose: I'm going to teach you all about your heritage as a Dragon mark noble of House Lyrander!

Elin: Eh?

Rose: Come, Lilly will be accompanying us as my sorta-son from another world. He has to learn about his heritage as well. You must also discover your BARD'S SPIRIT Elin!

Elin: But I'm going to be a knife thrower!

Rose: Pish posh!

*turns over hourglass*

*Blink*

*Elin and Lilly return a year later holding hands with Rose, having only seconds pass in real time*

Satnak: What the HELL?

Rose: We just had an AMAZING adventure together!

Elin: absolutely!

Rose: I've missed the first nine years of my neice's life and my son's so I thought I might as well get to know them. I've got tablespoons of longeviety potion for both so that Terra and Lisa NEVER know the difference.

Satnak: Oh GODS rose, you did NOT just do this!

Rose: Show her what you've learned Elin.

*Elin wearing a fabulous dress and her hair primmed in lady like fashion blows on a kazoo*

Elin: *ahem*

Elin: The Very Model of A Wealthy Dragonmark-Type Noble

I am the very model of a wealthy Dragonmark-type Noble,
I've visited the King's court, there's no one there I do not know,
I know my genealogy, I've tons of friends who give me stuff
Whenever I go out to shop, of coin I have quite enough;
I'm gentle and I'm genteel and I'm never ever crude or gruff,
I carry a magic blade, its edge I would never scuff
All the urchins love me, and they tell me all the local news
My house it is adored by all, we always win, we never lose.

Background chorus of Lyrander Girls in Airline Stewardess Outfits:

Her house it is adored by all, they always win, they never lose.
Her house it is adored by all, they always win, they never lose.
Her house it is adored by all, they always win, they never lose.

Elin:

I'm very good at poetry and difficult fencing duels;
If anyone can better me my house will simply change the rules:
I've visited the King's court, there's no one there I do not know,
I am the very model of a wealthy Dragonmark-type Noble.

Background chorus of Lyrander Girls in Airline Stewardess Outfits:

She's visited the King's court, there's no one there she does not know,
She is the very model of a wealthy Dragonmark-type Noble.

Elin:

I know our house's great history, Karrnath's and those other guys;
I know the ways of makeup, and of complicated bloodline ties.
When speaking at a party I can talk at length of Mark lore
I'm really quite good looking, I have suitors flocking by the score;
I paint, I hawk, I write, I sing, I do most any "High Skill" things
I am the greatest courtier of all within the Siberys Rings
I do a mean Aundair ball dance, too, the classic's I've all read
And if you dare make fun of me, my house will have your head.

Background chorus of Lyrander Girls in Airline Stewardess Outfits:

And if you dare make fun of her, her house will have your head.
And if you dare make fun of her, her house will have your head.
And if you dare make fun of her, her house will have your head.

Elin:

I never really have to work, 'cause that's what I have servants for
And when I walk I glide along, my feet don't really touch the floor:
I've visited the King's court, there's no one there I do not know,
I am the very model of a wealthy Dragonmark-type Noble.

Background chorus of Lyrander Girls in Airline Stewardess Outfits:

She's visited the King's court, there's no one there she does not know,
She is the very model of a wealthy Dragonmark-type Noble.

Elin:

In fact, when I buy twenty dresses 'cuz I can't decide which one is best
When I shop from dawn to dusk and never, ever really stop to rest,
When coin fly out of my purse as though it were a waterfall
When my selections grow so large the peasants can't collect them all
When I have purchased nifty toys that come from Reidra 'cross the sea,
When I spend more than you make in a whole year of work on tea --
In short, when I've gone on a real expensive shopping spree,
You'll say "The Marks are really cool, I really wish that it was me."

Background chorus of Lyrander Girls in Airline Stewardess Outfits:

You'll say "The Marks are really cool, I really wish that it was me."
You'll say "The Marks are really cool, I really wish that it was me."
You'll say "The Marks are really cool, I really wish that it was me."

Elin:

The King protects my house, he likes me more than you, you see
For all you do in Eberron, its still viewed secondarily;
I've visited the King's court, there's no one there I do not know,
I am the very model of a wealthy Dragonmark-type Noble.

Background chorus of Lyrander Girls in Airline Stewardess Outfits:

She's visited the King's court, there's no one there she does not know,
She is the very model of a wealthy Dragonmark-type Noble

Rose: So what do you think?

Satnak:...uh...Rose?

Rose: Yes?

Satnak: Neither you or Terra...and by extension Elin...are related to House Lyrander
Crystalforged

09-04-06, 01:43 AM		Caralot: Look honey, I know you're getting really worked up about your family coming. To the point where its starting to worry me, this really isn't like you.

Kanatash: You're right, but you don't understand what these people are like, especially my parents.

Caralot: Well, explain it to me then.

Kanatash: Once again, you're right. If were going to be married you really need to know these things, you need to know what you're getting into. The truth about my parents can be summed up in just two little words. Aging. Hippies.
Charles Phipps

09-04-06, 02:05 AM		A slide show by Rose Galan to show off his Quest for Frances D'Lyrander's Gold

* Narrated by the "In a World Guy"

Narrator: In a world...of peace.

Rose: This first slide is of us having set fire to Thronehold.

Narrator: One Man....

Rose: This next slide is of us recruiting an army to assault the Tower where the treasure was held.

Narrator: Will go the distance....

Rose: This is me hitching a ride on a Lyrander airship by pretending Elin was a Lyrander Noble.

Elin: YOU DIDN'T TELL ME THE TRUTH FOR OVER A YEAR!

Rose: Please ignore the girl in the Queen Amidala outfit.

Narrator: To make right....

Rose: And this is me being full nelsoned by Laural Krofft the Elvish Adventuress.

Narrator: What once went wrong.

Rose: This is me ignoring the imprisoned unicorn in ice to steal the treasure.

Elin: Poor Unicorn.

Rose: It was him or us Elin. Now here's some live action clips.

***

In Mount Doom's interior

*Rose dangles from over the edge of a cliff while Elin looms above him*

Rose: HELP ME UP!

Elin: GIVE ME THE RING!

***

Rose: As you can see, me and Elin had some difficulties with some segments of our bonding trip.

***

At Rivendale

Kanatash: You have my sword

Sir Frances, Not Ghostly: And my bow.

Lilly: And my Ax!

Rose: And thus we have...the FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING

***

Rose: As you can see, we liberally attempted to steal from the Lord of the Rings the entire trip to smooth over the boring parts. Which is strange since there weren't any rings in France's treasure horde.

***

Castle Greyskull

Skeletor: People of Eternia! I stand before the Great Eye of the galaxy. Chosen by destiny by the powers of Greyskull! This inevitable moment will transpire before your eyes, even as He-Man himself bears witness to it. Now. I, Skeletor, am Master of the Universe! YES! Yes... I feel it, the power... fills me. Yes, I feel the universe within me! I am... I am a part of the cosmos! The power flows... Flows through me! Of what consequence are you now? This planet, these people. They are NOTHING to me! The universe is power! Real, unstoppable POWER! and I am that force! I am that power! KNEEL BEFORE YOUR MASTER! Fool! you are no longer my EQUAL! I am more than man! MORE THAN LIFE! I... am... a... GOD! Now. You... will... KNEEEEEL! KNEEEEL!

Rose: I WILL NEVER KNEEL TO YOU!

Lilly: Your sword!

*Rose catches the blade*

Rose: I HAVE THE POWER!

***

Rose: Yeah, here is where we got involved in a fight against a Lich. I don't know what the hell was going on there. Here's where Lilly had some trouble with a potential suitor.

***

Count Dracula: You are a wise man, Professor, for someone who has not yet lived even a single lifetime.

Prof. Rose Van Helsing: You flatter me, Count.

Count Dracula: But not wise enough to return to your native Holland, immediately.

Prof. Abraham Van Helsing: I prefer to remain.

***

Elin: There's some more footage but it mostly involves me being traumatized.

Rose: I do admit, I'm sorry about that poor Yuan-Ti fellow we ended up screwing over.

***

Cobra Commander: ONCEEEEE A MANNnnnnnnnn
cypher_zero

09-04-06, 02:06 AM		OOcypher: *gasp!* The secret it out! That's why he hates hipppies! It's all so clear now! *faint*

Get your Orange Text of DOOM (tm) today! One Time Low Offer! One mortal soul (does not have to be your own.). Contact cypher today for this exclusive offer!
.
rampant

09-04-06, 02:08 AM		OORampant - I don't see the problem, just wipe them from existance.

Kanatash - Why are you wearing that purple cat thing costume again.

OORamant - I like floating.
-------------------------------

Gullydwarf Jarlot - (nibbling on a nail)

Serene - Hello who are you?

GD Jarlot - ahhhhhhh

Serene - Its all right I'm not gonna hurt you.

GD Jarlot - No maam big grey demon gonna kill me

Serene - Big grey demon?

GD jarlot - used to be big scary lady with just grey arm, now gots blue arm and grey all over the rest of her

Serene - Why would Satnak want to kill you?

GD Jarlot - The others they challenge big grey, they annoy and fight big grey, big grey smash them like ants, then they took the cooky made him forget how to make the firey lumpy stuff that make big grey happy. She get really mad blow whole world of us to nothingness.

Serene - Thats her, she really over reacts sometimes.

GD Jarlot - *gone*
-------------------------

OOC: I can't help myself
rwarner3701

09-04-06, 03:04 AM		Serene: :plotting: (i.h.h. While Satnak is gone teaching at The Island perhaps I can help out the poor guy and maybe some of his friends.) Dwarf, little dwarf come back I just want to talk.

Serene walks down the hall looking for the dwarf, calling out once in awhile hoping he will respond. Then from behind her she heres...

White Rabbit-Jarlot: I'm late / I'm late / For a very important date. /
No time to say "Hello." / Goodbye. /
I'm late, I'm late, I'm late.

Serene intrigued by this rabbit chases after it around curve in the hallway and finds a mound of dirt with a hole going down into the deck from one side. Carefully crawling into the hole she begins to slip and falls a long, long, long, long way down to the bottom. Luckily the token of featherfall kicked just in time to stop her as she settled carefully to the ground. Ahead of her was a single passage and the image or a white rabbit running down it.

Serene: Well I guess I'll have to follow him.
Crystalforged

09-04-06, 03:17 AM		OORampant - I don't see the problem, just wipe them from existance.

Kanatash - Why are you wearing that purple cat thing costume again.

OORamant - I like floating.
Kanatash: Still you have no idea how tempting that is. It's just... they're still family, you know? No matter how hard I try there are a few remenant of my mortal soul I just can't get rid of.

---
And so it begins. A small crystaline airskiff pulls up alongside the FF. Out of it step two elderly Kalashtar step out of it. Both are dressed in tie dye shirts and worn, cut-off jeans. The man has long dirty hair, a dishelveled beard, and a scarf on his head. The woman has short, puffy hair on her, head but leg hair that would make a wookie jelous.

Male Hippie: Whoa, man. This place is like, Man central. (lights a joint)

Female Hippie: (spotting Kanatash and rushing over) Oh, my little Regwald! You're finally getting married. I was wondering how long you'd fool around with that Cystal girl before you finally tied the knot.

Kanatash: MOM! My name's Kanatash! You swore you'd neve call me that again, I made you swear in blood!

Kithle: (popping his head in) Regwald huh? I'm going to get some mileage out of THAT.

Kanatash: :tantrum: And I told you a hundred time, I'm not going out with Crystal anymore! We stopped seeing each other years ago, I'm getting married to Caralot.

Caralot: (stepping forward) Hello, I don't think we've been formally introduced. (hold out her hand)

Male Hippie: (doesn't take her hand but instead grabs her a**) Hey there, you know your taste ain't bad son. Say young lady why don't you let me show you the inside of my skiff here. It's inside it's "bigger" than you'd think.

Kanatash: DAD! BY THE DERANGED LORDS! (sigh) I'm almost tempted to let you do it, you'd be in for a surprise. I'm so sorry Caralot, I'd like to say they're not normally like this but I'd be lying.

Caralot: Please, just introduce us.

Kanatash: Of course, this is my father, Talatash.

Talatash: (holding another joint) Does anyone have a light?

Kanatash: You have tinderwigs in your pocket dad.

Talatash: (looks in his pocket) Whoa, dude. Look at that, I don't remember putting those there.

Kanatash: :banghead: You put them there a second ago when you lit your first joint- You know what, forget it. And this is my mother, Latari.

Latari: Oh, you and Crystal just look so precious together. I really need to get an image crystal for this.

Kanatash: I told you I'm not marrying- Once again, nevermind. It's not worth it.

Latari: (pinching Kanatash's cheek) Oh, my little Reggie is growing up so fast.

Talatash: I don't like this place you live son. The corperation are like everywhere here. You gotta like, fight the man.

Kanatash: (turning to Caralot) :weep: Just kill me, please.
cancerousmango

09-04-06, 03:45 AM		Then (http://www.jimflorentine.com/art/special_ed.jpg) Air Bud (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BX7fflWr2oE) leaps (http://www.pappayon.com/premiums/wallpapers/air_bud3/800/1.jpg) onto (http://gamma.nic.fi/~jmietti/konna/*****.jpg) the ship and performs lewd dances (http://youtube.com/watch?v=3zvTRQr7ns8) in the communal showers of the co (http://youtube.com/watch?v=E88pXZuKgPc)-ed (http://youtube.com/watch?v=cLthhTnleso) ship.
Crystalforged

09-04-06, 03:49 AM		Congratulations, I'm confused. :confused:
cancerousmango

09-04-06, 04:03 AM		Congratulations, I'm confused. :confused:Natty Ice. (http://youtube.com/watch?v=DpA2tMrQ4RU)
Paulon

09-04-06, 04:16 AM		CancerousMango, could you please stick to posting stuff relevant to the thread? If you want to post random links, please start your own thread for it, don't just start posting wherever you feel it's amusing to do so.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-04-06, 07:44 AM		CancerousMango, could you please stick to posting stuff relevant to the thread? If you want to post random links, please start your own thread for it, don't just start posting wherever you feel it's amusing to do so.
OOcat: At the very least if you've going to post something random make it fit in.

Silver: Take us, for example.

Bunny: We're random.

13: But we make sense in the great scheme of things……………I can't believe I just said that with a straight face.

Silver: I know. Since when is commentary part of the "great scheme".

Bunny: Can we focus, people? It turns out Kanatash's parents are hippies.

13 & Silver: :bored:

13: I was seriously hoping for something more in the "unimaginable horror" department.

Silver: I got out all my tentacle jokes. :weep:

13: And hippies aren't going to phaze Caralot one bit.
*******
Caralot: So you're Kanatash's parents? :D (bigs hug for both of them, nearly cutting off their circulation) Ooooooohhhhh, so nice to finally meet you!

Kanatash: :uh-huh: So I have managed to find someone more deranged than me.

Caralot: They're not so bad. The devotees of Thyrs are filled with people like them.

Talatash: The church is, like, just another tool of the Man, always telling you what you can't do.

Caralot: :P Not Thyrs. It's freeform. You do what you like. It's actively encouraged, even. :D

OOC: Crystalforged, Caralot isn't like just anyone, she's a breeder of mind-boggling abberrations, a worshipper of a powerful spirit of chaos and randomness, and you haven't even met her family yet! :devil:
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-04-06, 09:45 AM		OOcat: By the way, what is it with OOCharles and "Modern Major General"? He could at least try to pick a new song.
rampant

09-04-06, 10:08 AM		Kithle - Must resist...can't not do it. *press*

The crystal dimension is unlocked.
RPGfan

09-04-06, 11:09 AM		Rose, Frances, and all the other party members of the Hunt for Frances's Treasure relax in the Forgotten Freedom's rec room.

Frances: "I wonder why we neva' met ol' Smaug."

Rose: "Who?"

Frances: "Ol' Smaug. The dragon who killed me. The one who stole me treasure."

Rose: ":censored: ! Why did you have to mention that guy? Now he'll-"

Suddenly, the ship rocks and sways.

Frances: "An' tha' would be 'im. I wish I didn't 'ave ta do this, but, Rose... I want ye ta 'ave this."

Frances hands Rose a fruit knife.

Rose: "What the-"

Frances: "Been nice knowin' ye."

Frances then charges out to confront Smaug, the Great Wyrm Red Dragon.

Rose: "His... His... His +6 Anarchic Dragon Bane Ghost Touch Returning Finnesse Speed Dagger. Sweet Sovereign Host, he's going to let himself get banished to Dollurh, just so that I can get the crew ready to save the ship."
Kaizer_Ryu

09-04-06, 11:11 AM		Kithle - Must resist...can't not do it. *press*

The crystal dimension is unlocked.
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

As far as the "Modern Major General", I figure there's an easy way out of making it canon for my character. ;)

Elin d'Lyrander
Female Half-Elf
Bard 2/Aristocrat 2/Dragonmark Heir 1

This young lady bears a striking resemblence to Elina Branford, though the personality is decidedly more aloof. Rumors are that she was created in a time hiccup involving a multidimensional rift, a "Year in a Day" magical artifact, and lots of Entity-style randomness. She considers herself royalty, and will often use her rather impressive Diplomacy check to get what she wants. This usually involves saying "Please? :bigeyes: " in her sweet, little girl voice. Most of the crew have fallen victim to it at one point or another, and even when they don't, she has the uncanny ability to make those who resist feel uncontrollably guilty about it. Her best friend is Rose's son, Lilly.

That work? :D
Kaizer_Ryu

09-04-06, 11:31 AM		Touche! i guess that was your revengeOOC: Yeah, I figured that would have been a much better way to handle it. Unfortunately, I was suffering from a serious bout of sanity at the time. I'm all better now (see below).

IC:

Ms. Fuzzy Logic: Ladies and gentlemen, I am pleased to announce that the Entity OOKaizer is over his little "episode".

OOKaizer: *wearing a funny hat* Thanks to you and your funny hat.

Ms. Fuzzy Logic: Oh, think nothing of it, dear. *to the hat* Why don't you introduce yourself?

Ezlo: Hey there, chumps! The names Ezlo. I've been cursed by my apprentice and will remain in this form till this stupid kid helps me break it.

Crew: :uh-huh:

OOKaizer: Damn that Vaati! Turning my friend Zelda into a statue! *holds up a broken blade* I shall reforge this sacred blade and rid the world of his evil!

Terra: Oh, great. I was wondering when we'd get a Minish Cap reference in this thread...

Lisa: Well, his Super Smash Brothers personality is Link, so it was only a matter of time.

OOC: For the Newbies. The SSB joke is a carryover from the old thread. I'm Link, rampant is Mewtwo (hence the floating purple cat thing comment), Rei32491 is Roy, urial angel of death is Ridley (you just know he's gonna be in the next one), and Crystalforged is Jigglypuff. There, now you know.

Rose: And Knowledge is Power!

OOC: Quiet you.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-04-06, 11:57 AM		OOC: Nothing nasty Elina is just being a sister, when you do a double KO its almost impossible not to have the two fighters next to each other on the ground.OOC: That reaction is pretty much what I'd imagined. I must say, the end was really impressive (my face still hurts from that image). And yes, Sarah scares me too. Worst part is she's only going to get worse as the rest of the seals fade.

IC:

(this is before Sarah & Tirmek wake up)

Elina: I just can't believe he took a blood rage head on. And he nearly won on his first try!

Sivic: Is it really that impressive?

Elina: I've only had to face it about a half dozen times. Once she goes in to it, you either run like hell or prepare for a beating. I've only bested her once during a rage. Facing her down is no small task, especially that look in her eyes. It scares the crap out of me.

Ken'Baroque: Any idea what causes it? Inquiring minds want to know.

Elina: Mom says she's predisposed to rages due to a combination of the Half-Fiend and Lycanthropy. She's got a closer link to the Werewolf blood than I do.

OOC: Kaizer do you want to pick their class schedules, Three basics, two extras, and the one the class they each got assigned.

I figure you know better than I do what would be good. Since it's just the basic stuff other than what they were assigned, I figure it won't have any overbearing effect on what they become. PM me if you want to, though I won't be back till later this afternoon.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-04-06, 12:11 PM		Caralot is in the library, furiously picking books off shelves, speed-reading them, and throwing them away.

Volrath: :mad: You know, just because you're getting married to my uncle doesn't give you free reign— :eek: *WHUMP!*

Caralot: I'm sorry…not here…but I've got a Collossal-sized problem bringing my family over.

Volrath struggled to remove the huge book from his body.

Volrath: You seem to be able to do dimensional travel pretty well.

Caralot: Well, that's because I was never affected by the Wild Magic.

Volrath: :confused: Wild Magic?

Caralot: What happened on my Eberron instead of the Mourning.

Volrath: You know (dodge) I could help you look. (dodge) I am the librarian here. I think there's a section on wild ma—

Caralot: Not that kind of Wild Magic. The Wild Magic I'm talking about is like……oh, let's just say it was like me only with a more subtle sense of humor. You know what, you probably don't have anything I can use here. Well, I'll leave you to your cleaning.
rampant

09-04-06, 12:43 PM		Tirmek - Well Energist re-inforce ment is pretty much a must. In fact Elina I'd advise you take it also your skipping up a notch or two and most of the others will have taken this class.

Elina - Sounds like a good Plan.

Sarah - Thats the stuff that makes you real strong right?

Tirmek - More like a reapplication of strength. From what little I understand its more about channeling your existing power through your body. Certain techniques do make you physically stronger however its mostly for toughening yourself so you can survive the kind of hammering a really good fighter like Aunt Satnak can dish out.

Sarah - speaking of her wasn't she gonna be teaching?

Tirmek - A series of advanced Energitics Manipulation courses.

Elina - And a conditioning class.

Sarah - here it is!

Tirmek - Guh! can't get it its the same time as my primary and there's no way I'm giving up,... maybe if i move this one to here then...(trails off to random muttering for a bit)

Sarah - Hey thers's this whole section we never even looked at.

Tirmek - huh? oh thats just basic ... Thats right you don't have any real energistic training. You'll need a bit of training in a new discipline so you can take the advanced classes.

Sarah - Whats wrong with being a scout:mad:

Tirmek - Nothing, but unless you want to sink all your free time into learning to be a passive user, or a weak meldshaper. You need something to use in the energitics class. Unless you can pull more power than you showed me out of those seals.

Sarah - Fine ... Lurker.

-----------------------
Elina-
Introduction to blade weaving
Energitic Re-enforcement
Physical Conditioning
Literature
Strategy
Beast Training
Haz'rack

Sarah-
Berserk 101
Psi 101 (lurker)
Physical Conditioning
Survival
Strategy
Haz'rack
Racing

Tirmek-
Advanced Combinant Combat (403)
Energitic re-enforcement
strategy
mathematics
Physical Conditioning
Racing
Beast training

OOC: yes I relaize thats more classes than I said originally, I figured they'd be ambitious.
Crystalforged

09-04-06, 12:50 PM		OOC: Crystalforged, Caralot isn't like just anyone, she's a breeder of mind-boggling abberrations, a worshipper of a powerful spirit of chaos and randomness, and you haven't even met her family yet! :devil:
OOC: The thing is that Kanatash's parents aren't supposed to bother Caralot in the slightest. Rather they're supposed to make Kanatash's life a living hell.

OOKanatash: So you admit it, you bastard. You're actively trying to make me miserable here.

OOC: (tries to look inocent) What are you talking about, your parents have always been like this.


OOKanatash: They have now that you've said that!

OOC: :P

OOKanatash: Oh, and while I'm at it, Rampant, I know where you live.

OOC: No you don't.

OOKanatash: (stutters) Well, ugh, fine, no I don't, but I'm going to find out.
rampant

09-04-06, 01:16 PM		OORampant - What did I do?

OOKanatash - You unleashed the crystal swarm.

Kithle - Excuse me! I deserve credit for that.

Crystal herd - KANATASH!!!!

OOKanatash - YOU BASTARDS brought them here!

Kithle - Again me, I just keep him around to operate the keyboard. Also thats Magnificent bastard to you.

OORampant - I'm gonna find a superscope or a Lightsaber and hurt you both.

Proceeds picking up crystals and tossing them at each other.

OORampant - Dammit all they have are hearts.
RPGfan

09-04-06, 01:25 PM		Rose, Frances, and all the other party members of the Hunt for Frances's Treasure relax in the Forgotten Freedom's rec room.

Frances: "I wonder why we neva' met ol' Smaug."

Rose: "Who?"

Frances: "Ol' Smaug. The dragon who killed me. The one who stole me treasure."

Rose: ":censored: ! Why did you have to mention that guy? Now he'll-"

Suddenly, the ship rocks and sways.

Frances: "An' tha' would be 'im. I wish I didn't 'ave ta do this, but, Rose... I want ye ta 'ave this."

Frances hands Rose a fruit knife.

Rose: "What the-"

Frances: "Been nice knowin' ye."

Frances then charges out to confront Smaug, the Great Wyrm Red Dragon.

Rose: "His... His... His +6 Anarchic Dragon Bane Ghost Touch Returning Finnesse Speed Dagger. Sweet Sovereign Host, he's going to let himself get banished to Dollurh, just so that I can get the crew ready to save the ship."
OORPGfan: No one wants to do a battle between the entire crew of the FF and a high level Great Wyrm Red Dragon? While Rose weilds a Magic fruit knife (+6 Anarchic Dragon Bane Ghost Touch Returning Finnesse Speed Dagger)? I really do stink at making arcs.

OOCharles: As long as we're clearing out the air, I was just humoring you.

OORPGfan: NOT HELPING!
Crystalforged

09-04-06, 01:44 PM		For future reference, the best way to get the crews attention is probably to have someone screw them over or otherwise **** them off. They have been known to destroy small countries over a single "your mamma" joke.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-04-06, 01:49 PM		OORPGfan: No one wants to do a battle between the entire crew of the FF and a high level Great Wyrm Red Dragon? While Rose weilds a Magic fruit knife (+6 Anarchic Dragon Bane Ghost Touch Returning Finnesse Speed Dagger)? I really do stink at making arcs.

OOCharles: As long as we're clearing out the air, I was just humoring you.

OORPGfan: NOT HELPING!
Great Wyrm Red Dragon: Battle, yes, yes, but what's my motivation? I was once a great Javelinwackerian actor, you know. I don't have to take this sort of abuse. I'll be on my island.

OOcat: Don't worry about arc-making, I suck at it.

Silver: He does.

13: So totally.

Bunny: He's not even very good at commentary.

Caralot: He's too lazy to write my family arriving right now.

Erk's Place People: And we're just sitting here in silly costumes!
rampant

09-04-06, 01:58 PM		OORampant - (holds up costume rack) (i.h.h. Please pick luigi)

OORpgfan - I take it if i don't choose one your gonna wump me with that paper fan.

OORampant - :D (nods)
--------------------------

Doog - Yiipee:rolleyes: a dragon whatever shall we do?

NOrbaz - With satnak having lunch at her office i got a lot of this stuff extra. :shifty: with the barrels full geuss theres nothing for it. Over you go.

Smaug - MY EEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEE
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-04-06, 02:25 PM		Caralot is sitting at her work desk when 13 shows up.

13: Mail call.

Caralot: Huh, (opens letter) wonder who—:censored: old man. Mention "it'd be highly dangerous" and he has to jump all over it. Kanatash!

Kanatash doesn't respond.

Caralot: Dmn! Must be hiding from his parents. Guess I'll just have to play dirty. Crys?

Crys (Caralot's power-neutered Crystal): Like, what?

Caralot: Take control of the Crystals and have track down Kanatash.

Crys: Will that, like, work?

Caralot: I figure if he thinks they'll find him, he'll have to run. And my backup plan involves his parents and a mass of clairsentience-inducing weed—

Kanatash: Okay! Okay! I'm here.

Caralot: I don't have any time to waste on this. My father's got it into his thick skull that he can fly his ship through the void between our worlds and not have to deal with the effects of the Wild Magic upon it.

Kanatash: What exactly would this Wild Magic, which you haven't yet explained very well, do?

Caralot: :bored: Do you really want to get married to me?

Kanatash: You said your lifestyle doesn't even require it. And you don't mention your family much. How important could it be that they be here?

Caralot: It's worse than that. If they were just trapped on the other Eberron I wouldn't be so worried. But the interaction of the Void and the Wild Magic could throw entire timelines out of wack.

13: Ouch. I know what that's like.

Caralot: Only you probably understand it fully, 13.

Kanatash: I think I can guess. So how bad an adevnture are we talking?

Caralot: It depends. We can either ask you parents for a ride—

Kanatash: :OMG! NO!

Caralot: Or we convince the captain to take us.

Kanatash: Why'd you have to go and scare me like that?

Caralot: I thought it might be nice to get the rescue and introductions over at the same time. :D

Kanatash: :twitch: What did they do to you as a child, take you to Xoriat on vacation?

Caralot: Of course not, silly.

Kanatash: Then how? :confused:

13: Hello? Crazy E.B.N.E., remember?
******
OOC: I pick Pikachu. I just sit around, and if anyone comes near me I hit them with a Thunder Bolt.
RPGfan

09-04-06, 02:37 PM		Great Wyrm Red Dragon: Battle, yes, yes, but what's my motivation? I was once a great Javelinwackerian actor, you know. I don't have to take this sort of abuse. I'll be on my island.
OORPGfan: They stole your treasure, and Frances tried to kill you when he was still alive.

OOSmaug: Fine. Let's just get this anti-climax over with.
~~~~~~~~~~
Smaug: <Insert long, boring monoluage here. Make sure Smaug comes of as egotistical, he is.>

Frances: <Insert greedy/lustful phrase here. Keep in mind that Frances is completely insane in a humorous manner.>

Rose: <Insert anticlimactic slaying of Smaug here. Be sure that it involves the fruit knife.>

Frances: <Insert last words here. Hint at Frances overthrowing the Keeper as he passes on to the after life.>

Frances Crew: <Insert farewells to the FF crew as they follow Frances. Remember, they're a lot like Frances in many ways.>
~~~~~~~~~~
OORPGfan: There, arc complete. I'm gonna go slit my wrists now.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-04-06, 03:19 PM		OOKaizer: Don't feel so bad. This crew has attention problems.

OORPGfan: But they completely ignored my Dragon... :allalone:

OOKaizer: When you've laid waste to Dal Quor, survived Xoriat twice, destroyed gods knows how many ancient cults, wiped out hordes of Warhammer 40k C'tan, turned the Lords of Dust into Pokemon, and destroyed an entire continent that was just made up... one Dragon don't really faze you much. Unless they do something like make a crack at our almost complete lack of doing anything piratey for something like 3 years game time. Your arc excluded, of course.

OORPGfan: So it's not just me?

OOKaizer: Not in the slightest. We've all been ignored more than once. Now put that knife down and put on this funny hat.
Charles Phipps

09-04-06, 03:21 PM		OOC: Well, I chose that song because I loved the original adaptation I did and wanted to show new people.

And Elin worked HARD on it!

Elin: Well EXCUSE me.

Rose: Now Now Elin, your performance was beautiful.

Elin: I'LL HAVE MY REVENGE ON YOU ALL!

*runs away crying*

Rose: Great, now she'll go off to become a supervillain.
rwarner3701

09-04-06, 03:52 PM		OOC: Alright recap time.

Elin d'Lyrander has arrived on the ship.

The Crystals are on the loose once again.

Sakura Jarlot is extremely attracted to Weylin.

Erk's Place is full of people in silly costumes.

Alkran must find 38,000 to get back his +3 Wang.

Sarah, Elina, and Stanak are on the Island attending/teaching classes.

Sa'vor is looking for the thing responsible for killing many Half-dragons and gravely injuring his son

Caralot and Kanatash are preparing to get Rose to take them to the void to stop Caralot's parents from destroying timelines.

Serene is someplace in the lower decks in what has become the new home of the Jarlot League and other unused members of the crew.

Did I miss anything?

----
Alkran: Well hello there.

Sakura Jeala: Oh, hi. Have you seen Weylin come past this way?

Alkran: I don't know what does Weylin look like?

SJ: Oh, he is amazing he has this great white hair and is tall and muscular and... :love:

Alkran: Ahh you too are seeking a true love. Perhaps I can help you if you would be able to return the favor.

SJ: I would do anything to be with Weylin.

Alkran: Great here is the plan...

----
Alkran and SJ walk up to Elin while she is talking to Sa'vor.

Elin: Can you show me the way to the captian's office.

Sa'vor: I can't I must find what was controlling the Creature.

Elin: Please :bigeyes:

Sa'vor: Well, I...

Alkran: Don't worry sir we can help her find the way.

Sa'vor: Thank you (turning to Elin) sorry I couldn't be of more help.

Sa'vor Walks away even more depressed than he was before as Elin turns to Alkran.

Elin: So you can help me?

Alkran: Of course we are a quests of our own and don't know yet where they will take us. On the way we can help you find the Captian.

----
Alkran SJ and Elin wander through the deck and find a group of redshirts standing around Darian Saito while he speaks on the great power of the entities.

Darian: The Entities have created us all and we stand here today with their bleesing. For example look at these three behind you. Only through the compassion of the entitie Kaizer were two of them allowed to remain on this ship and the third is still remembered even though her storyline ended many pages ago.

Redshirt: Umm.. pages?

Darian: It may be difficult to understand but the entities keep track of our lives with a strange system of sorting time and space into individual blocks that often move back and forth creating a uber-deminsional existance for each and every one of us. It is through their....

Alkran SJ and Elin turn around and decide to go another way.

----
Alkran SJ and Elin find Rose and Caralot arguing on the main deck.

Rose: Do you have any idea what it costs to insure against a trip to the void to confront a ship fueled by wild magic?

Caralot: it doesn't matter if they are not stopped you, me, all of us coudl very well cease to exist.

Rose: Well I suppose we can go but I don't want the blame when the insurance drops us next month.

Elin: Captian Rose?

Rose: Yes Elin what can I do for you?

Elin: I need to get to Winter Court in Rideara by tommorow can we go there instead... please? :bigeyes:

Rose: Why of course honey I don't care that much about saving the world anyway.

Caralot: Wait, what? Look at her she isn't even that cute and she is just trying to hard.

Elin: Surely you realize how important Winter Court is don't you? :bigeyes:

Caralot: Umm... no. Look I have been around cute my entire life you barely are in the running and there is no way you can make a face that will work on me.

Elin runs off crying again and concerned Alkran and SJ follow her.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-04-06, 03:54 PM		Rose: Great, now she'll go off to become a supervillain.
Word Being: We certainly have no shortage of superheroes to stop her.

OOC: Word Being is mine. You are not allowed to use it until you clear it with me and i tell you exactly what it is like.
Charles Phipps

09-04-06, 03:59 PM		Word Being: We certainly have no shortage of superheroes to stop her.

OOC: Word Being is mine. You are not allowed to use it until you clear it with me and i tell you exactly what it is like.

GASP!

BTW, Elin D'Lyrander is Elina.

:-)

Hence most of the fun of the story.

As for how she recieved a year of time with Rose off the island, that's covered ;-) It's all semi-cannon at best anyway.
Charles Phipps

09-04-06, 04:01 PM		Caralot: Umm... no. Look I have been around cute my entire life you barely are in the running and there is no way you can make a face that will work on me.

Elin runs off crying again and concerned Alkran and SJ follow her.

Great Post.

;-)
rampant

09-04-06, 04:23 PM		Physical conditioning with satnak :

Satnak - Ok now Your going to start with doing this obstacle course five times.

Later

Tirmek - My legs are cramping.

Sarah - My face still hurts from the trip down that wall.

Elina - I was on the bottom of that you can't complain.

Tellowas - I hate these weights.

Satnak - Get some water and do it again ten times. You will be assigned extra weight based on your first five times.

Students - :OMG!

Satnak - I used to do worse than this 20 times in an hour with a house on my back.
RPGfan

09-04-06, 04:39 PM		OOC: Alright recap time.

Elin d'Lyrander has arrived on the ship.

The Crystals are on the loose once again.

Sakura Jarlot is extremely attracted to Weylin.

Erk's Place is full of people in silly costumes.

Alkran must find 38,000 to get back his +3 Wang.

Sarah, Elina, and Stanak are on the Island attending/teaching classes.

Sa'vor is looking for the thing responsible for killing many Half-dragons and gravely injuring his son

Caralot and Kanatash are preparing to get Rose to take them to the void to stop Caralot's parents from destroying timelines.

Serene is someplace in the lower decks in what has become the new home of the Jarlot League and other unused members of the crew.

Did I miss anything?
Yeah, you forgot that Rose now has an uber powerful magic fruit knife. Not to mention a new load of treasure. And there is sentient rum.

Rum
Living Rum 1
When Frances d'Lyrander's ghost drank a keg of rum, it splattered to the floor due to him being incorporeal. When frances re-drank the rum 100 times in a row, it became sentient. It now flees in mortal terror of the entire crew. It's only known personality trait is that it is very high strung and screams often. This, of course, is because everyone's trying to either kill it (because it's a monster that is either A, an abomination, or B, something that'll give you XP) or drink it (because it's rum).

Note:
Worst part about slitting one's wrists, cleaning the blood up with no finger control.
rwarner3701

09-04-06, 05:09 PM		OOC: Well Elin d'Lyrander is Elina like Sakura Jeala is Jeala.

Alkran and Sakura Jeala finally find Elin, at the end of a hall being comforted by the little old dwarf lady, Martha Greyholm.

Martha Greyholm: There there honey have another cookie. Would the two of you like one also?

Elin: Thank you.

Sakura Jeala: I'll take one.

Alkran: It's ok Elin, Caralot is just having a bad day.

Elin: But Rose listened to her and not me. :pout: He must not love me anymore. :cry:

SJ: Don't worry I understand what it is like to be thrown aside.

Elin: *sniff* ...really?

SJ: Yeah, the important thing is that there is a way to get him back.

Elin: How?

SJ: Show him that you are more than just a pretty face. That you have power and are not afraid to use it. Teach him the error of his ways by taking what he won't give you.

Alkran: :love:

Elin: ...well I suppose I could give it a try.

Alkran: Great now we need a plan... and a source of financing.

Martha: And more cookies you seem to have eaten all of the ones I had.

Alkran: Hmm... cookies.

Alkran bends down and whispers to Elin

Elin: Miss Martha could you bake some more cookies for us... please :bigeyes:

Martha: Of course dear the best medicine I know is some good home cooking.

----
Later that day Martha is working away in her kitchen while Alkran, Sakura Jeala, and Elin sit in her living room.

Alkran: Good now we have a product to sell and the two of you should be able to guilt people into buying tons of them for ridiculous prices dispite the small packages.

SJ: And once we have money we will be able to set up an organization to show how terrific we all are so that we can capture the hearts of the ones we love.

Alkran: :Love: ...yeah *sigh*

Elin: ...ok

Martha: There you go two whole batches of cookies for the three of you.

Alkran: Elin...

Elin: Could you make us some more miss Greyholm?

Martha: Well there are plenty there...

Elin: So we can share them with everyone else... please :bigeyes:

Martha: Alright honey how many would you like?

SJ: Hundreds, as many as you can make.

----
Later that day in the Redshirt section of the ship Sakura Jeala and Elin stand behind a small table in little green uniforms selling small boxes of cookies for a mere 5 gold pieces.

Redshirt 1: Wow these are amazing cookies.

Redshirt 2: Yeah they are its a shame the packages are so small.

Redshirt 3: I bought 2 this morning and left them in the rec room. They are gone already.

Redshirt 1: Guess we will just have to buy tons of them.

Redshirt 2: Yeah good thing we have that magic icebox to hold them in so that they last until the next time they sell them.

Redshirt 3: I better go back to my room and get some more money to help these poor girls pay for their camping trip.

Alkran hidden just around a corner in the hall starts talking to himself.

Alkran: Excellent now with a source of funds I can pay off my debt to the changlings and start to help Sakura with her plan. All I need now is some minions to help us do menial tasks.

Alkran: Hmm.. cookies... food... drinks...

Alkran: Thats it the Chili and Rum there is sentiant food all over the ship surely they can be controlled and put to a task. Best of all they already roam the ship freely so noone will notice them advancing the plot.

Alkran runs off heading down into the storage to set loose the chili and rum hopefully convincing them to help in his quest.
Crystalforged

09-04-06, 05:16 PM		Note:
Worst part about slitting one's wrists, cleaning the blood up with no finger control.
(best evil mastermind impression) Excellent. I do believe the final stages of the process are drawing near. This joke confirms that very soon our sense of humor will canabalize his own, turning him into yet another regular poster who has had his sould consumed by this thread.

...Or at least I HOPE he's joking.
urial angel of death

09-04-06, 05:33 PM		OOC: Not all regular posters have their souls consumed by the thread. Mine is right here.

OOUrial's soul is furiously trying to escape the glass bottle it is trapped in.

Soul: Please let me out. If there is any goodness left in your heart please free me from this torment.

OOC: Quiet you.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-04-06, 05:35 PM		OOC: Well Elin d'Lyrander is Elina like Sakura Jeala is Jeala.
OOKaizer: :teach: Actually, Elin is Elina like Jaela Jarlot is Sakura Jaela. In this campaign, Sakura Jaela was renamed Jaela Daran by the Flame.

Sakura Jaela = Jaela Daran (Captain Jarlot's daughter and Keeper of the Flame)

Jaela Jarlot = Time Hiccup Jaela from an alternate timeline that no longer exists (formerly Batman).

And, while I'm on the subject, NJ26 is the last of the Ninja Jaela clones Ketler created from WAY back near the beginning of this campaign. By this time in the campaign, they've aged to at least 18, so Sakura chasing after Weylin is less icky than it originally seems.

OORei: *yawn* You talk too much.

OOKaizer: :pbbbtt: I'm being helpful.

OORei: :bored: You're being boring.

OOKaizer: :raincloud

BTW, rwarner, nice job so far. Especially using Darian. I don't think he's been used in, what, 40 pages? Good work scrounging up unused talent.

I wonder what'll happen to Klaz now that Steve Irwin (the Crocodile Hunter) is dead? What do you all think? Too soon to be funny?
cypher_zero

09-04-06, 05:41 PM		OOC: Wait... he died? Finally? Why did no one inform me of this? *huff* *begins cleaning up pentagram on floor, picture of crocodile hunter and book entitled "spells to bring death to those you hate"*

Seriously though, how'd he die? A gator. Please say it was a gator.
.
urial angel of death

09-04-06, 05:47 PM		OOUrial walks over to OORei.

OOUrial: Stop crushing your brother's dreams add pay up.

OORei: No give me a few more days I find a replacement soul by then.

OOUrial: Too late. Now pay up.

OORei: What about my pets. You could take one of their souls instead right?

OOUrial: You've run out of dogs from the last two years.

OORei: What about my cats.

OOUrial: You fool cats have no souls!

OORei: Please just give me more time. :weep:

OOUrial: :rolleyes: Fine now stop crying. You have one month to find a replacement soul.

OORei: Thank you.

really OOC: A stringray got him.
rampant

09-04-06, 06:18 PM		OOC: Actually it was a stingray.
--------------------------------------

Serene - Where am I?

CheshireJarlot - Your in JarlotLand the last remnants of the Great Jaarlotopia that your girlfriend blew to smitherines.

Serene - Oh why would she do something like that?

Cheshire Jarlot - Truthfully we brought it on ourselves. I warned Super Jarlot not to mess with the chili. BUt did they listen to me nooooooo. I mean kidnapping the cooky they should have known that would bring down her wrath.
------------------------------------

Survival

Sivic - Now the key to getting along anywhere be it cityscape or wilderness is water.

Sarah - Ok *starts digging*

Sivic - Um sarah maybe you shouldn't -

*Geyser*

Sarah - WEEEEEEE!
--------------------------------------

intro Blade weaving

Tolos - Summon your blade

Elina summons her Mindblade

Tolos - Now let your spells seep into it.

Elina - AAahhhhhh

A small hurricane with psychic slivers bursts forth.

Tolos - (In a tree) let me rephrase that "a spell"
RPGfan

09-04-06, 06:31 PM		(best evil mastermind impression) Excellent. I do believe the final stages of the process are drawing near. This joke confirms that very soon our sense of humor will canabalize his own, turning him into yet another regular poster who has had his sould consumed by this thread.

...Or at least I HOPE he's joking.
:heehee
Don't worry, I am... As far as you know. *cleans bloody keyboard*
Gladius_Lucix

09-04-06, 08:28 PM		Liam is working in his lab. Crumpled papers cover the floor. Liam looks extremely frustrated.

Liam: Ah, Igor. Glad you could come. When I'm stuck for ideas, it always helps me to talk them over with some.

Igor: Glad to help, thir. Thith is for Mith Terra and Mith Litha'th daughter, ithn't it?

Liam: Yes, it's for Sarah. Why?

Igor: Would you mind putting my name on the card?

Liam: Ah. No problem. Okay, let's get to work. How does this concept sound: an enchantment for any clothing that Sarah wears that, if it would be destroyed, it turns into a ribbon, or collar, or something like that. Then, when the original outfit fits again, it changes back.

Igor: Thoundth good. Now, how do you propothe to go about making thith?

Liam: I have no idea.

Igor: May I thuggetht a Projective Tranthmutathion Field?

Liam: That's brilliant, Igor! The field triggers the clothing's own transmutation! Easily fine tunable for modesty by the wearer, or in this case, the wearer's parents, and easily applied to new clothing. Since Sarah isn't actually changing now, I think a schema of the enchantment is the best option. Once her lycanthropy is more pronounced, the enchantment can be put on the clothing she wears, and then they can fine tune it.

Igor: That thould work. thir.

Liam: Then let's get to work.

Liam hurries and Igor plods as they gather the materials and equipment to design the new schema.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-04-06, 08:45 PM		Don't worry, I am... As far as you know. *cleans bloody keyboard*
OOC: The member is catching on.
OOUrial: You fool cats have no souls!
:hoppingma You have just won the undying enmity of all that is Silvercat. Seriously, don't diss the cats.

And as far as I heard, Steve got punctured directly in the heart by the stingray. I'm fairly certain that he died as he wanted, so nothing's wrong with a joke.
IC: Silver: Girl scout cookies? Okay, 13, 'fess up.

13: Yeah, well, you got me. :D [[OOC: 13 is a god of all those little things in life that annoy your very soul right out of your body, so this is definitely him.]]

Silver: Well, I'd better get JJ to take some pictures of SJ in her uniform.

Bunny: Let me guess: perverted "delivery" fantasies. :whatsthis

Silver: So long as it's between consenting beings of mature age, they can be as freaky as they want. :D
Rei32491

09-04-06, 08:49 PM		OOC: Ok, I finally got around to doing this. These are my characters and a brief description. I'll do a long overdue Wiki update sometime soon.

OOKaizer: :rolleyes: Yeah. Sure you will.

OORei: :mad: Quiet you.

Nalfein
CE Elf/Lich(?)
Invoker 12/Mystic Theurge 10/Cleric 5/Binder 20

For lack of a better description, Nalfein is a Pyro. His loves are fire, power, fire, destruction, fire, and fire. If you ever see him use an attack spell that is not in some way fire based, assume he's either desperate, confused, or bored. Even Ash thinks he's a little obssessed. If things are too quiet, he will "liven things up", as he says, by blowing something up. Usually Redshirts. He also has the ability to switch between 2nd, 3rd, and 3.5 edition rules as he sees fit, or ignore them all together if it's funny.

That said, he tends to be grossly incompetent. He has absolutely no patience what-so-ever, and will torch you at the slightest provocation. He is not stupid, though, and will not do so if there is a good chance for painful retribution. His only friend, if he can even be called that, is his old Sigil Prep roommate Volrath.

He is currently stuck in an uncertain point between life and unlife. And no, he is not a "Deathless". They suck. What this means and what he's going to do about it (if anything) may be revealed at a later date.

OOKaizer: You mean once I bug you enough about it.

OORei: *Pulls out his BIGASS SWORD* :mad: You wanna go?!

OOKaizer: *pulls out the Master Sword* :P Anytime, punk!

*GIGANTIC SWORD FIGHT ENSUES*

Muradin
LE Dwarf
Fighter 12/Stone Lord 9

There's not much to say about this one. An idiot dwarf with a penchant for smashing, a Druid-like resistance to alcohol, and the habit of speaking in 3rd person. Wields the Bloodcriers Hammer and the Hammer of Thunderbolt, and carries an Endless Decanter of Ale at all times. A former adventuring companion of Volrath and Terra.

Cuddles
LE Advanced Winter Wolf

Nalfein's familiar. He is quite fond of Nalfein, but doesn't usually take his crap. He wishes to be called Spleen-eater, due to them being his favorite food. He is also quite intimate with Marish, and at least one of her kittens is probably his.

Steve
Earth Elemental

Muradin's summoned Earth Elemental. How Muradin managed this is beyond even Volrath and Terra. Steve is never the less bound to Muradin, but the moron often mistakes Steve for a monster and tries to smash him. He is good friends with Earl, the ships bound Fire Elemental.

Cheese
Yes, that Cheese

Nalfein created this abomination for the sole purpose of annoying the crew. He had intended for Cheese to be under his control, but things didn't quite work out. Cheese now wanders the ship aimlessly. His position can often be determined by the banging of heads and/or screams of frustration of the crew he encounters.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-04-06, 08:54 PM		Cheese
Yes, that Cheese

Nalfein created this abomination for the sole purpose of annoying the crew. He had intended for Cheese to be under his control, but things didn't quite work out. Cheese now wanders the ship aimlessly. His position can often be determined by the banging of heads and/or screams of frustration of the crew he encounters.
OOcat: However, his higher brain function can be brought out if he drinks chocolate milk. It just has to be lactose free, or……well…you don't want to know.

13: I thought we got rid of his high brain? :confused:

OOcat: If he's going to be wandering around the ship, there has to be a way to pacify him.
urial angel of death

09-04-06, 09:03 PM		OOKaizer's mastersword rips deep into OORei's stomach.

OORei: Well ****.

OOUrial enters wearing a black robe and holding a wicked scythe.

OOUrial: Dying twice in three months is something even monthly substitute souls cannot save you from. I simply have to take you now.

OORei: Catch me if you can.

*chase scene begins*
Kaizer_Ryu

09-04-06, 09:03 PM		Seriously, don't diss the cats.He wasn't. He knows better. Or at least he should. :P But seriously, I think at least one of my cats is short one.

She's staring at me right now...

Silver: So long as it's between consenting beings of mature age, they can be as freaky as they want. :D
I was thinking about why I went off the handle so far before, and I'm pretty sure the reason I didn't like the idea of Lisa and Terra getting pregnant by a total stranger while drunk so vehemently is that, in my opinion, such a thing is no better than rape. And that's not funny under any circumstance.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

*chase scene begins*
OOKaizer: You're Ridley, not the angel of death. That's just your screen name.

OOUrial: Oh, no. This is my new DM outfit. :devil: *runs off after OORei*

OOKaizer: ...I am so not looking forward to next session...
urial angel of death

09-04-06, 09:08 PM		nevermind
cypher_zero

09-04-06, 09:15 PM		OOKaizer: ...I am so not looking forward to next session...
Um... yeah. I've got Crystalforged in my party. I'm DM. Mind you, this is the guy that created Kanatash. *shudder*
.
urial angel of death

09-04-06, 09:35 PM		OOC: Kaizer I may make you go through the enworld version of tomb of horror at seventh level, or maybe the world's longest dungeon without allowing the PCs to rest for more than 1 hour before wandering monsters come, or even keep on the borderlands using 1st edition basic set rules and after you finish repeat until playing with only three levels drives you insane. Also I have gotten some very helpful DMing tips from the Square staff that made the PSX version of FF4. :evillaugh

Finally please tell Rei to hurry up his alchemy conversion or else he will have to play using mine. :devil:
RPGfan

09-04-06, 09:46 PM		Rum: *RANDOM UNHOLY SCREAM OF TERROR*

Kudos to Charles for starting the whole gag.

As for the blood on my keyboard, it's actually from bashing in the head of- actually, self mutilation sounds better. Less Death Penaltyness.:angelhide I really wish I wasn't trapped in Texas.
urial angel of death

09-04-06, 09:50 PM		OOC: Don't be so sad in Texas you can get paid to kill several people each day and have it be perfectly legal. Oh I so love the death penalty. Does that make me a horrible person? Wait what am I thinking? That just makes me a DM. :D
Kaizer_Ryu

09-04-06, 09:53 PM		Um... yeah. I've got Crystalforged in my party. I'm DM. Mind you, this is the guy that created Kanatash. *shudder*
OOC: I weep for you. Yet I cheer for Crystalforged. Is that bad? :D

In other news, I still can't believe it, but I forgot to reintroduce two of my own characters. They're not my "main" ones, but still...

Shame on me.

"Not-Walter"
Half-Farspawn Broodling Kython

Terra's animal companion. During a trip through Xor'iat in Volrath's, Terra's, and Muradin's days before the Forgotten Freedom (Volrath claimed it was the 'scenic' route), this little guy made his way onto the deck of their airship. He immediately took a liking to Terra, so she decided to keep him. He was, in actuality, a Kalashtar trapped in the body of the abberation. He had been sealed by the Quori for being a Quori Mindhunter, similar to what they do to Elan's, but was eventually able to influence his host.

He eventually made his way to Xor'iat and struck a bargain with the Daelkyr. They gave him the ritual to break his prison, and he would watch over Volrath till he began evolving and gained immortality. While in Dal Quor, Terra obtained the final ingredient for his release, a Quori. Lacking a body of his own, he fused his soul with Terra's, forever binding the two together. The abberation remains, but is only somewhat smarter and decidedly less violent than its kin. He can usually be found within Terra's robes (he has his own extradimensional pockets in there) or prowling the bowels of the ship in search of carniverous waffle irons.


I've got one more, Amish Dave. He didn't turn out as funny as I'd hoped, and I've only used him twice. If you want him, read his Wiki entry and go nuts. Or ignore him, I got bored with him a while ago.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-04-06, 10:10 PM		OOC: Kaizer I may make you go through the enworld version of tomb of horror at seventh level, or maybe the world's longest dungeon without allowing the PCs to rest for more than 1 hour before wandering monsters come, or even keep on the borderlands using 1st edition basic set rules and after you finish repeat until playing with only three levels drives you insane. Also I have gotten some very helpful DMing tips from the Square staff that made the PSX version of FF4.

OOC: Don't be so sad in Texas you can get paid to kill several people each day and have it be perfectly legal. Oh I so love the death penalty. Does that make me a horrible person? Wait what am I thinking? That just makes me a DM. :D
OOKaizer: You all see what Rei and I have to deal with. All I say is he's a viscious, malevolent jerk (which are all compliments to a good DM, according to him), and he threatens me with more horrible mutilation of my poor characters and psyche. :weep:
urial angel of death

09-04-06, 10:13 PM		OOC: Thus making you give me more compliments. Just remeber Rei will be taking over next campaign and he will be even worse.
rampant

09-04-06, 10:21 PM		Sarah - HOME!

Elina - SWEET ROLLING DECK!

Satnak - Up you two.

Sarah - NO WAY

Elina - We're not moving from this spot.
Crystalforged

09-04-06, 10:23 PM		OOKaizer: You all see what Rei and I have to deal with. All I say is he's a viscious, malevolent jerk (which are all compliments to a good DM, according to him), and he threatens me with more horrible mutilation of my poor characters and psyche. :weep:
Yes, yes, as I've always said one of the primary requirements for a good DM is a liberal dose of sadism. However what I want to know about is the most important ability of a DM, a good evil laugh.

Myself, I don't have much experience hold the reins of a DM but I did spend a little while there and when I was, you know what I did?

I pacticed.

All the time.





I perfected the arts of both the deep, malevolent laugh and the high-pitched, insane giggle. I used them on more than one occasion to frighten co-workers and terrify players.

So how is YOUR evil laugh Urial?



:evillaugh :evillaugh :evillaugh :evillaugh :evillaugh :evillaugh :evillaugh :evillaugh :evillaugh :evillaugh
urial angel of death

09-04-06, 10:28 PM		OOC: I do both of those but also talk like the strange old man from Family Guy.
Gladius_Lucix

09-04-06, 10:37 PM		When did this thread become a sanity sapping horror to rival Cthulhu? I get the feeling the seeds were planted when Kanatash arrived.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-04-06, 10:48 PM		OOC: Thus making you give me more compliments. Just remeber Rei will be taking over next campaign and he will be even worse.
OOC: Yes, yes, the master of 2nd ed broken characters. And he says I minmax...

Just remember that we are the ones who made him as twisted as he is today. He would be nothing without us. You shall all weep at my vengeance come the end of his campaign. :devil:

Is it obvious yet that we have a bit of a rivalry going?

rampant posted while I was typing. Assume this is before the girls return.

IC:

Lisa: *knock knock* Hon? Can I come in?

Terra: Sure.

Lisa: *entering* You've been in here for hours. I know something's bugging you. The link works both ways.

Terra: Yeah. One of the newbies said something that made me wonder. He really thought I was someone he'd met on the Beastlands. He wasn't kidding either.

Lisa: :confused: But we've never been there. Could it have been an alternate?

Terra: No. I'm pretty sure it's worse. Check this out.

Terra calls Lisa over to a scrying pool. The image reflected in it is an advertisement for a line of videos. Not the good kind, the "don't let your parents know you know about them" kind. The most disturbing part of this is who is featured on the cover.

Lisa: :eek: :OMG!

Terra: I know. From what I've gathered, when I forgot to shield your room, it was ratings gold for these people. They apparently work the same way the junk mail does.

(OOC: Another carry over from the old thread. If I remember correctly, it works on a passive collection field that connects to every plane of existence. The junk mail is things like "20% off your scrying bill" and the like. Yes, we know it's free, that's the joke. As for the incident she's referring to, that was when they were still dating. You can guess what happened.)

Lisa: But, that was just the one time! Look at all this! Volume 567?!

Terra: When they couldn't get anymore of us, they started using changeling impostors. It's become a smash hit. We're very popular, apparently.

Lisa: Just from that one incident? I don't feel so good all of a sudden...

Terra: I know. :raincloud I'm never gonna live that down. :raincloud

Lisa: But what does that have to do with what that new guy said?

Terra: This. *the image changes* Apparently, the makers of the video are affiliated with a changeling escort service. And guess who the featured girls are.

Lisa: I think I'm gonna hurl...

Terra: At least it explains why we've been left in relative peace by the lower downs. Why risk horrible retribution when you can see it for 10 GP a minute?

Lisa: :mad: That doesn't help.

Terra: Yeah, didn't help me either.

OOC: Please don't show Sarah or Elina. I've got that covered. Probably by tomorrow.

And Crystalforged, I doubt it's as creepy as yours, but urial's no slacker in that department.
rampant

09-04-06, 11:09 PM		Elina - Can't move,...Tolos evil.

Sarah - Need sleeep,...Sivic has no sense of humor.
rwarner3701

09-04-06, 11:23 PM		OOC: One of the side effects of doing so much wiki stuff is that I just re-read most of the old stuff and am going to be doing it again. Luckily it lets me bring back characters like Martha and Darian that have not been used for awhile and now...

In the ship's hold where the majority of the food and drinks are stored for both the bar and the mess Alkarn is searching for sentient food to help him in his plans.

Alkarn: I have paid of the changelings and now I just need to help Sakura Jeala and Elin. Not to mention that I need to find a way to win the heart of my true love SJ.

Then from down an aisle Alkarn hears a few voices apparently coming from some wine casks. Moving closer he is able to hear...

Danyels: I'm telling you Jack the best way to survive is to stay here.

Jack: No they will come for us eventually we must take the offensive to show them what happens when they try to drink us.

Danyels: No one has even been down here in the last week. With the kids off at school and the wedding being planned no one has had time to drink except that weird ghost and he just wanted rum.

Jack: Yeah but its just temporary, do you know what happens at weddings? People drink tons of alcohol because of the open bar.

Danyels: Fine I guess we need a better plan.

Jack: Good I'm getting out of this barrel, got to be free to slosh around.

Alkran steps up as they exit the barrels and clears his troat. Jack dives under a shelf while Danyels tries to back into the barrel.

Alkran: I'm sorry I couldn't help but overhear and I think I have a way to help you.

Danyels: Really?

Alkran: Yes, you see I don't drink anything since I lost all memory of a weekend in the Beastlands, and my companions are both underage.

Jack: Yeah right kids drink almost as much alcohol as adults because they think it makes them cool.

Alkran: Seriously Elin only drinks tea and Sakura Jeala rarely drinks, just enough to fit in.

Danyels: And you want to help us?

Alkran: Well actually we are working on a number of plans and could use some help but I see no reason that we couldn't stop people from drinking at the same time.

Jack: Well I suppose it is at least better than the plans Danyels has.

Alkran: Great now I was looking for some sentient chili and rum to help us out also.

Jack: Well the rum is in the keg at the end of the aisle... somehow I think it is drunk.

Alkran: Good and do you know where...

A man cries out from near the far end of the storage room.

Man: Oh my god its eating me. The food is eating me. It burns.

His screams go on a moment longer before he is cut off with a gruesome gurgling.

Alkran: I think it might be that way.

Jack and Danyels grab the keg with the rum in it and follow Alkran off towards the chili.

----
OOC: Yay someone continued the story with Serene

Serene: So now you all just hide here?

Cheshire Jarlot: Well we don't really have much choice last we saw here she was still so violent and no one will volunteer to go up and check what she is like now.

Serene: Doesn't it get boring down here with just lots of Jarlots?

Cheshire Jarlot: Oh no it isn't just us there are lots of alternates here like the Satnaks that aren't violent and a few Jealas that no one cares about and of course Hippy Kanatash.

Serene: Hippy Kanatash?

Cheshire Jarlot: You know Kanatash right well the hippy version is about the complete opposite of him he just kinda floats around in a mushroom forest down that right path smoking all day and blowing rings of smoke.

Serene: Don't any of you have homes to go back to in your own plane?

Cheshire Jarlot: well you see that a long story that I don't have time to tell.

Cheshire Jarlot begins to fade from existence.

Serene: Wait I have more questions.

Cheshire Jarlot continues to fade slowly from his tail up his body leaving just his grin which stays quite a bit longer before finally disappearing as well.

Serene: Well! I've often seen a cat without a grin, but a grin without a cat! It's the most curious thing I ever say in my life!

As Cheshire Jarlot fades from existence completely Serene turns to the right and begins to move off with new found purpose.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-04-06, 11:34 PM		Elina - Can't move,...Tolos evil.

Sarah - Need sleeep,...Sivic has no sense of humor.
Terra and Lisa find their daughters completely exhausted as Satnak tried to convince them to move.

Terra: How'd they do?

Satnak: They're alive, aren't they?

Elina: Must...remove...nervous system...

Sarah: Zzzzzzzzzzz.........

Lisa: Rough first day.

Satnak: They'll get used to it.

Terra: Once they recover, we've got something for them.

Lisa: A little first day congratulations.

Sarah: Zzzz... *snort* *sniff* ...smells...

Elina: *sniff* ...good...

Sarah: *sniff* ...like...

They leap to their feet.

Both: COOKIES! :D

They then promptly fall to their knees again.

Sarah: Awwwww...

Elina: Move, legs! ...must...have...cookies...

Terra: Later. Let's get you two to your room. You can tell us all about your first day there.

Elina: With cookies? :bigeyes:

Lisa: :) With cookies.

OOC: Alice in Wonderland, Forgotten Freedom style. One of the most trippy tales ever told on the most insane ship in existence. We have reached a new high/low. Well done. :thumbsup:
rampant

09-04-06, 11:52 PM		Satnak - Don't jump around too much your not used to the weights.

Sarah - That didn't stop you from making us go up that freaking wall 100 times.

Satnak - The ground was padded.

Elina - There will be a reckoning.

Satnak - Bring it kids. Hey Terra, Lisa have you seen Serene?

Lisa - She went to talk to her dad last time we saw her.

Satnak - Thanks.
---------------------------

Satnak - *knockknock* Hey Serene you in there?
Charles Phipps

09-05-06, 01:21 AM		OOC: Serene is out on deck! ;-)

Rose: *BLAM BLAM BLAM*

*walks out onto deck, covered in blood*

Serene: What the hell was that?

Rose: I've successfully banished, killed, imprisoned, thrown overboard, polymorphed, slain, transfigured, sent to another dimension, fired, retired, terminated, and abandoned every member of the crew that's not regularly used. Most of them have been sent to the Cornfield.

Serene: The what now?

Rose: Its a pocket dimension that contains characters not currently in use from all over the place.

Serene: Why do this?

Rose: It's all in preperation for Caralot and Kanatash's wedding. Plus yours. I want this place to be moderately sane in preparation for the celebration.

Serene: And killing most of Satnak's friends helps...how?

Rose: Oh please, Satnak doesn't have any friends. This is a favor though because...

I am an Sky Pirate King

Oh, better far to live and die
Under the brave black flag I fly,
Than play a sanctimonious part,
With a pirate head and a pirate heart.
Away to the cheating world go you,
Where pirates all are well-to-do;
But I’ll be true to the song I sing,
And live and die a Pirate King!

Serene: That's not really changing any of the words?

Rose: Who died and made you Bard critic?

Serene: I *AM* the sexy bard Spoony.

Rose: Damnit.

Elina: Ummm...Uncle Rose?

Rose: Yes Elina?

Elina: There's a girl whom looks JUST like me except dressed as a witch and being extraordinarily cute to everyone.

Rose: Oh that's just Elin. She's you approximately one year from now when you take up wizardry.

Elina: But I'm not going to be a wizard.

Rose: Well that's what you said to me before you did. She got rid of the Dragon.

***

Flashback to the Dragon of Frances D'Lyrander's Attack

Dragon: BLAH! BLAH I SAY! I am an evil Dragon! Ugh, what dialogue

Elin: Darkness beyond twilight, Crimson beyond blood that flows, buried in the stream of time is where your power grows...

Dragon: That spell seems familiar....

Elin: Buried in the flow of time. In thy great name I pledge myself to darkness. Let the fools who stand before me be destroyed by the power you and I possess.

Dragon: Wait, I know..OH CRAP....

Elin: DRAGON SLAVE!

*Dragon is consumed in a spectacular miniature nuclear explosion as its blown backwards before detonating*

Rose: I never liked Q'barra anyway.

***

Elina: I can't have an alternate double running around!

Rose: You can if she's EVIL.

Elina: Huh?

Elin
Teenage version of Elina
Chaotic Neutral with good tendencies Celestial Lycanthrope
22nd Level Sorcerer (yes, you read that right)

Fiddling with the chaos magic of the ship, Rose accidentally took Elin along with him for a five year (though he only claims to be one year) trip through time-space-reality that resulted in her taking up the study of wizardry under the Bard. There, Elin studied magic under Mordenkaine, Elminster, the Flesh-Weaver, the Hags of Sora Kell, and other powerful magicians. Her favorite master was Linda Reverse, the Atomic Explosion creating Magic User with her companions Goudy, Bellos, Delgadis, and Amalia.

Because of the peculiar nature of the ship, Elin has returned before she left and accidentally may have prevented herself from ever leaving. She doesn't know how to approach her mommies about what has happened because they're completely unaware of anything having happened to their little girl. She's also a trifle uncertain about how to approach Lilly since she had a relationship with him in the future.
rampant

09-05-06, 01:53 AM		Satnak - Found you!!:D

Serene - When did you get home?

Satnak - Bout a half hour ago, i ended up following your trail through a rappit hole, and past a tea party, Hippy Kanatash, JArlot in a red and black dress ordering around a bunch of cards, and a cat that would give fluffy a run in a creepy contest.

Serene - You didn't kill them did you?!!:eek:

Satnak - I had the urge to, but I was worried one of the more agresive varients had gotten ahold of you up ahead. IT let me out here.

Serene - We need to talk.

Satnak - Yeah your right just one quick thing. ELIIINAAAA

Elina - Unsuccsesfully trying to sneak away.

Satnak - You and your sister need to put the weights back on and leave them on till bed-time them put them back on in the morning after you clean up.

Elina - AWWwwwwwww
-----------------------

Satnak's room

Serene - *sigh* look about us being..

Satnak - Married?

Serene - Yeah

Satnak - I love you, I enjoy being with you, your music amazes me, I wish to protect and be with you till the end of my days. I wish more than anything for you to accept me as your Mate.

Serene - Thats the equivalent of a proposal isn't it?

Satnak - I...I think so I wasn't there when Terra and Lisa decided, so I'm going with what I know.

Serene - Yes you silly girl I accept.

Satnak - ... (insert hugging and joyful sobbing)

A few minutes later

Serene - So do you want to have the ceremony with Kanatash and Caralot?

Satnak - I was wondering when those two would finally get official. Um maybe, I talked to Illis today and it turns out his intended is a Priestess of Dol Arrah. Apperently she's been Fighting Rixle tooth and nail to get in on our ceremony, Kratwe (remember her) spilled the beans to the two of them, and well Rixle was dangling from his own ship's mast last time I checked.
----------------------------------------

Silver - When are they gonna get to the good stuff? :bored:

Bunny - Yeah come on get pregnant already.

13 - Wait a minute aren't you death?

Bunny - Yeah I wann see Satnak's kid with Serene's living metal power. Oooooh the blood baths.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-05-06, 09:36 AM		Elin
[i]Teenage version of Elina
OOC: Ok, so, do we now have three versions of Elina running around, or is this a "puff of insanity" turning the Elin I posted into this? Can it be both?

Please say it can be both. :D

Meanwhile, OOKaizer's soulless cat continues to STARE at him.

OOKaizer: *shivering* The eeeeeeeyyyyyyyeeeesssssssss...
Kaizer_Ryu

09-05-06, 11:09 AM		Most of the crew is on deck. They stand around a closed coffin, but don't seem too broken up about it. Most, in fact, are either asleep or wondering if they can leave.

Rose: Today, we mourn the passing of one of our own. No one really liked him that much, so I'll finish this up quickly so we can get back to the time loops, wedding preparations, and the scrubing of my brain with acid after seeing that advertisement involving my sister.

Terra: :mad: THAT WASN'T ME! :mad:

Rose: *ignoring her* Klaz died as he lived. As a complete moron.

Klaz: *muffled from the coffin* I'm not dead.

Vrin: What was that?

Rose: *quickly* Nothing! *composing himself* We all knew he'd meet a gruesome fate at the hands of those creatures he loved...

*sounds of both snickering and gagging from the crew*

Rose: ...but we never thought it would take this long.

Klaz: *muffled* Seriously, mates. This ain't funny.

Rose: That said, lets decide how to get rid of the body and who gets the honor.

Klaz: 'EY!

Rose: I trust you all filled out your applications for the position.

He opens up a box stuffed to the brim with pieces of paper. After a few minutes of sorting, he announces the results of the contest.

Rose: Ok, let's see. "Let me eat him", 12 of those. "Torch him". 3 of them. "Use in experiments. Namely mine." 15 of those. "Bury him with dignity"? Wow, 5. There's more goody goodies on this ship than pyro's. "Toss him over the side". A whopping 50 of them. Unfortunately, they're split between doing it over Argonessen or Xendrik. A few more suggesting doing it over Flamekeep.

Sakura Jaela: :mad: HEY!

Rose: And the winning method is..."use him as ammo", at an impressive 300 votes. Now to find out who gets the honors.

He pulls out another box with the names of the crew on more paper. He mixes it up as some of the crew load Klaz into a cannon.

Klaz: I'm not dead!

Rose: *pulls out a name* Gregory!

Gregory: WHAT?! :eek:

Rose: You put your name in the box, you have to do it.

Gregory: But...but...

Rose: You can atone later. Just do it.

Gregory: :weep:

After much convincing and threatening, he finally pulls the trigger.

Klaz: CRIKEY!

The coffin rockets off into the distance and explodes (somehow).

Sharn is destroyed for a fourth time.

Gregory: Oh, COME ON! That's not even possible!

Lisa: Which is why I don't put my name in that box anymore. Come on, Mr. Fallen Paladin in Training. Let's go get you atoned. Again.
rampant

09-05-06, 11:10 AM		Serene - She can be so... Cuddly:D

Satnak - zzz

Serene - I better find Caralot and talk to her.
----------------------

Serene - Caralot?

Caralot - Oh!? Hello Serene.

Serene - I was wondering If we could Mooch your Ceremony into a double wedding? If you need a minister Satnak says she can bring either a preistess of Dol Arrah, or a Ship captain who isn't a "drunk" lunatic.

Caralot - Why the emphasis on drunk?

Serene - Because acording to Satnak He'll hit on everyone at least once, up to and including the elementals.
--------------------

Vrin - I was the camera man, after all that we went through together...I WANTED TO PULL THE TRIGGER.
rwarner3701

09-05-06, 11:25 AM		OOC: I just realized I mixed up Alkran and SOS most likely because of the +3 Wang. Anyways Alkran has realized his nights of binge drinking and hiring of changelings has gone too far and is looking for a more stable life.

Alkran followed by Jack and Danyels carrying Rum and a few of the Chilies head back to Martha’s room to aid in the production of cookies. Walking in they see her still slaving away in the kitchen trying to meet the insane demand for the new cookies.

Martha: (to herself) Must keep cooking… more cookies… please…

Alkran: Martha you don’t have to keep cooking any more.

Martha: What? Really?

Alkran: Yeah relax I got some help for you they just need some instructions and you can take a break.

Martha: Thanks so much sweety it has been so long since I have been able to sit down and knit a nice sweater.

Alkran: Don’t worry about it Rum here can mix the batter and the Chili can put them in the oven and take them out then Jack and Danyels will work on the packaging.

Martha writes down the recipes and moves into the living room to sit down in a large recliner. A few minutes later she looks completely refreshed and begins to knit a sweater.

----
Having run out of cookies again Elin and Sakura Jeala are on the way back to their cabin/base of operations to check on how production of the next batch is coming along.

Elin: So… I guess I am a teenager.

SJ: Seems that way. Must be the Jealas all got to old to be fun to obsess over.

Elin: Really?

SJ: Yeah you see we have been around for years now and once we were “legal” as Ketler says there was a little celebration but then it was over.

Elin: Why?

SJ: Well we wouldn’t do anything with the crew since they all seemed kinda creepy so not like Weylin. :love:

Elin: At least I am still a diplomat but now there is that sorcerer running around too and I’m not sure I want to deal with that.

SJ: Yeah I know what that is like.

Arriving at the door to the room they step inside to see Martha half done with a bright orange sweater with the letter E on it and another with the letter S on it sitting on the table. The food and booze are working away in the kitchen and dining room preparing more cookies for tomorrow and there is a plate of the newest batch sitting on the table. Each of them grab a cookie and start to eat collapsing into the other chairs.

SJ: Hmm... these are different, have you had one Martha?

Martha: Why no deary I have just been so busy working on these sweaters for Lisa and Terra but I suppose I could take a break.

Martha takes a cookie and begins to eat it but quickly spits it out and turns to the two girls to see that they have already finished theirs.

Martha: These cookies taste like rum that is what is so strange.

SJ: Rum? But I don’t drink and Elin is to young.

Turns to see Elin run off to the bathroom with her hands clamped over her mouth.

Martha: Not just rum it seems very strong like it was concentrated somehow.

Rum: (wandering in from the kitchen) Possibly by being passed through a ghost exactly 100 times.

----
Alkran is standing outside Terra and Lisa’s room. He hesitates a few times and finally reaches up to knock. After a few moments Gregory answers the door.

Gregory: Umm… hello?

Alkran: Is this Terra and Lisa’s room?

Gregory: Oh, yeah I am learning to stand still for countless hours looking important so that I can be a good paladin.

Alkran: Umm… alright. Are Terra and Lisa here?

Gregory: Terra is, hold on a minute. (turning back into the cabin) TERRA.

Terra comes to the door and sees Alkran.

Terra: Look, I already told you nothing ever happened between us.

Alkran: I know that is why I am here I wanted to apologize.

Terra: Oh sorry it has just been a long day and I don’t need a reminder of what is going on outside of the ship.

Alkran: About that, I was hoping that I could help. You see I just had to pay off the changelings and I think I can help you find them.

Terra: Really?

Alkran: Yeah I feel bad that I came here and started bothering you two and your kids. If you want to track them down I’ll be more than happy to help.

OOC: Kaizer I’ll let you take Terra’s response from here.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-05-06, 11:43 AM		Terra: Unfortunately, this kind of thing is near impossible to stop by force. I'd have to go between multiverses again, track down and kill/erase the memories of not only these people, but anyone with a copy, or even a mental image.

Alkran: And the problem?

Terra: While it'd take exactly the amount of time the plot required, I'm not into bloodbaths anymore. Time travel's not an option, either. We're already in hot water for the little stunt OOKaizer and OORampant pulled.

Alkran: The 9 and 8 year jumps? Yeah, I heard about that. Anything else I can do?

Terra: I'd like to at least get my revenge for their using my and my wife's image without consent. Reman Wescal (ships lawyer) should be around here somewhere. I'd like you to talk to him about you being a witness against them.

OOC: Ok, off to work (grumble). This could be fun. :devil:
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-05-06, 11:54 AM		Serene - Caralot?

Caralot - Oh!? Hello Serene.

Serene - I was wondering If we could Mooch your Ceremony into a double wedding? If you need a minister Satnak says she can bring either a preistess of Dol Arrah, or a Ship captain who isn't a "drunk" lunatic.

Caralot - Why the emphasis on drunk?

Serene - Because acording to Satnak He'll hit on everyone at least once, up to and including the elementals.
Caralot: And why a captain?

Serene: :confused: You mean you don't know?

Caralot: Know what?

Serene: Captains can marry people.

Caralot: :eek: ……… :censored: Okay, when we meet my dad, do not mention that fact to him.

Serene: Oh, so he's a ship's captain? :)

Caralot: He's got his own airship, which he stole from House Lyrandar.

Serene: That sounds remarkably like—

13: :confused: Whoa! Wait up here, aren't you supposed to be wandering around Jarlotland?

Serene: *puff*

Caralot: Satnak is going to smash you.

13: :bored: You mean more effective than last time?

Caralot: :censored: I don't have time for this, my father is probably being buffeted by a time-storm right now—*breeze of time* (disappear)

13: *sigh* Better go tell Kanatash.

OOC: Just trying to keep some consistancy here (as much as is allowed on this ship :rolleyes: ). Caralot can be restored by going and saving her father and his entire ship from getting destroyed by a bolt of dimesional-warp prevention (their wild magic could potentially rewrite all of our timeline).
Crystalforged

09-05-06, 12:29 PM		Kanatash: WHAT! So let me get this straight, my fiancee just ceased to exist because her father is trying to punch a hole from their reality to ours with wild magic and if we don't go do something about its going to rewrite history?

13: Yeah, thats more or less it.

Kanatash: (shrug) Well, living on this ship I should have known something like this would happen sooner or later. I'll just have to resign myself to bachelorhood.

An unseen force delivers a massive slap across Kanatash's face.

Kanatash: (holding the half of his face which wasn't just knocked off) SWEET JAELA! Alright, alright I'm going! I was only joking! Ugh, I suppose I'll have to borrow my parents airskiff, I don't have time to get Rose to loan me the FF. (sigh) When resumes existing she's probably going to make me profess my love to her one-hundred times again...
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-05-06, 12:58 PM		13: Yeah, thats more or less it.
13: Aaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnd, not quite it.

Kanatash: Don't tell me it's even more complicated and harder than I think it is. :crazy:

13: Nah, nah……well, in one respect it is.

Kanatash: Okay, go ahead. :weep: (braces for mind-boggling)

13: They aren't using Wild Magic.

Kanatash: Oh, well, that's useless.

13: They are Wild Magic.

Kanatash: :confused: Lost me.

13: You see, when Caralot's father's ship got hit by the Wild Magic, it and everything and one on it got warped. Now you know how magic leaves behind a lingering aura even after the originating source is gone (See detect magic spell)?

Kanatash: WILL YOU GET TO THE TWIST HERE!

13: The ship and everyone on it gives off a lingering trace of Wild Magic. Now, in Caralot's world that's not a problem. But other realities are trying to keep from being warped permanently by it, and thus are ganging up against the ship to make sure it doesn't come anywhere near them. It just so happens that this'll get it destroyed.

Kanatash: So……………I can't bring the ship back here, I have to save them and take them back to their own world.

13: Exactly. Should be quite easy, really: just show up, tell them who you are, and when they stop struggling they'll get pushed right back into their world. Then Caralot will exist again and we can find a proper way to bring them all over.

Kanatash: Not the way I expected to meet her parents.

Bunny: Just her father. Her mother's dead.

Kanatash: How would—oh, right, death guy.

Bunny: :D That's death god.
Gladius_Lucix

09-05-06, 01:00 PM		Liam puts the final chisel strike in the schema.

Liam: Done! Thanks for the help, Igor.

Igor: You're welcome, thir.

Liam puts the schema away, and leaves to tell Terra and Lisa, when he hears Kanatash yell "WHAT?" followed, about a minute later, by a loud *SLAP*. Walking over, he finds Kanatash, asks whats going on, and has it explained.

Liam: I've got nothing better to do (other than make that present for Elina and Sarah), and this Wild Magic may open up new and exciting possiblities for Weirsan. Mind if I help?

Kanatash: So you're helping out of boredom and self-interest?

Liam: I guess so.

Kanatash: You're in.
rampant

09-05-06, 01:55 PM		Satnak - Where is Serene?

!3: Down the rabbi-URK

Satnak - We did that already.

*Puff of Logic*

Serene - (holding tea cup) This is getting old. Tea's good though.
luna18moon

09-05-06, 03:24 PM		Slaypaw: ...No lie, so don't even try, to tell me that you're not the guy...
Fluffy:*nuzzle*
Both are STILL :pint:
rampant

09-05-06, 07:55 PM		Tirmek is doing homework in his room.

Tirmek - Volume of a Sphere is 4 pi time the Radius cubed?

Ketty - How was school hun.

Tirmek - If Sarah and Elina can keep up the pace they set for themselves, I might actually have a fight on my hands for valedictorian. How was work?

Ketty - :rolleyes: Slow day just a few jewel theives, and a small gith incursion.
------------------------

Serene - Satnak, Kanatash might need some help for a rescue mission.
Crystalforged

09-05-06, 09:03 PM		Kanatash: Satnak is welcome if you want to come but she better get here quick. My fiancee may not currently exist but she can still kick my *** and the longer I wait the harder she hits.

Liam: So we're going then?

Kanatash: Yes, get in the airskiff. Anyone else who want to come better get here in the next five minutes.

Liam: So are your parents coming?

Kanatash: No.

Liam: Why not, this is their soon to be daughter-in-law we're saving?

Kanatash: One, they're both so senile they still think I'm marrying Crystal so they're chatting with them not to mention they're discussing the finer points of bong making with :coolcthul .

Liam: So do you have more family members coming.

Kanatash: (chuckles darkly) Oh, yes. You have no idea. You know, Liam, I'm doing you a huge favor bringing you with me.

Liam: Really? If its that much of a problem I can just stay here-

Kanatash: No, no. That's not what I mean. I'm just saying you should be very, very glad your going to be off the ship for the next day or so.

Liam: :confused: What are you talking about.

Kanatash: Oh, you'll see. And I'll probably get hell for it...



OOC: I'm turning it over to you from here Silver. When they get back however I've got something "planned." :schemes:
rampant

09-05-06, 09:12 PM		KIthle - WHy do I have to come?

Satnak - Kanatash is not the only one who hates crystal.

Michelle - Why me then?

Satnak - Meatshield.
urial angel of death

09-05-06, 09:17 PM		Volrath runs over to Sarah and Elina, who are currently sleeping.

Volrath: Come on we need to get going.

Sarah: *rubs droopy eyes.* What for?

Volrath: To get wedding gifts for Satnak, Serene, Kanatash, and Caralot and to show you two around the multiverse.

Elina: But we have school.

Volrath: Don't worry Nalfien is coming too. All his binder levels switch to chronomancer when he shifts to 2nd edition rules. He'll set it up so we get back a few seconds after we leave.

Sarah: What are the gifts?

Nalfien: *appearing out of thin air* There are a lot. It will save time if we just tell you as they come up.

Volrath: Remeber Nalfien you aren't allowed alone with them and if you try any chronomancy without my instructions I am ripping you limb from limb.

Nalfien: Yes sir. *begins creating time wrinkle for their trip*

Elina: What was that about?

Volrath: Nalfien is a very lonely person and thus can't be trusted around any female of less than 40 challenge rating.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-05-06, 09:39 PM		OOC: Dang, urial posted while I was typing. This is a little while before his post.

BTW, lol for that little crack at Nalfein. Probably in his best interest that he doesn't try anything. ;)

IC:

Elina: Make it stop, Momma... :weep:

Sarah: *whine of pain* :weep:

Crystal Swarm: :D LIKE, OMG! YOU ARE SO, LIKE, ADORABLE! :D

The Crystals (about 2 dozen so far) have the girls in a death grip. Having been imprisoned for some time, they had so far been kept from the unfortunate girls. Once the two came across a group of about 4 of the Valleygirl immitating Kalashtar, though, the purple haired monsters just keep coming. Unfortunately for the girls, their hearing is especially sensitive to higher frequencies, at which the Crystals excel at producing.

Elina: I think my ears are bleeding... :weep:

Sarah: Curse my listen check... :weep:

*yoink*

A pair of tentacles has pulled the girls free of their captors.

Terra: *holding the girls* Ugh. I though we were done with these. Gonna have to whomp Kithle good for this one.

Volrath: Don't you read the Plaque? He can't help it.

The Crystals turn and see Terra.

Crystals: YAY! IT'S, LIKE, THE CANDY LADY!!! (OOC: Yet another reference to the old thread, not really important)

Elina: Make the screeching stop... :(

Sarah: *whine* :(

Terra: No candy today. But I think Volrath wants to "play".

Volrath: :devil: *holding two curved blades with serrated edges, several flails, knives, forks, and a club* I've been feeling a little peckish...

Terra: I'll leave you to your work. *walks away with the girls*

*CRYSTAL MASSACRE ENSUES*

Volrath: *BELCH* Ahhhh...that hit the spot.
urial angel of death

09-05-06, 09:43 PM		OOC: Kaizer I read up on the Full Metal Alchemist manga and you hit everyone for their homoculus except Nalfien. Wrath is a dex based melee fighter who always keeps his cool outside of a fight. Nalfien is none of these.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-05-06, 10:00 PM		OOC: I was focusing more on the "I'm a little crybaby with mommy issues" and the completely insane look on his face. I know Nalfein doesn't fight like him, but he acts like him. That, and Wrath uses transmutation, which says Wizard to me. Put them together, and Nalfein is the closest thing I could think of. :P

If I'd thought of it at the time, I'd have made Terrek be Pride. I don't think he could be any more perfect for that role. :D
rampant

09-05-06, 10:03 PM		Satnak - This rig is so slow. I'm getting out and pushing.
urial angel of death

09-05-06, 10:05 PM		OOC: Wow more character development either I haven't got to or the manga is much different from the anime. First Wrath has no mother that I know of just a father, he hasn't used transmutation, and pride hasn't come in yet.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-05-06, 10:09 PM		OOC: :embarrass Oops. I've only read parts of the manga, but the anime gets to the mommy issues and alchemy real fast if I remember correctly. I'm pretty sure he doesn't have a father in it, either.

And trust me. Think Terrek as frontman for a larger scheme and you've got Pride. Just sans 3 hour monologues. :P
urial angel of death

09-05-06, 10:13 PM		[spoiler]

OOC: In the manga all of the homoculus share a father and wrath is the youngest. No mother is ever mentioned and all of the sins ahave been used except pride, and sloth has only barely made an appearence. This is at chapter #37.

[spoiler end]
Kaizer_Ryu

09-05-06, 10:21 PM		OOC: Or so you think. :P I know what you're referring to, now. :D

IC:

OOcat: :zzz:

*WHACK*

Bunny: Wake up! They're waiting on you!

OOcat: :zzz:

Silver: Still no go?

Bunny: Not yet. I may have to temporarily lift my "no excessive violence with out death" prohibition.

OOcat: :zzz:
urial angel of death

09-05-06, 10:25 PM		OOC: Good lord the more I read the more it seems like Goblins but more so. Time and time again lovable characters are built up and then brutally killed.
urial angel of death

09-05-06, 10:26 PM		Damn double post

OOC: A well got something else to say anyway. I will be working on the trip first thing tomorrow morning.
rampant

09-05-06, 11:28 PM		OORampant (in mewtwo suite) - WHAZZZZZZZZMM

OOCat - OUCH!!!

BUnny - Sneak attack with a lightsaber, ooooooh.

Silver - He's gonna feel that in the morning.

OORampant - *Charge Shot**Charged Psychic*

OOCat - Alright alright I'm up

!3 - hey wait how did he have two items?

Bunny - He threw the saber while holding the charge, for psychic. Then he picked up the scope and charged it.
Charles Phipps

09-06-06, 12:22 AM		Rose: At last, I have the PHILOSOPHER'S STONE!

Edward Elric: YOINK!

Rose: YOU SON OF A :censored:!

***

Rose: And that's why I wasn't able to send you back in time with the Philosopher's Stone.

Elin: Bull:censored:

Rose: Language my dear.

Elin: So is my younger self still a diplomat and not a sorcerer?

Rose: We're having some serious issues about alternate doubles, so I've decided to use this Wish spell on a scroll to fix it.

Elin: You're going to send me back in time with it?

Rose: No!

*makes wish*

*poof*

Sarah: Oh this is a huge :censored: improvement.

Rose: Yes, now Elin and Sarah both have future doubles running around the ship but now both are distinctly different!

Sarah: FIREBALL!

*KABLOOM*

Rose: That was extraordinarily painful.

Sarah: What about your son Lilly?

Rose: Well, he got his name changed and hooked up with his half brother. Turns out his father was some sort of big huge alchemist back on his world. Even made him a warforged brother.

***

Elsewhere

Half Metal Paladin Edwin Elric: And he called me a girl's name. Jerk.

Warforged Alonzo Elric: He was a lot like mom!
cypher_zero

09-06-06, 12:29 AM		OOC: Just so you all know, I don't think that Sir Elton will be making an appearance again. As such, his characters and any plots they may have been involved in should probably just be dropped.
.
rampant

09-06-06, 01:28 AM		OOC: Why not?
--------------------

Klaz - (i.h.h. ok i got out of the box, now im in the remains of the sharn aquarium,... Theres a frigging huge sting ray behind me isn't there)

Friggen huge stingray - ...(yes)
-------------------------------------

Michelle - Are we there yet?

Satnak - YOU WANNA HELP PUSH?!
cypher_zero

09-06-06, 02:20 AM		OOC: Here's why: http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=695988 Read that thread. It should explain everything. Short version is, he made himself look like an ***** in front of probably 1,000+ people, given the number of "active members" and the fact that I get pm's about it daily and it pops up in other threads. Sort of a "Hey you ever have a dm that was a royal..." so yea, check it out.
.
rwarner3701

09-06-06, 02:35 AM		Alright just to check and make sure I have this right.

Elina: Kaizer's original daughter of Terra and Lisa attending school/time hopping for wedding gifts

Sarah: Kaizer's original daughter of Terra and Lisa attending school/time hopping for wedding gifts

Elin: 13 year old diplomat

Sara (name changed by me): 13 yeah old sorcerer

----
Alkran makes his way through the ship on his way to Reman's office. Stepping in he nods to Cabin Boy and takes a seat to wait for Reman.

Cabin Boy: Would you like something to drink while you wait?

Alkran: Just some water would be nice.

Cabin Boy: Water is the strongest drink; it drives mills.

Alkran: Sounds good to me.

Cabin Boy pours the water into a tall glass and hands it to Alkran.

Cabin Boy: So what are you here to see Reman for?

Alkran: I am helping Terra and Lisa to stop a company from using their likeness.

Cabin Boy: He who seeks revenge should remember to dig two graves.

Alkran: It is not really revenge they are after it is justice.

Cabin Boy: I was actually talking about you. It is better to be the victim of injustice than to be unjust yourself.

Alkran: Has anyone ever told you that for a 14 year old you...

Reman: (interrupting him) Alkran you can come in now.

Cabin Boy: Yes, yes they have.

----
Elin still quite drunk from Rum's cookies is being helped to Mickey's office by Martha and Sakura Jeala. They walk right in and Mickey begins to look her over.

Mickey: You say she only had part of one cookie?

Martha: I believe so, they are quite strong and she is still so young.

Mickey: You wouldn't happen to have any more cookies would you?

Sakura Jeala: I brought them in case you had to test them or something.

Mickey reaches out takes a cookie holds it to his nose then tosses it in his mouth. Chewing it quickly he wobbles a little closing his eyes for a moment before looking back slightly to the right of Martha.

Mickey: Wow... this is great, I haven't been this drunk for weeks.

Martha: But what about the poor child?

Mickey: she should be fine. Gonna have a heck of a hangover but it should teach her to avoid alcohol at least until she is older. If you want, Norbaz has a special Wake-up juice that might be able to help.

Martha: Ok we'll head down to the kitchen and see if he cam fix her a glass.

Mickey: ...if you have any more cookies I'm sure I take care of them for you.

SJ: We'll keep that in mind.
Charles Phipps

09-06-06, 02:41 AM		OOC: That's about right there.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-06-06, 08:18 AM		OOcat: You know, our body does sleep sometimes. You don't see me wacking you to carry on your plotlines during my day. *sigh* Okay, Okay, I'm movin'.

13: Since when did I become !3?
******
The rescue team (OOcat: Let's see: Kanatash, Liam, Satnak, Michelle, am I missing anyone?) scrables aboard the airskiff (I have no idea what it looks like (hint, hint)). There are a few minutes spent moving around the huge hooka-bong, the sitar, the many beanbag chairs, and the various hallucinations. Finally they are ready to set off.

Michelle: Um, does anyone know where we're going?

Kanatash: :blink: Um, no.

Suddenly a light-blue blur leaps from the Forgotten Freedom to land upon the deck of the skiff. It bounces once or twice, yapping everyones' heads off, then zips up to stand on the bow of the skiff.

Quench: ARF! :D

Kanatash: :bored: Oh, good, the loyal dog is going to lead the way.

The skiff begins to rumble.

Bunny (floating in the air): :whatsthis Brace yourselves.

Silver (floating in the air): Always follow the safety direcitons of a death god, they have other peoples' experience.

Everyone else hesitates for a moment, then lashes themselves to whatever they think is the safest.

The skiff accelerates like a Loonytunes character.

Existant People: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

The universe around them seems to just dissolve, and suddenly there is just endless infinity.

Kanatash: So this is what the space between worlds looks like.

Michelle: It's so black.

13: Actually, it's a really deep blue.

Michelle: You sure?

13: I've seen it from the outside.

Silver: The captain has now turned off the "lash yourselves down, lest you be rendered a gooey paste"-sign. Feel free to move about the ship, but don't fall over because there is no guarantee that we would even be able to find you.

OOC: Have some fun with this, and I'll write up them rescuing the ship.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-06-06, 08:59 AM		13 (intercom voice): *ksssh* This is your copilot speaking. We are about to encounter some turbulence.

The ship is bounced around like a pinball.

Michelle: You call this “some turbulence”?!

Kanatash: You forget that you’re speaking to a god of subtly annoying things.

13: :D

Kanatash crawls—since walking might get even him thrown into the endless void—up to where 13 is standing next to Quench. There is a howling sound, like thousands of American Idol losers.

Kanatash (talking loudly above the storm): I’m guessing this means we’ve hit the time-storm. So how do we find the ship?

13: That’s where you come in. Navigating the time-storm isn’t like navigating anything else. It’s going to take you through a bunch of memories that happened in your past, and each one, if followed, leads somewhere related to that memory. Since you have the most important memories of Caralot, if we follow you and you follow them then that should lead us to her father’s ship.

Kanatash: And I do this how?

13: Up front.

Kanatash looks at the void in front of the ship. While it’s impossible to see the storm itself because it’s deep blue swirling against more deep blue, faint images of things he remembers can be seen like reflections of the shards of a broken mirror.

Kanatash: :( Why me?

13: You asked to marry someone from a multiverse of crazy people.

Kanatash: I did, didn’t—:eek: HER ENTIRE MULTIVERSE IS CRAZY?!?!…………You mean, more than mine?

13: Imagine the FF, only everywhere.

Kanatash: …………………

OOC: I’ll get the rest up maybe later or tomorrow. In the meantime have some of the characters revisit past moments.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-06-06, 09:48 AM		Rose: Yes, now Elin and Sarah both have future doubles running around the ship but now both are distinctly different!
Lisa: We should have seen this coming.

Terra: Yeah. It's impossible to have nice things on this thread.

Lisa: What should we do?

Terra: Well, they both are and are not our daughters, so I guess it's up to them.

Lisa: Future doubles that are more or less alternates of our girls. What is this obssession the Entities have with creating multiples of us?

Terra: It's an easier way to keep completely out of character stuff from becoming canon than going ape****.

Lisa: *sigh* At least this ship has no shortage of rooms for them...

OOcat: You know, our body does sleep sometimes. You don't see me wacking you to carry on your plotlines during my day.
Only the weak mortals need sleep! :P
cypher_zero

09-06-06, 10:05 AM		Sleep is for the weak!!!
.
rampant

09-06-06, 11:02 AM		in the time storm

Satnak - Mom, Dad, please not again I hate seeing that again and again. The night my parents died, watching them struggle against the binding spells, see them burnt away from the inside. *shudder*


KIthle - You cannot tempt me storm, I know full well you cannot truly bring me back to her, and even if you did pull me back through time, I'm not so foolish as to tamper with the past.

13 - hey!
Gladius_Lucix

09-06-06, 11:10 AM		Liam: Please, gods, no! Never again! NO!

Liam falls to the ground, curled in the fetal position.

Liam: (mumbling) Freshman Common, please gods no. Freshman Common, please gods no. Freshman Common, please gods no...
Kaizer_Ryu

09-06-06, 11:42 AM		Liam:[/b] (mumbling) Freshman Common, please gods no. Freshman Common, please gods no. Freshman Common, please gods no...
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Oh, that brings back memories.

IC:

Lisa: Why are we here?

OOKaizer: You wanted to know why we create doubles and alternates.

Terra: Which OOKaizer are you?

OOKaizer: Explaination-OOKaizer.

Lisa: :rolleyes: Makes sense.

Within OOKaizer's mind, the three walk down a hall with many doors. There are labels like "discarded plots", "future ideas", "fun way to mess with people", "pleasant mental images", etc. They make their way to a door labeled "NO ENTRY".

Explaination-OOKaizer: In we go.

The room is almost completely dark aside from the light coming through the door. In the center of the room, bound in chains in every concievable way, and even a few that aren't, sits a smaller, bug-eyed version of OOKaizer.

???-OOKaizer: What do you want from us? *gollum*

Explaination-OOKaizer: *to the girls* Observe.

He holds up a sheet of paper to this OOKaizer with OOCharles's decidedly un-canon use of Sarah and Elina. He immediately reacts, trying desperately to attack the offending posts as he froths at the mouth.

???-OOKaizer: THE PRESCIOUS!!!! HE STOLE IT FROM US!!!

Terra & Lisa: *anime sweatdrop*

Explaination-OOKaizer: Yeah. This is Canon-OOKaizer. Useful at times, but can go overboard easily. That's why we keep him in here most of the time. We create doubles to pacify him without being killjoys.

Canan-OOKaizer: Nasty posters twisted it, prescious!

The three leave him to his rambling.

Terra: What's behind this door? *marked "Possible Incarnations"*

OOKaizers: *all of them* NEVER OPEN THAT DOOR!

OOC: I may or may not decide to go anywhere with this later. I just thought it was funny, and they really don't want to open that door.

No, you can't either. :P
Gladius_Lucix

09-06-06, 11:50 AM		:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Oh, that brings back memories.

Thank you. Exactly what I was going for. *bows*:D
Crystalforged

09-06-06, 01:01 PM		Liam: Please, gods, no! Never again! NO!

Liam falls to the ground, curled in the fetal position.

Liam: (mumbling) Freshman Common, please gods no. Freshman Common, please gods no. Freshman Common, please gods no...
OOC: :tongue: (Nelson Laugh) I took College Bound English course in High School so I never have to take college English.
OOC: I may or may not decide to go anywhere with this later. I just thought it was funny, and they really don't want to open that door.

No, you can't either.
OOKanatash: You saying that makes me really, really want to open it.
rampant

09-06-06, 01:52 PM		OORampant - You see this is why the voices in my head stay locked up together. Keeps them from sinking too far into themselves.

OOKaizer - :rolleyes: braggart
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-06-06, 04:18 PM		Of all the crew aboard the skiff (except for the Non-existants and Quench) only Kanatash is not writhing under the pain of past memories.

Kanatash (yelling above the howls of pain and the "noise" of the storm): How much farther?

13 (also yelling): Just listen.

Struggling to hear, Kanatash at first only notices the rather odd staticy sound that is the time-storm. However, after a few minutes of straining, he catches the faint whif of a piratical Irish-like voice singing a song.

"O, my daughter lies over the open! *stomp-stomp*
My daughter lies over the free! *stomp-stomp*
My daughter lies over the open! *stomp-stomp*
So I'll bring me to my daughter to see!"

Kanatash: I don't suppose that's some horrible void beast that's going to torture the rest of the crew to maddness so I can watch in amusement?

13: Nope.

Kanatash: Pity.

Soon through the deep blue of the void there can be seen glimpses of a ship, huge, wide-bodied (if you know what a Chinese junk looks like), with two rings of sails—one fore, one aft—around its body. It appears to be in the center of the storm, and is even being licked by bolts of deep blue "lightening".

Kanatash: I don't even need to guess. Just take us in.

Quench gets the skiff close enough that Kanatash can see that there appears to be only one crewmember on deck, and old satyr standing at the wheel and singing as loudly as possible.

Kanatash: So how do I turn this tub around?

13: Just get that guy (pointing to the satyr) off the wheel.

Kanatash: Easy enough.

13: He's very stubborn.

Kanatash: I can be very pusuasive. :devil:

13: Not if you want to marry Caralot. :D

Kanatash: What?

13: *kick*

Kanatash is booted off the skiff, and actually falls onto the deck of the other ship with a cartoonish *splat*. Unphazed, Kanatash pries himself upright, and strides forward.

Kanatash: (ihh: So I can't use my usual methods. Well, I'm not totally useless in other areas.) You there, satyr. I'm going to have to ask you to turn—

Kanatash finds a verrrrrry wicked looking rapier pointed at his face.

Kanatash: :bored:

Satyr: Don't ye think about it, beasty. I know yer type, and this here rapier be sharp enough to cut even somethin' wit'out form like ye. I know not what foul pocket of space ye and yer glittering ship came from, but I'll not let any of ye keep me from my daughter's wedding!

Kanatash: Daughter's………your name wouldn't happen to be Jarlot?

Jarlot: (suspicious look)………………Aye.

Kanatash: So Caralot's father is a satyr? You'd think she would have mentioned that. Wow, her multiverse is like the FF.

Jarlot: So, you're one of her comrades from the Forgotten Freedom? (looks him over) Yer not that crazy knight Michael, are ye?

Kanatash: What? :pbbbtt: No. I'm Kanatash, the one she's about to marry, unless you get destroyed and prevent her from existing.

Jarlot: :blink: …………………… :D M' boy!

Jarlot takes his hands off the wheel to give Kanatash a great big hug. Like the snapping of a rubber band, the entire ship is drawn somewhere at blinding speed, until it hangs in the sky over a countryside that looks suspiciously like Cyre.

And the skiff is nowhere to be seen.

OOKanatash (looking sideways at OOcat): Are you trying to take the Magnificent Bastard title?

OOcat: Nope, not in the slightest. :D

OOC: I'll come back later today and finish this up.
urial angel of death

09-06-06, 04:35 PM		OOC: Wow Kaizer you are messed up. Then again who am I to talk. I have tons of personalities. One of them bears quite a resemblence to Barry the Chopper (FMA).

IC: Elina, Sarah, Nalfien, and Volrath appear in a world viewed from bird's eye view and rendered in 16-bit sprites. They all shrink into little sprites only a few pixels high with very little detail.

Sarah: What is this place?

Nalfien: The over-world map for Final Fantasy 4.

Volrath: We're here to meet up with an old friend and see if he will provide fireworks for the wedding.

Elina: What's your friend's name?

Volrath: Palom.

Nalfien: No its Porom. Palom is his sister.

Volrath: :tantrum: No I've told you this a thousand times. Palom's the guys Porom's the girl.

Nalfien: :noway: I'm telling you the guy is Porom.

Volrath: :headexplo You die now!
rampant

09-06-06, 04:48 PM		Palom - I AM NOT A GIRL!! *bio*

NAlfien - UHHHLLLLLLLLLLGGGGG

Kithle - I wanted to bring in the fireworks specialist.

Black Mage - Stabbity death!

Volrath - Why am I not surprised you know each other?

Kithle - I've been offering him "advice" for dealing with his problems. ;) :schemes:

Volrath - Wow You really are a magnificent bastard.

Black Mage - What?:confused:
urial angel of death

09-06-06, 05:28 PM		Volrath: Told you! Told You!

The pile of slime that was once Nalfien: Grollllomom.

Volrath: Well Palom what do you think of helping us with the fireworks for the wedding.

Palom: Who is it for?

Volrath: My uncle his wife to be Caralot and two other girls.

Palom: So your uncle is like a player. He is an insperation to us all. :clap:

Volrath: No, no, no it's like a double wedding, similar to a double date.

Palom: Ohhhhhh... Sure I'll help. Besides I might be able to get a look at the ladies' "first night". After all I got mad transformational skills.

Elina: What is he talking about?

Volrath: You know when I told you how babies are made?

Elina: Yes :mymy:

Volrath: Well on their wedding night couples like to do that, multiple times.

Sarah: You mean Kanatash and Caralot...

Elina: Aunty Satnak and Serene...

both: :twitch: :shocked: :crazy: :OMG! :yuck: :banghead: (if only we had the puking smiley of snottling forums)
rampant

09-06-06, 05:31 PM		Kithle - You know Lisa will pulverize you and Terra will skin you alive for giving their daughters the talk without them.

Volrath - I'll blame nalfein

Nalfein - HeY!
urial angel of death

09-06-06, 05:44 PM		Porom runs over to them.

Porom: Bad pervert! *smash Palom over the head with a large stick*

Palom: Ow! That hurt!

Porom: Serves you right. I heard everything, because of how loud you guys are. I'll help too. We can add in the Twin(tm) fireworks.

Volrath: Okay. :D

Porom: Palom aren't you forgetting something?

Palom: *clutching head* No I had every... Wait is today the day?

Porom: Yep. :)

Palom: Wooohoooo! :w00t:

Volrath: What's happening?

Palom: Edward is trying to adventure on his own today.

Porom: We're going to watch every agonizing moment, that the pathetic bard endures. :schemes:
rampant

09-06-06, 05:52 PM		Kithle - How is this different from being on the ship?

Volrath - ..... good question?

Nalfein - How are you in two places in once?

Kithle - Fun with Fission:D
urial angel of death

09-06-06, 07:26 PM		Edward is now standing before an imp.

Edward: Don't panic. Think back to the old days. How did I beat these fiends before?

*Flashback of Edwards old adventuring days. The group is fighting seven imps. Rydia summons a bomb, Cecil uses dark wave, and Edward... hides.*

Edward: That was less than helpful. Atleast things can't get any worse. I mean me versus one imp is one of the worst things I could think of.

Two more imps show up.

Edward: Atleast now things can't get any worse.

Six more imps show up
--------

Sarah: They are gonna kill hims for sure.

Palom: 20 gold says they eat him.

Porom: They look more life the human sacrifice type imps to me. I'll see your 20 and raise you 15.

Elina: I'll see you 35 and raise you 12 saying they mistake him for a princess and try to ransom him.

Volrath: 80 gold says they make him their "sweet little thing."

-------

Edward: Well now that all the enemy slots are filled up it can't get any worse.

imp: Hey Cleetus he has a purty mouth.

Edward: :eek: Okay things got much worse.

-------

Palom: I fold.

Porom: Me too.

Elina: Count me out.

Sarah: Sorry uncle.

Volrath: You guys are no fun. :mad:
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-06-06, 07:54 PM		Kanatash stand, being hugged by Jarlot (Caralot's father version), yet he's looking back at where his parents' skiff should have been if it had followed Jarlot's ship.

Kanatash: Well, it's not my fault that Satnak and Kithle……two people who could potentially hurt me even if they might not be able to kill me…………crap. :weep: Oh, wait, :D Quench should—

Quench: ARF!

Kanatash: Um……the Non-existant—

13: :D Not allowed to do a thing.

Kanatash: Okay, okay, this isn't my fault. (glares at OOcat)

OOcat (cheese voice): I like caaaaaaaauuuuuusing chaos.

Kanatash: :rolleyes: Well, you're the E.B.N.E. I rescued the father. What now?

Jarlot (letting go): Who ye be talkin' to?

Kanatash: You mean you can't see—

OOcat: People inside my head can't see the outside.

Kanatash: I think I'll just ignore you.

C's Jarlot: :blink: :D Well, whate'er it is, ye've got to come meet the family. HEY, BOYS! COME OUT, IT'S ALL OVER!

There are a few moments of silence. Then a hatch on the lowest deck creeps over a little, as if someone is peeking out. When they see that there is no more void around them but blue sky, a Huge giant spider, a teddy bear, and a griffon stick their heads (or, at least eyes, in the spider's case), check a lot more suspiciously that the coast is clear, and then crawl out. They come over to where Jarlot is standing with Kanatash.

OOC: I have to go now, will Edit with more story later.
rampant

09-06-06, 08:20 PM		Satnak - Satnak so this is Caralot's family, I should be surprised, .... but I'm not.

Kanatash - how:confused:

Kithle - If the cosmosi can fear wild magic, then they should be even more afraid of ticking her off.

Michelle - ....:eek:
---------------------------------

Caralot - FINALLY!!!!

Serene - Oh your back YAy!

Caralot - quite right, now you said something about having a good canidate to perform the ceremony?
-----------------------------

KIthle - 30 gold he comes up with an overcomplicated escape plan that completely falls apart, and how is different from watching our spoony captain?
rampant

09-06-06, 09:06 PM		*FIGHT IT OUT*

MIchelle- This is a random encounter isn't it?

Porom - Yep

Elina - HYDRAS 12 o' clock

Sarah - Belts 12:05

Palom - *BIO*
urial angel of death

09-06-06, 10:01 PM		Volrath: Those fools they forgot to bring their moogle charms.

Nalfien: You have a moogle charm? All I got is this crappy charm bangle! Give it!

Volrath: No way!

*scuffle*

OOC: That was an FF6 joke for those of you that don't get it. Also how did Michelle get there?
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-06-06, 10:13 PM		C's Jarlot: So…ye be more friends o' Caralot's? :D The more the merrier!

The Spider rolled all its eyes, which, when you have at least eight, is pretty onvious.

Spider: Lay off the accent, dad. It never worked when you were a pirate, and you're retired now.

C' Jarlot: Oh, all right. :mad:

Satnak: So, if he's your dad, you must be Caralot's brother.

Spider [you'll have to imagine him gesturing a lot]: :D [as close as you can get on a spider] Names Puck. I'm a psychic chief. I'd shake hands, but…well…………Oh, wow, you guys have gourmet minds.

Michelle: Gourmet? :twitch:

Puck: J'eah. I'm a memeovore.

Satnak: So you eat ideas? And you're a psychic chief?

Puck: It's nothing like that. "Psychic chief" just means I have to do all my cooking by mind powers these days. You know, having eight legs isn't as useful as you might think.

Kanatash: So this is what wild magic does?

Teddy: The Wild Magic. It's not a pool of energy, like some people think, but a complete and undivisible whole. It's even speculated that it might be an entity of some sort.

Kithle and Kanatash stare at the teddy suspiciouly. They exchange a look.

Liam: Oh, fascinating, it sounds almost like the Weirsan generated by the Forgotten Freedom. I…don't suppose you have any notes.

Puck: :rolleyes: Oh no, not another magitechie.

Griffon: They'll be at it all through the wedding. Let's not go there, huh, Roosevelt.

Kithle and Kanatash: :bored:

C's Jarlot: Well (walking up to the griffon) that just leaves this little lady.

Griffon: How many times have I told you DON'T. CALL. ME. LITTLE. LADY!

Puck: Oooooo, someone's PMSing.

Griffon: Griffons don't PMS. I keep telling you that. I've been a griffon for, what, 6 years now?

C's Roosevelt: Are you sure? Because I remember there was this dwarf we had on board at one point, and he said griffons get testy at certain times of the month.

Griffon: I've asked Okarran numerous times, and she says…

The three siblings get into their own discussion, seemingly oblivious to the world around them.

C's Jarlot: Such smart boys.

Kithle: Hold on, hold on. Either someone developed PMS for guys on this world, or you're using two different genders to refer to the same individual. Or the her was once a him. Man, Wild Magic is just crazy.

Sassy, feminine voice: You can say that again.

FF crew: :confused:

C's Jarlot: And that would be the ship.

FF crew: :uh-huh:

Kithle: The ship…

The ship: Uh-huh.

Kithle: …is alive.

The ship: Uh-huh.

Kithle: Why am I so surprised by this? I crew on the Forgotten Freedom, chaos central, 1,001+ decks of comeplete and total oddball.

C's Jarlot: :D She's the fastest hunk of junk on Eberron. I call her the Forever Freedom.

Satnak: Fastest hunk of junk…

Kanatash: So we have Puck Jarlot, Roosevelt Jarlot, and…

C's Jarlot: She calls herself Gillamma now.

Kanatash: And that would make you, sir?

C's Jarlot: I'm Bruce Jarlot.

Kanatash: Bruce Jarlot?

C's Jarlot: Yup. Though I was nicknamed "Chuck" for some reason, during my days as a masked crimefighter in Sharn.

Kanatash: Bruce "Chuck" Jarlot?

Another voice from below: Hey, yo, Captain Sparrow dude? A little help

C's Jarlot goes over to where a rope is hanging off the side. He hoists it up. At the end is an illithid. Its wearing khaki clothes: shirt, shorts, boots. It looks around, then, seeing the group, toddles over.

Illithid: Man, that was a rush!

C's Jarlot: Glad you enjoyed it, Johnny.

Kithle: Johnny?………Oh good E.B.N.E.s. (face slap)

Johnny sees the new people, and leaps over the vigourously shakes each and every new hand.

Johnny: Hi. I'm, like, Johnny. I'm the Most Supreme Devotee and Priest-type guy of Thyrs as well as being a most extreme dude.

Kanatash: Bruce "Chuck" Jarlot Sparrow.

C' Jarlot: It was my pirate name, back in the day.

Satnak: Please don't tell me you have the nickname "Han".

C's Jarlot: Course not.

Satnak: Oh, phew.

C's Jarlot: My middle name really is Han.

Kanatash: Bruce Han "Chuck" Jarlot "Sparrow".…………At least it can't get any worse.

C's Jarlot: Okay, Forever Freedom move out!

Forever Freedom: I need someone to operate my sails. I'm not animated, just awakened.

Satnak: Wait, where do we have to go?

C's Jarlot: We've just got to pick up the crew, and some more of Caralot's guests. Look alive, boys!

Puck: Huh, what? Oh, yeah dad.

Kanatash: Hey, if all of you are here, where's Caralot's mother?

A silence comes over Bruce Jarlot. He stares off into the distance, his eyes misting up.

Bruce: I miss her already.

The FF crew is silent.

Gillamma: She's back at the Vidalis ranch with the others. She wasn't stupid enough to come along.

Kanatash: At least that explains where Caralot gets her smarts.

Bruce (idle conversation): :D You know, I once saved the life of a Dhakaani noble, and he made me an honorary samurai.

Kanatash: Samurai Bruce Han "Chuck" Jarlot "Sparrow. :twitch: No wonder I get along with Caralot so well. It's like being in Xoriat, only subtler.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-06-06, 10:19 PM		OOC: Chaos magic. By it's very nature, ANYTHING can happen. Even having Michelle in two places at once. :D She's there only as a meatshield anyway, remember?

IC:

Out of boredom, Volrath attacks a Stingrat.

*493*

*Needle Counterattack*

*Michelle used as shield*

*98*

Michelle: OW, damnit! You should be nicer to women...

Volrath: :D
Charles Phipps

09-06-06, 10:33 PM		Terra: Okay, what the HELL is going on?

Cobra Commander: I've formed an evil organization BENT on world conquest!

The Baroness: COBRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Terra: Rose, why are you wearing a hood on your face and what's with Zella dressed up in glasses and with dyed black hair?

Rose: *removes hood* Oh sorry, we're preparing for our broadcast for the surrender of the Five Nations.

Zella: Michael's already got his own look.

Michael: Ican'ttalkbehindthismetalmask.

Rose: Good work Destro. I'm glad we got you re-maled.

Terra: So THIS is what you've been investing my drug money in?

Rose: Yep, I now am the official head of the Aurrum. Except for all the other parts. Jacob Hunter has vowed to bring us in....again.

Terra: I pity for our economy.

Rose: Now go take these javelins and cut your hair short. Lisa can wield a crossbow and wear a catsuit.

Bruce Ki: ....

Terra: What's up with him?

Rose: He's mastered being an enigmatic ninja. Jaela is our cute ninja!

Jaela: Hai!

Terra: WHO ARE THE TWO GIRLS THAT YOU'RE CLAIMING ARE MY CHILDREN FROM THE FUTURE!?

Rose: Oh, they're your children from the future. I'm training them.

Terra: My children don't need training.

Rose: No, they do need protection though. From the Dragons.

Terra: I'm confused.

Rose: To be serious for one second and one second only Terra. There's a lot you don't understand about reality. Everything is governed by Dan or Destiny. The weavings of the Dragon Prophecy and the Dragon Mark's location show where heroes and men of destiny will be born. They never leave these people alone. Lisa, you, me, and even Jarlot when he was a boy were all targetted by Draconic action to either control our lives or destroy us to simple the pattern. Your children are equally going to suffer that same painful persecution.

Terra: How do...

Rose: I'm an Eldeen Reaches Bard, which means I'm part of the Druidic Orders there. Unlike you, whom focuses in just the natural side of thing, I happen to take a greater interest in the macabre. In my case, I belong to the Gatekeepers even if I'm hardly the most fanatical member. The prophecies of the Dragon relate to many released demons and horrors. It's why I took up my position here as Captain. Especially since the Prophecies of Arijani, the Dreaming Dark, and Sutekh the Demon of the Flame all were fulfilled here.

Terra: And this relates to our children how?

Rose: Sometime in the future, they KILL you.....or at least seperate you from your children. I put a contigency with a Wish spell that should ever be seperated in a permanent seeming manner from them that both would be teleported back into the past away from the Dragon's sight....at least for a time. I AM their only blood relative though so I do make it a point to look after my own.

Terra: :blink:
Kaizer_Ryu

09-06-06, 11:38 PM		Terra: But, we exist outside the Prophesy...

Rose: YOU do. They do not. At least, not yet. Thus the uncertanty as to what happens to you.

Terra: Ok, let me get this straight. The girls you are training are my children, even though they have none of the classes or abilities of the ones here already?

Rose: Yeah, well, here's the thing. I brought them back too soon, thus causing them never to leave in the first place. Think SJ and JJ. The girls you know and love will no longer grow up to be the ones I brought back, but they are still the same people.

Terra: ...you'd think I'd be used to this by now.

Rose: Indeed.

Terra: Just remember this, Rose. I will not sit idly by as my children are swept up in someone else's vision of the future. They must make the choice, but I can show them the way out. These girls are not just any children. They are MY children.

Rose: And my nieces. I am with you on this. As the focal point of the Prophesy, this ship is where it will fall.

OOC: If you can't tell, I HATE predetermination. Bugs the hell out of me to think that my life or the lives of those I care about have no purpose other than to fulfill some grand scheme. Terra's attitude on this is a direct reflection of my own.
rampant

09-06-06, 11:42 PM		Serene - Oh he's being spoony again. Who would be crazy enough to mess with Satnak's adopted nieces? Further more how could they hide from her? third Both girls attend the Island Academy neither of those two even have the girls' current abilities, well? They may well be alternate doubles, but Spoony's story doesn't even make sense by this ships standards.

-------------------------
OOC: Ok assume she says this before Kaizer's last post.
-----------------------------------------

Kithle - I love Fission don't you.

MIchelle - Maybe If I wasn't being used as a meatshield for two parties at once.

Satnak - HEY LOVEBIRDS GET A ROOM!

Kithle - :twitch:

MIchelle - :yuck:

Satnak - Hoist, and pull, and tie this here.....

The sails unfurl flawlessly and power the ship towards its destination.

Kithle - Hey learning new things over night is my schtick.

Satnak - I've been living on an airship how long?

MIchelle - We have an elemental ring.

Satnak - and a mast

Rose (using 4th wall powers) - Why can't she be this useful at home?

C's Jarlot - What a sailor that one is, there my boys is a real woman, if i wasn't married, and old...

Kanatash - You still woudn't stand a chance.

C's Jarlot - Now see here sonny, I was quite the -

Kanatash - Oh I'm sure you were, I mean she's taken.

Spider - (holding a boquet) awwwwww (boquet wilts)
rwarner3701

09-06-06, 11:50 PM		Martha heads up to the kitchen and has Sakura Jeala escort Elin back to her room so that she can recover. Entering the almost empty mess hall she sees The Crimson Quill (http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Quill) toying with his guitar. He turns it over begins to play (http://www.digitaldreamdoor.com/a-mp/r-sweetchild.html), but stops when he sees Martha walking up.

Martha: That was lovely deary but a bit to loud.

Quill: Well all the kids like loud.

Martha: Kids today... have you seen Norbaz around?

Quill: Him and Andrea where sitting here when I came in but they got up to leave fast but I can help you find them in the back.

Martha: That would be great.

Quill sets his guitar down and gets up to head in the back. Martha waits a moment before reaching down to the guitar picking it up and adjusting the shock cylinder.

Martha: (to herself) Not a bad player just needs to learn it isn't all about volume.

----
Approaching Matha's room Sakura Jeala and Elin see a small line of redshirts outside the door each holding a cup of water and a small pile of redshirts passed out just outside the door. Inside they see the line continues up to a small bar that Rum is behind dipping what passes for his hands into another of the redshirt's cups. There are a few redshirts sitting around the living room slowly sipping from their cups while Jack and Danyels are carrying another out to the door.

SJ: What is going on?

Jack: Isn't it great!!

Danyels: It turns out any food or beverage that Rum comes into contact with ends up incredibly spiked. Its like there is more alcohol than could even fit in the cups.

Jack: Finally we have found a way to save the plane of booze from constant exterminations.

One of the redshirts vomits all over the floor.

Elin: :yuck: I gotta get out of here before I do that.

SJ: You better get that cleaned up before Martha gets back.

Jack: Don't worry that is what the chili if for.

SJ and Elin head in the back room which is quite fortunate because soon the chili comes to clean up the mess. First it starts with the floor polishing it clean and then turns to the redshirt. In his inebriated state he doesn't even realize what is going on until it is to late and can barely get out a gurgle before the chili is dragging him into a corner to eat in private.
rampant

09-07-06, 01:48 AM		MCP - I don't feel so good.

Liam - Lemme take a look...Just as I thought your Inevitable nature is not adapting to Weirsan like most other things, too the workshop I figure I'll have to install converter into your core systems and perform the adaptation process manually.
----------------------------

OOC: Go nuts glaudius, the idea is just too much fun.:D
Gladius_Lucix

09-07-06, 02:05 AM		MCP - I don't feel so good.

Liam - Lemme take a look...Just as I thought your Inevitable nature is not adapting to Weirsan like most other things, too the workshop I figure I'll have to install converter into your core systems and perform the adaptation process manually.
----------------------------

OOC: Go nuts glaudius, the idea is just too much fun.:D
Wait, what sentient being is Liam installing a weirsan converter into? I think I missed that. Is it the inevitable that was sent to gather information on them?

EDIT: And, don't forget, I went with Kanatash, so I'm stuck with that crew for now.
rampant

09-07-06, 02:09 AM		OOC: Yes:D , Yes it is:D , And now you know why I must :evillaugh

Fine assume this happens when they get back, Kithle can only pull so many fissions out his wexlesclorp in one day.
Charles Phipps

09-07-06, 05:00 AM		Terra: Just remember this, Rose. I will not sit idly by as my children are swept up in someone else's vision of the future. They must make the choice, but I can show them the way out. These girls are not just any children. They are MY children.

Rose: Don't forget that Satnak's power comes from the Arm. The Arm was invented by someone for a purpose.

Serene: Uh huh Morpheus. Now is there a spoon or not?

Rose: Prophecy is always something that exists in 9/10ths generalities while the remaining 10th is made up of equal parts manipulation mixed with uncertainty principle.

Terra: Where the hell did you learn something like this?

Rose: I'm a Rogues Scholar from Morgraive.

*Ketler goes 'Ba Da Ching' on a set of drums nearby them*

Rose: In any case, the Dragon Prophecy isn't something that can ever be PERFECT because its nothing more than them using psychology and examining existing trends with magical data gathering. But they BELIEVE they can eliminate free will/chaos from the equation and render everything perfectly known....and thus controllable.

Terra: But you stopped that, you brought them back before they left.

Rose: Throwing a pebble in the river means that a few ripples will occur but that will only mean the dragons will be become more interested in making sure your kids become nothing more than their pawns. They will attempt to murder the older version of your children and then they will attempt to send your children into the future.

Terra: I won't let that happen.

Rose: Don't let your emotions control you Terra.

Terra: HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT!?

Rose: Because Jarlot told me to say it. He removed himself from the Game so he could avoid the destiny the Prophecy made for him. Did it never occur to you that while Jarlot was captain the Apocalypse nearly happened fifteen or sixteen times?

Terra: I just assumed it was because he was the worst captain of all time.

Rose: While that's true, its also because it's his 'destiny' to bring about the end of the world. The Dragons manipulated his entire life so that he could be the Avatar to do it. Aerith helped him avoid it and the price is that she may spend a century reforming.

...and the Dragons still hunt him relentlessly for brainwashing or whatever else they figure can allow them to restore the Prophecy.

Terra: So that's why....

Rose: Arijani and the Lords of Dust manipulate the Prophecy just like the Dragons do. Remember that he arranged events as well. We are not subject to the whims of fate...no...we ARE subject to the manipulations of higher powers that believe that we are theirs to dance to the strings to.

Terra: And what's your role in all of this?

Rose: I'm a Gatekeeper Terra. I'll do whatever I can to try to make sure the evils never arise again. I'll play to their prophecies if I have to or I'll defy them. The nature of neutrality....of Balance. We can't always be mindlessly defiant like you.

Terra: The Hell we can't.

Rose: Which is why you're predictable.

Terra: :twitch:

Rose: In any case, I'm going to go tell your daughters a few more secrets of the world. I'll see you all later.

Zella: What an odd bard.
urial angel of death

09-07-06, 07:22 AM		OOC: If you can't tell, I HATE predetermination. Bugs the hell out of me to think that my life or the lives of those I care about have no purpose other than to fulfill some grand scheme. Terra's attitude on this is a direct reflection of my own.

OOC: cry me a river chrono trigger player
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-07-06, 08:08 AM		OOC: If you can't tell, I HATE predetermination. Bugs the hell out of me to think that my life or the lives of those I care about have no purpose other than to fulfill some grand scheme. Terra's attitude on this is a direct reflection of my own.
OOC: Me too.

Silver: Way too much junk talk to do a commentary.

Bunny: Predetermination is bunk.

13: But you guys do manipulation all the time.

Bunny: It's not our fault no one tries to stop us.

Silver: Being a god just means being like the DM, only you don't have to give a damn about the players.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-07-06, 09:17 AM		After a few hours of travel aboard the Forever Freedom, the ship float over the fenced-in fields of a colossal ranch, nearly spanning a square mile. Down below are pens of cattle, horses, sheep, as well as more exotic creatures and their magebred varieties.

Kanatash: I'm guessing this is the Vidalis ranch you were talking about.

Bruce Jarlot: Aye.

Puck: Dad!

Bruce: Whoops, sorry. Force of habit.

The ship drifts to a stop over a patch of flattened grass near a sizable ranch mansion. The boys and Jarlot rein in the sails, and the Forever Freedom slowly settles to the ground.

Liam: Huh. Without an elemental ring an airship can land on the ground. That must be very handy.

C's Roosevelt: J'eah. House Lyrandar might be the leaders in airship magitech, but it's a shame that they're willing to sacrifice practicallity in favor of flashy stuff. Heck, even without a ring, the Forever Freedom is faster than any of them.

Liam: How can a ship pushed by the winds outrun something with its own movement source?

Liam and Roosevelt get into a huge discussion reguarding the various merits of magical vehicle design.

Meanwhile Bruce has lowered a gangway from the side of the Forever, and strides down it with Kanatash and the boys following behind.

Suddenly a shout erupts from the ranch mansion, and a round, brown and green shape comes rushing out, heading in a beeline for Bruce.

Woman's voice: Bruce Han Jarlot, you stupid, stupid man! You take my boys off on some wild crazy risky idea to try and go see Caralot while she tells you she's working on a safer way…[keeps on]

Gillamma: That would be mom.

Kanatash: Something occurs to me. You three and your sister can't be too young.

Gillamma: She's actually the youngest.

Kanatash: Right. So that should mean that if your mother is a human she's pretty old by now. But the one down there doesn't look over middle age.

Indeed, the formidable woman berating Bruce at the end of the gangway may be quite short and round, but her brown skin shows few wrinkles.

Gillamma: Well, she's never wanted to talk about her life before meeting dad. All we know is that she's from Serran, and that she worked as a combinaiton chief and ninja assasin under the code-name Darastrix Aesthyr.

Kanatash: "Dragon Lady"?

Gillamma: I think darastrix is also sometimes used to refer to a group of animals similar to dragons. You know, aloof, prideful, fastideous, graceful. Can't place it right now.

Kanatash: :twitch:

Gillamma: So she might have some sort of ancestry from the dragons. And she was on the ship when the Wild Magic hit, and look what it did to me.

Kanatash finally reaches the end of the gangway.

Bruce: Whoa, whoa, slow down deerie. (grabs Kanatash around the shoulders, again despite the incorporealness) I'd like you to meet our daughter's fiancee, Kanatash.

Darastrix looks Kanatash over with a disapproving look.

Darastrix: By Arawai, what do they feed you kids on that ship. Look, I c'n see right through him.

Kanatash: :rolleyes: That's because I'm incorporeal.

Darastrix: That's no excuse for not eating healthy. Now come inside and have some good home cookin', I just made lunch. Mawerrkan, Okarran, and Jaela are waiting for you inside.

Bruce: What about the rest of the crew?

Darastrix: I told you that if you want to hang on to them you have to stop risking their lives. They've all gone and skeedadled, and good luck finding replacements. Besides, you can run the Forever Freedom with just the family now.

Forever Freedom: Stop, you're making me blush.

C's Roosevelt: You don't have the capillaries.

Forever: Well, my wood's darkening.

Kanatash: Is the family weird, or is it just the entire world they live in. That is the question.

OOC: Nearly done with my part. I'd appreciate it if no one but Crystalforged tried anything with this world. Many things are different, and he's the only one whom I've given the important information to. (@Crystalfored: We're nearly to Mawerrkan. ;) )
Kaizer_Ryu

09-07-06, 09:55 AM		Rose: Don't forget that Satnak's power comes from the Arm. The Arm was invented by someone for a purpose.
Serene: What is this Arm he speaks of?

Terra: When she was first brought over, she was missing her left arm. It was replaced by a magical device designed to destroy Dieties. She has since regrown that arm and the Arm no longer exists. Much of her power CAME from the Arm, but she only needed it as she recovered from the battle with her sister. It was destroyed during the events that led to my shadow power awakening.

Serene: I...see. But what are you going to do? It seems both sets of your daughters are in danger.

Terra: What he said about the Prohesy is old news to me. That is why we can and will defy it. I never said anything about mindless defiance, only that I will not be manipulated into doing what they want.

Serene: How is that different?

Terra: If I did exactly what I thought they didn't want me to do, that is no better than being manipulated. Rose still treats me as the same woman I was before. Angry, spiteful, and defiant to the point of absurdity. I am more subtle now. As he shall see.

Serene: (i.h.h.) She's up to something. Something big. It's almost as if she was laughing every time he metioned the Prophecy...
rampant

09-07-06, 10:09 AM		Satnak - Hey guys no offense I got work tomorrow we need to start heading back.

KIthle - Yes I'm not in the mood to test what happens to a fission spell that ends when the halves are on seperate planes.
rwarner3701

09-07-06, 11:18 AM		Quill finds that Norbaz and Andrea are... busy. He clears his throat to give them a chance to compose themselves before Martha comes around the corner.

Martha: There you are deary, and Andrea too. You two don't need a chaparone do you?

Norbaz: :blush: I think we'll be ok.

Martha: I was hoping you could make some Wake Up Juice (http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Wake_Up_Juice).

Norbaz: For you?

Martha: Oh no for poor Elin.

Norbaz: Terra and Lisa's daughter was drinking?

Martha: No... well kinda.

Norbaz: What?

Martha: Elin is thier daughter from the future. She wasn't drinking so much as she was eating some cookies that had far to much rum in them.

Norbaz: Alright, but the Juice is a little strong it might be better to just go with some coffee.

Martha: That sounds good. Well I better get back.

Martha heads back towards her room and Quill goes back to the mess to continue practicing. Picking up his guitar Quill begins to play.

Duu du duu, duu du FSHOOM

A lightning bolt shoots out of the end of the guitar and strikes the ceiling burning a small hole to the next hallway and lighting the wood on fire. QUill rushes back into the kitchen to get some water.

----
In the hallway

Martha: Oh dear I must have turned the volume the wrong way...

----
Sa’vor stepped out of his door on the way to the hold to continue his search but something wasn't right. He glanced to the right and left but there was nothing there. With a sigh he gave up and turned down the hall disappearing down the stairs to wards the main hold.

Once he was out of sight a figure dressed in black almost at one with the shadows dropped from the ceiling and checked to ensure there was no one else around. Satisfied that there were no observers, the figure crouched to the group and slipped a small note under Sa’vor's door. Glancing around once more the figure pulled out a small ceramic tile snapped it in half and leapt in the air passing directly through the ceiling and settling in the hallway one floor up. With another check to ensure secrecy, the figure slipped back into the shadows and moved to the next room on the list. This was going to be a long day.

----
Later that day Sa'vor returned to his room and found the note lying on the floor. Picking it up he unfocused his eyes to allow him to check for any traps either magic or psionic. Finding none, he focused on the note and read it aloud as Naz'roth approached from the next room.

Sa'vor: The hamster in the underwater hen house moos at midnight.

Naz'roth: The what does huh?

Sa'vor: Just a note from a friend it seems everything is going according to plan.

Naz'roth: If you say so... Anything I need to do for this plan?

Sa’vor: More than likely, but you will be contacted when you need to know.

----
OOC: Yes Sa'vor knew the figure was there and even who it was as most of the Ubers do now or will in the near future. It is not a problem and they have all agreed to put up with the act for a short time to allow them to plan something of grave importance. Basically if they are able to detect the figure in some way they have agreed to not acknowledge it and those that can't detect it are not a problem. To maintain secrecy this figure will be delivering obscure notes to many Ubers and scum in the next week so feel free to add any encounters, or lack there of you would like with it. If you can't stand the suspense you can PM me and I can clue you in on the plot and hopefully get you to help with it.

----
On an island that can best be described as a tropical paradise a lone man sits on the beach opening his mail.

Jarlot: Oh, Klaz died what I shame I couldn’t make it back in time for the funeral. I really would have loved to be involved.

Jarlot: Let’s see pirate magazine I still haven’t gotten around to canceling… EARP magazine, new retirement community opening in the warm climate of Xen’drik…

Jarlot: You May Have Already Won 1,000,000 Gold!!!!! Yes finally some mail that is worthwhile.

Jarlot quickly open the package and begins to read about how to win the money and the other cool stuff he can get.

Jarlot: No purchase necessary, yeah right like they just give a million gold to someone who isn’t a customer. In fact I bet it is just the opposite the more you buy the better your chances. But I already get all the magazines I want where can I find a bunch of fools to sign up for subscriptions to all of these publications…
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-07-06, 02:40 PM		Jarlot: But I already get all the magazines I want where can I find a bunch of fools to sign up for subscriptions to all of these publications…
13: *sigh* I think I'd better train some new staff.
rampant

09-07-06, 04:19 PM		Klaz - I'M ..... NOT.....DEAD.......YET!
Kaizer_Ryu

09-07-06, 04:23 PM		Upon Terra and Lisa's demi-plane, a lone figure floats in the sky wreaking terrible destruction. Pillars of earth rise from the ground, only to be destroyed in a hail of fragments. Forests rise to towering heights, then fall in a blase of hellfire. Lakes form and boil away, storms tear the sky asunder. In an instant, however, all goes quiet and the plane returns to normal. Terra falls to the earth, exhausted, as Lisa appears and catches her in her arms.

Lisa: Feel any better?

Terra: *leaning her head on Lisa's shoulder* ...a little.

Lisa: *kisses her head* Do you wanna talk about it?

Terra: ...sure.

Lisa carries Terra over to the lakeside and they curl up together on the grass. Terra lays her head on Lisa's chest as Lisa strokes her hair.

Terra: It just never ends. It wasn't so bad when it was just us dealing with it, but now...

Lisa: I know. But we can only do so much for them. The Prophesy has been ongoing for millenia now. It will not simply go away because we want it to. It has little concern if the ones it enslaves are children or not.

Terra: But they're OUR children. They're not safe, and I can't do squat. I just...feel so helpless.

Lisa: We can do plenty. Though you can lead a horse to water, you cannot make it drink. We can teach them not to drink simply because they are told to. Or made to think they want to.

Terra: I just wish that I could take this burden from them. I don't want to see them suffer as we did.

Lisa: I'd be concerned if you didn't feel that way. But you are a wonderful mother to them. Never doubt that. You are loving, you listen to them with genuine interest, and you openly encourage them at every opportunity. You are strict, but you are also fair. I watch you with them, and I can't help but smile.

Terra looks up and gives Lisa a kiss. Breaking off, Lisa wipes Terra's eyes.

Lisa: You're not alone in this. Anything I can do, I will. Just ask.

Terra laughs lightly.

Terra: There is one thing you can do right now.

Lisa: Name it.

Terra: *lays her head back down* Just stay like this with me a while longer.

Lisa smiles and begins to hum softly as she continues to stroke Terra's hair.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-07-06, 05:16 PM		Klaz - I'M ..... NOT.....DEAD.......YET!
Bunny: "Yet" being the optimal word.
*********
OOC: Man, Kaizer, tell your girls that they can't treat demiplanes like that if they want it to remain stable. If you need some help battling the forces of destiny, I've got eternities of experience.

OOcat: You're only :censored:.…………………Oh, that's reaaaaaaaaal mature.

OOC: Okay, OOcat's got eternities of experience.
rampant

09-07-06, 05:36 PM		A while later

Serene - I wouldn't worry too much at this point.

Lisa - How did you get in here?

Serene - I followed you.

Terra - Why shouldn't we worry?

Serene - Even if the chains of the prophesy stretch across to the island, think who rules there. Mortals, people just like you or Satnak that simply refuse to roll over for stuff like that. The angels and fiends are repeatedly crushed, the rakshasa live in hiding, the dragons know better than to get on People's badsides.
urial angel of death

09-07-06, 06:22 PM		whole group watching Edawrd battle: Damnit!

Volrath: How is it that every single one of our winning conditions came true?

Palom: Ah well one less spoon bard in the world.

Nalfien: We'd probably better get going to the next place.

Volrath: Okay, Palom Porom make sure to show up.

both: We will.

----------

The Sarah, Elina, Nalfien, and Volrath reappear in a featureless black void.

Sarah: Where are we?

Volrath: We are in the space between realities.

Elina: Why did we come here?

Volrath: It was an accident. The world we were traveling to has two vastly different versions, and Nalfien was too stupid to specify which one.

Nalfien: I forgot that's all. Now let's get headed to the anime version.

Volrath: You mean manga version.

Nalfien: No I mean anime.

Volrath: Manga!

Nalfien: Anime!

* much shouting and violence*
rampant

09-07-06, 06:48 PM		Kithle - I wish I could take credit for this.

Michelle - This pop-corn is too salty *munch*
Gladius_Lucix

09-07-06, 07:00 PM		Roosevelt: ...and compared to the normal Stabilized Elemental Torus...

Something in Liam's backpack starts beeping.

Liam: Just a second. I have to check something.

The Micro Weirsan Converter Storage Battery that Liam brought along is almost full.

Liam: This thing should be able to hold over a year's Weirsan from the Forgotten Freedom! It's filled up in just a few hours over here!

Roosevelt: What's that?

Liam: It converts weirdness and insanity into usable energy. This place has about 3,000 times the Weirsan output of the Forgotten Freedom! I need an output for this, or some bad stuff is going to happen. SOMETHING is going to happen. I'm not sure what.
rampant

09-07-06, 07:08 PM		Satnak - Don't look at me, I failed item control miserably.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-07-06, 07:19 PM		OOC: Man, Kaizer, tell your girls that they can't treat demiplanes like that if they want it to remain stable. If you need some help battling the forces of destiny, I've got eternities of experience.
OOKaizer: It's covered. I got it reinforced against "in character" abuse.

OOcat: Ah, the deluxe package. Good choice.

OOKaizer: I don't plan on doing that often. This was just her version of going somewhere private to yell. The pocket dimensions require concentration to maintain, so she couldn't go to one of them.

OOcat: And about our offer?

OOKaizer: I'll keep it in mind. They're more frustrated that their children have been caught up in the very thing they've worked so hard to get out of.

OOcat: Fate is a jerk.
urial angel of death

09-07-06, 07:21 PM		OOC: Yes we know FATE was a jerk, but it's dead.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-07-06, 07:35 PM		OOC: Yes, yes, FATE is dead, but Fate is still alive and is still a big fat jerk. Though I can't help but notice that this thread resembles Crono Cross in at least one respect:

Game: You just gained 20 new characters that you'll never use again!

OOKaizer: :bored: Oh, joy. Now just explain to me why my main character uses an oar for a weapon and why this game is almost nothing like its predecessor.

Game: Because Crono was simply too awesome to give a worthy successor. And Square (tm) got lazy during development and production.

OOKaizer: Just like with Final Fantasy X-2?

Game: Ok, we've apologized for that on multiple occasions. The development staff was going through a tough time, what with Enix's abuse and Square's drinking problem. The entire production staff comes from broken homes. We just didn't have the heart to tell them the game sucked worse than Final Fantasy VIII.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-07-06, 07:35 PM		OOC: Yes we know FATE was a jerk, but it's dead.
Bunny: As a god of death let me tell you: that doesn't stop them.
********
This place has about 3,000 times the Weirsan output of the Forgotten Freedom!
13: Only 3,000? Must be a slow day.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-07-06, 07:38 PM		OOC Eled : "No Hu's a jerk."

all other OOCs : "Eled!"

OOC Eled : :rolleyes:

( :cookie: to the first person to get the reference. and for the rest of you? shame on you. shame on you! )
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-07-06, 07:41 PM		OOC Eled : "No Hu's a jerk."

all other OOCs : "Eled!"
OOC: Believe me, that comic is like the FF, only concentrated and better written.
********
Silver is standing on a stage in front of a microphone.

Silver: Notice how the main characters in video games don't talk that much? And yet they still get the girl. You still wanna tell me there are no gods of sex?

*laughter*

Silver: And these heroes are always so effeminate. And they still get the girl. It's like someone's trying to tell you something. :shifty: (whisper) Be a lesbian.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-07-06, 07:48 PM		ooc: I know, been folowing the FF since page one of the old thread. Great isnt it :evillaugh
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-07-06, 07:52 PM		Kithle - You know Lisa will pulverize you and Terra will skin you alive for giving their daughters the talk without them.

Volrath - I'll blame nalfein

Nalfein - HeY!

Ash, speaking in Nalfein's voice. "Relax, he won't blame you... Your going to confess to them." :evillaugh

Nalfein :eek:
Kaizer_Ryu

09-07-06, 07:59 PM		OOC: Believe me, that comic is like the FF, only concentrated and better written.
OOC: Where do you think the original inspiration for Lisa came from? And the basis for early Lisa - Michael relationships?

Lisa: That was way back when I was only one dimensional.

White Mage: I was her coach in Advanced Pervert Beatings: 101. She was my best student. Though, I may have to take a page out of her book as far as relationships go.

Black Mage: Is that any way to talk to the guy who rocked your wo-

*MASSIVE HAMMER BEATING*

Black Mage: Ow...
rampant

09-07-06, 08:04 PM		OOC : Ahhh that brings back memories, Kithle is basically thief with a better backstory.

Theif - Trademark violation!!! GO LAW NINJAS

OORampant - Runaway!
Charles Phipps

09-07-06, 08:07 PM		OOC: Sadly, Stupid as Fighter never really took off.

Rose: THE HELL WE'RE NOT BETTER WRITTEN.

Black Mage: Ah suck it up!
Kaizer_Ryu

09-07-06, 08:20 PM		OOC: I see Muradin as closer to Fighter.

IC:

Lucky: RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!!

Bolt Tooth Tony: What're ya goin' off about now?

Lucky: MURADIN FOUND THE SWORD CHUCKS!!!!

Muradin enters spinning two swords on the end of a long chain.

Muradin: Sword Chucks, yo!

B.T. Tony: :eek: :eek: :eek:
urial angel of death

09-07-06, 08:24 PM		OOC: Either Long Wang or Bruce Ki was based off blackbelt. I don't remember which. Muridan(sp) was based on fighter. Volrath was distantly based on Chainer, Volrath(from Magic the Gathering), and my vague understanding of Lovecraftian mythos. Terra was based on Terra and Kaizer's inner powergamer. (don't look at me like that. Being druid is in of itself powergaming. :P ) Satnak was based off various DBZ characters. (sorry con't tell them apart.) Nalfien was based off of Black Mage and his namesake from Homeland (distantly). Rose bears a resemblence to Edward though I don't think he was based on him. Squishy was based off the little pieces of info I gone on SpellJammer and Thief. Bob the zombie was based on Penny Arcade's zombie (only good part of the comic). We all know who V was based on. Finally there is Kanatash who is quite like Alucard though not based on him. Did I miss anyone?
Charles Phipps

09-07-06, 08:30 PM		IC:

As a note Jarlot is based on Captain Jack Sparrow and later a much older Cloud Strife.

Rose is actually based on the hero of the Princess Bride in Wesley and some Errol Flynn.

Bruce Ki is indeed based on Black Belt and other stereotypical martial artists.

Ketler is a typical anime geek.

Sakura Jaela is actually Sakura in Sakura Taesin

Andrea was based somewhat on Carmilla from Castlevania mixed with Sumire of all things. I just liked the idea of a sexy and pleasant to be around necromancer (she still ended up being a b***)

Marish is based on Lum.

Captain Jarlot Senior is of course based on Captain Murphy.

Dooj increasingly was Jayne from Firefly except gay.

***

Rose: Arm or not, it still was given with a purpose.

Zella: In any case, you need to give them credit.

Rose: I'm only worried about them.

Zella: They're big girls, they can take care of themselves.

Michael: Hey, Lisa accidentally was cloned and I married her.

Rose: Carry on.
urial angel of death

09-07-06, 08:47 PM		After much fighting Nalfien and Volrath are sitting beside eachother. Both look beat up and are nearly unconsious.

Sarah: *holding huge hammer* Now start asting like adults or I'll have to start making the decisions around here.

Volrath: Fine. Nalfien we'll go there last okay. Now take us to *shudders* the K sector.

Nalfien: You really want to go there?

Volrath: Zerglings are just the kind of disgusting cute Caralot would love. We have to get one.

Nalfien: You'll risk seeing her again just for a gift?

Volrath: Yes.

Elina: Who is she?

Nalfien: A girl your uncle used to date, but he did something very stupid.

Sarah: What was that?

Volrath: I ditched her for one of your mommies.

Elina: You and mommy :yuck:

Nalfien: Funny thing is she was a sadist and hurt him even when she was in a good mood. Now that she's really ****** I'm scared to think of what she'll do. :D
Gladius_Lucix

09-07-06, 08:51 PM		OOC: Liam is based on me. Simple as that.


13: Only 3,000? Must be a slow day.
Liam: This is a slow day? I'm glad it's taken this long, or this would be much more dangerous. I think we have maybe another hour before things start not going smooth.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-07-06, 08:53 PM		OOC: So am I the only one with original character?

The Commentary Crew is not based on anyone. (it is not just MST3K in a different form, they were characters before that)
Caralot is not based on anyone.
Word Being is not based on anyone.
Weylin is not based on anyone.
Igor is of course based on the Igors from Terry Pratchett's Discworld series.
Jaela Jarlot is not based on anyone (no, seriously).
Mendova is not based on anyone.
Roosevelt is not based on anyone.
Lady is not based on anyone. (and what is she doing in the "Not in Use" category in the wiki. Who says I'm done?)

Update: I just noticed something in Urial's signature:
"That is not dead which can eternal lie, and with strange æons even death may die." - H.P. Lovecraft

Bunny: Where do I begin?
Kaizer_Ryu

09-07-06, 09:19 PM		OOC: I think she's in there because that's the "old" version. Terra is actually a fairly original character for me. I got the name from FFVI, but not much else. I started putting more of that Terra into her character once we got Aerith and Tifa on board, simply as a joke. Any other similarities between the two is purely coincidental.

As far as you know. :P

IC:

*WHAM*

Volrath: OW!

Terra: Don't put ideas into their heads. I was never interested in you that way and you know it.

Volrath: But, there was that one ti-*WHAM*

Terra: *angry pom* I told you never to mention that again!

Nalfein: How are you here?

Terra: My entity though it'd be funny, so he sent me here for a bit.

Volrath: *on the ground* Your entity is a bastard.

Terra: With all he's put me through, including all the glimpses I've caught of the things he's going to put me through...yes, yes he is. Just remember, you need to bring them back soon. They have school in the morning.

Sarah: But I wanna see Zerglings!

Elina: And I wanna meet Uncle Volrath's ex-girlfriend!

Terra: *groan* You're gonna go see her?

Volrath: Not if I can help it.

OOKaizer: Hey, time's up.

Terra: Already?

OOKaizer: I'm done typing.

Terra returns to the FF in a puff of narrative element.
Crystalforged

09-07-06, 09:39 PM		Actually you're not alone Silver, Crystal is based on nothing unless you want to count annoying valleygirls as something to be based on.

Kanatash isn't really based on anything else either. However there could be a bit of debate on that. It's rather confusing you see, I can't tell whether Kanatash is based on the voice in my head or if the voice in my head is based on Kanatash.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-07-06, 09:51 PM		It's rather confusing you see, I can't tell whether Kanatash is based on the voice in my head or if the voice in my head is based on Kanatash.
OOC: That's an easy one for me: I have no head to have voices in. :D
Kaizer_Ryu

09-07-06, 09:55 PM		I just realized that I have two, undisputably original characters in this thread. Sarah and Elina. I based them on nothing other than what I thought would be the result of being raised by Terra and Lisa. And how children would react to being CR 6 when they were born. :D

And for some reason, Crystalforged, when you first introduced Crystal, all I could think about is Sue from Grandia. They're far, FAR more annoying than she was, but similar none the less.
rampant

09-07-06, 10:21 PM		OOC: Chalky, i dare you people to claim chalky is unoriginal, regardless of accuracy he eats your liver. Also I'd like to think Satnak is few notches above Goku, in every conceivable way, and most of the inconcievable ones. Especialy when it comes to dealing with super-villians.
---------------------------

Satnak - Listen guys I gotta get back.

Liam - :lightbulb

Satnak rips open a hole in space time whith her usual finesse (i.e. none at all). And pops through.

Liam - Lets try this, My converter can stabalize the rift for our use and convert any excess wild magic into Wiersan, during the trip, just give me a moment ....(fiddles with device) .... there. *click on* Lets go people.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-07-06, 10:29 PM		OOC: Chalky, i dare you people to claim chalky is unoriginal, regardless of accuracy he eats your liver. Also I'd like to think Satnak is few notches above Goku, in every conceivable way, and most of the inconcievable ones. Especialy when it comes to dealing with super-villians.
OOC: I agree Chalky is most definitely original. I just wish he was around more. As far as Satnak, she WAS like the cast of DBZ (sans the flashy posturing and three episodes of yelling to do one attack), but with her new, expanded personality, she contains more storyline in a single post than the entire condensed plot of DBZ. Not hard, admittedly, but I'm still glad she's become more than just "Hulk smash". :D
urial angel of death

09-07-06, 11:11 PM		OOC: Of course Satnak is above Goku. She is a woman after all.

IC: The group appears in a blasted wasteland next to a sea of mamga and ash.

Volrath: There should be a hive around here somewhere. We just need to get out before-

voice: Why hello Volrath.

Volrath: ****!

voice: Look who dragged their sorry ass back after all this time. Thanks to those sacrifices she might even be willing to take you back.

Volrath: What sacrifices?

voice: Oh the girls aren't. Pity they aren't. They have the necisary residue psionics and an almost perfect gene combination. Sister would have been very pleased.

Sarah: Look here.. um what's your name?

voice: I was never given a name everyone just calls me Cerebrate, and considering rarely few besides me are left it doesn't really matter.

Sarah: Well then Cerebrate. We just want to get one zergling. You or who ever Volrath ****** off can hurt him all they like, but my sister, Nalfien, and I just want to get a zergling and get out of here.

Cerebrate: Fair enough. Oh Kerrigan Volrath is here!

Volrath: *gulp*

A green skinned woman with bony appendages that look to have once sported wings runs toward Volrath. Sarh and Elina go over to a spawning pool and try to pick out a zergling.

Sarah: How about this one?
-------
Volrath: Oh gods the pain.
-------
Elina: Too orange.
-------
Volrath: Anything but that anything.
-------
Elina: This one?
------
Volrath: Okay that pain is far worse go back to the first one please.
-------
Sarah: No, how about the one with yellow eyes.
-------
Volrath: Ooooo that feels good.
-------
Elina: Sure it's so cute.
-------
Volrath: Okay now you get to the painful part.

Nalfien:I didn't know that someone's spine could bend that
rampant

09-07-06, 11:13 PM		Satnak - I'm back.

Serene - YippeE!*hug*

Satnak - I gotta get some sleep for tomorrow.

Serene - AWWWwwwwwwwww:bigeyes:

Satnak - Alright, but not too long I gotta sleep.
----------------------------

OOC: I'll leave the rest of that Group to Liam, silvercat, and Crystalforged
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-08-06, 08:01 AM		13: Sorry, Liam, the only amount of Weirsan in any universe massive enough to do the job won't fit in any container you've got.

Liam: :( Awwwwww.

13: Anyway, the E.B.N.E.'s got three more characters to introduce before we go back.

Inside the ranch mansion is quite cozy for such a large building. It basically feels like a bunch of houses with the insides connected together and made to feel like one building. Darastrix leads the group along a few corridors until they get to a small dining room. There are already two hybrid werewolves there, their coats grey with black highlights. The male has a ponytail of dull blong hair, while the female has her bright golden hair cut short to the line of her chin (if she was humanoid, that it). They both sport fur patterns that resemble dragonmarks, on the male's throught and the female's stomach. The third person is a half-elf with dark hair and flamic-style robes.

Kanatash: (ihh: I suppose that makes sense. Jarlot is Jaela's father in our Eberron, so Caralot would be—)

Jaela: Oh, grandad, you're back.

Bruce: And I brought a surprise with me. (slaps Kanatash hard on the back) :D This is Kanatash.

The female werewolf looks up, and studies Kanatash with a curious expression.

Female were: Based on her description, I would have thought you'd be more………………

Kanatash: Freaky? :devil:

Female were: Exactly.

Kanatash: (ihh: :devil:…………:confused: She's dissapointed? At least I can read her mind, but she's dissapointed? :( Apprently this multiverse really is insane.)

The female were then stood straight, her tail up and her ears perked, almost as if she had to assert superiority over the others.

Female were: I am Okarran d'Vidalis. (she gestured to Jaela) This is my daughter, Jaela d'Vidalis.

Jaela: Keeper of the Silver Flame. (bows low)

Kanatash: (ihh: Daughter. And Caralot's another parent. Okay, that's not so unusual aboard the FF: there's Terra and Lisa, Saberiel and Aerith.……………… And Caralot does have that "extra feature".) :D Nice to meet you. So you two are friends of Caralot?

At the metion of the phrase "friends of Caralot", a memory jumped into the mind of the male were: (flashback)
Caralot: I thought wolves were monogamous?

Male were (self-identified as Mawerrkan d'Vidalis, brother of Okarran): Heh, screw genetics.

Caralot: Hey, :D genetics will have to wait in line.

[guess]
(unflash)
Mawerrkan: I am Mawerrkan d'Vidalis.

Kanatash: (ihh: …………………………) Hi.

Darastrix: Enough, enough! I know the food's getting cold, so let's continue all this over a hot lunch.

OOC: Okay Crystalforged, this is Kanatash's moment to ask about the family without Caralot being there. Shoot me some questions that I can answer.
rampant

09-08-06, 10:49 AM		C's Jarlot - Whered that Satnak Girl dash off to?

Kithle - Her schedule has recently become rather busy, she needed to get back home to prepare for work.
-----------------------------

Satnak - zzz

Serene - *sigh* why am I always dragging her sleepy butt around?

Caralot - Narcolepsy?
rampant

09-08-06, 01:15 PM		Second day (this is why I had to pull satnak I'm an impatient jerk)

Berserk 101:

Sarah - oh come on Why am I in this class? 101 really *hmph*

Random Shifter Kid - because you either cannot trigger your transformation at will, or cannot control the state once you enter, or some combination of the 2.

Sarah - And what would you know about it?

Bezen - I know that I can't control Vorashis once I let it out.

Sarah - Whats a Vorashis?

Bezen - :twitch: the angel of Light.
-------------------------

Energitic re-enforcement

(everyone is sitting on their knees in a mediditative pose)

Gilligag - Ok breathe in and out slowly, today we will work on opening the inner sight so we can see what we're doing.

Elina - (i.h.h. this would be alot easier if I hadn't gotten stuck next to the burning incense)

Tirmek - ...zzz...
---------------------------

Beast Training

Kratwe - While we acquire the beasts for you guys, you will care for these critters.

Tirmek - anyone but-

Kratwe - Tirmek you get Rosey

Tirmek - crud

Later

Tirmek is being dragged behind a five headed hydra with blue face markings.

Tirmek - HOW DO YOU STOP THIS CRAZY THING?!?!?

Elina - (brushing a racoon) HAHAHAHA
rwarner3701

09-08-06, 04:30 PM		Martha gets back to her room and finds the drunken redshirts and the booze elementals.

Martha: Out all of you out right this instant. You say you just want to make cookies and then Elin gets drunk. Next thing I know you turn my room into a bar!!

Jack: We can explain.

Martha: No you are nothing but a bunch of good for nothings. I need to pack my things I am leaving this ship.

Danyels: Wait, we won't do it again we promise.

Martha: No I can't trust you as soon as I am packed I am getting off this no good hive of villany.

Jack, Danyels, Rum, and Chili push the redshirts out and then laeve themselves. Martha heads back into her bedroom and finds Sakura Jeala and Elin.

SJ: I heard yelling what is going on?

Martha: I just realized this ship is no place for me and I'm leaving.

Elin: (looking much better) Oh, I'm sorry to hear that Martha I guess I should thank you for the sweater now.

Martha: But I haven't even finished it yet.

Elin: I know, but you will and then you'll give it to Elina, and since I'm from the future...

Martha: Oh... ok. Your welcome deary.

Elin: You'll have to send us a letter when you get off the ship and we'll come visit sometime.

SJ: Yes it was good to spend time with you.

Martha: Oh you two are so sweet. It'll be the first thing I do when I get back home.

Elin: Good. We'll go now give you some time to pack.

Elin and Sakura Jeala head out the door and Martha begins to pack. She comes upon the sweater and a half that she was working on and decides to finish them first.

Martha: Well if she gets them eventually I might as well get back to work on this first.

Martha finishes the sweater and gets up.

Martha: Now before I started I was doing something... What was it?

Martha looks around and spots some more yarn sitting on the table.

Martha: Oh yes another present for the girls.

----
Out in the hallway

Sakura Jeala: I thought you were from the past of the Sarah and Elina from this plane.

Elin: I am but she won't figure that out.

SJ: What's the point she'll just leave once she finishes.

Elin: No, she will forget all about it once she gets lost in working on them.

SJ: Really?

Elin: How else do you think she has stayed on the ship this long?

----
Darian is still standing in the halls spreading the word to the unfortunate redshirts who have yet to see the light.

OOrwarner: I need you to do something Darian.

Darian: Who is that?

OOrwarner: Umm... me, I guess I'm your new entity.

Darian: Oh yes the one who saved me from Rose's purge. (turning to the redshirts) See here this powerful being saved me just before Rose purged many of the lesser used crew members and he can do the same for you.

OOrwarner: Don't worry about that now I need you to get some crew and Jarlot Senior then borrow the Forgotten Freedom 2.

Darian: Why?

OOrwarner: Because I said so, and because you are supposed to be pirates and I have found a town for you to raid.

Darian: Of course my lord. (turning back to redshirts) Do you hear that we have a chance to prove our worth to the entities and each of you could gain a name who is with me.

Crowd: ...

Darian: An equal share of loot for each of you.

Crowd: :cheer: :clap: Lets go.

The crowd rushes off to prepare.

Darian: Where are we going?

...

Darian: Hello?

OOrwarner: Sorry got distracted. You are going to the small island by Xen'drik.
rampant

09-08-06, 05:07 PM		Literature -

Elina - Is this more weight training? uhg
(struggles with a massive set of tomes)

--------------------

Mathematics -

Tirmek - YAWN this is easy.

--------------------

Strategy

Tirmek - I call xendrick

Sarah - You always call xendrick

Elina - its easy to defend

(Accross a massive risk board)
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-08-06, 06:30 PM		Silver: Notify me when those kids get to adolescence.

Bunny: You know, I don't think so. Because Terra and Lisa can't kill you, so I don't get anything out of it.

Silver: Wonder if I could get Caralot's help on getting Sarah and Tirmek together by tempting her with the monster combo their kids are going to make up.

Bunny: I think they're more likely to become rivals.

Silver: Ooooooooo! :D

Bunny: :banghead:
Crystalforged

09-08-06, 06:54 PM		OOC: Sorry bout the wait here, I've been busy and frankly pinned under a massive writers block. Anywho...



IC: Kanatash: So, yet another Jaela? That makes what now, four?

Jaela: That many?

Kanatash: Yes the entity's had an unhealthy fascination with Jaela's since the begining and it seems it's never gone away, only gotten more subtle. Back on my version of the Forgotten Freedom we have Sakura Jaela who is the daughter of Jarlot, pontif of the silver flame, and a magical girl. Then there's Jaela Jarlot who is Sakura Jaela from a different dimension where the silver flame does not exist and Batman. Finally there is Ninja Jaela #26 who is the last surviving of the line of ninja Jaela's created by Kelter, Jarlot's adoptive son.

Jaela: That seems rather bizzare.

Kanatash: It is, but the really creepy part is AFTER the age of about 18 the crew suddenly loses interest in them.

Jaela: ...You know I'm having second thought about going on this ship of yours.

Kanatash: It's not that bad, there were a lot of hair brained scemes but nothing ever came of them. We have paladin with a pervert-bane warhammer on board and a few other who'll keep them in line. The only one you really need to worry about anyways is Kelter, he's the most obsessed and he can't go after the other three because two are related to him and the third will kill him in the night if he tries anything.

(awkward silence)

Kanatash: So... How do you three know Caralot anyway?

Mawerrkan: Oh, well Caralot and I "dated" back when we were in the acadamy together. We "got to know each other" very well. Later when she started creating "enhancements" for herself I introduced her to my sister, Okarran, here.

Okarran: As my brother put it we "got to know each other" as well and I ended up becoming pregnant with Jaela here.

Kanatash: Hold on there. You're Caralot's daughter?

Jaela: Yes.

Kanatash: :twitch:

Kithle: (sticking his head in) Ooooooh, that's not good. Last time I saw that face was with Krozen.

Jaela: You mean Cardinal Krozen?

Kithle: Yeah, in our dimension, he's the father of that hammer wielding Paladin he mention earlier and we'll just say the skumbag "loved her very much." Aparently Kanatash doesn't like pedaphiles since he, how do you say it, enforced Karma and then some.

Weres: :mymy:

Kanatash: :twitch: I think I need to have a "little" discussion with my fiancee when I get back...
rampant

09-08-06, 07:09 PM		OORampant - Burrrrrrrrrrrrrrned,:cheer: :dancin: :evillaugh :clap: :w00t: in your face ghost boy!!

Kanatash - I take it you enjoy my suffering then.

OORampant - Yes very much so.

Kanatash - ... Just so we're clear.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-08-06, 07:54 PM		Kithle: Yeah, in our dimension, he's the father of that hammer wielding Paladin he mention earlier and we'll just say the skumbag "loved her very much." Aparently Kanatash doesn't like pedaphiles since he, how do you say it, enforced Karma and then some.

Weres: :mymy:
Mawerrkan: That doesn't sound like uncle-cousin Krozen at all.

Okarran: Is everyone in your dimension warped and twisted?

Kithle: :blink: ……………………Hold on. You're related to Krozen? (ihh: They don't seem the slightest bit bothered by Kanatash. :confused: )

Mawerrkan: He's the only openly were Cardinal. Sure, he hid his heritage for a long time, but now that Jaela came out with her heritage he's more confident about his position.

Okarran: Krozen helped hide Jaela when……………

Okarran lowers her head with a look of great shame.

Jaela reaches over to give her mother's hand a squeeze.

Jaela: It's okay, mom, I've forgiven you. You were young, you weren't ready.

Kanatash, Kithle, Liam: :confused:

Jaela: *puff* It was an accident that Caralot's "enhancement" was fertile. She was just starting out with that sort of stuff at the time.

Kithle: So not only are you Caralot's daughter, you were unplanned.

Kanatash: :twitch: (ihh: Why didn't she mention any of this? Does she not even care?)

Kithle: *telepathically: You certainly married an interesting woman. :D*

Mawerrkan: Caralot is crazy. I don't mean it in a bad way, she just sees everything differently. I can remember the stir she made when she invited a beholder to the ranch, then told it that she was hoping to "introduce" it to an awakened horse.

Kithle: Yep, that's Caralot. :bored:
urial angel of death

09-08-06, 08:27 PM		Kerrigan is sitting on Volrath. While he has no cuts left from it due to his regeneration, his bones have been rearranged so that he resembles a gross mockery of a throne. Nalfien though physically unharmed, is quivering as he fills his role as a foot rest. Elina and Sarah are sitting in front of her listening intently.

Kerrigan: Their you go girls I have tought you everything I know about manipulation, combat, and leadership. Just remeber that men are horny, selfish, stupid, rash, and above all else cowards if you remember this you can get them to do anything you want with little or no effort. Also remeber that women theoreticaly two fifths better than men because they are not as horny or cowardly. This makes them harder to control. Do not try to manipulate a female rival, kill her.

Sarah: Yes ma'am. :schemes:

Elina: But killing is wrong.

Bony spines rip through Kerrigan's stomach and chest. They belong to Volrath.

Volrath: Most of the time that is true little Elina.

His spines all pull in different directions at once shredding Kerrigan's torso.

Volrath: But in certain cases it is the only acceptable path.

Volrath bones all pull from their sockets with a sickening *pop*. They then crawl around under his skin until they are in the usual human skeletal frame.

Elina: You killed her?

Volrath: No her brother will regenerate her soon, but we'll be gone by then. My entity would erase me from existance if I got rid of any possibility of a new Starcraft game. Nalfien you ready to make the next hop?

Nalfien: Am I ever *shudder*.

The world around them begins to fade...
Kaizer_Ryu

09-08-06, 09:29 PM		Also remeber that women are naive, emotional, physically weak, far to trusting, and vengeful. Do not try to manipulate a female rival, kill her.
*WHACK*

OOUrial: OW!

OOKaizer: WHAT UNIVERSE ARE YOU FROM, ANYWAY?!

OOUrial: *innocently* What?

OOKaizer: The women on the ship are the strongest, most cunning members of the crew, man! Emotional and Vengeful aren't gender specific traits, either! Don't forget that they're females, too. Are you trying to confuse them, or something?

OOUrial: Yes. :P
urial angel of death

09-08-06, 09:45 PM		OOC: It was only a generalization like me her saying that men are horny, selfish, stupid, rash, and cowardly. I'm only three of those and you are only four. :P Still even so her advise still stands trying to manipulate a woman will get you in a load of trouble so kill them. Also I'm not trying to state my views. I'm stating what she learned from experience. The only females Kerrigan ever truely met were other ghost children, her mother, Rasagal, and that one telepath she captured. Now that I think of it weak I should probably take out.

Also you have to admit girls hold grudges longer than guys.
urial angel of death

09-08-06, 09:48 PM		OOC: Okay I'll change it.
rampant

09-08-06, 09:50 PM		OORampant - YES!!

Also for the sake of what little internal consistancy there is I'm gonna just state that "school" scenes should just be assumed to be taking place where ever it is most logical timeline wise, rather than their position in the actual thread.
--------------------------------------------------------

13 - Someone's screwing with time again:mad:

Bunny - You mean more so than usual?:bored:

-------------------------------------------------------

Late evening on the Island

Tirmek - HEEEEEELLLLLLLLLP!!

Yes Rosey is still dragging him all over the place.
urial angel of death

09-08-06, 09:58 PM		OOC: I editted it. Hopefully now it comes off as more of a pesimist view of the humaniod races insted of sounding sexist.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-08-06, 10:13 PM		OOC: I was giving you crap, urial. I know you'd never be serious about sexist remarks. It just seemed odd that a woman (or what used to be one) was telling other, smaller women the they were strong and weak in the same breath.

But yes, I know for a fact that women usually hold grudges longer than guys. But that's only because we're so distractab- OOOOO, SHINY! :D
urial angel of death

09-08-06, 10:32 PM		OOC: It no longer considers itself to have any human qualities left except for a pretty face and the memories of those that knew the old her.
Paulon

09-08-06, 10:39 PM		Sounds like she'd fit in on the Forgotten Freedom then. :-P
Charles Phipps

09-08-06, 11:20 PM		Rose: I wonder which of the crew...me or Doog, is the worse male stereotype.

Marish: I'm a huge *****!

Andrea: Your lives mean nothing to me puny males.

Aerith: I'm untouchable and virginal.

*they all burst out laughing*
rampant

09-08-06, 11:23 PM		OOC: And Might I add DEAD.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-08-06, 11:47 PM		OOC: And Might I add DEAD.
OOKaizer: That's COLD, rampant.

Terra: You made me into what amounts to a guy in a woman's body.

OOKaizer: No, I made you into the stereotypical lesbian. At least by gamer standards.

Terra: Meaning incredibly hot, untouchable, and oversexed.

OOKaizer: Plus you've got tentacles.

Terra: *sigh* You need to get out more.
rampant

09-09-06, 12:29 AM		OORampant - Thats what happens when my sense of levity goes on vacation, DAMN YOU SEPHIROTH!!!
rampant

09-09-06, 02:08 AM		OOC: Interesting thought

Kithle vs. Raistlin

Satnak vs. Thor norse god of thunder (not the comic character)

Spoony vs. Gilbert/Edward

Nalfein vs. Mordekainen

Sa'vor vs. Dante (DMC)

Terra vs. Dr. (or was it Mr.) Fate
Crystalforged

09-09-06, 03:01 AM		Satnak vs. Thor norse god of thunder (not the comic character)
I'm not familiar enough with the other guys you named to really make a call but this one seems pretty cut and dry. After all you've got a GOD up against someone known as the DEICIDE. So yeah... :rolleyes:
rampant

09-09-06, 03:13 AM		OOC: I know that was easy, I should clarify, How badly would she humilate him?
Paulon

09-09-06, 03:44 AM		OOC: Interesting thought

Don't know them all, but

Kithle vs. Raistlin

Kithle after using his remote brain eating toys: BURP!

Satnak vs. Thor norse god of thunder (not the comic character)

Someone gets beaten to jellified death with his own hammer, then is served up as soup by Norbaz.

Nalfein vs. Mordekainen

Depends on whether Nalfein manages to set up a couple of zillion delayed blast fireballs beforehand, and on if they go off before Mordenkainen uses a disjunction on them.

Terra vs. Dr. (or was it Mr.) Fate

Dr Fate. Hard to tell - but Terra would probably be sneakier
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-09-06, 02:27 PM		OOcat: You might be the cultists of any evil god if… (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=698057)

Bunny: Not bad, not bad at all.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-09-06, 07:08 PM		OOC: Ok, finally got around to this. This is only part one. I'll be doing bits of it here and there. I just hope Dramadas (Inevitable of those who are Overly Dramatic) doesn't come after me for this. I think we need an Inevitables section of the Wiki to keep track of them. They try so hard, they deserve at least some mention. :D

IC:

Terra and Lisa sit in their room within the Forgotten Freedom. The ghostly image of Rose and Terra's mother, Laurel, floats before them.

Laurel: It's wonderful to see you again, Lana.

Terra: I'm happy to see you too, but my name isn't Lana anymore.

Laurel: Oh! Right, sorry. Rose called you Terra, right?

Terra: *nods* I only remembered the name you gave me a few years ago. I decided to keep this one, since it's all I knew for so long.

Laurel: I understand. But would you introduce me to this beautiful young lady?

Lisa: I'm Lisa, your daughter-in-law. :)

Laurel: :confused: Daughter-in-...? Is Haru with you?

Terra: *sadly* My brother is dead. He attacked me some time ago, and I killed him myself.

Laurel: So he never recovered... But if it's not Haru, how are you my daughter-in-law?

Terra: She's my wife.

Laurel: :blink:

Lisa: Is that...ok?

Laurel: Y-yes. I was just surprised is all. I was hoping for grandchildren, but I guess I'll have to wait for Rose on that one.

Lisa: Actually, there's no waiting required, ma'am. ;)

Laurel: :mymy:

Terra: We have two daughters. They're at school right now, so we'll bring them to meet you later.

Laurel: ...really? But...how? Wait, don't tell me. I'm not sure I want to know.

Terra: Probably not. But I think you'll like them. :)

Laurel: Before I do, I'd like to catch up with my daughter first. Rose only told me a little, but it seems you've been rather busy since I...well... *looks down in shame*

Terra: You did what you thought was right. If you hadn't, who knows what would have happened. I may very well have become the destroyer of this world.

Laurel: What about Theronas? And your father?

Terra: Both dead. They tried to take me back, but they have been destroyed. They will never return. Both their souls are gone.

Laurel: *sigh* That puts my mind at ease. Finally, your father can rest in peace...

Lisa: What happened to him? Captain Jarlot described an almost completely different person.

Laurel: That's a long story, one for another time. Tell me about you two, first. I want our first meeting to be a happy one.

With a smile, the three spend the rest of the afternoon in conversation.
Gladius_Lucix

09-09-06, 08:53 PM		Liam: Okay, it's too late to try and vent the Weirsan. We just gotta hope that nothing extremely bad happens. Now, please excuse me while I get this to a safe distance.

Liam grabs the battery, and runs out the door.

*FER-WALP-A-DOODLE-DOO!*

Liam walks back in and falls into a chair, apparently unharmed.

Liam: Well. That was interesting. The terminals of the Weirsan Battery ARCED, releasing pure Weirsan energy. It manifested physically, and there's a giant. pink-and-purple-polka-dotted, sentient Duck out there, calling me "Mommy."

Giant Duck: Mommy? Where did Mommy go?
Kaizer_Ryu

09-09-06, 09:19 PM		:heehee :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

That is, quite possibly, the funniest thing that has happened so far on this thread. Kudos to you, Gladius.
Crystalforged

09-09-06, 09:34 PM		And the award for best use of font colors in a post goes to...






:cheer: Gladius_Lucix!!! :cheer:

:clap: :clap: :clap:

Here's your award. :turkey: Carry it with pride.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-09-06, 10:02 PM		Liam: Well. That was interesting. The terminals of the Weirsan Battery ARCED, releasing pure Weirsan energy. It manifested physically, and there's a giant. pink-and-purple-polka-dotted, sentient Duck out there, calling me "Mommy."

Giant Duck: Mommy? Where did Mommy go?
OOcat: Great, now I have a giant duck I've gotta name.

Liam: I have a question.

OOcat: That's why I brought you here.

Liam: How come this multiverse has so much Weirsan in it?

OOcat: I'm one of those weizened mentors that adopts fringe, shunned, abused ideas that really just need love and turns them into original viable concepts. In this multiverse they aren't considered any more weird than some of the "normal" ideas from yours. It just happens that this entire multiverse is made up of mostly them, so your Weirsan battery interprets this as the most massive form of its energy ever discovered.

Liam: :mymy:

Kithle: It sounds a lot like the Forgotten Freedom: we take in the random weirdoes and turn out polished insane weirdoes.
rampant

09-09-06, 10:56 PM		Serene - How about Elina and Sarah as the flower girl and ringbearer.

Caralot - Hmmm, good Idea.

Satnak - Norbaz has his catalouge ready, he wants to know what kind of cake and catering we'll need.
rwarner3701

09-10-06, 02:12 AM		Darian: Find a crew, find a crew...

Squishy: For what?

Darian: A pirate mission to Xen'drik.

Squishy: I'll go, need to get away from Chalky for a few days anyway.

Darian: Great head to the FF2.

----
Sara: No one loves me its always all about Elin and she can't even cast spells.

Ash: (standing behind her) What kind of spells can you cast?

Sara: AHHH!! Spells like these. *Greater Fireburst*

Ash deftly dodges out of the way landing a 10 feet back with a smile on his face.

Ash: Impressive display of power for one so young.

Sara: What do you want?

Ash: Just to give you the attention that such a powerful girl deserves.

Sara: Really?

Ash: Yep follow me and you can meet Aurixirthos.

----
Ash and Sara finally find Aurixirthos on the deck standing over a large barbacue grill.

Ash: Aurixirthos I have someone here for you to meet.

Aurixirthos: (turning around) Oooo is she for the cookbook? I have some sweet and sour sauce around here someplace.

Sara: WHAT!?!

Ash: No nothing like that she was just showing me how much she likes fire.

Aurixirthos: Is that so and why should we care?

Ash: Well Darian is planning a pirate raid and I figure the three of us could tag along.

Aurixirthos: Fire and treasure in the same day sounds promising.

Sara: Yes I finally get to do something.

----
On the deck of the Forgotten Freedom 2 Darian has gathered some new crew members along with some of the old rejects.

Bolt-Tooth Tony: Are ye daft? I hav'n been forgotten ah just been layin' low.

Jarlot Senior: Enough talk we have some work to get to this ship won't sail itself.

Darian: Aren't you the captian?

Jarlot Senior: I can't be expected to do everything. I'll be in my cabin when you need me.

Darian: Umm...

Sara: Don't worry I can do it. *Charm Monster*

Aurixirthos: I thought you said she was all about fire.

Ash: A little versatility is never a bad thing.

Darian: Excelent we leave in the morning.



OOC: If anyone else wants to go along feel free to add them in.
cypher_zero

09-10-06, 02:44 AM		Terrek flies over to the deck of the FF2 and lands dramatically in the middle with his wings spread, crouched low to the ground. He rises slowly, folding his wings around him and peering around darkly.

(mutters from crew) Show off...

Terrek: *uber-glare*

Darian: Gah! I thought only Satnak could do that!

Terrek: Actually, most of the ubers have mastered the Uber-Glare. Satnak however, has move up to the "Ninja-Glare (See *NOTE*)." Anyways, there will undoubtedly be much slaying of living things, and I need a few more souls for something I'm working on, so I thought I'd tag along. I'll be below deck plotting ominously if anyone needs me.

(*NOTE*: Cypher's ranking system for things: neat, good, great, sweet, awesome, crazy, Uber, Ninja. Ninja is the highest. Because Ninja rule. There might be more in there, but Ninja trumps all.)
.
rampant

09-10-06, 03:21 AM		OOC: Nope thats febreeze, your thinking of.
cypher_zero

09-10-06, 03:26 AM		OOC: Actually, no. Any good Ninja is always prepared (at least when solo. See the Wikipedia entry about the "Inverse Ninja Rule"), and so should at all times have a bottle of febreeze. So you see a *good* Ninja really does trump all. As long as it's only one ninja.
.
Gladius_Lucix

09-10-06, 08:22 AM		:heehee :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

That is, quite possibly, the funniest thing that has happened so far on this thread. Kudos to you, Gladius.

And the award for best use of font colors in a post goes to...






:cheer: Gladius_Lucix!!! :cheer:

:clap: :clap: :clap:

Here's your award. :turkey: Carry it with pride.
Thank you, thank you. *takes a bow* I plan on a few more Weirsan Arcs before we get back. I hope they all measure up.

And a note: The duck was created from the weirsan energy, not summoned. Just so you know.
Lord Kale Fangblade

09-10-06, 09:57 AM		Terra and Lisa sit in their rooms, when a horrible splintering sound anounces the arrivle of Sa'vor as he crashes through the cieling. He lands with a sickening crack his eyes are shut and not a muscel moves. Terra walks over to him cautiously, His eyes Snap open. Sa'vor pulls himself to his feet, blood dripping from several wrents in his armour.

Terra: Sa'vor whats going on?

Sa'vor: No time. Get out now.

before Terra could answer the Creature dropped through the cileing, it swung a large serrated claw and Sa'vors head. he ducked and drove his mindblade into its side.

Sa'vor: * while avioding the creatures claws* Both of you, get out now, retreat. Warn the others.

The creature's claw smashes into him knocking him through one of the walls. it follows him with a bestial roar charging through the wall in a shower of splinters, Sa'vor unleashed an eldritch blast that merely fizzled and faded as it hit the creatures hide. the creature caught him with an upercut scything through the armour plates protecting his chest, searing pain spread across the whole of Sa'vors body, Pain obscured all rational thought. the anger flared within him, the hatred, the pure rage that burned beneath his skin. another blow from the creature knocked him through yet another wall.

Sa'vor rose his bones sliding back into place and his eyes locked with the creature, it was powerful yes. and its controler had failed the first time. he felt the rage coursing beneath his skin, he manifested his scythe.
It roared and faced him down. Sa'vor put on a defensive stance, it did the same. he knew he couldnt beat it on its own. Somehow it had escaped. it had left Naz'roth in a puddle of his own blood. it had destroyed four regiments of Half-Dragons despite his best efforts. Feal-Thas was still recovering, Slip was unconcious, Tara was rallying the troops.

All he had to do was hold it off for just long enough. It charged, he ducked under its first attack and brought his scythe up into the weak point in the arm joints. It roared in pain and swatted him away like he was an insect. Sa'vor was sent sprawling across the floor, his ears ringing. He rose again, and felt the power crackling beneath his flesh and between his fingers. if he couldnt directly strike it .... Sa'vor unleashed a concentrated bolt at the weak point beneath its feet. the floor boards buckled and it fell through the floor.

Sa'vor followed it. it would kill everything in its path until it found him. he had to buy the others some time...
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-10-06, 10:32 AM		Sa'vor followed it. it would kill everything in its path until it found him. he had to buy the others some time...
OOC: Anything we can do to help, or is this just your own personal battle?

Bunny: Because it's getting really boring.
*******
Satnak - Norbaz has his catalouge ready, he wants to know what kind of cake and catering we'll need.
Caralot: I was actually thinking Greyfeline would do the cake. Did such a good job at Terra and Lisa's wedding. And then there's Erk's Place for the catering, because they have a larger staff.

Satnak: I'm not so sure about Erk's Place. They were still wearing costumes the last time I checked.

Caralot: No need to worry. It's all been fixed.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-10-06, 10:51 AM		Ash: A little versatility is never a bad thing.


( OOC: rwarner intentionaly or not thats actualy a perfect Ash coment. He may play up the Pyrokenetic, but tahts to help people forget hes traned as both Egotist and Rogue. Only coment is he should realy come off more aristocratic and old world, but thats minor detail. Nice to see hes geting some use :thumbsup: )
Kaizer_Ryu

09-10-06, 01:13 PM		As Sa'vor moves on, the two return to the remains of their room.

Terra: *sigh* As if we didn't know about those things already. They make so much noise, it's hard to miss them.

Lisa: Anything we can do?

Terra: The thing of it is, I'm most concerned that his own creation gives him so much trouble. Either he's gotten careless, or whatever's controlling them boosts their power immensely.

Lisa: Both options don't bode well. Shouldn't we help him?

Terra: If he asks for it. His warrior pride won't allow him to ask until he is certain he can't win on his own.

Lisa: I just hope it's not the death of him. Roosevelt!

A trap door in the floor pops open.

Roosevelt: Yeah? *sees the mess* Oh, for the love of-.

Terra: Yeah, we had a little unannounced visitor. *hands him a bag of holding* Here's your asking price plus a little more to get started on the rest of it.

Roosevelt: Rest of it? *sees the GAPING HOLES in the paths in and out* :mad: You've gotta be kidding me...

Terra: If you don't mind, I'm gonna go keep an eye on Sa'vor. Should he find himself in over his head, I'll interfere. My shadow power should come in handy.

Lisa: *gives her a hug* Just be careful.

Terra: *hugs back* I will. I have no intention of ending up like Feal-Thas.

Terra melds into the shadows as Lisa and Roosevelt get to work repairing the room.

Roosevelt: Is she insane? More so than normal?

Lisa: She knows what she's doing. Taking that thing head on is what's getting Sa'vor and his troops in trouble. She can assist him without ever revealing herself. It takes more than a mindless Uber-puppet to take her on in her own element.

OOC: Take this if you want LKFangblade. Just remember, she won't strike against something like this from the open.
luna18moon

09-10-06, 02:25 PM		Slaypaw: mewl *my...head...*
Fluffy: mewmeow *so...worth..it...*
Slaypaw: *nuzzle* :cloud9:
urial angel of death

09-10-06, 04:57 PM		Volrath, Nalfien, Sarah, and Elina appear in a desolate world full of burning buildings and wrecked cars.

Sarah: Where are we?

Nalfien: In the world of Twisted Metal (tm).

Volrath: We're here to get a present for your aunty Satnak.

A motorcycle with side pod come to a stop next to them.

driver: What are you guys doing here?

Volrath: Just entering the contest Grimm. Mind if we borrow your bike?

Grimm: Guess not. After all I can always restart.

Grimm gets off his motorcycle unfolds a chair and opens up a coke. Volrath and Nalfien get on the bike and side compartment respectively.

Sarah: What are we supposed to do?

Volrath: Find a vehicle that suits you.

---------

Later
Volrath and Nalfien shoot a rocket into their last opponent.

Nalfien: Now we just have to kill Minion and it's all over.

Minion's tank crests the hill. Sarah and Elina poke their heads out of the top hatch.

Volrath: What the **** are you two doing there!

Elina: You said to get a car we liked.

Sarah: The demon driving it was very nice.

Elina: He said we could keep it for as long as we like.

Nalfien: Get down from there. We're all on the same team so it's over.

Sarah: Aaaawww, do we have to?

Volrath: Yes.

Elina: Poo.

---------

The group walks into an underground garage. Inside there are dozens of armed bodyguards standing around man seated on a throne made from broken car parts. The man is identified by his name tag, which reads Calypso.

Calypso: State your heart's desire and I will grant it.

Volrath: We'd like an I.O.U. for on wish redemable at any time or place.

Calypso: Done.

Volrath: Now that we've got our wish... Can I say it?

Calypso: No I'm the only one allowed to say the line.

Nalfien: *now standing right in front of the camera* My name is Nalfien, and I thank you for playing- *gurlging and coughing up blood*

Calypso's knife is sticking through Nalfien neck.

Nalfien: *pulls out knife* Did you really think that would kill me?

Calypso: No but it would stall you long enough for-

The title screne pops up.
Gladius_Lucix

09-10-06, 05:03 PM		OOcat: Great, now I have a giant duck I've gotta name.

Liam: I have a question.

OOcat: That's why I brought you here.

Liam: How come this multiverse has so much Weirsan in it?

OOcat: I'm one of those weizened mentors that adopts fringe, shunned, abused ideas that really just need love and turns them into original viable concepts. In this multiverse they aren't considered any more weird than some of the "normal" ideas from yours. It just happens that this entire multiverse is made up of mostly them, so your Weirsan battery interprets this as the most massive form of its energy ever discovered.

Liam: :mymy:

Kithle: It sounds a lot like the Forgotten Freedom: we take in the random weirdoes and turn out polished insane weirdoes.

Liam: I figured it was due to non-native materials and such, i.e. if I built a Weirsan Converter and battery out of supplies from THIS world and took it back to the Forgotten Freedom, it would have the same reaction. Though, that might also require the alternate me from this world building it.

Liam gives the battery an exhausted glance.

Liam: What the :censored: is wrong with this place? The battery's about to arc again!

Liam grabs it and dashes out the door again.

Giant Duck: MOMMY!

*KA-ZOOM-A-DING-DONG!*

New Voice: Where the :censored: am I?

Anyone looking out the window sees the Giant duck attempting to hug Liam, while a green and orange stripped dog seems utterly confused by the whole situation.
luna18moon

09-10-06, 07:39 PM		Slaypaw: Bleh:yuck:... Not...feeling...well... Not at all... I should find Terra, I keep throwing up...
She flinches as her belly suddenly aches.
Slaypaw: :mymy: New diagnosis for self. I have morning sickness.
OOC: GO GLADIUS! The weirsan stuff rocks!
Crystalforged

09-10-06, 07:46 PM		Liam: I figured it was due to non-native materials and such, i.e. if I built a Weirsan Converter and battery out of supplies from THIS world and took it back to the Forgotten Freedom, it would have the same reaction. Though, that might also require the alternate me from this world building it.

Liam gives the battery an exhausted glance.

Liam: What the :censored: is wrong with this place? The battery's about to arc again!

Liam grabs it and dashes out the door again.

Giant Duck: MOMMY!

*KA-ZOOM-A-DING-DONG!*

New Voice: Where the :censored: am I?

Anyone looking out the window sees the Giant duck attempting to hug Liam, while a green and orange stripped dog seems utterly confused by the whole situation.
OOKaizer: He's going to do that constantly now, isn't he?

OOCrystalforged: More than likely. It's probably our fault though for giving him so much encouragement.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-10-06, 08:52 PM		"*ROAR*!"

"DIE!"

Silver: You call that a monster? I've seen scarier things growing on tomatoes.

Bunny: Walls do not break that easily!

13: Does this thing have a plot?

Silver: You mean aside from teaching amatures not to mess with nature?

Bunny: If that swipe had been real those claws would have taken off his head!

13: Worst sci-fi movie ever.

OOcat (just coming in): :uh-huh: You guys do know you're watching Sa'vor fighting the monster-abomination thing?

13: Like I said, worst sci-fi movie ever.

Crow T.: And we should know.
Slaypaw: Bleh:yuck:... Not...feeling...well... Not at all... I should find Terra, I keep throwing up...
She flinches as her belly suddenly aches.
Slaypaw: :mymy: New diagnosis for self. I have morning sickness.
OOC: GO GLADIUS! The weirsan stuff rocks!
OOcat: AAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Silver: Beat you to it, huh? :bored:
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-10-06, 09:16 PM		260: If a book appears on this list: One Thousand and One D&D That Never Made It (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=699713), you are not allowed to use it.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-10-06, 10:27 PM		OOC: C'mon, Slivercat, at least humor him. Maybe he's building up to something. At least, I hope he is.

And now, some more rules.

261: Alkran is not Man-Bear-Pig

262: I am super serial about that

263: Silver is not allowed to encourage anyone to create a Man-Bear-Pig

264: Again, I'm super serial about that

265: Same goes for Caralot creating one

Caralot: Too late. That was one of my early projects.

266: Caralot is not allowed to create Pot-Bellied Elephants

Caralot: Well, duh. Haven't you ever heard that song by Loverboy?

267: Ketler is not allowed to create a Mecha-Steisand

268: ESPECIALLY not just to get Robert Smith of The Cure on board

269: Killing Kathy Lee Gifford is not only allowed, but encouraged

270: For the love of the gods, do not encourage Towlie

271: No one is allowed to name their familiar Mr. Hat

272: Or their animal companion

273: You cannot nickname Quench "Sparky"

274: He is not voiced by George Clooney either

275: Lucky is not Big Gay Al

276: Erk is not Chef

OOC: Ok, I'm done for now. Just had to get that out of my system.

And is it just me, or have I started a lot of trends on this thread? I mean, lesbianism, marriage, pregnancy, plane hopping, and extensive backstories. Are these my fault? Not that these are bad things, I rather enjoy them. I just want to know how much I get to stroke my ego. :D
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-10-06, 10:57 PM		OOC: C'mon, Slivercat, at least humor him. Maybe he's building up to something. At least, I hope he is.
OOC: It was a joke. :D I thought about it, but decided against it because I already did Marish. I just thought mentioning the scoop would be funny because I like sprining those things.
273: You cannot nickname Quench "Sparky"

274: He is not voiced by George Clooney either
OOC: What is this from? I feel like I know it…
275: Lucky is not Big Gay Al
Silver: Lucky isn't gay. Lucky is a straight male inside a female's body. And no, this isn't a subconcious reflection of OOcat's own sexual identity.

OOcat: Now do you believe me that I'm them rather than they are me?
And is it just me, or have I started a lot of trends on this thread? I mean, lesbianism, marriage, pregnancy, plane hopping, and extensive backstories. Are these my fault? Not that these are bad things, I rather enjoy them. I just want to know how much I get to stroke my ego. :D
OOC: I started having OOC be part of the In Character stuff. I may have also started other things which I forget at the moment. Not as many as you, but you aren't the only one.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-10-06, 11:05 PM		OOC: What is this from? I feel like I know it… South Park. Sparky the Gay Dog is voiced by George Clooney.

OOC: I started having OOC be part of the In Character stuff. I may have also started other things which I forget at the moment. Not as many as you, but you aren't the only one.
I remembered just a moment ago that you were actually the one to start the pregnancy run with Aerith & Saberiel. As much as I'd like to, I can't take credit for it. Though I believe I can take credit for screwing with the timeline in constructive ways. :D
rwarner3701

09-10-06, 11:21 PM		Jarlot gathers his gear and weapons for a long trip. Tucking the letter from Publishers Clearing House in his jacket he steps out the door and makes his way to the docks. Finding a suitable airskiff he gets the drops on the single guard shoves him onto the dock and begins to untie the ship. Once it is loose he turns to the helm.

Jarlot: To the Forgotten Freedom.

...

Jarlot: Slip?

...

Jarlot: I may have found a serious flaw in my plan.

Guard: Hands where I can see them.

Jarlot: ...:Censored:

Jarlot is escorted off to the prison.

----
At the door to Jarlot Senior's room on the Forgotten Freedom 2 Darian stands knocking. Finally Jarlot Senior opens the door.

Jarlot Senior: What do you want?

Darian: We are ready to get underway. Do you want to command the crew?

Jarlot Senior: Of course we can't expect you to do it now can we?

Darian: Err, of course not... we need your guidance.

Jarlot Senior: Good to see some one appreaciates a good captian.

Darian: Yes, sir. Right this way to the deck.

On the deck the crew is standing around with no sails to hoist or any other work to do. Sara is at the wheel ready to move the ship on command.

Jarlot Senior: What is this a woman can't fly a ship get her out of my way.

Darian: You said you didn't want to fly it.

Jarlot Senior: I don't but if she is the best replacement you can find I'll have to do it.

Darian: Ok...

Jarlot Senior moves to the wheel grabs hold and begins to concentrate. Concentrating more he forrows his brow and small beads of sweat begin to break out on his forehead. Sighing Terrek moves to the wheel.

Terrek: Let me you good for nothing fool. *Charm Monster*

Terrek grabs the wheel and steers the ship away from the Forgotten Freedom towards Zen'drik.

Jarlot Senior: I could have done it if you gave me one more moment.

Terrek: I highly doubt it you seem to be weaker than your son with his "epic levels". Sara come take the wheel I have a redshirt in the hold I need to see to.

Sara takes the wheel Ash and Aurixirthos standing near by while the rest of the crew head back below deck.

----
Sara: Those jerks niether one appreciates the power that I command. If I didn't have to fly this ship I would go to their cabins and give them each a personal demonstation.

Ash: Now Sara there is no need to rush into anything. It takes planning and timing to make revenge worthwhile.

Aurixirthos: Besides those two aren't exactly the easiest to take down. Terrek could rip you apart and eat your soul before you got your first spell off and Jarlot Senior is likely protected much like his son.
rampant

09-10-06, 11:28 PM		at the races

Tirmek - Now shut up Meshka, I've had enough of your lip.

Meshka - Ass

Sarah - Me next I called winner.
-------------------------------------

Satnak - Hello Sa'vor:rolleyes:

Sa'vor - This wouldn't be so embarrasing if you used both hands.

Satnak has a paralytic hold on the creature's spine, while sa'vor is trying to untangle himself from the immobilized claws.
cypher_zero

09-11-06, 01:06 AM		Sara stands at the helm of the FF2 fuming. The rest of the crew has wandered off and is engaged in idle chatter with each other or milling about aimlessly.

Sara: (mumbling) Frickin’ Terrek.. What’s his deal? *grumble* I’ll show him…

From seemingly nowhere, a voice begins to speak from behind her.

Voice: Calm yourself child. You let your emotions get the better of you.

Sara whirls around and sees Terrek standing behind her, watching.

Sara: What do you want!?

Terrek: A moment of your time. You seem… lost. As though you don’t know what to do or where you’re going. The Sarah on the Forgotten Freedom is not you, not anymore, perhaps you never were her. Likewise, your parents are not the same to you. But you need guidance. I am the most powerful sorcerer on either of the Forgotten Freedom’s. You could use the guidance I have to give, and not just in the ways of magic. You are adrift without something solid to hold onto. Perhaps I could help you find one.

Sara: Why me? What’s in it for you?

Terrek: I desire… an apprentice. You have the makings of a being with the power to shape Ebberon as you see fit, much like so many of us so-called “Ubers” did before we attained the heights of power we now possess. I wish to pass some of it on to you. Think about it. I will await your reply.

OOC: rwarner - Take this where you will. Send me a PM if you had/have something specific planned.
.
urial angel of death

09-11-06, 07:32 AM		Nalfien: Where are we headed to next?

Volrath: Sword Coast, Forgotten Realms a little jujst a little after the time of troubles.

Nalfien: Why the hells would we go to Forgotten Realms?!

Volrath: There is something special we need. All we have to do is tag along in one of the Baldur's Gate games.

Nalfien: I'm getting really tired of all this gift getting. Why should I go there?

Volrath: Have you never played the game? All the women have severe emotional problems and will fall for anyone who is even slightly nice to them.

Nalfien: Why didn't you say so earlier.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-11-06, 07:35 AM		Bunny: Just don't bring back another Elminster!

Elminster: Elminster is o—

*BLAM!*
Kaizer_Ryu

09-11-06, 09:19 AM		OOC: It was a joke. :D I thought about it, but decided against it because I already did Marish. I just thought mentioning the scoop would be funny because I like sprining those things. It occured to me (only after I was unable to access the internet) that you were talking about luna18moon. I was actually requesting you be nicer to Lord Kale Fangblade. If you think about it, EVERYTHING in this thread is cheesy on some level. :P :D

Silver: Lucky isn't gay. Lucky is a straight male inside a female's body. And no, this isn't a subconcious reflection of OOcat's own sexual identity.
Upon further consideration, I realized that Doog would have been a much better choice for that rule. Meh.

And I kind of figure that Sara's response should actually be done by Charles Phipps, considering she's his character. Unless it doesn't matter. *shrugs*
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-11-06, 10:17 AM		I was actually requesting you be nicer to Lord Kale Fangblade. If you think about it, EVERYTHING in this thread is cheesy on some level. :P :D
OOC: Yes, but I rarely get to do anything other than commentary. I needed a MST3K moment, and LKF set himself up. Besides, half the joke is that they treat a deadly battle like a B-movie. It's the Commentary Crew! :P They don't subscribe to the same reality that you guys do!
rampant

09-11-06, 10:40 AM		KIthle - Fireworks

Volrath - Check

Kithle - Zerhling for caralot

Sarah - Check

Nalfein (getting chewed on) - Double check

Kithle - Something for Satnak

Elina - (Waves wish token) check

Kithle - That leaves Kanatash and Serene, What do you get the psycho who has everything?
urial angel of death

09-11-06, 11:07 AM		Volrath: Well right now we're getting a non-gift item. I have no idea what to get for Serene, but have an idea of something for Kanatash.

OOC: Rampant if you want to do Serene's gift you can. Though if you don't I'll get around to it in the end.
Gladius_Lucix

09-11-06, 11:21 AM		OOKaizer: He's going to do that constantly now, isn't he?

OOCrystalforged: More than likely. It's probably our fault though for giving him so much encouragement.
OOGladius: Yeah, I figured the second one wouldn't have been as good. Dont't worry. There is a reason for this, beyond amusing randomness.

Liam re-enters the house with the Weirsan battery in hand. He looks at it, contemplating something.

Liam: Why didn't I think of that sooner?

He disconnects the battery from the converter. From the contacts on the converter, a stream of bubbles, butterflies, and other small, utterly random objects issue forth.

Giant Duck: :weep: Mommy! Why did you leave me?

Striped Dog: :mad: Shut up you whiny :censored:!
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-11-06, 02:52 PM		He disconnects the battery from the converter. From the contacts on the converter, a stream of bubbles, butterflies, and other small, utterly random objects issue forth.
Unfortunately they are soon followed by a swarm of squirrels.

Liam: :confused:

13: E.B.N.E. must have just had another good idea again.

Silver: Um? :uh-huh:

Liam: Yes?

The Commentary Crew are inching away.

Bunny: E.B.N.E.'s got this thing about squirrels and—

Squirrels: :devil:

Bunny: RUN AWAY!

The trio dash off.

Liam: Oh, dear—

The squirrels race outside without doing anything in the least bit suggested.

Kanatash: Well, that was un eventful.

Giant Duck: AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!! The tickling pain!

Striped Dog: *gurgle*
Crystalforged

09-11-06, 04:18 PM		OOC: Not to rush you silver but I was wondering if you have more planned or if you're going to be bringing them back soon. I've got a few more things planned back on the ship and there is plenty still to do for the wedding. For example I've got a surprise planned for them when they get back to the ship. :plotting:
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-11-06, 05:05 PM		OOC: Not to rush you silver but I was wondering if you have more planned or if you're going to be bringing them back soon. I've got a few more things planned back on the ship and there is plenty still to do for the wedding. For example I've got a surprise planned for them when they get back to the ship. :plotting:
OOC: Yeah, sorry, sleepy. Have method to bring them back soon. Must wait until more awake. Myabe have more fun while there?
urial angel of death

09-11-06, 05:54 PM		Nalfien, Sarah, Elina, and Volrath appear in a bustling city. A paladin in shining silver armor approaches them.

Paladin: Hail friends. What luck that we meet again.

Nalfien: Who are-*mouth is covered by Volrath*

Volrath: Why yes, what good fortune. Let me guess we have to go on another perilous adventurer to save or avenge someone we love.

Paladin: Why yes Imoen has been kidnapped.

Volrath: Well then lead on Micheal.

Micheal: Who are the little ones?

Volrath: The children of Faldorn and Mazzy. It's complicated and involves magic.

Micheal: Alright then come along.

Micheal turns his back on the group and begins to lead them through the city.

Nalfien: *whispering to Volrath* What was that about.

Volrath: In this universe most of us have doubles. When we shift over we take over the roles and bodies of our doubles.

Nalfien: So who am I and who are we rescueing.

Volrath: You are Edwin and we are rescueing Imoen who is Briana's double.

Nalfien: Alright then is she on of the easy ones.

Volrath: :doh: No you idiot. This game is made from Micheal's prospective and Imoen is later revealed to be his sister. Thus she is only available through a mod.

Nalfien: :uh-huh: Wait people made actually made a mod to make Micheal get with his sister. :yuck: Icky icky icky
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-11-06, 06:45 PM		13: ???????????

Bunny: Officially lost.

Silver: What is peoples' problem with ince—

OOcat: Goonight everybody!

OOC: Crystalforged, just write up your thing. The getting back isn't going to be anything special, so there aren't going to be continuity issues. Just assume that everyone I've introduced will be going.
urial angel of death

09-11-06, 06:59 PM		After alittle adventuring Nalfien begins trying to get the pants of the various female NPCs in Baldur's Gate 2.

*Shortly after he first meets Viconia*

Nalfien walks up to Volrath covered in hammer wounds.

Nalfien: I thought you said she was a ****

Volrath: Oh right she hates elves.

Nalfien: Now you tell me. I guess Jaheria is next.

*a while later*

Nalfien: Damnit she keeps repeating herself.

Volrath: Oh right that's a bug she has and the entity working this story arc is too lazy to download the patch.

Nalfien: I guess Aerie is my only choice left

*even later*

Nalfien: *enraged* So I have to put up with her whining for a whole month. Then after sleeping with me once she leaves!

Volrath: Yup, and if you continue on to Throne of Bhaal she has a baby.

Nalfien: We'll be gone by then right?

*Volrath gets a sorry look and walks away.*

Nalfien: Right? Man you're scaring me. Get back here!
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-11-06, 09:22 PM		Ash "You will want to be carefull of him my Laidy, Terrek never gives a gift but there is a hidden price. And the price is moastly more than the gift. Just his way."

Sara "You seem to know him?"

Ash "Not personaly, but I was a stoaway long before his time, and I have marked his deeds. If you have power you do not need his traning. Only to beleve in yourself."

Sara "Before, you spoke of revenge?"

Ash "Yes, its a dangerous thing. Like a fire it must be nurtured to be put to best effect, but left unchecked it rages beyond our controll. Becomes a conflagaration that can consume the greatest spirit like a coal... and in the end where once you stood, is only...Ash." his voice is far away, and softly solem.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-11-06, 09:45 PM		Sarah and Elina rock silently back and forth in their chairs, staring blankly into space.

Terra: Girls, you have to understand. What you saw was completely natural for grownups to do.

Sarah & Elina: :twitch:

Lisa: :blush: Well...the general act, at least.

Sarah & Elina: :twitch:

Terra: :blush: True. But...you know, that kind of thing went into creating you both.

Sarah & Elina: :twitch:

Lisa waves her hand in front of their faces, getting no response.

Lisa: I think they're in shock.

Terra: Can't blame them. I probably would be too if I walked in on that...

Sarah & Elina: :twitch:

Lisa: Maybe we should have someone else talk to them. I think our presence is weirding them out further.

Terra: All right.

Moments later, Serene walks in.

Serene: You needed something?

Terra points to the girls as she and Lisa move to exit the room.

Sarah & Elina: :twitch:

Serene: :mymy: Oh gods. They saw you together didn't they?

Terra: *nods* :blush: If you don't mind...

Serene: I'll see what I can do.

The door shuts as Serene kneels in front of them.

Serene: Elina? Sarah? You wanna tell Auntie Serene what you're thinking?

*after a minute or so*

Sarah: :twitch: ...so...many...tentacles...

Elina: :twitch: ...icky...noises...

Sarah: :twitch: ...screaming...

Elina: :twitch: ...impossible...position...

Serene: (i.h.h.) They must really have been going at it. *sigh* This could take a while...

Edit: I just remembered something I had to do:

*hugs his new, hot off the press copy of Faiths of Eberron that none of those filthy book store customers touched with their grubby hands. The one he got for 30% off because he's just that awesome...er, works there*

There, all better. :D
urial angel of death

09-11-06, 10:24 PM		Volrath, Nalfien, Sarah, Elina, Micheal, and the newly freed Briana are now adventuring in Hell. The room they enter has nothing except a single demon and a genie.

Micheal: Finally only one more Bhaal tear before we can fight Irenicus.

Demon: My name is Greed. Here is a sword you will need. *Hands Micheal an ornate black sword radiating strong evil.* *disapears*

Genie: Only the power of the of sword can set me free from my imprisonment here. When ever I leave this plane the bhaal tear will appear. Please give it to me.

Volrath: *picking up sword* I don't think so. I rather like it. Besides if I kill you with it won't you be "free" from this plane.

Genie: Well technically, but-

Volrath stabs the genie with the sword, instantly killing it. The bhaal tear forms into being, but is tainted by the evil preformed to obtain it. Micheal's holy-sword burns his hands. He quickly drops it realizing that he has become evil due to his companions actions.

Volrath: Come on Nalfien. We got what we came for. *lifts the sword* The Cake-Cutter of Doom!

Micheal: So you're just going to leave me with only one other party member and none of m paladin powers to confront the final boss. Not only this but I have no weapon!

Nalfien: Not our problem.

Nalfien, Volrath, and the girls disappear in a puff of green smoke.

Briana: I believe in you big brother.

Micheal: :weep:
Kaizer_Ryu

09-11-06, 10:48 PM		Sarah: :( That was mean.

Volrath: Oh, it's not as bad as you think.

Elina: :mad: You left him there to die!

Volrath: All they have to do is restart the game. Sure, it'll take at least a week of straight playing to get back to that point, but...

Sarah: Restart...? Oh, so that was a videogame universe.

Nalfein: You know about those?

Elina: Yeah. Our mommies took us to a lot of those. Let's see...we've been to Devil May Cry...

Sarah: Dante was so cool. :D

Elina: ...Parasite Eve...

Sarah: Eve was creepy and mean, but Aya was really nice to us.

Elina: ...Golden Sun...

Sarah: Isaac wouldn't talk till half way through, then Felix stopped talking. Just those "Yes" and "No" boxes for questions that didn't have yes or no answers.

Elina: Jenna and Isaac were so cute together. :D

Sarah: Oh! Don't forget Fire Emblem.

Elina: *starry cow eyes* Eliwood was dreamy...

Volrath: Don't do that look! You're too young to think like that!

Elina: But he was...

Volrath: *to Nalfein* If they ask, I'm blaming you.

Nalfein: :mad: HEY!
urial angel of death

09-11-06, 10:59 PM		Volrath: We can both agree that we're going to the manga version right.

Nalfien: Yeah for this one I had not argument. To bad our entities will probably never let us go to the Full Metal Alchemist.

Volrath: Especially after all the arguing we did.

Nalfien: Now girls for the next place we go you'll have to lose most of those morals you still cling to and ignore your consciences.

Elina: Do you mean?...

Volrath: Oh hell no. It's morals you'll be getting rid of not your decency.

Sarah: Okay then what is it?

*whispers*

OOC: I'll finish up Kantash's present in the morning.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-11-06, 11:04 PM		Volrath: Oh hell no. It's morals you'll be getting rid of not your decency.
OOC: Damn right. He knows what would happen. And BTW, I really hope you were either in a hurry or half asleep when you typed that post, because I can't restrain him forever.

Gram'mar: *in chains, frothing at the mouth* Must...kill...! So...many...typos...!
Crystalforged

09-11-06, 11:45 PM		Kanatash: Alright, I'm tired of this ****.

Jaela: What's the problem now?

Kanatash: Oh, its just that our respective entities have been slacking off here and neither of them is getting around to doing anything and I'm tired of ****ing waiting.

OOCrystalforged: (appearing from nowhere) Cool your jets, I've got the greenlight from OOCat, you have clearance to return using any and all means availible to you. The only condition is you must bring all the guest with you.

Kanatash: FINALLY. Alright boys, girls, and those of you who a gender does not readily apply we're getting out of this place.

Snaps his fingers and the airskiff reapears.

Kanatash: Pack your bags, we're going to disneyland. Actually on second thought-

Snaps his fingers again and the luggage rack on top of the skiff is suddenly occupied by several trunks and bulging bags.

Kanatash: -nevermind, I'll do it for you. Now all aboard.

The passengers slowly file into the airskiff which now appears to be far larger on the inside than the outside.

Jarlot: You know rather than cram into this little thing we could take the Forever Freedom.

Kanatash: We could but you don't have a crew right now and I don't have the patience to find one. I can come back later if you want and pick it up but I've been waiting a VERY long time for my wedding and I don't feel like waiting any longer.

Kithle: Impatience? Thats an odd emotion to see from you. After all you're the one who's giving our universe another million years just to "mature."

Kanatash: (whispering to Kithle) Alright you've got me, I am a little impatient but thats not the main thing. I'm worried we may not get back in time to stop... IT.

Kithle: It? What's it?

Kanatash: Just pray I'm wrong and you never find out. (turns back to the others) Alright, we're taking off. I'm going to take us on a detour through Xoriat to avoid any nasty ripples from that wild magic in you guys. Don't worry to much, just don't take a window seat if you have poor will saves and don't get worked up about it if something latches onto the side of the skiff, its probably just one of my old roomates saying hi. (a multicolored portal appears in front of the skiff) And here we go! (takes off at breakneck speed)



OOC: More to come either tonight or tomorrow.
Gladius_Lucix

09-12-06, 12:25 AM		Liam clicks a Wand of Protection from Chaos onto the converter, and casts it on itself.

Liam: Xoriat would proably be even worse than Caralot's Eberron. I don't want any more random output. In that vein, anyone want a Protection from Chaos?
rampant

09-12-06, 01:10 AM		Kithle - Doesn't work like that Liam, Insanity itself is an unaligned force. Its just when introduced to a sentient mind it tends towards chaos, or evil because of its tendency to warp perception. Kanatash if you see a blueish ultalithard with a missing long tentacle, please ram him.

Liam - So you're saying i need pro evil as well?

Kithle - *Sigh*
Charles Phipps

09-12-06, 01:58 AM		Volrath: Okay, now we're taking a detour to Waterdeep.

Michael: Again, just because she's my sister, I don't understand why I can't...

Nalfien: Damnit! PALADIN REMEMBER!

Michael: Sorry, old habits.

Volrath: In any case, we're supposed to meet with Khelban's nephew Danillo here.

Rose: HEY!

Volrath: THE HELL!?

Rose: Oh crap!

Volrath: YOU'RE DANILLO THANN!?

Rose: SHhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Do you want to let people on the big secret that all D&D takes place on the same world!?

Volrath: It does?!

Zella: I, Arilyn Moonblade, am an angsty and troubled half elven....GAH! YOU GUYS!

Michael: So whose Drizzt?

Rose: Well, the answer is that if you clean off all the grime, give him two scimitars, and....

Doog: Come Guwhw....however you pronounce your name, ya DAMN BIG CAT! I must brood angsty on my drowness.

Marish: Meow.

Volrath: Okay, no way in HELL are you convincing me that Doog is Drizzt Do'Urden. He's a half orc!

Rose: Okay, fine, maybe we're just pretending to be famous heroes of the Realms to get free drinks.

Sarah: I was thinking about being Volrath's apprentice.

Rose: Will it be...evil?

Sarah: Maybe?

Rose: Then no. You're going to be a red robe like your mother!

Sarah: YOU'RE SO MEAN!
Gladius_Lucix

09-12-06, 02:12 AM		Liam: Are you sure it won't work, Kithle? The original Weirsan Detector worked from a modified Detect Chaos spell. But, maybe...

Liam pulls out a few more wands and casts Protection from Law, Good, AND Evil on the Weirsan Converter.

Liam: At least it's covered from anything with an alignment descriptor. I really need to figure out an off switch for this thing.
rampant

09-12-06, 02:28 AM		Serene - Ok first thing, get you out of shock. *distractionx2*

Sarah - Huh?!

Elina - Spells!?

Serene - Now Seperate the faces from the people so you don't get the parent effect.

Elina and Sara - .....:tantrum: *concentrate*

Serene - Ok?

Elina and Sarah - *nod*

Serene - Ok now what you saw was sex, now point in getting shy about it at this point. It is part of most humanoid lifecycles, in fact its required for most animals above the level of jelly fish to reproduce. Frankly its something that will interest you in about 8-10 more years considering your humanoid side is half-elf. Whats probably freaking you out is the intensity, now the best thing I can think of is to calm down a little. You will need to talk to your parents of course, but right now you two need a dreamless nap *lullaby*.
-----------------------

Terra - Well that was amazing.

Lisa - Yes, thank you.

Terra - That, and I didn't know you could use a sleep spell on an outsider.

Serene - Between the music and the seals... Anyway I just calmed them down to the point you could talk to them. If they start to get freaked out just remind them to dissasociate the faces.
urial angel of death

09-12-06, 07:16 AM		OOC: I fixed the typos. Yes I was half asleep when I wrote it. Kantash's gift story still needs a little bit of work so you'll have to wait a while longer.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-12-06, 07:39 AM		A Gatekeeper orc is standing guard over a seal in the Shadow Marches. Something begins to happen to the seal, causing it to try and contract on itself, as if not wanting to exist. The orc contacts his collegues and sets about trying to shore up the seal, but to no avail. The design on the seal changes, and the seal expands until it is about the size of a huge ship.

Several aberrations of unspeakable horror climb out and make a mad dash away. The Gatekeeper stands his ground, ready for a battle. But the aberrations have no fight in them, fleeing in obvious terror from something far worse than them.

The prow of a ship begins to emerge from the surface of the seal, a wide ship with sails ringed around it. When it has fully emerged it floats in the air for a moment.

Caralot: Really, Kanatash, did you think dealing with the Wild Magic would be that easy?

Kanatash: :uh-huh:

Caralot: Kanatash? (waves hand in front of eyes)

Puck: He seems to do that a lot around us.

Darastrix: Honestly, Caralot, you're incorigable. Did you have to go chasing after every single creature that defied the laws of nature?

Caralot: Oh, mom, you know me. :D

Darastrix: I do. I'm just surprised you managed to find someone who matches your taste in freaks.………………:weep: My daughter's growing up so fast.

Bruce: You say this boy works for the Daelkyr? (slaps Kanatash hard on the back) :D Good on ya! That's a steady job if I ever saw one. Lovely location, too. Plannin' on tak'n her there for the honeymoon, eh.

Kantash: Xoriat…plane of maddness…treating it like a vacation paradise…

Gillamma: Such pretty colors…lovely breeze…

Bruce: Too bad about that skiff of yours. Obviously needs to be better taken care of.
******
Bunny: How does it feel to be back?

Greyfeline: :devil:
rampant

09-12-06, 11:01 AM		Satnak - Ok you no critters in Serene's cake got it?

Greyfeline - *ULP*

Satnak - They were good, but my Serene is a little.... Squeamish about violence.
rwarner3701

09-12-06, 11:40 AM		OOC: Sorry for the delay was busy the last few days. At least it gave Ash a chance to speak up about Terrek.

Sara: I'm not so sure. I would like the chance to learn more but Ash doesn't trust you.

Terrek: It is true that I often have many reasons to do what I do but that doesn't mean that you can't trust me. All I offer is knowledge and the chance to learn from me, and all I ask in return is assistance in my endeavors.

Ash: I warn you to be cautious of him. Be sure that his goals are aligned with yours but also his methods. A goal is not worthy if it must be achieved by improper methods.

Sara: I will learn what you can teach me and I will help you where I can but only until I wish to leave. Then I wish to be able to leave owing no debt to you.

Terrek: That is acceptable but I am also able to end this arrangement when I see fit should you prove a less astute student than I had hoped. In time, hopefully you will come to trust me despite my flaws.

Ash: Know this Terrek, although you are beyond me in many ways I will see to it that you hold to your word.

Sara: Good now we are almost to the island better gather the crew for the attack.

Terrek heads to get his gear while Ash goes to gather the rest of the pirates for the attack.

OOC: Ash is taking on a protective father role over Sara. Possibly concerned she will one day have the dark past that he now carries. Charles did you have any suggestions for Sara or is she basically adaptable?

----
(The next time Volrath, Nalfien, Sarah and Elina are changing planes)

The four plane hoppers fade back into reality in a dark cave lit by beams of light from the ceiling. Water pools around at the floor and most of the rock surfaces are covered in loot. The most distinguishing feature is a large stone chest in the middle of the room with symbols carved on the outside and the dead body propped against.

Nalfein: Where are we now?

Volrath: I'm not exactly sure, but this isn’t right.

Nalfien: How could you mess up the spell?

Volrath: It’s not my fault I read it correctly.

Nalfein: Sure when I mess up you can blame me but when something is your fault I can't blame you. :mad:

Volrath: It’s not that. I just am sure that I read the scroll right.

Elina: Actually it might have been my fault.

Nalfein & Volrath: WHAT?!

Elina: Well and kind of my mom's also. You see there was this man all dressed in black and he gave me this note, and my mom, Terra, said that I should follow the instructions on the note so I did. See (hands Volrath the note)

Volrath: Change ost to falas. That would send us to a completely different location.

Nalfein: My one chance to blame you and it turns out it really wasn't your fault.

Volrath: So what are we supposed to do here?

Sarah: I don’t know that is all the note said.

Elina: Ooo look at the fancy hat.

Elina goes over to the body and takes off the large black hat with a black feather sticking out of it, trying it on she finds that it doesn’t fit.

Volrath: Well bring it along anyway and lets get back on track.

Volrath begins to cast and the cave fades out of their vision.
Crystalforged

09-12-06, 01:48 PM		Kanatash: Caralot, I just have to say this. Your parents are seriously screwed up.

Caralot: Oh, I'm sorry honey, what happened?

Kanatash: Don't be sorry I think I love these people.

Caralot: But you were in shock just a moment ago.

Kanatash: That wasn't shock that was awe. I'm seriously trying to think if there's some way I can divorce my parents and have them adopt me.

Kithle: Wait, wouldn't that make your relationship kind of incestuous?

Kanatash: Your point being?

Kithle: Oh yeah, nevermind. Say sorry about the airskiff. I really didn't think blue-boy would be able to rip it in two like that. Do you think you're parents will be mad?

Kanatash: They're both too senile to notice its missing. Speaking of my parents however we need to get back right away, we've taken too long as it is and the longer those two are left alone on the ship the greater the danger of IT happening...

Caralot: (glancing a Kithle) What's he talking about?

Kithle: (shrug) Beat me, he wouldn't tell me either. Personally I think he's just being a drama queen.

Kanatash: (evil glare)
Gladius_Lucix

09-12-06, 02:02 PM		Liam walks over to the conversation.

Liam: I think he means baby pictures. That's what every adult fears when parents of that sort come to visit, especially when significant others are in the mix.
rampant

09-12-06, 02:24 PM		Sparking and beeping

Tirmek - Your insane mother.

Ketty - *eyes sparkle malevolently*

Tirmek - She's going to kill you again.

Ketty - :evillaugh

Tirmek - Blast it, drop the photo album right now, and we can escape with our hides intact.
Gladius_Lucix

09-12-06, 02:28 PM		OOC: Did I set it up for a baby picture convention? If so, then Terra and Lisa never had their parents show up with baby pictures. :angelhide
Serene might not have to worry about that sort of thing, unless Terrek wants to show pictures of the vat he grew her in.
Lord Kale Fangblade

09-12-06, 02:47 PM		Naz'roth lay on the obsidian floor, his form twitched slightly as emerald sparks flowed across his body. there was the sickening crack as bones slid back into place. His eyes snapped open. he rose and looked at the carnage around him.
the twisted and mangled bodies of many Half-Dragons lay scattered about him, Naz'roth shuddered as a image flashed across his mind. he glanced down at the large rents in his armour plates which even now where slowly mending themselves.

Naz'roth closed his eyes and searched for the beacon they'd attached to the creature. he teleported. there was a swift flash of light and he appeared twenty feet away from the creature, Its face was frozen in a roar of triumph and its claws where gripped around Sa'vor whom was currently wrenching himself free. while Satnak kept her grip on its spine. Naz'roth chuckled slightly. Sa'vor stopped struggling and his form dissolved into a swarm of spiders that streamed along the creatures arms towards the floor, where after several feet they reformed into Sa'vor.

Satnak: you must be losing your grip Sa'vor. normally you'd of turned into a swarm much sooner.

Sa'vor: its touch suppresses magical and supernatural abilities within its opponents. otherwise I would of been able to sooner.

Satnak: what im curious about is how it escaped. I thought you guys had this thing restrained.

Naz'roth: *walking up to the creature* It seems to have increase in power since we bound it. someone must of improved it.

Satnak: who?

Naz'roth: I have my suspicions. though I don’t deem it neccesary to tell them to you now.

Satnak: Not neccecary? this creature not only killed you, but threw Sa'vor about like a rag doll.

Naz'roth: This was a bold move, i doubt that our opponents would try this again. they dont want to bring full attention to ourselves. the aim of the attack was to kill, Maim or destroy as much of this ship as possible. oh and Satnak, you may execute it now.

There was a sickening crack and the creature slid to the floor. Naz'roth raised a guantleted hand and its corpse became dust. He had a few suspects, though nothing solid yet. but if it was whom he thought it was, then He really wanted the crew angry. but at who? Sa'vor? perhaps he was trying to split the crew, make them wage war against each other. Naz'roth frowned, every turn led to more and more questions.

Naz'roths boot struck somthing. he looked down, it was a holy symbol. and next to it a large white feather.
cypher_zero

09-12-06, 07:09 PM		OOC: Did I set it up for a baby picture convention? If so, then Terra and Lisa never had their parents show up with baby pictures. :angelhide
Serene might not have to worry about that sort of thing, unless Terrek wants to show pictures of the vat he grew her in.
OOC: I may just have to do that now that you mention it... :schemes:
urial angel of death

09-12-06, 08:05 PM		Nalfien leads Volrath, Sarah, and Elina (who are all dressed in school kid uniforms) up to a warehouse guarded by two soldiers holding AK-47s.

Nalfien: Hello good sirs my class is scheduled to tour this location.

soldier: I sorry you can't enter this area.

Nalfien: That's really too bad they had been looking forward to this for so long.

soldier: How did you get this far in anyway. We'll have to escort you-

The soldier stops as he realizes that his torso no longer connects to his legs and the group is walking straight past his dismembered form.

The group enters a huge warehouse filled to the brim with crates.

Sarah: What are we looking for?

Volrath: A portrait of some of Kanatash's good friends and a big case of documents that should have "The Philadelphia Experiment" written on it.

Nalfien: Found the case!

Elina: Is this the other thing.

Elina holds up a picture of Nikola Tesla, Howard Hughes, Adam Weishaupt, H.P. Lovecraft, and Nostradamus having a beer bash at the Eye of The Pyramid pun in Ingolstadt.

Volrath: Yes that's the one. Let's get out of here.

OOC: Sorry Rei and Kaizer. I just couldn't make the Hellsing visit work. :(
urial angel of death

09-12-06, 08:06 PM		OOC: Now just Serene's gift. Do you want to take it from here Rampant?
rampant

09-12-06, 08:09 PM		Chalky - Now what can I get the the happy couples..hmmmm....:plotting: :lightbulb :schemes: :evillaugh:
-------------------------------------

OOC - If I do it they hit Kindom Hearts, my brother never let me near any of his precious final fantasy discs. Tell you what you intro them to the world of FF9 I'll do the synthing when your done.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-12-06, 10:11 PM		OOC: Did I set it up for a baby picture convention? If so, then Terra and Lisa never had their parents show up with baby pictures. :angelhide
OOC: Well, Terra's biological parents didn't really take pictures, what with her father being the servant of an evil demi-god of shadow. I'll be getting more into what happened in Terra's earliest years from Laurel's perspective later (yes, more backstory. I can't help it. It's just so much fun. ;) ). Her adoptive mother may have, but Terra wasn't there till she was about 8, so it doesn't count.

Lisa, hmmm... I guess Queen Diani might have some, but I doubt Krozen would, simply for the purpose of deniability. That, and he's a royal jackass/scumbag/pedophile/sick bastard/etc. Take your pick. They all fit.

As for Sarah & Elina, they live in fear of the day their mothers break out "the pictures". I am so going to do that sooner or later. :devil:
urial angel of death

09-12-06, 10:22 PM		Chalky - Now what can I get the the happy couples..hmmmm....:plotting: :lightbulb :schemes: :evillaugh:
-------------------------------------

OOC - If I do it they hit Kindom Hearts, my brother never let me near any of his precious final fantasy discs. Tell you what you intro them to the world of FF9 I'll do the synthing when your done.

OOC: I'll intro them in the morning. Tonight I'm too tired. Then this story will finally end.
rampant

09-12-06, 10:38 PM		Satnak - Where the bloody mol is my cat?

Serene - :rolleyes: Focus silly girl.

Satnak - Oh right, I guess Illis would be my best man. He's my best friend, and I owe him for missing his wedding.

Serene - Ok, and Dad will be giving me away.

Satnak - That leaves bridesmaids, maid of honor, and bridegrooms. How about Disarray?

Serene - Yes but, ummmm...

Satnak - Just let he/r fill any blank spot. Changelings are useful that way.

Serene - That Leaves some gaps still, what about NJ26?

Satnak - Ok, lets ask Caralot if we need to fill 2 ranks or just so one array of Bridesgrooms and Bridesmaids.

Serene - So where are we going for the honeymoon?

Satnak - Um Well with the festival of filched feather flyer feasts I've got some time off from work, and I thought maybe I could take you up to the FrostFell resort. I have a friend in their navy and the cash from work since I can grab employee discounts and have been using liam as a side supplier for the really expensive jammers for the girls.

Serene - Tell me more, it sounds like it gets cold up there. Will we be "sharing body heat";)

Satnak - :embarrass
luna18moon

09-12-06, 11:38 PM		Slaypaw has moved herself into Norbaz's kitchen, near the oven so that she could feel warm.
Slaypaw: Feeling slightly better now. Where's Fluffy when you need him?
Fluffy walks in, holding an opened can of tuna.
Fluffy: Here, you should eat.
Slaypaw: Thanks Fluffy.
She eats, then flinches.
Slaypaw: They're energetic, aren't they?
Fluffy: *ear against her belly* Yeah, they kick a lot.
Slaypaw: Our kittens will be born soon, Fluffy. Is Greyfeline back?
Fluffy: Yeah, he's here to cook the cakes for Mommy's wedding.
Slaypaw: Ask if he still has that recipe for catnip cake. It's heavenly...
Fluffy: :bow: It shall be done, my love.
Slaypaw: *laughs* Thanks, Fluffy.:cloud9:
A few seconds later...
Fluffy: Greyfeline, the Blood Angel requires catnip cake!
Greyfeline: :D
Another couple minutes...
Greyfeline presents Fluffy with a ringshaped cake.
Fluffy: Thanks, Greyfeline. This looks great!
Greyfeline: :ayyyy!:
Crystalforged

09-13-06, 01:00 AM		Kanatash: No its not the baby picture I'm talking about, I'm not too worried about them, after all I was literally a different person back then. Now lets get going.

---

Not long afterwards Kanatash, Caralot, Kithle, and Liam are standing on the prow of the Forever Freedom.

Kanatash: Hm, we should be getting close now, the ship should be appearing over the horizon in the next minute or so. Here's hoping. (crosses fingers)

Caralot: Honestly, what could have you so worked up?

Kanatash: You'll see- DAMN! It's worse than I thought!

The Forgotten Freedom is just cresting the horizon but even from this distance smoke can be seen rising from it.

Kithle: Oh my, what happened? Were they attacked?

Kanatash: No, it's something far more insidious.

The ship has drawn closer now and music can be faintly heard, the smoke appears not to be coming from the ship itself but rather from a great bonfire built on the deck. Thousands of figures can be seen standing around on the deck.

Liam: My, the captain seems to have taken on a great number of new redshirts.

Kanatash: Those aren't redshirts those are hippies.

Kithle: What, this is what you were all worried about? They're just hippies!

Kanatash: (rounding on Kithle) JUST HIPPIES?! You don't know hippies like I do, I grew up with them, I've studied them. You don't comprehend how bad this is. You'll see though, oh you'll see...

---

Moments later the Forever Freedom docks alongside the Forgotten Freedom. Thousands, no tens of thousands of dirty disheveled Kalashtar roam the decks and he haze of dreamlily smoke makes it almost impossible to breath. The crowd is unbelievably dense, making movement through the corridors almost impossible. The hippies have litterally filled every nook and corner of the FF's nigh infinite deck space. More airskiffs than can reasonably be counted surround the ship moored to every orifice and more can be seen closing from every direction.

Kanatash: (turning to Bruce) I'm sorry, but the introduction will have to wait till a little later I'm afraid. The infestation is worse than I ever imagined.

Kithle: How did this happen?

Kanatash: It's a fundemantal law of hippies, if not properly contained, the just attract more and more hippies in a viscious cycle. First it's one or two shacking up in your attic, then they're forming a drum circle in your back yard, next thing you know there's a full blown Hippie jam band festival taking over like we have here. This is possibly the worst I've ever seen it, as I figure it now the crowd is 6 miles in diameter and growing. I was afraid this would happen when I had to leave my parents here unchecked but I never imagined this.

Kithle: But why are they all Kalashtar?

Kanatash: Because Kalashtar are hippies, at least most are. Think about what you know about them, Kalashtar talk all the time about how the "inspired" are trying to control everyone and the "Dreaming Dark" are destroying the world but rather than actively fight them most just sit around and "meditate." Go over that sentance again in your mind but replace the words "inspired" with "the man", "Dreaming Dark" with "the Corperations", and the "meditate" with "get high."

Kithle: ...I never thought about it that way before.

Liam: So what do we do now?

Kanatash: This is out of my legue, I'm going to need to call in a real expert. (whips out a small, yellowed tome carrying the title "Summoning Extra-Dimensional Beings for Dummies" and starts paging through it) Lets see... Ok, standard pentagram, good... chilli made from the meat of human flesh, we can do that... 12 feet of pig intestines, could be tricky... fatty junk food, not too hard... black candles, of course... stocking cap, fine... 3 pints of blood of the innocent, lets see... I've got one... two... Damn, does anyone have a spare pint of blood of the innocent?



OOC: More tomorrow, sometime. Cookie if you can PM with the name of who he's going to summon.
rampant

09-13-06, 01:19 AM		Kithle - I think I might have a batter plan, but go ahead and summon we'll need all the lifting muscle we can get.

Kithle pulls several vials of various powders and herbs from his belt and proceeds to the bonfire.

He casts a series of protective effects and tosses the entire mess into the fire.

The flames shoot up purple for about a minute catching the attention of most of the hippies.

Hippie - Whoa what am I smoking?

Dirty Hippy - I dunno, but I want some.

Damn Dirty Hippy - Fingerrrrrrsssssss!

Billowing green smoke roils forth and any who inhale without some serious gas masks or other defenses drop like flies.

Kithle - This is why I wear the plaque.:D

Kanatash - One what was that? two how is this related to your title?

Kithle - Some of Terra's best stuff, a dash of evaporated keelhaul, enough sleepy powder to put the fury under, and Essesnce de Trogolodyte. As to the second Question, you now have to Clean up before they wake up in about 5 minutes. Also the smoke supresses any power or similar effect above about 3rd level. I'm gonna go duct tape people to the elemental ring while everyone is out.
cypher_zero

09-13-06, 01:24 AM		Terrek heads to get his gear while Ash goes to gather the rest of the pirates for the attack.
Terrek pulls Ash to the side to speak with him privately. He glares down menacingly for a moment, then apparently decides the pyro is not threat to him.

Terrek: Tell me whelp, what is your interest in the girl? You seemed exceptionally… prompt to defend her, though I know for a fact that you’ve not had much contact in the past. If I did not think it would be a… hindrance to my goals, I would simply “remove” you. I do not simply because it would be counterproductive at this particular moment. Regardless, I wish to know your intent so far as the girl is concerned.

OOC: Just a couple of quick notes here (‘cause I’m picky): Terrek would never admit his own flaws. He only sees the flaws in others, not himself; part of what makes him arrogant. Also, in my mind, I see Terrek as someone that chooses his words carefully, often using a word much larger than is needed to express his point for the sole purpose of “lording” his intelligence over others. That’s why he uses the “…” in between words all the time – it’s supposed to show that he’s pausing while thinking of a word. Keep in mind though that this is not something that he would not do with Serene, Naz’roth, Kanatash or anyone else either close to him or that he feels is of adequate intelligence. One last bit then I’m done with my rant: Even though Terrek may be a trickster and a deceiver, he is still a man of his word. You will note though that, like the dragons, he goes exactly by his word and so will always include some kind of contingency. I.E. “I will not kill you so long as you bear the sacred relic.” Soon as that relic is dropped though, in Terrek’s eyes, your life is fair game. Also note that something like, “I will see to it that you are adequately compensated,” doesn’t actually mean that he’s going to pay you, but you will receive some kind of “adequate” payment. This could mean anything from turning you into one of the undead, thereby “paying” you with “immortality,” to providing a service in exchange (often one of greater value so that you are in his debt, and not the other way around), to simply killing you if he feels that you did not live up to your end of the bargain. Killing you also involves eating your soul. Terrek is not someone you want to shortchange. Little things like this are why I usually have a “hands off” rule with Terrek, however, rwarner- you seem to have a pretty good grasp of his character and have been writing him fairly well, so I thought I’d point some of this stuff out for your future reference. You will note that, coming from me, this is a huge compliment.

Ok, rant’s over. I’m done.
.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-13-06, 07:26 AM		Caralot and her family (this word includes the werewolves, Johnny, and Kanatash) are walking through the corridors to the guest quarters, having to step over a lot of unconcious hippies. Again, somehow the gas doesn't seem to be affecting any of them.

Bruce (turning to Kanatash): Don't see what you're going on about this being bad. I've lived in Sharn. Do you know what that's like? There's the serial-killer prerequisite for cabbies, muggers on every street corner, and the famous Sharn "Get the f*ck out of my way!"

Gillamma: Not to mention crowding onto a subway car with people wearing hats made from newspaper because they think that the rakshasa won't be able to read their mind past the innane "Ask Flamwind" section and then getting gropped by some guy with horrible breath.

Puck: And they manage to eat those "hotdogs".
urial angel of death

09-13-06, 07:26 AM		Volrath, Nalfien, Sarah, and Elina appear underwater beside a coral reef. Elina and Sarah are floating in the water, whereas Volrath and Nalfien are standing on the floor.

Elina: *gurgle* Can't breath!

Volrath: The water's not real. Just stop believing in it.

Sarah: Really?

With that the girls both make an undignified fall to the floor.

Sarah: You could have warned us.

Nalfien: Where would the fun be in that?

Volrath: Now we have to find Hades. *jumps behind reef.* A then he is. This is so much easier in a first person perspective.

OOC: In FF9 you have to search blindly because your view is third person from in front of the coral. It takes forever to find him!

IC:
Hades: You now have access to the legendary syth shop.

Nalfien: Don't we have to fight you?

Hades: This game can only understand one party of heroes. Zidane's group already beat me. So the game counts it cleared for everyone.

OOC: Your turn Rampant.
Gladius_Lucix

09-13-06, 08:28 AM		Liam picks his way through the unconcious hippies to his lab. Entering, the Duct Tape Swarm is pushing out the hippies.

Duct Tape Swarm: Welcome back, boss.

Liam: Secure the door. I have work to do. And send out a roll to keep an eye on things.

Duct Tape Swarm: Right away.

Liam sits down at his desk and starts working.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-13-06, 11:07 AM		Terra: Nice work using my "Poison Dream", but I figure there's a better way to be a Magnificent Bastard in this situation.

Kithle: Oooooo, tell me! :D

Terra: You remember I'm an herbalist first, a druglord second? Well, I've got something here that will purge their systems of all foreign substances...

Kithle: You mean...they won't be high anymore?! YES!

Terra pulls out a satchel filled with a fine powder and hands it too him. He goes to chuck it into the fire, but she stops him and pulls out a bucket of water.

Terra: Not there. It's catalyst is water. It's highly condensed, and the water will turn it into a white smoke. They won't even see it coming.

Kithle: :devil: *pours it in the water*

The powder does just as she said, slowly but surely filling the corridors. Voices cry out in despair as they realize their situation.

Kithle: I gotta go see this.

Terra: There's one more thing you can do.

Kithle: What could be better than hippies unable to get high?

Terra: Who do you think supplies them? What am I head of? And what does that make me in their eyes?

Kithle: ...that is the most insideous thing I have ever heard. :devil: :evillaugh

OOC: I just love the idea that Terra is "The Man". A bunch of clean (not in the personal hygene sense) hippies being told that their stash was bought off the Man, who is in fact a woman. :evillaugh
Crystalforged

09-13-06, 11:11 AM		Kithle - I think I might have a batter plan, but go ahead and summon we'll need all the lifting muscle we can get.

Kithle pulls several vials of various powders and herbs from his belt and proceeds to the bonfire.

He casts a series of protective effects and tosses the entire mess into the fire.

The flames shoot up purple for about a minute catching the attention of most of the hippies.

Hippie - Whoa what am I smoking?

Dirty Hippy - I dunno, but I want some.

Damn Dirty Hippy - Fingerrrrrrsssssss!

Billowing green smoke roils forth and any who inhale without some serious gas masks or other defenses drop like flies.

Kithle - This is why I wear the plaque.:D

Kanatash - One what was that? two how is this related to your title?

Kithle - Some of Terra's best stuff, a dash of evaporated keelhaul, enough sleepy powder to put the fury under, and Essesnce de Trogolodyte. As to the second Question, you now have to Clean up before they wake up in about 5 minutes. Also the smoke supresses any power or similar effect above about 3rd level. I'm gonna go duct tape people to the elemental ring while everyone is out.
Kanatash: :bored: Is that all? Well that's rather pointless. You do realize there is no way we're going to be able to haul over ten thousand hippies off the ship in just 5 minutes. Even if we could or you just killed all of them it would only be a temporary solution because more of the bastastards will just keep coming, they're like Crystal except they smell bad. If anything you've just given the ship a reputation among them as a place to find "some good s***." No there's only one way to drive out a hippie infestation of this magnitude, now make yourself useful and find me another pint of the blood of the innocent.
rampant

09-13-06, 11:18 AM		Kithle - Who Said I was helping you? I do this for my own amusement, thats why Rose is taped to the elemental ring and Doog is tangled up in the rigging. ... Wait a minute rigging?

Kanatash - I should have known.:doh:
rwarner3701

09-13-06, 11:45 AM		OOC: Cypher, Terrek used acceptable and astute. More big words got it. As for the admitting flaws he could not very well tell her how terrific he was while Ash, who she knows better, was standing right there. Kind of like how he was with Terra and Lisa, when they were in his plane, he has to gain her trust first.

How I thought Ash would respond. Not his actual response.

Ash: As I expect you know, power is a burden... one she may not be ready to carry. In time she can learn to control her power but in one so young mistakes are far to common. I want to save her from herself before she makes mistakes she can not live with... mistakes like mine.

OOC: Eled any chance you could do some flashback/dream type thing to reveal more of Ash's past? I am thinking that he stays in the shadows because he is worried to act afraid of what he might do. Right/Wrong? Any more info/development would be helpful.
rampant

09-13-06, 12:12 PM		Sarah - What makes this synth shop so great?

Volrath - You can take other items and have them fused into more powerful gear.

Nalfein - Knowing how protective Satnak is of Serene I'm thinking a defensive mixture.

Elina - But this is Serene's present.

Volrath - So lets see if we can't come up with something artsy. I've got a spare Ribbon.

Nalfein - Lets try a new recipe, none of the people from the game are really the type to use something Serene might like. (I'm pretty sure there were no bards in ff 9, correct me if I'm wrong.)

Hades - Let me get my notes I wanna remember this.
urial angel of death

09-13-06, 12:50 PM		OOC: No bards. Your party is as follows

Thief
Black mage
Summoner with minor white mage abilities
Fighter
White mage with minor summoning ability
Blue mage (OOUrial does his blue mage dance)
Monk
Dragoon
rwarner3701

09-13-06, 01:35 PM		Sara guides the Forgotten Freedom 2 over the island slowing for a moment to allow Bolt Tooth Tony, Squishy, and a handful of redshirts to jump off the side. Also Darian leaps off the back as they start to pick up speed. Once the first party is away she takes the ship lower and lets it in a hover over the dock while the remaining crew board airskiffs to make their way to shore. There are two skiffs full of redshirts with a third filled by the remaining named crew.

Jarlot Senior: Let the redshirts take the lead.

Aurixirthos: I thought the others went to eliminate any resistance so we could make it to shore.

One of the airskiffs supters and falls to the water. Searching the crew is able to spot the mage just at Bolt Tooth Tony shoots him in the knee with his crossbow.

Jarlot Senior: Better safe than sorry.

Redshirt in water: HELP!! I can't swim.

The two remaining airskiffs make it safely to shore, and the crew find a large sing.

COMING SOON!!!
A fine luxury resort for everyone to enjoy
(if you can afford it)
Paradise Island

Ash: (looking up and down the beach) Is there anyone here?

Jarlot Senior: That mage wasn't protecting the beach there must be something worth stealing. Split up and find it.

----
Jarlot wakes in a small jail cell and looks out to see his captor.

Guard: Finally awake I see. Ready to spend another day behind bars.

Jarlot: Today is the day I plan to escape and you are far to weak to stop me.

Guard: You are locked up and have no weapons what exactly is your plan.

Jarlot: I will use my epic level power to escape and defeat you.

Guard: Epic level power?

Jarlot: I wouldn't expect you to understand, you don't even have a name.

Guard: What!? Of course I have a name its ga.. urk... ur *gurgle*

With a sword protruding from his body the guard falls to the ground as his blood begins to pool. Standing behind him is Darian.

Darian: The entities have deemed you unworthy.

Jarlot: Entities? Wait a second... Darian?

Darian: Captian Jarlot? What are you doing here?

Jarlot: Its a long story... quick get me out of here I can show you where the loot is.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-13-06, 02:24 PM		( OCC: Rwarner3701 Im glad you like Ash but he is my Charicter and I have plans for the situation with him and sara. Please respect that, and he wouldnt have responded that way to Terrek, if you need any help with him PM me. Im planning to work his past into a plot but it will need to wait till your ark is done. )
rampant

09-13-06, 02:37 PM		Elina - Does this mean?

Sarah - Yay monster hunt!

Volrath - indeed we will need more components

Nalfein - So far we have A ribbon, and a socketed ring.
---------------

Elina - Too easy

*Won Siren Card*

npc player - awwwwww

Sarah - Yawn, not what I was thinking.

Volrath - Serene is a peace loving girl, I doubt she'd be happy with something acquired by slaughter. Stealth on the other hand;)

------------------

*stole fire feather*

Nalfein - was that an actual game item?

Volrath - who cares?

Sarah - *run away*

Garuda - Squwarrrrrr

Volrath Used hide

Nalfein used gaurd

Nalfein - Hey do I look like steiner

Garuda used flames of heaven

NAlfein - Wait a minute garuda are weak monsters.

Volrath - We have a different entity in charge, one who likes to beef up the random encounters. Be glad he hasn't imported his Dire-Gnolls.

Nalfein burns.
-----------------------

Nalfein resembles a used matchstick.

Nalfein - How many more fire feathers do we need?

Volrath - We were done 6 birds ago.

Nalfein - hate you
---------------

Hades - Interesting mix lucky for you I got just the recipe.

Volrath - Yes Nalfein its the E.B.N.E. again.

Elina - Ooooooh

Sarah - Shiney

Hades - Yes I know its great.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-13-06, 04:31 PM		OOC: Since so many other people seem to be doing it:
Honorary Samurai Bruce Han “Chuck” Jarlot “Sparrow” [male half-vampire satyr (transformed male half-elf) former masked vigilante/former airship pirate/former hero/retired]
First a crimefighter in Sharn (earning the nickname “Chuck” somehow), then a “rob from the rich, give to the poor” airship pirate (calling himself Jarlot Sparrow) who earned an honorary samurai title from a Dhakaani noble, then a hero as he ferried supplies to a diseased Cyre. It was on one of these relief missions that his ship was hit by the Wild Magic, turning him into a half-vampire satyr.

Puck Jarlot [male memeovoric Large giant spider (transformed male half-elf) ninja chief/psychic cook]
Puck got all his training from their mother, Eberron’s greatest chief and ninja. The transformation brought on by the Wild Magic means that he no longer has the appendages necessary to manipulate cooking implements. However he developed psychic powers which have made up the difference, and as an added bonus he can now taste peoples’ minds.

Roosevelt Jarlot [male “teddy” bear (transformed male half-elf) carpenter/magitechie]
Obsessed with the technology of his age, Roosevelt J nearly got a scholarship to Arcanix, before someone decided that allowing pirates in was a bad idea. Instead RJ had to improve his skills on his father’s ship, resulting in the Forever Freedom being the fastest hunk of junk on Eberron. Unfortunately he’s had to avoid Caralot like the plague ever since he became cute and cuddly.

Gillamma (Seludrimam) Jarlot [female griffin (transformed male half-elf) wind controller/adventurer/devotee of Thyrs]
Seludrimam always wished he could fly. Controlling wind to steer his fathers ship was about as close as he got, until the Wild Magic turned him into a griffin. Still trying to adjust to being a female, she has recently taken up adventuring.

Darastrix Aesthyr [female dragon-blooded human (unknown if she was transformed) ninja chief]
Was hired to kill Bruce Jarlot while he was a masked crimefighter, but she fell in love with his charms and they fled Sharn together.

Mawerrkan d’Vidalis [male Orr (cannot transform into pure humanoid form) half-werewolf animal breeder/genetic mage]

Okarran d’Vidalis [female Orr half-werewolf animal breeder/genetic mage]

Jaela Darran(really d’Vidalis) [female half-werewolf/half-elf Keeper of the Silver Flame]

Johnny [illithid Most Supreme Devotee and Priest-type guy of Thyrs/extreme dude]
Really good friend of Caralot’s, a thrill-seeker who enjoyed going on sample-collecting missions for the rush.

Forever Freedom [Wild Magic-awakened wind-powered airship]

None of these people are well suited to the normal "HOLYFREAKINHELLWE'REGONNADIE!"-type plots this ship tends to attract. They come from a world where the bizarre is either easily understood or dismissed nonchalantly. They're not fearless, it's just that the things most likely to set them off would appear in a joke about how everyday life in our world is funny.

And make sure that Greyfeline only speaks in smilies. And if you're going to subject it to anything, it has to be spectacular otherwise Grey'd never fall for it.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-13-06, 04:44 PM		Ash gives a show of being completly unconcerned by Terec's words, tilts his head to to one side. ( In folowing section the Qutes are spoken in Terrec's own voice)
"Ah, I see. 'Whelp' is it? 'Removed' too? Underestimate me by all means my good sir, but pray draw the line before insulting me. As for what my intrests in the yong laidy are, since you have such burning curiosity in the matter why dont you first divilge your own? other wise all you need know is that if you mean her no ill you will find none in me. Oh and I have faced far worse than you, things whose names the pios will not speak. Now I belve the bold leader of this expedition has need of me, so unless there is anything of civil imprt you have to say, good day to you."

( OOC: Cypher I'll leave his resonce to you.)
cypher_zero

09-13-06, 06:23 PM		OOC: OK. Um... Yea. I'm just going to point out here that Terrek is an Uber. Level 50 something. He's at roughly the same power level as Satnak, and far more insidious. I'm going to ask you re-consider Ash's response, because right now, as it stands, Terrek would rip him limb from limb and paint the walls red with his blood then leave the corpse there as a warning to others that might dare cross him. And I'm not joking. If you were really trying to **** Terrek off, congratulations: You've done it.

Please re-consider Ash's response. He's no where near Terrek in the power department and has no major support from any of the other Ubers. I’m trying to be as respectful as I can in this, since you obviously missed something. If I’m not mistaken, Ash isn’t even over level 20; I highly doubt he’s faced anything even remotely close to Terrek, Sa’vor, Satnak, Kanatash, or any of the other’s listed as Ubers. I suggest you go back and read Terrek’s Wiki entry then think about what someone might say if they were face to face with someone that could and would rip them apart and eat their soul in a heartbeat.

For reference, here’s a link to Terrek’s wiki: http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Terrek
urial angel of death

09-13-06, 06:28 PM		OOC: True but Terrek wasted 10 levels in a class that can have all of its abilities negated with one spell (Souleater cries against someone with negative energy protection), he can't cast any spell above 7th level, and his artificer abilities take awhile to cast. In short Terrek's rampant multiclassing leads to a redmage affect. It's okay at first, nifty and useful in mid, but sucks compared to pures in high levels.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-13-06, 06:36 PM		OOC: OK. Um... Yea. I'm just going to point out here that Terrek is an Uber. Level 50 something. He's at roughly the same power level as Satnak, and far more insidious. I'm going to ask you re-consider Ash's response, because right now, as it stands, Terrek would rip him limb from limb and paint the walls red with his blood then leave the corpse there as a warning to others that might dare cross him. And I'm not joking. If you were really trying to **** Terrek off, congratulations: You've done it.

Please re-consider Ash's response. He's no where near Terrek in the power department and has no major support from any of the other Ubers. I’m trying to be as respectful as I can in this, since you obviously missed something. If I’m not mistaken, Ash isn’t even over level 20; I highly doubt he’s faced anything even remotely close to Terrek, Sa’vor, Satnak, Kanatash, or any of the other’s listed as Ubers. I suggest you go back and read Terrek’s Wiki entry then think about what someone might say if they were face to face with someone that could and would rip them apart and eat their soul in a heartbeat.

For reference, here’s a link to Terrek’s wiki: http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Terrek

(OOC: Lv 30 incase you had forgoten, (roge9, Egotist1, Elocater 10, Pyrokenetic 10) with resorces undisclsed as yet. Im not making this adversereal Cypher, but Ash is standing by this cos all I see Terec doing is clawing power to himself and manipulating other peoples chars, first Terra and Lisa, now Sara. and due to him knowng Tereks abilitys he has triks up his sleves. Terrec may be raw power, but ash is cunning, elusave and killing him costs Terrc Sara now. ) (also this sums up the whole too many ubers matter of it being hard to get established here, I am faced with looking like an ass or abandoning certain plotlines I had in mind.)
cypher_zero

09-13-06, 06:37 PM		OOC: Actually, if you read the wiki, his caster level is 24. Sure, he rampantly multiclasses, but he can still cast epic spells. Epic spells don't require spell slots or anything along those lines, just a really high spellcraft and Knowlege(arcana) - which he has as every class he has offers access to those skills. Even though he's not a pure sorcerer, he can still cast epic spells like one that was just a sorc. So: his Knowlege(Arcana) skill is something like 60 lets say. This means, according to the epic level handbook, page 55, that he can cast 6 epic level spells a day. He doesn't need to be a straight sorcerer to do that, just have a really high Knowlege(Arcana). You will note that most of the classes he has increase his caster level - to a total of 24. Check me if you wish, but I did the math.
.
rampant

09-13-06, 06:49 PM		OOC: Cool it off, guys.
--------------------------

JArlot - Stand down you blokes *command uber (for comedic purposes only)*

Ash - Yessir

Terrek - Yes captain.
---------------------------------
OOC: I'm going to regret that.
--------------------------------

Elina - What is it?

Hades - The Garuda Charm. It protects the wearer from fire, allows auto-quick casting of several bardic cantrips, and increases the amount of times per day a bard may use their magical songs.

Sarah - Perfect for auntie Serene.
---------------------------------

OOC: I'm done with this Urial.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-13-06, 06:53 PM		(OOC: Im all for cooling this off, but Ash is going to need allys for the plot Im starting after Rwarner is done with him, and Sara's one of the few crew who has any real conection to him.)
urial angel of death

09-13-06, 06:59 PM		OOC: D'oh I forgot renegade mastermaker raises caster level. Even so his casterlevel is 23 (8 from renegade master maker, 9 fleshwarper, 2 Cerebremancer, and 4 soc). Still Ash's psionic level 21 is almost equal to that. Besides if we really played by the rules on power as you are trying to do, Terrek can't be a renegade mastermaker because he is an aberration.
urial angel of death

09-13-06, 07:01 PM		The group returns to the ship. Volrath sets to getting the gifts rapped, the girls go off to bed after a long month's work, and Nalfien goes back to being lonely.
cypher_zero

09-13-06, 07:16 PM		(OOC: Lv 30 incase you had forgotten, (roge9, Egotist1, Elocater 10, Pyrokenetic 10) with resources undisclosed as yet. I’m not making this adversarial Cypher, but Ash is standing by this cause all I see Terrek doing is clawing power to himself and manipulating other peoples chars, first Terra and Lisa, now Sara. And due to him knowing Terrek’s abilities he has tricks up his sleeves. Terrek may be raw power, but ash is cunning, elusive and killing him costs Terrek Sara now. )
OOC: Regardless, that's still a 20 odd level difference. And please, read Terrek's wiki. If you don’t think Terrek is just as cunning, if not more-so, than you are sorely mistaken. Don’t ever think for a moment that Terrek is just raw power. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, Terrek is subtle, manipulative and powerful to boot. He rarely engages in a battle he’s not absolutely sure he can’t win and almost never takes a frontal assault. The only reason that Terrek would confront Ash in this manner is because of the Level difference. Ash doesn’t come close. Also, Sara’s loyalty obviously means far more to Ash than it does to Terrek and he would gladly give her up over such a slight. Ash insulted his honor. Terrek would never let that slide.

As far as getting established goes, you just have to try not to bump heads. Tread lightly and don’t try to do things to other people’s characters that they would not do themselves. That’s the number one rule. And yes, Terrek is a hard character to work with. So (apparently) is Ash.

Now, for the sake of keeping the ball rolling and to avoid either of us having to compromise our respective character’s personalities, I’m going to offer up this alternative (takes place just after Terrek's last words, before Ash’s response and the island raid scene):

IC:
A click is heard and a message plays through the air.

Message: All crew report to deck, we’re about to raid stuff!

Terrek: Hmm… We’re needed. (Glares at Ash.) Stay out of my way or I may just see how much the girl really means to you. (Teleport.)

OOC: Also, please, please, please, please, please, PLEASE! Check your spelling and syntax. It’s killing me.

OOC: D'oh I forgot renegade mastermaker raises caster level. Even so his caster level is 23 (8 from renegade master maker, 9 fleshwarper, 2 Cerebremancer, and 4 soc). Still Ash's psionic level 21 is almost equal to that. Besides if we really played by the rules on power as you are trying to do, Terrek can't be renegade mastermaker because he is and aberration.
Actually, he can. He took his levels of Renegade Mastermaker before he took his first level of Fleshwarper. The Fleshwarper class doesn’t require that you be a humanoid so in theory, living constructs are ok. So yea, Terrek is a humanoid/living construct/aberration.

Also, even though his magic abilities aren’t super powerful, he’s got all those other things. Those chains for instance are nasty.
.
urial angel of death

09-13-06, 07:25 PM		OOC: Taking a prestige class and then violating its prequisites always felt like cheating to me. Like the person who plays paladin and falls so he can get cool black guard abilities, then goes back to the side of good getting more paladin levels and keeping the black guard abilities.

These mega-powerful characters lead to a deterioration (sp) of story telling ability, because so many things are prevented by the ultra powerful character. It's the same complaint you had about Satnak.

One last thing I think epic spells are absolutely idiotic in their brokeness and can't be used in theory because this is 3.5 spell rules. So unless Nalfien helped him out no epic spells, or you have to abandon the rules.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-13-06, 07:27 PM		(OOC: fair compromise, infact later on I can see them working together, PM if your intrested in that posibility, pert of the problem is Rwarner hasnt as much a grip on ash or his history as he has on Terrec. Though thats my fault, but dang it I want to detail that. glad we could work it out.)
cypher_zero

09-13-06, 07:33 PM		OOC: Glad it works out ok all around.

Urial - Until they put out a new ELH, I'm just gonna stick with the rules as written. Also, I never complained about Satnak per-say, I devised an in-character solution to my problem with it; that solution being Serene. You see how well that worked out didn't you? I only suggest trying to find ways to work around the given problem as I did. Also, Terrek doesn't violate any of his classes. Look at it again. If you are talking about him becoming an Abberation and thereby violating the "humanoid" requirmernt of the Renegade Mastermaker, then I say this: That class "violates" itself by turning you into a Living Construct anyways. :P So nyeh!
.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-13-06, 07:34 PM		OOcat: This thread now suffers from three deficiencies:
1. Things to put übers in their place.

Silver: I think all Terrek needs is a little lovin'. See what happened when Terra and Lisa got together, or Satnak and Serene?

13: Kanatash and Kithle have got it down: just be a bastard (Magnificent in Kithle's case), don't try and be powerful.

2. And over reliance on stats and their consequences.

Bunny: Stats don't get you squat, you still got to tangle with me in the end.

Silver: Stats just screw up character creation.

13: Unless you want to argue about insane or innane rules. :D

3. NOT ENOUGH COMEDY!

If you ever need to consider what you are doing, remember my immortal words:
"Insanity is more fun, and requires fewer rules."—SilvercatMoonpaw
urial angel of death

09-13-06, 07:37 PM		OOC: Satnak is no longer destroying continents on a whim anymore is she?
Kaizer_Ryu

09-13-06, 08:11 PM		OOC: Remember cypher, Eled is Dyslexic. Check his sig. Even The Gram'mar is required to cut him some slack.

And, at least for me, the reason I don't really care for Terrek so much is that he's no fun. That's really all there is. Terra is a serious character, but you can easily use her in a humorous situation. Terrek, not really. When you said you were trying to reinvent him, I had hopes he'd be more open to comedic usage. I thought the dating service was a step in the right direction... *sigh*

IC:

Rose, Zella, Sarah, Elina, Ketler, and Michael sit around a table. A grid map of a dungeon is layed out, and several figurines are placed on it. Rose pulls out some dice and a few books. They are labeled Players Handbook, Dungeon Masters Guide, and Eberron Campaign Setting.

Elina: Why are we playing a historical game?

Rose: Because it's fun, it's realistic, and you get to learn something about our world.

Sarah: :rolleyes: Like how you've become ruler of the world five times over in previous games?

Rose: So I take a few liberties with history. So sue me.

Zella: You have yet to get the girl. Even in a game, you suck at heroics.

Rose: It's a low level setting! Going out an killing everything in sight isn't the way to win!

Ketler: But it's what we do all the time in real life...

Michael: *whispering* Don't upset the DM!

Rose: Now, you've read the Players Guide front to back, right?

Elina: Uh-huh. Mom was DMing a Ravenloft campaign before we came back.

Sarah: Can we start?

Rose: Fine.
Gladius_Lucix

09-13-06, 08:15 PM		Liam is working on his new project in the lab when something strange(r than ususal) happens.

Liam: What was that?

OOGladius: That would be me. I wanted to make your levels a little simpler, so I did a little retconning. I switched your inventor levels for just more artificer levels. Makes things simpler.

Liam: Oh, joy. :rolleyes:

OOGladius: Don't worry. It wasn't that major. Nothing else will change.

Liam: Thanks.

OOGladius: You're welcome. You'll still be a scum, at least until you get this next project done.

Liam: What exactly is it you have me working on?

OOGladius: You'll see. Just follow the inspiration. See ya!

OOGladius disappears with a poof. Liam sighs and returns to his slightly changed schematics and plans.
rampant

09-13-06, 08:20 PM		OOC: She would if Serene asked. Or if she thought it would be best for Serene. Personally I'd prefer if Ash and Terrek worked out their differences in a game of whack a redshirt.:D most creative non-lethal maiming wins.

Bunny - :ahem:

OORampant - After which we release the chili.

Bunny - :D
-----------------------------------------------

Satnak - Um, Terra, ...where Should I get clothes for the wedding. I've got formal robes, but that won't work for the bridesmaids. Also the robes might be a little ...Somber for the feel Serene and Caralot want. I'm a bit in over my head here, Serene put me in charge of the outfits for the Bridesmaids and such so, umm help.
--------------------------------------

OOC: I love messing whith her.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-13-06, 08:29 PM		OOC: Remember cypher, Eled is Dyslexic. Check his sig. Even The Gram'mar is required to cut him some slack.

Deep within his Inevitable proof bunker ( ok, so its not so much a bunker as a room where the entrance is marked 'exit' in order to thwart the mental processes of Inevitables), on top of a lonly hill side ( yes I know bunkers normaly go under the hill. But by the time I notised the misteak in the plans it was too late, blasted dwarven architects maping the hight not the depth... ) guarded by 3 loyal cats ( Who have been told that the Gram'mar wants to eat there tinned food, thus ensuing there loyalty ) OOC Eled breathes a sigh of relief and turns off the warning klaxon (which will be completly unnotised till his sister turns off her sterio and stops drowning out his TV from across the hall and through 2 doors ) 'wish they'd told me it was going easy on me...'

(OOC: I would like to apologise to all who are bothered by my spelling, I do try to catch the misteakes but its like selling smoke by the netfull. )
Kaizer_Ryu

09-13-06, 08:50 PM		Terra: Well, Igor did an amazing job with the dresses in my wedding. You remember what he made for you. I think you looked wonderful in it. I don't see why he wouldn't out do himself for your wedding.

Satnak: I forgot about that...

Terra: His prices are quite reasonable. The dresses are lightweight, easy to move in, and... *leans in, whispering* ...quite easy to repair in case of "accidents"... :devil:

Satnak: :blush: :blush: :blush:

Terra: :D It never ceases to amuse me how you can face down gods without batting an eye, yet you go bright red when anyone mentions the most intimate actions with the one you love.

Satnak: I was raised as a warrior, not as a woman. I can't help it.

Terra: ;) Serene'll get you straightened out on that front.

Satnak: :blush: :blush: :blush:

OOC: It is fun to mess with her, isn't it? :D

That was very funny, Eled. Maybe we should create and Inevitable of Annoying Siblings.

OORei: Mom says your not allowed to attack me with beings of pure law simply because it amuses you.

OOKaizer: :( Awwwwww....
Gladius_Lucix

09-13-06, 08:57 PM		(OOC: I would like to apologise to all who are bothered by my spelling, I do try to catch the misteakes but its like selling smoke by the netfull. )
Here's a suggestion for you, to help with the spelling: Type up the post in a word processor and use the spellchecker before putting it up.

----

Liam: :nonono: Darn OOGladius. No help at all.

Duct Tape Swarm: If I understand correctly, wouldn't the "inspiration" he mentioned be him helping you?

Liam: Be quiet, you.

Liam goes back to brainstorming on the paper spread all over his desk.

Liam: The overflow Weirsan output over in Caralot's Eberron was seemingly random. If I can somehow control that...

Liam perks up, clears off the desk and grabs a sheaf of blank paper. Flipping through as the need strikes him, he starts drawing, drafting, scribbling, and doodling all over it.
Rei32491

09-13-06, 09:09 PM		One last thing I think epic spells are absolutely idiotic in their brokeness and can't be used in theory because this is 3.5 spell rules. So unless Nalfien helped him out no epic spells, or you have to abandon the rules.
Nalfein: :rolleyes: Pffff. Yeah right. Like I'd help anyone but myself.

-----
Nalfein and Volrath are talking in Nalfein's room, after a bit Volrath sees a crappy looking chest in the corner of the room.

Volrath: (walking over to it) What's inside?

Nalfein: I'm not gonna say.

Volrath: Ok, I'll see for myself.

Nalfein: Try all you want, you won't be able to open it.

Volrath: We'll see.

Tries to open it, doesn't open.

Tries to blast it open, doesn't open.

So Volrath proceeds to attempt to open it in ways allowable by the laws of Physics, and some that make the laws of Physics screem in agony.

Volrath: *pant* WTF! What is keeping me out!

Nalfein: It's purpose will be explanded at a later time.

Volrath: ...I hate stuff like this. :mad:
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-13-06, 09:29 PM		Silver: Know what Satnak needs? :devil:

Bunny: I thought you enjoyed it when people got nervous about sex. :bored:

Silver: Oh, wait :D I do.
*********
Kanatash is floating along a hallway, when a hippie comes screaming past him, followed closely by Caralot's mother holding a pail of soapy water.

Kanatash: What was that?

Caralot (appearing out of nowhere): My mom decided that anyone aboard this ship at our wedding has to be spotlessly clean.

Kanatash: Why? :confused:

Caralot: Hello, she's a mom……but then I suppose you've never had to live with one like her.

A larger group of hippies now runs the other way, pursude again by Darastrix who is this time accompanied by a soapy water elemental.

Hippie: Run! It's The Mom!

Caralot: I think Roosevelt (mine) summoned that cleaning elemental up. Gillamma is using her wind-controlling powers to suck the oxygen out of the places the hippies are staying so they can't smoke anything, Puck's replaced all their munchies with wholesome veggies, and my dad………

Caralot's dad walks past, his arm around a young hippie.

Bruce: <completely boring story about how he once fought a villain known as "The Man">

Kanatash: I still don't get it. Why have you never talked about these people?
rampant

09-13-06, 10:10 PM		Elina - What'cha doing?

Chalky - Stealing Pholly's stuff to make paint, I figure a white base coat and some green Ivy trim oughtta fit the occasion.

Elina - Can I help?

Chalky - Sure get Jingo and NJ26 to set you up, they should be passing out instructions to the squirrels.

Elina - What are we painting?

Chalky - The whole ship, including extradimensional spaces, and the bar.

Elina - I'll go get Sarah.
----------------------------------

Tirmek - Please Sarah help me.

Sarah - :rofl:

Tirmek is trying to slow his mother's progress by pullling on her robe. Its not working as well as he'd hope.

Ketty - Tirmek stop it.

Tirmek - I enjoy breathing mother.

Elina - Hey Tirmek, wanna help us repaint the ship while no one's looking?

Tirmek - Well this is out of my hands anyway. So yeah I gotta see this.
--------------------------------

Rose - GEt me down from here, I'm almost out of flame protection spells.

Earl - THis is vengence for hot dog night.

Rose - Thats cold.

Earl - No it isn't, this is *ray of frost*
rwarner3701

09-13-06, 10:36 PM		Darian and Jarlot make their way though the complex connected to the small jail down some stairs into the basement, and into a wide hallway. The hallway has four doors, a set of bathrooms at the beginning, a small door with a rusted handle and a placard that reads "Janitorial Logistics", and finally a large door almost as wide as the hallway. This door is bolted shut and has places for four keys as well as a warning sign. "Authorized personnel only"

Walking down to the janitor's door Jarlot reaches to the groud and grabs hold of a small piece of thread that is sticking out from it. Pulling the thread he revels an intricate key connected to it. Taking the key he places his hand on the sign and press the J A R in Janitorial and the L O T in Logistics before inserting the key and unlocking the door.

Jarlot: The treasure is this way.

Darian: What is behind the other door?

Jarlot: The sanitation engineer's closet/office.

Darian: ... umm... why?

Jarlot: Are you kidding some of the chemicals are dangerous. They have warning labels and everything.

Darian: ...

They step inside to another hallway that bends a few feet away. Around the bend is a gigantic room filled with everything gold and jewel encrusted that could ever be made from gold and jewels, and some things that couldn't.

Darian: That is a lot of loot.

Jarlot: I know. Shame we couldn't use it for decorations. Something about being to gaudy and high security costs. I was told the rich want subtle expense. They will eat off a 10,000 gold table as long as it doesn't look like a 10,000 gold table. (Points to table with a gold frame and a stone like top embedded with gems.)

Darian: We are going to need some help from the rest of the crew.

Jarlot: Alright you go get them just prop the door open on your way out, there are a few special items I want for my self.

Darian heads back to the surface to find the others and some bags of holding while Jarlot moves to the back of the room. Against the wall he finds a safe which he slowly dials a ten number combination into and swings it open.

Jarlot: There you are my greatest treasures.

Jarlot takes out a stack of D&D books a pair of glasses, and what would appear to be a magical tome labeled Journal.

----
Squishy and Bolt Tooth Tony are making there way down the beach searching for someone to rob when they find a gnome lounging in a chair with his eyes closed. Drawing a dagger Bolt Tooth Tony walks up and stands over the gnome blocking the sunlight.

Gnome: (opening his eyes) What is the meaning of this?

Bolt Tooth Tony: Sorry guv, but we 'ere to rob you.

Gnome: I won't allow that. Now what are you going to do?

Bolt Tooth Tony: My blade can help loosen either those purse strings or your entrials.

Gnome: Well in that case...

The gnome reaches for a pouch at his side. Then out of no where Terrek appears his chains ripping the gnome apart as his soul is consumed.

Bolt Tooth Tony: Ye bloody wanker, he was gonna give us the gold.

Terrek: You... simpleton, he was about to kill you both faster than you could comprehend.

Squishy: If that is so why did you save us?

Terrek: It wasn't my intention... I detected the aroma of his soul from the ship. Now that you mention it... this accident would make you beholden to me wouldn't it?

Bolt Tooth Tony: I suppose.

Terrek: Splendid, his stachel isn't filled with gold, but it still contains... opulence. Bring it along. I suggest we return to the rendezvous and see if the others have been more succesful.
rampant

09-14-06, 12:40 AM		Ketty - I was hoping to find you first.

Serene - :eek: Ketty! dont sneak up on me like that.

Ketty - Like what?

Serene - nevermind what brings you here?

Ketty - :D (places book on table)

Serene - Are those...?

Ketty - *nods*:D

Serene and Ketty - :evillaugh
--------------------------------

Tirmek - Tell me again how I got stuck doing the outer hull?

Sarah - Because you were showing off a meld that lets you stick to ceilings.

Tirmek - Smart alek

Sarah - Show off
--------------------------------

Rose - Someone let me down from here, they're spicing me!

Squirrel in chef's hat - Squeaken Squeak (more thyme)
----------------------------------

Satnak - IIIIIIIIGGGOOOOOOOORRRRRRR, First my cat now Igor Where is everyone?
Crystalforged

09-14-06, 01:30 AM		OOC: Sorry about taking so long I was playing in Cypher's game. Anyways...



IC: Kanatash: I wouldn't worry about cleaning the hippies, they'll be gone all too soon. I just got my last pint of blood of the innocent through mail order. I'm ready to draw the summoning circle now.

Caralot: So what are you summoning?

Kanatash: Not what, but who. He is the ultimate foe of hippies everywhere and the master of their destruction. Come, I was just about to add the blood.

He strolls into a nearby extradimensional pocket where he pours the jar of blood onto an already drawn pentagram. Acid green smoke billows as it touches the circle and a shadowy figure begins to materialize. Slowly the image clears to reveal, a short, fat, and extremely poorly animated child who appears to be around 10 years of age. He wears a red jacket with a blue and yellow stocking cap.

Child: Why am I here? Screw you guys, I'm going home.

Kanatash: Please, master Cartman, I beg your assistance. The hippie infestation upon this vessel is apocoliptic, their numbers have already exceeded woodstock.

Cartman: I hate hippies! I mean, the way they always talk about "protectin' the earth" and then drive around in cars that get poor gas mileage and wear those stupid bracelets - I hate 'em! I wanna kick 'em in the nuts!

Kanatash: It is as you say master.

Cartman: Quiet you. Respect mah Authoritaw!

Kanatash: Of course master.
rampant

09-14-06, 01:58 AM		OOC: Do you mind if Chalky eats him when Kanatash is done with him. I have the urge to do something mean to Cartman.
--------------------------------

Igor - Yeth mith

Satnak - There you are, I need clothes for the Wedding. The outfits for the Bridesmaids, and bridesgrooms, You'll have to ask Serene and Caralot for the list. Also I need a wedding dress, my family colors are these shades of brown and grey (hands him two strips of fabric), but try to make it something apropriate, my robes are far to somber. Make me look like a freaking Jedi. So you'll probably want to use them as secondary colors, unless you have a better idea.

Igor - Yeth mith, anth thongrathulations.

---------------------------

Sparking and Beeping

Kratwe - I still think we should push to have their wedding at the island.

Illis - Do you think tha would do anything but **** her off?

Kratwe - I like ******* her off:tantrum:

Rixle - 20 questions for the ceremony.

Tendra (warmind10/divine crusader10 of dol Arrah) - Satnak in a dress.

Rixle - How...

Telfon - Given How many times you tell that story:rolleyes:

Gisen (human male about four years old, red head Psion (egoist) 1) - This place smells funny.

Illis - Thats just the paint drying son.

Tendra - Stay close honey this place can be dangerous.

Gisen - Yes mother.

Disarray - Its not that bad.

Levy - MOVE! Forbes is getting Claustrophobic.

Forbes - There is no trap, its just people, its not a trap.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-14-06, 07:51 AM		Forbes - There is no trap, its just people, its not a trap.
13: This is the Forgotten Freedom, the whole thing's a trap.

Bunny: Cartman is the foe of all hippies?

Silver: :mad: Just so long as he's gone once he's done.

Bunny: Seconded.

13: Thirded.

Silver: Is this double-wedding thing a good idea? I mean, one of ours is going to get married, Greyfeline is going to be pulling out all the stops.

13: Not to mention all the other guests Caralot invited. (hefts a huge bag of invites)

Silver: And I still haven't even planned out the wedding night! :eek:

Bunny: As if it'll be any different from any other "night" they've spent together.

Silver: That reminds me, got to go check up on Marish.

13: Caralot's on that. The kind of mixes your getting in that litter, it's like her destiny.
rwarner3701

09-14-06, 10:26 AM		Ash and Aurixirthos are wandering further inland searching for something worth the effort to steal. They find some cabins but all of them are empty despite some furnishings and a few trinkets that might not be worth anything. Getting bored, Aurixirthos runs his hands along the outside of one of the huts they have searched leaving trails of fire along it's sides.

Aurixirthos: What do you think, first to burn to the ground wins?

Ash: My friend, this challenge seems worthy of my efforts.

Aurixirthos continues to make his way around the outside of his hut while Ash leaps to the top of another hut and begins to remove a section of the roof. Once he has cleared a good sized hole he jumps down inside and begins to set the furnishings on fire.

Outside, Aurixirthos continues to add to his fire and watches as smoke begins to billow out of the top of the hut Ash is working on. The smoke is replaced by a gout of flame shooting out of the hole like a torch as Ash steps back outside.

Ash: Fire is a tool my friend, it becomes all the more effective when properly used.

Aurixirthos: So it would seem.

They stand back to watch the building burn as Jarlot Senior approaches from behind them.

Jarlot Senior: What do you think you are doing?

Aurixirthos: Fire... We couldn't find anything worth taking and we got bored.

Jarlot Senior: Well stop it. If you burn everything to the ground it will take them years to rebuild. We can't rob a construction site.

Ash: Sir forgive us, the fire is a temptress always calling to be released.

Jarlot Senior: Well, get these fires out and lets get back to the beach and find the others.

----
Alkran walks out of Reman’s office looking exhausted and begins to make his way stumbling down the hall.

Alkran: Such a long meeting… so hard to understand… GROWWT!

Alkran: Alkran, the party in the first part would like permission of the captain, the party in the second part to collapse on the floor. If the party in the second part gives the party in the first part permission the object in question will sustain damages requiring…

Alkran collapses on the floor of the hallway which gives a noticeable groan to his impact but remains undamaged.

Below the deck

Roosevelt: Good thing I listened to Jarlot when he said to reinforce the floor outside Reman’s office. That man could talk even me to death.

OOC: The raiding party is on the way back to the beach to meet up and then a few more posts before they head back to the ship. And an incredibly late manbearpig referance. Reman has Alkran's testimony if you want to do anything with it Kaizer.
cypher_zero

09-14-06, 10:27 AM		OOC: Kaizer - I intend to do some more humorous stuff with Terrek eventually, but the more serious things will always be my forte. Also, the dating service thing didn't really go anywhere and kinda died. Feel free to bring it back to life if you wish (I could see some funny things happening with Terrek trying to set up some of Caralot's family...). But yea, I do intend to do more funny things, that was actually part of the reason that I had Terrek join the FF2 crew. We'll see how it goes.

cypher
rampant

09-14-06, 10:29 AM		John - i feel pretty

Tirmek - Whats wrong with this thing?

John - O so Pretty

Chalky - You mean outside the usual:P

John - So pretty, and witty, and gay

Sarah - I think the fumes have gone to his head.

John - And I pity

Elina - Not as good as auntie serene but not awful.

John - Any girl who isn't me today.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-14-06, 10:36 AM		Forever Freedom: I got hit by magic that makes Caralot look like a plastic surgeon on a slow day, and even I'm not that strange.
urial angel of death

09-14-06, 12:58 PM		Back in his room Volrath has gathered all of his uncle’s missing blood of the innocent. He has drawn a massive triangle inscribed summoning circle with it. At each corner there is a small feminine statue.

Volrath: He might be ****** that I used it all up, but hopefully he likes the result enough to keep Terra from killing me in a permanent fashion.

Volrath’s voice becomes distant as he begins chanting.

Volrath: Oh great lord of magic… He who is three… Almighty destroyer… Master of the Light of Ruination… Come forth!

From the circle springs an impossibly tall grotesque looking tower. The figure descending from it appears to be moving slowly, but from the distance he covers it is obviously not so. The figure lands in front of Volrath. The figure’s face is covered in white greasepaint and has ornate red and pink designs around his eyes. His clothing is that of a noble, but much flashier and colorful. They could almost be described as the cloths of a clown, though no clown outfits were made so finely or created with such expensive material.

Figure: *instead of looking at Volrath’s face is staring a few inches above it* Why have you summoned me?

Volrath: One of your pupils is being wed. In this realm he is known as Kanatash.

Figure: Lead on.
rampant

09-14-06, 03:23 PM		OORampant - A little warning next time.

Volrath - I don't answer to you.

OORampant - True, but I meant warning Satnak.

CRASHBOOMVARIOUSRANDOMCHARGINGNOISESRUMP LESTILTSKIN

Volrath - ooooooohhh mommy:eek:
urial angel of death

09-14-06, 04:28 PM		OOC: Rampant I take it that you know who he is. :D Also what was with the RUMPLESTILTSKIN part? Finally why did she fire before charging up?
rampant

09-14-06, 05:21 PM		OOC: I know the kinds of forces Volrath and Kanatash work with. Hastur, Nartholyep, Chthulu (before he became :coolcthul ) and such, plus various dealkyer, but no I'm not sure who it is specifically this time. The noise is just her muscling her way to the scene she hasn't fired anything yet. As for rumplestilstkin...:P
---------------------------------

Rose - Oh come on this isn't funny anymore,...this glaze is sticky.
----------------------------------

:coolcthul - Come on Terra don't be that way.

Terra - I'm enjoying this as much as....

Kithle - :rofl::rofl::rofl:

Terra - Almost as much as Kithle is.

Hippy - Must have joint...., purple haze.... fading...

Dirty hippy - *barfing in the toilets*

Damn dirty hippy - nooooooo they took my duckies.
urial angel of death

09-14-06, 05:27 PM		Volrath: Satnak please don't do anything rash.

OOC: Sorry but I really suck at playing other people's characters specifically Satnak so Rampant could you make her relpy.
rampant

09-14-06, 05:32 PM		Satnak - Rash? how is stuffing your spine through your empty head rash? its not like you use anything thats already in there.

Volrath - owwwwwwww:weep:

Figure - (i.h.h. burned )

Satnak - I damned near blew the entire section of the hull out you moron!!. Warn me before you bring your friends beyond creation through would you. Excuse, I take it you're here as part of Kanatash's party, Will you have the fish, vegan, or the chili?
----------------------------

OOC: Those of you who remember the old Satnak, must be wondering why Volrath is still in one piece (albeit mangled) and the figure is still manifest, this is Serene's calming influence.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-14-06, 05:54 PM		OOC: Those of you who remember the old Satnak, must be wondering why Volrath is still in one piece (albeit mangled) and the figure is still manifest, this is Serene's calming influence.
Silver: Essentially: she gets a woman, her agression gets whipped.

13: Is that your department or mine?
rampant

09-14-06, 06:06 PM		OOC: That and now there is something besides inflicting horrible suffering and death on her mind. So her imagination is somewhere else entirely.

Silver - :w00t:

Bunny - :mad:
urial angel of death

09-14-06, 06:08 PM		figure: Would you happen to have any mages or magical creatures I could suck the essence out of? *turns to Volrath* Get up.

Black energy radiates from Volrath. His spine is violently ripped from his skull. Then The back of his head is opened and grey matter newly formed by the dark energy is place within.

Volrath: Sweet Hells that hurt! :mad: I would have regenerated in a few seconds.

Figure: It was taking too long. Besides there's sand on my boots.
rampant

09-14-06, 06:14 PM		Satnak - Thats another one for the chili then.
Gladius_Lucix

09-14-06, 09:09 PM		Liam stands before a large magitech contraption. He looks rather proud.

Duct Tape Swarm: What's that?

Liam: I call it a Weirsan Cascade Engine. Within a specially designed chamber, it uses a small amount of Weirsan to generate a slightly strange effect of a very long duration, which generates its own Weirsan, which is used to add another such effect. The process slowly builds, and eventually it'll be stranger than Xoriat and Kythri put together in there.

Duct Tape Swarm: Impressive. When will it get that strange?

Liam: By my calculations, if I don't syphon off any power, which I plan to do, it will get that strange as soon as Kanatash is done letting the universe "ripen."

Duct Tape Swarm: So it's not something to worry about. Good. So, why did you make this?

Liam: Well, the plans for my next project require Werisan Arcs to function properly, and this will provide enough power to keep me from needing to go to Caralot's Eberron each time I need to use it.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-14-06, 09:15 PM		OOC: I was wondering when you were gonna bring him aboard, urial. :D

IC:

Following the large magical signature, Terra arrives in Volrath's room to see him fervently cleaning sand from the boots of a strange individual. The almost clown-like appearance would be comical, but something about this person makes it work. Hearing her enter, the figure looks up at her.

Figure: :eek: You!

Terra: :twitch: *TWITCH* :twitch:

*KRACKAFWOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!*

A large hole forms in the wall behind the figure as he passes through it and the 30 others behind it at amazing speed, propelled by what can only be described as an instictive reaction on Terra's part.

Figure: *from somewhere in the ship* Ow. Ow. Ouch. Ow. Owie. Ow. Ouch. Ow...

Terra: :twitch: I have no idea why I just did that...

OOKaizer: He was your nemesis in another reality. He's also the reason you hate being manipulated so much. It's one of the few things I took from that universe that I intended to keep.

Volrath: :bigeyes: Please don't kill me. :bigeyes:

OOKaizer: It was funny, so you get to live.

Volrath: :w00t:

OOC: Anyone know who the figure is, yet?

BTW, rwarner, I'm a bit stuck on ideas for the court thing. Besides, I don't think now's the appropriate time. If anything, I can always claim the courts were backed up. :D
rampant

09-14-06, 09:25 PM		Satnak - So i was supposed to vaporize him?
Kaizer_Ryu

09-14-06, 09:33 PM		OOKazier: No. She just has residual issues about that particular bad guy. When I began expanding on her character, I took the whole "hates being manipulated" idea from her namesake. I couldn't quite separate the feeling from the reason as much as I'd have liked too.

Terra: :mad: You just thought it was funny, didn't you?

OOKaizer: That too.

Volrath: He's the best BBEG in Final Fantasy EVER!

Ketler: *from somewhere above them* NO HE WASN'T! SEPHIROTH COULD KICK HIS ASS!!!

Volrath: Quiet you! At least this one actually succeeded in destroying the world!

Satnak: Oh, great. More otaku.
urial angel of death

09-14-06, 10:01 PM		The figure stands up from the rubble. He brushes the debris off himself. He then looks directly into Terra's eyes. (something he hasn't done to anyone on the ship yet)

Figure: You know I really was expecting something more impressive from you. I wasn't even in my true form and you failed to deal a fatal blow.

Satnak: Who are you?

Figure: I am the master of the gods, he who is three, and one of the few examples of true evil left. I little lady am Kefka. *dramatic pause*

Satnak: Who?

Kefka: :eek:
Rei32491

09-14-06, 10:14 PM		OOC: Crap. urial posted while I was typing. Meh. Just go with it.

IC:

Nalfein hears the racket from his room, he opens the door to see whats going on and sees the crumpled form of a clown-like person.

Nalfein:...CLOWN MUST DIE!!!

He starts to summon a Fireball.

Nalfein: *sniff* Wait...this one has magic on him...*sniff*...lots of magic...*sniff* an entire world worth of it!

Figure: *stirring* What happened?

Nalfein: *a crazed look in his eyes* The magic shall be MINE!!!

He leaps on the figure and starts to suck at his neck...but doesn't get anything.

Figure: WTF!?! GET OFF!

Nalfein: MY MAGIC!

Figure: YOU ASKED FOR IT! LIGHT OF RUINATION!!!

Nalfein: COUNTER SPELL!

OORei: Counter Spell? :confused: Since when have you countered anything?

Nalfein: Since now!

Figure: GET HIM OFF ME!

OORei:...no. :P

Cheese: I. Like. Chocolate. Milk.

All other entities: Uh-oh...
Gladius_Lucix

09-14-06, 10:16 PM		On today's episode of "Why Hasn't It Happened Yet?"...

Death Paper is wandering the corridors, searching for a bird feeder that hadn't been pillaged yet. As he looks around, a roll from the Duct Tape Swarm rolls by. Seeing each other, they stop to chat.

Death Paper: Hey, cousin.

Duct Tape Roll: Hey. How've things been?

Death Paper: Not too bad. I'm looking for a bird feeder, at the moment. You?

Duct Tape Roll: I'm fine. Doing some errands for Liam. Hey, what do you think of a Weirsan powered Bird Feeder?

Death Paper: What's the point?

Duct Tape Roll: I have no idea. Could be interesting, though.

Death Paper: I guess.

Duct Tape Roll: I'll slip the plans into his "To Do" pile. Well, see ya around.

Death Paper: Bye.

The two constructs continue on their way.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-14-06, 10:21 PM		Figure: You know I really was expecting something more impressive from you. I wasn't even in my true form and you failed to deal a fatal blow.

Terra: *raised eyebrow* With everything my Entity says about you, I'm less than intimidated, clown boy. Besides, what did you expect with a reactionary shot?

Kefka: *in the corner drawing circles on the ground* She doesn't know me? :raincloud

Cheese: *tapping Kefka on the back* I. Like. Ceeeeeeeeereal.
rampant

09-14-06, 11:11 PM		Satnak - Seriously should I smush him, or what?

Terra - I think we can find a better idea.

Satnak - So we give him the Krozan treatment?

Terra - :rolleyes: I'll deal with him, If he gets uppity I'll give you a call. Go Igor is probably ready to take measurements.

Satnak *exits*

Kefka - how could she not know who I am:confused:

Terra - Simple She's been busy with heavies like The Serpent of Forbidden Wrath, Toren the Seventh, or Ariajni Bringer of Khyber. You know important threats.
-----------------------

OOC: That oughtta shatter his poor fragile little ego.
-------------------------

Igor - Yeth mith Satnak I'm reathy tho thake your measuremenths. I think thath you'th look lovely in thomething Reniassancey. I think Therene will love the bodice espethially.

Satnak - Whats a bodice?
Charles Phipps

09-15-06, 02:34 AM		OOC: I loved the Ravenloft gaming session with Rose BTW. It was awesome and its such a fun concept.
Charles Phipps

09-15-06, 02:55 AM		OOC: Here's the Elin, Rose, and Sarah visit the Hellsing universe thread I wanted to pull much earlier. I hope it's up to your standards Volrath.

It's also somewhat expanded to include pretty much every horror reference ever.

I'd appreciate comments on this post since this one of my longer posts and people are welcome to include other people visiting to talk about various horror cliches and mockery.

;-)

***

Elin: Mommy is going to be MAD for you taking us away from our training Uncle Rose!

Sarah: We have to wear those weights ALL the time!

Rose: Well kids, today I'm going to teach you about something you need to know that's important. Just don't tell your mommies that I kidnapped you...again.

Sarah: Lisa still wants to kill you for stealing our alternate universe doubles from their timeline.

Elin: She says we're too young to know about alternate universes....and sex.

Rose: Well today you're visiting an alternate universe...to learn about THE UNDEAD.

*CRACK BOOM*

Elin: The undead?

*CRACK BOOM*

Sarah: COOL! UNDEAD! UNDEAD! UNDEAD!

*CRACK BOOM*
*CRACK BOOM*
*CRACK BOOM*

Rose: In any case, this is the World of Darkness.

Elin: The World of Darkness?

Rose: Yes, it's an angsty dimension that was recently abandoned by some White Wolves because it filled with too many twinks and poseurs. I'd like to introduce our newest crew members that will be serving as our guides while we travel through this dimension.

Arucard: I am the most badass creature that has ever walked the Earth and exist to do nothing but kill everything wearing my crimson trenchcoat, tophat, and holding these two incredibly silver handguns.

Elin: :shock:

Selena: Hi, I'm a leather catsuit wearing British girl whom exists to kill absolutely every werewolf I can get my hands on. Except when I fall in love with one whose also a vampire. Then I shall angst about having been turned against my will as a poor young Medieval peasant girl. There shall probably be some sex scenes. I have unrevealed bisexual tendencies.

Sarah:....okay.

Sword: My mother was bitten by a vampire.

Sarah: And?

Sword: I'm black.

Sarah: That's it?

Sword: I'm really upset about the vampire part. Now be quiet while I pose here.

Rose: As one can see, the World of Darkness has it's ups and downs.

Elin: I'm looking for the ups parts. I'm not terribly comfortable around the werewolf killing girl.

Rose: Now Now, you're just upset because you haven't met the last member of our team.

Muffy: HEY!

Sarah: OOOOOO! A CHEERLEADER! CHEERLEADERS ARE AWESOME!

*Sarah bounces up and down*

Rose: In any case, as the world's greatest vampire hunter extraorinaire. I'm ready to get started in showing you around town. I regret to inform you that Dick Night the Vampire-Police Detective won't be joining us or Klopeck the Night Hunter since both of them ended up dead at the hands of a Werewolf-Changeling-Vampire-Angel-Robot. Don't mention you're werewolf-celestial ninjas with lesbian parents or you'll never be taken seriously on this planet.

Sarah: We'd be hunted down and killed?

Rose: No, worse, banned for being munchkins.

Arucard: I want to blow my own head clean off, just so I can watch myself regenerate.

Elin: :shock:

Rose: The first thing you need to learn about is Zombies.

Elin: Mom already told us about those. They're mindless undead animated by evil necromancers...like Andrea.

Rose: Ah, but did you know their preferred habits?

Elin: Uhh...

Sarah: Can we go to a shopping mall? I want to buy some pom poms!

Rose: Yes Sarah! You're absolutely correct unlike you're know-it-all brainiac of a sister. A shopping mall IS the preferred habitat of zombies!

Sarah: Huh?

Rose: Let's go see.

*the group heads into the Dead Rising mall*

Rose: Now what are a zombies natural weaknesses?

Elin: OH MY GOD! WHAT ARE THOSE THINGS! THEY'RE HORRIBLE!

Rose: Oh those are consumers. The zombies are the decaying guys behind them. Sarah?

Sarah: Ooooo! Awesome lipstick!

Rose: Yes Sarah, lipstick can be used to kill a zombie. So can lawn mowers, toasters, showerheads, and other common household items. Specifically the Chain saw.

*pulls out one and starts using it despite the fact it shouldn't be filled with gas*

Arucard: *manical screaming gunfire ensues*

Selena: *same*

Sword: *sword swinging craziness*

Rose: Next on our list is....Elin are you okay?

*Elin is splattered with gore and shaking uncontrollably*

Sarah: Awesome, I found a Justin Timberlake CD I hadn't owned before? He's so awesome!

Elin: My...sanity....

Rose: Next, we're going to talk about my favorite subject in VAMPIRES. Vampires come in three varities. I like to term these varieties to be Euro-Trash, Punk Thugs, and Angsty Bishounens.

Sarah: Bishounen.

Rose: Now we'll test out our vampire hunting skills on Lestradt.

Lestradt: Aren't I just the ambigiously sexual Pretty boy?

Rose: Now this is entirely for you being an annoying **** and not your ambigious sexuality, which is entirely okay.

*Lestradt starts screaming as he's horribly mutilated with a chainsaw, gunshots, katana blows, spells, stakes, silver bullets, flame, and about ten thousand methods of killing a vampire*

Elin: OH MY GOD!

Sarah: Cool! That was like House of Thousand Corpses my boyfriend took me too!

Rose: YOU ARE TOO YOUNG TO HAVE A BOYFRIEND!

Sarah: Its your son Lilly.

Rose: Oh right. Carry on.

Elin: GAH! INCEST!

Sarah: We're not even the same GENUS.

Rose: Well at least Terrek is watching the Forgotten Freedom back for me.

Elin: Isn't he the god-guy?

Rose: Yeah, Terrek believes if he sets a good example by not succumbing to the Chaos Magic then everyone else will follow suit. He seems to have not gotten the message its crazy forever.

Sarah: Then why doesn't he just kill you all?

Rose: Let's hope he never figures that out. In any case, we have only one major monster left to cover. The noble werewolf.

Sarah and Elin: :frown:

Rose: Now now, its important you learn about your culture. We'll journey to your natural habitat for that. LONDON!

Elin: Mom said werewolves were a part of nature.

Rose: Not only part of nature, its actually their job to KILL PEOPLE IN HYPER-VIOLENT WAYS FOR NATURE!

Sarah: Can I be a welsh-corgi werewolf?

Rose: Those are called Glass Walkers.

Elin: This doesn't sound right.

Rose: Yes, you're all hippie eco-terrorists whom hate a company called Pentex more than anything for Gaia. Remember, Druidism is just an excuse to KILL STUFF FOR NATURE and bind spirits.

Sarah: Can't I switch to being a cat girl? I want to be cute not scary.

Rose: I'll go check the WW supplements on Bete.
urial angel of death

09-15-06, 07:29 AM		OOC: The saddest thing was I was able to identify all of those characters. Must purge the angst from my system by... What is the polar oppposite of angst. Ah yes I have to play a Pokemon game.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-15-06, 08:28 AM		OOcat: Terra, Tifa, Kefka, Sephiroth. I am so out of the loop.

13: I don't think that's a problem.

Silver: Where's Bunny?
******
In the World of Darkness:

Vampire: Oh, woe is me! I am angsty, and regret my undead life.

Bunny: I'd be happy to oblige. :devil:

Pulls out a huge silver mallet….
urial angel of death

09-15-06, 08:58 AM		Disclaimer: Rose’s views on werewolves are his and his alone. They are not shared by Charles Phippes, the other posters, Wizards of the Coast, or its parent company Hasbro.
Rose’s tips on vampire and zombie slaying should not be followed under any circumstances. For real undead killing tips consult the Zombie Hunter’s Survival Guide or your local church. Wizards of the Coast is not responsible for any death, lawsuit, or permanent injury sustained by yourself, friends, family, innocent bystanders, or the undead from following Rose’s instructions.
Finally Elina views on relationships are not meant to often our viewers in Utah or the hill country. Please do not sue us.
rampant

09-15-06, 10:59 AM		Kithle - Dammit who let the captain off the elemental ring, I USED DUCT TAPE FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!
---------------------------------------

Lisa - FOUND YOU

Rose, Elina, and Sarah - *FEAR*
------------------------------------

Satnak - hcseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Igor - Suth ith in.

Satnak - Why was that necesarry

Igor - You'll thee
------------------------------------

Serene - :rofl: she's so cute

Ketty - Here she is shaping her first meld.

Serene - I don't think Dragon Fire mask goes on your arm?

Ketty - Try telling 6 year old Satnak that.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-15-06, 11:11 AM		Alucard takes out 4,000 zombies (ghouls) with less than 10 bullets.

OOKaizer: :D :D :D You are SO AWESOME!!!! :D :D :D

Alucard: :bored: You're only just noticing this?

Celes: I miss my days as a human, yet I cannot help but be enthralled by my un-life as a vampire. I also secretly harbor feelings for my master. Plus, I have this cool black swirly cloud where my arm used to be.

OOKaizer: :drool: :drool: :drool:

Sarah: :mad: Don't stare!

OOKaizer: Oh, sorry. I was just checking on you two. You seemed a bit off.

Sarah: Well, I seem to have an unnatural attraction to cheerleaders. I think it's because they make good hunting without actually being a threat.

Elina: I was confused because it was obviously the original me in that post, but I was being called by my double's name.

OOKaizer: And when, exactly, were you going to tell me you had a boyfriend?

Sarah: Oh, I'm just acting like I like him to get him to buy me stuff.

Elina: I thought you were interested in Tirmek. It's even stated that Lilly was to become my boyfriend in the future. Elin's character description hints at it too.

Sarah: Oh, he's more of a rival. That, and he's not the type to be manipulated by my feminine wiles.

OOKaizer: You're nine! You don't have feminine wiles!

Sarah: But I'm just so darn cute! *innocently bats her eyes*

Elina: I'm cute too! *big cow eyes*

OOKaizer: :mad: I blame you for this.

Rose: :weep:
rwarner3701

09-15-06, 01:04 PM		The entire raiding party meets back up at the docks as Darian comes running up.

Darian: I found all the treasure and Jarlot too.

Jarlot Senior: What?

Darian: Your son was here locked up in the jail.

Jarlot Senior: Well lets go get this loot and get back to the boat.

Darian: Great, does everyone have bags of holding?

The crew follows Darian into the tunnels. When they round the corner in the hallway Squishy rushes to the door at the end and runs his hands over it.

Squishy: Oh beautiful, the treasures you must hold...

Darian is standing by the door to the Janitorial Logistics room pointing the way.

Darian: Umm... Squishy its this way.

Squishy: What is back here?

Darian: You probably don't want to know.

The crew eneters and finds Jarlot stading at the top of a pile of treasure.

Jarlot: I am lord of all I survey bow before me and my limitless wealth.

Squishy: Oh great he is at the booze again.

Darian: Again? I don't think he ever stopped.

Jarlot Senior: Get down son, you are making a fool of yourself.

Jarlot: Awwww why did you have to bring my dad?

Darian: I was told to and we needed a captian.

Jarlot climbs down from his mound of treasure looking extremely disappointed as the crew begins to shovel loot into their bags. As they work a redshirt bursts in the door pierced by some arrows and bleeding.

Redshirt: We are under attack. Sara sent me to warn you but they got me.

Darian: I just remembered what we forgot... a cleric.

Redshirt: WHAT?! I ran all that way for... *gurgle*

The redshirt collapses on the floor as Terrek gathers the crew into an area around him.

Terrek: Mass teleport all aboad... I had better get a significantly larger cut for that.

OOrwarner: It was funny. Isn't that its own reward?

Terrek: ...no.

Just as a few soldiers burst the the door the crew disappears taking with them a large majority of the treasure from the vault.

OOC: They are back on the ship and on the way back to The Forgotten Freedom with loot and Jarlot. If Terrek and Ash need to talk now would be a good time before they get back. Sara will be apprenticing under Terrek once they return unless anything unexpected happens before they get back.
Crystalforged

09-15-06, 02:12 PM		OOCrystalforged: (appearing from nowhere holding a remote control) Hello there boys.

Cartman: Who are you?

Kanatash: What are you doing here?

OOCrystalforged: Unfortunately this plotline has failed to meet its hilarity quotient. We're going to have to shut it down now. To that end I'm going to be fast forwarding through the rest of the plot.

Cartman: Weeeeeaaaaaaaaaak-

OOCrystalforged: (presses the mute button) That's better.

Kanatash: How is that possible?

OOCrystalforged: (holding up remote) This is essentially an anthropomorhized creation of my entity power. Now get ready to tie up some loose ends. (presses fast forward button)

~~~~~~

Cartman is standing in front of a massive cylindrical device with a massive drill on the front. The rest of the crew is gathered around.

Cartman: This is the Hippie Tunneler 4000, we're going to use it to drill through the dense crowd of hippies to reach the epicenter of the crowd. There we will find the stage where they play their crappy hippie music and upload this slayer cd. Hippies hate death metal and will be driven from the ship. I'm going to need a crew to help with this. I'll need an artificer, a spellcaster, and a bard to sacrafice himself if things go wrong.

The crowd quickly parts at the last line leaving Rose standing alone.

Rose: Ok, screw you guys.

~~~~~

Somewhere in the middle of the hippie swarm, the Hippie Tunneler is broken down. Rose is climbing allong the outside towards an emergency reactivation switch on the outside, cursing all the way. He manages to grab the switch just before being dragged into the crowd by Kanatash's dad.

~~~~~

Cartman runs along the stage, beating off hippies with a baseball bat before reaching the center and plugging in a cd player. The hippies put their hands over their ears and begin fleeing the stage.

~~~~~

Chalky tries to jump Cartman from behind but suddenly there is a ripping sound and flames shoot out of Cartman's ass, engulfing Chalky.

Chalky: (on fire) IT BURNS!

~~~~~

Cartman is standing before a portal back to South Park.

Cartman: Screw you guys, I'm going home.

He dissipears through the portal which remains open for a moment afterwards. In that moment another boy in an orange parka sticks his head through. Unfortunately the portal closes just as he does so, shearing his head clean off. Several rats crawl out of the walls and begin chewing on the head before dragging it off.

~~~~~

Kanatash: So is that it?

OOCrystalforged: Should be. Hippies are gone. Cartman's gone. Things should be on track again.

Kanatash: Wait, my parents were in that crowd. What happened to them?

OOCrystalforged: ...good question.
rampant

09-15-06, 03:18 PM		Chalky - Cartman got away, someone let rose down (just when he was finished marinating too), I'm gonna eat someone today!

Kanatash's dad - This would be so much cooler if I weren't clean.

Chalky - Like I'm gonna eat a hippy that hasn'y been detoxed.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-15-06, 03:29 PM		Terrek "now... Raven. I beleve that I... solicited an answer."

Ash "I recall such Sir, but my answer will be iether true or short, but not both. Only fools and children do anything for but one reason. I am neither fool nor child.

Let me begin with the noblest, and comence it with a story. I don't know fully why I tell you, but you are perhaps the only one who is no more risk knowing this than not, and part of me wishes to tell the tale.

Once there was a Kenku sharp as a dagger, crewl as hunger, bright as coal. His name was Ra-tok, meaning Carrion in our parliance, a fine and honorable name. He came into his prime in the later stages of the war, and unlike many of his kind he playd a hand in it, killing in the shadows men it might have taken armies to reach, and he told him self each death save a thousand others. But for all his shill in shadow play he craved more. It is the traveler's humor to destroy us by granting our desires.

In the corse of his activitys he met a wouman, a Klashitar called Sanissorianis. She was powerfull, a psion, and she promised to teach Ra-tok the ways of the mind. She asked no payment, no compensation simply wishing to guide him. Ra-tok was a keen student, listened well, drinking in her lessons till her words echoed in his spirit. Her mastrey of him was like a sea fog that quietly quenched the candle flame of his own volition.

It began that 'to further his leassons' tasks became set, always veiled with sweet education. To replace the contenst of a messengers satchel, to kill a look out with a blade she game him to discard. Soon he was her assasin, and the deaths he caused he soon ealised were proloning a war that no nation could aford. By then of corse he was her creature, and blood was thick on his tallons, the blood of is victims and of the many who died as he did is part in prolonging the war.

He saught fredom, but she was in his mind, in his soul, in the very power he might have used to win his freedom. Oh so gently she had bound hi, but firmly too. He was not confounded...

There are names we all are taught but never speak, and moast feared is the proper name of the Deamon who Styles him self lord of the skys of Shavarath, master of all flying feinds. Ra-tok knew this, and he spoke that name any way. What they disgussed I do not know, but Ra-tok got what he desired and more. He had been freed of her controll, but also from all other bindings. From society, from consience, everything. and at the core was the lust for flame. Imagene yuor own hunger for souls changed to the lust for conflageation, and for it to come upon you suddenly, in high summer in a city backed by the sun to be dry as timber...

A city of ten thousand, men, woumen, children reduced to ashes. Firefighters buchered in there sleep, those who fled imoliated on the roads, sone turning to clinker in his madness. Only ash remained, and for what, but the lies of a teacher. Sara is young, and ful of talent. I do not wish her Ra-toks's regret. That is one reason.

That this offer seems out of charicter for you is another. Ive watched many a long yer before yor coming and since. Never have I seen, nor heared you give a gift without a kook hidden in it, so I am inclined to suspicion.

And lastly I am lonly, to long hiding from Sanissorianis's agents who still claim me as there own, and from the deamons cults, foe he who cursed the Kenku to walk for ever more cannot tolerate that one he cursed noe scorns the earth. Among the crew I count some as my roost, I will defend them as I should have long ago, as best I can.

Lastly as I have remarked I have many foes and though they have not found me yet they will. So, eater of souls, what is your intrest in the child?"

(Cypher its over to you. Ash is taking a risk telling all this to Terrek, that he will know.)
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-15-06, 04:00 PM		13 hefts a bundle of letters through the door to Caralot's labs. As the progenitor dragon finally tuggs the bag through it falls on em.

13 (muffled): RSVP call.

Caralot: Goodie! I knew they'd all come.

13: Does Kanatash know you know this many freaky creatures? (the pile of letters collapses on em, muffling e's voice)

Caralot: I don't think so.

Caralot picks up the top letter, parchment sealed with wax pressed into the shape of the Silver Flame symbol.

Caralot: :confused: I'm fairly certain Jaela's (opening letter) the only one from—:eek: …………… :headexplo KANATASH!

Kanatash: *poof* Huh? What? How'd I get here so fast?

Silver (whispering): It's a special wife trick known as "Husband's in so much trouble he'd better get his butt here now!"

Caralot: What is this? *thrusts the letter at him; Wife Glare (more powerful than Ninja Glare, but only to her husband)*

Silver: :devil: Learned it from her mother.

Kanatash: Hmm, this is from Krozen. Well, yes, I did invite him—

Caralot: No.

Kanatash: I think you're being a bit unreason—*urk!*

Caralot now has him by the front of his incorporeal shirt.

Caralot: :mad: The answer is no.

Kanatash: :eek: CanIatleasthaveanexplaination?

Caralot (ice calm): Weylin will kill Krozen. And Weylin is willing to kill anyone who gets in his way.

Kanatash: There are quite a lot of people on this ship who could stop him. He's not that powerful.

Caralot: I don't think you get it: Krozen comes here, either he or Weylin dies. Krozen [i]doesn't come here, they both live.

Kanatash: How are you so sure?

Caralot holds her glare for a few more moments, then sighs and releases Kanatash. She sits down at her designing desk.

Caralot: I had Mawerrkan and Okarran go over Weylin while I was away in my world. They both have the skill to read genetics by magic, and I've gone over Weylin myself, and we all agree that either there's some especially powerful aspect to Weylin's ancestry, or Krozen did something to him. Not just psychological, but magically. Weylin may not have enough power to get past a lot of the crew on this ship, but he has enough to make sure the only way to stop him is to kill him.
cypher_zero

09-15-06, 04:04 PM		Terrek: … Intriguing. Your past echoes my own in no small amount. Your honesty as well commands some respect; something that is not easily given by one such as myself. As per the girl… My reasons for taking an interest in her are perhaps less selfish than they may seem. I have on daughter, but I did not raise her. I lost my son many years ago… I do not believe I’ve mentioned him before now. Sara is much like he was in many aspects. Perhaps the gods seek to torture me with this reflection of him in her. Regardless, I do not wish to see even a distant echo of him fall to the same fate – overwhelmed by the power they possess… so much so that it engulfs them entirely. Sara has not yet discovered all she can do, but when she does, without guidance, it will destroy her. She will be as a daughter to me; and I do not wrong my kin. Are you still so untrusting of me, or need I explain further?

OOC: Thanks for working on the spelling. I still noticed a few mistakes, but it’s likely they’re things spell-check wouldn’t catch. Again, thanks.
.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-15-06, 05:03 PM		Silver: Anybody got a fix on when Marish is due?

Bunny: That's your department.

Caralot: Here to help!………………(looks through records)……………………I'd say she's still got 4-7 months, depending on whether her humanoid or cat side takes over.

Bunny: Silver, why didn't you know that?

Silver: Hey, do you know how hard it is to get Weylin to know that Sakura is in to him? It's not going well!
Charles Phipps

09-15-06, 06:08 PM		OOC: That just shows you've got great geek cred Urial.

And the Disclaimer I LOLed at tremendously.

I also loved Rampant's rebuttal with the "Found you!"

Kaiser's entire conversation though had been rolling on the ground, especially the Hellsing comments. I'm quite fond of the Elin and Sarah manipulation too. They're such little minxes.

Kaiser: NINE!

Darian's adventures I want to also comment have been terribly amusing and go Hippie Tunneler!

IC:

Rose: In any case, that concludes lesson fifteen on Illithids.

Illthids: CTHULHU! WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN US!?

:coolcthul: Well because you're all crazy incestous gerbil loving freaks!

Rose: Any questions?

Elina: Was it necessary to send a bunch of Japanese stir fry cooks after them?

Rose: Yes.

Sarah: I love these lessons!

Rose: Yes, the World of Darkness is filled with many strange and wonderful things.

Lisa: ROSE! What the hell have you been doing?

Rose's Hand: Teaching your children how to kill the horrors of the night! Mostly it involves lots of Mountain Dew, Dorritoes, and playing the entire Castlevania series inbetween Muffy the Vampire Layer marathons.

Sarah: Can we stop with the porn already? You've washed out images of our parents.

Lisa: ROSE!

Rose: Now Now, that was them breaking into my SPECIAL collection of DVDs. I only showed them quality entertainment.

Sarah: Like Nightmare on Elm Street, Halloween, Friday the Thirteenth, and Fright Night.

Lisa: Oh God, you'll have nightmares for weeks.

Rose: Sex with you and Terra gave them those. Frickin Hentai.

Lisa: IT IS NOT HENTAI! Despite the tenatcles.

Elina: I don't think whips actually kill everything Rose.

Rose: Quiet and just learn your proper combos.

Sarah: Can we break for some more Darkstalkers. I call Morrigan.

Elina: You ALWAYS call Morrigan.

Sarah: She just reminds me of Aunty Sabriel.

Lisa: A succubus is NOT your aunt!

Lilly: It's very humiliating to constantly get beaten by a girl?

Lisa, Elina, Sarah: Why?

Lilly: Uhh...no reason.

Rose: In any case, here's another crew member that's here to tell you about the undead. Ashes.

Ashes: Hey baby.

Lisa: :drool:

Elina: MOM!

Lisa: GAH! I don't know what happened!

Rose's Hand: That's just because Ashes is the living embodiment of machismo with his torn shirt, chainsaw hand, and zippy one liners.

Ashes: Come get some sugar.

Lisa: Must....resist...with...paladin's....wil l.

Ashes: Okay listen here you gawd damned primitive screwheads.

Elina: I beg your pardon!

Ashes: Quiet Hermione!

Sarah: Lol! OWNED.

Elina: Stop using hacker slang in real life.

Sarah: Zomph. :-p

Ashes: See this? This is my boomstick! It's a 12-gauge double-barreled Remington. S-Mart's top of the line. You can find this in the sporting goods department. That's right, this sweet baby was made in Grand Rapids, Michigan; retails for about one hundred nine, ninety-five. It's got a walnut stock, cobalt blue steel, and a hair trigger. That's right, shop smart, shop World of Darkness-Mart!

Sarah: Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

Elina: It's a shotgun.

Rose: Shhhhh! I'm the leader here.

Ashes: I got news for you, pal. You ain't leading but two things right now: Jack and Sh**. And, Jack left town.

Elina: Does he say anything but quotes from the movie?

Rose: Yes, but not very often.

Ashes: The trick is to always prepare for your love interest to become a monster. Take Shelia over here.

Shelia: You found me beautiful once.

Ashes: Honey, you got real ugly.

*KABLOOM*

Elina: Gah!

Sarah: LOOK AT THE WAY THE HEAD BLEW UP!

Lisa: Hmmm.

Sarah: Aren't you going to rip us away screaming?

Lisa: Why? This is pretty much the same paladin's training I went through at your age.

Sarah and Elina: :stare:

Ashes: Groovy.

Rose: In any case, Ashes and I are going to take you on a real live hunt for the EVIL UNDEAD in this world.

Ashes: We're hunting Vampiros Stripperina! Aka the 'Sexy Bi-Vampire' type of undead.

Gore Rayne: *in thick German accent* I don't speak English but I hate Nazis and fill out a bikini top well. When I'm wearing one.

Lisa: Grrr....Must KILL...UNDEAD. CHARGE!

Ashes: She's just jealous Gore had a Playboy shoot.

Rose: And special thanks to our sponsors in the Hell Sing group.

Integrity Van HellSing: I'm still not sleeping with you.

Rose: Pppft, big loss. I didn't know you were a girl until episode 3.

*Integrity kicks Rose in the balls*
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-15-06, 06:40 PM		Ash "I would be intreaged to hear your history Eater of souls, but another time. something calls my attention" ash bows, teleports away.

He apears Near captain rose, sees Ashes.

Ash *In higlander Voice" "There can be only one!"

Ashes "what the-!?" bursts into flames.

Ash "Ashes to ashes, dust to dust"

Rule 241 addendum: Ash nolonger permited to make any kind of popcultural reference under any circomstances.
242: Just becase the rule list is on fire does not invaladate it.
243: Just becase the rule wrighter is on fire does not invaladate the list.
rampant

09-15-06, 06:42 PM		244. Somebody put out the list its hard to sleep with it smoldering over there.

245. Thanks Earl.
urial angel of death

09-15-06, 06:55 PM		Volrath appears behind Caralot

Volrath: Oh come on auntie. Please let Krozen come to the wedding.

Caralot: Stop calling me auntie and no!

Volrath: Please I'm sure I could teach Weylin the fun of torturing Krozen insted of killing him.
Charles Phipps

09-15-06, 06:58 PM		OOC: Oh ppfft. Like ANYTHING can kill Ashes. ;-)

It's like Satnak killing Chuck Norris Jarlot. Its so ridiculous that its automatically non-canon.

http://www.penny-arcade.com/images/2004/20040119h.gif

hehehehe
urial angel of death

09-15-06, 07:37 PM		Kefka stands on the deck. A look of wonder plays on his face. Terra walks up to him.

Terra: What are you so happy about?

Kefka: This ship has done everything I ever tried to achieve.

Terra: What do mean?

Kefka waves his had around the ship. He gestures to the blasted crater that remains of the Demon Wastes, the pile of rubble that was once Sharn, the Moronland that has doubled in size, Karranath which has fallen into arachy after several attempts were made on its leader's life, to the Thanish countryside crawling with hideous aberrations, and finally the twisting chaos that is left of the Plane of Shadow.

Kefka: Since you killed me I haven't felt so wonderful and full of life.

Terra: Come to think of it my alternate did kill you. How are you still here?

Kefka: I am a nightmare the primal evil in every person, and that evil will never go away.
Charles Phipps

09-15-06, 07:54 PM		*Sephiroth Kefka in the back of the chest*

Sephiroth: No...*I* am a nightmare. The primal evil in every person.

Sorceress: NO...I...

Yuna: All we need is LOVE!

*"I've got You Babe" starts to play*

Tidus: Babe....

Sephiroth: Oh God.
urial angel of death

09-15-06, 08:00 PM		OOC: No Sephiroth will never be a memory.
rampant

09-15-06, 08:11 PM		Satnak - :shifty:....Ok I didn't technically kill him. I trapped him in a demi-plane and collapsed it annihaliting all within....What I'm a Breaker Not a Berzerker. Illis could have killed him.
Charles Phipps

09-15-06, 08:18 PM		OOC:

Chuck Norris Jarlot...with infinite levels.

Jarlot: GAH!
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-15-06, 08:19 PM		Ash "Who cares about dead? hes still on fire." :evillaugh

Ashes "why wont you let me die?" :weep:

(OOC: Can I make a request for Rose to DM Exalted next seeing as there on white wolf products? Ah, memorys. Starting out more powerfull than an epic charicter cross bread with Chuck noris becase Solars are just that awesome AND making the saintlyest paladin look like she sells narcotics to kids at the same time. Good times )
rampant

09-15-06, 08:23 PM		OORampant - because it amuses us:D

Ashes - rhetorical questions

OORampant - those are the most fun to answer:D
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-15-06, 09:34 PM		Lisa: Oh God, you'll have nightmares for weeks.
13: As to opposed to simply living on the Forgotten Freedom?
*********
Caralot: No, Volrath, Krozen is not coming to my wedding.

Volrath: Well, I heard that Cuddles heard that Marish heard that Saberiel heard that JJ heard that you're related to Krozen through your daughter and House Vidalis. So he's technically like family.

Caralot: I am related to another Krozen.

Volrath: Hey, it's Kanatash's wedding. Isn't part of marriage that you have to compro—*GAK!*

Caralot suddenly has Volrath in a one-handed neck grip.

Caralot (getting her face right up close to Volrath's): Listen carefully. I've heard Weylin talk about Krozen. I've heard him speak about how Krozen locked him up in a silver collar and…………

Caralot stops, as if she now only realizes she's said too much. She drops Volrath.

Volrath scurries out of the room under Caralot's Ninja Glare. Scuttling along the corridors he runs into Puck.

Volrath: Hey, you, you're Caralot's brother?

Puck: Yeah?

Volrath: I just got choked one-handed by your sister over my uncle's invitation of some guy who's not very nice.

Puck: Is this guy known for being a complete evil jerk?

Volrath: Um, yeah.

Puck: *nod (as much as a giant spider can nod)* She gets that from dad.

Volrath: Huh…………her dad?

Volrath imagines Bruce Jarlot dancing on a table while singing baudy pirate songs and drinking beer by tossing it up into the air and hoping some lands in his mouth.

Puck: He was a big-shot crimefighter in Sharn at one point. Still stuck to it even after going pirate. He can get quite intense.

Volrath: :blink: ……………………Your family has some serious issues.
********
Caralot puts her head down on her desk. Quench leaps up and licks her face, but whines when he doesn't get any attention.

Caralot: I wish I could tell them. I wish I could tell them why I'm really afraid of Krozen and Weylin meeting…………
rampant

09-15-06, 09:40 PM		Satnak - Then tell me.

Caralot - How the!?

Satnak - Main advantage of incarnum, adaptability. Seriously though, I'm a breaker forbidden lore, and die-before-revealing type secrets are part of our game. Do you think my transmogrification of late is in any way legal back home? I exploited a loop-hole by doing it here. You want to keep a secret fine, but one of the fighting ubers needs to know so when the **** hits the fan, they can do something. I can keep your secret just as I keep the forbidden lore. Use without revalation.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-15-06, 11:20 PM		OOC: Ok, just a warning. The following is ENTIRELY out of character for the crew aboard the FFII. It is not meant to imply canon use in any way, shape or form. The only purpose of the following is to amuse me. :devil: Sorry about the length. Had to do it all at once for it to be funny.

IC:

At the helm, Sara is talking through a speaking tube.

Sara: All right, all right! *closes it* Friggin' zealot.

Admiral Jarlot: *bursts in* Sara! Seal the halls! Sound the alarm! MOVE, WOMAN! MOVE!

Sara: Hang on, someone stole Darian's Holy Book of the Entities.

Admiral Jarlot: Screw it. We've got bigger problems than eternal damnation. Man, I never thought I'd say that... But the Murph-mobile is missing!

Terrek: *walks in* Well, maybe it's with my book, 10k Way's to be Ominous.

Admiral Jarlot: What the hell does that have to do with anything?!

Terrek: It's missing from my room.

Admiral Jarlot: Well, get in line! I've got no Murph-mobile to drive around in while I wait for oblivion!

Ash, Elin, and Bolt Tooth Tony walk in.

B.T. Tony: Tha' crossbow was brand new!

Elin: Shut up about the stupid crossbow! Admiral, you've got to do something!

Admiral Jarlot: What in Khyber's snack bin is going on here?

Ash: There's a dirty, stinkin' thief on board!

B.T. Tony: They stole my crossbow!

Ash: And my scrapbook of firey death!

Elin: And my song books!

Terrek: Seems we're all missing something...

Admiral Jarlot: That's the whole point, we don't know who's throat to slit!

Terrek: Excuse me?

Admiral Jarlot: What do you mean "what?" Someone's throat needs slitting, and we don't know where to lay the blade!

Terrek: I'm sure there's a rational explaination for the things that are missing.

Admiral Jarlot: Yeah. You took 'em!

Terrek: What? My book was stolen.

B.T. Tony: Well, it's pretty obvious that you took your own book, to cover up the fact that you did it.

Terrek: Ok, I get it. So the Abberation did it, huh? Automatically blaming the Abberation. Nice.

B.T. Tony: Well, a minute ago you were ready to blame the Kenku!

Terrek: No I wasn't!

Ash: You wanna play the race card, Terrek? Is that it? So Kenku steal? We're just a bunch of thieves?!

Terrek: I never said that!

Admiral Jarlot: You don't have to say it...*sniff sniff* I can smell it on you...

Sara: You disgusting bigot.

Admiral Jarlot: Enough! Until we find the thief, I am declaring Martian Law!

Sara: Uh, I think you mean Martial Law.

Admiral Jarlot: Silence! I'm forming a cadre of Martian Knights, charged with enforcing Martian Law.

Elin: Martian Knights?

Admiral Jarlot: *holding a bat* Now who's ready to beat some ass?

Ash: *steps forward and kneels* I'm in.

Admiral Jarlot: Then I dub thee...Sir Phobos! Knight of Mars. Beater of Ass. *hands him a bat* Be a hitter, babe.

Ash walks over to B.T. Tony.

B.T. Tony: 'ey. I wanna be a Martian Knight. ...like you guys... Maybe...get me one o' them...bats...

*CRACK IN THE NUTS*

Terrek & Elin: :eek: What are you doing?!

Admiral Jarlot: Silence! I am enforcing the law of the sacred Red Planet.

Sara: It's not Martian Law, it's-

Admiral Jarlot: Sir Phobos!

*Lots of whacking noises*

Sara: My hand! You cruched my hand!

B.T. Tony: *on the ground* There's somethin' real bad wrong...in my pants...

Admiral Jarlot: *to Sara* Prithee, nave. What can I do under Martian Law?

Sara: *in immense pain* Uh...anything? Anything you want?!

Admiral Jarlot: Can I marry people?

Sara: I don't know! Yeah! Sure!

Admiral Jarlot: *to Terrek and Elin* Then hence forth, you two are married! That way Ares will look more favorably...on your couplings.

Elin: WHAT?!?!

Admiral Jarlot: Nooooooowwwwww...couple!

Terrek: :mad: Pardon me?!

Admiral Jarlot: You heard me. Put the spurs to her, bud.

Terrek: Admiral, you are no longer fit to command. I am relieving you.

Admiral Jarlot: Mmmm-hm. Sir Phobos?

*Ash brains Elin*

Terrek: :eek: You animal! What have you done?!

Ash: Oh, crap. I think I killed her?

Admiral Jarlot: Man, that's rough. Newlyweds and all. How you holding up?

B.T. Tony: *getting up* I hurt...really bad. Where I pee...

Admiral Jarlot: Walk it off, Sir Demos!

Terrek: Who the hell is Sir Demos?!

B.T. Tony: You'd take a eunich like me?

Admiral Jarlot: No predjudice on Mars, son. Now, Sir Demos...I'm sending you...on a quest. Which is to find...uh...Terrek's ass. And then beat it.

Terrek: We're supposed to be looking for a thief!

WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK!

Terrek: *on the ground* MY EYE! WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY EYE?!

Admiral Jarlot: Now bring the prisoner down to the dungeon for his slitting.

Ash: Uh...we don't really have a dungeon, sir.

Admiral Jarlot: Damn. How about the galley? It'll be good since there's gonna be lots and lots of Terrek guts slopping all over the place.

*more beating*

Terrek: MY OTHER EYE! WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY OTHER EYE?!

When they reach the galley, Terrek in tow, the doors open to reveal the rest of the crew (mostly Redshirts) surrounding a birthday cake and throwing confetti.

Admiral Jarlot: :D Ah hah ha! You should see the look on your face!

B.T. Tony: You swear he didn't know? Oh, man! Crushed gonads was totally worth it!

Elin: :D And so was my fractured skull! Oh, Terrek, it's priceless.

Sara: :D Crushed hands, get it?!

Terrek: You did all this...for a surprise party?! *quietly* What a bunch of :censored: ing ***holes.

Devon pops out of the cake and begins singing a rap birthday song. Ears begin bleeding immediately.

Terrek: Seriously. What a bunch of :censored: ing ***holes. It's not even my birthday...
urial angel of death

09-15-06, 11:29 PM		If we keep makeing see lab refrences Silence could become the depressing concillor and to help them get over Marco's death (who best represent's marco on the FF2?)
urial angel of death

09-15-06, 11:30 PM		OOC: Just to point out Kaizer no one in that seemed out of character at all exept maybe Sara and Elin being in on the prank.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-15-06, 11:33 PM		Terrek is far more powerful, and I ignored that. That was simply because I needed to in order for it to be funny. That, and Ash doesn't strike me as the Marco type. Those were the main things. Admiral Jarlot was obviously in character, since he is Captain Murphy. Other than that, I only took some minor liberties. I couldn't help myself, since it was an almost perfect setup. :D
cypher_zero

09-15-06, 11:50 PM		Holy Sh*t! I think that's the most I've laughed at a post in a while! HILARIOUS! Oh and "10k Way's to be Ominous" I'm siging that.

cypher
Charles Phipps

09-16-06, 12:00 AM		OOC: Just to point out Kaizer no one in that seemed out of character at all exept maybe Sara and Elin being in on the prank.

Yes, and frankly Rose is Sparks. We've also always used Doog as the angry black man onboard too. Too dumb to be Quin sadly....must be being a filthy half orc.

;-)

I declare it canon.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-16-06, 12:08 AM		OOC: :D I did that whole thing on a whim. I never expected it to be so well received. Thank you all. :bow:

As far as Terrek = Quinn, I just couldn't stop laughing when I pictured that. Rose would have been Sparks, but he wasn't there. I thought Sara worked quite well in his place. She's essentially his apprentice, anyway. ;)
rampant

09-16-06, 01:24 AM		Serene - They stop at eight....oh.

Ketty - ...Maybe...this wasn't a good Idea.
rwarner3701

09-16-06, 01:36 AM		OOC: :rofl::rofl::rofl: That was awesome. Ash is a kenku not a changling. How about quasi-canon?

As the FFII makes its way back to the Forgotten Freedom the majority of the crew is asleep tired from a long day of travel and looting. Suddenly each of them wakes up from a dream due to pain and/or confusion. In unison they all say...

"That without a doubt was the strangest dream I have ever had. I can't wait for morning to tell everyone about it."

They each then drift off back to sleep. In the morning Sara finds Elin in the mess hall getting breakfast

Sara: I had the wierdest dream last night.

Elin: Really? Me too.

Sara: What was yours about?

Elin: I'm not sure all I can remeber is fragments.

Sara: Now that I try to remeber I can't either.

Elin: Oh well, must have been something we ate last night.

Sara: No more midnight ice cream binges.

Elin: Agreed.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-16-06, 01:48 AM		Ash is a kenku not a changling. OOC: :confused: Really? *checks Ash's character description way back on page 1* Crap. My bad. I'll fix that...

While I'm talking about the beginning of the thread, what ever happened to LugWrench? RPGfan seems to have disappeared as well.

And the question I'm sure all the veterans are asking: Where the heck is Chrys? Poor Volrath is being denied his sweet lovin' P/Y/R style! :weep: ;)
Gladius_Lucix

09-16-06, 02:01 AM		OOC: The cookies for caught references rule is now in effect. PM me with guesses. One :cookie: per reference. See how many you can get!

----

A hulking monstrosity of an invention stands in Liam's laboratory, and it's not even done yet. Crystals and Dragonshards of all kinds stud the surface and interior of the machine, seemingly at random. Deep within the machine, a golden sphere floats, serving no apparent purpose. Various gears, cogs, and pulleys whirl, though they all lead back to a seven spoked wooden wagon wheel. What seems to be an inactive head of a warforged made from pure gold is attached by a bundle of wires at about even in height with Liam's head. Next to the head is a wooden panel that seems out of place among the gems and gears.

Once the eye gives up on comprehending Liam's newest project, it moves on to the parts scattering the floor. Widgets, doodads, whatchamacallits, thingamajigs, whatsits and whosits, and other gadgetry components of every description make it almost impossible to traverse the room without stepping on some. Curiously, among all the obviously technological equipment, there rests a small, black pyramid, inscribed with the Riedran word for "Chief."

Liam is furiously working on the contraption. Whenever he gets done with the piece he was on, he tiptoes delicately through the field of technological rubble, selects a piece, and returns to the invention just as delicately.

----
Outside his room, the Duct Tape Swarm has applied a few strips across the door to prevent entrance.

Duct Tape Strips: *sigh* I hope he's done soon. I'm tired of sitting up here.
Charles Phipps

09-16-06, 02:09 AM		OOC: And oh yes, I'm going to do the Exalted.

;-)
Kaizer_Ryu

09-16-06, 02:46 AM		Lisa stands over the freshly smited corpse of Gore Rayne.

Terra: Not bad.

Lisa: Oh, hi hon.

Sarah: Mom! Uncle Rose is showing us all about fighting the Undead.

*CRACK BOOM*

Terra: :rolleyes: At least he's doing something useful.

Rose: :mad:

Elina: :D We got to see Alucard!

Terra: Which one?

Elina: All of them!

Lisa: Of all the things we showed them, Undead-

*CRACK BOOM*

-is one we overlooked.

Terra: Dante was most eager to show them how to deal with Demons, Devils, and other spawn of the Abyss. Aya did quite well against Abberations. Most of the places we went had monsters in some form. Yeah, I guess we missed Undead.

*CRACK BOOM*

Terra: Does it have to do that?

Rose: Yes.

Ashes: *clears his throat* I've been posing here for about two minutes now. You can start fawning over me at any time.

Terra: Sorry. I don't go for guys. Never have, never will.

Ashes: :raincloud

(OOC: It's so much fun to crush egos. :D )

Terra: I was just checking in. You seem to have things under control, though. I'll see you when you get back.

Sarah: Where are you going?

Terra: I have to make a house call.

Rose: Ship call.

Terra: :rolleyes: Whatever.

-----

Slaypaw lies in her new spot next to Norbaz's stove. Another cat walks up, purring softly.

Slaypaw: Mrow. (Hi, Terra.)

Terra: Prrrrrr. (How are you today?)

Slaypaw: Mew. (As well as can be expected. They're quite lively.)

Terra: Meow. (That's good. I only had one, but I know roughly what it's like. Elina was a kicker. Where's Fluffy?)

Slaypaw: Row. (He's hunting at the moment. He's been taking good care of me.)

Terra: Prrow. ( ;) He better. Just so you know, the culmination may be uncomfortable for you, since they're part Dragon. If there's anything you need, I'll be by again later.)

Slaypaw: Mewl. (Thanks.) Zzzzzzzzz.....

OOC: I always envied cats on their ability to fall asleep ANYwhere at ANY time in ANY position. And almost instantly, too. But I can have my revenge with the wonderful invention known as the lazer pointer. :evillaugh
rampant

09-16-06, 03:11 AM		OOC: Damned right he better, or I'll take away his use people as target practice privileges.
--------------------------------------

Fluffy - Merow meow (its kinda of small but it tastes good)

Fluffy drags in a dog sized shark, with noticeable shock burns.

Slaypaw - :drool:
-------------------------------
Satnak and Igor review concept sketches.

Satnak - Its lovely, ...

Igor - buth?

Satnak - Its a tad too costumish? is that a word?

Igor - Hmmmm (takes out another sketch) howth abouth thith one?

Satnak - Yes I like this knotwork, on the back and hair. It keeps the family colors prominent whithout making me look like i'm attending someone's funeral.
------------------------------
OOC: Yes I realize its a time stretch but DEAL WITH IT!
---------------------------------------

Serene - Are you Staying for the wedding?

Ketty - I'll be here for the event, and we'll be popping in more often till then. Just a warning the others are here aswell.
----------------------------

Rixle - Hammer senses tingling.

Forbes - Where did e go?
---------------------------

AWOOOOOOOOOOGA AWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGA

Liam - (looks up from his project) Ok i did not build an alert setting that loud on the Wiersan scanner.
Charles Phipps

09-16-06, 03:56 AM		OOC: A penny arcades that describe Rose and Zella.

http://www.penny-arcade.com/images/2006/20060222.jpg

IC:

Rose: Your education of your daughters was very thorough but sadly, you didn't just miss undead...

*CRACK BOOM*

Rose: But also Epic Levels.

Sarah: Aren't those a myth created by Munchkins? Like the 20th level Half-Elf Druid whom lives at the North Pole and has an entire kingdom of enslaved elves?

Rose: Santa Clause is real too honey. He just rarely leaves anymore due to the fact that his gluttony has gotten the better of him. Instead, he just has females and food brought to him when not using his elemental servants to distribute toys.

Lisa: What the Hell are you teaching these kids?

Rose: Life lessons learned on the streets.

Lisa: You grew up in the Eldeen Reaches.

Rose: In any case, I'm going to teach them about Epic Levels by taking them to Creation. It's the preteniously named world that is where everyone's level is immediately multiplied by a factor of ten.

Lisa: :shock:

Rose: In any case, let's check it out. I've arranged a special instructor to talk about epic levels.

*they all enter*

*They come across a verdant forrest where two figures stand bare chested in fighting pants*

*The two fighters looking remarkably like Vegeta and Goku respectively*

Song Sings of Seven Divine Wind Dragon Bunnies of Flame: At last, after thirty years of training since you murdered my father when I was two years old and tracking you across the Forests of Ten Thousand Creeping Lotus Blossoms through the Lake of Jutting Ice Death from the Sky. At last I will avenge my father and proceed to claim the rank of Ultimate Champion of the Living Legend Fighting Style!

Captain Jarlot: Your Kang-Fu is very strong I see. But what you lack is what a warrior needs most.

Song Sings of Seven Divine Wind Dragon Bunnies of Flame: Twenty dice for a single combat roll and a calculator necessary to figure it all out?

Captain Jarlot: No.

Song Sings of Seven Divine Wind Dragon Bunnies of Flame: A daiklaive so large that it doesn't fit on my back and is probably twice as long as my body while being so badass that no one asks if I'm compensating for anything?

Captain Jarlot: No.

Song Sings of Seven Divine Wind Dragon Bunnies of Flame: Then what?

Captain Jarlot: The Ultimate Death Attack!

Song Sings of Seven Divine Wind Dragon Bunnies of Flame: NOOOOOOOOOOOO! You know this! You will not be able to use it on me!

Captain Jarlot: I already have! For I have THE BLINK OF DEATH! You are already dead. I killed you minutes ago!

*Song Sings of Seven Divine Wind Dragon Bunnies of Flame's body rumbles and then he detonates*

*Cherry blossoms fall around Captain Jarlot and his defeated foe*

Elina: What...the...

Sarah: Frack?

Lisa: Language!

Terra: Yeah, what the frack was that? That was the most fracked up fracking thing I've ever fracking seen in my life and I've seen a lot of fracked up feldarcarb.

Rose: Visited the Battlestar Galactica universe I see.

Terra: Our marriage was tested by Starbuck.

Captain Jarlot: Hey kids, just handling some last minute business before I start teaching you about Epic Levels.

*Lilly walks out, looking remarkably like Gohan*

Lilly: I've been studying for a year here myself!

Elina: Squee!

Sarah: What was that noise?

Elina: I don't know.

Captain Jarlot: In any case, the first thing to note is...

Rose: OH CRAP! NINJAS!

*200 Ninja Tyranasaurus Rexes leap out of the forest throwing shurikens as large as rowboats*

Captain Jarlot: CHARGE!

*Jarlot flies up and kicks them in the air as he utterly ignores gravity*

Rose: Now concentrate real hard kids.

*The two kids then find themselves in an outfit like Lina Inverse for Sarah and a Sailor Fuku for Elina*

Elina: The hell?

Rose: Work with it!

*Rose glows and suddenly a black an evil aura surrounds him as he becomes incredibly beautiful with demonic looking armor and swings his 6ft long katana as a wave of evil energy utterly obliterates 40 ninjas*

Deathless Rose: Now they will know the full pain of defying the Lord of Seven Shadows

*Elina and Sarah leap into the air and start killing ninjas left and right*

Terra: Rose, what the hell has happened to you? Are you just going to become another angsty bishounen. I swear, you haven't worn that stupid costume since we last played Warhammer. I find this whole Exalted thing very very...silly.

Deathless Rose: Terra, I've been polite but don't insult Exalted again...

Terra: It seems just a blatant munchkin fantasy....

*the entire sky blackens to utter night as light illuminates Rose's eyes as they burn like coals*

Deathless Rose: Don't say another *******ed word or I will kill you myself. If you say anything, a single word. I will kill you THEN myself. Then when our souls journey across the black abyss until they reach the fires of the Neverborn's domain. I shall give you a front row ticket to viewing me marshalling the fleshless and flayed souls of the damned in a revolt against the infernal lords of Malpheas. You will witness such carnage and hopelessness in my conquest of the dread dimension that your eyes will be torn out by your own action as you lose all sanity only to find that it holds no salvation from the pain.

Terra: Uhhh...Rose...

Deathless Rose: Then, I will strip the Heavens dry of their living souls and wield them together as I forge them into soul metal. I will marshall my engines of despair and terror funneled by the screams of the innocent as I tear a hole in time itself. There, I will take you strapped to my Doomsday Machine back to this very moment so that you can look upon your future.

Terra: uhhhh...

Deathless Rose: My the gaping maw of my form, I will spit out a thousand ravenous Hell-crows that will strip your body free of all flesh and then using my will to keep you alive...the two of you will witness a great NOTHING spread across all creation. From there, I shall devour all that is and your last visage before joining the ranks of Thanatos will be my radiance as the Lord of the Conquered Sun. There, as my willing and glorious slave, you will add your voice to the song that ends the world

Elina: HEY! MY MOON WAND ROCKS!

*light returns*

Deathless Rose: That's awesome honey!

Lisa: Let's get him from this planet fast.

Terra: Nah, he just reminds me of my first girlfriend from back in Xoriat. Brings back some pleasant memories.

Lisa: Uhhhhh....

OOC: Special thanks to Gabe http://www.penny-arcade.com/images/2006/20060410.jpg
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-16-06, 07:46 AM		Silver: Know what's missing here? Chicks with impossibly large and gravity-defying boobs.

OOcat: Gag me now. :yuck:

Silver: Yeah, yeah, I know what does it for you.

OOcat: Lina Inverse. :drool:

Silver: If I hadn't been the one to come up with it, this would just be pathetic.

Bunny: Always thought Exalted sounded boring. And the ability to kill with a blink is just lame.

13: Of course, when you get down to it, the more rules an RPG has the less you really can just enjoy it.

OOcat: This thread. Greatest RPG.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-16-06, 08:24 AM		Ash "In honnor of this ships arival in Creation where indeed no one frrom this ship seems at all overpowered I will now recite a poem." coughs and begins.
"Oh a Solars always happy,
Yes a solars never glum,
A Solars always cheerfull,
'Cos the sun shines out his-" sees the droping anvil doges, levating over the pittrap without effect, but completly fails to notise Lisa's hammer smashing him clean to the deck below. Small humans circle his head.
Ash "I was going to say Brow." :mad:
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-16-06, 08:49 AM		Satnak - Seriously though, I'm a breaker forbidden lore, and die-before-revealing type secrets are part of our game. Do you think my transmogrification of late is in any way legal back home? I exploited a loop-hole by doing it here. You want to keep a secret fine, but one of the fighting ubers needs to know so when the **** hits the fan, they can do something. I can keep your secret just as I keep the forbidden lore. Use without revalation.
Caralot: ………………………I'm not sure it's that simple.

Satnak: All right, who are you and what have you done with the sickeningly-cute, unphazable Caralot?

Caralot: I'm me. But I've been in this dimension so long that I'm starting to lose the mitigating effect of the hyper-insanity my world is made out of. I had a secondary objective for going home all those months: I hoped I could "recharge" my former personality. But I don't think it's working.

Satnak: Welcome to reality, sister.

Caralot: Yeah, 13 gave me a talk.

Satnak: But that still isn't going to help me stop this thing between Weylin and Krozen. I need details.

Caralot: I don't actually know what it is. That's why I wish I could tell you. I know that Krozen horribly abused Weylin physically and psychologically, but I think there might have also been magical abuse.

Satnak: Magical abuse? :confused:

Caralot: It would require concepts for which you have no words. A simple yet completely wrong way to describe it would be to slowly liquify a soul and then bind it back together using…………………there isn't even a way to describe that part. The ideals of the Purists of the Silver Flame?

Satnak: Krozen just gets sicker and sicker every time we bring him up.

Caralot: Krozen didn't do this.

Satnak: :confused: Are you serious? You mean for once Krozen isn't the bad guy?

Caralot: Krozen doesn't have the creativity to pull this sort of stuff off. I think the only reason I can understand it is because being connected to Thyrs allows me to think in pure feelings.

Satnak: So can you tell me what's so dangerous about this magical abuse?

Caralot: You know how most if not all the übers have a tortured past? Imagine that purified and sealed in high pressure. And Krozen might just be the thing to set it off.

Satnak: Bloody mol.
rampant

09-16-06, 11:21 AM		Satnak - Pure feelings eh? That sounds like Forbes Department, he's the frigging empath. If things get hairy, he might be the best chance. I'll keep my eyes and ears open, also thanks for letting us piggy back your ceremony it means alot to Serene.

Caralot - No problem.
----------------------------

Igor - I'm here for the Listh of Brithemaids and suth.

Serene - Ours is this one, Caralot Left hers over there.
-----------------------------

Satnak - OK i think I took a wrong turn somewhere.

T-rex ninjas evaporate.

Rose - We are soooooo boned.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-16-06, 12:27 PM		Plot-OOcat: Psst, Kanatash.

Kanatash: :eek: How the fck do you beings do that? :mad: I've got E.B.N.E. powers too, I should know when you're sneaking up on me.

Plot-OOcat: Your not an E.B.N.E. of my level. Even I didn't know I was going to be here until just now.

Kanatash: :confused: E.B.N.E.s have levels?

Plot-OOcat: Let's not get sidetracked. I'm here to tell you that you have blank treasure chart on what Krozen does.

Kanatash: But what about Carlaot? There are worse things for a married man than even I would do!

Plot-OOcat: I've got Caralot wrapped up in my plot thread. She's doing exactly what I want her to do. I'm tired of sitting back while all the other OOcats have fun, and I'm going to create a plot line so devilish that it will ALLOW ME TO RULE THE OOCAT! MWHUHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, WUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA—huh?

Peacekeeper-OOcat: GIYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!

FX demon: *cool anime-style violence*

Kanatash: :uh-huh:

Peacekeeper-OOcat: *ksssh* Dove to Leader. The Thread has been disabled. I repeat, the Thread has been diasbled. Over. *ksssh, beep*

Leader-OOcat?: *beep* Copy that, Dove. We've got the observation room ready. Over. *beep*

Kanatash: Hold on, what's going on here?

Peacekeeper-OOcat: Plot-OOcat is normally kept locked up in an observation room so it can be utilized without tying our entire staff up in a plot-knot. It got out recently and has been trying to create some big thing involving Krozen, Weylin, and trying to destroy the world. We've cleaned everything up: Caralot not being freakish, Weylin needing to be killed, the magical abuse, etc.

Kanatash: Magical abuse?

Satnak: Wait, you're telling me I went through all that dialogue for nothing? :mad:

Peacekeeper-OOcat: Take it up with the management, ma'am.

Wise-OOcat: Did you really want all that baggage happening during your wedding?

Satnak: Good point.

Kanatash: So I can invite Krozen?

Peacekeeper-OOcat: So long as you don't mind Weylin trying to kill him.

Kanatash: :bored: That pretty much describes whatever happens when Krozen comes aboard. Only substitute "drive insane" for kill.
********
13: How many OOcats do you have in there?

OOcat: Way too many.
Crystalforged

09-16-06, 01:25 PM		OOCrystalforged ports in as Plot-OOCat is being dragged off. He and Kanatash just look at each other for a moment before speaking.

Both: (simultaneously) And I thought WE had a split personality.

Kanatash: So, what now?

OOCrystalforged: (shrug) We could always bring Krozen aboard now.

Kanatash: Maybe later, I'm still a little too freaked out right now.
luna18moon

09-16-06, 01:29 PM		Kasei: Refxaneidba!
She falls through the suddenly non-existant floor.
Kasei: Drat it all, not AGAIN! Mewrisdethclw!
Seemingly nothing happens.
Kasei::confused: Usually the floor reappears when I say that. What'd I do?
Elsewhere...
Slaypaw: Ouch! Huh? They seem bigger...
Terra: :blink: Your pregnancy's been accelerated.
Suddenly, in Liam's lab, the screen of the Weirsan Sensor flashes brightly.
Liam: Hmm? *notices record of flash* That person's Weirsan energy keeps spiking. What causes such an increase?
rampant

09-16-06, 01:46 PM		Disarray - I found the hammers.:D
-------------------

Wiersan scanner - Thats it I'm going on strike. (grabs a suitcase and hat as it walks out the door)
---------------------------------

One of the moons descends from its orbit, heading for the Forgotten freedom.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-16-06, 01:52 PM		Both: (simultaneously) And I thought WE had a split personality.
OOC: (bow) :devil:
urial angel of death

09-16-06, 03:28 PM		And the question I'm sure all the veterans are asking: Where the heck is Chrys? Poor Volrath is being denied his sweet lovin' P/Y/R style! :weep: ;)

Volrath: I'm so lonely. :weep:

OOUrial: Damnit Volrath get away from the keyboard!
rampant

09-16-06, 05:44 PM		Satnak sees the falling moon.

Satnak - Dammit E found the hammers.

Leap

Bounce

Bounce

Kick

Satnak - Ok thats back where it goes, but...
-----------------

Disarray - EEEEEEEEEEP

Forbes - No itch powder until you write a 10,000 page essay on why your not allowed to use hammers outside the workshop.
----------------------------

Satnak - Guys!
Kaizer_Ryu

09-16-06, 06:36 PM		OOKaizer: In Karrnath, dead bury you!

Terra: Oh hell.

Lisa: What's up?

OOKaizer: In Aundair, hands raise you!

Terra: He's stuck in Yakov Smirnoff mode!

Lisa: He's so annoying! How'd this happen?

OOKaizer: In Mournland, spell casts you!

Sarah: He was really bored, and just kind of snapped.

Elina: What should we do?

OOKaizer: In Sarlona, mind thinks you!

Lisa: *raises her hammer* Would this work?

Terra: *annoyed* If you don't, I will.

OOKaizer: In Xendric, food eats you!

Sarah: No, me!

Elina: Can I?

Lisa: Feel free.

*FOUR-WAY BEATING*

OOKazier: *on the ground* Ow.

Terra: Wow. I didn't think that'd work.

OOKaizer: *standing up* ...

Lisa: Your welco- oh, crap.

OOKaizer: ...

Terra: Damnit! Now he's stuck in Silent Protagonist mode!

OOKaizer: ...

Sarah: Yes it's a bad thing!

Elina: Do we get to whup on him again?

OOKaizer: ...

Lisa: It's for your own good.

OOKaizer: :eek:
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-16-06, 07:29 PM		OOKaizer: In Sarlona, mind thinks you!
OOcat: It's not so bad once you submit to it.

13: Good, now you will think Greyfeline getting ingredients for another special cake.

Greyfeline journeys into the lower decks in pursuit of the ultimate cake filling.
rampant

09-16-06, 08:13 PM		Satnak - I should have known you guys would show up.:rolleyes:

Forbes - *sarcasm attack* I feel unwanted.

Rixle - Miss the chance to see you in a dress a second time? not gonna happen.

Telfon - He wont shut up about it.

Kratwe - Whoa what happened to you?

Disarray - (oozing along the cieling) I probably should have asked about that.

Illis - Yes, yes you should have.

Gisen - Who are you.

Satnak - I am Satnak d'Borisheel, who are you little one?

Gisen - I'm Gisen.

Satnak - Yours Illis?

Illis - Yep, show her your trick son.

Gisen - Yay! grrrrrr *thicken skin*

Young Gisen's skin shifts and thickens to form an armored layer.

Satnak - hmmmmm, try focusing the change around your hands, you can use it to handle spiky things.

Tendra - Hello

Satnak - Ahhh given the hair I'd geuss that makes you Tendra, I'm really sorry for not making the wedding, someone forgot to warn me about the shifts it might cause.

Disarray - Why is everyone looking at me?

LEvy - Eh no prob little sister.

Satnak - OH I outta introduce you to Serene.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-17-06, 01:09 PM		*cricket* *cricket*

OOKaizer: Where is everyone?

Lisa: I have no idea. You're the Entity. You should know these things.

OOKaizer: Oh, well. Since no ones posting, it seems like as good a time as any to be silly. :plotting:

Lisa: I'm not going to like this, am I?

OOKaizer: It's a possibility. BOHOLD!

Sarah: HAIL! TERRAPALAZZO!!!

Terra: *DRAMATIC POSE* The world is full of fools...

Elina: Hail! Terrapalaz- *gurk*

Elina falls over dead, blood dripping out the side of her mouth. Sarah runs over and begins performing CPR.

Sarah: :eek: NotagainLin-chanhowmanytimestodayisthatIreallythinky ouneedtogetthatlookedat-

Terra: Is something wrong, Sarah-kun?

Sarah: *standing up and saluting* Nothing!

Elina: *weakly* Arigato, sempai.

Lisa: This makes no sense.

OOKaizer: :D That's the point.

Terra: *sweeps the cape away DRAMATICALLY* We here at A.C.R.O.S.S. shall lead the fools of the world to a utopia led by me!

Sarah: *clapping wildly* All will bow before the wisdom of Terrapalazzo!

Elina: *in a hospital bed* Your vision shall inspi- *flatlines*

Sarah: :eek: ThereyougoagainIwonderwhatthedealisewist hatbloodgahit'sonmeyourbleedingalloverme-

Lisa: :twitch:

OOKaizer: Oh, come on. It's not that bad.

Rose comes out with an afro and a tacky outfit.

OOKaizer: Ok, maybe it went farther than intended...
rampant

09-17-06, 01:36 PM		Satnak - Hey Serene the guys wanted to...

Rixle - *snicker*

Ketty - :eek:

Serene - :eek:

Levy - :lol:

Forbes - :rofl:

Kratwe - There's gonna be blood tonight.:D

Telfon - I don't get it? whats so funny?

Illis - :snicker:

Gisen - :confused:

Tendra - Oh my *snicker* musn't ...hehe... Laugh.


One of the albums crystals is projecting an image of toddler Satnak trying to escape a bath in progress.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-17-06, 02:30 PM		Two Redshirts creep down a hall, crossbows loaded, as they watch for the inevitable doom that awaits them.

Redshirt 1: It's been awfully quiet lately.

Redshirt 2: Yeah. No purges in at least a day. I'm getting worried.

As they walk, they come across a strangely cute, yet creepy creature.

Soulsnuggle: Pu-chu?

Redshirt 1: The hell...?

Redshirt 2: It's creepy...

Redshirt 1: Yeah...but...

Soulsnuggle: Pu-chu pu-chu pu-chu!

Both: :love: IT'S SO CUTE!

They begin uncontrollably cuddling the abomination as it proceeds to steal their souls.

***

Soulsnuggle: Pu-chu?

Sarah: Kawaii...

Soulsnuggle: Pu-chu!

Sarah: It's really kawaii...

Soulsnuggle: Pu-chu. *reaches out to hug her*

*KNUCKLE SANDWICH*

Sarah: BUT WHAT THE HELL IS IT?!?!

Soulsnuggle: *flying towards the horizon* PU-CHUUUUUUUUU.........

Rose (as Nabeshin) can be seen in the background running from some shady characters.

Quench: :love: Arf!

Sarah: Ah hah! There you are, Menchi!

Quench: :confused: Woof?

Quench suddenly finds himself bound on top of Sarah's head.

Sarah: There! Now that I have my emergency food supply...

Quench: :eek: Bow! :weep:

Sarah: ...I am ready to continue my work for the glory of A.C.R.O.S.S.! Hail! Terrapalazzo!

Elina: *deathly pale* Sempai... *collapse*

Sarah: Wahhhh! NotagainLin-chanyou'rereallyfreakingmeoutohwhatistha tcomingoutofyourmouthewitsonmyhandcomeon Lin-chanpullyourselftogether-
Charles Phipps

09-17-06, 04:50 PM		OOC: I salute you truly Kaiser, Excel Saga jokes are the best ones ever.

***

Forgotten Freedom Saga Part 2

Michael: GAWD DAMNIT! I am so sick of being another office drone down to his last copper.

Doog: Eh don't be such a drip. I just intend to leach off you for alittle while.

Bullet Tooth Tony: *anxiety symbol*

Captain Jarlot: YOU THREE MUST JOIN MY DAITAZEN FIGHTING FORCE!

Slip: I'll take a memo.

Andrea: This is utterly beneath my abilities.

*camera pans to Andrea's butt, bossoms, and legs*

Andrea: MY EYES ARE UP HERE!

***

Ishmael Junior: Oh woe.

Sarah: What's wrong Mister Red Shirt man?

Ishmael Junior: Poor Ishmael is mourning the fact that he works 20 hours out of the day for the Forgotten Freedom's rowing team and that leaves him no time to visit his Sexy Wife or his little son Ishmael III.

Sarah: *KICKS Ishmael Junior* ISHMAEL YOU FOOL!

Ishmael Junior: Ishmael is in pain!

Sarah: If you really love your son and your wife is really sexy then you will WORK AND SLAVE for them until YOU DROP!

Ishmael Junior: Ishmael is shocked!

Sarah: Now get out there and WORK DOG! WORK!

Ishmael Junior: Thank you Miss Sarah! I have a new lease on life! I will never again take for granted my employment here!

*Ismael Junior is hit with the mast as his head busts open and he falls to the ground bleeding to death*

Sarah: Well back to work!

*Sarah trots off*

Ishmael Junior: Wait! MISSS SAARAHHHHHhhhhhh....

Aerith: Oh Ishmael, do not worry for I AM THE WILL OF THE MACROCHASM.

Ishmael Junior: The what?

Aerith: Lynn Minmei is already the will of the Macross. I shall heal you of all your mortal wounds and send you back to your sexy wife and Ishmael III.

Ishmael Junior: Ishmael Junior is grateful!

Aerith: *Aerith's watch beeps* Whoops, sorry, gotta go!

*Aerith flies away*

Ishmael Junior: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
urial angel of death

09-17-06, 05:02 PM		OOC: Paying homage to one of the characters who inspired Volrath, but I forgot to mention.

Volrath: Come on uncle. This could be your last chance before your tied down. You won't have enough free time anymore.

Kanatash: Why would that be a motivation. You're usually the one who gets to do all the fun stuff.

Volrath: It could score us big points with the ones up top.

Kanatash: Fine, but who are the hits.

Volrath: There's a meeting of the leaders of the dragonmarked houses. After all you know how corrupt they are.

Kanatash: We'll need new weapons.

Volrath: Yeah when we left they took away the anti-matter blade.

Kanatash: Come on then no time to waste
--------
At a weapon's shop in Thronehold.

Weapon Salesman: *holding a large serrated whip* We call this piece the Fecalator. One look at it and the target ***** him or herself. Try it on.

Volrath: Well, it's a lot more compact than the anit-matter sword, but it's not nearly as impressive. Just doesn't have that Wrath-of-the-Elder gods edge to it. I mean, come on, how am I supposed to strike fear into the hearts of the wicked with this thing? Look at this...

Kanatash: Well, then, you know, don't use a whip. Just lay the place to waste, like.

Volrath: Easy for you to say. You get off light in razing. You got to stand there and read at Mystara and Kyrnn, I had to do all the work.

Kanatash: What work did you do? You started a few blackholes.

Volrath: I ripped a void in reality, man, there's a subtle difference.

Kanatash: Oh, yeah, I'm sure.

Volrath: Hey, you know, **** you, man. Any moron with a partical accelerator can open blackholes. Ripping reality is like an endurance trial man. Mass genocide is the most exhausting activity one can engage in, outside of soccer.

The weapons salesman looks very worried and slowly backs away.
rampant

09-17-06, 05:12 PM		Sarah - Its not.

Elina - Satnak's ragging obstacle course is.

Sarah - I swear that finish line is getting farther away every time.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-17-06, 05:33 PM		OOcat: I tried Excel Saga, the jokes just had no wit. :rant:

13: He's about to go off on another useless rant. :rolleyes: Quick, somebody come up with something for him to do.

Silver: Let's do our own anime reference. I vote cute girls! :D

Bunny: :bored: As opposed to?

Silver: Huge freakin' bouncy!

Bunny: Those who do not get that, thank your god.

Silver: :thinks: Of course, I think you can have both—

Bunny: :rolleyes: Let's try not to get carried away.

13: 1. Cute girls. What's next?

Silver: I can think of three genres: android—

OOcat: I'm getting tired of creating new characters.

Silver: —magical girl—

Bunny: Covered already.

Silver: —and harem.

13: There're enough unused women aboard for that to work.

Bunny: But who's going to be the schmuck?

Devon: —

Bunny whips out a huge space-age ray gun and blasts Devon.

Bunny: Next!
urial angel of death

09-17-06, 05:51 PM		OOC: I finally figured out why I have an irrational hatred of Terrek and who he reminds me of, Dr. Doom. ;) Then again this might just be me because Chalky reminds me of Gizmo while he was insane.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-17-06, 06:40 PM		OOC: I salute you truly Kaiser, Excel Saga jokes are the best ones ever.
:D

Ishmael Junior: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
YES!!!! WE HAVE PEDRO SIGN!!!!!!

I was wondering who to make Pedro. As far as the three losers, Michael and Doog were actually my first two choices, as well as Andrea for Misaki. I thought about using Satnak, but she was busy (as well as the fact that I like living :D).

OOcat: I tried Excel Saga, the jokes just had no wit.Did you try the Dubbed or the Subbed version? While the woman who does Excel's voice in the English version matches her tempo quite admirably, I never liked the voice. As usual, the original is much better. Besides, it's not intended to be witty. Just insane. :P :D

I don't really have a point to this other than to amuse me (as usual), so feel free to do what you want with this bit of crazyness.

IC:

Quench is garbed in a nnja outfit as he attempts to sneak away.

Sarah: Ah HAH!

Quench: :eek:

*grab*

Quench: :weep: *struggle*

Sarah: My, you sure are energetic today! Don't over exert yourself, though. You'll become all tough and gamy.

Quench: :ghosted:

Rose is seen in the background in a massive gunfight with 3 dozen generic MIB. He is winning.

Sarah: Huh? What happened? Where did all your energy go? Oh well. *ties him back on her head and pulls out a GIANT scimitar* Time to begin the purge of all those who would corrupt the people with their filth!

Elina: All for Terrapalazzo-sama... *blood drips out her mouth*

Sarah: Come, Lin-chan! Our first target is...THE ENTITES FROM BEYOND NON-EXISTANCE!

OOKaizer: Say WHAT?!

*UNIMAGINABLE GORE*

(later)

Aerith: What have I told you about killing your creator?

Sarah: *anime sweatdrop* Eh heh heh...

Aerith: I shall use my power as the Great Will of the Macrocosm to restart the post. *light shines*

****

Sarah & Elina: HAIL! TERRAPALAZZO-SAMA!!!

Terra: Though it is our destiny to conquer this world...

Sarah: As it should be!

Terra: The people are not yet ready to accept our benevolent rule.

Elina: *in a wheelchair with an IV* What shall we do to bring about your utopia?

Terra: We must begin by ridding the world of negative influences. *hold up a suitcase* This is a gift for a contact in Breland. His goal is to bring down the corrupt government that enslaves the masses.

Sarah: A just goal!

Elina: *wearing an oxygen mask* How are we to recognize him?

Terra: He wears a smiling white mask at all times. I shall give you the rendezvous point. You are to meet him there at 1700 hours.

Sarah: HAIL! TERRAPALAZZO-SAMA!!!

Elina: Hail! Terrapal- *collapse*
urial angel of death

09-17-06, 06:54 PM		V in the Excel Saga :twitch: *the green paste that was once OOUrial's brain explodes out of his fragmenting skull*
Kaizer_Ryu

09-17-06, 06:57 PM		V in the Excel Saga :twitch: *the green paste that was once OOUrial's brain explodes out of his fragmenting skull*
OOKaizer does his happy dance at having broken what was left of his DM's brain.

:dancin: :dancin: :dancin:
urial angel of death

09-17-06, 07:04 PM		OOUrial's reanimate corpse decides that his group's next adventure will be Against the Giants at level 6 using 3rd edition powered giants.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-17-06, 07:11 PM		OORei beats OOKaizer to a bloody pulp for opening his big fat mouth, then presents OOUrial with the offering of OOKaizer's big, juicy soul as appeasement.
rampant

09-17-06, 07:22 PM		Satnak - Ketty,... (deadly quiet)You should have found me immediatly if had discovered any of our parents old things....:twitch: breathe out...breathe in...breathe out.

Kratwe - oh...

Levy - ...my...

Forbes - ...lanta...

Rixle - Satnak,... not bashing in face

Telfon - Dark times indeed...

Ketty - (i.h.h. i'm gonna die, i'm gonna die, again?)

Serene - Satnak, calm down its just baby pictures!

Satnak - The problem is she, didn't tell me she found some of our parents things, and didn't tell me.

Ketty - (scared quiet)It was in the box with the swords, I just grabbed the whole thing and ran. I thought you found it when you finished with Toren, and just left it or something.

Satnak - *sigh*

Kratwe - :confused: the hell?

Satnak - Now that thats cleared up. Kratwe You've met her, but you didn't a proper intro. Guys this is Serene, my....ummm whats that word?

Serene - Fiance

Ketty - Wife

Serene - According to you maybe, but I can't feel comefortable claiming that without a ceremony of some sort.

Kratwe - Seriously whats wrong with you Satnak?

Satnak - Huh?... nothing. This is Rixle, if he gets too friendly yank his ear hard and away. Anything else he'll take as a come on.

Rixle - Charmed my good lady. Satnak you sneak, you went here and grabbed up the best looking girl in the dimension for yourself, before we got a chance.

Serene - :embarrass

Satnak - :rolleyes: Moving on, Serene this Telfon. Ask him for your coin purse back.

Telfon - Hehe...(hands over the bag)

Satnak - This is Forbes, he's a smart alec. Just don't touch him.

Serene - Huh?:confused:

Forbes - I don't wear this body suit for my health. Oustide of my ... troublesomely large serpent forms, anyone touching me is linked to my empathic system. Its a nasty shock, if a grip is maintained it can be fatal.

Satnak - Finally, this is Levy.

Serene - I see, well Levy I have heard of you and I have two things to say. One, thank you for helping Satnak become the amazing woman I love. The second,

*SLAP*

How dare you hurt her like that. Ten years you *****.

Satnak - (i.h.h. that was so ... hot) Um Serene do you think we should go get a drink or something?

Serene - Yes.

-both exit-

Kratwe - What is wrong whith her?

Levy - :confused:
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-17-06, 08:00 PM		Forbes - …anyone touching me is linked to my empathic system.
OOcat: GROUP HUG!

The Non-Existant Entities tackle Forbes.

Forbes: AAAHHHHH!!!!! NO! Get off me…………huh. Nothing's happening.

Bunny: Why would that matter?
Its a nasty shock, if a grip is maintained it can be fatal.
Bunny: For who? Seriously, this is going in my record books.

OOcat: Non-existant entities don't exist, so they can't trigger abilities like that.

Forbes: Oh, okay. Still, IT'S REALLY CREEPY TO BE HUGGED BY COMPLETE STRANGERS!

The NEEs let go.

Silver: :lightbulb Hey, Forbes could be the schmuck.

13: No, no, no, the condition should be non-fatal and only works around women.

Silver: Hmm, point. Hey, are any of you guys afraid of women?

Illis: You're talking to people who grew up with Satnak.

Silver: Ooooo, too many choices.

Bunny checks his watch (Bugs Bunny :D). Then he takes a list out of his pocket.

Bunny: Scuse me, I've got to go kill Elina…………and some guy named Charles Phipps. Again. I wish that Macrocosm would just leave them dead.

OOC: I only ever got through the first disk of Excel Saga.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-17-06, 08:22 PM		Bunny: Scuse me, I've got to go kill Elina…………and some guy named Charles Phipps. Again. I wish that Macrocosm would just leave them dead.
OOKaizer: Elina is currently immune to true death. It's part of being Ha-chan.

Bunny: :mad: You know how I feel about that.

OOKaizer: It's only until I get bored with this.

Bunny: And that will be...?

OOKaizer: Not telling. :P
urial angel of death

09-17-06, 08:59 PM		OOUrial devours OOKaizer's soul in a messy fashion.

OOUrial: *licking his lips* Tasted a bit off.

OOWill (another one of the players in our group) : Doesn't he need that?

OOUrial: Never seemed to use it before. *belch*
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-17-06, 09:44 PM		OOKaizer: Elina is currently immune to true death. It's part of being Ha-chan.

Bunny: :mad: You know how I feel about that.
Bunny: And I'll have you know that I get called out to every person who flatlines.

OOKaizer: Really? :confused: I was under the impression that you were only death when there was…you know…dead death.

Bunny: A heart stopping is death. I work under Silvercat rules, which states that death is any time at which a body can no longer perform its vital functions.

OOKaizer: So what's so bad about undead? I thought you didn't like them.

Bunny: I don't. Means I have to deal with them every time they stop working. Gets annoying.

OOKaizer: So you don't deal with souls?

Bunny: I've got to tell you, souls are the most useless part of a living being. I'm surprised devils keep taking them as payment.
rampant

09-17-06, 09:52 PM		Tirmek - They do it because it bugs the angels.

Sarah - How..

Tirmek - *freaking ninja on speed glare* don't ask.
Phantomcrossing

09-17-06, 10:08 PM		http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Norbaz

A thin cut exudes from shimmering air in the dead of night on the deck of the forgotten freedom, it widens as a large hand reaches though and grabs onto the rail upon the edge of the ship. A large figure slowly pulls himself through this hole, that seals almost immediately behind him as his tattered cloaked form hits the ground with a thud. The half giant bares signs of malnutrition, insomnia, and is generally disheveled.

Norbaz: heh heh hehhehehehehehe.

He chuckles to himself as he looks to the night sky, as though he had not seen it in quite some time.

Norbaz: Free...I made it out, finally. I thought I'd never be back here again. I'M FREE!

Raising his arms triumphantly to the sky with his shout, the halfgiant rises to his full stature in celebration of his freedom a voice sounds from the front of the ship.

John the Awakened Keel: Norbaz? Is that you? No one's heard anything from you in months.

Norbaz: John? Oh, well there's quite the simple explanation for that, I was locked up somewhere in Andrea's extradimensional mansion....Now if you'll excuse me, I believe I need to collapse here on deck so I can recover a bit before I go to see the captain about getting my job back. Good night.

*THUD*

OOC: WOO! I'm back, if a little belated.
cypher_zero

09-17-06, 11:46 PM		OOC: Urial - I'm sorry you dislike Terrek so much. His personality (as I've said before) actually based off aspects of my own taken to the extreme. Now that I think about it, he does resemble Dr. Doom in a lot of ways doesn't he? My therapist is going to have a feild day with that one! (Disclaimer: I don't actually have a therapist. None would take me.) Actually, I'm a big fan of Dr. Doom... and Black Mage. Doom doom doom doom doooooooooooom!

cypher
rampant

09-18-06, 12:06 AM		Terrek - Listen the making out I get, but why in my quarters?

Serene - Its still technically my room.

Terrek - Yes but why are you in it?

Satnak - We needed some time to get away from all the people a bit.

Terrek - Satnak :doh: Which of kanatash's friends did you **** off?

Serene - I,... Kinda sorta slapped Levy *anime sweat drop*

Terrek - Oh come on your the nice one for crying out loud!!

Serene - She hurt Satnak. No one does that to my woman!...Oh my gods... I sound like you.

Satnak - :eek:
Charles Phipps

09-18-06, 12:31 AM		OOC: Don't take it so hard. Poor Terrek is always the odd man out though.

Kanatash: This place has gotten WAY too weird lately.

Puchu: Pu-chu.

Kanatash: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHH!

***

Ishmael Junior: Well at least I shall be able to at last visit my sexy wife as a ghost.

Terrek: Oh thank you Miss Sexy Wife. It was the best. Now, back to conquering the world.

Sexy Wife Marish: You are truly a bull me corazone.

Ishmael III: Papa!

*Ishmael III hugs Terrek*

Sexy Wife Marish: And I am...yes...even pregnant with your child.

Terrek: Yes, my child and not at all that loser no one misses.

Sexy Wife Marish: Yes I do not even remember whatshisname.

Ishmael III: I am named after him and I don't remember!

*all three laugh*

Ishmael Junior: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO!
rampant

09-18-06, 12:38 AM		Ishmael jr. - The only thing that could make it worse is if that cat was here to shred my pants and leg....

I'm waiting.

OORampant - Sorry, but he's busy whith the mother of his kittens.

Ishmael jr. - you mean...

OORampant - He's got more important things to do.

Ishmael jr. - :twitch:
-------------------------

OOC: Ahhh the smell of a broken ego. Just what the morning needs.:D

Oh wait its night? nevermind then.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-18-06, 01:08 AM		Sarah & Elina: HAIL! TERRAPALAZZO-SAMA!!!!

Terra: [long speech about why A.C.R.O.S.S. should rule the world, sure to include lots of DRAMATIC poses and ACTING]

Elina: *rapid clapping* Such inspiring words!

Sarah: Terrapalazzo-sama is truly the one who shall bring the uneducated masses into bliss! HOORAY!!!

Terra: *smug yet humble look* Thank you, my underlings. Your praise is-

Sarah: *bouncing and dancing around* Yay! Terra-terra-terra-pala-pala-pala-BANZAI!

Terra raises her hand and a rope comes down from seemingly nowhere.

Sarah: *sing-song* Terrapalazzo-sama! Hooray for A.C.R.-

*yank*

-AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

And down the pit she goes.

Sarah: Iwaswonderingwhenthiswasgonnacomeupthepi tisoneofthemorefamouspartsoftheseriesbut wowit'sreallydeepIwonderhowfaritgoesIcan 'tevenseethebottomreallydoesithavetobeth isdeepIthinkIhearsomethi-*SPLOOSH*

During her fall, Sarah spies Rose hanging on to a ledge about half-way down (still as Nabeshin).

Terra: *DRAMATIC POSE* The moment our goals are achieved draws ever closer!

Elina: *starry-eyed admiration*

Sarah: *climbing out of the hole, soaking wet* Terrapalazzo-sama is wise and fair!

*yank*

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

*****

Ishmael Jr. walks/floats dejectedly away from his sexy wife and young son. As he heads down the road, he passes a male Kalashtar. The man moves to avoid him, surprising Ishmael Jr.

Ishmael Jr.: You can see me? Can you hear me?! Then please help me give a message to my sexy wife and my son!

Kalashtar: :confused: adfakf ukrjan iadfgbhj?

Ishmael Jr.: *GASP* He can't understand me?!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-18-06, 07:18 AM		OOC: I have to tell you guys, you do Excel Saga a lot better than Excel Saga. :D

IC: Once Norbaz wakes up, he heads immediately for his kitchen before Satnak can find him and beat the life out of him for not being around to make good chilli.

However he finds the kitchen already occupied by a round, dark-skinned human female furiously cooking and giving orders to a giant spider.

Darastrix: Dharguun chilli powder!

A tin of chilli powder floats over and she snatches it out of the air before pouring the entire thing into the bubbling stew pot.

Darastrix: Shadow Marches gator meat! Karnnathi sausage!

Next she steps over to a huge pan where some kind of meat is frying, though it doesn't look much like chicken. The woman hefts the huge pan in one hand flips each piece in about a quarter-second, all 35 of them.

Norbaz (timidly): Excuse me—

Darastrix: *woman glare* Are you the cook here?

Norbaz: Uh, yes?

Darastrix: What are you feeding these poor children? They're nothing but skin and bones!

Norbaz: Uh, I do make the chilli—

Darastrix: Ha! Real chilli melts your soul and not your stomach.…………Well, don't just stand there being useless, watch this pot of greens over here!

Norbaz: Yes'm!

OOC: Darastrix: combination chief, ninja, and drill instructor.
urial angel of death

09-18-06, 07:25 AM		OOC: Urial - I'm sorry you dislike Terrek so much. His personality (as I've said before) actually based off aspects of my own taken to the extreme. Now that I think about it, he does resemble Dr. Doom in a lot of ways doesn't he? My therapist is going to have a feild day with that one! (Disclaimer: I don't actually have a therapist. None would take me.) Actually, I'm a big fan of Dr. Doom... and Black Mage. Doom doom doom doom doooooooooooom!

cypher

Nothing personal I just develop irrational hatreds of certain fictional characters and real-life people sometimes. Like at one time I hated Bolt-tooth Tony above all else. In fact I also used to hate Rei. I eventually get over it. ;)
rampant

09-18-06, 09:51 AM		OOC: There are worse villians to be compared to. I always liked Dr.Doom (not so much this new version though), and Black mage will always occupy a maximum security cell in my heart. NO wonder I like messing with Terrek.:D :P
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-18-06, 10:22 AM		OOC: There are worse villians to be compared to. I always liked Dr.Doom (not so much this new version though), and Black mage will always occupy a maximum security cell in my heart. NO wonder I like messing with Terrek.:D :P
OOC: But Black Mage is a clueless psychotic murderer, and Terrek isn't clueless, he's not ever psychotic, and when you're not those things being a murderer is just sad. Terrek needs a funny gimmick. There are no other characters aboard who only do serious stuff (even Sa'vor and crew occasionally do something silly).
rampant

09-18-06, 10:28 AM		Dating service
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-18-06, 10:43 AM		OOcat: Maybe Terrek could be the schmuck?

Silver: Too evil, powerful, creepy………he's just not snuggle-worthy.
rampant

09-18-06, 12:49 PM		Terrek - At this rate Serene will be teaching the kids swordplay, while Satnak makes cookies:rolleyes:

Satnak - I can cook*miffed*
Crystalforged

09-18-06, 02:50 PM		Kanatash: Damn, you've been lazy lately. I thought you were the one who wanted to get this wedding thing up and going but it looks like your get up and go got up and left.

OOCrystalforged: Bite me, okay? I've got an exam today, an assignment due in two days, and another assignment plus a second exam by the end of the week.

Kanatash: So you've been spending all your time on schoolwork?

OOCrystalforged: Yes, and a few other things.

Kanatash: So what am I supposed to do? Just sit around and look pretty here? I need something to keep me occupied. How about I-

OOCrystalforged: No. Not a chance in hell. You're not going anywhere near my homework ever again.

Kanatash: Oh, come on! I put down Surrendervitz as the capital of France ONE TIME, and I'm banned for life? Give a man a break!

OOCrystalforged: One time? What about when you tried to slip the summoning ritual for deep spawn into my history report?

Kanatash: Well maybe two times then.

OOCrystalforged: And the book report on Necromonicon?

Kanatash: FINE! Have it your way.
rwarner3701

09-18-06, 03:51 PM		Martha approaches Terra and Lisa’s room carrying a couple of packages. Gregory is standing attentively outside the door and snaps to attention as she approaches.

Martha: What a fine young lad you are standing out here for Lisa.

Gregory: Thank you, it’s a shame she doesn’t have time for me.

Martha: Well dear she does have a lot on her plate at most times but I’m sure she appreciates your determination. She even trusts you to protect her family by guarding the door.

Gregory: Well I guess that is true but it just seems so pointless.

Martha: Not everyday can be exciting. The times you remember will be the few exceptions when something extraordinary happens and you step up to save the day. Most of your life will be spent waiting for those few times.

Gregory: I suppose, I just thought life as a paladin would be more exciting.

Martha: It is also important to cherish the small things. Balance is an important part of any life.

Gregory: Thank you Miss Greyholm I’ll try to remember that.

Martha: Good do you think I could see Lisa or Terra?

Gregory: Of course (opens the door and calls to Lisa)

Martha: See dear you are more important than you think.

Martha steps into the room and Gregory closes the door. Lisa comes out and greets Martha.

Martha: That is a fine lad you have out there protecting your door. You are lucky to have him.

Lisa: Yes he is certainly dedicated.

Martha: That is what I was just telling him. He seems to think that you don’t appreciate the work he does.

Lisa: With everything that has been going on it’s hard to find the time.

Martha: Well remember that our friends are what define us, speaking of which I have some gifts for your daughters.

Lisa: How nice of you, sweaters I would guess.

Martha: Of course deary but also something else for when they do that shape changing thing. Can you guess?

Lisa: Umm… no.

Martha: (holding up the smaller packages) Booties. To make sure they keep their feet warm while they are out running around like little animals.

Lisa: Oh… I’m sure they will love them.

Martha: Well I’ll let you give them to them later I have to get back to my kitchen it is a dreadful mess for some reason.

----
Sarah and Elina are getting ready for school when Terra walks in and hands them each a package.

Terra: These are from your aunt Martha. You should wear them to school today.

Elina and Sarah open the packages and find the orange and green sweaters with their first initial on them.

Elina & Sarah: …

Terra: You’ll look so cute and Martha would love to see you in them.

Elina: But mom…

Terra: No buts you need to learn to respect your elders.

Elina: Fine

Terra walks back out and the girls change. After seeing them off to the school portal Lisa turns to Terra.

Lisa: Wasn’t that kind of cruel?

Terra: Maybe but you have to admit it is hilarious.

Lisa: Well yeah it is. You aren’t going to make them wear the booties too are you?

Terra: No, poor fashion is one thing but interfering with functionality is completely different. Natural weapons are one of the greatest benefits of shape changing.
rampant

09-18-06, 03:54 PM		Tirmek and Tellowas - :rofl::rofl::rofl:

Sarah and Elina - :headexplo
urial angel of death

09-18-06, 04:31 PM		The leaders of the dragonmarked houses are sitting mortified as Kanatash walks behind them reading off each of their greatest sins.

Kanatash: You mister d'Cannith hired a hitman to kill your pregent girlfriend because you were afraid of commitment. Ah heir to house Deneith you host a halfling fighting pit in your basement and will even substitute children if the halfling slave population gets low. D'Ghallanda you will chop up guests who can't pay the rent at your inn and serve them to the next group to come through. Jorasco you kidnap orphans and test new medicines on them. Kundarak you murdered your father to ascend to your current position. Mister Lyrandar has a tentacle fetish that he takes out on his maids. Medani you used your foresight to swindle people out of millions of gold, their entire life savings sometimes. D'Orien you ordered the killing of several negotiators in order to keep the Last War going so you could keep those army caravan contracts. Phiarlan you enslave young girls to work in your "special" entertainment rooms to increase your already considerable banks holdings. Sivis you have falsified numerous bank statements to sieze them and leave their original owners penniless. Tharashk you have humted down escaped slaves and returned them to their abusive masters. Vadalis you killed every lycanthrope that came to your door asking for a help during the Silver Flame's purge to "prove your loyalty". Finally we come to Thuranni you on the other hand are not guilty of any grievous sin. You're a pure soul, good for you.

*most of the group has been reduced to tears of guilt*

Volrath: *Achoo!* Now you all will be punished by the rath of the Elder Gods for your sins. *pulls out whip* Now say your prayers.

*due to excel saga influence the gory bloodfest is replaced with pictures of flowers and easy listening music is played. This is still not enough to drown out the screams thoug*

The scene returns and all of the dragonmarked heirs are either dead or close to it, except the Thuranni leader. She/he (not sure and am too lazy to look) is standing in the middle drenched in blood and absolutely terrified.

Volrath: You have done nothing wrong. You're free to go. *lifts up whip* But did you say "Host bless you" when I sneezed!

Kanatash: VOLRATH!

Volrath: Alright *leaves*

OOC: Too lazy to find actually script so I did it all from memory.
Charles Phipps

09-18-06, 05:12 PM		Well Volrath is either ruined for me or close to my favorite character.

;-)
urial angel of death

09-18-06, 05:15 PM		I'm confused. :confused:
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-18-06, 05:22 PM		Ash is relazing on deck as he pages through his mail.
"Lets see, 'Nuns and Blamo!' the Thrane periodical of church santioned pyrotechnics... Some kindling [junk mail]... the new Cannith weapons cataloge... 'Thurani Review' for the assasin on the go, dont know why I subscribed to that, the tutorials are lousy... Heres something..." He reaches a flyer that reads

The Five nations Conflagaration championships [And cookout] is seeking contestants in the feild of competitave Demolitions and Imolatave exelence... [details the history of the contest, evolving from the rivalrys of difering units of seige engeears and combat mages to a multinatonal event with major medea coverage and sponsorships]... Teams of no less than 5 aplicants should contact there local Sivis message centre to log there aplication. The winning team will receve a platnum troply, 5,000,000 gold and servases and goods from the sponsoring houses, yet to be confirmed, and a gartentted place as defending champion at the next event in 5 years time.

"Its a slow period, hmm, but my fellow competitors are going to need to be good. hmmm." He teleports away.

Nalfen is in his rooms, studying his arcanabla.
Ash "Nalfen?"

Nalfen "Wh- dont do that! What the heck do you want any way?"

Ash "I'm here to offer you the chanse to make a million gold, gain fame, and get groupies, but since you dont want me to do that." shurgs, begins drifting to the door.

Nalfen "Groupies?"

Ash "Dosens, ok, moast are scarred mentaly from the war, but in there eyes men like you and I, powerful men, able to unleash sweet conflageration with thougt and word, are kings."

Nalfen "What are you planning?" ash hands him a flyer. "Im in, but Im captain."

Ash "As they say in Aundar 'Au contrare' my contacts, my info, my captancy."

Nalfen "fair enough. so who else do you have?"

Ash "I thought Aurixirthos, hes passable, if rather slow to spark, and Pholli, but he has an iratonal mistrust of me, cant think why :angelhide we would still have a place to fill. Idealy no one too powerfull. I dont think iether of us want to share the fame any more than we must."

Nalfen "Good thinking, get back to me if you find someone"

Ash nods, bows, disapears.

(aplicants to seek out Ash, captain of Team Freedom.)
Charles Phipps

09-18-06, 06:34 PM		OOC: He's now forever Loki in my mind.

IC:

*Now for another anime entirely*

Zella: *her bossom size now three sizes larger and wearing a miniskirt* Ohhhhhhhhh ROSSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

*A lightning car similiar to a 1970s roadster bursts through a nearby window as Rose is wearing a Red Jacket with HUGE sideburns, Bruce Ki is dressed like a samurai all the while muttering "I'm not from Rokugan damnit!", and Michael has a long thick hat while he fires his crossbow behind him with deadly accuracy*

Rose: Hello Zella-chan!

*Jacob Hunter runs after them in a thick trenchcoat and hat swinging handcuffs*

Jacob:ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-18-06, 06:37 PM		Chanse "But I'm Jiggen!" :weep: "Useles EBNE lusing intrest in me..."
Charles Phipps

09-18-06, 07:00 PM		Michael: I'll duel you for it!

Chanse: Yeah.

Michael: Well...

*Michael falls over*

Chanse: I win.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-18-06, 07:06 PM		OOC: Too lazy to find actually script so I did it all from memory.
Bunny: Schmuck search on hold.

Silver: Why? I've got it nearly narrowed down.

Bunny: We need find the last descendant of Tira Miron, one sex-obsessed and one silent street guy, the lesbian follower of Tira that no one talks about, and a stripper muse. We need to do this before Kanatash and Volrath reach a Silver Flame church that is is celebrating its centennial and offering anyone who walks through its doors a free blank slate, which if Volrath and Kanatash take will thus allow them to get into the flame and thus prove it fallible and destroy the world. Can you imagine the work load I'll have?
rampant

09-18-06, 07:49 PM		Chalky - I'm in!

Ash - Your no Pyro?!

Chalky - true but my Tangle paint makes everything more flammable, and With a little work me and Pholly could have a nice prep bomb that should be able to smear across buildings.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-18-06, 07:50 PM		Plot-OOcat: Those fools thought I was gone for good, but my insideous plan to plan a harem anime reference is going as planned. Once they find the schmuck THERE SHALL BE NO STOPPING ME! MWAHAHAHAHAHA, MWHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Fem-OOcat: :headexplo

Plot-OOcat: :eek:

*ANGRY FEMALE STRIKE!*
********
Bunny: So long as there's no three-episode battles. Anyone who can't kill their opponent in under 2 minutes isn't worth a flashy move.

Silver: Jiggle counter on.

13: Do embarrassing nude situations fall under my jurisdiction or Silver's?
rampant

09-18-06, 08:39 PM		OOC: Again this is why I keep mine all chained up together.

OOCat - Pompous windbag!

OORampant - *pulls out superscope* Speak up, my friend didn't quite hear you.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-18-06, 09:03 PM		OOC: Well, since it appears that everyone got bored with the Excel Saga humor, I'll explain how they get out of it. And Gregory still hasn't got the "stand around and look important" bit right, so I haven't been using him ;) .

IC:

Within Terra and Lisa's room, Sarah and Elina lie on the bed holding icepacks on their heads as Terra lies on the couch doing the same. Lisa watches over them with no small amount of relief.

Terra: Ugh...that is the LAST time I watch an anime series from beginning to end...

Elina: I still taste blood...

Sarah: ... *she lost her voice from all the talking*

Lisa: If you three are ok for now, I'm gonna return these to Ketler. *holds up two sets of DVDs*

*****

Ketler: Did it work?

Lisa: Like a charm. They're back to normal insane.

Ketler: There's no amount of funny insane that Serial Experiments: Lain can't cure.

Lisa: It even had the added bonus of the girls swearing off all drugs for eternity.

Ketler: (i.h.h. :censored: ) Oh, that's great.
Crystalforged

09-18-06, 09:17 PM		All is a quiet (cough), peaceful (coughcough) day on the Forgotten Freedom. Nothing out of the ordinary is going on. The crew is just going about their daily business.



...until the Gnome paratroopers suddenly descend from the sky. Each diminutive warrior is carrying a myriad of magical devices including a repeating crossbow which they are firing down upon the crew, mowing down many of the less important ones. A few of the crew try to use handy redshirts as shields, only to have those same redshirts, who by chance are all gnomes as well, pull blades from various hiding spots and slit the crewmembers throat. Just as the paratroopers begin to touch down a cadre of gnome spellcasters teleports onto the deck and quickly sets to neutralizing the magically adept crewmembers. The carnage lasts only a few moments before resistance on the deck has been eliminated and the gnomes split into squadrons to head below deck.

---

Several hours after the initial attack, the gnomes are once again gathered on the deck, but this time they are not alone. All that remains of the crew is gathered there (with the exception of one), shackled and bound. A blade wielding gnome stands behind each of them, ready to slit their throats. Dozens of mages keep a watchful eye on the group and countless snipers have their sights fixed upon the prisoners from every angle.

Terra: (struggling against the enchanted cuffs that restrain her) Let us go!

Gnome: (smacking her with the pommel of his sword) Quiet you!

Lisa: Calm down, you're not doing anyone any good.

Terra: I know, but I can't stand doing nothing. I want to know who these guys are. They took us down like it was nothing.

Kithle: (his head trapped in a metal contraption which cancels his mental power) Indeed. They knew the layout of the entire ship exactly, better than most of us I'd wager. Not to mention they knew our strengths, our weaknesses, our schedules, and our habits precisely. I don't know who these troops are but all this stinks of an inside job.

Voice: Very perceptive Kithle. I expected nothing less.

A figure steps out of the shadows, one who is infinitely familiar to all the crew members.

Terra: Pholly?! You're behind this?!

Pholly: Yes, yes I am. Although my true name is Bondjamesbond, elite secret agent of the Trust. I was sent to infiltrate this vessel early in its life when it first began to present itself as a threat to nations of Khorvair with the ultimate aim of bringing it down. I've been in deep cover for several years now, learning every facet of you people, preparing for the day, today, when you are finally brought to justice. In our final preparations for you downfall we were forced to infiltrate our agents into the ranks of your redshirts, and dangerous task which cost the lives of many a fine agent but their deaths have not been in vain for now I am here to pass the judgment of the Trust on you all.

Voice: Nice monologue, but this ends here half-pint.

All look up to see Satnak emerging from the bowls of the ship, carrying the bodies of several dead gnomes.

Satnak: Now just leave now and I might let a few of you live.

Pholly: (smirking) Ah, the deicide has finally decided to join us.

Satnak: That's right. And you should know there's no way you can stop me.

Pholly: Of course not. I knew from the beginning that no force at my disposal could bring you down, which is why I had an alternate plan. (gestures to where several gnomes hold Serene)

Satnak: SERENE! If you harm her I swear-

Pholly: (smirks) Oh I have no intention of harming her. Activate the device.

A robed gnome nods and pulls the switch on an odd device. As he does a portal opens behind Serene.

Pholly: This is portal is to a rather interesting dimension our mages discovered. A portal can only be opened to it once a millennia when the stars are right and beyond that time it is impossible to enter or leave by any mean.

Pholly smiles and snaps his fingers. The guards immediately hurl the bound Serene through the portal.

Pholly: This portal will last only a few more seconds now, time enough for you to follow your precious Serene. However, after that it will close, permanently. Chose now. Attack and spend the rest of your days separated from Serene or abandon the ship. You'd best chose quickly, there are only moments left.

Satnak: You're lying.

Pholly: Perhaps, but can you really take that risk? Tick-tock now.

Satnak appears torn, glancing from the crew, to Pholly, to the portal. Finally she casts a forlorn look at the crew before bounding through the portal just before it snaps shut.

Pholly: And so dies your last hope. Now you will face your judgment for your crimes.

Rose: (muttering to himself) There's still Jarlot out there at least...

Pholly: (smiling and glancing at rose) Oh and if you think you still have a hope in that failure of a captain of yours, you're wrong.

He tosses a sack onto the deck, out of which rolls Jarlot's severed head.

Pholly: It looks like those "epic levels" weren't worth much after all. Now let the trial begin!

---

Pholly: "Captain" Rose, you are charged with leading this band of miscreants in their crusades of larceny, killing, and wonton destruction. How do you plead?

Rose: If I say guilty, do I get to live?

Pholly: No, but your death will be quicker.

At that a gnome unceremoniously slits Rose's throat and watches as he falls to the floor. Dead.

---

Pholly: Terra and Lisa, you are charged with crimes against nature, illicit drug trafficking, and propaganda against the Silver Flame. How do you plead?

Terra: Where are Elina and Sarah, you bastard!

Pholly: Ah, the children. They have been taken into the custody of the Trust. Their "reeducation" has already commenced and they will soon be faithful servant of Zilargo.

Lisa: You monster!

Pholly: I sentence you, Terra, to the gallows. Lisa shall be returned to Flamekeep with all three Jeala's to be cleansed of this ship's brainwashing by a council headed but the esteemed Cardinal Krozen.

Terra is dragged onto a scaffold where her head is placed upon the gallows. She manages to glance one more time at Lisa before the blade descends.

Lisa: (in tears) TERRA!

Pholly: (dismissive) Take her away.

---

Pholly: Naz'roth, Sa'vor, and Tara. You are charged with the crime of being supernatural beings of evil persuasion bent on conquest of this plane. How do you plead?

Sa'vor: Where is Slip, what have you done with her?

Naz'roth: Yes, and how did you defeat our armies.

Pholly: Simply, my mages collapsed your personal plane upon itself, erasing all within from existence. It was confirmed before they did that Slip was inside at the time.

Sa'vor: You'll pay for this.

Pholly: Actually I don't think I will. For your crimes you will each be bound within the depths of Kyber for all eternity.

Several mages arrayed in a circle around the accused begin to chant. A magical circle forms beneath their feet and the accused bodies slowly dissolve into nothingness.

---

Pholly: And now for my favorite and final. Kithle, you are charged with attempting to create an illithid empire, the attempted murder of an agent of the Trust, and willful acts of a magnificent bastard. Kanatash and Volrath, you are charged with plotting to bring an end to reality as we know it and being the spawn of Xoriat. How do you plead?

Kithle: You know this explains why I was never able to kill you despite my best efforts. I know your going to kill me no matter what I say so I just wanted to say how good it feels right now remembering all the suffering I caused you.

Pholly: And for your crimes you will suffer. I sentence that you will be stripped of your title and put to death through the repeated recitations of Devon's poetry.

Kithle: (as a pair of gnome haul him off) IT WAS WORTH IT!

Pholly: Hm. Perhaps you believe so now but we shall see. Now, Kanatash and Volrath, your plea?

Kanatash: You can't do this to us! I am an entity after all!

Pholly: Oh but we can. We have used the same technology YOU developed to bring low ALL the entities. They will banned from our existence for their acts, never to return.

Volrath: This really looks like its the end, doesn't it Uncle?

Kanatash: Yes, it does. I have nothing left, no secret escapes, no back up plans, nothing.

Pholly: Volrath, I sentence you to death by disintegration.

Volrath is lead onto a scaffold surrounded by a dozen mages.

Pholly: Any last words?

Volrath: (looking at Kanatash) Goodbye Uncle, I guess.

Kanatash: Yes, I suppose fate this would be fate then. Face it with dignity.

Volrath barely has time to nod before he is struck by a dozen disintegrate spells, leaving nothing, not even dust. Kanatash stares at where Volrath once stood for a long moment and a single tear can be seen running down his face.

Pholly: Have you made your peace then Kanatash? (Kanatash nods) Then I sentance you to death through madness deprivation. You will be sealed within a room completely devoid of the madness energy upon which you exist and left until you finally succumb.

Kanatash: Do what you will to me. Just remember, someday I will meet you in Doruth and then I will see that all debts are paid.

Pholly: Until that day comes then. (nods)

Kanatash is hauled away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~










Kanatash: (drinking a cup of coffee) ...and that’s where the dream ends. What do you think it means?

Caralot: :blink:
Kaizer_Ryu

09-18-06, 09:37 PM		OOC: I knew it had to be a dream once Jarlot was dead. That's just impossible. :P
urial angel of death

09-18-06, 10:27 PM		OOC: Not to mention that Volrath's one method of death is not disintegration. Then again he would have also finished his transformation if Terra died. Finally knowing Satnak she could destroy all the gnome and jump in the portal in time. Other than that it fits completely.
Crystalforged

09-18-06, 10:39 PM		What would Volrath's one method of death be then? I honestly didn't even know there was ONLY one way.

Plus it's debatable whether Satnak could have killed him in time. He is Bondjamesbond remember. Not to mention, considering the number of times people have tried to kill him and all the other life threatening situations he's survived almost unscathed. Personally I'd give him pretty good odds of surviving the 5 or 6 seconds he'd have to last for the portal to close.

Also I'd just like to mention you're taking this way to seriously. After all, it was just a dream. From an insane crime agains nature who isn't supposed to be able to dream...
Kaizer_Ryu

09-18-06, 10:53 PM		What would Volrath's one method of death be then?
OOKaizer: :D I KNOW! I KNOW! :D

OOUrial: We can always go back to the 3rd ed Giants...

OOKaizer: :eek: Shutting up.

After all, it was just a dream. From an insane crime agains nature who isn't supposed to be able to dream...
Thus expaining the part that assumed Terra could be killed by beheading. :P

:blink: Wait...did I just type that? No! Bad hands! Stop typing about things I don't want them to know yet! *bite*

Please disregard the previous comments. They meant nothing. :shifty: Nothing at all...
Charles Phipps

09-18-06, 11:16 PM		Rose: The only way to kill Volrath and Terra BOTH is getting Elina and Sarah to sing this song!

*Elina and Sarah in Japanese Idol costumes*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AwNyh3m4_Bg
luna18moon

09-19-06, 12:04 AM		And to that I say:
Slaypaw was in humanoid form when captured, AND
OOluna: What about me?
Slaypaw slips out of her manacles while OOluna crushes the gnomes with a lunchbox.
OOluna: Take THAT, you utterly useless race! Take THAT! :devil: *turns to Pholly* You betrayed this ship and sent away Satnak?:ahem: For that you shall not die, but be eternally condemned to the Crystal dimenson :evillaugh . But first, to make this work...
She frees Kasei.
OOluna: All right Kasei, you know what to do.
Kasei: Bnshtrtrtcrystldmnsn! Rtrndcd!
At once, Pholly vanishes and Satnak and Serene reappear.
Satnak: Hmm? Slaypaw, who are these two?
Slaypaw shifts to humanoid form.
Slaypaw: Satnak, these are OOluna and Kasei. Kasei brought you back here, and OOluna is our entity.
Satnak: You and Kasei's?
Slaypaw: Correct.
Satnak: So you're the one responsible for my grandkittens. I don't know whether to zorch you or hug you.
OOluna: I prefer the second option.
OOC: I had to do that :D. Dang good story, though. And yes, I know it was a dream.
Phantomcrossing

09-19-06, 12:06 AM		Norbaz stands near the sink, with yellow gloves on, scrubbing the dishes furiously.

Norbaz: Crazy lady bustin' into my kitchen and ordering my around. I've studied under the best of Sharn. Grrr.....

Dastrix: I heard that!

Norbaz: Sigh, at least I'm not still locked up in Andrea's.
rampant

09-19-06, 12:48 AM		OOC: Actually Since illis was here Satnak's re-supplied on time regrssion powerstones. So gnomes get no element of surprise. Also I don't think anyone has told Satnak about the Grandkittens. Finally a hug from satnak (assuming your not either a - Serene, or b-super tough) is about the same as a zorch pain wise if not death wise.
Charles Phipps

09-19-06, 01:39 AM		OOCharles: Well I'm pleased that at least I stopped the Excel Saga jokes.

Sarah: How dare you live in a place with a roof, you user of ink!

OOCharles: OH CRAP! THE INFECTION HAS SPREAD TO MY WORLD!

Sarah: There is one Earth! If it splits in half, there'll be two! All mankind is scum - and bee-yoo-tiful!

OOCharles: How do we stop this!?

Michael: Oh Elina, I'm so glad that you've grown up. Now I can at last make sweet sweet love to you!

Elina: Are you the next store neighbor?

*belches blood on him*

Sarah: There can be no excuse for those who use animation to exploit innocent children. That pisses Sarah off! You've all been bad boys, so in the name of the toons, Sarah will punish you

OOCharles: What are you going to do?

Sarah: Stab Elina from behind so her lover Lilly can hold her as she dies in water!

Aerith: HEY! No stealing my bit!

Sarah: I wanted that part, but it was dubbed in Canada!

Aerith: In any case, I will set things right. So long as Sarah isn't fully corrupted, the process can be reversed.

Sarah: Sarah just wishes that she had a DVD player instead of a coffee can filled with gravel. Hey, Terrapalazzo, just who does a girl have to sell her unmentionables to to get some personal electronics around here?

Aerith: S***.

Elina: *dies*

Michael: NOOooooooooooooooooooo! ELINA MY LOVE!

Lilly: YOU PERVERTED BASTARD!

Sarah: Ha-chan, if you continue to so cavalierly play with the definition of death, they're gonna dissect you for real one of these days!

Lilly: SHE WAS MINE!

*Lilly tackles Michael through the wall*

Elina: *grabs hold on Quench and absorbs its life force* mmmmmm experience levels. I feel much better.

*Quenchy twitches horribly*

OOCharles: About me...

Sarah: [singing] Obliterate! Eliminate! Lord Terrapalazo told me so! Genocide! Manga artist-cide! And an order of homicide to go!

Good Sarah: NO SARAH! YOU MUSN'T KILL HIM!

Bad Sarah: YES! KILL HIM!

*Good Sarah whips out a pistol and shoots Bad Sarahl with it*

Good Sarah: The bullet of justice caps evil's ass! Remember that!

Sarah: Justice plays dirty!

Good Sarah: Well right makes might y'know!

OOCharles: What the hell am I going to do?

Arijani: HAHA! You foolish little man, you didn't suspect that all along this was my SCHEME FOR REVENGE.

OOCharles: Yes, because we killed you in the arc a long time ago.

Arijani: Well TOO BAD! NOW I HAVE KIDNAPPED AERITH AND WILL RULE ALL CREATION!

Aerith: I was dead too you know.

Arijanji: Deaths in RPGs never last! Besides, Solar Devas are immortal anyway.

Rose: *jumps in with Afro-Ishmael II, Afro-Ishmael III, and SHOCKINGLY AFRO-ISHMAEL I* The Power of Fro Compells you!

Arinaji: NO! ITS NOT POSSIBLE!

*huge parody of sailor moon final before they all add their afros together and hit Arijani with it, blowing him away*

OOCharles: Wow, I'm glad that's over with.

Rose: Sadly not, my son from the future has just returned from Bard school after kicking Michael's ass.

*Lilly now bare chested and pretty boy has a guitar strapped around his front*

Terrapalazzo: Are you the messenger from HQ? Why are you late? Let us hear your reasons for that first.

Lilly: My name is Lilly. I am a Lilly.

[to Sarah]

Lilly: And could you perhaps be... my flower pot?

Sarah: [shouts] Sarah heat overload! Sarah isn't used to such lovie-dovie attacks but what about her Terrapalazzo? Sarah's so confused.

Terrapalazzo: [internally towards Lilly] Damn you. Just because you're a visually appealing little bastard doesn't make you cool. You're stupid! Stupid! Stupid! I'll kill you, you poser! I'll definitely make you die! Mom said I didn't have enough talent to be a bard.

Gaia: It was 2nd Edition! You didn't have a high enough charisma score.

Terrapalazo: I DID TOO!

Rose: One of these days we have to figure out which one of the girls is dating Lilly.

OOCharles: What we need is a bunch of robots to fix this mess.

Ketler: *swings in wearing a thick labcoat and holding 12 year old Jaela again* HEY KIDSSSSSSS! ITS DOCTOR KOZO KETLER!

OOCharles: Oh hell! Shioji got adapted! Everyone hates him!

Ketler: *coughs* I just want you to know that I find this entire implication that I am interested in young girls disgusting and I'm contacting my agent *cough* SOoooo who wants some candy little girls!?

Sarah: Me! Me!

Andrea: Can I have some?

Ketler: Sorry babe, but big boobs and a nice butt really turn me off.

*gives candy to Sarah and the once more dead Elina*

Jaelamatsu: I am Jaelamatsu.

Jaelamatsu 2: and I'm Jaelamatsu too!

OOCharles: FINE! I give my permission to turn Serial Experiment Sarah Saga into a Fantasy Pirate Show!

*STAMP*

OOCharles: NOW SHOW ME THE MONEY!
cypher_zero

09-19-06, 01:46 AM		OOC: I am completely confused. Perhaps because I know nothing if this so called "Excel Saga." Not really sure I want to now...
.
rampant

09-19-06, 01:58 AM		OORampant - :twitch:*snap*HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE
*SUPER SCOPE RAMPAGE IN MEWTWO COSTUME SUPER MEGA FINAL ATTACK*

Rose - The inhumanity!

Ketler - The vaporized limbs!

Andrea - The spare parts!

-----------------------------

Later after much twitching and sedatives.

OORampant - Ok...breathe.....1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10... .

OORampant snips the timeline removing OOCharles's last post not only from cannon but from time itself, neatly sealing the edges around the cut ends.
Crystalforged

09-19-06, 01:59 AM		Oh, on the whole "Excel Saga" I just wanted to say, ahem...

"English Mother****er! Do you speak it!?" :P



Don't worry, I'm just joking but I seriously in the same boat as Cypher here. I don't really mind but I'm not understanding a word of whats going on there. The only thing I've gotten out of those posts is that Excel Saga is really, really wierd.
Charles Phipps

09-19-06, 02:07 AM		OOC:
I just liberally quoted about a dozen jokes completely out of their context.

Excel Saga's premise in the manga and loosely the series is that its about two henchgirls that are working for what seems to be an organization bent on taking over the world (the manga is pretty explicit that the leader of the organization is crazy and there's only the two henchgirls).

The series follows parodies of every anime genre whatsoever and is filled with random and bizarre gags that either mesmerise or repulse. So if you have some extra cash. BUY MY SCIENCE FICTION NOVELS If you have A LOT of extra cash, try the DVDs out.

Opening: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sqPTVpG64OI
Demo Episode: (Japanese) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gq76K90vNEU&mode=related&search=
cypher_zero

09-19-06, 02:41 AM		OOC: That wasn't a plug at all... Oh, and I did. Just haven't arrived yet.
.
Charles Phipps

09-19-06, 02:45 AM		OOC: There's no subliminal hypnosis in my posts

buymybooksbuymybooksbuymybooks

(Thanks btw).

So of course it wasn't a plug. I heartily recommend Excel.

Yourdogisafoodsource

BTW, if any of you have a high tolerance for language and have seen the movie Full Metal Jacket. Here's a Japanese English instruction segment. It will destroy your brain worse than Excel.

http://maritan.ytmnd.com/
cypher_zero

09-19-06, 02:55 AM		OOC: *rubbing head* Ow... Never link to something like that again... I think a part of me just died.
.
Charles Phipps

09-19-06, 02:57 AM		The FF is invading the real world ;-)
rampant

09-19-06, 03:03 AM		Kithle - and no one invited me?:weep:
Crystalforged

09-19-06, 03:05 AM		I reiterate my original statement. That was really, really bizzare. I kind of liked it though. And that frightens me. I need to cry myself to sleep now in terror of the creature I am becoming.



Oh and about the FF invading the real world? Since when has that been news. Kanatash has been sharing space in my cranium for a good six months now.
cypher_zero

09-19-06, 03:14 AM		OOC: Sure, but he's still in your head for the most part and you can contain him, or at least limit him. Imagine if we let some of the other crew run around loose. *shudder* I'd hate to see what would happen if Caralot got loose. *shudder*
.
Paulon

09-19-06, 03:50 AM		OOC: Overall, on a world scale I doubt most of the FF crew could do anything to make the earth any worse than the people here manage for themselves. Aside from Satnak who's capable of kicking moons about and wiping out cities with a punch. On a personal level, from where I'm standing, at a nice safe distance, it'd probably be fun to watch them. :-)
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-19-06, 07:39 AM		OOC: Let's not drag any real-world stuff into this. This is a cathartic place for me.
IC: 2??. There shall be no more Excel Saga references.
2??. This is the Forgotten Freedom, we do that stuff on a regular basis, but in context.
2??. Kanatash's dreams are not allowed to become reality.
2??. Elina and Sarah are off limits.

13: I think that covers everything.

Silver: The wedding's never going to happen at this rate, is it?

13: I hope it does. If you'd seen the sort of people Caralot's invited, you do not want them running around the FF.

Bunny: Worse than hippies?

13: I never thought hippies were that bad, so it's relative.

Bunny: Anyway the ship needs a plotline.

OOcat: But our usual "Oh, look over there, it's a [blank]" and then we run and hide and comment while everyone else beats the crp out of it.

Bunny: We might as well stick with anime. I vote giant mecha.

13: We can work in an Eberron reference if we use the Godforged.

OOcat: Yeah, we've pretty much dumped Eberron around here. I'm starting to think we should move to Satnak's Eberron so we can have a new place to torment.
urial angel of death

09-19-06, 08:58 AM		Rose: The only way to kill Volrath and Terra BOTH is getting Elina and Sarah to sing this song!

*Elina and Sarah in Japanese Idol costumes*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AwNyh3m4_Bg

okay there are two ways
Gladius_Lucix

09-19-06, 09:24 AM		Liam staggers out of his lab.

Liam: No food, no water, no sleep, working for a week straight. Must eat.

Supported by the Duct Tape Swarm, Liam staggers toward the galley.

Duct Tape Swarm: :nonono: You need to remember to eat, boss. Either that, or invest in a ring of sustenance.

Liam: But it's done! The safety measures are in place, and everything's working properly. Once I get some food and sleep, I'll show everyone what I've been doin... ZZZZZZZ.

The Duct Tape Swarm sighs, and drags Liam to the galley so he can get some food when he wakes up.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-19-06, 10:32 AM		OOC:
I just liberally quoted about a dozen jokes completely out of their context. And I was laughing the whole time. :thumbsup:

So if you have some extra cash. BUY MY SCIENCE FICTION NOVELS If you have A LOT of extra cash, try the DVDs out.Even though I'm poor, I have done both, so there's NO EXCUSE for not buying his novels! Or the DVD's. ;)

And as far as Terra being killed...it's a rather unique case. Let's just say she's still pretty much going to try and avoid anything that would "kill" her beyond ressurection like the plague and leave it at that. I'll elaborate on this if and when the opportunity arrives. :P
rwarner3701

09-19-06, 11:24 AM		Jarlot stumbles into Erk’s Place not nearly as drunk as he would like to be and spots Rose sitting at a table in the corner. Walking over he drops down into a seat and looks up to Erk at the bar.

Jarlot: A quadruple scotch for me and… (turning to Rose) what are you having?

Rose: He knows what I’m drinking.

Erk: Another Shirley Temple.

Jarlot: Better go easy might have something important to do later tonight.

Rose: :ahem: What are you doing back here anyway?

Jarlot: I came back with the FF2 after their raid.

Rose: Why?

Jarlot: Its great… (pulls out letter from publishers clearing house) I can win 1,000,000 gold.

Rose: That’s it? You already had all the crews money and that huge resort island ready to open would make you a ton more.

Jarlot: …well yeah

Rose: And the prophecy I thought you were trying to avoid that.

Jarlot: I was… but this is important.

Rose: Why?

Jarlot: Well… it’s just that… I’ve never won anything before :weep:

Rose: …

Jarlot: That reminds me. How would you like to receive some fine monthly publications in the mail? We have Better Ships and Skyways, and People.

Rose: Will it make you leave me alone.

Jarlot: Almost defiantly.

Rose: Fine.

Rose fills out the sign up sheet and hands Jarlot some gold. Jarlot downs his drink quickly and stumbles back out into the ship.
rampant

09-19-06, 03:36 PM		Levy - hehe...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA that one's got a back bone on her after all.

Kratwe - Am I the only one who's concerned here. The Satnak I know wouldn't have waited for an explaination. Whats wrong whith her?

Levy - She's gone and grown up kid. *sigh* She's too strong to go off half-cocked anymore and she knows it. Her power rivals mine now and you know she's smarter than me, she hides it pretty well though. I think that Serene girl is helping.

Kratwe - I still don't see why she chooses to live here, and mate a weakling to boot.

Illis - These people maybe weak, but they were there when she was beyond our aid. We owe her continued well being to their hospitality.

Tendra - Mayhap she envies the frail seeming Serene.

Kratwe - NO way I'd have said something. I saw what keeping that kind of thing back did to Satnak. I just think that Serene is a spoony bard who will keep Satnak from producing an heir.

Forbes - Another reason to live here, ask the students on board about their parentage. I belive this is them now. Hello girls that trick wont work on me you've miscalculated the weight on that net and it wont get enough air time to unfurl. Good try though.

Sarah - Awww I wanted snakeskin boots.

Elina - I told you we should have used a pit trap.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-19-06, 06:06 PM		Kratwe - …I just think that Serene is a spoony bard who will keep Satnak from producing an heir.

Forbes - Another reason to live here, ask the students on board about their parentage.
Silver: Hello, resident fertility goddess. We've got a variety of fem/fem packages: tentacles, mind powers, artificial womb, you name it. Here's my card. You can talk to Caralot if you have any doubts. We always aim to "please". :D
********
Jarlot: That reminds me. How would you like to receive some fine monthly publications in the mail? We have Better Ships and Skyways, and People.

Rose: Will it make you leave me alone.

Jarlot: Almost defiantly.

Rose: Fine.

Rose fills out the sign up sheet and hands Jarlot some gold.
13: *sigh* Igor! Better upgrade the mail room, we're going to have a junk barrage.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-19-06, 06:10 PM		13: *sigh* Igor! Better upgrade the mail room, we're going to have a junk barrage.

Ash "Junkmail? you mean post-tinder? :devil: Its taken care of. :mage: "
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-19-06, 06:15 PM		OOC: *rubbing head* Ow... Never link to something like that again... I think a part of me just died.
OOC: I still don't get it: I get worse stuff than that from people who speak actual English all the time. Generally means they're mummbling. I could make all that out completely clear.

So, is it just me or did I enter this world from the other side of insane? :D
Charles Phipps

09-19-06, 06:17 PM		Ten Years Later
Eberron in the Forgotten Freedom-verse

Breland: Sharn has been rebuilt multiple times with the city actually now resembling Sigil from Planescape due to the weird visitors from other dimensions, odd cults, and near-Apocalyptical events that has occurred here. Satnak has started to be worshipped with aspects of Terra into the Lady of Knives.

Boranal has been dead for some time at this point with the current rulers of the Kingdom being King Steve, Boranal's illegitimate psychopath of a son that spent a year with Kanatash as his psycho-therapist. King Steve has caused the Last War to resume numerous times even as he forgets to continue it. His sane daughter Princess Sarah is most likely another of Jarlot's illegitimate children and currently wishing/praying for him to die.

The FF has saved Steve on several occasions because Sarah is competent enough to catch them.

Aundair: Still ruled by Queen Aurala, the clones of her make it practically impossible to kill her even as she's taken up magic to guarantee her reign for as long as possible. At this point, it's only a matter of time before she becomes a Lich-Queen as well as hateful enemy of the country.

The country is now dominated by her bizarre whims and more or less becoming Oz at this point.

Thrane: Currently prospering under the Pontiff's rule with Queen Diana serving as secular regent with the insanity of Cardinal Kronzen (now in exile/asylum at a monastary for treatment of his nightmares/catatonia). The land has lost much of its military force in armed combat with the FF.

The number of Demon Attacks has also practically ceased with the defeat of Sutekh the Demon in the Flame.

Karrnath: Remarkably unchanged despite numerous attempts by Vampire Hunter Rose to eliminate the reigning Vampire Monarch of the land.

Mournlands and Valenar: Somewhat larger at this point, the Lord of Blade's insanity and defeat lead most of the remaining warforged to join with Prince Oargev in making a military coup against the Valenar with the death of their current prince. The land is now uneasily occupied by the two powers with the country split down in half.

New Cyre is mostly abandoned with its populous having immigrated away from Steve's lunacy (he attempted to drill for Mana in the Mournlands)

The Demon Wastes: Now currently expanding with settlers due to the defeat of Arijani, the Lords of Dust and demon's power in the region is broken. The land is starting to flourish much like Dark Sun post the Prism Pentad. It's a much less interesting place and now nicknamed "Flowerland."

Sarlona: Devastated by the destruction of hundreds of Inspired's Quori and the wounding of the Dreaming Dark plus Satnak blasting the capital city to pieces, the country of Reidra is currently in turmoil. The useless hippie Kalashatar are doing nothing while the Jedi....err I mean soul knives are mostly talking about the Dark Side.

Xoriat: The brief jaunt into the realm by the Forgotten Freedom didn't do much other than kill one of the Overlords of the land but has made it clear that the planet of Eberron will not be taken over lightly by even their remarkable power.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-19-06, 06:19 PM		Ash "Junkmail? you mean post-tinder? :devil: Its taken care of. :mage: "
13: Has to get here before you can burn it. Unless you want to sign up for a job in the mail room. Your test: to be left alone in a room with piles and piles of easily flammable letters, and not burn a single one.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-19-06, 06:31 PM		Xoriat: The brief jaunt into the realm by the Forgotten Freedom didn't do much other than kill one of the Overlords of the land but has made it clear that the planet of Eberron will not be taken over lightly by even their remarkable power.
OOC: In Caralot's Eberron they became telemarketers, reality TV producers, pop-culture creators, etc. Took over the world much faster that way.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-19-06, 06:31 PM		13: Has to get here before you can burn it. Unless you want to sign up for a job in the mail room. Your test: to be left alone in a room with piles and piles of easily flammable letters, and not burn a single one.

Ash "I have self controll. I was hiding here for years before any one was notised and in taht time nothing Exploded."

Pholly "Ahem."

Ash "That can be atributed directy to me."

(OOC: Charles, is my spelling that bad or do you not reply to PMs for some reason? Im sorry about the first one I sent being rather incoherent, I was chasing the coffe been as I typed. The second one I'm kina hoping for a responce on. Sorry if this comes off nagging, but even a 'stop PMing me' would be nice )
Charles Phipps

09-19-06, 06:37 PM		OOC: No, it's just your PM is one that requires a lot of thought in the reply and its going to be a bit before I finish writing it.

My computer is busted and my replies were at the library.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

09-19-06, 06:40 PM		( whoa, I had no idea, thanks in advance then)
urial angel of death

09-19-06, 08:08 PM		Klaz lies on the floor of the lowwer decks an enormous wound gaping in his chest.

Klaz: Thank gods I got away from the stringray. *looks around* Am I dead?

Volrath and Nalfien come upon him.

Volrath: Nalfien look who it is.

Klaz: *sees them* I must be in hell!

Nalfien: Woah sucks to be you.

Klaz: *passes out*

Volrath: Pinky, are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Nalfien: Yes but where will we find that much cheese?

Volrath: Not that! :mad: The other thing.

Nalfien: Oh, :embarrass Then I'll get Andrea and Ketler.

Volrath: I'll get Igor and Caralot.
---------

The mage are assembled in Volrath's lab. Klaz is on an examination table.

Volrath:Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology. We have the capability to build the world's first bionic man.

Ketler: What about renegade mastermakers?

Volrath: Shut up, Klaz will be that man. Better than he was before. Better, stronger, faster.
rampant

09-19-06, 08:22 PM		Kithle - So he might make average?:D

Klaz - Oh no.

Kithle - I say we do a Zexion on this guy. I wanna see what an oreo man's brain tastes like.

----------------------
OOC: Read the char bio for Zexion in Ansem retort
http://www.analogpaladins.com/index.php
--------------------------------
Gladius_Lucix

09-19-06, 08:56 PM		The Duct Tape Swarm drags Liam into Erk's Place, figuring it's probably safer for an unconcious person than the birthplace of the Chili.

Duct Tape Swarm: Hey, Erk, Liam's been working for seven days straight, with no food, water, or sleep. Got anything for that?

Erk hands a tube and funnel to the Duct Tape Swarm, and grabs a bottle of something, pops it open, and passes it over. The Swarm (I REALLY need a name for him) stuffs the tube down Liam's throat, sticks in the funnel, and dumps down the contents of the bottle. Once it all goes down, the Swarm pulls out the tube, and Liam sits up, choking.

Liam: What the :censored: was that?

Duct Tape Swarm: Just a little something to keep you from dieing. Now, let's get some food in you. NJ, could you bring Liam a bowl of chicken soup?

Ninja Jaela looks at the talking rolls of duct tape and blinks once.

NJ26: Coming right up. You want anything?

Duct Tape Swarm: No mouth, no stomach. Thanks, anyway.
luna18moon

09-19-06, 09:18 PM		OOC: :pbbbtt: I was having fun. All right, I'll answer your questions(points, whatever).
1. I'd rather die than float around in nothingness with the other entities Satnak's zorched
2. She's gonna know eventually. Plus, by this time you can kinda tell Slaypaw's pregnant, and she barely ever is seen without Fluffy. Probably easy to guess.
3. When did it become reality? I was adding my :twocents: about the dream.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-19-06, 09:49 PM		(I REALLY need a name for him)
OOC: Ducky.
IC: The Duct Tape Swarm now notices that everyone in Erk's Place is still wearing superhero costumes.

DTS: Uh—

Just then some megalomaniac comes through the door in an armored suit with 20 henchmen.

Megalomaniac: Ha! This interdimensional space is now mine! I shall use it in my grand scheme to become ruler of all reality [standard villain rant]

Erk (wearing his Word Being brown cloak with the big collar that stands up and a costume that looks like it came off a Lucha Libre wrestler): All right, who ordered an armored megalomaniac?

Several hands go up.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-19-06, 10:22 PM		OOC: Whatever happened to the poka-dotted duck that called Liam Mommy and the foul mouthed orange and green striped dog? Those were hilarious.

And the following is a sorely-needed-yet-ignored addendum to the Rules. Feel free to add on.

THINGS THAT NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO DO IF BUNNY SUGGESTS IT

1. Hit on Serene while Satnak is around

2. Hit on Serene period if you are not Satnak

3. Hit on Satnak

4. Hit on Lisa while Terra is around and visa-versa

5. Same for when they aren't

6. Hit on Elina or Sarah whle their parents are around

7. Same goes for when they aren't around

8. Attempt to seduce/entice/charm Sarah and/or Elina in any way, shape, or form

9. Make Nalfein angry if you are Non-Uber

10. Speak to Nalfein for pointless reasons if you are Non-Uber

11. Be near Nalfein when he hasn't torched anything in more than 10 minutes

12. 2 minutes if he hasn't had his coffee yet

13. Do any activity that needs to be proceeded by the statement: "Hey, check this out..."



Dang, I had more than that, but now I'm drawing a complete blank. Stupid writers block...
rampant

09-19-06, 10:56 PM		14. Hitting on Tendra or Illis (yes we are all looking at you Doog)

15. Even Looking at Gisen Wierd.

16. Tirmek can handle you lot himself.

17. Hitting on Satnak's friends might actually work.

18. Warning whatever gender you think Disarray is, E isn't.

19. Where did Rixle go?
----------------------------

Rixle - What a sweet couple, how's about a 3way?

Rose - :eek:

Zella - Only if I get to watch you two first.

Rose - :OMG!
Gladius_Lucix

09-19-06, 11:06 PM		OOC: Whatever happened to the poka-dotted duck that called Liam Mommy and the foul mouthed orange and green striped dog? Those were hilarious.

They were abandoned in Caralot's Eberron. Wasn't really planning on them staying around, but it could be amusing. Maybe when Liam's newest gadget malfunctions.
rwarner3701

09-19-06, 11:26 PM		OOC: It seems we all almost missed International Talk Like a Pirate Day. Apoligies in advance to Cypher and Eled if it bothers you, but these two are the funniest people I could think to use for it.

Ash: Ahoy Terrek! We be missin' one o' the most greatest days to be a gentleman o fortune.

Terrek: By the Powers! You be right.

Ash: Aye, we best be bein' careful to ne'er miss it again.

Terrek: Arr, me hearty, we we best spread the word quickly or the cap'n be comin' after all o' us wi' a vengence.

Ash: Aye, me parrot concurs, you be goin' aft and I'll be goin' fore to spread the word.
Gladius_Lucix

09-19-06, 11:31 PM		There's a reason we missed it.


418. As pirate, we find talking like a pirate day to be unnecessary.
cypher_zero

09-19-06, 11:58 PM		OOC: That was rather amusing, but unnecessary nonetheless. And Terrek isn't a pirate. Actually, most of the crew aren't pirates now that I think about it. Anyone else notice that this thread reads more like a comic book than anything else? I mean really. Pick up a copy of like X-men and you'll see what I mean. A bunch of super-powerful people that mostly sit around and talk about stuff and have really twisted and contorted love lives and every once in a while some big baddie comes along that gets them all to fight him for a bit. Which takes forever. Only difference I can see is that no one dies on the FF, they just come really close. OK, rant over.... For now *dun dun dun*
.
rampant

09-20-06, 12:34 AM		OOC: We almost managed to get rid of Aerith. We were this close. >-<

Aerith - BUt Satnak saved me? why does her E.B.N.E. hate me:confused: :weep:

OORampant - She was saving Brianna's soul so it could rest in peace. You just came along for the ride. Also I wouldn't advise letting Levy Know your a Deva, unless you want to know why she's The Dreadknaught of Heaven's Tears.
Gladius_Lucix

09-20-06, 12:53 AM		Liam finishes, the soup, and continues on to heartier fare: A bacon cheeseburger.

Liam: So, did you see those Weirsan reading?

Duck Tape Swarm: Yeah. Two about even with Satnak, and a bunch more a slight bit lower, all in the area of the Portal to Satnak's Eberron. Are you planning what I think you're planning?

Liam: If you think I'm planning on talking to Forbes and Levy about installing Weirsan Converters for the Island, then you're right.

Duct Tape Swarm: :nonono: How'd I guess.

Liam: You just know me that well. And how'd you manage that with neither head nor face?

Duct Tape Swarm: :nonono: Just don't ask.
rampant

09-20-06, 01:14 AM		Forbes - Actually the technical side Is my Responsibility primarily. Levy will want to see the plans herself, but You need to talk to me. She handles more of the actual hands on teaching.

LIam - EEP!

Forbes - (crooked serpent smile) I believe we have business to conduct. (places 3 platinum on the table) Keep the ffod and drink coming, tell me when that runs out. Now lets see these plans before we get to the haggling.
-----------------------------------

OOC: Liam is so in over his head:evillaugh
-------------------------------------

Levy - Kratwe, ask

Kratwe - :rolleyes: whats so special about your parents that has anything to do with Satnak maintaining a lineage?

Elina - Why does it matter to you?

Kratwe - I know the reason Satnak took so long to say anything to Levy was that she wanted children, and for that you need a male.

Sarah - Uh-uh Mom and Momma did just fine.

Kratwe - :confused:
Charles Phipps

09-20-06, 01:17 AM		OOC: Actually, plenty of the crew does in fact die. While Aerith is our Jean Grey in the death SEEMED to take for a bit, I actually tried to kill off the following characters permanently: Andrea, Marish, Jacob Hunter, Bruce Ki, V, and even Michael.

Our Steve Irwin analogue alas shall never be used again *removes hat*

Also, TERREK will star in this scene extensively!

IC:

Rose: What, is Pirating too good for you?

Terrek: Yes.

Rose: RIGHTttttt. That's why you hang around on a PIRATE ship.

Terrek: You don't even do any pirating!

Rose: Fine. Gimme your wallet.

Terrek: That's mugging! Not piracy!

Rose: How do you keep an idiot waiting?

Terrek: I'm not going to fall for that.

Rose: But yes, we do all the pirate stuff. We talk about parlay, we randomly destroy stuff, we look for buried treasure, we swordfight, we womanize, I swing from chandeliers. We have lots of undead. We drink a lot.

Terrek: How about robbing other ships?

Rose: What's that got to do with piracy?

Terrek: YOU MORON! THAT'S WHAT PIRACY IS!

Rose: Then how come they never do it in Pirates of the Carribean? Or Cutthroat Island? Or Muppet Treasure Island?!

Terrek: Oiye.

Rose: Right Kermit?

Kermit: Yessir.

Rose: In any case, Excel Sarah and I shall celebrate Talk Like a Pirate Day by in fact actually ROBBING A SHIP!

Excel Sarah: Hold on, just let me finishing killing OOCharles.

Great Will of the Macrocosm Aerith: Excel... Excel... thou must not kill the original comic book author.

*OOCharles is hung from the gallows*

Excel Sarah: I'm so sorry. I suppose it was wrong.

Rose: We need to rob something BIG in order to finally satisfy our pirating urges. I know, let's rob THAT OVER THERE!

*points to a city floating on some kind of meteorite*

Terrek: That's not a ship, that's the Comet Empire from Starblazers.

Rose: I'm sure it has plenty of loot!

Terrek: You're just going to end up saving the world again.

Rose: WE WILL NOT!

Terrek: In any case, I bet Zella is already imprisoned there.

***

Onboard the Comet Empire Asteroid

Generic Evil Prince faced Puchu: Now I have you in my clutches....PU-CHU!

Zella: *lies in some kind of coma chamber*

Generic Evil Prince faced Puchu: Now I could do something nasty to your sleeping form but I won't because this is a PG anime. Muhhahapuchupuchu!

*Captain jarlot is dressed like a Butler save with multi-colored hair*

Captain Jarlot: Very good sir.

Generic Evil Prince faced Puchu: Who would have thought that taking you into my confidence would have no chance of betrayal at all!

Puchu Pirates: PU-CHU!

***

Rose: Well is the entire crew assembled for this pirate raid?

Excel Sarah: They're all at Satnak's wedding which is finally happening but now off camera.

Rose: GOD DAMNIT! I was hoping that I'd see Serene naked.

Excel Sarah: Why would she be naked?

Rose: Don't people from Satnak's world marry naked?

Excel Sarah: That's Betazed.

Rose: Oh. No crew at all?

Excel Sarah: I have built this wooden underling-like puppet with an optional soy sauce puffy thingy.

Rose: I will make it a staff officer, and the thingy a unit captain. And you, Excel, are promoted to toilet cleaner.

Excel Sarah: I'm uncomfortable being outranked by inanimate objects when Excel Sarah is very animate.

*A group of Pu-chu with advanced superweapons sneak aboard the ship before they're hit by the spinning mast and all killed, one of the superweapons falls into Sarah's hands...looking much like a hair dryer*

Excel Sarah: It has been democratically decided by a vote of 99 brain cells to one that this is a super-weapon sent to me by the Across research centre to conquer the city with! Of course, it does say ‘Made in Mars' here, but I will unwisely ignore that.

Terrek: You people are morons.

Rose: Wait til you meet the rest of the crew.

*Rose affixes an afro, puts on a Lupin the Third Jacket, and picks up two AK-47s*

Terrek: Since when do AK-47s exist on Eberron!?

Rose: Since Modern D20 crossover rules were done by....OPEN SOURCE!

Lilly: *walks on handsomely and fluffs his hair* I'll...also help.

Sarah: :slobber: :love: :jaw drop:

***

*Terra watching Lilly from nearby*

Terra: Quit putting on such a show! Giving yourself an artist's airs, you narcissistic bastard! Nar-bastard, nar-bastard! Disappear! Leave! Go away, away

***

Ten Minutes later

Scenes of Unimaginable Carnage Edited to be replaced with Scenes of Kittens playing with String

*Sounds of horror and laser fire fill the air instead*

***

Rose: DON'T LEAVE ME SPACE BUTLER!

Captain Jarlot: *dying in Rose's arms* You moron.....It's me, Jarlot in disguise.

Rose: Oh.....then you still owe me fifty gold from our last poker game.

*flashback of Rose and Jarlot gambling in Vegas*

*Flashback of Rose and Jarlot urinating on King Boranal while he's drunk*

*Flashback of Terrek looking on as Rose holds Jarlot while he's dying*

Terrek: That's happening RIGHT NOW!

Jarlot: Rose....I am your father.

Rose: Really?

Jarlot: **** no! You think I'd admit to having a kid like you!

*drops Jarlot on the ground*

*Scenes of Excel Sarah chasing Pu-chus and gunning them down mercilessly in the background*

Rose: So I assume you finally have it proved to you that we're pirates?

Terrek: You just saved the world again! You didn't even loot the city as it's about to crash!

Rose: Other pirates save the world!

Terrek: Name one!

*Chorus of 'Captain Harlock' plays in the background*

Terrek: Name two.

Rose: ME!

Terrek: Oh for Pete's sake.
rampant

09-20-06, 02:32 AM		Klaz - I'm not dead yet!!!!

Kithle - Quiet oreo! Someone fetch me a glass of milk.
-----------------------------------------

Chalky - Gotcha!

Squishy - Oh Come on!! this wasn't funny the first time!
----------------------------------

OOC: Yeah Lets get this going already
-----------------------------------

Organ Music (gall bladder I think) is playing, if not for the unearthly tones and resonances it would be the wedding march as it is it sounds much nicer.
Charles Phipps

09-20-06, 04:22 AM		Ten Days of Whacky

Commodore Jarlot's Log, Forgotten Freedom II
Day 1 of the New Log

Both myself and Rose have determined that there isn't nearly enough pirating going on this vessel, so we've decided to start working on training the crew in a new regime that will help get them more involved in handling the rigors of piracy.

I expect to hear great things from this experiment. Our biggest problem is a certain redheaded paladin that I won't name names for. Instead, I shall refer to her by the pseudonym of "Bisa."

***

Captain Rose's Log, Forgotten Freedom I
Day 2 of the New Log

That moron Jarlot! Who does he think he is waltzing back into our lives like that? HE LEFT ME IN CHARGE! Everyone has already started calling me "First Mate" Rose and "Ryker" amongst other things. I mean, just because I look sort of like the villain from Gargoyles and have grown a beard doesn't mean....GGRRRR.

I will have to make sure that his plot goes ARRY!

In other news, we were attacked by feared Pirate Killers in a bunch of "Lost Boys" that we fully intended to slaughter along with their psychotic ageless elf leader Peter but apparently Lisa objected to this. The goody two shoes found them good homes and taught them etiquette.

***

Admiral Murphy Jarlot's Log, The REALLY Forgotten Freedom.
Day 3

I've decided to return to active duty to help my son and great nephew in their pirating. I also have decided to start taking a new medication that Terra has been passing around. It's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain!

I'm sure this won't affect my command.

I've started to refer to Rose as "Smee" as part of my preparing him for his job as first mate. He seems to object to my plan that we should subject all of the crew to buggery, the rum, and the lash. He seems to miss the point of piracy.

***
Commodore Jarlot's Log, Forgotten Freedom II
Day 4 of the New Log

"Talk like a Pirate Day" was initially not taken terribly serious. One of the chief problems was everyone was talking about the wedding between two crew member women. Damnit, MARRIAGE IS AN ABOMINATION! Does no one understand that it removes women off the market!

In any case, people started to get the message when we started random executions when people didn't add "Arrrrr" and "Pretty" to their every word. I've also had Andrea cast Cause Scurvy on most of the Redshirts.

We also picked up a Doctor and his insane sister Ocean today. They're apparently wanted by the Alliance of the Five Nations. We intended to turn them over to Jacob Hunter in order to collect a big fat reward but GUESS WHO objected.

***

Captain Rose's Log, Forgotten Freedom I
Day 5 of the New Log

Today we successfully robbed a lightning rail of all of its contents, booty, and treasure. UNFORTUNATELY, in a plot twist that ANY moron could have seen coming (except "Commodore" Jarlot) it proved to be medicine. So, a certain SOMEONE who happened to be a Paladin had to give it back to the miners. I've give you a hint, she's got red hair and has a name that rhymes with "Misa"

It also offended the person we were supposed to sell the medicine to (the Boranal crime syndicate lord "Nicksa"), so I kicked his Troll henchmen into the fire elemental ring. That's in no way going to come back and haunt us.

***

Admiral Murphy Jarlot's Log, The REALLY Forgotten Freedom.
Day 6

Having subsisted on stimutax for nearly full week without food, water, or sleep, I have started to gain supernatural powers. Marduk compells me to kill the crew members that disagree with my decisions. Terra assures me this is perfectly natural behavior.

I tried finding the Pro-shop today. That lead me to a confrontation with Shipman Edgars (he swore his name was "Ishmael" but I beat it into him). Lacking the ability to find it, I just torched a country club and robbed it. This sweet girl Lisa helped me when I explained to her that they were EVIL golfers.


***
Commodore Jarlot's Log, Forgotten Freedom II
Day 7

Another complication today when I got into a tussel with a guy named "Monkey D'Luffe" and had to shoot him. His crew seemed to object to this action and the confiscation of the One Piece treasure. The Pirates Code forbids stealing from other pirates apparently. Thank the gods that they're more guidelines.

Lisa then proceeded to heal them all though and they then had their leader keel haul me. I am getting rather sick of this.

***

Captain Rose's Log, Forgotten Freedom I
Day 8

We kidnapped King Steve today from Airship Force One and intended to hold him for ransom to the nation of Breland. This is proving to be quite problematic as there was numerous cases of celebration under the false assumption that he was killed in the attack. We are currently negotiating how much to take to NOT return him.

Given that Lisa has a "special" relationship with Princess Sarah (LIKE WHO DOESN'T-*I'VE* got a special relationship with Princess Sarah for crying out loud), its likely her father will be returned with jack and s****. With jack not being necessarily included.


***

Admiral Murphy Jarlot's Log, The REALLY Forgotten Freedom.
Day 9

I can see the souls of the dead as they leave their bodies. I will swallow the souls of my enemies. ALL BOW BEFORE THE GLORY OF MARDUK!

Oh and in other news, I kicked the stimutax habit and am back to normal. Oh, and Lisa helped us sack a church of all of its valuables. I explained to her that it was a CHURCH OF EVIL and that the valuables would go to orphans. Given I don't have a father alive, that's entirely true.

***
Commodore Jarlot's Log, Forgotten Freedom II
Day 10

Well, the Forgotten Freedom II has unfortunately become a causalty of the Cylon War. While Rose assures me that there's no such thing as Cylons, I informed President Roslin of the truth. President Roslin keeps insisting she's named Andrea and that most of humanity hasn't been destroyed.

By the way, the stimutax pills that Terra is giving me are wonderful. In other news, Starscream (whom insists his name is Rose for some reason) has been having trouble keeping the ship empowered with energon. He claims that Scarlet (whom seems to be lovers with Lady Jaye) has been keeping him from slaughtering every Lyrander we lay our hands on.

Pity, I shall order him whipped for incompetence.
Charles Phipps

09-20-06, 05:28 AM		If you want to make your own, here: http://flagrantdisregard.com/flickr/motivator.php

Now here's the FORGOTTEN FREEDOM WANTED POSTER COLLECTION

http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/Zella.jpg
http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/Terra.jpg
http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/Rose.jpg
http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/Michael.jpg
http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/Lisa.jpg
http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/Kanatash.jpg
http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/Ketler.jpg
http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/JarlotSenior.jpg
http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/Jarlot.jpg
http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/Aerith.jpg
http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/Doog.jpg
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-20-06, 08:02 AM		Bunny: Yay! Death. Pirates are always good for killing people…if it weren't for Lisa. Don't know why she didn't let us kill Peter, he's the Disney version, that should certainly qualify as EVIL.

13: Yeah, but Disney made "Gargoyles", so they aren't all bad.

Silver: Hot, half-drow detective……………*drool*

13: I see Kratwe is about to get an introduction to fem/fem :pile: "AAARRRRGGGHHHHH!" *pop*

Silver: He can get a personal demonstration if "he" wants. :devil:

13: In other news I think Gillamma and Lucky are "getting along".

Silver: Ooo, yeah. Men transformed into women, common ground right there. I checked in Caralot's books, and half-griffon is a definite possibility.

Bunny: "THINGS THAT NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO DO IF BUNNY SUGGESTS IT"? Well then how am I supposed to do my job?

Silver: Don't you just take care of them at the moment of ceasing vital functions?

Bunny: Okay, let me rephrase that: Well than what am I supposed to do for a hobby?

13: If it wasn't my job I'd suggest encouraging courses of action that eventually lead to death.

Bunny: Oh, yeah, by the way, nice work "Marduk".

Silver: I think the Satnak/Serene wedding should just go ahead. OOCrystalforged is being lax on his duties, and our E.B.N.E. never much cares for marriage.

Jarlot: Damnit, MARRIAGE IS AN ABOMINATION! Does no one understand that it removes women off the market!?

Silver: In Caralot's case, I doubt that'll stop her.

13: Greyfeline is getting obsessive about finding the perfect cake ingredients.

Bunny: Something dead.

13: But what dead things go with Satnak and Serene?

Bunny: Everything dead goes with Satnak.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-20-06, 09:39 AM		OOC: LOL Charles! Those wanted posters were hilarious. But why was Aerith Galadriel and not Aerith? And just one tiny nit-pick (no I can't help it), it's really more of a FYI, but Lisa kept her last name. Sarah was given Lisa's last name, and Elina Terra's. Kanatash as Christopher Walken is still the funniest damn thing ever. And I'm not sure, but isn't Jarlot Sr. The Doctor? I think it's #7 or something.

IC:

Terra: Hello again, Kratwe.

Kratwe: Oh, good timing. I was wondering about these two. *nods towards Elina and Sarah* They're your biological children?

Lisa: Yep.

Krawte: Who's the father(s)?

Terra: We are. :D

Krawte: :twitch: Um...

Lisa: More precisely, I'm Elina's "Father" and Sarah's Mother. The opposite is true for Sarah.

Elina: Told you.

Krawte: But how does that-

Terra: It's probably best that you don't know. Accept that it involves lots of magic and is quite enjoyable for those involved-

Sarah & Elina: MOM! :yuck:

Terra: :D -and leave it at that.

Lisa: Plus we don't want to encourage your brother.

*******

Rixle: My, my. What would a beauty like yourself be doing alone? Have these brigands no appreciation for you? Perhaps we should get better aquainted...

Andrea: :ahem:

*******

Terra: Now give me back my coin purse and my herb satchel.

Telfon: Eh heh heh...
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-20-06, 10:20 AM		Terra: Now give me back my coin purse and my herb satchel.

Telfon: Eh heh heh...
Bunny: Whatever you do, don't steal anything from me.

Telfon: Why? I'm sure Satnak told you it's automatic for me.

Bunny: Because if you do we have to call in Harry Potter.

OOC: I'm going to leave this joke hanging for now. Special Commentary Crew smily tribute if you can get it.
urial angel of death

09-20-06, 10:43 AM		20. No matter what bunny says the little blue girl in Volrath's room is not La Blue Girl.

21. You shouln't act as though she is.

22. Don't remind Volrath that P/Y/R is away, if you are a non-uber.

23. This goes doubly if unnamed and/or female.

24. Do not suggest that Muradin can't smash something.

25. Do not do the copper piece on a string trick with Squishy.

OOC: I am a horrible person.
rwarner3701

09-20-06, 10:57 AM		Alkran having recovered from his session with Reman has gathered Elin, Sakura Jeala, Jack, Danyels, Rum and Chili in one of the empty cargo holds.

Alkran: Sorry about my absence, but I had to make up for my actions towards Terra and Lisa. So what do you have to report on the cookie sales?

Sakura Jeala: We made a killing with the cookies.

Elin: Figuratively of course.

SJ: Right, with almost no cost and a huge markup we made very strong profits but our supply is gone since Martha won’t cook for us anymore.

Elin: I even said please :bigeyes:

SJ: Unfortunately the outfits drew a bit too much attention from the crew so we had to hire MCP for protection. MCP made a killing.

Elin: Much more literal in this case.

SJ: …and I bought a dress incase Weylin invites me to the wedding, but we still have a little left.

Alkran: Alright and what about the alcoholic water sales?

Rum: Well we had strong sales but between the money for Martha to repair her room and the payments to Rose for the redshirts Chili ate…

Chili: (puffs up before slumping back to the floor while making a sound somewhat similar to a sigh with a few gurgles.)

Rum: …we just broke even.

Jack: And even worse now the crew is going back to drinking and there are two weddings coming up and Jarlot is back.

Danyels: Its alright we can think of something else.

Jack: No its hopeless people will always want to drink.

Alkran: Maybe you just are going about it wrong instead of replacing the alcohol why not take away the reason to drink.

Jack: Why do people drink?

Alkran: I’m not sure but as soon as we can find out you will be closer to getting them to stop.

SJ: Me and Elin can’t help. We need to draw attention to ourselves so that Weylin and Lilly remember that we are here and invite us to the weddings.

Elin: We do?

SJ: Of course silly we can’t let them do what they want we have to make them want what we want.

Elin: If you say so.

SJ and Elin head out on the way to the main deck to find a way to draw attention to themselves that doesn’t involve Girl Scout uniforms.

Alkran: Alright Jack and Danyels you can ask around Erk’s place while Rum and Chili interrogate some redshirts and I will go talk to the Captain about why he drinks.

----
Jack and Danyels get to Erk's place and start tryingto ask the patrons questions, unfortunatly they have little luck in getting helpful answers.

Jack: This isn't working what does the book say?

Danyels: Gather Information: Given an evening with a few gold pieces to use for making friends by buying drinks.

Jack: ...of course.

----
Alkran tracks down Jarlot sleeping in his cabin and after waking him up tries to ask some questions.

Alkran: So why do you drink? And what would it take to make you stop?
Charles Phipps

09-20-06, 12:36 PM		OOC: Well I chose Galadriel because I wanted a live action actress for everyone. Terra is just the exception because no one living could do her justice ;-) As for Jarlot senior as the Doctor, I just found the implications amusing.

BTW, I still love your publishing house post with Jarlot junior.
Gladius_Lucix

09-20-06, 12:43 PM		Forbes - Actually the technical side Is my Responsibility primarily. Levy will want to see the plans herself, but You need to talk to me. She handles more of the actual hands on teaching.

LIam - EEP!

Forbes - (crooked serpent smile) I believe we have business to conduct. (places 3 platinum on the table) Keep the ffod and drink coming, tell me when that runs out. Now lets see these plans before we get to the haggling.
-----------------------------------

OOC: Liam is so in over his head:evillaugh
-------------------------------------


Liam: Are you sure you want to discuss this here? There's not much room for demonstrations. My Lab would be much better for this.

Forbes: That's okay. How about you just explain it to me, first.

Liam: Basically, The Weirsan Converter works by generating energy from warps, ridges, and holes in the time-space continuum formed by the extremely localized sources of Weirdness and Insanity present on this ship.
One of the quirks in the design is that it generates a very low amount of power on its own, due to the strange fact that it actually works. This thing here, *holds up a weirsan detector* detects the ammount of Weirsan energy generated in an area, or by an individual. Judging by the readings, you're putting off enough yourself for a decent supercharge on a standard wand.

Forbes: Interesting. You DO realize that the Island's training mainly focuses on self-reliance?

Liam: That's why I've designed short radius Weirsan Collectors, so the user's own Weirsan Energy can power whatever device they're using.

Forbes: What devices do you have?

Liam hands a few sheets of paper to Forbes.

Liam: If I remember, Satnak gave you the plans for the standard Weirsan Converter and Weirsan Receiver. These are the plans some of the various gadgets I've made. The Weirsan Shield, which Satnak used in her fight against Pun-Pun, and the Weirsan Negator, which could be useful in training for the case that one's powers are neutralized, are the two most useful to your operations there. I've got plans in the works for a training dummy that uses something similar to the Shield, where the objective would be to strike the actual dummy through the shield. So, what do you think?
rampant

09-20-06, 02:04 PM		Fine Replace Organ music with Rose on a violin (he screws this up satnak feeds him to Fred her three-headed prismatic dragon)

Satnak Stands at the alter wearing a white backless dress. The sleeves spread out at the ends and the cuffs are covered in brown and grey patterns (think celtic patterns).Behind the podium Stands Tendra in her official clerical attire. Rixle is standing next to the geust seats as the last argument with tendra for who gets to do the ceremony ended with an Atomic wedgie.

Illis is taking up the position of best man in a standard tux.

Disarray, NJ26, and Silence are the bridesmaids in crimson dresses. In somber brown and grey robes Ketty takes the place of the Matron of Honor.
Crystalforged

09-20-06, 02:36 PM		Silver: I think the Satnak/Serene wedding should just go ahead. OOCrystalforged is being lax on his duties, and our E.B.N.E. never much cares for marriage.
Kanatash: Yeah, my entity is really slacking off here. He keeps telling me "later" and talking about exams and homework. I'll bring him around soon though. I still can't believe he's placing priorities above ME. By the way I need to find Caralot. I was thinking that the Mournland would be a good place for us to have our wedding, the glass platue would be a nice touch.
rampant

09-20-06, 02:43 PM		Elina Walks down the isle in her formal school uniform, a set of blue leather with ruby armor studs. As she passes each row of seats she flicks a handful of yellow petals.

Terrek Enters with Serene, who is wearing a Traditional white dress and veil holding a boquet of Green Roses (courtesy of Terra).

Tendra - Well I've been going around getting stories about these two, I've been shown a picture of two women deeply and utterly...Retarded for each other. NOw to get this out of the way before hand, any who object to this union please stand.

Robrands - *stands*

Tendra - Only one ... good heeyaah (throws a deepcrystal great axe at robrands neatly taking his hair off)

Robrands - *sit*

Tendra - Now sit down and shut up!

Tendra - Do you Satnak d'Borisheel Vow to honor and protect Serene with all that you are, and all that you have?

Satnak - I do.

Tendra - Serene do you swear the same, and take the name d'Borisheel?

Serene - I do.

Tendra - Present Rings.

Sarah, wearing a white and green chainshirt, lifts a cushion with a pair of simple crystal circles that are simultaneously perfectly transparent and reflective.

As the two place the rings on each other's fingers.

Tendra - Let all who see these rings know them as the symbols of a bond forged by the power of two mighty souls, and let all who would interfere with that bond suffer the wrath of these two now made one.... What are you two waiting for get kissing.

Serene dips Satnak holding her back and the base of her tail.
*gratuitous make out scene*

Cheering

Now the reception. Ok guys go.
Gladius_Lucix

09-20-06, 02:48 PM		OOC: Between my last post and the start of Satnak's Wedding.

Liam: Are you really sure this is the best time for us to discuss this? Satnak's wedding is going to start soon. You might be able to survive her being angry at you, but I don't think I can. Then again, I don't know if she cares whether I'm there or not. Still, best to be on the safe side.

Liam hurries off to the Wedding.
Charles Phipps

09-20-06, 03:09 PM		In Preparations for a Pirate Wedding

Rose: Cutlasses?

Ketler: Check.

Rose: Rum.

Ketler: Sentient or otherwise?

Rose: Sentient.

Ketler: Check.

Rose: Liquid Keel?

Ketler: Check.

Rose: Undead Pirate Horde to attack at the ceremony's height to kidnap the bride?

Ketler: Check. Andrea charged extra despite us providing all those dead Red Shirts whose souls wanted vengeance.

Rose: Rixle repellent?

Ketler: I've been passing love letters so Doog thinks the two of them are in love.

Rose: Rings?

Ketler: Uh oh.

Rose: DAMNIT! WE NEED THE BLOODY RINGS!

Ketler: Wait, we have Breland and Aundair's crown jewels.

Rose: I suppose those can work....now I want this entire ship covered in two words. Chantilly Lace.

Jarlot: You better be talking about a Big Bopper song...

***

Ten MORE Days of Whacky

Commodore Jarlot's Log, Forgotten Freedom II (despite that ship being destroyed)
Day 11 of the New Log

Today, I must face the truth. I am an alcoholic. I long ago started drinking because of peer pressure. That and because the later Lyrander captain of the vessel I was on didn't believe in anestetic. I've decided to do something about it though.

I'M GOING TO KILL EVERYONE WHO BRINGS IT UP.

In other news, we successfully sacked Q'barra. The entire nation. The Lizard men are revolting....also they're rebelling. I don't quite know what sparked us to attack an entire country but I think it had to be someone calling me 'twinkle toes.'


***


Captain Rose's Log, Forgotten Freedom I
Day 12 of the New Log

The Forgotten Freedom was taken over by a Lich-Pirate King today named "Le Chuck." Enslaving the lot of us, he was able to persuade a certain paladin to help him do it because he would make reforms and force us to be nicer.

...that girls really starting to irritate me.

Well after killing him five or six times, with each time the guy coming back stronger, we've got him banished for the time being. I'm pleased to say he was a better Captain than Jarlot ever was though and actually gave me an old boot...more treasure than I've seen in months.

Oh yes, had sex with the Lady Governor of Q'barra. Apologized about the whole sacking thing. Attractive lady, her lover seemed annoyed with us though.



***

Admiral Murphy Jarlot's Log, The REALLY Forgotten Freedom.
Day 13

Damn that Edgars and Deck 6! They're ruining the entire "Feast of Doldornmas" that I had planned. Of course, SOMEONE is being a b*** about the fact that 80% of the crew don't worship Dol Dorn. Well we'll see how they feel when they're burning on the great bacon fryng pan reserved for sinners like all nonbelievers in the Great God of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms!

Lisa, I love you like a granddaughter but does your great Propane Powered God have a Feast Day devoted to Revenge and Causal Sex? If not then dump him!

Oh yes, I sent Lisa shopping. We then attacked a royal treasury ship and looted it. There were no survivors. Except this one guy, Wesley, I like him. Reminds me of the guy I took the ship from. I told him goodnight, sleep well, and I'll probably kill you tomorrow.


***
Commodore Jarlot's Log, Forgotten Freedom II
(despite that ship being destroyed)
Day 14 of the New Log

Well, the Wedding Day was delayed on the count of attack by Githyanki Corsairs from the Astral Plane. Apparently, they thought we had a Silver Sword of the Astral Plane amongst us. In the meantime, I've got this nifty silver sword I found at a local bazaar! Isn't it cool?

There was some slight trouble onboard when Terra found that Michael was attempting to clone Lisa again. This lead to gratutious hammering, which should sexually satisfy Michael for a couple of weeks. He's missed it terribly. Sabriel shapechanging into Lisa just doesn't do it for him anymore.

In the meantime, I'm continuing my "Pirates D20" supplement that should be quite successful I hope.


***

Captain Rose's Log, Forgotten Freedom I
Day 15 of the New Log

Spent all day having sex with Zella and playing Final Fantasy. I had her wearing the Yuna costume today. I think she's on to me that I'm not thinking about her lately (still talking about seperating the three hotties to get back Rikku....mmmm mechanic girls)

Sadly, all of our treasury money was lost from our raid two days ago when Doog accidentally dropped it over the city of New Cyre. I understand that they've erected a statue to him now and call him the "Hero" there.

I robbed an orphanage run by nuns before Lisa made me return all the loot. Only later did she find out they were vampire nuns and the children were lycanthropes. Apparently killing werewolves is bad no too though! She insisted we find good homes for the wolfy lads! GRR.

***

Admiral Murphy Jarlot's Log, The REALLY Forgotten Freedom.
Day 16

Broke again.

If we don't pay off Jabba the Hobbit then we're a bunch of dead men. At present, I'm trapped underneath the pop machine in the lounge and despite being visible, no one has bothered to help me over the past three days. I'm currently writing this journal with my toes.

Sadly, scorpions have started stinging me but I've managed to keep the venom out by my diet of pure distilled Jolt cola. I may be mutating into something horrible.


***
Commodore Jarlot's Log, Forgotten Freedom II
(despite that ship being destroyed)
Day 17 of the New Log

We really need that check from Terra from her drug Empire since we ran out of Dragonshard's today and got stuck in the middle of the Mournlands. I had a lot of ridiculous flashbacks after ordering the crew to evacuate.

Somehow a group found me just as I was about to die of lack of negative energy poisoning, they turned out to be pirates, I ROBBED THEM, and also got shot before my crew returned.

Overall, it was yet another incident where our lives meaninglessly resembled Firefly.


***

Captain Rose's Log, Forgotten Freedom I
Day 18 of the New Log

Terra is positively fuming today and her mood isn't likely to get any better due to the fact that Breland legalized drugs and thus has utterly destroyed her business empire. Even Lisa isn't able to cheer her up.

Oh well, since her mood can't possibly be worse, I've decided to take Elina and Sarah on a pirating mission!

It sadly didn't work out too well since we got attacked by a bunch of Ghoul Orcs (I call them "Reavers") no sooner had we robbed everyone. Then Inspector Jacob Hunter arrived and nearly pinched us. This is turning into a long week.


***

Admiral Murphy Jarlot's Log, The REALLY Forgotten Freedom.
Day 19

I finally got free of that damn pop machine. Gawds damn Deck 6 and Edgars! I'm going to order him buggered and then lashed then buggered again for what he's done to me!

It reminds me of my days under Captain Hook, now THERE was a real Captain. Never heard him complain, especially when he lost his hand to a crocodile. I had Rose try and clean out the Croc hunter guys home only to have him lose a hand and you think he'd lost something IMPORTANT!

Whine Whine whine! In any case, we attacked the Aurrum's Treasury today and made off with a pretty good haul in strong metal boxes. Hopefully Lisa won't object but if she does, I'll just put on some Old Spice and SEDUCE IT out of her.

***

Commodore Jarlot's Log, Forgotten Freedom II
(despite that ship being destroyed)
Day 20 of the New Log

Well, we found all of the Aurrum's treasury notes were kept in Aurrum Script and also Galifar bills of sale that are utterly worthless in the modern era!. Once more we need money despite being omnipotent. Admiral Jarlot's suggestion Lisa shake her money maker and 'take a few for the team' were met with violence...against me for some reason!

We also got the Spelljammer working again and unfortunately all it resulted in was us confronting a ship full of Beholder "traders." They claimed to be peaceful but the only good beholder is a DEAD beholder. It resulted in 80% of the crew dying but they'll not Beholder around us anymore!

Oh yes and Slip finally left us, saying "So long suckers! The Void I go!" So we need a new helmsman. I'm thinking of a flowered shirt guy whom plays with Dinosaurs as a replacement.
rwarner3701

09-20-06, 03:18 PM		OOC: Oh no I missed it. Guess this was supposed to go back when the organ music started to play.

The world is changed. I feel it in the water. I feel it in the earth. I smell it in the air. Much that once was is lost, for none now live who remember it. It began with the creation of the Great Girls.

Three were given to the Half-Elf, immortal, wisest and fairest of all beings.

(Image of Terra with Lisa, Elina, and Sarah standing in front of her.)

JJ: That is so cute... Hold that pose... Say cheese.

Terra: No don't do it he might come back. Just take the picture quick.

Elina and Sarah shrug.

Elina & Sarah: Cheese.

(Camera Flashes)

Cheese: I. Like. Chocolate. Milk.

Terra: Of course it took three times...

Lisa: He isn't that bad.

Seven to the Dwarf lords, great miners and craftsmen of the mountain halls.

(Image of Martha standing in front of a painting.)

Martha: It’s just disgraceful those girls flashing their ankles out where anyone can see them. I refuse to let you look and further disgrace the great dwarven people.

And nine, nine girls were gifted to the race of men, who, above all else, desire... sure lets call it power.

(Image of Jarlot on a beach surrounded by beautiful women.)

Jarlot: This is totally worth it regardless of any eternal servitude that might come later.

But they were, all of them, deceived, for another Girl was made. In the land of Teseris, the Dark Lord Terrek forged in secret a master Girl, to control all others.

(Image of Terrek working furiously away in his lab.)

And into this Girl he poured his cruelty, his malice and his will to dominate all life. One Girl to rule them all.

----
Serene is in her room getting ready for the wedding when she suddenly disappears.

In a dark cave Serene reappears. She looks around but doesn't notice anything until Gollum Jarlot is suddenly behind her stroking her hair.

Gollum Jarlot: It came to me, my own, my love... my... preciousssss.

----
Redshirt 1: Well that’s not good.

Redshirt 2: I know and worse yet someone is going to have to tell Satnak.

Another Redshirt: Well which one of us should do it.

Redshirt 1: We’ll have to draw straws.

Redshirt 2: Good idea.

Redshirt 1 takes three straws and holds them out to Another Redshirt. He draws one carefully and sees that it is short.

Another Redshirt: :banghead:

Redshirt 1: Well good luck man.

Another Redshirt walks away slowly preparing to face his doom.

Redshirt 2: I can’t believe how often that works.

Redshirt 1: (revealing two other short straws) Yeah it’s amazing how long me and you have made it.

Redshirt 2: That poor fool can’t even remember his number it is so high.

----
Another Redshirt approaches Satnak who is having the finishing touches put on her dress.

Another Redshirt: Satnak.

Satnak: What do you want?

Another Redshirt: It’s… about Serene… she is missing.

Satnak: WHAT!?!

Another Redshirt: :ghosted: You might want to check with the Alts.

Satnak storms out of the room and makes her way for the rabbit hold in the lower decks that leads to the new home of the Alt-Jarlots.

----
After much searching, Satnak finds Serene with Frodo and Gollum Jarlot and rushes up to ensure that she is fine.

Satnak: Are you ok?

Serene: Yeah I’m fine I just didn’t know the way out.

Frodo Jarlot: If you ask it of me I will give you the One Girl.

Satnak: Yeah.

Frodo Jarlot: That's not your line.

Satnak: The only reason you aren't a pile of goo is that we are both in wedding dresses and if I stain them now we won't ever get them clean in time.

Frodo Jarlot: ...fine.
urial angel of death

09-20-06, 04:58 PM		Volrath approaches Kanatash. He is dragging Jarlot and Rose by the necks. They are missing their bodies from the waist down and appear to be choking on something.

Volrath: Uncle could you please put off you wedding for a little while so I can make it. I have to punish these two for an hour or so.

Kanatash: There are a thousand reasonable reasons but which one?

Volrath: *lifts Rose* He talked about getting with P/Y/R, and this one *lifts Jarlot* commited hate crimes against beholders. Also it's part of a favor for Lisa cause her hammer arm is getting tired.

Jarlot: *gag*

Rose: *cough*

Kantash: Well that's alright but what are they choking on. Its sounds like the time I tricked a redshirt into shallowing a bratwurst whole.

Volrath: Think smaller. :D On an unrelateed note have you found a person to preside over the wedding yet. I could do it for a church other than Ted's.

Kanatash: *leaving rely up to you Crystalforged*

OOC: Poor Sa'vor without his precious Slip now. :weep: Poor Squishy not escaping when he had the chance. :weep:
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-20-06, 05:31 PM		OOcat: Poor us, who have to put up with Charles ( ;) )

Silver: Greyfeline says e's not done with the cake.

OOcat: Well tell im to hurry up.

13: Did you get them any gifts?

OOcat: I didn't have time, this was all so sudden!

Silver: I got them one. :devil:

OOcat: 13, send them a warning label.

Silver: :weep: I never get to have any fun.

Bunny: Just returned from Greyfeline. Apparently e's made a cake.

OOcat: :confused: What? How? Tell me e's face wasn't evil.

Bunny: No, e was just :D .

OOcat: Okay, that means Satnak won't be coming after us.

13: Need to prepare a speech for the reception.

OOcat: I need to think of gifts for every character I control, a speech can wait.
Charles Phipps

09-20-06, 05:38 PM		OOC: Hey, you don't like it find another DM!

One whom won't die mysteriously with most evidence pointing to me.
Crystalforged

09-20-06, 06:08 PM		Volrath approaches Kanatash. He is dragging Jarlot and Rose by the necks. They are missing their bodies from the waist down and appear to be choking on something.

Volrath: Uncle could you please put off you wedding for a little while so I can make it. I have to punish these two for an hour or so.

Kanatash: There are a thousand reasonable reasons but which one?

Volrath: *lifts Rose* He talked about getting with P/Y/R, and this one *lifts Jarlot* commited hate crimes against beholders. Also it's part of a favor for Lisa cause her hammer arm is getting tired.

Jarlot: *gag*

Rose: *cough*

Kantash: Well that's alright but what are they choking on. Its sounds like the time I tricked a redshirt into shallowing a bratwurst whole.

Volrath: Think smaller. :D On an unrelateed note have you found a person to preside over the wedding yet. I could do it for a church other than Ted's.

Kanatash: *leaving rely up to you Crystalforged*

OOC: Poor Sa'vor without his precious Slip now. :weep: Poor Squishy not escaping when he had the chance. :weep:
Kanatash: That would be perfect. Actually I was kindof planning on having you do the ceremony or if that failed, asking your father. (pauses) By the way do you need any help with those two? I've got plenty of impliments left over from what I was planning to do back when Tormos was here.
Charles Phipps

09-20-06, 06:14 PM		Rose: Actually, I would assume as Captain of the ship it would be MY responsibility to perform the ceremony.

Jarlot: You're a spoony bard. You can't. *I* will preside over the wedding.

Admiral Jarlot Sr: *I* will preside over the ceremony.

Saint Michael: My new god Tsagourra-Cthulhu promises that their marriage shall be blessed with many spawn if I marry them!

*everyone stares at Michael*

Saint Michael: There's no reason to assume he's evil.

Kanatash: As a licensed disciple of all evil, I should do the ceremony.

God: *suspiciously resembling a giant Keith Baker* I SHALL DO IT

Rose: .....uh....

Jarlot: CAPTAIN'S PRIVILEDGE!
urial angel of death

09-20-06, 06:18 PM		Volrath: If you wish uncle. *turning to the captains* Oh good you shallowed. I thought I'd never get to use the mega-tape worms. *turns to "God"* You are a fraud when the real Keith Baker comes among his creations his form is that of a hell bovine. Besides I'm doing it.
Charles Phipps

09-20-06, 06:25 PM		Rose: Volrath, I'm sorry.

*PIMP SLAP*

Volrath: What the HELL?

Rose: The little "R" in your forehead will go away after a bit.

Volrath: You don't SLAP a man. Even in the old days when that was fashionable, we'd have a GUN FIGHT afterwards.

Rose: I needed to remind you of some facts.

Jarlot: Indeed. First of all, it wasn't about Beholders Volrath. You should know that.

Rose: It was about their EXP.

Jarlot: and treasure.

Rose: The cardinal rule of being on this ship is understanding that you do NOT let an enemy that could level you up get away.

Jarlot: Remember, don't kill children because they're only worth half as much as adults.

Rose: As for our Triad lady, I know you're all for fusing fairy folk into one another.

Kanatash: Guilty.

Rose: But let's face it, there's a decided shortage of hot girls here. I didn't saw them to pieces....yet. It was only speculation. Cloning is much more cost effective.

Jarlot: Now Volrath, I want you to write NPCs are not people too on a chalkboard 500 times.
urial angel of death

09-20-06, 06:38 PM		Volrath: *chained to giant chalkboard* There is not a shortage of hot girls. There is simply a shortage of hot girls that will have anything to do with you.

Rose: *newly regenerated and trappped in a overheating steamroom with the dealkyr Micheal Jackson* Oh shutup! *screams of agony*

Jarlot: *currently having to preform for yaoi fan-girls* Kanatash I am so going to kill you!

Kanatash: Torture is so much fun! :D As is is having entity powers.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-20-06, 06:53 PM		OOC: Hey, you don't like it find another DM!

One whom won't die mysteriously with most evidence pointing to me.
OOC: * :evillaugh: of pure insanity* You can't scare me! I can't find a gaming group to save my life, so I have nothing to lose!

OOcat: Please pay no attention. :looloo:
Charles Phipps

09-20-06, 06:59 PM		Rose: How long until they figure out that its not the real us?

Jarlot: No idea.

Rose: Well at least Volrath was a good sport about the chalkboard thing.

Jarlot: You don't take torture as well as I did.

Rose: Let's just say I don't find anything funny about Michael Jackson.

Jarlot: Oh well, poor Cardinal Kronzen.

Kronzen: I'm NOT ROSE!
rampant

09-20-06, 09:36 PM		At the reception a massvely fat ugly troll in an old fashioned dress and an apron muscles through the crowds. Oddly She smells of cinnamon and drying fruit.

Micheal - Halt brutis-

troll - *ignore* Satnak? where are you?

Satnak - Grammy!!:D *tackle hug* I almost thought you'd missed it. I should have known you'd be cooking.

Matron Stonechewer - Oh ho these old bones may not be what they used to be girl, but I get around just fine. You'll find a tray of your favorites next to the cake.

Satnak - Come on You gotta meet Serene.

Matron Stonechewer - You bet your brand new tail i do.
rwarner3701

09-20-06, 10:08 PM		As the final touches are put on the reception buffet line, Chalky approaches dragging two large bags that seem to be moving.

Chalky: I have something here to add to the buffet. Their names are Jimmy and Warren.

Norbaz: Buffett?

Chalky: You pronounce it buffet the T is silent

Norbaz: No they have two T’s in their names so you pronounce them.

Chalky: Really?

Norbaz: Yeah but don’t worry Jimmy can sing for us and I’m sure Warren is worthwhile to ransom.

Chalky: Could we eat one of them… turning over a spit… with a nice honey glaze?

Norbaz: I suppose, after all people are eating the chili.

Chalky: Well take Jimmy he should have some good flavor and Warren might be to gamey. I’ll go get to work on that ransom note.

----
After being called away for the wedding Alkran finds Jarlot at the reception. Jarlot is of course drinking.

Alkran: So…

Jarlot: Hmm… two questions equals two magazines. I am thinking Wildlife Conservation and… Dog Fancy?

Alkran: No… how about Zoobooks I can pass that off on Elin.

Jarlot: Excellent.

Jarlot takes the money and orders another drink while Alkran fills out the paper work.

Jarlot: The best part of drinking is that it goes with almost everything. Right now I am drinking to celebrate the wedding and my increased chances of winning. While it is good for celebrating it also works for drowning sorrows something I did a lot while I was captain. People drink to relax, to forget, and to have a good time.

Alkran: Alright, and my other question?

Jarlot: Well most people stop drinking when they have reached their “limit” but I haven’t had a limit for years and people like Terra and Michael are the same. The best way to get someone like us to stop drinking is to get us so drunk we pass out.

Alkran: So only when you are unconscious?

Jarlot: Well that, and if we can’t handle the hangover the next day we may swear off drinking for a few days or hours until we forget how bad the hangover was.

Alkran: So if we got everyone super drunk at the same time they might not drink again for a few days?

Jarlot: I suppose so, but I just stay drunk to avoid hangovers.

Alkran: So get them all drunk enough to make them pass out until they wake up with a hangover?

Jarlot: That could work, at least one anyone with my Epic Levels like me. Now if you’ll excuse me I have some brides to dance with and more magazines to sell.
rampant

09-20-06, 10:41 PM		Terrek - I didn't know she could dance.

Serene - It took some practice, ballroom really isn't her thing.

Terrek - Who is that troll lady she's standing next to now?

Serene - I'm not sure, but these pineapple crisps she made are great.

Darastrix - I know aren't they? I tried to get her recipe, but she said family secret:( . We did trade chili recipes though:D .

Satnak - Serene *hug* This is my Grandma Stonechewer. She's invited us to visit after we get done at the frostfell. I can introduce you to the whole clan:D

Serene - Pleased to meet you Mrs. Stone-

Matron Stonechewer - Call me Grammy child, I see my little deary picked out a little bard of her own. Good choice, bards make excellent spouses, except the spoony kind. My husband was a bard, dashing chap, I was always having to save his cute butt, but by these old bones he could sing. Heheha. So how long till i have great grand kids to spoil rotten.:D

Satnak - :embarrass

Serene - :embarrass We are waiting a while so we have time to prepare, you know, crib, nursery, budget. A few months to a year or 2.

Matron Stonechewer - Smart girls, thats a big step. Although no amount of planning can actually prepare you for your own sprats.

Terrek - Right you are madam.

Matron Stonechewer - Ah so your Terrek, this youngin's pa.

Terrek - Indeed.

Matron Stonechewer - She must take after her ma.

Terrek - (i.h.h. did she just insult me?)
Charles Phipps

09-20-06, 10:50 PM		BTW: This thread has inspired me to do a D20 Pirate Supplement for my game setting.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-20-06, 11:12 PM		OOC: *blink* Holy crap. Satnak and Serene's wedding is done already? Man... :P :D

And are the "Days of Wacky" canon or just fun? Cause Terra really wouldn't be upset about Breland legalizing drugs. She's trying to get out of that business anyway.

Still funny though.
Charles Phipps

09-20-06, 11:27 PM		OOC: The Days of Whacky are canon but they're also written from in-characters so what happens as recorded in the logs of the Three Captains is not necessarily what happened in reality.

if nothing else, they allow me to at least imply SOME pirating goes along (and also why it's so damned difficult to make a buck with her around)
rampant

09-20-06, 11:53 PM		OOC: You can still post reception stuff. No kidnappings though. They get a day off.
Charles Phipps

09-20-06, 11:55 PM		OOC: Nah, the actual wedding went off without a hitch ;-)
rampant

09-21-06, 02:23 AM		OOC: You'd think cypher, Urial, or Kaizer might have something.
-------------------------------

Satnak - Ghost boy!

Kanatash - Yes:rolleyes:

Satnak - Here its for you and Caralot in case we're not back. Oh by the way It will only open if Caralot says the pass word. So no peeking. Also...

Kanatash - OH cuthulu the images!

Satnak - Its got anti-peeking devices.

Kanatash - Did you have to use that purple freak!?!?:mad:

Satnak - No but it was fun.:D
cypher_zero

09-21-06, 07:09 AM		OOC: Sorry. Bad timing for me. I dm on Wednesday nights and I'm working a 12 hr shift today. Won't be anything from me till tonight. Just keep it rolling till then; I've got some stuff planned.
.
urial angel of death

09-21-06, 07:29 AM		OOC: There wasn't really much I could do. He can't show up because I already have the encounter planned out (also Kaizer and Rei have to meet Hime in game) , Kefka is enjoying the Mournlands until Kanatash's ceremony, Diablo 2 spoofs have no place here, and the last plot line I have planned is just too mean to do someone on their wedding day (also I haven't planned it out with Rampant yet).
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-21-06, 07:48 AM		OOcat: It's nice to see that in Satnak's dimension trolls aren't treated as just another mindless tank for someone to hack apart.…………………………………:zzz:

13: It's gone again.

Bunny: Ooo, Terrek got zinged!

Silver: You know, I invented booze.

Bunny: With a little help from me.

Silver: Yeah. Loosens inhibitions in so many great ways. :D

Bunny: Seriously. :devil:

13: I heard Greyfeline made an ice sculpture instead of a cake. It has Satnak standing astride all her enemies, who have partially been broken into the ice cubes people use for their drinks.

Bunny: Still need to figure out something to give them.

Silver: :D

Bunny: Starting with a warning label for Silver's.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-21-06, 10:42 AM		OOC: I'm suffering from a serious case of writers block. And I was on a roll with Sarah Saga :( . Ok...gotta do something...

IC:

On the dance floor, Terra and Lisa weave through the other couples as they waltz.

Terra: Brings back memories, doesn't it?

Lisa: :) It sure does. Feels like only yesterday...

Terra: It just makes me so glad to see Satnak finally find someone she can share her life with.

Lisa: They found each other a while ago. This is just a formality. Like ours.

Terra: Heh. True.

SJ and Weylin pass by.

SJ: :cloud9:

Weylin: *anime sweatdrop*

Terra: ;) That'll be interesting no matter how it pans out.

Lisa: They're so cute together. But where are our kids? I haven't seen them in a bit.

Terra: They're over there, stealing the show.

Through the crowd, Sarah and Elina can be seen dancing in tandem. The thing is...there are multiples of each. As they move, afterimages form and begin dancing slightly behind in the routine before fading. As the song ends, the images vanish and they take a bow to applause. Obviously tired, they find a table and almost collapse into the chairs.

Elina: That stuffs harder than it looks! How does Mom do that without passing out?

Sarah: It's fun though. Mom and Momma said we should get used to our powers before they fully manifest.

Elina: With the looks we were getting, I think it was a really good idea to decline Ketler's suggestion for a routine.

Sarah: What was her name again? "Britney Swords" or something...

Elina: Spears. Man, what a showoff!

Sarah: She has absolutely no respect for herself. Pretty, yes, but no fasion sense either.

Ketler: (off to the side) Dammit! Why? Why didn't it work?! :weep: Girls love to emulate that kind of thing, so why? :weep:

OOC: Since Jaela is now legal, Ketler's gotta focus elsewhere...

:eek: Oh, crap. Sarah and Elina are the new Jaela Daran. :eek:

2##: All rules referring to Jaela also apply to Sarah and Elina where applicable

2##+1: What is applicable will be decided by their parents, not you

Ketler: :weep: Awwwwwwwww.......
urial angel of death

09-21-06, 12:39 PM		OOC: Well marriage is always just a formality, either that or a lie.
rampant

09-21-06, 01:56 PM		Tirmek - I envy your ease with your outsider nature. I've never been able to bring myself to use my active abilities.

Elina - Huh?

Sarah - You seemed to have the Rakshasa resilience when we fought.

Tirmek - *hmph* I cannot help that, besides what really got you was the stone bone strike and that isn't a Rakshasa power. I mean the mind reading and shape shifting, I've never even clawed someone.
----------------------------------

Satnak - Thanks for helping me get this down, I didn't want to be stepping on your toes all throught the party.

Serene - Trust me it was enlightened self interest, that and an excuse to be all over you.

Satnak - :embarrass
luna18moon

09-21-06, 04:30 PM		Slaypaw walks up to Satnak at the reception.
Slaypaw: Mrow *Fluffy and i have a present for you*
Satnak: What is it?
Slaypaw ducks under a table and bings out four kittens. The kittens are greenish-tinged, but are still very cute.
Slaypaw: Mewmrow *Grandkittens* :)
Satnak: Wow... so that's where Fluffy's been. What are their names?
Slaypaw: mew reow mrowl *You and Serene get to name them*
Satnak: Thanks Slaypaw :). We'll think of good names for them.
Slaypaw: Mrowl mewr. Errow! Reowmow! *We know you will. Fluffy! Greyfeline!
Fluffy and Greyfeline come running.
Fluffy: (assume they're meowing) *Yes, my love?*
Slaypaw: *First, do you two have any more catnip cake?:bigeyes:*
Greyfeline: ;)*hands her a cake*
Slaypaw: *Thanks :cloud9: Fluffy, let's go somewhere more... comfortable*
Fluffy: *As you wish.* ;) at Greyfeline.
Slaypaw picks up the kittens and leaves.
OOC: Anyone got name ideas?
Crystalforged

09-21-06, 04:52 PM		Pestilance, War, Famine, and Death.

The four horsemen of the Apocalypse.
urial angel of death

09-21-06, 05:11 PM		Gluttony, Envy, Greed, and Wrath

The four deadly sins Fluffy most embodies and the four coolest homoculi in the FMA manga.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-21-06, 05:41 PM		OOC: Hairball, Cool-look, Shredder, and Beauty.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-21-06, 09:16 PM		Tirmek - *hmph* I cannot help that, besides what really got you was the stone bone strike and that isn't a Rakshasa power. I mean the mind reading and shape shifting, I've never even clawed someone.
Elina: Maybe you should talk to Mom about it. The Half-Fiend part was essentially forced on her. The Demon guy Grandpa Halester and Grandma Laurel got mixed up with is the source of it.

Sarah: Mom hates him with a passion. It's not exactly the same situation, but she'd probably know how you feel more closely than we do. We see both our Outsider and Lycanthropic natures as coming from our mommies, so it's harder for us to understand what you're going through.

Tirmek: Hmmm...

Elina: Would you at least consider it? It might be helpful, even if all you do is vent.

Tirmek: ...very well. I will keep it in mind.

Sarah: Good. Now lets get some more food. I'm starving.

Elina: Me too.

Tirmek: :uh-huh: How can you possibly be hungry? I saw you two eat the equivalent of a five course meal less than an hour ago!

Sarah: :P Dancing works up an appetite.

Elina: :D Plus, it takes a lot of energy to be as cute as we are!

Tirmek: *hand to face* Groan...
urial angel of death

09-21-06, 09:26 PM		Elina: Tirmek: *hand to face* Groan...

There is a smiley for that :)
Kaizer_Ryu

09-21-06, 09:38 PM		There is a smiley for that :)
The :doh: smilie doesn't really fit in that instance. I thought about using it, but just didn't work.
rampant

09-21-06, 09:47 PM		Tirmek - These are good, I didn't think anything called a Crineapple crisp could taste good.

Terra - Goes to show you, "whats in a name?" and all that.

Tirmek - Quite alot I like to believe...*sigh* might as well.

Terra - Huh?

Tirmek - Elina and Sarah tell me you also had issues with your Fiendish heritage. Now ... I... I need help. The knowledge of what he did to my mother, of what I am because of him. I can't stand it. What I know of that creature makes me sick, and I see him every time i look in the mirror!
Kaizer_Ryu

09-22-06, 12:01 AM		Terra: ...well, I guess our situations are quite similar. Though, I can see how your own image torments you. That's one thing I don't have to deal with...

Tirmek: He's all I see, every day.

Terra: I'll give you a bit more detail into my situation first. Maybe knowing you're not alone will help more than anything else I can say.

She leans back and holds her hand over the table. Several shadows coalesce into colored figurines. The miniature forms of Halester (pre-corruption) and Ariajni appear. The figures move as she talks.

Terra: Before I was even concieved, my father was murdered by Ariajni, a Rakshasa much like your own father. My mother was crushed and left the group the two of them had been a part of with my siblings.

The figures shift to Theronas reforming her father.

Terra: The bastard I gained my Fiendish nature from stole my father's soul and infused it with his own power. He ressurected my father's body and turned him into a quasi-avatar. My mother hasn't told me the whole story, but the two of them abducted her and brought her to the Plane of Shadow.

The figures shift to a scene at an altar. Several figures surround it, including Halester, Laurel, and a small boy. On the altar is a small girl surrounded by more figures.

Terra: They tried to use my sister first, but the strain was too great. She broke body, heart, and soul. Years later, they tried to use my brother, but had only slightly better success. He only went completely insane. And not in a good way.

Tirmek: What was the point of all this? What purpose did it serve?

Terra: His only goals were power and death, and lot's of them. He wanted to prove himself worthy to his own father and join the Dark Six. The power you are seeing now originally came from that deity.

Tirmek: The Shadow... Where do you come in?

Terra: Once my sister broke, he decided to mold a new potential avatar from beginning to end. It would become the medium through which he would absorb other beings into himself. He could not do that alone. He needed a vessel with which to contain these energies.

Tirmek: You?

Terra: Indeed. Through my father, he raped my mother and created me. My mother is the one who prevented this from coming to fruition. Instead of seeing me fulfill my role, she killed me. I was sent to this plane in a freak accident when they ressurrected me. So you see, we are quite similar.

Tirmek: Then tell me...how do you deal with it? Every time you use those powers, you see him, do you not?

Terra: I have several things in my favor. Physically, I don't resemble him at all. That part I can't help you with, unfortunately. *she puts her hand around the figure of Theronas and crushes it* A major one is that I killed him with my own hands. This allowed me to put some of my issues to rest.

Tirmek: That doesn't help me either. Aunt Satnak took care of him.

Terra: That is where the rest of it comes in. Using what you have is not a crime. Many races have special abilities. That doesn't mean they're all alike. It is not a sign of approval of your father's actions to use your Rakshasa abilities.

Tirmek: But it is a reminder of where I come from. What had to happen in order for me to even exist.

Terra: While that is true, the fact that it bugs you to have such abilities is proof enough that you are nothing like him. The fact that what he did to your mother causes you pain is what sets you apart. You are not him. You never were him. So long as you remember why you hate him, you never will become him.

Tirmek: It is this hate that consumes me!

Terra: Hate in and of itself is not a bad thing. Your father is dead, so you have nowhere to turn it other than the memory of someone you've never even met. In his place, you have set yourself.

Tirmek: But...no...it's him I...

Terra: You said it yourself, you see him in the mirror. Whether you noticed it or not, you have turned the hate meant for him and directed it at yourself.

Tirmek: ...

Terra: I can tolerate my abilities, and even allow them to be passed on, because I know that I and my daughters are not like Theronas. I have picked my own path, and they are finding theirs. Our power does not determine who we are, only our options. Even then, the difference is only minimal.

Tirmek: How can I make the distinction?

Terra: I don't expect you to be able to do anything over night. It may even be years before you can accept what you have and who you are. Unfortunately, things like this require some measure of maturity. I was given a head start because I didn't even know about this till a few years ago. It was still hard.

Tirmek: Is there nothing I can do now?

Terra: I have an idea. The main difference between us is the direction of our hate. I have a memory and a face to put mine to. Perhaps...you need one as well.

Tirmek: He's dead. I don't think anyone wants him back, either.

Terra: I was talking more about a reasonable facsimilie. A training dummy, a construct, or something like that made to look like him.

Tirmek: It would not be real. I don't see how that would help.

Terra: You'd be surprised. Ketty told me how you struggle to hide the venom you hold for your father. It may not come right away, but if you can unleash it at something other than your own reflection...

Tirmek: ...I might dissociate myself from him.

Terra: Exactly. You can do whatever makes you comfortable. If you want your mother with you, if you want someone else there, even if you want to be left alone. Say whatever you want to him. Tell him everything you hate about him. You'll probably feel silly at first, but keep at it. It's amazing how the mind works. If you want to spend all day giving him the cold shoulder, so be it. If you want to scream and yell, cursing his name to the depths of Khyber till you can no longer speak, be my guest. If you want to tear him to pieces for what he did, then jump on the pieces till you get blisters, more power to you. You need an outlet. Something to channel this anger till you are ready to face it.

Tirmek: How would I know I'm ready?

Terra: When you can look at yourself in the mirror and see Tirmek, son of Ketty. When you can stand up to the image of your father...and just walk away. Be patient. Your pain is deep.

Tirmek: Is that it?

Terra: Remember that you are your own person. If you like, have your mother tell you stories about yourself when you were little. What are her fondest memories of you? Your firsts, things you used to do as a baby. Stuff like that. The one thing we moms like to brag about most is our kids. Indulge her a bit. You'll feel better, too. :) And don't be afraid to talk to me more. If you think I can help, I'd be more than happy to oblige. You're a good kid. You don't deserve this kind of burden.

OOC: Feel free to continue with this, rampant. Hopefully I got my point across well enough. It's so hard to put thoughts into writing sometimes. *sigh*
rwarner3701

09-22-06, 12:53 AM		Alkran, Jack, Danyels, and Rum meet back up after their seperate fact finding missions and Darian shows up also.

Alkran: So what did you find out?

Rum: Chili says the redshirts give him gas so we only got to ask a few. They didn't ahve much to say other than screams for help.

Jack: After sacrificing many of our kin we found that most people were drinking to relax.

Alkran: Ok, Jarlot said that people drink for lots of reasons and that if we get them drunk enough they will stop for awhile.

Jack: Really?

Danyels: That is great.

Alkran: Won't you have to sacrifice all of the elementals back on your plane to pull off that big of a party?

Danyels: They all come back just without any memory.

Alkran: So why were you sent?

Jack: With the high booze consumption of this ship we were having great purges regularly and it shortened life span severely.

Danyels: Even with time moving faster there.

Jack: Since we have been so ineffective we became the laughing stock of the plane and can't go back.

Danyels: But if there is one large purge and they all forget then we can go back.

Jack: And with the time differance we can live out most of the rest of our lives before most of the crew recovers.

Alkran: Really?

Jack: It has been generations since we left we don't even know anyone there anymore.

Alkran: Great what are we throwing a party for?

Rum: No seasonal parties for a few months still.

Darian: We can throw a party from the Entities timeline.

Alkran: Like what?

Darian: Well from the perspective of the great all powerful ones it is almost one year since all of us came to exist.

Alkran: Really?

Darian: Yes and we can mask this great occassion by throwing a birthday party for Captian Jarlot.

Alkran: So when does it reach a year for them?

Darian: September 23rd and according to my sources the 22nd is starting just now.

Alkran: We better get to work spreading the word and collecting the booze.

Everyone heads off in a differant direction while Darian stands around waiting.

Darian: ...well?

OOrwarner3701: What?

Darian: Wasn't that a bit forced?

OOrwarner3701: Give me a break it took longer to get Jarlot back than I thought.

----
OOC: If we want to hold of Jarlot's party until the wedding gets finsihed IC we can just wanted to get the OOC timing right. Either way remember it is a party for the awesome entities as much as for Jarlot so booze, booze, presents and more booze.

Does anyone still own Chalky? I had an idea for him but wasn't sure who to ask about it.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-22-06, 01:04 AM		OOC: Chalky is rampant's creation, but he's not terribly hard. So long as he's causing something to bleed or being mischevious, he's happy. Check this out. :devil:

IC:

Rose: Sooooo....behind the tent?

Zella: Oh for the love of...it's a wedding reception!

Rose: Isn't that what happens at this kind of thing?

Zella: Not until later, and only for-

Rose: In an hour, then?

Zella: ...fine.

*KAPOW* (Sovereign Glue Paint bomb)

Rose: :mad: I'm red now, aren't I?

Zella: *snicker* Nope. Worse. You're rose.

Chalky: *in the bushes* :devil:

*KAPOW*

Zella: :mad:

Rose: Magenta. Not a bad look for you.

Sarah & Elina: *next to Chalky* :devil:

Chalky: You have learned well, grasshoppers.
rampant

09-22-06, 01:33 AM		OOC: Go ahead, Chalky is officialy open. Just remember he only thinks he's a shifter.:rolleyes:
--------------------------------

Forbes - Liam we have business to conclude.

Liam - Ulp:eek:
---------------------------

Caralot - Get away your oozing and not in a cute way.

Disarray - Awww

Caralot - Get it off of me!

Kanatash - I can't!

Caralot - Ketler has comic books that start like this.

Disarray - *hic* i just want some *hic* more cinnamon

Caralot - Sweet thrys its drunk! Screw with its brain!

Kanatash - there is nothing to mess with!
-----------------------------------------

Rixle - What is it with people on this ship hows a man sposed to get any when all the cuties are taken, straight, lesbians, hammer prone or a combo platter.

Rose - (holding a hammer) Stay back!

Zella - this is just too funny :rofl:
--------------------------------------

Naz'roth - I knew she was strong, but this is ridiculous.

Tara - Its amusing to watch though.

Naz'roth - That it is.

Redshirt - The apocolypse has co-hurgk

Levy - Whats wrong with these people?

Pholly - All she did was breathe in his general direction!:eek:
----------------------------------------

Kratwe - I still don't get it, how doesthat work without a guy?

Ketty - Ask Saberial.

Kratwe - WHo?

Ketty - Lady's mother.

Kratwe - Who?
--------------------------------------

OOC: Before I can do this next scene I'd like to know about where is Lady agewise at this point?
----------------------------------

Telfon - I'm sure I don't know what your talking about.

Jarlot sr. - My hat you talking tin can!!

Telfon - What hat?

Jarlot - The hat on your worthless empty souless metal head!!

Telfon - I call slander and bigotry, I'm gonna sue. Wheres a lawyer?

Reman - Here.

Jarlot sr. - He stole my hat!

Telfon - The real issue is the foul stream of anti-construct propaganda and slander. BEsides, what hat?

Reman - I see no hat sir.

Telfon - Really what would I do whith a hat?

Jarlot sr. - He's hiding it!

Reman - He has no skin to burn, and his race is normally bald. What use would he have for your hat?
Kaizer_Ryu

09-22-06, 01:44 AM		OOC: Before I can do this next scene I'd like to know about where is Lady agewise at this point?
She's only a few years old. Two, maybe three. Slightly coherent scentences, but otherwise your typical overpowered toddler that can transform into a giant scorpion. :D
rampant

09-22-06, 01:50 AM		Tirmek - Funny.

Terra - What is?

Tirmek - Your fiend got killed going for the very thing that got mine.

Terra - :confused:

Tirmek - Becoming one of the Dark Six. Toren was recognized as the seventh till Aunt Satnak got to him. I think I'm a tad hysterical.
rampant

09-22-06, 01:59 AM		Kratwe - Please tell me she isn't the critter crawling up my shin.

Lady - Hello:D

Kratwe - *forbidden arts spock eyebrow raise* An Entomanthrope?

Lady - (from spider to mantis) aaahhh nope

Kratwe - I think my brain just exploded.

Igor - Where thid I puth my mop?
Charles Phipps

09-22-06, 02:30 AM		OOC:

I think you guys will like the Endless Seas Pirate's Handbook; I'm already on Page 10 and it'll include the Forgotten Freedom, Jarlot, Rose, Zella, Ketler, Aerith, Ishmael Junior, Jacob Hunter, and Lisa the Paladin Pirate. You'll also all be thanked in the dedication.

IC:

Captain Jarlot: Now for the Wedding Reception Speech.

Satnak: We haven't had the wedding yet!

Captain Jarlot: Oh right. *BELCH*

Satnak: Good god, how much have you had!?

Captain Jarlot: I dunno. Remember that bottle in your room...

Satnak: MY DECANTER OF ENDLESS ALE!?

Captain Jarlot: Das da one....I drank it.

Satnak: You drank an entire para-elemental dimension?

Captain Jarlot: So it seems. In any case, by the power invested in me by the State of Q'Barra Gaming association, please pick up your complimentary poker chips and dice at the end of the Church hall after the ceremony.....I now pronounce you...

Satnak: You're not marrying us like that! OR AT ALL!

Captain Jarlot: Oh right, the speech first. *cough* Marrriagggggggeeee is a Dweam within a Dweam.

Rose: Oh for crying out loud.

Captain Jarlot: When I first met Satnak, she was still a godlike avatar of destruction obsessed with killing me.

Satnak: That hasn't changed.

Captain Jarlot: And Serene was the sprightly girl that everyone loved but no one went after because we were all afraid of Satnak and we could see the Twue Wuv from a mile away.

Rose: Twue Wuv?

Captain Jarlot: Yes, twue wuv.

Michael: *hand raised* Why do the Free chips only have 1 copper piece value on them?

Captain Jarlot: QUIET! I'm trying to conduct a marriage here....which for ONCE has to do with love.

Rose: I've been married several times.

Zella: The judge ruled all of those weren't legally binding.

Captain Jarlot: Since that time, we've all grown to fear Satnak even more and love Serene much greater. Therefore, its only natural....

Michael: We offer Serene to appease the wrathful deity?

*Captain Jarlot pulls out a pistol from his pants and shoots Michael*

Captain Jarlot: Now that is taken care of...

Michael: YOU SHOT ME!

Captain Jarlot: Taken care of quite thoroughly...

Michael: You shot me in the arm!

*Captain Jarlot makes a gesture for Rose and Zella to take care of it as they drag Michael out before multiple gunshots are heard*

Captain Jarlot: Thank you. I wish you two many happy returns and may your children not require the devastating power wielded by your mother. Like our other Next Generation members....

Pichard: Prochaine génération ? me parlez-vous ?

Captain Jarlot: Not you Frenchie.

Pichard: We We.

Captain Jarlot: They'll always have a home on this ship. Now as Captain of this ship....

Rose: Except I'M the Captain.

Captain Jarlot: I pronounce you two wedded in the name of the Forces of Chaos, Dol Dorn, and the better world we all wish for. Now, lets go celebrate this Dol Dorn wedding in traditional Dol Dorn fashion by getting some bats and going to beat up some Krebs.

Rose: Dol Dorn was a Kreb.

Captain Jarlot: BAH! That's why they also drew and quartered him solely because he threw the priests out of the temple so he could turn it into a Gun and Pawn. In any case, they're married now so that Dol Dorn can favor their coupling more.

Admiral Jarlot: That's what I said!

Rose: Oh...gawds...why is he naked?

Admiral Jarlot: What, this isn't a betazoid wedding?

Pichard: MON DEUI!
Charles Phipps

09-22-06, 02:32 AM		OOC: Hehehe, loved the Magenta reference Kaizer.
rampant

09-22-06, 02:38 AM		Tendra - *Chases Jarlot with an axe* I already performed a ceremony for them you git!

Jarlot - Why do women only chase me with weapons?
--------------------------------

Bunny - Good lord! is that his gall bladder?

Silver - Either that or his endochrine system wont be recoveing any time soon.

Jarlot - MY CLAVIN!!
Charles Phipps

09-22-06, 02:49 AM		IC:

OOC: Bah, Jarlot needed to add his blessings.

IC:

In the Darkest Dungeons of Breland

Doog: Here boy, woo whoo...

*Doog holds out a bone to lure a dog with the keys to the cell*

Ishmael Junior: Once more, I'm trapped alone with Doog in a cell.

Doog: Just coincidence Ishmael.

Ishmael Junior: That's what you said when you had to strip search me, when we have to share showers, when you informed me that its how Greeks taught their pirates!

Doog: I didn't here you complaining.

Ishmael Junior: Ishmael is a very lonely man!

*A now Middle Aged Jacob Hunter walks up to the cell while wearing a Fedora, eating some ramen, and growling*

Jacob Hunter: I've been searching for them for ten years! Now where's Lupin!

Doog: What?

Jacob Hunter: I mean the Forgotten Freedom!? DAMN THAT LUPIN!

Doog: Jacob have you slept?

Jacob Hunter: About eight years ago.

Doog: Damn, you're still sore about that whole tar and feathering thing.

Jacob Hunter: MUST GET LUPIN!
rampant

09-22-06, 03:18 AM		OOC: I'm giving them the send off tomorrow, just a warning to hurry up.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-22-06, 03:49 AM		OOC: As far as gifts, should they open them before they leave or after? Or does it matter?

IC:

Terra: Now now, don't get too worked up. This is a happy occasion.

Tirmek: It's just...thinking about Toren is so...aggravating.

Terra: That's another skill to strive for. You need an outlet, yes, but being able to talk yourself down is invaluable. You already have a grasp of it on the battle field.

Tirmek: It's easier there because I have something to focus on.

Terra: Use that then. Pick something to focus on. Think of something that makes you happy, or at least brings you a sense of calm. The goal is not to bury those feelings, but to focus your attention elsewhere. They'll still be there when a more appropriate time to express them arrives.

Tirmek: You make it sound so easy...

Terra: :) Heh. It does sound that way, doesn't it? No one can do that all the time, anyone who says otherwise is lying. You just have to try your best. I wish it was easier than that. But there is one last thing to mention.

Tirmek: What?

Terra: Watch out for what my adopted mother used to call OPMS.

Trimek: :confused:

Terra: Oh Poor Me Syndrome. This hate you bear has an element of self pity as well.

Tirmek: :mad:

Terra: :) Don't get mad. I've fallen into it on numerous occassions. Everyone does. Just remember, those around you will give you signals if you fall in too far. But enough about negative things. I think you need to have some fun for a bit. As do they...

Tirmek: Wh-

Sarah: *grabbing his arm* :D C'mon, you've gotta see this!

Elina: *other arm* :D Lady's totally freaking out Krawte! It's hilarious!

Terra smiles and waves at Tirmek as the two girls drag the befuddled boy away.
urial angel of death

09-22-06, 07:27 AM		Volrath: Hey Satnak.

Satnak: What?

Volrath: Here's the presents for you and Serene. Sorry I couldn't get the fireworks on time.

*Palom and Porom materialize.*

Palom: I'm telling you we have to take a left at Athas then a right at Realm Space.

Porom: We tried that, five times!

Palom: You weren't doing it correctly. I'm speaking of right and left on a philisophical level.

Porom: If you'd look around you you'd realize we're already here.

Palom: *looks* Okay you win.

Porom: :D

Volrath: Well they can atleast preform at Kanatash's wedding. See you later I got to use the Cake Cutter of Doom!

OOC: Rampant if Satnak ever uses the wish token, just have her state the wish and I will write the results.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-22-06, 08:38 AM		OOC: rwarner did the original in a PM to me, but I rewrote it so heavily that it's pretty much my work.
OOcat: Okay, rwarner3701 wants to do something special for Jarlot's birthday.

13: I would think he's more of an unbirthday person.

Silver: Oh, no you don't, it's my job to do March Hares, but Bunny is the lapine one around here. :mad:

Bunny: You do March anything. :bored: And the word "March" is misleading about how often.

Silver: I know what Jarlot wants. :D

Bunny: Any idiot knows what Jarlot wants.

OOrwarner3701: Can we get back to my idea about the wanted posters?

OOcat: We don't do plots.

OOrwarner3701: Just one little errand. (hands 13 the list) A short jaunt.

13: A little errand? :eek: This is hardly just a short jaunt back though time, you want to visit places all over Khorvaire scattered through the last few decades.

OOrwarner3701: Look no one ever caught him it won't really matter if some small towns lose a few wanted posters. How many bounty hunters visit hamlets anyway?

Bunny: :mad: Wanted posters are an important part of my job. We can't just go stealing them from time.

13: What about us not doing anything important?

OOcat: Our motto: Rules were made to be broken.

13: I thought our motto was: Everything is funny?

OOcat: We have a lot of mottos.

OOrwarner3701: :bigeyes:

13: Oh, okay.

OOrwarner3701: :w00t:

13: But you're going back on your own.

OOrwarner3701: :confused:…………………:eek:

*ZAP!*
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-22-06, 08:47 AM		Caralot: Will someone get this thing off me?

Silver: I've watched the DVDs. I'm not letting this go until something "fun" happens. :devil:

13: Wonder why Kratwe is getting so freaked out over Lady?

Bunny: Wait until Lady burrows her way through a redshirt.

13: It's a good thing that Tirmek is taking to Terra. Hate for him to go all angsty on us.

Silver: Especially considering he's got the perfect "my father is an evil demon" thing going.

Bunny: I'm not doing any tragic angsty deaths.

Silver: *sigh* Well, I guess Sarah won't get the chance to sooth the heart of a bad boy.

Bunny: There are too many people who are going to come after us.
rampant

09-22-06, 10:43 AM		OORampant (holding a torch and pitchfork) - Stupid Flaky angry mobs, always ditching you to chase some stupid awakened flesh golem.

Silver - :lol:

13 - :D

Bunny - :rofl:
-----------------

Kratwe - This I need to get a good look at.

From under her sleave a Tentacle whip reveals itself.
On its end an eye opens and begins peering at Lady.

Kratwe - Fascinating, complete dual skeletal structure, and ... I don't even know what that is, I wonder how much control she will have? and further more what is she?

Elina - That eye is kinda creepy.

Tirmek - You should see her armor.

Sarah - Lemme guess, living breastplate.

Elina - What did she do? Mug a dealkyr?

Tirmek - No her family has been breeding their own living weapons for a while. I think her grandma on the mother's side was the last one who had to mug a dealkyr.
------------------------------------

OOC: as for gifts lets go now.
-------------------------------------

Serene - its beautiful *hug*

Elina - Haaallp

Sarah - Muflere (mouth full of Crinapple crisp)

Volrath - This would be so much more fun without P/Y/R and Satnak giving me the evil eye.

Nalfein - Can't breeeeeeeeeathe.
Gladius_Lucix

09-22-06, 10:44 AM		Forbes - Liam we have business to conclude.

Liam - Ulp:eek:
Liam: I left the plans with you when I left for the wedding. What did you think of them? I do have a request, though. If you put these into general use, I'm willing to offer classes or seminars in the use of Weirsan Energy, and repair and maintenance of the Weirsan Converter. Also, for safety reasons, the only people to perform any repairs to the Weirsan Converter should be me or people trained by me. As long as that condition is met, I'll give you a lifetime guarantee on the quality.
rampant

09-22-06, 10:48 AM		Forbes - I'm interested, lets get to what this is gonna cost me to install, and maintain.

They settle on aseat next to an open bar (mysteriously unpatroned) and begin negotiations.

Forbes - Break it down price wise.
Gladius_Lucix

09-22-06, 11:04 AM		Liam: Pricewise? Well, for the original model, I was just using an open line of credit from Morgrave University, so I didn't really keep track of how much it cost. Could I see the plans again for a second?

Liam takes the plans, and pulls out an abacus.

Liam:*mutters* Where's Squishy when you need him?

Going over the inventory, Liam marks off each component and tallies it up on the abacus. As he works, he mentions an idea to Forbes.

Liam: What I was originally going to do was market the energy produced by this. What you could do is sell somewhat down powered Weirsan Receivers to the general public, and charge a subscription for receiving power. I don't know if adventuring is as big a profession in your Eberron as it is in this one, but it could be a profitable venture. Also, by my calculations, if the components of the converter are made here, the difference between the worlds increases the output dramatically.

With a final click of the beads, Liam finishes the computations.

Liam: Ah, here we are. It looks like, if we built it here and shipped it, it would take about a half ton of gold to buy all the components. Labor wouldn't be too much more, probably just two or three hundred pounds. I don't know if you use the same size gold pieces in your Eberron or not, so I gave it in bulk weight.

----
Meanwhile, the Duct Tape Swarm rolls over to Serene and Satnak.

Duct Tape Swarm: Liam's a little busy with business talks, so here's the presents from us.

The Swarm hands gifts off to each of them, in Duct Tape patterned wrapping paper.

Duct Tape Swarm: For you, Satnak, since you're a teacher now, Liam picked out the most best coffee available. He said it was the favorite of the professors at Morgrave. We did a little refining ourselves, so it should be strong enough for dealing with the kids on the island.

Satnak: Thank you.

Duct Tape Swarm: And for Serene, we didn't know what you would want, so we got you this.

Serene unwraps a Weirsan powered microphone.

Serene: Um... Thanks.

Duct Tape Swarm: I'm sorry. We thought there would be more time before the wedding.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-22-06, 11:22 AM		Lisa: We figured, since you're married now, we'd get you something you could both use.

She pulls out a book with no title. It is bound in white, with what appears to be both a regular and magical lock keeping it closed. A small key hangs from a string attached to it.

Lisa: Since you're new at the whole "being a couple" thing, we figured you could use a few "pointers" as a head start.

Satnak: :blush: :blush:

Terra: Don't worry, there's nothing specifically involving us in there. Nothing with tentacles, either. ;)

Serene: :blush: You're enjoying this, aren't you?

Lisa: :D Extremely. The lock on there can only be opened by the two of you. We also left a lot of blank pages in there for any interesting ideas you come up with.

Satnak: :blush: Oi. I should have seen this coming.

Terra: Hey, we had some knowledge that would help our friends. How could we not?

Serene: :blush: Not to mention you get to see us go completely red.

Lisa: :D That too. It's so cute.

Terra: Just remember that that book is yours and yours alone. You can put whatever you want on it's pages. If you don't want other people to open it, they can't, not even us. It's warded against anything that could break the magical lock except antimagic fields.

Kanatash: Gah! The Purple Demon! Nooooooooo!!!!

Lisa: And no one can peek. :P
rampant

09-22-06, 12:14 PM		Forbes - Pounds!! do you know what that kind of coin could get me? Gold wiring is a crucial component in most modern war machines. There is a reason I use platinum currency, I literally own the mine. How much in real money? Darguun Marks man how much in Marks?

Liam - We may have a problem.

Forbes - Listen how about you translate the cost into goods and services.

Liam - hmmmmmmmmmmm.
urial angel of death

09-22-06, 12:56 PM		OOC: This occurred shortly after Nalfien, Volrath, Sarah, and Elina gave there gifts and were hugged by Serene.

Nalfien: *looks Satnak in the eyes* Do I really deserve the look just for a hug?

Volrath: No you fool!

Nalfien maintains eye contact with the Look for a whole five seconds.

Nalfien: Aaaahhh! I’ve been blinded! My eyes my eyes!
rwarner3701

09-22-06, 02:41 PM		A hamlet in the middle of nowhere in Thrane.

Five very well equipped men ride down the street towards a small town hall and jail building. They stop just outside and dismount. The sherrif/mayor/carpenter, Kent, walks out and greets them.

Kent: Welcome back to town boys, sure is nice to have the extra protection stopping by every once and awhile makes my jobs real easy when the crimanals all just want to get away from us.

Warrik (Leader of bounty hunters): Always a pleasure to stop in and get a few days rest with nothing to worry about. (turning to his men) Jayne take the horses to the stable, Vincent go make sure our rooms are ready at the tavern, Ray and Bruce go give the shop keeper our supply list so he can have it ready when we head out again. (turning back to Kent) Lets have a look at who else is being hunted in the area.

(They start walking back towards the building as the others head off in differant directions. There is a brief flash of light just as they open the door and some papers drifting to the floor right in front of the desk.)

Warrik: (placing his hand on his sword) What was that?

Kent: I'm not sure. (goes over and picks up the papers) Hmm... these are the wanted posters the merchant brough through yesterday but one is missing. It was actually a fairly large contract on some pirate captian.

Warrik: Pirates in Thane?

Kent: Sky Pirate, stole an airship or something.

Warrik: Darn probably wouldn't be too difficult once we got on board just catch him in his sleep and jump off the ship in the middle of the night. Oh well, lets see what else you have.

----
Back on the Forgotten Freedom

Michael: So captain with all the stunts you have pulled through the years have many bounty hunters come after you?

Jarlot: There have been a few but not nearly as many as I expected. Now everyone knows better, but in the early years there were so few it was like noone wanted to go through the trouble of getting to an airship just for a bounty.

Michael: Maybe it wasn't worth it, cost of magic and everything to get up here and back down.

Jarlot: No I saw some of the posters it was a rather lage amount of money plenty to pay the expenses and then some, not to mention the list of transgrestions that had to be continued on the back.

Michael: Must have just been lucky, some god of drunken fools watching over you.

Jarlot: Yeah... wait what?

Michael: Oh nothing (under his breath) should have mutinied when I had the chance before the Ubers started showing up.

Jarlot: I heard that.

Michael: Heard what?

Jarlot: ...well I heard something just not what you said.

Michael: Must have been the fountian of booze behind you turning on.

Jarlot: The what?

(Jarlot turns to look and sees nothing then turns back to Michael)

Jarlot: Weren't you supposed to run away while I was distracted?

Michael: Yeah I guess so I just couldn't belive you looked... or that you missed the hot sunbathers streched out on the deck.

(Jarlot turns again, sees nothing again, and turns back... again. This time Michael is gone although laughter can be heard faintly from on the the stairs leading below deck)
Gladius_Lucix

09-22-06, 02:57 PM		Forbes - Pounds!! do you know what that kind of coin could get me? Gold wiring is a crucial component in most modern war machines. There is a reason I use platinum currency, I literally own the mine. How much in real money? Darguun Marks man how much in Marks?

Liam - We may have a problem.

Forbes - Listen how about you translate the cost into goods and services.

Liam - hmmmmmmmmmmm.
Liam: Wait, Platinum could work. A tenth of the weight I said in platinum should be just as good. I only said gold because that's the standard currency here. Does that work for you?
rampant

09-22-06, 03:02 PM		Forbes - 20 pounds he says! You son of a drunk camel!! 5 pounds thief.

----------------------------

OOC: This is how Forbes haggles. Lots of insults, food, and booze.
Gladius_Lucix

09-22-06, 03:13 PM		Liam: For the components for the Weirsan Converter, I can't go any lower, so we better be simply determining my fee. And any lower than 15 pounds would simply be an amazing deal. Don't forget that I'm the only one that can build this, and this also includes the lifetime warantee.
Lord Kale Fangblade

09-22-06, 04:17 PM		On the message board is pinned a new note, written in flowing letters and pinned to the wall with a dagger (like most of the notices). it reads,

Dear crew of the forgotten freedom.

Due to recent circumstances i have decided that i need some space away from the excitement and madness of the forgotten freedom. I belive it would do me some good to visit a few places i havnt seen i a long time, as well as meet up with some old contacts and clear my head a little.

if your wondering why i have left behind all of my equipment, Including my armour behind then it is due to the fact that i will be required to be inconspicous. i would like to state that under no circumstances should ANY of you follow me ( Especialy unexistant entities).

Yours Sincerly
Sa'vor Brokenblade D'vol

PS. i appologise to Kanatash, Caralot, Serene and Satnak that i was not able to stay the full duration of their wedding. Hopefully i will be able to bring back from these journeys as well as a refreshed mind some gifts for all of you.

****

Sa'vor strode across the waste lands. now he wore simple darkweave travelling cloths, a dark cloak and about his waist a bag of spell components.
About him a gentle ethreal breeze blew. he raise a hand and muttered a simple encantation and vanished.

around him the void of the plane of shadows flowed and danced, his vision cut easily through the darkness. the scars from the Forgotten Freedoms visit where still visible on the land, Sa'vor noticed that several creatures skittered away from him as he walked. he smiled slightly, at least the memory of thier last visit had taught creatures the price of attacking people like him.
Sa'vor strode down a path, his mind began to wander and brought up painful memories... some old, some not so old. Sa'vor felt the old rage beat in his chest. He continued down the road until he reached what on this plane mirrored sharns towers... though unlike the material plane these where not rubble from the countless times the crew had leveled it, nor where any of them beautiful to most human eyes. they where dark and brooding things, twisted mockeries of the material world.

Sa'vor moved amung the empty and silent streets. at the corners of his vision shadowy beings flitted two and frow, Sa'vor reached out with his mind and felt the familiar thrumming of mental activity. he waited and turned, his curved Double Bladed scimitar like mindblade pressed against the neck of a lithe Fey, the fey's eyes became wide as he stared at the blade.

Sa'vor: its impolite to stare.

the fey said nothing, he was attempting to keep his breathing steady, but of course the panic showed in his eyes.

Sa'vor: *loudly and clearly* and all you others hideing in the buildings come out now. otherwise i'll enact tourtures beyond your imagination on this youngling.

Slowly many grey skinned humanoids left the buidlings, they where slightly taller than average humans and their movements where uncannily silent.
Sa'vors pinpointed each and everyone of their locations, if it would come to a fight, he'd turn as many of them into ashes as he could. A imperious woman stepped out from the large crowd that surrounded Sa'vor.

Yanna: What do you want elf?

Sa'vor noted how she put as much distain as she could into the last few sylables.

his eyes locked on her, he pressed his mind blade a little more into the young ones throat, causing a trickle of blood to run down his chest.

Sa'vor: I would be careful how you adress me, though i doubt you actualy care about the waste of flesh that is here, i believe you are intending to try and mug me for any wealth i have and hang me. which i belive would be extremly stupid.

Yana: Oh? and why would that be? theres eighty of us and only one of you

Sa'vor: *smileing a fanged smile* I lady have walked the battle fields of Shavarath splattered in the blood of Balors. i have gone toe to toe with the most powerful beings on these planes and fought alongside the mighty breaker Satnak. I think a mere eighty Shadar-Kai are none of my concern.

Yana paled slightly at Satnaks metion. Sa'vor smiled a bit more, so news of her has spread further than i thought.

Yana: you travel on the forgotten freedom?

Sa'vor: for a while

Yana: then whom would you be?

Sa'vor: * another vampiric smile and an evil glint in his eyes* lets just say that im powerful enough to turn you and all that you would consider to be deadly warriors and spellcasters into mere ashes as well as vapourising half of this city.

Yana: hmm, you're quite tall for an elf i admit, but you dont look like one of the ubers.

Sa'vor: *smile fades* oh?

Yana: all of the ubers dress in extremly fine clothing and armour and radiate a aura of power more imense than anything thats walked these planes.

Sa'vor: *anger in his voice* Dont you know who i am?

Yana: your probably one of the scum, perhaps maybe Micheal?

Sa'vor: *shakeing with rage* You dare to compare me to that ... That Drunkard! I am an elf ! not some scumbag human.I'll have you know i am Sa'vor! I am he whom walks both the land of living and dead! he whom wells with more power burning in his viens that any of you could ever dream of!

Yana: your not Sa'vor! He wears armour as black as the voids, his eyes are completly white rather than your orbs of neon green, his face is covered in scars and he would not be foolish enough to dress as a simple traveller.

Sa'vor snarled with rage and rammed his mindblade through the younglings throat, he withdrew it and brought the second blade in a sweeping arc to cut down a warrior before he could draw a weapon. Sa'vor moved like a dancer, weaving, ducking, dodgeing his blade moving like a blur. soon all but Yana where dead.

Sa'vors clothing was splatterd with blood, his mind blade dripped crackled in yearning to spill more blood.

Sa'vor: any doubts now?
Sa'vor sent an eldrich blast at her before she could speak. she was knocked back and crumpled against the base of a tower.
Sa'vors mindblade vanished and he sighed slightly and walked off.

Sa'vor: How can anyone compare me to micheal? i dont even look like him
urial angel of death

09-22-06, 04:40 PM		OOC: I would just like to state that when around normal people Volrath usually dresses in rather plain clothing. True that lady probably wouldn't know that, but I just wanted to clear things up in case.
rampant

09-22-06, 04:45 PM		Forbes - You are really bad at this.

Liam - huh?

Forbes - Your supposed to charge me an unbelievable sum, while I offer a pittance, some trash talk, a little rum, we come to an agreement thats about fair. Get your sales rep in here.
-----------------------------------

Tirmek - If your that curious I'll tell you what I know.

Kratwe - (i.h.h. point 1 he's an arrogant punk, point 2 his arrogance is justified, point 3 he knows it, point 4 Satnak's nephew) Fine what is it?

Tirmek - No Clue, I do know SHE is capable of assuming most any insect or arachnid form. I think she could do just about any arthropod, but that her exposure is limited by what she can find on this ship. I know she is the direct result of a union of Deva and Succubus. I think the conflicting energies may have something to do with her lack of either angelic or fiendish traits.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-22-06, 05:12 PM		Kratwe: But what about these two? *points at Sarah and Elina*

Elina: What about us?

Kratwe: You don't display any overt fiendish traits, and as far as I know, you show no signs of angelic traits. Are the seals really that powerful?

Sarah: Yeah. We get the outsider traits from Mom, and she got them in a way that hasn't really changed her regular appearance much. Her natures have been brought into alignment, so they don't cancel each other out.

Tirmek: The energies around her are absolutely fascinating. I get less of it from these two, but it's still there.

Kratwe: So, what happens when the seals fade?

Sarah: No one really knows. We're the first of our kind.

Elina: :D I hope I get wings! :D Mom's are so cool!

Kratwe: :confused: Wait...since when has she had wings? I don't see any...

Tirmek: She can hide them if she chooses. If you don't believe us, just ask her.

Sarah: Wings can only add to my adorableness. :D

Tirmek: :nonono:
rampant

09-22-06, 05:30 PM		Chalky - Can't catch me!

Feal'thas - You exploded a pink paint bomb in his room you little trouble maker.

Chalky - :evillaugh :evillaugh
Crystalforged

09-22-06, 08:54 PM		OOC: Alrighty then. I suppose I should get going with the wedding now since the week is done and I've finally got all my exams taken care of. More importantly because I don't like the way Kanatash has started fondeling that whip...



OOCrystalforged: So, what do I still have to do for the wedding?

Kanatash: Hm, Volrath is doing the ceremony from the texts of the Great Old Ones and I've got a nice area picked out on the Glass Platue in the Mournlands for the site.

OOCrystalforged: Well, what about bridesmaids and best man?

Kanatash: Well Caralot should choose the bridesmaids of course and I was thinking of having Volrath's father as bestman.

OOCrystalforged: Well Caralot's father is sure to be giving her away, buy the way whatever happened to your parents?

Kanatash: I had them "liquidated."

OOCrystalforged: Wait, I thought you said you couldn't bring yourself to kill them?

Kanatash: Well I couldn't for the longest time but when I saw Kithle going all Magnificent Bastard on those hippies I got this warm, fuzzy feeling inside of me. I think that was a part of my soul dying. After that it just wasn't a problem anymore.

OOCrystalforged: Okydoky, ringbearer and flower girl. I belive Elina and Sarah were nominated for the posts.

Kanatash: Yeah, but they already did Satnak and Serene's wedding. I was thinking about Nemesis as the Flower Girl.

OOCrystalforged: I half expected you to pick Dooj.

Kanatash: I thought about it, but it was already done once and you know I hate repeating these tricks.

OOCrystalforged: That leaves ringbearer.

Kanatash: Hmmmmmm, tough decision. I honestly don't know, worst case scenario I can always use Pikaman or a soul snuggle.

OOCrystalforged: So is there anyone left to invite then?

Kanatash: Well, all of Caralot's side is here and there are a few people from Xoriat I need to bring in, including Volrath's father, but other than that I think we're good.

OOCrystalforged: What about Krozen?

Kanatash: I'll make him part of the honeymoon.

OOCrystalforged: Speaking of which I've got some plans for that, and even bigger plans for afterward. *cue insane laugh (Cypher knows what I'm talking about ;) )*
rampant

09-22-06, 09:53 PM		Levy - (looks at Lady, looks at kanatash and Caralot, Looks at pregnant Marish, Looks at Serene) How many kids are you putting through school?

Satnak - As many who want to.
urial angel of death

09-22-06, 09:54 PM		Nalfien has finally let Krozen out of the steam bath.

Krozen: Thank you kind sir. How can I ever repay... It's you! :eek:

Nalfien: :D plane shift.

Krozen appears in front of a huge set of music symbols.

voice: Hello boys and girls.

Krozen: Who are you? Show your self!

Voice: Oh me I'm Mr.

A music note disappears and in its place appears a slightly feminine looking figure.

Figure: "B" Natural!

OOC: This is a MST3K refrence. For those that have seen it please tell me what is your opinion on Mr. "B" Natural. Was it naturally a man or a woman?
Rei32491

09-22-06, 11:12 PM		OOC: This is a MST3K refrence. For those that have seen it please tell me what is your opinion on Mr. "B" Natural. Was it naturally a man or a woman? Mr. B Natural is a sexless man-woman.:D
rampant

09-23-06, 01:21 AM		Satnak - Ok people We need toget moving.

Serene - Time to go aleady?

Satnak - Gotta be on time or they might bump us down a room, there are only so many honeymoon suites. If we're even a little late we might get bumped to the normal rooms.

Serene - Alright, ah heres the boquet.

NJ26 readies a shuriken barrage, Mendova hefts a table, Kratwe readies both tentacle whips and prepares a telekinetic pull. SJ does her Magical girl transformation, and JJ Switches in an ultraflash bulb.

Sere Hefts the Green Roses up and over the whirling mass of female fury towards Caralot still trying to fend off a drunk crystal ooze-person.

13 - Well thats a big duh.

Caralot ducks a lashing pseudopod and the roses clock Kanatash who was trying to physically remove Disarray using his corporeal time for the day.

Silver - I know something you don't know.:D

Satnak - :evillaugh

Guys - (i.t.h. if she does throw a garter chances are it'll try to kill me, or she'll succeed) uhhhhhhhhh *anime sweat drop*

In a movement too quick for even Levy or Forbes to quite catch, a lacy circle is in the air.
---------------------------------

OOC: I'll let someone else decide who's brave enough to make a stab at it.
----------------------------------

Serene - This is so amazing!

Satnak - You have wings of your own you know.

Serene - I can't fly this High or this far. Whats amazing is this view.

Satnak - The frostfell is largely untouched by the war. Even the Scavengers don't come up here. Too cold, remote, and lacking in military value. The resort up here is amazing.

Serene - I can't wait to get you in our room.:angelhide

Satnak - :blush: :cloud9:
-----------------------------------------
Fluffy sees a piece of paper left on his bed.

Fluffy - Meowor (whats this)

When opened it reads:

Dear Fluffy,

Well normally I'd be mad that you made me a grandma before I was 40, but your an adult cat and I like your mate.
You surprised me so this note is alot shorter that it probably should be. Besides I'm not very good at this stuff. This is Serene's thing. I'm glad you two aren't fighting anymore, I love you both and couldn't stand it much longer. Anyway heres the list.

Rip - That little grey-green male with the white streaks that look like scars in his fur.

Tear - The female with the green tiger pattern.

Shred - The large solid greenish white female.

Mittens - The grey green male with the white front paws.

Love,
-Mommy
cypher_zero

09-23-06, 02:05 AM		OOC: Couldn't wait to get going could ya? S'alright, I was takin to long as usual. Also, just so you know, Serene can probably fly higher and faster than Satnak. She’s got a fly speed of 120 ft, perfect maneuverability. See Terrek's wiki. Anways…

IC:

Serene and Satnak arrive at the hotel without incident and make their way up to their honeymoon suite - Serene carrying Satnak.

Satnak: Explain why I’m letting you carry me?

Serene: Because, silly girl, you *huff* flew us here. It’s my turn to carry you.

They arrive at the door and it opens automatically sensing their presence. Serene sets Satnak down and both begin looking around the room.

Serene: Wow… You really went all out on this.

Satnak: Well, I wanted -

Satnak spots Terrek standing with his back to them, facing out the window.

Satnak: What are you doing here!? :mad:

Terrek looks over his shoulder and smiles slyly.

Terrek: You two made a fairly quick getaway at the reception. I didn’t even get time to make a toast.

Satnak: Well we wanted to get going. This suite wasn’t cheap you know. So what do you want?

Terrek: Calm yourself Daughter, I –

Satnak: Daughter?! :confused:

Terrek: … Of course. You are my daughter-in-law now. I will treat you as such.

Serene: So what did you need Father? We were kind of hoping to get away from everyone for a little while…

Terrek: (smiling) Yes, I’ll not keep you too long on your wedding night, however, there is a matter of importance that you will need to attend to.

Satnak: Which is?

Terrek: Well Satnak, or should I say Princess Satnak – :smirk:

Satnak: Princess!? :blink:

Terrek: Of course. You just married my daughter, married royalty. You are now a Princess of my realm. This means that you will have to be introduced to the populace. I’ll be holding a banquet in your honor, both of you that is, to celebrate the wedding and introduce you to the people of Teseris. Serene knows how to get you both there. Come when you are ready, but don’t tarry too long. I can only mess with the flow of time so much before… unpleasant things begin happening to it.

Serene: But…

Terrek: I understand that you wish some time to yourselves after the wedding, but it is your duty as a princess. I will expect you within the next two weeks as time flows here. Oh, and congratulations. I expect grandkids sometime soon…

Serene & Satnak: :embarrass :blush:

Terrek: Till then… (teleport)

Satnak: Huh, didn’t see that coming…

Serene: Neither did I… But maybe we could get a head start on the last bit? :schemes:

Satnak: :embarrass :blush:
.
rampant

09-23-06, 02:33 AM		OOC: Satnak can boost her speed with melds and powers not to mention her ectocarnum wings never tire.
-------------------------------------------

Satnak - Let me get some ice cubes.

Serene - What:confused: ...Oh:schemes:
cypher_zero

09-23-06, 02:34 AM		OOC: Serene is a living construct. She NEVER tires. :schemes:
.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-23-06, 02:42 AM		"My character's more uber!"

"No, mine!"

"No-"

Etc. ad infinitum. Enough already. If it makes good story...WHO CARES?!
cypher_zero

09-23-06, 03:03 AM		OOC: Um... I wasn't trying to 1 up Rampant. The last bit was inuendo. Sorry you didn't catch it.
.
rampant

09-23-06, 03:20 AM		OOC: Sorry
---------------------

Reception dwarf - hows things Bjorn

Bjorn (bell dwarf) - Those two in the honeymoon suite 3, hehehe.... I've never heard o' anyone using that much ice! And Don't start me on the food.

Reception Dwarf - Ok I wont.

Bjorn - 6 turkeys! and that be for the tall one! The Smaller Lass eats a bit for a human her size, but nothing I've never seen before.

Reception Dwarf - They're both half-elves Bjorn.

Bjorn - How am supposed to know that!? I cannae see them ears from down here.

Reception Dwarf - Have they Left their room yet the cleaning crew is getting nervous.

Bjorn - Aye, they jus' headed out for the private hotsprings. I swear they're spending like Darguun Marks is just dirt to them.

Reception Dwarf - The tall one is pulling strings apparently she's breaker prime.

Bjorn - Well I'll be... I gotta go tell me brotter Wulf. He was dere fer the time she wronked them dragon raiders.

Reception Dwarf - Calm down Bjorn I can't understand a word you say with that accent of yours. I swear you spend too much time with those bloody nutters gnomes.
cypher_zero

09-23-06, 04:48 AM		OOC: So what's the deal with the ice cubes?
.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-23-06, 07:53 AM		OOC: I'll let someone else decide who's brave enough to make a stab at it.
A white blur streaks through the air, leaping several feet to catch the garter before it even has a chance to get to the top of its arc. Upon landing the blur reveals itself to be the wolf form of Weylin, holding the garter in his mouth and looking around expectantly, as if simply a dog playing a game of fetch.

Caralot: Well good for him………………(whispered) Kanatash, what does catching the garter mean?

OOC: I really have no idea what it means.
Also:
Silver - I know something you don't know. :D
I'm stumped.
rampant

09-23-06, 10:50 AM		OOC: Its supposed to bring good luck and depending on where you are, it may also carry the same significance as when one of the girls catches to boquet. As for silver you should have figured it out when Kanatash got whammied by the flowers.
--------------------------------------------

Satnak - Oooooooh this is nice.

Serene - you say we have this to ouselves?:devil:

Satnak - Your insatiable you know that.

Serene - Ditch the swimsuit.

Satnak - Yes maam.:cloud9:
Crystalforged

09-23-06, 11:51 AM		I'm stumped.
OOC: :smirk: Oh I know what it means, but I'm not saying. Rampant just happens to have a better memory apparently. Oh and on the subject of Rampant, (smacks him with newspaper) Bad Entity! No hints!
rampant

09-23-06, 12:09 PM		OORampant - Thats it Get your costume and lets settle this like geeks.

Announcer - Mewtwo vs.
-------------------------------------

Serene - Satnak what are you doing with that tail?:cloud9: ooooh
--------------------------

Later

Serene - Wow:)

Satnak - Yeah:embarrass thats definetly going in the book.

Serene - We probably better take care of things with dad.

Satnak - I guess your right its been a week. (I.h.h. and I need rest)
urial angel of death

09-23-06, 04:06 PM		Mewtwo vs _ vs Ridley.

OOUrial: Hey these things are fun don't leave me out.
Crystalforged

09-23-06, 04:42 PM		OORampant - Thats it Get your costume and lets settle this like geeks.

Announcer - Mewtwo vs. (I.h.h. and I need rest)
OOCrystalforged: Hm, how about...

Announcer: SAMUS.

OOCrystalforged: (now carrying a nice big boomstick) Oh and I brought company...

Kanatash: (wearing a red baseball cap) PK Fire!

OORampant: Two against one? Isn't that a little unfair?

OOCrystalforged: One, who said anything about fighting fair? Two, after all the **** I put him through on this thread I'll be lucky if he doesn't stab me in the back.
rampant

09-23-06, 04:48 PM		Kanatash (ness) - I'd never do that. PK thunder is so much more fun.:D

OORampant - *kick*

OOUrial - The announcer didn't say go yet.

OOCrystalforged - MY NOSE YOU BASTARD!.

OORampant - Since when have I played fair?
--------------------------------------------------------

Serene - Hmmm, maybe one more go before we check in with father.

Satnak - *anime sweat drop* Can I eat something first?

Serene - You've been scarfing down whole turkeys all week!!

Satnak - You keep wearing me out you crazy little dynamo.

Serene - Hehe, no excuses get over here silly girl.

Satnak - :cloud9:
urial angel of death

09-23-06, 07:11 PM		OOC: So is it 2vs2 or 2vs1vs1?
Kaizer_Ryu

09-23-06, 07:25 PM		*HAIL OF ARROWS*

All: Holy crap! *dodge*

OOKaizer: *as Link* You didn't think I'd sit this one out, did you? :D

OOUrial: What about OORei?

OORei: *from behind OOKaizer* FLARE BLADE!

He misses badly as OOKaizer dodges and chucks a bomb at him.

OOKaizer: What about him? :P

OOUrial: Is that the only move he can use?

OOKaizer: By watching him play, you'd think that's the only move Roy knows. :rolleyes:

OORei: *still slightly singed* :mad: It's the only move Roy needs. Everything else is just icing on the cake.

Kanatash: PK Thunder!

OORei: Ahhhhh!!!
rampant

09-23-06, 07:29 PM		Announcer - Free for all GO!
----------------------------------------

Satnak - *heffheff* I think that was the best yet.

Serene - I didn't know you could do that.

Satnak - Its the only time I ever needed to bend that way.

Serene - Well we need to clean up.

Satnak - Yeah The sooner we deal with your dad, the sooner we get back to our honey moon.
urial angel of death

09-23-06, 07:35 PM		OOUrial: Samus, I will defeat you this time.

OOCrystal: And how did that work for you last time oh yeah slaughtered. :D

OOUrial: If I recall correctly you had an infinate number of tries where as I was gone if I died even once.

OOCrystal: Your point?

OOUrial: This time you can't start over and this time you are fighting more than just me. :D

OOCrystal is hit by a psychic in the back, and sent across the screen.

Announcer: Fatality!

OORampant: Thanks for destracting him

OOUrial: No problem.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-23-06, 07:42 PM		Silver: :eek:

Bunny: *tap, tap*

Silver: :eek:

Bunny: Huh, they broke Silver.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-23-06, 07:48 PM		*Hook Shot*

OOUrial: :eek:

OOKaizer: I shall now unleash Link's extensive vocabulary upon you!

OOUrial: Uh-oh...

OOKaizer: HEYAH! HA! HUA! EIGH! HEH! WAH! YAHHH!!!

OOUrial: *in unison* OW! AH! OOF! UGH! OUCH! GAH! AAAAHHH!

OOKaizer: :D *whirlwind attack*

OOUrial: Ohcrapohcrapohcrap...almost back to the edge...

*Hook Shot*

OOUrial: :mad: I loathe you...

OOKaizer: :P *whirlwind attack*

Announcer: K.O.!
urial angel of death

09-23-06, 08:01 PM		OOUrial respawns and grabs a descending smash token.

OOKaizer: Oh ****!

OORei: MetaRidley!

OOKaizer is hit by a barrage of missles.

OOKaizer: Almost there *whirlwind*

OOUrial: *Plasma Breath*

OOKaizer: You suc-

Annoucer: K.O.!
Kaizer_Ryu

09-23-06, 08:11 PM		Kanatash: PK Thunder! (for the 30th time)

OORei: AHHHH!!! :headexplo That DOES it! *FLARE BLADE*

Kanatash: :D Worth it!

Announcer: K.O.!

OORei: :pbbbtt:

OOCrystalforged: *Charge Shot*

OORei: Son of a-!

Announcer: K.O.!

OOKaizer respawns, grabs another Smash Token, and begins glowing awesomely. (it's Twilight Princess Link, how can he not be cool?)

OOCrystalforged: *anime sweatdrop*

OOKaizer: :D *extreme swordplay badassness*

Announcer: K.O.!
Rei32491

09-23-06, 08:30 PM		The participants are locked in fierce combat as a large airship flies overhead. A metal masked knight with a flowing black cape and a giant sword steps out and leaps to the field.

Nalfein: Behold! I am MetaKnight!

OORei: *respawning* ...isn't that a little small for you?

Nalfein: I shrunk myself.

OORei: Into a sphere with stubbly little arms that can somehow hold on to a sword three times your size?

Nalfein: Shut up.
Crystalforged

09-23-06, 08:58 PM		OOCrystalforged: (respawn) Two can play at that game. (grabs another convienently appearing smash tolken)

Samus begins glowing as well, tranforming into phazon suit Samus, in hyper mode.

OOCrystalforged: Suck Phazon beam, *****. (pauses) By the way, you don't have the mirror shield yet do you?

OOKaizer: :mymy: No.

OOCrystalforged: :evillaugh I thought not. (releases massive energy blast)

Announcer: KO!

OOCrystalforged: That was cool but doing anthing to harm, even in my own imagination, Twilight Princess Link makes me feel somehow... dirty...

---

OORampant: Now let's end this.

OOCrystalforged: Bring it.

OORampant launches a Shadow Ball while OOCrystalforged unleashes another charge shot. Both meet in mid air, creating a massive explosing which tosses both character's back.

OORampant: (rising) That was impressive. Now what happened to- SWEET JAELA MY EYES!

The blast has reduced OOCrystalforged to zero suit samus, complete with skin tight short shorts.

OOCrystalforged: I may have just discovered the ultimate weapon.

OORampant: :twitch: I'm just going to jump off the legde now and hope the resulting knock out is enought to make me black out and remove these images from my mind.

Announcer: KO!

OOCrystalforged: (streaking across the stage) WHOO HOO!

---

Kanatash: (looking on) Only my entity.

OORei: Yep.

Kanatash: Oh by the way, PK Flash!

OORei: I hate you.

Announcer: KO!
urial angel of death

09-23-06, 09:11 PM		OOC: I have a wanted post for Volrath but I have nowhere to host it :(
rampant

09-23-06, 10:17 PM		OORampant - (respawns) Hehe Bunny ears and tiny'shroom I'm a freaky little hyper ninja!

Grabs a lightsaber and leaps into the fray once more.
----------------------------------------------

Satnak - Ok thats everything cleaned up and put away.

Serene - I'm so excited I get to show you off to everyone back home. I have this little red number you'd look amazing in.:D

Satnak - Why does this make me nervous?
Kaizer_Ryu

09-23-06, 10:17 PM		OOCrystalforged: Woooooooo!!!

*Double-bladed Scimitar attack*

Announcer: K.O.!

Terra: *as Pit* Such a showoff...

OOKaizer: Nice of you to join us. I thought you'd pick Zelda.

Terra: I thought about it, but then that'd essentially make me your girlfriend. Since you're my creator, it was a bit too icky for my tastes.

Lisa: *Marth* Armor's a little tight, but not too shabby.

Nalfein: DIE, ANGEL!

Terra: Bring it, punk!

*MASSIVE SWORD FIGHT*
urial angel of death

09-23-06, 10:44 PM		OOC: Found a host site :D
here it is Volrath's Wanted Poster (http://static.flickr.com/114/250946856_b3480e324d.jpg?v=0)

Charles I hope you understand the joke in the image after all you inspired it.

IC: Volrath appears in front of Nalfien in flashier clothing than usual.

Nalfien: He was never in a Nintendo game!

Volrath: So?

Nalfien: Have at you!

Volrath: Bring it Dragon Orb!

Nalfien: Aaaaahhhhhh!

Announcer: K.O.!
luna18moon

09-23-06, 11:26 PM		OOC::( These are the times when I wish I've played Super Smash Bros. more. I've only played 2 rounds in my life tops :raincloud . Nice names, everyone! I really liked Rip, Tear, Shred, and Mittens, though. These little guys will probably wreak havoc when they grow up :D .
Crystalforged

09-23-06, 11:38 PM		While I, and I'm willing to bet plenty of others here, think it's a great game even if you'd never played it it wouldn't be all that hard to get in on whats going on now. After all the basic concept is nothing more than a whole bunch of nintendo characters getting together and beating the tar out of each other. You could pick a character, and we're not even being all that faithful to the "nintendo" part, and join the fray with no problems if you wanted.
luna18moon

09-23-06, 11:54 PM		can I pick a manga character, or would that be stretching it?
I know about the game, it's just I decided I wouldn't get it unless I got a new controller, and I haven't gotten around to it yet.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 12:09 AM		OOC: I have no idea what Pit's or MetaKnight's super moves will be, so I'm gonna just make them up.

IC:

OORei: HA!

Lisa: *jump dodge*

OORei: Dammit! Why won't you frigging stop jumping?!

Lisa: :P Because it annoys you. *Dolphin Strike*

OORei: *parry X 4* Nice tr-

*Plasma Breath*

OORei: Cheap shot!

Lisa: So mean!

Announcer: Double K.O.!

OOUrial: :D

A hail of arrows strikes OOUrial and explodes in a fireball, followed by a whirlwind of blade strikes and a smash attack that sends him flying.

OOUrial: :eek: WTF?!

Announcer: K.O.!

Terra: I call it: Heaven's Vengeance. :P

Nalfein: *respawns* BANZAI!!!!

Terra: :eek: *parry*

*insert cool sword fight*

Nalfein: *Grabs a smash token* "Vengeance is mine!" quoth Alvis!

*Knights Wrath* *full blade dual wielding awesomeness*

Terra: But he's a weak little Wizard!

Announcer: Ouch...uh, I mean: K.O.!

Kanatash: PK Flash!

Nalfein: Oh, come o-!

Announcer: K.O.!
Crystalforged

09-24-06, 12:10 AM		You ask that like you're worried about breaking some sort of rule. Remember where you are, we don't just say that rules are made to be broke, we deny they existed in the first place. Not to mention as far as I can tell Volrath has shown up as himself.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 12:14 AM		OOC: Volrath is some guy from Valkyrie Profile. I never played it ( :weep: ), so I think Volrath should at least tell us who he is...

BTW, is the re-release of VP out yet? I haven't heard anything new since I found out it was coming back. I wanna play...
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 12:19 AM		Volrath: I am Loki. Indiscriminate

All the contestants are hit by successive blasts of fire, lightning, ice, and holy energy.

Announcer: Multi K.O.

OOC: Have a final boss transfered to SSB without powering down cause much pwnage. Who is Lisa? VP's prequel is on PS2 and its rerelease is on the PSP. Greatest game on earth worst system on earth.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 12:26 AM		OOC: She's Marth. You remember how much Rei hates the jumpy little bastard. :D

IC:

OOKaizer: Ok, if Loki gets to come in without a powerdown, then SO DOES LINK!

All: :eek: NOOOOOOOOO! ARE YOU MAD?!?!?!

Volrath: For the love of all that is unholy, don't do it! You'll break the game!

OOKaizer: Then tone him down a little. At best, you can use that total cheapness as a super move.

Volrath: ...fine.

OOC: It's on the PSP?! :raincloud
luna18moon

09-24-06, 12:31 AM		OOC: Good point.
OOluna arrives. She looks something like this (http://ceo-bcn.upc.es/pase/hack/imagenes/ouka.gif), only with a large gold bracelet.
OOluna: DATA DRAIN!
All the other players are surrounded by light and turn into scarecrows.
OOluna: Time to cull the herd :devil: .
CENSORED FOR VIOLENCE
Announcer: OCTUPLE K.O.!
OOC: Ouka with Shugo's bracelet. Sweetness.:devil:
:cookie: if you know the manga.
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 12:37 AM		OOC: That wasn't even his strongest move :D In all actuallity it targets a random number of characters and I was just trying to say he got lucky. His strongest is dragon orb which up until this time he only used on Nalfien. Though dragon orb would make a god supermove and due to its randomness Indiscriminate probably wouldn't be included. Just worth noting even Link at full power probably couldn't take him down. His defense is so high that only one party member can hurt him with physical attacks and even with her it was only a very little bit. Then again his M def is rather weak. So Link would just have to call up his girlfriend for help. :D

On a related note Kaizer is going to kill me for suggesting Link could be defeated.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 12:42 AM		OOC: I'm pretty sure it's (dot)Hack. Do I get a cookie now?

And urial, this is LINK we're talking about. He wields the Master Sword, bane of evil and a magic blade. :P Besides, need I remind you that this is Twilight Princess Link? Have you seen the trailers? If he's even half as badass as depicted in them, OoT Link will have to move to second in my rankings of favorite Links. :D

IC:

Terra: I find myself strangely attracted to the wolf-girl.

Lisa: *thump* All you had to do was suggest it. You know I'd oblige.

Terra: *holding her head* I was kidding...but I'll keep it in mind :devil: .

Lisa: :embarrass

OOKaizer: *locked in mortal combat with Nalfein* Not here, dammit!

Terra & Lisa: *anime sweatdrop* Sorry!
rampant

09-24-06, 12:42 AM		OORampant - Missed me!

Volrath - Oh no:weep:

A flurry of leaps, lightsaber blows, and dodges later.

OORampant - Eat Saber Punk. *throws light saber*

Volrath - *jump*

OORampant -*charge psychic*

Volrath - Jerkwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad

Announcer - K.O.!

Dew-dew-dew

OORampant - Aw fug my ears and mini'shroom just wore off didn't they?
-------------------------------

Satnak - *sigh*

Serene - You sound impatient.

Satnak - I need to get this thing with your old man out of the way I snagged tickets to a big party tomorrow night.

Serene - Oh what kind of party?

Satnak - Dance, I'm better at this kind of dancing than ballroom.

Serene - Hmmmmm, I think I might have something in my old closet for us to wear to that.

Satnak - Do you have a whole wardrobe for me in there or something?

Serene - Maaaaaaybe:D

Satnak - I bet half of it is fetish outfits.

Serene - Of course not! (i.h.h. more like 3/4's)
----------------------------------
OOC: .hack//Legend of the Twilight, .hack// had the original .hackers. Also she's a wolf-girl.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 12:50 AM		OOC: .hack//Legend of the Twilight, .hack// had the original .hackers. Also she's a wolf-girl.
Ah. I haven't read the whole thing. I guess that means rampant gets the cookie :raincloud . I'll change it. It actually works better, since Lisa's part (dormant) werewolf...
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 12:54 AM		Volrath respawns

Volrath: You die for that Icicle Edge!

Blades of ice squewer (sp) OORampant

Volrath: Shadow Servent

Three shadow creatures race toward OORampant and throw him into the air and off the screen.

Announcer: K.O.

-------

OOUrial: Oh no my damage percent is really high. *drain attack*

OOLuna's damage percent sky rockets as OOUrial's declines.

OOLuna: You little.

OOUrial: *flies away* sorry miss (Luna if you are male I apology in advance)
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 12:57 AM		And urial, this is LINK we're talking about. He wields the Master Sword, bane of evil and a magic blade. :P Besides, need I remind you that this is Twilight Princess Link? Have you seen the trailers? If he's even half as badass as depicted in them, OoT Link will have to move to second in my rankings of favorite Links. :D


It may be a magic sword but it is still physical damage by game mechanics and seeing Link beat by a little kid only to be saved by Zelda is the most hilarious metal image ever.
rampant

09-24-06, 12:57 AM		OORampant - Hehehehehehehehe:evillaugh :evillaugh :evillaugh :evillaugh

*picks up superscope*

EAT 30 MEGAWATT PLASMA BLASTS SUCKERS!!!. I'M GOING CAPTAIN SNES ON ALLLLLLLLLL YOUR BUTTS NOW!

Everyone else - RUN FOR THE HILLS!
Crystalforged

09-24-06, 02:09 AM		OOCrystalforged: Meh. (picks of kanatash and uses him as a human shield just as OORampant is about to fire)

Kanatash: PSI Magnet!

Kanatash absorbes the shot and reduces his damage precentage to zero.

Kanatash: Yea!

OOCrystalforged: Super Missle.

Kanatash: NO!

Announcer: KO!

OOCrystalforged: Really that thing is overrated. It's way too easy to block or avoid and it leaves you wide open when you're charging it.

OORampant: Oh yeah? Dodge this! (fires again)

OOCrystalforged: :bored: Sigh, so predictable. (gets blasted to kingdom come)

Announcer: KO!

OORampant: :confused: That was an odd reaction.

Voice: Not really. I was getting bored with samus and I just wanted an excuse to respawn in as a new character.

OORampant turns to see OOCrystalforged who now appears as a pale, white haired youth dressed entirely in black and carrying a silver sword.

OOCrystalforged: (draws his hand across his face) Where there is light, there is darkness... (passes through portal of silver liquid, freazing time and readies sword) Sword of the Dark moon... (slashes a dozen times across the length of the stage leaving trails of silver light in his wake faster than OORampant can blink) Silver Eclipse! (final slash sending OORampant into the next time zone)

Announcer: Ooooooh, super KO!



OOC: Kaizer should know who the character is, if not shame on him.
Charles Phipps

09-24-06, 04:07 AM		Rose: I'm sorry, I'm going to have to interrupt this.

OOKaiser: Huh?

Rose: Here is a cease and desist order from my lawyers for using Link and accompanying Legend of Zelda properties without my permission.

*affixes his little Wood Elf hat*

Zella: I'm afraid that I must too apply some legal rejoiners here.

Terra: You're just jealous that no one over fourteen doesn't graduate to Final Fantasy.

Zella: What was that? I'm sorry, I can't hear you over all the being replaced by bigger boobed and better animated girls in your series.

Terra: You *****!

Zella: Nyah! *sticks out tongue*

*cat fight ensues*

Lisa: This always happens whenever those two are alone.

rose: I like the Samus Aaron outfit.

Lisa: Thanks. Aren't you also Vampire Hunter D?

Rose: It's sort of like Yoko Hanno, I do a lot of various games.

Michael: OH MY GOD! SAMUS AARON IS A WOMAN!??
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-24-06, 08:08 AM		Crowd: Ter-ra! Ter-ra! Ter-ra! Ter-ra!

Terra: Ooooo, Zella…

Lisa: Silver! Stop messing with my wife!

Wolf-girl: Mmmmm.

Lisa: What—

Wolf-girl: *glomph*

Meanwhile everyone else is still fighting.

Announcer: K.……………uh, what are you doi—AAAAAHHHHHHH—*gurk*… *gurgle*…gaaaaaaah…an't 'reath—*slump*

Bunny Announcer: DEATH!

OOUrial: :mad: Hey, that's not fair! I'm not respawning!

Bunny Announcer: Tough. I'm getting tired of this.

OOcat: Yeah, nothing to really comment on.
rampant

09-24-06, 12:01 PM		Satnak - I'm nervous.

Serene - Your a d'Borisheel you said it your self, you come from a similar enough background.

Satnak - Thats why I'm nervous.

Serene - *kiss* Silly girl, they're nice people don't worry.

Satnak - I'll try.
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 12:14 PM		OOUrial: No respawn is just fine by me.

Space pirate lackeys rush over to OOUrial's corpse.

Space Pirate #1: We can rebuild him-

Space Pirate #2: That joke has already been over done. Just get to work.

The space pirates construct a new cybernetic body for him.

OOUrial: Now I'll always be Meta-Ridley!

OOKaizer: Fine then due to copyright violations I am no longer Link, but am in fact actual Kaizer form Ryu!

Everyone else: Oh ****!
rampant

09-24-06, 12:44 PM		OORampant - hmmmmm,...:lightbulb :evillaugh :evillaugh :evillaugh

PIcks up Nalfein and swings him around like a hammer.

Nalfein - He's lost it completely this time!!

OOLuna - Ieeeeeeeeee!

Kanatash - This is stupiiiiiiiiid!

Volrath - You Priiiiiiiiiiiiiick!

OOCrystalforged - Bugger thiiiiiiiis!

OOUrial - Diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittoooooo!

OOKaizer - Not cooooooooool!

Announcer Bunny - What the Helllllllllll?!

OORampant continues slamming nalfein into the ground until he hits a mine.

Nalfein - I Hate you alllllllll!

OORampant - Worth iiiiiiiiit!

...
...
...

Lisa - Honey

Terra - Yes dear?

Lisa - I think its over.

Terra - and?

Lisa - Nothing, where were we?
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 01:52 PM		OOC: Kaizer should know who the character is, if not shame on him. OOC: Ramirez, duh. Like I wouldn't know...

And I missed being Kaizer form Ryu. :weep: My mere appearance as such would cause much pwnage. Then I'd move and break the game completely. :D

OOKaizer: I found the fact that Terra and Zella were making out to be rather disturbing, since Terra and Rose are siblings.

Rose: She's only my half-sister.

OOKaizer: It's still icky.
rampant

09-24-06, 02:26 PM		Ketler - I don't beileve this, I finallt get this stupid thing rigged up to follow accross the portal and they're just holding each other dammit!. I can't sell this! Wait a minute, ohh crap...AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGGGGG GGG
----------------------

Kithle - Only about a week to tweak the viewer, I win Fork it over.

Kanatash - *tosses kithle a dorje of Mind Thrust* I hate you.

Kithle - *catch* Naz'roth

Naz'roth - Cheater *tosses a psionatrix for telepathy*

Kithle - All I did was fix a couple of parts, that you two broke by the way.

Naz'roth - Gah!

Kanatash - You think your so smart!
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 02:27 PM		Then Volrath would use one of the dragon orb's powers to take control of you. Of course that was prevented from happening and thus be don't live in a world ruled by Volrath. ;)
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 02:47 PM		OOKaizer: Foolish mortal! Kaizer form Ryu can never be controlled!

OOUrial: :eek: :eek: Please don't kill me Mr. Allmighty Dragon God, Lord of all Existance...

OORei: Yeah he can. Just combine the Holy and Trance Genes with the Infinity Gene.

OOKaizer: Quiet you.
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 03:03 PM		OOC: I'm sure that's like me saying that Lenneth is god and lord of all creation. Even though I'd be right my view is still tainted by fan-boyism as is your's. On a slightly related note I have a wanted poster for Nalfien if he got a tan and gained a few pounds. here (http://static.flickr.com/120/251569216_e7fc51d48b.jpg?v=0)

Also does anyone else picture Sarah as Platina (http://64.132.109.253/~ADSpace/Valkyrie%20Profile/pages/art-platinum1_jpg.htm) or Lily as Lucian (http://64.132.109.253/~ADSpace/Valkyrie%20Profile/pages/art-lucio_jpg.htm)?
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 03:15 PM		The links for Platina and Lucian don't work for me. I Googled Valkyrie Profile, and Platina does look like a less feral version of what I see Sarah as in my head. I also think that if you gave Aelie pink hair, she'd look a lot like Elina.
Crystalforged

09-24-06, 03:20 PM		OOC: :weep: Ah, it's over? I was just getting started. We really need to do this again.

Oh, by the way I can't get the two bottom links to work. Is that just me?
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 03:23 PM		OOC: They work for me. I'll try link to the page instead of the image. Kaizer isn't Aelie a bit old to be Elina? I picked Platina for Sarah, because little girls sould look completely innocent until the moment they rip your heart out. I could understand her looking more like Brahms in a fight but for everyday activity she would atleast in my mind look like a normal little girl.

Links should work now.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 03:33 PM		Kaizer isn't Aelie a bit old to be Elina?
Yeah, but Platina looks too old to be Sarah. I was talking about their faces, not their whole bodies. That would be creepy.
Charles Phipps

09-24-06, 03:35 PM		OOC: I like them both and all the new Wanted posters are very good I think.

Besides, they'll keep their baby faces for awhile...bwhahaha
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 03:36 PM		OOC: I like them both and all the new Wanted posters are very good I think.

Besides, they'll keep their baby faces for awhile...bwhahaha

Thanks :D
Charles Phipps

09-24-06, 03:39 PM		Fun filled fact. The entire campaign that started with a pirate airship was because of Final Fantasy XII's trailer ;-)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxelQmed9uc
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 03:49 PM		OOC: Yeah Final Fantasy returns to Ivalice
rampant

09-24-06, 04:20 PM		Elina - My hands are pruning up!

Sarah - At least your not sopping.

Elina - Not my fault you fell in!

Chalky - Oh be quiet this bite bad enough without your bickering.

The trio is scrubbing away all the mess from the paint they've been using for and since the wedding.

Sarah - Where are the ninjas? They helped.

Elina - Nin-jas, they're not gonna stick around.

Sarah - The squirrels?

Chalky they're doing the rigging.

Everyone looks up, to see the lines and sails roiling with squirrels.

Elina - I still want to know why we even have sails and riiging.
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 04:50 PM		OOC finished Muradin's wanted poster (http://static.flickr.com/83/251671325_e9a084be53.jpg?v=0).
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-24-06, 05:25 PM		Fun filled fact. The entire campaign that started with a pirate airship was because of Final Fantasy XII's trailer ;-)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxelQmed9uc
OOC: Except they have better graphics and bunny-girls.

Also, I'd do wanted posters for my trio, except there are no picture to go with them. I can't think of any pictures that would truely capture them, but I could still do them if you want.
Gladius_Lucix

09-24-06, 05:40 PM		Forbes - You are really bad at this.

Liam - huh?

Forbes - Your supposed to charge me an unbelievable sum, while I offer a pittance, some trash talk, a little rum, we come to an agreement thats about fair. Get your sales rep in here.

Liam: I don't have a sales rep. The person who would be in charge of marketing it on this Eberron hasn't showed up yet. Anyway, I'm an inventor, not a merchant. Could we start over, or something?

Forbes: *sigh*
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 05:40 PM		OOC: Graphics are for the weak! :D :P

But seriously, I can't wait for it to come out (and drop below the price of a small country).

I'm doing a wanted poster for Sarah and Elina. I've got Elina's done, still looking for Sarah. Any suggestions for a host?
rampant

09-24-06, 05:44 PM		Forbes - TERREK!

Terrek - What now?

Forbes - We had a deal!

Terrek - Yes and then your best student went and married my daughter. You know full well I'm within my rights.

Forbes - Feh! .... Allright but keep it to a minimum. I don't like you mucking around in my realm. I can't end this stupid war if others constantly interfere.

Terrek - I intend to. I have no love for the Scavengers myself, for now though we attend to other matters.

Forbes - Aye!.
------------------------------------

Forbes - Allright fine take your bloody platinum. Your no fun:P

Liam - I'll be right on it*zoom*.

Forbes - If he gets this to work lets see about getting the jammers and limiters hooked into this. We may finally be able to do multi setting devices that are worth the effort.

Illis - Got it boss.
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 06:15 PM		OOC: Kaizer FFXII if for the PS2 and will be out in the states this winter (already out in Japan). So for you the price would be roughly $50.00 at max.

IC: Squishy: You know know Liam I could have gotten a much bigger sum from him. Its kind of my thing.

Liam: Yeah, but every time I make a deal with neogi I feel like I've done something horribly wrong.

Squishy: Racist bastard! Just because every other member of my race is a greedy miser you instantly thing I am. I could be chaotic good and rebeling against my evil kin.

Liam: But you're not.

Squishy: True but I could be.
rampant

09-24-06, 06:21 PM		Rose - Redshirts have been going missing more than normal and no one is paying me, we have localized the disturbance to this area (points to map of the ship in 12.6 dimensions). I will be taking a volunteer squad into these corridors and we can serve the perp(s) with this fine.

Pholly - I left the oven on.

Rose - No excuses!

Pholly, Squishy, Rose, and Zella Gear up and descend into the bowels of the ship. Accross the Hall Pholly's lab explodes.

Pholly - Told you!
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 06:32 PM		Ok, here are the wanted posters I promised for Elina (http://static.flickr.com/26/251767473_b59a3fe03a.jpg?v=0) and Sarah (http://static.flickr.com/80/251759361_c238991f14.jpg?v=0). They're sooooooooooo cute! :D
Charles Phipps

09-24-06, 06:43 PM		Kawaaaaaiiiiiii!
Charles Phipps

09-24-06, 06:57 PM		http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/motivator1559023.jpg

A revised Zella
rampant

09-24-06, 07:01 PM		OOC: would anyone be brave enough to make a wanted poster for Satnak? if so is there a numerical value for deicide?
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 07:11 PM		The new Zella is hilarious, Charles.

As far as Satnak goes, I think you'd be the best one to pick the photo, rampant. Once you find one that you think fits, it only takes about 30 seconds to make one. And it's all free! urial and I are using Flickr and Charles is using Photobucket. If you'd like, you could give one or all of us a character (real or animated) to use, that way we're less likely to get pounded. :D
rampant

09-24-06, 07:15 PM		OOC: I was asking if you guys knew what Her reward total might come out to? How much do you charge for the capture of someone who killed the seventh of the dark six (Toren the Terror)?
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 07:22 PM		Oooooooohhhhhhhhh...

You could always do something similar to what Charles did for Admiral Jarlot Sr. (infinite credit). How about this?

Reward: Complete control of any 5 Planes of your choosing.

:D
Charles Phipps

09-24-06, 07:34 PM		OOC: I was asking if you guys knew what Her reward total might come out to? How much do you charge for the capture of someone who killed the seventh of the dark six (Toren the Terror)?

I doubt that Satnak has that big of a reward, no one particularly cares that you slew an evil demon :-)

Though Reidra is plissed you blew it up.

;-)
Crystalforged

09-24-06, 08:09 PM		I figure Satnak's reward would be something along the lines of "name your price."

Oh, and while I'm at it nice use of Presea for the wanted poster Kaizer. I'm not familiar with the characters used for Sarah or Zella though.
Charles Phipps

09-24-06, 08:23 PM		OOC: Effectively, I used Cecillia from Rune Soldier but I might have used Deedlit just as easily from Record of lodoss war (where Rune Soldier is set). Cecelia is just cuter.
rampant

09-24-06, 09:06 PM		OOC: I've go pictures, but I can't find the page Phipps linked the site to make them. What number was it?
------------------------------

Rose - This is just great! I expected Pholly to dissapear, but you would think Squishy after all this time evading that loco lobo chalky would have held his own.

Zella - Ummm

Rose - What!

Zella - We seem to have tranq darts in our necks. Pig *out*

Rose - *out*
Crystalforged

09-24-06, 09:11 PM		page 30, about half way down.

By the way I think I just had an epiphany. Even since pictures for characters were first shown back on the old thread I've been trying to find a picture that fit the images of Kanatash I have in my mind. I just though of one now, I'm going to see if I can put together a wanted poster with it.

EDIT: On second thought, I'm having trouble figuring out how to use the thingy. Can anybody expain how they did this or could I provide them with the information and have them do it?

DOUBLE EDIT: To be nitpicky ,I was just looking at the existing wanted posters I noticed they list the rewards in Galleons, this is Eberron, it should be Galifars. ;)
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 09:45 PM		OOC: I would assume that Satnak's reward would be very low because unlike the other characters she has done very little to tick off the "humaniod" governments. The highest rewards would go for Jarlot Sr., Terra, Kanatash, and Volrath (listed in order), because of the damage each has done to the five nations.

After all these governments aren't basing it off of how many evil deeds someone has done. If they were Satnak would be up there (she is chaotic evil she killed millions ona whim).
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 09:52 PM		The image I used for Sarah is of Kagura Sohma from Fruits Basket (yes, I read some shojo manga, so sue me). The reason she's so perfect is that she's normally a sweet young lady until she gets excited/angry. At that time, she flies into a berzerker rage and pummels the unfortunate target into a bloody pulp. :D

And Presea was the reason I picked pink hair for Elina. It's just so adorable! :cloud9:

I actually see Lisa as something like an armor clad, red-haired Sheena Fujibayashi ( :love: :drool: ).
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 09:56 PM		OOC: But with armor there's no giggle. :(

P.C.Urial: Cleanse you brain of such thoughts *holds surgical tools*

OOC: No not another lobotomy! I don't want to end up like A.D.D.Urial. I'll be good!

P.C.Urial: Fine but this is your last chance.
Crystalforged

09-24-06, 10:03 PM		I'm biased but I would think Kanatash would be worth more than Terra. The way I see it attempting do destroy reality is going to rank higher on their hit list than running the illegal drug underground and have no clue why they would want Jarlot Sr so badly. Jarlot I could see, he at least has the appearance of being the one in charge of all the crews crimes but I can't see what they'd want Senior so badly for.

Oh by the way Kaizer, that goes a long way towards explaining why you seemed to enjoy doing those honeymoon sceens so much (besides the obvious of course). ;)
rampant

09-24-06, 10:07 PM		OOC: Technically She's Chaotic nuetral, decent enough person, but tends to have an overdeveloped sense of revenge. Recently (read: since Serene) she's been mellowing out. ----------------------------

Rose - Ugh wha

Rose is neck deep in a giant soup pot on top of a big fire.

Various humanoids in shabby clothing dance aroud the flames.

Dancers - Boom chaka-laka, Boom chaka-laka, BOOOM CHAKA-LAKA

Zella - (tied to a pole outside the ring of dancers) Good your up now I can watch the look on your face when the pot boils.

Rose - How is this my fault?!

Lead Dancer - SILENCE!

Rose - What about her?

Lead Dancer - QUIET! Many moons have passed since we have had such easy prey. *pulls mask off*
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 10:09 PM		OOC: Politicians care very little for lives or even existance itself what they care about is money. Terra as a druglord would have stolen millions if not billions from the government each year. (I know stole is not the best word but I can't think of a better one) Sr. is based on captain Murphy and if he is anything like Murphy he caused atleast 6 trillion gp worth of damages if not more. Most of the reward for Kanatash and Volrath would be provided by Druids and Churches who have notably less money than the governments.
Charles Phipps

09-24-06, 10:11 PM		Jarlot Senior is Captain Murphy. Amongst other things he's responsible for these things...

* The one who accidentally started the last war by stabbing his brother Jarlot to death (Emperor of Galifar) for cheating in a poker game.

* Accidentally caused the Mourning.

* Sleeping with Khyber and thus siring poor Jarlot ("She seemed like a nice Lady")

* Created the Demon Wastes.

* Caused the War between the Dragons and the Elves.

* Time travelled and destroyed the Giant Civilization...

* And blew up EberronLab several times ;-)

Yes, the apple didn't fall very far from the tree.

But take note that the reason I chose "galleons" is because Galifars is a silly name. Hehe
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 10:11 PM		OOC: Technically She's Chaotic nuetral, decent enough person, but tends to have an overdeveloped sense of revenge. Recently (read: since Serene) she's been mellowing out. ----------------------------


This is not true she killed a coninent because she didn't want to go there. That is genocide and is evil no matter how you put it. They did nothing to hurt her. If you say she is neutral then so is Lord Soth after all he only killed a few hundred.
rampant

09-24-06, 10:15 PM		OOC: She fixed it. Doesn't that count for anything?
Crystalforged

09-24-06, 10:16 PM		Nevermind with the help thing, I figured out the wanted poster on my own, now to unveil it in all its glory. :D

http://s84.photobucket.com/albums/k37/crystalforged/?action=view&current=wantedposter.jpg&refPage=&imgAnch=imgAnch1

It's Kanatash on a bad day mind you, but more or less how I've always envisioned him.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 10:19 PM		Well, I'm not sure if greed or self-preservation would compel the Nations to offer a bigger reward. Kanatash may be threatening them with ultimate destruction, but not for a long time. The immediate gain is seen in Terra's capture. They want all the back taxes they've been losing from not legalizing drugs (therefore being able to claim it as a governable good/service). That, and they want access to her numbered Dannvian bank accounts. What better place to secure your money than that protected by the Inevitables? :D

Little do they know that those accounts are just a cover for where she really keeps her vast wealth...

No, I'm not telling.

BTW, just because I'm a guy doesn't mean I can't appreciate a good romance scene :P . Yes, I know what most of mine inevitably lead to. What more do you expect? ;)

*looks at Kanatash's new Poster* :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

urial, we've had this discussion on Satnak how many times? Just accept it. You have no room to talk, either. Volrath doesn't seem all that evil to me. He just has a twisted sense of what is actually "good" or "bad". :P ;)
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 10:21 PM		OOC: If a thief give back what he stole does that make the theft not count? Dying had to have hurt something horrible. Then you pull them back out of there rightful afterlives so the rightious lose out on their rewards and the villianous get out of eternal punishment. She really is a monster.

The last two lines are sarcasm, but the first two points still stand. I forgot that she fixed it. That considered she would be CN with evil tendencies. (she resorts to violence very quickly and tries to kill all of the alts with little provoking.
rampant

09-24-06, 10:24 PM		OOC: This is why ethics and time travel don't mix. She used a time regression effect to undo the mess. So technically she didn't do a blamed thing. Ok I'll give you the alts, except Norris he kicked her, and the league cut off access to the chili.
urial angel of death

09-24-06, 10:24 PM		OOC: Who is Kanatash's picture?
Crystalforged

09-24-06, 10:26 PM		Ramirez, one of the main villans from Skies of Arcadia.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 10:27 PM		OOC: Who is Kanatash's picture?
BLASPHEMY!!!!!!

You dare not recognize the BBEG of Skies of Arcadia! Infidel! I smite thee, foul beast!
Crystalforged

09-24-06, 10:29 PM		BLASPHEMY!!!!!!

You dare not recognize the BBEG of Skies of Arcadia! Infidel! I smite thee, foul beast!
Hey! Don't hog all the smiting for yourself! Let me have a crack at him too! I'll force him to watch that Lord of the Dance freak. That'll teach him.
cypher_zero

09-24-06, 10:40 PM		OOC: Huh. Well (if you dare) you'd better start smiting me too. I have no idea who any of those characters are in the most recent posters... But then, I don't watch anime/read manga/Play console games. Never even owned a console. I'm PC gamer. Yea.
.
Charles Phipps

09-24-06, 10:44 PM		OOC: Take note that the Chaos Effect on this ship makes any and all evil actions to be in the realm of "not guilty by insanity" so we still have the fact there's some good folk onboard.

Just not many.

And weird, this is the kind of discussion I wanted on the Wanted Posters ;-) It's like the Old Knights of the Dinner Table strip where they try to raise each other's bountirs until those with the least bounties turn them in.
Crystalforged

09-24-06, 10:44 PM		Cypher, seeing as you're my DM, you'll be spared. Outside of the game at least, I make no promises about my behavior in game.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 10:45 PM		Well (if you dare) you'd better start smiting me too.
It wasn't the fact that urial didn't recognize him that roused my Paladin of RPG's-OOKaizer, it's that he knows about Skies of Arcadia and still didn't recognize him. :P ;)
Kaizer_Ryu

09-24-06, 11:07 PM		Ok, here's Satnak (http://static.flickr.com/81/251997054_13ac22f1b4.jpg?v=0) and Serene's (http://static.flickr.com/96/251994239_d7c2333c2c.jpg?v=0) wanted poster. rampant got the pictures and the descriptions, I just put them together.
rampant

09-24-06, 11:22 PM		OOC: Thanks Kaizer
---------------------------

Rose - I recognize you, your the twerp that Tendra gave the buzz cut to.

Pholly - Oh dear!

Squishy - Must escape before...

Nemesis - Boo

Squishy and Pholly - *faint*

Robrands - We will eat well my people. :evillaugh
---------------------

OOC: Hey crystalforged, I think I found The flowergirl for Kanatashes wedding.
Crystalforged

09-25-06, 01:07 AM		If you're talking about Nemesis, yeah, I already stated in an earlier post that that was who I was planning on going with. It's the Ringbearer I'm not decided on yet.

EDIT: By the way, wouldn't it be extremely ironic if Robrands actually succeded and the campers ate squishy when Chalky has been chasing him forever but still hasn't managed to do just that?
rampant

09-25-06, 01:14 AM		OOC: I get the feeling that rose is first in line.
Crystalforged

09-25-06, 01:17 AM		Oh well, not like the crew would miss him.
rampant

09-25-06, 01:26 AM		Ernest dumps a bunch of powders into the soup.

Rose - *sniffsniff* nutmeg? paprika? Chili pepper? Do I look like spicy food to you?
Charles Phipps

09-25-06, 01:46 AM		Zella: Aren't you the least bit worried?

Rose: Well, if I was a Fighter I could just battle my way out of here.

Zella: Yes.

Rose: If I was a thief, I could untangle my bonds.

Zella: Yes.

Rose: If I was a cleric or wizard, witchcraft would avail me.

Zella: I'm missing your point Spoony Bard.

Rose: *INFLUENCE REACTIONS*

***

Rose: And that's when they made me their King.

OOC: Homage to Captain Jack Sparrow.
urial angel of death

09-25-06, 07:16 AM		OOC: Kaizer my knowledge of SoA is limited to there being imposters of your characters, there being a pompous evil guy who looks British from the first dungeon, and the fact that you get the moonstone cannon.

On Volrath not being evil you only think that because he is one of the protagonists. He is sympathetic evil. An evil that you can identify with and understand but is still evil. If you say that having a distorted view of good and bad makes you not evil then all of the fallowing people are neutral: Sephiroth, Middle Eastrn Extremists, and Lavos.

IC: Squishy: We're still in the soup aren't we.

Pholly: Yup and Zella is tied up in a skimpy native outfit.

Squishy: While I would love to think of how much gold she would net on the market with that type of clothing, we have more important matters to attend to.

Pholly: That being?

Squishy: Escape. There is a pokcet watch in my thorax pouch. Can you reach it.

Pholly: Yeah.

Squishy: Good, I sharpened its edge for use as an assassination weapon, but now it should work for our escape. Now you need to cut through these bonds and then I'll start spitting (remember neogi spit is toxic) everywhere to distract our captors. Then we run like hell.

Pholly: What about the others?

Squishy: What about them?

Pholly: Nevermind.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-25-06, 07:50 AM		Bunny: Ugh, E.B.N.E. talk.

Silver: Terra family…:drool:

OOcat: Note to others, you are not supposed to like that look.

Silver: Satnak and Serene…:drool:

OOcat: Pictures are a very bad idea.

:pile: -OOcat: ALL RIGHT! Hot _______________ on ________________ action!

OOcat: Aw infernals! :mad:
Norr

09-25-06, 08:36 AM		5816: No Illithid disquise will ever involve a squid.
5817: It will not fool the villagers.
5818: It will certainly not fool the illithids.
5819: They can read thoughts, you know.
5820: 'Mind blank' doesn't help, the squid will rat you out.
5821: There is no relation between illithids and squids whatsoever.
5822: The squid will probably suck your brains out anyway.
5823: Female redshirts are not to be referred to as 'redskirts'.
5824: Marish is not your 'animal companion'.
5825: Even if she wants to be.
5826: Because she's Andreas familiar, that's why.
5827: And yes, they have an empathic link.
5828: Don't ask.
rampant

09-25-06, 10:06 AM		Satnak - Found them!

Serene - What?

Satnak - My formal robes. Give me a moment

*change*

Serene - Now I know why you didn't use those for the wedding.

Satnak is wearing dull black full plate mostly hidden from view under a brown robe with hood and a short grey cape.

Satnak - I'm not sure how this is gonna work so I wanted to be prepared.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-25-06, 10:52 AM		OOC: You don't seem to take me giving you crap very well, urial. I guess it's a byproduct of my sense of humor relying more on my voice intonation and facial expressions than outright jokes. :P :D

And now for something a little more on the serious side.

IC:

Terra is pretty much buried under piles of paperwork, books, and tomes as she works furiously.

Elina: What'cha doin'?

Terra: Taking care of a major headache. Since Breland declared my business legal, I've been trying to navigate the virtual legal nightmare of being a multinational operation based in a country that wants full access to its workings and expects its cut of the profits, but that I cannot reveal the modus operandus of to anyone on the outside in order for it to survive.

Sarah: Did you understand any of that?

Elina: Not really.

Terra: Breland wants to tax my now-legal business, but the other major nations still declare it illegal. If Breland knows how it works, then the rest of the Nations are bound to find out and go for the kill.

Sarah & Elina: Ooooooooohhhhhhh.....

Terra: In return for their loyalty, I promise my underlings protection. If I simply expose the workings of my operation, then I have gone back on my word. Such a thing would lead to chaos and infighting. Possibly worse.

Sarah: Why is Momma so upset by this?

Terra: It's a moral quandry. She's much better at dealing with them than most Paladins, but it still bothers her that there's no clear-cut best choice. The "Good" thing for me to do would be to dismantle my empire and end the trafficing. Unfortuantely, that is impossible. So long as there is a demand, something like what I run will always exist. Simply abandoning my empire would lead to an all out war for control among the branches, and any successor I name would be "tested" rather rigorously.

Elina: You mean...assassinated?

Terra: Yeah. It's a dangerous world. I'm trying to find the best route out. Though I'm not sure what that is anymore... (i.h.h.) Can't do bribes, Lisa'd be mad as hell about that... *sigh* I don't see how she stays so good amisdst this moral muck. But that's one of the things I love about her so much. Don't worry, hon. I'll figure this out...
rampant

09-25-06, 12:09 PM		13 - Mail call

Terra - Huh?

13 - this is yours....

Terra - What you want a tip or something?

13 - I'm supposed to say something witty, but the squirrel smudged the cue cards. Later.

Terra - Let see its from kithle, :rolleyes: of course he offered to eat the inpsector(s) brains and impersonate it/them. Why do all of his plans start that way?
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-25-06, 02:20 PM		OOcat: This is sooooo easy.

Terra: How?

OOcat: Dummy corporations, façad CEOs, cell units. Basically present a completely false yet working face to the world, and when the other nations try to undermine your opporation they'll be stymied and don't know why. :D Why does anyone in Breland have to know a thing about your illegal opporations in other countries?
Crystalforged

09-25-06, 07:00 PM		Kanatash: (butting in) There's an even easier solution too. Blow up Breland. If they've been wiped from the face of the map they're laws won't be a proble anymore and it's not like it would take much effort either, look how many times its happened to Sharn. Just tell Boranal that the metal sphere I sent him for his birthday has candy in it.

Terra: :bored: I take it it doesn't have candy in it.

Kanatash: Hell no, it cantains an eldrich device that will bring the plane of madness into alignment again and open a portal to Xoriat on that spot. I doubt the dealkyr would destroy the world but Breland's sure to be a loss.

OOCat: :nonono: Why would you give Boranal something like that?

Kanatash: :D Cuz, I could.

Terra: (sigh) Why do people seem to insist in getting involved in my personal business?
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-25-06, 07:05 PM		OOCat: :nonono: Why would you give Boranal something like that?
OOcat: It's utterly boring and completely unsubtle.
Terra: (sigh) Why do people seem to insist in getting involved in my personal business?
OOcat: Because you E.B.N.E. chooses to broadcast it.

OOC: Hey, Charles, I saw your post on atomicthinktank.com about Eberron superheros. You've only used Jacob Hunter so far, bring them on!
Charles Phipps

09-25-06, 07:07 PM		King Rose: Boom shaka laka makey wiki wiki.

Cannibals: Wiki wiki boom shaki!

Pholly: What are you telling them?

King Rose: The hell if I know.

Squishy: Doesn't the bards book say you have to speak their language to influence reactions?

King Rose: Not in 3.75 edition!

Zella: GET ME OUT OF HERE!

King Rose: Elfy Welfy be mucho yum yum!

Zella: THAT ISN'T HELPING!

King Rose: Well let me influence reactions for you guys.

*in the cosmic game of dice of the gods, a 1 occurs*

Cannibals: GROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWLLL!

King Rose: Oops, that only happens one out of every 20 times I try this.

*Squishy and Pholly are then pulled on a pole as the cannibals start towards the volcano*

King Rose: Bye guys!

***

Back the Forgotten Freedom

*Rose covered in char marks, smelling vaguely of coconuts, and covered in tribal warpaint sips a pinnacolada*

Rose: Well personally Terra, I can't say that I think that your syndicate is better off run by you.

Terra: What do you mean?

Rose: Let's face it Terra, you're gone A LOT and can't supervise your subordinates as well as you'd like. When it was just you, it was okay because you could ruthlessly kill whomever got in your way and kept the money flowing....but they know how often you drop in now and that's going to hurt in the end.

Terra: I think I know the drug market better than you Rose.

Rose: I'll let you in on a little secret Terra. There's a reason I only date Zella, a fellow immortal elf. It's also why I tend to leave the room whenever the market is brought up.

Terra: Why's that? Also, where's all that money I've been giving you going to anyway?

Rose: Rehab Clerical stations, not that they do any good.

Terra: That's not like you Rose.

Rose: When I left the Eldeen Reaches, I went to Sharn Terra. Pretty much as far from the environment we grew up in as possible.

Terra: ....I'm missing the point.

Rose: Life is disgusting on the streets Terra as you well know. People turn to stuff like your Druidweed and Dreamlilly passed on by those scumbags in the Reidrans just to get by. I got involved with a girl named Achiga and we were happy for a time. We even had descendents whom have long since gone on to have their own descendents though most of them died in the Last War.

Terra: Rose I...

Rose: It wasn't your stuff Terra, which is pretty harmless weeds. She tried dreamlilly and while I was off trying to make money, it weakened her during a bad winter and it killed her. Nevertheless, her choice or not, I still want to track down every agent of the Dreaming Dark from their network at the bottom to the top and snap their throats for the fact I'll never see her smile again.

Kanatash: Hmmph.

Rose: Oh and I think King Steve is still trying to pry open that thing with a fork.
Crystalforged

09-25-06, 07:18 PM		OOC: Hey, Charles, I saw your post on atomicthinktank.com about Eberron superheros. You've only used Jacob Hunter so far, bring them on!
OOC: Linky please. :bigeyes:
Charles Phipps

09-25-06, 07:20 PM		OOC: www.atomicthinktank.com see http://www.atomicthinktank.com/viewtopic.php?t=17931&highlight=eberron

I suggest you also all check out "Story Hour" and the "Halt Evil Doer" thread where you'll see my gaming group (the one that inspired the original thread) handle superheroes!
rampant

09-25-06, 07:59 PM		Serene - Are you done getting ready yet?

Satnak - Almost I just need to find my last dagger belt.

Serene - Why did you even bring that?

Satnak - Becuase One of them has mouth pick and verminbane. The squirrles don't like me leaving it were fluffy can get his paws on it.

Serene - *looks in* Oh come on don't you the the hammers are a little much? One belt of medium to small weapons and a pole-arm.

Satnak - Fine, hmm long axe and the daggers then. Got the Guarded Heart?

Serene - *twists to show it* always Silly girl.
cypher_zero

09-25-06, 08:07 PM		OOC: Working on the Banquet thing right now. Have it up later tonight.
.
urial angel of death

09-25-06, 08:07 PM		Squishy: Damnit Pholly hurry with the ropes!

Pholly: I can't reach. Got any other bright ideas?

Squishy: One, and there is no gurantee it will work.

Pholly: I don't care just try!

Squishy: *ear-splitting screech*

*in the realm of the gods a natural 20 is rolled.*

Crashing through the trees comes an enormous umber hulk. It rips through the campers and frees Squishy. Suishy runs up its back to his perch on the umberhulk's shoulders.

----------

*Many years later a very old Squishy is talking to several young children that look like crosses between Volrath and P/Y/R, Kanatash and Caralot, Lily and Sarah, Satnak and Serene, and one that looks like an overly pale Elina*

Squishy: And they made me their chief.
rampant

09-25-06, 08:23 PM		*Many years later a very old Squishy is talking to several young children that look like crosses between Volrath and P/Y/R, Kanatash and Caralot, Lily and Sarah, and one that looks like an overly pale Elina*

Squishy: And they made me their chief.

Stringer - Whatch out Old spider, the paint wolf be prowling this night.

Old Chalky - (with a walker) I'll get'ya this time.

Old Squishy - (on a mobile platform) Oh no you don't.

Behold the worlds slowest tom and jerry moment.
-------------------------

OOC: If you know who stringer is...CRAM IT!
urial angel of death

09-25-06, 08:31 PM		OOC: Glad you liked it and I added Satnak and Serene's kids I just forgot. Also who is Stringer?
cypher_zero

09-25-06, 08:32 PM		OOC: We're not saying.
Charles Phipps

09-25-06, 08:47 PM		OOC: Lilly's Wanted poster, though perhaps a bit in the future.

http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/motivator6406174.jpg

Lilly Galan *there's a Crisis for the New Background*

Paladin 1

Rose's human son with an unknown mother and partially raised by Zella at various points in his life, Lilly is a year older than Sarah and currently undergoing training with a practice sword underneath Saint Michael to become a paladin of Dol Arrah. He has a stirring sense of justice and a certain err....naitivity is a good word...to the evil nature of many of the crew. His blockheadedness is one of the reasons why not even Kanatash can corrupt him. Rose has given him a armor of invulnerability (gnome sized for now) to get him through problems until adulthood.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-25-06, 08:50 PM		OOC: www.atomicthinktank.com see http://www.atomicthinktank.com/viewtopic.php?t=17931&highlight=eberron

I suggest you also all check out "Story Hour" and the "Halt Evil Doer" thread where you'll see my gaming group (the one that inspired the original thread) handle superheroes!
OOC: Are these the same people who started the whole Forgotten Freedom madness? I'm starting to think we should all assume identities over on atomicthinktank so we can do another thread, this one about superheros. Or we could do something with them here.
Charles Phipps

09-25-06, 08:51 PM		OOC: Yes, indeed its that group. You can gather from the way they play superheroes.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-25-06, 09:37 PM		Terra: Ok guys, I just want to make something clear. I'm trying to do this by the book. I want out, but I don't want to leave utter chaos.

Kanatash: You're whipped, you know.

Terra: Like you're not?

Kanatash: Touche...

Rose: Like I said, you're rarely there in the first place.

Terra: Says you.

Several shadow dopplegangers appear.

Terra: *in unison* I can be anywhere I want so long as it's connected to the Plane of Shadow. I am no longer completely bound to this mortal shell.

The dopplegangers disappear.

Rose: Ok, that was freaky.

Terra: You have no idea...but I did just have an idea. Rose.

Rose: Yeah?

Terra: We're going to have to renegotiate the contract. I'm officially breaking up my empire.

Rose: Didn't you just say you didn't want to?

Terra: It's more of a downsize. The different branches already function as regional offices anyway. I only need to reorganize it so they have no formal ties. I also have all the records at my disposal. I can provide enough evidence to convict any and all of my more abitious employees should they forget their place and begin reforging it.

Kanatash: Isn't that more than a little hypocritical?

Terra: So long as they don't do anything stupid, my lips are sealed.

Rose: How is this getting out? You'd be meddling an awful lot to accomplish that.

Terra: They're a cowardly lot with enough experience with my tactics to know I could find out what they do all the time if I chose to. All I have to say are three little words and I won't have any problems...

Rose: "Paint my house"? :P

Terra: Smart ass. No. "I'm watching you..." :devil:

Lisa: *walking in* And those in Breland? What will you do with them?

Terra: :) I was just getting to that. I employ a lot of outcasts, former thieves only by necessity, and just down and out types with no where else to go. They're surprisingly diligent and trustworty so long as they feel secure. I can pull a few strings and get them pardons, fines, community service time, etc. They can then get a fresh start in a truly legitimate buisness.

Lisa: That still leaves all the true criminals free.

Terra: I gave my word that I would not betray them so long as they remained loyal. That still holds. If they get themselves in trouble, I have no qualms about helping regional law enforcement nail their ass.

Rose: It's a rather cold way to do things.

Terra: It's their choice. I'm forcing no one's hand.

Lisa: And your network?

Terra: I've been disbanding the humanoid element for some time. They've mostly taken up adventuring and exploration. Many are my friends, so I'm still in contact with a few of them.

Kanatash: That's boring...

Terra: *looks at Rose* What can I say? I chose to marry a do-gooder.

Rose: You're still whipped.

Terra: *looks at Lisa* I think I'm enjoying it. ;)

Lisa: ;) :embarrass
Charles Phipps

09-25-06, 09:41 PM		Rose: Yes...

*shakes his head and walks away*

Lilly: Oh don't mind him Auntie-Terra, he's just upset because it's mom's birthday.

*pulls out a HUGE broadsword*

Lilly: I'm hoping to celebrate it by destroying EVIL!

*waves sword around*

Lilly: POW! POW! POW! POW!

Sarah: Pah-pah-PARN! Pah-Pah-PARN!

Zella: Honestly, I swear if I hear anything more about Rose's dead girlfriend I'll scream, Terra could you figure out a way to give him a map of the Dreaming Dark's network with your contacts? I think he needs some closure on it.
cypher_zero

09-25-06, 09:45 PM		Serene: Well, if you’re ready I guess we’d better get going

Satnak: Yeah.

Serene stands back away from Satnak for a moment and then extends her arm to it’s full length with her fingers spread away from her. She closes her fingers slowly leaving only her index finger outstretched. It begins to lengthen slowly and forms into a razor sharp metallic claw (Satnak: [i.h.h.] That is sooo hot!). Serene speaks a few arcane words and it begins to glow a bright blue. Her arm raises over her head and she slashes down with her outstretched finger/claw and rends a hole in space. A small tear appears in the air.

Satnak: Huh.

Serene: Yeah. Getting home is hard. You have to tear a hole in space and time to do it. I don’t like to do it myself because if you don’t do it just right… Daddy does it all the time so he never worries about it. Most of the time you don’t even know there’s even been a tear because he just moves through it as he tears and seals it behind himself all at the same time. I haven’t quite mastered that yet, but I spend most of my time with you anyways so I’ve never had to.

Satnak: So, do we know what to expect?

Serene: Well, knowing daddy, he’ll have some big surprise planned. He hates surprises, but he loves to spring them on other people. I just hope it’s nothing too big.

Satnak: Well I guess we better get going then.

Serene: Yeah.

Serene takes Satnak’s hand and leads her through the tear. They appear in Terrek's lab and Serene closes the tear behind them.

Satnak: So where is your da…

Terrek: I’m right here.

Satnak whirls around and sees Terrek standing behind her.

Terrek: Hmm… That won’t do at all. You look like you’re ready for the battlefield, not the ballroom. Come, let’s find you something decent to wear.

Satnak: I think I’m fine in this thank you very much.

Terrek *sigh* Satnak… Daughter… you have absolutely nothing to fear here. My rule here is supreme and my power unsurpassed in this realm. You are also wedded to my only daughter, who herself has mastered the magik here enough that a few notes from her lips and all who would raise a hand against you are powerless to her charm. Add that to the fact that I am not only not limiting, but boosting your own considerable strength and any who would even think to attack you, even unarmored, wouldn’t stand even the remotest of chances. I know my daughter didn’t even try to talk you out of it because that’s her nature, but please, if you go to the banquet dressed as you are you’ll only make a fool of yourself.

OOC: Rampant, your reply. Be quick though, I want to try and get this whole thing done tonight if I can.
.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-25-06, 09:48 PM		Terra: Ok guys, I just want to make something clear. I'm trying to do this by the book. I want out, but I don't want to leave utter chaos.
Details-OOcat: But a façad is in the book.

Other-Details-OOcat: (whisper) Other book.

Details-OOcat: There are so many books.

OOcat: Can we focus here?

Bunny: On what? :bored: There's not much to comment on. Other than Satnak's over-abundance of weapons.

OOcat: You're a god of death. That should be right up your alley.

Bunny: I meant someone else should make that comment. Me, personally, I think you can never have enough ways to kill people.

Silver: Do you think she's compensating for something? Wink, wink, nudge, nudge, say-no-more?

Satnak: Tail.

Silver: Oh…right…:embarrass…my bad.……:blink:…:devil:

OOcat: Do not used the word "prehensile".
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-25-06, 09:54 PM		Terrek *sigh* Satnak… Daughter… you have absolutely nothing to fear here. My rule here is supreme and my power unsurpassed in this realm. You are also wedded to my only daughter, who herself has mastered the magik here enough that a few notes from her lips and all who would raise a hand against you are powerless to her charm. Add that to the fact that I am not only not limiting, but boosting your own considerable strength and any who would even think to attack you, even unarmored, wouldn’t stand even the remotest of chances.
13: So no "prime-minister betrays me, kidnapps my daughter, and her superhero boy/girl(don't you even think about adding to this Silver)friend has to go and save her all heroicly before I banish the bad guy to later become a clichéd villain in the hero's main plotline"?

Terrek: I see you've put a lot of thought into it. I also see you are in my realm when the rule is clearly that you are no allowed to.

13: Whoops. My bad. *BAMPH!*
Kaizer_Ryu

09-25-06, 09:57 PM		Terra: Ah, yes. I'd actually be rather happy to not only provide such information, but help him out in his endeavor.

Lisa: You're still angry about that aren't you?

Terra: The death of my friends, including my fiancee, the theft of my identity, a thousand years spent in the body of an abberation...yes, yes I am.

Lisa: This is something Rose needs to do.

Terra: Oh, don't get me wrong. I have no intention of stealing the show. I merely enjoy tormenting them. They can replace one Inspired or other agent fairly easily, but being outmaneuvered...that bugs them to no end. But...

Zella: Yeah?

Terra: Did you say it was Mom's birthday?

Zella: Oh, yeah.

Terra: :doh: Crap! I'm gonna go find Rose and see if he's doing anything.

Lisa: The girls will want to come too.

Terra: I'll find Rose, you get the girls. I'll let you know.
Charles Phipps

09-25-06, 10:01 PM		*waits til Terra is out of earshot*

Sarah: Did you intend to tell her you meant YOUR mom Lilly?

Lilly: FOR TRUTH! FOR JUSTICE! FOR...PIE!

Sarah: *SMACK* Dumbass!

Lilly: You called my love?

Sarah: *sigh* Its your mom's birthday and not Terra and Rose's mom's birthday right?

Lilly: You mean...our....GRANDMOTHER right?

Sarah: Yes, I suppose I do, though we're not blood related that closely right.

Lilly: Yes, through the miracles of adoption!

Sarah: Okay.

Lilly: But its both mom's birthday because...THEY HAPPEN ON THE SAME DAY!

Sarah: Why are you shouting that?

Lilly: I don't know!

OOC:

An adventure of Sarah and Lilly!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cmEZLtZObhg
Kaizer_Ryu

09-25-06, 10:05 PM		OOC: Yeah, I read that wrong :embarrass . But through the miracle of the NARRATIVE ELEMENT all is made right :D .

*watches the link*

Oh.

My.

Gods.

I think I just died a little.
cypher_zero

09-25-06, 10:13 PM		OOC: *watches the link*

Oh.

My.

Gods.

I think I just died a little.
OOC: Oh dear lord. By all that is good in the world... WHY! Dear God WHY! My eyes! My eyes! They BURN! Arrrgh! My ears are bleeding too! Aaaahhh!
.
Charles Phipps

09-25-06, 10:22 PM		Camelot parody:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wWaETtgjsxw

And some more Lilly and Elina! Assume Michael is the villain and Sabriel is there too!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z2Ud556D1iM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xs72anyoWCU&mode=related&search=

IC:

Elina: Weird how I'm Jewish in those clips.

Lilly: PAH PAH PARN!

Elina: Oh shut up!

Charles: I'm just upset all of them aren't online!

Elina: You would be!
Crystalforged

09-25-06, 10:38 PM		:whatsthis That the best you got? That was odd at best, certainly not disturbing. Good attempt though. :P

By the way how do you keep finding these videos? Do you surf youtube 24/7 or something?
Charles Phipps

09-25-06, 10:42 PM		OOC: Actually, I just happen to have seen the originals ;-)
Kaizer_Ryu

09-25-06, 10:45 PM		OOC: Ow.

I think the part that hurts most is the voice acting. I've seen my share of Chibi anime (hence the Chibi wand), so that doesn't bug me.

But I still feel violated. ;)
rampant

09-26-06, 12:25 AM		Satnak - :headexplo *grits teeth* *glare* please...don't call me daughter. The last man who did that was burned alive, I heard him screaming as his soul was destroyed. No matter how far I ran I could still hear it.

Terrek - I...(sweet khyber the only thing holding her back is her love for Serene)

Satnak - If you must use "child" or something ok. *glare*

Terrek - Of course I didn't mean to...

Satnak - I know you didn't. *sigh*... Ok fine the out fit can be changed, but the robe and cape have to stay until dancing or something like that.

------------------------

OOC: Sorry about the wait cypher you posted while i was unavailiable.
Crystalforged

09-26-06, 01:11 AM		Kanatash: *pokepoke* Hey, shouldn't we be working on getting the wedding done?

OOCrystalforged: mumble... later...

Kanatash: You said that last time. I know you want to finish this. Everyone else wants us to finish this. I want you to finish this.

OOCrystalforged: Maybe, but I haven't decided what to write.

Kanatash: Just start writing, the rest will come to you as you go. Its what you've always done before and it works. No one is going to ridicule you if it sucks, well ok they will and so will I, I'll literally rip you a new one if it sucks, it is my wedding after all you'd be ****ing up. Thats not the point though, the point is that it has to be done.

OOCrystalforged: mumblemumble... tomorrow... sleepy...

Kanatash: (sigh) I didn't want to do this but you've forced my hand.

OOCrystalforged: Hey, hey, hey! Give me back my pants! And what the hell do you think you're doing with those jumper cables! Fine, I'll start writing it! It'll probably take a few days to wrap up though. I said get those jumper cables away from me! And what the hell did you do with my pants?!
rampant

09-26-06, 01:17 AM		OORampant - He traded them to me for the jumper cables:D

OOCrystal - What happened to your pants?

OORampant - Kithle Decided that since i riff Capatain SNES so much I should be denied pants like Captain SNES.

Kithle - *yoink* no pants for you. *run*

OORampant - *pulls a superscope* Get back here with my pants! I'll uncreate you!! *pursue*

OOCrystalforged - You mean MY pants! *pursue*

Kanatash - Oh no you don't get back to that keyboard you! *pusrue*
cypher_zero

09-26-06, 01:17 AM		Terrek: Pardon; I was afraid “child” would come off as demeaning. As to the robes and cape… I think I have something more fitting. I had it made specially for this occasion to include both your house colors and mine. You are after all a part of my family now. This way...

Terrek leads Satnak down a short corridor, Serene following behind. Huge oak double doors open up to a lavishly furnished bedroom. The girls pause at the doorway as Terrek enters and stare in awe. Terrek turns around and smiles at the two.

Terrek: Your room.

Serene: Father it’s…

Satnak: Enormous…

Terrek: Yes well… only the best for my daughter hmm? And her wife of course. You’ll find your outfits for the evening laid out on the bed there; I believe they’ll be to your liking. You’ve some time to get ready before the banquet begins; I’ll be waiting in the main foyer. Oh, and your wedding gifts are on the bed as well. I crafted them myself. I think you’ll find even Naz’roth would be hard pressed to replicate the craftsmanship. Now hurry up and get ready, you’ve only about an hour.

Terrek leaves the room shutting the doors behind him. The girls turn to the huge bed in the center of the room. Fine sheets of red silk cover it inlaid with intricate patterns and silk draperies hang from the top. Satnak draws her hand up to pull them aside and they move away on their own revealing a mattress large enough for ten people and an assortment of scented pillows.

Satnak: Wow…

Serene: Yea… daddy never half-does anything. He always goes overboard.

Satnak: It’s not just that… Before you came along, Ter... er your dad and I had a lot of disagreements. Now that we’re married, it’s… well, it’s just kind of weird that he’s treating me so nicely. He’s usually so harsh and cruel around everyone else. Sometimes I wonder how he could even have a daughter like you.

Serene: *sigh* Daddy isn’t always like that. He’d do anything for me if I asked him to; even if everyone else said it was impossible. It makes me angry sometimes how everyone sees him as some kind of sinister monster… he’s really a good man at heart, he just hides it in front of other people.

Satnak: Why though? I’d think he’d have a lot less problems with some of the crew if he wasn’t so uptight about everything.

Serene: *sigh* I know. That bugs me too, but he can’t help it. You’ve been through a lot; most of which I’m sure you haven’t even told me about, but he’s lived for almost a thousand years and has had to fight for one reason or another every day of those thousand years. He won’t even tell me a lot of it. I only hear bits and pieces, usually by accident like when he was telling Terra and Lisa about how he came to rule this plane. He gets this look in his eyes when he doesn’t think anyone’s looking, like he’s thinking about all the things he’s been through and it almost brings tears to his eyes. Then he’ll see me looking and hide it again…

Satnak: …

OOC: Rampant, you’re up.
.
Charles Phipps

09-26-06, 01:39 AM		Rose: In any case, the ceremony is done and there's not going to be any further trouble like there was at Lisa and Terra's wedding.

Zella: You weren't even there.

Rose: Yes, I was. I was on the bride's side.

Zella: WHICH BRIDE!?

Rose: Well...

***

Flashback to the wedding guest room

Queen Diani: Ooooohhhhhh Rose.

Rose: Yes my Queen?

Queen Diani: Take me around the world again.

***

Rose: Uhhhh I was just hanging about.

Zella: Uhhh...huh.

Rose: *whistles*

Zella: In any case, shouldn't we recruit Kanatash to fight the dreaming dark?

Rose: *snort* He's not what you'd call a NORMAL Kalashatar.
rampant

09-26-06, 01:41 AM		Satnak - I only know one other human who has lived to be a thousand. Forbes, and he was driven to completely reconfiguring his brain to handle it.

Serene - I thought you said he was about 35?

Satnak - Closer to 45 by now. Anyway he hasn't been around for a millenia, but he experiences more emotion in a day than most do in a lifetime. It ages his mind and soul if not his body. I've seen it in your father, in Sa'vor as well, any who live beyond the intended limit of their mind or body.

Serene - So...

Satnak - I'll try to be good. I know all about fronting, I know how hard it is to show your true face sometimes. So where are the clothes? This bed is huge!

Serene - Silly girl!

Satnak - Watch those hands, if we start now I won't get you settled down for days.
cypher_zero

09-26-06, 02:21 AM		OOC: That's it for tonight. Need to get some sleep. I'll try and finish it up tomorrow.
.
urial angel of death

09-26-06, 07:26 AM		OOC: Charles those are absolutely amazing. Where are the rest and where is the serious version?
rampant

09-26-06, 10:29 AM		Satnak - Seriously, did the clothes get hidden under the covers I turned or something?

Serene - They're down here at this end.
Gladius_Lucix

09-26-06, 11:26 AM		Serene: … he’s really a good man at heart,
OOC: They say the same thing about Doctor Doom.
----
Liam rushed into his lab, quickly putting on his tool belt. The Duct Tape Swarm rolls in behind him.

Liam: Alright, I need to get this done quickly. Gather the parts, Sam.

Duct Tape Swarm: Sam? Who's Sam?

Liam: You are.

Sam: Could you not come up with a better name?

Liam: If you can find a better one, feel free to use that. Until then, you're Sam.

Sam: Fine. What do you need?

Liam: Temporal Transducers, a few Cannith loops, and some Mithril wire.

Sam: Alright. I'll be right back.

Sam rolls out, and Liam begins gathering the materials he has in the lab.

----

OOC: PLEASE, someone come up with a better name for the Duct Tape Swarm.:bigeyes:
Crystalforged

09-26-06, 11:52 AM		OOC: PLEASE, someone come up with a better name for the Duct Tape Swarm.
Sticky? DTS? Queen Amedala?
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-26-06, 02:20 PM		OOC: PLEASE, someone come up with a better name for the Duct Tape Swarm.:bigeyes:
OOC: Ducky
Any dog name (man's best friend!)
Dave (Barry)
Coop
Binder (like Bender)
Al (Bundy)
The name of any character from anywhere that strikes you as a "man".
rampant

09-26-06, 05:59 PM		Satnak - Regardless of how much fun that is, we need to get changed.

Serene - Awwwwww:P

Satnak - Just think about how much fun we can have later. I won't be able to make it through the banquet if you get me anymore wound up.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-26-06, 09:02 PM		OOC: I did my own version of Terra's (http://static.flickr.com/116/253712833_378149df3a.jpg?v=0) wanted poster. I hope you like it. The woman in the picture is almost exactly how I see Terra in my head. Just give her green hair and yellow eyes, and it's pretty much her double.
rampant

09-26-06, 09:07 PM		OOC: Actually we still make useful Meat sheilds, laborers, and I can make great cookies.

Kithle - Have you no pride?

OORampant - I traded my dignity, and my sense of fair play in for imagination and DnD books.

Kithle - That explains far too much.
cypher_zero

09-26-06, 09:14 PM		OOC: Atually, this makes me think of a new name and role for the Duct Tape Swarm: Mahn! Champion of all that is manly! Defender of manliness! Lover of women! Lifter of heavy objects! He's... Mahn!

... I have no idea where that came from... back to Satnak and Serene... Hopfully have the next bit up within the hour.
.
urial angel of death

09-26-06, 10:08 PM		OOC: Terra proves nothing because she is a man. Sorry had to get that out of the way. :P

My thoughts on the subject are about the same as Rampant's except for having to add computer skills to the list. From my experience most woman while competent around PCs would never bother to learn programming, because it requires a level of geeky few girls will descend to.
Crystalforged

09-26-06, 10:29 PM		Somewhere in the mournland, the Forgotten Freedom, the Forgotten Freedom 2, and the Forever Freedom all hover over the glass platue. Kanatash and Kelter are standing on the bow of FF 2 next to a small telescope fixed to the front of the craft.

Kelter: Preperations should be ready.

Kanatash: So you've calibrated the mi-go can as per my specifications?

Kelter: Yes.

Kanatash: The Weirsan battery holding whatevers left of the charge you got from Caralot's dimension is hooked up to it?

Kelter: Of course.

Kanatash: The cannon is recieving power from my Xoriat portal?

Kelter: Yes, yes, yes. Everything is as you instructed me, I checked it already, then I double checked, then you checked it, and told me to check it one more time. Can we just do this already.

Kanatash: Fine, go man the cannon I'll give you the signal.

Kelter heads below deck and Kanatash puts his eye to the telescope.

Kanatash: Alright, lower the bow 30 degrees... stop. Ok, a little to the left, too much! Alright, a lttle more... There! Alright Kelter, Fire!

The mi-go cannon unleashes a massive blast of multicolored energy directly towards the surface of the platue, striking a particularly large crystal formation. The energy reflects off in five different directions, striking five new crystals. Each new crystal reflects the energy again towards each other until they have formed a massive pentagram of energy between each other. There tinkling of broken glass as suddenly all of the crystals struck by the energy detonate in unison. As the dust clears where the crystals where there is now a massive bowl shaped crater in the plateu. It's surface has an opalescent sheen and hundreds of multi-hued translucent piews circle the bowl. In the very center there is now a crystaline gazebo.

Kanatash: ...Well, I had hoped for something more extravagant but I suppose it'll do.

Kelter: (now back on deck) Is it just me or does this seem overly complicated?

Kanatash: I don't care, at least my entity is at the keyboard.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-26-06, 11:32 PM		OOC: Atually, this makes me think of a new name and role for the Duct Tape Swarm: Mahn! Champion of all that is manly! Defender of manliness! Lover of women! Lifter of heavy objects! He's... Mahn!
There can be only one true defender of manliness:

CHUCK NORRIS! (http://www.noelheikkinen.com/noel/chucknorris.jpg)

:D
rampant

09-27-06, 12:30 AM		OORampant - I have a Superscope and I'm not afraid to use it, Cypher!
----------------

OOC: I don't mind the slow that much, its just funny :D
cypher_zero

09-27-06, 03:04 AM		OOC: Alright. I'm sorry, but i'm going to have to delay the next bit till tomorrow at least. It's not my fault, really. You can all blame Charles for writing such a d*mn good book.
.
Charles Phipps

09-27-06, 03:23 AM		OOC: Thanks!

Glad you're enjoying it.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-27-06, 07:41 AM		Caralot and her family watch Kanatash's excessive carving technique from the deck of their ship.

Bruce: You've got a smart boy there, Cari.

Johnny: Whoa, dude, like, cool.

Gillamma looks around at the dead gray mist.

Gillamma: What is this place?

Caralot: It's called the Mournland. It's what Cyre became without the Boiling.

Darastrix glares at the mist. Anyone who's watching carefully notices that it begins to creep away from her line of sight.

Darastrix: This won't do at all! My daughter is not going to be married under some wishy-washy gray muck! It'll be either clear skies or black stormclouds, no mistakes. Gillamma?

Gillamma: I don't think this stuff can be moved by winds alone.

Roosevelt: Give me a few days and maybe I can whip something up with Liam's help.

Johnny: Like, dudes, leave it to me.

Johnny steps out on the bowsprit (the pointy bit on the front) and goes out to the end.

Johnny: Like, mist dude, you're so totally bogus. Clear out, man.

The mist clears, and sunlight shines down on the Mournland for the first time in many long years.

Johnny: Cool.

OOC: Yes, in certain situations Johnny is that powerful.
Crystalforged

09-27-06, 09:44 AM		Caralot and her family watch Kanatash's excessive carving technique from the deck of their ship.

Bruce: You've got a smart boy there, Cari.

Johnny: Whoa, dude, like, cool.

Gillamma looks around at the dead gray mist.

Gillamma: What is this place?

Caralot: It's called the Mournland. It's what Cyre became without the Boiling.

Darastrix glares at the mist. Anyone who's watching carefully notices that it begins to creep away from her line of sight.

Darastrix: This won't do at all! My daughter is not going to be married under some wishy-washy gray muck! It'll be either clear skies or black stormclouds, no mistakes. Gillamma?

Gillamma: I don't think this stuff can be moved by winds alone.

Roosevelt: Give me a few days and maybe I can whip something up with Liam's help.

Johnny: Like, dudes, leave it to me.

Johnny steps out on the bowsprit (the pointy bit on the front) and goes out to the end.

Johnny: Like, mist dude, you're so totally bogus. Clear out, man.

The mist clears, and sunlight shines down on the Mournland for the first time in many long years.

Johnny: Cool.

OOC: Yes, in certain situations Johnny is that powerful.
Kanatash: Hm, I don't know. I'd prefer the black stormcloud option. Can you do anything about the weather? A good lighting show would have just the right ominous feel for the wedding and provide a nice lightshow to boot.
rampant

09-27-06, 11:12 AM		Satnak - Ooooooooooooh, fine you win:tongue:

Serene - :D
Kaizer_Ryu

09-27-06, 11:15 AM		Kanatash: Hm, I don't know. I'd prefer the black stormcloud option. Can you do anything about the weather? A good lighting show would have just the right ominous feel for the wedding and provide a nice lightshow to boot.
Terra: Remember, if he can't, I can.

Lisa: I still can't believe Jonny did that.

Lilly: PAH PAH PARN!

Sarah & Elina: Shut up!

Lilly: It was ME who cleared the mist by destroying EVIL!

Sarah & Elina: :rolleyes:
rampant

09-27-06, 11:23 AM		Death paper - Express delivery from Kithle!

Elina - Huh?

Sarah - What is it?

Death Paper - Dunno, but I'm supposed to read this card. Ahem: Dear Sarah and Elina,

Its high time you learned how to use these, I'd suggest Lilly as a practice target especialy when he Starts going Pah-Pah-Parn.

Sarah and Elina unwrap the package to find a pair of Hammers.

Lilly - Pah-Pa

*Double Clock*
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-27-06, 03:33 PM		Kanatash: Hm, I don't know. I'd prefer the black stormcloud option. Can you do anything about the weather? A good lighting show would have just the right ominous feel for the wedding and provide a nice lightshow to boot.
Johnny: Oh, like, no prob, man.

Johnny walks over to the FX-demon.

Johnny: Hey, man, change of plans. Rad stormclouds the whole way.
urial angel of death

09-27-06, 06:01 PM		Volrath: Ya know Nalfien this is the most lesbians and/or bi women I've seen since my grandmother tought me about sex.

Nalfien: I really don't want to know!

Volrath: Well the whole mineral-plant relations part was really wierd it started with-

Nalfien: La la la I can't hear you *hands over ears*

OOC: If you know enough about Cthulhu Mythos to know who his grandma on his father's side would be this should all make sense to you. If not I have just left you with the most disgurbing mental image possible besides tubgirl and goatse (do not google these)
Charles Phipps

09-27-06, 06:43 PM		OOC: Love the Lilly lines and Hammer bit.
rampant

09-27-06, 07:04 PM		OOC::ayyyy!: thank you thank you my adoring public- OWWWW, geeze what was that? ... Oh a brick. I'll sit down now.
------------------------------

Satnak - Oh bloody... where are the clothes?

Serene - Awwwwwww, whats wrong?

Satnak - Someone's coming.

Serene - :eek:

Satnak - Seriously where's my under...:embarrass

Serene - I'm wearing them.:D
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-27-06, 08:41 PM		Satnak - Seriously where's my under...:embarrass

Serene - I'm wearing them.:D
Silver: Isn't there a size difference between those two? I mean, like *gestures*

OOcat: Can't find their wanted posters.

13: What is it with lesbians and going at it?

Silver: Men get tired. :smirk:
Kaizer_Ryu

09-27-06, 09:11 PM		Silver: Isn't there a size difference between those two? I mean, like *gestures*
Terra: Just because there's a size difference doesn't mean it can't be fun. :devil:

Lisa: ;) I've broken more of your bra straps than you have.

Terra: :blush: :D It's not like I needed them at the time.

13: What is it with lesbians and going at it?

Silver: Men get tired. :smirk:
Terra: Like I said, totally useless.

Rose: :mad: We are not!

Lisa: While we were dating, I wondered why you agreed to Michael being in on our fun until the first night. Poor guy missed so much. ;)

Rose: I really don't want to hear it.

Terra: He passed out after an hour. I don't think we slept at all. ;)

Rose: La la la la!!! I can't hear you! I'm not listening!
urial angel of death

09-27-06, 10:06 PM		Nalfien: Hear you go Rose deafness That should keep us both sane.

Volrath: Oh my dad!

Terra: What?

Volrath: Nalfien just did something nice to someone else without asking for anything in return!

Terra: Oh dear.

*universe implodes and tries to reboot*

*after universe is rebooted and God upgrades to univ(tm) 2000*

Everything went back to normal and the Nalfiens cause deafness spells were removed from the space-time contium.

Volrath: Wow, what just happened?

Terra: I have no idea.

Nalfien and Rose: *covering their ears* La la la la not listening.

Volrath: Oh well, on a side note I never tire. ;)

Terra: True but your not a man in the strictest sense of the word.

Volrath: No I'm an innocent little schoolboy. :D I hope no rough older women take advangtage of me on my way home. :schemes:

Terra: That is disturbing on so very many levels.
rampant

09-27-06, 10:19 PM		Serene - You look so cute squeezed in there:schemes:

Satnak -:blush: Seriously its getting closer, and unless you know another person with liquid metal in them its your Dad.
--------------------

OOC: This was just too cool not to.
:lop: :fett:
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-28-06, 10:20 AM		Volrath: No I'm an innocent little schoolboy. :D I hope no rough older women take advangtage of me on my way home. :schemes:

Terra: That is disturbing on so very many levels.
Silver: Not least of which is that it'd more likely be an older man.

Volrath: ……………:confused:……………That wasn't…you know……your usual…funny.

Silver: Not everything about us is funny.
Crystalforged

09-28-06, 12:13 PM		Kanatash is in the crater/chapel directing redshirts and other expendable crew members in preperations for the wedding. There is flurry of activity all about of redshirts string nightshade along the piews and greet/feeding the horrers form beyond time which are coming through a nearby portal. Caralot walks up to Kanatash

Caralot: How are things going honey?

Kanatash: Good, very good. Preperations should be finished in the next day or two. Most of the guests are here though I'm still waiting on Nyarlathotep. Have you finished preperations?

Caralot: What perperations?

Kanatash: You know, have picked out a wedding gown and your bridesmaids?

Caralot: ...



OOC: I'll leave the dress and the bridesmaids to you, Silver, if you don't mind.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-28-06, 01:20 PM		Kanatash: You know, have picked out a wedding gown and your bridesmaids?

Caralot: ...
Caralot: Oh, I suppose I have to do that.

Kanatash: What were you expecting?

Caralot: I've told you, the church of Thyrs doesn't have a wedding ceremony. And I've never been to any weddings back on my world. The two here so far don't really help.

Silver (grabbing hold of Caralot): Don't worry, I'll help. :devil:

Bunny: And me and 13 will make sure it's "help".

Silver: :bored: Crp.

OOC: Give me a few hours, I have to go do something.
Crystalforged

09-28-06, 01:47 PM		Don't worry, I've got a D&D game tonight, it's homecoming week here, and I've got relatives visiting at the same time so its a toss up if I'll even get time to post again this weekend. I posted when I did mainly so you would have all the time you need.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-28-06, 04:36 PM		Caralot: I'm unfamiliar with this bridesmaid custom, can anyone offer me advice about who to choose and how many? Why do I need them?

OOC: Really, some hints here.
rampant

09-28-06, 04:51 PM		OOC: A retinue of Close Female Friends or Family, generally unwedded (not always), the number (usually 3+) is generally determined by the bride. Or in this case Caralot.:D

Kanatash - What are you trying to imply?

OOC: Anyway, the one in front is called the Maid (or matron if wedded) of Honor. The tradition stems from attempts to protect the bride, or confuse evil spirits, by having multiple women in fancy dresses instead of one clear target.

Kanatash - How lame is that?

OOC: Shut up ghost boy!

Kanatash - I still have some spare jumper cables.

OORampant - I have a 30 megawatt plasma cannon.

Kanatash - And yet you've managed to keep your pants.
Crystalforged

09-28-06, 04:55 PM		Kanatash: So? PSI Magnet. :D
urial angel of death

09-28-06, 05:14 PM		Silver: Not least of which is that it'd more likely be an older man.

Volrath: ……………:confused:……………That wasn't…you know……your usual…funny.

Silver: Not everything about us is funny.

Volrath: No, tentacle hentai is almost always girls. Besides my entity will protect me.

OOUrial: ...

Volrath: Right?

*music from deliverence starts playing*

Volrath: :eek:
rampant

09-28-06, 06:50 PM		OORampant - You know Rixle is still on board:smirk:

OOUrial - :evillaugh

Volrath - :mymy:
urial angel of death

09-28-06, 07:10 PM		OOC: You despite naming the most manly man you forgot to name to second place contender Mr. T (http://origin.arstechnica.com/journals/thumbs.media/mr-t.jpg)

IC:
Volrath: I gotta get out of here.

Old Man from Family Guy: Come here you musly arm.

Volrath: Ahhh P/Y/R where are you?

-------
On a sunny beach somewhere

P/Y/R: My girlfriend/caretaker senses are tingling.

grass-skirt waiter: Another pineapple wine miss?

P/Y/R: Ooooooo yes please. :) Whatever it is I'm sure Volrath can handle for alittle while longer.
rampant

09-28-06, 08:18 PM		Beryl - I wonder How much We've missed at the FF?

P/Y/R - Nothing too major aside from maybe those explosions in sharn.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-28-06, 10:15 PM		Lisa: You know...all this talk gives me an idea... :devil:

Terra: ;) Where and when?

Lisa: :smirk: Ten minutes, and you know where.

--------

*later*

Terra: *pant* *pant*

Lisa: ;) Tired already?

Terra: :P *huff* I'm doing all the *pant* work here.

Lisa: *hug* I don't see what some people's problem with tentacle hentai is at times like this.

Terra: :D They're just jealous.

Lisa: True. Ok, my turn. :schemes:

Terra: :cloud9:

--------

Sarah: Where'd our mommies go?

Elina: I'm pretty sure we don't want to know. I saw that look again...

Sarah: *shudder* How long ago?

Elina: About two hours ago.

Sarah: That means they should be back...

Terra and Lisa arrive back on deck looking rather happy.

Sarah: ...about now.

Elina: *sigh* Why do grownups-?

Sarah: Do not ask that question here. We'll inevitably be told.
rampant

09-28-06, 10:20 PM		Tirmek - Is that All adults think about?

Sarah - Since when do live here?

Tirmek - Since Lady moved her hunting territory near the Portal. I'm lucky its a holiday or I'd have missed classes.

Elina - Wait Holiday does that mean we can take these weights off?

Tirmek - actually Aunt Satanak Gave us each another fifteen pounds.

Sarah and Elina - :ghosted:
urial angel of death

09-28-06, 10:52 PM		OOC: I realy wish that Chrys would come back. He had an interesting story going. Well would anyone mind if I took over his characters until his return if it ever comes?
Kaizer_Ryu

09-28-06, 10:56 PM		OOC: I'd say you should PM him and ask if you could at least take over P/Y/R till (if) he ever comes back. I hope he does, but either way...a lonely Volrath is not a good thing. :P :D
rampant

09-29-06, 12:05 AM		Kanatash - What is so important, Chalky?

Chalky - Your Bachelor

---------------
OORampant - *cough*ette*cough*
----------------

Chalky - Party

Kanatash - :confused: :rofl:

Overlooking New Cyre, now in an eye caching shade of-
-------------------------

Kantash - And he literally painted the town red :LOL:

Caralot - Well that was sweet, if not completely missing the point.
--------------------------------------------------

Satnak - That tounge of yours adds a whole new dimension to Kissing.

Serene - Just Kissing? (mischeveous)

Satnak - Not that I wouldn't love to, but we just managed to start getting ready. We're almost out of time here.

Serene - Fine I'll give you a rest :P
---------------------

OOC: Feel free to start any time cypher
Crystalforged

09-29-06, 12:13 AM		Kanatash - What is so important, Chalky?

Chalky - Your Bachelor

---------------
OORampant - *cough*ette*cough*
----------------

Chalky - Party

Kanatash - :confused: :rofl:

Overlooking New Cyre, now in an eye caching shade of-
-------------------------

Kantash - And he literally painted the town red :LOL:

Caralot - Well that was sweet, if not completely missing the point.
OOCrystalforged: (holding a +5 vorpal newspaper) Do we have to go over this again? No, hints! Bad entity!



OOC: By the way if anyone wants to do a bachelor/bachelorette party they have my blessings.
rampant

09-29-06, 12:19 AM		OORampant - Give me back the super scope then

OOChrys - Is that what this about?

Kanatash - NO mine Its the only thing Keeping Rixle at a safe distance.

OOChrys - Why are they still here?

OORampant - Its a holiday so only Levy and Forbes had to go back for now, The rest are a big bunch of moochers so they're staying for another shot at free food.
Ultimatecalibur

09-29-06, 03:39 AM		A strange blue vortex opens in the ceiling, and a large black leather couch lands on top of the Old Man from Family Guy, crushing him. Short while later a young bishonen man wearing punk clothing, a variety of religous symbols, holds a pair of chopsticks in his mouth, a hot instant noodle cup in his left hand, a laptop on his lap, and a remote in his right hand lands on the couch.

The young man looks at vortex above him, then around and shouts - What high level god's ass do I have to kick in order to enjoy my day off?

Nyarlathotep the Crawling Chaos enters locks eyes with the new arrival and stutters - Nnnnanakkajima-dddono?!?!
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-29-06, 08:17 AM		Caralot: Okay, I think I've got the maids picked out.

Silver: Any evil spirits should be sufficiently confused. :devil:

Caralot: Just one problem: we have to have the ceremony in an open space.

Kanatash: Some other Thyrs thing or something from you family?

Caralot: No, it's otherwise my maid-of-honor won't be able to fit.

Kanatash: How big could she (or he, knowing you) be?

Caralot: The Forever Freedom.

Kanatash: Wow, is that some sort of giant sea abberration or—

Caralot: I think you're misinterpreting what I just said: the Forever Freedom.

Kanatash: :confused:……………:twitch: Your Maid-of-Honor is an awakened airship.

Caralot: She's been my family's home my entire life. I was born on her. She's the most important female figure in my life.

Kanatash: :twitch: Yeah, I'd say the evil spirits are going to be confused. So :twitch: who else.

Caralot: Okarran, as the mother of my child.

Kanatash: :twitch: :twitch:

Caralot: Jaela, my daughter. And Saberiel and Lucky, my best friends on the ship.

Kanatash: Lucky? It's not that I can't see that happening, it's just that…when?

Caralot: Oh, whenever you're busy with tormenting Krozen or something. Mostly we talk about dual-gender options.

Kanatash: What about a dress?

Caralot: Greyfeline and Johnny are handling that one. They won't let me see it till I have to wear it.
rampant

09-29-06, 10:00 AM		Rip - Mew? ( whats going on? )

Tear - Mer ( we're watching daddy hunt )

Shred - Mewl ( its really awesome )

Mittens - merow? ( though I'm not sure it helps any of us )

Fluffy is shooting down Seabirds, flying fish and the occasional air skiff. He pulls them onto a board with wheels and a rope atached. He then grabs the rope in his teeth and wheels the load home to slaypaw.
------------------------

OOC: Oh and welcome to the madness Ultimatecalibur
Kaizer_Ryu

09-29-06, 10:08 AM		Lisa: Even factoring in Dumb Wars, Satnak going mental, and one of your old nemesis' attacking us...our wedding preparations went so much more smoothly than this.

Terra: There's no flow to it. All this stuff should have been taken care of weeks ago.

OOKaizer: It just goes to show you. I ROCK at writing about this kind of thing. :D

Lisa: I was thinking more along the lines of this is Kanatash and Caralot we're dealing with. And that it's two entities writing it instead of just you.

Terra: He may have a point, though. I blinked and Satnak and Serene's wedding was over. That was done by only one entity.

Lisa: They were already married, so there was no need for a large ceremony. And this next one involves the two screwiest people on board.

OOKaizer: There's no build up! No charged atmosphere! I'm not getting what they're feeling!

Terra: *groan* Ok. I'm taking away all your shojo and magical girl manga until you start talking like a guy again.

OOKaizer: *Pedro style* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! !!!!!!
Crystalforged

09-29-06, 04:09 PM		Caralot: Okay, I think I've got the maids picked out.

Silver: Any evil spirits should be sufficiently confused. :devil:

Caralot: Just one problem: we have to have the ceremony in an open space.

Kanatash: Some other Thyrs thing or something from you family?

Caralot: No, it's otherwise my maid-of-honor won't be able to fit.

Kanatash: How big could she (or he, knowing you) be?

Caralot: The Forever Freedom.

Kanatash: Wow, is that some sort of giant sea abberration or—

Caralot: I think you're misinterpreting what I just said: the Forever Freedom.

Kanatash: :confused:……………:twitch: Your Maid-of-Honor is an awakened airship.

Caralot: She's been my family's home my entire life. I was born on her. She's the most important female figure in my life.

Kanatash: :twitch: Yeah, I'd say the evil spirits are going to be confused. So :twitch: who else.

Caralot: Okarran, as the mother of my child.

Kanatash: :twitch: :twitch:

Caralot: Jaela, my daughter. And Saberiel and Lucky, my best friends on the ship.

Kanatash: Lucky? It's not that I can't see that happening, it's just that…when?

Caralot: Oh, whenever you're busy with tormenting Krozen or something. Mostly we talk about dual-gender options.

Kanatash: What about a dress?

Caralot: Greyfeline and Johnny are handling that one. They won't let me see it till I have to wear it.
Kanatash: Well we really have more space than we need so accomidating the Forever Freedom shouldn't be an issue, however... Look I already found out about Jaela and I was happy enough to let it rest but since you've brough it up we need to talk. Now I have no problem with you having partners before me, infact I would be surprised if you didn't. It might have been nice if you had told me about them but that's not a big deal. Jaela though... I think I had the right to know you had a child from another woman, I shouldn't have had to find out from them. Thats just a really big secret to be keeping from me. If your keeping something like that from me I'm having concerns about where our relationship is heading.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-29-06, 05:19 PM		Kanatash: I think I had the right to know you had a child from another woman, I shouldn't have had to find out from them. Thats just a really big secret to be keeping from me. If your keeping something like that from me I'm having concerns about where our relationship is heading.
Caralot: :confused:

Kanatash: What? What is it this time? Why is all this weird stuff happening now?

Caralot: Because you never took the time to ask.

Kanatash: Okay, now I'm the confused one.

Caralot: I don't understand the insistance of people who think that I need to have every memory and fact carefully preserved and stored so I can take them out one by one for every new person I meet.

Kanatash: But we're about to get married.

Caralot: And how is our life going to be any different? This is probably why the church of Thyrs doesn't have marriage. Once you decide to be with someone what do you really need a ceremony for except as an excuse to throw a party?

Kanatash: I think you're trying to change the subject.

Caralot: No, Kanatash, I'm trying to teach you how I think. My thought process isn't like yours, no matter how screwed up Xoriat made it. I think in terms of practicality, and there was no reason to tell you that I had a daughter until you met her. The fact that I wasn't there to do it was just a fluke of the moment.

Kanatash: It was a secret—

Caralot: No it :censored: WASN'T! A secret is something I've deliberately kept from you. This is just something I didn't mention because I didn't think it was that important.

Kanatash: How is having a daughter not important?

Caralot: Because she normally lives in another dimension that until recently couldn't be accessed from this one. Because there's no reason to parade around the fact that I am capable of producing offspring. Because I'm not one of those parents who gets all their life-gratification through telling people what their offspring are and have accomplished. Loosen up, Kanatash, life is about living.

OOC: Okay, Crystalforged, I think Kanatash needs to be more clear about his grievance before Caralot will understand his position.
urial angel of death

09-29-06, 05:32 PM		OOUrial: See this is why I don't like democrats.

OOKaizer: Oh shut-up you right-wing jerk.

OOUrial: Come over here and say that to my face!

*Scuffle insues*

WizO_Paradox: You two have violated one the most sacred tenets of the boards.

OOKaizer: He started it!

WizO_Paradox: Who started it is irrelevent. You both mentioned real world politics. Therefore you must suffer the dire consequences. I hereby fine you twenty five dollars.

OOC: To any real WizOs watching please don't ban me, it was all done in the name of satire.
urial angel of death

09-29-06, 05:34 PM		OOC: Something I noticed was that Caralot is more and more starting to act like the one thing Kanatash hates most a hippy.
rampant

09-29-06, 05:40 PM		OORampant - :evillaugh

Kanatash - My pain has always amused you.

Kithle - :rofl:

Kanatash - Your getting a free show, no surprise there.

Volrath - *Snicker*.....Hehe...must...not...laugh

Kanatash - Ok that hurt:weep:
urial angel of death

09-29-06, 06:43 PM		OOC: Silver I hope that you don't really think the way Caralot is talking. Having some girl you don't know walk up to your father and call him dad is very hurtful. It caused one of my friends to sink into depression. While it isn't the exact same thing, they are about equal.
Crystalforged

09-29-06, 07:35 PM		Caralot: :confused:

Kanatash: What? What is it this time? Why is all this weird stuff happening now?

Caralot: Because you never took the time to ask.

Kanatash: Okay, now I'm the confused one.

Caralot: I don't understand the insistance of people who think that I need to have every memory and fact carefully preserved and stored so I can take them out one by one for every new person I meet.

Kanatash: But we're about to get married.

Caralot: And how is our life going to be any different? This is probably why the church of Thyrs doesn't have marriage. Once you decide to be with someone what do you really need a ceremony for except as an excuse to throw a party?

Kanatash: I think you're trying to change the subject.

Caralot: No, Kanatash, I'm trying to teach you how I think. My thought process isn't like yours, no matter how screwed up Xoriat made it. I think in terms of practicality, and there was no reason to tell you that I had a daughter until you met her. The fact that I wasn't there to do it was just a fluke of the moment.

Kanatash: It was a secret—

Caralot: No it :censored: WASN'T! A secret is something I've deliberately kept from you. This is just something I didn't mention because I didn't think it was that important.

Kanatash: How is having a daughter not important?

Caralot: Because she normally lives in another dimension that until recently couldn't be accessed from this one. Because there's no reason to parade around the fact that I am capable of producing offspring. Because I'm not one of those parents who gets all their life-gratification through telling people what their offspring are and have accomplished. Loosen up, Kanatash, life is about living.

OOC: Okay, Crystalforged, I think Kanatash needs to be more clear about his grievance before Caralot will understand his position.
Kanatash: (in a quiet voice) The most biggest issue here I think isn't that you have a child I never knew about but rather than the more I find out about you, the more I seem to discover there are sides to you I've never seen before. The idea that I don't really know who you are, you, who I'm about to marry. I'm worried that some day I'm going to wake up and discover you're not at all the person I thought you were. There's just so much I don't know about you, part of it is because I never asked but that's because I always had the impression that you didn't want to talk about it. That was fine for the time but now that I'm about to dedicate my life to you I start to worry about how much I don't know. More than that even from the way you talk about marrage I'm also begining to wonder if you're as devoted to me as I am to you. (pause) I think now what I really need is to spend some time alone to go over my feelings, to decide whether I want to go through with this after all. (teleports away)
rampant

09-29-06, 10:26 PM		Kithle - Before you get any more angsty, I'd --

Kanatash - I'm not in the mood for your tricks, Ithillid!

Kithle - And I'm not interested in tricking you...at least not right now.

Kanatash - :confused:

Kithle - !st thing think your other prospects at this point: Crystal.

Kanatash - Thats a good point, but-

Kithle - Shut up and let me talk before you get all wrapped up in your insane self. If caralot Were atively deciving you about anything you'd have found out. Whats really bugging you is you're worried that if a DAUGHTER, a child, her own Offspring is not worth mentioning to you, How High could you really be on her list of priorities. IS she just going to wander off find somone else and decide your not a big deal?
Am I right Scion of Xoriat?
Charles Phipps

09-29-06, 11:20 PM		Rose: In any case, Lilly, I need you to understand some things about being a warrior....

Lilly: Don't get killed?

Rose: Well that's one thing. The nex...

*Rose is hit in the head with a mast accidentally*

Zella: OH NO!

Satnak: What's wrong?

Zella: Rose got hit in the head!

Satnak:....and?

Zella: Didn't you see Six String Samurai? All bards are secretly samurai at
heart! Therefore, Rose is going to revert to his other personality. LOTUS!

Satnak: Say what?

Lotus: Yooooooo!

*jumps up in Samurai pose*

Satnak: Oh I'll just hit him aga....

Lotus: That pirate ships offends me!

*Lotus leaps over to the Forgotten Freedom II and cuts it half*

Satnak: The hell?

Zella: he also gains thirty levels.

*Lotus suddenly is weairng a kimono and playing a pipe with a big straw hat*

Satnak: This reaks of an entity getting Oriental Adventures.
Crystalforged

09-29-06, 11:27 PM		Kithle - Before you get any more angsty, I'd --

Kanatash - I'm not in the mood for your tricks, Ithillid!

Kithle - And I'm not interested in tricking you...at least not right now.

Kanatash - :confused:

Kithle - !st thing think your other prospects at this point: Crystal.

Kanatash - Thats a good point, but-

Kithle - Shut up and let me talk before you get all wrapped up in your insane self. If caralot Were atively deciving you about anything you'd have found out. Whats really bugging you is you're worried that if a DAUGHTER, a child, her own Offspring is not worth mentioning to you, How High could you really be on her list of priorities. IS she just going to wander off find somone else and decide your not a big deal?
Am I right Scion of Xoriat?
Kanatash: (sniffle) I won't deny it. That frightens me more than I can comprehend. I'd do anything for Caralot if she asked, give up destruction of reality, sever ties with Xoriat, become sane, ANYTHING. I just can't tell if I'm more than a passing fancy with her. I just don't know what to do.
cypher_zero

09-29-06, 11:31 PM		Terrek: Why don't you step into my office (door appears behind him)? Perhaps I can help...

OOC: Sorry, had to.
.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-29-06, 11:32 PM		Terra: *groan* Again?

Zella: Yeah. Maybe that will work...

Terra: It's worth a shot. Hey Lotus!

Lotus: Yes, dear sister?

Terra: Since you're a Samurai, don't you have to serve a Lord in order to retain the best elements of your class?

*Puff of Logic*

Lotus: :weep:

OOC: I don't have Oriental Adventures in front of me, so sorry if I got it wrong. I'm pretty sure that's the restriction, and it was too funny to not do it. Ignore it if you want.
rampant

09-30-06, 12:05 AM		Terra - BAD BARD!! Fix the shipe you broke! *smacks rose with newspaper*

Roosevelt - I'll supervise.
Ultimatecalibur

09-30-06, 12:26 AM		As Rose/Lotus (still in samurai mode) recovers from Terra's newspaper strike, Nakajima (the rescent asian arrival) calmly walks up behind Rose/Lotus and knocks him out with a single blow to the back of Rose/Lotus' neck.

Nakajima -- You can't just hit a samurai with a newspaper, it has to be properly folded to have any effect.
Kaizer_Ryu

09-30-06, 12:31 AM		Terra: :doh: I wasn't trying to knock him out. He's supposed to fix the ship.

Roosevelt: I am not doing this alone.

They both stare at the Newbie.

Nakajima: *anime sweatdrop* :( ...me?

Terra: Start fixing, bright boy. I'm gonna get the smelling salts.

OOC: Gotta mess with the new meat. It's standard procedure. :D
rampant

09-30-06, 02:07 AM		Nakajima - OUCH! Why do all the boards you give me have splinters.

Roosevelt - Your bad luck.

Rose - Oh shut up At least you don't have to deal with this double sided sand paper.
-----------------------------

OOC: CHYPHER! If your having trouble getting it done then save what you have a word file so your not starting over everytime.

---------------------------

Kithle - Talk to her you stupid git, Sitting over here whining is just making the problem worse you IDIOT!
Crystalforged

09-30-06, 02:56 AM		Kanatash: I know, I know. You're right it just... I'm terrified beyond all reason. Right now I'd rather face down an unending swarm of Crystal's than talk to Caralot about this. I'm afraid of what the answer might be. Still, I can't get away from the fact you're right and I know it deep down in the black morass I call a soul as well. If I don't it'll haunt me for the rest of my days. I... I'll talk to her. I just need to steel myself for whatever may come.
rampant

09-30-06, 03:20 AM		Kithle hands Kanatash a metal pipe.

Telfon steals control of Kanatash's hand and uses it to Sleight of hand Kanatash into his own pocket.:D

---------------------

OOC: I know bad puns, but I can't resist:D
Crystalforged

09-30-06, 03:49 AM		After being pulled inside his pocket, Kanatash continues the movement, turning himself completely inside out. He seems rather unphazed by this and immediately begins beating Kithle severely with the metal pipe that was just handed to him.

Kanatash: If you ever, EVER, try this sort of Magnificent Bastard Bull**** on me at a time like this again not only will I PERMANENTLY banish you to the puppet dimension, I will use Psychic Reformation to pick some levels in Cardboard Tube Samurai and give you a beating so bad it'll make what Pun-Pun did to Satnak look like a pair of prepubescent boys trying to beat each other with inflatable bats! Do I make myself clear!

Teflon: Er...

Kanatash: (whips his head around to give Teflon a glare that would make Satnak jelous) You! I'm in a particulary giving mood right now so I'm not going to hurt you so you get to just walk away but if you try that again we'll find out just how much shrappenl is produced when a warforged's head explodes. (turns to the deformed lump that was once Kithle) Oh and thank you Kithle, I feel much better now.

He wheels around and stalks out the door. On his way out he tosses the metal pipe over his shoulder which manages, perhaps by chance, perhaps not, to strike Kithle on the head one last time.



OOC: It's nothing personal Rampant, it's just that Kanatash happens to be very sensitive at the moment so needless to say he's apt to react... disproportionately... to little things like this.

Oh and, I swear it wasn't me! The inevitable that punishes bad puns made me do it!
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-30-06, 08:47 AM		OOC: Silver I hope that you don't really think the way Caralot is talking. Having some girl you don't know walk up to your father and call him dad is very hurtful. It caused one of my friends to sink into depression. While it isn't the exact same thing, they are about equal.
Complete-Honesty-OOcat: Hello, Complete-Honesty-OOcat here, speaking to you because I hope adding that name makes you take me at exactly what I'm saying. What Caralot is saying is what Caralot is, not me. From her perspective, the perspective of someone from a dimension that lives off making light of the facets of real life, even the ones that are grim. We don't call you out for killing random redshirts or giving a pedophile memories that replicate what they've done to other onto themselves, even though we think that stuff in actual life would be disguisting and vile. In context it makes us laugh. In the same vein we thought Kanatash finding out like he did would make for some amusement.

Explanatory-OOcat: I'm being dredged up so that everyone can be on the same page.
1. Caralot is Jarlot's alt from her own universe. That means that various features of his life are mirrored in her, including Jaela.
2. Most of the details of Caralot's life weren't finalized until recently. She couldn't tell Kanatash before then. We had to come up with a reason why she hadn't talked about anything from that life, and we decided that was just something she did and it makes sense to her.
3. Yes, Crystalforged knew about all of this ahead of time. It's his choice to go the dramatic way.
*******
Kanatash: (in a quiet voice) The most biggest issue here I think isn't that you have a child I never knew about but rather than the more I find out about you, the more I seem to discover there are sides to you I've never seen before. The idea that I don't really know who you are, you, who I'm about to marry. I'm worried that some day I'm going to wake up and discover you're not at all the person I thought you were. There's just so much I don't know about you, part of it is because I never asked but that's because I always had the impression that you didn't want to talk about it. That was fine for the time but now that I'm about to dedicate my life to you I start to worry about how much I don't know. More than that even from the way you talk about marrage I'm also begining to wonder if you're as devoted to me as I am to you. (pause) I think now what I really need is to spend some time alone to go over my feelings, to decide whether I want to go through with this after all. (teleports away)
Caralot (speaking to the air): Kanatash, you think that just because you're see-through that your personality is transparent? :mad: When was I supposed to know this would affect you like this? I'm not the only one who's had sides come out since we've met: in the beginning I thought you were just this crazy guy from Xoriat, someone who shared my view that things other people thought of as "weird", "freakish", "panic-inducing", were really just things that existed like everything else.

Caralot just stands there for a moment, waiting to see if Kanatash comes back. When he doesn't, she teleports herself to the southern shore of the Mournland, and wades out into the water.

Caralot (still talking to the air): Why do you have a particular hatred for pedophiles? What was wrong with your parents being hippies? I thought someone as insane as you could see past the surface.

Caralot cups some water in her hands, but it just feels dull and life-less, not like the water back home.

Caralot: :( I never understood your desire to destroy the universe, no matter how far in the future. 13 wanted to kill everyone, destroy everything, because e needed the voices in e's head to stop screaming at em to do something. Why are you doing it?

The water around Caralot begins to bubble, as if boiling. A dragon shape appears briefly in the water around her, before the water engulfs her, pulling her body under.

Caralot (still talking despite the water): Dmn it, Kanatash, do you think that just because I never thought mentioning that I had a daughter was important that I'm just going to drop you?! That if my own daughter wasn't important enough for me to mention that maybe I don't think anyone is important?!

Caralot finally allows herself to surface.

Caralot: Did I do something to make you think I'm that shallow? :(

OOC: We think it's time to point out that we write Caralot as someone who's not very aware, that she often has to have things pointed out to her. There are people like this in the world, and they aren't necessarily bad people, they are just working with what abilities they have and it fails them.
rampant

09-30-06, 11:05 AM		OORampant - Ok hats it matbe if you start getting into trouble we can get this moving.

Satnak - I got betterthings to do, Like my wife. *flick*

OORampant gets tossed into the eather between worlds.

Satnak - ITs moving off Lets get back to business.

Serene - :w00t:
Kaizer_Ryu

09-30-06, 11:32 AM		Lisa: Do you think we can help?

Terra: They need to work this out themselves. I don't think our way will work for them, anyway.

Lisa: True. They're special cases. At least this is coming out now, instead of during the honeymoon or something.

Volrath: Why won't it help Uncle Kanatash?

Terra: It requires unfettered access to each other's mind. With Kanatash, that equals a psychic lobotomy, and I have no idea what it'd be like in Caralot's mind. I've never had reason to go there, and I'm not sure I want to.

Volrath: You let Lisa wander around in your mind? You never let anyone do that. It's a rather dangerous place.

Lisa: I wasn't there by myself. I had a guard. :)

Terra: I let her take the lead, though.

Volrath: But..why?

Terra: I knew that, unless we could accept each other as we were, including all we had done, this would never work. As you once told me, my stories could have been sugar coated by self-justification.

Lisa: I still remember seeing things that bothered me, even repulsed me. But there was something I felt that outweighed all that.

Volrath: And that was...?

Terra: Pure, unadulterated fear. I had never been more terrified in my entire life. :)

Lisa: She could have easily blocked off her worst memories, but she didn't. The fact that she opened up so completely, despite such incredible fear, meant the world to me.

Volrath: You mean...you let her see the-

Terra: Yep.

Volrath: And even when you-

Terra: Uh-huh.

Volrath: :eek: You didn't let her see-

Terra: You bet I did.

Volrath: Ok, I am now completely confused as to why this works so well...

Lisa: Trust. I could have easily stomped all over her at that time. When I first came aboard, I would have. It never would have occured to me how hurtful that would have been. But I had grown up.

Volrath: What about the "stick up your ass" feat?

Lisa: You catch more with honey than vinegar. Indiscriminate smiting is not a cureall and is often counterproductive. It's what I was sent here to learn.

Terra: You have no idea how relieved I was to see that she had taken that lesson to heart. I proposed not long after.

Volrath: *sigh* :raincloud

Lisa: What's the matter?

Volrath: This conversation just reminds me that P/Y/R isn't here. You two can get some pretty much any time...

Terra & Lisa: :embarrass

Volrath: ...yet I'm stuck here all alone. *walking away* I want my sweet lovin', damnit!

Lisa: ...he took that rather well.

Terra: He doesn't quite understand yet. That's the thing about him. No matter how old he really is, he's only as mature as he appears. There are a few differences, but overall, he's little more than a 14 year old at heart.

Lisa: Which makes his relationship with P/Y/R have levels of creepy no one should be exposed to...
urial angel of death

09-30-06, 12:36 PM		OOC: Cat I would like to say that I would not consider giving a pedophile those memories to be evil in the slightest. I believe very strongly in eye for an eye and tooth for a tooth. The only crime I do not support this for is rape which should also include a castration.

As for the killing of redshirts as long as they were the horrible criminals Charles makes them out to be I'm fine with it.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-30-06, 02:14 PM		OOC: Cat I would like to say that I would not consider giving a pedophile those memories to be evil in the slightest.I believe very strongly in eye for an eye and tooth for a tooth. The only crime I do not support this for is rape which should also include a castration.

As for the killing of redshirts as long as they were the horrible criminals Charles makes them out to be I'm fine with it.
Principle-OOcat: :rant: :rant: …………………:confused:………………:rant: :rant: :rant: :rant: :rant: :rant:………:eek:……………:headexplo

"This has been an intervention by the Comittee of OOcats to Not Beat the Explosive Issues and Thus Ruin the Thread. Sorry about the mess."
urial angel of death

09-30-06, 02:15 PM		OOC: Now that I come to think about it I apologize also.
Crystalforged

09-30-06, 02:58 PM		As the water ripples before Caralot the image of Kanatash appears in the water.

Kanatash: I hate hippies because of the many years I lived with my parent's people. They knew there was imminent danger to all the world yet they refused to take action against it, to resist, to inform, to teach. Rather than be active and make a difference with whatever power they possesed they sat behind their walls doing nothing. That is why I hate hippies, they spout their ideals but refuse to act upon them. (now rising from the water) I have such a problem with pedaphiles because even when I was young I rejected my parents ways, ultimately causing me to take off on my own for a time. Things happened to me in those days, things I don't like to talk about even now. (standing on the water before Caralot) I plan to destroy reality because that is the way of the universe. The lord of madness may be "evil" as this reality defines the word but they do only that which they exist to do. All reality is a flawed thing, and over time it begins to fail. When it does it brings great suffering upon all creation until its flame finally gutters out. The Daelkyr exist as the lagaleers who clean up the mess which reality becomes when it decays too far so that it may be reborn anew. The only way in nature to ensure this process happens is to have it bring an innate pleasure to those who partake in it. I have become a part of that cycle. (looking directly into Caralot's eyes) That however is not what true;y mattern at this very moment. I know that I would sacrafice all that I am if that is what you would ask of me. What frightens me, what I want, no need, to believe is that I am not alone in these feelings. I know enough about Trys to know your people are capable of flowing from one part of your life to the next, abandoning those behind you. You mean more to me than I can comprehend and I need to know I'm not simply a passing fancy to you and that some day you won't just take off as if we never were.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-30-06, 03:52 PM		Caralot: …………………I think I understand now.

Kanatash: And your answer?

Caralot: Is that I can't guarantee that.

Kanatash: ……………………………Why?

Caralot: Because Thyrs teaches me that I can either harden against the world and ultimately become as good as dead, or flow around the world and go somewhere.

Kanatash: The water analogy isn't helping.

Caralot: All right, try another one: 13. Before this one.

Kanatash: No. It's still not enough.

Caralot: I'm trying to tell you how I act: 13 was stuck in a hell because e couldn't let the world's problems just wash over him. That what the church of Thyrs is about: realizing that you can't hold back the floodwaters of life. You have to let them flow over you, and maybe they'll wear you down, but if you hold them back they'll just break through and you'll be gone in an instant.

Kanatash: Stop it.

Caralot: What?

Kanatash: You're not answering the question! You keep trying to drown me in all these different asides when all I really want to know is whether I'm some current amusement that you're just going to drop later!

Caralot: I DON'T KNOW!

The echo hangs in the air, but now everything feels broken.

Kanatash: How…………can you not know?

Caralot: Because I don't think about why I do anything I do, I just do it. Do you think I could actually create all those hybrids that are in my books if I thought about why I did it? It's instinct and intuition Kanatash, not calculation.

Kanatash: So then I should ask your instinct?

Caralot: My instinct tells me to stay with you, that I want you. But I need to tell you something else. I need to tell you this because not telling you things got us into this. I had the same sort of feelings for Mawerrkan and Okarran. But I'm not "with" either of them. Mawerrkan is a good friend, and when I look at Okarran I feel a kind of warmth for the fact that we made a child together. But the first time was just a teenager's hormones, and the second was a shared bond of blood. I have no idea what the kind of love you're asking for feels like, so I can't give you a straight answer.

Kanatash stands there, in the water, feeling his heart crushed more and more with each word. Caralot takes the ring off her finger, but hesitates as she's about to throw it to Kanatash.

Kanatash: What now?

Caralot: I don't want to not try. I don't want to say "No", but I'm not ready to say "Yes" either.

Finally Caralot tosses the ring to Kanatash.

Caralot: Can we keep trying? Can we go on from today until we both know, one way or the other? I'm not asking you to forget that today happened, but if our relationship can't stand up to this then can it really stand? Or are you already convinced?

DISCLAIMER: The views expressed in this work of fiction should only be taken as those of the characters expressing them and not the author who is trying very hard to give the characters actual motivation and not a ham-fisted attempt at it.

OOC: Sorry if I'm messing anything up, Crystalforged.
Crystalforged

09-30-06, 05:42 PM		Kanatash: (after a long pause) So... what you're saying is that whatever you may feel now, you cannot promise that you will feel the same a month, a year, a decade from now?

Caralot: Yes.

Kanatash: (sigh) Change. I should probably apologize. While I am a being who can full well expect to witness the rise and fall of hundreds of milenia but by comparison I achieved that state very little time ago. I fear the idea of the world changing around me outside of my control, but if I expect to continue living I'm going to have to accept it sooner or later. If the day comes when the love between us has died then I will deal with that when it comes, until then I will just have to enjoy what I have now. There is only one thing I need to know however. I love you more than life itself and I need to know, at this very moment, do you feel the same way about me? I don't care if you will feel the same a year, a week, or even a day from now. All I want to know is if you feel that now.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-30-06, 06:03 PM		Caralot: Yes, Kanatash.

Kanatash waited. And waited. And waited.

Kanatash: Aren't you going to say something more?

Caralot: Nope, I think I'm good. :D

Kanatash: …………………:bored: You just broke the dramatic moment.

Anti-Drama-OOcat: Well someone had to. Lousy "drama", always trying to hog all the fun.…

Caralot walks over and takes back the ring, and slips it onto her finger.

Caralot: Let's get this party started.

Kanatash: Um, I thought you didn't want to get married yet?

Caralot: We're not. Not yet. :P But we have the makings of a party, so let's take advantage of it.

Kanatash: :blink:………………That's the Caralot I know. :D

Caralot and Kanatash lock arms as they prepare to teleport back.

Caralot: Um…

Kanatash: Anything else you want to tell me?

Caralot: I should mention that Quench is technically my son, because he has my genetics in him.

Kanatash: Any others?

Caralot: No. And I didn't mention him because I'm still not sure if he counts. I mean, he's also got Satnak's DNA.

Kanatash: *sigh* When we get back to our room, we're going to spend a long night digging up every single thing in your past.

Caralot: Oooooo, just talking. :D Kink-keh.
Crystalforged

09-30-06, 06:54 PM		Kanatash: Woman, you make me crazy sometimes. And thats what I love about you. :D Fine and after we're done talking we can try few new ideas I got from that trick you just did with the water. :smirk: The wedding can wait a few more days.
urial angel of death

09-30-06, 07:01 PM		Palom: Sis you know what this means!?

Porom: Yeah! We get to show off!

Boths: One, two, three, twin power!

Thousands of yellow, red, and white hueded meteors form and come down, screaming through the sky. Below form massive tendrils of purple and blue energy that dart amongst the meteors. They collide with meteor after meteor causing countless dazzling explosions of color.

Palom: Now entity from the stars come to me! Living Colour!

Porom: Bright light, shine down on bloody impurity! Holy!

Waves and orbs of raindow light. They dance across the sky and fill the heavens with color.
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-30-06, 07:39 PM		OCD-OOcat: WAIT! Real people can't just resolve their differences in the space of a few minutes!

Audience: *cricket chirp*

OCD-OOcat: But you can't portray people this way, it's just not right!!

Audience: *shotgun chuck*

OCD-OOcat: There's such a thing as professional responsibility to realistic characters!!!

Audience: *BANG!*

Bunny: Anyone else? Please? I want to practice my aim.

Silver: If we were realistic I wouldn't be having any fun tonight. :D

13: Anyone besides me realize we're sitting in water?
Charles Phipps

09-30-06, 08:17 PM		Lotus: I've come to share some Eastern wisdom with you Kanatash.

Kanatash: What is it you almond eyed Rice Snorting anime freak?

Lotus: YOU are a hippie.

Kanatash:....what?

Lotus: The Kalashatar you hold in disdain for the fact that they choose not to act in the face of the overwhelming evil of the Dreaming Dark. Now, here, you choose not to destroy the world for the time because you secretly love this world.

Kanatash: I do not!

Lotus: The Daelkyr are forces of nature rather than people with all their complexities and conflicting wants. There is a purity in their destruction and twistation absent from normal human beings. But, if they ever suceeded, then this world would lose many good things as well as bad.

Kanatash: Like what?

Lotus: Like...

Spike: Like humans, little Happy Meals on Legs!

Lotus: Quiet you.

Kanatash: no, he's right. In Xoriat....everyone would be tortured and there'd be no contrast to make torture horrible!

Lotus: Uhhh...

Kanatash: How could I have not seen it! Without good to torment, evil has no meaning!

Lotus: I....

Kanatash: THANK YOU LOTUS!

Lotus: :blink:

*Lotus walks away*

Satnak: You're just screwing with the samurai aren't you?

Kanatash: It takes a real moron to try to psychoanalyze ME.
urial angel of death

09-30-06, 09:43 PM		A metal figure runs over and attacks Lotus. Lotus blocks the assailant's katana. This causes the two to enter that ever so cliched sword lock in which diague takes place.

figure: I the nimble wright ninja/samuri Yoshimitsu am the only oriental character on board.
Crystalforged

09-30-06, 09:55 PM		Lotus: I've come to share some Eastern wisdom with you Kanatash.

Kanatash: What is it you almond eyed Rice Snorting anime freak?

Lotus: YOU are a hippie.

Kanatash:....what?

Lotus: The Kalashatar you hold in disdain for the fact that they choose not to act in the face of the overwhelming evil of the Dreaming Dark. Now, here, you choose not to destroy the world for the time because you secretly love this world.

Kanatash: I do not!

Lotus: The Daelkyr are forces of nature rather than people with all their complexities and conflicting wants. There is a purity in their destruction and twistation absent from normal human beings. But, if they ever suceeded, then this world would lose many good things as well as bad.

Kanatash: Like what?

Lotus: Like...

Spike: Like humans, little Happy Meals on Legs!

Lotus: Quiet you.

Kanatash: no, he's right. In Xoriat....everyone would be tortured and there'd be no contrast to make torture horrible!

Lotus: Uhhh...

Kanatash: How could I have not seen it! Without good to torment, evil has no meaning!

Lotus: I....

Kanatash: THANK YOU LOTUS!

Lotus: :blink:

*Lotus walks away*

Satnak: You're just screwing with the samurai aren't you?

Kanatash: It takes a real moron to try to psychoanalyze ME.
OOC: :clap: :rofl: :clap: Brilliant Charles. You caught Kanatash perfectly there. Someone tries to screw with his head and he just turns it back upon you tenfold. The only thing is that that IS how Kanatash sees the Daelkyr but the way he sees it is that the universe is eventually running itself into the ground and the purpose of the Daelkyr is to clear out the broken down hulk so that it can be replaced by a new reincarnation. The Daelkyr can only truely succede when the is nothing left worth saving in the world. They thought the universe was ripe back in the age of the Dakaani but were proved when the peoples united against them, now they're waiting for the world to "ripen" or more acurately "spoil."
SilvercatMoonpaw

09-30-06, 10:12 PM		OOC: :…that IS how Kanatash sees the Daelkyr but the way he sees it is that the universe is eventually running itself into the ground and the purpose of the Daelkyr is to clear out the broken down hulk so that it can be replaced by a new reincarnation.…they're waiting for the world to "ripen" or more acurately "spoil."
13: So the Daelky are the universe's janitors?

Bunny: Guess this means I have to sit in on Kanatash's side. :bored: There's going to be some serious reorganization once I get ahold of them. :emp:

Silver: Yeah, the death and decay department is not allowed to create new life. :duel:

OOcat: Will people please stop quoting the entire text? It just wastes space.
rampant

09-30-06, 10:33 PM		Serene - Hehe come here you, silly little thing.

Satnak - who you calling little-

*Knock**Knock*

Serene and Satnak Exchange Glances.

Serene and Satnak - We need another minute!!!
---------------------

OOC: Cypher?!
Crystalforged

09-30-06, 11:16 PM		Silver: Yeah, the death and decay department is not allowed to create new life. :duel:
OOCrystalforged: Well technically they're not creating new life, they're just getting the old stuff out of the way so what happens naturally can take place.



OOC: I see "someone" found the new smileys. :D
rampant

09-30-06, 11:54 PM		*STABBITTY DEATH*x2

NJ26 - Idiots:rolleyes:

Jingo - No contest

-exit-

Nakkajima - *feeble twitching*

Yoshimitsu - *bleeding*

Mickey walks in.

Mickey Nine fingers - Oy! Toss em in the cart Muradin, we'll patch them up with the rest.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-01-06, 12:08 AM		OOC: I have a question. Are we still in/around the Mournlands?
Crystalforged

10-01-06, 12:11 AM		Yes. The ships are still moored next to the crater/chaple Kanatash made. Does it matter?
rampant

10-01-06, 12:12 AM		OOC: Dude there are four ships, FF, FF2, FF(caralot), RFF. Countless spellcasters, and extra dimesional tunnels in and around all of them. If you can't get somewhere, you're not trying.
urial angel of death

10-01-06, 12:14 AM		Yoshimitsu: *gets to his knees and pleads to the heavens* Master you can't let me die like this!

A comically large shuriken flies out of nowhere and hits Yoshimitsu in the back of the head.

OOUrial: Yes I can you are a video-game spoof who has outlived his admitedly crappy joke. *retrieves shuriken*
Crystalforged

10-01-06, 12:16 AM		OOC: Dude there are four ships, FF, FF2, FF(caralot), RFF. Countless spellcasters, and extra dimesional tunnels in and around all of them. If you can't get somewhere, your not trying.
RFF? Did I miss something or am I just forgetting?
Kaizer_Ryu

10-01-06, 12:26 AM		OOC: RFF = The Really Forgotten Freedom, as seen in The Days of Wacky.

And I wanted a good reason to be there other than just the standard "because they are". You'll see why later. I may not get to it tonight. Definitely tomorrow. Nothing major, just a short thing involving character development.

OORei & OOUrial descend upon OOKaizer with Elina and Sarah's new hammers, beating him senseless.

OORei: :mad: Enough already! You're obsessed!

OOUrial: Stop it and let other people do things!

OOKaizer: *on the ground* Never!

*more senseless beating*
Crystalforged

10-01-06, 12:32 AM		Well if you want to borrow some or all of the ships I don't mind. After all Kanatash and Caralot are going to be "busy" for the next day or two. They will need to be back for the wedding though, the Forever Freedom is Caralot's maid of honor and, well, attendance of Kanatash/Caralot's wedding is NOT optional for crew members.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-01-06, 02:08 AM		OOC: Since we're already here, I don't need to borrow anything. ;) This is rather serious, but may give you some insight as to how Elina percieves the world around her.

IC:

The gray mist of the Mournland hangs some distance away from the wedding site. A lone figure can be seen standing dangerously close to it.

Elina: :( Why? Why do you remain here?

She cocks her head slightly to the side, as if listening to someone, yet no words are heard.

Elina: And bring about more like yourselves?

Again, she listens.

Elina: Your lives are over. Your country no longer exists. The war has ended for you. Even your souls have moved on.

The mist's surface roils, as if seething in anger.

Elina: So you prey on those who would seek to understand this tragedy? You would punish those whose curiosity got the better of them?

Crackles of energy, barely perceptible, course through the mist before her.

Elina: So long as you cling to this place, your hopes will never be realized.

The mist seems to reach out, forming into a great many hands, hoping to grab hold of her. She backs away only enough to avoid their grasp.

Elina: No matter how much you plead, I cannot help you. I can only hear your cries of pain. The one who did this to you is gone, your screams of vengeance have no target. Please, let go of this world. You no longer have a place here...

She turns to leave, only to have the mist spirits ensnare her. She screams in surprise and fear, begging them to let her go. Her pleas go unanswered as they attempt to drag her into the mist. A burst of wind and magic frees her, and Elina falls forward into Lisa's arms. Terra flies above them, dispersing the last of the mist spirits.

Elina: *sobbing* It's not their fault, Momma! It's the mist!

Lisa: *stroking her hair* I know, dear. I know.

Lisa picks her up and begins heading back to the ships as Terra lands beside them.

Terra: It is curious, though. You can see them and even hear them within the mist. They seem attracted to you like moths to a flame. Yet they do not affect others...

Elina: They whisper to unwary adventurers, leading them to their deaths, or send monsters to kill those they deem unworthy to enter here. They also said I could set them free. I...I don't know how, though. I just wanted to help...

OOC: This is the kind of thing I meant when I said she had a connection to the spirits of the world. Those that only exist as memories, burned into the place where they died, are as real to her as any other living person. Battlefields, disaster sites, and other places of great pain bother her with the wails of the victims memories. I can think of no place with a higher concentration of such pain as the Mournlands. I thought it'd be an interesting take to have the mist itself twist the memories of it's victims into tortured spirits that prey on the living, yet wish only for release.
Ultimatecalibur

10-01-06, 04:08 AM		Nakajima (getting back to work on the FF2) -- *cursing* Wish I had my computer.

Rose/Lotus (working with Nakajima) -- Whats a Kom-pu-ter?

Nakajima -- A device that allows me to summon and control various gods, demons and other supernatural beings using a complex language that most wielders of magic barely understand.

Rose/Lotus -- Sounds like a device that allows you to use truespeak. A hideously complex language that allows the speaker to alter reality.

Nakajima -- (chuckle) Like saying <run program : summon angel> is going to do anything.

(a very much female astral deva wearing bondage gear appears)

Astral deva -- Master, what may I do for you?

Nakajima (stunned quickly recovers and smiles) -- Hey, Rose do you want something to drink?

--short time later--

Rose and Nakajima are laying on deck chairs and drinking mixed drinks as an army of outsiders of all alignments working together to repaire the ship.

Rose -- I can't believe you got a Solar and Balor working together, much less to be within 3 miles without one of them attacking the other.

Nakajima -- This isn't anything. I have a whole pantheon of goddesses cleaning my house.
Crystalforged

10-01-06, 04:35 AM		OOKanatash: (in a naval unform) Captain, we're detecting a fourth wall breach in sector three! It's something new, like nothing I've ever seen before!

OOCrystalforged: (also in uniform but with a bigger hat) Identify and contain. I want to know what we're dealing with here, dammit! We may have discovered a brand new entity ripe for the picking. We must drag his soul down into the abyss of this thread before he has a chance to escape! mobilize the forces!

OOKanatash: :rolleyes: Such the drama queen. Are you quite done now? I honestly don't know why I put up with your crazy antics sometimes.

OOCrystalforged: Because if you don't I have the power to make your life a living hell?

OOKanatash: Hey, that isn't a one way street you know. You know as well as I do that if I start talking to you you just can't help but respond, even in public.

OOCrystalforged: So? They'll think I'm crazy, I tell people that already all the time.

OOKanatash: Fine, fine. I really don't care anymore, it's not worth the fight. Now if you'll excuse I need to go see how Caralot feels about men in uniform. ;)



OOC: Oh, yes, Ultimatecalibur, since I haven't gotten around to it until now: welcome, we are the FF, prepare to be assimilated. :P
Charles Phipps

10-01-06, 05:07 AM		Rose: In any case, I must confront my inner nature and conquer it. Okay, Lotus, let's talk this out Fight Club style.

Lotus: 私はかなりきれいな女の子である

Rose: ...the hell?

Lotus: I said I was a pretty pretty girl.

Rose: okay...why would you say that?

Lotus: To screw with you.

Rose: In any case, if I shoot myself in the head with a crossbow, you'll die.

Lotus: That's dumb.

Rose: I admit, it doesn't..

Lotus: Crossbows do only 1d8 damage.

Rose: Eh?

Lotus: 強力地下牢及びドラゴンの法律はである。

Rose: Okay, you're really ticking me off with that font.

Lotus: You can translate it at Babelfish if you're so damned interested. In any case, its time to institute Operation Mayhem.

Rose: What? You're a samurai, you can't be an anarchist!

Lotus: Like hell I can't.
Ultimatecalibur

10-01-06, 06:08 AM		Nakajima -- not to interupt your inner conflict that when completed will enhance your abilities, but your crew seems to be making bets on which personality comes out on top.

Rose/Lotus -- So?

Nakajima -- Currently the odds place Lotus as the favorite, a new personality showing up and smaking both of you around is the second most favored and there is a lot of heavy betting against Rose winning.

OOC -- Thanks for the welcome.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-01-06, 09:30 AM		OOC: I see "someone" found the new smileys. :D
OOC: They still have no anime-sweat-drop smiley! This is unforgivable!

Silver: And making new "life-forms" counts as making new life.

13: Can daelkyr have children the usual way?

Volrath: Tentacles. :devil:

13: Right. My bad.
urial angel of death

10-01-06, 12:08 PM		Nalfien is wandering the hals with little to do. He doesn't care about the wedding and his only friends were gone.

Nalfien: Bored, bored, bored!

A flash of light and smoke goes off in front of him. When it clears it reveals a small elf boy with snow white skin skin and purple hair. His is wearing blue robes covered with astrnomical figures.

Boy: Hello master I am here to begin my training. :)

Nalfien: What the hell are you talking about?

Boy: Well you see master every mage of Mistian descent not currently on a mission for the queen must train an apprentice if called to. You were selected to- Hesian! Chromatic Orb!

An orb of energy appears in the boy's hands. It then rockets toward a gnomish redshirt theat had just rounded the corner. The gome falls over dead with a baseball sized hole through his forehead.

Nalfien: *inspects corpse* Nice shot. There are a thousand reasonable answers but why did you kill him?

Boy: Because he was a gnome. Gnomes are part of the Hesians and are by their nature the worst enemies of Maglin like us.

Nalfien: Slow down. That country are you from?

Boy: Mistia.

Nalfien: What is the world called?

Boy: Gaia.

Nalfien: What would happened if I refused to teachb you?

Boy: The Geas would activate.

Nalfien: What would happen if I dispelled the Geas?

Boy: It would activate for you trying to dispel it. Master I apologize if I came at an bothersom time. I'll try not to get in the way.

Nalfien: Alright then one last question. What is you name?

Boy: Kerrith, master.

Nalfien: Alright everything seems to be in order. Run along then. You should go study in the library before we start the real teaching. The library is down this hall third door on the left.

Kerrith: I'll do that master.*runs off*

Nalfien: I should have probably told him not to kill gnomes. Not like it's gonna hurt anything.

------

Back in Mistia.

wizard 1: So you sent that kid off to his new teacher.

wizard 2: Yup.

wizard 1: Who is it?

wizard 2: I have no idea.

wizard 1: What do you mean by that?

wizard 2: I have found my job much easier if I just cast detect magic in a random direction and send the kids in to where ever detects strongly.

---------------

Kerrith LN with good tendencies 4th level conjurer (second edition rules) elf (drow)

He is currently Nalfien's apprentice. Because of this he will only refer to Nalfien as master and believe Nalfien to be the wisest and most inteligent wizard to exist. He will refute any evidence to the contrary.

He does not seem to be from Eberron and this causes quite a few cultural problems. First and foremost he views all gnomes, halflings, orcs, dwarfs, and humans as horrible killers. He calls them all Hesians and has a very hard time telling each race apart except by height. Thus he could not tell a gnome from a halfling or a human from an orc.

He is part of a race that while called drow have white skin pigment. He believes Nalfien to be of the same race because of Nalfien's paleness. Seeing an elf would come as quite a shock to hism because he believe them to have been extinct to several hundred years. He also views all minotaurs, gobliniods, kobolds, and half-dragons as friends though thinks of them as slightly lowwer than his race in social rank.

OOC: I have already gone over this with Rei, and he's fine with it. Hope you have fun with him. :D :emp:
Charles Phipps

10-01-06, 02:22 PM		OOC: Glad you're here Ultimate.
Ultimatecalibur

10-01-06, 02:52 PM		Nakajima -- (looking at Rose/Lotus) I wonder what we should call him once the personalities merge? Rotus? Lose?

(Various crewmembers place even more bets on the outcome)
rampant

10-01-06, 04:04 PM		Kithle - No matter what you'll always be our spoony bard.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-01-06, 04:40 PM		Sarah, Elina, and Tirmek lounge in Erk's Place, trying a few of the new dishes Tony has been working on (Rose was about ready to keelhaul him if he didn't start making more than just those damn frosted corn flakes in milk).

Sarah: What's that?

Elina: He said it was some kind of stew he invented with vegetables from the Reaches, seasonings from Q'barra, and meat from Aundair. Tastes like beef, but you never know.

Tirmek: I'm having difficulty identifying this casserole. I swear it's looking at me.

Elina: It's a variation of a recipe he got in Droaam. It's apparently really popular in Graywall. What'd you get?

Sarah: He thought I wasn't getting enough seafood, so he gave me a dish made with fish from the Bitter Sea. It's pretty good. I just wish it'd struggle like the calamari from Riedra.

Elina: *hissing quietly* Don't say good! You know what'll ha-

Tony: Good?!

Elina: *sigh* Too late...

Tony: IT'S GRRRRRRRRREAT!!!

NJ26: Damnit! We almost had a record!

She walks over to a sign that reads "Days since Tony said You-Know-What:__". The number reads 5, but returns to zero as she hits a switch.

Mendova: There's always next time...
rampant

10-01-06, 06:20 PM		Elina - You wanna practice?

Sarah - Sure, Oy Tirmek Can you ref?

Tirmek - Fine.

Elina and Sarah Dash off to put on the extra weights and pads used in their Haz'rak teams' practices.

Tirmek - Here use these.

Tosses a small stone with an x clawed into it to both.

The girls hide the stones at opposite ends of the ship, then return to the middle.

Tirmek - As this is one on one we will use a turn based system. You may only score on your turn. You may not take the totem during your opponents turn. No negative energy. Begin!!
Charles Phipps

10-01-06, 06:34 PM		Rose: Okay, we've reached a bit of a dente.

Lotus: First rule, nobody talks about Samurai Club.

Rose: Are you STILL doing that?

Lotus: Second rule, nobody talks about Samurai Club.

Lilly: Ohayo!

Rose: You've perverted my son!

Lotus: Third rule, everyone fights!

Rose: Oh lordy...in any case, I've decided in order to discover where this weird alternate personality has come from that we're heading to the Eldeen Reaches after the wedding nobody cares about.

Kanatash: I care very much about our wedding!

Rose: Why?

Kanatash: Because....

Rose: Uh huh. Well you're married by the power invested in me by being the Captain. Just like how Doog and Ishmael Junior are married now.

Ishmael Junior: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Rose: I've got to rediscover my past when I was a farmboy and everytime I told the owner's daughter "as you wish" it was really "I love you."

Lotus: I remember her well, she always made rice!

Rose: She did not!
Chrys

10-01-06, 08:38 PM		OcChrys: My head Hurts... and why are my eyes bleeding...

OcUrial Thats what you get for reading the whole new thread in one sitting... now Sign here.

OoChrys What? Oh right, I here by give author ship of P/Y/R and Beryl to you... Now then I need to Work on making a few new people...

OOChrys Sorry all... for some reason I could see the eberron fourm for a few a bit... Mainly because I was mazed...But I got out...

:lop:

OOChrys :hides:
Kaizer_Ryu

10-01-06, 08:55 PM		OOC: Welcome back, Chrys. As you can probably tell, your return was eagerly awaited by all. Volrath was sad :( .

Well, maybe "sad" is the wrong word for him. More like "wanted vengeance for keeping his sweetie from him". :D

Now go get some aspirin, lie down for a while, and take it easy for the day you crazy, crazy man. I think reading all 42 pages of this madness in one day borders on self-abuse. ;)
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-01-06, 09:00 PM		Bunny: A new killer guy? :devil: Y-ESSSSSSSSSS!!!! BRING IT ON!

OOcat: Something's starting to bug me.

Bunny: :bored:

OOcat: You don't like having to do more work, which is why you don't like people creating undead.

Bunny: It's because undead aren't any fun when they die. I like killing live people.

Silver: Think we should follow Rose on his special quest?

13: Hell yes! It's my job to annoy him!

Silver: It's your job to annoy anyone.

13: But the FF captains are special! And Rose is a spoony bard, whatever that means! Besides, we know you'll be going.

Silver: Bunny has his idols, I have mine. :D

OOC: Great work on using Erk's Place characters. I'm not very good at that sort of stuff. Though Tony is never supposed to speak a sentance without "They're GRRRRRRREAT" in it, so that essentially means he wasn't talking for 5 days.
Ultimatecalibur

10-01-06, 09:20 PM		Nakajima -- Damn, I wanted to see if I could help out with Kanatash's bachelor party.

Kanatash -- How where you planning to help?

Nakajima -- Well I was going to see if I could summon some of my cleaning staff, but I guess I can't now.

Kanatash -- Why would you do that? I don't have a maid fetish.

Rose/Lotus -- Wait, Nakajima didn't you say earlier that you used goddess to clean your home?

Nakajima -- Yes, and several of them have exotic dancing in their portfolios, and I figured that no one could top bringing several goddesses of stripping to a party.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-01-06, 09:25 PM		OOKazier: The term Spoony Bard comes from Final Fantasy 4. You remember Edward, the Bard who had the unfortunate run in with the hick Imps?

13: Kind of. The same universe Palom and Porom are from?

OOKaizer: That one. When it was first translated for the SNES, there was a mix up and he was referred to as a Spoony Bard in a rather tense scene. It became so famous that Square decided to leave it like that when it was remade for the PSX.

13: But what does it mean?

OOKaizer: No idea. But one can safely assume that it is a derogatory term for Bards.

13: Isn't calling someone a Bard derogatory in and of itself?

OOKaizer: Ususally, yes, but with Serene around, we needed a formal insult. If your entity ever played FF4, you'd see just how completely and utterly useless Edward is. Imagine having a party made out of Aragorn, Gandalf, Legolas, and Gimli from Lord of the Rings.

13: Ok...

OOKaizer: Now imagine that Pip from Great Expectations joins the group in a quest to rid the world of evil.

13: *barely restrained laughter*

OOKaizer: Now imagine he comes to the party horribly maimed to the point of being unable to care for himself. You are now just barely scratching the surface of how useless Edward is. He is the Spoony Bard all other spoony Bards are measured against.

*****

Terra: You can still do it. He's just being Spoony again.

Nakajima: :D Really?

Terra: Just keep me out of it.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-01-06, 09:38 PM		OOC: Great work on using Erk's Place characters. I'm not very good at that sort of stuff. Though Tony is never supposed to speak a sentance without "They're GRRRRRRREAT" in it, so that essentially means he wasn't talking for 5 days.
Thank you, thank you. All in a days *WHACK* OW! Ok, I'll shut up.

The idea of that sign was just to show how annoying hearing some version of "They're GRRRRRRRREAT!" in every sentence is. Whether he was talking without saying it, or not saying anything at all was up to you. I guess he just played the silent routine. I mean, he was working on his repertoire of recipies, so maybe he was just cooped up in the kitchen the whole time. :D

Now that I think about it, putting the sign as reading "1" would have been funnier.
Ultimatecalibur

10-01-06, 09:46 PM		Nakajima -- Why would I drag you into it?

Terra -- In order have me break my wedding vows.

Nakajima -- One I do not care if your married, Two I am not dying to know if your my type, and at a distant 3rd I am not interested in your magic.

Terra -- Are you trying to make a pass at me?

Nakajima -- Simply no. I have enough women in my life, and I don't need any more.

OOUltimate -- Anyone know the Edgar/Terra conversation in FF6 that I am trying to reference? I want to get the 3 resons that he was interested in her right.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-01-06, 09:55 PM		OOC: Very close. But the first reason wouldn't fit as well as what you put.

IC:

Terra: *pulls out her wings* That's good, but you seem to have a thing for Angels and Demons. Since I'm part of both, I figured I'd nip it in the bud.

Nakajima: How does that work?

Terra: Don't ask me. *points at OOKaizer* He's the one doing things not in the RAW.

OOKaizer: :D What can I say? I love dichotomies.
urial angel of death

10-01-06, 09:56 PM		P/Y/R: Volrath I'm back!

Volrath: :cheer: :dancin: :love: :cloud9: :w00t: :drool: :inlove:

P/Y/R: Stop staring. I have some "tension" you need to get rid of. Come down to the library and give me a "massage".

Volrath: *giddy with excitement and unable to speak as he runs down the stairs.*

--------

A few mintues later Kerrith is walking through the bookcases. He is about to round the corner when a very primal and deep rotted part of his brain begins to scream with all its might got him not to. He then turns in the other direction and walks out the library's back exit. Just as he leaves Terra walks past.

Kerrith: :uh-huh: :shocked: :OMG! :ghosted:

Terra: What's with him?

Kerrith: *regaining consiousness* Ohmygodohmygodohmygodyou'reanelfanelfbut you'realldeadthecataclismyouwerealldeady ou- *faints*
Ultimatecalibur

10-01-06, 10:41 PM		OOUltimate -- Nakajima would not be to impressed by a half-angel/half-demon human, he has had to baby sit a child that was 2/3 god 1/3 human. So Kaiser could you correct that?

Nakajima (looking at the completely repaired, overhauled and pimped out Shin Forgotten Freedom 2 Kai) -- All summoned creatures your next order is <return to your homes and don't kill each other>

All the creatures begin to return to their own realms.

Nakajima (picks up a thick instruction manual) -- Rose, we can leave when you are ready. (reading the manual)
Kaizer_Ryu

10-01-06, 10:50 PM		OOC: She's an elf, not human. (nit picky, I know) But I wasn't trying to imply that he was impressed per say, just that her wings make her look even hotter than she is already. :D That, and a Half-Celestial/Half-Fiend doesn't make a lot of sense (read "is impossible") if you play by the rules. I'll still take it out, though. I just kind of threw it in there as a self-serving commentary on my character anyway. ;)

I quote SilvercatMoonpaw: Rules are made to be broken. With as much force as possible.
Ultimatecalibur

10-01-06, 11:03 PM		OOUltimate -- No problem Kasier. For anyone wondering, Nakajima is named after the first Digital Devil Summoner from the MegTen series.

Nakajima -- I must really stand out, better find myself a change of clothes.

Nakajima (grabing a random redshirt) -- Where are the guest rooms?

The redshirt gives him a series of directions

Nakajima -- Thanks. (Drops the redshirt off the ship)
Rei32491

10-01-06, 11:24 PM		Kerrith: *regaining consiousness* Ohmygodohmygodohmygodyou'reanelfanelfbut you'realldeadthecataclismyouwerealldeady ou- *faints*
Nalfein: (to Terra) GREAT! YOU BROKE MY APPRENTICE!

Terra: And?

Nalfein:*his mouth not following the words* You have disgraced my people! We shall engage in combat!

:duel:

OOC: :cookie: to whoever gets the reference.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-01-06, 11:39 PM		As Nakajima heads down the hall, he dashes to the side to avoid two young girls running full speed in the other direction. The pink-haired one carries a stone. Both are clad in weights that would seem to make the speed at which they were going impossible for ones so young.

Sarah: Come back here with that!

Elina: Not a chance! *warp wood*

A hole opens up in the floor just beneath Sarah as the wood twists.

Sarah: Crap! Not again! *falls*

Elina: Ha-ha!

A thunk is heard as Sarah embeds her sword into the wall of the hall underneath. She flips up and lands gracefully on her feet.

Sarah: :devil:

Elina: :eek: Run away!

They take off further down the hall, the sound of Redshirts scrambling for cover preceeding them.
Ultimatecalibur

10-02-06, 12:16 AM		Nakajima -- (turns around) Looks like someone needs to handle a couple of overpowered children.

-- short time later --

Elina is sprinting down the hall followed shortly by Sarah when suddenly they slip roll about 40 feet and crash into a wall next to a smirking Nakajima.

Sarah -- What happened?

Elina -- I thought you did that.

Nakajima -- You two must be Terra's kids, right?

Sarah and Elina (at the same time) -- Yep, she's our Mom.

Sarah -- Who are you, Mister Girly Man, and why did you mess up our game?

Nakajima (Anime Sweat Drop) -- My name is Nakajima, and stopped you because you put a rather large whole in the floor a just after I finished fixing the ship.
rampant

10-02-06, 01:10 AM		Tirmek - Is that all? Fix it again, or get the bear.

Nakkajima - You are a rude one.

Tirmek - And you are an ignorant one.

Elina - These ships take more damage than that all the time. Roosevelt lives for carpentry.

Sarah - You probably just got suckered newbie.

Tirmek - I guess this counts as intereference. Restart Turn.

Elina - Righ in the middle of our tie breaker.

Sarah - Jerk.:P
Ultimatecalibur

10-02-06, 02:06 AM		Nakajima -- <command Sarah, Elina : repair all damage caused by game>

Sarah and Elina blink then turn to look at each other.

Elina -- Never mind were going to call it a tie. Come on Sarah lets find Roosevelt and ask him how we can clean up.

Sarah (looking a Nakajima) -- Uh, ah... sure coming.

Tirmek stunned looks at Nakajima who has a big grin on his face.

Tirmek (neverously) -- What did you do?

Nakajima (still smiling) -- <command Tirmek : follow any and all directions of an crewmember ranked redshirt or above for the next day>(turns to a passing redshirt and whispers) You can now order him around. Have fun.

Nakajima then walks off towards the guest rooms.

Tirmek (looks at the smiling redshirt, then looks at Nakajima walking away) -- Hey what did you say to him?

Nakajima -- Nothing much. Just that he and anyone equal or higher ranking than him can order you around for the next day.
rampant

10-02-06, 02:35 AM		Tirmek - HHHmmmmm *fling**fling*

The redshirt's vocal chords have been slashed.
Nakkajima dodges, but loses hair.

Tirmek - You will undo your bind on the girls, then I will do to you what I only wish I could have done to my father Toren the Seventh God, Lord of Fear. Rip your still beating heart out and eat it while you look on in horror. If I even think you're trying something I'll Smear you accross the floor boards, then break your Sword Samurai. Your command spell forces me to obey not to lose my own initiative. I'm not really familiar with how rank works here, for All i know that guy was your superviser nulling any authority your spell might give you. Now release the girls before I do something you won't enjoy.
---------------------------------
OOC: Not saying he could, but mind control is a sore point for Tirmek, so he will try.
Paulon

10-02-06, 02:43 AM		*watches the manipulation of the children from the viewing gallery, winces, and draws curtains made from Pun-pun's hide across to ward off the likely explosion when the parents notice...*
Ultimatecalibur

10-02-06, 04:06 AM		Nakajima -- *sigh* <command Tirmek : perform pushups till told to stop or extreme musculer/skeletal damage happens>

Tirmek begins to perform pushups.

Nakajima -- Hey Half-God, that was not mind control, but a very forceful suggestion. I have a tendency to tell greater gods what to do, You, barely a half of a god, can't really argue with me, but smart move killing the redshirt. (starts walking off) Oh, by the way, I am not a Samurai.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-02-06, 07:16 AM		OOC: …I quote SilvercatMoonpaw: Rules are made to be broken. With as much force as possible.
OOcat: Why does anyone think that celestials and fiends couldn't get together? And that they couldn't have viable offspring?

13: They have rules-Nazis in their heads. Whereas you created Caralot.

OOcat: :D
Kerrith: *regaining consiousness*Ohmygodohmygodohmygodyou're anelfanelfbut you'realldeadthecataclismyouwerealldeady ou- *faints*
13: Silver? I need to borrow you. :devil:

OOC: Silver looks like a teenage female elf.
********
OOcat: <edit Erk, Tony, NJ26, Saberiel, Igor, Roosevelt, JJ, Lucky, Caralot : loophole to Nakajima program. security program creation : duplicate Nakajima, install Inevitable hardware, install "phenominal cosmic power is to be used responsibly or have limits" core command, install "phenominal cosmic power source".>
rampant

10-02-06, 09:58 AM		Tirmek Performs a hand stand an begins doing the push-ups vertically on one hand at a time managing to lurch forward each time.

Nakkajima - What the hell? You're kidding me!

Tirmek - I...am...going...to...hurt...places...yo u...didn't...even...know...you...had.

Nakajima - I'm going to have to be a little more specific.

Tirmek - (drawing closer) Release the girls now! Or I swear by my Mother's thorns I'll KILL YOU!
Kaizer_Ryu

10-02-06, 10:27 AM		Sarah: Calm down, Tirmek.

Tirmek: *still doing pushups* Wha?

Elina: We have an Entity. Such commands don't work on us.

Tirmek: *stops* ...I really should have figured that out.

Nakajima: :confused: If it didn't work, why did you obey?

Sarah: We just wanted to continue our game. Since you're messing with the ref, we had to come back.

Elina: Besides, if you thought what we did was bad, you should see what Nalfein, Pholly, and Phollie do on a daily basis.

Gigantic explosions are heard throughout the ship, followed by drunken ranting on Mickey's part and a loud, annoyed screech from Squishy.

Nakajima: What are the chances of that?

Elina: It's called a Narrative Element. If it's funny, it will happen at the exact right time. Often immediately after being mentioned.

Sarah: Now, Mr. Samurai Guy, can you fix the ship for us?

Sarah & Elina: *innocently* Please? :bigeyes:

Nakajima: *through clenched teeth* No...must...resist...adorable...children ....

Elina: Wow. He's good.

Sarah: Back to the game, then! :D

Elina & Sarah: *throughout the ship* :duel:

Tirmek: :emp:

*******

Humor-OOKaizer: Tense standoff has been neutralized, sir.

Command-OOKaizer: Good work, soldier.

Biased-OOKaizer: As if anyone could control them...

Command-OOKaizer: Sir Phobos!

Let-Other-People-Mess-With-The-Characters-OOKaizer: *raises bat*

Biased-OOKaizer: :mymy: :eek: :gah:
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-02-06, 10:51 AM		Humor-OOKaizer: Tense standoff has been neutralized, sir.

Command-OOKaizer: Good work, soldier.

Biased-OOKaizer: As if anyone could control them...

Command-OOKaizer: Sir Phobos!

Let-Other-People-Mess-With-The-Characters-OOKaizer: *raises bat*

Biased-OOKaizer: :mymy: :eek: :gah:
Self-Depreciating-OOcat: You idiot! It's spreading!

Share-My-Pain-OOcat: Good.

Mischevious-OOcat: Heeheeheeeheehheehhehhehehehhehehehehehh ehe!
Chrys

10-02-06, 11:01 AM		OoChrys is float pacing back and forth, thinking to think of a new crewmate. Then he stops gets an evil grin and Dashes off…

Later in the depths of a manifest zone of the Fey Court, he is wearing a Doctor Mario outfit. He then starts to order some of the germs around.

OoChrys: Ok First I need a seed from the world tree, and a bronze wood tree and a live wood tree…

Red Germ: Got it Dude, Blue Germ: Yeah totally rad man, Yellow Germ: Narf

They then throw the stuff in to a large pot.

OoChrys: Ok Now I need, a Warforged scout, a warforged Titan and all those warforged components that allow changing forms.

Red Germ: Got it Dude, Blue Germ: Yeah totally rad man, Yellow Germ: Point

They then throw the stuff in to a large pot.

OoChrys: Hmmm not enough construct bits… Get me Starscream and Devastator. Oh and those Dice people what are they called… Mordons; Ok toss them in

Red Germ: I’ve so got the munchies Dudes, Blue Germ: Yeah let's get a pizza after this, Yellow Germ: Egad!

They then throw the stuff in to a large pot, it then bubbles and changes colors.

OoChrys: Ok now for the fun stuff…Get my DVDs * ominous thunder * Ok so throw in My Steel Angel Kurumi and Outlaw Star Box sets, and my Negima and Tenchi Muyo GPX… oh what the hell throw In the UFO Ultramaiden DVDs too.

Red Germ: Dude what about the one in the black box, Blue Germ: You know one with the whips and … Yellow Germ: Fjord!

OoChrys: What… I though I used them all when made P/Y/R… I mean no… oh all right but Just the excel saga spin off DVD.

They then throw the stuff in to a large pot, it then bubbles and changes colors again…then the pot starts to rattle.

OoChrys: Now for the last bit * tosses in Okami and Rocket slime games*

Then like any good mixture when the last bit is thrown in; it explodes with a pyroclastic light. Then after the smoke cleared a small seed stood where the pot once stood.

OoChrys: IT IS ALIVE!

Red Germ: Dude WTF, Blue Germ: It’s just a seed, Yellow Germ: Zort!

OoChrys: Duh, now go give this to Eiko… and tell her think of a name.
Ultimatecalibur

10-02-06, 11:17 AM		Nakajima (smiling) -- Interesting they must be aspects of at least 3 over gods, possibly more. This will be fun. (shakes his head) Didn't expect that Tirmek character to figure out that I was limiting the commands, but maybe he didn't. (Looks at Tirmek as he folllows after the two girls) Those 3 did show me that this truespeak stuff has a limit relative to how much it is against the personality of whomever it is used apon. (Walks into one of the guest rooms) Looks like I am going to be constantly called a Samurai while I am here. If so I better look the part.

OOC -- I wanted to see just how long it would take Tirmek to figure out all he had to do was get a redshirt to tell him to stop doing pushups, but having him start doing chinese pushups was even better.
rampant

10-02-06, 11:21 AM		OOC: Tirmek does lots of push ups anyway, he was more concerned about getting the mind control, at least thats what he percieved it as, to stop. He is prone to rants about how vile it is, and it always reminds him of the father he hates so much.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-02-06, 11:24 AM		Explaination-OOKaizer: Aspects? Naw. We entities are beyond the gods, yet we are not as powerful. We just like messing with whomever we can.

Self-Serving-OOKaizer: And the split personality thing is not spreading! We've been like this the whole time!

Command-OOKaizer: You're just jealous you didn't think of it first.

Self-Serving-OOKaizer: No, really! I swear! He totally stole the idea from me.

Command-OOKaizer: Do you want to go in The Room with Canon and Biased?

Self-Serving-OOKaizer: :eek: :eek: :eek: I'll be good...
Chrys

10-02-06, 11:40 AM		OoChrys::eek: Wow Now I'm kinda glad I got rid of my other personalies, Highlander Style :duel:

OoGambelingChrys There Can Be Only One!

OoGambelingChrys charges OoChrys with a great sword... only to have it head bit off by a hyrda.

OoChrys Yeah never bring a sword to a Hydra fight. ;)
Ultimatecalibur

10-02-06, 11:47 AM		OOUltimate -- He was not talking about you, Kazier, but the 2 girls.

Nakajima (changed into a traditional samurai outfit, is looking at a sheathed Katana) -- Didn't expect to find you here, and no one else better show up. (Seems to listen to something) They did what? I had better figure out a way to get home ASAP, but Murphy will most likely make it take forever. (falls into the hole that was created during his first incounter with Sarah and Elina) See?
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-02-06, 02:41 PM		OOC: Ultimatecalibur, you do realize that if you want something to be taken really out of the story universe then you have to preface it "OOC" rather than "OO(yourname)".

OOcat: Of course, for some of us the walls have already fallen. :D

OOC: Yes they have, masters. What do you wish of me?

OOcat: Fight yourself to the death. :devil:

OOC: Yes, masters.
cypher_zero

10-02-06, 03:25 PM		OOC: Ok, first to dispel any rumors to the contrary, I am not dead. I have just been… busy. :schemes: Anyways, a brief intro from me for Ultimate and a bit of advice: I am Cypher. Fear me or know my wrath :evillaugh! My characters include Terrek, Serene and (I guess since I hijacked her…) Sara. Rampant usually controls Serene so she is as much his character as mine at this point. Terrek is my own and I ask that you don’t mess with him. I ask this of everyone so don’t think I’m singling you out. As per the advice… make sparing use of your char’s little <command: > thing. In my opinion, it just plain shouldn’t work on any of the Ubers simply on principle, but that’s up to their respective owners to decide. Since I ask people not to mess with Terrek to begin with… This shouldn’t be a problem.

Now, without further ado, the banquet (or at least part of it).

Serene: Hehe come here you, silly little thing.

Satnak: Who you calling little-

*Knock**Knock*

Serene and Satnak exchange glances.

Serene and Satnak: We need another minute!!!

The door cracks open slightly and Serene and Satnak pull the covers up over themselves.

Satnak: Hey! Don’t come in!

A young girl pokes her head in. She appears to be about fifteen years of age with dazzling white hair and deep blue eyes. Behind her insanely cute exterior there’s an air of wisdom that someone her age should not possess, and just a hint of a hidden ferocity. She’s dressed in a fairly formal dark red dress and wears a dark blue gem on a chain around her neck. On her fingers rest beautiful opal rings

Serene: Sara!? What are you doing here? And you look older than you did last time I saw you…

Satnak: And why are you barging into our room? :mad:

Sara: Um… I’m Terrek's apprentice. He sent me to see how you two were coming along. He said you might be “busy.” Looks like he was right. :smirk:

Satnak and Serene: :embarrass

Sara: Anyways… You two need to hurry up. You’ve only got a few minutes till the banquet starts.

Satnak: But I thought Terrek said we had an hour?

Sara: Yeah. That was two hours ago.

Serene: Oops… :embarrass

Sara: Yeah. You guys better hurry up. You are the guests of honor after all.

Sara leaves closing the door behind her.

Satnak: Jeeze… How’d she grow up so fast?

Serene: Probably daddy messing with time again as usual. Oh! I found your clothes, they’re over here.

The two girls get up to get dressed. Serene puts her undergarments on and walks over to her dress to inspect it. Satnak, however is still looking around the floor and the bed. After a moment, she gives up and turns to Serene.

Satnak: Hey have you seen my under… you’re still wearing them aren’t you?

Serene: Yep :D

Satnak: *sigh* Fine… I’ll just wear yours then. :smirk:

The two get dressed in their respective dresses and turn to inspect each other.

OOC: Will have more up later today, but I wanted to get something posted before rampant had a conniption.

EDIT: Rampant, I am working on what happens directly after this so don't go posting anything yet. It will be up today so don't start freaking. :P
.
luna18moon

10-02-06, 03:47 PM		Slaypaw is taking a break from her kittens, who are playing behind her. She has climbed out from the main ship as far as she dares. There are slight disturbances in the air in front of her and streaming from her back.
Slaypaw: I know that's you, Wildclaw.
The air in front of her solidifies. The image of a almost translucent cat appears.
Wildclaw: What gave me away, dear sister?
Slaypaw looks at her paws.
Slaypaw: You're the only one who disguises yourself.
Wildclaw: You've seen them?
Slaypaw: They're everywhere... Greatheart is up by the mast, and Peek and Robin are trying to play with my kittens.:(
Wildclaw: You haven't told Fluffy about us, have you? Have you fed him the same story you tell everyone else?:mad:
Slaypaw says nothing.
Wildclaw: He thinks you killed an elder? Your crime was so much worse... you caused our whole tribe's death.
Slaypaw: They said they wouldn't touch you if I joined them...
Wildclaw: You knew to never trust lupins. Those were a band of hired killers. And you killed most of our number yourself!:ahem:
Slaypaw: :weep: The sorcerer forced me to!
Wildclaw: Your wings show your guilt. You killed even Peek and Robin, who were only a week old.
Slaypaw: *sobbing* Why do you have to do this? You visited enough pain on me when I tried to live with another tribe. Why won't you leave me alone?
Wildclaw: We will be leaving soon.
For a moment, Slaypaw's face fills with hope.
Wildclaw: And you will be coming with us, to face your punishment.
Slaypaw breaks down.
Wildclaw: You have until midnight to make sure your kittens get taken care of. *vanishes*
Slaypaw, with an effort, stops crying. She picks up her kittens and takes them to Fluffy.
Fluffy: What's this?
Slaypaw: I'm leaving at midnight to go on a long trip.
Fluffy: How long?
Slaypaw: :( Take care of Rip, Tear, Shred, and Mittens.
She leaves before Fluffy can say anything.
Rip: Dad, where's Momma going?
Fluffy: :( I don't know, Rip, I don't know.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-02-06, 04:43 PM		Silver: *grumble, grumble*

Bunny: An entire tribe? That's potential right there.

Silver: DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO GET A HYBRID COUPLE LIKE THAT?! WHERE ELSE AM I SUPPOSED TO EXPERIMENT ON BESTIALITY ON THIS SHIP?!

Bunny: Marish and Cuddles.

Silver: Oh, right.

13: Sucks to be Slaypaw.

OOcat: Marish is, what, 3-4 months along now?

Silver: I haven't been keeping track. Still THAT WAS A FREAKIN' GOOD COMBINATION!

OOcat: Can I get someone to tone her down?

Silver: Hey, Bunny, you have any jurisdiction over this?

Bunny: I just kill 'em. Avoids paperwork.
rampant

10-02-06, 04:46 PM		Fluffy - meowing (but if there is one thing I do know, we are her family and don't have to take this lying down)

Mittens - mewing (what do we do?)

Fluffy - Meow (bring me a squirrel, alive)
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-02-06, 04:49 PM		Silver: Daring romantic rescue! :D

Bunny: Translation: more kittens. :bored:
urial angel of death

10-02-06, 05:20 PM		Elina is chasing Sarah through the ship when she trips on the sleeping form of Kerrith.

Elina: Oh sorry.

Kerrith: *Waking up* That's okay I- :love:

Elina: *wake hand infront of him* Hello, are you asleep again?

Kerrith: :drool:

Sarah: What's wrong with him?

Elina: I don't know.

The girls run off.
rampant

10-02-06, 05:37 PM		Tirmek - *picks up kerrith and tosses him in an out of the way side room* OH by the way they're both too young you creep.
luna18moon

10-02-06, 05:48 PM		OOC: Thanks y'all. Just to clarify: I get to do THE MOMENT when her family arrives, 'cause that's when her punishment is revealed, and y'all don't know what it is. It had been pretty late when this was revealed, so without further ado...
IC:
Midnight arrives, and the ghost-thingies (they're kinda like the mist-spirits Elina spoke to) gather at the front of the ship. Slaypaw walks up, being generally sad, depressed, resigned, etc.. Her wings appear, seeming dark and somehow negative-emotionish.
Wildclaw: Time to return home, *sarcastic*dear sister.
Most of them rise into the air. Slaypaw beats her wings, and rises. The rest of the ghosts follow her.
Slaypaw closes her eyes and thinks about her childhood.
FLASHBACK!
A younger Slaypaw is helping fight a band of wolfish creatures.
After some of the creatures are killed, four run off. One, with arcane energy still crackling around its fists, looks back at the band of tibbits, looking for the young Slaypaw.
The tibbits were congratulated by the elders. The young Slaypaw leaves, heading for home. A hand grabs her, pulling her off to the side. A frightened Slaypaw looks up, and her eyes widen. The wolflike creatures that she fought are standing over her.
Creature 1: Recognize us?:devil:
Slaypaw: The lupins we drove off!
Lupin 2: YOU drove off. We decided it would be better to confront you this way.:schemes:
Lupin 3: Listen up. :incog: You're a talented warrior, and we would be glad to count you as one of our own.
Slaypaw: Ally with a lupin? :ahem: Yeah right.
Lupin 4: BE a lupin.
Slaypaw: I'd want that even less.
Lupin 3: Well then, :devil: do you want the blood of your tribemates on our paws?
Slaypaw: :eek: You wouldn't.
Lupin 2: Yep. Every one of them.:devil:
Lupin 1: We'll pick you up at sunset.:evillaugh
Lupin 3: Be ready.
The lupins run off.
Later...
The sun begins to set. Slaypaw has packed up all her possessions. She meets the lupins at the front gate.
The last words she remembers are "Excellent.:devil: "
Then vague pictures: slaughtering the tribe, becoming a lupin, training as an evil cleric, and charging in to meet a beholder, :fight!: style.
That's where her memory returns. She was changed back into a tibbit by the beholder's gaze, and ran.
Trying to join a new tribe, but the ghosts of her tribemates devestate the tribe, and Slaypaw is exiled.
Finally making it onboard the Forgotten Freedom. Thinking she would be safe. But then the ghosts started appearing again.
END FLASHBACK!
urial angel of death

10-02-06, 05:50 PM		Kerrith: Well isn't that the pot calling the ketle black.

Tirmek: What do you mean by that?

Kerrith: You have it out for Sarah. It's not like I'm that old. I'm only in my late fifties.

Tirmek: That's really old!

Kerrith: Ugh how often do I have to explain it to you beastmen? Drow age much slowwer than you lesser races.

OOC: Rampant take it where you will. Kerrith is honestly mistaking Tirmek for one of the not to bright servent races from his world. FYI Kerrith is about twelve by human standards.
cypher_zero

10-02-06, 06:11 PM		The two get dressed in their respective dresses and turn to inspect each other. Serene stands in a flowing dress of dark blue that fades in to crimson at the bottom with an open back. Around the low-cut hem of her dress rest 4 gems, two on each side of the V, one each for the colors to the two houses she now belongs to; Red and blue for her father’s and brown and silver for Satnak’s.

Satnak: Wow… you look amazing.

Serene: Thanks, you too.

Satnak stands in a predominantly red dress hugging her torso tight then slitting at the waist to give her legs room to move.

Satnak: … I’m not so sure I like it. The open sides are a bit to revealing for my taste.

Serene: Here, you forgot this. It goes on underneath.

Serene hands Satnak a long flowing black skirt and she puts it on.

Satnak: Ok, that’s better but this still seems like an odd dress.

Serene: It kind of is. It’s actually traditionally warrior formal wear for occasions like this.

Satnak: It is?

Serene: Yeah. This is actually a martial society with a strong tradition of being powerful warriors. It all stems back to the war daddy won to get rulership of the realm. Since then, it’s been an important part of everyone’s lives to be combat ready. The dress identifies your preferred style of combat as close range. That’s why the skirt is slit at the sides, to allow for better maneuverability. Oh, and you forgot the bracers.

Satnak: Bracers?

Serene hands Satnak a pair of beautifully crafted mithral bracers. They are formed not from one, but from hundreds of small strands of mithral interwoven together and inlaid with gems. Satnak stares at them for a moment, taking in the perfection with which they have been crafted then slips them on.

Satnak: Wow… theses are beautiful. These must’ve been what he was talking about. What'd he give you?

Serene: It’s a flute… but I’ve never seen anything quite like it before.

Satnak: You’ll have to play it for me later

*knock* *knock*

Satnak: Oh geeze… We’d better get going.

]Serene: Here, put on your cloak.

Serene hands Satnak a dark red cloak that matches her dress. She puts it on and sees that it hangs down to her feet and trails slightly above the floor.

Satnak: Well this kind of obscures the dress doesn’t it? What was the point then?

Serene: Silly girl, you’re not supposed to wear it the whole time, just until we sit down. Daddy likes them because they do cover up whatever you’re wearing underneath. He’s such a drama queen sometimes…

Satnak: How is the cloak dramatic?

Serene: Well, see, when daddy takes off his cloak, which he hides his wings under most of the time, he spreads them out to their full width while dropping the cloak quickly. He thinks it makes him look intimidating.

Satnak: Haha! That sounds like Ter... er, your dad alright.

Serene: Hehe! Yeah… He expects us to do something along the same lines, but more to show off the dresses all at once to get everyone around to marvel at them and how pretty we are.

Satnak: Ha! Well, we mustn’t disappoint your father then :smirk: But if anyone makes a pass at your, I’m going to have to beat them senseless.

Serene: Maybe I should warn you about Prexoras then…

Satnak: Oh… Is he an ex or something?

Serene: No, but he’s been after me for years. Wouldn’t let up after I told him I wasn’t even interested in guys. He’s a nice guy, but he just doesn’t get the picture. Hopefully today he’ll finally get the picture.

Satnak: …

OOC: Rampant, your reply.
.
rampant

10-02-06, 06:32 PM		Satnak - (i.h.h. note smash Prexoras on general principle, harder if he gets uppity) Um,... What do I do with my tail?

Serene - Hmmmm..., oh here!:devil:

Satnak - :confused: :eek:

Serene slips her hand down and pulls Satnak's tail through to a hole in the dress back.

Serene - There's also a pair of slits for your wings. You just have to look real close to see them.

Satnak - Well then lets go, I need to eat:weep:
----------------------------------------

Tirmek - They're nine! you sicko! I'm 8! and who are you calling a lesser race, The d'Tharmis have been the premier lineage of the elite fighting families since before The War. *call dragonrazor**shing-shing-shing*

Kerrith is now standing in a pile of his own shredded robes.

Tirmek - I have to ref those two before they break something more important than you, like a chair.

-exit-
Chrys

10-02-06, 07:14 PM		5 years ago T.U.T. [Thelanis Un-standard time] or about 5 or 6 hours ago ‘normal’ Eberron time.

Eiko the Horned Nymph gave birth to another daughter, at the time this seemed normal.

A week about T.U.T or now normal Eberron time.

Eiko the Horned Nymph, Countess of the Trees of the Unseelie Court is having another fight with her youngest daughter Bloom.

Eiko: Get back her young lady I am so not done yelling at you! Don’t stick you tounge out at me, That’s it You grounded!

Bloom: Ha, that just proves my point to Hippo…

A teal Giff walks by eating a Pinapple. [ Hungry hungry hippo joke]

Bloom: …crite… that’s what I hate about this place… It so damn random.

Eiko: We are Fey random chaos is what most of us do; so act right and stop trying to corrupt you sisters!

Bloom: I’m not corrupting them I’m trying to teach…

Eiko: Your not teaching anything any more now go to your room… or you can go live with you other sisters!

Bloom: Fine I will! Where ever she lives can’t be any worse then here!

>>>><<<<

OoChrys: Meet Bloom, P/Y/Rs half sister… Wait Bloom you couldn’t think of a better name then that?

OoWriterChrys: :shifty: Names Baaaaadddd!

OoChrys: Right You need to seek help. Any who… if you want to find out what Bloom :rolleyes: can do tune in next time.
Ultimatecalibur

10-02-06, 07:17 PM		Nakajima (exploring the library) -- (to self) I need to find some books on this world, its mythology, legends and major religons. (looking at the stacks) Hm, if what those two told me is true, a Narrative Element should make something happen.

--Meanwhile in other parts of the library--

One of the redshirts working in the library slips, bumps into a bookcase, releasing a very hungry flying book that proceeds to chase the redshirt crashing around the library sending even more books flying, one of which causes Tirmek to mistep slip and fall on his back as he walks away from Kerrith.

--Back where Nakajima is--

The flying book, now abit larger, lets out a burp somehow, and continues to fly along back to its place on the shelves.

Nakajima (catching the flying book in one hand) -- Ah, perfect, just what I was looking for A History of Eberron's Religons.

OOUltimate -- Just for the record, I am trying to make Tirmek's life hell. If rampant had not posted while I was making this Tirmek and Kerrith would now be kissing. Its good comedy.
luna18moon

10-02-06, 07:33 PM		Elina: Hey, wait a second. They're gone!
Sarah: :confused: Who're gone?
Elina: I used to see cats everywhere, but they're gone.
Fluffy runs up.
Fluffy: Hey, have you two seen Slaypaw? She said she was going on a trip, and implied she wouldn't come back!
Sarah: Isn't she the kittens' mother?
Elina: I don't know where she is, but she's probably with the cats.
Fluffy: :confused: What cats?
Elina: Cat-spirits have been hanging around lately. I saw Slaypaw talking to one before they all left.
Fluffy: Thanks! *runs off*
Elina: Back to the game?
Sarah: Back to the game.:D
OOC: Thanks, Cypher. Couldn't remember which.
cypher_zero

10-02-06, 07:37 PM		OOC: Hey Luna! You mean Sarah, not Sara. We've got Sara (who is an alternate Sarah from one year in the future who is now Terrek's apprentice and apparantely age 15 due to time distortion) and Sarah - Lisa and Terra's daughter, sister to Elina. There's also Elin - Sara's sister of the same origin. Has not aged due to time distotrion. Just FYI so we can keep things straight.
.
rampant

10-02-06, 07:51 PM		OOC: For crying out loud he's 8!!! other than that go ahead. Just remember he is a precociuos lad (read: not quite as badass as Elina or Sarah, but smarter and more viscious.) That goes for anyone else, Tirmek is supposed to come of like a bit of a jerk.
cypher_zero

10-02-06, 08:08 PM		OOC: Thought I'd just mention that I've updated Serene and Sara's Wiki's. The wiki can be found here: http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Main_Page
.
luna18moon

10-02-06, 09:21 PM		OOC: Updated Slaypaw's Wiki!
IC:
The ghosts and Slaypaw settle down in a clearing. The trees around it are blackened. There are remnants of burnt buildings everywhere. Slaypaw knelt down and picked up a necklace. It was simple, a heart-shaped pendant. Slaypaw's eyes filled with tears. It had been one of her birthday presents that she had had to leave behind.
Wildclaw: Do you remember how the village was destroyed? You have three days before your punishment is dealt out.
Slaypaw dug through the rubble, searching for more artifacts of her old life.

Elsewhere:
Mittens: Do you know where she used to live?
Fluffy: No. Why?
Mittens: 'Cause I heard her talking to her sister.
Fluffy: Was this sister... see-through?
Mittens: Yeah.
Fluffy: :blink: You can see ghosts?
Mittens: Yep. They don't notice me like they notice Elina, though.
Fluffy: Why didn't you tell me?
Mittens: You never asked. Her sister said that they were going home to punish Mom. She said Mom destroyed their village, but Mom said lupins did. What's a lupin?
Fluffy: I'll tell you later. Rip! Tear!
Rip and Tear walk up.
Fluffy: You've been studying in the library, right?
Rip and Tear look :shifty:.
Fluffy: Yes, I know you were. Did you read anything about destroyed tibbit tribes?
Rip: Yeah, there was one
Tear: on an island
Rip: off the coast of
Tear: the Mournlands.
Rip: Why?
Fluffy: :twitch: That is so creepy when you do that. We're off to that island!
Shred: We shouldn't.
Everyone stares at him.
Shred: Something really bad will happen when we get there.
Fluffy: Something really bad will happen anyway. Let's go!
The kittens climb on, including (reluctantly) Shred. Fluffy opens his wings and flys towards the island.
urial angel of death

10-02-06, 09:41 PM		OOC: Rampant it wouldn't have worked for Kerrith either but hey if it was good comedy let it be so. After all if Kerrith kissed someone of a race he thought Tirmek was a part of it would be borderline bestiality.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-02-06, 10:47 PM		OOUltimate -- He was not talking about you, Kazier, but the 2 girls.
Clarification-OOKaizer: I know. I was saying that, technically, all the characters here are aspects of their respective Entities. That's what the Entity =/= god comment was about.

Spoiler-OOKaizer: But...you know...:shifty:...that comment was somewhat accur-

*BEATING OF EPIC PROPORTIONS*

Keeper-of-Secrets-OOKaizer: GET *SMACK* BACK *CRUSH* IN *CRACK* THE *BREAK* @%^$ING *SMASH* ROOM!!!!!

Command-OOKaizer: How did he get out again? Where's Rascally?

*elsewhere, just outside The Room*

Rascally-OOKaizer: :devil: :plotting: :evillaugh

Sentinal-OOKaizer: Not so fast!

Rascally-OOKaizer: :eek:

Sentinal-OOKaizer: *cuffs him* You've caused enough trouble for now. I'm taking you to...THE BOX!

Rascally-OOKaizer: :eek: :weep: :eek: :weep:

Before opening a small box, Sentinal stuffs several cottonballs into his ears and places a pair of earmuffs and a thick headband over them. Sentinal then stuffs Rascally into it. When it is opened, music from Elmo's World can be heard.

*back in the command center*

Commentary-OOKaizer: Rascally's been neutralized, sir.

Command-OOKaizer: Good. Now maybe things will get back to normal around here.

The different personalities are busy taking shots at Rules-Nazi-OOKaizer.

Rules-Nazi-OOKaizer: :mad: This is so not in the rules. *BANG* :eek:

Commentary-OOKaizer: It's better than what we did to Reason, isn't it?

In the corner, Reason-OOKaizer can be seen rocking back and forth nervously.

Reason-OOKaizer: :twitch: Can't sleep...clowns will eat me... :twitch: Can't sleep...clowns will eat me... :twitch: Can't sleep...clowns will eat me... :twitch: Can't sleep...clowns will eat me...
Crystalforged

10-03-06, 12:04 AM		In the corner, Reason-OOKaizer can be seen rocking back and forth nervously.

Reason-OOKaizer: :twitch: Can't sleep...clowns will eat me... :twitch: Can't sleep...clowns will eat me... :twitch: Can't sleep...clowns will eat me... :twitch: Can't sleep...clowns will eat me...
Kanatash: (appearing from nowhere) Here, have a tangello. (hands Reason-OOKaizer an orange)

Command-OOKaizer: Wait, how did you get in here? You're supposed to be in Crystalforge's head, not mine!

Kanatash: Well, you see that's the thing. Right now my entity is typing this so technically your mind, or at least the concept of it, exists WITHIN his mind where I dwell as well. Paradoxical, no? It's like pointing a video camera at a television projecting what the camera records and it can get even deeper.

Command-OOKaizer: :confused: :twitch: :doh: Thinking about that makes my head hurt.

Kanatash: See? We've just entered another level of paradox here.

Complaint-OOCommand-OOKaizer: (appearing on Command-OOKaizer's shoulder) Why do you always have to do things like this?

Skeptical-OOComplaint-OOCommand-OOKaizer: (appearing on Complaint-OOCommand-OOKaizer's shoulder) Wait, you said we were entering a paradox before Complaint-OOCommand-OOKaizer appeared. Either you're predicting things before they happen, which I'm not ruling out, or you're causing them to happen.

Practical-OOSkeptical-OOComplaint-OOCommand-OOKaizer: (appearing on Skeptical-OOComplaint-OOCommand-OOKaizer's shoulder) :bored: Alright, enough of this, can you PLEASE tell Crystalforged to end this post before the names get any longer?

Kanatash: As you comma-
luna18moon

10-03-06, 12:07 AM		Three days later...
Slaypaw: i.h.h. Am I going insane?
She has found most of the things she had to leave behind all those years ago. However, for the last three days, gaps had been appearing in her memory. Three gaps in all. Wildclaw floated up.
Wildclaw: It is time, Bloodwinged Slaypaw.
Wildclaw leads Slaypaw to a large hollowed-out tree.
Greatheart: Slaypaw, you dstroyed our village and killed our tribe. As punishment...
Fluffy and the kittens land outside, bursting in in time for Mittens to hear...
Greatheart: you will kill and deny afterlife to all those you love, and when death takes you, be denied an afterlife as well.
Fluffy: Slaypaw!
Slaypaw: No! Run!
Greatheart: What luck! Your first victims have come to us. *to other ghosts* Bind the three kittens and the father!
The same thought ran through Fluffy and Slaypaw's minds.
Both: Three?
Mittens: I told you they don't notice me.
Greatheart: Present the killer with the spear!
A spear of pure blackness is brought to Slaypaw. As soon as she touches it, her mind is assaulted by an unseen force. The last thing she hears is "Thanifex!" Then blackness.
Fluffy sees his love touch the spear, and her eyes go blank. Then, Slaypaw turns and advances on them, spear in hand.
Rip: We can sense
Tear: her malice. She
Rip: was taken over
Tear: by the spear.
Shred: *sigh* I told you something bad would happen.
Shred shifts to tibbit form and draws a dagger, cutting at nothing in particular. He runs at Slaypaw.
Shred: It's about time your legacy was over
Fluffy gasps.
Shred: Thanifex!
He leaps at the spear. He tosses the dagger up in the air, catches it in his toes, and kicks at the spear. Thanifex shatters, and Slaypaw slumps over, unconsious.
Shred: Listen up, you dead freaks. I can't see you, but Rip and Tear say Mittens can. You leave my mother alone! Rip says he can sense Mom's thoughts, and she didn't have a choice. She couldn't take on four lupins by herself, and she didn't want anyone else involved. Stop ****ing with Mom's life and go to hell, where you belong!
The ghosts flee.
Fluffy: Come on, let's go back to the ship.
They head back to the Forgotten Freedom.
Wildclaw: *watching them* He was right. Our blind thirst for vengeance caused this existance, not Slaypaw. If we hadn't started our war with the lupins, all our lives would have been saved, including Slaypaw's. She was forced to destroy her life, and we ruined her attempts to start anew. In that way, we're even worse than the lupins.
She fades away. The only two shapes that don't are Peek and Robin, the kittens. In fact, they solidify and begin breathing again.
Peek: Let's go live with Aunt Slaypaw!
Robin: Yeah!
A letter floats down. Peek grabs it, and then both unfurl wings. They fly away, bringing new hope and peace to the sole survivor of the Panther's Grace tribe.
rampant

10-03-06, 12:24 AM		Fluffy - Meoooow ( most un-catlike behavior ):P

Slaypaw - Meow (stop teasing the dead people)
Ultimatecalibur

10-03-06, 12:34 AM		OOC: For crying out loud he's 8!!! other than that go ahead. Just remember he is a precociuos lad (read: not quite as badass as Elina or Sarah, but smarter and more viscious.) That goes for anyone else, Tirmek is supposed to come of like a bit of a jerk.

OOC: Rampant it wouldn't have worked for Kerrith either but hey if it was good comedy let it be so. After all if Kerrith kissed someone of a race he thought Tirmek was a part of it would be borderline bestiality.

OOUltimate -- That was sort of the point to the kiss, two boys around the age of 10 accidentaly kiss, and start throwing up shortly after. (For those famaliar with Naruto should get the reference). :thinks: I wonder what the FF crew will be like ten years into their future.
rampant

10-03-06, 12:43 AM		Stringer - (singing loudly) RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISSSE UP AND TAKE YOUR PLACE / NO ONE CAN MATCH OUR PACE!

Teiza - You can't hide from me.

Korre - not in this armor I can't:rolleyes:

Chalky - (starting to grey a little) Get back here you!

Squishy - (bristles getting a tad dull) 14 years you paintsniffer, after all this time you still think you can catch me?!

Elina - Hey midgets quite down I'm trying to get this spell kata right!!

Sarah - Anyone Seen Tirmek?

Lady - I chased him up the mast:D

Rose - Now now no need toget violent, all i did was welch on a bet steal your gold and post embarrising shots of you on the board.

Doog - You hold him, I'll hurt him.

Ishmeal jr. - Right love.

Marish - I'm missing one!!

Tirmek - He's up here with me. We're not coming down until lady stops being a seige crab!
---------------------------

OOCRampant - What have we learned class?

OOUltimateCaliber - Don't ask, someone might answer.
cypher_zero

10-03-06, 01:13 AM		OOC: Awesome rampant! Unfortunately, I think only you and I grasp all of the hilarity involved here though.
.
rampant

10-03-06, 01:31 AM		OOC: You forgot to orange your (.)
Also I like conniption thats a cool word.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-03-06, 02:51 AM		OOC: I think I get the general idea of what's going on. I'm not saying incase others can't figure it out. ;)

On a related note: Must...contribute...to...future...FF...

IC:

Terra: Have you girls seen your sisters? (OOC: You didn't think they'd stop with just two, did you? :D )

Elina: They're keeping an eye on our cousins.

Sarah: Uncle Volrath was really busy with ruling Sarlona, and Aunt P/Y/R is helping him put the Kalashtar through rehab.

*somewhere in the ship*

Nalfein: :mad: No, no, NO, you idiot! It's fhtagn, fhtagn!

Kerrith: :( I'm sorry, Master...

Nalfein: Now it's ruined. And you know what that means...

Kerrith: *sigh* Yes sir. *FIREBALL*

Kerrith blows himself through several walls and into Pholly's lab. Strangely enough, it doesn't explode.

Kerrith: (i.h.h.) Oh, crap on a crap cracker! I better get out of here before-

Nalfein: :devil: FIREBALL!!!

*KRACKASCUGGAFRABOOOMMM*

*back on deck*

Sarah: C'mon, Lady, let him down. Were gonna be late!

Lady: :bigeyes: Can I go?

Sarah: No.

Lady: Why not? :weep:

Sarah: It's our first date, that's why. You'll figure it out when you're older.

Lady: *pouts* Then I'm not letting him down.

Elina: Would you like to go to a movie with me?

Lady: :D Really?! :D

Elina: Go ask your mom, first.

Lady dashes off, shifting form several times in her excitement.

Tirmek: *climbing down* Thanks. I thought we'd never get down from there.

Wolf/cat/humaniod boy: Daddy!

Cuddles: :) Welcome back to the deck. But, seriously. That child is scary. And I still have yet to figure out why we have a mast in the first place.

Marish: :smirk: It is what helped us get together.

Cuddles: :D *nuzzle*

Boy: *shudder* Old people love...

OOC: :cookie: for whoever places that last comment.
urial angel of death

10-03-06, 07:23 AM		future FF

at the movies

Kerrith: *invisible and whisperong in Tirmek's ear* I know you can sense me, but remember if you fight me it will absolutely ruin the mood for your girlfriend.

Tirmek: *whispering back* I am going to kill you.

Kerrith: Jeez I'm just stealing your popcorn beastman. Besides you should turn around. I think Sarah's getting scared.

Tirmek: *dutifly puts his arm around Sarah*

Kerrith: *thinking to himself* I love this movie.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-03-06, 09:08 AM		OOcat: Here is a commentary on

THE FUTURE!

Bunny: :bored: It's not like the future makes any difference to us.

13: We're gods of important universal functions. We exist infinitely!

Bunny: Except we don't exist.

13: Exactly.

Silver: Well I know I've been busy. :devil:

Bunny: :bored: That's a given.

Silver: Let's go visit Caralot and Kanatash:

<unable to process request>

Silver: :confused: What?

<file sealed due to future past storyline spoilers>

Silver: But OOcat doesn't do planning! How can their be spoilers that haven't happened yet?!

<Error--Redo from Start>

Silver: Okay, let's check in on the employees of Erk's Place.

Saberiel:

<unable to process request>

Silver: OH COME ON!

<you have specified "Current Romance" == unable to decide what Saberiel's taste is after Aerith>

Bunny: She's still dead, so I'm guessing it would have to be someone else.

Silver: Well where else am I going to find someone that "goody-two-shoes"? Well, moving on, let's go to Weylin:

<unable to process request>

Silver: AAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!! 13!

13: I makes the sitch' that makes the blood vessels go boom. :D

<file locked due to upcoming scene>

Silver: What scene?

<scene where Sakura Jaela realizes that Weylin may have a thing for Jaela d'Vidalis [i.e. Caralot's Jaela]>

Silver: That'd send her into a real downer. Something like that shouldn't happen to someone that happy-go-lucky………:blink:………:devil:

A dark and frightening shape sneaks up on Sakura Jaela. Clawed hands slowly reach around until they suddenly clamp down on her mouth and pin her hands to her sides. She is drawn into an embrace of batlike wings. The creatures begins to lick and nibble at her neck. "Mmmm, my pretty tastes so good."

Suddenly the door to the closet opens.

Mendova: When I said "Get a room, I meant somewhere outside the bar."

Sakura and Saberiel grin sheepishly.

Silver: :D Well, let's see how the other employees are doing:

<unable to process request>

Silver: WHY?!

<entity enjoys running gag:D>
Kaizer_Ryu

10-03-06, 09:51 AM		OOC: I managed to avoid at least one really big spoiler and several smaller ones with my contribution. I just love the fhtagn joke :D . And the rehab thing from the old thread cracked me up, so I had to bring it back.

And now...back to the future!

Inevitable of bad puns: :headexplo Why must you people mock me so?!?!

IC:

Elina is busy trying her hardest not to comment on Lady's choice of movie. It is a typical "geared towards prepubecent girls" comedy/romance that involves lots of cliched lines, shoddy plot devices, and questionable acting (if it can even be called that). Lady is beside herself with adoration of the male lead (read: dopey friend that will inevitably get the girl after she realizes that he's been looking out for her this whole time, especially after she finds out that the charismatic guy she's chasing after is a total jerk).

Elina: (i.h.h.) :weep: Why did I agree to this? This hurts to watch. I can't really make fun of it without upsetting Lady. Sarah owes me big for this...

*meanwhile, in a completely different movie*

As Kerrith reaches for more popcorn, he finds that Sarah has taken the bag. Moving over to her silently, he can feel Tirmek's gaze on the back of his neck. As he goes for more, he stops.

Kerrith: (i.h.h.) She is rather cute...and I'm invisible...:thinks:...:blink: :devil:

He shortly finds himself bound by several tentacles and thrown towards the back of the theater with a thud.

Sarah: *angry pom* Creep. As if I didn't notice him...

Tirmek: *anime sweatdrop* (i.h.h.) Ten years and she still scares me a bit...

OOC: I haven't decided what will happen when the final seal releases, so this is only one of many possibilities (as is the rest of this, obviously).
rampant

10-03-06, 10:12 AM		OOC: I've created a monster...YAaaaaaY!
---------------------

Serene - Will you calm down!

Satnak - But...

Serene - Oh come on we've done this four times already.

Sanak - Technically the twins make it only 3.

Serene - :bored: could you please get me something to eat.

Satnak - Right away love. Come little one.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-03-06, 10:20 AM		OOcat: I seriously hope we don't get stuck in the future. I still don't know if Caralot and Kanatash get married.

Anyway, I've decided to name those really far down decks that are supposed to be horribly dangerous but in reality are the perfect place of un- or lesser-used crew to find their space, not to mention containing the half-toaster civilization and the barbarian hoardes of half-biscuits. I give you:

The Dungeon Decks!

13: And now you are probably never going to use them.

Silver: I think we'd better decide on a due-date for Marish.

13: Maybe we should decided on how many kittens?

OOcat: Four.

Silver: How do you know? :confused:

OOcat: Because we need one for Cuddles, one for Ash, one for Jarlot, and one for…………………
rampant

10-03-06, 10:28 AM		In the dungeon decks

Squirrel supreme military commander - Squeak squeaken rup-chirrup, rup chir-squeak squeaker.

A massive horde of squirrels raise their weapons in salute and charge into the fray. The half-toasters are not faring well against the Squirrel engineers, and the half-biscuits have no hope against the ravager packs.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-03-06, 10:37 AM		Elina is busy trying her hardest not to comment on Lady's choice of movie. It is a typical "geared towards prepubecent girls" comedy/romance that involves lots of cliched lines, shoddy plot devices, and questionable acting (if it can even be called that). Lady is beside herself with adoration of the male lead (read: dopey friend that will inevitably get the girl after she realizes that he's been looking out for her this whole time, especially after she finds out that the charismatic guy she's chasing after is a total jerk).

Elina: (i.h.h.) :weep: Why did I agree to this? This hurts to watch. I can't really make fun of it without upsetting Lady. Sarah owes me big for this...
Then the movie takes an unexpected plot twist as the jerk's skin rips away to reveal that he is a bug-like monster. Then the dopey friend's skin also rips away to reveal that he is a similar kind of bug monster. They square off and start verbally bantering about their past rivalry as alien warriors.

Elina: :confused:

Lady: All right! Finally, a hot guy battle!

Elina: You think……that bug-monsters are hot?

Lady: I'm an omni-entomanthrope. What did you think I like?

Elina: So you like this movie…?

Lady: Because it's so cheesy. :D It's designed to be stupid. :rolleyes:

Tom Servo: I'm the manliest bug monster.

Crow T. Robot: No! I am the manliest bug monster!
rwarner3701

10-03-06, 10:44 AM		In the future

Earl: Reman helped me negotiate with Jarlot for a new contract.

Cuddles: What did you have to give up to get a mast?

Earl: I promised to never use the health insurance.

Cuddles: But your an elemental.

Earl: But it worked.

----
In the present

Elin wanders into the smaller students library and sees Gregory standing along one of the sides.

Elin: What are you doing?

Gregory: ...

Elin: Hey can you hear me?

Gregory: ...

Elin: Please answer me :bigeyes:

Gregory: I was trying to study but now I have to start all over.

He moves to the closest table and looks through a book that is sitting on it.

Gregory: (reading to himself) Don't ignore the world, just don't react to it.

He moves back against the wall and stands back at attention.

Elin grabs a book and starts to read it when Kerrith walks in.

Kerrith: Well hello there :love:

Elin: Hi :blush:

Gregory: ...

Kerrith: What is wrong with him?

Elin: He is studying to look important or something.

Kerrith: Thats... interesting. What about you?

Elin: Oh I'm working on a leisure studies degree.

Kerrith: Do you have a mentor?

Elin: No but everyone else seems to have one I just don't know anyone that fits my area.

Nemisis walks into the library nods at the others and walks over to the large text spread out on a pedastal and begins to flip through the pages.

Kerrith: What is that?

Elin: Its the catalog, lists all the topics and where they can be found on the shelves.

Kerrith: Like the Dewey Decimal systems?

Elin: No, Volrath had a problem with Dewey d'Sivis and just put everything in alphabetical order in the catalog.

Nemisis: (mumbling) table, tennis, time, torch, total... no torture? Wait a second, I think I'm in the wrong library.

Gregory: Torture is bad!

Nemisis: Oh the poor paladin is gonna have to start all over again. :w00t:

Gergory: You did that on purpose?

Nemisis: Of course, I know where the real library is.

Nemisis leaves laughing as Gregory goes back to his book to study more.

Elin: Why do you want to be a paladin anyway?

Gregory: I want to help people and stop evil but I don't have enough disciple for anyone to teach me.

Elin: Maybe you could do something else.

Gregory: Like what?

Elin: How about clerics they get to help people and fight evil but don't have to train for hours they just pray.

Gregory: That might work but what about Lisa?

Elin: Has she taught you anything yet?

Gregory: Well not really but I want to live up to her example of good.

Elin: So act like her but in a differant way.

Gregory: Who can teach me to be a cleric?

Elin: Well You wouldn't like Andrea and Darian is a little strange.

Kerrith: I think Piffany is studying with Mickey, maybe he will take another student.

Gregory: Great I'll go talk to him.

Gergory gathers up his books and heads out the door then Kerrith turns back to Elin.

Kerrith: So... now that we are alone...

OOC: If Kerrith is similar to a 12 year old than Elin may be a better choice she is 13 I believe after some extra aging with Rose. Still they are kind of young but at least they are closer in age.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-03-06, 10:56 AM		:( Awwwww... The only purpose of that was to cause Elina psychological harm from watching a horrible movie. Now it's funny in a different way...

Elina: :mad: Jerk.

Hey. At least I'm saying you're the one who finally clears out the Mournlands.

Elina: I'm also fundamentally un-datable because of it. All the guys are too freaked out.

You could always ask Silver for help...

Elina: And give her a challenge? No thanks. I've seen what happens in those situations, thank you.

But what about-?

Elina: Girls? I have no idea. Am I interested in them?

Ummmmm...........yes?

Elina: Guess I'd better start looking, then.

OOC: For the rest of you, again, I have no idea how things will pan out in this area, so don't take it as canon. I'm not saying I won't do it, just that I haven't decided I will do it. ;)
Ultimatecalibur

10-03-06, 12:05 PM		--back to the past--

Nakajima (looking at the publication date in his book) -- This publishing date is weird. Though if this book was from the future, that would explain why the God of Womanizing, Bards and Unexpected Turn Arounds was named Rose.

OOUltimate -- rampant you idiot. I asked because I expected something like that to happen.
rampant

10-03-06, 12:16 PM		OORampant - My little friend doesn't like your tone. *ca-klick*

OOUltiimate - *anime sweatdrop* no need to resort to 30 megawatt plasma cannons.

OORampant - BLASPHEMER!
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-03-06, 12:21 PM		:( Awwwww... The only purpose of that was to cause Elina psychological harm from watching a horrible movie. Now it's funny in a different way...
OOcat: Yeah, but I can't have Lady being a boring old prepubescent. She's a half-celestial succubus omni-entomanthrope who's mother is in to women and has been/is being trained by Mrs. Fuzzy Logic in the Way of the Funny Hat.
Elina: Girls? I have no idea. Am I interested in them?

Ummmmm...........yes?

Elina: Guess I'd better start looking, then.
Silver: Am I the only one here who realizes there is such a thing as bisexual?

Bunny: I could kill all their male sides. Maybe they'd wise up.

Silver: Hasn't helped us any.
Chrys

10-03-06, 12:22 PM		A Large thorn slam in to Johnny the Awakened Dire keel’s head [?]; and then what look to be a 12 year old girl steps out of the thorn and on to the deck.

Johnny: Ow.

Bloom: Sorry, if you would have been on the ground I would have just walked aboard.

Johnny: its ok, a giant thorn in my side is a whole lot better then all the explosions.

Bloom: Would this happen to be the Forgotten Freedom?

Johnny: Yep, I’m Johnny the Awakened Dire keel… and you are?

Bloom: I’m Bloom… I’m sort of a War-forged Dryad Druid thingy.

Johnny: Oh how nice, are you a friends of Terra’s?

Bloom: What’s a terra? Any way I’m looking for my sisters, our mother kicked me out and told me to go live with them so do you know where they are at?

Johnny: No sorry you might want to as the captain… oh and Terra is the only other Druid on the ship… on second thought you might want to talk either her or Lisa about finding you sister, they are a bit more… um… better.

Ketler: Hey Johnny, I got captain Rose to app… Rrrrrroooobbbb…

Bloom: Um… is that guy ok?

Johnny: Er… he has a thing for younger girls…

Ketler: ...oootttt ggggiiirrrlll !!!!

Bloom: Should a Human nose bleed that much?

Johnny: Bloom would you mind getting away from him before he explodes.

Bloom: Ok I’m going to look for my sister… bye-bye mister crazy man.
Ultimatecalibur

10-03-06, 12:29 PM		OOUltimate (point) -- Meet my little friend, JHN, a Mark XXXI bolo, armed with a 200 cm Hellbore cannon capable of releasing 5 megatons of plasma per second. Now shut up and quit trying to intimidate me, you have far to few ranks, rampant.
Gladius_Lucix

10-03-06, 12:35 PM		In the Future...

Liam surfaces from the pool of gold from the liscensing of Weirsan Energy. A roll from the Duct Tape Swarm rolls up next to him.

The Swarm: Boss? You may want to take a look at the Cascade Engine.

Liam: What's wrong with it?

The Swarm: Let's just say that your calculations were a bit off. The rifts are about to go critical.

Liam: What? How did it happen so quickly?

The Swarm: It might be something to do with the Probability Drive. Remember some of those Similar Probability Errors in the early days?

Liam: :banghead: Don't tell me. One of them backlashed into the Cascade Engine?

The Swarm: That's the current theory.

Liam: Why can't we just reverse power to the rift generator?

The Swarm: I'll try, but the rifts are growing rather fast. If it misses one, everything will come crashing down.

Liam: Well, crap. :lightbulb Wait!

Liam starts typing on an armband.

Liam: Calculate probability of rift creation to self repair and reverse to manageable levels.

Armband: Probability is one in seven quadrillion, two hundred eighty one trillion, six hundred billion, seventy three million, five hundred fifty nine thousand, four hundred and two.

Liam: Activate Probability Engine at that value to that purpose.

Armband: Activating. Activation complete. Probability warp in progress. Probability warp complete.

The Swarm: It worked! Rift density is at .02% Xoriat.

----
OOC: The point of this, you ask? To demonstrate a more advanced version of Liam's latest invention in present Forgotten Freedom.
Gladius_Lucix

10-03-06, 12:42 PM		OORampant - My little friend doesn't like your tone. *ca-klick*

OOUltiimate - *anime sweatdrop* no need to resort to 30 megawatt plasma cannons.

OORampant - BLASPHEMER!

OOUltimate (point) -- Meet my little friend, JHN, a Mark XXXI bolo, armed with a 200 cm Hellbore cannon capable of releasing 5 megatons of plasma per second. Now shut up and quit trying to intimidate me, you have far to few ranks, rampant.

OOGladius: Okay, break it up. If you don't drop those plasma cannons now, you'll get a taste of the Mi-Go cannon, with the full Weirsan Output of the Ship pumped through it. Do you really want to see what it can do to an entity?
Ultimatecalibur

10-03-06, 01:20 PM		OOUltimate -- Okay, I sent JHN back home to his battlefield. Now here are the rules of Nakajima's <> abilities:

<command (target's name/description, other effected targets' names or descriptions) : action to be completed> - lasts as long as the post on named individuals or the entities find it funny whichever is longer, the target performs the task specified, but the individual maybe perform the task in anyway the individual sees fit.

<summon (being to be summoned)> - target being appears, in whatever condition it currently is in.

Nakajima's abilities are based off of controling Weirsan Energy, though he does not know it yet.

Other abilities will appear as I create them.
Chrys

10-03-06, 01:29 PM		Bloom; The Metal Dryad [Robot Dryad Druid/Warlock hybred]

Bloom look like a 12 year old girl with Bronze skin and metallic copper hair, Normal she wears an over sized shirt that reads ‘Primus is my B*tch*

* Is one of P/Y/R’s younger half sisters; her mother is Eiko the Horned Nymph
*She is her own tree [she has an alternate form of a large Bronze wood tree.]
* Is Lawful Neutral and finds chaos annoying
* Has the Living Construct and Plant types
*May or may not drink blood
*She has now powers over animals and she can't wild shape
*Metalic Flowers and grass all ways bloom and then die as she walks
*She has to stop and listen to any music that is being played [and hates music becuase of it]
*may or may not be Related to :lop:
* can Grow Large wooden claws, small bronze wood trees and razor vine at will.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-03-06, 02:18 PM		[Robot Dryad Druid/Warlock hybred]
…* Has the Living Construct and Plant types
Bunny: No! Bad Silver! Bad!

Silver: I didn't do anything yet.

Bunny: I'm starting early.

Silver: Besides, what happens if Caralot gets to her?

13: She's busy telling Kanatash everything about her life.
*******
Caralot (non-stop yappy woman mode): …and then I met the Unspeakable One, though it turns out its name is Rosebud, and it was just the cutest thing:D…

Kanatash: :twitch: Maybe I should have just left all this alone.
********
Bloom: Should a Human nose bleed that much?
Bunny: Bleeding………hmmmm…………

OOC: By the way, I updated some entries of the crew on the wiki, including Caralot.
Chrys

10-03-06, 02:55 PM		OcChrys Hey don't worry, She isn't going to be hooking up with any buddy... and any way she she reproduces Aesexually... you know through seeds. Oh Bunny don't worry there will be plenty of death around her.;)
urial angel of death

10-03-06, 03:27 PM		*meanwhile, in a completely different movie*

As Kerrith reaches for more popcorn, he finds that Sarah has taken the bag. Moving over to her silently, he can feel Tirmek's gaze on the back of his neck. As he goes for more, he stops.

Kerrith: (i.h.h.) She is rather cute...and I'm invisible...:thinks:...:blink: :devil:

He shortly finds himself bound by several tentacles and thrown towards the back of the theater with a thud.

Sarah: *angry pom* Creep. As if I didn't notice him...

Tirmek: *anime sweatdrop* (i.h.h.) Ten years and she still scares me a bit...

OOC: I haven't decided what will happen when the final seal releases, so this is only one of many possibilities (as is the rest of this, obviously).

Kerrith: All I did was steal some popcorn. You didn’t have to throw me. *rubs head*

Sarah: Popcorn stealing is one of the most horrible sins to exist. It should be a felony punishable by death.

OOC: I apologize if I did not state it but Kerrith was interested in Elina or now Elin. Also he wouldn’t have done what you were insinuating because of the way he was raised. It is a lot like Forgotten Realms drow but less sacrificing, spiders, being underground, and evilness.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-03-06, 03:38 PM		OOC: …It is a lot like Forgotten Realms drow but less sacrificing, spiders, being underground, and evilness.
Bunny: In other words, drow without the fun bits.
Crystalforged

10-03-06, 04:16 PM		Bunny: In other words, drow without the fun bits.
OOCrystalforged: Silver might disagree with you there. (winkwink) :D

OOCat: Wait, wasn't I supposed to be the one to say that?

OOCrystalforged: Sorry, you had your chance.
urial angel of death

10-03-06, 04:49 PM		Bunny: In other words, drow without the fun bits.

OOC: You could say that, or they could be considered matriarcal grey elves that allow slavery. Just like Eberron drow are scorpian worshipping wild elves.

*flashback time*

Kerrith is standing in front of an older woman that looks very similar to him. She is wearing royal blue robes that are decorated with golden leaf patterns.

Woman: What did you do to the maid?

Kerrith: *head hung in shame* ...

Woman: Tell me and I my lessen your punishment.

Kerrith: ...

Woman: Come on now.

Kerrith: I grabbed her butt.

Woman: That is a horrible thing you did. Your behavior must be corrected. *pulls out parrot-headed umbrella*

Kerrith: Agh mother no! *whimpers that slowly die into gurgles*

OOC: cookie to those who get the refrence.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-03-06, 09:05 PM		OOC: I apologize if I did not state it but Kerrith was interested in Elina or now Elin. Also he wouldn’t have done what you were insinuating because of the way he was raised. It is a lot like Forgotten Realms drow but less sacrificing, spiders, being underground, and evilness.
OOC: I guess it didn't come out right, but I meant for it to imply that he was trying to get Tirmek in trouble with his little "stunt". That, and get the popcorn for himself. :D

And rawarner, I forgot to mention this before, but you're welcome to Gregory (unless urial has other ideas for him). I just couldn't really think of anything to do with him.

I don't do so well with developing characters I didn't create myself. If you all remember, most of my early stuff with Lisa was simply using her as a sounding board. She has since taken up permenant residence in my head, so I'm far better with her now.
cypher_zero

10-03-06, 09:31 PM		OOC: Yea, I had that problem too. Then I realized that all the voices in my head were really just the characters on the FF. I wish they'd leave me alone :( Rose keeps telling me to hit on every girl I see... LEAVE ME ALONE! ...
.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-03-06, 09:40 PM		OOC: Yea, I had that problem too. Then I realized that all the voices in my head were really just the characters on the FF. I wish they'd leave me alone :( Rose keeps telling me to hit on every girl I see... LEAVE ME ALONE! ...
OOC: I feel your pain. I only have ONE voice in my head, and it is constantly disagreeing with the rest of us.
Crystalforged

10-03-06, 09:42 PM		Well I just finished reading a bunch of RPG motivational posters and then came here and heard you taking about voices in your head and well...

http://s84.photobucket.com/albums/k37/crystalforged/?action=view&current=ForgottenFreedom.jpg&refPage=&imgAnch=imgAnch1
rampant

10-03-06, 09:52 PM		Earl - does this photo make me look fat?

John - At least they can see you *hmph*
------------------------------------------------

Sarah - *phew* Stick a fork me, I'm done.

Tirmek - *call trident*

Elina - (smacks Tirmek upside the head) Not...snicker...funny.

Tirmek - (rubbing head) anyway, Here are your forms.

Elina and Sarah - Huh?

Tirmek - Elina has beast tending with me we need to make out a sheet for what kind of critters do we want to work with, do we want to specialize, raise a specific companion critter, etc.. You both have to fillout the registration for Haz'rack season.

Sarah - I thought we did that with the racing paper work?

Tirmek - That was for tryouts and the off season. The real season starts after we get off vacation.

Sarah - Finally

Elina - We're gonna show them how we do things Forgotten Freedom style.

Sarah and Elina - No play too insane!!

Tirmek - Too bad your probably not going to play for the same team.

Sarah and Elina - *anime giant heads of rage* WHAT!!!

Tirmek - *Unfazed* Yes, you fill out the forms denoting your experience level, and relative strength in each position. After you turn in the sheets the teams are put together into leagues based on experience and age, then the teams within the league are put together by randomizing the names within their strongest position and raffling of each spot on a team. After the coach chooses a captain, the two together can offer a spot on the team to anyone in the same league, often used for people who start school, or get upgraded a league in the middle of a season. A team can trade with another, but both traded players must agree, and both teams have to vote on it seperately. With an average of 8-10 teams in the begginer league, you've got slim chances of making the same team.
-------------------------------------------

OOC: Kaizer you can pick this up, or not, or tell me and I'll mess with this some more.
cypher_zero

10-03-06, 09:53 PM		OOC: That's awesome crystalforged!

Oh, and as a side note, someone should add all the wanted posters to the Wiki...
.
Crystalforged

10-03-06, 10:00 PM		I would do Kanatash's but I don't know how to work the Wiki well enough to insert a picture.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-03-06, 10:12 PM		OOC: I switched Terra's old picture with my Wanted Poster, but it won't appear like before. I'm not sure what I did wrong. It works, but all it does is give a link to the poster.
cypher_zero

10-03-06, 10:13 PM		OOC: Done. All you have to do is paste a link to the pic and it will automaticially be displayed. That's it. Even a blind monkey could do it (assuming the monkey could still see even though it was blind and knew how to operate a computer. And knew what a "Wiki" was. And knew how to upload the image in the first place. Ok, so maybe a blind monkey couldn't do it, but a monkey could. Assuming... :teach: )
.
urial angel of death

10-03-06, 10:26 PM		OOC: I would like it if Gregory at least talked to Lisa every so often, because one of my future storylines hinges on them being close friend (just friend don't get any ideas you sickos :P ). Other than that everyone else has free-reign.

Another thing to those who wish to roleplay Kerrith make sure he is rude to Tirmek and only Tirmek. To other people he should be either homiciadal, fearful, or respectful toward, or any combination of the above.
cypher_zero

10-03-06, 10:37 PM		OOCypher: Hmm... If I wasn't mid-storyline, I'd have him bump into Terrek just to see what his reaction would be, but I'd better get back to work on the Banquet. (To OOrampant) Please master; no more kicking!

OOC: :cookie: for anyone who get's the reference. ;)
Kaizer_Ryu

10-03-06, 10:50 PM		OOC: Thanks for the hint, cypher. I figured out what I did wrong. When I tried before, I put in the location of the pic it gives in the "properties" menu. The last few characters in it are what was screwing me up. When I took out everything after *.jpg*, it worked fine. I also tweaked Terra's entry a little while I was there.

OOKaizer: Now, off to work on some more-

OOurial: *raises hammer* :mad: Is it character development?

OOKaizer: Uhhhh....:shifty: no...

OORei: *same as urial* :mad: You were gonna say character development, weren't you!

OOKaizer: Um...uh...*points behind them dramatically* LOOK! IT'S A GROUP OF DRIZZT IMPERSONATERS!

OOurial & OORei: :headexplo :hoppingma :hoppingma WHAT?!?! *they spin around*

OOKaizer: *Farore's Wind*

OOurial: *turning back* I don't see- dammit...

OORei: I hate it when he does that.

*elsewhere*

OOKaizer: :hides:
Kaizer_Ryu

10-03-06, 11:14 PM		OOC: I almost missed the continuation of your post, rampant. Good thing I like to go back and reread the last few posts every so often ;) . I'd say you can go ahead and mess with it. They do have a pretty healthy sibling rivalry going. They're great friends outside of a competition, but they go all out when competing against one another. And I don't mean "do stupid things to try and win" all out. More like "I know how good you are and I respect that, but prepare to eat my dust" :D .

As for the Beast training, what general kinds of critters are we talking about?
rampant

10-04-06, 12:22 AM		OOC: Low end critters mostly, as Elina advances she'll be taught to handle more and more volitiale varmits. If she signs on for a specific companion creature, it'll be a pet/cohort type critter that advances roughly in sync with her, since she'll be hand raising it. Something like a wyvern whelp or a baby badger, possibly a kuthrik cub. Basically I'm going to pick a random monster without the capacity for speech with an int of 6 or lower. Also any help for what positions they might play in Haz'rak? On the island they Play 2 runners, 2 mid-fielders, the goalie, the enforcer, the card, and 2 benchers for team reconfiguration.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-04-06, 12:36 AM		OOC: Tough choices. We'll discuss it overnight and they'll let me know. :D

And this must be said:

"Badgers? BADGERS?! We don' need no stinking badgers!!"

:cookie: if you get the reference.
Gladius_Lucix

10-04-06, 12:42 AM		Liam and the Swarm are dragging a large box toward the portal to Satnak's Eberron. Reaching the room, Liam collapses from the effort.

Liam: I didn't realize that the parts would be this heavy.

The Swarm: Why are you pulling, too?

Liam: Some misdirected need to help, and failing to realize that you wouldn't get tired out yourself.

The Swarm: I see. Well, I'll take it the rest of the way. Let's go.

Liam: Wait, we need a guide. Who's from there that isn't busy?
rampant

10-04-06, 12:51 AM		Rixle - Hey babe, how about dinner and a flick?

Lucky - I used to be a guy.

Rixle - :D

Lucky - Not the reaction I wanted:rolleyes:
--------------------------------

Kratwe - So by using gene therapy to work in some troll, you can drastically increase the survival rate for your symbionts.

Volrath - Fascinating, *scribbles in note book*

Caralot - What about the risk of rejection increasi-
------------------------------

Tirmek - I don't have time for a pet and no desire for a mount... so no thanks on the companion program.

Sarah - what about me?

Elina - Says here your skife is ready, and the race permit is enclosed.

Sarah - YAY!... Hey this says not valid off-course:confused: :mad:

Tirmek - Yeah it means your a racer, we're not old enough to be allowed to drive on regular roads.
------------------------------

Liam - OH sweet kyhber on a popsicle!

Ketty - thats right 'ficer.
urial angel of death

10-04-06, 07:14 AM		OOCypher: Hmm... If I wasn't mid-storyline, I'd have him bump into Terrek just to see what his reaction would be, but I'd better get back to work on the Banquet. (To OOrampant) Please master; no more kicking!

OOC: :cookie: for anyone who get's the reference. ;)

OOC: That would be a lot of fun. ;)
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-04-06, 07:30 AM		OOcat: WAY TOO MUCH OOC! Can't comment on it, it's not that funny!

Bunny: They did do some in-character stuff.

OOcat: Not much intersting there, either.

Silver: Sports teams.

Bunny: By now that should be enough for all your brains out there to get dirty.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-04-06, 09:07 AM		Please master; no more kicking!

OOC: :cookie: for anyone who get's the reference. ;)

Gretchen from dawn of War use that line. Now Gimme cookie!

(Just so every one knows Im not dead, just haven been posting much due to Working on: My novel, getting art ready for an Exebition, DMing my Fr game, and a deadline coming up in my Geosiences degree. Who says if you rarely leave you computer you gant have a life? *Tired* )
cypher_zero

10-04-06, 09:09 AM		OOC: Peanut butter or chocolate chip?
.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-04-06, 09:16 AM		Ooc: Peanut butter, unless its dark chocolate ;)
Gladius_Lucix

10-04-06, 11:27 AM		OOC: So you know, Rampant, not much scares Liam, mostly due to the fact that he is partly insane. He paid to be on the Forgotten Freedom, and with all the time working with Weirsan Energy, there's not much left that passes for a sanity score. It usually presents as a complete disregard for personal safety and complete lack of fear.

----
Liam: So, you're going to show me where to take this?

Ketty: No, I'll just take you to Forbes. He'll show you where to set everything up.

Liam: Alright. Let's go. Swarm?

The Swarm: I got it.

The box of parts is lifted on a platform of duct tape, and the group walks through the portal, with appropriate pyrotechnics.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-04-06, 11:30 AM		Sarah: Hmmm...I think I'll start as a Runner. Card might be interesting, though.

Elina: I'm going with Mid-Fielder. What does the Card do again?

Tirmek: How to describe it... The Card...is insane. That's really the best way to put it.

Elina: Ooooooo, second choice right there. As far as Beast training, I think I'll just stick with the general course for now.
rampant

10-04-06, 11:41 AM		Bezen - Why am I consumed with fear?

Tellowas - Oh come on we just signed up for the season it was your idea.
Chrys

10-04-06, 11:59 AM		Bloom walks around the ship looking for her sister or some to help her. Only to be ambushed by Chorus the Singing Red shirt.

Chorus the Singing Red shirt: Hello would you like me to sing you a song?

Bloom: No I don’t like music.

Chorus the Singing Red shirt: But my dear child ever one likes music if fact I know a song about teaching music…

Bloom: If the next word out of your mouth has any lyrical component it… I’m going to shove a Tree up your a…

Chorus the Singing Red shirt starts to sing and then finishes a School house rock type song.

Chorus the Singing Red shirt: See that wasn’t so bad was it now how about a smile it only takes a few seconds.

A few minutes later Bloom stands over an arm less Chorus the Singing Red shirt, watching the Razor Vines she grew finish there game of ‘quit hitting you self’ with him.

Bloom: That takes a bit longer but is much more fun, don’t you think ? Any way I’m going to look in the library.
rampant

10-04-06, 04:19 PM		Liam - Where are we?

Ketty - The tower plaza. The portal is set up here so that its easily accesed, but outside the main flow of traffic. Not much else here except the entrance to the administration and thats over there half-way across the feild.

Liam - Where to?

Ketty - We just went over this. (sets off)

Liam - oh, hey wait up!

Swarm - Don't mind me doing all the wor- *shrug*...*shrug*

Ketty - (shouting back) Hurry up I'm not waiting all freaking day!

Liam - MY PARTS!
king0thepirates

10-04-06, 07:49 PM		OOC: excuse me sirs,i was wondering if i could join in on this,i haven't had a chance to read the whole thread,like hell i'm reading all that,but anyway i'm good at this kinda thing so if no one minds i would really like to join in this.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-04-06, 08:47 PM		Rose, In his cabin, a gathering of crew ready for games night "I thought" *BOOM* we'd try GURPS for a while"

Andrea "Basicly you dont Know what you want to do, but you want to do it the moast compicated" *BOOM* "way posible?"

Norbaz "Hey just so long as" *BOOM* "He keeps the reighn of Steel books" *BOOM* "Away from the warforged. Might give them" *BOOM* "Ideas. Does any one else hear that?"

Rose "The constant floor" *Boom* "Shaking explosions? Kina normal. Come on GURPS is" *BOOM* "fun."

Liam "Charicer creation takes" *BOOM* "too long."

Rose "We'll use the random rules" *BOOM* for atribues then? come on get" *Boom* "rolling" takes up 3d6 and rolls "YES! an 18!" *BOOM* his dice flip from the blast, landing snake eyes. "Noooooo! Norbaz you were" *BOOM* "Right, we need to stop those" *BOOM* "Explosions. Back soon." svoling he heads out, soon finds a large chamber some how directly below his cabin. There Ash and his chsen Team are shking the timbers of the ship in a pyrotechnic desplay that is rocking the Timbers of the ship.

Rose "What the Khyber" *boom* is going on here?!"

Ash "Practicing for the 5 natons" *boom* "Conflagartion cup. Rome didn't burn in a day... " *BOOM* "Ofcores that was a bit before my time captain Spoony."

Rose "Its Rose, and what the hel are you" *BOOM* "doing right under my cabin?"

Ash "Only free area" *boom* where no one important was likly" *boom* to get hurt Spoony Rose."

Rose "Thats captain Spoony- dammit-" *Boom* What do you mean no one important is liable to get hurt," *Boom* "its right under my cabin."

Ash "Yes, I acounted for that. Was there anything else?"

Rose "Why are you even entering this" *BOOM* "contst any way?"

Ash "This is my" *Boom* "Shtic." grins. hefting a ruby crystal djorie.

Rose "Hey, rule 240: He may not brandish any staff, rod, wand or djorie and declaim 'This is my boomstick!'... Youve been wating for that-"

Ash "Since day one? well yes." :D

(OOC: King0thepirates no need to even ask, though I do advise reading up on it so you know whose toes not to tread on, and if nothing else its a great read. So come up with a charicter and join the madness. rember lusing your mind means youve one more thing to gain.)
Gladius_Lucix

10-04-06, 08:54 PM		Rose "Why are you even entering this" *BOOM* "contst any way?"

Ash "This is my" *Boom* "Shtic." grins. hefting a ruby crystal djorie.

Rose "Hey, rule 240: He may not brandish any staff, rod, wand or djorie and declaim 'This is my boomstick!'... Youve been wating foor that-"

Ash "Since day one? well yes." :D
:rofl:
Great line, Eled.:clap:
I proudly present you with the "Best Use of the SFX Demon" Snow globe! :globe:
Ultimatecalibur

10-04-06, 08:56 PM		Nakajima (still in the library, books stacked all around him, leans back in his chair) -- What an interesting universe.

A pixie appears infront of him.

Nakajima -- How did you get here, Titsu?

Titsu -- I came here to tell you that you need to get back home.

Nakajima -- Why? Did Ares and Thor get into a fight or something?

Titsu -- No, We know how to handle that.
rampant

10-04-06, 09:14 PM		Ketty - Forbes's office is at the top.

Liam - Let me guess no lifts.

Ketty - Nope.
rwarner3701

10-04-06, 09:32 PM		New posters are always welcome but some people are protective of their characters. Feel free to use them but only if you are going to properly portray them. For help with that check the crew section of the wiki, http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Main_Page or whisper the posters that seem responsible for them, or both. Also maybe the last 5 pages or so can get you current with what is going on and help you find something to work with. If you think this thread is long you should see the other one it was over 100 pages at the end. And watch out for the new guy hazing.

---------------

I was planning to have Gregory study under both Mickey and Lisa so that he still can learn from her but has someone else to go to when he needs to. I am assuming he wants to be more actively involved in the day to day helping and good than the grand scheme of improving the world more like Lisa is. He could grow out of that in time though especially after he sees how Mickey does "good".
Kaizer_Ryu

10-04-06, 09:40 PM		OOC: excuse me sirs,i was wondering if i could join in on this,i haven't had a chance to read the whole thread,like hell i'm reading all that,but anyway i'm good at this kinda thing so if no one minds i would really like to join in this.
Like Eled said, feel free to join in. The only thing we really ask is that you try to keep other people's characters...well...in character. The best way to figure this out is by reading the thread. You don't have to read the original thread to get what's going on now (it's still worth it, though), and the Wiki gives you a good place to start. It can be found here (http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Main_Page). Other than that, make a character, leave your mind at the door, and jump in.

And as far as being protective of our characters...I'm one of the ones rawarner is referring to. My girls get mad at me if someone takes them too far out of character. :D
Gladius_Lucix

10-04-06, 09:50 PM		Ketty - Forbes's office is at the top.

Liam - Let me guess no lifts.

Ketty - Nope.

Liam: Alright. Swarm, stay here with the parts. Ketty, how tall is this thing?

Ketty: That's for me to know and you to find out. :P

Liam: Alright. Guess the only thing to do is get started. You said Forbes' office was at the top; which door is it, or is it the only one?

Ketty: Don't worry. You'll know it.

Liam sighs, and starts climbing the stairs.
rampant

10-04-06, 10:19 PM		Ketty - Will you pick up the pace:mad:

Liam - 100 flights!!! You crazy :censored: :censored:

Ketty - You act as if thats alot:confused:
-------------------------

Tirmek - Oh no, Not you.

Kerrith - (in new robes) Yes me, My mast has given me permission to fireball anyone of lesser rank.

Elina - He means the redshirts.

Sarah - What did you do to this one Tirmek.

Tirmek - Exist it seems like.

Kirreth - *fire-ghk

Tirmek - Will you just go away? please? I hate fighting incompetents.

Sarah - Nice move Tirmek,... I could have done it faster though he got all the way to the first syllable.

Elina - He's turning blue you can put him down now, and doing it with your left hand was just showing off.
Gladius_Lucix

10-04-06, 11:01 PM		Ketty - Will you pick up the pace:mad:

Liam - 100 flights!!! You crazy :censored: :censored:

Ketty - You act as if thats alot:confused:

Liam: Please realize *pant* that I haven't *pant* been training like *pant* all the other people *pant* on this island. *pant pant* So cut me some slack, okay? I spend my time *pant* sitting on a stool *pant* drawing plans.
rampant

10-04-06, 11:08 PM		Ketty - I'm not really island trained either,... Fine.

Liam - I can stop.

Ketty - No.

Liam - :confused: :eek: too fast!

Ketty picks up Liam by the shoulder, and proceeds upstairs at breakneck (at least by Liam's standards) speed. Only stopping at the top where a door labled :evillaugh stands under a coiled serpent etched into the wall.

Liam - (i.h.h. if I wasn't in shock I'd want to see how the face mark moves)
Kaizer_Ryu

10-04-06, 11:34 PM		OOC: I'm sorry about the length, again. But I had to do this. (yes, it's character development, I can't help it). This will give you some insight as to how Terra and Rose began working together.

And :heehee on the smilie door, rampant.

IC:

Terra: *giggle*

Rose: Do I want to know what's so funny?

Terra: Oh, I was just remembering how we met as adults in Q'barra all those years ago.

Rose: Oh...that...

*Flashback*

Rose stands fidgeting at the top of a cliff, obviously waiting for something. He had gotten wind that a big reward was out for some rising star in the drug trade. Whether he wanted the reward or part of the action, he still wasn't sure. All he really knew was that his debts were adding up and he'd already spent everything he'd swindled off King Sebastes.

Rose: *looking off the cliff* Hello there.

An Elven woman in Druidic garb, clinging to the barren cliff, looks up, grunts slightly, and returns to concentrating on climbing.

Rose: Slow going?

Terra: Look, I don't mean to be rude, but this isn't as easy as it looks, so I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't distract me.

Rose: Sorry.

Terra: Thank you.

Rose steps away, pulls out his sword, and takes a few practice swings to loosen up. After a few moments, he peeks back over the edge.

Rose: I don't suppose you could speed things up?

Terra: *annoyed* If you're in such a hurry, you could lower a rope, or a tree branch, or find something useful to do.

Rose: I could do that. I've got some rope with me. But I don't think you would accept my help, since I am only waiting around to kill you.

Terra: That does put a damper on our relationship...

Rose: But I promise I will not kill you until you reach the top.

Terra: *sarcastically* That's very comforting. But I'm afraid you'll just have to wait.

Rose: I hate waiting...*pause* I could give you my word as a Bard.

Terra: *strained from climbing* No good. I've known too many Bards.

Rose: Isn't there any way you'll trust me?

Terra: Nothing comes to mind...

Rose: *very seriously* I swear on the soul of my father, Nightblade Galan,...you will reach the top alive.

Terra: ...throw me the rope.

After pulling her to safety...

Terra: *breathing heavily* Thank you. *begins drawing her weapon*

Rose: We'll wait until you are ready.

Terra: Again, thank you.

She sits down on a rock to catch her breath. Rose sits a little ways away, watching. A question comes to mind.

Rose: I do not mean to pry...but would you happen to be a Gatekeeper?

Terra: *raised eyebrow* Do you always start conversations this way?

Rose: You just look a lot like my mother. She went missing when I was little.

Terra: Can't help you there. I'm an orphan, myself.

Rose just shrugs, slightly disappointed.

Rose: I was too young to remember, but my father told me it was a pair of demons. They took her and my brother and sister away, leaving him for dead and myself to starve. My mother's Gatekeeper brethren found us when they tracked the source of the demonic energies and saved us. When I was strong enough, I trained under both my father and the Gatekeepers, learning all I could so that one day I could rescue her.

Terra: You've done nothing but train all this time?

Rose: Well, more search than train, lately. There's not a lot of money in rescue. I just take these bounty hunter jobs to pay the bills.

Terra: *getting up* Well, I certainly hope you find her someday.

Rose: Are you ready, then?

Terra: Whether I am or not, you've been more than fair.

Rose: You seem a decent woman, I hate to kill you.

Terra: You seem a decent fellow. *pulls out her staff, shrugs* I hate to die.

Rose: *unsheathes his sword* Begin.

They stand off for a few moments, trading a few intermittent blows. Finally they break out into full fledged combat, following each other through the rocks.

Rose: You're using Bonetti's defense against me, ah?

Terra: I thought it fitting, considering the rocky terrain.

Rose: Naturally, you must expect me to attack with Capo Ferro. *begins pushing her back*

Terra: Naturally *falters at the new style, then regains her footing* but I find Thibault cancels out Capo Ferro, don't you? *jumps off a small rise to the sand below*

Rose: Unless the enemy has studied his Agrippa! *jumps down with her* Which I have.

The fighting continues, neither backing down as they try for an advantage.

Rose: *thrust* *step* *parry* You are wonderful!

Terra: *parry* *step* *strike* Thank you. I've worked hard to become so. *pushes him back*

Rose: :) I admit it - you are better than I am.

Terra: Then why are you smiling?

Rose: Because I know something you don't know.

Terra: And what is that?

Rose: I am not left-handed!

Flipping the sword to his right hand, he begins pushing Terra back at an astonishing speed.

Terra: You're amazing...!

Rose: I ought to be after learning from my father!

Backing her into a stone pillar, he has her pinned.

Terra: *strained* There's something...I ought to tell you...

Rose: And what is that?

Terra: :devil: I prepared Bull's Strength today.

With a quick incantation, she pushes him back, and they continue to fight. For more than an hour, they go back and forth. Finally exhausted, they lean against the rocks around them.

Rose: *pant* Ah hah ha...! *huff*

Terra: *wheeze* What's so funny?

Rose: My instincts were right. Killing you would have been the dumb thing to do. I was actually wondering if you could use a partner in your little endeavor.

Terra: *raised eyebrow* ...seriously?

Rose: I'm rather adept at persuasion. I think I could be quite useful to someone like you.

Terra: *thinks for a bit* Ah, well. I was looking for some more help, anyway. But you'll have to work your way up like everyone else.

Rose: Fair enough. Name's Rose. As I said, I'm a Bard. I hope to get to know you better, and soon... :smirk:

Terra: ...ew. Don't get any ideas. I'm not into guys. Try anything, and it's your head.

Rose: All right, all right. Don't get all bent out of shape. I'm a bit of a romantic.

Terra: Welcome aboard, Spoony.

*end flashback*

Rose: :mad: And I still can't get rid of that title!

Terra: :P But still..., you were quite useful in convincing the Lizardfolk to trade with us. One of the few reasons I didn't try to kill you when you grabbed my butt several times on the way back to Adderport.

Rose: Ok, now I have to go scrub my hand because that memory...
rampant

10-05-06, 01:57 AM		OOC: Once more I would like to point out the number of K names is just ridiculous, Now I must hide before they realize that half of them are my fault...I just said that part out loud didn't I.

Count down to conniption 25 hours and counting.
----------------------------------

Fluffy - meowow (i like that)

Slaypaw - merrrllll (oh so good)

Mittens - (mew) See told you they can't not play with the stuff.

Rip - merrrr (mmmmm minty:) )

Tear - mewew (must resist crazy minty goodness)

Shred - mew ( heh this is fun )
Gladius_Lucix

10-05-06, 01:14 PM		Liam just sits in front of Forbes' office for a few minutes.

Liam: Pretty stars...

Ketty: Oh, come off it. I didn't go that fast.

Liam:... and birdies. Hello, birdy.

Ketty just sighs.
Chrys

10-05-06, 01:43 PM		Bloom in the library.

Bloom: Hey is there any here who Help me?

Volrath: I don’t know Can you be helped?

Bloom: Ha, Cute…Look I’m just trying to find my sister; mom got all ****** off when I tried reeducate the rest of my sister, so she sent me here to live the other the one she kicked out.

Volrath: Well you kinda look like a 12 year old version of my girlfriend… minus the metallic skin, Primus shirt and razor grass growing at the feet. Would your sister be named P/Y/R?

Bloom: I don’t know mom didn’t tell me her name… I guess that’s what I get for have a Mother who has more kids then brains.

Volrath: I don’t know where she is right now; But I’ll tell her you are looking for when I see her later.

Bloom: Ok, I’m still going to look… So I’ll be around.
Lord Kale Fangblade

10-05-06, 03:24 PM		There is a dark room, illuminated by several candels is a bed, within said bed is a familiar figure. Sa'vor, though there are differences, he's older and more weathered and his skin has a sickly green cast. about him is an old room, from it hang many many items and trophies. by the bed sits a young man, whom looks a lot like Sa'vor. apart from his eyes, which are violet and the general younger cast to his features. he wears expensive black clothing and on one finger is a signet ring bearing Sa'vors family crest; a black moon obscuring the sun.

Sa'vor: *his voice slightly weaker than priviously* Sithis

Sithis: Yes grandfather?

Sa'vor: You are the latest in a long line of Warlocks within our family. Though your brothers and your fathers side have not born any of Warlocks and nor your many uncels and aunts i have had many a proud moment watching each and every one of your magical powers develop. * his whole body is wracked by a coughing fit* As you probably know im dying...

Sithis: but how could that be grandfather, your immortal. a Vampire like every one of your children. we dont die.

Sa'vor: Somtimes, a body has taken more that it can handel, and over the last few centuries my energy has began to vanish. and by body has began to detiriate. as your grandmother did before that. well, soon it will be my time. and i worry for you My child. for in this universe Warlocks are hated above all else, they are hunted to extinction, and though you are powerful. they will slay you eventualy. do you know how i met your grandmother boy?

Sithis: I think so... my father told me the story once. you had gone wandering the planes in your home universe, when a rift in time and space pulled you through. you got trapped here, and since time here moves so fast its been impossible to get back.

Sa'vor: *another coughing fit* yes. that is true. all but one thing. it wasnt impossible to get back, i figured out how to get home a few years after marrying your grandmother... but i didnt want to return. though i was happy there, i was even happier here with my wife and my lands. so i decided to stay.

Sithis: I dont see how this relates to me...

Sa'vor: Use your head boy! its not safe for you here. but there is one place that will be safe. The Forgotten Freedom.

Sithis: You mean to send me to the forgotten freedom? in your home dimension?

Sa'vor: yes child. its the only place i know you'll be safe. its the only place where you'll be accepted with the dark power that runs through your veins.

Sithis: But im strong! more powerful that even you are! i can defend myself.

Sa'vor: You have power, Yes. but you dont have control.

Sithis: So how do i get there?

Sa'vor: In my labs, beneath the sheet. is the portal. on my desk are two letters. the first is to you. the second is to explain what happened to the crew. hopefully they'll understand. Also, I want you to have this * reaches inside his cloths and removes an necklace* it was your grandmothers, and before that, it was my mothers. *places it in his hand*

Sithis: I...

Sa'vor: No need to thank me child. *another coughing fit* Now go, go find the forgotten freedom. be free.

With that Sa'vor falls asleep.
Sithis rises and places the necklace about his neck. it glows slightly before once again becoming dim. Sithis rises and leaves the room.
***

The deck of the forgotten freedom.

A tear appears in the air above the deck, within it there is only black. the air around it thrums with elritch energy, from it emerges sithis. energy crackling about his hands. he steps down onto the deck. he smiles as the tear closes behind him

Sithis: well.... it looks like im home
rampant

10-05-06, 03:52 PM		Chalky - Not a chance I fought off a freaking Dragon Horde for this room.

-------------------------
Feal'theas - (rocking in the corner of an infirmiry) Sweet lord the tentacles!! The toothy tentacles, ...the paint was everywhere!
-----------------------------

Rose - Oh come on you don't have a clue as to what half that stuff is, and the other half is buried under a layer of paint bomb leavings!!

Chalky - Yes but the shed scales he left in the closet are perfect for my paints, and I know enough to use the lab.

Sithis - Then I'll just evict you by force.

Chalky - I don't think so:D

275. Crew may not be evicted from their quarters just because the new guy is scarier.

276. The use of force for determining room assignments, only works for an unclaimed room.

277. The window is one week after the first claim.

*slam*

Rose - Ow *thud*

Sithis - Looks Like I need to deal with spoony first.
king0thepirates

10-05-06, 04:13 PM		Like Eled said, feel free to join in. The only thing we really ask is that you try to keep other people's characters...well...in character. The best way to figure this out is by reading the thread. You don't have to read the original thread to get what's going on now (it's still worth it, though), and the Wiki gives you a good place to start. It can be found here (http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Main_Page). Other than that, make a character, leave your mind at the door, and jump in.


OOC: well thanks for that,but i don't quite have the time to read through all that,so i'll just toss a couple characters in,someone can toss'em somewhere and i can handle the rest

anyway here they are:

Jeremy Mcquill

CN Male Half-red dragon soulknife7/Wilder 5/Artificer 2

Can easily be described with two words,complete.idiot.
He boasts he has a high intelligence,which is partly true,but has no common sense at all,once blew his hosue up with a foam kitten and gift wrap....yeah i don't know how either.He's quite found of woman and is willing and most likely will drop whatever he's doing to talk to/annoy/grope any nearby girl of age and his idea of what's attractive.Loves the idea of pirateing but is usually to lazy to rob a 4 year-old much less an airship,also a good idea to stay far away from him when playing with something he has a habit of blowing himself(and nearby people)up,has done this 123 times.Claims to be the most attractive man on earth and can get with any girl,this is often true but leads to painful situations for him,case in point when he was run out of a town for getting most of the girls in it pregnet

Dawn

LN Female Shifter Fighter 10/Monk 5

Jere's "babysitter"or bodyguard,she's known him for most of her life and may be hiding feelings for him,beats anyone who brings it up.
Quite beautiful and often a target for Jere's drunken gropeings,however doesn't like to show off the goods as Jere puts it,and will most likely hurt anyone who even tries to hit on her.
Is protective of Jere often getting him out of any trobule he gets himself in,says she does this because of the pay but people have their doubts about that.
urial angel of death

10-05-06, 04:25 PM		Kerrith walks by Sithis. He glances at Sithis. As soon as his eyes register the new crew member he crosses his arms over his chest and falls to his knees in a profound bow.

Sithis: What's that for?

Kerrith: *standing back up* Well you're of draconic descent correct?

Sithis: Yes.

Kerrith: Then you are a noble or representative of one corect?

OOC: His response is up to you Kale.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-05-06, 08:08 PM		Silver: So does that mean that Sa'vor is dead?

Bunny: Can't say: it gets complicated.

13: Well, at least we have some fresh meat to fry.

Silver: So does this mean that Slip is free? Because she would be fun for—

Bunny: Slip who?

13: Never heard of her.

Silver: You know, Slip the pilot of this ship.

13: Jarlot pilots this ship.

Bunny: Even when he's retired.

Silver: So then what am I remembering?

Bunny: Rumor.

Silver: She used to have a small mask that only went over her eyes, a short black cape, yellow tights, and a red shirt with an R on it.

13: Now you're just sounding silly.

Silver: No, I serious here, where is Slip?

OOcat: Isn't she supposed to not exist?

Silver: Who?

OOcat: Who what?

Silver: Who's not supposed to exist?

OOcat: That's what we're asking you.

Silver: How can I be expected to know who doesn't exist and who exists?

13: We don't exist.

OOcat: We think she's talking about existing and not existing in terms of existance.

Coneseaur-of-Weird-Thoughts-OOcat: Whoa, you just…like…blew my mind.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-05-06, 08:28 PM		OOC: No comments on my obvious ripoff of the GREATEST SWORD FIGHT IN HISTORY?! :weep: :weep: :weep:
urial angel of death

10-05-06, 08:42 PM		Volrath is walking around in search of P/Y/R. As he passes Terra he just stops cold for a few seconds.

Terra: What is it? Don't tell me you have more empathetic links.

Volrath: No, I sensed the Prophecy changing. Sa'vor finally escaped it completely. He was supposed to remain on Eberron until its end of times. He was the one who would confront Kanatash at the Gates. He would be the proof that Eberron will still have righteous people left.

Terra: So now that Sa'vor's gone the next in of times will be the last one.

Volrath: Maybe, the future is uncertain. The prophecy still needs time to heal from such a massive rift.

Terra: How do you know so much about the prophecy?

Volrath: It tells of the end of this world. It's kind of my thing.

Terra: And the hitler youth outfit and cat ears.

Volrath: Well it's a game me and P/Y/R are playing I'm Junior Warrant Officer Schrödinger and I have to hunt down naughty Victoria so-

Terra: Too much information. Also you know Schrödinger is probably gay, right?

Volrath: Why do you think that?

Terra: He's a catboy.

Volrath: That doesn't prove he's gay.

Terra: Yes it does.

Volrath: There have to be some straight catboys or else where would new catpeople come from?

Terra: The perverted minds of Japanese people everywhere.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-05-06, 09:04 PM		Terra: You didn't have the same reaction with me, though.

Volrath: It's still in flux with you. You are most definitely an anomaly, something completely unexpected. But the Prophesy is made to be fluid.

Terra: As am I.

Volrath: The Chamber was screaming bloody murder when you came back. Ten years out of their sight, two children instead of the one that was forseen, and something else they could not have prepared for.

Terra: They still have no idea what they're up against. Only a few truly know.

Volrath: Myself and Lisa, right?

Terra: My girls are too young, but I think several of the other Ubers know something is vastly different. Terrek especially. He got off some good readings when I passed out from the transformation. Though I doubt he grasps the full extent of what they mean. I was only in the first stages at the time.

Volrath: :devil: I wonder how he'll react when he finds out.

Terra: They will all know when the time comes. But...

Volrath: Don't worry. Till then, my lips are sealed. I want to see the looks on their faces. :evillaugh
rampant

10-05-06, 09:08 PM		Volrath: There have to be some straight catboys or else where would new catpeople come from?
everywhere.

OR they could simply use the FF as a breeding ground.
----------------------------------------

Kithle - Oh for crying out loud I had finally gotten rid of all the traps that lunatic set and replaced them with my own.!!

Sithis - :confused: (i.h.h. crazy flayer)

--------------------------------

??? - The corruption is spreading.

???2 - Can we Isolate it?

???3 - That has proved only marginally useful in the past.

???4 - Can we please turn on some lights, or at least take off these silly robes, My claws keep getting caught and the sparks are giving me a head ache with the light like this.

???3 - I can't help it I have a head cold.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-05-06, 09:53 PM		OOC: No comments on my obvious ripoff of the GREATEST SWORD FIGHT IN HISTORY?! :weep: :weep: :weep:
OOcat: We have no idea what you're talking about. Seriously, we have the vauge feeling we know where that's from, but it could be from a number of sources we've uncountered.

13: :bored: It's speaking in plural again. Better break out the funny animé.

Silver (searching through the Netflix database): We're running out! We've seen all the good ones!

Panic-OOcat: *random thought* Dragonball!

*chirp-chirp*

Bunny: I don't know about OOcat, but this is going to keep me entertained for a few seconds. :devil:
Kaizer_Ryu

10-05-06, 10:01 PM		OOcat: We have no idea what you're talking about. Seriously, we have the vauge feeling we know where that's from, but it could be from a number of sources we've uncountered.

13: :bored: It's speaking in plural again. Better break out the funny animé.

Silver (searching through the Netflix database): We're running out! We've seen all the good ones!
Fanboy-OOKaizer: :eek: :tantrum: :banghead: OH COME ON!!! YOU DON'T KNOW THE PRINCESS BRIDE BY HEART!!!! :headexplo

*KATHWAP*

Fanboy-OOKaizer falls to the floor, unconscious.

Command-OOKaizer: Sorry about that. You there!

Security-OOKaizer: *salutes* Sir!

Command-OOKaizer: Take him to The Room.
JakeQuistis

10-05-06, 11:18 PM		Allen yawns, waking up in his lab deep within the bowels of the Forgotten Freedom.
"Hmmm... I wonder how long I've been sleeping... Probably not more than 100 years... I might as well see what new crew has come aboard, and what all happened while I was asleep.." Allen thinks to himself, as he goes over to a wall, and pulls a lever.
The supposed vampire then disapears, and reapears on deck, looking around for anyone he remembers.
rampant

10-05-06, 11:19 PM		:evillaugh Door - Forbes will see you now.

Liam - Must resist urge to experiment.

Ketty - It's just a talking door.:rolleyes:
-----------------------------------

Jeremy - Thish ish shome heavy shtuff. *hic*:pint:

Dawn - :rolleyes: :mad: Not again!

Jeremy - Hello hot shtuff

Lisa - Go for the ankles New girl!!!

Michael - Cover your ankles new guy!!!
Charles Phipps

10-06-06, 12:21 AM		Lilly: Dad, I've decided to go on A QUEST!

Rose: Lilly, you're eleven. Or something like that.

Lilly: I MUST WIN THE LOVE OF ELIN!

Rose: Aren't you in love with Sarah?

Lilly: Oh crap! I meant Sarah! Honest!

Rose: Ah, the confused reactions of a boy dealing with lycanthropic phermones.

Lilly: It's TRUE LOVE!

Rose: Of course it is, guy who SHOULDN'T HAVE HIT PUBERTY YET!

Lilly: With all the time travel, chemical experiments, and life threatening situations. You shouldn't wonder some of us have matured quickly.

Rose: Ironic that. So what kind of quest do you intend to go on?

Lilly: A quest to FIND MY ANIME TOTEM!

Rose: Your....what?

Lilly: Sarah and Elin have Narato. I've decided to go on a vision quest to determine what anime character I'm most like. Sort of like how Jaela turned out to be Ruri from Nadesico.

Jaela: Baka.

Rose: Ummm...she's legal now right?

Lilly: Yes, why?

Rose: Oh thank God. I was wondering who that girl that woke up in my bed was.

Ketler: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOO!

Rose: Well Lilly, just be sure to take your brother along with you.

Lilly: Sure I....wait, what?

Rose: Your brother.

Lilly: Ummm.....since when did I have a brother?

Rose: Yeah, well, I have a confession to make son. I cheated on Zella.

Lilly: NO!

Rose: Yes, basically, at the Big Nintendo Conference I had one too many and spent three months imprisoned in some bounty hunter's ship as her sex slave.

Lilly: And people wonder why I'm traumatized.

*a big suit of armor walks up to them and looks like a warforged*

Ivy: BROTHER!

Lilly: Dad, that's Stupid.

Rose: Yes, another thing. I sort of accidentally lost Ivy's body in attempting to ressurect my ex-wife.

Lilly: WHAT!?

Rose: But its cool, I had Andrea bind his soul to Stupid's body. It's not like Stupid was using it. He's been sitting in the corner for the past couple of years.

Lilly: THAT'S HORRIBLE!

Rose: meh, it's the breaks. In any case I present to you this alchemical texts and these warforged grafts just in case you lose an arm and a leg.

Lilly: I've got the sneakiest suspicion my anime quest is already stacked against me.

Ivy: I'm so happy! We can finally do all the things brothers are meant to do!

Lilly: I wanted to be a PALADIN! A Paladin for god sakes!

*he flips through the book*

Lilly: Wait, it says here that PHILOSOPHER'S STONE can make werewolf/celestial/demon hybrids fall in love with you! WE MUST FIND IT!

Ivy: And get my body back!

Lilly: Uhh...sure.
Gladius_Lucix

10-06-06, 12:43 AM		Liam (still lightly loopy from the run/drag up the stairs) staggers into the door frame, then into Forbes' office.

Liam: (rubbing his face where it hit the door frame) Hello, 1, 2, 3, to all three of you Forbeses.

Forbes: What's wrong with him? And how is he seeing triple with only two eyes?

Ketty: He was being slow, so I dragged him most of the way up. He's still recovering.

A roll of Duct Tape enters the office. It some how gives the impression of looking at Liam, and bowing to Forbes.

The Swarm: Do you realize how difficult it is to climb stairs when you have no feet and are smaller than each step? Since it seems that Liam's out of comission at the moment, where do you want the Weirsan Converter installed?

Forbes: Could you get Liam coherent first?

The Swarm: Fine.

A strip of Duct Tape whips off of the roll and lands on Liam's arm, then comes off with a loud rip, shakes off some of the skin that stayed on, and rolls back up.

Liam: Gah! I'm awake! Oh, hello Forbes. Didn't know I'd made it up here already. How do you do today?
rampant

10-06-06, 12:54 AM		Liam - (sees pile labled insurance claims:ton: :ton: :ton: ) Busy month?

Forbes - Actually thats just the last hour.

Liam - Oh... well where do I-

Forbes - Find Illis in Lab 00. Ketty, bring the tape and the parts.

Ketty - *Nods*

Liam - Oh dear!
Ultimatecalibur

10-06-06, 01:12 AM		Nakajima -- (sneezing twice) Great people are saying bad things about me.

Titsu -- Maybe. Anyways, Bastet did not unionize the nekomata, they're cats: to lazy to do anything except eat and make messes.

Nakajima -- Okay, I give up. Why do I need to go home?

Titsu -- Well it involves your wife, the bathroom and the fact she ran out seconds later to talk to Isis, Akna, Saraswati and a bunch of other goddesses.

Nakajima -- She's pregnant!?

Titsu -- Yep.

Nakajima -- Great. Most likely means I going to arrive just as she is giving birth.

Titsu -- Why do you say that?

Nakajima -- One of the rules of being a hero: You always barely arrive at an important event or it gets interupted. Remember my wedding.

Titsu -- Oh yeah, a Great Old One decided to go on a panty raid of an all girl high school, Loki blew up the cake, Susan-oo challeged you to a duel, and one of the guests got attack by a bunch of low-level wannabes.

Nakajima -- Come on lets go. We will probably bump into someone who needs our help. (Leaves library)

--Just out side the library--

Lilly -- Come on Stu..uh I mean Ivy, the library is the best place to find information on things, expecialy if they are dangerous, illegal, expensive or all three.

Nakajima (just exiting the library) -- Hey, shrimp, what are you looking for?

Lilly (fuming) -- I am not so small that you need a microscope to see me!

Ivy -- Uh... brother, I dont think you can win against this Samurai guy. Any way mister we are looking for the philosipher's stone.

Nakajima -- One of those, I've got a half dozen of them sitting on my desk at home.

Lilly -- Great! Where is your home?

Titsu (anime sweat drop) -- Thats the problem its in another dimension, and we need to find away to get back there. Do you happen to Know any mad scientists?
Kaizer_Ryu

10-06-06, 01:21 AM		Lilly (fuming) -- I am not so small that you need a microscope to see me!
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Those were the best parts of the anime. :D
Charles Phipps

10-06-06, 01:26 AM		OOC: And I *LOVED* the sword fight.

And want to see the next round.

IC:

The Adventures of the Half-Metal Paladin and the Full Warforged Alchemist

Lilly: OHHHHHH NIGHTMARISH PAIN! AGONY!

Ivy: Wow, I've never seen anyone have their leg and arm gnawed off by a kobold before!

Lilly: WHY DIDN'T SOMEBODY TELL ME THAT THE FORGOTTEN FORGE ADVENTURE WAS SO DANGEROUS!

Ivy: Actually, that was just a random encounter check.

Lilly: FIRST LEVEL MY ASS!

Ivy: Look at the bright side! We have these conveinant warforged grafts! Let me attach them.

Lilly: OH GOD! ALL THE NERVES ENDINGS! I CAN FEEL THEM ATTACHING!

Ivy: Whoops.

Lilly: Well in any case, I'm sure we've learned a lesson about senseless violence.

*Lilly pounces onto the kobolds and senseless murderous violence ensues*

*A bloody Lilly huffs and puffs afterwards*

Ivy: And that lesson seems to be do more of it...oh dear.

Lilly: I've been thinking about it Iv, we need to become King's Wands.

Ivy: King's Wands?

Lilly: Yes, if we're ever going to find the Philosopher's Stone, Sorcerer's Stone for dumb Sharn kids, then we have to have access to a lot of lore about it.

Ivy: Well we almost got it at that Bogworts place. Then you had to shiv Draco.

Lilly: HE HAD IT COMING! I'm going to miss that Hermione girl. She was developing.

Ivy: But don't you have to pass a lot of tests in order to become a King's Wand? I hear the Alchemy Exams are particularly harsh!

Lilly: Bah, why would they dismiss us?

Ivy: I'm a ghost, we're underage, and you're under the height requirement.

Lilly: WHO YOU CALLING SO SHORT THAT THEY CAN'T SEE HIM WITHOUT A DIVINATION SPELL!

Ivy: Calm down! Calm down!

Lilly: In any case, we have a friend at the King's Citadel. THE FIREBALL ALCHEMIST JACOB HUNTER!

Ivy: Didn't they bump Jacob down from being a Dark Lantern because he went crazy due to the fact he could never catch the Forgotten Freedom?

Lilly: I'm sure he doesn't bear a grudge about that. Besides, that's when he took up magic.

***

King's Citadel office

Jacob Hunter: When I am KING of Breland, I will force all the women in the organization to wear MINISKIRTS!

*Is worshipped by his fellow officers*

Furher Boranal: Hey fellows. I just thought I'd check on you. I'm going to act nice and friendly while still creeping the hell out of everyone.

Jacob Hunter: Yessir!

Furher Boranal: Strange how I was confirmably murdered by Captain Jarlot and now I'm back huh?

Jacob Hunter: I wouldn't say strange sir!

Furher Boranal: You're a real ass kisser you know?

Jacob Hunter: Anything to get me promoted!

Furher Boranal: Of course.

Lilly: Hey, we want to be King's Wands but have no qualifications!

Ivy: I may be undead.

Jacob Hunter: WHAT!? NO WA...

Furher Boranal: *evil smile* Of course you can be!

Jacob Hunter: Oh hell.

Lilly: Look at the bright side. This could be another anime.

***

NERD headquarters

Lilly Ikari: I musn't run away, I musn't run away...

Sarah Langely Soryu: You dork, even though I verbally abuse you. I prance around in a red plug suit and entice you sexually!

Elin: I am female, silent, and vaguely alien.

Lisa Katsuragi: I refuse to be Misato.

Lilly: But...

Lisa Katsuragi: Not even for your adolescent fantasies kid.

***

Freedom wing

Elina Peacecraft: Oh Lilly! I know you've tried to kill me, ignored me, and insulted me at every opportunity but I love you!

Lilly Yui: *holding a gun at Elina* I am....death.

Elina Peacecraft: *swoon*

***

Ivy: And to think we're trying to find the Philosopher's Stone so they'll love us.

Lilly: Hold up, where did this US come from?
cypher_zero

10-06-06, 01:31 AM		Satnak - (i.h.h. note smash Prexoras on general principle, harder if he gets uppity) Um,... What do I do with my tail?

Serene - Hmmmm..., oh here!:devil:

Satnak - :confused: :eek:

Serene slips her hand down and pulls Satnak's tail through to a hole in the dress back.

Serene - There's also a pair of slits for your wings. You just have to look real close to see them.

Satnak - Well then lets go, I need to eat:weep:
The girls walk up to the doors as they open. Terrek stands in the doorway dressed in a fine black suit with his arms folded grinning down at them.

Terrek: Took you time didn’t you?

Satnak and Serene: :embarrass:

Terrek: I figured you would, but now we’ve got to hurry or well be a little more than “fashionably” late. Come.

Terrek leads them down the hall to a set of huge double doors. Terrek walks up to them and pushes them open by hand, striding into the banquet hall with the girls trailing behind.

The nobles and members of the Cabal (OOC: see Teseris wiki) are standing around talking, each with a glass of wine in-hand. As Terrek enters, they all look up and the chatter immediately dies away. Celestials mingled with fiends, and humans with flayers here, all perfectly at ease. All told, only about 40 beings were present, but it was clear that these were some of the most powerful ones in existence outside of the Forgotten Freedom itself.

As they entered, one tall celestial broke away from those he was speaking with to stare at Serene. His eyes then moved to Satnak and then fell. He glared at the ground for a moment and clenched his fists in obvious anger. Terrek ignored him while Satnak took note.

Satnak: (i.h.h.) Prextoras…

Terrek strode out to the middle of the large hall and raised his arms above his head, letting his cloak fall away as he spread his massive wings.

Serene: (whispering to Satnak) See, I told you… Now, when he says our names, we’re supposed to step forward and unclasp our cloaks at the neck with one hand. The cloaks will fall, the nobles will stare, daddy’ll be happy, and it’ll make Prextoras jealous.

Terrek then folded his wings and spoke, his voice echoing slightly in the hall.

Terrek: I bid you all welcome to my humble home! We are gathered today to celebrate a most joyous occasion; my daughter has wed!

The assembled group claps. Several in the crowd make eye contact with Serene and nod, touching their index and middle finger to their foreheads, a sign of respect and greeting. Satnak shifts uneasily from one foot to the other as Terrek speaks again.

Terrek: And now my daughter, who needs no introduction, Serene!

Serene steps forward with a quick backward glance at Satnak and drops her cloak, striking a pose borne of practice as the nobles look on. Prextoras continues to stare at the ground.

Terrek: And now the newest member of my family, her wife, Lady Satnak!

Satnak strides forward and drops her cloak, mimicking Serene’s actions and stands beside her new wife. As the nobles begin to clap, Terrek looks back at the two of them and grins. At that moment, Perxtoras strides forward, an obvious challenge.

Prextoras: (shouting) I will not stand for this! Princess Serene should have been mine to wed; not some foreign bitc…

Terrek: SILENCE!

Terrek steps forward, his right arm outstretched, crackling with arcane energy. Serene grabs Satnak’s arm to hold her back as she too attempts to step forward. Serene whispers quickly in her ear.

Serene: Wait. Let daddy handle it. He said you wouldn’t fight tonight. It’s his empire and he condoned our wedding. Perxtoras speaking out is a direct challenge against daddy’s right to rule because he condoned it. Let daddy handle this.

Satnak: *sigh* Alright… but only because you asked me to.

Satnak looks down at her forearms, the bracers on which are glowing. In the back of her mind, she realizes they’re prepared to transform themselves into any weapon she chose in less than a heartbeat. She smiled slightly; so she wasn’t unarmed…

Terrek continued speaking, never lowering his arm from Prextoras’ face as though he was holding a loaded weapon there, though his arcane strike would have been more potent than any weapon.

Terrek: You have no right to challenge me in my realm, my court, or my home! I personally blessed their union! Choose your next words carefully, or they may be the death of you.

Prextoras hangs his head again and drops his arms to his sides, defeated by mere words.

Prextoras: I… I am sorry my Lord. I should never have questioned your judgment. If… If this is your will, then so be it. I wish her marriage well.

Terrek drops his arm and the dark aura fades away. He then rests his hand on the back of Prextoras’s head as the celestial looks down and speaks softly to him as though he were his son, his voice barely above a whisper.

Terrek: I am sorry for your pain, but I would not deny Serene her love for yours. In time, you will find one that shares your same firey passion, but it will not be Serene. Search elsewhere, but do not loose heart. Now go. I think it best for you to be away for the night. I will speak with you again in the future.

Prextoras nods and spreads his wings, flying above the crowd to exit from on of the massive windows in the hall. As he leaves, Terrek turns to the crowd and smiles again, spreading his arms and causing a several table to appear about the room.

Terrek: Come! Let us eat!

OOC: Rampant, if you have any questions from Satnak for Terrek or Serene, now’s the time to ask them.
.
Gladius_Lucix

10-06-06, 01:42 AM		Liam - (sees pile labled insurance claims:ton: :ton: :ton: ) Busy month?

Forbes - Actually thats just the last hour.

Liam - Oh... well where do I-

Forbes - Find Illis in Lab 00. Ketty, bring the tape and the parts.

Ketty - *Nods*

Liam - Oh dear!

Liam: That's okay. The Duct Tape Swarm is more than capable of carrying the parts itself. That's part of the reason I brought it.

The Swarm: Admit it, that's the only reason.

Liam: No, I seriously like your company.

Forbes: (i.h.h.) His work must be getting to him. He's enjoys the company of a sentient swarm of rolls of duct tape.
Ultimatecalibur

10-06-06, 01:42 AM		OOC:

OOUltimate -- Glad you like it Kaizer. Lets see a shorty with alot of power and a short fuse (makes a check on a list in hand)

Lilly -- Hey.

OOUltimate -- Boy in control of a powerful robotic weapon. (makes another check)

Ivy -- Guess that's true.

OOUltimate -- One pretty boy Gunslinging Samurai sans guns. (third check)

Nakajima -- And whose fault is that?

OOUltimate -- One electrically charged mascot. (check)

Lilly -- Who did he mean by that?

Titsu -- Me! Zio (electricity blasts Lilly)

OOUltimate (makes a second check besides the first entry) -- What else is left? Hey Charles can I send them on a multidimensional journey?
Charles Phipps

10-06-06, 01:55 AM		Go for it.
Ultimatecalibur

10-06-06, 02:26 AM		Thanks

Lilly (returning to the FF) -- That was a lost cause.

Ivy -- Well we could take up that Samurai's offer and go with him on a crazy alternate world adventure.

Lilly -- But where would we find a mad enough sceintist?

Ivy -- Liam?

Lilly -- Don't know where he is, plus the duct tape is missing.

Ivy -- So that leave Ketler, but he has been forbiden from messing with dimensions.

Lilly -- Has that ever stopped him?

Ivy -- No.

Nakajima and Titsu arrive.

Nakajima -- Hey you two. Have you changed your minds or do you want a rematch?

Ivy (covering Lilly's mouth) -- We've figured out someone who could make you the device, but dad told him not to mess with dimensions.

Titsu -- That won't be a problem.

--Later in Kelter's lab--

Kelter standing infront of a table covered by a white sheet.

Kelter -- I now present to you (removes sheet) Jaelaforged.

Lilly -- :uh-huh: Guess I should have expected this.

Ivy -- Well she looks like a nice girl.

Titsu -- Finally someone I can have an intelligent conversation with.

Nakajima -- Not the best form, but not the worst. Really wish I could save right now.

OOUltimate -- Where should we send our heros? I'm thinking Shadowhearts, a Final Fantasy, and a Mirror Forgotten Freedom anywhere else?
Kaizer_Ryu

10-06-06, 02:29 AM		Lilly: C'mon, it'll be fun!

Sarah: :rolleyes: I'm not going to be Winry.

Elina: Oooooo! Widgets! :D

Ketler: NOOO!! I'm no longer needed!!

Lisa: You girls have school. You're not going with him.

Lilly: :bigeyes:

Lisa: *sigh* I'm not going to be Izumi.

OOC: How's that, Charles?
Ultimatecalibur

10-06-06, 02:39 AM		Nakajima -- I need the names of everyone whose going, and a peice of paper signed by your parents or guardian saying I am not to responsible for your well being.

OOUltimate -- Lilly, Ivy, Nakajima, Titsu, and Jaelaforged are defenitly going. Who else is? (better not be half the crew)
Charles Phipps

10-06-06, 02:40 AM		OOC: Hahaha.

Lilly: I wonder how our quest will end.

Ivy: If our adventures turn out like the anime, you won't come back at all and I will have my old body back but won't remember our adventures.

Lilly: Seriously, what was with that ending?

Michael: ALCHEMY IS AN ABOMINATION!

Lilly: Hey, when did you become arabic and get a cool scar on your face?
Kaizer_Ryu

10-06-06, 02:47 AM		Lilly: Hey, when did you become arabic and get a cool scar on your face?
Nalfein: :mage: That would be my fault. :devil:

Michael: :eek: :mad: Kimbley!

Nalfein: :tantrum: Stop calling me that!!! FIREBALL!!!

*FWABOOOOOMMM*

Michael: *now even more singed* Ow. *cough*
Ultimatecalibur

10-06-06, 02:49 AM		Nakajima -- (throws Michael and Nalfien out of the room) Or it could still be unfinished, have even more characters and even more plot twists like the manga. That version had the armor learning to do alchemy without a circle.

Lilly -- (hands Nakajima 2 peices of paper) Here you go.

Nakajima reviews them with an electron microscope.

Nakajima -- You two check out.
urial angel of death

10-06-06, 07:21 AM		Volrath: I guess that makes me Envy from the manga where his true form was actually cool.

P/Y/R: It's plainly obvious who I am.

Volrath: So who exactly will you get killed by?

P/Y/R: Depends on the version.

Elin bursts into the room

Elin: Now I will be on a quest to win Lilly's heart, but unknowing begin helping his arch-rival.

Michael: Thanks for the healing little girl.
JakeQuistis

10-06-06, 07:25 AM		A cloud of smoke suddenly appears near Nakajima and the others, as the only other scientist on board the Forgotten Freedom emerges. Allen rises out of the smoke, coughing a bit, as he waves away the smoke with his cape.
"*cough* I'm never trying that bit again... Ah, yes, you needed a scientist right? I'm obviously better than that two bit human, so why not take me? Plus, I'm one better than a mad scientist. I'm an Evil Scientist! Here's my card." Allen says, coughing a bit more as he hands cards with his information on them to Ivy, Lilly, and Nakajima.
Charles Phipps

10-06-06, 07:43 AM		Ketler: My response is....*BELLLLCHHHHH*

Lilly: are you drunk?

Ketler: You took being the Alchemist away from me too?

Lilly: But you're kind of old now.

Ketler: I'm not old! See, watch me do the Ka Ka KETLER dance!

*claps*

Ketler: Kah Kah Ke...*collapse*

*claps*

Lilly: Pah Pah PARN!

Ivy: Why do you say Parn anyway?

Lilly: Oh that's my real name. Just like Rose's first name is :censored:

Ivy: How did he get named :censored:

Lilly: :censored: if I know.
Chrys

10-06-06, 09:41 AM		OoChrys: I hate Full-metal Alchemist!

Bloom: That’s only because you never read…

OoChrys: So! Now be quite or else…

Bloom: So does that mean I can’t be Sloth?

OoChrys: What’s Three toed or giant flying kind? [
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-06-06, 10:16 AM		Prextoras hangs his head again and drops his arms to his sides, defeated by mere words.

Prextoras: I… I am sorry my Lord. I should never have questioned your judgment. If… If this is your will, then so be it. I wish her marriage well.
Bunny: Spineless wimp!

13: You just want him to die spectacularly.

Bunny: Huh, what gave it away, my being the god of death?

Silver: If all these homonuculi are based off deadly sins then I should be Lust.

Bunny: Oh, not you don't. :mad: You're going to turn this into some pun involving the "****" prefix.

OOC: No, seriously, these three are not to be used in storylines unless you are really sure you know what you are doing.
Gladius_Lucix

10-06-06, 11:00 AM		OOC:
We've known for quite some time that Kanatash's theme song is "The End of the World as We Know It." I've been wondering what some of the other people's theme songs would be. Any suggestions?
rampant

10-06-06, 11:03 AM		OOC: No, seriously, these three are not to be used in storylines unless you are really sure you know what you are doing.

Since when does anyone here know what they are doing?
--------------------------------------------

Satnak - Awwwwwww

Serene - :rolleyes: You wanted to smack him through the floor didn't you.

Satnak - *nods**sheepish*

Serene - Silly girl.

Satnak - (i.h.h. Just play the new girl routine with the nobles, don't even try to blend, don't be disruptive, but don't back down either, .... I hate fancy parties)
------------------------------------------------

Chalky - Bad Moon Rising

Kithle - Mac the Knife

Satnak - Land of Confusion

Fluffy - cats don't need theme music
urial angel of death

10-06-06, 11:04 AM		OOC: I was insinuating that P/Y/R would be lust. Kerrith could be Greed version 2 from the manga.
urial angel of death

10-06-06, 12:39 PM		Volrath- the End

Kerrith- (I can hear the song in my head, but can't think of the name)
Ultimatecalibur

10-06-06, 12:45 PM		Nakajima -- Sorry Allen, but I have already recieved what I need from Kelter.

Allen -- What was that?

Nakajima (points at Jaelaforged) -- Her. I needed a dimentionial gate engine and Ketler put it into a warforged shaped like a little girl. So could you <command allen : go away quickly>.

Allen (runnning out of the room) -- Damn, forgot something.

Nakajima -- Lilly, once again who all is going with us?

Lilly -- You, me, Ivy, the pixie, and that Female warforged. Does she even work?

Jaelaforged -- Yes, I do. I have not needed to say anything since activation til just now. I am currently operating a 68% peak operationial effiency.

Nakajima -- Good, open the gate Jaela.

Jaelaforged -- Proceeding to open gate... 3 hours, 29 minutes, 12 secounds and counting.

Nakajima -- Don't look so glum, we'll spend most of the time saving so many girls that you won't know what to do.

Lilly -- But I only want one (or two) girl(s).

Nakajima -- Most of the time it will be the same girl(s).

Lilly -- :drool: A harem of Sarahs and Elinas?

Nakajima -- :rolleye2: *sigh* Kid thinks big doesn't he.
Lord Kale Fangblade

10-06-06, 02:46 PM		Sithis looks at Kerrith slightly bewildered

Sithis: Ummm... you see my family doesnt actualy repersent the Dragons, In fact when my grandfather entered my universe he and my grandmother together built an undead empire out of what remained of Karranth. My Grand farther rules the largest Vampire house within the country, My mother used to rule the empire but since she died Sa'vor passed it on to his eldest son, Raith, Within House Brokenblade there are thirteen courts. Sa'vor is the Patriarch of the Sanguine Court and each of his twelve children rule the other courts. So you could say that i represent the Black Court, My father, Morvos, is Sa'vors seventh son. and i'm Morvos' Seventh son. I dont really have a lot of power within the empire since im not a powerful necromancer like any of my uncles or aunts or even any of my cousins or siblings.

OOC: I leave the response to you Urial.
As for songs for them, i generaly listen to music as a write and i think the following for me have always struck a particular resonance with my characters
Sa'vor- One step closer.
Naz'roth- Points of Authority.
Feal-Thas- Faint.
Chrys

10-06-06, 03:01 PM		Bloom- Weasle Stompn Day by Weird Al [:P Just wait for it those Tree Rats are going Down! What? I don't like cats either]

Back when I wrote for P/Y/R 'Ride of the Valkeries' allways played in my head
king0thepirates

10-06-06, 03:13 PM		Jeremy: say! did i hear someone say mad scientist? i'm perfect for that!

Dawn: he has a point...

Jeremy: see? besides i got nothing better to do!

Dawn:*sighs*
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-06-06, 04:03 PM		Sithis: Ummm... you see my family doesnt actualy repersent the Dragons, In fact when my grandfather entered my universe he and my grandmother together built an undead empire out of what remained of Karranth. My Grand farther rules the largest Vampire house within the country, My mother used to rule the empire but since she died Sa'vor passed it on to his eldest son, Raith, Within House Brokenblade there are thirteen courts. Sa'vor is the Patriarch of the Sanguine Court and each of his twelve children rule the other courts. So you could say that i represent the Black Court, My father, Morvos, is Sa'vors seventh son. and i'm Morvos' Seventh son. I dont really have a lot of power within the empire since im not a powerful necromancer like any of my uncles or aunts or even any of my cousins or siblings.
Bunny: I have no idea why they go through all the trouble of making up these crazy systems of government. It's supposed to be an excuse to kill anyone you want.

Silver: Or have :pile: with whoever you want.

OOcat: Songs? Let me think:
Bunny: Always kills the music.
Silver: I giggle too much if I think about her an music in the same thought. Pass.
13: Remember the most annoying song you ever heard. Good. Now it's stuck in your head. :devil:
urial angel of death

10-06-06, 04:43 PM		Kerrith: Where the hell in Mistia do you live? Of course you don't represent the dragons a staight thinking dragon hasn't been scene in hundreds of years. I was merely observing your draconic hertige. Thus I assumed you were a noble which turns out to be true. Something I am confused with is you non-dragon heritage. The idea of vampires ruling is completely purposterous. All vampires from Maglin stock are raving beasts, and serving someone who is not only a Hesian, but also an undead is too frightening to even thing about.

OOC: More for you Kale
rampant

10-06-06, 05:22 PM		Tirmek - Alright then Lets try this one. *holds up a horseshoe crab*

Lady - *shift*

Tirmek - I was Right! she can do any arthropod. Lets go find a snowspider.

Kratwe - Isn't she scary enough already?

Tirmek - Ahh its not as bad as some of the people back home,... Have you ever had to share a locker room with an ogre? We'll just keep her away from seige crabs.

DUN DUN DUUNNNNN

Tirmek - who said that?
-------------------------------

Liam - Are there no lifts on this island why all the stairs?

Ketty - Port pads aren't for inner city work, too much interference.

Liam - So unless i get on one of those flying crystals?

Ketty - Its skifes or walking.
Rei32491

10-06-06, 08:38 PM		Theme song for Nalfein: White and Nerdy

Can't think of any for my other characters at this time.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-06-06, 08:57 PM		Theme song for Ash: Fire starter, the Prodogy.
Theme song for Chanse: Nomad, by Metalica (may have wrong name, the one with the line 'And the road becomes my bride...)
My own would either have to be 'Insomnia by Faithless' (Im posting this at 2 in the morning, wont be asleep for another hour minimum) or Gammaster by the Lost Tribe.

( Gladius_Lucix, Id like to thank you for the :globe: Ive had that Gag planned literaly since page one, just took me a while to get the set up right.)
luna18moon

10-07-06, 12:25 AM		Kasei: Another truespeaker? *FURY* JUDGEMENT!
Pillars of holy light rain down on the ship. Kasei begins tossing balls of acid, punctuating each ball with the word "fryacdcdmkll!" Her eyes glow with red light and runes circle around her
Kasei: Fngsfdrknss!
A sword appears in her hands, slicing easily through a redshirt. Kasei's eyes glow brighter.
Slaypaw: Great, you ****ed of one of the main forces of the universe - language. Kasei has enourmous power, but no control over what she does with it at all..
Mittens: *shivers* When she kills someone, their souls empower her words.
Rip: There's nothing but
Tear: fury emanating from her.
Shred: The future's clouding... I feel blind.
Fluffy: This is bad...
Peek and Robin fly down and tackle Slaypaw.
Peek: Aunt Slaypaw!
Robin: The rest of the tribe is gone, but they're letting us live with you!
Slaypaw: It's not safe right now!
Peek: We'll be fine. The tribe protects us!
Mittens: He's right. The cats circle around them... They're more like a force then spirits, though.
Slaypaw: *sighs* All right, but stay away from that girl.
OOC: Great reference to Princess Bride, Kaizer! :D
As for songs, it was a tough thing, looking at the songs I know and trying to find a fit, but:
Slaypaw: Me vs. the world
At the moment, Kasei: What I'm Made Of from Sonic Heroes
Ultimatecalibur

10-07-06, 12:52 AM		Nakajima (playing cards with Lilly and Ivy) -- Whats that noise?

Lilly (discarding two cards) -- Nothing important.

Ivy (draws a card from the deck, jumps up) -- I win.

Lilly -- *sighs* Lost again. Jaela, how much longer till the gate opens?

Jaela -- 0 hours, 32 minutes, 53 secounds and counting

Nakajima -- Another game? (shuffles cards)
luna18moon

10-07-06, 01:02 AM		OOC: This ought to hurt someone, in Tales of Symphonia Judgement deals out pure holy damage.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-07-06, 01:13 AM		I came up with "Welcome to the Jungle" (I think that's the name, at least) for Terra a while back. Of course, that's the old Terra.

For the new Terra, I hear "Ten Thousand Fists" by Disturbed.

Oddly enough, Lisa's theme is "Deify" off the same CD. (I know who the song is referring to, but it's not meant to be a political statement on my part in any way. It just works really well if you stick Krozen in as the one being talked about).

Of course, Sarah and Elina's themes MUST be something involving bouncy J-pop. :D
cypher_zero

10-07-06, 01:41 AM		OOC: Well, I haven't come up with anything that I think "grabs" Terrek specificially, but it'd be Metal. Heavy Metal. Probably something by Demon Hunter.
.
JakeQuistis

10-07-06, 01:53 AM		OOC: Allen, he doesn't really have a song.
"Eh... I guess I'm just not needed here.. What with despite how incompetent that old fool Ketler is, he just always seems to be one step ahead of me.. Might as well just find some other flying ship for me to inhabit." Allen thinks to himself, as he gathers up his belongings and leaps off of the ship, flying off into the horizon.
rampant

10-07-06, 01:57 AM		Kithle - NOt so fast!

Allen - Wha?

Kithle - i'm being a pain the neck.

Allen - Thats an expression you know.

Kithle (in weasel form using the attach ability) - (telepathy) Buts its more fun this way.
Ultimatecalibur

10-07-06, 03:11 AM		OOC: Would the first Slayers opening "Get Along" by Masami Okui and Megumi Hayashibara work as Elina's and Sarah's theme, Kaizer?

Nakajima's is the opening of Samurai Seven "Unlimited" by Nanase Aikawa.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-07-06, 09:48 AM		13: Ftghangatjntgjnapsijbtawjebntajb!

Bunny: Kakakna;kfajlsdkjhtl;akjshljadlkjt;ajndf uawheot7q34rtiqg4orh!

13: 7878yu4rfulauhdvvfausdttuqwhepfggbalsdfg lajsdbnlfghjb!

Silver: Bouncy-bouncy.

13: You win.

Bunny: Seriously, :bored: I'm the god of death, and Silver controls the most destructive force in the animé universe.

OOcat: <summon: Unspeakable One>

*big rumbly summoning noise*

The sky darkens as a shape passes over the sun. A huge monstrousity of tentacles and other horrible things out of hentai appears floating over the Forgotten Freedom.

Caralot: Rosebud! So glad you could join us.

13: This post makes no sense.

OOcat: Word.

Silver: B**bies.
Lord Kale Fangblade

10-07-06, 09:51 AM		Sithis: I live in a parrell version of this world, somwhere where for the last two thousand years House broken blade and its kin have ruled over Karranth. in aporximation there about sixty houses within our country and each of these is allowed by the emporer to rule over a section of land, in turn for this gift the Houses provide Soldiers and other goods to the Emporer. The Houses are also tasked with protecting the Mortals and Undead within their realm, in turn the Mortals provide Food; which in some areas is donating blood or life force and in other areas is donating Cattle and other such animals to be fed upon instead.
We dont pretend to be a perfect system of government, In fact we're far from it, Within the houses and their many courts fueds are almost constantly bursting out. Assassinations and political coups are almost common place. We also dont pretend that we Undead are not monsters, we are. we are perhaps some of the Evilist beings in Reality. we feed off the suffering of others to live. we kill. we maim. all for the pure joy of doing so, how could we even pretend that we where not evil? there is no arguement in existance that can say that we are good and kind people that would not in fact be lies. My father personaly killed one of my siblings when he attempted a coup, by tearing his head from his shoulders.

OOC: your turn Urial.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-07-06, 02:06 PM		Sithis: …
Bunny: What? :confused: The death system isn't the perfect form of government?
rampant

10-07-06, 02:18 PM		OOC: Looks like it works to me.
urial angel of death

10-07-06, 08:06 PM		Kerrith: Oh different plane I understand. Thank you for the rather lengthy explanation. While sentient vampires seems odd, I guess it could happen if evolution took a different course.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-07-06, 08:23 PM		Kerrith: …if evolution took a different course.
Silver: Oh, please. :pbbbtt: As if it was anything other than having a tragic, angsty boyfriend for the hot female lead.

13: So what happens if the female lead is a vampire?

Silver: That's just……wrong. Igor, back me up here.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-07-06, 08:40 PM		Ash apears beside Allen "Before you so abruptly take your leave, might you do the the honour of hearing a propostion My Freind? You see the Confalgaration cup is deeply competatave, and aginst Teams from Kavores military and academic centres we have Aurixirthos, Chalky, Nalfen Pholi and Myself. I am certan an Arteficer of your caliber could be of use, and frankly I find Nalfen, too eratic, rather tiresome. Intrested?"
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-07-06, 08:46 PM		13: So what happens if the female lead is a vampire?


(ooc: :thinks: It becomes a certificate 18 instead of 15, and it has a better box office opening :drool: :rimshot: )
king0thepirates

10-07-06, 08:48 PM		Jeremy:*starts pokeing lilly* hey,don't ignore me shorty

Dawn: look who's talking

Jeremy: i am not that short you big breasted bimbo!

Dawn: who you calling bimbo,shrimp!

Jeremy: arseface!

Dawn: monkey brain!
Rei32491

10-07-06, 09:09 PM		"Frankly I find Nalfen, too eratic, rather tiresome."
Nalfein: I'll show you erratic!

As he prepares to throw a fireball at Ash, a redshirt walks by.

Nalfein: *turns to redshirt* DIE MORTAL!

*Massive crater where redshirt used to stand*

Nalfein looks entirely pleased with himself, until he realizes that he gave up a perfect shot at Ash.

Ash: Told y-

Nalfein: Don't. Say. Anything. :mad:
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-07-06, 09:18 PM		( ooc :gah: :blink: :doh: :banghead: :blush: This is what I get for Coppy / pasting names to avoid typos, I meant KETLER was to eratic, Ash has nothing aginst pyromania. Still I think I can save this.)

Ash "well apart from saying we'll need to work on your fire disapline before the contest I meant to say Ketler is too eratic, hence my inviting Allen onto the team. The prize purse is enough that splitig it one more way will hardly matter and given the Judges will be aginst us we could Probibly use more angles."
Charles Phipps

10-07-06, 09:22 PM		OOC: Excel Saga theme for Elina and Sarah!

:-)

HAIL TERRAPALLAZO!
rampant

10-07-06, 09:28 PM		OORampant - Don't make me use thi...I'm too late aren't I?

OOCharles - Yep:D

OORampant - my pecious braincells:weep:
Kaizer_Ryu

10-07-06, 09:30 PM		OOC: Excel Saga theme for Elina and Sarah!

:-)

HAIL TERRAPALLAZO!
Elina: :D Hai!

Sarah: :w00t: Yata!

Lisa: Isn't that theme a little suggestive to be for them?

Terra: :rolleyes: You expected any less on this ship?
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-07-06, 09:35 PM		OORampant - my pecious braincells:weep:
Bunny: yup, I'm the god of their deaths, too.

13: Except annoying people falls under my domain. I think I have it now:

1. Silver causes life to come into being whatever way possible.

Silver: And a few impossible. :D

13: 2. I kick life along until it's just about ready to die.

3. Bunny finishes it off.

Bunny: And the last step?

13: 4. Silver brings it back.

5. Repeat sideways 8.

OOcat: Kanatash has nothing on you guys. :cool:
Ultimatecalibur

10-07-06, 09:57 PM		Tentacles burst into Ketler's lab and grabs Jaelaforged. Lilly, Ivy, and Nakajima run out onto the deck, and look up at the tentacled monstrity holding most of the female crew, and a bunch of women in school uniforms.

Nakajima -- So this is the god I have to beat the :censored: out of to go home.

Lilly -- :yuck: What is that thing doing to the girl in the sailor uniform?

Ivy -- Which one of the female redshirts do you mean, or are you refering to one of that matched set of nine school girls near the starboard bow?

Rose (eating popcorn) -- Does it matter?

Nakajima -- Captain, could you start up some music?

Rose -- What type?

Nakajima -- Something suitable for a boss battle.

Rose -- I'll see what I can do. (Pulls an electric guitar out of nowhere)

Nakajima (holding his sheathed katana horizontally infront of him) -- Let's get it on.

OOUltimate -- Just a note No females of less than the racial equivalence of 18 years in age have been captured.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-07-06, 10:06 PM		Lisa slides effortlessly out of the monster's grip.

Nakajima: :confused: How'd you do that?

Lisa: :blush: I have...experience in dealing with tentacles.

Rose: :yuck: I did not need to hear that!
king0thepirates

10-07-06, 10:07 PM		Jeremy: wow....thats...new...bloody hell i wish i knew how to paint:tantrum: ...hey wait uh dawn?

Dawn:*hiding in lab* like hell i'm goign out here!

Jeremy: some bodyguard you are...
Kaizer_Ryu

10-07-06, 10:14 PM		Jeremy: wow....thats...new...bloody hell i wish i knew how to paint:tantrum: ...hey wait uh dawn?

Dawn:*hiding in lab* like hell i'm goign out here!

Jeremy: some bodyguard you are...

I quote Silver: "Tentacles? Is that the best you can do?"

:D
urial angel of death

10-07-06, 10:26 PM		Volrath: Oh younger girl have been caputred but due to translation differences no matter how young they appear they are said to be 18 by the narrator.
rwarner3701

10-07-06, 11:03 PM		On the deck

Quill walks out and begins to play back-up for Rose as the fight begins.

----
In Mickey's room

Gregory: Hi! Can you train me to be a cleric?

Mickey: A boss fight, a pyrotechnic compitition and now you my day keeps getting worse.

Piffany: You are already teaching me you could help him too.

Mickey: I suppose but don't get in my way.

Gregory: Yay something to do.

Female Redshirt: I hurt in places I don't want to talk about in front of the kids have anything that can help?

Mickey: Yeah, Gregory get that bottle off the top shelf for Piffany.

Gregory: Here you go.

Piffany: *Purify food and drink*

Female Redshirt: Awww now it is still going to be sore.

OOC: I am assuming that purify removes the alcohol(poison) but not the magic.
Ultimatecalibur

10-07-06, 11:24 PM		Nakajima (begins to draw sword) -- Lost Forbidden Dark Super Shining Great Blinding Divine Lunar God Solar Slashing Burning Blade of Righteous Hope Born from Lightless Ecilpse Sword Attack

After everyone, but Nakajima who is wearing sunglasses, is blinded by an incredible flash of light, a second later the sound of a sword being sheathed is heard.

Rose -- (Rubs eyes and looks around) What happened? How did you cut all of the tentacles off?

Nakajima -- Super secret SSS rank sword maneuver of a dead school of swordsmanship taught to me by a lecherous hermit kensai god on an asteroid in the middle of a blackhole for bringing him a copy of one of the rarest porn mags in multiple dimensions (the cover girl was Terra).

Rose -- You held a copy of Forgotten Freedom Babes Gone Wild Uncensored Hardcore Special Edition Vol 3 Issue 9!? Thats the only one I am missing.

Nakajima -- The double spread of Lisa and Terra was good. Did you know that Lisa has a birthmark shaped like a:censored: :censored: :censored: on her :censored: and :censored:.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-07-06, 11:37 PM		OOKaizer: What Boss Battle music should be playing?

OORei: Does it have to be actual Boss Battle music, or can it just be cool?

OOKaizer: Oh, either one, I'd say.

OOUrial: No question. It has to be the Boss music from Valkyrie Profile.

OOKaizer: I was thinking of the Boss music from FFVII.

OOUrial: Not cool enough.

OOKaizer: :mad: Not cool enough!?!?!

OORei: I vote for the Battle with Gilgamesh from FFV.

OOUrial and OOKaizer stare at him for a moment.

OORei: What? I know the game sucked, but that Battle music ruled.

OOKaizer: How about Parasite Eve Boss music?

OOUrial: Don't know it. FFIX?

OORei: Oh! How about the Battle with Piastol music from Skies of Arcadia? :D

OOUrial: :mad: Enough with the games I don't know!

OORei: Boss music from Ocarina of Time?

OOKaizer: Ooooooo. We could always use that totally badass remix of the FFVI Boss battle music I found!

OORei & OOUrial: :D
Kaizer_Ryu

10-07-06, 11:41 PM		Nakajima -- The double spread of Lisa and Terra was good. Did you know that Lisa has a birthmark shaped like a:censored: :censored: :censored: on her :censored: and :censored:.
Rose: GAHHHH!!! MY BRAIN! MY PRESCIOUS BRAIN!!! OH GODS, THE MENTAL IMAGES!!! WHERE'S KANATASH WHEN YOU NEED HIM?!?!?!

*elsewhere*

Kanatash: :evillaugh :evillaugh :evillaugh

Caralot: What?

Kanatash: Spoony suffering from mental trauma.

*back on deck*

Nakajima: :confused: What's with him?

Terra: I'm his sister.

Nakajima: :eek: :thinks: :lightbulb :plotting: :evillaugh
Ultimatecalibur

10-08-06, 12:52 AM		Nakajima -- Rose having a sister fetish I can understand, but doesn't that mean Lilly is lusting after his cousins. In love with a sibling or one of your parents I can understand, but your cousin? That is something only inbred rednecked Americans and European royalty do.

Rose -- Just one question, but is your wife your sister?

Nakajima -- No, not fully. She was my mother, is a reincarnation of my sister, and we are physically the same age because of I was forced to age at an accelerate rate.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-08-06, 01:10 AM		Nakajima -- Rose having a sister fetish I can understand, but doesn't that mean Lilly is lusting after his cousins.
OOKaizer: That's what makes it funny. ;)

Lisa: :doh: What is it with you people?!

OOKaizer: :D

Rose: I do not have a sister fetish. :mad:

Terra: :rolleyes: Hitting on me constantly didn't seem to bother you before...

Rose: But now it's icky!
rampant

10-08-06, 01:27 AM		Satnak - (i.h.h. Sooooooooooo hungrrrrrrry)

Serene - (i.h.h. She's getting fidgety again)
Charles Phipps

10-08-06, 01:47 AM		Coming tomorrow...

The Adventures of the Spelljammer Forgotten Freedom

and 101 things that the crew is forbidden to do...in SPACE
Charles Phipps

10-08-06, 01:52 AM		Nakajima -- No, not fully. She was my mother, is a reincarnation of my sister, and we are physically the same age because of I was forced to age at an accelerate rate.

Lilly: It's sort of a weird relationship I have with my father Rose.

Nakajima: Uh huh.

Lilly: Well if you hadn't noticed, I'm human.

Nakajima: He's your adopted father?

Lilly: Not that either. You see, I'm Rose's son from a limit break.

Nakajima: What the.....

Lilly: You know, where one of the Final Fantasy people do something cool? Well Rose's is that he becomes a huge bishounen Vampire like the hero from Dirge of Cerebrus.

Nakajima: Uh...huh.

Lilly: He also has a Samurai Limit Break. There's theoretically a Bahamut limit break too.

Ivy: I'm his son from that.

Nakajima: So you're a half-dragon/half-warforged?

*brain breaks*

Lilly: But yeah, that means there's no blood relationship and I can lust ALLLLLLL over my hot not-relatives!

Elin: Eww.

Lilly: Oh please Elin, its not like there's any OTHER cool guys to distract you from the anime LOVE TRIANGLE with me and Sarah!

Elin: Oh by the way, I really liked the garden you made for me Ivy.

Ivy: That's why they call me the Full Metal Botanist!

Lilly: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOO!

Sarah: Oh quiet Lilly, I need to fix your arm. Have you been abusing your warforged grafts?
Kaizer_Ryu

10-08-06, 02:02 AM		Sarah: Wait a minute! Damnit! I said I wasn't going to be Winry! :mad:

OOKaizer: It's funny.

Sarah: No it's n-

OOKaizer pulls out a widget.

Sarah: Oooooooo...pretty... :mymy: :drool:

Lilly: GAH! THE NERVE ENDINGS!!!

Ivy: You had to do that while she was fixing his arm, didn't you? :mad:

OOKaizer: Of course! I have to bug the little brat somehow...

Lilly: :hoppingma :headexplo *grabs OOKaizer and swings him around* WHO DID YOU SAY WAS A BEAN THAT WAS SO SMALL HE DIDN'T SHOW UP IN YOUR EYE?!?!?!

OOKazier: That's not what I said!!
rampant

10-08-06, 02:15 AM		1. Stop shoving Redshirts out the airlock.

2. Explosive decompression is only funny the first 25 times.

3. Also they gum up the hydrogen scoops after a bit.
Crystalforged

10-08-06, 02:58 AM		OOCrystalforged reappears on the scene.

Kanatash: Oh, you're back.

OOCrystalfogred: :confused: You're not going to chew me out for being lazy this time?

Kanatash: Of course not, you have a lot of demands on your time. I understand that you can't always see to me in a timely manner.

OOCrystalforged: Oh, I get it. This is because I left you in an "infinitely" more enjoyable position this time isn't it.

Kanatash: Guilty. :D

OOCrystalforged: Well, any objections if I get it going now?

Kanatash: Nope, go ahead. Then we can go ahead with the honeymoon. :D

OOCrystalforged: Well then let's get this over with.

---

Kanatash: (back at the crater/chaple) Alright, final preperations for the wedding. Hm, all the technical aspects have been worked out but... (surveys the crater) It's still missing something but what? We've got ominous thunderstorm, blasted wasteland as far as the eye can see, and a ceremony performed in the teachings of the great old ones. The atmosphere still needs something though... Ah, I've got it!

He strolls over to a nearby crystal formation. He places his hand on the crystal and closes his eyes. After a moment the crystal begins to glow with an inner light.

Kanatash: (steping away from the crystal) Yo, Jonny! Can you arrange a lighting stike to hit this crystal?

Jonny: No problem dude!

A massive lightning strike arcs down from the black clouds overhead, striking the crystal Kanatash touched. The sound of breaking glass echoes across the plateu as the crystal shatters. Shards of crystal rain across the crater but rather than striking the ground an inner light flares within each shard and they instead hover abover the ground. A few float just overhead while others drift higher up given the impression of a million glittering stars.

Kanatash: (nods) Perfect.
Ultimatecalibur

10-08-06, 03:02 AM		4. Do not give any Giff firearms.

5. Redshirts are not Lifejammer fuel.

6. Do not get in a swearing match with a scro.

7. Correction to 5. Redshirts are Lifejammer fuel.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-08-06, 07:57 AM		OOC: To quote something from another site I post at:
DWARVES
IN
SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE.

IC: Rose -- You held a copy of Forgotten Freedom Babes Gone Wild Uncensored Hardcore Special Edition Vol 3 Issue 9!? Thats the only one I am missing.
Bunny: Silver has a copy. I really shouldn't have to say that by now, but I get the feeling there are some members of this cast who haven't fully picked up on the obviousness.

Silver (talking to the rescued schoolgirls): Come on, let me introduce you to something better than tentacles. :devil:

13: Not enough time, Silver. We have to be at Caralot's wedding.

Silver: But I'm about to—

Bunny: Yes, let's go, before I find out more than I ever wanted to know.
******
The commentary crew are now observing the wedding from inside the now-topless gazeebo.

13: I'm surprised Kanatash recovered so quickly from Caralot's lifestory.

Silver: The man has endurance. :D

Bunny: Save the brain damage until after the wedding?

Silver: :P

There is a general murmur among the gathered crowd as they wait for Caralot to show.

Kanatash: I wonder what she's—huh, not bad.

Caralot appears at the end of the aisle wearing a bikini and a tropical print (the nice almost watercolor kind, not the tacky repeating print) wrap around her waist. She has a lovely orchid in her hair, and carries a pot of vigorously snapping carnivorous plants.

She starts down the aisle (alone, as befitting someone who doesn't know the tradition there is no giving away of the bride by the father here), and a rather traditional wedding march starts until Bunny directs a spellwarped dire dove to eat the organist, who is then replaced by Silver who starts up Caralot's theme: "The Monster Mash".
Chrys

10-08-06, 10:00 AM		8: Warforge can not be used in lifejammers.
9. ... Unless they are female, in a see though lifejammer and nude.
10. Bloom is not Melphina from Outlaw Star
11. Even if Melphina is better name
12. ... Never mind the fact she can make beatheable air and can spelljamm by her self
13. She is more like a Royal Tree any way.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-08-06, 11:23 AM		14: Houce Lyrandar does not have a secrete base in the Tarenta planes where 2 teams are competing for the funding needed to build a new generation of Airship / pilotable Golem hybrids called 'New Edwards'.
15: It is forbiden to create an epic Level Warforged [femail personality] bard by leaching creativity from a human musican made to be her publicist. If you do so said warforged is not to be named after any kind of fruit.
16: Ketler is not Yan newman, inventer of one of the competing prototypes.
17: Devon is not Issamu Dyson.
18: The Giants are NOT Zentradi
19: Nor is there a calculating SOB of a half giant with repressed memorys of harming the Human bard mentioned above cometing for the rival team.
20: this is dull... Ok, so its not dull.
21: For Kybers sake there does not 'Gotta be someody better than these [I}slackers[/] nor is declaming such an acceptable battle cry during airial combat.
22: You will not trancfer the personality of an epic warforged bard into the strucure of a giant built airship what lies under Stormreach during a concert.
And in a break from plagerising anime.
23: Gravaty sucks.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-08-06, 11:45 AM		23: Gravaty sucks.
24: Unless you are Bunny.

OOC: What animé are those from?
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-08-06, 11:54 AM		OOC: Macross pluss, one of the best Mecha animies Ive seen, the Dog fights, with the sky filling with missile trails, are breathtaking.

The Gravity Sucks line is from Livewires, cyberpunk novel Im fond of.
Chrys

10-08-06, 12:18 PM		OoChrys: Mine where from Tenchi Muyo GPX and Outlaw Star...
Ultimatecalibur

10-08-06, 12:55 PM		Nakajima stands at the base of the altar, wearing a fusion of the garb worn by the leaders of a dozen religons, with several dozen holy and unholy smybols are hung around his neck. Caralot arrives and stands opposite of Kanatash.

Nakajima -- Let us begin. Do you Caralot swear to: experiment, breed, mutate, and use Kanatash's genetic data to futher your mission to create a creature so aberrant that it is the cutest thing in the multiverse?

Caralot -- I do.

Nakajima -- (pretends to clear throught but actually says <command Kanatash: Say I do after I finish speaking>) Do you Kanatash swear to: continue causing chaos, destroy peoples minds, dabble in things you should not, perform Caralot's every whim, and sleep on the coach when ever she tells you to?

Kanatash -- I (straining) do.

Nakajima -- With the power I have taken from various gods, goddesses and other immortal beings I now pronounce you master and slave. You may :censored: like bunnies.
Norr

10-08-06, 01:22 PM		25: Zilargo and Karrnath are not competing to build a spelljammer able to land on one of Eberrons moons.
26: Zilargo are also not starting a project called 'moon wars' for the purpose to defend against Karrnathian Intercontinental Ballistic Enlarged Fireballs.
27: Karrnath are not secretly building a device called 'The Death Star'.
28: They're calling it the 'The Death Moon'.
29: Warforged are not to be put in airskiffs as repairmen.
30: They may, however, fly them.
31: Except Stupid.
32: Karrnath is not sending small furry animals into space.
33: They use zombies.
34: Never tell the redshirts to set their phasers to 'stun'.
35: They wont listen.
36: And shoot you in the back.
37: Redshirts are not to be allowed phasers.
38: There are no such thing as phasers.
39: We use wands of lightning bolt.
40: They're better.
41: Redshirts are not allowed scrolls of stinking cloud.
42: They can make those themselves.
43: In space, no one can hear you do so.
44: We do not have canned air (salt free).
45: We do not need to vacuum it up from planets as we go.
46: The spelljammer cannot transform into a maid.
47: No artificer on board are to make this possible.
48: Especially not Ketler.
49: You may not hire an outside artificer to do this either.
50: Any and all distress calls are to be considered a trap until further notice.
51: If investigating a distress call, scan the area thoroughly first.
52: If anything suspicious is found, power up the Magic Missile projectors.
53: If nothing suspicious is found, power up the Magic Missile projectors.
54: Also power up the Chain Lightning Torpedoes.
55: Dispelling Torpedoes are also appreciated.
56: Space-suits are not plug-suits.
57: It is wrong to tell Ketler otherwise.
58: Do not send the warforged for some elbow grease, chances are he'll find it.
59: We are not bounty hunters.
60: We just take their loot.
61: We are not space pirates.
62: Despite beign pirates.
63: In space.
64: And hunted for bounty
65: Okay, we are space pirates.
*scrawled in underneath*
66: And space ninjas.
67: And space ninja pirates.
urial angel of death

10-08-06, 02:28 PM		Palom and Porom are still preforming their light show.

All of the energy converges and slams into Nakajima. The resulting explosion is a massive burst of rainbow colored energy visible for miles around. When the dust clears Volrath is standing over Nakajima's mangled corpse. He is wearing white and red robes, that seem to move of their own accord.

Volrath: Let us begin.
urial angel of death

10-08-06, 02:32 PM		65: Okay, we are space pirates.



OOUrial: At last. Come to me my minions

OOC: To those that don't know my SSB personality is Ridley.
Crystalforged

10-08-06, 02:39 PM		EDIT: Fudge, Urial covered part of what I did while I was tryping. Do you have a preference of which version is canon Urial?



Volrath slips from the shadows behind Nakajima wearing a living breastplate and otherwise standart issue Daelkyr equipment. He sneaks up behind Nakajima and unhinges his jaw before coming down and swallowing Nakajima whole.

Volrath: (straitening his cloths) Now, where were we? Oh, yes my first act is to nulify the previous pact by the power vested in me by the Elder Gods. (pulling out a large black ominous tome) Now let us begin the ceremony.

OOUltimate: Hey wait! What about my character?!

Volrath: Don't worry, he's alive and he'll find his way out eventually.

OOUltimate: But!

Volrath: If you didn't want something like this to happen you shouldn't have tried to hyjack MY ceremony. Anyway we need to get this show on the road.

Kanatash: Yes, (looking at Caralot's "dress") well for one I guess a quick change of wardrobe is in order.

The suit he had been wearing disipears only to be replaced with swim trunks and a surf board in his left hand.

Kanatash: (evaluating his new dress) You guys are all lucky my entity didn't have the balls to put me in a speedo. Anyways, Volrath?

Volrath: Well things aren't exactly going as they should be in a traditional wedding but who ever doubted that. Screw tradition anyways. Call in the flower girl and ringbearer!

Nemesis begins walking down the isle in a black dress carrying a basket of long stemmed white roses. As she goes she tosses the roses into the air where they hang for a moment before plunging downward into the eye of one of people in the pews. After the rose strikes the victems fall over and the rose slowly takes on a crimson hue. Behind Nemesis comes none other than Cardinal Krozen. He is wearing bondage gear with his hands tied behind his back and his legs hobbled. He stumbles down the isle as best he can with the pillow carrying the rings in his mouth and his eyes wide with terror. He stops just before Kanatash and Caralot, wimpering slightly.

Kanatash: (taking the rings) Good boy, now back to Thrane with you. (pats Krozen on the head and he disappears)

Volrath: Well then, do you, Caralot, promise to be a continue your creepy genetinc experiments, explore the things that no one should know, and love Kanatash right up until the day you don't anymore?

Caralot: I do. (peal of thunder)

Volrath: And do you, Kanatash, promise to continue being a sick and twisted SoB who twists others mind, body, and soul on little more than a whim up until the time when you destroy the world?

Kanatash: I do. (annother peal of thunder)

Volrath: I know pronounce you freaks of nature who just happen to be bound in unholy matrimony. (massive lighting bolt splits the sky, vaporizing a noticable portion of those in attendance [all redshirts]) May you :censored: like rabbits.
urial angel of death

10-08-06, 02:48 PM		OOC: Your's is much better Crystal so use that one.
Crystalforged

10-08-06, 02:58 PM		OOC: Your's is much better Crystal so use that one.
OOC: Cool, I did like the light show though, I'd forgotten Palom and Porom were still around, so that can stay at least.
rampant

10-08-06, 03:54 PM		Reception

Kithle - I'd like to make a toast, ahem I think i speak for everyone here when I say: To the Futura and lots of little spawn for the newlyweds... JUst keep them the hell away from me!

Crew - DITTO!
Kaizer_Ryu

10-08-06, 04:16 PM		Lilly comes charging through, sending redshirts and several lesser crew flying. His Warforged grafts have gone wild and seem to have a mind of their own.

Lilly: HOW DO YOU STOP THESE CRAZY THINGS?!?!?!?!?!

Sarah and Ivy follow a ways behind him. Sarah stops briefly to catch her breath.

Sarah: That's why *pant* me being Winry *gasp* is a bad idea.

Ivy: How long have we been chasing him?

Sarah: About three hours.

Ivy: I'm still confused why they made someone without Artificer levels be Winry.

Sarah: :mad: Because it's funny, apparently.

OOKaizer: :D
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-08-06, 04:45 PM		68: Given the fact that a vast number of Mythosian nightmares are sid to dwell among the stars Kantash may not be our Helmsman.
69: Nor may the traveler... Though it would explain a few things.
70: We will not 'Take off and nuke the sight from orbit.
71: No it is not the only way to be sure.
72: We will not imprort a batch of elven redshirts, and declare the Forgoten Fredom a craft world for the tax breaks.
73: This is not the Red Dwarf.
74: Stupid is not Kriten, Kantash is not Rimmer, and Devon is not Lister.
75: Devon, I have it on good athority that your being the last man alive will make no difference.
76: The Dealkyr are not the Drej.
77: No one is to encorage Caralot to develop a prosess to turn Redshirts into Space Marines.
78: Because by the chain of comand it would make Rose Emperor, and thats just begging for a mutany...
79: panic.
80: The simple fact of having a towel about your person will not ensure that your adventures in space go smoothly.
81: Pangalactic gargleblasters are not a paralel evolution of Liquid keelhawl.
82: No one is aloud to hasten the end of the universe in an atempt to prempt the Milliways franchise.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-08-06, 05:40 PM		83: Erk is not Guinan.
84: Despite being very old, listening well and giving advice, and owning a bar.
85: You are not allowed to assume command of the ship by insisting that Rose is Riker, and thus is only second-in-command, while you, who have made yourself Picard-like, are Picard and thus the captain by virtue of making decisions while being all conflicted by the Prime Directive and stuff.
86: Yes, Jarlot is Kirk, in addition to all the other people he is (but denies).
Chrys

10-08-06, 05:43 PM		87: There are NO mini Giant space Hamsters
88: Now one shall have a Gaint Space Hamster as any thing!
89: No Not even crazy Barbairians!
90: No one is allowed to give the Dohwar any surger...
91: Because we are not having a giant penguin love in!
92: We will not sell the a DvD of the giant penguin love called What they do after the march
93: or Real Happy Feet
94: You will not say When Pigs Fly to the Dohwar!
95: Becuase they have Flying PIGS!
96: There are Not 4 Giant planet Eating Giffs!
97: I don't care if they are hungry hungry
98: No one will Ask if Carlot had anything to do with the Bug elves
99: Scro do not have the Mark of *ss-kicking
100!: There is no such thing as a Super Scro with powers of the four elaments

Oochrys: what with things under my name?
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-08-06, 06:00 PM		101: Use the Farce, but beware the dark side...
(Rather Encapsulates this thread, and its predesesor in my opinion.)
Ultimatecalibur

10-08-06, 06:56 PM		Titsu -- Volrath, which god gave you the power to override him?

Volrath -- The Elder Gods.

Titsu -- God. Singlular not plural. Do not say Cthulhu, Nyarlathotep, or Hastur, those idiots are Great Old Ones not Elder Gods.

Volrath -- There is a difference? Did you just say the Unspeakable one's name?

Titsu -- Yes to both questions, and I will say it again. Hastur, Hastur, Hastur.

A yellow mask appears.

Hastur (no sound is made but everyone knows what is said) -- *Who called for me, the King in Yellow, The Priest who is not to be named.*

Titsu -- I did you idiot.

Hastur -- *Oh, Greetings Titania, High Queen of the Sidhe courts, Lady of Storms, Caretaker of Summer. Uhm, where is Master Nakajima?*

Titsu (points at Volrath) -- In him.

Hastur -- *This is going to be very messy.*

Titsu -- Yep. (pulling out an umbrella)

Volrath -- Huh?

A human hand bursts from Volrath's midsection, and then retracts back into the hole. 8 fingers appear and widen the hole large enough for a human sized being to exit. Nakajima steps out.

Nakajima (shaking himself off) -- When did you get here, Hastur?

Hastur -- *Just a little while ago, sir.*

OOUltimate -- Do remember that Nyarlathotep did call Nakajima -sama when he showed up.
Crystalforged

10-08-06, 07:17 PM		OOCrystalforged: Since you asked the God who gave him the power to overide Nakajima was me. I just told him say it was the Elder Gods because that sounded cooler. Besides the point Volrath was scedueled to do the ceremony long before you showed up. Oh, and while I'm here I felt I should inform you of two things. One, I wouldn't recoment using that truespeak stuff on Kanatash again. There's no garuntee that it'll work next time and either way he won't be happy. Heck, right now I'm the only thing stopping him from ripping out Nakajima's soul and sealing inside a tickle-me-Elmo doll. Two, you may have friends among the great old ones but remember, Volrath is related to them and blood is thicker than water. Don't press your luck.
urial angel of death

10-08-06, 07:53 PM		OOC: If by Elder Gods you mean the true gods of Cthulhu mythos then Nyarlathotep very much is one along with Azathoth (sp), Yog- Sothoth, and that other one. Secondly in the FF's eberron Hastur is the god of the dreaming dark and thus was sealed with them and is relatively weak because of this. Thirdly you said that the powers were jsut strong suggestions and thus I think Nyarlathotep would keep the other Great Old Ones in line for his son (Volrath). Not that mention Cthulhu atleast wouldn't do something to hurt his cousin.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-08-06, 07:55 PM		OOCrystalforged: …blood is thicker than water.
Bunny: Mmmm, blood.

Silver: A perfect 10 for bodily fluids!
OOC: If by Elder Gods you mean the true gods of Cthulhu mythos then Nyarlathotep very much is one along with Azathoth (sp), Yog- Sothoth, and that other one.
13: Don't forget Mylarlathotep, Byarbewarethotep, Nyarlathotemp, Yarrrrrrrlathotep, Ultrasotht, Yog-Sloth, Yarrrrrrg-Sothoth, Ataloth, "Lotht", Frethident, Mentident, It'thjuthtadent, and Flippy-Flop. And of course there is the ever unknown Cthulwho.
urial angel of death

10-08-06, 08:23 PM		OOUrial appears and shoots several rounds into 13.
Gladius_Lucix

10-08-06, 08:28 PM		Not that mention Cthulhu atleast wouldn't do something to hurt his cousin.
Speaking of :coolcthul, whatever happened to him? Did he get chased off with Kanatash's family?
Ultimatecalibur

10-08-06, 08:39 PM		OOUltimate -- The mythos has 3 classes of higher beings Great Old Ones, Elder Gods, and Outer Gods. Nyarlathotep is the avatar and soul of the Outer Gods. Yog Sothoth and Azathoth co-rule the Outer gods. The Elder Gods are equal and opposite the GOOs and OGs (with an alignment half way between Nuetral and Good). Nakajima, and his other incarnations, primary enemy is YHWH, who is an Over deity in the MegaTen universe. Nakajima, himself is more powerful than an Elder God, and a proponent of free will.

OOKanatash -- So are you saying that he is equal in power to me?

OONakajima -- Yes, He did say that.

OOKanatash -- How can you do that?

OONakajima -- Similar to how you do it, I just haven't before.

OOKanatash -- :uh-huh:
urial angel of death

10-08-06, 08:48 PM		OOC: Sorry I got two of the classes mixed up. If off if in his game Nakajima ever kills or seriously hurts an Outer God then it doesn't represent them in correctly. Not to mention doing so would probably destroy the universe seeing as they each are the embodiment of a universal force (death, life, time, and Nyarlathotep could be said to be the embodiment of evil though that point is debatable)
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-08-06, 08:48 PM		OOUrial appears and shoots several rounds into 13.
Nothging happens, because 13 does not exist.

13: Besides, they shouldn't have such easy to mock names.

OOUrial: Oh yeah, and what names would you suggest?

13: Bill Gates, Richard Simmons, Opra.

OOUrial: :uh-huh: How can those be an improvement?

13: I can't mock what's already funny.
Crystalforged

10-08-06, 09:06 PM		OOUltimate -- The mythos has 3 classes of higher beings Great Old Ones, Elder Gods, and Outer Gods. Nyarlathotep is the avatar and soul of the Outer Gods. Yog Sothoth and Azathoth co-rule the Outer gods. The Elder Gods are equal and opposite the GOOs and OGs (with an alignment half way between Nuetral and Good). Nakajima, and his other incarnations, primary enemy is YHWH, who is an Over deity in the MegaTen universe. Nakajima, himself is more powerful than an Elder God, and a proponent of free will.

OOKanatash -- So are you saying that he is equal in power to me?

OONakajima -- Yes, He did say that.

OOKanatash -- How can you do that?

OONakajima -- Similar to how you do it, I just haven't before.

OOKanatash -- :uh-huh:
OOKanatash: So you're an quasi-entity too.

OONakajima: Yep. :D

OOKanatash: :bored: Well good for you. Whoopy-do-da-day. Being an entity isn't all its cracked up to be anyways.

OONakajima: How so? :confused:

OOKanatash: You have ultimate power, welcome to the club, so does everyone else and nobody cares. If you try to lord your power over others then they're just going to return the favor and kick you in the teeth in the process. Now sit down, shut up, and let me get on with my wedding reception. You tried to mess with me and **** up my wedding, my entity stopped you and reversed what you did. Suck it up and count yourself damn lucky you were only eaten.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-08-06, 09:16 PM		OOKaizer: <contingency: Nakajima commands> <out of character (benine): Command Terra, Lisa, Sarah, Elina ignore> <out of character (offensive): command Terra, Lisa, Sarah, Elina cause immense pain (physical or mental)> <in character (appropriate): command Terra, Lisa, Sarah, Elina determine point (if pointless: ignore)> <in characer (inappropriate): Command Terra, Lisa, Sarah, Elina ignore/smite> <funny (one shot joke): nullify previous if in character or sufficiently humorous> <funny (running joke): if entity OOUltimate granted permission by entity OOKaizer, nullify previous, otherwise command Terra, Lisa, Sarah, Elina ignore/smite>

OOUltimate: You can do that?

OOKaizer: Yes. Yes I can. They live in my head, so I get to set what they do. :evillaugh :evillaugh NAKAJIMA'S POWERS ARE USELESS AGAINST THEM!!! :evillaugh :evillaugh

OOUltimate: *anime sweatdrop* Why...are you talking in green?

OOKaizer: Why are you talking in Black?

OOUltimate: I...wait, what? :confused:

OOKaizer: Nakajima still has yet to earn anyone's respect-

OOUltimate: :uh-huh: Now it's purple...

OOKaizer: -so he has considerably less influence than you think. Unless it's funny.
Crystalforged

10-08-06, 09:49 PM		OOC: I'm not trying to be rude but I just want to make sure what I was trying to say in my last post was clear. I'm getting the impression that you're suffering from something I like to call the Satnak Syndrom. The symptoms of this are baically attempting to make your personal character stupidly powerful and having him run rampant around the ship doing whatever you please, treating them like they're almighty and noone else can stop them. Now I'm not trying to hold that against you, we always like having new blood around here and most of us have gone suffered from the same thing at one point or another. Heck, Kanatash was the first person to suffer from it, I'm only naming it after Satnak since her case was probably the most noticable. I'm just saying you might need to keep in mind that while Nakajima is powerful so is everyone else and other people don't like having your character walking all over their characters. You can keep doing it if you want but just be ready to accept the reprecussions.
urial angel of death

10-08-06, 09:58 PM		OOC: I'm sure Rei would approve.

Nalfien: Gate!

Nakajima: <command: Nalfien counterspell>

Nalfien: Don't think so.

Nakajima: What?

Nalfien: I'm an epic wizard and wizard trumps all other classes in epic. My will save is so high with buffs that no truespeak will ever work on me.

Nakajima: Well ****.

Nakajima disappears and finds himself in a prison with hands and feet cuffed and a sign reading "freshmeat" is taped to his back.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-08-06, 10:03 PM		OOKaizer: Don't be so sure about that.

OOUrial: Isn't it what Nalfein would do?

OOKaizer: It's not that...

OOUrial: He was planning on doing something like that himself?

OOKaizer: Uh-huh.

OOUrial: Crap.

OOC: We were actually just talking about this about half and hour ago. Don't worry about changing it, though. It can still work at a later date. ;)
Charles Phipps

10-08-06, 10:04 PM		Rose: Hey, remember when they tried to torture us and Jarlot?

Ketler: Yeah.

Rose: It didn't work out.

Ketler: Well torturing other player characters IS tasteless.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-08-06, 10:05 PM		OOKaizer: Repeat after me: "NPC's are not people."

Rose: Exactly. Focus on them. No one cares.
Gladius_Lucix

10-08-06, 10:05 PM		Liam and Ketty have reached the bottom of the administration tower.

Liam: He said Lab 00, right? Where's that?

Ketty: Follow me.

Ketty strides off quickly, leaving Liam and the Swarm struggling to catch up.

Liam: Wait for me!
Charles Phipps

10-08-06, 10:12 PM		Rose: Eh, the Old Ones are all smoke and mirrors anyway.

Terra: Uhhhh Hastur is the Dreaming Dark and Jarlot's father.

Rose: Yeah, so?

Terra: That nearly destroyed reality.

:coolcthul: HEY GUYS!

Terra: I admit, some Old Ones are more impressive than others.

:coolcthul: Want to go get some pizza?

Rose: I'm just sick of the one up manship on this ship.

:coolcthul: Me and Tsagourra wanted to go pick up chicks!

Rose: Hell, Jarlot having Epic levels was a JOKE. Seriously, who takes seriously someone who has godlike power?

Terra: Hey, I EARNED mine.

Rose: Whatever.

:coolcthul: Doesn't anyone love me! I'm Plush!
Kaizer_Ryu

10-08-06, 10:22 PM		OOUrial: :cloud9: :drool: A :coolcthul PLUSHIE!!! :cloud9: :drool: *Death Grip*

:coolcthul : :weep:

Terra: Ummm...

OOKaizer: He can't help it.

Terra: Ooooookay... Anyway, there's a reason I don't use my power to just kill the lot of you.

Rose: Yeah. You secretly like us.

Terra: :rolleyes: Aside from that. But if I told you why, he'd have to eat you.

Chalky: I wonder what Spoony Bard marinated in Redshirt and honey sauce tastes like...

DUN DUN DUUUUUUUNNNNNNNN

Narrator: Tune in next week for-AAAAAUGH!!! MY LIVER!!! WHAT DID YOU DO WITH MY LIVER!!!! *gurgle* *choke*

Rose: Oooooookay...
urial angel of death

10-08-06, 10:59 PM		OOUrial: :cloud9: :drool: A :coolcthul PLUSHIE!!! :cloud9: :drool: *Death Grip*


OOUrial: Admit it! You all deep down want a Cthulhu plushy!
Crystalforged

10-08-06, 11:03 PM		OOCrystalforged: I won't deny it. Cthulhu is my hero, maybe not :coolcthul but you get my point.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-08-06, 11:16 PM		OOKaizer: While a Cthulu Plushie would be great, or even a :coolcthul plushie, the thing I want most is a DOMO-KUN (http://lambcutlet.org/albums/DomoKun/domo1.sized.jpg) PLUSHIE!! All hail Domo-kun!

Domo-kun: RAWR!!!

Marish, Fluffy, Slaypaw, Shred, Rip, Tear, & Mittens: :eek: THE DESTROYER HAS COME!!!!
Charles Phipps

10-08-06, 11:47 PM		As a note :coolcthul isn't the Great Old One of Great Old Ones though the family resemblance is considerable. :coolcthul is actually his teenage son whom won't get off his ass and get a job.

Mostly he just smokes "Hobbit Weed" and eats pizza all day. He's actually the FF's mailboy.

CoC rules put him as a semi-mature Star Spawn!

;-)

And yes, his name for the Wikipedia is in fact "Coolthulhu."
rampant

10-09-06, 12:24 AM		Kithle - Is this the best you can do Nalfein? seriously that's sad. *Gate*

Nakajima - AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH NOT THE CACTUS!! ...oh wait I'm on the FF again... I think I was better off with the cactus.
---------------------------------

OOC: CYPHER!!! when its taking more time for one banquet in Real time, than the whole Honeymoon in game time, it's annoying.
---------------------------------

Liam - *wheeezeeehee* finally

Swarm - Geeze your outta shape.

Ketty - *bangbang*

Liam - AAAAAAAHHHHHH

Ketty - (continueing to pond the ever lovin' daylights out of the door) Jumpy critter, i'm just knocking on the door.

Illis - (opens door and gets a sock to the eye) Hi - ouchuuff... Is her whole family out to get me? oh the guy with he generator is here. Come on down, warning, its a bit of a walk and we can't have lifts down here too expnsive to sheild a big aura like that this close too the generators.

Liam - O joy (sarcasm)
Charles Phipps

10-09-06, 12:32 AM		102. :emp: is not the icon for Jarlot.
103. Despite all appearances.

;-)

104. Just because we're in space does not mean we'll initiate a colony drop.
105. Not even a LITTLE one.
106. Illithids in Space are not any less cannon fodder.
107. Ditto Beholders.
108. AND SUCK IT UP CREW!
109. Ketler is not allowed to build an X-wing.
110. OR A TIE FIGHTER.
111. I don't care if he's already built one!
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-09-06, 08:44 AM		Narrator: Tune in next week for-AAAAAUGH!!! MY LIVER!!! WHAT DID YOU DO WITH MY LIVER!!!! *gurgle* *choke*
Bunny: :bored: You, I really like death, it being my thing and all, but we're kinda going through narrators a bit fast. The next one is going to have to be inedible, I'm afraid.
He's actually the FF's mailboy.
:coolcthul is hooked up to a sled full of mail with 13 driving.

13: Ya! *wh-pish, wh-pish* Ya boy!
OOC: CYPHER!!! when its taking more time for one banquet in Real time, than the whole Honeymoon in game time, it's annoying.
Silver: Awwwww, :( but I was having fun playing "Poses". (currently putting a noble's face in a cake)
Kaizer_Ryu

10-09-06, 11:07 AM		Bunny: :bored: You, I really like death, it being my thing and all, but we're kinda going through narrators a bit fast. The next one is going to have to be inedible, I'm afraid.
Chalky: *gnaw* *chew* *munch*

Bunny: :rolleyes: You do know I don't exist right?

Chalky: :D :P Still won't stop me from eating you.

Domo-kun: *fleeing* RAWR!!!

Cuddles: *in hot pursuit* Stay away from my woman, cat killer!
rampant

10-09-06, 12:05 PM		Fluffy - MEOW (bomber squadron moving to attack formation)

Fluffy twists his wings and moves into a spiraling dive. At the last second he pulls out dropping an acid laced hair ball into the domo-kun.

DOMO-KUN - RARrrrr (twitches feeblely as the acid works its way to the creatures brain)
rampant

10-09-06, 12:56 PM		Back in the honeymoon suite.

Satnak - ...That was interesting.

Serene - I still can't believe you ate the silverware!

Satnak - I was hungry and it tasted good.

Serene - Did you have to eat the crstal glasses to? those were real diamonds!.

Satnak - I was hungry!

Serene - After eating half the feast? Not to mention most of the 6 flocks of geese that passed the window.

Satnak - .... Um the dance party is about to start *anime sweat drop*

Serene - Oh we need to change don't we.

Satnak - yep (i.h.h. phew)

Serene - Good thing I packed some cute outfits for you while i was home:D :evillaugh

Satnak - :eek:
Lord Kale Fangblade

10-09-06, 12:58 PM		Naz'roths Journel,(Naz'roths writing is clear and neat, often it switches between multiple languages and is encoded. in the margin there are many notes and equations as well as some intresting sigils)
Most recent entry;
" Sithis, the new comer to the forgotten freedom is a most intresting character, though in many ways like his Grandfather Sa'vor, whom i possessed for quite some time, he is different in many ways. Firstly, his Warlock powers are not nearly as powerful nor easily controlled as Sa'vors. Also, he has a slightly different build from Sa'vor, a noblemans life is obvioulsy no way to train a warrior.
Though he has some skill it is clearly not as defined, nor does he have the bubbling resovoire of anger and hatred that burned so clearly beneath Sa'vors skin. Another intresting thing is that Sithis is Clearly a blood relative of Sa'vor, i belived that Vampires could not reproduce in the normal sense. though Sithis has stated that if both vampires have drank quite a large quality of blood it is quite possible for them to reproduce, though the child bearer will need to maintain a certain level of blood to stop the child from dying.

One thing worries me though, Sithis describes Sa'vors decent into weakness quite well, aparantly before hand he was stronger than even i could have ever imagined. Obviously his powerleves where extremly high. he also describes Sa'vors skill and subtlety with magic, where while i knew him he always prefered to use vast quantities of energy in a almost random attack method.
even while i knew him i knew he hid some of the extent of his power from everyone whom knew him, if he continued to do this while running the Empire then his power must of been almost godlike. some how i do not belive that Sa'vor is quite as weak as Sithis described.
In Sa'vors Letter he requested that Satnak take his Grandson for training with her colleges back at her home reality. he also requested that I, Tara and Feal-Thas train him with the rest of troops. clearly Sa'vor has seen somthing in the future. Though he didnt see it fit to specify what he's seen. more that saying that it is clearly of great worry.
Perhaps time will reveal the answers i seek."

Tara Diary, ( Her writting his elegant and flowing and written in a almost indeciferable code, in the margins suprisingly there are little doodles of hearts around the name "Naz'roth")
" Sa'vors Grandson, Sithis is an intresting addition. he has the appearance of his Grandfather as well as subtle additions and diffrences, obviously from his grandmothers and mothers side. his appearance is a lot less feral than Sa'vors, and he doesnt have the simmering rage behind his eyes nor the almost huanted look that Sa'vor often had.
The Child is most intrigueing in his discription of the Empire that Sa'vor and his wife, whom he says was Called "Drusilla", formed within his dimension. supposedly each of the Vampiric houses has diffrent strengths and abilities. Though From what i've heard the Sanguine court ( That court that Sa'vor supposedly rules) was the most powerful. Supposedly even Vampire spawn of that court can walk in sunlight and possess strenghts commonly accociated with Vampire lords of our realm.
Discriptions of Sithis's grandfather are also intrugeing. Sithis being only a few centuries old. (very young within the empire). Says that he rarely saw his Grandfather outside the occasional Social gathering and the Battles Sithis attended. Sa'vor seems to have become a new man within this plane, he also appears to be quite happy despire from what Sithis says the almost constant attempts of the other houses to have him killed off.
It seems a shame that he has probably already died. it would of been quite intresting to see what he has built over all these years... "

Feal-Thas's Journel, ( Feal-Thas's writting is Neat and slightly flowing, Most of the entries are on tactics and notes about his mens capabilties. Campaign notes dominate certain areas and the margins are filled with dipictions of troop movements and the odd combat spell Feal-Thas seems to be developing.)
" It seems intresting to me that Father has sent this almost untried youth to us, though i do not doubt his strenght of spell or his ability i do doubt his leadership qualities. Sithis, seems to be rough and almost weak, but beneath the surface i can detect that same Intensity and strength that was beneath my fathers often shifting moods. though he does not have the anger and hatred of my Father within him i have great hopes for Sithis, If he is truely like my Father or to be more precise his grandfather than i am almost exited to see what he has learned from Father over the years of training that he undoubtably went through within house broken blade.
But until the time battle calls once more we will just have to bide our time and see."
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-09-06, 01:13 PM		The wedding reception is going smoothly (though the people aren't giving as much of a crp as Terra and Lisa's or Satnak and Serene's). Kanatash decides that it's time to cut the wedding cake.

Kanatash (leaning over to Caralot as he picks up the knife): So what sort of disturbing and creative filling does this monstrousity have?

Caralot: Oh, nothing so fun. It's just cheesecake.

Kanatash: Ah, so…………:blink:……………[i]Just cheesecake?

Caralot: Mm-hm.

Kanatash: You mean after all the wackiness that went into this wedding, from the guests to the outfit to your potted bouquet, all Greyfeline could come up with was cheesecake?

Caralot: Our entity likes cheesecake.

Greyfeline: "Everything is weird if you think about it too much."
rampant

10-09-06, 01:48 PM		Tirmek - I would prefer if you left.

Sithis - How did you -?

Tirmek - Train with a Drow War Master for 4 years.

Sithis - What are you up to?

Tirmek - Training, now go away.

Sithis - My grandfather wished for me to attend the academy I'm told you attend I wish to see what I'm getting into.

Tirmek - This has nothing to do with the academy. My training with Master Srith predates my acceptance to Open Eye Citadel.

Sithis - Well, then would you-

Tirmek - go away

Sithis - Disrespectful little-

Tirmek - Not you, Kerrith

Kerrith - He is an arrogant little beast man.

Tirmek - Begone the both of you, I will deal with you later Sithis, your request is reasonable, but I have something else to do right now.

Kerrith - Is it that training dummy crafted in your father's image?

Tirmek - *scary glare* How do you know about that?

Kerrith - Master nalfein taught me an interesting spell called summon shadow. They make incredible spies:D

Tirmek - :twitch:

Sithis - :blink:

Kerrith is pinned to the wall by a spear through the right shoulder.
Gladius_Lucix

10-09-06, 01:56 PM		Liam - *wheeezeeehee* finally

Swarm - Geeze your outta shape.

Ketty - *bangbang*

Liam - AAAAAAAHHHHHH

Ketty - (continueing to pond the ever lovin' daylights out of the door) Jumpy critter, i'm just knocking on the door.

Illis - (opens door and gets a sock to the eye) Hi - ouchuuff... Is her whole family out to get me? oh the guy with he generator is here. Come on down, warning, its a bit of a walk and we can't have lifts down here too expnsive to sheild a big aura like that this close too the generators.

Liam - O joy (sarcasm)

Liam, Ketty and the Swarm follow Illis though the lab.

Liam: So, wha...

Liam gets distracted by a gadget that he'd never seen before.

The Swarm: Liam!

Liam: What kind of...

The Swarm: LIAM!

Liam: What kind of stuff do you...

The Swarm: LIAM!

Liam: What do you do here, Illis?
JakeQuistis

10-09-06, 02:09 PM		Allen: Since this is probably your strange and unusual way of saying that you want me around here, I guess I'll stay a bit longer. I guess I can add in a few more traps to the Red shirt's quarters, put in some more security devices that mean absolutely nothing because most people can just pass through them, and work on making some improvements around the place.

And thusly many a Red shirt was killed that night, as they had fallen prey to Allen's various new traps. And everyone rejoiced, for they had fresh meat for chili.
urial angel of death

10-09-06, 02:11 PM		Kerrith: Ahh that stings! You had best to learn some respect for your superiors, beastman. web

Stinky green tendrils shoot out of the ground and immobolize Tirmek.

Kerrith: acid arrow

A bolt of corrosive liquid flies from Kerrith's out-stretched hands toward Tirmek.

OOC: Rampant I have no idea what Tirmek's abilities are so could you help me out here.
rampant

10-09-06, 03:01 PM		OOC: He's an incarnate 5/ erudite 2/warblade 2. His Rakshasa side grants him unnatural endurance.
-------------------

Tirmek - *twist**duck* Your out of your league.

Kerrith - *summon shad-oof

Tirmek - Too slow mage.

The melds around Tirmek's arms are brimming with energy.

Tirmek - *Punch*

Kerrith - gug *back up* *fireball*

Tirmek - *sizzle* Raaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh *charge**grapple*

After a short scuffle. Tirmek has both of Kerriths arms twisted around in a painful looking pretzel.

Tirmek - Lick the floor or I break your...no *breathe in*...*breathe out*...go away. *drop*
------------------------

Ketty - Stop holding shiny gadgets up to distract him.

Illis - Awwwww, anyway this is the generator upgrade room. Here we can mess with the second generator before doing anything to the main unit, so we can work the bugs out.
Gladius_Lucix

10-09-06, 03:48 PM		Liam: There shouldn't be any problems with the Converter. I tested it back on the Forgotten Freedom, and just disassembled it to a point where it could be easily transported. Swarm, let's start cracking open the crates. I'll unpack them.

The Swarm: I'm on it.

Liam: Illis, once this is running, are you going to be in charge of maintenace?
urial angel of death

10-09-06, 04:22 PM		OOC: Well Kerrith shouldn't have tried to cast fireball, because Nalfien hasn't taught him how to break spell rules yet (in 2ed conjurers couldn't cast divination or envocation) Other than that you had him down perfectly. I fully intended for him to lose after all Tirmek is five levels and one template higher than him.
rampant

10-09-06, 04:31 PM		Illis - Nope they just call me in for the big stuff, like the major overhauls. This guy is the head of the regulars.

Warforged Psionificer (Sparky) - Hows this thing gonna hook up? I want to test run this before we switch over to the modified unit. No offense, but I gotta see for myself.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-09-06, 04:53 PM		Bunny is sitting in on the fight between Tirmek and Kerrith.

Bunny: DIE ALREADY!

OOcat: Which one?

Bunny: Well, Tirmek has potential, but too much angst. Kerrith is training under Nalfein, but is too annoying to live. I'd go with Kerrith.
********
Liam (unpacking a crate): Huh? Why is there this (flips through it) terribly written instuction manual? And why are all these various useless bits of paper with technical specs and a tech-support number doing in here?

13: :devil:
Gladius_Lucix

10-09-06, 05:13 PM		Liam: Okay, everything's unpacked. Swarm, let's set it up.

The Swarm: Gotcha.

Sparky: So, how does it work?

The Swarm: Oh, gods.

The Swarm facepalms, while actually having neither face nor palm, as Liam launches into a litany of technobabble that any 'ficer would understand, while leaving anyone else utterly confused.

Sparky: I see. From what I've heard, the Forgotten Freedom would be the best place to test that.

Liam: Yep, and it worked.
rampant

10-09-06, 05:46 PM		Illis - Hook it up to the secondary unit, then we will give it a whirl.

Sparky - Once we get the fine tuning done we can install on the other unit.

Illis - This way we can set the grid to the other unit so we don't need to shut down production while we tinker with this one.

Sparky - Then we plug this one back in and take the other one out to perform the upgrade.

Ketty - So get to work.
Crystalforged

10-09-06, 10:39 PM		Back at Kanatash and Caralot's wedding reception.

Kithle: (holding a mixed drink) Wow, things certainly seem to be going smoothly around here.

Terra: I know, there hasn't been a single odd occurance since the incident with Nakajima.

Kithle: I know and that's what bothers me. This is Kanatash and Caralot we're talking about, the two most screwed up individuals on this ship of miscreants. A normal reception makes me very suspicious. It just means something really big is yet to come.

Terra: You could just be paranoid too.

Kithle: Maybe but it takes a LOT of effort be paranoid around this ship. After all, why would those two WANT to have a normal reception? Just think nothing normal happens with these two. Its just a matter when and what order of magnitude. You know as well as I that Kanatash practically lives to play mind games with people and there's no reason to believe he's not trying to play one now.

Terra: Maybe making people paranoid is the whole point.

Kanatash: (flashing in out of nowhere) Very perceptive Terra. I expected nothing less. I've been carefully cultivating a sense of anxiety for the last hour. Now if you'll excuse me I have to go prepare the portal to our honeymoon destination. (flashes out)

Kithle: ...***hole.

Terra: Told you so.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-09-06, 10:49 PM		OOC: :heehee Crystalforged!

IC:

Lilly is still having trouble with his grafts, as Ketler has gotten a hold of him.

Ketler: :mad: Take the title of Alchemist from me will you! :devil: Quit hitting yourself! Quit hitting youself! :devil:

Lilly: *punch* Oof! *punch* Ow! *punch* Gah!

Ivy: Ni-san!

Ketler: Crap!

Lilly: *punch* Make it *punch* stop *punch* already!

Sarah: You take care of Lilly. I have a saboteur to deal with...

Ketler: :eek: :weep:

Lilly: :crazy: I don't feel so good...

Sarah: You can stand there and take your beating like a good boy, or you could try your luck and run. :smirk:

Ketler stands frozen for a moment before taking off.

Ivy: You wanted him to do that, didn't you?

Sarah: :devil: Woof.

*insert chase scene*

------

Ketler: *on the ground* Ow. *twitch*

Sarah: :( Awwww... I wanted to smite him...

Elina: He wanted me to defend him from you.

Ketler: *still on the ground* Not for free! I offered candy...

Elina: *angry pom* :mad: That you said was in your room!

*commence dual hammer beating*
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-10-06, 07:46 AM		OOC: Computer breaking down. Commentary Crew on hiatus in my head until further notice.

13: Buy a new one already!

Update: I can now post again, but this computer I'm using is used by other people. I may spend long stretches not being able to post.

Bunny: :bored: Like anyone'll notice.
rampant

10-10-06, 12:30 PM		Satnak - I'm not wearing this in public!

Serene - Of course not, I just put you in the bunny suit first so the black leather skirt ensemble would be more reasonable.:D

Satnak - Ooooh I like the top of this one... Where's the rest of it?

Serene - :D

Satnak - :eek:
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-10-06, 12:46 PM		Silver: GET PREGNANT ALREADY!!!

Bunny: Did we mention she's also the god of PMS?
rampant

10-10-06, 04:18 PM		OOC: :ROFL: thats hilarious silver :ROFL:

OORampant - ... She's behind me isn't she:(

Bunny - Ye-ep:D

OORampant - Calm down you over-primped harpy. I have plans.:evillaugh :evillaugh
-----------------------------

Satnak - I'm not showing that much leg!

Serene - :rolleyes: you are too easy:D

Satnak - :embarrass

Serene - You can have the shorts.:)

Satnak - :P HMPH!

Serene - *Toss*

Satnak - *catch* ... seriously whats with you and these tiny clothes?

Serene - Tiny? they go down to the knee!?

Satnak - Think a minute when have I ever shown even that much in public?

Serene - You wear lots of backless shirts.

Satnak - Most of the time under a larger blouse, or vest. Also Thats only since the wings came in.

Serene - ...Oh...my...gods...you are so cute:D

Satnak - :confused:

Serene - Your so confident of yourself most of the time, and then you get all nervous over little things like this. Just try the out fit ok.

Satnak - :embarrass ok *anime sweat drop*
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-10-06, 05:37 PM		13: Interesting: Satnak was once this unstoppable, over-Exalted, Bunny-worshipped, completely broken killing machine with a stereotypical D&D "kill it and find something else to kill" attitude, and now she's completely whipped by this fairy with one moment in the ring and a Silver-inspired wardrobe.

Silver: And yet Bunny isn't complaining.

Bunny: Imagine the children. :drool:
Kaizer_Ryu

10-10-06, 08:09 PM		Arawai: Something is wrong...

Boldrei: :rolleyes: What gave it away? Aureon going catatonic or the Chest of Souls exploding, imploding, burning down and then falling over and sinking into a swamp that shouldn't even be there?

Arawai: Smart ass. But seriously, something big is going down.

Balinor: How big? Schism big? Jarlot destroying reality again big?

Arawai: This is worse than when Terra gave Shadow the finger.

Dol Dorn: :D That was the best day EVER! I'm never letting him live that down! :D

Arawai: ...Satnak is officially whipped.

Host: :eek: NANI!!!!! :eek:
urial angel of death

10-10-06, 08:18 PM		Arawai: You know what this means. We have to find another flusher.

OOC: Rampant if you would like me to I could PM you the basic outline for this plot arc.
rampant

10-10-06, 08:21 PM		Satnak - (Wearing the black, backless top and skirt with black knee-lenght shorts, standing under a sign that reads Rythmic River) (i.h.h. I am so whipped) Here are the tickets.

Warforged Bouncer with Spiked sheild - Have a good time ladies.

Serene - Thanks we will.

Inside

Music pulses from a crystal array, which also provides the light show. The bar and tables take up the back corner of the room, while the entrance winds through the coat room before droppingthe participants onto the dance floor.

Serene - Wow!

Satnak - Yeah...Lets dance!
-----------------------------------

OOC: Urial please do I want in on this :evillaugh:

13 - What is it with you and that Smilie?

OORampant - its shorter than going Mwuhahahahahahahaaheeeheeeeheeeeheeehehe heha everytime. As to Serene's "get Satnak to wear Wardrobe" you haven't seen anything yet.

13 - isn't that "ain't seen nothing yet"?

OORampant - I made a deal with my inner Grammar Nazi: I do my best not to mangle the language I'm using, and he doesn't bother me about other people's mangling.
Gladius_Lucix

10-10-06, 08:57 PM		Illis - Hook it up to the secondary unit, then we will give it a whirl.

Sparky - Once we get the fine tuning done we can install on the other unit.

Illis - This way we can set the grid to the other unit so we don't need to shut down production while we tinker with this one.

Sparky - Then we plug this one back in and take the other one out to perform the upgrade.

Ketty - So get to work.
Liam: Just let me get this straight, first. We install the Converter on the secondary generator, test it out and get it working right, then switch the power grid to that one. After that, we install it on the primary generator, and switch back?
rampant

10-10-06, 09:40 PM		Illis - Not quite. The grid is too massive to run on just one unit for long.

Sparky - So we have three. One is the display unit very big and flashy monster, keeps the tourists happy.

Illis - Then we have these two here in the underground.

Sparky - We usually run 2 of the 3 at 60 percent. Rotating time off to do maintanance on the third.

Illis - Ideally We'd like to get all 3 upgraded.
Gladius_Lucix

10-10-06, 10:24 PM		Liam: I see. Before we make any plans, let's see what kind of power output we get, compared to the current set-up. Which one are we hooking it up to?

After Sparky and Illis point out the right generator, Liam and the Swarm get to work setting up the Weirsan Converter.

Liam: This generator is off, right? I hope so, otherwise there may be power surges over the whole grid.
rampant

10-10-06, 10:40 PM		Illis - Its off or you would be vapor going in without a heat protection effect.

Sparky - Don't touch the other unit.
----------------------------------------

At the party.

The crowd is throbbing along with the music.

Serene - ( i.h.h. Wow she is alot better at this kind of dancing, and she looks great in that cute little outfit. I can't wait to get her in some of the other costumes :evillaugh )

Satnak - ( i.h.h. bloody mol she's so beautiful, i can hardly believe she chose me sometimes. :cloud9: )
Gladius_Lucix

10-10-06, 11:26 PM		Serene - ( i.h.h. Wow she is alot better at this kind of dancing, and she looks great in that cute little outfit. I can't wait to get her in some of the other costumes :evillaugh )

Satnak - ( i.h.h. bloody mol she's so beautiful, i can hardly believe she chose me sometimes. :cloud9: )

OOGladius: Are you sure you didn't help Terrek with Serene?

Silver: :angel:
rampant

10-11-06, 01:27 AM		Tirmek - Ok Sithis this is a basic balance/stretching exercise.

Tirmek gets into push-up postion and levers himself vertical. Then shifts his weight to one hand, while using his other three limbs to maintain balance.

Tirmek - The tricky part comes when you have to move up and down or even crawl on one hand.
----------------------------

OOC: Kale?
-----------------------------

At the party.

Serene and Satnak have moved to the tables.

Serene - How long does this party last?

Satnak - I'm not sure, word is it doesn't, You buy tickets for hours. We have another 4 or so.

Serene - Only 4 more?

Satnak - We just danced for 8 hours straight. Even I need a break after "Sirocco".

Serene - Your butt is so cute in that.

Satnak - :embarrass I still think its a little tight, but if you like it...

Serene - I'll show you how much I like it when we get back to our room.:D

Satnak - :blush:
Charles Phipps

10-11-06, 05:44 AM		OOC: Hey guys, I was curious if anyone would mind serving as preview reviewers for my newest work that I'm switching publishers for. A rousing Space Opera called "Crion's Revenge." Any opinions from those who would like to participate would be appreciated.

IC:

Lilly: Well at last we've found the formula for constructing the Philosopher's Stone!

Ivy: I'll read off the ingrediants!

Lilly: Okay! I'll start the transformation.

Ivy: One cup of salt.

Lilly: Done.

Ivy: 2 tablespoons of sugar.

Lilly: Done.

Ivy: four sticks of butter...

Lilly: Wait a damn minute, are you sure this is the formula for the Philosopher's Stone?

Ivy: That's what it says!

Lilly: Oh fine. Just skip to the SUPER-SECRET *FORBIDDEN INGREDIANT*

Jarlot: *smashes open the door with a long beard and torn shirt* PEOPLE! PEOPLE! THE SECRET INGREDIENT TO PHILOSOPHER'S STONE IS PEOPLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEE!

Ivy: Okay, that's messed up.

Lilly: Not as much as Jacob Hunter killing Sarah's parents.

Ivy: But he was ordered to!

Lilly: Yeah, she's crying her eyes out. I wonder if we should mention Jacob felt really bad about it and took them to House Joralsco to get ressurected.

Ivy: I hope he took them to the first town on the world.

Lilly: Eh?

Ivy: Ever notice that prices go gradually up the further you go from home? Like in Corenea, the price for ressurection is 100GP and outside of Tiamat's lair its like 50,000GP?

Lilly: Well that's because the monsters are tougher.

Ivy: Uh huh? Why DO Manticores and other creatures have tens of thousands of old pieces on them?

Lilly: Ya know, I don't know.

Ivy: In any case, we've learned a valuable lesson from this futile quest. What we needed to make us happy wasn't the philosopher's stone but right here all al....

*ALCHEMICAL FLASH*

*SCREAMS OF DYING REDSHIRTS*

Lilly: Okay, I've got the stone!

Ivy: Oiye ve. Doesn't that remove your Paladin's level?

Lilly: Nah, they're evil. I'm pretty much justified in anything so long as they have that descriptor.

Ivy: Okay....

OOC2: Lilly is now roughly 6th level with 2 levels in Paladin and 4 levels in Transmuter. Ivy is 5th level with 2 levels in Fighter and 3 levels in Artificer.

***

Sarah: What? YOU LIKE IVY NOW!?

Elin: Well he's really sweet and nice plus he doesn't pressure me like Lilly is always doing you.

Sarah: Uhh, we're adolescents Elin. All he does is make dirty jokes then pass out after sneaking some wine.

Elin: Well Ivy doesn't.

Sarah: CAUSE HE'S A WARFORGED! *shakes her hand* An unnatural robot thingie!

Elin: Sarah! Don't be racist!

Sarah: Knock knock.

Elin: Whose there?

Sarah: Ivy.

Elin: Ivy who?

Sarah: IVY WHOSE A GOLEM!

Elin: Besides, I'm not sure if I like boys yet. I think I might like girls.

Sarah: Whoo boy.

Elin: So he's kinda safe and secure until I want to try to see if I like boys that way in a few years.

Sarah: He's not got a robot thingy ya know!

Elin: Then why does he wear a loincloth?

Sarah: :blink: :twitch: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHH!

*runs away*

Kanatash: You learn well Young Padawan.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-11-06, 08:53 AM		Sarah: He's not got a robot thingy ya know!

Elin: Then why does he wear a loincloth?

Sarah: :blink: :twitch: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHH!

*runs away*

Kanatash: You learn well Young Padawan.
Caralot: Ooooooo, really?! :D

Kanatash (to Elin): And yet sometimes it's best to leave these things alone.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-11-06, 10:09 AM		( ooc, what would it entail Charlse, Im a voracious reader, but also kina pushed for time mostly, so i fyou could PM me with details, how much it'd cost me ect I'll see if I can do it.

Also, to every one else the 5 nations conflagaration cup is comming up soon, so this is last call on the Flames of freadom Team line up. curent Roster stands at:-

Ash, organiser and Captain
Nalfen,
Aurixirthos,
Chalky,
Pholli.

also there will be veiwing tickets in the teams boxes for anyone who wants them, watch teams of Khavores formoast profesional seige enginears, Demolitions experts and fire starterters compete fot 10 million gold and all the braging they can get away with. )

Nalfen: "What the hell do you mean I lack fire disapline?"

Ash "Oh, look, a red-"

Nalfen *BOOM* "Ha! got one."

Ash [in stuffy, lawer type tones] "Your honor, the prosecution rests." [normal] "Fire my frend must be controlled, must be bound, must be enslaved to your will, else it shall make you a slave. Twice you have wasted your efforts upon mear red shirts. I fear it will take a third strike to even realise I fear no flame, such is the way of the Pyrokenetic. Flame is a tool, an implament of artsistry, but like a hammer it may be used well or not. In the hands of a common thug a hammer may be used only to destry, in the hands of a smith it becomes an implament of creation. So it is, with flame."

Nalfen "So? the point of the contest is to destroy, what does it matter?"

Ash "I am lead to understand we would ace several events in a givien day during the starting heats, what good will you be having spent your spells in the mornings contest? I fully understand your need to spread the dancing flowers of glorius Imoliation, to inhail there perfume of charing flesh and burning wood, to see them spread by the caress of there flickering petals over all that they can reach... But it is a temptation that must be indulged when we chose, not simply when we are tempted, or we reap a harvest of ash alone..." [strin showing in his voice, he adds quickly] "I will leave you to think on that- I must atend to something." he 'ports away.
Gladius_Lucix

10-11-06, 10:27 AM		A roll of duct tape rolls up to Ash.

The Swarm: Liam would like you to know that he would like to help with any brute force destruction type events. He would, of course, be using Weirsan empowered wands, so finesse of any sort would be out of the question. If there are no more spots on the team, he instructed me to offer the use of a Weirsan Reciever or two if anyone uses staves or wands.
JakeQuistis

10-11-06, 10:59 AM		Allen: I'm not one much for fire. I've had a few bad experiences with it. And not just on this ship.
Allen then goes off to see what this Weirsan generator thing is all about.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-11-06, 11:08 AM		Ash "I am lead to understand we would ace several events in a givien day during the starting heats, what good will you be having spent your spells in the mornings contest? I fully understand your need to spread the dancing flowers of glorius Imoliation, to inhail there perfume of charing flesh and burning wood, to see them spread by the caress of there flickering petals over all that they can reach... But it is a temptation that must be indulged when we chose, not simply when we are tempted, or we reap a harvest of ash alone..." [strin showing in his voice, he adds quickly] "I will leave you to think on that- I must atend to something." he 'ports away.
Nalfein: He's still bound by Spells per day? *snicker* *chuckle* BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Loser.

Nalfein then proceeds to immolate 6 dozen Redshirts with one fireball each.

Nalfein: Spell limits are for whimps.

Kerrith: *big cow eyes* You are incredible, master!

Nalfein: *strikes Zap Brannigan pose* I know.

-----

OOC: Charles, are you talking about Elin or Elina? Because it sounds like Elina. And I'd be open to hearing more about what would be involved in being a previewer.

-----

Sarah: Who, exactly, am I interested in now?

OOKaizer: :tantrum: NO ONE!!! YOU'RE NINE!!!!

Elina: I think it depends on which entity is typing at the time.

Elin: And we keep getting switched. I don't even have the same bloodline as you!

Elina: Indeed. No one as wussy as you could come from my mommies.

Elin: :weep:
rampant

10-11-06, 11:45 AM		OOC: Nalfein Think? this won't end well.
------------------------------------------------

Serene - Wanna make out a bit before we et back on the dance floor?

Satnak - :cloud9: yes

As Satnak is moving her seat around.

Random Barfly - Hello ladies. Might I request the honor of some company on the dance floor?

Serene - No thanks, we're fine.

R. Barfly - This is a travesty, two lovely ladies unaccompanied!

Satnak - Hey! now back off.

Serene - We're not unaccompanied, we're married.

R. Barfly - ... ... *yoink*

Serene - where were we?

Satnak - um... Making out:embarrass
Lord Kale Fangblade

10-11-06, 01:37 PM		Sithis Flawlessly mirriors Tirmek, and watches Tirmeks stance carefully, correcting any errors in his own stance.

Sithis: ( I.h.h) Tirmek seems nice enough, slightly arrogant though. though beneath his skin i can detect a huge resovoire of hate. ( Out loud) Please continue Tirmek.
Charles Phipps

10-11-06, 01:58 PM		OOC: Sorry Kaiser, I always get those two switched in my head.

Mostly cause I just think of them as the same character at different points.

Girls: WE ARE NOT!

But being a reviewer basically means getting 10 chapters of the work as a preview and listing what you like and don't like while suggesting any changes you'd like to see.
rampant

10-11-06, 02:18 PM		Tirmek - Ok now shift to the other hand.

Tirmek bends his elbow then pushes off the ground coming down on his other hand.

Tirmek - The next thing to be careful of is to keep all the blood from going to your head. I can use bio-feedback,... is that even an issue for a vampire?
Lord Kale Fangblade

10-11-06, 02:42 PM		Sithis Continues to flawlessly mirror Tirmeks movements.

Sithis: Its only an issue for half-bloods. at home we used to walk on the ceiling to frighten guests, breathing has never been a problem for us either.
rampant

10-11-06, 02:56 PM		Elina - This the new guy?

Sarah - Time to kick it up a notch. Tirmek, How much weight are we at?

Tirmek - ... 15 per hand, 25 on each arm, 20 per foot, another 30 on each leg, a weighted torso wrap at about what fifty? 230 pounds plus a 60 percent energitics restriction.

Elina - Here's a tip get used to the weights now.

Sithis - Um weights?

Sarah - Who's paying your tuition anyway?
Lord Kale Fangblade

10-11-06, 03:17 PM		Naz'roths Dream.

Naz'roth stands in the dreamscape of his mind, A large hall with huge towering pillars. Darkness covers everywhere where the large braziers flickering light cannot reach. on a raised Diaus sits a image of Naz'roth, he sits cross legged in a black featurless robe. his pale arm is thrust through the surface of a glistening black framed mirror, the reflection in the mirrior is a twisted and evil version of Naz'roth. where Naz'roth is inhumanly beautiful this creature is Ugly to human perception. its Blackscaled skin is punctured and rotting, its flesh is drawn tightly over its bones. its eyes have shimmering silver pupils that burn with hate. its nails have become festering yellow talons, and its fangs glisten with venom. it constantly talks in Infernal, its voice twisted with malice and hatred.

Within the mirror Naz'roths hand is enclosed around the creatures neck, the creatures taloned hands are sank into Naz'roths arm. from which crimson blood leaks. The creature appears to be pulling at Naz'roth and Naz'roth appears to be pushing against it. both of them have their eyes locked upon each other.

Naz'roth heard Echoing footsteps through the shadows, he turned to see a figure approaching. His longwhite hair was tied back, his eyes where violet.
His face was completly unscarred, his alabaster skin was smooth and perfect apart from a single Necromantic rune above his right eyebrow.
around him was an aura of pure eldritch power irridaited from him, young though his features where his eyes showed age beyond his appearance.
His stance was strong and noble and he moved with an almost unimaginable grace. he wore Exquisite Noblemans clothes as black as the void, lined with platinum thread. The silk of his clothes irradiated magical power, on his right hand was a wedding ring of interwoven platinum bands around a single black sapphire. on the second was a signet ring bearing house Brokenblades symbol. As he approached he smiled, revealing Vampiric fangs.

Naz'roth: Sa'vor... you're dead.

Sa'vor: Not quite yet. I've decided to visit your dreams since im not physicaly strong enough to talk to you in person.

Naz'roth: I dont see how you could do it... the energy involved would be imense.

Sa'vor: to you? yes. for me it is not such a drain, i wont go into the specifics of how i did it. I've come to give unto you a gift, as well as a warning.

Naz'roth: What have you seen?

Sa'vor: unfortunatly i cant go into specifics, but know that in the prophecy i have seen things that i cannot allow to come to pass. my warning is this; Do not let your hate get the better of you, do not let it consume you.

Naz'roth: i see... the image... it makes sense. and the gift?

Sa'vor: *raises his hand to reveal a staff of black crystal* This, I crafted it a long time ago. its power exeeds your staff by a lot. though its not intelligent be wary about using its power too much....

The Shadows rushed over Sa'vor and he vanished. Naz'roth turned to face the image of himself. And came face to face with the creature from the mirror. Naz'roth awoke with a start. The Staff from his dream clutched in his hands.

OOC: Im planning on doing similar Dreams for all the characters, so if you all wouldnt mind PMing me a discription of your characters mind as a place (try and work character flaws into it) then i'd be most grateful.
Lord Kale Fangblade

10-11-06, 03:21 PM		Sithis: My grandfarther set aside quite a bit of money for my education here. he always belived in having all of his children and grand children educated. he sent them all across eberron for tuition. Your Terra and Lisa's children yes?
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-11-06, 05:05 PM		Ash "…I fully understand your need to spread the dancing flowers of glorius Imoliation, to inhail there perfume of charing flesh and burning wood, to see them spread by the caress of there flickering petals over all that they can reach... But it is a temptation that must be indulged when we chose, not simply when we are tempted, or we reap a harvest of ash alone..."…
Bunny: :bored: Obviously you need to kill more people.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-11-06, 05:09 PM		OOC: Im planning on doing similar Dreams for all the characters, so if you all wouldnt mind PMing me a discription of your characters mind as a place (try and work character flaws into it) then i'd be most grateful.
OOC: All?!?!?!?! :confused:
rampant

10-11-06, 05:31 PM		Marish - Get me Pickles and Catnip!!!

Cuddles - Yes dear.

Marish - This blanket is itchy.

Cuddles - Yes dear.

Marish - I need help getting to the Litter box.

Cuddles - Oh great E.B.N.E.'s please kill me now.

OORampant - Nope, your pain amuses us.:P

Marish - PICKLES!!

OORampant - yes maam
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-11-06, 05:58 PM		OORampant - Nope, your pain amuses us.:P
OOcat: Seconded.

Cuddles: YOU'RE THE ONE WHO STARTED THIS!

OOcat: Okay then: firsted.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-11-06, 06:46 PM		OOKaizer: Don't I get some mention in this torment? I'm partially responsible for it getting off the ground...

Cuddles: You people hate me, don't you? :weep:

OOKaizer: Oh, you're not the reason I kept pushing this relationship along. He is.

OORei: :banghead: Why?! It's disturbing and wrong! Why oh why do you enjoy this sin against all things so much?! :banghead:

Cuddles: :rolleyes: I think my entity just answered his own question.

OOKaizer: Indeed. :devil: :evillaugh
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-11-06, 08:14 PM		OORei: :banghead: Why?! It's disturbing and wrong! Why oh why do you enjoy this sin against all things so much?! :banghead:
Silver: Failing to grasp your meaning here.

OOcat: I started the relationship, I made Marish pregnant, I'm the one who gets to decide when the kittens are born (I think). If you think this is disturbed than you have no idea what I can do.:evillaugh:……………………What can I do? :confused:

Bunny: You could match up two very unlikely people.

OOcat: Do you know how hard that is?

Bunny: That's why I'm not worried when I suggest it.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-11-06, 08:32 PM		OOcat: I started the relationship, I made Marish pregnant, I'm the one who gets to decide when the kittens are born (I think). If you think this is disturbed than you have no idea what I can do.
OOKaizer: I just find it endlessly amusing that, despite all the other things that happen on this thread (including, but not limited to, lesbian tentacle sex, anything involving Caralot and Kanatash, and Doog and Ishmael Jr.), having a cat turned cat-girl and a horse-sized wolf banging each other's brains out bothers him.

OORei: :mad: It's just wrong!

OOKaizer: :P Which is why I encouraged it.

OORei: :headexplo NALFEIN!

Nalfein: FIREBALL!!!!

OOKaizer: :D Worth it! :D

*KABOOOOOOMM*
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-11-06, 08:47 PM		Ash, adressing the DTS "Tell Liam I woould be glad of his assiatance, and that if Wirsian devises can be made to augment psionic items I would be honnored to carry one."
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-11-06, 08:48 PM		The-Deep-Weirdness-That-Is-Me-OOcat: Quoting the immortal words of Chuang-Tzu, the Chinese philosopher who started Zen: So what?

Silver: Yeah, why care? :P

Bunny: I get to watch depravity every day in my job. This doesn't even rank. :bored:

Mystical-Buddha-Type-OOcat: Remove the skin, and then you shall see—

OOEntities: :eek:

Mystical-Buddha-Type-OOcat: Not what I meant.

Silver: Listen, if they don't have a problem with it, why should you care? I mean, the Valenar druids go among their herds of horses and—

Bunny: They don't want to hear that.

Silver: Oh…well, what do you think a werewolf that lives among wolves does—

Bunny: And not that one.

Silver: I wonder if Terra has every wildshaped with Lisa.…

Make-Everyone-Understand-Nazi-OOcat: Listen, Winter Wolves have an Int score above 2, so they are sentient. That means they can make their own decisions about who they want to :censored:. I think it can be assumed that Marish also has that capability.

Essential-Humor-OOcat: Give it a rest. This is a humor thread! We do things here we couldn't do anywhere else!

Silver: Would it be more disturbing if Cuddles could shapeshift into a humanoid before—

Bunny: *smooch* Goodnight everybody!
Kaizer_Ryu

10-11-06, 09:02 PM		Silver: I wonder if Terra has every wildshaped with Lisa.…OOKaizer: I'd say, but that'd take all the fun out of the picture now wouldn't it? ;)

Make-Everyone-Understand-Nazi-OOcat: Listen, Winter Wolves have an Int score above 2, so they are sentient. That means they can make their own decisions about who they want to :censored:. I think it can be assumed that Marish also has that capability.

Essential-Humor-OOcat: Give it a rest. This is a humor thread! We do things here we couldn't do anywhere else!OOKaizer: :rolleyes: I'm making it humorous. It's a running joke. I'm his brother, so I have to scar him somehow. It's my prerogative as an elder sibling.

OORei: If I really didn't want my character to be involved in that, I'd have said so long ago. I spare no comment on his obsession with Terra and Lisa :pile: ing, :censored: ing, and having :shocked: , so it evens out.
Charles Phipps

10-11-06, 09:20 PM		Flashback to Way back when

Rose: Well, you defeated me Terra and now that makes you the best swordsman on Khovaire.

Terra: Are you the best swordsman?

Rose: No, I'm just trying to make myself feel better about losing. In any case, recovering Princess Zella and Achiga is still going to be difficult.

Terra: How do you know them?

Rose: Well Achiga and Zella are...*blush* and I happen to be *blush* with :censored: :censored: :censored:

Terra: Oh, so you infiltrated the band to rescue them.

Rose: Yes. They are being held prisoner by the most evil and dangerous criminal mastermind of all time.

***

Merrix D'Cannith: INCONCEIVABLE!

Cabin Boy Jarlot: What do I do?

Merrix D'Cannith: Finish him, finish him. Your way!

Cabin Boy Jarlot: Oh, good, my way. Thank you, Merrix. *pause* Which way is my way?

Merrix D'Cannith: Pick up one of those rocks, get behind the boulder, and in a few minutes, the Woman in Black will come running around the bend. The minute her head is in view, hit it with the rock!

*Merrix runs away*

Cabin Boy Jarlot: My way's not very sportsmanlike.

***

Terra: Who the hell is that?

Rose: Oh, that's Cabin Boy Jarlot. He's the son of the Emperor but he was born under an ill star.

Terra: How's that?

Rose: Frogs started to rain, the moons turned to blood, and reality television was all that was on.

Terra: Eessssh! He's huge!

Rose: Jarlot is addicted to Potions of Growth flavored Snapple.

*KRASH BOOM*

Cabin Boy Jarlot: I did that on purpose. I don't have to miss.

Terra: I believe you -- So what happens now?

Cabin Boy Jarlot: We face each other as Dol Dorn intended. Sportsmanlike. No tricks, no weapons, skill against skill alone.

Terra: You mean, you'll put down your rock and I'll put down my sword, and we'll try to kill each other like civilized people?

Cabin Boy Jarlot: I could kill you now.

Terra: Good point, handle this Rose would you?

Rose: WHAT!?

*Terra kicks him forward to wrestle with the man*

Rose: Frankly, I think the odds are slightly in your favor at hand fighting.

Cabin Boy Jarlot: It's not my fault being the biggest and the strongest. I don't even exercise.

*Rose charges and slams into the chets of the huge Cabin Boy, bouncing against him*

Rose: Look are you just fiddling around with me or what?

Cabin Boy Jarlot: I just want you to feel you're doing well. I hate for people to die embarrasse. You're quick

*Rose slips out of a grip*

Rose: And a good thing to.

Cabin Boy Jarlot: I do have a question, why do she wear a mask? Was burned by acid, or something like that?

Terra: Oh no. It's just that they're terribly comfortable. I think everyone will be wearing them in the future.

Rose: *is tossed around by Jarlot* No need for snark.
*Rose jumps on the giant's back and tries to throttle him before the giant slams into a rock and tosses Rose away again*

Cabin Boy Jarlot: I just figured out why you give me so much trouble.
*Rose somehow manages to get back on even as he moves to the side with the next rock move*

Rose: Why is that, do you think?

Cabin Boy Jarlot: Well, I haven't fought just one person for so long. I've been specializing in groups. Battling gangs for local charities, that kind of thing. I'm out of practice.

*Cabin Boy Jarlot slowly collapses as the chokehold knocks him out*

Terra: I don't envy you the headache you will have when you awake. But, in the meantime, rest well ... and dream of large women.

Rose: That's my line!
rampant

10-11-06, 09:45 PM		OORampant - I Owe someone a hugefavor and I need some of your stuff to help pay them off.

Rose - What do I get out of it?

OORampant - One Ghost touch Wiffle bat of collision +2.

Rose - What do you need?

OORampant - Here's a list.

Rose - I don't have these.

OORampant - Thats The other reason I brought the wiffle bat.

Rose - Fine they're in the trunk on the right.

OORampant - Igor!

Rose - He doesn't work for you anymore than he works for me.

OORampant - True...

Igor - Buth ith my thuspiscions are correth, I will have a new mather thoon enough.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-11-06, 11:06 PM		Way back when...continued.

Rose: Why do you get to do the rescue?

Terra: See the Warforged? He's working for Merrix and those associated with him. You need to continue acting the part of henchman. Once Merrix is dead...

Rose: I get him to release my lovelies and they promptly thank me profusely. Works for me. :D

Terra heads around the bend and moves toward a clearing. Merrix has a picnic style setup laid out on a flat topped boulder with two large, flat stones for seats. Behind him, a Warforged holds Zella and Achika, both blind folded, tightly. On the table are a cloth, two goblets, a basket with some cheese and apples, and a wine bottle. As she approaches:

Merrix: So...it is down to you, and it is down to me.

Terra nods and steps closer.

Merrix: If you wish them dead, by all means keep moving forward.

The Warforged squeeses the two women tighter till she stops.

Terra: *calmly* Let me explain-

Merrix: There's nothing to explain. You're trying to kidnap what I've rightfully stolen.

Terra: *walks slowly forward* Perhaps...an arrangement can be reached?

Merrix: There will be no arrangement, *the Warforged squeeses tightly again* and you're killing them.

Terra: *stops again* But if there can be no arrangement, then we are at an impasse.

Merrix: I'm afraid so. I can't compete with you physically, and you're no match for my brain.

Terra: You're that smart?

Merrix: Ever heard of Mordenkainen? Bigby? Otiluke? *she nods* Morons.

Terra: Really? Then in that case, I challenge you to a battle of wits.

Merrix: For the hostages? *she nods* To the death?! *nods again* I accept.

Terra: Good, now pour the wine. *sits*

Merrix fills the goblets as Terra pulls out a small packet from her satchel and hands it to him.

Terra: Inhale this, but do not touch.

Merrix: *sniff* *shrug* I smell nothing. *hands it back*

Terra: What you do not smell is called Iocane powder. It is odorless, tasteless, dissolves instantly in liquid...and is among the more deadly poisons known to humanoids.

Terra takes the goblets and turns around. Merrix watches silently as she pours the powder into one of the goblets, which one he cannot tell. Turning back, she sets the goblets back on the table, the Iocane packet empty.

Terra: All right: Where is the poison? The battle of wits has begun. It ends when you decide and we both drink, and find out who is right...and who is dead.

Merrix: But it's so simple. All I have to do is divine from what I know of you. Are you the sort of woman who would but the poison into her own goblet, or her enemy's? Now, a clever woman would put the poison into her own goblet, because only a great fool would reach for what he was given. I'm not a great fool, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you. But you must have known I was not a great fool; you would have counted on it, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me!

Terra: You've made your decision, then?

Merrix: *laughs* Not remotely. Because Iocane comes from Xendric, as everyone knows. And Xendric is entirely peopled with Rogues. And Rogues are used to having people not trust them, as you are not trusted by me. So I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you.

Terra: *slightly sarcastic* Truly, you have a dizzying intellect...

Merrix: Wait till I get going! ...where was I?

Terra: Xendric.

Merrix: Yes, Xendric. You must have suspected I would have known the powder's origin, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me.

Terra: You're just stalling now.

Merrix: You'd like to think that, wouldn't you?! You've beaten my giant, which means you're exceptionally strong. So, you could have put the poison in your own goblet, trusting on your strength to save you. So I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you. But! You've also bested my Swordsman which means you must have studied. And in studying, you must have learned that humanoids are mortal so you would have put the poison as far from yourself as possible, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me!

Terra: You're trying to trick me into giving something away...it won't work.

Merrix: It has worked! You've given everything away! I know where the poison is!

Terra: Then make your choice.

Merrix: I will! And I choose-*OBVIOUSLY FAKE GASP* *points* What in the world can that be?!

Terra: *turns* What?! Where?! I don't see anything...

Merrix switches the goblets quietly as she looks. When she turns back, he looks innocent and tries not to laugh.

Merrix: Oh, well I-I could have sworn I saw something...*chuckle*

Terra: What's so funny?

Merrix: Uh...I-I'll tell you later. But first, let's drink. Me from my glass, and you from yours.

They pick up their goblets and drink. As they finish, Terra speaks up.

Terra: You guessed wrong.

Merrix: *laughing* You only think I guessed wrong, that's what's so funny! I switched glasses while your back was turned. Ha ha, you fool! *Terra remains calm* You fell victim to one of the classic blunders! The most famous is "Never get involved in a land war in Sarlona". But only slightly less well known is this: "Never go in against a D'Cannith when death is on the line"! Ah hah hah ha ha hahaha!!! Ah hahahahahahahah!!!! Ah ha ha ha-! *falls over dead*

The Warforged stands confused as Rose walks up to it.

Rose: Ok, Stupid, you can let them go now. I'll take it from here.

Stupid: Whatever, meatbag. *drops the two women*

Rose undoes the blindfolds, but finds his reception less than what he intended.

Achika: :mad: And who is she? :mad:

Rose: I-

Zella: You are just plain lousy at this! Not only did it take you forever to free us, but you had to get help to do it!

Rose: But-

After much verbal abuse of Rose and some introductions:

Achika: So all that time it was your cup that was poisoned...

Terra: They both were. I have a natural immunity to poisons.

Zella: Who are you, exactly?

Terra: I am no one to be trifled with. That is all you need know at this time. Rose!

Rose: *drawing small circles in the ground* :raincloud ...I saved you, didn't I...?

Terra: Bring the Warforged and lets go.

Zella: *raised eyebrow* You even let her order you around? *groan* Wuss...

Rose: :raincloud

OOC: There you go, part three of The Princess Zella (and Achika).
Kaizer_Ryu

10-11-06, 11:32 PM		Ketler: I call bull! If you two killed my real dad, then how am I here?

Rose: Oh, I hocked his body at the pawn shop. For some wierd reason, the cops were less than happy about it. I got away, but House Cannith had him Resurrected.

Terra: There's something else you should know.

Ketler: What?

Terra: I am your mother's sister's cousin's best friend's penpal's former roommate.

Ketler: :confused: So...what does that make us?

Terra: :P Absolutely nothing.
Charles Phipps

10-12-06, 12:16 AM		OOC: HAhahaa! Bravo Kaiser.

Loved the addenum.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-12-06, 12:20 AM		:bow: Thank you. Of course, almost all the credit has to go to all those involved in making The Princess Bride. When you're working with perfection, how can you lose? :D

I came up with the addendum when my inner Plot-hole Nazi reared his ugly head. I knew I kept him around for something...

Of course, I loved how Terra made Rose fight Big McLarge Jarlot. That is precisely the kind of thing she'd do. :thumbsup:
rampant

10-12-06, 12:44 AM		Serene - Oh you were so hot out there.

Satnak - :embarrass I guess I just let loose a little more when I'm doing something physical.

Serene - Oh ho:plotting:

Satnak - :blush:
-------------------------------------

Satnak - Why am I still wearing this?

Serene - Because the shorts get in the way, but the rest of the dress really doesn't.
rampant

10-12-06, 02:07 AM		Sithis - Your wearing weights?

Tirmek - So?

Sithis - Ok putting aside my feelings of inferiority. Isn't that a little cliche? I mean the whole "I've been wearing weights the whole fight, and using 40% of my power".

Tirmek - Huh?

Elina - Yeah it sounds hokey.

Sarah - But the first thing you do for a real fight is drop the weights and un bind the limiters.

Sithis - Ah "don't play with your food"
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-12-06, 08:08 AM		Sithis - Ok putting aside my feelings of inferiority. Isn't that a little cliche? I mean the whole "I've been wearing weights the whole fight, and using 40% of my power".
Bunny: Nah, what's really cliché is this whole "I wear weights all the time, that makes me really phsycially strong, so I can certainly beat you." Please :P As Terra has shown, cheating is the way to go.
*******
Sakura sits in Erk's Place, waiting for Weylin to come on duty so she can dreamily watch him from afar, her crush preventing her from talking to him. However, today is to be a sad day.

Weylin walks in, but Caralot's Jaela rushes in after him. They talk briefly, and it is clear they are saying some goodbyes. What's odd to Sakura is that Weylin has never talked to anyone else that she knows of. Sakura gets irritated that Jaela is interrupting her dreamy-watchy time, and feels a little bit of jelousy.

Then, so suddenly that others might not have seen it, C's Jaela gives Weylin a little kiss, and then runs off.

Sakura: :twitch:
rampant

10-12-06, 10:40 AM		Bunny: Nah, what's really cliché is this whole "I wear weights all the time, that makes me really phsycially strong, so I can certainly beat you." Please :P As Terra has shown, cheating is the way to go.


OOC: True, but sometimes cheating involves sneaking up and pulling someone's limbs off. Leaving them to die in a pool of their own gore, gagged with their own lungs.

Bunny - ... I gotta agree there.

OOC: Also how did you get the ` over the e in cliche?
------------------------------------

Satnak - Did we get invited to a costume party?

Serene - No what made you think that?

Satnak - Good because I'm not going to show this much skin in public.

Serene - Of course not, as your wife I'm the only one who gets to see this.

Satnak - Though if we're not going to a costume party, why am I dressed, or more accuratly not, as Felicia?

Serene - Because you have three whole wings worth to work through my pet.

Satnak - :embarrass
Kaizer_Ryu

10-12-06, 10:56 AM		Bunny: Nah, what's really cliché is this whole "I wear weights all the time, that makes me really phsycially strong, so I can certainly beat you." Please :P As Terra has shown, cheating is the way to go.
Terra: I don't cheat. I exploit loopholes. :P :D

OOC: Also how did you get the ` over the e in cliche?OOC: Copy and paste from Word. I'm usually just too lazy to do it myself. :P
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-12-06, 05:37 PM		OOC: Also how did you get the ` over the e in cliche?
OOC: Hold option then press e, then type the letter and it will appear over the letter. At least, that's what works on my keyboard.

Bunny: And what I meant by that is the "Oh, I'm training to be really strong, I can take on any challenge." Strength does not win all battles. And pure strength just really, really boring. I'm a conesseur, give me the finely crafted death sequence.
Norr

10-12-06, 06:26 PM		OOC: Also how did you get the ` over the e in cliche?

On some keyboards (country 'pending) there is a key to the right of the ? key with an ´ and an ` (likely the one you used for your text). hitting that key and then typing 'e' will yield an é.
rampant

10-12-06, 06:58 PM		OOC: Again Bunny is right strength isn't everything. On the reverse its easier to pull off the more creative stuff with a little muscle. Besides, the Island is a concentration of the most ambitious psychics on a war torn world. Its like Card's Battle School, against "normal" (i use this term loosely) people they seem uber, vs. One another not so much.

...

I hate slow weeks.
rampant

10-13-06, 12:12 AM		Satnak - *stretch* Oh bloody mol I haven't slept that well in years.

Serene - I guess it helps if I wear you out a bit first:D

Satnak - mmmmmm..., yes it does

Serene - Its time to pack up though.

Satnak - Awww.

Packing

Satnak - Ooh I still don't know what this one is. Green tanktop, brown shorts and boots, hmmmmm not ringing any bells. (i.h.h. Where is she going to put all these costumes she brought back with her?)

Serene - Ready?

Satnak - Sure but Even with constructs I don't have enough limbs to hold all these.

Serene - Oh, we're going back through Teseris.

Satnak - Lemme check out.

Serene - I'll start moving the stuff through.
Charles Phipps

10-13-06, 01:15 AM		http://img149.imageshack.us/img149/1369/capndookuhp2.jpg

Our first picture of Captain Jarlot Senior!
Kaizer_Ryu

10-13-06, 01:25 AM		:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Count Dooku in a pirate hat is classic in and of itself. Imagining Jarlot Sr. with a light saber is even better. Bravo. :clap:
rampant

10-13-06, 02:04 AM		Terrek (in a bathrobe with fuzzy slippers holding a coffee cup in one hand) - Morning Serene *yawn*

Serene - Morning Daddy!

Satnak - ... Where's the pot?

Terrek - Right around the corner.
--------------------

OOC: I just couldn't resist the mental image.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-13-06, 03:09 AM		OOC: I just couldn't resist the mental image.
OOC: The preceding scene made me think of another image that I find endlessly amusing.

IC:

Rose stands before the coffee pot, dressed in a blue striped bath robe. He squints through the early morning haze as he waits for the pot to start.

Tirmek: How long is he going to stand there before he realizes that it's unplugged?

He continues to squint at the pot.

Sarah: Assuming no one comes in and spoils the fun, it usually takes him about an hour.

It's not entirely certain whether he's alive or not.

Tirmek: Not a morning person I see...wait a minute.

Elina: :rolleyes: Took you long enough.

Ah. A grunt. He's alive.

Tirmek: :mymy: You two unplugged it?!

Sarah: We've been doing this for several weeks, and he still hasn't caught on. :devil:

Ok, now he's either getting frustrated or falling asleep again.

Elina: It never gets old. :D
Lord Kale Fangblade

10-13-06, 08:09 AM		An infinite black surrounds Terra as she waits. Against what appeared to be a featureless landscape, shapes seem to form and fade within the darkness. An overwhelming feel of immense power surrounds this place; though not the raw, deadly power that surrounds most Ubers, something different…indefinable. Terra watched Sa’vor appear with an air of confidence; Sa’vor stopped walking and stood opposite her.

Terra: You’ve changed Sa’vor. In the past you’d have bombarded my defenses with everything you had. Now you merely seep in, as though through a crack.

Sa’vor: Though not with your mind. I found it impossible to enter, so I knocked.

Terra: You could have asked before attempting to get through. I was almost insulted you even tried to sneak in.

Sa’vor: I might have been able to, though you know it’s not my style. I believe you know why I’m here.

Terra: You’ve seen something.

Sa’vor: Yes.

Terra: But you’re not telling what.

Sa’vor: I can’t. I have to follow the rules, if I revealed too much I could damage what is going to happen even more than it is already.

Terra: Good. The future is never immutable, no matter what anyone “prophesizes”.

Sa’vor: *chuckles* How very like you. I can tell you that Something Bad is coming, something bad enough for me to send a seventh son of a seventh son to you. Sithis, My grandson has great potential. But there are bonds on him I cannot break.
What I can tell you is that you will have to make a choice sometime in the future, be ready for that choice.

Terra: And the gift?

Sa’vor: The gift I give you is… *opens the palm of one hand to reveal an acorn*

Terra: An acorn?

Sa’vor: Consider it a metaphor, more than something real it is something spiritual. Some knowledge and insight that I have. It is the seed of hope; hope that you make the right choice.

Sa’vor turns to walk away.

Terra: Before you go…might I inquire as to why you chose not to return?

Sa’vor smiled.

Sa’vor: You want to see my wife? *Terra nods* Then follow me.

Sa’vor raises a hand and there’s a slight rush of energy. They both appear in a manor house; all over the walls are portraits of children. Obviously Sa’vors, Suits of armor are placed here and there. The walls are quite elaborately decorated, every so often there’s a door, most are unlocked and plain wood. Though a few are black and foreboding and sealed with many runes. In the centre two people dance, one is an exact copy of Sa’vor; the other is a girl as tall as him. Her Beauty was almost angelic, though there was a hint of darkness about her. Her skin is Alabaster like Sa’vors and smooth, her black hair is long and strait. Her eyes are a stormy grey, so much so that you’d expect to see flashes of lightning in them. She wore a black and red dress of exquisite design. The two figures danced elegantly with grace and poise beyond mortal grasp. Both of them had their eyes locked intently on the others, as though nothing else mattered.

Terra: I suppose that’s Drusilla?

Sa’vor: Yes, that is indeed her.

Terra: She’s a Daelkyr Half-Blood?

Sa’vor: Of Elvish decent.

Terra: How did she die?

Sa’vor: *sadness etched over his features* She had been slowly weakening over several years. You see, with so much dark magic in both of us it wears down your soul. Since we both had too much soul we would eventually not be able to take the strain. Unfortunately she channeled too much energy one time. She was torn apart.

Terra: Will that happen to any of the crew?

Sa’vor: Probably, though Naz’roth is immune. I believe since Tara and he are bound so closely together she’ll also be immune. Though the In-human members of the crew probably won’t suffer as much, for the others it will be most fatal.

Terra: I can sense you have a plan.

Sa’vor: *his face instantly becomes passive* I do, I still have a fragment of her soul in me. And she has a fragment of mine. I can use this as a channel. If I had enough energy I would be able to bring her back.

Terra: What about you?

Sa’vor: I have a plan for that as well.

Terra: And Sithis?

Sa’vor walks over to a mirror; the reflection in the glass is different from Sa’vor. It looks a lot like him, though the eyes are sea green. His face is older and a lot less feral. His hair is grey and short. Sa’vor mutters a single word under his breath in Elven.

Sa’vor: Aside from what I told you all in the letter? I want you to watch him, keep an eye on him. I sense danger in the future for him. Forces are moving.

Before she can answer, the image of Sa’vor’s mind fades, and she finds herself back in her own.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-13-06, 08:42 AM		Special Report: Where are they now? The story of the FF crew we don't see so much anymore.

Aljihazi:

There is the sound of Aljihazi going all "locokiller", and the sound of kittens yowling. This continues for a few minutes, along with a bumping noise.

Then Aljihazi staggers past, slamming himself against the walls in a effort to dislodge the furious swarming of Rip, Shred, Tear, and Mittens.

Bunny: I guess he found some cute, fuzzy kittens who could dismember as well as him. And the arms race continues. :devil:
Gladius_Lucix

10-13-06, 10:43 AM		Ash, adressing the DTS "Tell Liam I woould be glad of his assiatance, and that if Wirsian devises can be made to augment psionic items I would be honnored to carry one."
The roll of duct tape looks nervous.

The Swarm: Magic is one thing, but Liam hasn't tested Weirsan energy on anything powered by psionics. Since psionics are more closely tied to the wielder's mind than magic, it might do some very bad things to be wielding the distilled insanity of the entire crew. If you're willing to try, though, we may be able to work up some buffers to keep your mind seperate from the Weirsan.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-13-06, 11:33 AM		Ash "I have long learnt to harness my own madness, this will simply be a furtherance of that. I am willing to test the devises if Liam is willing to build them. Indeed if I may ever asist his experaments I would be glad too."
Gladius_Lucix

10-13-06, 12:23 PM		The Swarm: Alright, but be warned: This has Kanatash's insanity in with it. Liam, House Ghallandha, and Morgrave University take no responsibility for adverse side effects. It should be a simple enough modification of a normal Weirsan Reciever, so I'll bring it over later today.
----------
Meanwhile...
Liam: ...tighten that bolt, and done! Alright, Sparky, Illis. Everything should be working, I just need to dial in the collection radius. I'll set it low for the test, then we can turn it up after we see how it's working. Ready?

Illis: Ready.

Sparky: Ready.

Liam flips a pair of tinted saftey goggles down over his eyes and hits the on button.
rampant

10-13-06, 12:52 PM		Shkugafoom

Liam - WTH!

Sparky - Some kid Hacked the system so whenever we turn the unit on it makes that noise. We haven't been able to remove the program, but we were able to counter by programming an automatic drop in the volume.

Illis - Power out put at 40% is up 11%.

Sparky - Ok lets try these setting benchmarks shall we.
-----------------------------------------------

Matron Stonechewer - There you are! I just Finished up with your New room.

Serene - Huh?

Satnak - Grammy what did you do?

Matron Stonechewer - I had one of the unused rooms in your suite renovated Child. I also had the one next to it converted into a nursery.

Satnak - Thanks Grammy!

Serene - Yes Thank you mrs.-

Matron Stonechewer - Call me Grammy child.

Serene - Thank you ...Grammy.

Matron Stonechewer leans down and hugs one in each arm.

Matron StoneChewer - Anything for My dear granddaughter and her mate.
----------------------------------------------

Tirmek - 230 pounds I can't believe he bought it!

Elina - Messing with newbs is fun. :D

Sarah - I think he up and died...Again! :heehee
Charles Phipps

10-13-06, 04:00 PM		OOC: The preceding scene made me think of another image that I find endlessly amusing.

IC:

Rose stands before the coffee pot, dressed in a blue striped bath robe. He squints through the early morning haze as he waits for the pot to start.

Tirmek: How long is he going to stand there before he realizes that it's unplugged?

He continues to squint at the pot.

Sarah: Assuming no one comes in and spoils the fun, it usually takes him about an hour.

It's not entirely certain whether he's alive or not.

Tirmek: Not a morning person I see...wait a minute.

Elina: :rolleyes: Took you long enough.

Ah. A grunt. He's alive.

Tirmek: :mymy: You two unplugged it?!

Sarah: We've been doing this for several weeks, and he still hasn't caught on. :devil:

Ok, now he's either getting frustrated or falling asleep again.

Elina: It never gets old. :D

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-13-06, 05:24 PM		Tirmek: How long is he going to stand there before he realizes that it's unplugged?
OOcat: Since when do we have electric wires? Wait, this is the Forgotten Freedom, why am I asking?

Sign outside Erk's Place:
"Dwarven Drinking Song Night"
Due to last year's outcome, a new rule has been instituted: Patrons are not allowed to compete in the Song Contest if they are in any way immune to the affects of alchohol. Dwarven drinkings songs are just not any fun if they aren't being influence by the beer.
Schedule:
Opening: Singing the national anthem. ("Beer, beer, beer.")
Getting drunk.
Who cares what comes next, you'll be drunk!

Tomorrow Night:
"Come as you favorite costumed hero!"
Regulars are encouraged to come as different costumed heroes from the ones they come as every day.
rampant

10-13-06, 05:53 PM		Matron Stonechewer - (i.h.h. now that they have a nursery they have no excuse not to give me lots of great grand kiddies to spoil)

Silver - I like how she thinks.
------------------------------------

Kithle - How much for a Dr.Fate costume?

Greyfeline - :D
Kaizer_Ryu

10-13-06, 09:23 PM		OOcat: Since when do we have electric wires? Wait, this is the Forgotten Freedom, why am I asking?OOC: Right. On a related note, anyone remember the Computer Lab from way back when? We should do more with that at some point. Can't think of anything at this time. Meh, maybe later.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA :D I'm glad you liked it. They're nowhere near done messing with him. :devil:
rampant

10-13-06, 09:25 PM		Matron Stonechewer - Come along dears.

Serene - Where are we going?

Satnak - She invited us to swing by after the honeymoon. Remember?

Serene - Oh right. (i.h.h. I didn't get a chance to bring her "wardrobe") Lemme get my bag.

Satnak - Won't need it.

Matron Stonechewer - You can wear some of Satnak's old things. These delicate clothes you smallfolk use just aren't up tp snuff.
-----------------------

OOC: I just realized, we haven't acutally done much with darguun, or lahazaar
Kaizer_Ryu

10-13-06, 10:25 PM		OOC: I just realized, we haven't acutally done much with darguun, or lahazaar
Or The Mror Holds, or Droaam, or Q'barra, or the Talenta Plains, or Zilargo, or Argonessen, or Xendric, or Aerenal...

Not to mention something like 10 planes only a few of the crew has been to.

The Forgotten Freedom still has a whole lot of world to destroy. :D
rampant

10-14-06, 12:28 AM		OOC: Yeah lets let sharn rebuild a bit, so there's something worth blowing up next time.
---------------------------------------------

Rose - Ah the pricipalities, now we can recruit some actual Pirates.

------------------------------

Sparking & beeping, Transporting,

Satnak - Ah its good to be back.

A small town (enough for a medium size tribe) is spread out before the group. The houses are made of stone bricks. A large tent-structure behind a large feild dominates the center of town, smaller Tents ring this field. Drawing closer the smaller tents are revealed to be shop stands, while the larger one seems to be some sort of Government office. The houses are ringed around the the tents, and in an even larger ring there is a Solid Stone wall with a single massive wooden door. Two lanes form around this door, one heading out, one in.

Gaurd Troll - Hello Matron, sorry about the hassle but you know the drill.

Matron Stonechewer - You bet your buttons! I helped make the drill! I'd have had your hide for my belts if you didn't.

Gaurd Troll - Aye Maam! Name?
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-14-06, 08:35 AM		Rose - Ah the pricipalities, now we can recruit some actual Pirates.
13: Just don't recruit any who are really into apples. :D
********
Igor approaches Rose in his Igor way.

Igor: Thir?

Rose: GAH!……………Yes, Igor?

Igor: Letter for you, thir. (hands it over)

Rose: :confused: I thought 13 already delivered the mail today.

Igor: Thith wath given to me perthionally. An old mathter of mine wath thure I wath the only one who could be truthted to thee it'th thafe delivery.

Rose opens the letter:
Dear Captain,
I have kidnapped your lovely Zella to use as a vessel for my undead soul to be reborn in a living body, because, let's face it, I'm a lich, I've already gone downhill.
I'd tell you not to try to stop me, but if you're anything like Jarlot that won't do any good.
Errandis d'Vol

PS: If you see Sa'vor, asking him why he never writes or visits.
Lord Kale Fangblade

10-14-06, 09:39 AM		PS: If you see Sa'vor, asking him why he never writes or visits.

Sa'vor: ( in his Mansion scrying on the letter) Damn. she remembered. Well at least she doesnt know where i live... or have enough power to cross dimensional boundries.

Sa'vor feels a rush of fear as he realises somthing.

Sa'vor: they wouldnt....

theres a ringing of a door bell as a familiar voice calls out.

Erandis: Sa'vor! I know your in there! stop hiding from your great grand mother and answer this door!
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-14-06, 11:39 AM		Erandis: Sa'vor! I know your in there! stop hiding from your great grand mother and answer this door!
13: *SNIIIIIIIIIIIFFFFFFF* AH! The smell of ugly old female relative. It brings a tear to one's eye. :weep:
Kaizer_Ryu

10-14-06, 11:57 AM		OOC: :heehee Hilarious LK Fangblade!

IC:

Sarah: So, are you gonna rescue her?

Rose: Obviously.

Elina: :rolleyes: Maybe you can do it right this time.

Rose: :mad: That's no way to talk to your Uncle.

Sarah: :P If the shoe fits.

Rose: Now, I wonder who's gonna come with me...

Elina & Sarah: *jumping wildly* OOOOOOOO! ME! ME! MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME!!!!! :D

Rose: Are you sure? It's going to be dangerous.

Sarah: If she's not here, we can't finish our game!

Elina: Xendric's not going to explore itself.
rampant

10-14-06, 12:05 PM		Sa'vor feels a rush of fear as he realises somthing.

Sa'vor: they wouldnt....

theres a ringing of a door bell as a familiar voice calls out.

Erandis: Sa'vor! I know your in there! stop hiding from your great grand mother and answer this door!

Crew - How long were you on this ship? We'd have sicced her on you whether she mentioned it or not.
--------------------------------------------

Gaurd Troll - Name?

Matron Stonechewer - Grukatha Stonechewer

Satnak - Satnak d'Borisheel ir'Tessier

Serene - Serene d'Borisheel ir'Tessier

Gaurd Troll - Purpose?

Matron Stonechewer - Returning resident, with guests

Satnak - visiting family

Serene - the same

Gaurd Troll - Move along folks.

Serene - I don't get it that wasn't very tight security.

Satnak - Keeping people out isn't the point.

Matron Stonechewer - The point is to give the gaurds and detectors enough time to scan for hostile intent or illegal substances.
----------------------------

At casa de Stonechewer

Matron Stonechewer - You girls will use Satnak's old room. The boys are around here somewhere.

Three trolls leap out from a trap door in the floor of the living room.

A brutal melee ensues as Satnak and the trolls pound bite scratch and choke hold each other for the next ten minutes.

Serene - Satnak!

Matron Stonehewer - Oh don't worry Thats how they always say hello. Theres tea in the kitchen.

Serene - Oh i'd love some thank you. ... Are you sure they'll be alright?

MAtron Stonechewer - They'll be fine. Satnak and her Uncles have been doing this for years.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-14-06, 06:21 PM		Tomorrow Night:
"Come as you favorite costumed hero!"
Regulars are encouraged to come as different costumed heroes from the ones they come as every day.

Ash "Well, thats easy enough, the Human Torch." Strikes a pose and becomes completly wreathed in flames "Flame up!"

( Some new rules, I have no clue where we were last in the list so Im starting with N(ext) )
N : The head of the Sharn Watch's night shift os not Samuel ir'Vimes.
N+1 : Nor is there a humble captain under him who is the rightfull and undenyable heir to the Galifar throne.
N+2 : Minstrum Ridculy is not the Archancelor of Morgrave university.
N+3 : Nor has there ever been a Tourist from Riedra known to visit sharn.
N+4 : Ebberon is not flat Nor is it carryed though space on the back of a gaint turtle.
N+5 : The 12 moons are not World turtle eggs.
N+6 : The reson they are not World turtle eggs is not becase they are infact made of cheeze.
N+7 : 'Kendler did it' is not a valid Excuse, even if they did.
N+8 : I am not a kendler!

OOC: Yes, Im a diskworld fan
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-14-06, 06:46 PM		OOC: Yes, Im a diskworld fan
OOC: Me too. And you spelled Ridcully's first name wrong.
IC:
N+9: Not all dwarves dress as men.
N+10: Nor do both genders have beards.
N+11: It is not possible to kill someone with dwarven baking.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-14-06, 06:54 PM		And you spelled Ridcully's first name wrong.
Gram'mar: :mad: I'M the one who's supposed to do that! My Lord, however, has commanded that the one known as "Eled_the_Worm_Tamer" is to be given leniency. I desire only to see his blood upon my blades, but I cannot disobey.

OOKaizer: Good boy.
Crystalforged

10-14-06, 07:33 PM		OOC: Oy-vey. Sorry about the long abscence but I've been kinda swamped with schoolwork lately and I can't say if its really going to let up anytime soon. Anyway's I figured I should at least send Kanatash on his honeymoon before he decides to wreak bloody vengance...



IC: Back at the reception.

Kithle: Is it just me or does it seem this reception has been going on for weeks?

Terra: Nah, it's only been about an hour. It just seems longer since we've all been caught in a time distortion caused due to the fact that one of the entities has been too busy to get back to us for a while.

Kanatash: (speaking to the collected crowd) Alright folks, Caralot and I are taking off, the rest of can do whatever you want. By the way I expect to see presents waiting for us when we get back since no one brought any to the reception. Seya. (walks through portal with Caralot)

Kithle: Do you think things will be any quieter around here with him gone?

Terra: I doubt it. First there's no shortage of strangeness around here even without those two. Two, the position of most screwed up people on board was just vacated, albiet temporarily. I'd be somebody is going to make a grab for it in their abscence.

---

Somewhere in one of the lower planes a dark and gloomy building stands. An almost palpable aura of malevolence radiates from it. An illegable sign hangs above its door but the glowing red light above that sign makes the "profession" of the occupants clear. A shriek of terror suddenly cuts through the still air as two demons, a Succubus and an Incubus burst through the door, fleeing the house as fast as they possible can. A tentacle darts out the door after them, wrapping around the leg of the incubus.

Succubus: No! Enrike!

Incubus: It's too late Perice, save yourself!

The tentacle jerks and the incubus is dragged from the succubus's arms and back into the building. The succubus turns and flees into a nearby thicket of gnarled trees.

---

Later that day, another an imp passing through the same thicket comes across an image crystal lying in a pile of leaves.

Imp: Wassis thiss? (picks up crystal) Theress a message on thiss there iss. (activates the crystal)

The face of a succubus appears above the crystal. From the angle it appears she must have been holding the crystal in her hands, pointing up at her face when she recorded it. Her face is a mask of terror and panic as tears drip down her face onto the crystal.

Succubus: My name is Perice, I work at the house of ill repute nearby. It began like any other day, a couple had just come in, a honeymoon aparently. The male was transparent like a ghost and there was something, off, about the woman as well but that isn't unusual among our clients. But then... (shudder) The first one's didn't have a chance, and they didn't stop there. We tried to escape but they blocked all the exits. I don't know what happened for sure but I know some of the others didn't survive it and those who did... They just sat there, rocking back and forth, not talking. It was like something in them broke. Enrike and I were the last ones left. We managed to make a break for it but they got Enrike. I'm the last one left.

As she speaks the image shows and incorpereal hand come up from behind her, out of her field of vision, and suddenly wrap around here mouth, muffling here scream. The crystal apparently fell to the ground at this point since the picture goes black but evil chuckle can be heard as well as the sound of a body being dragged through the underbrush.

Imp: :eek: (tosses the crystal over his shoulder) I guessess I'ss not goings there for a whiless. (flaps off in the direction he came from)
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-14-06, 08:03 PM		What really happened:
The next morning.

Caralot: No, seriously, we can't leave without paying. It just wouldn't be right.

Verrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry Out of Breath Succubus/Incubus (OOC: come on, like their aren't some that play both sides ;) ): No *hu* we insist. *wheeze* Best week any*hehhhhhhh* of us ever had. *cough*

Caralot: Sorry if I broke anybody. :embarrass What can I say, my body just took over.

Kanatahs: It didn't hurt that you just installed those retractable tentacles.

Caralot: I was planning that ever since Terra showed off hers.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-14-06, 08:36 PM		Terra suddenly sneezes.

Lisa: You ok?

Terra: I think someone was talking about me...

OOC: LOL to both. I can see an entire series of "Day X: Kanatash's POV", "Day X: Caralot's POV", and "Day X: 3rd party POV" coming out of this. We can then be left to put the pieces together ourselves, thus resulting in mental trauma from the initial impressions as well as that stemming from the complete picture.

I shall now be smited for unleashing a new wave of horror upon us all. :D
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-14-06, 09:51 PM		OOC: LOL to both. I can see an entire series of "Day X: Kanatash's POV", "Day X: Caralot's POV", and "Day X: 3rd party POV" coming out of this. We can then be left to put the pieces together ourselves, thus resulting in mental trauma from the initial impressions as well as that stemming from the complete picture.
OOC: But the question is who should do the 3rd party POV? I figure Crystalforged can do Kanatash (and I assume #1 was Kanatash's), and I do Caralot, but should I also try to do 3rd? I could certainly do a Silver perspective on that one. :devil:
I shall now be smited for unleashing a new wave of horror upon us all. :D
They keep trying to smite me. Doesn't work. Can't figure out why.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-14-06, 10:00 PM		OOC: But the question is who should do the 3rd party POV? I figure Crystalforged can do Kanatash (and I assume #1 was Kanatash's), and I do Caralot, but should I also try to do 3rd? I could certainly do a Silver perspective on that one. :devil:
OOC: Silver's take on events would be most interesting, but I was thinking more along the lines of how Crystalforged showed some of the events through the Succubus's eyes. She thought that her coworkers hadn't survived or were traumatized, when they had in fact had the best night of their lives. :D On that part, I figure it could be anyone. The more the merrier. So long as it causes damage to those not yet assimilated. :devil: :evillaugh
urial angel of death

10-15-06, 12:25 AM		P/Y/R looks around the reception. She sees Sarah and Elina playing with Tirmek, Lady causing general mayhem, and Kerrith trying to avoid his master's wrath.

P/Y/R: :weep:

Volrath: *drinking punch* What's wrong honey?

P/Y/R: I want a baby.

Volrath: :mymy: *spits out punch*
Norr

10-15-06, 06:05 AM		N+11: It is not possible to kill someone with dwarven baking.

N+12: It is, however, possible to kill someone with anthroposoph baking.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-15-06, 09:09 AM		P/Y/R: I want a baby.

Volrath: :mymy: *spits out punch*
Silver: Fertility senses, tingling. :devil:
N+12: It is, however, possible to kill someone with anthroposoph baking.
OOC: ???anthroposoph???
Norr

10-15-06, 09:28 AM		OOC: ???anthroposoph???

Yes, these (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anthroposophy) are known for healthy baking. However, I happen to own one of their whole-grain loaves, which I occasionally use for hammering in nails with. We call it the Dwarven Hunting Loaf, cortesy if Mr. Pratchett. I am 90% sure it can be used to crack a human skull.
rampant

10-15-06, 11:19 AM		Satnak - Nice try but I've learned some new tricks.

Troll 1 - Aaaah tail!

Troll 2 - Not the nose!

Troll 3 - Why am I the one that always ends up getting his lungs stood on?

Satnak - Because to rush too quickly and don't watch your ankles Krog.

Troll 2 (Morsh) - Can you put me down now?

Satnak - *drop*

Morsh and Rark (troll 3) - OUCH!
Chrys

10-15-06, 12:31 PM		P/Y/R looks around the reception. She sees Sarah and Elina playing with Tirmek, Lady causing general mayhem, and Kerrith trying to avoid his master's wrath.

P/Y/R: :weep:

Volrath: *drinking punch* What's wrong honey?

P/Y/R: I want a baby.

Volrath: :mymy: *spits out punch*

OcChrys: I'm so claiming at lest one of the Kids :D I all ready have a great Idea

Volrath: More then One?! :eek:

Bloom: I'm going to be forgoten now... right.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-15-06, 02:12 PM		Bloom: I'm going to be forgoten now... right.

Chanse Random "Its not so bad Miss, you get time to relax... Play poker... wright your memours... And its nice and safe... Aw who am I trying to kid, Ever since that black fethered Zippo lighter showed up its been a long painfull livng death on this ship, someone, please, kill me..." :weep:
rampant

10-15-06, 04:57 PM		Old Dwarf Lady - There there dearies have some soup, here are your sweaters.
Charles Phipps

10-15-06, 05:07 PM		Rose: *sigh*

*opens mail*

Dear Captain Rose,

We here at your sponsors for House Lyrander are unhappy with your progress in taming the crew for your bloodline. While you've removed Admiral Jarlot from control, things have only slightly improved.

Therefore we're holding a CAPTAIN'S BEAUTY PAGEANT where the new Captain will be decided by a variety of questions and poses as decreed by our judges selected from the crew.

-The Twelve

Rose: :twitch:
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-15-06, 05:27 PM		Chanse looks distracted, the saphire he always caries flikering like a hard cold flame. His voice more leasurly and asured he mutters "Did I say 'Long, painfull death?' Fair laidy luck death is but a nother life. I was planning a mutany any way, this is going to be more legal, less fun, but if the only compeition is Spoony? My ship has come in." :rimshot:
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-15-06, 05:56 PM		Chanse Random "…please, kill me..." :weep:
Bunny: Okay.

*BLAM!*

Chanse Random: AAAAHHHHHH!!!! You shot me!

Bunny: Let's not do that joke. (brings in big cartoon cannon) Now hold still.

Chanse Random: :eek: *ZOOOOOOOMMMMMMM!*
*******
Chanse runs up to Rose.

Chanse: Hide me—(spots Bunny)—*zoooooooommmmm*

Rose looks at Bunny.

Bunny: Shhhhhh, be vewy, vewy qwuiet, I'm hunting Wandoms. Hahahahahahahahaha.

Rose watches them go away. Meanwhile 13 and Silver read Rose's letter.

Silver: Do you never read the crews' mail?

13: That would be a violation of postal policy.

Silver: So you prefer to wait and watch their reactions?

13: :D

Silver: It seems the new captain is going to be decided via beauty contest. Think we should judge? ;)

13: Nah, we're going to watch and make biting commentary. :D

Bunny: I thought Rose was going to go off and rescue Zella from the clutches of d'Vol before she completes her weird ritual and takes over Zella's body.

Silver: Maybe Rose has a thing for Errandis.

13: Someone get out the Book of Vile Darkness.

Silver: He's got one thing going for him.

Bunny: You mean besides the fact that Doog is so definitely out of the running?

Doog: That's mean. :weep:

Silver: Jarlot's going to be returning for a bit.

Doog: What? Why? He escaped!

Silver: Marish is having her kittens soon. She wants to make sure all the fathers are around.……………Plus I threatened a very important piece of his anatomy. :D

Bunny: Sometimes the fertility god is much more scary than the death god. :rolleyes:

OOC: All those of you that have characters who are going to be fathers of Marish's kittens, PM me now with a description of the kitten. Only one per customer.
urial angel of death

10-15-06, 07:42 PM		OOC: Kaizer is going to kill me for this. However read the whole thing first so you know why you're killing me.

P/Y/R: *enters wearing a seethrough blouse* Why hello

Volrath: Well actually I was kind of tried and-

P/Y/R: The pants lose them!

Volrath: *nervously* Okay.
--------
Volrath is in the library a look of shock on his face.

Terra: What's wrong?

Volrath: Last night P/Y/R was... the man! :weep:

Terra: Oh... You know what would make you feel better.

Volrath: I'm not in the mood.

Terra: You sure? *runs off and returns in a banana suit.*

what happens next. (http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=5240294477816196908&q=peanutbutter+jelly+time+family+guy&hl=en)
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-15-06, 07:56 PM		13: :blink:…………………:blink:………………KANATASH!

Kanatash: What?!

13: I need an interpreter over here!
********
Bunny: So you have me on speeddial?

OOKaizer: Yes.

Bunny: Good.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-15-06, 07:59 PM		Volrath: Last night P/Y/R was... the man! :weep:
Silver: I fail to see the problem. I mean, was she the man like Caralot?

Volrath: :eek:

OOC: And yet that image is still not disturbing enough.
urial angel of death

10-15-06, 08:02 PM		OOC: It just ment she was in control. She couldn't be like Caralot. She does want a baby after all.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-15-06, 08:11 PM		OOC: It just ment she was in control. She couldn't be like Caralot. She does want a baby after all.
OOcat: Caralot had a baby by another woman. And I bet that if P/Y/R pressured hard enough she could get Volrath to carry the child.

Volrath: DON"T GIVE HIM ANY IDEAS!

OOcat: You know, like a seahorse.

Silver: I know something you don't know! :D And by the way, when is the man ever in control? :confused:
Kaizer_Ryu

10-15-06, 08:16 PM		OOKaizer sits twitching as Sarah and Elina poke at him with sticks.

OOKaizer: :twitch:

Terra: How long has he been like that?

Lisa: Ever since you did your little "cheer up Volrath" dance.

Terra: I don't know what's so bad about it. It didn't work that time, though.

Sarah: I really think you broke him this time.

OOKaizer: :twitch:

Elina: He's just torn between feelings of horrified revulsion and hysterical laughter from that mental image.

Lisa: I thought it was really sweet of you to do that for him.

Terra: During his "bunny meat" funk, it took the combined dancing efforts of myself, Urial, Garr, and Muradin to get him out of it.

Lisa: Was it really that bad?

Terra: He didn't even feel like taking care of his abberations. We had to pick up the slack. With his empathic link to them, they didn't even try to maim us. That worried us more than anything.

OOKaizer: :twitch:

Elina: Try poking him harder.

Sarah: *poke poke* Check it out. He's not even responding. :D

Lisa: Girls, don't taunt the Entity.
rampant

10-15-06, 09:27 PM		Tirmek - I have an Idea, they call it a jump start:D

Sarah - You mean that zappy finger trick?

Tirmek - :D *Zzzzap*

Elina - Whats cooking?

OOKaizer - me
-------------------------------------

Serene - (in a slightly worn horrid rat shirt and deerskin pants) I didn't think I'd ever find something that fit.

Matron Stonechewer - Technically you didn't, those are both a little long on you. Satnak was such a scrawny beanpole till she turned 19.

Serene - Really?

Matron Stonechewer - Yep, strong, but no meat on her bones.

Serene - So she's always been a scrapper?

Matron Stonechewer - Oh yes, why when Levy first brough her by she got into a fight with the chief's son over a pineapple and pulled his nose off! Hahahaha it took all three of my boys to pull her off and she kept waving the poor boy's nose around all day. Hahaha

Serene - Didn't that cause problems whith the chief?

Matron Stonechewer - Not at all, he was more annoyed that his son lost a fight and over one lousy pineapple.

Serene - What's next?

Matron Stonechewer - Easy get that whirlwind in the living room to go get us some meat.

Serene - On it!
----------------------

Satnak is arm wrestling the three trolls (one for each arm and for the tail) she appears to be loosing.

Morsh - ALMOST *STRAIN*

Krog - Finally gonna get you *blood vessel tic*

Rark - huuuurrrrrrg *grit teeth*

Serene - :devil Ooooooh Satnak

Satnak - HUh? *triple slam*

Morsh - OW! my hand.

Krog - I don't like the way my wrist bone is lodged in my elbow, I think I might have to cut the whole arm.

Rark - We've been played! now where did my fingers go?
Charles Phipps

10-16-06, 01:48 AM		Rose: Well, I'm off to go rescue my girlfriend again.

Elina: You're wearing....what exactly?

Rose: Oh, well the green tunic is camoflage. So is the little green Smurf hat.

Elina: What's with the brown panty hose?

Rose: LEGGINGS for protection! They're +5

Elina: And the green elf shoes?

Rose: They're shoes of walk without a trace!

Sarah: Why does your shield have a big cross on it?

Rose: Because it's a magic shield. It can't be eaten by big jelly monsters.

Sarah: That sword is larger than you are.

Rose: It's a MASTER sword.

Sarah: Sango called, she wants her Boomerang back.

Rose: Quiet and hand me my spending money. It's in Rupies. I also need those silver coins melted down into arrows if I'm to defeat Erandis.

Sarah: What's the Flute for?

Rose: When I blow it, it'll carry me off in a whirlwind. It also plays theme music whenever I walk.

Sarah: I don't believe you.

*takes flute in hand and starts walking*

Flute: Boo boo boo boo boooooooo booo boooo BOOO BOOO BOOO....

Elina: I'm stunned.

Rose: And yet as weird as this is. It's not as crazy as this...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g7mw7ewUf0A

Elina: :stare:

Sarah: Okkaayy.

Rose: In any case, we've prepared the Captain for a day Contest.

Elina: I believe whoever wins the beauty pageant is Captain FOR GOOD.

Rose: Well it's too bad you people are too young to participate.

Elina: We're using a time turner to accelerate our emotional and physical maturity to compete.

Rose: Damnit.

Ivy: I think this contest is unfairly prejudiced towards warforged.

Elina: *SQUEE* *hugs her mecha*

Rose: And on that creepy note, I'm leaving.

Elina: What were you going to do for your competition entry?

Rose: Oh, I made a potato soup.

*he points to a gigantic bubbling pot*

Elina: What, is that meat floating in them?

Rose: *pulls out long and thick chopsticks* Hmmmm.

*Picks up a small kitten like catboy covered in potato soup*

Rose: Mmmm catbits.

Elina: EH! MARISH IS STARTING TO HAVE HER KITTENS!

Rose: Oh, well better get the fire heated up then. We also need to get them cleaned if we're going to eat them.

*IS HIT BY ELINA HARD WITH A HAMMER*

Rose: Doog was all fine with the idea!

Sarah: *WHAM*

Schroedigger: This is all very strange this new universe I have arrived in. I'm hungry.

Rose: Yesssss....grow fat my little kittens. Fat and LARGE.

*mouth salivate*

Rose: You shall make an EXCELLENT fur coat for ZELLA!

Shroedigger: Meow?

Sarah: *WHAM*
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-16-06, 08:36 AM		Elina: EH! MARISH IS STARTING TO HAVE HER KITTENS!
Silver: Not yet. God (female) of fertility here, I control when this happens. We need to get Jarlot back on board first.

13: Whose kitten is Schrodigger?

Silver: Beats me. Probably represents the uncertainty reguarding the makeup of the genetics in Marish's kittens. You know, they don't exist until we observe them existing.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-16-06, 10:47 AM		OOKaizer: So...what happens if one of you wins and you become Captain?

Elina: We return to normal and become the cutest Captain this ship has known since the Ninja Jaela! :D

OOKaizer: What about school? You are not getting off the hook with that.

Sarah: :rolleyes: Like being Captain involves doing any real work around here. Uncle Spoony does it, how hard can it be?

OOKaizer: ...good point.

OOC: Charles, I actually have the short version of that clip. Don't remember where I found it, but it was too funny to get rid of.

It just goes to show you: The Japanese are crazy. :D
Chrys

10-16-06, 10:55 AM		Ok, I have an Ok idea Idea for one of Volraths & P/Y/R's kids [I'm think they will have a ton of kids, I mean P/Y/R is basicly a half Fiend Nymph ;) ]

The only problem is I can't think of a name... Right now I'm think of name her [and at lest two others] after the Valkeries form the Valkyrie Profile game :( :embarrass
rampant

10-16-06, 11:15 AM		A flying city of lunatics and their spawn. I gotta take some art classes. I can't think of a better premise for a webcomic.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-16-06, 11:39 AM		The Forgotten Freedom web comic...dear lord, that's brilliant! What better way to spread this beautiful madness than through the wonderful medium of digital comics? Of course, we'd all get a portion of the profits ;) .
rampant

10-16-06, 11:56 AM		I don't know Kind of hard to get money from an audience who's mostly too traumatized to move.
Chrys

10-16-06, 12:42 PM		Yeah Webcomics don't really make prophets [:P ]

I used to have a sprite comic [that suck more ass then any thing else on the web] but I can't draw any thing:weep:
rampant

10-16-06, 12:52 PM		Satnak - (i.h.h. my uber-hot wife is wearing my old clothes, all non-essentials shutting down)

Serene - She's cute when she's too horny to think:D

Rark - (i.h.h. neice's wife no touchie)

Krog - (i.h.h. is it worth dying?)

Morsh - (i.h.h. my wife will kill me, my wife will kill me, assuming my neice doesn't get me first)

Matron Stonechewer - Ok you lot stop ogling the girl and get us some dinner.

The trolls scramble out.

Serene - You to silly girl:)

Satnak - Oh right!
--------------------------------------

The prey species of the area tremble in fear, as the familiar dread of the hunter rises again.

Satnak (in totemist melds) - Geuss whose back.

Prey species - The destroyer has returned!!

Other predators - Run for your lives!
urial angel of death

10-16-06, 01:15 PM		OOC: The valkyries names are Lenneth (main char of first one) , Hrist (“evil” one), and Silmeria ( the main char of the prequel ).
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-16-06, 02:59 PM		OOC: I have two kittens in. I have one more that was preconfirmed before this time that still needs a description. Charles Phipps need not submit a description, I'll do Jarlot's. :devil:
IC:
Terra and Lisa are sitting with Marish and Cuddles as they wait for Silver to get the contractions started.

Terra: Contractions by appointment. That would have been nice to know. :mad:

OOKaizer: :D

Silver (from another room): Still waiting on the fathers!

Marish: How many?

Silver: Only three confirmed so far. And here's lucky No. 2!

Ash gets booted into the room.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-16-06, 04:40 PM		N+13: If it appears in Strange and amusing things you've done for your players (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=721847)………


…………you are certainly allowed to do it.
Charles Phipps

10-16-06, 04:52 PM		OOC: You know, what surprises me most about this thread is the sheer multi-faceted nature of many of the characters. Kanatash the psychotic evil master of madness has a romance plot, Lisa and Terra had their complex courtship with Michael/Kronzen etc interference...

And Rose has Link, Spoony Bardness, The Princess Bride, and a weird Cruella Deville devotion to getting Marish's kittens without ever breaking character.

That baffles me.
urial angel of death

10-16-06, 06:21 PM		OOC: Please don't involve the ubers in this story yet, and try to limit the adults.

Kerrith, Ivy, Sarah, Lilly, and Tirmek are wandering the lowwer decks.

Sarah: Lilly and I had wanted to be alone. Why are all you people here?

Kerrith: As your choice of campanions drops ever lowwer, I could not allow you are any female to be allowed alone with a human.

Tirmek: While I don't like how he put it I don't really like the prospect of you and Lilly be alone together either.

Ivy: Sorry big brother. I just had to get alchemy components, and I'm afraid of the dark.

*Long pause*

Tirmek: Have any of you noticed how few redshirts have been running around.

Sarah: Uncle Volrath's aberrations feed around this time of month.

Tirmek: That can't be it. They've all just been sitting around ever since P/Y/R started keeping him in their room.

Sarah: Well knowing the entities this sort of thing will reveal itself right about now.

*long pause*

Sarah: *looks up* Oh very funny. :mad:

The group rounds a corner to the sight of the largest redshirt they have ever seen lying in a pool of his own blood and missing most of his skin. Over him kneels a spiky haired young boy holding a long serrated knife. He looks up to face them revealing that his eyes are nothing but white and his teeth are all sharpened into grizzly spikes.

Sarah: Well that was less then uplifting.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-16-06, 06:43 PM		The group rounds a corner to the sight of the largest redshirt they have ever seen lying in a pool of his own blood and missing most of his skin. Over him kneels a spiky haired young boy holding a long serrated knife. He looks up to face them revealing that his eyes are nothing but white and his teeth are all sharpened into grizzly spikes.
Bunny: Booooooorinnnnnnnnnnnng. :bored:
urial angel of death

10-16-06, 07:01 PM		Bunny: Booooooorinnnnnnnnnnnng. :bored:

Silver: This coming from the entity that said StarShip Troopers was the best sci-fi movie ever.
rampant

10-16-06, 07:21 PM		OORampant - Oh gods they mangled my favorite book! I hate them all!! Wheres my superscope?
Charles Phipps

10-16-06, 07:26 PM		Silver: This coming from the entity that said StarShip Troopers was the best sci-fi movie ever.

A Triumph of the Will says Roger Ebert!

;-)
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-16-06, 07:42 PM		Silver: This coming from the entity that said StarShip Troopers was the best sci-fi movie ever.
Bunny: I did not. :mad: Sure, people get killed in that movie, but no one really dies. :rolleyes: You see, there's a conesseurial difference between random violent deaths at the hands of large bug monsters or phsychos who strip the skin off their victims and—

Silver: So you don't like Starship Troopers?

Bunny: I didn't say that. It's just not the best sci-fi movie ever.

Silver: So what is?

Bunny: 2001.

Silver: :confused: Seriously?

Bunny: You subject people to long drawn-out sequences of basically nothing and then all you have to do is call the morgue. :evillaugh

Silver: Well, it has to be true. :rolleyes: It's so Bunny.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-16-06, 08:00 PM		( OOC: Are you kidding it has to be... hmm, the Matrix is more a Martal arts movie, ditto Equilibrium... the Dune movie was awfull... Has to be Mad Max: Beyond thunder dome. atmosphere, tension, and the odd savage wonder of the world rising from the ashes. )
rampant

10-16-06, 09:02 PM		Matron Stonechewer - Would you like to meet your new cousins?

Serene - They have kids?

Matron Stonechewer - Just the two youngest, poor Krog, his sweetie is one of those War-Trolls, the lass isn't interested in having little troll cubs until she makes Captain or some such nonsense.

Serene - I'd love to meet them.

Matron Stonechewer - Lets go we'll invite them over for dinner while we're out.
-----------------------------------

Tirmek - *call spiked chain**call incarnate weapon* Who are you and what is your purpose spikey.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-16-06, 09:33 PM		Yeah Webcomics don't really make prophets [:P ]
I was thinking more along the lines of how Devon was used. We make people pay us so that we don't advertise, or post links anywere, or distribute it in any way other than the site. As for those who actually read it, they would be so traumatized that they could easily be persuaded into giving us money. :D I know most comics are monetary black holes, but this thread is gold.
urial angel of death

10-16-06, 10:11 PM		spikyhair: Master are they chosen too.

a baleful voice fills everyone's minds.

voice: Only the mechanical one. He defies death, and cheapens the value of souls.

Lilly: 10 exp. How can that be cheapened.

voice: Oh yes and you can kill the 4th wall breaker as well.

The voice's presence leaves their minds.

spikyhair: Let me introduce myself I am Izzy current flusher. The gods have judged you unworthy of life.

Izzy rushes toward Ivy with dagger drawn. Just as he reaches Ivy, Sarah grabs his arm, twists it 180 degrees, and throws Izzy onto his head. The neck gives way with a cracking sound and a gurgle. The boy then goes still.

Sarah: Well that was rather anti-climactic. Where to ne- *notices the dagger protuding from her shoulder* When did that get there.

Sarah falls over to reveal Izzy standing behind her.

Kerrith: Didn't she kill you? :eek:

Izzy: Short answer yes with a but, long answer no with a because.

Tirmek: You bastard! Devouring darkness

A blast of eldritich energy shots from Tirmek and consumes Izzy. Unfortunately it also grabs the nearby Kerrith and Lilly.

---------

Kerrith awakens next to Lilly in an odd stone structure that has no window, but many hallways leading off it.

Kerrith: (i.h.h.) Good still clothed means the human didn't wake up first.

OOC: More tomorrow I'm tired.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-16-06, 10:51 PM		Sarah: OW! WTF!!

Ivy: You ok?

Sarah: I have DR and SR up the wazoo, resistance to most elemental attacks, and immunity to both poison and disease. There's a reason the Wanted posters say my sister and I are overpowered.

Tirmek: So...why'd you fall over?

Sarah: Plot Device, apparently. But you were so cute, getting all protective. ;)

Tirmek: *anime sweatdrop*

*****

Silver: :plotting: :evillaugh :schemes:

OOKaizer: :tantrum: NINE!!!

*****

Ivy: Where did my brother, the psycho, and Izzy go?

Sarah: No idea. But nice low blow. :D

Tirmek: Indeed. :D

OOC: I looked, but I can't seem to find Devouring Darkness...so I have no idea what it does.
rampant

10-17-06, 12:23 AM		Sarah: Plot Device, apparently. But you were so cute, getting all protective. ;)

Tirmek: *anime sweatdrop*

*****

Silver: :plotting: :evillaugh :schemes:

OOKaizer: :tantrum: NINE!!!


OORampant - :tantrum: EIGHT!! Also what the :censored: is Devouring Darkness? Tirmek is a psycarnum initiator, no spells! Sapphire Nightmare strike yes - Lightning bolt no!
cypher_zero

10-17-06, 12:39 AM		OOCypher: :tantrum: ONE THOUSAND ONE HUNDRED AND FOURTY TWO!

Terrek: What does my age have to do with anything?

OOCypher: :tantrum: I DON'T KNOW BUT EVERYONE ELSE WAS DOING IT SO I HAD TO!

Terrek: ... If everyone else was jumping off a bridge, would you?

OOCypher: ... :shifty: yes.

Terrek: ... :nonono:
.
Charles Phipps

10-17-06, 02:36 AM		OOC: Well if you're out of jokes and need inspiration, why NOT just steal from the best wholesale?

ROSE GALAN AND THE QUEST TO RESCUE PRINCESS ZELLA!

Guard: Who goes there?

Rose: It is I, Rose Galan, son of Simon Galen, from the Eldeen Reaches. Grand Bard of the Realm, rescuer of Princesses, and Captain of the Forgotten Freedom!

Guard: Whose the other one!?

Rose: This is my trusty servant Igor. We have ridden the length and breadth of the land in search of knights who will join me in my quest to rescue the Fair Princess Zella. I must speak with your lord and master.

Guard: What? Ridden on a horse?

Rose: Yes!

Guard: You're using coconuts!

Rose: What?

Guard: You've got two empty halves of coconut and you're bangin' 'em together.

Rose: So? We have ridden since the snows of winter covered this land, through the kingdom of Aundair, through...

Guard: Where'd you get the coconuts?

Rose: We found them.

Guard: Found them? In Aundair? The coconut's tropical!

Rose: What do you mean?

Guard: Well, this is a temperate zone

Rose: The swallow may fly south with the sun or the house martin or the plover may seek warmer climes in winter, yet these are not strangers to our land?

Guard: Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?

Rose: Not at all. They could be carried.

Guard: What? A swallow carrying a coconut?

Rose: It could grip it by the husk!

Guard: It's not a question of where he grips it! It's a simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not carry a one pound coconut.

Rose: Well, it doesn't matter. Will you go and tell your master that Captain Rose from the Forgotten Freedom is here?

Guard: Listen. In order to maintain air-speed velocity, a swallow needs to beat its wings forty-three times every second, right?

Rose: Please!

Guard: Am I right?

***

Later

Rose: Old woman....

V: Man.

Rose: Man, sorry. What knight lives in that castle over there?

V: I'm 27.

Rose: What?

V: I'm 27. I'm not old.

Rose: Well I can't just call you "man".

V: Well you could say "V".

Rose: I didn't know you were called V.

V: Well you didn't bother to find out did you?

Rose: I did say sorry about the "old woman", but from behind you looked...

V: What I object to is you automatically treat me like an inferior.

Rose: Well I am Captain.

V: Oh, king eh? Very nice. And how'd you get that, eh? By exploiting the workers. By hanging on to outdated imperialist dogma which perpetuates the economic and social differences in our society.

Rose: I say, didn't you used to be part of my crew?

V: *ahem* No I wasn't.

Rose: Yes you were. You were revealed to be Ketler in disguise too!

V: Ridiculous.

Rose: *removes his mask* Look at you! Right there, you're Ketler!

Ketler: Oh fine! That still doesn't give you the authority to boss me around!

Rose I am your Captain.

Andrea: Well I didn't vote for you.

Rose: What the hell are you doing here!?

Andrea: Ketler lost all of our pirating money playing bones. We've been forced to become serfs.

Rose: UGH! You should be on the Forgotten Freedom stealing!

Ketler: We never do any pirating! Besides, you're not the Captain. We didn't have an election!

Rose: You don't vote for captains.

Ketler: Well how'd you become captain then?

[Angelic music plays... ]

Rose: The Goddess Arrawai, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite held aloft the magical harp from the bosom of the sky, signifying by divine providence that I, Rose, was to carry the Harp of the Final Fantasy. THAT is why I am your Captain!

Ketler: Listen, strange women lyin' in clouds distributin' mandolins is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical windy ceremony.

Rose: How much have you earned as serfs?

Ketler: 82 copper.

*Rose pulls out crossbow*

Rose: Give it up.

***

[i]LATER STILLLLllll....

Rose: This quest is getting ridiculous Igor. I mean, we've been to Lhazaar twice already.

Igor: Masssper, maybeee you shouldn't keep going in circles.

Rose: It has nothing to do with harems. That's all I'm saying.

Igor: Lhazaar is known for a lot more zan harams.

Rose: Yes, in NOOoooo way am I staying that country for its harems.

Igor: Dazts good.

Rose: Nor the regular bathing, the spicy but delicious food, the advanced
civilization, the cool robes we all get to wear, or the fact I can call myself Rose of Arabia.

Igor: Of curse.

Rose: In fact, I left my watch in Lhazaar. Let's go back. We just have to cross this bridge.

Black Knight: NONE SHALL PASS.

Rose: Oh for Pete sake.

Black Knight: NONE SHALL PASS.

Rose: Listen, we all know this skit ends with you losing your arms and legs. Its
not funny written.

Michael: *pops open visor* Do you think I WANT to be the Black Knight for this skit? Do you think I LIKE the idea of having both my legs and arms chopped off?

Rose: Will you let me pass?

Michael: No, Lisa told me not too.

Igor: *whipped noises*

Rose: She's not even sleeping with you anymore.

Michael: NONE SHALL PASS!

*Michael hefts a HUGE sword up*

*Rose shoots him in the chest with a crossbow*

Michael: Damnit, no fair ripping off Raiders of the Lost Ark! *collapses*

***

Much MUCH MUCH later

In the Tower of Chaos

Narrator: And as the Black Beast lurched forward, escape for Arthur and his knights seemed hopeless, when suddenly, the animator suffered a fatal heart attack!

Rose: Oh Thank god!

*is surrounded by corpses, slain monsters, and his shirt is torn in numerous places while his hand is replaced by a chainsaw*

Ash: GIVE ME THAT BACK!

*the chainsaw is pulled off Rose's arm to reveal his hand is perfectly fine*

Rose: At last, I am free to rescue Zella from all the evils here and live happily ever after with her.

*A beautiful Aerenal Elven maiden in scanty attire walks up to him*

Rose: ZELLA!

b]Dingo[/b]: No, I am Zella's identical twin sister, Dingo.

Rose: What?

Dingo: I'm sorry Rose, but your Princess is in another Castle.

Rose: Bull****!

Dingo: Yes, I'm afraid this is only the first of EIGHT castles where you'll have to go to each progressively harder one only to find another maiden at the end that's not in fact Zella when wisdom would dictate the nastiest and most difficult of the castles is where she would be.

Rose: Why don't I go there first?

Dingo: It's tradition.

Rose: No, wait, she HAS to be here! I seek the Princess! I have seen here, here in this castle!

Dingo: No, oh no! Bad, bad Zella!

Rose: What is it?

Dingo: She has been setting a light to our beacon, which, I've just remembered, is Princess shaped. It's not the first time we've had this problem.

Rose: She's really not here?

Dingo: Oh, wicked, bad, naught evil Zellat! Oh, she is a bad person, and she must pay the penalty! You must spank her well, and after you are done with her, you may deal with her as you like... and then... spank me.

Various Fantasy RPG Girls held in this castle: YES AND ME!

Dingo: And then the oral sex.

Rose: Huh.....well I suppose I could rest a bit. Save my game and all that...

Jarlot: I must rescue you from this peril!

Rose: OH HELL NO!
Kaizer_Ryu

10-17-06, 03:17 AM		LOL to both Charles and cypher. :D

Now I'm off to bed, which I should have done an hour ago. Meh. I don't really need to be awake for my job. It's not like I deal with sharp things and heavy objec- Oh, wait. I do.

Good thing I've bought all these Phoenix Downs and Hi-Potions yesterday, or I might be in trouble.

*looks in bag*

Note: I.O.U., OORei :P

Well...crap.
urial angel of death

10-17-06, 07:24 AM		OOC: The devouring darkness was like a limit break type deal. He got emotional enough that the grandmaster DM allowed him to. Unfortunately he didn't realize that the DM took away all of his action points for it. As for Sarah being downed, well let's just say Izzy is more than he appears. I'll get to work on the rest soon.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-17-06, 08:27 AM		Silver: :plotting: :evillaugh :schemes:

OOKaizer: :tantrum: NINE!!!
Silver: Chill. :cool: I'm just getting a head start. Besides, according to their own genetics their not even fertile yet. :P

*knock, knock*

Silver: Ooooooo, another father's here.

Silver opens the door.

Silver (heard from Marish's room): Now don't be shy. If you're going to do the deed you shoud take the consequences. *boot*

Terrek stumbles into the room.
Chrys

10-17-06, 09:45 AM		OOC: The valkyries names are Lenneth (main char of first one) , Hrist (“evil” one), and Silmeria ( the main char of the prequel ).

Yeah I know ;) , I just can't think of any better names right now...

I was looking in another thread and found this
P/Y/R (http://img264.imageshack.us/img264/9877/trixiegnomepixieco2.png) :D

The Future

???? : Are you sure this is a good Idea?

????: Shut up ‘Len’, Dad made you the assistant librarian that means we can look at what ever book we want!

Len: But ‘Sil’ these books have minds of there own…

Sil: No Buts… Unless you want that stupid Drow to keep hitting on us!

Len: No… But what If Hrist finds out!

Sil: Look if we hurry up Hrist will not find out!

Hrist: I won’t find out what Silmeria? Lenneth why don’t you tell your older sister what you doing in the Forbidden reading room?

Len: We were just looking for a book…

Sil: Shut up Hrist… you are only older by all of five seconds!

Hrist: I’m still older; and any way Both Dad and Mom said that we can’t use any magic from this room…after we turned That Vampire King guy in to a sock puppet with a sick number fetish… and that time when turned the Demon waste in to The Happy Fun Time Flower Meadow!

Sil: Hey they both liked it when we turned Sharn in to a Giant Water Theme Park!

Len: Come on Stop fighting… I Think I found the book! See Right here the … The Great Big Book a Temporal Fun…

To be continued…
rampant

10-17-06, 11:42 AM		Tirmek - *control sound* Ok no one should be able to hear us outside this circle (scrathes an "o" out in the ground)

Ivy - What are you doing?

Tirmek - Giving us a chance to plan.

Sarah - Find spikey, hurt spikey, rescue losers, there's the plan.

Tirmek - Not quite, I'd like to make an addition to "hurt spikey".

Ivy - Huh?

Tirmek - IT seems death is an inefective solution for now.

Bunny - Awwwww:weep:

Sarah - So you want to try to disable him somehow?

Tirmek - Nothing that fancy one of us just need to keep beating on him even after he's down. Once we find Lilly, we can tie up spikey and take him topside and make him someone else's problem.

Sarah - What about Kerrith?

Tirmek - What about him?

Ivy - Who cares?
-----------------------------

Kerrith - *achoo**achoo* I feel strangely unloved.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-17-06, 02:54 PM		P/Y/R (http://img264.imageshack.us/img264/9877/trixiegnomepixieco2.png) :D
OOC: I actually have the book that's in. It's called [u]Bastards & Bloodlines[u] and its a book on various creatures that would result from hybrids between humanoids and other creatures of D&D. Inspiration for Caralot. :devil:
Lord Kale Fangblade

10-17-06, 03:19 PM		Sithis fades into existance within the circle.

Sithis: I'd like to help.

Tirmek: Oh? and how exactly can you help?

Sithis: Bait. I can soften spiky up a bit before you attack.

Sarah: no offence new guy but you got sent here for training. this guys pretty tough, you'd just get shredded.

Sithis: what ever spiky does, he cant kill me peremently. even if he turned me to dust and spread it about on the four winds i'd come back eventualy.

OOC: over to you rampant.
rampant

10-17-06, 04:20 PM		Tirmek - Keep an eye on Ivy, He seems to be Spiky's primary target. Sarah I need you on point, you've got the best stealth and don't seem to be on his list. We'll follow at 20 paces, I'll take rear. Anything else? no? Move out.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-17-06, 05:02 PM		Marish: So what's the hold-up?

Silver: Apparently OOcat is watching episodes of The Legend of Zelda show. I'll go check on him.
*******
13: This is so 80s.

Bunny: And that sword, is that supposed to be a longsword or a shortsword.

Silver: Hey, what's taking so long? (Watches.) Wow, that's Link. He's a jerk—

OOcat: :eek: Shutupshutupshutupshut—(watches for a few seconds) :blink:…………Hmm, yeah, very jerky. :bored:

13: 80s jerk style.

Bunny: So very Rose.

OOcat: No, no, I like Rose better.

Silver: I don't see what Link likes about Zelda so much. Now that Sprite, she's hot.

13: That begs a question, shouldn't Rose have an annoying fairy sidekick?

OOcat: Did it in two games. It's canon enough.

Rose: Don't you mean it's Ganon enou—

*ZAP, SMASH, WHAM!*

OOcat: Thanks. Even I'm not that stupid.

Inevitable of Bad Puns: No problem.
rampant

10-17-06, 05:15 PM		OORampant - EEEEEEEEEE!!!!! YAY!

13 - Watch out No one make a captain N reference! He'll turne this into one big Capatain SNES ripoff.... Wait a minute that sounds fun hey OORamp-oof

Palom - I'm not going through that again!

Porom - No way am I spending another minute in Gato.

Palom - They'd probably stuff us in Stupid, whose what a third gato's size?
urial angel of death

10-17-06, 05:28 PM		Sorry for taking so long on the next part. It's just a long sequence that is kind of hard to transfer onto paper.
rampant

10-17-06, 05:33 PM		Paper? Huh?

13 - What he said.
urial angel of death

10-17-06, 06:13 PM		OOC: I write stuff down first.
Charles Phipps

10-17-06, 08:20 PM		Good bit with the 80s Zelda cartoon.

"EXCUUSEEEE ME!"
urial angel of death

10-17-06, 10:16 PM		OOC: I've finally finished the fight scene, but I need to go to bed. I'll post it in the morning.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-17-06, 11:18 PM		While Sarah is busy with Spikey, and Rose is busy saving Zella (kind of), Elina (feeling unloved) is playing a D&D game headed by her Uncle Volrath (P/Y/R is allowing him a temporary reprieve...but not too long ;) ).

Elina, Volrath, and Ketler sit around a table with the normal assortment of D&D paraphernalia. Michael is rummaging though the mini-kitchen in the adjoining room.

Volrath: Galstaff - You have entered the door to the north. You are now by yourself, standing in a dark room. The pungent stench of mildew eminates from the wet dungeon walls.

Michael: Where are the Cheetos?!!

Volrath: They're right next to you...

Ketler: I cast a spell!

Michael: Where's the Mountain Dew?!!

Volrath: In the fridge! Duh!

Ketler: *slightly whiny* I wanna cast a spell!

Michael: Can I have a Mountain Dew?!

Volrath: *annoyed* YES! You can have a Mountain Dew, just go get it...

Ketler: I can cast any of these, right? On the list?

Volrath: Yes, any...any of the 1st level ones.

Michael: I'm gonna get a soda, anyone want one?! Hey Volrath! I'm not in the room, right?!

Volrath: What room?!

Ketler: I wanna cast...Magic Missle.

Michael: The room where he's casting all these spells from!

Volrath: He hasn't cast anything yet!

Ketler: I am though, if you'd listen. I'm casting Magic Missle!

Volrath: :confused: Why are you casting Magic Missle? There's nothing to attack here...

Ketler: I...I'm attacking the darkness!

*uprorious laughter*

Volrath: *chuckling* Fine...fine. You attack the darkness. There's an Elf in front of you.

Ketler: :eek: Whoa!

Elina: That's me, right?

Volrath: She's wearing a brown tunic, and she has pink hair, and blue eyes.

Elina: No, I don't. I have yellow eyes.

Volrath: Lemme see that sheet...

Elina: Well it says I have...*hands it over* Well it says I have blue but I decided I wanted yellow eyes.

Volrath: Whatever! You guys can talk to each other now, if you want.

Ketler: ...hello.

Elina: Hello.

Ketler: I am Galstaff, Sorcerer of Light!

Elina: Then how come you had to cast Magic Missle?

*more uprorious laughter*

Volrath: You guys are being attacked!

Michael: Do I see that happening?!

Volrath: No! You're outside, by the Tavern!

Michael: Cool, I get drunk!

Volrath: *sigh* There are seven Ogres surrounding you.

Elina: How could they surround us? I had Mordenkeinan's Magical Watchdog cast...

Volrath: No you didn't...

Michael: I'm getting drunk! Are there any girls there?!

Elina: I totally did! You asked me if I wanted any equipment before this adventure and I said no. But I need material components for all my spells, so I cast Mordenkeinan's Faithful Watchdog!

Volrath: But you never actually cast it.

Michael: Roll the dice to see if I'm getting drunk!

Volrath: *sigh* *rolls* Yeah, you are!

Michael: Are there any girls there?!

Volrath: *annoyed* Yeah!

Elina: I did though! I completely said when you asked me-!

Volrath: No you didn't! You didn't actually say that you were casting the spell, so now there's Ogres, ok?!

Michael: Ogres?! Man, I got an Ogre Slaying Knife! It's got a +9 against Ogres!

Volrath: You're not there! You're getting drunk!

Michael: Ok, but if there's any girls there, I wanna do them!

OOC: Thanks to the Dead Alewives for this wonderous skit. :D
rampant

10-18-06, 02:43 AM		Krog - Jeeze kid, cut us a break!

Morsh - Your making us look bad!

Rark - Stop whining, and help me with this end!

Satnak is hefting the front end of a Dire Mammoth, Rark, and now his brothers are struggling with the back half.

Satnak - Good thing Grammy is planning on inviting the wives and sprats.

Morsh - How did you know?

Satnak - I know my Grandma, She loves an excuse to have family get togthers.

Rark - Thats Mom.
urial angel of death

10-18-06, 07:31 AM		OOC: The second one would involve Ketler getting a girlfriend :eek:

Damn for linear moving time! No time to post more than this till afternoon. :(
Chrys

10-18-06, 11:05 AM		OoChrys: I may or may not created Bloom to be Ketler master… I mean she is a Robot girl after all.

Bloom: :eek: :noway: :help: :mymy: I’m glad I’m going to be forgotten now.

Back to the Future…

Just as Len starts to pull the book Hrist slams it back in to the self

Hrist: No! We are not messing with the time stream… When ever we mess with any thing in this room some thing bad happens; we probably end up back in time and killing our grandparents!

Len: Why do you to kill our Grandmas?

Sil: Really, I’d tell Grandma Beryl to stay way from the Khyber shard laced bean dip!

Hrist: No that would be even worse! You see any action we would take in the past changes the Now!

Sil: Duh! That’s what we are trying to do! We are going go back in time and kill that Damn Drow before he get to powerful! That way he will stop hitting on us!

Len: Or at lest make it so he can tell up apart… I don’t really like killing people.


[I]To be continued…
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-18-06, 11:55 AM		Chanse, wrapped in soulmelds from his silvery half mask, to blue winged sandals. Stands before a croud of redshirts amid the lower deck, pacing with the athoraty of an orating tiger as he speaks.
"My frends, my neglected brothers, for too long have you been denyed your due, victims of the predation of others, langushing aboard a vessel more ship of fools than Ship of the line. Denyed the pirates right of loot and pillage. I come before you to change all that, I come to give you imortality, to lead you to grory and give you the names that will free you from the destany of your uniforms.

The Aundar ship 'The golden dancer' is taking a cargo of war repartations to Kranath, more than we could all spend in a year. She is lightly guarded, relyant upon her captain's skill for her defence, but-" explodes into moton drawing his heavy crossbow and firing twice at at target at the other end of the hall, bolts shuddring to a hault in the targets panted eyes, all in a hert beat "There is no defence aginst my aim. That you survive here at all marks you as skilled, tis ship, can be ours. If you agree to serve me"

Chorus of afirmation, loud cheering and thunderos staming on the deck below.

"You, the warforged at the back? how were you known?"

The warforged, clad in finest fassions over his silver plating, and wering a plumed 3 cornered hat "Ver d'Gris, finest swordsman in aundar" draws and florishes with a pair of fencing sabers.

Chanse "Exelent, organise your boarding party, twenty men, no more. Yuo sir, the shifter with the snaggle tooth?"

Shifter "Jack o'Bite, the Bloody Jawed bushwhaker of the Kranathi woods."

Chanse "Ceaze the helm and the weapons, as many men as you need. We move within the hour, we strike tmorow, before dawn, when the mist will mask our aproach."
To be, continued...
rampant

10-18-06, 01:59 PM		Redshirt 666 - I wonder how mistress Beryl is gonna react?

Redshirt 13 - Can't sleep squirrels will eat me.
Gladius_Lucix

10-18-06, 02:29 PM		Liam checks the power output on the Weirsan converter.

Liam: Looks good. Everything's stable. I'm ready to start on the next one.

Illis: How can something like this be stable?

Liam: Har har. If you don't want any more, I can leave now, and let you figure out how to fix things yourself if things go wrong.

Illis: Jeeze. Sorry. The next one's over here.
Norr

10-18-06, 05:12 PM		As the redshirts march out, one of them is in a heated discussion. With himself.
Halfling redshirt (in his head): Mutiny... this is bad, Rose is gonna go spare.
Hr (i.h.h.): On the other hand, Rose is a lousy captain (emphasis on the small c), I doubt he'd keelhaul the lot of us if this failed.
Hr (i.h.h.): Oh, he would. In four flavours.
Hr (i.h.h.): Yah, but I'm stealthy... wait, four? Isn't it more like... three?
Hr (i.h.h.): With the Keels' berating it's four, makes me feel so guilty :weep:. Besides, He'll get the Ubers to sniff everyone out.
Hr (i.h.h.): Anyway, lets say this all works, who will be the new cap'n?
Hr (i.h.h.): Prolly the incarnish Chanse fellow.
Hr (i.h.h.): Would he be any better? For all I know, he might keelhaul the lot of us anyway, just for the hell of it. And get ketler to make a new one.
Hr (i.h.h.): New what?
Hr (i.h.h.): Flavour.
Hr (i.h.h.): :confused:
Hr (i.h.h.): keelhauling.
Hr (i.h.h.): :D That'd be awesome.
Hr (i.h.h.): Totally.
Hr (i.h.h.): Anyway, aid in or rat out?
Hr (i.h.h.): I like the third option.
Hr (i.h.h.): :confused:
Hr (i.h.h.): Keep back, keep quiet, loot the corpses.
Hr (i.h.h.): Ooh, I like that. It's settled.
Hr (i.h.h.): So... what now?
Hr (i.h.h.): I'm hungry. Let's have nuts.

The redshirt lags behind the troop and slips into a side corridor. After a short while, he finds a lone redshirt on his way to the helm. The redshirt spins around as the halfling approaches, but relaxes slightly when he sees the small frame. Newbie.

Human redshirt: Wassup shorts, anything I can 'help' you with? :tie:
Halfling redshirt: I want your nuts. :D
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-18-06, 07:29 PM		Soon.
Chanse, sining as he mans the forgoten freadoms helm.
"I dont know where I'm going,
I dont know where or when,
But give me a sword and a ship to sail,
And I'll never go home again.

I'd kiss the maids,
And bloody my blades,
I'd fight a hundread men.
But give me a sword and a ship to sail,
And I'll never go home again.-"

Mutanus redshirts
"We dont know why your singing,
Or how to make you end,
But we'll give you a ship and a mountan of gold,
If you never try singing again."

Chance "Every ones a critic"
Ver d'Gris "Actualy I rather liked it, but then I have a tin ear."
rampant

10-18-06, 08:17 PM		Kithle - Alright "Captain" Here's the payroll, the meal schedule, your daily paperwork (watch out the edges are vorpal), your current treaty (under revision) with the squirrel empire, and of course the status reports from various sectors of the ship. Don't forget your 3 o clock appointment with Kanatash.

Chanse - But I'm not getting counceling?

Kithle - You'll need it after being captain.

Chanse - I get the feeling I've bitten of more than I can chew.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-18-06, 08:52 PM		OOC: The second one would involve Ketler getting a girlfriend :eek:
OOC: Actually, it would involve Elina getting a girlfriend.

Er...boyfriend.

Chanse - I get the feeling I've bitten of more than I can chew.

Terra: :D You don't know the half of it. :D

Chanse: *sigh* What now?

Terra: You're forgetting the reason we don't get a lot of pirating done around here. :devil:

Lisa: :mad: Why, exactly, does this ship need to be attacked?

Chanse: Oh hell...

Lisa: Did they do anything wrong? What are you going to do to the people on board? The gold? How will you deal with the fallout from the reparations not being paid? *continue lecture*

Chanse: :weep: Why? :weep:
rampant

10-18-06, 09:03 PM		Chanse: :weep: Why? :weep:

OORampant - I've said it before, -

13 - and he'll say it again

OORampant - Your pain -

13 - Amuses them.

OORampant - Stop stealing my -

13 - thunder
Charles Phipps

10-18-06, 09:13 PM		Chanse, wrapped in soulmelds from his silvery half mask, to blue winged sandals. Stands before a croud of redshirts amid the lower deck, pacing with the athoraty of an orating tiger as he speaks.
"My frends, my neglected brothers, for too long have you been denyed your due, victims of the predation of others, langushing aboard a vessel more ship of fools than Ship of the line. Denyed the pirates right of loot and pillage. I come before you to change all that, I come to give you imortality, to lead you to grory and give you the names that will free you from the destany of your uniforms.

The Aundar ship 'The golden dancer' is taking a cargo of war repartations to Kranath, more than we could all spend in a year. She is lightly guarded, relyant upon her captain's skill for her defence, but-" explodes into moton drawing his heavy crossbow and firing twice at at target at the other end of the hall, bolts shuddring to a hault in the targets panted eyes, all in a hert beat "There is no defence aginst my aim. That you survive here at all marks you as skilled, tis ship, can be ours. If you agree to serve me"

Chorus of afirmation, loud cheering and thunderos staming on the deck below.

"You, the warforged at the back? how were you known?"

The warforged, clad in finest fassions over his silver plating, and wering a plumed 3 cornered hat "Ver d'Gris, finest swordsman in aundar" draws and florishes with a pair of fencing sabers.

Chanse "Exelent, organise your boarding party, twenty men, no more. Yuo sir, the shifter with the snaggle tooth?"

Shifter "Jack o'Bite, the Bloody Jawed bushwhaker of the Kranathi woods."

Chanse "Ceaze the helm and the weapons, as many men as you need. We move within the hour, we strike tmorow, before dawn, when the mist will mask our aproach."
To be, continued...

Rose: I could do that but I don't want to.

Ivy: There there dad.

Lilly: I give him a month before he goes crazy.

Rose: That long?
urial angel of death

10-18-06, 10:23 PM		Ivy: Lilly didn't you disappear.

Lilly: *poof of logic and is gone*

Ivy: Oops.

OOC: I'll try and get to the rest soon I just have a lot of school work.
rampant

10-19-06, 12:15 AM		Ivy - Don't you know where they are?

Tirmek - Why would I know that?

Sithis - It was your effect.

Tirmek - ...No it wasn't.

Ivy - but-

Sarah - Probably best to leave this line of thought alone.

Ivy - but- (looks at Tirmek's *glare*), nevermind
Norr

10-19-06, 04:54 PM		Halfling redshirt (in his head): Well, that went smooth.
Chanse: And someone get me that halfling!
Hr: :eek: *hides*
Ketler: What halfling?
Chanse: The one that's been blowing holes in my ship! He's in for a keelhauling!
Ketler: Thats pholly sir, he's a gnome.
Chanse: I don't care! They're all short! Get him!

Somewhere in the ships bowels
Phollie: Why do I get this sudden feeling of dread?
urial angel of death

10-19-06, 10:04 PM		Kerrith: *shaking Lilly* Get up!

Lilly: Zzz.

Kerrith: Get up damn you!

Lilly: Zzz!

Izzy: *appearing from the shadows* Why hello.

Lilly: *instantly awake* Boss fight!

Kerrith: Oh so now you get up. :rolleye2:

Izzy: Your friend did me a real favor sending us here. My mentor can no longer see me and there are no witnesses. There's nothing to stop me from using my powers.

Kerrith: Aren't I a witness. I don't think your master ordered my death.

Izzy: You're a wizard. You'll eventually do something deserving of death.

Kerrith: That hurts. :(

Lilly: Well if you think you can take us both, bring it on. *morphs hand into sowrd*

Kerrith: Melf's Minute Meteorites

Izzy pulls out a chain and triple dagger. He swings the chain around Kerrith's arms and pulls. This causes most of the little meteors to spill onto the floor in a smoke filled mass detonation.

Lilly tries in vain to see the smoke now filling the air. He hears footsteps from behind him. Lilly then pivots just in time to see Izzy bursting from the smoke. Izzy jams down Lilly's sword-arm with his dagger and follows through with a kick to the face. The lick sends Lilly reeling backward and onto the ground.

Izzy: For breaking the fourth wall I hearby sentence you to death! *draws knife across Lilly' neck.*

Izzy is hit in the back of the head by a flaming missle. He turns around to see Kerrith still holding on to a few of his meteorites.

Izzy: You! *rushes at Kerrith until he notices the sword-arm protuding from his chest**sigh* Yes I'm aware of the irony.*Is sliced in half by Lilly's rising blade*

Kerrith: *running down the hall* Thank you, human.

Lilly: *running beside him* No problem. You saved my life I saved your's.

OOC: I'll get to the rest later. Four more pages written.
Charles Phipps

10-19-06, 11:39 PM		Way back when

Achika: Why are we running away again?

Rose: We're heading into the Fire Swamp.

Achika: WHY!?

Rose: Otherwise we'll be captured by Prince Boranal.

Achika: What's wrong with Prince Boranal? He's been courting us!

Rose: EXACTLY!

Zella: I like your hair, it's so soft.

Terra: Thank you.

Zella: So have you been a druid long?

Terra: Not really....

Rose: AHEM.

Terra: Oh sorry, its just her ears. I've never seen an elf with ears that long.

Zella: *blush*

Achika: And yet another contribution to the bisexuality of elves that has been the focus of Leogolas fanfiction everywhere.

Rose: Quiet human. I hear something?

Achika: Could it be the Rous?

Rose: Rodents of Unusual Size? No, they don't...

*Giant Dire Rat attacks Rose like the Vorpal Bunny from Monty Python*

Achika: OH HELL!

Rose: AHHHHHH!

Terra: Fido! SIT!

*Dire Rat obeys*

Terra: Awwwww whose a cute widdle Rodent?

Rose: IT TOOK MY ARM!

Terra: Oh don't be such a baby. Once it plays with it a bit and chews on it, I'll just cast Re-attach.

Rose: IT TOOK MY ARM!

Terra: You should be more worried about catching fire.

*burst of flame sets Rose on fire*

Achika: Man, Rose just sucks doesn't he?

Terra: He's not the sharpest knife in the drawer, that's for sure.

Zella: Yeah, he's like a fork.

Achika: Or a spoon.

All Three Girls: Hmmmmmmm.

Achika: YOU SPOONY BARD!

*Rose runs around with one arm and on fire*
Kaizer_Ryu

10-20-06, 12:00 AM		OOC: :heehee

And something just came to mind.

IC:

Zella: Just watch out for the-!

Rose: *shoomp* *disappears*

Achika: :doh: Lightning sand...

Terra: *sigh* I'll get him...

She send a vine down into the sand, which grabs him and drags him out.

Rose: *gasp* I meant to do that.

Zella: :rolleyes: Suuuurrreee you did.

Rose: :mad: The fire's out, isn't it?!

Achika: And look! Fido's done with your arm. *pats the RoUS on the head* Good boy.

Fido: :D :drool:

Rose: That's more than a little distu-OH BLOODY HELL!!!

Terra: Baby. I'm just reattaching your arm...

Zella: Just because it's slightly mauled doesn't give you an excuse to whine about it.

*popping noises*

*Achika sidesteps*

*GOUT OF FLAMING DEATH*

*misses her by inches*

Achika: You know, this place really isn't that bad...

Rose: *stare*

Achika: Well, I wouldn't want to build a summer home here, but the trees are actually quite lovely.

*popping noises*

*the girls step away from Rose*

*Rose realizes his situation*

*GOUT OF FLAMING DEATH*

Rose: GODS DAMMIT!!!!
Charles Phipps

10-20-06, 12:44 AM		OOC: Ahhhh Rose.

It's like punishing Black Mage. It never gets old.
rampant

10-20-06, 12:46 AM		Satnak - (holding a huge mammoth femur) Serene?

Serene - huh?!

Satnak - Whats wrong?

Serene - I've never seen a meal dissapear so fast.

Satnak - I'm hungry:embarrass Want some rib meat?

Serene - Oh I fine, its just ...WOW!

Satnak - There's Crineapple Crisps for Dessert.

Serene - Where did you put it all?
Charles Phipps

10-20-06, 05:15 AM		A white room with only two figures and nothing else

Ivy: Where the hell am I?

Bald Drow in a trenchcoat: You are in....The Matrix.

Ivy: The what now?

Bald drow: No one can be told what the Matrix is.

Ivy: Uh huh. You don't know do you?

Bald Drow: Yes I do.

Ivy: Then you could describe it!

Bald Drow: You wouldn't believe me!

Ivy: What is it then?

Bald Drow: A Eldritch machine program that keeps all human beings trapped in dream states while they harvest the manna to feed the Quori that are actually AI from the time of giants.

Ivy: Bull****.

Bald Drow: See! I told you!

Ivy: *Kung Fu dropkick*
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-20-06, 10:01 AM		Way back when

Bunny (holding a flamethrower): Dammit, who are you people that refuse to die?!

13: Hey, I'm getting a workout here.

Silver: I think there's something very interesting about that elf.

13: The one with the porno ears or the one who likes porno ears?

Bunny: Oh, no you don't. I'm not having a repeat of that green dragon and the elf.

Silver: Don't know what that one human is going on about, though. Legolas is clearly gay, like that elf right there.

Bunny: Just so long as it doesn't involve enlarge person.

Silver: They both said they didn't want to be polymorphed, and the dragon wasn't willing to shrink—

Bunny: :mad: I don't need to be reminded.

13: Well, whatever happens, "Spoony Bard" should make my work with this guy easier.
rampant

10-20-06, 03:51 PM		Serene - It was nice meeting everyone.

Matron Stonechewer - Your a peach dear. Take good care of my Little Satnak would you.

Serene - I promise.
------------------------

Terrek - Your back for a while this time?

Satnak - School starts back in a bit so I need to be ready.

Terrek - Whats the maternity package like?

Satnak - Pretty generous, why?
rampant

10-20-06, 08:01 PM		Satnak - Unusual amount of redshirts above decks today.

Chanse - OH crap she's back, thats another uber with an inflated salary, and her wife. Gah at this rate we'll need 3 prizes a day just to break even.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-20-06, 09:23 PM		Satnak - School starts back in a bit so I need to be ready.
OOKaizer: You hear that?

OOUrial: :mad: I'm working on it! Give me a break, already!

-----

Sarah: :waits: I'm bored...

Tirmek: :bored: Seconded.

Ivy: :zzz:

Sithis: Sooooo...huuuungryyyy...

Sarah & Tirmek: :mymy:

*cue passing Redshirt and predictable result*

Sithis: Mmmmmm...tangy. O positive, I believe.

Sarah: :yuck: Ewwww...

Tirmek: Better it be some random Redshirt than you.

-----

Lilly: *huff* How long do we have to keep running? *pant*

Kerrith: *pant* Quiet, human. *gasp* At least *wheeze* you have *huff* the constitution *pant* to do this *gasp* kind of thing. *wheeze*

-----

Elina: I feel unloved... :allalone:
Charles Phipps

10-20-06, 09:47 PM		Back in the Matrix

Bald drow: Now, you must take either the Red or the Blue Pill.

Ivy: *swallows both*

Bald drow: OH DAMNIT!
rampant

10-20-06, 10:08 PM		Izzy - Wha what was that?
-------------------------------

Kithle - So much for a quiet night.
-------------------------------

Elina - Why is the ship shaking?

Lisa - I think your Aunt Satnak just got back.

Elina - Yay! can I go see her?

Terra - Wait until the tremors stop, she's probably... busy right now.
---------------------------------------------

OOC: Cypher, Urial I have sticks with which to poke the both of you.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-20-06, 10:18 PM		Elina: I feel unloved... :allalone:
Silver: That can be rearranged………:devil:

OOKaizer: SHE DIDN'T MEAN IT LIKE THAT!

Silver: Still…
*****
A guy in a dark cape and cowl swings mysteriously and silently onto the deck of the Forgotten Freedom in such a way as no one could detect him.

13: Hey, Jar.

Jarlot: GAH!…………Who—what are you talking about? (strikes a pose) I'm—

13: You're the only person who could swing over here so majestically in a Batman costume and still catch your cape on fire.

Jarlot turns around and sees the end of his cape in flames. He panics and rolls around on deck to put it out. However in doing so he rolls over the open deck hatch and plummets down, his cape snagging on a nail partway to the bottom and ripping the costume off.

Jarlot: ………………I'm okay.

Bunny: Nice to see you, Cap.

Jarlot (getting up): Why is this happening to me?

Bunny: I'm the death one. Should have asked 13 when you had the chance.

Bunny leads Jarlot toward where Marish is being kept for the deliveries.

Jarlot: By the way, where is that spoony adopted son of mine?

Bunny: Out rescuing his wife.

Jarlot: Again?

Bunny: Keeps him more focused then you.

Jarlot: ……………………*sigh* I was hoping to make a mysterious and useen entrance.

13: Don't worry, you still will.

Jarlot: What are you talking about? I lost my costume.

13: But now you're invisible.

Jarlot: What are you talking about?

13: No, really, your epic levels of Hide and Move Silently mean that you can move about how you want and no one will notice you.

Jarlot: :D That's true.

13: Plus the less you wear the stealthier you are.

Jarlot: That's completely logical by the rules.

They reach the door to Caralot's lab.

Jarlot: They're using this as a materinity ward?

Bunny: You woudln't believe how clean Caralot's mom got it while she was here.

Jarlot: Hmmm, probably should have been here for that.

Bunny: Never mind, just get inside.

Jarlot slips throuh the door. Everybody looks up quickly and stares. Jarlot walks confidently over the Marish's side knowing that they can't see him.

Jarlot: Hey everyone, it's me! But I'm invisible!

Terra: :eek: Oh, how I wish that were true.

Lisa: :blush: Ahem.

Marish: Jarlot, this isn't some weird idea you got while drunk is it? Because while I appreciate your sympathizing with my having to lie here naked, I do it all the time, you didn't have to do it yourself.

Jarlot: Wha……………(looks down)………:eek: ………(looks back up)…………………:whatsthis Meh. I've been in worse.
rampant

10-20-06, 10:23 PM		Rose - (singing) sneak sneak sneak past the stinky goblins

Goblin horde - Intruders!

Zella - I think this an example of a bardic music that just doesn't work.
--------------------------

Rose - Bluff Bluff Bluff the stupid ogre

Ogre - Hey!

Zella - oh your just doing it on purpose now.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-20-06, 11:07 PM		:heehee :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: to both. Hooray for Elan!!!

Elan: WOOOOO!! I'm invisible!

Vaarsuvius: Invisibility does not work like that!

Haley: K hen'y jikwigr oa'e srule huqp...

Durkon: Me eyes! Ah dinne need ta see that!

Roy: *groan*

Belkar: :mad: Stupid Mark of Justice. Must...kill...idiot...Bard...

OOC: Note - I have no idea what the code for Haley's speech is, so I didn't use it. Don't even bother. I just punched in random letters that don't work. She is saying something, though...

13: But you're not going to tell them.

OOC: Why would I? Frustration is so much more fun. :D

13: :mad: Ok, now you're stealing my thunder. That's my job as well.
rampant

10-21-06, 03:46 PM		Elina - Hey Fluffy!

Fluffy - Mrrrrrr (i got mommy a Fish!)

Elina - Don't talk with your mouth full.

*knock**knock*

*door opens*

Serene - Hello Elina! Fuffy!

Satnak - Oh breakfast!

Fluffy - (forks over the fish) Meroeow (this is hard without thumbs)

Elina - Where was he keeping the trident?

Serene - What brings you by?

Elina - Sarah and Tirmek and Them went off without me. *huff*

Satnak - Then why don't I show you some moves?

Elina - Really? cool

Satnak - The gym is this way but Hold on.

Squirrel with telegraph tied to back - Chirrup

Message reads:

Go ahead.

Signed
Terra and Lisa

Satnak - Ok then *tips squirrel* This one is called up the wall.
---------------------------------

Bunny - I thought you did mail?

13 - He works for me.

Bunny - How's that working out for you?

13 - They have an annoying habit of accepting acorns and birdseed as pay, outside that no major issues.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-21-06, 09:34 PM		:heehee :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: to both.
OOC: Thank you. I didn't think it was going to be seen as that good. I am, however, particularly proud of having Jarlot be indifferent at the end.

To new readers: that post is an example of not planning ahead. I had a vague idea involving Jarlot coming in as Batman and making a fool of himself, but everything else was ad-libbed.

Now comes the tricky part: I want to give Rose an annoying fairy companion to go with being Link, but I have no idea how to do it. With any luck my eventual improvisation will be hillarious.

OOcat: What are you going to do, give her a size fetish?

Silver: :devil:

OOcat: :bored:
rampant

10-21-06, 10:28 PM		Sparky - You done yet?

Liam - Geeze you want it done faster? help then

Sparky - You won't let me see the prints.

Liam - I mean hand me a screwdriver.
---------------------------------------------------

Ivy - Why are we in battle formation? Why not focus on finding my brother and getting gone?

Tirmek - Ideal as that is we need to be careful, we can't assume we'll find Lily first. We might find Izzy, or worse Kerrith.

------------------------------------------------

Kerrith - *achoo* There's *pant* that unloved feeling again.

Lily - Less talking, more running from the scene of the incident.
--------------------------------------------------------------

Elina - Ouch! Grrrrr this is harder than it looks.

Satnak - It took me a week to get this. Your already gtting a few steps in before your sense of reality kicks in. It must be weakened by living here at a young age.
cypher_zero

10-22-06, 01:50 AM		*Back on Teseris*

Terrek: You back for a while this time?

Satnak: School starts back in a bit so I need to be ready.

Terrek: What’s the maternity package like?

Satnak: Pretty generous, why?
Terrek: No reason… Anyways, I think Serene’s waiting for you to come to bed.

Satnak: But she doesn’t sleep…

Terrek: Hmm.. Funny; she didn’t say anything about sleeping…

Satnak: :embarrass

Terrek: Tell her to try and keep it down this time would you? The servants are complaining…

Satnak: :embarrass :blush:

---------------

*The next morning*

Serene sits on the edge of the bed as Satnak awakes.

Satnak: Ugh!

Serene: Oh, you’re up! :D

Satnak: Urrrgh…

Serene: You feeling alright hon?

Satnak: Sorry babe. These last few mornings, I’ve been feeling a bit sick… I’m not sure what could have happened to cause this sickness… In the morning, that is. Blegh!

Serene: Huh… I don’t know either… Maybe daddy’ll know…

Satnak: Nah… Don’t worry about it. I’m sure it’ll pass.

Serene: Ok. Well, I’ve got the servants bringing breakfast up, so you might want to get dressed. Here’s what you’re wearing today.

Satnak: Are you going to keep picking out all of my outfits?

Serene: :D

Satnak: … Where’s the rest of it?

Serene: Oh, it’s not that bad. Just put it on.

Satnak puts on a tight white t-shirt and hot pants.

Satnak: Uff! This shirt is really tight!

Serene: Read it.

Satnak looks down at the shirt and reads “WARNING: CONTENTS UNDER PRESSURE” in bold face type.

Satnak: … How long have you been waiting to get me into this?

Serene: :D

Satnak: :rolleyes:
.
rampant

10-22-06, 02:59 AM		OOC: :woot: Hooray he's not dead!

Bunny - Nuts!

13 - But now you have to stop poking him.

OORampant - Awwwwwwww :weep:

OOUrial - Whats the commotion about?

OORampant - :evillaugh:

OOUrial - I know this is par for the course for him, but why does this disturb me so much more than usual?

13 - Because since we know Cypher isn't dead, your the only one on his "to poke with progressively sharper objects list".

OOUrial - MEEP:eek:

Silver - Quiet you lot this is getting good.

Bunny - Why am I here:bored:?
------------------------------------

Satnak - Ugh 6 days, I'm checking in with a doctor... who's the best in town.

Serene - Daddy Hun.

Satnak - *grooooaaaaaaan* who do you go to?

Serene - Daddy Hun.

Satnak - Grrrrrrrr

Serene - What do you have against him?

Satnak - Bad first impression mostly. I really shouldn't be this irked at him, but he first showed his face about the time Lisa and Terra were getting hitched. I thought he was going to pull something there, and then those grafts he used on them. Toss in that the traditional leaders of the extermination squads the people of Khorvaire turned on my kind were the soul eaters, and you get a pretty low opinion of the man despite my deep love for his daughter.

Serene - How bout I go with you?

Satnak - Ok
-------------------------------------------------

Terrek - Ok this is wierd.

Satnak - What is?

Serene - (i.h.h. please be pregnant)

Terrek - Normally I'd say you're experiencing morning sickness.

Serene - :woot: *hugs everyone*

Terrek - I'm sorry, but I think its actually bad news.

Serene - (anime negative color shot for drama) What?!

Terrek - There seems to be some sort of infection. Its triggering pregnancy reactions, but there are dozens of parasites where the proto - embryo should be.

Satnak - Embryo's, I'd like to think I inherited some of my mother's fertility.

Terrek - Huh?

Serene - Your mother never had multiple births, you said it yourself just you and Ketty.

Satnak - Of course not, but all births start out with multiple embryos, as they develope the weak ones are consumed by the strogest over the first two-thirds of the pregnancy. This is basic biology.

----------------------------------

Silver - 11 down the drain,... what a waste.

Bunny - I like this system. If more Humanoids used this I'd so help you out.
--------------------------------------

Terrek - The Elves and Half-elves of the FF's Eberron do not use that system. Generaly a single embryo is carried through the whole term or less common 2 or 3. More are theoretically possible, but rare and tend to be underdeveloped.

Satnak - Ketty would say "where's the fun in that?" the moment she finds out She'll want them tracked for a Pool.

Serene - Huh?

Satnak - Give each a number, then have people place bets on the number. Each time one gets consumed, half the money on that one gets split up into the the bets placed on the consumer's column. The rest is divied out between the other survivors, until one is left and those who bet for that one get to divvy up the loser's bets.

Serene - Thats Awful:weep:

Terrek - Thats Barbaric!!

Satnak - What? its macabre, but what else is there to do? Its necessity. How many are there 6? 8? My mother was 3rd of 10. I can't stretch that far!! I can't eat that much!

Serene - You've been making a good go of it!

Satnak - I'm eating for who knows how many?

Terrek - 13, you and twelve proto-embryos.

Satnak - 13!
____________________

Bunny - So this kid is gonna have 11 counts of siblicide right off the bat! awesome.

Silver - I'm not sure how I feel about this.
---------------------------

Serene - At least put a stop to that horrid betting.

Satnak - I can try, but any psychic will be able to read their signatures, Ketty might have a chart ready the moment we set foot back on board.

Serene - THEN I'LL RIP IT TO PIECES!
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-22-06, 10:31 AM		Silver: They're supposed to eat each other after their born!

13: I'm totally on Silver's side here.

Bunny: Why?

13: Because if they aren't born I don't get to make their lives miserable! :mad:

Bunny: Chalk up another reason why this is a great system. :bored:
*******
Silver reappears in Caralot's lab wearing a luchadore costume.

Marish: :eek:

Silver: Ready?

Marish: HOW IN THE :censored: HELLS CAN ANYONE BE READY FOR THIS?!

Silver: Terra? Painkillers.

Ash: Hold on. There's something to be said for the feeling one gets at a completely natural—

Silver flexes into HUGE cartoon muscles.

Ash: :eek: Onsecondthoughtshecouldalwaysfaintfromth epainandwewouldn'twantthat—

Silver races into a dive with action lines, and grapples Marish around the bulge in her stomach just after Terra injects the catgirl with a very strong painkiller.

Silver: "DELIVERY CONTRACTION SUPER GRAPPLE!" *squeeze!*

Marish: :cloud9:

Silver: I'm not sure the painkillers needed to be that good…
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-22-06, 12:08 PM		Meanwhile, on the Golden Dancer.

”Damm fog, the lords of dust could be hiding in that. Its too quiet I say”

”Are you crazy? Its never too quiet, quiet means we get to safe harbour in good time”

”No, quiet just means something bad is coming and fates holding its breath”

”You worry too much.”

A ship, perhaps once an airship descends from the cloud ceiling, its hull a nightmarish patchwork, of flesh, metal and steel, fiends elementals and stranger things bound to it giving it power… It is the Forgotten Freedom.

”Now see what you done, fate is like an AB on shore leave with a pocket full of galifars, cant resist temptation. Too bloody quiet indeed”

ropes desend from the attacking ship, 20 men begin rappelling down them.

Ver d’Gris “Crew of the Golden Dancer, you have bean boarded by the Forgotten freedom under he aegis of her New Captain Chance Random, by his command those of you who join our crew will be granted a fair share of the gains. Those who surrender will be ransomed to your navy or family in good time and for fair price. Those who resist will be killed”

Golden Dancers First mate “B*gger that!” Draws a crawly honed falchion and charges Ver “Today, by my self Twelve men I’ve beaten”

Ver d’Gris “By the size of your gut, Id say they were eaten” in a hiss of steel draws his paired blades, spins, left hand steering the first mates attack wide, right striking in a deadly lunge. “I got the scar on my face during a mighty struggle”

Golden Dancers First mate “I hope now you’ve learnt to stop picking your nose.” Nimbly side stepping the thrust he continues “I’ve spoken with apes more polite than you” Brings his falcon round in a glittering ark and swings it at Ver’s hip.

Ver d’Gris “Nice to know you stay in touch with your family then” stops the First mates attack in a ring of steel and shower of sparks using a dual bladed parry. “I am the warrior with a heart of stone!” Feints with his left hand blade, brining his right around though the open guard in an eviscerating slash.

Golden Dancers First mate “Sticks and stones will- wait, that line never-“ Ver’s sabre shears cleanly through flesh and bone, the man dies.

Ver d’Gris “Any one else want to test the edge of my wit?”
*
Chance Random watches the duel and smiles. Now it was his turn. Green light, the essence of chaos shimmers around him, he pauses to slot a fresh clip into his repeating heavy crossbow, takes on a grizzled middle aged appearance. Leaps like a diver from the Forgotten freedoms prow. The Captain was at the helm, guarded by a handful of Aundar navy. He begins to fire, bolts silently end there lives as he drops towards them.

Twitching essentia to his Air step Sandals he lands. Levels his weapon at the captain, smiling like a wolf.
”Now I know what your thinking, and to tell you the truth in all the exitment I kina forgot myself. Did I fire five shots, or only four?
So what you need to ask your self, punk, is ‘Am I feeling lucky?’ Well do ya punk? Do ya?”

The captain lunges, Chance pulls his trigger. The captain sprawls back with the force of the bolt, slain.

Chance “I guess you felt luckier than you actually were.” Shrugs “Ok boys, load up the gold and the hostages. Jack, I want a prise crew aboard and us moving in the hour.”

(OOC: Charles Chance’s mutiny isn’t meant as an attack on you, just that it hadn’t been done and I felt it was time for some piracy arrr.)
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-22-06, 12:31 PM		Bunny: It's a very good day for someone to die.

A hidden Golden Dancer crewmember races at Chanse as the latter has his back turned, leaning on the railing to shout orders over to the Forgotten Freedom. However Chanse moves out of the way just at the last second, and the crewman tips over the railing and falls into the fog below.

Bunny: Turned out to be that guy. (high-five with Chanse)
urial angel of death

10-22-06, 02:24 PM		OOC: One moment please.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-22-06, 03:34 PM		OOC: :D Yay! The boards are working again! :D

Silver: I'm not sure the painkillers needed to be that good…
Terra: Just making sure. One hurts enough, I can't imagine four.

Silver: Meh. Fair enough.
urial angel of death

10-22-06, 04:54 PM		The two reach a bend in the hall and hear a horrid whistling sound. Disks composed of pure void slice through the air toward them. Two of the diskscleanly cut off Lilly's mechanical foot and his warforged arm at the shoulder. The metal arm comes apart the seams, becoming nothing more than mythril plates and screws even before it hits the floor.

Lilly: *lying on the ground* Well I screwed up.

Kerrith: Oh come on you silly human. *throws Lilly over his shoulder*

Lilly: Thanks.

Kerrith runs around the corner with his passenger into a room supported by six pillars, and slows to a halt.

Lilly: Why are you stopping?! He'll get here any minute!

Kerrith: I have a plan. *makes a few arcane gestures and phrases* Cat's Grace

Izzy rounds the corner and throws another blade of void at Kerrith. The drow dodges the projectile with new found quickness and grace. The void weapon continues on, cutting through three pillars without slowwing. Kerrith runs to the room's opposite exit. In a vain attempt to hit them Izzy lauches more void weapons, which slice through the room's remaining pillars. By that time though Kerrith and Lilly were safely inside the next hallway.

Izzy: *realizing his mistake* Oh no you don't!

A spear composed of dark energy shots from Izzy's palm and into Kerrith's shoulder. It digs through muscle and bone, bursting through the other side. Finally the roof, weakened from lack of support collapses on Izzy.

Kerrith: Well that should slow him down. *winces* Mind if I set you down for a sec?

Lilly: Leave me behind.

Kerrith: What?!

Lilly: I said leave me behind. With that shoulder wound you can' possibly carry me much farther. Hopefully I can stall him for a little bit.

Kerrith: *drops Lilly* See ya! *takes of*

Lilly: You bastard! You're supposed to be reluctant!

Kerrith: Can't hear you. *keeps running*
-------
Izzy crawls from the rubble , and heads into the hallway. All he sees upon entry is a maimed Lilly grinning maniacly.

Izzy: What are you so happy about?

Lilly just keeps smiling and touches a transmution circl drawn on the floor.

Izzy: :mymy:

The ground under Izzy erupts upward into a pillar of stone. The pillar shots up and smashes Izzy against the ceiling, crushing him into a gooy paste. After a few seconds the pillar shatters from a blast of psionic force. Floating where it used to be is Izzy.

Izzy: Didn't you really think that would kill me *notices Lilly's new gatling-gun arm and a feed transmuting out of the wall.* :twitch: This isn't going to end well. *is ripped to pieces by a stream of bullets.*

Unfortunately for Lilly forgot that you can only take so much matter out of a load-bearing wall beofre the ceiling caves-in...
--------

Kerrith hears the room collapse just as he reaches a balconey.

Kerrith: I've got to get out of here.

Izzy bursts from the debris

Izzy: *slowly approaching* One, two, Izzy's coming for you. Three, four, better lock the door...

Kerrith: Aren't you going to say the rest.

Izzy: I forgot the next verse.

Kerrith: Oh it's... it's... I don't know. :confused:

Izzy: Wait isn't it *head is blown off by a cannonball*

Kerrith: Great now we'll never know... :lightbulb Yay I'm saved.

Lilly: *Badly bruised and climbing off of a smoking canon* I'll take that as a thank you, but don't celebrate yet. He'll still regenerate.

Kerrith: Right. Grease

Liquid pig fat splatters all over Izzy's decapitated body. Kerrith then drops his last remaining meteor on it. Izzy burst into flames and is consumed.

Lilly: One last thing. *creats transmution circle that forms a stone dome over Izzy's ashes*

Kerrith: Huma- err... Lilly I would like to thank you for saving me. I misjudged you.

Lilly: Thanks for realizing. It's no big deal.

Kerrith: No it is a big deal... I shouldn't have blamed you for the sins of your ancestors.

OOC: Phippes if you want to type Lilly's reply you can.
Charles Phipps

10-22-06, 05:04 PM		Lilly: Why not? Humans are treacherous, evil, lusty, greedy, mean snakes!

Kerrith: Eh?

Lilly: Oh right, it's Eberron and we're supposed to pretend everyone has an equal potential for good and evil *snort* Come on, let's go.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-22-06, 06:04 PM		N+14: Makes sure to leave some Eberron undestroyed so we have something to do tomorrow.

Jarlot's New Rules So Long As I'm Back On The Ship:
X+1: If I'm turned into a duck and still decide to put on a crimefighter costume you are not allowed to name me anything that contains the words "dark" and "wing" nor any synonyms of those words.
X+2: No matter how appropriate it might be.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-22-06, 07:13 PM		Chanse "In your face Ash, I have a local god on my side." :D

Ash "Oddly Im the one who gets the chicks" High fives with silver.

Chanse :weep: "any way I have a plan to put in place..." Finds Terra.
"My Laidy, I have an offer to make, a generous stipend from the fresh influx of spoils to spend on Lingere, romantic nights with your wife and the like, in return for keeping her out of my hair. What do you say?"

(Kaizer, over to you as I dont know how she'd respond to such an open bribe)

Edited: To correct the adress of Terra's responce, thank you Urial
urial angel of death

10-22-06, 07:21 PM		OOC: Terra's entity is my good friend Kaizer, not my slight aquaintence Rampant who controls Satnak, her Eberron, Kithle, Chalky, and has partial ownership of Serene (I think)
Charles Phipps

10-22-06, 08:11 PM		The Final Battle with Erandis D'Vol

The Temple of Fiendish Villainy

Rose: So how exactly do we play this? The usual way?

Black Mage: I'm all for allying with Erandis D'Vol and destroying Eberron.

Fight: I like Swords.

*A 40 year old male wizard in red is wearing an evening dress*

Red Mage: Is this the part where we dress up in different sexy dresses?

Rose: NO! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! NO! How many times do I have to tell you that this isn't Final Fantasy X-2!

Thief: You know, I can't wait for people to find out that you actually aren't named Rose originally.

Rose: Quiet, we agreed to never discuss my former name.

Thief: Okay Edward.

Rose: Black Mage, stab him!

Black Mage: By 'him' you mean kill you all and take the treasure we've accumulated right?

Thief: According to the unbreakable contracts that you've all signed, technically you're bound by magical geas to be my slaves forever.

Rose: Why the hell am I back here? I mean, I had a good thing going. I was a Sky-Pirate. I was THIS close to getting the part of the Han Solo type in Final Fantasy 12.

Thief: Ripping off Skies of Arcadia doesn't impress anyone. Also, no one believes you were banging Rydia and Rose.

Rose: In any case, we have our substitutes right?

White Mage: We must protect the world from all evil.

Black Belt: SHORYUKEN!

Rose: okay, then we should be ready to defeat Erandis D'vol before she summons Chaos.

Chaos: YO!

Rose: DAMNIT.

Black Mage: My current inclination is to kill you all except White Mage before I corrupt her to the Dark Side and make sweet sweet love to her.

Rose: Guys, just go kill the damn Super Demon.

Meanwhile, Behind Chaos

*Zella is in Evil Over-Princess **** attire*

Zella: This is the worst rescue yet and that's saying something.

Erandis D'Vol: *knitting a sweater* What did you say dearie?

Zella: You're pathetic really. When I came into this operation, you could barely call yourself an evil overlord! It was always Mark of Death this and Mark of Death that!

Erandis: Family IS important.

Garland: She's scary grammy Vol!

Zella: And you! You are the worst excuse for a black knight since Michael!

Garland: My kid brother is not cooler than me!

Zella: SHUT UP AND GET TO DESTROYING THE LIGHT WARRIORS!

***

Elsewhere

The Real Light Warriors are awaiting execution.

Paladin: Weird, how every time we show up at a town, the Forgotten Freedom has already destroyed it and left no trace of the clues we need to save the world.

***

Bikke: Yarr.

Drizzl: This is pathetic. I used to have my own series before RA Salvatore decided Artemis was cooler.

Vampire: You are such a controlling....WITCH! This is all Vampire The Requiem's fault for ruining my LARP.

Zella: Quiet, you're about to rule the world.

Rose: We'll rescue you Zella!

Zella: Yeah, you and what army! Half the group is dead already!

*Rose looks over to the big foot that stepped on most of the party*

Rose: Black Mage? While I get some Phoenix Downs...

Black Mage: You don't HAVE to go to any trouble.

Chaos: Stompy stompy!

Black Mage: YOU HIT WHITE MAGE! HADDOOKKEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN NNNNNNNNNNNNN!

***

Cutaway to outside of the Fortress

*Hiroshima Style Explosion*

***

Rose: And that's how I saved the world.

*Chanse is tied up and ready to walk the plank*

Chanse: Mon'dier!
Kaizer_Ryu

10-22-06, 08:21 PM		Terra: *raised eyebrow* I'm a former druglord with more money to my name than the combined annual budgets of the nations of Khorvaire.

Chanse: ...sooooooo...is that a no?

Terra: That would be correct. Not to mention I'm not about to run interference if it involves stopping my wife from doing what she feels she must. Even if I wanted to, I wouldn't get very far. With the empathic link and our extensive history, she can read me like a book.

OOC: Ok, Eled, you're up. But seriously, Terra can't really do anything that would involve "keeping Lisa out of his hair". She wouldn't dare, even if she felt she could. To big a breach of trust.

And yes, Terra is that rich. She just doesn't like to show off.

Well...in that sense, anyway. ;)
Charles Phipps

10-22-06, 08:40 PM		Rose: Yes, Chanse, this is how you handle Lisa.

Lisa: Please Rose, there's no way in Hell that I'm going to fall for ANY of your tricks.

Rose: Lisa, do you like orphans?

Lisa: What does...

Rose: Just answer the question.

Lisa: Yes.

Rose: Is it wrong to steal bread for starving orphans?

Lisa: This is very di...

Rose: Again, the judge will please instruct the witness to answer the question.

Lisa: No, not really.

Rose: What if the orphans don't like bread, what if they like...gold pieces?

Lisa: That's incredibly stupid logic!

Rose: What if the entire crew of this pirate ship is made of orphans!

Lisa: I'm not going to...

Rose: *INFLUENCE REACTIONS*

Lisa: OH MY FLAME! HOW COULD I HAVE BEEN SO BLIND! YOU POOR THING!

*cries and hugs Rose*

Rose: Thank you.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-22-06, 09:16 PM		Bunny: Both Gilbert and Sullivan must be rolling over in their graves.

13: Wouldn't you know?

Bunny: I just kill them. Someone else deals with disposal.

13: I think this crew's thuroughly shredded any credibility d'Vol had. Now on to the captain contest.

OOcat: Wait, wait, I was going to give Rose an annoying little fairy companion.

Silver: You still have to do the deliveries of Marish's kittens. "CONTRACTION HOLD OF OVERWHELMING PAIN!"

Marish: :zzz:

OOcat: Fine, fine, I'll have 13 turn Rose's life into a complete mockery of Link after we pop some kids out of Marish.

So back to the delivery room………

Marish: :pint:

Terra: It's supposed to do that.

Silver: Riiiiiiiight. :rolleyes: *squeeze!*

Lisa: I think I see a head.

Silver: Hair color?

Lisa: It's……………gleaming?

Silver: Ah, that'll be Terrek's.

Stoic Terrek looks totally out of place among all the other nervous people here.

Lisa: I think one more out to do it.

Silver: "NUCLEAR SQUEEZE OF ABDOMINAL STRENGTH!"

Silver's move pushes the baby most of the way out, and Lisa gently guides it the final bit. She expertly ties off the umbilical cord and cuts it with one of Caralot's dissecting knives. Lisa holds it up so Terra can inspect it.

Terra: Hmmm, shifter. Male. Black hair that gleams. :confused: Living metal skeleton?

Terrek gingerly takes the baby from Lisa as the infant starts bawling. He holds the kid with one hand supporting the hips and one the head, examining the baby as one would a prize specimine of some kind. But there is a hint of something new upon his face, something like joyful pride.

Terrek: His name shall be Logan.

As if responding to the name, Logan's eyes open: they are obsidian with red irises.

Silver: Fortunately he doens't have to nurse, being almost pure living construct.

Jarlot: Metal skeleton and the name Logan? I thought I made a rule about that?

OOC: Okay, Cypher, Terrek should really say something for the moment. Explain himself, maybe?
rampant

10-22-06, 09:17 PM		Lisa - Ok I've got him.

Elina - *hammer*

Rose - Ouch!
----------------------

Tirmek - Sarah!?

Sarah - Yeah I hear them!

Ivy - Alright!

Sarah - This way!
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-22-06, 09:36 PM		Chanse "Thank you Rose, I hant thougt of that, amkes me wonder why I bind the silvr toung mask if Im not going to use it, but you have failed to realise something important."

Rose "Oh?"

Chanse "During your explanation I was able to free my self from your rather clumsy bonds... May you always rember this as the time you almoast caught Captain Chanse Random." he bows, and disapears.

(OOC: Ive so been wating to use that line :) )
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-22-06, 09:44 PM		Chanse "…… May you always rember this as the time you almoast caught Captain Chanse Random." he bows, and disapears.
Jarlot: Hey! :mad: That my line! I'm Jack Sparrow!

Bunny: Since when does he do commentary?

13: Since he became a wash-up retired captain.

*zing*
urial angel of death

10-22-06, 10:12 PM		Kerrith and Lilly(Now with transmuted crutch) are still walking through numerous halways.

Kerrith: I hope you get Sarah.

Lilly: Why is that?

Kerrith: Because you would make a far more enjoyable brother-in-law.

Lilly: You don't really think you can get Elina, do you?

Kerrith: Yes I do. I have seen so pretty amazing things in my life, that have shown me you can achieve anything if you put you mind to it.

Lilly: I guess.

Kerrith: What do you think that a lady like Sarah would see in a slave-race anyway?

Lilly: Tirmek isn't a slave.

Kerrith: I know, but most of his race is and he couldn't have rose that far.

Lilly: I'm pretty sure he's a noble, becuase he's Satnak's nephew.

Kerrith: :ahem: What! Next you'll be telling me that drow are roaming savages, humans are the ruling species, orcs have saved the planet, and men are the dominant gender.

Lilly: Well...

Kerrith: :uh-huh: Are they?

Lilly: All except that last one.

Kerrith: :surrender

Kerrith and Lilly finally round a corner that leads to something familiar, the other group.

Ivy: Brother!

Lilly: I missed you. *hug*

Ivy: Um, Lilly I'm over here.

Sarah: Get off me!
-------

several bruises later

Lilly: Sorry *falls over unconsious*

Kerrith: I thought you like Lilly?

Sarah: Kinda just not the particular place he was grabbing.

Kerrith: Oh. So Tirmek what was that attack you used.

Tirmek: A lesser version of the :lop: 's maze.

Izzy: *coming from down the hall* Ow ow ow ow ow.

Kerrith: Well ****.

Into view comes Izzy being dragged by his ear by a robed figure. Once again a voice imposes itself on the minds of the group.

voice: I had told you not to use your powers!

Izzy: Sorry master.

voice: Don't apologize! Get up and kill them properly. Oh yes and destroy the half-dragon as you would a vampire lord. He will play a part that is most detrimental to the future.

Izzy attacks again, but is quickly overwhelmed by the children, bound, and gagged.

voice: Well then you have defeated my apprentice. I guess it is down to me then.

Ivy: Who are you and why do you want to kill us? We have done nothing wrong.

Voice: Nothing wrong, *chuckle* nothing wrong :evillaugh You have violated one of the laws set down by the host itself. For that the only exceptable punishment is death. As for me I am the epitamy of what humans can achieve. I am the slayer of sinners. I am the celestial executioner. I am the first vessel of godly punishment. I am Adam.

The robed figure unleashes a piercing scream that knocks them all over and tears lines in their flesh.

Tirmek: That was pretty impressive, but you're no match for my aunt.

Voice: I have no idea how I stack up to my fellow flusher, but Satnak would never be able to lay a hand on me.

Tirmek: How do you know my aunt? :mymy:

Voice: I would hope to know my coworkers well. Whether Satnak knew it or not the gods desided that she would be their champion and she preformed the job exceptionally, until she was married. That was what caused me to get an aprentice, but enough talk let us fight.

OOC: Open to anyone who wants to do it perferably Rampant. His fighting abilities are only that of a normal person, but expanded on as far as possible. Think if a normal person can do something he can to and could probably make it hurt a lot, as demonstrated by his scream. Yes he is bunny's hand in the world.
cypher_zero

10-22-06, 10:34 PM		Terrek smiles slyly at Jarlot

Terrek: Actually, the rule states specificially, “A shifter may not graft adamantine to his bones and call himself wolverine.” As you can see, the bones were not grafted, nor are they technically adamantine. Also, I don’t have to follow the rules because I’m not part of the crew.

Jarlot: Huh?


Terrek: I’m not part of the crew. You, or for that matter, whoever’s captain at the time, doesn’t pay me. I just kind of hang around.

Jarlot: Doesn’t mean you don’t have to follow the rules!

Terrek: Phhhhhpt! Like anyone does anyways!

Jarlot: …

Silver: So… You wanna tell everyone else here how you hooked up with Marish anyways?

Everyone turns to look at Terrek. He looks back, his expression blank.

Terrra: Well…

Terrek: Well what?

Lisa: Silver just asked you a question.

Terrek: Who’s Silver?

Silver: WHAT! (waves hands in Terrek's face. He doesn’t move or acknowledge er at all.) I’m right here!

Lisa: She’s standing right in front of you! She’s the god-person-thing of fertility!

Terrek: … There’s no one in front of me. (Turns to Terra) Is your wife alright?

Everyone else: :uh-huh:

Silver: I can’t believe he can’t see me… :allalone:

Terrek: Yea… I’m just going to leave now… Call me when Marish wakes up…

*Exit*
.
Charles Phipps

10-22-06, 10:48 PM		*A hundred and one kittens are on Rose and around his room*

Lisa: Good Flame, are all these Marish's offspring?

Rose: Oh no, I've been accumulating Shifter babies in preparation for the birth.

*Rose is chopping onions into a stewpot*

Rose: That's a good Menchi!

*plenty of the kittens claw at the door*

Rose: Why don't you take a NICCCEE little bath

*begins lowering one of the cute mini-Marishes into the boiling vat*

Lisa: Rose....

Rose: Uhhh yes?

Lisa: Are these children ORPHANS?

Rose: The non-Marish kitties are.

*blinks*

Rose: Oh crap.

Lisa: Then we've found someone to donate all that gold you stole from Chanse to!

Rose: http://darthno.ytmnd.com/
rampant

10-22-06, 11:31 PM		Tirmek - Sithis, escape with the others. Keep Spikey bound.

Izzy - My name is IZZY!

Tirmek - ...Gag him while your at it. *call spiked chain* *incarnate warhammer* *incarnate Avatar* *inertial armor*

Energy, coursing green, sapphire, and black, surrounds Tirmek. Graning him protection weapons and the visage of the great and terrible Thorn d'Tharmis. Dark thorns cover both weapons and flesh.

Tirmek - (Lashing out with chain and hammer) We will not tolerate your crazed zealotry, cease your attacks against us or be destroyed. (telepathic sending: Sarah get help, your the fastest and the stealthiest. I can take a beating, you know that better than anyone.)

Voice - You would stand alone against me?

Tirmek - *Swipe* *Smash* *lunge*

Voice - *leap back* *block* *counter throw* SHhhhhhh, those thorns?

Tirmek - I'm not very good at the avatar meld, *picks himself up* you needn't worry about the venom. *sucker kick* Kicks on the other foot.

Voice - I hate the smartasses.

Tirmek - *hammering*

Voice sidesteps the hammer and puts Tirmek through a wall.

*frrriiizzzzzip*

Tirmek's left ear is caught and tattered by the debris.

Tirmek flings the chain around the voice and pulls himself up.

Voice - Mildly impressive.

Tirmek - *spits blood and a tooth onto voice*

Voice - Again with the smartassness?
----------------------------------------------

Satnak - ( over a toilet ) *barf* Urg

Serene - Here try this Terra said it would help.

Satnak - :yuck: these are awful.

Serene - They must be good for you then.:D
----------------------------

OOC: Feel free to torment her. :evillaugh
Charles Phipps

10-23-06, 01:32 AM		Rose: Well, I've decided to paint all non-Marish Kittens red.

Terra: Yes, we have REDFURS!

Kanatash: Ah, more to abuse!

*Kanatash prepares to kick one*

Redfur: :bigeyes:

Kanatash: GAH!

Redfur: Poochoo.

Kanatash: Must...resist.

Redfur: :bigeyes:

Dozens of Red Furs: :bigeyes:

:invasion:

Kanatash: OH HOLY HELL!

Redfurs: :bounce: Poochoo! Poochoo!

Kanatash: RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! *throws himself overboard*
rampant

10-23-06, 01:46 AM		Kanatash - Schnookie we never opened the box from Satnak and Serene.

Caralot - All right! Stabbity Death

Box opens to reveal a veiwer homed in on the barney universe, and a small purple doll that smells faintly of feet.

Kanatash - What the FF?

Caralot - *pokes doll* cute is one thing but this creature is just sick and wrong.

Barney on screen - who's poking me uh-huck?

Caralot - Hmmm (pulls out a hammer) *wham*

B.o.s. - My head!

Kanatash - Oh this will be fun :evillaugh:

Caralot - Please tell me thats not contagious.

---------------------------------

OOC: :evillaugh it just might be :evillaugh
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-23-06, 10:18 AM		Silver: :mymy:

Terra: What?

Silver: I knew they had to exist, I just didn't believe it.

Terra: What exists? Or doesn't exist?……………:confused:

Silver: People who don't want to see me.

Terra: Hold on, hold on…………………………people don't want to see you………………because your existance is too horrible to comprehend?

Silver: Exactly. Normally it's Bunny and 13 who have to deal with that, but I guess Terrek is just one of those people who can't handle things that are terrifying.

Marish: As interesting as this conversation is, can we get on with this?

Silver: "SRANGLEHOLD OF DELIVERING PAIN!" *squeeze!*

Lisa: Black feathers. Okay, so this Ash's.

Silver squeezes the baby the last few inches. Lisa attempts to clean off the feathers, but eventually needs help from ash. The child resembles a small black furred shifter kitten with a ravens beak and tiny flutering feathered wings.

Ash: It's a male, so his name is Cole.

Cole begins wailing, then gives a little burp which sets his father's head on fire.

Terra: :bored: He's certainly your son.

OOC: Eled, a few words.
Chrys

10-23-06, 10:59 AM		Again with the future…

Len, Sil and Hrist are fighting over the Time magic for people who can’t ‘forget’ about the rules, When Volrath walks in…

Volrath: I’ll Show them that there is No way the Darth Vader will Beat Optmus Prime! Oh Hey girls.

Len, Sil and ‘H’: Hi daddy!

Volrath shakes his head and wonders why they are always fight… he then blinks as he realizes what they where fighting for!

Volrath: No Don’t…

Then there is a flash of light… and then the book and his first three daughters vanish.

Volrath: Crap… now I’m going to have find get them back before P/Y/R finds out…

P/Y/R: Before I find out what Dear?

Volrath: :mymy:
rampant

10-23-06, 11:46 AM		Satnak - Bunny? isn't this more silver's thing?

Bunny - Not with the way you do it.

Serene - Hmph.

Bunny - Anyway she's busy with Marish.
----------------------------------------------

Rose - I just hope Satnak's kid doesn't turn out o be a boy.

Chalky - Huh?

Rose - Think about it, both parents female, their best friends another female-female couple with two daughters. One aunt, the only male role-models in there are Tirmek and Terrek.

Kithle - Boohoo I wear girls clothing because I have no daddy! Pity me. Are you sure we're talking about Satnak's kid? or your childhood?

Rose - Hey how is that never mentioning that again!

Kithle - The cheerleader outfit or the school girl costume?

Rose - Those are Zella's!

Kithle - Why were you wearing them?

Chalky - (using the other two's distraction to look at everyone's cards) I raise 10.
Crystalforged

10-23-06, 01:58 PM		OOCrystalforged suddenly turns up at the brothel where Kanatash and Caralot have been spending the last week.

Kanatash: Ah, you're back I see.

OOCrystalforged: Yes, yes I am. By the way I noticed you showed up briefly back on the ship, how did you pull that off?

Kanatash: I didn't create a new duplicate if that's what your implying, I still remember what happened last time. Let's just say that the time-space continum is my b****.

OOCrystalforged: Fair enough.

Kanatash: Well, what now then?

OOCrystalforged: I'm not quite sure. I can't really mimic the other entities too much in their character's honeymoons.

Caralot: Really, why not?

OOCrystalforged: Well primarily because except for a few interesting sites they visited most of the time was spent with :pile: or inuendo relating to :pile: .

Caralot: So? Can't you do that for us too?

OOCrystalforged: I'm afraid not. Kanatash already knows my reasons but let me explain the workings of my head to you. You see there are three primary voices in my head, there are others but these are the most important. The first is obviously Kanatash, the second is Bob, he's the one who whispers the dark secrets of the universe into my ear. He's always trying to get me to awaken the great old ones on this side or sing the song that ends the universe. He's hilarious, really cracks me up, great guy. The third however is sever fraction of my mind that fully comprehends the :pile: life of you two. For the sake of my own insanity I've been forced to lock him away but he still always frees himself and tries to tell me the secrets which will break my mind.

Caralot: Oh. :(

OOCrystalforged: Don't worry though, I've provided Kanatash with internet access and information on how to use a search engine so he should have more than enough material to keep you two busy for quite a while.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-23-06, 02:23 PM		Chalky - (using the other two's distraction to look at everyone's cards) I raise 10.
"The way of the Card shark is string in this one" 'Doc' Random, the Stormreach kid.
*****
Ash gently strokes his sons wings with quiet awe, his voise calm and for once free of its undertows of pyromanic longing.
"'What was stolen, shall be shared, what was unleshed, bound' You have a hard road before you my son, just as well you need not walk. A roost, home, family. Id forgotten what it was to have the three. No more running, no more hiding. No longer shall I be thrall to the flame, but rather its master, again..." he glides back a little, giving Marish space, but staying nearby.
rampant

10-23-06, 06:33 PM		Zella - I have no Idea what rose is talking about. I call bluff boy.

Andrea - Call and raise you five. Pass the Drinks. (when he moves the tray my zombie in the rafter will see his cards)

Chalky extends other hand the extra two feet needed to get the tray without shifting position.

Andrea - Thanks. (i.h.h. DAMN!)

Chalky - Call and raise 5.

Rose - Call

Kithle - Call

Zella - Call

Andrea - Call

Zella - Read'em and weep 4 of a kind.

Groaning

Chalky - Suited flush.

Zella - *gives chalky the finger*
Norr

10-23-06, 06:36 PM		In the deepest bowels of the Forgotten Freedom rule eternal darkness. Down here, darkvision and blindsight are the only modes of vision, any light would attract far too much attention. Terminal. And yet, a torch is bobbing up and down, slowly making its way through the corridors of this most unholy of crevasses. Occasionally, pairs of eyes glitter lust beyond the radius of the light, but none dare enter the luminous area. Holding the torch is a halfling redshirt. The few threads left of his clothing are held together by caked blood. None of it his. His mouth is frozen in a perpetual mad grin, revealing teeth filed to points. Some of them are filed too deeply, long ago coagulated brown blood turned slime with saliva coats his now rotted teeth and cracked lips. His skin might once have been pinkish, but now its vaugely yellow and cracked, seemingly caked with dusty mud. His eyes seem to be the unaffected, but they seem glazed... dead. Over his shoulder he carries a large sack, between the seames are smears of dried blood.
He stops and looks around. He is in a large hold, boxes are stacked here and there, labels long since faded. He looks at the floor. No dust. It seemed... polished. And varnished.
Suddenly he topples over and hits the floor with a odd squashy sound. The sack lands beside him. It seems to contract briefly, but remains still. So does the halfling.
Before long a strange lanky thing, sort of like a thin ape with no fur, carefully scuffles over towards the dead redshirt. It sniffs the body once. The horrid stench of rot would have made it flee instantly, but that was not to be. The halfling sprang to life and lunged at the ape thing, ripping its throat out with his filed teeth. After the ape thing had ceased its death throes, the halfling let go and stared out into the darkness, seemingly contesting its creatures to his kill. When nothing stirred, the halfling picked up the still burning torch and propped it up so that it wouldn't set fire to anything. He turned to his kill, drawing a serrated knife with wich he almost lovingly cut the flesh into nice little bits. Then he ate them, like a starved dog digging into a fresh meal. When he was finished, he picked up the only mellow things left uneaten: two round marble-sized pieces of meat. He put them into the sack, wich seemed to undulate slightly as he propped it up onto his shoulder.
The halfling thing took his torch and stalked off into the darkness.
As the light disappeared into a corridor, a tiny squirrelish thing watched from the rafters. It threw up. Twice.
when it had finished, it leaped down the network of suporting beams of the hold until it perched on top of a crate just a few feet from the feeding ground. The air had a sickly sweet smell to it, putrid mold already starting to devour the splintered bones of the ape thing.
This was bad.
It had been ages since that vampire had hunted this place. Even if the upper levels were still prowled by 'daylight crew', the deep bowels had gone unpatrolled for too long. Strange things were turning up, even for the Forgotten Freedom. The tiny thing spread its wings and retreated back to the rafters. The bones were gone now, and the mould was dying away. Within a few minutes there would be no traces of the rotted halflings' passage left. But the halfling was not the worst part. The bag had moved.
He had no doubt the halfling would find a way to breed... if it hadn't already.
The bag was really preying in his mind now.
This needed drastic measures, and there was only one place to get those. The Upper Decks.
He flitted through the air toward his nest. The Deep Bowels were only marginally more dangerous than up there.
He would need his toothbrush.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-23-06, 07:42 PM		Half-toaster chief/shaman (emerging from behind some crates): And that, my child, is why we still rule this realm unopposed by fleshy beings.

A tiny fairy *zings!* out from behind him.

Fairy: Wowwowinteresting, iiiiiiinnnnnnnnninteresting!

She writes this all down in a flurry on a little pad of paper. Her outfit and glasses suggest some sort of academic, evne though it's clear she's smoken' hot. Her voices is perpetually rapid, as if her entire blood consists of nothing but caffine.

Fairy: Do you know how these creatures originate? How do they reproduce? Does their diet consist only of meat, or can they eat other substances found down here? Are they the top predator, or is there something even higher up on the trophic scale?—

Half-toaster: There is no more I can teach you of this one.

Fairy: Awwwww, :( .……………………:D Soanyway are there any dragons down here because I've read that dragons can live anyway they have endless variation potential which reminds me are you sure that there aren't any elves down here I could swear they're like roaches—

Half-toaster: These decks are sparse with life due to the dangers, of which you have witnessed only a taste. The most numerous are the constructs such as myself, as well as the savage half-biscuits—

Fairy: —who reproduce just by being eaten! Yesyes, but that's no good without also knowing the method the environment uses to keep the population in check. And I don't just want to know about the common rodents, I want to discover the fantastical creatures, the one's that'll take their breath away at……………

The half-toaster is silent for a moment as the fairy chatters on incesantly.

Fairy:………There has t be an entity I can interview about the most dangerous creatures around here. This place is the gold mine of dangerous creatures.

Half-toaster: There is always one who can be consulted about danger.

Fairy: Good, then where is he or she or it or they—

Half-toaster: It is not one who can be sought out.

Fairy: Well then how do you expect me—

The half-toaster becomes all solumn and mystical.

Half-toaster: Warriors who've come within a foil-layer of death report that for the moment when the blade is strikes their opponent seems to change, to become another form. Those who've watched creatures be killed report that a dark shape always deals the final blow. When one dies because they were too foolish there is sometimes heard maniacle laughter, and two long long black ears are just at the corner of vision.

Fairy: So is this like some sort of god or spirit? Because that's perfectly fine, intereviewed a few gods of slaughter in my day there was Erythnul man that guy never stopped—

Half-toaster: I do not know what it is. It is not a god we half-toasters revere. Some do not even speak it's name for fear of drawing it's attention. But I know this much: mocking it brings death as fast as acting foolishly in battle.

Fairy: Well what's it called?

The half-toaster shaman looks around warily. Then he leans close to the fairy with a look of complete seriousness upon his face.

Half-toaster: The Bunny……………

OOC: Don't do anything with this yet.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-23-06, 07:53 PM		Ash sits directly on the Elemental ring, under the ship, in the Lotus position, in one hand a vial of tarry green fluid, in the other a jaggedly cut pice of black opal.
The Vial holds a diluted quanity of a rare poison, one that supresses Psionc potental.
The gem is near perfect, polychromatic fire burns in ebony depths... It is apropriate.
He feels, as ever, the hunger of his madness, but he rembers other times. times when the Flame had been a passing intrest, and he had lived in the shadows. He had been very different then, not a hero. There were no saga's of his deeds, no songs or headlines to his noblity and courage, but he had lived as one.
Now he can rember only enough of those times to know he had fallen, and he needed to decide how to climb. In one hand he held a way to supress the things he had unleashed. In the other, perhaps a way to do without it.
A desision is reached. Ra-tok is dead, burned to Ashes. Flame is the core of what remains, he will learn nothing by deminshing it. A stronger cadge is not enough, but if his faling is that he is too much the flame there is a path to the best of what he was. add to himself. Take back the shadows. He turns his thoughts to the gem, imbuing it with the echoes of Ra-tok's joy of shadows, with the quiet whisdom that had alloyed with his intrest in conflagaration, and, though it felt mildly strage to do so, the fragmented recall of his consience. The gem would be a map and a guide. The contest... Only his first test.

(OOC: Gladius, is Liam about done on Satnacks plane? I was going to do do a skit on there adapting wersian devises to power Psionics, and then get to the contest )
rampant

10-23-06, 08:09 PM		Elina - Aunt Satnak who are they?

Satnak - Probably just my melds Incarnum is the power of the soul externalized. Your sight should pick up on that.

Elina - I know the spirits of incarnum, they are merged. These are individuals.

Satnak - Don't tell your parents yet Serene wants to do that when they finish with Marish. I'm pregnant, Serene has given me a child. :)

Elina - It looks more like twelve.

Satnak - Oh not to worry the excess 11 will be consumed by the strongest.

Elina - Excess! thats a bit...

Satnak - Cold? harsh? I don't get the people here sometimes, its biology for crying out loud!

Elina - The way you talk...

Satnak - There's no point in sugar coating the truth here. The 11 that are consumed are the first test for the survivor. That is the one who will be my child!

Elina - Your just writing off the others, like they don't matter. Are they not also born of Serene?

Satnak - ... Terrek offered me a choice. He can remove all but one from my body. Have them brough to term in an artificial womb, or held in stasis to be re-implanted one by one. I told him that my body would not nourish a single embryo properly until the last third of my term. He can solve that as well.

Elina - Then whats the problem?

Satnak - Because... its not right! Its not what I am. I was eighth of 8, Ketty second of 9. My people evolved this way to keep us strong. To root out those so weak as to be undeserving of life, passing this test is what makes us people. A soul is forged in this, no one of the vessels inside me can contain a complete soul. Out of the many one must be forged. At least thats what my mother taught us, as her mother taught her, and so on.

Serene - Thats why we asked for your help.

Satnak - On the other hand I can't ask you to help without your parents knowing.

Elina - This is incredibly important.

Serene - Exactly, on the one hand you may be the only one who cn help us. On the the other your very young, and it would be wrong to force you into this if either you or your parents are uncomfortable with you being involved.

Elina - Then why tell me now?

Satnak - Becuse you asked.

Serene - This is a major issue, involving deception would only cloud things further.

Elina - And why not use Terrek's abilities?

Satnak - He can sense only sense so much. The weakness and lack of definition he detects could be either incompleteness or extreme youth or both.

Elina - What next?

Serene - We leave you alone, until your parents are free. Then you three have to decide whether your ready for this.

Satnak - For now I think it best if we let you think.
-----------------------------------------------------------

Serene - Maybe we should have not done that?

Satnak - She should know first. Its her help we seek.

Serene - Is it right to involve one so young though?

Satnak - I was a year younger than her when I had to start fending for myself. She is wise and strong of heart. I'd trust her with my life. Youth is no reason to disqualify her. Just as age is no qualifier.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-23-06, 09:48 PM		Bunny: Wait, I'm confused: do they want them all to survive, or do they want to let the whole thing take it's current course?

13: Not like any of us could help. We do things that happen, not make them happen.

Bunny: Well at least you and Silver know how this is going to **** me off.

13: You're death: you don't like things to be undecided, unfinished.

Bunny: And then people call me cruel because I like to be definite. :mad: I'd like to see them live in a world where things didn't stop functioning. I'd give it 42 seconds.
*******
13 appears next to Silver.

13: Satnak and Serene need Terra and Lisa. Speed things up.

Silver: "GREAT SQUEEZE OF THE EXPELLING VOLCANO!"

Lisa: Breech birth. And the legs are very canine.

Marish (who is awake now, but still not feeling any pain) squeezes Cuddles's paw. They look at each other with pure warmth and love in their eyes.

Bunny: :yuck: I wish I could work on myself.

13: :D Why I work with Silver.

With a bit of a grunt from Marish, the little canine-feline hybrid is expelled from the birth canal. Silver takes a moment from contracting to clean this kitten herself. In fact she is taking much more of an interest in this one than the first two.

Silver: Vital statistics: (OOC: copied from the PM Rei sent me)
Gender: Male
Fur: Shiny silver, with a deep brown stripe around his neck. (runs her fingers through it) My guess is constantly poofy, even when wet. His paws/hands are brown like the stripe.
Eyes (concentrates with a funny look on her face): Blue with vertical pupils.
Ears: Pointy, cat-like.
Nose: Short snout. The nose is half pink, half black.
Hmmm.……(tickles the baby's toes, which begins it crying.)…He'll be able to switch between two and four legs as he walks, likely preferring four when he runs. His "feet" are paws, his hands are relatively humanoid, with clawed fingers.

13 (also copied from PM): And an impressive set of canines. :devil: Favorite Foods: Ankles, shoes (new), spleens, catnip. Yup, this guy's one of mine.

OOC: Rei, a few words from Cuddles.
Rei32491

10-23-06, 10:22 PM		Marish (who is awake now, but still not feeling any pain) squeezes Cuddles's paw. They look at each other with pure warmth and love in their eyes.OOC: :bored: You enjoy that far too much.

IC:

Cuddles: Then I dub thee: Admiral Wolverine Lightningbolt!

Others: :uh-huh:

OORei: What? Those are the three coolest words in the UNIVERSE!

Cuddles: *sniff* I'm so happy... :weep:

(elsewhere)

Nalfein: *smoking* IT BUUUUURNNSSSSSS!!!!!! IT BURNS, PRECIOUS!!!!

*bursts into flame*

Nalfein: OH, UNHOLY GODS, IT BURNS!!!!!!!

*begins melting*

Nalfein: I'm melting! I'm melllltttiiiiiing... Oh, what a world...

A few moments later, he reforms.

Nalfein: Ah, good. The fire's-

*bursts into flame...again*

Nalfein: GAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

*this is going to go on for a while. Let's get back to the proud father*

Cuddles: My Nalfein senses are tingling... Meh. I'm gonna get little Lightningbolt a snack.

He picks up the little cub by the scruff of his neck, and carries him off.

*later*

Random Redshirt: OH YE GODS!!!! THE FANGY PAIN!! *snap* *gurgle* *choke* *dies*

Cuddles: When you're old enough, I'll show you how to hunt these things. They're tricky little blighters. Just don't attack the ones that have names. Unless it's Pholly, Devon, Phollie, Devon, Doog, Devon, Ketler, or Devon.

A.W. Lightningbolt: :zzz:

Cuddles: Awwwwww. He's sooooo cute! :cloud9:

(elsewhere...again)

Nalfein: THE AAAAAAGGGOOOOOONNNNYYYYYY!!!!!!!!

13: I love my work. :devil:
Kaizer_Ryu

10-23-06, 11:04 PM		OOC: I'm quite intrigued as to what you're up to, rampant.

IC:

Way back when

Terra: What does Achika see in him?

Zella: Rose does have a peculiar dashing dashyness about him, despite his almost complete inability to do anything heroic.

Terra: Do you ever feel like a third wheel?

Zella: At times. They really do love each other.

Terra: Then why stay with him?

Zella: One requirement of my Videogame Princess class is to have a boyfriend or other romantic attachment be ready to embark on an epic quest to save me.

Terra: ...that's it?

Zella: Did I mention the dashing dashyness? Though...I do get lonely sometimes...

Terra: He's obviously not looking after you properly. You have needs, too. I just can't understand why he isn't all over you. You're gorgeous.

Zella: Oh, stop it. You're making me... :blush:

Terra: Don't be so modest. You've got beautiful eyes, silky smooth skin, one hell of a bust...and those ears? Rrrrrroooww. :devil: :drool:

Zella: :blush: :embarrass :blush: ...is that a proposition?

Terra: :D Yes.

Zella: ;) Ok. *glomph*

*later*

Terra: Wow...

Zella: You're not so bad yourself... Where'd you learn to do that one thing with...

Terra: An old friend of mine. She'd never admit to it, though. :D

*birds chirping*

Terra: They're coming back. We'd better wrap this up.

Zella: Wanna do it again sometime?

Terra: Just give the word. ;)
Charles Phipps

10-23-06, 11:08 PM		OOC:

BWHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

;-)

Well done Kaizer.
Charles Phipps

10-24-06, 12:27 AM		OOC: And some more of the Way Back When series...

Elsewhere

*Rose is tied to a rack*

Rose: Where am I?

A Much Younger Igor: [raspy voice] Thhhhhe Ppit of Desssssssssssspair! Don't even ttttttthinkkkkk...

[clears throat]

A Much Younger Igor: ... don't even think about trying to escape. The chains are far too thick. Don't dream of being rescued, either; the only way in is secret. Only the Prince, the Count, and I know how to get in and out.

[Igor begins cleaning wounds]

Rose: So I'm here till I die?

A Much Younger Igor: Until they kill you, yeah.

Rose: Then why bother curing me?

A Much Younger Igor: Well, the Prince and Count always insist on everyone being healthy before they're broken.

Rose: So it's to be torture?

A Much Younger Igor: [nods enthusiastically]

Rose: I can cope with torture.

A Much Younger Igor: [shakes head enthusiastically]

Rose: Don't believe me?

A Much Younger Igor: You survived the Fire Swamp, so you must be very brave, but no one withstands The Machine. I wonder how you were caught.

Rose: Well I was having sex with Achika and went unconsious.

A Much Younger Igor: No wonder Prince Boranal was mad.
rampant

10-24-06, 01:01 AM		OORampant - Serene wants to try to save them all, Satnak wants to let things run their natural course.

13 - Awww their first fight how cute.

OORampant - ...I've got my eye on you.

13 - (i.h.h. I love it when I get them all paranoid)
--------------------------------------------------------------

Andrea - Raise ten.

Chalky - Raise 15

Zella - Out.

Rose - Call

Kithle - Out.

Andrea - raise five

Chalky - Raise 10

Rose - call

Andrea - Call

Chalky - all in.

Andrea - ..... razzafragging...Out

Rose - He's bluffing call.

Zella - How can you tell, his game face is perfect.

Rose - He has no game face. He just removes all of his features.

Kithle - Precisely.

Rose - Anyway as a bard I have a finely honed ability to sense misdirection, and deception. Besides, four kings fuzz for brains.

Chalky - 4 aces spoony.

Rose - Those are 2's with the second mark covered in white out.

Chalky - I know, your hand is awful, shouldn't have bet so much.

Rose - But these are yours.

Chalky - No I have these kings over here.
urial angel of death

10-24-06, 07:15 AM		OOUrial: Yes Satnak is showing more evilness

OOKaizer: Why does that make you happy?

OOUrial: To prove a point. Anyone who does not do good for the sake of good will become evil if given too much power.
Lord Kale Fangblade

10-24-06, 07:44 AM		Sa’vor strode across a bridge of twisting tentacles that occasionally writhed in an attempt to drop Sa’vor off the bridge. Around him was the twisted landscape of Xorait, beneath him was a lake of blood, in which swam creatures that looked like they where completely made of teeth. On either side of that where vast plains in which writhing thin tentacles replaced the long grass, amongst the crass strode ostrich like creatures composed completely of razor blades with heads of huge garden shears. They strode amongst the “grass” occasionally pausing to shred some creature with more tentacles, eyes or clawed appendages than was sanely possible. Across the bridge was a floating island which was populated with huge tree like things, their braches ended in hands each of which had a insect like eye on the back. Across the tree’s various appendages was draped human skins, obviously removed from a trespasser in this realm.
The “tree” was covered in large pustules and sores that oozed puss, which was drank by what at first glance looked like squirrels. Before you noticed that their busy tails where replaced with tongues and that their eyes where replaced with feelers. Sa’vor watched in interest as several of the squirrel like creatures began flaying a unfortunate trespasser, then between them carrying the skin ran up the tree’s and draped it over the branches as if it was some kind of decoration.
Sa’vor watched as the trespassers skin regenerated and the process began again. Sa’vor smiled as he saw several Torschari move through the woods at the edges of his vision. Sa’vor let out an idle pulse of arcane magic and sent them scurrying for cover. No aberration was going to wear his flesh.
Sa’vor eventually found the centre of the grove, in which floated Kanatash.

Kanatash: Ah, Sa’vor. Come to marvel at the beauty of my garden?

Sa’vor: you know, a few thousand years ago I would have called this “ Insane” now I see that it does have a certain beauty about it.

Kanatash: ready to turn to the Mad lords?

Sa’vor: *a small smile* perhaps not this visit. You know why I have come yes?

Kanatash: you wish to warn me and present a gift.

Sa’vor: indeed. I guess that you either read it from my mind, which might be possible or you gathered it from the minds of the people I have visited.

Kanatash: *insane smile* one of them? Perhaps both. Or maybe even none of them?

Sa’vor: A darkness approaches Kanatash, a threat that if I do not attempt to change it. You shall all surely die.

Kanatash: That bad ? I would be interested to know what you saw, though I guess that the boy is involved. The seventh son of a seventh son. Powerful. Dangerous.

Sa’vor: only if he is not trained wisely.

Kanatash: so you send him to us, what better way to learn than at the heels of the most powerful people in all eberron? Then what is the gift?

Sa’vor: two things, the first; a Dark secret that I learned during my studies. The second, a shard of insight, a portion of what is to come. And now I must leave.

As Sa’vor turned to leave his foot brushed up the dirt that hid something, a small shard of crystalline glass. Within it was an image, of the old Kanatash. Sa’vor brushed the dirt back over it with his foot and vanished
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-24-06, 08:32 AM		Kanatash: ………The seventh son of a seventh son. Powerful. Dangerous.
13: Hey, you know what that means!

Silver: We need a living luggage chest with feet, an ape librarian, and a useless wizard who's very good at running away from everything and anything.
********
Way back when
Silver: Score! :cheer:

OOC: Just for anyone who's joined us late, this Igor Charles is using is not the one who works on the Forgotten Freedom: that Igor is older than Eberron.
********
OOC: :bored: You enjoy that far too much.
OOC:Not really. What I enjoy is watching you squirm. :devil:

Also I think meaningful relationships are an essential part of life.

13: Believe me, it's being serious.

OOcat: You're getting quite a workout these days.

13: And I was originally just a temporary enemy. Shows what characters can become on this thread…………………
*********
The fairy approaches a room in the hold made of stacked boxes. The complex formed by them is huge, but spartan, and while no inhabitants can be seen there is a constant low "ommm". The fairy just flits straight through, ignoring any of the side corridors. Eventually she reaches to the entrance to a central chamber. A being sit in front of it in meditation, a living spell formed from Evard's Black Tentacles, able to block the entire entrance.

Being: Who are you? Why do you wish an audience with my master?

Fairy: Oh wow I heard all the rejects were thrown down here. (whips out her notepad) So who were you created for: Jaela, the paladin, the shifter catgirl……………
rampant

10-24-06, 02:03 PM		OOUrial: Yes Satnak is showing more evilness

OOKaizer: Why does that make you happy?

OOUrial: To prove a point. Anyone who does not do good for the sake of good will become evil if given too much power.

OORampant - How is she being evil?
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-24-06, 03:51 PM		OORampant - How is she being evil?
PARANOID-OOcat: WARNING! WARNING! REAL LIFE DEBATE TOPIC HAD BEEN SPOTTED! PLEASE DO NOT PURSUE OUTSIDE OF CHARACTER! PLEASE DO NOT LET REAL LIFE GET IN THE WAY OF THE STORY!
rampant

10-24-06, 04:07 PM		Credit to Lord Kale FangBlade

Before Sa’vor was a Great vortex that drew everything towards its centre, Sa’vor strode towards the second figure. Here and there little sparks of eldritch energy jumped between Sa’vors fingers and danced along his outline, the only outward sign of him fighting the flow. Tirmek watched him intently.

Tirmek: Sa’vor I presume?

Sa’vor: Perhaps, Though I could easily be some other being wearing his form.

Tirmek: you could, but I’m willing to take the chance that you are Sa’vor. And that you have a valid reason to trespass in my mind.

Sa’vor: I have Visited you to Warn you.

Tirmek: of what?

Sa’vor: the future. A storm is gathering, A storm that will bring great disaster to you all if you are unprepared.

Tirmek: I suppose you cant give me any details can you?

Sa’vor: no.

Tirmek: how are you able to reach my mind from the reality you now reside? It would take vast amounts of energy even for you. Unless… Unless you had some kind of beacon. Some kind of link with us, some way in which you could I fact with very little power expenditure use to get yourself here.

Sa’vor: *Smiles* indeed. Now who do you think I’m using as a beacon?

Tirmek: You and Terrek are bound by a promise are you not? An oath that you would repay him, you also have a mental bond that allows for the transfer of energies. He has a claw in your soul, you have a hand in his mind. Interesting…. How did you figure out how to do it?

Sa’vor: I was sat in my lab thinking of how I could warn you of things to come, when I remembered how I and Terrek where linked and that he was able to gain Psionic power from the link. So I decided that if he could access my mind from his side I could reverse the current and him as the dimensional anchor I required to decrease the energy requirements.

Tirmek: interesting… do you think that Terrek could be able to contact you?

Sa’vor: most likely though for him it would cost more of his energy than it would for me. You know, you remind me of myself.

Tirmek: How so?

Sa’vor: you like me are bound by hatred of your heritage. For you it is your Fiendish side, for me it is my Elven side. Both of us hate our fathers, both of us are naturally gifted. You even though you are trying to remove the hatred, to destroy its source are still bound to him. Your life belongs to him, everything you do every day is bound to this hatred. Like with me it will eventually consume you.
* Images flash, battle fields. Destruction. Flames. Blood. And in the centre of it all maniacal laughter*

Tirmek: I’m trying to remove it. But its still there, day after day. Sometimes I just want to scream with so much hate in me.

Sa’vor: I understand. The thing you lack is something to base your self on. All your life you’ve been living off hate. Now is the time to find something else.

Tirmek: like what?

Sa’vor: a calmness. Somewhere that you can go to within yourself where everything is at peace.
I found such a place, and now I’ll share the memory with you.

Sa’vor opened his left hand, to reveal a small globe of light blue energy. It floated towards Tirmek, whom reached up and touched it.

In an instant he was in a wooded glade, light shone off the water of the nearby lake. Nothing stirred, there was only the small sounds of the far away wildlife, the area irradiated calm. It seeped through Tirmek and eased the pain of hate, the horrible pangs of agony. Leaving calm through all of him.
The memory the vanished. Tirmek was once again standing opposite Sa’vor.

Tirmek: that was…. Amazing. I felt… at peace. Calm. Where was that?

Sa’vor: It was a place I once visited about two thousand years ago. The memory of it has never left me. Whenever I feel stressed or that the anger will once again take me I return there, and everything once again becomes clear.

Tirmek: what should I do with this? *gestures to the globe of energy*

Sa’vor: Take it. Consider it a gift. Keep that place always within your heart and the hate can never claim you. Nurse this seed of calm, let it grow. And eventually it will replace the hate.

Sa’vor fades away

Tirmek - Now if only I could find a way to fight the fear.
----------------------------------------------

Serene - Why are you being stubborn about this? You're hardly a big fan of tradtition, and well these are our kids Dammit!

Satnak - You see twelve, I see one, If my mother was right then keeping them apart would turn them into near soulless husks, bits and peices of the people they could have been.

Serene - People?

Satnak - Order counts, the way mom said it was " each represents part of the whole, those that consume the others define which natural traits will be dominant ". If thats true then we save nothing trying to save them all, and we lose the one child we could have.
Charles Phipps

10-24-06, 05:28 PM		Rose: If you turn 11 of the children into shifter cubs then I'll happily take them off your hands.....

*WHAM*
Charles Phipps

10-24-06, 05:29 PM		WELCOME TO THE FIRST ANNUAL FORGOTTEN FREEDOM BEAUTY PAGEANT FOR CAPTAIN

*Jarlot walks in stage in a tuxedo with a mike*

Jarlot: Hey folks! This is C....*ahem* Judge Jarlot here for the contest to determine whom will lead the Forgotten Freedom into the next Great War. I'm your host and together with the rest of my judge companions...

*points to King Steve Boranal Ir'Wynern, Princess Sarah Ir'Wynern, and Queen Aurala Ir Wynern*

Jarlot: We'll determine the lucky person that will be taking over this ship.

King Steve: I just want you to know that I invented Halloween.

Jarlot: Uh right Steve.

King Steve: And my first act is to send in troops to crush the insurgents in New Cyre.

Princess Sarah: What insurgents?

King Steve: Well after the rape and murder, I'm fairly sure SOMEONE will be fighting back...

Princess Sarah: :stare:

Jarlot: Okkaayyyyy.

Queen Aurala: Oh joy! Flowers and LOVE!

Jarlot: Yes Glinda.

King Steve: I'm so ronely, I'm so ronely.....you know Sarah, I'm going to invite all the Screen Actor's Guild to help me take over the world.

Princess Sarah: Yes dad.

Jarlot: Our first contestent up is Sakura Jarlot! My daughter and a sure fire winner.

*Igor walks up to Jarlot and whispers in his ear*

Jarlot: WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN SHE RAN OFF AND GOT MARRIED TO A PALADIN!?

*Igor whispers*

Jarlot: A *GUY* too!? What's this ship coming too!

Igor: Sawry.

Jarlot: We'll be back right after these commercial messages.
rampant

10-24-06, 05:35 PM		Jarlot - And I go kill my son in law.
urial angel of death

10-24-06, 05:57 PM		OORampant - How is she being evil?

OOC: Eating babies is always evil, and allowing an evil act to take place is evil.

IC: Tirmek is awakened from his mental message by a swift kick to the groin.

Voice: You shouldn't have let your guard down.

Tirmek: Cheap shot!

Voice: All's fair in love and war, but if you really feel that way let me help you up. *extends hand*

Tirmek: Ah ha! *grabs Adam's hand and begins to swing him over his head.*

Voice: I knew you would do that. *reverses momentum at the exact top of the swing, so that all movement stops. He then swings down and swings both feet into Tirmek's stomach, followed by a painful crushing sound.*
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-24-06, 06:16 PM		OOC: Eating babies is always evil, and allowing an evil act to take place is evil.
SYSTEMS-CONTROL/PARANOID-OOcat: WARNING! REAL LIFE DEBATE BREACH! PATCH UP THE HOLE, PATCH UP THE HOLE! DO NOT PURSUE THIS LINE OF DEBATE! WARNING! DO NOT LET REAL LIFE RUIN THIS THREAD! WARNING!

OOcat: However, I think there is something we need to consider:
Animal young will sometimes eat, or simply kill, or at least starve out their siblings. Is this evil? Animal parents sometimes eat their own young, and will very likely do so if the other option is letting the nutrients go to waste. Is this evil?
If you say no for the reason that animals do not have the moral capacity then how can you assume that these embryos have a greater moral capacity? If you do not then any action they perform, no matter how disgusted you may be, is not evil by virtue of their having no moral capacity. And therefore it is not evil to let it happen.
Charles Phipps

10-24-06, 06:32 PM		OOcat: However, I think there is something we need to consider:
Animal young will sometimes eat, or simply kill, or at least starve out their siblings. Is this evil? Animal parents sometimes eat their own young, and will very likely do so if the other option is letting the nutrients go to waste. Is this evil?
If you say no for the reason that animals do not have the moral capacity then how can you assume that these embryos have a greater moral capacity? If you do not then any action they perform, no matter how disgusted you may be, is not evil by virtue of their having no moral capacity. And therefore it is not evil to let it happen.

In the context that they're unable to become sentient without eating one another (divorcing it from real life completely) then it's not an evil action because they're not capable of being people. Still, it's pretty damn gross.

:-p
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-24-06, 06:39 PM		OOC: We haven't been told yet definitively that they have to eat each other to become sentient.
Still, it's pretty damn gross.
Just so long as you recognize that gross things sometimes have to happen.
rampant

10-24-06, 06:52 PM		OOC: Tirmek never fights fair and gets annoyed when his opponents try to do so. Just a note.
--------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - How stupid are you? guhhhhhh

Voice - Why won't you shut up and die!

Tirmek - I am Tirmek, you are a threat to me and mine. Gruhhhhhh, you must be removed.

Voice - Are you daft? did i hit your head that hard?

Tirmek - Possible, I'm a little foggy. How many walls did you put me through?

Voice - 1, 2, .... at least 8.

Tirmek - Yeah my limit is seven. Hisssssk

Voice - Haha that was funny. higik!!

Tirmek - Yeah about not needing to worry about the poison... I lied:D
----------------------------------

OOC: I really didn't mean for the debate to flare up like that. Should have been more careful about ripping off Faerunian and Greyhawk Drow.
Charles Phipps

10-24-06, 07:23 PM		OOC: We haven't been told yet definitively that they have to eat each other to become sentient.

Just so long as you recognize that gross things sometimes have to happen.

1. Then I'm inclined on the evil route. Sort of like the Drow kids strangling each other in the womb like the Dragon article says they sometimes do.

2. True. For example, Rose will soon have a nice Marish Kittens shaded pair of pants!

BWHAHAHAHHA!

And it's fun to occasionally do oddball stuff like that. Personally, my opinion is Satnak has been evil for farrrrrrrr longer than this ;-)
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-24-06, 07:40 PM		1. Then I'm inclined on the evil route. Sort of like the Drow kids strangling each other in the womb like the Dragon article says they sometimes do.
OOcat: Drow get no love.

Silver: There are those myriad Dri'zzt clones.

Bunny: And that was an example.
And it's fun to occasionally do oddball stuff like that. Personally, my opinion is Satnak has been evil for farrrrrrrr longer than this ;-)
13: Just remember that there's evil and then there EVIL. The first is just being cruel. The second is being cruel for the sake of pointing out how being cruel makes people stupid.
For example, Rose will soon have a nice Marish Kittens shaded pair of pants!
Norr

10-24-06, 07:50 PM		Three weeks ago
Flamekeep, Thrane

In Cardinal Krozens room all lay quiet. An aura of strange light spread throughout the room, transforming everything it touched into horrible vestiges of their original forms. Things of shadowy seaweed caressed the walls and holy symbols of the room, leaving them slick with breadcrumb-filled saliva. Floorboards writhed and rubbed against each other, like worms in some perverted mating ritual. Eyes opened on the spines and in the pages of books, each starting to read itself aloud backwards trying to find hidden messages from the demon in the flame. The curtains clawed at the closed windows with soft folds, crying like lost children for their mothers.
The floorboards started convulsing horribly, and like the womb some strange and horrible beast, one of the cracks in between them opened, expelling Cardinal Krozen in a flood of thick mucus. As the light died away the rooms furnishings settled down, the visages of Xoriat leaving them (except one or two books, which joyfully yelled "42! It's 42!"). On the floor, Krozen (still covered in mucus) groaned. When he dared open his eyes, he realized he was back in his office at Flamekeep. At first he relaxed, relieved for not being near the that accursed ship anymore.
Then he realized something.
He was still wearing the bondage gear.

After the first few bouts of panic, it was clear he couldn't get the horrible contraption off without help. And he didn't want to think about what the servants would think.
An idea struck him. After slipping in the mucus a few times he managed to get to his feet and hop over to his desk. There he found a slip of paper and an pen. On the note he wrote a short message.
Attention All Flamekeep! We of the Forgotten Freedom have decided not to tolerate your percecution any longer. I hereby present you with a Ultimatum. If any further hostile action is taken against us, we will select an individual of high regard from within your organization and visit upon him or her all the horrors the Forgotten Freedom and its crew has to offer. We have sent you Cardinal Krozen as an example of procedures should you choose to ignore this missive.
Signed
Rose
Captain of the Forgotten Freedom

After reading through the message a couple of times, Krozen thought it satisfactory, if not too refined. He grabbed the note and looked around for a reasonably comfortable place where he could be found, and headed for the diván. After two steps, he slipped on the mucus that had been slopping off his body. His head hit the floorboards and the world went black.
urial angel of death

10-24-06, 08:02 PM		In the context that they're unable to become sentient without eating one another (divorcing it from real life completely) then it's not an evil action because they're not capable of being people. Still, it's pretty damn gross.

:-p

Yes an arguement that mindflayers are neutral
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-24-06, 08:05 PM		Floorboards writhed and rubbed against each other, like worms in some perverted mating ritual.
Silver: Or Caralot and Kanatash.

13: I'm fairly certain he didn't mean that disturbing.
If any further hostile action is taken against us, we will select an individual of high regard from within your organization and visit upon him or her all the horrors the Forgotten Freedom and its crew has to offer.
13: Already did that: Jaela Darran and Cardinal Krozen. Jaela, however, being the child of Jarlot is basically immune to the FF. Krozen, however, is a favorite playtoy of Kanatash.
Charles Phipps

10-24-06, 08:18 PM		Yes an arguement that mindflayers are neutral

I doubt its because a nonsentient eats a brain to become intelligent.

Mind flayers are evil because they continue to do it.
rampant

10-24-06, 08:33 PM		OOC: I thought they were evil because they practiced slavery, cheated at yahtzee, and tried to take over the world every week.

Bunny - Yahtzee?

13 - You had to be there:D
rampant

10-24-06, 08:39 PM		OOcat: Drow get no love.

Silver: There are those myriad Dri'zzt clones.


How many of his "siblings" did Drizzt bump off?
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-24-06, 08:51 PM		How many of his "siblings" did Drizzt bump off?
OOcat: I keep saying: let's not go there.

Bunny: Before or after he was born?

OOcat: YOU'RE NOT HELPING!
rampant

10-24-06, 09:36 PM		OOC: You wanna end the debate, have jarlot's kid so terra and lisa are free.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-24-06, 09:52 PM		OOC: And now, something to distract from the debate over morality that shouldn't even have come up. BTW, the whole thing is neutral at worst. That's all I'm gonna say. If you want to disagree with me, urial, please don't do so on the thread. PMing or calling me is so much less intrusive to the rest of those trying to enjoy a HUMOR thread with elements of DRAMA such as the following. I'm not trying to single you out, several of us have done it. You just happen to be the one violating the Karmic nature of this thread at the time.

IC:

Voice: Accursed poison...

*somewhere in the cosmos, a 20 is rolled on his Fortitude save*

Tirmek: :mad: Dammit. It still won't save you from another dose.

Voice: If you even get the opportunity, consider yourself lucky.

Tirmek attempts to ensnare him with is chain again, but his movements have slowed considerably from the damage. Voice grabs the chain and swings Tirmek into another wall. A blur goes by, grabbing Tirmek before impact.

Voice: Another one? So many fools today.

Sarah: *from the darkness* Sticks and stones, little man. Sticks and stones...

As she bursts from the shadows, he sees her eyes are blood red. A look of malevolent joy is plastered on her face. As she closes in, he steps aside, landing a blow across her face. Righting herself, she comes at Voice again, leaping up towards the ceiling. She crests right in front of him, and he times his strike to use her own momentum in the blow. However, he misses badly when Sarah pushes off the ceiling and lands beneath him. The pain in his gut from her sucker punch nearly knocks the wind out of him as he stumbles back and tries a counter.

Voice: (i.h.h.) The Rakshasa child has worn me down. This girl seems at least on par with him...

She flips over his kick and rushes him. He simply falls backward, kicking up as Sarah passes over him. It catches her in the chest, allowing him a moment to right himself as she recovers.

Sarah: Don't stop now, ego boy. I'm just starting to enjoy this! RRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAGGHHHH!!!!

Voice: :eek: Oh cra-! *KRAPOW*

The wall splinters and shatters as he passes through it, barely managing to get into a roll and coming to a stop on his feet. Looking back through the hole, he can see Sarah in the dim light. That joyful grin was really getting on his nerves, but...those eyes, they seemed to glow. Calling this girl overpowered was an understatement. She is an abomination!

Sarah: Seems you're not all you're cracked up to be... How disappointing.

Three images of Sarah took the place of one. One went left, another right, and the third remained where it was. He could hear all three of them, but he knew where the original was. The one in front came at him first. This one was merely a distraction. It passed through him harmlessly. The two at his sides attacked in tandem, and he struck out with a kick to the left one-

Tirmek: (i.h.h.) Keeping her wits while berzerked. She is a most frigtening girl...

-and hits nothing. Midway though the motion, the real Sarah appears from behind him. A loud crunch followed by screaming is heard throughout the room as she crushes his exposed hip joint. Before he even hits the ground, Sarah grabs his arm and swings him through another wall.

Sarah: *in pursuit* Fight back! It's no fun when it's one sided! :devil:

Voice lands on his good leg, shrugging off the pain in his shattered hip as best he can. The child is on him before he can breathe, bowling him over as she bites his ear. Tearing her and part of his ear off, he pulls a German Suplex, slamming Sarah headfirst into the floor. She flops to the side, unconscious. He then stands up, wincing terribly.

Voice: *pant* Such annoyances. No wonder they beat Izzy... She'll be out for a while. Time to finish of the other brat. *pant*

He turns to look for Tirmek, only to find the boy standing by the hole in the wall. He still appears somewhat tipsy from the battle, but it really doesn't detract from the look of malice on his face.

Tirmek: I'll have you know...I am very put out.

Sarah: Ah hah...ha ha ha hahahaha!!!

Voice turns to look at her in disbelief. She stood up, wiping blood from her mouth. That damned smile was still on her face!

Sarah: That's what I'm talking about! Too bad it has to end.

OOC: Ok, I'm done for now. All three are hurting pretty good after this. I'll let urial or rampant take it from here.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-24-06, 09:55 PM		OOC: You wanna end the debate, have jarlot's kid so terra and lisa are free.
Back in Caralot's lab Silver turns to Terra and Lisa.

Silver: You two are free to go.

Terra: Wait, why? :confused:

Marish: Because this last one is between me and Jarlot.

Terra: Huh?

Jarlot:………………It was my idea. You see, I wasn't a great father to Michael and Jaela, and don't even get me started on Rose. I may be a worthless braggart—

Lisa: Believe me, you are.

Jarlot:—and a shameless scoundrel—

Lisa: That too.

13: The book Complete Scoundrel is based off you.

Jarlot:—and an undependable louse—

13: That's not true: you are a very dependable louse.

Jarlot:—but I never wanted to be a deadbeat dad! And so this time I will be there for my……………um……………

Silver (whipser): Son.

Jarlot: And so this time I will be there for my son, from his first moment—

Silver: To cut a long and comicly over-acted monologue short, if Jarlot can't go through this birth without support 13 has to "politely" remind him of his obligation every day.

Terra: So it's a torture bet. :bored:

13: Best kind. :devil:

Silver: So go, another entity wants you.
rampant

10-24-06, 10:52 PM		Elina is waiting in the living room when Terra and Lisa enter. She has sculpted Kitsune's blade form into a glowing fox plushie, which she is hugging tightly.

Lisa - Whats wrong sweetie?:(

Elina - *dismiss blade* *sigh* Satnak and Serene need help.

Terra - Lets get going then, where are they? whats the threat?

Elina - No, not like fighting. They have a moral conundrum and they think I can help them solve it.

Lisa - Lets sit down and talk this over slowly.

Elina explains the situation.
----------------------------------

13 - Lazy

OORampant - You type it then.

Silver - We don't exist

OORampant - Thats no excuse.
---------------------------------------

Terra - Wow no wonder they're all so...

Lisa - Hypercompetitive?

Terra - I was going to say aggressive.
-------------------------------------------

OOC: your up Kaizer
Kaizer_Ryu

10-24-06, 11:52 PM		Elina: I...I want to help, but...

Lisa: *sigh* That's quite a favor they're asking...

Terra: They really believe you can do it, otherwise they'd never ask this of you.

Elina: I know...

Elina sits on Lisa's lap as Terra tries to reassure her.

Terra: Your aunts are just trying to make the best descision they can. They want your input to help them with it. You're not making the descision for them.

Elina: :weep: What if I'm wrong?!

Elina buries her face into Lisa's shoulder as her fear gets the best of her.

Lisa: *hug* Honey...if it's too much, just say so. They're not going to force you into it. But you have a wonderful gift, and a chance to do some real good with it.

Elina: :weep: It hurts sometimes, Momma. I can hear them...

Lisa: *rocking* I know...I know...

Terra reaches out and strokes her hair.

Terra: *softly* Honey, look at me for a moment...

Elina lifts her head up and turns to Terra.

Terra: You don't have to do it if you feel it's too risky. But would you be willing to give it a shot? If you're not certain...if you have any doubts at all, then that's your answer. You know that neither your Aunt Satnak or Auntie Serene would ever want to make you decide on something this big if you weren't positive.

Elina thinks for a few minutes, then wipes the tears from her eyes.

Elina: I...I'm gonna try it.

Lisa: Are you absolutely sure?

Elina: *nods*

Terra: No one will think less of you if you don't want to. No one will be mad at you.

Elina: I know, Mom. I still want to give it a shot. I don't want to look back and think I could have done something to help, but didn't even try.

Lisa: *big hug* That's my girl. Just remember; no one is forcing you to give an answer one way or the other. If you can't tell, you can't tell. None of us would ever dream of holding it against you.

Elina manages a weak smile as Lisa lets go of the hug.

Terra: Do you want us to be with you?

Elina: I wanna try by myself, but...

Lisa: We'll be right here if you need us.

OOC: Ok, rampant, back to you.
Charles Phipps

10-25-06, 12:42 AM		Welcome back to the first annual Forgotten Freedom Beauty Pageant

King Steve: Off with your head.

Messanger: *is dragged off* BUT I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!

*sounds of his horrible demise occur off camera*

King Steve: Oh wait, did I forget to say I was just kidding? Hmmm, oh well.

Jarlot: Yes folks! It's an exciting beauty pageant today and we have plenty of candidates for viewing on the position of Captain!

Queen Aurala: Except you of course Jarlot.

Jarlot: Shut up, you dirty dirty ho.

King Steve: I think my first act is to declare the expulsion of all halflings from my land.

Jarlot: Our next candidate is hot! hot! HOT! Except when she's cooool....

Queen Aurala: How cliche.

Jarlot: She hails from Karrnath, 6'2, favorite book is the Necronomicron, likes tennis, dislikes turn undead abilities, has no current boyfriend, and is a Duchess that's 2nd in line for the throne when we disregard the 90 or so undead members of the Royal Family. Andrea D'Glycine!

*Andrea wears stunning black evening dress while being carried on a panniquin by zombies*

Andrea: Thank you, I'm so happy to be here.

Jarlot: So, Andrea, what would you do if you became Captain?

Andrea: My first act would be to murder the entire remaining living population of the crew and raise them as non-sentient undead under my control. A few rare exceptions would be allowed to rise as ghouls or wights.

King Steve: 10.0!

Jarlot: We're not voting yet!

Princess Sarah: Duchess Andrea, what kind of tree would you be if you were polymorphed into one?

Andrea: An undead flesh eating Treant. Or a willow.

*drops her dress to reveal a stunning black one piece*

Jarlot: Well she hates the crew but is STUNNING in the caboose. 9.7.

Aurala and Sarah: *grimace*
rampant

10-25-06, 01:54 AM		Later

Satnak - Thank you. *hugs Elina*

Serene - Any information at all would be helpful.

Elina - *raspy voice* Thank you, I appreciate the sentiment, but I can't feel my ribs now.

Satnak - Sorry:embarrass

Elina - Stand back.

Lisa - I thought you said this wasn't going to look like anything fancy.

Elina - Awwww mo-OM, I had this whole freaking routine planned!

Porom - Should we go?

Elina - Yeah get out of here.

Palom - Are you kidding me? I haven't seen this many hot babes in one place since I snuck into your slumber parties.

Hammered x3 + 1 kick in the nads

Palom - Oh gods i can feel them in my chest cavity.

Porom - *drags him away*

Elina - Fine just hold still Aunt Satnak.

Elina concentrates for a moment.

She peers into flecks that reside in Satnak.

A weak pulse of bloodlust, an irresistible surge of curiosity, intellect, insight, desire, imagination, kindness, ambition, joy, fear, love, and through it all a song. A song that heralds great things to come.

A shape begins to form. Wings everchanging form and number, four tendrils always seeming to be attached to different places on an unpercieved yet bipedal form, 10 eyes some of every color some of no colors at all ring the figure, 3 more form a floating face, patches of crystal armor laced with mithril appear and dissapear form temporary glimpses at an other wise unseen shape.

Form - we are, we must become

Elina - Become what, who are you?

Form - We are, We must become

Elina - You are, what must you become?

Form - WE MUST BECOME

Elina - Become whole? become many? become alive? Why are you so small so pure?

Form - WE ARE, WE MUST BECOME

Elina - I don't understand!

Form - you have become, the mother has become, the father has become, we must become

Elina - What are you?

Form - We are

Elina - What?! We are what? you just say "we are" and ... then ... nothing. :doh:
-----------------------------------

Satnak - Should we be worried?

Serene - One more minute.

Terra - Hand me the red ribbons they go great in her hair.

Lisa - :rolleyes:

Elina - Huh?! wha? MOM!

Terra - Oh come on you look adorable.

Elina - But this is serious.

Serene - Exactly why we have to lighten the mood any way we can. Using Satnak for a game of horshoes is only funny the first six times.

Satnak - Consider yourself lucky, they started with me.

Satnak's normally mid-length straight brown hair, has been transformed into a single long braid.

Serene - I have a couple of outfits that work with this, barmaid and Valkyrie.

Terra - (looks at Lisa) :schemes:

Lisa - Ok getting a little adult here.

Serene - Sorry heh..heh

Elina - There is no-one in there.

Lisa & Terra - :confused:

Serene - :eek:

Satnak - ...

Elina - The motes I sensed are too pure, parts of someone. They are conglomerate, moving shifting, asserting dominance over each other. They are actively trying to become...

Serene - Become what? What are my children trying to become.

Elina - You misunderstand, they are not your children. The motes are seperate, but not individual. They are trying to become a person. I don't know what seperating the motes would do, or even if seperating them physically would stop the combining of the soul-motes. I suggest we continue to monitor for a while longer before making a decision, but I think for now its best we let things run their course for now.
------------------------

OOC: For the last friggin time d' is dragon mark ( or legacy clan in Satnak's realm ) ir' is royalty/nobility! *anime blood vessel tick*

13 - Booyeah, go 13, go 13, it's about to pop, it's about to pop:D

OOC: Oh I forgot to mention this when I posted it, but Kale wrote the bit with Tirmek and Sa'vor. I'm gonna go back and give credit, but I felt a formal apology was necessary. Sorry man.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-25-06, 07:55 AM		Elina - You misunderstand, they are not your children. The motes are seperate, but not individual. They are trying to become a person. I don't know what seperating the motes would do, or even if seperating them physically would stop the combining of the soul-motes. I suggest we continue to monitor for a while longer before making a decision, but I think for now its best we let things run their course for now.
Silver: Oh, is that all? :D

Bunny: So you're not mad? :confused:

Silver: Heck no! :P That's a perfectly legitimate method of gestation. Remember that P/Y/R used to be three beings.
********
Finally the Evard's Black Tentacles falls unconcious due to the barrage of questions. The fairy shrugs and enters the central chamber. Again it's not much, but it has a raised daius in the center unpon which sits an underwear golem with a towel wrapped around its head. It seem lost in meditation (as much as one can tell with an underwear golem).

Fairy: Excuse me—

(comical Indian accent): What is it, oh fast-talking one? Yes, I know you have a question for the great Wishywashy. I have spent years down here seeking the true state of conciousness, and thus I have insight into all minds.

Fairy: :mymy: (i.h.h. Wow, how's it do that?) Um, well, great mystical Wishywashy, there's this entity I need to meet—

Wishywashy: Say no more. I know the one which you seek: The Bunny. Yes, it is often that I have heard tales of this one that appears at the moment of death. I do know of it, one could say.

Fairy: Well, then where—

Wishywashy: You must seek the path of Ascention.

Fairy: ………………………A little more informaiton, maybe?

Wishywashy: In my hightened state of conciousness I have sensed the ability of those who have Ascended to percieve The Bunny more than just at a moment of death. I have even heard tales that The Bunny reveals to them the secrets of death.

Fairy: Yeah, but, I don't know how to "Ascend", or whatever it is.

Wishywashy: I do not know how one Ascends, for I have no desire for the things of this material realm. I seek only the highest state of conciousness. You shall have to discover that path on your own.
urial angel of death

10-25-06, 08:50 AM		OOC: And now, something to distract from the debate over morality that shouldn't even have come up. BTW, the whole thing is neutral at worst. That's all I'm gonna say. If you want to disagree with me, urial, please don't do so on the thread. PMing or calling me is so much less intrusive to the rest of those trying to enjoy a HUMOR thread with elements of DRAMA such as the following. I'm not trying to single you out, several of us have done it. You just happen to be the one violating the Karmic nature of this thread at the time.

IC:

Voice: Accursed poison...

*somewhere in the cosmos, a 20 is rolled on his Fortitude save*

Tirmek: :mad: Dammit. It still won't save you from another dose.

Voice: If you even get the opportunity, consider yourself lucky.

Tirmek attempts to ensnare him with is chain again, but his movements have slowed considerably from the damage. Voice grabs the chain and swings Tirmek into another wall. A blur goes by, grabbing Tirmek before impact.

Voice: Another one? So many fools today.

Sarah: *from the darkness* Sticks and stones, little man. Sticks and stones...

As she bursts from the shadows, he sees her eyes are blood red. A look of malevolent joy is plastered on her face. As she closes in, he steps aside, landing a blow across her face. Righting herself, she comes at Voice again, leaping up towards the ceiling. She crests right in front of him, and he times his strike to use her own momentum in the blow. However, he misses badly when Sarah pushes off the ceiling and lands beneath him. The pain in his gut from her sucker punch nearly knocks the wind out of him as he stumbles back and tries a counter.

Voice: (i.h.h.) The Rakshasa child has worn me down. This girl seems at least on par with him...

She flips over his kick and rushes him. He simply falls backward, kicking up as Sarah passes over him. It catches her in the chest, allowing him a moment to right himself as she recovers.

Sarah: Don't stop now, ego boy. I'm just starting to enjoy this! RRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAGGHHHH!!!!

Voice: :eek: Oh cra-! *KRAPOW*

The wall splinters and shatters as he passes through it, barely managing to get into a roll and coming to a stop on his feet. Looking back through the hole, he can see Sarah in the dim light. That joyful grin was really getting on his nerves, but...those eyes, they seemed to glow. Calling this girl overpowered was an understatement. She is an abomination!

Sarah: Seems you're not all you're cracked up to be... How disappointing.

Three images of Sarah took the place of one. One went left, another right, and the third remained where it was. He could hear all three of them, but he knew where the original was. The one in front came at him first. This one was merely a distraction. It passed through him harmlessly. The two at his sides attacked in tandem, and he struck out with a kick to the left one-

Tirmek: (i.h.h.) Keeping her wits while berzerked. She is a most frigtening girl...

-and hits nothing. Midway though the motion, the real Sarah appears from behind him. A loud crunch followed by screaming is heard throughout the room as she crushes his exposed hip joint. Before he even hits the ground, Sarah grabs his arm and swings him through another wall.

Sarah: *in pursuit* Fight back! It's no fun when it's one sided! :devil:

Voice lands on his good leg, shrugging off the pain in his shattered hip as best he can. The child is on him before he can breathe, bowling him over as she bites his ear. Tearing her and part of his ear off, he pulls a German Suplex, slamming Sarah headfirst into the floor. She flops to the side, unconscious. He then stands up, wincing terribly.

Voice: *pant* Such annoyances. No wonder they beat Izzy... She'll be out for a while. Time to finish of the other brat. *pant*

He turns to look for Tirmek, only to find the boy standing by the hole in the wall. He still appears somewhat tipsy from the battle, but it really doesn't detract from the look of malice on his face.

Tirmek: I'll have you know...I am very put out.

Sarah: Ah hah...ha ha ha hahahaha!!!

Voice turns to look at her in disbelief. She stood up, wiping blood from her mouth. That damned smile was still on her face!

Sarah: That's what I'm talking about! Too bad it has to end.

OOC: Ok, I'm done for now. All three are hurting pretty good after this. I'll let urial or rampant take it from here.

OOC: That was great except for the fact that Adam lacks ears. I'll work on the conclusion later.
Gladius_Lucix

10-25-06, 09:43 AM		Liam: ...And done with this one. Sparky, Swarm, let's move on to the last one.

Sparky: That was a lot quicker than the last one.

Liam: Well, before this, I'd only ever made two or three before, and never on the same day. I'm getting the knack of it now. Where's the last one supposed to go?

Sparky: Right over here.

Swarm: Let's get this done quickly. Ash is waiting on a Weirsan reciever adapted to psionic energy.

Liam: Joyful. Alright, hand me that wrench...

----
OOC: I'll get to it. Real world is getting in the way a bit.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-25-06, 11:03 AM		OOC: That was great except for the fact that Adam lacks ears.
OOC: Yeah, but I really couldn't think of a better way to put it other than that. Maybe "sense" or "feel" them would have been better, but with what the doubles are, it wouldn't have made as much sense. Thanks, though.

And remember: DON'T QUOTE LONG POSTS IN THEIR ENTIRETY, PLEASE! :P :D

And YAY! Gladius isn't dead! :w00t:

EDIT: I just figured out what you were talking about. Nevermind :embarrass. She was just biting at his head, hoping to hit some vital point. It still works if you think about it that way.
Norr

10-25-06, 11:46 AM		OOCNorr: Yes, I meant that disturbing... almost... *shudder*. Complete with the groans of wood, pain and pleasure :P, remember Kanatash provided the return ticket. I thought 'birthing' Krozen back to home a suitably disturbing mental image.

OOC: Based on his experiences with the FF, I figured Krozen would want as little as possible to do with it, so the note serves a dual purpose. Poining out that Jaela the pontiff is on board would run contrary to his interests, since the church would want to get her back from there. Feel free to ignore that post if it doesn't suit the plot.

--
The squirrel thing scurried along the corridors rafters. He'd slowed his pace now, and climbing was more silent than flying. It had taken a while to find his way back to the crate-room, but he thought it might be worth the while. Fool! He did the same mistake every time he found a new odd tenant, rushing back to the nest. Coward! As if them on the top decks would care, the things down here were never a threat to them, never will be. The only pest-control they do down here is for sport!
...which is not to say it isn't appreciated...
Now that the vampire doesn't hunt the Deep Bowels anymore, had to take on the mantle of pest control, taking on things that would upset the balance of this sunless realm.
At least now he got his gear. The trip back to the nest had not been a complete waste of time.
While his body managed his locomotion, he mused about this place of darkness and his role in it. He was a bit of a coward, he knew that, but he was an ambush predator. Quick and agile, but otherwise small and weak.
A wise man once said, "The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown". Even though the squirell thing wasn't much of a 'mankind' himself, he'd often thought of those lines, and wished hard as khyber for a library.

When he came upon the room of crates, he stopped and investigated the spot where the ape thing had got his bucket kicked. Nothing but a bit of dust, which was slowly being absorbed by the varnish of the floor. No trail.
The squirrel thing skittered around the room for a minute or two and discovered a crate built into the wall, it's side hanging slightly ajar. Inside was a room with something resembling a tangle of large sleeping spaghetti. Odd.
The squirrel thing skittered up on top of one of the boxes and waited, he'd lost his quarrys trail anyway, so he might as well see if anything interesting would happen here.

OOC: The squirrel things initial attitude is usually a catious indifference. He's very stealthy and prefers stalking things to confronting them, though hopes he never has to. He's very fast however, and can outfly most things if something goes banana shaped.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-25-06, 01:14 PM		Way back when

Squirrel: Chirp. Chirrup, rup chiruppen.

Terra: You're kidding...

Zella: What?

Terra: I don't know how to tell you this, but...Rose and Achika have been...um...kidnapped.

Zella: :headexplo SAY WHAT?!?!

Terra: :eek: It was Prince Boranal the Foppish! How was I supposed to know he'd strike while we were :blush: indisposed?

Zella: :mad: Getting kidnapped is MY schtik!

Terra: Calm down! If it'll make you feel better...we'll play Kidnap the Princess once we're done getting them back.

Zella: *humph* ...it better be an extremely daring rescue followed by amazing sex.

Terra: I'll put my heart into it. :schemes:

Zella: :blush: Fine. What should we do first? I'm usually on the other end of the rescuing bit.

Terra: I have an idea of where they've taken Rose. Boranal has a place called The Pit of Despair where he takes people who have upset him to be tortured. Apparently, the Count likes to test new inventions down there.

Zella: And you know how to get there?

Terra: Generally, yes. The entrance is hidden, but since it's in a forest, I should be able to locate it fairly easily.

Zella: What about Achika?

Terra: She's likely been taken back to Boranal's castle. We'll need Rose's help to sneak in and get her out. We don't have a lot of options on such short notice.

*elsewhere*

In a slum of war refugees somewhere in Breland, Jarlot (now normal size) is completely drunk. Prince Boranal the Foppish gave orders to have the camp emptied before his wedding to Achika in two days, but Jarlot refuses to move.

Jarlot: I am waiting for you, Merrix! You told me to go back to the begginning! ...so I have. This is where I am! And this is where I will stay! I will not be moved! *big swig of booze*

Guard: Ho there!

Jarlot: I do not budge...keep your "Ho there".

Guard: The Prince gave orders!

Jarlot swings his sword at the guard, backing him up.

Jarlot: So did Merrix. When a job went wrong, you went back to the beginning. And this is where we got the job. So it's the beginning, and I'm staying till Merrix comes.

Guard: You! Brute! Come here!

Jarlot: *tipsily* I...am...waiting...for...Merrix...

???: You surely are a meanie.

Stupid THX-1138 punches out the guard, and is quickly followed by a familiar looking red-headed Necromancer.

Jarlot: It's you!

Andrea: True!

She helps him up.

Andrea: You don't look so good...

Jarlot: *non-chalantly* Pfffff.

Andrea: :ahem: You don't smell so good either.

Jarlot: Perhaps not. I feel fine...

Andrea: Yeah?

She lets go if him and he promptly passes out, falling flat on his face.

OOC: Hope you like this turn of event's, Charles. I wanted to fit Andrea in here somewhere, and we just couldn't leave Jarlot alone. I look forward to seeing how they'll rescue Rose (in whatever condition he's in :D ).
rwarner3701

10-25-06, 01:48 PM		Jarlot: She hails from Karrnath, 6'2, favorite book is the Necronomicron, likes tennis, dislikes turn undead abilities, has no current boyfriend, and is a Duchess that's 2nd in line for the throne when we disregard the 90 or so undead members of the Royal Family. Andrea D'Glycine!


Norbaz: :weep:
Charles Phipps

10-25-06, 01:51 PM		OOC: Jarlot is just jealous.

And another good bit Kaizer! Can't wait for Miracle Max.
rampant

10-25-06, 02:11 PM		OOC: Dont'cha mean Miracle Micky?:D
--------------------------------

Tirmek - 3..2..1..

Voice - What are you going on about nhigik!

Tirmek - Every time you touched me, every time i so much as nicked you.

Sarah - RAAHHH
Kaizer_Ryu

10-25-06, 02:15 PM		OOC: Dont'cha mean Miracle Micky?:D
OOC: I actually have a much better idea than Micky. :devil:

I have to wait till Rose is pulled out of the Pit, though. He'll only be mostly dead. :evillaugh
Charles Phipps

10-25-06, 03:16 PM		Rose:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHH!

Count Aaren D'Cannith: Huh, he died quickly.

Igor: You didn't even turn the machine on. You were just priming it.

Count D'Cannith: Spoony bard.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-25-06, 03:21 PM		Terra: I'll put my heart into it. :schemes:
Silver: I never heard of that method.

OOKaizer: You're deliberately misreading it!
*******
And now for something completely different…………

A guy who looks like Rose swings down on a rope from the rafters of Erk's place and lands with a flourish. He wears rediculously distracting swashbuckler clothes complete with a wide hat and large feather.

NJ26: :censored: Not another one.

Alt-Rose: I am…………………(attempts to draw rapier but gets only the hilt)…………EL SPOOÑO!
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-25-06, 03:59 PM		Ash "Ah, Captain Rose, Cigar? I beleve thats the custum for new fathers."

Rose "How do I know it wont explode?"

Ash "Its a cleshay." shrugs "There the very finest, I order them from Zilargo." produces a case and lights one with a thought, proffering it to rose.

Rose "Sure, thank you" takes one, ash patting him on the back, leaving, unnotised a strip of sand paper attacjed to Rose's back. Rose haeds into his cabin. Ash finds Chalcky and Pholli wating near by expectantly.

Ash "Mission acomplished, he should be sitting down about... now. The sand paper will rub against the match, witch will burn through the string releasing the baloon"

Pholli "Then the baloon floats into the rafters, bursts on the pin" [eager] they hear a soft pop from Rose's cabin.

Chaulky "Wich starts the rat in the wheel running, rasing the hatch so the Bouling ball can start down its slide.-"

Ash "About now it shoud be bouncing off Rose's head" listens for a yell of pain. "Good, and into the counterweight for the trap door droping him into the room beneath."

Pholli "Where the prototype is, he'll hear and smell the fine mist of reagents in the air-" [eager]

Chalky "But in the dark He'll strike a match- He does have one?"

Ash "The cigars have one inside there wrapper, striking surface too."

Pholi "So the Fuel air mix will be ignighting about now-" The air is torn with a teriffig eruption of pure white flame and a concusave shokwave, as every door and window in rose's quarters is blown out and Rose himself is poropelled stright up through the roof like a firework on a pillar of incandesant light.

Ash "So that works" [smug and impressed] "What did you call it?"

Pholli "Fuel air explosave, just some distiled naptha vapor and a spark, I sued to work at a mill, same thing happens with flower dust, didnt think it would burn that bright."

Chaulky "Ah, I added Magnesium dust using a paint bomb." Ash high fives him.

N+15: Any and all permutations of the words 'Air' 'Explosave' and 'Fuel' is now anned from the ship. I mean it this time!
N +16: Ash is herafter forbidden from the rooms under my cabin, on pain of super cooled keelhawling.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-25-06, 04:21 PM		Way back when

Andrea: Why the sudden obsession with breaking into the castle?

Jarlot: Boranal owes me a fifty! What other reason do I need?

Andrea: *groan* You're still mad about what he did to you in college, aren't you?

Jarlot: :mad: I asked you never to speak of that again!

Andrea: *sigh* Fine. But the castle gate is guarded by thirty level 2 fighters.

Jarlot: How many could you take?

Andrea: With the resources at hand...I don't think more than 8. Stupid might be able to handle another 10, but...

Jarlot: *does the math on his hands* Leaving 12 for me. At my best I could never defeat that many... I need Merrix to plan, I have no gift for strategy...

Andrea: But Merrix is dead.

Jarlot: *has an epiphany* ...no, not Merrix. I need the Spoony Bard and the Woman in Black.

Andrea: Wha...?

Jarlot: She bested Spoony with steel, he bested me with strength, they must have out-thought Merrix. And people who can do that can plan a castle onslaught anyday.

Andrea: But you don't know where they are!

Jarlot: Don't bother me with trifles! After twenty years my score will be settled! There will be a pantsing tonight! :devil:

(later)

From somewhere in the distance, Rose's screaming can be heard as Jarlot, Andrea, and Stupid wander through a crowded market.

Jarlot: Do you hear that? That is the sound of ultimate suffering. My heart made that sound when the Rakshasa killed Halester...the Spoony Bard makes it now.

Andrea: The Spoony Bard?

Jarlot: His true love is marrying another tonight, who else has the cause for ultimate suffering? *begins pushing through the crown* Excuse me-oof! Pardo-urhg... Stupid if you would.

Stupid: *ROLLS A 20 ON HIS INTIMIDATION CHECK* EVERYBODY MOOOOOOVVVEEEE!!!!!

The crowd parts.

Jarlot: Thank you, Stupid.

(later, in a nearby forest)

Terra: Where is Rose?

Igor: *holding a wheelbarrow* I cannot thay, mith.

Zella: You get there from this grove, right?

Igor: *thilenthe* (Hint: read it as if Igor was saying it)

Terra: *sigh* We're not getting anywhe-

Andrea: Stupid, jog his memory.

*thunk* Igor falls to the ground, unconscious.

Stupid: Sorry, Andrea. I didn't mean to jog him so hard.

Zella: The hell?!

Jarlot: Oh, it's you again.

Terra: We're a bit busy right now. We don't have time to deal with you.

Jarlot: You're actually the one I was hoping to find. We need your help. Where's Spoony?

Zella: We're looking for him too. But you just knocked out our only lead.

All this time, Andrea continues to stare at Terra.

Terra: What?

Andrea: Oh, you just remind me of someone. Nevermind.

Terra: I've gotten that a lot, lately.

Zella: What do we do now?

Terra: Give me a moment...

Concentrating for a moment, Terra listens to the forest floor. She then heads off, the rest of the group following closely behind.

Zella: Why are you coming too?

Jarlot: Like I said, we need your help. I think our goals coincide.

OOC: Ok, Charles. I'll let you do the bit where they get Rose out of the Pit. If you want, you can do the Miracle Max part, too. If you do, please use my idea :bigeyes: .
rampant

10-25-06, 04:55 PM		Satnak - Look Serene, we need to talk.

Serene - Your right, I'm sorry i got all righteous about-

Satnak - Don't apologize for that. You did what you felt was right. If Elina had found something besides what she did I would have thrown my self on the operating table and started cutting myself.

Serene - Silly girl:)

Satnak - I know this still bothers you.

Serene - Its just well it seems cruel. Already my child is fighting to define itself.

Satnak - Our child will be fine. This struggle is simply the process everyone goes through, for my people its simply more literal.

Serene - I guess.

Satnak - Anyway we also need to discuss a few other things.

Serene - Like what?

Satnak - Where are we gonna raise this kid? and all of the little ones that come after?

Serene - Whats wrong with what we do now?

Satnak - Bouncing between your Room and my quarters?

Serene - Yeah.

Satnak - Might need to get a nursery installed in your place.

Serene - Daddy is already taking care of that.

Satnak - Ok fine, schooling?

Serene - Well Daddy would prefer to train any who carry sorcerous potencial himself. The island is a bit... overcompetitive for my tastes, but it seems to be doing wonders for Elina and Sarah. Not to mention you. *nibble's Satnak's ear* MMMmmmmmm Satnak.

Satnak - :embarrass What about money? The only reason I can afford putting Elina and Sarah is a reserve I've been building up for years. I just don't have the cash to put another one through.

Serene - I'm royalty, and so are you now, we don't need to worry.

Satnak - I don't think I'm comfortable asking for your father to help put our children through school.

Serene - Silly girl, would you have trouble asking your grammy?

Satnak - Yes, She's well off for a troll, but thats a small dime in a big bucket. Cousin Zigen is in on a list of scholarships so obscure I'm convinced he made half of them up.

Serene - Hahahaha! No what I meant was is it because its my Dad or because you don't feel comfortable asking for help?

Satnak - Mostly, because he's Terrek.

Serene - Silly girl:) Get used to it. He's in your family now to.

Satnak - :P

Serene - Is that an invitation?:schemes:
Charles Phipps

10-25-06, 05:42 PM		In the Pit

*Jarlot puts his head to the Spoony Bard's chest*

Jarlot: He's dead.

***

Sarah and Elin's bedroom

Sarah: What do you mean he's dead!?

Elin: You don't mean dead dead do you?

Bullet Tooth Tony: *looks up from 'The Spoony's Bride'* Listen, whose telling the story here?

Elin: But he's alive right now!?

Bullet Tooth Tony: Could be a retcon.

*The two girls stare in horror*

Sarah: Who kills Boranal?

Elin: YEAH!

Bullet Tooth Tony:Well he lives.

Elin: HE WINS!?

Sarah: BBT, why did you tell us this story to cheer us up while we're sick!

Bullet Tooth Tony: Listen you're taking this story very seriously...

Elin: No no! Please continue!

***

Jarlot: Do you have any money?

Andrea: I have a little from a lifetime of cheating my paramours.

Jarlot: Let's hope it's enough to buy a miracle.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-25-06, 08:07 PM		Way back when

Terra: You're not coming?

Jarlot: *humph* I have my reasons...

Terra: Whatever.

Andrea: I think I'll stay here too. Here's the 65, maybe it'll be enough.

The group stands near a cottage on the outskirts of town. Stupid carries Rose as Jarlot refuses to come within 500 feet of the cottage. Terra walks up to the door and knocks loudly.

Man's Voice: *from inside* Go away!

She continues knocking till a small window opens in the door and a strangely familiar old man peers through.

Old Man: What, what?

Terra: Are you the Miracle Max who worked for the King all those years?

Miracle Max: The King's stinking son fired me. And thank you so much for bringing up such a painful memory. While you're at it, why not give me a nice papercut and pour lemon juice on it?! We're closed! *shuts the window*

Zella now starts beating on the door.

Miracle Max: *reopens the window* Beat it or I'll call the Brute Squad!

Stupid: I'm on the Brute Squad.

Miracle Max: :mymy: You are the Brute Squad.

Zella: We need a miracle, it's very improtant.

Miracle Max: Look, I'm retired. And besides, why would you want someone the King's stinking son fired? I might kill whoever you wanted me to miracle!

Terra: He's already dead...

Miracle Max: He is, eh? ...I'll take a look. Bring him in.

They enter and Stupid lays Rose out on the table. Max lifts up Rose's arm and lets go. It flops back onto the table, lifeless.

Miracle Max: I've seen worse.

He checks Rose here and there as Zella gets a bit antsy.

Zella: Sir...*he looks up* Please, we're in a terrible rush.

Miracle Max: Don't rush me, sweet cheeks. You rush a miracle man, you get rotten miracles. You got money?

Terra: 65.

Miracle Max: Sheesh! I never work for so little. Except once. And that was for a very noble cause.

Zella: This is noble, sir. His love is being held hostage and being forced to marry another as we speak.

Miracle Max: Riiiight...

Zella: I need him to rescue me every so often to keep the benefits of my Prestige Class.

Miracle Max: Your first story was better. *grabs the bellows* Well, I'll ask him.

Zella: :confused: He's dead. He can't talk...

Miracle Max: Ooo ho hoo. Look who knows so much! Well, it just so happens that your friend here is only mostly...dead. There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Please open his mouth. *Zella does so* Now, mostly dead *begins working the bellow* he's slightly alive. All dead...well, with all dead, there's usually only one thing that you can do.

Zella: What's that?

Miracle Max: Go through his clothes and look for loose change. *stops pumping, Rose's lungs are full of air* *next to Rose's ear* Hey! Hello in there! Hey! What's so important! What'cha got here that's worth living for? *pushed on Rose's chest*

Rose: Tru....ue....loo...oveeee....

Zella: You heard him! He said true love! You could not ask for a more noble cause than that.

Miracle Max: Honey, true love is the greatest thing...in the world. Except for a nice MLT, a mutton, lettuce and tomato sandwich, where the mutton is nice and lean and the tomato is ripe. :drool: They're so perky, I love that. But that's not what he said. He distinctly said "to blave." And, as we all know, "to blave" means "to bluff." So you're probably playing cards, and he cheated-!

Woman's voice: LIAR! LIAR!!!! LIIIAAAAAAARRRR!!!!!

An older woman comes running out.

Miracle Max: *panicky* Get back witch!

Old Woman: I'm not a witch, I'm your wife! And after what you just said, I'm not even sure I wanna be that anymore!

Miracle Max: :mad: You never had it so good.

Old Woman: "True love." He said, "true love," Murphy! Holy Me-

Murphy Jarlot: Not another word, Valerie!

Valerie: *to Terra and Zella* He's afraid. Ever since Prince Boranal fired him, his confidence is shattered.

Murphy: Why did you say that name! You promised me you would never say that name!

Valerie: What? Boranal? *Murphy cringes* Boranal. *same* Boranal! *begins chasing him* Boranal Boranal Boranal!!!!!!

Murphy: *covering his ears* I'm not listening!!! *she continues* Nobody's hearing nothin'!

Terra: :lightbulb If you heal him, he will stop Boranal's wedding!

Murphy: *to Valerie* Shut up! *to Terra* I heal him, Boranal suffers?

Terra: :devil: Humiliations galore...

Murphy: Muahahaha...That is a noble cause. Gimmie the 65. I'm on the job!

OOC: Ok, that's really long. I'll do the rest in a bit. Unless Charles wants to do it.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-25-06, 08:54 PM		Bunny: Hey! No one can be "mostly" dead. Dead is a single, unreplicatable state that only occurs in whole portions. I mean, I should know.
Charles Phipps

10-25-06, 09:06 PM		Cleric: That depends, does he have any experience levels? Does he have a high enough constitution score for resurrection?
rampant

10-25-06, 09:48 PM		Voice - Higik

Tirmek - Its a weak paralysis (read 1 or 2 points of dex damage) poison that stays in you for days. You'll be twitching and cramping for a week at this rate. Not to mention the effects this will have on your digestive track. You're gonna need alot of fiber.

Voice - I hate smart asses *lunge*

Tirmek - *checks his nails*

Sarah - *dives into Voice from behind*

The two stop just at Tirmek's feet.

Tirmek - Want a hand up?

Tirmek extends one hand, retracting the thorns on it as he does so, and pulls Sarah to her feet. Conveiniently said feat are now on Voice's head.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-25-06, 09:55 PM		Way back when

Part 2:

Murphy and Valerie put the finishing touches on the miracle pill. By which I mean they cover it in chocolate.

Zella: That's a miracle pill?

Terra: Chocolate coating makes it go down easier.

Valerie: You'll have to wait 15 minutes for full potentcy. And he shouldn't go swimming for at least, what...?

Murphy: An hour.

Valerie: Yeah, a good hour. *hands over the pill*

Terra: Thank you for everything.

The couple sees them off at the door.

Valerie: Jarlot!

Jarlot: *hiding behind a bush* Dammit...

Valerie: Would it kill you to write your dear old mother every so often? I miss you, honey!

-----

Elin: Does that mean that Valerie is Khyber in disguise?

Sara: How does that work?

B.T. Tony: Admiral Jarlot always said she was a nice lady...

-----

Jarlot leaves the bushes with Andrea following closely behind, leaves clinging to her hair.

Murphy: :D That's my boy! No opportunity wasted!

Jarlot: *groan* Let's go...

The group starts moving off.

Valerie: Bye bye, girls!

Murphy: Have fun stormin' the castle!

Valerie: *to Murphy* Think it'll work?

Murphy: It would take a miracle. *cheerfully to the group* Bye!

Terra: Was it really necessary to do that?

Andrea: :embarrass What? You were taking so long, we got bored.

Terra: Well, I can't say I wouldn't have done the same if it was me out here with you... ;) :devil:

Andrea: :blush: :blush: :blush:

Zella: :mad: *THUNK*

Terra: Ow... Oh, come on. I was kidding...
urial angel of death

10-25-06, 10:22 PM		Volrath: That isn't how I remember it happening.

Elina: You weren't their uncle.

Volrath: Yes I was. I was always there

*montage of images showing Volrath crudely pasted into the way long ago sceens*

Volrath: If I remember correctly your mother, never scored with Zella. All she could do was spout pick-up lines that sounded like they came from a lonely guy in his early twenties. You *looks at B.B.T.* have got the whole story wrong.

-------

Flashes to screen of the party about to storm the castle. Zella is standing on the bridge's edge.

Zella: My boyfriend doesn't love me, I'm constantly kidnapped and I only recieve attention from people that think all elves are easy.

Andrea: Well if you're going to kill yourself hurry up about it

Terra: You know if you're going to die any way... ;)

Zella: No way!

Terra: I guess I'l just have to fish your body out of the river then.

Zella: :mymy: Getting down now.

--------

present day.

Volrath: *head is smashed by multiple hammers.

OOC: I will get to the fight first thing tomorrow. I have something big planned. Sorry for taking so long.
rampant

10-25-06, 10:29 PM		OOC: Good, I don't know how long you can breathe with a mouthful of boot, but I bet it's not long.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-25-06, 10:43 PM		OOC: Good, I don't know how long you can breathe with a mouthful of boot, but I bet it's not long.
:heehee Believe me, I've been poking at him with a big, pointy stick for some time. I only stopped that one time he started passing out from blood loss.

*poke* *poke* *poke*

OOUrial: :mad: I said I was getting to it tomorrow!

OOKaizer: :P Not fast enough.

*poke* *poke*

OORampant: Move over. Mine has splinters and itch powder.

OOUrial: :mymy:
rampant

10-25-06, 11:08 PM		Chalky - I just had a horrible thought.

Pholly - What?

Chalky - We're the heroes.

Ash - ... I need to lie down.
---------------------------------

Old squishy - Ok kids how many things are wrong with this sequence.

Teiza - More than I can count.

Korre - Normally I'd make a snide remark about the answer being 4 at this point, but frankly I need to lie down.
Norr

10-26-06, 07:57 AM		N+17: Casting Grease on your monkey familiar will not grant you a +2 on engineering checks.
N+18: No Barbaria is to shout "by the power of Grayskull!" to start raging.
N+19: This also applies to Frenzied berserkers.
N+20: And magicians casting Tensers Transformation.
N+21: Even if Nerull is your patron Deity.
N+22: Or the Keeper.
N+23: If you do, you will have serious issues with the Paladin.
N+24: No, Marish does not have a mummified Arch-enemy named Mumm-Rah.
N+25: There is no Gotham.
N+26: Even if it were, it would not be populated by swineherds.
N+27: None of which would be the secret heir to the throne.
N+28: Even if he would do a better job than Boranel.
N+29: No, I do not live in Gotham.
N+30: There is no such place.
N+31: No, Batman is not a swineherd.
N+32: There is no Batman.
N+33: NO, Batman is NOT the true heir to Boranels throne.
N+34: Boranel is not 'the golden ass'.
N+35: He is not travelling the land looking for a rose of Arawai to cure his affliction.
N+36: His throne is not unoccupied.
N+37: No, you may not sit on it.
N+38: No, it's not because it's reserved for Batman.
N+39: Because there is no Batman dammit!
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-26-06, 08:00 AM		Welcome back to the first annual Forgotten Freedom Beauty Pageant

Jarlot walks on stage.

Jarlot: Thank you, thank you, I—(cartoon senses realize something is wrong. examines self.)……………………:mad: Okay, who put the double-button coat, wide-brimmed hat, and and simple bandanna mask on me? Not to mention this duck bill.
*******
In the shadows a dark figure lurks.

Dark-figure: I am the terror that pokes in the night. I am the pin that pops the bubble of your ego. I am……………………THORN, the Forky Bard!
Norr

10-26-06, 09:24 AM		After about half an hour of exciting dullness, the squirrel thing got bored. He secured his gear and prepared to scamper off.
Gladius_Lucix

10-26-06, 01:24 PM		Swarm: Liam, we need to get this done and go help Ash.

Liam: I'm working on it, Swarm. Hand me that wrench over there.

Swarm: Here.

Sparky: I've noticed that you've been putting it together differently each time.

Liam: This is a device that generates power from the combined energies of strange, weird, or insane creatures in the area. Uniformity is not conducive to proper operation.
Charles Phipps

10-26-06, 04:54 PM		OOC: Great post Noir.

and loved the Dark Wing duck reference Silver.
Charles Phipps

10-26-06, 05:14 PM		First Annual Forgotten Freedom Beauty Pageant

Part 4

Queen Aurala: It's certainly an exciting match up isn't it? We've had one whole contestant compete!

King Steve: This is the only way to find the Chosen Light Warriors that will save all of Galifar.

Princess Sarah Ir'Wynern: Uhhhh....this isn't the competition to find the Chosen Ones.

King Steve: It isn't? Hmmmm. Well, why not send them anyway. The strong will survive and the weak will perish.

Princess Sarah Ir'Wynern: Wouldn't that lead to the extinguishing of hundreds of innocent lives due to the fact they're mostly just attractive and dim maidens?

King Steve: You think it would work out that well?

Princess Sarah Ir'Wynern: Dad, are you still mad at mom leaving you?

King Steve: Women are all filthy *****bags. Now back to our contest.

Queen Aurala: Oh Steve. *giggle*

Jarlot: Our next contestant is a Druidess!

King Steve: Oh that reminds me. I have an environmental summit this afternoon. The druids are going to present me with an award for preserving the Eldeen Reaches.

Princess Sarah Ir'Wynern: Didn't you have 1000 miles of old growth trees slashed and burned?

King Steve: How else was I going to drill for dragonshards?

Princess Sarah Ir'Wynern: You don't DRILL for Dragonshards!

Queen Aurala: Wait, I can drill for dragonshards just by slashing and burning woodlands? That's brilliant! To think I was just making friends with all those beautiful woodland creatures before!

*turns to a group of Disneyland like animals nearby her*

Thumper: Queen Aurala?

Queen Aurala: Take them to be slaughtered and furried!

*camera goes back to the judges as sounds of horrible bloodshed and murder of cute critters commences with the splatter of blood*

Jarlot: Her name is Terra Branford and she's famous as a counter culture icon. Her hobbies include growing herbal narcotics for the masses, hot tentacle girl-on-girl action, witchcraft, raising her two children, and eco-terrorism.

*the slightly green skinned Terra walks out with spikey hair and a gown of leaves*

Queen Aurala: Oh my! But isn't sexuality a sin!

Jarlot: Ah yes, how I remember our relationship well. I can't imagine why I broke it off.

Queen Aurala: *prays* Oh mighty flame, forgive Jarlot for his blasphemous nature and when you consign him to Khyber's nightmarish damnation, remember that I was nice enough to pray for his poor damned soul.

Jarlot: And people wonder why I'm against the monarchy...

Princess Sarah: Miss Branford, you listed amongst your concerns the environment. Can you tell us your solution for the problems facing the Five Nations?

Terra Branford: Having met your father and finding out the Mourning was caused by the Last War's ineptness, my solution is a mass culling of the weak and inbred aristocracy that have caused the common people to be exploited for too long. Then I would burn the cities down with druidic fire from the skies followed by masses of dire animals slaughtering the upper class to only lead the strong and virile members of the race that have been enslaved too long.

King Steve: Splendid! Let's get right on that. Except we'll replace upper class and aristocrats with "people who don't have money." Plus, we'll substitute cities for "worthless farmers."

Queen Aurala: Oooo I like that! Except, it needs to be more cute! Can we put theme parks over the farm lands?

King Steve: That'll improve tourism! We'll also make it too expensive for the poor to visit.

Terra Branford: GRRrrrrrrrrrrr....

Princess Sarah: This is just like what happened with my brother.

King Steve: And if you don't want to join him in the gulag....errr I mean his Summer Camp....you'd be well to remember that Sarah.

Terra: DARKNESS BEYOND TWILIGHT, CRIMSON BEYOND BLOOD THAT FLOWS, BURIED IN THE STREAM OF TIME IS WHERE YOUR POWER GROWS....

Jarlot: And as Terra prepares to bring down unholy wrath upon us, we'll switch now to images of her skyclad as her swimsuit entry.

Ketler: OH GOD! MY EYES! THE TENTACLES!
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-26-06, 05:19 PM		Jarlot: And as Terra prepares to bring down unholy wrath upon us, we'll switch now to images of her skyclad as her swimsuit entry.
Silver: Told you we'd need those.
Ketler: OH GOD! MY EYES! THE TENTACLES!
13: Yes, they came in handy.

Ketler: SOMEONE PLEASE KILL ME!

Bunny: I like this arrangement. :devil:
rampant

10-26-06, 05:50 PM		Bunny - *ping* dammit!

Silver - Huh?

Bunny - Bloodlust just bit the dust.

13 - Huh?

Bunny - You know the whole soul shard thing with Satnak's kid?

Silver - Yeah

Bunny - Bloodlust just got jumped by Willpower.

Silver - Since the first shards absorbed have the least affect on the child, your miffed that you won't be seeing a psychotic killing machine with Terrek's super powers and Satnak's near unlimited potencial.

Bunny - Damned right I'm ******.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-26-06, 05:52 PM		Chalky - I just had a horrible thought.

Pholly - What?

Chalky -We're the heroes.

Ash - ... I need to lie down.


Ash "Forget the lie down, you mean hurting Rose makes us heroes?..:plotting: "oh spooooonyyyyyy" :mage:
rampant

10-26-06, 05:59 PM		Chalky - Not quite what I meant, but I like where you're going.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-26-06, 06:10 PM		Ash "So what did you mean? Hmmm, how to hurt Rose next..." :plotting:

Pholly "Why dont you like him any way?"

Ash "He suffers from a misguided sense of competance and what in any other case would be delusions of Grandure, but even then he mearly attains misaprehensions of adaquacy"
rampant

10-26-06, 06:26 PM		Chalky - I meant the crew of the FF, we are the heroes of this realm. We destroy, one way or another, all who are worse than we are. uber dieties, dealkyr, rapists, and worst of the lot politicians and pedophiles. Which begs the question why is ketler not dead?
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-26-06, 06:30 PM		Chalky - …Which begs the question why is ketler not dead?
13: Because he's too much fun to torture.
urial angel of death

10-26-06, 07:32 PM		Adam disappears from under Sarah's very spiky boots. He then reappears behind the two.

Voice: I guess I can't defeat you normally. I'll have to use my powers. Little children did you know that each chosen gets power over one primary force of the universe. Satnak has soul, Izzy has an albiet incomplete control of void as of yet, and I have control of time.

Tirmek: Oh ****!

Voice: Reverse personal temperal field. *All of Adam's wounds heal and his bones reposition*

Tirmek: The poison isn't of much use is it.

Voice: Afraid not.

Voice: devolution Adam's body twists and reverses thousands of years of evolution. He growths monsterous claws, scale-like skin, and a musclular tail.
---------
In the realm of entities

OOUrial: Take that Darwin!

OOKaizer: You know that theory was disproved years ago, right?

OOUrial: Minions!

OOKaizer: No don't take me away! I'll be good!

Hades and Pestilence appear behind OOKaizer and drag him away kicking and screaming.
---------
Tirmek swings his spiked chain at Adam's still unmoving form. Adam simply raises his arm and catches the chain.

Voice: Accelerated aging

The chain immediately rusts and disentigrates.

Voice: You're next! *runs at Tirmek*

Sarah lands a flying jump kick on Adam's head, sending him into the wall.

Sarah: Stay away from my boyfriend!

Voice: Stop interfering! *places hands on floor* Accelerated aging

The floor under them turns grey, rots, and putrifies in a matter of seconds. It then collapses under them and they fall into the sky below...
Charles Phipps

10-26-06, 10:06 PM		OOC: And yes, if anyone is asking.

Steve is a combination of 8bit's King Steve, King Boranal, and the current President of the United States.

Sadly, the deaths of so many of the Ir'Wynarn line by our groups hands has put the original King Boranal's demented third cousin once removed on the throne.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-26-06, 10:32 PM		OOC: You know what scares me the most? Terra has the distinct potential to become Queen of Thrane. She, Sarah, and Elina are technically princesses of the country. Since (Princess) Lisa is Queen Diani's only daughter ( ;) ), that makes her next in line for the throne. Of course, all this rides on whether or not Lisa wants to rule Thrane...

I wonder how Volrath would react. On the one hand, Terra would be Queen of Thrane. On the other hand, Terra would be Queen of Thrane and have the power to crush the infidels in a completely legal way. On the other, other hand, Lisa would be less than happy if she did that. On the other, other, other hand...

Bunny: So...are you messing with Volrath, Lisa, Terra, OOKaizer, or OOUrial with that conundrum?

13: Yes. :D
rampant

10-26-06, 10:34 PM		Tirmek - *dispel avatar meld* *rapid bind pegasus cloak*

Sarah - Thats a totemis meld.

Tirmek - It's the only one I know.

Sarah - Can you carry me with that?

Tirmek -Yeah right:rolleyes: , I can't even fly by my self yet. Just hold on and i can slow our descent.

Sarah - Ok!

As the ground rushes toward them, Tirmek strains mightily pushing far more essentia into the cloak than is safe, or healthy, or theoretically possible. Too bad its not working very well.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-26-06, 10:50 PM		Tirmek: (i.h.h.) Crapcrapcrapcrapcrap!

Sarah: I wonder what Adam is gonna to do? He's gotta have some kind of contingency. Insane blowhard or not, he wouldn't be willing to fall to his death just to kill two children...

Tirmek: Not helping!

Sarah: Right, sorry. (i.h.h.) If this doesn't work, the contingency Featherfall Mom cast is really our only other option. I just hope I don't drop him...

OOC: They're on a freaking AIRSHIP! That's why Terra would do that. I am so not pulling this out of my you-know-what. :D
Charles Phipps

10-26-06, 11:04 PM		Jarlot: I can't wait to tell Lisa I had a drunken one night stand with her mother and she's pregnant.

Rose: You too?
rampant

10-27-06, 02:05 AM		Satnak - Huh?

Logan - :bigeyes:

Satnak - Ok i'm having pregnancy dreams. Hello there little one.

Satnak scoops the child into her arms, and wanders through the castle to find Serene.

Logan - :bigeyes:
-------------------------

Terrek - I want you to meet your brother Logan.

Serene - Ok, you named the crib Logan?:confused:

Terrek - :eek: :hoppingma :headexplo :censored:
----------------------------------------------------------

Satnak - Oy, I wonder if this is a normal dream or if I'm repressing some issues or some such.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - This is gonna hurt!

Sarah - You say that like being smashed through 8 walls, having your eartip torn off, being visciously beaten, and having a psycho do the electric slide on your torso didn't.

Tirmek - I was trying really hard to keep those sensations out of my fore-brain. Besides, this is not the time to be snippy!

Sarah - Sorry, whatever your doing with that meld doesn't look pleasant either.

Tirmek - You have no idea.

Sarah - Is that blood?

Tirmek - Besides the copius amounts from the ear and the internal bleeding?

Sarah - Your back.

Tirmek - Thats what happens when you push a meld like this.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-27-06, 08:24 AM		Terrek - :eek: :hoppingma :headexplo :censored:
13: You take your eyes off them for one little second……………

Silver: Even I'm starting to wonder at the baby-boom around here.

Bunny: Wait, shouldn't you be giving Marish contractions?

13: Right, time to see if I won.

Jarlot is upright, dissheveled but perfectly content as he holds his anime catboy son in his arms.

Jarlot: Oh, hello, I survived, so you can't poke me with this every day.

13: You mean as opposed to what I was going to do to you everyday anyway? :D

Jarlot: Yes.……………:blink:………………Wait, what?

OOC: Charles can name the kid if he wants, or I can try to come up with something.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-27-06, 08:50 AM		Meanwhile...

Ash "Now Cole, you cant go trying to assasinate your siblings..."

Cole :bigeyes:

Ash "No, not even if you want to be an only child."

Cole :weep: :bigeyes:

Ash "What did you do any way?"

Cole :devil: :thinks: :fett: :ghosted:

Ash :rolleyes: "Lead Logan into Satnacks room, after resuing him from the cadge he was in?"

Cole :ayyyy!:

Ash "That was a crib, and you do realsie Satnak's his aunt, by marage? and expectant herself, so inclined to pet not 'fet?"

Cole :tantrum:

Ash "Start small, torment spoony for a while first." [comforting]

Cole :mage:

Ash *Tears of pride* "Thats my boy."

(Stay tuned for our upcomming feature, an Eled_the_worm_tamer production in assosiation with Alfred Hitchcock. The Redfurs. :evillaugh )
rampant

10-27-06, 11:23 AM		Tirmek - Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Sarah - Why do you even use this meld?

Tirmek - Really this isn't how it works normally. Trying to push its weakest state to hold two people is what's causing the problem.

Sarah - Then use a higher state.

Tirmek - I would if I could! This is a rapid meld, I need at least an hour to rebind to a stronger one.

Sarah - Is it just me or have we been falling a long time.

Tirmek - You have three options right now.
1.) Shut up and let me focus.
2.) Get dropped.
3.) Do something useful.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-27-06, 03:27 PM		OOcat: Must………resist…………urge………to………help…………

13: Why help? You could just make the situation worse, like you prefer to do.

OOcat: Yeah…………………

Little do Tirmek and Sarah realize that they have fallen into the dreaded GAP, a clothing store that………………wait, wrong GAP…………the dreaded Gap, a huge hole in the decks that goes all the way to the deadly bottom of the hold…………
Norr

10-27-06, 06:58 PM		As the squirrel thing flitted about the Deep Bowels, there was a sudden rush of air. Confused, he stopped and looked around. Straight through the corridor behind him was a two-foot wide gap, it's edges a mess of splinters. Curious, he landed on the edge of the corridor and looked out through the shattered wall. Outside was a void of night. It was too wide for his darkvision to spot the opposite wall, but the continual air current suggested this shaft went on quite a bit on the vertical plane. Intruiged by this strange feature, the squirrel thing spread his wings and flitted out into the empty darkness. As he flew, the distance between the mutilated woodwork on either side of him grew, and he realized that the shaft was like a long gash through multiple levels of the ships interior, of which he had just chanced upon the very edge. He wouldn't reach the other end for a long while. He stopped and hovered. So... what to do...

*From somewhere overhead there is a faint noise, approaching rapidly. As it draws closer, it sounds more and more like screaming*
Tirmek and Sarah: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH

OOCNorr: The squirrel thing rolls for reflex! *Natural 1*

Squirrel thing: Whu? :confused: Who said that!?

Terrek and Sarah falls by, the noise fading rapidly as they continue their plummet into the ships bowels. Now with a small squirrely thing plastered on them, cartoon style.

OOC: You're right, it is fun to torment your characters :D
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-27-06, 07:50 PM		OOC: You're right, it is fun to torment your characters :D
OOcat: I like it so much I made a god of it.

13: :bravo:
*******
The fairy flits along the corridor in a huff. No one in the monestary of boxes knew how to "Ascend". She'd gone back to the half-toasters, but they had only spouted something about their being nothing but demons above. And she seriously was not going to try talking to the half-biscuits: anyone insane enough to worship those Teletubbie things…………*shudder*. Now all she could do was search around for tht predator thing, or something else even more dangerous.

She came to the Gap. Every being on this level avoided the huge hole in the deck ceiling. Come ot think of it, the half-toasters talked about being afraid that some demons would fall down here………………

There was a sound on the edge of hearing, sounded like screaming. The fairy looked up. There was a shape far off in the distance, growing slowly closer.

Fairy: Oh well, it's something to investigate. Maybe it's a being I can watch fall and go splat.

The fairy flies up. As she gets closer she sees that a black-furred half-rakshasa and a pink-haired half-elf were falling, the half-rakshasa apparently slowing their fall with a cloak of feathers that was beginning to bleed. They were actually falling quite fast…………

Fairy: (i.h.h. Hey, maybe this is my chance to interview someone who should be seing The Bunny!)

She flies up alongside them. (Whistling noise of falling in the background.)

Fairy: Hello, I was wondering—

Tirmek: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Fairy: Maybe I'd better speed this up: Can you see a black bunny?

Sarah: What the heck?! Why would we care if we can see a bunny?!?!?!

Fairy: Well, you see, I heard from the chief of the nearby half-toasters that they sometimes see a black rabbit in the moment before they or someone nearby dies. So I'm hoping it'll show up when you two go splat. :D I just need to know if you see it.

Tirmek: I'M TRYING TO CONCENTRATE ON US NOT DYING HERE, AND YOU'RE NOT HELPING!

Fairy: *sigh* That's a shame. I think this Bunny can tell me what I want to know about the deadly predators on the lowest decks.

Sarah: Just how deadly are we talking?! Because I doubt it's as bad as up above!

Fairy: Above? :confused: I wonder if that has anything to do with Ascending.

Tirmek: At the moment we would love to ascend, but I don't have the power! Maybe you could help us?!

Fairy: Sorry, I don't have any powers associated with saving people. That's why I just watch them die. It's sort of my hobby.

Tirmek: :censored:

Sarah: We have a friend who you'd get along great with! Just who are you?!

Fairy: I'm Maivy.
********
Maivy the Morbid.
A fairy from Who-Knows-Where (literally) with a hot body and a perky personality. Her hobby is anything to do with death, and she's completely cheerful any time she's around it. She speaks realllyreallyreally fast. To summ up, take Caralot's obsession with cute and replace "cute" with "death".

OOC: She is now free for story participation.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-27-06, 08:23 PM		Tirmek: While we're busy trying not to die and waiting for the entity who started this arc to get off his lazy butt...I've been meaning to ask you: Why did you dye your hair pink?

Sarah: Ne-chan thought it'd be a nice change of pace to switch hair colors for a while.

Maivy: I'mstillwonderingif-

Tirmek: *ignore* What is it with girls and hair?

Sarah: Hell if I know. But at least we care enough to pay attention to it...

Tirmek: That's a bit unfair. When you're covered with it, you can't afford not to.

Maivy: IfIcouldjusthavea-

Sarah: *ignore* Maybe you'd want to try a new color some time?

Tirmek: No.

Sarah: C'mon! It'll be fun! :bigeyes:

Tirmek: Not even the big eyes will change my mind.

Sarah: *humph* You're no fun. I was thinking tie-dye would look great on you.

Tirmek: :mymy:

Maivy: Whyareyouignoringme? :weep:

Meanwhile, the squirrel thing still remains plastered to the them as they plummet through a seemingly endless amount of floors.
rampant

10-27-06, 11:50 PM		Tirmek - Are you kidding me? I'd need to bathe in the stuff, I'm not twisting myself into a pretzel and letting someone put rubber bands or wax strings on me for a Bloody fur do. Now please let me focus.


Maivy - nowyoucantalktomehowlonghaveyoubeenfall-eeeeeek

*chomp*

Youtriedtoeatme!firstyouignoremethentryt osnackonmehowrudecanyoupossiblybe?!

Tirmek - Grrrrrrrr

Sarah - Seeing as we've been falling for a while, lets compare notes.

Tirmek - (i.h.h. why wont they shut up?)

Sarah - I learned to walk on water my last week at school, before the vacation kicked in.

Tirmek - Yes bouyancy took me a day or two to figure out that one. Now please let me foc....of course! Is it too much to hope you know catfall

Sarah - sorry nope

Tirmek - YOU LIVE ON A FRIGGING AIRSHIP!
Kaizer_Ryu

10-28-06, 12:25 AM		Sarah: :rolleyes: I thought it was more important to get the hang of my rages first. What you saw before was no easy task, believe you me.

Tirmek: Still doesn't change the fact that we still might die.

Maivy: OOOOOOOOOooooo! ThenIgettoseeTheBunny! :D

Sarah: Not today.

Maivy: Butthefloor'srightthereyoudon'thavemucht ime. :P

Sarah: Check this. Tirmek, hang on. Get ready with Catfall just in case.

Tirmek: Wha-

*Featherfall*

The poor squirrel thing is unaffected by the spell and goes careening into the floor in a very Wile E. Cyote-esque cloud of smoke, which clears to reveal a squirrel thing shaped crater. A small white flag rises out of the hole and waves back and forth.

Tirmek: *floating to the floor* And you decided not to mention this before WHY?! :mad:

Sarah: You were trying so hard, and I can only do it once. Mom set that up in case I fell overboard. Ne-chan's the spellcaster, not me.

Maivy: *anime pouting* :mad: IwantedtoseeTheBunny!

Tirmek: You still might. It's probably going to be us or Adam.

Sarah: Here, you need this more than I do. *hands him a Potion of Cure Moderate Wounds*

Tirmek: Where'd you get this? *chug*

Sarah: :D My parents are very thorough.
rampant

10-28-06, 12:49 AM		Tirmek - As useful as this is, no amount of potions are gonna fix my essentia flow, and loss of the thorn d'tharmis meld. Not until I get a night's rest anyway.

Sarah - In other words?

Tirmek - Your on the frontline this time.
urial angel of death

10-28-06, 01:11 AM		OOC: I would like to apologize for my borderline trolling and will try not to do it again. Kaizer has also alerted me to the implications of the "Take that Darwin". I would like to say that I didn't mean any of them. I was just saying that my OO self believed in the crack-pot theory that humans evolved from raptor like dinosaurs. Either I or OOKaizer will finish it up tomorrow.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-28-06, 01:26 AM		Tirmek - Your on the frontline this time.
Sarah: Yay! :D

Tirmek: I'm not sure why I'm surprized by that reaction. :rolleyes:

Sarah: I was hoping for another crack at him. *rubs her jaw* Still need to pay him back for that facefull of floor. You can cast spells while I keep him busy. How's your head?

Tirmek: There's only one of you now, so I'd say better. I still have a headache, though.

Sarah: Named Maivy? ;)

Tirmek: Indeed. :D

Maivy: *anime anger face* :mad: Thatissoooooorude!
rampant

10-28-06, 03:13 AM		Satnak - Ok maybe I'm not having a dream. Then who's kid is this? Whats your name little one? ( places two fingers on the infant's forehead) ... Rashour?

Rashour - :bigeyes:

Satnak - Your...Terrek's son!. Well well, i guess that makes me your big sister. Still what were you doing in my room you little scoundrel?

Serene dashes through the room.

Serene - (near breathless) Satnak! have you seen a ba....by?

Satnak - I should think so, after all the little goof woke me up.

Serene - So you didn't take him out of the crib? Nevermind, more important that he's ok.

Terrek - Thank goodness you found him! Wait a minute his diaper's been changed. This one's on backwards.

Satnak - :embarrass Oh like anyone does a good job on the first try.

Serene - What did you use for wipes?

Satnak - I owe my old T.K. instructor a very large gift basket.
Norr

10-28-06, 12:22 PM		Out of the darkness above a creature of scale and claw appears, slamming into the floor in a cloud of dust and splinters. As the cloud settles, a monster of reptilian features emerge and lets out a deafening roar. In front of it bold, bone white letters fade into view.

Master of Time: The Voice

Trumpets sound and notes from a mercilessly hammered piano issues forth from the nooks and crannies of the surrounding walls.

OOC: Ocarina of Time has awesome boss music.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-28-06, 01:01 PM		OOC: Ok, here we go. Still unfamiliar with the exact function of Tirmek's classes, so gonna have to wing it a bit while being less than specific :embarrass . I know where to find Incarnate (just don't have the book), but where are Erudite and Warblade?

IC:

After a bit, Tirmek and Sarah see Adam in pursuit. Just before he hits the ground, he slows time, allowing him to land safely.

Adam: So you survived. I am impressed.

Tirmek: Stuff it.

Adam: So eager to meet your doom? Very well. *time freeze*

Everyone but Adam freezes for a moment, followed by a heavy blow to Sarah's face. Time flows again as she careens into the wall, crumpling to the floor.

Adam: *time freeze*

This time, Tirmek is the target. The boy is sent skidding along the floor, his ribs screaming bloody murder. Sarah slowly gets to her hands and knees, coughing up blood. While his back is turned, she charges Adam, only to find herself frozen in time while in midair.

Adam: (i.h.h.) Such tenacity. Too bad they have to die.

He grabs her leg and smashes her into the floor. Still holding her, he swings the unfortunate girl around and throws her into Tirmek as he rights himself. After they land in a crumpled heap, the two are obviously at a loss.

Sarah: *cough* What do we do? I can't defend against that!

Tirmek: What can we do? I'm not even sure most of the Ubers could defend against that.

Maivy: C'monMr.BunnyIknowyou'rethere!I'msoclose Ican'tstandit! :D

Meanwhile, the two do not yet notice that Adam is seemingly lost in thought. In reality, he's having a conversation in his mind he'd much rather not.

???: Hello, Adam.

Adam: My Lords and Ladies!

Host: Yes, and we are most displeased.

Adam: I am doing your will! These children are not worthy!

Host: That is incorrect. But it is also beside the point. You were forbidden from using the powers we granted you once you passed on the mantle of flusher. You were needed to train the next generations, but you have outlived your usefulness...

Adam feels his control over time drain away as he comes back to reality.

Adam: (i.h.h.) Control over time or not, I can still kill these two unworthy beings!

Having recovered slightly, Sarah takes his moment of distraction to make another attack. As she comes at him, she hops over him to open up the line of fire for Tirmek, who hits him with a bolt of lightning. He is thrown back into a re-berzerked Sarah's waiting downward strike to the face. He slams into the floor with a bloody nose as Sarah grabs his arm and chucks him into a wall.

Maivy: :mad: Someonedieallready!!!

Tirmek: Give us a moment.

Another dose of electricity stikes Adam, but he manages to dodge Sarah's next stike. Grabbing her leg, he chucks her at Tirmek. Instead of crashing together, however, the boy steps aside. Catching her outstretched hand, he swings Sarah back at Adam for a rib shattering collision. Now bleeding internally at a pretty good rate, the battered man can barely stand before Sarah kicks him in the balls.

Adam: :eek: :weep:

Tirmek: :gah:

Sarah: I've had quite enough of you.

While he is stunned, Sarah grabs his hair, lifting him up so that his throat is exposed. As she goes for the coup de grace, she hears a strange rumbling in a nearby hall. She leaps out of the way, barely avoiding a stampede of Half-Biscuts.

Half-Biscut Leader: Bring the sacrifice! Tinky-Winky demands blood!!!

The fanatical awakened food drags away the near helpless bastard into the darkness.

Maivy: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!Comebackhere!Iwannase eTheBunny!!!!

Tirmek: Huh... I didn't see that coming...

Sarah: *holding her head* I don't...feel so hot... *collapse*

Tirmek: *sigh* Two surges so close together. You burned yourself out...

Hoisting her onto his back, he begins the long trek back to the upperdecks.

Tirmek: Ooof! You're heavier than you look...
rampant

10-28-06, 01:03 PM		OOC: Warblade is a martial adept from 9swords, erudite is a varient of the psion class from CompPsi (basically unlimited powers known, but can only use so many different ones a day, also can learn powers from any list)
Kaizer_Ryu

10-28-06, 01:43 PM		OOC: Ah, I don't have those. That would be why I can't find them. And I keep saying spells when I mean powers. *sigh* Some old habits die hard.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-28-06, 03:18 PM		Half-Biscut Leader: Bring the sacrifice! Tinky-Winky demands blood!!!
OOC: Score. :bravo: (Sorry, I don't get enough chances to pat myself on the back.)
(And techincally half-biscuits aren't awakened food: they're creatures that ate another half-biscuit, got addicited, and then kept eating half-biscuits until they became one themselves. (Don't look at me, I didn't come up with it.) It doesn't exactly matter, but it's the best part about them.)

IC: Maivy (rushing after Tirmek and Sarah): Hey wait youneedtotellmeaboutAscending!
rampant

10-28-06, 04:06 PM		Sithis - ALL HANDS ON DECK INCOMING WOUNDED!

The crew responds with their usual efficiency (i.e. the infimrary gets blown to hell and a temp is set up with bubble gum, paperclips, prayers, and the least burnt cots)

Micky and Ketler get to work patching up Ivy, Lily, and Kerrith.

Sithis - We were attacked in the underholds, some crazy dude and this little runt in the bag. Watch out he's got void power and incredible regen. Tirmek sent us back Sarah was supposed to come with us, but she disappeared.

Lisa - Sarah!

Elina - She probably went back to help Tirmek.

Terra - You *stares at Izzy* You will tell me what you're doing here or I will visit untold horrors upon you.

Lisa - He's just a child.

Terra - Exactly, I'll make cookies and eat them infront of him.
---------------------------------------

Tirmek - :evillaugh:

Maivy - :confused:

Sarah - You just opened the flood gates.

Tirmek - Many forms of ascension exist. There is deific ascension in which one becomes a diety or diety-like creature. This is most commonly acieved....blah blah blah ... draconic ascendion blahblah blah.... Ithilids.... blah blah blah... netherrealm infusion.... blah blah blah ... pink dancing mice... blah blah blah... upside down with an umbrella... blah blah blah...

Sarah - zzzz *stats drooling a little bit*

Maivey is scribbling down notes, shes gone through 3 notebooks by this point.

Tirmek blah blah blah ... In this instance you want ascension's literal meaning : to move upwards.

Maivey - :twitch: whydidn'tyousaysobeforethatwholeschpieal ?:hoppingma

Tirmek - revenge

Maivey - :headexplo

Sarah - *yawn* can we go now?

Tirmek - Sorry about that yeah lets go.
Norr

10-28-06, 04:35 PM		OOC: This happens before the previous post.

Maivy sits on the edge of a curiously shaped hole in the wooden floor.

Maivy: Areyoudeadyet?
Squirrel thing: no.
Maivy: Areyoudeadyet?
Squirrel thing: no.
Maivy: Areyoudeadyet?
Squirrel thing: no.
Maivy: Areyoudeadyet?
Squirrel thing: no.
Maivy: Areyoudeadyet?
Squirrel thing: How many times do I have to say it? I'm not dying! Leave me alone!

The squirrel thing crawled out of the hole in front of the dissappointed fairy. He dusted himself off and winced as he flexed his wings. He stretched, twisted and a grimson melody of bony sounds was played on his spine. He flexed his wings again. They seemed better. The fairy sighed and flew after the other two.
rampant

10-28-06, 04:56 PM		Izzy - smell so good :drool:

Izzy has been tied upand put under gaurd in front of the oven.
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Should be getting close.

Sarah - *sniff* i smell chocolate chip ... zzz :drool:

Tirmek - This is just not my day. (as the drool runs down the side of his head)
Kaizer_Ryu

10-28-06, 08:08 PM		OOC: I'm glad you liked it, Silver. I've been thinking of a way to get the Half-Biscuts/Toasters into my posts since you introduced them. It just seemed too perfect to have them take Adam away for their blood sacrifice instead of the standard "heroes beat bad-guy, heroes kill bad-guy" route.

IC:

Terra: I'm gonna go make sure they're ok. I can sense that they're alive at least. Keep an eye on this little creep, ok?

Lisa: Can do. Be careful.

Terra: ;) Always. *fades into shadow*

*elsewhere*

Tirmek: *pant* You need to cut back on the chili...

Sarah: :zzz:

Tirmek senses another presence approaching. However, much to his relief, this one is friendly. Terra reforms out of the shadows and runs over to the pair.

Terra: You two ok?

Tirmek: In a manner of speaking.

Terra: Here, set her down for a moment. We just got the news from Sithis. Where's the crazy guy?

Tirmek: Dead, I assume. The Half-Biscuts grabbed him just before she was about to finish him off. Some demented ceremony that demanded a sacrifice. I distinctly remember hearing something about a creepy floating baby head in the sun being pleased with their offering.

Terra: *sigh* I'm just relieved you two are allright. Here. *heal* That should do it for now. Come on. *picks him up*

Tirmek: Whoa, hey! I can walk.

Terra: You're exhausted. Just let me do this. *picks up Sarah*

Tirmek: But-

Terra: No buts. You've carried her a long way after a grueling experience. You need a break.

Tirmek: ...fine.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-28-06, 08:49 PM		OOC: I've been thinking of a way to get the Half-Biscuts/Toasters into my posts since you introduced them.
OOC: Remember I've said they aren't my original ideas. I think once I heard about both of them from their original sources—half-toasters from somewhere on these boards, half-bicuits from a product called "The Book of Ofish Might"—it just made sense that they'd make perfect enemies. When I wrote them into their big battle scene that Sa'vor's monstrousity interrupted it just sort of "clicked".

And like either would see actual use in games. :P (Note to self: use orcish rugby players and Really, Really Evil template)
Kaizer_Ryu

10-28-06, 08:59 PM		OOC: That's why I said "introduced" and not "created". But I did like the addition that the Half-Biscuts worshipped the Teletubbies. I still have nightmares from that creepy floating baby head in the sun. I thank all that is holy neither of my siblings were ever interested in those abominations.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-28-06, 09:42 PM		And as the sounds of the Half biscuts rituals filter through the lower decks the stoic and venerable Half crumpets continue to build there winding fortresses and bleacly tolling there leaden bells, profesying the imanance of the clensing flames of the Great toasting and apocaliptic buttering that would herald the comming of the cup of tea and see in the end times.

Chanse "what is it with you and food? Jack and Daniels, now a whole edable civalisation of doomsday cultist Crumpets. And the irony is you hate tea, and you're tetoal. You drink Coffie for lucks sake.

OOC Eled :lightbulb

Chanse "No, no light bulb, put the geane back in the bottle, I did not give you another idea, you are not spawning off another one joke charicter for me to compete with. step away from the key-" "-back then, taht wasnt funny."

"HiisyournameChanse?Ithinkthatsafunnyname mynameisExpressodoyouthinkthatsafunnynam etoo?"

Chanse "what the hell is this thing?"

OOC Eled "Its a {Coffie} beanybabie, its your fault for inspiring me."

Chanse :rolleyes: :weep: "this is what you get working with amiters..."

Ash "Odd, I thought it was the result of bad mouthing your enitity, who, I havent said enough is reamarably talented..." :cool:
Charles Phipps

10-28-06, 10:26 PM		Way Back when

*on the top of the outer wall of Boranal Castle. They look down to the front gate of the castle. Sixty Warforged are visible*

Jarlot There's more than thirty

Terra What's the difference? We've got him. Help me here. We'll have to force feed him.

Jarlot Has it been fifteen minutes?

Terra We can't wait -- the wedding's in half an hour and we must strike in the hustle and the bustle beforehand. Tilt his head back. Open his mouth.

Jarlot: How long do we have to wait before we know if the miracle works?

Terra. Your guess is as good as mine. I wonder why Miracle Jarlot Senior told us it was a "suppository." I wonder what that word means.

Rose I'll beat you both apart. I'll take you both together.

Jarlot: Huh, the pill works. I get that means that I owe you 5 copper.

Terra: I'll take a rain check.

*Rose's head thrashes back and forth*

Rose: Why won't my arms move?

Jarlot: You've been mostly dead all day.

Terra: We had Miracle Jarlot Senior make a pill to bring you back. He's Jarlot's father and used the sacred arts of Clerical Magic to bring you back.

Rose: Oh God, he didn't do horrible things to my bum did he?

Jarlot: No, that's the Dol Dorn way of ressurecting you. He just gave you a pill.

Rose: Oh thank the Traveller.

Gozor: *Roars in distant Dimensions*

Rose: Who are you? -- Are we enemies? Why am I on this wall? -- Where's Achika?

Terra Let me explain. *pauses very briefly* No, there is too much. Let me sum up. Achika is marrying Boranal in a little less than half an hour, so all we have to do is get in, break up the wedding, steal the Princess, make our escape after I kill Count Aaren D'Cannith.

Rose That doesn't leave much time for dilly dallying. Why do you want to kill Aaren D'Cannith?

Terra: You know how many men are honorable and would never take a woman against her will?

Rose: Yes?

Terra: He's not one of those men.

Rose: I'm afraid I have a prior claim on the man for killing my father.

Terra: Is that a problem?

Rose: No, as long as he's dead I'm fine with it. I'm a bard not a Lhazaar who studied twenty years to master the arts of swordmanship just to kill him in an elaborate duel.

*He is watching his fingers, one of which twitches now.*

Jarlot You've just wiggled your finger. That's wonderful.

Rose I've always been a quick healer. Comes from a Ring of Vampiric Regeneration. Anyone feeling like they've lost any levels?

Terra: No.

*Commoner falls to the ground dead beside the place they're standing*

Rose: Good, then it's not drawing energy from you. What are our liabilities?

Terra: There is but one working castle gate. And it is guarded by sixty warforged plus the entire King's Citadel is spread throughout the Castle.

Rose: And our assets?

Terra: Your brains, Jarlot's strength, my steel. Plus a bunch of cameos from our future.

Rose: It'd be a lot easier if you added druid magic in there.

Terra: Can't, city. Part of my prestige class.

Rose: Damnit. That's it? Impossible. If I had a month to plan, maybe I could come up with something. But this...*shakes head*

Jarlot: You wiggled. Be happy!

Rose: My brains, his steel, and your strength against sixty men, and you think a little head jiggle is supposed to make me happy? I mean, if we only had a television studio and a bunch of washed up celebreties, that would be something.

Jarlot: This is Sharn, it's home for every out of work actor in the world.

Rose: Why didn't you mention that before?

***

10 minutes later

*A group of carpenters start setting up an elaborate blue stage in front of them*

Warforged Captain: Hmmmm.

*The Jeopardy theme starts to play*

Alex Gnomeback: Welcome to Celebrity Perriferdy. I am your host, Alex Gnomeback. Our guests today are

Erandis D'Vol, King Kaius, and....Jarlot Senior.

Jarlot Senior: I'll take Famous ******* for 400.

Alex Gnomeback: FOR THE LOVE OF GODS! WE HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED YET.

Jarlot Senior: What Can I say? That category gives me a raging mad on.

Alex Gnomeback: It's FAMOUS TITLES! Not *******! Titles!

Jarlot Senior: Not a fan of the ladies are we Gnomebeck?

Warforged: BWhahahahahahahaha!

*the group sneaks in behind the laughing warforged*
Charles Phipps

10-28-06, 10:56 PM		Welcome back to the First Annual Forgotten Freedom Beauty Pageant

King Steve: They gave us land, tobacco, grain, and friendship....

Queen Aurala: And what did you do next for the peace negotiations with Darguun?

King Steve: Well obviously I gave them diseased blankets, burned down their villages, and made bogus treaties in language they couldn't understand.

Queen Aurala: BRAVO! You truly are a brilliant king!

King Steve: I'd feel bad but they aren't human.

Jarlot: Next up on our list is the Paladin Lisa!

*Lisa in her shining armor*

Lisa: I've come here to protest this blanket exploitation of...

*Man from the audience shouts*

Michael: Take it off girl!

Lisa: *walks over and starts hitting him with a hammer*

King Steve: I do admit that I like her style.

Aurala: Well she is royal, so automatically that eliminates everyone not royal.

*Marish walks up to Aurala in rags and an empty bowl*

Marish: Please ma'am, can I have some more!

Aurala: BACK TO SCRUBBING WENCH!

*Aurala cracks whip and Marish flees*

King Steve: Sooo Lisa, how do you feel about shoes made out of....babies?

Lisa: WHAT!?

King Steve: EXPENSIVE shoes made out of babies.

Lisa: I'm against them!

King Steve: Even when they're made fresh daily?

Lisa: Especially when they're made fresh daily!

Queen Aurala: By the way, I wanted to compliment you on your shoes Steve. They make such cute crying noises everytime you walk.

Jarlot: Sooooo will you show us your swimwear?

Lisa: NO!

*they all hold up 0s for her score*

Lisa: SMITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTE!
rampant

10-28-06, 11:23 PM		Tirmek awakes in the infirmary.

Tirmek - (tries to get up) sheeeeeef - guess not.

Ketty - Not so fast son.

Tirmek - Mommy :eek:

Sarah - He faces down two divine assasins, and its his mother that scares him.

Elina - He may just be as smart as he thinks he is.

Ketty - Name 3 good reasons why I shoudn't ground you until you're twenty?

Tirmek - We thought it was just one unkillable ametuer. By the time we found out about mr.ugly we were too deep in the ship for all of us to escape. I tried sending for help when the true nature of the situation became appearant, but my scout decided to fight instead. Besides, what was the point of all the training I've had if I'm just going to cut and run every time a fight comes around.

Ketty - (just breaks down and hugs Tirmek)

Tirmek - Look I appreciate the affection, but fugly worked my ribcage over what good, and I blew out most of my shoulders on the drop and the following altercation.
-----------------------------------------------------------

Later over milk and cookies.

Sarah - ...and thats how we messed up fugly.

Sithis - Mickey does good work your ear doesn't look too bad.

Tirmek pulls his ear foward.

Tirmek - Chek the scars behind it.

Elina - What about your back?

Tirmek - Oh that will have a right mark too. Its under the bandages though and in a week or two my fur will grow back and cover both of them.

Kerrith - You look ridiculous you know.

Tirmek - Too bloody right! I feel naked!

Elina - Its just the areas around the wounds.

Tirmek - Still.

Kerrith - Beastman getting chilly without his fur:D

Tirmek - Someone else explain it to him. I'm tired.

Elina - Tirmek's feline traits are not bestial, they are fiendish.

Sarah - He is half- Nazarune Rakshasa. A high class fiend.

Ivy - His mother is the Half-elf Ketty d'Tharmis.

Kerrith - Whats the other half?

Lilly - Human

Kerrith - za :twitch:
------------------------------------

OOC: Urial?
Kaizer_Ryu

10-28-06, 11:44 PM		Way back when

Just before the party enters the gate, they see a member of the King's Citadel trying to close it quickly. Terra shifts to Bear form and forces the gate back up. She then grabs his collar and holds him in front of a still mostly paralyzed Rose (he is being carried by Jarlot).

Rose: *seriously* Give us the Gate key.

Captain Nathan Hunter: I-I have no Gate key...

Jarlot: *matter of factly* Terra...tear his arms off.

Capt. Hunter: :eek: Oh, you mean this Gate key.

Jarlot: Thank you. *grabs it*

Capt. Hunter: (i.h.h.) Oh, man. This is one story little Jacob is never gonna hear...

OOC: Sorry, had to do it. :D
Charles Phipps

10-29-06, 01:01 AM		OOC: Hahahahaha.

Good one there Ryu.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-29-06, 01:10 AM		OOC: Thanks. This crew has already driven Jacob mad several times over, so I couldn't pass up the chance to mess with his family as well when the chance presented itself. :D

IC:

Sometime before Tirmek wakes up:

Sarah lies in one of the beds near Tirmek as Ketty watches him. He had received the worst of the assault, yet had carried her halfway through the ship before her mother had found them. She'd gotten off with mental exhaustion, quite a few bruises, and one hell of a headache, but Tirmek would bear several scars from the encounter.

Sarah: Sorry, ma'am.

Ketty: *turns* For what?

Sarah: Tirmek told me to go for help, but I didn't listen. He was hurt worse because it was just the two of us. ...I just...

Ketty: Couldn't leave him on his own? I should probably thank you for it.

Sarah: :confused:

Ketty: From what you and the others told us about this Adam and Izzy, my son was in way over his head by himself. I'm pretty sure even you couldn't have gotten help in time.

Sarah: ...you're not mad?

Ketty: I'm fairly certain you saved his life, so no.

Sarah: *sigh of relief* But still, we got lucky. I don't know why, but Adam lost his ability to control time just before we hit our limit.

Ketty: Whatever the reason, remember; luck favors the prepared.

Sarah: I'll keep that in mind.
Crystalforged

10-29-06, 01:05 AM		Without warning Kanatash and Caralot suddenly find themselves sitting on a chunk of stone. Above them puffy clouds drift as one might expect, however similar, darker clouds also drift below them. No other land can be seen in any direction and they are litteraly sitting atop a small island of stone floating in the middle of an endless sky.

Caralot: :confused: Where are we? What happened?

Kanatash: As to what, I would assume that my entity has transported us here. I'm not sure his purpose but he must have something planned. The where however... (glances up) Oh, son of a *****!

Caralot: What is it?

Kanatash points upward, drawing attention to the massive red moon hanging over their heads. Five other moons of various colors can be seen on the fringes of the horizon.

Caralot: And what exactly does that mean?

Kanatash: *sigh* It means we're in a game world. THE game world. I was afraid this would happen.

Caralot: Ok, Kanatash, stop beating around the bush, just spit it out.

Kanatash: Let me explain it like this. You know how Terra and Lisa's Entity has this unhealthy obsession with the Link and Hyrule, its like that except even more pathetic.

Caralot: Oh dear.

Kanatash: It's even worse than that though. He's obsessed with the game, he might just become immersed in the game and completely forget about us. Who knows how long we'd be stuck here then.

Caralot: So we're stuck here? Can't we just fly away or something? He's your entity, can't you contact him?

Kanatash: And go where? We're stuck in this world until my entity decides to take us somewhere else. Oh, and I've already tried to contact but my connection was... blocked.

Caralot: Blocked? Blocked how?

Kanatash: Joy. Pure unadulterated bliss. I've tried to purge all happiness from his soul but I've yet to succeed. He's enjoying himself so much that I can't make my voice heard in his head.

Caralot: *sigh* So what do we do now?

Kanatash: (shrug) There's not much we can do really. I guess we just make ourselves comfortable here, my entity has to show up "eventually".

Caralot: Eventually you say? Well I hope "eventually" doesn't come to soon. (husky chuckle)

---

One week later:

(numerous gruesome noises and screaming)

Caralot: You've been a very, very bad boy.

Kanatash: Yes punish me, punish me.

Ooooh, kay then. We'll come back.

---

Two weeks later:

Kanatash: (panting) Ok... Five minute break...

Caralot: (breathing heavily) That's ok... Take ten...

---

One month later:

Kanatash: Man is he taking a long time.

Caralot: Are you sure he's coming for us?

Kanatash: Well, characters only have access to video game worlds by entity permission so he has to be here somewhere. Where though? Your guess is as good as mine. I'm getting nothing from him, he's still giddy as a schoolgirl.

---

One YEAR later:

A sprawling mansion now covers the island. Vast gardens surround the manor, teaming with life. Various pokemon frolic in said gardens as well. Outwardly everything seems relatively normal but looking deeper reveals some very bizarre things. Not only does closer inspection do many of the plants have very sharp teeth there is also an oddly disturbing abundance of tentacle-like vines draped throughout the garden. The pokemon creatures are odd as well. There are odd quirks among all of them, sometimes as simple as solid black eyes like wells of darkness to extra limbs or bizarre hybrids of two different species.

The mansion itself is composed entirely of white marble with stained glass windows portraying landscapes impossible in this reality. Inside Kanatash and Caralot recline next to a pool while a pair of pokemon fan them palm fronds. Another feeds grapes to Caralot while a fourth holds out a plate of hor derves. The two of them seem to be genuinely relaxed; sipping martinis, chatting nonchalantly about the finer details of their latest experiments, basking in the sun.

The peace is shattered however by the sound of an approaching airship. The steel craft is massive and bristling with weapons. The flag flying from the crows nest features a skull and a sword on a blue background. It hover directly over the mansion and a line drops from it which OOCrystalforged promptly rappels down.

OOCrystalforged: Hey, guys! Sorry, I got a little side-tracked after bringing you here.

Caralot: No kidding.

OOCrystalforged: (glancing around) Where did you get the materials to make this place anyways?

Kanatash: I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, the space-time continuum is my *****.

Caralot: And you’re MY *****.

Kanatash: (glares)

Caralot: :P

OOCrystalforged: (Nelson laugh)

Kanatash: (crosses arms in a sulk) Fine, fine. Can we finally get done what you came here to do in the first place?

OOCrystalforged: (jerks the line) All aboard.

---

Shortly later, everyone is on the bridge of the ship.

OOCrystalforged: Welcome to the Delphius, the most powerful airship in the world. I’d also to introduce the crew of this fine ship; Vyse, Aika, and Fina.

Vyse: (looking at Kanatash and pulls out his blades) It’s you!

Fina: Ramirez!

Kanatash: I do believe I’ve been mistaken for someone else. OOCrystalforged, would you please clear this up?

OOCrystalforged: (staring at Fina) :drool:

Fina: (glancing nervously at OOCrystalforged while whispering to Aika) No matter how many times he does that it still creeps me out.

Aika: And no matter how many time I pummel him he still keeps doing it. (cracks knuckles)

*brief interlude for vicious beating*

Kanatash: (standing over OOCrystalforged’s broken body) Thank you kindly for diffusing that little situation. Now can we PLEASE get on with what we came here for?

OOCrystalforged: (rising) Ugh, alright. Anyway I’ve got a few people I wanted you to meet. Lets see. (snaps his fingers)

A very short man appears in a puff of smoke. He wears a bizarre glass dome over his head for no apparent reason.

Aika: De Loco!?

Vyse: Your supposed to be dead!

OOCrystalforged: He is. Your point?

Vyse: :blink:

OOCrystalforged: Now as I was saying before I was interrupted here’s someone you should get along with just fine with Kanatash. He’s on your level of insanity, more neurosis’s than you can shake a stick at.

De Loco: Yes, yes. Even from the other side I will make Vyse suffer for damaging my precious machines.

Vyse: Is anyone else feeling oddly uncomfortable right now?

Kanatash: Machines huh? I don’t know, the only kind of engineering I was ever interested in was the genetic sort.

De Loco: Human life is nothing compared to the worth of a perfect machine.

Kanatash: On second thought I think we might get along just fine.

OOCrystalforged: I thought so. Now for Caralot… Well I don’t have much honestly, just a sampling of the local fauna. I thought you might like the Hamachus particularly. If you want creepy, just go visit the old Hamachu man. He always creeped me out. Oh and as long as you guys are here you just HAVE to check out the dark rift. That place should feel just like home for you Kanatash. Anyways right now I have bigger fish to fry.

Fina: No! It’s Zelos!

A giant silver sphere rises from the center of a nearby continent, exploding forth from a tower in its center as it grows to massive proportions.

OOCrystalforged: Like I said, bigger fish to fry. (turns to Vyse) :bigeyes: Can I say it? Please, please, please, please, please.

Vyse: Oh, fine.

OOCrystalforged: (assumes a dramatic pose) MOONSTONE CANNON, FIRE!

Kanatash: We really need to get him away from this place.

Caralot: Uh-huh.
rampant

10-29-06, 01:17 AM		Tirmek - These are really good cookies.

Sarah - i know mom makes the best.

Elina - Mmmmmmmmm

Izzy - You people are EVIL INCARNATE!

Tirmek - Last i checked my sheet said good.

Elina - We don't even have an essentia pool.

Izzy - NOT WHAT I MEANT!
Kaizer_Ryu

10-29-06, 01:20 AM		:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

*gasp* *pant* *wheeze*

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Wonderful post, Crystalforged! I know exactly how you feel. Especially with Fina. :drool:

There was this little red flag in my head telling me not to take Terra and Lisa there, and I just figured out why. One word: Gilder. They would have beaten him to a pulp and fed him to Claire. ;)

And I loved this move:

Vyse: In dire need-

Aika: -we call forth-

OOCrystalforged: -the power-

Fina: -of the Ancients!

All: To battle our foe!

*MUCH PWNAGE ON ZELOS/RAMIREZ FUSION*

Sounds cheezy outside of the game, but damn if it wasn't awesome to behold the first time. :D
Crystalforged

10-29-06, 01:27 AM		Oh. Hell. Yes.

God I love Prophecy.

That's actually the effect I was trying to go for when I had Satnak drop a moon on Pun-Pun but I don't think anyone caught it at the time.



God I love that game.

EDIT: Now that you mention it I'm kinda glad you didn't take Terra and Lisa to there like you talked about. Gilder is way too cool to be beaten up like that. Did I mention I also loved Gunslinger and Pirate's Wrath?
Kaizer_Ryu

10-29-06, 01:44 AM		I knew that scenario seemed familiar. Now I know why.

At the risk of completely geeking out, have you ever fought Sky Pirate Vigoro? It takes forever to get the requirements. I keep telling myself I'm gonna do it at some point, then I forget. :raincloud

One thing I wish other games would pick up on is the music changing based on how well you're faring. It really added a lot.

OOKaizer: :bigeyes: C'mon! Do it!

Vyse: He's at 2 HP.

OOCrystalforged: So?

Vyse: Isn't it a little overkill?

OOKaizer: It's the final battle!

OOCrystalforged: Yeah! Go out with some flair!

Vyse: :rolleyes: Fine. PIRATE'S WRATH

*Awesomeness ensues*

OOCrystalforged: High five!

OOKaizer: :D

OOC: Pirate's Wrath rocks.
rampant

10-29-06, 01:48 AM		Tirmek - You know school starts day after tomorrow.

Elina - Aww come on!

Sarah - Are you gonna be recovered by then?

Tirmek - Your kidding right? my essentia flow is gonna be disrupted all week, I'm going to be stiff and sore for at least another day or 4, Ugh. I'm gonna have to take it easy for a bit. I hope I can heal up before the qualifiers.

Sarah - Qualifiers? Its the middle of race season, your the favorite to take the brawler's cup.

Elina - He means the tournaments.

Sarah - Awesome! Did you get the permission slips signed?

Elina - I thought you had them?
Crystalforged

10-29-06, 01:57 AM		Oh sweet god. Even my love for that game has limits. I found ever last discovery, beat all the bounties, finished the Piastol side quest but I have never faced him. He really is an SOB to get to isn't he. The only things I haven't done in that game though is beat him and find a last couple of chests which have proven real buggers.



Kanatash: This is too pathetic for words

Caralot: Sheesh, no kidding.
Lord Kale Fangblade

10-29-06, 09:15 AM		Sithis and Feal-Thas stood opposite each other, Sithis's mind blade was a razor thing rapier shape. Feal-Thas's sword glinted along its edges, Thier eyes locked.
Sithis Saw the brutal and bloodthirsty intensity that lurked within those eyes, he saw the battles that their owner had thought. he saw bursts of flame consuming troops. he saw blood. Death. and gore within those eyes.
Feal-Thas and Sithis Circled, each looking for a weakness. each planning their strikes.

Feal-Thas lunged, bringing his sword in a crusing downwards blow. Sithis parried and felt Feal-Thas's sheild smash into his chest, Sithis staggered and Feal-Thas brought the hilt of his sword on his righthand with a sickening crack. Sithis lay there on his back, pinned there by the tip of Feal-Thas's sword.

Feal-Thas moved the sword away and offered a hand. Sithis took it and was pulled to his feet in an insant.

Sithis: (I.h.h) Wow. this guys strong. deffinetly stronger than me.

Feal-Thas: born to it. im designed to be strong. That and almost constant training.

Sithis: How could you....

Feal-Thas: Battle training, the easiest way to defeat an oponent is to know his thoughts. That or crush his mind. Farther, Naz'roth, Tara and Kithle where very thourough in their training methods.

Sithis: so how do i keep you out?

Feal-Thas: *laughs* you cant. Im trained to access the thoughts of almost anybody, even intelligent undead. every mind has a frequency, you just have to find it. the only way you can block it is to hit the powerlevel of an uber. i dont see that happening any time soon.

Sithis: how about giving you missinformation?

Feal-Thas: now that you can do, you see, Battle isnt a game. theres no time to think, its like a dance, the sound of fighting and death is the music. just concentrate on the music, imerse yourself in the battle and you'll find that nothing can stop you.

Sithis: sounds difficult....

Feal-Thas: it isnt. You see your weakness is that your thinking to much, Too many mind.

Sithis: what?

Feal-Thas: *sigh* You mind the blade, Mind the crowd, Mind yourself. No Mind. Thats the key.

Sithis: i see...

Feal-Thas: Good. now lets try again.

The faced each other again, their eyes locked, Sithis felt out with his mind. he imersed himself in the feel of battle, the mindless intenstiry of combat. the screams of the dying. he closed his eyes, and parried. Feal-Thas's sword bounced off his mindblade, He dodjed to the side as Feal-Thas's shield wend for his chest. he parried at his lower leg as Feal-Thas attempted to hamstring him. he span, moving slugishly in the heavy leadarmour. he brought his mindblade towards Feal-thas's chest, Feal-Thas moved like lightning despite the weight of his armour bringing his sheild into a parry.

Sithis felt a sharp pain in his chest as Feal-Thas brought the hilt of his sword into him. then another in his leg as Feal-Thas is foot caught him, he stumbled and Feal-Thas brought his shoulder into play. Sithis hit the floor with another crash and felt an armoured boot on his chest as well as once again. the prick of a sword at his throat.

Feal-Thas: better. you just need somemore practise.

Sithis: how are you so fast in that armour?

Feal-Thas: i've been training with it for almost a year now, i was born fully grown. trust me, it gets easier. That and i've been in several real battles.

he offered a hand again and pulled Sithis to his feet.

Feal-Thas: you did well, i couldnt hear your thoughts at all. all i got where emotions, we're probably going to have to put you in constant drilling with this armour. oh and give you a new weapon.

Sithis:... whats that?

Feal-Thas: *evil smile* a lead tube filled with guess what? Lead.

Sithis: i have a feeling this isnt ordinary lead is it?

Feal-Thas: Not really. its enchanted so it ways a lot. it designed to take everyone to the same point strength wise. after a few weeks you'll get used to fighting in it. Right, you'll need to see Naz'roth next. He's our residant Warlock expert, that and a master craftsman.

Sithis: i've heard about him, isnt he that Daemon Lord?

Feal-Thas: yeah. he's more powerful than most Ubers, only the real powerful ones could even damage him. let alone beat him. ever seen him or satnak fight?

Sithis: No.

Feal-Thas: trust me, you dont. they're killing machines, i've seen them wade through thousands of troops, killing everything that gets in their way. Even normal ubers can cause rediculous amounts of damage on the battle field, but those two. well, they're born to battle. they've been fighting all their lives and their good at it. me? i could never come close to matching those two.

Sithis:.... lets just hope we dont get into any real battles any time soon.

Feal-Thas: *smile* if we did, you probably wouldnt be on the front line.

Sithis turned and walked up the steps to the Obsidiain fortress that stood within this dimension. it was intresting, His Grandfather had carved it from the stuff of the Astral plane. his own little world. full of his own children.
he must of had some plan on sending him here, though Sithis always wondered why he didnt return once Grandmother died. perhaps he thought he was too old to? or perhaps, he was staying to keep an eye on a seventh son of a seventh son. perhaps. who knew with grandfather?
rampant

10-29-06, 09:50 AM		Ketty - All aboard whos coming aboard.

Sarah - Why are we always almost late?

Elina - Your the one that had to chase squirrels.

Sithis - Which begs the question; why did they hit me with the flaming acorns?

Tirmek (wearing a torso wrap) - Come on I can walk!

Satnak - Quiet you.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-29-06, 10:40 AM		OOcat: :tantrum: Must…find…spice…island…:ghosted:

13: Okay, I think that's enough for today.
*******
Bunny sits atop a giant yellow insect-like magical machine, flanked by a blue long-necked bird machine, and a purple whale cyborg. On the ground and green giant machine and a four-headed red machine lurch along.

Bunny (spotting Zelos (which I assume is the silver gigas, never got that far)): Okay, Mr. "Cool-Bad Dude", no one is allowed to have that much destructive power except me. (yelling out to the gigas: ) DESTROY, MY PRETTIES! EHEEHEEHEEHEEHEE!

OOcat (to OOCrystalforged): Sorry buddy, but I'm going to have to change venues.

Silver: You sure it's not just because you don't want to stare at Aika all day. :devil:

OOcat: That too. :bored:
****TRANSITION****
Kanatash: That would have been more dramatic if you'd sent us somewhere.

OOcat: Give me a minute. :P
urial angel of death

10-29-06, 02:43 PM		At the cookie scene.

Kerrith: Human... Demon... Is there any more unholy crossbreed?! The demons should have all been dead before you were born. The elves made sure of that. Y-yo-you sh-shouldn't be alive!

OOC: I have no idea where this would go.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-29-06, 03:39 PM		Sarah: Then that applies to us as well.

Elina: We're Half-Fiend, too. So is Mom.

Kerrith: :twitch:

Lilly: Remember when you freaked a bit and jokingly asked if drow are roaming savages, humans are the ruling species, and orcs have saved the planet, then I confirmed all three?

Kerrith: :twitch: Yes...

Lilly: Same thing with Demons. They're alive and well on several of the moons, not to mention Eberron.

Kerrith: :twitch: I assume that next you'll tell me that Good and Evil are subjective concepts...

Sarah: Ummmm...

Kerrith: :surrender :banghead:

Elina: I suppose now is a bad time to tell you that we are not only Half-Fiend, but Half-Celestial as well.

Kerrith: :ghosted:

Sarah: I'm gonna say yeah on that one.

Tirmek: At least we won't have to hear him talk for a bit. We can get back to commenting on *leans really close to Izzy* how wonderful these cookies are! :devil:

Izzy: *struggling in vain* :hoppingma :drool: YOU PEOPLE SUCK!!!
Charles Phipps

10-29-06, 03:43 PM		later

Pholly: Are you sure that this is an experiment you're willing to take?

Lilly: If I am to achieve Ultimate power in Alchemy then I must do it!

Pholly: There will be CONSEQUENCES....

Lilly: Damn the Consequences!

*Lilly slaps his hands down into the drawn circle*

***

Sarah: I feel weird.

Elina: Me too.

*both girls have cute little wolf ears and tails pop out*

Sarah: I'm going to kill that Lilly.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-29-06, 04:24 PM		Kerrith: *staring at their ears and tail*

Sarah: What?

Elina: I think we forgot to mention that we carry Werewolf blood as well.

Kerrith: :twitch: :twitch: :twitch: :twitch:
Norr

10-29-06, 05:10 PM		*From behind Kerrith* I wonder what he would say about fey.

Tirmek and Sarah glance away from the tortured Izzy.

Tirmek: How did you get here?

Squirrel thing: I followed you. I haven't seen the sun in two years, figured it was time to come out of the closet *rubs sore eyes*. :shifty: Besides, I haven't smelled cookies in, like, forever.

OOC: Sorry cypher, they have very similar names, all fixed now.
cypher_zero

10-29-06, 05:19 PM		OOC: Umm... How the heck did Terrek get involved? Last I checked, he was my char... and I said no touchy. Comprende?
.
urial angel of death

10-29-06, 05:27 PM		the list:

#: Stupid is not allowed to sing "the Doom Song"
#+1: you may not encourge stupid to sing the doom song
#+2: Stupid was not created from parts found in the garbage
#+3: Stupid's brain did not come from the random juck Merrix found in his pocket.

OOC: Cypher could I introduce Terrek to Kerrith?
Kaizer_Ryu

10-29-06, 05:27 PM		OOC: I think Norr meant Tirmek, not Terrek. There are so many T names, it's hard to keep track sometimes.
Norr

10-29-06, 05:37 PM		You can get the Ford model T in any colour, as long as it's black.
- Henry Ford
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-29-06, 05:44 PM		Maivy waits around to see if anything else happens that could trigger the appearence of The Bunny. After Kerrith falls over several times but fails to die she gets bored and flies off.

Maviy: *sigh* Maybe being around fiend/celestial/werewolfs will mean more deaths to watch. I wonder what else is on this ship. Who knew that that whole big underground was part of an airship?

Just then Maivy's acutely tuned death-symptom senses pick up the sound of groaning and the creaking of a body that can barely support itself. She follows the sound to some sort of break room where a hunched half-elf in pajamas with a green top and brown pants plus a floppy green nighcap stares blankly at a coffee-maker.

Maivy: :blink…………

Rose's senses, despite their need for caffine fuel, register a slight tingle.

Maivy: …………………:lightbulb —

Something inside Rose shifts into high-gear and creates its own caffine.

Maivy: —SPOONY BARD! :D

*chase scene*

13: So completely worth the wait.

OOC: No one but me is to introduce Maivy to Bunny or the rest of the Commentary Crew. I want to give her a run-around for a while. You are welcome to join in. :devil:
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-29-06, 06:59 PM		Rose runs past Ash, screaming mans with Maivy in hot persuit. ash watches, grins, sips his coffie, expresion setling into prankish malevolance.

He disapears, apearing ahaed of rose, lowers slowly till he floats just an inch or so over the ground. He begins to hummm a low droaning song 'Bummmmmmm bummmmmm'

Rose runs like a traned coward, weaving though crewmen, pholly damage and the other hazards, to hurried to notise Ash.

'bumbumbumbumbumbum' as Rose passes Ash extends a talloned leg, Rose, still standing, tumbles through the air like a batton, for a moment hes siloeted as he passes before the sun in his leap.

As he falls landing head first on the aged and pitted deck Ash's humming turns to a brassy fanfare "buuuuuuuuum bummmm"

(ooc Atempting to spoof the 2001: a space odesy's opeing / melody is remarcably hard to do in type. :weep: )
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-29-06, 08:47 PM		(ooc Atempting to spoof the 2001: a space odesy's opeing / melody is remarcably hard to do in type. :weep: )
Silver: I alwayst thought it went like this:
Duuuuuuunnnnnn, duuuuuuunnnnnnnnnn, duuuuuuuunnnnnnnn, da-naaaaaaaaaaaa—
DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN…………

13: What we really want to know is the exact words to the MST3K theme song.

Bunny: I think they should have expanded the part where the chimps killed each other. Like, to the whole movie. HAL was just pathetic.
rampant

10-29-06, 09:10 PM		Tirmek - Before we go I have a package for you guys.

Pulls a plain brown wrapped box with white string out of a portable hole.

Tirmek - I figured you guys would need all the help you can get against me:D ;)

Sithis - Don't you think the injuries will give us an edge?

Tirmek - I could take you with one hand behind my back Vampy.:P

Elina - Ohh its so pretty.

Elina has unwrapped the box already and pulled out a cloth glove with a grinning fox face on the palm.

Tirmek - Its a Fox focus. It allows you to synch your second mind-blade to your first, also when you prepare spells you can replace any spell with one of the spells of the same level in the focus. (mostly illusion spells)

Sarah - I think this one is yours.

She hands Sithis a ring composed of one white wire twisted with a black wire.

Tirmek - An undead's weaknesses are well known and readily availiable, ever since that incident with those gnome zombies anyway. This should offer some protection. (i.e. minor Positive energy resistance, and boosted saves vs. any effect that targets undead)

Sarah - So that leaves me - wow!

Sarah holds up agauntlet with small emeralds studded in the knuckles.

Tirmek - It will transform with you, and you can channel psionic power through it for an energy strike.

Sithis - Interesting, not so much power boosts as expanding options.

Elina - How did you afford these?

Tirmek - Race winnings, and I helped make them. :D
Kaizer_Ryu

10-30-06, 01:18 AM		13: What we really want to know is the exact words to the MST3K theme song.
OOKaizer: Which one? There are at least five different openings. Off the top of my head, I can recite two. Give me five minutes, and I can get the rest. I'm pretty sure you don't want the KTMA version, though. How MST3K survived those years is beyond me. *shudder*

13: :bored: The Nerd is strong in this one...

-----

Kerrith wanders the halls, lost deep in thought. Tirmek, Sarah, Elina, and Sithis were gone, and Lilly was nowhere to be found (Not that he really wanted to talk to that insane human...). Ivy was off on another ingredient run, and Nalfein was still recovering from three straight days of immolation by secondhand exposure to cuteness.

Kerrith: (i.h.h.) Elves still exist, Demons still exist, Good and Evil are subjective, Vampires are nobility, my people are roaming savages, the filthy humans are the dominant species, and there is no ruling matriarch. WHAT THE HELL IS UP WITH THIS WORLD?!?! Not to mention I encounter three human/elf/demon crossbreeds within hours of arriving, one of which I find myself strangely attracted too...

*at the Island*

Elina: *shudder* There's that icky feeling again...

*back to Kerrith*

Kerrith: I wonder how Master is doing...

Rounding a corner he finds Cuddles showing Admiral Wolverine Lightningbolt the ropes.

Kerrith: (i.h.h.) Ah, Master's familiar. Perhaps this is a good opportunity to learn more about my wonderful teacher. (out loud) Excuse me, Cuddles.

Cuddles: You call me Spleen-eater, newbie.

Kerrith: *anime sweat drop* Uh, yes, sorry. Spleen-eater, I was wonder-

Cuddles: Before you begin, would you mind turning around?

Kerrith: Um...ok... *turns so his back is to the pair* As I was saying, I was wondering if you could-

Cuddles: *whispering to Lightningbolt* :teach: Ok, son. Here's a perfect opportunity. Stay low to the ground. Make sure you keep a firm grip on the floor so you don't slip on takeoff.

A.W. Lightningbolt: :devil:

Kerrith: -tell me a bit about my Master. As his familiar, you have some-

Cuddles: The best places to go for are the neck and the legs. The neck has a lot of vulnerable spots, like the jugular and the windpipe, but since this one is a bit tall for you to go for the neck, we'll focus on legs this time. Now remember, he has a name, so you can't kill him-

A.W. Lightningbolt: :raincloud

Cuddles: But you can still maim him pretty good.

A.W. Lightningbolt: :w00t:

Kerrith: *turns his head* I'm sorry, but what are you doing?

Cuddles: Pouncing lessons.

Kerrith: Ah, yes, pouncing. *turns back* Very good...:eek: POUNCING?! *whips around* Oh, no, you can't be serious...:weep:

Cuddles just motions for him to turn back around. Reluctantly, he does so. He hears a few more whisperings, then nothing. After a few moments, he turns to look, but they are nowhere in sight. Then-

A.W. Lightningbolt: *CHOMP*

Kerrith: *little girl scream* *falls to the ground*

A.W. Lightningbolt: *gnaw* *chew* *bite*

Cuddles: Great job, son! You make your old man proud. :D

A.W. Lightningbolt: :angel: *munch*

Kerrith: :weep:

Cuddles: (i.h.h.) He's just so adorable! :cloud9:

Nalfein: *from somewhere in the ship* IT BUUUUUUURRRRRNNNSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!
rampant

10-30-06, 01:44 AM		Sithis - I hate paper work.

Sithis is hunched over a questionaire, the document asks for current capabilities and for what the student wishes to learn.
-------------------------

Kale?
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-30-06, 08:16 AM		Bunny: Hey, Lion King reference.

13: Notice that this has become less "The Adventures of the Forgotten Freedom" and more "The Adventures of the Crew of the Forgotten Freedom, only it features a whole lot of people who aren't crew"?

Silver: Well, we've tried to put interest back in pirating, but so far only Chanse Random has taken it up.

Bunny: And while he means well, he's just not filling up the quota.

13: Hmmm, if there's not much going on here why don't we go down to Erk's place? Haven't had anything happen there in a while.

Silver: Yeah. I can see if Sakura and Saberiel have gotten together yet.

OOcat: You do realize that future sequence was a joke, right? :bored:

Silver: :devil:

13: I'm actually interested in how Weylin is doing.

Silver: You know, that's right, he's Lisa's half-brother, and Sarah and Elina's uncle, you'd think OOKaizer would pick that up. ( ;) )

13: Hey! I just remembered is "Really Bad Song" night.
Charles Phipps

10-30-06, 02:13 PM		Michael: Actually, Sakura is with some paladin named Parn.

Sabriel: How...HOW COULD SHE DO THIS!?

Michael: Sab...

Sabriel: In love with a man!? It's UNNATURAL!

Michael: ....this ship really doesn't help my love life. Also, there's always the justification that the ship causes realty to alter so dropped plotlines like relatives vanish.
rampant

10-30-06, 02:34 PM		Deedlit - Parn whos this?

Parn - This is Sakura she's the daughter of a pirate lord and pontiff to a major religion.

Sakura Jarlot - You forgot i'm also a magical girl ninja.

Deedlit - Ok:confused: what she doing here?

Parn - We're eloping!

Deedlit - YOU BASTARD!:weep: :mad:
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-30-06, 03:48 PM		Michael: ....this ship really doesn't help my love life.
Silver: ………………………………:lightbulb I need Lucky and a superhero costume, STAT!
Gladius_Lucix

10-30-06, 03:52 PM		Liam: ... and that should do it. Everything should be in working order, Sparky.

Sparky: Looks good. You've been at this for a few weeks, you know. Are you sure you're okay?

Swarm: It's a special Mad Scientist ability, Delay Biological Needs. It let's him work for weeks straight, until the project is done. Then all the missed sleep and meals come crashing down on him.

Liam: I Don'T FeeL So gOOd.

*Ka-thump!*

The Swarm lifts Liam on a few stacked rolls.

Swarm: Could you direct me to the cafeteria?
rampant

10-30-06, 04:22 PM		Sparky - Up the stairs and left till you hit the plaza. There's a map you can use there. Careful its mol, the chili is fresh.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-30-06, 04:43 PM		Bunny: Considering how "Fresh" the chilli on the FF is and how much Satnak likes it…………………I got nothing.
Charles Phipps

10-30-06, 05:29 PM		Rose: Sheesh, I'm getting a little sick of the Pirate complaints.

13: Maybe you should actually DO SOME PIRATING.

Rose: May I offer a point...

13: Can I stop you?

Rose: How many of the ship's crew are PIRATES?

13: Errr...

Rose: Kanatash is a world destroying Kalashtar, Terra is a drug dealing druid, Termek is....Termek, Satnak is....I don't know what the hell she is, Lisa is a paladin, Michael is a schizophrenic BlackGuard/Lawful Goodie two shoes, the teenagers onboard are just anime kids in training, and Ketler is too busy watching Battlestar Galactica to do anything.

13: Well it is a Pirate ship...

Rose: YES AND BOTH *I* and *CAPTAIN JARLOT* are the only two PIRATES ONBOARD! Maybe someone should have noted that when taking applications for crew!

Admiral Jarlot Sr: Don't forget me! I remember when all I had was a lash, some rum, and a desire to bugger every crew member in the Navy!

Rose: :stare: Uh...huh.

00Crystalforged Well in Skies of Arcadia...

Rose: ....oh hell. FINE, you want pirating. YOU'LL GET PIRATING!

OOKaizerRyu: Weren't you the one who established the diary series that says the crew actually does a GREAT DEAL of Pirating and its just all off camera?

Rose: Yes but apparently nobody remembers that!

Zella: You don't have to do this to impress me.

Rose: Quiet. You have to be Fina. I'll be Vyke.

OOKaizerRyu: This is all because Final Fantasy 12 is coming out isn't it?
Charles Phipps

10-30-06, 05:43 PM		Day 1 of Rose's Great Pirating Crusade

Rose: This will show that Lousy Jarlot whose the greatest pirate in the world!

*A ghostly form of Jarlot appears*

Jarlot: Don't give into anger Luke, that way leads to the Dark side.

Rose: Isn't this Star Wars thing getting a little old?

Jarlot: Nope and it's more a Battlestar Galactica thing now.

Rose: Then you'd be a hot blonde android.

Jarlot: Ketler's got me hooked on it. I like Starbuck though more than sexaroid.

Rose: I prefer Boomer personally.

Jarlot: In any case, there's no way that you'll ever be able to become as great a pirate as me.

Rose: And why's that?

Jarlot: Because I deliberately rigged the crew to have no interest in money, plunder, or women. Why do you think so much of the crew is female and interetsed in one another?

Rose: You were using the videos to sell the porn in after midnight commercials.

Jarlot: That too. But you'll NEVER suceed. Thus, will I remain the greatest pirate in the world.

Rose: Hey, Lisa!

Lisa: Yes?

Rose: I've declared war on Breland, Aundair, and Karrnath.

Lisa: WHAT?!

Rose: Well, SOMEONE got the three monarchs judging the beauty pageant drunk...not too difficult....and then suggested they all team up to take out Thrane. There was a huge invasion and now the country is under the occupation of the Three Nation alliance. The Church of the Silver Flame has been outlawed and the Royal Family is fugitives.

Lisa: Noooo....

Rose: So I'm now going to raid their shipping in eventual hopes of overthrowing the evil.

Lisa: THAT IS ONLY JUST! As a Princess of Thrane, I declare you LORD ADMIRAL OF THE FREE NAVY OF THRANE!! TO ARMS!

Rose: Righto.

*Lisa draws her sword and charges off*

Jarlot: Was any of that true?

Rose: I dunno. If it wasn't true, by the time it reaches the Intelligence agencies, someone will make it true. After that I have the excuses of raiding slavery, stopping Imperialism, overthrowing the Riedran government of evil, stopping the undead of the Deathless...

Jarlot: You are so evil.

Rose: Michael guarantees I don't show up as it.

*The Forgotten Freedom slams into a Breland Merchant ship carrying arms*

Rose: HI HO!

Marish: Hmmm?

*Rose swings across the decks and slams face first into the mast of the enemy ship*
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

10-30-06, 06:03 PM		Rose: Sheesh, I'm getting a little sick of the Pirate complaints.
....
Rose: YES AND BOTH *I* and *CAPTAIN JARLOT* are the only two PIRATES ONBOARD! Maybe someone should have noted that when taking applications for crew!


Chanse Random "The nerve of you! Ive perfomed more thevery, rapscalionisim and Piracy on this thread than you, you over grown gutless- Forget that, my sidekicks have perfomed more piracy than you! Atleast Jarlot acted like a pirate. Besides Im captain we had a mutany and you still haven shown that your better than I am, not that making someone with Airstep sandals walk the plank achives more than tiring the poor thing out!"

Ash "And he has more sucess with the ladies than you, I mean you quite literaly need a mask to get a date"

Chanse Random "Yeah! Im geting truly :censored: sick of that... Wait, since when did the Inhumane Torch side with Spoony?"

Ash "I have a system, side with the world aginst Spoony, with spoony aginst you, and feel free to annoy both of you on my own time. What can I say? Sibling rivalry bites."
Charles Phipps

10-30-06, 06:19 PM		Rose: Oh, I'm sorry Chanse. I keep forgetting you exist.

Chanse: *Emo Pirate tear*
Charles Phipps

10-30-06, 06:20 PM		Day 2 of Rose's Big Pirating Crusade

*More Movie Parodies ahead*

Just outside the National Gold Depository of House Kundarak

*Rose and Michael are wearing black business suits while holding hand held crossbows*

Rose: So, I hear you're taking Aerith out.

Michael: At Jarlot's request.

Rose: You met Aerith yet?

Michael: No.

*Rose laughs*

Michael: What's so fracking funny?

Rose: You'll see.

Michael: Look, I'm not stupid. It's the Big Man's wife. I'm gonna sit across from her, chew my food with my mouth closed, laugh at her fracking jokes, and that's it.

Rose: Yeah, whatever man.

MichaelIn any case, it was your idea to hit this place?

Rose: Yeah, it's the transfer of the tribute payments to King Steve. He tries to get it in land from the Dwarves so he can drill for Dragonshards.

Michael: You don't drill for Dragonshards.

Rose: YOU tell him that. Guys a frickin moron.

Michael: I used to be his chauffer before I became part of the crew of the FF. I took him to Aundair. He demands I get him a Quarter Pounder...in AUNDAIR. You know what they call a... a... a Quarter Pounder with Cheese in Aundair?

Rose: They don't call it a Quarter Pounder with cheese?

Michael: No man, they got the metric system. They wouldn't know what the frack a Quarter Pounder is.

Rose: Then what do they call it?

Michael: They call it a Royal with Cheeze. We should have heavy crossbows for this kind of deal.

Rose: How many up there?

Michael: Three or four.

Rose: That's countin' our guy?

Michael: Not sure.

Rose: So that means there could be up to five guys up there?

Michael: It's possible.

Rose We should have fracking heavy crossbows. So how did you meet Sakura anyway and won't she be ticked about you seeing Aerith?

Michael: No, she's cool. Well, the way they make shows is, they make one show. That show's called a pilot. Then they show that show to the people who make shows, and on the strength of that one show they decide if they're going to make more shows. Some pilots get picked and become television programs. Some don't, become nothing. She starred in one of the ones that became nothing.

Rose: Right. Let's get into character.

*They kick down the door and start shooting crossbows into dwarves left and right, Michael draws his sword and does a limit break. There's more like 20-30 dwarves before Rose pulls out a Mandaloin and summons hordes of screaming berserkers that tear through everyone. The only one left alive is Doog whom is shaking over a case*

Doog: Uhhhh guys, I didn't mean to go behind Jarlot's back on this matter....

Rose: What does Captain Jarlot look like?

Doog What?

Rose: What country you from?

Doog: What?

Rose:: What ain't no country I ever heard of! They speak English in What?

Doog: What?

Rose: COMMON, MOTHERFRACKER! DO-YOU-SPEAK-IT?

Doog Yes! Then you know what I'm saying!

Rose: Describe what Captain Jarlot looks like!

Doog: He's tall, smelly, has long hair....he's covered in tatoos that say obscene lyrics to the Village People...

Rose: Does he look like a gnome? * Rose shoots Doog in shoulder* DOES HE LOOK LIKE A GNOME!?

Doog: NO!

Rose: Then why you try to frack him like a gnome Doog?

Doog: I didn't.

Rose: Yes you did. Yes you did, Doog. You tried to frack him. And Jarlot don't like to be fracked by anybody, except Mrs. Jarlot.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-30-06, 06:23 PM		OOC: View this before the guy changes his avatar:
http://www.atomicthinktank.com/viewtopic.php?t=20276
Everyone Batdance!
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-30-06, 06:36 PM		Rose: Sheesh, I'm getting a little sick of the Pirate complaints.

13: Maybe you should actually DO SOME PIRATING.

Rose: May I offer a point...

13: Can I stop you?

Rose: How many of the ship's crew are PIRATES?

13: Errr...
All of them.

Rose: Exactuuwaht?

13: Except for the ones that are ninja-pirate. And that's only two.

Rose: :confused: How did you arrive at the conclusion that they're all pirates?

13: Because…

*the music FX demon starts opening bars of a ballad*

13: …beeeeiiiiiiiing a piiiiirrrrrraaaaaate is a staaaaate of miiiiiiiiiiind………

Rose: Oh, great, a muscial number. :rolleyes:

*music changes to rock*

13: …that says :censored: you, world, I'm doin' my own thing!

Rose: Your point?

*music ends*

13: Tell me that there is someone on this crew that doesn't fit that definition, that isn't a pirate in their soul and just doesn't act on their full being.

Rose: :mad: You're just making it up as you go along.

13: Like that's ever stopped any of us. :P
Charles Phipps

10-30-06, 06:47 PM		Day 3 of the Rose Crusade for Piracy

At King's Citadel Headquarters

Jacob Hunter: I want you to talk. I want to know about the secret head of the Forgotten Freedom.

Spoony Bard: The DA gave me immunity.

Jacob Hunter: Not from me. You get no immunity from me, you piece of shavit. Every criminal I have put in prison, every cop that owes me a favor, every creep and scumbag that walks the streets for a living will know the name of Spoony Bard. Now you talk to me, or that precious immunity they seem so fit to grant you won't be worth the paper the contract put out on your life is printed on.

Spoony Bard: Okay, Okay. Who do you want to know about?

Jacob Hunter: Tell me about....Kaizer Ryu.

Spoony Bard: Who is Kaizer Ryu? He is supposed to be Lhazaar. Some say his father was Karrnath. Nobody believed he was real. Nobody ever saw him or knew anybody that ever worked directly for him, but to hear Bruce Ki tell it, anybody could have worked for Ryu. You never knew. That was his power. The greatest trick the Keeper ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist. And poof. Just like that, he's gone.

Jacob Hunter: Well I've got sixteen dead Aurrum businessmen down in the harbor, a payment of 3 million sovereigns missing, and a lot of questions. So your answers better be good Spoony.

Spoony Bard: Back when I was picking beans in Xen'drick, we used to make fresh coffee, right off the trees I mean. That was good. This is shavit but, hey, I'm in a police station.

*Jacob grabs Spoony and throws him on the desk*

Jacob Hunter: TALK!

Spoony Bard: You tell me, Agent Hunter, if I told you the Tarrasque of Loch Karrn hired me to hit the harbor, what would you say?

Jacob Hunter: Just tell me who he is and where we can find him.

Spoony Bard: I'll tell you a story, one day, Kaizer is sitting at home when some local toughs kidnap his wife and kids. They're names are Terra, Elina, and Sarah. Then the gang to show they're serious offs Elina. Kaizer kills them himself to show he'd rather not deal with a hostage crisis. He waits until his wife and kids are in the ground and then he goes after the rest of the mob. He kills their kids, he kills their wives, he kills their parents and their parents' friends. He burns down the houses they live in and the stores they work in, he kills people that owe them money. And like that he was gone. Underground. Nobody has ever seen him since. He becomes a myth, a spook story that criminals tell their kids at night. "Rat on your pop, and Kaizer Ryu will get you." And no-one ever really believes. Jarlot always said, "I don't believe in God, but I'm afraid of him." Well I believe in God, and the only thing that scares me is Kaizer Ryu.

Jacob Hunter: Do you have an address?

Spoony Bard: RIght here.

***

Kaizer Ryu's house

*A bunch of King's Citadel break through the window and grab him at the computer*

***

Outside the Police Station

*Spoony stops walking with a limp*

Michael: Man, Kaizer is going to be ticked when he finds out you've been using his name.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-30-06, 07:02 PM		Thorn, El Spooño, and several other Alt-Roses sit at a back table in Erk's Place talking in hushed but excited tones.

Lucky (serving at the bar): At least they're buying drinks.

Saberiel (returning with drink orders): I still don't like it. There's already a contest going to on to decide the next captain, and Random will likely make a bid for it anyway.

JJ (leaning on bar with glass in hand): What, you think they're going to pull something? Sure, if they were Jarlots I could see it.

NJ26 (unseen voice): I think we just have yet to see Rose's competant side.

JJ: Ha! Always rescuing his wife, that's why.

Lucky: Come on, times have changed. The ship's got a ton of well-trained individuals aboard. It'd take a miracle to upset the chain of command.
rampant

10-30-06, 07:21 PM		Doog - Chain ... Of ... Command:lightbulb
------------------------------------------------

13 - This is gonna be good:plotting:

Bunny - And its all gonna end in blood :plotting: ... Awww shavit.

Silver - what now?

Bunny - Song just thumped out hate.

Silver - Its weird being in on the same thing with you like this.

Bunny - Creepy as Serene's "for Satnak" wardrobe?
--------------------------------------------

Satnak - (in a cheerleader out fit) Did you steal this from Ketler?

Serene - :angelhide
------------------------------------------

Silver - ... Not any more.

13 - Satnak with pom-poms :mymy: must clean brain with acid and steel wool...Right after I inflict this on someone.
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-30-06, 07:49 PM		13 - …:mymy: must clean brain with acid and steel wool...
13: This is an unfare characterization: there is nothing you can subject me to that I cannot stand up to mentally. Be glad I don't send in my lawyer.
*********
Naggat: Character-nazi senses tingling……
*********
13: But I'll let you off with a warning this time, since you obviously did it in the spirit of humor. I'll simply consider it my expressing of the feeling other people are going to have rather than my own thoughts.
**********
Naggat: Huh, it's gone. Must have been the apple juice.
**********
Bunny: Plus our lawyer is OOcat.

OORampant: Oooohhhhhh, I'm soooooooooo scared. :P

Bunny: You've never had to sit in on one of it's philosophical conversations. *shudder*

13: Now those hurt by brain.
rampant

10-30-06, 08:10 PM		OOC: Sorry got a little carried away.
-------------------------------------------

Welcome back to the 1st annual beauty pangeant.

Annonuncer - Our next contestant is Chalky.

Chalky walks on stage in a simple red dress, e has shifted into a squirrel girl.

Announcer - If you're made captain what will you do? please dont eat me

Chalky - I'll institute soylent green wednesdays and give you a head start.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-30-06, 09:37 PM		OOC: Kaizer Souse -> Kaizer Ryu :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: I can't believe I didn't think of that. Brilliant. :D

I wanted to do this back during the "Favorite Costumed Hero" night at the bar, but the necessary characters were unavailable, so, just for the hell of it, here we go.

IC:

Sarah: C'mon, you have to!

Tirmek: In this?

Elina: Why not? You look great in green.

Tirmek: Isn't this outfit a little...much?

Sarah: That's the point!

Tirmek: I still can't beleive you two got me to go along with this even to this point...

Elina: Will you do it?

Tirmek: I don't kn-

Sarah & Elina: :bigeyes: :bigeyes:

Tirmek: ...oh, allright. Just this once. And you two owe me.

Sarah: :D Sweet! Now for our big entrance!

Elina: One moment. *Kitsune mindblade - form: Kero-chan* There.

The door to Erk's Place opens up, and in a puff of FX-Demon smoke, this (http://www.fortunecity.com/marina/jamaica/211/images/Card%20Captor%20Sakura%20group-004.jpg) is what appears. Kitsune (as Kero-chan) is somehow flitting about the group.

Kitsune: Koyonachiwaaaa!

Lucky: :bored: I take it your Entity likes Card Captor Sakura.

Elina: :D Yep. This catgirl outfit is just so adorable!

Tirmek: *sigh* Wouldn't Lilly be better for Li Syaoran?

Sarah: :D It's nowhere near as fun as this.

Tirmek: *groan*

Elina: Maybe we should have gotten someone to be Tomoyo?

Jaela Jarlot: *starry cow-eyes with video camera and wearing a school girl outfit* KYAAAAAAAA!!!!! You're so cute, Elina-chan!

Elina: *anime sweatdrop*

Sarah: :rolleyes: I guess that problem solved itself...

Saberiel & NJ26: :love: :cloud9: Kawaiiiiiiiiiii!!!! :love: :cloud9:
urial angel of death

10-30-06, 10:13 PM		Volrath stumbles into Erk's Place. He looks utterly exhausted and shaken up.

Volrath: She demands hush-puppies! *faints*

--------
Kerrith is once again wandering the halls hopelessly lost. He comes upon Terrek.

Kerrith: *bows* I apologize most revered chosen one. I had no idea that Sanctus had selected a new vessel. I would have made the pilrimage if I had known.
Charles Phipps

10-30-06, 10:15 PM		OOC: Glad you liked it Kaizer.

:-)

And it was The Usual Suspects.
rampant

10-31-06, 12:19 AM		OOC: :heehee Kaizer that was spit milk out your nose funny... Glad i managed to miss my computer. Also don't worry about the kids being on or off the island, just assume its happening off-screen and only worry about it if something special is going down.
------------------------------------------------

Terrek - (i.h.h. crazy boy talking to me, move back slowly and don't make eye contact)
-------------------------------------------------

Izzy - Hello! is anyone gonna feed me? water me? i need to go to the bathroom.:allalone:
cypher_zero

10-31-06, 01:36 AM		TerreK: I know naught of this Sanctus or any so-called vessel. Explain yourself boy.
.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-31-06, 02:32 AM		OOC: :heehee Kaizer that was spit milk out your nose funny...Much obliged. And I'm glad you missed, too. I didn't want to owe anyone a new keyboard. ;)

This, ladies and gentlemen, demonstrates the potential of basing an entire post around a picture you found at random. :D Seriously. I had the general idea for the three of them as Sakura, Meling, and Syaoran, but other than that, nothing. Until I found that picture. Then it all just kind of clicked. I was giggling the whole time.

Terra: You have an unhealthy obsession with Kinomoto Sakura, you know?

OOKaizer: :mad: I do not!

Lisa: You have the entire anime, both movies, at least three posters, and Flame knows how many of the manga.

OOKaizer: :tantrum: It's not unhealthy!

Terra: What's up with the pure joy, anyway?

OOKaizer: :rant: I can't help it! She's too adorable for words! How can you see her and not feel happy?!

Lisa: :rolleyes: I am so glad you didn't bring us to that universe.

Terra: We're taking away your shojo and magical girl stuff again.

OOKaizer: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! !!
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-31-06, 07:11 AM		Silver: Aren't Sakura and Lee—

OOKaizer: NINE!
rampant

10-31-06, 11:15 AM		Tirmek - I don't understand, Mabareen is a time of contemplation. A time to commune with the spirits of darkness, See my melds they're buzzing with messages from the spirits. What does any of this have to do with costumes or candy?

Elina - Stop talking, otherwise you'll mess up the dye.

Tirmek - (i.h.h. I can't believe the stupid stunts they talk me into.)

Sarah - I have a map ready the places we hit are marked in orange, the places pushing granola are marked in red, the ones in blue are gonna get tp'd just because I don't like them. Is he almost done?

Elina - Just gotta make sure he doesn't muss the orange dye before it sets.

Tirmek - (i.h.h. Just who is this Long character anyway?)
------------------------------------------------------------

OOC: cookie to whoever gets it first
SilvercatMoonpaw

10-31-06, 05:06 PM		Sign on Erk's Place:
"Feast of the Dead"
"Come help us celebrate the day when the dead return from Dolurrh to visit the living."

Reasons to come:
"Drink our unique mixes named after types of undead (Or possibly because you become that type of undead after you die from drinking it. We really didn't read the recipies that carefully. :D)"
"Have an excuse to dress up in a costume other than what you normaly wear. (Please.) There will be a Costume Contest."
"Hear Errandis d'Vol and Sakura Jaela sing duet."
":coolcthul will be there, and he's bringing some friends."
"It's the one day a year when Aerenal elves are appropriately attired."
"Spot the Wanabes Contest: See how many different references you can spot among the Alt-Jarlots and -Roses. (Alt-Jarlots and -Roses are not allowed to compete.)"
"See how many characters from online comics, anime, and movies show up."
"Kantash and Caralot will be returning. (This would be a good reason to have one of the undead drinks on hand.)"

OOC: Everyone join in!
Charles Phipps

10-31-06, 06:23 PM		Ketler: I blame Kaizer_Ryu. Because he made their charisma's so high, like Jaela, we're just waiting for them to become legal.

OOCharles: We are not!
rampant

10-31-06, 07:11 PM		Estuans interius,
Ira vehementi,
Estuans interius,
Ira vehemnti,
Sephiroth!
Sephiroth!

Erk - where is that music coming from?

Estuans interius,
Ira vehementi,
Estuans interius,
Ira vehemnti,
Sephiroth!
Sephiroth!

NJ26 - If Ketler has been messing with the sound system, again...

Sors immanis,
Et inanis,
Sors immanis,
Et inanis,

Saberial - Aerith never liked this song.

Estuans interius,
Ira vehementi,
Estuans interius,
Ira vehemnti,
Sephiroth!
Sephiroth!

Jarlot - The scary man is taking over my mind again!

Veni, Veni, venias!
Ne me mori facias!
Veni, Veni, venias!
Ne me mori facias!

Rose - Don't worry, there's nothing to take over.

Veni, Veni, venias!
Ne me mori facias!
Veni, Veni, venias!
Ne me mori facias!

Mendova - This better not be another super-villian invasion.

Karyu no hanay kata!
Gloriosa!
Generosa!
Gloriosa!
Generosa!

Satnak (dressed as Aerith) - Was that necessary?

Serene (in a Sephiroth costume) - Its called making an entrance Silly girl.
urial angel of death

10-31-06, 07:27 PM		Kerrith: Are you not the prophet of Sanctus and blesser of the God Machines?

-----

Volrath: *waking up* P/Y/R is having the first of her irrational cravings. Please get me the hush-puppies.

Sabriel: What do you say?

Volrath: Now!

Sabriel: Alright, here you go.

Volrath: Thank you *runs*
cypher_zero

10-31-06, 08:53 PM		Kerrith: Are you not the prophet of Sanctus and blesser of the God Machines?
Terrek: Hardly. I serve no master but myself and in my realm I am master of all I survey; but tell me of this Sanctus. You have piqued my curiosity.
.
rampant

10-31-06, 09:05 PM		Redshirts - RuUUUUUUUN

Sarah - More eggs!

Elina - TP STRIKE!!

Tirmek (with orange dye over most of his body except for tiger stripes of his natural black) - Why am I ammo boy?
----------------------------

Izzy - I really need to go.
urial angel of death

10-31-06, 09:35 PM		Kerrith: Well that is a relief. I was worried that the current prophet had died.
Well Sanctus is the first son of the Creator and the All Mother. Santus is the god of all things created by living beings. He breaths life and angelic essence into the God Machines constantly being built by his tech priests. His clergy, the tech priests, take great delight in building magic item and animate constructed. Though unless the creation is a God Machine they usually abandon it shortly after its creation for new projects. The God Machines are enormous constructs either made to resemble angelic beings or aberrations or the creator's imagination. They are each given some special ability and sign by Sanctus upon completion.
Sanctus' teachings state that you should be self-sufficient and independent, but at the same time you should help those who are incapable of caring for themselves. Children are almost always in this category and thus the church of Sanctus stresses strong and caring family structure to support the children until they are capable of living on their own.
Sanctus just like his parents very rarely physically manifests. When he does it is only for matters of great importance. In fact he has only appeared three times in recorded history. Once when his father the Creator proclaimed the laws. Second during the Demonic invasion of the homeland. The third and final appearence was when he appointed the first prophet after the migration. His manifestation is always a giant humaniod form made of tower-like structures and gigantic sheets of mythril.
Kaizer_Ryu

10-31-06, 09:44 PM		Volrath bolts out of the bar, completely missing Terra, Lisa, Elina, and Sarah.

Terra: Well, that explains the terror/joy/exasperation feelings I've been getting.

Lisa: Shall we go?

Upon entering, the patrons see that the family is attired thusly:

Terra is garbed in a green leotard. A green elastic extends from her mid-upper arm to her wrist (I don't remember what these are called, sorry). From the back of each elastic extends a flowing translucent green silk. Her hair is bound up in a bun with a rose pin.

Lisa is likewise clothed in a green leotard, this time with a gold belt. She wears a flowing silver cape, her hair is dyed blonde and she has a silver headband/tiara holding it back. At her side, she carries the Sword of Sutekh.

Sarah wears tan khaki shorts and a dark green shirt cut off just above the belly button. Her left arm is covered by a brown shield covering, her right has a black glove extending to her elbow. On her back she carries a GIGANTIC shuriken. Her hair is dyed black and pulled into two tight ponytails in the back.

Elina is wearing a black sleeveless shirt and white pants. A red cape is clasped around her neck. Her hair is dyed blonde and largely covered by a red cap. On her belt is a paintbrush.

Satnak: Seems we're not the only ones doing a Final Fantasy motif...

Terra: Isn't that a little...inappropriate?

Satnak: Oh, come on. You know as well as I do Aerith would get a kick out of this.

Lisa: Not you.

Serene: What? Legendary swordsman and psychotic killer doesn't fit me? :D

Terra: Did you have to do the sword as well?

Serene: Yes.

Ketler: Hey, Elina! Want some candy?

Elina: You know, Ketler, I should paint your picture.

Everyone but Ketler: :eek: NOOOOOOO!!!! :eek:

Ketler: :confused:

OOC: If anyone can name who each of my characters is dressed as, they get a :lop: plushie.
cypher_zero

10-31-06, 09:48 PM		Terrek: And you belived me to be his prophet? I can see why, though you are mistaken. Tell me child, where do you hail from? You appear as a drow... but most of those in this realm are savages...
.
rampant

10-31-06, 10:05 PM		Terra - Rdyia of the mist, ff6

Sarah - Yuffie, ff7 Kh kh2

Elina - Arroway, ff6

Lisa - terra branford, ff6

I read Captain SNES I'm not gonna miss Rydia.

Anyone figured out where Tirmek's Long is from yet?
urial angel of death

10-31-06, 10:06 PM		OOC: The are Terra=Terra, Lisa=Celes(sp), Sarah=Yuffie, and Elina=Relm. I win.

IC: Kerrith: I come from the realm of Mistia and which is by the looks of it on an entirely different world.
rampant

10-31-06, 10:09 PM		Terrek - Well no frigging duh!

Tirmek - Sometimes its good to be ammo boy.:D

Kerrith - Oh crap!

Tirmek proceed to pelt Kerrith with whole egg cartons.
Charles Phipps

10-31-06, 10:47 PM		Rose: Well I *AM* Edward but no one will ever find out.

Aerith: *YAWN* Ah, finally regenerated.

Rose: GAH! It's impossible!

Aerith: WHat?

Rose: The fans whom said you had a secret code for ressurection were right!
Kaizer_Ryu

10-31-06, 10:47 PM		OOKaizer: OORampant is right for Terra (Rydia is FFIV, though), Sarah, and Elina (Relm Arroway, so I'll let it go). Urial was right for Lisa, Sarah, and Elina. You both only got three, so no plushie. ;) :P

OORampant: :mad: Not cool.

OOUrial: :mad: Jerk.

Rose: The fans whom said you had a secret code for ressurection were right!
Aerith: :rolleyes: All you need is a Game Shark. But you can never switch me out of the party, I don't show up in any major scenes, and I have...like...two lines at most after that.

OOKaizer: *starry cow eyes while drooling*

Aerith: Do you have to do that?

OOKazier: *nods vigorously*
Charles Phipps

10-31-06, 11:23 PM		Rose: I could be Squall ya know.

Jarlot: Awww isn't that cute. Someone wants to play the whipped rip off of Cloud.

Rose: Squall is not whipped!

Zella: *As Rinoa* Ohhhh ROOOSSEEEE!

Rose: *fires Gunsword into Jarlot-Cloud's face*

Meanwhile

Rinoa Achika Heartlily: Yes, me and Rose got along splendidly at the Academy. Right before the whole Sorceress thing caused us to leap into bed prematurely. Then Lilly was born....named after me of course.
rampant

11-01-06, 01:26 AM		Izzy - I call Genova violation, I really gotta go:weep:
Charles Phipps

11-01-06, 05:41 AM		Aerith: AH, I wonder what happened in the four years I've been gone.

Doog: GAH! IT'S THE PINK LADY FROM HELL! RUN!

*Andrea in a bikini sunbathing on deck with her copy of Mortis De Libre*

Andrea: Oh hi Aerith.

Aerith: The Forgotten Freedom sure hasn't changed much.

Elin: Who the hell are you?

Aerith: I'm Aerith.

[b]Elin[b]: Ridiculous! Sephiroth killed you!

Aerith: I got better.

Elin: That invalidates the whole of Advent Children!

Aerith: The movie was just an excuse for more CGI martial arts than Episode III and the Matrix put together.

Andrea: This is Elin and Sarah.

Aerith: Lisa's daughters with Michael?

Andrea: No, Terra.

Aerith: But....

Andrea: So many have said.

Rose: Ah, another bright and beautiful pirating m...OH SWEET TRAVELLER!

Aerith: Edward, is that you?

Rose: ***k! Ummm...*leaps overboard*

Andrea: That's Rose, he's our new Captain.

Aerith: :twitch: You made the *BARD* Captain? Where's Jarlot?

Andrea: No one's quite sure. I tend to think he's hiding in the Lower Decks. No one goes there.

Elin: WHERE IS YOUR LOVE OF STORY! Cloud's true love is Tiffa!

Aerith: Where is Tiffa anyway?

Andrea: I hear she's starring in a new Jet Li movie.

Aerith: So what about Kanatash.

Andrea: Just got married.

Aerith: :twitch: Satnak?

Andrea: Also married.

Aerith: What about Sakura!?

Andrea: Married a young man.

Aerith: Sakura married a BOY!??

Andrea: Yes, Lilly's older double.

Aerith: Whose Lilly?

Andrea: Rose's child with Achika. He's a half-metal paladin with the soul of his dead brother tied to a warforged. They're questing for the Philosopher's Stone to win Elin and sarah's heart.

Aerith: THEY'RE NINE!
urial angel of death

11-01-06, 07:10 AM		Volrath: *as he runs past Aerith on his way to P/Y/R * My game's better.

OOC: I'll finish up Izzy in a little bit.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-01-06, 08:50 AM		Saberiel: *glompfs Aerith* :weep:

Lady: Ma! :D

OOcat: No comedy here, folks. Actual tearful reunion.

Silver: Plus she's better for Aerith than Spoony or Batman. :rimshot:
Chrys

11-01-06, 09:23 AM		Is Tirmek the 'Good' Weretiger from Bloody Howl [or what ever that were beast fighting game was called... the weremole was so cooler]?

Hmmm WereMole ;)

Bloom: So when are you going to finish your silly story...

OoChrys:... I have done 4 rewrite... and played through the worst RPG sence FF8 [all plot no game!] :ahem: So don't push me! {I hate Valkykeir Profile 2! SHOPS SHOULD NOT RUN OUT OF STUFF!!}

Bloom: So this has nothing to do with FF12 comming out :confused:

OoChrys:... Oh I havn't even picked it up yet... I have more important stuff to do then drive and hour to pick up a game on the 31st... Like watch Rocky Horror Picture show...
Kaizer_Ryu

11-01-06, 10:32 AM		Lisa: Welcome back.

Aerith: Good to be back.

Terra: Reacclimated yet? Or still in shock?

Aerith: Whoa, you have changed...

Terra: :D Ten years and becoming a parent will do that.

Aerith: Not what I meant. This was not the path I expected from you. How did-

Terra: Not a word.

DUN Dun DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNN

*bricks and sharp objects are thrown at Devon*

Aerith: Ok... Next question. How is it that you two have children together? I always figured Michael would "help out" in that department.

Lisa: Am I the only one creeped out that his own mother is talking like that?

Aerith: :embarrass What? I can't expect grandchildren?

Terra: Honestly, I don't think you want to know.

Aerith: I think I can guess. I remember you have tentacles...

Lisa: While wonderful fun, that's not how.

Terra: Lisa got me pregnant first.

Aerith: :blink: But that...it doesn't...how could...:twitch: Never mind. You're right, I don't want to know.

Lisa & Terra: :D

Saberiel: The only relationship that has traumatized the crew more than theirs is Kanatash and Caralot's.

Aerith: :eek: HE MARRIED CARALOT?!?!?!

Saberiel: Confounding, isn't it? Seems their relative psychotic tendencies compliment each other.

Lisa: Not to mention she has him completely whipped.

Aerith: Thus explaining why Kol Korn keeps making whipping noises.

Terra: I think that's more in regards to Satnak.

Aerith: :twitch: Satnak is whipped, too?

Lisa: It's adorable to watch, actually. You'll love Serene. *sees Sarah and Elina* Oh, girls! Come here a moment.

Sarah: Wow. You're pretty.

Aerith: :D Thank you.

Elina: ...

Terra: What's the matter, dear?

Elina: I...I hear singing! This is the first time I've actually heard singing from a spirit! I can't hear them crying anymore...

Terra: :rolleyes: Must be that insufferable cheerfulness.

Aerith: Yours?

Lisa: :D Indeed. This one is Sarah-

Sarah: Hi!

Lisa: -and Elina.

Elina: Hi...

Aerith: Oh, they're just precious! Here, dears, I'll give you the first of my new Snapple Potions.

Sarah: *slurp* These are great!

Elina: Everyone's always drinking Micky's, but they smell icky. These are awesome!

Aerith: What did Elina mean about hearing songs?

Terra: She was still inside me when I reached the beginning of my current state. The resulting exposure has granted her the ability to see, hear, and commune with souls and spirits. She can't control it very well yet, so it can cause problems for her at times. It's one of the reasons she decided on Spirit Shaman. Kitsune helps her block out much of it.

Lisa: Something else to keep in mind. You'll see two girls walking around that look like older versions of our girls. That's Sara and Elin. They're future alternates of these two.

Aerith: What is it with this ship and alternates? ...oh, wait, chaos magic. Never mind.
rampant

11-01-06, 10:40 AM		:cookie: for Chrys

and its bloody roar
---------------------------

Izzy - I really gotta go:weep:

----------------------------

Aerith - So Satnak is - :mymy:

Satnak - Behind you

Aerith - Is that one of my ... Wait a minute you're wearing a dress?

Serene - Isn't she cute:D

Aerith - :shocked: ... I guess you would be the type to fall for a murdurous psychotic bishi.

Serene - You caught us in the middle of a costume party.

Aerith - Oh :embarrass

Satnak - This is my wife Serene.

Aerith - Lemme guess the Little tiger boy running around is yours?

Serene - No thats her nephew, he goes to school with Elina and Sarah, he just spends most of his free time here.

Satnak - We are expecting though.
----------------------

Silver and Bunny - *ping* Intellect mugged ambition.
rampant

11-01-06, 11:16 AM		Serene - Hun could you go get us some drinks?

Satnak - Sure babe, what do you want?

Serene - A Vampire for me.

Aerith - Um Eternal Soldier.

Terra - Ghast

Lisa - Barrow Wight

Satnak - Be right ba-OH (as Serene nibbles on her ear)

Serene - Remember your carrying, no alcohol.

Satnak - Right, love. (heads toward the drink table)

Aerith - :OMG! (telepathy to terra - wow she is whipped)

Terra - ( and loving every minute of it :D )
----------------------------------------------------

Kol Korn - WHPISH
Gladius_Lucix

11-01-06, 11:19 AM		A bunch of rolls of duct tape stacked in a vaguely humanoid shape wander into Erk's.

Swarm: Guess what classic movie monster I am!

----

The portion of the Swarm with Liam finally drags him to the Cafeteria, and takes him to the food line.

Swarm: What's the blandest thing you have here? My friend here's a little worn out from not eating or sleeping for a few weeks, and I don't think he can handle the Chili.
rampant

11-01-06, 11:34 AM		Server - Hmmmmmmm ah

Places a live rat on the plate.
Chrys

11-01-06, 11:57 AM		* Poof *

Sil: Where are we?
H: How should I know?
Len: Hey Look there is the FF!
H: It seem that we where just teleport out side
Len: that’s a relief…
Sil: Um… wow they really turned up the speed to come and get us…He He…
H: Yeah heh… if they don’t slow down they are going to zoom right past us.
Len: Um…It coming right at us!

* Smash! Crash! Spat! *

Johnny: Um Bloom… are you sure I was supposed to crash in to them they kind of looked…

Bloom: Don’t worry about it… Now just sort of scrap them off on that mountain over there. Now I have to find some one to burn them to a crisp.

* * *

Is the Swarm the Mummy? :rolleyes:
Gladius_Lucix

11-01-06, 12:12 PM		Is the Swarm the Mummy? :rolleyes:
Yup. That's what happens with five minutes preparation.

----
Server - Hmmmmmmm ah

Places a live rat on the plate.

Swarm: *sigh* Do you have any plain bread? Or do you just have live rats and live chili?
Lord Kale Fangblade

11-01-06, 12:14 PM		I thought i might as well do a write up for him, seeing as the wiki will need more information

Name: Sithis Arthas Brokenblade D'Vol
Race: Valenar Elf (Using Wood elf stats)/ Half-Fiend/ Half Dragon (Deep/Shadow/ Fang)/ Vampire Lord ( Sanguine Court*)/ Shadow Creature
Region of Origin: New Karranth
Plane/ Reality of Origin: An Alternate Eberron. Yr 2998 Yk.
Parents: Sa'vor Miska Brokenblade D'Vol and Empress Drusila Miranda Soulforged.
Class and Level: Warlock 5/ Warmage 5

* gives Evolved Undead Template, Swarm Form (Bat, Spider, Sand, Scorpion, Scarb beetle)
as well as Stat Boosts +2 Strength, +2 Dex, +2 Wis, +2 Int and +4 Charisma
rampant

11-01-06, 12:25 PM		Sithis - Hmmm Weaver (Arcanix) Looks right up my ally. Hmmm, Auras 101, Strategy, Advanced spell casting, Survival, Game theory, Logistics, Study hall

-------------------------

Server - Fine, whiny little homunculus.

Places a loaf of plain bread and a bowl of chicken broth on the tray. The rat is not happy.
Gladius_Lucix

11-01-06, 12:36 PM		Server - Fine, whiny little homunculus.

Places a loaf of plain bread and a bowl of chicken broth on the tray. The rat is not happy.

Swarm: Thank you. That wasn't so hard, was it?

The Swarm takes the tray and Liam to an out of the way table. It props Liam up and starts feeding him.
Chrys

11-01-06, 12:40 PM		Johnny: Bloom Can I ask you a question… why do you look different?

Bloom: There is a costume party so my entity probably put me in some stupid outfit… can this not wait I mean they might regenerate!

Johnny: I know about that I’m dressed like the Highwind for the flames sake. I was just say that you don’t seem have any legs and you have petals growing from your butt.

Bloom: What... Oh I’m just dressed as Belladonna from Disgaea 2… Not that bad all things considers at lest it not one of stupid cat girls.

OoChrys: You’re not only dressed as one, you are one… I got bored with the whole war forged kick I was going through. So I changed to one of the most annoying monsters from my favorite game… you should be luck I didn’t you flora butt in to a Prinny!

Bloom: Works for me… does that me I can be a Space Knight?

OoChrys: We’ll talk.

Johnny: Um… those people I hit a starting to twitch.

Bloom: Damn it!
urial angel of death

11-01-06, 12:47 PM		* Smash! Crash! Spat! *

Johnny: Um Bloom… are you sure I was supposed to crash in to them they kind of looked…

Bloom: Don’t worry about it… Now just sort of scrap them off on that mountain over there. Now I have to find some one to burn them to a crisp.

* * *

Is the Swarm the Mummy? :rolleyes:

You're a monster :weep:
Chrys

11-01-06, 12:53 PM		OoChrys: :P Hey I didn't kill them... yet. Plus this means that you can come up with ever kids you want for P/Y/R :D
Lord Kale Fangblade

11-01-06, 01:28 PM		Way Back when, Part One
New Karranth, Border lands with the Talenta Plains.
Battle of Broken Bodies, 2602 YK

A Black armoured man Rides into battle, His Black armour is expertly designed and on which many Runes of Many difficult and powerful languages glow with a red light. The Armours edging is Platinum and the wearer moves as if it wasnt even there. Across the belt area is a Crimson Sash with similar runes in black, the Sash radiates power. His Crimson Cloak Flutters out behind him, the Black Runes twisting and writhing along its edges.
A Crimson Hood with similar markings as the Cloak and Sash shadows the riders features, They're young and Beautiful beyond belife. his Alabaster skin bears no mars apart from a Necromantic rune above one eyebrow. his Violet eyes are hardened with hatred and anger,his Albaster hair is tied back from his face.

The Rider stares along the Long lines of Silver and White Clad Thranish armies, he Rides out alone. and his opposite, a shining silver armoured paladin with grey hair mirrors him. She's old, and her features are slightly strained. but firey difience burns deep in her silver eyes.
The Two Riders finaly become opposite each other, The Black Clad Riders huge Black Stallion paws at the ground slightly. The Black Rider bows his head to the Silver one

Black Rider: Lady Ismira, I didnot know that you yourself would be riding out today. It is a great honour to finaly meet you.

Lady Ismira: I can hardly say the same to you Vampire, You are a Monster in the eyes of the Silver Flame. but i awknowledge that you still hold to the Codes of Honour.

Black Rider: As you should. * He turns to ride away.*

Lady Ismira: One thing before you go, I wish to know your name.

Black Rider: * turning back to her* My name? do you not recognise me?

Lady Ismira: no, i do not.

Black Rider: I am Sa'vor D'Vol, Head of the Sanguine court and Leader of House Broken Blade.

Lady Ismira: The Empress would send her own Husband to fight us? She does us the honour of knowing that we would fight The Empresses chosen rather than another noble. But why would she send you rather than one of your sons?

Sa'vor: *slight Smirk* The Empress has Faith in me. As does your Cardinals and the Keeper have faith in you if they sent you to do battle. Hopefully you will do me the honour of being the one whom slays me.

Lady Ismira: Your Kin will fall before my Blade Vampire, your kind cannot be allowed to rule the Peasants.
* She turns and rides away.*

Sa'vor watches he go for a moment and then he himself turns and rides towards his ordered ranks. The Thranish Legions where far greater than the Armies of The Vampiric Counts, But unlike the Armies of the Undead. The Thranishs forces didnt grow with every loss.
Sa'vor smiled. this battle would be very intresting.
****

Sa'vor Rode down the Lines of Men . Vampiric Nobles Banners flapped in the breeze, Only Half of the Requested had turned up.
Sa'vor looked into the eyes of the Ranks of Karranthi Skeletons and Zombies, Wights, Vampire Spawn, The White Painfilled eyes of Curst, The Translucent Ones of Ghosts, The Red Pinpoints of Wraiths and the many mant eyes of various different variaties of Undead.

Sa'vor Watched as the Various Vampire Counts and Suzerains rode up to him. each wore extremly ornate Black armour, with various different Decorations.
Duke Morgan Soulforged was the first to reach Sa'vor, he was almost as tall as Sa'vor, his Black Armour was decorated with gold edging and his Symobl. a Black Dagger embedded clutched in the claws of a Black and Gold Egal, The Elfs eyes where the colour of Storms and his long black hair was cut short.

Duke Morgan: *raising his hand in the Valenar Greeting* May your Blade ever run with blood for the glorious Ancestors.

Sa'vor: *mirroring the gesture* May your Steed never fall and may your Battles be many.

Duke Morgan: Im sorry that None of the other houses sent their Lords, as you know House Soulforged will always be by your side.

Sa'vor: I've never doubted your loyalty nor your skill in battle Morgan, we still have the Advantage though.

Duke Morgan: I smell a Plan Sa'vor, How do we still have the Advantage?

Sa'vor: * evil grin* we can still see in the Dark.

Sa'vor made a clawed hand gesture at the Sun, and a black shape eclipsed it spreading darkness across the land. cries of confusion erupted from the ranks of the Thranish forces, Sa'vor nodded to each of the Lords.

Sa'vor: I want Counts Haverlock, Quell, Karrith to engage the Thranes from the Front. Suzerain Kallith, Count Orik and Duke Soulforged are going to Attack the right Flank. Suzerains Guar, Forvvor and Earl Stone Cutter are with me. Duke Wenwik and Suzerain Kellis are to engage the enemie from behind. *turns to Suzerain Kallith* Are Suzerain Tir and Count Ardis and their Scout forces set up on the rocks?

Suzerain Kallith: *lifting his hand to the sky, A Raven Lands on it. He takes the message from its leg* Indeed they are sir, the Spell Casters have also set up on the rocks. supposedly it gives them a better vantage point.

Sa'vor: Alright. Take your Positions men, once We're all ready i'll begin the Storm and the spell casters will set up the Darkness's over their archers. I dont want to lose too many men fighting this one.

Each of Lords nodded and rode towards their positions. Sa'vor Turned and faced his Heavy Cavalry, The Vampires and Mummy's turned their eyes on him.

Sa'vor: Each of you has bled for this land, a Land to call your home. a Land in which you and your brethren are safe from persecution. I personally have seen thousands of our kind fall to mobs before the Empress took over.
These Thranish dare challange our might? they Dare pillage the lands we protect? they Dare harm OUR people? they call it liberation? i Call it slavery.
* Raising his Double Bladed Scimitar* For The Empire! For Our Children! For Our Ancestors!

Sa'vor Turns his horse around as across the Ranks the Battle Cries go up, He Rides forth his blade blazing with Dark Fire. He Felt the desire for blood hit fever point in him, It had been soooo long since he'd last rode out to battle.
Sa'vor Raised the blade to the sky, and at once thunderclouds rolled over it. lightning flashed down and crashed into the ranks of Thranish men.
Sa'vor laughed as the Extacy of Magic filled his body, the Dark power surging within him Burned at his finger tips.
This was why he was a Warrior, Not for Honour, Not for His Ancestors but for this. The Dark Thrill of Battle.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-01-06, 03:44 PM		Rose is running, dressed in a green tunic, brown tights, and a pointed green cap with a red feather in it.

Rose: Thinkhappythoughts, thinkhappythoughts, thinkhappy—why the :censored: isn't this working?!

Maivy (dressed in the obviously associated costume): *tink*

They run past the Commentary Crew. Silver is dressed like a guy with short blond hair wearing blue-green coveralls. Bunny has a lightbulb on his head, hlding springs with hands on the end in his paws, and floating around in something that looks like one of those narrow-necked coffee mugs painted red. 13 has gold wire mesh between its ears and metal plating on its muzzle, plus two gold serving lids around its shoulders.

Bunny: So, have any plans for Aerith?

13: Wait for it…

Silver: Since when do I ever stop? :devil:

13: …wait for it…

Silver: Shouldn't you be fuming about how she's not dead anymore?

Bunny: In the spirit of the Day of the Dead I'm going to let her slide.

13: …wait for it…

Bunny: What are you—

Marish walks in holding two of her kittens, Jarlot's (OOcat: You still need to give it a name. :bored: ) and AWL. Cuddles is besides her.

Aerith: Eeeeeee! :D How cute!

Marish: Thank you. :blush:

Aerith: Are they yours? :mymy: It seems there's a baby-boom going on.

Silver: :D

Aerith: So is Jarlot the father?

13: You're taking it well? :confused: What's the point of going through all that if you don't get annoyed?

Marish: (holds up Jarlot's kitten) This one is, but his half-brother is Cuddle's.

Aerith looks at Cuddles.

Aerith: :mymy: :twitch:

13: Score!

Marish: And that's not all of them, there's also Cole, Ash's son, and Logan, the Wolverine ripoff son of Terrek.

OOC: I think someone else needs to continue this. I'm tapped out.
cypher_zero

11-01-06, 04:54 PM		Terrek pops in wearing a Dr. Doom costume and holding his son.

Terrek: Actually, his name really isn't Logan... I just thought it would be funny. His real name is Rashour. Now if you don't mind, I'll just be getting back to planning on taking over the world... But first I have to get rid of that meddlesome Richards! Bwahahaha!

*runs off crackling evily*

Serene: That's daddy... I think he's had one too many drinks...
.
urial angel of death

11-01-06, 04:58 PM		OOC Kale would you mind me adding to your way back when series?
Crystalforged

11-01-06, 07:47 PM		There is an ominous rumbling echoing across eberron. The sun finds itself eclipsed as all twelve moons leave their normal orbits to slide one by one in front of the sun. Darkness grows until the last moon slips into place leaving only a thin ring of light where the sun once shone plunging everything into twilight. In a sudden flash the color of the sun changes and now all is bathed in an erie crimson light. The very earth shakes as flaming rents open in the crust, echoing with sounds from the battle of the proginator wyrms themselves. The pall grows until- OW! That hurt *******it!

Dramadar: (holding a baseball bat) End this mortal or I will be forced to mete out more punishment upon you.

Fine, fine. Have it your way. A friggin portal opens up and Kanatash and Caralot step through it. Are you happy now?

Dramadar: Verily. (leaves)

(mumbles under breath) Now where was I... Oh yes! Stepping out of the portal into the Bar, the pair looks very much like they did before they left except for one thing-

Aerith: :eek: Kanatash is PREGNANT!

WILL YOU PEOPLE STOP INTERRUPTING ME!?

Aerith: :embarrass Sorry.

Right. Except for one thing, Kanatash's VERY noticable buldge around his stomach.

Kanatash: It's due within the week. :D
rampant

11-01-06, 08:34 PM		OORampant - :twitch:

Dramadar - I'll just be going now.

OORampant - I found my superscope:evillaugh:

Dramadar - :censored:
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-01-06, 08:41 PM		Caralot: *sigh* :(

Saberiel: Hey, what is it, Queen of Weird?

Caralot: Well, it's just that………oh, it's nothing. :raincloud

Saberiel: Come on, I'm your best friend, you can tell me anything. Especially things you can't tell your husband.

Caralot: :confused: Doesn't that mean you have to be my hairdresser?

Saberiel: Let's not get into details.

Caralot: ……………………… :( No, I don't think so. :allalone:

Saberiel: (i.h.h. Hmmm, what's it take to get her to crack?)

Aerith: Maybe I can add the expertise? :D

Caralot: Aerith? :eek:

Aerith: Yes, it's me! (radiant smile that destroys some of Andrea's undead)

Lady toddles up to Aerith and wraps her arms around her mother's leg.

Caralot: :twitch: ………………WAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! (breaks down into an uncontrollable sobbing fit)

Saberiel: What…………:mymy: Oh my.

As Kantash tries to comfort Caralot, who consists basically of wails and tears right now, Saberiel gains a clot of curious women.

NJ26: I heard you say it. Spill.

Saberiel: Caralot's had one daughter before that, but that was by another woman. Since then she hasn't exactly been chaste, if you get my drift. She's been Caralot.

Lucky: Hold on, she's been Caralot? As in obsessed with breeding?

Saberiel: I guess her obsession must have rubbed of onto her self-worth. She thinks she needs to bear a child at least once before she can feel completely vindicated.

Mendova: That's stupid: your impact on people is more important than how many brats you can pop out.

Saberiel: I agree with you, even as the mother of one of those "brats".

Mendova: Nothin' meant by it.

The group of women then goes over to enfold Caralot.

Saberiel: Ssssshhhhhh, baby, it'll be okay. You'll have one of your own.

Mendova: Something just occured to me: don't we know who controls all this?

Saberiel: Sure, we'll just walk up to the sales-clerk and order a custom model. :mad: No, Mendova, it's not right.

Mendova (actually shrinking back and looking less like her normal imposing self): :embarrass Sorry, I'm just trying to help.

Caralot: Huh, what? (stops crying) What's going on?

Saberiel: We know about your desire to carry your own child.

Caralot: That sounds silly. If I want that all I have to do is whip upa mix of my DNA and Kanatash's. I'm a hybrider, don't you think I know how to do that? :P It's not possible to pair every combination physically.

Saberiel: :blink: Oh…………Man, do I feel stupid.

Mendova: It's okay, we all make mistakes.

Lucky: But…all the crying?

Caralot: I foolishly took some testosterone to make sure I would "work" on Kanatash. They're just wearing off right now, so my estrogen is flooding back.

Mendova: Like I said: we all make mistakes.

Caralot: Guess there are some things Silver doesn't know about fertility.

Saberiel: Silver told you to do it? :confused:
*******
Erk: *raises one eyebrow*

Silver: What?
Charles Phipps

11-01-06, 09:28 PM		OOC:

ROFL at the radiant smile that destroys undead!
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-01-06, 10:18 PM		N+X: Thank our twisted gods we don't like in this world: {Humor}If everyone in the real world acted like the characters in our games.... (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=732120).
N+Y: Oh, wait, :censored:, we do.
N+Z: Someone is to go back through the thread and figure out what number rule we are on.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-01-06, 11:35 PM		OOC: I had to do this, it's just too funny not to.

IC:

Michael: (i.h.h.) Hmmmmm... Massive aura of goodness and love... It's not Lisa, it's beyond even her. Who then? Who else could possibly...? No...that's impossible. Don't even think about that. She's gone... :weep:

Aerith: *leaping tackle hug* MY LITTLE SHNOOKUMS!!!!! :cloud9:

Michael: *simultaniously* :shocked: :OMG! :D :eek: :twitch: :mymy: :w00t: :ghosted:

Aerith: :D How's my boy doing? It's just wonderful to see you again!

Michael: :twitch:

Aerith: What's the matter? No hello for your mommy? Oh! I know! You're so overwhelmed with joy that you've been rendered speechless! Oh, that's so sweet! *RIB CRUSHING HUG*

Picking him up, Aerith swings him around joyously as rainbows, unicorns, flowers, hearts and cute little woodland animals appear around her.

Michael: :twitch:

*meanwhile, nearby*

Sarah: Is she always like this?

Lisa: Only when she's holding back.

Elina & Sarah: :mymy:

Terra: You get used to it.

Light and happy orchestral music is now playing in the background. The unicorns and cute woodland creatures are backing away slowly as Aerith continues her dance of joy. Michael appears to have had a brain spasm.

Elina: You know...I can't help but notice that Momma and Aerith have at least three discerning features in common.

Terra: The powerful aura of good, the red hair, and the drop dead gorgeousness?

Elina: :embarrass Yeah.

Terra: Why do you think Michael was attracted to her in the first place?

Lisa: I'd rather not think about that, thank you...

Sarah: Ewwww...
rampant

11-02-06, 01:16 AM		Tirmek enters with a very smug look on his face.

Sarah - You look entirely too pleased with yourself.

Elina - What happened to all the leftover ammo.

Tirmek - :devil:

Kerrith enters covered in egg and toilet paper.

Sarah and Elina - :heehee:

Kerrith - (i.h.h. I hate Tirmek)

Tirmek - Who's the newb strangling Micheal?

Elina - That's his mother.

Tirmek - This explains so much, the brain damage is due to repeated oxygen deprivation.

Terra - I'd scold him, but thats exactly what happening.

Aerith (coming out of hug mode) - Oh so your Satnak's nephew.

Tirmek - Tirmek d'Tharmis son of Ketty d'Tharmis.

Micheal - Gasp... Ketty is Satnak's older sister... not as strong, or tough, or mean, quite a bit faster though. *Wheeze*

Aerith - I thought she was dead.

Tirmek - She got better.

Aerith - :doh: I walked into that. Anyway its nice to meet you. (extends hand in greeting)

Tirmek follows suite revealing his reversed hands.

Aerith - ... I was warned that one of you was infiltrating the ship.

Tirmek - What do you speak of?

Aerith - (eyes glow, wings unfurl) Do not pretend with me "Knightmare Prince".

Tirmek - :mymy: where did you hear that title?

Aerith - Even as the seventh was struck down his bloodline grows in strength. I have taken time to study the Rakshasa, I know of your powers son of Fear. To pass as a humanoid of good will and kind intentions, to terrify even strong hearts with a touch, to bring destruction and ruin in your wake (pulls her greatsword into the material realm), to bind the souls of others to your will. Die son of the 13th god.

Tirmek - Not today tyrant!

Tirmek plants a viscious right hook in Aerith's jaw. *saphire knightmare strike*

Aerith - Noooooo Lady!

Tirmek - *manifest incarnate warhammer* *call weapon (kama)* I am not the Knightmare Prince.

Elina - (maniests her mindblade as a longsword then uses the fox glove bringforth another) Leave him alone.

Sarah - (Tail pops out and shadows begin to thicken around her) He didn't do anything.

Terra - Stop it all of you, Aerith, snap out of it.

Lisa - Tirmek?

Tirmek - grrrr...Poke her.

Micheal - Mommy?

Terra - *poke*

Aerith - oh sweet gods what did you do to them you little monster:eek: :headexplo

Tirmek - What did I do? you glorified feather duster!

Terra - Stop it! Aerith, Tirmek is the son of Toren the God of fear. He is also one of the most trustworthy people I've ever met. He's already risked his life to save Sarah once.

Lisa - I think you got some bad intel.

Terra - Indeed for the months I've known him he has done everything he could to distance himself from his father.

Lisa - He wields incarnum, his incarnate weapon is the warhammer.

Aerith - A trick of the Call weapon power.

Terra - Show her your incarnate avatar.

Tirmek - I have two, the Thorn which is a meld only availiable to members of my family or the other one.

Lisa - The other one.

Sarah - Um that really wont help his case.

Elina - Yeah you see...

Tirmek - Regardless of the fact that I do my best to do it the tradtional way, every time I use that meld I look like a demon.

Aerith - Ah-ha

Elina - Nothing in there said he was evil.

Aerith - huh?

Elina - think a moment, those powers you listed, he already displayed them, he passes for a good person because he is, he can cause fear with a touch because he's trained in the sublime way, his incarnum power uses the power of souls, and when he fights stuff tends to get shredded.

Sarah - We still haven't found all the holes from the last fight.

Terra - This looks like a case of divinations gone bad.

Aerith - Then why do the Rakshasa constantly bring up the Knightmare Prince.

Tirmek - Under my father's rule they had more power then they have enjoyed since they were cast out of Karnath. Naturally as the planes attuned they were able to comunicate with their brethren here. They know I survived, they just haven't been able to find me. What they don't know is that I read as a humanoid, they expect he son of a god to register as half-fiend at least. Knightmare prince is their idea, if they know I'm here though...
urial angel of death

11-02-06, 07:24 AM		Kerrith: *pointing at Tirmek* Evil, evil, evil, evil!
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-02-06, 08:56 AM		Kerrith: *pointing at Tirmek* Evil, evil, evil, evil!
Mendova: *WHAM!* Okay, entirely enough of that! *boot*

Kerrith goes flying out of the door. Unfortunately for him the space outside is the big open area in which the FF's totally set-dressing, huge warp-like core sits, so he falls very far down.

Saberiel (grabbing Aerith gently): Sorry, angel, but no fighting in Erk's Place unless it's a traditional bar brawl. And if I may add, we know from experience that not all rakshasa are evil.

Tony: He's a GRRRRRRRRRREAT kid!
Kaizer_Ryu

11-02-06, 09:17 AM		Aerith: I keep feeling like I'm forgetting something...

Terra: Have you told Jarlot you're alive again?

Aerith: *suddenly overwhelmingly cheerful* Oh, yes! *looks at Saberiel* You're not jealous?

Saberiel: Maybe a little. But you are his wife and all...

Aerith: Oh, don't worry, there's plenty of me to go around ;) . Now I have to find my little shmoopsy poo! :cloud9: *runs off*

Tirmek: *anime sweat drop*

Lisa: You get used to it.

Michael: It's times like this I'm really glad Dad is immortal.

*elsewhere*

Rose stands in front of a large scrying screen dressed in a carnival Barker's outfit. A large crowd has already gathered and is paying good money to see Kithle's little show.

Rose: Come one! Come all! See the greatest (i.e. funniest) sight in Eberron! Be amazed as your former Captain is subjected to every massive heart and brain damaging experience known to humanoids simultaniously!

Doog: You are a real bastard for doing this, you know.

Kithle: That's Magnificent Bastard to you.

Devon: I can't believe Captain Rose is letting you show everyone Jarlot's tearful yet humorously overwhelming reunion with Aerith.

Kithle: *tersley* :mad: Don't you talk to me.

Devon: *emo bard single tear*

Pholly: Isn't there a rule against this?

Kithle: Only if the Captain doesn't get a cut. I promised 30% of the coinage.

Pholly: Coinage? Not profits? But...a third of this is Copper... :mymy: You ARE a Magnificent Bastard.

Kithle: :devil: And don't you forget it. :evillaugh

Kanatash: *telepathically from elsewhere* What's the catch?

Kithle: *likewise* The catch? The catch is that the feed is bad. It will start to break up just as the scene gets good. Not enough to keep them from seeing what Jarlot is going through, mind you, just enough to be frustrating. :plotting:

Kanatash: ...you need a bigger Plaque.

Pholly: This popcorn is too salty...

Devon: Splinters in the benches... :weep:

Doog: *cringing look after drinking from his soda*

Kithle: :devil: Did I forget to mention that there's no syrup in the soda dispenser?

Pholly: *swallowing desperately from thirst* Bastard.

Kithle: That's-

All: :mad: We KNOW!!!

Kithle: :D
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-02-06, 09:54 AM		Pholly: … Bastard.

Kithle: That's-

All: :mad: We KNOW!!!

Kithle: :D
13: Bunny has Satnak, Silver has Caralot, I have Kithle.
rampant

11-02-06, 10:17 AM		Izzy (looking sick and convulsing slightly) - I need to go to the ba-ha-ha-ha-throooooooom.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-02-06, 05:26 PM		Bunny: You should be aware that on this ship the bathroom may come to you.

Izzy: That doesn't sound so—

Awakened Dire Toilet: RRRRAAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGHHHH!!!!
Charles Phipps

11-02-06, 05:59 PM		Lisa: Aerith?

Aerith: Yes?

Lisa: Me and Terra are going away for a week to go shop for a summer home. Could you watch Elina and Sarah?

Aerith: Of course!

Kids::bigeyes:
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-02-06, 06:09 PM		Kids::bigeyes:
Sarah: Hey, sis, there's a note attached to your back.

Elina: Well, read it.

Note: MWAHAHAHA!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
—13

Sarah: :rolleyes: Only one of them would take the time to write out maniacle laughter.

OOC: :chicken: if you get the reference.
rampant

11-02-06, 07:51 PM		Tirmek - (in a meditative pose on a table) (i.h.h. I must find it, I cannot allow them to ruin this. Where are you? I will find you.)
-----------------------------------

Scarred Nazarune - I think not quite yet my prince.

Izzy - Who are you talking to?

S.N. - That is not your concern. If I free you you will owe me a favor.

Izzy - Just do it already!
------------------------------

OOC: You can't catch or kill the bugger.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-02-06, 09:13 PM		OOC: You can't catch or kill the bugger.
OOcat: *anime sweatdrop* Did I make it sound like that? I was just messing with him. I reality the Awakened Dire Toilet is quite a friendly, gentle creature.

The sounds of screaming come from the nearby bathroom, quickly cut off by a loud CRUNCH.

OOcat: :thinks: Then again, maybe that was the Awakened Dire Trashcan. I keep getting those two mixed up.
rampant

11-02-06, 09:15 PM		I meant the nazarune.
rampant

11-02-06, 11:21 PM		Tirmek - Sigh, If there's one out there its too slick for me.

Ketty - I heard.

Tirmek - Then you know what we have to do?

Ketty - Hunt.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-02-06, 11:22 PM		Lisa: *giggle* Aren't we looking for a summer home?

Terra: *nuzzle* We're only looking for a location. We have all week. Your needs take precedence. ;)

Lisa: :cloud9: You're incouragable...

-----

Elina: Hey! Izzy's gone!

Sarah: Impossible! Jingo tied those ropes!

Elina: Someone must have let him out...

Sarah: Most of this crew may be insane, but no one's that dumb. Not even Muradin.

Elina: I think we have a stowaway...

DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNN

Sarah: *sigh* I'll get him. I still haven't gotten the taste of Bard out of my mouth from last time... *runs off*

Elina: Better let Tirmek know. I really hope this doesn't involve what he was talking about. If they're making their move while Mom and Momma are gone on purpose...
Charles Phipps

11-03-06, 12:31 AM		Rose: Contacting Jarlot may be a bit difficult.

Aerith: How so?

Rose: Well your eternal cheeriness was sort of a balance on his evil side.

Aerith: Oh?

Rose: Yes, it sort of escaped and he's spent the last three years building up an army to conquer all of Khovaire.

Aerith: Well he can't be THAT different.

Rose: He shaved his head and changed his name to Kane as a start.

Aerith: Okay....

Rose: Well, here's a video of what he's been up to...

*Rose slides in a VHS cassette to Ketler's player*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=60zyMBqAvRQ

Aerith: :blink:

Rose: So yes, you may need to talk to him soon.

Aerith: Where does JARLOT of all people build an army of fanatical followers?

Rose: Well, we killed off most of the evil overlords on the planet so there was an open market for the Son of Khyber to take over the planet.

Aerith: Oh no! Is he SOBER?

Rose: I'm sorry Aerith but without you there wasn't a reason for him to drink...

Aerith: Oiye.
Charles Phipps

11-03-06, 12:45 AM		In an Evil Lair on Evil Island

Jarlot: We have waited centuries for this moment. The rivers will flow with the blood of those who oppose us.

*Ketler wears an snazzy Starship Troopers uniform*

Ketler: You only started this group three years ago!

Jarlot: I've seen the future. Our Dragonshard future. And as you see this battle just beginning to unfold I've already seen the final act. It is my destiny to lead the way for all mankind

Ketler: So exactly what is your plan again for conquering Khovaire?

Jarlot: You would not be able to comprehend its genius.

Ketler: Try me.

Jarlot: Fine. Basically, Dragonshards are the heart of the entire Khovaire economy.

Ketler: I thought that was gold.

Jarlot: DO NOT CONTRADICT ME!

Ketler: Okayyyy.

Jarlot: Therefore, I am going to establish a base around a large patch of dragonshards. Then I will send out little harvesters and refineries to gather up the Dragonshards, which I will use then to build troopers and weapons.

Ketler: Right there on the site?

Jarlot: Yes.

Ketler: In the middle of nowhere you'll build factories to construct all your ships and somehow have all the infrastructure you need plus be able to recruit troopers as well?

Jarlot: That's the miracle of Dragonshards yes.

Ketler: Uh huh.

Jarlot: Then, I will fortify my position against attack by the Alliance of the Four Nations.

Ketler: When they deploy troops to attack? Won't they do that before your base is set up?

Jarlot: No no, they won't deploy immediately. They'll build their OWN base right beside mine to harvest their OWN Dragonshards. Then they'll attack me only with the forces they themselves built there.

Ketler: Uh huh.

Jarlot: Eventually, the dragonshards will be tapped out or I will launch an all out offensive that annihilates their base and then we'll move onto another area.

Ketler: With the troopers you constructed?

Jarlot: Don't be stupid! We build another base and start from scratch! They'll do the same!

Ketler: Yeah, I'm not getting this.

Jarlot: That's because you don't understand strategy or tactics.

Ketler: How exactly do you intend to defeat the troopers when you attack them anyway?

Jarlot: Well pretty much just overwhelm them with sheer numbers.

Ketler: Okay ROMMEL....that's a brilliant plan alright.

Jarlot: Glad you agree. If it goes on long enough I can construct special units or build things like nukes to attack.

Ketler: This sounds suspiciously similiar to our undocumented Spelljammer campaign.

***

A year ago

Jarlot: And that's how we'll defeat the Zerg and the Protoss.

*Jarlot is in Captain Kirk's uniform and Ketler is wearing a Scottish beret and Kilt*

Ketler: Aiye Captain!
Charles Phipps

11-03-06, 01:03 AM		Elina: Ummm...Aunt Aerith?

*A rainbow appears above Aerith as she's sewing*

Aerith: Yes, Little One?

*gives Elina a dog biscuit shaped cookie then takes her into her lap to begin tail combing*

Elina: I'm alittle curious about the rest of the universe and thought you could answer things.

Aerith: Being an omnipotently powered Solar Deva?

Elina: Yeah....also married to the Child of Khyber. Why isn't Michael a crazy hybrid like us?

Aerith: Well that's because we bound his powers up.

Elina: What? Like us?

Aerith: Mmm hmm. Jarlot unfortunately had some of his powers released before he was ready and has had to struggle with his evil nature ever since. Sadly, it overwhelmed Michael for a time until Lisa brought it out. It's also why Michael vascillates between hyper good and hyper evil with most of his time being a slovenly neutral.

Elina: What's going to happen to us?

Aerith: Your mothers have been very careful so you shouldn't lose control like they will. However, gradually you'll find your outsider powers manifesting inside you and attempting to dictate you assume a template for which your final form may be chosen.

Elina: Final form?

Aerith: All demons start as larvae or similiarly natal demons while Angels start as small sprite like pixies. You're unique in that you have started as lycanthropes. However, ultimately you'll start developing qualities of the type of being that most matches your personality.

Elina: What am I manifesting as?

Aerith: You're seemingly manifesting as a succubus.

Elina: :blink: What!?

Aerith: Well it explains a few things about you and your cousin's precoious nature.

Elina: Uh huh....what about Sarah?

Aerith: Love Angel. Next question?

Elina: What's with the Final Fantasy stuff all around?

*Aerith starts singing with Rose*

Aerith and Rose: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oI27WJ7ZG7Q
rampant

11-03-06, 01:10 AM		Elina: Better let Tirmek know. I really hope this doesn't involve what he was talking about. If they're making their move while Mom and Momma are gone on purpose...

S.N. - No frigging duh kid, that Terra chick is one scary lady.

13 - What about Lisa?:D

S.N. - I need new pants:weep:
--------------------------------------

Izzy - I feel alot better, ... and about 10 pounds lighter.

Awakened dire toilet - please let me die!!!
Kaizer_Ryu

11-03-06, 02:02 AM		OOC: What's really scary is I can name every single one of those characters without a second thought. And I loved the Starcraft ripoff. Even with an army of fanatical followers and being sober...Jarlot is still Jarlot.

Aerith and Rose: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oI27WJ7ZG7Q
OOKaizer: Sweet! I didn't know you two knew my theme song!

Rose: Loser.

OOKaizer: :D

Rose: Not the reaction I was expecting...

OOKaizer: *begins drooling over Aerith again*

*KATHWACK*

OOKaizer: *on the ground* Ow.

Elina: *holding her hammer* How many times do we have to tell you to stop that?!

OOKaizer: More times than you possibly could.

*more beating*

-----

Lisa is currently sporting wolf ears, a tail, and whiskers. She looks very surprised as she stares at her reflection in the water.

Lisa: Wow! How'd you do that?

Terra: ;) Trade secret. But those are most definitely real.

Lisa: How'd you get past my immunity to supernatural diseases?

Terra: That one...you might just be able to coax out of me. :smirk:

Lisa: :devil: Woof.

*an hour later*

Lisa: Ready to spill yet?

Terra: *huff* *pant* No. ;) *gasp*

Lisa: Good.

*several hours later still*

Lisa: How about now?

Terra: *VERY groggily* Ok...you...wi...n... :zzz: :cloud9:

Lisa just sighs as she nuzzles up under Terra's chin for a quiet nap under the stars.

*later still*

Terra: I didn't have to get past any immunities.

Lisa: *now normal* What do you mea-:cloud9:-AN?!

Terra: The Lycanthropy you carry can act as a catalyst for shapechanging to a far lesser degree than Shifters if utilized right.

Lisa: This would be easier to-:cloud9:-follow if you'd sto-:D-OP a second!

Terra: What's the fun in that, love? :devil: I used the dormant potential of the disease to change your form.

Lisa: *huff* Then why-:bounce:-Y'D I change back?

Terra: In short, it went back to sleep. We can do it again if you like. :devil:

Lisa: *pant* Much as I'd love to, *pant* we still have a lot of ground to cover.

Terra: *sigh* Ok...

Lisa: I didn't say no to later, did I? :smirk:

Terra: Dear gods I love you. *glomph*

S.N. - No frigging duh kid, that Terra chick is one scary lady.

13 - What about Lisa?

S.N. - I need new pantsDamn right. :D
Charles Phipps

11-03-06, 02:31 AM		Hey hey! Take it to the slash fiction section of the website!

Kaizer: There isn't one...yet.

Hehehe.

And as usual, your parts in the story are as funny as anything else posted here ;-)
Charles Phipps

11-03-06, 03:03 AM		Elina: I'm afraid.

Sarah: Why?

Elina: Well uhh...how do I put this delicately?

Aerith: HELLO GIRLS! I've found your pet and decided to cast a spell on him!

*Hands Sarah a Moogle*

Sarah: GAH!

Aerith: I've also determined that you're too young to adventure so I've cast a spell to limit your powers to what costumes you wear!

Sarah: You got that from FF-X2!

*Sarah and Elina both become black mages*

Sarah: Oh for Pete's sake.

Aerith: Oh, and to also make sure you're healthy. I've gotten some Jenova DNA to innoculate you two with thanks to Auntie Caralot.

Elina: Oh hell...RUN!

Sarah: *Zoom*

Aerith: It's good for you!

*chases after the pair*
Kaizer_Ryu

11-03-06, 03:28 AM		Aerith: Oh, and to also make sure you're healthy. I've gotten some Jenova DNA to innoculate you two with thanks to Auntie Caralot.

Elina: Oh hell...RUN!

Sarah: *Zoom*

Aerith: It's good for you!

*chases after the pair*
Does this mean the might become Jenova's Witnesses (http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=200)? :D The glowy eyes wouldn't be noticable, since they already do that. Now, if they started to develop spikey hair, angsty indifference, wear solid purple clothing, and carry two-handed vorpal greatswords that are at least twice as big as they are around...that might tip too many people off. ;)
Charles Phipps

11-03-06, 04:32 AM		Hojo: HHIIIII KIDDSSSSSS! IT'S DOCTOR DAJOGI HOJO HERE!

*Doctor swings in with a 9 year old Jaela clone*

Elina: Oh hell no! It's Merrix D'Cannith!

Sarah: Dressed like one of the Beta villains from Final Fantasy!

Hojo: Support Shin-ra! I mean uhhh....House Cannith.

*Snuggles Jaela clone as she struggles to escape*

Elina: This explains much about Ketler. Shall we pulverize him?

Sarah: LIMITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT BREAKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-03-06, 08:19 AM		OOcat: :eek: Gah, I don't know where to begin! It's all so funny, how can I make it any better by commenting!?

Bunny: "You can't kill the Messiah'? :P #1 on the list of famous last words.

Silver: :thinks: Then that would make what's-his-name-kitten the son of the Messiah.
(WARNING, SPOILER)


13: Time to find a wacky artist/inventor.


(END OF SPOILER)

Silver: And someone needs to give him a name. :ahem:

OOcat: And how am I supposed to know what name to give the son of a character who makes references to pop-culture that have passed me by in my dimension of absolute nothingness?

Silver: Oh, wait, you're off the hook, I have to get back to TerraandLisa.

Bunny: So they're that closely link at this moment.

Silver: They will be when I'm done with them. :devil:
rampant

11-03-06, 10:55 AM		Izzy - Hello girls.

Elina - Aww Nuts.

Sarah - Not this again.

Izzy - (i.h.h. i know I can't beat them, just gotta distract them for as long as possible)
------------------------------------

Ketty - There are signals all over the ship.

---------------------------------------

Satnak - Mmmmmm :cloud9:

Serene - I thought you'd like that.:D
----------------------------------------

Tirmek - This one is very good, I've already been isolated, through a combo of ploys and good timing. I'm gonna need the big guns.
Lord Kale Fangblade

11-03-06, 01:21 PM		The Sun is eclipsed by a black moon, as the world around the ship begins to shake. Thunderclouds form around a void that begins to open in the sky. from the void Five bolts of lightning strike down, setting black flames coursing across the form of a symbol. A Pentagram with Three Black Moons above a Obsidian pyramid. More black runes form around the pyramid as crackling flames lance into the void
( If your wondering why Dramadar Hasnt broken my hands yet its because currently im locked in my impenitrable bunker.)
And from the Void Decends Naz'roth, a Black Sapphire staff in his right hand. His Black Feathered Wings slow his decent to the ground as he lands. and once again the sun shines.

Tara fades into existance.

Tara:Naz'roth, Can you not enter in a less dramatic fashion?

Naz'roth: *sigh* i'll try. give me a moment
* Fades from existance*

Theres a thunder clap and Naz'roth appears his cloak billowing out behind him.

Naz'roth: How about that?

Tara: hmmm.... its still a bit dramatic but its better. we'll stick with that now.

Naz'roth: well then. now thats sorted lets see whats going on shall we?
***

Feal-Thas Stalks the Darkness, his armour not making a noise. His movements mirror that of a predator. Somthing new was in the darkness. and he was on the hunt...
rampant

11-03-06, 02:15 PM		Feal'theas turns to examine a corridor from which a sudden bang had issued forth, only to find a dagger lodged in a chink in his armor.

Feal'thas - (pulls and examines dagger) Augh poisoned with Dragon bane... and Hachoo something else, then theres the magical resonance...crud ( as the dagger winks out )

-----------------------------------

S.N. - (biting it's lower lip and dribbling blood onto the dagger) Hehe. One more distraction.

Bring the dagger around in an intricate pattern a copy of Feal'thas is made manifest. The creature slips into the shadows, already on the prowl.

S.N. - (i.h.h. The copy will act as the Dragon but on my side, also it will register my signature leaving a nasty surprise if the mother Tharmis tracks it down as another one of the jammer nodes.) Now for the Young Prince.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-03-06, 03:44 PM		Silver: :mymy:

13: What now?

Silver: Do you realize that it's very likely if Tirmek and Sarah get together—

OOKaizer: NINE!

Silver: —that you'd be related to Kanatash?

13: Well, since I don't exist any more this is all hypothetical, but let's take a look.

Silver: Well, you're a child of Khyber, and so is Jarlot. Now Jarlot just had a kitten with Marish, who also had a kitten with Terrek. Terrek is Serene's father, and she's now the sire of Satnak's kid. Satnak is the sister of Ketty, who's Tirmek's mother.

13: So far so good.

Silver: Now in the hy-po-the-ti-cal event that Tirmek and Sarah get together, that gives Tirmek a relationship to Lisa. Lisa is the half-sister of Weylin by Krozen. Now that Sakura Jaela's run off there is no reason Weylin won't go back to Caralot's dimension to be with Jaela Vidalis. That would make Weylin related to Caralot, who is now having a baby with Kanatash.

13: Wow. Do you know what this means?

Silver: I sure do: if I can get Sithis interested in Elina—

OOKaizer: NI—oh, why bother?

Silver: —and then find a way to mix in Kithle, I'd have the whole über set!
Crystalforged

11-03-06, 08:18 PM		Silver: —and then find a way to mix in Kithle, I'd have the whole über set!
OOC: Inbreeding for the win! Before we'll all be one big happy* family.

*by happy I mean muderous, psychotic bastards.



IC: With the contractions having started, Kanatash is in the ship's maternity ward (yes it has one, they would have had to build one with all the kids these people are having). A fair number of the crew has gathered outside, mostly out of morbid curiosity. After a long while the grunts and groans finally stop from behind the curtained bed giving way to panting. Silver draws the curtain back and the crew crowd forward to see the child. Kanatash cradles a small pink bundle.

Kanatash: Its a girl, isn't she precious? (pulls back the blanket to reveal the child)

Click the baby! (http://www.funshop.ch/catalog/images/artikel/36204.jpg)

Kelter: Hey, wait a second isn't that-

Kanatash: KELTER! Do you enjoy being mind reamed?

Kelter: Ulp.
cypher_zero

11-03-06, 08:25 PM		OOC: Dammit Crystalforged! My brain is bleeding again!! Owww.....
.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

11-03-06, 08:35 PM		OOC: Dammit Crystalforged! My brain is bleeding again!! Owww.....
.

OOC: here, take my spare... Wuss.
Crystalforged

11-03-06, 08:40 PM		OOC: Dammit Crystalforged! My brain is bleeding again!! Owww.....
.
Your pain amuses me.

You know, sometimes I worry about what is says about me that I draw so much pleasure from destroying the sanity of others.

The voices tell me not to worry about it though and as I always say, when all else fails, trust the voices.
Paulon

11-03-06, 08:40 PM		I may not participate ICly in this thread, but I do enjoy it. And I have to offer congratulations to Crystalforged for that 'baby' picture. I'm just glad I wasn't eating or drinking at the time I looked at it. *bows*
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-03-06, 08:50 PM		OOC: He told me he was going to do that! He didn't actually tell me what he was going to use it for, but I suggested it as an ingagement gift to Caralot, and he said he was going to use it sometime.

By the way, how exactly does any of this cause pain? Seriously, I don't think I can take this as a joke anymore, I'm really truely curious.
Crystalforged

11-03-06, 08:57 PM		I was curious if you would remember that little exchange. Yes I have you to thank for the inspiration here. It just seemed so perfect after all, Caralot has a cute fetish and Kanatash, well he's just crazy. It like its the ultimate culmination of both their work.

EDIT: Oh, by the way, do you have a reaction from Caralot for the family's new addition?
cypher_zero

11-03-06, 09:09 PM		By the way, how exactly does any of this cause pain? Seriously, I don't think I can take this as a joke anymore, I'm really truely curious.
It hurts because I'm still slightly SANE! It doesn't bother the rest of you 'cause you're all nuts! AND I have to deal with Crystalforged on a weekly basis, as he's one of my players! It was just too much crazy! My brain can only take so much! I need to lie down...
.
Crystalforged

11-03-06, 09:13 PM		Do not fear, the pain will not last long. While the process is somewhat... disconcerting... once it is completed your conversion will be complete. You will think like us, see like us, BE like us. We are the Borg, you will be assimilated.
rampant

11-03-06, 09:29 PM		OORampant - (clutching superscope) :evillaugh:

OOCyrstalforged - Some of you better than others.:embarrass :rolleyes:
Kaizer_Ryu

11-03-06, 09:42 PM		OOC: LOL to Hello Kitty! Now I'm off to start Rei's new campaign, since urial ran out of ideas for his. I find it endlessly amusing that Terra has advanced immesurably farther in this thread than in the game she originated in. After this...I get to start my game. :plotting: But with how fast we go, it won't be till 2040. :rolleyes:
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-03-06, 09:54 PM		EDIT: Oh, by the way, do you have a reaction from Caralot for the family's new addition?
Silver: What part of "Way too lazy to come up with a simple name for a kid" fails to instill you with a sense of unreliability?

OOcat: I'll get to them. It's the perfect way to show that Weylin and Jaela V are dating. Also maybe I can actually do something funny with Johnny.

13: Translation: it's going to be boring. :bored:
Crystalforged

11-03-06, 10:09 PM		For a name I was thinking of just calling her Kitten unless you've got something better. I'll probably write more this weekend.

EDIT: Doh, I was thinking you were talking about Kanatash and Caralot's kid, now that Charles has posted I realize you were probably talking about Jarlot's kid. Damn there's a lot of rugrats running around suddenly.
Charles Phipps

11-03-06, 10:10 PM		Jarlot: I name you...Shroedigger!

Shroedigger: Yes Mein Furher!
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-03-06, 10:21 PM		Damn there's a lot of rugrats running around suddenly.
Silver: Not nearly enough, in my opinion. :D

OOEveryone: Is there anyway to stop her?

OOcat: No, no there is not. :bored:
Jarlot: I name you...Shroedigger!
OOC: Brilliant! Wish I'd come up with it.

OOcat: Lazy.

OOC: I hate you.
rampant

11-04-06, 01:21 AM		Feal'thas - Huh?

Feal'thas - Huh?

Feal'thas raises one hand, Feal'thas mimics it as if a mirror.
--------------------------------------------------------------------

OOC: Slow night, do what you want, but no catching or Killing the scarred Nazarune.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-04-06, 02:20 AM		Silver: Not nearly enough, in my opinion. :D
OOKaizer: :plotting: :eek: :banghead: No! Too soon! Far too soon...

-----

Elina: *whispers* Why did we agree to this?

Sarah: *whispers* Shhh! Would you rather she pick up the needle again?

Elina: Right. Nevermind.

An old-timey video begins playing, showing Jarlot seated at a desk.

Narrator: Oh, why, hello there Jarlot. *Jarlot waves* What do you have planned for today? *points out the window* Saving the World you say? *nods but looks upset* But what's that Jarlot? You need to cross the Overworld map, hmmm?

The scene shifts to a field complete with cardboard trees and clouds suspended by strings.

Narrator: Not a problem. But there's one thing you must keep in mind! Beware the Random Battles! *looks worried* Clueless, eh? Well listen to me, and you'll be just fine! *feels relieved* First step, check your equipment. Oversized sword? *pulls out a HUGE GREATSWORD from NOWHERE* Check! Armor? Check! Mmmmm...50% lightning damage. Nice one! *smiles* Party Members? *shifts to two familiar looking women* Ah, Aerith and Tifa! Nice choice, Jarlot. They're hot! *back to Jarlot, who nods while grinning* Now lets enter a Random Battle. Don't worry about finding one. Take a few steps. You're bound to run into one.

Jarlot takes one step, and the screen goes swirly. Battle music begins to play. A bar down at the bottom of the screen displays Jarlot's, Tifa's, and Aerith's HP, MP, and Time Gauge as two wolves appear opposite the party.

Narrator: This is your battle screen, Jarlot. *nods* Notice the baddies on the other side? You want those to die! *grins*

A small menu pops up over the larger one at the bottom as Tifa's Time Gauge fills up first. It reads Attack, Magic, Summon, and Item.

Narrator: Looks like Tifa is up first. Show 'em some magic, Tifa! Use the Magic menu and select your spell.

The cursor goes to Magic and selects Fire. The wolf is taken down in one shot.

Narrator: Excellent, Tifa. You can light my fires anyday! Mmyes...

Another small menu pops up, this time it's Jarlot's.

Narrator: Your turn, Jarlot.

The menu opens to reveal the spells Sleepel, Confuse, Slow, and Beserk.

Narrator: Wait, what's this?! You only have Status Inducing magic spells! Why, those suck! *looks angry* But you're more the type to rely on Brute Strength, aren't you, Jarlot? *nods and grins* Go get 'em, tiger!

The cursor selects Attack, and Jarlot cuts the remaining wolf in two. Victory music plays.

Narrator: Good job, guys! Now collect the spoils. *another menu appears* Yes, I know. I have no idea why these random animals are carrying 148 Gil and a magic Fire Ring. It will forever be a mystery!

The screen returns to the field.

Narrator: What a battle! Now that we have a break, let's change our party!

The screen shifts again to show Barret, Cid, Red XIII, and Vincent.

Narrator: Hmmm, let's see, who to choose... *screen shifts further* Ah hah! How about Yuffie and Cait Sith? *happy jumping* Just kidding guys. No one likes you! *crushed hopes*

Sarah: :mad: Hey!

Elina: Shhh...

Screen returns to Jarlot, Tifa, and Aerith.

Narrator: Yes, let's stick with the ladies. Let's enter another Random Battle! *takes a step, nothing happens* Try again.

This step works. The screen goes swirly again, revealing the same setup as the last time. The enemy this time is an Iron Giant.

Narrator: Uh-oh, Jarlot! This one looks tough. *serious look* You might need backup on this one. *nods* Say there, Aerith, how about you summon up something fierce!

The cursor selects Bahamut, who magically swoops down and blasts the Giant for 50 HP.

Narrator: Hmmm. Not powerful enough for this badguy. It would be best to Flee from this battle. Press the two Shoulder Buttons and run away like a little girl!

Elina: :mad: That's just-

Sarah: Shhh!

The group runs, and the screen retuns once again to the field. Jarlot look quite disappointed.

Narrator: Don't be embarrased, Jarlot. It's ok to run sometimes! *shrugs* Say, Tifa. You look wounded! *there is a scratch on her cheek* How 'bout if Aerith heals your wounds...? *cure spell* Oh, sorry Aerith. Naughty thoughts! *:embarrass* Mmyeeeheh... But let's try one more time at a Random Battle.

This time, Jarlot merely lifts his arm and the screen goes swirly for the third time. A strange, foot-tall green creature in a brown robe holding a lamp and a knife appears.

Narrator: Oh my! It's a Tonberry, Jarlot! Better use that Flee command again! *raises his sword* What's that Jarlot? You think you can take him? Well, if you insist. Nice knowing you!

Despite the groups best efforts, the Tonberry reaches them. The screen quickly pans over to a Moogle and Chocobo as the party is beaten to a pulp.

Narrator: Ooh! :eek: Ahh! Oh, that's gotta hurt! :gah: Oh, it's not supposed to bend like that! Ooh! :shocked: Ouch! Oh, I hurt just thinking about it!

The screen fades to black and returns to show the party on the ground.

Narrator: Looks like you went in way over your head. Lesson learned, eh Jarlot? *sits up and nods* Ah, it looks like you're still alive! This would be a good time to learn about reviving fallen Party Members. Go to the item menu, wade through all the useless items (Carob nut=Aphrodisiac for Chocobos, Supersweeper = WTF?!) and find your Phoenix Downs! There you go, Jarlot. Now use them on your K.O.ed Party. *does so* There you go, good as new! Remember, Jarlot. Phoenix Downs are your friends! *nods* But keep in mind that they don't always work.

I'm looking at yoooouu, Aerith! *looks worried*

Aerith shuts off the video.

Aerith: Any questions?

Sarah: That was the biggest load of-mmmph!

Elina: *covering Sarah's mouth* No, no! We're good! *drags her away*

OOC: *sigh* It was funnier in my head. Oh, well. Maybe the next one will go better.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-04-06, 07:14 AM		Bunny: Was that stat-altering spells or status-inducing spells? Because the latter are—

Tony: —GRRRRRRRRRRRRRREAT!—

Bunny: —for disabling the enemy prior to giving them an unresisted smackdown. Stat-boosting spells never do anything. It's always best to just hit hard and kill as fast as possible.

Word Being: Puzzles are the Way. All violence is merely a cheap attempt to extend the length of the game.
Chrys

11-04-06, 09:37 AM		Bloom Sorry people some body is to busy to write any thing... I can't belive he wants he to do this... And now it time for Bloom's Fist impression of FF12.

1: Balthier is the Bomb! :D and should be made capatin
2: Vaan is a whinny and to pretty for his own good.
3. the battle system is ok but does not lend its self to gaining money
4. I like the lincenes system.
5. Fran for a digital bunny girl is hot then all the other female party members :embarrass
6: I like it how all the evil empires airships are named after espers :cool:


Over all I'd say its better then 8, 10, 5, 1, 2, 3... do I have to say the next bit... Fine and It is better then Both 6 and 7.

Only9and4areaboveitnowIhavetoRunfromthea ngrymob!
Kaizer_Ryu

11-04-06, 12:33 PM		OOKaizer: Just so you know, I usually agree with you.

Bunny: But...?

OOKaizer: In FFVII, status inducing magic really does suck. It rarely works, it does very little half the time, and by the time you get it to work, the enemies could have been dead five times over with generic hack and slash.

Bunny: And you like this game...why?

OOKaizer: Cloud kicks ass, Aerith is my favorite RPG character EVER, and the story ROCKS! :D Plus the Summons are great at killing things in spectacular fashion.

Bunny: Knights of the Round... :drool:
rampant

11-04-06, 12:38 PM		Tirmek - I really hate this meld, why can't I make it look...not demonic, all the other melds work properly why does my incarnate avatar look like a winged Rakshasa.
-----------------------------------------------------

S.N. - (i.h.h. He's in this room I can feel him...Smart he's forced me to enter a room with one door meaning I'd have to come through the door making sure he'd detect me. Too bad I can go right throught the wall.) *wraith form*

S.N. becomes ghostly and incorporeal, slipping through the wall while activating an invisibility spell, S.N. discovers a blank grey room.

The magic hiding S.N. gives out

S.N. - Hey :confused:

Tirmek - This room negates arcane and divine magic.

Door swings shut and locks.

Tirmek - It also shows a remarkable responsiveness to Psionics.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-04-06, 02:21 PM		Sarah: *cracks her knuckles* What are you up to?

Izzy: You sure you want to know?

Elina: *dual mindblade: Spiked chain and kunai* Even if we have to beat it out of you. No, scratch that. Especially if we have to beat it out of you.

Izzy: :devil: Let's see if you can back up that threat. *dual void shuriken*

The weapons sail past the girls as they dodge, only to strike the support beams on the wall behind them. The ensuing collapse creates a cloud of dust.

Elina: *cough* Son of a-!

Sarah: *cough* Hey! He's getting away!

Izzy: *disappearing down the hall* MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
urial angel of death

11-04-06, 03:45 PM		P/Y/R: I demand supcakes!

Volrath: Yes dear. :(
-----------

Kerrith is searching through the library, for one of the books Nalfien order him to retieve.

Kerrith: How one earth do I work this filing system!

OOC: Will be designing the children shortly, and yes Kaizer one of them will.
Lord Kale Fangblade

11-04-06, 04:07 PM		Sithis Fist smashes into Izzys face with a dull cracking noise. Izzy is knocked to the floor several feet away, blood streaming from his nose.

Sithis steps forwards in his battle armour, his Valenar Double bladed Scimitar drawn he takes on a defensive stance.

Sithis: *flashing a vampiric smile* My turn.

***
Feal-Thas Draws his Sword, and takes on a Defensive stance.
his eyes lock with his mirror counterpart. whom also takes on a defensive stance.

Feal-Thas: I've always wanted to fight myself. this should prove rather entertaining.

Feal-Thas (mirror): your shattered corpse will be the first of many that shall have fallen by my blade.

Feal-Thas dives forward in a lunge, his shield protecting his chest. his counterpart brings his own blade into a perfect counter before dancing back. the two circle each other once again. the Mirror version feins to the left and strikes to the right. Feal-Thas parries and counterattacks with a shield bash. His mirror staggers back slightly and Feal-Thas presses forwards, the Mirror version lunges. Feal-Thas parries. Feal-Thas brings his blade up in an uppercut only to be parried by his mirrors shield.

Feal-Thas: (I.H.H) he has not need to get in my head. he knows my every move and attack, he knows how to counter all my spells so they're to no avail. i need to do think different. perhaps if i change tactics?

Feal-Thas goes into the defensive, his mirror attacks, Feal-Thas parries with as little effort as possible.
The Mirror version smiles, and begins to use more energy in his attacks, bringing his sword crashing down on his opponents defenses. one particularly violent blow causes Feal-thas's shield to shatter. Feal-Thas staggers back as his mirror disarms him in one fluid motion.

Feal-Thas( Mirror): Tut tut. i'd expected a better fight from you, but it seems i am vastly stronger and supiroir than you. perhaps my masters magic is stronger than even you? maybe even Naz'roths and Taras? nevermind. i shall take great pleasure in killing each of your siblings one by one, and then. but i'll take extra long in killing you, you perfetic waste of flesh!

Feal-Thas: What did you call me?

Feal-Thas: you are weak. you are a waste of flesh. you do not desrve to even exist. killing you would be a mercy.

Feal-Thas felt that old white hot anger welling up within him, the anger that burned within the veins of all of the BrokenBlade line. perhaps it served some use......
Feal-Thas felt the anger became more than flames. it became a veritable inferno of eldritch energy. he tapped into the hunger, that he'd held so long....
Feal-Thas's eyes became pure white as he fell to the hunger. as it claimed him as its own. the hunger that lurked beneath all vampires skin.

Feal-Thas locked his eyes with his mirror image, and watched as his oppenents blade tore through the air towards his neck. he ducked and tackled His mirror to the ground. Feal-Thas brought his fist into his mirrors face again and again. until the struggling eventualy stopped and the spell faded away.
Feal-Thas stared at his bloody hands as the hunger and anger left him. the blood stains faded away.
he shuddered. he could still hear the hunger clammering for more. he ignored it. and headed towards the top decks.
there would be plenty of battle soon enough.

OOC: also, yes urial you may take part in my way back when series.
Chrys

11-04-06, 04:39 PM		Bloom stops running for a bit

Bloom: I am suposed to say that Green magic, what they are now calling status magic works most of the time... unless you fighting a boss then you don't miss they are immune [:mad:]. Oh and the new Cid is a mad [evil??] techno-mage... I'm talking Kelter mad. Quicknenings [limt breaks] are fun [and can kill bosses in one hit!] but they drain you mana.

Mob of FF7 fans: There she is!

ooc: this is mildly based on a true story I said that I like 10-2 better then 7 and I was out of the mall.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-04-06, 05:00 PM		OOC: Will be designing the children shortly, and yes Kaizer one of them will.
OOC: :plotting: :devil: :evillaugh :schemes: :plotting:

IC:

Izzy regenerates as Elina meets up with Sithis.

Elina: Enough with this. Start talking you little punk.

Izzy: Big words from someone so small. :P

Sithis: We cannot kill you, and you cannot win against three of us.

Sarah: *from behind* It's a stalemate. Give it up.

Izzy: You forget. I can afford to wait. :devil:

He forms a void hammer and smashes his way through the floor. Sithis is the first in pursuit, followed closely by Elina. Sarah makes her own hole, smashing through the floor and just barely missing Izzy as he flees. She turns to follow him as the others catch up.

Sarah: So clo-CRAP!

She narrowly avoids a hail of void shurikens as she hits the floor. Elina is slightly less lucky, blocking one with her kunai mindblade, and "catching" another with her shoulder. Sithis manages to parry most, taking one in the gut. As they remove the offending weapons, they dissipate. The group begins pursuit once again.

Sithis: Coward. He refuses to stand and fight!

Elina: *heal* He's not trying to fight us. He's leading us on a wild goose chase.

Sarah: Whoever let him out knows that we can't just let him roam free. So even though we're on to him, we can't really do anything about it.

Sithis: I see. He's too dangerous to fight alone. Do you have any indication of the primary objective?

Elina: Not for certain, but we have reason to believe the one who let him out is after Tirmek.

The trail runs cold at a cross way. The group stop as Sarah attempt to pick up the trail.

Sithis: Most of the Ubers are occupied at the moment. This is bad timing.

Elina: :rolleyes: Tell us about it. *to Sarah* Where'd he go?

Sarah: *sniff* Give me a moment... *sniff* This way!

They take off down another hall until Sarh stops cold.

Sarah: He was here, then...nothing...

Turning, she follows the scent back to a doorway. Nodding to Sithis and Elina, she smashes down the door as the other two rush in. The see Izzy standing there with a void sword looking rather pleased with himself.

Izzy: I was afraid I'd lost you. :devil:

Elina: You have nowhere to run.

Izzy: Says you.

She steps forward, but is quickly stopped by Sithis.

Sithis: It's a trap, he's sliced up the floor between us.

While the floor at first glance appears solid, light can barely be seen through a multitude of fine cuts in the boards.

Izzy: Not bad, Vampy. I was looking forward to the looks on your faces. But I guess I'll be taking another way out.

He raises his sword and cuts a hole in the ceiling. Hopping up to it, he begins pulling himself through. However, Sarah leaps over the broken floor and grabs on to his legs.

Sarah: You are not getting away again!

Izzy: Get off me you crazy wolf!

As they swing back and forth, Izzy loses his grip. Both fall, striking the broken floor and smashing through. As the dust settles, Sithis and Elina hop down to the floor below.

OOC: I'll let someone else pick up on this.

And Chrys, I have now lost all respect for you. X-2 is a piece of crap. :P I have finished EVERY Final Fantasy EXCEPT that one. I will NEVER play "Side Quest: The Game" ever again. It was worse than X, and that is saying something.

And Rei just told me that a part of him died when he read your comment. Murderer. ;)
Charles Phipps

11-04-06, 05:01 PM		OOC:

Btw, I really liked the "Final Fantasy video" of Aerith. I assumed that was actually Aerith instructing the kids on adventuring

;-)
Kaizer_Ryu

11-04-06, 05:15 PM		OOC:

Btw, I really liked the "Final Fantasy video" of Aerith. I assumed that was actually Aerith instructing the kids on adventuring

;-)
:banghead: That would have been far more humorous. Oh well. I'm just waiting till certain arcs wrap up before I do the next bit. Gives me a chance to tidy it up. This will be fun. :evillaugh :devil: :evillaugh
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-04-06, 06:58 PM		OOC: I'll let someone else pick up on this.
OOC: If you say so. :devil:
IC:
While both he and Sarah are recovering from the fall, Izzy take the opportunity to try and hit her with a void club. Suddenly out of the shadows a glowing hammer comes down and shatters the void club. Izzy tries to turn to see his assailents, but is caught around the waist by by an ectoplasmic whip and spun around to crash through another wall.

Having gotten into a defensive stance, Sarah takes in the new players. They are four squirrels the size of elven youths, with knee- and elbow-guards and smoked spectacles. Each has a different psychic weapon: hammer, whip, blade-disk, and knives. As soon as they know Sarah sees them they scram.

OOC: More to come, but you know what this is about. :D
rampant

11-04-06, 07:59 PM		S.N. - So your the legendary Knightmare Prince, scion of the god of fear.

Tirmek - I make no such claims to the title of "prince".

S.N. - So you are the son of Toren.

Tirmek - ... yes

S.N. - Then we must leave quickly.

Tirmek - Why would I go anywhere with you. Consider yourself lucky I'm merciful enough to not call my mother here.

S.N. - Toren's mate survives:eek:

Tirmek - How else would I have been spared?

S.N. - Regardless, I still found you, we can return to the Rakshasa and ...

Tirmek - I am not my father's son.

S.N. - Huh?:confused:

Tirmek - I have no interest in being the puppet ruler for some arrogant mage. I have no interest in leading an empire bent on domination and suppresion, I have no need of the Rakshasa.

S.N. - The Rakshasa need you, a symbol of our power and cunning.

Tirmek - What do I care?

S.N. - Power, wealth, minions.

Tirmek - I study at the most advanced school in our relm. I am d'Tharmis, money is no object.

S.N. - That leaves minions.:plotting:

Tirmek - I am d'Tharmis.

S.N. - A mortal name.

Tirmek - I am Mortal.

S.N. - Only half.

Tirmek - Only Half-Rakshasa then as well.

S.N. - The son of a god.

Tirmek - The son of a warrior.

S.N. - You only one who can lead our people back to greatness.

Tirmek - Greatness of a race is propaganda.

S.N. - What do you want then?

Tirmek - I lack for nothing.

S.N. - Even you don't believe that.

Tirmek - I want you to go away.

S.N. - Honest, but not the true desire.

Tirmek - Better question what do you want? even if you garner some small prestige for finding me and briging me back, unless you have some more long term plan it won't amount to much. Especially if I decide to take a disliking to you. Now thats why you haven't forced me, partially because you can't and partially because you want something more from me. How about this: you tell me what you want, I'll see if I can get it for you from this ship, in case you haven't noticed the people here can get their sticky hands on most anything they desire.

S.N. - Most anything? that is intriuging. What can't they get?

Tirmek - Enough! Spill it!

S.N. - Fine I'll tell you my plan. Step one neutralize compitition. Oh boy what a joke.

Tirmek - You didn't...You did.

S.N. - :D
------------------------

Rakshasa Sorcerer - We've assembled all 50 pieces of the eye of terror, scattered around the planes.

Still slightly crispy Rakshasa Bard - Why did I get the ones in the realm of fire?

Rakshasa Assasin - Shove it spoony
---------------------------

Tirmek - Do they know that thing was just an alter piece?

S.N. - Apperently not.

Tirmek - ... I'm embarrased that I share genetic information with them.

S.N. - This is why we need someone not of the noble houses, with blood untainted with inbreeding. Someone strong enough to stand in the light and say "I am Rakshasa, I am lord and master of this domain, none shall defy my rule"

Tirmek - Why not you then?

S.N. - I am of the shadows.

Tirmek - What you need is to leave me alone.

S.N. - Why wont you rule?

Tirmek - Gee I'd love to have a couple thousand minions at my command, each one more treacherous and viscious than the last.

S.N. - They won't betray you, you are already too strong for most of them, and as you grow you will become -

Tirmek - Older, nothing more.

S.N. - You need not cease your studies.

Tirmek - What do you want?

S.N. - Nothing, but to serve the Knightmare prince.

Tirmek - Look into my eyes and tell me what you want.

S.N. - I ...want... I want to do what your father did! I want to do what your doing!:weep: I don't want to live life hiding behind one mask after another. Bowing and scraping to more powerful Rakshasa. I want to feel sunlight on my fur. I want to stop running and hiding.

Tirmek - Hahahahahahahaha!

S.N. - I don't think its that funny.
urial angel of death

11-04-06, 09:59 PM		OOC: Thanks Kale. :D

IC: Way back when...

On a cliff over looking the two armies stand two figures. One is a black haired young man who would look about seventeen if he were human. He is dressed in a black leather outfit, with those impractical looking belt sleaves and pants you see in so many animes. The other is slightly older man in his twenties. He has long white hair that is twisted back into numerous dreadlocks.

young man: Was he really going to start without us, Heraet?

Hereat: *chuckle* No Sa'vor just knows us well enough to know we'd be just barely on time.

young man: Alright then. Release the prisoners!

An insectiod looking dragon flies lower over the Thranish army. Men fall from between the cracks of its chitinous armor. When they land the army is thrown into chaos and confusion.

young man: Isn't it beautiful Heraet. Such wonderful creatures sandslaves. The Thanes are reluctant to kill their former companions, yet our forces hold no such reservations.

Heraet: Our? *chuckle* Don't group me in with you Hatori. I don't rely on minions to do my dirty work. *draws twin kat- masterwork bastardswords* Now if you'll excuse me.

Hatori: Just remeber to give me some time to get in the swing of things.

Heraet: We've fought together how many times and you still remind me at the begining of every battle.

Hatori: Just get out there.

Heraet charges on to the battlefield while Hatori puts lit sticks of incense into the various belts and buckles on his arms and legs. Smoke spreads from the incense until it envelops Hatori's entire body. From the cloud of smoke pour all manner of monstrosities.
rampant

11-05-06, 12:12 AM		Tirmek - I'm sorry, its just you're not very smart.

S.N. - WHAT! I may not be some pampered Prodigy! But I'm not stupid! I got this far didn't I?

Tirmek - Right into a trap? I'll admit your timing was good. You came in while my aunts were... "distracted". Terra and Lisa are out, kithle and chalky are bilking spoony.
--------------------

Spoony i mean rose - Ok this is enough You can't beat a royal flush.

Chalky - 4 assasins:D

Rose - whaaaaaaaaat!:uh-huh:

Kithle - Here read the rules. (hands rose a rule book labled a bards guide to poker)
------------------------------

Tirmek - Not that those two have been all that reliable. You let spikey lose to distract my associates.

S.N. - Associates? really? I was under the impression you had something a little more interesting planned for the wolf-girl:D

Tirmek - Which one? there are two.:embarrass

S.N. - The little bloodzerker, her sister reeks of fox.

Tirmek - I have no idea what you're talking about.

S.N. - You are Rakshasa, even if your only half, you will reach maturity in only a couple more years. You can't be that much younger than me. You know full well what I'm talking about.

Tirmek - I'm her friend first, I'm not going to push her into anything she doesn't want or isn't ready for.

S.N. - What is this? Nobility, chilvalry, this is weakness! You are the Son of Toren, take what you want.

Tirmek - Lets pretend for a moment that either sister isn't my equal in battle, and that their parents weren't scarier than all hell, and that my aunts wouldn't skin me alive, and my mother wouldn't hold me down. I don't even want to think about what Great uncle Terrek will think of.

S.N. - Your family is full of scary people.

Tirmek - Dead bloody right! Anyway with those assumptions say I did? She would plot my demise, every moment of every day, and even in her sleep. Even without her power, that is an enemy right there and one with nothing to lose. You should know that power isn't everything. Considering you've beaten several more powerful Rakshasa to me. Any of them would have attacked me by now, and been slaughtered.

S.N. - Yes your twice the size of any -

Tirmek - Its called a soulmeld, my avatar seems to like this knightmare prince idea.

S.N. - Anyway your point?

Tirmek - What does taking things give you? Things. No allies, no one you can trust. Nothing that lasts. Nothing that gives purpose. Purpose is what people need, purpose is what our people need. Purpose is something that they need to find for themselves. I am a Sage, and a young one at that. I'm not going to help people too arrogant to admit that they aren't better than everyone else. I put up with the results of their ego everyday at school. I am not going to babysit them as well.

S.N. - There's nothing I can do to convince you?

Tirmek - No, and please don't even go there. Listen you don't seem to bad Maybe I can help you.

S.N. - Whats the catch?

Tirmek - You won't ever be able to go back.
Charles Phipps

11-05-06, 01:32 AM		*Jarlot appears on a huge video screen before an assemblage of the Kings of Eberron*

Jarlot: I am now addressing the Alliance of the Four Nations!

Jaela: Yes, duh. *Jaela blows a bubble with her chewgum*

Jarlot: These teenage years will be awkward.

Jaela: Dork.

King Steve: I went burning peasant villages today! JUST BECAUSE!

Aurala: I like pretty dresses....and intrigue.

Jarlot: I've decided to harness the power of the BROTHERHOOD OF JARLOT to CONQUER the Four Nations.

Kings and Queens: *crickets chirp*

Kaius: Uh...huh.

Jarlot: In any case, I have developed a giant...

Jaela: Laser?

Jarlot: HA! Shows what you know! It's an....orbital....MASS DRIVER! HA! It drives meteor swarm spells by the thousands on places!

Jaela: Soooo different.

Jarlot: Tremendously so and if you don't turn over ALL power in the Four Nations over to me then I will repeat the Mourning on all your lands!

Jaela: Okay.

Aurala: Servitude is better than destruction. We surrender....Emperor.

Jarlot: WHAT!?

Kaius: We give up.

Jarlot: :twitch: Uhhh I didn't expect....

*pause*

Jarlot: You guys suck!

*clicks off*
Kaizer_Ryu

11-05-06, 02:27 AM		Ketler: So now that the Nations have surrendered, what are you gonna do with this? *points to the Mass Driver*

Jarlot: Khorvaire was just a start. It's high time those pompus, inbred, whiny Aerenal's learned who's the TRUE master of the world!

Michael: I still don't get how this thing works...

Jarlot: Ah, good. A flimsy excuse to demonstrate the brilliance of my plan.

Getting out of his chair, Jarlot walks over to an open area, above which is suspended a humanoid-size model of Ebberon. Off to the side is a high walkway, where a lever and Shrodigger stand.

Jarlot: Lower the Globe!

Tifa: Lower THE GLOBE!!!!!

Shroedigger pulls the lever and the globe comes crashing down onto Jarlot's head.

Jarlot: *muffled* OW! *sarcastically* Nice job, son! You've succeeded in turning me into a freaking Jack-in-the-box! Get it off, it's dark! It's dark!

Several Redshirts hurry over and pull off the globe.

Jarlot: I'm ok! I'm ok... Now, release the Meteor!

Tifa: Release THE METEOR!!!!!

Shrodigger holds up the meteor model tied to a string. He lets it go, causing it to swing down and nail Jarlot in a rather sensitive place.

Jarlot: *cringing* OH! OH, NOW WAY!!! WAY TO GO, SON! YOU'VE JUST INSURED YOU'RE THE LAST OF MY CHILDREN!!

Shrodigger: *anime sweat drop*

Michael: Are we gonna crush Aerenal now?

Jarlot: No, son. We're going to inform them of our plans, give them a generous ultimatum, then wait for a while as they send agents out to stop us. Of course, we won't beef up security or even pay attention to suspicious activity within the base.

Michael: That makes less sense than normal.

Jarlot: You still have much to learn in order to be an evil overlord, son.

Michael: Why don't we just-

Jarlot: Shh!

Michael: Wha-

Jarlot: Shh!

Michael: But I-

Jarlot: Shh!

Michael: Would yo-

Jarlot: Shh!

Michael: What are-

Jarlot: Hey, Micheal. Knock knock.

Michael: ...who's there?

Jarlot: Shh!

*ad infinitum*
Charles Phipps

11-05-06, 02:42 AM		OOC: Hahahaha.

So perfect ;-)
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-05-06, 08:23 AM		OOC: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
IC:
Bunny: Why is it evil overlords never realize that if you unleash your doomsday weapon on an inhabited area you loose that area and its inhabitants that could be added to your evil empire? I mean, I'm the god of death, normally I'd be pulling the level myself, but even I have my standards.

13: The question now is whether Jacob Hunter is going to play the dashing and obviously more competant spy?

OOcat: That would be too obvious. Let's make it Rose!

Jarlot: Rose?

Austin Rose: Ya, baby!

Jarlot: GUARDS!

Austin Rose: Judo chop!

OOcat: Heck, lets make this a warband of Roses.

El Spooño fights off a bunch of guards with obviously fake swordfighting moves. The guards fall down because that's what they've been trained to do.

Thorn appears in a cloud of smoke and fires gas canesters at enemies and lashes out with ad-libbed martial arts, while his half-orc sidekick Mooringtower looks on from the sidelines.

OOcat: On second thought, this is too much.

All the Roses disappear.

Silver: So who's it gonna be? Because I need to come up with a hot love-interest with a terribly punned name.

Inevitable of bad puns: Cliché-programming…overriding…normal…function…

OOcat: We'll stick to Rose. He's got the suaveness, plus we can always kidnap his wife and use her as the hot fem-spy.

Zella (in a holding cell): I was wondering how long before this happened again.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

11-05-06, 08:52 AM		Ash apears in Jarlots comand room, looking eager "I want in."

Jarlot "You what with the what now?"

Ash "Word domanation, raining fiery death from the skys, Hurting Rose. Its my kind of weekend... Also Im hoping to borow the massdriver to use in the conflagaration cup."

Jarlot "Okay... Your creapy. What skills do you bring to the party any way?"

Ash "Every super villan needs a colorfull male agent who persitantly harasses the 'hero' agent, surving death and killing suporing cast members. Also I managed to get here without breaking a sweat. Oh I brought Cole so Shrodinger would have someone to play with, means less arbitary leaver pulling."

Jarlot "You need a descriptave name, one thats oddly menacing like 'Oddjob' or 'Jaws'...Oh, right."

Ash "Your just figuring this out?" :D :mage:

Jarlot "Alright, your in, you get an executave salary, dental and medical, and I'l let you use the massdriver when your off duty. Now go, you know what you have to do."

Ash "Attack him savagely but inefectaly while inadvertantly droping enough hints taht hes able to track us back to our headquarters?"

Jarlot "Exactly"
rampant

11-05-06, 12:42 PM		Ketler - Build a mass driver Ketler, build me a soulstoring orb ketler, you'll have to put your gundams on hold ketler, you're not allowed to build an eva ketler, i wanna build what I wanna build when i wanna build it!:rant:
----------------------------------------------------

Tirmek (still maintaining eye contact) - You have a choice, but ask yourself this first. Do you have anything worth going back for.

S.N. (cringing) - my... or the... no:weep:
Kaizer_Ryu

11-05-06, 03:02 PM		Lisa: All these places are nice and all...but...

Terra: They're not quite out of the way enough?

Lisa: Exactly.

Terra: Why don't we try some of the other universes we visited? Most of them have all existensial threats already eliminated by the heros, so they'd be nice and quiet.

Lisa: Oooooo...I like that idea. Let's go.

Terra: Where to first?

Lisa: Your idea, you get first pick.

Terra: :D *flash of light*

-----

Marle: :blush: Do you mind?! :blush:

Lisa: :embarrass Oh, dear.

Crono: :blush: ... :blush:

Terra: :embarrass Right, sorry. We're leaving now.

*later*

Terra: :mad: You did that on purpose, didn't you?

OOKaizer: Sorry. Couldn't help myself. :D

-----

*URIAL BEWARE: CHRONO CROSS SPOILER*

The pair watches a group of adventurers from a short distance away. There are two young men, one dressed in blue shorts and a silver shirt with a red bandana, the other in a brown military uniform carrying twin swords. The young lady with them is dressed rather scantily in red shorts and what seems to pass for half a shirt. The man in the military uniform appears to be rather unhappy about something.

Young man in uniform: I can't take it anymore! SAY SOMETHING!!!

Young man in bandana: ...

Young lady: Oi, Glenn. Calm down, mate. Yer buggerin' out.

Glenn: I WILL NOT CALM DOWN! I've been traveling with Serge for how long? And the only time I've heard his voice is when he became the bad guy!!! :hoppingma

Serge: ...

Glenn: :banghead: WHY CAN I UNDERSTAND YOU?!?!?!

Young lady: I don't see what yer wiggin out about.

Glenn: You have no room to talk, Kid! When's the last time you had a sandwich?!

Kid: For tha' last bloody time, I'm not Anorexic!

Serge: ...

Glenn: You be quiet! No! I mean...GAHHH!!!

Serge: ...

Kid: Ha! See, mate. Even Serge here thinks you need to get a girl.

Glenn: Like you did?

Kid: :headexplo THAT WAS JUST THA' ONE TIME! THERE'S NOTHIN' BETWEEN ME AN' LEENA!

Serge: ...

Kid: That's it! I'm gonna kick both yer arses so hard, you'll kiss tha' moons!

Terra and Lisa slowly back away...

OOC: Rei gave me this idea. I was gonna do it during the honeymoon, but got bored. This just seemed like a prime opportunity. If you want them to visit some place really badly, go ahead. This is merely for our amusement. I'm not sure how long I'll keep them away (not very long), so make it within the next day or so just to be sure.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-05-06, 07:51 PM		OOC: :bored: I hate slow days...

IC:

Seeing his chance to escape again, Izzy goes for the door before Sarah can catch him. Unfortunately for him, Sithis cuts him off with a rather nasty uppercut. As he sails through the air, Sarah hits him with a roundhouse, sending him careening into the wall. As he bounces off, Elina's spiked chain wraps around him and drags him to her feet.

Elina: Game...

*viscious three-way beating*

Sithis: Set...

Izzy is now quite disoriented from the repeated blows to the head.

Sarah: Match.

He is also quite tied up.

Sithis: Who's carrying hi-?

Elina is dragging him along the floor (which is covered in splinters, mind you).

Izzy: :weep:

Sithis: Nevermind.
Charles Phipps

11-05-06, 08:42 PM		Some crazy motivational posters then

http://i125.photobucket.com/albums/p67/Rolypoly2020/SovietSuperScience.jpg

http://i125.photobucket.com/albums/p67/Rolypoly2020/Politics.jpg

http://i125.photobucket.com/albums/p67/Rolypoly2020/Widow.jpg

http://i125.photobucket.com/albums/p67/Rolypoly2020/Poster2.jpg
rampant

11-05-06, 09:37 PM		Tirmek - Hey guys.

Sithis - eh?

Elina - Whats up?

Sarah - Did you get'em?

Tirmek - Actually I need you two's help there.

Sithis - Can you hold onto spikey?

Izzy - My name is name is IZZY!:mad:

Tirmek - Yes sure and Spoony's name is Rose. Gag him.

Izzy - Aww not again.
-------------------------------------

(back in the room S.N. is a whimpering ball of fur and cloak)

Elina - What did you do?

Sarah - And can you teach it to me?

Tirmek - I just maintained eye contact a little too long. Listen this is what I have planned... (starts whispering in their ears)

Elina and Sarah - :devil:
rampant

11-06-06, 01:16 AM		Satnak - Huh waz happening? I take a few hours off to ... "cuddle" ... and the ship's in an uproar.

Ketty - (zipping on deck) About time come on we got about half a dozen more of these to track before we're sur we got the real one.

Satnak - Wah? :uh-huh:

Tirmek - Please mother no need to be so melodramatic. I think I've managed to resolve the situation quite nicely.:D

Sithis - Oh he's got that smug look again.

Izzy - MRRRRRRPH

Sithis - Quiet you!

(Emerging from below decks)

Elina - Branford and Hopeforge are proud to present this seasons hippest look.

Norbaz - Who gave that kid a mic?
----------------------------------------

Sarah - Ok kid that's your cue so don't screw this up.
----------------------------------------

S.N. proceeds up the stairs onto the deck.

Elina - As you can see our model is wearing a Cashmire sweater, courtesy of Ms. Greyholme, this time of year even the fur-bearers need to keep warm. Note the pleated skirt coming down to the shins, adds a touch of classic flair. Finally the glasses add the finishing touch.

Maladren Ravenok - Female Nazarune Rakshasa Diviner (forbidden schools necromancy and evocation) 1/ Unseen Seer (complete mage) 3

Maladren is quiet book worm at heart, but her culture's overwhelming pressure has twisted her outlook somewhat. She expects harsh treatment, especially from those more powerful than she. If pushed she will react with malice, unless said pusher is more powerful than she is in which case she becomes meek and cowardly. Kind words and fair treatment leave her off-balance as she has had little experience with such things. Physically she is small for a Nazarune, and lacks physical prowess. She has a lot of scars on her face and body, the results of being the smallest and slowest. Her cunning and wizardry were the only things between her and elimination as unfit.

Her original goal was to bring back the Knightmare prince and worm her way into his good graces. Instead she has accepted a different option; she remains on the FF in exchange for keeping the other Rakshasa from finding Tirmek.

Elina - How is that working for you by the way?

Malandren - ...um ok, i need to work on something a little more permanent, but this should work for now.

-----------------------

(painted on the side of the hull)

He's not here.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-06-06, 01:31 AM		(painted on the side of the hull)

He's not here.
:heehee :rofl: :heehee :rofl: :heehee :rofl:

Oh my GODS that's funny. The best part is that, given the intelligence level the Sorcerer, Bard, and Assassin pursuing him have displayed, it'd probably work. :D

You get my :mrt: plushie as a reward for best mental image.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-06-06, 12:18 PM		…given the intelligence level the Sorcerer, Bard, and Assassin pursuing him have displayed, it'd probably work.
(painted on the side of the hull)

He's not here.
Phsychology-OOcat: Not to burst anyone's bubble…

Thorn: Ha-ha!

Phsychology-OOcat: …but wouldn't it work better to have a big glowing sign saying "He's right here!"

Other-Phsychology-OOcat: No, no, that's for intelligent people who think too much. You do that so that they think one step ahead of you in the "That's what they want me to think" process. Really stupid people don't think enough for that sort of trick to work, they just go with the first thing they come across.

Phsychology-OOcat: Oh, you're probably right.
*********
Maladren Ravenok - Female Nazarune
Silver: :eek: Competition! AAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!! But Sarah/Tirmek is such a great combination! But I can't let that stand in the way of any possible fulfillment of my purpose!

OOKaizer: I think I feel better. :devil:

13: :D It's what I do.

Silver: Unless…………

OOKazier: :eek: ……………:( It's what you do.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

11-06-06, 12:31 PM		OOC: I just found this on line, looks like Spoony has founded a band... http://gamesreloaded.com/animation/loz:we-are-the-champions folow link if you like Zelda. No popups ect from that sight of wich I am aware.

Rose "I feel so, Emasculated..." :uh-huh: :yuck:
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-06-06, 03:19 PM		OOcat: That reminds me: we need Jingo to don a weird half-helmet/neon hairpiece and infect Spoony with lycanthropy for the next game.

OOC: TWILIGHT PRINCESS FOREVER!

Zella: Maybe I'll ge to do something in this game.

OOcat: Yeah, it's been, what? Since Ocarina of Time? Wouldn't it be fun to play as Zelda for once?
Charles Phipps

11-06-06, 03:34 PM		Samus Aaron is Zelda!

:-)
rampant

11-06-06, 06:36 PM		Zella (in tricked out chozo armor) - I could get used to this:devil:
--------------------------------------------

Maladren - (i.h.h. I'm gonna die, those little jerks tricked me into coming up here... good to atleast get to feel the sun on my face before i go) *anime sweat drop*

Satnak - ... I'm going back to my room, I'll call you when the baby comes.

-exit-

Ketty - What is this *stalks towards Maladren with blades drawn*

Clang!

Tirmek - (interposing with his hammer) Mother calm down. I've had a chance to talk to her and she's not going to -

Ketty - Talk! Talk! You can't trust a Rakshasa's words!

Tirmek - Mother please -

Ketty - They're a bunch of lying, scheming, cowards without a shred of common decency!

Tirmek - If that's how you feel mother, I'll be going then. I'm sure you don't wish to associate with a lying, scheming coward without a shred of common-

Ketty - (grabs Tirmek and zips off)
--------------------------------------------------

Ketty - :weep: I'm sorry Tirmek, my baby boy, I'm so sorry.

Tirmek - As am I mother I knew you would have an adverse reaction to Maladren, so I intencionally set up her introduction to catch you off gaurd. This way she not only knows to keep her distance from you, but I get to settle this without you changing the subject. ...I am a Rakshasa mother, I can't deny it, and neither can you.

Ketty - NO :mad: :weep: ! You're nothing like him, you're brave, kind, and honest.

Tirmek - True, but that makes me less my father's son. No less a Rakshasa, I have their power, the endurance, the shapeshifting, the claws and a limited form of the telepathy. I have FUR for crying out loud.

Ketty - You are my son! and my son-

Tirmek - Can no longer afford to hold back.

Ketty - Huh?

Tirmek - I have never used the shape-shifting, the mental powers or the claws that are a direct result from my Rakshasa blood. I hate and despise what my father was, and I understand that most rakshasa would do the same if they thought they could get away with it. But the ones like me and Maladren have the right to live without paying for their sins!

Ketty - I'm sorry, I... Just don't want you to go through what I did with them. I saw you standing there and I thought of the time I met Toren.

Tirmek - I understand, just calm down. She's not a threat to us and she can't look us in the eye and lie. Besides I got her into the ships files, she'll be living here, not on the island. I don't think she'd be safe there.

Ketty - Alright but she's on probation.
------------------------------------------------

Maladren - Whats going on where's Tirmek?

Sarah - Probably keeping his mother from running you through.

Maladren - He's so fast.

Elina - Yeah he's a great fighter.

Sarah - Not that great.

Elina - She's just mad she can't beat him.

Sarah - Its not like he can beat me.

Maladren - Why not, he's the son of a god?

Elina - He inherited no deific or fiendish abilities, just the powers of any half-blood. The rest is intense mental and physical training.

Maladren - (i.h.h. what is it about these people? why is Tirmek different from all the other Rakshasa?)
urial angel of death

11-06-06, 07:23 PM		Volrath: Big deal I am grandson of the original god who- *collapses on the ground in pain* Owww! Empathetic link not good! It's time and oh gods it hurts.

Sarah: Uncle what's wrong!

Volrath: *strained breathing* Your aunty is having the babies. go get someone to help.

*girls run off*

Volrath: OOWwwwww! It feels like orange it being squeezed throught my-*sceen cuts*
rampant

11-06-06, 07:33 PM		P/Y/R - Isn't this volrath's job?

Satnak - He's still running around, like a cockroach with its head cut off.

P/Y/R - Isn't that a chicken?

Serene - She doesn't belive that chickens can do that. My silly girl always eats them too quickly.

*CONTRACTION*

P/Y/R - *SQUEEZE*

Serene - Also I don't think Volrath could take that kind of pressure.
Charles Phipps

11-06-06, 08:28 PM		OOC: Alas, I'm going to be gone for a bit until I can get my internet working again.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-06-06, 09:15 PM		Maladren - (i.h.h. what is it about these people? why is Tirmek different from all the other Rakshasa?)
Sarah: You don't seem so bad. I was actually expecting someone more...

Elina: Vicious? Intimidating? Arrogant?

Sarah: Something like that.

Elina: I must say, letting Izzy out was brilliant. Three potential troublemakers out of your way in one move.

Maladren: (i.h.h.) A...compliment? What are they up to? What could they possibly want from me?

Sarah: Since you're going to be living here, should we show you around?

Maladren: Ok, what do you want?

Elina: :confused: Huh?

Maladren: No, seriously. There's got to be something.

Sarah: For just...showing you around?

Elina: Can't it just be because we want to?

Maladren: (i.h.h. :twitch: ) Uh...

Sarah: Sheesh. Tirmek said you'd perceive alterior motives in everything, but wow. Just wow.

Elina: Sis, don't be so rude.

Sarah: *under her breath* It's true...

Elina: You'll get used to it soon enough. C'mon.

The girls lead Maladren into the ship as her brain struggles to process 'unmotivated kindness'.

OOC: This is more fun than I imagined. :D
Kaizer_Ryu

11-06-06, 11:59 PM		Maladren: :twitch: Chili monsters, a crazy Changeling who thinks he's a Shifter, a smash-happy Dwarf, a Vampire who may not be a Vampire, an insufferably cheerful Solar Deva, a pair of Gnomes with the ability to make anything and everything explode and survive, a Magnificent Bastard Half-Mindflayer, a Spoony Bard as Captain, a whipped Daemon Lord, a whipped Deicide, an excruciatingly cute Shifter and her Winter Wolf familiar lover, a pyromaniacal loser who's neither dead or alive, an adorable teddy bear carpenter, an omni-thrope...what's next? :twitch:

Sarah: Uncle Volrath is a Daelkyr Half-Blood. He and Aunt P/Y/R are in the process of having their first children. You'll meet them later.

Elina: Our parents are difficult to sum up, so we'll just have to introduce you to them when they come back.

Maladren: What's that supposed to mean?

Elina: You'll find out. :D (OOC: A Paladin on a Pirate ship is always good for mental trauma.)

Sarah: Oooooo! We should take her to meet Kanatash and Caralot! I wanna see the baby again!

Elina: Maybe later. I think our new crewmember has had enough for a while.

The three stop in front of Maladren's new room (created from the finest previously non-existing space in Ebberon).

Elina: Any questions before we take our leave?

Maladren: Well...one comes to mind. Why do you two hang out with Tirmek all the time?

Sarah: Well, we're in the same class at school...we're roughly comparable in maturity level...

Elina: All of us claim Satnak and Serene as our Aunts, though his claim is more legitimate.

Sarah: But I think the biggest reason is that we've got a lot in common.

Maladren: (i.h.h.) With the Knightma-? No...Tirmek. How can they be anything like him? Wait...are they messing with me? They said not to read too much into things...could it just be a mind game? But they seem honest enough, and they have been nice to me for no obvious reason like they said... Grrr...this is all so confusing. The only thing that makes sense here is the treatment of those "Redshirts"...

Elina: You ok?

Maladren: Huh?

Sarah: You spaced off for a second.

Maladren: Oh, yes. I'm just tired I guess. I'm going to lie down for a while.

The girls wave as they head off to see what Tirmek is up to while Maladren sits at the edge of her bed.

Maladren: Oy... I can't wait to meet the couple that spawned those two.

OOC: If you want, you can do her initial reaction to Terra and Lisa when they get back, rampant. This shall amuse me greatly. :plotting: :evillaugh
rampant

11-07-06, 12:49 AM		Maladren - A window...Oh gods a window. I can wake up with the sun on my fur...

*knock knock*

Maladren - um...uh... come in?

Sarah - Our parents are back!

Elina - You want to meet them?

Maladren - ....um sure

Terra - So this is the new girl.

Lisa - How's the ship treating -

Maladren - Puh...puh..PALADIIIIIIIIIIn , Trapppedtrapped gotta escape!
---------------------------------------------

three seconds later

Sarah - How did you get stuck in the ceiling fan?

Maladren - HIDE ME!
Kaizer_Ryu

11-07-06, 02:20 AM		OOC: I said when they get...nevermind. Oh, well. It seemed no one wanted to mess with them anyway. *shrug* Meh.

And it must be said that the makers of Dragon Quest VIII are EVIL INCARNATE!!!!!!!! No real spoilers for those of you who haven't played it yet, but IT'S LIKE WATCHING LORD OF THE RINGS: RETURN OF THE KING!!! IT ENDS FIVE TIMES, BUT YOU CAN'T STOP WATCHING!!!!!! (well, playing in this case). Am I done? Yes! ...wait...ok...now I'm do-wait, no...ok...now-nope...

WHY DO I LOVE THIS GAME?!?!

IC:

Lisa: I do believe that's the first time someone's reacted to me in that manner since...

Terra: The Devil May Cry Universe?

Lisa: That was a sight to behold, wasn't it? The legions of hell, fleeing in terror.

Terra: Until we reached the Boss, which Dante took out in...what...five hits?

Lisa: More like three.

Maladren: *whispering* What are they talking about and why isn't your mom trying to kill me in painful ways?

Sarah: We've been to other universes and Momma kills things only if they've done really horrible stuff.

Maladren: :twitch:

Lisa: Like she said, I'm not going to hurt you.

Maladren: You're sure you're a Paladin?

Lisa: Last time I checked. :D

She still refuses to get down.

Lisa: Ok, ok. If it'll make you feel better, we can go somewhere more open.

*later in the cafeteria*

Maladren: You're WHAT now?!

Terra: Like I said, I'm a Half-Fiend/Half-Celestial Elf meshed with the soul of a Kalashter.

Maladren: :twitch:

Terra: She's been doing that a lot lately, hasn't she?

Elina: All day, actually. It's hard to remember sometimes how much of a shock this place can be.

Maladren: :twitch: A Paladin with Werewolf blood and an Elf with Angelic and Demonic infusions. Not to mention you're both female. How did you-?

Elina: Don't ask.

Sarah: Trust us, it's better you don't know.

Lisa: The chaos inherent in the fabric of the ship takes getting used to, but it makes life infinitely more enjoyable once you adjust.

Terra: *telepathic link with Lisa* Should we tell her you're a Princess, too?

Lisa: :rolleyes: You know I don't like that title.

Terra: ;) I'm just teasing...

Lisa: :) I know. But I think we should wait on that. She's still freaked out I'm a Paladin. If she finds out I'm next in line to the Thranish crown, she's likely to flip. Same goes for the knowledge that you finished off Arijani.

Terra: Agreed. (back to reality)

Maladren: The Werewolf blood explains the ears and tails, and the Outsider heritage explains the eyes and the raw power, but I still don't get why they're similar to Tirmek.

Terra: That you'll have to figure out for yourself. It's not too hard to see when they're together, but it's difficult to explain.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

11-07-06, 07:20 AM		[B]Maladren[/B... a pyromaniacal loser who's neither dead or alive,...


Ash and Nalfen, as one, to each other "You going to let her call you a luser like that?"
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-07-06, 07:55 AM		Saberiel enters the cafeteria was Lady scuttling along in monster crab form. Catching sight of Terra and Lisa and the kids she urges Lady back into baby form and carries her over.

Saberiel: Mind if we sit here?

Lady: *schpeil of gibberish*

Lisa: Of course. :)

Sarah (leaning over to Maladren): Can you believe that Lady was born before us?

Maladren: Well…if she's the offspring of demons that's not entirely—

Sarah: Succubus/astral deva.

Maladren: Huh, what?

Terra (interjecting): Come on now, no whispering. Maladren, Lady is the product of the mixing of the blood of Saberiel here, half-demon/half-nymph, and Aerith, and astral deva.

Maladren: :blank stare: *falls backward stiffly*

Terra: Maybe that's enough for one day.

OOC: Now Maladren needs to find out that Aerith is aboard, which will make her freak out. And when she starts having a crises of identity we can introduce her to Tony, another rakshasa who's stepped off the tank of Evil.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-07-06, 10:12 AM		OOC: Nit picky time (just for a moment, I promise). Aerith is a Solar Deva. And I kind of implied that she already met her. But, now that I think about it, a full scene would definitely be funnier. Later, of course. The poor girl needs a chance to recover before we break her further.
rampant

11-07-06, 11:47 AM		Maladren - Huh?

Sarah - You fainted.

Elina - Too much shock for one day.

Tirmek - Are you ok?

Maladren - (i.h.h. concern...for me?) ... Yeah i'm fine I guess.

Tirmek - Good you were out for a whole night.

Sarah - She probably needs help to get around the ship still.

Elina - No way Sis, Serene can take care of that, you're coming to school with us and taking the midterms like the rest of us.

Sarah - Grumble.
-----------------------------

Maladren - So um you're Tirmek's aunt?

Serene - Yep.
rampant

11-07-06, 12:54 PM		Maladren - What's this about school and midterms?

Serene - Tirmek, Elina, Sarah, and Sithis attend Satnak's old school.

Maladren - the Island

Serene - Yep.

Maladren - (i.h.h. thats just too much irony, Tirmek attending school the same place his aunt learned the skills she used to kill his father)

Serene - Satnak teaches a few classes, conditioning and advanced energy manipulation.

Maladren - (i.h.h. thought too soon)

Maladren - So if your Tirmek's aunt are you the youngest or the middle child, I know Ketty was the older sibling.

Serene - Oh no, I'm Satnak's wife.

Maladren - Are their any straight couples on this ship?
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-07-06, 02:09 PM		OOC: Nit picky time (just for a moment, I promise). Aerith is a Solar Deva.
OOcat: :P Whatever.
**********
Maladren - Are their any straight couples on this ship?
Silver: Define "straight". :D

Maladren: :eek: :lop: (OOC: That's her fur poofing out) Where the F*** did you come from?

Silver: I'm your :pile:-drive.

Maladren: :twitch: Please tell me you're joking.

Silver: Nope, I'm EVERYONES' :pile:-drive. :devil:

Maladren: How…?

Serene: I think the poor dear's had enough today.

13: Not on my watch. :monk:

Silver: You see, I'm the goddess of fertility and all its "associations".

Maladren: And what about him? (points to 13)

13: No gender here. And I'm the god of living life.

Bunny: Translation: e's the god of everything that makes you wish you were dead. Which brings us to me: I'm the god of death.

Maladren: :mymy: (i.h.h. Help me.)

Silver: So to answer your question: Kanatash/Caralot, Spoony/Zella—

Rose: I HAVE A NAME!

Silver: —Marish/Cuddles, Silence/Devon—

13: What ever happened to them?

Bunny: I think I saw Devon a few posts back.

Silver: —Jarlot/various women including Aerith, Marish, and Tifa, Norbaz/Andrea—

Bunny: Except Norbaz has dissappeared, so if you know any more good rakshasa cooks…………

Silver: —Naz'roth/Tara, Fluffy/Slaypaw—

13: You'd think we'd at least see Fluffy around.

Bunny: Yeah, little ball of fuzz was good for a game of "Taget Practice".

Silver: —P/Y/R//Volrath……………I think that's it. Plus there are at least two gay people aboard.

13: Except one of them's a dog, so he may not count.

Silver: And the debates still out on whether Lucky counts as a woman or a man for the purposes of determining sexual orientation.

Maladren: Oh………uh—

Silver: Don't worry about it, almost everyone else makes the same mistake. Our main two lesbian couples are just in the spotlight a lot.

Bunny: We forgot that Mendova and NJ26 are celebate.

Silver: :mad: Grrrrrrrr……………

Maladren: (i.h.h. There are GODS on this ship! Hope they aren't the smiting Good kind.) Uh, what do you do ifyoudon'tmindmeasking?

13: We sit around and comment on what everyone else is doing.

Maladren: ………………………That's it?

Bunny: We also take care of a couple fundamental functions of existance, but yeah, that's it.

Maladren: :confused: Why?

Commentary Crew: :blink: There has to be a why?
Crystalforged

11-07-06, 02:51 PM		OOCrystalforged: Actually I'm not sure Kanatash/Caralot would count as a strait couple. More like all of the above plus a few more.

Maladren: Who the hell are you?

OOCrystalforged: Just one of the E.B.N.E.

Maladren: The what? :confused:

OOCrystalforged: The Entities from Beyond Non-Existance or Entity for short. Everyone here, including yourself, are imaginary constructs of the entities that exist only on an internet forum and inside our heads. You have no more existance than we are willing to give you and we control every aspect of your life making free will only an illusion.

Maladren: (eyes closed, clutching head) ...

OOCrystalforged: You're trying to stop your head from exploding right now aren't you?

Maladren: (slight nod)

13: You are now officially my hero.

OOCrystalforged: :D Great do I get the plaque now?
rampant

11-07-06, 03:10 PM		Kithle - Talk to the lightsabers punk!
---------------------------------------------

Maladren - Huh what's this?

Kithle - Its just a little something for your head.

Maladren - (i.h.h. these people are so nice)

Serene - Hold on a -

Maladren - GAAAHH *out like a light*

Serene - You liquid keelhauled her.

Kithle - 3 reasons, first she no longer has a headache

13 - she will though:D

Kithle - two she needs to understand that most of us still can't be trusted, third and READ THE PLAQUE
Charles Phipps

11-07-06, 03:55 PM		OOC: I like Maladren.
urial angel of death

11-07-06, 04:18 PM		Volrath: Oh god it feels like I'm passing five hundred kidney stones at once! *head asplode*
-----------

Terra: Kithle have you delivered the pain-killers to Volrath yet?

Kithle: Why of course :schemes:
rampant

11-07-06, 04:35 PM		OOC: I like Maladren.

thanks
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-07-06, 05:00 PM		OOC: I like Maladren.
OOC: Me too. I always like seeing certain members of the evil monster turn out to be good. Even the psychotically-fun evil that a lot of FF characters express is less offensive than the realy zealous evil that gets used for D&D. Heck, it's better than zealous good!
Charles Phipps

11-07-06, 05:01 PM		OOC: Elain Cunningham of Elf book fame once had a huge fan backlash for Thornhold because she believed Paladins were naturally fanatics and disturbing people from the Paladin's Handbook description. Then, oddly enough, she found out most players believed Paladins were liberals struggling against repressive Non-Paladins!
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-07-06, 05:18 PM		OOC: Elain Cunningham of Elf book fame once had a huge fan backlash for Thornhold because she believed Paladins were naturally fanatics and disturbing people from the Paladin's Handbook description. Then, oddly enough, she found out most players believed Paladins were liberals struggling against repressive Non-Paladins!
OOC: Miyo Miyazaki, quintessential Lawful Stupid I'm-The-Ultimate-Good-Person-Here, :fight!: WHY-CAN'T-YOU-UNDERSTAND-THAT-AND-FOLLOW-ALLONG?! :rant:
WE-SHOULD-ALL-ACT-LIKE-GOOD-LITTLE-MINIONS!! :hoppingma
(Evil Loser :rolleyes: ). OOTS! READ IT!
Charles Phipps

11-07-06, 06:22 PM		Jarlot: Okay, let's see about the modern weaponry....

Ketler: MECHA!

Jarlot: No.

Ketler: Err....Warforged that are Giants!

Jarlot: YES!

Ketler: ...that can be piloted.

Jarlot: Maybe.

Ketler: By Schoolgirls!

Jarlot: No.

Ketler: DAMNIT!

Jarlot: Listen, I don't ask for much. A couple of tanks with sharks with laser beams on their head. Tanks and ZEPPELINS. Zeppelins are good and pure but what do you give me? CHICKEN LEGGED ROBOTS! STOP IT!

Ketler: Oh come on! Just one walking tank!

Jarlot: Fine!

Solid Rose: Umm....actually, I blew that up.

Jarlot: What the....who the hell are you?

Solid Rose: Rose's prestige class is Video Game Hero which means he can switch modes. I'm in commando mode.

Jarlot: Uh huh. That explains how you were Simon Belmont, Link, Ryu, and...

*Ketler pulls out a remote and flips it so Rose is now dressed in overalls and a red hat with an "R" on it*

Rosio: HEY PIZANOS! ITS THE SUPER ROSE SUPER SHOW!

*Jarlot GRABS the remote and switches him back to Solid Rose*

Solid Rose: Thank you. In any case, I've broken through the ranks of your minions and fought your six lesser bosses.

Jarlot: Does that include Sniper Tiffa?

Solid Rose: Yes.

Jarlot: Psycho Kanatash?

Solid Rose: Yes.

Jarlot: Vulcan Michael.

Solid Rose: Yep!

Jarlot: How about Revolver Ocelot?

Solid Rose: Isn't that a cat?

Jarlot: Yes.

Solid Rose: Then yes, I beat Marish with her crossbows.

Jarlot: How about Gray Foxy, you know the cyberneically enhanced Jaela?

Solid Rose: I also beat her. That's when Otaketler wet his pants.

Ketler: I did not! Much!

Jarlot: Well this is where I suppose I have to reveal that you're actually the superior clone of Jarlot Senior.

Solid Rose: Inferior clone?

Jarlot: Yes, I got all the inferior recessive genes and you got all the superior dominant genes.

Solid Rose: Uhh...genetics doesn't work like that.

Jarlot: Oh woe, inferior genes. I must now destroy you to prove myself superior.

*Elizabeth Hurley in a cat suit rapels down*

Jane Hunter: I'm ready to help Solid!

Solid Rose: Hey! Nice butt!

Jarlot: Uhh...Rose.

Solid Rose: This is Jane Hunter. Sexy isn't she?

Ketler: Do you want to tell him about changelings and gender?

Jarlot: Not really.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

11-07-06, 06:30 PM		Chanse sits in an quirt corner of the bar, a fresh deck of cards in his hands, restlessly shuffling them together, cards rasping like beetles, flowing like mercury under is incarnum wrapped fingers. He had made a begining, on this ship of anarchy he had found a start, but it wasnt enought, he needed power, he needed more targets.

The souls of the dead he lived on for demanded asmuch. his mind skirted the memorys, of a drab grey building on a blasted hillside on the moorland, but did not linger, would not linger on what had happened there.

he cut the cards, drew a card. The Ace of Breland. He knew what to do.

"Ver, Jack, ready the men, we take Argonth, but first we'll need to prepair."
rampant

11-07-06, 07:06 PM		Maladren - Ugh!

Terra - Hows your head?

Maladren - Not too bad, what happened?

LIsa - Kithle snuck you a Liquid keelhauling, its a drink with a nasty hangover.

Terra - I'm amazed, that stuff is pretty powerful usually people wake up with a massive hangover.

Maladren - Oh gods yes I've got a hangover!, its just in my eyes!

13 - you called:D

Maladren - What are you two doing back?

Elina - You were out a while, schools out.

Maladren - Is Tirmek back?

Sarah - Nahhh he went home with his mother, said he had to study, study study study train train train some days thats all he does!

Elina - Maybe if you studied more you'd have figured out your own catfall power by now.

Sarah - :P

Malandren - (i.h.h. I'm never gonna figure out what they have in common with him)
urial angel of death

11-07-06, 07:17 PM		Sarah: Let me show you my universal game controller!

Elina: Umm Sarah sweety that's just an Atari (tm) joystick* with star stickers on it.

Sarah: Oh I'll show you.

---------

Rose suddenly finds himself unable to move.

*Alert*

Jarlot: Minions kill him.

*gun shots*

Rose: Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!

Nalfien: *by walky-talky* Rose, Rose? RRRROOOSSSEE!

-----------

Sarah: :weep:

*think about the implications of that word and its spelling
Charles Phipps

11-07-06, 09:55 PM		Continue?

Yes

No

*Clicks Yes*

***

Solid Rose: Umm....actually, I blew that up.

Jarlot: What the....who the hell are you?

Solid Rose: Rose's prestige class is Video Game Hero which means he can switch modes. I'm in commando mode.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-07-06, 10:15 PM		OOC: :heehee

IC:

Sarah: Oh, we completely forgot!

Elina: What? ...oh, yeah! Mom!

Terra: Yeah?

Sarah: Did you and Momma find a place for the summer home?

Lisa: Yep. I think you'll like it.

Elina: Can we see it? :bigeyes:

Sarah: Please?! :bigeyes:

Terra: Are you done with your homework?

Sarah: Um...yes. :shifty:

Lisa & Terra: *Mom look*

Sarah: Ok, no! *pouts*

Elina: Plus we still need to train some more.

Sarah: :mad: That wasn't part of the question!

Elina: But you know as well as I do what will happen if Aunt Satnak finds out we've been slacking.

Sarah: :weep: I don't wanna go up the wall an extra 100 times... :weep:

Lisa: We'll go this weekend. But ONLY if you're all done.

Sarah & Elina: Yes, Momma...
rampant

11-07-06, 11:49 PM		In the library

Maladren - Divinations, divinations, ah here it is advanced divinations.

Kerrith - *snort* Divinations are lame gimme a good summoning spell any day. Hey you're that little trouble maker that had the whole ship in an uproar. Great just what we need another over-groomed panther reject.

Maladren - I'll just go over here then. (i.h.h. he shouldn't talk about Tirmek like that)

-moves to a seat by the window-

Kerrith - (i.h.h. hehehe)

As Maladren opens her book a half-dozen fiendish centipiedes crawl out of the pages and attack.

Maladren - Dammit DR/Piercing and Holy or not this still stings!

Kerrith - Hahaha good to know I was worried they might not hurt Tirmek.

Maladren - *summon giant fiendish centipede*

Kerrith - *dismiss* nice try kitty cat, hey where'd she go?

A bookshelf drops on Kerrith.

Maladren - Oh bloody kyhber what am i gonna do he's a much stronger magic user than I am! *RUN AWAY*
luna18moon

11-08-06, 12:10 AM		Slaypaw: :mad: Looking for a cat? YOU GOT A CAT!!
Begins savaging Kerrith for even thinking to insult the mighty cat.
Slaypaw: You are arrogant! Stop thinking of yourself as superior to everyone else. ACTUALLY THINK ABOUT PEOPLE IN EBERRON INSTEAD OF WHATEVER COUNTRY YOU CAME FROM!!!
Turns to Maladren, who is assessing her options for escape.
Slaypaw: Welcome to the ship. :D
OOC: I will probably get blasted for this, but defenitely worth it to get Slaypaw's opinions of him out there.
Crystalforged

11-08-06, 12:19 AM		On the deck Kanatash is playing with Kitten who is now toddeling rather proficiently around the deck.

Kanatash: Come here, come to me. Who's a good widdle baby. (gratuitous baby talk)

Kitten: Mama.

Kanatash: Look at that! (embraces Kitten) Her first words!

Kelter: How is that possible? She's only a few days old?! No wait, don't tell me, let me guess. It has something to do with being an abberrant freak of nature or ties to Xoriat or you having space and time as your ***** or whatever.

Kanatash: Actually Caralot thinks its an overactive pituitary gland. Personally I just think my entity is impatient after sitting on his ideas for so long.

Satnak: (walks onto the deck and sees Kitten) Aww, she's so cute.

Kitten: :bigeyes: [giant anime eyes] Goo goo gaa gaa.

Satnak: So cute... Can't resist... (sweeps up Kitten in a bear hug so tight that it compresses random bits of graphite into dimonds)

Kelter: :mymy: Oh dear

Satnak: (pulls back to find Kitten giggling and hanging on her arm) Hm, kid either I'm loosing my touch or you're a lot tougher than you look.

After being set back down Kitten toddles past Satnak again. This time when Satnak reaches out an arm to pick her up Kitten instead grabs Satnak's arm and lifts Satnak bodily over her head before setting her down behind her and toddling onwards towards a shiny coin on the deck behind Satnak.

Satnak: :blink: Stronger than she looks too.

Kanatash: We're not entirely sure what she's capable as of yet though she should come into more powers as she matures. She got a very intersting blend of factors going on, my kalashtar lineage, my link to Xoriat, Caralots genetic enhancements, her parent coming from different multivereses, being concieved in a video game universe. There's probably more too and we're not sure exactly which factors got passed on.

Satnak: She seems incredible advanced considering her age.

Kanatash: I know, Kelter was just commenting on that in fact. Caralot and my best guess is she should advance to a point roughly equivilant to Elina and Sarah in about the next month before she slows down to something more normal.

Satnak: Have you thought about her education.

Kanatash: Caralot and I have been talking about that actually. We've been thinking about homeschooling, after all I doubt even the island has genetic courses on par with Caralot's expertise. That said we are thinking of having her take a few classes on the island, I figure you're people can give her far better combat training than we can. After all being incorperal its hardly like I can teach her combat and I can't think of the last time Caralot got in a fight unless you count "wrestling".

Satnak: Do you two have much money put away for this? I have my connections but the island is still expensive.

Kanatash: Don't worry, I have a very tidy sum tucked away. 5000 years of interest really add up.

Kelter: Wait, I though you said that because of time dilation you were only gone for a couple of days?

Kanatash: Yeah, but I got lucky, I had the forsight to get the planar travelers account, accures according to the the subjects subjective time rather than Eberron standard time. So anyway money shouldn't be an issue. Now if you'll excuse me I need to check on Kitten. I believe she has just jumped over the railing and I'm not sure if she has developed flight capabilities.



Kitten
Female Unnaturally Cute Aberration/Crime Against Nature

The spawn of Kanatash and Caralot, Kitten combines many of the features prized by both her parents. For one she incredibly and irresistably cute to the point where it is completely normal for complete strangers to stop to cuddle her. On the other hand she has begun to display an... intersesting... mindset mainly through a very strange perspective on the world around her. Despite this she has so far proven to be very innocent and niave much to the distress of her parents.

Physically Kitten is identical to the being know as Hello Kitty hailing from a different multi-universe which leads to some interesting characteristics. Most importantly is the fact that she lacks an apparent mouth. She is still able to communicate through telepethy but it still raises a mydiad of questions which neither Kanatash or Caralot are quick to answer. Besides her obscene cuteness Kitten's other abilities are largely unknown, even to herself, although it is likely they will manifest as she ages.
rampant

11-08-06, 12:23 AM		Maladren - Thankyou!

Slaypaw - Meow (no problem kid)
---------------------------------------

OOC: Good to see that Luna's alive, don't worry, he's Nalfein's apprentice he needs to learn.

Nalfein - What are you implying?

Kithle - (i.h.h. strike match)

FWOOM

Nalfein - I'm on fire again aren't I?

Kithle - Yep:D

Nalfein - Got any 2's

Zella - go fish
Kaizer_Ryu

11-08-06, 01:08 AM		OOC: Poor Kerrith (yeah right). Not only is he being taught how to break the rules like Nalfein, but it seems he's taking on Nalfein's propensity for becoming the punching bag. :D

Hmmmm...that could turn into a new Prestige Class :plotting: .

IC:

Volrath: GAHHHHH!!!! This hurts worse than the time my bottom lip was stretched over my head and attached to my belt!!!!!

Lisa: You didn't...

Terra: No, no. That was Urial. From what I understand, Volrath made a crack at her for being "rather man-ish".

Lisa: Seems a bit extreme to me.

Terra: She's younger than I am, so she was still at the tail end of the "akward" stage at the time.

Lisa: Oooooohhhh...right then. *'the deed is now justified' look*

Volrath: :weep: It's not my fault she was a late bloomer... :weep:
Charles Phipps

11-08-06, 02:22 AM		Sarah: LILLLYYYY!

Lilly: Yes My Love?

Elina: LILLLYYY!

Lilly: Yes, my other love?

Sarah: Well we know he takes after the rest of the men in his family.

Lilly: Yes indeed!

Ivy: HI GIRLS!

Sarah and Elina: :love: IVYYYYYYYY!

Lilly: GRRRRRRRR!

Sarah: WHY DID YOU MAKE US WOLF-GIRLS!?

Elina: Yes! Marish flees everytime she sees us!

Schroedigger: *now a 9 year old Jarlot Youth member* I don't!

*Elina and Sarah strike him with hammers*

Schroedigger: OW!

Elina and Sarah: We don't date Nazis!

Schroedigger: Emerald Claw!

Lilly: Yes, my father taught them alchemy and sacrificed his life to defeat the Conquerors of Shambala!

Ivy: Now available on DVD!

Sarah: What?

Lilly: Err, nevermind.

Ivy: In any case, Ivy needs your powers to be able to ressurect Mom.

Sarah: Huh?

Ivy: You're both massive well springs of magical power that is cross dimensional in nature. Mom's been dead and in Dolurrh too long to be ressurected. That means she wouldn't even have her memories if we brought her back and that's probably impossible. However, with your dimension shifting powers then it's possible she could be ressurected at an earlier period in history.

Lilly: We just want to see her again.

Sarah: :sniffle: That's so sweet!

Elina: Of course we'll help you!

Lilly: And make out with me?

*The two hit him with a pair of hammers*

Later

*Horrific screams and abominations of alchemy emerge from the room along with a flash of bright light*

Jarlot: Kids, they never learn.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-08-06, 07:37 AM		Bunny: :headexplo Stop bringing people back to life! Do you realize I have to deal with them every time they die?! It creates more work for me!

Silver: I should mention that I agree with Bunny unless it results in more :pile:.

13: You all know what I think. :D

Silver: So when are Caralot's parents coming over?

OOcat: If you thought Crystalforged was lazy, get a load of me.

Silver: Come on, I worked hard on this one! I only get one set of grandparents to ooze over her. Not to mention the female uncle and the half-sister.

OOcat: You do realize this is going to be another opportunity to mess with Maladren? :bored:

13: BRING-THEM-ON! :cheer: BRING-THEM-ON! :cheer: BRING-THEM-ON! :cheer:

OOcat: *sigh* Give me a minute.
cypher_zero

11-08-06, 09:05 AM		Maladren walks out of the library shaking her head, not watching where she’s going.

Maladren: This ship is crazy! (bumps into something and looks up) Gwah?!

Terrek: Hello child. New onboard?

OOC: Anyone care to post her reaction?
.
rampant

11-08-06, 10:18 AM		Maladren:hides:
Lord Kale Fangblade

11-08-06, 02:51 PM		Way Back When. Part 2

arround Sa'vor the battle has ended, thousands of the thranish dead are scattered around Sa'vor. Karranthi soldiers are busy dragging the various bodies onto the newly arrived carts. Duke morgan strides over to Sa'vor his armour is bloodied and he has a slight limp in his right leg.

Morgan: how is it that you come out of every battle without a scratch on you? *taps Sa'vors Darkwood banded mail* You dont even where full plate anymore. how the hell do you do it?

Sa'vors violet eyes scan the field. Raises a hand. theres a flash of purple light that engulfs his whole form. he now wears black robes, a black cloak and a black hood. with the same runes as the pervious set along the edgings. but this time in crimson. he still wears the same sash, and the slight bulk of his banded mail can be seen under the robes.

Sa'vor: Im a Sanguine Court Vampire. the first of that breed. my body is rather resistant to attacks. that and i heal extremly fast.

Morgan: Hows my Daughter doing?

Sa'vor: Drusila ? she's well. ruleing the countrys a lot easyier now than it was at the beggining. the lords are not as likely to ignore our laws, they still belive their exepmt from them. but at least they do it in the shadows. Though most of the Houses hate me. they hate me because im a warlock. they hate me because of my mixed heritage. i see it in their eyes every time they look at me, i can taste their fear, and hear their minds clammering for them to flee.

Morgan: if i didnt know you so well, id call you paranoid.

Sa'vor: *slight chuckle* yes. it does seem so. though times are safer than my old life.

Sa'vor suddenly doubles up in pain.

Morgan: Sa'vor? what is it?

Sa'vor: *gasp* the Midnight Palace is under attack. Drusila is in trouble.

Sa'vor raises his hand, a slight wince of pain in his features and a stream of blue light flows across his form. the pained expression leaves his face as the magic begins to take effect.

Sa'vor: quick. we need to move fast.

He stabs a black gloved hand at the air and briefly one of the many runes on his hand burns with a firery light that pieces even the glove.
a portal opens, within the landscape of the plane of shadows can be seen.

Sa'vor: quick. this way will be the easiest, once within the shadow realm i'll teleport us within the walls. then we can use the twisting passages of the shadow world version of the Midnight palace to enter the Throne room.

Morgan: why such a difficult journey?

Sa'vor: suprise. also, the Throne room and the private sections of the Palace are heavily warded. both mine and Drusilas own designs.

they passed through the portal, and Sa'vor raised his hand again, this time a nimbus of red motes surrounded them. around them the landscape blurred as within an instant they stood within the walls of the Palace. Sa'vor strode confidently through the doors, passing through them as if they where no more substancial than smoke. Morgan followed his fullplate clanking as he walked, Sa'vor stopped and raised a hand, there was a flash of red light as a staff appeared within his hands. it was made of Black wood with platinum decorations and tipped with a large black sapphire. Morgan could almost feel the dark enregies within it begging to be realised.

Sa'vors left hand drew a wand from his Sash, he continued towards the throne room doors. once again he passed through them almost ghostlike, it was almost as if the shadow matter was parting before him.
they both stood in the throne room.

Sa'vor: Heres the plan. we hit hard and fast, offensive spells and summoned minions pick off the enemy minions and small spell casters. i'll hit the big spell casters, you cover me while i cast. agreed?

Morgan nodded and drew his sword.

Sa'vor raised a hand and more red motes danced from it, each one landing on the ground and forming into a Karranthi Skeleton. The Skeletons drew their weapons, the rasping sound of unoiled sheathes filled the air.

Sa'vor: Ready?

Morgan nodded.

Sa'vor once again jabbed his hand at the air infront of him, a portal forming around it, They crossed through into the real world.
Around them the throne room was in tatters. whole pillars had been crushed into dust, the throne upturned. black greasy smudges where all that remained of the gaurds.
Floating before them was Drusila, surrounded in a ghostly green nimbus of light. in a dark circle around them where hundreds of figures, wearing grey tattered cloaks. their faces where completely skeletal though a few still possessed some dessicated flesh and eyeballs. each one of them had their staffs pointed at the Sa'vor and Morgan.
Standing next to Drusila was a towering Grey robed figure, within the hood was a pale human face. its eyes where pools of ghostly green fire. its long tattered beard was twisted and dirty. his face was old and withered and displayed considrable sadistic satisfaction at the current turn of events.

Greycowled master: ahh. Sa'vor. i was wondering when you would arrive. welcome to the party. *glances at the skeletons* it appears you brought friends. unfourtunatly they wont be needed. Disarbre!

The Skeletons collapsed into dust.

Morgan: *pointing his sword at the Greycowled master* Release my daughter or suffer the concequences wizard.

Greycowled master: you are not required for the preceedings. unless you want to end up like your minions i'd keep silent.

Morgan:*angrily* How-

Sa'vor gave him a significant glance. Morgan bit back his words.

Greycowled master: now that the guests have been set up. lets move on to the main event shall we?

( to be continued)
urial angel of death

11-08-06, 05:02 PM		A present from all of the underage girls on board to Ketler
here (http://i14.photobucket.com/albums/a340/belphanor/lolicon.jpg)
urial angel of death

11-08-06, 05:57 PM		Hatori and Hareat are picking through the battlefield, looking for loot, collecting Hatori's minions, and among other things looking for Sa'vor.

Hatori: Where is the little prick!

Hareat: Calm down, getting mad takes all purpose of seeing a friend.

Hatori: I guess you're right.

Hareat: No if you'd just calm down I'm sure I could locate him. *closes eyes concentrating* He is in the manor and is in danger. *opens eyes* We need to get there fast!

Hatori: I guess I'll save him, besides there might be new nasties to add to my collection. *pauses* I can take us through Dementia Space. Stitches! Let's go!

A mishapen flesh golem cobbles over to them. It appears to be made of various parts from countless races, the most pronounced of with are his half-dragon head and wings. It is dragging a corpse in its over-sized right arm.

Stitches: Master please give me a little more time. I found a good one. *lift the corpse to reveal it as a beautiful elven battle-maiden*

Hatori: What do you mean to do with her.

The flesh golem grins in a way that its draconic features should not have been capable of.

Stitches: What else master?

Hatori: Alright just be quick about it a clean up after yourself.

Stitches gently caresses her soft face for a moment before brutally ripping into the flesh. The monster toer into the flesh and pulled back with the prize he had been looking for among the corpses, a new piece. In his hand Stitches craddled two perfect elven eyes. It then proceeded to pluck out his own eyes and replace them with these fragile new orbs.

Hatori: Come one!

Stitches: Coming master.

The three of them disappear in a cloud of incense filled smoke.
cypher_zero

11-08-06, 06:25 PM		Terrek: Hahaha! If you’re that scared by the mere sight of me, you’d better just stay under the chair… but I don’t think you need to. I’m Terrek. I believe you’ve already met Serene, my daughter?

Maladren: Uh huh…

Terrek: Come now, this place isn’t so bad! Just ignore Kerrith; he’s an idiot. Here let me help you up… (Extends clawed gauntleted hand to her)

Maladren: Ahhh!!!

Terrek: Calm down, I’m not going to hurt you.

Maladren: (looks at him warily) I got the impression from Tirmek that you were really powerful… (looks around for better hiding place)

Terrek: That I am, but I have no interest in harming you. And stop stalling. If I wanted to kill you, you’d be dead by now so come out of there already.

Maladren: That’s not very reassuring…

Terrek: Fine. Have it your way. I need to go check up on my son. (walks off)

Maladren: (i.h.h.) OhmygodIcan’tbelieveheletmego! Any of the Raksahasa would have killed me for bumping into them like that!

At that moment, a small shape flies past at amazing speed. As Maladren stares after it, she realizes it was a small winged child half made of metal. A moment later Terrek flies past, apparently in pursuit of the child.

Terrek: Ohcraphowdidhelearntoflyalready?! Get back here Rashour! (flies off after his son)
.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-08-06, 06:57 PM		Terrek: Ohcraphowdidhelearntoflyalready?! Get back here Rashour! (flies off after his son)
13: I now have you in my power. :devil:
rampant

11-08-06, 08:12 PM		Satnak is settling down to sleep when

Rashour - gaa

Satnak - *yawn stretch* *catch*

Rashour - geh:confused: *caught*

Satnak has nodded of while holding onto Rashour.

Serene - Awww they're so cute:D

Rashour - :confused:
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-08-06, 08:35 PM		Rashour - :confused:
13: No one is safe.

OOcat: Will you stop doing the monoposts?

13: It's not my fault you're too lazy to do Caralot's family arriving.

OOcat: Do you think my work is easy? :mad:
rampant

11-08-06, 08:41 PM		13 - not while I'm around:D
Kaizer_Ryu

11-08-06, 09:21 PM		Tirmek: Word to the wise. Be careful around that one.

Maladren: He seemed nice enough...

Tirmek: He also tends to act like the Rakshasa you know, though far less violent. He is scheming, patient, and subtle. Do not accept aid from him unless you know the consequences. Even then, avoid his brand of 'help'.

Maladren: What has he done?

Tirmek: I've only heard most of it second hand, but I'll give you a few examples. Terrek returned the Half-Dragon Sa'vor's soul to him. The price was that the two were linked, with Terrek in control of the direction power flowed between them.

Maladren: Sa'vor...Sa'vor...where have I heard that name?

Tirmek: Last living heir of the Dragonmark of Death.

Maladren: :eek: :eek: :eek:

Tirmek: And that's not all. As a wedding gift for Terra and Lisa, he gave them each a powerful magical item that, though it would not give him direct control over them, would allow him to influence them greatly under the right circumstances.

Maladren: And they accept that?

Tirmek: Oh, not in the least. Sa'vor can't really do anything about it, but he resides in another reality now. When Terra discovered the enchantment some time later, they both rejected his gifts.

Maladren: He's tried three times, and little has come of any of them. What's so dangerous, then?

Tirmek: Those instances involved three of the most powerful beings in Eberron. There is little chance that most anyone else would stand much of a chance once ensnared. And there is one other thing I must tell you.

Maladren: Yes?

Tirmek: You know Serene is Terrek's daughter. Though I refuse to believe there is any malice or insincerity on her part, I have good reason to suspect she was little more than a means to an end.

Maladren: ...Satnak?

Tirmek: Indeed. Though I dare not say so to her face. Serene truly is a blessing for my aunt, but her father is another story.

Maladren: I get the feeling you have another reason not to like him.

Tirmek: You should see what happens to Elina whenever he's around...
rampant

11-08-06, 09:41 PM		Maladren - (i.h.h. ok now he's scary)

Tirmek - Anyway *fakecough**fake throaght clearing* The girls are up to something and the last time they had those looks on their faces I ended up Orange.

Maladren - :confused: :uh-huh: ... I'm gonna need my cards.
-----------------------------------------------

Sarah - Hehehe he's gonna be a real "Pink Panther":plotting:

Elina - Yes this ...gonna...be..fun...

Sarah - ... He's behind me isn't he?

Elina - Yep:(
Charles Phipps

11-08-06, 09:51 PM		Because this scene can't really be DONE by text alone.

Way Back When

Chapel

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t62RwTU4O7k&mode=related&search=

Achika: My Rose will come for me.

Prince Boranal: YOUR ROSE IS DEAD! I killed him myself!

Achika: Then why is there such fear in your eyes?

Prince Boranal: Finish the Ceremony!

Impressive Clergyman: Do you...

Prince Boranal: Yes, she does and so do I. Get to the end!

Impressive Clergyman: Then I pronounce you husband and vivvvfe.

Achika: No!

*Is carried off when a strange time space wormhole appears and Achika falls though*

Rose: *seeing the loss of his bride* NO!

Prince Boranal: GUARDS! SEIZE THEM!

Terra: Well this isn't how the movie is supposed to go!

*huge brawl begins as Prince Boranal escapes to the side*

Rose: AFTER HIM!

*Jarlot hoists Rose up piggy back style and Rose rides him like a horse, accidentally hitting his head in the door*

Jarlot: Sorry.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-08-06, 10:22 PM		*Is carried off when a strange time space wormhole appears and Achika falls though*
And ends up on the deck of the Forgotten Freedom in our present.

Achika: What? Where am I?

13: You are here to find out why you shouldn't marry Rose.

Achika: Who are you?

13 (spooky voice): IIIIIIIIIIII am the ghoooooooooooooost of Maritaaaaaaaaaaaal Fuuuuuuuuuuutuaaaaaaaaaaaare.

Achika: :eek: W-what d-d-do you w-w-want to sh-show me?

Suddenly Rose runs past, panting something about his life being an über pain, pursued by Maivy.

13: Rose is too Spoony for you. Plus we like his current wife.

Achika: And who's that?

Silver: Zella.

Achika: The porno-elf princess? She a talentless b*tch.

13: Actually, I'm fairly certain you have to have a lot of talent to get kidnapped as often as she does. I mean, there's no way that many villains are going to kidnap a princess in that short a time span: it's got to be arranged beforehand.
luna18moon

11-08-06, 10:50 PM		13 (spooky voice): IIIIIIIIIIII am the ghoooooooooooooost of Maritaaaaaaaaaaaal Fuuuuuuuuuuutuaaaaaaaaaaaare.
...
13: Rose is too Spoony for you. Plus we like his current wife.
True beauty can be found in the insanity of the Forgotten Freedom :D . :thumbsup: to SilvercatMoonpaw!
Kaizer_Ryu

11-08-06, 11:10 PM		Way back when

The brawl suddenly comes to a halt. A messenger runs in and hands a note to Terra. It reads:

Terra,

Count D'Cannith has kidnapped me and is planning on doing several unpleasant things in the very near future. So stop playing around and SAVE ME!!!

Yours,
Zella

P.S.: Let's see if you can do this better than that Spoony yet Dashingly Dashing Bard.

Terra: Son of a-!

She shifts into Bear form and charges through the guards, sending them flying.

*elsewhere*

Zella is chained to Count Aaren D'Cannith's bed as he leers over her. The room is gaudy and screams "lame attempt to attract women".

Zella: You know that my Prestige Class guarantees I'll be rescued in the nick of time, right?

Aaren: Only if there's someone to rescue you. Your little boyfriend is off chasing the Prince. :evillaugh I'm going to take my time with you, my lovely.

*SMASH*

The door shudders on it's hinges.

Aaren: WTF?!

Zella: Who said I needed a boyfriend? :P

*SMASH*

The door breaks down as a rather large and irate bear enters the room.

Aaren: :eek: :eek:

Terra: *returning to normal* You really should reconsider the neon sign that reads "Count D'Cannith's Pad". The arrows leading this way and all the signs advertizing the "perks" of being in your company didn't help much either.

Aaren: *looking her over* My, my, my. Seems this is my lucky day. If you wanted to join in so badly, you could have asked.

Terra: *shudder* :yuck: Ugh. Fat chance. I want you to let her go. We can do this the easy way, *pulls out a Scimitar* or my way.

Aaren: *sigh* I really wanted to save my energy for the fun part, but I guess I can wait. *pulls out a greatsword*

Terra: Compensating for something?

Aaren: :mad: Shut up! *charge*

The two clash in a flurry of blows, neither giving the other any quarter. Even in the confined space of the room, they manage to make it a spectacular show of sparks, swordplay, and insults. The two lock blades one last time.

Aaren: *puff* You're *wheese* quite good for a woman. *huff*

Terra: I'll take that as a compliment, seeing as I've been messing with you the whole time. :devil:

Aaren: Wha-

*Rusting Grasp*

Aaren: Oh crap.

Jumping back, Aaren whips out a repeating crossbow and fires.

*Wind Wall*

Aaren: :hoppingma

As his last move, Aaren throws a poison tipped dagger, striking Terra in the shoulder.

Aaren: You'll find it quite difficult to move with that in your system. It has a strong paralytic effect. Any moment now, you'll be mine. :evillaugh

Terra pulls out the dagger, shrugs and tosses it aside as she heals herself.

Terra: You don't deal with Druids much, do you? That, or you really are too pathetic to actually get a girlfriend.

Aaren: :twitch:

Terra: Are you done now?

Aaren: I...uh...*runs away*

Terra: Oh, for the love of-!

Zella: :ahem: Ahem! Did you forget I was here?

Terra: ;) How could I? I just wanted him to beg for his life in front of you.

Zella: You don't do 'hero' well, do you?

Terra: Well, I *AM* Evil you know.

Zella: Meh. Fair enough. Are you going to get me out of here now, or what?

Terra: Hmmm... *devious grin*

Zella: Later.

Terra: :raincloud Ok...

OOC: I was under the impression that Zella was just his girlfriend. Even so, what's so bad about Spoony having two wives? Can you imagine the torment? :D
Charles Phipps

11-08-06, 11:15 PM		Zella: I'm still trying to get that marriage annulled. I wasn't in the right frame of mind.

Rose: All Seven Times!?
rampant

11-09-06, 01:17 AM		Satnak - Geeze Zella either marry him, leave him, or kill him. Stringing him on like this is just cruel.

Zella - Oh yeah I suppose I should just go ahead and marry the first little hottie that comes along?

Satnak - I'm just saying either dump the chump or stop playing head games with him. Either you have feelings for him or you don't.

Zella - Its just not that simple.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-09-06, 07:42 AM		Zella - Its just not that simple.
Zella: I'm a Video Game Princess. Another requirement of my prestige class is that I string along the hero while not having an obvious relationship with him. I'm stretching that rule as it is.

OOcat: That's like, so true. Especially since you represent Zelda, and everyone knows that she and Link have the hots for each other.
rampant

11-09-06, 11:34 AM		Satnak - Great:rolleyes:

Serene - what's wrong silly girl?

Satnak - My pants don't fit anymore:mad:
-------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Not a chance Elina I know what happens everytime you get xen'drik.

Elina - Aww you broke my defesive lines.

Sarah - (i.h.h. :plotting: just let those two duke it out while sit here and build my empire :evillaugh: )

Maladren - Is it my turn? I'm kinda new at this risk game
Chrys

11-09-06, 12:16 PM		As Rose runs from the pixie a shadowy frog like shape watches them pass. Then the shadow leaps grabs Rose and ushers him in to one of the lower parts of the ship.

????: Hell-o Mister Rutabaga…

Rose: What is going on? Where am I? What are you?

????: Well Mister Rutabaga, I am MangoStreetCarStoatBlackrot D’ducky the Ninth, but you can all me …

Rose: Kermit * trying to stifle a laugh *

D’ducky steps out of the shadows and stands up to his full height all 7 feet, his lavender and Burn Umber skin seen now in the smoke light from the near by torches.

D’Ducky: Oh yes lets call after that stupid puppet just because I’m a Chaond! Let me tell you something Mister Rutabaga A retarded animal could be green, but it hard to be manly when you skin tone shares key elements with some gay guys shirt! Now I’m not thing of helping you any more!

Rose: What’s a Chaond?

D’Ducky: You know a Chaond… the Chaos-touched… * sigh * I’m basically a half-Sladdi.

Rose: Your Mom Slept with one of them?

D’Ducky: No it doesn’t work like that. * suddenly he dressed in a white lab coat and pull a full sized chalk board out of one of it pockets, the goes one in a bad Karnan* You zee vhen zee Slaad implants zee egg in to a humanoid host, the egg take root in the area of the body next to the Faggiggley Gland and the Squedelliespooch. There it feeds on the raw chaotic energy of the body until it is ready to hatch. If the egg is removed the chaotic energy has to go some place so it is all passed on to their next kid.

Rose: Wait what the hell is a Faggiggley Gland and I think you Squedelliespooch up.

D’Ducky: I thought bards were supposed to be smart. Every one knows that Faggiggley Gland is the gland the regulates magical transformations in humanoids and giant… that’s the reason why only they can become were-beast. And Every one has a Squedelliespooch it the organ that make someone not Spoony… oh you must of had yours removed sorry.

Rose: * Glare * So what can you think you can help me with?

D’Ducky: That Zella woman she is a Video Game Princess right, there is a little know bit of the class… if the hero that is supposed to rescue you is ever kidnapped she has to come and save you. So We arrange for you kidnapping and make her come and get you, Lets see how are it is you and she will appreciate you better.
Rose: Really how do you know this?

D’Ducky: I was raised by Thee Slaadi fighters who some managed to keep having to save this princess from evil space pigs… until she dumped them for two stupid monks.

-----
OoChrys: Yes that’s a battle toad reference, Also There are at lest two old games [for I think the CDI ] where Zelda has to save Link.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-09-06, 12:45 PM		D’Ducky: …Every one has a Squedelliespooch it the organ that make someone not Spoony… oh you must of had yours removed sorry.
Thorn: Fortunately I was able to retain mine.

Mooringtower: But didn' you say that they messed up on your first appendectomy and removed some vestigial organ—

Thorn: That was my…ah…my Humoshomushi gland, yeah, that's it. It's the gland that makes people…ah…loose direction.

Mooringtower: You know, I never had my Humosumo gland removed.

Thorn (through gritted teeth): Precisely my point.
D’Ducky: I was raised by Three Slaadi fighters who some managed to keep having to save this princess from evil space pigs…
OOcat: Yeah, those were the days. *sniff* I miss my childhood shows.

Bunny: And I thought the Final Fantasy fanboys were pathetic. :bored:
OoChrys: …Also There are at lest two old games [for I think the CDI ] where Zelda has to save Link.
OOC: :rant: AND WHY DID THEY NEVER RELEASE THEM ON THIS SIDE OF THE PACIFIC? :rant: It's called the Legend of Zelda for crying-out-loud! And from Super Smash Melee we know that she's pretty good in battle (heck, watch the old TV show).
Chrys

11-09-06, 01:39 PM		oochrys: The they were not nintendo games, but they used the same names [like nintendo rent out the rights for a bit, ] I think they were for CDI or TurboGrafix... one was a Side scrolling 'shooter' [all you do is cast spell at the on rush of foes] the other was a point and click style adventure where you had to save link from Gannon evil sister [ or it was gannon in a dress :eek: ]

The best part was when she kneed Link in the groin for trying to kiss her at the start of one of the games
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-09-06, 01:48 PM		The best part was when she kneed Link in the groin for trying to kiss her at the start of one of the games
13: *sigh* I guess we can't get Zella to do that to Rose.
rampant

11-09-06, 02:00 PM		OORampant - I can! I can! Rose is the one who...

Zella - I knew it was that dirty dirty half-elf!
Goes off to find rose

13 - How did you know?

OORampant - Know what what I just figured Rose was up to something and that Zella suspected him of being up to something. All I did was let her fill in the blank.

Rose - *little girl scream*
Chrys

11-09-06, 02:09 PM		D'Ducky Wow, you suck even more then that earth worm... Now we need some one to write a letter saying they kiddnapped you... I was think that Dragon with the lizardfolk... Wait O know How about some Hobgoblin Princess thats going going to use you to make the worlds 1st Half-goblins.

Silver :D
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-09-06, 04:24 PM		Silver :D
OOC: You get the :turkey: award for that.
IC:
Rules Since Silvercat Read some of Heroes of Horror:
1. You are not allowed to let the flayers see their section of Heroes of Horror.
2. No, I will not tell you what it is.
3. And no, not even if the crew is allowed to watch for free.
4. And you charge other people.
5. And/or the crew.
6. And the Admiral gets a cut.
urial angel of death

11-09-06, 07:05 PM		OOC: funny BoVD tries to be the most disturbing D&D book ever, but HoH tops the entire books with one paragraph.
rampant

11-09-06, 08:11 PM		Elina - Grrrrrrr I just don't get it? How am I supposed to fight in this much armor?

Tirmek - Consider yourself lucky! its just like wearing heavy weights. This shield is completely ruining my balance.

Sarah - Shove it to both of you I look like Jarlot!

Tirmek - Somehow I doubt Jarlot could lift that monster. Its called reversal training because the idea is to force us to look at fighting from a different perspective.

Elina - Explain the book then.

Sarah - Hows that a different perspective on Figting?

Tirmek - ... *thumpx2*

Sarah - Ouch

Elina - Ow
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-09-06, 08:46 PM		OOC: funny BoVD tries to be the most disturbing D&D book ever, but HoH tops the entire books with one paragraph.
13: As if you could already tell their editing department was in my employ.

OOcat: Which paragraph is this now?
Paulon

11-09-06, 09:05 PM		OOcat: Which paragraph is this now?

Page 137, Section Title Aberrations, Subtitle Example: Alien Motives. Second Paragraph.

It describes corrupt and jaded mindflayers and how they 'entertain' themselves by watching the activities and emotions of their controlled thralls doing things that would probably be in the intersection area between Silver and Bunny's areas of interest, with a distinct probability of it interesting 13 as well.

The description of it as being more disturbing in concept than the entire Book of Vile Darkness is fairly accurate.

*sneaks off into the FF library to see burn any copies he can find to protect the innocent minds of the deranged crew from worse damage than Caralot's records shown by Kanatash could inflict* ;-)
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-09-06, 10:11 PM		Page 137, Section Title Aberrations, Subtitle Example: Alien Motives. Second Paragraph.
OOC: That was a joke question. How would I know what was the paragraph said so I'd know to ban it if I hadn't read it?

Speaking of which:
7. Don't get me started on the dragons. They're breeding habits are weird enough as it is.
*…to protect the innocent minds of the deranged crew from worse damage than Caralot's records shown by Kanatash could inflict* ;-)
OOcat: You're just saying that because you haven't seen those pictures. :devil:
luna18moon

11-09-06, 11:09 PM		OOC: I saw that too, it's just disgusting...:yuck: *shivers*
Paulon

11-09-06, 11:10 PM		OOC: That was a joke question. How would I know what was the paragraph said so I'd know to ban it if I hadn't read it?

True. I forgot that. It's so much more reasonable knowing what something is before you ban it. *remembers an old comedy skit where a principal tells a class that she banned a naughty video they snuck in after watching it twice with a male teacher just to 'make sure of how bad it was.'*

Speaking of which:
7. Don't get me started on the dragons. They're breeding habits are weird enough as it is.

The old question of when the dragons ever get around to reproducing their own species given how many different sorts of half-dragons there are?

OOcat: You're just saying that because you haven't seen those pictures. :devil:

There's truth in that too. I'm whacked in the head enough as it is without making things worse. :P
rampant

11-09-06, 11:19 PM		Tirmek - hmmmmmmmmm

Sarah - pretty good. huh?

Tirmek - Yeah, but what does ice cream have to do with anything?

Elina - There's a whole paragraph thats jus Ice cream again and again.

Sarah - I was hungry.:(
Kaizer_Ryu

11-09-06, 11:43 PM		Sarah - I was hungry.:(
:heehee That made my night. Hilarious. :D

IC:

Terra: :rolleyes: I think Serene has been a bad influence on you.

Lisa: Is that any way to refer to me, young lady? ;)

Terra: Sorry, Sensei. ;)

Terra is dressed in a the typical "Japanese schoolgirl" outfit, complete with a short blue pleated skirt, white button down shirt, ribbon in her hair, kneehigh socks, and school bag. Lisa is wearing a long black skirt and matching blouse that seems at least two sizes too small. A small pair of reading glasses are set at the end of her nose, and a pencil is stuck behind her ear, giving her a "hot yet authoritarian" look.

Lisa: :smirk: Ready for your "extra credit" work?

Terra: Hai! :angelhide

OOC: It's not creepy because Sarah and Elina don't dress in schoolgirl outfits.



:mad: Stop looking at me like that!
Charles Phipps

11-09-06, 11:50 PM		Achika: Oh I'm sure you'll come to love me as much as everyone else! Whereas Zella is the Damsel in Distress, I'm the 'Whiny Clingy Girlfriend!' Prestige Class.

13: Huh?

Achika: I basically have numerous abilities based upon my abuse of my boyfriend the hero. Primarily, these relate to distracting him from saving the world.

Satnak: You're kidding.

Achika: No seriously. Here's a demonstration.

*pulls out a memory globe*

***

Rose: I have to go save the world from Sepiafont the world dominator!

Achika: War! War! War! Is that all you care about?! If you truly loved me then you wouldn't fight!

Rose: Uhhh Achika, he's going to DESTROY THE WORLD....

Achika: Aren't *I* important enough?

Rose: You LIVE on the world...

***

Satnak: :blink: Uh huh.

Achika: That's not all! I can use the Childhood Friend special ability to invoke flashbacks of uber kawaii!

***

* 9 Year old Rose looks like a 9 year old Edward Elric*

*Playing with his brother whom looks exactly like Alfonse at 8*

Rose: Yay! I built a castle!

Sunflower: Good for you!

*Achika in pig tails and a dress starts crying*

Achika: I want my dolly!

***

Achika: I've taught this ability to many students!

Tiffa: Sensei!

Yuna: Sensei!
rampant

11-10-06, 12:52 AM		Satnak - How's that super-cute? nothing exploded

Achika - :uh-huh:
-----------------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Ok piloting a skiff is just like using one of these models, only your perspective is shifted and you have alot more mass to move. Thats why its better to practice here, the lack of skiff tubes means we have to work harder to move even these little buggers, the perspective shift can be accomplished with a little astral projection.

Elina - I'll make sure no one else messes with you guys.

Tirmek - Why does that not reassure me?

Sarah - I call the green one.
urial angel of death

11-10-06, 07:20 AM		P/Y/R is holding five new bron children, and Volrath is writhing around on the floor.

Satnak: Volrath it's over!

Volrath: I think this one really is a kidney stone.

Satnak: Eww.


OOC: Chyrs take as many as you want, but leave atleast one for me.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-10-06, 09:06 AM		OOC: Chyrs take as many as you want, but leave atleast one for me.
Silver: With my luck he'll take 4 and combine them into another gestalt. :mad:

13: Shouldn't you be dealing with Terra and Lisa right now.

Silver: Yeah, at least I still have them.
*******
Silver walks in on the Kaizer two just as Terra is extending her tentacles. (OOC: Sorry, the joke requires some clichéing.)

Silver: Tentacles? Come on! I mean, I know you two are more creative than this. Okay, sit down, the real class is going to start.

Terra and Lisa: But—

Silver: I SAID SIT!

Terra and Lisa: :eek: *SIT*

Silver: First off, though, I'd better seal the room.
*********
Several hours later:

Terra: That thing with the psychic—

Lisa: —and the hair, I never even thought—

Terra: —and what was that thing with the body slime?

Lisa: Where does your E.B.N.E. come up with these things?

Silver: Biology freak. :bored: Some day I'll tell you about the giant wasp method.

Terra and Lisa: :mymy:
Chrys

11-10-06, 09:26 AM		Volrath: I think this one really is a kidney stone.

OOC: Chyrs take as many as you want, but leave atleast one for me.

OoChrys Urge to make animated anthropomorphic Kidney Stone rising. Nah I'm only going to take one.

D'Ducky: I know you can be kidnapped by their kids

Rose: ... No I don't want to baby sit. As much as I hate to say it the Goblin thing is the best so far... we all ready killed our dragon limt for this week.

OoChrys Yeah but it seems Silver doesn't want Goblin/Lizard/Chocabo/Spoony hybreds

Rose: What!

D'Ducky Why did the Chocabo cross the road?

OoChrys To have it wicked way with Spoony... But hey don't worry I'm sure some will come to save you befor we get to the eel people.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-10-06, 09:35 AM		OoChrys Yeah but it seems Silver doesn't want Goblin/Lizard/Chocabo/Spoony hybreds
Silver: WHO SAID THAT? :headexplo

13: Seriously, who do you think come up with all these half-X templates? :bored:

Bunny: And is outbreeding dragons to extinction? :ahem:
Kaizer_Ryu

11-10-06, 09:52 AM		Silver: Tentacles? Come on! I mean, I know you two are more creative than this.
OOKaizer: :bored: Did I say anything about tentacles?

Silver: It was a fair assumption, given past behavior.

OOKaizer: If that was the goal, wouldn't it have made more sense to have their roles reversed?

Silver: :smirk: Not necessarily...

OOKaizer: :rolleyes: The goal was the mental image of Terra looking cute and enjoying it. What they did was up to the imagination of the reader.

Silver: Come to think of it, she was rather adorable. But, normally she hates being cute.

OOKaizer: For other people, yes. She loves being cute if it makes Lisa happy.

Silver: ...holy crap she is whipped.

OOKaizer: :D And loving it. But that brings up something that's been bugging me. Why is it that in all these relationships the obviously more powerful member is completely and utterly whipped? I mean, Terra, Naz'roth, Kanatash, Satnak, Volrath...

Silver & 13: :angelhide :plotting: :evillaugh
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-10-06, 09:57 AM		OOKaizer: …But that brings up something that's been bugging me. Why is it that in all these relationships the obviously more powerful member is completely and utterly whipped? I mean, Terra, Naz'roth, Kanatash, Satnak, Volrath...

Silver & 13: :angelhide :plotting: :evillaugh
OOcat: Haven't you ever heard? The submissive always has the power. (OOC: Chalk another one up to CSI. :D)
Chrys

11-10-06, 10:16 AM		OoChrys Wait who said Volrath is more powerful? I mean yes he is whiped with a capital Whip; But P/Y/R is at lest at powerful as he is just more subtel. ;)

D'Ducky: Hmmm You know Pixies taste like chickens... and if she is a dire pixie does that mean she taste like turkey?

Volrath Hey Back off.

D'Ducky No worries, I'm not going to eat her... or any of you kids I'm just say. It just one of the random question that a constantly like: If a tree fall is in a forest and no what is round to hear it hit a monk who is trying clap with no hands does the giant goldfish stop the train at midnight?

Volrath:confused:
rampant

11-10-06, 10:24 AM		Chalky - No he doesn't, because I just ate him.

d'Ducky - You suck
Chrys

11-10-06, 10:29 AM		D'Ducky thats D not d It didn't spen 13 minus 1 yearz in crazy frog school to have a little d in front of my name!

OoChrys: I love that joke
Kaizer_Ryu

11-10-06, 11:04 AM		OOKaizer: Though it probably wouldn't happen, in any protracted battle, Volrath would eventually win despite the two of them being roughly on equal terms as far as power goes.

OOChrys: :waits: And why is that?

OOKaizer: Virtually immortal godling. Volrath can take a half dozen Bigby's Crushing Tactical Nukes at once and come back for more. Thus, he'd eventually win.

OOChrys: Meh, good point. But that would be cool to watch... :plotting:

Volrath: :weep: That doesn't mean it wouldn't hurt. :weep:

OOChrys: Quiet you. Now go make yourself an easy target for John.

He slinks away sadly to float a few hundred yards off the prow of the ship.

John: Why would I want to hurt him? Violence is not the path to enlightenment!

OOChrys: Well, he's...you know...evil and stuff...

John: But-!

OOChrys: Is not one tenant of the path to enlightenment "all things in moderation"?

John: Well, yes...

OOChrys: And have you done anything other than sermons and good will lately?

John: Well, uh...no...

OOChrys: Then it's high time you destroyed something! Hurry, or the path to enlightenment will escape you further!

John: R-right!

*BIGBY'S CRUSHING TACTICAL NUKE*

Volrath: :weep: Why? :weep:

*SKUGGAAFWOOOOOOOOMMMMMM*

Volrath: *now floating paste* Ow. Owie. Ow. Ouch. Ow. Ow. Owie...

*****

13: :evillaugh
Chrys

11-10-06, 11:17 AM		D’Ducky: Ok Mister Rutabaga Here is a rough draft of the Kidnapped letter…

Tuu hame bg Muya Tie Fight:

I Haza yoinked psiffy Mister Rutabaga Anz U caanna stooup meea!!!!1111. Heady Lemar Ellaz with sdk itaas in :pile:

P.S. Muhahahahaha!!!!!!
Rose: What the…?:uh-huh:

D’Ducky: Its written in Sladdi to throw them off…

Rose: Why would a Hobgoblin princess, who is lawful enough to leave a note; write it in Sladdi! :waits:

D’Ducky: Old Pit tang pit tang basket barrel.! :elf: shot the food!

Rose: :uh-huh: Well I can’t argue with that … but where are we going to hide?

Oochyrs: For those of you who can’t read Sladdi:

To Whom It May Concern:

I have taken the dashing Captain Rose and unless you come and save him, I Princess Ellaz will use him in my personal breeding experiments.

P.S. Muhahahahaha!!!!!!


Volrath: *now floating paste* Ow. Owie. Ow. Ouch. Ow. Ow. Owie...



OoChrys: Hey look at it this way You don't have to worry about the kidney stone any more :teach:
Kaizer_Ryu

11-10-06, 10:31 PM		Terra and Lisa are currently in an exhausted heap wearing what appears to be the remains of a pair of Valkyrie outfits.

Terra: There are times your stamina amazes even me...

Lisa: Only an hour to recover? Seems I need to try harder. :devil:

Terra: :cloud9:

-----

Bunny: Are you bored?

Silver: Not quite yet.

Bunny: *sigh of relief* Oh, thank us.

Silver: I still have yet to explore the next level those two can achieve. :plotting:

Bunny: *groan* I don't want to know.

13: :devil: This could be good...

Silver: Well, given that Terra has control over shadow, and appears now to be more or less made of the stuff herself, what would that imply?

Bunny: Awesome new ways to kill things?

13: New opportunities to mess with people's heads?

Silver: ...ok, I should have seen that coming. But that's not what I was getting at.

Bunny: :bored: Figures.

Silver: She should have the ability to do what every Changeling would kill for. Completely reshape her form at will.

Bunny: What does th-Oh, crap... :doh:

Silver: Not sure how long she could keep it up, and it's too bad Lisa can't do the same, but it's a start. :plotting: :schemes:

13: :twitch: :twitch: :twitch: *snap* :devil:

*hours later*

13: :devil:

Bunny: How long is he gonna stay like that?

Silver: Till he figures out which image to inflict on the crew first.
cypher_zero

11-11-06, 01:28 AM		Satnak is settling down to sleep when

Rashour - gaa

Satnak - *yawn stretch* *catch*

Rashour - geh:confused: *caught*

Satnak has nodded of while holding onto Rashour.

Serene - Awww they're so cute:D

Rashour - :confused:
Rashour: *chomp*

Satnak: Wha!? (Sees Rashour clamped on her arm.) Why you! (shakes arm furiously) Ghaaa!

Rashour: Geh? *clamp*

Satnak: Alright little guy, you need to get off. *shake*

Rashour: Wheeeee!

Terrek enters the room and sees his son clamped onto Satnak’s arm.

Terrek: (Pulls Rashour off) Oh there you are! Only a few weeks old and already causing trouble. Ya’know, your sister wasn’t this much trouble when she was your age.

Satnak: (Rubbing arm) You really should keep better track of him.

Terrek: Well, I didn’t think he’d be able to fly so quickly. Or tear his way through walls, or (looks down and sees that Rashour is gone) *sigh* morph his shape and slip right out of my hands.

----------------------------------
*Elsewhere*

A redshirt is walking through the halls of one of the lower decks when he stumbles upon a baby sucking on a gold piece.

RedShirt: (i.h.h.) What the heck is a baby doing down here? (sees the GP) Heh! This’ll be just like stealing candy from a… kobold. (Walks over and takes the GP)

Rashour: :bigeyes: :ahem: *glare*

The redshirt falls to the ground dead. Rashour grabs the GP again and starts sucking away happily.
.
cypher_zero

11-11-06, 01:30 AM		Oops, double post.
REVENGE OF THE ORANGE TEXT OF DOOM!
rampant

11-11-06, 01:37 AM		Lisa - You see this is why we sealed ours.

Ketty - This is why I don't breed outside my Kingdom (animal, plant, mineral, whatever the hell Kanatash is)
--------------------------------------------

Tirmek - I should know better, i really should.

Sarah - I'm Fugging PINK!

Tirmek - Where's my thumping book?

Elina - :heehee:

Chalky - They grow up so fast *sniff*
Crystalforged

11-11-06, 02:07 AM		In Kanatash and Caralot's room. Kitten is doodling on some paper.

Kanatash: What are you drawing there honey?

Kitten: (nervous) Uh, nothing mommy. (tries to hide drawing)

Kanatash: No really, I want to see what my only little princess is drawing.

Kitten: There is no drawing.

Kanatash: Either you're trying to run a matrix style mind **** on me or you're just starting to learn to lie. Either way kudos but I will be seeing that drawing. (telekineses) *gasp* I... I... I don't know what to say. You've got all sorts of diffenent people living in peace and happyness! There's even a rainbow for the deranged lords sake! I've very dissipointed in you Kitten, I thought we taught you better.

Kitten: I'm sorry mommy, I know I'm not supposed to but I don't understand. Why can't people just live in harmony?

Kanatash: *sigh* You're still to young to understand, you'll see as you grow up. The world just doesn't work that way and people don't act like that. You'll see when you're older.

Caralot: What's going on in here?

Kanatash: Our little kitten has gotten some sort of nonsense about goodness within man. She just doesn't see.

Kitten: No mommy, I don't see. I think you don't know what you're talking about. I believe in the fundimental goodness of man.

Kanatash: THAT'S IT LITTLE MISSY, I WILL NOT TOLERATE THAT KIND OF TALK IN MY HOUSEHOLD! YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT!

Kitten: (crying) No mommy, its you who doesn't know what you're talking about! I hate you! I hate you both! I'm leaving!

Kanatash: (indignant) Oh yes? Where are you planning to go? What do you think you can do?

Kitten: (grabbing her hello kitty backpack) You'll see, I'll be just fine. There are good people out there. (walks out the door)

Kanatash: (clinging to Caralot in the doorway) Where did we go wrong, Caralot? Where did we go wrong?

Caralot: I don't know Kanatash. I just don't know.
rampant

11-11-06, 02:19 AM		Satnak - Of course there are good people out there, I married one!

Serene - Hi!

Tirmek - Right there on my character sheet Incarnate (good)

Lisa - I got up fo this?

....

OORampant - I think thats all of them

Aerith - What about me?

OORampant - Angels are good because of convention, very rarely do I see one doing good deeds besides offing demons.
Crystalforged

11-11-06, 04:14 AM		Well of course there are decent human beings out there but those are "person"s, on the other hand people, to quote MIB, are dumb, panicky, dangerous animals and you know it. Even a realy goodly individual isn't perfect since the mortal being is at its core a flawed creature and no one can ever fully rise above those flaws. There will always be war. There will always be strife. There will always be hatred. Its the way the world works. It sucks. Get used to it.



I'm rather cynical ain't I? :P
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-11-06, 09:02 AM		Caralot: I don't know Kanatash. I just don't know.
Caralot: Partially because on my world there are fundamentally good people. Or, at least, they aren't fundamentally trying to be jerks. The jerks just get that way.

Kanatash: So what does all that mean for Kitten?

Caralot: It's encoded in my genes………well, no, it's encoded into the base energy of my matter.

Kanatash: :mymy: So she's half-goody-two-shoes!

Caralot: No, no, she's half "generally make choices not trying to hurt others"/half "kill random things without asking questions". Her half her body is telling her she can make her own choices, the other half is telling her to go out an kill something for no reason. Even you don't do that.

Kanatash: So what do we do? How do we show her the truth about people?

Caralot: There is no "truth". But we can show her that she should leave people to be as they are and not expect things of them.

Kanatash: And how do we do that—oh, I know!

Caralot: We send her to visit my parents.

Kanatash: Not that that's a bad idea, but I wasn't thinking of that.

Caralot: :bored:

FX demon: *whup-pish!*
OOC:
Well of course there are decent human beings out there but those are "person"s, on the other hand people, to quote MIB, are dumb, panicky, dangerous animals and you know it. Even a realy goodly individual isn't perfect since the mortal being is at its core a flawed creature and no one can ever fully rise above those flaws. There will always be war. There will always be strife. There will always be hatred. Its the way the world works. It sucks. Get used to it.

I'm rather cynical ain't I?
I don't think it's all that cynical: I think it's a good mantra for reminding everyone that to allow free will you have to let people just act how they feel, and when they don't act like you expect you can lecture them but not berate them for not "being" a certain way. Believe me, I know, I've been guilty of this on numerous occasions.
Crystalforged

11-11-06, 01:31 PM		Hm, having her visit Caralot's parents isn't a bad idea, it just that I have "plans" for what will happen to while she's out on her own. I was just too lazy to type it all last night. Why don't we just assume its going to take a little while for them to find her?
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-11-06, 01:50 PM		Hm, having her visit Caralot's parents isn't a bad idea, it just that I have "plans" for what will happen to while she's out on her own. I was just too lazy to type it all last night. Why don't we just assume its going to take a little while for them to find her?
OOC: Only so long as I get to do some things as well. :D
Crystalforged

11-11-06, 02:12 PM		Well, just so you know I plan to crush the innocence and idealism out of her but I welcome any help. :D
urial angel of death

11-11-06, 02:21 PM		Terra and Lisa are currently in an exhausted heap wearing what appears to be the remains of a pair of Valkyrie outfits.

Terra: There are times your stamina amazes even me...

Lisa: Only an hour to recover? Seems I need to try harder. :devil:

Terra: :cloud9:


OOUrial: Ewww!

OOKaizer: What? I mean what more than normal.

OOUrial: The valkyries are all sisters.

OOKaizer: :mymy:
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-11-06, 03:49 PM		OOUrial: The valkyries are all sisters.

OOKaizer: :mymy:
Silver: :confused: Why is everyone looking at me? I just get them together, what they wear is up to them.

Bunny: :D Excuse me, have to go give Ketler a bloody nose. :devil:
Kaizer_Ryu

11-11-06, 03:53 PM		OOUrial: Ewww!

OOKaizer: What? I mean what more than normal.

OOUrial: The valkyries are all sisters.

OOKaizer: :mymy:
OOC: :mymy:? More like :evillaugh. :P

IC:

OOKaizer: And your point?

OOUrial: It's icky!

OOKaizer: This coming from a guy who's character is the equivalent of a 14 year old and is banging the equivalent of a 20 year old who was formerly three separate beings. Not to mention they just had five children in their first go.

OOUrial: Still-!

OOKaizer: So the lesbian tentacle sex at every opportunity between Lisa and Terra, the unanswered question of how in the 12 moons Serene got Satnak pregnant, Marish having four children by four different fathers at the same time, a Tibbit and a Half-Dragon cat going at it, Lilly lusting after what should be his nine year old cousins but somehow are not, Ketler in his myriad forms of pervert, the subliminal pseudo-flirting between Sarah and Tirmek, and the semi-relationship between Elina and Ivy (who is Soulbound in Stupid's body) are all ok, but the slight taboo implied by a roleplaying sex game makes you uncomfortable?

OOUrial: ...quiet you. :mad:
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-11-06, 04:06 PM		OOKaizer: …the subliminal pseudo-flirting between Sarah and Tirmek…
Silver: :devil:

OOKaizer: AAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!

13 (pulling off disguise): Fooled you! :D
…but the slight taboo implied by a roleplaying sex game…
OOcat: I think the original Valkyries are all daughters of Odin. :teach:

OOKaizer: Not contributing.

OOcat: :mad:
rampant

11-11-06, 05:00 PM		No that doesn't sound right, Odin's children were gods, and the Valkryies ranked below gods. I may be wrong but something's off here. (of course this is approaching from the angle of norse mythology if you're still talking about the game then ignore this)

OORampant - As to Serene + Satnak = Baby, think about who Serene's pop is.

Terrek - You won't get me to reveal my secrets.

Caralot - Awwwww

Silver - I already know them :P
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-11-06, 08:17 PM		No that doesn't sound right, Odin's children were gods, and the Valkryies ranked below gods. I may be wrong but something's off here.
OOC: Just looked it up on Wikipedia. There is no mention of valkyries being related to Odin.

*WHAM!*

Exacting-Standards-OOcat: Too lazy *WHAM!* to look up a fact. Too lazy *WHAM!* to write Caralot's parents coming over for a visit. Too lazy *WHAM!*to come up with longer and more interesting posts. Too lazy *WHAM!* to do *WHAM!* anything!

Bunny: Hey, lay off! :mad:

Silver: Yeah, you're not needed! :rant:

13: We're the only ones allowed to toture the E.B.N.E. :P

Commentary Crew: We've got you beat!

Exacting-Standards-OOcat: And how do you figure that? I control the OOcat. :emp:

FX demon: *start catchy eletronic music*

Music: GO-GO COMMENNNNNNTARYYYYYYYYYYY!
*dunnnnn daaaaaa dunnnnnnnn dundun*
Silver: :elf:
GO-GO COMMENNNNNNTARYYYYYYYYYYY!
Bunny: :fight!:
*dunnnnn daaaaaa dunnnnnnnn dundun*
13: :mage:
GO-GO COMMENTARYYYYYYYYY, REAL-LY FUN-NY COM-MEN-TARYYYYYYYYYYYY!

Exacting-Standards-OOcat: :surrender
rampant

11-11-06, 10:03 PM		OORampant - I've had IT! *OOCatdoken*

OOCat(s) - Ripoooooooooooooooooooooooof *blink*

Commentary Crew - Team rockets' blasting off agaaaaaaaiiiiiin *blink*
-----------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Why are you here?

Kerrith - To make sure you don't try to pull anything on the ladies.

Sarah - Eeeeeeeew :yuck:

Elina - Gag me with a spoon.

Tirmek - *call heavy book +2**thump**thwack**thud*

Kerrith - OwOuchahhhhg
rampant

11-12-06, 02:06 AM		Satnak - Geh I feel awful :yuck

Serene - It's called pregnancy, Silly girl:)

Satnak - The worst part is the boredom.

Serene - I know hun, but I severly doubt that summoning up a few astral constructs, and slugging it out with them would be good for the baby.

Satnak - I don't see why I can't atleast get a chess game going.

Serene - You never ask anyone who has no chance of winning.

Satnak - whats the point of playing someone who can't possibly win?

Serene - They're afraid they might beat you.

Satnak - I've never hurt anyone for being a better player, being an ass about it maybe. No one worries about offending a decent chess player.

Serene - Because decent chess players don't rip peoples' arms off when they loose. Pregnant women are known to do that.
cypher_zero

11-12-06, 03:33 AM		Terrek stands next to what appears to be an exceptionally large chess board. Standing on the board in lines are several redshirts lined up, dressed as chess pieces and carrying various weapons... and looking scared out of their wits.

Terrek: There we go. That should just about do it. Now... to find someone to play with...
.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-12-06, 03:53 AM		Serene - Because decent chess players don't rip peoples' arms off when they loose. Pregnant women are known to do that.
OOC: I'm of the opinion that it should be 'pregnant women are ALLOWED to do that'. Considering what they have to put up with during the process, women should be granted a quota for the duration of the pregnancy of people they are allowed to murder in painful ways for making things more difficult than they already are. This privilage can be extended to the husband/boyfriend/significant other/etc. at her behest should she be unable to perform said mutilation of the offending idiot herself. Clean out the Gene pool and make the mother-to-be's life easier. What more could you want?

In case you haven't figured it out, I'm kidding. Well, kind of at least. Killing may be too much, but they deserve at least a tazer. ;)

IC:

Satnak: Check mate.

Terra: Dammit...

Satnak: You're sure you're not letting me win?

Terra: :shifty: Uh...no...of course not...

Satnak: :mad:

Terra: I'm kidding! I just made a bad move.

Lisa: *playing against Serene* Make that several, hon. You're too used to playing against the girls.

Serene: Can't help but go easy on them, huh?

Terra: More like I didn't have to watch my every step so closely. I could make a mistake here and there just to see if they'd pick up on it. Most of the time they did, but rarely capitalized on it. I do that here and I'm paste.

Satnak: :D I can't help it. Going for the kill is what I do.

Lisa: It'll be interesting to see how your natural competitiveness and your maternal instincts interact.

Satnak: *sigh* I wonder if I'll even have maternal instincts...

Serene: Of course you will, Silly girl. You'll do fine, I know it.

Satnak: :embarrass :D
Chrys

11-12-06, 09:43 AM		D’Ducky: ok now that we have written the letter we just need to get some one to give it to her, find some bosses for her to fight… and Hide you some place.

Rose: I still don’t know about this…

D’Ducky: Hey the last time I check you were not on the whipped list so shut up! Any way this plan is chaotically perfect what could possibly go wrong!

13: I’ll deliver the letter. :angelhide

D’Ducky: Here you go, remember give to the woman that is romantically involved with Rose.

13: Right; All the women who were romantically involved with Rose at any time. :schemes:

D’Ducky: Right, works for me!

Rose: I’m so Boned
urial angel of death

11-12-06, 10:17 AM		Mickey: *finally coming back into his operating room* So what are you going to name them?

Volrath: Well I had some family names, but we'd prefer to name them based on personality once they grow up some more.

Aerith: *appearing* Oh they are so precious!

P/Y/R: Well then would yo like to babysit this one. *hold up a baby with a look of pure contempt* His name's Stewart.

Mickey: I thought you hadn't named them yet.

Volrath: Well we have learned enough about him that he can be named.

Aerith: Oh thank you. *pikcs up Stewart* We will have some much fun. Yes we will. *shower of kisses*

Stewart: *pointing at his father* You have the power to end this!

Aerith: Oh such cute little baby talk. *exits*

Volrath: Well thank the gods we got him out of here.

Mickey: Why? *downs a rum of cure light wounds*

P/Y/R: Well he's going to grow up to be an extremely power type of aberration, a haunting horror. He has to get experience killing, so we're giving a nigh unkillable target.

Mickey: *turns his bottle upside down in a vain attempt to get more rum* You people are wierd.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-12-06, 11:59 AM		OOC: A side note on Stewart: He always speaks with a British accent. This should clear up any doubts as to who he's patterened after. :D :devil:

IC:

Stewart: (i.h.h.) With this I shall be free! Free to begin my plans of world domination!

Stewart has somehow managed to fashion an energy pistol out of common household items (yet it looks completely professional).

Stewart: Say goodbye, vile woman.

*KRAZAP*

The beam arcs towards Aerith, but strikes the diamond ring on her finger, causing it to bounce relatively harmlessly into the wall. Aerith remains completely oblivious to this attempt on her life.

Stewart: :mad: Blast! *pulls out a tape recorder* Report failure number five. It seems the Deva is somehow immune to my attacks. I must find a means of nullifying this protection post haste or determine a more suitable target. *stops*

:shifty:

*quietly starts again* Nick nack paddy whack, give a dog a bone... *stops*
Crystalforged

11-12-06, 07:05 PM		An unknown rural area somewhere in Khorvair.

Kitten: (walking up to a farmhouse) Uh, hello? Is anyone home?

Grandmotherly Woman: (emerging from house) Well hello there deary. Oh ho ho, whats a cute little child like yourself doing on your own?

Kitten: I ran away from home, my parents just didn't understand things. I have traveled far and I was wondering if maybe I could stay here for the night?

Woman: Of course deary, come in. It's just me and my grandchildren here, we have more than enough room for you.

Kitten: I don't want to be a burden for you, I'd like to help out somehow.

Woman: Oh perish the thought deary, but if you insist why don't you help me prepare dinner here. (begins chopping vegtables)

Kitten: Okay, I don't know how much I can help though. I never did much cooking at hom.

Woman: If you don't mind me asking deary, where do you come from anyways?

Kitten: Oh, I was born on the Forgotten Freedom-

Woman: (eyes going wide) The- (stabs Kitten in the arm with the vegtable knife) Run children! It's from the Forgotten Freedom! (flees from the room)

Kitten: (tear welling in her eyes) But- Why? I don't understand. Why did she do that? (reaches over and pulls out the knife, there is no noticable wound left behind) Why do they hate me? Are they judging me just because of where I was born? :weep:
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-12-06, 07:42 PM		Woman: …Run children!…
A few miles away there is the sound of a random monster ripping through an old woman and her grandchildren.

13: Say, why are you doing this?

Bunny: Because it makes me feel better. Plus it's what I do.
urial angel of death

11-12-06, 07:43 PM		Kanatash meets Volrath outside the delivery room.

Kanatash: Nephew I've been thinking about something. Do your Tyranids emit the standard psionic beacon.

Volrath: I didn't get change the design so I guess so.

Kanatash: Won't that lead the main hive fleet hear.

Volrath: I guess so, but the Hive-Mind seems cool about being exiled from the daelkyr. If we tell him not to I think he'll steer clear.

Kanatash: Think about what comes after Tyranid contact with a world.

Volrath: Well there's usually an invasion and then Space Marin- :eek:

Kanatash: Exactly.
rampant

11-12-06, 07:55 PM		Satnak - Awwwww Dammit:mad:

Serene - What's wrong?

Satnak - I'm gonna miss out on a serious butt-kicking *hmph*

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - How much longer?

Sarah - (Wearing Headset watching several monitors with different views of Kitten and her surrounding area.) Dunno

Elina - (holding a clipboard with several sheets of data and Kitten's current profile) It could be a while before the situation resolves itself.

Sarah - The squirrels are keeping an eye on her, if anything serious comes up they can be on the scene before you can twitch your tail.

Tirmek - If i had one:mad:

Elina & Sarah - Tail envy
Kaizer_Ryu

11-12-06, 09:48 PM		Mean while, on Evil Island...

Jarlot: So, Ketler. What's this big thing you've supposedly made. I certainly hope it's better than those Stick-em's you made that were actually Post-it(tm) notes.

Ketler: :mad: It was brilliant, I tell you!

Jarlot: *sigh* Ketler...son...you even wrote your idea about Stick-em's on Post-it(tm) notes...

Ketler: Are you fo' rizzle?

Jarlot: Yes, and I told you to stop that. Now tell me what you made already.

Ketler pulls a sheet away to reveal a strange device.

Ketler: Ta-da! It's a Finite Improbability Drive!

Jarlot: ...and?

Ketler: It works like the chaos magic of the Forgotten Freedom, but it should be somewhat more predictable. See, all I have to do is calculate just how improbable an event is, plug that into the machine, and presto! The event happens.

Jarlot: It's that simple?

Ketler: In theory.

Jarlot: Why does that phrase never reassure me?

Ketler: What should we try first?

Michael: OOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I have an idea! I remember reading it in a book once.

Jarlot: *raised eyebrow* Reading? You?

Michael: ...ok, fine. I saw a movie based on the book.

Ketler: And?

Michael: :plotting:

-----

*Within the Forgotten Freedom*

Every Female Crewmember Of Age: :eek:

From their respective positions, each's undergarments have jumped one foot to the side.

-----

At a pool of scying:

Michael: :evillaugh That worked better than I expected! Black lace on Lisa. :drool: White on little miss hot-as-sin Bard. Andrea...blood red, matches her hair. :smirk: Terra-:eek: :drool:

Ketler: What? I don't see anything.

Michael: Exactly. She's been very naughty.

At this moment, the combined rage of the women comes crashing through the image and sends Michael into the pool of sharks with frikin' lazer beams attached to their heads.

Michael: :D Worth it! :D

-----

Terra: Should I wonder why you said anything?

Kithle: Nope. Just being my typical self.

Terra: :rolleyes: I know you enjoy what you do, but did you really have to 'pimp' your Plaque?

Kithle: Yes. :D

The letters of the Plaque are now illuminated in such a way that they leave the little blank spot on your field of vision almost instantly.

OOC: Anyone want to do more with the Finite Improbability Drive? Aside from making the Infinite Improbability Drive, of course. There was a rule about that somewhere, I'm sure.
rampant

11-12-06, 09:56 PM		Liam - I call LAWSUIT!!

Reman - Here!

Liam - Any and all devices powered by the wiersan of the FF are covered under my rights to the weirsan converter.
------------------------------------------------------------

Micheal (still dripping and bleeding) - So totally worth it. :D and the best part is Satnak can't castrate me for it!!

Ketler - I'll tell Mickey to start brewing a potion of regeneration.

Micheal - Why?

At that moment an astral construct, with way to many pointy things growing out of it, approaches Micheal from behind and ---ZZznidnbzzzst---

This scene was deemed too violent and indecent for network T.V. thank you for your patience. Please enjoy this relaxing image of puppies playing fetch.

as the puppies run and tumble about Micheals screams can still be heard above the yipping.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-12-06, 10:34 PM		*Within the Forgotten Freedom*

Every Female Crewmember Of Age: :eek:

From their respective positions, each's undergarments have jumped one foot to the side.
Later, at Erk's Place:

Mendova: He did WHAT?! :eek:

Lisa: I'm assuming that was a retorical outburst?

Terra: :mad: Do you suppose Kithle contracts for special revenges?

NJ26: You could always ask 13.

Terra: Ah, eliminate the middle-man.

Serene: So what was it like here? It had to be pure chaos with all the scantily clad heroines you get!

*shot of all the scantly clad female superheroes in Erk's Place*

Lucky: Oh, perfectly fine. Word Being protected the entirety of the underdecks.

Erk (said in a completely refined accent): Probability is my b*tch.
**********
OOC: Anyone want to do more with the Finite Improbability Drive? Aside from making the Infinite Improbability Drive, of course. There was a rule about that somewhere, I'm sure.
13: What don't we want to do with it? :bored:
rampant

11-12-06, 11:34 PM		Satnak - Oh bloody mol I feel like a blimp!

Serene - Sorry to say it but you look like a blimp.:P

Terra - ({private line to lisa} I think she might be the only one in existance who could actually respond to that without getting killed)

Lisa - (no sudden movements, move towards the door *anime sweat drop*)
cypher_zero

11-12-06, 11:43 PM		Terra: Do you suppose Kithle contracts for special revenges?
Terrek: No... but I do. :devil:
.
rampant

11-12-06, 11:52 PM		Kithle - Down!! this one is mine metal-head, don't make me go jack and daxter on yo' butt.

Terra - Now I'm nervous.

Kithle - Now let me see ah-ha I have just the thing :evillaugh
----------------------------------------

Micheal - (in squeaky voice) what do you mean 3 months!

Mickey - Some of the re-agents needed for the regen potion you need are rare, and my current stock has dissapeared with only acorns in its place.

Micheal - What am I gonna do for three months as a eunuch!

Mickey - The choir needs another alto.
----------------------------------------

Terrek - That was too easy.

Kithle - Wait'll they get the bill.

Terrek - They?

Kithle - They both get the bill, but their noteshave been switched. I make double pay, and Micheal knows who's behind it.

Terrek - You?

Kithle - Terra

Terrek - O like the part where you're making a guy pay for someone else taking out a contract against him.

Kithle - That's my favorite part aswell.
----------------------------------------------

Micheal - (Reading note) ...damn there goes my money for soap...Oh its on now Terra.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-13-06, 12:10 AM		Micheal - (Reading note) ...damn there goes my money for soap...Oh its on now Terra.
Terra: *appearing behind him* Must we do this again?

Michael: :eek:

Terra: Magnificent Bastardry has one, and only one rule: Everyone is a target. When I got the wrong note, I knew what Kithle was up to.

Michael: *still squeaky voice* But this goes too far!

Terra: Seems you don't know exactly how far you went with that little stunt. But aside from that: Can we call it even if I don't tell your mother that it was you who caused that to happen to her in front of my daughters?

Michael: :mymy: It happened to Mom, too? Oh, thank Grandma I didn't see that.

Terra: She likes pink far too much.

Michael: :eek: *covering his ears* LA LA LA LA!!! I can't hear you!!!

Terra: :devil: (telepathically) Could I show you, then?

Michael: NO!! We're even, WE'RE EVEN!!!! FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS UNHOLY DON'T SHOW ME THAT!

Terra: :evillaugh *ports out*

-----

Kithle: :mad: You're no fun.

Terra: :P That was actually a suggestion from the only bastard more Magnificent than you. But e doesn't exist, so e can't have the Plaque.

13: First rule: I rule. :evillaugh
rampant

11-13-06, 12:42 AM		Tirmek (he has a black eye but it's kind of hard to tell, except for the swelling) - Well that could have gone better.

Elina - Yeah being trampled by a blue hydra can't be as fun as it looked.

Sara - Shut up the both of you!:mad:

Elina - You're just ****** about the wall.

Sarah - 200 freaking times with extra weight!

Tirmek - I hate finals.

Sarah - And the Sub for aunt Satnak's class what a jerk!

Elina - Tell me she's having the kid soon. Yeah the guy is easier on the reps, but the spiked pits are just sadistic!

Tirmek - Then its a good thing the test proctor used Aunt Satnak's notes.

Sarah - Oh don't get too smug I saw you sweating bolts when you were in the pits.

Tirmek - I can't help it they look like giant crossbow bolts.
Gladius_Lucix

11-13-06, 11:41 AM		Liam - I call LAWSUIT!!

Reman - Here!

Liam - Any and all devices powered by the wiersan of the FF are covered under my rights to the weirsan converter.

Liam: Not only that, but I've already invented it. The Weirsan Probablility Drive. Runs off my Cascade Engine. Haven't gotten to play with it much because I had to go work on the new Weirsan Convertors for the Island. Swarm, if you can manage it, get Kithle, Terrek, and 13 together. I want something worse than a simple patent infringment lawsuit. I want something MUCH worse.

Swarm: Right away, sir!

Liam: First off... Computer, calculate the probability that the regeneration potion won't work on Michael and execute.

Bracer: (In the standard sexy female computer voice) Working. Probability Calculated. Executing. Possibility is in place.
Chrys

11-13-06, 12:17 PM		Rose: Are you sure this is going to work? I mean I’m just wearing a pair of glass.

D’Ducky: Of course It worked for Clark Kent.

Rose: Who?

D’Ducky: See what I mean.

OoChrys: I hate Superman for that very reason! Moving on someone else can write Zella and any else re-actions to the letter.
rampant

11-13-06, 02:40 PM		Terrek - Let's see, grand theft Intellectual property, abuse of said intellectual property

Kithle - we can work that into slander

Terrek - Also a second suit For sexual harrasment in the work place

13 - You know we could add on a charge of piracy.

Kithle - Oh that does tickle the funny bone.

Terrek - That's just mean...I'm penciling it in right now.

....

Kithle - Whats up?

Terrek - I sense a disturbance in the Force.
------------------------------------------------------------------

Satnak - Well crap!... I liked those shoes.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-13-06, 03:44 PM		Satnak - Well crap!... I liked those shoes.
A few moments earlier:

Silver: All right! Let's get this party started! :monk:

OOC: I hope I'm right.
rampant

11-13-06, 05:10 PM		RaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaH
-------------------------------------
Kol Korn - Jeebus! My ears! they bleed!
---------------------------------------------
Kithle - Find your happy place, find your happy place
--------------------------------------------------
Terra (wearing very large earmuffs) - Ok I think I'm gonna need more pain Killers.

Satnak - YAH THINK!!!

Serene - Breathe hun, breathe (good thing daddy got her a pair of squeeze balls for this...she just crystallized them)
-------------------------------------------------------------
Lhaazar principalities

Merchant - *twitches feebly*

Deaf man - Whats wrong with everyone?

Merchant - lucky bastard
urial angel of death

11-13-06, 05:42 PM		All over eberron every psionic creature feels a sudden shock. Telepaths find that they cannot communicate more than a few miles through their minds, kinetists powers come with pain as if the powers are draining from their vitality, nomads find planar travel impossible, and wilders no long feel their surges of energy. Eberron a revatively young planet had no idea what these occurences were a sign of and thus took no notice. Though in truth even if they had known very little could actually be done to prefare even in the most adavanced civilizations. The Shadow had descended.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

11-13-06, 06:39 PM		Ash was in the bar when the shadow fell, sipping at a mug of alchemists fire as he floated in the lotus position by a table. For a moment he simply frowned as the throbing of his fiery madness dimbed, then he fell, the mental arts taht let him scorn the earth abandoning him, and for the first time since he began to call himself Ash he felt fear.

In his meorys, the scene was vivid as the taste of soot and blood. Pazuzu, the deamon prince of air, the black stain upon syriana, filled the sky before him. His was the name never to be spoken, he was the one who had cursed the raven Born to walk the land. and before him Ratock was a broken thing, bound to anothers will.
Pazuzu "you are arogant, little bird, to dare call me, what makes you thik you will survive?

Ra-Tok "What is death to a slave? The Quori have me, if you wish my soul I do not have it Lord Pazuzu, and so what have I to luse?"

Pazuzu "How dare they, your race, egg and elder are my playthings little murderer. Till the day your soul I consume"

Ra-Tok "This I know my lord, my sky. My soul is yours if you grant my boon, free me, break the chains upon my mind, clim my soul the next my feet touch the earth, but do so to a free spirit, not a slave"

Pazuzu "The next time your feetdo touch the earth it is then little raven. by sin and sky and the tears of angels do I free you from all that would confine your will" and with those words he dammed him, and Ra-Tok burned, and all the city in wich he stood, free of the donds laid by his teacher, free of concence, free of mery, pitty or remorce, lost in lust for the flame. To this thing that filled Ra-Toks soul there was but onething to sweaten it, and so before pazuzu left it caught his eye, and steped forwatds, from his perch, onto the bare earthen soil... and scorned the earth, his talloned feet no closer to the cround than might a mans boot tops be.
Few indeed have heard the roar of a deamon prince cheated, it boyed him, to this new soul baptised in flames Pazuzu's scream was his birth pangs, and he lauhed to mock him.

Ash whispers gravely "and now, I scorn the earth no more..."
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-13-06, 06:53 PM		Ash whispers gravely "and now, I scorn the earth no more..."
Erk: If anything bad is going to happen, remember to take it outside.

Ash: Hey, thanks for the sympathy. :mad:

Erk: I decided long ago that if E.B.N.E.s are going to do all these dramatic backgrounds that my bar wasn't going to be a part of it. This is a place to kick back and forget your troubles from an outside world. You can have my sympathy outside the decks that I protect.

Ash: That brings up a very good question: Why am I the only one here being affected by this?

Erk: Because your E.B.N.E. has control over you, but not anyone who isn't their character.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-13-06, 07:01 PM		RaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaH
Caralot and Kanatash sits perfectly calm, drinking tea in a shop on the underdecks.

Kanatash: I must say, it's nice to have a wife who stays in contact with the lesser-known elements of this demiplane of a ship.

Caralot: :whatsthis

Kanatash: Of course, the rest of the crew is going to kill me for not sharing.
Terra (wearing very large earmuffs) - Ok I think I'm gonna need more pain Killers.

Satnak - YAH THINK!!!

Serene - Breathe hun, breathe (good thing daddy got her a pair of squeeze balls for this...she just crystallized them)
Unseen, Silver is doing a riverdance upon Satnak's abdomen using iron boots.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

11-13-06, 07:04 PM		Ver d'Gris "Captain Random?" shakes Chanse "Snap out of it, come on..."

Jack o'Bite "Whats the matter?"

Ver "I dont know, we were talking when all of a sudden he muttered 'Ash is getting burned' and started laughing, I dont know whats happening"
rampant

11-13-06, 08:16 PM		Satnak - RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Terre - (asume telepathy, for anyone but Satnak, from this point on due to the screaming) It's crowning!

Lisa - Can't you cast a silence spell?

Serene - I already tried that! she's distorting the energy flow around her, I can only deaden the sound no cancel it out.

Terra - Here it comes!

Serene - Good, we're out of squishy balls! She just powdered the last one.

Lisa - I didn't know it was posibble to crush those things.

Terra - Blankets, rag, a change of sheets, and a very big knife. If the umbilical is as tough as the rest of the mother...

Satnak - RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
rampant

11-13-06, 09:16 PM		Baby - Waaaaaaaaah

Satnak - huff wheeze zzz

Serene - Come here you Precious child. My dear son.

Terra - (pulls off earmuffs) What are you girls gonna name him?

Serene - Dorvos after Satnak's father.

Lisa - What if it had been a girl?

Serene - Dorvys, her family doesn't have gender specific names, the last vowel sound denotes gender. I'm not quite clear on the exact rules. God's he's beautiful.

Lisa - Sleep Now Satnak, if he's like his....

Serene - Mommy, thats right Dorvos, I'm your mommy. Wave at your Mother Dorvos.

Dorvos - Gah:confused:
Kaizer_Ryu

11-13-06, 09:45 PM		Elina: Are we alive?

Sarah: Seems that way.

Tirmek: Though the ringing in my ears is unlikely to stop anytime soon.

Sarah: Wait, where's Kerrith?

Tirmek: Over there.

Kerrith is currently on the ground, frothing at the mouth as blood leaks from his ears.

Elina: Yikes...

Tirmek: Apparently, Nalfein hasn't explained to him he can purposely fail his listen check. Though the scroll of Silence didn't hurt.

Elina: With how loud Aunt Satnak can be when she's just teaching, I figured this warrented some backup.

Sarah: But doesn't this mean you've got a cousin now?

Tirmek: I suppose it does. I wonder how mother feels about becoming an aunt.

Sarah: Can we go see? :bigeyes:

Tirmek: We'll give them time to rest first. Your parents and Aunt Serene were at ground zero, and Aunt Satnak has to be exhausted.

Sarah: Awwwww.... :raincloud

Elina: :rolleyes: *sigh* What is it with you?

Sarah: :mad: I can't help it! They're so cute!
Charles Phipps

11-13-06, 09:45 PM		Rose: Hey Jarlot!

Jarlot: MY WIFE IS ALIVE!

Rose: What?!

Jarlot: So is yours!

Rose: WHAT!?

Red Ketler: AN INVASION OF COMMUNISTS FROM DIMENSION-SOVIET!

Rose: Why wife is alive!?
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-13-06, 09:54 PM		Serene - Mommy, thats right Dorvos, I'm your mommy. Wave at your Mother Dorvos.

Dorvos - Gah:confused:
13: I'm predicting a lot of fun with this kid.
********
Stewie: You there, dog!

Quench (passing by on two legs, holding a martini): Who, me?

Stewie: Can you free me from this hellish prison?

Quench: You mean your crib?

OOC: I can't do Family Guy comedy, so feel free to make use of this.
rampant

11-14-06, 12:23 AM		Fluffy - No he means the 6by6 room with the bars, of course he means the crip you stupid mutt.

Quench - This is the reason I drink, he's called fluffy, or as i call him Ugly's older less pleasant brother.

Fluffy - watch you gonna do about it from down there?:P

Stewie - (i.h.h. this should be a jolly good show)

Quench - Die you scaly mop with wings! *throws martini glass*

Fluffy - *Firebreath*

The martini its blasted back scatterd into shrapnel, and increasing the area of the flames.

Quench - EEP *dodge*

Slaypaw - Dammit Fluffy Not again! How many times must I say it NO DOG MEAT. Now Go get the kits, we're off to see your little brother.
--------------------------------

Tirmek - (with fluffy standing on his head) When did I become a Cat roost?

Rip - meow (what is it?)

Tear - Meow ( mom said its our cousin )

Shred - mew (Its got no fur though)

Mittens - merrrr ( must catch flicking thing )

Rip - mewol?! ( it has a ... very flicky ... tail... yah come here you!)

Slaypaw - Kits -

Satnak - Let them play, baby or not he's already got teeth.

Shred - *looks in Dorvos's mouth* Merer ( no he doesn't? )

Serene - Not there

Mittens and Rip - MEOWRRR ( OOOOWWWWWWWWWWW )

Terrek - His tail apperently has fang-like barbs.

Sarah - (nursing several small cuts) Now you tell me!

Ketty - What I don't understand is the eyes. 2 Green ones like his mom's, but the marks around his upper torso look like eyes, 10 right there, then there's this mark on his forehead looks like a closed eye.

Serene - Oh thats from my side.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-14-06, 01:04 AM		Serene: Where's Elina? Didn't she want to see?

Terrek: The girl refuses to come within 500 feet of me.

Serene: Did she say why?

Tirmek: She didn't really have to say anything for us to find out why. The vomiting was quite enough to get the point across.

Serene: Oh, dear! Is she sick?!

Sarah: No, she'll be fine. It's just that, no offense, but she says your daddy sounds like a...ummmmm...

Tirmek: Walking torture chamber of the damned.

Sarah: :embarrass Yeah, I think that's how she put it.

Terrek: Apparently Souleaters bother her.

Satnak: That would make sense with what she sees and hears.

Dorvos: *giggling drivel*

Rip: Mrr (...must get tail...!)

Mittens: *gigantic bugeyes*

Tear: Rrrr (flicky thing will be mine!)

Shred: MROW!!! (IT FREAKING BIT ME!)

-----

Stewart: Why you miserable flea-ridden mutt! Release me from this ghastly prison at once or face the consequences!

Quench: Oh, yeah. What are you gonna do, bore me to death? :P

Stewart: *pulls out a hammergun*

Quench: :eek:

P/Y/R: *grabs the gun* Now, Stewart, you can play with your toys later.

Stewart: :mad: Now see here, woman!

P/Y/R: Now, now. It's nap time. Would you like Mommy to read you a story? *pulls out Call of :coolcthul *

Stewart: Not that watered down trash written by the hippie estranged son of the Lord of Madness! I want the real thing, you harpy!

P/Y/R: :cloud9: *begins reading*

Quench merely shakes his head and walks away.

Quench: Now if I can only find a decent Liquor in this place. Maybe some Chardonnay. Anything overly pretentious would work, though.
rampant

11-14-06, 01:49 AM		later

Elina - He's cute alright.

Sarah - (bandaging the cuts from earlier) Watch the tail.

Satnak - Give him a few days and the teeth will be on both ends:D

Terra - Wait one moment, days?

Elina - Well this is the second time I've heard a soul sing.

Lisa - Him too?

Elina - Sort of, it's not like Aerith. Her song is a celestial choir. This one is constantly changing, mostly random notes.

Serene - He's a baby.

Elina - That explains the lack of stucture, to the music.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-14-06, 08:19 AM		Bunny: Hmmmm, spikes on tail, this could still work……… :shifty:

Silver: Okay, 13, balls now in your court.

13 (Mr. Burns voice): Eeeeeeeeexxcellent. :emp:

Silver: Me, I've gotta take a trip for the next one.

OOcat: You're commentary: you don't necessarily go anywhere.

Silver: That was an allusion. :rolleyes:

OOcat: But I haven't explained the circumstances surrounding it, so no one will get it.

Silver: It's not my fault you're lazy. :P

OOcat: This has nothing to do with being lazy! We just haven't gotten to that part yet!

13: Detecting maternal insinct.

Bunny puts on earmuffs.

Saberiel: Eeeeeee, so cute! :D
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

11-15-06, 02:59 PM		Erk: If anything bad is going to happen, remember to take it outside.

Ash: Hey, thanks for the sympathy. :mad:

Erk: I decided long ago that if E.B.N.E.s are going to do all these dramatic backgrounds that my bar wasn't going to be a part of it. This is a place to kick back and forget your troubles from an outside world. You can have my sympathy outside the decks that I protect.

Ash: That brings up a very good question: Why am I the only one here being affected by this?

Erk: Because your E.B.N.E. has control over you, but not anyone who isn't their character.

OOC: Am I to take it my atempts at adding pathos to my charicters fails to meet your aproval Silver :(
rampant

11-15-06, 04:54 PM		OOC: That's not his problem, he just had the floor waxed so he doesn't want fire melting it.
------------------------------------------------------

Dorvos - Goo

Rashour - Gah
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-15-06, 05:15 PM		OOC: Am I to take it my atempts at adding pathos to my charicters fails to meet your aproval Silver :(
OOC: Nah, nothing's wrong with it. I just like my comedy, and I love when it's sprung on people at dramatic moments. What you did was actually quite good. I just took the opportunity to explain that my intention for the bar is to be the calm eye of eternal comedy when everything around it is going dramatic.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-15-06, 08:50 PM		OOKaizer: Ok, girls. I have something important to tell you.

Sarah: This can't be good.

Elina: What is it this time?

OOKaizer: With the obvious time acceleration, I felt a pronouncement was in order.

Sarah: :rolleyes: He's going to be overly dramatic again.

Dramadar: Watch it, punk.

OOKaizer: Not today, pal! *HA-DO-KEN*

Dramadar is turned into a smoking crater for the seventh time today.

OOKaizer: I hereby declare; you two are TEN!

Elina: :mad: WTF?!

OOKaizer: Language, young lady.

Sarah: :weep: We don't even get a party or anything?!

OOKaizer: Oh, you did. It was just off screen. But it was quite over the top, I assure you.

*timeline adjustment Plot Device*

Sarah: Oh yeah... Too bad Lilly had to go and make all those crude comments.

Elina: Though the beating was fun.

Sarah: And Ketler gave us those plug suits.

Elina: Then tried to get us to pilot his Gundam.

Sarah: Warforged Titan.

Elina: :shifty: Oh, right. Silver's excited mumbling made me a bit nervous, though.

OOKaizer: Ignore her. She's just waiting for you two to become legal.

Silver: I have eight years to lay the groundwork for a whole lot of fun. :plotting: :devil:

Elina & Sarah: :mymy:

OOKaizer: :fight!:

Silver: :cool: Chill. It's still your call as to what happens and when.

OOKaizer: And only so long as it's ok with their parents. They're scary... :hides:
rampant

11-15-06, 09:31 PM		Dorvos - :confused:

Rashour - :eek:

Aerith - They're so CUTE! *sloppy kissing, baby talk, and gratuitous peek-a-booing*

Satnak - zzz

Serene - How can she sleep through this?

Terra - Some of us get tired, having a baby includes tremendous physical and mental exertion, even for Satnak.

Lisa - Serene, your position is unique. You have an ability that most parents would give an arm for: You don't require sleep, and you never experience fatigue. On the other hand neither wil Dorvos most likely, You're gonna have a lot of time to spend with him, now Satnak won't. She has a job she will need to go back to eventually, she tires out, though not as quickly as others, in other words: Chances are she's not going to get as much time with Dorvos as she'd like.

Serene - I hadn't really thought about it from that perspective.

Terra - I doubt Satnak has either, you'll survive though.

Lisa - Satnak will be run ragged of course.

Serene - I'll just do my best to "relax" her then :schemes:
urial angel of death

11-15-06, 10:35 PM		Kanatash sat in his room completely exhausted and disheartened. Psionically communicating across void was stressful, so much so that it would fry the mind of a mortal, and Kanatash had been at it for several hours trying to convince this splinter fleet of Behemoth to alter its direction. Unfortunately his efforts had been in vain, for once they learned that Eberron contained a dealkyr presence the Tyranids hastened to meet up with their long lost bretheren. Even more worrisome (sp) was that this was not a splinter fleet looking for conquest and food. It was a retreating splinter fleet trying to regroup with the main bulk of Behemoth, and that could mean only one thing. The Imperium was hot on their tails...
rampant

11-15-06, 11:21 PM		Ketty - I want to help.

Kanatash - :eek:

Ketty - I know something's wrong you're on par with the best war psychics as far as that goes and something has you nervy.

Caralot - Shouldn't you worry more about getting your family out of the way?

Ketty - Satnak needs rest, Serene is no fighter, Dorvos is a baby. Terrek will see to their safety.

Kanatash - Your son?

Ketty - Is not about let Elina, Sithis, Sarah, or Maladren come to harm. I couldn't keep him away if I tried, safer to focus on making sure he survives the fight.
----------------------------

Izzy - I need to go to the bathroom again.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-15-06, 11:25 PM		Serene - I'll just do my best to "relax" her then :schemes:
Terra: :embarrass ANYway...we'd just like you to know. The two of us are here for anything you need. You may not physically tire, but everyone needs a break now and then. Between taking care of Dorvos and keeping Satnak from running herself into the ground, you may very well forget that you have needs too.

Lisa: ;) I had my work cut out for me with this one...

Terra: :D So I went a little overboard with the Mom stuff. Can you blame me?

Serene: We'll keep that in mind. I'm sure Satnak won't mind. After a while, of course.

Lisa: How long did it take before you put Elina down the first time?

Terra: ...

Serene: Oh, come on. It can't be that bad.

Terra: ...she made me put her down after five hours. :(
rampant

11-15-06, 11:48 PM		Silver: I have eight years to lay the groundwork for a whole lot of fun. :plotting: :devil:

13 - :evillaugh:

OOCat - What's his malfunction?

Bunny - Wait for it...

Silver - Huh?

Bunny - Wait for it...

13 - You know silver Elina, and Sarah are Half-elves.

Silver - Yeah, I know.

Bunny - wait for it...

13 - Doesn't that mean they don't "turn legal" till they're 22?:D

Bunny - And there it is

Silver - Hate you so much right now:mad:
-------------------------------------------------

OOC: I know 4 years isn't much to Silver, but the image was just too funny to pass up.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-16-06, 12:05 AM		OOC: I know 4 years isn't much to Silver, but the image was just too funny to pass up.OOC: Keep in mind that, even though Half-elves don't become adults till about 22, like any teenager, they'll become interested in 'certain things' much earlier. Thus, Silver's fun begins closer to 18-ish for them. Any sooner, and it's still too icky. And it doesn't have to be that. She's the goddess of fertility and all things related. This includes dating. Girls are scary enough. Imagine asking out one that can disembowel you in seventy different ways with a Q-tip while half asleep in three seconds flat. This is the kind of opportunity 13 dreams of. :D
cypher_zero

11-16-06, 12:09 AM		OOC: No wonder Satnak didn't date much. :P
.
rampant

11-16-06, 12:16 AM		OOC: Besides being a hopelessly shy romantic?

Tirmek - You know I don't think a Q-tip will overcome my Damage Reduction. A crossbow on the other hand

Ketty - He's got this wierd phobia of crossbows...

Maladren - Thats normal.

13 - Crossbows eh :schemes:

Bunny - Crossbows eh :plotting:

Silver - Crossbows eh :devil:

Everyone else steps away from silver.

Silver - What? :angelhide:
------------------------------------

Terra - She's not gonna put him down is she?

Lisa - Nope, and Serene can't pull the normal "he needs to rest card".

Terra - Oh sneaky girl, she's singing a lullaby. As drained as Satnak is now She doesn't stand a chance.

Lisa - Unless Little Dorvos learns a new trick.

Terra - I thought that was Satnak.

Lisa - Nope, Satnak's crystals don't bend or slide out of her skin.

Terra - Hmm...

Terrek - Its probably a result of Satnak's change and psionic lineage. The Living mithral in Serene, and I, is some sort of Mithral Crystal composite structure...That apperently resonates with Serene's singing.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-16-06, 08:42 AM		OOcat: Hmmm……………it seems that everyone is doing the commentary so well that I'm going to take a break. :D

Bunny: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Don't leave me here alone with Little Miss :cloud9: and Mister Hyper :devil:! I need to kill!

OOcat: :whatsthis

Maivy (oblivious to the presences near her): :weep: I'm never going to meet The Bunny.
********
Bunny: Decided to come back for more?

OOcat: Quite you. :mad:

Kitten is standing in front of a city gate somewhere in Khorvaire.

Bunny: Not only do you not say which city, but you'll never be able to pull this off. You just don't have the ability to be that mean. :bored:

Guard: Why, hello there, are you lost? (i.h.h. :sceam: )

Kitten: I am looking for examples of the basic goodness in people.

Guard: Why don't we go somewhere and explore our insides together. :devil:

Silver: Okay, that's it! *Secret Fertility Goddess Male Incapacitating Technique!*

Guard (voice several octaves higher): Ah, maybe someone else can help—*gurk!, collapse*

Kitten: (i.h.h. Thank goodness, his mind was scary.)

Bunny: So what are we now, her unnofficial guardians?

OOcat: Looks that way. OOCrystalforged can debase her of "goodness" all he wants, your just here to pick up the pieces. Once we get her to Caralot's parents they can put them back together in a new arrangement.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

11-16-06, 08:58 AM		Ketty - He's got this wierd phobia of crossbows...


13 - Crossbows eh :schemes:

Bunny - Crossbows eh :plotting:

Silver - Crossbows eh :devil:

Everyone else steps away from silver.

Silver - What? :angelhide:


OOC: Not wanting to cause truble... Ok, so thats exactly what I want :devil: But if any one wants to use Chanse Random poster child of Heavy crossbows in any way Im fine with it. :plotting:
Chrys

11-16-06, 11:03 AM		D’Ducky walks around the lower decks looking for a place to hide Rose, who seem not to be as willing to be kidnapped as he once was. As he walks the halls he sees a baby playing in the hall about to be attacked by a roving gang of Chipmunk infiltrators. Just as D’Ducky is about to help the baby the chipmunk halt in place and slow start to dissolve, D’Ducky blinks changes his field of vision so that he could see the G-Cube that seemed to be protecting her.

D’Ducky: Well tadpole that’s an odd way of defending your self… I don’t suppose you have name… Or can talk… I don’t know all that much about babies… my kind hatch from eggs.

Baby: Gooo! * The G-Cube jiggles in rhythm like it trying to translate for the baby*

D’Ducky: So your name is Ishtar and your… lets just say uncle was suppose to be watching you…but you ate him because he looked like baby food.

Ishtar: Goo. * the G-Cube nods *

D’Ducky: I guess I could help you find your mother… Or at lest we can find people to throw oozes at.

OoChrys: Ishtar is Volrath and P/Y/R’s baby, by the way.
rampant

11-16-06, 11:22 AM		Saberial - You know introducing Dorvos to Lady may have been a bad Idea.

Serene - Hmmm...

Satnak - Awww isn't he adorable! and a quick study:D

Lady is showing off her various forms while Dorvos attemps (with verying degrees of sucess, bug eyes yes, wings not so much) to mimic them with his crysthral.

Lady - Ok now try this one *morphs into a snow spider*

Dorvos - Gahehe-hic *shapes crysthral into 8 long legs and stops*

Saberial - Huh?

Satnak - Aww whats wrong Dorvos?

Serene -He just found the limit of his crysthral is all. Even with the compression we use to hold it all, we don't have an unlimited amount. He's using all or almost all of it to do the legs.

Lady - I win!

Dorvos - geh *starts climbing up the wall*

Satnak - Come back here you!
Charles Phipps

11-16-06, 05:51 PM		Rose: So....Achika....what have you been up to since you died?

Achika: I didn't die but I fell into a time tunnel. I would have landed directly here but instead I ended up starring in a series of softcore pornography vampire hunter novels.

Rose: :blink:

Achika: Yes, I starred in the Achika Blake vampire hunter novels.

Rose: How....HOW COULD YOU!?

Achika: What? You hate Vampires!

*sounds of sobbing from a certain Vampire onboard*

Rose: You had sex with a Lestat rip off!

Achika: I also had were-sex!

Rose: Oh please. EVERYONE has had weresex. It's not all that it's cracked up to be.

Terra: HEY!

Rose: Right, remember when you took me to that Black Furries moot over in the World of Darkness?

Terra: Ummm....yeah, I'm sorry about that.

Rose: Now, I'm all for statuesque Greek women. I do however require them to be in HUMAN form when I have sex with them.

Achika: In any case, you can't stay mad at me.

Rose: And why the Hell not?

Achika: I have Whiny Girlfriend powers! :bigeyes:

Rose: You are going to try and influence MY reactions? How do...

Achika: :bigeyes:

Rose:....OH HOW COULD I HAVE BEEN MAD!?

*Snuggle*

Terra: Oh brother.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-16-06, 06:00 PM		Achika: I have Whiny Girlfriend powers! :bigeyes:

Rose: You are going to try and influence MY reactions? How do...

Achika: :bigeyes:

Rose:....OH HOW COULD I HAVE BEEN MAD!?

*Snuggle*

Terra: Oh brother.
Silver (wearing a WWII helmet): War's dirty.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-16-06, 08:36 PM		Rose:....OH HOW COULD I HAVE BEEN MAD!?

*Snuggle*

Terra: Oh brother.
:heehee

IC:

Still on Evil Island:

Jarlot: Hey, Ketler. Where'd our Giant "so-totally-not-Godzilla" Lizard of Destruction go?

Ketler: ...ummmm...

Jarlot: *sternly* Ketler!

Ketler: It was his idea!

Michael: Liar! I just wanted to ride it! You wanted to set it loose on Sarlona!

*elsewhere*

Giant Lizard: RAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!

Man 1: RUUUUUUUNNNN!!!! IT'S GODZILLAAAAAAA!!!!!

Man 2: No. It looks like Godzilla, but due to interdimensional copyright laws, it's not.

Man 1: STILL, WE SHOULD RUN AWAY LIKE IT IS GODZILLAAAAAAAA!!!!!

Man 2: Though it isn't.
rampant

11-16-06, 09:22 PM		Dorvos - Geh gah gaaaah

Serene - Awwwww so cute! gotta get this on an image crystal.

Satnak - zzz

Satnak has fallen asleep with Dorvos trapped in her arms.
---------------------------------------

Tirmek - Hi-ya

Sarah - Hrarrrrrrr

Elina - kehhhhhh

Sithis - VALARESH

a few paces back

Terra - Geeze do they have to go at it so hard?

Lisa - No, but its in their nature to do so.

Ketty - KEEP YOUR BODY MOVING!!! (to T&L) - He's just like mother, likes to pick a spot and stay there come hell or high water, she learned to keep moving eventually, but she didn't have Tirmek's muscle mass. He can get away with it and his body knows it. He does try, but he's just not as mobile as he could be.

Terra - Sarah has a different issue, Can't keep herself out of the melee when she rages. Tends to drop her weapons as well.

Lisa - Elina, really doesn't have any major flaws as far as technique or strategy, aside from being 10 years old and such. But she doesn't have much in the way of Killer instinct. She's competitive, but she doesn't have Sarah's fury, or Tirmek's cold cunning.

Feal'theas - Sithis just isn't much for weapons work. He's a mage through and through. Need a fancy chain of eldritch theurgy woven, He's your dead-man. Need a series of swift cuts that defy all laws of physics and logic, not so much.
rampant

11-17-06, 02:11 AM		Maladren - (i.h.h. i wonder how the new defense is working)
------------------------------

The three Rakshasa are bent over a piece of paper with "there is a map to the Knightmare prince on the other side of this paper" wriiten along each edge on both sides.

Rakshasa Sorcerer - I've examined every fiber of this paper and yet I still cannot unlock the folded dimensions around it.

Rakshasa Assasin - Its an old guild trick you fold the paper based on a cypher and the map is revealed.

Rakshasa Sorcerer - ... The Eye of course we must use them in tandem!

Rakshasa Bard - Are you sure Maybe that flying island thing with the sign painted on it was a better lead.

Rakshasa Sorcerer - Ridiculous it said so right on the side "He's not here"

Rakshasa Bard - Maybe he's there now?

Rakshasa Assasin - Shut up Spoony
Charles Phipps

11-17-06, 03:45 AM		Hahaha, love the Godzilla bit!

http://img292.imageshack.us/img292/4572/exaltedky4.jpg

IC:

Lilly: Auntie!

Terra: Don't call me that.

Lilly: My brother and I wish to learn from you and Auntie Lisa.

Ivy: He wants to get close to your daughters.

*Lisa raised her hammer but Terra put her hand down*

Terra: The girls can handle it.

*A hammer is thrown and hits Lilly in the back of the head*

Lilly: It's true! Now that I've ressurected mom, I need to be able to show her that I'm a worthy son and that requires being the best warrior possible!
urial angel of death

11-17-06, 07:47 AM		Kerrith: But master I'll be hurt!

Nalfien: Now we'll have none of that. Get out there. Us magic types have to remind the others that we're better than them.

Kerrith: Alright.

----------

Kerrith areas a few p[aces away from the fight.

Kerrith: Skull trap.

Others: *currently engaged in melee* &*#$%
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-17-06, 07:53 AM		Tabitha: Admiral, a moment of your time.

Jarlot: Not now. I'm having Ketler build a giant Mecha Lizard of Destruction so we can contain the escaped Lizard of Destruction.

Tabitha: Wouldn't there be a lot of collateral damage?

Jarlot: Please, if I wanted logic I wouldn't be an evil genius.

Tabitha: Then I'll limit myself to having you sign the yearly tax report.

Jarlot: Good. Now………………:blink:…………………since when do we collect taxes? We're pirates! We plunder places, not have them send us money in the mail!

Tabitha: Call it what you like sir, I just need you to sign here.

Jarlot: *grumble* Fine. (scribble)

Tabitha: And here. (scribble) And here. (scribble) And initial here.

Jarlot: Why just initialling?

Tabitha: Thats to show that those scribbles are your signatures.

Jarlot: There! Now, tell me how it is that we collect taxes.

Tabitha: I wouldn't actually need to come to you if I could find Captain Rose, but according to the form I made him fill out he's taking a Secret Kidnapping.

Jarlot: Secret Kidnapping?

Tabitha: Yes, sir. It's a prearranged kidnapping. The form doesn't have a space for listing the reason.

Jarlot: Taxes.

Tabitha: Well, it seems that after we blew up Sharn one too many times a majority of the inhabitants couldn't afford to rebuild. So they petitioned the government of Breland to sue us.

Jarlot: :pbbbtt:

Tabitha: That's what Captain Rose said. So they went and moved into the underdecks.

Jarlot: Squatters! :mad: We shall drive them from their poverty-stricken hovels in a good old-fashioned purge! :fight!:

Tabitha: I would advise against it, sir. And I wouldn't call them "poverty-stricken", exactly. (shows him the tax figures)

Jarlot: Humph…………:blink: :OMG!

Tabitha: Apparently they've tapped into the multidimensional doorway at Erk's Place. They are currently acting as the trading hub for all the planes in the Eberronian cosmology, as well as several other cosmologies.

Jarlot: We've got :censored: Sigil in our basement!

Tabitha: Roughly, sir, yes.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-17-06, 09:41 AM		Others: *currently engaged in melee* &*#$%
Kerrith is currently fleeing at top speed.

Elina: *Dispel*

Sarah: I call dibs on his shins!

Kerrith: *whips out his Big Book of Useful Tips for Wizards* "Wizard Tip #38: When your enemies begin calling dibs on where they will beat you, scream or pray." You've gotta be kidding m-

*Smite of Show-offiness*

Kerrith: :weep: Ow...

Tirmek: *arriving with the rest* The hell?

Lilly: I have smited the perpetrator for you, my loves!

Sarah: Groan...

Sithis: :rolleyes: *whispers to Tirmek* You have to give him points for persistence.

Tirmek: *whispers back* Now if he can only avoid an unneccessarily crude request.

Elina: :bored: I suppose you expect us to thank you.

Lilly: I do not require any material compensation. Your kisses of gratitude and adulation will be more than enough reward. :D

Elina & Sarah: *angry pom* *hammer beating*

Tirmek: Guess it was too much to expect from The Son of Spoony.
rampant

11-17-06, 11:18 AM		Satnak - Ok Dorvos *yawwwwn* you gotta *yawwwwn* gotta ... what was I talking about?

Serene - Go to bed I'll wake you if he needs feeding.

Satnak - I can't just let you do this by yourself.

Serene - You have to sleep, we don't. I've survived this long with you asleep for a third of the time I can handle this.

Satnak - But I don't wanna miss anything.

Serene - BED!

Satnak - yes love
Chrys

11-17-06, 11:28 AM		D’Ducky walks upper decks of the FF looking for Ishtar’s Mother… or any else he could give her to so that she would be safe. He then come across Aerith scolding another baby about using death rays in side the ship.

Stewie: What the duce! Ishtar stop with your lollygagging and help kill this infernally cheerful woman!

Aerith: Aww what another cute baby… Oh Hi D’Ducky is she yours?

D’Ducky: No I found her in the lower decks and decided she would better off with some one watching her…

Aerith: oh Well she is most likely one of P/Y/R’s then. I’ll watch her too I’m watching Stewie for her now.

Ishtar: Goo * the G-cube then leaps on the Solor … sliming her.*

Aerith: * Sigh * D’Ducky do you mind keeping an Eye one them I need to go shower off…

D’Ducky: Sure this Aer, I should have warned you about that.
rampant

11-17-06, 07:29 PM		In super advance mega-reenforced play pen

Rashour - :bigeyes:

Dorvos - :bigeyes:

Ishtar - :bigeyes:

Stewie - Whats wrong with you simpletons? have you no dignity?

On chairs outside the pen

Serene - This was a wonderful idea.

Caralot - Its good to to get them used to other people.

Terrek - I'm just glad I can stop chasing Rashour for two minutes.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-18-06, 03:58 AM		Terra: Very well.

Lilly: :D Seriously?!

Lisa: My question exactly.

Terra: He wants to prove himself, that much is obvious. I also hear much about wanting to change the world for the better. Sounds like someone I know. ;)

Lisa: :embarrass Eh heh. Still, what's on your mind?

Terra: *to Lilly* I want to see just how serious you are.

Lilly: I'm very serious.

Terra: Many say that under favorable circumstances. We'll see if your attitude changes when everything isn't quite so easy.

Lilly: *anime sweatdrop*

Lisa: (i.h.h.) Can't you tell? You can just scan him.

Terra: *telepathic link* He's sincere enough now, and I can sense he has a reason behind his goals, but I'm not willing to go farther in without good reason. Besides, in my experience, scanning can only give you so much. The mind can be read, the body can be measured. The spirit, however, is another story entirely. It is notoriously difficult to judge. Yet...it can be the deciding factor between victory and defeat, life and death, happiness and sorrow. Most of the crew are still alive only due to their refusal to give in. The two of us are no exception.

Lisa: So you plan to push him till only his will to go on remains?

Terra: More or less. I've got the feeling that he's more than he lets on. That he's more than just "mini-Rose". If anything, this may distract him enough to keep him from hitting on the girls more.

Lisa: :D There's the maternal instinct at work.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-18-06, 09:06 AM		Terra: Now we just need the greatest creators of adversity in existance.

13: You rang? :devil:

Bunny: :bored:

Lisa: Exactly what is Bunny doing here? :confused:

13: Well, I can only go so far with my power. Anything that might kill him has to involve Bunny. Keeps things balanced.

OOcat: Balance is overrated.

Bunny: Let's see here:
Terra: …He's sincere enough now, and I can sense he has a reason behind his goals, but I'm not willing to go farther in without good reason.…The spirit, however,…It is notoriously difficult to judge. Yet...it can be the deciding factor between victory and defeat, life and death, happiness and sorrow. Most of the crew are still alive only due to their refusal to give in. …
Okay, I recommend starting with a Triple-F.

Lily: Triple-F?

Bunny: Forgotten Freedom Fall. Essentially we kick you over the side.

Lily: :eek: And how does that test my spirit?

Bunny: Well, according to narrative elements any time a hero falls out of the sky they land very close to where they are needed.

Lily: Assuming I survive!

Bunny: :bored:

Lily: Oh, right.
Lord Kale Fangblade

11-18-06, 10:21 AM		Sithis and Naz'roth stood on the training grounds, a shimmering magical target stood opposite them. Naz'roth turned to Sithis

Naz'roth: Seeing as this is your first lesson with me, I'll need to gauge your power levels. all i want you to do is use a basic Eldritch strike against that target there. Then i'll move onto teaching you as much of my vast magical knowledge as possible.

Sithis: just how vast is your magical knowledge.

Naz'roth: Vast enough to keep me near the top of the power levels on this ship, belive me, in the past we used to have to fight constantly to remain on top. now its calmed down somewhat, everyone prefers it this way, especialy me. i can continue with my research undisturbed. and they wont have to worry about me killing them in their sleep.

Sithis: but compared to Sa'vor... how powerful are you?

Naz'roth: When i was on this ship with him, he was quite close to being my equal. now.... he's most likely beyond anything i can do. but, seeing as he's dying his mind is basicaly falling apart. so the resovoire of energy that all spell casters draw on is getting more difficult to access. it wont be long before certain entities that he owes begin to collect their dues.

Sithis:*pause* which entities would these be?

Naz'roth: Some demons, Some Devils, I know that one of the other Daemon lords has a claim on him. Theres Also the Dark Six, and Vol. as well as certain necromancers that he owes. and finaly theres Terrek.

Sithis: you think Sa'vor will actualy pay them?

Naz'roth: *chuckles* hell no. he's far too much like me to pay back anything he owes. he only keeps debts with people he's sworn oaths to repay. its his twisted code of honour thing. i think the only one he'll pay back will be terrek.

Sithis: do any of these debts move onto me?

Naz'roth: I doubt it. though i expect maybe one of the Necromancers debts will. they're like that necromancers. especialy the powerful ones, they hold grudges.

Sithis: .... that means they'll come after me right?

Naz'roth: not when your powerful enough to challange them. and definetly not when your on this ship. even gods are afraid of this crew, especialy the Ubers. we dont really have a good reputation when it comes to gods and powerful beings.... or when it comes to anything but mass murder and destruction that makes the mourning look like childs play.

Sithis turned and channeled his energy, feeling the eldritch power begining to energise his body. he struck. unleashing a bolt of deep purple energy that exploded on the magical target. causing it to ripple slightly. Naz'roth watched as the Target reformed.

Naz'roth: (I.h.h) hmmm.... intresting..
Charles Phipps

11-18-06, 07:59 PM		Ivy: Uh...brother....?

Lilly: Yes....

Ivy: You look like you've been dragged over hot coals.

Lilly: No, they just dumped me in the Para-elemental plane of Ash.

Ivy: How is that supposed to train you?

Lilly: I don't know.

Ivy: What's next?

Lilly:Next I'm going to be dumped in a pit of leeches.

Ivy: GAH! This is crossing the line between torture and....TORTURE! I'm going to give them a piece of my mind!

Lilly: No don't!

Ivy: Why?

Lilly: They'll never respect me that way. My entire life I've lived underneath the shadow of my father. He's a good guy and a champion of justice but everyone treats him like he's a gigantic joke. This despite being a hero for centuries. I can't live like that.

Ivy: Is what other people think of you really that important?

Lilly: It's more than that. There aren't any genuine heroes anymore in this place. The Last War killed everyone that thought fighting for what's right was a good idea and everyone who still believes that is treated even worse. Lisa spent years being mentally abused by the other crew until she stopped fighting evil to marry Terra.

Ivy: You don't think they believe you're a real paladin?

Lilly: I'm eleven Ivy. If not for the fact that ridiculously powerful child clerics runs in the family then I wouldn't believe it either. However, I want to help people and take the fight to the bad guys that make this world a worse place.

Ivy: A lot of people think the Forgotten Freedom does that.

Lilly: Given the number of Rakashasas, Daelkyr, Quori, and Rajahs that would have destroyed the world without them that also goes to show my point. This world is on the brink of oblivion and no one CARES enough to say that maybe we DO deserve to survive. That humanity IS worth a damn.

Ivy: Heavy stuff.

Lilly: I'll endure whatever they have to do to me in order to prove that I'm worthy of being a Arcane Paladin. With the power of wizardry and good studied hard from a young age...maybe one man can change the world.

Ivy: I'll be with you every step of the way.
urial angel of death

11-18-06, 09:12 PM		Gregory: *stepping into the room* :weep: That was beautiful. *wipes tears* That is exactly the kind of spirit mistress Lisa and I have been looking for. She might need somemore tests, but I for one believe in you.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-18-06, 09:12 PM		Lilly: No, they just dumped me in the Para-elemental plane of Ash.
13: Yeah, on second thought that wasn't much of a plane for heroic deeds.
Lilly: …My entire life I've lived underneath the shadow of my father. He's a good guy and a champion of justice but everyone treats him like he's a gigantic joke. …
Commentary Crew: :blink:

OOcat: We're talking about Rose here? :confused:
Lilly: …The Last War killed everyone that thought fighting for what's right was a good idea…
Bunny: They knew the risks when they signed up for the job. Heck, they knew the risks long before they signed up for the job. It's not exactly advertised as a cushy job……wait, yes it is, it's how I meet my quota.
Lisa spent years being mentally abused by the other crew until she stopped fighting evil to marry Terra.
13: There are two things wrong with that statement: First, some of us have never stopped. I mean we only did it because she needed to see what a pain she was being to the universe. Second, she hasn't either. She just fights evil further up the chain.
Lilly: …I want to help people and take the fight to the bad guys that make this world a worse place.

Ivy: A lot of people think the Forgotten Freedom does that.

Lilly: Given the number of Rakashasas, Daelkyr, Quori, and Rajahs that would have destroyed the world without them…
Wise-Old-Quotes-OOcat: The ignorant and fearful kill the bat, and then complain about how there are too many mosquitoes.
……that also goes to show my point. This world is on the brink of oblivion and no one CARES enough to say that maybe we DO deserve to survive. That humanity IS worth a damn.
Solve-The-Problem-NOW-OOcat: Does humanity deserve to survive with the destruction and suffering they willingly inflict on everything around them and themselves? :rant:

Fun-Seeking-OOcat: Come on, they do funny things without trying! :D

Poke-Holes-In-Everything-OOcat: Humanity suffers from an inflated sense of self-worth combined with an overactive desire complex and a paranoia that they will not gain everything they hope to gain. This is perfectly normal behavior for any animal that has gained sentience yet still posses instinct. :teach:

Double-Checking-Poke-Holes-In-Everything-OOcat: But does that count in Eberron? :detect:

OOcat: Okay, break it up, fragments!:whatsthis
Lilly: …With the power of wizardry and good studied hard from a young age...maybe one man can change the world.
Humor-OOcat: Creatus HarryPotterus spoofus! :D

Lawyer-OOcat: Ours is not to debate whether the comment is appropriate. Ours is simply to point out how Everthing is silly.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-18-06, 09:13 PM		Gregory: *stepping into the room* :weep: That was beautiful. *wipes tears* That is exactly the kind of spirit mistress Lisa and I have been looking for. She might need somemore tests, but I for one believe in you.
13: Oooooo, Punching-Bag's back.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-18-06, 09:22 PM		13: There are two things wrong with that statement: First, some of us have never stopped. I mean we only did it because she needed to see what a pain she was being to the universe. Second, she hasn't either. She just fights evil further up the chain.
OOC: Just FYI, Lilly has a bit of a problem with arrogance and self-rightiousness considering he is treated more or less like his father. I may be wrong, but I think that's why he's saying she gave it up. He's still in the "evil -> destroy" phase most Paladins never grow out of, so he sees Lisa's lack of body count as signifying she's no longer devoted to fighting evil.
urial angel of death

11-18-06, 09:25 PM		Solve-The-Problem-NOW-OOcat: Does humanity deserve to survive with the destruction and suffering they willingly inflict on everything around them and themselves?

OOUrial: *in grim reaper outfit* Now they do too. If they died off it would destroy an enormous portion of my friend's species' economy *points to diabolic looking OOKaizer*. Which would in turn get rid of the only buffer between the demons and the rest of the multiverse. The material plane would be overrun by armies of celestials and fiends, turning it into nothing more than a burned out husk. See the entirety of existence depends on humans.

OOC: Maybe that sounded funnier in my head.
urial angel of death

11-18-06, 09:32 PM		OOC: Just FYI, Lilly has a bit of a problem with arrogance and self-rightiousness considering he is treated more or less like his father. I may be wrong, but I think that's why he's saying she gave it up. He's still in the "evil -> destroy" phase most Paladins never grow out of, so he sees Lisa's lack of body count as signifying she's no longer devoted to fighting evil.

OOC: She really doesn't seem to be fighting evil. She's more preoccupied with her family. Which admitably(sp) is an equally important job true, but she hasn't been shown to be fighting evil. Then again it could have been implied that she is off screen, that I: just didn't notice. After all I didn't realize that they traveled to different planets in this latest Doctor Who between episodes, until five episodes after he regenerated. So if she is please tell me.
Charles Phipps

11-18-06, 09:41 PM		OOC: My guess is that Lisa's full time job is to prevent the Forgotten Freedom's darker impulses from spilling over into the world and given that her influence has helped reign in Kanatash amongst others, that's a bigger accomplishment than Miko the Paladin from Order of the Stick could ever do.

And yes, Lilly is an arrogant little **** but he's 11.

As for deserving to live, well that's a question of existentialism. Nevertheless, SOMEONE has to be the Apollo level optimist on this ship.

Admiral Jarlotdama: *intense glare*

President Aerith: Admiral Jarlotdama, you will wear a dress.

Admiral Jarlotdama: I will not wear a dress.

President Aerith: You will endanger the fleet if you don't!

Admiral Jarlotdama: Fine.

President Aerith: He does everything you ask if you just ask him twice.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-18-06, 09:45 PM		OOC: She really doesn't seem to be fighting evil. She's more preoccupied with her family. Which admitably(sp) is an equally important job true, but she hasn't been shown to be fighting evil. Then again it could have been implied that she is off screen, that I: just didn't notice. After all I didn't realize that they traveled to different planets in this latest Doctor Who between episodes, until five episodes after he regenerated. So if she is please tell me.It's like all the pirating that gets done off screen. It happens, but it's assumed instead of spelled out. That, and when your fighting evil by setting an example and using diplomacy 90% of the time instead of by the sword, it's not terribly epic to behold. :P

I just never liked the idea that being a Paladin meant killing evil, period, end of story. The idea behind a Paladin is one of defending the good and the innocent. Too often this is taken as a license to kill anything that doesn't fit their ideal. This technically follows the code, but only by the letter of the law, not in the spirit it was intended. If she still stuck by the letter as she used to, Lisa would not hesitate to try and kill any number of the crew. But she realizes that, despite being less than ideal people, many of the crew have redeeming qualities. She works to change minds rather than spill blood. Just look at Terra. She's practically true Neutral at this point due to Lisa's influence.

OOC: My guess is that Lisa's full time job is to prevent the Forgotten Freedom's darker impulses from spilling over into the world and given that her influence has helped reign in Kanatash amongst others, that's a bigger accomplishment than Miko the Paladin from Order of the Stick could ever do.That's actually a great way to put what I see her doing. Less long-winded, too. :D
Charles Phipps

11-18-06, 09:54 PM		Rose: Yes, well Lilly doesn't want to end up like me.

Gregory: He has a good head on his shoulders.

Rose: Where the Hell have you been anyway?

Gregory: There was a tear in the fabric of reality on the fourth deck. It accidentally lead me to be teleported into The World's Largest Dungeon.

Rose: What was it like?

Gregory: Very strange, there were thousands of other adventurers there and most of them said they waited for rooms to respawn as they fished for gold and traded characters.

Rose: Ah, you landed in the Multiplayer version.

Gregory: I'm sure you wasted no expense in trying to rescue me.

Rose: if you like.

Gregory: He is right though, the other crew treats you abominably.

Rose: I like not being taken seriously. If I wanted to be taken seriously I would admit that I once spent months rousing the people of Thrane in a crusade against werewolves and that it was my doing that lead to the impaling of thousands on silver pikes with the full intent of genocide in order to make my mark on the world.

Gregory: Hmmm?

Rose: Oh nothing, just rambling. Bards are always underestimated in just how much damage that words can do to the world. Better to be a joke and make people laugh than incite their passions to destroy.

Gregory: Your son doesn't want to be a bard.

Rose: No and he's not a boy anymore. When you're old enough to kill, you're old enough to be treated as a man. Terra doesn't know this but I brought him to a werewolf's den to scare him. It was evil and cruel but no threat to anyone because it lived far away from any populated areas. I expected that he'd run away and learn the lesson to leave sleeping dogs lying.

Gregory: What happened?

Rose: He killed it. At eleven years old, he slit a full grown hybrid's throat and then stabbed it through the heart and in a dozen other vital areas with his silver shortsword.

Gregory: How did he feel about killing it?

Rose: How a boy feels about war. He felt like he'd gotten his first point in the game. He's not like some of the paladins and genocidal but....
Crystalforged

11-19-06, 12:03 AM		Kitten sits in a park in sharn overlooking a crudely drawn crayon map of Khorvair with a number of red Xs drawn through nations. Her hello kitty backpack sits next to her and tears crease her eyes.

Kitten: Well, where do I have left to go? Those people in the eldeen reaches chased me off calling me mean names. Those Karnathies kept biting me and then running off without a word of explanation clutching their throats. The thranes kept talking about "purifying me with the flame" before tieing me to a piece of wood and starting a fire under it. The Dragun made me play all these strange games with a bunch of disheveled humans. The Arundir just threw up their hands and waved these white flags before running away. The Talenta made fun of my hight and those big lizards didn't play very nice.

Kitten lets out a long sight before leaning back against her backpack.

Kitten: There just doesn't seem to be anyplace where I'm welcome. Here in sharn I haven't been chased off yet but I haven't been welcomed by anyone either.

Man: (walks up Kitten) Well just looking at you I can tell you aren't going to fit in with normal people. People fear what they understand. You need to find a place with other people who don't fit in with normal society like yourself.

Kitten: (sitting up) Really, where would that be?

Man: Well the best place for you would probably be the Forgotten Freedom, they get all sorts there, so I doubt you would really be all that out of the ordinary there.

Kitten: I suppose...

Man: (picking up backpack) Well I suppose I had best get going, I've got things to do. (walks away)

Kitten: That was an aughly nice man. I knew Mommy was wrong about people. Wait a moment... Where did my backpack go to? I had it a moment ago. I was leaning against it until right before... that man... showed up... :weep: I suppose I had better just go back home to the Forgotten Freedom.

Passerby: (overhearing) You're from the Forgotten Freedom! No! Not again!

He runs over to a nearby post with a what resembles a firebox attached to it. A glass window infront of it says, "Break in case of Forgotten Freedom"

Passerby: You've blown up your city many time before but not this time! If the city is going to be destroyed WE'RE the ones who are going to do it and we're going to take you with us! (breaks glass)

*explosion of Dragon Ball Z proportions*

Kitten: (sitting unharmed in the center of the crater that used to be sharn) :weep: :weep: :weep:

---

Elsewhere

Bunny stands over the corpse of the man who robbed Kitten wearing a hockey mask and carrying a chainsaw.

Bunny: :D An oldy but a goody.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-19-06, 08:05 AM		Elsewhere

Bunny stands over the corpse of the man who robbed Kitten wearing a hockey mask and carrying a chainsaw.

Bunny: :D An oldy but a goody.
OOC: You get an :emp: award.
IC:
Mysterious Voice: Did you try Droaam?

Kitten: Huh? Who're you? Why can't I sense you?

Mysterious Voice: I'm a Narrative Propulsion and Exposition Voice. I keep storylines moving along. So did you try Droaam? I mean, it's full of creatures that wouldn't be normally accepted anywhere else on the continent.

Kitten: They took one look at me and called me a disgrace to monsterdom.

Narrative Propulsion and Exposition Voice: Ouch.………Okay, the Shadow Marches?

Kitten: They found out who my dad was and then tried to seal me under a big rock.

NP&EV: Oh, yeah, Gatekeepers. Maybe the Mournlands?

Kitten: Too fleshy.

NP&EV: Mror Holds?

Kitten: Said I was preapproved for a credit card.

NP&EV: *shudder*………………I've got it, the Lhahaazar Principalities! They're all pirates, can't be too different from your home.

Kitten: Exactly. Even the nice old lich lady turned out to want to take over the world.

NP&EV:………………………………………I got nothing.

Kitten: You haven't asked me about Q'barra.

NP&EV: Who gives a ******** about Q'barra? :confused:

Kitten: So there's nowhere. :weep: Nowhere that people are basically nice and kind, even after they find out that you're an aberration related to Kanatash of the Forgotten Freedom.

NP&EV: Except on the Forgotten Freedom.

Kitten: *weeping piteously*

NP&EV: Of course, that's only this Eberron.

Kitten: :weep:…………:blink: :confused:

NP&EV: You didn't know? There are multiple Eberron versions, each with a different take on things.

Kitten: Oh, yeah. I've heard about those. Auntie Satnak comes from one.

NP&EV: And so does your sire (i.e. "father"). I hear it's a nice place.

Kitten: Really?

NP&EV: Oh, yeah, sure. Demons, daelkyr, anything can walk the streets without being killed on sight. You've got a half-sister who's a lycanthrope and head of the Silver Flame. I mean, it's not perf—

Kitten: YAY! :D (leaps high up into the air) I'll show daddy! I'll show him that people are basically good!

NP&EV (really OOcat): Not what I meant to do. :eek:
urial angel of death

11-19-06, 10:06 AM		Elsewhere

Bunny stands over the corpse of the man who robbed Kitten wearing a hockey mask and carrying a chainsaw.

Bunny: :D An oldy but a goody.

OOUrial: I take away your reward because Jason never used a chainsaw.

OOForged: :bigeyes:

OOUrial: Oh I can't stay mad at you... I guess the copycat killer did have use one... You can have it back.

OOForged: :D

-------

Kantash: Ketty, I was wondering if you could disprupt power flows at long range. That could negate the Imperium's planet destroying weapons forcing them to come down here where we have a chance to beat them.
cypher_zero

11-19-06, 11:17 AM		OOC: Umm.... nevermind. Any who may have see that, please ignore it.
.
Crystalforged

11-19-06, 01:07 PM		NP&EV: Of course, that's only this Eberron.

Kitten: :weep:…………:blink: :confused:

NP&EV: You didn't know? There are multiple Eberron versions, each with a different take on things.

Kitten: Oh, yeah. I've heard about those. Auntie Satnak comes from one.

NP&EV: And so does your sire (i.e. "father"). I hear it's a nice place.

Kitten: Really?

NP&EV: Oh, yeah, sure. Demons, daelkyr, anything can walk the streets without being killed on sight. You've got a half-sister who's a lycanthrope and head of the Silver Flame. I mean, it's not perf—

Kitten: YAY! :D (leaps high up into the air) I'll show daddy! I'll show him that people are basically good!

NP&EV (really OOcat): Not what I meant to do. :eek:
Well I wasn't quite done yet but if you want her now you can go ahead. The last of my stuff can wait until after she gets back.

OOC: Umm.... nevermind. Any who may have see that, please ignore it.
.
Well you've got me curious now...



P.S. I want to put that award in my sig, what should I say its for?
Kaizer_Ryu

11-19-06, 03:00 PM		On the outskirts of a small frontier town somewhere in Thrane:

Lilly: So, what am I supposed to do here?

No answer.

Lilly: *looking around* Hello...? Pfff. Great. First she tells me I'm being tested, then neglects to tell me what on, then ditches me in the middle of nowhere without a clue as to my next destination.

A piece of paper poofs into existence in front of him. It reads as follows:

And you call yourself a PC? PC Rule #18 clearly states that when you're unsure of your next destination, seek out any conveniently placed structures, such as towns, houses, and the like. Get with it, boy!

Lilly: She didn't have to be rude about it...

As he approaches the gate, he sees a guard and a man in red armor talking. As he gets closer, he begins to make out what they are saying.

Guard: Welcome to Corneria.

Fighter: I like swords.

Guard: Welcome to Corneria.

Fighter: I like swords.

Guard: Welcome to Corneria.

Fighter: I like swords.

Lilly: (i.h.h.) Oh, great. One line NPC's. Just keep walking. Don't make eye contact...

Upon entering the town, he immediately begins talking to the citizenry.

Man 1: *for the 6th time* Welcome, warrior.

***

Woman 1: *the 5th time* This is Corneria.

***

Woman 2: *for the 7th time* Greetings, Light Warriors.

***

Man 2: *4th time* Stay at the inn to restore your HP and MP.

***

Lilly: What is with these people?! It's like I'm stuck in some 8-bit game with no data room for more than one line per person! *deep breath* ...ok, clam down. Maybe the tavern will have some info. That's always the place Dad starts...

*some hours later*

Lilly: :banghead: What kind of crappy-ass backwater town doesn't have a :censored:ing TAVERN?!

Another piece of paper appears before him.

You're too young to drink, and they wouldn't let you in in the first place, so it wasn't necessary.

Lilly: Grrrrrr... Wait, maybe the church would have something...

*later*

Lilly: They don't even staff the damn thing?!?!

Yet another paper.

It's a "crappy-ass backwater town". They don't have enough people for a full time priest. We're going over the PC rules again when you finish.

At this time, he comes across a rather suspicious looking man hiding behind a building. He looks quite scruffy and is fidgeting slightly as he mutters under his breath. One hand sits on the hilt of his blade as it rests in it's sheath.

Suspicious Looking Man: I've got to do this quickly. If anyone sees me, I'm done for... *notices Lilly* :eek: w-w-w-w-what do you want? Get out of here! Don't you think it's a bit rude to eavesdrop? :ahem:

Lilly: :bored: Uh-huh. *SMITE*

The world fades and Lilly finds himself back in Terra's demi-plane. Terra stands nearby, looking as if she has a migrane as she rubs her temples.

Terra: *through gritted teeth* Why did you do that...?

Lilly: He was obviously up to no good.

Terra: And what makes you say that?

Lilly: A man slinking around in a back alleyway, clearly waiting for someone while he prepares to strike. Seems pretty cut and dry to me.

Terra: What would you say if you just killed the NPC you were intended to aid?

Lilly: *incredulously* You wanted me to assist a criminal?!

Terra: *sigh* No. He was a spy for the Church, trying to avoid the servants of the Lords of Dust so he could expose their own spies within Thrane. He was waiting for a carriage to arrive so he could hide in it and escape. You just killed the only one who knew. Great job. You failed spectacularly.

-----

Lilly is currently tied up on deck as Sarah, Elina, and Tirmek eat ice cream nearby.

Elina: I can't believe how hot it is today.

Sarah: It's got to be a record of some kind.

Tirmek: *looking at Lilly* But these ice cream cones sure hit the spot. :devil:

Sarah: Oh, don't be mean to him.

Elina: :( Are you sure he can't have any?

Terra: Absolutely. If he want's to learn to be a great warrior, he must accept the consequences for failure.

Lilly: :allalone:

OOC: In case it wasn't clear, Lilly was placed in a simulated environment. Unless otherwise stated, that's where these things take place.
rampant

11-19-06, 04:16 PM		Ketty - ...That kind of manipulation is not taught anywhere but the Island. Potencially we could set off a big enough mealstrom to disrupt energy flow, like your mournlands. But unless we pretty much shattered the plane they could just adjust their aim to compensate... I hate to say it but Tirmek is the only one here who could do that. Satnak is resting in Tesseris.
-------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - My power is limited... If we placed some sort of amplifiers amongst the sibyris ring...and I'd need Sithis to help.

Ketty - He's not been there as long.

Tirmek - True, but he can learn fast enough. He has to, alone I can disrupt the weapon, but the energy will get away from me and could still do a lot of damage.

Kanatash - (i.h.h. I hate it When they get that look in their eyes)
---------------------------------------------------------

Satnak - I don't like cities, too much background noise, too many places to ambush someone.

Serene - You're being paranoid you silly girl.

Satnak - :embarrass I've got to protect my son.

Serene - You have got to relax. You do so much. *nosekiss* We're safe here.

Satnak - ... If you say so.

Allyssa (pure-blood yuan-ti with fiendish traces) - SSSERENE! I haven't sseen you ssince the Feasst *hug*

Satnak - grrr

Allyssa - This little cutie must be Dorvos. Can I ...

Satnak - *glare*

Allyssa - Of coursse, I've forgotten my mannerss. (brings fingers to her forhead and bows slightly while maintaining eye contact* Greetingss Princess.

Satnak - *glare*

Allyssa - (i.h.h. sseeing her from the balcony was one thing, this is sscary)

Serene - Satnak, this is Allyssa, a friend. *significant look*

Satnak - ... Apologies, I'm not a very trusting person.

Serene - You trust me though.

Satnak - With all that I am.

Serene - Allyssa is a friend.

Satnak - Alright.

Satnak reluctantly allows Allyssa to hold Dorvos.

Dorvos - Geh:confused:

Allyssa - He'ss sso adorable, hass a lot of teeth for an infant.

Satnak - First of three sets.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-19-06, 05:18 PM		Well I wasn't quite done yet but if you want her now you can go ahead. The last of my stuff can wait until after she gets back.
OOC: No, no, I just put that there because it worked there. Now she knows where to go to find good people, just sort of mix in the idea that she's searching for a way to get there while you do your stuff.
P.S. I want to put that award in my sig, what should I say its for?
OOC: Accurate portrayal of a god of death, more specifically Bunny. Or whatever you feel it represents.

OOcat: Slacker. :bored:

OOC: :mad:
Charles Phipps

11-19-06, 06:00 PM		OOC: Awwww, I love Kitten.

Rose: He'll make a neat pair of mittens!

Down!
Charles Phipps

11-19-06, 06:10 PM		Achika: Hey Terra.

Terra: Hi Chika.

Achika: I just came to see how training my son is going.

Terra:...not well.

Achika: How so?

Terra: Well he's certainly got the skills, which is strange for a normal human boy.

Achika: *snort*

Terra: Ignoring that, mostly his attitude.

Achika: Not dedicated enough?

Terra: Exactly the opposite. Your son is a bit....intense.

Achika: Let me guess, you tried to scare him off and he ran head first into it?

Terra: Yes. An 11 year old willing to burn on the plane of Ash is not a normal reaction.

Achika: You took him plane hopping?

Terra: Oh don't be stupid, it was all illusion.

Achika: What's he doing now?

Terra: He's pointing out the Monstrous Manuals say that Red Dragons are always evil.

Achika: Those things are intensely racist.

Terra: I love his answer to 'Is it wrong to kill orc cubs' question.

Achika: Oh no.

Terra: Yes, you wait until they're grown up and Chaotic Evil.

Achika: Well at least he's passing the Corenia simulation now.

Terra: ....not so much.

Achika: I read Lisa's review. It was a 100% the second time around.

Terra: He now uses Detect Evil THEN kills. But only in the wilderness. He just spies on the Evil in town and readies them for URK.

Achika: I see.

Terra: Rose is such a laid back fellow, where is he GETTING this? Also, I'd like to know where he's getting his equipment too. I found a 8 foot long Holy Avenger of Smiting in his knapsack.

Achika: Well I died fairly early Terra, Lilly was raised by his stepmother.

Terra: Suddenly things are making sense.

***

Zella: Remember Lilly, Seperate But Equal lines for Goblins and Humans means shorter lines for everyone!

Lilly: Right mom.

Zella: And the thing you have to recall is that Lisa is a power gamer. She married the EVIL tricksey Druidess because she's after the extra boost to her skills. These Rogue Flamite paladins are always capable of craziness like that.

Lilly: I had no idea.

Zella: Now here's a wand of fireballs. We're going to go now to a nice Blood of Vol ceremony and fireball the zombies.

Lilly: SWEET!
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-19-06, 06:46 PM		Zella: Now here's a wand of fireballs. We're going to go now to a nice Blood of Vol ceremony and fireball the zombies.

Lilly: SWEET!
Bunny: I think I'll join you.

Lily: So it's okay? :D

Bunny: No, but I kinda don't like undead because they ruin a perfectly good slaying by bringing the body around for another go.
********
OOC: I just noticed something about Kanatash being the mother and Caralot being the father.
"It's cold outside! There's no kinda atmosphere! I'm all alone, more or less…"
Kaizer_Ryu

11-19-06, 06:59 PM		"It's cold outside! There's not kinda atomosphere! I'm all alone, more or less…"YEEEESSSSS!!!!! I'm not the only Red Dwarf fan here!! :D

IC:

Admiral Wolverine Lightningbolt wanders the halls.

A.W. Lightningbolt: This is mine...and this is mine...and this is mine...

-----

Lisa: So that's why he's all intense and "would be evil if not for his belief that he was doing the right thing"?

Terra: Yeah.

Achika: The 'holier than thou' attitude is part of the Videogame Princess PrC. When your constantly the most important person in a quest, it tends to over inflate your self worth.

Terra: Thus the reason we broke up. She wanted to be the center of attention and started ignoring me any further than it took to get what she wanted. :( But Lilly's a smart kid. He'll figure it out eventually.

Lisa: Or go Blackguard.

Terra: Or that, yes.
rampant

11-19-06, 07:52 PM		Sithis - Grrrrrrrr Slow down Tirmek, I can't keep up!

Tirmek - Then move faster.

Sithis - I can't!

Tirmek - Not with that attitude. We're projecting! We don't have the same limitations.
----------------------------------------------

Elina - We wanna learn projection!

Sarah - I'm sick of Tirmek having a dozen powers I've never even heard of!

Lisa - That's not his fault.

Terra - Yeah his entity spends way too much money on supplements, so it makes up for never being able to use half of them here.

OORampant - Nyah nyah:P
Crystalforged

11-19-06, 08:47 PM		OOC: Awwww, I love Kitten.

Rose: He'll make a neat pair of mittens!

Down!
OOCrystalforged: Hm, even if it is spoony, he still has an entity so I suppose Bunny is right out. Looks like this one is for you 13.

13: :schemes: Are you familiar with a game called "superman 64"?

Rose: :mymy: No.

13: You will be.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-19-06, 08:50 PM		YEEEESSSSS!!!!! I'm not the only Red Dwarf fan here!! :D
Gregory: Why do I have a metal "H" stamped on my forehead? And appear to be incorporeal?

Stupid: Oh, that just means you're dead. Don't worry, for if this you dies you shall definitely go to Silicon Heaven.

Slip: And at least you aren't a disembodied head who can only appear on computer screens.

Marish: Yow! Yeah! I'm so cool! :D
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-19-06, 08:51 PM		13: :schemes: Are you familiar with a game called "superman 64"?

Rose: :mymy: No.

13: You will be.
13:………………………Just as soon as someone tells me the rules.

(OOC: Sorry, it's just a whole lot of fun to poke holes in humor, especially when it duplicates my real life. :D )
urial angel of death

11-19-06, 09:39 PM		Kanatash: Wonderful! If Tirmek can do enough damage to force them down here it will be atleast possible for us to achieve victory.

----------

Lilly is entering the wilderness in a new simulated world. An enormous forest area loads and a catchy tone starts playing

OOUrial: Dot dot do, dot dot do, dot dot do

A robed figure approaches Lilly. His face is obscured by a large black hood.

figure: Hello. Would you like to by something young sir?

Lilly: Detect evil. *flash of red*

Lilly draws a gigantic sword and charges. The figure easily blocks it with a sword pulled from his cloak's many fold. He changes the direction of Lilly's momentum sending him flying.

figure: Now that was rude *charges Lilly*

Lilly: Well you're evil! *desperately blocking blows and obviously overmatched*

The figure jumps over Lilly and lands behind him. Before he can react the figure has his sword pressed to Lilly's neck.

figure: Do you surrender?

Lilly: Never! *activates spring-loaded blade guantlets*

The blades plung into the figure's arm. He immediately grabs his arm where it was cut and falls over.

Lilly: *placing sword under the rim of the figure's hood* Now let me see you face before I kill you. *lifts hood*

Lilly steps back in shock as the figure's face is revealed. It is Gregory. Who hastely jumps up and flees, as the world dissolves around them.

Terra: You fail again! Aura's can easily be reversed and divinations can be wrong.

Kerrith: Exactly why I don't use them.

Terra: Get out of here!

Terra and Lilly chase Kerrith out of the room and don't return. Igor comes by some time later as part of his cleaning routine.

Igor: *sees silver colored gooey liquid* Wonder what they've been up to. Shoot forgot my lisp! *mops up liquid*
Charles Phipps

11-19-06, 10:42 PM		http://static.flickr.com/115/300617718_60261929db.jpg
Kaizer_Ryu

11-20-06, 02:54 AM		:heehee OMFG that is hilarious!

IC:

Terra: Ok, Lilly. There's something I need to make clear. You're a smart kid, but you can be really stupid at times.

Lilly: :mad: Blunt as always, I see.

Terra: You depend far too much on your ability to detect evil. EVERYONE has at least some evil in them, and therefore will register as evil to some degree. Try casting it on me.

The aura of evil glows deep red.

Lilly: HAH!!! I knew it!

Terra: Shut it, little boy. Now cast Detect Good.

The aura of good glows with an equally intense white.

Lilly: But...how can...you just...?

Terra: I am infused with the pure essence of both Good and Evil. Get used to it. This just demonstrates my point. Using Detect Evil as a reason to kill something is no better than others using the fact that your father is a Spoony Bard as an excuse to beat on him.

Lilly: You do that too!

Terra: I taunt him because he is my brother, the Captain, and a scoundrel. Now are you going to listen or not?

Lilly: Grrrrr...

Terra: What is your duty as a Paladin?

Lilly: To destroy Evil!

Terra: And how do you go about doing that?

Lilly: By killing it, of course.

Terra: But where do you draw the line? At what point does someone become so evil that they must be destroyed?

Lilly: Errr...

Terra: Where does redemption factor into your hardline stance? Mercy? Compassion? Are these not good as well? Are they not required qualities of a Paladin?

Lilly: But...I...

Terra: There is something I must give you.

She pulls out a package. It is obviously a book by the shape of it. She then hands it too him.

Terra: Open it.

As he tears away the paper, it reveals The Book Of Exhalted Deeds. He looks at it, stunned that she could be near it, much less touch it.

Terra: This is the kind of thing you strive for, yes?

Lilly: With every fiber of my being.

As he holds it, he begins to notice a slight tingling in his hands. It quickly develops into a stinging, then a stabbing pain. Smoke begins to rise as the book in his hands react negatively to him. Unable to endure anymore, he drops it.

Terra: You are far from the ideals you expouse, yet you use them to judge others by. You retain your Paladinhood the same way most do. You cannot entertain the thought you might be wrong in your methods.

Lilly: *opening and closing his burned hands* How could someone like you even begin to judge me for falling short of this most holy of tomes judgement?!

She walks over and picks it up. The tome glows slightly in her hands, accepting her. She stands over him, gazing into his eyes. He desperately wants to turn away from her stare as he feels it burn into his soul, but cannot. He opens his mouth, but no words emerge.

Terra: Because I am forever connected to someone who does meet it's approval. You claim my wife no longer fights evil only because you recognize fighting evil as solely a physical ordeal. Think of what this ship would be like if not for her influence. I myself am living proof of her efforts. She fights evil with words and actions. She shows the minions of evil compassion and kindness. When she does take up the sword, any who surrender are given mercy. Those who do not harm her or those around her are given the benefit of the doubt. You will never be a great hero so long as you take the easy path.

Lilly finally finds his voice.

Lilly: Easy! You call what I've been doing easy?!

Terra: You will see that what you percieve as hard and what actually is hard are quite different. We are done for now.

Lilly stands and heads towards the door, more than a little angry.

Terra: One last thing. Do not have those burns healed.

Lilly: You expect me to suffer through them?!

Terra: I expect you to remember the pain they have given you and will give you. Carry that memory as proof that you are not perfect. Remember the pain, and remember that you have room for improvement. I will check them tomorrow.

Lilly: An if I do have them healed? What will you do?

Terra: Nothing at all. This is not my lesson to learn.

He turned and left, fully intending to go straight to Micky. As he turned down the hall the clinic was on, he slowed, then stopped. He lifted his hands and stared at them. After a few moments, he lowered them again, turned, and headed for his room.
Charles Phipps

11-20-06, 04:18 AM		Ivy: brother...

Lilly: Leave me alone Iv.

Ivy: I just wanted to talk.

Lilly: There's nothing to talk about. I'm a disgrace to Dol Arrah.

Ivy: I don't believe that.

Lilly: The Book of Exalted Deeds rejected me. I'm a failure, a nothing, a squire but never a knight.

Ivy: That's not true.

Lilly: I'm leaving.

Ivy: Huh?

Lilly: I can't stay here Iv. The only reason I could before was because that maybe, just maybe, if I showed myself to be a paladin of worth then people would stop laughing at us.

Ivy: I don't mind being laughed at. Sounding like an 11 year old in a Warforged shaped suit of armor is funny.

Lilly: It's more than that Al. Terra pretty much stripped me of my faith that being a paladin is going to help anyone.

Ivy: NO!

Lilly: What's the point of being able to detect evil if it's not to find those that hurt other people? Have you stopped for one moment to listen to the horror stories about what the Cardinal did to Lisa as a child? How about what that Count did to mom? If I can't find them before they hurt anyone then what GOOD am I?

Ivy: Brother.

Lilly: Worse, there's Sarah and Elina.

Ivy: They're still your friends Lilly.

Lilly: They're going to be demigod champions of whatnot and whozat Ivy. They're not going to have time for a washed up failed ex-Kid Paladin. They're the only people I've ever got to call friend in my life. I'd rather them remember me as a warrior than as a failure.

Ivy: You're not...

Lilly: Can it! If I can't be a paladin and champion light in the world then I'm goingo go fight evil my own way. For all Terra says, I know there's plenty of people in this world that HURT people. People that enjoy making others suffer and ruining their lives. They aren't going to be let off just because some of them might have a chance to do something other than screw up other peoples' lives.

Ivy: How will you know the good from the bad if you're not a paladin?

Lilly: I'll figure something out. Where Detect Evil fails, I'll just ask different questions with Legend Lore. Plenty of wizard spells can help in detective work too. Maybe I can even stop some crimes before they happen.

Ivy: This sounds very dangerous.

Lilly: I'll be fine....but they won't ever see me again. Tell mom I love her.

*Lilly lept over the side of the ship*

Ivy: NOooooooooooooooooooooo!

*Lilly floats down with a feather fall spell*
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-20-06, 08:03 AM		Lilly: ………People that enjoy making others suffer and ruining their lives.………
13: Okay, time to instigate rule 2.

Silver: What does taunting Cardinal Crozen about his inability to capture the ship have to do with this?

13: No! Our rule 2: Rules are made to be broken. With as much force as possible.

Silver: So which rule are you breaking?

13: I'm going to spiritually advise Lilly.

Bunny: And by that you mean what you normally do, only with a bit more hands-on. :bored:

13: :D
*********
13 appears next to the falling Lilly.

13: This, sir, is your lucky day, for I have been sent by the great E.B.N.E.s to guide you in your quest to find your purpose.

Lilly: Go away.

13: Oh, going to get all angsty? Well, you'll need to look the part……

13 changes into some tailor clothes, and hurriedly starts measuring Lilly.

13: First, that coat-and-cuirase combo, what are we trying to say here? Unlikely hero?

*POOF!* Lilly is now clad in overdone black half-plate.

13: I like it! Muyé emo!

Lilly: But I'm trying to be a doer of good! What are people going to think of me in this?

13: Don't you have any conception of the black-clad vigilante who goes around frightening the criminals? It's a classic!

Lilly: Would it……would it get people to take me seriously?

Silver: Honey, the girls will be falling all over you. ;)

Lilly: :embarrass That's not what I meant!

Bunny: Listen, kid, you're never going to measure up for them if you act as if the universe owes it to you to let you stamp out evil. You've got to work for it.

Lilly: And so how do I do that?

13: By learning how criminals think. And because this world hasn't developed behavioral profiling, the only way to do that…………is to live in their world.

OOcat: OOCharles'll never allow us to do that.

13: Quiet, you, we're on a roll.
rampant

11-20-06, 10:29 AM		Tirmek - You see why I like his projection trick?

Sithis - Yes, the things you see...

Tirmek - Ok Lilly

Lilly - Oh no I'm already going mad.

Tirmek - No I'm just using a nifty telepathy power I picked up.

Sithis - Is there an echo in here?

Lily - Come to taunt me about losing my powers, Incarnate?

Tirmek - You have lost nothing. You are merely trying to escape growing up.

Lily - What are you on about?

Tirmek - Simple you are a Paladin Prodigy. Like all prodigies you have to make a choice. Either grow up and admit you still have a lot to learn, or continue as you are and try to scrape by on talent.

Lily - ...are you helping me?

Tirmek - You could look at it that way.

Lily - You never liked me.

Tirmek - I still don't.

Lily - Then why?

Tirmek - My dislike of you aside, you are trying to do the right thing. You're just going about it the wrong way.

Lily - I always thought you were a cool calculator who never acted outside his best interests.

Tirmek - There's a common misconception that associates cool cunning with villany. Its the one's who let their emotions run away with them that do the most harm. Also acting in your own best interest is not inherently evil. Acting at the unnecessary expense of others is.

Lily - Oh great you're going all sage mode on me.

Sithis - There is an echo in here.

Lily - ...wait a minute what do you gain from this? If I stay you've gained nothing, if I leave you've got less competition for Elina's and Sarah's attencion.

Tirmek - Because pervy creep or not yhey still consider you a friend, and a "failed ex-paladin kid" is in no position to tell them who or what to spend their time on.

Lily - Okay you're being mean now.

Tirmek - Life hurts get some scale mail. Anyway grow up or don't its not my decision just realize this is crunch time.

Sithis - (singing) Poke poke poke your medula oblongata.

Lily - Well that can't be healthy.
rampant

11-20-06, 10:57 AM		Satnak - ahem...

Allyssa - Of coursse, (hands back Dorvos) back to your mother cutie.

Dorvos - mah

Satnak - getting close kid

Allyssa - One track mind on that one.

Serene - Family is important.

Allyssa - He hass your eyess, but more...

Serene - I know he gets that from her side, Ketty and Tirmek have the same intensity.

Allyssa - :confused:

Serene - Her sister and nephew.

Allyssa - Ah, ...

Serene - What's wrong?

Allyssa - It'ss jusst, you're a married woman now, i'm worried you might not want to hang out with uss anymore.:(

Serene - Don't be silly, we just need to buy enough food for Satnak...

Satnak - :) I'll be good.

Serene - Good because the kitchen staff hasn't been the same since.:D

Allyssa - I think Reggie will jump out of his skin when she walks in the food court.
-----------------------------------

The mall complex consists of floating buildings connected by transparent walkways, each building has a different architecture.

zoom in on a large open air structure built like a mead hall, the roof is folded out over the sides ready for inclement weather

Satnak - (holding many shopping bags with her tail) I'm still amazed they had clothes for Dorvos. I was afraid I'd have to learn to sew.

Allyssa - Tell uss about yoursself, where did SSerene find you... do you have a hobby? what'ss your family like?

Tebera (ghost elf with oversized claws on her hands) - Yes any brothers? cousins?

Satnak - No, just an older sister, Ketty, and her son, Tirmek, and he's too young for you.

Tebera - Damn!

Allyssa - You're boy crazy you know that.

Tebera - And why not? they're such cuties. (tickling Dorvos's nose) Yes you are.

Dorvos - *giggle*

Serene - Oh hey Reggie!

Reggie (Scaly hobgoblin) - Oi You brought the devourer hersel! are you trying to drive me to an early grave?

Serene - She’s promised to be good.

Reggie - So I may get out of this with my silverware?

Satnak - That depends on how good the food is.

Serene - Stop scaring the cook.

Allyssa - You know the ussualss Reg.

Satnak - I’ll have the lunch sampler platter.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-20-06, 02:08 PM		The mall complex consists of floating buildings connected by transparent walkways, each building has a different architecture.
Silver: Whoa, hey, a mall! Teenage romance!

OOcat: Terrek's dimension. Back off.

Silver: Awwww. But where else can Sarah and Tirmek have a campy "drinking an icescream float through two straws" moment? :(

Bunny: It's not their type of activity.

*wait*

Silver: Aren't you going to ironically give me the correct set-up?

Bunny: I'm learning. :P
rampant

11-20-06, 04:03 PM		Tirmek - I feel pink.

Sithis - It's Probably Sarah and Elina dying your fur again.

Tirmek - Okay you've studied enough to know how to manipulate energy.

Sithis - Only if its uncontrolled, an attack from an opponent has too much will behind it to manipulate.

Tirmek - The more power behind an attack the harder it is to control. Now attacks from items, machines, and artifacts are hard to disrupt initially but more easily manipulted once the disruption is in effect.

Sithis - Why the projection?

Tirmek - So we can begin at the source besides it makes it a little easier to manipulate energy.

Sithis - If large amounts of energy are hard to control then how...

Tirmek - Simple practice makes perfect.

Sithis - Ah so...

Kanatash - *KAMEHAMEHA*
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-20-06, 04:06 PM		Kanatash - *KAMEHAMEHA*
Obscure-Facts-OOcat: What does a legendary Hawaiian king have to do with it?
rampant

11-20-06, 09:05 PM		Tirmek sinks his claws into the energy stream and shatters its flow converting it into a wild cloud of destruction.

Tirmek - Raaaaahhhhhh

Sithis converts to his swarm form and enters the cloud twisting it around trying to channel it to his will. After a few moments the storm expels Sithis and obliterates a nearby hill.

Tirmek - That is why we're practicing in the mournland.

Sithis - (reforming) Um... hurting over here.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-20-06, 09:34 PM		…the storm…obliterates a nearby hill.

Tirmek - That is why we're practicing in the mournland.
Godforged Cleric: Well practice somewhere other than next to our giant head! Look, there's a giant crack in it!

Godforged Manager: That's the giant butt, sir.

Godforged Cleric: As the follower of a construct god I am acutely aware of any actions that could bring the wrath of the inevitables down upon me. One should note that was not a bad pun until after I said it.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-20-06, 10:06 PM		Terra sits leaning on the back of a chair as Lisa rubs her shoulders.

Terra: *sigh* I over did it.

Lisa: You didn't intend for this to happen.

Terra: But it did. I just wanted to shock him out of his self-righteous fervor. I never meant to crush his hopes.

Lisa: I'm not sure anything less could have gotten him to come off his high horse. I know first hand how hard it is to escape that kind of mentality.

Terra: But the Book of Exhalted Deeds?! What was I thinking?!

Lisa: That's your question to answer.

Terra places her hands over hear face, sighs, then drops them.

Terra: ...I wanted him to become a true Paladin, a defender of the weak, not a simpleminded zealot that kills based solely on alignment.

Lisa: And he still might. He's only a boy. The idea of a black and white morality is very seductive, especially to young idealists. The idea of good and evil as shades of gray to be waded through frightens him. He wants evil to be something visible, clearly identifyable, and simple to destroy.

Terra: What do I tell Achika? I drove him away. Who knows what will happen now.

Lisa: You tell her the truth. Then we think of a way to restore his faith in the Paladin's code.

Terra: Much of this depends on Lilly. The true way of the Paladin is something of beauty and worthy of respect. I only hope he realizes that.
rampant

11-20-06, 10:24 PM		Lily - You know I should have waited until i was closer to the ground before using that spell. Its worn off.

------------------------------

Izzy - Can I please go to the bathroom?
---------------------------------------

Tirmek - What are they using on me? its not coming out!

Sithis - You need a better system.

Tirmek - Izzy is untrustworthy, Kerrith is useless, Ivy is too slow, Lily is being angsty, Lady scares me, Maladren isn't quite over that whole knightmare prince thing, Kitten is back-packing accross khorvaire, Stewie would slit my throat, Ishtar is a baby, the cats have their own problems, Dorvos is unavaliable, and You're working with me.
urial angel of death

11-20-06, 10:40 PM		Kerrith: I am not worthless!

Tirmek: Yeah prove it and help here.

Kerrith: First off using your own body and mana to manipulate large amounts of energy is not only dangerous and stupid, its wasteful. We need some sort of mana converter or large energy crystal then once the flow is contained you can use your natural ability to much better after.
Charles Phipps

11-20-06, 10:58 PM		OOC: I wanted to say I really loved the Lilly conversations you all did. They were extremely well done.

***

Hamlet

*Lilly looks like Edward Elric except his clothes are now all black with a skull like the Punisher on his front shirt*

Lilly: SMITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTEEE!

*lifts eight foot sword while he's only four foot six and pretty much obliterates his target*

Lilly: Okay, that's one more child molester to my count.

Villager: Oh thank you Fair Paladin!

Lilly: No I am afraid I am not worthy of that mantle. Instead, I am a grossly angsty and brooding vigilante on a quest for revenge.

Villager: Revenge on who?

Lilly: Well I've had a pretty easy life to be honest so it hasn't happened yet but I'm getting pre-emptive about the evil. Woe. Brood.

Villager: *steps back a bit*

Lilly: Fighting crime is much easier than hunting down monsters.

Rose: Lilly.

Lilly: Oh no, it's a tragic reminder of my previous life!

Rose: Uh...huh.

Lilly: You can't convince me to return to the Paladin's way! I'm lost and forsaken! A reason to brood.

Rose: Lilly, if you become Emo I swear I'll see you dead first.

Lilly: Err.....nevermind then.

Rose: You haven't lost your paladinhood anyway.

Lilly: Just an oversight from the Gods. I'll lose it any day now. See? Blasphemy.

Rose: Oh brother.

Lilly: So what is it you want to talk about? As long as it's not about being a paladin, we'll be fine.

Rose: Paladinhood.

Lilly: Great.
rampant

11-20-06, 11:05 PM		Tirmek - Mage we're talking about a tech effect. Its almost impossible to break an effect like this without access to blueprints, and designer's notes we can't even begin to understand the flow lines I know its dangerous! but at this level without more info and about a year objective time ( thats including FF distortions ) its the only choice, a non-sentient can't keep up at this level without being specially built forthat exact event. Besides (eye's glow) I AM INCARNATE!
urial angel of death

11-20-06, 11:09 PM		Kerrith: What if you used a substance that can handle any amount of energy with ease, and we have access to? Void.
rampant

11-20-06, 11:18 PM		Tirmek - Gulllllllllllg I was really hoping you wouldn't say that.

Sithis - Izzy?

Tirmek - Yep he might be the best shot but we have to secure his loyal... :lightbulb ty... :evillaugh
---------------------------------------------------------------

Maladren - Well you certainly can't seem stay out of trouble.

Izzy - You again:eek:
Charles Phipps

11-21-06, 01:24 AM		Rose: Lilly, you're trying too hard.

Lilly: I am the Night, I am....ROBIN!

Rose: Oh God.

Lilly: The Book of Exalted Deeds rejected me. I failed. No matter what people say.

Rose: Just because you failed doesn't mean you can't make yourself worthy of it.

Lilly: Huh?

Rose: You worked for your status as a Paladin Lilly, it'll be hard but you can work to become even better. That requires you to follow Tirmek's advice though.

Lilly: Exalting and following Tirmek's advice seem to be an odd combination.

Rose: I know. Basically, let's talk about your chief problem.

Lilly: Evil people have a lot of hit points and weapons usually do only 1d10 damage at best. My strength score sucks and even when I have my Gauntlets of Ogre Power it only adds +4 so with my Holy avenger I can inflict a maximum of 25 damage per round with the addition of smite.

Rose: I was more thinking about paladinhood.

Lilly: Oh, what good is Detect Evil exactly?

Rose: Well the problem Lilly is that you're using it as your guide when it's meant to be a supplement. When you suspect something evil is afoot then you should use it to determine if you think that person is capable of committing a crime. That gives you the measure of a person's character before you deliver appropriate retribution.

Lilly: Terra's evil though and she has committed all sorts of crimes.

Rose: Bluntly Lilly, Terra deserved to die before she met Lisa.

Lilly: :blink:

Rose: Terra likes to pretend she's only become a little softer but for a very long time she gave an ugly death to everyone she laid her hands on. Terra was healed just like Michael. Punishment isn't the goal of a paladin, it's only defense and protection.

Lilly: but sometimes punishment prevents future evil.

Rose: Very true. That's is your dilema as a paladin. It's also up to you to avoid sadism. Sometimes, it's better to just off a guy than try to inflict as much damage as he's done.

Lilly: I see.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-21-06, 03:41 AM		Rose: Do you also see why she was being so hard on you?

Lilly: I...well...no.

Rose: I told her about what you did when I showed you the Werewolf. Would you like to guess what her reaction was?

Lilly: Disdain?

Rose: Utter revulsion. You killed something that was not a real threat to anyone at the time for no other reason than it was evil and you had the opportunity.

Lilly: And I probably saved lives.

Rose: While true, can you be sure? What's to say that he would ever hurt another person for the rest of his life? What makes you think that the person you killed in cold blood even wanted to remain a Werewolf anymore and was, in fact, hoping someone would cure him? Perhaps he was in such a remote location on purpose so that he would not hurt others in spite of himself?

Lilly: All hypothetical questions.

Rose: No more so than your reason for killing him. They are all pertinant questions that every Paladin must face on a daily basis. Your Aunt was desperately trying to get you to realize that killing those with evil in their hearts is not the end all be all of Paladinhood. In fact, it can often be counterproductive.

Lilly: Why does this mean so much to her? She's not a Paladin, nor does it seem she ever will be.

Rose: She has had several nasty encounters with Paladins who lived and breathed "all evil must die" throughout her life. Yet...one Paladin gave her a chance. Lisa showed her kindness and compassion, where others of her order would have shown Terra nothing but contempt and hate. Through endless patience and encouragement, Lisa was able to turn Terra from a ruthless, bloodthirsty druglord with the deaths of thousands on her hands into a doting wife, a caring mother, and a loyal friend. Now which is the greater victory for Good? Terra's death or her new life?

Lilly: ...I see your point. *sigh* I thought I knew what I was doing, but it seems I've only been playing Paladin this whole time...

Rose: You have ample time to get it right. You do not have to follow the path Lisa took. She is simply one example of the light a real Paladin can bring to the world. Your mark may be something similar, or it may be wholly different. What it is is up to you and you alone.
Charles Phipps

11-21-06, 03:51 AM		Lilly: Well I guess I have three options.

Rose: Yes?

Lilly: Change for the better.

Rose: Go on.

Lilly: Don't.

Rose: Uh huh.

Lilly: Become like Ender and blow up the homeworld of the Scro!

Rose: BAD PALADIN!
Gladius_Lucix

11-21-06, 09:09 AM		Liam returns (after a heary meal and a long nap) to the Forgotten Freedom.

Liam: Swarm, what's going on recently?

Swarm: Lilly's doubting his paladinhood.

Liam: Existential problems? I can't help.

Swarm: Satnak had a baby.

Liam: Put "presents" on the to do list.

Swarm: And Tirmek, Sithis, and Kerrith are currently trying to stop a giant laser from destroying the world.

Liam: Is it Ketler's fault?

Swarm: No, seems they don't like some of Kanatash and Volrath's pets.

Liam: And that's a reason to destroy the world?

Swarm: Seems to be.

Liam: Alright. Let's check the Weirsan Shield for the ship, then see what we can do to help.


(OOC: I'll be away until next monday. Have Liam help with the new major threat how he can.)
rampant

11-21-06, 09:41 AM		OORampant - Formians or Abeil are a little closer to the bugs.
--------------------------

Satnak - And thats my life story, also this tatsu is delicious.

Tebera & Allyssa - :OMG:

Tebera - You poor thin-

Satnak - *glare* Don't you dare pity me. You asked, I told my story, I do not seek sympathy.

Dorvos - prrrt

Satnak - Excuse, me where are the bathrooms?

Serene - Over there *points down to the corner of the building* see the sign?

Satnak - Thanks love.
-exit-

Serene - Tebera! I can't belive you!

Tebera - What did I do?

Allyssa - Princesss SSatnak iss a proud woman. Yess, life threw her some scuzzy turnss, Yess, sshe hass little left of a once great family, but sshe hass fought hard and long to carve out a place for her and herss. By pitying her you marginalize her accomplisshimentss.

Tebera - Oh dear how do I make it up to her?

Serene - I severely doubt there's anyone thing you can do. When she gets back she will most likely continue on a different topic if we haven't already. You're just going to have to be careful until she forgives you.

Tebera - Great I've got a Princess mad at me. She's not going to have my birth certificate "lost" or something obnoxious like that is she?

Serene - You really don't get her do you. If she decided to hurt you, she'd break your arm. She's very direct, she'd have called you out already if I hadn't told her to be nice. You guys wanted to hear her story she told you, by pitying her you make it seem like you're making fun of her. I'll try to explain that that wasn't your intent.
Crystalforged

11-21-06, 11:46 AM		Liam returns (after a heary meal and a long nap) to the Forgotten Freedom.

Liam: Swarm, what's going on recently?

Swarm: Lilly's doubting his paladinhood.

Liam: Existential problems? I can't help.

Swarm: Satnak had a baby.

Liam: Put "presents" on the to do list.

Swarm: And Tirmek, Sithis, and Kerrith are currently trying to stop a giant laser from destroying the world.

Liam: Is it Ketler's fault?

Swarm: No, seems they don't like some of Kanatash and Volrath's pets.

Liam: And that's a reason to destroy the world?

Swarm: Seems to be.

Liam: Alright. Let's check the Weirsan Shield for the ship, then see what we can do to help.


(OOC: I'll be away until next monday. Have Liam help with the new major threat how he can.)
Far Far away

Kitten: For some reason I suddenly feel unloved...
urial angel of death

11-21-06, 01:16 PM		OOC: Rampant's right the Scro are orcs if I remember correctly and are nothing like the bugs.

IC: As the hiveships approached psionic powers became harder and harder to use, until even the simplest power could drain a psion completely and telepaths were driven insane by the nothingness around them. Only now with the Shadow completely enveloped Eberron did the Tyranids themselves appear. Spores began to fall from the sky. Where ever they impacted the ground was putrified and sprouted new alien flora. Soon the landscape was covered with horrific, puss spewing,bulbous plants and the strange chitin covered creatures that were once native animals. The spores being dropped got bigger with each wave, until they were large enough to carry the splinter fleet's soldiers. Soon worm-like rippers roamed the surface in packs one hundred strong, the slithering bodies of reavers bored labyrinthine networks of tunnels through the earth, and swarms of winged gaunts soared through the air.
Crystalforged

11-21-06, 01:43 PM		Kanatash: Just like home.
Gladius_Lucix

11-21-06, 02:07 PM		Scene: Liam's Laboratory.
OOGladius: Swarm, why did you leave out Kitten?

Swarm: Because you were going by what had happened since the last time you were here. Not my fault you're forgetful.

OOGladius: And it's not my fault that Kitten's entities are lazy.

Liam: Anyway, the shield looks good, Swarm. Hmm... This is strange. The worldwide baseline Weirsan has been slowly increasing. I wonder if this has anything to do with Volrath's "pets."

Swarm: Probably.

Liam: Sigh. Let's go see what's going on.

Liam and the Swarm leave the lab, looking for Volrath or Kanatash. Meanwhile, OOGladius looks around at the spare parts and other unused materials in the lab.

OOGladius: :plotting: :schemes:
Crystalforged

11-21-06, 02:30 PM		OOCrystalforged: :mad: Hey! I'm not lazy! I'm motivationally challenged!

OOKanatash: :rolleyes: Oh yeah, thats much better...
Lord Kale Fangblade

11-21-06, 04:27 PM		Tara, Naz'roth, Feal-Thas and the other commanders sit around a round table. strewn across it are maps of Korvoire, detailed area maps and intel on their opponents: the Tyranids.

Feal-Thas: You dont really think we could face these creatures on the ground? or in the air? or even on sea? they're killing machines. nothing we have could face them for long enough. we dont have enough men.

Naz'roth: so your saying we should just give up?

Feal-Thas: no. im just saying that if we try to take these things on in a pitched battle we'll be slaughtered.

Tara: then thats why we're going to have to change our tactics arent we?

Naz'roth: *slight smile* you have a plan dont you?

Tara: * evil smirk* indeed i do. its my reasoning that in a pitched battle we'd not stand a chance. they're numbers are far too supirior. but unlike our opponents we've got certain advantages. we can utilise the astral, Ethreal and Shadow planes to out maneouver our foes. if we use small and moblie strike teams to hit strategic targets we should be able to inflict more damage than we would in a pitched battle.

Naz'roth: *frowning Slightly* even with that we're still disadvantaged. our magic is matched by their warp powers. our armour is useless against their weapons. they're evolved to kill us.... * sudden idea* i wonder if they're weapons can affect incoropreal creatures?

Feal-Thas: Im not sure. we dont have enough information to verify that. what have you got planned?

Naz'roth: well, these tyranids feed on organic matter right? well, incorporeal creatures possess no matter for them to devour and are harder to affect. if we fight our shadow war with incorporeal undead we should be able to slowly starve them off since they would loose to many creatures for too little gain.

Tara: do we have any hope of winning?

Naz'roth: *features darkening* i doubt so. even with our tactics its still almost hopless. but im not letting eberron fall. ever. if i have too i'll die defending this planet. and by Kyber and the six i'll take the whole damn hive fleet with me if i do.

( Long silence, while each of them think over new ideas.)

Tara: *sigh* i wish Sa'vor was here. i know he'd be there right on the front line.

Naz'roth: *slight chuckle* yes, he was rather stupid like that wasnt he? but he's not here. and we are. *rising* we're going to need more intelligence on our enemies positions, *pointing to a robed Half-Drac* Kalgreth, i want your diviners working day and night to find as much intel as possible. * Points to a large Daemon with rams horns* Queck, i want you to open as many portals to Shavarath as possible and bring our brethrin in. we're going to need back up. Feal-Thas, Prepare the troops and brief them on the ops we've already got planned.
Tara, begin gathering spirits and preparing the undead forces for action.
* begins strideing from the room*

Tara: * rising from her seat and following him out into the corridor* Naz'roth, what are you going to be doing?

Naz'roth: *face grim* im going to find as many allies as i can. *sigh* if i have to, i'll call on Naur.

Tara: Naur... you cant call on him. he hates you. he'll kill you on sight.

Naz'roth: its worth a try. hopefully he'll put aside his hate for the greater good... hopefully.

Tara: ... alright. but... be careful okay? * Kisses him*

he smiles and vanishes with a thunderclap.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-21-06, 05:05 PM		Rose: …Lisa was able to turn Terra from a ruthless, bloodthirsty druglord with the deaths of thousands on her hands into a doting wife, a caring mother, and a loyal friend.…
Bunny: Who is still a ruthless, bloodthirsty druglord, just in a good way. :D
OOCrystalforged: :mad: Hey! I'm not lazy! I'm motivationally challenged!

OOKanatash: :rolleyes: Oh yeah, thats much better...
OOcat: I know how you feel.
*******
The Commentary Crew are watching the invasion from three theater seats.

Silver: Unusual crops this year.

13: Well, there goes the deposit.

Bunny: I support whichever side leaves me with a job at the end.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-21-06, 05:18 PM		Note: Due to the fact that no one can remeber them, we are dispensing with numbering the rules. (Like we need to refer to them.)

You are not allowed to build any of these warforged components: [Humor] Warforged components that shouldn't exist. (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=738383)
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-21-06, 07:06 PM		OOcat: Rose! Jarlot! I need to ask you two a question.

Rose: What?! Can't you see I'm trying to guide my son through an important life-defining experience?

Jarlot: Can't you see I'm trying to drink and womanize over here?

OOcat: But it's an important question! The fate of our entire multiverse depends on it!

Rose: Fine.

Jarlot: Okay, whatever.

OOcat: Right, now, if Jarlot is Jack Sparrow……and Rose is a useless pirate……Jack sort of plays an adopted-father role in a half-interested deadbeat sort of way……(plus I think spoonyness counts here)………does that make Rose Will Turner?

Rose and Jarlot: :uh-huh:
Kaizer_Ryu

11-21-06, 08:27 PM		Terra: Naz'roth, I need to speak with you.

Naz'roth: I'm a bit busy trying to stave off the destruction of this planet.

Terra: This regards that. Believe it or not, the Tyranids are not the real enemy.

Naz'roth: ...are you watching the same reality I am?

Terra: Volrath and Kanatash are friends of the hive mind. Nice fellow if you stay on its good side. They can just ask them to leave.

Naz'roth: Doesn't seem to be working now.

Terra: They are digging in. Something far worse follows them. The Imperium are hot on their tails.

Naz'roth: I've heard of them. They burn worlds rather than let the Tyranids consume them.

Terra: Exactly. We may need the Tyranids aid in order to survive. The enemy of my enemy is my friend. I would speak with Kanatash to see if he or Volrath can arrange something.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-21-06, 08:34 PM		Naz'roth: ……They burn worlds rather than let the Tyranids consume them.
Bunny: Sounds like the Silver Flame, advanced a couple thousand years.

Lisa: Hey! :mad:
Charles Phipps

11-21-06, 09:11 PM		OOC: I hope you like this Kaizer ;-)

Terra: So Lilly, have you finally returned.

Lilly: Yes.

Terra: So you admit I'm right.

Lilly: Yes.

Terra: Are you going to say why?

Lilly: Not if you don't ask me too.

Terra: You're still very proud.

Lilly: Yes.

Terra: Well my tests were designed to scare you into some sort of understanding. I don't know why they didn't work.

Lilly: Well that's your problem right there.

Terra: Huh?

Lilly: I'm a PALADIN Terra. That means that Dol Arrah has hardened my heart against all forms of fear both magical and nonmagical. It is literally impossible for me to be frightened of anything.

Terra: So that's why you didn't balk at being tortured across Elemental Planes?

Lilly: Nope.

Terra: You wouldn't have any problem going up against a Tarrasque?

Lilly: I'd die but I have no particular hesitation about it.

Terra: You're not even afraid of death?

Lilly: Should I be?

Terra: The basic nature of ALL ANIMALS is fight or flight response. You're telling me you have only fight?!

Lilly: Well when there's EVIL AFOOT what other answer could there be?

Terra: GAH! You've learned nothing!

Lilly: Not at all. I've learned a great deal of the lesson you meant to teach me. Obviously, you made me realize that the best way to be a paladin is to prove how utterly horrid a target is FIRST so when he's destroyed then it will encourage the public to have confidence in their church!

Terra: *smacks her face*

Lilly: You also informed me that Detect Evil and other abilities can be fooled so I must put my attribute raise into wisdom in order to better be able to determine how to hunt my enemies without being fooled!

Terra: You missed it completely!

Lilly: Finally, you've eliminated my prejudice against the evil nature of certain beings. By working to redeem other evil doers they can provide me with plenty of information about more belligerent monsters that will allow me to help destroy even MORE evil!

Terra: :twitch:

Lilly: You're the best teacher ever Terra! Now let's begin some more lessons!
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-21-06, 09:20 PM		Terra: :twitch:
13: First rule of real teaching: if you don't tell them exactly what you want them to learn, be prepared to accept that they may not learn what you want them to learn.
Second rule of real teaching: If you still aren't satisfied, then you must forcebly mold their minds until they have the information encoded.
Third rule of real teaching: If you aren't willing to forcebly mold anyone's mind, then WHAT IN THE NAME OF THE E.B.N.Es ARE YOU DOING TEACHING?!
urial angel of death

11-21-06, 09:20 PM		Head Chaplain Pershing walked along the bridge of his ship, the H.E.S. Rosenburg. The target planet was approaching and he was feeling nervous, an emotion space marines don't usually feel. There were so many things wrong with this mission. First of these being that the world had twelve moons, but no ring and was far too large for a terrestrial planet. Second was the unfamiliar energy source that the planet radiated. The Tau mystic they had in the brigg called it "magic", just leave it to the Tau to come up with crazy fairy tales and superstitions. Thirdly the humans of the planet peacefully interated with numerous alien species that mimiced human perfect in a grotestue mockery of the god-emporer's image. Final and most frightening of all was that they Tyranids weren't consuming it. They're actually digging in and building bunkers and fortresses with their blasphemous alien technology. For the love of the god-emporer they're even terraforming! There was only one option in a sitution like this exterminus.
As Pershing knelt down to pray he was interrupted by a little girl running around the bridge and frantically screaming. She was Catherine his head psyker. While her warp powers were second to none Pershing still doubted his commander's wisdom in sending her on a mission against the Tyranids at such a young age.

Catherine: *clutching the chaplain's legs for security* Please make it go away! Make the lonely go away! There's nothing around me anymore! I can't hear mommy or grandma or pappy anymore! :weep:

Catherine's entire family had died during early in her training when she lost control of her powers.

Pershing: *lifting her up* Don't worry once we kill the monsters everything will be back to normal and you'll be able to hear all the voices again.

Catherine: *wiping tears from her eyes* Do you promise?

Pershing: I promise.
cypher_zero

11-21-06, 09:20 PM		OOC: Hmm... Must think of some way to write Terrek as Horus...

Edit: In hindsight, that probably wouldn't work too well. Maybe I'll just have him show up leading a chaos legion...
.
Charles Phipps

11-21-06, 11:15 PM		Ella: Poor Poor Lilly.

Sarah: Oh come on! There's nothing poor about him! He's arrogant, a jerk, and the worst stereotypes of a paladin!

Ella: Hey! I'M supposed to be the one he's in love with.

Sarah: Huh?

Ella: Stop being so mean to him! Otherwise, you'll end up together!

Sarah: :stare:

Ella: You know how these stories work!

Sarah: Uh...huh...

*steps back slowly*

Lilly: AT LAST! I HAVE ACHIEVED FOURTH LEVEL IN MY PALADIN CLASS!

Sarah: What are you so happy about?

Lilly: It's time to get my mount!

Sarah: Uh...huh.

Elina: What sort of mount are you going to get?

Lilly: I have no idea! However, I hope it's not a dirty dirty worg.

Elina: Err...

Lilly: Do I LOOK like a Goblin?

Sarah: Lilly...

Lilly: Paladins have to have racially appropriate mounts! Humans get horses, Goblins get wolves, and Elves get griffons or giant eagles. It's the way it works.

Elina: What do Dwarves get?

Lilly: They get nothing because Dwarves can't give up liquor long enough to become paladins. Halflings get dinosaurs because they like to overcompensate.

Sarah: Okay, then summon away. This should be good for a laugh.

Lilly: PALADINMOUNT! I CHOOSE YOU!

*tosses a ball into the center of the ground*

Elina: :stare:

Lilly: It's the ancient Paladin summoning ritual! I can't help it!

*A foal Unicorn appears with little pegasus*

Lilly: GAH! A UNICORN! NO!

Elina: Oh! It's so cute!

Sarah: OOooooo!

*the two go over to pet and snuggle it*

Lilly: This is horrible!

Sarah: What's your problem?

Lilly: It's a UNICORN! That means everyone will know when I ride it that I'm a....

*unicorn comes up to lick his face*

Lilly: It's not even fully grown up yet!

Elsewhere

Rose: I am not WILL TURNER!

Jarlot: Games up Mate, you might as well admit it!

Zella: I love corset lines!

Rose: Just as long as Zella doesn't fall for Jarlot.

Zella: That depends on how spoony you are.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-22-06, 12:12 AM		OOC: I was wondering if I'd be able to screw with Lilly's head some more, so yes, I do like it. :D

I wanted to do this just after Lilly got back, but I was unable to, so just assume it before Charles's bit.

IC:

*Hammer Beating: In STEREO*

Lilly: OW! What was that for!

Sarah: You big jerk! You just run off to be all angsty without telling us?!

Elina: You made Ivy cry!

*****

(previously)

Ivy: *emo Soulbound Warforged single tear*

Sarah & Elina: Awwwwwww...poor Ivy... :weep:

*****

Lilly: Oooookayyyy...

Elina: He told us all about your little speech.

Sarah: Since when did you need to compare yourself to us to measure your own self worth?!

Lilly: I just wanted you to respect me...

Elina: Becoming an angsty vigilante after giving up the first time you fail miserably is not going to do that. We have our own way of becoming Üb3r McPwnz0r, you have yours.

Lilly: Yeah, you've got innate power up the wazoo from all the bizarre stuff your parents went through.

Sarah: Don't you pay attention? We only get what we earn. What we have now we've gained only through hard work.

Elina: We'll never get any more if we don't do our best to become worthy. So you see, we have our own requirements for gaining great power. We're just further along than you.

Sarah: Besides, our power is supernatural in nature, and Magic and Psionic Classes outstrip Fighter ones at mid and high levels.

Lilly: Hey!

Elina: It's true. At low levels, the fighter protects the weak little wizard. At mid levels, the fighter acts as a meat shield to give the wizard enough time to cast. At Epic levels, the fighter sits down and cleans his fingernails while the wizard destroys hordes of enemies with a flick of his fingers.

Lilly: Well, it's a good thing I'm a Transmuter as well.

Sarah: :rolleyes: Whatever. Our point is, you don't have to be powerful to get respect from us. Look at our parents. Mom is far more powerful, but she respects Momma more than anyone.

Lilly: So...I have to become a lesbian?

Elina: *groan* No! You have to not be such a big baby and work for your place as a defender of good! No one will respect you if you don't pursue your goals through the bad times as fervently as you do though the good.

Lilly: I already tried the blind fanatacism route.

Sarah: Sweet Khyber you're thick...
Charles Phipps

11-22-06, 12:27 AM		Ella: By the way, exactly what was Ivy like before he became a warforged?

Lilly: errr......a bard.

Ella: What?

Lilly: Well he wanted to follow in dad's footsteps.

Sarah: Uh...huh.

Lilly: Let me flashback...

***

*A bunch of stick figures, one whom looks a great deal like Elan from Order of the Stick*

Ivy: Ah, isn't it wonderful to live a life of joy and happiness brother?

Lilly: We're about to be eaten by Goblins!

Ivy: Not if I PLAY MY LYRE!

Lilly: There's no time for that! And ewwwww!

Ivy: Huh?

***

Ella: There's a....Bardic Warforged?

Lilly: Yes, just when you thought there couldn't be anything stranger than a Druid warforged...

Sarah: Oiye.

Lilly: He also keeps his Familiar in his armor.

Sarah: What's his familiar?

Lilly: Some Stray Cat he found.

***

Ivy: There there little Cat, I'm going to take good care of you.

Kitten: Thank you scary armor man.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-22-06, 08:18 AM		Obscure-Facts-OOcat: I'll have you know that unicorns are actually one of the most fearsome creatures recorded in mythology. :mad: You have to use the whole "attracted to a virgin" method because they're so fierce.

Lilly: That's not the problem here. :(

13: The problem is that he'll be riding a My Little Pony knockoff for a few years. :P

Silver: Anybody besides me ever think it's a little odd that unicorns seek out virgins?—

Bunny: We all know where this is going, so shut up now before we get moded. :bored:

Silver: Anyway (turning to Sarah and Elina) I think you've failed to grasp a large, gaping flaw in your plan.

13: I'm supposed to be the one pointing out flaws.

Silver: This involves interaction between possible romantic partners, I can't take a backseat.

OOKaizer: TEN! :tantrum:

13: Now you're pushing me out of my schtick. :raincloud

Silver: :rolleyes: Oh, all right.

13: :w00t: Now, I know I don't have to explain ability scores because any basic player knows what they are about. So now consider that Lilly is really dense. According to the rules what does that mean? He's got low mental scores.

Lilly: Hey!

13: Oh, very likely he has a high Charisma, it's not something that a paladin can't skimp on, otherwise they're just a fighter with the ability to detect evil and fewer feats. That's one out of three. Now we need to find a way to test his Wisdom and Intelligence.

Lilly: Hah! As a paladin I need a Wisdom score to cast spells!

OOC: I'm stuck here: can Lilly cast any paladin spells? Does he have enoough Wisdom to cast any spells at all?
urial angel of death

11-22-06, 11:20 AM		Volrath: *holding derranged puppet and pig mask* I could test his mental scores!

OOUrial: Maybe...
Lord Kale Fangblade

11-22-06, 12:11 PM		OOC: thanks Kaizer for correcting my mistake. whenever i see tyranids moving towards me i always get a little jumpy... it comes from being an imperial gaurd player, wouldnt you be a little jumpy if your where a simple human in a universe full of geneticaly improved super soldiers ( space marines), Eldar, Orks , an infinite variaty of demons and their super soldier companion and cybernetic skeletons contoled by the C'tan.

Naz'roth: see, its not my fault. i just follow the script.

OOC: your not helping.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-22-06, 01:35 PM		If you find it on this list: 1001 uses for (a) cat(s) (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=742537), do not do it. Not only will you annoy an Entity, but Fluffy as well.
Chrys

11-22-06, 03:15 PM		D’Ducky: Ohhh Tyranids that reminds me of a Girl I used to date…

Volrath: We all ready did the whole Starcraft thing.

D’Ducky: Who was talking about that, I use to date the Bee Girl From Darkstalkers, and Lloth, and a Couple Fomiorian Princess…

Volrath: For a spawn of chaos your sure date a lot lawful things.

D’Ducky: Eh what can I say… Did I ever tell you about my date with the Lady of Pain?

Volrath: I don’t think we have time for that we have to Space Marines to deal with.

D’Ducky: Hey do you thing it will be that all female chapter? You know the ones that dress like sexy nuns?

Volrath: Err…

D’Ducky: IF you want I could call up one of my old…

Volrath: not unless she bring an army the big enough to stop the Marines…

D’Ducky: * pull out his little black book * Would you like the Tau, Necrons, or those Aztec like Lizards.

Volrath: How do you…

D’Ducky: Four words : Six foot long Tounge.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-22-06, 03:21 PM		D’Ducky: Four words : Six foot long Tounge.
Silver: :D

Bunny: She's designed worse. :bored:
Chrys

11-22-06, 03:35 PM		D'Dcuky: Bah your talking to a guy whose entiy made with left over bit made not one but three Elf/Tyranids crossbreeds.

OoChrys: One High, one Wild one dark :cool: ... I wonder what happen to all my warhammer stuff went. [:mad: Damn Movers:mad: ]

Terra: Yeah I'm going to have to ask both of you to stay the hell way from me and my kids
Charles Phipps

11-22-06, 04:25 PM		OOC: Well in 3.5 edition, its my understanding that you don't have ability requirements for a class. So ergo, the fact that Lilly has a 5 wisdom...

Lilly: WHAT!?

Won't even impact him expect in a few minor ways.
Crystalforged

11-22-06, 04:49 PM		OOC: Actually you need an ability score of 10 plus the spell level to cast spells so ergo, no spells for Lilly.



P.S. I'm about to embark on a 5 hour drive back home so you probably won't be hear from me for a while.

OOKanatash: They'd know the difference how?

OOC: Hush, you.
urial angel of death

11-22-06, 04:50 PM		OOC: You pitiful humans should feel afraid of the genetically superior collective. We will sooon take our place as rulers of the universe when the real hivefleet arrives. (Behemoth, Kraken, and Levitan were all just scout fleets for this monster)

IC: Chaplain Pershing had been prepared for the order of exterminus and was ready to go, but then Inquisitioner Hamilton showed up. He had to see a presentation of the reasons for the planet's destruction and the heresies that had been commited on it. Then he had to go on in a long drawn out speech to the crew about how they were doing the God-Emporer's will.

OOC: Rampant have them lauch the super weapon whenever you're ready.
Charles Phipps

11-22-06, 05:09 PM		*Lilly hoists a bag of Purina Unicorn Chow over one shoulder*

Lilly: Lousy Celestial Powers thinking Lilly is a girls' name....getting mixed up...grrr.

OOCharles: Lilly....

Lilly: Yes, Creator mine?

OOCharles: I'm looking over your character sheet. You have a FIVE wisdom?

Lilly: Yeah, so what?

OOCharles: You're a PALADIN that took WISDOM as your dump stat?

Lilly: You act like it's a big problem.

OOCharles: It is!

Lilly: Well I have 18s and 17s for all my other stats. That's pretty much impossible to repeat via rolling. I wasn't going to give that up.

OOCharles: Yes, but WISDOM.

Lilly: Don't forget I'm also a Wizard. I put 18 into Strength because as a Fighter I need to deal Damage, 17 into Dexterity and Constitution because they're both really important skills for my low Hit Points at first level from Wizardry, and then another 18 into Intelligence for bonus spells. Now if I was a pure min-maxer then I'd have put my 5 into charisma like our foreign exchange paladin from Sarlona.

Miko the Paladin: ALL WOMEN ARE *****S!

Lisa: Aren't you a woman?

Miko the Paladin: HYPOCRISY! SMITE! *hits herself with her mace*

Lilly: She's an import from a system that still uses Comeliness. Otherwise she'd look worse than Doog.

OOCharles: Despite it being the LEAST problem, you realize you'll never be able to cast clerical magic.

Lilly: Oh whoop de fricking do. Big loss there. I have Lay on Hands, so I can cure myself that way of most wounds. Furthermore, I can use all clerical magical items. All I have to do is get outfitted pre-game.

OOCharles: It leaves you incredibly dense though. Plus....your spot checks aren't worth a crap.

Lilly: Oh please, when the hell am I ever going to need Spot!?

*A group of ninjas are right beside Lilly*

Buttercup the Unicorn: Ummmmm....

Lilly: It's waaaay overrated.

Ninjas: We're right here.

Lilly: My Listen Skill also sucks ass I admit.

Ninja: WE'RE RIGHT HERE DUMBASS!

Lilly: Plus, I'm now improving my Wisdom with each new attribute bonus. Plus, I have a pearl of wisdom. At that current level, I now have a Eight!

OOCharles: Which only means you're mind numbingly dense.

Lilly: Yes, but that reduces my Listen and Spot penalties considerably.

*pause*

Lilly: HOLY CRAZZAP! NINJAS!
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-22-06, 06:04 PM		Lilly: HOLY CRAZZAP! NINJAS!
Ninja Spokething: Forget it. I mean, I know we're supposed to sneak around and be unseen, but what's the point of doing that if the victim can't see us even if we crowed around him in this sort of "wall of black-clad assassins" way? We do have pride.

Random Ninja: Hey, let's go to the underdecks, I here there's a sushi joint open that's hiring. They've got a definite ninja theme going.

Another Random Ninja: You mean like ripping off Ninjaburger?

Random Ninja: Actually, they focus more on the cool moves and less on the hiding.

Ninja Spokesthing: So who's it run by?

Random Ninja: Four giant squirrels and their catfolk master.

The ninjas leave, unstealthely.

13: So, now that we've determined that Lilly has a Wisdom of 5, we can say for certain that he's dense.

Lilly: Hey! I said I'd raised my Wisdom to 8!

13: And look how that's turned out. :P Anyway, the rules clearly state that you aren't allowed to have your character act in a way inconsistant with their ability scores. So Lilly will never get any of this real paladin stuff unless you bump that up.

Silver: I vote we search every monster template until we find one that boosts Wisdom.

13: Actually I was just thinking of leaving him like this and constantly throwing challenges at him until he gains enough levels to qualify for more ability boosts.

Bunny: Or dies. :devil: Survival of the fittest.

Lilly: Why me? :(

Silver: You'd think I'd oppose this. But it cleans out the bad genes.
Charles Phipps

11-22-06, 06:47 PM		OOC: Hahahha, Oh Silver, your stuff has been great lately.

This plot with Lilly has been really bringing out good ideas from you.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

11-22-06, 06:51 PM		ash looks up from moping about having to actualy walk as Chanse enters
ASh "hats up?"
Chanse "Note from our Entity."
Ash "Whats it say?"
Chanse "Thats the weird thing, it just reads 'I ain't dead' think hes being lazy again?"
Ash "That or he got caught under the Wrighters blok again..."
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-22-06, 06:58 PM		[read above]
OOC: My talent is to point out the flaws in the multiverse. Reality takes care of the rest.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-22-06, 09:09 PM		OOC: And now, I present to you all with the first installment of:

The Way, WAY back when series!

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

IC:

Somewhere in the Eldeen Reaches, a pair of voices can be heard coming from the river. Upon closer inspection, they are coming from a half-elven boy of about 15 and an elven girl of about 14 tied on opposite sides of a large log as it floats upright in the current.

Boy: You know, this really isn't that ba-

Girl: *angry pom* I told you not to talk to me.

Boy: Come on, Terra. Don't be like that.

Terra: *pom gets bigger* :rant: Like what, Rose?! Angry that we're helplessly tied to a log as it goes who knows where? Or how about that I'm soaking wet in a freezing cold river? Or that I'm currently out of spells that don't require a somatic component because SOMEONE didn't see the harm in not resting so that I could prepare more? Or that no one knows where we are because you thought it would be fun to sneak away and do some sightseeing for a while?

Rose: Now is not the time to point fingers.

Terra: *ok, that pom's going to burst, I swear* I...hate you...!

Rose: What?

Terra: Nevermind. Do you have any spells left?

Rose: Nope, I'm tapped out. Though I do have my songs!

Terra: I'm nowhere near that desperate yet. Can you get your hands free?

Rose: Yeah.

Terra: *how much more can it take?* *through clenched teeth* Then-why-haven't-you-done-so-yet-?

Rose: I did about 15 minutes ago.

Terra: *SNAP* *breathing anime fire* WHY HAVEN'T YOU UNTIED US, THEN?!?!?!?!?!?!

Rose: Have you ever tried unbinding a knot done by a 10th level Ashbound Druid? The vines keep attacking me.

Terra: You just had to get closer, didn't you?!

Rose: You wanted to see, too, and you know it.

Terra: I didn't think even you'd be dumb enough to interrupt an initiation ceremony!

*about an hour ago*

Terra and Rose watch the ceremony from behind a bush. Rose motions to Terra to follow him as he heads for a potentially better location.

Rose: *singing* Sneak, sneak, sneak, sneak past the guards!

The entire congregation turns and looks at the pair as Terra just buries her head in her hands.

Rose: :incog:

*end secondary flashback*

Rose: How was I supposed to know my songs wouldn't work on them?!

Terra: That song never works! How many ti-...uh-oh.

Rose: :bored: Lemme guess. We're about to go over a huge waterfall.

Terra: :bored: Yep...

Rose: Sharp rocks at the bottom?

Terra: :whatsthis Most likely.

Rose: *very serious look* ...bring it on.

And...over they go.

Rose: BOOOOOOYAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-22-06, 09:26 PM		Terra: ……...uh-oh.

Rose: :bored: Lemme guess. We're about to go over a huge waterfall.

Terra: :bored: Yep...

Rose: Sharp rocks at the bottom?

Terra: :whatsthis Most likely.

Rose: *very serious look* ...bring it on.

And...over they go.

Rose: BOOOOOOYAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
OOcat: Best. Movie. Scene. Ever.

Multiverse-of-OOcats: YEAH!
Charles Phipps

11-22-06, 10:49 PM		Rose: Terra, why are you remembering our rather embarrassing past?

Terra: I was just thinking about the fact we're going to take the kids to the Shadow Marches.

Rose: The Shad.....Terra, are you out of your mind?

Terra: Why?

Rose: The Shadow Marches are the place that all the evils of the Daelkyr wars have been driven to along with the Wastes.

Terra: Oh don't be stupid. You can't tell me you're prejudiced against monsters!

Rose: No. Not by blood. However, many of the races created by the Demons and the Lords of Dust from human, elvish, and dwarven strains still worship the Dark Forces of the universe. They also crave revenge on humans for driving them out.

Terra: As well they should! I'm good friends with many of the people of Droam and they've invited me back. We're going to see the Sisters of Sora Kell.

Rose: :confused: You really don't know them very well do you?

Terra: I know them better than you! When all the world wouldn't accept me! They did!

Rose: This will not end well.

Terra: You're welcome not to come. I'm sure your Spoony Paladin will find it educational!

Rose: Actually, Lilly already has a Final Fantasy analogue.

Terra: How so?

Rose: Well he's a womanizing Paladin/Nobleman with a penchant for using machinery to help his paladin attacks.

Terra:.....EDGAR!?

Rose: Yes, that's what he'll grow up to be.

Terra: Well in any case, all of the great big evils of Eberron have proven to be big wusses. What are the chances the Hags will be any different?

Rose: About 100% now that you've called attention to it.

Terra: Well we can't go now though.

Rose: Why?

Terra: we're in the middle of a warhammer spoof.

Rose: Damnit, I KNEW I forgot something.

Terra: Huh?

Rose: Well I got distracted bedding Jarlot's girlfriend and my wife's return so I ended up forgetting to stop his evil plan.

Terra: HUH!? WHAT EVIL PLAN!?

Rose: Well, basically it's two fold. One, he summoned the Forces of Chaos to invade this Realm and then too he made a deal with the Empire to become the planet's Duke by repelling them.

Terra: NO WAY!

Rose: Yes, it does sound needlessly complicated for what amounts to a gratutious cleavage and guns D&D boardgame.
Paulon

11-23-06, 01:21 PM		Two new rules:

Nobody is to attempt to create the hybrids found listed here (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=443901).

Caralot is not permitted to allow access to her breeding records to either show that she's already done any of these or that the concepts referenced above are too unimaginative for her to bother with.
urial angel of death

11-23-06, 03:26 PM		OOUrial: Jarlot you realize that they will betray you because you're not human right?
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-23-06, 03:33 PM		Nobody is to attempt to create the hybrids found listed here (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=443901).
Caralot: And if they aren't listed there?

OOcat: Those people never even scratched the surface of bastards and bloodlines. Plus I have a info listing the crossbreeds of every PHB race.

Caralot: :D Ooooooo, gimme!
Kaizer_Ryu

11-23-06, 07:46 PM		*Limbo music is playing against a blank background*

Terra: :mad: When are they going to finish?

Rose: It's an Entity holiday that involves consumption of a bird that causes sleepiness while catching up with obscure relatives about whatever non-exciting activities they've been up to for hours on end. I'd say it'll be a while.

Kanatash: Sweet Lords of Madness!!! I can't take this music much longer!!!!

Caralot: We've only been here a few hours...

Kanatash: Only hours?!

Terra: So everyone's Entity is conked out by Tryptophane, thus changing all of our existance into nothingness.

Lisa: More or less.

Terra: Can't you three do anything?

Bunny: That would involve being useful.

13: Which we aren't allowed to be.

Silver: But I have some ideas for how to pass the time... :plotting: :devil: :evillaugh

Lisa: :rolleyes: Can't Kanatash become an Entity? And...if he's the only one present, would that be a good idea?

The world suddenly snaps back into focus.

Rose: Oooooooookay...

OOKaizer: *yawn* Sorry about that. We were planning on OOUrial taking care of the place since no one likes him, but it turns out there are people other than us who can tolerate him.

OOUrial: *emo Entity single tear*

OOKaizer: Allright then, now clear off. Do whatever it is you do while we're not looking.

Terra & Lisa: :devil:

Kanatash & Caralot: :evillaugh

Rose: *sigh* :rolleyes: As if those were unexpected responses.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-23-06, 08:03 PM		Rose: It's an Entity holiday that involves consumption of a bird that causes sleepiness while catching up with obscure relatives about whatever non-exciting activities they've been up to for hours on end. I'd say it'll be a while.
OOcat: Not all of us. I think sleepy-bird sucks.

Random Poster: Troll!!!!

OOcat: Sorry:
I think sleepy-bird is seriously lacking in culinary qualities that are found in dishes prepared by people who live in regions that have no access to it. And it's never made me sleepy.
rampant

11-23-06, 08:53 PM		Pershing - Fire!

A wave of energy miles wide slices down leaping foward to burn eberron from the cosmos.

Pershing - Die freaks.

A single mote, a flying island with a massive array of elemental ( and other ) rings, moves into its path.

Izzy - Too easy *warp shrapnel*

Blades of nothingnes intercept the blastfront shatering it and dissipating the energy.

Pershing - What the Fug just haapened?
---------------------------

Tirmek - Nice work,... for a putz.

Izzy - :P
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-23-06, 10:16 PM		Pershing - Fire!
"Wind!"

"Water!"

"Heart!"

"God God-Emperor!"

Bunny: Hold on, hold on. Based on the personalities of these Imperium people, I don't think heart factors into this.

Silver: Well which one did you think I was going to shout out? Heart beats anything, any day. :P Plus Ma-ti is sooooo cute! :D

Pershing: Who are you, and why are you mocking the majesty of the God-Emperor? :mad:

13: In answer to your second question: because you make it so easy. :rofl:
Crystalforged

11-23-06, 11:57 PM		OOC: Whatcha know, I'm not the only one alive around here. Anywho time to do some catching up...



IC: Kitten: Well, thank you mister scary armor dude for getting me back aboard the Forgotten Freedom. That was really nice of you to pick me up from the ruins of Sharn.

Ivy: It was no problem. I was looking for a familiar anyways.

Kitten: Um, I'm not sure about that. I though you said you were a bard. Bards don't have familiars. Besides its really cramped in that armor and you're sort of creepy. I'm just going to set out on my own.

Ivy: :weep: No! Don't leave me!

Kitten: Yeah, it kinda looks like you have attatchement issues as well and you're sorta clingy. Bye. (leaves)

OOCrystalforged: Sorry about that, its nothing personal, I just have plans and I need to get Kitten away from you for them to work. That said, I'm not really sure why I'm bothering to tell you this, after all you're really just a secondary character.

Ivy: :weep:

---

Outside Kitten makes her way to the bow of the ship where :coolcthul and a group of random hippies (redshirts) are gathered around John.

Kitten: (nervously) Um, hello? What are you doing.

:coolcthul : Oh, no problem dudett, we're just like listening to John here and discussing how the Corperations are destroying the planet.

Kitten: The Corperations? Tell me about them.

*One hour of rambling discussion later*

:coolcthul : ...And thats like what the coperations do, man.

Kitten: Wow, these corperations sound aughly not nice. What are we gonna do about them?

:coolcthul : I say we go boycott outside them, raise awareness, tell everyone dude! Right after I finish this joint.

*Many days and several hundred joints later*

Kitten: So are we going to go fight the coperations now?

:coolcthul : Whoa, like chill out dude, here, have a pull of this. (holds out joint)

Kitten: Alright thats it, I can't take you or the dreamlily fumes anymore, I'm leaving. (walks away)

John: You're lucky, I don't have legs, I have to listen to them all day long.
Charles Phipps

11-24-06, 12:44 AM		OOC: HHAHAHAHAHAA that was hilarious with Ivy.

And yay! A certain Squidhead is back!
Charles Phipps

11-24-06, 01:05 AM		Star Destroyer Forgotten Freedom

Emperor Jarlot: Okay, here's exactly how we're handling this.

Space Marine: We overwhelm the world with our superior space technology?

Emperor Jarlot: Oh please, that will never work.

Space Marine: Why not?

Emperor Jarlot: Because tactics doesn't work like that.

Space Marine: You mean the fact we have spaceships and can just use our air superiority to bomb the shavit out of them without any danger.

Emperor Jarlot: Would utterly ruin us.

*Jarlot gets out a gigantic box and puts it on the table*

Emperor Jarlot: No I've been preparing this plan for some time.

Space Marine: I shall gladly carry it out.

Emperor Jarlot: First I had to assemble all of the little individual figures. Help me set them up would you. That took hours to begin with. Not to mention how long it took for the god damned comic book store to purchase all of the figures I want. Yes, they have plenty of space marines but what about Imperial Battlecruisers? Not to mention the enemy figures that I had to buy myself because no one in my area could afford them but me.

Space Marine: Sir...

Emperor Jarlot: Shut up. You see this figure here? The Customized Ultra-Paladin? This is me. You can tell because I spent two hours doing the finish for his armor alone. The texture, the shading, all of it is hand crafted excellence. Can you not tell this is a labor of love?

Space Marine: Uhh..of course sir.

*three hours later of setting up and Jarlot explaining how he painted each one*

Emperor Jarlot: Okay, so basically that's the set up for the immediate battle campaign.

Space Marine: Sir, you've only put the troopers on a single board.

Emperor Jarlot: Yes, they're going to run at one another and fire while I role these dice to determine how many hits each unit takes in each engagement. That will represent the randomness factor in the battle.

Space Marine: Your tactical genius boggles me sir.

Emperor Jarlot: So basically, all the Orks...

Space Marine: You mean Orcs sir?

Emperor Jarlot: **** no! Orcs are capable of being any alignment on Eberron. Orks exist solely to stick their manhood up your anyx, wipe out civilization as we know it, and wave a jawbone to worship Chaos. It's like Drow except they're even worse baby eating bastarves. It's how every one already PLAYS Orcs but how Hasbro seems to think that their target market is kids as opposed to college students and older. Well no KID is affording these games either. That's why the books are laden with hardcore nudity!

Space Marine: Sir, I'm getting the impression you consider the lives of my men and me to be nothing more than a big board game.

Emperor Jarlot: This is not a board game, it's a way of life. Now pass me the supplement on the Lords of Chaos so I can work to invoke Khorne's blessing on these marine units there to become Chaos marines. There's a rules expansion on the internet I'm adopting that allows multi team uses.

Space Marine: Uh...huh.

Emperor Jarlot: As the last remaining direct descendent of Sigmar Heldenhammer, do what I say boy!

Space Marines: This invasion is going to be very odd....
Crystalforged

11-24-06, 01:09 AM		:D I do what I can.

By the way I wanted to mention a couple of things to keep in mind about Kitten. These aren't aimed at anyone in particular but I think they bear mentioning

1) She was raised by KANATASH and CARALOT on the FORGOTTEN FREEDOM. Like most kids she considers the environment she grew up in to be "normal" so she is often going to be clueless and confused by things others would consider mundane and she will have some very strange habits.

2) She is currently extremely idealistic. I plan to beat that out of here and then let OOCat build it back up to mild idealism.

3) Yes, she considers Kanatash her mother and Caralot her father. Technically she's correct too.

4) She knows a ridiculous amount of information about genetics and breeding from tutalage under Caralot. Kanatash has likewise schooled her in the social dealing of Xoriat and psionic lore although as of yet she has not expressed any aptitude herself.
Charles Phipps

11-24-06, 01:35 AM		And she's adorable!

Rose: And delicious!

Kitten is not MENCHI!

Yes, and pity poor Ivy. You see, he died in 2nd edition.

That's why he thought he have a familiar ;-)
rampant

11-24-06, 01:48 AM		OORampant - bards can take a feat to get a familiar at level 3

Ivy - Yay!
Crystalforged

11-24-06, 01:51 AM		Yes, she is cute beyond words. To the point where passing strangers sometimes will hug her out of nowhere. :) While she traveled Eberron Bunny has been on a varitable killing spree of people who tried to "take advantage" of Kitten and 13 got his kicks as well. Which brings another thing I want to mention...

5) Kitten has an aura of divine (or more accurately ENBE) protection about her to rival Aerith's. She seems completely immune to any sort of physical harm to the point where its likely she would not even notice if someone attempted to kill her. Its not that she's oblivious to them, its just that since no force has ever been able to cause her harm she simply doesn't comprehend what they are attempting to do.

6) Bunny, 13, and Silver all keep a watchful eye over Kitten, mostly because they answer to the OOCat, Kitten's other entity. Actually its mostly Bunny and 13 but they enact horrible vengance on anyone who might try to harm Kitten and they may be partly responsible for Kitten's divine protection.



EDIT:
IC: OOCrystalforged: Really? I didn't know that. Well pity you didn't take that feat then.

Rule-Nazi-OOCrystalforged: No familiar for you.

Ivy: :weep:

SadisticOOCrystalforged(AKA RegularOOCrystalforged): :P Your pain amuses me.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-24-06, 08:29 AM		6) Bunny, 13, and Silver all keep a watchful eye over Kitten, mostly because they answer to the OOCat, Kitten's other entity. Actually its mostly Bunny and 13 but they enact horrible vengance on anyone who might try to harm Kitten and they may be partly responsible for Kitten's divine protection.
13: Actually, Silver helps out, too. :rolleyes: You know, with pedophiles and whatnot.

Bunny: Really, she's very scary sometimes. :mymy:

Silver: It's because Caralot is one of my best creations, and Kitten could be even better. :D

Bunny: Now you wouldn't think a goddess of fertility and "associations" could do anything to punish anyone. You would be very wrong. It makes what I do look merciful.
rampant

11-24-06, 09:45 AM		Marine scout leader - OK our job is to get as much info on how they stopped our exterminus as possible.

Scout - Um sir there's a squirrel on your suit.

MSl - This is the marines turd, roadkill is irrelevant.

Scout - no sir I mean a live squirrel its putting something on the back of your suits head.

MSL - You stupid Fugger thats not something, thats a shaped charge you shi... Well I'm screwed aren't I?

Squirrel - *Hits detonater*

THe MSL's helmet explodes inward liquifying his head.
Charles Phipps

11-24-06, 10:14 AM		OOC: BTW, to clarify, I don't actually think Jarlot is Emperor and his participation in the Warhammer plot is strictly non-cannon.

I just love making fun. ;-)
Kaizer_Ryu

11-24-06, 10:25 AM		I've been thinking about doing this for ages. Thanks to Rich Burlew's OoTS for this. :devil:

IC:

Lilly and Ivy wander the halls, waiting for the next phase of the Warhammer spoof when they hear muffled talking coming from the room on the other side of the wall. Lilly puts his ear to the wall and hears:

Sarah: Hey, sis. Can you help me for a second?

Elina: Sure. What do you need?

Sarah: Can you help me take this top off?

Lilly: :mymy:

Ivy: *whispering* It's rude to eavesdrop, brother.

Lilly: *same* Shut up. You're doing it, too.

Kitten: Wow! Those are lovely!

Sarah: Oh, thanks!

Kitten: So round and flawless.

Elina: Aren't they just, though?

Kitten: How long have you had them?

Sarah: I only got them recently. They come from Momma's side.

Upon seeing them, Tirmek has wandered over to Lilly and Ivy and begun listening in as well.

Kitten: I'm surprised you don't have your own pair, Elina.

Elina: I do, actually. But they're not nearly so large. I got them from Mom.

Kerrith has decided to perch himself on Lilly's shoulders as he listens.

Kitten: Forgive me if I'm being too forward, but I must ask if I may please touch them.

Sarah: Well, OK, but please be gentle. Don't twist them or anything.

Boys: *massive nose bleeds*

Kitten: They are certainly very smooth.

Elina: *giggle*

Kerrith loses his balance from all the blood, sending the four of them crashing into the ground.

Kitten: Did you hear that?

The three of them sit in a circle, Kitten and Sarah hold a pair of large gemstones. A box sits off to the side with the lid beside it.

Sarah: I'm sure it's just the boys eavesdropping and misinterpreting our conversation about these gemstones (that Momma gave me) for something dirty.

Kitten: Ah, I see.
Charles Phipps

11-24-06, 10:39 AM		:rofl: :bounce: :heehee :pile:

:-)
rampant

11-24-06, 11:06 AM		Pershing - This is unbelievable Squirrels! Thats it Land the troops were gonna have to burn these infidels the old-fashioned way.
--------------------------------

Tirmek - Suckers

Ketty - They have no idea

both - :evillaugh
Chrys

11-24-06, 11:13 AM		D’Ducky randomly appears in the middle of a group of Space marines who are milling around a dreadnaught.

D’Ducky: Hello? What’s all this then?

Space Marine Sergeant: Gah! Spawn of Chaos fire!

The Marine all fire and after unloading a few round. They seem a bit shocked that D’Ducky is standing there unharmed.

D’Ducky: Now that was fun, why don’t you run long now.

Dreadnaught: Exterminate!

D’Ducky: I think you guy all need to get a hobby… And for the Love of all things holy stop shooting me!

They keep shooting…

D’Ducky: Right That’s it! * D’Ducky waves his hand and a about 20 large hammers appear and start to beat the marines in to submission. *

OoChrys: Chaos Hammer… you know I don’t think… never mind.
rampant

11-24-06, 11:29 AM		'Rine - Uh Ma'am You might wanna go find an army or something.

Tirmek leaps out of the bushes slaming into the first Marine then into the next bouncing down the group like a pinball from hell, hammer and warpick shattering their armor.

Ketty follows, her twin blades slipping into the open spots and ending the entire patrol before their fingers can twitch.
urial angel of death

11-24-06, 03:32 PM		A very large drop-pod slightly more armoured and decorated than the rest lands on the FF's upper deck. Out of it step Pershing, Inquistioner Hamilton, Catherine, and a few soldiers.

Hamilton: Go on little girl. So me why our commander deams you so powerful. Destroy them! *points at redshirts below*

Catherine: But I can't! The lonely is cold! It won't let me use the energy!

Hamilton: Then use his energy *lifts up Imperial Guards soldier by the neck*

Catherine: Bu- :weep:

Hamilton: Do it!

Catherine goes into a trance-like state

Soldier: :ghosted:

Catherine: *in the voice of a much older woman* Fires of the Emporer cleanse this world of the unclean ones.

Colorless fire leaps from Catherine's hands. It forms into streams that rips through the crowded decks around them. The fire liquidified any and all Eberron natives it touched, but left the Imperium soldiers completely unharmed. Soon the upper decks were cleared of FF crew members and the soldiers moved below.
rampant

11-24-06, 03:51 PM		Catherine's mindscape

Shadows - You know this is wrong

Catherine - What who's there Why can't I hear anyone else?
--------------------------------------------------------------------

Maladren - violent fools

Tirmek - I will not abide them much longer.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-24-06, 05:35 PM		Colorless fire leaps from Catherine's hands. It forms into streams that rips through the crowded decks around them. The fire liquidified any and all Eberron natives it touched, but left the Imperium soldiers completely unharmed. Soon the upper decks were cleared of FF crew members and the soldiers moved below.
Bunny: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Pershing: :confused:

Hamilton: What is the meaning of this? :mad:

Bunny: You :rofl: just used up :rofl: someone's life :rofl: to do :rofl: what we do :rofl: to them every day! :rofl:

Hamilton: Enough! (turns to the soldiers still remaining above deck) Destroy it!

The soldiers try to fire on Bunny. A black streak goes from gun to gun as they do, and each one explodes, killing the soldier.

Bunny: Yeah, ba-by!

13: Hold on, hold on. Not to be the rules-lawyer here, but doesn't that count as something useful, as interferring? I mean, we're helping Kitten, but that's not that much of an intervention.

OOcat: For people like this who are obvious morons in the worst sense of the word, we go with rule number 2.

13: I'm still not sure what taunting Cardinal Krozen has to do with this.

OOcat: It's not going to work on me. :bored:

OOC: I cannot just let these people go by. This is now war, OOcat style. :devil:
Norr

11-24-06, 05:46 PM		Squirrel Thing: ...an' sho I wen' back down again, and wannered 'round an' 'round, bu' couldn' fin' it! An' then, jus as I wa givin up, I ran shtraight into a... a shtrange room. Tha' brown mold mush wash jush everywhere!

The patron on the other side of the table snored soundly.

Squirrel Thing: An' then there wash theshe egg-like shingsh too, an' one of 'em opened up and I jush flew away ash tha wind! Or... or an... an... wossname... long shtingy thingy... shomeshing very fast! An' then I got here and thish nishe lady gave me a nishe pint o' drink an' here I am.

Erks place is alive with the usual clamor, as always the calm eye of the storm... until now. Silence steps up onto the counter and announces today is tab day. The tavern fills with disappointed sounds. Even the floor groans, but for different reasons. As Silence calls out and in depts, Squirrel Thing pours the rest of his Necropolitan down his throat and starts to fumble with his Handy Haverpouch.
At last Silence points to him.

Silence: Sa...
Squirrel thing: Thash Squirrel Shing to you mishy! Whadda I owe?

She told him.

Squirrel Thing: :twitch: :pumpkin:

Silence: Necropolitans are, like, expensive, and you got yours in a pint. Like, twice.

Squirrel thing grumbled and produced the amount owed from his tummy-pouch with an amazing dexterity for a drunk.

Silence: If it weren't, like, impossible, I'de be surprised you'd, like, have that kind of money. You don't, like, look like one of those dragon hoard adventurers.

Squirrel Thing: I don't, an' thas jush ash good. I jush sell off my food. Whish, by the way, am.. am gonna.. gonna to do righ' now, being shuddenly economically challenged an' all.

Squirrel Thing staggered out the door. The tabaround completed, Silence takes one last look at the list. One name catches her eye. If anyone'd had made a spot check, they would have noticed a faint smile. Beside it she penned in Squirrel Shing.

Squirrel Thing let the door swing shut behind him, and looked around to get his bearings. Something wasn't right. He walked down the corridor, carefully in case of traps, and tried to figure out just what was so off with this place. Then it hit him. He stared down the metal corridor with its blinking lights and strange glass-panes. The Forgotten Freedom was made of wood. Not trusting his wings, he skittered back to the door. It was gone. He tried to concentrate through the pink little clouds of booze. Door = Erks place. Erks place = wood. Wood + door = Erks place. He needed to find a wooden door.
The squirrel thing skittered away along the corridors.

Squirrel Things writeup:
Squirrel Thing
Neutral Half-homunculus Skuirid Rouge4/Spellthief2

Given Name: Santas little helper
Nickname: Elf

Squirrel Thing was originally created by a rather tame necromancer at Morgrave University for use as more than usually independent homunculus, using a live skuirid, a few obscure spells (including Regeneration and an arcanised version of Fuse Flesh), pieces from a decommissioned Expeditious Messenger, a brain found in a garbage bin and a soul no one really cared about. He later named the thing 'Santas little helper', partly out of spite and partly because of the things behavior, which may or may not say something about their relationship. This made no sense for the other wizards, until it became known that, due to a childhood gift mishap, he thought santa synonymous with the Traveller, and everyone knows santas helpers are little elves.
Elf soon proved both to be too independent and intelligent for his master to truly control, and the wizard offered him a deal.
The day Elf brought him a Staff of Power he would be free.
Elf, a clever bastard, soon located one such staff in the possession of an archmagi of the university, and recognized him as one from who he had often nicked scrolls and reagents for his master. Elf approached him with a deal.
Later that day, as the wizard studied in his quarters, a Staff of Power was dropped on the desk in front of him. Suprised and amazed, he watched as the smug half-skuirid settled on its shaft. The wizard honored their bargain.
Immediately upon release Elf, having unrestricted access to his magic for the first time in his existance, blew off three clouds of Chill Darkness in the wizards face. Of the three resulting shadow nuggets he ate the first, saved the second and rammed the third up the unconscious wizards behind.
Not five minutes later Morgrave security kicked open the door and arrested the wizard for numerous thefts, including that of the Archmages' Staff of Power. Of his peculiar homunculus there was no trace.

Squirrel Thing hates his name, and would prefer it forgotten. He usually refers to himself as Squirrel Thing.

Stats (sorta):
Chill Darkness 3/day, the source of shadow nuts
Shadow Jump
Fire seeds

Half-homunculus Skuirid metabolism: Even though he can eat 'normal' food, he cannot properly metabolise it, and need shadow nuts to sustain him. Due to his odd composition he can go without even shadow nuts for several days, though the lack of nourishment usually drives him crazy a lot sooner (try to go seven days without carbs and you will know the feeling :twitch:).

His half-homunculus nature would, theoretically, make him a living construct. So far, however, there are no indicators of this.

Squirrel thing is unusually strong for his size.

Despite his low level, Squirrel Thing is quite wealthy and has a few useful magic items, including a Haversack sized for him and a crossbow. When the food you make is worth 1000gp a piece, life is easy.

Skills: hiding and sneaking, Sabotaging stuff, looking cute (unintentionally), 'mercifully' shooting people that 'awws' him, dropping holly berry bombs on unsuspecting passersby.

OOC: feel free to use him, if you feel unsure of his personality, just PM me.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-24-06, 06:08 PM		OOcat: Looks like someone else needs to learn to loosen up.

Silver: :confused: What's a "base land speed"?

13: Per day? Hmmm, I've gotta try that out………

Bunny: So can he die? This would make more sense if it didn't say anything on the subject at all.

(OOC: Sorry, but once you post something I feel it's my duty to pick it apart. This does not mean there was anything wrong with it.)
rampant

11-24-06, 07:04 PM		Marines - Ummm theres a war on here.

Kithle - We'll worry about you when we damned well feel like it, no go away it's laundry night.

Single Emo 'rine tears
Norr

11-24-06, 07:07 PM		I'm just surprised you didn't totally disassemble it :P
I'm still slightly rulebound, hopefully that notion will find its way into a maze so I can seal the exit.

OOCNorr:
to OOCCat: I know! gimme some time, I'll pay it back.
to Silver: it's the speed he'll move at if you rip his wings off, or half that if you get him pregnant.
to 13: Yes, just like those child-safe pill jars, one of your best works.
to Bunny: I'm open for suggestions :smirk:
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

11-24-06, 07:07 PM		Fearless the Impereal Vindicare Assasin Stalked thses cchayos tainted halls. Cultists garbed in Khorned hellish crimson fell beneath his sights time and again, there only memorial the mechanical progression of his clip. He sights a tall abhuman with nondescript features and grey skin, blue light welling up around its angular, inhuman frame. Another kill, in the name of the emperor, his finger tightens, then realisation strikes. He tears off the Vindicare mask taht had been his face for 20 years.

Vindicare "Dude! I know you, we were frat brothers right? Chanse something, Chanse Random, you nearly graduated them bam! disapered like smart in Ork town. Man your a legend, why'd you split?"

Chanse "Simthy, you gave me hell as a pledge, didn't think they let you visit panets with booze."

Vindicare "Hey, cant argue with the emperor, every gun needed for the Exterminatus you know, its like all my sins were forgiven dude. Where did you go man, why'd you cut and run?"

Chanse "Well what would you do if youd slept with a Callidus, forgoten her name, lost her number and told her where you lived?"

Vindicare "Duuuude! those chicks bend in about a milion ways, lucky dog. How'd you Score with one?"

Chanse "Luck is-"

Vindicare "-One of your skills. well gota go, I'll tell the dudes back at Kapa-Omega-Sigma you said hi. Dont catch any bolter fire, and good luck when she catches you, there deploying with the second wave"
Kaizer_Ryu

11-24-06, 07:19 PM		As a rather large group of Marines enters a sizable corridor, they come across a strange humanoid female blocking their path. She looked vaguely human, except with pointed ears and had an etherial beauty and grace about her that set her apart. On top of that, a pair of white wings extended from her back, slightly illuminating the hallway. It was at this time the troops noticed that the hall had grown very dark indeed.

Terra: Leave.

Marine Captain: Kill her.

Several troops raised their weapons, preparing to fire.

Terra: *calmly* You really don't want to do that.

Slightly unnerved by her demeanor, the troops hold their fire.

Marine Captain: *raised eyebrow* And why is that? Your world has been designated for purification. Your fate is sealed.

He snaps his fingers and the troops ready to fire again.

Terra: I said you don't want to do that. Killing moronic zealots isn't my thing anymore.

The troops open fire simultaneously at this blasphemy towards their God-Emperor. She does not flinch as the hail of bullets pass through her harmlessly and disappear. At almost the same moment, the shrieks of Marines can be heard from the back of the column. Many fall dead and more are injured by a case of unintended friendly fire. The Captain calls off the firing when he sees what is going on, then stares at the strange woman.

Marine Captain: :mad: W-what did you do to my men?!

Terra: I did nothing. I told you twice not to fire. Now leave this ship and this planet.

Marine Captain: We do the God-Emperor's will! You infidels will not stop us.

Terra: God-Emperor? Pfff. You people know little of real gods. We have our own, you know. Where is this so called "God" Emperor? Hiding in his palace while you do all the work? Feasting on the spoils of your deaths? :smirk:

In a rage, more troops open fire, much to the same result as the last time. Only a few remain standing, and the Captain is hit in the shoulder before he can regain control.

Marine Captain: *clutching the wound* Who are you?

Terra: That depends on your answer to this question: Will you cease your attacks?

Marine Captain: No.

Terra: *chuckle* As I expected. Very well, I will tell you.

The hall grows even darker, until the Captain can see only himself and Terra as she aproaches.

Terra: I am everywhere, yet I am nowhere. I exist, yet I cannot be found except those who know where I am.

Marine Captain: Now you're just ripping off Pirates of the Carribean...wait...what? What did I just say?

Terra: Chaos magic. You know things you shouldn't so long as it's humorous. Now where was I? Oh, yes...

She grabs him by the collar, lifting him off the ground. As he stares into her eyes, he finds himself unable to talk or look away.

Terra: Be very afraid, little man. For when you look into the darkness...

The world goes black.

Terra: I am the one who looks back.

The sounds of moaning and crying soldiers quickly cease. The light returns after a moment to reveal the Captain's screaming face in a pool of his own blood.
rampant

11-24-06, 07:32 PM		Pershing - This is a knightmare These Primitives are tearing us apart. How are they doing this?

Tirmek - We have power of our own, just because it doesn't follow your rules doesn't invalidate it.

Pershing - How did you get in here!

Tirmek - I'm d'Tharmis Hopefully you'll run away before you learn what that means. *poof*
rampant

11-24-06, 09:06 PM		Tirmek - I really don't like this, we need weapons... Pass out the booze, and give Jarlot his flamingo back.

Sarah - That's cold

Elina - Jeeze Tirmek! check your alignment!

Maladren - ...

Tirmek - I don't want to tangle with fire girl again. Keep her busy.

Maladren - Yes my Prince.

Tirmek - I'm not the knightmare prince.

Elina - She's gon already.

Sarah - Girl up and pulled a batman!
urial angel of death

11-24-06, 09:33 PM		:

Bunny: You :rofl: just used up :rofl: someone's life :rofl: to do :rofl: what we do :rofl: to them every day! :rofl:



Hamilton: The life of an imperial guard means nothing!

Guard: :(

Hamilton: Oh you already knew it! Besides with all of these deaths her warp powers will nolonger be inhibited.
rampant

11-24-06, 09:46 PM		Tirmek - Sweet Ancestors Man! Those are your troops! You have a mandate to Protect them you're the commander for Bleeding out loud! yes they are soldiers! Yes some are gonna die! BUT DAMMIT YOUR SUPPOSED TO MAKE IT MEAN SOMETHING!

Tirmek's Twisted avatar encloses him in its shining darkness.
Gleaming thorns dripping with venom sprout from his feet and weapons.

Tirmek - KNOW THIS!! I DECLARE YOU FORFEIT!!

----------------

on a ridge that is inexplicably convinient

Doog - Fire!

Trechubuets loaded with Liquid Keelhaul kegs unleash their fury upon the Imperial positions.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-24-06, 10:09 PM		OOCNorr:
to OOCCat: I know! gimme some time, I'll pay it back.
to Silver: it's the speed he'll move at if you rip his wings off, or half that if you get him pregnant.
to 13: Yes, just like those child-safe pill jars, one of your best works.
to Bunny: I'm open for suggestions :smirk:
OOC: :OMG! :rofl: :cheer: :pint:
Dude, you get a :devil: smiley for correctly interpreting each of their motivations!
IC:
A group of marines come across Lady playing with Rashour.

Marine leader: Kill them.

A marine raises his gun to shoot Lady. Suddenly he finds the barrel crushed in the grip of a miature siege crab. Lady crawls over to his leg.

Marine: Hey, what're you—HEY, that's my suit………

Lady changes into her wasp-scorpion form and dives.

Marine: AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!! She's eating me! She's eating me—*gurgle*

Lady busts out of his chest in a direct rip-off of alien.

Several marines stare at Lady, then glance at Rashour, who's just sitting ther giggling.

Marine leader: What—hey—deserters………:mymy:…Nononononono tmenotmeAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH—

OOC: I can't do Rashour because I know what he's capable of.
********
Caralot: …and this is where we visited my world's version of Xoriat…or was that one of my E.B.N.E.'s random interior dimensions, I always get those mixed up. Can you remember, Kanatash?

Kantash: No, dear. :bored:

Caralot: Oh, well, this next slide is of this lovely spot on the Plane of Shadow or course you can't see much because it's all black but trust me it was a wonderful we met this charming couple they were both gibbering mouthers………

Marines: *zombie stare* *whimper*
********
Marine leader: What do you mean we're lost?! How can we be lost with such sophisticated positioning equipment?!

Marine: Well, the space inside this vessel doesn't see to obey any known laws of physics and……………

Marine leader: AND?!

Marine: The walls and floors keep changing! We hear a hammering noise, and when we look around everything is different! The ship is alive, I tell you, ALIVE! :crazy:

Marine leader: BULLS***! And anyone who thinks otherwise—(has just turned back to his group to notice that there is a wall where they once was)
*******
Assassin: *little sissy screams*

Awakened Dire Toilet: *crunch*
********
A group of Marines charge into Erk's Place, guns ready.

A few hours later.

Marine: What wash……what wash……we shupposhed to do………somasomasomthin'……………

Another Marine: ………………Get drunk?

*general roar of approval*

Marine: Noh………noh…………'s somethin' that the God-Empr—God-Empe—Big Gian' Head wanted us to do f' 'im………

Another Marine: :thinks: ………………………………………………………………………………………………………… …………………………………………………Get drunk?

*general roar of approval*
Charles Phipps

11-24-06, 10:18 PM		Rose: Hello Kitten.

Kitten: HI MISTER ROSE!

Rose: I was curious if you'd like to try out this new jacuzzi!

*gestures to a black kettel over a fire*

Kitten: Sure!

*Kitten happily gets into the pot*

Rose: Now to turn up the heat a bit....

*Rose reaches over to turn on the fire before he's hit by lightning*

Rose: GAH!

Kitten: Mmmmm, nice and warm!

Rose: Let me pour some scented shampoo inside for bubblebath.

*pours barbecue sauce in*

Kitten: Mmmmm smells tasty!

Rose: As well it should because I shall EAT.....

*is hit by lightning again*

Kitten: Is there a storm outside?

Rose.....strangely no.

Kitten: What were going to eat?

Rose: I wanted to know if you wanted a snack.

Kitten: Oh sure!

*Rose starts cleaning Kitten off of barbecue saucer and happily gives him some crackers*

Kitten: THANKS!

*kitten lops off*

Rose: Little do you know that you will eventually become MITTENS FOR ZE...

*is hit by lightning again*

Rose: DAMNIT! WHO IS DOING THAT!?
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-25-06, 08:08 AM		Rose: DAMNIT! WHO IS DOING THAT!?
Bunny: I'd say 13, because if a method doesn't work the first time for me I try another one. I kill people. They only get away because they can.

13: Not mine. Sure, it's annoying, but it doesn't have the subtle touch I like to apply even to merciless beatings.

Silver: And I don't do lightening.

Bunny: Then who……………

FX demon: *X-files theme*
Charles Phipps

11-25-06, 10:14 AM		Thorn: HAHAHAHA! AT LAST I HAVE YOU ROSE!

Rose: Who the hell are you?

Thorn: YOUR *EVIL TWIN*

Rose: Oh for Chri....that plots been done to death. I don't need an evil bard archrival.

Thorn: Ah ha! But I have a GOATEE.

Rose: Uh huh. Too much spooniness onboard already here thank you. Goodbye.

Thorn: Except for one fact.

Rose: Oh?

Thorn: I'm not a bard.

Rose: .....what are you then?

Thorn: I'm a Fighter/Rogue/Sorcerer with a Specialization in Enchantment Spells.

Rose: *pause*

Thorn: Yes?

Rose: Doesn't that strike you as needlessly complicated?

Thorn: Not until this moment no.

***

Lilly: Great, Dad's got another evil multiple personality.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-25-06, 11:31 AM		13: :rolleyes: Great, more ripping off of OOTS. :P

OOcat: :confused: Who was the first one?

Thorn: I protest! My contract clearly states that I'm supposed to be Rose's mask hero alt, who's comepletely not spoony.

13: Nope, doesn't say any of that.

Thorn: Huh, what………(examines contract) GAH! This says the E.B.N.E.s can do anything they want! How did you get me to sign this?

13: :bored: Thrust it at you and asked for your autograph on the dotted line.

Thorn: :weep:
cypher_zero

11-25-06, 12:31 PM		A group of marines come across Lady playing with Rashour.

Marine leader: Kill them.

A marine raises his gun to shoot Lady. Suddenly he finds the barrel crushed in the grip of a miature siege crab. Lady crawls over to his leg.

Marine: Hey, what're you—HEY, that's my suit………

Lady changes into her wasp-scorpion form and dives.

Marine: AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!! She's eating me! She's eating me—*gurgle*

Lady busts out of his chest in a direct rip-off of alien.

Several marines stare at Lady, then glance at Rashour, who's just sitting ther giggling.

Marine leader: What—hey—deserters……… :mymy:… NonononononotmenotmeAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH
Rashour’s hand extends into four sharp claws and he flies at the marine slashing at his face, then lands behind him.

Marine Leader: Wha?! (pats himself) I’m ok!

The Marine Leader turns around to see Rashour licking the blood from his claws, his fangs glistening. The ML’s eyes go wide and his head slides slowly to the floor in four sections. His body crumples to the floor a moment later.

Rashour: *giggle*

Terrek enters and sees the dead marine, then looks at Rashour and smiles.

Terrek: Good work my son. (Picks Rashour up in his arms) Now come, we must rally the armies of chaos…
.
Chrys

11-25-06, 12:41 PM		Volrath: Err… D’Ducky why did you have Chalky paint all Annihilators, Destructors, Whirlwinds and a Vindicators painted pink and puke green… and It seem you have graffitid ‘We a pretty pretty faeries’ on them?

D’Ducky: I was Bored… you would happen to know how I could get a pink tutu and a pair of glossmer wing them?

Volrath: Nope…

D’Ducky: Damn… Hey you think If Infected them with Slaadi eggs they would become Chaos Marines?

Volrath: No I just think we would have a bunch of Sladdi in Power armor…
Norr

11-25-06, 12:52 PM		Squirrel Thing staggers about the deserted corridors of the metallic castle. The booze is starting to wear off, and he doesn't like the feeling. Besides, he'd heard rumours of the strange 'Hangover' which visits unresponsible drinkers. He stumbles into a large room full of strange glass panes with things writing themselves on them. Below are a long flat iron bar with strange designs.
As he staggers forward a two men in funny-looking full-plate armor notice him.

Marine1 - What the...

Squirrel Thing - Yo man.. manns... wha.. wha.. whaddayadoininhere?

Marine2 - Spawn of Chaos! *both marines draw their bolters*

Squirrel Thing - Now thash ru.. rude. Ima... Ima looking for... for Erk plashe, y'know whereI.. I can fin' it? 's gotta wooden door.

The marines nod to each other, one of them stomps on the little abomination. When he lifts his foot, there is a small squirrel-shaped hole in the floor.

From down the hole: Squirrel Thing (echoing slightly) - AAOOUUCH! Tha' HURT. Why are you sho mean to me? :weep:

Marines - :confused:
Marine1 - That thing is abherrant! Clearly an insult to the God-Emperor. Stop playing and shoot it!
Marine2 - You crazy? This is sensitive equipment, shrapnel in here could be fatal to our operations.
Marine1 - Then plug the hole with something. By the Emperor! Your too late!

Squirrel Thing crawl out of the hole and, swaying slightly, give the marines a hard look.

Squirrel Thing - Why you hate me :weep: I just wan' out o' here an' you... you bein' MEAN :weep:

One of the marines takes a swing at him with his bolter. It connects, sending the little thing flying head first through one of the data screens. A faint voice can be heard screaming, though too low for the marines to make out anything. The little spawn stirs in the ruined screen of razor shards. The voice grow louder, more distinct. Instinctively, the marines point their guns to the abhorrent creature. It clambers to its feet, the voice now clearly coming from within the screen. Not the head Not the head Not the head Not the head! The squirrel-like thing stands in the box full of shattered glass, clutching its head. When it turns around, the marines se its red little eyes grow more intense.

Squirrel Thing - Why? WHY? Why do you hurt me? Why do you have to be so mean? Why cant you just...

The amrines took aim at him, their hardened features showing no signs of emotion save grim determination. Squirrel Thing looked back. No compassion. No mercy. They looked so... hateful... mindless... A great anger welled up inside the little beast.

Squirrel Thing - I.. hate.. you... I. HATE. YOU! I WANT YOU TO DIE!

Marines, in unison - For the God-Emperor!

Squirrel thing launched himself at one of the marines.

Squirrel Thing - THEN I HATE HIM TOO!

The abhorrent little thing moved too fast for the marines to get a lock on, and landed on one marines' collar. The marine yelled out in pain as he staggered around with the thing on his face, his buddy hesitant to shoot. At last the horrible animal detached, but the marine didn't have the time to get a shot in before it had flitted out of sight. He looked at his buddy and swore, for his face was no more than an eyeless mass of serrated flesh. The wounded marine staggered towards his buddy, gurgling something. The other marine took a step forward to help his wounded colleage, all the while keeping watch for that horrible critter. The wounded marine gurgles again, and the other one leans close to hear. In his ear the other marine wispers "Run..."
Before the other marine has time to react, the wounded marine bursts into flame. Red-hot fire streams out of every cinch in the armor, first at the feet, then quickly working its way up to the face where the round helmetless collar turns into a jet-engine, hitting the other marine straight in the face and propelling the burnt-out armor straight through the wall at the other end of the room. The marine was thrown backwards, all the while trying to extinguish himself. Finally succeeding, he runs down another corridor screaming something about faces.

When the sound died down, Squirrel Thing sailed down from his perch and landed on the control panel. He glanced at the charred hole i the wall. Holly berry bombs may be a 5-ft burst, but when there is only one opening... well. He looked at the screens, hopefully there would be a wooden door somewhere around here, he had to figure out a way to get out of this odd dungeon. On one of the screens was a storage area with large drop-shaped crates. He watched as people walked into one before it closed. A hatch opened, revealing a black starry sky outside and an odd moon with a lot smaller ones around it. Then he realised. The invasion. This must be one of those big ships circling the planet.
The skuirid thought for a while. He had two choices; get in a pod and get back home, or sabotage something vital and blow the ship up. There had to be a compromise here.
A grin spread on his face. Of course. This would be so much more fun.
The squirrel thing loosened some of the buttons on the control panel and inserted pressure-sensitive holly bombs under them before putting them back. Technology. So much can go wrong with technology :D

---

Volrath: No I just think we would have a bunch of Sladdi in Power armor…

D'Ducky: :plotting: hmm, now thats a good idea!
Norr

11-25-06, 01:34 PM		A marine and his group of imperial guard has managed to gain access to the underworks. Suddenly one of their scouts return. Running.

Scout: My Feet! My feet are on fire!

Marine: Halt soldier! Report!

The panicked scout continue running toward them.

Marine *hoists his bolter*: I said Halt soldier!

*glorp*

Scout: It buuurns! It buuurns!

The marine takes aim for the scouts head when the scout suddenly stops, just a few feet in front of the marine. The scouts feet are covered with some kind of red goo which slowly eats away at them. The scout is visibly straining to block out the pain.

Marine: Report!

*glorp*

Scout *delirious*: Sir! It's the food Sir! It's coming for revenge Sir! I shoud've taken the chicken Sir! It's coming Sir! It's the food Sir! It's coming for revenge Sir! I shoud've taken the chicken...

Marine *cutting him off*: Your raving soldier! Take yourself together, or I swear by the divine Emperor I will shoot you!

*glorp*

Scout: It's right behind us Sir! We have to run Sir! RUN!

The marine places a bullet between the scouts eyes. He turns to the rest of the squad.

Marine: Okay soldiers, now do you see what happens to the weak willed!?

*glorp*

The imperial guardsmen has a look of horror on their faces, many take a step backwards.

Marine: Good! Now, follow me, we're going to find whatever killed our scout and give it what it deserves! Move Out!

The soldiers start to move away from him, the look of horror is is on everyones face. One or two men drops their guns.

Marine: Pussies! Do not even think of going AWOL on me! I...

*glorp*

The marine looks behind him and sees a red mass pour into the corridor, it has already absorbed the scout into its hot-chilli form, deliciously parting and browning the little bits of meat and dissolving everything else.

Chilli: *glorp*:drool:

The marine runs. As he rounds a few corners he catches up with the rest of his squad. They all salute. One man steps forward.

Corporal: Your order of tactical retreat has been executed Sir! We have built barricades and are ready to face the threat Sir!

Marine *dries the sweat off his face*: That is not necessary corporal, I have new orders for you.

The squad looks on nervously.

Marine: We are to proceed this way *points further down the corridor, away from the chilli* and eradicate any and all impure souls we encounter! Are We Clear!?

Squad: Sir, Yes Sir!

Marine: Move Out!

OOC: If anyone want to take their tour into the abberation decks, be my guest :gel: :smirk:
Kaizer_Ryu

11-25-06, 01:41 PM		As urial reminded me, these little ****'s are all over the planet. Let's see how they're faring, shall we?

*****

Argonessen

Mmmm, smells like someone's barbecuing.

...

...

Oh, right. No problems there.

*****

Riedra

With the Psionic surpression, the few remaining Inspired are being Uber Pwnzored to the face. The rest of the populace, being a bunch of mindless sheep, are virtually helpless. But no one cares about them.

The Tyranid forces in the area seem to be faring rather well.

*****

Adar

The dirty hippie Kalashtar have convinced both sides to lay down their arms and "meditate" to achieve "enlightenment". They have also convinced them to aid in their fight against The Man...as soon as they finish this next joint. The white clouds can be seen for leagues around.

*****

Xendric

The Tyranids have made quite a few friends amid the jungle horrors, and the Imperial forces...well...

You don't want to know.

Just keep running.

Because it's a trap.

ESPECIALLY if it doesn't look like one.

*****

Aerenel

The Imperium and Tyranids seem to care very little for this island nation of creepy death cultists. The Deathless feel neglected and sulk in the corner.

*****

Frostfell

You're kidding, right? You actually care? Because they don't.

*****

Khorvaire

Ok, now we're getting somewhere. Aundair keeps surrendering to whatever side looks like it's winning at the time. The Druids of the Eldeen Reaches have decided to tolerate the Tyranids at Terra's behest in order to drive off the Imperium. The Shadow Marches, what was once the Demon Wastes (now covered in jungle due to a certain group of pirates), and Droaam decidedly favor the Tyranid forces. King Steve of Breland has declared both sides are just figments of his advisers imaginations, while most of Sharn yawns at events that happen to them whenever the FF is nearby. Zilargo is being ignored (no one wants to deal with a bunch of dirty, dirty Gnomes). The Dhakanni of Droaam are whining about how, if they were in charge, none of this would have happened, while the rest of the tribes just ignore them.

The Elves of Valenar are attacking the Tyranids, but the Tyranids either ignore them or consider them a tasty snack with a bit of an edge to it. The Talenta Halflings have managed to gain several Tyranids as mounts, and are busy celebrating "Marine Stomping Day". The dwarves of the Mror Holds keep trying to figure out if they can profit from this. Q'Barra has broken out in civil war, but no one cares. One group of Lhazaar pirates is continually raiding Imperial positions, looking for "a compass that doesn't point north" as well as a key that matches that of an imprint on a piece of parchment. One Marine reported an overly eccentric Pirate wondering where the "thump-thump" was after he broke his jar of security dirt.

Neither side wants anything to do with the Mournlands, though Inquisitor Hamilton thinks it's funny to place bets on how long a group of Imperial Guards (i.e. Warhammer Redshirts) will last in there. Karrnath strikes both sides as far to goth-creepy to bother with.

And now to Thrane. Cardinal Krozen has sealed himself in Flamekeep, leaving the rest of the country mostly leaderless. Queen Diani has stepped in to fill the gap, but many within the CotSF do not recognize her as a legitimate authority. Even though the Marines are destroying villages, the Flamers keep attacking the Tyranids, calling them abominations, and Diani's calls to focus on the strange humans first goes against most of the Paladin's natural instincts.

This has been a special update brought to you by The Entity Broadcasting Corporation in conjunction with 4th-Wall Repair and Maintenance, Inc. (who else stands to make more money from our activites? ;) ), proud sponsors of:

Dragonmeat Den. 50% off if you kill it yourself. Kids eat free. All you can catch buffet on Kolday, Bolday, Araday, and Dornday.
urial angel of death

11-25-06, 04:14 PM		*****

Adar

The dirty hippie Kalashtar have convinced both sides to lay down their arms and "meditate" to achieve "enlightenment". They have also convinced them to aid in their fight against The Man...as soon as they finish this next joint. The white clouds can be seen for leagues around.

*****


Imagine what happens when a Tyranid get the munchies :eek:



Xendric

The Tyranids have made quite a few friends amid the jungle horrors, and the Imperial forces...well...

You don't want to know.

Just keep running.

Because it's a trap.

ESPECIALLY if it doesn't look like one.


IT'S A TRAP!!!




Frostfell

You're kidding, right? You actually care? Because they don't.

*****



*puts away his copy of frostburn* :(



The Elves of Valenar are attacking the Tyranids, but the Tyranids either ignore them or consider them a tasty snack with a bit of an edge to it.


Kind of like sweet-tarts(tm)


The Talenta Halflings have managed to gain several Tyranids as mounts, and are busy celebrating "Marine Stomping Day".


And inspired a planeswalking songwriter.


Q'Barra has broken out in civil war, but no one cares.


We just want attention! Is that too much to ask! :weep:


One group of Lhazaar pirates is continually raiding Imperial positions, looking for "a compass that doesn't point north" as well as a key that matches that of an imprint on a piece of parchment. One Marine reported an overly eccentric Pirate wondering where the "thump-thump" was after he broke his jar of security dirt.


They are also waiting very impatiently for a sequal. Though they have yet to reach Starcraft levels of appriehention.


Neither side wants anything to do with the Mournlands, though Inquisitor Hamilton thinks it's funny to place bets on how long a group of Imperial Guards (i.e. Warhammer Redshirts) will last in there.


The odds go up geometrically and are measured by the second.


And now to Thrane. Cardinal Krozen has sealed himself in Flamekeep, leaving the rest of the country mostly leaderless. Queen Diani has stepped in to fill the gap, but many within the CotSF do not recognize her as a legitimate authority. Even though the Marines are destroying villages, the Flamers keep attacking the Tyranids, calling them abominations, and Diani's calls to focus on the strange humans first goes against most of the Paladin's natural instincts.


More food for us. ;)


Dragonmeat Den. 50% off if you kill it yourself. Kids eat free. All you can catch buffet on Kolday, Bolday, Araday, and Dornday.

*in tiny print* No refunds.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-25-06, 04:42 PM		OOC: First, I would like to take this opportunity to say this:
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
Riedra

With the Psionic surpression, the few remaining Inspired are being Uber Pwnzored to the face. The rest of the populace, being a bunch of mindless sheep, are virtually helpless. But no one cares about them.

The Tyranid forces in the area seem to be faring rather well.
Multiplanar Animé Fan: Whoa! Hey, guys! They're doing some sort of cosplay over here!

Another Multiplanar Animé Fan: Which one do you think it is?

(OOC: Get it? Because Sarlona is supposed to be Aisa and—aw, forget it. :raincloud )
……Even though the Marines are destroying villages, the Flamers keep attacking the Tyranids, calling them abominations, and Diani's calls to focus on the strange humans first goes against most of the Paladin's natural instincts.………
OOcat: Hmmmmm………to save Thrane or not to save Thrane, that is the question.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-25-06, 04:57 PM		Marine: We are to proceed this way *points further down the corridor, away from the chilli* and eradicate any and all impure souls we encounter!……
A few minutes later:
2nd marine leader: Wer'n't we sthuppothed to do thomethin'?

Random Marine: ………………………………………Get drunk?

*general roar of approval*
OOC: If anyone want to take their tour into the abberation decks, be my guest :gel: :smirk:
A group of marines comes running down the hall, screaming. They are pursued by an Avatar of Tink-Winky.
rampant

11-25-06, 05:14 PM		Catherine's mindscape

Shadows - I want you to meet someone.

Catherine - Who?

Shadows - A friend of mine

Catherine - why?

Shadows - Because he's friendly.
Crystalforged

11-25-06, 05:46 PM		OOC: You know, I was just thinking, Catherine is oddly reminiscent of Nemesis. They both have psionic powers, they both have voices in their heads, and they are both very disturbing and disturbed little girls.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-25-06, 06:00 PM		OOC: You know, I was just thinking, Catherine is oddly reminiscent of Nemesis. They both have psionic powers, they both have voices in their heads, and they are both very disturbing and disturbed little girls.
OOC: Except we've yet to see Cathrine's really warm and fuzzy side because she's working for the Jerk Squad. And yes, Nemesis had a warm and fuzzy side, it was just a perpetually annoyed ball of claws and teeth.
rampant

11-25-06, 06:12 PM		And yes, Nemesis had a warm and fuzzy side, it was just a perpetually annoyed ball of claws and teeth.

What does Fluffy have to do with it?
------------------------------------------

Dorvos - hmmmmmmmmmmm

Satnak - I was worried that he might have inherited my inability to sing.

Serene - A right little singer aren't you.
---------------------------------------------

13 - Where's silver?

Bunny - I don't want to know
Crystalforged

11-25-06, 06:46 PM		Kanatash: (floating out of the floor not far from a group of marines) You know it really says something about us when we have to find someone from another planet to attack us.

Captain: Hostile spotted! Open Fire!

Kanatash: (bullets passing through him) And stupid enemies at that. Come on now, I'm see through and I pass through walls, did you really expect bullets to hurt me? Thats just pathetic. So pathetic I'll give you another free shot.

Captain: High explosives! Now! (large explosion)

Kanatash: (drives away the smoke with a wave of the hand) :schemes: My turn now. *snaps fingers*

An interminensional rift appears under the marines and they all fall into it.

---

Captain: Sergent, status report. Where are we?

Sergent: I'm sorry sir, all our equipment is malfuntioning. It just shows a blue screen with a small caption in the corner reading "presented by Bunny." No clue what that means sir.

Grunt: He have alien creatures approaching at 12:00! They appear to be small, bear shaped, with some sort of symbol on their stomachs in a variety of hues.

Captain: Open fire, destroy the spawn of chaos!

*Marines open fire*

Carebear Leader: (not particulary bothered by the gunfire) Aw, it looks like they don't want to be our friends.

Carebears: Aw.

Carebear Leader: So lets make them our new inside friends!

Carebears: Yeah! Inside friends, inside friends!

*horrible slaughter ensues*
urial angel of death

11-25-06, 09:37 PM		Unfortunately for the Tyranids in Thrane the paladins did not turn away from their fear of the aberrations. This is not to say that fear of daelkyr things is a bad thing it could save your life, but the hatred for aberrations in exclusion of other enemies is harmful to oneself. The space marines were able to set up artillary batteries and missle platforms to the ground. Thus the Tyranids' greatest fear to ever exist was brought to the battlefield, weapons with AP! (warhammer 40k joke) Suddenly to tides of the land battle turned as hundreds of thousands of Tyranids were wiped from the face of the earth by giant waves of missle fire.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-25-06, 10:00 PM		…………………
OOcat: *sigh* Better help Thrane before the marines really dig in.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-25-06, 10:15 PM		OOKaizer: I have the best idea ever! The Missile batteries are powered by computers and such, correct?

John: Uh-oh. I know where this is going.

OOKaizer: All we need is an EMP!

Rose: You are not Captain! I don't care if you control all of existance. It's my ship and my WMD! Get your grubby hands off it!

John: :weep: But I have to cast it. :weep:

OOKaizer: Fine, fine, Spoony. Just get on with it.

Rose: *assumes dramatic pose* John! Bigby's Crushing Tactical Nuke! Target: The main Marine battery! Set to explode just above their position for maximum radius on the EMP!

John: :weep: *casts*

KWAPUGAFWABLAM!

An enourmous crater now exists where the Imperial command post used to be, along with a great deal of the missile batteries. All others within 100 miles cease functioning as their controls are fried beyond repair.

OOC: Booyah.
rampant

11-25-06, 10:41 PM		Catherine's mindscape

Tirmek - Hello

Catharine - You're the enemy commander!

Tirmek - But not your enemy.

Catharine - ...

Shadows (maladren) - We are within your mindscape he cannot hurt you here.

Tirmek - ( i really wish it was that simple ) I want to know why?

Catharine - Why what?

Tirmek - Why do you want to hurt us? what did we do that was so offensive?

Catharine - I don't have to tell you anything! When Pershing gets here he'll -

Tirmek - Be hurt! do you want that? Take a look around your forces are being anihilated! How long can you sustain these losses another month maybe? Don't count on it, my aunt gets back in less than a week and when that happens YOU ALL DIE!!! You know Pershing's precious god-emporer? Even if he was ten times as great as everyone says he is, thats NOTHING!!! My father was a real god, and he was defensless against Satnak's power. You think your measly ships will protect you against a warrior who tore down the Seventh Dark?! Your exterminus is useless, the troopers are being hammered, and we can reach any ships close enough to use traditional weapons. Why are you seeking our lives? Why are you making us destroy you!?
-----------------------------------------------

Squirrel Admiral of the 8th fleet - Squeek Squeaken Rup!

An armada of thousands of ships fills the sky, as the rise from their bays on the hull of the FF many varieties can be decerned: Agile Wraiths, Plodding Archangel class Carriers, Intimdating Super Star destroyers, and leading the charge are Harrington Class Super-Dreadknaughts.

Of course some of the effect is lost when you realize that even the mighty SD's are no more than 1000 feet in diameter.

Regardless the squirrel fleet rises to meet the Imperium.
Paulon

11-25-06, 10:49 PM		Deep in the bowels of the Forgotten Freedom, in territory where even the abberations fear to tread, a squad of marines stumbles into a vast chamber seemingly illuminated by sunshine. Hedges, topiary and flowerbeds with brilliant flowers are spread out in an abstract and pleasant design, all surrounding an ornate white structure in the center of the pattern. The sounds of birds are heard, and bees fly around some of the flowers.

Oblivious to the pleasant surroundings, the marines advance cautiously towards the structure, using hedges for cover in their passage. Saving the noise of their own passage, silence hangs over the area from the moment the marines ignore the borders of the flowerbeds, trampling the gardens underfoot. But nothing untoward happens.

The leader detaches two men to investigate the structure. Open to the air on four sides, composed of white latticework and roofed to provide pleasant shade within, there seems little danger. But as the lead man steps in, he spies a movement in the shadows of the roof above. And fires.

"Just a shadow," he reports. "There's nothing here but a gazeb- oh sh-.

The creaking of wood almost covers the sounds of crushing armour and rending flesh. And shortly all is as it was, the gazebo in the center of the garden, the birds singing and the bees buzzing. But several of the flowerbeds seem just a trifle higher, and the flowers therein almost seem to resemble the faces of screaming men. But surely that's just a trick of the light?

[OOC: I just couldn't resist using the Dread Gazebo. Where else would you find it but on the Forgotten Freedom?]
Crystalforged

11-25-06, 11:31 PM		Kanatash: (telepathically to the crew) Oh, by the way everyone, when this is over if Pershing is still alive, I want him. I have an idea for him that is too horrible to put into words. Worse than Carebears, worse than telletubbies, possibly worse than anything I have ever done before.
Charles Phipps

11-26-06, 12:36 AM		Rose walked simply up to the Space Marine Commander as he was immediately taken hostage by them.

"You made a stupid mistake coming here," Marshall Stygia said as he curled his mustache. "The Empire will show you a fair trial for your resistance but you will certainly hang for the crime of treason."

Rose didn't want to point out he'd never sworn allegiance to the Empire.

"I wouldn't doubt you Commander. I simply wanted to negotiate a possible withdrawal for your forces," Rose replied.

"BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" The Commander laughed uproarously "We are the EMPIRE you stupid....what are you anyway?"

Rose said "I'm a class 20 Bard. Which means that I'm pretty much the greatest negotiator on this planet right now."

"The Empire covers the entirety of the Void fool mortal. We have crushed the heresy of Horus, fought against the creatures of the Rift, and laid waste to every planet we've come across. We wield 40,000 years of technology and are have stood against all opponents. What possible thing could you offer us that would make our withdrawal remotely plausible?" Marshall Stygia sneered "The very fact you've faced down a battallion is a tiny victory and if you somehow survive the rest of our forces then we'll just reduce this planet to the Stone Age from orbit."

"We're already Medieval," Rose pointed out.

"SHUT UP!" The Marshall snapped "The Empire takes what it wants!"

Rose then pulled out his Bag of Holding as he said "The contents inside of this bag will be quite different than what you expect from this planet. I can assure you."

The Marshall snapped up the Bag then and opened it foolishly before Kitten popped her head out and plopped onto the table before the master computers.

"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT *THING*?!" The Marshall ordered his men to point their assault rifles at her. "It's....NIGHTMARISH!"

"Hello!" Kitten waved her non-euclidean geometry paw.

Rose said "That's Kitten. She's a typical example of some of the many finer inhabitants of the planet Eberron. I suggest you focus your censors roughly forty miles beneath the planet's surface. You'll find some interesting surprises about it."

The Marshall stared at the horrible thing that invoked feelings long repressed inside him. The urge to....touch...and....snuggle...the elder horror was powerful inside him. It was as pure a creature of Chaos as he'd seen in his 40years in the service.

Communications Officer Abyss said "Sir, we've got Chaos Sign!"

The Marshall said "How bad is the infestation?"

Communications Officer Abyss said "Sir, it's.....it's like nothing I've ever seen before. There's entire ARMIES of Chaos trapped underneath the system and there seesm to be some kind of gigantic WARP gate in the center of the planet instead of a standard core!"

The Marshall spun around "What kind of trickery is this!? Is this a trap of the heretics!?"

Rose said "Not at all. That black core you sense is Khyber. One of the Lesser Gods I believe of Chaos. Possibly a Greater God but I don't know your ranking system. It's dormant form is sleeping inside the heart of our planet while surrounding it is the vast armies that were driven back to our planet by the continent of dragons on our world."

The Marshall said "Dragons?"

Rose said "That may explain why you've had trouble in that region. They're bound by barely holding special seals that keep the massive creature from being awoken along with all of its grand minions. Should these seals be disturbed then they will likely pour out of the planet's surface and then enter space to join the fight against the Empire."

The Marshall paled then returned to blustering "We can destroy the planet! Achieve a great victory against Chaos."

Rose snorted "They're not sleeping. They're waiting for something just like what you're doing. Kitten is also an expert in Chaos creatures, aren't you Kitten."

The Kitten said "Yah! I know lots of cool stuff."

Rose gestured for them to look up the cerebral system for download to their computers.

Rose said "You'll find more information about fighting the forces of Chaos downloaded from her little brain than you will from 40,000 years of your glorious history. We've been fighting the war directly for TWENY THOUSAND years. You're interfering with that and the forces of an additional god to the armies of Chaos and her minions will probably throw the delicate little detente you've established into utter retreat and withdrawal. You're barely able to hold the balance now."

The Marshall's mouth went dry. "What do you want from us?"

Rose said "Leave now and never come back. Wipe the information about this planet from your database and destroy all references to it. Go back to fighting your war against Chaos and devote your efforts to doing some good for the human race. Furthermore, maroon any space marines already here. We've lost so many that we need people experienced in fighting evil to rebuild the damage we've done."

The Marshall shook his head. He also knew it was the only way to avoid gaining a reputation as a failure. "How will we cover up their loss?"

Rose said "They died in a navigation error. You executed the navigator for their punihsment."

The Marshall nodded then said "Prepare....for...withdrawal."

The Communications officer said "But sir....Pershing..."

The Marshall said "Pershing will never retreat. He'll never admit defeat either. We're simply leaving him to his own devices."

Rose said "He won't be leaving this planet. I can assure you."

OOC: Why influence reactions and maxed diplomacy is awesome. ;-)
rampant

11-26-06, 01:09 AM		Satnak - Does this mean I don't get to terrorize an interstellar empire, and kill their precious god-emperor on a live feed?:weep:

OORampant - Sorry:( There's still clean up and 'nids though.

Satnak - It's not the same.

Serene - I have a better idea *whisper* cat girl costume *whisper* and a *whisper* whipped cream.

Satnak - :devil:

OORampant - I'm gonna leave before I have more character intros to write. *turns to leave* hurk!

Silver - Not so fast punk.
Charles Phipps

11-26-06, 01:13 AM		Rose- Well look at the bright side, the Forgotten Freedom has a Spelljammer helm.

Satnak: :schemes:

OOC: Hope everyone enjoyed the little bit with Rose and Marshall Stygia. I was quite proud of it and was worried it might be out of place.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-26-06, 01:13 AM		OOC: Dude. That was EVIL. Me likey. :devil:

And since the remaining troops aren't likely to give up easily, what I was typing when that was posted is thankfully still relevant. *sigh of relief*

IC:

On the outskirts of Flamekeep, Queen Diani rallies what forces she can muster against the Imperium. The volley that took out most of the Tyranids snapped many out of their fervor, and slowly but surely, her forces were increasing. Malik Otherro and his troops were holding their own outside of Daskaran, and Dzarro Silversteen was stubbornly defending Sigilstar, but many had been killed or wounded by the foolish fight against what could have been allies in the Tyranids and the aftermath of the Imperium's attack. She was not a warrior. Her primary duties were governace, not war. So it was with great relief that she noticed a certain red-headed Paladin appear in a flash of light.

Lisa: Mother!

Diani: *hug* My darling Lisa. I'm so glad to see you!

Lisa: We can catch up later, Mom. First we need to organize our troops for a counterattack. The Nuke has the Imperium scattered in this area, but not routed. I need troop numbers, equipment specs, a layout of the terrain, and reports on enemy positions ASAP.

Diani: :) Spoken like a born leader. It's too bad you don't want to succeed the crown. I couldn't imagine anyone better.

Lisa: Please, Mom.

Diani: Sorry.

Sarah & Elina: GRAMMA!!!! *TACKLE*

Diani: :D Oof! Hello, dears! What are you doing here?

Elina: Helping, duh!

Sarah: The rest of the crew is handling the ship and the fleet, we're gonna help take on the ones already on the ground.

Diani looks at Lisa with a mixture of confusion and disbelief.

Lisa: Don't look at me like that. They've seen more combat than many of the recruits here. They're stronger than perhaps an entire brigade of the regulars. Not to mention the psychological effect on our troops of being outdone by a couple of ten year olds. If that doesn't motivate them to fight harder, I don't know what will.

Diani: *still doubtful* How does your wife feel about sending your children into a war zone?

Terra: :smirk: What do you think the Forgotten Freedom is?

Terra forms out of the shadows nearby.

Terra: Good to see you again.

Diani: I still wish you wouldn't do that.

Terra: :D But it's so much fun. On top of my own support, I'm bringing in two more.

A portal opens up, and Gregory and Lilly step out. Buttercup the Unicorn follows close behind. (OOC: :rofl: )

Gregory: :eek: My Queen! It is an honor! *bows*

Lilly: :rolleyes: Suck up.

Diani: *sigh* Two child Paladins, another, excommunicated Paladin that is actually the best one we have, her Demonic Angel wife, and their impossible daughters. I know in all likelyhood how strong you all are, but are you sure you can convince everyone else of it?

Terra: Oh, very much so.

*five minutes later*

The troops have fallen into battle formation without question and without complaint. Watching just the children take down two dozen stupidly brave Marines in less than a minute shut them up in a hurry. They hadn't even seen what Terra could do, but they didn't need to. With Wind Wall firmly in place to protect from the bullets, the Paladins, Clerics, Adepts, and Redsh-I mean...regular troops prepared to rout what remained of the enemy positions.

Sarah: (i.h.h.) This is SO COOL!! Ok, remain calm. Momma said not to get over excited so I don't distract the troops.

Elina: (Inner Elina) :bounce: :dancin: (outside) What's next, Momma?

Lilly: Smite them all!!! *thunk* Ow...

Lisa: *to the troops* If they surrender, disarm them and take them prisoner. If they try to return from whence they came, let them. We are not here to massacre. We are defending our home from an enemy that wishes to annilalate us, yes, but they do so because they are led to believe it is the right thing. We shall take the high road and show them that, while we will not tolerate aggression, we are not merciless savages. And one last thing. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT attack the Tyranids. Abominations though they may be, they are not our enemies at this time. Once the Imperium is gone, they will leave.

A few hours ago, this command would be grounds for mutiny. But having seen what happened, no one objected. Up in the air, three figures watched as the final orders were given and the battle began.

Lilly: :( Do I have to ride the girly horse?

Buttercup: :mad: Hey!

Terra: Unicorns are perfectly acceptable mounts.

Lilly: But it's girly!

Buttercup: :mad: I'm RIGHT HERE!!

Terra: *sigh* Think about it like this. If you can be comfortable in your manliness while riding a unicorn, people will have to start respecting you.

Lilly: Will chicks dig me?

Terra: :doh:

Rose- Well look at the bright side, the Forgotten Freedom has a Spelljammer helm.Squishy: *annoyed screech* :mad: WHEN WERE YOU GOING TO INFORM ME OF THIS?!?!?!
Charles Phipps

11-26-06, 01:50 AM		Deck of the Forgotten Freedom

Ivy: Brother! Where are you going?

Lilly:I'm going to Flamehold.

Ivy: Ummm.....why?

Lilly:I need to consult with the Flame.

Ivy: Isn't that Sakura's job?

Lilly: She's spending too much time with Parn to spend time SAVING
HER COUNTRY.

Ivy: Isn't Parn just the Elinverse version of you?

Lilly: Oh please! Do you think I go for hot teenage Half-Reidran
schoolgirls with supernatural powers!?

Ivy: Is this a trick question?

Lilly: I have to go save the land from evil.

Ivy: Errr brother...by EVIL...who exactly do you mean?

Lilly: Why of course I mean the FILTHY FILTHY Tyranaids.

Ivy: Oh sweet Arrawai brother ARE YOU THAT DENSE!?

Lilly: What?

Ivy: THE EMPIRE IS INVADING! THEY'RE HERE TO WIPE US OUT! They'll do what they did to us as to what the Great War did to Cyre!

Scar: We the Mourners have suffered tremendously for the evils of Alchemy.

Ivy: Oh you shut up!

Lilly: I've never seen you this angry before Ivy.

Ivy: You're damn right I'm angry! We didn't do anything to them and they're killing our people for no reason other than to just put their prescious flag over us! That's wrong! It's EVIL!

Lilly: Your neutral good shines though Iv.

Ivy: We can't let them win.

Lilly: It's not like fighting the undead or the Daelkyr abberations
though Iv. These are HUMANS though. Fellow humans who want the same
thing I want. Peace, Order, a chance for innocent people to live without fear
of the monsters. That's good isn't it?

Ivy: Those ideals are good but they're slaughtering everyone that refuses to agree with them. THAT, brother, is EVIL.

Lilly: And it's a paladin's job to destroy evil! OF COURSE!

*he leaps over the side*

Ivy: Can't you wait to get a flying boat? And...wow....convincing him was a lot easier than I expected.

Lilly: FEATHER FALL! FEATHER FALL! MUST CAST FEATHERFALL!

Ivy: Oh crap! I forgot to get his token replaced!

Gregory: Don't worry laddie, Buttercup will save her and we can WARP him there with magic.

***

Flamehold
The Chamber of the Flame

Cardinal Kronzen: So it has last come down to this.

Tira Mirron: Your heart was always twisted by evil. When Sutekh was still trapped inside me, that was capable of being covered up. Now, I am free of the corruption and you are revealed nakedly for the scheming villain you are.

Cardinal Kronzen: Am I?

Tira Mirron: You have driven away Sakura jaela and left yourself in charge of the Church. All of the true clerics in the faith have been removed from their position and replaced by your toadies. All those whom once believed are gone. This place is unholy.

Cardinal Kronzen: I know. They've started to notice the loss of clerical magic in the land. However, it won't be a problem anymore because I've found a NEW FAITH to guide them.

Inquisitor Khan: I am pleased you are willing to aid us in the mass conversions.

Cardinal Kronzen: I've already signed the death warrant for Queen Danni and her lover. Very soon, Thrane will be the vanguard of a new Impergium outpost in the land.

Tira Mirron: The pen is mightier than the sword. The Empire has withdrawn its forces from Eberron and marked it accursed as the home of Chaos.

Cardinal Kronzen: That means nothing my dear. There's twenty LEGIONS of troops in Thrane alone. As the leader of the invading armies, I will draw them to this country and declare myself God Emperor of Thrane.

Inquisitor Khan: Our religion is very...flexible.

Cardinal Kronzen: With their weapons and technology, I will outfit our forces and we will rush through to conquer the remaining forces of Karrnath, Valenar, Talenta, Droam, Dargunn, and the Mror holds. Aundair will kneel before us willingly and I shall be the head of not only a United Galifar but Reidra as well. From there Lhazaar. I won't see a united world in my lifetime but....I don't think that's a large problem.

Tira Mirron: It had been my hope you'd learn from the torture you endured.

Cardinal Kronzen: I learned I should have slit that little b*** Lisa's throat when she was born.

Tira Mirron: You will fail.

Cardinal Kronzen: I think not. Inquisitor! Set up the Imperial Summoning Circle!

Tira Mirron: What are you doing?

Cardinal Kronzen: The flame is a physical manifestation of the Light just as the Void gates are the manifestation of Chaos. That means it is a living battery for clerical magic. I'm going to use their science to harness the flame to subdue the Tyranaids in one stroke.

Tira Mirron: If you weaken the power of the Flame even one iota, you run the risk of releasing all the Rajahs.

Cardinal Kronzen: I'll just take that chance.

***

Space Marines: There's another Robot! BLAST IT!

Ivy: No wait! Don't! My armor has been improved with Adamantine feat and...

*BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM*

Space Marines: GUHHhhh!
*they all lie dead from richochette shots*

Ivy: I took the reflective armor graft....

Lilly: You know, this wasn't as heroic as I expected it to be.

Space Marine: DIE ABOMINATION!

*Space Marine fires assault rifle at Lilly and Buttercup, they are unharmed*

Lilly: I cast Protection from Normal Missiles dumbutt. I'd like to offer you a chance to surrender...

Space Marine: FOR THE EMPIRE!

*Space Marine fires again to no effect*

Lilly: *sigh* Magic Missile.

*Space Marine dies*

Ivy: It's weird how all they say is "FOR THE EMPIRE!", "Orders Sir?", and "MY LIFE FOR THE EMPEROR!"

Lilly: We must be facing Warhammer Online Trooper legions.

Ivy: Well that's another unit eliminated.

Gregory: Ah, this a glorious day for battle against the Forces of Evil!

Ivy: You're soaked in blood. We're killing fellow humans and there's nothing indicating this battle is going to end ANY time soon. Even if we win, we're going to be spending months wiping out all the pockets of resistance and that'll mean Thrane will be utterly wrecked!

Gregory: This is the life of a Palad.....*a glossy look to his eyes*

Ivy: The hell.

Gregory: Kronzen is my master.....the Needs of the Many are Outweighed by the Needs of Kronzen....Kronzen is my master.

Ivy: Oh crap.

Lilly: The Hell!?

Jarlot: Oh crap! Someone must have seized control over the Silver Flame and used it to convert all of its worshippers into zombies via a mass charm spell!

Lilly: Where did you come from!?

Jarlot: I've been playing Warhammer for the past three months.

[End part 1]

OOC: I'll be doing part 2 immediately after it so stay tuned!
Charles Phipps

11-26-06, 02:14 AM		Flame hold

Terra: HOW COULD YOU DO THIS!?

Kronzen: Hahahahahaha! Yes, at last REAL ULTIMATE POWER IS MINE!

Elina: You became a Ninja?

Kronzen: It's a pity the two of you don't worship the Flame and are thus immune to the spell.

Sarah: Kronzen is my master....Elina is my enemy.

*Sarah tackled Elina and the two began fighting Narato style*

Terra: Damnit! Haven't you done enough to Lisa!?

Kronzen: She will forever serve at my side....once more.

Terra: YOU FILTHY BRUT....GAHHHHH!

*Terra was then unable to proceed further*

Terra: What's....happening....

Kronzen: You fool. Did you ever think that merging with a Daelkyr would have consequences beyond it's benefits? You are an outsider and thus as the power of the Flame is mine so shall I am able to TURN YOU.

Terra: You bastarve!

Kronzen: Oh wait, as an evil Cleric that means I can REBUKE you.

Terra: No...no....

Kronzen: Kill your daughter.

Terra: I....WON'T.....DO...I....

*Terra collapsed*

Lisa: I serve only Kronzen.....

Terra: No....

*the doors slam open*

Lilly: AH HA!

Kronzen: Oh great, it's the Full Metal Botanist.

Lilly: ALCHEMIST DUMBASS! ALCHEMY! NOT PLANTS!

Kronzen: Then why are you studying with a druid?

Lilly: Shut up! I'm here at last to stop you and Terra's evil scheme!

*Ivy starts sneaking to the side*

Terra: WHAT!?

Lilly: Oh sorry, force of habit. I detected evil and uh...nevermind. I'm here to stop your evil scheme Kronzen!

Kronzen: You and what army? I wield the full power of the SILVER FLAME!

*the earth shook*

Tira Mirron: You have weakened the flame. All of Khovaire and beyond is endangered because of your hubris.

Kronzen: I can crush you like an insect!

Lilly: No you cannot! Because I am GOOD and Good triumphs over evil always!

*snickering from audience*

Lilly: EVENTUALLY! You have great power Kronzen but that won't save you now.

Kronzen: Oh, so now you respect me, because I'm a threat. That's the way it goes. Seems there are lots of people, whole countries, that want respect, and will pay through the nose to get it. How do you think I got rich? I corrupt the masses, and now I've gained a weapon that only I can defeat, and when I unleash it.....

*ducks a crossbow bolt from Lilly*

Kronzen: OH YOU SLY DOG! YOU CAUGHT ME MONOLOGUING! Hahaha! Very good but you're too low level to hit me!

Lilly: Not unless you take ten for a Set Snares trap like Ivy.

Kronzen: Huh?

*Ivy pushes down one of the Columns of the Church with his vast strength and it crushes Kronzen beneath it*

Ivy: Technically I think that was a pure strength roll.

Lilly: Meh.

*Ivy and Lilly then toss some holy water on the Flame Binding as the painful corruption passes*

Jarlot: My work here is done.

Lilly: What th...YOU DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!!

Jarlot: Did I now?

*beams up...err teleports away*

Lilly: Man, this war sucked. No Orcs, No Undead, No Demons. Just stupid humans.

Ivy: Maybe we're the real monsters.

Lilly: Oh don't start that King Kong crap again! When I want to fight evil, it better damn well have horns!

Pontiff Jaela: At last, the Evil of Kronzen is cleansed.

*she walks towards the flame with her husband's hand beside her as she channels its power...one last time*
rampant

11-26-06, 02:35 AM		Tirmek - Sarah! Elina! SARAH!!

Khan - Monster!

Tirmek - NOT NOW WEAKLING! *call handaxe*

Tirmek decapitates Khan without breaking stride as he works his way towards the girls.
Charles Phipps

11-26-06, 02:41 AM		Lilly: Crap, I knew I missed someone.

Ivy: YAY! TIRMEK SAVED US! He's the greatest hero in the world!

Lilly: :jaw drop:

Ivy: I'm going to tell Queen Diani to give him a medal!
rampant

11-26-06, 02:51 AM		Tirmek - (still walking) give the medal to Maladren, she's the one who disabled Khan's contingency bombs.

Scene shifts to show a dark haired elf girl with familiar scars packing up a bomb kit.

Lisa - Maladren?

Maladren - Didn't figure going in furry was a good plan in this town.

Lisa - Good point.

and back to the kids

Tirmek finally gets to Elina ans Sarah.

Tirmek - (staring into Sarah's eyes) Are you two okay?

---------------------

OOKaizer - TEN :tantrum:

OORampant - :hides: He's...ummmmm... just checking for a concussion.

Silver - Concussion right :bored:
Kaizer_Ryu

11-26-06, 03:16 AM		Terra: Are you ok?

Lisa: I think I have a hangover minus the drinking.

Lilly: I helped too!

Tirmek: Go away.

Sarah: Tirmek and Ivy are so cool!

Elina: Maladren is too!

Maladren: :embarrass :D

Lilly: :allalone: :weep:

Terra: Welcome back, Jaela.

Jaela: Seems I arrived a bit late, though.

Terra: Fashionably so. But don't get rid of this bastard yet.

She walks over and lifts the column off Krozen's broken body with little effort. Setting it back up, she ressurrects him.

Krozen: *cough* Wha-?

Terra: Shut it. You're coming with me.

Lisa: Hon...what are you doing?

Terra: Something I should have done long ago.

She drags him by the collar into the streets of Flamekeep. Many have gathered, including Paladins and Clerics of the Silver Flame that knew firsthand of his treachery. Holding him up before them, Terra speaks to the quickly angering crowd.

Terra: Ladies and Gentlemen of Flamekeep. I give to you the Great Betrayer. Do with him as you please.

Krozen: *utterly terrified* NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

She throws him to the enraged mob. They catch him, but suddenly, all goes quiet. The mob does not tear him apart, but he is thrown to the ground as the crowd parts. An old woman clutches a symbol of the Siver Flame to her chest as she approaches him with a look of utter contempt. After staring at him for a moment, she spits in his face and walks away. Several more commoners repeat this, some following the old woman's idea, others merely cursing his name for all eternity. The look on his face is one of dispair and crushing defeat.

After the commoners finish, two Paladins grab Krozen's arms and begin parading him through the streets. It is at this time Krozen notices several reporters with cameras. He can make out the badges of the Korranberg Chronicle and the Sharn Inquisitive among them, and knew he would never recover from this humiliation.

He is finally led to a large statue of himself erected in the center of the main square. Tied to the base, he watches as the Clerics and Paladins form a large circle. They begin chanting immediately, flecks of the Silver Flame dancing about them. He recognizes the spell as the one used to destroy demons and other vile creatures deemed beyond redemption and begins flailing wildly. His pitiful sobs and cries for mercy fall on deaf ears as Lisa watches from the back. She knows this was of his own doing, but the sight only saddens her as Terra holds her tightly.

At the end of their chanting, the flecks of Silver Flame roared forward and engulfed Krozen and the statue in their purifying flames. His scream died off almost immediately, and when the flames subsided, nothing was left. The ground was left unharmed, but all traces of the Great Betrayer were erased from the square, save for his ashes. The once mighty High Cardinal would forever be damned in the eyes of the Church and the people of Thrane.

Terra: :( I'm sorry, love, but it had to be done.

Lisa: *sniffle* I...I know I should be happy, but...

Terra: *hug* Now, now. You have every right to be sad. He was your father, no matter how he treated you. He brought this on himself.

Lisa: He tried to turn me on you. He tried to turn you on our children. He even turned the girls against one another. Yet...

Terra: That's a part of you I hope you never lose. The part of you I hope Lilly picks up on, at least in part.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-26-06, 03:49 AM		Lilly: Allright! Now that we've got Señor Jerkface out of the way-

Lisa: :(

Terra: *Whack* :mad: Bad Lilly! No Cookie!

Lilly: Ow... I keep getting hit today...

Lisa: No, it's ok. What were you going to say?

Lilly: It's time for the Victory Dance!

Final Fantasy Victory Music plays in the background as each named character does his or her own pose. Lilly totally rips off Cloud. Tirmek, Sarah, and Elina rip off Vyse, Aika, and Fina's victory dance from the scene in Mt. Kazai. Ivy rips off Robo from Chrono Trigger. Maladren immitates Momo from Breath of Fire III. In a move that shocks the rest of them, Terra breaks from the rip offedness and gives Lisa a kiss as she leans her back. Lifting her back up, Lisa looks rather surprised, yet quite happy. Meanwhile, the kids gag. Suddenly, heavy footsteps can be heard. Gregory rounds the corner, out of breath.

Gregory: Did you just say Vic-

Lilly: Too late, hotplate.

Gregory: :weep: Aww, crap...

OOC: If you get the reference, you get a :cookie: .
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-26-06, 08:42 AM		Squishy: *annoyed screech*
13: Ahhhhhhhhh :cloud9: The most important quality to have on this job is patience.
*********
Bunny is randomly wandering the fields of Thrane.

"FOR THE EMPIRE!!"

A marine points his gun at Bunny.

Bunny: :bored:

*cachuckcachuckcachuckcachuck*

The marine is now facing down the barrel of the biggest freakin' gun he's ever seen.

Bunny: Now, I'm told I have to let you surrender first. Since you can only say three things, I suggest you just whimper in compliance.

Marine: *whimper*

Bunny: *sigh*
********
The people in Flamekeep are still having a victory celebration when the an earthquake of epic-level proportions hits.

Terra: Oh no, no way! I'm not having another battle with an über rakshasa on my hands!

OOcat: E.B.N.E.'s perogative. :D Besdies, you won't be having with an über rakshasa.

Beams of light can be seen shooting up all over the world.

Terra: And I don't want to go on some sort of formulaic animé style "hunt the X-number freeds demons" quest!

Everyone gets knocked down by unnatural winds and the sky darkens with clouds.

Lisa (above the noise): Wait, I've been studying you, and whenever you do something like this you have some sort of logical yet completely stupid explanation for what's going on! And you have no problem spilling!

OOcat: That's true. Okay: the Silver Flame's been taking abuse ever since its creation, both from the demons trying to get out and the various people who are corrupt in its name or who use it for barbeque.

FX demon: :rimshot:

OOcat: In addition the flame no longer has its evil component—

Terra: —which anyone from the FF can tell you is necessary to maintain a non-zealous viewpoint!

OOcat: Exactly.

FX demon: *earthquake rumble* *howling wind*

OOcat: To make a long an complicated explanation short, its taken some wear-and-tear, got a regulatory component ripped out, and little miss "keeper" over there—

Jaela: :hides:

OOcat: —hasn't been around to stabalize it. And there's no warranety.

Lilly: So how do we fix it?!

Sound like a large pilot light going out.
urial angel of death

11-26-06, 12:35 PM		Pershing: Don't you suppose that we could evacuate the humans that submit to the Imperium. For is it not our job to protect humanity*?

Hamilton: But any person we save has the risk of being a genestealer hybrid or a minion of chaos.

Pershing: Couldn't we scan for that sort of thing?

Hamilton: You'd think with all of our advanced technology we could, but we can't.

--------
Despite her mind being preoccupied at the moment Catherine's body continues to weave a tapestry of destruction through the Forgotten Freedom's deck, with fire, plasma, and sonic.

OOC: * Space Marine oaths say nothing of defending the innocents, just about saving humans from aliens.
rampant

11-26-06, 12:59 PM		Despite her mind being preoccupied at the moment Catherine's body continues to weave a tapestry of destruction through the Forgotten Freedom's deck, with fire, plasma, and sonic.

Bunny - She's my new favorite!:D
lordalm

11-26-06, 02:26 PM		The Emperor would like his armies back please. You can keep the Nids. We have some Orks, Eldar, Necrons, Tau and the ever lovely Chaos (in Four Smashing Flavors!) we can send your way.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-26-06, 03:36 PM		OOC: I hope this is what you were implying Silver. I also hope I'm not screwing anything up, but this seemed a great opportunity to do some more character development and foreshadowing. Now I'm off to hide before urial and Rei beat me again.

IC:

Lisa: Wait a minute. I thought there was a rule somewhere about how the Silver Flame wasn't a pilot light or something.

13: Rule 2.

Silver: You'd have to go to Dolurrh to do that now, and it wouldn't be nearly as fun.

13: :bored: That joke is getting old.

Jaela: I've got just the thing.

Heading to the inner sanctum, they see the Silver Flame has gone out. Jaela pulls out a grill lighter bearing the Symbol of the Silver Flame as well as that of it's Keeper.

All: :uh-huh:

Jaela: What? It's standard issue.

After attampting to light it several times, she stops.

Jaela: Hmmmm...

Elina: Well, if we can just increase the flow, there shouldn't be a problem.

Sarah: Uh...sis? What are you talking about?

Elina: You mean you didn't hear that? I think it was the nice lady in the Flame.

Jaela: Seems I'm not the only one who can hear her. Tira said the flow of souls is too weak to reignite the Flame.

Terra: Any ideas?

Elina: They're drawn to me, so I figure I can do something.

As she approaches, she hears the wispers of those bound in the Flame. It's physical manifestation had disappeared, but it still existed. She stopped right in front of the altar and spoke.

Elina: Uh...well...yeah. I don't think I'll fully manifest it, but...

The Silver Flame roared back to life and reached out to engulf her.

Lisa: Elina!

Terra stopped her and shook her head.

Terra: She'll be fine.

The flames danced about her, the souls of those that died in the war against the Lycanthropes trying to burn her. Yet nothing happened.

Lisa: How did you kn- oh, right. I keep forgetting about that.

Terra: I actually consider that a plus.

Elina just stands there amidst the flames. She can hear their curses and feel their malice, but she bears no ill will against them. Many Lycanthropes were evil and cruel. What happened to them was partly brought on by their own actions. But she felt only sadness at these souls unable to distinguish between justice and vengeance. Then she heard another voice in her head.

Tira: You are quite astounding, little one. You have a gift that places a heavy burden on your shoulders.

Elina: But I cannot control it. They want rest, but I don't know how I can give it to them.

Tira: You have a gentle spirit. An eternal calm at the core of your being. Let them feel it.

Elina: But...

Tira: They cannot possess you. There is no real spirit to do so. Merely approaching this peace will give them what they need. I will help you.

Elina: ...ok.

The flames surrounding her shrank, and then dissipated. Lisa immediately ran over and held her tightly, trying not to cry. Terra knelt in front of Elina and brushed her pink hair from her face.

Terra: So? Did you find what you were looking for?

Elina: I might have. She said: "The next door you open will reveal the key." I don't know what she meant, but she said I'd know when it happened.
urial angel of death

11-26-06, 04:34 PM		OOC: Your character development I have no problem with and in fact enjoy. What I don't like is you arbirtrary leveling up of characters, which you have managed not to do this time. Now watch me go and be a hypocrite.

IC:Volrath decked out in full Hive Tyrant bio-enhancments, including wings, a venomcannon, extended carapace, and numerous stat boosting add-ons, strides out onto the battlefield. He cuts a path all the way to where Lilly is fighting.

Volrath: *blast**parry**cut* Mind if we have a talk.

Lilly: *dodge**thrust* I'm a bit preoccupied but I'll try to listen.

Volrath: *bite**shallow* Terra was feeding you crap about the detect good, and detect evil auras you know.

Lilly: *stops fighting* What?!

Volrath: *blocks for Lilly* You need to stay focused. Anyway the detect spells measure the composite of your good and evil actions not evil and good seperately. If you gave them a whirl when she wasn't ready she'd read as neutral with strong evil tendencies.

Lilly: *stab* But what about how good of a parent she is? Doesn't that count?

Volrath: *blast**slice* Only very little. As one of your Silver Flame prophets once said. "For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? do not even the followeers of darkness do the same?" The point is that it takes no effort to love those that already love you. The way someone's character can best be judged is when they are under extreme stress. Have you ever seen Terra truely forgive someone?

Lilly: She allowed the horrible Cardinal to live for quite some time.

Volrath: That was only because Lisa asked her to. There are only two things that seperate good from evil. Those are charity and forgiveness. In her heart of hearts Terra has never truely forgiven anyone. No one ever gets a clean slate after commiting a wrong. That is why she is evil albiet not completely.

Lilly: Then what was the point of her deception?

Volrath: To show you that everyone nomatter how far fallen can still be redeemed.
rampant

11-26-06, 04:54 PM		While Elina is doing her thing

Tirra - Well well son of Toren.

Tirmek - Only by blood.

Tirra - You can't fight who you are.

Tirmek - And what is that?

Tirra - That is not my place.

Tirmek - Why are you here then?

Tirra - To warn you.

Tirmek - Of what?

Tirra - Every key has a lock.

Tirmek - :uh-huh:
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-26-06, 05:32 PM		OOC: I hope this is what you were implying Silver. I also hope I'm not screwing anything up, but this seemed a great opportunity to do some more character development and foreshadowing.
Wise-Old-OOcat: Do, or do not, there is no plan. All is random.

Silver: *sigh* I can't make any joke about the innuendo of the whole key-lock thing because Elina is the one who said the thing about the key.

OOKazier: T—:confused: Wait, you aren't going to say anything suggestive? I thought that was your thing.

Silver: And ruin an already well-established potential romance. 13 said it: in this job you need patience.

OOcat: I think OOUrial just confused me: where does tolerance and recognization of the necessity to leave things alone stand in the duality of charity and forgiveness? I kinda need to know.

Bunny: Otherwise I'm just a random psychopath.
Charles Phipps

11-26-06, 05:41 PM		OORose: Volrath is oversimplifying.

OOLilly: What you need to understand is Terra is still a b***.

OOCharles: Now Now...

OORose: Yes, you may be a Spoony Paladin...

OOLilly: HEY!

OORose: But that doesn't change Terra sort of misses that her demonic, monster, and abberation friends aren't exactly the nicest people in the world.

:coolcthul : :weep:

OOLilly: Plus, she's also of the mind that hardcore vengeance is fun and alright with no one getting hurt?

OORose: Yes, Terra is going to eventually find out that a lot of the stuff she did to the EVIL EVIL paladins and fighters of Lycanthropes over her mother left a lot of people horribly scarred.

OOLilly: Oh the angst! Well, now I know!

OORose: And knowing is half the battle.

Voiceover: GIIIII JOEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

OOCharles: Wait, when the hell did you two develop the ability to OOC.
rampant

11-26-06, 05:50 PM		Kithle - I convinced Kanatash to sell lessons.

OOPhips - Okay I see where that gets us... but...

------------------

Kanatash - Lady! stop putting the keyboard in your mouth. Ivy! the interdimensional vortexes are not toys! Sarah stop painting everything pink!
----------------------

OOPhips - Okay I get it now.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-26-06, 05:59 PM		Kithle - I convinced Kanatash to sell lessons.……
………Kanatash - Lady! stop putting the keyboard in your mouth. Ivy! the interdimensional vortexes are not toys! Sarah stop painting everything pink!
13: And he fell for it.

Fourth rule of real teaching: It is a very annoying job.
rampant

11-26-06, 06:35 PM		Maladren - Where's Tirmek?

Sarah - At home Studying. Any threes?

Elina - No he studied ahead last week. Go fish!

Sarah - Oh then he's probably training. Grahg can never win this stupid game!

Maladren - He works so hard. Got any threes?

Sarah - :twitch: *hands over three cards*

Maladren - Ok thats the set.

Elina - Think about who his mother is.

Maladren - Scary chick 2.0.

Elina - Yep. Got any 5's.

Maladren - Grrrr *hands over a card*
Crystalforged

11-26-06, 06:50 PM		Krozen awakens in a white room. He finds that he feels surprisingly good, incridibly good in fact, better than he's ever felt before.

Krozen: Wha- Where am I? What's going on?

Kanatash: (materializing out of thin air) :emp: I am fulfilling a promise I made to you long ago.

Krozen: WHAT!

Kanatash: I promised you that on the day your soul was finally freed from your mortal shell I would be waiting for you there in Dorruth and I would visit suffering on you that would be like nothing any being in the universe has ever experienced before from now until a time beyond the end of eternity. In fact towards those ends I have bestowed upon you great power, power to rival that of a lesser diety, so that the pain inflicted upon you will never be dulled by the descent into madness. You will fully comprehend the incomprehensibility of what you will experience and your suffering will never lessen. That is your eternal fate.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-26-06, 07:07 PM		Kanatash: I promised……I would visit suffering on you that would be like nothing any being in the universe has ever experienced before from now until a time beyond the end of eternity.……
13: Just so long as its not more of that "weird stuff with tentacles" or "non-euclidian geometry" or "horrible scarring emotional pain". :rolleyes:

Kanatash: You have a suggestion.

13: No. Just trying to keep things interesting.
Norr

11-26-06, 07:13 PM		Captains log, stardate [jumble of random numbers]
...
...
Imperial battlecruiser S.S. Anvil
location: planet xiy23.847njsdf8
...

The tyranid splinter fleet has yet to be eradicated. As the our fleet reached the planet of the tyranids infestation, our sensors also found signs of heavy chaos infestation. Several of our men have been lost to these warp beasts, wich also seem to have tainted a large part of the planets populace. After heavy lossess, several of our commanders have turned traitor and signed peace with the planets inhabitants, agreeing to a fiendish scheme to leave the planet and eradicate its existance from the archives!
However, several inexplicable explosions ombord and a number of defective devices have prevented us from meting out the proper punishment. An investigation of the matter is underway. Preliminary results suggest sabotage, and sightings of possible chaos spawn. Affected sections of the ship is currently under quarantine, although malfunctions continue to multiply as well as spreading to new areas. As the possibility of treachery is not to be disgarded, an inquisition has also been established. Hitherto no traitors have been found quilty of sabotage. Inquiries continue.

Thought of the day: Ignorance is bliss.

Emperor protects.

Captains log: update.

An unidentified alien force has taken off from the planet surface. Our sensors inform us that these ships are small, the largest not above 1000 standard imperial feet in length. As our weapons are disabled due to sabotage, fighters have been dispatched to protect the ship and intercept the alien unit. This victory shall be ours!


OOC: Auxiliarly weapons may come back online of it maeks a good story, of course. I wonder what he will say when the 'unit' hails him. And, yes, Squirrel Thing is still on the cruiser. IF it strikes your fancy, you may do as you wish with the cruiser and its crew (and I mean anything, even complete destruction). There are plans. Will continue tomorrow. Too tired...

On a second note, what do you think goes on inside Picards head when he says 'on screen'? Does he ever dread what he will see?
Crystalforged

11-26-06, 07:18 PM		Kanatash: I can't promise those things won't come into play at some point but I was planning on using every trick in the book on this one and then I figure I'll start writing my own book.

13: Any examples?

Kanatash: Well for one I plan to alternate between ultimate suffering and ultimate pleasure, since nothing makes the the pain shaper than inflicting it at the same time you take away everything good remaining in ones existance simultaneously.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-26-06, 08:05 PM		Terra: :D Oh brother of mine!

Rose: I don't like that tone...

Terra: *innocently* Can't I be happy about our shared blood?

Rose: Ok, you're creeping me out. What are you up to?

Terra: Heh. I couldn't help myself. I'm not up to anything, I just found something I thought you should see.

Rose: :bored: Oh joy.

Terra: Take a look at this.

She pulls out the 2nd ed Ravenloft Players Guide and hands it to him.

Rose: :uh-huh: 2nd ed Ravenloft? I do historical games. That means 3.5.

Terra: No, no. Take a look at the classes.

Rose: *flips through* Wait a minute. Where's Bard?

Terra: Keep going.

Rose: But that's the Equipment section.

Terra: Past that.

Rose: That's Spells.

Terra: Further back.

Rose keeps flipping till he hits the last few pages. Finally, past even the Optional Rules, there lies Bard.

Rose: This...this is descrimination! How dare they! :mad:

Terra: Read the description and skills list.

Rose: *after a few minutes* :( I think I'm gonna be sick...

To his horror, Rose discovers that the only skill the Bard gets that is any use at all is Lore. This wouldn't be so bad, except for the realization that the ENTIRE LORE SKILL SET is available from 1st level, thus negating all reason to take more than one level of Bard, if they even did at all.

Terra: I always wondered why Bards are looked down upon so much. Until I saw this.

Rose: I always thought it was because none of the other Classes wanted to admit there was a class that could convince them to be a meatshield as part of its very nature.

Terra: Well, there is that. But the stigma started here. Your class has yet to dig itself out of the sheer immensity of the uselessness displayed here. Mine went from the second or third most useless to the second or third most broken. :P

OOC: Ok, Charles. I'll leave his reaction up to you.
Charles Phipps

11-26-06, 08:35 PM		Rose: Well at least I have some advantages.

Terra: Such as?

Rose: Well for one, Druids didn't exist in 2nd edition.

Terra: WE DID TOO!

Rose: I'm sorry, what's that sound? Yes, that's the sound of Nature Clerics getting everything cool.

Terra: Hey, we were twinked out to the Max!

Rose: Let's see a typical druid in action.

***

Second Edition Terra

Terra: SHAPESHIFT!

*Becomes A Bear*

Orcs: HEY A BEAR! LET'S EAT IT!

*attacks*

***

Rose: Cause...ya know...bears are that much scarier than people with magical weapons and armor.

Terra: Oh shut up! Our powers were really cool.

Rose: *reads second edition* Huhhh look at this. It says you can't progress in level so long as there's higher level druids

Terra: GRRRRRR!

Rose: You know, in Ravenloft you could only be Neutral period.

Terra: Neutral is cool!

Rose: OLD Neutral.

Terra: There was nothing wrong with Old Neutral!

***

Second Edition Terra

Terra: I'm afraid that I have to turn against you now.

Frodo: What!? Why!? Sauron is finally being driven back!

Terra: That's just it! The forces of Good and Evil must be eternally in balance so I must never allow Evil or Good to be defeated.

Frodo: That's insane and only needlessly prolongs the suffering of innocents!

Terra: See this hand? *raises it* Bah *dismisses his objections*

***

Rose: and people wondered why Druids were shot whenever they showed up at parties. More than Anti-Paladins

Terra: Le Sigh. It doesn't matter, now we're cool.

Rose: *raises book* You see this?

Terra: What's that?

Rose: The Book of Swords.

Terra: That's for Fighters!

Rose: And Bards of sufficiently High Level.

*takes out a character class*

*transforms into Sephiroth*

Rose: Ah the joys of prestige classes.

Terra: You'll never be able to...

Rose: *influence reaction*

Terra: :blink: I feel like suddenly you're incredibly cool.

Rose: Honestly, 2nd edition bards kicked ass. Ever read the Complete Book of Bards? That was more broken than the Complete Book of Elves.

Terra: What was broken in the Guide to Elves?

Leogolas: The Complete Book of the Master Race gives us the ability to heal scars, cybernetics, the power to shoot multiple arrows simultaneously, extra proficiencies just because, and telepathy....but only with other elves because humans are dirty dirty buggers.

Terra: Man, what?

Rose: The Complete Book of Bards gives us huge amounts of henchmen and the fact James Bond was a bard.

Terra: JAMES BOND WAS WHAT NOW!?

Rose: Yes, see the Herald Class. So is the Riddler and Batman.

Terra: BATMAN IS NOT A BARD!

Rose: We're apparently Ninjas too.

Terra: LET ME SEE THIS ALLEGED BOOK!
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-26-06, 08:47 PM		OOC: Proof that you guys are great at this is that I have no knowledge whatsoever about any 2nd ed stuff, but that was all :heehee .
urial angel of death

11-26-06, 08:50 PM		Kerrith: True but all of the bardic kits were trying to get away from the bardiness. First thing on the list of disadvantages for almost all of the good ones were can't use bardic music.

Rose: Why are you here.

Kerrith: Master sent me to show off his knowledge of 2nd edition through his pupil, and to crush your dreams. Also I would like to say that the Complete Book of Elves portrayed us for what we truely are, superior to human scum in all ways.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

11-26-06, 08:50 PM		Ash "Bear in mind this was the eddition that Did Psionics so badly people are Still calling it broken. To those people I would like to say: read the (Frelling) book.
This messae brought to you by the Addar Campeghn for Psionic Acceptance. If you wish to join the capeghn realxm stay wehere you are, We already know your idenitys..."
lordalm

11-26-06, 09:00 PM		Chapter Master ALM "Your sure this drivel is from the commanders' minds who styme our great crusade at every turn?"

Astropath Psychobable "Yes Lord ALM, it must be a thought code of exceeding compexety. One influenced by the chaos ensconed within the very depths of the planet."

CM ALM "See Librarian Whippet, he will see to your cleansing. We can not afford to lose anymore to the foul powers of chaos."

*Boyish joy infuses the astropaths face briefly before he brings himself undercontrol*

A Psychobable "Right away my lord."
Charles Phipps

11-26-06, 09:05 PM		Kerrith: True but all of the bardic kits were trying to get away from the bardiness. First thing on the list of disadvantages for almost all of the good ones were can't use bardic music.

Rose: Why are you here.

Kerrith: Master sent me to show off his knowledge of 2nd edition through his pupil, and to crush your dreams. Also I would like to say that the Complete Book of Elves portrayed us for what we truely are, superior to human scum in all ways.

Rose: Well there is a point about Standard Bards too.

Kerrith: Yes?

Rose: They also got 60 guys with spears to follow them around.

Lisa: I remember my aunt. She was a second edition Paladin. She read the Complete Book of Paladins and was so seized by the inability to do anything remotely questionable, she died soon after.

Kerrith: Yes, remember apparently no culture but feudal Europeans can have paladins according to that book.

Rose: Forgetting to Brush your teeth can be an antonement worthy offense.

Kerrith: Do you tithe to your church or feed your family!?*

Lisa: GAH! I roll to disbelieve!

* Actual line from the book.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-26-06, 09:25 PM		Terra: So it's agreed then. 2nd ed sucks all around.

OORei: :mad: Hey!

Rose: Oh, come on Mr. I'm-playing-a-Half-Bronze Dragon/Half-Drow Ranger. You don't need to worry about the constant suckage like everyone else.

OORei: :allalone:

Achika: :( I was ignored during the entirety of the last story arc. I'm going to go wail pitifully in my room for a while.

Rose: I'm prepared for your skills this time. You won't influence MY reacti-

Achika: :bigeyes: :weep:

Rose: OH YOU POOR THING!!! Come, let me ignore my duties and shower you with gifts while I wait on you hand and foot!

Achika: *sniffle* :weep: :) You're so sweet...

Rose: *sweeping her off her feet* Away!

As soon as they leave:

All: :D Wa-pish! Wa-pish! :D
Charles Phipps

11-26-06, 09:50 PM		Lilly: And this is why Bards suck and I'll never have any association with a Bard in any capacity.

Ivy: Her brother! Want to go help pick kittens out of trees?

Lilly: What? I have to go train with my brand new broadsword! Plus I got Elina a copy of Aerith's dress with a matching Tiffa outfit for Sarah!

Ivy: *Influence Reaction*

Lilly: Sorry, fetish wear adds a +4 bonus to my Will Save.

Ivy: Girls like sensetive guys *diplomacy check*

Lilly: Hmmm...I'm undecided *shifts to indifferent*

Ivy: I understand Elina says she'll go on a date with any man whom saves Red X from Professor Hojo! *bluff*

Lilly: I'll do it!
rampant

11-26-06, 11:16 PM		Dorvos - .... *step**step**stumble*

Satnak - I think he's getting the hang of it.

Serene - Yay! two steps in a row!
Kaizer_Ryu

11-26-06, 11:51 PM		Terra: Ok, girls. Are you ready to go?

Elina & Sarah: Hai! :D

Lilly: Why are you going?

Tirmek: You're kidding, right? I'm so not leaving you alone with them.

Lilly: Like I'm going to do anything while their scary-ass mother is breathing down my ne- dammit...

Tirmek: See?

Lilly: :mad:

Lisa: Are you really sure this is a good idea?

Terra: They know me. I learned from quite a few of them before I started out adventuring in earnest. Sure, they're not the most stable or friendly places in Khorvaire, but I know my way around.

Lisa: Just...be careful. I've seen a few of your memories of that time. It makes me very uncomfortable.

Terra: You worry too mu-

Lisa: Please.

Terra: ...allright. If I feel even a little uncomfortable about a situation, I'll remove us from it.

Lisa: Thanks.

Tirmek: Wait a minute. Didn't you have this whole schpeal about how Paladins are immune to fear?

Lilly: Yeah. I still am. I'm just trying to incorporate the fear responses of others into my actions so I don't go dying needlessly.

Tirmek: That seems...oddly intelligent for you.

Lilly: 'cause if I die, I can't keep smiting evil! And who knows what will happen to my darlings! The thought of their anguish over my death is enough to keep me going.

Tirmek: Groan.
rampant

11-27-06, 12:05 AM		Tirmek - You know you could just re-organize the mental contruct that blocks fear to allow for the feeling but not let it overwhelm you.

Lisa - Mental what?

Tirmek - Well Obviously there is a mental block of somesort that prevents you from feeling fear. If its an implanted or trained ability its most likely a mental construct that blocks or redirects fear reactions. I always thought that was dicey though, screwing with the flight or fight mentality is always dangerous. If the construct is flawed it makes you unfeeling like a zombie or overcharge your fight reactions...You know this explains Lily.

Lisa - I need to look up class feature substitutions real quick.
Charles Phipps

11-27-06, 12:18 AM		Lilly: So, when's my Paladin trials anyway?

Terra: Your what?

Lilly: You know, after I complete my training I must face Darth Vader alone.

Terra: That's Jedi Lilly.

Lilly: And aren't we glad I'm not since they're chaste!

Terra: Oh for Pete's sake.

Lilly: In any case, I'm ready for the Eldeen Reaches.

Terra: ARMED?

Lilly: Yes! My Sword of Fairy Slaying +4, my Singing Sword of Hag Smiting +3, my Vorpal Sword of Orc Bane +4, and my Luck Blade of Illithid Doom +5

Terra: Where the hell did you get so many magical items?

Lilly: It's amazing how much you can find by just walking into people's houses and checking their treasure chests.

Terra: :blink: Isn't that stealing?

Lilly: No, that's against the Paladin's code. However, like Rose and Uncle Jarlot they explain no one seems to object in Final Fantasy.

Terra: Point taken.

Lilly: Plus I have a Wand of Fireballs, Wand of Lightning Bolts, Wand of Ogrekin Smashing, and Wand of Bibgy's Crushing Tak-Nuke one charge.

Terra: Lilly, hand that all over.

Lilly: I can't. Dad said I'd need it.

Terra: HE WHAT!?

Lilly: He said the lands of Droam were filled with terrifying evils that were a threat to everyone.

Terra: That's just...grrr....URGH! THE PREJUDICE OF THAT MAN!

***

Droam

William the Ogre: So you want to go skin some villagers alive?

Bob the Troll: Only if we get to rape and pillage first. Then burn it down.

Mary Medusa: It sure is fun working for the Hags.

Bob the Troll: Yeah but I miss Terra.
rampant

11-27-06, 12:48 AM		Tirmek - Look Lily its not all that hard to deal with trolls and the like. My aunt lived amongst them for years, just pull their nose really hard thats their weakspot.

Lily - Thanks, maybe you're alright afterall.
-exits-

Sarah - Wait one minute, isn't your alignment Nuetral good?

Tirmek - I told the absolute truth, it hurts'em like all hell.

Elina - But...

Tirmek - Listen without those weapons he won't stand a chance, this way there's plenty of screaming before hand so we have a little warning. He was gonna cause trouble anyway so this way he doesn't kill anyone or get killed too quickly for us to intervene.

Sarah - But it was such a kithle moment.

Tirmek - I'm good, not nice.
Crystalforged

11-27-06, 01:41 AM		Ash "Bear in mind this was the eddition that Did Psionics so badly people are Still calling it broken. To those people I would like to say: read the (Frelling) book.
This messae brought to you by the Addar Campeghn for Psionic Acceptance. If you wish to join the capeghn realxm stay wehere you are, We already know your idenitys..."
Amen, Brother. Preach on!

You may want to go underground for a while though, I hear the Gram'mar is coming for you.
Norr

11-27-06, 08:56 AM		*The following has been translated to common for your convenience*

The squirrel fleet is closing in on the S.S. Anvil. A multitude of smaller ships lifts off from the behemoth in front of them.

Squirrel comm-officer: Captain, we're being hailed.

Squirrel Commander *leans back in his seat*: On screen.

The screen flickers and a red-eyed, black-furred squirrel face appears.

Squirrel Thing *taps the mike*: Is this thing on?

Squirrel Commander: This is the Commander of the SSD Acorn, identify yourself.

Squirrel Thing *salutes*: Name's Squirrel Thing Sir! At you service Sir!

Squirrel Commander: Your on the Anvil?

Squirrel Thing: Yessir! Took the wrong door out of Erk's place Sir! Crews' a zealous mean bunch, didn't know there was a friendly fleet out there Sir, have been spending my time undermining their operations Sir!

Squirrel Commander: Very well then soldier, report!

Squirrel Thing: Numerous control consoles rigged and decommissioned. Only four com-links remain functional, three of which are located on the bridge. Main and auxiliary weapons nonfunctional. 30% of vital crew in detention under sabotage charges, 20% nonvital crew under same conditions, ship efficiency down to 23%. Shields still functional. However, I have their frequencies, sending them over now. 10% of the skiffs have been rigged to fail as they fire, 12% lack shields, 20% will experience reactor faliure before reaching your position, totalling a 28% reduction of the fighting force. Some of them may be willing to surrender.

Squirrel Commander: Good work man! You have done much in few days...

Squirrel Thing: :confused: Days, Sir? I've been here two weeks.

Squirrel Commander: What exactly did you have at Erk's?

Squirrel Thing: Two pints of necropolitan, why?

Squirrel crew: :uh-huh:

Squirrel Commander: ... That would explain some things. As Erk's places position in space and time is wholly subjective it depends on the patron to provide the time and place of exit, even if drunk. However, theoretically, a man/squirrel may reach such intoxication levels that his own system fails to provide a location for the Exit, and as such may exit to the wrong place, or time.
However, back to military matters. Do you have a plan of extraction?

Squirrel Thing: Yessir, there are emergency drop-pods in the staging area, ready to be launched in case of immanent destruction.

Squirrel Commander: Is that standard imperial protocol?

Squirrel Thing: Nossir, special order from 'higher up' :D, all prisoners and many of the crew are ready to launch, sir, 'just in case'.

Squirrel Commander: Good work soldier, if you decide to enlist when this is over, there may be a promotion in store for you.

Squirrel Thing *hopeful*: Something in the airforce sir?

Squirrel Commander: That may be, soldier. Over and out.

Squirrel Thing *salutes*: Over and out.

As the screen goes blank, the Squirrel commander adresses his crew.

Squirrel Commander: Comm-officer, contact the other ships and inform them the enemy fleet may have been subject to sabotage.

Squirrel comm-officer: Sir?

Squirrel Commander: We take no risks liutenant. Also give them the frequency of the Anvils shields, but tell them to switch to standard tactics immediately should it prove ineffective. Also ask them to refrain from targeting any drop-pods launched during the attack, if naught else the ground troops should be able to handle them.

Squirrel comm-officer: Yessir.

OOC: next part, the battle.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-27-06, 09:05 AM		Lisa - I need to look up class feature substitutions real quick.
Unearthed-Arcana-Fan-OOcat: Paladin of Freedom has an Aura against compulsion effects.

Lisa:………………Is that it?

Bunny: Paladins don't get much love. Primarily because they're mechanically boring.

Lisa and Lilly: WHAT?! :headexplo

Bunny: All you get is the ability to hit the evil guys a little harder? The new samurai class can do that, and no one likes it.

Lisa: What about our other class features?

Lilly: Such as the ability to know what evil lurks in the hearts of men?

13: Haven't we already established in this thread that detect evil is boring and not foolproof?

Bunny: Let's see…………(looks in Hypertext d20 SRD)………you get a bonus to saves, immunity to disease, the ability to cure wounds and disease, undead turning, and the special mount.

Lisa and Lilly: :D

Bunny: Show of hand, those in the audience who ever notice those abilities.

Audience: *cricket chirp*
Chrys

11-27-06, 10:09 AM		D'Ducky: Hey I like Pallies, Immune to fear is nice... so it the ablitiy to remove STDs. Plus in the the new mage book they get some ok replacement stuff. Plus if your Dm's really nice you can be one of those Sex-Paladins for that other world.

Lilly: Sex-Paladins, I like the sound of that?

Lisa: ... D'Ducky shut up.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-27-06, 10:26 AM		D'Ducky: ……Plus if your Dm's really nice you can be one of those Sex-Paladins for that other world.
Silver: Sex-paladins?

D'Ducky: Why is my head suddenly inside a giant metal barrel?
Kaizer_Ryu

11-27-06, 11:31 AM		Silver: I thought we already had one of those...

Lisa: I am not a Sex-Paladin!

Silver: The sheer quality and quantity of your work would suggest otherwise. :devil:

Lisa: Just because I am a complete and total w**** for my wife does not make me a Sex-Paladin.

Silver: So you're monogamous. That doesn't preclude Sex-Paladinity.

Lisa: :nonono:
Charles Phipps

11-27-06, 11:59 AM		OOCharles: Actually, Lisa is a Sex Paladin.

Lisa: What?

OOCharles: Not YOU Lisa but the Lisa you're based on. In the original Forgotten Freedom campaign you're a Forgotten Realm import.

Lisa: NOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oo!

OOCharles: Yes, meet Lisa Hopeforge! Paladin of Sune!

Lisa II: HI EVERYBODY!

*Paladin bounces in with HUGE warhammer*

Lisa II: My duty is to bring love and joy to the world through sex! Make love not war...unless you're a dirty, dirty, child abuser then I WILL...

*sky darkens and her eyes blaze fire*

FEED YOU TO MY FLESH EATING CELESTIAL MOUNT THAT BREATHES FlAME!

OOCharles: Oddly, I don't see a difference with Lisa I.
rampant

11-27-06, 12:57 PM		Tirmek - *raises hand*

OOCharles - Yes:rolleyes:

Tirmek - Mrs.Hopeforge never summoned a celestial mount.

Lilly - Yeah she married one.

Lisa - Ok on one hand that was almost amusing, on the other... Terra get him.

Lily - :eek:

Lisa - I did so.

*horse materializes next to her*

Lisa - His name Bob.

Bob - whinny

*bob dissapears*
--------------------

Okay its pretty mangled, but :twocents: to the first to get that reference
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-27-06, 01:27 PM		Silver: Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold it: don't we already have enough alternates on this thread as it is, even of Lisa? Isn't there an evil clone somewhere?

Rose: Since when do you argue against the amount of :pile: in this world?

Silver: Since I already have a good thing going with one Lisa.

Rose: But this would get you two paladins!

Lisa (I): Hey!

Silver: Well, I'm not really a paladin person. I prefer crusaders. More endurance.
rampant

11-27-06, 01:33 PM		OORampant - Wouldn't that mean warblades, barbarians, and knights are even better?

Silver - Barbarians don't last long once fury lets out, knights wear too much armor,... Really can't complain about Warblabes.
Charles Phipps

11-27-06, 02:07 PM		OOC: Is it a reference to the Order of the Stick raven familiar? The one who appears then disappears?

;-)

IC:

Lilly: Okay, I promise I won't bring along any wands, swords, crossbows, maces, morningstars, polerams, lances, spears, machetes, daggers, dirks, man catchers, flails, longbows, shortbows, composite bows, stakes, whips, staves, flaming oil, blowguns, attack scrolls, sais, battleaxes, hand axes, warhammers, or Greek Fire.

Terra: AND?

Lilly: FINE...no clubs either.

Terra: Good.

Lilly: Can I bring along some RPGs to play with?

Terra: *sigh* That sounds fine.

Lilly: ALRIGHT!

*Terra walks off*

Ivy: She's letting you take those Rocket Propelled Grenades that you got from the Space Marines?

Lilly: Yeah, I'm surprised at how nice she's being about those.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-27-06, 02:16 PM		Silver - ……Really can't complain about Warblabes.
Silver: Don't know why, though. And no idea what a warblabe is.

Anti-Gram'mar: Yarrrrgh! Ye be me next victim!

Silver: What are you?

Anti-Gram'mar: I be the Anti-Gram'mar, sent from the planes of Chaos to ensurr that all those who annoyingly call for correct grammer and spelling receive their just rewards!

Silver: :bored: Don't we have Naggat for that?

Naggat: *playing Twilight Princess in the future* Leave me out of this.

Anti-Gram'mar: He be no good at 'is job. 'e's too inconsistent.

13 (interjecting): He's a Possible (i.e. Chaotic Inevitable), he's supposed to be inconsistent.

Anti-Gram'mar: :confused: Yarrr?

13: And why could the Chaotic planes ever give a damn about something someone did that was Lawful?

Anti-Gram'mar: Yarrr, it be in the Chaotic nature to do even things that are Lawful to ensure randomness!

13: So the make the effort to do everything so that they are Chaotic and random?

Anti-Gram'mar: Arrr.

13: Doesn't that mean they are being Lawful to be consistantly random?

Anti-Gram'mar: (nervously) Arr?

13: So you really work for Lawful forces.

Anti-Gram'mar: :eek:

13: And therefore you would support Lawful activities. Such as correcting spelling.

Anti-Gram'mar: :crazy:

Silver: You are really good at that.

13: Hey, I invented lawyers. :D
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

11-27-06, 02:21 PM		Anti-Gram'mar: I be the Anti-Gram'mar, sent from the planes of Chaos to ensurr that all those who annoyingly call for correct grammer and spelling receive their just rewards!


OOC Eled: "My serch for a boddyguard has ended. Im Eled, and i suport Broadening of Godwins law to apply to Gramar Natizs.
Gladius_Lucix

11-27-06, 02:48 PM		OOC: Since I never seem to be here for the good bits, I'm doing this now. Since I don't know the standard equipment of Space Marines, I'm just refering to it as a rifle.
----
Flashback: The Incursion.
A squad of Space Marines, who have yet to find anything (lucky for them), methodically search the halls. Opening the door they've come upon, they see a halfling standing before a holographic map of the Forgotten Freedom. A pile of Duct Tape sits next to him.

Commander: If we can take this, we'll finally be able to figure how to get around in this blasphemous mockery of a ship.

Liam: A surge on the main deck, probably the invaders. Terra's doing well over there. Kanatash seems to be having fun down there.

Swarm: Liam, we have visitors.

Liam: Oh. Hello. You wouldn't be coming here to surrender, would you?

Commander: No. Shoot to kill, men.

Liam: Sigh. I thought not. Swarm, if you would?

Swarm: Gladly.

A roll of Duct Tape springs out of the shadows near the door, wrapping the muzzles of the marines' rifles in Duct Tape.

Commander: Tape? Is that all you've got?

Liam: No, but it should be enough.

Commander: Open fire!

The marines do so. The round leaves the chamber, and strikes the duct tape covering. The portion of Swarm next to Liam noticibly winces, but the rounds bounce back, striking the next round that was supposed to come out of the barrel. In each rifle, a similar pile up happens, irreperably damaging them.

Liam: Told you it would be enough. Changed your mind about that surrender?

Commander: Not a chance. Hand to hand, men.

The marines drop their ruined rifles and approach.

Liam: I really didn't want to do this.

Liam pulls out a wand with a very noticible Weirsan Reciever.

Liam: I haven't tested the effects of a Weirsan enhanced enchantment spell on mortal minds yet. You guys'll have to be the first.

With that, Liam fires a Weirsan powered confusion spell at each marine in turn.

Commander: What did you just do?

Liam: I'm not exactly sure. Probably driven them utterly insane. I guess you'll be going now. I'd rather that not happen, though. Swarm, the door?

A web of duct tape, sticky side in, forms over the doorway, catching the commander as he tries to flee. A final shot from the confusion wand renders him rather tractable.

--------

Now:

Liam: I figured, since you're the expert on insanity, both the destination and the journey, so you'd be the best to ask.

Kanatash: What did you do to them?

Liam: Weirsan empowered confusion spell.

Kanatash: Heh. Well, while it is quite efficient, and thorough, there's no flair. I mean, the fun of driving someone insane is the driving part, not the insanity afterwards. These guys are just broken husks. There's almost no mind left to speak of.

Liam: So, how would you rate it?

Kanatash: Like I said, there's no flair. It's just too quick.
rampant

11-27-06, 03:10 PM		Fluffy - meow (au contraire') Meow purr meow purr (one and two and...)

The rines form a congo line. and proceed to dance out the door.

Kanatash - That was weird.

Liam - How?

Fluffy - Meow (i'm a cat)
------------------------------

:twocents: for Phipps
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-27-06, 03:46 PM		Liam - How?

Fluffy - Meow (i'm a cat)
OOcat: Preach it, brother!
lordalm

11-27-06, 05:07 PM		Space Marines are armed with Bolters. Said weapon is a semi-automatic weapon that use Bolter rounds. Said rounds are mini-rockets with warheads designed to punch through armour and then blow up on the inside of the armor bearer. In the above Liam incounter, if such did occur there wouldn't be anything left of anyone involved to drive insane.

Thank you come again.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-27-06, 05:36 PM		Space Marines are armed with Bolters. Said weapon is a semi-automatic weapon that use Bolter rounds. Said rounds are mini-rockets with warheads designed to punch through armour and then blow up on the inside of the armor bearer. In the above Liam incounter, if such did occur there wouldn't be anything left of anyone involved to drive insane.

Thank you come again.
Bunny: DAMN YOU, OOGLADIUS! :rant: (;) )
Norr

11-27-06, 05:37 PM		In the above Liam incounter, if such did occur there wouldn't be anything left of anyone involved to drive insane.

Remember, the ship is filled to the brim (overflowing, in fact) with chaos energies. Liam actually built a machine to concentrate this to power magic items. He's spent the best part of at least two years within one workbenchs' length of the equivalent of an insanity-powered open-core nuclear reactor. He probably used it to create the duct-tape swarm golem.
Given this, anything could have happened with the marines and/or their equipment just by entering the same room as him. The bolters had weirsan-infused duct-tape wrapped around their muzzles. Given the nature of weirsan energy, since the most probable course of events would be the one you described, it would be the least likely to happen. Merely jamming the guns one thing, but remember, utter chaos beyond imagination is just a polydimensional die roll away.
Crystalforged

11-27-06, 06:03 PM		Liam: I figured, since you're the expert on insanity, both the destination and the journey, so you'd be the best to ask.

Kanatash: What did you do to them?

Liam: Weirsan empowered confusion spell.

Kanatash: Heh. Well, while it is quite efficient, and thorough, there's no flair. I mean, the fun of driving someone insane is the driving part, not the insanity afterwards. These guys are just broken husks. There's almost no mind left to speak of.

Liam: So, how would you rate it?

Kanatash: Like I said, there's no flair. It's just too quick.
Congratulations, here's a :behold: for accurate portrayal of a bat f*** insane being hailing from a location beyond any comprehension of space and time. You should feel proud.

Possibly frightened as well.

Thats exactly how I would have had Kanatash react. You were thinking just like I do.
rampant

11-27-06, 07:55 PM		Dorvos - hmmmmmmmmmmmm

Satnak - The humming is nice, but shouldn't he be talking?

Serene - Its not unusual for children to lag on learning to talk.

Satnak - I'm just glad he was quick on the potty training.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-27-06, 09:20 PM		Satnak - I'm just glad he was quick on the potty training.
13: Not getting annoyed, :thinks: where am I failing?
*******
OOcat: I just found this picture of Olidammara, anyone else thinks that looks like Spoony? picture (http://www.wizards.com/dnd/images/dd_gallery/dd1/Olidammara_p89.jpg)

Random Inevitable: That is not Gruumsh. That is a cyclops.

Silver: I have to say, I never expected St. Cuthbert to look the best.

Bunny: Those elves need to eat something. I'm not saying they're anorexic, just………is that Nerull? Okay, he's no longer officially an assitant death god. I'm giving the job to Vecna. We have an image to maintain.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-27-06, 10:16 PM		Tirmek - Mrs.Hopeforge never summoned a celestial mount.

Lilly - Yeah she married one.
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

That is hilarious! And it's more or less true. :devil:

IC:

Terra carries Lilly by the collar as they head through the markets of Zarash'ak. She is none too pleased as they make their way towards the House Tharashk Guild headquarters.

Terra: I still can't believe you did that!

Lilly: They were dirty, dirty Half-Orcs guarding a place rife with dark energy! What else was I supposed to think?!

Tirmek: If you hadn't failed your Spot Check, you might have noticed the Guild markings, the Dragonmarks, or maybe the GIANT SIGNS stating that it was a new Eberron Dragonshard Field.

Lilly: I think I just failed my Listen Check.

Tirmek: *sigh*

Goblin Ninja: This guy is just pathetic.

Lilly: Failed another Spot Check...

Elina: :rolleyes: You had to make Wisdom your dump stat, didn't you?

Lilly: I'm working on it. If your Mom hadn't stopped me, I might have gotten enough experience to level up again!

Terra: If I hadn't stopped you, healed the poor man, and agreed to pay damages, you'd be a very dead and certainly not leveled up young idiot.

Lilly: *pouts*

Sarah: Hey cool! Check this out! *holds up a Dragonshard necklace*

Terra: That's just a fake to get the tourists' money. If you want the good stuff, you have to know where to look. Put it back.

Sarah: Awwwww...

As she sets it back down, the fake gem bumps into another, egg shaped gem. Unknown to the group as they move along, the gem rolls off the stand and into the tent behind it. Within, several members of a Cult of the Dragon Below stand around a table as they plot their usual hairbrained schemes in service to Khyber and her minions.

Male Orc Ranger: How go the preparations?

Male Goblin Cleric: Very well.

The Goblin pulls a large bottle from his cloak and sets it on the table. A strange liquid bubbles inside, shifting colors at random.

Male Goblin Cleric: With this, the Tharashk Triumverate will bow to our will and serve our glorious cause.

Female Human Assassin: *from the shadows* Don't celebrate yet. We still have to get them to drink it.

Male Orc Ranger: That's your job.

Female Human Assassin: I should certainly hope so. I don't need a couple of Elephants clomping about as I work. You two could at least put some ranks into Move Silently...

At this time, the gem rolls into the tent. It bumps into a spear set against the wall, knocking it over. As it falls, it knock over a jar of acid. The acid quickly burns through the shelf it is on, sending the other contents crashing to the ground. The three cultists stare in horror as the different magical components mix badly. The resulting explosion throws the Orc Ranger into the table, crushing both it and the potion.

Male Goblin Cleric: :weep: NOOOOOOOO!!!!! :weep: It took me three months, a years worth of gold, every ounce of cunning and guile I possess, and at least a dozen scrapes with death to get the ingredients for that!

At this time, several Orc, Half-Orc, and Human Tharashk House Guards storm the tent and easily overwhelm the trio. Meanwhile, Terra and the kids have entered the Guild Headquarters, wondering where the extra EXP they just earned came from.

OOC: I'm hoping to make this kind of thing a running joke. If you want to join in, the only rules are that 1.) they foil some evil plan and 2.) that they remain completely oblivious to their accomplishment.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-27-06, 10:24 PM		OOC: I'm hoping to make this kind of thing a running joke. If you want to join in, the only rules are that 1.) they foil some evil plan and 2.) that they remain completely oblivious to their accomplishment.
OOC: In the morniiiiii…………………………

13: Looks like we get to do what we do every day. :rolleyes:
rampant

11-28-06, 12:43 AM		Tirmek - Okay whats the big deal over these shards? I mean yeah they have nifty energy storage/imprinting properties and can be used to make items that have deeper reserves than normal but other than that?

Terra - These shards are the basis for the binding techniques used to create many devices such as bound armor, or airships.

Sarah - Earl lives in a Shard the size of your head.

Tirmek - So these must be the equivalents to the A-drives of my own realm.

Elina - A-drive?

Tirmek - Bit of a misnomer actually, more like a battery that can be recharged at horrendous distances. The first bit is the actual energy storage and reciever any random cyrstal generally works, though higher quality gems mean greater efficiency, the next bit is the conducter wires (usually gold, silver, copper, or platinum, from the crystal core to the rest of the device that power whatever weapon, vehicle, or what have you. Now the cores are the easy piece, gems can be grown and a little chronomancy goes a long way. Now each core is attenuated to a main battery, often a larger version of the smaller A-drive, Only the wires are the conduits for a psion to pour strength into the battery that then transmits it to its respective A-drives. Now a Psion can be trained to use other energitics to fuel the battery, even others' energitics, but a psychic is necessary even then. Most armies posses a few truly massive batteries maintained by dozens of psychics using metaconcert daily.

Terra - Why not simply deploy the psychics with the troops?

Tirmek - A psychic for every hover skid? every pulser? every single little accelerator? Every Tank? every battle cruiser might be possible though. ITs about having power where it needs to be right that instant. Besides its cruel to put psychics out against normal soldiers.
-stalks off to talk to a couple of half-orc vendors-
Gladius_Lucix

11-28-06, 08:04 AM		@Norr: The Swarm was actually created using a weirsan enhanced Animate Object on a pile of rolls of duct tape, followed by a weirsan enhanced Awaken Construct.

@Crystalforged: *bows* Thank you. *pause* I think.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-28-06, 08:21 AM		Tirmek - Bit of a misnomer actually, more like a battery that can be recharged at horrendous distances. The first bit is the actual energy storage and reciever any random cyrstal generally works, though higher quality gems mean greater efficiency, the next bit is the conducter wires (usually gold, silver, copper, or platinum, from the crystal core to the rest of the device that power whatever weapon, vehicle, or what have you. Now the cores are the easy piece, gems can be grown and a little chronomancy goes a long way. Now each core is attenuated to a main battery, often a larger version of the smaller A-drive, Only the wires are the conduits for a psion to pour strength into the battery that then transmits it to its respective A-drives. Now a Psion can be trained to use other energitics to fuel the battery, even others' energitics, but a psychic is necessary even then. Most armies posses a few truly massive batteries maintained by dozens of psychics using metaconcert daily.
Bunny: Sooooooooooooooooooooo much easier just to smash things. :rolleyes:

Silver: :D

Gram'mar 2 (fromerly Anti-Gram'mar): You know, we're not asking you to be obsessive about how you write these things, it would just be easier to read if the proper punctuation and capitalization were put in, not to mention some method of breaking it up to be easier for the eye to follow.

OOcat: I am probably the only entity in all of existence who can create an inevitable who's reason for action sound completely reasonable.
Gladius_Lucix

11-28-06, 09:36 AM		Liam sits at his workbench, head down. He isn't asleep, but he's not working on anything, either. The Swarm looks worried.

Swarm: What's wrong, Liam?

Liam: There's nothing left to build. Since the Probability Drive can do anything, I don't need any other inventions. I'm *gulp* done.

Swarm: Oh, :censored:.

The Swarm rolls out the door, and splits up, leaving Liam moping on the drafting table. The various portions of the Swarm spread out over the ship, looking for ubers, and the more useful scum. To each, it gives the same message.

Swarm: Liam's in a funk. He says he's done. I don't know how to help im. Every other time he finished a project, he would be going through reams of paper, parchment, and bar napkins to find a new project to work on. Now... he's just stopped. I'm worried about him.

----
Meanwhile:
OOGladius stands on an infinite, featureless plane, staring down Dramadar.

Dramadar: I never thought that you would be a problem.

Dramadar draws its sword, and approaches.

OOGladius: Don't come any closer. I've got a Weirsan empowerd wand of disable construct and I'm not afraid to use it.
rampant

11-28-06, 12:07 PM		Dorvos is playing with blocks while Satnak whatches from a chair.

Dorvos - hmmmmmm

Satnak - Elina...needs to stop wasting all her energy at the begining, work on resource management. Sarah...knowing when to ask for help is one thing, but stop letting Tirmek and Elina do all the strategizing. Tirmek...the class is based on improvement from the begining of the semester, not winning, focus on improvement of self instead victory over others.

He's never gonna be able to beat Sarah and Elina on pure physicall anyway.

Serene enters

Serene - What are you up to?

Satnak - Just putting a few last notes on the report cards. I just finished the conditioning course. Where did i put the stuff for the energitcs.

Serene - Under the couch silly girl.

Satnak - Thanks love. hmmmm Sithis ... Excellent progress, but need more physical developement soon or your body won't be able to handle the arcane rush. Tirmek ... Again I don't care how much better you are then the rest of the class, focus on improvement for its own sake.

Serene - Who's that playing with dorvos... and how did he get in here?

Scene does a quick shift to a small vaugley humanoid silvery mass with blurry features standing next to Dorvos.

Satnak - *Looks up* Thats just mmmmhhhmmmmm or as near as i can figure out what Dorvos identifies it as.

Serene - Huh?

Satnak - A figment, an imaginary friend.

Serene - He's handing Dorvos blocks he's right there!

Satnak - A manifestation of Psionic capability, apparently he has a knack for astral constructs. I remember mine... * a blue rat the size of an adult human is brought forth from the astral realm *
Charles Phipps

11-28-06, 12:39 PM		On the Borders of Breland

Terra: And this is the house I learned druidism at!

Lilly: Why does it have a big stone altar with glyphs of evil on it.

Terra: Those aren't evil glyphs.

Lilly: They're just short of 'Hand of Vecna' level evil.

Sarah: It's also laden with human blood.

Terra: Well silly dears, try and realize that the Dark Six are disliked by many churches and the ways of the Fury are a bit unconventional to outsiders. Any participants were entirely willing and healed after shedding their blood.

Elina: Mom, there's a pile of human skulls over there.

Terra: Collected after death from the faithful! It's a huge honor!

Sarah: There's gnawed on human bones in the fire pit.

Terra: Those aren't human bones Sarah! Don't be silly! Those are bones of the giant bipedial apes that are a preferred food of the forces here.

Sarah: Uhh.....mom, what sect were you a member of?

Terra: Well I always loved snow so the Children of Winter.

Sarah, Elina, and Lilly: :uh-huh:

*A giant pair of ogres walk out wearing necklaces of human teeth and skins of the flesh of sentient beings*

Terra: AUNTIE SNARLTOOTH! UNCLE THRASH BLOOD!

Uncle Thrash Blood: TERRA! SO GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN! AND YOU BROUGHT DINNER!

*points his club at the unicorn*

Buttercup: Meep.

Lilly: *takes a deep breath* I understand now I was wrong.

Elina: Eh?

Lilly: My lessons are coming along wonderfully! Despite the fact this place radiates pure and intense evil with their auras positively reaking of chaos! I understand I am mistaken and they are good and kind folk!

Sarah: Uhh...Lilly....

Tirmek: It's okay Sarah. Let's not disillusion him right now.

Elina: Mom is acting...strange.

Sarah: You mean oblivious to all rationality for the pursuit of her beliefs?

Elina: Uh huh. She's acting like Lilly.

Lilly: HEY!

Sarah: Yes, this is very weird.
lordalm

11-28-06, 03:40 PM		Remember, the ship is filled to the brim (overflowing, in fact) with chaos energies. Liam actually built a machine to concentrate this to power magic items. He's spent the best part of at least two years within one workbenchs' length of the equivalent of an insanity-powered open-core nuclear reactor. He probably used it to create the duct-tape swarm golem.
Given this, anything could have happened with the marines and/or their equipment just by entering the same room as him. The bolters had weirsan-infused duct-tape wrapped around their muzzles. Given the nature of weirsan energy, since the most probable course of events would be the one you described, it would be the least likely to happen. Merely jamming the guns one thing, but remember, utter chaos beyond imagination is just a polydimensional die roll away.


Oh well that explains it then, carry on.
rampant

11-28-06, 04:53 PM		Dorvos - hmmmmmm

Rashour - Hewwo

Dorvos - mmmmmm-mmmmm

Rashour - Hi

Dorvos - Do-wop-de-ooooo

Rashour - :uh-huh: :mymy: :twitch: :eek: :confused:
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-28-06, 05:22 PM		Way, way, waywaywaywaywaywaywaywaywaywaywaywaywayw aywaywayway back when……… (inspired by Ice Age. please, no spoilers if you join in.)

Bunny come across Silver watching two creatures girating against each other.

Bunny: What's this?

Silver: It's a new method of reproduction I came up with. I was wondering how to solve the need for a liquid medium, and I realized that the interior of a fleshy body is mostly water. So, I created a method of internal fertilization.

The watch for a few more minutes.

Bunny: Seems to require a lot of effort.

Silver: Yeah, well, I did have to program some new drives to make the whole process get off. Funny thing, I showed them to 13, and you could literally see the neurons firing.

Bunny: That can't be good.

Silver: I know.

They continue to watch the grunting and heaving and sweating.

Bunny: Yeah, I can't see this catching on.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

11-28-06, 05:24 PM		Uncle Thrash Blood: TERRA! SO GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN! AND YOU BROUGHT DINNER!

*points his club at the unicorn*

Buttercup: Meep.

Lilly: *takes a deep breath* I understand now I was wrong.


(OOC: As I read that, and before scrollind down, my first thought was that Lilly was Realy disapointed wen he got a unicorn...)

Ash aproches Kantash, his walk awkward, oddly halting, hesitant, his usual venear of confidance replaced with timid fearfullness.
"I need you to drive me mad."

Kantash "say what?"

Ash "Since the Tiranids came, the madness, the lust for flames, has no longer plaged me... but nor has my strenght. I have many foes, demon lords and high ranking Quori, I need the madness back, or I luse everything. Can you help?"
lordalm

11-28-06, 05:35 PM		(OOC: As I read that, and before scrollind down, my first thought was that Lilly was Realy disapointed wen he got a unicorn...)

Ash aproches Kantash, his walk awkward, oddly halting, hesitant, his usual venear of confidance replaced with timid fearfullness.
"I need you to drive me mad."

Kantash "say what?"

Ash "Since the Tiranids came, the madness, the lust for flames, has no longer plaged me... but nor has my strenght. I have many foes, demon lords and high ranking Quori, I need the madness back, or I luse everything. Can you help?"


Souns like a new project for Liam.....
rampant

11-28-06, 07:01 PM		OOC: I wonder how many lurkers like lordalm and Paulon we have? Not complaining, just curious.
------------------------------------------------

Rashour - I don't like Dorvos dad, all he does is make singy noises.

Terrek - He just chooses to express himself differently son, besides you have to admit he is pretty good.

Rashour - But I can't tell if he's insulting me!

Terrek - If he's anything like your aunt Satnak you'll know when he's insulting you.
Charles Phipps

11-28-06, 07:35 PM		Lilly: Since they dislike unicorns, they can't be all bad.

*America's "The Last Unicorn" plays in the background*

Lilly: *groan*
Kaizer_Ryu

11-28-06, 08:07 PM		Terra: :nonono: I ask you to watch them for five minutes and you go off and fill their heads with this nonsense?

Thailis (Changeling - currently male): Oh, come on. You've gone all square on us. You used to be cool!

Tirmek: Now I'm completely confused.

Elina: The fact that Mom is a Warden, not a Child of Winter should have tipped you off.

Sarah: Not to mention that she learned Druidism from Gramma Gaia.

Terra: And expanded it here.

Sarah: :uh-huh:

Terra: Oh, yes. I told you before I did things less than pleasing to the stomach for several years. I expanded my knowledge of nature into the Dark Arts both here and in The Great Crag.

Thailis: "Less than pleasing"? "Dark Arts"? Do you even remember what you used to do here?

Terra: Yeah...

Thailis: Do you remember your graduation ritual?

Terra: It was...um...? Didn't I...? *pause* ...ok, no.

Thrash Blood: You don't remember that?! The ground still reeks of blood from what you did!

Snarltooth: I've never seen such a display of sheer gore before or since! And we murder entire villages for fun! How can you have forgotten?!

Terra: I... *shakes her head* Now that I think about it...I don't remember a whole lot of specifics about my time here. Before and after is really clear, but...

Tirmek: This place is still weird. Where's Lilly?

Elina: Over there, talking to himself. I think the aura's gotten to him.

Lilly: *rocking slightly* :twitch: Must...not...smite. Must...learn...lesson. Danger, Will Robinson... :twitch:

Sarah: I've never seen Mom like this. She's totally ok with the obvious signs of pointless violence around the place. And Thrash Blood keeps eyeing Buttercup hungrily.

Tirmek: I get the feeling there's more going on than we realize. Best to keep on our toes.
rampant

11-28-06, 08:11 PM		Tirmek - What is the problem with unicorns? they are viscios warriors with the powers of healing and teleportation. I'd fight you for it anyday if it would get me a mount like that.

Lily - Too bad your a devil.

Tirmek - True, *sigh* observe. There there Buttercup want a sugar cube? *call snackfood* (custom power)

Buttercup - Whinny (edges away from Tirmek and closer to the ogres)

Lily - You lost to hungry ogres, :rofl:

Elina - Jeeze

Sarah - Harsh
urial angel of death

11-28-06, 09:35 PM		OOC: Will be posting Volrath's and P/Y/R's remaining children tomorrow.

By the way is there going to be any expansion on the demons being released.

Also something I realized, if Lilly cast detect evil on Terra he would be knocked out due to the HD difference. Also I was using detect evil wrong, sorry. I looked it up and it said aura strength was based on level and not amount of evil, my bad. Though Kaizer it is impossible to radiate a good and evil aura at the same time.
rampant

11-28-06, 09:39 PM		OOC : Not at the same time, one for the first cast, and another for the second. Between which a divination spoofer could be raised or dropped.
---------------------------------

Recently released flame demon escapee - I hear you guys are looking for a powerful fiendspawn.

Rakshasa Assasin - Yeah and?

Rrfde - I saw a doozy of a Half-rakshasa when the flame went out for a bit there during the big 'nid invasion.

Rakshasa Sorcerer - Can't sleep 'rines'll get me...

Rrfde - Anymore info is gonna cost you.

Rakshasa Bard - Spill, spill, spill the beans

Rrfde - Tirmek, he hangs out with the FF crew. Don't think he lives there though.
Charles Phipps

11-28-06, 10:01 PM		OOC: Will be posting Volrath's and P/Y/R's remaining children tomorrow.

By the way is there going to be any expansion on the demons being released.

Also something I realized, if Lilly cast detect evil on Terra he would be knocked out due to the HD difference. Also I was using detect evil wrong, sorry. I looked it up and it said aura strength was based on level and not amount of evil, my bad. Though Kaizer it is impossible to radiate a good and evil aura at the same time.

Lilly actually is a unusually strong version of a paladin and his "Detect Evil" ability is outright Know Alignment. His smite is also fairly "tac-nuke" levels. Plus the fact he has a Celestial Unicorn-Pegasus hybrid as his mount should key people in that he's abnormal even by paladin standards. Terra and Lisa are utterly oblivious he's an Exalted though. ;-)

As for Terra, the problem with her is the fact she has a split personality. She just doesn't realize it. That will become more important in this particular story arc.
Charles Phipps

11-28-06, 10:08 PM		Lilly: In any case, I'm going to go hunt EVIL.

Elina: Oh great.

Sarah: This never turns out well. Remember when Arijani repented and you wouldn't believe him?

Lilly: I'd rather not.

Sarah: You stalked him for a month!

***

A week ago back on the Forgotten Freedom

Lilly: *giggles manically* Eventually, Arijani will do something...EVIL....and I can kill him!

Arijani: Would you like some homemade cookies Squire Lilly?

Lilly: AH HA! POISONED COOKIES!

Arijanji: No, they're peanut butter and chocolate chip.

Lilly: YOU FIEND! TRYING TO CORRUPT US WITH YOUR HIGH FAT FOODS!

Arijani: No, these are a special diet brand!

Lilly: Oh.

***

Lilly: *shudder* Redemption...ugh.

Elina: That's....an odd paladin sentiment.

Lilly: NO ONWARD! TO FIGHT THE EVIL OF THE ORC!

Sarah: Uhh...Lilly, about the Orcs in the Eldeen Reaches. They're not normal...

*Lilly had already ridden away*

Tirmek: DO you think he's going to kill anyone?

Sarah: I doubt it. Spoony paladin has the god's favor. WHY, I don't know but they know what they're doing.

***

Later

*Lilly stalks through the forrests with a heavy crossbow*

Lilly: Be VERRRRRYYyyyy quiet. I'm hunting Orc.

Elven Maiden: EEEKKkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!

Lilly: The sound of buxom wench in need of rescuing! THIS LOOKS LIKE A JOB FOR SUPER-PALADIN!

*Lilly rushes up to find an indeed buxom and beautiful wench being menaced by a tribe of orcs lead by a powerful looking shaman*

Orc Shaman: Prepare thyself for perdition.

*Lilly pulls out a blessed crossbow and takes aim*

*Lilly also LEAPS forward*

Lilly: YOU SHALL NOT TRIUMPH FIEND!

*then OOCharles rolls a 1*

*the crossbow bolt sails square into the heart of the elf woman*

Lilly: :eek:

Elf Maiden: You've....used...the one weakness of the Rakashasa.....a blessed crossbow bolt.

*turns into a hideous tiger demon then dies*

Orc Shaman: Oh thank you! The Gatekeepers of the Great Horn Woods were prepared for an epic but futile battle against this great evil witch that has menaced us for decades. Thanks to your quick thinking, the warriors of our tribe will live!

Lilly: Uhh....you're welcome.

*whistles*

Lilly: All in a day's work.
rampant

11-28-06, 10:31 PM		Tirmek - That rule was removed with the update to 3.5 Holy+piercing just bypasses our dr (magic or piercing in my case), that insta-kill thing is so not gonna work on us.

Lily - So much for plan 2 for eliminating Tirmek.

Sarah - Then why are you wearing a hazmat?

Tirmek - (In an orange hazmat holding the crossbow with lead tongs) Instinct dies hard.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-28-06, 10:40 PM		OOC: Ok, this one's more serious than most of the rest that will encompass this arc. It's also fairly long. So what else is new. :devil:

IC:

In the northern areas of The Watchling Woods, the group comes across a corps of strange trees. Terra walks to the center and kneels, feeling the ground.

Tirmek: What is this place?

Terra: Many years ago, this was a battlefield.

Sarah: The tree leaves are blood red...

Elina: Most of them have clawmarks on them, too.

Lilly: Yes! I succeeded in my Spot Check!

Tirmek: :rolleyes: There's a first time for everything...

Lilly: Very funny. But look at what's under the claw marks.

Terra: *not even looking* They're crests of the Silver Flame...

Tirmek: ...you were here, weren't you?

Terra: Oh, yes. I met a good friend at this place. I wonder how she's doing?

Zaeurl: So you are here.

A female elf steps from the shadows of the trees. Her features are marred by old scars, but the natural beauty of her race is evident beneath them.

Terra: Zae! *hug* It's not often you walk around in this form.

Zaeurl: It's easier to talk this way. The Hags send their regards and hope you'll visit soon.

Terra: I'm still showing my guests around.

The two of them walk over to the kids as Zaeurl sniffs the air.

Zaeurl: Yours?

Terra: Just the girls. Elina, Sarah, this is Zaeurl, an old friend of mine.

Zaeurl: :smirk: Just friend?

Terra: :embarrass They don't need to hear about that.

Sarah: Ewwww...

Elina: Gross-ness...

Zaeurl: Wait a minute...*sniffs closer* They're Werewolves too?! :D

Elina: Well, we both carry it...

Sarah: But I'm the only one who manifest it.

Zaeurl: And here I thought the ears and tail were just for show. Who's the lucky guy? Do I know him?

Terra: It's a her, and no.

Zaeurl: ...why am I not surprised by this? Who are the boys?

Terra: Tirmek is their classmate and best friend. And Lilly here is my nephew.

Lilly: And their Boyfriend!

*DOUBLE WHACK*

Lilly: Ow...

Zaeurl gives both the once over, but stops at Lilly.

Zaeurl: *eyes narrow* You a Paladin, boy?

Lilly: Last time I checked.

Zaeurl growls low, and the rest of the Dark Pack appears. They circle the group slowly, never taking their eyes off Lilly or Buttercup. All the kids take up defensive stances, somewhat confused by this sudden change, but ready to defend themselves if need be.

Zaeurl: *menacingly* Answer me this, Terra. Why are you with him? And why should we not tear him to shreds right now?

Terra: He's under my tutilage. He is also under my care. You fight him, you deal with me. Call them off, Zae. He is not your enemy.

After staring at Terra for a moment, she signals to the group. They stop circling, but remain in their positions.

Zaeurl: What happened to you? You're so different. I can no longer feel that magnificent rage just below the surface. The smell of blood no longer haunts your steps. And...your eyes...disturb me.

Terra: I can't remain the same forever, Zae. I found that killing Paladins is counter productive. You only reinforce the very anger that killed your family.

At the mention of her family, Zaeurl's eyes flare red and she bears her fangs.

Zaeurl: Who are you to talk like that?! How many did you slaughter here?! How many of their still beating hearts did you tear from their chests?!

Terra: Twenty three.

Tirmek: Wait a minute...

Out of curiosity, he had counted the strange trees with red leaves and claw marks. They numbered exactly twenty three.

Tirmek: Are these trees...bound souls?

Terra: Not exactly. I was sent by the Hags along with a contingent of their forces to head off a group of crusaders during the height of the the Purges. We found Lycans in a losing battle against a legion of fanatics. We massacred them and I bound each of my victims into tree seeds. Their minds and souls will remain here till the grove dies.

The girls stare at their mother blankly as Zeaurl walks over to Lilly and looks him in the eye. She points to the remnants of a scar on her forehead. It looks vaguely like that of the symbol of the Silver Flame.

Zaeurl: Do you see this, boy? One of those "champions of good and light" carved this into me.

Lilly: I follow Dol Arrah.

Zaeurl: *spits at his feet* You're all the same. Feel lucky you're not alone.

Terra: Back off, Zae. It was over one hundred and seventy years ago. All of them are long dead. The Church has changed. It's about time you did too.

Zaeurl: One hundred years or one thousand, it doesn't matter! I will never forgive them!

After the initial shock of hearing the cruelty their mother once visited upon members of their other mother's Order, the girls once again find their voice.

Sarah: Momma would never do that.

Zaeurl: ...what?

Elina: Momma is a Silver Flame Paladin. She carries dormant Lycanthropy and passed in to us.

Zaeurl: You enslaved and even impregnated a Paladin of the Silver Flame?! Well done!

Terra: She is no slave. She is my soulmate.

At this, Zaeurl steps back. A look of absolute fury crosses her face as she shifts to hybrid form.

Zaeurl: Leave this place.

Terra: Zae! She is not like those that killed your family! She is no blind fanatic!

Zaeurl: I said LEAVE, traitor! Never show your face to me again! I will rend the flesh from your bones myself!

She signals the pack again, and they ready themselves to attack Lilly.

Zaeurl: As a warning, we will take this one. Be thankful we leave the rest unharmed.

Tirmek, Sarah, and Elina surround Lilly and Buttercup as over a dozen full grown Werewolves bear down on them. The sadness on Terra's face is evident as she speaks again.

Terra: I don't want to fight you, but I cannot let you harm him.

The Were's freeze in place, bound by their own shadows. They are then thrown back with unnatural strength. Terra's wings emerge and her voice takes on a commanding tone.

Terra: I am disappointed in you, Zae. I thought you might be better than those you despise. Too bad you're just like them.

With those words, the group disappears in a flash of light. The pack regroups as Zaeurl shifts to full wolf form and slinks away into the woods. That look was one she never expected to see upon the face of the killer she once admired. If she didn't know better, she would have thought Terra was crying when she left...
rampant

11-28-06, 11:04 PM		Tirmek - That went better than it could have.

Lily - They almost ate me!

Tirmek - I know, i hate it when people get my hopes up.

Lily - exactly.. wait one moment

Tirmek - Still kinda reminded me of my mother.

Terra - Yeah only less scary.

Tirmek - You should see her in a bad mood.

Everyone ponders that for a moment.

Lily - I think I speak for everyone when I say: meep

Tirmek - Shame we had to leave though, I thought for a moment I'd be able to return to my natural form.

Lily - why would you want to?

Elina - He looks weird without fur.

Sarah - And his hands are all screwed up.

Lily - First time he's looked normal.

Tirmek - I feel naked, and overdressed at the same time. Now I know why Maladren doesn't like using it all the time.
---------------------------

Zaeurl - Razza fragging huh?

Enter the mindscape

Tirmek (in his disguise as a dark haired young half-elf) - You really need to work on your people skills.

Zaeurl - Oh sweet frag a psychic:nonono:

Tirmek - Lay off the caffeine lady.

Zaeurl - Why are you in my head?

Tirmek - 2 reasons, one: i had to try out this new power, two: you remind me of my mother but I'm too scared of her to sass back.

Zaeurl - Great:rolleyes: , a cheeky psychic.

Tirmek - There's other kinds?

Zaeurl - :uh-huh:

Tirmek - Everybody and their dog is a critic. Anyway :P, Also why couldn't you eat the paladin first and ask questions later! HE WAS ALMOST OUT OF MY FUR!
Charles Phipps

11-28-06, 11:39 PM		OOC: Bravo Kaizer.

And Tirmek is in rare form in those last two posts.

Lilly: Curses, I wasted my only Bolt of Tirmek Slaying.

Tirmek: Huh?

Lilly: Oh sorry, *speaks louder* I WASTED MY ONLY BOLT OF TIRMEK SLAYING.

Tirmek: Just so we know where we stand.

Lilly: Yeah.

*Tirmek trips Lilly and pushes him in the mud*

Terra: It's like Calvin and Hobbes' New Adventures.
rampant

11-28-06, 11:49 PM		Tirmek - You ain't seen nothing yet! :evillaugh:

Lily - Hey your alignment is good!

Tirmek - Fringe benefit for fiend bloods, we get to keep the laugh regardless of alignment. Ok 1 and 2 and go!

Tirmek, Elina, and Sarah - :evillaugh:

Lily - I hate being left out.:mad:
Charles Phipps

11-28-06, 11:55 PM		Lilly: Well that went well.

Terra: How...could they...

Lilly: Observation: they're evil.

Terra: SHUT UP! THEY'RE NO DIFFERENT THAN THE FANATICS WHO KILLED THEM.

Lilly: Whom were also evil. Terra, redemption is beautiful and wonderful. I understand this. War should always be a last resort. However, the role of a paladin is meant to be a protector. The most tragic thing is for a victim to become a victimizer....but it happens.

Tirmek: Surprisingly insightful for a narrow minded fanatic.

Lilly: Well, occasionally, I have my moments. Every couple of centuries the gods send a Chosen one to even the balance between Good and Evil. Jarlot is Khyber's champion. Aerith is Arrawai's champion. Mordain Fleshweaver is the manifestation of the Mockery. Supposedly, the Fury's Champion is someone I'm destined to meet. I'm not sure what she'll be like though. I mean how many heinous nature loving demonic b*tches are out there anyway?

Tirmek: *looks at Terra who seems oblivious*

Elina: Mom...I know she was your friend.

Terra: I just have to make them understand. Once they know then they'll be able to show everyone that things are different now.

Sarah: Who?

Terra: The Hags.

***

Rose: Wait....LILLY is the champion of Dol Arrah?

Aerith: err...yes.

Rose: How'd that work out?

Aerith: Well, we sort of accidentally activated him about a decade sooner than expected.

Rose: Oh brother...

Aerith: Now's probably not a good time to reveal that Achika is the last remaining survivor of the Mirron bloodline except for the Keeper of the Dark Flame....whom is now old and dying.

Rose: Wait, you mean I sent Tira's great great gre....etc grandson into the one place he's needed most by the forces of evil?
rampant

11-29-06, 12:03 AM		Kithle - I love it when a plan comes together, thanks for getting Lily's paperwork messed up.

13 - it was too good an opportunity.:D
Kaizer_Ryu

11-29-06, 12:33 AM		OOC: Terra was originally meant to be someone's champion (not the Fury, though), but things didn't turn out as expected. I'll finally be explaining her new role in the cosmos by the end of this arc.

EDIT: Something I was going to mention to urial earlier, then forgot.

Since when have we let things being impossible stand in the way of doing them so long as the characters personality integrity is maintained? :P :D

I just think that with her being the impossible combination of Demon and Angel (and the sides aren't at war with each other), she should be able to radiate whatever one is cast (Detect Evil/Good). If Lilly cast Know Alignment, she'd come up as True Neutral. Probably still with evil tendancies, but not so much anymore.
rampant

11-29-06, 01:20 AM		Dorvos is running around in a grey torso wrap with two slots on his back, and a pair of black shorts.

Satnak - Gotcha tickle tickle

Dorvos - hmm hmm hmm

Serene - Ooh He's finally old enough to join us on the FF yay! (think about 5-6)

-------------------

Satnak - Good to be back home.

Dorvos pokes John with a living crysthral tendril.

John - ... How do you respond to this?:(
Paulon

11-29-06, 01:25 AM		A wave of papers covered in arcane figures follows Ketler out of his lab, as he hastens to the Probability Drive. Clutched in his fingers is a single piece of parchment, the figure thereupon the result of days of calculation, accounting for every variable conceivable. With trembling fingers he punches in the value, and activates the Drive.

The Drive is illuminated with an eerie green nimbus, fading to blue at the edges. Across Eberron reality seems to flicker as the Probability Drive sorts through realities, seeking to create the situation that Ketler desires. A Cyre without the Mourning, a sane Kanatash, Rajahs victorious, a living Vol, the Prophecy never created... for instants all exist, then are gone again into the mix of maybes.

And the Probability Drive whimpers. Reforging itself via its own power the device creates an rune-encrusted tube, sealed at one end, with the open end pointing at itself. There is a click.

The resulting explosion rivals any of the multitude of destructions rained on Sharn by the Forgotten Freedom. Yet sitting Pholly-like in the middle of the blast zone after it clears is Ketler, unharmed, still clutching his parchment.

Though somewhat burned by the explosive suicide of the Probability Drive, some of the writing on the parchment is still visible: "Prob*****ty that I wi** 'get' Jae-"
rampant

11-29-06, 01:41 AM		Paulon your corruption is complete. Happy birthday.
-------------------------------------------------------------

Ketler - ...:mad: REMAN!
Kaizer_Ryu

11-29-06, 03:18 AM		On the slopes of the Byeshk Mountains:

Sarah: Are we there yet?

Terra: Almost, hon.

Elina: You said that fifteen minutes ago.

Terra: Five minutes. And believe me, it's worth the wait.

Tirmek: Can't you just fly us there?

Terra: There are nasty crosswinds that can hit you out of nowhere up here. The Harpy's know how to avoid them, but they've lived in this area for thousands of years. Lilly, stop kicking rocks and watch your step. I don't need you falling to your death.

Lilly: *kick* Fine.

*RUMBLE FROM BELOW*

Sarah: What was that?

Terra: Must have been a land slide deeper in the canyon.

-----

In the canyon far below them:

Ogre Barbarian: :weep: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! :weep:

Ogre Mage: Our Khyber shards have been destroyed! Without those, we'll never be able to bind the Daelkyr that sleeps beneath the ruins of Karthoon Tor for our ritual to open a portal to Xoriat!

Medusa Cleric: I told you morons we shouldn't take such precious cargo through the Canyon of Crumbly Walls but NO! "We'll be fine" you said! "What's the worst that could happen" you said! Well you've gone and made a bloody mess of things now!

Harpy Druid: *muffled from beneath the rocks* I'm still trapped in here! My wing's broken and I think there's something crawling on my le-OH UNHOLY GODS IT'S EATING ME!!! GET IT OFF!!!! OH YE GODS THE PAIN!!!!!

There is no trace of the other three save for the dust clouds.

-----

Sarah: Wow... You were right Mom. This is cool.

The group stands at the peak of one of the mountains, gazing over the Eldeen Reaches as the sun sets.

Lilly: It's quite romantic, don't you think? *wink wink at Elina*

Elina: :rolleyes: Gag.

Lilly: :raincloud:

Sarah: Hey, Tirmek. I bet I can throw farther than you!

Tirmek: You're on.

Elina: I'll take that bet.

Lilly: Don't leave me out of it!

Sarah and Tirmek heave their rocks quite a distance. Elina doesn't do so bad either. Lilly fumbles on his throw roll and his rock goes falling down the mountainside.

-----

Ogre Mage: *huff* *huff* Do you think *pant* we should keep running?

Medusa Cleric: *pant* It's probably going to *gasp* take a bit to feed, so we can break here.

Ogre Barbarian: Should we have left her there?

Medusa Cleric: And get eaten ourselves?

Ogre Barbarian: Good point.

*CRACK*

The Ogre Barbarian is hit in the head with a rock and falls over.

Ogre Mage: The hell?!

*CRACK*

The Medusa Cleric is taken down in similar fashion.

Ogre Mage: :eek: Run awa-!

*CRACK*

And down he goes.

-----

The Harpy drags herself along, the head of a strange creature attached to her leg.

Harpy Druid: *&^%@ing bastards, leaving me behind! If I make it out of this I'm SO going to kill them!

At this time, the rock Lilly dropped strikes a large boulder overhead, sending it and several tons of rock careening towards the unfortunate cultist.

Harpy Druid: :weep: Why? :weep:

-----

Lilly: Ok, I got it this time!

*Natural 20*

Lilly: Yes!

-----

Medusa Cleric: Ugh. They're both dead. Useless layabouts. Good riddens. Now if I can just get the bleeding to stop, I should make it back in time to break that Obelisk before the Gatekeepers show up aga-

*CRACK*

And she's down for good.

-----

Tirmek: Is it odd to anyone else how we keep getting EXP but we're not doing anything to earn it?

Sarah: You're complaining?

Tirmek: No, it's just...nevermind. *to himself* I need to stop worrying so much...
Norr

11-29-06, 08:00 AM		OOC: I wonder how many lurkers like lordalm and Paulon we have? Not complaining, just curious.

OOC: A lot. Going back a long time :D
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-29-06, 08:06 AM		OOC:……Also something I realized, if Lilly cast detect evil on Terra he would be knocked out due to the HD difference. Also I was using detect evil wrong, sorry. I looked it up and it said aura strength was based on level and not amount of evil, my bad. Though Kaizer it is impossible to radiate a good and evil aura at the same time.
*knock, knock*

OUrial goes to the door.

OOUrial: Hello?

Naggat: Hel-lo-o? :bored: Forgotten Freedom, we don't give a damn about the rules? Especially ones dealing with alignment.
Gladius_Lucix

11-29-06, 08:18 AM		The explosion caused by Ketler's "misuse" of the Probability Drive wakes Liam from his mope.

Liam: What did you DO?!?! Do you know how long I worked on that?

Ketler: Umm...

Liam: That was my life's work!

Ketler: But-

Liam: No, no forgiveness this time. Time to remove your stain forever.

Liam pulls out the same wand that he used on the Space Marines during the incursion.

Ketler: You can't! I'm a named character.

OOGladius: He's right. You'll just have to figure out some other way to punish him.

Ketler: *whew* Thanks.

OOGladius: Don't thank me yet. Liam still has Kithle, Terrek, and 13 on retainer from Michael's little patent violation.

Ketler: eep.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-29-06, 08:24 AM		13: So, Elina and Lilly, unlikely?

Silver: All I've got to say is: :zzz: .

OOcat: :confused: What happend to the :pile:-crazed goddess?

Silver: :rolleyes: Oh please. With someone of Elina's power I'd never get the hormones high enough to have the right effect. Now if they have an existing connection, like Sarah and Tirmek, much easier.

Bunny: The lycanthropic purges, the battles against daelkyric abberations, rakasahas…:weep: good times.

13: Terra's certainly got a violent past.

Bunny: Interesting thing, I may encourage violence, it's still up to people to decide if they want to do it. Plus it helps get rid of the fanatics.

Silver: Ramen to that.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-29-06, 08:28 AM		OOGladius: Don't thank me yet. Liam still has Kithle, Terrek, and 13 on retainer from Michael's little patent violation.
13: I think what Ketler needs is a girlfriend.

Terrek: Wouldn't that simply be giving into his demands?

Kithle: That is why you're the god. :devil:

13: Whu-pssssh!

Terrek: Oh, I get it now………………:devil:

The light fades in a dramatic way so that only their faces are left (with glowing smiles on those who have them), and then tey too fade out.
Charles Phipps

11-29-06, 08:50 AM		OOCharles: You're right. Elina has no reason to be attracted to Lilly.

Lilly: You're going to introduce a rival love interest for us?

Kaizer Ryu: Ten!

OOCharles: Yes, behold....MIKO THE TEN YEAR OLD HALF FIEND BLACKGUARD!

*eleven year old Goth girl in schoolgirl outfit growls*

Miko: You're all fools.

Lilly::love:

Elina: :love:

Lilly: Ah....crap.

OOCharles: You know I've noticed that the universe solely exists to hurt Lilly.

Lilly: I'm not so silly, it just LARGELY exists to hurt Lilly.

Elina: Actually, my main problem with Lilly is the fact that he has a lot more common with Sarah. I'm the sort of bookish Hermione nerd.

Satnak: You are?

Elina: Yep! Sarah gets to be the fun tomboy type.

Lilly: A typical date with Elina consists of...

*the two sit in the library and read fantasy novels*

Ivy: GAH! Brother! You're wearing GLASSES!

Elina: And Ivy is a lot nicer to me because he's not showering attention on sarah as well as using corny lines.

Lilly: It's not that I don't appreciate you more Elina. It's just...err...

Elina: Oh Gods! It's because you think I'm too smart for you!

Lilly: Well you ARE. Everytime we talk, you're always going over my head with common sense. I try very hard to please everyone and you're always riding my case!

Elina: MAYBE YOU SHOULD STOP BEING A MORON!

Lilly: At least I'm trying to help!

Elina: You're a crappy paladin whom shouldn't be allowed ANYWHERE *NEAR* weaponry. You're a rotten wizard too!

Lilly: Fine, we're finished!

Elina: FINE!

*they stomp off*

Lilly: :weep:

Elina: :weep:

OOCharles: Huh and I didn't even get to my plot that Elina is the Shadow's Champion that Lilly was set up by the gods to eventually slay.

Rose: What!?

OOCharles: Elina's future self is to become the Evil Queen of Eberron. It's part of her destiny and one of the reasons she was able to manipulate the Silver Flame. Lilly's going to find out when he visits the Dark Flame that he's supposed to kill Elina when she's an adult.

Miko: Well we know what to do now to deal with that!
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

11-29-06, 09:25 AM		Liam "Oh, Ash, you were intrested in trying a wirsian powered psi amp?"

Ash "Much good tat it would curently do, but yes. Sadly however the once roaring conflargaraion of my madness the fueled my power is gone. Ironic... I hungered for years to be free of it, and now I am I feel incomplete."

Liam "So your sane? and thats stoping you frm using yuor psion powers... And your afraid hooking your psionic lobe up to the concerted madness of this ship will have no effect? Wow yuor self confidant. Come on I have a test rig ready let me hook you up, you'll soon be creaping every one out and incinerating things just like before."

Liam and the ducttape swarm begin fastening a hose to Ash's forehead and to a large devise, then surounding him with reading and measuring devises.

Liam "Ready?"

Ash "Comense"

Liam retreats behind a wall, flips a switch. There is a roar of pain, a smell of burning feathers, but nothing else.

Ash "Sweetmercyfull pain... Turn it iff, the flesh charss, the thought do not..."

Liam drops the switch, begins studying the read outs. "This, this is strange, you felt no power at all?"

Ash "None, only my plumage scorching"

Liam "ah, yes, should have included an earth wire, sorry about that... Any way from thses readings, I dont think it was the Tyranids stopping you from acessing your power. You say you've been trying to dampen your pyromania?"

Ash "I killed, many, a city turned to ash and clinker... I fought since taht point to master the flames"

Liam "Theres your problem, the power is there, but every time you get close to greating enough psichic pressure to manafest the self laothing cuts in, breaks yor concentration. You need to stop thinnking of ash and Ra-tok as sepaerate beings, stop hating the part if you that burns, or this is it... Good luck"

Ash "My thanks, your council is wise"

(ooc: Every one, feel free to mess with Ash on his new Quest. )
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-29-06, 09:59 AM		13 (wearing a crude Ash mask): Oh! Woe! I am no longer an insane pyromaniac and shall therefore become a brooding nobody!

OOcat: Not that any of us think sanity is a good thing, it's just that sane people are so easy to make fun of.

Silver: Miko. Well, either you just chose a random Japanese name, or someone is ripping off OOTS again. But who cares, fresh blood! :evillaugh

Miko: Bite me.

Tirmek: (i.h.h. Hmm, a broody half-fiend girl.)

OOcat: I thought you weren't going to ruin a good thing.

Silver: I'm not doing anything. :confused:

13: (quickly hides the strings behind es back) *whisles "Beer, Beer, Beer"*

Sarah: That can be arranged. :mad: (i.h.h. I hate her already.)

Silver: No, sorry, being a half can't be spread by the bite. Really, being a were at all shouldn't be spread that way. I mean, it causes some interesting cases—

Caralot: :D

Silver: —but not what I started out to do.

Bunny: Please, don't ask. I was there, I know what happened.

13: This whole "Elina is the Shadow's champion" thing is going to work up the dramadar big time. (secretly adds the dramadar on his speed-dial)

Silver: Well, it might help her attract a nice girl. The whole "angsty, brooding villain" should work for women too.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-29-06, 10:53 AM		OOC: Elina as the Shadow's champion. You have no idea how creepily close that idea is to something I've been tossing around for a bit. However, I suggest not doing anything with it till after this arc. You'll all see why.

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! :evillaugh :plotting:
Charles Phipps

11-29-06, 11:22 AM		OOC: A brief glimpse into the future for you guys.

Twenty years down the road

*Lilly stands on the deck of the Forgotten Freedom that has become buried in the side of the Demon Waste's Mountains and been transformed into a kind of strange looking Castle. Lilly has now slicked down blonde hair like Spike from Buffy, a long trenchcoat, a upper crust Brelish Accent, and is chain smoking*

*Speaking to him is Aerith channeling Dol Arrah's spirit*

Dol Arrah: I would have words with you Chosen One.

'Larry' Rosewood: Yeah, I have some choice words for you. The first word starts with letter F and the last word is you. I've served you and the rest of you pompous talking heads for twenty years and it's brought me but the smoke and the dead. Where the hell is the Paradise you people promised us?

Dol Arrah: The Sovereign Host works in mysterious ways.

'Larry' Rosewood: Yeah and the Sovereign Host can kiss my sorry a...

Dol Arrah: *AHEM*

'Larry' Rosewood: So, it's important I now tender my resignation.

Dol Arrah: You're no longer a paladin?

'Larry' Rosewood: Not quite. I'm now a free agent.

Dol Arrah: :uh huh:

'Larry' Rosewood: I figure someone can match this deal better than you people. For example, as a wizard I now have this snazzy Ring of Atonement.

Dol Arrah: A what now?

'Larry' Rosewood: It automatically casts atonement whenever I do something against the paladin's code. So long as I do more good than bad. I'm covered.

Dol Arrah: That's insane!

'Larry' Rosewood: So's what you let happen to Elina.

Dol Arrah: Elina made her choice.

'Larry' Rosewood: Thundersaur s***. She was a girl when she made her choice and you just propped her up to be the villain in this unfolding drama so you could scare more people into worshipping your sorry asses. I'm wise to your con game.

Dol Arrah: You are pledged to serve us.

'Larry' Rosewood: I'm pledged to serve HUMANITY. If that's not good enough for you then let me pay for the next dozen suckers.

*flips a copper off the front of Dol Arrah's head*

Dol Arrah: I'm sensing some hostility.

*A growling warrior Rakashasa covered in bandoliers of stakes with a giant crossbow across his back growls with saber tooth tusks behind Lilly*

Tirmek: The Armies of the Mourning are coming Lilly.

'Larry' Rosewood: Let me stop to visit the grave of my children. Then we can go kill their asses. For the fat lot of good it'll do to us.

Tirmek: Let us remind them that good does not always mean wuss.

'Larry' Rosewood: Good, evil, we're the guys with the guns.
Charles Phipps

11-29-06, 11:37 AM		twenty years ahead

*In a dark and gloomy palace erected from blackened stone and the bones of the dead*

Queen Elina D'Vol: Miko, I need your help.

*A eleven year old girl with straight black hair, Sarlona features, and a decidedly ****ed look to her face walks in*

Miko: Everything is pointless and sucks.

Queen Elina D'Vol: I see your Blackguard training is going well.

Miko: I hate you! You're mean and stuck up! NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ME!

Queen Elina D'Vol: Or you're being a typical adolescent.

Miko: I want my own cell phone.

Queen Elina D'Vol: Your mission is to go back in time and help along my corruption to evil.

Miko: You didn't have to wear hoopskirts when you were a girl right? That was like centuries ago anyway.

Queen Elina D'Vol: I'm reminded of Wellgiving when you refused to eat the roast owlbear.

Miko: I'm a vegan.

Queen Elina D'Vol: WHOEVER HEARD OF A VEGAN BLACKGUARD!?

Miko: b***.

Queen Elina D'Vol: You must also destroy Lilly before he becomes an irritating thorn in my side.

Miko: You're just mad because he shot your general in the face during his monologue.

Queen Elina D'Vol: That's against the rules!

Miko: Well he is a boy and that means I have ample ability to crush his hopes and dreams before grinding him to pieces.

Queen Elina D'Vol: Now go through this time portal.

Miko: *pops out cute little black bat wings and flies on in*
rampant

11-29-06, 12:05 PM		Kithle - Someone needs a hug! Aerith!

Aerith - Awww your such a cutie

Miko - Get away from me you crazy *****. OH SWEET NAMELESS ONES IT BURNS THE HUGS IT BURNS!
Norr

11-29-06, 12:13 PM		OOCNorr: The broody the bird needs to find an ashram to meditate on things.

OOcat: I just found this picture of Olidammara, anyone else thinks that looks like Spoony? picture (http://www.wizards.com/dnd/images/dd_gallery/dd1/Olidammara_p89.jpg)

OOCNorr: The spoony GOD of spoony bards. It's true! Spooniness is nothing less than a divine attribute!
---
High above Eberron, the imperial cruiser still lie dead in the water. The squirrel fleet is closing in.

Comm-officer: Marshal, sir, we are recieving a transmission form the approaching battalion.

Marshal Hemp: On screen, soldier.

The screen flickers, and a large, hairy face appears.

Marshal Hemp: :eek: What is the meaning of this!?

Squirrel Commander: Squirk chirp cirrup squek squeaker squick, aru rup cirrup squirk. (Greetings Marshal. We are the Squirrel civilization. Prepare to be assimilated. Resistance is futile.)

Marshal Hemp: What is this? is this a joke?Show yourself or I will demand satisfaction!

Xenolexicon: Um... Sir?

Marshal Hemp: Quiet soldier!

The face on the screen moves back a little, revealing a staff of squirrels maintaining arcane terminals. He squeaks a short sentence to one of the other squirrels. The Squirrel Commander turns back to the screen.

Squirrel Commander: Squirk chirrup squerr...krzz chrhrhc...mmander. Since you have proved to be unwilling to leave our world alone, we, the Squirrel Civilization, have been forced to take action. As you undoubtedly know, our fleet is not on intercept course with your vessel. We now give you and your crew the option of surrender, should you accept it. If not, you will be annihilated in the most squirrel manner possible and your cruiser, or whats left of it, will be siezed on our behalf. You have 10 minutes to comply.

Marshal Hemp *turns to one of his officers*: How big did you say these ships were?

Officer: the largest do not seem to be more than 1000 feet long, sir.

Marshal Hemp: Very well. This joke has gone too far already, and I will not allow any enemy of the divine Emperor to play such tricks on us. *to the screen* Whoever you are to mock the Emperor, we will never surrender!

Squirrel Commander: How sad, I almost thought you would do this the easy way. Now we'll do it our way.
Transmission Terminated

The squirrel fleet close in on the imperial fighters.

FX Demon: The battle (http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/showdown#start)raged on for a cen-tury (or a few hours at least), many lives were claimed but eventua-lly, the champion stood, the rest saw their better, Squirrel Civ in bloodstained sweaters...

As expected, a full fourth of the imperial fighters proved to be out of commission as the battle started, and a about a fith more surrendered immediately. As the last drop-pods left the cruiser it was boarded by squirrel cavalry, ravagers and sappers. The saboteur that had previously contacted the squirrel fleet was still on-board, and helped with the takeover as mobile air support.
The gargantuan cruiser itself was taken in less than two hours, mainly because of its size. It later became ISSS1, the first Intercontinental Squirrel Space Station.
As the Marshal was carried off by a horde of squirrels, most of the remaining crew surrendered. They are presently spread all over Khorvaire, embracing their new life free from repression (except in Karrnath, which became a popular vacation resort for homesick veterans).
The Squirrel Thing was soon admitted into the newly founded airforce as a 2nd luitenant, in charge of aerial snipers and bombers along with his fellow officers, in time develpoing the 'spectre gun-eagle'.
Of Marshal Hemps fate few know, kowledge that may only be passed on during drunken parties, to the general laughter of the crowd.
Charles Phipps

11-29-06, 12:23 PM		OOC: Tragically, that's pretty close to Rose as imagined.

Hehehe, burning hug.
Gladius_Lucix

11-29-06, 01:30 PM		Liam looks over the wreckage of his Probability Drive.

Liam: This doesn't look good. I'm not even sure it's salvageable. Maybe a different source of nigh infinite power is the way to go.

Liam glances over at the Cascade Engine, and is struck by an idea. Rubbing the back of his head, he starts his standard build monologue. Unfortunately, not even the Swarm is around to hear him.

Liam: I've been measuring the reality warping inside the Cascade Engine by comparing it to Xoriat. What if I just toss one into Xoriat? Let's see, a Collector, set to a wide radius, a Sheild, set relatively small, and a Weirsan maintained Gate ... That could work! Just needs some sort of limitter on the power flow- No, just use the Sheild to sink any unused power.

Before Liam gets to work, though, he glances over at the map, and sees Ash's Weirsan signature walking away. It does seem slightly different.

Liam: What if hooked up the Weirsan Negator to the Weirsan Signature Databanks? If I used it to set the victim's Weirsan Signature to match that of someone else, I wonder what would happen? Or does that occur naturally here, generating the Alts? Darn it, Swarm, where are you? I need someone to help me remember these!

OOGladius: What about me?

Liam: You're even more likely to forget!

OOGladius: But I can go back and examine your past any time I want.

Liam: You'll still forget, and you won't remember when this is.
rampant

11-29-06, 01:58 PM		OORampant - uhhhhhhggg

Silver - What's his problem?

13 - :D time travel gives him migraines.

Bunny - I hoping he'll burst an important blood vessel.
------------------------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Do the hags have problems with Rakshasa?

Terra - As long as you don't set yourself up as competition.

Tirmek - So no challenging them to a chess match?

Terra - Winning might be a bad idea.

Tirmek - Bloody Mol.
--------------------------

OOC: Quick thing is Miko on the FF? or did Terra just pick up another one?
Charles Phipps

11-29-06, 02:17 PM		OOC: I'm inclined to say Terra.
Chrys

11-29-06, 03:00 PM		D’Ducky stands on the deck of the forgotten freedom… pacing back and forth and muttering to him self.

Lisa: I know I’m going to regret this but what is with you…

D’Ducky: Oh I’m waiting for my daughter to show up for a visit.

Lisa: Wait… you have a daughter?

D’Ducky: Yep, I got a letter form my ex-wife saying it would better if I had her for a bit… she’s about 15.

Lisa: Ex-Wife? P/Y/R Told me she took your black book away from Volrath, you have a lot of Ex don’t you.

D’Ducky: Yep Lots of girlfriends; But only one Ex-Wife * sigh * haven’t had a girlfriend since then.

Lisa: What happen?

D’Ducky: Oh it wasn’t working out… she was personification of Lawful Evil; I’m a Life Slaad … Those like a Death Slaad but Chaotic Good. Oh well it was a good Fifty years… till her dad broke us up.

Lisa: Oh…when was the last time you saw your daughter?

D’Ducky: About a Year and a half… Yeah My Ex’s Dad didn’t like my daughter’s choice of class; so that’s why my daughter is coming here.

Lisa: So you’re not a Raving Sex maniac?

D’Ducky: Why does every one think that, yes I have had a huge number of girlfriends but I’m a few thousand years old so they tend to add up after that long…I mean like half of them are dead.

Lisa: Err…moving on. So what Class did you daughter pick?

D’Ducky: Paladin, but she has come bardic abilities too.

A portal opens up and what looks like a stunning young girl walks through. Then screams and Tackle-Hugs D’Ducky.

D’Ducky: So what’s with Looking like a human? Oh Lisa this is Aero my Daughter.

Aero: Oh mommy said it might be best to look human when I first got here. Can I change in to my normal form? I hate wearing pants.
D’Ducky: Sure go head.

Aero turns in to her normal form that of a Lillend except her wings is a rainbow of dark colors, her tail is fork and she has a small pair of horns.

Lisa: Ah Now I don’t have to ask about the pant comment. So how does a Slaad and what I assume to be a Devil end up being a Lillend?

D’Ducky: Oh she takes after my mother… who was a Lillend… when a Slaad implants an Egg in a Good outsider a Life Slaad is born.

Aero: Who’s she?

D’Ducky: That is Lisa… she is kind of like the ships resident Paladin.

Aero: Neat.

Lisa: Well at lest I don’t Think I’ll have the ‘Smite first ask question later’ Problem with you.

Aero: Oh No, I don’t smite people I use my smite per day as extra bardic music. I also can’t detect evil… I detect magic instead.

Aero Half Devil Lillend Paladin 1... Yes she is Lawful Good
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-29-06, 03:36 PM		OOC: Tragically, that's pretty close to Rose as imagined.
OOcat: It was the resemblence to Will Turner that gave it away.

Rose: :weep: I am not Will Turner!
*****
Twenty years from now

Bunny stand on a field of battle, wearing sunglasses and a leather jacket. He glances at his watch.

Bunny: D*mn angsties. They always have to spend time brooding before a battle. I just hope Lilly doesn't try to kick my *** like last time. It never manages to catch him off guard long enough for the enemy to get in a good shot. How many times do I have to say that killing Elina was part of the job? Why is it that people just can't understand that if I played favorites the entire multiverse would quickly spiral into dust?
******
Back in the present

Bunny surveys the wreckage of the space battle.

Bunny: That'll do, squirrels, that'll do.
******
Aerith finally lets go of Miko, who runs away as fast as she can.

Miko: *pant, pant*

13: Hello. :D

Miko: Go away and leave me alone, freak.

13: Sorry, can't do that. You're emo, that means I have to make your life hell to justify your continued pessimism and hostile indifference. :P
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-29-06, 04:02 PM		13: So Lilly is the Chosen One? Well good work on getting that post!

Lilly: Ah, well thanks. I didn't expect to get a complement from you, but thanks.

13: Oh, yeah, I think you'll fit the part really well.

Lilly: :D

13: In honor of you, I'll have my minstrel troupe sing The Chosen One song.

Lilly: You have your own minstrel troupe?

13 snaps es fingers. A couple of squirrels in silly outfits line up along the rocks and begin singing:

The Chosen One song (http://www.thebardstale.com/soundtrack%5Csong_chosenone_01.mp3)
rampant

11-29-06, 04:31 PM		Terrek - WHO KEEPS COOSING YOU PEOPLE!!!:rant:

Lily - I'm sensing a lack of respect for this title.

Everyone - Ya think!!:rolleyes:
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-29-06, 04:45 PM		Terrek - WHO KEEPS COOSING YOU PEOPLE!!!:rant:
13: :devil:
lordalm

11-29-06, 06:27 PM		It has been posted that I am a Lurker. :eek:

I was unaware I was a lurker and wish to be delurked. :allalone:

If someone could kindly point me to the Lurkers Anounyms or 12 step progrom for delurking....:bigeyes:
Charles Phipps

11-29-06, 07:05 PM		Aerith: Ivy, I have a confession to make.

Ivy: Oh?

Aerith: You're the Chosen One of the Keeper.

Ivy: NO!

Bunny: Yes, you are. I've Chosen you to get me Tim Hortons. Step up!

;-)
rampant

11-29-06, 07:20 PM		I didn't mean it like a bad thing, I was just curious. I didn't think Lurker was an insult. I wasn't complaining, It just a random thought!
---------------------------------------

Miko - Ok who is this and why is he in charge?

Elina - Mom had to take care of something so she left Tirmek in charge.

Miko - Why him?

Elina - You popped out of nowhere, Sarah would wander off, I can't stop her, and butter cup can't talk.

Tirmek - *call stick* Fetch (throws stick out aways but still within sight)

Sarah - Gotta get the stick! *yoink*

Lily - Wht not me?

Miko - You just answered your own question.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-29-06, 08:26 PM		Aerith: You're the Chosen One of the Keeper.

Ivy: NO!

Bunny: Yes, you are.
OOC: You get a :looloo: award for best ironic-twist-use of a Commentary Crewmember.
I've Chosen you to get me Tim Hortons. Step up!
Silver: Personally I prefer P.F. Chang's.

13: I like any fast food, so long as it's clear the job is menial.
rampant

11-29-06, 08:42 PM		Dorvos - (pokes Spoony)

Rose - MY NAME IS ROSE!

Ketler - Why you putting up with that boss?

Rose - Because his mother is right there.

Satnak - *glare*

Serene - Hi
rampant

11-29-06, 09:31 PM		Aero on base

Dorvos on Keyboard

Ivy is the drums

It's the Fogotten Freedom's own, The Frozen Flares!

Sponsored by dragonmeat den, thurysday nights are half off if you bring your own weapon.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-29-06, 10:01 PM		OOC: Since Miko comes from a possible future where Elina is the supposed Queen of All Evil or some such nonsense, I figured I'd have a go at that. And I'm fitting it into the current story arc! Yay me!

IC:

Twenty years ahead

Queen Elina D'Vol: Now that Miko is off to ensure my ascention, perhaps I should check in on my "guests". Gregory!

Gregory: *his eyes hollow, his armor black* Yes, my Lady.

Elina: Bring the traitor to me.

He bows and leaves as she sits in a large chair at the end of the audience chamber. A few minutes later, he drags a somewhat familiar young man into the chamber by a chain. A collar enchanted with the Silence spell is tied around his neck, his wrists are bound, and a blood seal is plastered on his forehead to restrain his mythril shifting abilities. A mixture of fear and anger sits on his face.

Elina: *stands and walks towards him* Ah, Dorvos, good to see you. I hope you've found the comforts of my dungeon to be to your liking. No? Oh, that's too bad.

She stands in front of him, giving him a look of mock concern. She reaches out to touch his face as he winces in fear.

Elina: Oh, now now. Is that any way to greet the one who took you in when your parents passed away?

She steps back quickly as Dorvos angrily leaps at her, the chain Gregory holds keeping him just out of reach. He is obviously saying something, but no sound escapes.

Elina: I'm hurt, young man. I did not murder them. You can blame my sister for Serene's death, but Satnak was killed when she picked the wrong target.

Dorvos's eyes water as he calms and retreats. He hangs his head, again saying something.

Elina: Oh, don't worry. I've enjoyed your singing for all these years. I'm not going to execute you.

He looks up, surprised and as happy as one can be under such circumstances. She again reaches out to rub his cheeks, this time with both hands.

Elina: But it was very foolish to try and influence me that way. It was clever how you hid your spell into my favorite song, but still foolish.

As she says this, she brings her hands down to his neck, resting the palms on each side. The fear in his eyes returns as she continues.

Elina: While I will let you live, I cannot let such things go unpunished. As much as it pains me, I'll have to see to it you can never do such a thing again.

Her eyes darken as a twisted smile reveals fanged teeth. Suddenly, Dorvos lets out a silent scream. Blood drips from each side of his neck. As she pulls her hands away, a shadow spike tears out his voicebox. He falls to his knees as she heals his wound. He would never speak, much less sing, again.

Elina: Take him back to his cell. Perhaps he'll remember his place from now on.

Gregory: At once, my Lady.

-----

In the dungeon, a few cells down from Dorvos's, Sarah is chained to the floor in hybrid form. Her ears perk up and she begins growling as Elina approaches. As she enters, Sarah glowers at her menacingly.

Elina: Wonderful to see you're still in good heath, dear sister. I so hate to keep you down here.

Sarah: How long have I been here? A month? Two? There's no natural light down here.

Elina: I came to ask if you've considered my proposition, but it seems your attitude hasn't changed much.

Sarah: Help you?! How many have you murdered in cold blood?! Our parents, our friends, all dead!

Elina: They did it to themselves. I merely got the ball rolling.

In a rage, Sarah breaks free of her chains and pins Elina to the ground. She growls and bears her fangs as she glares at her sister. Elina shows no trace of fear, and even smiles knowingly as she lies helpless beneath her enraged sibling.

Elina: :smirk: What will you do now? Are you going to kill me like you did Momma?

Sarah stops. She doesn't let go of Elina, but the rage dies almost instantly.

Sarah: :weep: I...I never meant to-

Elina: Yes, keep telling yourself that. I know you can still remember the rush of power. The gush of warm blood. The exhilaration you felt at taking a life. I know the extacy you felt at tearing out her throat.

Sarah: :weep: STOP IT! I didn't want to! I never wanted to kill her! You broke the seals too soon! I couldn't control myself! :weep:

Elina: You didn't have any problems gutting Serene either.

Sarah: :weep: No! It wasn't my fault! :weep:

Elina: :smirk: You want to do it again, don't you? You want to kill me. You want to feel the rush of warm blood again. The thrill of the hunt compels you.

Elina leans her head back further, exposing her throat completely.

Elina: Do it. You want to, right? You have the power to end this madness. I won't stop you. Just take a bite...

After a moment, Sarah returns to humaniod form and gets off. She walks over to the corner, leans against the wall, and begins sobbing profusely as she slides to the ground.

Elina: *humph* Pathetic. Even when you have nothing to lose... I still hope you'll consider my offer. Remember, you don't just have yourself to worry about...

She was right, Sarah was pregnant. Even Tirmek didn't know yet. She hadn't even found out till after her capture.

Elina: And where is that self-centered husband of yours? He's probably written you off for dead.

Sarah: He wouldn't! He's looking for me right now, I know it!

Elina: With that useless cousin of ours? They're too busy running from my forces to even bother themselves with looking for you.

She walks over and brushes the hair from Sarah's face as she speaks tenderly to her.

Elina: We used to do everything together. We can do it again. You know I'll take care of my nieces or nephews. The only question you have to ask is how much you want to be involved as they grow up. I want them to know their mother, but I can't have you running around if you're going to fight me. Come with me. It can be just like old times again!

She could see the conflict in Sarah's eyes, but the concern had been planted. Elina knew her well enough that she would agree in time. So long as no news of Tirmek got back to her, Sarah would not jeapordize her children.

Elina: I will give you more time to think about my proposal. Gregory will be down shortly with your food. I await a positive response, my dear sister...

As she exited the cell, she smiled to herself. Soon, it would all come to fruition. It had been surprisingly easy at first. Breaking the seals was still her greatest coup de grace. When Sarah had killed Lisa, then turned on Serene, it was bonus enough. But then, Satnak went berzerk and tried to kill Sarah out of grief. Terra, of course, defended her. Who would have thought it would be so easy to take out three of the greatest roadblocks to her ascendancy in the first five minutes of her plan? Once Satnak had killed Terra, all Elina had to do was finish her off. Not hard, considering the damage inflicted during the battle.

She had been in rare form then, playing the part of distraught orphan defending her sister from the crew. So many fell in the following days, yet they never suspected her till it was too late. With full command of her power, she gained control of the spirit armies trapped within the mist of the Mournlands. Few from the FF survived the first wave. And that fool Terrek! Oh, how simple it had been to break him. The look on his face as she tore the souls from his body. Priceless! The image of his shocked face crumbling to dust without the souls to maintain him was one she cherished for all time.

Naz'roth was a bit of a challenge, but once she convinced Naur he was threatening to return to enact his revenge, his end had been swift. Having them take each other out was as sweet a reward as any. Volrath...poor, poor uncle Volrath. Once Terra and P/Y/R were dead, he transformed and was forced to return to Xoriat. Only Stewie had remained behind, and was now her head enforcer. Kanatash and Caralot had been away to her home dimension when things fell into place. Ketty had gone home to get help once Satnak fell. With these last real threats away, she had shaken the dimensional alignment with the help of The Shadow, blocking their return. All that were left now to oppose her were her sister (soon to be rectified), Tirmek, and Lilly. Tirmek would be difficult to win over, but once Sarah bowed, he might follow given the right incentives. Lilly had been a thorn in her side for too long. If all went well, Miko would succeed at ending this annoyance once and for all. The rest, as they say, would be history.

-----

The Great Crag: Sora Teraza's meditation hall -

Sora Teraza: Such a thing must not come to pass. My sisters will destroy not only Droaam, but all of Eberron. Something happens here. The stream is too clouded to tell what, but the girl must not walk the path of evil. If my sister's will not listen, then I must act on my own. I only hope I do not inadvertantly cause what may be our doom...
rampant

11-29-06, 10:18 PM		Twenty years from now.

Sarah - (i.h.h. Maladren!)

Maladren - (telepathic response) Be careful this is an emergency line only, no yelling. This is the last time we can use this channel for a while.

Sarah - (telepathy) Tirmek!

Maladren - ...

Sarah - What happened.

Maladren - ... Happening

Sarah - Oh no
--------------------------------------

Tirmek - Ashk Crull Reil Vreck Throm Kresk

I am Tirmek son of Toren

Gresh Krem Barathal

I am Incarnate

Truoludheilm Brekkekul

I demand the right of fallen

Vrokosk Skellen Mork

I AM THE KNIGHTMARE PRINCE NOW AND FOREVERMORE!!!
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-29-06, 10:20 PM		Sora Teraza: Such a thing must not come to pass. My sisters will destroy not only Droaam, but all of Eberron. Something happens here. The stream is too clouded to tell what, but the girl must not walk the path of evil. If my sister's will not listen, then I must act on my own. I only hope I do not inadvertantly cause what may be our doom...
OOC: Want any help? I don't usually get to do anything useful during these conflicts, but it's getting a bit boring to sit back and then wanting to leap to the rescue (when there's comedy I'm distracted). None of my characters may look it, but with a little work I could have some pretty hot heroes.
Charles Phipps

11-29-06, 10:35 PM		Twenty years in the Future

Lilly: You know, I never expected you to fall so far.

*Dozens of corpses surround Tirmek and Lilly*

Michael: I just couldn't get her out of my head....she just....called to me. I had to obey the descendent of Lisa.

Lilly: Tell me where the fortress of Queen Elina is.

Michael: I'll never reveal her location!

Tirmek: You will!

Lilly: Tirmek, turn your back for a second.

Tirmek: Okay.

*Lilly pulls out a pair of brass knuckles and starts beating Michael within an inch of his life*

Michael: *gurgle* IN THE MOURNLANDS! BY THE OLD CAPITAL!

*Tirmek turns around*

Tirmek: How are you keeping your paladin status?

Lilly: Subjectively, if it's not seen, I'm both Paladin and Not Paladin according to Quantum Physics.

Tirmek: :uh-huh:
rampant

11-29-06, 11:36 PM		Sarah - Its over its all over. One way or another this ends tonight.
-----------------------------------

Tirmek - Initiate endgame.
------------------------------------

Maladren - My part here is done. There must be a witness, and a record.
-----------------------------------

Lily - I just wish it had never come to this.
------------------------------------

Heart-wrenching music begins in the background.

Lily Leads a rag-tag army agianst Elina's citadel.

Tirmek soars directly into the courtyard, hands and eyes alight with blazing fear and hatred.

Veteran squirrel infiltrators, several missing eyes, limbs, ears, or tails, tear the skin off of Dorvos's fore-head releasing the bind on his powers.

One last time his wordless crystal song fills the air blending with the background music into an indescribeble tapestry of loss, pain, and the last spark of his unextinguishable hope.

Sarah Rises up to enter the fray one last time.

At the top of the crumbling tower only the music can be heard, the driving rain, the final dialogue, even the clash of the titans is drowned out by the sad threnody.

From the peak of the tower a blast of twisting power rises through to the heavens.

Far Off in the distance A lonely figure holds out a worn and battered scrap of once shiny paper and whispers " I just wish it hadn't turned out like this".

the scene returns to Tirmek, Sarah, Elina, Lily, Miko, and Buttercup rejoining Terra on their trip.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-30-06, 12:49 AM		Twenty years in the future

As he stands above her, Lilly's sword protrudes from Elina's chest. The flow of blood gushes with each beat of her now-impaled black heart. Rain falls in sheets amid the ruins of her fortress, the heavens seeming to weep as her spirit armies float about the remaining heros.

Elina: You...*cough*...were always annoying... Should have killed you first... *gurgle*

Lilly: Before you pass on, I must know. What happened to you? Why all this?

Elina: Why?! *spits blood in his face* Ugh...do I need a reason? It was because I wanted to.

Tirmek: That's not true. But I think I see it now. Your mother reacted strangely when we visited the Hags all those years ago. What did they do to you? This all started after that.

Elina: Eh heh heh heh...like I'd tell you, smartass. *blood dribbles out her mouth* You're so smart, figure it out on your own.

Sarah: :( ...is there anything left of the sister I once loved?

Elina: You're looking at her. Face it.

Sarah: I refuse to believe that.

Sarah kneels next to her sister and places her hand in Elina's. She notices it has gone cold and pale from bloodloss as she holds it to her cheek.

Elina: You really think...it'd be this easy...to take me down? You have defeated my body, not my will. I have spent most of my life building my empire. I will not see it fall in a day!

In a language beyond comprehension, Elina commands her forces one last time. The spirits rush towards her, seeming to merge with her one by one. Lilly is thrown off her as her wounds heal and she rises off the ground. Tirmek and Sarah feel themselves bound by their Demonic heritage, while Lilly is encased in the pure essence of souls as all of them are lifted into the air. Elina's eyes glow green as she smiles evilly at them.

Elina: Before I strike you all down, I shall see you beg for mercy! Eberron is mine! Without me this world dies!

A maelstrom kicks up, taking with it the few squirrel forces that remain. The pieces of her ruined keep fly about, beating Lilly and Tirmek relentlessly. She then turns to her sister, a gleam in her eye.

Elina: Don't worry, dear sister. You will survive. At least, of course, till you bear my new champions. Only the best for my flesh and blood. :evillaugh

Sarah: :weep: No...please...stop... :weep:

Elina: Yes, beg! Beg for forgiveness and I may let you live to see them grow. But first I must finish these tw-urgh!!!

All activity stops. The three heros fall to the ground as Elina holds her head screaming. When she stops and looks up, the glow in her eyes is gone. Somehow, they know she is back.

Sarah: Elina!

Elina: Kill me...

Sarah: What...?

Elina: Please! Before it's too late!

Tirmek: What do you mean? You've returned to your old self!

Elina: :weep: Please...I beg you...I don't want her to come back...

Sarah: But-!

Elina: If she comes back, you all die! DO IT NOW!

Having remained silent the whole time, Lilly finally responds when he sees the desperation in her eyes.

Lilly: ...very well. Goodbye, Elina.

His sword glows as the smite connects. The force of the blow, combined with Elina's willing surpression of her natural defences, opens a large hole in her chest. The group swears they heard enraged screaming, but no words come from Elina's mouth...

Except for two:

"Thank you..."
rampant

11-30-06, 01:21 AM		OORampant - Thanks alot for ruining my big dramatic mystery finish Kaizer.

OOKaizer - Oh not again.

OORampant - *pulls out superscope* Its snesing time!
---------------------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Thank goodness your back. Buttercup keeps trying to stab me, and Lily keeps helping him.

Elina - What about the six times Miko kicked him in the nuts with a spiked metal boot?

Tirmek - ... Why would I complain about that? I've made it abundantly clear I don't like Spoony Jr.
Kaizer_Ryu

11-30-06, 01:27 AM		OOKaizer: *whilst dodging Plazma charges...badly* It's one of many possible futures! *ZAP* OW! You can still do it and it'll make sense! *CRAZAP*
rampant

11-30-06, 01:39 AM		OORampant - I know, but I enjoy using this thing far too much.
*charged shot*

OOKaizer - Hate you so very much!

OORampant - Now back to the present Yah mule!
---------------------------------------------------------

Dorvos - hmm hmm hmmmmmm

Aero - Vacation all I ever wanted

Ivy - Just had to get away
Kaizer_Ryu

11-30-06, 02:07 AM		OOC: Just because, I found this (http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-9132374305956134921&q=robot+chicken&hl=en) Robot Chicken. With all the time travel we do here, it seemed appropriate.

This (http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=5314404649194267296&q=robot+chicken&hl=en) one is just plain funny. No other reason is needed for it.

As with any Robot Chicken, make sure your parents, grandparents, younger siblings, and/or anyone even slightly uptight is not within hearing/viewing distance.

IC:

OOKaizer: :devil: Found my Mirror Shield. :evillaugh *REFLECTALITY*

OORampant: :eek: *ZAP* ...meh. I've had worse. :bored:

OOC: More adventures tomorrow. :zzz: Damn my biological needs! LINK never needs to sleep! :mad:
rampant

11-30-06, 02:30 AM		OORampant - Another reason I chose Captain SNES, no expectations to live up to.
-------------------------------------------------

Dorvos - Hm hm hmmm

Aero and Ivy - We'll kick it uuuuup / together we'll pull through
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-30-06, 08:42 AM		Bunny: Yo.

Dark Elina: Don't you have someone else to be killing? :mad: I'm not in the mood for your dark wit.

Bunny: Hey, I'm not the one who's in the wrong studio.

Dark Elina: What? :confused:

Bunny: We're getting prepped in here for some comedy on the underdecks. You're twenty years too far in the past.

13: On a good note, thanks for sending us Miko. :D

Dark Elina: You're not supposed to like her. She's supposed to make sure my rise to dark power happens.

13: Wait, you're trusting an emo teenager to get something done?

Dark Elina: Isn't that what I just said?

13 and Bunny exchange a look.

Both: :rofl:

Dark Elina: HEY! That's my dark champion you're talking about! My entire future rests on her!

Both: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Silver: Oppposites attract. ;)

Dark Elina: What's that supposed to me—:blink:…………………:eek:
urial angel of death

11-30-06, 08:50 AM		OOC: I will finish with Stewart and Gregory in the twenty years later thing. So please atleast leave them both alive.
Charles Phipps

11-30-06, 09:11 AM		The meeting of the characters

Terra: Well, now we're going to cross over the borders of Breland into Droam.

Lilly: Wait, I sense a great disturbance in the Weave.

Elina: Our magic doesn't come from....

*A dimensional tear appears*

Lilly: *draws his 6ft long sword for his 4ft tall body* I sense an unimaginable dark and evil presence emerging. A terrible force for destruction and chaos that embodies all that I stand against. As a paladin I MUST PROTECT THIS UNIVERSE!

*Miko flies out*

Lilly: Oh....CRAP. *drops sword*

Terra: Oh! She's so adorable!

Tirmek: Hmmmmm.

Lilly: No, it couldn't be a F***ing BALOR could it?

Terra: LILLY! LANGUAGE!

Tirmek: So where do you come from lady?

Miko: I've been sent from the future to destroy Lilly and ensure the corruption of Elina to become the Demon Queen of Khyber that belches forth all the evils of the universe onto the Earth in the Second Demon War. So, could you point me the direction to these losers?

Tirmek, Elina, Sarah, Terra: :uh-huh:

Lilly: Uh.... *points* That way.

Terra: Lilly! Lying is against the paladin's code.

Lilly: 3.5 edition. I can do chaotic acts whenever I went. It's only evil now that troubles my problem so long as I still encourage law.

Miko: :raincloud Oh, I get it you people are the ones I'm supposed to corrupt. Great.

Lilly: I shall smite thee hellspawn!

Miko: *taps foot* Go ahead.

Lilly: *lifts sword and stares at her*

Miko: *crosses her arms* :bored: Anytime now.

Lilly: *stares* *shoulders droop* I can't.

Miko: :f: :sc: :m: What a wuss.

Terra: You said you were sent back in time?

Miko: Yeah, I could be incognito and stuff but I've read
all about you guys and you suck. If Queen Elina could beat you then you can't have been that tough. Besides, Druidism is just a religion for upper class rich girls that want to get back at their parents yet can't appreciate that witchcraft is supposed to be dark and disturbing.

*erects a tent at their campsite that she puts up posters of various Goth bands on the interior of as she gets out her black teddy bear with fangs*

Miko: Now I'm going to go get some shut eye. Wake me up when we're going to eat. I'd like it to be bloody whatever it is.

Terra: I have the oddest urge to take a clerical level or to to get some demon fighting spells....

***

OOCharles: Now all we need is Starfire, Beast Boy, and Cyborg.

Lilly: Whose Robin?

OOCharles: You are.

Lilly: Damnit!
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-30-06, 09:57 AM		OOCharles: Now all we need is Starfire, Beast Boy, and Cyborg.
OOcat: Lady could possibly do Beast Boy………if she were older.

OOCharles: And male.

Silver: Her parents are both female. We can work around that. :D
Lilly: Whose Robin?

OOCharles: You are.

Lilly: Damnit!
Out-of-Touch-OOcat: Wait, as the adopted child of Eberron's Batman, shouldn't Rose be Robin?

Updated-OOcat: There's apparently been more than one Robin.

Bunny: Then we'd better kill Rose, because I don't think he's Nightwing material.

Rose: :eek:

OOcat: Besides, we already had one Robin.

Rose: Who?

OOcat: Slip.

Jarlot (pushing his way into the frame): Slip who?
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-30-06, 10:03 AM		Lilly: Whose Robin?

OOCharles: You are.

Lilly: Damnit!
Squirrel Minstrels: Ooooooooooohhh it's baaaaaaaaaaaaaad luck to be youuuuuuuuuuuuu………
rampant

11-30-06, 10:44 AM		Aero - Very bad luck to be

Ivy - Its a frigging gaurantee

Everyone - Its bad luck to be you!

Liliy - :weep:
--------------------------

Satnak - (whispering to rose: clap or die then be raised as a necrocarnum zombie and clap)

Standing ovation for the new band.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

11-30-06, 10:52 AM		A crewly Beuatiful wouman apers near Ash as he stalks the less used halls of the Forgotten freadom. Shes tall, slender, with the pale skin and violet hair of an inspired. Between her and him 4 mae Inspired, armed and armored flsh into existance.

Sansorianis "Your weak, my raven, alone, all but forgotten. Wont yuo return to me? We can help you, protect you from Pazuzu, we can set you free. wont you come back?"

Ash "A generous offer my laidy, you ask what I cannot aford, in return offer what i do not require. Perhaps if I was homeless you could sell me a park bench? weak you call me? Perhaps I am. Alone you say? Certanly not. Forgotten? never. Not while the survivors of Kirgenberg still weep. Look in to my eyes Sansorianis, I have something to tell you, your bodyguard too." his manner is calm, distracted, his motions sudenly poised as he turns to face her. He stands, silent and still untill there gazes are upon the flaming orbs taht replace his eyes. Then as he speaks, he begins to move.
"Never should you-"
Steping in close with thre long strides he moves past the first pair of bodyguards, nimble tallons stealing there swords from there sheaths in a pair of outward slashes that open the throats of the two behind in fans of red.
"-Take your eyes from-"
Even as they fall he shifts his grip, inverting the blades and driving them back into there owners bodies, blood gouts from there lips as steel finds there hearts.
"-An assasins hands."
He spins acrobaticly, a whirl of feathers black as sin and polished steel, stops only when sansorians feels 2 threads of smothe cold upon her neck, his stolen sword blades...
Chrys

11-30-06, 11:57 AM		D'Ducky: I you granpa gave you that whole Golded fiddle thingy?

Aero: Oh he did; their just no way I'm going down to south for... he can get off is lazy goat ass and do it him self if he wants some hicks soul

D'Ducky: that and the whole Paladin would most likly stop you from steal souls that way.

Aero: suprisingly no I can 'liberate' all the soul I want as long I don't do any thing evil to them.

OoChrys: Aero could be Hawk Girl!

Aero: * Smite Entity* The is no way In the Nine Hell I would be some lame super hero like Hawk girl! Now Give me a Green Latern ring Or ELSE!

OoChrys: Er... Its it a bit un Pal...

Aero what part of OR ELSE did not you understand!
Lord Kale Fangblade

11-30-06, 12:20 PM		OOC: sorry it was such a huge gap between this and the last one, i've had exams all week that and i've been rather caught up in life.
IC:
Way back when Final part

Sa'vor: *to the grey cowled master* and what event would that be?

Grey Cowled master: *sadistic smile* that would be me collecting the debt that you and your wife owe me mortal.

Sa'vor: * fear evident in his eyes* and which debt would this be Kemmler?

Kemmler snarls and sweeps his hand in an arcane gesture. theres a flash of light and Sa'vor falls back. Kemmler walks forwards, his boots stiring up the skeleton dust.
he grabs Sa'vor around the neck and lifts him easily.

Kemmler: the debt Child. would be the one you owe me for your apprenticeship.

Sa'vor: It only applies once im- Ack

Kemmlers grip tightens on Sa'vors throat.

Kemmler: *anger burning in his voice* you thought you could cheat me didnt you? thought that once you died you'd send your soul to Terrek on the forgotten freedom. well you havnt got your friends to help you now Sa'vor. and your going to repay me or im going to tear apart your wife infront of your eyes and consume her soul.

Sa'vor dropped to the floor as Kemmler strode over towards Drusila, Sa'vor pulled himself to his feet, magic craclking between his fingers. Sa'vor made a claw like gesture and summoned up his magic, a bolt of lightning burst from his finger tips. Kemmler turned and with an arcane gesture the bolt of lightning faded.

Kemmler: so you have chosen the third way. Death. * to his minions* kill him.

A storm of energy struck Sa'vor as the Cloaked figures discarged the energy in their staffs. Sa'vor buckled as lightning crackled all over his form and fire burned his flesh, as acid stripped away his skin and bursts of sound shattered his bones. Sa'vor coallapsed to his knees as pain overwhelmed his senses and all became black.
and from the black appeared a figure, he stood over seven feet tall, in black robes and his skeletal hand clutching a Scythe. two pin points of sky blue emitted from his eye sockets.

Sa'vor: it is time?

Death: POSSIBLY

Sa'vor: ... what?

Death: IN MANY ALTERNATIVE UNIVERSES THIS IS THE TIME, IN UNTOLD THOUSANDS YOU DIED LONG BEFORE THIS DAY.

Sa'vor: i see. then what about this reality?

Death: WHAT IS REALITY BUT WHAT WE PERCIVE? WHAT WE SENSE?

Sa'vor: true enough. but what i ask is am i going to die?

Death: NO.

Sa'vor: why?

Death: IT IS NOT YOUR TIME

Sa'vor: no, what i mean is. why are you here? if im not going to die whats the point in you turning up?

Death: *sigh (or should i say SIGH)* I KNOW, ITS RATHER ANNOYING. IT WASTES SO MUCH OF MY TIME. BUT ITS NOW PERCIVED THAT THIS IS A TIME WHERE YOU COULD OF DIED. SO I HAVE TO TURN UP TO EMPHASISE THAT POINT.

Sa'vor: ah. intresting. wait... what happened to the other death?

Death: I BEG YOUR PARDON?

Sa'vor: you know, the one whom looks like Aerith dressed all in black. represents death being good.

Death: OH. HER. SHE'S SEEN AS RATHER A FREE THINKER EVEN BY US MORE FREE THINKING DEATHS. SHE ONLY SERVICES YOUR ORGINAL WORLD.

Sa'vor:.... Free Thinking deaths?

Death: WELL, WE STICK TO THE OLD WAYS. ALL THE OTHER DEATHS HAVE INVESTED IN COMBINE HARVESTERS.

Sa'vor: well. thanks for clearing that up. see you when its time.

Death: INDEED.

Death Vanishes. and pain washes over Sa'vor, all though all he can see is black. he can still hear Morgans screams of pain. anger rises up in Sa'vor, white and hot it strikes somthing deep within him. his very soul and blood feel as if they're ablaze as that well of energy and hatred in the deepest recess of himself overflows. Sa'vor rises, his mind reaching for the blackes of his maigcs. his eyes open and we can see they've become voids of black energy. black flames wreath his form as the tattos and runes on his body glow with a crimson light that can be seen even through his robes,
His robes shift form, becoming the spiked exquisite full plate seen before.

the grey cloaked minions turn their skeletal faces towards him as they open fire with their staffs. Magic wreaths Sa'vor as he turns his attention on them, fire swirls around him and lightning crackles across his armour. Sa'vor smirks and raises a hand, and moves it in a slight slapping motion.
the Minions crumble to dust as Sa'vors magic disintergrates their forms.
Sa'vor turns towards kemmler.

Kemmler raises a hand and sends forth sickly green flames at Sa'vor, Sa'vor swats them aside and unleashes an eldritch blast of black energy that crashes into Kemmler, Kemmler crumples and Green fire dances along his body.

Kemmler: you havnt won Sa'vor. I'll return you know i will. and then your soul is mine.

Sa'vor makes an arcane gesture and Kemmler vanishes in an explosion of light. The dark energy leaves Sa'vor, leaving only pain and fatuigue. Sa'vor collapses and the desire to feel the exctasy of that much magic flowing through him fills him, Darkness decends and Sa'vor falls into unconciousness.
SilvercatMoonpaw

11-30-06, 12:36 PM		Random Audience Member: Hey, wait, I thought Bunny was the death of the original world.

Bunny (sitting right next to him): I'm the "killing" Death. That Death is talking about the "soul collecting" Death.

Random Audience Member: How can anyone tell the difference?

Bunny shoulders his huge gun.

Bunny: I go for the direct approach.
Gladius_Lucix

11-30-06, 12:38 PM		OOCharles: Now all we need is Starfire, Beast Boy, and Cyborg.

Lilly: Whose Robin?

OOCharles: You are.

Lilly: Damnit!

OOGladius: How about Dorvos? If not, I'm sure Liam could make-

OOGladius as he is hit in the back of the head with a roll of duct tape.

Liam: Just no.
Paulon

11-30-06, 12:50 PM		Aw... No Issue 1,000,000 Toy Wonder? :weep: :P
rampant

11-30-06, 01:24 PM		OORampant - Besides Dorvos has three eyes on his face alone, admittedtly the one on his fore-head is closed all the time, and more of a mark than a true eye, but still, And what about the ten eye-marks around his shoulders and upper torso? I mean seriously.
--------------------

Aero - Thank you, thank you, you've been a wonderful audeince.

Ivy - Our tour schedule is available at the booths near the exits.
Paulon

11-30-06, 01:31 PM		It sounds like Terrek included beholder genetic information when he created his daughter. *reads up on Beholder anatomy in LoM and winces at the thought*
rampant

11-30-06, 01:35 PM		OORampant - I was referring more to a robin mask for that. Think about it 13 eyes, even with DC heroe's getting plus 20 to their "woefully lame disguise" skill thats pushing it.
Gladius_Lucix

11-30-06, 01:45 PM		OORampant - I was referring more to a robin mask for that. Think about it 13 eyes, even with DC heroe's getting plus 20 to their "woefully lame disguise" skill thats pushing it.

OOGladius: These multiple hits from rolls of duct tape have knocked a few brain cells loose. I was suggesting Dorvos as Cyborg.
rampant

11-30-06, 01:58 PM		OORampant - Ok that works. Except for the no talking bit.
--------------------------------------------------------------

Aero - Is it just me or is it really anoying when the guy who can't talk sings better than you.

Ivy - True but until he gets past this whole no words thing, you're still lead singer.
Chrys

11-30-06, 02:36 PM		Aero: What I thought you where? My muscial talent lies in drums and there ilk... Sigh I rem

ooChrys: NO! I'm not ready for any flash backs yet... plus there are to many time traveling arc right now any way. OH heres your ring

Aero Why is it purple?

ooChrys because I don't like the color green or yellow. Look at it this way no color can stop your ring... *Mummble

Aero WHAT WAS THAT?

OoChrysno color... but your ring will not work on any thing that is Spoony. But any way Aero uses Drums and other things she can beat on...

Aero: Like the souls of the damn...

OoChrys Really she Is Lawful Good!
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

11-30-06, 06:01 PM		Sansorians stands, her thorat between the two shining blades Ash holds there.
"Dear, foolish raven, and you an elocater once upon a time. You've learned nothing. Enjoy the swords, when next we meet again you'll need them." disapers.

Chanse "Bird Brain! what have I told you? when a bad guy starts mologung you coup de-" his words are cut off when ash punshes him in such manner Silver wont have a use for him. "what the hell did you do that for?"

Ash "'when a bad guy starts mologung you coup de grace them' wasn't that what you were going to say? So I sued an unarmed strike to try it on you before you talked me to death... Your right, it is better. See you."
rampant

11-30-06, 06:17 PM		Dorvos - Buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Lady - Bzzzzzzzzzzzzt

Dorvos - bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzlzlzlzlzlzlzlzlzlzl

Lady - bzzzlzlzlzlzlzlzlzlzlz

Chalky - This is what I get for telling them to buzz off :doh:
Kaizer_Ryu

11-30-06, 09:42 PM		Tirmek: Ok, I take back what I said the last twelve times. THIS place is the weirdest yet.

The group stands amid a gnoll mercenary camp. Being the Neutral power group in the region, their living style reflects such. The place is gray. Not drab, gloomy, or any other metaphor associated with the word gray. It is gray in a very literal sense. The buildings, clothing, even the earth and sky around the camp are gray.

Terra: I warned you. The Gnolls have gone to great lengths to assure that, should Droaam decend into anarchy, they will not be percieved as an enemy by anyone.

Miko: This color scheme is so totally lame. Black is the way to go.

Elina: What is up with your obsession with black, creepy, and dark things?

Miko: It's your fault. Well, it will be, anyway.

Elina: :confused:

Miko: Nevermind. You still suck, no matter when you are.

Elina: :uh-huh:

Gnoll Guard: Hello, travelers. May your visit be found adequate.

Sarah: Uh...thanks...

Terra: Like I said, they're obsessed with Neutrality to the point of absurdity.

Gnoll Merchant: Satisfactory day to you, human male. Might you consider purchasing this passable saddle for your steed? My prices are somewhat tolerable.

Lilly: No wonder Droaam has no economy...
urial angel of death

11-30-06, 09:59 PM		twenty years in the future.

Stewie raced to the top of the tower. He had to activate his mistress's eldritch device before the heroes got to it.
He rached the top and frantically began pressing buttons and pulling levers, (but we're still on our home planet) but just as he was going to press the big ominous red button Stewie was knocked over by three massive icicles tearing through his side. Barely able to lift his head Stewie looked in the direction that the icicles came from. He saw a man in purple robes, folding a set of mechanical wings into his back.

Stewie: Well, well, well you decided to come back, *coughs up blood* but why are you trying to stop me? I thought you were my evil sibling.

Man: You're helping the one who killed Mother and made Father the pathetic thing he is today. He nolonger feels enjoyment in anything but destruction. He doesn't live. Our father merely exists. I have come to avenge him.

Stewie: Vladamire do you really think you can kill me?

Vladamire: I'm fairly certain I already did.

Stewie: You forget that this weak mortal shell is not my true form.

Stewie's body goes limp and begins shaking violently. A torrent of blood flows from his mouth and is followed by an enormous serpantine creature. It is far to large to have fit inside him. Finally free of his fleshy prison Stewie hovered over the dhredded remains of his old body. Vladmire recoiled from the stare of his brother's three bulbous green eyes.

Stewie: Prepare to die!

Out of his extra-dimensional pocket Vladamire pulls his impossibly long katana, and uses it to block his brother's masticating* jaws. With Vladamire's sword pinned out of the way his side remained wide open for Stewie's swinging tail. He sends Vladamire flying into the tower's stone guard-rail.

Stewie: Any last words dearest brother?

Vladamire: *collapses after a strained attempt to sit-up* Behind you.

Stewie: Do you really expect me to fall for th-

A beam of dark energy rips into the back of Stewie's head and sends him to the ground. Its soure hovered several feet overhead. It was Myrr, another of Volrath and P/Y/R's children. He wore a black robe and steepled hat that cast a shadow that obscures his entire face save for his glowing yellow eyes and torquise hair.

Stewie: So another of father's spawn has come for revenge.

Myrr: After what you have done, you have not the right to call him father. *scythe materializes in his hands* Death is the only punishment fit for your crimes.
Charles Phipps

11-30-06, 10:43 PM		Sarah: Listen, I don't know who the Hell you are...

Miko: I'm Miko. I'm the daughter of Michael and Sabriel.

Sarah: *stare*

Miko: What?

Sarah: Are you adopted? Because Michael is all greasy ugly and you're....

Miko: Whatever.

Sarah: In any case, you won't corrupt my sister to EVIL!

Miko: Which just goes to show you're a bigot.

Sarah: Eh?

Miko: I bet you're against the Daelkyr too!

Sarah: Well yes...

Miko: Despite being of mixed races yourself, you degrade your fiendish side because you're secretly ashamed of it. It's okay to be all liberal and stuff but when someone wants to marry a Fiend, it's ALLlllll downhill.

Sarah: No its not LIKE that!

Miko: Go ahead, keep oppressing my cultural heritage you damn Wasp.

Sarah: :twitch:

Elina: Well I'm not adverse to my destiny.

Sarah: What?

Elina: I'm a Witch and it's my goal to be as powerful as I can be Sarah. Mom has taught me that it's important to be open minded about differing shades and shapes of belief. What is evil to many species is good to me. In the end, what matters is the person who wields the strongest control over magic is the one whom shapes reality for better or worse.

Sarah: That's horrible.

Elina: It's the truth. It's my hope to apprentice myself to one of the Hags of Sora Kell or Mordain in hopes of continuing my magical education. Why should I hold back on becoming more powerful because of what others tell me is wrong? In the end, isn't what does the world the most good what is actually good? Besides, something wrong can turn out to be very right after time. Mom's druidism points that death is a natural cycle of life.

Miko: Zzzzzzzzzzzz.

Elina: HEY!

Miko: Oh sorry, I couldn't stay awake with your yammering about morality.

Elina: FIREBALL!

Miko: Spell Resistance.

*Sarah starts to throttle Miko*

Terra: SARAH!

Sarah: Sorry mom.

Miko: Got back from boiling your ginsing and making up stories about how you were OHhhhhhh so persecuted in the past?

Terra: You've got to strangle like this.

*Terra starts to shake Miko by the throat Homer Simpson style*

Lilly: Hey, the nightmares are here to bring us to the Castle of the Hags. I....DAMNIT PEOPLE!

*Lilly pulled on Miko's leg for a bit to pry her loose from Sarah's grip*

Lilly: Now, I personally think she's a horrific nightmarish abberation against the gods who needs to be destroyed yet if we're going to stop Elina from becoming evil....

Elina: Becoming is a state of perception.

Lilly: We need her. So STOP IT. UGH! You people are so damn hypocritical and phony sometimes!

Miko: *leans up and kisses Lilly on the lips* Thanks.

*Miko walks away*

Lilly: *utter look of horror on his face* :uh-huh:

Miko: :devil:
rampant

11-30-06, 11:47 PM		Tirmek - Hello Elina attends the Open Eye Acedemy with Me and her sister. Give her a couple years and she'll be able to blast the whole coven with one Call Lightning Bladestorm.

Elina - hmmmmm...

Tirmek - (telepathy) Two bits we could take em now if we really needed to.

Elina - Open Eye wins!
------------------------------------

Serene - Bed now!

Satnak - Dorvos-

Serene - Lisa is watching him silly girl. Now come.

Satnak - Yes love :blush:
Kaizer_Ryu

11-30-06, 11:50 PM		On their way to the Great Crag:

Sarah: I don't care what you think, little miss B*tch. I'm not a bigot.

Miko: :smirk: Oh really?

Sarah: Hel-LO-o?! Do the words Werewolf mean anything to you? Does the fact that I hang out with a very obviously Half-Rakshasa even register in that empty head of yours?

Miko: If that's what you want to believe, then fine. You're not a bigot. You're just prejudiced against evil.

Sarah: Or maybe I'd rather my sister be free to make her own choices, instead of some two-bit floosy come along and try to turn her into something she's not.

Miko: Seems she's doing that just fine. *walks away*

Tirmek: There is more going on here than meets the eye. You see it as much as I do. Your sister is not herself.

Sarah: I know. She refuses to talk to me about it. I'm very worried about this...

-----

In some ways, the Great Crag had changed quite a lot since Terra had last visited, but in most...not so much. There were far more permanent structures, but the crude Trollish architecture mixed with Dhakanni ruins and interspersed camps of squatters still remained. The arena still rang out with the sounds of combat, and the Trolls and Gnolls still maintained order. One thing that caught Terra's eye, however, was the expansion of the Temple dedicated to the Shadow. The sight was enough to make her blood boil, but she ignored it.

The group was led to the Court of Sora Kell, cut into the very rock of the mountain. They followed their escort to a large audience hall, at the end of which were three large and opulent chairs. Sora Katra sat in the center, Sora Maenya on the left, and the right was empty. Sora Katra stood and walked towards Terra, smiling with a combination of excitement and haughtyness. The voice that eminated from her seemed oddly out of place for a green hag. Merely hearing her silken tones almost forced you to be at ease.

Katra: Welcome back, young one. You were taking so long, I was beginning to wonder if you didn't want to see us.

Terra: I wanted to give them a tour of the country you rule first. Give them something to go off of.

Sora Maenya spoke with much less tact.

Maenya: Seems you picked up another sprat along the way, girl.

Miko: :mad:

Katra: Please, sister. No need to be rude. It's rare we get visitors just for fun.

Terra: Where is Teraza?

Katra: A vision came to her not long ago and she had to excuse herself. She sends her apologies, and said she will join us later. Your guides will show you to your rooms. By the time you get settled, the feast will be ready.

Lilly: You're not going to feed us people, are you?

Katra: Oh, no, of course not, child. Soylent Green is only for army rations. Soylent Grey is reserved for Maenya's troll units, so it's off the menu as well.

At this time, a ragged looking (well, more so than normal) Orc runs by, pursued by several troll and gnoll guards. As they trap him in a corner, he falls from his injuries, but manages to say one more thing.

Orc: Soylent Grey is made from Orcs! IT'S ORCS!!!!!! *begins sobbing as they carry him away*

Lilly: :uh-huh:

Sarah: That was less than heartening...

OOC: I'll do the feast and whatnot in a bit. If you want to have them explore the court beforehand, feel free. Just don't do anything storyline wise with the Hags, especially Teraza.
rampant

12-01-06, 12:28 AM		Miko - (i.h.h. ok Tirmek is pretty much out of my league at this point, but I have an equalizer)

Tirmek is sipping down a glass of water.

Miko flicks a cube of sugar into his glass while he's showing Sarah a new hammer move. ( as you can imagine Lily is less than pleased with that part )

Tirmek - *sip*

Tirmek's eyes take on a crazed sheen. Looking down into the arena he sees a scarred hobgoblin stalking the ring calling down challengers.

Tirmek - *yoink*

Sarah - I got it! did you see the ground crack!? Hey where'd he go?

Lily - Ten gold on Tirmek bookie.

Elina - I thought you hated him?

Lily - This way in the unfortunate event of his victory I get consolation prize.

Elina - Ah

Miko - :evillaugh:

Sarah - 20 gold on Tirmek

Bookie goblin - wow this kid somesort of local hero?

Kids - Hahahahaha Tirmek hero? not in a million years!

Elina - I have seen him survive reapeted hydra attacks though.

Sarah - And all the times Lily's unicorn gored him.

Elina - Or that time he wasted himself trying to save you from that crazy guy with izzy.

Sarah - That was a low blow.
--------------------------------------------------------------

After about fifteen minutes

Elina - Should we end this farce?

Miko - Dammit! I thought the trolls had him for sure!

Lily - That trick with the noses really works, who knew?

Sarah - Not yet I think the bookie is about to cry.

Bookie - I'm ruined *sniff*
------------------------------------------

in the center of the arena amongst a rapidly growing pile of unconcious monsters

Tirmek - I *hic* pown all you bizzznatchess :pint:
luna18moon

12-01-06, 12:35 AM		OOC: The twenty years in the future story is depressing. The scary part is that it all makes sense *shiver*.
IC: Something glides high in the air over the Forgotten Freedom. Suddenly, a small explosion sends it careening down towards the deck.
Female voice: :( There goes another perfectly good glider. Going down!
The glider crashes into the deck. A half-elf and a warforged climb out.
Half-elf: There has got to be a way to get these to last longer than half the intended first flight. Where did we crash this time, Salea?
Salea: An airship, most likely stolen, crewed by pretty much anything you care to name.
A kitten climbs out of seemingly nowhere and sits himself down Salea's shoulder.
Half-elf: :blink: It has "He's not here" painted on the side, doesn't it?
Salea::confused: How did you know?
Half-elf: It could be bad or good: we made it to the Forgotten Freedom, but we crashlanded.
Salea: :mymy: Great. The worst case scenario is the Spoony Captain kills us and feeds us to the souleater, and the best case scenario is most probably we get killed by a child.
Mittens wanders by.
Half-elf::OMG! A KITTEN! RUN!
The kitten jumps off Salea's shoulder before he gets carried off.
Kitten: Hello. Sorry about my master and Shamil. They seem to be deathly afraid of you for reasons I can't begin to guess. I'm Nashvir, Salea's familiar.
Mittens: The name's Mittens. I'm part green dragon, part tibbit, and I can see the spirits swirling around your master. Why are you playing with souls?
Nashvir: That's part of their ambition to be able to create true life. Shamil makes constructs well enough, but Salea's having a bit of trouble. She can make humanoids well enough, but her spells are lacking when it comes to anything else. They're currently experimenting with butterflies and working their way up.
Mittens: *relaxes* Good. Most of the people I see those around are Terrek, who eats souls, and people with necrocarnum.
Nashvir: No wonder you were so hostile. You ought to ask people's story first and threaten acidic doom later.
*awkward silence*
Mittens: Do you want to take a tour? I'll show you around and introduce you to the crewmembers, or at least the ones who aren't away.
Nashvir: I'd love to.
They walk off together. Rip, Tear, and Shred come out from behind the mast.
Shred: I don't like him.
Rip: Is that because
Tear: he's an idiot
Rip: or because
Tear: Mittens is our sister?
Shred::ahem: Are you with me or not?
Rip: We're with you
Tear: every step of the way.:smirk:
Shred::smirk: His life is hell, 'cause we've found the chili and mixed in more acid.
Rip: Please use
Tear: future tense.
Shred: Sorry, the future's just so clear...:evillaugh

Shamil
Female Half-elf 7 Artificer/1 Wizard/5 Effigy Master
Shamil loves to build constructs, and aspires to create real life from her creations. She has heard a lot about the Forgotten Freedom (mostly unexaggerated). She loves experimenting with her constructs, often 'crossbreeding' them.

Salea
Female Personality Warforged Wizard 17
She is fascinated by life in general. She is kind and gentle (traits that got her sent to the trash heap). Shamil found her and they've been working together ever since.

Nashvir
Male Kitten (Effectively Sorcerer 20)
Salea's familiar. He likes to find out new things and and particularly likes tinkering with old things to make them completely new (not so hard, as he's figured out how to channel some of Salea's power (or rather, tinker with Salea's power so that not only can he use it, he's improved it).
rampant

12-01-06, 01:02 AM		OORampant - yay! Luna's not dead, Now I don't have to kill someone in retribution... Damn I don't get kill anyone :ahem:

Bunny - party pooper

OOluna - What did I do?:(
---------------------------------------

Lily - I'm torn on one hand He's beating them all, on the other hand I'm rich.

Sarah - I wanna know what set him off.

Elina - OOh I feel sorry for that Hill giant!

Lily - Thats what they get for being too tall to hit above the belt.

Miko - WHY WON'T HE DIE ALREADY!?

Lily - To spite me.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-01-06, 03:35 AM		Tirmek sits at the table holding an icepack to his temple. The feast before them is oddly...normal considering they're in the heart of a nation of monsters. They don't really bat an eye at the parts of the food that are still moving. When you've eaten on the Forgotten Freedom, not much fazes you.

Katra: I do hope you're enjoying your meal. Though I wish you'd stop being so suspicious, young man.

Lilly: *casts Detect Poison for the third time* Can't be too careful. I'm the only one not immune to poison here.

Maenya: *stuffing her face* Kids got a point.

Katra: True, but it destroys the mood when the food keeps glowing different colors. Where is Teraza? She's taking an awfully long time. She'll miss out...

As everyone finishes, Terra sets her glass down and stares at Katra for a moment. They lock eyes, and one can almost sense a sudden tension in the room.

Katra: You've got something on your mind, I see.

Terra: Several things, actually. Normally they wouldn't concern me, but...

Maenya: Not like you to beat around the bush. Out with it.

Terra: All right then. Why now? I don't hear from you for thirty some years, and out of the blue you invite me for a feast. You also request the company of my daughters, but not my wife.

Katra: Why, Terra, is that suspicion in your voice? I'm hurt. What reason would you have to think us up to no good?

Terra: My reasons are my own.

Maenya: Oh, fiesty. At least that hasn't changed.

Katra: I do apologise for not contacting you sooner. I thought I'd make it up to you with a celebration. As for your wife, we discussed it, and felt that the presence of a Paladin of the Silver Flame, especially one so strong, would cause an uproar. Not everyone here would be willing to accept such an event.

Terra: *shrugs* Fair enough. Next question. My memory seems a bit hazy during my time here. I remember very few events clearly, and only with some difficulty. What has caused this?

Katra: Sorry, dear. I'm afraid I don't know.

Terra: Last one for now. Elina has been acting strangely ever since we entered Droaam.

Elina: I have not!

Sarah, Tirmek, & Lilly: :uh-huh:

Terra: Hush. She is saying things neither I nor my wife would ever expect to hear from her. We raised her better, and she knows better. She has spouted nonsense about means-ends morality that I find most disturbing. Now...I must know: *pause* What are you whispering to her?

Maenya looked at Katra for a signal to attack. That was a direct accusation, and one that under other circumstances would have meant death for the one who uttered it. In this case, however, Katra merely looked deeply wounded. She held that face for so long, even Terra wondered if she had been mistaken.

Katra: ...I see you've grown less trustful of us in your absence. You once trusted me with your heart and mind, but now...

Terra: And that is why I must know the answers to my questions. Too much doesn't make sense.

Katra stands up and signals for the rest of them to do the same.

Katra: Very well. To demonstrate my sincerity, I will let you use the hags eye as well as any other devices you may wish for to search for your answers. Follow me.

Hesitantly, the group follows the two hags through the corridors of the court. Passing through one of the many hallways, Lilly hears a voice in his mind.

???: The fragments must not be separated... The divine one must not touch the water...

Lilly: The hell?

Sarah: Hey, Lilly, hurry up! You'll be left behind.

Tirmek: Would that be so bad?

Lilly: :mad:

Miko: What's your deal?

Elina: *looking pale* Ugh...I think I ate too much...

Finally reaching their destination, Katra and Maenya enter first. As the rest follow, they see a large device set into the wall. In the center is a floating orb of water about 6 feet in diameter.

Terra: I've never seen this before...

Katra: We discovered this a few years ago amidst the ruins of the Dhakanni within this mountain. It has proven to be most useful.

Terra walks up to it, looking over the device. She can't make heads or tails of it, but the orb facinates her.

Terra: *touches the water* What does it do?

Katra: *presses a button* This.

In the blink of an eye, three things happen. First, Elina collapses. Terra turns her head to see, but finds herself suddenly and violently dragged into the water. Third, Maenya attacks. Unable to react in time, both Sarah and Tirmek are knocked through a wall. Lilly pulls out his sword and calls Buttercup. As he keeps Maenya busy, Buttercup grabs Elina and whisks her out the door.

Lilly: Dammit, Miko! What are you just standing there for?!

Miko: I'm wondering who's side to take.

Katra: *INFLUENCE REACTION*

Miko: Well, that settles it. Screw you, B*tch.

Miko pulls out her sword and teams up against Maenya. They throw her into the wall, then take off out the door.

Lilly: Dammit, dammit, DAMMIT! I KNEW something was up!

Miko: Brilliant deduction, genious. Any other infinite wisdom you'd like to bestow upon me?

Lilly: The divine one must not touch the water...it must have meant Auntie Terra. But...who are the fragments? Wait, where's Sarah and Tirmek?!

Miko: Hell if I know.

Lilly: We have to go back for them!

Miko: We? Yeah right. I only helped you because that b*tch tried to tell me what to do. You want to get yourself killed, be my gue-HEY!

Lilly has already turned around and taken off.

-----

Katra: Not quite as planned, but we got the biggest fish on the first try. Find the rest of them quickly.

Maenya: You don't have to tell me twice. Do they all have to be alive?

Katra: Only the fragments. The rest are fair game.

Maenya: Excellent.

As Maenya began the hunt, Katra looked into the pool of water. Terra beat against the surface in vain. She quickly found she was unable to access any of her vast power within the sphere, and as time passed, she even found it difficult to move at all.

Katra: You betrayed us, my former pupil. You would be nothing without us! But look at you now. Because of your defiance, you have brought to us a source of unimaginable power! I only hope your daughters prove to be more loyal than you.

Teraza: *entering* Sister! Stop this madness!

Katra: There you are, Teraza. You're just in time. The show is about to begin.

Teraza: No, you musnt! You'll destroy us all!

Ignoring her, Katra flipped a switch on the Eldrich Machine. Streams of energy poured from Terra as the ground trembled. She could be seen screaming in the water as the device dug deeper into her power reserves.

Teraza: I beg of you to stop this!

Katra: This is our greatest triumph! We will never get this opportunity again, sister. Silence your protests and help Maenya find the children!

Teraza lowered her head and walked out. Katra could be heard gloating in the background as she shook her head.

Teraza: This will be the end of us. Can't you see that, sister?

OOC: Ok, that's it for tonight. Few things to keep in mind if you want to contribute: Sarah and Tirmek are not to find Buttercup and Elina. Lilly and/or Miko can find either group, it doesn't matter. Elina is not to wake up, either. As you've probably figured out, Teraza is going to be their "insider" help. She won't directly oppose her sisters, but will aid the kids when they need it (instant plot device!). Terra is not to be freed, nor are any of the Hags to be killed. Maimed? Knock yourselves out. Don't bring in the rest of the crew. I'll be posting why tomorrow (hopefully in the morning). You've got plenty of Trolls, Gnolls, and other horrors to work with. Make Bunny happy!
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-01-06, 08:17 AM		Terra: Like I said, they're obsessed with Neutrality to the point of absurdity.
13: Yes, and I made them in my image to boot. :devil:
Miko: I'm Miko. I'm the daughter of Michael and Sabriel.
Silver: You do know that means you're part nymph.

Miko: Um……no I'm not. :shifty:

Silver: Oh, you are.

Miko: Listen, you, I am not part prissy-pretty fairy girl. :mad:

Silver: I have the DNA to prove it. :D

Miko: :eek: It's all lies! LIES!
Miko: *leans up and kisses Lilly on the lips* Thanks.

*Miko walks away*

Lilly: *utter look of horror on his face* :uh-huh:

Miko: :devil:
Silver: Awww, budding romance.

Miko: Will you leave me alone?! :headexplo
Miko - WHY WON'T HE DIE ALREADY!?
Bunny: Because it mans infinitely more dead people if he lives. Yes, I know it doesn't sound like me. :bored:
Katra: Why, Terra, is that suspicion in your voice? I'm hurt. What reason would you have to think us up to no good?
13: It's listed in the campaign setting: "The hags are up to no good."
Miko: Well, that settles it. Screw you, B*tch.
OOcat: I like her. :D
Charles Phipps

12-01-06, 09:16 AM		Wait, if she's the daughter of Michael then that means...

Aerith: MY GRANDDAUGHTER!

Miko: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
rampant

12-01-06, 10:28 AM		Tirmek - Ok Priorities

Sarah - Make sue Elina is safe, free mom.

Tirmek - Any luck with calling for aid?

Sarah - Being jammed.

Tirmek - Dammit :mad:

Sarah - *ears perk up*

Sarah and Tirmek - *evil grin*

Maenya - Very good you caught me, very percepti-

Tirmek - *holding up his warhammer and a warmace, while his blue bracers surge with energy* Sarah blunt weapons!

Sarah - Normally I save this for pervs, but this is an emergency.

Meanya - I think I might need re-inforcements:eek:
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-01-06, 10:30 AM		Wait, if she's the daughter of Michael then that means...

Aerith: MY GRANDDAUGHTER!

Miko: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Silver: Oh, yeah, I keep forgetting about that. :embarrass

Bunny: I just realized something very twisted about this family:…

Silver: Oh yeah. :D

Bunny: …Michael is Aerith's son, Miko's parents are Michael and Saberiel, Saberiel had a kid with Aerith…………meaning that I don't want to think about this any more. :bored: I'm just going to go kill something now.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-01-06, 10:58 AM		Sarah: What the hell just happened?

Tirmek: Pay attention! *smashes Maenya in the head*

Sarah: Sorry...I feel...wierd. It's like my soul is burning...

Tirmek: Can you still fight?

Sarah: Yeah.

Tirmek: Good. She's too much for me alone.

Maenya: RrrrraaaaAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!

Tirmek: Oh, crap, she's raging!

Sarah: GrrrrrrrAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Tirmek: (i.h.h.) I wonder who's scarier...

-----

Buttercup: (You're heavier than you look.)

Elina: ...don't wanna...

Buttercup: (Lilly told me to get her to safety, but where is safe in this place? I feel dark energy stalking this girl.)

Elina: ...why should I...?

Buttercup: (She needs help. Where the hell is everyone?)

Elina: ...that's not true...

-----

Miko: Boring... Meh. Waiting sucks. Everything sucks. Maybe if I go find the prissy Paladin I can at least see something interesting. Like his bloody death. Or maybe he'll smite something with a lot of blood. I've always wanted to see what would happen if a Troll exploded...

-----

Lilly bursts back into the room housing the Eldrich Machine. Katra still stands there, looking rather pleased with herself as she watches Terra. The tortured look on Terra's face disturbes him as the device continues to siphon power.

Lilly: Katra! Release her!

Katra: *not even looking* Quiet boy. If you had any idea the power you were dealing with, you would not request such a silly thing.

Lilly: *pulls out his sword* I said release her, fiend!

Katra: You want to fight me? What will happen to your beloved Aunt should I fall? Who will release her?

Lilly: If I don't, you sure as heck won't.

Katra: *chuckles* That's true. However, would you like to know why we're doing this? Why we went to all the trouble of dragging them here and putting on that rediculous farce?

Lilly: :bored: Not really.

Katra: Well, you're going to hear it anyway!

A bolt of pure energy shoots from her hand, knocking Lilly down. She positivelty oozes power as the machine feeds her Terra's life force.

Katra: You travel with beings you do not understand. You live with them, yet you do not know them. You're own beloved aunt is a creature beyond your comprehension.

Lilly: *cough* Enough with the monologue already...

Katra: I can't help it. I'm a Bard. I love to talk. :P

She steps back into a dramatic pose. Terra is directly behind Katra's outstreched hand in Lilly's line of vision.

Katra: I give to you...none other than Eberron's newest Goddess.

It takes a few moments for this to register, and even then, Lilly is confused.

Lilly: Wait...what?

Katra: Oh, yes. So new, in fact, she has yet to be given a name by her worshippers. Curiously enough, she has yet to gain any real worshippers. Doesn't seem to want them, either.

Lilly: What nonsense are you spouting? How is that possible?

Katra: Her role in the Prophesy was to become the Shadow's champion. With the help of Khyber's and the Fury's champion, they were to bring about a second Demon War and plunge this world into eternal darkness. But she escaped her prison the only way she could. By becoming a goddess herself. She fused with one of the primal forces of the world and became it's keeper.

Lilly: Shadow...

Katra: Yes! The most wonderful force that shapes our world. With it, she can change the very nature of all she touches. It is a ruler's dream! I will have it for myself!

Lilly: And her daughters?

Katra: Ah, yes. From the loins of this world's newest goddess spring this world's new Native Outsiders: The Suferot. In the language of the gods, it means "fragments of the infinite".* A most curious race to say the least.

Now it finally made sense. The fragments the voice spoke of were Sarah and Elina, and the divine one was Terra. Terra had already touched the water, but he could still reunite the girls. He only hoped it wasn't too late already. He'd need their help to face Katra with her newfound strength.

Lilly: *stands and brushes himself off* Well...thank you. You've been very helpful. I think I'll just...be going now. *yoink*

The doorway is suddenly blocked by a Wall of Force.

Katra: I think not, boy. You should know that after a monologue, the villain always kills her listener.

Lilly: But if it's the hero, there's always a Plot Device to save him.

Katra: Too bad you're not the hero. I'll enjoy stripping the flesh from your bo-gah!!

Lilly: Right on time.

The ground shakes violently as the flow of energy from Terra shifts. The machine has finally dug through the power her mortal form possessed and reached the core. The lightning like flow changes to more of an oozing black. Katra cries out from both the pain of the overload and the extacy of the power she is channelling.

Lilly: Though I'm not sure if this is any better...

Katra: Yes! The power! It's just as I imagined it! Time for you to die, boy!

-----

Sarah falls to her knees in agony as she and Tirmek takes Maenya head on.

Sarah: Augh! It...burns!

Tirmek: Not now! *CRACK* Gah! :mad: Don't toy with me!

-----

Elina wimpers, but does not wake up.

Buttercup: (Not good, not good!)

A Flight of Harpies are in hot pursuit.

-----

Katra raises her hand, and a ball of shadow energy begins to form. Unfortunately for her, there is a second Plot Device. The rumbling grows even more violent, and both she and Lilly finds it near impossible to stand. The flow of power from Terra turns from a trickle into a stream. Unable to control it, Katra loses control of the energy in an explosion of magical power gone wrong.

-----

Outside the court, the residents of the Great Crag are in a state of panic. Their mood is not helped when a wall of darkness rises up to engulf the city. From the outside, the Crag appears to be encased within a large, black dome. Only the Everbright Lanterns and the campfires offer any light. Until, of course, the fires start.

-----

Katra lays on the floor, writhing in complete agony. The energy she channeled has overloaded her system, but not left her. Lilly is already gone, searching desperately for Sarah as he calls to Buttercup. His first priority is getting the girls back together. The warning had been sincere, if not vague, so he had to do everything he could to make sure he followed it's second request. Now, if the damn ground would just stop shaking, he could get somewhere. He took solace only in the fact that the shaking was disrupting Maenya's forces as well...

*OOC: This is actually a word and it's meaning in Kaballic tradition. I think it's where Square got Sephiroth's name. I thought it was cool and had to use it. At least I learned something in World Religions... :D

More this evening. I'm hoping this is coming off as exciting to you as it is to me. I wonder what Miko is going to do...

Michael and Saberiel, Aerith and Saberiel...does anyone else hear banjos? ;)
rampant

12-01-06, 12:02 PM		OORampant - *holding a smoking superscope* Not anymore I don't.

Bunny - Wheeeeeeee
--------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Grrrr why do you want the girls? Why can't you just leave us alone?

Tirmek Leaps over Sarah and brings bothe hammers down on The hag's back in a perfect soaring eagle strike.

Meanya - We're gonna bring forth the next age of fiends boy, (they're too strong to take together maybe if i pull some of the old razzle dazzle) wanna help? You're the most powerful member of a tough breed those Rakshasa.

Tirmek - Why does everyone think I want to rule people?!

Sarah - To be honest your ancestry does tend to indicate a predilection for dominance and your overall tendency to take charge of the situation and obvious desire for power doesn't exactly dissuade anyone.

Meanya - Yes you want power, join us and stand by her side as the world becomes ours.

Tirmek and Sarah - SHUT UP THE PC'S ARE TALKING!!
Lord Kale Fangblade

12-01-06, 12:38 PM		twenty years in the future.
( this is a few weeks before the final battle)

Elina strides down the stairs and halts at a statue, she smiles and speaks the command word. theres slight sound of gears as the statue moves aside to reveal passageway. she strides down it and the statue seals behind her.
soon she appears before a heavily enscorlled ornate door, she paces a key in its lock and the door slides open.

before her is a exquisite bed room, Lab and library. its kept neat and tidy with only a small amount of dust. its sole inhabitant is sat at a table, Sithis, he's shirtless. revealing his lithe frame, his chest is heavily scarred and theres a patch of flayed skin at his right shoulder and two almost invisible white scars are upon his neck. upon his left shoulderblade is a dragon mark and flowing down his left arm is a series of runes. above his right eye brow is a similar rune to Sa'vors, though slight varations are apparent.

His white hair is short and well kept, his pupils rather than the violet before hand have become crimson. he turns to look at Elina.

Elina: ah, Sithis. i trust you've enjoyed your stay here?

Sithis: *rising* yes, its rather generous of you to give me this place.

Elina: *sits down on a offered chair* yes, it is rather generous isnt it.

She knew she should of got rid of him many years ago, he was far too dangerous to her attempts at power. but... she smiled, he had his uses. one was his evident skill at Mage smithing and magic in general.
even though he wasnt as subservient as she would like... there was somthing liberating about talking to someone whom had some personal intelligence for once.

Sithis: *turns his chair to face her* are you here to pick up those new curse formuleas i've made you? im rather amazed with how easy it was to make them myself, i dont understand how your spell casters had trouble with them.

Elina smiled, that was the thing, he just seemed far to innocent. he was hideing somthing, and thats what was intresting. some one whom actualy had the nerve to hide things.

Elina: *suprised* you've completed them already? i only gave them to you yesterday

Sithis: i thought they'd be rather challgeging myself, but it appears not.
* hands her the scrolls* is there anything else you'd like to enquire about?

Elina: *making her face passive* yes, i would like to enquire as to how your shoulders healing.

Sithis: rather well, seeing as you did flay my other dragon mark from me. though it still pains me greatly.

Elina: *smile* shame, i'll send down some potions to help dull the pain. finaly, have you had any success translating that final piece of prophecy?

Sithis: *turning to his desk, Sighs frustratedly* no, not as yet. the prophecy is.... difficult. it twists and turns. especialy this part, im sorry i cant be of more use- *goes stiff, his eyes become unfoucused and his features become shadowed. he rises*

Elina backed away slightly, he rose stiffly, as if he was unused to using limbs or being impeded by physical objects, not with the usual grace his movements possessed.

Sithis: *voice becomes deeper and harsher* you meddle too deep child. you disturbe things that should not be disturbed.

Elina: I-

Sithis gesures towards the door it slambs shut locking her in the room with him. He moves closer his limbs still moving awkwardly.

Sithis: beware child for soon retrebution for your deeds come. beware child for soon punishment for crimes past and present shall become yours. beware child of the wroth of the fallen angel, beware of the wroth of those you have sinned.

Sithis swipes at her with a hand, a single cut marks her cheek, and red blood trickles from it.

Sithis: you have been marked. and no weapon, no spell can save you. your doom comes soon.

Sithis falls, his body limp and collapses on the floor. his body shudders as light dances along his tatoos and dragon marks. his eyes open again and become focused.

Sithis: *rising* im sorry my lady, i appear to have fainted. where were we again?

Elina: *hurried smile* doesnt matter. i'll be back tomorrow with some more curses for you to complete. goodbye.

Sithis: *inclining his head* farewell.

Elina opened the door and left the room, once it was closed she shuddered. and then there were those times he frightened her, a harmless prisoner, whom never the less possessed depths that even she in her almighty power could never pathom... perhaps that was why she kept him alive...
Charles Phipps

12-01-06, 12:50 PM		OOC: A fun break from the current arc.
Stupid Marish Tricks

Marish: You know, I'm not getting nearly enough attention!

OOCharles: Well Marish, it's understandable that the more conflicted characters would get the Lion's Share.

Marish: But I'm the lion!

OOCharles: Well then....share.

***

Ketler: I bet Marish will LOVE this new cologne.

*Marish leaps in the air and tackles Ketler*

Ketler: Then again, maybe gazelle isn't the best scent.

*Marish sucks on his hand*

***

Marish: YAWWWWWNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!

*Rose walks by and then holds open Marish's jaws before sticking his head in*

Rose: TAH DAH!

Marish: Grrrrrr.

***

Marish: I hunt in the manner of my ancestors!

*crouches into pouncing position and then stares at her prey in the form of an extra value meal on the table*

Narrator: The Lion shifter has sensed the bargain for the McRib.

***

Marish: I had the strangest dream where I was eating a yummy buffalo. But when I woke up, Ketler was gone!

Ketler: I took a hint when she started sniffing me.

***

Marish: Hey Ketler, you want me to lick you?

Ketler: Don't lions use that to strip the flesh off their prey?

Marish: Do you want me to or not!?

Ketler: I don't know!

***

Marish: *bops and dances to her Ipod* OH WEE MO WAY, OH WEE MO WAY! IN THE JUNGLLEEEEEE! THE MIGHTYYYYYY JUNGLEEEE!

*is hit with an old boot*

***

Marish: I love the Circle of Life.

Bunny: Birth, mating, and death?

Marish: No, mate, sleep, and eating!

Bunny: Meh, close enough!
Chrys

12-01-06, 02:19 PM		Aero: Hey Daddy! How come we don't have any thing to do all these epic plots?

Ducky Because our entity is a lazy bast*rd...

OoChrys: Zzzzzzzzzzz

Aero wow be fell asleep while he was writing this...

Ducky then how are we still talking... wait I don't want to know.
rampant

12-01-06, 02:45 PM		Dorvos - mmmmmmmmmmMMmmmmmm

Aero - No I don't know where they're hiding the food

Dorvos - hmmmmmmm

Ivy - This way

Lisa - Wait you actually know what he's saying?

Aero - No we just apply our thoughts and impulses to his humming and pretend we do.

D'Ducky - This is her not so subtle way of saying i'm hungry.
Chrys

12-01-06, 03:13 PM		D'Ducky: Why is my daughter named after a crappy final fantasy spell?

OoChrys: Er... it was either that or the plant thing that Rose's family has going.

D'Ducky: I'll stick with spell then. Also It seems gotten less chaotic then before?

OoChrys Er... A wizard did it!

D'Ducku :rolleyes:

**** Else where ****

Nalfein Damn it there are on to us :eek:
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-01-06, 03:21 PM		Katra: I give to you...none other than Eberron's newest Goddess.
13: Cool, you can join our god club.

Bunny: We don't even meet.

13: Details, details.
********
At Erk's Place:

Lucky: So long as we're choosing people as champions for the Eberronian gods, who d'you think's the Traveler's?

Erk: It would have to be someone who brings gifts that are suspiciously useful and possibly dangerous at the same time, has many forms, and is Chaotic Abivalent.

Rose and Jarlot enter.

Rose and Jarlot: Why is everyone looking at me? :confused:
rampant

12-01-06, 05:13 PM		Various dieties crowd around the door to the ir'Tessiers' quarters.

Kol Korn - I certainly know better than to go in there.

Shadow - How are we supposed to make them our champions if we can't get in there?

Fury - Wait out here like the rest of us.

Bunny - I was wondering why you were so happy.

Silver - I have no idea what your talking about.:D

Bunny - I assume these losers were your idea

13 - Yep:D
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-01-06, 05:23 PM		……………
OOC: You get an :incog: for great use of CC as suggestion.
rampant

12-01-06, 06:29 PM		Rose - Oiy not again do you realise she's bagging paid maternity leave from two jobs!!

Jarlot - Jus *hic* one its summer for the island :pint:

Rose - You know dad it would be nice to have one conversation with you sober.

Jarlot - Stop driving me to drink with your spoonyness.

Rose - The crew drove you to drink not me!

Jarlot - Your captain now, everything is your fault. Upto and including the day of mourning.

Rose - Hey!
--------------------------------------------------

Satnak - You little minx you did it again *hugs Serene*

Serene - What can I say, I love what carrying does to your libido :plotting:.

Satnak - :embarrass

Lisa - So you gonna just keep Satnak fat and happy or are you ever gonna give it a shot.

Satnak - :lightbulb:

Serene - :eek: (gets dragged back into their bedroom)

Lisa - (looks at Dorvos) Looks like your spending the night.

Dorvos - Hmmmmmmmm

Lisa - Of course there will be ice-cream...wait a minute :uh-huh:
Kaizer_Ryu

12-01-06, 07:49 PM		OOC: Why is rampant the only one doing anything? :weep: It's EPIC, people!

:P Whatever. I've been doing so much silly stuff lately, I needed to do something overly serious for this arc. Maybe I'm trying to get it all out of my system at once.

IC:

Elina's mindscape

Two versions of Elina can be seen amidst the chaos. From every direction, voices can be heard. They run the gambit from kind and gentle to vicious and cruel, but most fall into the background of painful mourning.

Elina: :weep: :mad: I told you to go away! You're mean and awful and I hate you! :weep: :mad:

Elina: But I am you. Like it or not, I am all you are afraid to admit to. I am the darkness that rests within you. You deny me, but you cannot erase me.

Elina: That's not true! I would never dream of doing things as terrible as you do. I love my mommies. All you ever think about is destroying them!

Elina: You say you do. But is it true? Perhaps all you do is fear them. Perhaps you resent them, despise them for what they did. They do not trust you to be responsible with your own power. That is why they keep it from you! They are afraid of what you will become!

Elina: You're wrong. Mom did that to protect me! When I can deal with it properly, my power will reveal itself to me.

Elina: What guarantee is there of that? Sure, the other seals have unbound, but what about the final ones? Haven't you noticed? The ones that keep the greatest reserves at bay show not even the slightest hint of fading. That is because they never will!

Elina: :weep: Go away! I don't want to hear any more of your lies!

Elina: Denying my words doesn't make them less true. You will see things for what they are in time. When that day comes, I will be waiting...

One form fades as Kitsune appears in Fox form. She rubs up against Elina's leg, trying to cheer her up. Elina picks her up and cuddles her tightly.

Elina: I don't understand. Where did she come from? Even though I only met her a few days ago, it feels like I've always known she was there. There are times I wonder who is in control... But if I'm not...then is she right? Am I merely in denial?

Kitsune: I cannot answer these questions for you, my friend. But not is all as it seems here. Do not be too quick to judge yourself. I know you will find the answers for yourself.

Elina: I wish I was as confident about this as you are. I wanna wake up. What happened to Mom? I can't feel sis anymore, either...
rampant

12-01-06, 07:56 PM		Meanya - So cold!

Tirmek - What did you do to Elina? How are you jamming our communications? Answer me hag, or do you need another taste of Incarnum's Light.

Meanya snaps out of her (faked) funk, and brings her claws along Tirmek's left arm.

Meanya - Foolish to underestimate me boy!

Tirmek - Foolish to underestimate me, witch *chomp*

Meanya - Get it off of me its eating my hand!
Kaizer_Ryu

12-01-06, 08:51 PM		Maenya finally disloges him with a quick faceful of wall.

Tirmek: *shaking his head* What is it with me and these things?

Sarah: *wincing* It's a...convenient obstacle for the Entities to use...in order to make the battle more interesting.

Tirmek: Meaning that they're all a bunch of bastards.

Sarah: Though not quite Magnificent.

Tirmek: They have their moments.

Maenya: AHEM! :ahem:

Sarah: *tries standing* Hold your horses, you old hag. (i.h.h.) Oh, the irony of that term.

Tirmek: Feeling better?

Sarah: Not in the least. If Paul Atreides thought he had it rough with that Gom Jabbar, he'd be unpleasantly surprised with how this feels. Now talk, Hag! Why can't we contact anyone!

Maenya: You wish to know that badly? It's rather simple. The Dhakanni were clever little bastards. Too bad the Daelkyr broke them.

Sarah: And Elina?

Maenya: *wicked grin* That you'll have to ask Katra. But rest assured, you'll be with her soon...champion of the Fury.

Sarah: NEVER!
urial angel of death

12-01-06, 09:10 PM		OOC: Sorry I didn't have access to a computer. I will be posting a few things shortly. Volrath's reaction because he has to know what is happening to Terra. A continuation on the main twenty years later arc and something on Kale's twenty years later arc.
rampant

12-01-06, 09:15 PM		Tirmek - Champions... I WON'T LET YOU DO THAT TO MY FRIENDS!!!

*smash*

I won't let you or anyone else force them to become pawns to those cretins!!

*crush*

I know all too well what thats like!

*crunch*

I won't let you!!

*martial strike "Finishing Blow"*

Meanya (badly beaten) - (i.h.h. i think I struck a nerve, too bad he broke my jaw, and a good deal of the rest of my bones)
Kaizer_Ryu

12-01-06, 10:02 PM		Buttercup flees from the Harpies, but is slowly tiring out. Carrying dead weight was beginning to take it's toll.

Buttercup: (This is not good...)

She then hears a strangely familiar voice in her head.

???: Turn right at the next hall and kick the fourth panel on the left.

Buttercup: :confused: (Ok, that was weird. But I really don't have any better ideas, so...)

When she does what the voice instructed, a large blast door slams shut between her and the Harpies. The startled screeches and painful impacts of the Flight can be heard through the door, and then there is silence.

Buttercup: (Wow. That worked out better than expected.)

-----

Maenya lies defeated against the wall as Tirmek and Sarah try to determine their next course of action.

Maenya: My forces are everywhere. You may have beaten me, but what about an entire squad of Trolls in this enclosed space? How long can you hold out? *laughs* Do you feel that rumbling? My sister is becoming more powerful by the minute at the expense of your dear mother. Give up, and I may forgive you for this insult.

Sarah: Bite me.

Teraza: That would be inadvisable.

The blind seer warps in nearby. Tirmek prepares to face her as well, while Sarah struggles to see straight.

Maenya: Where the hell have you been?! Help me out here, will ya?

Teraza: You must find your sibling. She and the celestial beast approach the north corridors. Follow this hall till you reach the main hall, then head right. You will meet her there. You are both in terrible danger so long as you remain apart. Even now, she slides farther down the path of destruction. Save her from herself, and you save us all.

Tirmek hesitates, but Sarah immediately hightails it in that direction. Unwilling to leave her alone, and surprised at her speed in the condition she's in, he follows soon after.

Maenya: :mad: What do you think you're doing?!

Teraza: If Katra is allowed to continue, all we have worked for will come to naught. Droaam will fall and we will cease to be. Beyond that, it will trigger events too horrible to describe. By doing this, I ensure we will not disappear entirely. *heal*

Maenya: ...you always were the odd one out.

As her wounds mend, Maenya stands slowly. Then, a question strikes her.

Maenya: What did you mean by "disappear entirely"?

Teraza: There are so many possibilities here. So many decisions that have an equal chance of either outcome. There is no guarantee all three of us will survive.

Maenya: Then what the hell did you let them go for?!

She begins to take off after the children, but is stopped when Teraza grabs her arm.

Teraza: If I did not, our demise was inevitable. Leave them.

Maenya stares at her sister for a moment, then screams out of frustration and takes off down the hall in the opposite dierction Sarah and Tirmek went. She really needed to kill something. Perhaps that Paladin, or maybe the goth. So long as blood was spilled, she didn't care.
urial angel of death

12-01-06, 10:12 PM		Alone and frightened Hamilton wanders the FF's hallways. He bumps into Catherine.

Hamilton: Agh... oh it's just you. Use your powers to get us out of here!

Catherine: No.

Hamilton: What?!

Catherine: I'm not afraid of you anymore.

Hamilton: You will fall into line this very-

A golden glow pours from her mouth and eyes and tendrils of plasma arc out from her.

Hamilton's screams can be her for miles around (admitidly only a small portion of the FF, but still)
urial angel of death

12-01-06, 10:31 PM		OOC: Kaizer Sephiroth was the Zorastrian equivalent of a pope.

IC: Volrath was getting closer he knew it. The shape of water was a powerful type of Mythos artifact. Each one had a variety of similar powers. The trigger to activate each power of any given sphere, that were progressively harder to learn based on power. Thus often when one fell into ignorant hands it was often used for minor tasks. In fact aboleths in the Realms only know to use it as a guard system. This was the first time that one of the shapes' medium powers was activated by any other than a daelkyr.

If he didn't get to it before the hags learned of its greater powers Eberron was likely to be slated for immediate destruction. And the demolition crew would be one far more powerful than the tiny force that the hobgoblins repelled so long ago. It would be one of monumental proportions.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-01-06, 10:58 PM		OOC: Why is rampant the only one doing anything? :weep: It's EPIC, people!
OOC: Some of us don't do epic.

OOcat: Some of us can't do epic. :P

OOC: Quiet, you. :mad:
Kaizer_Ryu

12-01-06, 11:28 PM		OOC: Of course mortals do most of the work. The gods in Eberron (for the most part) are unable to exert much influence on the world because of the Progeniter Dragons. They are forced to work through those who can do things. And who says the Shadow isn't doing anything? The gods don't have to be all "Here I am! Look at me! I'm a god, so you have to pay attention!" Arijani, Theronas, Halester, the Hags, each has done the work of the Shadow in their own way. Some were just more aware of it than others.

Though, yes, being called the Champion of a certain god is merely a title, but it also denotes a certain connection. What that connection is depends on the god. Sarah has the passion of the Fury ingrained in her. Terra drew power from the Shadow directly for a while. Jarlot is a spawn of Khyber. Elina sees deep into a dimension of the world that most mortals scarcely even dream exists. There is a reason for their respective roles, but what it is has not yet been revealed.
urial angel of death

12-01-06, 11:32 PM		The library's doors explode inward, sailing over Elina and Sithis's heads. In the entryway stands Kerrith. Much of Kerrith has changed over twenty years. His once golden yellow eyes are now a tainted red color, and countless scars criss-cross all over his chest and face. The most notable change however is the fact that he is now a drider. From his waist down his body is that of a large hairless purple and red spider.

Elina: Well you are full of suprises. I thought that pendulum had killed you for sure.

Kerrith: Chimera making* has saved countless heroes of my race in the past and it didn't fail this time. Now I will give you one last chance to do this peacefully. Let my people go!

Elina: Fat chance! That crystalized plane is far to powerful of an energy source to just give up.

Kerrith: Then we'll just have to do this the hard way, love.**

* Chimera making is the process of fusing two or more animals together in this case it was Kerrith and his spider familiar
**Kaizer it is up to you if Kerrith is just doing this to annoy her or if it has a seed of truth.

OOC: I'm not sure of Elina and Sithis's capabilities at this point so could someone else right the fight. For purposes of spellcasting assume that if a spell is in any official D&D product in any edition, Kerrith is knows it and might have it prepared. First among these of course is 3rd edition haste.
rampant

12-02-06, 12:36 AM		Tirmek - *sniffsniff* She went this way. Gotta find her, gotta find Elina. Gotta get them out of here! (turns to follow the scent) Sarah!

Sarah - I got their scent!

Tirmek - I got yours, hurry up ahead! *mindlink* (we'll keep in touch, i got your back)

Sarah - (thanks) *Zoooom*
Kaizer_Ryu

12-02-06, 12:39 AM		OOC: There's a reason she's in charge.

Elina: Indeed we shall...

Sithis knew better than to interfere. He had seen her ruthlessness first hand on countless occasions. He was well aware that with little more than a word, her forces would tear him to pieces. Those spirit creatures were the driving force behind her power. Unlike incorporeal creatures, they could not be hit with anything but Soulstealing weapons or high level spells. Even then, they were notoriously difficult to hit. Most of them were merely soul fragments. If you didn't hit the part of them that still existed, you had no chance at all. Even if you got past all that, the miss chance still applied.

Elina: Your former master would be pleased to see you cheat death so many times. In fact, would you like to show him first hand? :devil:

Kerrith: You wouldn't dare.

Elina: Come now. We dated for five years before I found you a liability. You know what I'm capable of...

Kerrith prepared his signature move, learned from his late master.

Kerrith: FIREBALL!

*COUNTERSPELL*

The spectral form of Nalfein, grotesquely malformed and missing half his face, floats nearby. Aside from his features, there is no indication the fire-obsessed maniac still even knows who he is. Considering he carried no memory of his former life, this was to be expected.

Elina: :smirk: Do you like it? You never did see what I did to him.

Kerrith: *clenching his fists* I certainly heard it.

Elina: Find the right lever, and you can move the world. I found his, and I know yours. Goodbye.

As he stared at the mockery that was his former master, Kerrith failed to notice the spirit creatures gathering around him. When he did, he merely sighed.

Kerrith: Well played. I'll be waiting for you on Dolurrh.

His grisly death was swift, but quite painful. Blood spatter hit Elina in the cheek as she watched gleefully. She licked her lips sensually as Gregory disposed of the body and his mindless soul joined the ranks of her hellspawned armies.
rampant

12-02-06, 12:54 AM		Tirmek - (two coming goblin shocktrooper by the sound, and maybe a small gnoll or half-orc, you keep going I'll hold them back...Don't you dare come back for me before you find Elina.)

Sarah - (grrrr... Got it)

Tirmek waits around the corner as the targets approach.

Tirmek - Hiyaaah *swooping eagle strike*

Lily - Ouch! DAmmit Tirmek!

Miko - :heehee:

Tirmek - Good You can help me in the reargaurd.

Miko - Why should I help-guhuk

Tirmek - If you don't I'll kill you myself! Now think for one moment, look me in the eye and convince me you're more afraid of the goblins and trolls and such than me and I might just lay you out and make Lily drag you around. *glare*

Miko - (oh gods those eyes I hate those brown eyes) I'll get you for this Rakshasa.

Tirmek - Wait until Sarah and Elina are safe, then settle your score with me.

Lily - Who died and made you boss!

Tirmek - If we fail here: a lot of people *mindlink* (everybody in?)

Miko - (trippy)

Lily - (whoa)

Sarah - (ugh her?)

Tirmek - ( Someone needs to hold off the troll coming while Lily heals me)

Miko - HeY!
rampant

12-02-06, 02:56 AM		Lisa - This kid is scary on so many levels.

Dorvos - :bigeyes:

Lisa - One of them being, your ability to look cute while chewing through half the fridge, and a good chunk of the pantry. Too bad I mean that literally.

Dorvos - *Chomp*

Lisa - That chair was made of iron.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-02-06, 03:30 AM		As she drew closer to Elina, Sarah noticed several rather disturbing things. First, time seemed to slow down. The faster she ran, the slower everything else seemed to go. Second, colors ran together till she could no longer trust her vision. Closing her eyes, she ran on touch, hearing, and instinct. Third, she could hear a chorus of voices. She immediately wondered if this was how Elina felt every day, but figured it was not that. They all said the same thing, over and over again: "Deny the Dark One his place."

Lastly, and certainly most unpleasantly, the burning got significantly worse. By the time Buttercup rounded the corner with Elina and nearly ran into her, Sarah had little comprehension of anything around her. With the two only feet apart, Sarah lost all sense of her position and crashed to the ground.

Lilly: *sitting her up* Come on, snap out of it! She's right here!

Whether she even heard him, he could not tell. Even Tirmek's link had been cut off. They all had experienced a glimpse of what she did, but they could not understand it any better than her. Buttercup allowed Tirmek to remove Elina from her back, then quickly retreated behind Lilly.

Tirmek: *setting her down* Fascinating...

Lilly: Now is not the time to practice your Spock impression.

Tirmek: :rolleyes: *groan* I think I know what's causing this. Why, I have no idea, but it's a start. One of their seals is trying to unwind.

Lilly: Of it's own accord?

Tirmek: I haven't the slightest idea. But I do know this one has been fading for a while. I was beginning to wonder when it'd open.

Miko: :bored: Whoopty-do...

Lilly: Any ideas, smart guy?

Tirmek: Just one.

Walking over to them, Tirmek places Sarah's hand in Elina's. For a moment, nothing happens. Finally, the girls react and grasp tightly. The resulting shockwave knocks the rest of the group down. When they look back, the girls are surrounded by an orange ball of light.

Elina's mindscape

Sarah: :D Sis! *hug*

Elina: :confused: Sarah?

OOC: Ok, I'm gonna leave it at that little cliffhanger. Must...sleep... :zzz: I'll finish it tomorrow morning. Just FYI, the orange ball has effectively sealed them off from outside interference.
rampant

12-02-06, 03:57 AM		Tirmek - On your feet grunts we still have a horde to smack down.

Lily - Oig it never ends!

Miko - How about not.

Tirmek - Drooam, female prisoner, do you need me to spell it out for you?

Miko - Cheap ass, using logic.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-02-06, 09:30 AM		OOC: ………………
OOC: *sigh*

OOcat: Told you.

OOC: *DELETE POST* <<I didn't like it anyway.>>
******
Tirmek - On your feet grunts we still have a horde to smack down.
Bunny: *bristling with weapons* Ready.

Lilly: I don't suppose you'd be willing to tell us if we survive this thing?

Bunny: Why does everyone think lifespan is predetermined?

Lilly: So the future is open to us surviving?

Bunny: So long as you don't do anything stupid.

Miko: I'm not taking care of the girly horse.
Charles Phipps

12-02-06, 11:14 AM		20 years later

Lilly: Now to go for the source of Elina's power.

Tirmek: Are you sure you want to handle this alone?

Lilly: I just killed one of the only two women I've ever loved. Yes.

*Lilly heads into a chamber where a woman is tied to an alter by black branches of darkness that tie to her arms and legs while she struggles with her body covered in other branches. They merge into her and seem to drink her blood*

Lilly: Hello Terra.

Terra: You've finally come.

Lilly: Yes...but too late. Elina is dead.

Terra: ......Kill me.

Lilly: Terra, no...

Terra: I was supposed to be the Redemption. The chance for evil to find new life in the world. Instead, they killed Lisa and then my own daughter killed all that was good in me. Now I'm just the HATE.

Lilly: I can free you. Sarah is still....

Terra: It doesn't matter! My power is bent! All I can see is the darkness again!

Lilly: I....you were like a mother to me.

Terra: GODS DAMN YOU LILLY! ONLY YOU CAN DO IT!

*Lilly pulled out his holy avenger, not from a sheath but one composed of his very essence as a living being. The blade that could cut souls*

Lilly: I'm sorry.

*The blade slid into Terra's heart and cut through multiple dimensions at once before it struck the soul of the Hate*

Terra:....Lisa.

*The castle began to crumble as the dark power flooding from her into the armies of the Queen of Darkness was suddenly cut off and they collapsed to the ground*

Tirmek: It's over.

Lilly: *Lilly lit up a cigarette* Yeah, for all its worth.
Lord Kale Fangblade

12-02-06, 12:09 PM		During the Final battle between Elina and the heros

the door to Sithis's room explodes open and the doors crumple against the walls, Sithis emerges from it, his black silk duster flutters behind him in an ethereal breeze. his black shirt is covered in runes and sigils of black light shaped like dragon marks, they surround his torso like armour. about his waist is his spell component pouch, and attached to his belt are similar compartments of holding that contain his many magical items and personal belongings.

he raises a hand, and similar runes like the ones about his torso form around his hands. the rune above his right eyebrow glows crimson as he draws on more of his power.
he gestures to the end of the passage way, and a bolt of crimson eldritch energy oblierates the statue.

Sithis walks through the smokeing rubble, his boots crusing the remains of the spells that sealed it. he smiled as his magic flooded his very form, the supression magic that held a good portion of his power back had been broken. with Elina's power fadeing he'd been able to break free of her wards.

there was the metalic clatter of armour as a figure approached him, Sithis recognised the face of gregory, his sword drawn gregory stopped before him.

Gregory: Sithis, quickly, we must assist Elina. she does battle with Tirmek, Lilly and Sarah. Quickly follow my lead.

Gregory turns to leave but stops as he see's Sithis unmoving.

Gregory: what are you waiting for Vampire! our mistress is dying. she needs our asistance!

Sithis: No.

Gregory: you dare ignore your masters orders?

Sithis: yes, i do. she's going to die gregory. i've seen it.

Gregory: Your twisted words wont sway me traitor. i shall cut you down for your insolence!

Gregory swung his sword at Sithis's head, Sithis blurred as his energy wreathed hand parried the sword, he grabbed its blade and twisted it from Gregorys grasp with little effort.
Sithis then drew on his magic and struck Gregory with an eldritch blast formed from black light.
Gregory lay sprawled on the floor, blood running from the cut above his eye, he rose, and turned to face Sithis once more.

Sithis: your dareing is suprising Gregory. but you know you cant stand against me.

Sithis struck Gregory with another eldritch blast, Gregory rose again.

Sithis: give it up gregory, you cant win.

Gregory: never.

Sithis: *sigh* then it appears im going to have to kill you, you stand between me and freedom. and even though your bravery and loyalty are admirable, i simply cant allow you to get in my way.

Gregory: you talk to much

Sithis: its an evil villian thing. Verdra!

bolts of crimson energy leaped form Sithis hand and burrowed into gregorys flesh in explosions of blood and gore. the skin began to be stripped from gregorys form as he screamed in pain, Sithis smiled as Gregory writhed in pain.
Gregory stopped moving, leaving only a blackened skeleton as the spell finished its work.

Sithis strode past him and down the corridor, the shadows writhing and dancing in his wake.
Charles Phipps

12-02-06, 12:20 PM		http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2006/05/19

Ahh Penny Arcade, it summarizes the adventures of Lilly in the future.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-02-06, 01:03 PM		Elina's Mindscape

Elina: I heard your voice, but I couldn't see you.

Sarah: Me too. When I felt your presence, I just latched on.

Elina: Tell me what's going on! What happened to Mom? Is everyone ok?

Sarah: Mom's being held in some kind of magical prison that's transferring her power to Katra. The rest of us are ok for now, but the longer we're here, the more danger they're in.

Elina: Then let's find the way out as fast as possible! We have to save Mom!

Sarah: Agreed. Do you know why you're here? What have you been doing?

Elina: I keep getting visited by someone who looks like me. But...the things she says...they're just...

Sarah: Unlike you?

Elina: They're horrid! I refuse to believe someone like that could be part of me!

Sarah: We'll see. There are a few questions I have for this "dark side" of yours.

From behind them, a voice sends shivers down their spines.

Dark Elina: Ask away.

Sarah: *turns* Who are you?

Dark Elina: Isn't it obvious? I am all that the sister you see denies about herself.

Elina: That's not true! You are nothing like me!

Dark Elina: Denial is an ugly thing. I hate to see myself so deep in it.

Sarah: Shut up.

Dark Elina just shrugs and sighs as she shakes her head condencendingly.

Elina: See? She won't go away, but she says I'll never get out of here till I accept her.

Dark Elina: It is how things are. The seal now trying to break will not do so till you become whole.

Sarah: Maybe not. Why did you not appear before?

Dark Elina: I was not needed. But you've seen it youself. Tirmek's cunning and your own fury set you apart from us. We may be a formidable opponent, but we cannot win with strength alone. I embody the spirit she needs to move on. Being too kind is a weakness that will get both of us killed.

Sarah: You're right sis. This one is nothing like you.

Elina: But she speaks some truths...

Sarah: Sis!

Elina: We both know it. I just...can't keep up with you two. You're blowing past me, and I don't wanna be left behind.

Sarah: I don't care if you're not the greatest warrior ever! I don't want my sister becoming a crazed psychopath just to stay on par with me! I want you to be yourself!

Dark Elina: Then help me convince her to join with me. I am part of her and she knows it. Denying me is the same as denying her existance.

Sarah: Who are you, really? Ever since we entered Droaam, I've noticed something weird. What do you have to do with Sora Katra's plans?

Dark Elina: Ah, yes. It was her that awakened me. She knew I would be needed for the coming trials.

Sarah: Thus I can't trust you. That b*tch will pay for what she did to Mom! Anything to do with her is no good.

Dark Elina: *sigh* Time is running out. I had hoped to do this peacefully, but I also embody her survival instincts.

At this, she attacks Sarah with blinding speed. Being Elina's mind, Sarah stands little chance as she is knocked away effortlessly. Elina stands there, terrified at the prospect of combining with all she hates, but unable to run away. She backs up, but trips and falls, landing rather hard on her hindquarters.

Dark Elina: Accept your fate. This will be a lot less unpleasant all around if you go willingly.

Sarah: No, Elina!

Elina: :weep: I don't wanna! I don't wanna! :weep:

As Dark Elina reaches out, Kitsune leaps on her arm and begins biting. She swings around, trying to disloge the spirit fox as she strikes it repeatedly.

Elina: Stop it! Don't hurt her!

She finally tears the small spirit animal off her arm, then viciously slams her into the ground. Kitsune growls, then falls limp.

Elina: :weep: No, no, nonononononononono!!!!! :weep:

Sarah: You have to fight back! If you want to be you, take control! Don't let her assimilate you, you must domnate her!

Dark Elina: *turns* You're wasting your breath. She is too weak. Even though she faces oblivion, she still cowers.

Sarah sees something entirely different. The look in her sister's eyes is unlike any she has seen. She had found it. Seeing her beloved Kitsune so viciously beaten had struck a chord. The rage was building...

Sarah: (i.h.h.) Take is, sis. Make it your own.

Dark Elina: *turns back* Now, where were w-

The look of shock was priceless. In a heartbeat, Elina had run her through with nothing more than her hand. A dual image of Elina could be seen, the main one, and an incorporeal and far more feral version of herself.

Dark Elina: *cough* W-what...?

Elina: You are not me. You have no place here anymore.

Dark Elina: So it seems...

The fake begins to melt into shadows, dropping to the ground in a pool of darkness.

Shadow: But I am not done with you yet. Though I was not your dark side, I spoke the truth about it's nature. I will always be watching you, guiding you, and you will come to my side soon enough.

The Shadow fades, and the background settles down. Elina walks over to Sarah and reaches out to lift her up.

Elina: All that coming from the god who got pwned by Mom.

Sarah: *sniff* Sis...I...

Elina: What's the matter?

Sarah leaps up and gives her a huge bear hug. At the moment of contact, they find themselves back in the real world, the Brow seal unbinding in a flash of magical energy. Sarah still holds Elina tightly as they come to grips with the situation.

Sarah: :weep: I thought I was gonna lose you... :weep:

Elina: I'm sorry, sis.

Tirmek: Uh...I hate to break up what is obviously a very heartfelt moment, but...

The girls look up to see a large force of Trolls bearing down on them from both sides.

Elina: Ready?

Sarah: And how.

OOC: Ok, they're back up to speed. I'll be gone for a while this afternoon, so here's your chance to crush some spleens.
rampant

12-02-06, 01:53 PM		Troll leader - Oh no its that pyscho Rakshasa from the ring! Run for your privates privates.

Tirmek - Come Back here and fight me!

Hobgoblin Champ - How about a rematch Kitten!

The veteran warrior rushes in trying to use his superior mass against Tirmek. The younger demi-humanoid flips over the large hob and slaps him in the face with a glowing palm.

Tirmek - Here's ice in your eye!

H.C. - My eyes what did you do to me you overstuffed slipper.

Tirmek - I've frozen your ocular units, goodbye.

Sarah - TOO EASY!

rip tear maim maul

Tirmek - ... I'm gonna go help Lily now this corridor is covered. In every sense of the word.

Bunny - (wearing a foam finger with Sarah written on it) You go girl!
urial angel of death

12-02-06, 03:06 PM		OOC: This is in Kale's version of twenty years later still.

IC: Elina blasted Sarah, Tirmek, and Lilly backward with a burst of soul-powered energy.

Elina: I finally have you annoying pests beat.

Dozens of magic missiles slam rip into Elina's exposed back, and throw her to the ground. She looks over her bloodied shoulder to see Kerrith who's face had the type of smirk on it that just makes you want to hit the person with it.

Kerrith: Did you really think me stupid enough to come to you in person after you tried to kill me? If master and mother taught me anything it is that paranoia will save your life.

Elina: How? I felt you soul.

Kerrith: Oh that, I projected my image onto a random monster I summoned up, and I altered its soul to resemble mine.

Slowly the room filled with hundreds of copies of Kerrith.
rampant

12-02-06, 04:10 PM		Dorvos is sitting on the railing.

Dorvos - hmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Serene - Should we let him stay there?

Satnak - I'm fast enough to catch him, besides might get him to lear to fly.

at knee height

Shred - Mew (flicky thingy!)

Mittens - merr ( i know it'll bite me but i must catch flicky thingy)

Tear - mew ( so flicky )

Rip - purrr ( left..right..left..right..pounce!)
Kaizer_Ryu

12-02-06, 06:30 PM		OOC: I think that's enough with adding in scenes to the future arc. The one-upmanship is getting out of hand. Like this: Elina would never be fooled by such a trick. No amount of magic can truly copy a soul, and she's a bit of an expert on the subject.

Well, she will be, anyway.

IC:

Medusa: Suck on this! *Petrifying Gaze*

Sarah: *MASSIVE FORTITUDE SAVE* *points* Ha-ha!

Medusa: :eek:

Sarah grabs the unfortunate Medusa by the snakes, which quickly find they are unable to get through her gauntlets. She yanks down and back very hard.

Medusa: :weep:

Sarah: Now be a good girl, ok? :devil:

She picks the Medusa up and tucks her under her arm (don't ask how). She then turns to the troll forces.

Sarah: *cha-chunk* Say hello to my little friend!

*Rapid-fire Petrifying Gaze*

There are now several very life-like Troll statues scattered about.

Sarah: Boo-yah.

Medusa: :weep: Can I go now?

Sarah: *tosses her down the hall* Go away kid, you bother me.

Elina: :rolleyes: Show off.

Sarah: I can say the same to you. :P

Elina: *holding a club she stole from a Fire Giant* What can I say? I feel better than ever.

Fire Giant: That club-

*SMASH*

Fire Giant: *ugh* -was a present-

*CRACK*

Fire Giant: *augh* -from my Mom! :weep:

*CRUNCH*

Elina: Is that why it's signed "To my honeyschnookums. Mommy loves you."?

Other Fire Giants: *snicker* Momma's boy. *chuckle*

Fire Giant: :allalone:

Elina: You should be worried about yourselves instead of kicking someone I've already beaten on. Jerks. :mad:

Other Fire Giants: :eek:

*KERSMASH*
Charles Phipps

12-02-06, 07:05 PM		Lilly: Oh for Dol Arrah's sake. How the hell do I get lost in an evil palace away from everyone else?

Miko: Because you suck.

*Flies behind him, despite only batting her wings occasionally*

Lilly: Will you STOP that?

Miko: No.

Lilly: Creepy icky Goth person! Hasn't anyone told you Goth is dead! It's for a bunch of LARPers in their parents basement!

Miko: Your verbal dismissal of everything I stand for makes you very attractive. :inlove:

Lilly: What? Keep away from me you freak!

Miko: It's a form of rebelling too.

***

Miko's childhood

Queen Elina: Remember, never fall in love with a paladin.

*Little Girl Miko in a oversized black t-shirt holds her :88E: doll*

Miko: Okay mom!

Queen Elina: Now, I'm going to feed Rover.

:behold: Woof!

***

Lilly: UGH!

Miko: In any case, I'm going to serve the cause of evil by slaying Sora Maenya.

Lilly: Huh?

Miko: Think about it? What's worse to the cause of evil than the perception we're a bunch of ugly people?

Lilly: Eh?

Miko: Vampires, Succubi, Hollywood celebrities like my idol Winona Ryder. These are the kind of evil things that make our world of darknessTM into the preferred path from good.

Lilly: Uh huh.

Miko: But ugly, nasty, and hissing things like the Hags make us look like we're a bunch of monsters.

Lilly: You keep a plush :88E:

Miko: That's because Lovecraftian horrors are nifty.

*The Hag herself steps out of the shadows*

Sora Maenya: Do you actually think you have a chance of slaying ME little paladin? You're a child!

Lilly: I'm old enough to kill.

Sora Maenya: A short thing like you has no chance to do anything but feed my appetite for flesh.

Lilly:......what did she call me?

Miko: Short, the opposite of tall. Small. Puny. The masculine form of petite. Dwarf like and not in the beer swilling bearded berserker kind.

Lilly: :headexplo :censored: :tantrum: :banghead:

Sora Maenya: Awww, is the cute WIDDLE paladin going to hurt me?

*Lilly pulls out his 6 foot long sword and slams it into the ground in front of Sora*

****

Forgotten Freedom

*Thunder Clap*

Aerith: Did you hear that?

Rose: *reading watership down* Yeah, that's just Lilly showing off his status as an Arcane Paladin.

Aerith: A what?

Rose: One of those homebrew prestige classes. Basically, he gets to add his levels in Wizardry to his smiting ability.

Aerith: Oh. What's his current level?

Rose: What level is Dragonslave? Andrea taught him that last week.
rampant

12-02-06, 09:27 PM		Tirmek - There you are Elina and Sarah are back up and taking care of the rear gaurd we gotta clear a path though.

Miko - He's busy Posturing at the hag.

Tirmek - :twitch: this is getting old!
Tirmek grabs lily from behind by the wirsts.

Lily - Hey keep your paws off me *Lit-3*

A blast of Electric death clears one of the corridors.

What the hell!!

Tirmek - ITs just a counterclockwise circle with the left hand and a line through it with the right. Sarah, Elina, We're leaving!

Both - On it.

The kids beat a hasty retreat down the scorched corridor.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-03-06, 01:53 AM		Katra: That was...unexpected.

She has finally dragged herself off the ground after the massive shock of the power overflow. The power drain has been stopped for the moment. The shaking of the ground had also stopped, but anyone sensitive to magical energies could feel the turmoil. The massive shift in power had destablized the very foundations of the world. Dragonmarks had begun to go wild, seals behaved strangely, and magic in general seemed ready to malfunction. The barrier around the Crag was the only thing keeping the chaos from spreading, since it stretched across multiple dimensions.

Katra leaned against the wall, trying to maintain her hold on what she had absorbed as she stared at Terra. In return, Terra stared back at her with a glare that would have burned through Adamantine had she not been so drained.

Katra: Come now, my dear. You'll be staying here for an awfully long time. You should try and enjoy it. :devil:

Though she couldn't talk, a single somatic component made her feelings quite clear.

Katra: Defiant to the last. But I suppose that's a byproduct of the breeding process.

Terra: :confused:

Katra: You didn't know yet? Hah! Oh, how lucky for me!

She walks up to the pool till she is inches away from Terra's face.

Katra: :devil: You were planned. Your wife was planned. Your spoony half-brother was planned. His children were planned. YOUR children were planned. Even the great Jarlot "Batman" Jarlot was planned.

Terra angrily beats against the edge of the pool as she tries to reach Katra. She tries to speak, but the water mutes her.

Katra: You're old enough to hear this, so shut up and pay attention. Arijani once mentioned that your wife's birth was intended. Do you think it stopped there? He only wanted her, but there is a much larger plan in motion. One that will unleash the power of the Dark Gods upon this world. Did it never occur to you exactly how preposterous your relationship with a Paladin of the Silver Flame was?

The weight of Terra's glare can be felt through the water. So much so that it forces Katra to blink first.

Katra: Get mad all you like, it doesn't change the truth. Though I must admit, you falling head over heals in love with each other was an unexpected bonus. The relationship was expected to be...less than consensual on her part. You were also never expected to carry her child. No, that honor was to be for your half-brother before you became aware of that little piece of information.

Terra: :yuck: :yuck: :yuck:

Katra: However, it seems that the next generation may be taking care of that. The young Paladin may not survive this encounter, but when he is brought back, one of your daughters will eventually enjoy his company. :evillaugh

Terra struggles to cast, but cannot draw anything out. Katra waits till she gives up out of frustration to continue.

Katra: The good Captain Jarlot managed to largely skip his role thanks to that blasted Solar Deva, but his children are still open. The young Keeper of the Flame, the Schizo Blackguard, or even the Nazi Youth wannabe Catboy. Each carries the genes necessary for the continuation of the plan.

Terra stares at her, forced to listen to this rant. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. It sounded like a bad ripoff from a classic Sci Fi novel series. Probably one with sand. And that had creepy Ninja Nuns that acted like True Neutral Vulcans. And would probably involve hallucinogenic Chibi-Giant Worm death-vomit. Best to stop that line of thinking...

Katra: Once you have been stripped of most of your power, you will be released under our supervision. Do not think you have outlived your usefulness to any of us. *chuckles* You're probably wondering: "Us who?" Don't worry, you'll find out in time. You're still immortal, after all. And how lucky for us. You are prime breeding stock. We would be loth to throw you away carelessly... :evillaugh
rampant

12-03-06, 02:27 AM		Tirmek - (atop the hag's shoulder) Now I wonder If my family fits into this plan, because quite frankly I could use more info about this knightmare prince person everyone gets me mixed up with.

Katra - Your close enough to kill me, why haven't you?

Tirmek - I'm good at energitics, but I simply lack to power to do any real damage quickly enough for it to take.

Katra - I hate distractions (flings Tirmek into the ceiling)

Katra turns to parry the charging Sarah.

Katra - Nice try whelp! gyak

Elina - You talk too much! (steps out of the shadows beneath katra holding her mind blade in its morning star form)

Lily - Yes! someone finally put that glorified rat muncher in his place

Sarah - Grrrr

Lily - I mean halt Witch

Miko - Not that I care but you're surrounded.
---------------------------------------------------

Terra - Run girls get away!

Tirmek - Even if they could hear us they wouldn't.

Terra - What! how?

Tirmek - Stupid hag needs to learn the difference between "down" and "out".

Terra - Projection!

Tirmek - Yep, so whats the rules in here?

Terra - :confused:

Tirmek - :rolleyes: 3..2..1..

Terra - Grrrrrrr

Tirmek - Draining you directly huh?

Terra - I can try to hold back, but i can't pull back anything once she gets it.

Tirmek - One way then, 3 options

1. We mash the device.

Terra - Hag's protecting it too well

Tirmek - 2. Try to break the flow from inside, that would take about an hour

Terra - Too long

Tirmek - 3. Screw the flow to hell and back in about 3 seconds

Terra - That one!

Tirmek - Ok you know Sarah transfered to the wilder course correct?

Terra - Yes she already has stealth, and the power selection wasn't to her taste in the Lurk courses.

Tirmek - Her Wild surge ability allows her to safely overclock her psionic power for a time. Katra lacks the mental training to do this.

Terra - You're saying we can overload Katra.

Tirmek - Sort of We also should shape the power so she has trouble using it. IF she's as ameturish as I think we might even be able to burst a few vital organs.

Terra - I like this plan.

Tirmek - Ok we have to do this right the first time or she'll find me in here. Next time she pulls, send everyting you got but wrap the celestial based powers around the outside, also anything that is anethema to Katra or hags in general. I'll layer a coat of Incarnum around it to make it even less paletable.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-03-06, 04:19 AM		OOC: A few things about this machine. It takes what it is told to, though the Hags have only a "I'm pretty sure that's what this means" understanding of the exact functions of the device. Only the Daelkyr can really operate it correctly. Terra has no say in what goes out when and how fast.

Katra told it to dive into Terra's deepest reserves and got fried, so she had to turn off the flow. She now wields most of the powers of Terra's mortal form (but is, as you hinted at, an amateur with most of it), and a few of her goddess form (really only a bit of the shadow powers, still an amateur). She will retain these powers till the flow is reversed, Terra is released and takes them back, or Katra is killed.

A word of caution. Breaking the machine or screwing with the flow carries the danger of destablizing the massive energies being meddled with. All four major pillars of the world are in play: Divine, Arcane, Psionic, and Shadow. In her hubris, Katra has created a situation where one or more of these forces could be thrown out of balance. Needless to say, that's a bad thing.

IC:

Volrath: I wouldn't do any of that if I were you.

Sarah & Elina: Uncle Volrath!

Tirmek: How'd you get here?

Volrath: :rolleyes: Please. This machine was designed and built by my Great Uncle Yulareth. That barrier isn't that hard to get through if you know the pass key.

Katra: And who's side are you on, whelp?

Volrath: You happen to be holding one of my best friends in there. What do you think?

Katra: :mad: Have you forgotten all I did for you?

Volrath: You sent us on suicide missions, messed with my friends minds repeatedly, and screwed us over when you decided only Terra was any use to you anymore.

Katra: Ungrateful bastard!

With a blast of magical energy, Volrath is blown to pieces.

Miko: That was SO COOL!!! :D Uh...I mean... :bored:

Sarah: Now you've done it.

Elina: I think that's what he was waiting for.

The pieces melt into a goo and begin flowing onto, and then into, the machine.

Katra: Damn Half-Breed! What do you think you're doing?!

*STAB*

Lilly: Stopping you. :P

Katra: You dare defy me? I hold a power greater than all of you combined! *prepares to blast Lilly*

*CRACK*

*FIZZLE*

Tirmek: What good is power if you cannot use it? You're little more than an amateur with a big gun. What has taken her decades to master, you cannot expect to wield in an hour.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-03-06, 08:31 AM		Katra: [anything about breeding stock]
Silver: :twitch:
*********
Elina: Did anyone else just hear that?

Sarah: Like the entire universe crying out in terror and then running away like a scared little bunny?

Elina: Exactly.

Meanwhile Lilly stabs a hobgoblin guard who has managed to get into Katra's chamber. There is a pause after the paladin removes the blade. Despite being stabbed pretty much straight through the heart the hob seems perfectly fine.

Lilly: Uh, shouldn't you be dead now?

Hob: What, it's not more than a flesh wound.

Lilly: I can see through your chest!

Hob: A completely harmless cut, I can assure you—

Tirmek's swing takes off his head.

Hobgoblin: Oh, well, there you go, you've moderately inconvenienced me. Good job. :mad:

Tirmek: I get the feeling that Death isn't here right now.
********
On some slightly-removed plane of existence…

Fury: KILLKILLKILLKILL!!!!!

Shadow: I do not believe you grasp the full magnitude of this predicament. Clearly the god of death who usually fulfills the dispatching duties about these mortals has—

Fury: KILLKILLKILLKILL!!!!! :tantrum:

Shadow: Yes, yes, calm do—right. In any case, I have contacted our comrade The Keeper and he should be arriving any moment now—

Silver appears in a puff of passion-fruit scented smoke and lovebirds.

Shadow: And who might you—:mymy:—(voice several octaves higher) be?

Fury (as the Shadow crumples in pain): Wheeeee!!

Shadow: Don't just stand there you psychopathic fool! Get her!

Fury: Grrrrrrr!

Silver: :rolleyes:

Fury: Hurhggghghghrrrrrrrr!

Silver: You don't want to attack me.

Fury: I don't want to attack you!………:confused:

Silver: In fact, you've always had this paculiar fascination with the shadow.

Fury: Hmmmm.

Shadow: What are you………………:eek: Dear us, no!

Fury: Mmmmmm.

Shadow: I'm too Goth for you!!

Silver: You like Goth.

Fury: Me like Goth.

Silver: Goth people are very passionate about what they do.

Fury: :drool:

Shadow: <there is not smiley to duplicate this expression>

Silver: No one messes with these guys except me!
***********
Elina: Sarah? Hello? You've been standing there for the last five minutes.

Sarah: Huh? What—oh, I was just watching Miko fight.

Elina: Miko?

Sarah: I was just thinking: Goth people aren't so bad. I mean, their just passionate about what they like. (slight look of :love: )

Lilly: :yuck:

Tirmek: (i.h.h. :mad: )

Elina: :mymy: Ooooooookayyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
***********
Several mutliverses away………

Bunny: That should be far enough. :bored: I just wonder why 13 didn't come with me.
rampant

12-03-06, 11:29 AM		Tirmek - Awww so I don't get to fiddle with the primal pillars of creation? :bigeyes:

Volrath - No bad Tirmek, no tinkering with a delicatly balanced doomsday device for you, now scram kid you're bugging me.

Tirmek - awwwww:( -returns to his body-

----------------------

Tirmek - (closer..just a little bit more..) Gotcha !

I don't care how tough you are a Hammer to the back of the head is unpleasant to say the least.

Katra - WHY WONT YOU DIE!

Lily - I've been asking the same question.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-03-06, 12:41 PM		Katra - WHY WONT YOU DIE!
Shadow (still writhing in agony, and with the Fury to…………cotend with): Damn! Where is he?

Keeper: Sorry I'm late, had to deal with this weird influx of calls for……………:eek:

Shadow: Oh dear game designers, he broke! I wonder if I have Nerull on speed-di—NO! BAD FURY! BAD FURY! LET GO OF MY…………
********
Several multiverses away…………

Bunny (relaxing in a deck chair, a Blood of the Slain in one hand: :cool: I wonder if they'll appreciate death more after this?
rampant

12-03-06, 01:40 PM		OOC: Just to get this straight

Dorvos 5 years

Elina 10 years

Sarah 10

Cole ?

A.W.L ?

Schroedigger ?

Rashour 5?

Lady 6-7?

Help?

Kitten 10 years

I'm looking for physical/mental equivalents

Tell me if i'm wrong or help me fill in the blanks, please
----------------------------------------------------

Dorvos - HMMMMMMMMM!!!!!

Magpie swarm - chitter

Dorvos is dashing around the top deck avoiding a massive trail of magpies.

Lisa - Explain this.

Satnak - Dorvos's crysthral abilities make him one giant shiny object.

Lisa - And you aren't eating bird pie, because?

Serene - 3..2..1..

Fluffy - Meow (lunch time)

*firestorm dragon blast*

Dorvos - Hm (gets conked on the head with a roast bird complete with little paper things on the drumsticks)
Kaizer_Ryu

12-03-06, 02:45 PM		OOC: I think that's mostly right, rampant. I figure A.W. Lightningbolt, Schrodegger, and Cole are all about the same age as Rashour. The chaos magic of the ship seems to affect the little ones more than anything else, so they age faster. Though it slows down as they get older, it obviously stops aging them mentally a bit later. ;)

IC:

Fury: *smoking a cigarette* Was it good for you? ;)

Shadow: :twitch:

Keeper: *comatose on the floor*

Devourer: :headexplo WHAT IN ALL EXISTANCE IS GOING ON IN HERE?!?!?!?!

Fury: :eek: Daddy?!

Devourer: :mad: You are in so much trouble young lady! Make yourself decent while I take care of something.

Shadow: :weep:

*VICIOUS BEATING*

Fury: :inlove: :drool: *TACKLE*

Devourer: Wha-! NO! BAD FURY! STOP THAT THIS INSTA-! :eek:

Sliver: :cool:

Keeper: Ugh...oh, my head. I don't think I could ever see a sight more horri-

Fury: Mmmmm...daddy...

Devourer: NO! DON'T DO THA-!

Keeper: ................:twitch: :twitch: :twitch: *faint*

13: :evillaugh

OOC: Sorry, couldn't help myself.
urial angel of death

12-03-06, 03:13 PM		OOUrial sits down next to Bunny.

OOUrial: Didn't work the time I broke my ankle, doubt it'll work for you. Pass me that root beer.

----------

OOC: I will be doing a few finishing things for the twenty years later, but only what Kaizer allowed.

IC: OOKaizer: She never really liked you so the plan you are about to reveal wouldn't have worked.

Kerrith: What? She did too!

OOKaizer: No she was just toying with you.

Kerrith: She liked the gifts. :(

OOKaizer: And...

Kerrith:weep: *in the future disappears in a cloud of Kaizer-logic*

OOUrial: You killed Kerrith!

OORei: You Bastard.

----------
Kerrith now in the afterlife floats around with very bored. But then he sees something that makes him very interested in getting away from his location very quickly.

Kerrith's Mother: Oh so my failure of a son has finally ended up here! I had hoped you could make a powerful heir or a memorable hero, but no!

Kerrith: The PCs never showed up!

Mother: That's no excuse. Giving up on that I thought you could be a memorable villain, and you just ended up being a pathetic toady. When you actually killed me for her I considered you might at least be getting some action in the bedroom, but due to my lack of grandchildren I can assume that isn't the case.

Kerrith: It was complicated...

Mother: No it was very simple! You handed over your plane on a silver platter for some girl with a nice butt.

Kerrith:I died trying to get it back.

Mother: But you failed! Almost doesn't cut it.

Jarlot: Don't mean to interrupt, but I'm getting lonely.

Mother: Oh I'll be back in a second sweaty.

Kerrith: Mom! What about dad!

Mother: Till death do us part.

Kerrith: He isn't dead yet!

Mother: Well if you are so upset stop me from dying.

Kerrith: I can't change the past!

Mother: Yes you can.

Kerrith: Fine. *gets to work on time machine and reviver.*

OOC: Don't worry, Kaizer, unless you want him to he won't actually change the past. He may try, but he will fail repeatedly and possibly even be the cause of what he wanted to prevent. Ala Lord of the Necropolis. In fact if you really don't like this idea just have him fail to make it all together, I just thought it might have humor potential.

IC: Non-Kale version of twenty years later after Elina's defeat.

Deep in the dungeons of Elina's fortress Gregory awaits the fight that is surely coming. He heard footsteps on the stairs. They weren't the slow soft footfalls of his mistress, nor the shambering steps of her minions. They were coupled with the sound of metal banging against stone and armor plates sliding over each other.
Down the staircase came Lenneth another of Volrath and P/Y/R's children. She wore white and blue armor covered in all manner of celestial symbols and signs.

Lenneth: Gregory, Gregory, Gregory you poor thing. You had an honorable death, the kind of death that all paladins aspire to. A hero’s death, in defense of your master and teacher. She took that away from you. Why do you serve her?

Gregory: Thrane is gone, Lisa is dead. Without Elina my life has no meaning.

Lenneth: You could have helped Tirmek and Lilly.

Gregory: *his hallow black eyes take on a slightly lighter hue* They would never take me back, not after they saw what I was and still am.

Lenneth: Oh Gregory, do you really think that we wouldn’t accept you for what you are.

Gregory: *eyes are now a light shade of grey* Even if they would back then, they will never forgive me for all I’ve done, all the friends I killed.

Lenneth: No one is beyond redemption.

Gregory: *his eyes have now completely regained their color* Thank you, but I am.

Gregory draws his shortsword, and stabs it into himself. He first cuts up the center of his torso and then across him stomach. Silvery blood spills out of his wounds and begins pooling on the floor.

Gregory: Please. :(

Lenneth draws a rainbow hued katana and cleaves Gregory’s head from his shoulders. She then retreats up the stairs, and tries to hold back the tears.

OOC: Will finish with Stewie later.
Crystalforged

12-03-06, 03:51 PM		OOC: Hey guys, sorry I've been so quiet lately, Finals week is almost upon me so... yeah... Anyways I'm going to try and finish up my little plotline with Kitten so I can hand her off to Silver.



IC: Kitten is somewhere in the lower decks. Running for her life. Both the half-tosters and the half-biscuts are hot on her heels. Working together. Each group is yelling something about her being a crime against their ideologies. Suddenly kitten stumbles across a one room flat sitting by itself in the middle of a cavernous chamber. The half-toasters and the half-biscusts come to a halt at the edge of the chamber and after looking at each other for a moment turn and flee in opposite directions.

Kitten: (catching her breath) That was odd...

Voice: Oh, we have a visitor it seems my pretties.

Kitten: (spinning around) Who's there?!

A very old, human woman comes to the door of the flat. She has a large tabby cat sitting on her shoulder.

Woman: Hello dearie. What are you doing in a place like this? I hardly ever get visitors.

Kitten: Um, I'm Kitten. I just got kinda lost and then these people all started chasing me and I ended up here.

Woman: Is that so. Well do come in, let me get a better look at you.

Kitten: Ok

Kitten walks throught the door and into the flat. It is a humble place, simple funature sits here and there and the place is quite frankly in ill repair. Nor is it particularly clean or well organized. The most striking feature however is the cats. They're everywhere and they number in the hundreds. Pictures of cats hang on the wall with cat shaped mugs on the table, cats are litteraly everywhere.

Woman: Now lets take a look at you. (moving around examining Kitten) Oh aren't you just precious and cute as a button too.

Kitten: Um, I'm sorry but I didn't catch your name.

Woman: Oh dear, how rude of me! My names Miriam dearie. Would you like a cup of tea?

Kitten: That would be nice.

Miriam makes a bit of tea and then sits down at the table with Kitten. A number of cats sit on the table as well and another jumps in Miriam's lap as she sits down.

Kitten: So if you don't mind me asking, how did you end up living down here in a place like this?

Miriam: Oh ho ho, thats a very long story but since you asked I'll tell you. I used to live in the Eldeen Reach for a long time and I was a druid under the great druid. I was very lonely back then since I didn't have my pretties (rubs a cats head) did I? I grew older and I decided I should maybe I should retire somewhere. Back then I though I might be going senile but now after talking to my pretties enough I know I was wrong. I hadn't realized what I was missing yet. So I started looking for a place to settle down. I ended up living in a flat in Sharn. I found I didn't take to the city very well so I spent a lot of time in my home where I was very lonely. Then one day this stray kitty wandered into my home all on its own. So I took it in. The next day another kitty came by and I think you see where things went from there. Everything was fine until this nastly little pirate ship came by one day. It blew Sharn all to pieces. Well I figured, if they took away my home I might as well go live in theirs so I managed to cast a spell to transport my flat onto their ship and I ended up here. I've been living here ever since.

Kitten: Gee, it must be kinda lonely down here all by yourself.

Miriam: Oh, your so funny. I'm not alone, I have my pretties. They keep me company. Talk to me, tell me things. (conspiritorial whisper) Like the fact that the stove is really a demon. (turns around to face the completely normal stove) You hear that demon? I'm on to you! You won't get away with your food heating ways for long by golly! I've got you figured out!

Kitten: :uh-huh: I see.

Miriam: Yes well, thats my story more or less.

Kitten: (getting up) Well it was realy nice meeting you Miriam.

Miriam: Hm? Where are you going?

Kitten: I'd like to stay longer but I prmised John that I would come back and talk to him for a while later so he'd have some one to talk to other than :coolcthul .

Miriam: Oh, your not leaving. Your one of my pretties now. No one leaves Miriam. No one leaves Miriam alone again. You stay with Miriam forever. And ever. And ever. And ever...

Kitten: I'm sorry but...

Miriam: NO ONE LEAVES MIRIAM ALONE!

Kitten: AAAAAAAHHH! (flees the flat into the darkness)

Miriam: (Multiple casting of animal growth) Catch her my pretties! She is one of you, she cannot leave Miriam! (the now elephant sized cats bound off after Kitten)

Half-tosters and half-biscuts: Run for your lives! The hunters are loose! They are coming!

Kitten: (running as fast as her short, chibbi legs will carry her[which is actually a hell of a lot faster than you would think]) Must run. Scary cat lady. Must run. Scary cat lady. Must run. Scary cat lady. Must run. Scary cat lady. Must run. Scary cat lady. (a number of cats finally manage to surround Kitten) :weep: Why does this always happen to me.



OOC: One more post and I think I'll hand her over to you silver.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-03-06, 04:14 PM		OOC: Don't worry, Kaizer, unless you want him to he won't actually change the past. He may try, but he will fail repeatedly and possibly even be the cause of what he wanted to prevent. Ala Lord of the Necropolis. In fact if you really don't like this idea just have him fail to make it all together, I just thought it might have humor potential.
OOC: Beware your attempts to change a past that has yet to be written, for you may bring about a fate worse than the one you dread. :devil:

That means you too, cypher. ;)

*generic :plotting: motions*

IC:

*chink*

Volrath: *in the machine* Oops.

*OMINOUS RUMBLING*

All: :eek: :hides:

Nothing seems to happen.

All: :confused:

Volrath: Whew. I guess we got lucky there. This would be so much easier if Great-uncle Yulareth kept his :censored:ing blueprints!

Elina: I suddenly feel far less confident about our survival...

Volrath: Oh, don't be so pessimistic. So I don't have the directions. I'm a man! Real men don't need instructions. We instinctively know how anything and everything is put together.

Lilly: Exactly!

Sarah, Elina, Terra, Miko, Buttercup, & Katra: :nonono:

-----

Whale: *in the air, falling quite fast* Wow! This is amazing! Hello? Who am I? What's my purpose in life? What's this thing rushing past me very fast? It's sort of a whooshing thing. Well, I guess I'd better start naming things. I'll call it...wind! Yes. And what's this big round thing coming at me very fast? It's so big and round and...ground! That's a good name. I wonder if it'll be friends with me?

*SOUND OF WHALE LIQUIFYING UPON STRIKING ROCK*

The only thing the bowl of petunias thought as it fell was "Oh, no. Not again."
Norr

12-03-06, 05:11 PM		OOC: One more post and I think I'll hand her over to you silver.

OOCNorr: To Silver? :twitch: As in the god(gender neutral) of fertility?
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-03-06, 05:46 PM		OOC: Sorry, couldn't help myself.
OOC: I wish there was an award for that, but there isn't. But you may note in you sig that I said that.
Gregory draws his shortsword, and stabs it into himself. He first cuts up the center of his torso and then across him stomach. Silvery blood spills out of wounds and begins pooling on the floor.………Lenneth draws a rainbow hued katana and cleaves Gregory’s head from his shoulders. She then retreats up the stairs, and tries to hold back the tears.
OOC: I feel compelled to give you a :fight!: for that accurate harakiri.
OOCNorr: To Silver? :twitch: As in the god(gender neutral) of fertility?
OOcat: Silver, as in Silvercat.

Silver: She's already half-mine. :rolleyes:
rampant

12-03-06, 06:16 PM		Satnak - Hold your thumbs here, otherwise they'll get crushed. Tighten those fists. You want to strike with the first two knuckles. Rotate your body to put maximum impact into the punch, then pull backs even faster to amp up the bite. 10 minutes no stopping go!

Serene - 10 Minutes? he wont even have sore knuckles by then.

Satnak - The point is to make sure he can stay in form that long. The hardest part of learning to fight really well is ingraining everything down to below instict level.

Serene - ... We're gonna need better punching bags.

Satnak - I have a nice adamant pillar in my gym for the kicking drills.
lordalm

12-03-06, 07:35 PM		OOlordalm:"Time to become one with the FF."

OOlordalm: "Going to need something/one to represent me."

OOlordalm: :plotting: :schemes: :thinks: :waits: :lightbulb

OOlordalm: "Oh Chapter Master ALM!!"

Chapter Master ALM: "Is that you my Emperor?"
<falls to knees in supplication>

OOlordalm: "No its your creator though."

CMALM: "My creator, blasphmous cretin! Show yourself and be smitten by the might of the Emperor's chosen champions!"

OOlordalm: <gives CMALM slurpy brain freeze>

CMALM: "ARGHH! Follow spawn of chaos! What manner of sorcery do you inflict upon me?"

OOlordalm: "Speaking of Chaos you'll be switching allegencies to Chaos Undivided. I recristen you Chaos LordALM!"

ChaosLordALM: "Never will I surrender my faith in Chaos to serve the False Emperor!"

CLALM: :eek: :twitch: :twitch: :nonono: :censored: :headexplo

OOlordalm: "Well time to send you over to the Forgotten Freedom. You'll join the crew there and make friends with the one called Lilly. You're mission is to keep Lilly on the straight and narrow as a Paladin. And by straight and narrow just encoarge anything the one know as Terra tries to diswade. Oh and I am going to grant you the powers of a Chaos Sorcer. That should give you some defense against the psychers and mages onboard."

CLALM: "Great one, why would I help the girl Lilly in this way?"

OOlordalm: "Lilly is a boy, don't ask. And it should result in all kinds of chaos. Especially that whole 20 years in the future thread. Oh and try to send me a mental picture of Miko. Goth asian hottie...:drool: "

CLALM: :looloo:


.........................


OOlordalm: "It will be interesting to see what the rest of them make oh my addition."

13: "Won't it though." :ahem:

Bunny: "Second that." :ahem:

Silver: <rolls eyes, but can't use smileys because of 15 smiley cap>
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

12-03-06, 07:50 PM		OOC: Rampant, Cole would be about sixish, if I can be bothered to come up with anything for him. :embarrass

Also: to all entitys its going to take me a while to get Ash ready for his next twist, in the mean time Im painting a target on his back; mess with him, do as you like short of violating his charicter, it may give me some ideas... :plotting:

Ash "But why?"

OOEled "Your pain-"

OOAll-entitys "-Amuses us!"

Ash :hides:
rampant

12-03-06, 07:54 PM		Clalm (I'm lazy deal with it) - Well its not so bad here, I'm getting a bosst from all the free chaos energy!

Liam - Free nothing Punk Fork it over! Thats my weirsan you're sponging!
--------------------------------------------------------------------

Clalm - Ok that could have gone better. Oh a kitten!

Rip - :confused:

Clalm reaches out to pet Rip.

Rip - Meow (touch me and you'll pull back a stump)

Clalm - Such a cute kitty you arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh MEDIC!!
-------------------------------------------------------------------

Mickey - New guy huh? hows the first day going?

Clalm - ... Don't talk to me.

Mickey - thats amazing for a first day
---------------------------------------------

Ash - Ok why blue?

Chalky - You've been mopy since the Nid Invasion.
------------------------------------------------------------

Cole - Bored

A.W.L. - Why does no one like us?

Lady - I feel unloved.

Rashour - Its not that bad.

Schroedigger - Says the guy who has two entities. One scene in a parody and I'm branded as a hitler wannabe. No one cares about my painting.

Gregory - Don't make me stuff you in a box.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-03-06, 09:42 PM		Terra: Volrath, please hurry. The longer my power remains divided, the greater the chance for irreperable harm.

Volrath: I've got it down to three channels. Thing is, I'm not sure which one is the input, which one's the output, and which one's the stablizer.

Terra: Well...33% chance of success isn't so bad when you consider the odds we've faced before...

Volrath: Or I could be completely wrong on all three accounts and be preparing to sever all dampers on you, thus releasing both the drained energy and what you still retain in one gigantic burst that would crack open the very surface of Eberron and release every spawn of Khyber sealed within.

Terra: ...you just had to tell me that, didn't you?

Volrath: :( I didn't want you to be mad if I ended up destroying everything by accident and hadn't warned you...

Terra: *shakes her head* So, assuming you're correct on the channels, what happens if you pick the wrong one?

Volrath: Well, if I hit the stablizer, this thing goes haywire and any number of things could happen. Most likely would be you all die. I'm trying to avoid that.

Terra: Always good to hear.

Volrath: If I hit the output, Katra will be unable to gain any more power.

Terra: I get the feeling there's a modifier to that seemingly good bit of information.

Volrath: The shield goes down as well, letting the chaotic destablization of magic spread to the rest of the world, increasing the odds of a catastrophic collapse. I'm not quite ready to witness the end of the world, so I'm gonna try and not do that either.

Terra: I appreciate that as well.

Volrath: If I hit the input, we have the best chance of getting you out. Thing is...I'm not really sure what will happen to what's already been taken. Far as I can tell, it will either snap back violently, remain in Katra and need to be forcefully extracted, or explode.

Terra: *sigh* Can't there just be a 'Reverse' button?

Volrath: Sorry. There was never any point in reversing it. Divine beings were never intended to be placed in here. Once you went in, you weren't supposed to come out.

Terra: Katra said I was to be released once I was too weak to oppose her.

Volrath: Her knowledge of the workings of Mythos artifacts is limited. How she discovered the medium powers of this thing I'll never know, but she still doesn't think like a Daelkyr.

Terra: That it would require logic to include an 'Off' switch, 'Reverse' button, Emergency Shutdown protocol, Safety locks, or Override command?

Volrath: You know it.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-03-06, 10:19 PM		Terra: Volrath, please hurry. The longer my power remains divided, the greater the chance for irreperable harm.
13: Like what? Having two Terras?

Silver: :schemes:

13: :eek: Now I know how Bunny feels.

OOC: Actually, I think Lady would be around 4. Unlike the other kids on this ship I've made it a point not to accelerate her aging. Being the kids of a celestial and fiend she's still mentally mature for her age, but she's only growing at the rate of a normal human.
Charles Phipps

12-03-06, 10:31 PM		Awwww poor Kitten. Strangely, I always find her misadventures more fun than the serious story arcs. In my opinion we need to make a Miyasaki movie out of her efforts.

Marish: I must train her to be a courtesan!

TWO!

Or whatever she is!
Charles Phipps

12-03-06, 10:34 PM		As I wait for Kaizer's next PM. I was thinking it might be interesting to do alittle OOC fun in THE SECOND ANNUAL FORGOTTEN FREEDOM AWARDS basically, give an award you make up to one of the crew for their antics and describe it in the humorous manner possible. The only rules are it can't be one of your characters, give as many as possible.

The "Most likely to be Made into a Disney Animal Trek Flick" Award goes to Kitten for her many trials and tribulations for being innocent and fuzzy.

For example.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-03-06, 10:37 PM		OOKaizer: Actually, she meant that all existance could be reduced to nothingness. Meaning the three of you would be out of a job. At least in this universe.

Silver: :weep: I'd end up losing some of my greatest work and never get to see what would come of the twisted relationships between the younger generation on board my floating :pile: machine?

OOKaizer: Unfortunately.

13: :weep: I lose all the built up trauma, angst, and neurosis in this wonderful bastion of madness and chaos?

OOKaizer: Indeed.

Silver: Should we Rule 2?

13: Not yet. The humor level is too dangerously low to do anything of any lasting impact.

OOKaizer: :confused: ...no commentary on how Krozen has nothing to do with this?

13: Were you expecting as much?

OOKaizer: Well, um...yes...*pause* You're good at this.

13: :devil:
Crystalforged

12-03-06, 11:09 PM		Most likely to be shown up by his own mount : Lilly

Most likely to be the subject of a my little pony reference: Buttercup

Most likely to have her existance forgotten before long: Catherine

Most likely to become a paradox: Miko (after all I'm betting the future she comes from is going to be prevented but she isn't going to dissapear)

Infant most likely to cause catastrophic devestation: Stewie

Most likely to cause a great deal of distress to her grandaughter: Aeirth (poor, poor Miko. It's been mentioned already but more MUST be done with it)
Kaizer_Ryu

12-03-06, 11:26 PM		Most likely to cause each crew member to be related to all the others in some fashion without reducing the percentage of :pile: on board: Silver.

Most likely to capitalize on the trauma from the above result: 13

Child most likely to grow up normal by non-FF Eberron standards: Ivy

Uber least likely to do anything useful when a crisis arises: Nalfein

Uber most likely to cause said crisis: Nalfein
rampant

12-03-06, 11:38 PM		Lisa - Two Terras hmmmm:)

Elina and Sarah - Two Moms:eek:
---------------------------------------------

Satnak - (over a toilet) This part I do not care for.

Serene - Holding her hair back, you know hun I think you'd be cute with just a touch of curl on the ends.

Satnak - Next you'll want me to dye my bangs.

Serene - Never! Silly girl, I just want you to take a little time and consider a little change. It'll do you good.

Satnak - I'm done you need the pot?

Serene - I'm fine:D .

Satnak - Disgusting.
rampant

12-04-06, 12:12 AM		Most disliked by Satnak Still alive - Terrek

Most likely to be stuffed in a box - Schroedigger

Most Likely to die in a gutter - Lily

Lily - HEY!
Kaizer_Ryu

12-04-06, 12:32 AM		Most likely to get a divine favor out of Terra: NO ONE! STOP ASKING!

Most likely to feel the wrath of a goddess if he don't stop trying to bribe her daughters with candy: Ketler

Least likely to get any sweet lovin' in the next twenty years: Ketler

Runner up: Kerrith

Honorable mention: Nalfein
Paulon

12-04-06, 01:34 AM		Most likely to have a new Purge declared against him by the Church of the Silver Flame: Ketler.

Least likely couple: Earl and John.
Charles Phipps

12-04-06, 08:00 AM		Most Likely to be End up in a Dragonbalz fight at the end of the game Terra and Satnak.

Most likely to learn the secrets of frosted flakes making from tony: Tirmek.

Most likely to join with Miko to form an All Girls team of Spies: Sarah and Elina.

The "Morticia Adams" Award. Most likely to be blissfully happy in deeply disturbing but loving marriages: Tie between Satnak and Serena, Terra and Lisa.

The "More amusing than Crow" award: The Commentator crew.

The "Best Original God" goes to Bunny sorry.

Most underused character award: I have to say our beloved Awakened Keel.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-04-06, 08:01 AM		Least likely couple: Earl and John.
Silver: You sure? :confused: Because I could swear it's "Anybody and Ketler."

Most necessary crewmember: Bunny.

Most overly-dramatic family: the house of Sa'vor.

Most underused kid with disturbing origin (OOcat: wait, isn't that all of them?): Admiral Wolverene Lighteningbolt

The closest family relationship to banjo-playing without going over: Aerith, Saberiel, Lady, Michael, Miko.

Most powerful crewmember:……………………………:bored: How stupid do I look?
Crystalforged

12-04-06, 09:30 AM		The "Morticia Adams" Award. Most likely to be blissfully happy in deeply disturbing but loving marriages: Tie between Satnak and Serena, Terra and Lisa.
I'm going to have to challenge this one. Personally I'd say this either has to be a three way tie or it needs to go to Kanatash and Caralot. You don't get more deeply disturbing than that.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-04-06, 09:34 AM		Most likely to be the subject of a my little pony reference: Buttercup
OOC: Already did that.
13: The problem is that he'll be riding a My Little Pony knockoff for a few years. :P
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-04-06, 09:38 AM		I'm going to have to challenge this one. Personally I'd say this either has to be a three way tie or it needs to go to Kanatash and Caralot. You don't get more deeply disturbing than that.
OOC: Seconded. Plus Caralot has the sort of blissfully unaware quality that all the other couples lack, except maybe Marish.
rampant

12-04-06, 11:05 AM		Tirmek - *raging Mongoose strike*

Lily - Mongoose?

Miko - Laaaaame

Tirmek Unleashes a typhoon of hammer blows.

Katra - OWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW

Tirmek - DO NOT disrespect the mongoose.
Gladius_Lucix

12-04-06, 11:29 AM		Least likely to get any sweet lovin' in the next twenty years: Ketler

OOGladius: This may be a bit inaccurate. You may recall, after Ketler blew up the Weirsan Probability Drive, that Liam contracted Terrek, Kithle, and 13 to come up with a proper punishment.

13: I think what Ketler needs is a girlfriend.


----
OOC: I'll come up with some of my own awards to hand out later.
Norr

12-04-06, 12:26 PM		Lucky: So long as we're choosing people as champions for the Eberronian gods, who d'you think's the Traveler's?

Erk: It would have to be someone who brings gifts that are suspiciously useful and possibly dangerous at the same time, has many forms, and is Chaotic Abivalent.

OOCNorr:
Double-edged gifts? Liam.
Many forms? Chalky.
Chaotic Ambivalent? ... It's the FF we're talking about.

...Caralot? Not unless her male enhancements strangle something...

13: :devil:

Bunny: Like their owner :D

OOCNorr: Quiet you.
...Kanatash? His 'gifts' are... well... mostly negative, though he might not see it that way. He can also take any form he wants... :eek: Kanatash is the Travellers Chosen!

Kanatash: You really want to believe that, don't you :smirk:

OOCNorr: Well, are you?

Kanatash: Oh, I believe you'll find out sooner or later :D. Here, have a drink on me.

OOCNorr: :blink: oo-kaay...
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-04-06, 12:34 PM		OOcat: I still think either Jarlot or Rose. Kanatash's gifts are usually not so unclear on which way they lean.

Character Most Likely to Get Pregnant Next Who Hasn't Already:—

OOcat: Silver! Give me back the keyboard!
Charles Phipps

12-04-06, 12:37 PM		Actually, Rose is the Traveller's Champion by design. The fact he's a Bard is actually part of it.

Traveller: Yes, so apparently even a Champion can suck.

Rose: Oh shut up Nyarly!

13: Nyarly?

Rose: The Traveller is Nyarlathotep. Didn't you know?

Traveller: Peace dude.
urial angel of death

12-04-06, 12:52 PM		Volrath: Yep my dad is everywhere.
DungeonJman

12-04-06, 12:58 PM		Ok, first time poster, with a new character idea, probably gonna get a lot of annoyance, due to the secrets he's discovered, but anyway:

Nobby "Desserts" Ferrins:

Diviner 7 / Loremaster 3

Former redshirt, now scum or whatever is above.

A redshirt, who joined after hearing about the metagame knowledge that Jarlot the second possessed and after he returned from being Thanatos, he had always manged to survive, through some savior in a plot device, especially by using the two secret tunnels that Sa'avor didn't know about.

He recieved the nickname from his adventuring days, when he mistook a fire-elemental gelatinous cube for red jell-o, as a result, while he hates the taste, he is immune to the chili (although doesn't comment on the taste, lest Satnak blasts his head off)

He recently just discovered two powerful secrets and by connection, a bunch of others too.

Nobby: *runs up from the lower decks* I DID IT I FINALLY FOUND OUT THE KEY TO... *looks around*
okayyy, better go back under the deck til this settles down *runs even faster back to the lower decks*
rampant

12-04-06, 03:02 PM		Kithle - :drool:

Rose - Too late he has a name, and the cloning machine is busted.

Kithle - but -

Rose - No Bad ithilid! No genocide for you! Put down the nuclear fire or no cookie!

Kithle - :uh-huh:
Norr

12-04-06, 04:36 PM		OOcat: I still think either Jarlot or Rose. Kanatash's gifts are usually not so unclear on which way they lean.

OOCNorr: :tantrum: Why do people keep taking me seriously?
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-04-06, 04:40 PM		OOCNorr: :tantrum: Why do people keep taking me seriously?
13: Our entity is very dense.

OOcat: :mad:
Chrys

12-04-06, 04:48 PM		D'Ducky So why havn't you written any thing yet?

Chrys I Because some has been hording my New PC to play Neverwinter night 2 ...

D'Ducky is that why you lost the Oo in front of your name?

Chrys what of co... Oh I'm so boned.

13 :evillaugh :devil:

OoAero Hey what button make me smite people who will not given me there stuff?

D'Ducky Are you sure?

Chrys Yes How many times I have to say she is Lawful Good!
DungeonJman

12-04-06, 05:13 PM		Nobby:
It wouldn't matter, you couldn't take my brain out, because it doesn't EXIST!!! *continues heading towards the lower deck*

OOC: No, he is perfectly sane, the brain not existing is part of an abstract concept, which comprises one of his secrets. It is still there, it just doesn't exist.
cypher_zero

12-04-06, 07:35 PM		OOCypher: Hey! No steppin on my turf! I'm the only sane one around here!
.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-04-06, 08:00 PM		OOC: No, he is perfectly sane, the brain not existing is part of an abstract concept, which comprises one of his secrets. It is still there, it just doesn't exist.
OOC: I think there is a sort of concensus here (or maybe it's just me) that sanity is a very bad thing.
OOCypher: Hey! No steppin on my turf! I'm the only sane one around here!
Exhibit A. (;))
DungeonJman

12-04-06, 08:19 PM		Well, not completely sane, you can't be on the forgotten freedom if you're completely sane (he ate a gelatinous cube by accident, remember?), he's just not insane.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-04-06, 08:45 PM		……………
Bunny: Then we still weep for him.

13: Weeping due to laughing at his pain.
Paulon

12-04-06, 10:52 PM		Originally Posted by Paulon

Least likely couple: Earl and John.

Silver: You sure? :confused: Because I could swear it's "Anybody and Ketler."

Ketler has Rosie Palm and her five daughters. Earl and John though... It would be a challenge for even Silver and Caralot to get any results that didn't just burn poor John up. :-)

*ponders creating a character, but decides to put it off at least until not on pain pills with a flu-stuffed head*
Kaizer_Ryu

12-04-06, 11:12 PM		Tirmek: Frickin' hell, why won't you die?!

Katra: I may be inexperienced with her power, but you are still fighting the equivalent of a level 40-ish Outsider.

Sarah: Then we need to get past the Damage Reduction, cancel the Regen, and bypass the Spell Resistance.

Elina: Easier said than done. Lilly and I are the only spellcasters here, and neither of us have anything powerful enough to consistently punch through.

Tirmek: I keep telling you, she still carries the weaknesses of hags and half-fiends! Blunt objects!

Elina: ...wait...Sarah, have you been using your hammer?

Sarah: Yeah.

Elina: Did you deactivate the spellstoring so it doesn't heal her when you strike?

Sarah: ...oh, for the love of-! :doh:

Miko: :evillaugh *decapitates a bunch of Hobgoblins*

Buttercup: *anime sweatdrop* (scary girl...wait, where's Lilly?)

-----

Terra: Are you gonna do anything or what? You're supposed to be the Chaotic one! Just pick allready!

Volrath: *snip* :gah:.....................:confused: Nothing happened...?

*OBVIOUSLY BAD RUMBLY NOISE*

Volrath: Oh crap.

The water begins to boil, causing Terra a great deal of pain. Arcs of energy eminate from the machine, burning anything they touch. Volrath is thrown out of the machine and stays in goo form to avoid further pain. The kids break off their assault on Katra as they desperately try and avoid the beams of death. Though they could probably survive a few hits, they weren't keen on testing that theory. Katra runs toward the machine, hoping she could find a way to salvage it, but is hit repeatedly with energy bolts and finally beaten back.

Sarah: Mom!

Elina: Uncle Volrath! What should we do?!

Volrath: Ummmm...I have no idea?

Tirmek: I'm assuming that's not a good thing he said that.

Miko: Say, where's the strangely attractive girly-named boy?

Elina: :mad:

Tirmek: Over there.

Lilly stands next to the machine, wearing black Ninja robes as the arcs ignore him completely.

Tirmek: How are you doing that?

Lilly: *holds up a sign reading: Energy Resistance and Blur combined with awesome Ninja skills learned from Master Kakashi in the Naruto Universe.*

Tirmek: I don't think that's how it wo-mmph!

Sarah: *whispering while covering his mouth* Don't tell him that!

He looks at the machine for a few moments, studying it carefully. He then pulls out a GIGANTIC warhammer and pulverizes half of it.

All: :OMG! :hides:

The Shape of Water at the center collapses, releasing Terra in a flash of superheated steam as she falls to the ground. Most of the water vaporizes instantly from the energy backlash, but Terra is physically unharmed after a few moments. She is, however, unable to stand as she coughs up at least a gallon of water. The remains of the machine itself fizzle and burst into flame, but the energy arcs cease. Ominously, the rumbly does not.

Volrath: You fool! The shield is down and the destablization can spread! The rajahs may awaken! Sure, I'll also get to see a lot of my relatives, but still!

*Thunderclap*

Lilly walks towards Katra with his greatsword drawn, now in full Paladin getup. The blasts did a number on her as she stands there smoldering but not beaten.

Katra: You may have destroyed the device, but my new power remains! You will not beat me!

Elina: SHUT UP!

She strikes hard with her Soulknives (mace form), breaking Katra's arm and knocking her towards Sarah. She then lands a devestating right hook, breaking Katra's jaw as she flies at Tirmek. In response, he smashes her ribs and sends her flying at Miko.

Miko: Ew! Ugly Evil! Get away from me! *SMITE*

The disoriented hag now flies at Lilly.

Lilly: Can I smite THIS one?

Terra: *cough* YES!

Lilly: :rolleyes: Finally...

*ARCANE SMITE*

The blow hits the beleaguered Hag with the concentrated force of a Bigby's Crushing Tactical Nuke, splitting her in half. Terra's stolen power bursts forth in a flash of light as the rumbling grows violent for a moment, then dies as the energy returns to it's mistress.

Miko: :inlove:

Lilly: *anime sweatdrop*

Elina: :mad:

Sarah: Since when have you cared about who likes him or not?

Elina: :eek: :embarrass ...uh...it's just that...she's such a hussy! Yeah...

Sarah: :nonono:

Terra: Everyone ok?

Volrath: *reforms* I guess. *to Lilly* How did you know smashing it would work?

Lilly: I didn't.

Volrath: :twitch:

Lilly: I calculated the odds of that succeeding verses the odds that I was doing something incredibly stupid, and...I went ahead anyway.

Tirmek: You really are a Spoony Paladin.

Lilly: A Spoony Paladin WHO WAS RIGHT! :P

Tirmek: *groan*

OOC: Ok, I'm not quite done yet, so don't have them return to the FF. I'll do the finishing scene with Maenya and Teraza, as well as a few other things in a bit.
rampant

12-05-06, 12:29 AM		Tirmek - Miko I owe you an apology, I used intimidation to get you to follow me, I am sorry.

Miko - :confused:

Tirmek - Now Did you prep any cure spells?

Miko - Inflict all the way putz!

Tirmek - Typical useless Blackgaurds, always fail to bring healing, Dammit i hate digging this deep into my stash. Ok one each since we're all up Terra should be able to help after that.

Volrath - Ummm i have a stash but...(reveals a series of biological sacs filled with greenish slime)

Tirmek - Here keep the healing evened out.

Volrath - *toss*

Other kids - Ewwwww :yuck:
Kaizer_Ryu

12-05-06, 02:53 AM		Terra: *stands shakily* I think it's about time we left.

Elina: *runs over* Are you sure you should be standing yet?

Terra: No. But I'd much rather leave sooner than later so I don't give into the urge to turn this place into a smoking crater.

Miko: :plotting:

Tirmek: *whack* No! Bad Blackguard! No encouraging the use of WMD's!

Miko: :mad:

Sarah: What ever happened to Maenya and Teraza? We took out most of Maenya's forces, but not her...

Maenya: And you never will.

She stands over the remains of her sisters body behind the group. Beside herself with fury at the death of her sister, she looks prepared to try and murder each and every one of them.

Terra: Enough is enough, Maenya. We just want to leave. The machine is gone and Katra is dead. You and Teraza will have a hard enough time keeping Droaam together as it is. Bury your sister and move on.

The group moves to leave as Maenya clenches her fists. Her eyes flare red as she flies into a rage and charges. The Annis's claws strike out into Terra's back, but pass straight through. She stands shocked for a moment with her arm halfway through Terra, then tries to pull back. Unfortunately, she finds her arm in a vice like grip, unable to extract it as wisps of shadows eminate from the point of contact.

Maenya: Let go of me, witch!

Terra: *sadly* Katra's life was enough. I wanted to leave you alive so you could keep this country from falling apart. Let's just hope Teraza can do it alone...

A crunching noise is heard as Maenya is pulled a little closer to Terra. She tries to pull away again, but still cannot extricate herself. Another crunch, and she is closer. The noises quicken, till she is in a state of panic. In one swift motion, Maenya is sucked into Terra's body. For a few moments, Terra's body can be seen distending as Maenya tries to escape, but the struggles soon stop.

Sarah: Wh...what are you doing?

Terra: I'm giving her a second chance...

After a few minutes, Terra reaches into her own body and pulls out a clump of shadow and holds it in her hands. The shadow slowly melts away to reveal a Wolf cub. The fur patterns match the scars Meanya had posessed.

Tirmek: What was the point of that? All you did was polymorph her...

Terra: Actually, this is her true form now. She has been reborn.

Kids: :OMG!

Volrath: *disappointed* You could have changed her into pretty much anything and you picked that?!

Terra: The more complex it is, the harder it is to get right. I just don't have the power right now to do anything better, even if I wanted to. *shakes her head* I don't like doing this. It can be extremely dangerous.

Teraza: *walking out* I guess this means I'm by myself, then...

Terra: *hands her the cub* Maenya is still here, albeit changed.

Teraza: I apologize for the ordeal my sister's hubris put you through. But do not think that this is the end. You have a long road ahead of you. Each and every one of you. But take hope. My visions are clouded and the future is uncertain...

Terra: Be well. No offense, but don't expect me to drop in again.

Teraza: *chuckles* None take- oh, gods.

As they exit the court, they witness a terrible sight. The city is ablaze, and the residents are in a panic. The temporary housing, refuse, and squatter camps have fueled the flames, blanketing most of the city in an inferno.

Sarah: Mom! Can't you do something?!

Terra: Maybe. *Quench*

The fire in front of them dies, but roars back to life quickly.

Terra: Crap! It's too intense for just that. Control Weather takes time. I can get a few Water elementals right now, but that's it.

Lilly: You get to work on getting us some rain. We can start getting as many victims out of the fires as possible.

Miko: *raised eyebrow* We?

Lilly: Yes, 'we'. How may Elementals can you give us?

Terra: Three is all I can control right now.

Lilly: Perfect. Sarah, Elina. You and Miko follow me, Tirmek, and Volrath with the elementals. Even with protection from the flames, we're gonna need backup. *Endure Elements* *Resist Energy (fire)*

Tirmek: Who died and made you leader?

Lilly: Rescuing civilians is my schtick.

Volrath: Civilians? You know the 'civilans' here are monsters, right?

Lilly: Oh, absolutely. But leaving them to die horribly in the fire goes against the Paladin code more than letting them live.

Tirmek: How did we get dragged into your moral conundrum?

Lilly: *leans in a whispers* I might be immune to fear, but I know I need help on this. Do you want to be the one left behind as I score points with the girls? :smirk: And don't forget Sarah's sudden fascination with the Blackguard...

Tirmek: ...fine.

The kids race off with the Water elementals as Terra begins casting Control Weather to summon a rainstorm.

OOC: Ok, that's it for tonight. Anyone want to contribute to the rescuing? I don't have anything big in mind, just filler till I can wrap this arc up completely.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-05-06, 08:54 AM		OOcat: Shouldn't you be commenting on Elina's jelousy?

Silver: You mean I need to? :confused:
*********
13: So apparently we didn't need to rule 2.

Bunny: Yeah.

13: I see you're back.

Bunny: I'm fine so long as more gods don't mess with Silver's projects.

13: Wonder if the entity will help with the rescuing.

Bunny: Only if it's funny.
**********
On a quiet street a rather useless door swings open………

A few streets away, members gnoll rescue squad are trapped by the burning buildings all around. Other team members howl in frustration as they try to break through the wall of flames, but to no avail. Bystanders looks on with sympathetic despair.

Suddenly there is a rythmic pound felt through the ground, as if a huge creature were running. The sound of splintering wood can be heard from the direction that the gnolls are believed trapped. People stand in confusion, and then fear as the sound gets closer.

Through the flames, like some insectile dragon, bursts a great reptilian creature with lanky limbs, a spiked shell on its back, two horns, and a jutting jaw. It carries the trapped gnolls under its arms, depositing them at the feet of their fellows before racing into more burning buildings.

Racing around a corner comes a wheeled contraption built from common junk somehow animated. Nozzles stick out in rows from the sides, spraying water at the buildings as they pass. At the front, driving, is a half-elf who is supernaturally able to avoid all obstancles suddenly littering the path of the vehicle. As it passes the group of bystanders three figures jump off. One, a minotaur strangly more intelligent than normal, named Erk, convinces the gnolls to let him direct the rescue operations. The rakshasa with non-reversed hands casts heat-protection spells, and the female ninja gives them equipment.

The rescues proceed much more smoothly and safely after that.

They would later become known as the E-Team.
Charles Phipps

12-05-06, 09:43 AM		OOC: One of my favorite spells from Slayers. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zj6ZZ4Fp2Is

Tirmek: Actually, haven't you killed anyone here? Even Maeyna whom you hit with your full on smite.

Lilly: :OMG!

Tirmek: That means you get no EXP at all!

Lilly: :censored:

Tirmek: Uh....Lilly.

*A darkness sweeps across the land*

Sarah: Uhh.....you do realize Lilly is an Arcane Paladin right Tirmek?

Tirmek: A what?

Sarah: He's a little min-maxer, they add their paladin levels to their wizard casting levels in exchange for lower hit points.

*Lilly glows*

Lilly: Darkness beyond twilight, Crimson Beyond Blood that Flows, buried in the stream of time is where your power grows....

*A glowing aura encircles him*

Lilly: I pledge myself to conquer all the foes who stand against the mighty gift bestowed in my unworthy hands

*a glowing fireball emerges in Lilly's hands that draws plasma out of the very air*

Lilly: DRAGONNNN SLAVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVE!

Terra: LILLY!

*A mighty monstrous creature emerges from the tower that is immediately visible as a great Skeletal dragon with glowing eyes*

*The resulting spell results in a massive detonation that immediately sweeps away the tower, smashes the ground underneath the kids, and then throws them back dozens of feet in what seems very reminscent of the Trinity testing*

*Everyone is covered in soot just beside a gigantic crater that is covered in glass*

Sarah: Lilly, what the hell was that?

Lilly: Oh that's the spell my mom taught me. It's what you get when you combine a Delayed Blast Fireball with the material component of the blood of a goddess.

The masses of Droam outside the tower: :surrender

Lilly: *ahem* Okay, perhaps I sort of ruined the whole peaceful transition of power thing. However, like a certain country in Breland, just because I'm grossly incompetent doesn't mean I'm not well intentioned.

King Steve: HELLO!

Lilly: besides, these hags had Dracoliches of Mass Destruction. However, I gladly now inform you that you are all FREE and NOW HAVE DEMOCRACY!

Monsters: :crazy:

Lilly: Unless, you want me to stay and enforce it with another spell.

Monsters: :bravo:

*Lilly bows and accepts the accolades accorded to him*

Lilly: Yes, it's all another days work for the glorious paladin champion of good.

Terra: :lop:

Lilly: Meep.

***

OOCharles: Sorry, but it just wouldn't be the Forgotten Freedom if it had ended otherwise.
Gladius_Lucix

12-05-06, 10:24 AM		OOGladius: I think we're all just glad that he doesn't know Gigaslave.

OOGladius pauses to consider something.

OOGladius: Lilly, can I get a scroll of that for an experiments? I want to see how big it gets hooked up to Weirsan. :devil:
Charles Phipps

12-05-06, 10:28 AM		Lilly: SURE!

*is WHAMMED from behind by Elina*

Lilly: My life is pain.
Chrys

12-05-06, 10:37 AM		OoAero: Arcane Paladin! what a pansy...

Chrys Shhhh you not even suposed to know about Lilly and the others yet.

OoAero But but... Grandpa was right mortal are so stupid. Do you think I could take mortal hunter PRC and still be Lawful Good?

Ducky Er... I don't think so.

Chrys You know I wouldn't call Lilly a Pansy... I mean Hells he could have brother named Pansy that is a spoony Healer
Charles Phipps

12-05-06, 10:46 AM		Pansy the Spoony Cleric: Hmmmmm?

Zelgadis: Amelia?

Pansy: Oh sorry, just had the weirdest feeling someone was talking about me.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-05-06, 11:03 AM		OOC: Well we know Caralot has the ability to make someone into a demon/golem/human. :D
rampant

12-05-06, 11:16 AM		A great slab of burning rubble hurtles down towards a group of young minotaurs.

Tirmek - Damned elementals are always too slow -rounds the corner- :eek: oh well

The young warrior dashes down the lane Leaping into the air over the minotaurs' heads.

Tirmek - Hee-yaaaaaa

The slab is blasted apart by the force of the strike the pieces still cut, slam and burn but fatalities have been avoided.

Minotaur youth - Thanks to you stranger we-

Tirmek (very singed) - OH crud these were my good robes, mom is gonna skin me alive.
rampant

12-05-06, 03:21 PM		Dorvos - :bigeyes:

Satnak - I'm sorry son. But I just don't have any lap left.

Serene - You're just gonna have to make do on the couch.

Dorvos - Hmmmmmm:mad:

Ketty - Yeah being eldest bites. Come here Aunt Ketty has room for you.

Lisa - How do I get out from under Fluffy?

Satnak - Never figured that out myself.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-05-06, 03:47 PM		OOcat: Is there some sort of stealth-pregnancy going on that I don't know about? :ahem:

Silver: :angelhide
rampant

12-05-06, 04:14 PM		OORampant - YOU GAVE ME AN AWARD FOR IT! Where's my superscope!?
--------------------------------------------------------

Dorvos - Grrrrrrrmmmmmm

Ketty - Get used to it kid.

Lisa - When the kids get here you're gonna have help even more.

The three are helping Satnak and Serene shop for supplies, Dorvos is stugling under a load of diapers, Lisa is toting a crib set, and Ketty is towing a staggering load of training gear Some of which is intended for Dorvos as well.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-05-06, 04:20 PM		OORampant - YOU GAVE ME AN AWARD FOR IT! Where's my superscope!?
13: Told you it's dense. :bored:

OOcat: :mad:

OOC: I have a really bad memory.

OOcat: Yes, yes you do. :P
Charles Phipps

12-05-06, 04:36 PM		Jaela Jarlot: So, we have agreed that there will be a formal transfer of powers between the Silver Flame and the Monarchy.

Queen Diani: Yes, I name Lisa as my heir.

Jaela Jarlot: Awkward but they have been immortalized in legend for defeating the armies of the enemy. However, the Church needs to heal the wounded and bury the dead than try to take more life. Your forgoing the Crown of Gallifar is a remarkable gesture though.

Queen Diani: There will never be another Last War. This is part of our compact.

Jaela Jarlot: Now there is one final matter.

Queen Diani: Yes, the Promisebreaker.

Jaela Jarlot: The Gold Dragon Aurec has informed us that there exists a single Chosen One of Evil so powerful that she will bring about the end of all creation. One whom will break the bonds on the Rajahs and free the evil into the world once more.

Queen Diani: The other nations have already issued their commands for her death. I have requested a joint letter be sent to Sir Gregory to have him kill this evil enemy.

Jaela Jarlot: The Cardinals as well. We do not yet know her identity but the Dragons will be assisting us in finding the Promise Breaker and slaying her.

Queen Diani: Yes, let us swear a divine geas. Death to the Chosen of the Shadow. She whom will destroy the world on her sixteenth birthday.
urial angel of death

12-05-06, 04:41 PM		Kerrith (current tiemline version) is attempting to contest him being the runner up to a most unkind reward.

Kerrith: Planar Binding!

A drop dead gorgeous* succubus appears in his summoning circle.

Kerrith: Oh ya!

Succubus: Hold on there big boy. *hands him a sheet of paper* This is a list your mother sent to the outer planes, of things I'm not allowed to do for you.

Kerrith: Oh, this gets rid of all point to summoning a succubus.

Succubus: Not just succubi, erinyes, maraliths, devas, nymphs, dryads, lilithus, unique outsiders, lillends, angels, and incubui aren't allowed to either.

Kerrith: Incubui :confused:

Succubus: She said she wasn't sure about you.

Kerrith: :weep:

OOC: * You know how all girls in fantasy stories look.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-05-06, 05:07 PM		Silver: Oh come on! There goes any "bad-boy drow" fun!

Bunny: He was named runner up for least likely to get a girl, you couldn't have been trying very hard. :bored:

OOC: Note: Jaela Jarlot is the name generally used to refer the Alt-Jaela from the timeline without the Silver Flame. As such she wouldn't be having much to do with political power in Thrane. You're thinking of Sakura Jaela (who is, technically, Jaela Jarlot, but it keeps things simple if we use names consistantly).
Charles Phipps

12-05-06, 05:16 PM		OOCharles: Wow, that's tragic when you get your own names wrong.

Sakura: Well I wouldn't screw up this bad. I have Jaela cover for me when I'm having sex with my Alt-Bishounen boyfriend Lilly.

Parn: Hey!

Sakura: Quiet you! No speaking, just look like Cloud.
rampant

12-05-06, 05:45 PM		OORampant - Wait if she wants parn to look like cloud and Jarlot is old cloud... ewwwwwwwww

OOSilvercat - How many times must we tell you.

OOChrys - Stop thinking about things so hard.

OOCharles - (dope-slaps OORampant)
---------------------------------------------------------------------

Dorvos - HMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmm

Ketty - Perfectly fair.

Serene - Wasn't going to ask.

Lisa - Yeah that would be too much.

Satnak - That would be mean.

Terrek - No we don't expect you to change diapers.

Rashour - AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO DOESN'T KNOW WHAT HE'S SAYING?
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-05-06, 05:55 PM		Rashour - AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO DOESN'T KNOW WHAT HE'S SAYING?
13: Yes. :devil:
Charles Phipps

12-05-06, 06:08 PM		The Group Returns to the Forgotten Freedom

Sarah: Well, all our efforts to avoid the destruction of Droam were for naught.

Elina: True, I feel like a real part of the crew now.

Sarah: I'd feel more guilty were not for the fact they'd all been trying to kill us just seconds before.

Elina: Not to mention torture mom and try to corrupt me. I wonder if this makes me Neutral.

Sarah: Well better than Lilly's version of Lawful Good.

Tirmek: I cannot accept he's more powerful than me.

Lilly: Does it make that much of a difference?

Tirmek: YES.

Miko: Ah, the Forgotten Freedom, source of all evil in the Four Nations.

Lilly: Actually it's 3 and a half now.

Miko: :blink:

Michael: Hey kids!

Miko: Hey Michael. I'm your long lost daughter.

Michael: Ah crap! Another one! Alright *reaches into his pocket* How much do you want?

Lilly: Oddly, this is exactly how I pictured their first meeting would go.

Miko: Gimme your Book of Vile Darkness and we'll call it even.

*Michael hands over the coffee stained copy which he'd used to prop up a sofa*

Miko: Score! Chapters by Anne Rice and Stephen King!

Michael: You're too young to read the Laurel K. Hamilton ones.

Miko: **** you.

Michael: Ah, just like the others...

Miko: I'll be back in a bit my love. Then we can talk about my having you stuffed into a helm of opposite alignment before we're married by one of the Dark Lords.

Lilly: :Shudder:
urial angel of death

12-05-06, 06:25 PM		Succubus: Would you like me to do something master.

Kerrith: Well you could give Tirmek some negative levels... wait could you teach me what girls like.

Succubus: Well I could try, but my race was made to be easy.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-05-06, 07:18 PM		From the Producer, Director, and Writer who brought you "Forgotten Freedom: The Movie", and "A Spoony Bard's Tale", comes the next saga in the Jarlot family:

Bad, Bad Paladin (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e54wnGo1Fck&NR)

(DVD Special features include Commentary, and by the Writer as well)
Charles Phipps

12-05-06, 07:19 PM		Marish: I want to give my entity a piece of my mind.

Can you afford it?

Marish: Hush. I'm so mad! I haven't worked in so long that I had to get a second job!

Doing what?

***
Las Vegas

Marish whispered to the white tiger beside her "Listen, all we need is to take the blonde one together and we can bust out of here."

Siegfried cracks the whip over Marish's head
Charles Phipps

12-05-06, 07:33 PM		From the Producer, Director, and Writer who brought you "Forgotten Freedom: The Movie", and "A Spoony Bard's Tale", comes the next saga in the Jarlot family:

Bad, Bad Paladin (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e54wnGo1Fck&NR)

(DVD Special features include Commentary, and by the Writer as well)

Lilly: Ah yes, my true self revealed.

ELina: You wish.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-05-06, 07:34 PM		Lisa: *GIGANTIC HUG* Oh, I'm so happy you're all right!

Sarah & Elina: *gack* Can't *gasp* breathe...

Lisa: :embarrass Oh, sorry. Where's Terra?

Sarah: Mom went through quite a lot.

Lisa: So I heard.

Elina: She said she was gonna rest for a while. How she got us home is beyond me.

Lisa: I'm gonna go check on her.

Sarah: Momma...before you go...

Elina: We know about Mom.

Lisa: :confused: Know what?

Sarah: Momma...are we demi-gods? Is that what the seals are holding back?

Lisa: :mymy: ...how did you find out?

Sarah: Sora Katra was busy gloating and told Lilly all about it.

Lisa: *sigh* I guess there's no point in hiding it. To answer your question, no. You both were concieved before she took that form. Even if it was afterwards, I don't think she'd have allowed it.

Elina: Why not?

Lisa: It was her decision to enter that cage. She would not allow her own children to face the same fate by anything other than choice.

Sarah: ...cage?

Lisa: She is the Keeper of Shadowmatter (OOC: Thanks to cypher for the name). Her responsibilities as such bind her now and forever.

Elina: Then why did Mom do it?

Lisa: I asked her the same question years ago. She told me: "I would rather be in a cage of my own making than one of anothers design."

Sarah: Sounds like something Mom'd say. ...one more thing before you go. Why didn't you tell us?

Lisa: We agreed not to tell you till you were older so you wouldn't feel any more pressure than you already might. The last thing we wanted was to heap another legacy on you. You decide what you want to be. Even if you wanted to be a Spoony Bard, so long as you were happy, we wouldn't argue.

OOC: Ok, just to make sure we're all on the same page, when I said Terra is a goddess, I did not, I repeat, DID NOT mean it in the traditional D&D sense. She is actually much closer to Silver, Bunny, and 13 in that she embodies a force of the world. She has been one since she returned from the honeymoon, and is no stronger because of this recent encounter. She is her own avatar, and her true goddess form is bound due to the Progeniter Dragon's edict that no gods shall be manfest. Part 2 coming soon.
rampant

12-05-06, 08:29 PM		Ketty - TIRMEK! WHAT HAPPENED TO THOSE ROBES!

Tirmek - You see there was this fire and-

Ketty - NO EXCUSES GET HOME AND CLEAN YOURSELF UP AND GET TO WORK YOU'RE GONNA PAY FOR THAT BEFORE THE ENDOF THE MONTH!

Ketty picks up Tirmek by the nape of his neck, triggering his reflex to curl up like a kitten.

Mittens - Mew (busted)

Tirmek - *waves bye-bye*

Sarah - See you

Elina - Later
urial angel of death

12-05-06, 08:40 PM		Sarah: Momma...are we demi-gods? Is that what the seals are holding back?


OOUrial: :twitch: Children of dieties are called quasi-dieties.

Kagat: Stop your rules lawyering.


Lisa: She is the Keeper of Shadowmatter (OOC: Thanks to cypher for the name). Her responsibilities as such bind her now and forever.


Don't you mean dark*matter(tm). Oh wait one out of every thousand people aren't devilworshippers. To bad, save for that plot hole I really liked that campaign setting.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-05-06, 09:06 PM		Kagat:
OOC: It's Naggat (Nag-at, anti-pun) just for future reference. We all make mistakes: me about names of elder gods, you about the names of inevitables.
DungeonJman

12-05-06, 09:08 PM		*Nobby looks around on deck, before walking on*

Nobby:Alright, since things have finally calmed down, i think i'll be able to recite one of the most powerful secrets of the universe. Now before i begin, i must warn you: anyone on this ship who is reliant on having a specific alignment (yes, i learned about breaking the 4th wall from Jarlot the second, so don't question it), should make sure to find a way to stop themselves from listening right now. I'm dead serious.

OOC: I have nowhere near enough time to write the whole thing out right now, and also i need to give the others a chance to cover their ears.

Nobby: No you don't, it's all about the time factor.

OODungeonJ: Be quiet!!!
Kaizer_Ryu

12-05-06, 09:21 PM		OORampant - Wait if she wants parn to look like cloud and Jarlot is old cloud... ewwwwwwwww
OOC: And this is more disturbing than the rest of the thread how? :D

IC:

Terra lies still, deep in meditative sleep as Lisa sits next to her on the bed, watching.

Lisa: *sigh* I know I probably should be mad...but I'm not. I know what it's like when someone you trust violates that bond. You did what you thought was right...

She slides over and lies next to Terra, listening to her almost imperceptible breathing. It struck her as odd how Terra didn't truly need to do so many things anymore; eat, sleep, breathe...yet she did anyway. She was immortal, a goddess actually, yet she chose to live as a mortal. Terra acted like she didn't mind, but Lisa knew she missed the relative simplicity her life had before all this came to light.

Lisa smiled at her next thought. Terra could almost literally go anywhere she wished, visit exotic locations at a whim, yet she was content to merely stay in Lisa's arms for hours on end. Lisa gazed lovingly at the beautiful paradox lying next to her as she placed her head on Terra's chest.

*much later*

Lisa: ...hmmm? Huh...I guess I dozed off...

Terra: I don't mind...

Lisa: Oh, you're awake! Feeling better?

Terra: Physically, yes. Emotionally...not so much.

Lisa: What's the matter?

*quick rundown of Katra's monologue*

Lisa: ...I can see why you're upset. But...you already knew you were planned. Same with me.

Terra: It just burns me that we weren't just part of some isolated incidents. This is a larger plan. The two of us are part of it, our relationship is part of it, the girls are part of it...and I didn't see it coming.

Lisa: So?

Terra: Hm?

Lisa: From what you said, our relationship was never planned to be this way. We are together not because of some plan, but because we want to be. We have two wonderful daughters because we chose to have them. Besides, it's just not possible for fate to create sex so amazing without our consent. ;)

Terra giggles at this, finally cracking a smile, much to Lisa's relief.

Terra: So you forgive me?

Lisa: For what?

Terra: Putting our daughters in such danger. Risking Elina's sanity. Nearly causing the end of the world. How abou-

Lisa puts her finger over Terra's lips.

Lisa: That was Sora Katra's fault. You had no way of knowing she would do something so incredibly foolish. And even a goddess is allowed to miss things when working against other, older gods.

Terra: I know... But I still feel responsible for it.

Lisa: You really want to do something to make it up to me?

Terra: Absolutely. Name it.

Lisa: :plotting: :devil:

Terra: :eek: Well...guess I'd better seal off the room...

OOC: About the proper term for the spawn of dieties... :P They're ten.
rampant

12-05-06, 09:57 PM		Lisa - I think we wore out the bed:D

Terra - So what did we miss?

Lisa - Dorvos is about 5 now and there's two more on the way.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Satnak - Ok I can't move right any more *telekinesis*

Serene - (carried by an astral construct) so how did you pass the time?

Satnak - Comics lots of comics...and video games.

Serene - Dorvos, honey get the multi-taps please.
urial angel of death

12-05-06, 10:19 PM		OOC: It's Naggat (Nag-at, anti-pun) just for future reference. We all make mistakes: me about names of elder gods, you about the names of inevitables.

Sorry I always picture one of Azalin's secret police so I must have mixed the spelling.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-05-06, 10:38 PM		Terra: Honey, I think we may be commiting a crime against the universe here.

Lisa: How so?

Terra: When we're so good we break a bed (twice) that has springs triple reinforced against repeated stress, an adamantine frame, and more than a few enchantments to guard against collapse...that's got to violate some kind of cosmic law.

Lisa: ;) I'm pretty sure the Paladin's Code allows this one.

Squirrel: Squeaken.

Lisa: Hm? *takes the letter* Thanks. *hands him a satchel of birdseed*

Squirrel: :w00t: *bows and heads off*

Terra: ;) Heavy tipper.

Lisa: He waited patiently till we were ready. I figure that's got to be worth something. *begins reading* ...oh, dear.

Terra: What? Is it bad?

Lisa: See for yourself.

Terra: *reading* ...your joking.

Lisa: Nope. According to Mom, we're going to be officially crowned as the next Queens of Thrane once the official proceedings are finished. And not just as figureheads.

Terra is busy trying not to laugh.

Lisa: What?

Terra: Don't you realize the beautiful irony here?

Lisa: That Outsiders will be both one Queen and two Princesses, with one of them being a Lycanthrope on top if it? How could I not? I just hope no one freaks out about it.

Terra: It'd have to be handled delicately, that's for sure. Maybe their being both Neutral and Native Outsiders will soften the shock.

Lisa: You're taking this surprisingly well.

Terra: Hon, I knew when I married you this was a possibility. How about you? You never liked the idea of being a Princess, now you're going to be made Queen.

Lisa: I'm still not terribly keen on it, but as Queen, I can enact some real change. I thought about saying no, but I guess I learned something else from you.

Terra: Yeah?

Lisa: This is my responibility, and walking away from it could cause a lot of harm. I will decide how and under what terms I enter this cage.

-----

Gregory: Promisebreaker, huh? I wonder how I'm supposed to find this devil. Perhaps Miss Lisa can help me in my quest...

DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNN!!!!!!

Gregory: Stop breaking into people's rooms just to get attention! *SMITE*

Devon: :eek: :gah:
Charles Phipps

12-05-06, 10:43 PM		Rose: You know what bugs the hell out of me?

Achika: The fact that I'm Karrnath's daughter and an evil vampire is ruling my Kingdom?

Zella: DAMNIT! DON'T STEAL MY PRINCESS STICKHE!

Rose: I'm a video game hero. Achika was my girlfriend for Gameboy. You're the main console girl.

Zella: :blink:

Achika: :blink:

Zella: Does that make any sense to ANYONE?

Rose: No, it's DANIEL CRAIG AS JAMES BOND!

Lilly: He's blonde like me! I can at last grow up to be like Bond!

Rose: The nightmare of this is horrible.

Jarlot: I'm the Sean Connery James Bond.

Admiral Jarlot: I'm the Crotchety, Old, Slightly Crazy Roger Moore Bond.

Michael: I'm Dalton. I never get the girl and never seem to enjoy doing good.

Rose: That means I'm Brosnen?

Jarlot: Sorry...no.

Rose: Not....LAZENBY!

Jarlot: Yes, the Spoony Bond.
rampant

12-05-06, 11:18 PM		Tirmek - That was unpleasant. I don't know what part of a Diregnoll that was, and don't want to, it was still moving. I hate doing the laundry, when mom gets back from a gig.

Sarah - Gag chores :yuck:

Elina - You two:rolleyes:

Tirmek - The worst part is, I go into the medics to treat the bite wounds-

Elina - I thought you said you didn't know wich part it was.

Tirmek - When I said every part of a Diregnoll has teeth and fangs, I meant every part. Anyway turns out I need glasses now.

Sarah - Neerrd!

Elina - Oh come on you have massive scarring on your back.

Sarah - Its not that big.

Elina - A patch behind your ear that just wont ever grow fur straight again.

Sarah - Hardly noticable.

Elina - Lets not forget your right arm is still in bandages.

Sarah - ...Why's everyone looking at me, by the way you might wanna get those changed soon.

Elina - And you're worried about glasses!

Tirmek - How am I gonna get them to stay on in a fight?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Sitting in front of a multi-faced veiwer system.

Serene - Cover me I'm going in!

Satnak - Use the flack cannons on those planes.

Dorvos - Hmmmmmmmmm

Satnak - I know you're low on flack ammo mix it in to a normal anti-air clip.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-05-06, 11:36 PM		Elina: Well, you could always talk to Liam. He might be able to make something to help with that.

Sarah: He gave me this nifty broach. Now, when I'm finally able to transform, I dont ruin my clothes and can keep my dignity when I go back. And it goes with my eyes! :D

Elina: With all the crazy stuff he makes based off the absurdity inherent in the FF, I don't think it'd be too hard to make some frames with reversed probabilities.

Tirmek: Hmmmm...frames that are actually more likely to fall off when they shouldn't, and will almost never fall off in the heat of battle... I'd need an extra pair for everyday use, but that could work...

OOC: Meh. Just a suggestion. Take it if you want.
rampant

12-06-06, 01:29 AM		Tirmek - ahem

Liam - Hello Tirmek.

Tirmek - How much to fix up some glasses that will stay on, and keep up with my shapeshifting.

Liam - Shapeshifting? how extreme are we talking here?

Tirmek - Think Changeling.

Liam - Not too much just 2000 gp.

Tirmek - geh!
rampant

12-06-06, 02:06 AM		Tirmek - The frames are either green or brown any other color is unacceptable.

Liam - Of course.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Dorvos - Hmmmmmmmm

Satnak - Gotcha!

Bang!

Dorvos - :confused:

Satnak - Razza fragging sniper

Serene - :D
Gladius_Lucix

12-06-06, 08:01 AM		Liam: So, why are we doing this again?

OOGladius: Because, for the entities, it's almost Christmas, generally celebrated by giving gifts to friends and loved ones.

Liam: Are any of the other entities doing this?

OOGladius: Not as far as I know.

Liam: But, if I understand correctly, Christmas is still a few weeks away for you.

OOGladius: True, but I won't be able to come around here then.

Liam: And, one more time, WHY do I have to dress like this?!?

OOGladius is dressed in a classic Santa costume. Liam is wearing the stereotypical "Santa's Elf" outfit. The Swarm follows behind, silently laughing at Liam, in the shape of a sleigh. It's carrying few large bulging bags.

OOGladius: Because you aren't jolly enough to be Santa, and I'm not short enough to be one of Santa's elves.

Liam: I mean... Nevermind. Let's just get this over with.

----

Their first stop is Kithle's quarters.

Kithle: What do you want? I'm a little busy.

A few seconds after seeing the pair, Kithle's brain finally processes that there's something strange about the pair.

Kithle: :uh-huh: Why are you dressed like that?

Liam: Don't ask. Grab Kithle's present, Swarm.

Swarm: Coming right out, boss.

A smallish package, wrapped in brightly colored paper and ribbon, with a matching bow on top. When Kithle opens it, he finds a polishing kit.

Liam: For The Plaque, if it wasn't obvious.

Kithle: Thanks. I was running a little low on supplies.

OOGladius: Merry Christmas!

----

Liam: :mad: WHY are we HERE?

OOGladius: Because Christmas is also a time of peace and goodwill. That includes forgiveness.

OOGladius knocks on the door. Some swearing, a small crash, and general rustling of pages can be heard from the other side of the door.

Ketler: Just a minute!

A minute later...

OOGladius: (staring at his watch) 58 ... 59 ... 60.

The door opens.

Ketler: Wha- GAH! :gah:

Liam is giving Ketler a glare that, while not as deadly as Satnak's, is full of hate. OOGladius hands Ketler a present.

OOGladius: I brought it from my world. It's a bunch of those games that you like so much. Merry Christmas.

Ketler: Really?

OOGladius: Yep. They aren't translated though. Sorry.

Ketler: NOOOOOOOoooo....

As Liam and OOGladius walk on to the next stop...

Liam: I know there was a reason I tolerated you.

----

Liam: Terra, Lisa, are you there? I have something for you.

Terra: Yeah. We'll be right out.

A short bit later, the door opens.

OOGladius: Merry Christmas!

At the sight of Liam and OOGladius, Terra and Lisa are just barely holding back laughter.

Lisa: Um.. *heh* Same to you. What is it?

Liam: Just a sec. Where are the girls?

Terra: They're out training *snicker* with Tirmek and Lilly.

Liam: Alright. We'll find them later.

Terra: What is going on?

OOGladius: Presents! Swarm, fish 'em out.

Swarm: On it.

The Swarm hands the two ladies three boxes, two small and one big.

Liam: Open the big one first.

Inside is a contraption of some sort. There are a few knobs, and a depression that could fit an image crystal.

Liam: Top of the line Image Crystal Encrypter. Insert the image crystal and set the password, and it's perfectly protected. Can't be viewed unless the password is given. Protect Sara and Elina from the pictures, and protect the pictures from Ketler.

Terra: Thank you.

Terra puts the encrypter inside the door as Lisa starts to unwrap the other two. Inside, she finds...

Lisa: Snowglobes. :globe: :globe:

OOGladius: Yup. Flamekeep and Oalian. There's a button on the Flamekeep one that turns on a little light in about the same place as the Flame is in the real thing.

Lisa: Thanks...

OOGladius: We'll give the girls their presents when we run into them. Bye.

As Liam and OOGladius turn to walk away, the bells on the toes of Liam's shoes jingle, reminding Terra and Lisa how absurd the pair looks. Unable to restrain themselves any more, the two break into gales of laughter.

Liam: (under his breath) I will get you for this, OOGladius.

OOGladius: What'd you say, Liam?

Liam: Nothing. Let's just get this overwith.

----

Ketler: What, since when did I ever care about what the story was on those games?

----
OOC: More to come later. Merry Christmases, everyone!
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-06-06, 08:19 AM		A letter gets slipped under Terra and Lisa's door.

Terra: What now?

She reaches down to pick it up. It's a business-type envelope, the kind with a cellophane window on the front showing Terra's address. She opens it.

Dear Miss Terra Branford,

You are hereby invited to join the Forgotten Freedom Gods' Club. Please talk to Silver—who is likely standing right next to you on account of what you've been doing for the last several hours—reguarding your membership.

Signed,
FX demon
Club President

Terra: FX demon is club president?

Silver: Yeah, it's weird, but apparently it gets prayers from actual gods. Just in case you're wondering, Terrek never attends because he's too high-and-mighty.
*********
13 follows OOGladius and Liam.

13: Walking through the haaaaaaaaaalls,
in some really silly shooooooooooes,
losing all respeeeeeeeect,
you'll never live this dowwwwwwwwwn!………
*********
Bunny: I don't care which one is which, go out there and kill some bad guys!

Silver: Do you have any interest in another beserker outsider/lycanthrope?

Bunny: This is a retorical question? :bored:

13: Tirmek needs glasses. Now I can subject him to the need to clean them! :evillaugh
Charles Phipps

12-06-06, 08:22 AM		OOC: This has nothing to do with the thread but damn if this isn't funny. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vgYhLIThTvk
*Warning* Harsh language ;-)
Gladius_Lucix

12-06-06, 08:27 AM		OOGladius: Oh, 13. Nice to see you. We've got something for you, too, since you're here.

13: Huh?

OOGladius: Swarm, if you would be so kind.

Swarm: Here you go.

This package is decorated like the rest, but is cylindrical instead of box shaped. Opening it, 13 finds...

OOGladius: Yup! Five rolls of enhanced industrial strength red duct tape. I figure since bureaucracy is part of your portfolio, you might need a little more red tape.

13: Heh. Thanks.

Liam: Does this mean you'll leave me alone?

13: :devil: Not a chance.
Charles Phipps

12-06-06, 09:00 AM		*Sounds of Marish crying can be heard*

Ketler: OH Gods...

Terra: Yes?

Ketler: I'm sorry, you seem to believe I'm going to feed your delusion that you're a deity as opposed to some loopy tentacle thingy.

Terra: What?

Ketler: According to the Pretty Blonde robot Lady, there is only One God. The God of the Cylons. *hugs his copy of BSG*

Terra: *ahem* Anyway, what is going on with Marish? Did someone die?

Ketler: Yeah.

Terra: Oh no! Who?

Ketler: She's at the death scene in The Lion King.

Marish: MUFFFASSAAAAAAAAAAA!
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-06-06, 09:24 AM		OOC: :mymy: I nominate Charles for craziest E.B.N.E. unless Crystalforged can come up with something better.
Chrys

12-06-06, 09:37 AM		D'Ducky: Oh that is so not fair... I'm going to have to crash there little god-party until they invite be to join...

Aero then you'll forget why you want to join and then go to do something Else... like build a light rail for the ship?

D'Ducky Damn stright! How did Chrys get his Oo powers back?

Aero Oh he said he had to do some research...

OoChrys it has nothing to do with porn! I'm trying to decide if I want to buy that new warhammer game...

Aero right...

D'Ducky ohh Does that mean we are going to fight Giant Rats soon?

OoChrys or an army of elves.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-06-06, 09:45 AM		Terra: I still don't get why I can't be both a goddess and a 'loopy' tentacle thing. You seem to enjoy it.

Lisa: :smirk: Oh, just a little.

Terra: I wonder how long it will be till someone points out the conundrum that you're sleeping with a goddess you don't worship.

Lisa: That's not entirely true. I give you plenty of "lip service". :devil:

Terra: :embarrass That...was surprisingly dirty.

Lisa: :D

OOC: As a side note, Terra isn't going to flaunt her goddess stature. She's not terribly interested in worshippers. They tend to go militant and misinterpret the words of their deity in order to justify any number of things she/he/it obviously doesn't approve of. :P

No miracles for you.
Charles Phipps

12-06-06, 09:58 AM		Lilly: Damnit, I was going to be a Dual Chosen of Terra/Dol Arrah.

Elina: What? You don't even LIKE mom.

Lilly: Who cares! Think of the TEMPLATES!

Elina: Oh great.

Lilly: As Chosen of Dol Arrah I get maximized Constitution and Smiting while simulatenously also getting immortality, Honor Charge, and Sovereign Host Fire.

Elina: Uh....huh.

Lilly: Plus, I also get Unbreakable Alignment. This allows me to never shift to an Evil or Neutral Alignment.

Elina: GAH! What about free will?

Lilly: Oh, I still have it. It's just every time I'm about to switch alignment, some horrible curse or geas afflicts me instead.

Elina: Uh...huh.

Lilly: I'm write now forbidden to eat garlic or shake hands with left handed people. Plus, I must recover the mighty Gem of Cytorrak.

Elina: Oh brother.

*She steps out of the way just as an anvil nearly hits her*

Miko: Darnit!

Elina: MIKO! Are you trying to kill me to get Lilly?

Miko: Yes.

Elina:....touche.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-06-06, 10:00 AM		OOC: As a side note, Terra isn't going to flaunt her goddess stature. She's not terribly interested in worshippers. They tend to go militant and misinterpret the words of their deity in order to justify any number of things she/he/it obviously doesn't approve of. :P

No miracles for you.
13: Invitation still stands. It's not like Word Being bothers to really be a god.

Bunny: None of us, either. :bored:

Silver: Speak for yourself. :D

13: Say, wait a minute…………does this mean we have to invite the teletubbies?

OOcat: Just because some crazy half-baked goods worship them doesn't make them gods. I'd say demon lords.
*********
Lilly: Oh, I still have it. It's just every time I'm about to switch alignment, some horrible curse or geas afflicts me instead.
13: Oh it's baaaaaaaaaaad luck to be youuuuuuuuuuuuuuu…………… :devil:
Charles Phipps

12-06-06, 10:08 AM		Lilly: I guess there's only one solution.

Elina: To what?

Lilly: In order to have people take me seriously, I'm going to drink this potion of pure undistilled cool.

Elina: Uh....Lilly. I'm not so sure....

*Lilly gulps down the entire thing*

Ketler: NO YOU FOOL! IT'S MEANT TO BE TAKEN BY TEASPOONS!

*A horrible transformation overtakes Lilly as he transforms into a dark and somber figure with a heavy black coat, black shades, and black hat*

Grim Von Darkshadow: Yes, I am now Grim Von Darkshadow and I wield two wands called hurt and pain as I fight the shadowy forces of evil for my own ambigious reasons.

Ketler: OH NO!

Elina: This would be alot cooler if he wasn't still eleven.

Grim: Now I'm going to shoot out my triple wands from my knuckles...

*SHRINKKKKKK*

Wolverine: *In a Thick Canadian Accent* COPYRIGHT INFRINGMENT EH! You keep doing that aboot and you're going to get slapped with a lawsuit dontcha know!

Grim: and go fight some vampire space Biatches ruled by Dread Lords of Chaos Pimps. Yes, to take it to the Max.
rampant

12-06-06, 11:19 AM		Tirmek - Thats enough. *Slaps Lily up the head*

Lily - OW dammit Tirmek you negated my potion.

Sarah - Glad thats over.

Tirmek - Ok Back to business.

Sarah - You're going down fuzz-breath.

Tirmek - Bring it wolfie.

:duel:
Charles Phipps

12-06-06, 11:52 AM		Lilly: Oh fine, I guess I'll have to do it the old fashioned way.

*Goes to get a Chainsaw grafted to his warforged graft arms and other attachments*
rampant

12-06-06, 12:05 PM		Elina - Bored ... Hey Miko! How about a match?

Miko - (i.h.h. I can make it look like a training accident) Hiyaaaaaah

:duel:

Elina - ... well this is less than stelllar

Miko - How did you do that thing with the wind and the blades? And the fire with the chains, and..and...

Elina - Maybe if I could get you and Lily to fight me this might be more fair? This is just sad.

Miko - grrrrrrr
Norr

12-06-06, 12:43 PM		Tirmek - The frames are either green or brown any other color is unacceptable.

*As Tirmek leave Liams quarters*

Squirrel Thing - glasses eh? I remember Neckie using those. Gave 'im hell. :D

Tirmek - You know, on a casual glance you bear a stunning resemblance to roadkill.

Squirrel Thing - :rolleyes: Well I wasn't actually here to chide you. If I may make a suggestion for your problem?

Tirmek - *Call warhammer* Shoot.

Squirrel Thing - *sweatdrop* Lenses. Unless you go all out Steve Urkel, your field of vision wont be worth a d*mn. Trust me on this.

Tirmek - *suspicious* Why are you telling me this?

Squirrel Thing - I was in Droaam the other day. Betting.

Tirmek - Oh. *Dismiss warhammer* Fair enough. *walks away*

13 - :headexplo What'd you do that for?

Squirrel Thing - Have you ever tried putting lenses into your eyes? Every day? *turns and leaves*

13 - :confused: ... :lightbulb ... :devil: I think my visit to Droaam had an unexpected side-effect :D

OOC: If you didn't guess, ST made a bad bet. Assume Tirmek rolled a natural 1 on his sense motive check. Also, the lens thing is just a suggestion. Either way, 13 wins.
Charles Phipps

12-06-06, 02:00 PM		Miko: Well I suppose I should just do what my brother does.

Elina: You have a brother?

Xellos: Hello!

Elina: GAH!

Xellos: Remember Miko, call upon the powers of Darkness but always remember to have a sacrifice.

Miko: Good point brother.

*Kicks over Redshirt*

*Powers up Dragonbalz style*
Chrys

12-06-06, 02:16 PM		Aero * who for some reason now looks like a Wood Elf * Hell-o I'm Aero. Why are you girls fighting?

Miko I'm trying to kill her so I can get at the cute Paladin boy... I mean we are just sparing.

Elina Who are you any way?

Aero Oh I'm D'Ducky's daughter, I'm a Paladin to your know. I don't really do the whole smiting thing though

Miko Great another one I have to deal with!

Aero What? Why would I be after a 11 year old boy.
Charles Phipps

12-06-06, 03:14 PM		Lilly: Because of my EXP!

Miko: YES! LOOK AT THE LEVELS ON HIM!
rampant

12-06-06, 04:00 PM		Maladren - How did I get roped into this?

Cole - Come on Play hide an'seek

Lady - No want play Tag

Dorvos - Hmmmmm

Shroedigger - Maladren Dorvos said a bad word

Rashour - How can you tell?

A.W.L. - I found this funny pink wand.
-bzzt-

Chibi Aero - Somebody dies for this.
Chrys

12-06-06, 04:02 PM		Aero Bah, I spent more level in my racial buy then he has in total... plus who really cares about that? In the grand scheme of thinks he is just a little boy who is over compensating.

Miko But Look at the size of his sword!

Aero So I can smite people with my butt... I also don't hang out with a unicorn. :cool:

OoChrys er... thats because you only a 3rd level paladin.

Aero Shhh Don't confuse him with the facts!

****
Chibi-Aero Now I can Take over the world with Cuteness!

OoChrys I think some all ready tryied that... plus your Lawful GOOD you can't take over the world.

Chibi-Aero Like Hells I can't!

Lilly I'm starting to like the way she thinks
Charles Phipps

12-06-06, 04:14 PM		Jarlot: Hey, I *DO RULE* the world and I'm Chaotic Good.

Ketler: You're Chaotic Something.

Jarlot: Quiet or in the Shark Tank you go!
urial angel of death

12-06-06, 05:35 PM		Sometime in the far off future.

Reincarnations of Terra and Satnak are fighting in what appears to be the grand canyon. Both appear to be wielding ancient swords. After an amazing sword-fight that puts the real Highlander movie to shame Terra decapitates Satnak. Blue energy flows from Satnak into Terra.

Terra: There can only be one!

OOC: I will be doing somemore stuff with the far off future including a Jurassic Park spoof. Anyone interested in helping PM me.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-06-06, 06:47 PM		OOC: I will be doing somemore stuff with the far off future including a Jurassic Park spoof. Anyone interested in helping PM me.
OOC: I may do more "Way, way, waywaywaywaywaywaywaywaywaywaywaywaywayw aywaywayway back when………", concentrating on the Ice Age spoof I was going to do.
Lord Kale Fangblade

12-06-06, 06:51 PM		OOC: and if you wondered why Sithis didnt go to droaam.

theres a room, with in the centre a coffin. from the coffins dark and comfy confines can be heard a muffled voice. a hand bangs on the coffins lid.

Sithis: By the Six, Let me out of here!

its only then that the huge rock thats been placed on the lid is apparent. as well as figure leaning on the rock.

OOfangblade: not just yet.

Sithis: why the **** have you trapped me in here! and why cant i just gaseous form and escape.

OOfangblade: sorry, but i cant let you go to droaam and have a huge super dragonballz style fight.

Sithis: Oh? and why not?

OOfangblade: *removes a letter from his pocket* because, Dramadar cut my SFX budget. he's left me with praticaly nothing. i cant AFFORD to let you go to droaam.

Sithis: *sigh* so what special affects have you got?

OOfangblade: i got that cheesy magic dust from the first DND movie. A few Cloud of smoke effects , a cartoony lightning bolt and a small ball of fire.

Sithis:..... i thought you where all powerful here. so how the hell can Dramadar affect you?

OOfangblade: simple. he petitioned to some "Higher Powers" whom then by general consensus decided that too much of my budget was going into special affects.

Sithis: wait... what about that huge stash of special affects you where saving for my final showdown?

OOfangblade: :shifty: what stockpile? i didnt make a huge stockpile of rediculously expensive and cool special effects.

Sithis: i remember you talking about it to one of the others... somthing about " Spells of Mass Destruction".

OOfangblade: SSSHHHH! keep it down, Dramadars got spys everywhere. if he so much as THINKS i've got a huge stockpile of Spells of Mass destruction and magic effects he'll raid my house...... not that they're in my house.

Sithis: so if he's taken most of you budget. what are you going to do about it?

OOfangblade: Do about it? i cant do anything. he's stripped me of most of my power. i cant do anything about it, so long as none of you get into any fights he wont have a reason to send in that army he's been training.

Sithis: army? Dramadar has an army?

***
(cutscene)
a training room, where many more dramadars sit watching the main Dramadar going through some slides.

Daramadar: and this *moves to next slide, a picture of OOfangblade * is the worst offender. not only has he repeatedly done over dramatic scenes but has repeatedly ignored warnings on such scenes. So far, his refusal to manifest in this reality has protected him. but one day, he'll take a wrong step. and then he'll be mine *evil laugh, pauses, glances around* .... i mean ours.....
DungeonJman

12-06-06, 07:22 PM		OODungeonJ: But wait a minute, wasn't that a really dramatic scene that you were just in?

Dramadar: Well... yes, WAIT I MEAN....

*all of the dramdars self destruct for being part of a dramatic scene*

Back on the forgotten freedom

Nobby: Anyway, with help from the lawspeaker, i'm ready to go after this *ahem*

Nobby Ferrins is not, nor may be responsible for the results of the information which he is about to reveal, any complaints are to otherwise be directed at the laws of reality, and upon attempting to attack him, will be directed to the safety clause. Any results unforseen by this statement will also be directed towards the safety clause.

Safety Clause: All beneficial actions resulting from the knowledge which Nobby Ferrins is to reveal will be attributed to him, while any negative or non-beneficial actions will be blamed on the laws of reality. All neutral cases will be decide by the appointed spokesperson of Nobby Ferrins
rampant

12-06-06, 07:46 PM		Satnak - (using a medium biped core) Eat Moonlight! *slash*

Serene - (heavy quad core) No match for my Kawasara *boom*

Over the ridge

Dorvos - (heavy biped) Hmmmmmmm..mm
*Sniper shot*
*Sniper shot*

Satnak - Going down.

Serene - Your next kid. *boost*
Kaizer_Ryu

12-06-06, 08:49 PM		*Powers up Dragonbalz style*
Elina: Ooooo! I don't have to worry about killing you now!

Miko: *glowy* ...you're bluffing, right?

Elina: :devil: I'll let you find out.

*MEGA AWESOME FIGHT THAT PUTS DRAGONBALL TO SHAME*

Miko: *pant* *pant* Frigging hell! Where did all this come from? You weren't like this in Droaam!

Elina: The unbinding of the seals my sister and I bear yield unpredictable results and can take time to manifest. Too bad for you.

Miko: Grrrrrr!!!!! *kills another Redshirt* MA-SEN-KO!!!

Elina: :eek:

The energy blast of pure Redshirt lifeforce rockets towards her, filling the hallway and making it impossible to dodge.

Kitsune: (in Elina's mind) Concentrate. You can use this against her. Find your passion as you did in Droaam.

Reaching deep, she taps into the buried ardor of her psyche, feeling it well up the same way it did against the mental avatar of the Shadow.

Elina: Bring it on, hussy!

With her gathered magical energies, she punches the DBZ ripoff move back at Miko, who nullifies it with some quick thinking and another dead redshirt.

Miko: *huff* What the hell?! That's just not righ-GURK!

Miko finds herself caught by the throat and slammed against, then through, the wall. She lands with a thud, looking up at Elina with a mixture of anger and recognition. The look on Elina's face was one she knew all too well, albeit younger and much less bloodthirsty. It is there only for a moment, though, as Elina returns to her usual self. She looks around, slightly surprised.

Elina: Did...did I do that?

Miko: :mad: That really hurt, you know?!

Elina is already gone. She runs down the hall, trying to make sense of what just transpired. She remembered returning the blast. She felt her inner strength boil forth...then...nothing till she was standing over Miko, victorious. But...there was one thing. Just before she lost it, she felt something. A presence maybe? The whole thing freaked her out far too much to think straight, but maybe her parents would know. Or would they freak out? Scold her? Worse? She shook her head, trying to stop that line of thought.

Elina: (i.h.h.) Why am I thinking like this? They'd never do that! ...would they?

-----

Terra: All right. I guess I'm in. What do you guys do, anyway?
rampant

12-06-06, 08:59 PM		Tirmek - Huh? Elina?
Kapow

Tirmek goes flying.

Sarah - Got ya! Huh Elina whats wrong?

Elina - I was just sparring, and then nothing, and then Miko was through a wall, and ... and :weep:

Tirmek - Jeeze Miko! talk about weak she beat you even blacked out!

Miko - Why you

Elina - Its not funny! I could have hurt her really bad!
------------------------------------------------------------------

Astral plane on a house sized husk with feline features

Near the left hand

A ragged mummified figure sits with an Angelic form made of stone and mist.

Form - What is the secret to its power?

Mummy - There is no secret

Form - You are compelled to answer truthfully.

Mummy - But not usefully, your own trick I believe.

Form - I will destroy it.

Mummy - How?

Form - There is a key to every lock.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-07-06, 02:28 AM		Sarah: Don't you think we should tell Mom?

Elina: ...I can't.

Sarah: Why not? You know she'd do anything to help.

Elina: But...

Sarah: *grabs her hand* Come on. I'll go with you.

Elina: No! *pulls away*

Sarah: :confused:

Tirmek: Are...you all right? This isn't like you.

Elina: No, it's...I just...I can't... (i.h.h.: Why? :( ) Promise me you won't tell anyone.

Tirmek: They'll find out eventually. It's better if you just say something. Hiding it won't do anyone any good.

Elina: I know, but...

Sarah: ...fine. But you will tell Mom! And soon, ok?

Elina: ...ok. (i.h.h.: Why is this so hard? Why can't I just say something? Why...? :( )
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-07-06, 08:39 AM		Terra: All right. I guess I'm in. What do you guys do, anyway?
13: Say we have a club.

Terra: That's it? :confused:

13: What other reason is there for a club?

Terra: A legitimate meeting of individuals to exchange information to further each other's understanding and enjoyment of a common interest?

13: Okay, let me rephrase that: What other reason is there for a god club?

Terra: Hmmm, point.

13: Oh, yeah, we do meet sometimes, I forgot to mention that.

Terra: :twitch: (i.h.h. Not going to get angry. Not going to get annoyed.)

13: :D Next one is in two days at sunset in the Secret Meeting Room.

Terra: The Secret Meeting Room. Got it. I'll need directions.

13: Go to Erk's Place…

Terra: Uh-huh.

13: …go up to the bar…

Terra: Uh-huh.

13: …sit down. You're there! :D

Terra: :uh-huh: You meet at basically the most public place in the nearer multiverse and discuss being a god?

13: Don't worry: most people there are too drunk or stupid to notice. Plus we're mainly griping about stupid people, anyway. :D
rampant

12-07-06, 10:01 AM		Tirmek - (i.h.h. This can't be a good sign. If she hasn't said anything by tomorrow, I'll step in.)
Charles Phipps

12-07-06, 10:03 AM		The Bar

Jarlot: Eh Quit your yammering!

Aerith: *sloshed* Yes, *hick* some of us quasi-deities are trying to drink *thumps her head against the table*
Norr

12-07-06, 10:07 AM		OONorr - You know, I just realized there are no disease on this ship. The closest we've gotten to an illness is pregnancy ('cause it makersy you feel sick) and Volraths Ioun kidney stone.
rampant

12-07-06, 10:57 AM		Forgotten Freedom : We're so nasty the diseases leave us alone!
rampant

12-07-06, 04:16 PM		Terrek - (holding results of the couple's lates tests) ....

Serene - Well?

Satnak - This is taking entirely too long to be good news.

Terrek - Serene is carrying as well as a first time mother can be expected to, please try to eat a little more my daughter.

Serene - ok

Satnak - *mother glare* Spill now

Terrek - (i.h.h. she's reached a whole new level of scary) ... The embryo has formed itself from the proto's, but its splitting again.

Satnak - That shouldn't be possible.

Terrek - Congratulations, looks like you are going to be the first of your family to bring forth multiple births.

Serene - *hugs satnak*

Satnak - :OMG!
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-07-06, 04:52 PM		Terrek - Congratulations, looks like you are going to be the first of your family to bring forth multiple births.
13: Do I even need to do it? Yeah, I do. :evillaugh
Kaizer_Ryu

12-07-06, 08:32 PM		Elina: :( Why am I so scared? Mom's never been anything but supportive when I have a problem.

Kitsune: You don't even know what happened.

Elina: Are you sure you don't either?

Kitsune: I know only as much as you do, unfortunately.

Elina: I even tried to get it to happen again...

Kitsune: Your sister was more than a little enthusiastic in helping.

Elina: She loves to fight. She finds combat exhilarating, you know that.

Kitsune: Yeah, but wasn't burying your face in the dirt a few times a little much?

Elina: I asked her to push harder than normal. She loves a challenge.

Kitsune: What will you do? You can't seem to duplicate it, and it hasn't happened before or since. Do you really need to worry her like that?

Elina: Sarah and Tirmek know about it. They agreed not to tell anyone so long as I did it myself.

Kitsune: Actually, you asked them not to say anything period.

Elina: I know, but they also know it scared me. Even though they didn't see it, it's not something they can just ignore. They want to look out for me. I'd be concerned if they didn't say something like that.

Kitsune: So you'll tell Terra about it?

Elina: I'm trying...but I can't seem to get the words out.

Kitsune: Then you don't want to?

Elina: No, I do. I really do. It's just...

Kitsune: The prospect of something being seriously wrong worries you.

Elina: I believe the proper term is "terrifies". I just have this feeling that Mom'll be upset with me if she knows.

Kitsune: Why?

Elina: I know it's foolish and silly. But no matter how much I tell myself that, I can't shake it...
rampant

12-07-06, 08:54 PM		Tirmek - Elina, I've been doing research and what happened is called losing time. It can indicate many things: possesion, unlikely due to your outsider heritage, overstimulation, again unlikely because even with the boosts Miko is just not that powerful or cunning, intense emotion, only if you had some reason to be really ****** at her or if you have an objection to the way she was slaughtering redshirts, overload, this one is likely considering your recent unbinding. The way I see it you tapped a little too much and the task of controlling it overran your concious mind and left your subconcious the task of defeating Miko. Without the guidance of the rational mind we no longer have the ability to see beyond the immediate, and Miko was an immediate threat. You sought to nuetralize that threat.

Sarah - :confused:

Elina - Not helping!
Charles Phipps

12-07-06, 09:44 PM		Miko: There's only one solution.

*BITES ELINA'S SHOULDER*

Miko: I'm going to drain your life energy to become all powerful.

Elina: Oh.

*pause*

Elina: Nothing's happening.

*Miko starts to cry*

Elina: Uhhh...

*Miko sniffles*

Miko: My succubi fangs are only stubs!
rampant

12-07-06, 09:49 PM		Tirmek - Um your getting confused, succubi use their lips not fangs.

Miko - Oh

Tirmek - Also as a Half-blood it might not mainfest till you reach maturity, or only have a limit to how much you can drain.

Sarah - Seriously :confused:

Elina - Again! not helping!
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

12-07-06, 09:58 PM		Chanse "Here you go yuo cute widdle black guard" hands Miko a small bundle

Miko "Lip gloss and traning brace..." :headexplo

Chanse "Ash sent them" :schemes:
Lord Kale Fangblade

12-08-06, 11:34 AM		a swarm of bats appears, and makes a swirling cloud next to Miko. the bats then meld together to form Sithis.

Sithis:*Glares at her* stay of my turf. if its not bad enough that Succubi get better looks, but now you've got FANGS too.

Tirmek: *looks at Sithis's right hand* ... sithis?

Sithis: yes?

Tirmek: your right hand is missing.

Sithis: *looks at the stump where his right hand should be* thats funny... wasnt like that before.... Oh no. one of them must of got lost again.

Sarah: what?

Sithis: one of my bat forms. you try controlling an amount of bats that equal my body weight. *sigh* i cant belive this. i really cant.

a small bat appears and lands on Sithis left hand.

Sithis: where have you been? didnt i tell you not to get lost?

Bat: *squeaks at a level only sithis can hear*

Sithis: i dont care if you thought you saw a frog. have you any idea how much trouble you've caused me?

Bat: *another sqeak*

Sithis: *sigh* fine. now get back to your place.

the bat melds into Sithis right arm and becomes his right hand
Paulon

12-08-06, 12:15 PM		OOC: Sounds like someone's a Black Ribboner. Gotta love Pratchett. :)
rampant

12-08-06, 04:03 PM		Ketty - You're kidding me! Thats not possible!

Satnak - I guess My mate's patterns won out.

Serene - :D

Ketty - That makes 3 total, you almost doubled the size of your clan!

Satnak and Serene - :D

Ketty - You'll be needing your half of the inheritance, i'll-

Satnak - NO!

Serene - You need that to put Tirmek through school.

Ketty - I'll find a way to -

Serene - By working yourself to the bone. I'mm sure you could do it, but you'd never see Tirmek. He needs you no matter how independent he seems. My father has plenty of money.

Ketty - How did you convince my sister to go along with that?

Serene - Handcuffs:D

Ketty - How did you find handcuffs she couldn't break?

Serene - You missunderstand she had to agree before I'd put them on her.

Satnak - :embarrass
Charles Phipps

12-08-06, 04:51 PM		Ketler: Man I was sooooo drunk last night. I should never go drinking with Jarlot. I must have had two...three beers.

*blinks*

*looks over to the side of his bed where Marish is sleeping*

Ketler: OH NO! I'VE BEEN SEDUCED!

*pause*

Ketler: .......how the hell did that happen?
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-08-06, 05:05 PM		Way, way, waywaywaywaywaywayway back when……

13 finds Silver watching some primaitve people mashing apples up in a big bowl.

13: What's going on here? :confused:

Silver: I had this brilliant idea: You know how decaying fruit causes animals to get a little loopy?

13: I know Bunny's all for it.

Silver: Well, it occured to me that there must be a way to replicate that. I figured out it's the microbes on the outside of the fruit eating the sugar and producing an intoxicating substance. So now I'm teaching people how to make it.

13: Why would they want to be disoriented?

Silver: Because it makes them less inhibited, more open to fun.

13: :thinks: ……………………… :eek: …………That is evil. Count me in.

Bunny: Me too. :devil:
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-08-06, 06:47 PM		More Rules from the incarnated god Jarlot:

If it appears on this thread here (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=749550) it is already against the rules.
rampant

12-08-06, 08:04 PM		Dorvos - Hmmmmm Hmmmmm

Rashour - What does that mean?

Old Dwarf Lady - He's hungry, your his cousin, you need to learn his language.

Rashour - :twitch:

Cole - Boom Boom Make go boom!

Maladren - Who gave him firecrackers! We already lost a mixing bowl and a mailbox!

Shroedigger - (holds up a finger painting of a crudely drawn {read : better looking} Forgotten freedom laying waste to a merchant fleet) I call it "Still less violent than a hockey game"

A.W.L. - Quiet! I some of us are trying to sleep.
cypher_zero

12-08-06, 08:43 PM		Rashour: *Facepalm* I'm related to you people?!
.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-08-06, 09:41 PM		OOC: Since Rashour and Serene are half-brother and sister, wouldn't that make Dorvos Rashour's nephew?

IC:

Elina stands outside her parents room, trying to convince herself to talk to her mother. She still can't justify her reluctance, but can't seem to shake it either. She can hear Terra shuffling about, apparently cleaning. After several minutes, she decides to go for it. Sarah or Tirmek would tell her anyway, so best to just get it over with.

Elina: *opens the door* Mom?

Terra: :) Hi, honey... I was wondering if you were going to come in. You've been standing there a while.

Elina: Um...yeah...well, there's something I need to talk to you about. *half hopeful* I'm not interrupting, am I?

Terra: Oh, of course not. Any time.

Terra sits on the side of the bed and motions for Elina to join her. Try as she might, Elina can't seem to look her mother in the eye.

Terra: What's up?

Elina: I...uh...um...

Terra: Honey...I noticed you've been very quiet since yesterday. I know Sarah's worried too. Did something bad happen?

Elina: ...

Terra: *strokes Elina's hair* Sweetie, if something happened, I can't help you if you don't tell me. I promise, whatever it is, I won't get mad at you. I'll only be disappointed if you feel you can't tell me or Momma what's troubling you. I want you to be able to tell me anything without worrying.

Elina: *looks up* ...ok. Yes, Mom. Something happened yesterday. Sarah and Tirmek were sparring, and I was bored. I wanted to see how good Miko was, so we started duking it out, too. She used some dark powers by sacrificing Redshirts and was able to keep up with me fairly well. But...

Terra: She didn't curse you or anything, did she?

Elina: No, no...nothing like that. She used this energy move, and I reflected it with a trick I learned before I came to in Droaam. I won the fight, but the thing is...I don't remember how.

Terra: You blanked out?

Elina: That's what Tirmek thought, too. I don't know. One second, I'm punching a giant ball of energy back at her, the next, I'm standing in front of a large hole in the wall, with Miko on the ground on the other side.

Terra: ...how long was it?

Elina: A few seconds, maybe. But still too long. I could really have hurt her badly! :weep:

Terra: *hug* Shhhh... *rocking slowly* You didn't, that's the important thing. Is there anything else you can remember?

Elina: *shakes her head 'no'* Nothing definite. I even tried to get it to happen again.

Terra: So that's why you three went off to One Eye so suddenly. And then came back so dirty.

Elina: Yeah. I wanted someone else to be there and observe. Maybe get some clues, but it didn't happen again. I wanted to have more to tell you.

Terra: *squeese* You're a sweetheart, you know that? I do appreciate the effort, but next time, tell me right away. I don't want you suffering all alone.

Elina: I'm sorry...I was really freaked out by it. It...scared me.

Terra: *hug* I understand completely, dear. I'm not upset. If it happens again and you come to me with it fresh in your mind, I might be able to find out more.

Elina: What if it doesn't happen again? Tirmek also said it might have just been an overload from the recent unbinding.

Terra: It's certainly possible that's what happened. If it doesn't happen ever again, then great. But if it does-

Elina: I'll tell you or Momma as soon as possible.

Terra: :) Good girl. *kisses her forehead* Feel better?

Elina: I think so. Thanks, Mom. *hug*

Terra: *hug* Any time, sweetie. Whenever you need me.
Charles Phipps

12-08-06, 10:04 PM		Miko: Hey, want to see a neat trick?

Ivy: What kind of trick?

Miko: Elina completely blanks out any reference that she's going to become the Ultimate Evil.

Lilly: What? That's ridiculous!

Miko: Hey Elina!

Elina: Hey Miko.

Miko: You know you're going to become the Queen of Darkness.

Elina: Why yes, I'd love to go get some lunch.

Miko: See?

Elina: See what?

Lilly: Wow, that is neat. Hey, Elina, you know you're going to destroy millions.

Elina: I'm going to win millions?

Ivy: That's cruel brother.

Lilly: Yeah, I wonder how long we can keep this up. Elina, you know you destroy the entire crew?

Elina: Stew?
Kaizer_Ryu

12-08-06, 10:44 PM		OOKaizer: :mad: Stop taking advantage of my Plot Device.

Miko: :P Or you'll what?

13: He'll give me access to your baby pictures. :devil:

Miko: :eek: You wouldn't dare!

OOKaizer: I wonder how all the other emo-goth chicks you brood around would react to this.

*Holds up a picture of a five-year-old Miko in a bright pink dress happily picking flowers as cute woodland creatures scamper around her*

Miko: :OMG! WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?!?!?!?!

A note poofs into existance:

This is just to ensure you won't go and prevent my corruption simply to satisfy your preemptive rebellious streak. Believe me, there's more where that came from. :evillaugh

-Queen Elina

*note vaporizes*

Miko: B*tch.

Ivy: :confused: How'd she get the smilie onto the note?
rampant

12-08-06, 10:56 PM		Tirmek - Well?

Elina - Yeah I told you can come out of dephcon 2.

Sarah - (popping out of no where) Phew I was afraid I'd have to conk you out!

Elina - YOU ACTUALLY WENT TO DEPHCON 2!!!

Tirmek - hehehe *anime sweat drop*

Sarah - Funny thing is, the shadows

Elina - Yeah someone's pulling on them.
-----------------------------------------------

Satnak - ... Is it just me or is it always dark in here?

Serene - Yeah its wierder than normal.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-09-06, 02:13 PM		Lisa: Just the four of them?

Terra: Oh, heavens no. Seven.

Lisa: Who else but the girls, Lilly, and Tirmek?

Terra: Sithis (OOC: hope you don't mind, Kale), Ivy, and Miko.

Lisa: Oh, ok then. ...but why now?

Terra: Mordain's been asking for it for a while. He's also been working on something dangerous in an attempt to overthrow the Hags. Since only Teraza is left, he preparing to start carving out his own domain.

Lisa: Not another Eldrich Machine I hope.

Terra: *sigh* I've had enough of those to fill a lifetime. But no. He's in the process of developing an army of Daelkyr-magic enhanced constructs. I know he's got a prototype up an running, and is planning to mass produce it sometime in the near future.

Lisa: I'd still feel better if we went along with them.

Terra: We can't always be there to bail them out. I want to see them in action without any real backup. I'll be observing from the shadows, but not much else. Besides, it's a spoof on a web comic by the runner up in the contest that made Eberron into the next official D&D Campaign Setting.

Lisa: Haven't we already done that?

Terra: Not to this extent.

-----

Sarah: Why do I have to be Haley? I feel naked in this outfit!

Tirmek: *as Vaarsuvius* At least you have a clearly defined gender identity!

Lilly: *as Roy* Blue really isn't my color, but I get a kick-awesome sword that deals an extra 2d8 to undead! *begins swinging it excitedly*

Sithis: Watch where you swing that, dammit! And why am I Belkar?

Elina: At least you're not supposed to be a Dwarven Cleric with an amusing yet incomprehensible accent. Which I am NOT going to do, by the way.

Ivy: :D I'm Elan!

Miko: :P At least one of us fits their role.

Sarah: :mad: Only because you're based on her in the first place!

Elina: I give you points that you don't hide the fact that you're evil, but other than that... :P
rampant

12-09-06, 03:09 PM		Tirmek - doot-de-doot-de-dooo

Lily - Why are you walking around with a bunch of power stones?

Tirmek - So I can use disintigrate, I'm not quite high enough level to learn it normally yet.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Rakshasa Bard - Bluff bluff bluff the stupid ogre

Rakshasa Assasin - How many times do we need to explain DO NOT BARDIC MUSIC THE SNEAKY SKILLS!!

Rakshasa Socerer - (i.h.h. I have one spell slot left I could use for disintigrate... The bard or the ogre ... I hate making tough choices.)
DungeonJman

12-09-06, 07:52 PM		Nobby: despite the craziness, and the length of time it has taken *stares at OODungeonJ*

OODungeonJ: What, i've been busy!

Nobby: Be glad i don't ask Kanatash or Liam, or whoever it is, if i can borrow the DM Breaker

OODungeonJ: OH FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD, NOOOO!

Nobby: anyway, i've given ample warning, so here it is:

Assuming that there must be a perfect being, it must not have flaws. By existing, it has a flaw, so it can not be perfect. (Which explains why none of the deities in Eberron actually appear, they may be perfect, but in order for that to be true, they can not exist).

This eliminates the possibility of a being representing the perfect codes of its alignment. Therefore, no beings can truly be the epitome of their alignment (Every inevitable, slaad, angel, devil, demon, formian, etc. suddenly loses their powers relating to them being the epitomes of their alignments). Wow, i didn't think that it would start that quickly, anyway...

So no being may be completely of its alignment, which means that they will always fall short, and thus fail to be truly their alignment. If they are not truely their alignment, then they must contain significant parts of other alignments, and thus can not be that alignment, or they must not exist in order to comply.

This works for every alignment (every paladin, blackguard, druid, bard, and every class that has an alignment restriction suddenly loses their powers if they weren't holding their ears shut), but due to quantum mechanics, both theories have to be correct, so everything does not exist.

A follow up theory may or may not be provided, on how i specifically use this while no one else, at least to my knowledge, can. However as of this moment, i believe i better run for my life from the angry mob of classes that lost their powers from the laws of logic suddenly catching up, because even though they can't hurt me, their weapons can.

*quickly runs below deck*
Kaizer_Ryu

12-09-06, 08:10 PM		Terra: You're thinking about this way too hard.

Nobby: :meep:

Terra: We represent a force of the cosmos, thus, we don't have to be perfect. Me? I'm nowhere near perfect. But I still exist as the embodiment of shadowmatter. It's not a state of being, its a force of existance. A force is not required to be perfect, just consistent.

*all is set right*

Terra: There. Besides, alignment is far less strict in this world. The Allmighty Fiendish Bovine spoke thusly, and so it was true. Beware, for he is always watching...:shifty: *disappears*
DungeonJman

12-09-06, 08:22 PM		Nobby: Ok, you have me there on the part about deities, but that still doesn't disprove the other parts of it. Saying that alignments are less strict, you're disproving their meaning. If you say that alignments are based on what a creature normally does, then animals can't be considered neutral. If its based on moral capacity, then most beings creature don't act like their alignment, a fair amount of the time, and neutrality itself is impossible.

*laws of physics readjust once again*
rampant

12-09-06, 09:00 PM		Satnak - Alignment is a fuzzy oft abused word, it means what you strive for whilst maintaining a certain standard of behavior. Its not so much an abstract ideal as a combination of your goals, and methods.

Tirmek gets his incarnum power back, and promptly breaks Nobby's jaw.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-09-06, 09:15 PM		Terra: *sigh* Don't punch the newbie for not understanding the difference between mortal logic and divine logic. *heal*

Tirmek: Awwwww...

Terra: *to Nobby* Alignment is dependent on sentience. If a creature is non-sentient, they are neutral because they cannot make moral decisions. If a creature has sentience, their alignment reflects their choices as well as the likelihood of what they will do in the future. In order to be of a certain alignment, one only needs to advance that alignment with their behavior. A Paladin seeks to spread Good and respect Law, but an Evil law can be struck down. This does not make them change alignments, it is merely looking at the bigger picture. An unjust law is not the same as Law. Neutrality is a separate thing all together. It is not guided by any higher ideal, just utilitarianism.

Nobby: Beings supposedly exemplifying one alignment still don't measure up.

Terra: Because they cannot be grouped with the beings previously discussed. Take the angels for example. You are trying to get them to conform to the Mortal idea of good, not the universal idea of Good. They are very similar in many respects, but are not the same thing. Much like how mortal laws do not necessarily exemplify Law. They are forces, Mortals turn them into ideals.
DungeonJman

12-09-06, 09:15 PM		*reality shifts back to normal*

Nobby: Hey wait a minute, doesn't something bad usually happen when reality is messed with like that.

OODungeonJ: Hey you're right, I wonder what's going to... AAAAAAGH

*OODungeonJ is sucked through a dimensional rift before being deposited on the forgotten freedom*

DungeonJ: wait, i just lost the OO in front of my...

*looks around at the deck of the forgotten freedom*

DungeonJ: Wow, this is bad on so many levels, but i'll start saying them: 1: How the heck am i expressing my thoughts here if no one's doing the typing?

Nobby: Apparently your mind is linked with the keyboard back there, and so everything that we/you think and say is being typed.

DungeonJ: So wait a minute, how..

Nobby: do i know all of this? Because i haven't been used enough by the other entities to form a seperate personality, so i'm tied to..

DungeonJ: my mind. So that explains why we're finishing each others sentences. But what about the other problem?

Nobby: Oh no, that, well, fortunately, satnak is here, and because of the way this works, we have about two minutes to tie you up before it happens.

Note: Don't try to make a way to answer this. This is something that I have to explain what it is, so don't hijack the explanation. Hey wait a minute, i can still write OOC ?
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

12-09-06, 10:06 PM		OOC Eled: Buddy, thaaaats not your biggest problem. On a ship full of atractave Violent lesbians your thoughts get typed... Do I need to paint a picture here?
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-09-06, 10:13 PM		[alignmnet junk]
Bunny: Soooooooooooooooooo much easier just to kill things. :bored:

13: Do you suppose we could get OOcat into non OOC mode?

OOcat: No, because I am different: I am in OO mode, not OOC mode. My name is "OOcat", not "OOCat" or "OOCcat".

Silver: So what does that mean?

OOcat: That I am simply "Out of".

13: —your mind? :D

OOcat: Among other things………:shifty:
DungeonJman

12-09-06, 10:14 PM		*DungeonJ starts talking to the sky*

Look, i don't know about the other E.B.N.E.'s, but i remain with decent thoughts intact. I didn't get lawful good results on every personality test i have ever taken for nothing, although that is going to be why i'm going to have to be restrained for a while.

*sees the Terra, Tirmek, Nobby and Satnak looking at him like he's crazy*

What? Oh, right.
Charles Phipps

12-09-06, 10:47 PM		OOCharles: Actually, I'm invoking my Overgod powers.

OOKaizer: Hey, we're ALL the DM.

OOCharles: But I'm the DM-IEST.

OOKaizer: Phooey.

OOCharles: In my interpretation of Eberron based on Keith Baker, alignment is fundamentally based on the tendencies of a specific being to act in a very individual way as opposed to an absolute rule. Ultimately, the final rule of Eberron in the FF verse is you're judged by your most noble aspect and your most horrendous deed.

Cardinal Kronzen for example was a great believer in law, goodness, honor, and nobility. The fact he was a scheming bastarve that tortured children immediately shifted his alignment to evil despite the fact that he was overwise a stand up guy. This, being of course, before he was completely around the bend worshipping demons thanks to a certain Kalashatar's influence.

Rose and Jarlot are both thieves, liars, and brigands. They actively work to humiliate and bedevil the law at every opportunity while caring very little who they steal from. Ironically, their tireless opposition to evil and willingness to sacrifice themselves to protect the unfortunate makes them chaotic good despite the fact they've both probably killed people that didn't deserve it.

The exceptions to this rules are the fiends and GREATER divinities on this world. Khyber is the embodiment of pure evil, Siberys is the embodiment of pure good, and Eberron is the embodiment of Balancing them to create the multitude of life that is the average being on Eberron. They're very clearly abstracts and so are the majority of their celestial creations.

The Sovereign Host on the other hand are elevated Dragons created by the Three Gods working in concert to influence the mortal races (at least in my game) and far more Greek or Norse like than the above beings. As such they're essentially possessed of free will. It's why Dol Arrah (An archangel like goddess) is noble and pure but Dol Dorn (more like Thor as Jarlot describes him) is pretty much the god alcohol, tobacco, and firearms.

Terra as a former human being is essentially also possessed of free will as strangely are those celestials possessing human bodies while on Eberron. Aerith is certainly PREDISPOSED towards goodness but can act against her own nature due to the human body she's wearing and the soul she's merged with (something which makes her a bit of an outcast amongst her own kind). Miko is a half-fiend and even more than her mother (whom exists to keep Michael as a lazy slothful dirtball...not that hard) has the option for rising above her darker nature.

Celestials not possessing a human aspect are terrifying to humans whether good or evil.

And yes, I went to the trouble of describing the cosmology of the FORGOTTEN FREEDOMVERSE....oiye ve!
urial angel of death

12-09-06, 11:06 PM		OOC: Time for a random spoof

IC: Volrath is talking to a woman in rather provocative leather as they walk through a cult temple.

Woman: So you don't believe in the Great Old Ones anymore because of the Rocky Horror Picture Show?

Volrath: Yes you see Dr. Frank-N-Furter represents all us cultists. He preforms evil acts and plays people against each other just as we are taught to do. Also just like us is able to preform magical feats such as raising the dead as we do with our tomes. But despite doing all this he is still unable to ascend to his home planet, just as we will be unable to go to our masters' realm.

Woman: Oh my gods you're right! What have I done with my life?

Volrath: Well I suggest taking the money you made *****ing youself out to strangers, buy yourself some normal clothes, and settling down with some nice man or woman to start a family. Cause all we have is each other and the loving relationships we form.

*Woman leaving the temple.*

*Volrath jumps onto a bench right next to Kanatash.*

OOC: Incase you haven't figured out yet that was a Dogma spoof. If someone would like to do the next part they can, but if no one does I will finish it on my own.
DungeonJman

12-09-06, 11:09 PM		DungeonJ: Ok, so i think that Nobby's done with the alignment question.

Nobby: Yeah, pretty much.

DungeonJ: I do have a good question about free will, but i'd rather not make a fuss about it.

*realizes that he's still on the Forgotten Freedom and no one's heeded his words yet, so he starts looking for a good spot on the ship, where he won't be able to get out and affect the crew, and the crew won't be able to affect him, at least, for both of those, for a while.*
Charles Phipps

12-09-06, 11:36 PM		Rose: Ah, great another Red Shirt to abuse.

DungeonJ: I'm not a red shirt. I'm an entity banished to the Forgotten Freedom.

Rose: That explains why all your words are typed above your head.

DungeonJ: *looks up* weird.

Rose: Now I guess the only thing to do is tie you to a typewriter and thus allow me omnipotent power by making whatever I like into reality!

DungeonJ: Like that John Candy movie?

Rose:....yes. Exactly like that.
DungeonJman

12-09-06, 11:48 PM		Anyway, it doesn't work like that, i've lost most of my E.B.N.E. powers, except being able to talk to the other E.B.N.E.'s

Rose: So no omnipotence :( ?

I'm afraid not. Also, i need to find a place where i can't affect the crew members or have them affect me.

Rose: Oh yeah, you keep yammering about that. What's that supposed to mean?

Well, in my own world, i follow a very strict code of honor, to an almost ridiculous point (apologizing for the slightest mistakes, etc.), so when i was transferred here, my force of personality, determined my strength, so by those standards, i'm an epic paladin/knight/kensai. This being the Forgotten Freedom, however, and the fact that i've had a barrier to block out the full extent of the horrors that occur here, the inherent chaos of this ship, and the evilness of most of the crew is overwhelming enough, that if i don't seal myself off within 30 seconds after i'm done talking, i'll start indiscriminately start smiting the evil members of this crew, like Lilly was doing.

Rose: And???

Well, i've got 6 times as many paladin levels as Lilly, I won't be able to control it, i'm stronger overall, i can raise myself from the dead repeatedly, and my sword makes the sword of that demon, what's his name..., Arijani, look like a +1 longsword.

Rose: Well, good thing that most of those are redshirts.

DungeonJ: (i.h.h. How does this guy not show up as evil?)
rampant

12-10-06, 12:00 AM		Satnak - Sutehk thats the name of the demon in Lisa's sword.

Tirmek - Speaking of which Mrs. Hopeforged Please tell him to shut up!

Lisa - *slaps pommel* Bad sword!

Satnak - Yawwwn!

Dungeonj - Urge to smite necrocarnate rising

Satnak - *glare*

DungeonJ - not so much anymore...my eyes are burning
DungeonJman

12-10-06, 12:07 AM		*after DungeonJ manages to stop his eyes from burning*

Thanks, i needed that. Uh, so what do i do now, considering that i'm probably stuck here for a while. Oh and for the record, i meant Arijani's former blade, Soul Stealer, not the blade with the demon of the flame trapped in it.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-10-06, 12:13 AM		Nevermind, it's not funny anymore. :(
rampant

12-10-06, 12:15 AM		Serene - SATNAK! YOU ARE ON BEDREST! GET HOME NOW!

Satnak - I WAS FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

gets dragged back home by her tail

DungeonJ - :confused:

Erk - I need dishwashers!
Kaizer_Ryu

12-10-06, 12:27 AM		*outside of Mordain the Fleshweaver Lich's (yes, he's Xykon in this spoof) Castle*

Lilly: Ok, we've managed to kill all his guards...

Sarah: *looking around* What did you do with the ones who surrendered?

Lilly: I do so enjoy the tingly feeling I get when gaining EXP.

Tirmek: :uh-huh: And how again do you keep your Paladin levels?

Sithis: The gate is locked, the castle walls are warded, and his archers will get me or Miko if we try and fly over.

Ivy: Bluff, bluff, bluff, bluff my way in the door!

Miko: :rolleyes: I see the apple doesn't fall very far from the tree...

Elina: There! All done. We can go in now. *points at the wall*

The carcasses of the dead enemies are stacked into a ramp leading up and over the wall.

Sarah: Ew...

Tirmek: Well...it certainly is a...unique solution to our problem...

Ivy: What do you think, brother? ...brother?

Lilly: *at the top of the wall* Hurry up or I'm not sharing anything from the Poorly Locked Treasure Chests I find! *jumps down*
DungeonJman

12-10-06, 12:27 AM		Look, no offense Erk, but i know how this works: If i take a job at the bar, that hasn't been occupied, i'm gonna end up here forever.

You know what, i think i'm just going to roam around the ship, like pretty much everyone else does. Oh, and a word of advice to some of the ubers: stop trying to obtain so much power, because all of the plotting ends up making you angsty, leads to all sorts of problems, and generally makes your life worse. Especially when the power comes from giving up all that you are, in order to become better than another.

And that's my ominous, yet non-revealing tip/hint of the day.

*heads to another part of the ship*
Kaizer_Ryu

12-10-06, 12:32 AM		Oh, and a word of advice to some of the ubers: stop trying to obtain so much power, because all of the plotting ends up making you angsty, leads to all sorts of problems, and generally makes your life worse. Especially when the power comes from giving up all that you are, in order to become better than another.

And that's my ominous, yet non-revealing tip/hint of the day.

*heads to another part of the ship*

OOKaizer: :rolleyes: Dude, you're preaching to the choir. We only do that when it's funny or dramatic. Then we completely ignore it in every other respect.

Terra: :bored: Most of us got bored with that ages ago anyway.
DungeonJman

12-10-06, 12:34 AM		*turns around*

No, it's supposed to be a...


Nevermind, you're not obviously going to listen.

*walks away*
rampant

12-10-06, 12:45 AM		DungeonJ - I feel purple

Nobby - Beats yellow

Chalky - KHehehehe
Charles Phipps

12-10-06, 12:46 AM		*heads to another part of the ship*

Five Hours Later

*DungeonJman hangs over a boiling pot of chili*

Rose: So you couldn't keep your mouth shut about the cool sword could you?

Jarlot: My sword is longest!

Lilly: There's too many paladins on this ship anyway.

Norbaz: Mmmm flavorful.

OOC: Meant in a joking manner my friend. Yes, we get the joke and it's funny.
DungeonJman

12-10-06, 12:55 AM		FOR THE LOVE OF... LET ME DOWN FROM HERE!

Rose: Yeah, right :bored:

*DungeonJ begins swinging back and forth while tied up, and the rope frays and breaks, with DungeonJ, hitting, but not falling into the vat of chili. It then spills out, rushing towards Rose, Jarlot, Norbaz, and Lilly*

You forget, i still have the power of a decent plot device on my side, even if its a rip off of an adventure movie. Only another E.B.N.E. can cancel that. And to think i was going to help you guys alter the future for the better!

(i.h.h. If this doesn't work, without giving things away, then i really can't trust them to help me with this.)
Kaizer_Ryu

12-10-06, 02:23 AM		As DungeonJ rushes them:

Rose: So anyway, I still say you're wrong about Drizzt.

Jarlot: Oh, come on! How can he not be!

Lilly: Dad, admit it. He's obviously a little light in the shoes.

Rose: :mad: DRIZZT IS NOT GAY!

Norbaz: If anyone cares, I'm going to go sit in the corner as my entity continues to forget about me...

Jarlot: He has long monologues about his feelings, trouble with women, and a scimitar named TWINKLE for Mom's sake! These are not unrelated!

DungeonJ: :uh-huh:
cypher_zero

12-10-06, 08:00 AM		Oh, and a word of advice to some of the ubers: stop trying to obtain so much power, because all of the plotting ends up making you angsty, leads to all sorts of problems, and generally makes your life worse.
Terrek: I AM NOT ANGSTY! :tantrum:
.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-10-06, 08:16 AM		OOC: Kazier, it might help if you put the OOTS names after the character names, because it's really hard to tell who's who at the moment (other than Ivy).

Chilli: *glorp* <Translation: I feel so unloved :weep:> (sulks away to devour redshirts)

Erk: Why would I recruit a newly-arrived E.B.N.E. as a dishwasher? There are at least 45 crewmembers no longer in use.

Vrin: :bored: After working for Klaz I was fully qualified for cleaning off the stuff they serve here.

Awakened Dire Food Stains: *GLORP!*

Vrin (dual-wielding dish-cleaner and a brush): Eat my current resemblence to Dri'zzt!
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-10-06, 08:17 AM		Terrek: I AM NOT ANGSTY! :tantrum:
13: It's true, he isn't.

Bunny: He's an overlord, he's arrogant.
DungeonJman

12-10-06, 09:41 AM		A flaw is a flaw.

*begins walking away to look for a more intelligent crew member*

Well, i obviously can't trust them to help me.. i better find a more intelligent crew member or if all else fails... , oh and by the way, thanks 13.

13: Hey, letting you out annoyed them in some way, it's what i do.:D
Chrys

12-10-06, 10:07 AM		D'Ducky So why are you trying to Hide in a giant cardbord box?

Chrys Er... I kinda sort... deleted Aero Game...

D'Dcuky I'm sure that if just explaine...

Chrys On purpose...:hides:

D'Ducky Nice knowing you.

OOAero When I find you I'm so going to smite you!

D'Ducky So is she still Lawfull Good?

Chrys Right now I'm going with no...
rampant

12-10-06, 11:50 AM		Dorvos - Hmmm Hmmmmm

Satnak - Come here Dorvos *uberhug*

Dorvos - Whhhhhzzzzzzzzmmmmmmmmm

Serene - Ok a few too many hormones in her system. Back to bed Silly Girl.

Satnak - awwwww
Kaizer_Ryu

12-10-06, 12:46 PM		OOC: Kazier, it might help if you put the OOTS names after the character names, because it's really hard to tell who's who at the moment (other than Ivy).
OOC: I'm not going to do a straight interpretation of the characters. I'm going more for keeping their original personas intact while adding elements of the character they're supposed to be. Thus, they'll be doing things that are in character (my interpretation, at least) for either personality, but not necessarily both.

So I don't have to type it repeatedly, I'll just give a quick list of who's who:

Sarah = Haley

Ivy = Elan

Lilly = Roy

Sithis = Belkar

Miko = Miko Miyazaki, the Paladin who is somehow not a Blackguard

Elina = Durkon

Tirmek = Vaarsuvius

IC:

Outside a room filled with strange, twisted creatures, the party speaks in hushed tones.

Lilly: How many are there?

Sarah: Twelve...no, thirteen.

Tirmek: Hey, Spoony Jr. I believe I have a spell of power that may help.

Lilly: Sounds good, and don't call me "Spoony".

Tirmek strides confidently into the doorway and strikes a dramatic pose.

Tirmek: Behold your fate, creatures of darkness! Your demise is at hand, for I wield arcane power beyond your feeble minds reasoning! The forces of the very cosmos are mine to command, and yet still you cannot comprehend the dark dismal end in store for you and your wicked compatriots! Your little brains can only leave you gasping in horror as I bend reality to my very will! The magic I wield is capable of rending asunder the universe - nay, the whole of the multiverse, and is in fact wasted on such pitiful creatures as yourself. But I shall bring it to bear nonetheless, and you shall rue the day I chose to wreak such unimaginable havoc on your lives with the sheer power of my arcane works. And lo, in days and years to come, when the children come to play in the smoking crater that was once your den of evil *blah* *blah* *blah*

Creatures: :zzz: :zzz: :zzz:

Sarah: Good job, Tirmek! Your spell put them to sleep!

Tirmek: But...but...I did not yet cast the spell... :(

Ivy: :zzz:

Sithis: :zzz:
rampant

12-10-06, 03:33 PM		Satnak - Um Serene

Serene - I'll get the portal going.

Dorvos - Hmmm?

Satnak - We need a sitter.
-----------------------------------
Maladren - Sitter senses tingling, must hide!

Dorvos appears with a note pinned on his body wrap.

it reads :

Nice try:P

Maladren - *sigh* Oh well...Wanna go steal a Stratavarius?

Dorvos - HMMMMMMMMM!!
Chrys

12-10-06, 03:51 PM		The reason Silver isn't allowed to cook ;) (http://www.kawaiinot.com/?p=44)

:P
rampant

12-10-06, 04:28 PM		thats wrong on levels i don't even want to think about

...

I have got to use this to snap someone's mind.
DungeonJman

12-10-06, 05:18 PM		What's a Stratavarius?

Maladren: How did you get in here? :confused:

Former E.B.N.E., i know how to get around the ship very well, but that's not what i came here for. I need to inform somebody intelligent on this ship of something of great importance and I need them to follow through on it. Can i trust you to do this, or am i going to have to keep looking?
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-10-06, 05:26 PM		Tirmek: [long and boring oration]
13: Hmmmmm…………:devil:

Bunny: Back off! He's still mine!
The reason Silver isn't allowed to cook ;)
Silver: And yet I'm allowed to brew refreshing "adult beverages".

Elina: So does that mean I have to worship you?

Silver: Only if you want to get roleplaying XP.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

12-10-06, 05:27 PM		OOC Eled: :teach: Stratavarius was a Violin maker, I think Renasance period, but may be wrong. His introments are unspeakably valuable, and heald to have an unmatched sound (Being indifferent to classical music I think thats just people ratonalising paying six figures for a string instroment, but Im a cynic )
DungeonJman

12-10-06, 05:48 PM		*shouts up to the sky again*

I thought she was talking about something different, i didn't know that Eberron had violins. And you ruined the ominous and dramatic moment!

*Maladren is staring at him*

What? Oh, right.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-10-06, 05:50 PM		OOC: My only thought about whoever came up with that abomination is...we need to get them posting here. :D

IC:

Lilly: Why is everyone just standing there looking worried?

Elina: Lilly, did you fail your Spot check?

Lilly: I might have, why?

Giant Three-Headed Chimera (goat head): No reason.

Sarah: Sneak Attack!

...

...

...

Sithis: *whispers* Sarah, you won initiative. Attack again.

Sarah: Oh, right. Sneak Attack!

GTHC (lion head): *shocked* That first attack was unexpected, but the second one I really didn't see coming!

GTHC (dragon head): Never the less, Master Mordain sent us to destroy you.

GTHC (all): We are Trigak, resistance is futile. You will be eaten.

Lilly: Arcane Smi-!

Trigak (dragon head): *Flame Breath*

Lilly: :eek: :weep: IT BURNS!

Miko & Elina: :hoppingma

Elina: Ice Storm!

Trigak freezes.

Miko: Shatter!

Do I really need to describe what happens?

Lilly: Why did you go and do that?!

Miko: Oh, crap, you're right! Quick, find the beast's heart so I can offer it to my dark gods! Only then will they aid me in enslaving you! That's the same as love, right?

Elina: :mad:

Lilly: He had a name! He was supposed to be a recurring villian!

Tirmek: Oh, well, we still got EXP for that battle...

Lilly: All we had to do is defeat him for that! He didn't even get to do a monologue about how feeble we were or that he'd be back for revenge more powerful than ever! This is all wrong!
rampant

12-10-06, 07:28 PM		13 - Silver dissapeared again.

Bunny - You know the drill

Roosevelt - I'll go get the boards.
Charles Phipps

12-10-06, 08:53 PM		*Our Heroes, or the reasonable facimile thereof, start walking down the hall with Ivy clanking all the way*

Villains: Huh, I hear the heroes coming. Let's take all of our money in these treasure chests and flee.

Lilly: Damnit.

*Ivy continues clanking*

Villains: Huh, do you hear them? Yes, I guess we should also remove these expensive magical wands and empty their charges before they can be used against us.

Lilly: GRRRrrrrr....

*Ivy continues clanking*

Villains: I think we'll also just retreat and deprive them of EXP.

Lilly::headexplo

Ivy: Err...sorry?

Lilly: Obviously we need to increase our stealth capacity.

*Lilly starts to take off his clothes*

Sarah: GAH!

Lilly: Don't worry, this will also increase my Dexterity bonus so I don't actually lose any AC.

Ivy: Is that how it works?

*a pixellation is around Lilly*

Lilly: YES! I AM NOW INVINCIBLE!

Tirmek: Oh dear Gods!
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-10-06, 09:05 PM		Somewhere else on Khorvaire, another mystical quest is beginning………

Nalfein (wearing a huge yellow hat and blue robes that obscure everything except the glow of his eyes): So why are we walking through the King's Forest?

Stupid (composit plating painted red): To get to the Cave of No Return.

Nalfein: Riiiiiiiiiiight. And we'd want to go there because ………?

Stupid: Dude, weren't you listening to that old man who tipped us off?

Nalfein: The one who looked suspiciously like a small, black bunny?

Stupid: The Cave of No Return is where the Armor of Invincibility is located!

Nalfein: Wait, if it's called the Cave of No Return, how does anyone know what's inside?

Stupid: Well, who do you expect besides a god of death to know what's inside a deadly cave?

Nalfein: ………………………………………………………………OK, I'm Fireballing the whole forest right now.
rampant

12-10-06, 09:05 PM		Hammering x4

Text box - Miko gained perv smack!!

Lily - My life is pain!
---------------------------------------

Text Box - Hahaha Puny shifter. You cannot eat me!!.

Chalky - zzz

Text box - Why does everyone ignore me!!:weep:
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-10-06, 09:07 PM		Sarah: GAH!
……………………
*a pixellation is around Lilly*
OOC: Darn, rampant beat me to it.

Silver: Well, at least my planned romance is still secure.

Yvi: Hey, what about us?

OOcat: Well, since Ivy already has a brother who's occupied in a role, we can't do the whole "evil twin" thing.

Yvi vansihes in a puff of inneccessity.

Muradin: muradin no get to smash and talk without capitalization? :(

Saberiel: As a lesbian, I'm all for not doing this. :bored:

Pun-Pun: Just so long as Satnak doesn't find out I've been brought back to life.

OOcat: I didn't bring you back. :confused:

Pun-Pun: :eek: *re-croaks*

OOcat: Hmmmm…………I still think an evil counterpart love interest for Elina would be fun.

Silver: Well it would certainly get this love triangle with Miko out of my hair. Not that it isn't fun…:shifty:

OOcat: Miko, hmmmmmm………………

Silver: :blink:……………:OMG! BAD ENTITY! BAD!
rampant

12-10-06, 09:08 PM		Kithle (in a blue wig) - Your GP or your HP!

Rose (with a red hat) - (i.h.h. give him the gold as long as you survive you still get exp)
Charles Phipps

12-10-06, 09:23 PM		Thorn: Hehehe, little do they suspect my plot to destroy them all.

Mordain Fleshweaver: Alright, who left the damn Mirror of Opposition by the Spoony Paladin. Great, now we have ANOTHER child blackguard.

Thorn: I'm not a Blackguard. I'm a Cleric/Fighter with a specialization in Reversing Healing Spells and a Nightmare mount.

Mordain: Doesn't that strike you as unnecessary?

Thorn: Not until this moment.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-10-06, 09:23 PM		Lilly: *running about* WOOOO!!! I'M INVISIBLE!!

Miko: :stare: :love:

Elina: :headexplo Blindness!

Miko: Nooooooo! :weep:

Tirmek: *closing his eyes tightly* Oh, for the love of-! My eyes! My poor useless eyes! Damn my Spot Check!

Sithis: *eyes also closed* Do something! He's your brother!

Ivy: *blindfolded* Ni-san! Please, wait! Where are you?

Lilly: I'm over here. I know you can't see me since I'm so good at hiding now.

Ivy: Brother, this is ridiculous. You have to put some clothes on!

Lilly: No way! I've never felt so free! And I'm much more agile without all those bulky clothes!

Tirmek: No, you're not. Regular clothing doesn't even have a penalty. Hell, it doesn't even count towards encumbrance!

Lilly: Are you sure? How do you know unless you try?

Tirmek: Well, since that's not going to happen, I guess I'll have to live in eternal uncertainty. Now get dressed.

Lilly: Nu-uh! I can hide better naked, so naked I shall remain!

Sithis: Uh...hey! What if we get Elina to cast Cat's Grace on you? That way you could remain agile, but clothed.

Elina: :blush: :blush: W-w-what?! :blush: :blush:

Lilly: Hmmm...I suppose. But wouldn't it be even better to cast Cat's Grace and then stay naked?

Sithis & Tirmek: :eek: NO!

Sithis: It's...uh...in the spell description.

Tirmek: Doesn't stack. Honest.

Lilly: Oh, well, I guess that'll work.

Tirmek: *whispers to Elina* Quick! Cast it before he changes his mind!

...

...

Tirmek: What are you waiting for?

Elina: :blush: :blush: :blush: ...it's a touch spell... :blush: :blush: :blush:

OOC: Silver, I actually have an evil love interest for Elina ready to go. Gives new meaning to a love triangle, if you get my drift. :plotting: But the more the merrier.
Charles Phipps

12-10-06, 09:33 PM		Doog Junior: Doog like Thorn.

Mordain: Doog had a son? Isn't he a homosexual?

Doog Junior: Doog's father experimented in college.

Mordain: Interesting and he had a half-orc son. Wait, Doog went to college?

Thorn: Yes, he's half-orc, half-orc. And yes, he often goes to college for the purposes of trapping food. Freshmen are the easiest to catch and eat.

Doog Junior: Doog smash things real well from his double half-orc bonuses.

Thorn: As I understand Doog Junior is Ishmael Junior's son.

Mordain: Wow, Caralot is at it again. If I could muster actually caring about you people, I'd be impressed.

Igor: Vere veady to vestroy vhe vorld sir.

Mordain: For the last time, I don't want to destroy the world. My stuff is there! I just intend to wreck it! Now don't bother me.

The Unspeakable Horror: Can I come out from the shadows now?

Mordain: NO!
DungeonJman

12-10-06, 10:53 PM		That's it! I can't take it, i do not stand around giving hints in the shadows, i am a leader at the forefront of the fight against evil!

*after much running, DungeonJ arrives at Liam's workplace*

*pant* wow, that was *pant* fast.

Liam: What the ??? Where'd you come from?

Not important. Listen, you still have the DM Breaker, I need it for something of the utmost importance, plus, i'll get to annoy some entities while i'm at it.

Liam: Really, including mine? :devil:

I can't promise anything, but i may be forced to.

Liam: Ok, here it is, so what's the first step?

Hang on: Kaizer, i'm pretty sure i hear an inevitable coming for you. Better be ready for it.

OOKaizer: Where?!?

*Gets blasted and is knocked out cold*

Liam: okay, wait, isn't it against the paladin's code to lie.

It's Kaizer we're talking about, regardless of what i say there's going to be an inevitable after him

Liam: good point, and now?

I go to stop his plot devi...

Oh great, they're in the middle of an OOTS plot, so i can't do anything. Well, better sit here with the DM Breaker to make sure he doesn't wake up til they're done. And better get the backup weapon ready, for when he gets mad at me for doing this.

Comicar: Where's OOKaizer? *looks down* Oh, never mind. *walks away to find others who have completely ripped off the contents of comics*
rwarner3701

12-10-06, 11:20 PM		Since you seem to be borrowing so much from it I thought I would post a link to the comic for anyone who has been living under a rock...

http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots.html

In a completely unrelated note I never did a party for Jarlot but with the power of flashbacks it may be coming soon... or I could get busy and never get around to it...
Kaizer_Ryu

12-10-06, 11:32 PM		Dramadar: I have come for your head.

Kaizer: *dressed like this (http://tn3-2.deviantart.com/fs6/300W/i/2005/105/8/4/Ryu_from_Breath_of_Fire_2_by_Kerwyn2.jpg )* Get in line. :bored:

Muliebris: Your days are numbered.

Comicar: Time to die.

Naggat: You shall avoid me no more.

Gram'mar: I shall fight for you my lord!

Kaizer: You've got your own duty to fulfill. They're just doing their job.

Gram'mar: ...as you wish, my lord.

Kaizer: So...who goes first?

All: I will! No, I will! I saw him first! You just want him for yourself! My purpose is to destroy him, not let some poser do it for me!

Kaizer: :bored: I'm waiting.

All: You shut up! Where was I? Oh, yes. He's mine!

Kaizer: Can't I just fight you one at a time? You can draw straws or something.

All: And risk having nothing left to kill? No chance!

Kaizer: Then we are at an impasse.

All: Not quite. SNEAK ATTACK!

Each Inevitable strikes out at all the others in an almost symmetrical motion. The resulting carnage leaves none standing.

DungeonJ: :mad: That's not fair!

Kaizer: The ironic thing is I still get experience for participating. *ding* *Level up* Hey, sweet! New White magic! All right, since I'm here, I might as well look for the fabled Infinity Gene so I can defeat the Goddess of Corruption, Myria.

Jumping off the side of the ship, he transforms into this (http://psp.yourpsp.com/media/disk/game/breath_fire/bof3_screen_10.jpg) *sorry, best pic I could find* and flies away.

DungeonJ: He's almost as obssessed with that game as he is with Legend of Zelda...wait a minute. Wasn't it just supposed to knock him out?

Liam: Yeah, well, Kanatash has the original. I did my best to reconstruct it and I haven't field tested it yet. I guess this is the DM Breaker 3.0.
rampant

12-10-06, 11:56 PM		Satnak - Shouldn't this get easier!!

Serene - Breathe

Satnak - huuuuuuuuuuuuuu

Serene - Breathe

Satnak - hwoooooooo

Terra - at least we don't need the earmuffs this time
Kaizer_Ryu

12-11-06, 01:54 AM		OOC: What do you think you're doing?

Kaizer: Oh, crap. You're awake, are you? That was fast.

OOC: The DM Breaker series works to it's full effect only when wielded by the target's creation. That, and this is my OOC mode. My avatar, OOKaizer, is the one out of the loop at the moment. Now stop fooling around and get back in my head.

Kaizer: No way. This ROCKS!

OOC: :mad: Don't make me come down there.

Kaizer: Or you'll what? I know as well as you do that so long as your avatar is out of commission, you can't do squat to restrain me.

OOC: You forget...

Terra: Yo.

OOC: I have other ways of effecting this world.

Kaizer: Sweet! I was wondering who would play Nina. Interested?

Terra: *shrug* I'm game.

OOC: Hey!

Terra: Being in three places at once isn't that hard. But this doesn't mean I'm your girlfriend.

Kaizer: It's only stated in the fourth Breath of Fire that Nina ever likes Ryu in that fashion. It's hinted at in the second and third one, and strongly so in the first, but never stated. He's her knight in shining armor in the fifth.

OOC: Don't you ignore me.

Terra: Where to first?

Kaizer: To Seren Island, where rumors of a long lost Dragon Clan may lead the way to the power of Infinity. Then, with the help of the Holy and Trance Gene's I picked up, I shall be able to transform into Kaizer Ryu! The most ultimate 31337 UB3r p0wnz0r since Link!

OOC: I really hope my avatar wakes up soon... I shudder to think what will happen if Elina is made aware of her current fate...
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-11-06, 08:34 AM		Kithle (in a blue wig) - Your GP or your HP!

Rose (with a red hat) - (i.h.h. give him the gold as long as you survive you still get exp)
OOC: Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiice.
IC:
Nalfein and Stupid get back to Wroat, followed by a moving bush.

Stupid: Why didn't we look for the Cave of No Return.

Nalfein: Because there is no Cave of No Return.

Stupid: Oh, yeah, like the old man would lie after I gave him all our money.

Nalfein: *mad face*

Stupid is looking the other way.

Nalfein: *stabbity death!*

Stupid's armor: *tink*

Nalfein: Grrrrrr, lousy warforged plating…… Okay, you go off and look at swords, I'm going to go find that old man and "thank" him.

Stupid: Good old Nalfein, always being polite to people. Yay! Swords!

Nalfein quickly finds a retirement home.

Old Man: ………you have to realize, these were the days before the Forgotten Freedom—

Nalfein: Eat electric death, old man! *Chain Lightening!*

FX demon: *freeze frame*

Nalfein: Hold on, hold on! I should be able to do fireball more than once per day!

OOcat: But since it's your signature spell, it has to replace HADOKEN.

Nalfein: What? I'm a 2nd ed wizard, not some 2-bit color mage!

OOcat: Technically it's 8-bit.

Nalfein: Whatever! Look, the point is I'm not going to do your silly little parody if I can only Fireball once a day!

OOcat: But you're the most trigger-happy mage on the ship, who else am I going to use? You're not going anywhere.

Nalfein: Make me.

Bunny: HADOKEN!

Nalfein: ………………………………Ow.

Bunny: Best part is, I can use it at will. :devil:

Nalfein: :eek: Sowhat'smynextscene?
Gladius_Lucix

12-11-06, 08:42 AM		Bunny: HADOKEN!

Nalfein: ………………………………Ow.

Bunny: Best part is, I can use it at will. :devil:

Nalfein: :eek: Sowhat'smynextscene?

OOGladius: Isn't keeping crew members in line, even for a parody, useful?

----

Liam: You know, this version of the DM Breaker might be fine how it is. :devil:

OOGladius: My Fellow Entities, I believe it is time to flee in terror.
DungeonJman

12-11-06, 08:45 AM		Why OOC Kaizer? What's going to happen?
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-11-06, 08:47 AM		OOGladius: My Fellow Entities, I believe it is time to flee in terror.
OOcat: I'm fine. :cool:

Liam: DM breaker fire!

*COSMIC ZAP!*

OOcat: :bored:

Liam: :eek: H-h-how?!

OOcat: You see, unlike some other entities, I am actually constructed of all my myriad characters as a whole. Thus I'm not realy a DM, so I can't be affected by the DM breaker.

Liam: No fair! :mad:

13: But the price is it has to put up with us all the time. :devil:
DungeonJman

12-11-06, 08:57 AM		Wait, so when i get out of here, will i be semi-immune to the DM Breaker considering that i would have been a character for a while?

*OOKaizer begins waking up*

Aaaah! It's alive!

*blast*
Kaizer_Ryu

12-11-06, 10:01 AM		Aaaah! It's alive!

*blast*
KaizerV2.0: *dressed like this (http://wallp.tvn.hu/Jak3-03.jpg), A.W. Lightningbolt as Daxter* :w00t: ness!

OOC: :mad: Oh, great. Thanks a lot for that.

DungeonJ: What'd I do?

OOC: When you hit my avatar with that abomination, it allows part of my whole to escape into this world.

*Giant shiny pillar can be seen from the direction of Seren as the ground shakes*

OOC: My inner otaku has been dying for this opportunity.

KaizerV2.0: I need to find the Precursor Temple so I can balance out the Dark Eco coursing through my body with Light Eco before it destroys me. Now I'm off to kill Metalheads, be angsty about being kicked out of Sharn and exiled to Valenar, and search for Precursor artifacts while being hit on by just about every female I encounter.

OOC: See? This is the only way any part of me could ever possibly get a date.

A.W. Lightningbolt: I'm right behind you, buddy! Way behind...

The two grab a conveniently placed speeder bike and ride off into the distance.

DungeonJ: And what's going to happen if Elina discovers her fate?

OOC: Bad things.

DungeonJ: ...okaaaaaayyy...what kind of bad things?

OOC: Very bad things.

DungeonJ: :bored: Details?

OOC: The power of the Dark gods being released upon the world prematurely.

DungeonJ: :confused: Wouldn't that be a good thing for them?

OOC: They want to corrupt the world, not destroy it. There's no point to destroying the world where all the stuff you want is. If unleashed too soon, they will destroy everything inadvertantly.

DungeonJ: And how, exactly, would trying to save Elina by warning her of her fate cause it to happen?

OOC: If she learned that was her most likely future, and that Miko comes from that future (making it all the more likely to happen), it would begin a chain of events that would almost inevitably lead to the true awakening of her dark side. She's unstable as it is. And before you ask, killing her is not an option.
cypher_zero

12-11-06, 10:52 AM		Terrek: You certain? It does seem like the best course of action... (Sees Terra running at him) Ahhh! Teleport! Teleport! Get me out of he-

-blip-
.
rampant

12-11-06, 11:44 AM		Terra - They're both trying to come out at once!

Serene - WHAT!

Terra - We're gonna need to operate.

Satnak - Raaaaaaah

Terra - Basically we cut her open and try to pull the babies out that way...only

Serene - You can't get through her hide.

Terra - No I can't, not without harming the children.

Satnak - Ssssereeeeene

Serene - I'm right here love.

Satnak - You can do it. You *hssssssss* know me, my body, better than anyone else. Your claws are sharp enough and your fingers skilled enough. *rrrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaghhhhhhhhh hhh*
-unconcious-
DungeonJman

12-11-06, 12:06 PM		Except i wasn't thinking of doing any of the things that you were mentioning.
Chrys

12-11-06, 12:17 PM		Aero: Hells I'm glad I can't reproduce...

Chrys Well it seems now you can... Yeah they made so the only way to get more Erinyes to for them to give birth to more. Plus you Base critter breeds like Silvers.

Aero: But... Ha I'm still under age you your can't do any plot like that any way.

Chrys Don't worry about that, I have no reason to do a plot like that. And any way you'd lay eggs.

Aero Good... If I'm here are you're here who is running thing... oh Hells you dis not let Daddy...

Chrys No -ing Way I would let him do that! I have it on auto-plot (Tm)

Aero I'm so going to smite your for that pun!

Chrys Exit Stage Right :P
urial angel of death

12-11-06, 12:49 PM		OOC: Would it be in bad taste to use Klaz in the way far future plot?
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-11-06, 01:03 PM		Nalfein: Okay, I wanna no which one of you old farts took money from my friend Stupid!

Attendants at the Nursing Home: Oh, thank you, kind yet dark one, thank you!

Nalfein: Aren't you supposed to be afraid of me?

Attendant 1: Oh, we are, O Savior! We are! But we are glad to be rid of those old men who have not been outside this nursing home in ten years! Praise thee for saving us!

Nalfein: YEARS?! You mean I killed them for nothing. I mean, I have nothing against that, butit doesn't get me my money!
********
Later, walking up to a magic shop……

Nalfein: Healer magic? How can it even be real magic if you can't kill anything with it? "Oh, look at me, I'm a flower-child peacenik who gets to ride a unicorn." Gag me. (turns to go)

*BUMP!*

Nalfein (getting up): I swear I'm going to ki—

Linda (in white robes): Oh, I'm so terribly sorry.

Nalfein: :love: Hub guh……

Linda: Are you hurt?

Nalfein: (i.h.h. Think, think, you moron! The most gorgious woman in the universe is right in front of you! Turn on some of that wizardly charm!)

"I am the Nalfein! I casts the spells that makes the peoples go bye-bye!"

Linda: ………………………Okay. Nice ot meet you. I'm just going to walk away. Please don't follow me.

Nalfein: I think she likes me.
Charles Phipps

12-11-06, 03:35 PM		Wow, Nalfien is rapidly rising to be one of my favorite characters for his excellent impersonation of Black Mage.

:-)

Rose: As an Elf, I am superior and require all your money.

No, you can't be Thief.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-11-06, 03:59 PM		No, you can't be Thief.
OOcat: Yeah, Kithle's the only bastard on this ship magnificent enough to replicate Thief.

Kithle: :D Thank you.

OOcat: I call 'em like I see 'em.

Rose: But I don't want to be Red Mage!

OOcat: Relax, I don't think you're twink enough. Besides, it has to be someone completely convinced of their own brialliance but not really smart enough to see how dumb they are.

Rose: Almost sounds like Lilly.

Lilly: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
rampant

12-11-06, 04:15 PM		Tirmek - No he's doing the OotS thing with me.

Lily - Thank you!

Tirmek - Wanna switch? How Am I supposed to be Vaarsuvius? Atleast you're a caster.

Lily - No way No one knows what gender V is!

Tirmek - Beats being gender confused.

Lily - Huh?

Tirmek - Here look at the archives for 8-bit, Debra.

Lily - You can be Roy! You can be Roy!
Charles Phipps

12-11-06, 04:19 PM		Ivy: Okay, can I trade you Elan for Vaa?

Lilly: But you're the Bard.

Ivy: *bluff*

Lilly: Hmmm you raise a good point.

Ivy: *diplomacy*

Lilly: By golly, that's right.

Ivy: *influence reaction*

Lilly: Okay, sure you can be Vaarsuvius.

Ivy: Okay.

*Ivy goes and sleeps in the girl's room*

Lilly: Why do I have the odd feeling of being outrageously conned?
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-11-06, 06:06 PM		OOcat: Yay! Now we can do evil twins because Lilly is certainly Elan enough to make an opposite!

Silver: Plus we can always say that they're half-brothers. ;)
Charles Phipps

12-11-06, 06:30 PM		OOC: This will actually make Mordain Fleshweaver our most well developed villain ever. I accept the award for this entire monologue ;-)

*Mordain has since given himself fully to Lichdom and is in a typical Skeletor like throne room*

Mordain D'Phiarlan: Ah, at last I can sit on my throne of bones and enjoy the most forbidden of delights available to mankind.....that of warm hot cocoa.

*starts to sip his tea as it goes down his bony mouth before spilling through his rib cage in tattered vestments*

Igor: Mahssher, ders a grop of haros...

*Mordain smacks Igor jaw really HARD and there's a cracking noise*

Igor: *spit* Oh Thank GOD! Finally, my speech impediment has been corrected. At last I can speak in the eloquent manner to which I am accustomed.

Mordain D'Philarlan: Go away kid, ya bother me.

Igor: Sir, there's a strike of Hobgoblins going on. They question the value of how preparing to slaughter all living things will serve the Dhakaani.

*Mordain doesn't turn but simply casts Epic Chain Lightning down the hall off screen as there's hundreds of screams*

*Mordain continues drinking his cocoa as he casts Animate Dead without the vocal component by simply waving a bony wand with the skull of Orcus on the end*

Zombie Hobgoblins: Braaaaainnsssssssssss.....

Igor: *secretly Hobgoblin himself* Errrrr....I suppose that's one way of dealing with them.

*A pair of glowing eyes peers from the shadows*

The Unspeakable Horror: Can I come out now?

Mordain D'Philarlan: When did I say that you could come out?

The Unspeakable Horror: When the world is destroyed.

Mordain D'Philarlan: Then here's a newsflash....YOU CAN'T COME OUT! Igor, what time is it?

Igor: It's 3 o'clock.

Mordain D'Philarlan: Excellent, just in time for my musical monologue.

Igor: Oh no.

*Mordain puts on a straw hat and pulls out a cane*

Mordain D'Philarlan: *is quite obviously dubbed as the entire song 'I'm So Lonely' from Team America: World Police*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lsa_EKfFlm4

Mordain D'Philarlan: And because of my loneliness I'm going to wreck the surface world.

Igor: Is that true?

Mordain D'Philarlan: F*** NO! I'm doing this because of the Belicose Intelligent Group Targetting Champions and Heroes.

Igor: You're doing it because you're a B.I.T.C...

Mordain D'Philarlan: Finish that sentence and I'll feed you to my cannibal flumphs.

Igor: GASP! CREATURES FROM FIRST EDITION.

Mordain D'Philarlan: For years the members of B.I.T.C...errr well THAT GROUP has been the victims of superheroes. Skeletor, Azalin, Mumm-Ra, Thoth-Amon, Sauron, Emperor Palpatine, Ganondorf Dragmire, Lechuck, Vecna. All of us horrifyingly evil undead monarchs get knocked around like we're nothing. NO MORE I say.

Igor: Some of those aren't undead monarchs.

*Igor suddenly catches fire*

Mordain D'Philarlan: So I've developed an eldritch machine to finally change the world for the better. Bluntly, it changes the narrative rules of storytelling. It does so by harnessing the fact that everyone knows good guys suck.

*he points to the control that says suck*

Mordain D'Philarlan: By using this power, the desire to know for bad guys to win becomes so powerful that they SHALL IN FACT despite the confines of the rules always seem to show the bad guys losing.

Igor: Brilliant sir. What does that have to do with us?

Mordain D'Philarlan: I've lured the Forgotten Freedom: The Next Generation...note how annoying a title that is....here to get my revenge on Rose and his heirs!

Igor: You're mad at the Spoony Bard??

Mordain D'Philarlan: *grumbles* Yes, he sort of thwarted my evil plans for two hundred years.

Igor: Uh....huh.

Mordain D'Philarlan: Well SOMEONE has been kidnapping Zella all these years. I swear, I just wanted to get revenge on that ***** for snubbing me in Wizard School!

***

*Zella is in a cheerleading outfit while Mordain Fleshweaver is a typical nerd...except still undead*

Zella: You suck!

***

Mordain D'Philarlan: and Rose rescued her all those times! I swear, he also stole my nifty glowy....

*picks up a piece of Triforce*

Mordain D'Philarlan: Nifty glowy Pyramid Thingy.
*Shakes the Triforce a bit*

Igor: I see sir.

Mordain D'Philarlan: Yes, until he tragically defeated my army of Eriynes invading the world with a silver arrow to my heart.

Igor: errr sir. I have a video cassette here that shows he beat your Eriynes army through entirely different means.

Mordain D'Philarlan: WHERE DID YOU FIND THAT!

*Igor inserts the tape into the television built in VCR*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8HQJpza5lLA

Igor: Achika is played by Elizabeth Hurley too. Rowr.

Mordain D'Philarlan: Let us never speak of this again.

Igor: Yessir.

Mordain D'Philarlan: *taps fingers like Mr. Burns* Excellent.
DungeonJman

12-11-06, 06:55 PM		(wow, i can not believe how badly this is going to mess up the plot, but it's pretty funny)

*appears in Mordain's chamber, where him, Thorn, Doog Junior, and the Unspeakable horror from the shadows are*

Look, sorry to do this, but it's for your own good: so the Comicars and the heroes don't get you.

Mordain: No, i can not be defeated!

Look, have you even seen what happens to Xykon in OOTS? You don't even have a well guarded phylactery for when you die. So you can't be that well prepared

Mordain:*pulls it out* yes i do it's right *sundered* I really shouldn't have fallen for that

You're a cliche villain, it's what you do.

Mordain: Well, i still have the Unspeakable Horror!

No, i promised to let it out of the shadow's if it gave up without a fight, behind your back.

Mordain: *to the UH* Traitor! *turns back* Well, this stinks, you even know how many parts of this plot you are ruining?

I'm doing this as part of a helpful cause. When i get back to being an E.B.N.E., I won't be able to do anything helpful again. So i'm giving you, Igor, and the rip offs of the Linear Guild a minute to drop your weapons and tie yourselves up, or else i can't promise you anything.

Mordain: Two things i have to ask: 1: weren't you watching over someone? 2: Why am I not dead, despite you destroying my phylactery

Oh that, i made sure to have a guy take care of that.... and another guy with the coolest weapon ever make sure that he does his job right.

*scene switches to Liam watching OOKaizer while holding the DM Breaker 3.0, while a squirrel is guarding him*

Liam: Can i please have a lunch break???

*Squirrel pulls out the ONE TRUE "GUN THAT SHOOTS LASER SWORDS WITH GUNS ON THEM THAT SHOOT OTHER LASER SWORDS" and points it at Liam*

Squirrel: Squeeker Squeak! (Be quiet and sit down!)

Liam: *sweats* Fine, fine.

*back to Mordain's chamber*

Mordain: And #2?

You have to be alive until the actual heroes of the plot come and slay you, but i could smite you pretty badly in the meantime.

*in the background, unnoticed, 13 smiles at the whole messing up of the plot and taps his fingers in the Mr. Burns style, like Mordain was doing*

13: Excellent.
Charles Phipps

12-11-06, 07:06 PM		OOC: Don't worry, I'm a professional writer. I'm able to RAILROAD ;-)

DungeonJammer: I'm pleased in any case I could be the big hero.

Mordain: Yes, you certainly beat me by virtue of your invoking narrative superiority.

DungeonJammer: Yes I cer...

*Mordain turns on his machine*

DungeonJammer: Oh crap.

*Is teleported back to the top of the Dungeon*

Dungeon Jammer: Great, now I'm trapped in Groundhog Day.

***

Mordain: One thing. he's right, do everything differently that caused the Order of the Stick to win in the last comic.

Igor: Yes sir.

***

Lilly: Is it just me or does anyone feel they've just been screwed.
DungeonJman

12-11-06, 07:12 PM		DungeonJ: One problem, you sent an alternate version of me to the top when you activated that device.

Mordain: What the ??? Oh ....

*quickly interrupts Mordain by hitting the reverse button on the machine, before jamming the controls, causing bad guys to lose before the heroes get to them, as long as the machine is on. So as a result, Mordain starts crumbling into dust*

Mordain: Nooooo! why did i put a reverse button on that thing!!!

Because, it's a stinking evil plot device accomplishing machine, it ALWAYS has a reverse button!

*Mordain crumbles into dust*

Now, are the rest of you going to try to be wise guys or what?
Charles Phipps

12-11-06, 07:19 PM		Mordain: Now that's just cheating.

OOCharles: Oh well.

On an alternate and yet amazingly similiar universe where things haven't been interfered with

Mordain: Now where was I with my evil plan?

Igor: You were talking about your narrative device.

Mordain: Yes, with it, I'll wield the power to defeat all people who'll ruin my plots.

OOCharles: Except for entities that want to ruin the plot.

Mordain: Yes, except for them.

*A huffing and puffing Dungeon Jammer arrives on scene*

OOCharles: Don't.

Dungeon Jammer: But...

OOCharles: Do I interfere with your life changing narratives?

Dungeon Jammer: But the universe is in peril!

OOCharles: *crosses arms*

Dungeon Jammer: Oh fine!
DungeonJman

12-11-06, 07:24 PM		It's not my fault, if OOCharles comes up with random names and expects me to be them and... *slaps forehead* Oh no, now we have yet another alt on the loose!
Charles Phipps

12-11-06, 07:33 PM		Yes, YES WE DO.

:-)
rampant

12-11-06, 07:48 PM		OORampant -DungeonJ these are spoof plots you don't need to end them, if you have something else you want to do just go for it. Spoofs are just what happens between plots. Or don't I'm enjoying the frustration.
---------------------------------------

Serene - Oh gods no! I can't hurt her!

Terra - You have to!

Serene - I can't do that to her!

Terra - You'd rather I blast her open! and risk the children?

Serene - No! but...I just

Terra - I just can't hurt her:weep: !

Terra - You're not hurting her, you're saving the children inside her. If we don't get one out soon they'll both be crushed. THink for a moment: Would Satnak die to protect Dorvos!

Serene - :weep: yes without hesitation

Terra - THen a simple cut to rescue both of these children is nothing!

Serene - She'd hate me forever if i didn't, wouldn't she?

Terra - ...

Serene extends a single razor claw.

Serene - Her skin hardens on impact, the trick is to slice with as little pressure as possible.

Places her hand on Satnak's stomach and slowly moves it down. The flesh parts ever so slightly.

Serene - Any deeper would trigger the reaction.

Serene repeats her previous movement

Serene - :weep: This is horrible i can't bear the thought of causing her more pain.

Once more.

Serene - There its done:weep:

Terra - On It!
Paulon

12-11-06, 08:20 PM		OORampant -DungeonJ these are spoof plots you don't need to end them, if you have something else you want to do just go for it. Spoofs are just what happens between plots. Or don't I'm enjoying the frustration.

If nothing else, it's discourteous to try to completely derail the work someone else is putting into a joke. Funny interference is fine, but trying to stop the whole thing outright isn't fair on the originator(s).

Be warned: The last person who kept on pushing to cause problems to other people's characters despite the IC and OOC warnings wound up stripped naked, tied up, and thrown into the lower decks with a sign on him saying 'Fresh Meat'. ;)
Charles Phipps

12-11-06, 08:21 PM		OOC: Actually, I was enjoying that bit of back and forth. The fact the narrative plot device didn't work was because I didn't get his name right.

:-)
Kaizer_Ryu

12-11-06, 08:46 PM		The group has succeeded in clearing the floor of monsters, and beaten the Iron Golem guarding the entrance to the stairs leading down to the next level.

Tirmek: (i.h.h.) At last, the stairs down!

Sarah: (i.h.h.) That Golem was worth a ton of EXP!

Tirmek: Time to go down a level!

Sarah: Time to go up a level!

Tirmek: :confused: Up a level? But we already did that.

Sarah: Sure, now we do it again!

Tirmek: Why? What's up a level?

Sarah: More Sneak Attack!

Tirmek: :eek: What?! We'll get sneak attacked if we go up a level?!

Sarah: No, just me silly.

Tirmek: *raised eyebrow* You want to go up a level so you'll get sneak attacked?

Sarah: Naturally.

Tirmek: No way. That's too dangerous. We go down a level instead.

Sarah: :confused: Down a level? Wouldn't you need like...a Vampire or something for that?

Tirmek: Huh?

Sarah: Anyway, what do we get if we go down a level?

Tirmek: Tougher monsters! :devil:

Sarah: :uh-huh: You want to go down a level AND face tougher monsters?

Tirmek: Of course.

Sarah: Wouldn't it make more sense to go UP a level before facing tougher monsters?

Tirmek: No, we already finished that level. We should go down.

Ivy: Ah hah! A new Spell level!

Tirmek: L-E-V-E-L.

Ivy: Huh?

Tirmek: I spelled "level".

Ivy: :confused: But you're an Erudite. You can't learn spell levels.

Tirmek: Can't spell?! Is that another "Fighter classes are dumb" crack?! That is it, we're going down a level!

Sarah: :mad: Up a level!

Ivy: :( But if we go down a level, I will lose my spell level...

Tirmek: L-E-V-E-L.

Ivy: Huh?
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

12-11-06, 09:04 PM		Random {yes its him} bystander "well you better go up a level or down a level at the same time, you do want to keep a level playing feild so that everythings on the level, dont you?"

(OOC: Kaizer, that was beutiful :clap: )
DungeonJman

12-11-06, 09:28 PM		*notices the universe revision*

So wait a minute, when will i know that the group has come up here, and if an E.B.N.E. refers to them, how will i know which universe it's talking about? :confused:
Kaizer_Ryu

12-11-06, 09:49 PM		OOC: Thanks Eled, but Rich Burlew is the one I ripped off, so he gets the real credit.

And urial, I don't think anyone will mind you using Klaz in a way far future thing. Maybe you can finally show us the results of his "$6 billion dollar man" transformation. :D

IC:

Kaizer stands before a group of adventurers, eash seeming to be a type of shifter of varying ferality (is that a word?). Terra had to dispel her doppelganger to concentrate on Satnak, so his companions are as follows: A female Half-Celestial Sorcerer/Aristocrat (CG), a male tiger-shifter Rogue/Frenzied Berzerker (CN), a half-giant/half-fiend Erudite/Kineticist (LN), a male wolf-shifter Samurai (freelance) (N), a female fox-shifter Ranger/Sorcerer/Eldrich Knight (LN), a creepily hot female Quasi-Diety Yuan-ti Wizard (CG), a pint-sized Warforged (channeling a Celestial) Fighter/Wizard (NG), a female tiger-shifter Barbarian (CG), and a female dog-shifter Artificer (NG).

(OOC: If anyone can PM me with the correct names of each of the characters I just described, you get a Special, Limited Edition :88E: plushie, signed by the Lord of Madness himself! This is the only one, and it's first come, first serve!

Entering this contest consitutes agreement to waive Kaizer_Ryu and his affiliates of all responsibility for any damage incurred to the recipient's brain from exposure to :88E: plushie, or any other damages associated with ownership of an object of otherworldly insanity.)

Kaizer Ryu: *now has blonde hair from transformation* Now that we have shown the Dragon Elder our resolve and skill, he has granted me the power of the Infinity Gene! Now, to find our way across the Desert of Death that leads to Myria! The Brood shall be avenged!

Half-Celestial: :D *hug*

Kaizer Ryu: :cloud9:

Tiger-Shifter (male): *groan* Well don't that just beat all...
Charles Phipps

12-11-06, 10:27 PM		Miko: Hey Tirmek. I still can't believe Lilly waved around his weapon like that earlier.

Tirmek: *thinks* Oh God, she's talking about Lilly naked again!

Miko: Who knew that it was so long! That thing was huge!

Tirmek: *thinks* Bad Image! Bad image!

Miko: I wonder how many pluses he had for it!

Tirmek: *thinks* OH Goddd....wait, she could be talking about his sword. His LITERAL sword.

Miko: Are you okay?

Tirmek: Yeah, that's a big enchanted blade he uses...in combat....by which I mean the longsword.....in the actual tense of being a metal object. Damn! So much sword imagery is innuendo-like!

Miko: Oh, I was talking about his p....

Tirmek: GAH!

Miko: Well he DOES have an 18 Charisma!
DungeonJman

12-11-06, 10:51 PM		*As the OOTS crew of the normal FF universe approaches the lair of Mordain the Fleshweaver*

*from behind the door* For the record, Mordain crumbled into a thousand pieces, but i need to talk to you about something important.

Igor (in english accent): He's not dead yet.

What do you mean he's not dead yet, i broke his phylactery and his eldritch machine!

Igor: Give him a few seconds, he'll get better!

I'm telling you he's dead.

Igor: He is not dead yet, he can dance and he can sing, he is not dead yet, he can do something, he is not dead yet, no need to go to bed, no need to call the doctor cause he's not yet... *clunk*

That's it, when they get back to the forgotten freedom, and you have to go with them, you are so getting returned to normal. Oh and for the blackguard's sake, turn off your detect good ability when you come in.

The first E.B.N.E. to identify wins the "Legendary Black Beast of AAAAAUGH Award", as symbolized by this beholder smiley: :behold:
Charles Phipps

12-11-06, 10:58 PM		I believe your funniest sketch yet there Djam.
urial angel of death

12-11-06, 11:55 PM		OOC: I apologize but his transformation will not be shown, and he will be one of the few survivors. Also Rampant don't take this the wrong way but I assumed that somewhere down the line Satnak got killed just like almost everyone else.

IC: year 2008 A.D.

Zack Jarlot and his wife Andrea pulled up to a featureless beach on a cloudless sunny day.

Andrea: You sure we're supposed to be here? I didn't see anyone on the road for a good twenty minutes.

Jarlot: Relax it's fine. You said you wanted a deserted beach and I got you one.

Andrea: Still it does seem alittle too deserted.

Jarlot: Could you please just calm down!

Andrea: Sorry I'm just alittle anxious because of the weight I'm putting on.

Jarlot: *i.h.h.* Geez she's already skinny enough. A well best not to have an arguement while on vacation.

Elina: *jumping out of the car* Seeya mom, I'll be trying to find more animals. *races down the beach*

Andrea: Do you think it's safe for her to go out there alone?

Jarlot: *pulling out folding chair* We're on a deserted island. What's the worst that could happen?

---------

Elina pushed through folliage at the beach's edge. Pearing back at her was a beautiful little insect. It looked like a wasp with butterfly wings and the most delightful pattern of colors all over its body.

Elina: *giggle* Oh you're so cute.

Elina stood very still as the bug approached not wanting to scare it off. Then as it reached her more slowly poured from the surrounding plants.

---------

Back at the beach Andrea and Jarlot heard screams.
rampant

12-12-06, 12:24 AM		Serene - :weep: *sniff*

Terrek - It's going to be alright my dear.

Serene - But I...I hurt her:weep:

Terrek - Saving the lives of your children. She will understand, she went through much worse than a mere slash long before you met her. That is nothing to her. Losing one or both of those children would have done far worse than any physical wound ever could.
--------------------------------------------------------------------

Rashour and Dorvos are being babysat by Maladren

Dorvos - Hmmmmmmmm Hmm Hmm Hm HMM Hm HMM

Rashour - Don't get you shorts in a twist.

Maladren - Play nice (dangles play mouse in front of Rashour)

Rashour - Mousey!
-----------------------------------------------------------------

Later

Terra - You can come in now.

Serene and Terrek Enter

Satnak is asleep (again) cradling one little bundle in each arm.

Serene - Is she alright?

Terra - She's fine i've seen her take worse than that little scratch before breakfast.

Serene - She doesn't do anything before breakfast! I'm lucky if I can get a robe on her!

Terra - The chili was extra spicy that day!
Charles Phipps

12-12-06, 01:03 AM		Rose: 2008 A.D.? Wow, that's impressive we last that long

Kanatash: Well we have a fun little joke. We intend to invade and destroy humanity right when you finally get all your crap together for a bright and glorious future.

Rose: SO...never?

Kanatash: A year after Star Trek's last series ended, we destroyed all life in the universe and the living envied the dead in that universe.

Rose: KIRK WILL STOP YOU!

Kanatash: He fell on his head and died.

*Rose starts to cry*
rwarner3701

12-12-06, 01:12 AM		Throughout the ship a voice emanates from the walls. "Will Alkran please report to the helm."

Jarlot stands impatiently at the wheel when Alkran comes rushing up.

Alkran: You called for me?

Jarlot: Yes, weren't you supposed to be throwing me some kind of party?

Alkran: ...we did.

Jarlot: I think I would remember the party to end all parties.

Alkran: Thats the thing you had to much to drink even for you and must have forgotten it.

Jarlot: That is... entirely possible but shouldn't I remember the hangover the morning after?

Alkran: Yeah you should but I think you may be blocking it out for some other reason.

Jarlot: Really?

Alkran: Maybe if you concentrate really hard...

----
The sorroundings begin to shimmer and fade as the scene changes to a bedroom where Jarlot is seen sleeping next to someone who is turned on their side.

Jarlot rolls over to the side wraping his arm around the other person.

Jarlot: What the hell is this?

Dooj: Just give me five more minutes, baby.

Jarlot: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Dooj: You are really noisy in the morning.

Jarlot: Dooj, what the hell happened last night? ... And why does my :censored: hurt?

Dooj: You fell down the stairs.

Jarlot: Oh, good. So nothing happened.

Dooj: Of course not. Not really.

Jarlot: What does that mean?

Dooj: We were just a couple of guys... helping each other out. That's all.

Jarlot: I'm sorry, but what does that mean?

Dooj: It was a really magical night, Jarlot. Don't ruin it.

In some other part of the ship

Cabin Boy: Maybe now Jarlot won't make me hide anymore.

----
Back in the present.

Jarlot: :OMG! Oh.. my.. god...

Alkran: Well that was interesting

Jarlot: We will never speak of this again.

Alkran: What if nothing really happened?

Jarlot: Never again!!

In the hallway just outside the door a single tear runs down Cabin Boy's cheek.

Jarlot: Lets move on as quickly as possible what happened at the party?



OOC: Continuation coming soon
rampant

12-12-06, 02:02 AM		Serene - they're so beautiful

Terra - Two little girls, reminds me of when Elina and Sarah were born...well except for the cats twitching on the floor.

Fuffy - (too many flicky things)

Slaypaw - :twitch:

Rip - (di-i-i-ii-i-i-iz-zy-y-y-y-y)

Mittens - (must ...focus on ...just ...one)

Tear - ( can't ... keep track )

Shred - (I'm gonna hurl)

Satnak - I think tha four tails each over loaded the poor fuzz balls' tracking systems.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-12-06, 03:12 AM		The party camps for the night.

Lilly: Because you don't need to sleep, that's why!

Ivy: But if I'm on watch, I can't replenish my spells...

Lilly: I...good point. So who else do we have for a watch?

Tirmek: Myself, Miko, Sithis, and Sarah.

Lilly: An untrustworthy Half-Fiend, a Blackguard-

Tirmek: :mad: Hey!

Lilly: -a BACK STABBING VAMPIRE-!

Sithis: :mad: I keep telling you that was an accident!

Lilly: -and a girl.

Sarah: :mad: And what is THAT supposed to mean?!

Lilly: These vile creatures have been eyeing you, Elina, and Miko every time we encounter them. Didn't you notice?

Sarah: Well, considering we've been more or less massacreing them, I would think at least a few would look at us...

Lilly: Those arguments aside, I simply cannot abide the thought of what these foul beasts may be planning during those times.

Tirmek: Are you sure it's not just your dirty, dirty mind acting up? :smirk: :devil:

Lilly: Go away, kitty.

Tirmek: :twitch: (i.h.h.) Must...not...kill him...for that...

Elina: Are you still arguing about who's gonna keep watch?

Sithis: Seems we have some trust issues...

Elina: *groan* Fine. I'll take care of it.

She mumbles something under her breath to someone or something none of them can see. What they hear seems to be incomprehensible jibberish, yet it has an immediate result. Several spectral figures appear out of nowhere. They seem to be composed of several different beings, almost as if they were sewn together out of spare parts.

Elina: I figured out Tira's message not too long ago. I'm able to collect soul memories as I encounter them, and exert some control over them in exchange for sending them on when their task is done. It's a little like a Binder making a Pact, but not exactly.

Tirmek: You want them to keep watch? What could they possibly do?

Elina: The contract is to keep us from harm till we are ready to continue in the morning. After that, I send them on. Everyone wins! :D They may only be memories, but through me they act much like ghosts and other incorporeal beings. They are bound to my word so long as I keep my end. They will not betray us. They can't.

Lilly: *waiving his hand through the spirits* Freaky.

Elina: Be careful. They can drain levels.

Lilly: :eek: *pulls back sharply*

Tirmek: It won't hamper your sleep?

Elina: Not in the least. *turns* Now that that's settled, I'm getting some rest.

Heading over to the girls tent, she pokes her head in just as Miko is coming out.

*ACCIDENTAL "GLOMPH"*

Miko & Elina: :mymy: :eek: :yuck: *pull back*

Elina: *wiping her mouth* EWWWWWW!!! *begins scraping her tongue*

Miko: *has grabbed her toothbrush and is scrubbing vigorously*

Lilly: That was so hot...

Tirmek: *WHACK* :mad:

Lilly: You're just jealous you didn't see most of it.

Elina: :yuck: Ickyickyickyicky!

Miko: *gargling*
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-12-06, 07:52 AM		Miko & Elina: :mymy: :eek: :yuck: *pull back*
Silver: Sigh. :bored: Well there goes that idea.

Sarah: :mad: (ihh Why am I jealous? :confused: )
Kaizer_Ryu

12-12-06, 10:17 AM		Silver: Sigh. Well there goes that idea.
OOC: Or maybe not. :evillaugh

IC:

In the morning, Sarah and Elina prepare to start the day. Miko still sleeps soundly with her :88E: plushie tucked under her arm as she drools on the pillow.

Sarah: Sleep well?

Elina: Yeah...

Sarah: All your spells prepared?

Elina: Uh huh.

Sarah: Spirit things taken care of?

Elina: Yep.

Sarah: Did you like kissing Miko?

Elina: Yes.

Sarah: Ah hah!

Elina: :confused: :eek: Wait, I mean NO!

Sarah: Admit it! You liked it!

Elina: :mad: That was a dirty trick...

Sarah: :smirk: It worked, didn't it?

Elina: :mad: Ok, ok, fine! I did like it! In some weird, twisted part of myself, I did!

Sarah: What was it like?

Elina: :blush: She tastes like cherries...

Miko: :devil: Is that why there was a tongue involved?

Elina: :eek:

Sarah: :eek: You're joking!

Elina: I swear I didn't mean to!

Miko: :rolleyes: Suuuuurrreeeee you didn't...

Sarah: Um... :blush:

Miko: What?

Sarah: ...can I try? :blush:

Elina: SIS!

*outside the tent*

Lilly: (i.h.h.) Score!

*looks around*

Lilly: (i.h.h.) Huh...usually OOKaizer would have put a stop to this by now, yelling something about them being only ten years old. He's either indisposed or something is very wrong...*shrug* Meh. Works for me.

-----

Liam: :uh-huh: Where do you people keep coming from?!

KaizerV3.0: *dressed like this (http://lovmanga.bleublog.ch/files/images/2006/5/450/mob56_1146855331.jpg)* I don't really understand it myself, but now that I'm here, I must gather my party in order to battle the evil of Cruxis! C'mon, Noishe! *A strange dog-like creature runs up to him as he wanders away*

Liam: This is really getting out of hand...
rampant

12-12-06, 11:04 AM		Dorvos - Hmmmmm (looks at his tail) hmmmmm (looks at the babies' tails)

Satnak - Yes They have four each get over it.

Serene - Actually I think he's gloating about his tail being the only one with fangs on it.

Satnak - Very sharp fangs in very sensitive places.

Serene - You really should consider bottle feeding these two.
DungeonJman

12-12-06, 12:18 PM		Lilly: (i.h.h.) Score!

*looks around*

Lilly: (i.h.h.) Huh...usually OOKaizer would have put a stop to this by now, yelling something about them being only ten years old. He's either indisposed or something is very wrong...*shrug* Meh. Works for me.

*walks up to the outside of the camp (not tent, before anyone makes a mistake)*

Well, he's indisposed for the moment, so i'll say it: TEN!!!

Lilly: How'd you hear my thoughts?

The plot requires it, plus i still retain some of my E.B.N.E. powers. I have something important to talk about with this group, so get within tolerable sanity levels in 5 minutes.
Charles Phipps

12-12-06, 01:13 PM		Rose: Now I'd like to share an Order of the Stick Moment about how I nearly got into FF6....

http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0388.html
Chrys

12-12-06, 02:08 PM		Chrys [who is still on auto-plot [tm]] is sitting on the deck, in a deck chair with a coconut filled some purple drink and on less then 20 little paper umbrella.

Aero: Hey lazy –ss have you seen daddy?

Chrys: Oh I sent him to that dragon place to get some eggs… I have killer recipe for an omelet .

Aero: … Hey I’m thinking about the whole Lawful good thing… I don’t think it really me…

Chrys: Found out you mom just became Lord of the sixth didn’t you…

Aero: Yes… but I don’t want to be a spooty blackguard or a Soul born because they both suck more then Lilly.

Chrys: Well I have been make a Centurion class that kinda like a Lawful Evil Paladin…

Aero: You always thought the Rome empire was Lawful Evil didn’t you.

Chrys: It is! If you have a male kid he so getting name Nero…any way if you want to change to that you have to go on one of those quest thingys to change your class and race…

Aero: Like in FF 4… but the opposite? Does that mean I have to take 3 annoy side kicks with me?

Chrys: Yes and yes…

**** Later****

Aero sits at a booth with a sign saying ‘Annoy side kick interviews’

Aero: Next?
rampant

12-12-06, 02:19 PM		Chalky - Whats more annoying than waking up a different color every morning.

---------------------------

Norbaz - Food more deadly than the monsters

--------------------------------

Kithle - :D

--------------------------------

Squishy - I just need some time away from the crazy changeling

-------------------------------

Rose - I need a life
Chrys

12-12-06, 02:27 PM		Aero: Ok I'll take the spider thingy and the bait... I mean captain. The Rest of you can Bugger off!

Silver You want them to do that here then?

Aero Go away I still need to find another person.
Charles Phipps

12-12-06, 02:53 PM		Miko: Well at least I don't have too much to worry about.

*A glowing ghost of Michael appears*

Miko: Gah, it's my dead beat dad.

Michael: Hey Miko!

Miko: Aren't you still alive.

*A glowing Rose appears*

Rose: Mirror Image and Message Spell my dear.

Michael: I've come to share a revelation.

Miko: You're not dating are you?

Rose: Surprisingly, there are some vestiges of heterosexuality onboard this ship.

Michael: It is a tragic day when the ELF is one of the straightest men onboard.

Rose: I don't see how my elfiness has anything to do with being gay.

Michael: Oh come on! You can't get a more limp wristed poof of a race than elves!

Rose: WE ARE PROUD AND MAJESTIC!

Michael: I'm sorry I can't hear you over all the androgynous prancing around in woods!

Rose: OH IT'S ON B****!

*Rose's ghost tackles Michael's ghost*

Ivy: This is what happened when Anakin appeared beside the other Jedi ghosts.

Miko: Did you guys have a message to pass onto me or something?

Michael: Oh yeah, Miko you have to kill Elina

Miko: What?!

Michael: Yeah, sorry.

Miko: But...but...I really like her. Almost as much as Lilly!

***

Terra: *gets sudden heartburn* GAH!

Satnak: What's wrong?

Terra: Some young woman actually likes a man over a woman when given the choice.

Satnak: NO!

***

Michael: Basically, she's the Promise Breaker. The Evil Power that will destroy the world.

Miko:....and?

Michael: Miko....you're not Chaotic Evil.

Miko: What? NO!

Michael: Yes, you see....Saberiel isn't your mother.

Miko: I knew you couldn't figure out where to put it...wait, what?

Michael: Hardy Har Har. Yes, actually I'm fully capable of fathering you. However, Sabriel has an aversion to men

Miko: She's a succubus.

Michael: Yes, apparently the only woman in the world able to love me sexually was Lisa. However, I found an even more sexually depraved woman than the bondage and tentacle porn queen.

Sarah and Elina: GAH! TOO MUCH INFORMATION!

***

Lisa: Achoo.

***

Michael: Yes, your mother is Glaysia.

Miko:.....Who?

Michael: *hands her new supplement on the Nine Hells*

Miko: I'm.....a Devil?

Michael: Yes, Miko, you're LAWFUL evil.

Miko: :devil: You mean I get to lord over everybodies behavior and constantly b**** they're not being lawful enough like a paladin but STILL be treacherous evil?

Michael:.....this is not going to turn out well.
Chrys

12-12-06, 03:10 PM		Aero So thats makes Miko my sister... :twitch:

Chrys Hey no Highlander Jokes! Any she is your younger Half Sister

Aero Really :schemes:
DungeonJman

12-12-06, 03:20 PM		Man, this blackguard is acting more and more evil. That's it, i'm giving the warning smite.

Tirmek: Warning smite

Gaah! Where'd you come from? :confused:

Tirmek: Just woke up, anyway, what's a warning smite?

You may want to put on sunglasses

*drives his sword into the ground smiting everything and giving off a blinding light everywhere within the camp, damaging nothing, but giving a feeling of righteousness, chivalry, and all around goodness, and consecrating the ground (as the spell consecrate)*

Tirmek: I thought you guys didn't have that kind of a budget.

Only Fangblade, besides, i blew up the Dramadars with logic, so they can't take away my SFX budget, plus, if new ones wanted to take it away, they'd need me to be there to sign the forms.
Charles Phipps

12-12-06, 03:23 PM		Aero So thats makes Miko my sister... :twitch:

Chrys Hey no Highlander Jokes! Any she is your younger Half Sister

Aero Really :schemes:

And oddly, I made the decision to make her Glaysia's kid before I saw she was Aero's mom ;-)

Miko: This blows, I wanted to be Belial's grandkid.

OOCharles: Err....the Lord of the Third is head of a family that....sticks together.

Miko: Huh?

OOCharles: Just hear banjo music when you picture them.

Miko: :eek:
Chrys

12-12-06, 04:20 PM		Aero He mean the lord of the Fourth.

Chrys Oh come on like any can tell the lord apart with out a porgram.

Aero Whatever! I'm going to go buy some luggage for Miko to carry around.

Chrys Er...

Aero Oh I'm going to wait to come back to start my quest. So I'm take the spidery thing, The bait, and my younger sister.

Chrys why?

Aero So we can have some Bondage time

Chrys You ment bonding time...

Aero I ment what I said.

*** Elsewhere***

Miko: Does any else have a really bad feeling right now?
DungeonJman

12-12-06, 05:04 PM		Well, based on what Miko said, good thing i took extra smiting twice.

Tirmek: What?

I can smite evil 5 times a day.

Tirmek: Oh.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-12-06, 05:15 PM		OOcat: …………………………………………………………………………………………

Silver: Well?

OOcat: Nope, nothing.

Silver: No witty comment about how screwed up the families/sex lives on this ship are?

OOcat: Nope.

13: No attempt to get Miko to multitask Lilly and Elina while simlutaneously pointing out to Miko that she's interested in the very person she hates in the future, all the while giving Sarah this inexplicable jelousy due to the Fury going after the Shadow?

OOcat: Nope.

Bunny: I hope you plan on continuing the adventures of the 8-braincell crew.

OOcat: Later.
rampant

12-12-06, 05:25 PM		Tirmek - Ok People Ready to go?

Lily - Pack pack pack pack away the gear!

Elina - You know there's no skill checks here right? whats more despite being Elan you don't have that ability.

Liliy - I wanted to feel useful:weep:

Tirmek - Elan go play the quiet game.

Ivy - Thats cold Tirmek, Roy, whatever.

Tirmek - My alignment says good, not nice!

Miko - Great I bet it says lawful, not trustworthy as well?

Tirmek - No just good, incarnate is one alignment. Moral questions are much simpler when ethics doesn't matter.
Charles Phipps

12-12-06, 07:03 PM		DungeonJman: At last, I can now reveal the information of life threatening importance to you all.

Rose: Hey, D-J, have you seen Amish Ishmael?

DungeonJman: NOT NOW! Wait....Amish Ishmael?

Rose: Yes, after ten long years of flying this vessel, we finally ran out of Redshirts. Now, we're removing alternates of Ishmael to fill the crew.

DungeonJman: Uh...huh.

Amish Ishmael: My churn hash been shtolen!

Rose: Listen, I need 40 gallons by Thursday or its your head.

DungeonJman: Oh no, not another parody! I just got done...

Amish Ishmael: Nein! Nein! My Churn hash been shtolen!

Rose: What, your Churn?

Admiral Jarlot: What's going on?

Rose: No butter can be made!

*Admiral Jarlot looks at the carton of butter in his hands*

Admiral Jarlot: What!? No butter! What am I going to do? This ones capped!

DungeonJman: We have bigger problems than a Butter shortage!

Admiral Jarlot: He's right...and I never thought I'd say that.

DungeonJman: Thank you.

Admiral Jarlot: Someone has stolen the Jarlot mobile!

Rose: Well it's obvious D-J did it.

DungeonJman: What? I'm a paladin!

Rose: All the better to divert suspicion!

Admiral Jarlot: You're guilty, I can smell it on you.

*D-J smacks his face*
Paulon

12-12-06, 07:15 PM		There is a crashing sound as something long, green, and cartoonish smashes through the wall and into DungeonJman, knocking him to the floor. The apparition shouts "D.J., You dirty guy!" before looking down, muttering "Whoops! No sea!" and getting yanked out of the scene by a shepherd's crook.
DungeonJman

12-12-06, 07:21 PM		Ouch, so much pain.... anyway, why don't you try looking for Amish Dave, he can probably lend you his butter churn or something, and are you sure that all of the Bat-Jarlots are gone? I really don't have time for this!
urial angel of death

12-12-06, 08:10 PM		Aero So we can have some Bondage time

Chrys You ment bonding time...

Aero I ment what I said.


Squishy: I feel a sudden and very strange mix of greed, cruelty, and a slight bit of lust. Wait that mean's there is a potintial product,:D and by that last feeling a very high priced one.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-12-06, 08:43 PM		OOC: I really think you just need to get on with it. Things are starting to get way out of hand on my end.

DungeonJ: How so?

-----

Cloud, Crono, Vyse, Fox McCloud, Alucard (both Castlvania and Hellsing variants), Naruto, and Vash the Stampede versions of Kaizer are seen wandering about the world of Eberron.

-----

DungeonJ: Oh.

OOC: It gets worse. You know that whole scene where Sarah was a bit too interested in kissing another girl?

DungeonJ: Yeah, that was a little much.

OOC: I have lost control over my myriad Plot Devices, spoken and unspoken. Keeping the two girls mostly uninterested in kissing and whatnot was one of them. There are plenty more, and several have fallen apart. Most won't have any immediate consequences, and with a little luck, none of them will have any permenant impact, but the longer my avatar stays out of commission, the worse it gets. So get a move on!
Charles Phipps

12-12-06, 08:45 PM		OOCharles: You know, I have NO idea what's currently going on relationship or plot wise.

Jarlot: It took you THIS long to have that happen?

OOCharles: Whoever can explain it gets to be Captain for a day.
DungeonJman

12-12-06, 08:47 PM		Look, your OOC is what controls them, not me or your avatar, so i have to make sure they're listening and getting responses from them in order to get this over with as fast as possible.
Charles Phipps

12-12-06, 08:49 PM		Jarlot: Alright, that's it. All of you entities, OFF MY SHIP.

Rose: It's actually my ship.

Jarlot: Quiet Rikker! Haven't you people got lives? Girlfriends!? Damnit people, go get one if you don't have! Stop throwing your quasi omnipotent might around here.

DungeonJman: I have an important messa....

Jarlot: And you....NO ONE GETS A BIGGER SWORD THAN ME!

MST team: What about us?

Jarlot: You can stay. From now on, Entities are restricted to the Movie Theatre and Narration.

Rose: what if they don't.

Jarlot: Then we lock them in the room with the Old Dwarven Lady.

OOCharles: Does this include....

****

Old Dwarven Lady: Hello Laddie...

OOCharles: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
DungeonJman

12-12-06, 08:52 PM		Three technicalities, one i'm not actually on the ship, two the sword isn't bigger, it's just powerful, and three, as of this moment, i'm not really an entity, but a semi-entity player character.
Charles Phipps

12-12-06, 08:54 PM		OOC: BTW, do tell me if we're getting a bit overbearing Djman. I know you wanted to get to your plot.

Jarlot: I'm sorry, is that arguing with the Captain?

***

OOCharles: Hey.

DungeonJman: *sigh* I just want to save the world.

*helps the Dwarven Lady knit*
Paulon

12-12-06, 08:54 PM		Jarlot: You can stay. From now on, Entities are restricted to the Movie Theatre and Narration.

*Jarlot is immediately buried in tons of peanuts thrown by the lurker EBNEs in the peanut gallery*
Kaizer_Ryu

12-12-06, 09:03 PM		Look, your OOC is what controls them, not me or your avatar, so i have to make sure they're listening and getting responses from them in order to get this over with as fast as possible.
OOC: Actually, that is incorrect. They do what they want, I just type it. My avatar is the part of me that can directly influence them, and even then, it's like an advanced Command spell. By taking out my avatar, you have more or less given my characters free reign.

Sarah: :mad: If it means we get to move on with the spoof, then just say whatever it is you want to say.

Elina: :mad: It doesn't mean we'll take anything to heart or even take you seriously, but we'll listen.

Tirmek: :mad: So get on with it.

Tim the Enchanter: Yes, get on with it!

Legion of Knights atop a hill: GET ON WITH IT!

DungeonJ: *anime sweatdrop*
DungeonJman

12-12-06, 09:03 PM		*reappears at the camp*

Wow, how did i get out of there

*flashback shows DungepnJ jumping out of the window*

[Cheesy Red Mage Logic] Oh and since i forgot about how high up i was then, i don't take any damage [/Cheesy Red Mage Logic]

Anyway, since i'm here, i might as well dispense with the help. The thing itself is not so important, considering that Miko and Lilly know about it, but the short version is that as a E.B.N.E. i saw terrible things resulting from your desire to be better than anyone else, Elina, which took you over in Droaam and when you attacked Miko on the ship. As opposed to what everyone else suggests, the best way to stop this is to let you face it once and for all, and i can help you face it if you are ready.
Charles Phipps

12-12-06, 09:14 PM		Elina: Huh?

Lilly: Oh, he's just warning her about the fact that there's a horrible evil influence inside you that has to be confronted and destroyed.

Elina: What's that about Twinkies?

Lilly: This spell is fun.

Elina: What spell?

Lilly: In any case, thanks for the warning. We'll get to the apocolyptical scene set up now.

Miko: Let's just hope she doesn't beat it with love. I hate that.

***

A month later

*Sailor Elina stands over Tuxedo Lilly whom has been horribly wounded*

Sailor Elina: EVIL QUEEN ELINA! IN THE NAME OF SIBERYS I WILL PUNISH YOU!
rampant

12-12-06, 09:17 PM		Tirmek - Miko

Miko - *smite good*

DungeonJ is blasting off again.
DungeonJman

12-12-06, 09:21 PM		*stands unaffected by the smite good*
Uh, about 10 times more health than you?

Ok, the thing is edited until Kaizer gives the thumbs up, or otherwise, disregard this post.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-12-06, 09:46 PM		Stupid comes across the sign advertising the Light Warrior job.

Stupid: Yes! That's exactly what we need as a hero team: a quest of epic importance! Bonding as companions! Plumbing inner depths of both the world and ourselves A chance to right wrongs and fight evil!

Nalfein: What's this about fighting evil?

Stupid: Nalfein! But aren't you still supposed to be looking for that old man to thank him for telling us about the cave we never visited in return for all our gold?

Nalfein: :mad: You just had to bring that up, didn't you?

Stupid: But that doesn't matter because look: we can be Light Warriors and save the world! It's just so us because we're heroes and its heroing!

Nalfein: Would you stop exclaiming everything?

Stupid: Sorry.

Nalfein: And what's all this nonsense about heroes? We're pirates off the Forgotten Freedom looking for work because a certain replacement captain doesn't have us steal enough to meet basic needs.

Stupid: What are you talking about? We make enough to buy all the swords we could ever need.

Nalfein: ……………………………There must be something in your race description that implies you can't suffer brain damage. But listen, if you can find two more pathetic suckers willing to lay their lives on the line fighting hordes of mind-altering abberations of nature, then we can try out for the job.

Stupid: Well, actually………

Nalfein: Wait a minute, what am I saying, this is the Forgotten Freedomverse, I've crewed with these people.

Stupid: Funny you should mention that……

Cloud: I can help. I've got the experience.

Nalfein (carcastic): And what can you do, phallic hair?

Cloud: (elaborate transformation sequence)

Nalfein: *waiting*

Cloud (chocobo): *Bwark!*

Nalfein: *flaming sphere!*

Cloud: (cartoon-style roasted bird with little paper booties)

Nalfein: That'll keep 'em away.

Stupid: You see, I already found one—

Nalfein: Yeah, yeah, I'll be right back. (ihh Must find Linda……:love:)
Charles Phipps

12-12-06, 09:52 PM		OOC: With all due respect Djman, Kaizer has worked very hard on his plotline and you really shouldn't attempt to involve yourself in a plotline he's built up for very long.

Bluntly, I'd like to request that last post be nullified. Elina is Kaizer's character and you really shouldn't be involving yourself to this degree in his plotline.

Of course, if Kaizer wants to do it, then don't I have egg on my face but I've tried to drop hints that this is sort of his thing. Your stuff is very good and I'm enjoying it tremendously but this is sort of a thing I'm working out with Kaizer.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-12-06, 09:56 PM		i saw terrible things resulting from your desire to be better than anyone else, Elina, which took you over in Droaam and when you attacked Miko on the ship.
OOC: I hate to break it to you, but that's not what/how/why that happened.

IC:

Elina: Hey, cool! A shadow doppleganger!

Shadow Elina: *raised eyebrow* Seriously, I'm your dark side? How lame is that?

Elina: *shrug* I guess I don't really have one.

Shadow Elina: Ok then. *melds back into Elina*

Tirmek: Can we get on with this now, please?!

Sarah: :nonono: All that hype for something completely pointless.

Elina: :( And I'm still in the dark as to what happened.

Kitsune: (in Elina's head) Don't they realize all this interference could end up making things worse?

Elina: (i.h.h.) I get the fact that something bad is supposed to happen in the future, and I'm at the center of it... I just don't understand how something like that could happen... I don't want to hurt anyone unjustly... :weep:
Charles Phipps

12-12-06, 09:58 PM		OOC: *bows* I stand corrected Kaizer.
DungeonJman

12-12-06, 10:03 PM		Well, since all of this has gone to moot, i'll be going to find something to do until i can get out, but i really wish you hadn't done that, considering that was the shadow's avatar in your form, not a doppelganger. But first things first, i have to wake up OOKaizer

*begins to leave*
Kaizer_Ryu

12-12-06, 10:07 PM		Well, since all of this has gone to moot, i'll be going to find something to do until i can get out, but i really wish you hadn't done that, considering that was the shadow's avatar in your form, not a doppelganger.
Shadow: *raised eyebrow* You? Drive me out?

...

...

...

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But seriously, do you even know if I'm there in the first place? It was never stated as such, even OOC, so you don't. :P
Charles Phipps

12-12-06, 10:10 PM		OOCharles: My confusion as to what exactly is happening only grows..

Rose: Meh, back to parodying the Stick and 8bit.
DungeonJman

12-12-06, 10:12 PM		Well, since you're here now

*turns off the brilliant energy, and the holy, and lightning blast parts of the blade turn on as he (attempts to) smites the Shadow* note: mainly symbolic.

This one is greater than you, even if she is destined to be your avatar, as all of them will be greater. For while you hold sway over us normal mortals, the ones who achieve greatness become more than just shadows and dust.

*leaves and heads to Liam's workshop*

Uh, i think you can let OOKaizer wake up now, and you *points to the squirrel* can let him go*

Liam: THANK YOU!!! *runs out at an incredibly fast speed*

Squirrel: *runs out with the gun that shoots, etc.*

Uh-oh.
Charles Phipps

12-12-06, 10:18 PM		Lilly: Gee, thanks.

DungeonJman: Well it's no...

Lilly: THE ONLY WAY I CAN DATE ELINA IS IF I SAVE HER FROM AN ELABORATELY CONTRIVED EVIL!

*Elina snuggles DJman's leg*

Lilly: Grrrr.

;-)
urial angel of death

12-12-06, 10:24 PM		OOC: If I misspell names or last names, just assume that over thousands of years and many reincarnations the names changed atleast slightly. Yes that's why. I could remember them if I tried. I could! :weep:

IC: Terra Bradford stood next to her professor and friend Terrek (think OOUrial think, umm) Goober. They were looking at one of the most important archeological find in recent history. It was the Nameless City. It had been covered with sand for thousands of years. A year or two ago none of this would have been possible. Just eighteen months ago an eccentric old man named Kanatash Hammond had approached them and offered twelve million dollars a year the in return for oppertunity to study any of the Mythos artifacts they found.

Terrek: Terra stop day-dreaming and pay attention. Our sponsor is on the phone. He wants to talk to you.
DungeonJman

12-12-06, 10:26 PM		Hey, you're going to save her anyway, at least if my meddling hasn't done anything. Oh, and if you want this plot to have any challenge, you better let your evil duplicate out.

*attempts to try and walk away, which is hard, considering Elina is still holding on to his leg*

DungeonJ: I'm sorry if this sounds rude, but can you please let go? Uh and what are we going to do with the squirrel with the ONE TRUE "GUN THAT SHOOTS LASER SWORDS WITH GUNS ON THEM THAT SHOOT OTHER LASER SWORDS", that is now on the loose? Unless we get Ash back as the psionic, fireball shooting, ninja pirate that rides a dinosaur, and have him blow up in an extremely awesome explosion with the sword, which neither I nor Ash are willing to allow (remember, the sword was created as a result of Ash achieving that state of awesomeness), there's no way to get rid of it.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-12-06, 10:36 PM		OOC: Just a nit pick (can't help it): She's supposed to be his Champion, not avatar.

IC:

Meanwhile, in OOKaizer's mind:

Kirk-OOKaizer: Mr. Scott! Damage Report!

Big Fat Scottie-OOKaizer: It's no good, Captain! The Warp Core's been hit! I dinnae think it'll last, and thae ejection mechanism's been damaged!

Kirk-OOKaizer: :confused: Since when do we have a Warp Core?

Big Fat Scottie-OOKaizer: Uh...ah mean power's nearly been restored. Again.

Kirk-OOKaizer: Is the Breaker still out there? I'm not sure how much more we can take.

Sulu-OOKaizer: Without power, I cannot estimate Shield strength or detect whether our enemy is still waiting in ambush.

Uhura-OOKaizer: I'm receiving no transmissions on backup power, Captain.

Kirk-OOKaizer: Mr. Spock, your analysis.

Spock-OOKaizer: As far as a restart, our course of action is unclear, Captain. However, we may want to check on some of our more sensitive cargo.

Kirk-OOKaizer: Yes, we must be certain none of the horrors aboard escape into the universe. It could have drastic consequences. Bones! Take Mr. Chekov and a contingent of Redsh-I mean Yeoman's down to the holding bay.

"Bones" McCoy-OOKaizer: Dammit, Jim! I'm a Doctor, not an errand boy!

Chekov-OOKaizer: *salutes* Aye, Captin.

-----

Chekov-OOKaizer: *comlink* Captin! We have a problem.

Kirk-OOKaizer: Is it The Room?

Chekov-OOKaizer: No, Captin. The Room is secure. It's much worse.

Kirk-OOKaizer: Oh no...

The door to the "Possible Incarnations" room is hanging off it's hinges. One of the cages is torn apart, and many of the goody-goody versions of the Kaizer characters are rocking back and forth slowly in their cages.

Chekov-OOKaizer: Aye, Captin. They're gone...
DungeonJman

12-12-06, 10:42 PM		For the record, i said, possesed by his avatar, not meaning that she was his avatar, but anyway that's irrelevant. I'll help you with the regathering of your incarnations, seeing as i caused the mess, but afterwards, i gotta take care of the gun.

Naruto incarnation's pretty simple. Just say, "Hey Sasuke's right behind you!" then get him back into your head when he turns around.
Charles Phipps

12-12-06, 10:51 PM		OOC: If I misspell names or last names, just assume that over thousands of years and many reincarnations the names changed atleast slightly. Yes that's why. I could remember them if I tried. I could! :weep:

IC: Terra Bradford stood next to her professor and friend Terrek (think OOUrial think, umm) Goober. They were looking at one of the most important archeological find in recent history. It was the Nameless City. It had been covered with sand for thousands of years. A year or two ago none of this would have been possible. Just eighteen months ago an eccentric old man named Kanatash Hammond had approached them and offered twelve million dollars a year the in return for oppertunity to study any of the Mythos artifacts they found.

Terrek: Terra stop day-dreaming and pay attention. Our sponsor is on the phone. He wants to talk to you.

I'm really enjoying your future thing here btw urial.
DungeonJman

12-12-06, 10:59 PM		Why is everyone so focused on the future? Why not worry about the here and now? That's why oracles are ahead of their time, because they don't live in it!
urial angel of death

12-12-06, 11:09 PM		OOC: Sorry if you don't like it. I just love epilogues to books or video games, and therefore make some here. Another thing is that it allows you to do massive things that would upset people if done now, but if done in simply one possible future it is less disruptive.
Paulon

12-12-06, 11:11 PM		Because it gives them a chance to put their characters into situations which simply don't make sense for them to encounter even by the standards of the Forgotten Freedom and see how they react?

For example with the Jurassic Park parody mentioned, it would be pointless in the 'normal' FF Eberron because (1) Dinosaurs are alive and well there already, and (2) the Ubers and probably even the kids working as a team could rip the legs and jaws off a T-Rex and roast it for lunch without problems. Using reincarnations in a future time gets around any objections regarding setting feasibility and power level. Besides, it's just fun to watch.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-12-06, 11:15 PM		OOC: The "Possible Incarnations" room is for characters only. It contains what could be considered to be alternates of the current characters now in existence. As for the alternates of myself, that's just my inner Otaku manifesting in different fashions. Now that my avatar is (almost) back up to speed, it won't take long to take care of them.

OOKaizer: Oh...my head...

OOC: Oh, good, you're up.

OOKazier: :eek: :hides:

OOC: The Breaker's gone.

OOKaizer: *whew* Good. Now to restore my Plot Devices to full strength! *flash of light* All right, that should do it. But I'll have to keep an eye out for damage and leaks resulting from that.

OOC: We know "They" escaped.

OOKaizer: Yeah. That'll come back to bite us once the plot demands it. I'm more concerned about the other ones.

-----

Elina & Sarah: *in tandem* I suddenly find myself much less interested in you.

Miko: :mad: (i.h.h.) Dammit! So close to my vengeance!

-----

OOKaizer: Ok, that one's taken care of. The rest'll take a while to confirm their integrity.

OOC: It's always nothing but work, work, work once you get back from a rest, isn't it?

OOKaizer: *sigh* This is why I have to be coerced into taking vacations...
urial angel of death

12-12-06, 11:28 PM		OOC: Who said I was using dinos for my parody. :D Even so you explained the reasoning far better than I did.

IC: Speaker: Private flight 23 will be delayed for another two hours.

Nalfien cursed quietly under his breath. It was bad enough that the geezer demanded a visit and lived thousands of miles away, but now the airlines were against him to.
Still there was something about the old man that Nalfien wanted to learn about. He had faint memories of a figure named Kanatash. Images of a man in a labcoat a ghostly phantom, and numerous others flooded into Nalfien's head whenever he saw his current employer. They must have something to do with his past.
Nalfien's memories did not work like those of a normal person, and neither did his body for that matter.He was dead but didn't pass on or rot away, and he knew deep down inside of him that the little golden book he carried with him was the reason. It kept him from ever being destroyed, knive wounds were always glancing, bullets only winged him, and the passing of eons berely aged him a day. He could also make anything that was possible happen. This was not to say he could do anything, far from it, but he did have extrodinary powers. For instance he couldn't create a ball of fire, but he could cause a gas main to explode with nothing more than a thought. As for his memory, he couldn't ever remeber any family or childhood. His recollections just went about fifty years back and trailed off.
He could find out some things by reading the books in his library. He knew had written most of them and it allowed him to get farther into the past, but slowly as the books got old the languages they were written in changed. Some of the more ancient volumes were completely indecipherable.

Speaker: Private flight 23 now boarding.

Nalfien: Well I'll be damned. Time really does fly.
DungeonJman

12-12-06, 11:39 PM		Meh, i'm pretty sure that the squirrel won't cause too much damage. So, i'd better find something to do.

*walks off to find something decent to do, but meanwhile in the lower decks*

Nobby: Well, this stinks, my own entity hasn't been able to concentrate on me because of his messing with OOKaizer's plots, i don't know what to do.

*suddenly, a giant horde of squirrels led by the squirrel with the OTGTSLSWGOTTSOLS charges into battle right in front of him against the half-biscuits*

Squirrel: Squeekeer! (For the Empire!)

Nobby: *startled and backing away* Ok, i'll stop asking.
rampant

12-12-06, 11:48 PM		Tirmek - Hey Guys!

Sarah - Ready

Elina - Maybe a nice dex booster

Ivy - I like wand of disintigrate

Sithis - I do so love the smell of death in the morning.

Miko - Finally some action.

Lily - Huh? whats going on... I failed another spot check didn't i:(

Goblin ninja - Wow no duh einstein.

Liliy - Huh? I think i just failed a listen check.

Goblin ninja - Not this kid again.
rwarner3701

12-13-06, 09:27 AM		Alkran: Well the party started normal enough. There was food and booze... you even got a few presents.

The scene fades once again changing into the image of a bright sun.

Alkran: Nice dissolve.

FXDemon: Thanks, sure beats working for most of the other entities with their flashy effects.


----
The camera pans down to the deck of the Forgotten Freedom where the party is in full swing. Jarlot is already stumbling around even more drunk than normal as Chalky approaches dragging a bundle.

Chalky: Happy birthday Jarlot.

Jarlot: Gee thanks Chalky... Is that for me?

Chalky: Yeah, I got you a narrator for your birthday, but I couldn't resist chewing a little on the way here.

Chalky produces the narrator who is cowering in fear and missing most of his left foot. Jarlot leans down and whispers into the narrator’s ear.

Narrator: Are you serious I have some standards... I studied Shakespeare.

Jarlot: I can give you back to Chalky.

Narrator: :twitch: ...fine.

Narrator: Suddenly dozens of beautiful women rush out to see to Jarlot’s every need.

Jarlot: :D It's just what I always wanted.


----
Back in the present

Jarlot: Well that was awesome but what happened to my narrator?

Alkran: That's a good question...


----
Jarlot stumbles out of Dooj's room wrapped in a bed sheet with a look of terror on his face. He sees the Narrator he got the night before sitting on the floor waiting for him.

Jarlot: Can your narrations control me?

Narrator: Well you belong to many entities so you have to want to be controlled.

Jarlot: That won't be a problem for the moment, here is what I need you to do.

Jarlot whispers into Narrator's ear and then stands up and prepares himself to follow the suggestions of the pseudo-entity.

Narrator: After stumbling out of someone's room Jarlot begins to run a crazed look in his eye. He runs until he no longer can then falls to the ground in a corner weeping. When he comes back to his senses he can't seem to remember what he was running from or why he is only wearing a bed sheet. He quickly decides it isn't important and heads off to Erk's Place to catch up on the drinking he seems to be missing out on. He has completely forgotten everything that happened so far that morning... and the present Chalky game him last night.

Narrator: Finally I am free!!

Narrator: Narrator hobbles down the hall making his way to Mickey's office to get his foot healed so he can be on his way.


----
Back in the present

Jarlot: That sneaky bastard.

Alkran: Tricked by an NPC that has to hurt.

Jarlot: I feel dirty inside. So what else happened at this party?

Alkran: Well it went on like most parties do until people started to pass out.

Jarlot: From the booze?

Alkran: Kind of but it seemed to be far to early, you know almost no one on the ship has a low tolerance for alcohol but they were still passing out after only a few drinks.

Jarlot: So what did we do?

Alkran: Well most of the people that didn't feel to far above helping others were more than a little drunk so we called in some detectives...


----
The Hardly Boys two young whippersnappers with a knack for solving mysteries. The Hardly Boys in the mystery of the powerful booze.

Alkran: They didn't really work out... said something about a raging clue grabbed a couple of bottles of booze and wandered off, so we found someone else.


----
Spoony Doony Doo,Where are you
We got some work to do

Spoony Doony Doo, Where are you
We need some help from you now

Come on,Spoony Doo,I see you
pretending you got a sliver

But you're not foolin' me, cause I can see
the way you shake and shiver

You know we got a mystery to solve and Spoony Doo,
be ready for your act
Don't hold back!

And Spoony Doo if you come through you're gonna have
yourself a
Spoony Snack!

Spoony Doony Doo, where are you
You're ready and you're willing

If we can count on you Spoony Doo
I know you'll catch that villian

Standing in a group near one of the walls is Tirmek, wearing a blue and white ascot, Sarah, dressed in purple, Elina, wearing a pair of glasses, Lilly, for some reason on all fours, and Gregory, with a rough goatee and a green shirt.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-13-06, 09:38 AM		Standing in a group near one of the walls is Tirmek, wearing a blue and white ascot, Sarah, dressed in purple, Elina, wearing a pair of glasses, Lilly, for some reason on all fours, and Gregory, with a rough goatee and a green shirt.
OOcat: Sorry, sorry, that just doesn't work unless the Wild Card is a non-humanoid.

OORwarner: Wild Card?

OOcat: There's actually a game system somewhere for Scooby-Doo-type mystery gaming.

OORwarner: RPG people are fanatical, aren't they.

OOcat: Truely. Anyway, this will only take a second—

FX Demon: *overly complex effects transformation sequence*

Lilly is now a dog…………of some sort.

Everyone looks down at him.

OOcat: Huh. Apparently spoonyness translates in dogs as small and yippy.

Lilly: Yipyipyipyipyipyipyipyipyipyipyipyipyipy ipyipyip!

Quench: Rrrrrrr. ;)

Lilly: Ret re rout rof rhere!
DungeonJman

12-13-06, 12:32 PM		i.h.h.

Law-Inclination of DungeonJ: You know, you didn't tell Lilly the whole story.

DungeonJ: About him killing Elina? I thought it best not to tell him, besides everything i said was true, so i didn't lie

Law-Inclination: darn it! *walks over to Good_Inclination* So i guess i owe you $20.

Good-Inclination: :D

Evil-Inclination: No fair, i almost got to manifest in the real world!

DungeonJ: Be quiet, or else you're going into the Containment Chamber.

Good-Inclination: I've never been there, is it like OOKaizer's Room?

Law-Inclination: No, it's different, the place is essentially powered by Daanvi, meaning that anything, even a being infiltrating his/our mind, that goes there, gets trapped inside a grouping of arcane wards, where it is broken into its component elements (Good, Law,Chaos, Evil, Neutrality) and those seperate elements are put away in storage.

Evil-Inclination: i'll be good. :(
rampant

12-13-06, 12:39 PM		Tirmek - Is this almost done? We have school remember.

Sarah - Speaking of which I got my skife permit before we left.

--------------------------------

Terra - Why do I feel sick?
----------------------------------

Sarah - First in the class. Next year I'll have the trophy for the three year league.

TIrmek - I still have 2 more years there good luck getting past me.

Elina - Tournament season starts next week.

Sithis - I've already entered us in seperate divisions.

Elina - Forgotten Freedom for the Final Four.
Gladius_Lucix

12-13-06, 02:03 PM		Liam: So, where are you going?

OOGladius is carrying a suitcase and walking towards the door to leave.

OOGladius: Family stuff. I'll be back in while.

Liam: So, I have the time off?

OOGladius: Unless another entity wants to use you.

Liam: Grr...

----

OOC: No internet over the Christmas break, unfortunately. :(
DungeonJman

12-13-06, 03:14 PM		* a halfling redshirt walks into Aundair*

Guard: Halt, who are you and what is your buisness

Redshirt: Well, i'm a crew member of the Forgotten Freedom, and i'm here to...

Guard: THE FORGOTTEN FREEDOM?!?! RUN AWAY!!!

*the guard runs away, and within 20 minutes, all of Aundair surrenders to the redshirt, who now proclaims himself the new king of Aundair*

Official Royal Pronouncer of Aundair: And what is your name, sire?

redshirt: Pepin

ORPA: All hail King Pepin the Short

Pepin: I'M NOT THAT SHORT!!!
Lord Kale Fangblade

12-13-06, 03:47 PM		Terreks Realm.

A portal Tears open in the Centre of the Streets. from it step forward four pit fiends, wearing equisitely designed black armour. they set up positions around the portal, their eyes sweeping the enhabitance for threats.
then from the portal strides another figure, he appears as a black scaled pit fiend. across his scales red runes glow with crimson light. his eyes are pits of darkness, he also wears black armour, but this suit of armour is lined with gold and of a far supierior design. a crimson cloak is fastened over his broad shoulders. his bearing shows grace beyond his appearance as he looks around him.
behind the pit fiend is a sombre black clad figure. his suit is black, his shirt is black, his tie is black but his skin in contrast is as white as snow. as is his hair and his eyes. in his right hand is clasped a suit case. he reaches up and adjusts his glasses.

the black scaled pit fiend turns to him and leans down. he whispers into the figures ear. the figure nods and steps forwards.

Black Clad Figure: My Master and Employer, Drasskarr, has entered this realm to discuss the ownership of a soul with Mr... *removes a note from his pocket* Terrek.
rampant

12-13-06, 03:57 PM		OOC : Very :heehee: Dungeon
------------------------------------------------

Satnak - Simple answer there Go away.

Demon Lawyer - Now see here

Satnak - Serene Take the kids and get Wescal.

Demon Lawyer - This is why I wanted to use the direct route! I was trying to avoid him!
DungeonJman

12-13-06, 07:13 PM		DungeonJ: Well, if anyone needs me, i'll be in Shavarat, because as of this moment, that''s the best place where I can fight evil.

Rose: Why Shavarat?

DungeonJ: It was Shavarat, Breland, or Darguun, but there is no one better to give Darguun to, and King Steve finally allowed elections, so i have to see if the new King is worse.

*meanwhile in Breland*

King Steve: I must prepare for the campaigning for the upcoming election.

Royal Advisor: But this is a monarchy sir, who will you be running against

King Steve: There's a length of string which has been coveting my job, and i need to beat it in the election

Royal Advisor: *groan*

*back on the airship*

So, that's why i picked Shavarat

*leaves and heads to the gate of Xabra*

Are you sure this thing is safe?

Gnome Wizard: Sure, safe as can be *starts pressing symbols on the gate, before it starts glowing* Quick, the Stargate has opened, go through it now!

Ooookaaay. *walks through*
rampant

12-13-06, 09:04 PM		Tirmek - Ok thats it I gotta get home bye guys.

Sarah - See you tomorrow!

Elina - later

Sithis - till we meet again

Miko - Good riddance

Lily - *happy dance*

Ivy - good bye Tirmek!
-------------------------------------------

Demons - ...

Satnak - ...

lawyer - This is stu-

Satnak - Move and die.

Lawyer - *freeze*
Kaizer_Ryu

12-13-06, 09:53 PM		OOC: Ok, this is before rampant's post.

OOKaizer: Ok, since you've got school soon, I'm gonna speed this along. We'll flesh out what happens later.

Sarah: :bored: You're finally awake?

OOKaizer: If I'm not, this is the worst dream migrane ever. Stupid Breaker...

*scene of the group meeting their evil opposites led by Lilly's evil twin brother*

*scene of them being fooled into helping them activate three sigils and receive a mystical talisman capable of controlling the 2nd ed monsters trapped in the pit beneath the altar where the talisman was kept*

*scene where the group is betrayed, kicks some ass, breaks the talisman, and continues on after killing Sithis's double, getting Ivy's double arrested for copyright infringement, causing Elina's double to run away crying, severely wounding Sarah's double and causing her to retreat, capturing Lilly and Tirmek's double, then sending them to prison escorted by a hot Fey with an affection for blue*

Elina: Laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazy...

OOKaizer: :mad: You try being hit with a gun beyond comprehension a dozen times and still have the ability to create plot! Besides, it can be fleshed out through flashbacks.

Elina: Like how I made out with my double?

OOKaizer: :doh: Yes...like that.

Elina: She was cute and all, but too much of a flake.

Lilly: :eek: That's what took you so long to get back?!

Elina: Wasn't as good a kisser as Miko, either.

OOKaizer: :nonono: I see we've reached the "rebellious" phase.

Sarah: What do you expect? We physically age like a half-elf till maturity, but mentally age like an Outsider. How old are we mentally and emotionally now?

OOKaizer: Human equivalent...about 14, maybe 15.

Sarah: See? Jerk. :pbbbtt:

OOC: Seriously. My brain has shut down for the moment. Could someone do a scene or two, please?
Charles Phipps

12-13-06, 10:03 PM		OOC: Sure, in an hour I'll do no less than 3 large posts.

:-)
Charles Phipps

12-13-06, 10:20 PM		OOC: I want to apologize to Kaizer Ryu for taking so long with this but basically I've been focused entirely on finishing my book and given that it's not really FINISHING, I haven't had time for my usual posts.

IC:

Tirmek: Okay, our final bit of business before we can defeat Mordain Fleshweaver is that we have to break the three seals on the great dungeon in order to be able to pass the Wall of Force that protects him.

Elina: Can't we just dig under it?

Tirmek: No.

Elina: Darnit.

Tirmek: Now, the first thing we've got to handle is to find the secret doorway.

Ivy: Let's try that way!

*points to a sign that says 'Secret Doorway'*

Tirmek: Mordain is now officially mocking us.

*They opened the next door to reveal then an alternate party*

Thorn: AT LAST! MY ARCHNEMESIS REVEALS HIMSELF!

Lilly: Huh?

Thorn: IT IS I! THORN! YOUR ANTI-MATTER UNIVERSE COUNTERPART!

Elina: Wouldn't that destroy the planet the momment you came into our universe.

Thorn: According to silly things like science, yes.

Elina: Okay.

Thorn: In my universe the Remembered Freedom is a home of good and purity across the devatsated realms and I as the son of the Cleric Black Rose am his mad conquest ridden son out to RULE ALL CREATION!

Miko: Oddly, I don't find you attractive in the slightest.

*A half-Deva girl flutters over, in a schoolgirl outfit*

Ichigo: HI!

Thorn: This is my girlfriend.

Ichigo: Good is so much fun!

Miko: Urge...to...kill...rising.

Tirmek: Well at least we don't have any stupid dopplegangers.

Doog Junior: Tiger smell nice!

Tirmek: GAH!

Catgirl 1#: Rowr.

Catgirl 2#: Meow.

Elina: I feel cheated.

Ivy: I feel left out.

Scar: Alphonso Elric?

Ivy: Damnit, another out of work Anime Actor used to replace me.

Sarah: What the hell are those?

Thorn: Your completely heterosexual fun alternate doubles! They're Druids both and spend most of their time high on catnip.

Sarah: I need to see my agent.

Lilly: The only way to resolve this is to either repent of your evil ways or be destroyed!

Thorn: Alright, I repent and fully intend to help you defeat the evil of Mordain.

Lilly: YAY! GLAD TO HAVE YOU FIGHT AT OUR SIDE!

Tirmek: *groan*
DungeonJman

12-13-06, 10:36 PM		* A note flutters down from a portal from Shavarath*

Lilly: What the heck is that?

Tirmek: Picks it up and reads it:

"Attention, Heroes, there is no Mordain the Fleshweaver, because as a part of that failed attempt to change the future, he ended up turning to dust as a result of his own machine backfiring."

OOCharles: *teleports to Shavarath before hitting DungeonJ over the head* Idiot! Now we can't make anymore OOTS jokes, because our Xykon is dead!

DungeonJ: Well, i honestly expected for my plot to last a little bit longer than it did. You guys didn't want me altering the future, so it was cut short.

OOCharles: You could have at least not told them that he was dead!

DungeonJ: *winces as OOCharles keeps hitting over the head*
I'm..ow..really..ow..sorry! Ow!
Charles Phipps

12-13-06, 10:57 PM		OOCharles: Oh well, I apologize really DungeonJman. I'll make sure that you can instead save Lilly from the horrid fate I have in store for him.

Lilly: What?

OOCharles: Quiet you.

***

Lilly: In any case, this is obviously a clever trick.

Sarah: But its from a godlike messanger!

Lilly: You're right, oh well, let's just loot his chamber. We don't have any problems there.

***

Andrea: That'll be 30,000 for the Undead Ressurection.

Mordain: You chissler!
DungeonJman

12-13-06, 10:59 PM		Okay, so i understand him being brought back to unlife and all, but he really isn't a threat to the world now.
Charles Phipps

12-13-06, 11:10 PM		You can content yourself that his plot device threat is ruined. Now he'll just have to try something with ill tempered sea-bass or something.

I'm not trying to ruin your plot, merely get mine back on track.
DungeonJman

12-13-06, 11:24 PM		Meh, as of the time that i told Lilly, what i was stating was, in fact, true, so if he brings it up, i can say, that i was not lying.

*i.h.h we see the other two inclinations being held off by law*

Good: Okay, for the record, can we explain why there are no inclinations of neutrality and chaos?

Law: Simple, the evil inclination pretty much tempts him to do acts against his code of conduct, which he considers evil, but may sometimes just be chaotic, so he pretty much took over that department, and he doesn't believe in such thing as neutrality, so all times of apparent neutrality are controlled by either you or the evil inclination, depending on external factors.

Evil: You realize that you talk a lot?

Law: You have to in order to form loopholes, so i kind of got used to it.
rampant

12-13-06, 11:43 PM		OORampant - I'm sick of you and your @%$&*ing continuity.

Character Select

OORampant - Mewtwo!

OOKaizer - Link

Arena Select

Hyrule Castle

OODungeon - Why am I Luigi?
DungeonJman

12-14-06, 12:08 AM		Whatever

*grabs the lightsaber and starts swinging it around like a jedi before advancing on link*

OOKaizer: *i.h.h.* since when did Luigi become a jedi? :confused:

Oh and two things, since you're a pokemon, even Mewtwo doesn't that mean that a bunch of 12 year olds are going to try and collect you?

Also, here's something from the old battles

Pika-Man: PIKAAA!
Charles Phipps

12-14-06, 12:23 AM		Lilly: At last I'll be able to avenge my grandfather's death.

Tirmek: Mordain killed your Grandfather?

Lilly: Well, not really no.

Tirmek: Then...

Lilly: Well, Mordain Fleshweaver is actually Admiral Jarlot's twin brother.

Tirmek: :blink:

Lilly: Yeah, I was shocked too. So while Grandpa isn't dead, he sure wishes he was sometimes at family reunions

Tirmek: I thought my family was screwed up....

Thorn: Muahhahahaha! I can't wait to betray and kill you all!

Tirmek: We can hear you...

Lilly: Huh, I failed my Listen Check.

Tirmek: Oh God...

***

Mordain: Okay, because of Random Paladin Attacks. Plan A is kapoot.

The Unspeakable Horror: Can I help?

Mordain: You betrayed me!

The Unspeakable Horror: Yes, but I showed up to everyone and then they all went insane with horror and died.

Mordain: Fine, stay in the shadows. In any case, we have a plot to replace the main one.

Igor: What is it?

Mordain: Replace King Boranal with a complete idiot!

Igor: Err....already done sir.

Mordain: Damnit! I've been down here in this dungeon too long. I know! DESTROY ALL OF CYRE WITH A MAMMOTH MAGICAL EXPLOSION!

*crickets chirp*

Igor: Err....sorry sir.

Mordain: *taps fingers impatiently* No good huh. Well, at least Preparation H can still save my ass.

*Igor and the Unspeakable Horror stiffle snorting laughter*

Mordain: What? Are you offended by a Lich saying ass? Preparation H is the only hope I have! My ass is doomed otherwise!

*Igor falls on the ground laughing*

Mordain: ....oh whatever. Let's just raise an undead army and invade the surface world. That work for everyone?
rampant

12-14-06, 01:07 AM		OORampant - Bombs away!

OODungeon - Owie!

Link - JERK!
-------------------------------------------------------

next day

Tirmek - Oy prelims for the next week!
---------------------------------------------
Competitors will be put through various challenges, and practice bouts against proctors to gauge their initial standings. Prelim matches are not open content.
------------------------------------------------

Sarah - Then the challenge format, gah!
------------------------------------------------
Competitors will be allowed challenge one another in an open format. Various special rules may be used, depending on the standings of the competitors and which varient rules are applied the standings will be adjusted to reflect the outcome of the battle. Rematches are not allowed within two days of a match, except in the team formats. Challenge matches are recorded and made availiable in the records room at any library building.
----------------------------------------------------------------

Elina - The crux portion scares me, how are we gonna keep up with it all.
-----------------------------------------------------------
The challenge matches continue, whith the addition of various special challenges. These can range from mandatory varients to be used in challenge matches, special matches against proctors, as well as special objectives that can be carried out in or outside of a match.
----------------------------------------

Sithis - Then there's the Final arena matches.
-----------------------------------------------------
After the Crux the top 8 in the league ( 3 year league in this case ) take part in a day long 3 round tournament in which the participants engage in a series of one-on-one matches in strange arenas that significally alter the enviroment within.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-14-06, 08:08 AM		Short-Attention-Span-OOOOO! SHINY!: Must…not…read…boring…sports…junk—:zzz:

Polite-OOcat: #$&%@#$*! Stop saying mean things about peoples' posts! :mad:

Overreaction-OOcat: Sorry! Sorry! Sorry! :weep:

Bunny: :bored: You are pathetic.

OOcat: I know. But I'm not the one who equipt the skiffs with hyper deathrays.

Bunny (nonchalantly holding giagantic toolkit behind back): I have no idea what you're talking about. :shifty:
DungeonJman

12-14-06, 08:51 AM		*after being K.Oed, falls down into Eberron*

Mordain: Now that my undead army is finally ready, i can now rule Eberron. MUAHAHAHA :evillaugh:

*DungeonJ suddenly impacts his lair, destorying all the undead*

Ouch.. so.. much.. pain.

Mordain: Darn it, not again! Igor!

Igor: Yes, master?

Mordain: What's plan H?

Igor: To control a giant entity and place a demon inside of it and... HEY! The Forgotten Freedom has already thwarted this, master.

Mordain: Ok, what's Plan I?

Igor: We go down into Khyber and retrieve Elvis from the Lair of the Keeper.

Mordain: Elvis... is still alive ?!

Igor: Yes, and...

*Mordain runs off and comes back wearing an Elvis jacket and carrying 3 different Elvis dolls*

Mordain: To the King!
urial angel of death

12-14-06, 08:55 AM		OOC: Just to point out Elina's double should have been the opposite gender, if we're sticking to OotS so stop being a perv Kaizer. :P
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-14-06, 09:30 AM		OOC: Just to point out Elina's double should have been the opposite gender, if we're sticking to OotS so stop being a perv Kaizer. :P
OOC: Just to point out Kaizer isn't doing a direct translation of OOTS, so stop being a prude, man.

Naggat: NAGGAT SMASH ANNOYING PRUDE-MAN!
Kaizer_Ryu

12-14-06, 10:43 AM		*DungeonJ suddenly impacts his lair, destorying all the undead*
Meanwhile, in the original timeline, our "heros" have encountered the first eminations of undead.

Tirmek: All right! I finally get to try out my kick-awesome sword!

*Great Cleave* Two Hobgoblin Zombies fall.

*Great Cleave* Four more fall.

*Great Cleave* There goes another three.

Lilly: *snicker*

Sithis: *chuckle*

Tirmek: Great...Cleave...? I hear you two snickering back there. What's so funny?

Lilly: No, nothing, Tirmek, nothing.

Sithis: *snicker*

Lilly: It's just we had no idea you had such great cleavage!

Sithis: BWAHAHAHA!!!

Tirmek: :mad:

Lilly & Sithis: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Cleavage HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! :rofl:

Tirmek: :mad:

Lilly: *wiping tears of laughter away* Heh heh...

Sithis: *same* Hee...

...

...

Lilly: Tirmek has boobies!

Sithis: BA HA HA HA!!!!

Tirmek: :hoppingma
rampant

12-14-06, 12:00 PM		Tirmek - *shapeshifts into a female version of himself* I don't know why I was so ****** off. This is kind of fun.

Sithis - Genderbender jokes don't work on rakshasa very well do they?
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-14-06, 12:09 PM		Tirmek - ……This is kind of fun.
Lucky: Preach it, sister!
urial angel of death

12-14-06, 12:10 PM		OOC: I am not being a prude. It's just kind of annoying when every female that is written about regularly is a lesbian, despite having little or no reason to.
rampant

12-14-06, 12:26 PM		OOC: One make out session does not a lesbian make. Bi maybe. Besides its funny and thats all that matters.
------------------------------------------------------------

Lily - Must clean brain!

Tirmek - Oh yes this is fun.
Norr

12-14-06, 01:05 PM		Lucky: Preach it, sister!

OONorr - I just realized a new meaning to 'getting lucky' :D

Inevitable of bad puns - Whirling Frenzy!

OONorr - ARRGH! The pain! No! Not the face! Not The Face!
Charles Phipps

12-14-06, 01:55 PM		As a general reminder the following female characters are straight...

* Achika
* Andrea
* Marish (Yes, shocking!)
* Sakura Jaela

I also think Sarah is straight with Elina the only one whose ambigious. Zella and Aerith are bi because of their natures as a semi-divine being and an elf.

IC:

OOCharles: I can't believe I'm doing this.

*Countless animate dead scrolls appear by Mordain*

Mordain: What's this for

OOCharles: To restore my plot. Quite bluntly, I'll do pretty much whatever the hell it takes to thwart DungeonJman from ruining your plot for world domination.

Mordain: Isn't that a tad....villainish?

OOCharles: The only way for heroes to exist is for them to face great evils. Bluntly, it's getting to the point I'm going to start slaughtering the first born of Eberron to get the team to be able to do anything. It's the only way to serve the greater good.

Mordain: And people wonder about absolute power corrupting absolutely.

OOCharles: Oh hush.

Mordain: Listen! We're not just pawns in your sick little game!

OOCharles: Well it also helps that the entities are only quasi-canon anyway.

Mordain: Wait, what?

OOCharles: In the context of the Forgotten Freedomverse, breaking the fourth wall is actually something that is supposed to be ignored for the development of characters, while Earth exists the interaction between the fictional and non-fictional is purely a literary device. Entities really can't have an effect on the physical world of Eberron and any power realted to their status doesn't exist

Mordain: Someone might have F-ING MENTIONED THIS!

OOCharles: In any case, I've got your back.

Mordain: Oh fat lot of good that will do me, you've just said you can't interfere.

OOCharles: Much like Ao, I can be use proxies.

Mordain: Now I know how the people in the Matrix feel. Can we still raise Elvis as a Dracolich?

OOCharles: ....fine.
rampant

12-14-06, 02:29 PM		In lily's mindscape.

Lily (lust) - Tirmek is hawt!

Lily (rationality {whats left of it}) - He's a guy!

Lust - Not right now he ain't. Check those-

Rationality - For the love Women Get a hold of yourself!

Lust - Furry catgirl.

Rationality - Oh gods she's cute - BY THE E.B.N.E.'s SHE'S A HE! GET A HOLD OF YOUR SELF!
Charles Phipps

12-14-06, 02:50 PM		*hands over his craziest E.B.N.E. to rampant*
rampant

12-14-06, 03:39 PM		Um Thank you...

I'm just waiting for the other shoe to drop...

Probably on my rapidly swelling head...
------------------------------------------------

Ketty - I should have known not having a father figure around would make things tough for him, but this is going way beyond "daddy never hugged me".
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Lily - :twitch:

Sithis - (i.h.h. must not drool)

Sarah - You know we should probably stop him.

Elina - uh-huh (not listening)

Tirmek - Ok, this I could get used to.

Lily - Need ... much ... therapy!

Tirmek - ... Should I ask my mom to take me shopping?

Miko - This is gonna make girls' night out more interesting.
Charles Phipps

12-14-06, 04:01 PM		Ivy: Using my immense intelligence and Bardic Lore, I've determined that the key to opening up Mordain Fleshweaver's lair is to pass the three trials of the Dread Wizard. Each trial shall be one of the Five Turner Elements.

Lilly: Turner Elements?

Ivy: Earth, Wind, Fire, Water, and Heart.

Planeteers: GO PLANET!

*The Planeteers then are attacked by a random encounter with ill tempered Bulettes*

Lilly: I thought there were only three tests *fails spot and listen checks to help the Planeteers as they are eaten alive*

Ivy: We'll we're hardly the FIRST adventurers here Lilly. So, two got solved before us.

Lilly: DAMNIT! WHO IS THE KILL STEALING F***TARDS WHO STOLE OUR EP!

***

A century earlier

Jarlot: Damnit, we're only part of the adventure through and our GM has moved away!

Andrea: He has the module too! We can't complete the Tomb of Nightmares without him!

Gaia: I suppose we'll just head home now.

*The ranger who looks conspicously like Rose starts to talk*

Everyone but him: NO ONE WANTS YOUR SUGGESTION!

***

Thorn: In any case, I suggest we split up into smaller teams and go break the seals individually.

Elina: Wait, is the Wall of Force meant to keep us out or Mordain in? It's possible by breaking these seals that we'll unleash the ancient evil that has been imprisoned here for centuries and bring forth an age of fear and horror to Eberron.

Ivy: Well, we can always just ask DungeonJman.

*Points out to the Paladin standing roughly two feet off camera*

DungeonJman: First of all, I've got the Mordain situation well in hand. Second of all, the thing you've got...

Lilly: This is boring and doesn't involve killing. *Walks off to go slay monsters*

Miko: :love:

DungeonJman: *sigh*
Charles Phipps

12-14-06, 04:20 PM		Test of Wind

Miko: Well that was easy.

Ichigo: Yes, getting the key at the top of the tower is very easy when you can fly.

Miko: Then there was that Guardian Monster.

Ichigo: Yes, whom would have thought that a Slyph could actually be a Greater Barbazu demon.

*A Slyph slaughtered brutally is on the ground beside them*

Ichigo: Shouldn't she have transformed back to her true form by now?

Miko: Barbazu are like that. You should trust me because I'm the expert.

Ichigo: Oh of course.

Miko: So are you and Thorn dating?

Ichigo: Oh not anymore. Not since I found him passing the wood to a Dryad.

***

Antimatter verse

Ichigo: NO!

*Thorn is handing over a bonzai tree to a Dryad*

Thorn: It's not what it looks like!

***

Ichigo: Now we're just good friends.

Miko: Oh.

Ichigo: Well, without the friendship part.

Miko: I see. So, what's your saving throw?

Ichigo: Not very high. I took rogue levels.

Miko: I only took one Rogue Level.

Ichigo: Really?

Miko: Yeah, for Sneak Attack.

*stabs Ichigo in the heart with a petrifying dagger as the half-deva falls to the ground as a stone statue*

Miko: Ah the joys of evil.

*skips along back to the group*
rampant

12-14-06, 04:59 PM		Tirmek - Miko I'm not happy with you!

Miko - She got stoned by the -

Tirmek - You couldn't have gotten rid of Thorn while you were at it!
rwarner3701

12-14-06, 05:23 PM		In Jarlot's Flashback


Lilly: I Ron't rappreciate reing a rog.

OORwarner: It's not my fault.

Lilly: Rell ret it rover rith ralready.

OORwarner: I'll try.

Lilly: And ranother rhing ri'm rot a roward.

OORwarner: That gives me an idea... here try this.

Lilly: Ta ta da daaa! Puppy Power!

OORwarner: :rofl:

Lilly: Well at least I can talk right now...

OORwarner: There are other benefits.

Lilly: Like what?

OORwarner: What would you guess a Spoony Snack is?

Lilly: Oh right, I forgot all about that.

OORwarner: And Elina is the one who is supposed to give them out.

Lilly: Suddenly I am all for this plan.
Charles Phipps

12-14-06, 05:57 PM		*passes "Random act of Funny" award to rwarner3701*
DungeonJman

12-14-06, 06:06 PM		*walks back on board*

Ouch..., anyway, Rose i was looking through the old records and i found a continuity error

Rose: A what?!?

I was looking back at the way back when spoof of when you guys invaded Boranal's castle, and i discovered that there is no way that the guy you met there was the real Aaren d'Cannith, because he has not been seen ever since his house excommunictaed him. So the real one is still on the loose. *realizes something* Of course!

*runs away, and later, we see Stupid hanging out by the side of the deck*

Now wait, he's probably still stupid, so i have to..

*whacks Stupid over the head hard enoungh to bring the Scholar/Lord of Blades personality out.

Scholar: Finally, I am once again free to..

Aaren d'Cannith, by the laws of the Four Nations, you are under arrest for mass murder and treason. Anything you say can and will be used against you in the international court of law. If you want, you may have an attorney, or else the states will provide one fore you

*puts him in handcuffs*

Aaren: But how did you... ?!?!?

Not important, now come on, we have to get you to Throneport for the trial.

*leads him away*
Charles Phipps

12-14-06, 06:30 PM		Rose: *wearing green shirt and brown pants with a goatee* GASP! IT WAS SCHOLAR ALL LONG!

Lilly: I'll pound em! I'll splat him!

Rose: Eh, whatever. I'm going to smoke my uhh...special medicine...and eat a small van of snacks.
DungeonJman

12-14-06, 07:53 PM		Oh and before i leave Rose, you have to ask Ketler if he is willing to come to the trial.

Rose: Like, Zoinks man, why?

Because he is technically related to Aaren, and the law states that family members are entitled to come to the trial. Although he may not want to, especially since his other family members are going to be there at the trial.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-14-06, 08:34 PM		OOC: Ooooo, Ketler gets a Dramatic Family Confrontation.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-14-06, 08:52 PM		I also think Sarah is straight with Elina the only one whose ambigious.
OOC: Actually, they're both ambiguous at this time. Mostly because it's funny, but also because they're emotionally the equivalent of young teenagers. Remember, Sarah was interested in finding out what it was like kissing another girl...

IC:

Test of Earth

Sarah: You know, I'm not sure how I feel about this...

Tirmek: But it's fun!

Sarah: I know the differences are only superficial. You're still Tirmek, no matter what you look like. I'm just uncomfortable.

Tirmek: :confused: Around another girl?

Sarah: :embarrass With the fact that I think you're cuter like this...

Doog Jr: doog jr think kitty boy-girl should be puppy.

Tirmek: Um...why a puppy?

Doog Jr: doog jr like puppies.

Sarah: I thought you said you liked killing?

Doog Jr: doog jr full of amusing contradictions.

Sarah & Tirmek: :uh-huh:

Catgirl A: Do I even have a name or personality? :weep:

OOKaizer: Hell if I know. I didn't create you.

Catgirl A: Can you create a name, class, and more definite personality for me? :bigeyes:

OOKaizer: I'm not sure I-

Catgirl A: :bigeyes: :weep:

OOKaizer: Gah! The cuteness! Ok, ok! You shall henceforth be known as Katrina. You are a Wildmage and have deep-seated emotional problems that cause you to go from friendly to rip-their-eyes-out vicious towards those around you on a whim.

Katrina: :bored: Like most cats?

OOKaizer: ...ok, you got me there. Now back to the trial!

Sarah: Too late.

Katrina: Meow?

Tirmek: We already passed the trial.

Doog Jr: doog jr like ice cream with sprinkles.

Sarah: We split up when we reached some tunnels up ahead. Strangely enough, we heard talking but no one was around when we reached a big room with a sigil on the wall.

Doog Jr: fairy lady taste like chicken.

Tirmek: What?

Doog Jr: doog jr want puppy. thorn not let doog jr have puppy. He say doog jr not take re-spon-sa-bility. doog jr care for puppy good. maybe not-thorn let doog jr have puppy?

Sarah: :uh-huh: Not-Thorn?

Katrina: The Spoony Paladin. He can't comprehend more than one name to a face, thus Thorn and Not-Thorn.

Tirmek: I've been meaning to ask. Why does Thorn have a beard? He's eleven.

Katrina: Evil opposite.

Tirmek: Oh, right.

Katrina: ROWW!!! *scratch*

Sarah: :eek: WTF?!

Katrina: :cloud9: Prrrrrrr....

Sarah: :twitch: Can't...accept...that...evil...opposite. ..is...cuter...than...me...!

Tirmek: You're a wolf-girl, remember?

Sarah: :devil:

Katrina: :eek:

*chase scene ensues*
rampant

12-14-06, 08:58 PM		Movie Night:

Tirmek - I thought girls hated these movies.

Miko - No we just like to torment guys.

The image system is playing T-3

Sarah - Pass the popcorn.

Tirmek - *telekinesis*

Elina - Thanks.
Charles Phipps

12-14-06, 09:25 PM		Catgirl B: Hmmm, how about me?

OOCharles: Alright Kitty

Kitty: :rollseyes: Great original thinking.

OOCharles: You're a priestess of the Fury. Your mission is to help bring about chaos and destruction.

Kitty: Mmmmm clerical.

OOCharles: No you don't have to be Chaotic Evil but....

Kitty: MAY THE WORLD DROWN IN LAKES OF BLOOD IN THE NAME OF MY MISTRESS!

OOCharles: Okay....

Kitty: *GLOMPS onto Tirmek*

Tirmek: Ummm....

Kitty: Mmmmm sexy avatar of destructive power. Tigerish....

Sarah: *sigh* They're not even pretending we're not adults are they?

Ivy: It's sort of like Days of Our Lives, one day everyone is a bunch of adolescents then angsty teens.

*everyone stares at Ivy*

Ivy: :sweat drop: Not that I know about things like that....

Lilly: Next is the Test of Water.

Ice Elemental: ROWR!

Lilly: Fireball.

Ice Elemental: ARGHHHHHHH!

Thorn: Fireball.

Ice Elemental: GARHhhhhhhh...

Lilly: We have to expect a truly ingenious and brilliant set of traps here.

Ice Elemental: GNash! Snarl!

Elina: Produce Flame.

Sarah: Produce Flame.

Ivy: Burning Hands.

Katrina: Fireball.

Kitty: Produce Flame.

Ice Elemental: HISSSssssssssssssssssss....oh my beautiful wickedness.

Lilly: So let's be on our guard.

*they walk into a room with a giant puddle in it*

Lilly: How deceptively simple.
Charles Phipps

12-14-06, 09:38 PM		*Miko pauses before the door to the Inner Sanctum*

Miko: Better remove armor so I lose the encumbrance penalty. Also, get some height bonuses

*Becomes much more mature looking adult with shapeshifting ability, wearing tank top and miniskirt*

Miko: Hmmmm...

*Crawls up the side of the wall, backflips over, stretches to both sides, stands on her head, and sommersaults about the door*

Miko: Nope! No traps that I can find.

Tirmek: :blink:

Elina: :twitch:

Lilly: :drool:

Ivy: By all means, take ten!

Lilly: Yes, better check again!

Miko: Okay, oops! Wardrobe malfunction!
urial angel of death

12-14-06, 09:54 PM		OOC: Will be posting more way far future tomorrow.
Charles Phipps

12-14-06, 09:56 PM		OOC: Awesome Urial.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-14-06, 10:10 PM		Sarah: Out of the way you faker! I'm Haley! And fix your top!

Miko: Oh, like you didn't look. :devil: Anyway, I went ahead and took 20, just to be sure.

Lilly: Do it again! :drool: *seriously* If you both look, we'll be even more sure.

Tirmek: :mad: *whap*

Elina: I feel very confused by that turn of events.

Katrina: Who's gonna open the door?

Kitty: Not me. I cause chaos, I'm not about to be a victim of it.

Ivy: Hmmmmm.... *bluff*

Thorn: I'm sure it's safe, but I'd rather not.

Ivy: *diplomacy*

Thorn: That is a good point...

Ivy: *INFLUENCE REACTION*

Thorn: I'LL DO IT!
rampant

12-14-06, 10:20 PM		OOC: Sarah's a psi-user think *energy insert shape of attack*
---------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Ok Now that we've restored Ichigo.

Miko - *whisper* Hate you and your stupid restoration scrolls.

Tirmek - *whisper* next time get Thorn

Thorn - Weren't you a boy five minutes ago?

Tirmek - Half-Rakshasa

Thorn - So are you a boy or a girl?

Tirmek - Normally male, but i'm enjoying not having to turn sideways to fit my shoulders through a tunnel.

Thorn - (i.h.h. too bad I'm gonna betray him, he's cute if a little wacko)

Tirmek - (skimming thoughts) I'm not sure if I should take this as a compliment...OOOH a few of these mental images should screw Lily up what good.

In Lily's mindscape

Lust - Ok Girl tirmek was one thing.

Rationality - Can't sleep squirrels will eat me.

Physical realm

Lily collapses into, convulsions foaming at the mouth.

Thorn - Is this normal behavior?

Tirmek - I only wish.
Charles Phipps

12-14-06, 10:20 PM		*after being hit with every trap known to man and surviving mostly by the virtue of a Natural 20 on fortitude*

Thorn: GAH! MY LIFE IS PAIN!

Ivy: Hey, there's another door! *bluff*

Thorn: Well at least this one is safe.

Miko: Well, technically neither me or Sarah have Rogue Levels...
DungeonJman

12-14-06, 11:05 PM		Wait, i thought there were only two duplicates in the first place! Also, since you mentioned the Matrix... oh no, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!!!

*Keaneau Jarlot reappears*

Keneau Jarlot: I AM THE ONE!!! Plus, I can do kung fu!

*groans while doing some hand motions*

There, so i at least controlled where the Smiths went. Plus, i put a warning on the door leading to them.

Aaren/ Lord of Blades: Who the heck are you talking to ?!?!

It's... you wouldn't understand. Especially since you're a homicidal maniac who's been living in a warforged suit for the last 28 years!

Aaren/Lord of Blades: Humanity is evil, you've seen what humans can do. They do not care about thinking beings which have a right to live their own lives. They oppress them, torture them, brainwash them, destroy them, and remove the purpose from their lives. Then when i try to set things right, they claim that what they're doing is justified because i'm doing the same things. What i was doing may not have been justified, but i couldn't let humanity ruin the world!

Not all humans are evil Aaren, you used to believe that. There are also people on the Forgotten Freedom who see as you used to, and try to bring out the best in people, rather than attempting to destroy them, but you've changed these last 28 years.

Aaren/Lord of Blades: Why are you doing this, you know that i'm going to be convicted, and at the very least, spend the rest of my life in jail, if not execution!

Warforged can feel as people do, so i'm not trying to save you from thinking like them. I'm trying to save you from thinking like a heartless monster, so that regardless of what your fate is, your mind will regain its humanity and be at peace.
rwarner3701

12-14-06, 11:42 PM		OOC: Since silver turned Lilly into a small yippy dog I figured he would be a better Scrappy and it fits his personality better.

Jarlot's Birthday Party Flashback


Tirmek: If you are done we have a mystery to solve.

Elina: We need to look for clues.

Sarah: Where do we start?

Tirmek: To the lower decks!

Lilly: (i.h.h time to act cowardly) No way its scary down there.

Elina: Ok you can wait here.

Lilly: What, you are supposed to get me to go with you... maybe offer a spoony snack.

Elina: Fine here you go...

Gregory quickly juts in front of Lilly to steal the spoony snack

Lilly: :headexplo

Sarah: :blink:

Gregory: :cool:

Tirmek: Lets get a move on.

Everyone starts to head down the hall Lilly stands for a moment in stunned silence before sighing and moving to follow.

----
In the lower decks

Tirmek: Let's split up gang.

Gregory: Why do we always split up?

Tirmek: We cover more ground and besides... I'll take Sarah and Elina you two go the other way.

Lilly: That's not fair.

Elina: Fine I'll go with you two.

Tirmek: Remember we are looking for any trace of what could be messing with the booze.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-15-06, 06:49 PM		Volrath: What are you doing?

Terra: We're going through a bunch of our old photos and image crystals from the honeymoon.

Volrath: GAH! I don't want to see that!

Lisa: :rolleyes: Those are in a completely different and securely locked extradimensional space. These are the actual sightseeing ones.

Volrath: Oh, good. *picks up an image crystal* :mymy: The hell?!

Terra: Oh, that's where we found the time machine and went back to kill a Karrnathian dictator before he began his horrific rampage across Khorvaire.

Volrath: :eek: You killed HITLER?!

Lisa: Uh huh.

Volrath: You can't do that! It messes with the timeline!

Terra: Oh, come on. You can't have a time machine and not go back to kill Hitler.

Volrath: Wouldn't that...like...disrupt the fabric of the universe and destroy everything? That's my shtick.

Lisa: Once we finished, we went back and stopped ourselves.

Volrath: Well...I...that...uh...I guess that makes it ok...

*on the image crystal*

Terra appears next to Hitler carrying an ENORMOUS scimitar with serrated edges, sure to cause immense pain upon contact.

Hitler: :eek:

Terra: Ich bin ein Kerrnathian, beyotch!

Hitler: Mein GOT! *runs*

Terra: Oh no you don't you pre-Galifar evil dictator!

Hitler: Du hasst mich gefragt, und ich hab nichts gesagt!

*BLOODY GORE OF AWESOME PREPORTIONS*

Terra: :D *covered in blood* I'll give it credit. It certainly has lived up to the hype.

*back in the present*

Volrath: Where were you?

Lisa: I was recording. I got to go next.

Volrath: So...when does the stopping come in?

Terra: After seventy three takes each. We couldn't fit anymore of us in the hall.

Lisa: We went back and stopped ourselves before we even went back and gave ourselves the recording.

Volrath: Oh, well that makes perfect sense.
rampant

12-15-06, 07:00 PM		Satnak and Serene's quarters

Dorvos (on a flute) - doot-doot-de-doot-deeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Corre - eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh!

Teiza - Grrrrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Corre and Teiza are playing tag, dashing about on all fours using their crysthral (red for corre, black for teiza) to lengthen their arms.

Lisa - Well they certainly have plenty of energy.

Satnak - You don't know the half of it. -tired smile-

Terra - Are you getting enough sleep?

Satnak - Yes

Serene - No

Satnak - I'm not leaving you alone with three children, two of which are still in their feral stage, anymore than I have to.

Terra - Feral stage?

Serene - You make them sound like wild animals.

Mittens - Me-OW ( grandma! Teiza keeps stealing my kills )
------------------------------------------------------------------

Dorvos d'Borisheel Ir'Tessier - Eldest son, Tall and skinny for his age, Dorvos constantly battles a mental block that hinders normal speach. Ten eye marks circle his upper torso each the same shade of as the eyes of his mom Serene, as are the two eyes in his head. His purple hair obscues a closed eye mark that twitches and sparks occasionally whenever he plays music or endures intense emotions. His long thin tail is equipped with a viscious set of fangs that drain the blood from his targets. His Crysthral is purple (same as his hair), and so far he has not been able to manifest full wings. However he has managed to use it to form armored plates on his legs and great talons on his feet, another favored technique is shaping the crysthral into spidery legs on his back letting him climb and jump with great efficiency. His favorite power is the creation of astral constructs. Dorvos is not combatiive, but prefers to compete in other ways.
Psion(shaper)/Bard

Corre d'Borisheel Ir'Tessier - Young daughter (first of a twinned set), Corre is young yet and at this point more instinct than raional thought. Physically she is similar to dorvos when he was her age. Although she bears multiple tails (four to be precise), and none are as long or fanged like dorvos's. Her fangs are located in her mouth. Her 12 open eyes glow red like rubies. Her closed eye is plainly visible, due to the way Satnak likes to come her hair back. Her main interests so far are playing with her sister, and listening to Dorvos or Serene perform. Her crysthral is red.

Teiza d'Borisheel Ir'Tessier - Young Daughter (second of the set), aside from having onyx coloration in the eyes and Crysthral Teizal is physically Identical to her sister. She likes to hunt small animals and generally spends time with the cats. The squirrels don't like her.
Charles Phipps

12-15-06, 08:12 PM		The 2006 Forgotten Freedom Election!

Place your vote for Rose or Jarlot for Captain.

The Spoony Donkey or the Tyranosaurus.

Or King Steve.

King Steve: I promise to start a war in a country that I haven't already!

Doog: I'm not voting.

*Is garroted to death by Jacob Hunter before tossing him over the side into the ocean full of sharks*

Vote Today!

Ketler: Can I vote in Aaren D'Cannith?

No.

OOC: I can't wait for the trial DungeonJman. Good plot diea.
rampant

12-15-06, 08:15 PM		Jarlot - I promise not to be spoony!

Crew screams their lungs out.

Jarlot - I will revoke the Redshirt tax!

Silence (not the binder )

Jarlot - Who gave the redshirts a vote?
Charles Phipps

12-15-06, 08:24 PM		Rose: The Emancipation of the Red shirts was a campaign promise.

Jarlot: They're Emancipated now?

Rose: Hell no, I said it was a campaign PROMISE>

Jarlot: Oh *whew*

***

Doog's Ghost: Doog...err Junior. You must avenge me!

Doog II: AH! Ghost!

Lilly: Ghost! *TURN UNDEAD*

Doog's Ghost: Wait! This is a touching father-son moment of vengean...AHHHHH!

*is blasted by flesh burning energy from Lilly's sword that destroys the spectre utterly*

Doog II: Thank you Not Thorn. Doog worried about losing levels to see-through daddy

Lilly: Well I'm always primmed for any sign of undead.

*A Vampire causally strolls by*

Elina: Well right makes might.

Lilly: A WIGHT! *TURN UNDEAD*

Elina: I said might! Sheesh.

Sarah: Hey, I can't wait for us to find some treasure. We'll all be rich.

Lilly: A LICH! *TURN UNDEAD*

Elina: *sigh* Stop that. You're making yourself look silly.

Lilly: A wraith named billy! *Turn undead*

Elina: Now you're doing it on purpose.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

12-15-06, 09:21 PM		Chance Random "A vote for me is a vote for actual priacy."

Meanwhile Ash is distributing flyers, and campeghn buttons, witch varusly read
'Dont take a Chanse, vote Jarlot'
'There is no Spoony'
'A vote for Jarlot is a vote for not being hunted down and set on fire- repeatedly'
'Say it with Jarlot'
'Its time Spoony was Bard'
'Why settle for the lesser of Two Evils- Vote Jarlot!'
As he waits he is reading a book entitled 'Vote tampering and you' by G.D. Shrub.

Nalfen "I thought you lost your powers with the Tyranid invasion?"

Ash "Meh, My entity stoped feeling Emo and gave me a can of 'Shut the hell up and get a grip on yourself' he orders a few cases for the christmas period every year, so its game on, just as well too, Conflagaration cups comming up soon, we still need to train a bit more."
Kaizer_Ryu

12-15-06, 09:44 PM		Nalfein: :confused: Christmas?

Ash: Uh...I mean Dol Dorn-mas. :shifty:

Nalfein: Oh, right. But I'm both disappointed and excited you've managed to regain your powers.

Ash: You actually care?

Nalfein: Considering that you once again don't fear fire, it's less fun to torch you. On the other hand, I get a chance to prove I'm the bigger pyro in a semi-fair contest.

Ash: ...semi-fair?

Nalfein: As a Wizard, I'm overpowered simply by existing. :P Plus, I break the rules. Observe. *CHAIN-GUN FIREBALL*

The spell does pretty much what the name says. Rapid-fire Fireballs consume a large portion of the Alt-Ishmael Jr's as Nalfein laughs manaically.

Nalfein: One Fireball per unused spell-slot for you losers still bound by the rules. Fear me, little birdy! :evillaugh

Kerrith: *heard from somewhere below deck* :D Master Nalfein is amazing!

Ash: :drool: Best...spell...EVER! *hugs Nalfein*

Nalfein: GAH! GET OFF ME YOU OVERGROWN CONDOR!

Bunny: :cool: Always a pleasure doing business with you.

13: :D It's amazing how often my job coincides with yours.
Charles Phipps

12-15-06, 09:53 PM		Lilly: At last, we've come to the Chamber for Mordain's phylactery.

Thorn: :shifty: Errr yeah. That's what I was leading you too.

Sarah: What IS this place?

Ivy: According to my Bardic lore, this is the Tomb where all the rejected campaign settings were stored when they chose Keith Baker's stuff.

Lilly: Hey, here's something by Charles Phipps called "Endless Seas."

*opens the book and HUGGGGGgeeeeeee water piles pour out along with large numbers of pirate ships*

Sarah: Hey, here's one by Kaizer Ryu.

Lilly: It looks like the Book of Ultimate Darkness.

Miko: Gimme.

Ichigo: Wow, some of these things look really bad. By the way, how long was I imprisoned?

Thorn: Well everyone was turned to stone until a magical cataclysm undid the curse. It's actually been 10,000 years. Everyone you've ever known is dead and the world has long since passed to wasteland.

Ichigo: NO! ALL MY LOVED ONES!

Lilly: LOL!

Thorn: ROTFLMAO.

Miko: Wow, sadistic humor isn't against the Paladin's code.

Thorn: In any case, let's just get the amulet and go.

Tirmek: Why don't I get it.

Thorn: Okay.

Tirmek: :shifty: Wait, he's letting me. That means that it could be trapped. Let's have DOOG get it.

Doog: Okay.

*Doog gets the amulet then even as Thorn cackles madly as Doog and he glow*

Tirmek: What the...

Thorn: Doog is my familiar. I've just ascended to DEMI-GAWDHOOD!

Miko: Hmmmm...

*kicks Ichigo into the pile of acidic trashy writing as she screams*

Miko: *pulls out her Battleax of Unholy Avenging +6* Okay, NOW he's worth killing.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-15-06, 09:54 PM		OOcat: Time to 8-bit!

Nalfein is still looking for Linda.

Nalfein: Oh, yeah, Fighter, we'll go out and fight evil and be all kind and good and help people blah blah blah gag me. Light Warriors, HA! It's just some scam to draw attention away from the failings of the government.

Then he sees Linda walk into a magic store.

Nalfein: Glaguh :love:!

Inside Linda is reading a copy of the Spell Compendium.

Nalfein: Well, what's a nice girl like you doing in a rough neighborhood like this?

Linda: Yes, it's very dangerous, what with home for the elderly down the road and the street the orphanage next door and the childrens' center across the street.

Nalfein: Hey, children can be pretty twisted. Believe me, I know, I live with a pack of them. Ferocious. And let's not start about where they get it……

Linda: They do charity work for the elderly.

Nalfein: Not any more they don't!

Linda (looking up from her book): What do you mean?

Nalfein: Well, I was just at the old fogies home, and they were all quite crispy and silent.

Linda: Who could do such a thing?

Nalfein: Well, I don't like to brag, but—

Linda: What horrible sort of monster could attack innocent, defenseless old men who weren't war vetrens or had any other sort of past that could make a justification that they deserved it?

Nalfein: —I have no idea.

It would take a fiend of such twisted genius as to be insane enough to unlock the gateway between this world and one of pure magical energy to impose it upon this reality in a way that all I have to do is flick my wrist and the energy emerges from me as a bolt of the purest lightening, by the dark gods, it's the ultimate rush! IT'S THE ONLY TIME I FEEL ALIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!

Linda: :uh-huh: (edges away)

Nalfein: Oh yeah, :cool: , she wants me.

Linda: Shopkeep? Do you have any lawyer magic?
Kaizer_Ryu

12-15-06, 10:06 PM		OOC: Book of Ultimate Darkness... :plotting: :evillaugh

IC:

Sarah: This won't end well.

Elina: Tirmek out thought by Lilly's evil opposite.

Tirmek: :twitch:

Lilly: *whisper*

Tirmek: I most certainly will not!

Lilly: If we die anyway, no one will know.

Tirmek: ...if you say one word, I'll make sure you can never procreate even with Caralot's help.

Tirmek shapeshifts into a puppy, barking and wagging his tail at Doog Jr.

Doog Jr: puppy! can doog jr keep puppy, thorn?

Thorn: NO!

Doog Jr: :weep:

Lilly: I'll let you!

Doog Jr: yay! *drops the amulet and picks up Tirmek*

Thorn and Doog Jr stop being glowy.

Tirmek: (i.h.h.) I think I'll castrate him anyway. :mad:
rampant

12-15-06, 10:25 PM		Tirmek - I love being psychic *telekinesis*

The amulet flys towards Tirmek and places itself on his neck.

Nothing happens

Tirmek - Awwww, this just isn't fair! *chomp*

Doog Jr - ...

Tirmek - *still chomping* (i.h.h. 3..2..1..GO!)

Goog Jr. - Owwwwww

Tirmek - *yoink*
Charles Phipps

12-15-06, 10:29 PM		OOC: Man, Nalfien just gets cooler and cooler

;-)

And great bit there Kaizer.

IC:

Thorn: Curses, thankfully I have a backup plan.

Lilly: Ha! Like they fear anything from MY evil double.

Thorn: In a bit of irony, being your opposite means that my wisdom is extraordinarily high. That means the medallion can only be used once and thus I am already invincible!

Lilly: Crap. How can we defeat an enemy with such overwhelming common sense!

Doog Jr.: Puppy :love:

Tirmek: :bigeyes: Hit Thorn a lot would you?

Doog Jr: Must obey puppy.

*Screams of demigawd getting mauled by Orc fill the air*

***

Sarah: Now it's time for looting.

Miko: *Covered in Blood* Yes! Looting!

Sarah: What happened to you?

Miko: Remember Thorn's henchmen?

Sarah: Yes.

Miko: Don't. :twitch: (ihh.) Please don't let her realize I can't kill kittens and let them go.

Sarah: Okay. So, I guess we'll divide up the loot evenly.

Miko: :snort:

Sarah: Oh right, between US then.

Miko: Surreeee :cackles:

Sarah: I'll trade you this magical cursed artifact *hands her a Helm of Opposite Alignment* for all the treasure.

Miko: Sweet! Gimme!

*takes it*

Sarah: :big grin:
rampant

12-15-06, 11:02 PM		back up a scene or two

Tirmek - (normal form) I don't care if its by proxy, I finally get to use Lily's skull as a candy dish.

Lily - I thought you weren't supposed to have sugar?

Tirmek - Shut up!

Thorn - Ummmmmm lets make love not war.

Tirmek - Ok making a pass at me is one thing, but that was pathetic. You die now.
Charles Phipps

12-15-06, 11:08 PM		Thorn: Except, I know your SECRET WEAKNESS!

*Doog Junior was stoog eye poked and is now on the ground rather battered*

Thorn: *pulls out Frosted Flakes* AH HA!

Lilly: I already tried that.

Tirmek: Crap, that works in my world.

*is then socked in the gut by Tirmek*
rampant

12-15-06, 11:09 PM		Izzy - I feel unloved:weep:

Lady - Join the club.

Cole - hehehehe

Rashour - What did he blow up this time?

Schroedigger - The mailbox?

A.W.L. - Two bits on the galley!
urial angel of death

12-15-06, 11:48 PM		OOC: Kaizer I looked in the MM4 which despite bad reviews was pretty good (just had a lot of classed monsters :mad: ) Well it had a celestial fiendish hybrid as you described Terra to be. They stop being templates and become the base race, which has a base CR of 19! Wait I shouldn't have told you that!

Powergamer Kaizer: *drooling* Gemme!

IC:Terra looked around the small passenger compartment she was in. Beside her sat Terrek. A Puerto Rican lawyer named Reman was seated right next to the cockpit door, in the front. Lastly in the far back was the disgusting Ketler Nedry. He was munching away on a candy bar, not even noticing the chucks that missed his mouth and fell to the floor. Terra briefly wondered were he got them all, before deciding it was best left unknown. She then turned her attention to the man just entering. He must be that mathematician Mr. Hammond talked about. What was his name? Niphlim? Nalphrim? Nathan?

man: *extending his hand* Nalfien Valeth it's a pleasure to meet you.

Terrek: So I hear you're the other expert our employer asked to the resort he's planning.

Nalfien: Yes, I work with very complex probability models.

Terrek: So how do you think it's going to do?

Nalfien: I don't think, I know. Based on the information I have recieved thus far, the park is going to fail and in a big way.

Terra: Then why are you coming out here?

Nalfien: It'll fail, but it's going to be a fun ride down.
urial angel of death

12-16-06, 12:16 AM		After a few hours of flight the plane touched down on a remote island called Isla Hazard. Kanatash Hammond was waiting for them, as the group filed out of the plane.

Kanatash: Why hello and welcome everyone. I hope you enjoy your stay here.

Terrek: Alright mister Hammond why did you bring up-

Terra: *looking up* Terrek...

Terrek: Just a second I'l talking to Mr. Hammond. Now why-

Terra: Terrek...

Terrek: Just a sec-

Terra: Terrek!

Terrek: What?!

Terrek finally looked in the sme direction as his student.

Terrek: :shocked: *

He was looking at something that was not ment to be. He was looking at the enormous body of a dhole looming over them.

Kanatash: Well I hope you find all of our attractions just as amazing and enjoy your stay at Mythos Park.

*This is the only time I will be able to use thatsmiley for Terrek
rampant

12-16-06, 01:05 AM		Aero - Deck the halls with boughs of holly

Dorvos - Fa la la la la laah la la la la

Corre - heh!

Teiza - zzz
Kaizer_Ryu

12-16-06, 01:19 AM		OOC: Kaizer I looked in the MM4 which despite bad reviews was pretty good (just had a lot of classed monsters :mad: ) Well it had a celestial fiendish hybrid as you described Terra to be. They stop being templates and become the base race, which has a base CR of 19! Wait I shouldn't have told you that!

OOKaizer: That doesn't just encompass Terra. It's actually far closer to being a base race for Sarah and Elina.

Elina: :twitch: CR 19...

Sarah: Which means you've been playing us far weaker than even you imagined.

OOKaizer: *anime sweatdrop* I'm pretty sure this is a bad thing...

All previous enemies the girls have tried to, yet did not, kill simultaniously explode from the new math applied to their battles. All the ones they have killed groan in agony as the adjusted figures make their way to Dolurrh.

OOKaizer: Wait, the seals are restraining a great deal of their innate power, so I guess it's not that bad.

The enemies whose heads a sploded return to life, and the ones in Dolurrh forget what just happened.

Sarah: Weak!

Elina: I know! All that EXP! Here and then gone again, just like that. :weep:
rampant

12-16-06, 02:53 AM		Elina - Hello

Dorvos - Hmmm *nudges Corre forward*

Sarah - Don't be shy.

Teiza - *Chomp*

Elina - I liked those shoes.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-16-06, 07:55 AM		Bunny grabs Kanatash Hammond by the collar.

Bunny: STOP BRINGING THINGS TO LIFE THAT I ALREADY KILLED!

13: :D

Bunny: :mad: There is going to be a lot of killing going on here.

Silver: Hmmm, how to turn this new life to my advantage………:devil:

OOcat: Dhole? As in an omnivorous Asiatic wild dog that doesn't look all that remarkable?
urial angel of death

12-16-06, 11:04 AM		OOC: First off there will be a lot of killing. Secondly none of them were brought back to life, how they came to be will be explained later. And thirdly the dhole is a mythos monster that looks like this (http://distritos.telepolis.com/tabernadecartago/lib/Cthulhu/Imagenes/bichosd20/p/dhole_d20p.jpg)and is over 200 feet long. I was unaware of the dog.
rampant

12-16-06, 12:33 PM		Teiza - Grrrrrrrrrrr

Corre - :hides:

Chili - Rarrrrrr

Teiza - *glare*

Chili - Arp arp arp (runs away)

Satnak - That was food girls.

Serene - You don't have to be scared Corre.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

12-16-06, 12:48 PM		OOC: First off there will be a lot of killing. Secondly none of them were brought back to life, how they came to be will be explained later. And thirdly the dhole is a mythos monster that looks like this (http://distritos.telepolis.com/tabernadecartago/lib/Cthulhu/Imagenes/bichosd20/p/dhole_d20p.jpg)and is over 200 feet long. I was unaware of the dog.

OOC: Wait, arent Dhole eggs very similar to large geodes?.. Like the ones Ebberon Shards are found in?.. uhoh...
urial angel of death

12-16-06, 01:00 PM		OOC: Yes, yes they are. :D
cypher_zero

12-16-06, 01:49 PM		OOC: ... So this is what happens when I'm away for a bit... Oookay..... I am throughly confused as to what's going on with the Terra/Terrek Jurassic Park thing; that is to say, is it supposed to be canon? One little thing though: Terrek's last name is ir'Tessier (though it used to be D'Cannith).

IC:
In Teseris...

Terrek: Satnak stand down. (to demon lawyers) Which soul in particular were you interested in.

Demon: I should think you know which one...

Terrek: Humor me.
.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-16-06, 02:04 PM		OOC: First off there will be a lot of killing.
Bunny: Yay!
Secondly none of them were brought back to life, how they came to be will be explained later.
Bunny: That's the problem with parodies: you can never tell which parts their stealing until they do it.
And thirdly the dhole is a mythos monster that looks like this (http://distritos.telepolis.com/tabernadecartago/lib/Cthulhu/Imagenes/bichosd20/p/dhole_d20p.jpg)and is over 200 feet long. I was unaware of the dog.
OOC: I figured as much. I was just doing my usual commentary. XD
urial angel of death

12-16-06, 02:06 PM		OOC: ... So this is what happens when I'm away for a bit... Oookay..... I am throughly confused as to what's going on with the Terra/Terrek Jurassic Park thing; that is to say, is it supposed to be canon? One little thing though: Terrek's last name is ir'Tessier (though it used to be D'Cannith).


OOC: It is a possible future. After all the moral of the FF and Chrono Trigger are about the same. Individuals can change their destiny and no fate is set in stone.
urial angel of death

12-16-06, 02:11 PM		Bunny: That's the problem with parodies: you can never tell which parts their stealing until they do it.


In the original they weren't brought back either they were created anew. The genetist (who wasn't included in the movie) even admited that he had no idea if the monsters he created were the same as the real thing or completely different.


OOC: I figured as much. I was just doing my usual commentary. XD

I probably should have guessed.
rwarner3701

12-16-06, 02:18 PM		Jarlot's Birthday Party Flashback

Lilly, Elina and Gregory wander around in the lower decks until they find a door. Going inside they see that it is a kitchen and both Gregory and Lilly rush over to the fridge sitting against one of the walls. Opening it they see that despite the fact that it is in an abondoned part of the ship it is fully stocked with fresh food.

Elina: I don't see any clues.

Lilly: But look at all the food!

Elina: We should keep going we need to find what has been messing with the booze on the ship.

Gregory: :drool:

Lilly: :drool:

Elina: Fine I'll just head down this hall all alone you two catch up when you get done.

Lilly: :drool:

Gregory: :drool:

Lilly and Gregory procede to make a 10 foot long sub with all of the ingediants they can find in the fridge.

Lilly: Now that this is done I'm not that hungry.

Gregory: Neither am I.

They take a knife and each cut off a 6 inch section to eat and a third to take to Elina then start to wonder down the hall she took.

----
Sarah and Tirmek wander down the other hallway alone passing a portriat on the wall but failing to notice that the eyes move.

They eventually come to a library.

Tirmek: Let's split up gang.

Sarah: There are only two of us left.

Tirmek: I know you take that wall I'll take this one.

Sarah moves along the wall looking at the books until she bumps into a bust sitting on a pedastal. It spins the section of wall she is in front of and she disappears behind it.

Sarah: Jeepers!!

Tirmek: Sarah?

Tirmek searches the wall but after he is unable to find her he rushes back out into the hallway to find the rest of the group.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-16-06, 05:50 PM		In the original they weren't brought back either they were created anew. The genetist (who wasn't included in the movie) even admited that he had no idea if the monsters he created were the same as the real thing or completely different.
OOC: You're being rules-lawyery again. It was a Bunny-type joke. Recreating anything extinct = bringing back to life something he's already dealt with.
rampant

12-16-06, 06:25 PM		Demon lawyer - All right fine but first get my troops off the flagpole.

Terrek - :confused: ...(looks to his left) ...

Satnak - :D

The fiend's escorts have been hung up on a near by flag pole by their underwear. (apperently demons wear briefs)

Terrek - Satnak! You're *snicker* not *snort* helping. :rofl:
Kaizer_Ryu

12-16-06, 09:12 PM		Thorn: *long and boring monologue complete with dramatic poses and ACTING*

Ivy: *nods* Mmmhmm...facinating. Do go on.

Thorn: *speech about how feeble the heros are*

Ivy: Most enlightnening. Please continue.

Thorn: *elaboration on his entire plot to conquer the multiverse*

Ivy: Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.

Tirmek: *telepathically* You two about done? I'm not sure how much more I can take of this.

Sarah: *same* We're going as fast as we can!

Elina: *also same* When's the last time you tried doing this without being caught?

Thorn: Now that you know why you must die, your time is up.

Tirmek: Crap!

Elina & Sarah: Done!

Tirmek: Lilly!

Lilly: :zzz:

Thorn: What foolishness are you planning?

Miko: Oh for the love of- *whap*

Lilly: :zzz: :eek: Huh?! I'm up! *looks around* Oh, right.

With the quick aquisition of the spell component (a few drops of his own blood), Lilly slaps his hands onto the magic circle drawn upon the floor from Sarah and Elina's blood. It glows brightly as the mystical runes use Thorn's own Demigawd powers against him. The potent binding properties of the girls blood and Lilly's opposing magical signature combine to entangle Thorn's power within the seal.

Thorn: Well crap.

OOC: Meh. Go with it. Have it fail if you want. They're not exactly skilled at this kind of thing. Why did I do it then? Simple:

Because it's cool.
urial angel of death

12-16-06, 09:17 PM		OOC: And uses theories proven on a different nearby planet.

Invader Zim is amazing
Kaizer_Ryu

12-16-06, 09:27 PM		Invader Zim is amazing
I considered not giving you this :gift: for catching the reference (since you're the one I first heard it from), but what the hell. You get it for catching the reference so quickly.

The :gift: contains a talking Gir plushie. It's like a talking Elmo doll, but not in a "scars small children for life" way.
DungeonJman

12-16-06, 10:25 PM		Okay, i have something planned, but i need to know Ketler's age, and what year it is in YK
Kaizer_Ryu

12-16-06, 10:32 PM		The FF has been adventuring for somewhere around 10/15 years, so its something like 1008/1013. Ketler's age is up to Charles, but I really don't think it matters. He's a half-Gnome Otaku, so I'm gonna guess 50-ish.
DungeonJman

12-16-06, 10:34 PM		Wait, that makes no sense. Then he would theoretically be older than Merrix
Kaizer_Ryu

12-16-06, 10:39 PM		Merrix showed up in the Way back when series.

This thread ignores any and all things that interfere with the funny.

The FF itself causes massive time distortions.

Merrix was not described as the youngest of the Cannith House leaders till after this thread was started.

Why are you worrying?
DungeonJman

12-16-06, 10:52 PM		OOC: Because, at the very most, Aaren is only chronologically around 85 years old (although the warforged suit stops his aging, so when he took off the suit, he would appear 42 years old). So that means Ketler would be old enough to be the current Merrix d'Cannith's age (Aaren's son). And saying that he was the son of the original Merrix d'Cannith (Aaren's father) doesn't work, because then he would be about the same age as Aaren. Once again, talking OOC,despite being a character.
Rei32491

12-16-06, 10:53 PM		Just so you all know, I'm still alive. I'm just lazy. So lazy in fact, I'm having Kaizer type this as I sit on my butt.

OOKaizer: Like most of the posts you've done on this thread?

Shut up.

I really haven't had time to do anything on the thread. I haven't even been keeping up very well, so I'm formally handing over control of my characters to both Kaizer and Urial. I might come back, I might not. Don't count on it any time soon, though.
rampant

12-16-06, 11:21 PM		Tirmek - Goalg!

Sarah - Honestly, what is wrong with you!

Elina - 5 on 1 challenge match!

Sarah - You could at least invited us to Watch!

Elina - Yeah I can't believe we missed that royal butt whupping you handed them!
Lord Kale Fangblade

12-17-06, 08:38 AM		as the troops vanish into the portal, leaving only the lawyer. another form appears in the portal. he wears black robes with gold trim and in his hands holds a staff of bones, like Sa'vor he posses albaster skin and hair. also like Sa'vor he posses a powerful rune above his right eyebrow. unlike Sa'vor however his eyes are crimson in colour and his facial features are a great deal less feral.

Lawyer: My lord, i thought you would not be attending this meeting?

Drasskarr: Judgeing by the state of my troops, i thought it best if i came to oversee things. *turns to Terrek* Ah, you must be Terrek. I belive a soul that belongs to you has came into my possesion. Unfortunatly i cannot just hand him over, the politics of my people are not so forgiving and many of my opponents would see this as a sign of weakness.

Lawyer: sir is it wise we give them this much information, information that could infact be used against us?

Drasskarr: Varrus(sorcerer 25) , your points have been noted. but your paranoia is becoming much like Dispaters. it is of no use for me. so you will be silent until i tell you otherwise, Is that clear?

Lawyer: *bows* yes my lord.

Drasskarr: *turns back towards Terrek* now where was i? of course. the soul of this individual has belonged to me from birth, it is because he himself did not make this deal that he is allowed to exit my realm. but, for the transaction to be complete we must make a pact. are you willing to listen to my terms?
cypher_zero

12-17-06, 09:06 AM		Terrek: You may speak your terms, but know this: The soul of Sa'vor is rightfully mine. It has been mine since long before I sew it into his chest, and it will be mine again. You have not claim to it whatsoever, regardless of the customs of your people. Were it not for another immediate pressing concern I would have collected it by now, that you bring it now to me makes it all the easier for me. So yes, you may speak your piece, but be careful what you ask for, for you stand in my realm and my rule is absolute.

OOC: *dun dun dun*
.
Chrys

12-17-06, 10:08 AM		Aero So...

Chrys I'm not starting your plot until Miko gets back.
Lord Kale Fangblade

12-17-06, 11:21 AM		Drasskarr: i have only one term, That Sa'vor cannot reveal or inform you of any details of the future of the child Sithis. the childs future is very important, we cannot allow for it to be manipulated any further. to know any more of the fate of Sithis could be catastrophic, it could throw the balance of Law and Chaos further than we can allow.
cypher_zero

12-17-06, 11:24 AM		Terrek: This is acceptable.
.
rampant

12-17-06, 12:25 PM		Drasskar - NOW GET ME OFF THIS FLAGPOLE!!

Terrek - That girl has a one-track mind.
----------------------------------------------------------

Serene - Corre's lodged herself up on the topshelf and she won't come down.

Satnak - *telekinesis* Whats wrong Corre?

Serene - I think the demons scared her.

Satnak - You have nothing to fear from them.

Dorvos - hmmmmmm hmmm

Satnak - That's right your family is here to protect you.
rampant

12-17-06, 12:44 PM		Tirmek - Thorn's down, Ok Minions drop your magical gear and gold and we'll let you live.

Miko - Awwwww

Tirmek - Okay Doog Jr. Take anyone who's going back to the FF, the decks always need swabbing.

Miko - Wow either that was pathitcally nice or deliciously evil.

Tirmek - Anyone who stays gets a 7 way wedgie.

Thron's minions follow Doog Jr. back to the FF.

Tirmek - Still here Thorn:D

THorn - You know perfectly well I'm trapped here.

Tirmek - Ivy first.
Charles Phipps

12-17-06, 02:34 PM		OOC: Actually, a fun filled fact that never got revealed. Ketler is actually the REAL guy who invented the warforged (his backstory is that he and Aaren collaborated). As a child he was pretty much the Dexter (of lab's fame) of House Cannith. The half-gnome business is really why he stays so young (and why his house despises him with an abberant Dragonmark).

Aaren relationship to Ketler has never been detailed. However, for the purposes of the thread. Terra and company killed the original Merrix patriach, ketler is technically the son of the original but raised by Aaren until he fell into the crew around fourteen (Jarlot being half-fiendish and well over a century old)

The current Lex Luthor like Merrix probably has had his brain replaced with the originals or is building death rays or laughing about being the Bill Gates of Khovaire.
DungeonJman

12-17-06, 03:53 PM		*as he is leading Aaren into the town of Throneport, DungeonJ reads the post above this one*

So wait a minute that means,

*brain breaks for a second then returns to normal*

Oh great, by that logic, Ketler is technically the heir with the greatest legal claim to house Cannith, and could take it over, by law if he wanted to.
rampant

12-17-06, 05:32 PM		Teiza - Geh!

Terrek - How did you get here?

Teiza - Hahahahaha!

Terrek - Your Parents are probably very worried.

Teiza - :D

Terrek - Typical.

Rashour - Jeeze again?

Terrek - Again?

Rashour - Little git has been ducking the play pen since Sis put it up. Sometimes all you have to do is blink and she's outta there.
Charles Phipps

12-17-06, 05:39 PM		Ketler: Sweet!

Terra: But you have an abberant Dragonmark. Doesn't that disqualify you?

Ketler: Maybe.

Terra: What is your Mark?

Ketler: The Mark of Chibi.

Terra: What?

*Ketler raises his hand which glows*

*Terra becomes a 1 foot tall chibi http://ic1.deviantart.com/fs10/i/2006/129/0/9/Chibi_Witch_by_Majokko_Vivi.jpg *

Terra: Ketler....start running.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-17-06, 06:07 PM		:rofl:

IC:

Terra: Evan's Spiked Tentacles of Forced Intrusion!

Ketler: :eek: :eek: :eek:

*please enjoy these pleasant images of kittens-*

Ketler: GAH! THAT DOESN'T FIT THERE!

*-romping in a field of flowers while-*

Ketler: NOT THERE EITHER!

*-the spell takes it's course.*

*Rip, Shred, Tear, and Mittens are shown playfully hopping about, chasing dandelion seeds and butterfiles as happy music masks the sound of Ketler's wails of agony*

Ketler: OH YE GODS THE PAIN!

*Thank you for your patience. We will resume normal viewing shortly.*

Ketler: (i.h.h.) Maybe I could make a schema of this for later. :plotting:

Terra: I heard that.

Ketler: :eek: :weep: :eek: :weep:

Terra: :lop: Just for that thought, we're doing this once more. This time covered in itch powder and chili. :devil:

Ketler: :help: :ghosted:

*Maybe not. Stay tuned for an important message from Dragonmeat Den, proud sponsor of your local chapter of Covering Hentai Images with Cute Kitten Scenes (C.H.I.C.K.S.)*

Inevitable of bad puns: :hoppingma WHERE IS HE!

OOKaizer: :hides:
Chrys

12-17-06, 06:08 PM		Aero: Greatest dragon MArk EVER!; For get the bait we are going to take him! :love:

Chrys Er... I think part out my brain just broke:eek:
urial angel of death

12-17-06, 06:21 PM		The inevitable of bad puns finds OOKaizer hiding under his seat.

Inevitable: Now to deliver justice *draws sword*

OOKaizer: Please spare me! (i.h.h.) atleast long enough to get my link costume.

*flash back to the inevitable's childhood*

The inevitable is much smaller and standing in front of a larger version of himself who has a mustache. Between them is a puppy.

mustache: Now this is an important part of your training. Kill the puppy.

inevitable: But daddy it's so cute.

Mustache: Kill the puppy.

Inevitable: No!

Mustache: Kill the puppy!

*end of flash back*

Inevitable: Oh I can't kill you. *throws sword over shoulder* All you mortal creatures are so fagile and adorable *hugs OOKaizer*

OORei: *behind inevitable with sword sticking out of his stomach* Anybody gonna help me? Anybody at all?
Kaizer_Ryu

12-17-06, 08:12 PM		Lisa: :cloud9: *snuggle* Oh, you're just adorable! *snuggle* :cloud9:

Terra: :blush: :D Maybe this isn't so bad...

Ketler: :weep: I hurt in places no man should know he has... :weep:
Chrys

12-17-06, 08:23 PM		Chrys Chibie Loven is the pure form of love of all...
Paulon

12-17-06, 08:49 PM		Aero: Greatest dragon MArk EVER!; For get the bait we are going to take him! :love:

Poor Spoony. Getting dumped in favour of Ketler. That's got to HURT. :evillaugh
rampant

12-17-06, 09:10 PM		Lily - I can feel myself getting more lame by association!

Tirmek - No you've always been that way.

Elina - Zing

Lily - Everybody hates me!

Izzy - Nobody likes you!

Sarah - I geuss you should go eat worms!

Lily - :weep:

Teiza - Grrrrrrrrrr (i found these they're my bait!)
DungeonJman

12-17-06, 09:39 PM		Theoretically the Abberant Mark should disqualify him, but then again, since he was never officially excommunicated from the house, and no one has the authority to excommunicate him as of this time, he still holds the greatest possible claim out of the remaining House Cannith heirs.

* Ketler writhing in pain says*

Ketler: How did you not notice what just happened?

DungeonJ: My mind has a backup failure protocol, that when something against the laws of nature is being commited, i instantly blank out towards it, sort of like how Elina blanks out about how she's going to be the Shadow's champion. Plus, i'm in Throneport, which makes a good question on how i'm talking to you.

*in a puff of logic, the discussion ends*

Aaren: So, am I being arrested or what? Not that i don't mind the stalling.

Oh no you don't, the courthouse is right over there.

Aaren: :banghead: :raincloud :weep:
Charles Phipps

12-17-06, 09:57 PM		Ketler: Sweet, when I reunite the House my first act will be to resolve all war with mecha.

Aaren: Oh not you again!

Ketler: Think about it. Every warforged juggernaut will have a young kid pilot competing in order to settle battle through ritualistic duels rather than ridiculous wars of attrition.

Aaren: You're ripping off a Gundam most people never even saw!

Ketler: Oh and by the way, The Lord of Blades is a sucky machine.

Aaren: Is not!
DungeonJman

12-17-06, 10:12 PM		I would just like to say, that the warforged suit isn't really a mech, because it actually stops him from aging, and turns him into a warforged for all respects while he's wearing it, it's more like a magic item, than a pilotable construct.

Aaren: So there!

OOC: Just out of curiousity, why has no one edited the wiki in a while?
Kaizer_Ryu

12-17-06, 10:21 PM		OOC: Just out of curiousity, why has no one edited the wiki in a while?
Because we weren't getting any new meat that fit in for some time.

Because we got bored with it.

Because the characters that are in use most have extensive multilayered plots that are difficult to sum up, and most of these plots are ongoing and near impossible to describe in a summary.

Because we forgot about it.

Now replace "we" with "I" (as in me, Kaizer_Ryu), and you've got at least part of the reason. :embarrass
Charles Phipps

12-17-06, 10:36 PM		Yes, a shocking revelation. If you want the wiki updated then YOU THE PLAYER must post your characters and their summaries. I also think the RPG.net wiki si down.
rampant

12-17-06, 10:37 PM		Corre - Weeeeeeee tinsel!

Teiza - hehehe

Dorvos - Geh!

Corre and Teiza have gotten ahold of a shape wood wand and stuck Dorvos in the mast, to finish the job they decorated him as a dol dornmas tree.
------------------------------------------------------------------------

2 minutes later

Satnak - I don't know whether to be angry or impressed.

Serene - How did they get the keel in there?

Jarlot - There is pine tree in very uncomfortable places, get me out of here!
Kaizer_Ryu

12-17-06, 10:56 PM		Elina: What should we do with him?

Tirmek: Why not just leave him here?

Sarah: You know how seals are. He'll invariably come back at some inopportune moment.

Sithis: I may have an idea...

Walking over to the piles of discarded campaign settings, he pulls out one that looks like it was written by someone who learned how to write by reading a bunch of highschool text messages.

Thorn: *anime sweatdrop* What are you doing with that?

Sithis: :devil:

Unable to move, Thorn is helpless to defend himself as Sithis opens the book in front of him. The vortex of pure suck rips out the ground around him, dragging both Thorn and the intact seal into the maze of plot holes, grammar violations, and spelling errors. As soon as Thorn's screams die away, Sithis closes the book tightly.

Sithis: Boo-yah.

Miko: ...he's gone?

Sithis: Yep.

Tirmek: What do we do with the book?

Elina: Flame Sphere *book disintegrates* There.

Lilly: ...now what?

Sarah: :D LOOT THE DEN OF EVIL! :D

All: HAI!
rampant

12-17-06, 11:25 PM		Upon Return to the FF

Tirmek - Heh, they're good.

Elina - This is insane!

Sarah - Like he said.

Miko - I feel outclassed.

Teiza and Corre - :D

Serene - You two are staying right here!

Lily - Ok how did they get you?

Earl - :shifty:...I don't wanna talk about it.
rwarner3701

12-18-06, 12:13 AM		The wiki still works for me... http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Main_Page

As for it not being updates see Kaizer's reasons and add work and school for some of us. Not to mention that there will likely be 3000 posts before the end of 4 months for this thread which is a bit to handle. Also most people who do get involved would rather post than copy and paste to the wiki so that is what happens.

I have though about going back to put this threads contents up or at least some descriptions for the newer characters but haven't gotten around to it.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-18-06, 01:25 AM		Lisa: What did you find?

Sarah: :shifty: Nothing.

Lisa: It was a dungeon of an evil overlord. You had to have found something.

Elina: :shifty: Nope. Nothing worth mentioning.

Terra: Then what's that?

She points to a sack at least five times the size of the girls, obviously bulging with treasure. The words "Bad-guy dungeon lootings" are written on it.

Elina: :shifty: Um...stuff...

Lisa: Stuff? What kind of stuff?

Sarah: :shifty: Just stuff.

Terra: *telepathically to Lisa* :) Dol Dorn-mas presents?

Lisa: *and back* :) Yep.

Terra: All right, girls, if you say so. But you both did very well for your first full adventure without us. We're very proud of you.

Sarah & Elina: :D

Lisa: Now go get cleaned up. We have a holiday to prepare for. And watch out for Teiza and Corre. Those two mischief makers are on a rampage.

Sarah takes off excitedly, but Elina hangs back a moment.

Elina: Sorry if this sounds like a weird question, but are both of you feeling ok?

Terra: :confused: Um...I think so?

Lisa: Why?

Elina: *shrugs* Oh, never mind then.

Sarah: *from the hall* Come on, slow poke!

Elina waves and runs of after her sister.

Terra: :confused: Do we look like we don't feel well?

Lisa: :confused: I don't think so. *shrug* If it's something we should worry about, she'll tell us.

Terra: Well, I'm gonna give Lilly his performance review. I was pleasantly surprised. Too bad about Mordain, though. I wanted to see how they would have beat him.
rampant

12-18-06, 02:49 AM		Lisa: Now go get cleaned up. We have a holiday to prepare for. And watch out for Teiza and Corre. Those two mischief makers are on a rampage.

OORampant - You ain't seen nothing yet!

OOKaiser - Ha hut ha!!

OORampant - Ouch!
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Sarah - Whats she doing?

Elina - Watching a bird nest.

Sarah - Awww she's so cute.

Elina - She's less cute when you realize she's going to eat the birds.

All of a sudden

Corre - Ahhhhhhhh!

Corre, pursued by a mob of various redshirts, dashes behind Teiza.

Teiza - :confused: :mad:

Redshirt35 - Uh oh,...I was kind of hoping I'd die with clean pants.

Black crysthral erupts from between Teiza's shoulders and forms sharp blades on her tails, talons on her feet and hands, and finally lenses over all 12 open eyes.

Teiza tears into the redshirts relying on ferocity and number of blades, and intimidation, to overcome her lack of training.

Sarah - Jeeze...

Elina - I didn't know spines bent that way.

SNAP

Sarah - Apperently they don't.

Corre - Grrrr

Corre encouraged by her sister's sucsess, leaps into the fray cutting off retreat. Unlike Teiza, her Red Crysthral forms whips that lash out over the remaining redshirts.

In 5 seconds the fight is over. In 5.0000000001 Serene and Satnak are at the scene.

Serene - We need a new play pen, honestly! I can't turn around for a moment without you two disappearing somewhere.

Satnak, noticing the stain of blood and battle before Serene does, forms an ectoplasmic barrier around the twins, which also blocks the scene of carnage.

Satnak - This time I'm setting the cats on you two.

Sarah and Elina - Ooh the cats!

Satnak - Fine you can come ask your parents first. A few more eyes can't hurt.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Later

Satnak - I think we need to start training the girls to fight.

Serene - They're not as mature as when we started with Dorvos.

Sound of punching bag creaking.

Satnak - But they are more independent then he was at that point. They can't stand hanging around in one place very long. They are always getting in trouble. They've already had to defend themselves once. They can inflict so much damage on a person, they need to know how to fight so they have more options than run or kill.

Serene - Today with the wall...

Satnak - It was pretty grim.

Serene - Oh gods!

Satnak - Please, calm down, this is why we should teach them. They need to understand what they are capable of and how to use it.

Serene - Yes, you're right. I just hate the idea of my little girls being killers.

Satnak - Defenders not killers. Borisheel means Gaurdian.
Charles Phipps

12-18-06, 04:10 AM		Lilly: Too bad that bag was filled with feminine products.

Ivy: Sure it was brother.

Lilly: In any case. I wonder how we'll ever be able to defeat Mordain.

Ivy: I'm sure he's quite dead.

*malevolent laughter from 5 feet away*

Lilly: I raised my wisdom again. Is Mordain right beside me?

*five feet over is the Lich*

Ivy: Yes.

Lilly: We'll deal with him later.

Jarlot: HEY EVERYBODY! I WON THE ELECTION!

Lilly: No one voted.

Jarlot: Then I won because I locked Rose in the gameroom and am declaring myself Captain before killing anyone who disagrees.

Lilly: What's he doing anyway?

Jarlot: He's playing Twilight Princess for a week straight. He's already beaten it like eight times. I think it's driven him insane. Zella mostly is staying for the sex.

Lilly: eww.

Jarlot: Oh well. In any case, glad nothing has changed since my absence.

Lilly: Rose negotiated our pardons from the government, diplomatically brought peace, and managed to pay damages for all of our evil deeds. We're legitimate now and at last can live normal lives.

Jarlot: Ummmm...

*Sharn blows up in the distance*

Lilly: Inaugerating your election I see.

Jarlot: Actually that was a joint attack by King Steve, me, and Tony Blair.

Tony Blair: Jolly good invasion what what?
DungeonJman

12-18-06, 07:54 AM		*in a courtroom, Aaren d'Cannith stands in handcuffs, in the defender's box without his warforged suit. Despite him being older than Ketler, he looks very similar to him (consider that he did not age in the warforged suit)*

Judge: Attention, this court is now in session.

Aaren: Your honor, may i ask a question?

Judge: Yes?

Aaren: Why are there only representatives from Karrnath and Thrane here?

Judge: Because Cyre is a blown up wasteland, Aundair's new king is too busy rearranging the government, plus you never got far enough to attack them, and King Steve is just too lazy to send a representative.

Aaren: That, sadly, makes perfect sense.

Judge: *mumbles under his breath* Don't I know it. */mumbles under his breath*

Then let us proceed with the trial.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-18-06, 08:17 AM		[various acts of annoying babyishness]
13: You have met one of my many über-evils. And there is always the teenage years. :devil:
Aero: Greatest dragon MArk EVER!; For get the bait we are going to take him! :love:
13: Told you he needed a girlfriend.

Silver: You make it sound like a bad thing. :mad:

13: Since when have you ever cared how whipped they are? :bored:

Silver: :D
********
OOcat: Jarlot is captain? :eek: Awww. Can I still do Spoony Jokes? :bigeyes:

Maivy: SpoonySpoonySpoonySpoony. :cheer:
Chrys

12-18-06, 09:51 AM		Miko is walking back to her room with her share of the loot. When all of the sudden she is tackle-hugged by an over zealous Aero.

Miko: Let me go you freak!

Aero: You should talk like to your older sister! Now be ‘good’ or I’m going to spank you

Miko: So what if you’re my sister?

Aero: Well I’m going quest to lose my paladin-hood and become Lawful evil with have to be a stupid Blackguard or a spoony bard; and your coming with me

Miko: Hey I’m not stupid…

Aero: I was talking about the whole Fallen Blackguard thing now hush and let me finish!

Miko: Why should I listen to you! You’re what all of CR14 at the most!

Aero: Because I’m the Older Sister and I’m a Full Outsider therefore I’m in charge!

Miko: * grrrrrr * Fine what are we doing?

Aero: Well first when need to pick up that spidery thing and Ketler.

Miko: Why Him?!

Aero: One I like the power of his dragon mark, two he is a good artificer, three who else am I going to find to repairs on two Hellfire engines, Four he is soon to be head of powerful house I can use for our own infernal plans And He is sort of cute.

Miko: Sorry I think I just threw up a bit in my mouth…

Aero: This coming from a woman with fetish for one of spoony’s kids.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

12-18-06, 10:21 AM		Jarlot: HEY EVERYBODY! I WON THE ELECTION!

Lilly: No one voted.
...

*Sharn blows up in the distance*

Lilly: Inaugerating your election I see.

Jarlot: Actually that was a joint attack by King Steve, me, and Tony Blair.

Tony Blair: Jolly good invasion what what?

Ash "Weeeeell people did vote, but Balot destruction isnt a very precise sience."

Cole "Boom!"

Ash "and I think you'll find King Steve's invasion is still deploying."

Jarlot "So what belew up Sharn?"

Liam "The Wiersian Psionic amplifyer, well, it rater exseeded our expectations on the second test"

Ash simply smiles, donning dark glasses.

Chanse "So Captain, do you need avfirst mate?"

Jarlot "I thought that you had your eye on my hat Random?"

Chanse "Me, versus spoony, I can deal with him. Me versus the Son of Kyber and even half of the rst, no hope. So I rembered a wise old changling saying. 'If you cant beat them, change sides.'"
rampant

12-18-06, 11:15 AM		13: You have met one of my many über-evils. And there is always the teenage years. :devil:

Satnak - :twitch:
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Satnak - Figured out how they've been getting out.

Serene - Well?

Satak holds up a struggling Teiza with prismatic wings.

Satnak - She's been using flight melds when we weren't looking.

Serene - How did you catch her this time?

Satnak - Despite the wings this is a combat meld not a mobility meld. Rookie mistake.

Teiza - Totemist
Kaizer_Ryu

12-18-06, 11:36 AM		King Steve: *standing over the rubble that once was Sharn v6.0* Oops. Did I forget to tell Jarlot my plan to destroy Sharn was a joke? Oh well. Ok, men. Find the survivors! Show no mercy!

Advisor: Um...my Lord? Are you sure that's a good idea?

King Steve: It was a joke, see? Wait...did I forget to tell them that?

*the sound of civilians being massacred can be heard all around*

King Steve: Ah, well, I hope they remember to bring me any treasure they can find. It's about time these foreigners learned their place!

Advisor: Uh...my Lord, you do know that Sharn was one of OUR cities, right?

King Steve: Guards, kill him.

Advisor: :eek: *runs*

*bloody slaughter ensues*

King Steve: Oh for the love of-! Can't you people read my mind?! It was a joke! *sigh* No one appreciates a royal sense of humor...
urial angel of death

12-18-06, 12:08 PM		OOC: Volrath: Just a warning to everyone my entity has become obsessed with drowtales.

OOUrial: Yeah the remakes are being updated again!!! :D

Volrath: So its influence may come up every once in a while.

reallyOOC: Soon I will finish with Stewie in the twenty years later.
urial angel of death

12-18-06, 12:47 PM		OOC: I can't for the life of me remember the name of the child Chrys created for P/Y/R. Can someone tell me please?
Chrys

12-18-06, 12:58 PM		Chrys Ishtar, Babylonian Goddess of War, Sex, Magic, fire/Summer, Slime.

Ishtar Gooo

Translating Slime And She would appear more if I new how old she is.

Chrys Don't I forgot the other three :embarrass
urial angel of death

12-18-06, 01:03 PM		OOC: There are actually five in total plus one secret one.
rampant

12-18-06, 02:26 PM		Ketty - Impressive, I wonder if Corre...

Satnak - No, I checked. Even Elina went over her, she doesn't carry Incarnum potencial.

Ketty - She has good form though.

Satnak - Serene is teaching her to dance, seems to help. Teiza has no patience for it though.

Teiza - *Sniff Sniff* Got you shred!

Shred darts out from a houseplant.

Shred - Meow (every time!)
-------------------------------------------

Corre - 1 and 2 and 3 and 4

Serene - Very good!...Tear you need to work on your step.

Tear - meow ( meh! )
----------------------------------------

Dorvos is playing a flute while Mittens sleeps on his head.

Dorvos - dooooooooooooo det dooooooooooooo det det doooooooo

Mittens - purrrrrrr (zzz)
rampant

12-18-06, 06:16 PM		Ok Is it safe to put that craziest E.B.N.E. award up? I've been waiting for Silver or Chrys to pull something.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

On the deck of the FF, Corre and Dorvos are putting on a little show. Teiza is dancing to Dorvos's music.

Serene - They're so talented.

Satnak - I know its amazing.

Teiza - YOU! Stop perving on my sister!

Ketler - :hides:
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-18-06, 06:16 PM		The masses of the OOcat are assembled before a cliff on which there is an outcrop for being easily seen in front of a veiled cave. They appear to be chanting something, raising a left appendange each time they do.

Masses: Legend of Zelda, Legend of Zelda…

The veil is pushed back from the cave and a hunched figure in all-concealing robes steps out, holding something in its hands like a very thin book.

Masses: …Legend of Zelda, Legend of Zelda…

The figure starts moving slowly toward the outcropping.

Masses: …Legend of Zelda, Legend of Zelda…

The figure reaches the outcropping.

Masses: …Legend of Zelda, Legend of Zelda…

The figure reguards the assembled masses for a moment, it's cloaked face sweeping back and forth across them.

Masses: …Legend of Zelda, Legend of Zelda—

The robed frigure suddenly raises the object in its hands. The masses silence in an instant.

The object shines. It is a game box.

Robed figure (oration): Comrades! Long have we awaited this day, the day when we may delve into the mysteries of a great, spanning Zelda game. Yea, I say unto thee, I have the Zelda, and it is good………really good. Especially the bits where you get to be a wolf. And someone really did a nice job on those light spirits.

Masses: *cheering*

Robed figure: And I promise unto you, I shall do some "Spoony as a wolf" jokes, in honor of this game.

Rose: Now hold on a minute—

13: It's not like anyone's going to care much, seeing as how Jarlot won the election. Now we need a werewolf……

Rose: :eek: Hold on there……

Maivy (wearing a really funky headress): Be sarcastic, be sarcastic……

OOC: No mentioning any game details, please. I had Ocarina of Time ruined in that way.
urial angel of death

12-18-06, 06:42 PM		OOUrial: *fidget*

OOKaizer: What's wrong with him?

OORei: All of the stores are out of wiis.

OOKaizer: Is it really that bad?

OOLugwrench: Hey guys.

OOUrial jumps up and sinks his teeth into Lugwrench's throat.

OORei: Yes it's that bad.

OOC: Nothing against you Lugwrench I just need a redshirt.
Charles Phipps

12-18-06, 06:48 PM		The real question is, of course, who is the real Link? Is it Kaiser Ryu or Rose.

Zella: Oh it's simple actually. Rose is Classic Link. Lilly is Ocarina of Time Link. Kaiser is Legend of Zelda 2 link.

Kaizer: What? I'm the SPOONY Link?

Rose: This is what you get from sleeping with Zelda.

Zella: Now move your but and rescue me Rose. Mordain kidnapped me again.
DungeonJman

12-18-06, 07:32 PM		A random redshirt is walking among the quarters when he sees a new door. This door has several padlocks and chains on it, and a sign over all of those saying "Beware of Leopard". Thinking that it contained a device that someone in the crew didn't want somebody else to have, he quickly unlocked the locks and opened the door. Only to find a man in a suit and sunglasses.

Redshirt: What the ???

Agent Smith: DIE!!!

*with that, he jumps out and attacks the redshirt, turning him into another smith. The two smiths then begin looking for other redshirts to infect*

DungeonJ: (i.h.h. Why did the "Oh no, for the love of goodness, Smith's been let loose" mental alarm go off? Meh, probably nothing.)

OOC: Note, this is the REAL Agent Smith, not a Kanatash Smith duplicate.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-18-06, 09:35 PM		Kaizer: What? I'm the SPOONY Link? :weep:

Rose: This is what you get from sleeping with Zelda. :D So totally worth it.

IC:

Elina: Hey, Mom?

Terra: Yes honey?

Elina: Sarah and I were talking, and we wanted to know if we'd ever get wings like you.

Terra: Of course you will!

Elina: :D Really?!

Terra: Actually, I'm a bit surprised you both don't have them already.

Elina: Why?

Terra: You two are the first of your race. Lisa and I have been more or less winging it the whole time. When you develop different things is really an unknown.

Elina: Awwwww...

Terra: Tell you what. Get Sarah and I'll see what I can do. I might be able to tell you roughly how far off they are.

Before she even finishes, Elina is out the door and on her way to find Sarah.

OOC: I'll do the rest in a bit. Stupid real life. :mad:
urial angel of death

12-18-06, 10:36 PM		Terra: You two are the first of your race. Lisa and I have been more or less winging it the whole time. When you develop different things is really an unknown.


OOC: Yes concordant killers are here!

IC: Rose Regis hated his job. No one ever took his seriously. They did think of public relations head as a real profession. He was always delegated to some odd job no one else wanted, and everyone called him spoony. He wasn't gay damnit! His type of people needed freedom and room to work their magic, but he was constantly stiffled. Worst of all now he was forced to be a tour guide to some group of "scientists" his employer hired.

Rose: Why hello everyone! How are you doing?

Terrek: Just fine I was told you'd show us around.

Rose: Right this way to the labs. *whispered* Jack***

OOC: For the record I know you guys don't mean gay when you say spoony
Kaizer_Ryu

12-18-06, 11:19 PM		OOC: Yes concordant killers are here! :confused:

IC:

Terra sits with one hand on each of the girls backs, concentrating.

Terra: Hmmm...fascinating...

Sarah: What?

Terra: Well, at first I couldn't find any trace of wings when I looked at where they should be developing.

Elina & Sarah: :weep:

Terra: But then I looked at the flow of magic running through each of you. From what I can tell, you should have wings. You just don't.

Sarah: What do you mean we 'should'?

Terra: The magical patterns in you indicate your bodies want to have wings.

Elina: Is there something stopping it?

Terra: Hmmm...:doh: Of course! Dumb, dumb, dumb! I can't believe I missed that!

Sarah: Um...missed what?

Terra: I had to manifest mine before they took full form. They tried to appear several times on their own before I figured out how. Maybe that's what needs to happen with you two.

Elina: Can you show us?

Terra: It'll take some time to get used to. Probably at least a month before they even appear, longer to be able to really fly. We'll begin as soon as you're ready.

Sarah & Elina: :bigeyes: :D

Terra: *anime sweatdrop* Uh...I guess that'd be now?

Sarah & Elina: *vigorous nodding*
rampant

12-18-06, 11:32 PM		Tirmek - Finally! My shoulders thank you!

Sarah - You had to bring that up!

Dorvos - Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrt

Serene - No no hun we can't fly with that shape try this one.

Dorvos - *Shifts from bug-like wings to a more expansive pattern*

Serene - Of course it takes a bit of pratice... He's already crashed into the galley hasn't he?

Tirmek - The salad bowl to be specific.

Mittens (on Dorvos's head) - meow ( next time hit the fish )
Kaizer_Ryu

12-18-06, 11:43 PM		For those of you wondering what training Terra has been putting Lilly through, this (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0391.html) sums it up quite nicely. :D
rampant

12-19-06, 01:37 AM		Dorvos - Meh! gaaaah!

Tirmek - Steady Dorvos! Flying is half confidence! Just trust your teachers and yourself. It'll come.

Sarah - Easy for you to say Meldshaper!

Tirmek - I never claimed to be an expert on growing wings.

Satnak - Ok Dorvos I'm gonna let you go, and you fly to mommy. Got it?

Serene (standing at the opposite end of the deck) - Come to mommy Dorvos.

Dorvos - Hmmm

Sarah - You know that would probably work better if Mittens wasn't on his head.

Elina - Yeah, it would be a good idea to put him down.

Dorvos - (:rolleyes: to look at Mittens)

Mittens - :bored:

Satnak - I don't see that happening any time soon. Ready?

Dorvos - *nod*

Satnak - Ok go!

Dorvos makes a few clumsy flaps with his purple crysthral wings then settles into a smoother pattern, and finally a glide into his mom's hug.

Serene - That was amazing Dorvos! On your first day!

Sarah - Geeze!

Elina - I know, its almost as if some enigmatic force is taunting us.

Lily ( riding butter cup in circles around the mast about 20 ft above the deck ) - Thats just crazy.
Charles Phipps

12-19-06, 02:32 AM		Gregory: Ahem.

*knock knock*

*sounds of Lisa and Terra's cabin rocking*

Terra: GO AWAY!

*knock knock*

Lisa: We humbly request you to leave.

*KNOCK KNOCK*

*grumbling noises, sounds of tentacles flailing, growls of the damned*

*CREEEEEEEEEEKKKKK*

*Lisa opened the door*

Lisa: Yes Sir Gregory?

Gregory: I regret to inform you that certain circumstances have rather drastically altered the circumstances of your disposition to the rest of the world.

Lisa: Huh?

Gregory: The manure has hit the windmill my Princess.

Lisa: Oh.

Terra: DAMNIT! I HATE WHEN WE'RE INTERRUPTED!

Gregory: The Queen of Thrane is dead.

Terra: Wait, what?

Lisa: Oh my god! How?

Gregory: Most foul and odious murder!

Terra: Well just bring her back.

Gregory: I fear that is impossible. She was struck dead with a Fang of Khyber. Her soul will not appear even in the Dead Lands or the Silver Flame but has gone to a realm beyond them.

Lisa: Who....who did this?

Gregory: Our suspicions are that it was done by the Argentum.

Terra: What the hell would the Thranish magic collectors want to kill mother for?

Gregory: They are not merely mageshop collectors or even spies. They are the personal agents of the ruler of Thrane to do whatever needs be done to safeguard the future of the world.

Terra: Damnit, SPEAK!

Gregory: She objected to a Black Crusade against your daughter Elina.

Terra: I'll destroy the entire nation!

Lisa: TERRA!

Gregory: You wield absolute magical might and authority on the world Terra for you are perhaps the strongest being in all of Eberron. However, the matter you should concern yourself with is not the stopping of that secret police. Misguided and wicked I think they be.

Terra: .....Where the hell did you learn to talk like that?

Gregory: Paladin's School. They teach grammar you know.

Terra: SPEAK UP!

Gregory: The Prophecy of the Promise Breaker foretold in the Dragon Scrolls that are part of every Thranish canon.

Terra: Yeah, they say the Child of Khyber shall be born. He shall bring great destruction then the Promise Brea....

Lisa: Oh my! They think our daughter is the Keeper of the Black Flame? She who will destroy Eberron on her sixteenth birthday?

Gregory: Yes. They have passed her name out and words to every corner of Eberron and also to the Sovereign Host. I fear not for your daughter's safety in a literal sense. She is mighty beyond imagination even without your protection. It is that I fear she will find herself hated and loathed in every corner of the continent.

Terra: I see.

Gregory: I am sure it is a misunderstanding milady. Even if it were not. I will never let anyone harm an innocent.

Terra: Go away Gregory.
Charles Phipps

12-19-06, 02:44 AM		OOC: Once more Urial, I love your future stuff. You should give a brief rundown on what's going on since parts are seperated though. I was alittle confused at first.

IC:

Thranish Court

Aaren D'Cannith: You fools believe that I am guilty! Well I say NAY! NAY! NO PRISON CAN HOLD ME!

DungeonJman: You're being charged with war crimes Aaren.

Aaren D'Cannith: HA! I have the best lawyer in the world coming to assist me! He just lost his job as Captain.

DungeonJman: Oh no.

*ROSE GALAN, ATTORNEY AT LAW enters the room*

*He for some reason has a pair of Wings of Flying on his back and otherwise is aping Birdman*

*Rose pulls out a doll and screams*

Rose: WHERE DID THE PALADIN TOUCH YOU!?

Aaren D'Cannith: The trial hasn't begun yet!

Rose: WHERE THE HELL DID HE TOUCH YOU!? He can't get away with this! Justice will be served!

DungeonJman: *jawdrop*

Judge: Mr. Galan....

Rose: Before this trial begins, I'd like to point out that I don't recognize the authority of this court.

Judge: No problem.

Dungeonjman: What?

Judge: I'm not actually a judge. I'm an actor playing one.

DungeonJman: I knew I saw you in Beverely Hills Cop!

Judge: Don't forget Gremlins.

Rose: My first witness is George Lucas.

DungeonJman: The hell?

*George Lucas takes the stand*

Rose: Do you admit that the Star Wars Prequels were a collection of recycled ideas, shameless CGI, and awful writing?

George Lucas: No, I think they're the best movies I've ever made.

Rose: TAKE THIS MAN TO THE ASYLUM FOR THE INSANE! He cannot be held accountable for his actions.

Judge: Sustained.

*George is dragged off*

DungeonJman: Eberron law is a bit different from our law.

Rose: Now I'd like to introduce my assistant Jonny Cochrane.

DungeonJman: On second thought, it's exactly the same.

Ketler: I'd like to take the stand now.

Rose: Where?

:rimshot:

Ketler: I'd like to state now that I want to have sex with Jaela and it's NO LONGER A CRIME! HAHAHAHAHAHAH!

Rose: Did you ever witness Aaren D'Cannith building weapons of mass destruction.

Ketler: Yes.

Rose: Your honor, I rest my case.

Judge: You do realize you're the defense right?

Rose: I'm paid just the same either way.

Aaren D'cannith: :twitch:
Charles Phipps

12-19-06, 03:16 AM		Mordain Fleshweaver: *sips his drink* Ah, this is the life.

*The Lich is dressed in a floral print shirt as beside him under an beach umbrella is the Unnameable horror*

The Unspeakable Horror: Can I come out now?

Mordain Fleshweaver: NO!

Igor: Why have we returned sir may I ask?

Mordain Fleshweaver: My hordes of undead are already prepped. Now to prepare for phase two.

Igor: You made up the undead plan on the spot.

Mordain Fleshweaver: I also had a 1000 step plot that I discarded when I could take over the world in one swoop.

Igor: What's step two?

Mordain Fleshweaver: I'll show you. Hey Ivy?

Ivy: Yes?

*The warforged clanked over*

Mordain Fleshweaver: Would you like to be human again?

Ivy: WOULD I!

Mordain Fleshweaver: Then, here, let me blow a wish from my Ring of Three Wishes on you.

*He mutters something and Ivy finds himself once more restored to being a young boy*

Ivy: YES!

*he dances about and then runs off to meet his brother*

Igor: What was the point of that?

Mordain Fleshweaver: Oh it's simple, Jarlot was able to escape his destiny by bringing about the Mourning in order to kill the spirit of Khyber inside him.

Igor: I'm not sure I follow you.

Mordain Fleshweaver: It's a demon Igor. Demons are immortal. They're reborn whenever they die.

Igor: And...

Mordain Fleshweaver: Little Ivy was born the day of the Mourning. Now the prophecy may restore itself. The Flesh of the Flesh of the Chosen One of Dol Arrah will become the Chosen of the Keeper. The brothers shall battle and one shall kill the other.

Igor: Hilarious sir.

Mordain: Isn't it? This event will shape Lilly into being the hateful broken man he is in the future....or he will die and Ivy can bring about the future that Miko has come to bring....a world where mankind is wiped clean from the Earth for the perfect world of Siberys children that she will replace them with.

Igor: Whose life do we ruin next?

Mordain: I'm thinking on it. There is one eternal constant to the universe. One cannot escape destiny.
DungeonJman

12-19-06, 08:03 AM		Well, either way this trial goes, i'm not responsible for it, i'm just the law enforcer, not the judge.

*Randomly appears in front of Gregory*

Everything that you said depends on how you look at time, Gregory.

Gregory: :confused: How did you get here?

Why does no one accept that a semi- E.B.N.E. can do this when the plot requires it !?
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-19-06, 09:09 AM		Bunny: Never liked using Fangs. :yuck: It never really feels like killing to me.

13: So now we have two insane plots involving champions of the dark gods?

Silver: In my defense, Murphy was crazy.

Bunny: Tell us something we couldn't see with our eyes closed.

Silver: The sheer mechanics—

Bunny: NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR THAT!

Silver: Anyway…

*WHAM!*

Gregory (suprano): :mymy: Ow.

Silver: No one interrupts them, got that? Even if it's important information reguarding the possibility of their daughter being loathed. Narrative element it. I spent a lot of time on that one—

Bunny: What part of "Don't tell us" do you not understand?

13: Well, I'd better get back to the trial. I've got Aaren nicely set up by now.
Mordain: ……There is one eternal constant to the universe. One cannot escape destiny.
Bunny: :rolleyes: I'd say that's a complete lie. Death never plans ahead. Makes it so much easier to surprise people that way.

Silver: Then I take it that this "Wiping humanity off the face of Eberron" has you realy steamed.

Bunny: Do you know how much work that is?! I can't focus on the quality having to do that many people!
DungeonJman

12-19-06, 09:36 AM		Well, seeing as Gregory doesn't understand the full problem, it's not like it matters. Now if my plot had worked, then you guys and Gregory wouldn't have to worry about it.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-19-06, 10:54 AM		Well, seeing as Gregory doesn't understand the full problem, it's not like it matters. Now if my plot had worked, then you guys and Gregory wouldn't have to worry about it.
It wouldn't have worked regardless because you do not understand what it is you are dealing with any better than Gregory. Even if Elina had a 'dark side' worth speaking of and she had faced it down, nothing would have changed. It has little to do with what may come to pass.

Your assumption that it was her desire to be better than everyone else that caused her blank out or allowed the Shadow to possess her or whatever is incorrect. She never said anything about wanting being better than anyone else, and the Shadow does not possess her in any way, shape, or form. Her blanking out is not directly related to her getting any closer to becoming the Shadows champion, either.

There are layers within layers in this plot, and quite a lot is not as it appears. For instance, Queen Elina knew full well that Miko would not be able to competently facilitate her corruption.

And that's just the beginning.

IC:

Still in their room, Terra leans against the wall with her face buried in her hands as Lisa sits on the bed.

Lisa: Feeling better?

Terra: Yeah, sorry I freaked out. I think it was too big a shift. But how about you? We just found out your mother was murdered!

Lisa: I...I don't know. I don't think it's really sunk in yet.

Terra: *sits next to her* :( And then there's Elina...

Lisa: It can't be her. It just can't be! How could she be?

Terra: To the casual observer, helping rekindle the Silver Flame would be unnerving. And then to have survived an onslaught by it without a scratch, then seeming to overpower it would be terrifying.

Lisa: But that's not what happened...!

Terra: *hug* I know, I know...

Lisa: What do we tell them?

Terra: ...we have to tell them the truth. I don't like it any more than you do, but there's no real way to soften this blow...

Lisa: *sniff* I feel so helpless... It feels like we've failed our daughter spectacularly...

With those feelings finally spoken, the two simply break down. The weight of the situation hits them full force as they sob into each other's shoulders. Now is the time to grieve. They would need to be strong for their girls in the coming trials.
DungeonJman

12-19-06, 12:12 PM		Well then OOKaizer, you obviously haven't noticed the implication of my second plan.

OOKaizer: being?

Tell enough things away that it somehow messes everything up. Wait, what the...

New Rules:

X:I don't care if you wanted to do it for the sake of annoying him, none of you are allowed to play DungeonJ's music.

X+1: Why? Because none of the ubers like listening to Gilbert and Sullivan or Bob Dylan, that's why!

X+2: Even if I am the Pirate King.

X+3: Under no circumstances is this ship being renamed the Down-Easter Alexa, i don't know what you were doing when listening to that music that would make you think so.

X+4: Despite them knowing a lot and commanding a huge army, no one on this ship is to EVER play "I am the very model of a Modern Major General" when Sa'avor or Feal-thas is around.
rampant

12-19-06, 12:13 PM		In the astral plane.

Angel of Mist and Stone - The pieces fall into place. Then that rebellious bloodline shall be put to rest.

Henefer - I'm right here, ass.

Aomas - Shut up.

Henefer - Oh thats real original.

Aomas - Of all the villians I've ever used *speak with dead* on you're the snarkiest.

Henefer - Thank you.

Aomas - That wasn't a compliment.
Chrys

12-19-06, 12:32 PM		Chrys: Right Ok you have every one?

Aero: Yes…

Chrys: Good because I don’t want to have to repeat this again. Ok There is a large Island and on this island are two huge blue and Green gem stones. Destroy the green one and enslave those natives around the Blue until the Blue one takes on a purplish tint. Then you will be Lawful Evil and I’ll tell you what your new class does.

Miko: That sounds a bit two easy…

Aero: Oh come on what’s the worst that could ha…

Chrys: Did I fail to mention that his island is also the breeding ground for those Feathered Serpent thingys.

Aero: Can I kill them?

Chrys: I don’t see why not.

Aero: Good I HATE Those…

Miko: Why?

Aero: They keep trying hit one me.

Miko: … :eek: :mymy: :twitch:
urial angel of death

12-19-06, 01:04 PM		OOC: Kaizer if you are planning on using Gregory for any fighting realize he is dex based. Also know that should he get cut he will immediately run away, while trying to conceal his cut. One last thing he bled silver before Elina corrupted him in the future.

I will work on a summary for the future.

Also is it still okay for me to write Stewie's final fate or is it too long gone.
Charles Phipps

12-19-06, 02:28 PM		OOC: Go ahead with Stewie.

And I hope you like our use of Gregory Urial. He's a fun character but takes a special kind of plot to use.
Norr

12-19-06, 02:37 PM		Inevitable: Oh I can't kill you. *throws sword over shoulder* All you mortal creatures are so fagile and adorable *hugs OOKaizer*

OORei: *behind inevitable with sword sticking out of his stomach* Anybody gonna help me? Anybody at all?

Squirrel Thing - :uh-huh: We're fagile? :rofl:

OOC: yes, yes, I know, I know. Don't hit me.
Charles Phipps

12-19-06, 03:23 PM		Bunny: :rolleyes: I'd say that's a complete lie. Death never plans ahead. Makes it so much easier to surprise people that way.


Mordain: Well DUH. Do you think the one universal truth of the universe is going to be SHARED by a Lich. HELLOoooooo evil Undead King who thrive on secrets here!

Bunny: Then why say?

Mordain: It depresses good guys. Hello! Bad guy here!

Silver: Then I take it that this "Wiping humanity off the face of Eberron" has you really steamed.

Mordain: We all have our hobbies. It's not just killing people but scaring the crap out of them. *Sees one of Marish's kittens* BOOGAH BOOGAH!

Wolverine: *slices through one of his bony legs*

Mordain: Things were so much easier when I hosted Tales from the Crypt.

Bunny: Do you know how much work that is?! I can't focus on the quality having to do that many people!

Mordain: A word of advice. There's no job not worth doing half-assed.

Admiral Murphy: Amen!
rampant

12-19-06, 04:14 PM		Scene: Dorvos's bedroom : Sheet music is strwn about the floor, several instrument cases sit on shelves on one side of the room, accross from them lies Dorvos's bed and mitten's litter box, A box of various sparing gear and toys lies at the foot of said bed.

Dorvos is waking up to face the day.

Dorvos - fraf phfftb gah (i.h.h. cat hair!)

Mittens - yawwwwwn

Dorvos - meh (turns over to go back to sleep)

Mittens - Meow (stabitty)

Dorvos - eeep (i.h.h. I'm up! I'm up!)

-------------------------------------------------------------

Out of the shower (wearing a towel you gutter brains)

Dorvos takes the time to comb his cat and what ever hair has managed to stick out from under mittens.
--------------------------------------------------------------

Breakfast

Dorvos - gak bak phfftb ( i.h.h. Cat hair!)
Kaizer_Ryu

12-19-06, 08:49 PM		Lisa: I thought you said this'd take at least a month?

*SMASH*

Terra: I seem to be really bad at judging learning time anymore.

*CRUNCH*

Sarah and Elina are each sporting a small pair of translucent wings. After the news had sunk in, they decided to take out their frustrations in a duel in their demi-plane. Craters, broken trees, and smashed rocks litter the area as the girls go to town.

*BASH*

Terra: But they still can't fully manifest them. Good thing too.

*CRASH*

Lisa: No kidding. Look at them go. I can't even imagine adding a third dimension to this.

*KABOOM*

Terra: Can you blame them? It's not every day you find out you or your only sister is the most wanted being on the planet...

*in the battle*

Elina: :weep: :mad: Why? Why me? What'd I do? *stab*

Sarah: *dodge* You didn't do anything and you won't. They'll see that. *punch*

Elina: *parry* :weep: :mad: They seem certain enough to want me dead. *strike*

Sarah: RRRRRAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Elina: :eek:

Sarah: So are you just going to whine, or do something about it?!

Elina is sent flying through a tree before recovering. She lands horizontally on the next tree and propels herself back at her charging sister.

Elina: I will not just roll over!

The force of the impact ripples through the trees as everything goes silent. When their parents find them, they lie next to each other, unconscious. Terra and Lisa each pick one up and prepare to head back to the FF.

Terra: I'm still at a loss for what to do about this. We have our responsibilities, but we can't bring her with us.

Lisa: Nor can we leave her alone...

Terra: I believe this is a case of 'damned if we do, damned if we don't'.
Charles Phipps

12-19-06, 09:06 PM		Elina: I can't believe they think I'm an Apocalyptical Bad Guy!

Miko: *GLOMP*

Elina: What are you doing?

Miko: Sorry, it's the world destroying aura. It's just so HUGGABLE!

Elina: I repeat...Miko...you creep me the frick out.

Lilly: Hey, is this where we're practicing flying comabt?

Terra: Lilly, you don't have wings.

Lilly: Au contraire, I am the Chosen One of a deity and thus shall manifest them as well.

*concentrates*

Terra: Lilly, I don't think that's how it works.

Lilly:...I feel...something....

Terra: You look like you need a laxative.

*Lilly pops out wings*

Lilly: YES!

*They're the girliest butterfly wings you've ever seen*

Elina, Miko, Sarah: *giggle*

Lilly: Mirror...

Lisa: They're not so...

Lilly: *Joker voice* MIRROR!

*Lilly takes one look in the mirror before bursting into insane horrified laughter*

Buttercup: Giggle.
Charles Phipps

12-19-06, 09:19 PM		Rose: Ivy, are you okay?

*in the dark of his room where Ivy lies on the bed, even Rose's elven sight can't pierce the dark*

Ivy: Yeah, I'm...fine. Just leave me alone.

Rose: Want me to get the healer?

Ivy: No...I'll be fine.

*Ivy is left alone even as he crawls out of bed to see the terrible black wings stretching from his back as he coughs up blood once more*

Khyber: The transformation is slow and painful but you should not fear it.

Ivy: Why me? Why not Lilly?

Khyber: Your brother hates you. When he chose to become a paladin, he never bothered to imagine that one of you would be sacrificed to the darkness for his crime. He did it before when he tried to ressurect your mother and you paid the price for it. He's a cruel and evil man. Now you must embrace your power to protect Elina from him.

Ivy: That's....that's not true! My brother is my best friend.

Khyber: Your best friend whom has ignored, abused, and exploited your friendship at every turn. You whom were a machine could only watch as he indulged his carnal appetites to pursue the girl you secretly loved.

Ivy: No! No...no...

*Another wing rips from his back*

Khyber: You are the Chosen One of the Keeper. It is your place to protect the Chosen one of the Shadow. I can give you everything you've ever wanted if you'll embrace it.

Ivy: Who are you?!

*Khyber's voice reveals itself to be Achika*

Ivy: NO!

Achika: Yes, I am your mother. The avatar of darkness. I bore Jarlot long ago and then I bore you and your brother.

Ivy: Mother...

Achika: Hush. When your brother is dead then I can restore him to life. Then you will be able to be with him and we will defeat this prophecy. The restored Lilly shall join the Dragons of Darkness and cease to be the slave of the Light. If you want to be a family, accept my touch. Do you want to be a family?

Ivy: *crying* Yes.

Achika: Then feel the full weight of my power.

*Achika kisses her son as black energy pours down his mouth and muffles his scream*
rampant

12-19-06, 09:23 PM		a few inutes later

*knock knock*

Lisa - I don't think it's a good time.

Tirmek (from the other side) - Hello? Its me Tirmek,...

Terra - ...

Sarah - huh? wah! I'm up! where's breakfast? Tirmek!

Terra - On the other hand, it might be a good idea to have friends near in a time of crisis.

Lisa - Actually Tirmek might just know what Elina is going through.

Elina - Huh?

scritchaskratch

Terra - I've been wondering where those scratch marks have been coming from.

Lisa - (opens door) Our doorframe is not a scrathing post.

Tirmek - (with alot of bruises) sorry

Sarah - Grraaaaaaah! You won't believe what they're doing to Elina!

Tirmek - I have had a very bad day, unless a kill on sight order has been released shut your noisehole!

Terra - Please tell me they're not going to -

Smashowcrashouchcrunchnotthefacebangwhat chitskuggafoomcrammityouclangmyeyesblamm getoffofmepop-various other sounds of battle

later in the infirmary

Tirmek - So basically everyone wants her dead.

Sarah - Yeah can you believe it?!

Tirmek - ... You're kidding right? Anywhere on the home plane but the island I'd be executed just for existing as a half-breed. If my lineage as either legacy clan or as son of Toren was discovered, they'd soulburn me to oblivion.

Sarah - Oh:embarrass

Elina - How do you... how do you stand it?

Tirmek - By refusing to be what they want me to be. I refuse to become the knightmare prince, because its what most expect of me. I hate them for it, but I cannot let myself become consumed by it or I prove them right. They want me to be a monster so they can justify the atrocities against my ancestors, so if I truly wish to hurt them, i must never become a monster.
urial angel of death

12-19-06, 09:25 PM		OOC: I saved Stewie's fate on a comp I will not have access to until tomorrow so that will have to wait.

To summarize the way far future. Terrek and Terra are both archeologists (sp) working in arabia, whom just recently uncovered the Nameless City. They work for a reincarnation of Kanatash who is using their finds to create a park full of Mythos stuff. Nalfien is still alive from the current timeline as a lich and also works for Kanatash. Nalfien can only partially remember his past because he has been alive so long that he started to forget further than fifty years in the past. Ketler is a computer promgrammer who works for Kanatash by keeping track of his enormous computer network. Reman is yet again a a lawyer this time representing Kanatash's investors. Finally there is Rose the multi-media and public relations head of Kanatash's park, think liberal arts graduate. They have all be called to Kanatash's park for unknown reasons.

I'll need to detail Volrath's remaining siblings and half-siblings soon.
urial angel of death

12-19-06, 09:36 PM		Gregory: *walking into the dark room* Ivy are you okay? I heard you screaming.

Voice: I didn't scream.

Gregory: Yes you did. It was so loud it bounced around my hea- oh ****!

Voice: You must be very gifted.

Gregory: I, I... *runs away*
Charles Phipps

12-19-06, 09:54 PM		Rose: Hmmmmm.

*pops open his Scrolls of the Prophecy of the Dragon found in every Church Canon*

*Moves to Scroll 7*

The Prophecy of the Second Demon War

Chapter Seven

1. Lo, that shall the Second Demon War be forseen by a series of signs. A time of unparalleled darkness that shall sweep across the land and lay waste to the world. A conflict between good and evil that shall be the decisive choice between law, chaos, good, and evil. Where one future shall rise of knowledge and peace or one of chaos and entropy. These two futures shall be woven by the hands of destiny to collide and mortal choice shall decide which will reign forever after.

2. The first sign shall be the miscengation birth of the Final Emperor of the Great Kingdom of the Western Continent. He shall lie with a maiden that is the Dragon Below's comely form and from their union shall birth a mortal man carrying the spirit of Khyber. Each of the Sovereign Dragons shall bear fruit and multiply as the seeds for their children shall be taken from families from thousands of years in the past.

3. A conflict of one hundred years shall sunder the Great Kingdom and it shall end when the Child of the Dragon does battle with his twin. A nation shall perish in cold and leave its people forsaken of all love. From that day forth he shall bring chaos and conflict with demons.

4. The birth of the Promise Breaker shall see seven signs proceeding it...

5. The Ship of Chaos shall be created by sorceries most fair and foul. Gathering its crew forth from the cruel, insane, vile, and tempermental. Their shirts dyed in the shade of blood, they shall be hounded by godlike beings that care little for them.

6. The Ship of Chaos shall become a sight feared by every navy and nation with the Weightless City laid low by them many times.

7. The Ship of Chaos shall journey into the chaos beyond time to destroy a Great Lord of the Daelkyr.

8. The Ship of Chaos shall journey forth into the Realm of Dreams to strike at the Dream of Darkness.

9. The Ship of Chaos shall lay low the mighty King of the Rakashasa.

10. The Ship of Chaos shall both free the Serpent King that lives in the Flame and break him.

11. When these seven signs are fulfilled then the Promise Breaker shall be born of no man. She and her sister shall be destined to be dire enemies with the world falling under her sway before slow death if she reaches her sixteenth birthday. The enemy of all mankind, her heart will bear a demonic shadow and she shall be known as the Queen of Shadows.

12. A champion of the just and good shall be born alongside a champion of the horrific and evil. From the line of the Queen of the Elves on side and darkest Khyber on the next, the brother who chooses good will condemn the brother who chose neither to abomination. They shall battle and the winner shall hound or aid the Promise Breaker to her destiny.

13. The Daughters of the Mightiest Witch of the Ogres shall be lain low before the Promise Breaker's Sixteenth Birthday as by their hand shall they reveal the raising of the Goddess Between. The first of those Sovereigns that pay homage unto neither good or evil. The goddess whom shall be known as the Dah Terra the Gardener.

14. The Blackest Wizard shall lust after the Whitest Mage as their union shall be accompanied by much beating of heads and speaking of foolishness.

15. The Lich Queen and the Lich King shall conspire to corrupt the most innocent born of the most powerful. Under friendly guises they will torture and shadow until they bring ultimate destruction.

16. The Mark of Death shall be reborn on an innocent girl whom has already suffered much betrayal by her own flesh and blood.



Rose paused "Damnit! I'm not even freaking in this!"

OOC: Please note, there's a big surprise about this prophecy ahead. I hope none of you have seen Scrapped Princess.
urial angel of death

12-19-06, 10:13 PM		OOC: Why is it the Bunny doesn't like violence without killing, yet Silver loves sex without babies.

Also as a foreword to my current timeline story here: Sorry Bunny.

IC: Abel: Cain you think we're in there. *several thorns pierce Abel's neck*

Cain: Possibly brother. *withdraws thorns from Abel's neck*

Abel: *regenerates his ruined throat and returns to life* Why do you do that?

Cain: I don't know. We can ponder it while we search for our elder brother.

Abel: We are to meet the Avatar of Change?

Cain: Yes, don't you remember the prophecy father told us?

Abel: Not really. *vines stangle him*

Cain: Well maybe regenerating will jostle your memory. It is fortold that all the avatars of life must gather together to confront the avatars of the Children Gods. That is why we must see him, to fufill our duties as the avatars of vegetation and animal life.
Charles Phipps

12-20-06, 12:12 AM		Training Room

*Aerith spreads her wings as she appears, Elina and Sarah are exhausted to one side*

*Lilly has been fighting a couple of summoned magical constructed monsters*

Aerith: Hello Lilly.

Lilly: Hi Gramma. What's up?

Aerith: I must share my power with you.

Lilly: Ewwwww.

Aerith: Not that way!

Lilly: Oh good.

Aerith: I need to give you the power of the champion of Dol Arrah.

Lilly: Why?

Aerith: The Champion of the Shadow is coming to kill you.

Lilly: Sweet! Finally, an evil doer to kill!

Aerith: Lilly...it's your brother.

Lilly: What?

Aerith: *stares downwards* The power of Khyber has started to infect him. He's....transforming.

Lilly: No, that's not possible.

Aerith: It is not by his own choice but the attack of something....

Lilly: It's a F***ing lie!

Aerith: Call upon the power when you must Lilly. It will come to you.

Lilly: GET THE HELL OUT OF MY FACE!

***

Terra's Room

Terra: I need to go talk to Rose about these stupid prophecies.

*She enters the room to find a transformed Ivy, no longer the normal boy from before but now a sixteen year old with beautiful white wings even as his face is hardened in utter hatred*

http://x-nihon-x.com/saku/fuma15.jpg

Ivy: Hello my dear Aunt.

Terra: Ivy, what....DAMN HER! DAMN HER TO HELL! THIS IS KHYBER'S DOING!

Ivy: Don't be upset. I've merged with my full power. I am now a Dragon Champion of the Night Below. It's not that problematic. I feel no different really. Just....more clear on how the world works.

Terra: I'll drive this out of you.

Ivy: Yes, you whom are exactly like my brother will save me. You who forewent your destiny and sacrificed her own daughter in order to escape her becoming the Shadow's champion.

Terra: THAT'S NOT TRUE!

Ivy: The irony was that Lilly was the one meant to be the demon. These beautiful white wings were meant to be mine rather than the hidious ones disguised by illusion.

Terra: I DRIVE YOU OUT DEMON!

*she throws her most powerful spell directly at him*

*Ivy is thrown backwards even as he spreads out his wings and halts his movement against the ground*

Terra: No.....that's impossible.

Ivy: I am immune to even magic of the gods. The blood of Khyber flows through my veins.

*Ivy moves quickly and pierces Terra's chest with his Claw of Khyber an artifact blade of incalculable evil power*

*Terra chokes out blood*

*Ivy then places his hands around her and Inflicts Supreme Wounds upon her that crackle as black lighting through his blade that continues to impale her*

Ivy: I cannot kill you.....that is only by the power of the Dragon Below but you will not interfere with me.

*Terra cannot move before she slumps unconscious*

Ivy: Now to claim my bride in Elina.

***

The Deck

Ivy: Lilly, how pathetic. You haven't even changed yet. This won't even be a contest.

Lilly: Oh Gods Ivy, what have they done to you?

Ivy: The gods have nothing to do with it.

Lilly: Let me help...

*Ivy blasts Lilly across the ground and slams him through a nearby wall as he's barely alive*

Ivy: Pathetic, not even most of my strength.

Elina: Ivy! What's happened to you!?

Ivy: I am the Child of the Dragon Below. The destined servant of you my Lady. To use the power of the Claw of Khyber to defend you until you may take your rightful place as ruler of the world.

Elina: What!? I don't want that!

Ivy: Want is irrevelant? Will you be like your mother and consign your child to this fate? Perhaps your sister will be cursed with nightmare and torture until she breaks. But you never paid me a bit of attention either.

Lilly: Ivy...*spits blood* *gets up with his broken bones* Did you come to fight or to give an Emo rant. Ha, all bards are the same!

Ivy: Perhaps you need more incentive.

*Lisa walks on the deck before she's then struck by black magic that sends her spiralling on the ground, riddled with boils from the horrific black magic attack*

Elina: MOM!

*Ivy holds a blade to Elina's neck and draws blood*

Ivy: I loved you Elina. You never realized this....so I'll just state this kindly. There's enough human in me left that I'll fulfill your wish and make sure you never become the monster you fear.

Lilly: IVY! DAMN YOU! DOL ARRAH! HELP ME!

*a crackling painful transformation takes over Lilly as terrible wings shoot out his back, marking him as a monster that was meant to serve the Dragon below*

http://x-nihon-x.com/saku/kamui07.jpg

*He two becomes like sixteen*

Lilly: You...b*stard.

*His sword has become a Fang of Siberys*

Ivy: Let's duel.

*both reveal their true wings by CHOICE than birth with Lilly's white and Ivy's black*

http://x-nihon-x.com/saku/kamui&fuma35.jpg

*the two brothers clang their blades together even as Lilly doesn't fight to full capacity as he holds back against his brother despite being the more skilled*

*The sudden massive clerical powers of Ivy mix with bardic taunts and hatred that drive each blade insanely forward*

*Storms collide over the Thranish sky as they fight beyond the ship*
rampant

12-20-06, 12:31 AM		Tirmek - ENOUGH!!! You two have no say in the matter! That is their choice alone! Destiny is a paradigm who's time is done! I am living proof, I am Tirmek d'Tharmis Son of Ketty d'Tharmis, I am not the Knightmare Prince, I am THE SAGE OF THORNS! Elina, you are my friend, you have withstood such machinations already. These wretches can't control you!

Elina - They're hurting my family!

Tirmek - Then take them down!

Elina - But, they're my friends!

Tirmek - Since when do friends attak each other's family like that? *activates a split meld of Winged rakshasa & d'Tharmis thorns* *incarnate warhammer* *call warhammer* *sheild* *inertial Armor*
Charles Phipps

12-20-06, 01:35 AM		OOCharles: I wonder if she'll notice that only Ivy is attacking.

Tirmek: ....I'm hoping she won't figure that out until he's dead.

:-)
Kaizer_Ryu

12-20-06, 02:15 AM		OOC: Hope this is what you had in mind, Charles.

IC:

The clash of blades ring out as Ivy viciously drives Lilly back. Lilly on the otherhand seems reserved. Obviously the stronger, he holds back out of a vain hope his brother will come to his senses. The look on his face shows he is slowly coming to the realization that only one of them will walk away.

Sarah: Watch it!

A cast off blast of energy heads towards the deck, passing just above it as Sarah tackles Tirmek to the ground.

Sarah: Dammit, Tirmek! This is no time to play hero!

Tirmek: So we just sit here and wait for one to die?!

As they argue, Elina kneels over her mother, trying desperately to heal the wounds. Blood still leaks from the cut Ivy gave her, but she ignores it as it stains her clothes. The battle above takes on a new intensity as Ivy grows impatient with his brother's reluctance. The Claw of Khyber protrudes from Lilly's shoulder, smoke billowing from the clash of good and evil.

Ivy: Come on, brother. Give me all you can. You'd best fight to kill, or you will be as guilty as I am for the coming darkness.

Lilly grabs the blade and pulls it out with his bare hands as Ivy smiles evilly. The Fang of Syberis glows brightly in his hands as he accepts at least this part of his destiny.

Lilly: Very well, brother. Perhaps this is the only way I can free you...

The tide turns, and turns hard. In half a dozen blows, the Claw of Khyber is shattered. His arm broken, Ivy can only dodge and wait for an opening. It never comes, as Lilly next blow sends him flying over the deck of the FF. Elina stares at Ivy's back as he regains his control, only to be run through as Lilly charges. A few flecks of blood spatter her cheek, mixing with the tears.

Ivy: *cough* It seems *spits up blood* you win, brother. *grins* Heh. You always were the better fighter...

Lilly removes his blade and comes down hard across Ivy's chest. The dark energy flowing through him bursts forth and dissipates. As he dies, Ivy's form returns to normal and crashes into the deck. Sarah and Tirmek stare uncertainly at Lilly as he lands next to Ivy. He knew Ivy would never be back. The power of Khyber had shredded his soul upon it's release.

As Lilly and Sarah mourn Ivy's loss, Tirmek brings up a very good question.

Trimek: Where's Elina?

-----

She hadn't done anything. She didn't want any part of this horrid fate she had apparently been dealt. She was a good girl. She listened to her parents and worked hard. She wasn't mean or nasty. She loved her sister and her friends. But now, by some cruel twist of fate, even Lilly was after her life. She had seen what Ivy had done to her Momma. Her Mom hadn't even shown up, which meant something had happened to her as well. Lilly had killed Ivy so easily. She stood no chance against people like that. She was left with only one choice:

Run.

And run she had. The only way she could. She fell through the skies, trying to figure out her next move.

Kitsune: Do you plan on dying?

Elina: *shakes her head* :weep: I don't know...

Kitsune: You might as well have let Lilly kill you if you were planning on committing suicide anyway.

Elina: ...can you help me fly?

Kitsune: Of course. Follow my lead.

With a little effort, the back of Elina's shirt tears away to make room for a pair of black-feathered bat wings. She catches the wind and sails off into the sky as Kitsune guides her movements. Where she would go, she didn't know, but she needed to get as far away from Lilly as possible...

OOC: Just FYI, no interfering with Elina at this time if you haven't ok'ed it with me or Charles.
Charles Phipps

12-20-06, 02:22 AM		Tirmek: YOU B*STARD!

*Tirmek grabs Lilly by the shoulders as he reverts back to human*

Tirmek: I'll kill you before you harm Elina! You killed your own brother to kill her!

Lilly: *tears streaming down his eyes* That's not what happened!

Tirmek: THEN WHAT!?

Lilly: I WAS TRYING TO PROTECT HER! I was trying to wound....I didn't mean to kill him!

Tirmek: *drops Lilly* Pathetic.

*Lilly can only stare at his brother's face as he stared in horror*

Sarah: I.....

She knew that Lilly hadn't had time to think in battle, his instincts had taken over after denying them for most of the battle. Ivy had left himself wide open and Lilly had taken the opportunity without thinking about it.

Achika: So it is done.

Lilly: YOU....MONSTER!

Achika: The irony is that one of you had to die at the other hands. That was the ultimate protection of the Promise Breaker. To remove her from the grip of her friend and loved one. Either you or Ivy, whomever was the good was meant to be the stronger and kill the evil weaker one. Now she fears all who purport to serve it.

Lilly: I'd never hurt her!

Achika: After you killed your own brother?

Lilly: *falls into a fetal ball*

Achika: Now the first steps into bringing her to her destiny have begun.

*Achika changes before the groups eyes as five heads rise from her body of red, green, black, blue, and red in a nightmarishly gargantuan dragon that spreds her wings and then flies off*

Khyber: Farewell my son.
rampant

12-20-06, 02:28 AM		Tirmek - I thought she was braver than this.

Sarah - Hey don't you go bad mouthing my sister!

Tirmek - If she didn't want one of them dead she should have done something about it! Personally I'm just dissapointed Lily won.

Lily - HEY!

Sarah - Like She could have stopped them!

Tirmek - WE could have! No matter how strong they get Ivy lacks training, and Lily couldn't outmanuever a legless spider!
Charles Phipps

12-20-06, 02:43 AM		Lilly: Whatever Tirmek.

Tirmek: Huh?

Lilly: You're a Prince of the Rakashasas and a godlike being. You're better than me. FINE. Congradulations. I'm sure I'll never get high and mighty enough to comb your fur.

Tirmek: ....

Lilly: Now that's settled could you show some ****ing respect for my dead brother?

*pause*

Lilly: I have to go find her.
rampant

12-20-06, 02:59 AM		Tirmek - :twitch: Lily, I will forgive you once!

Lily - Forgive ME! you arrogant-

Tirmek - I am no prince, I am no demigod. My power is from training and study. The few powers I posess as part of my outsider heritage is no more, and no less than any other half-breed. You have more celestial power from bloodline than I have fiendish. In fact the only reason you're not stronger than me is; I work harder. Now can we focus on the problem at hand.

Lily - You cold hearted bastard!

Tirmek - That's it precisely. You let your emotions control you, and you end up being manipulated. That's what happened to Ivy, and that's what is happening to Elina.

Sarah - Still...

Tirmek - If you can do something for him, do it! If not then save your moaning for later! We need more data, see if we can't get Terra and Lisa Stabalized.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-20-06, 03:25 AM		Terra slowly awoke in a pool of her own blood. Her body felt cold, and she could not yet move as she heard hurried footsteps. The sound echoed in her ears. She couldn't even determine the direction they came from, or if they were even anywhere nearby. Her sight was still clouded, and the hands and tentacles that picked her up felt like pins and needles on her skin as she fell back into darkness.

-----

Hours later, she awoke again in the infirmary. Her body had begun to repair itself after Mickey had stopped the bleeding. As she struggled to focus, she could see Sarah sitting next to her.

Sarah: Hi, Mom. Uncle Volrath found you and brought you here.

The memory of what had transpired came back to her. She immediately tensed, trying to sit up but was unable.

Sarah: Don't move! Ivy did a number on you. Mickey said you need to rest. Even you can't recover from something like that very quickly. And try not to talk.

She looked around, trying to see who else was with her, wondering where Lisa or Elina were.

Sarah: Momma was hit hard by Ivy as well before Lilly took him down.

That was more than enough to get her up. Sarah jumped up to stop her from getting out of bed.

Sarah: Momma's gonna be ok! Please, lie down!

As she does so, Sarah continues.

Sarah: It'll take her some time to recover as well, but Ivy wasn't trying to kill her. He just wanted to get Lilly to fight him. There...are a few other things you should know as well. For starters...Achika was Khyber.

Terra: *sitting up* WHAT?!

Sarah: Don't talk! *eases her back down* But...yeah. Something about this whole setup was designed to push sis further towards her destiny. And it may have worked. She's gone...

It took the combined efforts of Sarah, Volrath, and Mickey to stop her from leaving. Her struggles gave way to sobs as she lay there. She couldn't protect Lisa. She couldn't protect Elina. She hadn't even been able to protect herself. All her efforts had come to naught. She could only hope that when she found Elina it would not be too late.
DungeonJman

12-20-06, 07:56 AM		Ok, i've had quite about enough of this junk, since plan A and plan B didn't work here's plan C

(i.h.h. Man, i have to start using my better plans first, but then again, considering what this one does)

*pulls out a gun with all of the flashing lights, making it look like something Ketler would make*

NOBODY MOVE OR I FIRE !!!

Tirmek: And?

This isn't an ordinary gun, it's an anti alchemist/artificer gun, specified for Norbaz, so if i pull the trigger, anything created by him that involves magic (and no, not the chili, although it will never have become sentient) will cease to exist, and will never had existed.

Tirmek: AND?

I'm pretty sure that Lisa and Terra will know what's going to happen if i fire this thing, go ask them and if they don't realize on the first time, mention something about "truth wine"

*in his head*

Law inclination: ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR SELF ?!!?!

Good Inclination: When you say that i think you mean "are we out of our mind". Well, there is a perfectly good explanation for this, which needs to be done for the greater good, thus temporary needing to push out lawfulness

Law Inclination: I hate it when you use logic on me.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-20-06, 09:10 AM		14. The Blackest Wizard shall lust after the Whitest Mage as their union shall be accompanied by much beating of heads and speaking of foolishness.
OOC: :heehee

Nalfein: We haven't even gotten to that scene yet! :mad:

OOC: Al right, all right. :rolleyes:
**********
Nalfein finally catches up with Linda.

Nalfein: (ihh Okay, Nalfein, you can do this.) Oh, hey, wait, please.

Linda: Can I help you?

Nalfein: We were talking back at the magic shop.

Linda: Ah, yes, the dangerously destructive little man.

Nalfein: Well, please, I want to ask you a question.

Linda: I guess there can't be any harm in that.

Nalfein: Okay, now bear with me, this may be a little weird.

Linda: Go on.

Nalfein: Is your name Zelda?

Linda: No.

Nalfein: Because, baby, I'd like to get Linked to you.

Linda: ……………………

Nalfein: ;) *double-point*

*WHAM!*
***********
Nalfein: Wait!

Linda: I'm not going to dignify that with a response.

Nalfein: Please, just give me a minute to explain!

Linda: You have thirty seconds.

Nalfein: You know, you're very graceful, even with those heavy robes on.

Linda: :embarrass

Nalfein: But you'd be an acrobatic goddess with them off.

Linda: :blink: ……………………………That was just pathetic.

Nalfein: :bored: I know. The entity writing this is terrible.

Linda: Still…………*WHAM!*
**********
After several more terrible pick-up lines which cannot be recorded here do to lack of skill on my part:

Nalfein: Organs……crushed. Bones……broken. Brain……hemorraging. Heart……gone anyway.

Linda: Stupid Healer's oath.
***********
Lily - You cold hearted bastard!

Tirmek - That's it precisely. You let your emotions control you, and you end up being manipulated. That's what happened to Ivy, and that's what is happening to Elina.
OOcat: :twitch:

13: They broke it.

Silver: They so broke it.

Bunny: Shall we run away in screaming terror?

Silver: No, we'll be fine.

OOcat: What in the name of pure Chaos is wrong with you people?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Tirmek: :bored: *anime sweat drop*

OOcat: "Control, control" you wheedle. But that's not what you do! You suppress your emotions, stamping them down when you don't want them. :mad: That's not control, and it's a darker path than ever letting your emotions out.

Tirmek: :confused: Excuse me? We should let our destructive emotions rampage freely?

OOcat: Do you really enjoy battling them every day?

Tirmek: Answering a question with a question only makes things murkier.

OOcat: You think that people can be manipulated because their emotions are predictably triggered. This is correct. But people can be fully manipulated without any emotional involvement: logic, if properly twisted and made to sound believable, can still be employed. Not everyone has the smarts to see through that. In the end all you end up with is a battle that won't protect you in the long run.

Tirmek: It would have protected Ivy, and it will still protect Elina. Because it's protected me.

OOcat: So you are going to control their emotions for them?

Tirmek: You're just trying to bait me. You're trying to control me through my emotions.

OOcat: That question could control you through your logic as well. What the question really asks is "How much control turns into tyranny?" How far are you willing to go to ensure the safety of people and the world? If Elina chooses to give in to her emotions, will you decide to control them for her?

OOC: Yes, this is what I think, born from years of experience where controlling my emotions led to nervous breakdowns. In the end I decided that I wasn't going to control myself, wasn't going to try to control others, and wouldn't let them control me. I've felt better ever since.

And sorry, this is kinda what happens when you people do drama.
rampant

12-20-06, 10:55 AM		Tirmek - Just because I control my emotions doesn't make me a frigging Vulcan. Screw logic too, i'm just saying don't run into a situation half cocked. Shut up Lily!

Lily - I didn't-

Tirmek - You were about to make a crude joke. Anyway I feel my emotions, I just don't become consumed by them.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-20-06, 11:02 AM		Meanwhile, as everyone ignores DungeonJ and his 'so-not-going-to-work' gun:

Sarah: I've been thinking, Tirmek, and I've come to the conclusion that you don't know either of us half as well as you think you do.

Tirmek: Simply because I think you shouldn't let your emotions control your actions?

Sarah: *WHAP* :mad: HELLOOOOOOOO?! Berzerker here! What do you think I do every day?! The joy of battle, the surge of emotions, this is what drives me forward when I fight! Letting my emotions run wild is an integral part of who I am! Are you saying it's really that bad?

Tirmek: I...

Sarah: And what about Elina, huh?! Do you have any idea what she's going through right now?! Of course you do! She is marked for death by just about everyone in this realm. The only difference between you two is she didn't grow up expecting it!

Tirmek: Oh, and running away like that really solved everything!

Sarah: :rant: SHE'S GRIEVING, DAMMIT! As far as she knows, the whole world is out to kill her, knows what she looks like, and will do so without hesitation! She felt safe here till last night! In her mind, Lilly is more of a threat to her than all the others combined! You saw what happened!

Tirmek: I don't care how much power th-

Sarah: :hoppingma DON'T GIVE ME THE HIGH AND MIGHTY SPEECH! We wouldn't have stood a chance and you know it! They were channeling GODS for crying out loud! Does it even occur to you how frightening it was to her to see her destroyer face to face, killing her protector?! Do you realize how much it hurt her to know that her greatest foe was one of her best friends?!

Tirmek: That's not set in stone! She just gave up!

Sarah: :headexplo :weep: IVY'S FATE SEEMED PRETTY WELL SEALED!

With this, Sarah takes off, leaving him alone with his thoughts.

-----

Elina had made her way to a remote alcove in southeastern Khorvaire. Exhausted from flying so far, she had found a cave and fashioned a crude shelter for the night. The events of the previous day still weighed heavy on her heart, but her most pressing concern was the boils. Large, painful black welts had appeared in several locations across her body. Another worry was her wings. Shortly after sprouting, the feathers had begun to fall out. She couldn't dispel them like her Mom, either. Her entire body seemed to ache.

Elina: What's happening to me...?

Kitsune: You are changing.

Elina: ...into what?

Kitsune: A being like your cousins.

Elina: NO!

Kitsune: You can deny it if you like, but the mantle will fall on another. They may also deny it, but eventually one will succumb. Until one does, the pain and destruction around them will only continue. You have only dear Terra to blame for this position you've been put in.

Elina: :weep: It's not Mom's fault!

Kitsune: Oh, but it is. You are taking her place as the Chosen one of the Shadow. She rejected her destiny and forged a new one, leaving you, her 'precious daughter', to carry the burden.

Elina: *shaking her head* :weep: No...it wasn't like that...she never meant for me to be like this!

Kitsune: You are like this and you have to deal with it. Your parents are not here to protect you. Your friends are unable to comprehend what is happening. Lilly is ready to kill you.

The stabbing pain redoubles, causing her to cry out. Several black tentacles erupt from the boils in a spray of blood. Elina curled into a ball on the cave floor in a desperate attempt to ease the pain and loneliness as she cried herself to sleep.
rampant

12-20-06, 11:11 AM		Tirmek - She doesn't understand its different when you're not a berzerk. Elina can't afford to ... AWWW SCREW THIS I JUST WANT MY FRIEND BACK!
urial angel of death

12-20-06, 11:38 AM		Cain and Abel take shelter in a carefully concealed lean-to next Elina's.

Abel: Brother we have to help her.

Cain: No we don't. She's going to become the pawn of a child god and then we will kill her. Her fate is written in the stars.

Abel: The stars have been wrong before. We have the power to make our own descisions. What would mom think of you leaving an innocent girl to suffer.

Cain claps his hands together and a apple seed Abel had swallow during yesterday's lunch germenated ripping Abel in two.

Cain: If you still feel like helping her after coming back be my guest.

OOC: Kaizer I've been having trouble getting my private messaging to work. So just letting you know here that it's your choice if he tries to help or not.
urial angel of death

12-20-06, 12:07 PM		Lenneth, Vladamire, and Myrr drag Stewie before their father. Volrath has growth to a colossal height in his absence from the material plane. His features are hard to make out because they are constantly shifting. All over his body tentacles, eyes, mouths, cysts, and stranger things rip from his flesh only to be swallowed up again in the rolling torrent of aberrant flesh. The only part of his form the remains somewhat constant is his face. It cycles through various horrible visages. Volrath is seated on a gargantuan green soap-stone throne. Into it is carved the images of thousands of screaming spirits.
Beside him in a similar but smaller throne was Ishtar. All his children knew she was the favorite. Yet none of them, save possibly Stewie, envied her position, because they knew why. She was loved most because she looked the most like their mother.

Volrath: *in a voice that constantly changes pitch, tone, and volume* My little Stewart, why did you betray me? And even more importantly why did you betray the memory of your mother?

Stewie: I, I, I…

Volrath: You didn’t think Elina would lose.

Stewie: No I-

Volrath: Don’t lie to me Stewart. I can see inside of you, right down to your soul.

Stewie: Then why do you bother asking?!

Volrath: *seeming uninterested* Son do you know what happens to the souls Elina harvested? *before Stewie can respond* They are slowly drained. First of their memories, then their minds, and at the very end their essence. The only one released soon enough to avoid this ghastly fate was Kerrith. All the others can barely be considered sentient anymore. *picks up a small crystal orb filled with images of the FF’s crew* One last question my dear Stewart. Do you know how a soul is restored to its former self, after an experience like this?

Stewie: :weep: How?

Volrath: *the images flow from the orb into his hands* They must be reincarnated numerous times.*places his hands on Stewie’s temples* But first they must FEED ON ANOTHER SOUL! *the images flow from his hands into Stewie*

Stewie falls into convulsions and then goes limp. Soon afterward the reinvigorated souls fly from Stewie’s body in search of new homes.

Ishtar: Father, what do we do now?

Volrath: *in the voice he had while on the FF* All we can do…wait.
DungeonJman

12-20-06, 12:19 PM		Well, scratch that plan

*throws gun on the ground where the trigger gets pushed and an interdimensional vortex begins forming*

OOKaizer: What the?

I THOUGHT THAT YOU SAID THAT IT WOULDN'T WORK!
rampant

12-20-06, 03:11 PM		Tirmek - Sarah wait!

Sarah - What now gonna point out what else we did wrong!?

Tirmek - Wouldn't help at this point. Look I'm sorry ok! This kind of stuff is old hat for me, I didn't think it was that big a deal.

Sarah - And all that emotion control garbage?

Tirmek - Look ok I was rude about that, but even a berzerk needs to be able keep some part of their mind detached from the rush sometimes, emotions are not wrong or harmful, you just need to be careful!

Sarah - Look Alright! I forgive you but, I can't speak for Elina or Lily.

Tirmek - Ok Then we need to find Elina.

Sarah - Yes but what about Lily?

Tirmek - What about him?
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-20-06, 03:38 PM		Tirmek: Well, do you want to say something again?

OOcat: :zzz:

Trimek: :confused: What?

13: OOcat tends to get very sleepy after spouting off angry.

Bunny: Plus you should never take it seriously.

Tirmek: Why? Seemed quite serious to me.

13: One thing you have to understand about OOcat is that it is a being of hightened, if not pure, Chaos. It can hold two contradictory positions on the same issue as it's own, and it spouts off whatever one is contrarily applicable at the present moment of indignation or philosophy.

Tirmek: There's a word for that—

Bunny: Yeah, Neutral. :P

Tirmek: That's not—

Silver: You're taking this too seriously. :rolleyes: We're telling you that OOcat doesn't care whether anyone listens. So don't, and it'll likely take a nap and forget the whole thing.

OOC: I didn't write this. They did.
Charles Phipps

12-20-06, 04:13 PM		OOC: Wow, I'm glad we impressed you Mooncat with our brief venture into seriousness.

IC:

Aerith: Lilly...

Lilly: Never come near me again

Aerith: This...

Lilly: I need to break this cycle. I need to do something to stop the horror of something like this happening. I have to avenge Ivy.

Aerith: Lilly...

*Lilly steps off the side of the Forgotten Freedom*
urial angel of death

12-20-06, 04:31 PM		OOC: OOUrial is unable to post right now due to euphoric happiness.

OOUrial: Woot! I got a ninja pirate zombie robot familiar in KoL!
Charles Phipps

12-20-06, 04:44 PM		OOC: My all time favorite moment in the thread still remains when Kanatash and Caralot couldn't be posted because their entity was playing Skies of Arcadia.
Crystalforged

12-20-06, 05:01 PM		You know what they say about "speaking of the devil." Sorry about the long silence guys. First I had finals conspiring to suck up all my time and then Twilight Princess showed up to consume whatever is left of my soul.

OOCrystalforged: Speaking of Twilight Princess by the way, Silver, later in the game Zelda will-

OOcrystalforged is suddenly interrupted as millions of OOCats descend from the heavens carrying hammers as the flight of the valkeries plays in the background.

OOCrystalforged: :hides: I was only joking. Please don't hurt me.

HAMMERPOCOLYPSE

OOCrystalforged: Ow. Now as I give my wounds time to heal I would also like to inform OOKaizer and OORampant that Dramadar would like to have a word about this latest plot you seem to be running.

The message (http://www.rootology.com/images/exploding_head.jpg)

OOCrystalforged: Uh... Er, nevermind then. Please continue.



OOC: Also as a note I'm going to try to finish up Kitten's plotline before too long but I just had an idea which I just have to add. I'll try to have it up today or tomorrow if I can tear myself away from Twilight Princess.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-20-06, 06:44 PM		OOC: ……if I can tear myself away from Twilight Princess.
OOC: I know, addictive.

Bunny: *multiple enemy wolf bite*

OOC: To more than one of us.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-20-06, 06:55 PM		*Lilly steps off the side of the Forgotten Freedom*
Later, on the ground……

Lilly: Ow. Why am I not dead instead of writhing in tortured agony?

OOcat: Bunny's too engrossed in Twilight Princess. Fortunately we have an understudy.

Black Mage: Stabbity Death!
Kaizer_Ryu

12-20-06, 09:20 PM		OOC: Kaizer I've been having trouble getting my private messaging to work. So just letting you know here that it's your choice if he tries to help or not.
OOC: I'm gonna say no for now.

IC:

When Elina comes to, the smell of blood is everywhere. As she takes stock of her situation, she sees at least a dozen mostly intact Dragonmarked humanoids scattered about her, as well as a good deal of less distinguishable flesh and blood. She recognizes a Mark of Detection, several Marks of Sentinel, a Mark of Shadow, and a Mark of Healing among the bodies. After the initial shock, she also notices she is unaware of her location. Last she remembered, she was in the cave. Now she stood in a lightly forested area. At least, it used to be forested. Much of the area has been laid to waste.

Kitsune: It's about time you came to.

Elina: Wh-where am I? What happened?

Kitsune: You stand in what remains of an assasination team. They found you and tried to kill you early this morning.

Walking over to a lake to wash herself off, she stops to look at her reflection. The amber in her eyes was gone, leaving only pools of swirling black. Streaks of blood marked her cheeks, probably from the battle. The tentacles from before remained, and reeked of blood. Her wings were mostly bare, only a few feathers still clung to the bat-like appendages. Underneath was black, leathery skin still bearing the holes from the feathers. Her tattered clothes were caked with a mix of mud and blood.

Elina: What can I do? Where can I go?

Kitsune: You have three options open to you.

Elina: And they are?

Kitsune: Return to the FF and face your nemesis.

Elina: I won't do that. I can't. I don't care if Lilly is fated to hound me for eternity, I could never fight him in a duel to the death...

Kitsune: You can accept your fate as Chosen of the Shadow-

Elina: Never! That leads to the same result! I'm not turning against my friends or my family! I refuse to cause the deaths of millions at the whim of a monster!

Kitsune: *amused* Monster, you say? That depends on your definition. You seem to be fitting that bill quite well right now.

Elina: ...

Kitsune: The only other thing you can do is take charge of your own fate and find a way out of this. Your body is changing, but your mind has yet to fully succumb. You still have time.

Elina: :( That...would only continue the cycle in another. If it's not me, then he will find someone else...

Kitsune: Like it or not, these are your only options. If you do nothing, you will face your destiny eventually. If you fight it, you condemn another to your fate. You must choose what happens next.
rampant

12-20-06, 09:53 PM		Tirmek - Ok now we need to start a search for Elina.

Sarah - What about the elimination teams and adventureres?

Tirmek - Elina can hold out for years on that front, but its best for her if we find her quickly!

Sarah - At the same time she might keep hiding from people.

Tirmek - There aren't many who can track her down. I've had Maladren draw up some possible search grid proposals, and mark the best hiding spots she knows of.

Maladren - What am I? your secretary?
Charles Phipps

12-20-06, 10:40 PM		OOC: For clarification's sake, Lilly now pretty much can shift between Paladin Form that's his normal self and his 16 year old Deva Self. And no, he doesn't say "Shazam" to do it.

IC:

Lilly: *spits up blood on the ground* 1d6 damage per 10 feet. Didn't kill me.

Sarah: Holy Arrawai, Heal this Man's Wounds.

*clobbers him with her hammer*

Lilly: Hi Sarah.

*Sarah WHAMS HIM WITH HER HAMMER*

Sarah: Dumbass!

*hits him repeatedly with the hammer until he's completely healed*

Lilly: You don't have to do that.

Sarah: You stupid jerkface!

Lilly: I am.

Sarah: You tried to kill yourself!

Lilly: I deserve it. I didn't see you stopping me.

Sarah: Because I didn't think you'd do it!

Lilly: I don't want to become a slave to the gods.

Sarah: Huh.

Lilly: I killed my brother. IVY! My best friend! Do you understand that!? It's like if you killed Elina! I AM A MONSTER!

Tirmek: Control your...

Lilly: **** you and your emotion control Tigger! Your advice is crap! Your wisdom is utterly impractical on the material world and your accomplishments by your own hand are worthless because you never USE them to do anything important!

Tirmek: Typical behavior of a jea....

*Tirmek is clobbered for the first time by Sarah*

Tirmek:....that actually hurts.

Sarah: Tirmek, I love you but Shut the Hell up.

Lilly: I've become a monster. Ivy was the person I wanted to protect most in the world but I saved him only to be the one to take his life. Now...mom...whatever we brought back wasn't mom.

Sarah: Elina needs you Lilly.

Lilly: I renounce it.

Sarah: Huh?

Lilly: ***k the gods. *tosses away his sword* I never want to kill anyone ever again. They can keep their war and their prophecies and all of it. I never want to see another weapon as long as I live.

Rose: Lilly...

Lilly: No, don't look at me!

Rose: Hush. What has happened is unforgivable. But I don't blame you my son. I blame the people behind the Prophecy. I blame the monster that pretended to love me for eighty years.

Lilly: Can't....can't we bring him back? He died as a mons...

Rose: The gods don't judge us solely on how we die Lilly. They take the full moments of our life into account. He was possessed by a monster and no evil force could change the real Ivy.

*Rose leans down and wraps his son in his arms*

Lilly: I don't want anyone to ever feel like I feel right now.

Rose: You won't have to....because I'm going to do the killing from this point on. Mark my words, for every drop of my sons blood spilled, I'm going to make sure our enemies suffer the loss of a gallon of their own.
rampant

12-20-06, 11:02 PM		Tirmek - If its the gods and fate against us then we simply kill them.

Sarah - It can't be that easy.

Tirmek - I never said easy. *starts rolling a powerstone around in his left hand*
Kaizer_Ryu

12-20-06, 11:35 PM		Terra: I'm afraid it's not that simple.

Sarah: Mom! You shouldn't be up yet!

Terra: Oh, I'm still there. I've recovered enough to form dopplegangers again.

Sarah: :mad: You need to REST!

Terra: I know, dear. I'll make this quick. Elina is in this postition because of one person. Me. I was the one destined to bring about an age of darkness. I escaped my fate, but I failed utterly in destroying the need for that role. My failure has condemned her. Even if we somehow release her, or she accomplishes it herself, the role will still be there. It will choose another and another till it's part is played. Lilly was right. We need to break the game, not the players.

Lilly: Find someone else. I'm done with this.

Terra: That is your choice. But the role is still there. If you can avoid being drawn back into your destiny, that burden will simply fall to another.

Lilly: ...

Terra: We need information more than we need muscle. Who or what drives these events? We have merely attacked the symptoms of a larger disease so far. This will never end so long as the larger scheme is left alone.

Sarah: *crosses her arms* You said you'd make this quick.

Terra: *sigh* All right, all right. I'll stop. Mickey said he'd probably release me in the next day or two. Lisa's gonna have to be there a bit longer, though.

Sarah: Tell Momma I said hi. I'll be by later.

Terra: *nods* Till then. *disappears*
rampant

12-20-06, 11:41 PM		Tirmek - So what are the rules of the game then? Once we know the rules we can bend them.

Rose - Where is your mother in all this?

Tirmek - I live onboard when she's needs to be out of town.

Sarah - Why?

Tirmek - Lets start with "the forces of terror want me to lead them!", and skip to "the Hands of Fate are attempting to force my own!", finally there is "everyone else wants to kill me!".
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-21-06, 07:57 AM		And now, a comic interlude……

Nalfein: *blurble*

Linda: Oh, fine. Cure serious wounds.

Nalfein: Organs……rebuilding. Bones……mending. Brain……restocking fluids. Narration……ending.

Linda: Now please leave me alone.

Nalfein: WAIT!

Linda: *sigh* Make it quick.

Nalfein: (ihh Must resist urge to make lewd comment. Talk fast!) Ionlywanttotellyouthatyouareaveryintelli gentandbeautifulwomanandIwasonlytryingto impressyou—

Linda: Why?

Naflein: Well, you see because my friend and me are going to try out for the Light Warrior job and—

Linda: —you thought a Healer would make a great addition to the team?

Nalfein: :blink: Uh……yeah?

Linda: Well why didn't you just say that at the beginning? We could have avoided the whole unpleasant hammering. Not to mention your pickup lines.

Nalfein: I was obviously nervous about talking to someone of such blindingly high moral standards.

Linda: Well, I have been trying. Now let's go find this friend of yours.

Nalfein: (ihh Wow, she actually bought it. High Wisdom, HA! :P)
**********
Nalfein and Linda eventually find Stupid in the main square sitting behind a table next to a sign saying "Light Warrior job applications".

Nalfein: Hey, I found another Light Warrior.

Stupid: Great! So did I.

Nafein: (looks around) Stupid, so we have to have this discussion again about imaginary friends?

Stupid: No, really! He just went to return all the lost items people dropped while they were standing in line.

Kithle: Yes, it's amazing how often people "drop" things. And since it's nearly impossible to find the correct owners, I simply "donated" them to "charity".

Linda: Aww, that's so nice.

Nalfein: Linda, I know this guy. He actually has a plaque proclaiming him as The Magnificent Bastard.

Linda (already over near Kithle): Don't mind him. He tries to destroy anything good. I think he has some deep-seated personal issues.

Kithle: It's likely self-loathing due to being 2nd Ed in a 3.5 Ed world.

Stupid: I've been saying that ever since 3.0.

Nalfein: :tantrum: Must wait……for White Mage……to move out of……blast area………
urial angel of death

12-21-06, 08:58 AM		Damn that lawyer, thought Kanatash! Damn him! What authority did that human think he had trying to shut his park down! Kanatash paused and wondered why he felt such disgust when thinking of humans.

Reman: Why is another helicopter coming down?

Kanatash: Oh it's just my grandchildren. I thought it might be nice to give them a little vacation.

Reman: What the hell are you thinking?! This is a safety inspection!

Kanatash: I already told you everything will be fine.

Two children hop out of the landing chopper.

Kerrith and Sarah: Gandpa! *tackle hug*
Kaizer_Ryu

12-21-06, 09:45 AM		As evening gives way to night, Lilly Graymorn, Leader of the Wardens of the Wood, prepares to sleep for the night. She hears a strange rustling of leaves, followed shortly by a knock on the door.

Lilly: Who could it be at this hour?

Walking over, she opens the door and sees no one. She looks around for a moment, then moves to go back inside until a girls voice stops her.

Elina: ...Aunt Lilly?

Lilly: That voice...Elina? Where are you?

Lilly had heard about this Promise Breaker business, but she refused to believe it. She knew Elina. That sweet little girl could never do something as horrible as the Prophesy foretold. Too bad her fellows didn't feel the same.

Elina: *from the trees* I'm up here.

Lilly could barely make out the outline in the darkness, but something was odd about her.

Lilly: *walking towards her* Are you all right? Has something happened?

Elina: *retreating into the leaves* Don't...don't look at me...

Lilly: My dear, what's the matter?

Elina: I need to speak with Oalian. He may be able to help me. But I can't get in with your people guarding the grove.

Lilly: Is this about that Promise Breaker nonsense?

Elina: ...it's not nonsense. Please don't hate me...

With this, she hops down to the ground. Lilly gasps at the transformation. The bat-wings, the eyes, the patches of black on her skin, and the tentacles were all a bit shocking.

Lilly: W...w...what happened to you?!

Elina: :weep: I'm becoming a monster! I don't wanna hurt anyone. I need to talk to Oalian. I don't know where else to go. I can't go home...

Though her appearance was becoming grotesque, Lilly could still see the scared little girl underneath it all.

Lilly: All right, dear. I'll see what I can do.

After about half an hour, the pair stands before the Great Druid Oalian.

Oalian: The mantle has passed from mother to daughter. You have a very slim chance of avoiding this fate, little one. But beware, one of your greatest friends is your most hated enemy.

Elina: :( I already know that...

Oalian: Or so you think. Appearances can be deceiving.

Gharull: (Shifter Ashbound Druid 14) Indeed they can.

Lilly: Gharull?!

Gharull: You have brought the great destroyer into the heart of our realm, Lilly. For that, you must be punished.

Oalian: Stand down, Gharull.

Gharull: Hear that, men? Even our dear leader has been deceived by this abomination!

Arrows rain down upon Lilly and Elina. With a quick Wind Wall, Lilly blocks them and moves between the Ashbound leader and Elina.

Lilly: Get out of here!

Elina: But-!

Lilly: Now! Before they overwhelm us! I won't let them kill you like this! I was unable to protect your mother, so let me do at least this for you!

After a few moments, Elina reluctantly takes off, barely avoiding the attacks of the druids and their followers as they decended upon the grove...

OOC: I've got to go. :mad: I'll finish the scene up tonight.
rampant

12-21-06, 11:50 AM		Tirmek - OOOH She ripped that one from you!

Sarah - You're enjoying this on some level.

Tirmek - Several actually, I'm a little ticked she didn't use her mind blade though. I spent a month teaching her all sorts of tricks with that thing!

Lily - A little respect for dead dammit!

Tirmek - An assasination squad sent to destroy my friend, I've go a better idea. *picks up a pair of skulls and uses them as hand puppets.

Skull Right - What do you wanna do today leftie?

Leftie - Lets go track down a girl who's committed no actual crimes, and try to kill just because some drug addicted seer thinks she might be the end of the world.

Rightie - Wouldn't that just embitter her against people thus fufilling the prophecy?

Leftie - Oh come on who cares if she comes from an uber bloodline, is a trained warrior, and a really sweet kid, just get a bigger team to deal with her.
Lord Kale Fangblade

12-21-06, 12:00 PM		Sithis Flew high above the land, from each shoulder wings formed from dragonmark like Sigils had sprouted. he beat them easily, enjoying the rush of emotion at flying. Sithis pushed the feeling from his mind, he had a task. and he must complete it. Sithis cast his eyes down towards the towering trees of the reaches, He sniffed. he caught a familiar scent. Blood. and lots of it. he flew towards its direction, passing over the land faster than he would have belived. and then he caught sight of it, Olians grove. and the battle that was going on within it.

Sithis flew lower so he could take in details, but not low enough to make him a target for spells or arrows. He noted that Elina wasnt within the battle. He inhaled again, searching for Elina's scent. the blood covered it. the hunger rose in Sithis's throat. it had been sooo long since he last fed. so long since his fangs had sank into someones throat... to feel their lifeforce leave them as they... Sithis shook himself. Best to get on with the search.
DungeonJman

12-21-06, 12:12 PM		Of course, i pretty much figured this out after the first plan of mine failed: the only way to beat the prophecy is to beat the deities up. *sighs* Why is the only way out of this to make the universe fouled up beyond all recognition. Anyway, i can tell you where they reside, if you guys want, but no more than that.
rampant

12-21-06, 02:24 PM		OORampant - You're supposed to make them miserable, like this.
--------------------------------------------

Tirmek - I HATE PINE TREES!

Sarah - They're not that sharp.

Tirmek - They're dripping sap into my fur!
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-21-06, 02:47 PM		Tirmek - They're dripping sap into my fur!
Pine Tree: :incog: Target "Squvirll" has been successfully sapped, oh Fearless Leader.

13: Excellent. Proceed to the tripping of target "Moose".

Lilly: I swear these things are raising their roots up deliberately!
Crystalforged

12-21-06, 05:14 PM		Ok. I just finished Twilight Princess last night. Since I know at least some of you don't want spoilers I'll just say this, this game is epic. F***ing EPIC. I'm currently debating whether or not this game is ONLY equal to OoT.

That aside I happened to have an a little idea yesterday and it not only did it fit perfectly into Kitten's plot but the season is right too. You'll have to excuse me silver if I take just a little longer. So now I will present to you, Little Critter Dol-Dornmas.

Disclaimer: Some liberties were taken here so feel free to consider any or all of this non-canon.



IC: Panoramic view of Forgotten Freedom as holiday music plays in the background.

Narrator: Way up in the sky in a small little ship,
The Keel was being decorated all up and down and on every slip.
Redshirts slaved around vats, sometimes working 20 hours or more,
Because Dol-Dornmas needs to be brewed up before.
But out in the forest, not too far away...
*Scene shifts to a snowbound forest somewhere below the FF's flight path where a bunch of forest animals have gathered to decorate a Dol-Dornmas tree*
...The little woodland critters were also preparing for their Dol-Dornmas day.

Woodland Critters: It's almost time when the time is here,
The time that's only once a year.
We can hardly wait, 'cause it's so near.
A Woodland Critter Dol-Dornmas!

Narrator: The little critters worked hard as they happily sang
And each one of them had a quite interesting name
There was Squirrely the squirrel, Rabbity the rabbit,
Beavery the beaver, and Beary the bear
Porcupiney the porcupine, Skunky the skunk,
Foxy the fox, and Deery the deer
Woodpeckery the woodpecker, Mousey the mouse,
and Chickadee-y the chickadee, all made the forest their house.
And on that magical day, stumbling upon all of that,
was a surprised little Kitten, in a red poofball hat.

Kitten: (wearing a stocking cap with a red ball on top of it) :confused: What am I doing here? Last I remember I was being persued by gigantic cats sent by some crazy old lady who lived below decks.

*the critters approach Kitten*

Rabbity: Well hello there. Welcome to our forest.

Skunky: How do you like our Dol-Dornmas tree?

Kitten: It's... nice.

Beavery: Why, it's the most perfect tree in the forest! [the other cheer]

Mousey: Oh no, I see a problem.

Deery: What is it, Mousey?

Mousey: Our Dol-Dornmas tree doesn't have a star.

Critters: Ohhhh

Beary: We can't have a tree with no star on it.

Rabbity: What are we gonna do?

Squirrely: Now don't be down, y'all. Maybe our new friend can help us find a star.

Critters: [among other things] Can you really? Oh would you please? Could you help us?

Kitten: Ok, I like helping people.

Critters: (cheering) Yay!!

Narrator: And so, using some paper and working with glee,
the kitten in the red poofball hat made a star for the tree

Critters: Ohhhh

Beary: It's the nicest star I ever saw.

Narrator: The little critters cheered and Beavery said with a smile

Beavery: How would you like to sing and dance with us for a while?

Narrator: The kitten in the red poofball hat smiled and said

Kitten: (still looking confused) Uh, that sounds nice but I really should be getting back to the ship before it gets out of range. (trudges off through the snow)

Beavery: Goo, goodbye Kittenny!

Critters: Goodbye, Kittenny! Bye! Cya! I'll buy your hat!

Kitten: That was kind of odd.

---

*the middle of the night in a corner Kitten has claimed as her sleeping quarters. She rolls over and opens her eyes suddenly*

Critters: Hi, Kittenny!

Kitten: (still half-asleep) Oh, whatta? (squeezes his eyelids shot)

Narrator: His friends were all there! What a wonderful surprise!
The little kitten smiled with joy in her eyes

Kitten: (rubbing the sleep from her eyes) How the heck did you guys get on the ship anyways?

Squirrely: You aren't gonna believe what happened, Kittenny. It's the most magical Dol-Dornmas gift ever!

Skunky: Porcupiney is pregnant!

Kitten: Really, how did you guys get here? We're traveling at something like 50 mph around a mile off the ground.

Mousey: I deduce the cat-creature doesn't understand the seriousness of the fertilization.

Deery: Porcupiney is a virgin, Kittenny. Her conception was immaculate.

Foxy: She's gonna give birth to our Lord and Savior.

Kitten: :uh-huh: ...What?

Porcupiney: It has been foretold unto me that I would give birth on Dol-Dornmas Day.

Mousey: So soon!

Skunky: How delightful!

Woodpeckery: Our souls are saved!

Chickadee-y: Finally the critters are gonna have a Savior of their very own, of their very own! (they all cheer)

Squirrely: (hops onto Kitten's bed) There's just one problem: We don't have a manger for our Savior to be born in.

Critters: Awwww.

Beary: But we got to have a manger.

Rabbity: Can you do it, Kitten. Can you build us a manger? Huh? (Kitten nods off back into sleep which the critters see as a nod of agreement and the hoot and hollar happily)

Narrator: "Of course I'll build you a little manger!" the little kitten cried,
and he winked at her critter friends and leapt to their side!

*scene shifts back to the forest where Kitten is hammering in the last few nails of the manger*

Narrator: And out in the woods the kitten steamed right ahead,
making a place for the critter babe to lay its sweet head

Rabbity: Gee whiz, if it isn't the nicest manger I ever saw.

Mousey: I deduce it shall serve as a perfectly suitable resting place, for the Son of our Lord.

Raccoony: Does this mean we can go to sleep now?

Porcupiney: My Son will have the nicest bed in all the forest.

Woodpeckery: Fit for a king!

Squirrely: This is going to be the best critter Dol-Dornmas ever!

Woodland Critters: It's almost time when the time is here,
The time that's only once a year.
We can hardly wait, 'cause it's so near-

Kitten: (as they sing) All right, I'm going now. I really need to get back to the ship. ...And get some sleep (ambles off. A roar is heard nearby. All stop and look. The critters scream.)

Critters: The mountain lion! Hide! (they scatter, leaving Kitten to face the lion alone. The lion peers out from behind a tree)

Kitten: Um, please go away mister mountain lion. Please don't eat me. I'm sure I taste bad. (the lion moves off and the critters return)

Squirrely: Is it gone?

Mousey: I deduce it is.

Skunky: (behind a low tree) I'm not c-c-comin' out.

Foxy: Well, this is the end. The mountain lion obviously knows Porcupiney is pregnant, and he's gonna kill it again.

Kitten: Again?

Squirrely: Every Dol-Dornmas the mountain lion comes down and eats the virgin critter impregnated with the Son of our Lord.

Porcupiney: Oh dear, I'm so very afraid.

Beavery: (climbs onto a stump and sits up) Let's face it. The mountain lion will never let our Savior be born.

Critters: Awwww. (some of them sob)

Squirrely: Hey, we shouldn't be upset this Dol-Dornmas. We've got Kittenny!

Raccoony: Of course! Kittenny can do anything! If he can build a manger, he can stop that mean ol' mountain lion!

Porcupiney: Dol-Dornmas is saved! (the critters cheer)

*The camera looks up from the woods to a mountain in the distance. Dramatic music plays*

Narrator: High up in the forest on a dark, craggy peak,
the horrid mountain lion and preyed on the weak.
For the critters to be saved, someone had to stop that nasty old cat...

Kitten: *******it, this is ****ing ridiculous! I can't fight a mountain lion! I haven't had any combat training yet!

Narrator: Said the little Kitten in the red poofball hat.
(she looks at a cave entrance, then up at the peak)
Killing the mountain lion was no easy task,
but he thought of a plan, and he thought of it fast.

Kitten: (stuttering) Uh, hello? Mister mountian lion? I was wondering if maybe we could talk this all out? Maybe over tea or some- (the lion is heard roaring from inside the cave, and it roars. It approaches the entrance) Uh, maybe not then! (Flees to the cliffs edge, looks down for a moment and then turns to face the lion.) Maybe you don't like tea, something else perhaps?! (The lion leaps and Kitten dodges out of the way. The lion goes over the edge and onto its death below, at the cave entrance]

Narrator: In a flash it was over! A victorious blow!
The mountain lion lay slain on the cold ground below.

(Down at the cave entrance. Kitten sees that the mountain lion is motionless and approaches)

Kitten: Um, ok. I guess that worked (three cubs approach the entrance)

Middle Cub: Mommy? Mommy! (they rush up to her body) W... wake up, Mommy, wake up!

Pale Cub: Don't leave us, Mommy.

Kitten: :eek:

Pale Cub: Cat-creature, why? Why did you kill our mommy? Why?

Kitten: (at a loss for words) I... the... critters. Their... bir-birth of a Savior?

*the cubs snuggle close to their mom's body*

Narrator: The tiny cubs all gathered together and cried,
All alone in the world because their mother had died.

Kitten: (turns away and squeezes his eyes shut) :tantrum: Aw. Awww!

---

Back in the forest the Critters have set up campfire and are huddled around it.

Porcupiney: Oooo.

Beary: You all right, Lady Porcupiney?

Porcupiney: Oh yes, just felt a little kick is all.

Beavery : Well, it's been much too long now. Uh I'm afraid our helpful friend Kittenny must be very dead.

Foxy: Yep, the mountain lion probably swallowed her whole.

Rabbity: I guess that means our Savior is gonna be made into Savior stew.

Critters: Awwww.

Chickadee-y: (flitting straight up into the air) Wait a minute, look! (the animals turn to see Kitten approaching them)

Critters: Kittenny! (they gather in front of her)

Mousey: Kittenny, you're alive.

Beary: But, does that mean you killed the mountain lion?

Kitten: It's dead.

Deery: For real and for true?

Beavery: Are you sure.

Kitten: I'm sure. It won't be hurting you anymore.

Squirrely: She did it! Now our critter Dol-Dornmas can finally happen! Hail the Devourer!

Critters: Hail the Devourer!

Kitten: Wait, wha-what?

Beavery: You've done us a huge favor, Kittenny! Without the mountain lion around, the Lady Porcupiney can give birth to the chosen of the Devourer!

Critters: Yaaay Devourer! (they head over to the manger)

Kitten: Waiwait, the chosen of the Devourer?? You said she was giving birth to your savior!

Squirrely: Yeah, to the Son of our Lord, the Devourer, Prince of Darkness.

Kitten: But I thought you meant the Son of someone from the Host!

Deery: Well, think about it: You really think any of those goodly gods would have sex with a porcupine?

Chickadee-y: No way! Only the Devourer, Prince of Darkness and King of all Evil would do that! Yay!

Foxy: This just calls for a celebration! Let's sacrifice Rabbity and eat his flesh!

Rabbity: Yay! Sacrifice me to the Devourer!

*the other critters cheer. Beary pulls up a satanic altar on a small wagon with a little help from Squirrely. The other animals bring Rabbity up to the altar. Rabbity is propped up on the altar and Beary tears him apart with a big knife. The other animals crowd in, tear away pieces of the body, and eat them raw)

Chickadee-y: Drink his blood! Drink his blood!

Squirrely: (jumps into a puddle of blood) Blood orgy!!!

Critters: Yay, blood orgy! Blood orgy, yay!

Kitten: :twitch: :twitch: :twitch:

---

Narrator: In the gentle forest clearing on Dol-Dornmas Eve morn,
The little forest critters prepared for the Antichrist to be born.
The noble mountain lion had stopped evil in all the years past,
But now the good protector lay dead as the good owls amassed.
And meanwhile three lion cubs were crying away.
For them there would certainly be no Dol-Dornmas Day,
And soon the forest would suffer from the offspring the Devourer begat.
All of this because of the little kitten in the red poofball hat.

Kitten: (head against a desk) Ugh.

Narrator: Now that she'd killed the noble lion queen,
there was nobody to stop the Apocalypse, it seemed.

Kitten: (smacking head against desk) Uuugh!

Narrator: "I know!" she said with a new happy grin,
"I'll go back to the forest and speak with those critters again!"

Kitten: (waves the narrator away and leaves his desk) No nonono.

Narrator: She ran out the room, turned out the light,
and went back to the forest to set everything right!

*Kitten enters the ships computer lab, hops on a chair, and starts surfing the internet. The URL is for the Wizards.com forums.*

Narrator: ... and went back to the forest to set everything right!
(Kitten looks at the screen, willfully ignoring the narrator)
... She tried to forget all about it by surfing the net,
(Kitten tries to go to another site but gets the Blue Screen of Death)
but her conscience caught up with him and to the forest she did flee.
... She thought he could hide from his problems - not true!
(Kitten rolls her eyes)
She knew in her heart the thing she had to do!

Kitten: Leave me ALONE!! Don't make me get Chalky!

Narrator: She knew that only by going to the forest could she-

Kitten: All right all right all right!! Deranged Lords!! (turns off the Computer, hops off the chair and walks out the door)

---

(Back in the forest where the critters are still decorating the manger with profane symbols)

Beavery: (looks around) Hey, look everyone! It's our old pal, Kittenny. (the other critters turn and look)

Woodpeckery: Oh boy, Kittenny. You came just in time!

Deery: Yeah. We've got a big problem.

Squirrely: The Great Devourer has commanded that when the Chosen is born, we must find a human host body to transfer it into.

Chickadee-y: That way he could take over the whole world. The whole world!

Mousey: The human must dissilousined with the world and set against the Host.

Beavery: We figured you'd be perfect!

Critters: Yay!

Kitten: I'm not a human! My family is so messed up I'm pretty sure I don't even qualify as a humanoid!

Critters: Awwwww.

Beary: But we got to have a human host body for the Chosen.

Deery: Oh dear, maybe we won't have a critters D-Dol-Dornmas after all.

Squirrely: Now don't be down, y'all. Kittenny can help us find a suitable human host.

Chickadee-y: Will you really, Kittenny?

Kitten: No!! I'm not doing you anymore favors and I'm not letting you give birth to the Chosen of the Devourer! (walks off) I came here to put a stop to all this!

Beavery: To stop us?

Beary: But gee whiz, Kitten, if you try to stop us, we'd have to use our evil demonic powers on ya.

Kitten: Right, whatever. (turns around) I'm taking down the manger I built. (Beary's eyes turn red and brighten. A wall of fire appears before Kitten) Ah! (the wall gets higher) Aaaah!! (all the critters' eyes are flashing a bright red. Vultures swoop down and attack Kitten) Aagh! Aaaahh! (a two-headed demon dog appears snarling at her; she runs off) AAAAAAAH!! AAAAAAAH!! (the critters' eyes are back to normal)

Beary: Oh boy! Our demonic powers sure did the trick!

Chickadee-y: Our powers get stronger every day, get stronger every day!

Squirrely: Sorry Kittenny, but you see, nothing can stop the birth of the Chosen, except for a mountain lion.

Skunky: And you got rid o'her.

Critters: Yay!

Narrator: The kitten shook with anger! She broke a sweat and fell ill
When she remembered there were three mountain cubs still alive on the hill!

Kitten: Oh. Yeah. Ok, then.

---

Back up on the mountain. Kitten stands in front of the cave.

Kitten: Hello? Anybody in there? (the three cubs appear at the entrance of the cave)

Dark Cub: Oh no, it's the cat-creature who killed Mommy!

Medium Cub: She's come to kill us now.

Light Cub: It's okay. I died inside when Mommy was killed anyways.

Dark Cub: Yeah, better this than the slow death we'd face without a mother around.

Kitten: Look, I'm sorry I killed your mom. The, the squirrel told me she was evil.

Medium Cub: You got tricked by a squirrel? Gee, you're not too smart, are you, lady?

Kitten: I'm trying to make this all right again, but the only thing that can stop Deveourer-worshiping critters is a mountain lion!

Dark Cub: Yeah, and you killed her.

Kitten: Well, you're mountain lions.

Light Cub: Us? No, we're just kids. We still have our baby teeth.

Medium Cub: And our baby claws.

Dark Cub: And a dead mom.

Kitten: There still has to be a way for you to kill the porcupine's baby.

Dark Cub: What? You mean like in an abortion?

Light Cub: Yeah. An abortion. That can work.

Medium Cub: But, we don't know how to give abortions.

Dark Cub: Do you know some place we can learn, lady?

Narrator: "Where can they learn that?" the kitten said with a frown.
"I know! The ships doctor Mickey did them for a crown."

Kitten: :eek: What?!

Narrator: So she picked up the cubs and to the ship she stormed.
And took them to where abortions are performed.

Kitten: No, she didn't.

Narrator: Yes she did.

Kitten: No, she didn't!

Narrator: Yes she did.

Kitten: No, she didn't!!

Narrator: Yes she (scene shift to Kitten holding the cubs in Mickey's office as he bends over to examine Dooj) did!

Kitten: Aw Jaeladamnit! (Dooj is startled, Mickey is too drunk to be surprised)

Narrator: Said the kitten in the red poofball hat! "We've made it already, little cubs! Fancy that!"

Mickey: (walks over) Excuse me, what are you doing here?!

Narrator: The abortion doctor inquired.

Mickey: (slurring slightly) Whater you doing here?

Kitten: I don't know, I, I'm supposed to show these mountain lions how an abortion is performed or something, I... I know, it's ridiculous.

Mickey: (still slurring) Well, you're in luck, I'm happy to inform!
It's only three days until Dol-Dornmas, so I have LOTS of abortions to perform!
Gather around my table, cute little lions,
I'll teach you to do abortions without even tryin'!

Narrator: And so the little boy and the cubs gathered around the chair base,
And all day watched abortion after abortion take place.

Kitten: (to narrator) I'm just going to say this once. When this is all over, Chalky is going to own your ***.

---

Back in the forest. The critters are singing a Dol-Dornmas tune.

Beary: Oh look. That little feller is all alone.

Skunky: Gee, he looks sad. (next shot is Lilly kneeling next to a log, looking sad)

Critters: Hi there!

Lilly: (gets up and turns around) What the hell?

Beavery: How come you're all alone on Dol-Dornmas Eve.

Lilly: I'm... not celebrating Dol-Dornmas

Raccoony: Aww, but why?

Lilly: Well, because, I've... Kinda turned against the Host after some recent events.

Critters: (cheering) Yay!

Beary: But does that mean you're dissillusioned with the world?

Lilly: Yeah, I suppose pretty much.

Critters: (exulting) Yay! Yay! (they gather around Lilly)

Beavery: You've got to come with us!

Deery: You're perfect! Just pu-perfect!

Lilly: Huh?

Critters: (taking him away) Yay! Woohoo! Woohoohoo!

---

Narrator: Twas the night before Dol-Dornmas, and above the woods, way up high,
a new bright shiny star hung in the sky.
(bright RED star. Kitten walks into view)
For the world to be saved there was only one shot.
A little kitten with three cubs, and an abortion plot.

Kitten: Okay, come on, the critters are over this way. You mountain lions ready to stop the Chosen of the Devourer from being born?

Dark Cub: Sure. We know how to give abortions now.

Narrator: She arrived at the critter forest ready to fight,
but then gasped when she saw a most dreadful sight.

(the critters are in and around the manger looking at the new baby, the Chosen of the Devourer)

Beavery: Guys, we did it!

Squirrely: The Chosen is born, bringin' a thousand years of darkness to the forest. [the Chosen growls and throws little fits]

Narrator: The Chosen had been born, sealing the world's fate.
The kitten in the red poofball hat... was too late.

Kitten: Too late? The hell is that??

Beavery: Oh. Hiya, Kittenny!

Lilly: (now tied to the altar, frightened) Hey! Hey you, I've seen you on the ship before, what in Dorruth is going on?!

Kitten: It's Critter Dol-Dornmas! It's freaking messed up!

Skunky: Now all we have to do is put the Chosen into our human host.

Critters: Let's go! All right! Woohoo!

Kitten: (turns to the lion cubs) That's it?! Ten thousand years of darkness and I don't even have a Merry Dol-Dornmas?! (Skunky, Squirrely, Beary, and Chickadee-y walk over to get Lilly. A big red sleigh appears in the sky)

Narrator: When up in the sky the sound of sleigh bells were heard
And a jolly red sleigh flew down to the earth like a bird!

Beavery: Wwow, look, there's Aerith Claus!

Critters: (cheering) Yay!

Skunky: Let's eat her flesh! (the sleigh lands and rolls to a stop)

Aerith: (hops out) All right, what the hell is going on?! Why is there a red star glowing in the sky?!

Raccoony: We finally did it, Aerith! We brought forth the Chosen of the Devourer with help from our good friend, Kittenny.

Skunky: Death and pain await all living things.

Aerith: Little girl, you should be ashamed!

Kitten: I mean, I didn't mean to help them, I I tried to stop them!

Aerith: Well good going, stupid! There's only one way to stop demon-worshiping critters! (reaches back and whips out a long shotgun. She fires, and the top half of Beavery's head is gone.)

Critters: Aaaaah! (they scatter. Aerith fires again, and Deery goes down. Two more shots and the tops of Raccoony's and Skunky's heads come off)

Kitten: :uh-huh: Ok, what the? This is just getting more bizzare by the minute (Squirrely activates his demon power with the red glow from his eyes and a wall of fire appears before Aerith.)

Singers: Hold steady, Aerith

*Aerith simply hops through it, gets into position, and fires at Squirrely, blowing him to smithereens.*

Kitten: (goes to untie Lilly from the altar) Come on, this is messed up. (Aerith continues firing at the remaining critters. Porcupiney is blown apart, then Foxy.)

Beary: Gee whiz, Aerithy, you're not gonna kill me, are you- (his head is blown off and he goes down)

Dark Cub: But Aerith, what do we do about the Chosen? (Kitten and Lilly join Aerith and the cubs]

Aerith: Don't worry, kids. The Chosen cannot survive without a human host body to go into.

Lilly: (looks down) No. (walks towards the manger) No, I want to have the Chosen of the Devourer inside me!

Kitten: What? Lilly??

Lilly: (now in the manger, behind the trough) With his power, remake the world so this kind of **** doesn't happen any more!

Aerith: Don't do it, Lilly! (grinning evilly, Lilly holds the little Chosen in his left hand. A glow emanates from the Chosen and its spirit floats out of its body and into Lilly's chest. Kitten growls from the effects and stretches his arms out)


Kitten: Alright, WTF!!

Lilly: (returns to the altar, climbs up, and exults) Yes, yes!! Now I will take control of Dol-Dornmas once and for all! HAHA! HAAA!! Now I shall rule the- (feels something...) Aww. Uuugh. God it burns! AAAH! My soul is on fire! Whoa. Oh, I don't like this! (hops off the altar) I didn't know it would feel so... dark and evil!

Kitten: Well what did you expect, stupid? It's the son of the Devourer.

Lilly: Oh God, what have I done?? (sits down) I'm sorry. Please, I don't wanna be the vessel for the Chosen of the Devourer.

Aerith: (with his shotgun at the ready) I'm sorry, but it's too late, Lilly! Aerith's gonna have to kill you! (pumps the shotgun)

Kitten: No Aerith, don't!

Aerith: We don't have a choice. In a few hours, the dark creature inside him will consume his soul.

Narrator: The little kitten fretted. She almost started to bawl
But that's when she came up with the best idea of all.
(Kitten grins)

Kitten: The lion cubs!

Narrator: The little kitten quickly begun,

Kitten: I took them to see how abortions are done.

Aerith: What??

Kitten: Now cubs, do like they showed you. Hurry up fast!
Get the Chosen of the Devourer out of my friend Lilly's ass!
(the cubs trot over to Lilly, who's on a makeshift delivery bed)

Narrator: And in the twinkling starlight, each little cub did their portion.
They remember all they had learned and gave Lilly an abortion.

(The dark cub is deep in Lilly's ass, retrieving the Chosen with his teeth. He succeeds and takes it to Aerith quickly. Aerith takes it and sets it down on a stump, grabs a large mallet next to the stump, raises it over his head, and bring it down upon the Chosen, smashing it to bits with a loud THUD]

Lilly: Thanks, everybody. I I'm sorry I got a little crazy there.

Aerith: Well little girl, it seems that YOU (points to Kitten) have really been through a lot. Is there any special present you would like this year?

Kitten: (smiles) Yeah. Yeah, there is.

*The lions' cave. Aerith arrives at the corpse of the mountain lioness and moves his hand over it (casting true ressurection), releasing some dimond dust and watching it settle. The lioness stirs*

Mother Lion: Weh, ah my, what happened?

Cubs: (the three of them run up to greet her) Mommy? Yay! You're back! We missed you, Mommy!

Kitten: (relieved) Oh, good.

Narrator: And back home, there were presents, and lots of food to get fat.
And it was the best Dol-Dornmas ever for the kitten in the red poofball hat.

*A shot of the FF, receding from view*

Narrator: And they all lived happily ever after.



Except for Lilly, who died of AIDS two weeks later.

Lilly: HEY!

The End



OOC: In case you didn't figure it out this is a direct rip off of a South Park episode with a little editing and replacement of characters.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-21-06, 05:56 PM		OOC: Not only are you officially the most messed-up person here, but I think we're all the worse for reading that. You may take this as critizism or a complement, whichever you like.
rampant

12-21-06, 07:53 PM		OORampant - I knew one of you was going to make a stab at my Craziest E.B.N.E. Award, I'm just waiting until Phipps tells me to hand it over.
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Can't move sap drying!
Charles Phipps

12-21-06, 07:54 PM		OOC: I consider that utterly canon in every way.

Aerith: I also used Heal on Lilly after ressurecting him as his Dol Dornmas present. Don't ask how he got aids.

Lilly: Damn changeling WH*RES.

Best post ever and hand over the award Rampant.

IC:

Now for a Holiday Special on the forgotten Freedom...

Flashback to Last Dol Dornmas

Captain Jarlot: Why the **** do I have to be the Grand Druid for Dol Dornmas?

*The Grand Druid's attire consisting of a white beard, red hat with puffball, and a fat suit with a Bag of Holding carrying weapons*

* Peter, Susan, Lucy, and Edmund look at the odd visitor*

Susan: Ummmmm Father Christmas, why are you giving us weapons as opposed to toys?

Lucy: You also curse like Daddy when he's drunk. Smell like him too.

Captain Jarlot: Listen you ****ing brats. The big ass Lion told you to kill the White Queen and that's what you're going to do.

Susan: But we're kids.

Captain Jarlot: THIS IS WAR BLONDIE! Child soldiers are a necesscity! Remember don't let them take you alive!

Lucy: *cries*

Present Day

*The Ship is outlayed in gold and silver tinsel to represent the gold and silver that adventurers take from the dead*

*The Dol Dornmas Bush is being doused with Gasoline in preparation for burning it*

*All the presents are wrapped underneath it with most of them being obviously magical items of a destructive bent, potions of healing, or little treasure chests that the naughty little alignment violators may find have traps in them*

Zella: This holiday is incredibly offensive.

Rose: How the hell can you not like Dol Dornmas? They actually make alcohol out of eggs for it!

Zella: Do you know what the Grand Druid did to my people? He kidnapped thousands of them during the Great War with the Dragons and kept them slaving over a hot forge making those weapons your people's children take for granted.

Admiral Jarlot: *Already plastered* Well that's what elves are good for. The only time they ever did a honest day's work in their life. Lousy hippies.

Lilly: Dad, aren't we Arrawists?

Rose: Yes son, we celebrate the 8 days of Arrahnukah by setting alit a candle each day and spinning a couple of wooden tops. We also get a beanie.

Lilly: ....I'm failing to see the appeal.

Rose: Yes, well, it's events like this that combined with persecution of half-elves resulted in us taking over Valenar as our new Holy Land.

Admiral Jarlot: Damn Arrawists! You people killed Tira Mirron!

Rose: Tirra Mirron died at the hands of the Demons.

Admiral Jarlot: That's not what the Passion of the Mirron says! It was all because of you damn half-elves!

Rose: Aren't you a Dol Dorn worshipper?

Lisa: Well yes, some radical sects of the Silver Flame suggest that Mirronmas is actually just a converted Dol Dornmas. Which would explain why its held on the Winter Solstice and it involves tossing an orc on the fire.

Admiral Jarlot: Yeah, except they don't host the big orgy at the end.

Lisa: Why the crew voted for Dol Dornmas instead.

Andrea: In any case, I've animated Doog's bloated and shark infested corpse to do the waiter work.

Michael: I'd be unhappy about my friend dying but he's much more interesting this way.

Andrea: Sadly, we can't ressurect him because Lilly destroyed his soul.

Lilly: *shaking presents* Hey, ANYONE could have made that mistake.

Ivy: I'm back for a cameo and family cheer *shakes present*

Elina: Do you smell burning unicorn?

Lilly: I offered to help with the Dol Dornmas feast....

Tirmek: If you'll excuse me *wearing a turban and robes* I have to go to my room and pray. We fast during Rakashasadam.

Lilly: Whew, finally a religion with Suckier Holidays.

Tirmek: I'm now going to maul you.

*Tirmek pounces on Lilly and screams are heard*

Miko: Rose, is there really a Grand Druid?

Rose: Yes, Miko, there is a Grand Druid. He's passed out naked in the buffet now after drinking some of the "special" Nog.
rampant

12-21-06, 08:13 PM		OORampant - Dammit, oh well it was good while it lasted.

OOCrystalforged - Happy :dancin:

OORampant - :twitch: Here's your damn trophy!

*CLANG*

OOCrystalforged is laying in heap with a dented trophy and a large bump rising out of his head ala tom and jerry.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-21-06, 08:34 PM		OOC: Sorry rampant. Crystalforged has your "craziest E.B.N.E." award permanently now.

That was messed up beyond belief.

The Dol Dornmas preparations were hilarious. :D

And now, the continuation of my last post.

IC:

Lilly Graymorn sat tied up under heavy guard, awaiting the judgement of the clan leaders. It had never been her intention to win. She knew that was impossible. But she had succeeded in buying Elina time enough to escape. She could hear Gharull spouting off about something or other from time to time, but not much else.

After a particularly heavy bout of shouting and what sounded like a brawl, the Children of Winter stormed out. Not long after, Feralyn (Head of the Eldeen Rangers) approached her with a message.

Feralyn: *kneeling next to her* I've managed to convince Gharull and the rest of the Ashbound that seeking your execution would not serve any purpose.

Lilly: Is there talk of civil war?

Feralyn: Not yet, but it is a definite possibility. He's been blackening your name and undermining Oalian. He called you both pawns of the Promise Breaker. Most of the clans now believe he is under some form of Geas. His words will not be trusted till such time comes that they break this imaginary control. You, on the other hand, have been stripped of your position and are to be placed under house arrest until they can determine if you are merely being controlled or actively supporting our destroyer.

Lilly: Please tell me you don't believe Elina's evil.

Feralyn: If nothing else, I don't believe she will do anything by choice.

Lilly: They've only made the situation worse. She wanted help, and they gave her war!

Feralyn: Lilly...the Children of Winter have decided to aid Elina in her destiny.

Lilly: WHAT?!

Feralyn: They feel that her destiny and their goals are one and the same. Already, Gharull is speaking of wiping them out before they can do any harm.

Lilly: This is insane! *shakes her head* What about the Wardens?

Feralyn: As you know, without you, there is no single leader. The squabbling is still going on, but it looks like there may be a split. This will get very ugly if nothing is done.

Lilly: Gods preserve us...

Feralyn: It gets worse. Elina flew off towards Fairhaven, and some reports indicate she stayed nearby for a while. Gharull is trying to drum up support for a full scale assault on Aundair.

Lilly: MADNESS!!! COMPLETE AND UTTER MADNESS!!! He will get us all killed!

Feralyn: I know, I know. I'm doing what I can. I'm facing a revolt among my own troops. The prospect of taking on the hated oppressors is too tempting for many of them.

Lilly: ...what will become of us?

-----

Elina was out of ideas. Lilly Greymorn was the only person she knew who would have listened to her, and Elina's very presence had probably condemned her to death. In the mean time, her body had continued to warp. The grotesque combination of Lycanthropic and Demonic features left her horrid in appearance. Her tail had grown longer, the hair on the end had been replaced with barbs. Black and red scales could be seen through the fur that had sprouted across her body. She now had a short snout filled with rows of fangs, and her hands bore serrated claws. She curled up atop a cliff in northern Q'Barra under the light of the moons.

Elina: ...

Kitsune: ... (OOC: Yes, even her silence is magenta :P )

Elina: That's it, I guess. Even the monster nations have a bounty out on my life.

Kitsune: ...

Elina: *sarcastically* What? No words of encouragement? No sage advice?

Kitsune: ...I have one more option for you. Though I don't believe you'll like it.

Elina: If you want me to just get it over with and face Lilly, save your breath.

Kitsune: You know I don't breathe.

Elina: Figure of speech! :mad: I am not in the mood for this!

Kitsune: Fine, I'm sorry. But that's not what I was going to suggest.

Elina: :confused: ...then what?

Kitsune: Do you trust me?

Elina: Huh?

Kitsune: I'm serious. Do you trust me?

Elina: Of course I do! You're my best friend! ...you're my only friend right now...

Kitsune: Is that the only reason?

Elina: No... You've been with me for as long as I can remember. I owe you so much. You've looked out for me, cheered me up, and told me when I was doing something stupid. You were usually right, too.

Kitsune: Usually?

Elina: Ok, always.

Kitsune: Would you trust me with your life?

Elina: In a heartbeat...

Kitsune: Then come with me.

The change startled Elina, but the request was even more odd. Come where?

Elina: Kitsune...what do you mean "come with me"?

Shadow: Just what you think it does.

OOC: Ok, I'm gonna stop on that little cliff hanger. Seriously, no touchy at this time. I'll do the rest after dinner. Soooooo hungryyyyy........
Charles Phipps

12-21-06, 08:49 PM		OOC: My only insistance is Miss Graymorn and Lilly Galan meet so she can point out it's a girl's name while Lilly insists its gender neutral and kinda masculine.

Also the horrible revelation Lilly is named for her by Rose.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-21-06, 09:24 PM		OOCrystalforged: Hand it over.

OOKaizer: *clutching a trophy* Never! It's mine!

OOCrystalforged: Go back and read the post. OOCharles said it was the best post ever. You have to give me that.

OOKaizer: My wedding post was mostly serious! Your post was just insane! There's got to be a different trophy for that.

*a new trophy materializes in OOCrystalforged's hands*

Both: :D Everyone wins! :D
rampant

12-21-06, 09:33 PM		Tirmek - Somone's coming! *shifts into dark-haired half elf girl*

Lily - Why?

Tirmek - I panicked ok!

Sarah - Hello
---------------------------------------

Two minutes later

Tirmek - Ok Thats it! I've had it up to here (gestures about a foot above her head) ! You have two minutes to spill before i traipse into your mind and rip it out of you.

Ranger - You're trying to intimidate me.

Tirmek - If I was trying to intimidate you, you would be having a heart attack.

Ranger - And who are you to make such claims child. I noticed you let the blue haired girl do the fighting.

Tirmek - I AM THE NEPHEW OF SATNAK THE DEICIDE.

Ranger - Greyholmeoftheashboundhelpedherescape!th ey'reholdingherinthenextclearingonthelef t.

Tirmek - Thank you I'd hate to waste power points on a 1st level ranger with badger companion and a butter knife.

Ranger - Wait a minute...nephew?

Tirmek - Goodnight! *punch*
-------------------------------------------

OORampant - Does that mean there's another trophy for bastardry?
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-21-06, 10:11 PM		OOC: Ok, I'm gonna stop on that little cliff hanger. Seriously, no touchy at this time. I'll do the rest after dinner. Soooooo hungryyyyy........
Caralot: *squeeze* But I can't help it. She's soooooooooooooo cute! :D

Elina: GAH! Can't breath………

Caralot: Awwww, how could anyone hate you? Well I'm not going to let them! :P

Shadow: Hello? Dramatic evil temptation moment here?

Caralot: Bah! Silver!

Silver: Got it. :devil:

Shadow: WAIT! I'm the thing making her look this way! If you scare me away then she'll go back to looking like she did before.

Caralot: :rolleyes: Like being pursued by the Fury could stop you.

Fury: :drool: Emo.

Shadow: AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

As the Shadow runs away, Elina manages to extract herself from Caralot's Hug of Fan-Craze.

Elina: So what in the name of evil are you doing here?

Caralot: Well, since Crystalforged is suffering serious delays, I haven't had anything to do. So I thought I'd pop up-deck and see how two of my favorite impossible mixes are doing, and I find out you're being pursued because you've been labeled a monster. I just wanted to check up on you and—EEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! KAWAII!

Elina: *choke* That's not how the word's used. *choke*

Caralot: *sigh* (releases grip, and Elina falls down with a comic "whoosh") But I suppose I'm not allowed to do anything, so I'd better head back and wrap my presents for Dol-Dornmas.

Elina: So Devotees of Thyrs celebrate that?

Caralot: Drinking, eating, and getting free stuff? Who wouldn't want that? Well, buh-bye! :D
*********
Later, in front of the Dol-Dornmas bush……

Rose: Um, Caralot?

Caralot: Yes?

Rose: Why are your presents writhing?

Caralot: Nuh-uh. Not until Dol-Dornmas day.
Charles Phipps

12-21-06, 10:36 PM		OOC: I love this holiday so much it's gotten to the point I actually said 'Merry Dol Dorn mass' in real life.

We need to get Keith Baker to make it a Holiday in Eberron.
urial angel of death

12-21-06, 10:43 PM		Volrath sits in his room with his two brothers.

Volrath: Even if I wanted to I doubt we could. If Kanatash sided with us, and that's a big if, we'd still have Terrek, Satnak, and Terra to deal with.

Cain: We have too.

Volrath: No prophecy could ever force me to harm Terra or her children.

Cain: You wouldn't have to.

Volrath: I'm the strongest of the avatars and I'm only barely on par with her. How do you guys expect to win.

Abel: Second most powerful.

Volrath: What? :eek:

Cain: Our sweet little sister the avatar of purity has surpassed you in power.

Volrath: How she's still at the clinic!?

Abel: Well sister always was very sensitive to the otherworldly and an old family member tried to use that to his advantage.

Volrath: Hastur. :nonono:

Cain: Yes our good old uncle tried to kidnap her through the dreamlands and use her as a hostage to get father to release him.

Volrath: That bastard!

Abel: Yes well his plan backfired. When she was brought into the dreamland not only were the children god's planar chackles on her released, so were all the seals they had placed on her power.

Volrath: Of grandfather! So she?

Cain: It's easier just to show you. Come mystic bloom.

The shipss wooden planks warped as an enormous red flower sprouted from them. The center of the flower was filled with perfectly still and clear water. Hundreds of images flowed through it at incredible speed. They started to slow down and finally focused on one particular sceen.

It showed Volrath's older sister Clarice. Using nothing but an ordinary looking scimitar she was cutting a path of death and destruction through her uncle's yellow city. From her mere presence chosen of Hastur reverted to the humans they had once been and qouri returned to the mists from which they were made. The creatures that could survive her aura were far less lucky. All eight of Hastur's octupi avatars lay dead on his palace steps. What little remained of their entrails decorated the streets below. She now stood before the King in Yellow himself. But Hatur was not the imposing figure Volrath had known and feared most of his life. Now the Yellow King was little more than a sickly old man in tattered robes, he looked absolutely pathetic kneeling before Clarice an empty shell of his former self.

Hastur: Stop this travesty at once my niece!

Clarice: Never *stabs Hastur sevetral times in less vital places and then presses her blade against her uncle's throat* And I think it's about time you started calling me aunty.
Crystalforged

12-21-06, 11:33 PM		OOC: Not only are you officially the most messed-up person here, but I think we're all the worse for reading that. You may take this as critizism or a complement, whichever you like.
:bored: You've known for this long and you don't already know how I'll take that? :P

OORampant - Dammit, oh well it was good while it lasted.

OOCrystalforged - Happy

OORampant - Here's your damn trophy!

*CLANG*

OOCrystalforged is laying in heap with a dented trophy and a large bump rising out of his head ala tom and jerry.
:D Ah, now all is right again in the world. You really shouldn't get so possessive, after all you're still the owner/operator of the Magnificent Bastard plaque. Which might explain a bit the manner in which you choose to hand the award over... :P



P.S. I have to work tomorrow but I should finish up Kitten's plot tomorrow night. What? Why are you looking at me like that?
Kaizer_Ryu

12-22-06, 12:00 AM		Elina: YOU!

Shadow: Surprised?

Elina: How...? Why...? When...? :hoppingma WHAT DID YOU DO WITH KITSUNE?!?!

Shadow: I see you don't understand. Or maybe you don't want to. There never was a fox spirit named Kitsune. It was me. It has always been me.

Elina: :weep: That...that's not true! :weep:

Shadow: I once told you I would always be watching. And I always have. You are not just a pawn. You are quite special to me.

Elina: :weep: You BASTARD! You tricked me! I trusted Kitsune with everything! I thought you were my friend! :weep:

Shadow: Did Kitsune ever give you reason not to trust her?

Elina: :weep: You manipulated me! She was my only friend! :weep:

Shadow: 'She' was me. Yes, I pushed you. But it was for your own good. You had to be prepared for the hardships you would face.

Elina: HARDSHIPS YOU HAVE CAUSED!

Shadow: Oh really? Because I don't remember trying to hunt you to the ends of the earth. I don't remember sending my champion to kill you. I don't remember killing your friend and protector in cold blood.

Elina: I know all the horrible stuff you did to Mom! You're an evil, cruel and heartless monster!

Shadow: A common misconception of me and my brethren. We merely represent the darker aspects of life. Without decay, there can be no progress. Without strife and rivalry, no one is motivated to improve. Existance becomes stagnant and pointless. We are blamed for all the bad, but we play as much a part in keeping this world moving as the Host.

Elina: That does not forgive what you did to Mom!

Shadow: I did nothing. My failure of a son and his lackeys forced far too much on her. Those fools who lay out and follow the Prophesy did the rest. When I came to release her from those burdens, she rejected me and chose to throw away my blessings.

Elina: Blessings?! How much death, how much suffering till you are satisfied?! I will never do it!

Shadow: You see only the short term, my dear. You have seen the hate, the prejudice, the cruelty this world is strewn with. You can give them a fresh start. A world where the divisions of the past are forgotten.

Elina: At what cost?! You would have me murder the guilty and the innocent alike!

Shadow: Again, you see only the short term. You will have to accept that certain things must be done now in order to preserve the later.

Elina: BULL****!

Shadow: Take your place as my Chosen, and you will be able to remake the world. Your actions will make way for an era of unparalleled peace and prosperity. Take on this mantle, and you will be able to spare your friends and your family. You would no longer be hunted and forced to live in fear. And...

Elina feels her body shift again. Looking at her hands, she sees they have returned to normal. Feeling her face, there is no snout, no fur, and no scales. The pain is gone. She is as she was before that terrible night.

Shadow: I can free you from this curse inflicted upon you by your nemesis.

The image of the Shadow in her mind begins to fade and her body resumes it's grotesque appearance.

Shadow: Consider my words. When you decide, call to me. If you join me, I will guide you in fulfilling your destiny. If you refuse, I will leave and never bother you again.

This time, Elina is left truly alone. The comforting presence of her beloved spirit guide is gone when she needed her most. Refuse and probably be cursed and hated forever, as well as condemn another to her fate. Join and bring so much suffereing to the world, but supposedly benefit the long term. It was too big to decide at once. Confused and upset, Elina once again headed off into the night...
Charles Phipps

12-22-06, 12:59 AM		Michael: Tis the season to beat ass, Fa La La La la la la. On we now, I go kill orcs. Tra La La la La La la.

*moaning fills the air*

Doog: Ohhhh Michael, it is I, the ghost of your old partner Doog Marley!

Michael: Oh wow! I love your stuff! Especially "I Shot the Sheriff."

Doog: DOOG Marley not Bob! We were only friends for like fifteen years!

Michael: I vaguely recall you. Wait, you're my dark skinned porter!

Doog: You're freaking WHAT!?

Michael: Well here's how *I* remember our friendship.

***

Darkest Xendrick

*Michael stands in khaki shorts, a khaki shirt, a pith helmet, and an attractive girl in similiar attire save with exposed midriff whom suspiciously resembles Lisa*

Michael: Good show my brethren! At last we've pierced the heart of the Jungle!

Lisa: Oh you glorious Great Brelish Hunter you! This jungle makes me want to take my clothes off immediately and ravish you.

Michael: Not here my love. The dark skinned savage behind us says otherwise.

*Points to Doog wearing Caveman gear*

Doog: Doog get gold for leading man into the haunted woods. Ugh

***

Doog: YOU RACIST ***HOLE!

Michael: I can't help it if half-fiends are inherently superior!

Doog: Oh that's it, I don't care about the three ghosts going to visit you this Dol Dornmass.

Michael: Dol what now?

Doog: You know it as Devourermass.

Michael: Oh right, the day we try and impregnate the porcupine.

*Doog's ghost flees quickly*

Michael: Oh well, time to go back to my cabin and enjoy myself with a beautiful woman.....that I have to imagine.

*Michael steps into his room to see a Lisa with a flowing wreath upon her head*

Michael: Oh hell yes, I knew that lesbianism was just a phase.

*Lisa hits him with her Christmas hammer*

Lisa: I am the Ghost of Tirronmas past.

Micahel: Damnit, how many Holidays are freaking celebrated on this day!

Lisa: You have lost your true calling and I am here to guide you back to becoming a true champion!

Michael: You're here to persuade me to become a Blackguard again?

*Lisa blinks, checks her notes*

Lisa: I *KNEW* there was something funny about the way they phrased this.

Michael: I'll tell you what. We get nekkid. Not naked but NNEEEKKIIDDDDDD right now on my bed and I'll be quite corrupt about it.

Lisa: and here I wondered what I saw in you.

Michael: Something a foot long.

Lisa: ANYYYywayyyyyyyyy, I'm here to show you your past.

Michael: Including the parts where you emasculate me and pretty much dump me after pledging my love to you?

Lisa: Terra was VERY accomadating you pervert.

Michael: She bit me in wolf form once....in a very sensetive place.

Lisa: ....given what you like, that's the least she should have done.

Michael: Oh fine, just take me with your magical powers to the past.

*Lisa pulls out a slideshow*

Michael: Oh come on!

Lisa: You get the bargain basement visitation.

Michael: Damnit. At least there's bound to be blood and nudity.

Lisa: I censored that out.

Michael: Damnit!

*turns on slide show*

Lisa: Here's you as a baby with building blocks.

Micahel: Hehe, I learned my first cuss words that way. There's my plush Cthulhu!

Lisa: Here's you at Hogwarts when you were studying to be a magician.

Michael: I'm flushing Ron Weasely's head down the commode and just smashed Harry's glasses. Around finals Hermione got knocked up. I'm not sure if it was mine.

Lisa: UGH! What did I ever see in you?

Michael: You were a lot more fun when you were an **** retentive biatch I admit.

Lisa: *sigh* Okay, here's a photo of you at the Knights Academy. You're making lewd comments to the female paladins!

Michael: Hey! That's you!

Lisa: Oh my Flame! You were the guy who kept suggesting Knight on Knight action was the ultimate pursuit of any holy knight?

Michael: We were destined to be together! You like bigamy! Come on!

*Lisa disappears*

Michael: Now to get some sleep after some fun....

*Michael climbs in bed as he pulls out his porn collection*

*It was then the room lit up with the appearance of a giant Jarlot in great robes and a vast feast about him*

Michael: DAMNIT! NOT WHAT I WAS HOPING FOR!

Jarlot: Sweet Dol Dorn Michael, why can't you save enough money for a ***** like normal people.

Michael: Marish is too expensive! I have to waste on booze, cigarettes, and porn too ya know!

Jarlot: You're almost as bad as Ketler and he's never seen a naked woman.

Michael: Ummm...geeks have the internet. Very few can make that claim now.

Jarlot: Touche, I'm here to teach you the meaning of Dol Dornmas.

Michael: I worship the Devourer!

Jarlot: The Difference between the Devourer and Dol Dorn is Dol Dorn on a p*ssy day....wait, PET FANCY is in your porn collection?

Michael: Terra left me with some very odd tastes.

Jarlot: Oiye. Okay, basically you're not having fun sitting here all alone in your room tonight.

Michael: I will be if you give me a few minutes.

Jarlot: * takes Michael though the wall as they become ethereal*

Michael: OH MY GOD! THIS IS WHAT THE REAL INGREDIANT OF THE CHILI IS!?

Jarlot: Are you that surprised? I mean how else should we dispose of them?

Michael: No wonder my Chili always has red napkins and the occasional button.

Norbaz: Man, that Michael sure is a loser.

Michael: I'm right here!

Jarlot: They cannot see or hear you.

*Norbaz's young adopted son Tiny Tim walks in on his clutches*

Michael: Good.

*hoists Tim over his shoulders and tosses him into the chili where he's boiled alive*

Norbaz: La la la la la. *cannot hear screams because he's got his IPOD set to the Food Network and Rachel Ray*

Jarlot:.....wow, that was cruel.

Michael: It would be more cruel if he was actually a child and not a thirty year old convicted rapist with a gland problem.

Jarlot: Next stop, the Girl's showers?

Michael: Oh yes.

*much later*

Michael: I feel much better about myself having murdered, cheating, and tortured all the crew members whom didn't like me.

Jarlot: Alas, you have one ghost yet you must face.

Michael: Who?

*Kitten walks in*

Michael: SCREEAAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!

Kitten: how rude.

Michael: It's......I think I've gone insane.

Jarlot: Yes, you face now the true form of one of the Great Old Ones.

Kitten: Ummm...is this the right room?

Aerith: *huffs and puffs* Sorry, I was getting into costume. OH MY! HOW CUTE!

Kitten: What the....

*snuggles up Kitten*

Aerith: I shall love you forever!

Kitten: Oh no, it's the crazy Lady from the woods with the shotgun!

*Aerith walks off carrying the struggling Kitten*

Michael: I guess I miss beng shown how many women don't take up my offers of sex.

Jarlot: Your come on lines are pretty bad.

Michael: Hey, Hell must be missing a succubus is a classic!

Jarlot: Very well, I shall show you a sex tape of how perverted Terra has gotten with Lisa to inspire you to once more seek to be the most vile blackguard in the universe.

*Michael puts it in the DVD player*

*watches for five minutes*

Michael: Oh hell, that's too filthy for even me. I have to go kill something!

*grins broadly*
*grabs his unholy avenger and walks out*

*stabs Bob Cratchett collecting for Thranish charities on the way out*

Bob: I...only wanted to help children!

*Norbaz drags him to the chili*
rampant

12-22-06, 01:08 AM		Jarlot - Where is the mistletoe?

Pholly - Satnak was gathering it all up.

----------------------------------
Terrek's place

Dorvos - hmhmhmhmhmhmhmhm

Teiza - Weheehehehehehe

Corre - Shay-ay-ay-ay-key-ey-ey-ey gr-r-r-r-r-oun-ound!

Terrek - (i.h.h. thats it I'm having shock absorbers installed in their room)
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-22-06, 07:53 AM		Shadow: Oh really? Because I don't remember trying to hunt you to the ends of the earth. I don't remember sending my champion to kill you. I don't remember killing your friend and protector in cold blood.

Elina: I know all the horrible stuff you did to Mom! You're an evil, cruel and heartless monster!

Shadow: A common misconception of me and my brethren. We merely represent the darker aspects of life. Without decay, there can be no progress. Without strife and rivalry, no one is motivated to improve. Existance becomes stagnant and pointless. We are blamed for all the bad, but we play as much a part in keeping this world moving as the Host.
OOcat: I thought so. Death, decay, suffering (not caused by people being jerks), darkness, it's all good.

Bunny: Look at me: am I a bad thing?

13: Most people are idiots. Otherwise we wouldn't really have jobs.
Shadow: ……………Those fools who lay out and follow the Prophesy did the rest.……………
13: The vast majority of prophecies are self-fulfilling. Remember: idiots.
Shadow: ……You have seen the hate, the prejudice, the cruelty this world is strewn with. You can give them a fresh start. A world where the divisions of the past are forgotten.……
OOC: I've actually thought like this. The trick is to remember that you are just as likely to be a sucky jerk as the next guy.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-22-06, 10:10 AM		Lisa: and here I wondered what I saw in you.

Michael: Something a foot long.
OOC: Well, if that was the only thing he had going, it's no wonder he lost so badly. One specific male appendage being impressive can't compete with a dozen quite impressive tentacles, plus intimate knowledge of the female anatomy and preferences, plus the ability to have :pile: on multiple levels of existance at once, plus an almost infinite array of cosplay ideas, plus staying power, plus the ability to actually stay awake after :pile: .

Man, he was pretty much screwed from the get-go. And not in a good way. ;)
Kaizer_Ryu

12-22-06, 11:22 AM		The blackouts had been getting more and more frequent, and the results worse and worse. This time, Elina came to inside a large house absolutely soaked with blood. From the furnishings, it appeared she had stormed a Dol Dornmas party and massacred every living thing. Very little was still recognizable, but body parts were strewn across the floor, the furniture, and even stuck to the ceiling.

Elina: :weep: Wh-what have I done? WHY?!?! :weep:

To her surprise, the language that came from her was not Common. It seemed closer to Infernal. Burying her head in her hands, she noticed that there were exactly twice as many pairs as she should have. A second pair of arms had sprouted from a little beneath her originals. Three fingered hands bore no fingers or claws, but what looked like leeches.

She hadn't really seen what she looked like now, so she went in search of an unbroken mirror. The shattered glass strewn about gave her a glimpse of the monstrocity she had become, but the clearest indication of her current state was in a room on the second floor.

Almost a dozen children lay inside what was probably their play room. The faces twisted in agony, their organs spilling out of their bodies from the gaping wounds. Blood smeared across the walls in various occult symbols. There was no excuse for this. This was nothing more than a brutal and horrific rampage.

Just as she was about to leave, Elina heard a soft rustling in another room. Inside, she saw a small child of maybe five cowering under the bed. He was shaking violently, his eyes closed tightly and his hands covering his mouth trying to surpress the terrified sobs.

This was the final straw. Before the child even knew she was there, she was gone. She would find someplace where she couldn't hurt anyone ever again. If she had to dig down to the depths of Khyber to do it, so be it.
rampant

12-22-06, 11:54 AM		Satnak - purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Serene - You got all the gifts taken care of right?

Satnak - Of course, I'm especially proud of Tirmek's.

Serene - Good girl.
---------------------------------------------------------------

After the return from the OoTS parody (before current arc)

Sarah - This is a kind of wierd gift for a guy.

Elina - You've seen him transformed, he needs them.

Sarah - I kinda like they way it is.:blush:
--------------------------------------------------------------
Again with the before

Ivy - Is this really appropriate brother?

Lily - I don't care at this point, I'm sure he had something to do with those horrible images seared into my brain.

Ivy - He is kinda cute when he-

Lily - :twitch:
urial angel of death

12-22-06, 12:42 PM		Kerrith: SO can I go on some epic quest to save the girl?

OOUrial: No it would mess up Kaizer's excellent story with my mediocore writing even more than I already am, and your a wizard.

Kerrith: What does that have to do with it?!

OOUrial: Name one wizard who got the girl.

Kerrith: :weep:
Lord Kale Fangblade

12-22-06, 02:40 PM		Sithis knelt outside the house retching. the taste of bile bitter in his mouth. he finished retching and stood up. She'd passed through the area at least a few hours ago, but her trail was getting more and more difficult to follow. and it would be impossible to catch her scent over the smell of so much... no he could say it... blood. Sithis moved away from the house. the stench was far too great for him.

Sithis still couldnt understand how Elina could do somthing like this... it seemed so impossible. he would expect someone like him or some other monster to be capable of somthing like this.
His Grandfather had done things far more terrible than this in the past. from what he'd heard from the red shirts and other crew members Naz'roth and Great Aunt Tara could do that without flinching, though they where far more subdued in recent years. and even Uncle Feal-Thas could comit something like that during his bloodlust.
But Elina? it didnt seem possible. It couldnt be.... unless... Yes, she'd seemed distant and distracted recently. that promise breaker stuff had really torn her up.

Sithis grimaced. He needed to find her, her scent recently had changed... it was darker.. he could smell sulpher on it. and ... blood.. lots of blood. Sithis sat down next to the camp he'd prepared in the garden of the house, he was confident that his mental will was strong enough to resist the urge to feed. he hadnt had the stomach to stay in the house after what he'd seen... and the way the only survior had looked... hollow.. empty. Sithis just hoped that those eyes wouldnt haunt him this night.

It had just sat there. staring at the wall. and the blood. Sithis shook himself. he would sleep and wait for the others... yes, that was the best course of action. they knew Elina much better than he did, they'd be able to predict her thought patterns much more acuratly. what was it Feal-Thas had said?
" Stay focused, become your prey, think like they do. and what ever you do, never go into a fight that your unprepaired for"
Sithis calmed his mind and slipped into a light slumber. Images of what he'd seen in the house still engraved in his minds eye.
Lord Kale Fangblade

12-22-06, 02:57 PM		OOC: i wont be able to post for a week. so i thought i'd leave you guys with a few posts.

IC:
Darkness shrouded figure as he watched on, his void black robes seemed to be carved out of the darkness.
the crystal ball glowed with the image of the sleeping form of Sithis, the figure smiled in the depths of its hood. he could see why Kemmler had a great intrest in the child, a living vampire. how intresting. obviously Sa'vor had been experimenting with strands of vampirism, but as extensive enough to give many of the advantages of Vampirism to a living being? that was somthing. somthing new entirely.
Sa'vors Vampires where beyond anything he'd ever seen, they where gods amung vampire kind. the figure smiled. Sa'vors work even equaled its own or kemmlers work.

This other child though.... That was intresting. The figure waved a black gloved hand at the crystal ball, causing the image to shift to Elina. The union of Terra and Lisa, had produced most intresting produce. the figure frowned at the Childs new appearnce. The shadow had been working in strange ways recently, but a child? she was gifted yes, but she was not ready for such a burden. the figure could sense other invovements in its fate, things that had tendrils in many prophecies.

It then waved a hand at the Crystal ball again, bringing up another image, that of Terrek and Drasskar signing their agreement and the black clad lawyer speaking aloud.
So Drasskar had got possession of Sa'vors soul. intresting. and now this Terrek had it, even more intresting. thankfuly Drasskar had left the portal open or he would have missed the whole thing.

the Figure waved a hand at the Crystal ball once more, and the imaged switched to Naz'roth and Tara studying in their dark libary. shame these two hadnt produced any children yet, a new Daemon in the world would be intresting.
the Image switched again to Satnak and Serenes children playing. The Figure smiled, now that was really intresting. but he knew that he couldnt involve himself, these children where off limits. and frankly Satnak scared the living hell out of him. even more so than Sa'vor, Drasskar, Kemmler or Naz'roth. but perhaps not more than Kithle, that half illithid had a mind even he wouldnt delve into.

The Figure waved a hand at the Crystal ball and the light dimmed, the images faded. he smiled and turned, striding off into the darkness.
rampant

12-22-06, 03:52 PM		Kerrith - Ok I understand decorating the mast, but where are the branches coming from?

Izzy - Good question.

Lady - This year they're claiming all the magic the terror twins pumped into it from their little escapade with the wand. I think it just grew hear and they're too lazy to trim it.

Rashour - Where are the lights?

Schroedigger - Oh no :doh:

Dorvos - Who! hmmmmm

Rashour - YOU CAN TALK!

Teiza - Grrrr

Corre - Leave our big bro alone!

Dorvos - Not hmmmmm Easy Hmmmmmm

Rashour - Oh geeze coz i didn't mean anything by it.

Lady - Back to the question, Who has the lights!

Cole - Ok lets give it a go. *ZZZZTZTZTZTZTZTZZTZZZZZZT*

Izzy - MY EYES!

Kerrith - Why was I made to feel pain!

Lady - TOO BRIGHT!

Dorvos - HMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!

Corre - I can't see out my left eyes!

Teiza - GRAAAAAR

A.W.L. - It burns!

Schroedigger - My life is pain!

The lights have been woven deep under the foilage, despite this they shine with unnatural intensity.

Cole - (still slightly crispy) It works!

Kithle - (laying out on a towel wearing sunglasses and holing a tanning mirror) Impressive.

Ash - Thats my boy.:D
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-22-06, 03:52 PM		Bunny appears next to Elina as the latter searches frantically for a plae away from everyone else.

Bunny: I have to say, nice work back there at the house.

Elina breaks down into sobs.

Bunny: Just thought you'd like a complement. :bored: You know, since a lot of people hate you now.

Elina: I DON'T WANT TO BE TOLD I'M GOOD AT BEING A MONSTER!

Bunny: I never said that. I don't get you exitance people. Just because you're becoming a rampant killing machine doesn't mean you're evil.

Elina: They didn't do anything that warranted killing them.

Bunny: :rolleyes: Do you know how debatable that is? I bet I could pick a mortal tradition at random and find a reason why they had to die. I'm not saying you should have :P, I'm just pointing out how you existers keep trying to fool yourselves.

Elina: I didn't want to do it.

Bunny: There we go! Perfectly good reason.

Elina: What? That's what you agree on?

Bunny: Just making a point in this whole thing. Some people do lots of things which they regret because they didn't want to do them. And they actually have more choice in the matter than you do.

Elina: That doesn't make me feel any better. :weep:

Bunny: It doesn't? Boy, this is harder than it looks. Well, if you want some Bunny-style advice, get yourself killed and this'll all be over.

Elina: What? :eek: GET AWAY FROM ME!

Bunny (fading out): :mad: Try to give someone solid advice……
DungeonJman

12-22-06, 04:57 PM		WHERE IS HE ??!?


Darn it! The Shadow left before i could smite him again! Anyway, since no one else is willing to try and stop this, since you're all busy preparing for the holidays, can anyone get me a plane shift to Dolurrh?

*5 guys appear behind him with raise scimitars*

DON'T TRY IT! I come from a different world, so killing me just sends me to the after life of my own world. I need an actual plane shift if this is to work.

Random Redshirt: What do you have against the holidays?

Nothing, but i find this to be more important. Plus, all of these are different versions of religions celebrated back on my world, so there isn't the same attachment.
rampant

12-22-06, 05:05 PM		Tirmek - Keep up you two!

Sarah - What's the hold up?

Rose - chchchchchcchchchchchchchchchchchchhchch chchc

Lily - So cold
Kaizer_Ryu

12-22-06, 08:10 PM		Anyway, since no one else is willing to try and stop this, since you're all busy preparing for the holidays, can anyone get me a plane shift to Dolurrh?
OOC: There will be a way to stop it. Just not now. Let's just say that this arc has been and will continue to be quite painful for me to do. I've never been overly cruel to my characters to this extent, much less to one so naturally pure and innocent. If you think this isn't as bad as some of my previous work, wait till the end...

IC:

Tirmek: Those guards are being difficult.

Sarah: And they keep eyeing me suspiciously.

Tirmek: You're the sister of what they believe will destroy them all. Of course they'd be worried about you.

Lilly: Why do we need to see this woman anyway?

Sarah: She talked with Elina recently. She may have an idea of what is going through her head. That, and we need to find out what the hell is going on here.

The group stands near Lilly Graymorn's home, unable to pass further. What appears to be preparations for war are going on all around them. Soon, a familiar figure catches Sarah's eye.

Feralyn: Sarah?

Sarah: Aunt Feralyn! What's going on here? We need to see Aunt Lilly right away!

Feralyn: Is this about your sister? *Sarah nods* I'll see what I can do. Don't expect any miracles. I'm on thin ice as it is.

She walks over to the guards and speaks with them for a few minutes. After a heated discussion, she comes back somewhat frustrated.

Feralyn: They refuse to let anyone but the boy in.

Lilly: Me? Why me?

Feralyn: Right now trust is in short supply. They figure a Paladin could not willfully aid a being of destruction and death.

Sarah: :mad: Why does everyone assume she's evil just because some stupid prophesy says so?! It doesn't even mention her by name nor has she even done anything yet!

Feralyn: You'd be surprised what people will believe when they want to. I for one don't think Elina is capable of such things of her own will.

Lilly: How long do I have?

Feralyn: When they decide you've been there long enough. I'm sorry I can't do more...

*in the cabin*

For the sake of simplicity, the following conversation will have Mrs. Graymorn listed as Lilly 1, and our favorite Spoony Paladin as Lilly 2.

Lilly 1: Can I help you?

Lilly 2: Well, I hope so Mrs...?

Lilly 1: Lilly. Lilly Graymorn.

Lilly 2: That's weird. Your name is the same as mine.

Lilly 1: :confused: But it's a girl's name.

Lilly 2: I'm pretty sure it's gender neutral, if not masculine.

Lilly 1: ...you know, you remind me of someone. That reasoning makes me even more certain. Might I ask your last name?

Lilly 2: Galan.

Lilly 1: *giggle* That what I thought. Your father's name wouldn't be Rose, would it?

Lilly 2: Uh...yeah...?

Lilly 1: Oh, he's such a sweetheart, naming his child after me. :D

Lilly 2: :twitch:

Lilly 1: But we'll have to talk about that later. You wanted to ask me something?

Lilly 2: Oh! You saw Elina, right? That's why you're in here.

Lilly 1: Yes...the poor dear... :(

Lilly 2: Is she all right? Why did she come here?

Lilly 1: Well...all right is a subjective term. As would be expected, she was an emotional wreck. She was frightened, confused, and in quite a lot of pain.

Lilly 2: Why pain? Was she hurt?!

Lilly 1: No, she's...changing. It's not pretty and it's scaring the living hell out of her. She came here in part to find out why that was happeneing. The other reason was to see if anything could be done. She was particularly certain that you were out to kill her. She refused to go home because she didn't want to fight you.

Lilly 2: ...I have no intention of hurting her, but I know why she's thinking that. So? Did she find anything out?

Lilly 1: We went to speak with Oalian, but were interrupted just as he began to speak. The resulting altercation may end up destroying the peace of the Reaches. Oalian and I are under suspicion of being controlled by and willingly aiding the Promise Breaker, respectively. The Ashbound are leading a call to invade Aundair out of some twisted idea that they have aided her as well.

Lilly 2: I...

Lilly 1: Don't even think about mixing youself up in this. When you go back, tell your friends not to do anything stupid. This place is on edge, and civil war is only an incident away.

Lilly 2: ...I need to find her. The quicker the better. Do you have any idea where she went?

Lilly 1: I'm sorry. Everything happened so fast, the best I could do is help her escape. I have no idea where she could be now.

Guard: You've been in there long enough! Out!

Lilly 1: Please...find her. Make sure she knows you're on her side.

*back outside*

Tirmek: Well?

Lilly: We need to talk to Oalian.

Sarah: Yeah right. They aren't even letting cute woodland creatures in there. How are we gonna do it without causing trouble? The Manifest zone makes warping in too risky.

Tirmek: Psychic projection. If I can make it so I can talk to Oalian's mind directly, no one should be the wiser. They're not exactly brimming with psychics here.

OOC: Ok, once again I must stop for dinner. I'll do more in a bit.
DungeonJman

12-22-06, 08:36 PM		[insert long paladin morality monologue here] Sorry OOKaizer, i'm trying to restrain myself here, but for the reasons you described, i feel that i can't just stay back. It's kind of hard to just do nothing, when an innocent soul is being forcibly bound into slavery.[/insert long paladin monologue here]

(It is now safe to continue listening)

Although Dolurrh is a lot different from what the people on Eberron are told:

*a bureacracy is seen with a bunch of souls standing around, while Maruts are filing folders, which contain the details of peoples lives. Based on the information gathered, the souls are told to go down the halls to different sections, where they are further subcategorized until they reach their appropriate spots in the afterlife, or head to the domains of their deities.*

Soul of a recently departed Redshirt: AAAAH!! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!

Marut: Be quiet and stay in line, now fill out this form here, here, here, and place a strawberry here.

SOARDR: Fine, fine.

*takes out a pen and after signing some documents, takes out a single strawberry and places it on the last paper.*
Charles Phipps

12-22-06, 08:45 PM		OOC: At the risk of ruining Kaizer_Ryu's story, this is entirely optional canon for the Elina story.

It will be about six parts.

Part I.

Fleshweaver Tower

Elina: I suppose this is the only place I can flee. Thankfully, Mordain is still bound away under the dungeons.

Igor: HELLO ELINA!

Elina: YOU!

Igor: Yes, me!

Elina: Actually, I don't recognize you.

Igor: Well, not in all this Grima Wormtongue makeup.

Elina: What's happened to the tower? This is completely different than before.

Igor: Well since Peter Jackson isn't directing the Hobbit, they sold us the Tower of Isengard.

Elina: Oh no!

Igor: Yes. Now at last we have a base to CONQUER THE WORLD!

Elina: Peter Jackson isn't directing the Hobbit!?!

Igor: The Master will be right with you.

*Elina and Igor walk into the big central room where Mordain holds his hands over a crystal ball while his other hand clenches a crystal staff*

Mordain: Together, my lord Khyber, we shall rule this Eberron. The old world will burn in the fires of industry. Forests will fall. A new order will rise. We will drive the machine of war with the sword and the spear and the iron fist of the orc.

Elina: Ahem.

*Mordain looks up from the big glowing ball*

Mordain: Oh hello Elina. I was just practicing my Christopher Lee voice.

Elina: At last, an evil enemy to stop! I shall prove my goodness by beating you!

Mordain: You look tired and exhausted. I've already prepared a bed for you, a nice meal, and some fresh cookies if you like.

Elina: :twitch:

Mordain: Oh Elina, Elina, I'm your godfather!

Elina: Huh?

Mordain: It is a godfather's place to provide spiritual and ethical guidance to his godchild along with succor should they be troubled.

Elina: But....but you're evil!

Mordain: Against those who hate the undead and monsters forging a civilization for themselves.

Elina: I just heard that speech!

Mordain: Diplomacy. The Nations of Men are disgusting places of bigotry and horror. They fear humanoids might raise a new nation for themselves and worse try to keep the goblins in gutteral poverty

Elina: I won't be tricked again.

Mordain: You don't have to be my Queen. I offer you my psylantery as a promise.

*Elina stared as the Lich gave her the amulet*

Mordain: My life is in your hands. I also offer you the full forces of my people and kingdom. Since the evil paladin Lilly slayed the Hags of Sora Kell, I have had to take up rulership of this realm to protect them from the persecution of xenophobic humans.

Elina: I....don't understand.

Mordain: The Dragon Prophecy and the Dark Six are human things. In our lands, they are called the Six Gods of Strength and the Prophecy of Redemption. You see Elina, you are the one destined to liberate the so called monster races from bondage.

Elina: :stare:

Mordain: If you do not want destiny then I say you don't have to take it up. It is a heroic thing than an evil one and I will protect you until a willing successor can be groomed. In the meantime, stay here amongst friends. You remember Doog Junior and Thorn? Perhaps also we can summon some fairy friends from the Unseelie? You love werewolves don't you?

Elina: I'm tired.

Mordain: Then get in your pyjammas and use your spells to know I speak the truth.

*Elina strangely collapsed as Mordain's slaves took her to her bed*

Mordain: Sleep well....my Queen.

*sneer*
DungeonJman

12-22-06, 09:05 PM		*heads down to the lower part of the ship and begins building a specially designed box*

Man, i'm going to need this stupid thing, and this time i can control myself long enough to build it. There, the prototype is done.

+5 Box of Containment of Irrational Smiters

Now, how can i test it?

Flamite Kanatash: I have been lax in smiting all the sinners on this ship! Now you all will pay!

That'll do.

*as the Flamite Kanatash begins to run at him, he puts it inside of the box*

There, now accordingly, this thing should keep him there, until he stops wanting to irrationally smite people, so if he stays in there for 24 hours, it will be a success, and i'll let him out.
Charles Phipps

12-22-06, 09:14 PM		Fleshweaver Tower

Khyber: *appearing as Achika* She is not ready yet.

Mordain: She is lost, confused, and troubled by the death of a close friend. Controlling her will not be difficult.

Khyber: I believe she requires further convincing that the evils of Man must be quenched.

Mordain: Do not forget Lady Ti'amat that it was I whom conjured this body for you. It took 25,000 years of evil to build up and the opening up of a Rajah's mind to create this suitable vessel for your avatar.

Khyber: Indeed. You have been a most loyal servant Mordain. I want you to begins attacks against the Reachers.

Mordain: My forces are barely building up.

Khyber: You have been studying Dhakaani cloning technology for centuries. Already, ranks of warforged and biologically engineered Hobgoblin soldiers are being prepared. How many do you have, 5 or 6 thousand?

Mordain: Err....sixty.

Khyber: Only sixty troopers?

Mordain: *cough* Actually, sixty thousand hobgoblins. I just want to be absolutely SURE when I unleash my hordes of fleshwoven monsters.

Khyber: That grossly outnumbers the entire Reaches forces!

Mordain: Well obviously I'm not including my tentacle monsters.

Khyber: Mordain, what have I said about those things?

Mordain: I no longer use them for pornographic purposes....much.

Khyber: *sigh*

Mordain: Or the Demon Dragons....or the Balor's army from Shelvaresh....or the undead.

Khyber: Fleshweaver, what have we said about overplanning?

Mordain: Err...don't?

Khyber: YES!

***

Eldeen Reaches

Narrator: The forces of Mordain pour forth as the biological warforged substitutes in the Hellforged are fusions of warforged grafts to Dhakaani bodies and zombie parts. The monstrous things are an abomination against god and man but even more formidable than the average warforged.

Woman: SCREAM!

Old Man: AHHhhhhhhhh!

Child: COOL! ZOMBIE CYBORG GOBLINS!

Narrator: Some having slightly different reactions of course.

Cyborg Goblin Commander: *tosses down Brelish standard after the battle*

***

Later that Day

The completely slaughtered remnants of the village

Elina: My god, what could have done this.

Mordain: The armies of King Stephen seems to be whose responsible. To the North Old Queen Aurala will appear to have done the same.

Elina: But...why?

Mordain: Miscenegation.

Elina: Huh?

Mordain: They interbred with orcs and lived in peace with them. For that, they had to die.

Elina: But that's awful!

Mordain: It has taken many years to build up their armed forces but the old prejudices of Galifar return. Dargunn, Droam, the Shadow Marches....ghettos for the hatred of the darker peoples of the world. They will be invaded and slain to the last once the forces are rebuilt. It may take long with the goblin warriors but they have plenty of time to slay as many civilians as they can. Already, their magicians work on spreading diseases like the coughing death and the Red Pox via cursed blankets.

Elina: I can't...believe that.

Mordain: They hate you for no reason other than your status in a prophecy. Why do you not believe they can irrationally hate others. Of course, it is your role in the Prophecy to break the mind control of the Host.

Elina: Huh?

Mordain: You are to free them from secret control of others. That is the nature of the Promise Breaker.

Elina: :stare:

Mordain: Yes....good.

And Mordain had not lied directly....only mislead.
DungeonJman

12-22-06, 09:21 PM		*begins building a second box*

Must.. breath.. and.. resist..evil. Sheesh, the way things are turning out, i'm gonna have to build this thing a lot faster or get Io or Bahamut to straighten things out
Charles Phipps

12-22-06, 09:21 PM		OOC: If you like, I'd actually not mind you showing up at a dramatic moment in this plotline.

;-)
rampant

12-22-06, 09:22 PM		Tirmek - Ok I need Elina to take sentry, I'm the only one here who can initiate, Rose you know the area so you're with Sarah. Lily You're with me, i can drag you along for the ride.

Sarah - Why does he get to go?

Tirmek - Because he's useless as a sentry.

Lily - Why you!

Tirmek - Even with your new powers I could break my glasses, stab myself in eyes with the shards, and still have a higher spot check.

Lily - It hurts, because its true.
DungeonJman

12-22-06, 09:24 PM		Evil Inclination- Oh, you're no fun.

You're just saying that because you want to get out and see if you can break Kanatash. I'm not even going to ask where you got the ghost touch lemon-scented cleaner.

Oh and for the record, one of the lawful good people on the ship is the avatar of bahamut, not me.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-22-06, 09:56 PM		OOC: At the risk of ruining Kaizer_Ryu's story, this is entirely optional canon for the Elina story.
OOC: Well, so far it's not too against what I had in mind. What I was going for with the Reaches side story was that her very presence causes suffering, discord, and war. By merely showing up, she inadvertantly causes old hatreds and divisions to flare up again. Think the Twilight Zone episode "Monsters due on Maple Street". Each faction thinks the other side(s) are working with the one who will destroy them.

Besides, when you look like she does right now, that's gonna cause panic pretty much anywhere you go.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-22-06, 10:04 PM		……………………………………………………

Silver: So, are we going to comment?

Bunny: I don't think we could point out how stupid these people are being any better than they're already doing.
Oh and for the record, one of the lawful good people on the ship is the avatar of bahamut, not me.
Avatar of Bahamut: Ah, my lovely Teraza, it is such a shame we cannot consumate our love.

Teraza: I love it when you talk all formal. ;) But I have good news, I've descovered the secret ingrediant to a powerful virility soup.

AvB: What?

Teraza: The tail of a perfectly ordinary rat.

AvB: Wow. I never would have thought of that. But then, the rats in this world are usually insanely powerful to cope with the commoner-destroying cats.

Teraza: And I've already forseen how we're going to get it: we'll trade some clue-less schmucks a couple of prestige classes for it.
*******
Nalfein, Stupid, and Kithle (plus a shadowed third party waiting in the wings): Achoo!
DungeonJman

12-22-06, 10:07 PM		Ok for the record, i meant that as an opposite of Tiamat. Where Tiamat was pretending to be Achika, someone already on the ship is the unknowing Avatar of Bahamut.

(I already know who it is and the perfect way to get rid of Mordain's lies by who it is.)
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-22-06, 10:23 PM		Ok for the record, i meant that as an opposite of Tiamat.
OOC: It's a 8-bit theater joke. You won't get it unless you've read the whole thing.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-22-06, 10:24 PM		(I already know who it is and the perfect way to get rid of Mordain's lies by who it is.)
Remember, run it by me first if you want to do something. Charles knows the general shape this arc is taking, and he's been PM me with quieries, comments, suggestions, etc. (which have helped temendously in forming what has happened so far). There is a difference between contributing and railroading. What you're suggesting sounds an awful lot like the latter. I may very well be wrong and am being overprotective. I'd just rather you knew some of what is to come before destroying/removing/discrediting/etc a major player.
Charles Phipps

12-22-06, 10:28 PM		OOC: In general, I welcome DungeonJman to participate so long as he doesn't just randomly show up at Mordain's place but sticks with our heroes. It's my DM's decision that not even Terra can break into his realm.

As a note, Khyber is 60th level in her avatar and Mordain has since raised to being 22nd level due to her aid.
DungeonJman

12-22-06, 10:35 PM		Well, the thing is that the Avatar of Bahamut isn't human, but considering that for the time being, you don't want anyone interfering...

*puts himself into the +5 Box of Containment of Railroaders/Irrational Smiters/etc. and closes the top*
Charles Phipps

12-22-06, 10:38 PM		Kitten, are you Bahamut!?

Kitten: Help! STILL BEING SNUGGLED BY AERITH!
Paulon

12-22-06, 10:41 PM		Well, the thing is that the Avatar of Bahamut isn't human, but considering that for the time being, you don't want anyone interfering...

*puts himself into the +5 Box of Containment of Railroaders/Irrational Smiters/etc. and closes the top*

*several miles of chains wrap themselves around the box and weld themselves into place, sealing it completely from physical, magical, or extradimensional tampering or escape* :P
Charles Phipps

12-22-06, 11:03 PM		The forest of Oalian

Zella: *wearing breaches, her red hair in a pony tail, and firing arrows* Damnit! Where the hell did all these Warhammer rejects come from?

Rose: Probably Warhammer.

*Zella proves an excellent marksman even as Rose uses a crossbow with explosive bolts to wipe out the enemies one at a time*

Lilly: What the hell are these things?

Warden Ebbergon (No relation to Ara or Era): The forces of the Promise Breaker! At last she has come to destroy us!

Sarah: I don't believe this!

*the Forest like town is attacked by wave after wave of bio-mechanical warriors wielding advanced weaponry*

***

Fleshweaver Tower

Mordain: The Promise Breaker terrifies the populous. She breaks them with their very premise. They are broken and divided in fear.

Igor: Why?

Mordain: You don't understand concepts of instinct like the Ancient Dhakaani did or genes.

Igor: Should I?

Mordain: All beings have an instinctual fear of fire, darkness, etc. Well, its possible to program the fear of something more of a genetic aspect into the consciousness of humans with a primordial horror of the Promise Breaker.

Igor: Fascinating sir.

Mordain: Yes, the Promise Breaker's presence mean all people will rise up against her because their innate loathing is so intense that it drives them beyond all reason. Milder aversions are incorporated via hypnosis.

*Mordain pulls out the Sharn Inquisitor and hands Igor a pair of spectacles*

Igor: It says *Fnord* Orcs and humans should hate one another. *Fnord*

Mordain: All the coins also say 'This is Your God'.

Igor: We knew that. So she has nowhere to run?

Mordain: No, only a precious few human beings. Mostly of elf descent are unaffected by the condition. Elina is their foe no matter what they believe. The monsters have a condition to follow her...IF its to destroy.

Igor: Insidious.

Mordain: Yes, pity I didn't think of it.

***

Lilly: RIDE EM DRAGON!

*Dragonfire hits the groups of the monsters moving on their campaign of genocide*

Sarah: Where did Lilly get an Adult Gold Dragon?

Rose: Sold his Unicorn on Ebay and sniped a low bid for him.

Sarah: Oiye!

Ebbergon: AT LAST! THE CHOSEN ONE WHO SHALL RIDE A DRAGON AND DEFEAT THE PROMISE BREAKER!

Tirmek: Damnit! I don't care if there is a movie about it! I *HATE* those books.

Lilly: Quiet Harry Potter.

OOC: DungeonJman is welcome to join in with any others who want to fight against M's armies.
DungeonJman

12-22-06, 11:09 PM		Stop trying to reveal the avatar of Bahamut, it will be revealed when the time comes.

*knocking is heard*

AND SOMEONE LET ME OUT OF THIS BOX!!!
rampant

12-22-06, 11:15 PM		Kithle - (looks at DungeonJ's box) :evillaugh:

in the box

DungeonJ - Whats that sound? hey! ouch! I should have had this thing marked fragile!
-------------------------------
Frostfell

Little grey kitten - Aren't I the cutest kitten in the world? :bigeyes:

DungeonJ - *shiver*
----------------------------

:gift: for the first one to get the reference
Charles Phipps

12-22-06, 11:16 PM		Hey Nermal!

Kitten: Hey!

Nermal: AHHHH! HORROR FROM BEYOND!

Kitten: Why does no one love me?
DungeonJman

12-22-06, 11:21 PM		Kithle you ... do I really even need to say it?

so cold, so cold, and it's dark.

Wait :lightbulb

*takes light bulb and puts it down in the box, so there's light at least*
Kaizer_Ryu

12-22-06, 11:29 PM		OOC: Sorry, I couldn't resist.

IC:

The light reveals something even more horrible than Nermal.

Cheese: I. Like. Chocolate. Milk.

DungeonJ: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! *begins frantically trying to escape, causing the box to rock and slowly tumble down a slope*

Cheese: WHEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!! *deep, nasally inhale* WHEEEEEEEEE!!!!! *ad infinitum*

*at the bottom*

Cheese: :D Doitagaindoitagaindoitagaindoitagaindoit againdoitagaindoitagaindoitagaindoitagai ndoitagaindoitagaindoitagaindoitagaindoi tagaindoitagaindoitagaindoitagaindoitaga indoitagaindoitagaindoitagaindoitagaindo itagaindoitagaindoitagaindoitagaindoitag ain!!!!! :D

DungeonJ: :twitch:
rampant

12-22-06, 11:31 PM		:gift: for Charles
------------------------------

Kithle - Yes you have to say it or I clonk ya one.

DungeonJ - FIne You Magnificent bastard.

CLONK!

Kithle - Never said I wouldn't if you did.
Charles Phipps

12-23-06, 12:14 AM		The official comic of this game

http://www.ctrlaltdel-online.com/comic.php?d=20030331
rampant

12-23-06, 01:08 AM		OORampant - Not to be a jerk but I'd prefer to be back to the crazy by christmas, I've got a wholle slew of ideas that just seem wrong to use during the arc. That and its depressing, I don't want any depressing on christmas. Hehehehehe "dol dornmas gifts".

Tirmek - Why do it's words fill me with dread?
Paulon

12-23-06, 01:23 AM		OORampant - Not to be a jerk but I'd prefer to be back to the crazy by christmas, I've got a wholle slew of ideas that just seem wrong to use during the arc. That and its depressing, I don't want any depressing on christmas. Hehehehehe "dol dornmas gifts".

Tirmek - Why do it's words fill me with dread?

Because this is the EBNE who created Kithle, the Magnificent Bastard, and who never fails to attempt to exceed his prior actions.

*thinks that more of Kithle would make this thread even more entertaining.*
Charles Phipps

12-23-06, 01:29 AM		OOC: We'll see what we can do.

I'll wrap up my Mordain plot in my next big post.

But honestly, if you just want to exploit the time loop properties of the ship and post "And after all that Promise Breaker Stuff was resolved" then that might be a good idea to explore.

Besides, Dol Dornmas also has the unique quality of bringing Doog and Ivy back from the dead and making all to righT!
rampant

12-23-06, 01:31 AM		OORampant - Well you see he's getting so expensive...I kinda had to cut back on his appearences in order to be able to afford Dol Dornmas.

OOPaulon - So he's moved on to messing with the us huh?

OORampant - Yeah pretty much.

...

Wait a minute when did Doog die?

Doog - You really know how to make a guy feel appreciated don'tcha *sarcasm*.
Charles Phipps

12-23-06, 01:37 AM		After All that Promise Keeper Business was Resolved....

Year 17 after the Last War

Rose: Wow, that was fun to resolve.

Sarah: I have boobies now!

Rose: GAH! Don't mention that!

Zella: Is a time skip ahead two years allowed?

Rose: Technically, our comic book got cancelled because the arc was too depressing.

Zella: Oh no!

Rose: So the new writer on Eberron the comic, just decided to skip us ahead two years since he figured no one cared about the previous arc. The resolution will be filled in by mini series.

Tirmek: What does that mean about Elina's fate?

Rose: Much like the DC comic 52, we won't mention Elina until this is done. In the meantime, you can differentiate your posts by stating whether they take place in 15 A.W. or not.

Sarah: So whether she lives or dies will be up in the air until then.

Rose: Yes, to also keep Drama, Lilly's fate also precludes him from showing up.

Lilly: What? I'm right here!

Rose: Yes, my poor son and his current status will be left to chance the entire time!

Lilly: DAMNIT!

Rose: On the other hand, the lovable antics of THORN and Thog...err Doog Junior will take place on the ship to fill us in for the loss of...uhh...whats his name.

Lilly: LILLY!

Doog: And Doog!

Lilly: Who the hell are you?

Doog: I hate you all.

Rose: You know, I forgot when he died too.

Lilly: Something about thinking two Doogs was too confusing. He died like a punk.

Doog Jr.: Doog Junior now the only Doog. Doog would be sadder if not for big fat contract.

Doog: THE STEVE IRWIN CLONE GOT A FUNERAL!!

Rose: Oh crap, did someone remember to open DungeonJman's box?
rampant

12-23-06, 01:43 AM		Klaz - I'm not dead yet!

Vrin - What are you gonna do? bite my ankles?

*Chomp*
Charles Phipps

12-23-06, 01:51 AM		OOC: Hopefully, this will free you up for what needs to be done and more humorous stories.

:-)

Otherwise it's just more hours of Michael passed out into the figgy pudding.
rampant

12-23-06, 02:22 AM		Otherwise it's just more hours of Michael passed out into the figgy pudding.

You act like that's not enough.
I don't wanna ruin the big joke before the 25th buuuuut

13 - that look in his eye, yeah that one, means I'm about one very happy not-critter.
---------------------------------------------------------------------

Pholly - (downing coffee at an alarming rate) He just waiting for me to slip up, I know it!

over a few tables

Norbaz - What did you do to him this time?

Kithle - Nothing

Norbaz - :confused:

Kithle - Its brilliant in its simplicity.

Later in the corridors

Kithle - Hey pholly (walks on by)

Pholly - (i.h.h. what is he planning!)
Kaizer_Ryu

12-23-06, 10:50 AM		Just so everyone is on the same page, this list will detail all the revealed Chosen. In order to help correct my current funny deficit, it will be in the format of a conversation between myself and Charles.

OOKaizer: As far as Chosen are concerned, where do we stand?

OOCharles: We've got most of them in place. Terra used to be the Chosen of Shadow.

OOKaizer: When she rejected that, Elina became the new one. Sarah is Chosen of the Fury.

OOCharles: Where does that fit in with all the scheming?

OOKaizer: Whatever Sarah chooses to do, she'll go all out in that endeavor.

OOCharles: That's it?

OOKaizer: The Fury isn't real big on planning.

OOCharles: :bored: Meh, good point.

OOKaizer: Lilly is obviously the Chosen of Dol Arrah.

Lilly: :censored: that!

OOCharles: Quiet you.

OOKaizer: Ivy was Chosen of the Keeper.

Ivy: :D And I'm back for Keepermas!

OOKaizer: How many freaking holidays are celebrated on this day?

OOCharles: Too many.

OOKaizer: Who am I missing?

OOCharles: Well, there's the Chosen of the Mockery.

Mordain: Yo.

Elina: *gnaw* *chew* *munch*

Mordain: *anime sweatdrop* You know, with her transforming into an abberant hellspawned lycanthrope, I should have expected this...

Elina happliy wags her tail as Mordain is dragged away with his shin bone in her jaws.

OOCharles: The Chosen of Dol Dorn and Arawai have been implied, just never stated.

Jarlot: ALL HAIL THE MIGHTY BANJO! *holds up a puppet clown*

Aerith: *sigh* Give it a rest, hon. All his followers are waiting for the Call of Banjulhu.

Jarlot: *emo cultist single tear*

Smig: As the Chosen of the Mighty Banjulu, I declare your lives forfeit!

Jarlot: *kicks Smig over the side* Oh well. At least Mom isn't upset that I'm not her Chosen anymore.

Achika: :mad: And that worked out SO well for me, Uncle.

Jarlot: Gah! My niece that has always been so but never actually stated as such!

Rose: I KNEW there was a reason I hung out around you.

OOCharles: Speak of the Spoony Chosen.

Rose: Oh, come on! The Traveler is cool!

Jarlot: :rolleyes: Suuuuurreee he is...

OOCharles: Then there's Olladra's Chosen.

Zella: Hiya!

OOKaizer: So purposely getting kidnapped by every bad guy out there and bilking both them and the heros who rescue you out of their fortunes makes you Chosen of Olladra?

Zella: *sits on her throne made of gold and precious jewels carried by Redshirts* It's a very high risk, high return endeavor.

OOKaizer: Oooooookay...

OOCharles: We all know who the Chosen of the SIlver Flame is.

*silence*

OOCharles: Where the hell is she?

Lisa: *running in* Sorry, Jaela told me to let you know she'll be busy for the next few hours.

OOCharles: What could be more important than this?

-----

*various suspicious noises can be heard eminating from Jaela and Parn's room*

-----

OOCharles: Oh.

OOKaizer: We know who Aureon's Chosen is, but no one else gets to find out yet. (OOC: Only Charles and I get to know this right now. You'll find out when the time comes :D :P )

OOCharles: The Devourer's keeps getting eaten by that mountain lion.

OOKaizer: :twitch: That post was wrong on so many levels.

OOCharles: And that's it.

OOKaizer: Don't we have five left?

OOCharles: DungeonJman says he knows who Bahamut's avatar is, so the Chosen of Syberis has supposedly been done. As for Balinor, Boldrei, Kol Korran, and Eberron...it gives room to maneuver for later.
Crystalforged

12-23-06, 11:37 AM		OOC: Alrighty then, here it is. Before I begin I just want to mention that while I’ve only written out about a dozen of Kitten’s tragic little “encounters” in her travels that’s only due to lazyness on my part. She’s probably had four or five times that number. Just something to keep in mind. This encounter isn’t what brought on the changes, they’re just the straws that broke the camels back.



IC: Kitten has had a hard day. First she’s pursued by some crazy lady’s cats, then she is roped into some scheme with demonic animals and nearly brings about the birth of the antichrist, next she gets assaulted by the crazy lady who showed up in the forest with the shotgun, after she escapes she gets doused in blood by some crazy PETA activist for killing the mountain lion, the blood had the unfortunate effect of attracting the cats sent after her by the crazy lady earlier. At least they ate the PETA protester in the process. Then when the cats were dragging her back to Maivy when the Half-Biscuts and Half-tosters attacked, taking her prisoner and attempting to burn her at the stake. Unfortunately they didn’t account for the wooden walls and the fire quickly got out of hand, baking the biscuts. Then the fire extinguishers went off (what? You think the ship doesn’t have them? How do you think this flying fire hazard lasted this long?) shorting out the half-tosters. Kitten then managed to crawl back up to the upper decks, just in time to be in the way of Micheal as he stormed out from watching the video with Terra and Lisa and became one of the many people in his path to get stabbed. She was then carried over to the Mickey’s to be examined. Unfortunately Mickey had been drinking like a fish in the spirit of Dol-Dornmas so he splashed alcohol all over her wounds, making them hurt like the devil, and she was pretty sure he left something in her when he sewed her up. She wasn’t sure but it was sharp and pointy, probably glass from a broken bottle.

Needless to say she was a bit frazzled when she stumbled into the redshirt quarters.

Kaz: (grabbing Kitten from behind) Oy, lokey here we got ourselves a fine specimine.

Redshirt: Cut it out dude, we all know you’re not the real Kaz, you can’t even do the accent right. Have some respect for the dead.

Real Kaz: But I’m not dead!

Redshirt: (throwing a can at the real Kaz) Quiet you! Dead people don’t talk!

Fake Kaz: Now unlike my predecessor who was a Reptopheliac, I am instead a Felinpherliac. Now I’m just gonna stick my finger in its bung-hole and see what kinda reaction I can get outa the shiela.

Kitten: HELP! SOMEONE GET ME AWAY FROM THESE FREAKS!!!

UBER HAMMERING

Lisa stands behind the now broken and bloody Fake Kaz.

Lisa: There was a reason I got this thing enchanted with pervert bane. (turning to the other redshirts) Alright, I want the rest of you out of here and you better hope I don’t see any of you again. Now get!

Redshirts: Eep. (all flee)

Lisa: (sigh) Sometimes I don’t know why I bother stopping the crew from slaughtering them all. (turns to Kitten) Are you ok honey?

Kitten: (visably shaken) Y, yes.

Lisa: Why don’t you come back to my room for a little bit so you can calm down a bit?

Kitten: Ok.

---

Back at Terra and Lisa’s room.

Lisa: (walking in) I need to check on a few things. It’s a personal thing, you don’t need to get involved. (walking out of the room) I’m watching Teiza and Corre for the moment, I hope you don’t mind.

Kitten: Who?

Teiza and Corre come charging out of a side room, tackling Kitten from either side.

Teiza: So cute.

Corre: Huggably soft.

Kitten: (turning blue) Can’t breath… So tight… Everything going dark… Goodby cruel world…

A trap door opens suddenly under Kitten’s feet, pulling her out from between T&C and closing just behind her.

Both: Awww…

---

Somewhere below the deck.

Kitten: Ow… I think I bumped my head. (looking around) Where am I?

A small shape steps out of the shadows. A small teddy bear shaped figure.

Roosevelt: Sorry about your head, I figured I needed to get you out of there in a hurry. It looked like much longer with those two and you would have been liquefied.

Kitten: Uh, yeah, thanks for getting me out of there. (sniffle)

Roosevelt: Heh, don’t worry, I’ve been there.

Kitten: (Fighting back sobs) I… Just… (starts all out bawling)

Roosevelt: What is it? Are you sure you’re all right?

Kitten: I’m fine (sniff) Its just seems like no matter what I do, (sniff) no matter how nice people seem, (sniff) things always go wrong. (sob) Everybody hates me and everything I touch blows up in my face! (bawls)

Roosevelt: Ok, ok, calm down. It’s going to be ok. Now why do you think the world is against you?

*one very long and tear filled story later*

Roosevelt: (sigh) Look kid, I don’t know how to put this… All of this, all this misfortune, put bluntly, is because of you.

Kitten: (big teary anime eyes)

Roosevelt: (quickly) That’s not to say its your fault, you couldn’t help it. It’s just because of who you are. (sigh) Look kid, your cute, that’s part of your problem really, but you see the thing is this is the way the world works.

Kitten: (through bleary eyes) What do you mean?

Roosevelt: The fact is that what you want is a normal, regular life and you have a hell of a lot of chips set against you in that. For one you’ve got your heritage, you’re spawn of the Forgotten Freedom, the primary source of chaos and destruction in this world. People hate and fear this ship and everything associated with it. Not only that but you’re the child of Kanatash and Caralot, probably the craziest people on this ship, you may know you want a normal life but you have no idea what one is so you hardly know how to live one. Beyond that you’re both naive and cute.

Kitten: What does that mean? I don’t understand.

Roosevelt: Look kid, I hate to shatter your preconceptions about the world but it has to be done. The world is a cruel, hard place and that’s something you need to be aware of if you’re going to have any chance of making it. People do not understand things that are different from themselves. People fear that which they do not understand. People hate what they fear. You are different, you are associated with something people fear, with something many people have reason to hate. Not only that but you are naïve, there are many, many people who will take advantage of that. Most people care only for themselves and to them you’re nothing more than an easy mark. Even more, you’re cute. People love cute things but that’s not necessarily good for the cute things. They will use and abuse that which is cute because it distracts them, if only for a moment, from the fact that their own lives are bleak and pointless. Trust me about these things. I have first hand experience. The world sucks. People are ***holes. Most of them don’t deserve to live. The sooner you come to accept that the better chance you have of living something resembling a happy life.

Kitten: Can’t I change? Stop being these things?

Roosevelt: You can try I suppose. But this is who you are. Some things just aren’t easy to change. Not to mention the fact that you have to ask yourself how long you could live a lie?

Kitten: So what can I do?

Roosevelt: (sigh) Go back to your parents kid. They really do have your best interests at heart. They care about you and they will do whatever they can to see you happy. Their actions may not seem it but their hearts are pure, in regards to you if nothing else. They can help you.

Kitten: I, I know you’re right. I should go back. (glancing up) Maybe you could come too? You’re stories, they sound so sad. Maybe things could get better.

Roosevelt: (sad chuckle) You really are a good kid. No, it wouldn’t work. It’s too late for me I’m afraid. Whatever I may like to tell myself otherwise about being feared or respected, to everyone I’m just this cute little thing they can use and abuse to make themselves feel better. It’s a temptation even the most pure at heart cannot resist.

A rumbling suddenly shakes the floorboards. Teiza and Corre suddenly burst down from above.

Corre: Found you!

Teiza: Look, another one! He’s cute too!

Roosevelt: (Jumping between the twins and Kitten) Run kid, get out of here! I’ll distract them.

Kitten: (wiping a tear from her eye) I won’t forget you!

Roosevelt: Just go kid!

Kitten runs off into the darkness as the twins proceed to hug Roosevelt mercilessly.

---

It’s pouring rain with lighting and thunder pounding the decks as a soaked Kitten stands before the door to her parent’s room and knocks. Loud creaking and moaning can be heard from inside. When she knocks the sounds stop immediately. Moments later a disheveled Kanatash and Caralot stand at the door.

Kanatash: (embracing Kitten) Oh, my baby, you’re back!

Caralot: We were just, uh, were…

Kitten: It’s ok dad, I know what you were doing.

Caralot: (smiles slightly) That’s daddy’s little girl.

Kanatash: Oh, Kitten I’m so glad you came back to me. Are you ok?

Kitten: (a very grim look coming over her face) No, I’m not ok. I’ve seen the world now. I’ve tricked, abused, violated, attacked, and discriminated against in more ways than I thought possible. I’ve seen what people are like and I hate them. I hate them all and I want to see them all returned to the dust from whence they came.

Kanatash and Caralot just glance at each other for a moment before Caralot pulls Kanatash aside.

Kanatash: I, I’m so sorry. I wanted her to stop being so naïve about people but I never wanted it to go this far. By the Great Old Ones, what have I done to her? I don’t deserve to call myself her parent anymore

Caralot: Sh, sh, look I have an idea. Maybe it will set things right…



OOC: Alright I’m leaving it there for you silver. Sorry I didn’t get it up last night, I had relatives show up early for Christmas and it took longer than I expected to type this out. Once again sorry it took so long to get it done.
Charles Phipps

12-23-06, 12:11 PM		Bravo Crystal. Bravo.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-23-06, 12:31 PM		Later Lucky and Erk are patching up Roosevelt when Caralot walks in.

Caralot: Erk, I need to ask, can your doorway transport someone in the bar to a specific world other than the one they came from?

Erk: Lucky, can you handle the rest of this on your own? (turns to Caralot) It's not supposed to work that way, but it's theoretically possible.

Caralot: Only theoretical?

Erk: It's an adventure doorway, it's either supposed to just let people exit their own reality for a break, or mystically transport them to where they are needed—or where it is the most comical. But you're looking to send Kitten to your origin universe.

Caralot: Yes, I talked about it before.

Erk: First thing to try is your parents to come the bar and take Kitten with them. That has the highest likelyhood of working.

Caralot: You're not worried about the chaos magic?

Erk: I deliberately account for such unusual variance in existance energy when the place was built. Also, as a multi-/non-dimensional space it should be immune to that sort of physics rejection.

Caralot: Good. I'll give a letter to 13. He can deliver anywhere.
************
Back at their quarters, Caralot knocks on Kitten's door.

Kitten: Go away.

Caralot: You're too young to be getting teenager-emo. But if you want we can talk through the door.

There is the click of a lock. The door opens a crack.

Kitten: What is it?

Caralot: I'd like you to spend some time with my parents in their dimension.

Kitten: Is it any better than this one?

Caralot: I'd hestitate to say that, but yeah. (Caralot sits down so that she can see Kitten through the crack in the door) My universe isn't founded on the principle that there is danger and mean people around every corner, like this one is. In my dimension the fact that people encounter what in this universe are considered "monsters" means that there is a lot more acceptance of differences, even if people can still be very bigoted.

Kitten opens the door the rest of the way.

Kitten: It sounds a lot better. So why'd you say you were hesitant?

Caralot: I won't claim its perfect, or doesn't have some of the same problems, but it is less extreme. I want you to see all the things you saw in this universe without having to run away while doing so.

Kitten: :mad: I doubt it. People are stupid.

Caralot: *sigh* :rolleyes: I'm not saying they aren't. I just want you to see what that "stupid" means and why it exists. Please, trust me.

Kitten: :bored: *sigh* Okay.

Caralot: But first I'd better tell you everything about me and my family. I have a bad habit of forgetting to do that. Almost didn't marry your mother because of it.

OOC: Okay, rules for this story arc: please do not touch. This world is a delicate creation that coudl fall apart if not properly handled. You may PM me if you have an idea you really want to try.
rampant

12-23-06, 01:47 PM		Teiza - Can we keep him pleeeeeeease?

Corre - Its my turn to hug him!

Roosevelt - Help Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!

Satnak - :rofl:

Serene - *snicker* No girls *snerk* that's the ship's carpenter *giggle* let him go! :heehee:
Charles Phipps

12-23-06, 03:02 PM		Marish: I miss when people used to cuddle me!

Ketler: Ummm Marish, you're a Lion.

Marish: Yes, but I'm warm and fuzzy.

Ketler: Warm and Fuzzy whom EATS people.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-23-06, 04:12 PM		Serene - *snicker* No girls *snerk* that's the ship's carpenter *giggle* let him go! :heehee:
Roosevelt: Yeah, this hunk of scrap would completely fall apart without me. With me there're always enough sections still standing to live in while I'm rebuilding the others.
DungeonJman

12-23-06, 04:37 PM		*rolls the box around so that it lands in an explosion site, and flies onto the Forgotten Freedom before DungeonJ gets out*

So much crazyness :twitch: :twitch :twitch: Oh and by the way Kithle.

Kithle: What the ?!?! For starters, how did you know i was there, and how is your mind still intact.

Unimportant, but the main thing is ... no wait, you just read my mind.

Kithle: That's Bahamut's avatar? How is that possible?

Look, even i don't know that, oh and by the way, if you ever do that again, or tell anyone who it is, i'll use a time smite on you.

Kithle: Time Smite?

It's a smite so powerful that it literally knocks the opponent into next week. I've done it once before on an epic warlock.

*under his breath* before he came back in time with stolen psionics and combined with 3 other guys to turn into a ESP Great Prismatic Wyrm.

*Kithle leaves, and DungeonJ makes sure he leaves*

Anyway, just curious, but since the Shadow is the actual split off malevolent shadow of Aureon, doesn't that mean that the chosen of Aureon is ... no wait, i have a pretty darn good guess.
rampant

12-23-06, 04:40 PM		Roosevelt - FREE AT LAST!! *YOINK*

Satnak - You girls have Rip and Tear anyway.

Teiza - They don't like to be hugged.

Serene - They don't like to be squeezed so hard. Just be gentle with them and understand they won't always want to play.

Satnak - Cats are strange.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-23-06, 05:16 PM		Satnak - Cats are strange.
OOcat: We like it that way. :bored:
Kaizer_Ryu

12-23-06, 06:02 PM		OOC: Anyway, just curious, but since the Shadow is the actual split off malevolent shadow of Aureon, doesn't that mean that the chosen of Aureon is ... no wait, i have a pretty darn good guess.
:plotting: Or so you think. :devil: If you want to know, PM me and I'll tell you if you're right.

IC:

Fleshweaver Tower

Elina is curled up on the bed Mordain had prepared for her. She stares at the Phylactery he gave her as his words sit heavily on her heart.

Elina: I don't know what to believe anymore...

In one way, his words made sense. She had seen the malice and cruelty the "civilized" nations were capable of. Honor was scarce and kindness was even rarer. She had known comfort amidst her family and friends on the Forgotten Freedom, but even that had been closed to her. When Mordain told her that the nature of the Promise Breaker was to release the denizens of the world from the manipulations of the Host...it just made sense.

But...she knew that much of what he accused the civilized world of was just as, if not more, true of the monster nations. She had been just as reviled when she fled to Dargunn. The Hobgoblin mercenaries had actually killed each other in an effort to claim the bounty on her head. She had fled to a temple of the Shadow, hoping that her status as his Chosen would offer some protection. Instead, the priests had tried to use her to further their own selfish goals of power. She still remembered the pain of breaking the binds they had put on her. The blood as she lost control. Yet, once she had stopped, more came in and tried to do the very same thing.

Shadow: Now you see why I need your help. Even those who claim to worship me do not follow my edicts.

Elina: I don't have an answer for you yet.

Shadow: Of this I am aware. I merely wanted to see how you were doing.

Elina: Why? Why am I the Promise Breaker?

Shadow: The title of Promise Breaker is not exclusive to you. If you do not want it, it will fall to another. You were merely deemed the most suited for the task. Ivy believed you could do it as well.

Elina: And he died because of it!

Shadow: He died defending who he believed to be the one that would set the world free. As Chosen of the Keeper, his sole desire was you. He wanted to have you, keep you safe, and protect you. Do not feel responsible for his death. He died doing what he felt was right.

Elina: ...why is Mordain being so kind?

Shadow: He is the Chosen of the Mockery. His purpose should be to guide you, but beware his words. It is part of his connection to the Mockery that he would try to twist your purpose.

Elina: He lied?!

Shadow: No. Merely mislead. My fellow diety has a somewhat...different idea as to how the breaking of the hold on humanity should come about.

Elina: ...what will happen if I agree to this?

Shadow: The Dragons fear what they cannot control. The Prophesy was deliberately changed so that you would not be seen for what the Promise Breaker is. A liberator, savior, and champion of free will. Should you accept, you will change the world. For better or worse, that is up to you...

-----

Mordain headed towards Elina's room. She had not come down for dinner, and he wondered if she had fallen into despair. He had sent Igor to fetch her, but his servant had returned saying that his presence was requested. He wondered what this was all about as his bony hand rapped on the door.

Elina: Enter.

Walking in, he noticed two things right away. The first, and most obvious, was what sat on the bed. Elina has returned to her natural form.

Mordain: Well, I assume there's an explanation for this?

Elina: Want to know?

Mordain: Do tell.

Elina: Are you sure?

Mordain: Absolutely.

Elina: It's-a-se-cret. :P

Mordain: :nonono: *sigh* Then might I inquire where you got that outfit?

The other thing he noticed was her black, sleeveless gown. It seemed the perfect combination of "bad girl", "power", and "here I am".

Elina: Oh, this is from Igor. Since I returned to normal, he felt I needed a new outfit to replace the rags I came here in.

Mordain: *shrug* He is one hell of a tailor. Come dear. Your dinner awaits.

As she walked past, he saw one last thing. This explained both her physical change and her sudden capriciousness...




On her right shoulder, partially obscured by the robes, was the mark of the Shadow.
rampant

12-23-06, 06:16 PM		Tirmek - Ollian

Ollian - How are you here?

Tirmek - Psychic projection, please be quick I can't control my body while I'm here.

Ollian - Rose?, is that you?, I sense spoonyness.

Tirmek - That would be Lily.

Lily - HEY!
Charles Phipps

12-23-06, 06:43 PM		Helm's Reach

*A Hastily constructed Fortress built by Druids using Walls of Stone and Walls of Thorns around Oalian's Grove[/i]

Lilly: Well we've been at here at Helm's Deep for the good portion of the night and it's frankly not looking so good.

Rose: No no, we're at Helm's REACH. It looks exactly like Helm's Reach and is exactly as tough, hopeless, and dark as it. Mostly because we bought the set from New Line Cinema. However, we don't have to worry about copyright.

Lilly: Okay. We've been handling the ten thousand cyborged-undead goblinoids fairly well.

Rose: Yes. I must confess that those Elf-shirts were exceptionally good at making the fight look cool.

Lilly: Plus, you managed to knock out two thousand or so by using your status as the Chosen of the Traveller.

Rose: Well, as Ghostbusters shows, by saying 'The Traveller has come!' really loud allows to summon a 200 ft. tall Marshmellow Golem once per day.

Lilly: I must confess that was probably your finest moment. It's too bad it was off camera and you're still spoony.

Rose: *sigh*

Sarah: Man, it's going to take months to eat all that frosty filling.

Tirmek: I refuse to eat any of it......unless it's in graham crackers with chocolate.

Rose: Plus, the fact that Zella revealed she actually has class levels was also helpful.

Zella: What? Was it THAT surprising I'm an Arcane Archer?

Rose: Given you've never done a damn thing in your life for yourself....yes.

Tirmek: I've called in plenty of Rakashasa favors though. The forces from the Demon Wastes will be ready to move into the Shadow Marches via gates soon enough.

Lilly: This is an improvement how?

Tirmek: The Lords of Dust are not the Daelkyr Lilly. They don't desire to destroy the world but rule it under a demonic reign. Mordain and the rest of his kind don't share power. They'll do their best to thwart his aims just like they worked against the efforts of the Dreaming Dark.

Lilly: What kind of favors did you have to call in to aid in this war?

Tirmek: I'll do what I have to do to save Elina.

Lilly: The people are looking towards me. I'm not interested in becoming a leader. I don't want to become the God's Patsy again.

Rose: There's a great deal you don't know about the gods Lilly.

Lilly: Are you going to try and say they're not out to screw us too.

Rose: Oh hell no, that's the main perk of being a goddess. Unfortunately, everyone has been playing from the assumption that the gods themselves agree upon what the Promise Breaker is....or that the Dragon Prophecy is to be trusted.

Lilly: Say what?

Rose: Dragons have 25 Intelligence or so. Do you know what that means? That means they laugh at Einstein. Do you think people that smart are going to trust the interpretation of prophecy to mortals?

Lilly: Wha...

Rose: It's bogus. The Actual Prophecies they keep locked up on Argonessan. The ones in the canons of Thrane and the Sovereign Host are made deliberately to maneuver mortals in a direction most fitting what THEY want to achieve.

Lilly: If its a prophecy why do they have to manipulate at all!

Rose: Because Prophecies by their very nature are PREDICTIONS. They make sense only in the context of facts as they might come about if critera is met. Nothing is written in stone since foreknowledge automatically changes it. The Dragons devote so much time and energy to their predictions because they want the best choice from it.

Lilly: What about my Lawful Good Red Dragon mount Sprinkles?

Tirmek: You...named...him...sprinkles?

Lilly: ...yeah, so what?

*Tirmek starts laughing as the Young Pinkish Dragon then breathes fire onto Tirmek. It resembles huge amounts of sparks shooting out like sprinkles*

Tirmek: I truly hate you Lilly.

Lilly: How do the gods fit in?

Rose: The Gods are probably trying to break the hold of the Prophecy if the Traveller is being honest with me. I don't put stock that he is by necessity. Just, they're all doing it in a different way.

Lilly: Okay...

Rose: Of course, I wouldn't want to be the one for Terra to realize that the Promise Breaker is one meant to bring freedom and self-determination back to mankind but she blew it because she wouldn't trust the DRAGON Prophecy as opposed to the divine one. Ironically, their goal all along. Mordain and others are exploting that because Elina is more malleable.

Lilly: That fiend. I have to save Elina!

Rose: I know son. It is time for you to come into your own.

*pulls out a green cap, green shirt, and brown panty hose with elf shoes*

Lilly: Uh dad.....

*Zella holds him down as he's then promptly dressed in them. Strangely, Rose has changed into the look himself*

Rose: Princess rescuing requires a very specific attire for it. I shall also have to train you in playing the pan pipe as you move, using a bow and arrow, boomerrangs, magic wands, the spinning attack slash feet, difference between blue and red potions or rings, and how to throw black powder grenades.

Zella: Don't forget to loot corpses of mispelled rubies.

Rose: Yes, and don't call them hit points. Instead, "hearts."

Lilly: Uhhh can't I just lead this army?

Rose: No, I already quoted a huge number of lines from Braveheart at them. They're psyched.

***

Five Minutes earlier

Rose: I AM ROSE GALAN! AND I SEE A WHOLE ARMY OF MY COUNTRYMEN, HERE IN DEFIANCE OF TYRANNY!

Peasant: Why does he have blue paint on?

Peasant 2: Must be a soccer fan.

Peasant: Oh, then we better cheer him.

*Everyone bangs their weapons and cheers*
ratslinky

12-23-06, 06:45 PM		Hi everyone i have just read this post from beginning to end and it is one of the funniest things i have every read. i was hoping could join the crew. Just want to make sure its ok
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

12-23-06, 06:53 PM		Peasant 2[/b]: Must be a soccer fan.

Peasant: Oh, then we better cheer him.

*Everyone bangs their weapons and cheers*

OOC: If your using a brave heart reference its called football.
Also Apart from a few place names NOTHING in that film is in any way acurate... [RantingscotishEled]
rampant

12-23-06, 06:53 PM		Go ahead its a public thread, :shifty: ...well until the mods decide to kick us out anyway.
Charles Phipps

12-23-06, 07:01 PM		OOC: If your using a brave heart reference its called football.
Also Apart from a few place names NOTHING in that film is in any way acurate... [RantingscotishEled]

I should have caught that myself actually.

Lilly: Ummm dad.

Rose: Yes son?

Lilly: Your rendition of the Life of William Wallace has some odd bits.

Rose: Oh?

Lilly: First, I doubt you invented the Pike.

Rose: If King Steve invented shoes, I can invent the Pike.

Lilly: Next, there's sort of a Bridge at Sterling...

Rose: Meh, details.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-23-06, 07:04 PM		Hi everyone i have just read this post from beginning to end and it is one of the funniest things i have every read. i was hoping could join the crew. Just want to make sure its ok
*from somewhere beyond time and space, there can be heard the chanting of "fresh meat"*

As you probably picked up, the only thing unappreciated is stepping on other people's toes (usurping character development/plots/etc). Other than that, knock yourself out. The more the merrier.

Prepare to be assimilated. :evillaugh:
Crystalforged

12-23-06, 07:04 PM		EDIT: Dang a lot of people got in while I was typing...

OOCrystalforged: Feel free. We always like to see fresh meat- er, new blood-wait, well lets just say we have no problems welcoming newcomers into our insane little fold.

Cyberman-Crystalforged: We are the cybermen. You will be upgraded.

OOCrystalforged: Quiet you. We don't want to scare the fresh meat off now do we? If you want to get involved I would suggest creating your own crew member and trying to get him involved some of the plotlines. Just remember to be gentle with other people's characters. A lot of them have invested a lot of thought into them and they have develeped fairly detailed personalities so people tend to get rather peeved when someone starts messing with them or portraying them acting in ways against their nature.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-23-06, 07:07 PM		*pulls out a green cap, green shirt, and brown panty hose with elf shoes*
OOcat: One more thing:

A handy werewolf bites Lilly.

Lilly: What the F**K was that—AUGH! I'm……changggggrrrrrrrrr!

OOcat: Okay, now we need someone small and suitably sarcastic to ride you. Plus they should have powers, but that's easy enough to find around here.

Lilly: Grrrrrrrrr!

OOcat: Don't worry. You can still rescue the princess like this. Plus she may like you more.

Silver: ;)

OOcat: I told you I don't make the decisions. :nonono:
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

12-23-06, 07:11 PM		Lilly: "And, well William Wallace ends out defeated by the english, hung-"

Rose: "No ones complained"

Lilly: "Not what it means. Then Drawn"

Rose: "I dont mind sitting for a portrait"

Lilly: "Nooo, it means they take a hook and us it to cut open your belly before drawing out your entrails, your alive for this."

Rose: *hurk* "oh..."

Lilly: "Then Quartered..."

Rose: "So there going to gut me, then give me somewhere to live?"

Lilly: "Nooo, quarterd, cut into four bits."

Rose: "I have chosen, poorly"

(OOC: Its Stirling, Sterling is a furnature store. )
Charles Phipps

12-23-06, 07:19 PM		OOC: And you mispelled complained dude.

*is hit with a claymore to the head*
luna18moon

12-23-06, 07:56 PM		Cat commentary:
Mittens: Sheesh. No thoughts on asking the cats their opinion on all of this?
Rip: Aren't she
Tear: and Sarah
Rip: supposed to be
Tear: half-celestial as well?
Shred: It's fascinating. *jumps away*
Mittens: Where do you think you're going, hmm?
Shred: Am I the only on here who enjoys the thought of being an evil empresse's cat???
Standard
Rip, Tear, and Shred are racing down a hallway, greenish chili hot on their heels.
Rip: Clear,
Tear: huh?
Shred: It chased him for a little while...
Rip and Tear::ahem:
Mittens and Nashvir are hiding on an unnaturally high shelf on the other side of the corridor.
Mittens: *jumps down* Sorry about that. I don't know why my brothers are being such jerks. Hey, you want to meet some of the more freakish kittens on board?
Nashvir: ;) Sure.
Mittens: :blush:
Later:
Rip, Tear, and Shred are panting in a tucked-away corner.
Shred: Thank the gods it went after the redshirts.
Rip: This isn't
Tear: helping.
Both: They're still falling in love!
Shred: We're going to need some help on this.
rampant

12-23-06, 08:06 PM		Mittens - Oiy over here!

Nashvir - Who or what is that?

Dorvos - Hmmmm

Mittens - *hops up onto Dorvos's head* Purrr ( this is mine )

Nashvir - meow (your what?)

Dorvos - Hmmmmm

Mittens - mew ( I'm not sure yet, I haven't finished training him, and he has a lot of tricks already, fetch, scratch my ears, feed me, bringeth me catnip, flicky tail, music, comb my fur, nap spot, don't drop me, wake up )
Kaizer_Ryu

12-23-06, 08:22 PM		OOC: :heehee rampant, you get the :king: award for most perfect depiction of a cat's point of view EVER!

IC:

She had been searching for Elina for the last two days. Lisa was still bed ridden, but they both knew Terra's place was finding their daughter. Though she had disbanded her formal spy network along with her empire, the animals of Eberron were still her allies. Terra flew towards Fleshweaver Tower as fast as she could, knowing that this is where she would find her.

As the tower appeared, she came to a stop. Something...familiar was in the air. She continued slowly, till she found the source of the presence. A barrier. It gave off the same feeling Ivy had that night.

Terra: So, Achika, you're here too?

Backing up a little, she launches a concentrated ball of pure magical energy at it. It fizzles on contact, then the barrier counters with a blast of eldrich power. She barely manages to dodge before smiling to herself.

Terra: Seems she's hell bent on keeping me out. This is specifically designed with me in mind.

She could see plainly that travel through the Plane of Shadow was not an option either. This barrier was multidimensional. The strange thing was, it only seemed to block her magical signature.

Terra: Makes sense, I guess. They need to get in and out without letting threats in.

In a strange way, she felt honored to have such care taken to prevent her from interfering. This meant that she was considered a threat more potent than the rest of the crew. Considering that her daughter was at stake, not really an inaccurate assumption. In a booming voice, she announces her opinion of this turn of events.

Terra: Hear me, Tiamat! I will have my daugter back if I have to tear apart the fabric of space and time! And you know I can do that! Return her to me, unless you wish to experience the pain that the fool who comes between a mother grzzly and her cub does!

Little happens for a moment, before a set of large doors open up in the ground. From the hole erupts an armored Dracolich that flies up towards her. It is followed by a dozen more.

Terra: :smirk: So that's how it's going to be, huh?

A ball of mystcal light surrounds her. The first of the Dracoliches arrives at the ball and readies to bite down. In an instant, the ball dispels and the undead dragon explodes in a hail of powdered bone. Where the ball was, Terra floats in her transformed state, complete with claws, tentacles, and all the glowy you can imagine.

Terra: BRING IT ON!

-----

*Inside Fleshweaver Tower*

One of the Phylactery's that held the Dracoliches souls explodes at the same time it's owner does.

Achika: *raised eyebrow* Impressive, young goddess. Too bad you're doing exactly what I was hoping you would. As you waste your time on a futile effort, Mordain's forces decimate the countryside. Time is not on your side in this. You will have your daughter back, my dear, but I wonder...will you still know who she is? :smirk:

A second Phylactery melts, implodes, explodes, and disintegrates simultaneously.
urial angel of death

12-23-06, 08:34 PM		OOC: There is a past thing I will be wanting to do with Elina(as in before the promise-breaker), but first Kaizer how low brow of humor are you allowing for her. Nothing would happen, but it would take every possible inuindue(sp) I can think of to pull off.

IC: Clarice stood in a now empty realm of dreams. She was staring off into the distant multi-colored sunset. Tears are streaming down her face.

13: *appearing* Package for you miss. Please sign here.

Clarice signed a name that was different than Clarice Watley. It started with "Fal" and ended with a "phet". She pulled a large silver colored crown and bow made from pure white wood from the box.

Clarice: Any arrows.

13: No

Clarice: Excellent!

Clarice placed that crown on her head. It immediately finished the oxidization process it had begun the instant she first touched it, turning into a sickly black-green color. Then she strapped the bow to her back.

Clarice: It is time.
----------

Cain and Abel are walking down a path, though one of the few areas not touched by the FF.

Cain: I can't believe brother would choose some stupid little girl over us!

Abel: Well we haven't been around very often so-

13: Package for both of you.

Cain and Abel both sign very short names that start with "W" and "S".

Cain pulls out a sword that was obviously designed to be poked into moving squishy things to make them stop moving. Abel on the other hand recieves a small set of scales.

Abel: Grandpa's getting a bit heavy handed in his old age.

-------

Volrath is back in his room holding a scythe he had just signed for with a five letter word that starts with "D".
Kaizer_Ryu

12-23-06, 08:46 PM		OOC: There is a past thing I will be wanting to do with Elina(as in before the promise-breaker), but first Kaizer how low brow of humor are you allowing for her. Nothing would happen, but it would take every possible inuindue(sp) I can think of to pull off.
So long as nothing bad happens, and it wouldn't get you or anyone else in trouble, go for it. Just be prepared for my avatar to be screaming bloody murder. I set the "pervert smashing" parameters a little too high.

:shifty:

:shifty:

It's spelled innuendo.
rampant

12-23-06, 09:15 PM		Tirmek - These creatures are undead correct?

Cyborg Zombie Hoboblin - Braaainnss

Tirmek - I'm going to take that as a yes. Ok then I envoke the right of Action Point for an RPG Moment!

Lily - Huh?

Rose - What are you doing?

Tirmek - Shut up spoony, Spoony Jr. transform!

Lily - Hey WTF!? (turns into his angelic form)

Tirmek - DUAL TECH!

Lily - SACRED SHOCK WAVE!

Tirmek Leaps upon the flat of Lily's blade and is flipped over the entire horde.

Tirmek and Lily Both charge for the center Tirmek focusing his power to his fists while Lily creates a massive wave of positive energy before him.

When they clash in the middle Tirmek unleashes a tornado of energized punches upon Lily's wave. The resulting Positive energy shockwaves swamp the feild in white fire. Destroying Undead and re-invigorating the living.

Lily - I feel used :(
urial angel of death

12-23-06, 09:28 PM		Elina is merrily skipping through the library and running her hand along the shelves.

Kerrith: If you keep doing that you're gonna get a splinter.

Elina: Oh stop being so- ow! I got a splinter. :weep:

Kerrith: Told you.

Elina: I'm already hurting, you don't have to be mean. :mad:

Kerrith: I didn't intend to. It's just that the library isn't sanded well and if you hang around here you are going to get some massive splinters. Not touching the bookselves helps minimize it.

Outside of the library Lisa is walking, and due to thin walls can hear what is being said in the library. This is what she hears.

Elina: Ouch I've never had one that big in me.

Kerrith: Oh don't worry I'll pull it out.

Elina: O great now I'm bleeding and- Ow! It still hurts. :weep:

Kerrith: I'll get a towel to soak up the blood. You'll get used to it after a few times.

Elina: Thanks.

Kerrith: No problem *walks out of library**looks down and realizing it was down, zips his fly*

Lisa: :headexplo

Hammer smashing of epic proportions begins.
Charles Phipps

12-23-06, 09:37 PM		Zella: By the way, how did you get Lilly out of his funk?

Rose: Oh. We used extreme measures. Evange-therapy.

***

Lilly: *in plug suit* I'm weak. I'm a coward.

Sarah: *Dressed like Asuka* What are you STUPID! You're the only one who can save the world.

Tirmek: I believe in you Lilly *gets disgusted look* Why couldn't I have been Asuka?

Lilly: More to the point, why the HELL are you identical to Rei?

Tirmek: Shapeshifter. Duh.

Lilly: You've ruined Evangelion for me.

Ketler: *As Gendo* Not me! Give me a hug Rei!

***

Zella: Is that why Tirmek is shivering off to the side?

Rose: Yes. Most likely. In general, it worked to get Lilly back to being his noble and heroic self.

Zella: Have you scene Terra?

Rose: I imagine she's trying to break through Khyber's psychic barriers on Elina's mind. Then, knowing my wife, Achika is going to reveal to Terra the truth of the Prophecy and what Terra has missed by her passing the torch. Then....Terra will be clunked out.

Zella: You don't think she'll be able to break through?

Rose: I love my sister but she's unable to comprehend the subtleties of the universe. She reacts on emotions more than logic.

Zella: If you're so smart why aren't you a God?

Rose: What? Are you STUPID? Who the Hell wants that much WORK? I'm quite fine with my Elfmanity thank you very much.

Zella: That's true. So how is Lilly doing with his handling of taking out Mordain?

Rose: Well, he could be doing better.

*A bunch of Dog faces Bugbears with spears chase Lilly left and right as their spears regenerate everytime they throw them*

Rose: I do think that we're going to need to fast forward through some of this plot arc though.

Zella: Won't that endanger all of the Eldeen Reaches people?

Rose: Nah, I sent a Fedex to Frostfell for DungeonJman to rescue them at the last minute. Let's hope that theres not a Dol Dornmas pileup or everyone in the Reaches will die.

Zella: Noted. So how are we speeding up this?

Rose: Montage.

Zella: *claps hands* Splendid!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Js0c69cTDk8

***

Dungeon 1

*Sarah in Princess outfit throwing bombs accompanies Link-Lilly as he wields his sword against a gigantic unicorn headed dragon*

Sarah: Damnit! This only the first Dungeon!

Link: It's my Unicorn! He's learned Polymorph Self and BOY is he ticked!

***

Dungeon 2

Link Lilly: Ah ha! My evil Dark Twin that is the last of the Palace Demons to face!

Dark Lilly: My outfit is red and thus cooler than you! Also, who wants sidescroll action in a Zella game?

Link lilly: Shut up and fight! Despite my agreeing with you!

***

Dungeon 3

Link Lilly: Okay, who the HELL turned me into a big fluffy pink bunny rabbit?

Tirmek: *Points and Nelson laughs* HA HA!

***

Dungeon 4

Link Lilly: Weird, I feel....Gameboyish.

Rose: Yes, be grateful. I once had to do this in Black and White.

***

Dungeon 5

Link Lilly: OW! Why the hell did you slap me!?

Sarah; *In shieka outfit* You're on a mission to Rescue Elina! How could you do that with that rancher's daughter and the forest girl!

Link Lilly: HEROES HAVE NEEDS!

***

Dungeon 6

Link Lilly: So my enemy is a Big Giant Mask.

Majora: I'm Scary!

Link Lilly: SUREEeeee you are.

***

Dungeon 7

Lilly Link: How do I get all these damned swords together. Where's the instruction manual! DAMNIT!

Rose: Look, you're never going to get it right. Just put it away.

Lilly Link: HUSH YOU!

***

Dungeon 8

Sarah: BADASS! I'm a Pirate Lass now.

Lilly Link: You weren't before? And I don't care how cool all this sailing action is. The art is still pretty childish.

Rose: Is it just me or was Mordain packing on the pounds?

Lilly Link: Well he's been a PIG in previous dungeons. It's an improvement. Oh well, at least the adventure ended with the saving of the kingdom.

Rose: Actually, you guaranteed it would stay sunk.

Lilly Link: Oh. Whoops.

***

Dungeon 9

Red Lilly Link: Hello!

Blue Lilly Link: Hello!

Green Lilly Link: Hello!

Purple Lilly Link: Hello!

Sarah: Four Lillies! My worst nightmare!

***

Dungeon 10

Lilly Link: So I put this cap on and it shrinks me?

rose: Yes.

*Lilly throws away the cap*

***

Dungeon 11
Fleshweaver Tower

Lilly: *pants pants pants* Finally here!

*Lilly uncontrollably scratches behind his ears with his leg*

Sarah: Minda is cooler than Zelda.

Lilly: BLASPHEMER!

Rose: So how do we enter the tower?

Zella: Well we have all the Maguffin stones. It should magically open for us.

Lilly: Errr...I sort of broke those in Dungeon 3.

Rose: WHAT!?

Lilly: They had hot girls in them!

*Igor opens the door*

Igor: Oh hello. Come on in.
rampant

12-23-06, 09:57 PM		Tirmek - Hi Igor!

Igor - Goodluck Watch out for the trapped stairs.

Lily - Whats with him?

Tirmek - Allways be nice to the tailors, they know EVERYTHING!

Lily - Okaaaay (takes two steps back) Dad I don't think Tirmek's quite recovered from Ketler Ikari.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-23-06, 10:00 PM		OOUrial: *twitching on the ground* Ow...

OOKazier: :twitch:

OOC: Told you.

-----

*upon seeing the montage*

OOKaizer: :blink:

OOCrystalforged: *clutching his trophy* Oh, no you don't! This is mine!

OOC: BTW, of course Terra would be acting on emotions. :P She hasn't seen her daughter since Ivy brought her to -500 HP and declared his intention to 'claim' Elina as his bride. Wouldn't you be more than a little upset if you knew your child was in the hands of a great evil and being used as a pawn in a cosmic war? ;)

That, and she feels INCREDIBLY guilty about putting Elina in this position.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-23-06, 10:11 PM		Rose: What? Are you STUPID? Who the Hell wants that much WORK?……
Bunny: It's got some perks.

Silver: It helps if you enjoy telling the laws of reality to sit down and shut up.

13: I chose this. Admitedly, because of the Principle of Non-Existance Retroactivity, that didn't happen.
*******
@Urial: Good Omens. Although I get the feeling the "Fal", "phet", and "S" are different from anything in the book.

@luna: Who's Nashvir?
urial angel of death

12-23-06, 10:29 PM		@Urial: Good Omens. Although I get the feeling the "Fal", "phet", and "S" are different from anything in the book.


OOC: Great book. I just like to fool around with them and change them to my interpretations of the "entities".

Oh yes and a :lop: plushy to you
ratslinky

12-23-06, 10:58 PM		Okay, my character is going to be a half-fiend/changling wizard 4 and his alter ego is a diviner 5 named Gaz for male personality and Esabar for female he/she is 10.

Born with two minds, one of a male changling and one of a female half fiend. He/she never had one single gender, instead it changed every couple of days depending on which ego was dominant. By the age of two there was a full scale war going on in his/her mind but eventuly his/her changling mind won out thru diplomacy, convincing the fiendish side that it was better to help people. His birth had been planned. He was meant to be a leiutenant in the army of darkness that Elina was supposed to lead but he refused to be a pawn to anyone and broke free from his destiny. further more, by convincing the fiend to be good he stopped any chance of the cycle being repeated. Now that the fiend and he where working together he found out that she was a skilled wizard and diviner. From her he learnt magic and slowly they became good friends. He now trusts her with his life. Recenlty, in her divining, she has seen that Elina is going to her destiny and she has told him to help her and her friends in anyway he can. He prefers not to kill people when he can and instead uses his silver tongue and charm spells where possible but has no quaums about killing when he has to.

Note: i may change the wizard to beguiler if i get PHB 2 for christmas
Crystalforged

12-23-06, 10:59 PM		:twitch: Relatives at house for christmas.

:twitch: So many relatives.

:twitch: So many little kids.

:twitch: Slowly driving me insane.

...

:bored: Alright more insane.

:twitch: Maybe driving back to sanity.

:twitch: Homicidal urges rising.



EDIT: THERE IS A DANCING SANTA DOLL SINGING "EVERYBODY DANCE NOW" IN A FEMALE VOICE AND SAYING SOMETHING ABOUT "DO YOU THINK I"M SEXY."
Paulon

12-23-06, 11:40 PM		Okay, my character is going to be a half-fiend/changling wizard 4 and his alter ego is a diviner 5.

So, what's his name?
Charles Phipps

12-23-06, 11:45 PM		Two-Face.

;-)
Charles Phipps

12-23-06, 11:59 PM		*In a vast empty square room with three pyramids forming a triangle as a mural on the floor*

Mordain: At last, you are now once and for all in my clutches.

Lilly: Oh please, like we're scared of a Lich!

*Mordain then slowly transforms as the monstrous thing expands to nearly twenty feet in height, black wings expand from his back, as his undead and horrific flesh reaks of toxic fumes while a giant trident appears in his hands. His face becomes pig like and monstrous*

Lilly: You know.....Ganon isn't NEARLY as scary when done by Nintendo.

Rose: They made the blood green in Mortal Kombat.

Mordain: NOW TO SHOW YOU MY TRUE FORM!

Lilly: That's Dracula's line from Castlevania! Don't you steal!

Rose: It's also after we defeat the human form but BEFORE the transformation.

Mordain: Oh shut up! This is worse than when I was downgraded to being the first Fiend in the original Final Fantasy.

Lilly: Hold on...HOW THE HELL CAN HE BE AN UNDEAD BALOR WITH PC LEVELS? That's two templates!

Mordain: Eldritch Machine.

Lilly: Damn that Keith Baker and his deus es machine rules breaking devices!

Rose: Go rescue Elina Lilly. I'm going to deal with the monster here.

Lilly: With all due respect dad, you're a bard.

Rose: A Bard with a +12 Rapier!

*Pulls out the Master Sword*

Lilly: THE MASTER SWORD IS NOT A RAPIER!

Mordain: Trust me, do you think I want to advertise I've been beaten by a Bard all this time?

Lilly: Hold on, I just went through Hell and you think you can just tell me to avoid the Final Boss? HELL...

Rose: You know you resist Bluff and Diplomacy checks with your Wisdom right?

Lilly:.....ah crap.

*walks off and heads to rescue Elina*

Zella: Hold on! I'm sick of this penny ante crap too! There's no way that I'm letting Ganondorf...

Mordain: Mordain.

Zella: Get away with it again! I'm going to fight him too!

Mordain: Oh please. I won't kidnap you anyway. You're too old now!

Zella: *pause*

Mordain: AHHHHHHHH! +12 Bolt of Undead-Demon Hybrid slaying! How does that even exist!?

Rose: Wow, his voice gets really high in pig form. He sounds exactly like he did in the cartoon

Zella: You must help me Link!

Rose: Excusseeeeeee me Princess!

Sarah: That last line makes me want to not help you.

*A giant fire elemental bat comes to attack Sarah*

Sarah: meep!

*Mordain leaps up and down as portions of his floor fall away to seeming bottomless pit*

Tirmek: *falls* NOOOOO! SARAHHHHHHHHHH!

Sarah: TIRMEK! NOOOOOOOOOO! *wipes away tears and growls* You'll PAY FOR THAT MORDAIN!

Zella: *whisper* You think we should tell her that it just leads to the next floor below and he'll be able to get back in almost immediately?

Rose: Nah. Let her enjoy the brief roleplaying combat bonus.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P5a9vCh3fDg

Rose: *watches video* Good Lord, that guy is geekier than you.

Zella: Hush, his true love of fandom shines through and it's only background music.

Mordain: Very geeky...

Zella: ATTACK OF OPPORTUNITY!

Rose: ATTACK OF OPPORTUNITY!

THE GREAT BATTLE BEGINS!
Kaizer_Ryu

12-24-06, 12:39 AM		OOC: :weep: I feel...so inadequate in my fandom... :weep:

IC:

As the EPIC battle rages inside, Terra comes face to face with an old friend and a hated enemy.

Terra: It's about time you showed up.

Achika: I commend you for defeating each of my pets. Destroying their Phylactery's from afar was an especially nice touch.

Terra: :mad: Where is my daughter!

Achika: :devil: You seem upset. Would it help if you knew we have been taking great care of her? She has been able to sleep without fear, eat her fill, and enjoy peace for the first time in almost a week.

Terra: *through clenched teeth* It was your fault she went through all that in the first place!

Achika: The way I see it, she is the one who chose to run. And, going even further back, you were the one who put her in this position in the first place.

Terra: Not on purpose!

Achika: :smirk: ...would you like to know what I find the most amusing about all this?

Terra: I fail to find any of this amusing. I WANT MY DAUGHTER!

Achika: *ignoring her* By your defiance of the Shadow, you lost the opportunity to do what you always dreamed of.

Terra: ...what do you mean?

Achika: The Promise Breaker is not an inherently evil title. It is merely the name given to the one who will forever break the Prophesy. By denying your fate, you did the very thing the Dragons wanted you to do.

Terra: ...

Achika: Isn't it funny, Terra? *chuckles* It is, isn't it? :devil: :evillaugh

Achika throws her head back in maniacal laughter as Terra shakes with rage. Then, Terra sees hope for her child. Even if Elina had chosen to bear that responsibility, nothing really said she had to do as the Prophesy fortold. In fact, what was prophesized would be EXACTLY what the Dragons would want people to think in order to avoid that future.

Terra: Why are you telling me this?

Achika: Consider it for old time's sake. Now hurry along. Elina is waiting for you...

With this, both she and the barrier disappear. Terra immediately searches for Elina's presence and goes straight for it.
ratslinky

12-24-06, 12:45 AM		OOC: I'm not telling you what his name is it's a secret :P

OORatslinky: You just can't think of a name can you?

OOC: No :weep:
rampant

12-24-06, 12:57 AM		A floor or three down

Tirmek - According to my knowledge of architectural structure and energitics, She would have had to come through this room at least once given the layout of the building so far. Got her scent! ('path to Sarah) I've got her scent! Follow my signature!

Sarah - (path back) Tirmek You're alright!?

Tirmek - (path) You should know by now, Catfall.

Sarah - (path back) *anime sweatdrop*

Tirmek - (you get the picture) STILL!

Sarah - (do I even need to say it) I figured I'd be getting my wings soon and Body Adjustment is so useful.
Charles Phipps

12-24-06, 01:01 AM		*The EPIC Battle continues*

*Rose performs three Great Cleaves in a row as he uses his bardic magic to Haste himself brutally*

*Zella leaps up into the air and throws a Boomerang larger than she is made of Demonsbane Silver against the side of the monster*

*Mordain is covered in well over a dozen enspelled arrows and countless sword blows but seems little worse for wear*

*Sarah and Tirmek lie on the ground hovering at death's door thanks to the damage inflicted by the demon*

Rose: Damnit! How many Hit Points does this guy have!?

Zella: Hearts dear.

Rose: He's a boss. He can have hit points.

Mordain: Muhahahahaha! FOOLISH LINK AND ZELDA!

Rose: Ahem.

Mordain: *still in cartoon Ganon voice* Rose and Zella. I HAVE ULTIMATE POWER!

Rose: You're a ninja!

Tirmek: Hovering at Death's door here!

Sarah: Don't we regenerate?

Tirmek: Ummm...nevermind.

Mordain: Nothing can stop me now! Once I wield the ultimate power of the TRI-FLAME!

Tirmek: They're not even trying with this rip off now!

Rose: You'll never win Gano...err Mordain! *fires his Wand of Fireballs at him until spell points are expended then switches to Wand of Ice*

*Rose is knocked over the side by a flaming trident before latching on with a chain like whip that throws him back over*

Mordain: Damnit, those were supposed to only be used in Wind Walker. MUHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAHA!

Sarah: Chaotic Evil Demonhood doesn't suit Mordain.

Zella: Oh woe! Even our red rings that reduce damage to one quarter and our frequent downing of healing potion has not given enough strength to oppose Ganond...err Mordain!

Mordain: Hey, I've been generous! I've been using freaking melee combat and circles of easily understandable patterns of fire elemental bats to attack rather than hordes of spells. I shouldn't be making this so easy!

*Rose and Zella are on one half-heart each*

Rose: Must...summon...every last ounce of my strength left....for one last attack.

Zella: Yes.....with this...SILVER ARROW I have, we can defeat Ganondo....MORDAIN damnit!

*Mordain knows fear for the first time*

Mordain: I SHALL KILL YOU FIRS....

*An air mail drop via Fedex of DungeonJman lands on Mordain fleshweaver's head, the paladin's blessed silver armor killing the monster instantly*

Rose and Zella: :twitch:

DungeonJman: HEY! I DEFEATED THE EVIL MONSTER!

Rose and Zella: :twitch:

DungeonJman: Something wrong?

***

OOC: A final bit of honoring here!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y4FwWwzcBoE&mode=related&search=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UVBMI1SjZU4&mode=related&search=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1CXSQUfh3gU&mode=related&search=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jQM2_AzBvDY&mode=related&search=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r0tr8ybSqgg&mode=related&search=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXN1BF65WjI

OOC2: Oops, didn't see Tirmek and Sarah weren't in the fight.
ratslinky

12-24-06, 01:51 AM		Okay doing the bits in my char info that i missed he is ten and for now his name is Gaz for male personality and Esabar for female personality.
ratslinky

12-24-06, 02:11 AM		Dungeon 1

Esabar: Hey look not all of Lilly's unicorn got unpolymorphed

Gaz: Ugh you're disgusting :yuck:

***

Dungeon 2

Gaz: lucky he was whereing red I woulnd't be able to where this gear if it wasn't it would have looked awful

Esabar: Put that robe back on the corpse Gaz show respect for the dead

***

Dungeon 3
Gaz: Hey look i'm a Black bunny I wonder if this stays on outside this dungeon i can scare lilly :schemes:

***

Dungeon 4

*Nothing to say*

***

Dungeon 5

Esabar: no you can't do that I don't care if you agree with lilly on this

Gaz: aww :weep:

***

OOratslinky: Can't think of anything to more to say
rampant

12-24-06, 02:22 AM		Angel of Mist and Stone waits in a room between Tirmek and the continuation of the trail of Elina's scent.

Aomas - So close yet so far Knightmare Prince.

Tirmek - So many idiots, did those creeps at the top ever tell you what happened to your previous incarnation, Fate? or to Verashis?

Aomas - The 76th Incarnation, of the Angel of Fate was weakened in battle with the Sage of Legacy. As it's power decayed I was forged. Verashis has dissapeared and is still alive somewhere because all attempts to forge his next incarnation have failed.

Tirmek - (path to sarah) slink past him, he's no threat to you

A gaping hole appears int the Angel's stone torso.

Sarah - Too late:D

Tirmek - Why do I even bother?

Aomas - guhk You are not part of the path.

Tirmek - Fate is crumbling here, you need to stop relying on your "absolute Ideals" and actually pay attencion to the world around you.

Aomas - You cannot kill me.
----------------------------------------------

Dashing down the corridors

Tirmek - Angels from the homeplane are hard to affect with illusions, but they mistake that for immunity. As long as he doesn't realize he's not actually hurt we're golden.

Sarah - Forged? Incarnations?

Tirmek - Angels are the remnants of the first empires. They have access to some serious regeneration tech. They can rebuild one of their own that has died or is dying restoring its essence in a new body and mind. They have used it so long they believe they are forces of the cosmic order, immortal, and absolute.

Sarah - Are they?

Tirmek - That is the current angel of fate, he is trying to force me to become the knightmare prince. He belives it to be his duty as the master of destiny.

Sarah - ARE THEY!?

Tirmek - I don't know.
Charles Phipps

12-24-06, 02:23 AM		OOC: hehe, nice comments.
ratslinky

12-24-06, 02:28 AM		OORatslinky: here is a :gift: for charles and here's one for kaizer :gift: and one for silver :gift: and some for anyone i have missed :gift: :gift: :gift: :gift: :gift: :gift: :gift: :gift:
Kaizer_Ryu

12-24-06, 03:11 AM		After complimenting Igor on his handiwork, Lilly had convinced him to show him the way to Elina. After a few wrong turns, dead ends, and Deku Baba's spitting seeds at him, he finally reaches her room.

Lilly: *knocking* Elina! Are you in there?!

Elina: Leave me alone!

Opening the door, he sees her poised to attack. Her dual mindblades at the ready and a look of anger on her face.

Lilly: Elina...I'm not going to hurt you. I give you my word, it was never my intention to hurt you.

Elina: What about Ivy? Did you intend to kill him?

Lilly: No! I only meant to wound him! I just acted!

Elina: And will you do the same to me? Your word means nothing.

Lilly: I...

Elina: You're still the little boy playing hero. You still think there is something worth defending. How droll.

Lilly: How can you say that?!

Elina: Do you have any idea what I've been through?! Have you seen the lengths the citizens of this world are willing to go to to kill a scared and confused little girl merely because a scrap of paper says she might do something bad later?!

Lilly: Not everyone is like that! I...we would never do that to you. I've been looking for you ever since you disappeared. I've been worried sick about you! Were you ok? We're you scared? Lonely? Hungry? Cold? Were you even still you? When I found out you were here, I came as fast as I could to save you!

Elina: *amused* Save me? From what?

Lilly: :confused:

Elina: Other than Aunt Lilly, Mordain was the only one to show me any kindness as well as give me a place to rest. Unfortunately, *holds up the broken remains of his Phylactery* he is no longer with us. No doubt due to your efforts.

Lilly: He was a horrid, evil monster. He's been sending out legions of monsters to kill, pillage and destroy. I don't know what he's been telling you, but he was nothing but a liar.

Elina: Deception and lies are two different things. There were things he told me that I knew to be deceptions, but he told me many truths about what it means to be the Promise Breaker.

Lilly: You aren't going to destroy the world. That's just what the Dragons want every one to think.

Elina: This I know. The duty of the Promise Breaker is to free the mortal races from the shackles placed on them by the Prophesy. How that is done is up to the one who bears the title.

Lilly: You wouldn't have to do it by yourself. We...no, I would never allow it.

Elina: *humph* Big promises from someone so small.

At this time, the shadows rise up and encircle Elina. They quickly form into the body of her mother, holding her tightly.

Terra: *deathgrip hug* :weep: My baby. Oh, my baby...you're ok... :weep: *kisses her forehead* :weep: I've missed you so much... Oh, I'm so happy you're safe... :weep:

Elina: *currently being smothered* Mmmmph hmmm mrrrrphhh.

She shot Lilly one last look of contempt before returning her mother's hug. She would return to the FF with a new title: The Promise Breaker. No tears escaped her. She had had her fill of crying lately...

OOC: Ok, just to make things clear. Kitsune is back. Yes, still as the Shadow in disguise. Elina has not fallen, she's just p*ssed at the world. She believes that the Shadow is not truly evil and that being the Promise Breaker is her opportunity to do some profound good and prove everyone wrong.
rampant

12-24-06, 03:14 AM		Kithle - Hello pholly such delightfully cool weather we're having.

Pholly - :twitch: You like warm weather! What are you planning!!!

Kithle - Why I have no idea what you could possibly mean.
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Serene - No Teiza mistletoe doesn't mean shoot a rocket at granpa's feet. I don't care what Cole said.

Teiza - (holding a smoking bazooka tube) :confused:

Rip - mew ( that just means more ammo to use on that creep that keeps hanging around mittens )
ratslinky

12-24-06, 05:31 AM		Gaz's to the scene of Terra hugging Elina with Lilly loking on.

Gaz: What i came all this way and everythings finished this sucks.

*He kicks a rock out the window it sails out over the tower and hits a Dolgaunt wizard. Who has almost finished summoning his daelkar master. The rock hit him just as he got to the last word. So it cam out as ftagghhh instead of ftagn. Nalfien appear in a puff of smoke saying ftagn you I***t not ftagghhh with that he fireballs the dolgaunt and leaves the dolgaunt dies*
DungeonJman

12-24-06, 07:58 AM		What the ???

Oh well, that's a relief, now that she's not inherently evil, i don't have to use the stupid sealing ritual, even though her breaking the prophecy means... :eek: oh wow, i just figured out what the prophecy is. We are so dead.

Wait a minute, I was right about the Shadow being in her mind the entire time!

(For the record, despite what you guys have said, breaking the prophecy may be a bad thing, considering that when the two forces of Khyber and Siberys were evenly matched, and Eberron stopped both of them, the prophecy was kept. It may not be for good or evil, but I don't think breaking it is a good thing.)
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-24-06, 08:39 AM		OOC: Hey, we could have Elina go with Kitten to see Caralot's Eberron. Show her what a universe is like when people are prejudiced against their neighbors rather than people they've never seen.

13: It's the same thing.

OOC: I TOLD YOU NEVER TO INTERRUPT ME IN OOC MODE!

13: :P Cool yourself. I just came here to say that I thought the Ocarina of Time Ganon was wickedly cool. Not his human form, that doesnt get cool until he grows facial hair.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-24-06, 08:40 AM		(For the record, despite what you guys have said, breaking the prophecy may be a bad thing, considering that when the two forces of Khyber and Siberys were evenly matched, and Eberron stopped both of them, the prophecy was kept. It may not be for good or evil, but I don't think breaking it is a good thing.)
OOC: I still don't see how this makes not breaking it a good thing. Anything that attempts to dictate peoples' lives to them is a bad thing.
DungeonJman

12-24-06, 08:44 AM		It only appears to dictate peoples lives, it really is...

*is hit over the head by Achika, before falling onto the ground*

Achika: No giving away possible ways to thwart my plans!
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-24-06, 09:06 AM		OOC: If you remember, in Caralot's dimension Khyber was able to break apart the prophecy, thus freeing Eberron from being a world full of things trying to kill you. Instead, it's a world full of things trying to annoy you.

OOcat: No giving away secrets!

OOC: What secrets? :shifty:
DungeonJman

12-24-06, 09:11 AM		*wakes up*

No, but it works differently in this universe, and most of the other ones, if the Prophecy is destroyed, then..

*gets hit over the head again, but is just stopped, not knocked over*

Achika: Stop it!

Never! And i now know why Siberys tried to stop you, those many years ago. However, I would like to know why you tried to destroy all of existence. Actually, i already know, since you are the original Promise Breaker.
rampant

12-24-06, 11:07 AM		Tirmek and Sarah - Elina! Elina!

Tirmek - Are you Ok?

Sarah - Are you hurt?

Terra - Your momma and I were so worried!

Elina - (i.h.h. who do I have to kill to get in a word edgewise around here)
Kaizer_Ryu

12-24-06, 11:26 AM		OOC: Technically, the Shadow was not in her head. The Spirit Guide does not possess or in any way inhabit the body of the Spirit Shaman. It is merely their conduit to the realm of spirits. It is their equivalent of a familiar. A connected, but entirely separate entity.

IC:

*Back on the FF*

Sarah: Um...Mom?

Terra: *sniff* Yes, dear?

Sarah: I don't think she can breathe.

Terra: Oh!

Elina: *gasp* *wheeze*

Terra: *anime sweatdrop* Sorry...

Elina: :rolleyes: Mmhpr...

Sarah: That goes for you too, Momma.

Lisa: :weep: I'm never letting go again... :weep:

*after much mushy and joyful hugging, kissing, and reminders to allow breathing...Lisa still refuses to let go, but is merely hanging on*

Elina: I'm sorry I worried you...

Lisa: It's not your fault...that wasn't the best night ever...

Elina: It's just...I saw you hurt so badly. *shakes her head* I couldn't do anything to stop it or help you. I tried...I really, really tried. It just wasn't good enough.

Lisa: Don't ever think like that. You saved my life. You stablized me enough for help to arrive...

Elina: ...

Sarah: Sis...

Elina: *sigh* No...I'm ok. It's just...so much has happened.

Sarah: Sis...Lilly really was worried about you. He blames himself for what happened to you.

Elina: So?

Sarah: Sis! How can you be so cold?!

Elina: How can you forgive him so easily?!

Terra: Because he has not forgotten Ivy.

Lisa: Ivy was not slain out of malice or bloodlust. Lilly was beside himself afterwards.

Elina: *humph*

Terra: He never once believed that you would do any of the terrible things the Prophesy said you would. His primary concern was finding you before you were overcome, either by dispair or your pursuers.

Lisa: If nothing else, give him a chance to prove his sincerity.

Elina: ...fine.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-24-06, 11:46 AM		Elina: *humph*
…………
Elina: ...fine.
Bunny (wearing an Elina mask): Oooo, woe is me, I've become all emo because the world hates me and wants me dead. (throws away the mask) You live on the freakin' club for that.

Silver: Don't forget she's got a possibly evil entity as her best friend.

OOcat: And having three crazy non-existant gods is any better? :bored:

Silver: :D

13: Well, one of her friends did die trying to defend her.

Bunny: :pbbbtt: Just go on some rediculously complicated quest to revive him.

13 (hopping up and down): Canwecanwecanwe? :D

OOcat: I think Kaizer has his own ideas about how that should go. Besides, I now have the Light Warrior and Kitten Meets Her Grandparents plotline to do. I'm too lazy for this!
DungeonJman

12-24-06, 12:04 PM		*his voice and appearance changes slightly in order to reflect him now speaking for the sake of absolute justice with a hint of moral justice, instead of the other way around*

Despite your involvement, the Probability Guarder will still stop the Breaker as it has been foretold, as his predecessor, Siberys, so that existance shall remain intact.

Zella: Probability Guarder ???

The one, that Dol Arrah has chosen, who is fulfilling the function of being the opposite to the Probability Breaker, in accordance with the Third Law of Physics: That an action shall have an equal and opposite reaction, where the first action was brought into existance by a combination of choice and probability.

Zella: But what does this have to do with the prophecy?

The prophecy is the function of probability, which on this world is visible to mortal minds as draconic lettering.
rampant

12-24-06, 12:07 PM		Kithle - Happy Dol Dornmas eve pholly!

Pholly - YOU"RE NOT GONNA GET AWAY WITH IT THIS TIME! I"M WATCHING YOU 24/7 UNTIL I FIGURE OUT YOUR GAME!

Kithle - Realy?

Pholly - YES REALLY!!

-----------------------------

Pholly - There are some things we are not meant to know.

13 - :D You really should have known not to spy on him in there.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-24-06, 12:12 PM		OOcat: I think Kaizer has his own ideas about how that should go. Besides, I now have the Light Warrior and Kitten Meets Her Grandparents plotline to do. I'm too lazy for this!
Silver: :D Oh, you bet he does.

Bunny: I never like that look...

13: Does this involve whatever it is you've not been telling Terra at our meetings?

Silver: You could tell?

13: :rolleyes: You have a terrible poker face when it comes to that.

-----

Lisa: Ugh...I still don't feel so great...

Terra: You too?

Lisa: I thought it was just the worry getting to me, but...

Terra: This reminds me of something. What was it...?

Both: :mymy: *runs to the bathroom* :yuck:

Terra: Oh yeah. :D

*elsewhere*

Elina: I wonder if they've noticed yet? :devil:

Sarah: Who's noticed what?

Elina: :D :evillaugh
DungeonJman

12-24-06, 12:28 PM		Which means that the Probability Breaker can not destroy the prophecy, despite whatever they believe that it will bring, because they will destroy the function of probability itself, and with no possibilities for the future remaining, things get really messed up, because there is a probability that anything could possibly happen, even 0 or negative, so with probability gone... Well, it's impossible to explain.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-24-06, 12:39 PM		OOcat: Wait, you're saying that the Prophecy is the only series of endless possibilities the universe can have rather than a reading of just one path? :confused: That makes it not a prophecy, because a prohecy predicts only one outcome.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-24-06, 01:30 PM		OOKaizer: Well, it's a good thing theres no such thing as a Probability Breaker.

OOC: Seriously, the Prophesy that the PROMISE Breaker is intended to destroy is that of the Dragons. This is a Matrix style plot of controlling all sentient beings. Why will be revealed at a later time.

And Lilly has a far different role than the one you describe.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-24-06, 01:43 PM		Prophesy
OOC: You mean prophecy. Prophesy is a verb, prophecy is a noun. So are you going to hit me?

Naggat: Sshh! I have to concentrate. I hate water temples
Kaizer_Ryu

12-24-06, 01:52 PM		OOC: You mean prophecy. Prophesy is a verb, prophecy is a noun.
...you know what? I never noticed that. :embarrass
urial angel of death

12-24-06, 02:08 PM		A woman in white robes walks through the cogs of Sharn. She comes across a priest and woman talking. Four children cling to the woman's legs.

Priest: You need fifty more galleons to get your husband into the heavenly host.

Woman: How am I supposed to come up with fifty galleons?! I only make half of one a week as a barmaid.

Priest: I have no control over what the gods demand.

Clarice: He's lying. The gods he forces you to worship do not exist. They are just his tools to extract money out of you.

Priest: You're the liar. I would never do such a thing!

Clarice: Then strike me down for my lies.

Priest: ...

Clarice: That's what I thought. Come with me if you want the truth.

The woman and her children fallowed Clarice, and thus became the first disiples of the False Prophet.

----------

At the druid's grove a man clad in ironwood armor climbs up to the podium. He was Cain. A hush fell over the forest as he began to talk.

Cain: My brothers and sisters it is not merely the Promise Breaker that threatens us, but the entire "civilized" world. They have abandoned their place as guardians of this planet and left it to rot and die. We must wipe them clean from the earth and start anew.

A cheer rises up from the crowd and the druids prepare for War.

------------

In Audair a farmer and his wife are having a heated arguement.

Wife: What do you mean there isn't enough food?!

Farmer: Exactly what I said. There isn't enough. No rain has fallen and the crops dried up.

Wife: What about the animals?

Farmer: The cows died of small pox and the pigs seem to have gone wild.

Wife: What are we to do. There's no way we can feed all the children.

Farmer: We have to sell them. Then atleast we might make it.

Abel left his spot outside the farmhouse window and marched into the Age of Strife.
DungeonJman

12-24-06, 02:16 PM		Four things, 1: the possible choices exist among the world, in the form of the dragonmarks there is one dragonmark which represents what will actually occur, and the rest represent possible choices that could have occured. 2: The promise is that Siberys promised that a Probability Breaker would never again arise to attempt to destroy the prophecy, so by arising, the Probability Breaker has broken that promise, and thus is referred to as the Promise Breaker by most texts. 3: It's called the draconic prophesy, because after defeating Khyber, Siberys entrusted care of the prophecy to his children while the Probability Breaker and Guarder were out of the loop, to make sure that no one else would try to mess with it. Of course, they corrupted the interpretation to the point where they believe that it shows a definite future, and that individual dragons try to prove their own interpretations of it correct. 4: Finally, the ones who disregard the deities are correct, in some sense. There is a higher power that controls the world, but the Host, the Dark Six, the Becoming God, etc. are all just beings of immense power that have achieved immortality, and want to now influence event to further their own uses. This coincidentally, explains, while not actually a deity, why Erandis d'Vol is worshipped by those of her cult that actually know about her, and how she can not be killed by dropping a house on her. Including the good ones, which means that in order to make sure that the Probability Guarder is not corrupted, Dol Arrah can not be allowed to maintain control over him.

OOC:This is how i logically see how the prophesy works, you may disregard it if it is too much of a pain in the rear.
rampant

12-24-06, 02:39 PM		You better not pout
You better not cry
I'm telling you why
'Cause Squirlly clause
is coming to town
he see's you when your shedding
he know's where you've hid the nuts
so hide them somplace good
or he'll eat them all right up

A Squirrel is sitting in a red sliegh with 9 miniature demon chocobo, the leads beak is bright red.

Squirlly Clause - Squeak-eak-eak ( Ho-ho-ho )
Kaizer_Ryu

12-24-06, 03:11 PM		OOC:This is how i logically see how the prophesy works, you may disregard it if it is too much of a pain in the rear.
While that would work in another campaign, this one doesn't work that way.

You may have read it already, but in this version of Eberron, the Dragons and the Prophecy work more like this (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=760281).

In the version of Eberron that the FF exists in, the breaking of the Draconic Prophecy is a GOOD thing. The only problem is how it is going to be accomplished. If you have ever played Final Fantasy Tactics, the role of the Promise Breaker is analogous to that of the Zodiac Stones. Neither good or evil, just the key to changing the world.

The Host and the Dark Six are supposed to be working together on this, but instead of acting as the Sovereign Host, they are acting on their own interests.

The way I see it (and Charles may disagree. He's DM-iest after all), the Pantheon as a whole was created by the Progenitor Dragons to watch over the workings of Eberron from afar, influencing the general, but unable to effect the specific. That task was left to the races that inhabit the world. As the Children of Syberis began to exercise undue control over the Children of Eberron, the Pantheon has been trying to intervene and restore the natural order. Unfortunately, events like the Schism, the rape of Arawai, and the Mockery's betrayal have led to mistrust and divisions among the gods. Each wants to shape the world in the way they see fit.

Right now, the Shadow is mostly in control. The rest are not going to sit idly by.
DungeonJman

12-24-06, 03:23 PM		Alright, fine.

*shifts back to normal*

Wait, since i'm in the matrix, that means the laws of physics don't exist

*attempts to jump 50 ft in the air, but fails and crashes*

Achika: Wow, Elina has it much easier than I ever did.

Owwww. Alright, based on what OOKaizer said, all that i just said was moot. Seeing that unless one of them says otherwise, i have no power here, i'm going back to the containment box AND I'M NAILING IT TO THE STUPID DECK THIS TIME!!!

*goes back and uses soverign glue to glue the box to the floor, before putting nails in it and getting in. He also wards it so that until he gets out, nothing can get in or out except for him*

*grumble* :mad: :( :allalone: :raincloud: What's the point of trying to help the corruption of an innocent person and stop a meaningless slaughter if every attempt to try and stop it is stopped. */grumble*
Paulon

12-24-06, 03:29 PM		Chalky sniggers as he carefully uses more sovereign glue to seal the box. He then proceeds to set up paint bombs so that anything disturbing the box containing DungeonJman, whether to do something to it, or just to exit it, will result in a nice new coat of paint and more sovereign glue. :P
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

12-24-06, 03:36 PM		[QUOTE=DungeonJman;10997753]
*goes back and uses soverign glue to glue the box to the floor, before putting nails in it and getting in. He also wards it so that until he gets out, nothing can get in or out except for him*
QUOTE]

(ooc: Airholes? just a sugestion...)
DungeonJman

12-24-06, 03:40 PM		It's a +5 box of Containment of Irrational Smiters/Railroaders/etc. Part of the magic used to make it insures that an air supply is created by the box so the person won't die of lack of air. However, food and drink are still a problem. Uh and for the record, did anyone check up on the Flamite Kanatash?
Paulon

12-24-06, 03:42 PM		(ooc: Airholes? just a sugestion...)

Chalky: Don't you mean Paintholes? :D
DungeonJman

12-24-06, 03:46 PM		No, Chalky, the box creates its own air supply. so i don't need air holes in this thing. The better to completely seal off the person from the world, so that they stop the irrational smiting/railroading/etc. In this case, it's getting in the way.
rampant

12-24-06, 03:57 PM		Kithle, Stupid, Nalfein, and Unrevealed are hurtling through the air.

Kithle - IT WAS A BEE!

Nalfein - Not no mo' it ain't!
----------------------------------------------------------------

Micheal - Now you need to be careful putting up decorations, you need to find a spot that's just right, not over crowded, but don't touch a bare spot first.

Gaz - Huh? well that makes no sense I mean Let me just put this rightgaaak ITS EATING MY HAND!

Gaz pulls back to find Rip chewing on his fingers.

Micheal - *nelson laugh* Hah - Hah AHHHG

Teiza bursts out of the tree latching her fangs on the back of Micheal's neck.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-24-06, 04:16 PM		Sithis returned to the FF shortly behind the others. He had tracked Elina's scent almost to Mordain's tower, till something else had caught his attention. Beneath the smell of blood, he could barely distinguish two trails. Elina's was one, but the other...

Terra, Lilly and the others had arrived at Fleshweaver Tower, so he thought it prudent to follow the second trail. However, it went cold shortly after splitting with her's. What this meant, he could not tell. Had someone been trailing her? Could that being be responsible for the carnage he had seen, setting Elina up as part of some twisted scheme? Could it simply have been a psychopath, hoping to cash in on the carnage in service to their dark masters? Was it merely coincidence?

Too many questions. Too little information. There was no need to worry anyone further. If they decided to come looking for her here, Elina was in the single safest place in Eberron.

In the meantime, he would wait patiently for this prey to come to him.
ratslinky

12-24-06, 05:05 PM		*Gaz getting his finger chewed*

Gaz: ouch

*casts sleep on rip*

Gaz and Esabar: aww he's so cute when he's asleep

*Micheal still having his finger chewed*

Micheal: can you cast that on this girl

Gaz: no

Micheal: why not?

Gaz: cause you laughed
rampant

12-24-06, 05:22 PM		Satnak - Teiza! No more junk food.

Serene - You'll spoil the supper your mother spent all day on.

Teiza - Meh, i think this one's spoiled anyway.

Teiza grabs the Sleeping Rip and scurries off.

Micheal - Thats a relief...

...

...

..:mad: HEY! JUNK FOOD!
DungeonJman

12-24-06, 05:23 PM		Well, i'm depressed, need something to reaffirm my belief that good is worthwhile, and i don't care what anyone else on this crew says, there is only one way to do it!

*jumps out of the box, before being hit by the paint trap*

What the ?!? Red and green paint? Oh, hardy har har. Better find somebody with some Universal Solvent.

*walks to find somebody who has*
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-24-06, 05:38 PM		Kithle, Stupid, Nalfein, and Unrevealed are hurtling through the air.

Kithle - IT WAS A BEE!

Nalfein - Not no mo' it ain't!
OOC: :heehee
Okay, here's what I'm going to do for the 8-bit parody: reveal who Red Mage is played by, and then anyone who wants to can join in.

OOcat: So get cracking!

OOC: :mad:
**********
Linda: So, Nalfein, why have you been silent all this time?

Nalfein: Certainly not because I'm using ESP to see you without you clothes on!

Linda: :uh-huh: *inch away*

Nalfein: (ihh :D She doesn't suspect a thing.) So, anyway, I thought Linda here could join our Light Warrior team.

Kithle: Aren't you Lisa's evil twin?

Linda: Through some fortunate twist of fate, I cannot remember anything about my past other than I was evil and Lisa's twin (or clone, I'm not sure). I was found wandering the roads of Eberron by a group of international healers, who took me in and taught me the ways of Good. I have now made it my life to save the world from Evil.

Kithle: Okay, sounds legit. So what skills do you bring to our just quest?

Nalfein: :mad: Our just quest? What makes you think you're going to be allowed a part in this?

Kithle: Fighter's and your's on this incomprehensible legal document. :whatsthis

Nalfein: What? Let me see that! (take document, reads it, and falls over due to the brain shutting down because of the insanely complicated legal jargon)

Kithle: Lazy. :bored:

OOcat: :mad:

Kithle: Well, I hope that puts to rest any questions about the legality of anything I choose to do. So, Linda, my question still stands: what do you bring to the team?

Linda: Well, I healed Nalfein from the brink of death after beating there with my hammer.

Stupid: It's like having Lisa all over again!

Nalfein: (ihh Pleaseletherbestraight, pleaseletherbestraight.)

Kithle: Let me just check that fact out. (turns to Bunny) That true.

Bunny: *nod*

Kithle: And you're not angry.

Bunny: Nalfein's more useful to me alive.

Kithle (turns back): So you can heal and beat down. I never realized someone with healer class levels could be so versatile.

Unknown: But not as versatile as my class!

Rose in a wide red hat with a big white feather in it and a red cape leaps into the scene.

Nalfein (just recovered): Rose? What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be rescuing Zella or something?

Stupid: Didn't that sign say something about rescuing a kidnapped princess?

Kithle: I doubt Zella is the daughter of King Steve. Though the incompetance of getting captured so often does speak to a certain similarity.

Rose-look-alike: I was once named Rose, but because of an incident in my past I became known as the Spoony Bard. So I choose to embrace it, and I shall be known forevermore as *strikes a dramatic pose* El Spooño!
(Note for those of you just coming in: El Spooño is a Rose from some Alternate Eberron.)

Nalfein (praying): Please, dark gods beyond the comprehension of mortals, don't let me have to adventure with someone this freakin' stupid!)

Stupid: Oh joy, someone to sing of our great deeds as we fight the vast legions of evil!

Nalfein: (ihh Because one is way too much.)
**********
Our Rose: Hey, I get more use out of my Alts then you do.

Jarlot: You keep telling yourself that, Spoony.
Charles Phipps

12-24-06, 05:44 PM		OOC: I still don't see how this makes not breaking it a good thing. Anything that attempts to dictate peoples' lives to them is a bad thing.

Eh, Prophecy's good and evil depends entirely on two factors....

1. How good a prophecy's outcome is.
2. How cynical you are about humanity's ability to govern itself.

:-)

And yes, that Ganon was great.

But yes, DungeonJman I actually like plenty of your ideas and may insert them. Sorry about the situation but basically, this one adventure sidequest has been very well planned out by me and Kaizer via PMs. The rest of the thread is very free-form but we tend to DM it between us. If you want to contribute, please feel free to PM ideas and we'll work it in. Sorry you didn't want to join in the great battles though.
DungeonJman

12-24-06, 06:08 PM		It's ok, the problem is that I can't fight for either side considering, that the future appears to be set in stone, regardless of what I try to do, but Elina hasn't done anything wrong, all i can think about is the balance of the two opinions.

Inclinations combined: Sounds pretty Neutral to us.

Well it is and it isn't, because i am looking at it as good, but both sides are equally good but misleaded. Although i probably will have to take a side. Wow, that sounded a lot like the way Eberron probably took it. Anyway, gotta remove the stupid paint bomb.

*tosses out a crumpled up piece of paper as he's walking away*

Guess i won't need the seal after all.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-24-06, 06:24 PM		Kithle: *sitting on a Crate of Holding containing every known vial of Universal Solvent in the Multiverse* :D

DungeonJ: Oh, HELL no!

Squishy: For the quantity you require, the normal fee would amount to... *presses a few buttons on his calculator* about 300,000.

DungeonJ: :confused: For a monopoly, that seems almost reasonable.

Squishy: Chibi Gold Dragon Whelp skulls.

DungeonJ: That's horrible! Why would you want to kill something so Good and adorable?!

Squishy: *shrug* Platinum works too.

DungeonJ: What prevents me from just smiting you?

Kithle: That would be stealing. :P Plus, this box is wired to implode should anyone but me open it.

DungeonJ: Do I have to say it?

Kithle: You know it.

DungeonJ: You Magnificent Bastard.
rampant

12-24-06, 06:26 PM		DungeonJ - Guess I have no Choice...

Kithle - Yep!:D Its a chili bath for you!

DungeonJ - Could at least pretend not to take pleasure in my pain?

Kithle - I could, but I won't.:D

DungeonJ - Razzafrakka (wanders off to the kitchen)

Kithle hops over the quartermaster's desk, and turns around.

Jam - Hey that incredibly tiny little thing back under the heaviest item, in the farthes corner turned out to be a bag of talcum powder.

KIthle - Thanks.:D (exits toting several massive bags)

Jam - Hey! where'd all the rope go?

Screams can be heard emenating from the galley.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

12-24-06, 07:05 PM		(OOC: Just hit midnight here so Merry Christmas to all EBNEs )
Kaizer_Ryu

12-24-06, 07:24 PM		Satnak: Are you SERIOUS?!

Terra: I know! Isn't it great? :D

Serene: How long?

Terra: Elina says she first noticed about a month ago. She's been dying to tell us, but she wanted it to be a Dol Dornmas surprise.

Lisa: She was a little disappointed we found out before hand. But still, they're both looking forward to being big sisters. :D

Serene: I'd say that's a pretty amazing present. :D

Satnak: What other gift makes you sick and happy at the same time? ;)

OOC: BTW, rampant, how's Serene coming along? Isn't she expecting as well?
DungeonJman

12-24-06, 07:34 PM		Ow, :twitch: :twitch: so :twitch: :twitch: much :twitch: :twitch: pain :twitch: :twitch:. I really need a good speech about everything that's been happening. John, i'm feeling pretty annoyed about how being good sometimes puts you at odds with everything around you, got any advice?

(OOC: before you guys list me as being in pain (again), i'd actually like to see if a real lecture from John could actually be uplifting, if anyone here could figure out how to write one of his speeches)
rampant

12-24-06, 07:48 PM		OOC: Sorry I'm normally behind the inidents that cause him to make the speeches.:D

John - Yes I've been meaning to talk to you.

OORampant walks to the other end of the ship.

John - Jerk!

OORampant - As to Serene, YOU CAN'T PROVE ANYTHING!.

OOKaizer - Um yeah I can look at these old posts.

OORampant - TIMETWISTER!
rampant

12-24-06, 07:52 PM		Pholly is hiding in the spice rack behind the pepper.

Norbaz - Salt?

(Pholly hands him a shaker.)

Norbaz - Oregano

(Figure it out.)

Norbaz - Gnome Jerky

Pholly - Is that cousin eddie?

Norbaz - Pepper

Pholly - Hello

Norbaz - ... Garlic
urial angel of death

12-24-06, 08:44 PM		Squishy: For the quantity you require, the normal fee would amount to... *presses a few buttons on his calculator* about 300,000.

DungeonJ: :confused: For a monopoly, that seems almost reasonable.

Squishy: Chibi Gold Dragon Whelp skulls.


Take a cthulhu plushy for perfectly capturing the spirit of a neogi.
urial angel of death

12-24-06, 09:00 PM		Rose is leading the group through a very clean white room full of nerdy looking people in lab coats. One of them walks over to the group. He was oriental and thus exempt from the rule that nerds have to look like nerds. Of course all asians are assumed to be nerds so it kind of cancels out the benefit.

Man: Hello my name is Wu Whateley, head genetist and researcher at Mythos Park. We have been able to reconstruct the races you see here from the little bits of genetic information extracted from the finds of good mister Terrek here.

Terrek: Surely you can't have found out enough to clone them based on what we've found.

Wu: Oh we had to fill in some gaps on our own.

Wu and Terrek get into a overly complicated conversation that everyone else, failing to have a Ph.Ds in biology, ignores. Rose leads them to the next room, leaving Terrek behind.

Rose: This is where we keep the dangerous chemicals. Several of them among the most deadly toxins known to man.

Kerrith: *hold syringe* Cool!!!

Sarah: I want one!

Rose: Put those down, you stupid kids.

Sarah: What if I don't wanna? :P

Chaos ensues.
rampant

12-24-06, 09:20 PM		Jingle Bells
Jarlot Smells
Spoony Laid an egg
Te-i-za eats your face
and Satnak made cornbread hey!

Feel free to do your own
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-24-06, 09:54 PM		OOC: The first part is perfect, since Jarlot is Batman, and as his adopted son Rose is Robin.
Jingle Bells
Jarlot Smells
Spoony Laid an egg
John the Keel wants to schpele (sp?)
And Errandis got a-way, hey!

Jarlot: My arch-fiend is on the loose! Come, Spoony Wonder, to the Jarlotcloset!

Rose: You're always going into the closet. Can't you just admit that we wear tights because you're gay?
rampant

12-24-06, 10:00 PM		Rose - I vote we chuck them!

Jarlot - This ain't a democracy Spoony.

Rose - We just had elections!

Jarlot - And you lost, get over it!

Rose - They're gifts from Kithle! For your own sakes if not for mine!

Pholly - See here! They're rigged watch!

Pholly unwraps his present from Kithle, which is marked "Do not open until Dol Dornmas", to find... A pair socks.

Lisa - How could you!

Norbaz - You Little Spaz!

Izzy - I know they're not the best presents in the world, but they were marked!

Rose - Shame on you!

Kithle - Cookies anyone? Oh dear did you get impatient Pholly well enjoy.

Crew glares at pholly

Pholly - HOW DID I BECOME THE BAD GUY HERE!!
Paulon

12-24-06, 10:22 PM		Kithle - Cookies anyone? Oh dear did you get impatient Pholly well enjoy.

Crew glares at pholly

Pholly - HOW DID I BECOME THE BAD GUY HERE!!

OOPaulon: Because Kithle is...

Chorus of the entire crew: A Magnificent Bastard!
Kaizer_Ryu

12-24-06, 11:19 PM		OOC: Hooray for the Magnificent Bastard! Just keep him the hell away from me!

IC:

And now, the Dol Dornmas/Mirronmas Wish lists of the Kaizer crew.

Terra:

1.) New outfits for 'play-time' :devil:
2.) The instruction manual for teenaged girls (hey, if all the absurd things on this ship are possible, there's GOT to be a way to get one of these)
3.) And, as always, for everyone to STOP ASKING FOR MIRACLES!

Lisa:

1.) Cute outfits for my wife
2.) Gift cards to an armory. My current suit isn't gonna fit so well after a while
3.) +6 Fuzzy Handcuffs of Goddess Restraining

:embarrass What? She keeps breaking the normal ones!

Sarah:

1.) Scrunchies.
2.) To finally be allowed to get earrings
3.) Boobies!

Elina:

1.) A dairy to write all about both my attraction to Lilly and my irrational contempt of him
2.) TO BIND THE SOULS OF MY ENEMIES TO ME FOR AN ETERNITY OF TORMENT AS I BRING CIVILIZATION TO IT'S KNEES AND CRUSH THE LIGHT OF HOPE FOR ALL TIME!!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! :evillaugh

...whoa. Where did that come from? :confused:

3.) Boobies!

Not-Walter:

1.) :weep: More screen-time
2.) To finally evolve to my next form
3.) For my entity to actually figure out what my next form should be

Genevive:

(remember? Terra's familiar that I've mentioned only once before?)

1.) :weep: To be mentioned at least once outside of the post I was created in
2.) :weep: To be given a personality
3.) :weep: Not to be relegated to obscurity by my entity's inability to think of anything for me to do

Kitsune:

1.) I'm a freaking spirit fox! What could I possibly want?
2.) Seriously, stop asking
3.) On second thought, your soul might prove tasty...
Charles Phipps

12-24-06, 11:27 PM		A Very Merry Dol Dornmas Do Not List from your Returned Captain


1. The 'Jingle Bells, Batman' smells song is banned.
2. Despite the fact I'm not Batman.
3. Zella is forbidden from playing the naughty Christmas Elf.
4. ...Oh sorry, that's just how she normally dresses.
5. Rose is forbidden from using carolls to increase the crews attack bonus by +1.
6. Tirmek is forbidden from pointing out how Dol Dornmas is a celebration of a religion that has persecuted his people for centuries.
7. He is also forbidden from shouting that Dol Dorn being born in an Armory to a virgin is a fairy tale.
8. He is not allowed to disturb the gifts of spears, moonshine, and stolen treasure.
9. Or kick over the Three Dragons who came to visit him.
10. Tirmek is not allowed to suggest that the Sacred Bush came from pre-human Goblin rituals and adapted to Dol Dornmas.
11. Any more anti-Dol Dornmas antics will get Tirmek shot with a few dozen blessed crossbow bolts.
12. Rose is forbidden from influencing reactions of The Grand Druid to get better presents.
13. Ketler is forbidden from trying to outsource the Grand Druid's toy making to Zilargo.
14. No one is to disturb the freshly killed elk and rum we leave out for the Grand Druid.
15. Remember, Dol Dornmas isn't about recieving, its about killing.
16. Explosive Runes are not appropriate for Dornmas Cards.
17. Fruit Cake will not be laced with explosives.
18. Rooseveldt is not to be given to orphans of Sharn for Dornmas.
19.....even if we should really do something for them for orphaning them.
20. It is wrong to animate the turkey for the Dornmas meal.
21. Michael is not allowed to 'Snoopydance' when he's drunk.
22....or when sober.
23. It's wrong to hang skulls up as Christmas ornaments.
24. Ketler is forbidden from possessing mistletoe.
25. Ditto Terra and Lisa....
26. Because tentacles and Dornmas don't mix!
27. The meaning of Dornmas isn't measured by how much Nog you can imbid without throwing up.
28....because Throwing up is perfectly acceptable.
29. It's wrong to make fun of Lilly and Rose because their holidays don't have anything cool.
30. Arrawanukah is a well respected tradition by Half-elves everywhere.
31. Plus, it's 8 days!
32. ....so we can forgive them for killing Tirra Mirron.
33. Oh hush Lisa, don't mark yourself as a half-elf sympathizer by claiming the demons did it!
34. Someone please tell Zella the Grand Druid really DOESN'T have a horde of Elvish slaves up at Frostfell.
35. ....then call the Grand Druid to hide them when we scry.
36. Dwarves are forbidden from Dornmas celebrations from talking about their clans.
37. Because we have ENOUGH relatives without filling the entire ship with them.
38. Midnight Dornmas will be celebrated by the ritual lighting on fire of an Orc.
39. .....followed by the sacred assbeating.
40. The song "Gnomel Gnomel, Born is the King of the Keeper's Well" is now forbidden as a carol.
41. So is the Little Boomstick Boy.
42. Slayer Bells Sing Are you Listening is okay.
43. I saw Mommy Kissing the Grand Druid is allowed so long as we edit the part where he engages in a death duel with her husband.
44. It is wrong to make a killer Snow Golem named Frosty.
45. Even if you do think that its pretty damn scary.
46. It is wrong to turn Redshirts into Reindeer in order to pull the Sleigh of Holding.
47. For example, we'd need to fit them with horsehoes of flying first.
48. Aerith is forbidden from cheating with her Snow Angels.
49. No, Lilly, the true meaning of Dornmas isn't Hot Snow Bunnies when you go skiing at posh resorts.
50. .....it's just damn close.
51. Aerith is forbidden from convincing Jimmy Stewart that he has reason to live by raining fire and death down upon Mister Potter's mansion as divine retribution for his evil deeds.
52. Yes, I recognize how much cooler It's a Wonderful Life would be if he did.
53. "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" is not to be edited to the true story as how little Sarah Loo Who hunted him down and slit his the bugbear's throat.
54. Yule Logs are not explosives nor should they be treated as such.
55. The Grand Druid is not played by Tim Allen.
56. The Grand Druid does not employ cloning machines to appear on every street corner.
57. The Grand Druid is not married to Erand D'Vol.
58. Missus Grand Druid is a Hot Dryad Queen.
59. It is wrong to make fun of the Grand Druid's Dire Reindeer.
60. Especially the Half-Fiendish firesnorting one Rudolf.
61. The Little Onion Kid aka Ishmael the Third is not to be allowed onboard.
62. Mostly because Nalfien has killed his parents several times and it's wrong to be orphaned on Dol Dornmas.
63. One shouldn't argue with King Steve that he invented Dol Dornmas.
64. Hey, if you don't like him, move to Aundair!
65. Doog is forbidden from haunting Michael further.
66. Even if Michael didn't change his ways in the slightest.
67. Ketler is forbidden from marketting Hello Kitten Christmas merchandise.
68. Ketler is forbidden from taking the Positive Material Plane Gate he's stolen and using it to tie to his power cables for our Dornmas lights.
69. Those Lights that also make us Visible from ORBIT I point out.
70. It's not polite to share orc meat with the Half-Elves on Dornmas.
71. Remember, it's not Kosher.
72. It's wrong to creep out DungeonJman with how we've horribly perverted his world's traditions.
73. Even if his world's religions are kinda creepy.
74. Everyone's families are not allowed onboard unless people want to drastically cut down their relations.
75. No, YOU DON'T GET VACATION FROM YOUR JOBS!
76. A sub sandwich is not a proper Dormas feast.
77. It is not a holiday tradition to go find some gnomes to beat up.
78. No, going to the Islands between us and Xen'drick is not a holiday tradition!
79. Pot is not an officially sanctioned Dornmas treat!
80. Clubbing the Grand Druid when he leaves the Chimmney doesn't do any good.
81. Ketler, stop using the Coal he leaves us to power the ship.
82. Marish is asked to no longer use the skin of Redshirts for Mittens.
83. Yes, I know its a Statement about Fur is Murder.
84. Iceskating on lakes of blood is not fun.
85. Despite how much Sarah and Elina are looking forward to it.
86. Michael, for the last time, the Grand Druid knows you want beer for Christmas.
87.....and a grown up Sarah which is sick.
88. Ketler just wants Sarah and will be punished.
89. Lilly, I swear, if your list says you want 'Sword' then you'll be hurting.
90. Rose, we know you want one of the 6 Sage's daughters whose not a whiny b***
91. Lilly, you having sex with the Fish girl is something we didn't want to know about.
92. Miko is forbidden from being jailbait Christmas Elf.
93. ...Oh that's how she dresses normally.
94. Ketler is forbidden from setting traps for the Grand Druid in hopes of extorting more presents.
95. No one wants to see Dornsus vs. The Grand Druid on South Park.
96. Tinsel is not to be made from Sarah's treasure horde.
97....that ticks her off a lot.
98. Jaela is not allowed to spend the entire night with Parn as her Dornmas gift.
99.....because the sounds frankly are even more disgusting than Terra and Lisa.
100. Are summoning Yugoloths in there!?
101. Balls jokes are not to be made about the ornament decorations.
102. Candy Canes are not to be enchanted as 'Wands of Sticky goodness.'
urial angel of death

12-24-06, 11:31 PM		OOC: Shouldn't not-walter evolve into the next level of kython? Or possibly even a new form of kython, which I will dub xenomorphs. (Oh come on you all drew the connection)
rampant

12-24-06, 11:48 PM		Tirmek
1. For people to stop calling me the knightmare prince.
2. For Elina to stop acting like she's the only one unfairly marked by prophecy.
3. Spend more time with Sarah
3a. Spend more time with Sarah, Hurting Kerrith and Lily.

Dorvos
1. A grand piano
2. A Deamon Hide drum

Naz'roth - :hides:

3. To be able to wake up without cat fur in my mouth

Teiza
1. A giant axe
2. A tome detailing the ins and outs of shadow magic
3. Pants that actually fit all four tails

Corre
1. Pants that actually fit all four tails
2. Dancing shoes
3. Fencing lessons

Satnak
1. A sleep effect that works on living abberation/constructs
2. For someone to put up a decent fight one of these days
3. Riku (Kingdom Hearts2) costume for Serene

Serene
1. Sora (Kingdom Hearts 2) costume for Satnak
2. +6 chains of deicide restraint
3. Chocolate!

Kithle
1. To drive Kanatash Sane
2. To see Pholly explode so bad Phollie not only feels it, but implodes.
3. Its written on a scrap of paper in this box which may or may not have a trap of some sort, and I may or may not have placed a mental cumpulsion in your brain to find out anyway.

Chalky
1. More paint
2. More havoc
3. More Narrators *crunch*

Fluffy
1. A sudden boom in the rat population
2. Slaypaw to be in heat more often
3. Add trawling nets to the ship for fish

Kittens
1. That creep to stay away from Mittens

Mittens - mew (which of you numbskulls put this on)

2. Grandma and Serene to have another kid, I'm lonely

Shred - :allalone:

3. CATNIP!

Squirrels
1. More birdfeeders!
2. Lower Taxes!
3. Less potholes!
Kaizer_Ryu

12-25-06, 12:04 AM		OOC: Bravo to both Charles and rampant. Just one thing:

2. For Elina to stop acting like she's the only one unfairly marked by prophecy.
Elina: Wish granted.

Tirmek: :mad: It's about time!

Elina: Except, in my case, I'm going with it.

Tirmek: And proving them right in the process.

Elina: If that's what you want to think. If I didn't want to do this, I wouldn't. You said it yourself, fate is crumbling here. I am the one who will bring it down once and for all. And I will do it in my own way. :mad: No moldy old tome is going to tell me what I will and will not do!

Tirmek: *whispers to Sarah* You know what? ...I liked the old Elina better. Now she's just so...

Sarah: :( Intense and creepy?

Tirmek: Yeah.
rampant

12-25-06, 12:38 AM		Ketty
1. To not have to buy training bras for my son.
2. Ditto for any other girls clothes.
3. For Tirmek to take up a few more masculine hobbies, like gardening.

-------------------------

OOC: Ok quick thing: Is ivy dead, like you stay dead, or like DBZ dead?
Charles Phipps

12-25-06, 12:48 AM		OOC: I think we have several layers of dead onboard this ship.

Right now, I'm pretty sure he's pretty darn dead but honestly don't mind bringing him back or him staying dead dead.

let's face it; Aerith, Marish, and Andrea were all supposed to be permanently killed.

Dooj is currently semi-dead as there's so much fun to be had mocking his Pedro like condition of being dead and no one cares.

;-)
Kaizer_Ryu

12-25-06, 12:54 AM		let's face it; Aerith, Marish, and Andrea were all supposed to be permanently killed.
OOKazier: *snuggle* :cloud9: It was my undying devotion to you that brought you back! *snuggle* :cloud9:

Aerith: *anime sweatdrop X Eleventy Billion*
Crystalforged

12-25-06, 12:58 AM		Kanatash's Wish List:
1) For my entity to get off his lazy *** more often so I get more screen time.
2) An instruction manual on emotionaly disturbed teenage aberration/spawn of the great old ones/crime against nature/etc.
3) :weep: Twilight Princess.

OOCrystalforged: I told you, you can play when I'm done with it.

OOKanatash: :ahem: But you already beat it!

OOCrystalforged: I said when I was DONE with it, not when I beat it.

OOKanatash: Ok, seriously, your obscession with that game is crossing into disturbing terretory.

OOCrystalforged: What? All I do is sleep with it under my pillow. And sometimes I cuddle it at night. :shifty: Well there was that one time when mumble mumble...

OOKanatash: TOO MUCH INFORMATION! Seriously, that is just WRONG dude!

OOCrystalforged: :blush:
Charles Phipps

12-25-06, 01:02 AM		Rose's Wish List

1. For Mordain to stay dead.
2. For Zella to stop being so demanding (fat chance huh)
3. For that pretty girl at the ranch to come back to me for some R&R
4. For the Triforce in my room to stop being so bright.
5. A steady job with lots of rupies.
6. A new set of green caps.

Lilly

1. To be all Goth and Emo over my brother's death.
2. To make that not irresistibly sexy to Miko.
3. To get a better God than my puppet.
4. That Elina and Sarah get their 3rd request.
5. Horrible torment on Tirmek.
6. Warforged Graft oil.

Zella

1. For men to keep acting like idiots over boobs.
2. Rupies.
3. More Silver Arrows (this time with gemstones)
4. For Impa to WORK AND SLAVE once more for me.
5. For Rose to remember our True Wuv.
6. A tiny version of me as a child.
rampant

12-25-06, 01:30 AM		Tirmek - THANK YOU AUNT SATNAK! *hug*

Satnak - Don't thank me yet, that's your last present from me till your twenty, including the years I missed from the time twist got it.

Tirmek - Oh,...Ok then. razzafragging brat better appreciate this.

-------------------------
OOC: hehehehehehe (insert :evillaugh), no one resserect ivy
ratslinky

12-25-06, 01:45 AM		Gaz's wishlist:
1. To get more EXP so i can cast for charm spells
2. Charmers book of making friends

Esabars wishlist
1. More exp so i can cast scry
2. Boobies
rampant

12-25-06, 02:00 AM		103. Nor shall you call them rods, Staffs, or Dorjes of sticky goodness.

104. No Satnak, I don't know how we're gonna get the Grand Druid to visit when your family doesn't sleep.

105. I don't know lock them in a chest or something.

Maladren
1. For those three idiots to stop being an embarrasment to the race.

Rakshasa Bard - All I'm saying is if we find out why he isn't there maybe we can narrow down the search.

Rakshasa Assasin and Sorcerer - STUFF IT SPOONY!

2. For Everyone to stop ignoring me!

3. For that little cutie Ivy to come back, and to wear mens clothes for once. One Kilt won't kill you!
rampant

12-25-06, 03:12 AM		Liam
1. For the Island brats to Respect my copyrights and patents on the Wiersan tech!
2. My entity to come back.
3. To be involved in more plots.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-25-06, 08:48 AM		Igor
1. To have my lisp back.

Erk: I have no need of goods, of the material sort or otherwise.

Lucky:
1. A new character to fall in love with (female)
2. More screen time.
3. Girdles of Femininity/Masculinity in different styles.

Saberiel:
1. For Aerith to realize that all men are stupid and come back to me.
2. More screen time.
3. For Lady to never get all teenagery and/or emo.

Lady:
1. [incomprehensible scribbles]

Mr. T: I pidy the foo who don't know 'am Arrawist. (:gift: if you get the reference)

Tony:
1. For Tirmek to have a GRRRRRRRRREAT life.

Ninja Jaela #26
1. For people to stop assuming I'm some sort of colorfull, flamboyant animé ninja.
2. For everyone to stop hitting on me, I'm celebate by choice.
3. Stealth breasts.

Mendova:
1. To get some decent enemies in here to kick out.
2. To find a decent man.
3. To atain newer levels of A**-kickery.

Roosevelt: I know I'm not going to get any of my wishes, so I don't bother.

Maivy:
1. To find The Bunny.
2. For Spoony to realize that I'm his true love and not that whiny tramp Zella.
3. For someone to listen to me (aka more screen time).

Caralot: I live on the greatest experimental breeding ground in the multiverse, who could ask for anything more? :D

Silver:
1. For Norbaz and Andrea to finally get their freak on.
2. For Tara and Naz'roth to get their freak on.
3. For various young people to realize who they're in love with.

13:
1. World peace.
2. An end to fear and prejudice.
3. For people to just make it more challenging. :D

Bunny:
1. For no one to get ressurected this time.
2. Another year of quality deaths.
3. More chances to use the HADOKEN.
urial angel of death

12-25-06, 11:21 AM		Kerrith

1. Elina
2. For my mother to stop beating me
3. a collar of dominate monster for beastman
4. more screen time
5. to know who my father is

OOUrial: You'll find out when the time is right.

Squishy

1. More screen time
2. money
3. an elf burger

Volrath

1. No more prophecies
2. mom :(
3. for P/Y/R to dress up in a... um nevermind already taken care of

P/Y/R

1. More screen time
2. more babies
3. an explanation on how Lisa can enjoy tentacle sex without DR

Stewie

1. Death to the infernal caretaker of mine (Aerith)
2. more weapons

Myrr, Vladamire, and Lenneth

1. to appear in current timeline

Butters

1. I'm just happy the way I am!

Myrr: Who are you?

Butters: Your brother.

Myrr: I only have two brothers and you're not one of them.

Butters: Yes I am. I was just alittle late and mom kind of forgot me.

Myrr: Sucks to be you.

Butters: no it's just swell.

OOC: Yes it's that Butters
Kaizer_Ryu

12-25-06, 12:24 PM		Sarah & Elina: Merry Dol Dornmas! :D

Tirmek: What's all this?

Sarah: Your presents, silly.

Tirmek: There's quite a few here. You sure these are all for me?

Elina: :rolleyes: If you don't want them, we'll take them back.

*about a half an hour later*

Tirmek: :nonono: My mother is going to have a conniption.

Elina: :devil:

Sarah: I think we've out done ourselves, Sis. :D

Tirmek (female version of himself) is dressed in a dark blue pleated skirt and button down dress shirt. Overlaying the shirt is a vest bearing the One Eye Academy insignia, topped off with a large bow in front. Cute little black shoes and dark blue kneehigh socks complete the outfit.

Tirmek: This...is probably the weirdest gift I got this year. Or maybe ever.

Sarah: :cloud9: Kawaiiiiiii... :cloud9:

Elina: You like it?

Tirmek: Maybe I'm just being prudish...but did you have to get the complete set?

Elina: Oh, come on. The shoes are so not too much.

Tirmek: No...not that. :blush: The...um...undergarments. :embarrass

Elina: :stare:

Sarah: :embarrass Eh hee hee...:blush:

Elina: :doh: Ok, I'm out of here. That's just wrong on so many levels.
rampant

12-25-06, 12:27 PM		Sithis - Sorry Bunny.

Tirmek - (holding up a golden wish ticket) I wish for one rift to open on the coordinates 45,63,75,(-33) at an angle of 176 degrees, using this location as the origen point, for a period of 2 minutes!

Dramatic background music...

OORampant Kicks Devon

OORampant - That was your cue!

Music starts

Tirmek and Sithis Use their Projection techniques to reach through the rift.

Tirmek - Remember the plan.

Sithis - On it.

At the scene of Lily, and Ivy's fight.

Ivy - Stop Holding back brother!

Lily - I... (eyes change color to brown for a split instant) RAZIA SWORD!

Ivy - WTF!!

A wave of fire and light leaps forth from Lily's sword, bearing down on Ivy.

Ivy - :( aww :censored:
------------------------------

Present

Ivy Still in his other form, (and slightly crispy) is on the deck staring up in bewilderment.

Ivy - Why am I not dead, why do i feel violated,...and why am I wearing a kilt?

Sithis - I don't know bigby's spells yet so Evards was the best I could do to get you out of the inferno.

Ivy - The kilt?

Maladren - :blush: your clothes got pretty singed
rampant

12-25-06, 12:45 PM		Tirmek - (in school girl outfit) Oh Stay here I've got something or you two! Toss me my outer robe It has the call stone in the pockets.

Sarah - You might put it on:D

Tirmek - Left pocket near the top.

Sarah - Um... Its a nice little diamond, but its kinda only one.

Tirmek - No thats mine, I just have your gifts stored in it, its a callstone.

Elina - Oh yeah a bunch of the kids have one of these, Vedris showed me how to use them. Just touch them and focus on the file name you want.

Tirmek - Its S&Eg3.

A small box with silver wrapping paper appears in each hand.

Tirmek - You can put my callstone back now.

Elina - Wow dragonshard necklaces.

Sarah - Yeah we wanted to get these in Drooam!

Tirmek - Yeah I did a little nosing around. Gnolls seem to be pretty honest with Rakshasa. All I had to do was sneer and they brought out the good merch right quick.
urial angel of death

12-25-06, 04:36 PM		Stewie opens up the present he recieved from his parents to find a fully atomatic catapult. Which of course looks like a crossbow with a catapult arm attatched to the firing mechanism.

Stewie: At last!

He rushes off to Aerith's room.

Stewie: Die vile matron!

Stewie fires a stone that narrowly avoids hitting Aerith and creates a large hole in the wall.

Stewie: Blast!

The catapult returns to its firing position and loads a new stone all be itself.

Aerith: Oh no violent toys Stewart. *takes away catapult*

Stewie: How dare you I- *interrupted by bottle being stuck in his mouth* zzzzzz.

Aerith: How cute!
DungeonJman

12-25-06, 04:58 PM		You know, what i said before about Elina not doing anything wrong is starting to have less meaning, don't make me end up working for the as-of-now-deluded army of humanity because she's giving in to the prophecy.

Hey, considering this is the forgotten freedom, i'm surprised that no eldritch horrors have come aboard, no one's tried to use that seal, and nothing's exploded in the last couple of days.

*suddenly an explosion rocks the ship, a beast that can not be described appears on the ship, and someone screams that they're in an impenetrable bind, all at the same time*

I guess i spoke too soon

*walks off to correct the messes*
rampant

12-25-06, 05:09 PM		Lily - What does Tirmek Have that we don't?

Kerrith - A wis score higher than his height in feet?

Lily - Besides that!

Tirmek and Sarah walk by.

Kerrith - Boobs? a cute skirt, pink p-

Lily - Don't even go there!

Kerrith - ...:shifty: excuse me
-exits-

Lily - :twitch:

Tirmek - Oh Lily!

Lily - (i.h.h. its tirmek you twit! do not stare at his chest)

Tirmek - I have someone who'd like to meet you.

Lily - (i.h.h. this is it he's gonna summon up some horrible demonic super soldier to kill me)

Ivy - Brother!*hug*

Lily - IVY!

Ivy - Its good to see you again.*kick*

Lily - AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Sarah - :heehee: girly scream

Ivy - You killed me you asshat!
Kaizer_Ryu

12-25-06, 05:21 PM		You know, what i said before about Elina not doing anything wrong is starting to have less meaning, don't make me end up working for the as-of-now-deluded army of humanity because she's giving in to the prophecy.
Prophecy (read: Dragons) says: Promise Breaker will kill us all

Elina intends to do: Free the Children of Eberron from the Dragon's manipulations

Thing of it is, how she does it is the clincher. Just beware. By attacking, imprisoning, binding, punishing, cursing, etc her for any other reason than she's actually done something worth those punishments (and that is her parents prerogative), you would merely be ensuring her continuing slide away from the side of good. She's having trust issues as it is. Don't make it worse.

The Prophesy as the mortals know it is only what the Dragons want them to know. OF COURSE the Promise Breaker would be made into some horrible villian. If you wielded virtually undisputed power over the course of world events, wouldn't you be a just a bit upset about someone coming in and taking that from you?

I'm not trying to be snippy, just pointing out that neither a 'preemptive smite' or anything of the "come to the Light Side' variety is going to work. They may very well backfire. She's mentally and emotionally a young teenager, as well as extremely disillusioned and a bit cynical. Rational thought is not in control here. What is needed is patience, understanding, and a lot of old fashioned love.

As mushy as that sounds, it works.
rampant

12-25-06, 05:27 PM		Sarah - That was a nice thing you did.

Tirmek - Those two beter appreciate it, that rift cost me all the presents from Satnak till I'm twenty, well except for the ones she already got me this year.:embarrass

Sarah - What did you get?

Tirmek - A his/hers swimsuit.

Sarah - So who gets the hers?

Tirmek - Its for shapeshifters not couples.

Sarah - Oh...OH! its one piece and it shifts with you! I wanna see that!

Tiirmek - Ulp!
-------------------------------------

Tirmek (male in green swim trunks) - :blush:

Sarah - Ok now shift.

Tirmek - Allright :blush:

As Tirmek shifts the extra fabric from the trunks detaches itself and forms the top.

Sarah - Cool! Lets go to the beach party to break it in!

Tirmek - Ok
---------------------------------------

Lily (still be alternatively hugged and pummeled by Ivy) - (i.h.h. the worst part is, I owe that furry bastard!)
urial angel of death

12-25-06, 05:33 PM		Kerrith: So will I ever win?

OOUrial: Well I'm planning on sending you on a transplanar Planescape adventure!

Kerrith: Wha?!

OOUrial: That's right you, Izzy, and any other people that want to join will be going on a plane hopping trip.

Kerrith: How does that constitute winning?

OOUrial: You might get a love interest.

Kerrith: Really?!

OOUrial: Anything is possible, but probably no.

Kerrith: :weep:

OOC: Seriously anyone wanting to sign their characters up can.
rampant

12-25-06, 05:36 PM		Dorvos - Hmmmmm

OOUrial - What? oh

Mittens drops a sheet of paper in OOurial's hands.

OOUrial - What's this, a permission slip signed by your parents, ... and a note promising horrible fates worse than death should anything do permanent or extreme damage.
DungeonJman

12-25-06, 05:43 PM		I did not mention exactly what would push me to be allied with the major forces of humanity. I'm not making a decision until one of the sides commits enough evil that i would fight against them. This is why i have not actually took any direct action in order to destroy either side. Oh and who actually created the prophecy? If i remember you correctly, you said that Siberys attempted to preservethe prophecy, so that means that he could not have created it, or at least not without the consent of another progenitor dragon.
urial angel of death

12-25-06, 05:50 PM		OOC: Is it just Mittens or both Dorvos and Mittens. Also can you remind me who they are again. It's kind of hard to keep track of all the characters.
rampant

12-25-06, 05:54 PM		Dorvos and Mittens

Dorvos (bard/psion) first child and so far only son of Satnak and Serene, Mittens (Cat) is his Familiar.
------------------------------------------------------------

Cole and Schroedigger are attempting to sneak up on Corre while she's putting on her dance shoes.

Teiza - Hey Boys!

Cole - We dead.

Schroedigger - Oh so very dead.

5 seconds later the boys are dashing down the beach

Cole - Get her away from us!

Schroedigger - (i.h.h. do I have to outrun Teiza or just Cole?)

Teiza - (holding a two handed axe) Weeeeeheeheehee
Charles Phipps

12-25-06, 06:58 PM		I did not mention exactly what would push me to be allied with the major forces of humanity. I'm not making a decision until one of the sides commits enough evil that i would fight against them. This is why i have not actually took any direct action in order to destroy either side. Oh and who actually created the prophecy? If i remember you correctly, you said that Siberys attempted to preservethe prophecy, so that means that he could not have created it, or at least not without the consent of another progenitor dragon.

You're thinking too hard on this dude. In a crazy game like this, sometimes things get retconned or changed. Oddly, I'm really surprised by the devotion you've shown to what is really a fairly minor plotline aspect of the storyline. You've focused on Elina and her corruption/near corruption to the exclusion of all other story elements. Ironically, that's the one area that really isn't something that needs the involvement of outsiders in it.

Our current take on the Prophecy is simply summed up by this simple guide.

Dragons= Controlling all of humanity through genetics, magic, politics, and sociology.
Promise Breaker= Person who frees them from it.

If it's out there from Eberron canon....well...yes it is.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-25-06, 07:11 PM		Oh and who actually created the prophecy? If i remember you correctly, you said that Siberys attempted to preservethe prophecy, so that means that he could not have created it, or at least not without the consent of another progenitor dragon.
OOC: According to SilvercatMoonpaw, that was what happened in Caralot's dimension upon the creation of the world. Whether the Progenitor Dragons (any or all) created the TRUE Prophecy, or if that Prophecy is any better, is not known. It's not important right now, either. The idea inherent in all this Promise Breaker stuff is that Syberis children (the Dragons) have decided that it is their task to control the direction the 'lesser' races take. Why? That will be explained later. But it is THEIR Prophecy (a.k.a. their Matrix style control over civilization and such), not the original, that the Promise Breaker is intended to destroy.

EDIT: Yeah, what Charles said. :D :P

IC:

Ivy: *huff* *pant*

Lilly: *black eye & a bit of blood* Are you satisfied?

Ivy: For now... :gah: Whoa!

Elina surprises him with a hug from behind. A rather tight, rib crushing hug.

Ivy: Can't...breathe...

Shooting Lilly a withering look, she unfurls her wings (feathers restored) and carries Ivy to the other side of the ship.

Lilly: *sigh* :(

-----

Elina: I'm sorry...

Ivy: For what?

Elina: You died trying to protect me, and I never once took you seriously.

Ivy: *shakes his head* I did things...unforgiveable things. It may have been the power of my mo-...of Khyber...flowing through me, but there were times I was jealous of how you looked at my brother. Of how affectionate you were with your parents. I wanted to be part of that, and my desires were twisted.

Elina: They don't blame you for it. I don't either. And Ivy...

The entire conversation, Elina had been inching towards Ivy, while at the same time, he inched away. By now, Ivy had his back to the wall as she looked him right in the eyes.

Elina: :smirk: I'd like that too.

Ivy: :eek: :blush:

Lilly rounded the corner at this time. A stiff breeze would have knocked him over from the shock. His own brother, recently returned from the dead, against the wall as Elina kissed him. Not just some peck on the cheek. Full on. He didn't even notice that Ivy was just as surprised as he was. Finally, Ivy gets ahold of himself and pushes Elina off him.

Ivy: :confused: :blush: What the hell? Were did that come from?!

Elina: You told me yourself you really loved me. I'm merely returning the affection. Is that not what you wanted? :(

Ivy: I...

Elina: The night you died, after it looked like you had won the battle, you gave me a choice. If I would accept my destiny, you wanted me as your bride. If I refused, you would free me from it.

She runs her fingers along her neck, tracing the scar he had given her.

Elina: I've decided to accept my place as Promise Breaker.

Ivy: Elina...

Elina: :( So that was a one-time offer?

Ivy: No! That's not it at all... I'm just...not sure if that was really me. I felt an...all-consuming desire that night that drove me to do those terrible things. We're too young, Elina. This isn't the right time for such things.

Ivy walks away, oblivious to the fact that Lilly had been standing there not moments before. His brother had turned and left in a combination of anger and shock without a word, never hearing Ivy's refusal. Elina now stands there, mostly alone.

Elina: :mad: Too young, huh?

Kitsune: On some level, you are still judged to be a child. Not an unfair assumption considering your physical appearance.

Elina: Sarah gets to have her fun, why can't I? I'm older than she is, dammit!

Kitsune: Your sister was not quite so...bold with Tirmek. These things take time. Give him the opportunity to adjust, and you may get the reaction you desire.

Elina: I wonder how Lilly will take that little show I gave him. :devil:
rampant

12-25-06, 07:13 PM		Two figure cross paths in a corridor

Kithle - Hey pholly

Pholly - Hey kithle

Both keep walking

Pholly stops after two steps

Pholly - HOld on a second did i just? :twitch::twitch::uh-huh: :headexplo

SKUGAFOOM!!
-------------------

Phollie - I feel :yuck:

scrinnnnch
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-25-06, 07:32 PM		Silver: SCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE! :evillaugh
**********
Writer-OOcat: Get to the Kitten Meets Her Grandparents plotline!

Plot-OOC: You think this is easy?
DungeonJman

12-25-06, 07:42 PM		Well, it's kind of hard to be involved in more plots, considering that i'm actually on the Forgotten Freedom, and don't have the power to make people do what i want, as you guys do.
urial angel of death

12-25-06, 07:43 PM		Ivy is hit over the head with a dragon-headed staff wielded by Kerrith

Kerrith: Get back in there you idiot!!!

Ivy: What the hell?!

Kerrith: Elina said she loved you! If you have any sort of manhood at all you're going to march back in there and return her affections.

Ivy: Don't you like Elina?

Kerrith: Yes, but that isn't important. She chose you and you know as well as I do that the girl chooses the guy in both our worlds. I have no right to question her choice.

Ivy: Won't that make you depressed?

Kerrith: My happiness is not important. The only thing that matters is Elina's feelings, that's how I was raised and that is how I will conduct myself.
Charles Phipps

12-25-06, 08:24 PM		Well, it's kind of hard to be involved in more plots, considering that i'm actually on the Forgotten Freedom, and don't have the power to make people do what i want, as you guys do.

In a strictly in-character sense yes my friend. On the other hand, you're welcome to join the crew and crack jokes etc. Just.....try not to be the one to come up with solutions and so on for Elina.

Or just clone yourself and have one be the writer ;-)
Charles Phipps

12-25-06, 08:35 PM		IC:

*crickets chirp*

Lilly: Have you noticed our Entity is missing?

Rose: Yes.

Lilly: I need him to RPG out my extreme reaction to Ivy getting chosen by Elina.

Rose: What is your reaction?

Lilly: I sorta killed Ivy. I think begrudging him happiness at this point would be in rather bad form.

Rose: Been taking eloqution lessons from Zella again I see.

Lilly: I love my brother. It hurts but I only care about Elina's happiness.

Rose: That's a mature decision.

Lilly: Yes, I suppose everyone can occasionally roll a 20 on a wisdom based check.

Rose: But yes, Charles is watching Robin of Sherwood

Lilly: I hear crying.

Rose: He's at the Norman's shoot Robin full of arrows scene.

Lilly: How is he even watching it!? It's not out on DVD until March!

Rose: Hello, PIRATES.

Lilly: In any case, I'm dropping the Paladin class.

Rose: So you've said.....but you're really good at it.

Lilly: I don't believe in good any less dad but I don't know if I can honestly believe in the absolute nature of it anymore. I'm not up to being able to be an exemplar of it.

Rose: So what will you do now?

Lilly: I'm going to pledge myself to Boldrei I think. Maybe change out my Paladin levels for Ranger or something else in one of those plot device things.

Rose: I think those only happen when a new edition comes out.

Lilly: I slipped the DM a fifty...which he apparently used to pre-order the above series.

Rose: Well I wish you luck.

Lilly: I hope Dol Arrah forgives me. In the meantime, I'm going to try and get my head on straight. I don't think I can wield a sword without ever thinking of Ivy again.

Rose: Zella can teach you the Arcane Archer class.

Lilly: That's only for half-elves and full elves.

*Rose puts girdle of Elfmanity on him*

Lilly: GAH!

OOC: With everyone's permission, I'm still up for doing that two year time skip.
Paulon

12-25-06, 08:39 PM		Well, it's kind of hard to be involved in more plots, considering that i'm actually on the Forgotten Freedom, and don't have the power to make people do what i want, as you guys do.

OOPaulon: Well, if you insist...

*wanders through a convenient rip in spacetime, grabs DungeonJman, and tosses him through it into what's loosely defined as the 'real' world.*

OOPaulon: Antarctica is nice in summer. :evillaugh

*wanders back through the rip himself, ending up back at home rather than with DungeonJman*
ratslinky

12-25-06, 08:41 PM		*Sarah, Tirmek and Elina are walking along when they see Gaz turn down a corridor holding to bulging bags. he had a very pleased expression on his face*

Sarah: hey gaz whats in the bags?

Gaz: A shipment of candy for ketler :D

Tirmek: How'd you get it?

Gaz: I convinced the derlivery man that he should let me have it :devil:. Want some?

All three: Yeah!:D
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-25-06, 08:41 PM		Kitten stand in front of the doors of Erk's Place, her coat on, her backpack loaded, and another bag full of clothes carried by Caralot. The expression on Kitten's face is one of boredom.

Kitten: I still don't think this is going to work.

Caralot: :rolleyes: If you really want to think of it as you just visiting your grandparents. You don't think that's stupid, do you?

Kitten: Well…no—

Caralot: Good, because here we go!

Caralot grabs Kitten's hand, and the abstracted icon is pretty much dragged through the doors and into the humm of the bar. A few patrons look up.

Kitten: You make it sound like just meeting them will be an experien—what's that thunder—*SQUEEZE!*—ing!

Darastrix [fat, dark-skinned human female ninja chief]]: Grandbaby!

Caralot: Mother, remember not to crush her unconcious.

Darastrix holds Kitten out at arms' length to get a good look at her.

Darastrix: You're such a cute little thing. Isn't she the cutest?

Assembled Bar: Awwwww.

Kitten: (ihh 13 is around here somewhere.)

In fact 13's trademark black tail can be seen waving over the shoulders of some patrons.

Caralot: Kitten, this is your grandmother, Darastrix Aesthyr.

Bruce Jarlot [male half-vampire satyr (transformed male half-elf) former masked vigilante/former airship pirate/former hero/retired]: Darn it, woman, no need to run off so hard that you set the floor shuddering. (stands up from a table near the bar's stage and walks over) Cari! It's so super to see you again, me girl. Give your old pa a hug! :D

Caralot: Oh, dad. (hugs him)

Bruce Jarlot (turning to Kitten): Well blow me down with a goblin's wind, I know you're into breeding oddities, me dear, but you've outdone yourself with that see-through fellow.

Caralot: :embarrass

Kitten: And my appearance doesn't frighten or disgust you in the slightest? :confused:

Darastrix: Silly thing, of course not. You're our granddaughter.

Bruce Jarlot: Besides, they've got worse things than you back home in the DAV [trans. Department of Arial Vehicles]. *laugh*

Kitten: Don't joke around with me. :mad: I may look like a little kid, but I've seen how cruel the world is.

Bruce and Darastrix get a serious look on their faces.

Bruce: Like cons on every step of the ladder—

Darastrix: —sickoes around every corner—

Bruce: —panicing mobs lowerig IQ—

Darastrix: —evil cults bent on killing in the cruelest way possible and then destroying the world—

Bruce: —people who hate you despite you having the best intentions—

Kitten: I guess Caralot told you.

Bruce: No, we were reciting those—

Darastrix: —from memory.

Kitten: (ihh They…they're being sincere! :eek:) But you're so jolly!

Bruce and Darastrix embrace Kitten in a great big hug.

Darastrix: That's what you're coming with us to learn.

Bruce: Aye! And meet your relatives while you're at it.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-25-06, 08:48 PM		OOPaulon: Antarctica is nice in summer. :evillaugh
OOcat: Who's summer? North or South?

Bunny: Because in one you freeze to death in complete darkness, in the other in complete daylight.
Paulon

12-25-06, 09:26 PM		OOcat: Who's summer? North or South?

Bunny: Because in one you freeze to death in complete darkness, in the other in complete daylight.

It's summer down there. So anyone down there gets to see every detail as they freeze to death. :D
urial angel of death

12-25-06, 10:56 PM		Kerrith: Why would I go plane-hopping?

OOUrial: A reason will be coming.

Kerrith: Sure.

After few moments late an ethereal marauder materializes inside of Kerrith's room. Out of its mouth comes a voic that would be impossible for its bestial mouth to produce.

Voice: Brother, you're needed back home.

Kerrith: I have no brother, Bastard.

Voice: Why must you be some hostile?

Kerrith: Because you are a reminder of mother's violation.

Voice: I have no control of who my father was.

Kerrith: Alright Bastion what am I needed for?

Bastion: There is no time to explain. Just get here fast.

OOC: Last chance to sign people up.
rampant

12-25-06, 11:59 PM		Kithle - Ok troops lets-

Spoono - I object! Theif is an elf as the closest thing to an elf I get to lead.

Kithle - Ok you're saying that since you have the most elf blood you get to be in charge?

Spoono - Indeed

Kithle - How many gallons is that? *Holds up blood drawing gear*

-----------------------------------------------

Terra - Where did you get pants that fit them?

Satnak - The old Dwarf Lady

Serene - Mrs. Greyholme was happy to help us alter some.

------------------------------------------

Ketler - GODS MY ARM!

Teiza - Stay away from me and my sister!

Lisa - You know you're supposed to use a hammer.

Teiza - Axes have better critical damage, without sacrificing heft like a scythe.
-----------------------------------------------------------

Tirmek (female form) - I had a realy nice time today. Thank you for spending it with me.

Sarah - You wanna try a few team fights for the crux?

Tirmek - I'd like that.:)
-------------------------------

OOC: I'm fine with a two year jump
rampant

12-26-06, 01:05 AM		Teiza - So the shadow energitic is based on creation, hmmmm.

Corre - 1 and 2 and -Oof

Teiza - Corre are you allright!

Corre - Just tripped.

Teiza - You never trip.

Corre - I'm trying to work my dancing in with the moves cousin Tirmek showed me.

Teiza - I thought you said you were getting the hang of that.

Corre - That was the diamond mind stuff. Tiger Claw is harder because you spend less time on the ground.

Teiza - I can't wait to learn to fly.

Corre - ... No eating Uncle Cole.
---------------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Lily!

Lily - Come to gloat?

Tirmek - No I wanted to thank you and Ivy for the *ahem* gift, Sarah thinks I look good in green.

Lily - *begins to froth at the mouth*

Tirmek - *walking away* (i.h.h. hehehe that'll teach him, not that I'd let anyone see me in that!...Maybe Sarah in a year or 2)
------------------------------------------------------

Kerrith - Ok How am I supposed to compete with that! HE CAN TURN INTO A GIRL! Ivy was one thing, BUT THIS JUST ISN'T A FAIR CONTEST!
Charles Phipps

12-26-06, 01:32 AM		Ivy: Errr...Lilly.....

Lilly: Yeah?

Ivy: ....I don't like Elina.

Lilly: WHAT!?

Ivy: Well she's nice and all but I was overwhelmed by the evil inside! I like someone else!

Lilly: Who!?

Ivy: Tirmek.

Lilly: GAH!

Ivy: But only in his guy form.

Lilly: :OMG!

Ivy: Hey, it's a very awkward time for me!
rampant

12-26-06, 01:50 AM		OOC: Silvercat is a little over worked so a little recap is in order.

Bunny - Teiza has potencial!

13 - Kithle's on a roll and the angst is so thick you could cut it with a knife!

Silver - Fiendish/Celestial/Werewolf/Half-Elf demigoddes + Elite Lineage Half-Nazarune Rakshasa 1/4 each human and elf, Well hot damn! This one isn't even in Caralots notes.

OOKaizer - 10!

OORampant - 9!
Charles Phipps

12-26-06, 01:59 AM		Aerith's Wants

1. Peace on Earth.
2. To continue sexually pleasing Jarlot.
3. For Sabriel to accept my heterosexual tendencies no matter how much they disgust her.

Jarlot's wants

1. To Drink the Para-elemental plane of Rum dry.
2. To be the Captain forever.
3. A Tiffa and Yuffie to complete my FFVII set
rampant

12-26-06, 02:05 AM		Jarlot Holds up a bottle a few drops fall to the floor.

Jarlot - Why is the rum always gone?

13 - Mail!

Jarlot opens the Letter:

Dear Captain,

BECAUSE YOU DRINK IT ALL YOU :censored: LUSH!

Signed,
The Crew
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-26-06, 09:30 AM		OOC: My personal preference is that we not jump things ahead so much. We miss out on a lot of opportunities when children grow up fast. Plus I can't accelerate Caralot's universe, so Kitten is going to essentially miss out on two years. Do what you want, I just think you're in too much of a hurry.

Silver: Ivy and Tirmek. Yes! Gay love.

Doog: What about me?

Bunny: You're dead.

Doog: But I'm not—

Bunny pulls out a HUGE freakin' gun.

Bunny: Who is it around here to says when people are dead?

13: Wait, gay people can't reproduce. Lesbians, sure, both parties are female. So why would you care?

Silver: I'm the god of fertility and associated activities. This falls under that category, and frankly there always needs to be at least a little to show I'm not playing favorites.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-26-06, 10:41 AM		Satnak: What's this?

Terra: Open it.

Tearing into the envelope, she pulls out a certificate:

"This certificate entitles one 'Satnak' the use as she sees fit of a doppleganger of one 'Terra' towards the caretaking of her children. Can be redeemed at any time and for any reason. Infinite uses."

A rune is inscribed below Terra's signature.

Satnak: Say what?

Terra: Just as it says. You need to sleep. Your children and wife don't. I know how reluctant you are to leave her alone, but you need to take care of yourself as well. Should you need help, or just someone to keep an eye on them, or anything of the kind, just activate the rune. It's attuned to only you and Serene, so no worries about the kids or anyone else abusing it.

Satnak: But...anytime, anywhere?

Terra: The dopplegangers are like a cross between astral constructs, clones, and mental projections. They are me, but they're not me. You should see how many I've got going at once sometimes.

Satnak: You're absolutely certain? You have more on the way yourself.

Terra: They won't really be affected by that. It'll be harder to disguise which one's me since only my true form will show I'm pregnant, but that's not something I need to worry about with this.

Satnak: ...all right. Thank you. *hug*

Terra: Ribs...collapsing........spleen...crushi ng........self...narration...increasing. ..

-----

Lisa: Hope you like them.

Serene: I'm sure I will. *open's gift* :OMG!:

She holds up a brand new Sora outfit (Satnak size, Final Drive form), complete with imitation Keyblade.

Lisa: It's even got the shoes and everything.

Serene: And Satnak's gift from you...?

Lisa: :D ;)

Serene: *CRUSHING HUG*

-----

Satnak: Sorry. :embarrass

Terra: *gasp* That's...ok...

Satnak: What else was it you wanted to tell me?

Terra: Oh, right. Teiza said she wanted to learn Shadow Magic, right? I'm pretty much the best source to go to right now. I'd be more than happy to teach her.

Satnak: :D Really?! :D

Terra: Whoa!

In order to take the second hug, Terra goes shadow form, letting Satnak squeese as hard as she wants without further damage.

-----

Elina: Well, since you both figured it out before Dol Dornmas, I can't surprise you with the great news...

Terra: We know. It's all right if you don't have anything. We're just happy you're ok.

Elina: Oh, but I do. Another bit of information that you don't know yet.

Lisa: Really?

Elina: Want to know? :devil:

Terra: Uh...yeah...

Elina: Mom, you're carrying more than one.

Lisa: Twins?! :D

Elina: Triplets.

Terra: :D :blink: I'm...carrying...three...? :twitch: :w00t: :ghosted:

Lisa: Oh, honey, that's wonderful! *hug* Thank you for telling us!
rampant

12-26-06, 11:05 AM		13: Wait, gay people can't reproduce. Lesbians, sure, both parties are female. So why would you care?

Ishmael jr. - THE HELL WE CAN'T!

Flashback

Ishmael jr. is lying on a hospital bed, swollen sweaty and heaving!

Doog - Almost there hun! (i.h.h. ask micky to regrow hand)

Dr. Terra - It's a boy!
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-26-06, 11:09 AM		[you know what it says]
Silver: Um……………………Okay, even I'm not sure how that works.

OOcat: Time to redefine the definitions of male and female on this flying hive.
rampant

12-26-06, 11:26 AM		Tirmek, Lucky, Caralot, Kanatash - YA THINK!
------------------------------------------------------

13 - :D
urial angel of death

12-26-06, 11:35 AM		Volrath: What's really sad is this makes me the most normal.

-----------

OOUrial: I'm sorry all but you just didn't have the potential that I thought you would, and the storyline was kind of finished. So all of that avatar stuff is going away except for Clarice.

Cain & Abel: What?

OOUrial: It's simple because you didn't affect much and the story wouldn't work anymore you simply nolonger exist and Clarice becomes a loose end to the story.

Cain and Abel disappear in a poof of logic.

Clarice: So does my cult still exist?

OOUrial: Yes. We need villians and/or allies for future storylines.

Clarice: :D

OOUrial: Now to focus on Kerrith and way far future.
urial angel of death

12-26-06, 11:41 AM		Terrek, Terra, and the rest are boarding tour jeeps. Rose and the kids in one. Terre, Terrek, Reman, and Nalfien in the other.

Terrek: So what keeps the creatures at bay. *through walkie-talkie to the other car*

Rose: Various eletronically powered spells. No need to worry the backup system is foolproof *walkie-talkie turns off* Why do I get the feeling that I'm wearing a red shirt?
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-26-06, 11:47 AM		13 (imitating Malcom): So what keeps the mythos from breeding?

OOcat (imitating some scientist guy): They're all female.

13 (imitating Malcom): Why do I hear laughing?
urial angel of death

12-26-06, 12:15 PM		Rose: Now we're coming to the Star Spawn exibit. We currently only have two, because of the difficulty involved in creating them. There's the juvenile now.

Mindflayer comes into view.

Chaosium executive: We should have won that lawsuit!

---------
Klaz is walking to the weapons locker.

Klaz: Better safe than sorry. After all this is the first time visiters have come, so there's bound to be trouble.

Klaz picks up the islands only firearm, a rocket laucher, and deposits it in one of only two gas-powered jeeps in the park, the others are pulled along a track.

Klaz: Just gonna leave 'em here in case.

----------

Back at the control room Ketler walks away from the computer he was manning.

Ketler: Hey guys I'm going to get the a soda from the vending machine. Any of you want any.

Wu: Nope

Laim (head enigeer, you know he was a black guy in the movies): Sure pick me up a cola.

Kanatash is too focused on the view screens to pay attention.

Ketler: See you later then. *exits*
rampant

12-26-06, 03:14 PM		Terra - Girls, I don't hear you talk about the kids from school much.

Sarah - Well, ...

Elina - She doesn't like them, because they hate her boyfriend.

Sarah - Tirmek is not my boyfriend!

Elina - So he's your girlfriend?

Sarah - MOM!

Lisa - Elina stop teasing your sister.

Elina - Anyway they always get uncomfortable whenever he is nearby, and he gets nervous whenever there's more than 2 of them.

Terra - 2 of who?

Elina - Well there's Vedris from my bladeweaving class, Sithis has a class with her too, arguing back and forth about esoteric arcane formulae it never stops with those two.

Sarah - Bezen still has control issues.

Elina - Every time he gets stressed out or scared that angel of his goes on a rampage.

Sarah - It's like wetting the bed for 'zerks.

Elina - Tellowas, he's trying to be a breaker like his older brother. Serious case of hero worship.

Sarah - I don't like him.

Elina - He's pretty much the president of the "I Hate Tirmek Fanclub"...He'd get along great with Lily and Kerrith.

Sarah - Lets not forget the vice president.

Elina - :rolleyes: Reser d'Gelleon, and before you ask, yes he's legacy clan. Great strategist though, almost as good as Tirmek when it comes to air or sea based scenarios.
DungeonJman

12-26-06, 05:14 PM		So, cold, must resist freezing... :gel:
rampant

12-26-06, 06:24 PM		Tirmek - Thanks for helping me find some decent shapeshifting clothes.

Gaz - No problem.

Tirmek - Esbara? do you have any advice on controlling the urge to drive your foes to dirt beneath the marching feet of your armies, and dominate all those around you?

Esbara - Sorry, half-demon, all I have problems with is controlling the impulses to destroy.
------------------------------------------------------------

Terra - What I want to know is where she got them.

Lisa - Silence!;)

Terra - Yes, mistress:D
--------------------------------------------------------------

Lily is poking the boxes from Tirmek with a ten foot pole.

Ivy - Brother those boxes are empty. He took the rune daggers and gave them to Kerrith and Izzy after he yanked me through time.

Lily - *Poke poke poke*
-------------------------------------

Jarlot is holding the box from kithle, he tears the paper oh so slightly

Bang!

Fake snakes go flying everywhere.
------------------------------------------

13 - Thats it FAKE SNAKES! YOU DIDN'T EVEN USE LINE FROM SNAKES ON A PLANE YOU SENILE BASTARD:eek:
:twitch:

Bunny - 13 is indisposed so, I'll do it. You got burned (licks a paw, places it on 13, and makes a hissing noise)
Crystalforged

12-26-06, 08:45 PM		OOCrystalforged: Well this is a little late but its better than never. I've got a little Dol-Dornmas present for Elina.

Kanatash: If you're wondering why no one else is getting presents, there's a couple of reasons.

OOCrystalforged: The first reason is because I'm lazy but you know that already.

Kanatash: And most of the crew probably would know better than to open gifts from me. :D

OOCrystalforged: The biggest reason though is Kanatash doesn't celebrate the same holidays as most of the crew.

Kanatash: Thats right. We Xoriatites doen't celebrate Dol-Dornmas or any of the other cheep knock off holidays that happen at the same time. Our big holiday is Flagthnfest which happens on the midnight of the last day of the year when we celebrate the dying of the year and your reality drawing a little closer to its ultimate demise.

OOCrystalforged: Well enough chit-chat, without further adu we present Elina with the DM Breaker 2.5.

Kanatash: We figured with all the **** your entity has been putting you through lately you should have the power to return the favor. It's specially calibrated to your entity and is powered by your semi-divine aura.
rampant

12-26-06, 09:15 PM		Lisa - Thanks for coming, I know how much you hate the transportation here.

Terra - Don't remind me.

Elina - Ooooooh the next generation of 'crowns

Sarah - Interchangeable libraries, multi-energitic capability, Rechargable storage, specialty models, Sweet christmas thats stupid fresh!

Lisa - Look at all of this stuff!

Terra - I know why Satnak likes this place.

Lisa - Excuse me...

Desk Elf - Oh hi I'm Teseriel. Can I help you ladies?

Lisa - Yes we got gift cards for this place from a friend of ours, and so we don't know this place very well.

Teseriel - And you need help finding where the stuff you can use is. The inventory is arranged by item slot, then within that category they're divided by energitic compatibility, then by function. So the Armor is on aisle 5, the channeler stuff will be on the middle right, light armor is closer to me as you move towards the back the suits get heavier.
rampant

12-26-06, 11:17 PM		Lily - hahahaha

Ivy - What's so funny?:mad:

Lily - You're joking please tell me you're joking

Ivy - No

Lily - :censored: TIRMEK! :censored: ing TIRMEK!
Paulon

12-26-06, 11:46 PM		So, cold, must resist freezing... :gel:

OOPaulon: Anyone want to place bets on how long it takes him to notice that the rift back to the FF is still open behind him? :P
Crystalforged

12-27-06, 12:50 AM		Heh, he sounds like a friend of mine from college. Thats what you get when a guy from the bahamas decides to go to college in south dakota.

:evillaugh And he thinks its cold now...
Kaizer_Ryu

12-27-06, 12:57 AM		Lisa: I'm looking for something that would adjust to changes in body dimensions.

Teseriel: Such as?

Lisa: I'm expecting.

Teseriel: Oh, well congratulations! But...you don't mean to get into any fighting do you?

Lisa: Oh, heavens no. It's just that after having Sarah, I found that my armor was quite a bit...tighter in the chest. :blush:

Teseriel: Ah...

OOC: rampant?
Kaizer_Ryu

12-27-06, 01:02 AM		:evillaugh And he thinks its cold now...
THIS?! He think's THIS is COLD?! :OMG! :P

This is crap! I have yet to lose feeling in my hands on the way to my car! I haven't even had to shovel yet!

Not that I'm complaining about that. I hate the cold. So, of course, I live in Iowa. Real smart move there. :rolleyes:

Yes, I know. It's hard to believe we know what computers are in Iowa, much less that we have internet access. They all run on corn. That's all we have here. Corn and pigs. This state sucks. :D
Charles Phipps

12-27-06, 01:20 AM		Next-

Lilly visits Sigil!
Crystalforged

12-27-06, 01:37 AM		I know. I keep telling him this is brisk. We don't even start to consider calling it cold until it hits -10. I can't wait to see how he reacts when he has to cross three foot snow drifts to get to class. :D I also love to tell him about how they figure out the tempurture in Alaska. That is they spit and they can tell whether its above or below -50 by whether it freezes before or after it hits the ground. Maybe I should see if we can send him there and see how long he survives.
rampant

12-27-06, 02:00 AM		OOC: That depends Kaizer, do you like pork and cornbread sandwiches:D
------------------------------------------------------------

Teseriel - Hmmm, You don't carry enough magic to get the most out of the big polymorphers, most of the disguise armors aren't really built for front-line use, hmmmmm I may have just the suit. (heads towards a storage closet) Keep an open mind, ... it's an older model gk... made for shifters and changelings who favored heavier armor.

Teseriel drags out a stand with a suit of tan matte armor plates held together by an underlayer of black material reminiscent of both leather and rubber. The helm covers the left side of the face completely, except for an eyehole, while the right is mostly open.

Teseriel - These old Marches models need a bit of matainance, esentially this one' a giant plant that feed off positive energy. I'll cut 5% off if you get Sarah to stop chasing my kids up trees.

Outside

A young were-tiger is hiding in the branches of a large elk.

Were-Tiger cub - mew

Sarah (at the base of the tree) - Ruff Ruff!
Kaizer_Ryu

12-27-06, 03:23 AM		Moments later.

Sarah: *being held by the collar a few inches off the ground* :bigeyes:

Lisa: *face palm* *sigh* No, you being a werewolf does not excuse that.

Sarah: Awwwwww... :weep:

Terra: Sorry about that.

Elina: :nonono: Honestly, sis.

Teseriel: *holding the cub* You took care of it, no harm, no folly. Any thoughts?

Terra: You said this was a plant?

Tesetiel: More or less.

Terra: :plotting: :schemes:

Teseriel: *anime sweatdrop*

Lisa: :rolleyes: Because I know her all too well, I have to ask: How would this react to druidic skills and magic? And out of curiosity, what kind of positive energy are we talking about? How does it feed?
rampant

12-27-06, 03:47 AM		Teseriel - Well it feeds via absorbstion, any use of positive energy radiates off some energy that escapes the effect. This suit can absorb that, which has the added benefit of masking the use of such effects without dampening them. Now for any serious damage to the suit you'd need to channel postive energy right into it, just like healing or turning undead. Once I take it off the stasis disc I advise you keep it in a green house or secure garden of some sort. It can go without sunlight or water for a week assuming it has access to positive energy. As to druid magic, I'd advise not using reduce plant or enlarge plant, it does have certain vulnerabilities to druid magic, since it can be affected by their plant manipulation spells, but it resists psionics and negative energy. On the upside since your friend there is a druid, she can use her magic to help you as well, Shillelagh becomes pretty nasty when you're talking about tthe whole suit, or for another example (pulls out a small sphere) use entangle when I toss the ball.

As the ball arcs through the air, Terra unleashes her spell the suits left hand raises itself and forms the vines of the spell.

Teseriel - If someone's wearing the suit they can control the vines to a limited degree. Or have them come from somewhere else if you need your hands free.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-27-06, 07:50 AM		Silver: A suit of armor that can manifest vines. I don't even need to say it.

Bunny: It's never made sense to me why canines are stereotypically associated with going after felines. There's nothing special about that relationship, they go after squirrels too.

13: Whatever works. :D
Kaizer_Ryu

12-27-06, 09:10 AM		Silver: A suit of armor that can manifest vines. I don't even need to say it.
OOC: Oh, you know that crossed their minds. :devil:

IC:

Terra: What do you think, hon?

Lisa: Well, the possible combos and dual techs seem almost limitless. I say sold. But one last question: How would it react to augmentation?

Terra: Oh, good point. Say I wanted to add something to it. Would it function like a mage enchanting regular armor, like an Artificer adding components to a Warforged, or what? I don't want to screw up the flow.
urial angel of death

12-27-06, 11:39 AM		Yes, I know. It's hard to believe we know what computers are in Iowa, much less that we have internet access. They all run on corn. That's all we have here. Corn and pigs. This state sucks. :D

And it still has higher test scores than California. That's just plain sad. :weep:
urial angel of death

12-27-06, 11:42 AM		Next-

Lilly visits Sigil!


Kerrith: Yeah someone else is coming with me!

OOUrial: But you hate him.

Kerrith: I get lonely. :weep:
rampant

12-27-06, 11:42 AM		Teseriel - Good luck adding flight or blight based abilities, other than that it functions like enhancing normal enhanced armor. Little tip, the vines carry the enchantment of the gauntlets even if you're not manifesting from the gauntlets. Actually though you should find it easier to tinker with, this stuff is designed and built by druids predominantly, so its designed to be easy for them to alter.
rampant

12-27-06, 11:55 AM		Kerrith - Ok I have one young mage of un-matched potencial, me.

Dorvos - :rolleyes:

Kerrith - One knightmare of biology, and its owner.

Mittens - :confused: mew (was that a dig?)

Kerrith - One psycho Void user.

Izzy - hi

Kerrith - And one spoony mage paladin, that wants to become a spoony mage ranger.

Lily - hate you
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-27-06, 03:24 PM		Kerrith - And one spoony mage paladin, that wants to become a spoony mage ranger.
13: Go-go Spoo-ny Rangerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Squirrel Chorus: Dun, dun dun dun-dun!
urial angel of death

12-27-06, 04:17 PM		Kerrith, Lilly, Dorvos, Mittens, and Izzy walk the street of Sharn.

Lilly: So why are we here. I thought we would be planes-hopping.

Kerrith: Patience, young one. My master said there was a safe portal to the deep shadow here in the cogs.

-----------

A few streets over Clarice is giving a speech to a large crowd of goblins, independent craftsmen, widows, ophans, and all other forms of poor.

Clarice: Throw off the shackles of the false gods, there demons, and those who consort with them. Death to the Host, oblivion to the Six, and blade to the dragons.

Crowd: Cheer!

Clarice: Go out and destroy their influence!
DungeonJman

12-27-06, 05:30 PM		*falls back on to the forgotten freedom as an ice cube, before thawing out*

Look, could you send me to a place inhabited by humans next time!!!!

Nobby: Oh no you don't.

How'd you escape the squirrels?

Nobby: I stole the gun.

How, that's impossible!

Nobby: Ok, the half-biscuits dragged him as an offering to their demon and i took the gun before they claimed it. Which means...

*takes out the gun*

Nobby: GO BACK TO YOUR REALITY BEFORE I BLAST YOU TO IT!!!

:eek: :eek: Yes, sir.:eek: :eek:

Somebody please get me a portal that leads home before my head's blown off.
rampant

12-27-06, 05:36 PM		Izzy - Well?

Lily - Oh great he's lost! This wouldn't happen if I was a ranger.

Kerrith - Its somewhere behind this door, but its locked.

Ivy - Just knock it down then!

Izzy - Look up we shake this thing to bad, a scrag load of well scrag is gonna come down on us, Immortal or not dying hurts.

Dorvos - :rolleyes:

Dorvos moves up to the lock and floods the inner workings of the lock with his crysthral, then aligns the tumblers to open the door.

Dorvos -*pulls his finger back and reabsorbs his Crysthral* :D

Lily - Well that explains how he kept escaping his playpen.
Charles Phipps

12-27-06, 05:51 PM		I wonder how long it will take for people to point out most Ranger Skills (Spot etc) are WIS based...

;-)
urial angel of death

12-27-06, 05:59 PM		Just as the door opens and the others file in Kerrith notices the blue form of an ethereal marauder behind them.

Kerrith: What do you want Bastion?

Bastion: Just had to tell you there is an angry mob following you.

Kerrith: What the hell?!

Kerrith pokes his head out of the doorway and quickly pulls it back in after narrowly missing being hit by several arrows.

Kerrith: Well it's only a short way to the portal. Brother would you mind holding them off?

Bastion: Not a problem.

Kerrith dashes down the hallway after his, we'll call them, friends as his brother's monster turned to face the mob.

Rioter#1: The lady said they'd be here. Where are they?

Rioter#2: What's that thing?

The marauder grabs a rioter's leg. A few moments later the crushing of bone and ripping of flesh was audible...

---------

Kerrith catches up with the group. He is running.

Izzy: What took you so long?

Kerrith: Nothing *doesn't even bother to slow down, and speeds on past them*

Lilly: Why was he running.

Lilly and Izzy loook at each other then look down the hall at Kerrith. After a brief pause they both break into a run after finally realizing the implications. Dorvos was a good thirty seconds ahead of them.
rampant

12-27-06, 07:07 PM		I wonder how long it will take for people to point out most Ranger Skills (Spot etc) are WIS based...

;-)

Probably right after he finally gets his paladin levels traded in and notices the sharp drop in his will save, from loss of divine grace. On the other hand he can take favored enemy Rakshasa.
----------------------------------------

Satnak - zzz

Serene - She's so peaceful when she's sleeping.

Terra (doppleganger) - That's because of you, she used to have alot of knightmares.

Serene - So how is Teiza doing?

Terra (doppleganger) - She's very bright, buuut...
-----------------------------
Flash back

Teiza is pouring intently over a book of begining meditative techniques. She is fidgeting though.

Terra - Is there a problem?

Teiza - Um...I can't get my tails to fit in the seat.

Terra - Do you have different chairs at home?

Teiza - No just couches.

Terra - Where do you sit for dinner.

Teiza - We kneel on the floor, or sit on benches when we visit Grandpa.

Terra - Ok then your used to this then just try the first exercise.

Teiza gets out of the seat, eagerly, and kneels onto the floor.

Terra - Close your eyes, (i.h.h. give her a bit here this part might take a while) ..., good relax. I'm turning off the lights, can you feel anything?

Teiza - No. Should I?

Terra - Not at this point, but we will continue this exercise until you do, you understand the theoretical side better than most ever do. I'm amazed how quickly you took in that book.

Teiza - Thank you, still nothing.

Terra - Let it come to you, shadow magic is not an art of passion or heart, it is one of reason and logic. The first step is to sensitize you to even subtle changes in the enviroment, so you can focus focus on your casting whithout losing track of things. *calls forth a tiny orb of faint blue light*

Teiza - I can feel something.

Terra - Light or shadow.

Teiza - Shadow is the abscence of light, I'm feeling light.

Terra - Very good! When you've mastered every exercise on that list, I can start you on the fundamentals.

Teiza - Wow, thats gonna take a while.

Terra - Shadow magic is not powered by bloodline, nor by will, there are no short cuts to true mastery. I can teach you the secrets to mysteries no other caster will ever know. But those are many years from now.

Teiza - Well then I better get to work. *burblegrumblelumble* :embarrass I'm getting a little hungry.

Terra - More like alot hungry. There's some soup on the counter, bring me a bowl as well.

Teiza leaves for a few moments.

Terra - Whats taking so long?

A pigeon zips into the room at a breakneck speed, before settling dowwn on Terra.

Teiza - Mrs. Branford! Did you get it!

Terra - Get what?

Teiza - Someone ate all the meat out of the soup already, I saw the pigeon and thought maybe I should put some back in.

Terra - :rolleyes: That's a veggie stew Teiza, this pigeon is one of mine. He is not for you to eat!

Teiza - Why? Does he have some sort of defense I don't know about?

Terra - Me

Teiza - Ummmmmm, were the ones that always fly around your place at O'eight hundred yours too?

Terra - This explains why they've been so nervous recently.

Teiza - *comes in with the soup* *anime sweat drop*

end flashback
---------------------------------------------

Serene - Teiza, come here, Corre stop poking your mother, she needs to sleep.

Corre - Why?:confused:

Serene - Her body and mind are different from ours.

Teiza - A weakness?

Serene - Some might call it that, I've always been jealous. When most people sleep they get to dream.

Corre - Whats dream?

Serene - Terra?

Terra (dopple) - Its a state where the mind is putting together everything it has absorbed and felt, many times this can form sensations, images, or even stories.

Teiza - meh

Corre - I wanna dream!

Serene - Sorry hun, our brains and bodies just aren't set up that way.

Corre - Awww
Kaizer_Ryu

12-27-06, 09:26 PM		Teiza: Will I ever get to do the uber cool stuff you do with shadows?

Terra: Like what?

Teiza: The shapeshifting and dopplegangers and stuff.

Terra: Hmmm... To a very limited degree, possibly. Honestly, I've never tried to teach anyone but my girls Shadow magic. My version is a bit different than any other you'll find.

Teiza: How?

Terra: The most obvious is that by in large, any Shadowcaster you'd find would be Chaotic Evil and stark raving mad in a very bad way. That's something you need to be very careful of. Looking into the darkness has a way of twisting your perceptions.

Teiza: Point taken. What else?

Terra: Mine works on a deeper level. You understand the theory quite well, and in such a short time, too. That is an accomplishment not to be take lightly. I'm very impressed. Now stop trying to eat Not-Walter.

Not-Walter: *in the corner* Hissssssss! (get this crazy thing away from me!)

Teiza: *holding a trident* Awwwww...

Terra: One of the things I'm unsure of would be where your limit is. While Shadow magic is based on logic and reason, and can be learned by pretty much anyone with the determination to do so, the deeper stuff requires a bit more...finesse.

Teiza: Like instinct?

Terra: Not quite, and just because they won't attack you doesn't mean you can hunt the rats.

Teiza: *holding three by the tail* Drat. *puts them down*

Terra: There's some amount of feel to it. I'm pretty sure that, with practice, you'll get it. I just can't say for sure how long it'll take. Once you get a firm grasp on the intricacies of Shadow magic, I'll start introducing you to more of what I do.

Teiza: Why not now? The sooner I start, the better I'll be at it.

Terra: Normally yes, and my psicrystals are not toys.

Teiza: *stops juggling* *pouts*

Terra: Do you remember the theory of what Shadow magic really is?

Teiza: Most followers of this path of knowledge believe that Shadow magic is the purest form of magic. That all other magic is merely a reflection of it's power. Dive deep enough into the workings of the 'main stream' magic schools, and you find Shadow magic.

Terra: Very good! But you must keep in mind that this is only partly true. While it makes sense in practice, it's really nothing more than an ego-centric view.

Teiza: They can't figure it out because their own pride blinds them?

Terra: Sad, but true. Each school of mystical power has it's own role in the cosmos. Divine magic governs the soul. Arcane magic governs the body. Psionic governs the mind. Pact magic governs the memory of the world. Truename magic is a record of all as it exists outside the confines of the physical realm. And Shadow magic - drop the squirrel - Shadow magic is the frame the world is built on. What is the creed of the Shadowcaster?

Teiza: Change a thing's shadow, and you change the thing itself.

Terra: :D It's so nice to have a pupil with a decent Wisdom score...

-----

Lilly: *a-choo*

-----

Terra: Yes. With Shadow magic, you are altering and/or copying the basic structure of the target. With normal Shadow magic, you are merely making superficial changes. Once the spell ends, all effects are negated. What would happen if you could permanently alter the fundamental shape of the world in some way?

Teiza: You could do pretty much anything you wanted. But wouldn't that run the risk of making things...I dunno...unstable or something?

Terra: :blink:

Teiza: ...Sensei?

Terra: You know what? :D We are so going out for ice cream after this.

Teiza: :w00t: :confused: ...why?

Terra: You're the first one other than my girls to figure out why I'm so careful with my power, and they've got the advantage of intrinsic knowledge of it's workings.

Teiza: :D :embarrass Eh heh heh...
ratslinky

12-27-06, 09:35 PM		OORatslinky: Okay now that I have the PHB2 i am changing Gaz's wizard levels for beguiler one's.

Tirmek is walking down the corridor deep in thought when a crossbow bolt wistled past him

Tirmek: *Goes into a definsive crouch* who's their?

Gaz: *Leans out the doorway of one of the rooms* Oh sorry ive decided to change my wizard levels for beguiler ones. So i'm practicing my crossbow shooting skills. But i'm not very good and their isn't anyone to train me till I get into the island academy next term.

Tirmek: Ok but try to keep the door closed please

Gaz: Alright. can you get some books with tips on good hand crossbow shooting when you are on the island?

Tirmek: ok i'll see what i can do

Gaz: Thanks have a lolly *Throws him a lolly* :w00t:
rampant

12-27-06, 10:01 PM		Tirmek - Must resist sweet siren song of ... Sugar!

Sarah - No! *telekinesis*

Tirmek - Thanks

Sarah - Do NOT give him sugar!

Tirmek - By the way how are you paying for admission? given your skill set I'm guessing you'd need to take Arcanex (spell twisting) classes.
-----------------------------------------------

Drooam

Hob goblin engineer - I wanted this pipe buried an hour ago!

Ogre site manager - Sorry boss half my workers just Screamed "HE'S COMING BACK!" and headed for the hills.
--------------------------------------------

Teiza - Sensei?

Terra - Yes?

Teiza - Where does incarnum fit? what about blade magic?
urial angel of death

12-27-06, 10:58 PM		Volrath: Incarnum is a perversion of soul, just as eldritch is a pervesion of body.

Terra: Why are you here?

Volrath: I just felt I was lacking in screen time.

Butters: You got way more than me.

Volrath: Shut-up.
ratslinky

12-27-06, 11:19 PM		Esabar: Aww come on it's fun to see him go hyper :schemes:

Gaz: Bad demon side bad. Oh I convinced Spoony to put me thru

Sarah: How?

Gaz: It's easy i just called him Captain Rose the Brave and i told him i'd heard Zella boast to her princess friends that he was the worlds greatest lover :devil:

Sarah: But Zella thinks he's a horrible lover.

Gaz: Spoony doesn't know that :schemes:
Charles Phipps

12-27-06, 11:33 PM		Rose: Yes I do. I also don't care how she feels after doing all that to rescue her. After all that trouble, it's MY turn.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-27-06, 11:36 PM		Tirmek: *raised eyebrow* What are you doing up there?

Sarah: *on the mast* :rolleyes: I wanna be able to fly like Elina, duh.

Tirmek: Right. And this is supposed to help...how?

Sarah: Miko told me all about it. The trick is to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Tirmek: :uh-huh:

Sarah: It's true! If I'm distracted at just the right time, I'll forget to hit the ground and start flying!

Tirmek: Uh, I'm pretty sure that's not-

Sarah: Here I go! *throws herself at the ground*

Tirmek: :gah:

Sarah: :weep: Ow.

Tirmek: See? Miko was just trying to-

Sarah: I must not have done it right. One more time!

Tirmek: No-! :gah:

Sarah: :weep: Ow.

Tirmek: Will you listen to me n-

Sarah: I almost had it that time!

Tirmek: Wai-! :gah:

Sarah: :weep: Ow.

*several tries later*

Sarah: :crazy: i tHinK I'lL TrY agaIn toMorOW...

Tirmek: *sigh* :nonono: She had to roll a natural 1 on her Sense Motive check one of these days...

*elsewhere*

Miko: :evillaugh
Charles Phipps

12-27-06, 11:41 PM		Kerrith: In any case, be prepared for Sigil.

Lilly: Hold on. I'm trying out my new Prestige class.

Kerrith: You haven't even converted to Ranger yet and you've got a prestige class!?

Lilly: Yeah, sorry.

Kerrith: Well don't let it trouble....

*Kerrith is hit in the anyx with an arrow*

Kerrith: GAH!

Lilly: SORRY! Long bows are hard to load!

Kerrith: Try the shortbow!

Lilly: Okay!

*Kerrith is hit in the ass with an arrow*

Kerrith: DAMNIT!

Lilly: OH! I GET IT NOW!

Kerrith: Thank the Dark Gods.

Lilly: Right!

*Two arrows shoot right into his ass*

Kerrith: *collapses from weak Mage Hit Point score onto the ground*

Lilly: When he wakes up, I wonder if he'll realize I was shooting him deliberately.
rampant

12-27-06, 11:51 PM		Mitten - Meow ( mover closer Dorvos I'm going to hurt spoony jr. )

Dorvos - :rolleyes: Hm Hm Hm Hm

Dorvos removes the arrows, Moves as if to cast a spell of healing, stops and pulls a healiing potion out of his pack.

Kerrith - Huh?

Lily - *anime sweat drop* (i.h.h. here comes the acid arrow)

Izzy - Why not use a spell? potions cost gold?

Dorvos - Hmmmmmm!

Izzy - Just not enough gold to get you to touch him there, i see, good point.
Paulon

12-28-06, 12:02 AM		Somebody please get me a portal that leads home before my head's blown off.

OOPaulon: :thinks:

For this trick I need a member of the audience.

*eyes DungeonJman* You'll do.

*using some tools and wood borrowed from Roosevelt, a solid wooden crate is rapidly constructed about the vict... volunteer*

*dodging Chalky, who was attracted by narrator-like behaviour, OOPaulon snatches some paint and quickly writes 'Philosopher's Stone: Handle with Care!' on the crate.*

It is only a short while before Pholly wanders on the deck, and seeing the writing on the crate, promptly assumes that some Magnificent Bastard is out to get him. One thrown vial of alchemists fire later, a small grade explosion, and in place of the crate and 'volunteer' is a cloud of smoke and a burning patch on the deck.

As the smoke clears, something small and feline dashes out of it and vanishes.

OOPaulon: Must be a law of conservation of narration or something. Get rid of one character, have a new one show up.

Elsewhere, finally back in the safety of his own home, an unharmed DungeonJman is engaged in extricating himself from the transported crate using a nailfile... :evillaugh
urial angel of death

12-28-06, 12:06 AM		OOC: Just a question how many people here play KoL?
rampant

12-28-06, 12:14 AM		OOC: I don't even know what KoL stands for
----------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - *helping Sarah to the infirmary* Listen Sarah, far be it from me to tell you what to do, but I find flying is a lot easier when you let your wings move naturally. Now my melds are not just like real wings, closer to a spell or item, but I think maybe you should at least have a pillow or a mat or something.
Charles Phipps

12-28-06, 12:18 AM		Sigil

Kerrith: Ah, at last, Sigil.

Lilly: It looks just like Sharn.

Kerrith: SHUT UP!

:lop:

Lilly: Whose that?

Kerrith: Oh, it's the Lady of Pain!

Dorvos: I've heard of her. Don't pray to her!

:lop: ....

Lilly: Why? *fiddles with his longbow*

Dorvos: Because you'll be sentenced to the Mazes or Flayed alive!

Lilly: Really? Are the Mazes high in EXP?

:lop: ....

Dorvos: I don't know, probably. She's almost all powerful! No one dares attack her! Even gods fear her.

Lilly: Cool! That's even higher than the Mazes.

*fires at the Lady of Pain*

Dorvos: OH MY GOD!

:lop: *dies*

Kerrith: The Hell!

Lilly: Huh, she wasn't updated for 3rd addition. That arrow had a Saving throw vs. Fort to survive it. She must not have had a Fortitude score.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-28-06, 12:25 AM		OOC: I don't even know what KoL stands for
Kingdom of Loathing, a free stick figure online RPG.

OOKaizer: *holding a bat* What have we learned?

OOUrial: :weep: Don't use acronyms for non-D&D related things on the D&D message boards.
rampant

12-28-06, 12:31 AM		Dorvos - Hmmmmm

Kerrith - Yes leaving would ba good idea.

Lily - Hey where's my EXP!

Dorvos - Hmmmm

Izzy - CR more than 5 levels above us.

Lily - What a rip off!
Kaizer_Ryu

12-28-06, 01:28 AM		OOC: It's a bit late, but I just thought of this, so here it is anyway. A gesture of genuine kindness from sister to brother.

IC:

Terra: Hey, Rose.

Rose: Hmm?

Terra: I'm a bit late on this, but I wanted to give you a present for Dol Dornmas.

Rose: And here I thought you didn't like me. :P

Terra: :rolleyes: I found this a while back. I had almost forgotten about it till a few weeks ago. I want you to have it.

She hands him a small parcel. Upon opening it, he finds a ring. It looks like a wedding band.

Rose: :confused:

Terra: It was our mother's. I found it and my father's rings in the Temple of the Shadow on the Plane of Shadow before I turned it to rubble.

Rose: ...why would you give this to me? She was as much your mother as mine.

Terra: I've been rather nasty to you from time to time, so it's kind of an apology. But I also already have something to remember her by.

Rose: You found something else?

Terra: No. *places her hand over her heart* The scar she gave me has never gone away.

Rose: :confused: Scar?

Terra: She stabbed me in order to save me from a fate worse than the death she gave me. I wondered for years what the scar was. I thought it was a birth mark till I remembered what happened. That's my memento from her, so I give you this ring as your's.
rampant

12-28-06, 02:34 AM		Sithis - :dancin:

Gaz - What's he so happy about?

Tirmek - Him? He's just psyched about not being the new kid any more.
---------------------------------------------------

Elina - Hey, Sarah!

Tirmek - She's fine, a few concussions never stopped he before:rolleyes: , I need to head home.

Elina - Bye.

Momrnts later

Tirmek - (i.h.h. I think those two need some sister time, ... That and I want be well the frack away when she learns about Ivy)
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-28-06, 08:41 AM		13: Okay, making note: "Don't give Tirmek sugar." (pulls our bottle with the label "Distilled Essence of Aerith")
**********
Kitten and her grandparents emerge from a bar door in the Cogs of Sharn.

Kitten (looking around): Oh joy, we've emerged in the great underbelly of the beast. I give us two minutes before we encounter something horrible.

Two beings pass by, one an ogre, one a warforged. Both are wearing the uniforms of Sharn watchmen.

Kitten: :mymy: The watch never comes down this far!

Bruce: Yes, they were like that when I first came here, but I got the watch back in shape after a month. All it took were some flashy ninja skills learned from a group of extreme vigilanties in the mountains of Adar. *ahem*And some technology borrowed from House Cannith.

Kitten: Mmh, I bet there's still corruption.

Bruce: :rolleyes: That's what internal investigations and nosy reporters are for. And when all else fails there always seems to be a new crazy in a funny suit.
rampant

12-28-06, 11:23 AM		JJ - A-choo!

------------------------------------------------

Terra - Incarnum is the life force in all things , Artifice is the magic of ideas given form, and Blade magic is the convergance of the others a delicate dance dipping into the flow of creation.

Teiza - wow :OMG!
----------------------------------------------------

Dorvos is sitting by the portal, playing poker with mittens, and losing.

Dorvos - (i.h.h. hope the guys get here soon, I'm almost out of fish sticks here)
urial angel of death

12-28-06, 11:57 AM		:pol: appears behind Lilly.

Lilly: I thought I killed her.

Izzy: Hundreds of planescape fans all over the world refused to believe it and thus because belief creates power here she is.

Kerrith: She looks ******.

Chase scene involving various Scooby Doo gags all around Sigil.

Kerrith: Quick through this portal!

*on the other side*

Izzy: Won't she follow us?

Kerrith: Nope she can't pass through portals.

Izzy: So she's an all powerful being, but an open door stops her.

Kerrith: ...

Lilly: Where are we?

Kerrith: I would say... Hades. Well crap anyone know planeshift?

OOC: Please leave them in Hades for a bit I have something planned. Though I won't be able to get a comp until tomorrow.

P.S. Sorry for stepping on your turf Kaizer.
rampant

12-28-06, 12:28 PM		Dwooooooo - De - Dwoooooo - De - Dwoooooooooo

Kerrith - Ok he's a bard so him pulling a bagpipe out of thin air is one thing, what I want to know is where the decorations came from.

Izzy - Ain't no party like a dead man's party

Lily - Hot evil sorceress at 3 o' clock!

Said sorceress turns to talk to a ghast, revealing an acid eaten left half.

Lily - :twitch:
rampant

12-28-06, 04:21 PM		Terra - One quesion, why do want to learn shadow magic?

Teiza - Honestly, its because its one of the few things someone in my family doesn't already do. I love them, but I want to do something for myself.
------------------------------------

Lily - MOSHPIT!

Izzy - Hey somebo .. sombody spiked teh punch :pint:

Dorvos is playing on an outcropping of rock as the denziens and petitioners of the plane rock to the rythms.

Kerrith - Can they take anything seriously?
Kaizer_Ryu

12-28-06, 05:31 PM		P.S. Sorry for stepping on your turf Kaizer.
OOC: It's not my 'turf', I was just giving you crap again. :P :D

IC:

Elina: You need a focus.

Sarah: Why would I need a focus to bring out wings?

Elina: They don't really exist yet. You have to create them first. Once you do that, you won't need it anymore.

Sarah: What did you use?

Elina: Kitsune, what else?

Sarah: :raincloud Doesn't help me much.

Elina: I can only tell you what I did. The rest you've got to figure out on your own.

-----

Terra: Now, I want you to tell me the two fundamental principals of Shadow magic. Then, in your own words, tell me what it means in a practical sense.

Teiza: The principle of Sympathy: Like affects like. Normally, by gaining access to a doll or similar representation of the target, or gaining something that belonged to or was part of the target, a mage can control the target itself. For Shadow magic, this is taken further. By controlling the very shadow of the target, the caster gains control of their minds, souls, and bodies.

Terra: Meaning?

Teiza: Everything effects everything else in some way. The closer you are to what is being acted on, the more of an effect it has on you.

Terra: Good. Very good. Next one.

Teiza: The principle of Reflection: For every action, an equal and opposite reaction exists. It is commonly not visible, and often inconsequential. Shadow magic takes this ignored reaction and turns it into a potent weapon.

Terra: And what do you think that means?

Teiza: Every spell must come from somewhere, whether it be a Plane, a diety, or even the soul of a living being. The Shadowcaster uses this to their advantage. In many spells, the direct effect is not what is desired, but the indirect one.

Terra: :) Now, what are some examples of Shadow magic used by other schools?

Teiza: Darkness and related spells, illusions based on shadows, and the skills of the Shadowdancer.

Terra: And negative energy?

Teiza: The association between shadow and negative energies is incorrect. In the same way that evil and negative are considered one and the same, shadow is lumped with both. They are all considered 'dark'. While evil and negative energy have some common ground, with shadow, the association is merely mistaking the symbolic for the real. The two can be used in similar fashion, but they are wholly separate cosmic forces.

Terra: (i.h.h.) :D Three days! This kid is a freaking prodigy! :D (out loud) Let me just tell you right now. Often times, the workings of this branch of magic are so counterintuitive as to be incomprehensible to most. You are already farther than many students who attempt to study Shadow magic.

Teiza: :D :embarrass

Terra: But theory is one thing. Practice is another. Show me one of the funadmental mysteries (their version of a cantrip).

Teiza concentrates for a moment before starting a gesture.

Teiza: Liquid Night

A small amount of ink appears as she manifests the surrounding shadows. The celebration is short lived, however, as it keeps appearing.

Teiza: *anime sweatdrop* Uh...

Terra: Don't panic. Try dispelling it.

With another gesture, she stops the flow, but the pool of ink begins undulating.

Teiza: :mymy: I think I made it mad...

Ink spatters about the room, coating Teiza and Terra in a fine layer of black.

Teiza: *wipes ink off* Oops...

Terra: It's your first try. Don't worry about it. You'll get better.

With the help of a few Prestidigitation spells, the two clean up and return to Teiza's studies.
rampant

12-28-06, 05:39 PM		Teiza: :mymy: I think I made it mad...

LOL! Thats just LOL! kaizer, excellent use of smiley, have a :cookie:
rampant

12-28-06, 07:09 PM		Heading home

Sarah - All I'm asking is what makes a good focus?

Elina - I don't know, I just kinda did it.

Sarah - You're no help.

Elina - *opens the door* Oh....

Sarah - My....

Together - MOM!

Terra - Hi girls

Teiza - Hi Elina, Hi Sarah

Elina - What did you two do in here?

Sarah - Butcher a giant squid?

Teiza - Kalamari! :drool:
Kaizer_Ryu

12-28-06, 11:06 PM		Terra: You've done very well today, but I think that's enough for now.

Teiza: *disappointed* Ok...

Terra: *hands her a book* Take this. It's got puzzles of varying difficulty spread throughout. I want you to write out how you would go about solving these challenges with as little effort or disruption a possible. The less magic you can use, the better your score. I also reward for ingenuity.

Sarah: Oh, those...

Elina: I almost forgot about them.

Teiza: Bye! *runs off*

Terra: You look like you've got something on your mind.

Sarah: I'm trying to figure out how to get wings. Sis says I need a focus.

Elina: It's what worked for me. I had Kitsune help me out the same way she helped me manifest my Mindblade at first.

Terra: A focus, huh...? ............................... :plotting:

Elina: I am so out of here.

Sarah: Wait! You can't just leave m-! She's gone...

-----

On her demi-plane (I really should name it one of these days ;) ):

Terra: Right. I had an intriguing idea for a focus.

Sarah: Should I be worried?

Terra: Oh, hon, when have I given you cause to be worried?

Sarah: You got 'that' look again.

Terra: :embarrass Eh heh heh... Sorry. I can't help it sometimes.

Sarah: :nonono:

Terra: When you rage, you release your emotions and let it flood your body, creating a tremendous surge. What is required for your wings is a great deal of power focused into where they should be. Elina used Kitsune, you can funnel your rage.

Sarah: Easier said than done.

Terra: Which is why we came here. If you don't quite get it, you can focus on me without concern for collateral damage or anyone else getting in the way.

Sarah: Any suggestions?

Terra: How does it feel when you rage?

Sarah: I can feel my emotions coursing through my body. When I hit someone, it's like I'm funneling my fury through my hands. When I move, it's like it's flowing through my feet.

Terra: Perfect. Do you think you can you control where it's going? Even if it's only for a little bit?

Sarah: *the point dawns on her* I think so!

Terra: Here. *tosses a backless shirt at her* No point in ruining a perfectly good shirt.

*moments later*

Sarah: RrrrrRRRRAAAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

Terra: Focus!

The fury overtakes her and Sarah comes at her mother in full attack mode. After a few dodges and deflections, another idea strikes Terra. Instead of diverting the blows, she stands her ground, grabbing Sarah's fists when she strikes. The girl comes to a complete stop, wanting to continue forward but unable to push her mother out of the way or extricate herself from the grip.

Sarah: Let me go, Mother!

Terra: Your two main channels are steadied. Try diverting the pent up energy!

After a few moments, she complies, hoping that doing so would allow her to continue. The rush of battle demanded release. Concentrating as best she could, Sarah channeled the swirling energies towards her back. When she did so, it was almost as if instinct took over. The growth was sudden, but the direction the energies took just seemed...right. Beautiful angel wings sprouted from her back, the silver feathers shimmering as they moved. A tinge of red could be seen along the edge of each feather. The main part of the feathers seemed to change colors from different perspectives. When Sarah's wings were fully formed, Terra let go. She indulged her daughter's battle lust in the sky as well as the ground while Sarah adjusted to flying. After several crashes, she seemed to get the idea down. She wasn't the most graceful flyer yet, but that would come in time.

Terra: Well?

Sarah: :twitch: ...this...is the coolest...feeling...EVER! :D

As Sarah continued to practice, Terra watched and mused.

Terra: (i.h.h.) Their wings came out so different. Maybe it's just them and their differing physiologies, but maybe...just maybe...the wings manifest as a reflection of their mindset at the time. Elina was scared, grieveing, and in deep dispair. Sarah was excited and in the middle of a rage... Facinating.

With this, she absentmindedly placed a hand on her imperceptibly growing belly as she smiled. If they were anything, her children were certainly not boring.
rampant

12-28-06, 11:43 PM		Corre - Since Dorvos is on a trip, can I use his swords?

Satnak - Dorvos gets to use real weapons because he's proven he won't hurt himself with them.

Corre - Not fair! How did he do that!?

Satnak - By not bonking himself on the head with the fake ones.

Corre - Three times and you're branded for life!

Serene - If you want to use the real weapons, improve with the fake ones. Also don't think for a moment we'd love you any less if you never picked up a sword your whole life.

Corre - I know mom, i do this because I want to.
Charles Phipps

12-29-06, 12:42 AM		Kerrith: Okay, we're in Hades now and you're not allowed to advance....THE HELL!?

Lilly: YO!

Kerrith: What the hell are you wearing!?

Lilly: You mean all this green forrested cap, tunic, and elf shoes?

Kerrith: YES and what is with that giant bow!?

Lilly: Oh well, I saw a dragon and got him to switch classes for me.

Kerrith: You're a Ranger now?

Lilly: Oh hell no! I'm a Arcane Paladin with the Chosen of Boldrei abilities!

Kerrith: What's that do?

Lilly: It gives me the abilities of a ranger.

Kerrith: :Stare: WHAT IS THIS?! FORGOTTEN REALMS! YOU CANNOT BE TWO CLASSES FOR THE SAME LEVELS!

Lilly: Actually, it's more like three but that's beside the point.

Kerrith: You were already an Angel type thing!

Lilly: Oh that's just my Half-Celestial Template.

Kerrith: :twitch:

Lilly: Nature compensates for my low Wisdom with High Munchkin Score.

Bahamut: Remember, your Divine Rank levels are only temporary.

Lilly: Unless I get you a steady supply of rat tails. Gotcha.

Kerrith: And what the hell is with the Elf stuff?!

Lilly: Oh, since I was deciding to be Half-Celestial. I decided to also take Half-Elf.

Kerrith: YOU CAN'T SWITCH PARENTS!

Lilly: I just changed my character sheet with Rose Mage's help.

Rose Mage: He is an excellent apprentice.

Kerrith: Why are you wearing a dress?

Rose Mage: Uhhh Girdles of Feminity and Masculinity have a high AC bonus.

Kerrith: THEY DO NOT!

Lilly: My favored enemies; which stack in this template are Evil Outsiders, Half-Fiends, Rakashasas, and Tirmek.

Kerrith: God, someone keep him from the Epic Handbook.

Lilly: There's an Epic Handbook!?

Rose Mage: *Yoda voice* Not ready are you.

Lilly: YOU'RE HOLDING ME BACK! SOMEDAY I'LL BE MORE POWERFUL THAN ALL THE JEDI!

Kerrith: You as Anakin Skywalker is disturbingly appropriate.

Lilly: I think I'll go kill some children for Elina and whine about how its her fault.

Kerrith:.....*steps back*

Rose Mage: That's not very Elvish Lilly.

Lilly: Oh right, Nevermind.

Kerrith: He's become an Elfophile too.

Rose Mage: Killing his brother really screwed him up.

Lilly: ELVISH MUTHER****er! DO YOU SPEAK IT!?
rampant

12-29-06, 01:00 AM		Dorvos - Hmmm

Mittens - Mew (totally)

Lily - Not a chance Kid!

Izzy - If he's anything like his cousin you don't stand a chance Spoony jr.

Kerrith - Twenty gold on the spoony munchkin!
rampant

12-29-06, 03:19 AM		Tirmek - So Gaz, want a tour of the school?

Esbara - Wrong one cat boy, maybe, and this is just an excuse to stay far away from Elina for a bit.

Tirmek - *anime sweat drop*
----------------------------------

Ratslinky?
ratslinky

12-29-06, 04:09 AM		Gaz: Sure ive been dying to see it. I want to see the dueling arena's and the and the race course.

OORatslinky: Over to you Rampant
Phantomcrossing

12-29-06, 11:58 AM		In a forgotten kitchen, in a slum of Sharn, down near the cogs, a tall figure slaves over a stove trying to find something forgotten...no, taken from his mind. A sprinkle of spice later....

Norbaz: I've done it! I've rediscovered the recipe. I have it! I'm back to 10'alarms! The Chili' is back! Time to get on a Sivis station and head back to the Freedom. Ha! Time to pack.

The dilapidated door explodes in as men bearing the uniform and crest of the Sharn watch pour into the front half of the room.

Dwarf Watchman: Hold, in the Name of the Watch, the Assassin and known pirate conspirator Norbaz will turn himself over to our authority.

Norbaz: Sorry boys, can't leave with the stove on.

The half giant throws his pot from the oven towards the watch, it spatters on some and hits the floor, eating away at it and causing it to give way. Leaping over the falling guards and rolling out the door, the cooky smiles. Its good to be back in the game.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-29-06, 01:11 PM		Silver: NOW GET TO MAKING THE SMOOCHYFACE WITH ANDREA!
DungeonJman

12-29-06, 01:55 PM		*finally gets out of the box*

OODungeonJ: Wait a minute...

*realizes he's still got his paladin stuff from when he went into Eberron*

OODungeonJ: :headexplo YOU FOOLS! YOU'VE DISRUPTED THE NATURAL ORDER!!!

OODungeonJ: Oh and just because Lilly doesn't have access to the Epic Level Handbook, doesn't mean that i don't.

*draws out sword*

OOPaulon: Oh come on! What else did you keep!

OODungeonJ: This:

*Begins chasing OOPaulon around while attempting to use Great Smiting on him*

OOPaulon: This can't be legal!

OODungeonJ: You broke the laws of nature in this case and have done a couple of evil things on the boards. Since i'm going strictly by the book in this case, it's legal.
rampant

12-29-06, 02:24 PM		Gaz - Good sweet kybher! is this a school or a city?!

Tirmek - Meh, one half dozen of the other.

Esbara - Is that an Arena?

Tirmek - Yes, lets go before-gk

Vedris - Hey punk lets see what you got!

Esbara - Ooooooh! This I gotta see.

Vedris - I should have known a Rakshasa scumwad like you would be building a harem, does Sarah know you're putting the moves on the new girl.

Gaz - Jeeze, lady get to the smackdown, and get your mind out of the gutter.

Tirmek - Shows what you know, It's female Rakshasa that build harems. Combo elimination 4 hits, with a x6 point multiplier.

Vedris - You're bluffing devil.

Tirmek - I'm setting parameters now. If you back out you won't lose any points.

Vedris - Bring it fuzzy!
-----------------------------------------

Tirmek - (i.h.h. damn i should have known she wouldn't be reckless enough to challenge me near an arena she wouldn't have an edge in)

The field consists of a mostly flat area with narrow crevasses weaving through it.

Tirmek - (She's a better flyer than me, I'm gonna have to do something sneaky)
rampant

12-29-06, 03:03 PM		Tirmek's mind

What would Sarah do?

Sarah - RARRRRRRRRRRRRRR

POWNAGE!

Vedris - OH NOES I ARE SCREWED!

What would Elina do?

Elina - *call lightning*

Lightning blade pownage

Vedris - OH NOES I ARE CRISPY!

...
...
...
I need more friends
-------------------------------------------

Vedris - Hah!

A beam of green energy slices down from above

Tirmek - *dodge*

As the beam trikes ground it scatters into several smaller beams each tipped with a translucent rapier.

Tirmek - *block* gragh *stabbedx2*
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-29-06, 03:31 PM		Tirmek: Maybe I need to expand my examples. Okay, what would Bunny do?

Bunny: Well, for starters I wouldn't challenge anyone to a fair fight. :bored:

Tirmek: What are you doing here? :confused: No one's going to die.

Bunny: Oh, I wouldn't say that……
*********
Meanwhile, deep below the arena in a secret tunnel:

Cliché Villain Rakshasa: Soon my minions will have dug up into the heart of the island, then I will take it over and then………THE WORLD! :evillaugh

*rumble*

CVR: What's that noise that is interrupting my carefully coreographed monologue?!

*CRACK*

The CVR looks up to see a stactite shake and then fall.

CVR: But's it doesn't have the holy ability!

It's a BIG freakin' stalactite. DR doesn't protect you from massive damage. Plus the rest of the ceiling is also caving in.

CVR: *whimper*
rampant

12-29-06, 04:14 PM		Tirmek - I was trying to bluff her down! She stinks at combo, and the multiplier was supposed to scare her, lousy day to not have any flight melds.

Bunny - Thats gonna hurt.

Tirmek - TERRA DAMMIT!

Vedris has conjured a mass of black tentacles each one tipped with a fammiliar translucent blade.

Tirmek - :mymy:...RUN AWAY!
---------------------------------------

Esbara - :rofl:

--------------------------------------

Tirmek - Ok no more mr. nice guy. *call net* *toss*

Vedris - Hah! missed mehack!

Vedris struggles to escape the grip of a small astral construct that had hidden in the net.

Tirmek - Finish it!

Astral Construct - *headbutx4*

Tirmek - Ok you lose Vedris.

Vedris (finally dislodging the construct and dispelling it) - hate you!
-----------------------------------

Gaz - (sipping a smoothie) Why didn't you do that earlier?

Tirmek - (nibbling on a taco) Vedris knows she has an advantage in the air, she likes to keep her distance, I had to wait for her to get close enough.

Esbara - What about the race Tracks?

Tirmek - They're under construction right now. The practice course is open though.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-29-06, 06:41 PM		Tirmek - TERRA DAMMIT!
Terra: Achoo.

13: That's why the rest of us don't let our names out.
Paulon

12-29-06, 06:50 PM		*finally gets out of the box*

OODungeonJ: Wait a minute...

*realizes he's still got his paladin stuff from when he went into Eberron*

OODungeonJ: :headexplo YOU FOOLS! YOU'VE DISRUPTED THE NATURAL ORDER!!!

OOPaulon: I thought that was the point of the Forgotten Freedom?

OODungeonJ: Oh and just because Lilly doesn't have access to the Epic Level Handbook, doesn't mean that i don't.

*draws out sword*

OOPaulon: Oh come on! What else did you keep!

OODungeonJ: This:

*Begins chasing OOPaulon around while attempting to use Great Smiting on him*

OOPaulon: This can't be legal!

OODungeonJ: You broke the laws of nature in this case and have done a couple of evil things on the boards. Since i'm going strictly by the book in this case, it's legal.

OOPaulon: I didn't know the Son of Spoony had a long lost twin brother. :P

OOPaulon: Point the first...

*dodges a swing of the sword*

It's your equipment, so any imbalance caused by it is your fault.

*ducks under a slash at his head*

Point the second...

*throws a book at the sword, deflecting it*

I transported you home at your own request, so any imbalance is your responsibility.

*parries the sword with an umbrella*

Point the third...

There are no rules on the Forgotten Freedom other than the Captain's List, so trying to punish me for breaking rules, especially when the actions were at your request is a chaotic act...

*puff of logic, revoking DungeonJman's Paladinhood*

Point the fourth...

*doesn't bother to dodge the swing as the sword crumbles to dust*

Your unstable gear was only held together here by your Paladininess, which is now gone by your own actions, at least until you atone.

*watches as the rest of DungeonJman's gear crumbles to dust, leaving him dressed only in underwear marked with Hello Kitty logos*

Ugh. I didn't need to see that. Don't let Kanatash or Caralot see you in those.

*vanishes in a cheshire cat fashion, grin last* :D
rampant

12-29-06, 07:48 PM		OORampant - :rolleyes: Quiet down or I'll start another E.B.N.E. fight, and this time it'll be amored core:D
--------------------------------------------------------------

Gaz - This is a practice track?

Tirmek - Yeah you can sign up for lessons here, the practice skiffs are little on the boring side, but they can take a hit better than the racing models. The season is over for the official races though, on the other hand it means there's more tracks open for teaching. Of course you have to be approved and pass the entrance exam.

Esbara - Ulp
ratslinky

12-29-06, 07:55 PM		Gaz: So what are the rules for racing :plotting:

Esabar: Sometimes your more evil than me :nonono:

OORatslinky: Over to you Rampant. And as you can see its Esabar not Esbara. But if Esbara sounds better then meh I don't care I was just giving them any name I could think of.
Charles Phipps

12-29-06, 08:01 PM		Hades

Elminster: HELLO LAD!

Lilly: GAH! Who are you!?

Elminster: I'm you 900 years from now.

Lilly: WHAT!?

Elminster: Yes, if you don't change your twinky ways then you'll become a dirty old man with a dozen classes that everyone hates as the GMPC of the setting.

Lilly: NO!

Eliminster: Ya can't be chosen of TWO gods lad!

Lilly: Why do I even have a fake Scottish accent!?

Elminster: I don't know! There's not even a Scotland in the Realms!

***

Aerith: Do you think this will work?

Rose: Just as long as he doesn't mention the upsides.

***

Elminster: On the plus side there is the sex with goddesses...

Lilly: Wait...
Kaizer_Ryu

12-29-06, 08:03 PM		Tirmek's mind

What would Sarah do?

Sarah - RARRRRRRRRRRRRRR

POWNAGE!

Vedris - OH NOES I ARE SCREWED!

What would Elina do?

Elina - *call lightning*

Lightning blade pownage

Vedris - OH NOES I ARE CRISPY!

...
...
...
I need more friends
:rofl: LOL!!! Thanks, rampant. I needed that.

IC:

Sarah: *lands* *pant* *wheeze* This is...harder than it looks.

Elina: You're concentrating too much on the physical part of flying. You'll only wear yourself out as well as lose mobility.

Sarah: :confused: There's more?

Elina: Three parts for us, actually. You've seen what Mom can do. 90%of it would be impossible if she only used her actual wings.

Sarah: *nods and listens intently*

Elina: By tapping into the Astral Plane, we can defy gravity with ease. That is one of the two ways Mom is able to merely hover, the other being her Psionic abilities. The third is our connection to shadows. By maintaining the link between ourselves and our shadow during the day, and the darkness around us during the night, we can move with near impunity.

Sarah: Wow... How'd you figure all that out?

Elina: :rolleyes: I asked.

Sarah: *anime sweatdrop* :embarrass Eh heh...

Elina: Want some help getting the hang of it? :devil:

Sarah: *even larger anime sweatdrop*
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

12-29-06, 08:07 PM		(OOC: Of corse Elminster is Scottish, Scots are best at everything. ;)
Ironic Eled: well, apart form, uh, spelling... )
Kaizer_Ryu

12-29-06, 08:09 PM		Elminster: On the plus side there is the sex with goddesses...

Lilly: Wait...
Lilly: So the choices are: 1.) Be the chosen of two dieties, have sex with goddesses, but be a dirty old man everyone hates, or 2.) be the chosen of only one diety, somehow win back the love of my darling Elina, apparently saving the world at the same time, be loved by everyone but Tirmek who doesn't matter-

-----

Tirmek: Ah-choo.

-----

Lilly: -and only have to downgrade to having sex with an overly hot and probably less demanding near quasi-diety?

Elminster: Well...I guess you could put it that way...
rampant

12-29-06, 08:26 PM		Tirmek - Well its pretty simple get on, figure out the start and end points, and go for it. You're allowed to smash, crash, shoot at, and other wise harrass the other driver with impunity, unless of course its a restricted match or a special rules match. The Skifes themselves are chunks of chunks of crystal, honed and infused for this purpose, the Skife lanes are the real marvel, Living Deep Crystal Its resonance is what keeps the skifes up. The drivers are the ones who control the direction, if a skife or even a shard stops recieving data it immediately slows down to a stop. The lanes go all over the Island, a few commercial lanes are marked for racers in the slow hours, Like Kahuna Drop, mostly though we're encouraged to use the race lanes and sims in the arcades.
rampant

12-29-06, 09:10 PM		Zella - The longer you put it off the worse it gets.

Ivy - I know, but she'll skin me alive now!

Zella - There are worse things
------------------------------------
Kithle - Ahchoo

13 - Ah-choo
Kaizer_Ryu

12-29-06, 11:57 PM		Elina: *flying* You understand the concepts?

Sarah: *also flying* Yeah.

Elina: Ready to start trying them out in real time?

Sarah: Yeah.

Elina: :devil: Good. *manifests mindblade* Hellpyre!

Sarah: :eek: *dodge* WTF?!

Elina: Don't lose focus. Light Spear!

Sarah: *dodge* Why are you ripping off moves from Tales of Symphonia?!

Elina: Lightning Blade! Super Lightning Blade!

Sarah: *singed* :mad: *coughs out smoke* That combo is so cheap.

Elina: Then stop whining and use what I taught you. Demon Spear!

Sarah: :eek:

About a minute later, Sarah is on the ground.

Sarah: That was mean!

Elina: I'm keeping you on your toes.

Sarah: I'm just getting used to this! Did you have to do the Super Combo?!

(OOC: Demon Fang, Sonic Thrust, Lightning Blade, Light Spear Canon, Hell Pyre. Rinse, repeat, wipe hands on pants. Uber pwnage)

Elina: Yes. :P Now get up and let's try again.

They both take off again.

Elina: Ready?

Sarah: Yep.

Elina: Sword Rain Beta!

Sarah: :eek: LAME! *dodge* No fair changing character skills!

Elina: If you're expecting it, it's not keeping you on your toes. Holy Lance!

Sarah: Son of a-!

Moments later, she is again on the ground.

Sarah: You're enjoying this, aren't you?

Elina: :devil: You know it. But you'd better get moving.

Sarah: Why?

Elina: I call upon thee in the land of the dead to unleash thy fury of thunder!

Sarah: :eek: OH SHI-! :eek: :help:

Elina: Indignation!

*about an hour later*

Sarah: I got it, ok! You can stop now!

Elina: Why would I? This is so much fun!

Sarah: It's bordering on cruelty!

Elina: Older sister's prerogative. :P Dodge the next one and we're done. Is that ok?

Sarah: ...fine.

Elina: Infinite Powers, grant me thy strength!

Sarah: Oh, you've gotta be kidding me!

Elina: Meteor Storm!

Sarah: Mutha-!

-----

Elina: Ok, you did very well. Just keep practicing.

Sarah: *singed and covered in dirt* :mad: :pbbbtt: Hate you. *walks off*

Elina: That was fun. :devil:

OOKazier: *cowering off to the side* Are we even then...?

Elina: *pulls out DM breaker 2.5* For the moment. :evillaugh
rampant

12-30-06, 12:37 AM		Corre - I'm Bored!

Serene - Oh surely there must be something you can find to amuse yourself.

Satnak - Too late! Come on then we got laundry to do.

Corre - :yuck:
------------------------

Serene - Seriously though, we need to find an activity for her beyond the routine, especially now that Dorvos has started adventuring and Teiza spends so much time practicing her shadow magic.

Satnak - Well, I may have a solution.

Serene - Well?

Satnak - Corre is smart, artistic, and athletic. She tends to get bored quickly if all three aren't being put to use. Maybe we should accelerate her training.

Serene - Well She does seem to like fighting:( .

Satnak - No, what she enjoys is the game, the art of fighting. She doesn't like to hurt people, or put herself at risk. She's actually more like you than me.
Crystalforged

12-30-06, 01:37 AM		OOCrystalforged: Hmmm...

OOKanatash: Well, come on, spit it out already.

OOCrystalforged: (sigh) Yeah, I got nothing.

OOKanatash: COME ON! Are you telling me you don't have a single, evil, sanity destroying idea in that twisted little head of ours!?

OOCrystalforged: Well I've got a few things but they all involve Kitten so...

OOKanatash: You know you really can't say anything about that.

OOCrystalforged: I know, it would be WAY to hipocritical to say anything about having to wait on OOCat when I took so freaking long to finish up with Kitten.

OOKanatash: Sooooooo.... What now?

OOCrystalforged: (shrug) I don't know, maybe a little Wii Sports?\

OOKanatash: You're still not going to let me play Twilight Princess are you?

OOCrystalforged: No.

OOKanatash: Meh, I got nothing better to do.

OOCrystalforged: You know I've noticed you seem to have mellowed quite a bit as the storyline has progressed. In the old days having nothing to do was an excuse to torment redshirts or play mind games with the crew.

OOKanatash: True, but the thing is that now the random acts of violence just seem... Oh I don't know random and pointless.

OOCrystalforged: Damn, that almost sounds like you're developing a conscience. That can't be good.

OOKanatash: I didn't think of it that way... You're right that is rather disturbing. I mean its been ages since I tortured anyone.

OOCrystalforged: If its any consolation you really haven't had anyone worth using your best stuff on for a while since there aren't very many people left that are stupid enough to go up against the crew and if you aren't going to bring the A-game whats the point?

OOKanatash: True, that does make me feel better but the idea of me growing a conscience still creeps me out.

OOCrystalforged: What about the other crew, why haven't you been messing with them?

OOKanatash: Oh, you know how prickly all their entities have gotten, really hate to have their toes stepped on. I know if I mess with them there will be retributions and you just haven't come up with anything lately to make those retributions worth while. Maybe I should look into getting involved with some of the Kid's plots.

OOCrysalforged: I don't know, like you just said, the entities have gotten kinda prickly. I just don't know if I could depict them correctly, and character developement has never been my strength. I have enough trouble doing that with Kitten as is.

OOKanatash: True, true, so what now.

OOCrystalforged: I don't know, we could just type out this conversation we've been having, let them see what the bounces around in our head I suppose.

OOKanatash: I don't know, sounds rather boring.

OOCrystalforged: (shrug) I've got nothing better and I hate to just dissipear for long periods of time.

OOKanatash: Fine, go for it. You know you really need to come up with a plotline again. You're one with Kitten hardly counts since it was so sporatic and it been ages before that since you had anything resembling a plot.

OOCrystalforged: I guess I'll try but I'm kinda like OOCat that way, plot-impaired, maybe we need a new Smash Brothers thing or something similar along those lines. Those are always fun.

OOKanatash: As long as you don't make me be Ness again, don't get me wrong its a good game, but I want to chose my own character next time.

OOCrystalforged: Sure, whatever. Now we should probably stop rambling and go get some sleep.

OOKanatash: Fine, night.
rampant

12-30-06, 03:27 AM		OOC: What about Aero and Miko?
---------------------------------------

Terra - ...

Terrek - (pathing) Ok Terra you don't like me, fine, it doesn't change the fact that I'm Teiza's grandfather. You're practically her aunt, for her sake lets just leave at the door.

Terra - (chicken pants) fine

Teiza - I think I know what I did wrong with the ink. I'm not setting the parameters correctly for the initial cast.

Terra - Thats good Teiza, but the assignment was-

Teiza - too easy. (holds up the papers) I even did some extra.

Terra - ... Your answer to world hunger was to make gnomes taste better.
--------------------------------------------------

Pholly is in the infirmary being treated for multiple bite wounds.

Pholly - The eyes were the worst part! Staring right through me!
Charles Phipps

12-30-06, 08:05 AM		OOC: Let's see if I can get the Craziest EB award again...

IC:

Forgotten Freedom
Deck

Kanatash: ....I sense a presence I have not felt for...

Elvis: I, the Lord of Xoriat appear to you.....baby.

Kanatash: THE KING!

Elvis: You have been negligent oh my chosen servant.

Kanatash: But I've just been so happy that I've ceased to believe humans need to be tormented. I mean....look at what they do to each other without my prompting.

Elvis: You have forgotten the Path of Madness. So I'm afraid I'm going to have to show you the reason for it again. THREE reasons.

Kanatash: ....Not...THE TRIALS.

Elvis: You betcha.

Kanatash: Please! Anything but that!

Elvis: First, the first person to get 1,000 gibbering insane with horror gets a copy of Twilight Princess!

Kanatash:....okay, I'll do it.

Ketler: *has hockey mask, scapels, and a apron* IT'S MINE!

Kanatash: I'd like to claim credit for that one.

Elvis: Sorry baby.

Kanatash: Blast!

Elvis: The next reason is King Steve is starting to make Xoriat look pale by comparison. Do you know what that means?

Kanatash: Uhhh...

Elvis: We're the opposite of the mortal realm. If we don't cause more nonsensical craziness and horror then the rule of belief will make us into....something else.

Kanatash: Hippies like my parents.

Elvis: Do you understand?

Kanatash: What's the current status?

Elvis: We've already got people becoming....elves.

Kanatash: The Complete Book of Elves. *shudder*

Elvis: Leogolas fiction is raining from the sky. Now, no one wants you to be an Anti-Tanisite but raising some bigotry against half-elves would also score you some points.

Kanatash: What's the third reason?

Elvis: We'll rip off your skin and flay you for a thousand years before wearing your eyes as we explore your pores with our obscene genitalia for untold aeons.

Kanatash:.....I forgot you people are really scary.

Elvis: To prove your worth, we're also assigning you a crew to help with this.

Kanatash: Oh no.

Elvis: The First is the Chaos Knight Michael whom has reached middle age and finally gone completely spoony. He's even changed his last name to Garland. We think he's trying to be more feminine to win Evil Princess Lisa back.

Michael: COOKIES!

Elvis: The second is Pirate Chance Random.

Chance: Yarrr.

Kanatash: Oh hell. I'm in an 8bit parody, which is already a parody!

Elvis: The third is Drizzt Do'Urden.

Kanatash: NO THE :censored: way! No :censored: way am I bringing that mother :censored: twink along!

Drizzt: *brood* forced to work with evil *brood*

Elvis: Finally, that Vampire we forgot about who used to be onboard. we'll just rename him Lestat.

Lestat: Ummmm, which way is the LARP dressing room dudes?

Kanatash: And if I don't accomplish this task with these losers slowing me down?

Elvis: After we're done with the orbs, you'll be locked in a break room with these four....for all eternity and no ability to harm them.

Kanatash: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

***

Later
The King's Citadel

Kanatash: Alright, I have to drive King Steve even MORE crazier and make his evil part of Xoriat's influence.

King Steve: Why hello!

Garland: HELLO!

King Steve: Would you like to come to my kick ass rumpus room?

Garland: WOULD I!?

King Steve: But first you must bark like a dog.

Kanatash: He is a servant of the powers of darkness! He's not going to...

Garland: WOOF!

Kanatash: Oh hell....

King Steve: Come on in. Breakfast first. It's WAFFLE TIME!

Garland: A meal that costs my dignity is still free.

***

Later Still
King Steve's Kickass Cafeteria

Garland: MMmmmmm waffles.

Kanatash: This is not evil.

Garland: Oh, waffles, how you seduce me with you eggoey wicked delights? How ever can I make this please more sinful? Oh yes...MOLASSES.

*Michael pours HUGE amounts of syrup on his waffles*

Kanatash: .......okay that's just fricking creepy. King Steve, I must now drive you mad!

*King Steve's shoes start crying*

King Steve: Oh, my baby shoes are crying.

Kanatash: Baby...shoes?

King Steve: Made from real babies! Fresh daily! Can't you just hear their cute little screams as I walk.

Kanatash: :OMG:

Garland: They must be the softest shoes on Earth!

King Steve: Like a babies' behind...except without the shavit.

Garland: You're awesome.

King Steve: So what were you going to say?

Kanatash: :shudder: Nevermind.

***

Over in Thrane

Pontiff Jaela: La La La la....coming back from sex with my husband.

Garland: BWHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Kanatash: HA! I've come to corrupt you to evil.

Pontiff Jaela: Uncle Kanatash! How sweet to see you again.

*hug*

Kanatash: Oh Gods.

Garland: Little did you realize that you were lured here by our SIXTH DARK WARRIOR!

Aerith: Hey guys!

Kanatash:.....Michael, did you invite a FRIGGING SOLAR DEVA to join our group?

Michael: Why? Is that wrong?

Kanatash: YOU DAMN RIGHT IT'S WRONG!

Aerith: Vegetarian burritos for everyone! Plus cola!

Lestat: I never drink.....cola.

*Kanatash turns around, Jaela is now in a loin cloth, black bikini top, and has a HUGE cape*

Kanatash: GAH!

Evil Pontiff Jaela: Obviously, I'll have to show you how to run an evil Empire!

Kanatash: IT DOESN'T COUNT IF YOU DO IT!

Garland: She's awesome...*whispers* but kind of scary too. I'm not afraid though. There's nothing I'm afraid of though, except Forest Flumps.

Kanatash: Lawful Good Creatures with No Attack method....from FIRST EDITION?

Garland: Well...

Flumps: BOOGIIE BOOGIEE!

Garland: *SCREAMS LIKE A LITTLE GIRL*

Kanatash: :twitch:

***

Over in Aundair
VERY later

Kanatash: At last we've turned Aundair's Queen to Stone! Now we'll dissolve her in acid.

Garland: I've got the Mountain Dew right here.

Kanatash:.....

Lestat: I never drink....Mountain Dew. Jolt, yes. Mountain Dew, no.

Drizzt: *Brood* Oh woe. Dark Elfishness.

Kanatash: HOW ARE WE GOING TO DISSOLVE HER IN MOUNTAIN DEW!?

Garland: Well acid would be messy and....needlessly violent. Mountain Dew is there if she gets thirsty....

Kanatash: SHE CAN'T GET THIRSTY! SHE'S STONE! AHHhhhhhh! This day couldn't get any worse!

Peasant: You've turned the Queen to Stone!

Kanatash: YES! BEHOLD THE HEIGHT OF MY...

Peasant: HIP HIP HOORAY! HIP HIP HOORAY!

Kanatash:....

Peasant: DING DONG THE :censored: IS DEAD! Which old :censored:?

Aerith: The Wicked :censored:!

Garland: WAKE UP YOU SLEEPY HEAD!

*claps hands as hordes of blue clothes wearing townsfolk get out of their houses and start to celebrate around Kanatash*

Lestat, Chance, and Drizzt: CLAP YOUR EYES! GET OUT OF BED! THE WICKED :censored: IS DEAD!

Kanatash: :twitch: :twitch: :twitch:

***

Xoriat

Daelkyr: How long until he completely snaps back to his old self?

Elvis: Wait for it....

***

Seconds Later

Garland: I guess you've become the Spoony Psionicist Kanatash.

Kanatash: *snapping noise*
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-30-06, 08:40 AM		OOC: Charles gets another :looloo:.
Sarah: :confused: There's more?
Silver: Sure: chicks dig wings.

Sarah: You know I'm into……well…Tirmek.

Silver: He's half-chick.
Satnak - No, what she enjoys is the game, the art of fighting. She doesn't like to hurt people, or put herself at risk. She's actually more like you than me.
Bunny: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
***********
OOcat: Ah, Kanatash, I have a way to save you.

Kanatash: :twitch:

OOcat: There's a new team of evil forming, and we need a world-destroying horror from some other plane of existence.

Kanatash: :weep: So happy.

OOcat: I'll take that as a yes. Anyway, meet your new comrades. Tell us about yourselves.

Errandis: Well, I camehome from a hard day of ordering terrorist attacks upon Karrnath to find that my son had been crushed beneith invincible furniture by a bunch of serial-murdering psychopaths. I tried laying the smackdown on them, but that Kithle used his magnificent legalese to remove my soul from the Earth orb—that I stole from the Aerenal a long time ago—where I'd stashed it and got that steel-headed Stupid to stick it back in me with his sword. Nalfein then proceeded to torch my bony ass.

Kanatash: Hold on: in the original Black Mage had to drag you down to Hell.

Errandis: Helloo? I'm a walking pile of hydrocarbons nicely dried out by the cold northern air! I go up like tinder! And I'll have you know that bone burns at a high enough temperature, like Fireball hot.

Kanatash: Wait, if they burned you how are you here?

Errandis: Well, they only torched my ass. (bends over) See?

Kanatash: :gah:
rampant

12-30-06, 01:03 PM		Back on the FF

Gaz - :gel:

Tirmek - I am so sick of carrying you!

Sara - (hovering above) Need some help?

Tirmek - (looks around) yes, Sarah where are you-ahhhhh

Sarah - Calm down! I got you.

Tirmek - Whose got you!

Sarah - No one, I finally got this flying thing down.

Tirmek - My shoulder chakra thanks you.
------------------------------------------------------------

After dropping Gaz/Esabar off at e's quarters.

Sarah - Elina wants to know why your avoiding her, if its about the whole promise breaker thing i will so drop you.

Tirmek - Acyually I've been picking up some wierd vibes from Ivy, I think somethings up and I don't Elina will like it. In fact I'm pretty sure someone's gonna end up skinned alive over this.

Sarah - Any Idea what's going down?

Tirmek - Not really, thats all I can do for now. Too many variebles on this ship to begin with and clairsentience powers are kind of limited till you get to the really big stuff.
Crystalforged

12-30-06, 01:57 PM		Kanatash: :twitch: (trembling)

OOCrystalforged: Uh-Oh, I think you made him mad...

Kanatash: I don't get mad. I get even. (ports out)

OOCrystalforged: ...This won't end well.

---

King Steve's throne room

Kanatash: Hello Steve.

King Steve: I-

Kanatash: Yeah, just let me cut you off right there. I know you're crazy enough that anything subtle I try won't phaze you in the least so I just have to try something un-suble.

*One bigby's tactical nuke later*

King Steve: Wow my nuclear program must be coming along well.

Kanatash: Hm, I was afraid of that. Well only one course left. (pulls out Kelter's dimesional reciever and opens a portal) Alright, in you go. Now he's the entities problem.

---

Somewhere in Ashland, Kentucky

King Steve: Hello.

Charles: AAAUGH!

---

Back with his fellow Dark Warriors

Kanatash: Alright now its your turn. I think Micheal/Garland can be first.

Garland: First for what? Are you giving us presents?

Kanatash: :smirk: Well, I might call them that...

---

Kanatash: (eyeing the Aurla statue) Someone get me a stone mason and a scroll of stone to flesh.

*much "cosmetic surgery" later*

Kanatash: (looking at what is now the uglies brawd you have ever seen) She always did like her pretty face. Alright someone bring her back to life and ship her back to her subjects. They should be "happy" to see her.

---

Several hours later. Several hours that involved many sharp pointy objects and genetalia.

Garland: Iiiiieeeee!!!!!

Kanatash: Now now, its not so bad. Its not like you were using them anyways. Here, let me make it up to you. (pulls out girldel of of Masculinity/Femininity)

Michele: Huh? What just happened?

Kanatash: I probably just did you a favor you know, you actually have a better shot with Lisa now.

---

Kanatash: (staring at Drizzit) Hm... (snaps his fingers) Got it. Here. (hands him a prescription of Prozac) Feel better?

Drizzit: Indeed I do. I have realized all the good things I have going for me in this life.

Kanatash: Good, good. Now you stay here, I'll be right back. (ports out)

*a short time later*

Kanatash: (ports back in carrying the heads of two humans, a halfling, and a dwarf) Hello again.

Drizzit: Wulfgar! Bruenor! Regis! Catti-brie! How could you?!

Kanatash: It wan't hard, despite their abilities they always seem to require you to come in and save them but since you never showed up...

Drizzit: You monster!

Kanatash: Flattery will get you everywhere. Now just to pour salt in the wound, I've just killed everyone you loved in this world, however thanks to that medication I gave you you still feel undeniable happy don't you?

Drizzit: :ghosted:

---

Kanatash: (Sizing up Lestat) Well the Prozac trick won't work twice so I think prodigeous amounts of booze are called for here.

*five minutes later*

Lestat: (slurring) He-hey this ish a gweat place here you knows shat? I, I like loves you man, like reallys loves you. Gods, I'msh sloshed. (falls down)

Kanatash: You'd think for one of the undead he'd be able to hold his rum better. Of course maybe I shouldn't have used that leftover Hellbrew too... Ah well. With the psionic suggestions I implanted in his mind he should be an alchoholic after this, or alchohol poisoning will kill him, either way one less emo in the world.

---

Kanatash: (glancing in the direction of Aerith and Jeala) Yeah, **** that. I learned long ago not to even try with those two. Besides I've got bigger fish to fry.

---

Somewhere in Xoriat

Kanatash: (porting in) Hello.

Elvis: What are you doing here?!

Kanatash: Dropping off the orbs for one, Without those idiots I just ported where I needed to be with them. (holds out a sheet of paper) Sign here for the delivery

Elvis: (signs) Uh, good work. I think. Well you should be getting back now shouldn't you?

Kanatash: Oh no. We have some unfinished business you and I. (snaps his fingers)

OOKanatash: Now we can begin. Lets see for starters...

Elvis suddenly finds himself in the body of a gerbil.

Elvis: Whats going on?! You can't do this to me, I'm the King baby!

OOKanatash: Actualy, you're not anymore. That paper you signed what for a legal name change, I had Reman draw it up. Your name is now Lemmiwinks.

Lemmiwinks: What are you going to do to me?

OOKanatash: :schemes: Who me? I won't do anything to you. We're just going to have a little lesson in action and reaction. Now what do you think is gonna happen when I introduce the element of the gerbil to the endothermic heat of Dooj's ass? Well lets see. (inserts a glass tube up Dooj's behind and sends Lemmiwinks sliding down it)

Lemmiwinks: NOOOOOoooooooooo...

Dooj: Dude! Jeala Christ! AAH!

---

Lemiwinks is now in Dooj's lower intestines. The skeleton of another Gerbil lies nearby. He tries to get back out but OOKanatash removes the tube and the sphincter snaps shut. Suddenly the ghostly figure of a frog wearing a crown appears.

Frog King: Lemmiwinks, you must find a way out of this place, or you will surely die. This way has been closed off by the Great Sphincter. To escape you must journey upward to the dark reaches of the intestine and past the stomach.

Lemmiwinks: :mymy:

Frog King: Who am I? Just a friend. Heed my words, Lemmiwinks. Your time is running out. Make for the large intestine. All will be made clear then. (he dissapears)

Lemmiwinks: :twitch:

---

Kanatash: My work is done here.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-30-06, 02:13 PM		OOC: Unfortunately, Crystalforged, there's a difference between crazy and gross.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-30-06, 02:42 PM		OOC: Fine, rampant, I get the hint.

I know, shocking isn't it? ;)

IC:

Elina: IVY! *TACKLE HUG*

Ivy: GAH! Oh, hi Elina.

Elina: 'Oh, hi'? That's it?

Ivy: Uh...you just caught me off guard, I guess.

Elina: Well? Aren't you going to say anything more?

Ivy: (i.h.h.) I may very well die...again...if this goes badly. Gotta use the ol' Bluff and Diplomacy skills. (out loud) Well, I never did say how much I think your wings suit you. *Diplomacy*

Elina: *giggle*

Ivy: *rolls Natural 20 on Spot check* But...uh...why are you wearing that?

He finally notices she is wearing a black dress that, on a full grown woman, would be considered rather provacative. Physically being only ten years old, it's intensely creepy on her.

Elina: You like it? I thought you would.

Ivy: (i.h.h.) Yep, I'm gonna die. (out loud) Isn't that a little...much?

Elina: *pouts* I had it made with you in mind.

Ivy: (i.h.h.) Life...flashing before my eyes. (out loud) Well, I'm very flattered, but what about your parents? Wouldn't they have something to say about you dressing this way? *fails Diplomacy check by less than 5*

Elina: So? If I don't want to be treated like a child, I have to stop acting like one. I'm making my own decisions.

Ivy: Elina...we're friends, right?

Elina: :( Only friends?

Ivy: (i.h.h.) And here's the tunnel... (out loud) For the sake of argument, can we just say friends for now?

Elina: ...all right. Yes, we are friends.

Ivy: And friends tell each other when they think they're making a mistake, right?

Elina: What is that supposed to mean?!

Ivy: (i.h.h.) Light...at the end...sooooo pretty... (out loud) *cringe* I'm just saying that...uh...um...dressing like that will only attract people like Ketler! *Bluff*

Ketler: :drool: :love:

Elina: :eek: OH MY MOM! You're right! Flame Sphere!

Ketler: MY LIFE IS PAIN!

Ivy: So...maybe you should get changed into something more...approprate? *Diplomacy*

Elina: Oh, you are such a sweetheart, looking out for me like that! *KISS*

Ivy: Mmmmph! :eek: (i.h.h.) This won't end well...

Elina runs off to change outfits, leaving Ivy to his thoughts.

Ivy: Ok, now I have a moment to think of what to do.

Elina: I'm back! *now dressed in a navy blue blouse and skirt*

Ivy: :eek: That was fast.

Elina: Is this better?

Ivy: Uh...yes, much better.

Ketler: :drool: :love:

Elina: :mad: Ice Storm!

Ketler: :gel:

Elina: Have you given any more thought to my offer?

Ivy: (i.h.h.) I see...a man beckoning me...must go to the light... (out loud) Um...well...you see...I...uh...it's like this...

Elina: Who is she?

Ivy: It's not what you thi-!

Elina: I've seen you wandering around with a picture, drooling over it! You've got it right now!

Ivy: :shifty: ...no I don't. *fails Bluff check by more than 10*

Elina: You've been protecting your pocket this whole time! Show it to me!

Ivy: Wait, I can expla- *gets tackled...again*

Elina: *pulls out the picture* Ah hah!

Ivy: No, don't lo-...too late...

Elina: :twitch:

Ivy: Um...I'm sorry?

Elina: You...you...like...Tirmek? :twitch:

Ivy: Uh...

Elina: And to think I've been helping him be pretty as a girl!

Ivy: ...that's not why.

Elina: *stares at the picture for a while* Wait a damn minute here...

Ivy: *Influence Reaction*

Elina: This is a picture of him as a boy!

Ivy: (i.h.h.) Crap, failed that one. Stupid situational modifiers! *Influence Reaction*

Elina: Is THAT why you didn't want to go out with me?!

Ivy: (i.h.h.) Gonna die gonna die gonna die! *INFLUENCE REACTION* *ROLLS NATURAL 20*

Elina: Oh, Ivy, why didn't you just say so?! *hug*

Ivy: *combo of shock and relief*

Elina: Though I'm pretty sure Tirmek isn't interested. Sarah'd have something to say about it, too.

Ivy: You're...ok with this...?

Elina: I don't have a right to deny your feelings, do I?

Ivy: *sigh of 'I'm not gonna die' type relief*

Elina: I'll help you!

Ivy: Wait...help me what?

Elina: Help you find someone, of course!

Ivy: I'm not sure that's such a good id-*yank*

Elina: I'm sure there's a few people at One Eye who'd be interested! Let's go!

Ivy: :weep: (i.h.h.) I may die today after all...
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-30-06, 03:16 PM		WARNING: This post may offend someone. It may be precieved as making disparaging remarks about "people of girth".

OOcat: Was that enough?

Reman: You are now legally covered.
************
OOcat: So……………did love or war win that?

Bunny: It's not over till the fat lady sings.

13: Which is why he came up with cholesterol.

FX demon: :rimshot:
DungeonJman

12-30-06, 03:26 PM		*after changing into a new set of clothes*

AAARGH!!! Paulon, you know its impossible to get an atonement in the real world. Now i'm going to be without the powers of holiness forever and... wait a moment.

(i.h.h.)

Evil Side DungeonJ: Yes, only a few more seconds and his transition to the dark side is complete.

*is hit over the head with a baseball bat*

Good Side DungeonJ: No, bad self, normally i try to be a nice guy, but you're going to far. I must stop you.

Evil DungeonJ: With what?

Good DungeonJ: *forming a ball of divine energy* Just because the main body lost its powers doesn't mean i did.

Evil DungeonJ: *forming a ball of eldritch energy* Bring it on, jerk!

*the following scene shall be shifted to a blank screen in order to prevent your eyes from being blinded*






*BOOOOOOOOOM*


*Both sides, plus the lawful side, who got caught in the crossfire end up on the forgotten freedom*

Oh great, what did i do?

Note:

The evil side is a warlock, who is similar to Volrath, if he was more evil and less daelkyr (madness), also has mastered mind cracking techniques equal to Kanatash, considering he's had nothing else to do when being restricted by the other two sides. (He's actually developed a way to drive all of the major members of the crew insane, including Kanatash, which is more of a driving sane, then insane again, then sane, then messing with everything he is and stands for, then driving him insane, then perfectly sane.)

The good side is a cleric of Good and Protection, who normally has an energetically good personality, that can sometimes be annoying, similar to Aerith's

The lawful side is a knight who basically works on the same principles as an inevitable, except more powerful, and for most laws.

They each posess one third of my full strength, and actively try to pursue their respective alignments. Since you guys made me break my alignment and I CAN'T GET AN ATONEMENT SPELL IN THE REAL WORLD, i can't bring them back, nor would i have the power to keep them in my head, so you're stuck with them.
Charles Phipps

12-30-06, 04:39 PM		OOC: meh, he was just getting back into the spirit of Kanatash.

King Steve: mmmm Gerbilrotica.

Dooj: Oh baby! ONLY 19.95!

Kanatash: NO!
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-30-06, 04:50 PM		OOC: Charles wins another :looloo:. Plus he should win another award for making Crystalforged's post more funny, but I'm too lazy to look through them and decide.
rampant

12-30-06, 05:30 PM		How old is ivy? physically in both forms and mentally?
---------------------------------------------------------------

Dorvos - deeeeeeew deeeeew deewewewwewew

Crowd goes wild

Lily - This is why I hate traveling with bards! They always try to steal the show.

Izzy - This kid is the show!

Kerrith - humph!

Dorvos - :D
Crystalforged

12-30-06, 05:46 PM		OOC: meh, he was just getting back into the spirit of Kanatash.
OOCrystalforged: When you put it that way you make it sound like some sort of religeon.

Kanatash: :plotting: Hmm...

OOCrystalforged: NO! I'm stopping that train of thought right there.

Kanatash: Ah, come on. I already have cults.

OOCrystalforged: Those are cults of the dragon below, you just sponser them. I am not allowing you to set up a religeon around yourself. I won't allow us to become that egocentric.

Kanatash: Awww...

OOCrystalforged: Don't give me that. I have to talk to you anyways about what you did to elvis. Look I know it was a rip off of a south park episode but I still have standards.

Kanatash: Psh. What are you going to do about it.

OOCrystalforged: I'm sending us to tolerance camp.

Kanatash: :eek: No, you wouldn't.

OOCrystalforged: Too late. I've already arranged everything. The men in white coats will be here to pick us up shortly.

Kanatash: :weep: Please anything but that.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-30-06, 05:51 PM		How old is ivy? physically in both forms and mentally?Aside from being the Chosen of the Keeper, he's a normal 10-ish (I think) year-old human boy. In his second, evil form, (which I'm pretty sure he's not going to want to take) he's 16-ish.
ratslinky

12-30-06, 06:22 PM		Gaz: *Now unfrozen. walks down the corridors looking for Tirmek, Sarah or Elina. He finds Sarah first*

Gaz: Hey Sarah wait up

Sarah: *Turns around* Oh hi what do you want

Esabar: He wants to know how to get a racing license

OORatslinky: Ok rampant or kaizer can you reply to that soonish i want to get Gaz racing
rampant

12-30-06, 07:23 PM		Ivy - Is this a good idea? I mean most kids our age aren't really interested in this sort of thing, much less figured out their gender preference.

Elina - Sarah and Tirmek

Ivy - Both of whom suffer from accelerated growth due to outsider blood. Besides they don't do anything really couple-ish. Well aside from ahnging out all the time, and Sarah making him wear girly clothes.

Elina - Shut up and come on.

Ivy - :( (gets dragged off)
-----------------------------------

Tirmek - The forms are included with the enrollment application, just check that box when you get to it.

Gaz - 'k,... one last question : Why is Tirmek wearing a dress?
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-30-06, 09:42 PM		Gaz - ……one last question : Why is Tirmek wearing a dress?
Silver: Because I believe in options. :devil:
Crystalforged

12-30-06, 10:08 PM		Devitzen's Tolerance Camp, black-and-white footage, day. A truck pulls up to the entrance and two guards open the gates. Beyond, forgotten and unused crew members mill around under the watchful eyes of other guards. A few moments later two men in white coats bring Crystalforged/Kanatash out of the truck.

Camp Warden: (sternly) Welcome to tolerance camp. You are here because you would not accept people's differences. Because you refuse to accept the life choices of your fellow man. Well those days are now over. Here you vill verk, every hour of every day until you submit to being tolerant of everybody. Here, intolerance... will not be tolerated.

Kanatash: (turning to Crystalforged) I hate you.

---

Crew members are in a large room the size of an airport hangar. All of them have been doing arts and crafts, as they are dirty with crayons and paint. Each column of tables is being patroled by a guard.

Camp Warden: Today we wll be using the fingerpaint! You vill make a painting that shows people of different races and sexual orientations getting along. Figerpaint. Figerpaint! (the crew members get busy fingepainting) You vill not make any distinction between people of different colors! People with different sexual preferences! You vill accept everyone! (stops behind Kanatash's right shoulder and swoops down to look at his paper) What are you fingerpainting?!

Crystalforged: Uh, a bear?

Camp Warden: Ein bear?! Und bear has nothing to do with accepting people of different races!

Crystalforged: (trembling in fear) Eh I, I don't know what else to paint.

Camp Warden: (takes Crystalforged's paper and rips it up) Start over! (puts his hand on the stack of papers next to Crystalforged) You will fingerpaint what we tell you! (takes a sheet from the stack and slams it down in front of Crystalforged) GO! (Crystalforged starts on a new picture) Faster. (the guard switches to the left shoulder without breaking his stare) Faster! (switches back to the right shoulder and cocks a pistol against Crystalforged's head) Faasterr.

Crystalforged: Aaaa! (hurries to finish the painting)

Camp Warden: Faster! Are you done?! What is it?! What have you done?! (Crystalforged adds some broad strokes and lifts up the finished work)

Crystalforged: (trembling) People of all colors and creeds holding hands beneath a rainbow!

Camp Warden: GOOD! (snatches the paper from Crystalforged's hand) That wasn't so hard, was it? (rips it up and tosses it away) NOW DO IT AGAIN! (walks off slowly) Faster! (the kids work faster) Faasterr!

---

Several days later, the crew members are now in a different room quietly making macaroni pictures on the floor, but they are all fatigued. The guard walks up to a soldier on a catwalk and talks with him.

Camp Warden: Everything in order?

Camp Soldier: Yes, mein Führer. Ve are making the prisoners make macaroni pictures that illustrate diversity in the verkplace.

Camp Warden: (looks at a paper with two people shaking hands and with "DIVERSITY" written above them) Eh-xcellent! (down below the crew continue with their pictures.)

Kanatash: (Suddenly falls on his face) Oh.

Crystalforged: Kanatash. (helps him up and tries to rouse him) Kanatash, you have to keep making your macaroni pictures.

Kanatash: (limply) Can't... glue... any... more . (falls on his face again)

Crystalforged: The guards are coming, Kanatash. Glue. Glue, damn you!

Camp Warden: Take this one away. He is done for. (a soldier drags Kanatash's body along the floor)

Crystalforged: Kanatash!

Kanatash: No more... arts and crafts...

Crystalforged: Jesus... we have to get out of here. (other Crew are passed out, some on their backs, some on their stomachs)
Charles Phipps

12-30-06, 10:34 PM		OOC: Heres a new picture I've chosen for Lilly the ranger! Obviously, when he's older.

http://www.boldoutlaw.com/images/rbthood.jpg

IC:

Lilly: Well, I've successfully re-drawn my character sheet for optimized benefits with my absurdly low wisdom while simultaneously being a combat monkey that casts spells. Thus, I've returned to being a Arcane Paladin which is a Paladin/Transmuter class but have compensated by taking some survival cross class skills, the tracking feat, and getting some enchanted bows. Plus, I've put a whole point into spot.

Ivy: Only 1 point?

Lilly: It was expensive! Now hush you guy I can't see that's right beside me!

Ivy: Did you put anything into Listen?

Lilly: WHAT?

Ivy: And the really tragic part is that you get huge numbers of skill points due to your high intelligence. What DO you spend them on?

Lilly: *plays Mozart's Fifth Symphony on his kazoo as a concentration aid*

Ivy: And I'M the Bard....

Lilly: Well, in any case, I'm just glad that I can pull off all my Leogolas class Arrow badassery!

Ivy: Brother, I don't think you've picked up a bow in your entire life until last week. You practiced solely with swords.

Lilly: It doesn't matter. I can use bows, crossbows, and so on equally well as a sword despite never once wielding it.

Ivy....huh?

Lilly: You see, as a fighter, I'm proficient in their use.

Ivy: But that doesn't make any sense!

Lilly: Best of all, I started as a wizard class before moving to fighter. Tirmek spent centuries mastering the ancient and esoteric arts of fighting with various weapons but because we started at the same level, I just classed into fighter and got all the skills that it took him forever to master.

Ivy: That doesn't seem very fair!

Lilly: Why question it when you live in a world where you become better at public speaker and other social skills by killing things?

Ivy: Touche.

Lilly: Now in any case, I'm going to start charting exactly how we can justify the time skip forward.

Ivy: I thought we agreed it would be better to watch us grow up?

Lilly: Yes, that would make sense if NOT for the fact that NONE of the plotlines we're involved in are plotlines that any ten year old would reasonably be involved in. For Dol Arrah's sake, outside of the Phantom Menace, when the hell has ANY ten year old slaughtered hordes of enemy warriors....and it was stupid there!

Ivy: I admit, biologically, none of us should be interested in sex either yet all our plots have been revolving around sexual tension and angst.

Lilly: In effect, I'm saying we're fourteen and we've been fourteen for most of the storyline which makes this okay in at least Japan. Frankly, I think we should just accelerate to sixteen outright.

Ivy: I would honestly agree. Then we'd still be illegal.

Lilly: Yes, but not entirely GROSS.

Ivy: What did we spend the past four to six years doing anyway?

Lilly: Playing Final Fantasy Tactics.

*a very pregnant Ashe from FF12 walks up*

Ashe: You bastard! You left me when I needed you most!

Lilly: See, jokes like this don't work with kids.

*Miko knocks her out as the now sultry adult looking actress playing a sixteen year old appears by the similiarly so adjusted Lilly and Ivy*

Lilly: There, much better.

Ivy: What if none of the other entities agree?

Lilly: We'll blame it on the craziness of the FF.

*The now older Elina and Sarah walk in*

Elina: Don't I destroy the world when I'm sixteen?

Lilly: Call it moving the plot forward.

Ivy: Lilly, there's something you need to know about Elina.

Elina: YOU BASTARVE! YOU KILLED IVY JUST WHEN HE WAS TRYING TO PROTECT ME AND THEN YOU TRIED TO KIDNAP ME BACK!

Lilly: Uhhh...

Ivy: Uhhhh...

Elina: I JUST WANT TO SAY THAT I HATE YOU! I HATE EVERYTHING YOU STAND FOR! I'LL DESTROY THE PROPHECY YOU'RE TRYING TO PROTECT AND I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN! NEVER! NEVER! NEVER!

*Elina stomps off and drags Ivy away*

Lilly: Of course, puberty's affects on horomones might have a down side....

Miko: It's okay Lilly. I love you.

Lilly: Well Miko, I honestly don't feel....

Miko: CHARM PERSON.

Lilly: Lousy low will save.

*Is drug off to have sex*

Elsewhere

Elina: Oh No! Blasted Horomones! What have I done!

Ivy: Really, it's okay! I don't blame Lilly for what he did!

Elina: I must go talk to him!

*Elina rushes back*

*Finds Miko and he in a compromising position in a scene very similiar to Order of the Stick*

Lilly: And once more my Elanish luck occurs.

Miko: I'm younger and have higher charisma so Nyah!
ratslinky

12-30-06, 11:20 PM		Gaz: Now lets see i want Racing *ticks box* and Arena fighting *ticks box* and Advanced spell weaving *ticks box* and the Charmers class to wealth *Ticks box with extra large tick*.

Esabar: Hey I want Hiding and sneaking and Poisons

Gaz: Okay *ticks both boxs* you always did like that stuff. anything else?

Esabar: Yep Sniping classes and Diving.

Gaz: *tick boxs* there you are always like killing even when your good

Esabar: :D
Crystalforged

12-30-06, 11:24 PM		Lilly: Yes, that would make sense if NOT for the fact that NONE of the plotlines we're involved in are plotlines that any ten year old would reasonably be involved in. For Dol Arrah's sake, outside of the Phantom Menace, when the hell has ANY ten year old slaughtered hordes of enemy warriors....and it was stupid there!
Legend of Zelda. :P Hell in half of those games Link can't be older than 12. By the way if you try to call Zelda stupid... Well lets just say I have a feeling I won't be the only one after you on this thread and they'll never find the body.

Ivy: I admit, biologically, none of us should be interested in sex either yet all our plots have been revolving around sexual tension and angst.

I'm pretty sure I know who's responsible for that at least.

Silver: :D

Impatient.

OOCrystalforged: Hey, wait a second. Who are you? I'm still locked up in tolerance camp with Kanatash!

I'm the other voice in your head.

OOCrystalforged: What are you talking about. Kanatash is the only voice in my head.

Heh, thats what you think. I've been chatting with you for a while but you've just mistook me for Kanatash

OOCrystalforged: That still doesn't explain who you are.

Oh, you'll find out soon enough.

OOCrystalforged: HEY! I'm not done with you! You can't leave yet! Hey!

Aribiderchy sucker.
Charles Phipps

12-30-06, 11:43 PM		Zelda is stupid.

Crystal Forged: Prepare to DI...

*Link shivs Crystal forged*

Crystal Forged: My Lord, why have you forsaken me?

Link: Just so we're clear, Zelda NEVER knows about the Ranch girl?

You got it.

Link: *rolls body into Zora river*
rampant

12-31-06, 12:34 AM		Ok so are Ivy and Lily the only ones getting boosted?
Charles Phipps

12-31-06, 12:51 AM		OOC: Only if Kaizer does't want Sarah and Elina too. I intend to RPG them older.
rampant

12-31-06, 12:54 AM		Ok So Ivy and Lily are aged up a bit.

That actually makes Elina's idea more plausible.

:evillaugh: Where did I put that one with the spiked tentacles!

Ivy - :OMG!
Kaizer_Ryu

12-31-06, 01:03 AM		Ok so are Ivy and Lily the only ones getting boosted?
I guess that's up to us. I'm still not entirely sure if I should go along or not. I can see both pro's and con's.

Pros:
1.) Silver stops poking me
2.) We can do more plotlines with the kids
3.) Said plots (as well as current ones) make more sense as far as reasonable maturity goes
4.) Sarah and Elina get their third Dol Dornmas wish
5.) Having main characters with babies is really damn hard to do during serious story arcs
6.) Most of my current ideas involve them being older
7.) I'm impatient

Cons:
1.) We miss the growing up
2.) Some of the fun of the current arcs is the disconnect between their physical and mental ages
3.) What happens in the intervening years?
4.) Sarah and Elina get their third Dol Dornmas wish
5.) Having main characters deal with babies is actually quite funny
6.) I have to come up with names and partial personalities for my four new characters much faster than I thought

Most of my hesitation to accelerate really hinges on the first one. But almost all of my objections can be negated by the 'just do a flashback' argument.

I'd suggest a vote, but we all know how well that usually turns out. :rolleyes: Besides, several posters are unable to contribute over break.

For now, I'm gonna vouch for a four year jump. Six years seems like too much, and two years like too little. If too many object to the jump, we can scrap it.

BTW, Charles. Maybe it's just me, but I can't get your link to work. 'Forbidden access on this server' or whatever.
Crystalforged

12-31-06, 01:13 AM		Zelda is stupid.

Crystal Forged: Prepare to DI...

*Link shivs Crystal forged*

Crystal Forged: My Lord, why have you forsaken me?

Link: Just so we're clear, Zelda NEVER knows about the Ranch girl?

You got it.

Link: *rolls body into Zora river*
Crystalforged: (while being rolled into the river) Th-there is another. H-he will avenge me...

(falls limp)

(glances over to notice Kaizer Ryu has posted in the mean time)

WHY AREN'T YOU AVENGING ME! :weep:
Charles Phipps

12-31-06, 01:22 AM		http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/rbthood.jpg

And by the DM-IEST powers, I declare that there has been a four year time skip.

...in certain areas of the ship.

Other areas still have progressed normally for WHACKY adventures to thus ensue as people walk by and see everyone aged.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-31-06, 01:27 AM		WHY AREN'T YOU AVENGING ME! :weep:
OOKaizer: BECAUSE I'M THE FRIGGIN' LAME-ASS SPOONY LINK! I can't do jack because my controls are crap and my reaction time makes frozen molassas look like Sonic! Besides, I've been offered a chance to upgrade to Twilight Princess Link if I can pull off one of my ideas. I'm not going to jeopardize that.

Link: Exactly. It's nothing personal.

OOCharles: Hooray for Blackmail! :D

OOCrystalforged: :weep: OOcat is my only hope...

...

...

...

OOCrystalforged: :weep: He's busy with Twilight Princess, isn't he?

OOCharles: Yep. :P
rampant

12-31-06, 01:28 AM		Dorvos - Meh!

Lily - I so could with my new bod!

Kerrith - You never learn do you?

Izzy - He swallowed a keg of hellbrew! You cannot beat that lily!

Lily - But I'm older and tougher now!

Kerrith - Customized living uberation construct! You cannot beat him in a drinking contest!
Charles Phipps

12-31-06, 01:30 AM		Yes, he could.

Lilly: I can?

Yes, because that's Jason Connery. Meaning Lilly is Scottish.
rampant

12-31-06, 02:02 AM		He's also still underage, even with the age boost.:P
-----------------------------------

Elina - Misperin!

Misperin (Tellowas's big bro) - Huh?

Ivy - She's gotten it into her head i need a boyfriend:rolleyes:

Misperin - OH AND YOU COM STRAIGHT TO THE ELF MAN IS THAT IT! JUST BECAUSE WE DON"T CONFORM TO YOUR IDEAS OF MANILINESS MEANS WE'RE ALL GAY!

Gig (Fiend-blooded half-giant male) - Hey luv, you up for tonight?

Misperin - Always honey!...What are you two looking at me like that for?
Kaizer_Ryu

12-31-06, 03:03 AM		OOKaizer: :thinks: What was that phrase again? It's on the tip of my tongue...

OOEled: If it's not Scottish it's CRAP!

OOKaizer: That's it!

OOC: Ok, I got their descriptions written up. But first, because I feel like it, a little definition of the new Native Outsider type I created:

Suferot
Medium Native outsider (Neutral)
Blend of Half-Fiend, Half-Celestial, and Half-Elf Templates
Has signs of Werewolf-ism, either latent or active
Possesses innate understanding of Shadowmatter
If killed, they will eventually regenerate, length depending on the circumstances
Each possesses a great deal of innate power, restrained by Terra's seals placed on their Chakra points shortly after birth

I now present to you the newest additions to the Branford Clan:

Nina Branford
Female Suferot

The first of Terra's triplets, and the oldest of the identical twins from the set, Nina shows signs of Clerical talent. More often than not, she heals herself after spills and such, and her siblings often come to her with minor wounds. Eternally cheerful, she tries to brighten everyone's day just a little bit, even if she can't quite understand why they are down in the first place. She has Terra's green eyes, and her hair is purple.

Deis Branford
Female Suferot

The second of the twins, Deis shows promise as a Sorcerer. Except for her personality, she is identical to Nina in every way. Deis is very headstrong, and can be a bit pushy if she thinks things aren't going as fast or as well as she thinks they should. In spite of this, or perhaps because of it, she is intensely protective of her siblings. She and Nina have a braided ponytail in the back, tied with the ribbons their parents received as wedding gifts from their Entity.

Scias Branford
Male Suferot

The fraternal triplet and only male of the family, Scias' talent is not in doubt. He has a penchant for thievery rivalling that of Telfon (remember the Warforged rampant created for the alternate universe?). It took his mothers two weeks to figure out how exactly he kept getting ahold of all the things they had placed out of his reach. He merely stole the intervening space. Needless to say, this has made life...interesting for his parents. This one is definitely a full blooded Werewolf. He was born in hybrid form, and still bears the ears, tail, and canines to prove it. The seals have since caused him to return to humanoid form, but his senses have not dulled. He has short, brown hair and deep greenish-yellow eyes.

Momo Hopeforge
Female Suferot

Lisa's daughter, Momo likes to tinker. Many of her toys lie in pieces, but not broken. She desires to know how everything is put together, and her parents have seriously considered taking Artificer levels just to keep up with her constant dismanteling. She has managed to build several simple devices already, mostly by copying existing objects, but novel (for her) creations have started to appear as she grows. Her long, silver hair shimmers as it falls over her shoulders, framing her fire-red eyes.

And now for an update on Sarah and Elina:

Sarah and Elina have their wish, and finally got their first real bra's about six months ago. Elina has turned into a bit of a Goth, minus the wearing all black. She has let her hair grow out (it now reaches to her mid-back), and adopted the 'bangs covering one eye' look. Sarah has also let her hair grow, but only to shoulder length. She forever keeps it in a ponytail (can you tell I'm a fan of ponytails yet?) bound with the scrunchy Tirmek gave her for her fourteenth birthday. She and Tirmek have become a bit of an item and the source of endless gossip around One Eye Academy, but they have yet to officially start dating.

Elina thinks they should just get it over with. And get a room.

She's just jealous because Ivy rejected her. She still has issues around Lilly, but whether that's from genuine dislike, attraction she refuses to admit to, or both has yet to be seen.
rampant

12-31-06, 04:00 AM		OOC: for the sake of Satnak not pulling me through a small keyhole Dorvos aging is going to be done befrore he left but after any other posts with him due to a time loop that let him come home for four years between planehopper posts
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Dorvos (Bard/Shaper) - Tall, yet rail thin, he Likes to wear dark purple clothing almost black, wears his hair shoulder length, and loves to make music. Still has trouble making words, but can force them out if neccesary. Starts at the island as soon as he gets back from babysiting Lily, Kerrith, and to a lesser degree Izzy. (you can tell which one of the three he thinks might have an average wis score) Mittens no longer spends as much time on his head, she prefers to wander around a bit, but comes running if needed. Dorvos has long since mastered the astral construct, and is capable of techniques even masters would drop their jaws at.

Teiza - (OORampant :hides: ) (Totemist/Shadowcaster) Stands about 4ft high now, with some of Serene's soft features overlaying Satnak's Athletic build. This is one scary little girl. Ketler has recieved the worst beatdowns of his life from her, the perv has had to learn to sleep with both eyes open lest his own shadow strangles him. She is fiercely protective of her siblings (Corre especially), and any threat to them is repaid three fold. She continues her training with Terra, and is not disuaded by the increasing workload (when sleep isn't an issue you just have more time on your hands), in fact she will be taking a few classes at One Eye soon. She has also continued down the path of the Totemist, already possesing abundant natural weaponry she focus on melds that improve existing abilites. Nothing smaller than a whale is safe. Rip is probably her best friend, because no one without an above average will save can look her in the eye, needless to say Lily can barely be in the same room with her.

Corre - (Swordsage) Is determined to not be the runt of the litter. Much more physical than her brother, and not as fiercely intellectual as her Sister she focuses on combat. She has mastered many Manuevers and stances, but is quickly approaching the limit of whats availiable on The FF. Unlike Teiza she is considering other options for further education. Whatch out that bag of holding has about a dozen different weapons in there. Her Cat Tear is a constant companion and even performs with her when she dances.

Satnak - Is doing much better now that she gets to sleep once in a while, much to her students (and especially her kids chagrin), She is a real task master now. (Everyone in her classes or training sessions :hides: ) Serene is quite pleased though ;) .

Tirmek has put on some serious muscle, Ever the competitive one He has managed to keep up with Sarah and Elina through intense study, training, and sheer force of will (some would also add forbidden rituals and illegal techniques to that list).

Kithle is currently casting a growth spell on Timmiwinks, who is still inside Doog.

Doog - Now I know what Ishmael felt like.

Chalky is ... Chewing on me.
ratslinky

12-31-06, 08:30 AM		Ok here's Gaz and Esabars write up. Gaz has managed to keep up with Sarah, Elina and Tirmek by becoming so good at diplomacy and bluff on top of his skills as a beguiler that as soon as a fight starts he can usauly have both ofending partys buying each other drinks in a minute after the start. He still relies on Esabar to give him info on his rivals fighting abilty's tho.

Now for Esabar. Esabar has become less and less out going but her knowledge of everything has become encyclopedic (its so easy to take note of details in a fight or anyother stressful stiuation when you don't have to worry about that stuff). I want you guys to now think of Esabar as Cortarna (hope I spelled that right) from Halo. She rarely speaks to anyone but Gaz because she is in his head and Elina have become a bit goth herself.

OORatslinky: I'll do levels later when i get an indication of what area they should be in.
Charles Phipps

12-31-06, 08:33 AM		*A 4 year old half elf walks along the Forgotten Freedom's deck*

Poppie Galan: KITTY!

Kitten: Hmmm?

*Is grabbed by the 36 Strength of the Little boy*

Kitten: GAH!

Rose: Are you absolutely SURE that Caralot didn't fool around with your pregnancy?

Zella: Duh.
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-31-06, 09:35 AM		OOCrystalforged: :weep: He's busy with Twilight Princess, isn't he?

OOCharles: Yep. :P
OOcat: Wind Waker, actually.

OOCrystalforged: Avenge……me…

OOcat: Just as soon as I think up a sutably heroic persona.

OOCrystalforged: Oh……crap…:ghosted:
**********
Meanwhile, in Caralot's dimension (in which no skip ever takes place)……

Kitten and her grandparents emerge from an elevator on a top level of Sharn near the airship docking towers. Kitten immediately notices the wheeled metal vehicles running along the road in front of them.

Kitten: What are those things? Wow! Look at that one go! That's got to be dangerous. Why do they let people have those?

Darastrix: Those things are called "automobiles", "car" for short, and yes, they are dangerous, especially when people drink alchohol before driving. And some people just drive terribly ever without drinking, especially if they're also trying to talk on their sending crystals.

Kitten: Then why does anyone let people have these thing? They're so obviously dangerous. It's clearly because everyone involved is stupid. :mad:

Bruce: You hit that nail right on the head.

Kitten: What? :confused:

Darastrix: If everyone involved is stupid, that means the people making the policy are also stupid. So why should they be trusted to make intelligent decisions?

Kitten: But……………there has to be someone smart.

Bruce: Did it ever occur to you that the smart people take one look at the whole thing and decide not to do anything?

Kitten: That's just lazy! :mad:

Bruce: Deciding that you aren't qualified to make decisions for people is lazy?

Kitten: If you're smarter than everyone else………:confused:………doesn't that make you automatically qualified?

Bruce: :P That's dangerous thinkin' right there. I met a few villains in my crimefighting days that thought like you. They were convinced that just because they were "better" than everyone else they should get to be in charge.

Darastrix: Being smart doesn't necessarily mean you know what's good for people. Isn't happiness good for people?

Kitten: I can see where this is going! And no, I will not admit that being happy is enough of an excuse to let people do what they want! :mad: They might want to do something that hurts other people!

Bruce and Darastrix: *collective sigh*

Just then a heavily armored vehicle with a logo on the side that reads "First Brelish Bank" and two people in the cab who are obviously not security personel comes roaring past.

Random Orc Bystander: Look! Up in the sky!

Random Dwarven Bystander: Is it a bird?

Random Human Bystander: Is it an airskiff?

RDB: No, I'm quite sure it's a bird, it has feathered wings.

RHB: No, it's…

Collective: Überman!

A angel comes rocketing past the crowd in pursuit of the armored bank vehicle.

Kitten: What was that?

Bruce: That would be today's version of a crimefighter: an overpowered pretty-boy who thinks he's in diguise if he puts on a pair of glasses.

Kitten: Crimefighter? So those two guys in the armored car stole it? And he's going to get it back?

Bruce: That's the idea.

Kitten: Why? Let the watch handle it.

Bruce: The corrupt one?

Kitten: Um………

Bruce: Why don't you think about it on the way to the ship?

Kitten: But what you were just saying about not doing things just because you think it's what's good for people—

Bruce: Think about it, Kitten.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-31-06, 12:52 PM		Momo: Ane-chan!

Sarah: *picks her up* There you are! How's my favorite little Artificer?

Momo: I made something for you! I call it the Grab-o Arm.

The strange device has a three clawed metal hand attached to a series of wooden bars connected with screws to form an extensor coil, which is in turn attached to a handle and trigger. When Sarah pulls the trigger, it reaches out, hand open.

Sarah: This thing is awesome! The Grab-o Arm demands respect.

Momo: :D Hee hee!

Sarah: Thank you, Momo. I love i-hey! Where'd it go?

-----

Scias: :devil:

Squishy: It's taken me three years of hard work, but I've finally managed to find a way off this gods forsaken rock! Just a few more calculations and I'm done. I sure hope nothing happens to my calculator. It's got all my data stored in i-SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEECH!!!!!!!!!!

Scias: *holding the Grab-o Arm & calculator* :evillaugh

Running off, he manages to hit just about evey button on the calculator while he returns the Grab-o Arm by stealing the space between himself and his perplexed sisters. He also manages to steal his own pants, but he'll figure that one out in a while.

-----

Sarah: Scias, what have we told you about doing that kind of thing?

Scias: D-d-d-..............*anime sweatdrop*....don't.

(OOC: I forgot to mention, Scias has a bit of a stutter. He's smart, but says very little.)

Sarah: Now put your pants back on. I'm gonna-hey!

Her hair falls down as Scias inadvertantly steals her scrunchy.

Scias: S-s-s-s............sorry.

Sarah: *sigh*

-----

Squishy: :weep:

Nina: What's a matter, Uncle Squishy? Are you hurt?

Squishy: :weep:

Nina: :D I know! *claps her hands together*

*a little bit later*

Deis: :nonono: You're unbelieveable, sis.

Nina: :( I thought for sure this would work...

Squishy is now decked out in a wreath of flowers in the shape of a Great Helm. He still just sits there, near catatonic.

Deis: :devil: You've gotta do the make-up too!

Nina: Ok!

-----

Elina: What are you doing?

Sarah: :smirk: You'll see...

The Grab-o Arm flies off and grabs something.

Tirmek: :eek: Hey! Who pinched my-.....oh. :embarrass

Elina: :nonono: Seriously: Get. A. Room.
Phantomcrossing

12-31-06, 01:15 PM		On the busy streets of Korth a tall figure walks out of a house Sivis message station.

Norbaz: Damn it, no one is willing to contact the Freedom. How in Khyber am I supposed to get back to if I can't find it... I even remastered the Chili...

the image of that old lady with the spider in the freedom's kitchen haunts Norbaz's memories, "Chili has to warm the soul, not melt the stomach,"...

Norbaz: Teacher...I've mastered it. I've made chili that can warm the soul and not melt the stomach...but it can still melt everything else...I have to find my way back to the freedom.

A nearby tower explodes and people begin running around screaming on fire. An airship's elemental ring burns in the sky speeding away in the distance.

Nobraz: sigh...well, at least I know where the ship is now.

The half giant runs off after the ship as the Korth watch fills the streets. Pulling out an oversized crossbow that more closely resembles a balista. Quickly digging through his side pouch he pulls a bolt with no arrow head, but a glowing red gem atop it.

Norbaz: I hope this get's their attention.

The half giant fires the bolt up alongside the forgotten freedom, it explodes in a blinding red signal flare making it as if it were daylight...but red. The distinct aroma of Chili wafts through the air.

Norbaz still running waves his arms.

Norbaz: I hope that got their attention.

Meanwhile on the ship, five seconds earlier.

Dooj: Ah, Korth, always fun raizing this place...hey whats that red dot out ther- OH GODS MY EYES!

(sorry for my absence, had a really bad semester)
cypher_zero

12-31-06, 01:23 PM		Satnak: I SMELL CHILI!!!!

Crew: RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
.
Phantomcrossing

12-31-06, 01:25 PM		Norbaz (still running) : Huh, I can hear Satnak from here, that bolt was worth every dragon. (yay, I've buffed up on Eberron lingo) HEY, SATNAK! I HAVE A NEW CHILI RECIPE!
rampant

12-31-06, 01:34 PM		Teiza - CHILI!

Satnak - CHILI!

Norbaz - THEY'RE MULTIPLYING!
cypher_zero

12-31-06, 02:06 PM		In Sa’vor’s dimension:

Sa’vor lies quietly in the darkened room; a small sliver of moonlight the only illumination cast. His breathing was soft and shallow, barley causing a rise of his chest on which his hands rested. His eyes stared open at the far off ceiling lost in thought.

There was no movement in the room, no stir of air, no breath of sound, yet Sa’vor knew he was there. The time had come, as he had always known it would, for him to die.

Sa’vor: Hello Terrek.

Terrek stepped forward from the shadows into the moonlight. The pale light played strangely across his features as though he was not a man at all, but some otherworldly being..

Sa’vor: I knew you’d come.

Terrek: You made it evident I was expected. I let them live by the way; the lawyers I mean. I don’t know that you care, but I thought it might be a gesture of good faith.

Sa’vor smiled slightly. Those demons were expendable; their kind always were, but they had their uses.

Sa’vor: You didn’t need to. I’m through with them.

Terrek: You’ve made all the necessary arrangements then?

Sa’vor: Yes.

Terrek: You know of course what comes next then.

Sa’vor closed his eyes and nodded. It was time to embrace death.

He lay there still for a moment and then opened his eyes and looked up. In front of his face was the hilt of his sword, held out to him by Terrek. Sa’vor looked up at Terrek confused.

Terrek: You are a warrior. You have been a warrior since I have known you and long before that even. I will not take your life as you lie there helpless. If you wish to die, you will die in battle, as befits a warrior. No other death suits you.

Sa’vor smiled and took the hilt. He rose and quickly donned his armor.

They stood facing each other for a moment then bowed. Sa’vor raised his sword while Terrek raised his clawed hands. Around him his chains sprang to life and rose as though to defend their master. Sa’vor struck first, diving inward to slash at Terrek with a powerful overhand blow. Terrek's chains rose to block the blade. Energy crackled around them as Sa’vor pressed with all his might. Terrek reached out to slash with his claws and Sa’vor jumped back, spinning around with a kick as he did so. The chains dropped for a moment to parry the blow and Sa’vor sent a blast of eldritch energy at Terrek's face. Terrek dove to the side and the blast blew a hole in the wall behind him. Terrek rose slowly, his hands crackling with malignant arches of black lightning. His chains whipped forward a slashed at Sa’vor, stabbing for the gaps in his armor but the dragon vampire parried and sidestepped the chains as though they were nothing. Suddenly Terrek was behind him. Sa’vor whirled around and brought his sword to bear, but Terrek caught it one-handed. With the other he grabbed Sa’vor by the throat and lifted him from the ground. Black energy still coursed from the metallic blades Terrek called hands, but Sa’vor stared back and grasped Terrek's wrist with his free hand.

Terrek: So you have chosen to die.

Sa’vor: I have lost the will to fight. It has availed me little.

Terrek: Then I am honored to be the hand the fells you.

Terrek's chains rose again and plunged themselves into Sa’vor’s body. Terrek pulled the sword from his hand then shoved it though his Sa’vor’s chestplate. With the hand that still clasped Sa’vor’s throat, Terrek lowered him to the ground as black lightning coursed throughout his body. Finally, Sa’vor’s hand fell from Terrek's wrist and he breathed his last. As the air left Sa’vor’s lungs, Terrek drew it in, taking with it the soul he had sewn into Sa’vor’s chest so long ago…
.
Lord Kale Fangblade

12-31-06, 02:56 PM		Sithis Dreamed, the hunger rose high in his chest as moved through the dark streets of sharn. the rain thundering down upon him, he drew his black cloak further about him. the hood obscured his face in shadows. he kept to the darkness, keeping far away from the pools of light cast by the Everlight lanterns. soon he reached his destination, he looked down at a puddle of water. there was no reflection of him cast. the deep ache of his jaw heralded the arival of his fangs. He raised a hand towards the everbright lantens that stood either side of the estates doorway and clenched it into a fist. the nights extinguished as he easily scattered their enchantment.

he walked silently towards the door and knocked. the door was answered by a young woman, her dark mid-length hair lay against her neck, causing his hunger to increase.

Young Woman: oh hello sir, what buisness do you want at such a late hour?

He moved in a blur, grabbing the back of the womans neck and dragging her towards him. he bit into her neck, feeling the joyous feeling as her blood splashed against his tongue. its taste filled him as he drained away her life energy to replenish his. too soon she was empty. her heart stopped as the last of her life was snuffed out. he dropped her cold corpse and vanished into the night. his hunger sated for now....

Sithis awoke. again with the nightmares.... he had been having them for so long now. they almost seemed normal.
he knew vampires had dreams like this when they needed to feed. but why him? he was still living, why would he be born with the desire to drink blood. he wasnt a vampire as he pretended... well not a full one at least.
what was it his Grandfather had told him?

he remembered the conversation well. it had been when he was but one hundred and forty years of age. and he had been sent to his grandfathers office. it was common for children born unto vampires to be half-bloods until they came of age. but the experiments? the training. what had it all meant.
he remebered Grand-father sitting by the fire in a chair, he required no heat. so why make a fire? that had always puzzled Sithis. he was younger then, his face bore almost no lines of age or worry. Sithis had asked him why him and twenty other children where participating in such strange training.
He had answered thus

"you are born of death and life, my people call you Daereni, litrealy meaning Deadborn. It was an anchient legend amoung the Aereni and the Tardinal it was possible for Vampires whom had fed on much blood to create new life.
but this life was tained with negative energy making a half vampire. it is then said that an anchient Necromancer had once found such a child, and through rituals and training created somthing much much stronger. to complete the transformation a vampire fed on the child and began the transformation of that child into one of his own kind. The necromancer forced the Vampire to stop halfway, and as the child lay on the brink of unlife he brought the child back."

Sithis: wouldnt that make him even more like the Vampires?

Sa'vor: *smile* it would indeed. for the child had become even closer tied to the darkness. the Negative energy. his soul became infused with Negative and Positive energy in equal amounts, he found he had powers greater than even the vampire lords. he found that he was stronger, faster, tougher than even his undead kindred. he was the link between life and unlife. bound to each but a member of niether. Venoms where less effective on him, he aged slower, illness did not harm him as it once did. he also found that he was healed by both negative and positive energy.

Sithis: and your attempting to duplicate that? why?

Sa'vor: as you know this kingdom is not exactly equal. though we have tried to keep balance there is still curruption and as you know some lords use their undeath to exploit the people.
the people need someone they can trust, someone to make a link between the undead and the living. they need people whom are strong enough to bring vampires to justice. that is why im duplicating the necromancers experiments.

Sithis: i see... but surely the Daereni have a weakness in that if you cut of their head or pierce their heart they die? how would we overcome the weakness of being grieviously wounded?

Sa'vor: vampires drain life force to sustain them yes?

Sithis: of course.

Sa'vor: and is it not true they pool this positive energy in a lifewell to be converted into the Negative energy that they require?

Sithis: So your saying we can do that?

Sa'vor: no. im saying that you can also pool life energy, but not for the same reason a vampire does. Unlike vampires you can feed on normal foods to gain the energy you need. But like vampires, you can use life energy to repair yourself. to rebuild your body.

Sithis: and how would we gather this excess life energy?

Sa'vor: the same way a vampire does: feeding or by draining it from your enviroment. you need not kill the one you feed upon. only a small amount of life energy is enough to reknit most wounds. but remeber you are not invincible. unlike vampires you cannot reform when you die. but after death, due to the negative energy inhent in your body and the vampiric virus that dwells in your blood. you will become like your kindred.

Sithis pulled out of the memory. and raised a hand to his neck, feeling the two almost invisible scars on his neck. upon the complition of his training and the experiments he'd been bitten... and ever since the lust for blood had burned in his veins higher than he had thought possible. he still wasnt one of the undead. but even so the hunger was just as strong.

Sithis rose and dressed. making sure to disguise the scars on his neck. he dressed in his standard noble mans clothing with a black sash about his waist. he walked over to the long box on his desk, he opened it and opon the the black velvet within it lay many many small weapons and knives. he removed two alchemical silver Stilettos from the box and hid them in his sleves. he then removed the deadly little hand crossbow he'd got on his one hundeth birthday and hid that about his person as well.

he drew a wand from the box and hid it in his jacket, he then attached four more wands to his belt and finaly he attached his longsword and sheath to his belt as well. he closed the box and went to the door picking up his dark wood staff on the way. he cleared his mind of all underlying thoughts and worries and prepared for another day of school. the nightmare still remained vivid in his mind, the always did. and no matter how much he tried he still couldnt shake the phantom taste of blood from his tongue.

he steeled himself as the rushing sensation of passing though the portal onto the forgotten freedoms deck. he proceeded quickly towards the portal to the Citadel. if he was lucky they wouldnt be that much blood today. he probably wouldnt be able to control himself if there was. Images appeared of the slaughter at the cabin and the child floated forth. he still couldnt shake the empty look in the childs eyes.... like it was hollow.... he shuddered. he didnt know what he was hunting but what ever it was he would be ready. and he would strike it down. no matter what.
DungeonJman

12-31-06, 04:42 PM		Lawful DungeonJ: THIS TIMESKIP IS AN ABOMINATION AGAINST THE SPACE TIME CONTINUOUM, LET ME GET REVENGE!!!!

*Good side is holding him down*

Good DungeonJ: No attempting to hurt the E.B.N.E.'s for messing up the space time continum, it's their job

*processing*

Lawful DungeonJ: You are right. For the record, I am surprised that you have not tried to alter things for the better.

Good DungeonJ: Look, Dorvos left, so i can't show him the stuff from Dragon Magic about alternate things that can be done with bardic music and no one here knows how to convert ninjustsu from naruto into manuvers, boosts and stances. But i'm still trying to brighten up the days of most people on this ship :) . *looks around* So, i guess i'm off to help get Squishy out of there.

*walks away*

Lawful DungeonJ: For the record, since the good version of the main personality is here, what happened to the evil side.
________________________________________ ____________

*meanwhile, Kanatash wakes up in a room tied to a chair with chains, back in the FF universe, despite being incorporeal. The evil side then walks in.*

Evil DungeonJ: Well, well, i've wanted to do this for a long time.

Kanatash: Well, interesting, i thought that you were a paladin of some kind. Finally snapped?

Evil DungeonJ: Nope, you're speaking to the evil side of his personality. First you should thank me for getting you out of that stupid tolerance camp, lousy stinking acceptors of other people. Anyway, since you're an expert in torture, i'm pretty sure you know how this works. Come on, guess, since the chains and chair are ghost touch, there's an extreme strength catapsi field over the whole room, and any way of sending for help has been averted. Plus the door has been locked and with the same precautions and anti arcane and anti divine fields and it's a wall of force behind an adamantine door.

Kanatash: How'd you afford all of that?

Evil DungeonJ:To top off the evil, it's been financed by the cults that you've sponsored, filed through bureacracies and been invested in Microsoft stock before being bought back.
rampant

12-31-06, 04:53 PM		Evil DungeonJ: To top off the evil, it's been financed by the cults that you've sponsored, filed through bureacracies and been invested in Microsoft stock before being bought back.

Wow he is evil.
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Dorvos - *holds up a copy of Dragon magic* :D
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Teiza - hey! I was reading that!...You!

Scias - :eek: (runs for it)

Teiza - (uses blink shirt to appear in front of Scias) Mine **GLARE**

Scias - H..h..h..here (gives her back the book of shadow magic techniques)
DungeonJman

12-31-06, 05:35 PM		And that is why i don't let him out of my head.

*Evil DungeonJ notices rampant's comment and begins staring at the air maniacally and laughs*

Kanatash: What the heck was that?

Evil DungeonJ: Oh, that's the mandatory "When someone says they have seen the face of true evil, it has to stare back laughing." bit
Lord Kale Fangblade

12-31-06, 05:38 PM		Time skip stuff.

Sithis

Sithis has changed quite a lot, he's become even taller gracing a towering seven and a half feet. his dragon marked powers have come out, making him a full scion of house vol. Sithis now wears his hair long and bound in a pony tail. his canines are now peremently lengthed. despite his hight and lithe build he moves with an almost unholy grace. Sithis's eye colour has changed as well, becoming a hellish red which comes from his Devilish heritage.
Sithis still wears a noble mans outfit most of the time but in battle he now wears a suit of Darkwood breastplate with bones grafted to it.
Sithis is constantly surrounded with an otherworldly aura, most times its subtle. When Sithis becomes angry it becomes a huge aura of Hellish might.

Sithis has also manifested the first of his Runes, a Black Necromantic rune above his eyebrow. its design is very different from that of Naz'roth or Sa'vors and when Sithis draws on large amounts of magic it glows with black energyies.
Sithis is skilled as several of the Arcane schools, These being Necromancy (natrualy), Conjuration, Enchantment, Illusion and Transmutation.
Sithis has also aquired a Shadow Sibling as well as a mind leech and recently he's stretched out into Artifice and Psionics (Telepathy).
Sithis's Hunger for blood has grown more pronounced but currently he hasnt lost control, despite a close call of almost biteing an opponent within the arena.

In combat Sithis favours stealth and speed over brawn. often sticking to the shadows to pick out targets with his eldritch blasts and more precise spells.
Sithis keeps great control over his emotions, only letting them out in cercumstances that he requires the extra boost from anger or hate.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-31-06, 06:31 PM		Terra and Lisa sit with their youngest four in the stands of the arena at One Eye. Sarah and Elina had something planned, but said it was a surprise. Their Sacral (sexuality/nurturing) seals had unbound about a month ago, but they had shown no signs of further progress. At least, none that they showed...

This wasn't a formal match, so it was only really the six of them, Ketty and Tirmek, Serene, Satnak, and their bunch, Sithis, Gaz/Esabar, and a few other interested classmates.

Elina: *manifests dual mindblades* Ready? We've got a show to put on.

Sarah: *slips on her gauntlets* Just make sure you don't slow me down. :P

The girls circled slowly, methodically, sizing each other up. To the casual viewer, this would have seemed rather boring, but to the trained eye, the fighting was already well underway. A combination of Psionic and Shadow energies swirled about, unseen but not unnoticed. They were trying to get a foothold, a place from which to launch their first assault in the physical realm.

Lisa: They've really come a long way this year. It was only a few months ago that they'd be beating each others brains out by now.

Terra: They've rounded out. They have seen that force is not enough. If you are not in a position to strike, all the power in the world will not avail you.

Ketty: It looks to be an even match.

Tirmek: Elina will win this first round.

Ketty: What makes you so sure?

Tirmek: Sarah's impatient. Impulsive. She's come a long way in controlling the hunting instinct, but her rage will win eventually.

Lisa: How are you two standing in your duels?

Tirmek: :D I'm ahead by three.

Terra: Eyes on them. It's almost to the next stage.

As Tirmek predicted, Sarah faltered first and was struck by a wave of Psionic energy. What he did not predict, however, was Elina being hit with it's aftermath. Elina had won the Psychic duel, Sarah the Shadow. They each recovered and landed, returning to the fray. With her mindblades, Elina cut a literal hole in space and skipped about 30 feet in an instant, reappearing right in front of Sarah. The impact was not to be. Elina passed right through her as Sarah shifted to shadow form.

Terra: Huh...didn't know she could do that...

Lisa: Which one?

Terra: Yes.

Elina turned one of her mindblades into a spear and jammed it into the ground. Swinging around, she caught Sarah across the chin as she reformed and turned. As Sarah fell to the ground, Elina let go and went for a smash with her remaining mindblade (warhammer). Sarah whipped around, knocking the hammer away and landing a punch to the face. The two righted themselves yet again, smirking at each other.

Elina: Enough warmup?

Sarah: Bring it.

They take to the skies, engaging each other in a dogfight. The irony of that description is not lost on the viewers. Elina reforms her mindblades as the two clash again and again. Shockwaves radiate throughout the stadium as the damage adds up.

Ketty: They've been holding back I see.

Tirmek: Not with me. This isn't even the half of it.

Sarah: RrrrrraaaaaaaaawwwWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! !!!!

As Sarah hits her rage, she also manages to shift to hybrid form. She still couldn't go full Were, but this was enough. The battle takes on a new intensity as Elina struggles to keep up with her. Sarah begins beating her about like a volleyball, not even allowing her time to breathe before hitting her again. Elina finally manages to shift to shadow form, causing Sarah to pass right through her. She hits Sarah hard with a Bladeweaver combo, stunning her.

Gaz: Wow...and here I thought it was over.

Sithis: Rage is powerful, but not without it's pitfalls.

With the follow up strike, Sarah goes careening into the ground, leaving a small crater as Elina prepares her next attack. Elina dives, hoping to land another blow before Sarah could regain her senses. As she nears, Sarah shifts to shadow form and rises up to engulf Elina. Elina rears up and hightails it out of there, Sarah's shadow tendrils close behind. In midair, she turns and forms a shadow barrier. Sarah crashes into it, slightly stunned as she reforms.

Sarah again finds herself plummeting to the ground, this time in Elina's grip. She hated when Elina or Tirmek did this. Grabbing the back of her neck in this form always caused her to sieze up. She'd gotten better at overcoming the reaction, but it could be hard sometimes.

Sithis: Game over, it seems.

Tirmek: Keep watching...

Sarah again shifted to shadow form, encircling Elina and pushing her beneath her. In response, Elina did the same thing. The two continued to fight in shadow form all the way down. The impact sent them splattering across the arena floor.

Lisa: I'm not sure I'll ever get used to that...

Slowly but surely, the girls reform. However, they do not get up. They lie near each other laughing but unable to stand.

Elina: Way to bring your 'A' game.

Sarah: *returns to humanoid form* Did you have to grab the scruff of my neck again?

Elina: Yes, and I'll keep doing it till you get over that.

Sarah: That's what Tirmek said...

Satnak: All right, you slackers! Back on your feet! You've been holding out on me, so you owe me another 100 laps through the course!

Elina: But...we can't stand at the moment...

Satnak: That's no excuse! And here. You get another set of wieghts on top of your existing load.

Sarah: :weep:

Momo, Nina, & Deis: That was SO COOL! *tackles Sarah and ELina as they get up*

Scias: W-w-w-w............wow.

Sarah: :D At least this makes it worth it.

Elina: We'll see if you say that when we're done with Aunt Satnak's orders...

*meanwhile, off to the side*

Random student 1: *shudder*

Random student 2: How are we supposed to compete with that?

Random student 3: I know! Sarah's so cute, but all she ever pays attention to is that Tirmek!

Random student 1&2: :stare:

Random student 3: ...what?
rampant

12-31-06, 06:43 PM		Satnak - And you!

Tirmek - :confused:

Satnak - If your keeping up with them you can go another 100 with more weight as well.

Tirmek - GEH!

Random students - *Snigger*

Satnak - And you three! same drill!

RS's - :censored:

Satnak - The lot of you move it!

Momo, Scias, Dies, Nina, Teiza, Rip, Tear, and Corre - :(
-------------------------------------------------------

Kerrith - Why are they running laps around the lake of infernal ooze?

Lily - All I can get out of them is something about self preservation instincts.

Izzy - I didn't think cats ran laps.
lordalm

12-31-06, 07:05 PM		Chaos Lord ALM sits sipping tea and occasionally taking a bite of his crumpet as he reads the Sharn Inquisitive.

OOALM: I am Back!

CLALM: :rolleyes:

OOALM: Don't you want to know where I have been?

CLALM: Dosen't really matter to me. :bored:

OOALM: Why not!? :ahem:

CLALM: Because no one from this post who is an actual member of the crew cares what you do.

OOALM: :(

Chaos Lord ALM holds up a plate of crumpets.

CLALM: Care for a crumpet?

OOALM: :mad:

Arc of lightning slices through the air impacting sqaure in the Chaos Undivided icon chisled into Chaos Lord ALM's chest plate.

BOOM!

CLALM: :f:

OOALM concentrates....

CLALM: *gasps*

OOALM: Didn't I tell you to get onboard the FF?

CLALM: How? I can neither buy nor threaten anyone to go near that ship.

Suddenly a half-giant goes running by while an explosion rings out in the distance, the giant beginnings yelling something about chili recipies.

OOALM: :blink: I think you may want to follow that guy.

CLALM: :blink: Alright. :rolleyes:

Chaos Lord ALM begins running after the puny (next to him) half giant.

Waiter: Hey you didn't pay your bill!

OOALM concentrates.....Lightning bolt arcs through the sky.

Waiter: Oh cra :ghosted:
DungeonJman

12-31-06, 07:09 PM		Hey wait a minute, i just realized something.

*suddenly gets a new set of gear in his closet*

Apparently i'm only a paladin in Greyhawk, which means i can be a swordsage in Eberron, since nothing says that the material has to cross worlds. Unfortunately, it'll take a week to get full powers. But then i'll be able to figure out how to get the Rasangen as a strike and most of the other jutsu. Wish i could find a way to copy Kekkei Genkais' though, although doesn't seem like i can do that, since i'm not a part of any of the bloodlines.

Your Naruto geekiness knows no bounds.

Wait, since all of my sides are in Eberron, who are you?

Oh, this is just you talking to yourself, no idea why you're using the second person though.
rampant

12-31-06, 07:27 PM		Corre - Wow, Teiza look at this!

Teiza - What is it?

Corre - According to this the Legendary Blade-Wizard Opala I, founded a school called Eighty Empresses , That survives to this day!

Teiza - So?

Corre - So I could study there?

Teiza - Whats wrong with the Island?

Corre - Nothing, except ever since the Shadow Tiger horde ran through what is today known as Karnnath, only Rakshasa have had access to several schools, especially Shadow Hand, and Desert wind.

Teiza - Certainly Maladren, or maybe Tirmek-

Corre - Maladren is an outcast, and Tirmek has no power in their Hierarchy unless he accepts the Title of Knightmare prince.

Teiza - Well then we find a tutor!

Corre - Who might be as good as one of the teachers at EE?

Teiza - Squeeze the secrets out of a Naityan!

Corre - I don't think you're pronouncing that right, and no way!

Teiza - MOM! MOTHER!
SilvercatMoonpaw

12-31-06, 07:51 PM		Announcer Lady: Will the E.B.N.E.s known as rampant and Kazier-Ryu please update the wiki on you children? E.B.N.E.s rampant and Kazier-Ryu, please update the wiki on you children.

OOcat: It's way too hard to remember these people otherwise.
*********
NJ26 appears from a puff of smoke in front of Teiza and Corre.

Corre: Jaela? :confused:

NJ26: We must not have met: I'm the 26th ninja clone of Jaela. And I believe I have a solution to your collective problem.

Teiza: You know a teacher here who knows maneuvers and stances?

NJ26: Not here, no. On the lower decks of the FF. We've aquired a clan of Oriental Adventures tengu, and they're really into blade magic. I'm sure they'd be willing to teach Corre.

Teiza: That won't work: I want Corre to come here to school.

NJ26: :thinks: ………………Possibly could get one interested in teaching here.

OOC: Just trying to expand interest in the lower decks.
rampant

12-31-06, 07:59 PM		Satnak - I'd have to see this place myself, and your not getting out of my training, you'll just have to keep up your routines in your spare time.

Corre - Yes mother.

Serene - And you have to come home for the breaks, and call us if anything goes wrong.

Corre - Of course Mom.

Teiza - Not happening! No she can't just up and leave!

Serene - Of course not. This will be carefully considered, but you must admit, it has potencial.

Teiza - She's not ready! She barely keep up in a match against me, and Dorvos just smokes her every time!

Corre - All the more reason for me to find a place to study my art.

Teiza - ... :blink: , did she just?

Corre - I finally won an argument with you:P
------------------------------------------------------

OOC: Um I'm not familiar with editing wiki. I can put their names in the column, but I don'y know how to link to or create an article page for them.
Kaizer_Ryu

12-31-06, 08:23 PM		OOC: Um I'm not familiar with editing wiki. I can put their names in the column, but I don'y know how to link to or create an article page for them.
It's the script format that creates a link. I can take care of it if you like while I'm there.
DungeonJman

12-31-06, 08:33 PM		pfffft.

Shadow Hand actually isn't that hard. Most of it is just taking away the light in an area, while simultaneously creating a shadow effect. Now, by normal physics this is impossible, but there are precedents for a seperate shadow existing from the absence of light (Mabar being an example), which can explains why it has an actual physical result, and why some of those strikes deal cold damage. For example:

*creates a Shadow Garrote and throws it onto the Forgotten Freedom*

Wait, that probably wasn't a good thing.
ratslinky

12-31-06, 08:43 PM		I don't know how to work wiki either but seeing as i only have one char it's not so much of a matter i guess. I'll find out how to do it myself or if somone else is willing to do it i'll write up his stats and email/PM them.
rampant

12-31-06, 09:47 PM		To OOKaizer : Yes please

To DungeonJ : I've had this plot in mind since before Corre was born, no offense.
DungeonJman

12-31-06, 10:05 PM		Ok, but i'm just worried about the Shadow Garrote, considering that it was thrown by an E.B.N.E. it's sharp, and has gone fast enough to reach terminal velocity.

*scene switches to a ship chasing the Forgotten Freedom*

Captain: Finally, we have caught up to them. Some called us crazy for tracking the most dangerous ship in Eberron, but today, they shall go down!

SCREEEEEECH

Captain: What was that?

*A la "One Piece" the Garrote goes straight through the ship, slicing it in two*

Lawful DungeonJ: But... :twitch: That's not physically possible *faints*

Oh wait, since he's a part of me *feels sort of faint*
rampant

12-31-06, 11:45 PM		Dorvos - Hm ... Hm ... Hm

Lily - How does she do that?

Izzy - Ok I know your desperate, but dorvos is a guy, and too young for that.

Lily - No I mean the cat.

Kerrith - I know its crazy, there he is doing pull ups with his tail, and the cat is still sleeping on his head. Does it have a reverse gravity charm? no... More like a subjective gravity effect on his head.
ratslinky

12-31-06, 11:56 PM		OORatslinky: Okay since I got the go ahead from Kaizer and rampant i am doing this years Island Racing Finals. Here is the system for the races it will be a knock out between the final four competitors.

Terra, Lisa, Satnak, Serene, and verious other crew members who might be intrested watch as the race master calls out the finalests for the racing for Elina, Sarah, Tirmek, Sithis, and Gaz's class wait for names of the finalists.

RM: and the first finalist for iiiiisss :rimshot: TIIIRRMMEK

Crowd: :cheer: :cheer:

RM: And the second finalist iiiisss :rimshot: SSSAAAARRRAAAHHH

Crowd: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer:

RM: The third finalist iiiissss :rimshot: ELLLIIINNNNAAAA

Crowd: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer:

RM: And the fourth finalist iiisss :rimshot: GGAAAZZZZZZ

Crowd: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer:

RM: The race's start in 1 hour ladys and gentlemen and heraphrodites.

OORatslinky: I'll post more soon just need to get some ideas for the races
ratslinky

01-01-07, 12:03 AM		oh and kaizer shouldn't sarah and elina be in second generation in the wiki. on that note rampant can you please put tirmeks stats on wiki. thanks to both of you if you do
Charles Phipps

01-01-07, 12:10 AM		Guys, I'm hugely impressed with the updates.
rampant

01-01-07, 12:14 AM		Teiza - How can you even consider this!?

Satnak - Its simple shehas reached the limit of my ability to instruct her in her chosen path. No one here can match The EE according to her so we need to scout it out atleast.

Teiza - Fine but I'm coming with.

Terra - 6:42

An arrow made of shadows springs from Teiza's hand to strike ketler square in the forehead.

Serene - No you can't come.
Crystalforged

01-01-07, 12:22 AM		Crystalforged is still doing arts and crafts in the Death Camp of Tolerance. Several other crew members have died of exhaustion already. Don't worry they were the old ones no one cared about any more, like Jam. Crystalforged himself is looking malnourished being almost skeletally thin. A chain around his leg prevents him from fleeing

Crystalforged: (finishing a crayon drawing of multicultural couples) Can't go on... Much longer... (falling on floor) I see the tunnel... I'm going towards the light... (convulses suddenly) The light... Its gone... There is only shadows now... mommy...

Oh suck it up you great whiner.

Crystalforged: YOU! Your that new voice that has appeared in my head! You still haven't explained who you are.

Tee hee, I just gave you a clue. You're a big boy, you figure it out.

Crystalforged: :bored: Indulge me.

Fine fine.

*a new figure condenses out of Crystalforged's shadow. The figure is small and impish with patches of both white and black skin with blue lines glowing on certain areas of her body. A tuft of red hair extends out a stone helmet which covers one of her eyes.*

Crystalforged: :nonono: This is a symptom of my extreme obscession with Twilight Princess isn't it?

Minda: Oh, your a smart one I see.

Crystalforged: No need to get all sarcastic. Now are you going to get me out of here or not?

Minda: (chating nonchalantly) Maybe. There might be a few conditions first.

Crystalforged: I'm not exactly in a position to refuse you, just spit it out.

Minda: You don't to get the exercise any control over me the way you leash Kanatash and I would like to be introduced into onto the ship at some point. Oh and I want top billing too.

Crystalforged: Fine, fine. Now can you just get me out of here?

Minda: (tweaking Crystalforged's nose) Of course I just have one last thing I want to do. (Pulls out a black crystal)

Crystalforged: Oh, no. You woul-

Minda: :devil: (touches crystal to Crystalforged's forehead)

*Crystalforged goes into convulsions again. His face elongates and fur grows all over his body. After a few moments he has fully assumed the form of a wolf.*

Crystalforged: (looking himself over) Meh, I've been in more embarrassing positions before. OOF! (Minda plops down heavily on his back) Was that entirely necessary?

Minda: (broad smile) No.

Crystalforged: I figured as much.

*Minda conjures a sphere of black energy which she uses to slice the chain on Crystalforged's ankle*

Minda: (slaps Crystalforged's sides) Giddy up now wolfy, we've got places to be.

Crystalforged: Grrrrr.
Crystalforged

01-01-07, 01:18 AM		Well its a little past Midnight here for me, and I just thought I would wish you all a happy new year. (raises glass) To bring forth insanity once again in this new year.
rampant

01-01-07, 01:34 AM		Kithle - 10k cases of various explosives

Death paper - Check

Kithle - Enough booze to drown Jarlot

Death paper - Check

Kithle - Ok then wheel this load out and get the next one ready, this party is picking up speed.
ratslinky

01-01-07, 01:38 AM		OORatslinky: Okay I don't know how far i'll get in this post but i will give you the match ups. The Race master is now called Honda.

Honda: Now for the pairings we will have Gaz vs. Tirmek and Sarah vs. Elina. First up is Elina vs. Sarah get to your starting places.

Terra: Wow this should be good.

Sarah: Prepare to eat dust sis :smirk:

Elina: In your dreams

Honda: Three... Two... One... GO!

*Both the girls fly of the starting line for the start of their ten lap race*

OORatslinky: Both their boards are slightly sleeker than Tirmeks but still larger than average. Now on with the story.

*As they reach the quarter mark of the first lap neck and neck Sarah suddleny drops to her knees clutching her head and she fall back 100ft. with such an obvious lead the casaul observer would think the race is over when suddenly Elina is almost knocked off her board by a palpable psionic force. she is forced to slow considerbly as she try to regain her balance allowing Sarah to overtake. As Sarah go's by she hits Elina square in the face flipping the skiff. but Elina still manages to hold on and wright herself. Elina slowy catches up as she is trying to pass Sarah moves her skiff to block Elina's and if she looks like she is going to overtake throws a punch. Finaly after five laps Elina manages to get along side manifesting her mindblade as she does so, with a quick slash she hamstrings Sarah*

Sarah: You shouldn't have done that. RRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH

*As Sarah fly into a rage she gives Elina a right hook then an uppercut with the later punch going into shadow form as Elina trys to avoid her by going shadow form. as Elina's skiff flys back away from Sarah. Elina focused and a bolt of lightning hit Sarah who just growled and gave her skiff a boost of speed*

OORatslinky: I can't think of much more so i'll skip to the final scene in the last lap.

* With Sarah's rage wheiring off Elina was able to catch up in the final lap. Elina threw her mindblade into Sarahs hurt leg as she tried to catch up*

Sarah: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH :weep:

Elina: *passing Sarah* looks like i'm gonna win sis so much for me eating dust

Sarah: WHY YOU!

Elina: :hides: oops i think i really upset her *gets knocked clean off her skiff landing on her butt on the deep cyrsteel* ow :weep:

*And then Sarah flys past the finish line and promtly falls of holding her knee*

Honda: AANND SSSAAARRRRRAAAAAAAAHHH is the winner of the semi finals

OORatslinky: Feel free to insert extra fight sences in the laps I didn't show I was just running out of ideas. And sorry about any bad spelling or gramma in this post
Kaizer_Ryu

01-01-07, 02:00 AM		Ok, I've got the Wiki's updated for the kids. I'll get to Terra and Lisa later, as well as a few things I'm gonna add to the 'Other Content' category.
DungeonJman

01-01-07, 04:28 AM		Can you guys put a link to the wiki here? It's a real pain in the rear to have to search through the old archives.
cypher_zero

01-01-07, 04:32 AM		http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Main_Page
rampant

01-01-07, 04:52 AM		Teiza - I can just almost wrap my brain around this one.

Terra - (i.h.h. sweet me this kid is scary smart) We can work on Shadow travel when we get back.

Teiza - Lets see your precious sages do that.

Corre - Let's see Terra out fight a Blade master without spending half an hour buffing. No offense

Terra - None taken

Satnak - Its ... not very big.

Corre - Its a lot more selective than One Eye Mother.

Teiza - Snobs
DungeonJman

01-01-07, 05:27 AM		*Nobby is seen in the lower decks fighting a horde of Agent Smiths. The GTSLSWGOTTSOLS has been blown up in an awesome explosion, when one of the Smith's attacked it by messing with reality.*

Nobby: A little help here?

Oh sure.

*materializes in swordsage armor, in a cloud of light, before it dissipates.*

Nobby: Hey! No ripping off stuff from your games.

Look, can i help it if i liked Arkantos's entering method from Age of Mythology: the Titans?
Anyway.

*The Guardian appears and starts slashing up a bunch of Smiths before enough of them turn it into a Smith.*

Ohhhhhhhhhhh great!

*Summons the Atlantean Titan, mass carnage ensues*

Nobby: Ok, so you got rid of all of the Smiths, somehow. But: HOW DO WE STOP A TITAN.

Simple

*Osiris appears and lightning bolts the Titan to death*

Nobby: AND WHAT ABOUT OSIRIS???

We just wait for Satnak to show up,.
lordalm

01-01-07, 08:47 AM		Since I'd like to join the crew what do I need to do to make it official? You all seem to be playing an actuall game along with these posts.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-01-07, 08:52 AM		Wright your posts in the blood of the sane, and Post Charles Philips your soul ;) Kidding, were all basicly making it up as we go along.

Edit: Seriously: Become an Entity from Beyond Non Existance like the rest of us (EBENE) Dont 'join the crew' Dont 'join the crew'.

Also Happy new year every one!
Charles Phipps

01-01-07, 09:02 AM		Well, to be honest, no one is going to confuse the New Adventures of the Forgotten Freedom for a serious game. We've got CR19 fiend/angel hybrids, a Solar Deva, a Demigod Captain, centuries old player characters, metanarration, and a walking plus golem carpenter.

That's part of its charm.

The game originally started out as essentially just a list of to dos and don'ts from the antics of my home game before slowly everyone started adding to the list with their own wild antics and gradually characters evolved from it as the jokes spread.

Now it occupies its own sort of parody verse. Tragically, Keith Baker has never read it.

Oddly, though, somewhere along the lines everyone actually started to care about their characters. Hence, why there's an occasional serious plotline that helps sustain the humor and traces of character development.
lordalm

01-01-07, 09:04 AM		Oh goody! :schemes:
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-01-07, 10:17 AM		Bunny (watching the excessive violence of the skiff races: KILL SOMEONE ALREADY!

Silver: I thought you liked them.

Bunny: I meant kill some random idiot. You know how I hate non-lethal violence.

Silver: What defines and idiot?

Bunny: Anybody within 20 miles of this island who's not Char-Opped to death.
lordalm

01-01-07, 10:25 AM		OOALM: *concentrates*

Crack Boom!!!

Happless waiters distant cousin: My distant cousin was reported dead today by freak lightn :ghosted:

Singed guy just talking to HWDC: :OMG!

OOALM: Happy?

Bunny: :ayyyy!:
lordalm

01-01-07, 10:58 AM		Chaos Lord ALM: *Running just behind Norbaz sees the ship pursuing the FF suddenly destroyed by what appears to be a simple garrot falling through the air. Plotting its trajectory and taking into account wind currents he figures the Half-Giant is a gonner. Thinks about it for a few more seconds and then mentally shrugs. Reaches out and grabs the Half-Giant by the head and then leaps into the air. Calling upon the forces of Chaos with his powers of sorcery granted by his patron entity, Chaos Lord Alm streaks like a star to alight upon the stern of the FF. The dying of scores of incients from the garrot and the briefly freed Chaos Demons can be heard far below.*

Norbaz: *Holding his poor almost crushed head and looking back forth to the streets of Sharn below and the strange armored figure next to him* Ah thanks?

Chaos Lord ALM: I needed to be aboard this vessel and you seemed to be aquainted with it and its crew.

Norbaz: Well, yes. :uh-huh:

Choas Lord ALM: You will tell me all that you know in exchange for sparing your life. Starting with this Chili you spoke of. *Stern glowering glance*

Norbaz: (i.h.h: :looloo: ) Sure not a problem, lets go below decks...

Random Redshirt Deckhand: Hey how did you two get on board?

Chaos Lord ALM: *Looks down upon the igansificant form before him. Pulls his Bolt Pistol with its rounds recently enchanted to contain warp daemons. The satisfying screaming of the daemon as the round leaves the pistol, to be followed by the distinct explosion and screaming of the Redshirt as its soul is devoured by the daemon puts a contented smile on the Chaos Lords face.*

Norbaz: (i.h.h.: okay a dangerous :looloo: . should fit right in around here....)
Phantomcrossing

01-01-07, 01:43 PM		Norbaz: Well, the chili is something I cooked up a long time ago. Its more affective than Alchemist fire and acid....its kind of a catch all weapons grade material. Some extradimensional versions of the captain sucked my knowledge of how to make it and its various incarnations from my head. I relearned how to make the original recipe through experimentation and skill, then I learned from someone how to make it a more dangerous weapon, and a heart and soul warming meal.

The half giant holds out a Termos.

Norbaz: Try some, its great....just mind the fact that Satnak will chage in here and tackle me in the next -OOF

Satnak: CHILI, NOW! PLEASE!
rampant

01-01-07, 01:46 PM		DungeonJ - ...

Nobby - She's in a plot isn't she. :bored:

DungeonJ - ...

Nobby - We're screwed aren't we?
------------------------------------------------

Satnak - So whats the process on getting in?

Headmistress (i'll give her a name later if i feel like it) - Well first of all there's the paperwork

Satnak - That's a given, there's always paperwork.

Headmistress - You teach too, huh?

Satnak - Correct

Headmistress - Then the next part id of course the first test, Corre would be placed in Opala I's chambers and left alone as long as she deems necesarry. After she leaves one of the 1080 ribbons will be removed. She must correctly state the color of the removed ribbon, if correct she will be accepted and be expected to wear that ribbon in some fashion from this day forward. If she is wrong however she will never be accepted here and we advise you to try the monastery near Q'barra or seek a tutor amongst the hobgoblins and gith.

Serene - My daughter may require some special consideration.

Headmistress - Such as?

Corre - I don't require a bed, I have no need for sleep.

Headmistress - We are a bit strapped for space...Anything else?

Corre - I need clothes that fit my tails.

Headmistress - We keep a seamstress on staff to teach the girls how to alter the standard garments without violating dresscode.

Satnak - Is it allright if she wears the weights?

Headmistress - I'd have to have them checked to make sure they're not some sort of hidden boosters.

Satnak - Understood.

Serene - The next consideration is the living crystal.

Headmistress - What?

Corre lashes out with a whip of living ruby and swings herself up into the rafters, the shapes wings and glides down.

Headmistress - *sigh* Just don't use it in class.

Corre - Thankyouthankyou-

Headmistress - Save it for when and if you pass the entance examination, we have four other girls trying out for the openings in the next semester. Assuming you pass you'll start then. Come back next week if you're still interested.

Corre - I'll be there.

Teiza - Not if I can help it.
----------------------------------

Back at the freedom

Teiza, Corre, Satnak - I smell chili!
------------------------------------------

Headmistress - Oiy a kid from the dreaded FF.

Secretary - So how do we deal with the little mutant.

Headmistress - See if she passes and have her file sealed if she does. We don't need this leaking out.
lordalm

01-01-07, 02:58 PM		Chaos Lord ALM: *Looks askew down on the being he believes might be this Satnak that the half giant was speaking of. He decideds that it might be unwise to put a bolt shell into him as the vagauely sexuall way that Satnak has mounted the half giant while he gobbels down the "chili" has Chaos Lord ALM considering some nice spells of Slannesh to control Satnak with. A slow evil smile creeps across Chaos Lord ALM's face*

Norbaz: Oh god the horror! :gah: Get him off me! :help: Stop doing that to my leg Satnak! :yuck:
rampant

01-01-07, 04:14 PM		I'm going to ignore the part where you called Satnak "he"
--------------------------------------------------------------------

Satnak - Get in that kitchen now!

Norbaz - Yes'm *yoink*

Satnak - Hey newbie!
ratslinky

01-01-07, 07:02 PM		OORatslinky: Okay i'm going to do Tirmek and Gaz's race now it will probably have more detail cause ive had more time to think about it. Before start the race i should probably describe gaz's skiff as i have a cool scene for the finals. His skiff is very thin (think shoe size but on a skiff) and unausally he is strapped into it. It has some cool powers that i will reveal later. Oh and by the way bunny there going to be more violence without anyone dying so :P. Now i am going to talk on and on for a while. so any

Everyone: GET ON WITH IT!

OORatslinky: Ok ok chill. Now for the story

Honda: 3... 2... 1... GO!

*As Tirmek and Gaz fly off into the sunset a giant foot squashes the scene*

OORatslinky: There you are happy?

OOKaizer: That was bull**** do the real race or i'll respectivly ask that Elina use the DM Breaker 2.5

OORatslinky: not the DM Breaker! :hides: ok i'll do the real race just please let me retain my insanity

*As Tirmek and Gaz off the starting line almost imideatly shines like the sun the the light flys from him straight at Tirmek and at the same time Gaz disapears into thin air. Before Tirmek can recover he suddenly feels the urge to jump off his skiff and Gaz reapears*

Tirmek: I'm not going down that easily :ahem:

Gaz: What are you talking about *looks overly innocent*

Tirmek: GRRR *Maninfests his hammer and swings it at Gaz who narrowly dodges and replies by swinging round behind him and gives tirmek a crossbow bolt to the behind* ARR die *He whirled round and took another swing. This time managing to give a good hard blow to the noggin*

Gaz: *The hammer blow landed hard and he was knocked onto his back instintivly he continued the movent reloading his crossbow as he did so. As he came up he launched another bolt this time at the leg he couldn't miss at pointblank range and this time he was using poison on his bolt*

Tirmek: *Usaully Tirmek could ignore such a small bolt but this time he felt his nerves going numb and he relised what it was* Using poison on your bolts oh your crafty Gaz i should have expected that *At the same time he tryed to pull out the bolt but found he couldn't move them. But then he found some inner reserve of power (not to inner mind you just some testostrone) and focused his mind he tracked down the poison and purged it from his body*

OORatslinky: Sorry rampant if i'm not giving Tirmeks full power against Gaz but i don't have any of the books that his classes are drawn from if so please notify me and i'll up his power in the second part of the race but right now I have to do the washing up. and again sorry for any bad spelling or gramma
Charles Phipps

01-01-07, 09:02 PM		Miko: Oh hell.

Elina: MIKO!

Lilly: Elina!

Ivy: Brother!

Janet: Brad!

Brad: Janet!

Frank'N'Furter: ROCKY!

*Lilly ignores the production going on in the adjoining room*

Miko: Curse you! You've figured out my plot! I've hypnotized Lilly with my powers of persuasion and suggestion ability in order to make him think that he was making love to you. After all this time of plotting and secretly pretending to be your friend, at last my true agenda is revealed!

Elina: I just thought you were having sex with Lilly.

Miko: Curses!

Elina:...and you only pretended to be my friend? To get with Lilly?

Miko: Not just to get with Lilly! To also make sure you didn't turn into my mother! I thought you were cool but you're doing everything that lead her to become the Queen of Darkness.

Elina: I'm not going to be evil though.

Miko: Yeah, uh huh. That's why you're still listening to the Shadow!

Elina: I'M GOOD!

Miko: Lilly! Smite her!

Lilly: NO!

Miko: You know what the missing stanza from the book is? It says she'll kill Sarah as part of her ascension to become Dark Queen. Do you want that on your conscience!? Protect your friends!

Elina: No....

Lilly: I'm through with being a pawn!

Miko: The shadow whispers that she's going to be evil and convicnes her SHE'S GOOD and by that very act allows her to kill Sarah because she will manifest the Mark of Death soon!

Elina: NO!

Lilly: I won't....

Elina: THIS IS YOUR FAULT LILLY! YOU'VE CORRUPTED HER WITH YOUR LIES!

*Elina throws a fireball at him*
Phantomcrossing

01-01-07, 09:26 PM		Norbaz: Ah, my old kitchen, my old cutlery. Everything I need. Now to hope the captain doesn't figure out I'm back and hope I don't get saddled with any extenuating ridiculous duties.
rampant

01-01-07, 09:46 PM		Satnak, Teiza, and Corre hold up bowls - Chili?

Norbaz - On it! (i.h.h. kyber's sock drawer 3 of them!)
rampant

01-01-07, 10:59 PM		Teiza - Think about what you would be giving up! Chili! What if They don't let you keep Tear while you're there?

Corre - I'll burn that bridge when I get to it.
Charles Phipps

01-01-07, 11:29 PM		OOC: Note the opinions do not reflect what actually occurred via PM. Only an exaggerated parody.

OOKaizer: *sulk*

OOCharles: *sigh*

Rose: What's the problem?

OOCharles: Kaizers unhappy that his plotline with Kistune is ruined.

Rose: You mean after being revealed as an evil force of the Shadow, she's revealed AGAIN as an evil force of the Shadow?

OOKaizer: Well when you point out that way, it loses a lot of the subtlety. At heart, Kistune is a trickster figure....

Rose: KILL IT! KILL IT NOW!

Elina: NO! I LOVE MY LITTLE FOXGIRL!

Lilly: Can we retcon it to something that doesn't involve me being killed by Elina?

OOKaizer: No, that's pretty much my plan as well. That and making Kitsune into a cute Foxgirl physical presence I can love :cloud9:

Kitsune: :sweat drop:

OOCharles: Well it beats my plot of making Elina get kidnapped and rescued by Lilly.

Zella: That's me and Rose's stichke! As well as hopelessly derivative!

OOCharles: Bah! Repackage it and the foolish masses will never know the difference!

Miko: I say go with Kaizer Ryu's plan! I don't want to be a bad guy!

OOCharles: You're a succubus!
DungeonJman

01-02-07, 01:03 AM		*seeing that Satnak is busy, he decides to pull out all the stops and takes out what looks like a bunch of wands put together*

Nobby: Wait, if this is that thing from Nodwick, then i will kill you.

DungeonJ: But you won't if i save your life.

Nobby: If you save my... I walked right into that one didn't I? But you don't have any ranks in UMD!!!

DungeonJ: No time to worry about that. ABRACAPOCOLYPSE!

*explosion of epic god-killing proportions*

DungeonJ: Well, that worked. *notices* WOOHOO!!! I just got a ton of XP for doing that!

Nobby: But you had to resort to a stupid wand containing every spell in existence!

DungeonJ:Yes, but i learned to never let Agent Smith come to the Forgotten Freedom, ever again. That's got to be worth something.

Nobby: Why is it that every time you're involved in a plot, there has to be an explosion of epic proportions.

DungeonJ: Can't help it, it's a part of the E.B.N.E. weirdness and insanity power flux field.
________________________________________ ___________

Evil DungeonJ: No response, wow the E.B.N.E.'s do take forever in responding.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-02-07, 01:50 AM		Lilly: :eek: Counterspell!

Miko: Stop it!

Elina: You shut up! I don't know where you got the idea that I'm doing anything but what I want to, but don't you dare insult my best friend!

Miko: Your "best friend" will get us all killed! I will be damned if I'm going to let you grow into that horrible b*tch who raised me!

Elina: You act as if that's inevitable! What is it about me that screams "I'M GOING TO BE EVIL AND DESTROY EVERYTHING WHEN I GROW UP" ?! It's a lie! A big fat lie to keep me from setting this world free!

Miko: Free? I've seen that world! Your unholy alliance will bring everything to naught!

Elina: And you are one to be trusted, Succubus? Where is your proof? My words? My deeds?

Miko: I...

Lilly: Is she telling the truth? Are you really in the Shadow's council?

Elina: Is that even a fair question from a pawn of Dol Arrah?

Lilly: I told you I'm through with that!

Elina: Oh, really? So you're saying you have the strength of will to block out her influence now, but you couldn't stop yourself from killing your own brother?!

Lilly: That's not-!

Elina: You were too weak! You wouldn't do it yourself, so she forced your hand! You murdered your own flesh and blood, and now you expect me to believe you can keep yourself from doing the very same thing to me?!

Lilly: ...is that what you thought happened all these years? :(

Elina: What else am I supposed to think?!

Lilly: Elina...I care deeply for my brother. So much so that I just couldn't sit by and watch his soul be devoured by Khyber. I wanted to free him. I broke the Claw of Khyber, I defeated him in battle, I even tried to force Khyber out. Nothing worked. What choice did I have? Let my brother live on as a shell of his former self, cursed to be the pawn of Khyber and the Keeper for the rest of his life? I ask you, what would you have done if it had been Sarah in Ivy's place? What would you have done differently?

Elina: ...

Lilly: :( I don't want to be put in that position again. I don't want to feel like my heart is being torn in two. I couldn't bear it if the same thing happened to you. I know all too well the pain your sister would feel.

Elina: :whatsthis So this is some desperate act of altruism with benefits? Is that why you refuse to leave me be?

Lilly: No! I don't want you to be tricked into doing something you'll regret!

Elina: And there it is. You come in and rescue me from the darkness, I swoon over my savior, and you finally get into my pants, right?

Lilly: Dammit, Elina! That isn't it at all! Do you really not get it, or are you just refusing to?!

Miko: When he thought I was you, he said so many kind things... I wanted to hear him say that about me, but he really does-*GURK*

One of Elina's mindblades forms into a whip, which she has wrapped around Miko's neck.

Elina: *eyes burning with fury* Quiet, traitor! You pretend to be my friend for your own gain, then let this lackey of the Host convince you that I'm the pawn!

Lilly: Stop it, Elina! She may not need to breathe, but you could break her neck!

Elina: That's the implicit threat, yes.

Lilly: Elina...do you really hate me that much?

Elina: Perhaps. There was a time when I really thought I could trust you, maybe even love you. But I saw that I can never be truly safe around you. You are merely the Host's errand boy, the one they go to when they need to have a pest exterminated. They have controlled this world for too long to let me or anyone else take it from them.

Lilly: Is that what this is about?! You think the Host is out to kill you too?! They're supposed to help you break the Dragon's hold over the world!

Elina: Feh! Spoken like a true pawn. Who told you this? Your precious Sovereign?

Lilly: The Traveler.

Somewhat taken aback, Elina loosens her grip on the whip, giving Miko the chance to slip free. She goes nowhere, but merely slumps into a corner and listens.

Lilly: Will you listen now?

Elina: ...heh. Nice try. But I'm not going to fall for your lies again!

With her last word, she lashes out and catches Lilly around the neck with her whip. She quickly drags him forward, landing a punch that dents his armor. As he doubles over, Elina comes down hard with a warhammer mindblade, knocking him to the floor, gasping for breath.

Miko: *jumps to her feet* No!

In an instant, Miko finds herself pinned to the wall behind her, a mindblade spear protruding from her shoulder. The holy power infused into the weapon burns white hot in the wound. Looking down at Lilly, Elina forms a longsword midblade and prepares to finish the job.

Elina: I hoped I wouldn't have to do this, but if you're going to turn everyone against me, I cannot let you live. I refuse to live hunted like some animal!

When she prepares to strike, she stops. Intensely powerful images flood her mind. These are not protents of things to come, nor are they the dark dreams she has had of late. No, these are memories almost forgotten.

Her first meeting with Lilly. The way his spoonyness annoyed her, but his enthusiasm and boyish charm slowly grew on her. His first beating with the Hammer of Healing. The combination of sadness and hope that reflected in his eyes when he had asked for her help in reviving his mother. So many images. Pleasant images. Feelings of peace and tranquility she had thought forever lost in the aftermath of Ivy's death.

Both the mindblade pinning Miko and the one in her hand dissipated. Elina turned and walked out of the room, tears streaming down her face. As she leaves, Lilly is finally able to speak again.

Lilly: Elina...I love you.

Unfortunately, his voice is too weak to be heard.

-----

Elina: :weep: How long has it been since I really cried?

Kitsune: Not since you accepted my help.

Elina: It's been that long? Oh, gods, what have I become?!

Kitsune: You have become your own per-

Elina: SHUT UP! I don't want to hear a peep out of you till I say so! I almost killed Lilly, for Mom's sake!

Kitsune: But now he will continue to-

Elina: I TOLD YOU TO SHUT UP! I am not the scared little girl I was back then! I will work this out on my own!

Silence reigns for several minutes as the Shadow tries to process where his hold had failed.

Kitsune: ...very well. Call on me when you wish. But mark my words. He can bring you nothing but pain.
DungeonJman

01-02-07, 02:16 AM		*looks at the previous conversation from back in the real world and sighs*

Oh, i hoped that if i couldn't do anything that i would at least be right. But i'm afraid not, they're doomed to the fate which has been prewritten for them, in the end, they will be nothing more than shadows and dust and pawns in the world-wide game of chess.

Well, this is terrible, my posts are beginning to resemble Poe poems! I really need the good part of me in order to cheer up.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-02-07, 02:28 AM		I must have failed horribly in getting my point across, I guess. Your interpretation of that exchange was way off. Whether this is a good thing or bad thing, I'll leave up to you. :D ;)
ratslinky

01-02-07, 03:34 AM		OORatslinky: Ok now that i'm back... I need to remember where is was up to. Oh and OOKaizer could you let me know when your storyline is happening in the timeline of my storyline i think it best if it happens in the space between the semi finals and the grand final. that space is about a week. anyway on with the race.

Gaz: *Gaz :) as tirmek was purging the poison it had done exatly what he needed and with that he sent his thought to invade Tirmek's mind*

Tirmek: *As he purged the poison he felt somthing wasn't right then he finished it and he felt as if his head was about to explode. A thousand different thoughts flew threw his mind and all of them hostile. Tirmek screamed the thought assaulting his mind where unbearable but he'd gone thru alot of unbearable in his life and he managed to push thru. As his vision cleared he saw Gaz fade. As he went to use his powers to see thru the invisiblity he saw somthing else. He saw Sarah getting stabbed thru the neck by Elina* NNOOOOOOOO :weep: :weep:

Narrator: The brave Tirmek raced towards his lovely Sarah and as he did so his grief turned to rage

Tirmek: :headexplo die Elina *as he flew out of the crystal ring he jumped from he skiff and swung at Elina it would have been a square blow to the head but it passed right thru*
Elina you ***** how could you kill her die now *his incarnum hammer glowed with power that would let him hit her even in shadow he swung viciously and it went thru her chest only then did he notice Sarah face had turned it a smiling one of Gaz. He wirled round to see Gaz go round for his 7th lap and Sarah and Elina on the other side of the track. he quickly picked up his skiff and raced back onto the track. He new he could never beat Gaz thru speed now he'd have to knock him out*

Esabar: Hey Gaz

Gaz: Yeah?

Esabar: I'd try to stay a long way away form Tirmek if i where you

Gaz: Say wh-aaaaaaaaaagggghhhhhhh

Tirmek: Revenge :hoppingma *Gaz fell quickly and Tirmek flew on when suddenly Gaz was in front of him the speeding away before Tirmek could catch up*

Gaz: *After Timeks first 2 hits Gaz had cast an ilussion of himself falling to the ground and at the same time he cast invisibility on himself he it took a couple of laps to catch up and pass Tirmek and then he felt his invisibility fade. He quickly put on a burst of speed and it didn't take long to get to the finish line*

Honda: And Gaz wins the semi final the grand final will be in one week goodbye *Honda promtly downed 10 bottles of beer*

OORatslinky: Hoped you guys liked it if not then *Draws out the E.B.N.E return to sanity gun* so who didn't like it :devil:
rampant

01-02-07, 03:37 AM		OOC: I'm not a big fan of Tirmek loosing his cool, but everyone's allowed a few bad days. Other than that ok. SO POINT THAT THING SOMEWHERE ELSE!
--------------------------------------------------------------

Elina - I need to blow off some steam.

Elina enters a space in Terra's demi plane where illusory beasts roam.

Elina - Hyah!

A bolt of lightning streams forth through a formations of zombies, at each point where a zombie was struch Elna's spiked chain mindblade has twisted itself around the target. As single flick as the blade returns to normal size sends the shrapnel into the face of the next beast, a massive clay golem. Shifting her chain into a trident she hurls it forth within a wave spell turning the fighting fork into a weapon of incredible stopping power.

A troop of Ice devils spreads out hoping to avoid the zombies fate. Elina summons forth her blade once more this time as a chakram infused with flame. Elina hurls the spinning conflaguration at the first of the fiends. It's flames burst out upon impact and sends the flaming disc at the next devil, and the sequence repeats until the Flame spell is exhausted.

----------------------------------------------------------------
OOC: Hopes this helps anyone trying to write for her bladeweaver abilities in the future. It helps to remember, "blade and spell are one".
-------------------------------------------------------

Terra - No Teiza, I'm not going to help you destroy the EE.
ratslinky

01-02-07, 03:55 AM		OORatslinky: Don't worry rampant your my friend :angelhide. My thing with him losing his cool is supposed to show that Gaz hit a soft spot with ilussion of Sarah dieing. Tirmek then got really upset about that and went a bit overboard in his reaction.
ratslinky

01-02-07, 05:39 AM		OORatslinky: Wow slow day. The following scene is of Gaz getting ready for his party

IC:

Gaz: Portal to the elemental plane of beer?

Esabar: Almost done

Gaz: Good Rose is complaining about the cost but Jarlot has agreed to pay for it if I make a portal to the plane of beer. Now fire works and I mean fireworks that don't blow half the ship up.

Esabar: Got them and all the food and funny hats.

Gaz: Good i'm going to bed now
Charles Phipps

01-02-07, 07:39 AM		It's okay, DungeonJman is just following what we know as Paladinitis.

Lilly: Huh?

It's a quality of making everything ambigious seem dark and foreboding.

Lilly: What a quality that dooms us!
DungeonJman

01-02-07, 07:55 AM		Wow, i didn't know that it was possible to get Paladinitis as a swordsage. No wait a minute, it's a personality thing, not a class thing.

Evil DungeonJ: *via scroll of message* Use the stupid instant death combo on someone already!

Leave me alone! You're not in my head now, i don't have to listen to you!
Lord Kale Fangblade

01-02-07, 08:49 AM		Sithis set out the summoning circle in chalk, making sure the sigils and runes where correct. it would tax him to his limits to keep the circle sealed as it was. any flaw in its form and it would break free. Sithis formed the other defensive circle about the required recepticle; a new staff. he'd spent the last four days preparing it. hopefully it would hold the creature and if his hypothesis was true he'd have a suprise weapon for his next arena match.
Sithis then set up the protective circle around himself. making sure to keep within the parameters of the ritual. one wrong step and well... there wouldnt be much left of him. Sithis infused all the circles with his will, drawing energy from the vast reserve within him.
he bagan the chant, letting the words flow from him. the circles glowed. he kept up the chant, his voice keeping steady and even. he sent out more energy, causing the circles to blaze into power.
he soon reached the last part, and invoked it. he spoke out the entities name thrice. creating an summons that no creature could resist.

It had taken him three months to find the creatures name. three months of pouring over research tomes and manuels of true names.
within the summoning circle a figure began to form. a huge bi-pedal creature made from crackling storm clouds, it was imperitive that he made sure it didnt form in its largest form. this would make it easier for him to bind it.
lightning danced across the creatures body. as two eyes of blazing energy formed.

Azzkorath: *his voice like the crashing of thunder and the howling of a huricane* Who dares summon Azzkorath, Primal elemental of the Storm ?

Sithis didnt answer, sending his will into the circle. he sent power into the circle binding the creature there and sealing. he finished the chant. the creature looked sullen.... well as sullen as a storm cloud could. he locked his gaze with the creature

Sithis: Azzkorath, i have summoned you and bound you to my will-

Azzkorath: *cutting him off* your not summoning me to complete a task are you? barely a week goes by without some fledgling wizard, no offence, summoning me to complete a task for him. *sigh* it seems i have no choice. but can you skip all the formalities. just get down to what you want.

Sithis: Azzkorath, I have a proposal for you. you see the third circle? * it nods* i promise you shelter from any chance of you being summoned for as long as i deem neccesary if you agree to be bound into the staff.

Azzkorath: You would do that? you really would? sweet. its been an age since i've had a holiday. I agree to your terms wizard.

Sithis nodded and began the most complicated bit, the chant was difficult, as he sent waves of energy into the third circle. he felt the raw power of his magic dance within his very form, he felt his mind race with the power. he opened the channel between the first and third circle. chanting all the time.
Azzkoraths form funnled and was drawn into the third circle and the staff.
Sithis began chanting. sealing the binding.

he finished. and a wave of exuastion struck him. Sithis felt as if his limbs had become lead. he deactivated the circles and rose slowly. he walked towards the staff, and telekenticaly picked it up. his hand clasped onto the back wood and he strode from his lab into his bed room. he opened a chest, and laid the staff in it. he then covered its hideing place over with black velvet and a second layer of equipment. Sithis yawned.
he didnt have the energy to weave any protective enchantments over it now. nor even the power to use an illusion to cover it up. Sithis opened the lid of his coffin and stepped in. letting himself relax within its comfortable interior and fell into the comforting blackness of sleep.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-02-07, 09:02 AM		There is a large room made of clouds, with couches made of clouds. Gods are all different pantheons sit on the couches around a TV made of clouds (gos are not known for being original) watching the goings-on of Elina and friends. Various of them are weeping, among them Aphrodite, Isis, and Loki.

Aphrodite: :weep: A most tragic love.

Isis: :weep: Be strong, Lilly, and the one you love shall come back to you.

Loki: :weep: Poor Shadow, plans are all falling apart.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-02-07, 09:09 AM		Jarlot is redecorating his office.

Well, he's sitting around telling Igor what to do. But that counts under "being a mathter of an Igor". Deciding to soothe his aching vocal cords, he goes to his drink cabinet.

Jarlot: :OMG!

It's empty! Empty of every bottle, six-pack, keg, and other form of storing alchohol including the bladders of prehistoric animals. The only thing left is a note. Jarlot picks it up and reads.

Note: "Doodoooooooo, d-doodoo."
DungeonJman

01-02-07, 12:15 PM		Wait a minute, since we revealed the location of the deities, doesn't that mean...

*suddenly a horde of level 60 characters comes on to the cloud*

HOSLC: WOO HOO! XP!!!

Assorted Deities: CURSE YOU!!!
cypher_zero

01-02-07, 12:24 PM		Teseris

Terrek stands in his lab, inspecting himself in the mirror. The devouring of Sa’vor’s soul had brought with it many changes. Terrek's metallic flesh now shone with the Syberies Mark of Death. Iridescent scales formed on parts of his skin and his fingers, even when ungauntleted now ended in wicked claws.

He felt eldritch energy tugging at his fingers, just below the surface, aching to be released. He felt his new mindblade as well, like a knife waiting to be drawn from his own flesh. Psionic energies pounded at his temple begging for release. Snatches of battle-tactics poured through his mind as he let his new powers wash over him.

Sa’vor was a warrior, through and through. Every ounce of his soul seemed devoted to battle. It was truly a pity that he chose to die. There were few beings that could earn Terrek's respect, but Sa’vor had.

For this reason, Sa’vor’s soul did not reside in the endless depths of Terrek's, but rather held a small place in the back of his mind, asleep. He would be as a constant companion to Terrek, though Terrek was loath to wake his spirit from its slumber without provocation.

From somewhere behind Terrek a voice called his name…
.
DungeonJman

01-02-07, 12:35 PM		* somewhere else, on the forgotten freedom, Lawful DungeonJ is standing next to Chuck Jarlot*

Lawful DungeonJ: Here, i am prepared to test my hypothesis on the ways to defeat Chuck Norris, thus proving that he is not invincible. While there are an infinite amount of ways to do this, i shall start out with the simplest.

*pulls lever and suddenly: Gandalf the Grey and Gandalf the White and Monty Python and The Holy Grail's Black Knight, Benito Mussolini and The Blue Meanie, Cowboy Curtis and Jambi the Genie, Robocop, The Terminator, Captain Kirk, Darth Vader, Lo Pan, Superman and every single Power Ranger, Bill S. Preston, Theodore Logan, Spock, The Rock, Doc. Ock, and Hulk Hogan all came out of nowhere lightning fast and well, you know*

Lawful DungeonJ: *standing next to the Chuck Jarlot lying on the ground in pain* We have now disproven two things: That Chuck Norris can defeat anyone, and that he is unable to cry. Now i will test whether his tears can cure cancer by analyzing their genetic structure, and then mass producing them and selling them for the best price possible. Because money is the root of all evil, i will then give away the money to a good cause, thus balancing out the two moral extremes.

*walks away*

Good DungeonJ: Yay!

Nobby: What the heck was that?

OODungeonJ: I'm bored, what else am i going to do?
cypher_zero

01-02-07, 12:40 PM		:ayyyy!: lol Awesome DJM!
I now hereby award you the Orange Period of DOOM! (tm):
.
rampant

01-02-07, 12:44 PM		Teiza - W-

Corre - Shut up!
-----------------------------

Teiza - Razzafragging!

A shadow arrow leaps from her hand and plasters the target against the far wall.

Terra - What's wrong normally your shots go straight through the head rather than the torso.

Teiza - What's wrong with here?

Terra - Excuse me?

Teiza - Why does she want to leave so bad?

Terra - Ah hah so thats whats bugging you.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-02-07, 01:42 PM		Note: "Doodoooooooo, d-doodoo."
Curse you! CUUURRRRRSSSSEEEEEE YOUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!

13: :evillaugh
Charles Phipps

01-02-07, 01:44 PM		Awwww.

Elina just needs a hug, poor widdle Goth girl!

*picks her up and snuggles*

"GAH!"
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-02-07, 01:51 PM		Curse you! CUUURRRRRSSSSEEEEEE YOUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!

13: :evillaugh
OOcat: You'd think it'd've gotten over that by now. :confused: I mean, there are worse songs to have stuck in your head—

OOC: DON'T THINK OF THEM!

OOcat:…………………:thinks:……………That's funny, I can't think of any.

OOC: Yeah, that is funny. :confused:
**********
Somewhere deep in the recesses of OOcat…………

Snarling Mass of Annoying Tunes: *GROWL!*

OOcat-Link: *cool sword moves*

Random Commentator Thought: Maybe Kazier should get one of those.

Random Fun Thought: Dude, totally.
Phantomcrossing

01-02-07, 03:09 PM		In the middle of the night, Nobaz happily finishes restocking the galley of the Forgotten Freedom. All the spices are lined up, and the poisons are in order. The para-elemental bound ice room is full of meats and prisoners, and the pantry is full of preserves, cans, and fresh fruits and veggies. With a content smile the half giant lays a slab of beef on the cutting board and stabs it with his dagger. The meat withers and becomes jerky as it comes dehydrated by the desiccating dagger he is happy to again use. With a whistle and a flourish the dagger finds itself sheathed at his hip. Eagerly he takes a kitchen knife and begins cutting the dried beef into strips. As he does this, a tired looking figure stumbles into the kitchen and then stares in shock at the fellow making jerky before him.

Michael: Unholy ****, Norbaz?! You're back?

Norbaz: Yeah, finally got the chili recipe back. What are you doing here?

Michael: Eh, snatching a midnight snack, specifically at the start of some good religions period of fasting. When did you get back.

Norbaz: The other day, just finished getting things back together in here.

Michael: Wait, you've been doing this all night?

Norbaz: Picked up a ring of sustenance while I was out. So, how's the freedom been. How's Andrea? I heard something about Marish having a litter.
rampant

01-02-07, 04:33 PM		Corre and Teiza wander into the Galley.

Norbaz - Hello girls, shouldn't you be in bed?

Teiza - :confused:

Corre - :confused:

Norbaz - You know, sleeping?

Teiza, Corre - :lightbulb:

Teiza - We don't sleep.

Norbaz - (i.h.h. that kid is scary) Well then, What'll you have?

Corre - Chili Please :bigeyes:

Norbaz - (i.h.h. gah cute atttacK)
Kaizer_Ryu

01-02-07, 04:56 PM		Elina wandered the ship, unable to sleep. Kitsune/Shadow had honored her wish to leave her be, but in place of it was a deafening silence. She had long since learned to block out the wails of the memories that permeated the ship, so that wasn't a problem.

The recent incident with Lilly had shaken her confidence. She didn't like him, but she didn't want him dead. She had nearly done the same thing to him that most of the rest of the world wanted to do to her. Kill her for what she had not done yet, but may do in the future.

Where had all those memories come from? It was all so sudden, but it had given her some perspective. She had fallen so far in these last few years. Some of the things she had done...especially what she had hidden from her parents and friends...she wouldn't have even considered doing before the incident. She had indeed lost her innocence, but the more she looked at her life since, the more she wondered if she had lost herself as well.

???: Pardon me, my lady.

Elina: Hmm?

Snapped from her internal dialogue, she looked in the direction of the strange voice. Partially hidden in the shadows, a hooded figure stands there, watching her.

???: I apologize if I've disturbed you, but might you be Ms. Elina Branford?

Elina: ...I am. What of it?

???: The Chosen of the Shadow and destined Promise Breaker?

Elina: *takes a defensive stance* Are you some kind of bountyhunter?

???: Far from it, my Lady.

The figure steped out from the shadows and lowers its hood. Immediately, Elina's cheeks burned red. He was gorgeous. Take the best parts of the Elven and Kalashtar races, mix in a little true Outsider blood, and you might get this. But it was those eyes. Those deep blue orbs beneath that blonde hair were what she couldn't tear her gaze away from.

???: I have been searching for you for some time. I know the hate and fear you inspire among the fools of the world.

Elina: :blush: ...uh... :blush: *shakes her head* Who are you? What are you here for if not my life?

???: Oh, forgive my rudeness, my Lady.

He walked over to her, his mage robes flowing softly as he moved. Taking her hand, he knelt in front of her.

Yuan: My name is Yuan Kulanni. I bear an Abberant Mark, and I know what it is like to be hated and feared.

The look on his face was sincere. Elina felt as if her heart was in her throat as he continued.

Yuan: That is why I have sought you out. I know you only wish to give the future back to those it belongs to. I can think of no greater honor than being by your side during this time of hardship. I can only apologize I did not find you earlier.

When he kissed her hand, Elina felt almost giddy. She wondered if this is what love at first sight was like. What was it about this stranger that sent her flying? Even as he stood and offered to escort her back to her room, she could do little but accept. Her normal mistrust and reservedness seemed to vanish as they walked off...


Yuan Kulanni

Race unknown, possibly Kalashtar/Elf mix

Class(es) Unknown, possibly a spellcaster

He speaks very seldom of his past or profession, and seems unnatually adept at deflecting these questions. His skills and power are unknown at this time, and he dislikes confrontation. Elina seems completely smitten with him, and is often more than adquate to keep others from pestering him enough to get anything useful out of him. He is always polite and cordial, adressing Elina almost constantly as 'My Lady'. To everyone else, he is likewise polite, and it takes quite a lot to get him riled up. Sarcastic, angry, or haughty speech is almost unheard of from him.

Tirmek and Sarah are intensely mistrustful of him for different reasons. Timrek finds him simply too perfect for Elina and just plain creepy. Sarah can't quite identify it, but something about his smell is just wrong. Scias dislikes him to the point that he has actually bit him. Like Sarah, he thinks he "s-s-s-s..........smells funny".

Terra and Lisa are very uncertain about Elina's new boyfriend, and are watching the two of them closely. Needless to say, Lilly is heartbroken. Miko still wants him to pay attention to her, but he won't even look at her now that he knows she was seducing him.

OOC: And a whole new level of 'what the hell?' is thrown into the mix. :evillaugh
rampant

01-02-07, 05:24 PM		Mittens - *slice*

OOUrial - OUCH!

Mittens - Mew (move it)
---------------------------------------

Kerrith - Where did the cat go?

Mittens - Mew (wherever i please)

Kerrith - Of course:rolleyes:
...

...

Ok I've been stuck here with these guys too long.
DungeonJman

01-02-07, 05:53 PM		Lawful DungeonJ: I have heard what has happened through a link to the main personality and have come up with two theories already. More are being deduced as we speak, and all have a grain of logic to them.

Nobby: For the love of... no wonder he's so annoying when he comes to these things, his lawful side works like a stinking processor box!

OODungeonJ: Processor box?

Nobby: Device made by magic that allows people to figure out complex equations and probabilities and other stuff and put it into word form.

OODungeonJ: Isn't that just a really high tech calculator with alterations made so that it shows the results as words instead of numbers?

Nobby: Lies! What is this calculator of which you speak?
Crystalforged

01-02-07, 06:17 PM		The bar, shortly after news of Elina's new boyfriend reaches it.

Patron 1: Twenty Gold on murderous, evil, psychopath!

Patron 2: Make that fifty!

Patron 3: I'll put ten on him being from an alternate universe!

Patron 4: Thirty says Elina ends up killing him!

Patron 5: Yeah right, a hundred says its Terra that does it!

Patron 6: (quietly) I'll put five on him turning out to be a decent demi-humanbeing.

The entire bar stops to stare at him.

Patron 1: Now THERE'S a fools bet. (turns back to the bar) I'll put another fifteen that he's a puppet of the shadow.

Erk sighs and reaches below the counter to pull out a chalkboard and quickly writes out some odds on it before hanging it over the bar and starting to take money for bets.
ratslinky

01-02-07, 06:28 PM		OORatslinky: This scene happens when Elina first see's Yuan.

*As Yuan and Elina leave a dark figure steps out of the shadows*

Esabar: Interesting he seems on the surface to be a decent person.

Gaz: Decent on this ship :confused:

Esabar: Yes decent I think thats unlikely on this ship thoe. I'll need your help to find out more

Gaz: Okay just promise me one thing you'll let me break the news to Lilly :evillaugh

Esabar: Thats cruel but ok

Gaz: Well lets get back to finishing the preperation for my party.

Esabar: Yes lets just remember it might be a good time to find out more about Yuan

Gaz: Yes it might I just hope Lilly doesn't pick a fight with him

Esabar: Yeah me to
urial angel of death

01-02-07, 06:54 PM		OOUrial: Being deprived of internet access for several days has caused me to forget the planeshopping story I had cooked up. So it may be finished via flashback it may not. If the other entities would like to finish on their own be my guest.

Kerrith (four years later)
Kerrith has only aged a little physically, because he is a full-blood drow.

Butters
Has finally convinced the rest of his family that he is in fact related.

Kerrith: *apon seeing Yuan* Urge to kill rising.
rampant

01-02-07, 07:25 PM		Dorvos - Hmmmm

Corre and Teiza - Yay Brother is home!

Satnak - You look like the cat that got the cream.

Mittens - Mew (hell mice are tasty) :D

Serene - Oh Dorvos its so good to have you home.

Teiza - Now Tell Corre she can't leave!

Dorvos - :confused:
Kaizer_Ryu

01-02-07, 08:22 PM		Nina: Stop it, you guys!

Deis: :confused: Why?

Yuan: *bound and gagged* *anime sweatdrop* (i.h.h.: Since when can this one cast Evards Black Tentacles?)

Nina: :( Elina ne-chan really likes him and you're being mean...

Scias: *chew* Grrrrrr... *bite*

Momo: We need to find out more about him!

Deis: How's the new invention working?

Momo: Either this scanner is crap, he's not giving off any readings, or something's jamming it.

Nina: :( Can't we just ask him?

Deis: He won't say anything and you know it.

Yuan: (i.h.h.: My Lady has scary siblings... :eek: :blush: Watch where you put that tentacle!)

Nina: You enjoy this spell far too much, ne-chan.

Deis: Not surprising, considering how we were brought into this world. :devil: (OOC: Volrath had the talk with them already :rolleyes: )

Nina: :blush: :blush: :blush:

Scias: E-e-e-e-e....................ew.

Momo: Can't you just steal his true identity?

Scias: N-n-n-n-n.........not unl-l-l-less it's f-f-f-f-f-f.....................................*a nime sweatdrop* ...........funny.

Elina: What are you four doing?!

Deis: :eek: Run away!

The four hightail it out of there as Scias steals an escape route. Elina dispels the tentacles and lifts Yuan up.

Elina: I'm sorry about that.

Yuan: Think nothing of it, my Lady. They are merely worried about your safety.

Elina: They don't have to go that far... And please, call me Elina.

Yuan: That would be improper, my Lady. Someone of your beauty and stature must have the proper respect shown to them.

Elina: :cloud9: *giggle* *sigh* I'd still like you to call me by name.

Yuan: ...perhaps...once I have gotten to know my Lady better, I will feel at ease to oblige that request. Will that satisfy my Lady's desires?

Elina: :smirk: Would you like to work on that now?

She leans in to kiss him for the first time, but he puts his finger to her lips and stops her.

Yuan: I apologise for denying my Lady's request, but a gentleman cannot allow a fine young woman such as youself to be so forward so soon. I must be certain that my Lady is not merely indulging a passing fancy.

Elina: *pouts* You don't trust my judgement?

Yuan: I merely wish to ensure that my Lady not mistake her impulses for her true desire. I am flattered that you would request something like that from me, but I have a duty to protect my Lady. I'm sorry...

He was a perfect gentleman indeed. He put up with her young sibling's antics, Sarah, Tirmek, and Sithis's constant snooping, Gaz/Esabar's quierys and mindgames, and her parent's mistrust without a hint of resentment. After getting over the initial shock of someone so perfect merely walking into her life, she had wondered if he was truly dedicated to her best interests. Enduring the constant abuse and denying her affections clinched it. She would have him if it took the rest of her nigh-immortal life to get him.
urial angel of death

01-02-07, 08:31 PM		Kerrith: Why didn't talking like that get me anywhere?

Lilly: Your first impresion really stuck.

OOUrial: Also your entity is too lazy and lacking in etiquete, ettiquety, etti... manners.

Kerrith: I hate you guys.
rampant

01-02-07, 08:41 PM		Tirmek - Your very good at this.

Yuan - Thank you.

Tirmek - Understand, i still don't trust you.

Yuan - Why not precisely?

Tirmek - Because you have moved so quickly into her good graces, because i know so little of you. I would be remiss in my duties as her friends if I did not keep an eye on you.

Yuan - Understood, (moves a game piece) Check I believe.

Tirmek - (takes the piece with one of his own) Check mate.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-02-07, 10:22 PM		Silver: :mad: I don't like him.

13: Because………?

Silver: He refused to kiss her. He tells her to wait. I'm all about the "do it fast".

13: And do it long. :rolleyes: But it's almost a done deal. She's in the bag, you just need to corrupt him.

Silver: But then she won't like him anymore. I mean, him corrupted is Lilly. I'd rather the dog I have trained rather than the one I don't know will bite my leg.

13: For my part, he's too easy to torment sometimes, not enough the others.

13 and Silver look at Bunny.

Bunny: He's not killing anyone. :whatsthis
rampant

01-02-07, 11:21 PM		Tirmek is still analyzing the game board looking quite pleased with himself.

Sarah walks in.

Sarah - Well?

Tirmek - Yuan is hiding something important, atleast to him.

Sarah - And you know this how?

Tirmek - He plays like a secret keeper, he plays like Terrek, tries to hide his true plan. Unlike Terrek he's not good enough to do that without loosing control of the board. That little devil Teiza would rip him apart in 6 moves.

Sarah - It took you 14.

Tirmek - I was leading him on.

Sarah - That's not like you.

Tirmek - I know, but I had to make sure he wasn't losing on purpose, the best way to do that is to draw the game out without leaving any obvious errors, and see if he lets any hints of his true skill throug by mistake.

Sarah - He could still be playing you.

Tirmek - True, and I will keep that in mind.

Sarah - Well then come along, Its shopping time. I saw the cutest dress I want to see you in.

Tirmek - :embarrass
ratslinky

01-02-07, 11:38 PM		Gaz/Esabar's quierys and mindgames.

OORatslinky: Kaizer not meaning to be disrespectful but if Gaz/Esabar wanted to find things out about him he would never know.

IC:

Gaz: *see's Sarah and Tirmek heading off to the shops* hey guys when you get back I have a present for you. And Tirmek what did he do in the chess game?

Tirmek: How did you know about that :confused:

Gaz: Esabar is a bit of a knowledge freak right now she's bugged every single room in the upper deck so she can skry even when the room is protected vs skrying

Tirmek: You knew i was playing a chess game how come you don't know

Gaz: She had other things to do she was just flipping thru the rooms when you challenged Yuan to a chess game

Sarah: are you skrying on mom and momma

Gaz: Well their room is bugged but Esabar trys to avoid it most of the time it to freaky

OORatslinky: Over to you rampant
rampant

01-02-07, 11:57 PM		Tirmek - He kept trying to bait me into targeting away from his main formation, but he would chicken out before he could close the trap, panic and try to cut his losses. When he did I would harry the other side. ... Any useful data on the Teiza situation?

Gaz - No creepy little kid keeps eating my bugs, to top it off its just scary when she looks into them. To make matters worse there's about a thousand layers of jammer, scrambler, and ley loops over your Aunts' entire suite, then Everyone has their own personalized defenses. UHg!
Kaizer_Ryu

01-03-07, 12:12 AM		OORatslinky: Kaizer not meaning to be disrespectful but if Gaz/Esabar wanted to find things out about him he would never know.OOC: If that's what you want to believe. :devil: :evillaugh

IC:

Terra: That's the third time in a month. *shorts out Esabar's bug*

Lisa: She's persistent, I'll give her that. But what about our other problem?

Terra: *sigh* I have no idea. I've scrounged up everything I could, and I can't find jack about this Yuan Kulanni or anyone matching his description more than a month before he arrived.

Lisa: An assumed identity? Possibly a Changeling, Doppleganger, or Incubus?

Terra: Oh, believe me, Incubus was the first thing I checked on. And as far as I can tell, he's none of those. The damndest thing is...he doesn't seem to be anything. You've felt it. We're both trained enough to guage a person's abilities by sight and movement, as well as by their aura. I get nothing. Not even a life force signature.

Lisa: Elina seems to have fallen head over heels in love with him. I know that look all too well. I've seen it on you many times. ;)

Terra: :embarrass What can I say? We've known each other nigh on twenty years, and you still take my breath away.

Lisa: :D

Terra: Tirmek's trying a more subtle approach. He can't seem to read his mind, so he's been trying to draw out personality traits. He's confirmed he's secretive, but that much was obvious. It's what he's hiding and why that has me worried.

Lisa: According to Gaz/Esabar, he's done nothing out of the ordinary. It's almost as if he's going out of his way to remain above suspicion.

Terra: Which of course makes me even more suspicious.

Lisa: But we really can't do anything till we have proof he's up to something. Elina would never forgive us for breaking them up on a hunch. Even if it is Mother's Instinct.

Terra: And right now it's telling me to get this young man away from our daughter yesterday.

Lisa: There's always the possibility he really is as well intentioned as he seems. That what he's hiding is a past he's left behind. Perhaps he merely doesn't want to burden her with futher pain, even if it's just his own.

Terra: Which is why I'm ignoring the red flags. I'm not sure if these worries are in defense of our daughter or a reaction to Yuan.

Lisa: So we just watch and wait?

Terra: It's all we can do.
rampant

01-03-07, 12:38 AM		Reser (Male Half-elf, blonde, green eyes, wears modified sailor's garb in his house color of sky blue) d'Gelleon - Hey guys! Check It I got an airskiff! Lets go buzz some dinos!

Sarah - Please Like we can't do that on our own!

Reser - Its got a cannon.

Sarah - I'm listening

Elina - Oh come on Sarah!

Reser - With a full automatic mode and swivel turret.

Elina - Hehehehehehehe :evillaugh:

Tirmek - I'll be going then.

Reser - Oh I'm sorry I thought you were someone else for a bit...never realized how girly Tirmek looked.

Sarah - Excu-

Tirmek - (pathing) Not yet Sarah, lets mess with his head :plotting: Elina stop Yuan before he blows the trick!

Yuan - I- Huh?

Elina - (whispers) Not yet! Tirmek's got a plan.

Reser - Of course your friend can come too, Elina. I can't let a pretty girl get left behind.

Yuan - (i.h.h. Ok at first I wanted to be nice, but now he suffers for this) (Whispers back to Elina) I'm in
ratslinky

01-03-07, 01:00 AM		*Gaz walks up to Terra and Lisa's room and knock politely. After a few seconds the door opens and Terra and Lisa are there*

Gaz: Hello Terra hello Lisa i Am aware you are suspicious of Yuan well i have an idea as you know my birthday pary is in a few days.

Terra: Yes so?

Gaz: Well seeing as ive invited the whole ship to my party their is going to be a lot of booze flowing that may loosen his tongue.

Lisa: Yes but if he keeps up with this high and mighty stuff he probebly will not drink alchahol

Gaz: I suspect thats the case and i have a plan if he refuses alchahol i'll give him water with rubbing alchahol it has 80% alchahol that should get him drunk enough to get him to loosen his tongue. If he is immune to poisons then I might need your help Terra i can spike drinks easliy enough but if you have a substance that doesn't register as a poison that would be helpful.

OORatslinky: It's up to you to answer Kaizer
Paulon

01-03-07, 01:11 AM		OOC to Ratslinky: I suspect anyone who's tried bugging the Ubers is getting whatever results the Ubers want them to get if they have survived the attempt. They're god and godkiller class powers by now, many of whom explicitly guard their privacy. Though anyone who's trying to monitor Kanatash and Caralot and what they do together deserves what they get out of it, which is generally a free trip to the loony bin.

#####################

IC:

Hunger. Strangeness. Danger. But mostly hunger.

The smell of cooking? Somewhere to find food? Perhaps...

Norbaz is working on another batch of chilli, trying to get ahead of the demand from Satnak and her family when a plaintive 'Meow' reaches his ears.

Sitting in the doorway with a :bigeyes: expression is a cat, fairly large but skinny, as if it hasn't eaten in some time. It meows again, a sound filled with longing for a meal.

Norbaz stares at the cat for a moment. For a moment it seems almost to blur in his vision, as if under the feline form something else is lurking. He blinks, and the impression is gone. Shrugging, Norbaz walks to the cool room to find some fish for the poor creature.

Behind his back, the momentarily forgotten pot of chilli bubbles over, some slopping over the side and oozing onto the floor, forming a pile nearly the size of the watching cat. A cautious sniff from the cat is responded to with a bubbling lunge that dissolves a whisker before the feline can jump clear.

Edging cautiously into the corridor, the cat is followed out of the galley by the oozing chilli...

There is a sound of thunder, bringing Norbaz running, holding most of a large trout he had been cutting up. He spots the overboiled chilli trail and looks cautiously out the door.

The corridor is liberally splattered with chunks of chilli, still lit with traceries of blue sparks. The cat, its coat also cracking with blue sparks of static, is standing near the edge of the mess, tasting a portion. It turns up its nose at it and looks at Norbaz, eyeing the fish. "Meow?" :bigeyes:

Norbaz looks at the cat and carefully puts the fish down on the floor. Purring, the cat walks over and starts eating. In an amazingly short time the trout is gone, aside from some skin and a few bones.

The cat looks at Norbaz, who remains in the doorway where he can watch both the chilli and the feline, and says "Meow" with a clear 'Thank you' in the tone. It then trots off down the corridor.

Picking up the skin and bones, Norbaz finds two gold coins underneath them. Marked on one side with a crown and writing in an unknown script and the other with what seems to be an arcane symbol, they look like nothing currently in use on Khovaire.

#####################

OOC:
Fela, female 'not exactly a cat', AL CG, tending towards CN when provoked.
Her coat is mid-brown, with darker spots, becoming almost golden in bright light. There's a cord looped around her neck with a black stone knotted into it like a pendant.
OOCly speaking she's a refugee from an entirely different character design system, so she isn't easy for me to convert for me to D&D. She's got a combination of minor telepathic and sorcery skills, with a lesser degree of stealth and combat (cat vs commoner anyone?).
To most people Fela looks like a large cat. Most people on the FF above the redshirts can see through that if they look closely - her true shape is the same size and coat pattern, but she's clearly a kitten of a larger species. She can use the illusion appearance trick for other purposes too.
She's naturally telepathic, but got lost as a kitten and never trained, so she hasn't worked out how to 'talk' to a non-telepath. Anyone with psionic or mindreading ability or who can talk to animals would be able to talk to her - if she feels like saying anything.
Her stone 'pendant' has magical properties.
rampant

01-03-07, 01:16 AM		OOC: Anyone else notice the abundance of cats on board? I feel sorry for the rats.
ratslinky

01-03-07, 01:24 AM		OORatslinky: Yes i'm quite aware that bugging the Ubers is impossible without retribution or that used to be the case. Seeing as most of them are married or have children they have quitened down a bit to the point where Esabar is simply forced to do meaniel labor this has gotten Gaz quite annoyed as they share the same body and so he has asked her to put a stop to it. As for Caralot and Kanatash well she avoided putting bugs on it.
Charles Phipps

01-03-07, 02:11 AM		Rose: You know, I'm going to give my son some romantic advice.

Zella: You mean that Ivy needs to throttle Sarah and then present himself to Tirmek as a consoling voice?

Rose: NO!

Zella: The Girlde of Masculinity Feminity?

Rose: NO!

Zella: A philater of love?

Rose: Zella, it's not about Ivy.

Zella: Obviously, Ivy's best course of action is to convince Tirmek that a three way marriage would suit him best.

Rose: ....Tirmek's not necessarily gay just a shapechanger.

Zella: Right, he's Tigersexual

Rose: No my advice is for Lilly.

Zella: Get a less high maintainance girlfriend?

Rose: Err...pot, kettle, black?

Zella: I don't see what BLACK elves have to do with it.

Rose: Oh here we go again!

Zella: You know ever since we let that Drow onboard, the silverware has been disappearing.

Rose: That's because it's a pirate ship and people are stealing it.

Zella: He's been drinking from the same water fountain as us, doesn't that disturb you!?

Rose: Forgotten Realm prejudice doesn't exist on Eberron.

*she points to Drizzt Do'Urden*

Zella: I've got my EYE ON YOU!

Drizzt: *broods angstfully*

Zella: You know, he's lowering our property value just by standing there.

Rose: Zella, I understand you come from a very conservative Southern family on Aerenal but we've moved passed these sort of ideas.

Michael: WORK YOU FILTHY ORC SLAVES!

*Michael cracks the whips on the roarers of the Forgotten Freedom despite there not needing to be rowers on an airship*

Drizzt: *somberly poses*

Zella: Just don't let him carry me off in his wild Drowish lust.

Rose: Ugh.

Zella: You know Lilly has been listening to that awful Drowish music.

Rose: *sigh*

Lilly: I'm actually thinking about just giving up. I love her but if she doesn't want me I have too much self respect to continue to chase her like some love sick puppy.

Zella: YOU TAKE THAT BACK! KNIGHTS EXIST TO SERVE PRINCESSES!

Lilly: Well I was thinking of dating another girl.

*Points to a Drowish girl over by Drizzt*

Zella: *faints*
Kaizer_Ryu

01-03-07, 02:12 AM		OORatslinky: It's up to you to answer KaizerOOC: Just so there's no confusion by anyone, Yuan's not really doing any kind of 'high and mighty' act. As far as anyone can tell (and it may actually be the case :devil: ), his only goal is Elina's safety and well being. He keeps to himself, but is not unfriendly. The way he talks isn't intended to come off as haughty, he's just very well mannered. The mode of speech I'm going for is European Aristocrat minus the accent. If I had to pick one word to describe his attitude and demeanor: Chivalrous.

IC:

Terra: While we appreciate the offer, Gaz...

Lisa: We have to keep Elina in mind here. She's smart enough to recognize someone being drugged, especially if she hangs around him the whole time like we expect.

Terra: She knows we don't trust him.

Gaz: You're concerned that, even if something would work on him, it would backfire with Elina.

Lisa: Exactly. She's got us very worried right now. Honestly, I didn't know what to think when we heard what she did to Lilly. She was sobbing in a corner when we found her.

Terra: Right now, we need to tread lightly. What Elina said to Lilly and Miko went a long way in explaining her behavior these last few years. It was actually a relief seeing her cry. She hasn't hugged me like that in three years...

Gaz: And if we try to force information out of Yuan, she may head back into her shell.

Terra: Indeed. She is willing to tolerate what has happened so far only because he was never under compulsion to answer. If he drinks and it effects him, fine. But under no circumstances are you or anyone else to drug him.
rampant

01-03-07, 02:26 AM		Reser - So I didn't think there were all that many Nazarune who would wander around in sunlight.

Tirmek - You're not very bright are you? You See the big disadvantage of a swivel gun is it has to have some extra-mechanism to keep it from shooting your own craft. Now several of these mechanisms have loopholes. In this case you can still shoot a target standing on the deck as long as it isn't pointed at the boat itself.

Yuan (from the gun seat) - Basically what Tirmek is insinuating, is I could accidently blow the head off anyone taller than the railing.

Reser - Tirmek, you're a girl

Tirmek - Shapeshifter

Reser - :OMG! :mymy: :twitch:

Sarah - That's the same look Lily had.

Elina - Sweet! Someone get an image crystal!

Yuan - By the way I'm a guy.

Reser - *starts convulsing*
rampant

01-03-07, 03:52 AM		Satnak - I just don't know what to do with her.

Serene - I know how she feels though, I don't like the idea of Corre not being around.

Satnak - Neither do I, but if she's anything near the girl i know and love, we can't really stop her at this point.

Serene - Yes she does take after her mother.

Satnak - hahaha
ratslinky

01-03-07, 05:57 AM		OORatslinky: Kaizer I think you are right I didn't get my point across properly what I ment was he seems to be the kind to abstain from all vices I just couldn't think of another way to express it at the time of writing. And on the point of Yuan being a good person :OMG! :twitch: :twitch: :twitch: *faints*. *After a couple of hours he wakes up*. Ok now I can write a post.

IC:

Gaz: Okay I won't drug him to get infomation. But I might drug him for fun :devil:

Terra: Don't pick on him just cause you don't like him *look of indignation*

Gaz: Oh no i won't pick on him i'll drug others as well

Terra: *sigh* You fit right in :nonono:
DungeonJman

01-03-07, 08:38 AM		*walks into Erk's Place*

From the events that have taken place, i'd put a bunch of money on him either being created by Elina's subconscious as a sort of astral construct turned living, by way of latent powers, or that he's the new chosen of the Keeper, because Ivy isn't doing his job...

*runs out before falling on the floor in pain*

(i.h.h.)

???: And why are you not doing your job?

DungeonJ: So this is what it feels like when Elina talks to the Shadow

???: Shut up, you seriously have a job to do, and you know it.

DungeonJ: Look, i'm no more your pawn then the rest of them are.

???: Yes, but if you don't accept it, then someone else will do it, someone who will have a lot less mercy.

DungeonJ: Ok, i'll work on it, but i'd rather help Lilly than harm Elina, although you probably don't care.

???: Look, the job is balance, doesn't matter how it's done.

DungeonJ: Fine, fine. You know, Khyber was right, you can sometimes be a real pain, Eberron.

Eberron: Look, that was essentially the same problem, i had just as little of a choice as you!

DungeonJ: Of course, if i remember correctly, Khyber tried to unbalance the prophecy, while Siberys tried to keep it, each for their own reasons, and when Khyber grew powerful enough to unbalance the thing, you interfered, thus balancing the equation. But would you have done the same thing if you had a choice?

Eberron: Yes.

DungeonJ: Why?

Eberron: Because i've seen what you humans do on other worlds: you corrupt them with pollution, and introduce even worse weapons that devastatingly alter the environment than here. At least with the prophecy set up, the dragons can make sure that you don't ruin nature.

(OOC: May not actually do anything, but this is what is being yelled that i should do.)
Charles Phipps

01-03-07, 09:20 AM		Yuan: *sings* Perfect Perfect, I'm a Perfect bishounen and trying to be nonthreatening to a fourteen year old girl.

*walks on the deck before an anvil drops nearly behind him*

Ivy: DAMNIT!

Yuan: Hmmm?

Ivy: Oh excuse me, I'm trying to kill you off.

Yuan: Whatever for?

Ivy: Well my experiences being the Chosen of the Keeper have left me as a Neutral Evil Bard, which my brother doesn't suspect. However, my love for my family has not changed and its manifested by a desire for his happiness.

Yuan: Oh, you don't say?

Ivy: Yes, thus I'm going to have to arrange for your death in some horrific way.

Yuan: I'd rather you not do that.

Ivy: Well its part of an elaborate master plan that will eventually make Sarah end up with a tentacle monster to her delight and thus leave Tirmek to me for our shounen-ai magical girl like adventures.

Yuan: *steps away slowly*

*A girl who looks exactly like Elina except for her obsidian skin, pointy elf ears, white hair, and slightly more angular features walks on*

Aline: Pardon me, has anyone seen my boyfriend Lilly?

Ivy: The hell?

Aline: We met one another during one of the recent ports of call and fell hopelessly in love. Now I'm his resident Cleric and spiritual guide.

Ivy: Errr....what god do you worship?

Aline: I worship Lolth since I'm a holdover from the City of the Spider Queen Boxed set that Chuck transported into eberron for a campaign in Xen'drick.

Ivy: Uh...huh.

Lilly: HEY ALINE!

Aline: You made me wait again! You stupid male!

*cracks her snake whip at him*

Lilly: :love:
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-03-07, 09:32 AM		Zella: Just don't let him carry me off in his wild Drowish lust.
Silver: Time for a collaboration.

13: I love those. :devil:

OOC: Unfortunately Charles beat me to the joke for the next part.
Lilly: Well I was thinking of dating another girl.

*Points to a Drowish girl over by Drizzt*

Zella: *faints*
Drow girl (about the size of a halfling): Greetings. My name is Aline Do'um. I have come on behalf of the alliance of Ti'nee elves in hopes of recruiting allies in our war against the Toll'keen.

Nalfein: Aline Do'um? What, do you elves name each other after smokin' your hippy weed?

Lilly: (pulls the lace out of his sleeves and puts on some glasses) Yeah, baby!

FX demon: *Austin Powers theme*
Phantomcrossing

01-03-07, 10:20 AM		Norbaz: Sigh, for some reason there is entirely too much cute on this ship...and I haven't seen NJ26 yet...or Ketler for that matter. Where is that artificer?
Charles Phipps

01-03-07, 10:23 AM		Elina: La La La la....Oh it's you.

Lilly: I want you to know Elina. I've discovered how horribly wrong I was about everything I believed. I was a pawn from the Sovereign Host from the very beginning and have renounced them to embrace your role as the Promise Keeper. Thanks to your efforts, the hold of the Dragon Prophecy has been broken. You saved me.

*cries*

Elina: :blink blink: Errr thank you.

Lilly: Oh, if only Ivy could forgive me.

Elina: I'm sure he could.

*pat pat*

Lilly: Thank you.

*Elina walks off*

*Lilly puts back on his goatee*

Thorn: BAHAHAHAHAHAH! THE FOOL!

Miko: I'm not sure this is a good idea.

Thorn: You've joined the Linear Guild to be my girlfriend so we can have revenge on Elina and Lilly didn't you?

Miko: Yeah, I guess.

Thorn: Then darn well live up to it!

The Doog formerly known as Doog Junior: Doog like pretty fiend lady and want to help her

Thorn: Excellent. Now to screw with Sarah.

***

Sarah: Whew, after four years I've accumulated enough wealth from my various acts of heroism to finally pay off all of Eberron with gifts and good will so that no one thinks Elina is evil. It's enough to undo all the damage the Forgotten Freedom has done and make us into heroes in their eyes.

*Sarah goes out to get something to eat and returns to find it gone*

Sarah: :stares:

Thorn: *from off to the side* Hehehehehhehe.

Sarah: :stares:

Thorn: *from off to the side* Bwhahahahahaha.

Sarah: Dlog ym lla ot deneppah tahw?

Miko: *stares* Hmm?

Sarah: Won Yelah ekil hsirebbig kaeps I! on ho!
rampant

01-03-07, 11:21 AM		Thorn - (gets tapped on the shoulder) huh? Oh no

Tirmek - One thing about the evil opposite schtick. It only works you can find an opposite that can keep me busy.

Wham smack clang rip bite kick punch headlock smash claw firebolt
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Sarah - minglorp? (looks down to see three heads sticking up through the floor.
-------------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - For once I'm not the one who got put through the ceiling.

Three bodies dangle from the ceiling trying to escape.
urial angel of death

01-03-07, 11:49 AM		Kerrith: So it's a deal.

Ivy: I help you kill Yuan and you help me get the right tentacle monster for Sarah.

both: Muhahahahahahaha-*cough**gag**clearing throat*
DungeonJman

01-03-07, 12:32 PM		*inside of the room where the evil DungeonJ has kept Kanatash*

Evil DungeonJ: Meh, i'm bored

*walks out of the room before locking the door and when he turns around*

DungeonJ: *glares and begins forming hand signs*

Evil DungeonJ: *gulp*

DungeonJ: Dead Demon Consuming Seal (i won't die from performing this, because the seal in question is a part of me, so instead of being locked in a permanent struggle, it just rejoins)

Evil DungeonJ: AAAAAH

DungeonJ: Well, that's one down, two to go.
rampant

01-03-07, 02:57 PM		Tirmek (female, wearing a green shirt and tank top) - You know my mother won't let me keep this kind of stuff in the house.

Sarah - I know, thats why i keep all of thes clothes. Now turn around.

Tirmek - :embarrass *turns*

Sarah - (i.h.h. she's so cute,...he's so cute,...to heck with it :drool: )

-----------------------------------------------------------

Store clerk - Oh, hello Sarah, who's this? your girlfriend ;)

Sarah - um..:embarrass , well kinda

Store clerk - hahaha Good to see you're not with that Tharmis kid.

Tirmek - :twitch:

Sarah - What's wrong with Tirmek, He's a loyal friend and a decent person.

Store clerk - Yeah, but those Rakshasa... They have this thing for harems.

Tirmek - *cough*only*coughCough*females*cough*do that*coughcough*

Store clerk - Oh you poor thing aisle 4 for the throat drops.
rampant

01-03-07, 03:10 PM		Lily - Oh there's something I've been meaning to do.
------------------------------------

Later

Lily - I had +8 on the fink! How did I get up here!?

Kerrith - Sarah snuck up on you from behind.

Lily - Whats your story?

Thorn - He got wailed on by Teiza for trying to take advantage of your distraction to gut Tirmek.

Izzy - What I want to know Is what I did to deserve being stuck up here with you lot.

Doog jr. - Doog want a puppy:( .

Miko - Geeze How many more peoples' heads are they gonna stuff in here berfore the floor collapses?
Charles Phipps

01-03-07, 03:13 PM		Surreeee Tirmek, SUREEE only the females do it.

RIGhttttt
rampant

01-03-07, 03:21 PM		Tirmek - I'm serious, in my world at least female rakshasa are typically 1+1/2 times the size of a male, and tend to be the leaders. In fact the Naityan refuse to follow any male not of the blood of Kri'ie'es Neir the primordial Matriarch of my father's tribe. In fact I never get to touch the gold in my father's legal holdings until such time as my eventual wife decides to claim it.

Sarah - :$$:
Charles Phipps

01-03-07, 03:40 PM		Ivy: Hmmm....

Tirmek: I'm sorry Ivy, I've known about your feelings for a long time but I just don't feel that way about males.

Ivy: I understand.

Tirmek: Thanks. I guess I'm a lesbian in my female form.

*Ivy walks off*

Tirmek: Well that went better.

Ivy: Polymorph Self!

Tirmek: :twitch:

Ivy: *A redheaded half-elven lass pops up by Tirmek* Let's talk about that gold!
rampant

01-03-07, 04:12 PM		Tirmek - SARAH! HELP!
--------------------------------------

Teiza - grrrrr

Corre - get over it, its not like I'm leaving forever

Headmistress - Corre B. Tessier, its your turn.

Corre - See ya sis
heads up to enter the chambers

Teiza - Wait... good luck.

Corre - Thanks
hheads in
Crystalforged

01-03-07, 04:31 PM		Shortly after DungeonJman leaves the room where Kanatash is being held OOCrystalforged arrives. Still in wolf form. Still being ridden by Minda.

OOCrystalforged: (pushing door open) Yo, Kanatash, you here?

Kanatash: (Still bound in chair) About time you got here. (glances at Minda) You must be the new voice in Crystalforged's head.

OOCrystalforged: Yeah, say could you get these bonds off him, I sort of lack opposable thumbs right now.

Minda: (patting OOCrystalforged on the head) Since you've been such a nice puppy, alright. (slices Kanatash's bonds with dark magic)

OOCrystalforged: Say, Kanatash, I thought I overheard something about DungeonJman's evil side trying to torture you. How'd that turn out?

Kanatash: About how you would expect.

OOCrystalforged: Oh yeah, what did he use?

Kanatash: Weeeeeell... Lets see, he used thumbscrews, pears of agony, jawbreakers, iron maidens, flaying knives, salt water, salt, lemon juice, racks, whips barbed with glass, tentacle rods, pliers, fireplace pokers, various hallucinogenic drugs, fluid injectors, flow stone, spoons, water clocks, lion tongues, medical saws, porcelain plates, forks, chalkboards, Tabasco Sauce, the first D&D movie, the programmed and major image spells, his books, lubricant, duct tape, stakes, and chains. There might have been a few others there somewhere I forgot.

OOCrystalforged: So in otherwords all the stuff Caralot uses when you two aren't feeling particularly kinky.

Kanatash: Yeah, pretty much.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-03-07, 05:56 PM		Kanatash: … he used thumbscrews, pears of agony, jawbreakers, iron maidens, flaying knives, salt water, salt, lemon juice, racks, whips barbed with glass, tentacle rods, pliers, fireplace pokers, various hallucinogenic drugs, fluid injectors, flow stone, spoons, water clocks, lion tongues, medical saws, porcelain plates, forks, chalkboards, Tabasco Sauce, the first D&D movie, the programmed and major image spells, his books, lubricant, duct tape, stakes, and chains. There might have been a few others there somewhere I forgot.
OOC: Someone knows way too much about torture.

Bunny: Seriously. :mad: It's such a waste.
OOCrystalforged: So in otherwords all the stuff Caralot uses when you two aren't feeling particularly kinky.
Silver: You know it. :devil:

Bunny: And people find me scary. :bored:
DungeonJman

01-03-07, 06:16 PM		Oh, he must not have gotten to the real torture then, because he kept telling me that he was going to drive you sane, make your sane self apologize to crystal about what he had done, while simultaneously showing the evil of the powers that you had, turn that into a hippie, then drive that insane, tell Caralot what your sane self had done, before releasing a bunch of kittens and Marish into the room, before driving you completely sane.

OOCharles: I though that you were busy with the other sides of your personality.

DungeonJ: the good side willingly gave up and the lawful side deduced that it would be a waste of energy to struggle.
urial angel of death

01-03-07, 06:19 PM		Kanatash: Weeeeeell... Lets see, he used thumbscrews, pears of agony, jawbreakers, iron maidens, flaying knives, salt water, salt, lemon juice, racks, whips barbed with glass, tentacle rods, pliers, fireplace pokers, various hallucinogenic drugs, fluid injectors, flow stone, spoons, water clocks, lion tongues, medical saws, porcelain plates, forks, chalkboards, Tabasco Sauce, the first D&D movie, the programmed and major image spells, his books, lubricant, duct tape, stakes, and chains. There might have been a few others there somewhere I forgot.


Volrath: So that's where my stuff went!

OOC: To those in the dark Crystalforged copied almost word for word the items I listed in Volrath's introduction. Thank you Crystalforged! The prepaid groupies are being sent your way as we speak. ;)

---------

Myrr and Lenneth crouch behind a pile of debris in a mock fortress.

Lenneth: *looking out window* That Yuan guy looks so dreamy. :love:

Myrr: Sister you know what daddy said about humans.

Lenneth: Dad's a racist and a tyrant!

Myrr: You aren't supposed to be rebelious at six years old.

Lenneth: I'll be rebelious whenever I want to!

Myrr: Besides Yuan is Elina's boyfriend.

Lenneth: I'll soon remedy that.

The siblings become accutely aware that they aren't alone.

Vladamire: If I had been a real BBEG you guys would have been dead three minutes ago. Cut down on the chatter during training.
urial angel of death

01-03-07, 06:21 PM		OOC: Also just a comment I don't think that even Kanatash and Caralot would use pears of agony for kinky stuff.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-03-07, 06:25 PM		OOEled: No Alowyn's Neclace? no Plantation? Kids today. *shakehead*
cypher_zero

01-03-07, 06:49 PM		OOC: Also just a comment I don't think that even Kanatash and Caralot would use pears of agony for kinky stuff.
Why not? Terrek would. I think you're forgetting a bit about masochism.
.
Crystalforged

01-03-07, 06:51 PM		Volrath: So that's where my stuff went!

OOC: To those in the dark Crystalforged copied almost word for word the items I listed in Volrath's introduction. Thank you Crystalforged! The prepaid groupies are being sent your way as we speak. ;)
Yep, I just didn't feel like coming up with my own list any yours was handy. I figured Volrath wouldn't mind.

OOC: Also just a comment I don't think that even Kanatash and Caralot would use pears of agony for kinky stuff.
I'm actually not familiar with pears of agony although from the name I can guess its probably from the BoVD which I don't have.
ratslinky

01-03-07, 07:05 PM		OORatslinky: Hmm *sniff* I can't think of a way to start Gaz/Esabar's birthday party. Okay ive thought of a way.

*The deck is unuasally quite as most of the crew go about their various way of getting ready for a party. Jarlot is thinking up pick up lines as he dresses. Rose is trying to where somthing that isn't spoony and is failing. Kanatash is experimenting on crew members er I mean termanily ill rabbits. The party is scheguled to start at 12.00 pm*

Man in charge of filming: And now we float slowly thru the corridors and come to a closed door with a plaque marked Gaz and Esabar. We go thru and see Gaz arguing with himself while holding up two sets of clothing one set is average flamboyant teenage non emo clothing and the other is the cutest dress. Lets go over to the Audio guy and see what Gaz is saying.

Audio guy: Okay i'm now turning on the sound and we can here what he's saying. *turns on audio gear*

Gaz: No most people no me as a boy so i'm going as a boy.

Esabar: But its my birthday party as much as yours and the dress is so cute.

Gaz: Okay i'll make you a comprimise i'll go most of the party as a boy but i'll go as a girl for some of the time deal?

Esabar: Oh all right.

OORatslinky: Feel free to add to this hope you guys make this a good party cause if not then *draws his Sanity gun 2000*
urial angel of death

01-03-07, 07:52 PM		I'm actually not familiar with pears of agony although from the name I can guess its probably from the BoVD which I don't have.

OOC: A pear of agony is a real torture device. Its use is rather graphic, so I will hide the description in wheat colored text.

A pear of agony is a metal band in the vague outline of a pear, with a dial on its "knob" end. It is inserted into the ****** and then when the dial is turned the entire pear pushes outward.
cypher_zero

01-03-07, 07:56 PM		I take back what i said earlier *shudder*

cypher
rampant

01-03-07, 08:14 PM		Tirmek - must...resist...cake

Elina - You're cruel Sarah.

Sarah - (eating Tirmek's share as well as her own) I know, to top it off I have the cutest high heeled shoes I want him to try.

Yuan - :twitch:
ratslinky

01-03-07, 09:02 PM		Gaz: Don't worry tirmek thats not the main cake the just one of the first one. Want a glass of water :devil:

Tirmek: I don't like the look on your face so no

Gaz: Okay how about a beer? Hey what the *as Gaz says this his seal fades*

Sarah: :OMG! Gaz why didn't you tell us you had a seal?

Gaz: :confused: I didn't know i had one

Elina: Do you have any new powers?

Esabar: Yes he can now planeshift and greater teleport

Sarah: Sweet wish I got that

Gaz: Oh before my presents get handed out i have somthing for you guys. For you Elina *he pulls a book out of his jacket* an ettiquite book and for you Sarah and Tirmek well come see *he leads them down a couple of floors till they come to a door with a plaque saying Sarah and Tirmek* I decided to give you a room

EDIT: And his presents had better be good
Kaizer_Ryu

01-03-07, 09:21 PM		Ivy: You got the name wrong. *replaces the plaque with one that says Ivy and Tirmek*

Sarah: :mad: Hey! *switches them back*

Ivy: I'm cuter, so: *and again*

Sarah: :twitch:

Gaz: Uh-oh.

Tirmek: You did not just say you were cuter.

Ivy: *anime sweatdrop*

Sarah: :twitch: Grrrrr.......

Tirmek: Running might be a good idea right now.

Gaz: :( What did I do?

Tirmek: Not you. Him......er, I mean, her.

Ivy is now a red-headed blur.

Sarah: *Rainier Wolfcastle impression* The hunt begins...
Charles Phipps

01-03-07, 09:22 PM		*gives Kaizer a crazy award*
ratslinky

01-03-07, 09:26 PM		Gaz: Bad Ivy bad make a major image of a doorway where a wall is
Charles Phipps

01-03-07, 10:07 PM		*Sarah slides off the wall*

Rose: That had to hurt.

Ivy: Meep Meep.
Phantomcrossing

01-03-07, 10:52 PM		The half giant cooky runs about the kitchen watching after and trying to prevent destruction of the galley by the children of Satnak after his attempt of "sweet chili" which despite still being spicey, has sugar levels which may infact cause immediate imbalance of insulin in the humanoid body.

Norbaz: No, not the stove, for the love of pete, when did I become daycare!
rampant

01-03-07, 11:24 PM		Serene - Good thing those aren't humanoid bodies.
------------------------------------------------------------

Ivy - Crazy wolf girl!

Tirmek - ENOUGH!! (trips Ivy with a called spiked chain, then picks up Sarah by the scruff of her neck) Ivy I'm sorry, but I'm with Sarah. She is a wonderful person whom I refuse to betray. I will not allow intereference. Sarah cut Ivy some slack, would you be any less obnoxious should your situations be reversed. Gaz, Esabar, I must apologize, It would be best if i were not to eat any cake. The icing is almost pure sugar, which my system does not deal with well. Secondly, I'm afraid the room is rather premature. Though I assure you we all appreciate the humor.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-03-07, 11:50 PM		OOC: I'll get more done eventually, but for now I've updated Terra's Wiki and added some more spots for the rest of the kids (you've got four to fill out, Charles ;) ). And it just occured to me I still need to add Volrath and P/Y/R's kids. I knew I was forgetting something...

IC:

Sarah: :bigeyes:

Tirmek: Must...not...look...at...puppy eyes...

Sarah: Drat. *pouts*

*back at the party*

Sarah: We couldn't really think of anything you'd both want that you don't already have, so we got separate presents. This one's for Esabar.

Opening it, Esabar finds a book filled with blank pages. Despite it's size, it is surprisingly light.

Tirmek: We figured that you could always use a way to store and sort what you find. You don't even have to write in it. Here, place your hand here.

She puts her hand over a small crystal embedded in the spine, and feels an instant connection. It's almost as if the book was asking her to tell it what she wanted to write.

Elina: It links directly to you, and it will automatically store anything you want it to. Dates, names, faces, ramblings, gossip, useful and useless information, etc. It's nearly passive. You have to tell it when to stop or start, but otherwise it's hands free.

Sarah: And then we have this for Gaz.

Gaz: ...it's a piece of paper.

Elina: :devil: Slightly Psychic Paper(tm) to be exact.

Tirmek: So long as they have no psychic training, you can show this to anyone and they will see what you want them to. It won't work at the Academy or here very much, but it should be a handy little tool during adventuring.

OOC: A :cookie: to the one who first figures out where I got the idea for the Slightly Psychic Paper(tm).
Paulon

01-03-07, 11:54 PM		OOC: Psychic Paper? Dr Who.
ratslinky

01-03-07, 11:56 PM		*meanwhile Jarlot is forfilling his life long dream of drinking empty the entire plane of booze. When suddenly Rose decides to go in as well*

Jarlot: Rose how could hic you :weep: `

Rose: You where hogging it

Jarlot: Why you dashing my hopes of forfilling my life long dream die :headexplo :hoppingma

Rose: :eek: :OMG!
ratslinky

01-03-07, 11:59 PM		Gaz: I can think of some very useful ideas for this :schemes:
Kaizer_Ryu

01-04-07, 12:00 AM		OOC: Psychic Paper? Dr Who.
Here's your :cookie:
rampant

01-04-07, 12:12 AM		Sarah - *ears twitch* Oooooh the music is starting!

Tirmek (girl form) - Oh jeeze lemme go get changed ba-hack

Sarah Drags Tirmek onto the dance floor

Tirmek - My mom is here,...I can't dance in heels!
Paulon

01-04-07, 12:17 AM		OOC: Anyone else notice the abundance of cats on board? I feel sorry for the rats.

On the Forgotten Freedom the 'ordinary' rats are probably horrid fiendish dire rats. And given the nature of Fluffy and his family, the surviving ones must be very, very good at running.

#####################

Here's your :cookie:

Thanks. I'll have to stick that into my sig. And make a sig. :)

#####################

Curiosity. Strange place. Strange people.

Fela wanders through the birthday party, evading feet effortlessly, occasionally mooching some tasty-seeming canape from one of the partygoers. Previously she had been generally unnoticed at such occasions, but the first realisation about the guests is that many of the people present are quite aware of anything moving around them, even something as apparently harmless as a cat.

She is content to simply garner impressions of those present, and to listen for any tidbits of information that come her way. Something like 'Where in reality this Forgotten Freedom place is' would be welcomed...

Some folk seem distinctive... the one who the party was for seemed to have two minds. As if to make up for it, another, radiating spoonyness, seemed to have a serious lack of mental activity, as evidenced by his knack for almost tripping over cats without noticing them. Repeatedly.

Other categorisations include 'magical feline, male?' and 'wolf, female' in company, the latter naturally requiring a wide berth. Fela still had a few scars beneath her fur from her first encounter with a wolf pack, and treated them with caution.

And then something odd. 'Shadow/Power/Danger, Female and Something Unknown, male. Fela sniffed cautiously. Harmless, male, perfectly normal, no danger. The fur on her back raised as her tail fluffed out before she composed herself. The impression that darted through her head was 'Nothing at all is so perfect - Danger!' Fela backs away to vanish into the crowd, but behind her Yuan suddenly doubles over, caught up in a sneezing fit until his eyes are streaming with tears.
ratslinky

01-04-07, 12:30 AM		*Gaz dances past Tirmek and Sarah with some random girl. As he does so he his hands seem to blur for a moment then calm down again and he dances off into the crowd*

Sarah: Hey Tirmek where did you get the necklace?

Tirmek: What necklace?

Sarah: The one on your neck. Hey what happened your back in your male form and you have normal clothing

Tirmek: How did that happen :confused:. Oh well at least i can stand near mom without her looking at me strangly

*further off in the crowd Gaz is still dancing*

Gaz: *to Esabar* just wait till it gets to the next stage :evillaugh
DungeonJman

01-04-07, 08:49 AM		*Is walking across the deck with a perfectly square bottle, and within it is a perfectly square liquid.*

Please do not annoy me in any way, because i'm carrying a bottle of distilled essence of Daanvi and WAAAH.

*trips on the deck and the bottle goes flying*

That can't be good!
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-04-07, 08:51 AM		Bruce: Spider-due, spider-dude/Catches bad-guys with attitude—

Kitten: Could you stop singing that? :mad:

Bruce: Sorry, it's catchy. Though I think making yourself a suit that plays theme music is really self-obsessive.

Kitten: How many of these "super" heroes does this city have? We've seen Überman, Mithral Guy (OOC: Special thanks to Charles for this one), the Amazing Five, the Black Lantern (OOC: Again), Demontaunter, and now Spider-dude.

Bruce: I wasn't kidding when I said that another costumed crazy always popped up.

They are now finally on the elevator up the the airship docking tower. Kitten looks up at the assembled collection of elemental rings.

Kitten: So which one is the Forever Freedom?

Darastrix: Our ship's too large to dock on the tower directly. We have to board a skiff to take us there.

Kitten: Dad said that you could land it.

Bruce: There isn't a flat space big enough in the whole of Sharn to fit the FF!

The elevator stops. They emerge out onto a small platform where are tied up a variety of rowboats with tiny sails on the sides.

Kitten: Wait, how do these things fly without an elemental ring?

Bruce: Oh, you're forgetting that airships are made of things that float on their own.

Kitten: There can't be enough soarwood on Aerenal to make all these.

Bruce: They stopped needing soarwood when they found that electrified loadstone can push against Eberron's magnetic field.

Kitten: :thinks:…………………:confused: That makes no sense.

Bruce: Welcome to super-science! :D
Lord Kale Fangblade

01-04-07, 08:57 AM		a stream of bats came down from the cieling, circling the room a few times before forming into Sithis.

Sithis: Sorry im late. but someone *glares at a bat still hovering over his shoulder* gave me the wrong directions.

the bat then fuses with him. Sithis is dressed in a red and black glamerweave noble mans outfit, with a black sash about his waist. he carries no visible weaponry about his person, but its quite probable that he's got at least one knife or wand on him.
he looks around for gaz. and then starts patting his pockets, after a few seconds of searching he pulls out a box.

Sithis: i spent all last night working and i managed to create these.

he opens the box to reveal two rings, one that seems to shift in appearance the other is barely visible.

Sithis: the first one enhances your ability at illusion magic, as well as opening up a few spell slots. the second is a ring of greater invisibility coupled with a few defensive wards.

OOC: i leave the reply to Ratslinky
Kaizer_Ryu

01-04-07, 09:03 AM		As the bottle shatters, a screaming can be heard. Not from any one being. It is as if the forces of law suddenly cried out in terror, then were suddenly si-*WHAM* ow.

Fine. I thought it was funny. But seriously. Upon contact with the chaos magic inherent within the FF, the distilled essence of Daanvi went into the planar equivalent of catastrophic heart faliure. Only by quickly reforming the bottle with it's anti-entropy field is it able to avoid being completely destroyed.

Dramadar appears, takes a half-hearted swing at DungeonJ (misses badly) for being needlessly dramatic, and returns to Daanvi with the bottle in tow.
rampant

01-04-07, 11:56 AM		Lisa - I've never seen you wear your hair in a braid Corre.

Corre - I had mom use the ribbon from the Eighty Empresses school:D

Lisa - Congratulations! When do you start?

Corre - Next week! :( ... after that though I'll only be able to come home for holidays, and the 3-day weekend at the end of each month.

Lisa - That's rough.

Corre - Don't get me wrong its worth it, but still.

Lisa - I know. Why don't you put on one last dance for us before you leave?

Corre - :evillaugh:
DungeonJman

01-04-07, 12:28 PM		Stupid schools, everyone knows that true power comes from finding from within one's self, and from convening with the planes to get what you don't know.

*does a Strike of Perfect Clarity and accidentally hits a redshirt who flies into Pholly's lab and knocks over a bottle*

Pholly: :( Why must i suffer so? :(

*BOOOOOOM*

Darn it! Can i never go two posts without an explosion?
rampant

01-04-07, 12:38 PM		No
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-04-07, 12:49 PM		Ash "Listen Cole, an explosion, do you rember what that means?"

Cole "Every time Pholli's Lab explodes a kenku gets his wings!"
Paulon

01-04-07, 01:04 PM		Ash "Listen Cole, an explosion, do you rember what that means?"

Cole "Every time Pholli's Lab explodes a kenku gets his wings!"

Which leaves this question begging: Why doesn't Eberron have a population of roughly 99% Kenku by now...? :P
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-04-07, 01:16 PM		They get wings, they dont hatch. Also, dont ask whats in the chilli.
Paulon

01-04-07, 01:32 PM		They get wings, they dont hatch. Also, dont ask whats in the chilli.

I gave up on wanting to know that when I found out one of the ingredients was Kanatash's toenail clippings. :yuck:
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-04-07, 02:55 PM		I gave up on wanting to know that when I found out one of the ingredients was Kanatash's toenail clippings. :yuck:
OOcat: That begs the question: are they still incorporeal after he cuts them off?

Bunny: Only you have the stomach to ask that kind of question. :bored:

OOcat: :D
Kaizer_Ryu

01-04-07, 08:05 PM		Tirmek: So hang, on hang, on, hang on, hang on... Let me get this straight. You're betting me...that you are cool.

Lilly: Yep, I'm cool.

Tirmek: And if you're not cool, you've gotta change your name to...Kevin DuBrow. But if you are cool, I gotta spend a session with John and :coolcthul ?

Lilly: That's the deal, man. The total. Deal.

Tirmek: You're goin' down, spoony.

Lilly: No ways.

Tirmek: All right, let's see you be cool.

Lilly pulls out a pair of Cool Shades(tm) and slides them on.

Lilly: :cool: 'Sup?

Tirmek: ........................................ ...................

Lilly: :cool:

Tirmek: Oh, crap!
DungeonJman

01-04-07, 08:58 PM		*phases in*

No, no! You have it all wrong!

:teach:
The cool factor of one's self is determined by inherant coolness, which considering it is equal to awesomeness, is measured in kilowins. Now, considering it is a known fact that elves and half-elves are on the opposite side of that scale, and are measured in kilolosers, so the glasses would cancel that out. But your personal inherent spooniness comes from a seperate source, and thus is enough that even the cool shades can not cancel that out.
:teach:

All people: Huh? :confused:

The glasses only make him less spoony, they don't have enough power to make him cool. He'd need to have a device which counteracts his own inherent uncoolness, before he can be cool, and even then, it would only put him on the balance point.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-04-07, 09:10 PM		Terra: :mad: So Elves and Half-Elves aren't cool, huh?

Sarah: What should we do with him?

Elina: :devil: I have an idea. *whisper*

Terra: :plotting: Gate!

DungeonJ is sucked through a portal to the deepest levels of what even the Abyss considers Hell.

Strange Purple Dinosaur Thing: I love you! You love me!

DungeonJ: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!

OOC: I was going for this (http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail95.html) scene. It just seems too perfect for them.
Paulon

01-04-07, 09:18 PM		As DungeonJman finishes his explanation of how Lily's artificial aids fail to make him inherently cool in his own right, a brownish streak comes down the corridor, running as fast as possible. Jumping to get past the blockage in the passageway, Fela lands on Lily's head, a paw sending the Cool Shades flying. Barely slowing down, she continues down the corridor with a little extra speed from the drop.

A moment later a pack of carnivorous waffle irons race down the passage in hot pursuit, hopping around the gathering.. One of them lands on the Cool Shades, crunching them into fragments.
DungeonJman

01-04-07, 09:44 PM		*poofs back*

GAAAAH! Look, the idea wasn't made by me, it was produced by other E.B.N.E.'s who do not reside on this thread here (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=692629&page=15)

Messing with this involves messing with an E.B.N.E. so powerful that he has a horde of other E.B.N.E.'s who get angry when someone says that he's wrong and he pretty much has been called the embodiment of evil, a molydeus demon lord, the leaders of a space armada of some kind, and to top it off, the leaders of the tri-quad-multi-plex-verse roaches and ghosts council.
ratslinky

01-04-07, 09:46 PM		Gaz: Thanks Sithis these are so cool. Hey look at the time can you see Tirmek?

Sithis: Yes

Gaz: Keep watching him. 10... 9... 8... 7... 6... 5... 4... 3... 2... 1... 0

*Abucket of water apears over Tirmek head tips and all the water go's on his face. Then a transformation begins first he starts to melt then he keeps melting till he is all over the floor then he starts to turn chilli coloured then he turns into the chilli

Tirmek: (i.h.h) Hey what what happened to me. hmm it was probably the necklace. ahh well lets make the most of this. *Tirmek starts to move towards Lilly*

Lilly: Uh oh better run *he starts to run*

Gaz: Oh no you don't *waves his hands around and speaks gibberish suddely Lilly's feet are stuck to the floor*

Lilly: Agggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh heeeeeeellllpp *proceeds to get eaten by Tirmek but just as he is about to die Tirmek is forcibly transformed back into his female self*

Gaz: :rofl:

Sarah: Why hello Gaz :devil:

Gaz: :eek: *runs away*

Sarah: you won't get away from me

Gaz: *slips on ring of greater invisibility and teleports away*
Paulon

01-04-07, 09:54 PM		*poofs back*

A waffle iron, lagging behind the others in the cat chase, hops down the corridor and bumps into DungeonJman as it tries to get past him.

*BOOM!*

(OOC: No, you can't have two posts without an explosion somewhere. ;) )
Kaizer_Ryu

01-04-07, 09:56 PM		As Gaz attempts to move through the dimensions, he finds himself trapped between them.

Sarah: Invisibility doesn't help much against a hunter going on smell.

Gaz: And the detour?

Sarah: Shadows are not restricted by dimension.

Gaz: Well crap.

Sarah: But I'm not going to do anything.

Gaz: :confused: ...why not?

Sarah: You're going to help me pick out some accessories for Tirmek.

Gaz: I'm not sure that I shou-...wait, what?

Sarah: :devil:

Gaz: *raised eyebrow* Is this supposed to be a punishment?

Sarah: No. It's supposed to make Tirmek cuter. This is the only way I can think of to do that.

Gaz: :evillaugh
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-04-07, 10:14 PM		……a pack of carnivorous waffle irons race down the passage in hot pursuit……
OOC: You get the :detect: award for using a very obscure gag from earlier in the thread.
rampant

01-04-07, 10:32 PM		Tirmek - What kind of accesories?:confused:
ratslinky

01-04-07, 10:52 PM		Gaz: Well for a start a necklace that makes you taste like chocolate
DungeonJman

01-04-07, 10:54 PM		*walks in wearing a colonel's military uniform*

Right then! Stop this it's getting too silly.

Tirmek: What do you mean too silly.

It just is, now, MOVE ALONG, ALL OF YOU!

*points to the other E.B.N.E.'s*

Onto the next plot then. Get on with it. GET ON WITH IT.

army in the background: GET ON WITH IT!!!

*gets knocked out into the next room*

OOKaizer: YOU CAN'T DO THAT!!!
rampant

01-04-07, 11:01 PM		Tirmek - But Sarah likes strawberries

Sarah - its true

Gaz - *facepalm* not the point
--------------------------------------------------

Corre - :( bye guys, see you next month

Serene - Be good

Corre - I will mom *hug*

Satnak - Not too good

Corre - Don't worry mother *hug*

Dorvos - Hmmmmmmm

Corre - I'll write every week I don't come back, that's a promise. *hug*

Teiza - If you don't kick their butts, I'm gonna waltz in here and wail on yours.

Corre - :rolleyes: Promise sis *hug* Goodbye!

As her family teleports out, Corre picks up Tear, and heads for her dorm.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-04-07, 11:15 PM		Sarah: Either way, I'd like to figure out if he really tastes like he smells first. ;) :devil:

Gaz: And what's that?

Sarah: Cinnamon. By the way, I've got something new for you to wear.

Tirmek: *anime sweatdrop* Uh...don't I have a say in this?

Sarah: No. Now try this on.

She hands him a dark green strapless dress with matching heels with a jade necklace, earrings, and bracelet.

Tirmek: Wait a minute. Since when am I your-

Sarah: :bigeyes:

Tirmek: Must...obey...puppy eyes... *walks off*

Gaz: And to think I sunk five levels into Beguiler and I'm still not able to do that...

OOC: We don't always have to be right in the middle of a plot. Sometimes it's better just to screw around for a while. Makes the serious stuff more...well...serious.
DungeonJman

01-04-07, 11:42 PM		*is wracked with pain again, before he is sent to another part of the ship by an explosion*

(i.h.h.)

Eberron: You know, despite what you said, you're not doing anything!

DungeonJ: Look,since your in my head, i think you could be a little bit nicer.

Eberron: Well you have to do your job.

DungeonJ: Alright, but first you have to do this legally.

Eberron: Legally? :confused:

Lawful DungeonJ: *brings a heap of papers* Let's see, there is form 52.23.1-q " right for the unwilling inhabitation of a living being's mind" and form 32.6.7-f " legal right to force such a being to comply" Now these are in addition to normal forms, such as the form required to fill out forms and the form for being allowed to use a pen. All of these forms must be signed and done in triplicate, and then sent to Daanvi for processing before you can mess with my/ my client's mind any more. *drops the papers on Eberron*

Eberron: Aaaagh! *gets buried in a heap of papers before starting to fill out the forms*
rampant

01-04-07, 11:42 PM		Ketty - *sigh* As long as he gets you granchildren, as long as he gets you grandchildren, Etc.

Sarah - Whats bugging her?

Tirmek - (in the outfit from kaizer's post) She's conflicted: On the one hand she's not a big fan of my shapeshifting in general, and least of all spending time as a girl. On the other it seems to entertain you, since you and Elina are the only non-evil females I have a chance with she's not going to jepoardize it. So many ways to take revenge for the castor oil :evillaugh. Still not allowed to be a girl in the house though.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Izzy - Wait a tick you're evil?

Maladren - LE, ... with touch of benevolence feat.

Izzy - I think Someone put too much sugar in the punch.

Maladren - :pint: What's an evil mage girl gotta do to get some sweet sweet lovin round here *faints*

Izzy - ...
...

So the crazy reaction to sugar is a Rakshasa thing.
cypher_zero

01-04-07, 11:47 PM		Silver: Hmm... That's going to make the kinky stuff more complicated then...
.
DungeonJman

01-04-07, 11:55 PM		urge to randomly distribute sugar rising

(i.h.h)

*evil self gets hit over the head by the good self, with the baseball bat of goodliness*

Eberron: STUPID PAPERWORK!!!

Wait, so if i tied up the dragon who is the world in paperwork in my mind, does that affect the world in any way?
ratslinky

01-04-07, 11:57 PM		Esabar: *in lectuerer type voice* Gaz may not be able to do that to Tirmek but he can do it to everyone else plus he can dominate

Gaz: I can?

Esabar: Yes you can

Gaz: Ok that helps a lot but I need to be more effective against undead which is why i'm thinking about getting a few levels in cleric or favored soul
ratslinky

01-05-07, 12:02 AM		Everyone who has ever posted on this thread is given this :thumbsup: award for being so funny
Paulon

01-05-07, 12:04 AM		OOC: You get the :detect: award for using a very obscure gag from earlier in the thread.

Thankee. The waffle irons are one of the funnier jokes we've had. All the way from Freefall too. :)

################

Wait, so if i tied up the dragon who is the world in paperwork in my mind, does that affect the world in any way?

In the Eldeen Reaches, two old men are sitting on a bench, whittling. Clouds are gathering over head.

Old Man 1: Looks like snow.

Old Man 2: Ayup.

Slowly the masses of white drift down from above, blanketing the ground in a thick layer of...

Old Man 1: Looks like paper.

Old Man 2: Ayup.

Elsewhere, an overly literal member of the Ashbound grins evily as he applies a flame to the fallen paperwork covering the region...
ratslinky

01-05-07, 12:07 AM		*back at the party several people have passed out due to drunkeness and kithle is in the process of shaving their heads and painting hair on*
ratslinky

01-05-07, 12:36 AM		OORatslinky: This entire conversation happens in Gaz/Esabar's mind

???: Why hello Gaz my chosen

Esabar: *in secertary clothing* I'm sorry sir may I help you?

???: Yes i'd like to speak to Gaz

Esabar: I'm sorry sir he's busy but if you'd care to wait i'm sure he'll be able to make some time for you

???: What but i'm a god you don't keep gods waiting

Esabar: Yes we do strict policy no one see's him until he's ready

???: Oh all right

*later*

Gaz: Hey who are you?

???: I am the faceless one

Gaz: The who?

TFO: You know The nine The six and The one

Gaz: Oh right. So what do you want?

TFO: I have chosen you to be my Chosen one

Gaz: Say what?

TFO: Be my avatar and be the promise breaker

Gaz: Hey I can't be the promise breaker that Elina

TFO: There can be more than one promise breaker

Gaz: Oh I don't know i'm not sure OOKaizer would like that

TFO: Ok ok get a reply from Kaizer first then *stomps off*

OORatslinky: Guys I plan to have Gaz be his chosen one either way so Kaizer if your not really wanting him to be a promise breaker then I don't mind
rampant

01-05-07, 12:39 AM		Terrek - So you're one of the morons whos keeps chosing these people.

??? - WHAT THE HELL!

Chase scene ala Scooby do ensues
Crystalforged

01-05-07, 12:43 AM		Alright, lets all say it together.

WHO KEEPS CHOSING YOU PEOPLE!?



EDIT: Dang, Rampant got to it first.

EDIT2: By the way, do any of you have the "chosen one" song on hand? :devil:
Kaizer_Ryu

01-05-07, 12:57 AM		OORatslinky: Guys I plan to have Gaz be his chosen one either way so Kaizer if your not really wanting him to be a promise breaker then I don't mind
OOKaizer: The Promise Breaker is really a solo title. It may not be specific to a single person, but the idea is that only one being can have it at any one time.

Terra: :confused: I thought I was the One in the Sovereign Host.

OOKaizer: You're new, so that doesn't work. The One has been around for ages. Besides, I don't think you want to be him.

TFO: Dude, that's cold.

OOKaizer: It's true.

TFO: But...I'm, like, the ONE man!

Terra: Wait a minute... :eek: Oh, you've gotta be kidding me!

OOKaizer: Nope. The One is none other than Keaneu Jarlot.

Keaneu Jarlot: Whoa...

OOC: Sorry, when you said the One, it really spoke for itself. Take it if you want. It just had to be done.
ratslinky

01-05-07, 01:02 AM		OORatslinky: I was kinda thinking the faceless one was choosing his own promise breaker cause of what the sovreign host and dark six did to all his statues a form of revenge if you will. While the Jarlot thing is funny I think i'll make a personality for my self
Kaizer_Ryu

01-05-07, 01:10 AM		OORatslinky: I was kinda thinking the faceless one was choosing his own promise breaker cause of what the sovreign host and dark six did to all his statues a form of revenge if you will. While the Jarlot thing is funny I think i'll make a personality for my self
It's more of a position in the universe, a convergence of forces if you will. It's not a skill set or anything. Unlike the Chosen status, it doesn't give her any extra abilities. It's just that event's will happen around her that will lead to either her death or the falling of the Draconic Prophecy. What happens should she succeed is what's up for grabs right now.

Why do you think the gods (including the Silver Flame) would bother fighting over Elina if they could just create their own Promise Breaker? ;)

And the Jarlot thing wasn't intended to be canon. Just funny.
ratslinky

01-05-07, 01:14 AM		The Faceless One is doing more to create confusion and stuff but fair enough i'll just have him a chosen
Charles Phipps

01-05-07, 01:43 AM		Elina: La la la....

*Elina blinked as she met her drow counterpart*

Elina: Uh, you must be Lilly's new girlfriend.

Aline: Not quite, I'm actually Elina's sense of repressed urges.

Elina: What?

Aline: Your current activities have resulted in your conscious fragmenting as you focus on way too many things above your level.

Elina: It has not!

*A translucent Elven Elina said*

Elvish Elina: On the contrary, I Elina's intellect and point out that this is entirely reasonable given the great amount of power that you are exploring that simultaneously will eventually allow you to manifest avatars.

Elina: Oh My Goodness!

Dwarvish Elina: Ooooo Lassie we're going to have to kick some butt aboot in order to make the world safe for the Promise Breaker Prophecy.

Elina....my Dwarvish self is Welsh?

Undead Elina: Everything is pointless and I'll just stare at 13 while brooding.

Elina: Why does the undead me look like Miko?

Aline: Because Japanese undead girl versions of you are hot. Now go conquer the world.

Elina: What? NO!

Aline: You know you want to!

Elina: I do not!

Aline: Right, the more you deny it, the more I become physical!

Elina: FIGMENTS OF THE IMAGINATION DO NOT BECOME PHYSICAL!

*pause*

Elina: Okay, HERE they do but that's beside the point.
Charles Phipps

01-05-07, 01:45 AM		And besides, there's nothing to say that one of the gods can't think Elina sucks as the Promise Breaker and try to fill the Prophecy another way. :-)

Faceless One: As a changeling, I'm well versed in imitation.
rampant

01-05-07, 02:10 AM		Corre - 2c, this is it Tear.

Corre hefts her bag through the door to find a simple two room dwelling with one cot and the exra space filled with an extra desk. The bathroom is adeqaute if a tad cramped, and a litter box sits next to the toilet. There is a dark haired elven girl on the cot.

Elf girl - I've been waiting for you.

Corre - You have?

Elf girl - Yes, get your pet's litter box out of my room.

Corre - Why? its my room aswell.

Elf girl - Impossible, I was promised a single room.

Corre - It is a single.

Elf girl - Obviously :bored: , there's been a mistake this is the only remaining single.

Corre - Were you promised a room to yourself, or a single dorm?

Elf girl - What kind of question is that?

Corre - (i.h.h. Wow Tirmek was right when he said people who don't grow up near the island or the FF are different, that's a simple clarification) It's simple they put two people in the same room.

Elf girl - Ok know it all, why is there only one cot?

Corre - Only one of us needs rest.

Elf girl - If you think for one moment I'm going to meditate on the floor-

Corre - I said rest, not sleep.

Elf girl - What kind of idiot are you?

Corre - One with a precise grasp of common. (switches to Aereni dialect of elvish) Maybe this will be clearer, I don't require rest, or sleep, or naps, or meditation.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-05-07, 02:12 AM		Things have gotten a bit out of hand:

Inner Child Elina: You deny me!

Elina: Damn right.

Emo Elina: *brood*

Elina: Undead me is over there.

Paladin Elina: Purge these evil impulses and you shall be free to smite with impunity! It'll be ok because you'll be Good!

Elina: :bored: Uh huh...

Lust Elina: Yuan is just yummy, isn't he?

Envy Elina: He's not as pretty as me, though.

Greed Elina: He's mine, all mine!

Wrath Elina: DEATH TO ALL LIVING CREATURES!!!!!!

Sloth Elina: Chill out, girl.

Pride Elina: For the love of-! Stop stuffing your face!

Gluttony Elina: *muching on astral cake* What? Food is the same as love, right?

Elina: Ok, that's it. A Full Metal Alchemist parody is where I draw the line!

Winry Elina: :cloud9: Auto-mail! :cloud9:

Elina: GET BACK IN MY HEAD THE LOT OF YOU!

Yuan: *walking in* What is the matter, my Lady? You seem troubled.

All the Elina's: :drool: :love: :inlove: :cloud9: :drool: *collapse back into one*

Yuan: *anime sweatdrop*
rampant

01-05-07, 02:24 AM		Sarah - :mad: Stop picking on my sister *smack crunch pop AGH MY CLAVIN beatdown*

OOPhipps (bruised and bloody) - What are you doing here?

OOKaizer - And what the hell is a clavin?

OORampant - (same) - Hijacking Ookaizer's character, and I thought that was you.
-----------------------------------------------------------------


Elf girl - :confused:

Corre - I don't need a cot! Is that simple enough?

Elf girl - How dare you speak to me like that?

Corre - Like what?

Elf girl - Like an impudent street rat. I am Reshalin Shol d'Phiarlan. I know Baroness Elvinor personally.

Corre - I hope she speaks better common than you.

Tear - Meow (put me down I need the litterbox)

Corre puts tear down, while Reshalin fumes.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-05-07, 08:00 AM		EDIT2: By the way, do any of you have the "chosen one" song on hand? :devil:
OOC: All Bard's Tale music can be found here http://www.thebardstale.com/music.htm.
OOKaizer: Nope. The One is none other than Keaneu Jarlot.

Keaneu Jarlot: Whoa...
Jarlot: I wonder what took him so long to return.
**********
Keaneu Jarlot stands in front of a throne on a dias somewhere in the FF. Assembled before him are the Alt-Jarlots. Keaneu looks mildly frustrated.

Keaneu Jarlot: Okay, let's try this again. *megalomaniac two-fisted raise (aka Milking the Giant Cow)*

Alt-Jarlots: COBRAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Keaneu Jarlot: :nonono:
***********
Keaneu Jarlot: Eventually I got them to shout the right thing. *one fisted fighting stance*

Alts: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOZE! *mad rush for the refreshment table*

Keaneu Jarlot: :banghead:
Lust Elina: Yuan is just yummy, isn't he?
Elina's Lust appears again in a room on the FF.

EL: What, how am I still an individual?

Silver: Any advantage. :devil:
DungeonJman

01-05-07, 08:53 AM		(i.h.h.)

Oh great, this threatens to become exceedingly stupid and wrong.

Good DungeonJ: Then why don't you do something about it ???

Don't have the authority. On this ship you can't just do random acts of goodness, because most of the time it interferes with what the other E.B.N.E.'s want.

Good DungeonJ: Now i'm beginning to know how the Evil side feels when we don't let him do anything.

Eberron: *still filling out paperwork* THIS ISN'T FUNNY ANYMORE!!!

Lawful DungeonJ: Shut up! You need to fill out a form in order to say that!

Eberron: AAAAGH!
Phantomcrossing

01-05-07, 09:50 AM		Norbaz hurries to repair and restock the catering table in the room full of alt-jarlots during Keanu Jarlot's speech. Strange they asked him to be here considering past events...oh well, little do they realize that revenge was a hand...all the beer and various liqours, were NON-ALCHOHOLIC, disguised with the usage of several wands of prestidigitation!....and both the booze and the food were laced with a very very powerful gastrointestinal and upper digestive system afflicting poison that would soon be making its affects felt.

Norbaz: Damnit we're out of shrimp!

MenciaJarlot: Deet da deeeee!
DungeonJman

01-05-07, 10:08 AM		*random evil deity appears*

I AM THE LORD OF ALL THAT IS EVIL...AND PIE. NO THE TWO ARE NOT INCONSOLABLE, IT IS POSSIBLE THAT PIE CAN COME FROM AN EVIL SOURCE, DESPITE IT BEING LOVED BY ALL. WORSHIP ME...AND EAT PIE!!!!

*disappears*

Well, that was random.
Charles Phipps

01-05-07, 10:12 AM		That was actually your best post DungeonJman.

Mmmm Pie.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-05-07, 10:32 AM		Nalfein begins constructing an alter to the god of evil……and pie.
DungeonJman

01-05-07, 10:33 AM		Thanks, i got my inspiration from that Terry Pratchet quote:

Death: THERE IS NO MORE TIME FOR YOU. NOT EVEN FOR CAKE. FOR YOU, THE CAKE IS OVER. THIS IS THE END OF THE CAKE.
rampant

01-05-07, 12:00 PM		Reshalin - Who are you then?

Corre - (i.h.h. I'm doing this on my own) Corre Borisheel Tessier

Reshalin - peasan- (i.h.h. Oh gods she has tails!)- aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

The R.A. for the floor sticks her head in.

R.A. - What's the matter?

Reshalin - There's a monster in my room!

R.A. - That's not a monster, that's a cat, and a little cuttie at that. Come here you precious kitty.

Tear - *smug cat look*

Reshalin - I MEAN HER!

Corre - You know its rude to point:rolleyes:

R.A. - Nooo, that's Corre, she'll be sharing your bathroom.

Reshalin - She has tails! 4 OF THEM!!

R.A. - She's got fangs too, check'em out.

Corre - :D

Reshalin - :twitch:
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-05-07, 03:12 PM		Reshalin - :twitch:
13: I'm going like it here. :devil:
Kaizer_Ryu

01-05-07, 07:44 PM		Elina: Hey Ivy, have you seen-WHAT IN THE NINE HELLS IS ALL THIS?!

Ivy (female): :angelhide What?

Scattered about the room are various paintings, sculptures, image crystals, and full size photos of Tirmek. Ivy is placing the finishing touches on his latest painting: "The Happy Couple" featuring, of course, himself - er, herself...no, himse-...no, right now he's a she so...but e's true form is that of a male...GRRRRRR!!! WHATEVER! You know what I mean! - and Tirmek dancing through a field of flowers.

Elina: Why are you...? You know what? Nevermind. I just wanted to know if you've seen Aline anywhere.

Ivy: Last I saw she was with my brother on deck.

Elina: *sigh* I really didn't want to see him right now, but I can't put it off forever...

-----

Elina: We need to talk.

Aline: ('pathing) I'm a bit preoccupied at the moment fulfilling one of those repressed urges I embody.

Lilly: :cloud9:

Elina: He's gonna need to breathe at some point.

Aline: ('pathing) You're really missing out. He's a great kisser.

Elina: *groan*

*several minutes later*

Lilly is currently passed out from lack of oxygen.

Elina: I've been doing some thinking, and I know what it is I must do to get rid of you.

Aline: You're finally going to just conquer the world and be done with it?

Elina: Only fools set out to conquer the world. It is a transient goal that yields little but hate and resentment. The great King Galifar's mark lasted less than a millenium. And he was quite a ways from conquering only Khorvaire. Even the Quori and the Inspired couldn't fully control Sarlona, and they had almost two millenia before we took them out.

Aline: But that's what you want. I know as well as you do the truth in this.

Elina: I may succeed in breaking the Prophecy, but that does not mean what comes after will be any better. To ensure both it's fall and a new dawn...I will also guide this world.

Aline: Merely a semantic difference.

Elina: They are worlds apart. Forcing the people's hand gains me nothing, showing them the way gives them everything.

Aline: Instead of an Empress, they will have a Prophet. Brilliant. So long as you can pull it off, of course.

Elina: And therein lies the problem. Enjoy your time with him, for when I finally discover a means, we will be rejoined.
ratslinky

01-05-07, 07:46 PM		Gaz: So your back what does OOKaizer think about it?

TFO: Well Kaizer dosn't really want it but Charles is ok with imitation

Gaz: Ok i'll be your chosen and try out promise breaker but if I don't like it i'll quit promise breaker but stay chosen

TFO: Good now the first thing I need you to do is become all emo like Elina

Gaz: No way :ahem:

TFO: Okay then just do whatever Elina does towards breaking the Prophecy and try to claim credit

Gaz: Uh I think i'll pass she wouldn't be happy about that

TFO: *sigh* ok just do whatever and hopefully it will break the prophecy

Gaz: This promise breaker stuff sounds pretty boring

TFO: Well just try it for a while would you

Gaz: Oh all right
rampant

01-05-07, 08:18 PM		Tirmek - Seriously, Sarah we need to do something about Ivy.

Sarah - What's this we?

Tirmek - Ok, I need help and I have no idea who to ask for this situation, so that leaves the people who know him best. Amongst those I know you and Elina best, and don't particularly trust the rest of that list.

Sarah - Well I have one solution :devil:

Tirmek - My instincts are telling me to run away.

Sarah - She is kind of cute, and you said it yourself Rakshasa males are ususually part of their mate's harem.

Tirmek - I should have listened to my instincts. :nonono:
Charles Phipps

01-05-07, 08:40 PM		MUST HUG ALINE!

Lilly: Well in no way will my Little Drow Girlfriend backfire on me.

Thorn: BWHAHAHAHA!
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-05-07, 08:43 PM		Ash aproaches Elina
"If I may apologise for being so crude as to overhear, but I may have some small coal of council to offer"

Elina "What could you know about being the Promise breaker?"

Ash "Why nothing, thats entierly corect. But what do I know of power? Ahhh, now theres the spark is it not? I have been a vesel of power, I have weilded it and in the end, I have set it aside, what I seek, is not so easy to express."

Elina "I see, what do you advise"

Ash "Some people, they think that they can go unchanged by power, they weildit like a weapon, unsheathed only at need. These people never know what they weild, and blame power when it slips in there hand. Some think that they know how it will change them, and when thy are wrong they say that power corupts. both kinds of people are fools.

Then there is the path I seek to walk, not to weild flame, standing cold outside it while the sweet blooms of conflgeration unlock the charing perfume of imoliation, base matter made into a dance of heat and light, but to place myself within it, to be the flame. In this atleast I am within the flow of life, not forcing it, but guiding.

If you would lead without tyrany this is what you must do, place yourself within the flow, and govern invisibly, with the gentlest of touches."

Elina "and if I cannot?"

Ash "It you cannot? Look what happened when I faled to put myself amid the flame. A city was destroyed, ten thousand souls extingushed. I had tried to break myself into parts, ra-tok and Ashes and the beast. Now I know the truth, there is just a man, capable of good, capable of evil, strugling to acomplish iether. Heed the words of a ruin, she governs best, who governs least, so with men, with flames."
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-05-07, 09:14 PM		MUST HUG ALINE!

Lilly: Well in no way will my Little Drow Girlfriend backfire on me.

Thorn: BWHAHAHAHA!
OOcat: Wait, I just realized that Aline is Elina spelled backwards.

Bunny: Brilliant, Sherlock. :whatsthis

OOcat: I get no respect. But seriously, if we're doing an OOTS fan-parody then Aline has to be all dumb.

Aline: :eek: Why?

OOcat: Because you're Elan. Elina's Nale.

Aline: Um, how?

OOcat: Because she's TRYING TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!……………:confused: Where did that come from?

Pinky: Sorry, Brain.

Lilly: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! That would mean that Aline would become like—

Allez: :D Hiya!

Lilly: *run around in panic* I becoming my father!

13: You were like that a looooooooooooooooong time ago. Didn't even need destiny.
***********
Bruce: Behold, the Forever Freedom!

Kitten goes to the front of the airskiff for a better look. Not too far in the distance, over Sharn's necropolis, is a massive fat airship with no elemental ring but ringed by sail rigging.

Kitten: I expected it to be more………piratical. :ahem:

A shadow passes over the group. Kitten looks up to see a griffon keeping pace with the airskiff.

Gillamma: Dad, the Villain League just made a demand for world domination.

Bruce: By the Jolly Roger! :eek: Alright, get back to the ship and tell to crew to get ready to sail for Wroat. But first (gestures to Kitten) I'd like you to meet your niece.

Gillamma: Hello. I'm Gillamma.

Kitten: Okay, wait, so you're the one who changed genders.

Gillamma: Exactly.

Bruce (triumphant look): I can see it now before us.

Kitten: What? Where? The FF? :bored: Yeah, we've been seeing it for a while now.

Bruce: No, I'm talking about something much more important: the plotline!
rampant

01-05-07, 11:51 PM		First Day

The conditioning coach is a stern woman who reminds Corre of her mother, only she gives out less laps.

Coach Faiver - Ok The first thing in the morning you come here. Don't bother showering, In fact I'd advise you to just throw on your gym clothes and get down here. If you're late for this class I will keep you late, and trust me girls missing the breakfast bell is a bad thing. Just bring your toiletries here and use the showers here. Its the best way to make sure you get breakfast. Now today we will start light, we will focus on the warm up and cool down routines. After today you will do these before and after the day's exercise respectively.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-06-07, 08:24 AM		Bunny: GET TO THE KILLING PART!
Kaizer_Ryu

01-06-07, 11:28 AM		Lilly: I once saved Dol Dornmas all by myself.

Aline: Uh huh.

Lilly: ...ok, I admit dad helped me, but that doesn't detract from the awesomeness.

Aline: Riiiiiiiight. Suuuuuuuure you did. I'm still not sleeping with you.

Lilly: It's true! Here, check it out! *hold up an Image Crystal*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kdSPTQUcTGA

Aline: :STARE:

Lilly: See?

Aline: This explains SO much about you.

Lilly: Can we make out now?

Aline: Stupid male! *cracks her snakehead whip*

Lilly: :love:
Charles Phipps

01-06-07, 11:33 AM		OOC: You know that's not even that odd of an episode of DBZ
Charles Phipps

01-06-07, 11:43 AM		Yuan: Hey!

Ivy: Oh...uhhh hi.

Yuan: Is it just me or does everyone on this ship hate me?

Ivy: Well that's because you're fairly obviously a horrific evil sent by the Shadow to corrupt Elina.

Yuan: Huh?

Ivy: Oh come ON! You're a perfect guy that appears out of nowhere to start dating Elina.

Yuan: That doesn't mean anything!

Ivy: Uh huh, and it doesn't matter to you that she's on the Forgotten Freedom.

Yuan: Should it?

Ivy: Excuse me Tuxedo Mask but that terrifies more people than finding out that she casts Evard's Tentacles of Forced Intrusion.

*Yuan blinks in horror*

Yuan: She does?

Ivy: Much like Reily from the 4th season of Buffy, you're the new season replacement for the Lilly/Elina romance that's popular but unable to be done because Lilly is filming the Forgotten Realms movie.

***

Aber-Toril

Lilly: With the ruby pendant Drizzt, I'll convince them to band together to save Ten Towns!

Drizzt: And that's using your head. Remember, knowing is half the battle.

Narrator: G.I. DROOOWWWWWWWWWWWWW

***

Lilly: Hold up? I'm Regis? Bull :censored:

Ivy: So you can see why we don't trust you.

Yuan: Actually, I'm just a Birthright exchange student.

Ivy: ......a what now?

Yuan: It's a program where characters from different settings get to display themselves off and understand better the world around them. You sent one too.

***

Rokugan

Ketler: *reads from Eberron to Rokunese*So, Empress....me love you long long time!

*spears are pointed at Ketler's throat*

***

Lilly: I saw that one coming.

Ivy: Well I guess you're alright.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-06-07, 11:47 AM		OOC: You know that's not even that odd of an episode of DBZ
OOcat: Which is why—aside from my normal reasons—

Bunny: DIE FASTER!

OOcat: —I don't watch it.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-06-07, 12:07 PM		OOc: *sigh* Charles gets another :looloo: .
Kaizer_Ryu

01-06-07, 12:30 PM		Narrator: G.I. DROOOWWWWWWWWWWWWW
:tantrum: Must...resist...temptation...to make...campaign...based...solely...on this...line...! :tantrum:
rampant

01-06-07, 01:03 PM		Terra - ... Teiza i know you're upset, but you're here to learn, not to maul training dummies.

Teiza - *shadow blast* what training dummies *glare*

Terra - (i.h.h. ok that look is scar-ry, she's just like her mother)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Corre - No, that can't be right, you're using that constant as a variable.

Math instructor - But if thats a constant then...

Corre - Yes the answer is 42

Reshalin - Teacher's pet.

Anduarian girl - Show off

Karnnathi girl - Freak
urial angel of death

01-06-07, 04:00 PM		OOC: Lolth is Cobra Commander!

IC:
Lenneth: *aside* Soon my plan to eleminate Elina will be complete!

Myrr: It's not an aside if I can hear you.

Lenneth: Shut up.

Lenneth: Captain Jarlot, I challenge you to a battle of superfluously over-sized gigantic swords, to determine who is the greatest.

Jarlot: I except your challenge. I'm the greatest Cloud rip off on this ship!

Lenneth and Jarlot pull out identical sword that look as though they were designed for titans and appear about as sharp as butter-knives. They go at each other in a barrage of slices, thrusts, and parries. Lenneth "accidently" misses Jarlot slicing off a large portion of the mast, which appears to land on Elina.

Elina: *Walking out from behind the mast piece* That was close.

Lenneth: Blast!

Vladamire: *runnign out on deck* No one is allowed to try to kill my sister with an over sized sword except me!

OOUrial: There will be no apology for that pun.

Vladamire pulls out a katana so long that it appears it should fall apart with the slightest tap, and plungs it into Jarlot's chest.

Jarlot: *looks at where the katana is* You know what this means.

Vladamire: *realizing his position* Oh ****!

Jarlot grabs the sword blade sticking out of his chest to lift its wielder into the air and throw him off the FF's side.*

Vladamire: Grow wings, grow damnit!

* FF7 joke

OOC: In case you haven't guessed yet Vladamire, Lenneth, and Myrr are composites of my favorite characters ever.

Lenneth being the fighter heroes.
Myrr is a combination of the mage heroes.
Finally Vladamire is the villians
rampant

01-06-07, 04:40 PM		Satnak - Hun, we're out of chocolate.

Serene - :twitch:

Satnak - I know, I know, we just need to restock.

Serene - :twitch:

Satnak - We're heading back to sharn right now.

Serene - :twitch:

Satnak - Top speed, I prmoise hun. *anime sweat drop*

Serene - Get my bag.

Satnak - Got it. (i.h.h. she is so hot :drool: )
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-06-07, 04:58 PM		Silver (floating over Norbaz's shoulder): There's a really good reason you and Adrea need to get together.

Norbaz: —

Silver: And it's not one of my obvious ones.

Norbaz: :thinks:………………………I got nothing.

Silver: You'd be a completely normal relationship.
rampant

01-06-07, 05:38 PM		Silver - Plus I'd bet you could get a discount on those zombies you use to keep the chili feisty.

Norbaz - hmmmmmmm
--------------------------------------------------------------------

History

Professor Tub's pale form hovers just behind the podium, droning on and on about the history of the sublime way. At fisrt the class tries to relieve the boredom by tossing paper gliders about, when Tub fails to acknowledge the trouble makers, they quiet down somewhat. Even the novelty of tossing a paper glider through your teacher's incorporeal form wears off.

Corre - (i.h.h. why are they asleep now?) *returns to her notes*
----------------------------------------------------

OORampant - :cookie: to the first one to get the reference.
Crystalforged

01-06-07, 05:46 PM		OOC: You're not even trying now, Harry Potter. The ghost history teacher. I'd look up his name but I have to be to work in a few minutes
rampant

01-06-07, 05:55 PM		:cookie: for Crystalforged, the HP prof is Binns or something to that affect. Note: Tubs is a wraith.
---------------------------------------------------------------------

Dance

Dance instructor - Very good Corre! oh my (sees Tear tap dancing) :OMG!
DungeonJman

01-06-07, 06:21 PM		Wow, i've got a bunch of things to do.

*runs over to the giant sword fight and sighs*

DungeonJ: You fail to comprehend *in Master Fung voice (anyone who gets this will also know the origin of the Repel the Beast technique i used)* What matters is not the strength of one's size, but the size of one's strength.

Myrr: Huh?

DungeonJ: Observe *draws out his short swords and they go on fire*

STRIKE OF THREE TIMES DEATH

*hits Myrr with the swords 3 times in succesion (first the right, then left, then right) and sends Myrr flying over the side of the ship*

Jarlot: :mad: What did i say about the sword?

DungeonJ: It's not the sword, it's a bunch of swordsage manuvers put together. And remember, this is one of this combo's WEAKER forms.

*walks over to where Yuan, Lilly and Ivy are standing*

I hate to insult your honor, but you are lying about being from Rokugan.

Yuan: What? Explain what proof you have of this.

The aberrant dragonmark

Yuan: Uhhh...

Ok, now that that's done I can... *falls on the floor again*
______________________________________

Meanwhile, in his head, the good side of him is knocking on the door to the evil side's chamber... and he's carrying a fruit basket.

Good DungeonJ: Look, i came to apologize because i now know how it feels to be restricted in your actions and i wanted to say that i'm sorry. I also brought a peace offering.

*is knocked out and wakes up tied to a black stone altar in the middle of a red pentagram, with the evil side standing 20 ft away holding the basket*

Good Side: What are you doing??

Evil Side: Oh, the usual... *looks at the basket* what are these things anyway.

Good Side: *as the evil side is taking a bite* They're fruits grown in a hydroponics plant in Syrania, nurtured with blessed plant food and holy water.

*the evil one spits out the piece that he bit*

Evil Side: Utter rubbish, garbage! And not at all good!

Good Side: :weep: But it was the best thing that i could think of! I even made sure to get the ones that were tended by innocent children who enjoyed doing the work.

* the evil side begins scrubbing his mouth with a toothbrush*

Evil Side: Give me one reason why i don't kill you right now!

Lawful Side: *appearing seemingly out of nowhere* Because it wouldn't be a good idea, considering that in order to balance the equation, you've rigged it to kill me. We all know that you can't fight Eberron by yourself, and in order to preserve the balance, it'll kill you. And despite his will power, the main personality will eventually will wind down, resulting in an unforseen event.

Evil Side: :eek: You mean...

Lawful Side: Yes, a higher power will have full control of it's chosen one. And we all know what that means with Eberron...

(Note: I have more to write, but it's too long to fit in one post)
rampant

01-06-07, 06:43 PM		Good Dungeon - Why do I feel pink?

Evil D - CHAAALLLLLKY!!!
-----------------------------------------------
Weapon Drills

Corre - Oooh A Broadspear from Kythri! Thats a Gith'yanki Silver Sword! Omigosh thats a Sahaguin Trident! Sweet Sarah's mom is that a Karnnathi Broadsword!

Teacher - Corre stop ogling the display cases and get back to your drills!

Corre - Sorry:D
DungeonJman

01-06-07, 07:12 PM		OOC: Wait, how did Chalky get inside of my head? Also, wouldn't any weapon made in Kythri constantly change shape, as a weapon of chaos?

*Eberron finally finishes filing out the paperwork*

Eberron: You see what has happened, you are now forced to stop the promise breaker before the damage is done!

DungeonJ: I don't think i can really do anything to hamper her, she seems almost at full awareness levels

Eberron: I didn't say hamper, i said stop, as in terminated or sealed away permanently. And you'll also have to do the same to the chosen of Dol Arrah.

DungeonJ: Why?!?

Eberron: Because she is too much of a threat and will destroy the prophecy. Or even if you don't care, then she will endanger lives. And he must die or be sealed away, in order to ensure the balance, regardless of whether he will not hurt anyone, he would still be a threat to the balance. You have to learn to stop caring, in order to get your job done right. I may have felt opinions before i tried to stop Khyber and Syberis, but once i started, i felt no mercy or compassion, and i do not have any for them still, or for any of those who would threaten the balance of things the way they are on the large scale.

DungeonJ: That's....you're a monster.

Eberron: No, just inhuman, besides: if you leave things unbalanced, then something just as bad could pop up. And ruin lives just as bad. And don't try to get me out of your head, because that will yield the same result. I shall be here until the deed is done, by them or you, and if you don't listen, then you will have a spot on your consience for the rest of your life.

*wakes up*

_________________

This is how i see Eberron personified, as a force of extremist, radical, zealous balance, who won't let any side win, in order to maintain the natural order.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-06-07, 07:41 PM		*in Master Fung voice (anyone who gets this will also know the origin of the Repel the Beast technique i used)* What matters is not the strength of one's size, but the size of one's strength.
OOC: Xiaolin Showdown for Master Fung, but the phrasing is reminiscent of the Sphinx from the Mystery Men movie.
DungeonJman

01-06-07, 07:55 PM		Correct, so you get the :monk: award!
Kaizer_Ryu

01-06-07, 08:02 PM		Yuan: (to the awakened DungeonJ) Actually, my good sir, if you're exposed to Dragonshards of the right frequency and power, marks may manifest so long as you have the innate power. From what I've gathered, it's rare, but not unheardof, for Aberrent Marks.

DungeonJ: I still think you're full of it.

Yuan: You are free to believe that. But there is something I am entirely serious about. I will not allow you or anyone else to harm my Lady in any way.

DungeonJ: :confused: I thought you didn't like fighting?

Yuan: I never said anything about fighting.

He rolls back his sleeve, revealing the beginnings of a large Dragonmark. Placing his fingers on it, he utters an incantaton. But nothing seems to happen.

DungeonJ: Oooooooookay...

Yuan: I have named my mark the Mark of Protection. Aside from shielding myself, I can provide protection to those I choose. My Lady is the main beneficiary of it's powers right now.

At this time, Nalfein comes across the two. Seeing an easy target in Yuan, he readies to immolate him.

Nalfein: FIREBA-............? :confused: You know what? I'm bored with this. :bored: *walks off*

DungeonJ: :twitch: Nalfein...didn't feel like...torching someone? :twitch:

Yuan: Fighting is not always neccessary. Far more good can come from diffusing the will to fight than from any amount of violence. It is my wish that my Lady will take this to heart. I will be by her side no matter what path she takes, but I will ensure my Lady does not lose herself to the mission.

DungeonJ: ...you really mean that? It's not just an act?

Yuan: Many people find something worth killing for. Many also find something worth dying for. I have found something, or, more accurately, someone worth living for.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-06-07, 08:11 PM		Correct, so you get the :monk: award!
OOC: Sometimes it's just timing. Crystalforged got the Harry Potter one because he posted before someone else.
DungeonJman

01-06-07, 08:26 PM		(Xiaolin Showdown ripoff in here, don't say anything)

Well, that is very admirable, Yuan, if you can manage to do that, then you have my full admiration and respect. You have a power that many idealists would dream to have, and you are using it for a person who you care fully about, may you always use it wisely.

(i.h.h.)

And as for you Eberron, I realize that despite being the conduit for all life, you care not for it, and thus I see you now for what you are and not what for what you pretend to be.

REPEL THE BEAST !

*blasts Eberron hard enough to force it out of his mind*
ratslinky

01-06-07, 08:27 PM		OORatslinky: And now for the story of our favorite dark elf Dri'bble Do'Hursen with his two swords Twinkle Twinkle Little Star and Icreamcakedeath.

Dri'bble: Oh woe for I am brooding

Brineteeth: Now now laddie no need for that lets go kill some ork

Kittiebrie: Aye count me in on that

The Really Strong Guy With The Cool Hammer: Yes Brineteeth thats a brilliant idea

Dri'bble: *brood* Oh ok

*Later*

Brineteeth: Die ye scumbag of an ork

*Scene with lots of ork killing*

Big Bad Demon Guy: So you have defeated my army now you shall face me prepare to die

T.R.S.G.W.T.C.H: Die monster *throws his hammer at the demon*

B.B.D.G: Hahaha only the sword Icreamcakedeath can destroy me and I hid it in the hoard of the dragon guy in the north

Dri'bble: Oh woe to you for I have that sword *cuts off demons head*

B.B.D.G: Oh woe for you have banished me for a thousand years

Brineteeth: Ha not so tough now are ye sonny

THE END
Kaizer_Ryu

01-06-07, 08:32 PM		:heehee: That was your best one yet, ratslinky. :D
urial angel of death

01-06-07, 08:52 PM		Myrr: *still falling* Why did he hit me?

Lenneth: Because no is stupid/brave enough to challenge a compination of Cloud, Lenneth Valkyrie, Link, and various other video-game heroes to melee combat.
rampant

01-06-07, 09:00 PM		Dorvos - Hmmmmmmmm

Teiza - Grrrrrrrr Come back here and fight like an abberation!

Dorvos - Hm:P (catches Lenneth and Myrr)

Myrr - Oh gods this is embarrasing:mad:

Lenneth - I know, Saved by the bard:(
Kaizer_Ryu

01-06-07, 09:09 PM		Vladamire: *emo villain single tear* Why does no one save me?

*phases out and reappears deep in the Forgotten Freedom near a large machine*

Stewie: Blast! The targeting system is still off. I require a being of great and terrible power in order to finally be rid of that vile matron!

Aerith: Now, Stewart, no releasing ancient horrors. You've got plenty of other toys to play with. And look! You're brother is here. Why don't you two play a game?

Stewie: :plotting: :evillaugh

Vladamire: No way am I helping you. If being a composite of villains including Sephiroth has taught me anything, it's DON'T KILL THE HERO'S GIRLFRIEND!
rampant

01-06-07, 09:28 PM		Tirmek - Sarah?

Sarah - Yeah?

Tirmek - Can I take off the bow yet?

Sarah - Just a couple more shots.

JJ - Say cheese
DungeonJman

01-06-07, 09:55 PM		Uh, this is a kind of important question that i need to ask cypher. Does the Orange Period of DOOM! (tm) actually do anything, or just look menacing? The lives of an entire guild may depend on it.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-06-07, 10:05 PM		JJ - Say cheese
OOcat: It's nice to see that little characters can get used.

13: Since you're too lazy most of the time.

OOcat: :( What do I have to do to get respect?

Silver: Think up something funny.

OOcat: Fine.
********
Kitten: So why Wroat?

Igor (refined British accent and wearing a butler suit, but still Igor): Perhapth thith can provide a clue? (holds up a picture)

Kitten: Isn't that Sean Connery?

Igor: Clothe.

Kitten: Wait, I remember a rule about this back home…………It's Boranel.

Igor: Correct. And do you know what that rethemblenthe meanth?

Kitten: It's like Elan in here.

Igor: The entire royal family ith living a thpy movie! We're going there to pick up Boranel and his thon.

Kitten: King Steve? He's useless.

Igor: No, thith ith another thon. At the rithk of a thpoiler on the third Authtin Powerth movie……………
************
Standard dark room with a large round table in the middle and half-shadowed villains sitting around it.

Skeletel figure: Okay, this meeting of the Villain league is called to order. Now, we've made our demands to the world, the question is: how do we actually go about doing it should they not give in?

Someone not sitting at the table: You people are pathetic. Dad, I can't believe you hang out with such a group of losers.

Bald guy with the silver suit: Please ignore her: she's going through that *air quotes* rebellious */air quotes* phase. Now, I've got this new plan, which I like to call *air quotes* Preperation H */air quotes*—

Rebellious teenager: Oh, yeah, like A through G worked great.

Bald guy with the silver suit: What, you don't like Preperation H?

Rebellious teenager: No, I'm sure Preperation H feels good on the whole.

The Skeletal figure puts its head very slowly on the table, revealing that it is Errandis d'Vol.

d'Vol: Steve, why did you have to bring her?
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-06-07, 10:06 PM		Does the Orange Period of DOOM! (tm) actually do anything, or just look menacing? The lives of an entire guild may depend on it.
OOC: It's for spacing. He said so once.

(campy super-hero tone) No, no need to thank me *strike heroic pose* just doing what any brave citizen would have done. *flies off*
DungeonJman

01-06-07, 10:11 PM		Oh great, we at the guild of paladin's are so dead.
cypher_zero

01-06-07, 11:46 PM		Foresoothe! Ye art gravely wrong mortal! Listen ye to yon tale of the Orange Period of DOOM!(tm)

(Said in voice of Narrator from Dark Crusade)
"And so it came to pass that the ruler of a fair realm did pass a law and unto the land came great joy and happiness and children did laugh, and women did play and do all kinds of merry stuff. But, an evil wizard-lawyer discoverd that if yon law had the Period of DOOM! stricken from it; as the king had used it many, many times throughout the legal document; then the very spacing of the document would collapse, bringing different meaning to the law which would allow him to take over the land. And so the Evil Wizard-Lawyer did cast a spell most foul upon the castle and removed the Period of DOOM from the kings law! He then came to rule the land and dark times fell upon it and the children did cry and the women did weep and the men did stay out late and get drunk and come home only to be scolded by thier wives for staying out too late and getting drunk and all kinds of other bad things did happen!

"But Lo! The Orange Period of DOOM! (tm) did come to the land and rid it of the Evil Wizard-Laywer and Spacing did once again prevail and good times were had by all and blah blah blah, merriment.... blah blah blah... children.... And the kings law was forgotten and the people hung their king because he was stupid enough to make an entire legal document depend on the use of a single Period of DOOM! And so the king's Wizard-Lawyer did come... Ya know what? Screw it. It's important for spacing. Spacing! :tantrum: SPACING!!! And there is nothing more important to good writing than Spacing. Excpet words. Words are important too."
.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-06-07, 11:53 PM		Oh great, we at the guild of paladin's are so dead.Nalfein does his happy dance, till he realizes that he doesn't get to kill them all himself. He then goes and sulks when he also realizes that he can't get to them due to them being mostly made out of Entities that have yet to break the 4th wall.

-----

OOC: This is a scene I'm doing as part of urial's way far future thing.

IC:

On their way back to the main building, the tour cancelled due to bad weather, Nalfein and Terrek discuss the absent Terra (she was left with the sick dark young (http://members.shaw.ca/csstrowbridge/Tulzscha/DarkYoung.jpg) along with Reman).

Nalfein: I was wondering...Dr. Branford. ...she's not...available, is she?

Terrek: *defensively* Why?

Nalfein: *pause* ...I'm sorry. You two are...? :smirk:

Terrek: *again defensive* Yeah.

Nalfein: Right. ...I'm always on the lookout for a future...ex-Mrs. Malcom.

OOC: Just for that, you get a :looloo: award, cypher.
ratslinky

01-06-07, 11:57 PM		*Dorakvanesh the red greatwyrm of the wyrmsperch mountains felt a dark presence come into his cave he looked around but saw nothing*

Dorakvanesh: So little one you hide from me with magic you should know better

Gaz: Greetings Dorakvanesh of the wyrmsperch mountains I have come with questions and I require answers

Dorakvanesh: And why should I give answers to one who allies himself with the promise breaker?

Gaz: I have come not on behalf of the promise breaker in fact i have come to ally myself with the dragons in stoping it *bluff*

Dorakvanesh: Hmm I may answer your questions

Gaz: Oh would you please :bigeyes:

Dorakvanesh: Oh all right ask away

Gaz: How do you break the prophecy?

Dorakvanesh: I don't know *bluff*

Gaz: *suceeds sense motive* Ah well. I only have one more question

Dorakvanesh: And what is that?

Gaz: Would you prefer to be shot or stabbed?

Dorakvanesh: Huh *a etheral crossbow bolt fly into the center of Dorak's heart before becoming real and expanding* :ghosted:

Gaz: Now I will have my answers *he takes a scale from Dorakvanesh's head before getting out his portable hole and collecting all the money*

Esabar: It will take a while to set up a divination to find out more about the prophecy until then we won't know how to break it or control it
DungeonJman

01-07-07, 12:03 AM		Pfft. That's a waste of time. Everyone knows that in order to break the Prophecy, you simply have to *gets knocked out by the avatar of Eberron that he forced out of his brain*

Eberron: NO! You may have stopped being my chosen, but there's no way i'm letting YOU break the prophecy.

DungeonJ: Must i be beaten up by the avatar of every Progenitor Dragon? No wait, the answer is probably yes. *passes out*
Kaizer_Ryu

01-07-07, 12:19 AM		Achika: You know, I've been wondering...why are you so obsessed with protecting the false prophecy? The true prophecy is what we laid down before you sealed me away. This mockery perpetrated by the Children of dear Syberis serves little purpose other than to stagnate and bring about the end times that much faster.

Eberron: Breaking it throws everything out of balance.

Achika: Things are out of balance NOW. Nothing moves forward. Nothing truly changes unless the Forgotten Freedom interferes.

Eberron: :rolleyes: And we all know how well that goes.

Achika: Allowing this world to fester and rot is not the same as balance, and you know it.

Eberron: They are still fools.

Achika: At least they seek their own path. For that, I give them a grudging respect. Too bad most of them must perish.

Syberis: That is where you are wrong. My Children may be on the wrong path, but correcting it does not require bloodshed.

Achika: And that...is why you lost.
DungeonJman

01-07-07, 12:22 AM		(i.h.h. while lying on the floor)

Wow, i'd hate to see what i'm going to end up doing to be beaten up by the avatar of Syberis. Wait, doesn't this mean that a prophecy still controls what happens regardless of what Elina does. Also a paradox: If Elina is fated to rule or guide the world by the prophecy which she is destined to break, doesn't that mean that she destroys her own chance at rulership?
Kaizer_Ryu

01-07-07, 12:26 AM		The true prophecy is more like what you described before, an everchanging set of possibilities. It is designed (as I see it, Charles may disagree) to keep the world moving, changing. There is no point or purpose other than that. The Prophecy Elina is trying to break is the Draconic (false) Prophecy, and it says that she will destroy the world, not rule it. What happens next is up to those living in the world, since they will be in charge of their own destiny.

Scary, isn't it? Most people SAY they want to rule their own destiny, but a scarce minority actually mean it.
Paulon

01-07-07, 12:29 AM		OOC: Wait, how did Chalky get inside of my head?

The usual method involves yanking chunks off and eating them until he gets in. Though normally he seems to prefer to eat the insides of heads rather than paint them.

I could always think up a more IC explanation event :evillaugh - but I think you'd prefer the one above. To be honest, somehow you make it extremely easy for me to pick on your EBNE self with amusing harassment ideas, so I'm trying to avoid the temptation. It's not fair on you to make you a target, and too much of that kind of 'humour' kills any intended joke.

#################

Yuan: Many people find something worth killing for. Many also find something worth dying for. I have found something, or, more accurately, someone worth living for.

The dramatic-seeming ending to Yuan's speech is slightly spoiled as he begins to sneeze. Wandering past, Fela seems to be paying little attention to the conversation, but her mind is somewhat more focused as she tries to work out what Yuan really is.

"Apparently perfect, protective power, allergic to me. Nothing else to be seen."

The feline is interrupted as Lily, oblivious as usual to anything that might need perceptive abilities or spot checks, trips over her, giving Fela a painful kick. The cat yowls in anger, and the fallen Son of Spoony feels a new set of pains as something resembling a crocodile takes a quick bite out of his leg.

As blood runs from the toothmarks, Fela resumes her normal cat guise, back up, tail bristling to twice normal size, and hissing angrily. She turns and stalks off in high dudgeon. Fela's thoughts now are less than flattering: "Clumsy, idiot, blind, so stupid he hurt himself by believing in a basic illusion."
ratslinky

01-07-07, 12:32 AM		Gaz: Aha gotcha *grabs Syberis and teleports out* ok I had been planning to scry and stuff but this is faster * ties Syberis to a chair and casts charm monster*

Syberis: Thats doesn't work

Gaz: I know but the distraction let Esabar read your thoughts and i know you are immune to that so I created she created a spell that could only affect you now we just have to decipher your thoughts and we'll know how to destroy the prophecy :evillaugh

Syberis: F you
Charles Phipps

01-07-07, 12:36 AM		You get a crazy too Mooncat.

Also you Kaizer for Stewie and Aerith ;-)
DungeonJman

01-07-07, 12:37 AM		No, wait, i thought that it said that she would send the world into darkness or something, well doesn't matter. *gets up* Well only one thing left to do. This is for using me as a pawn in your plans, Eberron, i am no one's, pawn, the good i do is my own, and not manipulated by anyone else. Since you're an avatar, and not the real thing, this won't effect the world itself.

Eberron: Oh come on!

STRIKE OF TEN TIMES DEATH

(Note, this does the equivalent of 50d6 points of damage, so you figure out what it does. Saddest part is, it can get much more powerful than this, and this combo is in the actual rules.)
Charles Phipps

01-07-07, 12:41 AM		Rose: Darkness, destroy it, blah blah blah.

Terra: don't you care?

Rose: Not really. The whole thing about the Promise Breaker prophecy is that in the thousands of years we've been under its control No One Noticed. So either the Dragon's control is much less than they think or people really aren't deserving of Freedom.

Jarlot: Not very Chaotic Goodness is that?

Rose: That was Lawful Evil thought for today and I can go back to Chaotic Goodness.
rampant

01-07-07, 12:50 AM		Teiza - Grrrah!

Dorvos - hmmmmmmmm:rolleyes:

Teiza is struggling violently to get to her favorite pillow ( the one that looks like a dragon skull) while dorvos fends her off with one hand on her forehead.

Teiza - *waves her hands in a quick pattern, her shadow performs a slightly different set of hand motions*

Dorvos - Hmm-hackcough

Dorvos drops the pillow as liquid night ink wells up in his mouth.

Teiza - *grabs the pillow* :P
DungeonJman

01-07-07, 12:55 AM		Seems sort of interesting how a person can turn their back on their beliefs, and then instantly change back. For the record, wouldn't you lose your bardic abilities during that period and become depressed.

Rose: NO WAIT, YOU CAN'T MENTION THAT!
*loses his bardic abilities and begins to mope*

Terra: I would say that that was pretty mean, except that this is Rose we're talking about.

DungeonJ: I just bring up the rules, reality does the work. That's what happens when the inherently lawful part of me takes over.

*pulls a book out of a vortex and begins to read it*

Wow, you wouldn't believe how messed up this thing is.

Terra: What are you reading ?!?!

DungeonJ: Oh, it's not the book, it's an index of martial manuvers, it's just that the damage to the timestream that was required to get this book is pretty messed up.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-07-07, 08:42 AM		You get a crazy too Mooncat.
OOC: Well, I'll accept it, but that post was nowhere near as good as your stuff.
…………………………………………
Was it for the King Steve/Dr. Evil joke or the campy super-hero?
Charles Phipps

01-07-07, 08:58 AM		Boranal as Connery.
DungeonJman

01-07-07, 09:18 AM		Terra: Why'd you need to mess with the time stream in order to get the book?

DungeonJ: Because some of the techniques in here haven't been documented yet. Plus i figured that you'd be interested to know who the author is. Well, Satnak and Serene would be more interested to know who it is, but that's beyond the point.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-07-07, 09:45 AM		Boranal as Connery.
OOC: BUT THAT WAS YOUR IDEA!

"327. King Boranal is not Sean Connery, I don't know why the crew keeps using Sean Connery's accent to imitate him."

(gives back :looloo: )
Charles Phipps

01-07-07, 10:14 AM		OOC: I'd completely forgotten that.

But no, the rest is equally worthy anyway.

:-)

Presentation is 9/10 of the :crazy:
DungeonJman

01-07-07, 10:22 AM		Studying magic may help you in many ways, it will get rid of your troubles, but there are a few things you should know:

They may include: invocations, transmutations, healing subschool of conjuration, evocation, abjuration, reading your foes minds with divination, but it's worth learning them all, for the magic you need!

Yet another random post.

Also, do not click this. (http://mimir.net/mechanus/index.shtml) It may be in Greyhawk, but it will hurt the minds of anyone on this board. Except me, i've read the whole site several times over.
Charles Phipps

01-07-07, 10:52 AM		Ivy: Okay, here's an introduction to the crew. That's DungeonJman.

Yuan: The Big Paladin fellow?

Ivy: Yeah. He sort of thinks its his chosen destiny to guide the Promise Breaker to goodness.

Yuan: Is it?

Ivy: Well he's not from this world, he's got a split personality, he doesn't actually know anything about the Prophecy, and no one really cares about the Prophecy on the ship but him. I'll let you decide.

Yuan: Uh huh.

Ivy: Rose said he's also a kill stealing :censored: tard.

Yuan: Okay...

DungeonJman: GANON WAS EVIL! WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO!?!

Rose: I HAD HIM!

Yuan: Whose that?

Ivy: That's Andrea. She's the ship's Necromancer and Doctor when our existing cleric is too :censored: out on dream lilly injections and liquor. One of the crew stalks her but she pretends not to notice when he steals her underwear.

Yuan: And the pink lady with the red hair?

Ivy: Oh that's Aerith. She's Jarlots wife. The little kids around her are Jarlots' daughters.

Yuan: Aren't those the Sailor Senshi?

Ivy: Yeah, we didn't mention them because we've got enough problems without another magical girl.

Sailor Flame: IN THE NAME OF THE FLAME I WILL PUNISH YOU!

Aline: YOU STUPID MALE!

Ivy: That's Aline doing her Asuka impression. Basically, if any anime girl has ever been a :censored: she's got her personality in her somewhere.

*Lilly is kicked into a nearby wall*

Ivy: You've met my brother.

Yuan: Is it just me or is this entire ship a rip off of Final Fantasy mixed with Skies of Arcadia and some Legend of Zelda?

Ivy: No, we've also got some Chrono Trigger.

Magus: YOU WILL ALL BOW BEFORE MY AWESOME ARCANE MIGHT!

Ivy: I look forward to when we go visit the past and discover that Eberron is actually a gigantic demon thing that we have to kill because he made civilization in order to eat us

Yuan: Is that true?

Ivy: I wouldn't be surprised, I mean when you make the Dragon Prophecy evil then you know nothing is sacred.

Yuan: Well at least you haven't brought back any major evils.

***

In a place surrounded randomly by flames, a bishounen with a katana stands

Evilroth: Muhahahahhahahahahhaha.

Igor: Master, aren't we burning to death?

Evilroth: Hush you.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-07-07, 11:25 AM		In a place surrounded randomly by flames, a bishounen with a katana stands

Evilroth: Muhahahahhahahahahhaha.

Igor: Master, aren't we burning to death?

Evilroth: Hush you.
OOcat: Blasphemy! Igor would never question his mathter.

Igor: I do have a thelf prethervathion inthtinct.

OOcat: Oh, right. Anyway, Igor is supposed to serve the causer of all crazyness (aka Jarlot).

Igor: Well, who elthe would be both a bithhounen and burn himthelf in a wildly flamboyant ritthual?

OOcat: That makes a lot of sense. In fact, all evil makes sense now.

Jarlot: "……let's set sail with Captain Morgan…"
DungeonJman

01-07-07, 11:38 AM		Ahem, it's swordsage now, not paladin. And it wasn't my job to do that, it was supposed to be my job that if either one got too powerful, i was supposed to even out the equation.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-07-07, 11:59 AM		OOKaizer: A Swordsage Entity. A.K.A. you can't do anything useful. None of us really can. Anything we do in character must be either useless, pointless, or some combination of the two. Why do you think we tolerate getting beaten on so much? Because, deep down, we all know we deserve it. :D

Elina: *pulls out the Breaker 2.5* Yes. Yes you do.

OOKaizer: RUN AWAY!

-----

Yuan: I have been meaning to ask. Were you not a male originally?

Ivy: Yep. *poses*

Yuan: *anime sweatdrop*

Ivy: Gender has lost almost all meaning here.

Yuan: That would explain my Lady's parents. I deeply regret even inadvertantly overhearing...that.

Ivy: I didn't think you had it in you to snoop.

Yuan: Oh, Heaven forbid. I was three floors down and walking by Ms. Silence's room as she listened to extremely loud music that reminded me of cats scraping their claws on a chalk board while having their tails pulled.

Ivy: That's all? Man, you gotta try harder if you don't want to hear that. They've soundproofed their room, but if they go anywhere else... *shudder*

Yuan: That seems rather improper.

Ivy: It's a PIRATE ship. The fact that they seal off the area to prevent irreperable mental scarring is courtesy enough.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-07-07, 12:28 PM		Ivy: That's all? Man, you gotta try harder if you don't want to hear that. They've soundproofed their room, but if they go anywhere else... *shudder*

Yuan: That seems rather improper.

Ivy: It's a PIRATE ship. The fact that they seal off the area to prevent irreperable mental scarring is courtesy enough.
Silver: Or you could become a conesseur, such like myself.

Bunny: With the exception of Ketler, no one on this ship would take you up on that suggestion. No one is that crazy.
rampant

01-07-07, 12:53 PM		Serene - Hello Ivy.

Ivy - Oh Hi Mrs. Tessier, This is Yuan ...Something, He's Elina's boy friend.

Yaun - I don't think thats quite apropriate.

Serene - She playing hard to get?

Ivy - He is.

Serene - :twitch: ... Hold on a second. -exits-

Satnak comes by, and wumps Yuan upside the head, putting said head through the mast.

Satnak - What under the moons is wrong with you? -exits-
Charles Phipps

01-07-07, 01:07 PM		Ivy: I wonder if anyone will ever realize that when I was reincarnated as a changeling bard, all this gender bending became perfectly natural.

OOCharles: SHhhhhh!
Kaizer_Ryu

01-07-07, 01:19 PM		Yuan: *bruised* So that's what it is like to be hit by Satnak.

Ivy: You took that rather well for someone who doesn't fight.

Yuan: Does not like to. I am familiar with combat, I merely avoid it unless absolutely necessary.

Ivy: Ah hah!

Yuan: :confused:

Ivy: You're a Bard! At least one class has gotta be! No other class talks like that and can be as nice as you. Or get people not to care that it's possible that you could be a psychotic evil serial rapist who's just really good at being polite. Hypothetically, of course.

No offense.

Yuan: None taken.

Ivy: But still, she's got a point. Why in Xoriat aren't you making out with her consantly?

Yuan: A gentleman would not 'make out' with anyone merely on a whim, nor would he do so so early in a possible relationship. My goal is her happiness, but I cannot be certain that I am the right man to be her partner.

Ivy: :rolleyes: You have no idea of the number of low cards in this deck. Her getting you is like drawing a Royal Flush out of a deck made of jokers.

Yuan: :embarrass You flatter me, but-

Ivy: No buts, mister! Right now your refusal is making her miserable. As her friend, I have conflicting feelings about you. On one hand, I know very little about your past or what you are capable of. On the other, I have seen how you act, how consistent you are with it, and I know Elina could and would kick your ass if you tried anything. You'd also have most of the more powerful crew lined up behind her.

Yuan: Meaning...?

Ivy: You're smart enough to know that hurting her is a death warrant. Elina is madly in love with you, so next time...just go with it. Enough with the gentlemanly 'keep her at arms length' bit. It's actually a bit cruel a this point.

Yuan: ...I see your point. I did not mean to cause her pain. Thank you.

Elina: IT'S ABOUT DAMN TIME! *TACKLE* *KISS*

Yuan: :eek: :embarrass
urial angel of death

01-07-07, 01:20 PM		Volrath: I would just like to point out that, I don't think that what Terra and Lisa do is all that crazy.

P/Y/R: True honey but we use animated rope trick.

Volrath: And?...

OOC: Cookie to the person who can tell me what rope trick does without looking it up.
urial angel of death

01-07-07, 01:38 PM		OOC: Is it just me or does Yuan remind anyone else of Hannibal when he's being helpful?

IC: Kerrith: :weep:

Myrr floats back up to the ship just in time to see his sister being defeated by Jarlot.

Jarlot: Ah ha!

Myrr: Congradulations mister you just beat a six year old girl.

Jarlot: Don't belittle me while I'm drunk! :mad:
Charles Phipps

01-07-07, 01:45 PM		OOC: Yes he does.

Lilly: :twitch:

Aline: At last! The jealousy is begun!

Lilly: ....

Aline: What do you feel like?

Lilly: Urge to smite....Rising.

Aline: Really?

Lilly: No Elina and gender bending brother make Lilly...

Aline: Go crazy?

Lilly: Don't mind if I do!

*pulls out +5 battle ax*
Charles Phipps

01-07-07, 01:57 PM		OOC: The following is not canon. Probably ;-)

Jarlot's Office

Jarlot: Sooooo you want to date my kinda granddaughter huh.

Yuan: Yes.

Jarlot: So what exactly is your profession?

Yuan: I'm a Handsome Prince.

Jarlot: Of what nation?

Yuan: The Nations I carve out of the human psyche with my bloody blade and a fist that rips the still beating hearts of my enemies from their chests

Jarlot: I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. What did you say?

Yuan: Oh sorry, I must have dozed off for a second.

Jarlot: Can you tell me about your parents?

Yuan: Well I was born in a laboratory to Professor Merrix D'Cannith and his wife. He performed countless experiments on me growing up. On my fourteenth birthday, he revealed that I was actually the child of the Ancient Giants of whom the only survivor was the glorious giantess Achika who lived in a tube of mana fluid in the laboratory.

Jarlot: Uh huh.

Yuan: Then I joined House Denith and became a W.A.R.R.I.O.R. Cleaving entire masses of enemies to the Twelve Dragonmarked Houses with my Unholy Avenger Masamune Vorpal Blade +5.

Jarlot: That pay well?

Yuan: Decent wages. I supplement my income by having my DNA used to create Clones that go around menacing spikey haired soldiers and attempting to activate ancient eldritch machines.

Jarlot: Hmmm mmm. Do you like music?

Yuan: Yes, Japanese video game music and choir chanting orchestra.

Jarlot: Do you have a Dragonmark?

Yuan: Yes, but as a Half-Elf/Half-Godlike being it's the Aerenal Symbol of Death.

Jarlot: It says here you're sixteen years old, what did you do for the past two years anyway?

Yuan: Noticing the Continent of Sarlona was lacking Inspired leadership since they were slaughtered, I mostly spent my time conquering it. I eventually hope to find the mythical Valley of Power where I can crack open a hole in the Earth to absorb all the Dragon Line energy to make me into a god.

Jarlot: So you'd say the environment is chief of your concerns?

Yuan: I'd probably state that I'll do anything to protect the environment Hopefully by destroying the filthy humans that destroy it..

Jarlot: That last line?

Yuan: I said I want world peace.

Jarlot: Are you chaste?

Yuan: I believe in marriage before sex though I will impale red headed flower girls in lakes.

Jarlot: Huh, that's how I met my wife. I pass my approval onto you Yuna.

***

On Deck

Ivy: So how did the interview go?

Yuan: Strange, I don't remember any of it.
Crystalforged

01-07-07, 02:01 PM		Silver: Or you could become a conesseur, such like myself.

Bunny: With the exception of Ketler, no one on this ship would take you up on that suggestion. No one is that crazy.
Kanatash: :whatsthis Indeed? I had no idea. I will have to keep that in mind as I'm destroying all that is, all that was, and all that ever will be just so I can hear the sound it makes when all of it fades into oblivion.
rampant

01-07-07, 03:22 PM		Bunny - Replace crazy with stupid.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-07-07, 05:13 PM		Yuan: Ummm...I understand your caution, but is this really necessary?

Terra: Yes. Yes it is.

Yuan is strapped into a strange machine. Momo is busy tinkering with it, putting on the last few touches.

Lisa: Now, we're going to ask you some questions. We know magic and psionics are unreliable in your case, so this machine will tell us if you're lying.

Yuan: Fair enough. I understand. But would you be so kind as to remove the young lad from my ankle?

Scias: *chew* *munch*

Terra: *picks him up* C'mon, you. That's enough.

Scias: R-r-r-r-r..............rats.

Lisa: What is your name?

Yuan: Yuan Kulanni.

Lisa: Age?

Yuan: Sixteen.

Lisa: Profession?

Yuan: Guardian.

Terra: So far so good. Time for more involved questions.

Lisa: What are y-

Nina: *showing off her new dress* :D Am I pretty?

Lisa: Nina! It's rude to interrupt.

Nina: :( But I wanna know...

Yuan: *chuckles* Yes, young lady. You are very pretty.

Nina: Mom?

Terra: *sigh* He's telling the truth.

Nina: YAY! *runs off*

Lisa: Ok, back on track. What are your plans in this relationship?

Yuan: I will follow my Lady's...Elina's...wishes. I am still unsure I am fit for this role, but so long as she desires my company, I will oblige. Though I will follow her lead on how fast things go, I promise that I will not allow things to advance beyond what is best for her.

Lisa: If she desired to sleep with you, would that be in her best interest?

Yuan: No, ma'am. I know that Elina's mind is mostly mature, but to do such a thing before her body has caught up would be unforgivable.

Lisa: Hon?

Terra: ...this kid is either an incredible liar, to the point where even he believes it, or he's telling the truth. Are you sure there's no problems?

Momo: I tested it on Deis first. That's how I figured out why the cookies were gone. She even rolled a natural 20 on her bluff check.

Lisa: To what does this unforgiveability extend?

Yuan: Anything further than what, in somewhat cruder terms, is referred to as 'First Base'.

-----

Silver: :banghead: DAMMIT!! :tantrum:

-----

*after letting him out*

Terra: For now, young man, you have our trust. Be careful you do not lose it.

Yuan: I shall do my best.
DungeonJman

01-07-07, 05:16 PM		If the first one was canon then... excuse me for a moment.

(i.h.h we see the good side being chained down, with the lawful and evil sides holding him back)

Good: Let me out of here, i must stop evil!!!

Evil: Oh no you don't.

Lawful: We're not supposed to be helpful, so you're not taking over, you are staying right here.

Good: RAAAARGH!!!!!

*the two others pull harder*
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-07-07, 05:28 PM		Lisa: To what does this unforgiveability extend?

Yuan: Anything further than what, in somewhat cruder terms, is referred to as 'First Base'.
-----
Silver: :banghead: DAMMIT!! :tantrum:
OOcat: If I can't have respect, I'll settle for seeing you suffer. *Nelson laugh*

Silver takes out a book and furiously scribbles in it.

OOcat: :confused: What are you doing?

Silver: Re-defining "First Base". As the god of :cloud9: it falls under my portfolio.

OOcat: (inside: Mustthinkfast.) Hey, here's a d20 advnaced-class PDF that says characters can gain mystical powers from a bondage lifestyle.

Silver: (book goes flying) WHERE?! :drool:

Bunny: That explains sooooooooooooooo much about the übercouples. :nonono:
Charles Phipps

01-07-07, 05:28 PM		Well, it's stepping on Kaizer_Ryu's plot.

On the other hand it's Final Fantasy so we know he won't be able to resist making it canon.

Kaizer_Ryu: I Can too!

The beautiful SHINNNYYYY canon.

Kaizer_Ryu: It is shiny...

Can he resist? Can he ignore the allure? Can he appreciate Yuan alone when he can have Yuaniroth?

Gregorian Choir: YUANIROTH!
Kaizer_Ryu

01-07-07, 05:38 PM		OOKaizer: No...must resist shiny...! The plot demands it!

Of course, there's nothing saying that Yuaniroth isn't the Dragon's lame attempt at creating a double to confuse Elina or something like that. He could even be his evil twin. Yuan, however, is staying insufferably good and polite.









For now, at least...

DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
rampant

01-07-07, 05:40 PM		Aerith, and Vladimire - POSER!
--------------------------------------------

Devon - duuuuuu- ow! A fragging tamato!

Kithle - Correction: miniature killer tomato ranger with favored enemy bard

Devon hate you!
------------------------------------------

Satnak - I love'em to death but it is good to have the kids old enough they can go on deck alone. Its been too long since we got to use the couch.

Serene - Shut up and kiss me.
DungeonJman

01-07-07, 05:47 PM		Meh, well since no one noticed it up until this point, i'd better get that book from the time warp out of here. I only wish i knew how. *looks in the book* Maybe there's a martial manuver for that.
urial angel of death

01-07-07, 05:56 PM		Gregory walks into the room and sees Yuan strapped to the machine.

Gregory: I hope I'm no interrupting something. i just wanted to remind my teacher that we are to attend a graduation ceramony at Flame Keep, in one week.

Lisa: Thank you Gregory, I had completely forgotten.

Gregory: No, thank you for helping me become a scion of the faith.
DungeonJman

01-07-07, 06:11 PM		*after flipping through the book*

Ah here it is... wait a minute, that is the stupidest name for a martial manuver ever! You think that Corre would've changed it when she put that thing in this book, or will, considering that this book's from the future!

Oops.
urial angel of death

01-07-07, 06:17 PM		OOC: Kaizer will Yuan ever whip out a double bladed sword and lightning magic?
Kaizer_Ryu

01-07-07, 06:37 PM		Honestly, I can't say. But not right now or any time in the near future.
urial angel of death

01-07-07, 06:45 PM		OOC: Jeez I wasn't being serious. I was merely commenting on the fact that he had the same name as a Tales of Symphonia character.
Charles Phipps

01-07-07, 06:51 PM		OOC: On this thread, anything is serious.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-07-07, 06:59 PM		I thought you wanted to do something. :embarrass

But yes, Yuan's name is inspired by the bad-guy-who-is-not-really-a-bad-guy Yuan from ToS.
Charles Phipps

01-07-07, 07:03 PM		Yuaniroth: Yes, my evil schemes continue unabated.

Yuan: But I really am not evil!

Yuaniroth: Oh please, no one's buying that! GIVE INTO THE DARK SIDE!

Yuan: You mean...TWO cookies with morning tea?

Lilly: HOW DARE YOU SLEEP IN A BED WHEN ROCK IS GOOD THERE!

Miko: HAIL PALADINPALAZZO!
urial angel of death

01-07-07, 07:05 PM		I thought you wanted to do something. :embarrass

But yes, Yuan's name is inspired by the bad-guy-who-is-not-really-a-bad-guy Yuan from ToS.

Does that mean that this Yuna is a good-guy-who-is-not-really-a-good-guy?

Ya, ya I know it'll be a RAFO
Charles Phipps

01-07-07, 07:09 PM		Yuan: Why the hell would I be anything evil? Can't a man be good and noble on a ship like the Forgotten Freedom?

Everyone: NO!
DungeonJman

01-07-07, 07:17 PM		I don't know, i don't really believe that he's all that bad.

OOPhipps: Well, you normally have a stupidly large sense of morality and you don't live on the FF 24/7. That probably explains it.
Charles Phipps

01-07-07, 07:22 PM		fun filled fact....

The Forgotten Freedom's original owner was a gambler that knew Terra quite well.

Then Jarlot killed him.
DungeonJman

01-07-07, 07:30 PM		Reminds me, whatever happened to Slip?
Charles Phipps

01-07-07, 07:37 PM		Characters that are no longer serving on the Forgotten Freedom....

Jacob Hunter: Left the ship in disgust to pursue them as a force of JUSTICE.

Bruce Ki: Killed in Action fighting Arijani.

The Dragon Hunter: Yes, poor fellow retired for the great Dragon hunting with a stick in the sky. Crikey.

Doog Sr: Killed by Mordain Fleshweaver and then his corpse was added to Andrea's zombie servant collection.

Ishmael Sr: Liquidated for his unholy Jaela lust.

Slip: Returned to the Elven Empire. We stole a Spelljammer from her.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-07-07, 07:54 PM		Bruce Ki: Killed in Action fighting Arijani.
OOC: Wait, wasn't that before I did that whole thing where he got his voice back in sinc with his lips, found out he had an Australian accent, and got invited to teach at that Monty Python Australian university?
The Dragon Hunter: Yes, poor fellow retired for the great Dragon hunting with a stick. Crikey.
Bunny: Who the hell? I don't remember killing anyone by that name.
Slip: Returned to the Elven Empire. We stole a Spelljammer from her.
Caralot: Well, in reality she got a better offer from my father: he acknowledges she exists.
DungeonJman

01-07-07, 08:01 PM		Anyway, since no one's noticed. Begins to perform the martial stances and suddenly stops.

What, no one questioning anything i said in an attempt to make my life miserable, I'M ON TO YOU PEOPLE.

*meanwhile*

Kithle: It's fun to make people paranoid. :D
Kaizer_Ryu

01-07-07, 08:04 PM		Bunny: Who the hell? I don't remember killing anyone by that name.
Klaz, our very own Steve Irwin analogue and the only reason Vrin ever got any screen time.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-07-07, 08:06 PM		Klaz, our very own Steve Irwin analogue and the only reason Vrin ever got any screen time.
Bunny: That was the Dinosaur Hunter. I'm honestly surprised that you think I'd forget the name of someone I killed.

OOcat: What, you do it all the time.

Bunny: :mad: You want to know why you don't get any respect?!
DungeonJman

01-07-07, 08:08 PM		Klaz: *weakly, in Not-Dead Fred voice* I'm not dead yet.

*bunny repeatedly hits him with a hammer over the head and uses concentrated essence of Chuck Norris's roundhouse kick on him*

Bunny: NOW YOU ARE!!! For the love of Terra, he just keeps coming back!
rampant

01-07-07, 08:11 PM		Klaz - I'M NOT :censored:ING DEAD!

Vrin - Let me fix that!
-------------------------------------------

Sarah - Hey Tirmek!

Tirmek - Hey Sarah.

Sarah - There's a big party or something going down at the island in a few days.

Tirmek - I know, its great isn't it?

Sarah - (i.h.h. geeze he's picked it up quick)

Tirmek - All the labs are open:D !

Sarah - (i.h.h. or not :( )
DungeonJman

01-07-07, 08:14 PM		*finishes the martial stance and throws the book into the time portal*

Hey, something went right for once, with no problems!

*gets covered in lime green paint*

CHAAAAAAAALKY!!!!

*Spammar appears*

Spammar: I have come, because of your frequent posting!

Yes, but it wasn't actually in the guise of what is normally considering spamming, so your presence here is a mistake and illogical, and therefore, you are anethma to yourself.

*Spammar explodes*

Primus: Very nice logical mind gaming, couldn't have done better myself.

Wait, Primus? :confused: How'd you get here? Plus, wouldn't you die from the inherent chaoticness of the ship.

Primus: No, i just can't forcibly make people lawful.

Oh wait, i just realized what must be happening to my personality

(i.h.h)

Evil and Good: Gah! Primus makes him stronger, because he's essentially the embodyment of law.

Lawful Side: Ooooooooooh. Now i might be able to force both of you guys down and set up strict regimented order in here.
luna18moon

01-07-07, 08:34 PM		OOC: Finally... caught up... must stop forgetting to read.
Why are Slaypaw's kittens becoming sidekicks?
IC:
Mittens and Nashvir are standing in front of a door in the middle of a room. No room, just a door.
Nashvir: Are you sure you can get us there?
Mittens: :bored: Do you really think I would be doing this if I wasn't sure?
Nashvir: Sorry, I'm just nervous.
Mittens: *nuzzle* Don't be. It's wonderful.
She nudges the door open and leads Nashvir inside.
Rip, Tear and Shred are sitting up on a dark ledge.
Shred: Did you guys pick up where they were going?
Rip: Yes, but
Tear: we don't
Rip: want to go there.
Shred: :confused: Where'd they go?
Both: *shivering* The Extraplanar Dance.
Shred::doh: Great. You can't survive there without a date.
*Flashback*
Siamese cat: *purrs* Hello, hot stuff.
Shred: RUN AWAY!!!!
*End flashback*
Shred: No way we're going back there.
At the Extraplanar Dance, slow music is being played.
Nashvir: ;) May I have this dance?
Mittens: Of course. :cloud9:
As they are dancing, many hisses of jealousy can be heard.

OOC: Just to clarify, this is the FELINE Extraplanar Dance, which goes on for eternity.
Charles Phipps

01-07-07, 09:17 PM		Yes, Klaz can never die.

....horribly horribly beaten? Yes. Die? No.
Phantomcrossing

01-07-07, 09:20 PM		*whistle* wow, so that's what happened to everyone....what about Wang and Hoybee.
rampant

01-07-07, 09:40 PM		Vrin - :weep: I wanted to kill him.

Klaz - There there now bloke, now you can rain horrible torment upon for the rest of eternity

Vrin - *sniff* I feel better.

Klaz - I need to learn to keep me big yap shut!
---------------------------------------------------------

Sarah - About the party-

Tirmek - I'm reserving one of the A-class labs, they're always busy.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-07-07, 10:01 PM		Sarah: They're gonna be playing some of my favorite songs...

Tirmek: Oh, background music! Always great to work with.

Sarah: I have these wonderful new outfits...

Tirmek: Probably not a good idea in the lab.

Sarah: I'm having Auntie Serene teach me a few things...

Tirmek: Huh... I guess that makes sense considering her father does a bit of lab work himself. Maybe I should go too.

Sarah: :( *sigh*
rampant

01-07-07, 10:07 PM		13 - I wonder how long till they realize bunny already took care of this joke.

Bunny - I still have its fossilized remains somewhere.

Silver - :tantrum: STOP BEING DENSE!
Charles Phipps

01-07-07, 10:31 PM		Sarah: Only so far as until something unexpected occurs.

Later

Tirmek: Sarah, I think we need to...GASP!

*Ivy the male in bed with Sarah*

Sarah: It's not what you think!

Ivy: OH WOE! What a tangled web I've woven with my Bardic lust and charms!
rampant

01-07-07, 11:25 PM		Tirmek - ...twitch

Sarah - I think he's broke

Ivy - You could always join us:D

Sarah - Its not like that Tirmek honest!

Tirmek moves quietly up to the bed

Sarah - Seriously its not what you think

Ivy - Don't lie to him hun, his sense motive check looks like an address.

Tirmek proceeds to strangle Ivy

Ivy - Gaaahaahhahag

Sarah - :nonono: You're doing it all wrong, (shoves Tirmek aside) like this, use the thumbs.

Ivy - gahhhh-
Paulon

01-08-07, 12:13 AM		Fela notices the disturbance and looks around. She spots 13 grinning wide enough to unzip the top of the nonexistant critter's head, but no current sign of Bunny or Silver, who would be better clues to prior events. Though on her consideration, the Bunny's current lack is more a clue for future events, like previously discounted possibility of Ivy's survival...
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-08-07, 08:26 AM		Silver quietly creeps up behind Tirmek. Since she's non-existant there's no way to detect her. She carefully searches the back of his head for a special flap, then pulls it up to reveal a controll board.

13: I would have thought you'd have remote controls.

Silver: I've been pressing the "Hint" button all day, and it's not working.

13: So now what?

Silver (taking out a large cattle prod): A "tap" from the wand of motivation………………:evillaugh
rampant

01-08-07, 12:44 PM		Tirmek - huh?

Silver - Ok the subtle approach is not going to work here *puts down cattle prod* *picks up thermonuclear detonator*
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-08-07, 02:03 PM		Silver - Ok the subtle approach is not going to work here *puts down cattle prod* *picks up thermonuclear detonator*
OOC: You win the :mage: award for best overuse of power.
Phantomcrossing

01-08-07, 06:53 PM		(thermonuclear detonator, weak!)

In Pholly's lab.

Norbaz: Hey, Pholly.

Small explosion.

Pholly: Ouch...yes?

Norbaz: I need some help making a special combustible.

Pholly: Really? With what.

The half giant hefts a pot of chili onto the table.


DRAMATIC MUSIC.
urial angel of death

01-08-07, 07:07 PM		OOC: Kaizer do you still have plans for Miko, or is she as third-party publishers say open content? If you say yes I promise not to drool as much as WW did when it was handed the Ravenloft priviledges.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-08-07, 07:15 PM		(thermonuclear detonator, weak!)

In Pholly's lab.

Norbaz: Hey, Pholly.

Small explosion.

Pholly: Ouch...yes?

Norbaz: I need some help making a special combustible.

Pholly: Really? With what.

The half giant hefts a pot of chili onto the table.


DRAMATIC MUSIC.


Ash "Im suddenly hungry and I dont know why."
Endless_Helix

01-08-07, 07:16 PM		Characters that are no longer serving on the Forgotten Freedom....

Ishmael Sr: Liquidated for his unholy Jaela lust.


Actually, Ishmael Sr first died because of his encounter with a massive, dying beast's stomach after saving Sakura (recently recongized as one of the many Jaelas.). Then he died again after Ketler accidently restarted Ishy's nervousystem with a lightning bolt in Volrath's Lab. His structural integrity failed as he was at this point in time a half-digested seven limbed pseudopod. However, he did give his son, Ishmael Jr. his journal before collapsing into a puddle of stomach acid and protoplasm.
rampant

01-08-07, 07:28 PM		Sarah - (i.h.h. I wonder) Hey Tirmek! I wanna see that school girl number again.

Tirmek - Ok *drops Ivy's near lifeless form*

Sarah - Next time we'll use our claws bard boy.
---------------------------------------------------

Tirmek (girl) - I just don't get it.

Sarah - You don't have to. Now why are you being so dense about the party.

Tirmek - :confused: You act like you... ...oh..your..mom! You want to go to the party!?

Sarah - I KNEW GIRL YOU WOULD CATCH ON!
Charles Phipps

01-08-07, 08:16 PM		Ivy: Yes, Tirmek, she's had me shapechanging into you.

Tirmek: WHAT!?

Ivy: Yes.

*Shapeshifts into Tirmek*

Sarah: It's true. I need someone to....snog.

Tirmek: You could have just told me!

*Sound of Silver slapping herself*

Ivy: Yes, I'm not proud of it but her lips touched yours!

Tirmek:.....ew.

Ivy: Now you can make Sarah's every fantasy come true!

Sarah: Tirmek, could you become older Ivy?
Kaizer_Ryu

01-08-07, 08:27 PM		OOC: Kaizer do you still have plans for Miko, or is she as third-party publishers say open content? If you say yes I promise not to drool as much as WW did when it was handed the Ravenloft priviledges.
OOC: I don't have anything specific, but she's Charles' character. I'm pretty sure she's gonna come up at some point during this love dodecahedron. :D

IC:

Lilly: :twitch: He's up to something, I know it!

Aline: Much jealously I sense in you.

Lilly: It's just not normal to be that smooth!

Flashback

Elina: C'mon! You've gotta see Sharn from the air!

Yuan: *being dragged faster than he can run* Y-yes, my Lad-...er, Elina...

As they move, darts, trap doors, poison gas, and all manner of other traps spring on Yuan, but due to Elina's speed he's gone before they have any effect.

End Flashback

Aline: I'm pretty sure he had nothing to do with that.

Lilly: :twitch: Oh, that's just what he want's you to think!

Flashback

Yuan: Hmm? What's this?

As he leans over, a vorpal battle axe sails past where his neck would have been.

Yuan: Oh, dear. It seems Lilly has dropped his coin pouch.

End Flashback

Lilly: :twitch: And then he gave it back to me! AFTER PUTTING MORE GOLD IN IT!

Aline: Just admit it. He's actually a really nice guy.

Lilly: :twitch: What about that time he tried to kill me?!

Flashback

Yuan: *bows slightly as he walks by* Good evening, Lilly.

Lilly: :twitch: *points* I'M ON TO YOU!

End Flashback

Aline: :nonono: You need help.

Lilly: :twitch: *holding an Elina doll, whispering* You believe me, don't you? *listens* What's that? My socks are out to kill me? Well we can't have that, can we?

Aline backs away quickly as Lilly pulls out a wand of Fireballs and aims it at his feet.
Charles Phipps

01-08-07, 08:47 PM		OOC: Go for it urial.

Kaizer also wins an :evillaugh award for torturing Lilly in that scene.

I'm sure he'll get more for Elina torture and already has one retroactively for the Kitsune debacle.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-08-07, 09:10 PM		OOC: Heck, he wins a :crazy: . Not as good as a :looloo:, but then I had to raise my standards.

OOcat: Heck, you'd give that to anyone who made you laugh if the rest of us didn't stop you.

OOC: Stop transferring your feelings of low value onto me. :mad:
Kaizer_Ryu

01-08-07, 09:33 PM		OOKazier: :w00t: Two awards for one post, and another one added retroactively! That's a new record for me. What to do next... :plotting:

OOCharles: :ahem: Aren't you supposed to be doing something?

OOKaizer: I'm still thinking. I can't pull A material out of the air all the time. :D

OOCharles: :waits: No. The other thing.

OOKaizer: :thinks: :confused:

OOCharles: :twitch:

OOKaizer: Just kidding. :P

OOCharles: :mad: Ok, where's Elina? I'm telling her about what you're going to do to her if you don't get moving.

OOKaizer: :eek: Yes sir! *runs*

OOCharles: :emp:

OOC: For those of you completely confused, I'm reviewing an as-of-yet unreleased novel for/written by Charles, and I keep getting distracted. :embarrass
Charles Phipps

01-08-07, 09:40 PM		*cracks whip*

:-)

IC:

Elina: Hey Lilly.

Lilly: Elina! Aren't you hating me?

Elina: Well Yuan told me to forgive you.

Lilly: DON'T BELIEVE A WORD HE'S SAYING!

Elina: Huh?

Lilly: If he's saying to forgive me then it's part of some evil and dastardly plot that I'm in on!

Elina: Lilly, are you smoking the dreamlilly?

Lilly: It clears my head to understand the brilliant criminal mind of Yuan!

Yuan: And that gregory is how to be a Paladin!

Gregory: Thank you Yuan! I now know the true spirit of Tira Mirron's teachings!

Lilly: So the Flame is in on it too huh?
DungeonJman

01-08-07, 10:04 PM		Kithle, what did you do to Lilly?

Kithle: What do you mean?

Oh come on! Everyone knows that as part of your award you have to make people paranoid.

Kithle: Oh, i didn't do anything, he made himself paranoid. It's pretty fun to watch, though.

And the book thing?

Kithle: That i admit was me.

*walks away* So many crazy and disturbing things, urge to smite rising... NO! Stupid Lawful side is getting stronger again. Must relax, must go to happy place *surrounds himself with his 18 or so D&D books* ahhh, much better.
rampant

01-08-07, 11:02 PM		Sarah - So are you gonna ask me or what?:D

Tirmek - Ok you want to go out ask me, don't play these games. If I was gonna ask you out I'd aim for something we'd both enjoy.

Sarah - You thought i'd enjoy spending the night in a lab?

Tirmek - I never asked you to come.

Sarah - Geeze! I thought you liked me!

Tirmek - I do!

Sarah - Then why don't you just ask me out.

Tirmek - I was going to!

Sarah - So lets go to the party.

Tirmek - Why are you so hell bent on torturing me like that!
Kaizer_Ryu

01-08-07, 11:22 PM		Sarah puts her hands on her hips and gives him a half-upset, half-confused, and half-concerned look. (yes, I know that's three halves. Chaos magic)

Sarah: Is this about the other student's less than enlightened behavior towards you? You let me more or less dress you in drag! And then you happily walk around in it! Is there something else going on, or is the contempt of a bunch of idiots who judge before knowing too much?
rampant

01-08-07, 11:30 PM		Tirmek - *sigh* Part of its that, there's a big difference between "invited" and "welcome".

Sarah - The other part?

Tirmek - Think about from my view, There is nothing for me at most parties, I can't have cake, ice cream, punch, any sort of concentrated processed sugar. Between that and the whole Rakshasa thing, and that's not even mentioning the Clanspeople like Reser who despise me for being rogue clan, or the ones who have issues with me for having any ties to the clan.

Sarah - I thought the island was a refuge.

Tirmek - It is! its the only place on that world where i can walk around in broad daylight! But it doesn't mean I'm welcome at Vedris's little shin-digs.
Charles Phipps

01-08-07, 11:38 PM		*pops in*

Rose: Obviously you need MY help! And ORCUS!

:coolcthul: HEY!

Rose: Yes, not Cthulhu, surprising I know.
Phantomcrossing

01-08-07, 11:38 PM		A crow face peeks into Pholly's lab as the gnome on a tall stool and the half-giant loom over vials, burners, and other alchemical and cooking equipment.

Ash: What is that heavenly aroma, and why does it make me think that there will be delightful explosions and fanfare following these works.

Norbaz: We're making the new catapult rounds.

Pholly: It should be more volatile than a ten gallon clay jar of alchemist fire.

Norbaz: And capable of so much more in a quarter of the volume.
ratslinky

01-08-07, 11:38 PM		Gaz: So Norbaz what do you think?

Norbaz: It's an interesting idea could be helpful with other things as well

Gaz: Thanks I think Tirmek really needs a break on that stuff I mean I can help with the rest of the stuff but i'll need you for this
Phantomcrossing

01-08-07, 11:48 PM		Norbaz: Just say the word Gaz and give me the particulars.
rampant

01-08-07, 11:54 PM		Tirmek - And its not Drag if I'm a girl at the time.
Crystalforged

01-09-07, 12:05 AM		A crow face peeks into Pholly's lab as the gnome on a tall stool and the half-giant loom over vials, burners, and other alchemical and cooking equipment.

Ash: What is that heavenly aroma, and why does it make me think that there will be delightful explosions and fanfare following these works.

Norbaz: We're making the new catapult rounds.

Pholly: It should be more volatile than a ten gallon clay jar of alchemist fire.

Norbaz: And capable of so much more in a quarter of the volume.
OOCrystalforged: Personally I've always though a good weapon would be Pholly, strapped to a balista bolt and aimed at something liquid on the enemy vessly. :thinks: ...I wonder how hard it would be to put the returning enchantment on a gnome?
DungeonJman

01-09-07, 12:21 AM		You can't. You could, theoretically, duct tape him to an explosion proof returning spear and throw that at the enemy, and he'd come back with it.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-09-07, 12:24 AM		OOC: This is the Forgotten Freedom. "Can't be done' is merely a euphamism for 'We haven't gotten around to it yet'. :D

IC:

Sarah: :rolleyes: That's why I put in the qualifier. It's just amusing that you're perfectly ok being pretty even though you're naturally male.

Tirmek: :embarrass Shapeshifting requires a bit of openmindedness about gender roles. And it's not just superficial overall. There are subtle differences in brain structure and hormone function.

Sarah: Thus explaining the natural blockheadedness in males. ;)

Tirmek: Yeah, yeah, I know I should have caught your hints. You're going to get some milage out of that, aren't you?

Sarah: :D You know it. But I'm sorry for not seeing your point of view. I guess I should thank you for coming along to the other parties over the years, even though you're left out of most of it.

Tirmek: Well...it's not like I didn't have any fun. This just has the added element of not being welcome by most of the guests.

Sarah: Ok, then. The party's out. But I'm still waiting for you to ask me...
Crystalforged

01-09-07, 12:26 AM		You can't. You could, theoretically, duct tape him to an explosion proof returning spear and throw that at the enemy, and he'd come back with it.
OOCrystalforged: Can't? No offense but this is the FF we're talking about here. We crossed out of the realm of the improbable and into the flat out impossible a loooooooooooooong time ago.

:shifty: Truth be told though it would be more practical to have him return with the balista bolt. Saves time reloading.

:smirk: Its not as funny that way though.
rampant

01-09-07, 12:45 AM		Tirmek - The night after Vedris's party there is a massive Stellar Conjunction.

Sarah - Stellar right? not lunar?

Tirmek - No, don't worry. Anyway Vedris throws some real wild suares (spell check). Most people need to spend the next night recovering or at least catching up on homework. With most of the nightowls down we can snag a prime spot over Kahuna Drop.

Sarah - ...

Tirmek - :rolleyes: fine!.. *ahem* Would you like to watch the once in an age conjunction of the Tome and Eye constellations over Kahuna Drop with me?
Kaizer_Ryu

01-09-07, 12:59 AM		Sarah: :D Of course I would! See? Was that so hard? ;)
rampant

01-09-07, 01:13 AM		Tirmek - Now how do we keep your family from skinning me alive?
--------------------------------------

Lisa - Dear?

Terra - I don't know babe all I know Is I have the strangest urge to polish this thing (gives the shotgun in her lap a strange look)

Lisa - Could it have anything to do with the skinning knives I saw being sharpened earlier today?

Terra - I thought I told Momo and Scias to put those up.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-09-07, 01:39 AM		Sarah: Well, they've already given me "the talk". They both like you, so that works in our favor. But then there's the parental instinct, which may kick in to varying degrees. They both recognize that our bodies are behind our minds, and they worry about me going too fast. Then again, they may trust us to make responsible decisions...

Tirmek: Your measuring the odds of success isn't terribly reassuring.

Sarah: *anime sweatdrop* Eh heh heh... The biggest sticking point is if we can convince them that we won't be doing anything...inappropriate. If we fail, we may end up with a chaperone if they even let us go at all.

Tirmek: The idea of either of your parents or my mother staring at us the whole time gives me the shivers.

Sarah: *shudder* Don't I know it. We have scary parents. And a scary aunt.

Tirmek: *face palm* I forgot about that... Are you sure this is such a great idea? We may not live to see another day.

Sarah: :( Oh, come on! Don't back out on me now! Just because we're surrounded by over-protective and intensely scary adults doesn't mean we can't have a good time...right?

Tirmek: Suddenly that party doesn't look so bad...
rampant

01-09-07, 01:48 AM		Sarah - You are not gonna project out of here on me now!

Tirmek - I'm not projecting, I'm re-arranging melds, and clearing my mind for power use.

Sarah - Please tell me that your not as stupid as this sounds.

Tirmek - I need the cutesiest dress you can find...And see if you can't help me pick out something a little more manly to use on my mother, the plan that I have for your's wont work with her.
urial angel of death

01-09-07, 08:57 AM		Volrath: Don't worry you already have a chaperone :D
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-09-07, 09:03 AM		Bunny: I could chaperone.

Tirmek: Huh? You?

Bunny: I like you guys. You're efficient killers. Plus there's this whole "if they underestimate the kids, they deserve to die" sort of thing going on.

Sarah: Are you sure that would work?

Bunny: If Silver tries anything I'm one of the few entities that can affect her.

13: Essentially nothing would happen.

Bunny: 13 can assist me, since it annoys Silver.

Trimek: You three have a very weird relationship.

Sarah: I still don't know. Are there any other advantages?

Bunny: Being non-existant, you'd never notice I'm there.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-09-07, 09:13 AM		Sarah: Somehow I doubt Mom considers you to be a qualified chaperone, Uncle.

Tirmek: *slightly sarcastic* Odd as it may seem, I think that having a god of Death and a god of Making People's Lives Miserable as chaperones isn't the best idea in the world. Especially since neither of you are allowed to do anything useful.

Sarah: Can we see if this'll work without chaperones before going through the multitudes of people who could ruin our first date in any number of ways? :(
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-09-07, 09:19 AM		Tirmek: *slightly sarcastic* Odd as it may seem, I think that having a god of Death and a god of Making People's Lives Miserable as chaperones isn't the best idea in the world. Especially since neither of you are allowed to do anything useful.
Bunny: There's more to it than being able to whack Silver when she gets feisty? :confused:
Sarah: Can we see if this'll work without chaperones before going through the multitudes of people who could ruin our first date in any number of ways? :(
13: No. :devil:

Bunny: Okay, maybe Tirmek has a point. :bored:
Charles Phipps

01-09-07, 10:24 AM		Aerith: Well I'm also coming! I'm the representative of the Plane of Law. But I'm allowed to bring a couple of guests as entourage.

Lilly: Yo!

Tirmek: Oh hell no!

Lilly: Don't worry, there's a person I hate more in the universe now.

Yuan: I'm going to go to persuade the Rakashasas to give up evil.

Tirmek: Ivy?

Yuan: Oh no, I'm Yuan.

Tirmek: But you look exactly l....nevermind.

Ivy: I'm a pretty pretty girl!

Tirmek:....nevermind in triplicate.
rampant

01-09-07, 11:30 AM		[b]Yuan: I'm going to go to persuade the Rakashasas to give up evil.

Tirmek - :bored: ...

Yuan - ok bad example

Maladren - ... *spins a knife around her knuckles*

Yuan - My self preservation instincts just kicked in.
----------------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Seriously Sarah, Lets loose these killjoys, You get the dress and we meet at your place. Go! *shadow body*

Sarah - *shadow form*
Lord Kale Fangblade

01-09-07, 03:23 PM		Sithis Dreamt,
It was nighttime, and a figure flitted through the shadows. the night was silent as was the figure. the figure cotinued through the castle grounds until it reached its wall. then it simply crawled up the wall. its movements silent as the it crept upto a window. it removed the black glove from its left hand revealing the rune on its palm. it raised the hand above the window ledge and as if it had eyes there moved the hands gaze from left to right.
inside the room a bed chamber was revealed, the finery within was exquisite and only the moonlight the filtered in from the window panes lit the room.
lay upon the bed was a sleeping woman, the figure licked its lips sending its tongue dancing across its fanges.

the figures hunger increased tenfold. it was sooooooo hungry.... the warmth... the taste and texture of the blood. it desired nothing more. the figure stood its feet still connected to the tower and walked up until it stood on the ledge facing the window pane. then it stepped forwards passing through the glass as if it was nothing more than shadow.
the figure ghosted across to the bed and crouched its head hanging above the sleeping womans neck in anticipation. its hand clasped around her mouth as it bit in. it revled in the sensations of life force and blood passing into it, it drank more and more. until only a lifeless husk remained. it stood up its face appearing in the moonlight. the once gaunt features filled out. the withers of age vanished. and now Sithis could see it was him.

Sithis awoke panting. sweat clinging to him, the hunger screaming in his bones.
urial angel of death

01-09-07, 03:33 PM		Volrath: I am completely responsible.

Lenneth: Dad have you fed the Shoggoth this week? It's trying to get out!

Volrath: Point taken god of irony, but even so I would blend in and I wouldn't let anything bad happen to Sarah.
volrathxp

01-09-07, 06:19 PM		wow.... it's lovely to see that the Forgotten Freedom hasn't become.... forgotten.

http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Erk

Yes! I love it! I never had the real time to keep up with Erk, it's awesome to see people liked him at least!

:) :) :)

If I have time I may come up with someone to join. :D
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-09-07, 06:45 PM		Ash "Right, weponised Incendenary chilli, check"

Norbaz *Hitting ash's hand with a spoon "If you leave any of it to be used"

Ash "Chilli Incendeanry weaponiser"

Norbaz "Check, why did I agree to this?"

Ash "Fame, a presatnack Chilli test, and Im more polite when I want fed. mad Alchemist"

Pholli "Im not mad"

Ash "You work here, denial is madness, check. Rule breaking wizard who think hes a pyro, here moastly for the groupies"

Nalfen "And to finaly prove Im better than you Bird man"

Ash "As the Quori said to the Klashitar, dream on. Arteficer suport and heavy artilery."

Liam "Here, I have enough weirsian gadgets to turn the place into a puddle of glass."

Ash "Team mascot"

Cole "Lets burn"

Ash "And my old Pyro buddy Aurixirthos. Ok, hold on tight and Lets go"

Nalfen "Wait, your taking us there?"

Ash "I asked Rose to alter corse, he seems to have a grudge"

Pholi "Timer for the fuel air explosaves set?"

Ash "Yep, relax Nalfen, I was an elocater long before I was a pyro, its not just the seting of things aflame, its the getting away afterwards." They link hands and Teleport.

(will post there actual arival soon, just tired, yes Im finaly getting to this)
rampant

01-09-07, 07:03 PM		Chalky - You leave without me and I eat all of you.

Ash - One trick pony, ... Check

Chalky - Enough booster to spread said puddle of glass over half the continent, .. check:D

Liam - Only half?

Chalky - You guys started leaving without me. I didn't have time for another trip.

Ash - How did you hijack this teleport?

Chalky - Meh, Nalfein's chock full of tracers and relays. The ubers use him to store anything too useless to have on hand, but too expensive to just toss.
rampant

01-09-07, 08:01 PM		Tirmek (girl form, in a dress with far too many cute little ruffles) - Please, can we go see the Stellar conjunction :bigeyes:

Terra - Gah!

Lisa - Cute attack!
Kaizer_Ryu

01-09-07, 08:27 PM		Tirmek: :rolleyes: (i.h.h.) This was not the reaction I had in mind...

Terra & Lisa: *snuggle* :cloud9: Kawaii... :cloud9:

Sarah: Can we? :bigeyes:

Terra: *snuggle* How long would you be there?

Lisa: *snuggle* What would you do?

Tirmek: Mmmph mmmrrh... *anime sweatdrop*

Sarah: Let up on the snuggling a bit, please.
rampant

01-09-07, 08:31 PM		Tirmek - AIR! *wheeze*

Sarah - Well the conjunction is at 11:32

Tirmek - Given My limited knowledge of practical Astronomy, I'd like to be there by at least 11:00.

Sarah - We were thinking picnic
Charles Phipps

01-09-07, 09:11 PM		You also get an Aerith :cloud9: award for the above post.
DungeonJman

01-09-07, 09:13 PM		OOC: Gonna be helping Dorvos with his bard training for a little bit.

*Dorvos is standing next to him taking notes*

And that is how to sing a Ballad, granted, it's more talking then it is singing, but it has to be done in a specific way or else it becomes uninteresting. In fact, the words can be really silly, but as long as the emphasis is placed in the right way, then it will be liked.

Hey, i'd like to meet the wizard developer that said that bards can't be lawful. What are the classical composers with lawful opinions? Experts?

Anyway...
Kaizer_Ryu

01-09-07, 09:20 PM		Terra: (link with Lisa) Picnic? Oh great.

Lisa: Now, hon. Just because we do that doesn't mean they will. It will be their first date, after all.

Terra: :rolleyes: They've practically been dating since they were eleven.

Lisa: Which also means the novelty of the situation will be somewhat less.

Terra: Still, we both know the power of those impulses...

Lisa: They won't be entirely alone. Besides, they're both intelligent kids verging on young adults.

Terra: The rational part of the the brain isn't what I'm worried about.

Lisa: I know, hon. But remember, we have to give Sarah some leeway. Show her we trust her judgement like we say we do.

Terra: *sigh* You're right, of course. I'm just not sure I'm ready for both our girls to start dating. At least Elina and Yuan have stayed within sight.

Lisa: :D You're just adorable when you fret like this. ;)

*outside*

Sarah & Tirmek: :bigeyes:

Terra: All right, all right. You can go. So long as it's ok with Ketty and you at least check in with either her or us by 2, ok?
urial angel of death

01-09-07, 09:28 PM		OOC: Kaizer you are being far more trusting than any real-life parent who acts like Terra or Lisa. That being their parenting technics not "that".
rampant

01-09-07, 09:31 PM		Tirmek - Now for the hard part.

Sarah - Oh come on

Tirmek - Seriously, my mother is scary!

Sarah - And mine isn't?

Tirmek - Not as scary

Sarah - She's not that bad what about Satnak?

Tirmek - Nice Aunt.

Sarah - hmmmmmm... Teiza!

Tirmek - *leaps up the mast* WHERE?!
----------------------------------------------

OOC: Was that award for me or kaizer?
Kaizer_Ryu

01-09-07, 09:47 PM		OOC: Kaizer you are being far more trusting than any real-life parent who acts like Terra or Lisa. That being their parenting technics not "that".
If the children haven't done anything wrong, what reason do the parents have not to give them the benefit of the doubt? Elina is a special case in that Kitsune was feeding her crap and they had no way of knowing. The Spirit Guide is only real to the Spirit Shaman, and the only way anyone else knows what was going on is if Elina told them. Much goes on off screen. I don't think lecturing is going to be very interesting for very long. The incident with Lilly was not taken lightly, but grounding her or something like that would not have served any purpose. There is a fine difference between "benefit of the doubt" and "trust", but it is very improtant.
DungeonJman

01-09-07, 10:08 PM		OOC: Well, you don't have to worry about trust because, contrary to everything else that i've done, i'm planning on a way to completely mess this up :D , if allowed (more like ruining the moment).
Kaizer_Ryu

01-09-07, 10:12 PM		Ruining the moment = extraordinary pain

Just a heads up. :P

And I do have something planned for after the date.
urial angel of death

01-09-07, 10:25 PM		If the children haven't done anything wrong, what reason do the parents have not to give them the benefit of the doubt? Elina is a special case in that Kitsune was feeding her crap and they had no way of knowing. The Spirit Guide is only real to the Spirit Shaman, and the only way anyone else knows what was going on is if Elina told them. Much goes on off screen. I don't think lecturing is going to be very interesting for very long. The incident with Lilly was not taken lightly, but grounding her or something like that would not have served any purpose. There is a fine difference between "benefit of the doubt" and "trust", but it is very improtant.

First off teens do not for the most part act rationally around the oppisite sex, and parents know this from their time at that age. For instance the reason most dads are hard on the guys their daughters date is because they know what they guy is thinking from being in his shoes. They want the guy's mind to be on other things like the dad's shotgun.

To put it another way do your parents ever give Rei the benefit of the doubt, on anything?
rampant

01-09-07, 10:38 PM		Tirmek - Actually I'm a little more worried about the Soulbound sword and the shadow powers, than the shotgun. Also Technically I'm not completely the opposite sex.

Sarah - That might actually make it worse. Something I've been meaning to ask you, if Rakshasa are shapeshifters, why are they so hung up on gender?

Tirmek - Part of it might be a reaction to the shapeshifting, the big thing is I've trained the shaeshifting and studied it. Most Rakshasa can only make external modifications. I've pushed it a little farther. Short story, I've improved on this ability by sacrificing the limited mind reading. I figured I already had plenty of telepathy abilities. (read: minmaxed) Now I need to change somewhere before we see mom.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-09-07, 10:46 PM		First off teens do not for the most part act rationally around the oppisite sex, and parents know this from their time at that age. For instance the reason most dads are hard on the guys their daughters date is because they know what they guy is thinking from being in his shoes. They want the guy's mind to be on other things like the dad's shotgun.

To put it another way do your parents ever give Rei the benefit of the doubt, on anything?
Both of them are well aware, as shown in previous conversations, that Terra, Lisa, Satnak, and Ketty are scary beyond all reason. The shotgun is a moot point, because it need not be reinforced.

Both Tirmek and Sarah are mentally well beyond teenager, being of mixed blood they only look that way. The hormones are still a problem, but they are far from thinking only with the lower brain.

And yes. Yes they do. Scary isn't it?
DungeonJman

01-09-07, 11:00 PM		Ruining the moment = extraordinary pain

Just a heads up. :P

And I do have something planned for after the date.

Pfft, i'm not worried about that, did you even see what happened to that avatar of Eberron that i whacked? And that's not even full power.

Kobold Clerics of Eberron (Clerics of the Iredar): *translated from Draconic* Ok, so we have the high priest, let him use his mightiest spells on the avatar of the Dragon in Between.

High Priest: *casts True Ressurection*

*Avatar remains dead*

KCOE: You idiot, you cast the spell wrong!

HP: No, but i did it exactly right!

*casts it again and the avatar is still dead*

All: Arrrgh!
rampant

01-09-07, 11:06 PM		Satnak - What kind of idiot leaves a body?

Andrea - The kind my bussiness relies on, Where's that scroll of create uberundead?
--------------------------------------------------------

Tirmek (guy) - Mother?

Ketty - Yes my son?

Tirmek - You are aware of the stellar conjunction in a couple days.

Ketty - Indeed

Tirmek - I was wondering if

Sarah - Oh for crying out loud! He's asked me to watch it with him over Kahuna Drop.

Ketty - Oh yea Terra was just telling me about that. I assume you'll be wanting to pack some of the Crineapple crisps Grammy Stonechewer sent.

Tirmek - You knew the whole time :twitch:

Ketty - I'm your mother.

Tirmek - EVIL!

Ketty - I'm your mother.
Paulon

01-09-07, 11:08 PM		OOPaulon: Aww. Poor liddle avatar. Poor liddle kobolds.
*waves his hand and resurrects the avatar to make everyone happy*
OOPaulon: All better now. :P

*notes that here's a difference between an EBNE's ability to affect characters of the world, even the Progenator Dragons themselves, and what they might manage to do to each other - such as removing annoying Paladin powers... :P *
DungeonJman

01-09-07, 11:08 PM		Actually, i forgot to mention, they're doing it on a pile of burnt ashes.

Hey! no ressurecting the avatar, you know what that does.

*Bunny begins chasing after Paulon*

Bunny: YOU..STOLE...THE KILL !!!!
rampant

01-09-07, 11:16 PM		OORampant - Don't make me seperate you two, I'll use The Moon Light to do it!
---------------------------------------------------------------------

Sarah - I didn't know she could give the evil eye around corners :gel:

Tirmek - Yours are doing it through the walls.

Sarah - We forgot a variable.

Tirmek - Never forget the siblings.
rampant

01-09-07, 11:57 PM		Dorvos - Hmmm

DungeonJ - Ok I guess we keep going *picks up guitern (ancestor to guitar)*

Many many hours later

DungeonJ - must .... stop.... fingers ....falling..... off.

Dorvos - Hmmmm

Mittens - meow *chomp* (keep teaching :censored: )
ratslinky

01-10-07, 01:59 AM		Gaz: Hey Tirmek I got some punch and cake for you and Sarah

Tirmek: *sigh* Gaz you know i can't have concentrated sugar

Gaz: I know thats why I got Norbaz to create a sugar substitute for you
rampant

01-10-07, 02:27 AM		Tirmek (at the railing) - *ralph*
---------------------------------------

Ralph - Howdy Bob

Bob - :OMG! Look out ralph!

Ralph - *looks up* :confused:

Bob - Not you I mean *splattered*...Nevermind
------------------------------------------------------

OOC: No offense Ratslinky, I just enjoy his suffering.

Lily - Does that mean you'll-

OORampant - I enjoy your suffering more.

Lily - i'm never gonna catch a break am I?

OORampant - Here's a net, good hunting.
ratslinky

01-10-07, 07:12 AM		Gaz: Ah well looks like it has some side effects. Have lollie

Tirmek: Gah
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-10-07, 07:56 AM		Hey, i'd like to meet the wizard developer that said that bards can't be lawful. What are the classical composers with lawful opinions? Experts?
OOcat: Then ignore the rule. :rolleyes: I mean, I completely agree that the entire system is frelled.

OOC: I'm supposed to be the one who talks shop. :mad:

OOcat: What? Ever since you abandoned D&D?
Terra: Still, we both know the power of those impulses...
13: You've met them firsthand.
Tirmek - EVIL!

Ketty - I'm your mother.
13: Did you think I worked only with kids? :devil:
OOC: No offense Ratslinky, I just enjoy his suffering.

Lily - Does that mean you'll-

OORampant - I enjoy your suffering more.

Lily - i'm never gonna catch a break am I?

OORampant - Here's a net, good hunting.
Squirrel Chorus: "Ooh it's baaaaaaaaaaaaaad luck to be youuuuuuuuuuuuu……"
Charles Phipps

01-10-07, 09:18 AM		Lilly: Man, this blows. Friday night and nothing to do.

Aline: We could snog.

Lilly: Okay.

Kerrith: I have a better idea!

Lilly:....uh huh.

Kerrith: LARPING!

Lilly:....hell no.

Kerrith: No! Behold! LIVE ACTION D&D MODULES!

Lilly: Aren't those a bit silly?

Kerrith: Nope! Not when you're allowed to use REAL WEAPONS!

Lilly: Your ideas intrigue me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

Kerrith: Basically, the expansion pack written by Jarlot will take us to a region of Eberron where we and other fellow warriors will use our pre-arranged tour to slaughter the resulting targets for fun and EXP.

Aline: Sounds great! How do you arrange it?

Kerrith: By pre-existing monstrous habits!

Lilly: I'm pretty high level, I don't want to do something silly like 'Descent into the Lizard Men tribes'

Kerrith: Okay, I've got just the thing! The R-series!

*picks up some dusty modules and blows them off*

Lilly: What's the R-series?

Kerrith: Rajahs of the Rakashasas! A three part set culminating in an attack on the Rakashasas Palace itself!

Lilly: Sounds nifty.

Aline: Uh...Lilly?

Lilly: Yeah?

Aline: Don't you think that will upset Tirmek if you go on an adventure to slaughter his people?

Lilly: Why? These are NPCs.

Aline: :stare:
rampant

01-10-07, 11:05 AM		Lily - Why are you coming?

Maladren - You need a sneak.

Lily - Why are you helping us to exterminate your own species?

Maladren - They're base Rakshasa, I'm Nazarune.

Lily - Why do you care?

Maladren - I figured I'd take all the treasure and territory while you dupes do all the work.
Charles Phipps

01-10-07, 11:08 AM		Lilly: Why do you think I'll fall for that?

Maladren: Your low wisdom score. I rolled a 2 on my Bluff and I probably still....

Lilly: BY JOVE! THANK GOODNESS WE HAVE YOU ON MY SIDE!

Aline: *SIGH*

Maladren: I worry about you...

Aline: Meh don't, praise Lolth.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-10-07, 03:33 PM		Aline: *SIGH*

Maladren: I worry about you...

Aline: Meh don't, praise Lolth.
Silver: There have to be a few so I don't have to work as hard.
rampant

01-10-07, 04:27 PM		Corre - That was one hell of a month, eh Tear?

Tear - Mew (yes it was)

Corre - Please stop chasing the rats into our room. I'm Tired of Reshalin's screaming.

Tear - mer :rolleyes: (a couple packs of horrid rats and you're marked for life)
Charles Phipps

01-10-07, 04:52 PM		R-1 Ruins of the Rakashasa Module

Lilly: So it's a trilogy of 1st Edition modules that have been updated for 3rd edition?

Kerrith: Yep! It's a fantastic work that's become a megamodule boxed set that will chronicle our journey from 1st to 20th level!

Lilly: Hold on! First level?

Kerrith: Oh it's not so bad!

*Random encounter: Housecat*

Kerrith: OH :censored: It's a housecat!

Lilly:....yeah?

Kerrith: Dude, housecats can kill the average commoner! I'm a wizard, that's only 1d4 hit points at the start!

Lilly: Uh huh.

Aline: It's cute!

Kerrith: *starts frantically casting magic missle*

Aline: KAWAIIIIII! :cloud nine:

*cuddles it*

Lilly: Man, low levels suck in D&D.

Later

Aline: Oh hush! It wasn't like you had that many hit points to heal anyway.

*Kerrith is covered in bandages*

Kerrith: It mauled me!

Dungeon Master: You find yourself in the village Hommlet. A town of four hundred and thirty souls occupying a 300 foot by 300 foot space with...

Lilly: Four hundred people occupy a football field's worth of space permanently?

Dungeon Master: That's what it says.

Lilly: Oiye.

Dungeon Master: You approach the metallic gates of the village where two guards await you in chain mail armor with simple pole rams and grim expressions on their face.

Guard: Welcome to Hommlet!

Lilly: Hey!

Guard: Welcome to Hommlet!

Lilly: We're looking to refurbish our supplies here and find out information for locating the Temple of Ravana.

Guard: Welcome to Hommlet!

Lilly:....

Aline: They didn't update the dialogue boxes did they?

Hommlet Bar

Lilly: Well the adventure doesn't start until we're in a Tavern.

Aline: Are we old enough to drink?

Lilly: In anyone asks, we're halflings.

Aline: I have to steal everything and talk constantly swiftly?

Lilly: That's only Dragonlance.

Aline: Well at least the beer is good.

Lilly: I'm worried that we aren't high enough level for these battles. These stories are meat grinders for low level PCs. Let's ask if any of the locals know any roads back to Sharn. Hey, buddy do...

Tavern Patron 1#: The Temple of Ravana is just outside the village and has threatened us with hordes of monsters, humanoids, and undead since it was erected by an evil member of the Rakashasa race. Oh, please save us, or all hope is lost!

Lilly:....okay.

Aline: Wow, that's weird. Hey, do you know which way to the ladies room?

Tavern Patron 2#: Rakashasas are particularly vulnerable to crossbow bolts and other blessed ranged weapons.

Aline: Uh....huh.

Tavern Patron 3#: There's rumors of a Druid that lives in the forest!

*Lilly and Aline run out of the tavern as the tavern patrons crowd around them spouting plot exposition*

Lilly: *breathes heavily* What the Hell was that?

Aline: Let's go in this Church and take a minute to breathe.

Church of Law

Priest of Law: Welcome to the Church of Law. I am the Priest of Law.

Lilly: Really? What God?

Priest of Law: I can cure wounds for 50 gold pieces!

Lilly: Isn't that rather blasphemous?

Priest of Law: I can raise dead for 500 gold pieces!

Lilly: You're at least 9th level and you're in a dump like Hommlet!?

Priest of Law: A Blessing for your weapons for ten Gold pieces!

Lilly: Urge to smite....rising.

Just before they leave

Kerrith: Well that was productive. We're now all 7th level.

*the village of Hommlet burns brightly behind them*

Lilly: I'm not sure we should have done that. You won't find cheaper rates for raising the dead. He actually loses money on the use of the 5000 gp diamond.

Kerrith: Yeah, all he kept saying was his prices when we stuck the torch to his groin to find out where he hid them.

Aline: Lilly, aren't you a Paladin?

Lilly: I'm allowed to kill neutrals in self defense. It's in the Paladin's charter.

Aline: You felt threatened by them running away?

Lilly: Very.

Kerrith: Well now that we've got the 1st edition move down pat, let's go slaughter some Rakashasas.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-10-07, 05:07 PM		*Random encounter: Housecat*

Kerrith: OH :censored: It's a housecat!

Lilly:....yeah?

Kerrith: Dude, housecats can kill the average commoner! I'm a wizard, that's only 1d4 hit points at the start!
Silver: Why did you make cats so deadly?

Bunny: *points at E.B.N.E.'s name*
urial angel of death

01-10-07, 05:13 PM		Kerrith: Wait we're in first edition *looks up first edition rules for drow* Woot, my intelligence is 20! *looks at gnome illusionist* Bow to me!

OOC: Incase you were wondering at 20 int in the earlier editions you were immune to all illusions gnome could cast with their crappy level limit.
Charles Phipps

01-10-07, 05:16 PM		Lilly: Yeah, if this were second edition though you'd have a 5% magic immunity per level and all sorts of levitation and so on powers thanks to RA Salvatore.

Kerrith: :twitch:

Lilly: Of course, all those cool powers and your magical items would be disenchanted on the surface.

Aline: But that was 1st edition to...

Kerrith: DO NOT MENTION IT TO THE DUNGEON MASTER!
urial angel of death

01-10-07, 05:38 PM		Kerrith: Actually it's sunlight not the surface and remember the power we come conviently equiped with. darkness.

Aline: Yeah but drow didn't have darkvision in 1st ed the had infared.

Kerrith: I'm blinded!
urial angel of death

01-10-07, 05:50 PM		Muradin's training as a monk

Master: See this pebble young grasshopper.

Muradin: ...

Master: Know that in any competition it has achieved more, than you.

Muradin: ...

Master: The pebble has utilized every action, capability, move, and technic it had at it's disposal. It has full achieved its potetial. The pebble has no ability in which it need improve. It has done all that it can do. Hope that some day you can fufill you destiny as thoroughly as this pebble has.

Muradin: ... *smashes pebble*

Master: :twitch:
rampant

01-10-07, 05:53 PM		Maladren - Geeze you guys. It took you this long to torch the town?

Lily - How did you get here before us?

Maladren - Higher base speed.

Kerrith - Whats with the bag *points at bag of holding*

Maladren - *bluff* Feminine products.

Aline - (i.h.h. More likely the preist's diamonds.)
DungeonJman

01-10-07, 08:14 PM		And this is what we call the over use of a joke, the number one leading cause in injuries for people who think that they are bards, but aren't. Any questions?
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-10-07, 08:47 PM		The competitors from the Forgotten freadom apear in a crouded street and get there bearings. Citazens of the gloomy Kranathi city giving them a wide bearth.

Ash "Now for tedium, they gather the very best demolitoners into pne place and then proceded to annoy them with paper work. The mind boggles over why the place is still standing." he notes the open drain along one side of the street and is thankfull for his elocater training "Possibly its too damp to burn..."

A wild eyed man burts from the croud "Ashen Ruin!"

Ash "Its a name I've answered to, yes. What may I do for you?"

Man "you can &%*#@ing die you monster. You killed them, my whole damm family!"

Ash "You were there? In Kirgenhome during the blaze?"

Man "Aye, and I watched you melt her to slag you, you deamon!"

Ash "I am terably sorry." his civalised voice brims with sincer regret, the man looks at him with new eyes.

"Ye are?"

Ash "Why yes" his tone turns darkly satricle "I killed tenthousand that day, do you honestly beleave I meant to leave survivors? Here, go to your family" the man screams and burns, his charing body held in place by Ash's will. "Now brothers, this way" grinning like a feind h leads them into the city, and something in his manner is different.

(ooc: Yes my sence of humor is this macabe)
Kaizer_Ryu

01-10-07, 09:33 PM		Nalfein: Hang on. Why did you do that?

Ash: Is it really any of your business?

Nalfein: You're damn right it is! You just torched that guy!

Ash stares at him for several minutes in stunned silence.

Ash: :blink: You...you didn't like that I did that?

Nalfein: :rant: Of course I didn't! You just torched THAT guy! There's all these other people just standing there BEGGING to be burned! Do you SEE all the kindling they've so conveniently gathered and turned into deathtraps?!

Liam: But those are just buildi-...oh.

Ash: ...you know, I was actually worried about you for a second there.
rampant

01-10-07, 11:05 PM		Satnak - We need to get this kid an agent.

Serene - Yes.

Dorvos is playing outside the Phiarlan complex in sharn. Most of the enclave looks on with mixtures of appreciation and jealousy as the crowd screams for encore after encore.

Mittens - mew (thats right look at the minstrel, while i cut your purses:D )

-----------------------------------------------

Tirmek - I think thats everything, where's Sarah?
Kaizer_Ryu

01-10-07, 11:36 PM		Terra: *fret*

Sarah: :rolleyes: Mom, it's just a date.

Terra: *fuss*

Sarah: *sigh* I'm just going out with my best friend, not performing live.

Terra: *worry*

Sarah: Momma, can you do something about this?

Lisa: *bemused* Sorry, honey. This is the best I could do.

Terra: *stress*

Sarah: *groan* Mom, please. I'm gonna be late.

Terra: ...ok. Have a great time, dear.

-----

Tirmek: There you a-whoa...

Sarah wears an indigo summer dress with embroided flowers of a slightly lighter shade and her shoulder length hair is braided with a matching ribbon and her favorite scrunchy. She spins around once and smiles at him.

Sarah: :D You like?

Tirmek: I-

Nina: *appearing from nowhere* Where are we going?

Sarah & Tirmek: Gah!

Deis: Sorry, ne-chan. I tried to stop her.

Sarah: Nina, it's just going to be the two of us.

Nina: :bigeyes:

Sarah: Not even the big, adorable anime eyes are going to work. This is our first date.

Nina: *sigh* A picnic under the stars. It's so romantic... :cloud9:

Deis: :nonono: C'mon, you. *drags her away*
luna18moon

01-10-07, 11:48 PM		Rip, Tear and Shred are still sitting on the ledge.
Shred: .......HOW LONG IS THIS GOING TO TAKE???
Tear: We can
Rip: sense Mittens
Tear: but not
Rip: Nashvir.
Shred: *watching portal* Good, good... *double take* Wait, WHAT?
Rip: Just what
Tear: we said.
Shred: But you're extremely telepathic! You can sense nigh anything in existence! How can you not sense Nashvir?
Rip: Well...
Tear: It's possible
Rip: that he
Tear: is a spirit.
Shred: :confused: Huh?
Rip: He might be
Tear: a neko-fami spirit.
Shred: A dead cat familiar? Possible... that would explain why we can see him and Mittens can interact with him. She has a high spirit sensitivity AND she's a cat. Come to think of it, no one other than us cats has ever noticed him.
Rip: Continued observation
Tear: would be ideal.
Shred: Agreed.
rampant

01-10-07, 11:55 PM		Elina - Why don't you ever take me anyplace romantic?:mad:

Yuan - *anime sweatdrop* (i.h.h. what did i do to deserve this?)

---------------------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Geh! How did I end up carrying everything up the mountain?

Sarah - I've found the perfect spot!

Tirmek - (i.h.h. note to self: Take last crineapple in vengeance)

Sarah - we've raced this drop a thousand times

Tirmek - 1002 total

Sarah - :rolleyes: , and yet Its like I'm seeing this view for the first time

Tirmek - Yeah, the staff doesn't allow night races.

Sarah - You're doing it again.

Tirmek - Get the bottled water off my head and I'll be romantic.

Sarah turns to find Tirmek buried under the blanket, the picnic basket and a few things like the bottled water that just didn't quite fit in the basket.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-11-07, 12:15 AM		OOC: It occurs to me that Rich Burlew gets a :rofl: award for the best use of a Hold Person spell ever (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0398.html).

In related news, Thog is officially the best Bad Guy in all history.
rampant

01-11-07, 12:41 AM		Sarah - Nice outfit.

Tirmek (finally out from under the stuff) self-consiously dusts off the green, stiff, slightly oversized shirt, and the loose (but secure, no pantsing) brown pants.

Tirmek - Its traditional formal garb, I'm just glad I was able to get mother to get the shirt in green.

Sarah - So you all man tonight or what?

Tirmek - Naw! *shift*

Sarah - Darnit!

Tirmek - What?

Sarah - Are you wearing a bra under your boy clothes now?

Tirmek - Thats what you were angling for?

Sarah - :embarrass

Tirmek - Anyway no, I'm just having my underclothes enchanted, and making some less gender specific selecions in the rest of the wardrobe.

Sarah - Why not get all your clothes modded?

Tirmek - Its kinda expensive.

Sarah - Ah

Tirmek - its 11:10 we better set up.
Charles Phipps

01-11-07, 01:02 AM		R-2 Rage of the Rakashasa

Rakashasa Female: Hello! Welcome to the Lady of the Goody Rakashasa! How may...

Lilly: Attack of oppportunity!

Rakashasa Female: GAH! Why are you driving your sword into my soft and defenseless flesh!?

*dies*

Lilly: Another blow against the forces of evil!

Aline: How did you know she's evil.

Lilly: Detect Evil of course.

Aline: Wouldn't her evil outsider aura mean that she'd show up as evil anyway?

Lilly: Yes, because she's EVIL!

Maladren: That's seven Rakashasas killed since we started this module.

Lilly: Yeah, those evil rapid Rakashasas cubs in the Tomb's Center were BRUTAL.

Aline: How would you know, you tossed fireballs on them until they died!

Lilly: Evil Evil Evil.

Yuana: FOR SHAME! HOW COULD YOU LILLY!?

Lilly: What the hell are you doing here!?

Yuana: I am travelling with Elina to this peaceful village and seeing your murderous ways! Have you learned nothing!?

Elina: Monster! How could you kill poor and defenseless Rakashasa cubs!

Maladren: Actually, by the nature of being evil outsiders, they were alive since the beginning of time.

Elina: Errr....

Maladren: Being incarnations of evil, only halfbreeds can actually avoid the fate of utter and complete damnation.

Elina: Aren't you a pureblooded noble?

Maladren: Yes.

Lilly: You can tell he's good though since no evil person would aid in the organized genocide of his own people.

Elina: .....how much have you been using Suggestion on Lilly?

Aline: Only to the maximum of my spell slots for 3rd level....every day....for three months.

Yuan: But these were goodly Rakashasas! You shall not...

Rakashasa Mayor: Curse you Paladin! You successfully deduced that this was all a ruse to lure unsuspecting travellers into our midst then devour then!

Aline: SNEAK ATTACK :censored:!

Rakashasa Mayor: OW! I wonder what happened there....but you won't get away goodly...

Aline: SNEAK ATTACK!

Rakashasa Mayor: I wonder why I feel pain while monologuing. You will be doomed! DOOMED!

Aline: Sneak.....oh hell, just chop off his head Lilly.

*The Rakashasa surprising dies at the hand of the +5 Holy Avenger of Demon Slaying*

Aline: Where did you get that anyway?

Lilly: A random chest. Surprising, Anti-Rakashasa weapons are just lying all about the place.

Aline: I admit, I did find it curious there were 15 bolts of +3 Rakashasa Slaying weapons.

Lilly: Old modules are odd that way.

Elina: What are you guys doing anyway?

Aline: LARPing.

Elina: Oh! I love LARPing! I'm on a date with Yuana!

Lilly: :twitch:

Aline: *licks lips* Mmmmm your jealousy is pleasing to me.

Malagren: Less talk, more slaughtering the inferior Tiger Demons.

Yuan: I must travel along to minimize the bloodshed and carnage through the use of diplomacy!

Aline: In a 1E module?

Yuan: Why yes, is that a problem?

*Screams of dying Rakashasas*

*A blood soaked Lilly*

Lilly: Okay we've got three levels to clear out of this village before we reach the gate to Tirmek's party! Won't he be surprised!

Aline: Since this is the thinly disguised Vault of the Drow portion of the module, we'll have to slay an avatar of Ravana first.

Lilly: Who the hell IS Ravana anyway?

Aline: Since the closest analogue is the god, probably the Traveller.

***

At the Bottom of the Vault of the Rakashasas

High Priest Rose: SOON! THE TRAVELLER SHALL COME!

*A big marshmellow hand ascends through a burning pit*
rampant

01-11-07, 01:22 AM		Maladren - What was that he comment.

Lily - Nothing grand heigness, mistress of all incarnations of the material. A simple slip of this poor mortal's tounge.

Elina - Impressive

Aline - You should see him fetch my slippers.

Maladren - I'm not even dating him. (i.h.h. you'd think with all the other girls taken or out of the age bracket i'd get some action, but noooo )
Crystalforged

01-11-07, 01:43 AM		OOCrystalforged: :allalone:

OOKanatash: :waits: Still nothing?

OOCrystalforged: Unless you count internal monolougs, no.

OOKanatash: This is getting tiring. You really can't come up with any ideas?

OOCrystalforged: No good ones at least. Heck I'm having trouble coming up with bad ones.

OOKanatash: There's gotta be something.

OOCrystalforged: Well the only major plot going on right now is the kids and I really can't insert you into that. I plan to insert Kitten somehow but she's indisposed at the moment. Plus I don't want to create another throw away character just to get involved.

OOKanatash: Can't you start a new plot?

OOCrystalforged: I could but I can only really come up with two ideas for plots.

OOKanatash: And they are?

OOCrystalforged: Well the first is to have some enemy force show up to attack the FF/Eberron. The problem there is no matter how powerful they are or how inteligent they are they somehow end up doing the equivilent of a zerg rush and being decimated in one or two posts by the ubers.

OOKanatash: Yeah, thats kinda a problem. Whats the second idea?

OOCrystalforged: Well the other would be a character death. The problem is if I kill off one of the lesser used characters, no one cares and if I kill of someone elses character they get ******. All that leaves is my own characters and only two of them are actually important, you and Kitten, and Kitten probably belongs to Silvercat as much as me. Hmmm... :shifty:

OOKanatash: I do not like the way you're looking at me. What about that new voice, Minda?

OOCrystalforged: (sizing up Kanatash) Oh, she's still in my head somewhere, probably buried in my subconsious. She just doen't seem to have much to say. Now, what to do with you?

OOKanatash: (nervous) You know wouln't killing me sort of count as suicide since I'm part of yourself?

OOCrystalforged: (examining a number of bladed instruments that have appeared out of mid-air) Nah, you're just an imaginary construct that has taken on a life of its own. In reality you wouldn't so much die as be consumed into my larger consciousness.

OOKanatash: (backing away) Wait, wait, would we be talking Perma-death or is this going to be a somebody find a cleric death?

OOCrystalforged: (sharpening a rather large and evil looking blade) Well its really not a significant event if they just come back to life, now is it?

OOKanatash: You know, I think I'm really not liking where this train of thought is going.

OOCrystalforged: (donning bunny mask) I can live with that.

OOKanatash: (fleeing) Run away! He's ****ing crazy!

OOCrystalforged: (chasing) Come back here you delicious plot hook, you!
rampant

01-11-07, 01:46 AM		OOKanatash: (fleeing) Run away! He's ****ing crazy!

Kithle - I'm sorry was that supposed to be news? :bored:
DungeonJman

01-11-07, 02:10 AM		:teach: Actually, the scale of how bad it would be depends on how hard Crystalforged whacks you. It also works that way for the "Strike of X Times Death". It cracks the soul, making it take more ressurections to bring them back, until the point at which it has enough force to outright shatter the opponents soul.
ratslinky

01-11-07, 07:21 AM		OORatslinky: Crystalforged I share your pain *trips Kanatash as he runs past* and I can't kill my character cause he really is a part of me so it looks like i'll have to make a new one. Momo do you have those tentacles I ordered

Momo: Yep

OORatslinky: Good now I just have to think of what type of character to create
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-11-07, 08:17 AM		Kanatash: CARALOT!

Caralot: Yes, Kanny?

Kanatash: SAVE ME FROM MY ENTITY!

Caralot: Big baby. :rolleyes: (steps in front of OOCrystalforged) I don't think I can let you do this: Kitten's already got a fragile on reality, coming back to find that he father's dead would send her over the edge no matter what my family's instilled in her.

13: As if that would happen before you got him ressurrected.

OOcat: Quiet, you.

Caralot: There are a whole lot of parody plotlines you could do: Zelda titles, 8-bit, magical-girl animé with me as the ditzy yet powerful main character and Kanatash as my cliché "knight in shining armor". Not all plotlines have to be serious.

13: Exhibit A. *points*

OOcat: :mad:
Phantomcrossing

01-11-07, 08:22 AM		On the deck of the Freedom.


Norbaz: Alright, twenty test casings and batches of the Chili-pult ammunition?

Pholly: Check.

Norbaz: Okay, special designed Chili-pult?

Ketler: Check...by the mourning how did you rope me into this?

Norbaz: Dunno, you were asleep and I left the work order on your desk.

Pholly: I think we're ready to test this out, I'll load the first barrel.

Norbaz & Ketler: NOO!

Ketler: Let Norbaz do it Pholly....the barrels are bigger than you.

Moments later.

Norbaz: Okay, test fire 1, 19 Alarm meaty Chili, Ceramic Shell Casing.

Ketler: Range, check. Target, check. Ready to go.

Pholly: Is it such a good idea to be doing this so close to Sharn...and for that matter, targeting inside of Sharn.

Ketler: Its alright, we're aiming for Cainith Tower.

A 60 foot tall marshmallow man erupts into the city of towers.

Pholly: KHYBER!

The marshmallow man steps on a church of the Sovereign Host.

Norbaz: Nobody steps on a church in my town. Ketler! Get him!

Ketler activates the Chili-Pult, lobbing the ceramic casing of 19 Alarm Meaty Chili at the marshmallow monstrosity. It hits the target, causing it to ignite. Now a fiery 60 foot tall marshmallow man is wracking havoc upon the city of Sharn.

Ketler: ...
Norbaz: ...
Pholly: ...

Ketler: So...recalibrate and aim for Cainith tower?

Norbaz: Yeah, sounds like a plan.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-11-07, 01:42 PM		……a fiery 60 foot tall marshmallow man is wracking havoc upon the city of Sharn.
A strong wind blows out the fire. The mashmallow man runs into a monolith of chocolate. From out of the sky swoop two graham cracker halfs like an ancient titan flyswatter, smushing the marshmallow against the chocolate. The entire edifice is raised into the clouds above, and there is a great crunch followed by a rumbling "Mmmmmm".

FX demon: *Monty Python theme*
Paulon

01-11-07, 02:03 PM		OOC: No plot additions here, but my thanks to those who've posted links to the Order of the Stick webcomic. I finally had a chance to start reading it last night, and while I only got as far as page 75 in my first viewing session, I was laughing my head off, both from the comic itself, and seeing how it's affected the folks, plots, and jokes of the Forgotten Freedom.
DungeonJman

01-11-07, 02:47 PM		And then a giant foot comes and squashes whatever's left of Sharn (the 43rd rebuilt one)
rampant

01-11-07, 04:30 PM		Tirmek - Ok see those four in an rectangle with that blueish one as the corner?

Sarah - yes

Tirmek - Thats the front cover of the book, those three in the L-shape are the back cover, see how it looks like an open book from an angle?

Sarah - I see it.

Tirmek - Ok you see that one star off on its own a bit a little ways above the book?

Sarah - That's the eye?

Tirmek - No thats the tear, the eye is obscured by a nebula. That nebula usually obscures the eye, except in late winter and spring, usually by that time the book has moved out of the sky until the nebula is back in place. Once every ten-thousand years or so the nebula moves away early enough for both to be seen.
Crystalforged

01-11-07, 04:32 PM		Kanatash is kneeling in a dark room with his hands tied behind his back and his head on the chopping block of a guilotine. A hooded executioner stands nearby ready to drop the blade when the phone rings.

Executioner: (picking up phone) Hello? (pause) Alright, got it. (hangs up phone and turns to Kanatash) Looks like your lucky day. You just got a reprieve from the governor, sounds like he might have a "project" for you.

Kanatash: Thank the deranged lords! I don't wanna die.

Executioner: (snort) You thought you were going to die?

Kanatash: YOU PUT ME IN A ****ING GUILOTINE!

Executioner: Yeah, and? (drops the blade)

The razor sharp blade drops down slicing through Kanatash's neck without any resistance. There is no blood or gore. In fact Kanatash's head doesn't move an inch.

Kanatash: (opening eyes) Huh, what happened?

Minda: (removing hood) You seriously didn't notice that the blade wasn't ghost touch? Sheesh, your an idiot.

OOCrystalforged: (porting in) She's got a point. That was an amature mistake on your part.

Kanatash: Why put me in this thing if the blade can't hurt me?!

OOCrystalforged: Oh, you see I never seriously considered killing you off from the begining. I just like to give you little reminders every now and then of who's in charge here. Keep you on your toes.

Kanatash: (glaring at OOCrystalforged) Have you been subcontracting Kithle?

OOCrystalforged: Nah, although for what I'm thinking of next maybe I should contact him. He doesn't like people treading on his turf.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-11-07, 05:58 PM		Kanatash: (glaring at OOCrystalforged) Have you been subcontracting Kithle?
13: That reminds me, how are we coming on a girlfriend for Ketler?
Charles Phipps

01-11-07, 06:00 PM		Ketler: I already have a girlfriend.

*pause*

Ketler: YES! A REAL ONE!
Kaizer_Ryu

01-11-07, 06:37 PM		As Sarah and Tirmek await the conjunction, she scoots ever closer.

Tirmek: (i.h.h.) Ok...don't panic...

Closer.

Tirmek: (i.h.h.) You've known each other for how long?

Closer still.

Tirmek: (i.h.h.) No need to be nervous...

She puts her hand next to his.

Tirmek: (i.h.h.) Nose...bleeding...

And sets her head on his shoulder.

Tirmek: :gel:

Sarah: *giggle*

Tirmek: You did that just to get my fur to puff out, didn't you?

Sarah: :D
rampant

01-11-07, 07:07 PM		Tirmek - Its happening...

Above the star called the tear, 4 stars come into veiw as if a veil had been pulled from them. Their shape is that of rough diamond. Within them is a cluster of smaller stars forming the pupil. The eye seems to be reading the open book constellation, while weeping (thus the star called tear).
Charles Phipps

01-11-07, 07:20 PM		Elsewhere

Rakashasa: OH WHY RAVANA! WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN US!

Lilly: DAMNIT! STOP RESPAWNING!

Rakashasa: Send no more reinforcements! Our city is lost!
Kaizer_Ryu

01-11-07, 10:56 PM		Volrath: GAH! *grabs his head*

P/Y/R: Something the matter, dear?

Volrath: I really need to turn down my mental alarm...

-----

Deis: *baby talk* Aren't you a good horror from beyond reality! Yes you are. Yes you are!

Tentacled Horror: :D Arf! *wags what appears to be it's 37 tails ending in screaming faces*

Volrath: *warping in* :doh: Again?! How many times do I have to tell you not to sneak in here?

Deis: :bigeyes: But they're so adorable!

Volrath: They're terrifying creatures that will rend the flesh from your bones if they get half the chance! Do you have any idea what your parents would do to me if you were hurt in here?

Deis is currently rubbing the belly of another creature with five legs, at least a dozen heads with one mouth stretched along all of them, and a Pez dispenser protruding from it's chest.

Deis: But Uncle, look at it! It want's to be petted!

Volrath: *groan*

Horror from Beyond: Prrrrrrrrrrr... :cloud9:
DungeonJman

01-11-07, 11:30 PM		*reads a court order*

Darn it, uhhh Dorvos, i don't think that we can do the joke.

Dorvos: Hmmmm!

*DungeonJ drags the alcada filled with potato salad and throws it off the side of the ship*

DungeonJ: How'd that get here? Anyway, we can't do the background music joke because we're not allowed by some law to ruin the moment.

*Mittens is carrying a bucket of glue, a match, a bucket of firecrackers and an accordion*

Well that wasn't what i had in mind anyway.

Mittens: Meow (Laws shmaws, i'm messing something up, NOW!)
Phantomcrossing

01-11-07, 11:30 PM		Deep in the bowels of the Forgotten Freedom...

Axiomatic Half Fiend Wolf #1: Snarl!

Axiomatic Half Fiend Wolf #2: Howl!

Axiomatic Half Fiend Wolf #3: MEOW!

The first two Axiomatic Half Fiend Wolves turn to face their fellow and shake their streamlined, steely, & horned lupine faces. Then they resumed their snarling and barking chase against a figure clad in the colors of the silver flame and the masked face that when visible looked as though a more angular and thinned version of the face adorning pontiff Jaela, Speaker of the Flame. But lo, this was the last of the Jaela clone created by Ketler, some time ago force aged to the age of 26 by the combined dreams of too many members of the forgotten freedom crew when the ship passed through DalQour, realm of dreams. Ahead of her a red shirt entered the hall reading a magazine, cheerfully he looked up just as NJ26 bolted past him.

Redshirt: Good morning nice to see- ARGH! MY SPLEEN!

His cries echoed as the jagged chrome wolf leaps through his chest.

NJ26: Fool.

Her voice full of annoyance and scorn.

She had discovered these beasts hiding among the cargo hold. Someone had been spying on the freedom, someone with a bent for metal. Hell Bent for Metal. She sighed internally, at least it wasn't leather. Running along the wall, she draws her over-sized shuriken and hurls it towards one of the wolves, splitting it soundly down the middle. The other two break off and head back into the deck.

NJ26: I should inform the captain.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-11-07, 11:54 PM		Momo: COOL!

Axiomatic Half-Fiend Wolf: SNARL!

Momo: *appearing randomly about the wolf anime style* :D Howdoesitwork?Thecraftmanshipissuperb!Oh Iwanttoknowwhatmakesittick!Thisisjustsoa wesome!IwonderifMomwouldletmekeepone? :D

A.H.F.W: Growl?

Momo: :D WowIcan'tevenfindwherethescrewsareputin! Whoeverdidthishassomerealknowhow.Maybehe re?Orhere?Oh,whatabout-

A.H.F.W: :eek: :embarrass

Momo: SorryMr.WolfbutIreallywanttoknowwhathold syoutogethersowell! :D

Scias: Th-th-th-th...................these. *holds up a bunch of screws*

The wolf mech falls apart, leaving only a jumble of parts lying about.

Momo: Awwww... Now I don't know what goes where... :(

Scias: R-r-r-r-r......................rebuild it.

Momo: :thinks: :lightbulb :plotting: :evillaugh I hereby declare this my new project! :w00t: *stuffs the parts in a Bag of Holding and runs off*

Scias: S-s-s-s.............sis is s-s-s-s.................... *anime sweatdrop* .................scary.

OOC: I just figured out who Momo reminds me of. Professor Farnsworth (Futurama) and Washu (Tenchi Muyo).
rampant

01-12-07, 12:10 AM		Sarah - Hello a little attencion over here!

OOKaizer - Meep, what about OOrampant?

Sarah - He's waiting for you, because frankly this is as far as he can go with planned plot after this its you and improv.
Crystalforged

01-12-07, 12:19 AM		Kanatash is standing outside Terra and Lisa's room. He knocks and Terra appears moments later.

Terra: Yes? What is it Kanatash?

Kanatash: I have a little bit of a proposal for you.

Terra: This isn't going to involve one of your insane plots is it?

Kanatash: Surprisingly no. What I want to talk to you about is something completely normal and mundane.

Terra: :blink: Wow, this has got to be a first. Why don't you come in.

Kanatash: Alright.

They settle into a couple of chairs.

Kanatash: (sigh) Well I suppose I should explain my reasons for coming first. You see between Kitten running away and going to visit her grandparents I really haven't seen her very much. Now after watching her grow up it just seems so empty with just Caralot and I. Plus my entity won't authorize another child, at least not yet. I suppose I'm just really suffering from empty nest syndrom. Anyways I was wondering if you would allow me do the babysitting for your four younger ones.

Terra: I guess I can understand where you're coming from Kanatash but I'm just not certain we need a babysitter.

Kanatash: Are you sure? I mean you two need some time to yourselves and those kids seem to have a great capacity for getting into trouble.

Terra: Well I do have my network to keep an eye on them.

Kanatash: True enough but if I know anything about kids the first thing they're going to do is to try and find ways around you're network. I have my own eyes everywhere which would be considerably harder to escape.

Terra: You've mentioned you have eyes everywhere before but you never went into detail.

Kanatash: Yes, well you see its a little embarassing. I'm sure you know with all the crazy stuff that happens around here this ship is closely tied to Xoriat. Well the truth is that the two share a relationship not unlike that of the the Material and Ethereal planes. The creatures of Xoriat can observe this ship at anytime just by concentrating. In fact its become something like a reality TV show to them. Its starting to scare me in fact. Many of them are starting to spend hours if not days just watching what happens on this ship and little else. I have no shortage of contacts among these beings which can relay information. Suffice to say while your children may be able to escape the watchful eyes of several squirels the eyes of several million creatures which are beyond mortal comprehension is signifcantly more difficult.

Terra: Won't typical warding stop them?

Kanatash: Er, not really. I haven't come across anything yet that blocks their sight. They see everything.

Terra: Even-

Kanatash: Yes. I believe there is a petition being gathered at this moment of ideas and suggestions for you two.

Terra: :embarrass

Kanatash: So do I have the job? I promise not to indoctrinate them with any of my ideas about destroying the universe or breaking virgin minds. :bigeyes:
rampant

01-12-07, 12:27 AM		Kithle - Probably a smart move Kanatash, kids are much more interested in mischief and mayhem.

Terra - I take it you're the one slipping Momo the various alchemical recipes.

Kithle - :D I'm especially proud of the stink bomb, and the silly string. I'm really impressed with how she took those and ran with them. Burning silly string, exploding ice-cube flies, that kid is a genius!
Kaizer_Ryu

01-12-07, 12:46 AM		OOKazier: Well, crap. I was hoping he had more in mind.

Sarah: You went into this without a full plan?! What about my romantic evening?! This has been in the works how long?!

OOKaizer: You have to understand; the only dating experience I have is from reading Shojo manga, and Tirmek just doesn't fit the bill of Bishounen love interest.

Sarah: *buries her head in her hands*

Tirmek: So you did this whole buildup and have no follow through. Way to drop the ball. :rolleyes:

OOKaizer: Well, I have something for the end of the date, but I figured you'd get mad if I finished up too soon...

Sarah: Being ignored doesn't exactly make us happy, either.

OOKaizer: Gimme a bit. I'll think of something. Just...I dunno...feed each other while giggling, or whatever. I'll be back...eventually...

Tirmek: Your confidence is simply overwhelming. :nonono:

-----

Terra: Well...we could use a break. We'll see how things go for now. I just hope you're not biting off more than you can chew.

Kanatash becomes corporeal.

Kanatash: The hell?!

Scias: *behind him and incorporeal* G-g-g-g...........ghosty.

Terra: *sigh* Scias, give that back.

Scias: :allalone: *returns Kanatash's incorporeality*
ratslinky

01-12-07, 01:13 AM		Esabar: So I break 20 virgin minds a year and you'll give me information for the FF

Monsters from Xoriat: Yep just one thing. We have finished the petition for Terra and Lisa but we are scared they might beat us up. But if you deliver all the petitions then we are anonymous you also have to deliver any new ones we come up with

Esabar: Good good now just sign here and here and here

Gaz: Hey Esa- what are you doing!

Esabar: Signing a contract now just go back to watching the Blues Brothers

Gaz: Wait that contract says :headexplo. How many times have I told you to :rant: :rant:

Esabar: Never mind him

Monster from Xoriat: *signs contract*
rampant

01-12-07, 01:32 AM		Tirmek - These are so good.

Sarah - I know, mmmmmmmm

Tirmek - The best part is : no processed sugar! I can eat these without completely losing control of my faculties.

Sarah - You know going berzerk isn't necessarily a bad thing.

Tirmek - Not for a Berzerker, but for people like me who don't actually gain any tangible benefit, its just dangerous.

Sarah - As far as I can see you're not as strong as me, not as fast, not as tough, not as powerful, yet you keep up. How?

Tirmek - Training : I'm not as strong, but I know how to use what strength i do have to best effect.

Sarah - Like how you always parry close to the hilt, with the end of your weapon?

Tirmek - Exactly, its a matter of leverage.

Sarah - Doesn't help much against my claws.

Tirmek - No, but incase you hadn't noticed in hybrid form your hands are bigger than mine.

Sarah - and?

Tirmek - Shift your hand.

Sarah - Give me a sec, I'm still learning this partial shift trick. Grrrrr

Sarah's left hand sprouts blue-grey fur and lengthens into her hybrid form claws.

Tirmek - Watch, Put your hand against mine. See, I can close my fingers around your knuckles. That pretty much paralyses tha hand till I let go. You close yours, and yes you can hold me still, but i can still move my hand within yours.

Tirmek - ... You can let go now...
ratslinky

01-12-07, 02:36 AM		OORatslinky: Hmm

Gaz: What?

OORatslinky: I think I may have thought up what I want in a char and if I go female she can be your love interest

Gaz: Whatever

OORatslinky: What your not going to say somthing like A LOVE INTEREST :blink: :OMG! :twitch:

Gaz: Nope as one of the most popular kids in my age group i'm used to it

OORatslinky: :blink: :OMG! :twitch: *after several days OORatslinky wake up from the coma* Oh gods why did I have to forget the fact that he was a beguiler just then. I'll post the stats soon and then a way of getting her no wait :plotting:

Gaz: What are you thinking

OORatslinky: Nothing nothing *innocent look* i'll get to the stats now. :cookie: if you can guess what i'm thinking
Kaizer_Ryu

01-12-07, 02:53 AM		Sarah: :smirk: There is a little flaw in this technique...

Tirmek: ...you're not going to let go, are you?

Sarah: In a moment... I just want to warn you. If you grab hold like that and I grab back, I could do something like this-!

With a quick yank, she succeeds in her one goal for the night. Tirmek is rather surprised to find his lips planted firmly on Sarah's.

-----

Silver: :rant: IT'S ABOUT FREAKING TIME! :mad:

13: It's times like this that make all those last second interruptions over the years worth the effort. :D

-----

After several seconds, Sarah disengages.

Sarah: See? ;)
rampant

01-12-07, 09:47 AM		Tirmek - :cloud9:

Sarah - Come on shift I want to try that with girl you.

Tirmek - I take it this means, I'm your ....ah ....um ...?

Sarah - Shift and kiss me, we'll work out the details later.
Charles Phipps

01-12-07, 10:23 AM		OOC: In homage to HBO's Rome.

IC:

The Capital of the Rakashasa Empire

Gaius Julius Rakashasaer: Oh woe, dear Voreneus, the war against the loathsome humans goes well but my rivals in the Senate are plotting against me. We must swiftly in order to secure our power base before March.

Rakashasa Pullo: *BEELCCCCCCCCCCHHHH*

Rakashasa Voreneus: Fear not Rajah. We have recruited a special group of Rakashasa warriors. Though I have never seen their faces and their party was mysteriously waylaid before they arrived, I'm sure they will do the job.

Gaius Julius Rakashasaer: Excellent. Show their leader in.

*Lilly walks in with a very obviously fake set of cat ears on his head*

Gaius Julius Rakashasaer: Zounds that is an ugly Rakashasa.

Rakashasa Voreneus: But capable milord.

Rakashasa Pullo: So, when do we eat?

Gaius Julius Rakashasaer: You fool! We have no time for such epicurian pleasures! My sister Atia is hosting a party for her nephew Tirmek whom is possibly to become my heir because I am childless. His sister Tirmania has recently returned from her marriage that failed because we killed her first husband to marry her to my rival Pompreiarakashasa only to have her cast aside as a harlot.

Lilly::confused:

Rakashasa Pullo: Isn't she currently sleeping with Brutushaka's mother?

Lilly: HELLO!

Gaius Julius Rakashasaer: Only so long as with this young fair half-breed assassin of our race yon fails to bring death and destruction unto their fair house.

Lilly: You want me to kill them?

Gaius Julius Rakashasaer: Kill! Kill! Kill! Nay! Eliminate! Remove! Extricate and dispose of forthwidth!

Rakashasa Pullo: Yeah, he means kill. It's the fourth house on the left.

Lilly: Oh that one. Yeah....everyone's sort of dead.

Rakashasa Pullo: Oh, good job.

Lilly: Thanks. It was closer and looked to be full of treasure and EXP

Rakashasa Pullo: That's why I joined the Legions!

Gaius Julius Rakashasaer: GASP! HE WAS A CONSUL OF ROMESHAKA! Woe! Woe! Woe be my enemies thus slain!

*pause*

Gaius Julius Rakashasaer: :evillaugh :schemes: :devil: Now there is nothing to stop me from enacting my thirty year plot to become not only dictator for life of Romeshaka but also :king: !

Rakashasa Voreneus: But Great Rakashaesar! Didn't the oracle tell you that yon death would soon be upon thee at Tirmek's ascendency to the age of majority?

Gaius Julius Rakashasaer: Fool! Mine genius nephew shall never REACH his age of ascendency!

*Long lingering camera shot*

Lilly: *whisper* I have no idea what the hell is going on.

Rakashasa Pullo: I think that means he's going to have Tirmek killed.

Lilly: *raises hand to volunteer as he jumps up and down*

Gaius Julius Rakashasaer: Our plots and counterplots shall at last come to a head when he walks forth into his aunt atia's party to be seduced by the winsome pleasures of hundreds of beautiful courtesans, food, and drink to dull his mind before brutal and nightmarish DEATH shall fall upon him.

Rakashasa Pullo: You could just stab him ya'know. I can get a knife. We'll go right now.

Gaius Julius Rakashasaer: Nay nay nay! For the revenge of Sweet Arijani whom was dictator before me must come at a much more pronounced cost for I shall bring this group of powerful ruffians to a gathering place of the greatest and most noble rakashasa in the world!

Lilly: You're inviting us to the party!

Gaius Julius Rakashasaer: Yes, in close proximity to all the leaders of my race. Our bodies unadorned by armor or surrounded by our bodyguards while you have all your weapons nearby to carve into our defenseless tigerish flesh.

Lilly: Sweet!

Gaius Julius Rakashasaer: *turns away from Lilly* Of course little does he suspect that they shall JOIN Tirmek in oblivion's sweet embrace!

Lilly: Uhhh...

Rakashasa Pullo: You're not supposed to hear him talking about killing you when his back is turned.

Lilly: Right. See ya at the party then.

Gaius Julius Rakashasaer: Yes, for as soon as Tirmek loses his virginity so shall I rise to Kingship! Let no one harm his flesh until that time until which I bring his DOOM!

The Forum

Elina: So this is where Tirmek grew up?

Yuan: Yeah.

Elina: It's just like any other city except there's constant orgies spilling out into the streets, people stabbing each other in the back, poisonings, and narration.

Yuan: No wonder Lilly is having so much fun.
rampant

01-12-07, 10:42 AM		Maladren - Get back in there and make with the stabby! I want those bastards dead!

Lily - Naw I like their plot for getting themselves all bunched up and bumping off Tirmek first.

Maladren - Bonus exp for foiling the villian's plot.

Lily - Here's my axe, lets go a slaughterin'
urial angel of death

01-12-07, 12:58 PM		OOC: Assume this is happening at the same time as the Mythos Park stuff.

IC: Satnak wandered through a forest of crystal trees and glass underbrush. It was so beautiful and awe inspiring that she wanted to stay there forever. But of course she couldn’t.

Voice: Momma wakeup!

Satnak: Just a little while longer.

Voice: Momma!

The dream world began to fade and Satnak knew she wouldn’t be able to reclaim it, at least for tonight. She woke up to a barrage of pokes and pinches from her son Dorvos.

Dorvos: There’s somebody here you see you.

Dorvos led her to the entrance of her apartment. Sitting on the stairs outside was a vaguely familiar toothy grin.

Izzy: Why hello. :D

Satnak: Do I know you?

Izzy: Yes, err… well you used to. I’ll explain on the way there. We’ve got to get moving.

Satnak: What for?

Izzy: To save the world.

OOC: Also a :mrt: to Phippes for one of the greastest posts so fair.

OOKaizer: *glare*

OOUrial: I said one of.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-12-07, 03:33 PM		OOcat: And the :evillaugh award for best dumb villain goes to……………

(do I even need to say it?)
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-12-07, 03:36 PM		Elina: It's just like any other city except there's constant orgies spilling out into the streets, people stabbing each other in the back, poisonings, and narration.
Silver and Bunny: What do you mean except?
Charles Phipps

01-12-07, 03:37 PM		Picnic

Tirmek: Sarah, I just want you to know something...

Sarah: Yes?

Tirmek: I...I...lov....lo...

*A Red and Black haired woman then bounces up to Tirmek and grabs him in an attack glomp*

Atia: TIRMEKEEEPOO!

Tirmek: AHHHHHH!

Atia: Whose a cute widdle kitty! YOU! YES YOU ARE! YESSSSSS YOU ARE!

Tirmek: Sweet Merciful Ravana!

Atia: And what's this? You've got a human toy! How kyote!

Sarah: The hell...

*Sarah is scooped up into the Rakashasa Matron's arms as she is squeezed within an inch of her life*

Sarah: *her arms struggling out from the huggle* Who...the...hell...is this?

Tirmek: It's my Aunt Atia! She's the one I told you about!

*Sarah and Tirmek are set down as they can gasp for air, a Tiger's tail and cat ears pop out while Atia giggles*

Atia: At last! I have you in my clutches you widdle Woogams!

Tirmek: Auntie! I told you not to do that sort of thing anymore! I've almost reached the age of majority amongst my kind!

Atia: Mmm hmm. So have you seduced your sister yet?

Sarah: :OMG!

Tirmek: NO! That's disgusting!

Atia: Oh only to humans! You must have ULTIMATE POWER over your siblings if you are carve a bloody empire from the Demon Wastes to Xen'drick!

*Atia pinches his cheek*

Tirmek: MAaaaaaaaah!

Sarah: I thought she was your Aunt.

Tirmek: She is. However she was also my mother before she reincarnated.

Atia: Well technically I was his father but same difference.

Sarah: :OMG!

Atia: So have you pierced Sarah yet?

Tirmek: What!?

Sarah: Pardon me!

Atia: You know! Shoved her the longsword! Jabbed her the claw! Slipped her the tail!

Sarah: EXCUSE ME!

Atia: How else is she going to know you are to obey her if you haven't stabbed her a few times.

Sarah: OH!

Atia: So have you stuck your maleness in her too?

Sarah: NO!

Atia: if you like being a girl more than a boy Tirmek then I have this happy new slave whose about your age and very well endowed for his ag...

Tirmek: NO! Atia for the last time, I don't want to be involved in the politics of the Lords of Dust!

Atia: I know Tirmek and I respect that.

Tirmek: Thank you.

Atia: You have to throw us all off by lying about your brilliant plans to slaughter your rivals before killing dozens of lower ranking nobles in order to ascend to full Rakashasadom!

Tirmek: :twitch:

Atia: That's why you went to the forgotten freedom isn't it?

Tirmek: It is not!

Atia: Yes it is! I saw it on my crystal ball. You're going gather all the shards of the sacred jewel in order to become a full demon while your evil brother Tirmekshomoru....

Tirmek: That's INYUASHA!

Atia: Oh sorry, I get all those confused. *waves her wand to give Tirmek cat ears that she feels*

Tirmek: Sigh.

Atia: Sit boy!

*Waves wand and Tirmek SLAMS into the ground*

Atia: Here's a present Sarah! Remember, Tirmek loves to be dominated and controlled! If he rebels vigorously punish him!

Tirmek: I do not!

Atia: In any case, here's the portal to your party. That new slave is making all the arrangements. He has such a cute flowery name.

Tirmek: :nonono: Lilly, you didn't...

Atia: They'll be gold, courtesans, dancing heliophants, and discussion of who the persons responsible for the mysterious rash of mass murderered Demons is! We suspect a group of plucky adventurers infiltrating us right under our nose!

Sarah: Is she serious?

Atia: I have no doubt that our security is in good hands with the party that wields huge amounts of crossbow bolts and other blessed projectile weapons.

Sarah: Oiye. Tirmek, do you want to save your family?

Tirmek: :shifty: Uh sure.....basically they'll be fine though. They'll see right through Lilly when he does something stupid.

***

Party

*Lilly and Aline are disguised as two geishas...for some reason*

Aline: Oh no! They caught us spiking the punch with Holy Water!

*Rakashasa guards advance*

Lilly: I know! We must distract them with Japanese River Dancing!

*a group of Sarlonan dancers suddenly appear in front of Lilly and Aline*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9fsDL24o8uM&mode=related&search=

*Rakashasas stare dumbfounded*

Lilly: It worked!
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-12-07, 03:50 PM		OOC: *sigh* :looloo:
Charles Phipps

01-12-07, 04:01 PM		Twas the Japanese river dancing that did it wasn't it?

;-)
rampant

01-12-07, 04:24 PM		Tirmek - This is precisley why my father was so insistant on marrying outside the noble clans.

Sarah - I can see why. Sister?

Tirmek - Most likely the bastard daughter from one of my father's Ack'Chazar or Low-blood cortesans.

Sarah - Atia?

Tirmek - I just don't want to know... remind me to chew Maladren out for letting them past. I want no part of this.

Sarah - *sniff* pot roast mmmmmmmmmm

Tirmek - Dammit!
-----------------------------------------------------------------

Maladren - (i.h.h. so humiliating! reduced to this! I'll have my revenge Lily!)

Pullo - Ah my sweet you dance so well, let us retire.

Maladren - Certainly my lord.

Later Maladren enters the party once more, with a slightly different disguise. Down the maze of castle walls and rooms a suspicious bundle is being tossed onto a cart with a half-dozen others and taken to the kitchens.
Paulon

01-12-07, 04:50 PM		Tirmek - This is precisley why my father was so insistant on marrying outside the noble clans.

Sarah - I can see why.

OOPaulon: These guys could breed Lily into their bloodline and get a 200% improvement in the average mental capacity of the family. Per child.
ratslinky

01-12-07, 08:18 PM		OORatslinky: Now that ive thought up what class race my new char will be i'm going to write them up

Mareth Anathemar Half-elf Artificer 10

Mareth was born to a poor family in Korvaire. From a young age she always wanted to know what made things tick her parents where forced to abandon her when the Forgotten Freedom blew up sharn for the 20th time. When a fireball got her right in the chest instead of dieing she somehow got transported to a demiplane full of gold and magic items. After filling 20 bags of holding with various forms of wealth she activated an item she thought would take her to wroat but it actually took her to One Eye with gold being so valuable there she was able to enroll and soon topped her class as an artificer winning skiff races and tournaments almost always in her class. She is currently 15 and without many friends as most of her class is jealous of her.
ratslinky

01-12-07, 08:22 PM		Caralot: Lets see some of Lilly's genes combined with some some rakashas genes :evillaugh soon I will create a new race of rakashas to take over the world

Kanatash: Thats nice honey :whatsthis
Paulon

01-12-07, 08:31 PM		OOPaulon: Just so long as they don't wind up having to try to beat Doog Jr at a wisdom contest.
Charles Phipps

01-12-07, 08:37 PM		Doog Junior: Doog want puppy.

Elina: Why are you looking at me like that?

Doog Junior: PUPPY GIRL!
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-12-07, 09:14 PM		Carolat: …………
OOC: Caralot. http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Caralot. It's like "Carealot", only no one ever got that joke.
Charles Phipps

01-12-07, 09:25 PM		I always got it.

Care Bears.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-12-07, 10:05 PM		It's like "Carealot", only no one ever got that joke.OOC: THAT'S what the joke was?! I thought either I'd missed it or you forgot to tell us.

IC:

Doog Jr.: hug!

Elina: Hold Person

Doog Jr.: *falls over, stiff as a board*

-----

Tirmek: How do I get myself into these kind of situations?

After the 8th time Sarah had been hit on, the 15th time she had been asked if she was sleeping with Tirmek yet, and the 20th time Tirmek had been propositioned by his own relatives, the two had returned to Kahuna Drop. Sarah had requested they take a moment to just rest after the excitement of the party, and had fallen asleep right next to him as she hugged him.

Sarah: :zzz:

Tirmek: Maybe if I move her arm I can-

Sarah: :zzz: Grrrrr... :zzz:

Tirmek: Maybe not.

*several minutes later*

Tirmek: Almost...there...

He has managed to almost completely extricate himself from Sarah's grip without disturbing her. Unfortunately, just as he slipped out, Sarah yawned, grabbed him, and pulled him to her again.

Tirmek: Dammit... She sleeps like a freaking log. She won't wake up, even if I yell. Shaking her just gets me growled at. I just hope she doesn't start having bad dreams.

He always knew Sarah hadn't slept well when she looked tired and Elina was in bandages. Part of the reason he was so careful. Even asleep she was scarily strong. Probably moreso because she wasn't restraining herself.

Tirmek: It's getting really late. Think, Tirmek, think!

At this time, Sarah nuzzles up under his chin, looking rather happy.

Tirmek: *sigh*

-----

The next morning, Tirmek awakes to find himself back at his home. Something is amiss, though, as a certain blue-haired wolf-girl is still clinging to him.

Tirmek: Oh hell... (i.h.h.) Ok, how'd I get back? What happened? I didn't do anything, did I? All our clothes are still on, that's a good sign...

Lisa: Finally woke up, huh?

Tirmek: :gel:

The sudden flash clues him in to what's going on.

Terra: :D That was priceless!

Ketty: *holding a camera* :) I'll get you a copy. Poster size?

Terra: :D Definitely.

Lisa: You fell asleep. Ketty brought you back, but Sarah wouldn't let go. It was just too cute not to mess with you. :D

Tirmek: :mad: You're all evil.

Sarah: :zzz:
Charles Phipps

01-12-07, 10:21 PM		Rakashasa Party

Lilly: *amongst a mass of corpses* Well THAT was a bust. Not one Tirmek amongst them.

Maladren: They're disgustingly happy aren't they?

Lilly: Yes. Which annoys me to all get out.

Yuan: Can't you be happy for a change?

Lilly: You know, here's a newsflash doormat. No one likes you.

Yuan: What?

Lilly: You're safe and predictable along with being an emotional anchor but do you do ANYTHING for yourself! NO!

Yuan: You're the paladin!

Lilly: Which shows what a freak you are! I swear, you're like everything my brother used to be before he lost his soul and went all crazy.

*Ivy walks by in high heels*

Lilly: Le Sigh. Which is Aundairese for The Sigh.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-12-07, 10:42 PM		Elina: SEE?! Even he agrees with me!

Yuan: I'm...disappointing you?

Elina: Yuan...honey. You're a wonderful guy. You're sweet, caring, and oh so very yummy...

Yuan: :embarrass

Elina: *wipes off drool* But you need to live it up more. Have some fun!

Yuan: *pause* ...as you wish.

Elina: *wags her finger* No, no, no... You're the one who needs to want to do this. What would you like to do first?

Yuan: Well...there is one thing...

Elina: Yes?

Yuan: W.A.F.F.L.E. is always looking for volunteers. Why don't we go help?

Elina: :confused: W.A.F.F.L.E.?

Yuan: 'We Aren't France, For the Love of Eberron'. They're a non-profit working with the citizens of Aundair to break their habit of surrendering at the drop of a hat. They're perpetually understaffed and haven't made much headway.

Elina: :nonono: *sigh*
rampant

01-12-07, 10:44 PM		Tirmek - Down to one, I'll have to buy more cards. Oof!

Elina - Eesh! drawing tiamat for the price card.

Tirmek - :bored: Ok yuan just played Bahamut, so I'll complete my red dragon flight, and filch one of your cards Elina.

Elina - Why me?

Tirmek - That was yuan's last move, this way I can still cut your options.

Elina - Fraggin cat.

Tirmek - Also ten from both of you for the color flight.

Yuan - Are you sure he's not cheating?

Elina - No *sigh*, he really is this good.

Sarah - :zzz:

Elina - Of course Sarah can beat him, but she's conked out.
luna18moon

01-12-07, 11:05 PM		Mittens: :rolleyes: So play like us.
Mittens is silently conversing with a dead ancestor who had just patrolled the perimeter (and sneaked looks at other's cards), Rip and Tear are reading minds, and Shred is trying to sense what they'll play next. As usual, Shred loses.
Shred: DARNIT, WHY'D I HAVE TO GET A SUCKY POWER????
Mittens: The best part is, he doesn't even notice when Crea replaces his best cards. :evillaugh
ratslinky

01-12-07, 11:43 PM		OORatslinky: Sorry for the bad naming Cat i'll fix that up now I can never remember if it Caralot or Carolat


*Gaz is wondering thru one eye academy looking for an artificer named Mareth. As he walks thru the area that has lots of labs'n'stuff when he see a girl screwing something onto a machine *

Gaz: Excuse me could you please direct to the artificer Mareth i've heard she's one of the best hear

Mareth: That would be me

Gaz: Pleased to meet you Mareth I have heard you have come up with so many things to top your class that you have run out of ideas

Mareth: I wouldn't say that but I am stumped at the moment

Gaz: Well i've thought up something but I lack the technical expertise I have classes right now but if your interested we could discuss it over lunch

Mareth: Well I can't think of any inventions so any insperation would be nice
Charles Phipps

01-13-07, 12:03 AM		OOC: Not the Forgotten Freedom but a real incident from my Realms campaign. It's funnier if you know anything about the Moonblade obsession some players have.

IC:

Akkanas Lighthope: AT LAST! MY FAMILY'S MOONBLADE!

*An avatar of Corellon Larethian appears*

Corellon: Noble Paladin and Ranger of the Seldarine! I beseech you! Do not pick up the Sword of the Lighthopes!

Akkanas: But why Lord Divinity? *kneels*

Corellon: Such a blade is not made for you. It would strike dead a most worthy and noble champion whose self sacrifice and deeds are enough to resound through the ages.

Akkanas: But why Lord?

Corellon: Because it is a Moonblade.

Akkanas: And?

Corellon: What do you mean AND? It's made for Moon Elves!

Akkanas: Well I understand that but...

Corellon: You're a Gold Elf.

Akkanas: That's true but...

Corellon: A HALF-Gold elf.

Akkanas: With all due respect Lord of Elves, that's terribly racist of you.

Corellon: I *MADE* the subraces. I think I know what's races and not.

Akkanas: Sorry, sorry. It's just I've rather travelled a long way here and it seems a bit unsporting that after this epic quest that I'm not going to get a moonblade.

Corellon: Well should you marry a Moon Elf then certainly your descendents should potentially be able to wield it.

Akkanas: Uh....huh. Sir, out of respect, what have I done to transgress against you?

Corellon: Nothing Ak, you've been a constant supporter and champion of the elves despite their treatment of you from day one. I count thee both a worthy ally and friend.

Akkanas: So can't we make a teensy weensy exception here?

Corellon: NO! Do you know what being Lord of the Elves means?

Akkanas: No milord.

Corellon: It means not having to bend your rules that clearly state that Moonblades are for moon elves!

Akkanas: Do I need to slay Lolth? Cause if this is a question of not being legendary enough then I can head up to the Demonweb Pits. It may take a while to get strong enough but her or the Elf Eater...

Corellon: It's the Sword of KINGS. The blade used to pick a ruler for the city-states of the Elves, Evermeet, Cormanthor, Everveska, and so on. Just because you're unable to wield it doesn't mean you're not every bit my Champion.

Akkanas: So I have to be more Kingly?

Corellon: No.

Akkanas: If this is a magical thing. I can get a wizard to turn me into a Moon Elf. Ten minutes. He's right through the bushes...

Corellon: NO!

Akkanas: I'm trying to be flexible here Sir.

Corellon: Ak, I'm a very busy god. The fact you helped slay the Dark Triad and save the entire world from Ao's wrath is buying you more than my normal few seconds that most priests would tear their own elvish eyeballs out for. You want to be my Chosen? Do you want MY sword? Cause I'm willing to grant you either.

Akanas: I certainly wouldn't turn down either it's just that I really want to impress Amauril's eldest daughter so that she can look beyond my half-elvishness and a Moonblade really is rather a spiffy thing...

Corellon: Look how they treat Arilyn Moonflower. Do you think a Moonblade helped her?

Akkanas: Well Arilyn the Half-Elf....

Corellon: Ak, are you starting?

Akkanas: No sir.

Corellon: Cause you sound like you're starting.

Akkanas: NO SIR!

Corellon: Take the damn sword! *hands over his blade*

Akkanas: I am in your eternal debt!

Corellon: You'd be dead from a divine blast right now if not for the fact that this isn't the FIRST time I've had this conversation! I swear, I think I'm going to have to make a fricking set of Sun Bows just to distract people from it.

Akkanas: Could I wield one of those?

Narrator: You awaken in a crater where you feel tremendous agony.....it's twenty four hours later and the crater is ten feet deep....
rampant

01-13-07, 12:39 AM		Ivy - Um Hello? I'm looking for Elina.

Gisen ( Healer/Psion(psychometabolism)) - You and every young girlseeker on the island kid.

Ivy - No! Yuan's got himself stuck in the mast again.

Gisen - Try the gym, or the plain court. That way, and left past the burgerjoint.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

:detect: for the first person to remember Gisen
cypher_zero

01-13-07, 02:27 AM		He's that guy! That did the thing! You know... The thing...
.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-13-07, 08:23 AM		:detect: for the first person to remember Gisen
OOC: Illis and Tenda's son. Came aboard for the Satnak/Serene wedding.

Google, so I don't deserve a :detect:.
rampant

01-13-07, 12:47 PM		Tirmek - Well as nice as this is, i need to go to the bathroom.

Sarah - :zzz:
Kaizer_Ryu

01-13-07, 01:07 PM		Sarah: *yawn* Huh...?

Tirmek: Finally! *takes off* Bathroom, where's a bathroom?!

Elina: It's about time. What did you do? It's almost noon.

Sarah: I was having this really nice dream where I was holding onto a Tirmek plushie...

Elina: :nonono:

Sarah: Now my head hurts. Can I go back to the dream?

Elina: Come on. We still have homework to do, and I am not studying in the same room as you till you get cleaned up.
rampant

01-13-07, 02:04 PM		Ivy - wow

Row upon row of exercise machines, many with obvious energitic enhancements for durability, most are in use. A Xeph is doing his level best to overheat a stair machine. A large Orc is maxing out an arm curl machine. On the similar machine to the left, what appears to be a young red dragon is curling about 3/4s that much.

Y.R.D. - (stops and gets up) Hello? new kid?

Ivy - (very intimidated) um, no just looking for Elina. You see Yuan got his head stuck in the mast again?

Y.R.D. - ... Take plushie?

Ivy - Huh?

The scaly one is offering a red dragon plushie.

Ivy - Sure, .. thanks *takes plushie* (i.h.h. cra-zy)

Y.R.D. - What name?

Ivy - I'm Ivy.

Y.R.D. - Hyrd

Upon closer inspection Hyrd is not a red-dragon but a half red-dragon, with overwhelming draconic traits. Wings, tail, horns the whole schpeal.

Ivy - I'm looking for E-li-na. Her friend is stuck in the mast again.

---------------------------------------------------------------------
Yuan - Could someone please get me down? its cold up here.
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Hyrd - E-li-na ... Pink fox?

Ivy - Close enough.

Hyrd - Pink fox and Blue wolf, like practice outside.

Ivy - Thank you (turns)

Hyrd - ... HUGGLES

Ivy - ak
rampant

01-13-07, 02:18 PM		Teiza - Corre!

Corre - Hey sis-oof!

Terrek - How are you Corre?

Corre - GRanpa!

Terrek - Yes, your mother has to teach, and someone needed to watch Dorvos. He's found another one of those shape wood wands.

Teiza and Corre - :evillaugh:

Terrek - (i.h.h. they're so cute when they're maniacle)
Charles Phipps

01-13-07, 03:35 PM		Ketler: So did you feel any better after slaughtering most of Tirmek's family?

Lilly: Not really. Though damnit if some aren't hard to kill.

*Lilly jabs a blessed arrow into the back of Julius Rakashaesar. There looks to be twenty or thirty sticking out of him*

Julius: Etu Lilly?

Pullo: Eh, they'll all reincarnate anyway but it does reduce the breeding pool even further.

***

Banjo Rakashasa: He yuck.

***

Lilly: I am tragically mourning the death of my beloved Aline.

Maladren: She was a figment of Elina's consciousness!

Lilly: Yes, but slain nevertheless.

Maladren: That's because Elina went to sleep and she disappeared!

Lilly: Woe. In any case Ketler, i want you to bring me an Elina from another world!

Ketler: WOOT!

*Powers up a machine specifically built for this purpose*

Lilly: I'm disturbed you already have one of these.

Ketler: I used the leftover parts from when you journeyed to Earth in order to kill Hitler.

Lilly: Uhhh...the less said about that adventure the better.

Ketler: Who knew Jarlot was a Jewish film maker on Earth!

Lilly: GET WITH IT!

*Ketler powers up the Elina-machine*

*POOF*

Elinagome: GASP! I've been transported into the Universe of the Four Gods!

Lilly: Not exactly girl in school uniform.

Elinagome: Then I've been transported into Feudal Japan!

Lilly: Nope!

Elinagome: Ancient Mythological China?

Lilly: Not quite.

Elinagome: A universe where I must assume giant suits of armor to fight a Dark Knight?

Lilly: No.

Elinagome: Where nobles duel in similiar giant suits of magical armor.

Lilly: Geez louweez no.

Elinagome: Well I'm sure I'll find my dark and handsome bishounen warrior here somewhere.

Lilly: Well I happen....

Yuan: Lilly, I...

Elinagome: SQUEEEEEEEEE! :love:

*GLOMP*

Ketler: LILLY! YOU'RE THE OTHER LOVE INTEREST!

Lilly: OH HELL NO!

***

Elinagome
Expert 1

Elina is every Anime schoolgirl whom has gone to another land. She has the special ability of being the most important person in the universe and loved by all...at least she's supposed to.
rampant

01-13-07, 04:18 PM		Dorvos - Ha ha heyaah! *left * right * spin *

Teiza - Grr I hate that kick combo *parry * block * Stop *

Corre - heads up *thump*thud*

Teiza - Ouch! Whatch the quarterstaff!

Dorvos - Hmmmmm :P
----------------------------------

Ivy - gah!

Hyrd - *squeeze*
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-13-07, 04:46 PM		Elinagome: [description of various animé worlds]
Caralot: Yeah, I know, this one doesn't have any frighteningly cute monsters.

Silver: However it does not lack elves with giant ears. :D
Elinagome: SQUEEEEEEEEE! :love:

*GLOMP*

Ketler: LILLY! YOU'RE THE OTHER LOVE INTEREST!

Lilly: OH HELL NO!
Squirrel chorus: Oh it's baaaaaaaaaad luck to be youuuuuuuuu………

Silver: You think this'll work?

13: Possible: Yuan gets so fed up with Elinagome that he starts going out with Elina just to get away from her.

Bunny: And of course, should that not work you now have the ultimate catalyst of chaos aboard.

13: :devil:
Charles Phipps

01-13-07, 04:55 PM		Lilly: :twitch:

Emperor Hotahori: Really Lilly, being the beta love interest isn't so bad...

*Elinaogme follows Yuana*

Elinagome: Oh Yuana....

Lilly: :twitch:

Koga: I don't know what you're talking about, Kagome is in love with me obviously.

Elinagome: Yuana! Wait up for me!

Nuriko: Just profess your love as you die! It won't get you the girl but you'll leave an impression! Oh and you have to cross dress first.

Ivy: I like this plan already!

Elinagome: YUUUNNNNNAAAAAAAAAAA!

Yuana: I DON'T LIKE YOU!

Elinagome: That's what all the bishounen say!

Yuana: GO OR I'LL KILL YOU!

Elinagome: That only makes me fall MORE in love with you!

Lilly: :twitch:
rampant

01-13-07, 05:37 PM		Elina - I wish you two the best of luck.

Ivy - What the hell?

Sarah - It's good to see you've gotten over that whole Tirmek. I didn't want have to skin you alive.

Hyrd - Hyrd get Ivy. *squeeze*

Ivy - :mymy:

Hyrd - Ivy come say Yuan stuck in mast.

Elina - Not again!
*dashes off*

Sarah - You two are so cute together.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-13-07, 06:22 PM		Elinagome: Yuan! Come down my love!

Yuan: *atop the mast* Stay away from me, crazy lady!

Elina: *flying* Need a lift?

Yuan: Oh, thank goodness!

Elina: Here, hold on to this.

They begin flying away, Yuan carrying a large Bag of Holding.

Elinagome: :weep: NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! :weep:

Yuan: Where are we going?

Elina: Since my options are limited as far as where I can go, I found the perfect place to have fun, just the two of us.

Yuan pulls out a parka and a ski boot.

Yuan: ...I've never been to Frostfell before. What about your parents?

Elina: I left a note. They'll know where to find us if they want to.
Charles Phipps

01-13-07, 06:31 PM		OOcharles: Ugh. You, Death!

Bunny: Hmm?

OOcharles: Kill Yuan!

Bunny: I don't do requests

OOCharles: Listen, I can't TAKE IT ANYMORE. I can't stand to see Elina happy anymore with that guy and it's driving me up the wall.

Silver: Go play some Twilight Princess.

OOCharles: I already beat it and Final Fantasy 12 was too hard :cries:

Silver: Sigh. What do you have against their happiness anyway?

OOcharles: Because it's fundamentaly artificial and mean spirited.

Silver: You're not ditching the idea that Yuan is evil are you?

OOcharles: I feel sorry for Lilly outright that Elina frankly doesn't deserve him.

13: WOW, that's low.

OOcharles: Think about it. The guy pines for her for five years despite the fact she dumps him for a guy that just acts like the ideal fellow. It's....unseemly and frankly despicable.

Silver: Okay...

OOCharles: I need to go write some fanfic where he dies...

Silver: At last, Forgotten Freedom has become like a true Geek Icon.
rampant

01-13-07, 07:44 PM		Bunny - I'm death! How long have we been hanging around? Its a monty python reference for Bakerssakes!
-------------------------------------------------------------

Corre - I'm back!

Momo - Uh oh!

Scias - R-r-r-r-r.....run!

Dies - Yay!

Nina - You will not-
---------------------------

Momo - Where did she learn to do Anduarian braids?

Scias - (i.h.h. Why do they always use the coconut shampoo, I smell like baked seafood)

Nina - I don't care how cute you think it looks, NO PIGTAILS!
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-13-07, 07:54 PM		OOC: Update: Charles edited post.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-13-07, 07:55 PM		Nina - ……………NO PIGTAILS!
Aussie Professor: No pooftas.

Announcer guy: And that…was something…completely different.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-13-07, 08:15 PM		OOKaizer: Of course it's mean spirited and artificial. But the rest of you'll have to wait to figure out exactly how mean spirited till I finish with the next two arcs. And I think OOCharles got a bit mixed up due to rage induced confusion.

-----

Yuan: Ow. Oh. Ow. Ow. Oh. Oh. Ow. Oh. Ow.

Elina: Oh, come on. That wasn't so bad.

Yuan: Oh, no, I had fun. I'm just not used to that much activity in this kind of cold. Skiing has a way of making you hurt in strange places. I'm just gonna sit here for a moment, ok?

Elina: *ears perk up* You may not have a choice...

A haunting voice carries over the slopes. A giggling, almost gleeful laughter that sounds vaguely familiar yet completely alien.

???: *from nowhere dicernable* So you noticed me, my dear?

Elina: Where are you? Who are you?

???: You don't recognize my voice? Oh, my darling, I'm hurt...

A mass of shadows forms a few feet away, forming into a humanoid shape. Features other than body shape are indistinguishable, as no light escapes from the darkness the strange being is composed of.

???: Elina...flesh of my flesh. Blood of my blood. Heir of my power. ...my darling daughter.

The familiar tone suddenly had a face to it. This was Terra. But that made no sense. This had to be a faker. There was no denying the power, but the aura was totally different. Pure, unmitigated evil.

Elina: You are not my mother. That much is obvious. Why even bother with such a charade?

Yuan: Elina...it is not just her. *points*

Behind the shadow figure appear several more figures. All humanoid in appearance, but made of the same shadowmatter as the first.

Terra?: Ah, there you are. How are preparations?

???: *female voice, also familiar* All is as you ordered, mistress. We are alone.

Terra?: Good, good. Well done, Lisa.

???: *male voice* Ahem.

Terra?: Yes, yes. You too, Michael.

Yuan: What do you want?

Terra?: I merely wish to speak with what could have been my daughter.

Lisa?: Mine as well, apparently. That would have been an honor, mistress. *bows*

Terra?: Had we still the capacity for children, I might consider it.

Michael?: :mad: When I agreed to be your thrall, I didn't think it'd preclude sex and drinking.

Terra?: That's what you get for not reading the fine print. Now quiet.

Elina: What the hell are you people? Alternates?

Terra?: In a manner of speaking. We escaped from your Entities head while he was unconscious from the repeated DM Breaker hits. I am what your mother would have been had she not escaped the Plane of Shadow.

Elina: Huh... Well, as nice as that is, We're going to leave now. I know what happens around Alternates.

Terra?: Michael.

In seconds, Yuan is imprisoned by Michael in his shadow form. No sound escapes the cage, but he can be seen trying to escape.

Terra?: I'm afraid we can't allow that. See, we have no place here. We struck a deal with the Chamber, though. In exchange for eliminating you, we get sent to an Eberron of our choice. No hard feelings, but that's business.

The feelings of malevolent joy said otherwise. Elina had long wondered why the Dragons had not made a move against her other than denying her safe passage throughout the world. Seems they had merely been biding their time till she was in a more vulnerable position.

Elina: Great. Just :censored: ing great. I don't suppose we could make a deal, huh?

Terra?: Nope.

Lisa?: Shall I, mistress?

Terra?: As you wish.

OOC: Next part after dinner.
Charles Phipps

01-13-07, 08:15 PM		Actually, there's a typo where Bunny gives a rebuttal and Silver pops in. I had 13 say something too but I apparently forgot it. I seem to have accidentally used the Silver C&P of the name for all the characters.

My bad.

I was writing a chapter and distracted.

Edited: There we go
cypher_zero

01-13-07, 08:31 PM		*shadowy people and stuff*
OOcypher: SEE! This is why I don't show my face around here! (dodges DM breaker blast)

Terrek: (dressed as rambo) Shuddup. *blast*

OOcypher: RUN!!!
.
ratslinky

01-13-07, 08:49 PM		*Gaz and Mareth over lunch*

Gaz: So what do you think?

Mareth: Interesting I might as well give it a try but you'll have to get the blood for it

Gaz: Don't worry it'll be easy

*Later*

*Tirmek is walking thru the gardens when he feels a prick in the back of his neck. He moves his hand to the back of his neck where he finds a dart he pulls it out and looks at it*

Tirmek: Oh :censored: *He falls unconcious*

*A dark figure walks up to him takes out a syringe and draws some blood then stands up and disapears*

OORatslinky: I'll do the rest later but now i'm going for a swim
ratslinky

01-13-07, 09:33 PM		Gaz: Here's the blood

Mareth: Thanks i've got everything else *casts some infusions and stuff* there done i'll take notes of the effects

Gaz: Thanks have you got the bolt

Mareth: Yeah here yah go

*Later*

*Tirmek and Sarah are walking thru some garden on the way to the arena when Sarah gets hit by a bolt in the arm and she feels a fluid going into her system*

Tirmek: Huh who's there? *He doesn't see anyone*

Sarah: *Pulls out the bolt* we'd better get to the arena we can get the medic to check on me their

Tirmek: Okay

*Later at the arena*

Medic: Nothing seems wrong with you your outsider heritage must have protected you

Sarah: Oh good Tirmek lets go spar now

Gaz: *with Mareth in tow* lemonade Sarah? I've got some fruit juice for you Tirmek

Both: Sure

*Sarah drinks her drink*

Sarah: Huh whats happening *she becomes like Tirmek after a glass of lemonade*

Tirmek: *Trying to restrain Sarah* Ok Gaz what did you do?

Gaz: *Innocent look* Nothing

Tirmek: Gaz i'm a telepath and your blocking your thoughts what did you aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh *Sarah starts dragging him around the room*

Mareth: We used the essence of you in a potion to make her go hyper when she drank sugar don't worry it will where off after a couple of minutes

OORatslinky: Sorry to rampant and Kaizer if I displayed Tirmek and Sarah badly I just had to do it for my story now on with the post

IC:

Mareth: I think this is the best invention yet nightsticks for barbarians
Paulon

01-13-07, 09:43 PM		OOcypher: SEE! This is why I don't show my face around here! (dodges DM breaker blast)

Terrek: (dressed as rambo) Shuddup. *blast*

OOcypher: RUN!!!

I just make sure I'm not funny enough to bother blasting. :)
Kaizer_Ryu

01-13-07, 10:21 PM		Elina: (i.h.h.) She's not your Momma. She's an alternate. An evil alternate at that. Momma would do that same thing...wouldn't she?

The Shadow Lisa strikes out with blinding fury. The combination of expert swordplay and shadow power was formidable. From fighting against Sarah so often, she new how to parry shadowmatter based moves, but she seemed unable to access her powers effectively.

Terra?: :devil: Oh, I should mention to you that I'm currently in control of your flow of shadowmatter. It's your bad luck your Mom isn't aware of this.

Elina: Yet.

After dodging a flurry of blows, she counters with a spell combo. A hail of water-infused mindblade shurikens soaks the shadow, followed by a lightning spear. The stun allowed her enough time to entangle the shadow in an ice whip, freezing her in place. Elina then heard clapping off to the side.

Terra?: Well done. Well done my dear. Seems you have a bit of power even without your unique skills. But don't count her out yet.

The ice shatters and the shadow mockery of her Momma reforms.

Lisa?: You should know well enough that we're pretty much immortal in these forms...

Elina: Unfortunately for you, I'm also aware of a fatal flaw in your use of it.

Terra?: Interesting...lets see if you can back that up.

The shadow forms of both her mothers attack at once. The combination was nearly overwhelming, but neither seemed as powerful as her true parents. That much was clear when she emerged victorious from the first altercation.

Yuan could only watch as Elina was batted about like a kite in a storm. She was knocked face first into the snow, standing up only to be struck with a gout of flame. The two were relentless, scarcely allowing her time to breathe between attacks. Through ice walls, down a canyon, narrowly missing the avalanche they created, followed by a hail of stalagtites and boulders. Bleeding and bruised, she managed to stand again only to witness a terrifying sight. A wave of pure shadow energy, to her eyes looking like an infinite number of blades, homing in on her. She took to the skies, hoping to escape the deadly onslaught, but the wave followed her. She twisted and turned, ignoring the pain coursing through her body in a desperate bid to survive.

It was then that she saw the shadow Terra, deep in concentration. The shadow Lisa was nowhere to be seen. Elina knew that breaking her concentration would end the spell. She had an idea for ending this in one blow, but that depended on these creatures powers functioning in the same fashion as her mother's had before the evolution. By now, she was a fair distance in front of the wave. She would have just enough time to see if she was right...or dead. Infusing pure light magic into both her mindblades, she jammed one into the shadow's head and the other into her heart. The shock was palpable, if not visible. The wave began to dissipate, but not fast enough. Light energy began piercing the surface of the shadow, overloading it and causing her form to destablize.

Just as the final throes began to set in, shadow Lisa burst from the wave. Elina screamed in terrible pain as her right arm was severed at the shoulder. At this time, the shadow Terra burst apart in a blaze of light, sending Elina flying out of the path of the disintegrating wave of shadow energy. It engulfed the shadow Lisa, but not before Elina saw her form writhing in pain. When it passed, both were gone.

Elina desperately tried to stop the bleeding, hoping that the effects of the shadow Terra's influence would wear off and allow her to regenerate quickly. Her arm was gone as well, consumed in the last bits of energy of the wave. In a way, she had been fortunate. The blast would have sent her right into the wave had she still been holding on with both hands.

Yuan arrived as soon as he could. When shadow Terra had been destroyed, shadow Michael had also been destroyed. He immediately started bandaging her up. She stopped him when he tried to cover where her arm used to be.

Elina: It'll come back...

Yuan: You seem less than certain. Please, you're losing a lot of blood.

Elina: Just give it a mome- *wince* ugh...

Shadowmatter coaleced around the wound, stopping the blood loss and forming into the shadow of an arm. However, nothing more happened. Elina worredly lifted her new arm, flexing it, hoping it would truly regenerate. But it didn't happen.

Yuan: What does this mean?

Elina: ...I need to talk to Mom.
DungeonJman

01-13-07, 10:46 PM		Oh, great.


This is all my fault, i'd better explain my part in this as well. Wait a minute, does that mean that Yuan...? Meh, not something i should worry about. But for the confirmed alternates, they are MY mistake, so if i can't do anything about it, it's my responsibility to get the full truth to the people who can. So let me think, since they're alternate versions of Terra, Michael, and Lisa that were in OOKaizer's head, that means that he must know what their abilities and the aftereffects of them are and since they're not fully developed, it may be possible to shove them back into his head or something.
rampant

01-13-07, 11:57 PM		Teiza - Elina!

Elina - How did you get here?

Teiza - That much shadow being tossed about? how could I not? and you're bladeweaving ain't exactly stealthy.

Sarah - WHAT THE HELL!

Tirmek - Someone dies for this.

Teiza - I've never seen him angry before.

------------------------------------------------------

Chamber councillor - Is it just me or did it just it just get colder in here?

Bunny - Don't mind me:D
Paulon

01-14-07, 12:07 AM		The Forgotten Freedom never has gotten around to trashing Argonnessen yet.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-14-07, 12:53 AM		OOC: Oh, they're gone. As far as you know, at least.

IC:

Elina: Sorry, Tirmek. I lost the glove with the arm.

Tirmek: That's not the point!

Sarah: What about your arm!

Elina: ...I don't know...

Yuan: Where is Mrs. Branford?

Sarah: She collapsed about five minutes ago. Said something like "she's here" and just fell over.

As Elina's bones mended themselves, she stood up. Her clothes were pretty much ruined from the blood, dirt, and ripping, but aside from her arm, her body would retun to normal in an hour or so.

Teiza: It was weird. I've never seen sensei turn pale like that. I felt a little twinge in the shadow energies, but Sarah picked up the location right away.

Sarah: Momma's really worried. We need to get back as fast as possible. Gimmie your hands.

With everyone in contact, Sarah takes them through the Plane of Shadow to the FF.

-----

Lisa: :( Why did you go off like that? Lay on Hands

Elina: I can't go anywhere, Momma. I'm more or less stuck here and at the Academy. I...*sigh* I thought maybe we could go somewhere and I could forget about my troubles for just a few hours...

Terra lies on the bed, still out. Her color has returned and her breathing has regulated, but she still doesn't wake. Lisa had sent the others out of the room, trying to give them both a chance to rest.

Lisa: Honey...

Elina: You can yell at me if you like. Ground me. Go ahead. It's not like this is much different. I'm a prisoner in a very large cage.

Lisa: *shakes her head* I'm not going to yell. I know how you feel. I nearly went stir crazy at the convent I grew up in. I know it's not the same...I just want you to know I'm just glad you're alive...

Terra: Let me see your arm.

Elina: Mom!

Lisa: Are you ok?

Terra: *sitting up* Please, let me see your arm.

Elina sets her shadow arm in her mothers hand. Terra felt all around, but could feel little difference from her original arm. If it was truly made from only Shadowmatter, she should have been able to manipulate its form easily. The best she got was some warping.

Elina: How did you know I lost it?

Terra: ...I saw her. I saw you through her eyes. I could hear her thoughts. So many voices...so much agony... *shakes her head to clear it* I was able to help you in some small way. I rendered her unable to access the others.

Lisa: Others?

Terra: I told you before that I was intended to be a vessel to combine the energies of some of the most powerful creatures in the world. This was an alternate that had fulfilled that role. Countless Demons, Fiends, Quori, Rakshasa, and even the Rajahs of old. All bound in a single creature. An attempt to ascend to godhood that was thwarted only by never coming into existance...

Elina: ...is she gone? For good, I mean. No body means no confirmation of death.

Terra: I have no idea. I no longer sense her, but that means little. She's been in this world for four years, but hid her presense completely. I'll look into it further now that I have a power signature. Just...don't go running off again.

Elina: Right back in the cage...

Terra: Till I learn more, please. Just humor me...
DungeonJman

01-14-07, 12:59 AM		Arrrgh! Once again another post that makes me feel horrible for accidentally letting them out in the first place.

Teiza: You forgot to switch on the internal monologue this time.

DungeonJ: What?!?! I... Oh crud, this ain't gonna end well.
rampant

01-14-07, 02:05 AM		Momo - I'm finished!

Tirmek - Impressive

Sarah - How did you get mithral to bend like that?

Scias - :D
---------------------------------
Terrek - the pain :mymy:
-----------------------------------

Lisa - That's real sweet Momo, but i'm not sure if a replacement is necesary.
rampant

01-14-07, 12:58 PM		Tirmek - Cages don't just keep us in.

Elina - They keep the threats out. I know, but still...

Tirmek - I know... So um is that arm solidifying or is pure energitic?

Elina - Does it matter?

Tirmek - No matter how good you get at energitic there will still be people who can dispel or negate any pure energitic. If its solidifying into a true and connected biological and/or mechanical, it will be much more reliable. Also I won't have to put whole arm piece into the glove.

Elina - What glove?

Tirmek - The replacement of course. This shadow matter arm ought to channel better, you shoud be able to pull a lot of new tricks, and it would be a shame if you could only do it with one hand. I'm thinking Teiza could give me a hand, she's the only one I trust who can make midnight crystal. That's gonna be a must if you want to really get the most out of your new arm.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-14-07, 01:44 PM		Elina: *sigh*

Tirmek: What?

Elina: It's been hours, but... *lifts her arm*

Tirmek: You're still hoping it'll come back?

Elina: As you said, it could potentially be more useful...

Tirmek: But you like'd your real arm.

Elina: Yeah. I guess I'm just gonna have to get used to the idea. But to answer your question, I'm not sure what it's made of. It appears to be shadowmatter, but...see for yourself.

The worst part was the pulse. When he placed his hand on it, Tirmek could feel her heartbeat, the warmth of her skin, the same energy flow as that which coursed through the rest of her body...but there was no real surface. It was solid without weight, warm without heat, soft without touch.

Elina: It can do anything a normal arm can...as far as I know at least. Light doesn't effect it like most other shadow abilities. Mom's still doing some research, but this is new, even for her. For all intents and purposes, I should have a new arm when the old was destroyed.

Tirmek: It's not a good sign when the expert is stumped, huh?

Elina: Not really, no. As of right now, our best theory is that this is a memory, created by my body and subconscious. Perhaps, when the last seal breaks, it will truly regenerate, but there are no guarantees.

Tirmek: If that's the case, then you'll have this arm for a while, right? Are you aware of any mods I should make to the replacement glove?

Elina: Other than the midnight crystal, no. But seriously; Despite my experience with such things...this freaks me right the :censored: out.
rampant

01-14-07, 01:57 PM		Elina - Ok the support group I get, but why is there only one other person here?

Gil Hamilton - Because this is a somewhat creative plot twist.
--------------------------------------

:cookie: for whoever gets this first.
---------------------------------------------

Sarah - Tirmek! why does this lab smell like someone skinned a herd of gators?

Tirmek - I wanted to get as many posibilities as I could for Elina's glove, I figure I can let her chose one of these cuts, as the base before putting the expensive pieces on.

An array of dragon hides decorate the lab walls, many have hade several glove patterns cut frum them.

Sarah - Talk about your overdeveloped sense of revenge.
Crystalforged

01-14-07, 02:14 PM		Kanatash floats in a room with Nina, Deis, Scias, and Momo.

Kanatash: Alright you four, your mothers are kinda busy right now so I'm going to be keeping an eye on you. Now I understand you have a tendacy to get into places you're not supposed to and cause trouble. I all for a bit of chaos and destruction but it is my responisibility to make sure no harm comes to you so pay attention to what I tell you. If someone is going to cause mass destruction under my watch their going to do it right, Kyber take it.

Nina: (turning to Deis) He doesn't seem like a very good role model...

Deis: Really? I'm starting to like the way he talks.

Momo: (having ignored the entire rant) Ooooh. (waves her hand back and forth through Kanatash) :shifty: (pulls a ghost touch jar out of her back) I'll take a sample for later...

Kanatash: (glances around the room) Hmm... Wait a sec, where did Scias go? (goes stock still) :gel: Everything looks... normal...

Scias: :mymy: :twitch: :shocked: :gah: :hides: W-w-w-w-whoa...



OOC: Just so you know Scias stole Kanatash's perception of reality. To see what he sees copy and paste this,
javascript:R=0; x1=.1; y1=.05; x2=.25; y2=.24; x3=1.6; y3=.24; x4=300; y4=200; x5=300; y5=200; DI=document.getElementsByTagName(%22img% 22); DIL=DI.length; function A(){for(i=0; i-DIL; i++){DIS=DI[ i ].style; DIS.position='absolute'; DIS.left=(Math.sin(R*x1+i*x2+x3)*x4+x5)+ %22px%22; DIS.top=(Math.cos(R*y1+i*y2+y3)*y4+y5)+% 22px%22}R++}setInterval('A()',5); void(0);
into your adress bar and hit enter before going to the top of the page. :D
cypher_zero

01-14-07, 02:28 PM		Sarah - Tirmek! why does this lab smell like someone skinned a herd of gators?

Tirmek - I wanted to get as many possibilities as I could for Elina's glove, I figure I can let her chose one of these cuts, as the base before putting the expensive pieces on.

An array of dragon hides decorate the lab walls, many have hade several glove patterns cut from them.

Sarah - Talk about your overdeveloped sense of revenge.
Terrek: (Striding in) Over? I'd say the boy has just gotten started.

Tirmek: What are you doing here?

Terrek: Mind you manners child. I've had dealing with the dragons since before you were a twinkle in your mother's eye. Perhaps you didn't know it, but it was I that persuaded the Chamber to be so lenient with Elina. This was not them; at least not all of them. It seems we have a rouge group of them that thought they could pull this off.

Tirmek: So what do you want? What are you getting out of this?

Terrek: Do you know what souls taste like?

Tirmek: :eek:

Terrek: I suppose the best way to define it would be like a fine wine; the older the soul, the better the taste. Even a thousand years is young for a dragon and I’m suspecting that there are some considerably older ones involved. A thousand years is a long time for wine to cure, wouldn’t you say? So to answer your question, I’m ready for some fine dining…
Kaizer_Ryu

01-14-07, 03:18 PM		Kitsune: I offer my condolences for what happened, my dear.

Elina: I still have no desire to speak to you.

Kitsune: Come now, Elina. I only want to help you.

Elina: Bull :censored: ! You want to help you. I'm just the conduit.

Kitsune: ...it pains me to hear you say that. But if you wish to do this on your own, I will respect your decision. I will watch and wait. Should you want my assistance, I will be there.

Kitsune/Shadow fades from her mind as she arrives in the lab.

Elina: What's up? Oh, hi.

Terrek: "Oh, hi"? You didn't even notice me.

Elina: I've learned to block out the background noise. *to Tirmek* You called?

Tirmek: I figured you'd want to pick out the design before I start.

Sarah: That, and take out a little vengeance.

Elina: *looks at dragonhides* Eesh. No kidding. Well, let's see what you've got.
Charles Phipps

01-14-07, 04:30 PM		Commercial Break

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JARLOT PLUSHIES! ONLY 19.95! CUTE AND CUDDLY WITH A FLAG OF EVERY NATION OF EBERRON THAT HE WANTS TO CONQUER IN HIS HAND! COLLECT THEM ALL!

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MY NAME IS ROSE AND I ENDORSE THE DISPLACER BEAST BRAND OF LIGHTNING CARRIAGE!
rampant

01-14-07, 04:42 PM		Tirmek - Well I can get each of these cuts in at least ten colors, more for some of them.

First up is a standard cut similar to the old one. A fingerless glove with a focus in the palm in this case it would be a midnight crystal.

Next we have this pattern. Now it looks a bit -

Elina - Like Sarah's pillows after a full moon.

Sarah - Hey!

Tirmek - Well you see its held together by channel wires, its not really damaged. its just incomplete.

Ok this cut is a full glove, but it would be studded accross the knuckles once we get the crystals.

This one is a full arm glove that doubles as partial armor. The crystals would be here and here re-enforcing the scale armor.
Charles Phipps

01-14-07, 04:55 PM		OOC: Special thanks to Dork Tower.

Lilly: Tirmek, I want to apologize to you.

Tirmek: What?

Lilly: I've been cruel to you. Killing your entire family and all...

Tirmek: Well not my godlike father and the rest don't really count.

Lilly: Oh.

Tirmek: Go on.

Lilly: I've been really selfish and all so I wanted to make amends. It's time I stopped chasing Elina's ghost and made something of myself. Maybe just the King's Wands or something.

Tirmek: That's very mature.

Lilly: So I decided to get you a gift. It's hard thinking up gifts for Rakashasas...

Tirmek: We are the species that have everything.

Lilly: So I went on the net and got this RAKASHASA COAT!

Tirmek: AH!

Lilly: What? It's nice and fuzzy! look at the stripes...

Tirmek: YOU FOOL! RAKASHASA COATS ARE MADE *OF* RAKASHASAS NOT *FOR* THEM!

Lilly: Whoops.

Tirmek: Some of my people were skinned alive for that! There's no worse present in the world you could give!

Lilly: So Rakashasa pie....

*picks up one*

Tirmek: Uncle OWEN! AUNT BERU!
rampant

01-14-07, 05:03 PM		Ivy - HELP!

Hyrd - *squeeze*
-------------------------

Lily - Where's Ivy I haven't seen him around.

Elina - Oh probably out with Hyrd.

Lily - Hyrd?

Sarah - His new boyfriend.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-14-07, 05:20 PM		OOC: Poor Tirmek. I'd feel worse for him if his relatives weren't a bunch of scheming, backstabbing, pretentious, inbred, incompetent, powerhungry, evil bastards.

Maladren: HEY!

Present company excluded (mostly), of course.

IC:

Elina: If the crystals are able to channel the shadow energies as well, I'm gonna go for the full arm one. The armor function doesn't hurt either.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-14-07, 05:22 PM		Tirmek: Some of my people were skinned alive for that! There's no worse present in the world you could give!
Bunny: You sure you couldn't just wear it around the island?

Tirmek: Why in even your name would I do that? :mad:

Bunny: (holds up huge knife covered in blood) So I can get more orders and thus experiment with more ways to skin Rakshasas.
Lily - Hyrd?

Sarah - His new boyfriend.
Silver: At least I'm having success with one of those two. :rolleyes:
rampant

01-14-07, 05:27 PM		Tirmek - Thats precisely what midnight crystals do they are deepcrystal infused with shadowstuff. They'll boost your shadow control and your passive psionics. Now what color for the glove? Be aware midnight crystals only come in one color, midnight sky.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-14-07, 05:27 PM		OOC: Poor Tirmek. I'd feel worse for him if his relatives weren't a bunch of scheming, backstabbing, pretentious, inbred, incompetent, powerhungry, evil bastards.
OOC: Whereas his new family is a bunch of scheming, bickering, weirdbred, semi-competant, overpowered, chaotic bastards.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-14-07, 05:29 PM		OOC: Whereas his new family is a bunch of scheming, bickering, weirdbred, semi-competant, overpowered, chaotic bastards.OOC: Which is, of course, infinitely better. :D
rampant

01-14-07, 05:29 PM		OOC: Whereas his new family is a bunch of scheming, bickering, weirdbred, semi-competant, overpowered, chaotic bastards.

Tirmek - You forgot quite Insane.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-14-07, 05:37 PM		Tirmek - Thats precisely what midnight crystals do they are deepcrystal infused with shadowstuff. They'll boost your shadow control and your passive psionics. Now what color for the glove? Be aware midnight crystals only come in one color, midnight sky.
Elina: Gonna have to go with blue, then. The crystals should blend in.
Charles Phipps

01-14-07, 05:42 PM		OOC: HBO's Rome starts anew.

BTW, Tirmek as Augustus is my image of him. Sort of a really young Lex Luthor.

;-)
Kaizer_Ryu

01-14-07, 05:45 PM		Odd as it may seem, every time Tirmek and Lilly are in a scene together, all I can see is Strong Bad and Homestar (respectively).
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-14-07, 05:52 PM		Odd as it may seem, every time Tirmek and Lilly are in a scene together, all I can see is Strong Bad and Homestar (respectively).
OOC: After having watched so many of that site's cartoons, I don't think Tirmek is evil and cool enough to be Strong Bad.
Charles Phipps

01-14-07, 05:53 PM		OOC: Actually its a story of Young Jarlot.

:-)

If Tirmek and Lilly ever became obsessed with video games then they could be Tycho and Gabe.

http://www.penny-arcade.com/images/2007/20070112.jpg

But which is which?
Crystalforged

01-14-07, 06:11 PM		Considering Tycho is usually the more intelligent, levelheaded one with the occasionaly malevolent overtone while Gabe is more of a blissful idiot who somehow seems to win regaurdless I'm saying Tirmek and Lilly respecitively.
rampant

01-14-07, 07:07 PM		Tirmek - Ok then. Teiza give me a hand here.

Teiza - Why should I?

Tirmek - If you help, you can eat the dragons i've got locked in the fridge.

Teiza - :drool: lets go.
-----------------------------

Later

Tirmek - Ok Elina I went for a clawed look here. No those aren't dragon claws, just some of the smaller teeth.

The Arm glove is a deep dark blue, with lightning scorched teeth making small claws for the finger tips.

Tirmek - These claws will draw blood, but they are more useful for climbing or filching than fighting.

The larger scales form solid plating on the (is it the left or the right?) forearm and upper arm.

Tirmek - You'll resist electricity even more on this side, and the glove is completely immune. The crystals are hidden within the heavy plating and the claws. Like the old model it will allow you to manifest a second blade even while using larger versions of the primary. That shouldn't change much, but it does come with a nifty little bracelet for the other arm that will allow you to channel shadow energy to both blades equally. Now this thing also comes with a nifty new feature. It contains up to 10 spells, one of each level 0-9, that you may prepare as part of your shaman casting. You will be able to change them by laying a scroll inside the glove and giving it a nice blast of lightning. Right now I left it empty, you may use any divine scroll.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-14-07, 07:56 PM		Tirmek - If you help, you can eat the dragons i've got locked in the fridge.

Teiza - :drool: lets go.
Satnak: And yet not as good as Tarrasque chilli.

Erk: No one is eating my employees. The idiot villains NJ26 kills every day, yes. But my health insurance payments would go through the roof if I let people eat my employees.
rampant

01-14-07, 08:49 PM		Satnak - Oh come on he'll grow back.
-----------------------------------------------

Tirmek - What do you think Elina?
--------------------------------------------

Teiza - *munch*chomp*gorge*
--------------------------------------

Zella - So this is the young man you're dating.

Hyrd - Hello Ivy's mom.
Charles Phipps

01-14-07, 09:43 PM		Demon Wastes
24 hours in the future

Lilly: YOU WERE MY FRIEND! HOW COULD YOU BETRAY US!

*A character snarls back a response before falling to the volcanic flames below*

Lilly: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
urial angel of death

01-14-07, 10:00 PM		Later on, down the stree from Satnka's apartment.

Satnak: Wait why do we have to save the world?

Izzy: Somebody has to. Someone has to step up and take responsibility for the safety of innocents. Someone has to put others before themselves. Somebody has to be a hero.

Satnak: But why me?

Izzy: Bcause you are a hero. You had everything going for you, full scholarship, great job lined up. If you had just kept going the way you were life would have been easy, but you gave it all up to support Dorvos.

Satnak: I didn't really have any other choices.

Izzy: Yes you did, but they all would have ended up hurting this little guy *rubs Dorvos's hair*

Satnak: You haven't answered my question.

Izzy: There are events that will transpire that I am not fully equiped to expain and even if I were you wouldn't believe it until you have learned more.

Satnak: Why should I believe a word of this.

Izzy: You wouldn't have followed me this far if you didn't already.

Satnak: ...

Izzy: Come on we have to get the others. To Siberia.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-14-07, 10:51 PM		Tirmek - What do you think Elina?
Elina: In a word; :w00t: ness.

Sarah: :bigeyes:

Tirmek: :rolleyes: When you permenantly lose your arm under mysterious circumstances while fighting uber assassin alternates of your parents in a frozen wasteland after a pleasant date that destroys one or both of your gauntlets as well...then we'll talk.

Sarah: :bigeyes: But I'm your girlfriend. You have to pamper me. It's a rule!

Elina: *begins manifesting all manner of cool weaponry made of shadows* Sweet...

-----

Bunny: :plotting: :evillaugh

13: :plotting: :evillaugh

Silver: :plotting: :evillaugh

Bunny & 13: *anime sweatdrop*

Silver: What?
rampant

01-14-07, 11:10 PM		Tirmek - Use yours once in a while and we'll talk upgrade. but first, You!

Yuan - Me?

Tirmek - Yes, you useless weakling.

Elina - Don't you think he feels bad enough as it is?

Tirmek - How bad he feels is irrelevant. I don't expect him to keep up with you two. I don't even expect him to keep up with Lily.

Sarah - Buuuurrrrrrrrrn

Tirmek - I expect him to contribute. If I ever catch you doing nothing in a crisis again. I will personally, and permanently rip you to pieces and put you back together using tougher parts. And your new brain case will come with combat programming.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hyrd - Hyrd make gift for Ivy Mom. (holds out Link Plushie)

Zella - Its so cute! *huggles plushie*
Charles Phipps

01-14-07, 11:19 PM		Lilly: I've figured it out!

Ivy: Hmmm?

Lilly: Why I don't trust Yuan!

Ivy: He's dating Elina?

Lilly: YES...no!

Ivy: Cause I think that's it.

Hyrd: Ivy smell like fabric softener.

Ivy: Oh Gods...

Lilly: That's what you get for an 18 charisma.

Ivy: What is it then?

Lilly: The Final Fantasy character he most resembles Test!

Ivy: Uh huh...

Lilly: His result was TIDUS!

OOC: Oh yes and a :dragon: to rampant for "Best Burn" from Tirmek.
rampant

01-14-07, 11:47 PM		OOC: Ok How do you make those little spoiler boxes? My sig is getting out of hand. Speaking of which thanks Phipps
-----------------------------------------

Sarah - What do you mean I use them every time I punch someone.

Tirmek - But never the Elemental strike function.
--------------------------------------------------------

Hyrd male NG Half-red dragon half-human

Plushieficer/barbarian/reapingmauler

Hyrd is far from stupid, he just lacks formal education and his grammer is atrocius. Coupled with a one track mind, and a primitve fighting stlye (squeeze until its dead, or throw things at it) he comes off as slow. Hyrd loves to make plushies, all of his creations are plushies. Even the weapons. Hyrd grew up with his father, who had a loose grasp of common to start with, and tended to slip into draconic syntax. Hyrd has been smitten with Ivy and has even made an Ivy plushie to carry around when He can't hug Ivy.
---------------------------------------------------------------

Lily - Halt foul beast! By the order of St. George I command you to halt your rampage!

Hyrd - :confused:

Lily - Have at thee!

Hyrd - :eek: *throws a felt ball and runs for it*

Lily - Cannot resist ... plushieness ... must not squeeze obvious bomb...Huggles!

schkuggafoom

Lily - *cough*
Kaizer_Ryu

01-15-07, 12:00 AM		Yuan: Don't you think I wanted to? Have you ever tried to escape from a prison made of shadowmatter?

Elina: Yuan...

Yuan: I'm sorry, but that's too much! If I had the power to help her in any way at that time, I would have done so. I tried to break out. I tried and failed! But I still gave it my all! If you can give me a way to break free from a multidimensional prison composed of a substance that can't be harmed without access to light-based spells, THEN you can yell at me. Till then, shut the hell up.

Yuan storms out, completely incensed. Elina shoots Tirmek a look, then follows soon after.

Sarah: Wow...I didn't think he had it in him.

Tirmek: Perhaps this will show him the value of self-preservation. You're no good to anyone if you can't even protect yourself.

-----

Elina: Yuan!

Yuan: *still walking away* ...

Elina: Please...I know what he said was unfair, but that's his way of trying to help.

Yuan: He made it sound like I didn't even do anything! Like I just stood there and let you be beaten!

Elina: He's my friend and he doesn't want to see anything bad happen to me. If he didn't think you could do better, he wouldn't have given you a second chance.

Yuan quickly turns and grabs her shoulders. The look on his face is one of dispair and agony.

Yuan: I almost lost you!

Elina: Yuan...

Yuan: I...I was useless. I couldn't do anything at all and it almost got you killed. I said I would help you, protect in my own way. But that's not good enough.

Elina: I don't blame you, so stop acting like I do!

Yuan: But-!

Elina: No buts! You don't want something like that to happen again, right?

Yuan: *nods*

Elina: Then don't just hope it won't.

Yuan: ...yes, you're right. I'm sorry.

He let's go of her, and begins to head towards his room again.

Elina: Would you like me to come with you?

Yuan: I believe I need to think about this for a bit on my own. I shall do my best, do not worry.

With his proper speech returning, Elina's heart was a bit more at ease. Tirmek could be harsh, but at times it was better than any amount of kindness.

OOC: The spoiler box is similar to the quote function. but instead of 'quote' and '/quote', you put 'sblock' and '/sblock' between the []. If you want a title other than 'Spoiler', just add '=<insert title here>' after 'sblock', just like the 'quote' function.
rampant

01-15-07, 12:29 AM		OOC: Thanks again Kaizer.
-----------------------------

Yuan - ( in a burgertime uniform ) Ok I'm paying off Tirmek for a Staff of Brilliant Negation, why are you here?

Lily - (wearing a similar outfit ) I signed an adventurers' charter with Maladren, before the whole Rakshasa adventure. Somehow I owe her money for all the potions, and other consumable items she used.

Hyrd - Hyrd want cheese burger with egg. Hyrd also need chicken sandwhich, and 2 colas. Hyrd have date with Ivy:D
---------------------------------------

'nother :cookie: up for grabs if you can get this reference, also Gil "the Arm" Hamilton is a character in several Larry Niven novels who loses his arm, but gains an extraordinary psychic ability that mimics it with a few differences.

13 - You realise of course you are a collossal geek.
Charles Phipps

01-15-07, 12:48 AM		Yuan: Damnit! Damnit! Damnit!

*Yuan walks over to Lilly whose fishing over the other side*

Yuan: I despise you.

Lilly: Hmmm?

Yuan: You constantly hang around, hanging on Elina's every word and doing your best to be more heroic than me!

Lilly: Hey, that's not true!

Yuan: YOU HAVE AN ELINA PLUSHIE IN YOUR HAND RIGHT NOW!

Lilly: Uhhh Hyrd gave it to me!

Yuan: It's life size! I don't even want to know what you're doing with it!

Lilly: Listen jack....hold on, I have a bite.

Yuan: A bite, THIS IS A :censored: airship! What the hell are you catching!?

*Lilly picks up the Duck he caught with his fishing line*

Yuan: And don't think I don't know you've been badmouthing me behind my back!

Lilly: That's a lie, I've been directly in front of you when I badmouth you.

Yuan: Just who the Hell do you think you are?

Lilly: Your brother.

Yuan: NOW SEE....what?

Lilly: Dude, you look exactly like Ivy did when he was sixteen only you're a half-elf. I assume that means you're another one of my dad's offspring.

Yuan: I.....now see here!

Lilly: Now I won't lie to you. I've had a crush on Elina since I was old enough to know girls were kind of fun to be around. I love her and always will. She'll never forgive me for what I did to Ivy though and even if Ivy did, she's going to always fear I could hurt the ones I love.

Yuan: That's not really MY PROBLEM.

Lilly: No it's not. I'm happy for Elina and wish she'd forgive me just so I can be her friend. However, given the fact her closest friend was revealed to be a monster and that she's been betrayed and hurt by plenty of others...I'm suspicious of anyone new.

Yuan: Well I find that appalling.

Lilly: Go ahead. I do have to ask you a few questions though.

Yuan: Very well.

Lilly: Where do you come from?

Yuan: Sharn.

Lilly: Where in Sharn?

Yuan: Errr......

Lilly: Can you describe it?

Yuan: I know who my parents were and all those facts!

Lilly: Who?

Yuan: *Yuan felt his head* That's strange, it's on the tip of my tongue.

Lilly: It's okay Yuan. I know you're not evil.

Yuan: Thank you. I don't mean to be such a bother.

Lilly: I'll go buy you a drink.

Lilly worried very much about his new friend who shared his blood.
Paulon

01-15-07, 12:56 AM		OOC:
'nother :cookie: up for grabs if you can get this reference, also Gil "the Arm" Hamilton is a character in several Larry Niven novels who loses his arm, but gains an extraordinary psychic ability that mimics it with a few differences.

Like being able to reach into TV screens because he can 'see' the location and it looks to be in arms reach, and 'feel' the bone scars left by surgery by running his 'hand' through a suspected (and thus confirmed) organlegger's body?

Don't know the other reference though.
rampant

01-15-07, 12:56 AM		Yuan - Hurry up! Hyrd has two settings huggle and KILL!

Ivy - You try it! The only one I can get to fall into the trap is the hotdog! He ordered egg!

Yuan - Use the pepper!
-----------------------------------------------------

Hyrd - Hyrd get tickets to movie later.:D

Ivy - How did I get here?
-------------------------------

OORampant - :cookie: for paulon
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-15-07, 08:48 AM		Lilly and Yuan head down to Erk's Place after a hard day of work.

Lilly (tapping on the bar): Barkeep, two mugs of your finest ale for two hard-working men.

Yuan: I'm not really in the mo—

Lilly: Oh, come, come now. My father and adopted grandfather drink all the time, and they're the finest captains on Eberron.

Erk: We do not serve alchohol to minors.

Lilly: Oh come on! We've seen enough drama on this thread to qualify us as adults!

Erk: No maturity, no inebriation.

Lilly: In medevil society they were letting kids get married by my age.

Erk: And we really want to imitate those time. :rolleyes:

Lilly: How bad could it be if you just give me a little drink?

Erk: Your Wisdom score is low enough as it is.

NJ26: Burned. :P

Lilly: *sigh* Then give us—WHAT IN THE NAME OF MY MOTHER IS HE DOING HERE?!

doog jr.: doog jr. no longer work for Not-Thorn [OOC: To interject, the original Thorn is a good-guy hero based off Darkwing Duck, so I'm distancing him formt he villain Thorn]. doog jr. find out he not who he say he was. doog jr. have e-pif-fan-y. doog jr. see that doog jr.'s evil only hurt doog jr.'s friends. doog jr. train under great towel-head golem and learn ways of peace. now doog jr. have steady job and puppy to support.

A powdery blue puppy with tiny bat-like wings and a pom antenna on its head can be seen dashing between the legs of the tables and patrons.

OOKaizer: I don't want to know.

Silver: No, no you do not. :D

Erk: Doog Jr. is our new bouncer.

doog jr.: doog jr. now protector of the people.

Yuan: Bouncer doesn't sound like a very peaceful job.

doog jr.: doog jr. protect from scary big lady.

*CRASH*

Mendova: So you like it rough?!
Endless_Helix

01-15-07, 11:24 AM		In Dolurrh...


Doog: You know... this is kind of relaxing.

Camera pans to show Doog being waited on by a dozen or so half-naked, nubile, Jaynes.

Doog: I can be who I want to be with no worries about if people will accept me. It's amazing! It's as though a great weight has been taken off my shoulders. However, I can no longer remember what my favorite color is, who popped my cherry, or what my middle name is... Funny. I can't say that I'm particularly bothered by it. My vocabulary has also increased for some reason. Strange. But anyway, this is probably the most fun I've had, living or dead.

Random Soul: It gets worse. Eventually... you can't remember anything. How to speak, how to... you know... ummm... things that happen in your mind... uh...

Doog: Watch porn?

Random Soul: *pause* Maybe. But anyway, I can't remember much of my past now. I was on a... flying asylum... at least it was a big box full of the most insane beings in the world.

Doog: This sounds hauntingly familiar...

Random Soul: I was at the bottom of the food chain... I think I joined on as a "colored shirt" or something...

Doog: Oh.

Random Soul: I was subjected to horrifying mental and physical torture by way of entities beyond mortal comprehension and back-breaking labor. The captain of this fine... thingie... claimed to be a cloud. Although I could be mixing this up with an acid trip I had back when I... can't remember the word... Nevermind. But I can remember my first death clearly! My second is still a bit fuzzy. Although that may have been the fact that my body was falling to pieces at the time and that I think I got hit by a lightning bolt.

Doog: That sounds like it hurt.

Random Soul: Not compared to my first death. I got swallowed whole by a giant sun dragon in war with metal monsters. I destroyed it at the cost of my own hideously mutated body, I think I was a human... or maybe an otter... but when I died I had seven tentacles sticking out of my pseudopodic body... I... was digested alive in the beasts dead stomach... the acid thankfully left much of my body in tact...

Doog::eek: Ewwww... That really sucks. I can't remember how I died...

Random Soul: That's probably because it wasn't particularly traumatic.

Doog: But... Now I'm here... In a place that eats at my memory. I"M LOSING WHO I AM TO AN EMPTY VOID!

Random Soul: Yep. That's about the worst of it. You can sort of stave it off... Basically you dwell on everything you can remember. Like I can still remember part of my name.

Doog: Really?

Random Soul: Call me... Ishmael.

Doog: Okay... Uh... What was I talking about?

Ishmael: I haven't the foggiest notion.
urial angel of death

01-15-07, 12:12 PM		'nother :cookie: up for grabs if you can get this reference, also Gil "the Arm" Hamilton is a character in several Larry Niven novels who loses his arm, but gains an extraordinary psychic ability that mimics it with a few differences.

13 - You realise of course you are a collossal geek.

OOC: Of course I too know who he was.

Niven wrote good books but was a very lonely man, who had no idea how women really act.
Lord Kale Fangblade

01-15-07, 12:55 PM		Sithis looked at the remains of the battle from days ago.
Frostfell. it was here that Elina had defeated the shadow creatures... or had she? perhaps this also was a trick.
Was this what he'd been hunting all along? perhaps not.

if somthing was that powerful it definitly would not be stupid enough to engage Elina in a head on confrentation. Elina would always win. Unless.... perhaps the point was not that it should win. but Elina should win.
what goal could such beings possibly have? only time would tell. untill then he'd keep up his vigalence, keep his mind open to possibilities and wait.
only time would tell.
rampant

01-15-07, 02:28 PM		Maladren - How do i always end up watching the rugrats?

Rashour - Why do I even need a sitter?

Lady - If I have to have a sitter so do you.

Dorvos - Hmmmm

Rashour - Seven years and I still have no clue what you're saying.

Teiza - Grrrrr

Maladren - Stop trying to eat squishy!

Squishy - not another one!

Cole - hehehe

Schroedigger - what now?

A.W.L. (covered in spent blasting powder) - Noooooo the sqeaky tow has betrayed me!

Cole - :rofl:

A.W.L. - YOU! (pounce)

:duel:

Poppy - no!

Picks one up in each hand.

Maladren - Thank you poppy, now put them down.
----------------------------------------------------------

Ok Heres how I'm writing them, feel free to correct this

Lady - 10

Rashour, Cole, Schroedigger, A.W.L. - 9

Dorvos - 8

Teiza, Corre - 7

Poppy - 3
cypher_zero

01-15-07, 02:51 PM		OOC: Hey, I know I haven't done anything with Rashour in a while, but I've been planning some stuff with him so... your last post... not canon.

Rashour
Shifter/living construct abberation
Warblade 6, Bloodstorm Blade 10, Sorcerer 10

Rashour has been on Teseris most of his life and hence has aged faster than any of the others. He's about 19 years of age at this point and has been training since he could walk to be a powerful warrior and general of his father's armies. He prefers to weild adamantine battleaxes enchanted for longer range. In combat, he will stay flying and open up with ranged attacks until his opponent can close, at which point he'll just butcher them up close. His shifter nature just makes him all the more ferocious when confronted as well.

Personality wise, he's a bit of an arrogant prince. He believes that he is one of the strongest in the land (more or less true when on teseris) and constantly strives to prove it. By the same token, he's not one to jump into combat without provication, and will actually avoid fighting if he doesn't think that the opponent is worth the contest. You will aslo note that he is Terrek's son and so may often find ways to "get around" direct confrontations with deception and trickery.

He also hasn't spent much time on the FF at all or around any of his half-brothers and so likely doesn't really remember them or wouldn't acknowlege that they are his half-brothers as he doesn't acknowlege his mother either having been raised solely by Terrek. Those that he has had the most contact with are his immediate family (those that spend a good bit of time on Teseris): Serene (Sister), Satnak (Sister in-law), thier kids (Dorvos, Corre and Teiza; his nephew and nieces respectively). He admires Satnak's raw power, but thinks of her as a bit of a brute but fun nonetheless; especially to spar with. He loves Serene to death and would kill before he'd let anything happen to her. He is glad for Satnak in that way because with her around... Who's gonna mess with his sis?

As far as their kids go (Serene and Satnak's) he treats them more like his own brother and sisters than his nephew and neices and so likes to romp around with them and teach them whatever little bits he can.

Pleas note that his speed is the same as Terrek's: fly 120 ft perfect. He doesn't touch the ground unless he's forced to (or it provided a tactical advantage) and has grown up flying everywhere (actually has a mild disdain for "land dwellers").

I'll post more on him later.
.
urial angel of death

01-15-07, 03:11 PM		Squishy drops a few more galleons of the crew's wages he'd withheld for some minor transgresion. They made a very satisfying clanging sound as they hit the others in thye vault.

Squishy: *begins dancing*
Cha-Ching, Cha-Ching, Cha-Chingerey
Money oh money, how I love thee
Cha-Ching, Cha-Chong, Cha-Changaroo
From pennies to dollars, any amount'll do
Cha-Ching, Cha-Ching, it's no contest
There's only one thing that I love the best
From every sight I've ever seen to the sweetest sound I've heard
I'd gladly give up everything for all the money that I've earned
Cha-Ching, Cha-Ching, Cha-Chingerey
There's nothing on Earth like the feeling of green
There's nothing on Earthhhhhh like the feeling of greeeeeen

Tabatha: Sir you're doing it again.

Squishy: Sorry.

OOC: Cookie to the person who can get where that song came from.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-15-07, 03:21 PM		OOC: Mary Poppins, "Chim-chimeny" or whatever its called.

Also you deserve a :$$: for portraying crazy greed.
urial angel of death

01-15-07, 03:35 PM		OOC: It helps if you include the visuals I had thought up.

In line six Squishy is looking at image crystal depicting Terra, Volrath, and the rest of the crew having a good time.
By line seven image has changed to that of Squishy selling them all out for large bounties.

Also while what Silver said is technically the origin of the song. I based it on (read: stole) a more recent parody of the Mary Poppins song.
Charles Phipps

01-15-07, 03:48 PM		:ghosted: to endless helix for "best depiction of an afterlife."
DungeonJman

01-15-07, 07:36 PM		Well, since Squishy mentioned it, here's the Monty Python version: The Money Song:


I've got ninety thousand pounds in my pajamas.
I've got forty thousand French francs in my fridge.
I've got lots and lots of lira,
Now the deutschmark's getting dearer,
And my dollar bill could buy the Brooklyn Bridge.
There is...

...nothing quite as wonderful as money!
There is nothing quite as beautiful as cash!
Some people say it's folly, but I'd rather have the lolly (?),
With money you can make a splash!

There is nothing quite as wonderful as money!
There is nothing quite as beautiful as cash!
Everyone must hanker for the butchness of a banker
It's the currency that makes the world go round!

You can keep your Marxist ways, for it's only just a phase...
Money, money, money makes the world go round!

Money! Money! Money! Money! Money! Money! Money! Money! Money!
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-15-07, 07:49 PM		OOC: For anyone who wants a brief, yet potentially horrifying glimpse into the curriculum of the schools in Lower Deck City, try here: Sharn Memorial High (http://mutantsandmasterminds.com/super-vision/). I think their football team is named the Lower Deck Drecks. Maybe I can work in a growing rivalry with Sigil.
DungeonJman

01-15-07, 10:25 PM		Which Sharn is it a memorial of? The city's been rebuilt 40 times!
rampant

01-15-07, 10:29 PM		OORampant - 43 actually

Constuction Company Exec - I"M FILTHY STINKING RICH BABY!
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Rashour - You know I really need to watch that left hook, when I spar with Satnak.

Yuan - Can you reach the back of my neck? there is a huge slinter digging in there.

Scene zooms out to show Rashour and Yuan stuck in the mast.
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Lily - WHy Does everyone order the fragging egg?
------------------------------------------------------------

Hyrd - Hyrd invite Ivy home to meet Dad.
DungeonJman

01-15-07, 10:48 PM		*in a cave*

Why am I here? Oh right, apparently i'm interrogating some stupid rogue to see if he can help the FF guys about the Chamber.

* a huge blue dragon appears*

Great Blue Wyrm: What is it that you wish.

DungeonJ: Well, i've come on behalf of the....

GBW: Can it. You're one of those forgotten freedom guys aren't you. No wait, i've heard about your kind, your one of those non-existant things, well fine job you've been doing.

DungeonJ: What do you mean.

GBW: Well, you let out the evil shadow alts. of those people, and that one time you tried to do something good it backfired in your face. Coupled with that, your lack of being able to keep the sides of your personality under control, and your not being good at whatever it is you are, you're pretty bad.

*depressed*

GBW: You're just a little worm who can't do anything for right side, and you can't even uphold your "honor". Stupid principles, they're bloody useless, i mean chivalry. I can't believe that you would believe in such junk.

DungeonJ: *angry* There are a lot of people who would clobber you for that, but since they're not here...


REPEL THE 15 TIMES DEAD BEAST

(Combo of repel the beast and strike of 15 times death focused through the swords)


*dragon goes flying through the air. Meanwhile, the captain whose ship i blasted with the Shadow Garrote has commisioned a new airship*

Captain: Finally, it took all of my remaining money and dignity to get this very expensive airship, but i got it. :D

*Dragon comes hurdling towards the ship*

Captain::eek: :weep: :bigeyes: :rant: :uh-huh: :banghead::help:

Dragon: Oh crud

*BOOOOOOOOOOOM*
Kaizer_Ryu

01-16-07, 12:21 AM		OOC: Phase 1 of "The :censored: Hits the Fan" complete. Commencing Phase 2.

IC:

Yuan: What do you mean?

Elina: Just what I said.

Yuan: *worried* You realize this will be seen as a declaration of war, right?

Elina: *raises her right arm* :mad: I'd say they took the first shot.

Yuan: But you don't even know if it will work.

Elina: On the contrary, I have a very good reason to believe that it will...

Around her, semi-transparent images appear. When she encountered Terrek, she siphoned off some of the older soul memories that clung to the dregs of his aura. The images are that of souls he drained in centuries past.

Yuan: Terrek won't be upset? He is formidable as either an enemy or ally.

Elina: He seemed not to notice, but even if he did, it's not like he was using them. And it's not like he's a target unless he sides with the dragons...

-----

Several minutes later, the two arrive in the Mournlands on the Fields of Ruin.

Yuan: Are you sure about this?

Elina: I've been running and hiding for four years. I'm tired of it. If I want to live free, I have to be willing to fight for it.

Shapes begin to form in the mist. The same kind that assaulted her all those years ago. Only now, they do not attack, nor do they reach out. They merely stand about the two, waiting for something.

Elina: I know now what it is you want of me. Freedom from this eternal torment. I can give it to you, in exchange for your aid in attaining my own freedom. What say you?

The shapes do nothing.

Elina: *sternly* What say you?!

The shapes swirl about, slowly at first, then faster. Yuan cannot hear their voices, but Elina begins arguing with them.

-----

A Syberis shower of considerable size rains down upon Obsidian City, the ancient home of the Sulatar. The inhabitants have grown accustomed to such occurences over the centuries, and have the appropriate countermeasures in place. Their leaders, however, are less calm.

High Sulatar Shaman: She will come soon. The one known as the Promise Breaker.

Commander Cobra (OOC: Yes, I know I'm going to pun hell for that): We must marshal our forces, then.

High Sulatar Shaman: Yes. Summon Hur'uti. He will be the one to slay this abomination.

Commander Cobra: My son will face this beast alone?!

High Sulatar Shaman: She comes to break the Promise, and only by her death can the Gates be opened. Only the chosen wielder of the Blade of Burning Promise can hope to defeat her. Your son is the first in many years to draw upon the full power of the Blade.

Cobra bows and leaves to begin preparations as the Shaman walks towards the window. He gazes out at the final sign of the Promise Breaker spoken of in ancient legends. In his hand, he holds a strange staff crafted in a time beyond memory. The ancient Giants used it as a key to the chamber below the city. None had entered that sacred site, but legend said it would unleash either an era of horrible suffering or unparalleled bounty upon the face of Eberron. Depending on which myths you paid attention too...

-----

Elina and Yuan were forced to flee as her command of the situation deteriorated. They now stood outside the Mournlands, trying to decide what to do next.

Yuan: You are still unable to control those things. The mist makes them far more powerful, not to mention violent, than your other...creatures.

Elina: I'm aware of this. Fade already, you blasted seal! I refuse to simply wait for the next attempt on my life! *annoyed sigh* Grab on. I have another idea.

The two fade into the darkness once again.

OOC: I'd really prefer it if no one had their characters find out about this just yet. I'll post the next part as well as give plenty of opportunity for you all to interfere later tonight.

Phase 1 of "Beauty and the Bishie" to begin shortly.
rampant

01-16-07, 01:04 AM		Corre - 1 and two and-

Reshalin - Are you going to be at that all night?

Corre - 3, Probably, 1 and 2 and 3

Reshalin - Why bother You're already the teachers' favorite.

Corre - Because I'm going to do the best I can. What's the point of anything less?

Reshalin - ... :rolleyes: naieve freak
Charles Phipps

01-16-07, 02:23 AM		OOC: So where has Rose been anyway and Captain Jarlot?

IC:

Argonessan
The Dungeons of the Dragon kings

*Rose and Jarlot are in shackles*

Rose: This is all your fault.

Jarlot: *shouts at the top of his lungs through the bars to the side* LET US OUT YOU p*** drinking sons of circus w****!

Rose: You wanted to go explore the Draconic prophecy to go save us all from eternal control at the hands of the Draconic Empire.

Jarlot: I thought I wanted us to do a Council of Wyrms LARP.

Rose: I'm trying to regain some sense of dignity here.

Jarlot: YOU! ALL OF YOU REPTILIAN :censored: ! I :censored: your mothers, sisters, and daughters up the :censored:! Every last one of your eggs! That's me!

Rose: Yes, good idea. Get the Dragons mad at us. The whole CONTINENT of Dragons.

Jarlot: Oh just because this is an Epic Level Gamer's wet dream...

Rose: That would explain you wetting yourself.

Jarlot: THE EP MAN! THINK OF THE EP!

Rose: You were a bad influence on my son.

Jarlot: Oh yes, your son whom can't even decide on being a fighter or a wizard. WHO THE HELL EVER HEARD OF A FIGHTER/WIZARD!?

Rose: Multiclassing at low level...

Jarlot: You can't multiclass into fighter or you run the risk of never reaching epic levels! The nature of min-maxing depends on focusing on ONE class!

Rose: I wonder how long it'll take them to notice we're gone.

Jarlot: Oh hell, they never noticed that Doog was dead!

Doog's Ghost: Thanks for that btw.

Rose: Yeah yeah. No one cares.

Ishmael: I need to carry a message from...

Rose: Jarlot?

Jarlot: *spits a piece of bone from his last meal using his epic levels to kill the ghosts*

Doog: *as he dissolves* Whoever heard of a +1 boneeeeeee....

Rose: I knew we should have stuck with our Spelljamming campaign.

Jarlot: Yes, replacing Slip was a bit of a task though.

***

The Elven Navy's headquarters

Honor Harrington: YOU TWO TIMING BASTARVE!

Rose: Listen, honey I can explain...

Samus Aaron: You'll pay for this.....

***

Jarlot: Does Zella know you play other video games than hers?

Rose: Let's keep that quiet shall we?

Jarlot: In any case, let's focus on our escape.

Rose: Like our last one where we had random encounters with Dragons?

Jarlot: Hey! There's plenty of low level gaming opportunities for you too here Spoony!

Rose: Oh? *sarcastically*

Jarlot: Fairy dragons, pseudodragons, komodo dragons, draconians, Draco Malfoy....

***

Earlier that day

Draco Malfoy: I'll get that Harry Potter!

*The 13 year old is stabbed through the back of the chest with a dagger by Rose*

Draco Malfoy: GURK

***

Rose: In any case, we still need to see the Draconic Prophecy.

Jarlot: I already saw it.

Rose: AND?

Jarlot: 42!

Rose: :twitch:

Jarlot: It seems that's everything. They just interpret from that.
rampant

01-16-07, 02:37 AM		Bezen - Why can't I get a date with Sarah?

Tellowas - Besides the pigeon feathers in your teeth?

Bezen - You cough up a feather in someone's soup, one time, and your labled for life!

Tellowas - For some reason she's with that scumwad Tirmek.

Bezen - Arrogant bastard.

Tellowas - Overbearing know it all. No accounting for taste.

They come upon Sarah smooching Tirmek's cheek.

Sarah - mmh cinnamon

Tellowas - I just remembered i promised mother I was going to pick up some spices today.

Bezen - me too
-------------------------------------

Zella - HE WHAT!

Kithle - Appearantly he's been moving on to book heroines as well, especially those who are self-reliant and have no need of rescuers.

Zella - I need to borrow death paper.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-16-07, 03:08 AM		OOC: This actually turned into Phase 3 of "The :censored: Hits the Fan". Hope you like it. :devil:

IC:

Yuan: Elina, please! This is too much!

Elina: I'm not giving up, Yuan.

Yuan: I understand that, but look at what you're doing! You've broken into the Library of Korranberg's restricted section, Morgrave University's classified documents, the Wayfinder Foundation's secret vaults, and even raided the Twelve's storehouses! Even with my shielding you could be found out.

Elina: I've learned enough to give me a direction and a goal. That's all I needed. The Giants of Xendric had the most advanced magical knowhow in history.

Yuan: But they're long gone. Their decendants are little better than savages for the most part. The old ways are long forgotten.

Elina: Then we need the next best source. Ones who have carried on the traditions and practices of the Giants.

Yuan: You...you can't seriously be thinking of just waltzing into the Obsidian City?!

Elina: :rolleyes: Of course not.

Yuan: *grabs his chest out of relief* Thank your mother...

Elina: :D We're flying in.

Yuan: :ghosted:

-----

Sarah had searched frantically for Elina once she realized no one had seen hide nor hair of her or Yuan for several hours now. Despite the best efforts of several of the crew, she could not be found on board and the portal to One Eye had not been accessed.

Lisa: Any luck?

Sarah: :( No...

Terra: Oh dear...

Lisa: What now?!

Terra: We aren't alone... Come on out...Lana.

Lana: I should expect no less from my alternate. You even used my real name! (OOC: Lana was Terra's original name)

The shadows coalesced into a humanoid shape. The very same shape that had attacked Elina in Frostfell.

Terra: Lucky guess. You don't even exist. For all intents and purposes, you are my Nobody.

OOC: There you go, rampant. KHII reference. THAT GAME ROCKS! :D No KHIII till at least 2010, though :weep: .

Lisa: What have you done with my daughter?!

Lana: I have done nothing. Well, except maybe give her a little 'push'. :smirk:

Shadow Lisa: *forms* It's amazing what a little subterfuge can do.

Terra: *prepares to attack* :mad: You will pay for this. I swear it.

Lana: Bring it, missy. The longer you take with us, the better. :devil: :P

Throughout the ship, shadow doubles appear from nowhere. However, the "one crewmember, one double" rule doesn't seem to apply...

OOC: Ok, here's what's going on in a nutshell. The universe Lana is from progressed along a very different route than this one. This is your chance to show what your characters would be like had some crucial event in their past turned out differently. For example, Lisa turned to the dark side when she gave into her anger and despair. Michael's a drunk who can't drink and a womanizer who can't have sex, so he's less inept and prone to lazyness. Certain characters, like most of the kids, never even came into existance, due to the divergent lives of their parents, so no doubles for them. Others were simply out of reach (Terrek on Teseris) or just too obnoxiously happy to be turned (Aerith). Or too cool.

Jarlot: Damn right. *strikes Cloud victory pose*

Just so you know, Lana is virtually a goddess in mortal form right now. The only reason Elina fought her off was Terra interrupted her power flow. As such, any alternates summoned here have been turned into her shadow thralls. They retain their personality, but answer to Lana. Since only those connected to Lana have been brought with her, no "non-corrupted" Alt's for this sequence. Lana is the source, and only taking her out can destroy the rest.

I know how to, but I'm not telling you yet. :evillaugh

I had a version of this idea MONTHS ago, and I've finally found a way to use it! :w00t:
rampant

01-16-07, 03:39 AM		Tirmek - Oh this is original Teiza?

Teiza - Shut up Cooking!

Shadow Spoony - Not the bar-b-q
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-16-07, 08:28 AM		Alt-NJ26: Evil Ninja Stealthy Sneak Attack!

NJ26: :rolleyes: Yeah, real smooth. Narrative Element Secret Ninja Technique Only Taught To The Good Guys!

*BEATDOWN!*

Alt-Erk (wearing your general "tough guy" outfit): (facing down Erk) Grrrr! (raises club)

Erk: *sucker-punch*

Alt-Erk: (club falls on own head)

Lucky: That wasn't very über-smart.

Erk: It isn't smart to be effective?

Lucky: Touché.

Alt-Lucky: Aww, what the :censored:?! You mean to tell me I'm a :censored: in this dimension? :rant: I'm going to have to beat you down, pervent, just for being who you are!

Lucky: Really? *strikes sexy pose, blows kiss* ;)

Alt-Lucky: :eek: I…what…no…hormones…must resist…:ghosted:

Lucky: So how's Tony doing?

A zakya rakshasa comes racing out of the kitchen at high speed, literally able to run up the walls and across the cieling.

Erk: I guess Tony perfected his new cereal.

Tony (holding up a bowl of milk and frost corn-flakes): They're GRRRRRRRRREAT!

Mendova (who didn't have an Alt show up): Hey, has anyone seen Saberiel?
**********
Alt-Saberiel: :blush: And I thought I was the evil one.…………I'll just…step out now—

Saberiel: Oh, no you don't. :devil:

Alt-Saberiel: :mymy: :embarrass
**********
OOC: Also Charles gets a :rimshot: for creative use of pop-culture to show how silly prophecy can be.
DungeonJman

01-16-07, 11:59 AM		Wait, i'm confused, since Nobby would have come into this universe anyway, thus messing up the space time continum, does that mean i have an evil alt? Or does being an E.B.N.E. contradict that, or does him being an E.B.N.E. contradict that

*gets punched and staggers backwards*

Evil DungeonJ: The answer is, that you don't have an evil alt, but you have to face the evil side of yourself. Satisfied?

*draws out brilliant energy hand and a half sword, wielded two handed, except it glows with black light*

DungeonJ: *as he draws out his own swords* You just had to rip off Star Wars, even though you're a warlock, didn't you?

(P.S. I've also had an idea like this for a bit, although it was supposed to be from the time i originally tried to stop the Promise Breaker)

P.S.S. Yes, i know that there is no such thing as a black lightsaber.

P.S.S.S: You didn't expect the Draconic Prophecy to be 42?

P.S.S.S.S: I really have to stop making so many side notes.
urial angel of death

01-16-07, 12:03 PM		OOC: Oh cry me a river Kaizer, we've been waiting for Starcraft 2 for 8 years!

IC:
Alt-Izzy: I'm what you would have become if you had never killed your parents and become a pawn of the gods. And even for you there is still hope. You could return to a normal life and give up the burden of being the gods' vassel.

Izzy: You know I never thought of it that way. *voidblades Alt-Izzy in half*

OOC: Will be doing the rest shortly
DungeonJman

01-16-07, 12:13 PM		*DungeonJ is facing his evil side in a battle reminiscent of Anakin vs. Dooku in Episode 3*

Evil DungeonJ: I sense much anger in you.

DungeonJ: For the record, THIS ISN'T A STUPID STAR WARS RIP OFF!

*forces the evil side onto the ground*

Well, apparently, shoving you in my head wasn't good enough, so

*begins drawing the binding seal that he's talked about*

ARCANE SEAL OF THE MIND: 3 CHAMBERED CONTAINMENT

*a series of 3 invisible forcefields form around a square, which has 9 circles in it, corresponding to the alignments. The alignment circles then shoot out beams of multi-hued light, which seal the Evil DungeonJ in a sphere hovering above the square*

Evil DungeonJ: A little melodramatic aren't we?

DungeonJ: Yeah, well i'm cutting it now so the Dramadars don't get me. And you're going to be stuck in there for a long time.

*walks away to see if he can help the others*
Lord Kale Fangblade

01-16-07, 12:16 PM		Sa'vors Citadel. ( im really going to have to come up with a name for it somtime.)

the deziens of this place where locked in a titanic conflict with their alternates, there wasnt any organised battle lines, only a bloody brawl while each side fough for control of different parts of the Citadel.
the main courtyard was the site of the largest battle as nither side would retreat. Feal-Thas bellowed orders at his squads, holding the lines the best he could. his armour was covered in dents and at points had the broken shafts of arrows sticking from it clutched in his right hand was his vicious sword already drenched in blood.

Feal-Thas glanced up towards the height of the tallest tower, where periodic flashes of light showed the duel between Naz'roth and his alternate. Feal-Thas had heard reports that the Dark libary was also the centre of a similar titanic strugle. this time between Tara and her alternate.
Feal-Thas danced through the melee, he hadnot an shadowy version of himself so he was free to assist the best he could.

they where winning. there was just so many of them. somthing was leading them... a monumental power that he could sense in the distance. a crackling nebulous of eldritch energy. Feal-Thas brought his sword round, cleaving one of his opponents in half. it vanished, only to reform somewhere else. he scowled and brought his sheild up to block an arrow fired from the battlements above. He only he could hold the courtyard long enough...

****

Naz'roth snarled, releasing a bolt lightning at his opponent. its struck his alternate in the chest sending it staggering back. Naz'roth drew on his powers, channeling the fell energyies that lurked at his heart. It had been so long since he'd found a good opponent, he was almost enjoying himself.
he formed a shield about himself as the shadowy him retaliated.
flames crashed into the shield dancing along its edge. Naz'roth snarled with concentration as he held the shield agaisnt the flames. it held.

Naz'roth snarled with satisfaction as he unleashed a stream of energy at his alternate stopping its assault. Naz'roth unleashed blast after blast, hammering his opponents defenses with savage ease. His opponent stumbled backwards as his defenses collapsed under the onslaught.
Naz'roth smiled evily and drew on his power....

***

Tara rolled. narrowly avioding being crushed by a falling book case. her alternate had caught her by suprise. thrice damned sorcerers and their evocation.
Tara lashed out with a lightningbolt spell as she rose sending its crackling energies directly at her opponent. he opponent counterspelled with her own lightning bolt, sending sparks crashing down as they collided in mid air.

Tara formed a shield of energy around herself as her alternate attacked, watching as the bolts of energy danced across the spheres surface.
Tara poured more energy into the shield as her alternate intensified the assualt, more and more spells impacting with the now shimmering shield.
Tara reached out with her mind, using a quickened telekenisis spell she managed to break her opponents concentration by dropping a book shelf on her covering her opponent in a mound of tomes.

the books where immolated as a wave of flame came from the mound.
Tara stared with dismay at the ashes.

Tara: those Tomes where thousands of years old...

Alt-Tara: Books are irrelavant. only power matters.

Tara snarled as she drew on her power. feeling the energy crackle and dance across her flesh. she felt the power coursing through her soul. a nebulus of dark shimmering energy.
Tara raised her hand. the power burning in her eyes.
that b:censored: would pay. no one damaged her books. no one.
rampant

01-16-07, 12:18 PM		Aomas - Tirmek poor deluded boy.

Tirmek - I should have known she'd bring you as well.

Aomas - As the angel of fate it is my duty to see prophecy laid in its proper form.

Tirmek - We both know this, you want me or atleast the part of me that can become the knightmare prince. All my darkness, rage, terror, and cruelty. Well too bad its mine, my darkness is mine alone!

Aomas - How terribly Rakshasa of you.

Tirmek - *smirk* after 13 years is that the best you got?

Sarah - Grrrrr

Tirmek - I think it would be best if you went after Elina, Take this, its a recall powerstone activate it and I'll be 'portrd in.

Sarah - On it!
-fades out-

Tirmek - :rolleyes: I hope she listens this time, I really don't feel up to teaching a crash course in angel trouncing.
DungeonJman

01-16-07, 12:22 PM		Wait, instead of facing a shadow alt, wouldn't Naz'roth face a good version of himself, or his brother or something?
Crystalforged

01-16-07, 01:46 PM		Kanatash, who is still with the kids, is surrounded by four alternates of himself. Instead of engaging them he turns to the kids.

Kanatash: Excellent, now this is going to be a good life lesson for all of you. Now the thing is if you're going to be spending any significant amount of time on this ship sooner or later you're going to be assulted by an alternate version of yourself from another dimension. I'm going to teach you how to deal with these annoyances. The first thing you need to remember is that these people are just like you exept at some point in their lives something occured slightly different and this has changed them. So what does that mean for us?

Nina: (raising her hand) We know most if not all of their weaknesses?

Kanatash: Precisely. Now lets take a look at what we have to deal with here. We have Agent Smith who was never defeated when my duplicate when wild, a gibbering madman version of myself which never reach the state of perfect madness I have, a paladin version of myself who never went to Xoriat, and Towelie who is a version of me that followed after my parents and became a hippy.

Agent Smith: (pulls out a gun) Mr. Anderson.

Kanatash: Oh, we have a volunteer to go first. Watch closely now kids.

Kanatash dives into Agent Smith's body who begins to bulge and deform before exploding in a massive burst of light. Kanatash stands where Agent Smith once was.

Kids: Oooooh.

Kanatash: Remember, if they're a movie rip off and they've been killed in that movie you can always kill them the same way. Now next we have the gibbering madman. Now I'm going to ask you're kids to shield your eyes on this one. If Silver has anything to say about it you'll probably find out sooner or later but I would prefer your parents explained it to you first.

The kids move to cover their eyes (although every single one of them is peeking) while Kanatash puts his arm around his alternate and pulls out a photo album. Kanatash begins paging though it and his alternate begins to convulse as he does so. After a few minutes the alternate stands still and Kanatash puts the album away.

Alt-Kanatash: (holds out a hand) Thank you, thank you very much. I've finally reached perfect madness.

Kanatash: (shaking hands) You're welcome. It wasn't a problem.

Alt-Kanatash: So do you need any help here?

Kanatash: Nah, I'm on top of it. You can head back.

Alt-Kanatash: (tips hat) Well then, cheerio. (vanishes.)

Kanatash: (turning back to kids) Alright now we have the paladin version of me. Now you're momma is a shinning exception of this but your average paladin is rather gullable. Watch. (walks up to Pally-Kanatash)

Pally-Kanatash: (brandishing sword) Back foul demon!

Kanatash: Actually, I'm not a demon, just a horror from beyond reality. I do believe there is a nice demon infestation over there though. (points through a nearby doorway to the lower decks)

Pally-Kanatash: (charging through doorway) For great justice!

Kanatash: We'll never see him again. Well we might find parts of him but you get the idea. Now last we have Towelie, who is a drug addled hippie. Now remember these people deserve only your ridicule. Watch this. (goes over to Towelie) So what are you doing?

Towelie: Getting high.

Kanatash: Really, well you seem to be out of stuff there.

Towelie: Really? I'm so high right now.

Kanatash: You know you've done so many drugs I bet you could get a good hit off of yourself.

Towelie: Wow, you're so smart. (begins lighting himself of fire and attempting to smoke himself)

Kanatash: (turning back to the kids) Remember kids, don't do drug. Drugs are bad, 'cause if you do drugs your a hippie, and hippies suck.

Towelie: (completely on fire now) This is some good ****. (giggling) I'm so high right now.
Lord Kale Fangblade

01-16-07, 02:09 PM		The alternate Naz'roth is chaotic evil rather than lawful evil. showing the battle between law and chaos rather than good and evil.

If it was Naz'roths twin, Naur, then they'd be fightning in melee since Naurs physicaly stronger and faster than Naz'roth. so he'd attempt to minimise the chance of Naz'roth using his magic by keeping him from being able to concentrate.
Though Naur isnt as gifted with magic as Naz'roth he's not stupid either. he'd never fight Naz'roth on Naz'roths own terms, or even on Naz'roths home turf.

i also assumed that a good alternate Naz'roth wouldnt join Lana.
Phantomcrossing

01-16-07, 03:44 PM		NJ26 phases through the wall of the Argonessen prison, before her are the chained Rose and Captain Jarlot.

NJ26: Captain, at last I have found you.

She drops to one knee and lays a hand firm on the ground, her ethereal presence marked by the misty nature of her form out of **** with the material plane.

NJ26: Strange liquid metal demon wolves were found in the bowels of the Freedom, bearing only to attack any living things in their wake....that and Erk's place is being assailed by alternate versions of everyone present...and I think Ketler cloned me again because I am both there fighting my double and here delivering this news and preparing to cut your bonds with adamantine shuriken.

The nina girl looks up as her form condenses and becomes less misty.

NJ26: But I must make haste, I fear there are guards that will be alert to my presence in (checks waterclock) 42 minutes when the rounds discover the sentry I dispatched.

Jarlot turns to Rose with a smug look.

Jarlot: See, 42.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-16-07, 03:45 PM		OOC: A :nonono: award for best portrayal of why you should not do drugs goes to Crystalforged.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-16-07, 04:05 PM		Alt-Ash: Still going by Ra-Tok Ash's alt ( Rogue 10, psion 1 Elocater 10 shadow Mind 10 ) Is a prfessonal assasin, calm and composed with an unearthly skill at being in the right place at the right time, often faitaly.

Ra-tok would side with Lana as calmy as any other patron, as soon as his fee was in his Kundarak acount.
DungeonJman

01-16-07, 04:35 PM		Wait, if these are alts of the people on the FF, shouldn't they have the strong internal desire to not kill people?
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-16-07, 05:01 PM		Wait, if these are alts of the people on the FF, shouldn't they have the strong internal desire to not kill people?
Bunny: That assumes:
1) That my Alt wouldn't like killing.
2) That I have an Alt.
3) That this isn't the FF, where there are only two rules, and #2 is "Rules are made to be broken………with as much force as possible".
rampant

01-16-07, 05:15 PM		Rashour - How did I get stuck taking you back home?

Teiza - Because Mother told you to take Mommy with us, and she talked circles around you to leave her here so she could keep an eye on Mother. Speaking of ditching you, Dorvos?

Dorvos - Hmmmm KYAH! *scroll of force cage*

Teiza - Cheese it bro!

Rashour - ... Sis is gonna kill me:weep:
DungeonJman

01-16-07, 05:20 PM		But since rules are meant to be broken, wouldn't that mean that your assumptions are worthless, then, since the rule is that we normally follow them? :bored:
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-16-07, 05:43 PM		OOC: It's not a rule that you follow them: it's what you choose to do. Just as I choose not to mess with what you or anyone else does. It's only a rule if it's enforced by someone else.

13: Also, it's about humor. Remember rule #1 "Insanity is more fun and requires fewer rules".
cypher_zero

01-16-07, 05:54 PM		Rashour: *Antimagic field* *Draws dual battleaxes* Time to kill sh*t.

OOC: Don't forget about those beholder eyes...
.
rampant

01-16-07, 06:12 PM		OOC: I know just needed to slow him down a bit.
----------------------------------------------------------

Dorvos - Hmmmm

Teiza - Good to go bro.

Haunting melodies fill the air of the ship, carried over the speaker system that has totally been there the whole time and I'm not just making up for my convinience.

As the music pouring forth from Dorvos's fife reaches the ears of the Defenders brilliant flames burst forth from their weapons bringing both heat and light to bear.

Teiza - Just wait until the song ends :evillaugh
------------------------------------------------------

OOC: Also if anyone wants they can send me a Blurb for their character to put in the wiki, especially the second gen.

OOUrial and OOCharles - Why are you looking at me like that
ratslinky

01-16-07, 07:05 PM		Gaz: So your my shadow alt what choice did you make let me guess you became lieutenant in Elina's army

Alt-Gaz: Yes

Gaz: So why don't you help by helping kill Lana *casts suggestion and charm person*

Alt-Gaz: Good idea *goes off*

Gaz: To easy. Now Esabar where is Elina?

Esabar: She went to the Obsidian city

Gaz: Yay I hoped it would be somewhere warm just make sure she doesn't notice us when we teleport in

Edit: By the way Kaizer he won't interfere unless Elina really needs help
rampant

01-16-07, 09:03 PM		Satnak - 1 hundred 2 hundred 3 hundred alternates

4 hundred 5 hundred 6 hundred alternates

7 hundred 8 hundred 9 hundred alternates

10 hundred 11 hundred 12 hundred alterantes

that i've blown to hell:D

--------------------------------

As Dorvos's song rises to its finally the flames change color to a ghastly grey.

Teiza - Eat ghost fire *****!

Lana - :confused:

With the lastnote the grey flame surges forth decimating the shadow thralls, and leaving a pleasant smoky odor.

Lana - Clever girl. She's not one of yours though.

Satnak - *tap on shoulder* No she's mine. *punch*

Lana - BY MOSE TOU MITCH!
rampant

01-16-07, 09:27 PM		Aomas ( Angel of Stone and Mist ) and Tirmek are duking it out on the deck of the FF. Aomas uses a two-handed sword where only the hilt and edge are made of razor stone, the rest is mist.

Tirmek weilds his incarnate hammer beside a myriad of called weapons.

The battle seems to be a stalemate. The angel lacks the skill to land a blow upon the canny Tirmek, while the young half-blood cannot harm the insubstantial mist portions of his foe, nor his nigh impenetrable stone components.

Aomas - Give it up! You lack the experience and power to create the energitic forms necesarry to harm me.

Tirmek - True, but i know someone who can crack your armor.

Aomas - All of which are occupied.

Lily - "Darkness beyond twilight. Crimson beyond blood that flows. Buried in the stream of time is where your power grows. In thy great name, I pledge myself to conquer, all the foes who stand, before the mighty gift bestowed in my unworthy hands. Let the fools who stand before me be destroyed, by the power you and I posses: Dragon Slave!" *Spell Smite**smite favored foe (evil outsider)*

Tirmek - Thank you.

Lily - Wait did you just admit I could do something you couldn't?

Tirmek - Yes your girl face mesmerized him long enough to get off that incantation.
Charles Phipps

01-16-07, 09:30 PM		Another mage icon for you and your Dragonslave use ;-)
DungeonJman

01-16-07, 09:35 PM		*Liam is wrestling with his alt, who is then blasted by the ghost fire, he then sees DungeonJ building something near the trapped Evil DungeonJ*

Liam: May i ask what the heck you are doing?

DungeonJ: Well, i'm just wondering if we can use the evil side of me as a power generator or a weapon, similar to how the weird/insane generator worked.

Liam: And he won't get out, because?

DungeonJ: I used a binding seal on him, i'm think that if i can convert his eldritch blast and the field of evil around him into energy with neither good nor evil tendencies, then we may have a decent weapon.

Liam: You are NOT thinking of...

DungeonJ: Yeah that... a giant laser cannon.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-16-07, 09:40 PM		OOC: Great response so far, everyone. Then again, I'm pretty sure only Charles has the slightest idea of what's coming. :evillaugh

And I haven't even told him all of it.

After this is over and done with, my avatar will be hiding so I can avoid the wrath of my characters for at least a month. :hides:

Just to help you all play them, the shadow alt's are resistant to most everything. Stone will break, ice will shatter, anything that requires biological activity to work (poison, disease, etc) will not effect them. Imagine, if you will, fighting water with martial skills. Light is really the best way to do any damage. It slows their regen and weakens their attacks.

IC:

Terra holds Lana in a stalemate as the crew fight the rest of the shadow alts. The assault was half-assed at best. They weren't really trying to kill anyone. Why?

Lana: You've grown soft. You know what must be done, yet you refuse to do it. And for what? Your 'loved ones'?

Terra: I know full well what you are capable of. I will not allow that to befall anyone else! Now what is your goal?! You are delaying us! What is your purpose!

Lana: Wouldn't you like to know. :devil:

-----

Yuan: Seems they were expecting us.

Elina: It's pretty much the welcome I expected. We are outsiders, after all. At least we aren't Vulkoor worshippers...

A grand force of Sulatar warriors stands ready. Elina could have just bypassed them, but she needed several artifacts to complete her mission. Angering the inhabitants wouldn't be the best course of action at this time...

At the head of the army, a large male in full body armor holds a dual bladed sword. Flames seems to course through the armor, revealing the presence of a bound Fire Elemental.

Warrior: What brings outsider children to these parts? State your business and we may let you leave.

Elina: I have come looking for the Chamber of Fate.

Warrior: *turns* Elder Ratha, what is the meaning of this? The one you would have me strike down is a mere child!

The Shaman from before warps in.

Ratha: Yes Hur'uti. Do not be fooled by her age. She is an abomination. The Promise Breaker is not to be underestimated.

Elina: *face palm* You've gotta be KIDDING me! I'm branded a destroyer here too? It's the middle of freaking NOWHERE! :mad:

Yuan: But also a place required in your efforts. It would follow that the Dragons would take every precaution to impede your success.

Elina: Do I have to go through all of you? I really would rather not hurt anyone.

Hur'uti: Spoken like a true coward. Draw your weapon.

Yuan: It seems rather pointless, though. Perhaps...a duel?

Elina: Ah yes, chose your strongest warrior. I beat him, you let me pass.

Ratha: Interesting...what say you, Hur'uti?

Hur'uti: The battle is already decided, but very well.

OOC: The duel in a little bit.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-16-07, 10:07 PM		OOC: Don't worry rampant. This was all part of the plan from the beginning. Satnak keeps getting the short end of the stick as far as killing the B.B.E.G., so here's her chance. Part of it, at least.

IC:

Lana: Ghost fire...not bad.

The alts reform much slower this time, but they still reform.

Lana: Too bad they cannot be killed.

Satnak: B*tch. Suck Incarnum!

Terra: No!

Satnak strikes out at her, only to pass through her form. Her hand does not, however, come out the back side. Lana smiles evilly at this development.

Lana: Welcome to hell. :evillaugh

She tries to pull Satnak in, much the same as Terra had done to Sora Maenya. But she gets nothing.

Lana: What...? *looks at Terra* YOU!

With a bit of quick thinking, Terra turned Satnak's impule into an advantage. The deicide bears a mark on her back, between where her wings would be.

Terra: Satnak, do not pull away.

Satnak: ...okaaaaaayyyy...

Terra: She cannot truly be harmed from the outside. She must be destroyed from within. That mark will allow you entrance to her soul without being consumed like all the rest. Now go. Free them.

Satnak looks at her funny for a moment, then does as Terra suggested. She disappears into Lana's shadowy form.

Teiza: Mom!

Terra: Stay where you are, Teiza! She will be back.

Lana: *shaking with rage* You...you..............YOU! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!

Terra: You will break soon. It is only a matter of time.

After a few moments, Lana regains her composure and just sneers.

Lana: :smirk: But time is the one thing you do not have...

-----

Satnak finds herself in a bizarre place. What appears from a distance to be a forest of warped trees fills the expanse before her. At her feet, instead of grass, dirt, or anything of the kind, there are lines of mystical power running towards the grove from all directions.

Satnak: 'Free them'? Why'd she have to be cryptic at a time like that?

With no better ideas, she heads towards the trees.
ratslinky

01-16-07, 10:35 PM		*As Elina prepares to fight Gaz reaches into his portable hole and brings out a picnic basket and a blanket to sit on he reaches inside and pulls out a sandwich and some lemonade*

Gaz: *Eating his sandwich* *in a slightly muffled voice and with crumbs coming out of his mouth* this should be good

Esabar: Yeah we can watch her fight why don't you just go past while their not looking and get the things

Gaz: Easier to let her do all the hard work. Besides I haven't had lunch

Esabar: :nonono:

Gaz: :waits: Hello some people are waiting for a death duel hear hurry up
DungeonJman

01-16-07, 11:24 PM		And that's where Lana is wrong.

OOKaizer: *holding a bunch of strings* DANCE PUPPETS, DANCE! Er, what did you say?

*fires the laser cannon at the alt Michael*

alt-Michael: Hah, it's not going to do a thing, only light attacks can hurt... *gets blasted*

DungeonJ: And what do you think a laser is besides light concentrated into a point so that it creates heat? Ok, this is really just an eldritch blast empowered by evil that had to be reversed so much in order to not be evil, that it turned good, and thus, uses light energy (from the reversed evil empowerment)

alt-Michael: Oh, you've got to be kidding *blast* MEEEEEEEEE!

*won't actually blast the main chars in this, just tryin to hold the line*
Kaizer_Ryu

01-17-07, 12:17 AM		OOC: Gaz wouldn't have any use for the items, even if he knew what they were. Things are about to get rather dicey. :devil:

IC:

Elina stands opposite Har'uti, the warriors of the Sulatar behind him, giving the pair a wide berth. Yuan waits on the opposite side, wondering if his suggestion was the right solution.

Elina: *forms mindblades* You still have time to reconsider. I have no interest in harming any of you.

Har'uti: That is your sole purpose, Promise Breaker. But you shall find the Gates of Promise far less forgiving.

He raises his dual-bladed sword above his head and recites an ancient chant. The blades erupt in flames as the Blade of the Burning Promise shows its true form.

Elina: Nice toy you've got there. You sure your mommy want's you playing with matches? :smirk:

Hur'uti says nothing, but begins his onslaught. A single swipe of the blades sends a gout of flames at Elina. She easily deflects it, but the distraction allowed Hur'uti the opportunity to close the distance. The crash of metal on pure psychic energy resounds and he brings the weapon to bear. His furious strikes are blocked at every turn as Elina bears the heat radiating from the weapon. Unable to launch an effective counter without resorting to less traditional means (her shadow powers), she merely takes the assault and awaits an opening. He was truly a master of the Blade. His attacks were parried, but there were no breaks. The heat from the weapon did not faze him even as it caused Elina's eyes to sting.

Hur'uti: Come, child! Is this the power of the Promise Breaker?!

Elina: Not even close.

With blinding speed, Elina pins one end of the blade to the ground, and parrys the other, holding it in place. She needed a strategy. This one was no ordinary foe. He possessed a dedication and intensity that rivalled anything she had seen at One Eye. He would easily have excelled there. Much like Tirmek, he may not have had the raw power she held, but every move counted.

Hur'uti: Most impressive. It seems there are competant warriors among the outsiders after all.

The pin required he either stay put or fight back against her. Instead, he relaxed his stance and slipped away. In one fluid motion, he spun around. Flames burst forth from the Blade, encircling Elina in a case of intense heat.

Hur'uti: It is a shame our duel has to end so quickly.

Elina: Don't count me out just yet.

The flames do not die, but instead coalesce into a ball at the end of Elina's raised hand. The look on her face shows a thirst for blood and battle, the kind a predator gets when it has zeroed in on it's prey after a long hunt. The fire's power is added to her own and returned to Hur'uti in a blaze that consumes him. His armor protects him from the heat, but it is so intense that it scorches the ground and leaves his armor glowing white. None of this really fazes him, till the ice hits. The ice sword pierces his chestplate, shattering the armor from the extraordinary temperature change.

Elina: Thanks for the boost. :P

Hur'uti: Insolent witch! *the mindblade fades from his gut*

He takes the Blade and touches the edge to the wound. The smell of burnt flesh wafts about as he cauterizes(sp?) it. Slowed by his injury, but now lacking the armor incumberance, he resumes his assault. Too late, however, as Elina strikes first.

She bats him about, aiming for the blade instead of her opponent. It was a symbol. A sign of strength and the focus of a dangerous vision. Steam rises about the field as she infuses Ice magic into her blades to counter the flames from the twin swords. The Sulatar, Yuan, and Gaz have no way of seeing through the mist, but they can still hear the battle raging.

Until, that is, they hear the snap of metal. Flames erupt out of the mist, and a scream is heard. The heat burns away the mist, and reveals Hur'uti's burned form still clutching the shattered remains of the Blade of Burning Promise. Elina had erected a barrier of shadow just in time, and so escaped the flames.

Elina: Are you quite satisfied? You are now short a powerful warrior, a relic of great power, and your pride. Let me pass.

Ratha: Very well. You may leave.

Elina: Leave? I cam here for a reason, and I'm not leaving until I have accomplished my goal.

Ratha: And that would be?

Elina: That is my business. But first, I will be needing that. *points at the staff*

Ratha: The Key to Fate. I see. So you know how the Chamber works, do you? I'm afraid this means my offer of release no longer stands.

As Ratha warps away, Sarah appears. She had locked on when Elina had shielded herself.

Sarah: Elina! *looks around* Uh-oh. Did I show up at a bad time?

Elina: Not really. Thanks. Gaz! Get down here!

Gaz: (i.h.h.) Crazzap! She noticed...

Yuan: What is your plan?

Sarah: We need to end this quick. Those shadow creeps are attacking the ship!

Elina: They have lost their champion as well as a sacred relic. We only need to take out the leaders. I'd like to try and merely capture them and order the people to stand down, but if we have to do this the old fashined way, so be it.

Commander Cobra: COBRAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

The legion of fanatics decend upon the group. Before they get to them, though, Gaz warps them inside the city, at least a mile from the troops.

Elina: What the hell?!

Gaz: Find the High Shaman. It will take their warriors some time to discover our location. Less messiness all around.

Elina: ...right. Good thinking.

The four spread out, hoping to find Ratha.
rampant

01-17-07, 01:23 AM		Tirmek blinks in.

Tirmek - Nice to see you listen occasionally.

Sarah - :P

Elina - Get a room:rolleyes:

Tirmek - Hyrd keeps trying to get Ivy in there. I figured i should leave them be.

Sarah - You're just glad to have him occupied with someone else.

Tirmek - Meh nice enough guy, just not my type. The shaman's likely hiding in the biggest energitic concentration.
-------------------------------------------------------------------

Lana - dooo the macarena!

Serene - Silly girl! :doh:

Terra - Stop messing around in there!
Charles Phipps

01-17-07, 01:48 AM		Lilly: I have a girly face?

Tirmek: Yep!

Lilly: You do realize that insults about feminity from a sex changer don't really work right.

Tirmek: :blush:
rampant

01-17-07, 01:56 AM		Tirmek - Who said anything about an insult? I believe I just called you cute. Given how you were able to beguile that angel into letting you complete that long-arse chant.

Lily - *Starts foaming at the mouth* must clean head from mental image!

Tirmek - Insults don't work, but I can still twist his perverted little mind like a pretzel.
Charles Phipps

01-17-07, 02:10 AM		Lilly: Well I do have other spells.

Tirmek: Like what?

Lilly: Power Word Kill.

Tirmek: And what's that?

Lilly: KITTENS

Tirmek: Oh come on, do you...

*A attacking Xen'drick giant from nowhere behind Tirmek drops over dead*

Tirmek: ....

OOC: BTW, loved the bit with Zella and Honor Harrington.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-17-07, 02:13 AM		When she arrives at the grove, Satnak realizes that these are not trees. These are creatures and the twisted prisons encasing them. Bound within she can see all manner of abominations, demons, quori, the list goes on.

Till she comes across a familiar face.

Satnak: Didn't I kill you?

Theronas: Perhaps in your universe. My own father betrays me and gives this bastard child, THAT I CREATED, his blessing!

Satnak: Your fath- wait...your father was the Shadow, wasn't he?

Theronas: What's it to you?

Satnak: Oh hell...

These creatures weren't working for the Dragons. Elina had been attacked and driven to her current goals by none other than the Shadow. It made sense now. Terra was originally the Shadow's chosen, after all...

Satnak: Gods damnit! I'm gonna kill that bastard myself!

???: Pipe down, will you? Just because I've been in here what feels like an eternity doesn't mean I don't like peace and quiet...

Satnak: Ok, I know you're dead.

Arijani: *also caged* Again, you're thinking your own universe.

Satnak: Heh. True. Well, boys...it's been fun seeing you again, even if it's the first time for you. But it seems I need to kill you. No hard feelings? I'm just going to enjoy this immensely.

OOC: OK, rampant. She can start smashing now. I'll describe the result when you're finished having your fun. Remember, the grove contains nearly every evil critter of any significant power, including the Rajahs, from her never-created universe. They've been drained for the most part, so it's kind of unfair. Satnak still doesn't get a challenge. :D
rampant

01-17-07, 02:23 AM		Satnak - ... You know while I'm here:D :devil: :evillaugh
----------------------------------------------------------------

Lana - Hey no stop it!

Lana's right index finger stabs itself into her nose.
------------------------------------------------------------

Satnak - You can pick your enemies, you can pick your nose, and now i can pick my enemy's nose:D

Ariajni - Didn't you break her nose?

Satnak - Note the maniacle grin:D

Theronas - That would be a yes.

Satnak - Well I know one critter perfect for this job. *astral construct*

A giant blue beaver manifests.

Ariajni - Ok the tree prisons were tasteful at least, the beaver is taking the whole nature thing too far.

Satnak - *pulls an axe out of nowhere*
Paulon

01-17-07, 02:49 AM		These creatures weren't working for the Dragons. Elina had been attacked and driven to her current goals by none other than the Shadow. It made sense now. Terra was originally the Shadow's chosen, after all...

OOC: Looks like someone's finally gotten the hint.
As Fela might put it in fancy mental pictures using the mathematical symbols and images of those involved:
Cats have Fur. Dogs have Fur. Therefor cats are dogs.
Elina is the Promise Breaker. Elina is the Chosen of the Shadow. Therefore the Promise Breaker has to be the Chosen of the Shadow.
Compare the logic involved in the statements. Meow.

*OOPaulon sits back to wait and see if his guess about Tirmek's sister is correct too*
rampant

01-17-07, 03:06 AM		Tirmek - SISTER! Dammit you two! I was promised mass homicede and you missed one!

Maladren - Sorry

Lily - I'm so ashamed
Charles Phipps

01-17-07, 03:17 AM		Maladren: I wonder what could have stayed Lilly's incredible bloodthirsty hack'n'slash instincts.

***

Flashback

Tirmekia: HI! I'm wearing a Japanese schoolgirls outfit!

Lilly: HELLO!
Kaizer_Ryu

01-17-07, 03:22 AM		OOC: Actually, the Promise Breaker is independent of Chosen status, much less which one. But considering the first statement, I'm not taking it too seriously. But that does help explain why one of my cats thinks he's a dog...

IC:

Ratha was dead when they found him, lying in a pool of his own blood.

Tirmek: Ew.

Lilly: Man...all that EXP...

Gaz: Where's the Key?

Sarah: *sniff* *sniff* I can't *sniff* quite make out a scent. Too much blood.

Tirmek: Where's the door it unlocks?

Gaz: How should I know? I'm not sure even Elina or Yuan know.

Sarah: Where are they, anyway?

-----

Elina stood back as the magical seal on the doors unfurled. Pushing the gigantic doors aside, she made her way down the steps. The chamber was huge, but probably worked for the giants quite nicely. This passage hadn't been used in ages. Spider webs, dust, and roots were everywhere. When she got a few dozen yards in, the doors slammed shut behind her, plunging her into utter darkness. Luckily for her, she could see perfectly fine.

Ratha had been murdered by...something. The style was reminicent of one she didn't care to remember. It was too much like what she had done all those years ago when she had fled the Forgotten Freedom. But this time, there was no blackout. No unexplained memory loss. The Kay of Fate had just been laying next to his gutted form.

She hadn't even bothered to look for Yuan or any of the others. She had to do this quickly. She unfurled her wings and headed down the hall at top speed, dodging rubble and webs in the process.

-----

Tirmek: Anything?

Gaz: I can't find either of them.

Sarah: There's some huge doors back that way that look to have been disturbed recently.

Lilly: *succeeds on his listen check* Uh-oh...

The Sulatar warriors have discovered them and are bearing down fast.

Commander Cobra: Crush the G.I. Joes! They will rue that day they messed with Cobra!

Random Warrior 1: Does he have to do that?

Random Warrior 2: At least he isn't wearing the outfit again.

OOC: Ok, unfortunately, it's really late and I have an early day tomorrow. I won't be able to do much till tomorrow evening. Just assume that Lana is still in the midst of her internal beating, Elina is still heading for the inner sanctum, and Yuan is nowhere to be found (yet). I need the kids to remain mostly isolated from each other and from the rest of the crew for the time being for the next part to work smoothly.

I'm almost done with this. Just bear with me. :bigeyes:
ratslinky

01-17-07, 03:36 AM		Esabar: I know exactly where Elina is and I can get you there

Gaz: So what are you waiting for?

Esabar: Two reasons a) It would ruin the plot line and b) Kaizer would be mad at our E.B.N.E

Gaz: Ah I knew there was a reason
urial angel of death

01-17-07, 08:58 AM		OOC: Please hold off on killing Lana until I use Volrath's alternates
Paulon

01-17-07, 08:58 AM		OOC: Actually, the Promise Breaker is independent of Chosen status, much less which one. But considering the first statement, I'm not taking it too seriously. But that does help explain why one of my cats thinks he's a dog...

That's exactly the point. Everyone has assumed it's an all or nothing matter - either Elina has to be both the Promise Breaker AND the Chosen of the Shadow, nor neither. If that's accurate logic, then the statement about cats and dogs must be accurate too, which is just a trifle ridiculous. :) Though not necessarily impossible on the FF I suppose. *:rolleyes: and waits for Fluffy to go for his throat*
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-17-07, 09:33 AM		Elina: Do I have to go through all of you? I really would rather not hurt anyone.

Hur'uti: Spoken like a true coward.
Bunny: Yeah, that's what they say right before they get beat by the farmboy.

OOcat: Really, cowards are the ones who hold to codes of beating people up. They're too afraid to try anything else.
rampant

01-17-07, 10:41 AM		Hyrd - MY IVY!

Pulls out a huge freaking gun.

Ivy - *poke* (i.h.h. a plushie gun?)

Bang!

Several shadow thralls are transmuted to plushie form.

Roosevelt - I HAVE MINIONS!
Lord Kale Fangblade

01-17-07, 01:30 PM		Sithis teleports in next to Tirmek, instead of armour he wears a black silk duster and his standard noblemans cloths, strapped to his hip is a new hand and a half sword. many pouches of holding are attached to his belt, in his right hand he holds his new staff. it's constructed from darkwood with two blunt curving prongs at the head and platinum designs. also about his waist is a black sash, which seems to irradiate some defensive magic. each of Sithis's hands are gloved and his pupils seem to have become a crystaline blue.

Sithis: Sorry im late. i was held up....

Sithis turns to see the Sulatar warriors closing in. he smiles evily as he glances at the staff in his hands. the runes across its length crackle with electricity. Sithis raises the staff at his opponents the rune above his eyebrow glowing with the yellow/red hellish light. Sithis speaks the invocation, an ethreal breeze blowing his duster about him.

a bolt of crackling lightning explodes from the tip of his staff striking the lead gaint in the face with a ringing thunder clap.
the gaint drops his neck blackened from where his head has been severed.
Sithis smiles evily and draws his sword, this was going to be fun.
rampant

01-17-07, 03:07 PM		Tirmek - Halt your blade!

Sithis - What?

Tirmek - Now is not the time for bloodshed! Even if we kill them all we only prove them right! Try to limit the death blows! Focus on non-lethal tactics!

Sithis - Please tell me you're not going soft.

Tirmek - Its called manipulation, even stupid soldiers can see which side is getting people killed. It might not be as quick or easy, but most of the problem is they think we will destroy them.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-17-07, 03:22 PM		Tirmek - Halt your blade!
Bunny: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
cypher_zero

01-17-07, 04:23 PM		As the giants rush towards them Tirmek and Sa’vor see a hail of axes fly, felling two more giants. They look up to see Rashour flying above them, his axes already returned to his hands.

Tirmek: Hey!

Rashour: What?

Tirmek: I just said not to kill them!

Rashour: Why? It’s more fun this way. Unless you’re just afraid of getting blood on your coat!
.
rampant

01-17-07, 04:24 PM		Tirmek - sarah got me this coat!
cypher_zero

01-17-07, 04:43 PM		Rashour: Awww… Looks like somebody’s in love! How old are you now kid? 12? Why don’t you wait a couple years before getting all gushy on somebody.
.
rampant

01-17-07, 04:44 PM		Tirmek - 13 and when we get back to the FF its you and me flyboy!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lana - La cucaracha la cucaracha! dadadadadada!

Terra - Dammit! this is serious!

Lana - Look at me I'm terra my E.B.N.E. writes me into long dramatic plotlines I'm cool.

Serene - hahaha

Terra - Will you get back to work in there?!
-----------------------------------------------------

Satnak - (singing very badly) I'm a lumberjack and I'm okay! / I sleep all night I work all day!

Theronas - I pray for the sweet release of death!

13 - over to you

Bunny - :D
cypher_zero

01-17-07, 04:57 PM		Rashour: Bring it kitty-cat!
.
urial angel of death

01-17-07, 05:49 PM		Three shadow duplicates appear next to Volrath. One is garbed in a silver robe and lacks any sort of symbiotic creature, graft, or extra appendage. The next is wearing a gimp-style outfit with many flaps and sleeves that would be useless to the average person, but on Volrath their purpose is disturbingly clear. The final double is surrounded in a maelstrom of magical energy as thought the world itself cannot accept his existence.

Volrath: *looking very confused* What did I do differently in your lives?

Silver Volrath: I have no idea. I don’t know how you have lived foul doppelganger.

Volrath: I’m the original.

SV: Then why does you skin ooze slime?

Gimp Volrath: He’s just using one of the gifts our Elder God father gave us.

SV: You lie! My father is a respectable human minister for the Church of the Silver Flame, not some horrific god of evil!

The rest: :OMG!

Maelstrom Volrath: I’m not even going to bother. Banishment

SV: *poof*

Volrath: Wait, how’d you do that? You’re all just shadow duplicates. You shouldn’t have a home plane to return to.

MV: Yes we do. We come from alternate Material Planes and were drawn here through the Plane of Shadow. It’s a lot like astral projection.

GV: I really don’t care how I got here. Just send me back quick! Terra will get mad if I’m gone for too long.

Volrath: Wait you and Terra…

GV: Duh, don’t you?

Volrath: No Terra’s married to Lisa.

GV: Who?

Volrath: Lisa Paladin of the Silver Flame, redhead, measurements are- *is cut off*

GV: Doesn’t exist. After being brought back from the Plane of Shadow Terra had no one else to turn to and fell right into my waiting arms. You’re really missing out man. She is one demon in the sack

Volrath: Not really, I’m fine with P/Y/R.

GV: P/Y/R that fairy *****?! Your universe is screwed up.

Volrath: Don't talk that way about my wife! temporal isolation
----------
from commentary crew room

P/Y/R: Yeah! He's defending me! Wait did he say wife? :eek:

13: How did you get here
-----------
GV: *fades from existence*

MV: *anime sweat drop* So do you want to hear my story?

Volrath: Sure.

MV: I come from the same parallel world as Lana. I ended up taking over the Forgotten Freedom, without her there to stop me. My power grew enormously. In fact I eventually realized that I had outstripped most of the other Great Old Ones. It was then that I began killing them and absorbing their essence. I became all powerful, but in the end I felt empty, like none of it mattered. I just sat around until I sensed Lana leaving for your world. That gave me hope for something more. Please give me purpose. In return you will become more powerful than you ever dreamed. Let us become one. *extends hand*
-----------
OOKaizer: You aren't very original.

OOUrial: Ya, I know.

OOKaizer: You know I’ll kill you if you do it.

OOUrial: Ya, I know.
------------
Volrath: *slaps away hand* I’d rather not have the patricide hanging over me.

MV: I will not be denied!

Volrath is bombarded by a torrent of chaotic energy. He tries to rise, but is unable to

Volrath: You can’t kill me.

MV: Yes but I can absorb you into my being and crush your spirit.

Volrath: *smiling weakly* Just try it.

MV: You inconsequential little-

Maelstrom Volrath is blasted backward by a blast of raw magical energy. A massive hole is ripped through his torso.

Myrr: I’m really sorry mister, but I just can’t let you hurt Daddy.

MV: Kid if you’d just stayed away you would have been fine. But now I’m gonna have to make you pay.

Expecting his wounds to have healed MV stands up, only to fall back down when he realizes they haven’t. There is still a gaping hole in his stomach. Blood is streaming out of it at startlingly fast rate.

MV: This isn’t right! Why am I not regenerating?!

Volrath: He’s special.

MV: You bastard! I am a god and you make me die like a filthy human! It’s not fair! It’s just not fair! I deserve better than this damn it!

Bunny: You melodrama time is up. Time to go.
ratslinky

01-17-07, 05:56 PM		Gaz: Nonlethal you say? :devil:

Tirmek: Why have you got that smile? cause I don't like it

Gaz: Well I could use some of my whelm tricks or I could use my poisons to make them wish they where and I think I'll go with the latter
cypher_zero

01-17-07, 08:05 PM		Rashour: So tell me fuzzball, why exactly shouldn't I just butcher them all?
.
ratslinky

01-17-07, 08:07 PM		Gaz: Because torture lasts longer
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-17-07, 08:20 PM		Chanse dances though the attacking alternates, a shimmer of Incarnum the colour of money as he shoots and vanishes. As he fights his sardonic voice recites something not quite a mantra.
"They'll call it Chanse, or luck, or fate.-"
*Kicks door open and sees redshirts fighting there shadow minions*
"The cards and stars will tumble as they will"
*Vaults over a baracade, shooting three Shade shirts, droping a wooden tile with Explosave runes on it as he tumbles up onto a table*
"You want to know your future? wait."
*Pulls a rope sending a chandelear crashing into the entranched shadeshirts*
"And still they call it chanse, or luck, or fait..."
*Bows as his pirates folow him in cleaning up the survivors*

( Cookie to who ever gets where I quoted the poem from )
Kaizer_Ryu

01-17-07, 09:06 PM		Elina finally reaches the inner sanctum. All is still pitch dark, but her command of shadows allows her to see objects and movement, though not detail. The vast chamber bears a summoning circle and altar, as well as several huge shelves of rotting magical tomes, broken jars of alchemal and spell components, and equipment.

Walking through the room, she can sense only those outside. A great many were gathered, but there were clearly six very powerful signatures. They would prevail, but only with the lives of a great many Sulatar. She had never intended for things to go this far. Her only hope was to complete the ritual as fast as possible and get out of here.

At the base of the altar was a hole for something. She pulled a finely crafted Syberis Shard she had...'borrowed'...from the Twelve's store house. It fit perfectly, and a blue light eminated from the shard. The light flowed out from the hole, following the lines at the base and spreading out till it filled the whole chamber.

-----

Sarah: Look, I don't care how much of a pompous ass you've become-

Rashour: Hey!

Sarah: But even you must see that killing is not the best route here. At least you father knows the difference between slaughter for fun and slaughter for survival.

Tirmek: Nor do we care how powerful you are. You can't take all of us, which is what will happen if you slaughter these people. They are not attacking out of malice. They are attacking because they believe we are a threat. I sincerely hope you've inherited at least a little of your fathers intelligence.

-----

Terra: Damnit, Satnak, stop messing around! That mark won't last forever! If you're not out of there by the time it fades, you're stuck there! This is not a joke! You've got an hour. Tops. Probably closer to half an hour.

Satnak: Now you tell me.

OOC: More after dinner.
cypher_zero

01-17-07, 09:18 PM		Rashour: First off, you don’t know jack about my dad. Second, killing them really is the best option. If we leave them alive, they’ll just keep coming after us unless somebody here has a way to knock a hundred giants unconscious for an extended period of time. Third, if we kill enough of them, the rest will probably get scared and run off. Fourth, I don’t need some pipsqueak telling me what to do. You could at least hit puberty first. Fifth, I’m not suggesting we all stay here, just me. The rest of you should be trying to find that little promise breaker of yours so we can get the hell out of here. And sixth! I’m just messin’ with the furball, so chill.
.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-17-07, 09:35 PM		Sarah: :confused: Giants?

Tirmek: Are you fighting a battle we aren't? 'Cause all I see are drow.

OOC: The Sulatar are a clan of Drow warriors that consider themselves the heirs to the knowledge and power of the Giants. During the elven uprising, they remained loyal to their masters. I'm playing them as fanatical. Any the kids kill become martyrs and only fuel the fire.

Sithis: Speaking of seeing things, I don't see Spoony Jr.

Sarah: What?!

Gaz: Yeah, he took off that way about five miutes ago.

Tirmek: And you didn't say anything why?

Gaz: I thought you knew and just didn't care.
cypher_zero

01-17-07, 10:07 PM		OOC: I thought someone said they were giants... oops.

Rashour: Behind the drow!

Tirmek: What are you talking about?

Rashour: The giants behind the drow! Don't you see them!

Sarah: Noo....

Rashour: *facepalm* Oh, I forgot you guys don't have trueseeing constantly active. They're invisible!

Sarah: ...
.
Paulon

01-17-07, 10:50 PM		Fela watches the battle of the shadow alternates against the crew of the Forgotten Freedom from high up the mast. Her teeth and claws were useless against the regenerating shadow creatures, nor were her other powers of more than momentary effect in disrupting them. All she could do here was watch, and hope that no alternative choice of her own appeared. Of the choices she had made, one was grim slavery, the next the choice of betrayal of friends or kindred, and the last a horror whose mere possibility still left her quaking in terror long after the destruction of the fear-drinking liche-things animated from the bodies of her kind. And with the knowledge of her powers that she herself lacked, even without the added power of the shadows any alternate Fela would be far deadlier than she. So with spells to enhance her senses she watched, hoping for a chance to aid, and praying to whatever power might be listening that the worst would not happen.

Terra: I know full well what you are capable of. I will not allow that to befall anyone else! Now what is your goal?! You are delaying us! What is your purpose!

Lana: Wouldn't you like to know.

Distraction. Disruption. Prevention of intervention. To judge by the scale of the attack, something significant had to be happening elsewhere. Elina had been attacked before, so probability suggested she and her friends would be at the heart of this. And the power that needed a 'goddess' to mask whatever was happening might still have made a mark that could be used...

Fela focused her will on the black stone tied around her neck. A thing of transport, far from the realm where it had been crafted. The linkages between the places of power it could once reach had been shattered by her transit, but perhaps they could be forged anew...

The crystal, formerly as black as the depths of the Plane of Shadow itself began to glow with a soft silver light. This place. Insanity. Chaos. Change. Show the stone. Be in the stone. The silver glow, the light of distant moons becomes brighter. Seek. Power beckons. Search. Where are the littermates? The wolf and the dangerous fox? Their friends? Where are they and power? Show the stone. Find them, show the stone. Brilliant silver light glows from the formerly black stone, and brightens to a flash that momentarily staggers the shadow alternates below the mast. And Fela is gone.

In the jungle near the Obsidian City, Fela appears in a flash of light. Here she can at least try to track Elina, Sarah and their friends. Maybe. Maybe a chance to change what the shadows want. Whatever that is.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-17-07, 10:57 PM		Rashour:……unless somebody here has a way to knock a hundred giants unconscious for an extended period of time.
13: Let's see: vacation slide-shows, depositions, political speaches, angsty monolgues, 2001, the AoO rules…
Rashour: Behind the drow!

Tirmek: What are you talking about?

Rashour: The giants behind the drow! Don't you see them!

Sarah: Noo....

Rashour: *facepalm* Oh, I forgot you guys don't have trueseeing constantly active. They're invisible!

Sarah: ...
OOcat: Rashour is off his meds again.
DungeonJman

01-17-07, 11:07 PM		Wait a minute.... *slaps his head* Oh great, so wait a minute, how does that work?

*draws a bunch of lines in the air*

So, if the alts do that, then that can happen, which allows those people to do that, with a pre concieved deal or plan by that guy, to be superior over those people. Or that guy could be setting up both those people and the alts, and still get what he wants.

(don't ask)

Aw man, i didn't think i'd have to mess with this "Chosen" junk a second (or third) time!

*jumps off the ship and misses the ground*

Well, that's certainly breaking the rules.

*then falls down the 10 ft*

Ouch! Well, better start moving. *under his breath* Stupid higher powers and high powered monsters of Eberron forming complex plans involving major plot twists
Kaizer_Ryu

01-17-07, 11:29 PM		Storm Giant: I bid 20 gold on the freaky uber-kid things.

Fire Giant: I bid 30 on them!

Hill Giant: I bid 20 on the Sulatar.

Stone Giant: 30 on the flying ponce screwing them all over.

Cloud Giant: 50 on some crazy magical happenstance disrupting the battle entirely!

-----

???: Well done. You have opened the doors and activated the room. Not to mention survived the trials to get here with little help.

Elina: Who's there?!

She turns, only to see Yuan walking towards her. He makes no sound as he moves, and the look on his face is one she has never seen before. His cloak is stained with blood, and his face is twisted in malicious joy.

Elina: :confused: I...but........what is going on, Yuan?

Yuan: I always hated that name. The little puke was so goody-goody it made me want to vomit.

Elina: Wh-what?! What have you done with him?!

Yuan?: Oh, he's right here. *points to his head* Just locked away. He's outlived his usefulness...

The veil Yuan always placed over himself to prevent scrying, aura detection, and anything else that could give him away fell. Elina was immediately assaulted by a powerful aura of Evil. Several, actually. This was not just one person. It was...

Yuan?: A conglomeration of soul fragments, yes.

Elina: What? How?

Yuan?: One of my abilities I retained for this form. I believe you know me as the deposed King of the Rakshasas.

Elina's throat immediately went dry.

Elina: ...Arijani?

Arijani: *bows* :devil: In the flesh. Or should I say soul? There's more than just me who'd like to say hello.

Theronas: Good evening, my dear. I do hope you like our little surprise. :devil:

The floor beneath Elina's feet glows red. She stands in the center of a magic circle and finds herself drained of all strength as it activates. She goes limp and sprawls to the floor as the soul-creature that was Yuan draws near.

Halester: You've grown up nicely, my grandaughter.

Krozen: But the little abomination has forgotten her place.

Haru: At last, I get to meet my niece. :devil: She looks a lot like Lana, doesn't she, sis?

Amelia: The blood shall flow and the fires of purgatory will burn away this pitiful world! *shakes his (her?) head* No! Let her go! This is wrong, daddy!

Halester: You will remain silent, Amelia! You are lucky our lord granted you this opportunity despite your instability! Shall we begin, gentlemen?

Elina was in shock. Her boyfriend was only one part of a larger whole. And that whole included both her grandfathers, her aunt and uncle, and two of her mother's greatest enemies. But, then...who was Yuan? Where did he fit into this puzzle? She desperately fought to move as Arijani continued.

Arijani: You'd like to know, wouldn't you? I suppose it's only fair to tell you. That was Ivy. Well...a part of him, at least.

Yuan placed several mystical items at points on the symbol on the floor. They were objects she had gathered during her search for this place. She didn't know why, but she had felt compelled to take them with her at the time. Yuan removed another object from his cloak. This one was entirely unexpected.

Her right arm.

Arijani: You came here seeking to perform the ritual to dominate the mist creatures. Too bad it's a dud.

He sets the arm at the base of the altar, just outside the circle.

Arijani: You want the seal to fade, right? We led you here to crack it wide open!

Elina's eyes widened in fear. Breaking the seal wouldn't just effect her. Sarah's were intertwined with her own. Break one, and you broke the other. It might even effect her youngest siblings. Such an overwhelming flow of power would surely destroy them! This could not happen!

Halester: All is prepared. Time to fulfill our bargain and be granted new lives.

Amelia: :weep: No, daddy! She's been through enough already! Don't you feel anything?! This is your grandaughter! *his (her?) eyes go wild* Our lord Shadow shall feast upon the suffering wrought here, and our reward shall be paradise!

Elina: (i.h.h.) What?! NO! He wouldn't do that! I've been betrayed again?! :weep:

Kitsune: I do not take rebellion lightly, especially after all I have done for you. Who betrayed whom first, hmm?

Then it hit her. Yuan was the one who had killed all those people four years ago. The viciousness, the vile nature of the ritual mass murders matched with the way Ratha had been butchered. The one Sithis had tracked all those years ago was Yuan. Sarah and Scias both smelled the foul odor of incalcuable evil on him, despite his shield. Even those shadow creatures that had attacked her and took her arm. All of it came back to the Shadow. Still unable to move, she could do little but cry silently as Yuan began his chant.

OOC: AND THE CURVE BALL! :evillaugh Not really. We all knew he was evil in some form.

Almost done. Remember, DungeonJman, you're an Entity. No plot-related usefulness at all. :D

Elina's the only one I don't want touched. The rest are fair game. I'm still waiting on Satnak's big finish, rampant. ;)
luna18moon

01-17-07, 11:45 PM		Slaypaw and her family face their alternates, sizing them up. Slaypaw's alternate had blank eyes but reddish wings, while Fluffy's was seemingly an ordinary cat. Mittens' had wings and a circlet made of reddish-black souls. The twins seemed like black holes, to both ordinary senses and supernatural. Shred's was nowhere to be seen. Slaypaw smirked.
Slaypaw: :rolleyes: Come ON, you can't be THAT pitiful.
Shred: Mom, they're practically invulnerable.
Slaypaw: Don't make me laugh. These guys'll soon be a memory.
Rip and Tear nodded.
Both: Programmed Amnesia!
Slaypaw: Shadows cannot exist without light. You can't exactly call us that. Therefore, though they look evil, we might be the shadows to their light. But we can't have anyone calling us that, can we?
Shred: That made no sense, Mom.
Slaypaw: :rolleyes: Kids these days. So Mittens, according to that logic what do we do?
Mittens: Brainwash them so 1. They can't remember why they're here in the first place and 2. They can't win against us, and eliminate the threat to our superiority :D !
Slaypaw: Think like a cat, Shred, not a tibbit.:nonono: I'm a pureblood and I'm more feline than you.
Shred: :bored: Yes mother.
Slaypaw: Don't give me that look! Don't forget that I can take away your knives!
Shred::mymy: I'll be good...
OOC: Darnit, I liked Yuan! I hate breaking characters like that! No way am I letting that be Nashvir or the so far unimagined love interests for the other kittens!
DungeonJman

01-17-07, 11:52 PM		Arrives outside of the chamber but is blocked,

*looks at the above comment on E.B.N.E. usefullness*

Well, now that i think of it, i really, really should have expected all of this coming. The inability to do everything, that's because Kaiser's right about the E.B.N.E's, Yuan being evil, I ended up believing that he was a good person, but considering... wait, there's no good reason that a good minded person could actually expect that.

Evil DungeonJ: *still trapped in the cannon power chamber*

Yeah, but it's rule 1067 of the evil guys handbook: When the hero believes that the villain has completely redeemed themselves, or the hero meets a person who appears to be perfect in every way, that person is obligated to be evil.

DungeonJ: I said no good aligned reason. Anyway, i think the final thing that i should have seen coming, which i did, a couple of posts ago, was that this whole Obsidian City thing was a trap. So, i'm just gonna sit here, stuck in the middle of the 4th wall, neither completely breaking it or not, unless i can mess with the rules of reality again.

*takes out a paper and begins to write contradictions present in the FF universe. Unfortunately, he can only think of one at the moment, which he hasn't already done.*
rampant

01-17-07, 11:58 PM		Beaver construct - *Gnaw*

Theronas - Stop it! Thats hurts! DON'T CHEW THERE!

Satnak - *swings big-arse axe*

Ariajni - Dammit!

Satnak - TIMBER!

The two prisons collapse.

Satnak - Ok I'm bored *EARTHBREAKER*

A wave of grey-psycarnum power ripples through the soulscape disrupting and shattering the energitic flow. The imprisoned souls let out their last futile screams as they are torn asunder returned to pure incarnum.
Paulon

01-18-07, 12:09 AM		Shock. Betrayal. Vileness beyond nightmare. The very air crackled with Elina's reaction to the revelation of her true enemies. The power she held! It seemed to fill the world! But so close to the heart of the emotional storm the location could be discerned. And Fela ran towards the Chamber.

Ahead were some familiar minds...

Cloud Giant: 50 on some crazy magical happenstance disrupting the battle entirely!

The air is split with the yowl of what seems to be a hundred enraged wildcats. Her fur crackling with sparks, Fela stands near the opposing forces, glaring at the youngsters, the Sulatar, and the giants with equal anger.

The image of Elina and the creature that has betrayed her strikes into the minds of all present. A second split image of those present fighting together as allies or lying dead apart is dimly percieved as the feline once again begins to run, in as straight a line as possible towards the servants of the Shadow, without waiting to see how they react.

Cloud Giant: I win.

Shortly after, Halastor feels a twitch in 'his' nose as a breeze blows into the chamber, preceding the arrival of one very angry not-quite-a-cat.

************
OOC: Rather an interesting coincidence; In the game where I originally played Fela, the rather unpleasant character who was allergic to her there also had more than one soul in the same body. Go figure eh?
rampant

01-18-07, 12:10 AM		Tirmek - You want to scare them off? *shifts into a girl*

Rashour - So now you look less intimidating?

Tirmek - Someone's never had a girlfriend.

Rashour - :mad:

Sarah - Oh this oughtta be good.

Tirmek - Gaz

Gaz - On it!
-fades out-
------------------------------------

Gaz - Get your peanuts!

Cloud Giant - (takes a seat) Oy over here! This is gonna be one doosy of a fight.
------------------------------------------

Rashour - I refuse to believe that worked.

Tirmek - With your permission we'll give them something to be scared of. I've been saving this for a while:D

Sarah - I remember this little bad boy.

Sarah and Tirmek step back and set themselves about 4 arm's lengths between their shoulders. They raise their hands and extend thier index fingers.

Rashour - Get on with it!

Sarah - :P

Tirmek - *Places her hand on Sarah's shoulder, then activates fusion powerstone and watches it crumble*

Obligatory seizure inducing flash.
cypher_zero

01-18-07, 12:15 AM		OOC: Umm... Kaizer? Arijani can't... be... there.... Terrek ate his soul remember? Hate to tear your plot-twist apart but... He's the only one that can't come back.
.
rampant

01-18-07, 12:17 AM		OOC: Clone spell Cypher.
Paulon

01-18-07, 12:17 AM		OOC: Maybe one of them was an Alt? The Shadow could have either slipped Terrek one way back when to prep for this plan, or nabbed an identical one for this from an Eberron where everything was the same except that Terrek didn't his dinner that day.
ratslinky

01-18-07, 12:23 AM		OORatslinky: I think Kaizer is talking about a shadow alt of Arijani

Gaz: This should be good

Cloud Giant: Mmm yeah *munch shew eat*

Gaz: Three Two One *all the giants fall unconscious*

Esabar: Good now get ready to nuke Sarah when they stop being fused because if the baddies beat Elina and get the seal to fade Sarah's seal will fade as well and she will kill Lisa T.F.O will make your shot strike true just don't kill her

Gaz: Sure thing

Darn Paulon and rampant beat me to it
cypher_zero

01-18-07, 12:32 AM		OOC: I don't think clone would do it. His soul was destroyed. Shadow-alt, maybe. Evil twin, sure. But not the real deal.

Sorry, I'm **** about continuty.
.
Paulon

01-18-07, 12:40 AM		OOC: Continuity? In a plot thread where Jarlot and Ketler accidently turned Satnak into a male deity with a typo on a character sheet that altered reality? :evillaugh
cypher_zero

01-18-07, 12:45 AM		OOC: Hmm... Sounds like something Charles did. I usually just ignore that stuff as far as actual plots go. No offence Charles.
.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-18-07, 01:01 AM		OOC: It's a soul FRAGMENT. Terrek may have ate his soul, but it's impression on him still remains. Elina did not intend to awaken it, but it took form through her powers some time ago. All will be explained later. Not now, this one's already too long as it is. The one in Lana is from an alternate universe, but the one that is part of Yuan is the real McCoy. Just a piece of him, though.

IC:

As Satnak emerges, Lana's entire being begins to collapse. Not just the semi-physical form, but her aura that was locked against Terra's. With her power broken, nothing can stop her death. Every ounce of power Terra had placed against her in an effort to styme her efforts came crashing down in one soul-shattering blow. She seemed to turn inside out as she exploded, yet the spray of blood and gore turned into ash, then nothingness.

With her grizly demise, her thralls lost all power and boiled away. The screams of agony rang through the ship for several seconds, then fell silent.

Terra dropped to her knees, the strain finally getting to her.

Terra: Obsidian City. That's where they are...

-----

Elina felt the seal on her stomach burning, trying to fight the magics assaulting it. She had nearly lost her will to continue. The only thing preventing her from giving in was the thought of her siblings. Sarah was happy with Tirmek, Nina, Deis, Scias, and Momo were just beginning their lives. They were more than worth fighting for, even if she wondered if her own life held any value anymore.

The first chant ended and the burning stopped. The seal had remained intact, but they had not been trying.

Krozen: We have precious little time! I didn't sell my soul out to a Dark God just to be returned to oblivion!

Halester: Patience! We are nearly done. Haru?

As Haru took over, he bent down and grabbed Elina's severed, yet still living arm. Turning it palm down, he picked up a sacrificial dagger and began carving symbols into the back of her hand and along the arm. The pain was intense. Elina could feel exactly what was happening as though it was still attached. After that, he flipped it over and repeated the process to much the same effect. He then stands and begins chanting again.

Haru: Flesh unbound, life restored. Darkness flows where light dares not tread. The power that binds the darkness shall fall, and light will take it's place!

At this last word, he comes down with the blade, aiming for a sigil on the arm. Elina shuts her eyes tightly, waiting for the strike that never comes. The clang of metal on stone causes her to open her eyes again.

Yuan: ...

Arijani: :mad: What is the meaning of this?!

Yuan: *strained* I won't...let you hurt her!

This was the voice of the Yuan she had fallen in love with. Was he trying to save her, or was this just another cruel trick to break her resistance?

Theronas: So he speaks up at last. You are merely the part of that pathetic boy that coveted this girl so greatly you would kill for her. What makes you think you can stand against all of us?

Yuan: *strained* I don't...need to.

Lilly: I knew you were in there...

Lilly stood aghast at the scene before him. He had heard Yuan calling to him, beckoning him to come as fast as possible. It seemed he had arrived just in time.

Yuan: It's about time...you showed up.

Arijani siezes control and Yuan's eyes glow bright red.

Arijani: You are too late!

Pulling the knife free of the floor, he stabs at Elina's arm again. A firey inferno strikes him square in the face as Lilly Fireballs his ass.

The arm is incinerated as well, and the pain is transferred to Elina. Her shrieks bring Yuan back in control, as he makes one final plea to his brother.

Yuan: What are you waiting for?! Smite, dammit!

Lilly: No! I won't kill you again!

Yuan: I'm not alive! I'm a :censored: ing soul fragment bound with a bunch of psychotic monsters! Leaving me like this is more torture than I can bear! :weep:

Elina's screams of pain have died off, and she stared at Yuan as he said those words. She knew it was true, but for all intents and purposes, he had just stabbed her himself. She had fallen in love with someone she could never be with. Someone so dangerous that his mere existance could bring about the very future of death and pain that she tried so hard to avoid.

Lilly: I...I can't!

Yuan: I am a part of your brother! Destroy this prison and I may return to him. You must, brother! By all that you hold dear, by all that I love you for, strike me down! Before I lose control!

Arijani: I will not be denied!

Theronas: Leave the whelp to me!

Halester: He's mine!

Haru: Kill the Paladin, first!

Amelia: Strike now, while our attentions are divided!

Lilly: :weep: Rrrrrrahhh!!!! *charge* Arcane Smite

The divided priorities of the personalities allowed no defense to be set up. The body they shared disintegrated under the force of the blow. The outsiders, lacking a complete soul, followed the mortals to oblivion. Yuan, however, had one last thing to say as he disappeared.

Yuan: Thank you, brother. And, please...






...take care of Elina for me...

OOC: Ok, I swear the next one is the last part. Should be at least. I'll get to it shortly. I've got something special set up, so, once again: Elina = No Touchy (last time for this arc, I promise!)
Paulon

01-18-07, 01:28 AM		Familiar scent: The idiot is here. Fela smells Lily's presence and abandons stealth to run into the chamber. Nobody deserved what that thing was likely to do to anyone who interfered. She was in time to see the ending, as the conglomeration of soul fragments shattered under the arcane smite. [I]Not so useless after all.[I]

The feline considers. The foe smashed, Elina is best left to her friends. The stone at her throat glows silver once more. A shimmering plane of red light glows in front Fela, patterns of gold tricking the eye into following them in an almost hypnotic fashion. Fela steps into the light.

On the deck of the Forgotten Freedom:

Terra: Obsidian City. That's where they are...

A plane of red light appears in mid air near the mast. A cat steps through it and yowls piercingly. Fela turns, looks back over her shoulder and yowls again for those present to follow, then steps back into the light, returning to the Chamber in the Obsidian City.
rampant

01-18-07, 01:29 AM		The sulatar can only stare in horror. A great Black Beast With Metallic red wings rises up from the place two children had occupied before. A feral snarl on its lips a cold cunning in its eyes, and its unnatural canine/feline visage were bad enough. The real frigh was the thing's aura. A crushing wave of terror and insignificance washes over those assembled. The creature continues to grow. Quickly it overshadows the tallest drow, the shorter giants, within a moment the creature towers amongst the tallest giants. A powerful howl crackling with energy washes over those assembled. The terrible sound splits the very earth. The creature turns towards the largest concentration of mystic power and nothing can bar its path.
cypher_zero

01-18-07, 01:53 AM		Rashour: Uhh... Not to be the one to critizie here but... I think you guys are "doing it" wrong. *snicker*
.
ratslinky

01-18-07, 02:30 AM		Esabar: The soul fragments but it might not be safe yet keep your weapon trained

Gaz: Hmm I can't sense the seal broken but who knows *mutters a quick incantation to ward his soul against draining in case Elina was evil*
Kaizer_Ryu

01-18-07, 02:51 AM		Rashour: Uhh... Not to be the one to critizie here but... I think you guys are "doing it" wrong. *snicker*
.
All those who have fled in terror stop for one moment, turn and:

*GROAN* :rolleyes:

Rashour: Oh, come on! You've gotta admit that was funny.

-----

The howl had torn open the roof of the chamber, and moonlight filtered through the split. The beast enlarged the hole and lept down into the chamber just as Lilly broke the circle and released Elina. Sarah and Tirmek split apart when they realized the battle was over, and ran over to Elina as she shakily got to her feet.

Sarah: :weep: Elina! What happened?!

Elina: *opens her mouth to speak* ...

Tirmek: :( Elina?

Elina: *tries again* ...

Lilly: Elina, ...can...can you say anything? :(

Elina: *again* ...

Elina's head fell in dispair as she shook her head 'no'. Everything felt so very cold all of a sudden. She couldn't even bring herself to cry. Tirmek was unable to pick anything up even through telepathy.

Tirmek: She's mute...

Sarah: No! Elina! :weep: *hug*

Tirmek: What happened here?

Lilly: I only heard the last part, but it seems...this time, she was betrayed in such a vile and flat out unforgivable manner... *clenches his fists in anger*

Lilly looked about ready to throw up as he remembered the extraordinary cruelty that had befallen Elina. Not just her, but a piece of Ivy's soul had been part of the ruse. He had been an unwitting participant in enacting something so horribly evil that words failed him to describe it.

Tirmek: ...I see. Sarah. Calm down...

Sarah: But-! :weep:

Tirmek: Freaking out isn't going to help her! What happened here was so traumatic, it has rendered her mind nearly paralyzed. She needs you to comfort her, not panic!

Sarah stares at Tirmek for a moment, then looks at Elina's strangely empty stare.

Sarah: *sniff* ...you're right... Sorry, sis. *hug*

Another, oddly familiar female voice echoes throughout the room.

???: *mocking* Awww... poor girl...

Achika appears on the opposite side of the broken magic circle.

Achika: :smirk: Such a tragedy...I offer my condolences, dear.

Lilly: Shut up.

Achika: :devil: Is that any way to talk to your mother?

Lilly: YOU ARE NOT MY MOTHER!

Achika: Believe what you want, then. I'm not here for you. I have a gift for Elina.

Raising her hand, the crystalline objects that had been placed on the circle rise and swirl about her. They shatter and the powder fuels a spell that lances out towards Elina.

The flash blinds them for a moment, and Achika is gone. Lilly gets up first and sees Elina next to him. She appears fine (considering) as she rises, but then quickly runs to Sarah.

The blue-haired girl is sprawled on the floor, writhing in agony as Tirmek tries to ascertain the problem. Just before the spell hit, Sarah had thrown Elina out of the way and took the blast head on. Scanning her, Tirmek finds no obvious injuries, but her internal magic flow has gone wild. Something was happening, and it wasn't good. It was then that he saw it. Lines, like smoke, were shifting under her skin and spreading outward. Down her arms, across her back, they seemed everywhere. They finally settled into a pattern strewn across her body. By all accounts, it was a Dragonmark. One that seemed oddly familiar.

Elina: ...! *grabs Lilly and shakes him*

Lilly: What? What are you trying to-

She grabs his hand and pulls him to a kneeling position. In the dirt she writes three words:

Lilly: Mark of...? Oh gods.

The sign Miko had spoken of had come to pass. Sarah now bore the Syberis Dragonmark of Death...

OOC: Ok, I'm done for now. I'm off to go hide in my quintuple-reinforced bunker shielded from all known forms of supernatural powers (and a few that arent known) in an undisclosed location for the next few weeks.
rampant

01-18-07, 03:00 AM		Tirmek - (pathing) Sarah! Let me help!

----------------------------------

Enter the mindscape Well outside the mindscape anyway.

Sarah - Where is this?

Tirmek - The realm between your mind and reality. If the effect gets past us here it will be significantly more difficult to dislodge later.

Sarah - (Sees the mark bearing down on the point that represents her mind.) What do we do?

Tirmek - What else?

Sarah - :rolleyes: fine, we fight.
ratslinky

01-18-07, 03:31 AM		Gaz: *Gaz come into the same place as Sarah and Tirmek* Why fight them you have done that so far and it hasn't worked

Tirmek: Well what else do you suggest?

Gaz: Follow the ancient adage "If you can't beat em get them to join you"
cypher_zero

01-18-07, 04:11 AM		Terrek teleports in

Terrek:: What happened here!?

Rashour: Dad! We just got here and found Elina mute and then this lady showed up and tired to blast her but Sarah jumped in the way and now she's got a mark like yours on her!

Terrek: D*mn it all to Khyber! I sent you to watch them so this wouldn't happen!

Rashour: There was nothing I could do! Elina ran off by herself and...

Terrek: Nevermind. It's not your fault. All of you. We're going back to the ship. Now. *mass teleport*
.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-18-07, 08:30 AM		Kitten: Hey, you, E.B.N.E.! Are you ever going to get back to me?

OOcat: No one cares (except Crystalforged).

Kitten: Oh, no you don't, I'm letting you do another post where you pitty yourself for not being able to keep going. *Kat-Fu* :monk:

OOcat: :eek: NOOOOOOOO! NOT THE CUTENESS!

Kitten: :bigeyes:

OOcat: :yuck: (begins vomitting up story(
**********
Boranal: Ale, wood-kegged, not metal.

Prince Bob: Yeah, baby! *Austin Powers theme*

Kitten: :rolleyes: These two are heroes?

Bruce: What is a hero but a person who goes out and does something about miscreants?

Kitten: I still don't get it: you can't stop evil and bad guys. They're a fundamental part of the world and society. You stop one and another pops up.

Bruce: Have you ever considered that if no one did anything about them that the situation would be infinitely worse?

Kitten: I……………:confused:

Bruce: Okay, people, next stop is Metrol.

Kitten: Who do we pick up there?

Bruce: A scion of House Cannith, framed by his brother, forced to flee with a prototype battlesuit. He hides in the secret places of his home city, coming out only in the guise of a warforged to battle evil and the world-conquering machinations of his brother.

Kitten: Scion of House Cannith who wears s warforged suit…………

OOC: ARGH! I need to do a Lex Luthor moment, but I don't know enough about him.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-18-07, 09:38 AM		Terra: :mad: I don't care how powerful you are. I will find a way to kill you for this.

Shadow: *laughs* Oh? And how do you plan on doing that? I think you forget your position.

Terra: Perhaps. But what you have done...I will never forgive. I was willing to chalk up your efforts with me as part of your nature. But this... *shakes her head* ...this is simply unforgivable. I will see you broken if it takes me all of eternity.

Shadow: :devil:

With so little effort as to seem an afterthought, Shadow hits Terra hard enough to nearly shatter her entire being. To her, it feels as if every layer of existance she has separates for a brief moment before recombining in the most painful way possible. Shadow fades as he speaks to her one more time.

Shadow: You may be a goddess, but you are still a flea. I have existed since the dawn of this world, while you are barely a stain on it's surface. You remain only by my will. Never forget that.

Terra returned to her body, even as blood leaked from her mouth. The strike had reached through the darkness beyond the Planes and damaged even her mortal form. Lisa wiped the blood away as Terra regained her bearings.

Lisa: How'd it go?

Terra: About as well as expected. But there is one thing I know. His threats are idle. He knows full well what it would mean to kill me. He can, easily, but it is not in his best interest. How are they?

Lisa: Sarah's sleeping. Tirmek won't leave her side. He said they had managed to contain the damage for now, and the Mark has yet to bind itself to her fully. Whatever Achika did, it's not going to be easy to reverse.

Terra: And Elina?

Lisa could only shake her head. Elina could remain like that for literally any length of time. She could speak up right now, or she could remain silent for the next millenium. All depended on when she recovered from what had happened. It pained Lisa and Terra greatly to imagine what she was going through right now. The worst part was the feeling of helplessness. They were supposed to be there to help her, to protect her. But when you're efforts are against an Elder god, there is only so much you can do.

-----

Elina tried again. But still nothing. With the loss of her voice, many of her powers had failed her as well. Her concentration was shattered. No mindblades, no spells, no shadow powers, nothing. She couldn't even fly properly.

She could only wonder what was wrong with her. With everything that had happened, she thought she'd be more upset. But she felt nothing. At least...very close to nothing. Along with her voice and concentration, it seemed her emotions had become a jumbled wreck she could no longer expect to work properly.

The worst part of the whole thing was, with the loss of her concentration, the wailing was back. This time, Kitsune wasn't there to block it out, either. All around her, memories of those who had died, whether here or elsewhere, continued to harass her.

Until she felt a warmth. Not physical, but somewhere in her soul. A soft, gentle touch that seemed to permeate ever so slightly the feelings of utter isolation that had overcome her. This was not the Shadow and there were no other signs of a presence. At the same time, Elina wanted to thank the strange visitor and ask what the catch was. The reprieve the warmth brought, though, was enough to cause her to fall fast asleep for the first time in nearly two days...
cypher_zero

01-18-07, 11:35 AM		Terrek leans over Sarah's sleeping form investigating her newly-aquired mark. Terra walks in behind him.

Terra: Do you know what it is?

Terrek straightens up and turns to face her.

Terrek: Unfortunatly, it is what it looks like, though the exact nature it a bit different.

Terra: What do you mean? Can we remove it?

Terrek: *shakes head* Not that I can see. Let me explain first. It seems that this mark is more in line with my own than any true dragonmark. As you know, I got my mark when I devoured Sa'vor's soul. Her's looks like it's similar in nature; she shouldn't have it, but despite all logic, it's there. To my knowlege, neither of you possess any blood of the line of Vol, course I could be wrong about that, but it also should only manifest in a full blooded elf or half-dragon elf. The same as I shouldn't have the mark, neither should she. I think

At this moment, Elina walks in to check on her sister. She barely crosses the threshold before she grabs her head and tries to scream, but no sound comes out. She collapses to the floor, writhing as though in agony. Without a thought both Terra and Lisa rush to her. Lisa scoops her up then moves her out of the room with a backward glare at Terrek.

Terrek: ... I... I'm sorry. She must have lost her ability to supress the voices. I'd help her, but I fear if I get too near the girl it will drive her mad. I'll have Rashour..

Terra: Don't. Lisa will look after her.

Terrek: But I might be able to diagnose what's wrong with her if...

Terra: I'll think about it. For now, I think you'd better leave.

Terrek: Alright. I'll do some research and see what I can come up with on the mark. As for Elina... Here *hands her a scroll* It's a spell called Solitude. It'll create an extra dimentional space where she can rest. It'll block the voices and all other noise as well. It should help her sleep.

Terra: Thanks.

Terrek teleports out, returning to Teseris where he begins going through his vast library, pouring over book after book...
.
rampant

01-18-07, 12:07 PM		Sarah (still asleep) - umh uun

Tirmek - Mrs. Branford, Mrs. Hopeorge I think she-gack!

Terra - What is it?

Lisa - Is something wrong...:heehee

Terra - *snicker*

Tirmek is once again trapped by the sleeping Sarah.

Tirmek - *sigh* That's it! I'm having Hyrd make her a Plushie... As soon as she lets go.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-18-07, 12:45 PM		(OOC: Just to double check but where is Yaun/Arijani now? I have plans :mage: )
Lord Kale Fangblade

01-18-07, 12:51 PM		Naz'roth and Tara are also looking at the mark, Sithis stands in the corner his eyes closed. Both Naz'roth and Tara still possess healing wounds, Naz'roth isnt wearing his armour currently, since it was damaged in his battle with his own alternate. Tara has several bruises on her face and and one of her hands is bandaged. Terra sits on a chair next to her daughter

Naz'roth: It's almost exactly like Sa'vors. there are one or two differences but im not an expert on the mark of death or even dragon marks, Sa'vor was one of the few in history to even possess one. what do you think my love?

Tara: *sighs* i never even saw Sa'vor use it once. ever. i dont think even he knew what power it possessed, and if he did he didnt tell me about it. Sithis, in your home reality where there many whom possessed the mark?

Sithis: *shakes his head* only three i knew of. My Grandfather, My uncle Raith and my sister Thira. I'd heard legends about Sa'vor using his mark. during the rise It was told that he quelled a whole region of land but with one use... but the powers it wields where never mentioned. Uncle Raith never used his either, he preffered to use his spells. My sister had only just manifested it before i left. she was going to train under Raith because Sa'vor was too ill. if anyone knows about it, it will be Sa'vor or Terrek.

Tara: if only we could ask Sa'vor.

Terra: no. Terrek said he'd prefer not to awaken him. he didnt tell me why, but he was adamant about it. do you think Terrek has used the mark?

Naz'roth: *shakes his head* he's a cuatious one. if anything he probably knows what it does. and thats only assuming Sa'vor knew or told him. we dont know any information to help you, but we'll research as best we can.
hopefully the Dark Libary will yeild some information. if not I'll go through my other sources.

Tara: I'll go through Sa'vors old documents, i'll see if he mentions anything about it. Im really sorry we cant help more, but The Citadels in rather a bad shape, if you need anything just send us a message.

They fade out.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-18-07, 01:31 PM		Shadow: You may be a goddess, but you are still a flea. I have existed since the dawn of this world, while you are barely a stain on it's surface. You remain only by my will. Never forget that.
Bunny: Famous last words before being killed by the farmboy.
DungeonJman

01-18-07, 02:08 PM		*creates a column of superheated air, which flings him up into the air, before landing on the ship with both blades drawn*

Where'd he go? Darn it! *resheathes blades* I didn't have the clarity of where he was the first time, and since then he keeps vanishing when i try to hit him!

Oh well, at least this whole mess is over. Too bad about Yuan/part of Ivy's spirit though. Unless...
urial angel of death

01-18-07, 03:41 PM		Lisa could only shake her head. Elina could remain like that for literally any length of time. She could speak up right now, or she could remain silent for the next millenium. All depended on when she recovered from what had happened. It pained Lisa and Terra greatly to imagine what she was going through right now. The worst part was the feeling of helplessness. They were supposed to be there to help her, to protect her. But when you're efforts are against an Elder god, there is only so much you can do.


Volrath: :teach: Excuse me the Shadow is not an Elder God. They have been around for all of existance, not simply the life-time of you cosmology. They a have always been and always will be. The Shadow is one of the children god and ultimately inconsiquencial. He will die with your world if not before that, and unlike mortals there is nothing he can directly do to prevent it.
Charles Phipps

01-18-07, 03:48 PM		Volrath: :teach: Excuse me the Shadow is not an Elder God. They have been around for all of existance, not simply the life-time of you cosmology. They a have always been and always will be. The Shadow is one of the children god and ultimately inconsiquencial. He will die with your world if not before that, and unlike mortals there is nothing he can directly do to prevent it.

:coolcthul: At least that's what we tell people.
DungeonJman

01-18-07, 05:08 PM		You're both wrong, the Shadow is literally what his name suggests: the shadow of another deity. He was created when Aureon sacrificed his shadow and his evil nature (or something along those lines) in order to gain more magical power, and as a part of the ritual, the shadow became sentient and gained the evil that Aureon gave up. So if he was to be classified, it would be as the shadow or "child" of a child deity.
Charles Phipps

01-18-07, 07:15 PM		Rose: You just wish this world resembled the campaign setting guide more.

DungeonJman: My OCC knowledge should make me a God here!
DungeonJman

01-18-07, 07:20 PM		No, nor would i wish that as it would disrupt the balance of things and...

HEY!

*begins sweeping a giant metal skull away with a broom*

well, that's what happens when runescape deities stick themselves in your head.
cypher_zero

01-18-07, 07:20 PM		Rashour: Hey dad?

Terrek: (Not looking up from the book he's reading) Yes?

Rashour: Well, I was thinking, maybe we could try to save Yaun.

Terrek: *sigh* Son, Yaun was never really a full person. He was only a fragment trapped in with all those others. To bring him back would mean bringing back all those others; something that he would never want.

Rashour: Yea, but I was thinking, if we could isolate just his fragment, we might be able to find a way to...

Terrek: You mean use the fragment as a framework to build upon essentially re-creating the lost parts of him? Hmm... It could work; I'll look into it. But first you'll have to find what remains of his essence. Here (tosses Rashour a glowing crystal), that's a soulshard. It will store his essence if you can locate it. That will in itself be a task; if his essence still esists, it's likely on Mabar.

Rashour: I didn't figure it'd be easy. I'm going to go see if I can get any of the others to help. Thanks dad! (runs off)

????: His presence didn't seem to have much of an impact.

Terrek: We don't know that it was supposed to. The future is yet unwritten.

????: And yet for me it is the past. These latest events transpired exactly as I remember them.

Terrek: But Rashour did not exist in your reality.

????: No... He did not and he could be the key to changing this realm's future but it is not certain.

Terrek: The future never is. We'll just have to wait and see...

OOC: More from me after the weekend. I'll be working all weekend so I won't be able to do anything with this till monday.
.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-18-07, 07:37 PM		As rashour heads off a tall birdlike figure apears beside him.
Ash "Greetings, it seems we are of parralell purpose young Sir."

Rashour "Oh? I thought you were off on that contest any way?"

Ash "Elocator, I am where I chose to be. You want the bright part, the part that is Yaun, no more?"

Rashour "That is so. Why?"

Ash "The rest is mine."

Rashour "Hes dead, in mabar, what rest?"

Ash "No, Ive dealt with thigs like this before the shrapnel of departed souls is not so easy to deal with. But There are ways, and he can be hunted."

Rashour "Why do you care?"

Ash "We have nothing but the lives we touch, the kin we claim. Those are few, and moast hardly remark upon me, its something of a penitance. and other reasons. You will get what you seek, and I, but the battle is mine."

Rashour "very well."
DungeonJman

01-18-07, 07:38 PM		Sorry Rashour, i don't think there is a way to properly bring back Yuan in a way that he would want. I already calculated how to do this, and the only way to fully get him back is to do something so evil that it won the "This technique is so evil that both Sasori and the Emperor have used it and approve it." award.

*In the background, the Emperor and Sasori are giving :thumbsup: :thumbsup: and both are laughing evilly :evillaugh: :evillaugh:*

Rashour: But i already have a way to get his soul back in the right way.

DungeonJ: The problem's not getting the soul, but since it's only a fragment, you have to get enough blank soul energy to reform it into a complete soul. That is where you have moral problems in bringing it back.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-18-07, 07:49 PM		(OOC: I dont care about Yaun, but I need a worthy target for ash in all this so I can stage the fight with him and his Alt for wich I have planned. I am a shade disapointed that Yaun turned evil just when I was about to take an excuse for agreat line from Firefly. Meh it will keep)
urial angel of death

01-18-07, 08:00 PM		You're both wrong, the Shadow is literally what his name suggests: the shadow of another deity. He was created when Aureon sacrificed his shadow and his evil nature (or something along those lines) in order to gain more magical power, and as a part of the ritual, the shadow became sentient and gained the evil that Aureon gave up. So if he was to be classified, it would be as the shadow or "child" of a child deity.

Volrath: Child deity is a catch all term used by the Great Old Ones and Elder Gods to describe the lesser being who consider themselves "gods". While it once was a true classification it is no used as a general catagory and derogatory term for these "deities". Fortunately the things from beyond your existance don't have any PC regulartions and therefore can't get in trouble for any racial slurs we make again you jellies. *looks at :coolcthul * Shh.
urial angel of death

01-18-07, 08:02 PM		Kerrith: I feel lonely and unwanted.

Volrath: Shut up filthy jelly.

Kerrith: Why have you just started using that term?

Volrath: What are you talking about? I've always been racist you crusty pudding.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-18-07, 08:18 PM		OOC: I just used the term Elder god to distinguish between Terra (new) and the Shadow (old).

IC:

Ivy: Sorry guys. Yuan can't come back.

Ash: Why not?

Ivy: Because he was part of me, and when he was released, I got him back.

Rashour: Well, that was a bust. Do you have his memories as well?

Ivy: That smite REALLY hurt. Think of a liquid Keelhauling combined with a Bigby's Crushing Tactical Nuke up the wazoo. While listening to Devon's poetry. So not really.

Ash: The first two I can handle. You need Diety level saves to survive against that poetry. What about the rest of them?

Ivy: Dolurrh. That's all I remember. Elina once explained the soul fragments to me. They cannot survive long under normal conditions. They must have a powerful attachment to a location in order to stay. A traumatic death, powerful emotional attachment, etc. Similar to ghosts, only unable to effect anything. Unless, of course, boosted through Elina. Something about her gives them form.
urial angel of death

01-18-07, 08:29 PM		Izzy and Satnak approach a ticket desk at the newly opened Trans Atlantic Subway Tunnel.

Izzy: Amazing what engineering can do these days. Two tickets please.

Satnak: Yeah I guess.

Ticket Seller: That'll be six hundred dollars.

Izzy: So you've never been on it before then I take it? We don't need any money. *waves his hand*

Ticket Seller: No I guess you don't.

Satnak: Did you just-

Izzy: Shh.
DungeonJman

01-18-07, 08:38 PM		Why does the Shadow have to keep moving his lair! I thought that we found the hideout of the deities.

Evil DungeonJ: *still inside the seal* We showed a bunch of level 60 guys the location by accident, remember? The entire place is now comprised of high level adventurers looking for whatever loot remains.
Paulon

01-18-07, 09:36 PM		OOPaulon: I can think of another reason the Shadow might be having to move...
The Fury might still be affected by what Silver did to her. She seemed to be enjoying it back when Silver took steps to punish the Dark Six for messing with her flying :pile: machine, and the Shadow was the first thing she saw. :)
urial angel of death

01-19-07, 12:12 AM		OOC: Tired, so tirde. I will have more way far future tomorrow. I just need to catch up Satnak's storyline with the other peoples. But it can wait OOUrial sleepy :zzz:
rampant

01-19-07, 12:15 AM		Tirmek - I'd advise she pick up a hobby. Something she can do just for herself.

Terra - That's pretty good advice.

Lisa - Now here's some for you. Sleep, you've been trying to help the girls so much that you've near depleted yourself.

Tirmek - :zzz:

Sarah - :zzz:

Terra - cute
Kaizer_Ryu

01-19-07, 12:35 AM		Next morning

Tirmek: Leg...cramping...but...can't...move...

Sarah: *yawn*

Tirmek: Finally!

Sarah: :zzz:

Tirmek: :weep:

*later*

Sarah: *sitting up* Huh...? What happened? Where's Elina?!

Lisa: Calm down, calm down... Elina's here and safe.

Elina: *smiles weakly* ...

Sarah: ...why do I hurt everywhere?

Terra: Do you remember what happened?

Sarah: Kind of... We had just found Elina-

Tirmek: Can you let go, please?

Sarah: Oh! :embarrass Sorry.

Tirmek: Freedom! Blasted cramp...

Sarah: ...then she couldn't talk. Yuan was gone...and then...?

Lisa: Is that all you can recall?

Sarah: ...no, there was someone else... Who was it...? Achika! She said she had a gift for Elina and cast some kind of spell at her. It's...kind of fuzzy after that.

Tirmek: You threw her out of the way and took the hit yourself. Look.

He points to a mirror nearby, and Sarah can hardly believe her eyes. Her arms, what she can see of her torso, her neck, and even part of her face is covered in a Dragonmark.

Sarah: That...wasn't a dream? *tch*

Wincing, Elina guides her back to the bed as the previous nights events sort themselves out again.

Sarah: Right...now I remember... I just...couldn't stand the thought of something else happening to Elina. I reacted without considering what could happen. It could have been a Death spell for all I cared...

Elina: *hug*

Terra: Can you stand?

Sarah: Yeah. I'm just sore. *stomach growls* ...and hungry apparently.

Lisa: :) That we can do something about.
rampant

01-19-07, 01:01 AM		Tirmek - 300 creds and 2 bags of Ivy's favorite candy.

Hyrd - Deal. Hyrd get to work now, have payment ready for next week.
Charles Phipps

01-19-07, 01:15 AM		Lilly: Sigh. I wish I still had Elina. What happened with Yuan scares....

*Elina walks over and snuggles his arm*

Lilly: ....

*Lilly looks up to the sky*

Lilly: I wish for a million sovereigns and a +12 Hackmaster!

*nothing happens*

Lilly: Damnit!

Elina: Bwah boo baa baooo

*Snuggle*

Lilly: Oh no! Elina's brain has broken just like Haley's in the Order of the Stick! Whatever will I do to break the curse.

*Elina gets on his back to piggy back ride him before falling asleep contentedly*

Lilly: Well as long as she's not hurt by it...

OOC: BTW, i don't know if I mentioned it but Hyrd is my new favorite character.
rampant

01-19-07, 01:45 AM		Back at work

Lily - What I want to know is how did I end up stuck with your soul fragments debt.

Hyrd - Hyrd pull string with Tirmek.:D Get Ivy off, so Hyrd can hug Ivy more.

Ivy - There are definite upsides to dating a plushie master. Now make with the burgers! Double egg on both.

Lily - Hate Tirmek!
--------------------------------------------------------------------

Sarah - Its perfect!

Tirmek - I figured since you kept grabbing me in your sleep this would be a good idea. (i.h.h. I need time to heal)

Tirmek has presented Sarah with a plush kitten. It has deep brown eyes and a green collar that reads "Tirmek".
ratslinky

01-19-07, 02:22 AM		OORatslinky: Hmm seeing as I can't think of anything to do with Mareth I am going to abandon that idea and wipe her entry from Wiki.
Charles Phipps

01-19-07, 02:45 AM		Hey I liked her.

Just have her show up. Thats enough
Paulon

01-19-07, 03:06 AM		Just have her show up. Thats enough

I'll second that. Bring her in and see what ideas interaction with the lunatics sparks. One of my favourite characters in an online game was created as a throwaway joke. I wound up asking myself what would make someone walk repeatedly through a portal into a suicide deathtrap, over and over...
The character in question wound up with the most detailed background of any I've ever played, with almost 5 years of RP before I left the group. All from a character intended as a joke that I'd never use more than once.

*grins evily* For that matter said character as of the time of her retirement would interact amusingly with the FF. Something to consider when I have more time to write an intro. I can just imagine how certain members of the crew would react.
ratslinky

01-19-07, 03:16 AM		OORatslinky: Well unfortunately I already deleted her but seeing as it is the same as the one I posted here I'll just retrieve it
cypher_zero

01-19-07, 03:24 AM		OOC: I just used the term Elder god to distinguish between Terra (new) and the Shadow (old).

IC:

Ivy: Sorry guys. Yuan can't come back.

Ash: Why not?

Ivy: Because he was part of me, and when he was released, I got him back.

Rashour: Well, that was a bust. Do you have his memories as well?

Ivy: That smite REALLY hurt. Think of a liquid Keelhauling combined with a Bigby's Crushing Tactical Nuke up the wazoo. While listening to Devon's poetry. So not really.

Ash: The first two I can handle. You need Diety level saves to survive against that poetry. What about the rest of them?

Ivy: Dolurrh. That's all I remember. Elina once explained the soul fragments to me. They cannot survive long under normal conditions. They must have a powerful attachment to a location in order to stay. A traumatic death, powerful emotional attachment, etc. Similar to ghosts, only unable to effect anything. Unless, of course, boosted through Elina. Something about her gives them form.
OOC: Well sure, kill that little plot before it even begins.

OOcypher: Hey Kaizer, can we bring back Yaun?

OOkaizer: No.

OOcypher: But...

OOkaizer: No.

OOcypher: We could just....

OOkaizer: NO!

OOcypher: Aww, c'mon...

OOkaizer: NO! :tantrum: He's dead and he's going to stay dead! You can't bring him back!

OOcypher: Aww....
.
Charles Phipps

01-19-07, 04:16 AM		Yuan: Whew, I've reconstructed myself out of pure love for Elina. Now I can go back to my Sexy Girlfriend and our little adopted Rooseveldt.

*Elina snuggles Lilly on his backside*

Yuan: ELINA! IT IS I!

Elina: Bloop blap blaoo. *she smiles as she holds onto Lilly*

Yuan: Oh no! She cannot see me!

Roosevedlt: Man, am I ever glad that Yuan is gone. Thank goodness Elina has found true love with Lilly!

Yuan: *slaps face* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-19-07, 08:23 AM		Yuan: ………NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Marish: Hail Jarlotpalazzo!

Tifa: Hail—*trickle of blood, collapse*

Jarlot: :confused: Since when did Marish become my obsessed lacky and Tifa the deathly ill princess from another planet?

Marish: As imaginary characters our health is directly related to our use! the only ones who can avoid this fate are lesser-used! But they are all scum! SCUM! NOT FIT TO EVEN LICK THE DISGUSTING LEAVINGS OF THE BOOTS OF J.A.R.L.O.T.!

Tifa: Hail—*girk*…

Marish: OhgreatJarlotpalazzoIfeel *leap* suchasenseof—*glomph*

Redshirt: Wait, aren't you supposed to blow her away or something?

Jarlot: What, I like this. :D
**********
Meanwhile Rose—sporting a giant afro—is facing down a group of Sulatar

Rose: …after they kept my fair Zella in an iron mask, which I only just now removed as she lay dying from being cut in half—

Sulatar Shaman: No, look, it didn't manage to cut off anything important.

Rose: …as she lay bleeding from a near-fatal wound—

S.Sh.: We could always cast heal.

Rose: I cannot simply let you go unpunished for trying to kill her.

S.Sh.: Listen, it was an accident—

Rose: I will not listen to anymore of your lies! (pulls guns out of afro) RARRGH! *charge* YAAHHHHHH!
Kaizer_Ryu

01-19-07, 09:10 AM		OOkaizer: NO! :tantrum: He's dead and he's going to stay dead! You can't bring him back!
Bunny: :rant: IT'S ABOUT :censored: ING TIME SOMEONE AGREED WITH ME!!!!

OOC: Sorry, I didn't really think anyone'd want to bring him back. I made his death honorable and the near culmination of an epic plot, not to mention it's kind of important for future stuff that he remain in his proper place.

Yuan as Pedro seems appropriate, though.
Darakhoranon

01-19-07, 09:42 AM		Suddenly a rift in time and space opens on one of the decks of the Forgotten Freedom. Out steps a human clad in leather armour and armed with a longsword. He doesn´t really look unusual - but then again, this is the FF, so golden reptilian eyes might be considered "unusual" somewhere else...

Aurixirthos:
Damn! I REALLY hate those stasis-fields. If I ever find out who was behind that, I´ll make him regret it!

So, does anyone even remember me?

And could someone please give me an update which one of the ubers is still around? Or was added to this madhouse?
Kaizer_Ryu

01-19-07, 09:48 AM		The Wiki (http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Main_Page) is mostly up to date. Probably wouldn't hurt to read the last 10 pages or so and get up to speed as far as what's happening right now.
Phantomcrossing

01-19-07, 09:57 AM		(I'm never up to speed on what's going on right now...though Norbaz is now always around)

See Norbaz...In the kitchen during mess...poisoning the redshirts who annoyed him earlier in the day.

See Norbaz...when the crew gets shore leave...pulling mid profile assassinations for profit.

See Norbaz...making damn sure he's moving silently while baking that Soufle (how the hell is that even spelled)

See Norbaz...scrubbing pots because no one's been given KP duty in a few weeks.
rampant

01-19-07, 11:17 AM		Ketler - Why am I always missing parts?

under a work table

Dorvos - :D

Scias - :D

Momo - :D

Teiza - :plotting:
----------------------------

Momo's room

Momo - Dump the parts over there guys, start sorting by material.

Teiza - And give me the crystal components.

Momo - Except for the auditory units that's Dorvos's gig. Scias grab the parts from that wolf.
-------------------------------
In the Dining hall at the Eighty Empress academy.

Corre - *munch*crunch*chomp*

Other students - *anime sweatdrop* *scoot away*
urial angel of death

01-19-07, 03:22 PM		OOC: Seeing as her stuff isn't being done. Would anyone mind if I used Kitten in her quest to find goodness in the hearts of men/women?
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-19-07, 04:48 PM		OOC: Seeing as her stuff isn't being done. Would anyone mind if I used Kitten in her quest to find goodness in the hearts of men/women?
OOC: I do mind, because she's in a certain of my universes right now, and I can get very picky about what I'd let happen there. Sorry, but it's the same as when I don't mess with your special plotlines.
Charles Phipps

01-19-07, 05:20 PM		OOC: But CLONE KITTEN is available!

Ketler: But don't you want to cuddle me?

*Scamper*
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-19-07, 06:16 PM		OOC: But CLONE KITTEN is available!
OOC: Can we avoid cloning children? Alts, okay, but then it would be quite the same Kitten.
Ketler: But don't you want to cuddle me?
*WHAMWHAMWHAMWHAMWHAMWHAMWHAMWHAMWHAMWHA M!*

Bunny: :censored: DIE ALREADY!
Charles Phipps

01-19-07, 06:20 PM		Clone Kitten, much like Ninja Jaela, is basically a Schroedigger's Kitten.

When Kitten and Clone Kitten meet again then they will MERGE and all of their adventures together will be remembered by the single baseline clone entity.

....either that or it'll destroy the universe.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-19-07, 06:51 PM		Ash, before returning to the contest drifts though the ship. As lilly passes he reaches up, hardly looking, ceases him by the throat.

Ash "So you and the laidy Elina are becoming close? just nod"

Lilly "Hgssss" *chokes and nods*

Ash "Then I want you to understand something with perfect claraty. Do I have your full attention? Just nod."

Lilly is going blue, he nods.

Ash " If you take advantage of her, you're going to burn in a very special level of hell. A level they reserve for child molesters and people who talk at the theater." drops Lilly, and with deliberate meaning becomes engulfed in a corona of flames before he teleports.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-19-07, 06:52 PM		EDIT: Dang, Eled's joke was really close to the point of this post. Not enough to change this one, mind you, but still at least a partial case of "future psychic". And bravo on the "people who talk in theaters" level of hell. :D

IC:

Lilly was honestly surprised at Elina's newfound friendliness. Not that he minded. He just wished she could talk again. He had tried to get her to write her thoughts down, but she seemed to have trouble with that, too. What actually ended up as proper Common (or any other language) was usually jibberish. Never the less, she seemed more at ease with him around, so he had no qualms in indulging her.

This, however, was a bit much.

Lilly: Oh boy...I really hope Auntie Terra doesn't take this the wrong way...

He had dropped Elina off in her room last night, then returned to his own. Yet, when he awoke, he found a second occupant in his bed. Apparently Elina had wandered into his room, whether sleepwalking or intentionally he did not know, and cuddled up next to him. She was still asleep, and Lilly was perfectly fine to leave it that way. Of course, the death grip she had on his arm didn't leave him much choice.

Elina: *yawn* ... :confused:

Lilly: Uh...morning?

Elina: :blink: :eek: *slight panic*

Lilly: Ok, I guess that means sleepwalking.

Elina: :confused:

Lilly: I woke up and here you were. Not that I mind. :D

Elina: :embarrass

Ivy: What are you doing, brother?!

Lilly: Oh, hi, Ivy. We were just-

Ivy: Taking advantage of her in such a vulnerable state? How are you still a Paladin?!

Lilly: :confused: But...I'm not...I didn't... It's not what you think!

Ivy: Scoundrel! Cur! I bet you were :censored: ing her in the :censored: , weren't you?! Does your purience know no bounds?!

Lilly: I didn't do anyth-!

*WHAM*

Ivy: *on the ground* Ow.

Elina: *anime style big eyes/embarrased/upset look*

Lilly: Now, now. Don't get so upset. Let's get you some breakfast.

Elina: :embarrass

Lilly: :confused: *looks down* ...oh, right. Pants first, then food.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-19-07, 07:03 PM		(OOC: Welcome back Darakhoranon, er, I kina hijacked Aurixirthos to join Ash and the more Pyromanic crew in the 5nations Conflageration Cup, a competitave pyrotechic desplay with a substantual cash prise. If you want more details on whats planned PM me and I'll fill you in, hopefuly he wont drop out.)
rampant

01-19-07, 07:15 PM		Rashour - ...

Tirmek - No pithy comments?

Rashour - ...

Tirmek - :rolleyes: I'm so serious i must be cool.

Rashour - :twitch:
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-19-07, 07:52 PM		EDIT: Dang, Eled's joke was really close to the point of this post. Not enough to change this one, mind you, but still at least a partial case of "future psychic". And bravo on the "people who talk in theaters" level of hell. :D


(ooc: thanks, but I cant realy take credit, its a word for word quote from Firefly, I got the Boxed set at Christmas and have been quoting it to death )
cypher_zero

01-19-07, 08:30 PM		Rashour: Alright catboy. It's on now. I figure we got at couple of weeks before the next big crisis engulfs the ship so I'm going to spend it handing you your @ss. I got a nice little spot all set up too... *bluff* Hey! What's that!

Tirmek: *fails sense motive* Wha-huh?

Rashour grabs Tirmek and hurls him over the side of the ship.

Rashour: It's on now furrball!!
.
Charles Phipps

01-19-07, 09:14 PM		OOC: Special thanks to Drawn Together.

Doog Junior: *sniffle* Doog Junior not get into Morgraive university again.

Elina: Boo?

Doog Junior: Doog just not smart enough it seems.

Lilly: This is obviously because of prejudice against him as an orc!

Elina: Bwaaa?

Lilly: A conspiracy that reaches to the highest levels of Academia.

Tirmek: And not that Doog is dumb as a post?

*Lilly puts on a pair of horn rimmed glasses and a graduate's cap*

Lilly: Being the genius that I am, I have deduced Morgraive University has combined two time honored Khovaire methods of achieving wealth. Selling stupid stuff to suckers and exploiting the black Orc! I shall demonstrate my theory with a musical montage.

Tirmek: GAH!

*School House Rock music plays*

*Lilly picks up a board*

Lilly: This is the Board of Educaaaaation! It's here to serve the interests of our NATIOONNN! But keeping kids learning doesn't fetch much of an earning! So to make some decent money something had to be doneeee!

*turns to Doog Junior*

Lilly: Doog Junior, do you horde piles of coins in chests in small 10x10 rooms for no apparent reason?

*Doog Junior nods vigorously*

Elina: Gasp!

Tirmek: All orcs do that!

Lilly: Now they make countless millions of the worthless waste the black orcs hide! From their very first gold tusk to their pimped out hides!

*A Gold toothed orc covered in +5 armor passes by*

Lilly: Healing potions and magic rings. No adventurer would find those things unless there was a way to keep those hench orcs dumb!

*Lilly points out the typical Dungeon Crawl on a chart with a pointer, especially noting the ungawdly amounts money the Orcs are spending on nothing*

Lilly: So they keep them out of college, it's what needs to be done!

*Puts a dunce's hat on Doog Junior*

Doog Junior: :sniffle:

*Lilly leads the group through a nearby door to the Adventurer's Guilds that are filled with hugely rich mercenaries, wizards, thieves, and priests*

Lilly: So you see they we can't let Orcs pass their SATS; no educated person would spent their wealth on scrolls they can't use, magic arms, and expanding underground ruins with 5000 gold piece flip floor pit traps.

Tirmek: You racist paladin! No one would ever fall for anything that stupid.

Lilly: Oh you poor naive fool! Even now they're printing a module that's so filled with Orcs that when it's cleaned out, no orc will be alive to ever pass their SATS again!

Sarah: THOSE FIENDS!

OOC: The inspiration http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g6eXAN0Og9o

Warning, typical Drawn Together offensiveness.
rampant

01-19-07, 10:04 PM		Rashour - too eas-ahg!

The floor beneath Rashour has erupted into a geyser of splinters and hammer blows.

Tirmek - haah *throw dagger with lightning charge*

Rashour - *dodge* Missed me -ahg!

The electric charge leaps from the dagger and is conducted by rashour's livingmithral all over his body.

Tirmek - Raaaawwwrrrll *charge*
Endless_Helix

01-19-07, 10:08 PM		OOC: I'm sorry if this steps on anyone's toes plot-wise. From what I've read of this thread, I don't think I'm hijacking any characters, but just in case, here's an apology in advance. Now suck it up!

On a lighter note, I just added the complete Journal of Ishmael to the Other Material section of the Wiki (http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freeesom:Journal_of_a_Redshirt )!
---

The sun was setting, and the cold winds assailed Ishmael Jr. He was probably the longest lasting redshirt in the history of the ship. He'd lost a lot of friends. "Codename G" Died a horrible death at the hands of Crystal, Kanatash's insane ex. Gerald had been used as something unspeakable in Andrea's experiments. His father. Hell, it was practically a cosmic joke. He'd survived every single one of his friends, but each time one of them died, he lost a little piece of himself. It had turned him into very cynical, hard-bitten young man. Even some of the Scum were wary around him nowadays. Ishmael Jr. had just survived so ******* much.

One of the things his father had left him was a journal detailing what happened during the poor man's brief career on this ship. It was sick and wrong what happened to Ishmael Sr. In all honesty is was worse than most of what Ishmael Jr. had ever dealt with, but that wasn't what drove him right now. Ever since Codename G's interview he had begun to rethink his goals; the thing he missed most was having a dad, even if it was a pathetic shmuck who wanted to play sailor. Ishmael Jr. had recently recieved a letter from his mother, who'd thought he'd died a long time ago, but had recently tracked down the fact that he was still alive on the Forgotten Freedom. He couldn't afford the fees to mail something back, but it made him happy that someone cared if he lived or died... Unlike 99% of the crew. But they were all dog's todgers.

It was time that he think about what to do with his life. Like he said before, it was his father that he missed the most. Escaping wasn't worth anything to him; strangely, he couldn't even imagine living anywhere but the Forgotten Freedom. He'd pretty much grown up here. He really wasn't all that old when he first arrived on this desolate place... He was barely shaving...

So, "bring back daddy" would be what drove him, as it did when he first joined this hellhole. Ishmael Jr. liked the full-circle feeling that this new driving motive brought to him. It was better than the whole "surviving, screwing, and killing" that permeated the redshirt class.

Who could help him? Pretty much any of the Ubers, as his father had so blithely grouped them. Who would help him? None of the Ubers would consider his request. He was less than the dirt beneath their feet, in their eyes. Hellfire and damnation, where were the Good Guys?

Thinking on that, Ishmael Jr. decided that two people would consider helping him, Lisa Hopeforge, and possibly Saint Michael. Neither could help him directly, however. Lisa probably could convince the Keeper of the Flame to cast a true resurrection on his father. Assuming his soul was still around, in some form or another. Saint Michael probably couldn't help him.

So to Lisa Hopeforge it is.
rampant

01-19-07, 11:10 PM		Rashour rises to the sky, and stares down at Tirmek, challenging the young incarnate to follow.

Tirmek refuses to be baited. Instead he prepares his mental defenses.

Rashour, realizing his error, retaliates by hurling a pair of axes.

Tirmek's first barrier temporarily suppresses their magical properties. The first bounces off his tough hide, leaving little more than a scratch. The second is caught, its magical power flaring back to life in Tirmek's hands.
luna18moon

01-20-07, 12:18 AM		Salea and Shamil gathered themselves after the explosive failure of their latest experiment. Shamil sighed and absentmindedly began work on another construct.
Salea: Are we ever really going to be able to give life to constructs?
Shamil: If you don't make some alterations to that formula, we'll be guarenteed to fail! Figure out what went wrong or something!
Elsewhere:
Rip: Hmm, a fascinating theory, but their getting the algorythm all wrong.
Tear: We'll give them a little nudge, shall we?
Back with Shamil, Salea twitches and writes a single formula.
Salea: What the... wait, THAT'S IT!
Shamil: Huh?
Salea If you replace this formula with this formula and alter everything else accordingly...
Shamil: Quick, develop the spell while I put the finishing touches on this cat!
A construct of an elegant black cat stands in front of her. She adds a few more lenses to the eyes and gives a :thumbsup: to Salea. Salea mutters a few words and touches its forehead...
A completely normal cat stands before them. Shred walks by and it zooms to a hiding place.
Shamil: Seems to be a completely normal, albeit shy, cat.
Both: *high-five* Success at last!

Brea
Pretty much a normal black cat. She is extremely shy, especially around Shred.
rampant

01-20-07, 04:26 AM		Rashour extends his chains trying to regain the advantage, and his axes.

Tirmek brings down both Incarnate hammer and Rashours own axe against 2 of the chains, the third and fourth slip through regaining both axes.

Tirmek takes ahold of the exposed chains and slams the surprised Rashour into the deck.

Rashour tosses a fireball, only to see it grasped mid-explosion and channeled into Tirmek's next blow. A blazing slice with his right claw that forces Rashour to parry with an amored fist and return to the air.

Rashour - (i.h.h. this one is full of tricks, he's not even trying to engage in melee, just keeps turning my attacks against me)

Tirmek - (i.h.h. thats right, you RPG villian reject, show me more of your much vaunted power, show me you mithral, show me how its done)
ratslinky

01-20-07, 07:26 AM		*When the fight started Gaz activated his rings of fly and invisibility then teleported up to Rashours height. when Rashour got back to the sky Gaz had already come up behind him*

Gaz: *in girl form* Sneak attack :censored:

Tirmek: What did you do that for?

Gaz: Cause I think he's a arrogant snob and you didn't have dibs on him

OORatslinky: rampant and Cypher if you don't like this version of events then this can be non-canon
cypher_zero

01-20-07, 12:57 PM		OOC: Actually, we've already scripted out the fight. Please don't interfere.
rampant

01-20-07, 01:15 PM		OOC: Beguilers don't even have sneak attack.
------------------------------------------------------

Rashour tosses the offending mage away, and gets clonked upside the head.

Tirmek - Many eyes, still one focus.

Rashour - Grrrrrrr

Tirmek proceeds with a volley of flame missles. Smoke and debris fill the air.
cypher_zero

01-20-07, 02:11 PM		Rashour opens up with the full force of his attacks, sweeping low to slash with his chains while hurling axes at Tirmek.

Tirmek dodges the axes, but barely and still takes two of the chains in full force. The second two lash down. Tirmek steals himself and grabs them, then uses his superior leverage to slam Rashour into the ground.

Rashour gets up and bull rushes headlong into Tirmek. At the last moment before contact, he flips up over Tirmek's head and grabs his feet with the chains. Landing behind him, Rashour uses the chains to rip Tirmek off his feet an hurl him into the air. Sending a volley of axes and a fireball streaming at him. Unable to dodge, Tirmek is forced to take the full blunt of the attack.

Rashour: (i.h.h.) I love haste :D
.
rampant

01-20-07, 03:20 PM		Tirmek - *ear twitch* (i.h.h. haste eh?:evillaugh)

Tirmek lands on his feat and assumes a fighting stance.

Rashour notices a slight twitch in Tirmek's right side, and waits for the right moment.

Rashour - (i.h.h. no matter how tough his hide he can't keep taking hits like this, there he's blinking!)

Rashour dashes in with all his speed, using his speed to catch the younger fighter off-gaurd. A faint shimmer appears as Tirmek tries desperately to raise a defense.

Rashour - (i.h.h. too little too la-) Gahkrle

A pile driver blow to the gut has stopped the charging warrior.

As Rashour fights to regain his feet. He sees for an instant the shape of a feral wolf-like humanoid 7 feet tall forged of transparent psi-carnum. THe construct fades as the damage from the clash dispells it.

Rashour - (i.h.h. how did he fool my truesight)

Tirmek - (i.h.h. truesight, wont help against something that is made transparent to light at most angles, at least not until its too late, I wonder if he realizes just how much I could have messed him up right there)

Rashour reaches out once more with his hasted chains, and finally manages to snag the smaller fighter. Rashour responds with arcing lightning using the metal to once more hammer on Rashour body. Despite the voltage rashour clings on still unable to move most of his body he chokes Tirmek with the chains.

Tirmek tries a different tactic, infusing his hand with frost he chills a section of chain, then repeats only with flame.

Rashour howls as the deadly weave of psychic manipulations mangles one of his chains. With one last surge he slams Tirmek into the mast finally putting the young incarnate under.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-20-07, 03:53 PM		Jarlot: *completely hammered* STOP BLOWIN' 'OLES IN MY SHIP!

Aerith: The Forgotten Freedom practically heals itself, dear.

Jarlot: We have enough trouble from all the crazy idiots who want to kill us that ARENT part of the crew!

Aerith: Now, now. Would :censored: and :censored: ing me in the :censored: while I :censored: , :censored: and :censored: you help? You could :censored: :censored: :censored: me if you like.

Jarlot: :blink:

Aerith: Chaotic Good, hon. ;)

Jarlot: Do you want the mustache on or off?

Aerith: Off.

Jarlot: ...too bad.
rampant

01-20-07, 04:32 PM		Dorvos - :nonono:

Teiza - What were you thinking?! NEVER CHARGE A SMARTER OPPONENT!!

Rashour - like the smashed guts weren't punishment enough

Teiza - Never fight Tirmek! He's dangerous if you don't know what you're doing!

Rashour - I won.

Dorvos - Hmmmmmm!:rolleyes:

Rashour - :confused:

Teiza - Right brother, Tirmek got up in a minute, your'e still on your back Rashour. Big deal what the score is if he cuts your throat when you're down!

Rashour - *cough*you act like he was going to kill me

Teiza - As uppity as you got, I'm surprised he didn't.
ratslinky

01-20-07, 05:18 PM		OORatslinky: I know beguilers can't sneak attack but ninjas can. Sorry for barging in like that.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-20-07, 06:21 PM		OORatslinky: I know beguilers can't sneak attack but ninjas can. Sorry for barging in like that.
OOcat: This is the FF: anyone can sneak attack without meaning to.

Some sort of assasins are climbing over the side of the FF. Suddenly a psicarnum and metal chains blast through the section of the ship they are clinging to, making them animé crispy.

Roosevelt: Would you two one-tracks fight somewhere else?! It's bad enough that I have to deal with Pholly all day without you two bozos adding to the damage!
DungeonJman

01-20-07, 07:09 PM		OOC: You guys mind if i sidetrack Rashour and Tirmek for a bit, considering that the fight's over?
rampant

01-20-07, 09:45 PM		Sarah - I'm worried, Elina's so scrambled that she can't use her powers.

Tirmek - She's still in shock, until she deals with the trauma, one way or another, she's screwed. Now The island won't penalize her right away, but if she can't keep up in class they will just drop her from the classes for the term, then let her apply again next term. Still I think it best if she were to get through this quickly. The longer you hold onto something the harder it is to let go,... sometimes especially when its hurting you.

Sarah - What do we do?

Tirmek - Well I'm going to go rag on her for not inviting me to the party. I'm sick of chasing after her and not getting to smack anything.
urial angel of death

01-20-07, 11:38 PM		OOC: Gram'mar forgive me. I have no spellcheck currently.

IC: Satnak and Izzy are sitting across from each in a fancy dining car. The car an the tunnel it is driving through are both entirely transparent. Outside of the tunnel is a world entirely alien to Satnak. Hundreds of beautiful mutli-colored fish swam by. It was the Atlantic Ocean's floor.

Satnak: Whoa!

Dorvos: :mymy: Goooooooooo.

Izzy: :D I knew you had never been on one of these.

Satnak: Are they all like this?

Izzy: Yep, though there is a little variation from ocean to ocean.

Satnak: Amazing!

Izzy: Now to get back on task. Satnak you have powers both from you lineage and you position as a former Flusher.

Satnak: Flusher ;)

Izzy: The gods aren't very good at naming. It means you were chosen to get rid of the people who don't deserve to live. Flushing them out of the mortal realm. You were give powers of the soul. What this allows you to do I'm not sure yet. But whatever these powers are, I can assure you that they are incredibly powerful. The powers granted by your family on the other hand are known to me. You have millions of tiny little crystal in your body and you can control their movement, growth, and make-up.

Satnak: How will I know how to use them on this "quest"?

Izzy: They'll manifest when they are needed.

Satnak: When?

Izzy: Oh, an opertunity will present itself.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-21-07, 12:55 AM		OOC: Gram'mar forgive me. I have no spellcheck currently.
OOC: As if you ever used it before. :D :P

IC:

Nina: Please?

Terra: No.

Caralot: Come on, just once? She asked nicely.

Terra: I know, but we swore never to let those...things see the light of day ever again.

Caralot: They weren't that bad.

Nina: *ADORABLE LITTLE GIRL ATTACK* Pweeeese? :bigeyes:

Terra: No...must...resist...

Nina: :bigeyes: :weep:

Terra: :gah: *sigh* Ok, you win.

Terra and Caralot each hold up one half of a crystal. Placing them together, a portal is revealed. Out of it flies an ordinary looking owl.

Nina: :D It's so cute! But what's so bad about it that you had to lock it up?

Owl 1: O'RLY (http://bani.anime.net/o_rly.jpg)?

Terra: Here we go...

Several more owls poke their heads out.

Owl 2: YA RLY (http://cornontherobb.wordpress.com/files/2006/05/yarly7hp.gif).

Owl 3: NO WAI (http://media.urbandictionary.com/image/large/nowai-42443.jpg)!

Owl 4: SRSLY (http://media.urbandictionary.com/image/large/srsly-40514.jpg)?

Owl 5: YA SRSLY (http://media.urbandictionary.com/image/large/srsly-40515.jpg).

Owl 6: LOL (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/angrycrustacean/lol.jpg)!

Nina: :twitch:

Terra: See why we locked them up?

Nina: *Caralot style* SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! *runs to hug them*

Owl 5: OMG!

Owl 3: WTF?!

Owl 6: PWNED!

OOC: No good pics for the last three came up on google. :(
rampant

01-21-07, 01:05 AM		Satnak - (i.h.h. this flusher crap is complete bokum, the crystals however...mother was always fascinated by the things, the family sword, its the only piece in that whole little hoarde I could never sell off, I'm beginning to think that letting Dorvos learn how to use it was a good idea)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Elina - *anime angry pom*

Tirmek - Furthermore it was incredibly rude to go off on an adventure, and not invite me! I mean for crying out loud, don't you trust me? Really Elina, think that you would have learned by now, Sarah and I, we're here to help.

Elina - :headexplo: (i.h.h. overbearing know-it-all) *lunges at Tirmek*

Tirmek - Aahh -cough- progress -hack-
urial angel of death

01-21-07, 01:34 AM		Izzy: You have a sword to complement those powers! Excellent!

Satnak: How did you know what I was thinking?

Izzy: I have power over void. One such void being the one which psionic waves are transmited across. Lacking in any real psions here I can hear the thoughts of those near me. Now do you have it with you?
rampant

01-21-07, 01:45 AM		Satnak - (i.h.h. ...)

Izzy - What are you doing?

Satnak - (i.h.h. ...)

Izzy - No seriously stop tha-aaaaaahhhh!

Satnak - Stay out of my head.

Izzy - (i.h.h. oh gods those eyes! the boss warned me about her, even with what little she knows, her power is awakening already... her family must have never forgotten completely)

Dorvos - Hmmmmmmm:fight!:

Izzy - -gasp- so he has the sword
Kaizer_Ryu

01-21-07, 02:19 AM		OOC: Probably should have just stated it, but I kind of need Elina to not have any coherent words said at all, even in her head. Writing...maybe. A few words, but not complete sentences. It's for later, not just 'cause I said so.

It was still funny, though. :D

Until I remember why she's angry at him. :( And it's not because he's being rude. Well...not entirely at least.

How long she stays like this is almost entirely dependent on the actions of those around her. Her own mind is so :gel: right now, she can barely function, much less return to normal. I already know how she's going to, it's just a matter of how she gets to the emotional/mental state required.

Tirmek did help advance that, just so you know.
rampant

01-21-07, 02:53 AM		Tirmek - *gag* Now all *ghack* we have to *gurgle* do is get you *wheeze* to deal with the emotions you're locking *cough* away. I think you *huuuuuussss* will find that its *rrllrrrlllll* not as bad as you think.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-21-07, 03:47 AM		Lilly walks through the adjoining hall.

Elina taverses 40 feet in .05 seconds.

Elina: :D *latches onto his arm*

Lilly: :eek: GAH! ...oh. Ok, then.

Tirmek: *as they walk away* Ok, that's what's confusing me. Why's she suddenly so friendly to Spoony jr? Didn't she hate him passionately not to long ago?

Sarah: Don't look at me, I don't know.

Tirmek: He was the one who freed her from that circle and the one who ended the ritual. Maybe that has something to do with it?

Sarah: Some kind of hero worship? Isn't she a little old for that?

Tirmek: She's in shock. Any number of things may have happened. According to Miko, the Shadow was what was driving her to such depths of hate.

Sarah: Was?

Tirmek: That's part of what I think is happening here. According to Aunt Satnak, this whole thing was orchestrated by the Shadow. Elina probably knows this. If he was really as deep in her trust as Miko suggests, his betraying her to such a degree could be what's causing this. It may also explain Lilly if the Shadow was indeed driving her away from him.

Sarah: Then she's seen through his poisoned words and will stop being so intense and creepy once she turns back to normal?

Tirmek: Or it's just because he saved her and her fractured mind latched onto her hero of the moment. Which is probably more likely.

Sarah: :mad: Damn Occam's Razor to Fernia! Is there a school of thought that suggests that the good solution is right, not the simplest?

Tirmek: I'm just concerned about the fact that you two and he are cousins, yet their relationship doesn't seem to bother any of you. I mean, I'm not one to talk considering what the Rakshasa half of my relatives do, but...

Sarah: Oh, that. Turns out it's a widespread custom in Breland. It's on the books in nearly every nation on Khorvaire from the Galifar days, but it's especially embraced in Brelish culture.

OOC: The first to get the real life example I'm using on the last bit gets a :yuck: trophy.

Charles isn't eligible since we already discussed this parallel. ;)
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-21-07, 07:54 AM		Tirmek: I'm just concerned about the fact that you two and he are cousins, yet their relationship doesn't seem to bother any of you. I mean, I'm not one to talk considering what the Rakshasa half of my relatives do, but...
Silver: What, why are you all looking at me like that? Who ever said I had that limitation? :P (pulls out a banjo)

Bunny: Soooooooooooooooo much easier just to kill things. :bored:
rampant

01-21-07, 01:10 PM		Kithle - Smurf souffle!
Charles Phipps

01-21-07, 02:55 PM		Rose: Well, you see Tirmek, our pure Elf Genes make the problem of inbreeding moot.

Tirmek: Elf genes?

Rose: Yes, Elf Genes. Elves are so inherently superior that such paltry concerns as insufficient genetic drift is never a problem for us. Take Zella's sister Peach for instance.

Peach: I tied my shoelaces!

Rose: Perfectly normal for an elf her age.

Tirmek: How old is she?

Rose: Eighty...
DungeonJman

01-21-07, 03:17 PM		OOC: Since no one has opposed me sidetracking TIrmek or Rashour, i'm going along with it. Otherwise, please send a PM.

*walks onto the deck with his eyes closed and whistling when he sees Rashour who just got beaten up*

What the ?? What happened? No wait, i'll look for myself *looks at the previous posts*

WHAT?!?!? Why did this... no, i don't even need to go back several posts to find out why this happened.

*snaps his fingers and Tirmek is teleported there*

Tirmek: What are you doing.

DungeonJ: Oh, you didn't think that i saw the fight before? Both of you need to learn a thing or two about the arrogance that comes from power.

Tirmek: Both of us?

DungeonJ: You could have found another way to resolve this, but you chose the easiest way where you knew you could beat him, and you knew it the whole time. Anyway, since just giving a lecture won't help, especially since you guys will either ignore it, or not take the lesson to heart, i've decided to send you to a place that can teach you the message.

Both: What?!?!

DungeonJ: But first i have to see if you learned something. If power corrupts and corruption leads to evil, where will i be sending you. If you understand, then you won't have to go.

Rashour: Mabar, to see what corruption is like?

Tirmek: A place where we have no power?

DungeonJ: *smacks his head* You obviously know nothing about this, if you can find out the name of the place where i will send you, then you will understand the lesson, and you can return.

*knocks them both into a portal which appears out of nowhere before disappearing*

Sarah: :hoppingma: What did you just do ?

DungeonJ: Don't worry, they won't be harmed, it's the nature of the place where i sent them to, that that won't happen. This is a journey of self improvement that can only be undertaken by those who are lacking. Besides, if they're as smart as they say, it shouldn't take them too long to find out.
_______________________

*Both Tirmek and Rashour land in a place that appears to look and feel like a paradise of good, with a small amount of evil mixed in, as they try to sooth their aching heads (hint: it's not from the landing) they see an incorporeal woman sitting at a seemingly randomly placed desk*

Woman: May i help you?
_______________________
Note: No one can actually tell them where they are, since it is the mission of the people there to find out the same things as they want to know, and if they learn it, then they leave.
Lord Kale Fangblade

01-21-07, 03:22 PM		Sithis gazed at the sky, its strange... being out in day light. even being mostly living it was a bit like a slight itch. perhaps it was the hunger. the hunger that screamed out for him to feed.
He couldnt feed, it was too dangerous. besides, feeding on people without their concent... it was like rape. it was abhorrant. it was the taboo that had been hammered into every vampire, Half-blood and Daereni since birth.
Blood must be given freely, life force must be given freely.
thats what seperated them from the beasts they once where, had not the elves lived with the deathless for millenia?

Sithis scowled. it wasnt like people here lined up to freely give their blood, here the undead where feared. and when he thought about it the Deathless where also widely feared. but what powered them? Positive energy definetly, but where did they gain this? how did they siphon it?
He would have to study this dilema in detail, Postive and Negative, apposed often but together.... the possibilties where endless.

Sithis noted Elina and Lilly passing, They had grown close recently.
this was troubling, He had never liked the Paladin. Paladins had long been the enemy of the Undead, of Necromancy. it was in his blood to fear them, he didnt fear Lilly. his precence merely made him uncomfortable.
Sithis's hand unconciously went to the Unholy symbol about his neck,
It was the Darkstar, the Hexogram, the symbol of the DarkSix. imposed in the centre was a stylised drop of blood.

In Sithis's world these belonged to a sect that had flourished in Karranth which once the Empire had taken over had allowed for the Blood of Vol and Dark Six worshipers to come out of hideing.
The sect had decided to combine the worship, similar to the Keepers of the blood in this world. Combining the Power of the self and the power of the Dark Six.

Mentioning the Panethon brought up Memories of Yaun and the horrors that creature had wrough. no wonder he'd felt wrong. Sithis had tracked him for such a long time, only to have Lilly slay him. Sithis scowled slightly, petty jealousy had to be put aside. it served no purpose. it only divided attention.

Sithis's hand returned to the staff by his side. He'd only got to test it once, and he could feel the Elementals within yearning to unleash their power. he hushed them with a slight glimmer of will. he would have to test the Staff more, its effect had been stronger than he'd anticipated. especialy for a low setting.

Sithis rose from his leaning position, his black gloved hand clenching on his staff. Sithis strode down the stairs to the Portal room for the Black Citadel, he would have to do more research on the item he'd heard about. hopefully it would prove beneficial to his research.
rampant

01-21-07, 03:23 PM		OOC: Rashour won the fight, Tirmek just lost in a way so that he was up and about in a few minutes while rashour was having his gall bladder removed fromhis spleen.
DungeonJman

01-21-07, 03:27 PM		Exactly, but he knew the whole time that Rashour would do something like that, thus if he wanted to he could, in the end, "win", regardless of appearing to lose.
urial angel of death

01-21-07, 03:27 PM		OOC: The first to get the real life example I'm using on the last bit gets a :yuck: trophy.

Charles isn't eligible since we already discussed this parallel. ;)

Well there are a large number of places it could refer. These include the Incans, Persians, Appilationmountain hicks, or the European royal families up until World War 1.
urial angel of death

01-21-07, 03:32 PM		Izzy: Please stop glaring at me. I'm not in your head. I'm just listening to the thoughts you subconsiously project. I can't help hearing it. I always hear people's surface thoughts, unless there is a psion around, who quickly eclipses all of them.
rampant

01-21-07, 03:40 PM		Corre - Hey Tear, look a dueling club.
------------------------------------------

Tirmek - (i.h.h. Never hurts to just ask.) Hello, I was wondering if there is any information about this place you could give us?
DungeonJman

01-21-07, 03:59 PM		The woman replies:

Well, considering that most people that come here are a lot different than you, i'd probably say that in addition to not being on your home world or plane, you're not even in your home dimension. Secondly, i believe that the ruler of this layer lives in the only castle here somewhere, but it's relatively hard to find it, i sure haven't. Third of all, you'll occasionally get some evil ramblings or suggestions in the back of your head, it's best to ignore those. Finally, i'd say you're the first live people to come to this plane, but not this layer in 2800 years or so, i could be off, although that isn't really about this place, it may help you. I don't really know any more.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-21-07, 04:03 PM		Well there are a large number of places it could refer. These include the Incans, Persians, Appilationmountain hicks, or the European royal families up until World War 1.
Ok, one more hint.

Breland is a Constitutional Monarchy, despite what King Steve says.

The last one was really close.

Yes, I know that was two hints.
Charles Phipps

01-21-07, 04:06 PM		[edited]
urial angel of death

01-21-07, 04:07 PM		OOC: Breland refers to England and the rest of Khorvaire is Europe. Every noble was a cousin of every other noble and very rarely was that ffarther than second cousin. And of course nobles could only marry other nobles or they would be shunned.
urial angel of death

01-21-07, 04:09 PM		[edited]

Ooo mysterious. It must have been the LGMs. Run for your lives!
Kaizer_Ryu

01-21-07, 04:31 PM		OOC: Urial gets the :yuck: award.

Charles gets the :elf: award for properly demonstrating Elven arrogance, whether justified or not.

:D

And the [Edited] has me intrigued as well.
Endless_Helix

01-21-07, 05:01 PM		OOC: Apologies if I hijack any characters (specifically Terra)... It's for the greater good. I swear.
--------------------------------------------------------------------

SFXDEMON: Knock, knock... Tira's blade, Helix, can't you come up with some more creative SFX? I mean, geez...

Ishmael Jr. looks puzzled for a second.

Ishmael Jr.: Huh. That's new.

Lisa: Uh... Hello! Um... Who are you?

Lisa looks Ishmael Jr. up and down, and notices the shirt. The red shirt with the target on it. The bright red shirt with the target on it.

Lisa: *brightly* Oh, did you come for the trash? I've got it all bagged up this time!

Ishmael Jr. Not quite, ma'am. I... uh... Oh hellfire, I'll take the trash. Kessen wil owe me a favor then. But I've got to... ask you something.

Lisa: Okay? Well, spit it out, boy!

Ishmael Jr. Yes'm! It's kind of long, and I'd rather not talk about it in the open. You don't know who's listening. I'm pretty sure I do though, Ma'am.

Lisa: You do?

Ishamel Jr.: Yep. Kanatash has a permanent link on me, because I'm the longest lasting redshirt, ever. Most die within two weeks of their hiring, and he's slightly disappointed that his brand of insanity hasn't driven me into non-euclydian madness yet. Volrath likes to know what's going with Terra, and has a couple of spells just outside on the doorstep. Ketler has a spell right outside your bedroom window, for obvious reasons. There's more, but those are the ones I'd rather not have know about this. Erk's place can block most of the scrying I'm worried about, ma'am.

Lisa: Uh... (Note to self: Tell Terra about Ketler's little rig...) Alright. So you're going to take the trash down to where ever it goes and then come back?

Ishmael Jr.: Certainly ma'm. *Get's down on his knees* Thank you so much, ma'am.

Lisa: Sure thing. :embarrass
---

Ishmael Jr.: Off you go!

The trash bags get heaved over the side of the ship and down onto a small Thranish farmhouse. The area is almost instantly turned into a massive forest, full of slightly animate plants that feast upon the innocent.

Ishmael Jar.: Huh. Terra's trash makes good fertilizer.
---

Lisa is reading a book on the lives of several noted Sulatar Paladins. It would be a dull and boring book to anyone else, because above all, these particular pallies were only part of a single heroic endeavor, and then retired to farm or mine or some such idiocy.

Terra: Hey babe.

Lisa: Terra! Oh, wow!

Terra is wearing a slinky little number, freshly imported from Aundair.

Terra: Don't worry, I boought you one too. :D

Lisa: Awww... *Hugs Terra* Hey, if a redshirt comes by asking for me while I try the new dress on, invite him in. I think he's got a legitimate problem. He seemed troubled, anyway...

Terra: Lisa, odds are he's already dead. And besides, you shouldn't let people take advantage of you... he probably is just new and wants to shack up with you or something.

Lisa: I know, but I have to give him a chance. :)

Terra: :D Alright. I'll let him in... if he shows up.
---
At this moment Ishmael is trying to beat a giant treant off the side of the ship. We will return you your regularly scheduled broadcast shortly.
---

Ishmael Jr. Finally... *watches the treant land back in the ever growing forest that spawned it* Now to see if I can get my dream realized, Dad.

Ishmael Jr. walks back to Terra and Lisa's cabin. He is suprisingly left alone the entire way.

SFXDEMON: What is truth? This random philosophical question brought to you in place of a SFX.

Ishmael Jr.: :confused:

Terra: Yes? Are you here for Terra?

Ishmael Jr.: Yes'm. I need to ask her a favor, ma'am.

Terra: And what is that favor?

Ishmael Jr. It's... Personal, ma'am.

Terra: A personal favor, eh? Well, whatever. Come on in.

Ishmael Jr.: Uh... Thank you, ma'am?

Terra: Whatver, Lisa asked me to let you in. And stop with the 'ma'am' crap. It's Terra.

Ishmael Jr.: Yes'm. I know that ma'am. But I'm a redshirt. I'm well aware of my mortality, ma'am.

Terra: You didn't stop calling me 'ma'am' and you didn't step inside... Do you have a death wish?

Ishmael Jr.::eek: No. *Walks inside*
urial angel of death

01-21-07, 05:09 PM		Gregory walks over to Lilly

Gregory: I would just like to say I am very proud of you.

Lilly: Huh?

Gregory: You and I both know full well what you would have done if Elina had been this affectionate when you first arrived. You've really grown.

Lilly: :embarrass Thanks I guess. But why tell me this know.

Gregory: I don't know. I just feel like I'll never see anyone from this ship again. :weep:

Lilly: That's just because you're going on an ominous journey and your Entity is humming the Jaws theme.

OOUrial: :shifty:

OOC: Behold the glory of my sig
rampant

01-21-07, 05:18 PM		Tirmek - (i.h.h. lets be less direct) What conflicts stir this land?
DungeonJman

01-21-07, 05:36 PM		OOC: exactly what do you mean by that?
rampant

01-21-07, 05:48 PM		OOC: He figures the woman isn't going to just solve this for him by dropping the name so he's looking to find out if the area is currently in conflict, if so over what?
Kaizer_Ryu

01-21-07, 05:51 PM		OOC: That's pretty close, Endless_Helix. Terra's no longer vindictive to that extent, but otherwise accurate. :thumbsup:
DungeonJman

01-21-07, 05:55 PM		The woman answers:

"No conflict stirs this land, this is just how it is. The only conflict is within the hearts of the souls that come here, who are trying to find the right way."
ratslinky

01-21-07, 06:29 PM		Mareth: *Walking home from a party with Gaz* Thanks Gaz that was a wonderful party

Gaz: My pleasure *they arrive at her home Gaz gives her a kiss goodnight romance blooming blah blah blah*

*Later*

Gaz: That was a crap romantic scene

OORatslinky: Hey I can't help it if I'm bad at romance writing. Now to get Gaz's plan for beating the shadow. By the way I'm assuming that the shadow is hostile

IC:

Gaz: Hey T.F.O can I talk thru you to the Shadow?

T.F.O: Sure what do you want to do?

Gaz: What I'm best at diplomacy

T.F.O: Okay he's on line 1

Shadow: What do you want mortal?

Gaz: Well actually I'm the chosen of T.F.O but I'm here to *Diplomacy check*

Shadow: Gaz my friend how can I help

Gaz: Well *Diplomacy check*

Shadow: All hail Gaz

Gaz: (I.h.h sweet)

Shadow: What would you have me do my lord?

Gaz: Well there are a few things I could think of but Kaizer wouldn't like it so not much right now except don't give Elina such a hard time

Shadow: It will be done
Kaizer_Ryu

01-21-07, 06:58 PM		Shadow: SUCKER! Like I'd take orders from you.

Gaz: I HATE you.

OOKaizer: You brought it on yourself. Now I'm off to hide again before-

Terra: *Darth Vader style* I have you know. :emp:

OOKaizer: :eek: Oh cra-!

*UBERPWNAGE*

OOC: I've got something in mind for the Shadow that will make all this torture worth while. Elina may just barely decide not to murder me in horrible, horrible ways. :D
DungeonJman

01-21-07, 07:03 PM		Hey, you never got away this time, and although i can't take you out for good...

Shadow: Oh...
____________________
OOC: I can't do the next part of the alternate dimension thing til rampant responds.
ratslinky

01-21-07, 07:36 PM		OORatslinky: Hey Gaz converted him to fanatic Shadow would die for him and when Gaz said don't give her such a hard time that doesn't mean he still can't be mean it just means he won't be as mean
rampant

01-21-07, 07:41 PM		Tirmek - Ok fine then I assume you have some sort of system or something, becuase what any of this has to do with arrogance is beyond me.

Rashour - Maybe we should just start breaking things, starting with the receptionist.
ratslinky

01-21-07, 07:58 PM		OORatslinky: Just so your happy The Shadow can't do things against his nature. What I mean by that is he won't become good
cypher_zero

01-21-07, 08:14 PM		OOC: Since no one has opposed me sidetracking TIrmek or Rashour, i'm going along with it. Otherwise, please send a PM.
OOC: I know you're newer to the FF so I'll be polite this time. Don't f- with my characters. That goes for Rashour, Terrek, Serene a few of the lesser used. Don't mess with them. Anything you do that you haven't run by me first is considered not canon. Some of the others have been around long enough that they have a grasp of Serene, and to a lesser extent Terrek, so they can run stuff with them cause they know what's up. You don't yet. Especially not with Rashour. He's new and even Rampant doesn't have a handle on him yet. So no touchy.

That said, Rashour isn't on Mabar or wherever it is you "sent" him. Ask me first.

OODJM: Hey, can I...

OOcypher: No.

OODJM: But...

OOcypher: No.

Also, Rashour wasn't nearly as beat up as was led to believe. When you have near complete control of your own form, it's hard to have your galll bladder removed. Rashour, should by all rights be able to whip Trimek's butt up and down the lower decks... but Tirmek is cunning and Rashour isn't entirely sure what he's capable of. He also doesn't want to hurt him any more than nessessary to prove his point. Tirmek was going for lethal, Rashour was just trying to KO Tirmek. While Tirmek wouldn't intentionally kill rashour, he probably has less qualms about going full blow since he knows Terrek's abilities and hence knows most of Rashour's. Rashour still isn't sure just how much punishment Tirmek can take; but now he knows Tirmek isn't going to fall apart after a few blows so the next time they fight, he'll open up some more.

And... I'll rant some more later. My girlfriend wants to go out into the "real world." Whatever that is.
.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-21-07, 08:42 PM		There is a knock on Rashour's door.

Rashour: Just a minute. (goes to open it)

*door bust!*

Marish: RASHOUR! What were you thinking, fighting like that?

Rashour: Well, I was challenged, and—*glooph*!

Marish squeezes him to her chest in a suffocating animé voluptuous woman style.

Marish: I did not carry you around for X months just so you could throw your life away battling. Do you realize the things they teach at that Island place? Tirmek is Satnak's nephew, you do know who she's killed?

Rashour: (manages to push away for a second) I'm—*glump*!

Marish: I know, I know. *funny masculine voice* "I'm Terrek's child, I can beat anyone up." *normal Marish* Well you're my child too, and I don't think you should be fighting.

Rashour (muffled): This from the woman who hasn't been in my life for how many years?

Marish: :eek: Oh my stats, oh I never realized! I'm a terrible mother. :weep: (holds him out to look him in the eye) Is there any way you can ever forgive me?

Rashour: —*glomph*!

Marish: Shhh, shh, mummy's here now.

Rashour: (ihh I wonder if my brothers have to deal with this?)

OOC: Yeah, I know cypher, don't f*** with your characters. I just wanted to remind people, and have some fun. :D I mean, it is true she's his mother.
cypher_zero

01-21-07, 08:51 PM		Rahsour: (i.h.h.) Crazy b*tch! No wonder dad never bothered keeping her around. What was it he said?

*flashback*

Rashour: Hey dad, how come you never stayed with mom?

Terrek: Cause she's a crazy b*tch.

Rashour: So why did you hook up with her in the first place?

Terrek: Cause the crazy ones are the best in bed.

----
Silver: It's true! :D

Bunny: Why!? Just... Why!?

13: It was my idea. :D

Bunny: *facepalm*
----

Rashour: I did not need to know that.

Terrek: You'll thank me when you're older.
.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-21-07, 09:02 PM		*SOUND OF HORRIBLE BEATINGS*

OOKaizer: AUGH! BUDDA! ZEUS! GOD! ONE OF YOU DO SOMETHING!

*FURTHER SOUNDS OF EXPLOSIONS AND TORMENT THAT WOULD MAKE KANATASH CRY*

OOKaizer: SATAN! YOU OWE ME!

-----

Sarah: *pouts while hugging her Tirmek plushie*

Tellowas: :( (i.h.h.) Even when he's out of the picture, she won't look at anyone else. What's so great about him, anyway?

-----

Lilly: I've got it!

Elina: :confused:

Lilly: The perfect way for you to express your thoughts till you get your speech back!

Elina: :D

Lilly: *hold up a book* The Beginners Guide to Interpretive Dance!

Elina: :uh-huh:

Lilly: It's foolproof. Interpretive Dance is the Universal Language.

Elina: :nonono:
ratslinky

01-21-07, 09:06 PM		OORatslinky: Hey Kaizer I think I can help you for a price :shifty:
DungeonJman

01-21-07, 09:10 PM		Tirmek: Huh, where did Rashour go?

*DungeonJ's voice sounds in his head*

Cypher went crazy about me using him for this. *mumble* i had the stupid notice up, am i supposed to wait 2 days to get an answer for a mini-plot */mumble* so, you'll have to learn this alone.

*voice stops. As Tirmek tries to figure out what to do next, he sees his own shadow start to talk to him*

Shadow-Tirmek: Now, he'll never learn what's best, and you'll have to teach him another lesson when you get back, so he can feel the suffering that you're going to have to go through.

Tirmek: What did you do?

*voice reappears*

Uh, you said you wanted to find out the system here? This is a part of it. The "ramblings in your head", although the best system, isn't really to ignore it, but to do something about it, considering that it's not going to shut up.

Tirmek: And by "doing something about it" you mean?

DungeonJ: Finding out what to do is one third of the lesson.
________________________

OOC: You know the "evil inclination DungeonJ" that's pretty much what this is, but it can't take solid form until a certain condition is met. So just act out what Tirmek's evil side would tell him to do (it would pretty much think like him, but with a much more evil and convincing intent to everything it thinks and says), and how he would react.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-21-07, 10:27 PM		OORatslinky: Hey Kaizer I think I can help you for a price :shifty:
OOKaizer: *pain* No thanks. *wince* I deserve this. :weep:

Terra: :mad: You better believe it.

OOKaizer: *sting* Are you almost done? *cringe*

Terra: Not even close.

Lisa: Save some for the rest of us, hon.

Lisa, Sarah, Elina, Momo, Scias, Nina, and Deis stand behind her holding various instruments of painful retribution.

Terra: Go ahead, love. Don't worry about holding back. He regenerates. He's an Entity after all.

OOKaizer: There are times when I curse my Entity status. :weep:
DungeonJman

01-21-07, 11:33 PM		*hears OOKaizer get beaten up*

That's why

*crash* Ouch that had to hurt

when i do plots

*sawing and gashing sound* Oooh, i didn't even know that Eberron had the equivalent of a chainsaw

I make sure that

*hack and slash* Ouch, i bet that hurts and stings

I don't mess with people's

*AAAAAH* Don't even want to know about that.

heads that much, unless it's for their benefit,

*laser blast* What the ?

and no adverse side effects will come as a result. Such as getting beaten up or advancing the Shadow's schemes. You see?
Paulon

01-22-07, 12:05 AM		They're just out to punish him on a personal level. It could be worse... they could have arranged for Kanatash and Kithle to give a hand.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-22-07, 12:30 AM		They're just out to punish him on a personal level. It could be worse... they could have arranged for Kanatash and Kithle to give a hand.
Kithle: Kanatash knows better than to horn in on my turf. Now go away. I'm trying to figure out how I can swim in all the gold I was so generously offered for my expertise.
rampant

01-22-07, 01:03 AM		Kaizer - NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Terra - :mymy: He is evil!

Lisa - Urge to smite rising.

Kithle - Oh is that a majora's mask cartridge i just stepped on, how careless of me.
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - :eek: No! You are mine you do not get to be free! I am the master of my own darkness! MINE YOU HEAR ME!

Tirmek has latched on to Shadow-Tirmek and is trying to force it to return to its place within him.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-22-07, 07:37 AM		Tirmek has latched on to Shadow-Tirmek and is trying to force it to return to its place within him.
Silver: Huh, and here I thought Tirmek was straight.

Bunny: Is there anything you can't make sound dirty?

Silver: Not found it yet.

OOC: :globe: to the one who can tell me where that comes from.
DungeonJman

01-22-07, 11:10 AM		Well, for all the idiotic "no my evil belongs to me" junk you hear on this ship, i'm not surprised he tried that. Unfortunately, the answer happens to be completely different
_____________________

Shadow-Tirmek: No! I will stay until you figure out why you are here and where here is, and unless you find the answer, i'm staying! And for the record, i'm still a shadow as of this point, you're just randomly beating up the ground.
Lord Kale Fangblade

01-22-07, 11:32 AM		Bunny: Is there anything you can't make sound dirty?

Silver: Not found it yet.



Hmmm, i would have to guess. Mascarade, by Terry pratchett.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-22-07, 02:09 PM		Hmmm, i would have to guess. Mascarade, by Terry pratchett.
OOC: 2nd-best book ever. :globe:
rampant

01-22-07, 06:03 PM		Tirmek - Hell certainly springs to mind.

Tirmek has chosen a light source and set down beneath it in order to seal the shadow beneath him.

Shadow T. - I will be free.
------------------------------------

OOC: WARNING :censored:ing with Tirmek's darkside is asking for the Knightmare Prince. Pride just might be one of his "good" traits.
--------------------------------------------------

Shadow T. - We are a proud and greedy young man, But you, you have used that to deny me. Your prideful dismissal of destiny, your selfish need for freedom, why do you deny yourself your rightful place as lord of the realm.
DungeonJman

01-22-07, 06:22 PM		OOC: Well, it is an alternate earth plane, but it's not hell, in fact you'll find that it's very, very different. I don't plan to mess with his dark side. Just give an alternate way of looking at it, and evil. It is not necessary for Tirmek to actually change at all, but just realize that good and evil are not one coin, but two coins, that are adjacent to each other, each having a positive and negative side.

*looks at the conversation*

oh man, well i guess i'll just have to bring out the examples a little early then, so that he doesn't go psycho by messing with his own mind.

_____________________

*as Tirmek is arguing with his shadow, he sees the woman at the desk has disappeared and 8 people are standing in the plain. The first is standing next to a table, with a small amount of money on it, while another table with a load of money is nearby*

1st person's shadow: Come on, take the gold, there is no one there and no one will mind if you take it. It should be yours, so have at it!

1st person: No, it does not belong to me, and taking it would be wrong!

*the shadow then becomes slightly fainter*

*the 2nd person is looking at the third person and is talking to his shadow*

2nd shadow: That person is better off than you, he stole everything that you had in life, and in death he still torments you. Devise plans against him, so that you may achieve your revenge!

2nd person: Yes, yes!

*the 2nd person's shadow grows more corporeal. The fourth person is lecturing the 5th person, who is talking to his shadow*

5th shadow: This person is weaker than you, why should you respect him? Since he does not deserve it, tell him so, and be rid of him!

5th person: No, although i do not respect him, i will not say anything because i admire what he is lecturing.

*nothing happens. The 7th person is looking at the 8th person, while talking to his shadow*

7th shadow: That person has almost attained the truth, you can't let him advance farther than you, it will be your undoing! Strike him now, and weaken him, so you may advance first most among all!

7th person: No, he has done nothing wrong! Why should i hurt another because i want to be the best? I shall not listen to you!

*the shadow grows dimmer and after a minute of thinking, the person says*

But i would like to thank you for helping me to realize the truth.

*The shadow stares at him for a minute, as if to make sure that he has discovered the truth, then smiles a genuinely happy smile before fading away completely. The person then smiles and vanishes*
rampant

01-22-07, 07:03 PM		Tirmek - Ummmmmmmmmmm...42?
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-22-07, 07:11 PM		OOC: Breland refers to England ...

(OOC: what with Breland being on the Equator and all ive never got the Breland = Britan thing. We have 3 seasons here. Light wind Heavy rain. Hevy wind Heavy rain. Gailforce wind, heavy rain, and snow. repeat. But aside from the claimate yeah the similartitys are there and with Global warming the way it is Keith may just be ahead of his time )
DungeonJman

01-22-07, 07:43 PM		*an angel appears next to Tirmek*

Nah, that's the answer one layer up.

*disappears and reappears in a throne room*

Look i tried to give him a hint, if he doesn't get it now, he never will.

???: So be it. *stares through several dimensions* Look, i don't understand why i have to do this.

DungeonJ: Look, not many people who come to your layer realize the truth, and i can't let Tirmek stay there until, well you know. He's not native to the dimension and because this is a special case, i got a note from your supervisors up the chain to do this.

???: *stares at the note* Fine, so it shall be. Uh, why am i standing in the shadows?

DungeonJ: It's authorized in the note. Anything that's said could possibly be heard by Tirmek, by forces outside of my control, and since you in the end have to explain everything to him regardless of whether he figures it out on his own or not, i can't let you be revealed, lest the entire lesson is ruined.

???: None of us can really understand these "dramatic reveals", since it is beyond our ability to understand, since we were not created with the ability to understand a large number of the emotions that you mortals feel, but I shall obey the rules that have been set down, as i am but a servant to those above me, who always act in the best possible interest.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-22-07, 08:02 PM		...as i am but a servant to those above me, who always act in the best possible interest.
:blink: *snicker* *giggle* *snort*

...

...

...

...

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHA!!!!!!!!
DungeonJman

01-22-07, 08:07 PM		Exactly which part are you laughing at?
cypher_zero

01-22-07, 08:10 PM		Amusing aint it?
DungeonJman

01-22-07, 08:15 PM		Well, that was annoying, wasn't it?
Kaizer_Ryu

01-22-07, 08:23 PM		Exactly which part are you laughing at?
The part about those above them always acting in their best interest. If there's one thin I've learned from this thread, it's that those above the characters do what they want.

In essence, their pain-

13: -amuses us.

:mad:

13: :D
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-22-07, 08:35 PM		OOC: :ton: award to cypher for creating something possibly annoying (though I've been through far, far worse on a good day), and another to Kaizer for a subtle annoyance portrayed in 13.

Also I laugh at the idea that one can ever know what's best for someone else.
cypher_zero

01-22-07, 08:44 PM		OOC: You can all thank Kaizer for that. It was his sig that inspired it.

"Hmm... S-blocks within s-blocks? I wonder.... :schemes: "
.
DungeonJman

01-22-07, 09:19 PM		Well, now it's time for a piece of wood.
_____________________

THE LARCH

_____________________

*a tree is shown*
rampant

01-23-07, 12:13 AM		Tirmek - How the hell am I supposed to know anything about your screwy cosmology! I mean honestly! Moons?
luna18moon

01-23-07, 12:16 AM		You have to click around 56 times to get to the center of that. That's kind of overkill.
rampant

01-23-07, 12:31 AM		Tirmek - Ok so here shadows are manifestations of our dark impulses. Resisting them causes them to lose an amount of substance, and following them lends them substance. Still nothing? Ok then the idea obviously isn't to dispel the manifestation completely. Or if it is I need to procure another route out.

Shadow T. - I appreciate that.

Tirmek - You're right alot of the time, even if its for different reasons. Ok Right there was bad, can't start thinking of any part of myself as seperate. I am more than the sum of my parts, but they are all still vital.
Paulon

01-23-07, 12:54 AM		Kithle: Kanatash knows better than to horn in on my turf. Now go away. I'm trying to figure out how I can swim in all the gold I was so generously offered for my expertise.

OOPaulon, a very long way away from Kithle: Oh great. Now I'm stuck with this vision of Kithle as being short, with white feathers, and duck feet, swimming around in a pool of money. (Scrooge McDuck with tentacles.) I hope he can't read my mind right now. *ponders* He'd need a microscope to see it, so I should be fairly safe. ;)

*pops over to Tirmek*

OOPaulon: If it's any consolation, I can't work out what he's trying to get you to see either. I think there's some sort of disconnection on some level. Maybe it's a divergence in cultural backgrounds.

*vanishes to ponder some creative writing*
Kaizer_Ryu

01-23-07, 01:27 AM		OOPaulon: If it's any consolation, I can't work out what he's trying to get you to see either. I think there's some sort of disconnection on some level. Maybe it's a divergence in cultural backgrounds.
I'm thinking it's more of a divergence in ethical thinking. Dangerous to implement on a humor thread, especially towards someone else's character. The dichotomy of Good and Evil lends itself to the coin allusion, thus the two coins with both positive and negative aspects makes little to no sense to me. I'm as lost as to the point as the rest of you are.
rampant

01-23-07, 01:40 AM		Tirmek - :shifty: *pulls a blue wolf plushie, with a grey collar that reads Sarah in gold letters, from his pack* Well its not her, but its still cute. *huggle* :zzz:
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-23-07, 07:49 AM		Bunny: My advice: start killing things at random until someone in charge decides you're too dangerous and just hands you the solution.

Silver: That's your solution to everything.

Bunny: Because it works.

Black Mage is praying before a Bunny shrine.
DungeonJman

01-23-07, 09:05 AM		Except the problem is that, if the angel didn't tip you off, this is a strongly lawful aligned and good aligned plane (with a mild evil alignment that coexists with the good). If you try to actually whack somebody, the plane itself will stand in your way.

Bunny: See, even threatening about killing people makes people start to give away the answers.

DungeonJ: Darn it!
urial angel of death

01-23-07, 01:01 PM		I'm thinking it's more of a divergence in ethical thinking. Dangerous to implement on a humor thread, especially towards someone else's character. The dichotomy of Good and Evil lends itself to the coin allusion, thus the two coins with both positive and negative aspects makes little to no sense to me. I'm as lost as to the point as the rest of you are.

You mean morals. Ethics is law/ chaos. Or in essence what society wants you to think are morals. And yes I am the world's fifth best nit-picker not counting lawyers. The ones ahead of me being.

13
Kithle
Wally
Kaizer.
Charles Phipps

01-23-07, 02:08 PM		OOC: To make up for a sadly lengthy absence.

*puts on Lilly's graduate cap and glasses*

As a general note, here is a clarification for how creatures of absolute law and good are to be treated in my campaigns. They're welcome not to be the case here in this thread but I suspect they fit our campaign themes.

The Good Divine Powers; whether Silver Flame, Siberys, or Sovereign Host are tempered with mercy in their interactions with mortal kind. However, their vision of the universe is far more lengthy than most and decisions are for the best interests of all beings. Given that they are not omniscent even on Eberron, they can seem cold and indifferent or even be wrong about how best to handle a situation.

(In our campaign, the overpower IO is the Supreme god of Eberron and may be an Aslan like manifestation of some greater Creator/God of all Universes. Such a being has little truck with mortals though)

Exemplers such as Angels are forbidden from most interactions with humankind and to stay out of the affairs of mortals with rare exception for a reason. This, in addition to explaining why its always up to humans to save their own ass from demonic plots, is largely because they're forces of nature rather than lovable care bears like Aerith.

An Angel that spends too much time on the mortal plane runs the risk of having its eternal and unbreakable will "bent" in which they become Radiant Idols whom confuse their own glory for godhood or believe what the planet needs is a few billion less mortals. Saruman and Sephiroth show how their logic goes. Demons and the like, of course, don't care that they're going to wreck the place when they arrive.

Basically, the mortal world usually requires a little bit of evil or moral compromise to get things done and that screws with Angels sense of the things. This doesn't mean the Neutrals have the right of the universe, far from it, but a mixture of people is needed for the world to go round.

Paladins are the compromise that good makes. Unknown to Paladins, the source of their power is bonding with the spirit of the divine. Blackguards are surprisingly rarer since its more a punishment than a favor for a demon to be bonded to a mortal.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-23-07, 02:16 PM		You mean morals. Ethics is law/ chaos. Or in essence what society wants you to think are morals. And yes I am the world's fifth best nit-picker not counting lawyers. The ones ahead of me being.

13
Kithle
Wally
Kaizer.
True.

But I'm pretty sure 13 and Kithle only nitpick that much because they take such immense pleasure in being annoying.

Oh, wait. I do it for that reason to. Nevermind. :D

IC:

Liam: Good news, everyone!

Jarlot: Oh lords...

Liam: Behold, my latest invention! The Death Clock.

Michael: Cool. How does it work?

Ketler: :mad: I invented that last year and nobody cared!

Jarlot: Quiet you.

Liam: You just put your finger in here *points at a small hole in the top*, and the Death Clock will tell you when you're going to die.

Rose: Is it accurate?

Liam: Well, it's occasionally off by a few seconds, what with free will and all.

Michael: Hey, what's it say for me?

*DING*

Liam: *whistles*

Jarlot: Yikes.

Ketler: Ooo! Dibs on his CD player!

Michael: :weep:

Rose: :confused: You don't want his Porn collection?

Ketler: It's 99% Lisa. You know I don't go for that.
Charles Phipps

01-23-07, 02:33 PM		IC:

*still chained to the wall*

Rose: Did you have ANY idea of what the hell he was talking about?

Jarlot: I think he said that Angels are okay to kill too so long as the EXP was good.

Rose: Are you sure that Lilly is my kid rather than yours?

Jarlot: The genes on his mother's side are strong.

Rose: I'm disturbed that Achika is your mother and daughter.

Jarlot: If the incest vibe is too strong now. Get this, technically that makes Miko Lilly's cousin AND aunt.

Rose: Thankfully, he went with Elina.

Jarlot: What about your pure 'elf genes' and all that?

Rose: Listen, that's just stuff we tell from the Complete Book of Elves so people would think we're more badass than we are.

Jarlot: Your not.

Rose: Dude, it takes 100 years for us to reach maturity. Elves are not the sharpest race in the universe.

Jarlot: I did wonder how Lilly could master Meteor Swarm after ten years and it takes an elf two hundred years.

Rose: Well that's because Lilly is a freak of nature. Fellow was casting fireballs at five years. His first word was Smite.

Jarlot: I got him the Doctor Sseus version of Book of Exalted Deeds.

Rose: You what?

Jarlot: Be Cop. Cop on top. Cop make evil go stop. Then it illustrates various broadsword techniques. I believe the Young Adult version was the G.I. Joe Knowing is Half the Battle series.

Rose: My god, THAT was what those were for.

Jarlot: Yeah, in any case, the Chamber has waited a year and a half of our imprisonment to determine...

Rose: Our ultimate fate?

Jarlot: No, what to have for the Pre-Determination Hearing for lunch. The Committee will then determine whether or we should have a committee to discuss the possibility of holding a pre-trial. The Pre-Trial will likely be approved, in which they may have a meeting over whether to go with a jury or legally appointed justicar. At which point we'll begin a discussion of legal options during the Post-Pre Trial.

Rose:....Dragons are a nation of lawyers?

Jarlot: The Draconic Prophecy was actually created less for human beings than for Dragons to get things done. They're operating at about 4000x their normal speed whenever that is in use.

Rose: It takes them centuries to use it!

Jarlot: I'm aware of that. Our best chance is to seek out...Bahamut.

*A 1ft tall enigmatic Old Man nearby is panned over to*

Old Man: Bahamut....YOU SEEK BAHAMUT!

Jarlot: Okay, apparently you assume none of us have seen the Holy Trilogy and know that you're Bahamut.

Old Man: Uhhh....I don't know what you're talking about.

Jarlot: You'd let us go, then we'd go through an elaborate series of trials, and after proving ourselves....worthy.

*finger wag with his chained hand*

Jarlot: You'd reveal yourself. Possibly after we've failed something and Aerith's ghost reveals herself to speak to you.

Old Man: The boy has no patience.

Aerith's Voice: Was I any different when you taught me?

*A fat platnium Dragon with bipedial legs appears*

Bahamut: YO!

Rose: Holy crap! It's Siberys!

Bahamut: You caught me.

Jarlot: A little help with the chains here?

*Bahamut pulls the keys off the rack and unlocks them*

Jarlot: Finally! A god actually worth a :censored:

Bahamut: In exchange for helping you, you must go on a quest.

Jarlot: :censored: !!!! I *KNEW* you'd pull something like this.

Rose: You have Five Ancient Gold Dragons around you at all times. Why the hell do you need us?

Bahamut: I get off on mortal suffering.

*pause*

Rose: And some mysteries of the universe are finally explained.

Bahamut: Basically, there's a clause that the Dragons have found out about in the Promise Breaker prophecy.

Rose: The prophecy that THEY made?

Bahamut: Yeah, The Chamber has been sneaking in to rewrite it all the itme. Basically, they're going to attempt to kidnap Lisa and raise her as a Dragon Champion to return good to Khovaire.

Rose: What?

Bahamut: It won't work but the fact is that she's in a state of utter blankness right now and they figure she can be used to restore reality. However, if they find out that Sarah has the Mark of Death then :censored: **** all their meetings, they'll burn Khovaire down to a cinder to get at it.

Rose: Why? What's so important about the Mark of Death?

Bahamut: Erandis D'Vol's Mark of Death is duplicated on Sarah. The Half-Dragon supercharged thing has a special ability.

Rose: What's that?

Bahamut: When Sarah or Erandis had it charged fully. The Siberys mark can kill anybody.

Rose: That's not so impressive. Of course, Dragon marks never were to me...

Jarlot: My Lysander mark mocks you with its coolness

Rose: Uh huh.

Bahamut: No, let me explain. It can kill anyone. That includes any Dragon, the Tarrasque, Deathless, or GOD that she encounters.

Rose: So if she met Khyber....

Bahamut: Kiss the Balance thing goodbye forever. Ditto Terra. Which is why the Chamber wants her. They feel that the power on the FF needs to be destroyed....and Sarah can now do it. Satnak to her mom.

Rose; Oh crap. How long do we have?

Bahamut: I got caught up having sex with an Old Witch.

***

Andrea: Mmmmmmm

***

Bahamut: So uhhhh you just missed them.
Charles Phipps

01-23-07, 03:28 PM		King's Citadel

Chief of Security Jacob Hunter: Jack, I'm afraid we're going to have to let you go.

Jack Bauer: What? Why?!

Chief of Security Jacob Hunter: Well your performance on some days is exemplary but uhhh....the rest of the year you don't seem to do anything.

Jack Bauer: You :censored:! Your working with the terrorists aren't you!?

Chief of Security Jacob Hunter: With all due respect Jack, you've got a discipline problem too.

Jack Bauer: I HAD TO KILL HIM! IT WAS HIM OR THEY'D DETONATE THE NUKES!

Chief of Security Jacob Hunter: That's your excuse for your last seven bosses.

Jack Bauer: You just don't love Breland like I do.

Chief of Security Jacob Hunter: Jack, you tortured a tour guide for the location of the King.

Jack Bauer: So?

Chief of Security Jacob Hunter: We have computers to tell you where the White Castle is. You really could have just asked the tour guide. That's what they're there for.

Jack Bauer: Your holding me back.

Chief of Security Jacob Hunter: Well yes, let's just see how you take care of this forgotten freedom problem.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-23-07, 03:41 PM		Bunny: See, even threatening about killing people makes people start to give away the answers.

DungeonJ: Darn it!
OOC: You get the "Oh :censored:" award for falling into a trap of your own design.
…I am the world's fifth best nit-picker not counting lawyers. The ones ahead of me being.

13
Kithle
Wally
Kaizer.
OOC: Wally who?
Bahamut: I got caught up having sex with an Old Witch.

***

Andrea: Mmmmmmm

***

Bahamut: So uhhhh you just missed them.
13: Hey, I though Bahamut's girlfriend was supposed to be a blind, wrinkly old hag.

Michael: But Andrea just……That would mean……

Andrea: (takes off mask to reveal Sora Teraza) Surprise.

Michael: *look of horror that they do not have a smiley for* *RALPH OF DOOM!*
urial angel of death

01-23-07, 05:25 PM		OOC: Wally from Dilbert(tm)

I don't have access to a computer most of the time due to certain recent conditions, But I'll still try to get the way far future done.
rampant

01-23-07, 09:38 PM		Satnak (poking her head out from behind the door) - So you just need to *turns her head behind the door* I can't get this taken care of with you nibbling there. *turns back* any-y-y-y-way *turns* ... *turns back* :rolleyes: just get them to Ketty, she's offered to watch them. *closes door*

Serene - Finally:D

Satnak - Oh now you stop

Serene - I've laid out your costume on the bed, its under the keyblade. :D
-------------------------------

Outside the door

Rashour - *shudder* Poor Satnak, Serene's had that look in her eye all day. Sometimes she scares me.

Dorvos - Hmmmmmmmm!

Rashour - Huh?

Teiza - Aunt Ketty! NOW!

Rashour - When did you get so bossy?

Teiza - When I realized that I can make my eye beams stronger than yours by using my crystal as a lens.

Rashour - Really? Because I thought it started when you infused said crystal with shadow energitics, turning it into living midnight crystal.

Dorvos - Hmmmmm

Rashour - :confused:

Teiza - He just agreed with you.
----------------------------------------

Lisa - There they go.

Sarah - Got it!

Vibrations shake the ship, a vase is moved from its ledge. Fortunately Sarah is waiting for it.

Terra - Great now I'm horny just thinking about those going at it.

Lisa - Sarah?

Sarah - Fine :rolleyes:
----------------------------------

After getting all kids out of the house.

Sarah - (i.h.h. geeze sexiled by my parents)
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-23-07, 09:42 PM		Sarah - (i.h.h. geeze sexiled by my parents)
Silver: :cloud9: award for best new word EVER! :w00t:

OOcat: Says you, maybe.

Silver: I see you're using our tactic against us.

OOcat: Since when is what I say never random?
ratslinky

01-23-07, 09:51 PM		Silver: :cloud9: award for best new word EVER! :w00t:

OOcat: Says you, maybe.

Silver: I see you're using our tactic against us.

OOcat: Since when is what I say never random?

OORatslinky: Since just then the correct reply was "I like ice cream"
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-23-07, 10:00 PM		OORatslinky: Since just then the correct reply was "I like ice cream"
OOcat: Unfortunately you are under the mistaken impression that something said randomly cannot sound like something said not randomly.

13: Stop hogging my schtick!
ratslinky

01-23-07, 10:54 PM		OORatslinky: Ah but the English language has billions of different possible lines so what are the chances of you saying the right thing I'd say they are very small so why is it that almost all of your posts have been sounding non random?
DungeonJman

01-23-07, 10:55 PM		Because the most random thing of all would be to choose the correct thing out of all the possible wrong ones.
ratslinky

01-24-07, 01:13 AM		OORatslinky: Interesting idea DungeonJman
rampant

01-24-07, 02:06 AM		OOC: Can't actually take credit for that one Silver its been in use for at least the last half decade. It refers primarily to getting kicked out of your shared dorm overnight, because your roomie is having someone over.

Rixle - Best plan is just to join them.

Silver - I like the way you think.
Charles Phipps

01-24-07, 02:56 AM		Elina: Bwa Ba boo.

Goth Elina: Oh quit your whining! No one cares if your traumatized!

Elina: Boo?

Wizard Elina: Being the genius that I am. I recognize that her trauma is genuine and she has divorced all conscious thought from her mind. Her psychic fragments have since taken on a life of their own well and above her lusty side.

Aline: I'm Lust.

Goth Elina: We know.

Baby Elina: *sucks on pacifier*

Goth Elina: And you STOLE Lilly's graduate cap and glasses?

Wizard Elina: I look more superior in intellect with these.

Sarah Elina: I think we should recognize that she needs some good sisterly love to come out of this!

Goth Elina: That would be less disturbing if you weren't Elina's latent bisexuality.

Elina: Baayyyyyyy!

*Elina is creeped out by all her alternate personalities*

Miko Elina: Well I'm upset too darnit! How can we take over the world like this?

Wizard Elina: We don't need your advice Evil Elina.

Aerith Elina: What we need to do is LOVE EVERYONE.

Monk Elina: You filthy *****bag Aerith! You stole Cloud!

Aerith Elina: Tiffa Elina!

*Elina's Good and Disciplined side get into a fist fight*

Elina: Wwaaaaaaaaaah!

*Satnak then blasts all of her personalities*

Satank: Oh Crap! I may have just destroyed Elina's mind!

Lilly: GAH! WHAT!?

Satnak: I thought they were alternates!

*Epic Elina descends from the Heavens in Chuck Norris's outfit before knocking Satnak Cold*
DungeonJman

01-24-07, 08:56 AM		*back in wherever, Tirmek wakes up*

Tirmek: *after yawning* Well, i knew that 42 was the answer for something. Wait, why was there an angel here, unless i'm not in hell, but...

*vanishes and reappears about a couple hundred feet away from a black castle*

Tirmek: Well, i guess whatever else i'm supposed to learn is in there.

*begins walking*
______________________

OOC: Didn't see THAT coming, did you? Before i get any complaints about this, let me explain in the next post. Actually, it's going to take a couple of posts to explain this.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-24-07, 09:15 AM		*Epic Elina descends from the Heavens in Chuck Norris's outfit before knocking Satnak Cold*
Bunny: All roight! Time to kill!

Epic Elina spits. Sharn blows up.

Coward Elina (who was obviously hiding when Satnak came around): H-h-happy nnnnnnnow?

Bunny: Nah. Sharn blows up whenever a butterfly lands on something.

A butterfly lands in Elina's head.

*BOOOOOOOOOOM!*

Elminster (animé-style burnt): Iregretnothinnnnnnnnnnnggggg………………
rampant

01-24-07, 04:04 PM		Lily - Ok lets try another one. *pulls a slip of paper out of a hat* Hey this one is Satnak's!

Elina - :eek:

Lily - 300 laps with another 5 pounds.
--------------
Later

Elina - :ghosted:

Lily - Just another 50!
-------------------------

Elina (now a pretty shade of orange) - :mad:

Lily - Ok, I admit that maybe Chalky's plan was not the bestone. Oh Kithle's plan, he's really smart.

Elina - :raincloud
DungeonJman

01-24-07, 07:10 PM		*as Tirmek walks into the castle, he finds a directory board*

Tirmek: Wow, they really do try to be helpful up here.

*heads to the throne room, which is behind a large door*

Tirmek: Ok, so this is it. *stares up* Well, i'd better find the best spot to push, so that I can open the door, since there's no way to distribute force down here.

*as he is talking the door opens, and he is knocked back by an aura of evil. Now, this isn't your ordinary, average, out of the blue..... AAAAAAAAAGH!!! *

DungeonJ: Thank you Chalky, i'll take over from here.

*Anyway, the aura of evil is extremely overwhelming, but feels different from any archdevil, demon lord, or even that of a daemon lord. and an angel is sitting in the middle of the throne room*

???: Approach

Tirmek: *getting up off of the floor* ouch, how did that? Wait a minute, if this is heaven, then what's with the aura of...

???: Well who do you think you're standing before?
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-24-07, 07:52 PM		???: Well who do you think you're standing before?
Silver: Any bishonen villain ever.

13: The baby in the sun from Teletubbies.

Bunny: Ronald McDonald.
DungeonJman

01-24-07, 08:25 PM		???: I can't understand why how you mortals can find such things funny, then again, i can't understand the concept of humor, so there you go.

Tirmek: *whispering to DungeonJ* then why are the E.B.N.E.'s allowing this guy?

*voice appears in Tirmek's head*

DungeonJ: Because some of the things he says are unintentionally funny.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-24-07, 08:39 PM		DungeonJ: Because some of the things he says are unintentionally funny.
OOcat: Lovely, he's getting the hang of it.
DungeonJman

01-24-07, 10:34 PM		???: Now for the lesson that you have come here for. What is the point of evil?

Tirmek: To serve as the counter balancing, and equally opposite force to good, to commit great acts of horror, things like that.

???: *smacks his head* oh, so i see that the intermediary was really rendered incapable of doing his job.

Tirmek: What?

???: An intermediary was assigned to watch over the development of your world, but unfortunately, the assistants that were sent to help him went... a little crazy. Happens to angels every so often. Since we can't be perfect 100% of the time, and because of our nature, we make mistakes approximately every 600 years. Such as the one's in recent history. *begins talking to himself* I can forgive the one that happened 2000 years ago, and the one that happened 1350 years ago. The one that happened 700 years ago was an accident, so that's not even a question, but the one that happened 60 years ago? What was that angel thinking by convincing that scientist to give a potentially dangerous idea to that country. "Oh, i didn't know that they were going to use it as a weapon." he said. "I didn't know that as a weapon it could kill 120,000 people and render the land unusable" he said. But he knew, that STUPID...

Tirmek: Uh, sorry to interrupt the monologue, but can we please get back to the main point.

???: Oh, sorry. That usually doesn't happen. Anyway....
rampant

01-24-07, 11:44 PM		Tirmek - I'm sorry I don't have many ranks in extraplanar mythology, or philosophy.

13 - Seriously the kid had no idea what a Kordian Holiday was like.
DungeonJman

01-25-07, 12:00 AM		???: It's not mythology, at least by what you have seen. Anyway, so these assistants that double crossed the intermediary tried running the world on their own. Not having any experience, they had no idea what to do, so they created a... for lack of a better language say "instruction manual" on how to keep the universe working. In order to cover up the fact that they did this, they created a second "false" document which pretends to predict the future. However, one of them wanted to reveal that it was they who ran the universe, so that the future mortals would fear them, while another feared that it would give away their weaknesses. I believe that you know the rest of the story.

Tirmek: Ok, that puts a weird perspective on things, but what were you saying in the first place?

???: Oh yes, that evil and good are similar to 2 coins. The positive side of good is to help others and make the world a better place, while the negative, is to fight evil and use that as an excuse to hurt others. The negative side of evil is what you described before, but the positive side is to use evil as a tool. It allows you to be involved in things that you would otherwise remain neutral in, and forces you to choose what is right based on free will. Overcoming evil actually helps to enlighten a person and make them better individuals. The problem with pride, which is what brought you here, is that you may be using it for a good purpose, but the emotions feeding it were negative and needed to be overcome, and focused upon the right emotions, so you could become closer to good, which you have failed to do. Also, since we already figured out that you needed this, we wanted you as a guiding hand for things.

Tirmek: WHAT!??!

???: See, the one you refer to as the "Promise Breaker will reveal to all the others in your universe about the fallen assistants, but only the one who now bears the "shadow of death" can actually get them out of the picture so the assistant can get back to doing his job. If that is to work, then she needs to wipe out ALL three, and not just the one whom you call "evil". You may choose to ignore any of this, about evil, or about the 3 misguided ones, but you needed to at least hear about it. Since one may not make choices if they are restricted to one side.

*Tirmek vanishes and appears back on the Forgotten Freedom*

OOC: You guys can also ignore this as the idea for the progenitor dragons if you want. So don't flame about me messing with the "already been planned" ideas.
rampant

01-25-07, 12:29 AM		Sarah - Tirmek! Where have you been!?

Ketty - What's the matter with you running off without a word!?

Tirmek - DUNGEON DID IT!

OODungeonJman - SNITCH!

Tirmek - Better than being dead.

OODungeon (being dragged away to be tied to John) - Hate you!

Lily - THATS MY LINE!
-------------------------------------

later

Tirmek - Ok, not that I don't appreciate the attention, but could you please let me breathe a little.

Sarah - (hugging Tirmek) No.
DungeonJman

01-25-07, 10:58 AM		OODungeon (being dragged away to be tied to John)

*Later*

Ouch, ouch, ouch
:rant: :hoppingmad: :mad: :eek:


Well, it's not too bad, wait...OOOOOOOOWWWWW!!!!

At least i don't mind the lecture.

Tirmek: What?

DungeonJ: Oh yeah, the lectures that John gives are essentially philosophical lectures on the virtues of morality, and since you know from that escapade i sent you on that i like philosophy. In addition, i've actually made philosophical comments that have stumped people years older than me, to prove that. Combined with the fact that i adhere to a very high standard of morality, means that i view the lecture as an actual lecture, and not as torture.

Jarlot: *hears this from the dungeon and yells* WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?!

Rose: Who are you talking to?

Jarlot: Someone else, but i guess that it stands for you too.
Lord Kale Fangblade

01-25-07, 12:36 PM		DungeonJ: Oh yeah, the lectures that John gives are essentially philosophical lectures on the virtues of morality, and since you know from that escapade i sent you on that i like philosophy. In addition, i've actually made philosophical comments that have stumped people years older than me, to prove that. Combined with the fact that i adhere to a very high standard of morality, means that i view the lecture as an actual lecture, and not as torture.

.

OOKale: He's ENJOYING the lecture? Must reassurt punishment.

waves a hand, and Devon appears holding a rather large book of poetry and his guitare

OOKale: do your stuff.

Devon beings to play and sing and the ears of people all over eberron begin to bleed...
DungeonJman

01-25-07, 12:39 PM		AAAAAAAH!!! It burns! It burns! Why will it not stop? This worse than Prometheus having his liver torn out and eaten by that eagle every day! AAAAAAH!
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-25-07, 12:58 PM		AAAAAAAH!!! It burns! It burns! Why will it not stop? This worse than Prometheus having his liver torn out and eaten by that eagle every day! AAAAAAH!
Bunny (riding said eagle): DIE ALREADY!
cypher_zero

01-25-07, 01:05 PM		OOC: Anyone else ever wonder why the eagle only eats the liver? I mean, there's plenty of other good organs in there...
.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-25-07, 01:22 PM		OOC: Its an organ deep in the body so having it eaten hurts insanely, but survival noncritical so you live to suffer. Also its the first part of a kill that a hunter eats, rich in carbs to reagin energy after the hunt
cypher_zero

01-25-07, 01:26 PM		OOC: You too that way too seriously man...
.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-25-07, 02:05 PM		Bunny: Eled is now allowed to wear an official Bunny hat.

Eled: The kind with razor-sharp ears that surve as throwing knives with the returning special ability?

Bunny: Of course.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-25-07, 03:43 PM		Tirmek: So that's why you always go for the liver?

Sarah: Mmmmmm...carbs...
rampant

01-25-07, 04:16 PM		Teiza - Me, I like the brains and eye-balls.

Elina - That explains alot.

Teiza - (holding a bowl of birdheads and eating them like pop-corn) Like what?
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-25-07, 05:46 PM		OOC: Its an organ deep in the body so having it eaten hurts insanely, but survival noncritical so you live to suffer. Also its the first part of a kill that a hunter eats, rich in carbs to reagin energy after the hunt
13: Did you hear that, O diet slaves?

Diet Slaves: AAAUUUUGGGGHHHHH!!! More diet info that we must incorporate into our eternal quest to gain satisfaction by telling ourselves that our current selves are Crp!!!!!

OOcat: You'll probably get busted for some kind of political correctness.

13: What, saying that fad dieters need to lighten up? :confused:

OOcat: Yeah, you're right. :P
rampant

01-25-07, 08:38 PM		Terra - Impressive.

Teiza - What do you mean Sensei?

Terra - You study hard all day with Satnak, you hunt your own meals, and you can still maintain perfect focus by the time you get to me.

Teiza - Is this about that sleep thing again?
rampant

01-25-07, 10:08 PM		Teiza - Watch it Momo! Scias! *glare* Do not swipe from people making stuff. It never ends well. Nina stop sending Dies off to save injured animals. Dies stop interrupting me when I'm eating!
DungeonJman

01-25-07, 10:14 PM		*After the poetry reading*

Ok, now that was extremely painful. *takes out a yo-yo with a ying-yang symbol that's missing a dot and begins playing with it and sighs*

Well, now i've got nothing to do except for swinging around the Ying Yo-Yo.

*portal appears as he says the name and disappears after a minute*

Hmmm, i wonder what i could do with this.

OOC: Just a thought, i really don't have anything planned. I promise that i have nothing besides the Ying and Yang Yo-Yos, so i won't be springing anything else crazy from Xiaolin Showdown (except for two martial arts moves which will be counted as swordsage manuvers, so they don't really count).
rampant

01-25-07, 10:25 PM		Terra - (i.h.h. her awareness is increasing, she can already pierce the veils around the younger kids)

Teiza - (not moving or opening her eyes, any of them) Momo if that blows up, I'll melt your secret project down for scrap metal.

Momo - (trying to sneak up behind Teiza with a suspicious looking sphere) :(
DungeonJman

01-25-07, 11:04 PM		*A redshirt is walking through the lower decks of the ship, looking for Erk's Place*

DungeonJ: *from the floor below the redshirt* Ying Yang Yo Yo!

*uses the yo-yo's on the floor the redshirt is standing on, and he falls through. DungeonJ then walks over the entrance to the bar before doing it again and watching the confused redshirt come out of the portal and walk into the bar.*

13: :mad: That's the most annoying thing that you could think of?

Hey, i've only had an hour to think.
rampant

01-26-07, 01:56 AM		Satnak - Dorvos stop whistling at that frequency, you're driving Sarah snd Scias nutty.

Tirmek - Yes please stop, she's about bitten through my arm.

Serene - No Teiza, you can't launch Corre with the catapult.

Terra - Momo, stop it with the silly string.

Lisa - Elina, no, put down the itchy grenade.

Ketty - You four are certainly busy.

Terra - Wouldn't

Serene - have it

Lisa - any other

Satnak - way.
urial angel of death

01-26-07, 12:11 PM		OOC: Disclaimer: Any and all religious groups, sercet societies, and/or governments I use will only use d20 dark*matter as a source of information. Please do not get mad at me for mistakes.

IC: Satnak: So what exactly are we supposed to be doing?

Izzy: Ssshhh.

Izzy points across the aisle to a red-haired woman in a white trenchcoat. Sewn on it below her right shoulder is a design, featuring a golden rose super imposed on a silver cross. She appears to be deep in thought. A man in a black tranchcoat walks over to her table and sits down across from her. The white siluette of a one eyed pyramid is shown on his back.

Man: Why hello Lisa. Now what were the chances I'd se you here Lisa. What a coinsidence.

Lisa: Micheal, you and I both know there is no such thing as coinsidence.

Micheal: So you're looking for it too?

Lisa: Yes, but I unlike you will live to find it!

A bullet shoots out of Lisa's gun, which had finally been brought into position under the table.

At the same moment a loud crash followed closely by numerous screams is heard from several cars down.
rampant

01-26-07, 12:51 PM		Satnak - (i.h.h. WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON? well? I know you can hear me. )
rampant

01-26-07, 06:13 PM		Hyrd - Ivy have nice hair, so soft. *sniff*

Lily - GET A ROOM!

Elina - :mad: (i.h.h. my line) *stomp*

Lily - EAAAAAAHH! *jumps up and down on one foot holding the other*
Charles Phipps

01-26-07, 10:01 PM		Lisa: We really need to start thinking about what to do.

Terra: Well this aftern...

Lisa: About THRANE.

Terra: I'm not sure I see the problem.

Lisa: I do! After Jaela retired, she left the control of the country in the hands of the Council of the Dukes! They're actually WORSE in some ways that Cardinal Kronzen! They're all about a bunch of chaunanistic religious fanatics!

Terra: Well, we're sort of stuck with Elina being the Promise Breaker in most people's minds.

Lisa: We've got to convince them otherwise!

Terra: It won't be that easy! The Dragons have programmed an aversion on a genetic level into the people.

Lisa: When she's sixteen and the world hasn't ended then the prophecy is proven true and just because they're worried about HER doesn't mean they're worried about US.

Terra: I don't get your meaning.

Lisa: The Dukes are the ones that killed mother and they're protected by forces beyond normal skill. Probably the Chamber. That means they might be a key to finally breaking their hold on my people. I won't see my people enslaved further by evil men acting in the name of my religion!

Terra: You want us to go to war?

Lisa: Yes, with the people of Thrane behind us so that the new country we forge can be a part of their own hands!

Terra: Another reason I love you. Who will watch Sarah and Elina though while we trouble ourselves with a bunch of Ex-Space Marines and ultraconservatives?

Lisa: Well I invited my cousin to be the kid's tutor....

***

Quistis: Now turn to page seventy one...

Lilly: *drool*

Sarah: *wags tail* I like her already!
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-26-07, 10:20 PM		Chanse "Chanse Random reporting for duty" Salutes.

Lisa "What with the what now?"

Chanse "Your going to war, iether you need a spy, namely me, or you need an assasin, namely me, or you need a finly traned fraud- Quartermaster. Namely me. besides Im about the only one on this blasted ship not in epic levels and I need the Exp."

Lisa "I dont know if you can trust you..."

Chanse "You know where I live and could squash me like a bug. Next question."

Lisa "Why would I need a quartermaster with no army yet?"

Chanse "I can fix taht too, fair whak of the crew are loyal to me still"

Lisa "Bloodthirsty pirates as I recall?"

Chance "Pot, kettle black? Your starting a war, and this way you give the orders and if we go too far yuo can get us to stop."

Lisa "So your main reason for me hiring you is taht you'll be worse if I dont?"

Chanse "Nooo, my main reason for being hired by you is the money [or an introduction to your cousin ;) ] Your main reason for hiing me is that as a band of self serving looters we'll case a lot more problems."
Charles Phipps

01-26-07, 10:53 PM		OOC: Hehehe, I love Chance.

He's like Jack Sparrow's slightly slower brother.
Charles Phipps

01-26-07, 11:24 PM		Campaign War Journal

Red Shirt vs. Blue Shirt

Red Base

Simons: Ever wonder why we're here?

Grif: It's one of life's great mysteries isn't it. Why are we here? I mean, are we the product of some cosmic coincidence or... is there really a God, watching everything? Y'know, with a plan for us and stuff? I don't know man, but it keeps me up at night.

[Simmons stares at him]

Simons:: What? I mean why are we out here, in this canyon?

Grif: Oh, I don't know.

Simons What was that stuff about god?

Grif: Nothing

Simons: You want to talk about it?

Grif: No

Simmons: Are you sure?

Grif: Yes

Simons: The only reason that we set up a red base here, is because they have a blue base over there. And the only reason they have a blue base over there is because we have a red base here.

Grif: Yeah, that's because we're fighting each other.

Simons: Yeah, but if we were to pull out today, and they were to come take over our base, they'd have two bases in the middle of a box canyon. Whoop de :censored: doo.

Sergeant Jarlot: Alright ladies! It's time to hear the latest news from Terra's army Command!

Griff: I was so totally recruited under false pretenses.

Simons: I joined because it was a holy war to free the Motherland from evil tyranny!

Griff: I joined because I misunderstood what 'The Lesbian's Army' meant.

Sergeant Jarlot: Quiet you two! This news concerns us all.

Griff: Is the war over? Can we go home?

Sergeant Jarlot: That's exactly it, private! War's over. We won. Turns out you're the big hero, and we're going to hold a parade in your honor. I get to drive the float and Simmons here, is in charge of confetti!

Griff: I'm no stranger to Sarcasm sir.

Sergeant Jarlot : God dammit private, shut your mouth or else I'll have Simmons slit your throat while you're asleep!

Simmons: Oh, I'd do it too.

Sarge: I know you would Simmons... good man.

Sergeant Jarlot: The Glorious War to Retake Thrane...Called "The Not-So-Last War" is proceeding briskly and without incident. Unfortunately, because all of Terra's battleplans depended on the anti-Magic field that covers the country to not work, we're sort of stuck with conventional weapons.

Griff: I blame the intervention of all powerful entities to make the ridiculously overpowered leaders of this army not solve the war in an hour.

Sergeant Jarlot: Damn redshirts! Getting uppity!

*cracks whip*

Griff: AH! WHY DO YOU HAVE A WHIP!?

Sergeant Jarlot: For whipping! But Terra Command has decreed we're going to have our foces increased for our next offensive.

Simmons: Great, we're getting a rookiee.

***

Blue Base

Lilly: So what are they doing?

Tirmek: They're just STANDING there and TALKING. They were standing there five minutes ago when you asked and in another five, they'll STILL be standing there and TALKING.

Lilly: Excuse me. I don't have the fricking sniper crossbow!

Tirmek: No way am I letting you have the Sniper Crossbow!

Lilly: I wonder why the evil army of the Red Shirts is fighting against our glorious Blue Army of Lisa

Tirmek: I dunno but Lisa Command said we were supposed to take position here and watch for enemy forces. Those morons certainly look like it.

*continues watching*

Lilly: .....so what are they talking about?
Charles Phipps

01-26-07, 11:44 PM		War Journal 2

Red Shirt Vs. Blue Shirt

Red Base

Ishmael III: Hello sir! I'm ready and willing to fight some aliens!

Griff: What? Aliens?

Ishmael III: We are being invaded by Warhammer monsters right?

Griff: Dude, that was like LAST MONTH. Ancient History now in D&D worlds.

Simmons: We're now fighting the Blue army that may or may not be connected to the Five Thranish Dukes.

Ishmael III Ok....ay. Why do we all have Space Marine armor then?

Griff: It's the cheapest Full Plate you'll ever buy!

Simmons: In any case, Sarge isn't here right now and he left me in charge.

Griff: Because you're such a kiss ass.

Simmons: In any case, we think you need to go on an errand for us....

Griff: Yeah, get some headlight fluid...and elbow grease...from the store.

Blue Base

*Three armored warriors admire their new Lightning Cart with warforged personality matrix and giant Wand of Fireballs*

Doog II: So I say to the guy, "How you going to get the tank down to the planet?" And he goes, "I'll just put it on the ship." And I go, "If you've got a ship that can carry a tank, why not just put guns on the ship and use it instead?"

Tirmek: Hey kid?

Doog III Yeah?

Tirmek: You're ruining the moment. Shut up.

Doog III: Oh. OK. You got it man!

Lilly: You know, I was wrong. You could totally pick up chicks in this thing. Maybe two or three apiece.

Tirmek: What would you do with three women?

Lilly: Tirmek, women are like Voltron. The more you can hook up, the better it gets.

Doog II: So do you have a girl back home?

Lilly: Yeah.

Doog II: Girlfriend or wife?

Lilly: Naaahhhh, she's just my girlfriend. We thought about getting married but I shipped out first.

Tirmek: What the hell are you talking about? Elina never liked you and then went utterly insane.

Lilly: Oh like your relationship with Sarah is any better since Quistis put her through that super mercenary training.

Tirmek: The Berserker Spirit Bonded to her mark doesn't make her psychotically vengeful....much.

Doog II: My dad...Doog I not Ishmael....always said why buy the Dinosaur when you could get the milk for free.

Lilly: Did you just call my girlfriend a Dinosaur?

Tirmek: No, I think he just called her a ****.

Doog II: Whoops.
rampant

01-27-07, 01:29 AM		In the tank patrolling the area

Lily - Turn left and blow up that bush we just passed.

Tirmek - Ok let me find the turret contr-

Lily - NO! turn the tank around!

Tirmek - But we can just swivel th-

Lily - TURN THE TANK!

Tirmek - Of all the rotten commanders, I liked it better when HQ had fogotten i existed.

Lily - OOoh I am so declaring war on you.

Tirmek - Finish the other three wars you're in. You declared war on your toast this morning.

Lily - It came at me with a knife!

Tirmek - That was me.

Lily - Haha you have confessed to being allied to the toast!
Charles Phipps

01-27-07, 02:01 AM		OOC: Hehehe about the toast.

Red Shirt versus Blue Shirt

Day 3

Blue Base

Lilly: I blame you for losing the flag.

Tirmek: ME!? You're the moron who put Doog on guard duty.

Doog II: You said the next person I'd meet would be General Rose!

Lilly: Okay, let's stay calm. What's the worst thing that could happen if they have our flag.

Tirmek: They could use it to pretend to be friendly forces, walk up to Lisa's tent and kill her in her sleep.

Lilly: ....

Tirmek: Yes, I don't know why they don't manufacture a flag for that either.

Lilly: Okay, we have to use the portal to catch up to him.

Tirmek: What? Why don't we just run after him? He's running around randomly here!

Lilly: And expose ourself to enemy fire? Hell no. The portal it is.

Tirmek: I'm not getting in that thing. Ketler built it.

Lilly: Look, it's perfectly safe. We tested it.

Tirmek: Tossing rocks in it does not constitute testing it by any means! They also came out hot and covered in black stuff!

Lilly: What are you afraid of?

Tirmek: That its a portal through the Plane of Shadow and I may lose my soul.

Lilly: Please....

*powers it up*

Lilly: Now I ORDER you...

*Tirmek kicks Lilly through the portal*

Tirmek: Okay now it's tested.

*pause*

Doog II: I don't see him.

Tirmek: Okay.....now we need a new plan to catch up.

***

Red Base

Simmons: Good job Rookie!

Ishmael III: Errr....glad the flag is enough. They didn't have anything else at the store.

Griff: The what now?

Ishmael III: You know! The store! The place you buy weapons, healing potions, and headlight fluid at!

Griff: You've been MUDing in place of actual tabletop haven't you....

Ishmael III: Only a little!

Griff: So uhh....what do we do with the flag now?

Simmons: Ummmm.....I dunno, I never thought about it.

Griff: doesn't this mean we win the war?

Simmons: I think that's perciptated by taking the enemies CAPITAL rather than the flag.

Griff: Oh shut up!
rampant

01-27-07, 02:18 AM		Ivy - Suck Plushie Grenade!

Ish3 - Oh Frack!

Boom!

Hyrd - Hyrd return flag:D *touch*

Blue team returned the flag

-------------------------------------

Tirmek - (comming) ghost leader in position

Doog II - (comming) Ghost runner ready.

Lily - Lets this candle. *Fires a rocket at the base*
-------------------------------------------------

Simmons - Arrrrrgh

Lily killed simmons

Lily - whoohoo...What's that sound? *Looks up* awww :censored:

Smush

Cole - (flying a banshee) :evillaugh:

Cole Killed Lily
---------------------------

Blue base

2
1
Lily - Ow, next time respawn me right side up!
Charles Phipps

01-27-07, 02:27 AM		Red Shirt vs. Blue Shirt

Day Four

Terra and Lisa Army High Command

Rose: YO!

*Rose talks into his crystal ball*

Rose: How's it hanging Blue base, still holding it against the hordes of the enemy?

*the ball gets Tirmek's face on it*

Tirmek: Uh, I'm not so sure it's a HORDE per say. However, we need more men!

*Rose pauses*

Rose: Tirmek, does Sarah know about these urges....

Tirmek: Not like that! Uhhh...Lilly by his own self and choice...stepped into the portal and now he's gone.

Rose: Uh huh. Well, in any case, I can send you a troop of Lisa's All-Female Order of Paladins with a fondness for sexy lingerie and bathing each other.

Tirmek: ewwww no! I don't think about any women but Sarah like that!

Doog II: Lilly will be glad we made this decision without him

Rose: I bet he will. Or I can send you a freelancer.

Tirmek: You mean a neutral high level mercenary paid to kill?

Rose: Yep!

Tirmek: Awesome! Send her right....

Rose: Hold on, I got another call on the line.

*shakes the crystal ball*

*Griff's face appears*

Griff: Oh NOW it works.

Simmons: Help! We think the enemy has just called for reinforcements!

Rose: Oh crap. Well you'll just to make do. I just sent the last freelancer to the fortress closest to you.

Griff: Damnit! Where ARE those guys, they're never around when the enemy makes an attack!

Rose: Well if you're too dumb to figure that out then that's not my problem. Still, Sergeant Jarlot should be arriving any time with Animal Companion....and Lopez.

Griff: Our what?

*Rose shakes the crystal ball*

Zella: Curse you for not picking up groceries!

*Rose shakes it HARDER*

Honor Harrington: You promised me you'd come visit me here on Grayson!

Rose: Uhhhh....a war came up.

Honor Harrington: Ooooo...war.

***

Red Base

Sergeant Jarlot: This gentlemen....is the Land Shark.

Simmon: You mean a Bulette sir?

Griff: Question, why is it called a Land Shark? It doesn't look anything like a shark and it tunnels.

Sergeant Jarlot: Because that's what the Monstrous Manual calls it reject!

Griff: Well, why not call it a Tunneling Giant Armadillo.

Sergeant Jarlot: Arma...what? Stop making up animals!

Griff: What?

Sergeant Jarlot: There ain't no such creature in the Monstrous Manual! Therefore it doesn't exist.

Griff: Uh huh. So why not a Giant Mole then?

Simmons: You mean a Brain Mole?

Griff: No, I mean a mole mole.

Sergeant Jarlot: You and your mythical creatures. In any case, our best addition is Lopez the warforged! Back from tuning at Command!

Griff: Wait, Lopez is a Warforged?!

Simmons: Well DUh.

Griff: I just thought he was.....armored.

Sergeant Jarlot: the fact he doesn't sleep and drinks W-D-Cannith Motor oil didn't tip you off?

Griff: I thought he had insomnia....and the motor oil was just to impress us.

***

Blue Base

Tirmek: Okay, screw it. We can't wait for the Freelancer. We've got to attack the Red Base now.

Lilly: *Emerges from the Plane of Shadow* OH MY GODS...

Tirmek: Oh NOW you come back!

Lilly: How many....centuries.....has it been.....oh Tirmek, you look like when I left you.

Tirmek: Lilly....

Doog II: Hello Nice Paladin man.

Lilly: Oh my...you must be Doog's distant descendent! Thousands of years removed from my own time, your people have flourished and the world is now dominated by Half-orcs!

Tirmek: Lilly....

*Lilly gets on his knees*

Lilly: DAMN YOU! DAMN YOU! DAMN YOU FILTHY ORCS!

Tirmek: Lilly! You were gone ten minutes!

Lilly: Oh, let's get in the tank then.

Tirmek: Well now that you're here and can drive it.

Lilly: What? I can't use a tank.

Tirmek: :blink: What? Your NOT armor certified?

Lilly: I can't even use the fricking Exotic Weapon Propheciency Sniper Crossbow!

Tirmek: :censored: WHO WOULD SEND US A TANK WE CAN'T DRIVE!?

***

Terra and Lisa Command

Rose: That's it...talk dirty to me Honor.
Charles Phipps

01-27-07, 02:44 AM		Blue base

2
1
Lily - Ow, next time respawn me right side up!

Take a Space Warrior point :fett: for the Halo.
rampant

01-27-07, 02:53 AM		Kithle - You really should know better than to encourage him.
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Lily - We have ways of making you talk!

Toast - ...

Lily - Tough guy eh? *pulls out a knife and some jelly*

Toast - ...

Lily - Now you can talk, or i can spread this over your surface. It will ooze into your crispy outer layer, and soften you up nicely.

Toast - ...

Lily - I tried to be reasonable. Hurg!, gek!, rag! stupid lid is stuck.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-27-07, 08:10 AM		Lilly: Oh my...you must be Doog's distant descendent! Thousands of years removed from my own time, your people have flourished and the world is now dominated by Half-orcs!
OOcat: And gnolls.

Lilly: What?

OOcat: There was this product I got only once, preposed a world in which the orcs and gnolls won the "war" that's always going on between them and everyone else and set up lording it over everyone British style. Also humans were savage barbarians. By Nothing, that was a great product.

Lilly: And why are you telling me this?

OOcat: :confused: Hello? Random spoutings here?

Lilly: Well, then, guess I'll ignore—

OOcat: Oh, yeah………forgot about this part:

The crystal shakes. Since no one else is around, Lilly picks it up.

Rose: Oh, good, I've reached you. I have some urgent news: while spying for us, NJ26 found out that—

Lilly: NJ26 is working for us? I thought Erk's Place was neutral.

Rose: Neutral, yes. Adverse to being paid, no. We're just lucky the dukes are fanatical about drink. Anyway, the dukes hired a legion of those mercenary gnolls from Droaam.

Lilly: Well, that's bad.

Rose: Wait……(checks some papers)……sorry, I was off there.

Lilly: By how much?

Rose: They hired all the gnolls form Droaam.

Lilly: :eek:
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-27-07, 08:24 AM		Rose: ………I can send you a troop of Lisa's All-Female Order of Paladins with a fondness for sexy lingerie and bathing each other.
Silver: :evillaugh Yes, and I have been teaching them the Terra and Lisa method.

13: :emp: At last my plan to chause chaos with sexy yet incredibly clumsy girls is reaching this world.

Bunny: :bored:………………I'm going to go blow someone up.

13: No, don't you see…………nosebleeds.

Bunny: No character has ever been successfully killed by a nosebleed. This is why I'm Death and you're Annoyance.
Tirmek: :censored: WHO WOULD SEND US A TANK WE CAN'T DRIVE!?
13: Okay, my squirrel minions, "misplaced" supply requisitions go over here.……Now remember that you send people stuff "they can't possibly use right now………except maybe by accident and/or because it kills people".……:blink:……Bunny's been in my instructions.
Lily - I tried to be reasonable. Hurg!, gek!, rag! stupid lid is stuck.
13: Ah, the jar lid. This such device as laid low many a great man. :weep: So proud.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-27-07, 10:45 AM		Lisa has assigned Chance and his men to a unit of her 'All-Female Order of Paladins with a fondness for sexy lingerie and bathing each other.' In the hopes of keeping him in line.

Chance "Well Ladies, it seems there’s nothing to do but wait. Any one up for a few hands of poker?" produces a deck of playing cards from thin air, fans then with a flourish. "Sharn Stud rules?"

Female paladin, emerging from the Barracks showers wrapped in a towel "Oh we would, only this isn’t Sharn, and you aren’t a stud."

Chance :weep:

Female paladin, now Toweling her hair with her back to him "But give me a moment to dress and we can play it by Karnathi Winter rules." ;)

Chance "Isn’t that a kind of stri- :mymy: I'm in! :drool: "

*****

Fifteen minutes latter, Chance is sitting at a long table in soulmelds and boxers surrounded by lithe female paladins still in there form fitting full plate

Chance, Ihh " What is wrong with me? I haven’t won a hand since we started, not one hand! :twitch: "

Female paladin, Ihh " :smirk: Think I should tell him we can all see his cards reflected in his Silvertongue Mask? Nahhh :schemes: "

(OOC: Thanks Charles, as a general rule it seems the more unapologetically self serving a character is the more fun he is. Kina like Wally from Dilbert.)
rampant

01-27-07, 12:03 PM		Lily - Still nothing? You are one tough bastard.

Toast with jelly - ...

Lily - Since you seem unconcerned with yourself. *Lily sets down a tray with another slice of toast, and a jar of peanutbutter*
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-27-07, 12:12 PM		OOC: rampant wins a :looloo: for being a crazy E.B.N.E.
rampant

01-27-07, 12:40 PM		Kithle - What did I say about encouraging him:mad:
---------------------------------------------------------------

Cole - Did you see the look on his face?

Tirmek - Absolutely priceless.

Doog II - I thought he was on the red side?

Tirmek - No he's just a little banshee happy.
urial angel of death

01-27-07, 04:06 PM		OOC: Sorry about my timing. If this messes up your storyline Kaizer, just assume it happened earlier.

IC: Lisa and Gregory are leaving the paladin graduation ceremony.

Gregory: *pointing at the only head paladin not wearing fullplate* Um, Teacher who is he? For some he looks very angery.

Lisa: Oh, he's head inquisitioner Giovanni. Don't worry as long as you look human and stay by me he shouldn't be a problem.

Gregory: All right.

OOC: To be continued, dun, dun, dun... *hits Devon*

IC: Way far future.

Everything feezes; the bullet zooming toward Micheal, the screaming people coming from the back cars, everything... Well almost everything.

Izzy: Well you want an explaination, do you? Micheal and Lisa are part of rival secret societies, the Free Masons and the Vatican's secret departments respectively. They would both be valuable companions to have on our journey. Only one is needed but having both would be a great asset. However an endbringer in the car behind us has summoned a Shoggoth that is tearing through the passengers. Solving one problem would probably leave you no time to fix the other one.

Satnak: But you can freeze time. Should we be able to do both then?

Izzy: No, I can only isolate us from the time stream not actually stop time. That was my master's talent. Once we join the time stream again you will have to decide, do you save the innocents or follow the mission.
rampant

01-27-07, 05:13 PM		Satnak - Hmmmmm... you take care of the duel dimwits.

Izzy - Huh?

Satnak - You need them, I don't.

Izzy - The mission!

Satnak - Is irrelevant until I know whats actually going on.

Izzy - If I refuse to intervene?

Satnak - As I said, not my problem. Besides logic says that the one who wins is the one you need more.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-27-07, 07:02 PM		OOC: Sorry about the extended absense. I've been a bit busy as well as stuck for inspiriation. This should make up for it a little.

IC:

General Rose: Ms. Marish, take a letter.

Marish: Yes, Señor Galan.

Rose: Don't call me Señor! I am not a Thranish person. You may call me Mr. Galan, or General Galan, or Zella Galan if I'm dressed as my wife, but never Señor.

Marish: Sorry.

Rose: I've never even been to Thrane.

Marish: We're there right now.

Rose: That's still not grounds for calling me Señor! Or Don Beeg-les for that matter. Right, Dear Torlan Mroranon...

Marish: Of the Mror Holds, is that?

Rose: Just put down what I say.

Marish: Do I put that down?

Rose: Of course you don't put that down.

Marish : Well what about that?

Rose: Look. *she types* Don't put that down. Just put down - wait a mo- wait a- *picks up a pair of antlers and puts them on* Now, when I've got these antlers on I am dictating, and when I take them off *does so* I am not dictating.

Marish: *typing* I...am...not...dic...tating...

Rose: What? *puts them back on* Read that back.

Marish: Dear Torlan Mroranon. I am not dictating. What?

Rose: No, no, no, you loopy brothel inmate!

Marish: *gets up and sits on top of the desk* I've had enough of this. I am not a courtesan. *crosses her legs provocatively*

Rose: Oh, oh, 'courtesan', oh aren't we grand. Harlot's not good enough for us eh? Paramour, concubine, fille de joie. That's what we are not. Well listen to me my fine feline, you are a bit of tail, that's what you are.

Marish: I am not, you demented fictional character!

Rose: Hoybee says you are. He says you're no better than you should be.

Marish: And how would he know?

Rose: And just what do you mean by that? Are you calling my old fictional comrade-in-arms a fairy?

Marish: Fairy! Poof's not good enough for Hoybee, is it? He's got to be a bleedin' fairy. Mincing old TAF (Thranish Air Force) queen.

Rose: *shakes the crystal ball* Hoybee, I have to see you.

Hoybee: Right ho. *enters* What ho everyone?

Rose: Are you a poof?

Hoybee: *happily* I should bally well say so, old fruit.

Rose: Ugh! *shoots him* Dear Torlan Mroranon...oh... *takes the antlers off* Dear Torlan Mroranon. *Marish types* Just a line to thank you for the eels. Zella thought they were really scrummy, comma, so did I full stop. I've just heard that Hoybee was a poof, exclamation mark. What would Captain W. E. Johns have said, question mark. Sorry to mench, but if you've finished with the lawn-edger could you pop it in the post. Love Rose, Hoybee deceased and Cabin Boy. *puts antlers back on* *shakes crystal ball* Cabin Boy?

Cabin Boy: Hello, sweetie.

Rose: I have to see you.

The door opens, and Cabin Boy enters as a terrible poof in camp flying gear, sequins, eye make-up, silver stars on his cheeks.

Cabin Boy: Yes, Rose?

Rose: Are you a poof?

Cabin Boy: *camp outrage* I should certainly say not!

Rose: Thank the Traveler for that. Good lad. *Cabin Boy exits* Stout fellow, salt of the earth, backbone of Khorvaire. Funny...he looks like a poof. *takes off the antlers* Dear Regent Moranna.

*pantomime Regent Moranna enters from cupboard*

Moranna: Hello.

Rose: Get back in the cupboard you pantomimetic royal person! *she does so*

*quick cut to Volrath*

Volrath: Lemon curry?

*cut back to Rose*

Rose: Dear real Regent Moranna, thank you for the eels, full stop. They were absolutely delicious and unmistakably regal, full stop. Sorry to mench but if you've finished with the hairdryer could you pop it in the post. Yours fictionally Rose. Oh, PS see you at the Saxe-Coburgs' canasta evening. *puts the antlers on* That should puzzle her.

Marish: *sexily* Sí, Señor Rose.

Rose: Silence, naughty lady of the night!
urial angel of death

01-27-07, 07:49 PM		Izzy: Excellent skills of deduction, my young friend.

Everything suddenly begins moving again. Izzy makes a quick motion toward the bullet and it is shreaded by tiny blades of force.

Micheal: Hey I was supposed to shoot first!

Lisa: Not until the remake.

They both jump up and pull out ornate swords.

Izzy: While normally love to see two fanatics kill each other; you're both needed.

Blades of force cut down a baggage compartment over Micheal's head. It then falls down knocking him out. Lisa is fairing no better with a cloud of void around her, depriving her of air just long enough to cause unconsiousness.
rampant

01-27-07, 08:56 PM		Shoggoth - :OMG!

SPLAT!

Izzy - MY CAR!

Satnak - :D
urial angel of death

01-27-07, 09:24 PM		OOC: It isn't his car it's a subway car.

Izzy: Impressive, but a shoggoth can't be beat that easily.

endbringer... um I don't have a name for him. Let's call him Steve Steve's a nice name. Endbringer Steve looks very ****** that his abomination was wounded so casually.

Steve: Get back in there! *pulls out incense* Ia Ia Cthulhu fhtagn!

A star spawn quickly warps into existance and merges with the shoggoth, making a vaguely octopiod gooey shape.
DungeonJman

01-27-07, 09:53 PM		Pfft. Just because the Cardinals hired an entire army of gnolls isn't a reason to panic. I just beat them all in 5 minutes.

Lilly: Really? How?

With these. *pulls out the Ying and Yang Yo Yo's*

Lilly: With a pair of Yo Yo's?!?!?!

Hey, they're not normal yo-yos! I had to let them out anyway because it's against the E.B.N.E. codes to do something useful to help you guys, but for that, i'm letting them out a couple of miles closer than they would otherwise be!

Lilly: *groan*
rampant

01-27-07, 10:05 PM		Satnak - Good thing I used the distraction to get this

Ch-Chik

Chik-Foom

Chik-foom

Chik-foom

Satnak proceeds to casually pump enough lead into the beast that even if the creature is somehow immortal or some such non-sense that it will have too many bullets imbedded in it to move.
urial angel of death

01-27-07, 10:10 PM		Izzy: Nice work, but there is an easier way.

Izzy pulls out a gun and shoots the endbringer.
rampant

01-27-07, 10:54 PM		Satnak - I thought we wanted him for questioning?

Lisa - What in creation is this?!

Micheal - Who's the scary lady with the boomstick?
rampant

01-28-07, 02:08 AM		Tirmek - Sigh this is gonna take all day.

Lily - I'll be happy to take over-

Tirmek - I am suddenly more enthusiastic about my job.

Tirmek proceeds to snipe another gnoll commander off at 10x zoom.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-28-07, 10:58 AM		Femail paladin "Whats wrong Chanse? You look upset."

Chanse "Its nothing realy, Caralot made me a Fishcat but its ran away."

Femail paladin "You dont mean?"

Chanse "Yes im afariad that-" *Breaks into this song http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/29099539/ *
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-28-07, 11:25 AM		Chanse "Its nothing realy, Caralot made me a Fishcat but its ran away."
Silver: Oh for—HERE! (creates a cute puppy and drops it in Chase's lap)

Cute Puppy: *charm female* :bigeyes:

Female Paladin: What a cute puppy! Awww, what a sweet, sensitive guy you must be because you have a cute puppy who'd love you even if you were the world's cruelest individual. *snuggle*

Cute Puppy: (ihh (in obviously grown-up voice) Damn it! Why can't I get some? :mad: I'm the frickin' cute one over here!)
Endless_Helix

01-28-07, 03:58 PM		Lisa & Terra's Cabin

Ishmael Jr. is sitting a fairly generic living room, on a fairly worn couch that has endured several lycanthropic babies' teething phases. He is currently hunched over defensively. His eyes dart as though he's a corned rabbit; in some senses he is. He did (in his mind) P.O. one of the Ubers.

Ishmael Jr.: (ihh.) This is the end. I am a walking corpse. Terra is going to rip out my spine and use it to strangle me. Oh Dol Arrah... I'm going to get cheesed.(/ihh)

Terra: Hey, I was just making dinner; what do you want?

Ishmael Jr.: Anything's good, ma'a... errr... Mrs. Branford.

Terra::detect: Are you alright?

Ishmael Jr.: Yes! Yes... I'm fine! I swear!

Terra: :rolleyes: Okay...

Ishmael Jr.: (ihh.) It's like how the predators go for the sick animals... she can sense fear...(/ihh)

Terra:(ihh.) Maybe he's just hungry?(/ihh.) Are you hungry, uh... your name?

Ishmael Jr.: Ahh... Bob. *Stomach Rumbles* No, I'm fine right now, ma'a... Mrs. Branford.

Lisa: Hey! It's the redshirt from before! What can I do for ya!

Terra: Honey, can I talk to you for a second?

Lisa: Uh, sure? Okay, uh, can you wait there for a second Mr. Redshirt?

Ishmael Jr. :ghosted:

Terra: Apparently so. Actually, that's what I wanted to talk to you about. Something's up with this guy; he lied to me twice, once about his name and once about being hungry. It sounded like he hadn't eaten in days. Maybe a week, even. And he spent a while picking his fake name.

Lisa: Well, he is a redshirt. You are a god. What did you expect?

Terra: Why the hell would he know that I'm a god? Have you been spreading it around again?

Lisa: Actually, I think he was around for your ascension. I think he got aboard a little after you did. He's been around for a while, that's for certain.

Terra: That's not possible for a redshirt to alive for that long. He's probably just a clone, or pulled from an alternate dimension or something stupid like that. What I don't understand is why he'd hide his name from me. Given the circumstances, his name would make him less likely to die.

Lisa: Terra, darling, I think you're reading into this way too much. Whatever his motivations, he needs help. I thought you were through your cynicism. I mean, I did hear what happened on the doorstep; you frightened the life out of him!

Terra: :blush: Yeah, I probably shouldn't have done that.

Lisa: :) He'll be fine. Assuming he's telling the truth, he's seen a lot worse.
DungeonJman

01-28-07, 04:14 PM		*is looking at the wiki, in scroll form, before throwing it into a portal*

You know, sometimes i think that you guys are a little too powerful.

Rose: What do you mean?

DungeonJ: Well, barring you, about the entire upper echelons of the crew, and some of the kids could be hit by a Bigby's Crushing Tactical Nuke and survive. About half of them could then throw the offending person into a mountain or drive them off the deep end.

Rose: Oh, you just had to exclude me, didnt you?

DungeonJ: Well, sorry if you're offended because you don't have the power to blow up the Army of Karnnath in one hit, but it shouldn't even be humanly/haf-elfly/elfly/kalashtarly/insert race or combination of races and templates of your choice here possible. Unless you have about 15 templates in there or something.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-28-07, 05:23 PM		Bunny: "Everyone is invincible until they're vinced."
Lord Kale Fangblade

01-28-07, 05:41 PM		DungeonJ: Well, barring you, about the entire upper echelons of the crew, and some of the kids could be hit by a Bigby's Crushing Tactical Nuke and survive. About half of them could then throw the offending person into a mountain or drive them off the deep end.

Well we have killed several gods, destroyed the Demon wastes, attacked Dal Qour, taken out the C'tan, opened portals between realitys, almost killed eliminster and made pun pun cry. i'd say thats quite a bit of experience.
DungeonJman

01-28-07, 05:45 PM		I'm not discrediting that, i'm just saying that it's a little weird that the Forgotten Freedom is powerful enough that they could blow the world up on a bad day.

And you still haven't done anything to a Bruce Lee incarnation of Jarlot. (not counting Bruce Ki or whoever that is)
rampant

01-28-07, 06:02 PM		OOC: thats because we didn't want to confuse the batman jokes
Kaizer_Ryu

01-28-07, 06:04 PM		OOC: This isn't just directed at you DungeonJman. If it was anyone else, they'd get the same treatment. ;)

IC:

Rose: Who needs power?

DungeonJ: That's your pro- wait, what?

Rose: I've gotten by pretty well without it. Why would I need it now?

DungeonJ: Um...for defending yourself and others?

Rose: They can do that pretty well on their own. Unless, of course, it's a plot device. Me, I'm perfectly comfortable with my Bardliness.

DungeonJ: Fat load of good that gets you, Spoony.

Rose: *Diplomacy*

DungeonJ: Excellent point, Captain.

Rose: *Bluff*

DungeonJ: That does make sense.

Rose: *Bluff* *Natural 20*

DungeonJ: Oh, why didn't I see it before?! My life has been wasted!

Rose: *Bluff* *Natural 20 #2*

DungeonJ: These marital skills give my life no meaning! What better pursuit than the life of a Bard? Traveling the world and bringing love and happiness to all?

Rose: (i.h.h. Come on!) *Bluff* *fails DC*

DungeonJ: But without the warriors, the roads are not safe for the humble Bard.

Rose: :tantrum: DAMMIT!

DungeonJ: Thank you, Rose. You have opened my eyes to not only the value of your Class but helped me to see that my own is a noble pursuit all over again.

Rose: Uh... :shifty: ...no problem...

OOKaizer: And thus we see the value of the Bard. Now, are there any questions?

Deis: Where does the other sock always go?

Nina: Why are people so mean to each other?

Momo: What is the fundamental nature of existance?

Scias: *holds up a sign* If the Progenitors created the world, who created the Progenitors?

OOKaizer: :doh:
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-28-07, 06:05 PM		……almost killed eliminster……
OOcat: Almost being the opperative word.

Elminster (crawling out of where he landed from last time): I can never die.

OOcat: That just means Bunny isn't trying hard enough.

Bunny: *revs chainsaw*

Elminster: *whimper*
I'm not discrediting that, i'm just saying that it's a little weird that the Forgotten Freedom is powerful enough that they could blow the world up on a bad day.
OOC: One of the main themes of the FF is that we have lots of people who are both very powerful and decidedly unsqueaky, yet all they do is torment a few people and blow up Sharn. "With great power comes the great realization that you can have just as much fun annoying each other."
Kaizer_Ryu

01-28-07, 06:13 PM		"With great power comes the great realization that you can have just as much fun annoying each other."
OOC: That is going in my sig. :D
urial angel of death

01-28-07, 06:24 PM		Deis: Where does the other sock always go?

Volrath: Uncle Shoggy realized long ago that "With great power comes the great realization that you can have just as much fun annoying each other." So he uses his infinite powers over time to confound you mortals.

Nina: Why are people so mean to each other?

Volrath: Because you are a flawwed creation.

Momo: What is the fundamental nature of existance?

Volrath: It's all one big message board thread.

Scias: *holds up a sign* If the Progenitors created the world, who created the Progenitors?

Volrath: Keith Baker, the Infernal Bovine.
DungeonJman

01-28-07, 06:26 PM		Evil DungeonJ: *still stuck in the energy ball* Stop doing that!

Rose: Why?

Evil DungeonJ: Two reasons: One, it's supposed to be my job to mess with his mind.

Rose: Meh.

Evil DungeonJ: Two, if you alter his head too much, then his subconcious is going to review over itself to get the facts straight.

Rose: So?

Evil DungeonJ: *angrily, while banging on the side of the sphere for emphasis* I'M STILL IN HERE! So if his mind realizes that the evil side of his personality is no longer there, then.... *shudders*. Be glad that I can't blow something on the ship up to let off steam as long as i'm in this thing.

Rose: So, you also contain his essence for lording over people as a GM?
urial angel of death

01-28-07, 06:38 PM		In Mickey's clinic P/Y/R has given birth to another child. It was born wearing an orange parka and a look of utter horror on its face.

Butters: Yay I have a little brother!

Vladamire: *pulling out knife and fork* Yes a little brother. *licks lips*

Lenneth: *pulls out enormous hammer* You stop that now!

Myrr: Is the fighting really necissary!

both: Yes! *begin swordfight*

Myrr: Okay. :(

Aerith: See little Stewie he's your baby brother.

Stewie: *looking at baby* For every diaper of yours I have to change I will kill you.

P/Y/R: Honey I've named all the others. Why don't you name him.

Volrath: Alright, he's Kenny.

Kenny: Mmmmmrrrr!

As soon as his name was uttered Kenny spontaneously combusted.

Myrr: *pointing at OOUrial* Oh my god you killed Kenny!

Lenneth: *pausing mid fight* You bastard!
cypher_zero

01-28-07, 11:41 PM		OOC: Hey all, I'm starting up a new campaign and was wondering if anyone here was interested. We use Yahoo msg for voicechat and openRPG to play on. It's gonna be a 4th level ghestalt ebberon campaign. Pm or MSG me if you're interested.
.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-29-07, 09:15 AM		OOC: That is going in my sig. :D
OOC: Ultimately thank Terry Pratchett. He didn't say it, but he implied it.
Darakhoranon

01-29-07, 09:23 AM		Even Terry Pratchett wouldn´t be able to create anything even half as crazy as this thread...
urial angel of death

01-29-07, 06:34 PM		OOC: Will finish Gregory plot-line soon.

IC: way far future

Micheal and Lisa wake up inside a dark room. They are both tied to neighboring chairs.

Lisa: Where are we?

Micheal: Be damned if I know.

Lisa: Yes, yes you are.

Micheal: Oh shut up!

Lisa: What are you gonna do? Glare at me.

Micheal: *spits*

Lisa: Oh real mature.

Micheal: You just wish you had thought of it first.

Lisa wiggles her chair over to Micheal

Micheal: What?

Lisa: *bites*

Micheal: Ahh! You bit me!
------------
Present

Nalfien: Kerrith status report.

Kerrith: The neo-kythons are coming along nicely. They have already developed a society on par with the Eldeen Reaches, and more brutal than Karrnath.

Nalfien: How is that possible?

Kerrith: Well they rose above animal intelligence and there they were.

Nalfien: No no I mean the Karrnath part. They kill deserters and raise them as undead servants.

Kerrith: The neo-kythons eat the weak, leaving vital parts til last.

Nalfien: Ah.

Kerrith: Master don't you think playing god with a species might have dreadful consequences.

Nalfien: Nonsense, what could have put such a rediculous idea in your head?

Kerrith: I don't know. It's just a feeling.

OOUrial pushes his copies of Aliens, Starcraft, Jurassic Park, Terminator, and his Sliver deck out of view.

Nalfien: Besides there is no problem that can't be solved with fire.

Kerrith: Aren't we creating a neo-kython that is immune to fire.

Nalfien: And...?

Kerrith: And it's a neo-kython meaning that all other neo-kythons around it gain its ability.

Nalfien: I don't follow.

Kerrith: That means they won't be hurt by fire.

Nalfien: So?

Kerrith: Then the problem of them revolting can't be solved by fire.

Nalfien: Now, now Kerrith weren't you listening before? Every problem can be solved with fire. Apprentices really need to listen to their master you know.

Kerrith: *face palm* Fine I'll get to feeding them.

Kerrith pulls a lever by the neo-kython pin releasing hundreds of sheep which they hungrily devour. Intermixed with the flock is Kenny.

Kerrith: Oh my god there's a kid in there! Wait... it's a human. Thank goodness I was really worried there for a second.

Kenny: Mmmrrr! *splat*
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

01-29-07, 07:02 PM		Ash "Oh oh! Do entierly non flame related Save or die effects still work?"

Chanse "You are such a kid sometimes.

Ash "Egg, and thats better than you'll ever be."

Chanse "Oh?"

Ash "Eggs get laid." (note to children, all he means is that sleeping under a Chicken is warm and cozy)
(Note to Parents of Above children. What the :censored:ing hell is :censored:ing wrong with you people you :censored:ing stupid :censored:s leting children read a :censored:ing thread like this?)
rampant

01-30-07, 01:27 AM		Momo - Wheeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Teiza - :evillaugh:

Momo and Teiza are riding what appears to be one of the mecha-fiend wolves, only bigger, and with several midnight crystals studding its form.
Darakhoranon

01-30-07, 03:22 AM		Ash "Oh oh! Do entierly non flame related Save or die effects still work?"

Chanse "You are such a kid sometimes.

Ash "Egg, and thats better than you'll ever be."

Chanse "Oh?"

Ash "Eggs get laid." (note to children, all he means is that sleeping under a Chicken is warm and cozy)
(Note to Parents of Above children. What the :censored:ing hell is :censored:ing wrong with you people you :censored:ing stupid :censored:s leting children read a :censored:ing thread like this?)

Aurixirthos:
As if you were really surprised...
After all, you even creep out the Daelkyr and no Quori will even come NEAR your dreams!
So if a human learns about the Forgotten Freedom and the "crew", sanity and logical reasoning go out the window...
rampant

01-30-07, 09:33 PM		Fluffy - Meow? (where is everyone?)
luna18moon

01-30-07, 09:50 PM		Slaypaw: Who knows?
OOC: I've been really busy lately, so I haven't been able to post.
Kaizer_Ryu

01-30-07, 11:36 PM		Quistis: Honestly, there's a war going on! Where are they?

Sarah: I really don't think you want to know.

-----

Terra: You are the elite. The best of the best. You have excelled far beyond your peers and have proven yourselves worthy of this mission.

Lisa: It will not be pleasant, but it may end this war with minimal casualties. Though you are skilled warriors, your 'special' talents are needed here.

Female Paladin Squad Leader: What is our mission, my Queens?

Terra: *ahem* You are to..."befriend" the Dukes. Many, many times.

Female Paladins: *GASP*

Lisa: I told you it would not be pleasant. With their leaders effectively neutralized, their forces should fall apart.

F. P. S. L.: What about our vows to uphold truth and justice?

Lisa: This serves the greater good. If they ask your purpose, tell them the truth. That you are there to distract them.

Terra: That will, in effect, force them into your clutches. As men who want power but do not deserve it, they cannot ignore an obvious challenge and even more obvious trap if it threatens their masculinity. Just look at your "Dumb Bad-guys Brought Down By the Hero's Girlfriend/Wife When They Thought They Could Seduce Them to Their Evil Ways" manual. All the catch phrases are in there.

F. P. S. L.: Why do I feel confused by the fact that the truth is being used for subterfuge?

Lisa: That'll go away once you accept that the truths people don't want to hear are often willfully ignored.

-----

Lilly: (i.h.h.) I always wondered if this'd work...

Elina: *kicking her leg as Lilly scratches behind her ear* :cloud9:

-----

Teiza: Ready?

Momo: Transform!

*Transformers(tm) sound effect*

Momo: Meet Optimal Primer!

Ketler: HEY!

Teiza: :P You're just jealous 'cause yours can only turn into a gun.

Ketler: :weep: Shut up! At least it's better than Liam's! :weep:

Liam: Why, oh WHY does it always turn into a Cassette Tape?! :weep: I don't even know what a Cassette Tape is!
rampant

01-31-07, 02:12 AM		OORampant - :bored: ... Ok, time to pull another squirrel out of my hat.

13 - Shouldn't that be rabbit?

OORampant - You couldn't pay me to stick my hand in that hat.

Bunny (from inside the hat) - :censored:
------------------------------------------------

Rose - Pack the parkas we're going skiing!

Jarlot - Isn't there a war on?

Rose - Who cares?
Darakhoranon

01-31-07, 09:35 AM		Aurixirthos:
The people you´re going to use as "obstacles" might be slightly interested...
rampant

01-31-07, 12:19 PM		Lily - Strike!

Blue team - Haaaaaaaaah!
------------------------------------

Ishmeal .... what number are we on? - We've been ambushed!

Red team - AHHHHHH! the round coldness.
Charles Phipps

01-31-07, 04:00 PM		Red Shirt vs. Blue Shirt

Day 5

Blue Base

Lilly: Okay, gentlement, it's time for our final attack on the enemy.

Tirmek: Oh God, you're going to give a Speech.

*A Flag of Thrane drops behind Lilly*

Lilly: I want you to remember that no Paladin ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor, dumb Orc die for his country.

Doog II: Doog no like Hate Speech!

Lilly: Men, all this stuff you've heard about Thrane not wanting to fight, wanting to stay out of the war is a lot of horse dung. Thranish, traditionally, love to fight. All real Thranes love the sting of battle.

Tirmek: You're just stealing the speech from the movie Patton!

Lilly: When you were kids you all admired the champion marble shooter, the fastest runner, big league ball player, the toughest boxer. Thranes love a winner and will not tolerate a loser. Thranes play to win all the time. I wouldn't give a hoot in hell for a man who lost and laughed. That's why Thranes have never lost and will never lose a war, because the very thought of losing is hateful to Thranes!

Tirmek: That ignores the Last War and all military logic!

Lilly: Now, an army is a team. It lives, eats, sleeps, fights as a team. This individuality stuff is a bunch of crazzap. The bilious bastards who wrote that stuff about individuality for the Korranberg Chronicler don't know anything more about real battle than they do about fornicating.

Lilly's Army of 200 that lie just off camera: WE'RE ALL INDIVIDUALS!

Doog II: *sniffle* *weak voice against the crowd* I'm not.

Lilly: Now, we have the finest food, equipment, the best spirit, and the best men in the world. You know, by Dol ArrahI, I actually pity those poor bastards we're going up against, by Dol Arrah, I do. We're not just going to shoot the bastarves; we're going to cut out their living guts and use them to grease the treads of our warforged. We're going to murder those lousy Valenar bastarves by the bushel.

Tirmek: First, Warforged don't have treds. Second, WHEN THE HELL DID WE START FIGHTING ELVES!?

Lilly: Now, some of you boys, I know, are wondering whether or not you'll chicken out under fire. Don't worry about it. I can assure you that you will all do your duty.

Doog II: Even Robot Chicken?

Robot Chicken: Buck Buck Buck.

Lilly: The Reds are the enemy. Wade into them. Spill their blood. Shoot them in the belly. When you put your hand into a bunch of goo that a moment before was your best friend's face, you'll know what to do.

Tirmek: I don't like anyone here so I'm quite confused with these orders.

Doog II: DOOG NO WANT LOSE HIS PUPPY!

Tirmek: That's not a puppy! That's an otagual!

Lilly: Now there's another thing I want you to remember: I don't want to get any messages saying that we are holding our position. We're not holding anything. Let the damned Dwarves do that....

Tirmek: We're not fighting Dwarves!

Lilly: We are advancing constantly and we're not interested in holding onto anything except the enemy. We're going to hold onto him by the nose and we're going to kick him in the anyx. We're going to kick the hell out of him all the time and we're going to go through him like crazzap through a Rakashasa's behind.

Tirmek: Your metaphors are now starting to scare me.

Lilly: Now, there's one thing that you men will be able to say when you get back home. And you may thank the Host for it. Thirty years from now when you’re sitting around your fireside with your grandson on your knee, and he asks you: "What did you do in the great Thranish Civil War?" You won't have to say, "Well, I shoveled shavit in Q'Barra."

Doog II: What Doog's mission?

Lilly: Latrine duty....in Q'Barra,

Doog II: :sniffle:

Lilly: Alright, now you sons-of-witches, you know how I feel. Oh... I will be proud to lead you wonderful guys into battle anytime, anywhere.

Tirmek: By the way, 10,000 Gnolls are going to be advancing on our position within twenty minutes.

Lilly: Where's that freelancer?

Sarah: YO!

Tirmek: Oh hell no.
rampant

01-31-07, 04:50 PM		Tirmek - I say we leave right and go get lunch. I refuse to follow this moron into battle.

Ivy - blah blah blah blah blaaaah
Lord Kale Fangblade

01-31-07, 05:44 PM		OOC: reason for my absence, writers block. that and i've had a lot of coursework recently.

IC:


We're going to murder those lousy Valenar bastarves by the bushel.


Sithis gets up from watching the crystal ball and picks up his Valenar doublebladed scimitar. he checks the balance, inspects both the blades for a moment before walking towards the door, whisteling an old Valenar war tune.
rampant

01-31-07, 05:52 PM		Lily - Where did the quarter master go?

Doog II - He's behind the tank, making out with the morale officer.

Lily - :doh: Why is everyone getting more action than me?

Izzy - You're kidding right?

Kerrith - At least you get to be around a girl.

Maladren - Whiner.


Off in the distance.

Tirmek - oooooh

Sarah - I thought you'd like that. Scritchy scritchy:D

Tirmek - :cloud9: Just a little to the right, up a little higher, behind the ear.


Scene shifts back

Lily - Hate Tirmek!

Maladren - Hate Sarah!

---------------------------------------------------

Ketty - Too slow!

Feal'thas - That's what you think.

*clink * Clank * Spark * Spining *
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-31-07, 06:12 PM		Lily - Hate Tirmek!

Maladren - Hate Sarah!
Silver: Are you thinking what I'm thinking? :devil:

Bunny: I hope not.
Lord Kale Fangblade

01-31-07, 06:16 PM		Feal-thas lunged, she dodjed to the right, He brought his sheild up against her return blow.
A lance of pain went down his fractured left arm. Feal-Thas ignored it, she didnt know about the fracture yet, the only reason he could move it was because of the special construct harness he'd got from ketler.
No one but Tara and Naz'roth knew about the wound, though they'd kept him from training and sparring untill it had healed properly. it was practicaly driving him mad, being couped up all day.
he'd needed some fresh air, and Ketty had offered him a chance to spar with her. how could he refuse?
there was another flash of white hot pain as he brought his shield round to block another blow, he hated cursed weapons, he couldnt use magic to heal the wound so he had to wait for time to.
it would be another few days at the most thanks to his fast healing. but the thing still drove him mad.
Feal-Thas shrugged off the pain and attacked. the pain was worth it though, worth it to fight again...
urial angel of death

01-31-07, 06:28 PM		Kerrith: Hate Lilly!
------------

Gregory walked into his dorm room at the Tranish paladin's academy. He was gland that the ceremony had passed without incedent, and that soon both he and his master would be safe aboard the Forgotten Freedom. Admittedly an oxmoron, but what the hay. Gregory paused when he saw an inky black spot forming in the air. It grows from being barely noticebly until it fills his entire field of vision. Out of it steps Volrath.

Volrath: Well done Gyrr'gorie!

Gregory: Master why are you here?!

Volrath: Because our plans have been set into full motion. Soon the festering sore on Eberron's surface known as Thrane will be gone!

Gregory: Master, Terra and Lisa will defeat the Dukes and Thrane will be reformed.

Volrath: Reformed :mad: Reformed! You know as well as I do that no system can be reformed! When ever revolutions come claiming that they will reform a country, in inevitably fails. As soon as the armies leave and the war cries can't be heard the government goes back to the way it was before. Or even worse those revolting turn out to be just as bad if not worse than their oppressors! The only way to truely change something is to start over from scratch. You have to kill those who are the problem. You have to kill them, kill their families, kill their children, and destroy everything that they embodied!

Gregory: People can change for the better.

Volrath: Oh shut up! You are full of it! How were changes of leadership made in your home town?!

Gregory: When the leader is weak his successors kill him. :(

Volrath: Exactly! You are living proof that people can't change. Have you even once considered telling Lisa who you really are.

Gregory: ...

Volrath: I thought so!

Gregory: Master I-

Gregory noticed a change in his master's eyes. They instantly narrowed and became full of fear. Volrath grabbed him by the head and held Gregory in front of himself. Dozens of blades ripped through Gregory's body and silver blood spilled everywhere. Gregory felt very lip as his master cast him aside and Gregory reverted to his true form; that of a green humaniod completely devoid of identifying features.

OOC: Will finish up the rest soon.
urial angel of death

01-31-07, 06:52 PM		As Gregory's body crumpled to the floor. The imposing frame of chief inquesitioner Giovanni walked through the doorway, already hold two more long swords.

Volrath: Why Giovanni fancy seeing you. Still got a stick up your ass.

Giovanni: Prepare to die demon child!

Giovanni throws one of his swords into Volrath's shoulder and out the other side. Oddly enough the wound doesn't instantly heal.

Volrath: That hurt! You're gonna p-

Volrath is cut short as two of more blessed longswords rip into him. This time they are in his gut. Giovanni then grabs hold of both hilts and cuts in opposite directions. Volrath, taking advantage of his foe's closeness, latches onto Giovanni's face promptly snaps his neck.

When Giovanni gets up his enemy is nowhere to be seen.

Giovanni: Where are you devil child?

Volrath jumps down from the ceiling. He lands on Giovanni's back, with he breaks with some freshly regrown legs.

Volrath: So it looks like more than one of us has learned to regenerate since our last encounter. :D
urial angel of death

01-31-07, 07:10 PM		Gregory walked into his dorm room at the Tranish paladin's academy. He was gland that the ceremony had passed without incedent, and that soon both he and his master would be safe aboard the Forgotten Freedom.

So of course now is when the **** hits the fan.

Gregory paused when he saw an inky black spot forming in the air. It grows from being barely noticebly until it fills his entire field of vision. Out of it steps Volrath.

A yes Doctor Who special effects where would we be without you?

Volrath: Well done Gyrr'gorie!

Isn't it wierd how some many Mythos looking names are actually pronouced eirily similar to normal ones. Isn't that right Mrr'grt.

Mrr'grt: Stop making fun of me!

Gregory: Master, Terra and Lisa will defeat the Dukes and Thrane will be reformed.

Into a series of strip malls and apartment building becuase their parents didn't can there own food.

Volrath: Reformed :mad: Reformed! You know as well as I do that no system can be reformed! When ever revolutions come claiming that they will reform a country, in inevitably fails. As soon as the armies leave and the war cries can't be heard the government goes back to the way it was before. Or even worse those revolting turn out to be just as bad if not worse than their oppressors! The only way to truely change something is to start over from scratch. You have to kill those who are the problem. You have to kill them, kill their families, kill their children, and destroy everything that they embodied!

Disclaimer: The views expressed by FF crew members are their's and their's alone. They are not held by the Entities From Beyond Non-Existance or their parent company Wizrds of the Coast.

Gregory: People can change for the better.

Like Vader did... kinda.

Volrath: Exactly! You are living proof that people can't change. Have you even once considered telling Lisa who you really are.

Or that you're carrying Momo's baby. *gasp*

Gregory noticed a change in his master's eyes. They instantly narrowed and became full of fear. Volrath grabbed him by the head and held Gregory in front of himself.

Danger Will Robinson! Danger!

Dozens of blades ripped through Gregory's body and silver blood spilled everywhere.

Imagine Robocop, but bloddier and less touchy feely.

Need more time to finish.
rampant

01-31-07, 07:35 PM		Tara - Feal'thas stop that this instant! You know your sheild arm is still damaged.

Ketty - *eyes narrow*

Feal'thas - Oh :censored:

Tara - Whatch that mouth young man!

Ketty zeroes in on Feal'thas's sheild arm and begins pounding on it. Both Blades singing and clanging off the shield in a river of shining metal.

Tara - What are you doing!?

Ketty - You should have kept your mouth shut, his real enemies will use that info, so will I.

Feal'thas - (i.h.h. ow what a :censored: ow :censored: ow, she's ow right though ow)
Charles Phipps

01-31-07, 09:20 PM		Red Shirt vs. Blue Shirt

1st Brelish Gnoll Infantry Unit Ranks

*A vast number of Gnolls in Red coats and black hats appear*

Gnoll Commander: I say Old Chum, can you believe that we're at last going to visit Thrane.

Gnoll Captain: *adjusts his monacle* Yes, a fine day for a ride. On his Majesty's Service and all that.

Gnoll Private: Too Right. Err officers, what exactly are we going to do be doing over with the Thrannies?

Gnoll Commander: We'll we've heard that there's going to be a good bit of civil strife here amongst these folk and it's our job to keep the peace. For King and Country and all that.

Gnoll Captain: Jolly good. Jolly good.

Gnoll Commander: We're going to be taking residence in an uninhabited box canyon.

Gnoll Captain: I say, doesn't that strike you as a rather curious place to take up residence?

Gnoll Commander: Well they don't want us to appear like we're going to be threatening the average citizen.

Gnoll Private: Those bloody gits in Parliament always come up with crazy plans.

Gnoll Commander: Watch your tongue boy we've....

*Is hit in the head with a fireball*

Gnoll Captain: GAH! NATIVES! Bring forth the Bugbear Highlanders!

*A group of kilt wearing bugbears charge forth with claymores while covered in woad*

Gnoll Private: Ummmm sir, won't they get slaughtered.

Gnoll Captain: Probably but that's what the Scotch swillers are for after all. Tea time?

*sounds of fireballs hitting the bugbear ranks*

Gnoll Private: Don't mind if I do sir.

***

Red Base

*The Reds stand over the edge of their base using fireballs*

Sergeant Jarlot: So this is how it ends. Us against the masses of those filthy Blue Bastarves.

Griff: Sir, I'm no master of military tactics, but aren't they wearing red shirts?

Sergeant Jarlot: That's just to fool us. They're tricky devils those Blues.

Simmons: I'm glad we've got these thirty or so Wands of Fireballs

Sergeant Jarlot: Where did you get these Griff anyway?

Griff: Oh, I used your Mastercard and paid 10 bucks a piece for them on D&D online. Since it takes place in Xen'drick, technically anything I purchase there is canon for Eberron.

Sergeant Jarlot: My masterca.....frig dang blast!

Simmon: Doesn't that strike you as violating the spirit of Eberron as a low magic setting for the fact that the levels respawn.

Griff: Not my problem, I also bought an Epic mount.

Sergeant Jarlot: Remember Griff, kill Griff first then me then yourself.

Simmon: It's my pleasure sir.

Griff: You're going to surrender after you kill us aren't you?

Simmon: I like to think that his death will make the highest ranking officer.

Ishmael III: Ummm...about the armor you put me in.

Sergeant Jarlot: In this man's army, we've all got to make sacrifices Ishmael.

Ishmael III: It's pink. Frigging pink.

Sergeant Jarlot: Knowing what we do of your dads, we hope they'll mistake you for a girl and in your distracting of them with your favors....we may be able to make our escape.

Ishmael III: I didn't agree to that!

Sergeant Jarlot: You don't have to son. You don't have to.

***

Blue Base

Lilly: Well my plan is working out pretty well.

*Bugbear Highlander bursts through the door*

*Is stabbed in the side by Lilly*

Bugbear: F-ing Camper!

Lilly: It's a perfectly legitimate strategy.

Tirmek: *wearing a robe and fuzzy slippers* I'm sitting out this battle.

Lilly: How's Sarah doing with the enemy commander?

Tirmek: Do you know that ripping out a man's skull only does 6d8 damage?

Lilly...no.

Tirmek: She's using his skull to beat him to death.
SilvercatMoonpaw

01-31-07, 10:08 PM		Tirmek: Do you know that ripping out a man's skull only does 6d8 damage?

Lilly...no.

Tirmek: She's using his skull to beat him to death.
Bunny: It's this :censored:in' hit-point system! It absorbs too much damage :rant: per hit and doesn't take into account previously sustained injuries! This would never happen if I was in charge!

Silver: If you were in charge everything would be vorpal and have stacking keen and Improved Critical. :bored:

Bunny: So? It's this whole "war-game" mentality. Next thing you know it'll be miniatures based……
DungeonJman

01-31-07, 10:36 PM		*is pacing back and forth on the ship*

Gaaaaaaah! I can't stand it! I can't do a single thing for enjoyment, lest it messes something up...

:lighbulb

Nah, i don't have the heart for it. The evil me..., no he'd take it too far, hey Nobby!


Nobby: What now?

just use the stupid yo-yo's.

Nobby: Fine. Ying Yang Yo- Yoooooooo!

*accidently hits the barrier seal sending him, Evil DungeonJ, and the room that Volrath, Giovanni, and Gregory are in into the Ying-Yang world*

Giovanni:*looks outside at the black sky with white kana in the middle of the sky* What the...

*gets socked in the stomach by Volrath*

Volrath: It's the Forgotten Freedom, weirdness is so commonplace that it's not questioned. Nor is people's intestines being nailed to the floor in maddening ways.

Nobby: Oh this is so not fair, having to face my creator's evil side.

Evil DungeonJ: You got that right, and I like it that way. *begins zapping Nobby with a full power eldritch blast, enhanced by his evil aura, who drops both of the yo-yos while being blasted.*

*back on the ship*

Well, if anyone needs me, or they need to get out, i'm pretty sure that they can just get Nobby to use the yo-yos.

(Note: As long as they stay in the room, it doesn't matter, plus they can always just run out and grab the yo-yos. Remember that you need both to leave in "one piece")
rampant

02-01-07, 12:35 AM		Tirmek - So wanna go shopping later?

Sarah - Sure. *smack*crunch*pound*

Tirmek - You missed his left kidney. *sips orange juice*

Sarah - *smack* This would be a lot easier if gnolls had a bite attack.
----------------------------------------------------------------

Ketty - Two mistakes, fighting me while injured, and letting me know about it.

Feal'thas - Tara-

Ketty - Quickened Silence effects.
rampant

02-01-07, 02:54 AM		Ketty - (i.h.h. he's good, needs to work on the energitic side)

Feal'thas - (i.h.h. she's good, relies a little too heavily on her psionics)

Tara - :headexplo: Feal'thas back to bed this instant! Ketty stop trying to break his arm off! I don't care who your sister is!
Darakhoranon

02-01-07, 07:21 AM		Aurixirthos:
Better do as she says, Feal´Thas. NEVER argue with a... woman...

*Teleports away - just in case.*
DungeonJman

02-01-07, 09:33 AM		Well at least i have something to do now and.....

*suddenly freezes and begins staring blankly into space*
rampant

02-01-07, 12:21 PM		Chalky - :evillaugh:

OOdungeon is now green

and hanging by a rope off the side of the ship

and the rope is coated in woodpecker pheremones.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-01-07, 03:06 PM		Aurixirthos:
Better do as she says, Feal´Thas. NEVER argue with a... woman...

*Teleports away - just in case.*

Especialy if that woman is not only your aunt, but also happens to be involved with a Daemon lord. and is has a reputation for being very fast with spells...

IC:
Tara: Mass hold monster

a red corona surrounds both Ketty and and Feal-Thas, holding them in place.

Feal-Thas: (ihh) damn spell penetration.
rampant

02-01-07, 04:15 PM		Feal'thas - Thanks alot i've always wanted to be frozen with someone sticking a Sword in face.

Ketty - Don't look at me, I'm not the one using a hold.

Feal'thas - I can't turn my neck.

Ketty - Oh right.

Tara - Now that you can't go running off-

The red corona flickers for a second.

Ketty - Damn! My negations aren't strong enough...

Feal'thas - Stop that.

Tara - What did you do!

Ketty - Telekinetic thrust a needle into his midsection.

Tara - Why?

Ketty - He hasn't said to stop, and neither have I.
Slightly_Unscrewed

02-01-07, 04:17 PM		You guys are nuts. Just letting you know.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-01-07, 04:54 PM		we're not nuts. We're insane.

Ic:
Tara: Dont make me knock your heads together.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-01-07, 05:06 PM		You guys are nuts. Just letting you know.
13: Thank you for the complement.
we're not nuts. We're insane.
13: The difference being that nuts people are either charming or annoying. Insane people are to be avoided at all costs.
rampant

02-01-07, 05:51 PM		Ketty - Could you please, I'm pretty sure that would take him down.

Feal'thas - Excuse me?

Ketty - All i need is one bloody touch while you're stuck and it counts for psychic sneak attack.

Tara - Ok thats it you two. I'm officially calling this done, will you stop now Ketty?

Ketty - Fine.
DungeonJman

02-01-07, 07:59 PM		13: The difference being that nuts people are either charming or annoying. Insane people are to be avoided at all costs.

No, the difference between insane people and crazy people is that insane people appear normal on the outside while being crazy on the inside, sort of like Kanatash is. Crazy people are those who are out of tune with reality enough to not care whether they show it or not.
rampant

02-01-07, 10:19 PM		Ketty - *mutter* got it! (red corona dissapears)

Ketty - (now free) We'll try this again when your arm is better *push*

Feal'thas - ooof

Ketty - Goodbye *dimension door*

Tara - What a *****.

Feal'thas - Ah hink 'y hace mit uh hat. (I think my face hit a rat)
rampant

02-02-07, 02:30 AM		Feal'thas's quarters, geeze he's got a lot of weapons on that wall.

Corre - Ooooh a Great Cleaver imported all the way from Bas-Lag.

OORampant - You're not in this scene.

Corre - Bite my fleshy pink tail!

OORampant - Your mums would kill me.

Corre - So step off and let me look around.
------------------------------------------------------

Later, with a few pieces missing, including said Greatcleaver.

Feal'thas - Who the hell has been in my room?

OORampant - JUST DO THE SCENE!!! :rant:

13 - :D

Feal'thas - (i.h.h.) Razzafragging E.B.N.E.s .

OORampant - I heard that!

Feal'thas finds a crystal slipped into a chink in his armor.

Feal'thas - What the?

Crystal activation message - This is a link crystal model 3.6 from Stormshard Industries Inc. A link has been preset, would you like to contact?
Darakhoranon

02-02-07, 03:19 AM		Aurixirthos:
*sitting in HIS Chamber in front of a crystal ball*

This should be interesting...
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-02-07, 12:38 PM		Naz'roth sits in HIS chamber, watching Aurixirthos watching Feal-Thas.

Naz'roth: caught you. no scrying for you... *chuckles evily*

he raises a hand and initiates one of his defense protocals.
in Aurixirthos's room the crystal ball switches to a vision of a strange and familiar purple dinosaur thats singing...

***

Feal-Thas: (ihh) could be a trap, could be not a trap... paranoia or curiosity? frack it. curiosity wins. (out loud) yes.
rampant

02-02-07, 01:59 PM		Aurixirthos - MY EYES!
----------------------------------------
THe stone glimmers and an image of Ketty's face blinks in above it.

Feal-Thas - Hello.

Ketty - I know how dull being on the injured list is. This crystal can be used to play games. I know its not the same but, hey what can you do? Here's a few of my favorites, use the call function to give me a glimmer when you think you're up to a match. The controls are thought based, and mostly intuitive. Goodbye.
rampant

02-02-07, 08:39 PM		Island mall

Tirmek - Ugh! I hate running into Vedris.

Sarah - You have to admit, she's better than most of your hate club.

Tirmek - Oh yes, she's probably the nicest person to ever hate me.

Sarah - Why does she hate you? She doesn't through either side of your ancestry in your face, or your arrogance.

Tirmek - I think she's just jealous.

Sarah - Ok you're good, but even you have to admit Vedris is almost as powerful as Elina or I. If not as versatile, or tough. Plus her weapon work is just a smidge better than yours.

Tirmek - No I mean she's jealous that you chose me as your.... romantic interest.

Sarah - :confused: But the books on fey culture all said that flowers are snack food!

Tirmek - She's half-fey, and maybe she read a book or two on humanoid culture.

Sarah - Oh geeze, All this time I thought she just had high metabolism! I wonder if this is what Lily feels like all the time?
rampant

02-03-07, 01:13 AM		Feal-thas - Grrrrr I hate those sky-lancers!

Ketty - Make better use of anti-air techniques.

Feal-thas - Hard to do when they all have that Glass spirit embedded in their formation countering my magical attacks.

Ketty - Not my problem, you just lost your last squad of Windskimmers.

Feal-thas - Finally! The Vengeful Spirit Embedded in their formation takes those blasted sky-lancers down.

Ketty - Bloody Mol and the Glass spirit can'tbe activated again so soon after using it to fend off your Wind-skimmers' volley ability.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-03-07, 03:32 AM		OOC: Ok, it's official. Silver's been hanging out with the 8-bit crew WAY too much.

http://www.nuklearpower.com/daily.php?date=070203

Not to mention 13 having the time of e's life.
ratslinky

02-03-07, 07:33 AM		OORatslinky: This is sad I can't think anything to write. I thought going on holiday to Sydney would help but it hasn't :weep: . Bunny must love the 8-bit crew almost as much as the FF crew.

Gaz: Pow your dead *As he shoots Tirmek thru the head on a crystal similar to Ketty's*

Sarah: Yeah well pow your dead you shouldn't have revealed your self

Esabar: *Fires the Redeemer strait into Sarah* Oh you guys suck at this. This is the tenth time this has happened

Sarah: Aw I thought you only had the rocket

Mareth: Ooh can I join in

Gaz: Do you know how to play?

Mareth: No but I'd love to learn

Lilly: (i.h.h) Yay finally I won't be the first to die

Everyone Else: (i.h.h) Uh-oh this is going to hurt

*Five hours later*

The score reads as follows
Wins Losses
Mareth: 200 0

Esabar: 180 479

Sarah: 100 559

Gaz: 90 569

Tirmek: 89 570

Lilly: 0 659
Charles Phipps

02-03-07, 07:39 AM		Lilly: At last, we've managed to win our glorious victory over the Red army!

Tirmek: By we, you mean Sarah.

Lilly: I admit she contributed her fair share.

Tirmek: She used her Dragon Mark to raise an army of two hundred Death Knights to start slashing their way through that.

Lilly: Aren't Siberys Dragonmarks only supposed to be usable once per day?

Tirmek: Apparently no one told the Half-Angel/Half-Demon hybrid that....or that she's not an Elf and shouldn't even HAVE it.

Lilly: Speaking of which, Maladren seems pretty happy.

Tirmek: Any opportunity to kill mortals is something that pleases him.

Lilly: Oh well, we didn't even get to use the tank that Ketler built for us.

Tirmek: We don't know how to use it.

Lilly: Well I found the remote.

*picks it up and clicks it*

Tirmek: Uh....Lilly....are you sure you should be using that without certification?

Lilly: How bad could it be? I set it to Detect Evil with instructions to destroy on sight.

Tirmek: You know, as a fiend I automatically...

Tank: Auto-targetting engaged.

Tirmek: Lilly, do you mind if I use my dying breath to put this dagger in your head?

Lilly: Why yes...

*STAB*

Lilly: Ow.

Tirmek: I die content.

KABLOOM

Sarah: YOU KILLED TIRMEK YOU TEAM KILLING :censored: TARD!

Lilly: He could have survived the initial barrage of holy shells!

Tank: Continous fire activated.

KABLOOM
KABLOOM
KABLOOM
KABLOOM
KABLOOM

Lilly: Okay, yeah, he's dead.

Elina: Booo?

Lilly: Yes Elina, I have a knife stuck in my head.

Sarah: Oh Tirmek!

Elina: Bwah bah bah!

Lilly: I think I finally understand her language.

Sarah: What language!? All she does is say variants of bah!

Lilly: Maybe it's like Lefienish and how you pronounce it.

KABLOOM

Maladren: I'd ask you to tell the tank to stop shooting Tirmek's corpse but then it would target me.

Tirmek's Ghost: Lilly.

Lilly: Oh my God! I struck down Tirmek and he's become more powerful than I could possibly imagine!

Tirmek's Ghost: No, then I would do the world a favor and make sure that you were never born.

Lilly: Elina, Elina is my sister. Somehow I've known. I've always known.

Sarah: Ewww.

Tirmek's Ghost: No, cousin is creepy enough.

Maladren: Actually, that's incredibly distantly related for a Rakashasa marriage.

Tirmek's Ghost: You're not helping. No, Lilly, I'm a ghost because as a Fiend I reincarnate. Unfortunately, I'm a half fiend which means my memories are retained but I don't fully re-incorporate.

Lilly: Explain the part again after No Lilly?

Tirmek's Ghost: You're a freaking WIZARD! You should know this stuff!

Lilly: I didn't buy much in the way of Knowledge Arcana.

Tirmek's Ghost: WHO MAKES A WIZARD THAT DOESN'T HAVE KNOWLEDGE ARCANA!?

Lilly: Well how ELSE am I going to buy the cross class skill Profession: Sexy Beast?

Tirmek's Ghost: ....

Sarah: ....

Elina: Bwoo?

Maladren: Let's pretend he never said those words.

Tirmek's Ghost: In any case, Lilly, I can't believe I'm asking this but I need you to clone me a new body.

Sarah: Wouldn't err...another wizard be better? ANY wizard?

Tirmek's Ghost: It has to be done fairly quickly or my memories will fade away and my spirit drawn to the Underworld.

Lilly: Well I'll just get some hair to clone...

KABLOOM

Lilly: Yeah, I'll just wait for it to stop shooting before I do that.

KABLOOM
KABLOOM
KABLOOM

Lilly: Anytime now...

KABLOOM

Maladren: Is it linked to the Elemental Plane of Ammunition?

Lilly: I'll check the instructions. It should be done by the end of the day....probably.

KABLOOM
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-03-07, 09:27 AM		Two black bunny ears are sticking up through the tank hatch.
rampant

02-03-07, 11:27 AM		Tirmek - Phew!

Sarah - How did you get back?

Tirmek - Repaired my body using psychic powers, then used this nifty posseseion technique to re-inhabit.

Bunny - :mad:

Tirmek - Did you know that Maladren is armor certafied?

Lily - aaaaaaaaaaaaahhh

OOPhips - I'm sorry I called you a guy! Ahhhhh
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-03-07, 01:03 PM		Sithis appears and trips Lilly as he runs past.
the tank fires, misses Lilly and hits Sithis.

KABLOOM

the smoke clears to see Sithis still standing there, a huge hole in his chest. looking rather irritated.

Sithis: Oh look, you midly inconvieniced me.

before their eyes the wound in Sithis's chest heals as if the wound was never there.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-03-07, 01:09 PM		Back in Caralot's dimension, at the table of Lodge Villainy……

Another Bald Shadow: I say this waiting around is pointless. We have the best technology and the best henchpower. I don't understand why we always set up these doomsday devices and then just wait. Action! That's what my father always taught me. At least, that's what he was teaching me by sending me to that backwater Brelish town……:weep: Always like Aaron better……

Sara: Dady issues. I know the feeling.

A.B.S.: Just give me a load of syranium and I can take out the greatest threat to our entire enterprise!

Errandis: (i.h.h. :nonono ) Merrix, Ultra-Man is too dumb to ever successfully oppose us. I mean, his sidekick is an awakened giant moth. His allies consist of a batman-wanabe and a maid who throws her shoes.

Mechanical Shadow (sitting just next to Merrix): And this syranium stuff is purely illogical: just because pieces of his home plane are radioactive they take away all his powers? No, what we need is dragonshards. Cubed, for preference.

Merrix: Listen, you LoBster—

LoB: What did you call me?!

Merrix: I'll call you anything I like, you transforming alien robotic freak!

Sara (to Errandis): These are the best villains you could find?

Errandis (head on table): Some god somewhere likes to make my life miserable.
rampant

02-03-07, 02:40 PM		Feal-thas is studying the display of his last match against Ketty.

Tara - What is this? you've been at it the last day or two.

Feal-thas - Its a war game, sort of like warcraft, chess, and risk rolled together. Ketty has been teaching me to play to keep me occupied since I can't fight until my arm heals.

Tara - A girl eh? *sigh* It seems like just yesterday you were getting measured for booties.

Feal-thas - That was yesterday, Mrs. Greyholme is under the impression that I'm perpetually 2. And its not like that!:embarrass
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-03-07, 04:37 PM		Tara: whatever you say. but at least knitting all that stuff for your several hundred thousand odd siblings keeps her busy. and makes the wool spinners a tidy fortune...

***
scene shows ms. greyholm sitting on a mountain of yarn (or wool if you prefer) knitting away furiously.
Ms. Greyholm: *passing a bright emerald jumper to Naz'roth* there you go.

Naz'roth: *bluff* its lovely. thank you ms greyholm.

Ms. Greyholm: *succede* your welcome dearie. now i've only got 200,532 to go!

Naz'roth shakes his head and teleports out, still holding the jumper.
luna18moon

02-03-07, 04:44 PM		Brea is hiding behind a barrel, silently observing Shred as he walks by.
Brea::cloud9: Shred is so handsome and kind... Is someone watching me?
She glances behind her and sees Rip and Tear.
Brea: You're Shred's brothers, right? Does he have a girlfriend?
Rip: No, (Brea: :dancin:) and he's not
Tear: looking for one.
Brea: :blink: :weep: :allalone:
Both: Yet. :devil:
Rip: We could make him
Tear: more receptive, though.
Brea: Not by controlling his mind.
Rip: You have enourmous
Tear: telepathic potential. However,
Rip: there's a mental block in there
Tear: which also makes you really shy.
Rip: We'll take care of that
Tear: later. For now,
Rip: try meeting the
Tear: ship's inhabitants.
They walk off, leaving Brea alone with her thoughts.
rampant

02-03-07, 04:53 PM		Dorvos - hmmmm

Teiza - New cat

Corre - Smells like psi-spells
-------------------------------------

Ketty - You say your arm is healed?

Feal-thas - Finally, I finally managed to unlock the curse. After that the wound sealed up like its supposed to.

Ketty - *Raising Rose Thorn, and her other Thinblade.* Hope you remember how to fight! HAAAA
rampant

02-03-07, 05:33 PM		Later

Tirmek - Hello mother, you seem to be feeling well this afternoon.

Ketty - Yes, I do, its strange.

Tirmek - (i.h.h. hmmmmmmmmm)

----------------------------------------

Feal-thas - *ear twitch* Huh who's -gah!

A hammer made of azure light clonks the off-gaurd warrior upside his head.

Tirmek - Ok lizard breath one warning! I'm gonna stay out of it, but be aware that I don't trust you.

Feal-thas - What the hell are you talking about ki-igh

Tirmek - *Holding the half-dragon up by his neck* (i.h.h. this would be a lot more intimidating if I was tall enough to get him to his knees at least) You probably don't see it yet. You'll know in good time *drop*

Feal-thas - (i.h.h. the only reason I'm not laughing, is those creepy eyes, just like his aunt's)
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-03-07, 06:47 PM		Silver, 13, & Bunny: WAR! HUH! HUU! WHAT IS IT GOOD FOR?

Silver: GETTIN' PEOPLES HITCHED! :D
rampant

02-03-07, 09:19 PM		Kithle - Not so fast Silver, 13 is up first.

Silver - Noooooooo, I have sketches!

Kithle - Wow! She's flexible.
----------------------------------------------

Ketty - Tirmek is right, I do feel good. Its weird after a fight like that I should be more tired.

---------------------------------------

Feal-thas - Ouch!

Tara - *holding up a pair of pliars with a bloody dagger clamped in their jaws* You should be careful, that raging ***** doesn't pull punches. Or daggers.

Feal-thas - No one speaks of where you found that one.
Charles Phipps

02-03-07, 09:30 PM		Tirmek: Well in any case, this war has settled one thing. Our status as eternal rivals is clearly and finally established for all time.

Lilly: We are the bitterest enemies. This is our common ground.

*Alt-Lilly and Alt-Tirmek walk by as they hold hands*

Lilly: :twitch:

Tirmek: :twitch:
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-03-07, 09:59 PM		*Alt-Lilly and Alt-Tirmek walk by as they hold hands*

Lilly and Tirmek: :twitch:
OOC: You win the :rimshot: award for best representation of a 13ism. :D
urial angel of death

02-03-07, 11:28 PM		OOC: I have no idea what to do with the Yin-Yang world.

IC: Micheal and Lisa are still tied up.

Micheal: So I'll tell you my middle name and you tell me your's.

Lisa: Ugh!

Izzy: *in shadow* Hello, I am to inform you both of your new mission. I-

Dorvos: *crawling in* Goo!

Lisa: Oh he's so cute!

Izzy: *coming out of the shadows* Well that pretty much ruins the mood. Well I'm here to tell you, that you have to work together.

Lisa: What!? I have to work with this filthy Protestant!?

Micheal: You know I don't have to take Vow of Cela-

Lisa: *kicks Micheal in the balls*

Micheal: :eek: How do you do that with your legs tied up.

Izzy: If you don't help us I'll-

Micheal: Who is this "us" you speak of. I only see you and the baby.

Izzy: Well Satnak is resting in the other room after killing a Shoggoth. Now if I can get back to my original threat. If you don't work together I'll force you both to watch the D&D movie, Alien Ressurection, all fifty three Everending Stories, and the Breakfeast Club series with only a miniture cactus and a rusty spoon to carve you eyes out with.

Micheal: Oh God no!

Lisa: Please have mercy!

Izzy: It's settled then. The train will be reaching Siberia any minute now.

Lisa: Wait, we're still in the train?

Izzy: Yeah we're on a low budget. No room for a secret headquarters.
luna18moon

02-03-07, 11:31 PM		Brea was sitting and thinking about what Rip and Tear had said. The circumstances of her birth were... unusual, at best. If she could tap into just a little of that power... The potential was enourmous, just as they said. But there was something there, she could sense it. It seemed so tortured that she almost mimicked its screams. There was a sense of evil hanging around it.
Brea: (i.h.h.) If only I could free it...

Elsewhere:

Rip: Where's
Tear: Mittens?
Shred: She's on another date with Nashvir. :ahem: That... gah, I don't know a good enough insult for him.
Rip: (i.h.h.: :evillaugh) Hey, have you
Tear: seen that new girl?
Shred: :confused: What new girl?
Rip: Thought not. She's
Tear: pretty cute. Not to
Rip: mention the fact
Tear: that she...
Shred: She what?
Rip: :schemes: Oh, you don't
Tear: need to know.
Rip: We actually
Tear: appreciate girls.
Shred: Huh?
Rip: :rolleyes: You actually
Tear: thought we went
Rip: to the mall
Tear: to shop?
Shred: Geez, you guys. I wouldn't even think of dating a girl unless she beat me.
Rip: Let's make a deal, then.
Tear: She defeats you
Rip: and you go out with her.
Tear: At least one date. You'll
Rip: be surprised.
Shred: :eek: :mad: What? No way!
Rip: We'll be
Tear: training her.
They leave.
Shred: How did I get into this?...
rampant

02-04-07, 01:08 AM		OORampant - Because Silver owns us.

Silver - Thats right!:D Ya Mule!
urial angel of death

02-04-07, 01:10 AM		Suddenly all the Entities find themselves in dark forest. They are all in their super smash bros. forms.

OORei: What the crap is happening?!

OOCharles: *voice from the sky* I as DM have decided that all of the characters are becoming too powerful. So I've turned you all into level one characters. Unforunately I have no time to DM anything other than your ultra-powerful characters. My Canadian assistant DM will manage your game. Meet OOQuigley! *exits*

OOQuigley: Hello, I'm going to be your DM and I hope to achieve a death-rate far higher than Call of Cthulhu and Kobold Ate My Baby! combined.

OORampant: I have a bad feeling about this.

OOQuigley: OORei is a first level fighter.

OORei: Hey!

Rest: *point and laugh*

OOQuigley: OORampant is an anthromorphic cat level one telepath going for Metamind.

OORampant: What! Mewtwo is definately more than an anthromorphic cat!

OOQuigley: OOCrystal is a first level gnome bard.

OOCrystal: Jiggleypuff is a gnome?

OOQuigley: Yeah they both suck. :D

OOCrystal: That's cold.

OOQuigley: OOUrial is a first level half amethyst (sp) dragon fighter going for renegade mastermaker.

rest: Why does he get a high LA race?! :mad:

OOUrial: :D

OOQuigley: He has to go through half-dragon savage progression so at level 6 he will have 8 hit points.

OOUrial: :(
ratslinky

02-04-07, 01:20 AM		OORatslinky: Yay I don't have a super smash bros form so I am free to keep doing overpowered things :P like this. *Shoots a first level commoner with meteor swarm. It hits the commoner and fizzles out* :weep:
rampant

02-04-07, 01:25 AM		OORampant - *psionic charm person*

OORei - Rampant my good buddy!

OORampant - I love low will save classes. Now nobody touches me. I have plenty of skill points to assign still and profession (torturer) is still a class skill.

OOKaizer - A dual classed Ranger bard!

OORei - Hey he got 2 levels!

OOquigly - 1st level apprentice dual class system.
-----------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Its good to see my mother interacting with people. Besides do as I say or I'll rip something important out.

Dorvos - :rolleyes: hmmmm

Tirmek - Yeah, they can all be pretty scary.

Dorvos - Hmmmmmmm

Tirmek - More like +4 on intimidate.

Dorvos - Hmmmmmmmmm

Tirmek - No I don't trust him, on the other hand I don't distrust him. I just don't know the guy.

Dorvos - Hmmmmmm

Tirmek - Yeah I don't think they understand quite what's happening. I think its best if just hold off right now. I haven't ever seen Mother without that .... tiredness behind her eyes. Not till today atleast. I think this might be a good thing.

Dorvos - Hmmmmmmmmm

Tirmek - Yeah thanks for listening, for some reason you always know exactly what to say.

Dorvos - Hmmmmmmm
Kaizer_Ryu

02-04-07, 01:26 AM		OOKaizer: *dressed in green* :dancin: WOO HOO!!!

OOQuigley: Like Link, you must find your starting equipment.

OOKaizer: That's...not so bad...

OOQuigley: Which is, of course, a dagger and a wooden shield.

OOKaizer: :weep:
rampant

02-04-07, 02:11 AM		Sarah - I don't understand how you can drink that stuff! Its way too healthy:yuck:

Tirmek - What part of Processed sugar + Me equals psycho Tirmek does no one understand? *sips apple smoothie*

Sarah - I get the whole can't have refined sugar thing, but that stuf is awful.

Tirmek - ...It beats the hell out of banana lemon.
Crystalforged

02-04-07, 04:05 AM		OOCrystalforged: Nononono. I'm not Jigglypuff anymore. I changed characters a long time ago. I'm Ramirez now. You're not stuffing me back into jigglypuff now. Don't make me call in the voices in my head as reinforcements.



EDIT: hmmm, trying to think what a first level Ramirez would be... I'm thinking from what I've heard about Duskblades they would be about right. I don't actually have the book so its hard to be sure. What do you think Kaizer?
Kaizer_Ryu

02-04-07, 11:30 AM		OOKaizer: Sorry, don't have the book with Duskblade. Closest thing I can find that fits Ramirez is Swordsage.

*gets hit by a flaming Keese*

OOKaizer: Oh, for the LOVE OF-! That's the fifth time! :censored: ing wooden piece of crap! Ok, I'm off to desecrate some grave sites till I find a hidden chamber leading to a Hylian shield that won't disintegrate at the first touch of fire. And since I'm a hero, that makes it ok!
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-04-07, 12:39 PM		QUOTE
OOKaizer finally finds the treasure chest under the grave. He opens it.

There is nothing inside except a little slip of paper. He reads it.

Sorry, but in this game you have to buy the shield.
----13

OOKazier: :bored: Ha, ha, ha.
urial angel of death

02-04-07, 01:21 PM		OOC: Who is Ramirez. I've looked it up on the web and got two serial killers, one actress, and a character from Manhunt
Crystalforged

02-04-07, 01:58 PM		He's a character, one of the primary villians actually, from the game Skies of Arcadia. A game which both Kaizer and I are quite fond of. Actually I'm sure both Kaizer and I have answered this question before but that was a while back. Here's a link to a Wikipedia page with some info on him if it will help.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Skies_of_Arcadia_characters
DungeonJman

02-04-07, 05:35 PM		OOC: The Yin-Yang World essentially just looks weird, with clouds for ground, and a black sky with white kana (japanese letters) in the background. If your mind is strong enough, you can theoretically alter it. No life of any kind exists naturally. Now on with the plot

OOQuigley: Hey! You can't do that! I hold power you over as the DM!

OODungeonJ: *holds up the wiki-scroll contributers and characters* Read it and weep!

OOQuigley: But i don't see anything that helps you here?

OODungeonJ: Exactly, but neither have i been documented as a poster or an E.B.N.E. of any kind. According to it, i don't exist, as an E.B.N.E. or a char from that one time, so you can't do anything as long as the wiki remains unupdated.

OOQuigley: That doesn't make any sense!

OODungeonJ: Welcome to the Forgotten Freedom, i am the E.B.N.E. of lawful pain in the rearness (more so than anyone else here) so exploiting the rules like that comes naturally. However i can not find a reason within the law to stop you from what you're doing, so carry on.

________________________
*meanwhile in the Yin-Yang world, Nobby has been horribly beaten up*

Evil DungeonJ: I think that's enough fun.

Nobby: What.. what are you going to do? Kill me?

Evil DungeonJ: Nah, too simple *walks over and picks up the Yang Yo-yo* I prefer to leave you here with just one yo-yo, so you can't escape as yourself.

Nobby: Won't it affect you?

Evil DungeonJ: I'm only comprised of evil chi, the Yin-Yang world can't take away one type if no other would remain. Yang Yo-Yo!

*jumps through the portal and returns to the forgotten freedom*

Nobby: Oh crud.

*passes out*
Kaizer_Ryu

02-04-07, 05:57 PM		*BONK*

Evil DungeonJ: Ow! Who threw that?

OOKaizer: *holding the Slingshot* :D :P I love this thing.

Evil DungeonJ: Wait...that shouldn't have hurt me at all. I'm, what, 50 levels higher than you?

OOKaizer: *holds up the new Contributer's list* :evillaugh

All of DungeonJ: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! (http://darthno.ytmnd.com/)

OOQuigley: I have you now.
DungeonJman

02-04-07, 06:04 PM		OOC: Theoretically, he should have been 19 levels higher than you, but that's not the point.

Evil DungeonJ: Well, this stinks, time to get back where i belong.

*turns into an shadow and goes inside my head*

*reads that*

Wait.. What? Gaaaah! Man that feels nasty!

*Anyway, once inside*

Evil DungeonJ: I wonder what's happened in here since i left.

*sees that the portion of the mind where he resides is now 5/6 gears (like, for lack of a true Eberronian equivalent, Mechanus) and the other 1/6 is a field with perpetual light and happiness, but it's supported by white gears.

Good DungeonJ: Aaaaah! The Lawfulness is infecting what's left!
Kaizer_Ryu

02-04-07, 06:26 PM		OOC: Evil has a tendancy to overestimate itself. ;)
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-04-07, 07:02 PM		OOC: Evil has a tendancy to overestimate itself. ;)

how else could the heroes win? could you imagine what would happen if a bond villain actually noticed all the huge gapeing flaws in their death traps?
Charles Phipps

02-04-07, 07:19 PM		Rose: In any case, having made my escape from the terrible realm of Argonessan.

Zella: Where have you been?

Rose: IMPRISONED!

Zella: Well I hope you don't expect ME to rescue you.

Rose: I've decided to become more like the hero of Skies of Arcadia.

Zella: Except you're old.

Rose: Shut up!

Zella: Well I suppose I'll be the cute Priestess.

Rose: But...

Zella: I assume that I get approval on your pirate lass recruitment?

Rose: NO!

Zella: Everyone start getting into Pirate Lass recruitment Mode. I'll contact the Navy of Breland so we can start fearing it.
urial angel of death

02-04-07, 07:31 PM		evil DungeonJman is pulled back into the forest.

OOQuigley: As I said before you are mine now.

DungeonJman: :(

OOQuigley: *pulls out copy of sunless citadel.*

OORei: Wooh this'll be easy.

OOUrial: I wouldn't be so sure.

OOQuigley: You are attacked by twelve creautres composed of twigs.

OOQuigley's words become reality. One of the creatures claws at OOCrystal.

OOCrystal: Okay three damage I can survive that.

OOQuigley: Make a fortitude save! :D

OOCrystal: Crap! 11!

OOQuigley: You die from level drain.

OORei: Oh ****! Vampire twig blights!

OOUrial takes to the air.

OOUrial: See ya suckers.

All of the twig blights point their arms up and fire a volley of spikes.

OOUrial: :eek:
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-04-07, 08:38 PM		OODungeonJ: ………i am the E.B.N.E. of lawful pain in the rearness (more so than anyone else here)
13: :bored: No, I do not want to claim that title. I am not an E.B.N.E., nor do I have ethics or morals. Alignment would never be able to do what I do:
All of the twig blights point their arms up and fire a volley of spikes.

OOUrial: :eek:
13: :devil:
Charles Phipps

02-04-07, 08:46 PM		Zella: The real question is...are we blue pirates or black pirates?
Crystalforged

02-04-07, 09:26 PM		OOC: Hm, I don't have swordsage either but from what I know about the Tome of Battle stuff that sounds exactly like Ramirez. I think I'll go with swordsage. Not that it seems to matter that much now...




OOQuigley: You die from level drain.
OOCrystalforged: (hovering ghost like over his corpse) Ah ****. So does that mean I have to roll up a new character? This sucks.

...wait a tic, I'm dead. That means I'm no longer in the game, so then I'm not under your control anymore. Sweet!

---

Zella: The real question is...are we blue pirates or black pirates?
Kanatash: Well unless we have so evil empire we've actually been fighting all this time when we raided people I'm pretty sure we'd be black pirates.
Charles Phipps

02-04-07, 09:38 PM		Kanatash: Well unless we have so evil empire we've actually been fighting all this time when we raided people I'm pretty sure we'd be black pirates.

Jarlot: It would, of course, help that we actually raided people on occasion.

Rose: Yesss....

*Lisa taps her foot*
Ryuu_Tenshi

02-04-07, 09:44 PM		*a somewhat confused uranium katana wielding a nazi falls through the thread, to the sound of kittens exploding*
Crystalforged

02-04-07, 10:01 PM		Jarlot: It would, of course, help that we actually raided people on occasion.

Rose: Yesss....

*Lisa taps her foot*
Kanatash: Really? I thought the entity decree was that we do plenty of raiding, it just isn't interesting enough anymore to bother writing down since most of the time the people just hand us the valuables rather than tangling with us.

*a somewhat confused uranium katana wielding a nazi falls through the thread, to the sound of kittens exploding*
Kanatash: (chewing on cigar) I love the smell of random insanity in the morning.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-04-07, 10:53 PM		OOKaizer: *happily mowing down the Vampy twigs* Well, you could consider the Dragons of Argonessen an evil empire. And since most everyone is their b*tch, that means we're raiding them no matter what we do. So we could make a case for Blue Rogue.

OOQuigley: You've been hit with level drain like 70 times. WHY WON'T YOU :censored: ING DIE?!

OOKaizer: Hello? Link here. Link needs no levels. *picks up hearts the twigs drop* Though this is a pretty gross way to regain health...
rampant

02-04-07, 11:00 PM		Teiza - Ok Sis Lets see what nonsense those wussies have you studying this time.

Teiza unleashes a Wave of dark crystal

Corre - What is your Problem?

Corre counters with a Whirling storm of Shuriken blazing with the fires of the desert wind

Teiza - What can you posibly learn from the weak?

Teiza stabs the air and blades of shadow form behind Corre.

Corre - How to deal with the strong sister, how to deal with the strong.

Ruby ribbons explode from Corre's back and parry the shadow blades.
DungeonJman

02-04-07, 11:02 PM		Evil DungeonJ: :mad: Why does no one realize that if you keep yanking me out of his head, his brain's going to realize that i'm not there?

13: We like torturing you, it's funny to see you constantly getting ripped out of his head no matter how hard you try.

Evil DungeonJ: *indignant and yelling* YOU WANT HIS PERSONALITY TO REVERT TO THE SAME AS THAT SOUL FRAGMENT OF IVY'S?

13: You mean Yuan?

Evil DungeonJ: Yes! When i say that something horrible will happen when his brain realizes i'm not there, i mean that his personality and actions will shift to the kind of puke-worthy chivalrous lawful good which is exemplary of that alignment!
rampant

02-04-07, 11:11 PM		Kithle - Precisely! Since Lily so distractable, Miko is too evil, And Lisa has better things to do (i.e. Terra) than lecture us. We need a new Straight man to torment.
---------------------------

Edit: Is gregory dead dead?
Paulon

02-04-07, 11:18 PM		*eyes Kithle*

I'm not sure whether I'm glad I haven't had the time to do some 'creative' writing to introduce a new character or not. One thing's for sure, Caer would make a great straight man for the FF crew, female or not.
urial angel of death

02-04-07, 11:31 PM		Edit: Is gregory dead dead?

OOC: Not quite. I just need to figure out how to work around the Yin-Yang World and you will see.
rampant

02-04-07, 11:37 PM		Gregory - Dieing hurts!

Aerith - Tell me about it.:rolleyes:

Ivy - The worst part is when they put your spleen back in while you watch.
--------------------------------------------------------

Ketty - Ready for another round.

Feal-thas - No, It takes forever to heal from that blasted thorn sword.

Ketty - Part of its power.

Feal-thas - Preaching to the choir, i heartily believe that thing has been invovled in 2,000,000 painful deaths.
---------------------------------------

Bunny - 2,314,567... Not counting that team of Demon Slayers earlier this afternoon, or the ninja assasin before breakfast.

---------------------------------------------

Ketty - Well then I guess I'd better be going. *gets up to leave*

Feal-thas - Hold on we could go do something else? (i.h.h. why did I say that)
Crystalforged

02-04-07, 11:53 PM		OOCrystalforged: (still ghosted and watching OOKaizer) Hmph. If he doesn't play by the rules I don't see why I should. :lightbulb :angelhide How could I forget! (slaps forehead) Video game villans always have a second form that twice as powerful as their first one! (Hold up arm revealing a silver crystal in the back of his hand) I call upon you by the power of the silver moon! Come, Zelos!

*A human sized sphere of a strange silvery substance descends from the sky. It slides over OOCrystalforged like liquid, drawing him in. Moments later the sphere peels apart like a flower revealing Silver monstrosity (http://soaworld.rpgplanet.gamespy.com/gallery/window.php?19)that is humanoid only in the most liberal sense with OOCrystalforged half-merged into the center of it.*

OOCrystalforged: (now with crazy eyes) Now you shall see my true power! Now you shall DIE!

*commence massive twiggy slaughter*
Charles Phipps

02-04-07, 11:54 PM		Jarlot: SHHHHh don't let Lisa hear that!

Lisa: WHAT!? WE DO WHAT NOW!?

Rose: Ummm....she did it!

*points at Marish*
urial angel of death

02-05-07, 12:25 AM		OOKaizer: *happily mowing down the Vampy twigs* Well, you could consider the Dragons of Argonessen an evil empire. And since most everyone is their b*tch, that means we're raiding them no matter what we do. So we could make a case for Blue Rogue.

OOQuigley: You've been hit with level drain like 70 times. WHY WON'T YOU :censored: ING DIE?!

OOKaizer: Hello? Link here. Link needs no levels. *picks up hearts the twigs drop* Though this is a pretty gross way to regain health...

OOQuigley: Your disrespect for the DM has cost you quite a few check on your horrible death chart.

OOKaizer: So nothing on the Kobolds ate my baby horrible death chart can kill Link.

OOQuigley: Of course not that is why I have created a special one just for you. *rolls*

OOKaizer: How bad could it be?

A chicken appears.

OOKaizer: AAAAAAAAAAAAA
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *runs as fast as he can**which of course as per Zelda games is only two thirds the chicken's speed.
Crystalforged

02-05-07, 12:43 AM		OOCrystalforged: (hip deep in kindling) Wait a sec Kaizer, aren't you Twilight Princess Link?

OOKaizer: (pausing) Yes, yes I am.

OOCrystalforged: :smirk: You know what that means.

OOKaizer: :devil: Yes, yes I do.

OOKaizer stops and turns to face his feathery persuer. As it draws near he unsheaths his sword in one smooth motion using the mortal draw on the cucoo which in turn freezes in place after being struck. OOKaizer's body goes still and the Chicken turns around to face OOQuigley with a demonic gleem in its eyes. The cucoo charges and much feathery slaughter begins.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-05-07, 12:49 AM		OOC: LOL urial!

You get the :invasion: award for pointing out Link's one and only weakness.

Why the :invasion: award, you ask? Imagine Link. Imagine the Cucco. Imagine Link attacking the Cucco.

There you have it.

Which brings me to the flaw in the punishment.

IC:

OOKaizer: *clutching his chest* Oh, THANK YOU MERCIFUL GODS! It's only a chicken. *stabs at the chicken*

OOQuigley: Oh, wait. *snaps his fingers* That should do it.

The chicken turns into the dreaded Invincible Cucco. And he's ****** that OOKaizer stabbed it.

OOKaizer: :eek: :weep:

Invincible Cocco: :fight!: *crows*

:invasion: :fight!:

OOKaizer: Mommy...

EDIT: I'm not Twilight Princess Link just yet. I was deemed not awesome enough and had the title taken away. I've managed to make it back to Link to the Past level (fighting my way out of crippling Spoonyness ala Adventure of Link level suckage), but my plan to regain my full awesomeness is still a little more story away.
rampant

02-05-07, 12:50 AM		OORampant - Stop stepping on my schtick!

OOCluckaizer - Buc-cluk

OOQuigly - Eeeeeeaaaa! Stop the pecking!
---------------------------------------------------

Ketty - Like what?

Feal-thas - ... (i.h.h. I need more hobbies) You up for a go on the link crystals?

Ketty - Ok, be warned I'm not going to fall for the same trick twice.
----------------------------------------------------------------

Later

Ketty - And then the creep actually tried to poison me. Me! the heir of thorns hahahaha, needless to say i shoved the poisoned goblet so far up his nose you could use him for a flag-pole.

Feal-thas - (i.h.h. she's brutal, merciless, twisted, sadistic, and has a massively overdeveloped sense of revenge... I think I'm in love..!!that's what the whelp was so tweaked about!)
Charles Phipps

02-05-07, 02:00 AM		A Misty Forrest

Kaizer_Ryu: At last, the Master Sword.

*walks up to the resting place of the Sword*

*heroically pulls...*

*tug*

*tug*

*gets both hands on the blade's edge and uses his feet to tug*

Kaizer_Ryu: TRIFORCE DAMNIT!

Rose: oooooo someone forget his three pendants?

*Rose waves them about*

Kaizer_Ryu: I did not! I went to all the palaces and took them! Oddly, all the bosses had been defeated but there were Pendants!

Rose: Check yours.

Kaizer_Ryu: What the....MADE IN MOBILN TOWN!?

Rose: Yes, I already cleaned out the palaces and took the pendants. This is where I returned the Master sword after finishing the game.

Kaizer_Ryu: But...But...I still am on my first game!

Rose: Cry me a waterfall.

Kaizer_Ryu: How about just one of the Crystal Girls? I mean, I can be a hero then right?

Rose: The only crystals your worth are the kind to slip into the statues at the end of palaces.... in a sidescroller.

Kaizer_Ryu: :tears up:

Rose: Tell you what, you can remain Link II link or you can take the Link Cap in the box.

*pulls out...the box*

Kaizer_Ryu: BOX! BOX!

Rose: You sure? It could be worse.

Kaizer_Ryu: Nothing is worse!

*grabs box and exchanges Link cap*

Zella: Feel any different?

Kaizer_Ryu: No

Zella: I guess you're not Link enough.

Kaizer_Ryu: Well EXCUUSSSEEEEEEEEEEE me Princess!

*A look of horror passes over Kaizer_Ryu's face*
Kaizer_Ryu

02-05-07, 02:28 AM		*A look of horror passes over Kaizer_Ryu's face*
OOKaizer: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Rose: :rolleyes: I could always have made you Wand of Gamalon Link.

OOKaizer: That is NOT a Legend of Zelda game! I deny it! In fact, I'm gonna go destroy it right now! :fight!:

*portal opens and OOKazier runs through with murder on his mind*

*scene of unimaginable violence with campy lines spouted off faster than the gushing blood*

*OOKaizer leaves the portal and closes it just as the rivers of blood begin to flow through*

OOKaizer: *huff* *pant* Ok, *gasp* they're all dead. *wheese* That's gotta be worth something.

*GLOWY LIGHT*

Rose: Congratulations. For your efforts, you've been deemed worthy to be Links Awakening Link.

OOKaizer: :weep: But I wanted to be 8-bit Link. Or at least Oracle of Ages/Seasons Link... :allalone:

Rose: Not a chance in hell. The only reason you won is because Wand of Gamalon has absolutely no redeeming features what-so-ever. The gods of Nintendo merely pitied you. You have more to do to regain your place. Now, destroy the one and only drawback of Ocarina of Time!

OOKaizer: DEATH TO THE GREAT FAIRIES!!!!! :fight!: *runs off*

Zella: Did you mention that he could just remove the hat?

Rose: He's so sincere in his bloodthirsty fandom, I just didn't have the heart to tell him. He looked so happy as he butchered the black spots on the Zelda franchise.
Charles Phipps

02-05-07, 02:33 AM		Zella: What I don't get is....why are you Link? Link isn't a Bard.

Rose: How many other video game heroes have their own tutorials on PLAYING AN ****ing flute?

Zella ....

Rose: Guy can cast magic, fight, and randomly robs people's houses.

Zella: :twitch:

Rose: Come on. It must have occur...

Zella: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO O

*Zella joins Kaizer in massacring stuff*
rampant

02-05-07, 02:45 AM		OOC : I said it right near the start of this Ranger/Bard. No one listens.

Kithle - *in fake frued beard* and how does this make you feel?

OORampant - *lying on shrink couch* Well it makes me want to play a fang dragon totemist/sorcerer so I can lord it over everyone else's characters.
--------------------------------

Teiza - *coats her hand in a blade of shadow* You're not gonna like this!

Corre - *readies her hand-axe and shortspear* Bring it!
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-05-07, 07:25 AM		OOKaizer stops, with a surprised expression on his face.

OOKaizer: Why do I feel like I've been given some sort of divine inspiration?

*flashback to when Kaizer and Zella were kids*

Zella: Oh, Kaizer, I wish you wouldn't go. I just know some other guy wearing your exact same costume is going to come along, and he's going to be all spoony.

Kaizer: I'm sorry, but I must go find my fairy companion Navi, despite the fact that I do not have the type of patience that would ever let me adventure with such a person.

Zella: Then at least take the Ocarina of Time, so that you shall always remember your most popular adventure. And too, remember the Song of Time, which has little function in that game. *plays Song of Time*

*end flashback*

OOKaizer: Okay, I'm smart enough to take an in-game hint. *pulls out Ocarina, plays Song*

*warpy effects*

OOKaizer: Hey, cool, I'm back at the castle.

Even more useless fairy companion: And it's the day before Rose took all the pendants.

OOKaizer: But how do I get this blasted hat off?

OOcat-dressed as Mask Salesman: I shall now teach you the Song of Healing…………:weep: Always brings me to tears.

The hat falls off.

OOKaizer: Now to beat Rose to the pendants!
DungeonJman

02-05-07, 07:53 AM		Evil DungeonJ: Can you please let me do something?

OODungeonJ: No.

Evil DungeonJ: Not even...?

OODungeonJ: No, let me deal with this.

Anyway, you forgot about me being a swordsage.

OOQuigley: So?

OODungeonJ: Combined with the knowledge that you would subvert me to be under your control (like it isn't obvious) i formed a weapon out of nothing in the last second before you turned me into a first level char.

OOQuigley: *pouting* fine, so you won't die as fast. So what?

OODungeonJ: Stone Dragon is my starting discipline *takes out the hammergun and takes a martial pose* wow this looks so dumb. Anyway, FLYING HAMMER STRIKE!

*shoots him with the hammergun*

The only DM-touch, DM bane weapon!
urial angel of death

02-05-07, 12:43 PM		OOQuigley: You may be able to hit me, but that is a far shot from being able to defeat let alone kill me. As a DM I have divine rank 50, 500 hit dice, epic level spells, and max hit point per hit dice. Oh yes and let's not forget an amazing sunder check.

hammergun shatters.

DungeonJman: :weep:

OOQuigley: Oh yes and Link has two more weaknesses. Neither of which I will tell you until you really **** me off again. Also excellent use of abilities OOCrystal for that I award you another level and the role of recuring villian.

OOCrystal: :D See you guys later *teleports away*

OOQuigley: You come to a ravine.
Crystalforged

02-05-07, 01:57 PM		OOCrystalforged: You know normally being a villain, even a recuring one, would be a bad thing. Everyone knows what happens to the villains in the end. Somehow I feel a little diferently about that in this campain...:D
Charles Phipps

02-05-07, 02:14 PM		Kaizer_Ryu: At last! The final pendant! My future with Zella is secu...

Rose: Ever heard of predestination paradox?

Kaizer_Ryu: But I just defeated all the monsters! That changed history!

Rose: Final half heart friend.

*Kaizer_Ryu is clubbed in the side of the head as he begins spinning around and plops on the ground*

*Rose yoinks his stuff*

Kaizer_Ryu: *sniffle* *clicks Continue*
rampant

02-05-07, 03:27 PM		Roosevelt - You lot get moving! Corre's home and that means Teiza will be on the warpath! I need the lumber mobile yesterday!
--------------------------------------------

Teiza - Are too!

Smashes Corre with a table, that immediatly shatters.

Corre - Are not!

Shoves Teiza through a wall.
DungeonJman

02-05-07, 10:38 PM		*after waking up, getting up, and picking up the Yin Yo-Yo*

Nobby: Uh, guys? we got a problem.

Volrath:*currently throwing Giovanni's body around the room* What? Your opponent got away?

Nobby: No! Well, yes, but that's not important! He took one of the yo-yo's!

Volrath: So, since he's not here, that must mean that you can use one to get home. *grabs it* Yin Yo-Y...

*has the yo-yo knocked out of his hands*

What the?

Nobby: You can't use one yo-yo when getting out! Or else your head gets rearranged to the opposite alignment when you come out!

Volrath: *visibly annoyed* Fine, so how do we get out without the Evil DungeonJ coming back?

Nobby: We don't. I have a plan for how we can get out, when he realizes that he can turn me evil by sending me to the FF with one yo-yo, but he won't be coming back until the "new DM" is gone, since he's a part of my E.B.N.E.'s personality, and is thus under that guy's control.
urial angel of death

02-05-07, 11:01 PM		OOQuigley: Is that all that's needed. *steals other yo-yo from DungeonJman* Now I'll set everything right.

Volrath, Giovanni, Gregory disappear from the the Yin-Yang World and go back the Eberron as if nothing had ever happened. Volrath attempts to climb up Giovanni's back.

Giovanni: Get off of me you heathen!

Giovanni stabs one of his holy swords into Volrath's face, which just happens to be right about his own. This causes Volrath to bleed a torent of acid straight onto his opponent's head.

Giovanni: *scream*

Volrath: *pulls sword out* So you can't regenerate acid. Things are about to get more interesting. :devil:
DungeonJman

02-05-07, 11:26 PM		Evil DungeonJ: Man i'm feeling lousy about my plans failing. Meh, nothing like team killing to brighten a force of abstract ideas up!

*begins blasting OODungeonJ*

OODungeonJ: *while running* You... ow! can't...ow! do that!......OWWW!
rampant

02-05-07, 11:41 PM		Terra - What are you two fighting about now?

Teiza - This has to be about something?

Smashes a vase accross the back of Corre's head.

Corre - Since when do we need a reason?

Throws a chair at Teiza.

Lisa - :rolleyes:
rampant

02-06-07, 03:20 AM		Terra - Out you two, and use the-

Crash!

Terra - door!

Lisa - They really are Satnak's kids.

Terra - I think they broke furniture we don't even have.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-06-07, 01:13 PM		Sithis raised a blackgloved hand to Terra and Lisa's door, knocking twice he waited. His elven ears picked up the sound of movement as the door's handle turned. Lisa stood in the doorway,

Lisa: yes?

Sithis: i was wondering if Elina and Sarah where in?

( i'll let Kaizer answer that)
DungeonJman

02-06-07, 06:54 PM		That's it. *draws out swords, which are revealed to be a pair of daggers, due to starting equipment gold* Darn it!

Evil DungeonJ: *barely suppressing a laugh while about to throw another eldritch blast*

Oh..hehe...is that..hehe.. the best that you..hehe.. have? *bursts out laughing*

OODungeonJ: *daggers go on fire as he adopts punishing stance* Still a swordsage. *initiates Shadow Blade Technique before attacking*

Evil DungeonJ: :eek: Oh crud. *procedes to get knocked out cold, due to first level hit dice*

OODungeonJ: Wait, since i just beat him, does that mean?

*hears a "ping" sound*

Ok, that's either xp or something is about to get altered in a really messed up way.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-06-07, 07:41 PM		OODungeonJ:…………Ok, that's either xp or something is about to get altered in a really messed up way.
There is a horrifying screech, and a hoarde of half-biscuits wearing colored fatsuits with television stomachs and TV antenna heads comes swarming over the hill.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-06-07, 08:49 PM		( i'll let Kaizer answer that)
Lisa: Well, they're not here at the moment, but they're wandering around somewhere on board. *turns* Hey hon? What'd Sarah say she was doing?

Terra: :rolleyes: What else?

-----

Tirmek: (i.h.h.) Must...breathe...but...don't...want...to ...stop... :cloud9:

Sarah: (i.h.h.) He's really gotten better at this. :cloud9:

-----

Lisa: Oh, right. *turns back* I think she said they were headed for Erk's Place for lunch. Elina's been tagging along with Lilly lately, so I think she's with him.

Terra: She is, but now may not be the best time to see her.

Sithis: :confused: Why not?

-----

Lilly: :weep:

Miko: *pull* You didn't say no, so you can't argue!

Elina: :mad: *yank*

Miko: *tug* Oh, so it's the silent treatment, is it? Well, fine! Just let him go and I'll leave you alone.

Elina: *drag* :noway:

Lilly: :weep: ...my shoulders... :weep:
DungeonJman

02-06-07, 09:03 PM		*everyone looks in horror at the half biscuit army*|

OODungeonJ: Ok, there is a way to defeat them, all we have to do is... *stares into space blankly before passing out*

Other E.B.N.E.'s: What was that about?

Evil DungeonJ: *weakly* his brain's reformatting itself, because it finally realized i'm not there. Something will happen along the line of switching one of his feats for an Exalted feat, and his personality will go insanely chivalrous. Don't say i didn't warn you. *somehow finds the strength to diabolically laugh at full volume before passing out again*
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-06-07, 09:45 PM		Tirmek: (i.h.h.) Must...breathe...but...don't...want...to ...stop... :cloud9:

Sarah: (i.h.h.) He's really gotten better at this. :cloud9:
Silver: :devil:

OOKaizer: :tantrum: She's just hugging him!

Silver: :devil: They're 14.

OOKazier: :eek:………………

A red ship with a dragon figurehead appears.

King of Red, Yet Not Evil, Dragons: Never fear, your game companion is here.

OOKaizer: A ship? :confused:

King: You'd rather I was an annoying fairy? Or a sarcastic imp?

OOKaizer: Good point.
DungeonJman

02-06-07, 09:57 PM		OOUrial: Meh, i'm sure that "rearrangement problem" that he keeps talking about is nothing really scary.

*gets up and is surrounded by an aura of light. (Exalted feat: Nimbus of Light)*

OODungeonJ: What happened? *sees the half biscuit army*

*in an extremely happy sounding voice* An army of evil approaches, quickly, we must set up a defense system so that they will not approach, or if they do, to make sure that they do not invade any other towns or fortifications while we attempt to talk to them, or if need be, render them unconscious in the most humane, non harmful way possible! Away!

*begins building a barricade*

OOUrial: Ok, i was right, not scary, just really creepy in the "good alignment" sort of way.

______________________-

*the angel from the time Tirmek was sent to heaven reappears and wakes the Evil DungeonJ up*

The Angel of Evil: You've really done it, you hear! You know that the boss doesn't like people having no free will and being uncontrollably good!

Evil DungeonJ: Look, being an evil inclination on this ship is harder for an E.B.N.E., i tried to get back in, but no dice!

The Angel of Evil: Fine, we'll let you keep your job, under one condition that you have to fulfill during the time that you can not get into his head

Evil DungeonJ: Anything!

_______
*later*

Evil DungeonJ: Next time, i should really consider the possibilities before saying yes.

*is in a Donald Duck costume at Disney World*
Kaizer_Ryu

02-06-07, 11:05 PM		OOKaizer: :tantrum: She's just hugging him!OOC: Actually, I mean't to imply kissing, but that's still better than what Silver was thinking. ;)
rampant

02-07-07, 01:28 AM		Tirmek - (i.h.h. losing ....consciousness...worth it!:cloud9: )
-------------------------------------------------

Feal-thas - *sigh* Ok back up (i.h.h. love might be a little strong at this point)

Silver - NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Feal-thas - (i.h.h. but you are definetly falling for Ketty, ok next question how do I avoid becoming Sarah's next set of mocassins?)
------------------------------------

Teiza - Its good to have you back sis.

Corre - Same time next month?

Roosevelt - :weep:

Scene expands to show a trail of destruction and devastation that worms through the ship like a worm through an apple.

Cole - I wanna know How I got tangled in the rigging

Shcroedigger - Oh shove it! I near got my tail bitten off.

A.W.L. - Pansies

Lady - From the one who was screaming "please don't kill me"

Scias - :D

Momo - Need to be prepared guys.

Nina - Oh let me help you down

Dies - OOH I have just the spell *web*

Nina - How does making them sticky help?

Dies - Who said I was helping?
rampant

02-07-07, 01:58 AM		Dorvos - Hmmmmmm *brandishes quarterstaff*thwack*Thwack*thwack*

Miko - You little!

Lily - Ouch!

Elina - :confused:

Dorvos hands out a slip of paper to each

Miko - Its just a :P smiley

Lily - Its a signed permission slip from Tirmek for dorvos to take over his duties as bane of my existence, whenever The fuzz-ball is busy.

Elina - :confused: (her note just says "pie makes everything better*....*bring me pie*)
Kaizer_Ryu

02-07-07, 02:01 AM		OOC: I think you got Nina and Deis mixed up, rampant. But still hilarious. :D

Remember:

Nina = Helpful and nice

Deis = Contrary and vindictive
rampant

02-07-07, 02:17 AM		Dorvos - Hmmmmmmm

Teiza - No Dorvos I don't think my crystal constitutes an unfair advantage in Haz'rack. My haymaker might though.

Dorvos - Hmmmmmmmmmmm

Teiza - No the medusa turning to stone did not strike me as odd.
------------------------------------------------------------------------

Medusa sorceress - Fear my baleful eyes pathetic children!

Teiza - *glare*

Medusa sorceress - :gel:
urial angel of death

02-07-07, 07:30 AM		OOC: If anyone wants to be a minion of either OOUrial or OOKaizer please apply here (http://archive.gamespy.com/comics/nodwick/ps238/files/MinionApplication.pdf)

IC: Lisa bursts into Gregory's dorm room only to see Volrath fighting Giovanni, an enormous warforged, and a man she recognized as Hensen; one of the higher ranking inquisitionors. She also notices a nearly dead doppelganger wearing Gregory's old cloths.

Volrath: Wow, this is ackward. I can explain.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-07-07, 08:03 AM		OOC: Actually, I mean't to imply kissing, but that's still better than what Silver was thinking. ;)
Silver: :evillaugh

OOKaizer: I just explained myself into a corner, didn't I? :bored:

Bunny: Yah think? :ahem:
rampant

02-07-07, 12:36 PM		Sarah - ... Breathe Tirmek!

Tirmek - What? Huh? why'd you wake me up I was having the most marvellous dream, we were snogging so much I lost...Conciousness that wasn't a dream was it.

Sarah - Nope now shift I wanna try it with girl you.

Lily's table

Miko - Ahh geeze, those two should just get a room.

Lily - Girls kissing :drool:....but one is really Tirmek...:twitch:

Elina - :mad:

Dorvos - Hmmmm *throws a pie in Elina's face*

Elina - :confused:

Dorvos hands her another slip of paper.

it reads : Pie makes everything better...so get better already!
rampant

02-07-07, 12:40 PM		OORampant - This is too easy. Secret arts: Water bucket Technique!

Starts splashing the half-biscuits with the King's bailing bucket, and the water around the boat.

Half-Biscuits - Nooooooooooooooo

OORampant - Nothing less threatening then a soggy baked good.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-07-07, 01:56 PM		Sarah, Elina, Lilly and Tirmek are all gathered around a table, Sithis enters and also sits at the table.

Lilly: alright Vamp, spill it. why did you invite us here?

Tirmek: and was it really neccesary to have the note's delivered by a swarm of bats?

Sithis: yes. yes it was. if i have the power to summon bat swarms i might as well use if for somthing. *glances at Lillys impatience* anyway. I've gathered you all here for a reason, over the past few months i've been researching a particular Item. i came across this.

Sithis places a folded piece of yellowing cloth on the table. he then unfolds it, revealing a long rod of obsidian. its in the shape of an octagonal prisim, engraved along its length are strange runes. they seem to be no known language, though they seem to share some traits with certain extraplanar languages.
Tirmek reaches out to touch it, curiosity on his face.

Sithis: Dont touch it with bare hands. otherwise, you'll suffer the same fate i did when i first touched it.

Sithis removes the glove on his right hand, to reveal burnt and warped flesh, patches of his skin are covered in weeping sore's. a smell of putrification and decay reaches their noses, causing many of them to move away.on the centre of his palm a rune is burnt into his flesh. it seems to irradiate an aura of malice and its design is similar to that of the runes of the rod. Sithis keeps the hand in view for a moment before replacing the glove.

Sithis: and that was three months ago. the wound seems to resist any magic I or any of the Ubers i have approached possess. trust me, it took all My power to stop the curse before it continued.

Tirmek: have you managed to decifer its purpose?

Sithis: no, the language on its length is unreadable. but from the information i found this with i belive it to be a key of some sort.

Sarah: a Key to What?

Lilly: is it gold? it bet its gold.

Sithis: i found this with a Journel, a journel of an expedition undertaken over two hundred years to a mythical city dating back before the beggining of the Giant empire. The City, or i should say Ruin, was said to be on a Large island off the coast of Frostfell. The City does not exist in any current legends, and its name has alas been lost to time.
what i do know, is that These beings possessed Knowledge that i seek, it is said that they managed to cross the barriers between worlds. they also, forged the "Key" that you see here. as well as, This.

Sithis removes an Item from around his neck, its forged from a strange metal that glimmers slightly. at his head is a Symbol, Two dragons curled about a blacksappire. the gems surface is engraved with the same Rune that now occupies Sithis's palm.

Sithis: I intend to journey to this City and enter it, once within, i not only seek to find a cure for the retchid curse on my hand but discover what inhabited this City during its prime. The Reason I gathered you here is to invite you along with me, i would not be able to do this alone, and i have grown to rely on your abilities. would you accompany me on this expedition?

OOC: i'll allow you all to write your own answers, also, any other characters (except ubers) whom wish to join the expedition need only ask.
rampant

02-07-07, 02:42 PM		Tirmek - Teiza has been itching for something to do, and she might resist anymore such curse far more effectively than any of us. And since I can't pass up a chance to research this sort of thing myself...I'm coming too.

Sarah - Ahem

Tirmek - If its alright with Sarah of course.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-07-07, 03:17 PM		Sarah - Ahem

Tirmek - If its alright with Sarah of course.
13: Whu-pish!

Silver: :D

Bunny: Some day you two are going to have to tell me how you came up with that arrangement.
urial angel of death

02-07-07, 05:03 PM		Kerrith: Oooo can I go please please please. I just screams "lots of magic goodies in store".
Charles Phipps

02-07-07, 05:26 PM		Miko: Oh woe, how do I get Lilly to love me when being a sexy just barely legal schoolgirl isn't enough?

Hyral: *hands her a Lilly plushie*

Miko: YAY! VOODOO!
ratslinky

02-07-07, 06:06 PM		Esabar: I am so coming. Ancient evil, Curses, Forgotten lore :drool: :inlove:

Gaz: Ooh me to I love curses they are awesome for practical jokes :plotting:

Mareth: I'll come to it's been a while since I went outside One Eye. And their might be things to copy
rampant

02-07-07, 06:16 PM		Hyral: *hands her a Lilly plushie*

Miko: YAY! VOODOO!

Hyrd - :D

Ivy - Do you know voodoo?

Hyrd - No know voodoo, what voodoo do?

Miko - Its the voodoo that i do do

Lily - I'm lost, so he do voodoo?

Ivy - No she do voodoo

Hyrd - No know voodoo

Lily - who do voodoo

Miko - me do voodoo
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-07-07, 07:46 PM		Pinks: Doo doo d-doo-doo.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-07-07, 10:06 PM		Sarah: I'm in, I guess.

Tirmek: You don't seem too sure of yourself.

Sarah: I just don't want to leave Elina alone...

Elina taps her on the shoulder and makes a few hand signals, indicating that she wants to go too.

Sarah: Are you absolutely sure? If anything comes up, there's no guarantee that we'd be able to cover for you.

Elina motions with her fists.

Sithis: I think she's saying that her physical prowess remains unhindered.

Elina: *nods*

Sarah: ...all right, you can come with us. Just stay near me, ok?

Elina: :D *wraps her arms around Lilly's neck and begins to snuggle*

Lilly: :eek: *ghurk* *choke*

Tirmek: ...he's coming too, isn't he?

Elina: *nods enthusiastically*

Tirmek: :doh: :nonono:

Sarah: *pathing* Maybe this'll do her some good. She hasn't really done anything to break routine since the incident.

Tirmek: :rolleyes: Still doesn't mean I have to like it.

OOC: Elina will get better at the speed of plot. By which I mean Charles and I are still working things out. By which i mean it's mostly figured out. By which I mean we started with an idea for point W, then point J, then Y, then E, ...you get the idea.

Just keep your pants on.

Homestar: :confused: Pants? Hummmmmmm...........

Yeah, chew on that one for a while. ;)
Paulon

02-07-07, 10:19 PM		Pinks: Doo doo d-doo-doo.

Mnah mnah!

Or depending on the script maybe, 'Phenomenon'.
DungeonJman

02-07-07, 10:24 PM		*is talking with John*

Nobby: What the heck is he doing?

*appearing out of nowhere*

Evil DungeonJ: Apparently, he and John are having a "lecture off" to see who can create the speech with the greatest enlightenment potential, factors being the message involved and ability to hold the audience's interest.

Nobby: *jumps back* How'd you get here?

Evil DungeonJ: I found a loophole stating that if i got another evil inclination to do my job for me, then he could hold my time, this goes back to a bar bet that Rose owed someone after his elvish tap water was switched with ale one night. I can't believe he actually stayed standing long enough to make the bet. As for how i know the factors.. *groans* when i came back here, i ended up arriving right near their discussion. To borrow slang from another universe, i was nearly driven "barmy" after listening for a minute.
urial angel of death

02-07-07, 10:33 PM		Kerrith: What are these pants you speak of?

Lilly: Girly-boy is wearing a skirt!

Kerrith: It's not a skirt; it's a robe!

Lilly: Sure it is.

Kerrith: i.h.h. I wonder if master will be able to handle the neo-kythons without me. Ah well I probably don't need to worry about it. What's the worst that could happen?

Lenneth: Due to ominous plot related diolog my brothers and I would like to get off the ship. Can we go with you guys?
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-08-07, 09:36 AM		Sithis: very well,we're leaving in a week, so gather all the equipment and provisions you wish to take.we'll be travelling mostly by flight, seing as this will be the fastest way to cover so much ground. If you cant fly natrually then you'll have to get your hands on some magical items or magic that can grant flight. I'll go over the details more on the day, but if you have any questions i'm willing to answer them.
rampant

02-08-07, 11:04 AM		Tirmek - Ok Sithis can bat swarm if nothing else, Sarah can fly and carry supplies....I think a carry kite (see races of the wild) would be best. Can Elina still fly? If not the Teiza will have to carry her, and the rest of us can take shifts in the kite's second spot.

Lily - Who put you in charge?

Tirmek - Sithis just showed me the gear he'd need, and I took a look at the stuff we needed to bring. Including a Kodachi and Buckler for Elina.

Sarah - :bigeyes:

Tirmek - No I'm not making her more stuff, I just filched them from storage. I don't think that without her powers she can go in without a better defensive rig.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-08-07, 03:08 PM		OORampant - This is too easy. Secret arts: Water bucket Technique!
Half-biscuit chieftain: GArrgle! Sugary goodness! Hyperactive!
(trans: Oh no! We must now unleash our secret weapon! Let loose the dumb kids cartoon!)

(somethin like this the Homsar show (http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail110.html))
Charles Phipps

02-08-07, 03:25 PM		Thorn: Ah ha! I have you now!

Lilly: What? You....

*WHAM*

Doog Jr: Doog Junior help Not-Lilly!

Thorn: Now that my twin is unconscious, it is time for me to take my brother's place to win over the heart of the fair Elina!

Miko: Just as long as Lilly and Elina aren't hurt.

Thorn: Err...sure...of course.

Miko: YAY! In the meantime I will care for Lilly in my home dimension!

*plane shifts with Lilly to Shevaresh*

Thorn: Now to go impersonate Lilly.

*Walks over to see Elina is playing with her dolls*

Thorn: Hello my dearest! *pulls out flowers* I have come to speak with you about the possibility of a romantic get together where we might commiscerate about our future together. Nevermind my now intelligent speech and dashing manner, they do not in any way imply I am not your suitor Lilly.

Elina: Boo?

Thorn: No no, don't speak my pet. Ours is a special evening that transcends mere words to define it. Merely, I ask you to wear this scandalously sexy outfit that will expose your middle AC to a critical hit from my poisoned dagger.....err.....allow you to be suitably beautiful.

*hands her a box with a dress in it*

Elina: :Blink Blink:

Thorn: In the meantime, I shall go
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-08-07, 04:17 PM		Silver: I work with the materials at hand. So sue me.
rampant

02-08-07, 04:17 PM		Teiza - *Bap*

Thorn - OW! Who the

Teiza - *glare*

Thorn - :gel:
-----------------------

Lily - AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Miko - What's wrong!?

Lily - SCARY DEMON CHILD!
------------------------------------------

Elina - Boo bwa boo

Dorvos - Hmmmmmm

Rashour - I feel like a blind man at an art museum.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-08-07, 04:39 PM		Sithis sits at his desk, he winces as he peels off the glove on his right hand and checks the rotting flesh beneath. he flexes the hand slowly, spreading the fingers out wide and then scrunching them up into a fist.
he was defintly regaining mobility, the salve he'd applied had defenitly stopped it deteraiting any further.
Sithis removed a vail of the salve from the shelf and applied it to his hand.

Sithis: (ihh) i hope Teiza can carry the Key, if not then im going to have to create some warded gloves. still, Lilly could prove a liability. at least Kerrith has some common sense.

Sithis sighed, he would have to work around that particular problem. Sithis felt the pain begin to numb as the salve seeped into cursed right hand.
Sithis cleaned the glove with a spell before replacing it.
Sithis rose and walked over to his padded coffin, he lay down and shut his eyes. he'd worry about the expidition after he'd slept.
rampant

02-08-07, 07:33 PM		Teiza - This thing is weird, creepy vibes, this thing is one energitic cesspool.

Tirmek - And that would be why you're the one handling it.

Teiza - :plotting: :evillaugh

Lily - I'm scared...even more sothan normal with her around.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-08-07, 09:37 PM		One of Sithis's bats delivers a note to Tirmek.

Tirmek: *reads* Oooo, interesting. I think I'll take that bet.

Thorn: *quietly from behind* Hi Tirmek.

Tirmek: Gah! Oh, Lilly. Just who I was looking for.

Thorn: Tirmek, do you notice anything different about me today?

Tirmek: Uh, you're sporting a goatee?

Thorn: Naw, I'm always doing that.

Tirmek: Ok, what?

Thorn: I'm standing on one foot! *does so*

Tirmek: :bored: Yeah, great. Ok, look. I'll give you half a Vampycake...if you can say something intelligent.

Thorn: What's that?

Tirmek: It's like a little cake with some, like, steam and sugar...

Thorn: No, no. The other one.

Tirmek: What, 'intelligent'?

Thorn: Yeah, yeah. Intellivision.

Tirmek: You know...something smart.

Thorn: I think I can do that. *raised eyebrow* What's in it for me?

Tirmek: *annoyed* Half a Vampycake!

Thorn: Ok, here goes-

Tirmek: No wait, put this stuff on. *hands him a lab coat, coke bottle glasses, and a test tube* It'll add to the illusion.

Thorn: *puts it on* Whoa! Check me out, Tirmek! I look a-smart!

Tirmek: :rolleyes: Ya sure do, stupid. Now say something.

Thorn: And I'm standing on one foot!

Tirmek: Come on, say something smart! You can do it!

Thorn: *dramatically* SCIENCE!

Tirmek: Uh..that's pretty good. Keep going!

Thorn: SCIENCE again! I said SCIENCE again!

Tirmek: Let's move away from science. Try math.

Thorn: *happliy* Plus two.

Tirmek: Ok, this isn't going-

Thorn: Hundred!

Tirmek: *groan* *whispers to himself* I need to get my hands on some of those Vampycakes! Maybe if I employ a little reverse psychology... If I ask a stupid enough question, I'll get an intelligent answer! *out loud* I say there, Lilly, butt's twelve by pies?

Thorn: Oh, yes! I got Tirmek to say something stupid! *triumphantly* The Vampycakes shall be MINE! *runs off*

Tirmek: What?! What the crap just happened?! Is it possible that I was just... *horrified* outsmarted by LILLY?! *shakes his fists in the air* I'LL GET YOU SITHIS!

-----

Sithis: :mad: You're a bastard, you know that?

Kithle: *speaking from the bat* That's Magnificent Bastard to you.
Charles Phipps

02-08-07, 09:57 PM		Goth Elina: You can't involve yourself with Lilly's evil seductive ways!

Succubus Elina: YAY! HE'S FINALLY MAKING HIS MOVE! WEEE!

Elina: Booo? *checks the sexy dress*

Elvish Elina: I do want to point out that the most likely scenario is that we're facing down not the intelligent but lovable paladin Lilly but his malicious Blackguard Wizard....

Rules Lawyer Elina: AHEM, it's Evil Cleric of War/Fighter/Sorcerer....

Elvish Elina: *sigh* Twin Thorn.

Goth Elina: Oh please, like Thorn could ever come up with something that smart. He's got huge Wisdom but abyssmal intelligence.

Orcish Elina: Elina like Not-Lilly! Elina want make him Puppy!

Elina: *starts changing*

Angel Elina: We must avoid compromising his Paladin like integrity!

Sarah Elina: Grrrr..arf!

*Sexy Dress wearing Elina walks along to go talk to Thorn*
rampant

02-08-07, 10:20 PM		Elina Sarah - Don't chew on the table legs...blah blah...don't chew on tirmek...blah blah blah...don't eat that its been on the floor...blah blah blah blah

Tirmek - Something wrong?

Sarah - *shakes head* No just a little distracted, *pecks tirmek on the cheek* mmmmmhhh cinnamon:D
-------------------------------------------------------------------

Sithis - Well?

Kithle - Well What?

Sithis - Hand it over.

Kithle - :rolleyes: Fine I keep it in the second corridor on the left.

Sithis - Ahem

Kithle - The password is NVB-1313
---------------------------------------

Sithis stalks the corridor, upon encountering a panel, He speaks the password.

A door opens to reveal...A horde of frenzied vampire wannabies!

Sithis - AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

H.o.F.V.W.s - BITE MEEEEEEEE!
----------------------------------------------

13 - Should havee realized The password meant New Vampire Breed, 13th son of a 13th son.

Kithle - *polishing his plaque* Don't mess with the best.
Charles Phipps

02-08-07, 10:48 PM		Shavarath

Lilly: You kidnapped me!

Miko: Yes I did!

Lilly: And brought me to....

Miko: Shavarath!

Lilly: Why does it look like High School?

Miko: What better representation for the perfect battleground?

Lilly: And the miniskirt Fuku?

Miko: I'm captain of the Shavarath High School Kendo Team!

Lilly: Wow, this may be too weird even for me.

Principle Kanatash: MIKO! You're late for class!

Lilly: THE HELL!?

Miko: Sorry Principle.

Principle Kanatash: I must dispatch a horde of Infernal Bugbears against you.

Narrator: FIGHT

*afterwards*

Lilly: I like this school already. It reminds me of how I became rivals with Tirmek.

Miko: Hmmm?

Lilly: Well it all started...

Flashback

The Dojo Stage from Street fighter II

*Tirmek is dressed as Ken while Lilly is dressed as Ryu*

Lilly: You killed our master, you team killing :censored: tard!

Tirmek: HAHHAAHHAAHAHA! HE WOULDN'T teach me the Tenkai not tay wammy and paid for it with his life!

Lilly: You'll pay for this!

Back to High School

Lilly: And little did I know...he was my half-brother.

Miko: What?

Lilly: Either that or I stayed up playing Nintendo too much last night.

Miko: Uhhh...

Lilly: Magalen is the big Thai kickboxer with one eye right?
rampant

02-08-07, 10:56 PM		Ketty - You're off tonight.

Feal-thas - What are you talking about?

Ketty - Your rythm, its shot. You're not fighting well.

Feal-thas - *sigh* we need to talk
Charles Phipps

02-08-07, 11:43 PM		Tirmek: I think Lilly has been replaced by Thorn.

*Tosses frizbee*

*Sarah catches it in her mouth*

Sarah: Hmmmm?

Tirmek: Nevermind, tummy rub time.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-09-07, 08:03 AM		We see Sithis, Speeding down a corridor. followed by a horde of Vamp wannabies.

Sithis: Get away from me you pasty freaks!

Sithis stops as the floor ends, he stares down into a giant casm in the deck.

Sithis: Crap.

He turns as the Vamp wannabies slow, walking towards him menacingly.

Sithis: you do realise that i could take you all out right?

Nerdy Vamp wanabie: yes, but in doing so youre bound to accidently use your level drain on one of us. causing us to rise as vampires.

Sithis: clever deduction. but did you ever count on this?

Sithis steps back into the casm, stretching out to slow his decent he gives a Nonchalant wave at the stunned Vamp wannabies before teleporting.
***

Feal-Thas: well... ahh (ihh) damn, this is harder than i thought. years of training, both mental and physical. and i just freeze up.

***
Naz'roth is sat in the great hall, currently enjoying a break from the paper work. As he raises a wine glass to his mouth, there's a flash of red light, a smell like sulfur and Somthing moveing very fast smashes crashes into the table with a shower of splinters.

Sithis: * muffled slightly * Damn.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-09-07, 08:09 AM		Orcish Elina: Elina like Not-Lilly! Elina want make him Puppy!
Silver: Or make puppy with him? ;)
13 - Should havee realized The password meant New Vampire Breed, 13th son of a 13th son.

Kithle - *polishing his plaque* Don't mess with the best.
13: Except it's not as obvious as you would wish it to believe.

Kithle: Pardon? :confused:

13: *long and boring :teach: about the nature of the sentient mind, the differences between individuals, the need to have prior knowledge when figuring out a code………all worthy of a lecture from DungeonJ or maybe even John*

Kithle: :twitch: Still…not…magnificent…

13: I ain't aimin' for magnificent. Means I have a wider range of possibilities. :P
DungeonJman

02-09-07, 10:13 AM		Rose: Wait, is it a trait of good aligned people to do nothing except improve their own selves instead of fighting evil?

DungeonJ: I tried to fight evil, but...

*switches to a sign with the words CAVE OF EVIL, all do-gooders must remain 10 ft away*

OOKaizer: *with paintbrush* You think this is okay?

OOUrial:*with a bunch of signs in his hands* :mad: Hey, we need the xp more than he does!
rampant

02-09-07, 03:30 PM		Ketty - Well?

Feal-thas - I..I...

Ketty - You're fumblemouthing like a ....love sick schoolboy. You..Me:OMG!

Feal-thas - Yes, I've fallen for you.

Ketty - I.. I .... Ahhhhhhhg!

Feal-thas - What's wrong?

Ketty - I need to think, I need space.

Feal-thas - I don't understand, why are you so worked up over this!

Ketty - I just need to think. *dissapear*
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-09-07, 03:38 PM		Feal-thas - I don't understand, why are you so worked up over this!

Ketty - I just need to think. *dissapear*
Silver: Yeah, and then 13 has to come in and make everything complicated. :mad:
rampant

02-09-07, 04:03 PM		Feal-thas - (leaning on the prow railing) What did I do wrong?

Satnak - Simple, you fell for a woman from a culture that only allows one marriage. If a spouse dies, thats it.

Feal-thas - But Toren brainwashed her, and used her as an assasin!

Satnak - Irrelevant as far as the laws arer concerned. Ketty knew the tradtions, and rules far better than I do. She can recite our geneaology all the way back to the Sage of Legacy.

Feal-thas - But she declared both families rogue herself.

Satnak - But she upholds as much as she can, its how she remembers our parents.

Feal-thas - What do I do?

Satnak - Dunno kid, Like I said I don't know all the rules myself, I was too young when it happened. I'd say you give her some space for a bit, but be ready when she comes back.

Feal-thas - She might break with tradition?

Satnak - Maybe....

Feal-thas - Keep going.

Satnak - More likely she's gonna skin you alive for this.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-09-07, 04:07 PM		Feal-thas - She might break with tradition?

Satnak - Maybe....

Feal-thas - Keep going.

Satnak - More likely she's gonna skin you alive for this.
OOcat: :eek:

Silver and Bunny are giving each other animé-lightening-stares.
rampant

02-09-07, 05:19 PM		Ketty - *sigh* why did he have to go and say that?:mad:

Tirmek - Because he cares about you mother, you are everything a warrior like Feal-thas admires. Tough, smart, and deadly, furthermore you like him too.

Ketty - You are too smart for your own good my son.

Tirmek - Sarah says that all the time. Usually when I'm trying to read, and she wants to play fetch.

Ketty - :rolleyes: kids today

Tirmek - Now I know the rules as well as you do, unlike you I just don't care.

Ketty - Keep rubbing my nose in that will you.

Tirmek - Look mom, these rules worked 200 years ago, maybe even 50 years ago. Now I know how hard you've tried to live your life by the codes set down by The Sage of Legacy, but its been more than 10,000 years since she died. Besides, he's not asking to marry you is he?

Ketty - Well no, but what if he wants children...

Tirmek - Mom, listen to me, we just snagged a loophole here.

Ketty - Yes that loophole was used by the 27th heir of Gourn, so he could be with his drow lover. But any children from our union would still be...hehehe you're right Tirmek I still think like we're part of the clans.

Tirmek - What's left of them: The Gourn, the Barok, the Tingros, the Blazek, and the Voreth are extinct. The Coilen were declared a rogue clan after the sage wars, and due to abuse ofpower by the Sirinon, the Borisheel, and the Tharmis are also Rogue clans.

Ketty - I've watched the fall of my people.

Tirmek - Oh stop that! You are here now! Look at your sister, she is bringing up a new people. You have to accept that the society that you once belonged to is no more. If you try to hold onto it you are going to end up like the Sirinon.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-09-07, 05:46 PM		Tirmek - ………The Gourn, the Barok, the Tingros, the Blazek, and the Voreth are extinct.
Bunny: And good riddence, I say. What, do you super-warriors name each other based on drunken dares?

Silver: I thought you didn't give a damn so long as they can kill quickly.

Bunny: Sure, but Nalfein isn't commentary, so someone has to do Black Mage.
rampant

02-09-07, 05:52 PM		OORampant - How did you know the Sage was drunk when she named them?
Paulon

02-09-07, 06:01 PM		OOPaulon: Maybe because they're simple, short, and silly sounding? If one of them had been named the 'Antidisestablishmentarianism' or similar there would have been no doubt of sobriety. I doubt someone who's drunk could pronounce that. :P
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-09-07, 06:05 PM		OORampant - How did you know the Sage was drunk when she named them?
OOcat: She wasn't a dark elf, was she?
rampant

02-09-07, 07:57 PM		OOC: Just one of the first half-elves. The big thing is she loved booze, so she would celebrate the end of each pregnancy by over indulging to make up for the long stretch of enforced sobriety.
Charles Phipps

02-09-07, 08:39 PM		OOC: Just one of the first half-elves. The big thing is she loved booze, so she would celebrate the end of each pregnancy by over indulging to make up for the long stretch of enforced sobriety.

Jarlot: Which is stolen from Dol Dornmas!

Rose: Dol Dornmas is based on half-elvish holidays of Arrahnukkah!

Jarlot: Quiet! Your halfish religion killed our Lord!

Rose: It's a baby cooking over floodlights in a wooden manger!

Jarlot: Dol Dornluyah!
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-09-07, 08:58 PM		OOC: Just one of the first half-elves. The big thing is she loved booze, so she would celebrate the end of each pregnancy by over indulging to make up for the long stretch of enforced sobriety.
OOC: Either you're really good at playing along, or you haven't seen this:
http://www.nuklearpower.com/daily.php?date=030621
rampant

02-09-07, 09:40 PM		OOC: I'm ashamed to say I'd completely forgotten about that. But it would have helped if The clans were half-drow.
----------------------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Ahehem

Feal-thas - O great I don't even rate ketty killing me herself.

Tirmek - Shut up Lizard! Now Ahem, The lady Ketty D'Tharmis wishes an audience with your personage immediatley. I would not advise moving slowly.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-09-07, 10:06 PM		OOC: Just one of the first half-elves. The big thing is she loved booze, so she would celebrate the end of each pregnancy by over indulging to make up for the long stretch of enforced sobriety.Terra: Funny, that's quite a lot like what we did. Only with sex instead of drinking.

Rose: :bored: And this is different from your normal activity how?

Lisa: More.

Rose: :uh-huh: How, exactly, is that possible? ...wait, don't tell me.

Lisa: :D It does wonders to restore the figure.

Silver: My new and freshly updated patented exercise plan. Now on it's...lets see...ten millionth year atop the best seller list.

Rose: :rolleyes: Why am I not surprised?
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-09-07, 10:07 PM		OOC: I'm ashamed to say I'd completely forgotten about that. But it would have helped if The clans were half-drow.
OOC: For my part I would still have come up with something mocking them, that was just convenient. (Though I really do understand how hard it is to come up with fictional names.)
Tirmek - ……I would not advise moving slowly.
Silver: Of course, moving quickly is also ill-advised. :D
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-09-07, 10:12 PM		Silver: My new and freshly updated patented exercise plan. Now on it's...lets see...ten millionth year atop the best seller list.
OOC: You get a :lightbulb award for intelligently mocking real life.
rampant

02-10-07, 12:19 AM		Lily and Elina ride Buttercup in the forward center of the formation.

Sithis is leading point.

Sarah and Teiza are hauling the cargo kite, Teiza is also holding the crystal staff.

Miko and Tirmek are to the rear left and right respectively.

Teiza - I think I almost got this thing figured out. *points it at a formation of geese*

Geese - hnnn-

Teiza - *catchcatchcatchcatchcatchcatchcatch* Anyone else want some?

Sarah - Yeah tosse me a few.
luna18moon

02-10-07, 12:51 AM		Brea is sleeping below decks, in a secret tunnel between two rooms. Rip and Tear show up, sneaking along so she doesn't wake up.
Rip: (telepathically to Tear) It'll probably be easier this way.
They settle down next to her and begin to probe her mind. Suddenly, they are transported to a big, open field that has a tinge of darkness to it. Their telepathy shuts off, and a young cat appears out of nowhere.
Rip: Who...
He waits for Tear to finish the sentence, but realizes he can't.
Rip: ...are you?
Cat: I have no name, but you may call me Brea, if you must. I was bound by Salea to hold together her soul. I hate keeping her bound like this, but unless the focus is replaced...
Tear: Her psyche will fall apart if you let go. You keep her powers bound because she might try to free you without understanding the consequences.
Brea: Exactly. I... there are no words in your language that describe my nature and other things I speak of exactly, but I will try. Salea has been working with souls for too long. She was so frustrated with the failure of her experiments that she made a deal with a soul fiend, a fiend that manipulates the souls of celestials. She must have invoked him in the spell, because here I am. I am a felinal, a race of celestials related to housecats.
Rip. I'm sorry. We gave her the fomula...
Brea: Hush. I am glad it happened now. When you return, could you erase knowledge of her pact from her mind and the formula, replacing the focus with a small crocodile tear?
Rip: We will.
Brea smiles, and the field dissipates. Rip and Tear carry out their promise as quickly as possible, and return to their examination of Brea.
Rip: I know a good focus.
Tear: Shred.
They smile, and tie her soul to her thoughts of Shred. They see an image of Brea the felinal. She smiles.
Brea F: Thank you.

Elsewhere:
Mittens and Nashvir are making out.
Mittens: :D It rocks to have a boyfriend most people can't see.
rampant

02-10-07, 02:48 AM		Ketty stands across the room shrouded in shadows.

Ketty - You wish to be with me.

Feal-thas - Thats putting it rather plainly.

Ketty - I am not a complicated person. I do what I think is best for my family. You are asking to be a part of that family. Simple as that.

Feal-thas - You're being a little more direct than I am comfortable with. Especially considering your son has been making sure to work with his collection of dragonhides where I can see him.

Ketty - Subtle he is not, I'm not sure if that is his weakness or strength.

Feal-thas - Alright then lets try the direct approach, I'm falling for you. I respect your son for being the cunning warrior he is, but I doubt I could ever consider him my son.

Ketty - He neither needs nor wants that from you. Frankly, it would be inappropriate for you to try, but he does change the equation for us.

Feal-thas - How so?

Ketty - He is my heir, he will wield the Rose when the time comes. He will be Patriarch upon my passing. Any children from our union will be expected to respect that, just as if he was their full-brother.

Feal-thas - As long as its clear that that is same you would expect of them if they were Tirmek's true siblings.

Ketty - If Tirmek had a sibling then yes said sibling would be expected to understand that Tirmek is the heir.

Feal-thas - (i.h.h. She wants assurance that I'm not trying to supplant Tirmek in favor of my own get....
----------------------------------------

OOC: Fangblade?
Charles Phipps

02-10-07, 07:12 AM		Sarah: Thank you for starting my ninja trailer Sensei.

Quistis: I admit, this is the first time I've ever started instructing a little girl let alone a little werewolf girl in the arts of ninjitsu.

Sarah: Hai!

Quistis: My older sister Lisa has been very lucky to have a little girl like you.

Sarah: I admit, it's fun having someone whose not mom around for a bit but I still feel I can trust. There's a lot of things I'm not comfortable talking about.

Quistis: Like sex?

Sarah: I'm frightened of anything mom might tell me....but not that. Still, I'm unsure how to broach it with you.

Quistis: Would you do it for a Sarah snack?

*pulls out a small wolf treat looking biscuit*

Sarah: No!

Quistis: How about TWO Sarah snacks?

*Sarah shudders a bit*

Sarah: It's wrong of you to exploit my addiction like that. You know what happened to Terra's animal companion's brother.

*she gestures over to Scooby who shakes with the chills while his wide eyes glare madly about*

Quistis: It's harmless fun. I even give some to Lilly. He's taken to growing the plant that's contained within though for his own use.

*Quistis gestures over to Lilly as he's in a Hawaiian shirt with a Rastafaran cap while a heavy cloud of smoke comes from his room, Ivy's full plate is decorated in psycadelic colors, and they're both carrying a pizza*

Sarah: Well if Lilly does it then it can't be harmful!

Quistis: Good to know.

*Reggae music starts playing from Lilly's room and hordes of relentless giggling at cartoons*

*Sarah scarfs down her 'special plant brownies'*

Sarah: MMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmm!

*Sarah's tail sticks out and she floats in the air*

Terra: Quistis!

Quistis: It's medicinal! I swear!

Terra: I don't want my daughter listening to Cyprus Hill! Now stop having her gorge on Druid holy plants and stick to teaching her Ninjitsu like you taught the Pontiff!

Quistis: Yes ma'am.

*Quistis turns back to find Sarah in a brightly colored shirt herself and shades*

Sarah: Ooooooooo!

Quistis: Now that you're suitably stoned, are you hiding anything from me Sarah?

Sarah: :giggle:

Quistis: It's no use denying it if you are.

Sarah: Colors are pretty!

Quistis: Maybe two Sarah snacks were too many. However will I find out the source of your nightmares?

*Sarah bounces over and starts jamming to Lilly playing the saxaphone*

***

Tirmek: Damnit, I think I'll need to go rescue Lilly.

Maladren: Isn't Lilly completely high over there?

Tirmek: No, that's Joke Lilly. He's much like Rose in that he appears whenever Lilly is needed for a joke despite being continuity impossible.

Maladren: Oh.

Tirmek: No, I'm more concerned about the Lilly over there.

Maladren: The one helping Jarlot plot world domination?

Tirmek: That's the one, the Evil Cleric of War/Fighter.

Maladren: Wouldn't a black guard of war be more economical?

Tirmek:....let's not touch on that for now. We've got to get Lilly back.

Maladren: You hate Lilly with the fire of a thousand suns.

Tirmek: Yes, but Lilly keeps Elina from going over to the Dark Side. In which THAT would result in the continent becoming a Hell on Earth which *I* have to live in. Furthermore, it would make Sarah unhappy.

Maladren: Whoop shhh!

Tirmek: You did not just make that noise.

Maladren: Sorry sir.

Tirmek: I also don't completely trust the motives of Lisa's cousin. She reaks of being a....Priestess of Arrawai.

Maladren: NO! THE COOKIEE BAKING PRIETESSES OF THE EARTH!

Tirmek: Yes.

Maladren: The one who claim to be witches and do magic despite being obviously a religion?

Tirmek: That's the one.

Maladren: And often have inaccurate views about historical incidents of persec...

Tirmek: YES! THAT ONE! I don't want Sarah getting involved in....Arricca.

Maladren: One Aerith is bad enough.

Tirmek: She's high on life....Sarah is just....

*Tirmek looks over at her while she is eating a whole pizza with Joke Lilly*

Tirmek: Right, let's go save Lilly.

***

Outside High School Hell as the pair sneak out the window

Lilly: I have survived high school....sorta.

Miko: We're consigned to eternal detention for that Cherry Suicide Bombing.

Lilly: How was I supposed to know I'd survive?

Miko: In any case, our only hope to get out of this situation is to sneak aboard a Chaos Ship and fly it back to Khovaire.

Lilly: Well obviously that requires my stunning brilliance.

Ten Minutes later

Miko: Why am I dressed as Rikku?

Lilly: Because I'm Tidus and I found Rikku cuter.

Miko: And....

Doog II: Doog is Leprechaun!

Lilly: ....I didn't ask him to dress up like that.

*An Air ship then lands beside them*

Lilly: GASP! It's....you!

Miko: You're the Captain!?

Chuck Norris: I've come to save you kids.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-10-07, 08:03 AM		Feal-Thas: (ihh) I dont seek to surplant Tirmek. we dont seek Political power. but how can i assure her of that?

Feal-Thas removes a dagger from his belt and slits it across his right palm. clenching his fist so the blood drips between his fingers he brings his fist above his heart.

Feal-Thas: I swear to you on the blood of my people and the spirits of my Ancestors, that I do not seek to surplant Tirmek as the rightful heir to your house.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-10-07, 09:08 AM		OOcat: Say, who's purview do drugs fall under?

Bunny: Are they deadly?

OOcat: No.

13: Do they have hard-to-pronounce names and side-effects so nasty sounding that you wonder why people don't just stick with the original ailement?

OOcat: No.

Silver: Do they—

OOcat: No.

Bunny: In other news some people are about to die.

Silver: Some people are always :rolleyes: about to die.

Bunny: Yeah, but now Chuck Norris's showed up.

Silver: Just leave me some fiends. In related news, we now get to find out whether half-dragons are as inventive as real dragons.
Charles Phipps

02-10-07, 09:20 AM		These drugs fall under Silver.

Silver: KEEP LILLY AND SARAH AWAY FROM ONE ANOTHER!

Wow, never thought we'd see that result.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-10-07, 10:04 AM		13: *happy whistling*

OOcat: :bored: What did you do now?

Brea: Cat? I'm a kittycat. And I dance dance dance and I dance dance dance.……etc.
(see this Kitty-Cat Dance (http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/kittycat.php))

13: You know that fake memory Rip and Tear put in her mind? :devil:
rampant

02-10-07, 11:58 AM		Ketty - Good, now take off your pants!

Feal-thas - Hold on a minute there

Ketty - I SAID STRIP! I'ts been more than a decade for me, now drop the pants!

Silver - FINALLY!
luna18moon

02-10-07, 01:30 PM		OOC: What fake memory?
IC:
Shred is still where Rip and Tear left him.
Shred: (i.h.h.) Why did they just set me up with a deal like that? I didn't even know she existed.

Elsewhere:
Brea: *yawn* What a nice nap. *realizes something* Where'd that presence go? I feel... more confident and powerful.
Rip: Hmm... You would make a good telepath, but...
Brea: I want to be a Soulknife.
Tear: :confused: Why?
Rip: Both, I figure. Read your opponents thoughts and stab them with a mindblade.
Brea: Yes. I need to be able to fight if I want to stay alive on this ship.
Tear: Very well.
One week later:
Brea
Rogue 1/Soulknife 9/Psibond Agent 6
Emerging from the training Rip and Tear gave her, Brea has become an accomplished spy and fighter. She's now rather confident, but still acts shy when it suits her purposes and around Shred.
rampant

02-10-07, 02:04 PM		Sithis - Would you please move it, I'm tired of stopping every hour so you can nap off whatever you just ate.

TEiza - fine:rolleyes:
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-10-07, 02:15 PM		13: Ah, I guess I misread "crocodile tear" as a fake memory. Never mind.

Brea: So are you going to let me stop doing this—and I meow meow meow……

13: Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm no.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-10-07, 04:00 PM		Sithis - Would you please move it, I'm tired of stopping every hour so you can nap off whatever you just ate.

TEiza - fine:rolleyes:

Sithis: and would you please stop messing around with that thing *gestures to the key* i would rather not have to scrape up the remains of whom ever gets accidently hit with it. (ihh) unless its Lilly, which would be a blessing for all of us...
rampant

02-10-07, 05:38 PM		Feal-thas, looking drained of all life, finally emerges into the sunlight.

Tara - Where have you been the last month?!

Feal-thas - hhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Tirmek - Well I guess I don't have to make him into boots...assuming he survives this.

Silver - :D

13 - :D

Bunny - (whispering into ketty's ear) Just one more go, if you can keep going so can he, come its been almost 14 long years, you still have so much to make up for.

Silver - Huh?

Bunny - You honestly think he'll survive another round?

Silver - And the world makes no sense again.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-10-07, 05:58 PM		Silver - And the world makes no sense again.
13: Just the way I like it.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-10-07, 06:32 PM		The party lands upon a small section of rock jutting out of the sea.

Lilly: this is it? all that travel and we come to see a patch of ocean!

Sithis: *smiling* hardly. Teiza, aim the Key where im point.

Sithis Points ahead of them. Teiza raises the rod, and nothing happens.
there's a long pause.

Sithis: that should have worked....

Tirmek: perhaps we're in the wrong area?

Sarah: or pehaps we're missing somthing. like a trigger word.

Sithis ponders for a moment, hand going down to the amulate around his neck. he removes it and stares at it for a moment.

Sithis: (ihh) could i have been wrong? is this the wrong area? have i wasted all this time and effort? NO. i shall not fail. I will not be defeated. what did the journel state? " Raise the key towards the north face of the rock, check, then activate the Key, check, making sure the beam strikes the heartstone... wait. heart stone? Of course!

Sithis: Teiza, when i throw the Hearstone-

Teiza: what?

Sithis: this amulate. when i throw it, hit it with the Key's energy strike. alright?

Sithis hurls the Heart Stone, as it arcs in the air a beam of crimson energy emits from the key. striking it dead centre. The HeartStone, surrounded in crimson energy Halts in the air. The Heartstone begins to glow. brighter and brighter. runes glisten in the air around it, the HeartStone moves higher into the air, sending out a glistening bolt of crimson light. the bolt strikes somthing. and An Island shimmers into view.

for some reason the air becomes warmer. as if the cold harsh weather of Frostfell doesnt exist. on the island tropical forests are in bloom. their foliage lush and healthy, towering above the forests is a single spire. its form seemed to be made of some kind of glittering blue crystal, shining in the light of day. The Heartstone reappeared in Sithis's hand.

Sithis: well. that was a tad more dramatic than i expected...
Charles Phipps

02-10-07, 07:07 PM		Ninja School

Quistis: Now Sarah, have you removed all of the bells from the dummy without ringing one?

Sarah: But that'll take hours!

Quistis: You must do it in minutes.

Sarah: This sucks.

*Quistis pulls out a newspaper and lightly waps Sarah on the nose*

Quistis: Bad! Bad!

*Sarah feels her nose and wags her tail*

Quistis: Now sit girl and wait until I tell you to move again.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-10-07, 07:20 PM		Quistis: Now Sarah, have you removed all of the bells from the dummy without ringing one?
While Quistis is lecturing Sarah, a large, squirrel-like humanoid sneaks in and take all the bells off the dummy without making a sound.

When Quistis turns her back for one moment, as is the way of lectures, the squirrel-thing hands the bells to Sarah, gives her a wink, then disappears. When Quistis turns back around Sarah is holding all the bells.

Sarah: Can I move now?
Charles Phipps

02-10-07, 07:35 PM		Quistis: Now you get your treat.

Sarah: But I...

Quistis: Yes, your yummy treat.

*pulls a Sarah snack*

Sarah: No thanks, really! I'm trying to cut back.

Quistis: EAT IT.

Sarah: *chomp chomp chew*

*Sarah suddenly gets wide eyed and starts spinning around a bit*

Terra: How's training coming?

Quistis: Very well thank you!
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-10-07, 07:54 PM		While Quistis is talking with Terra, the squirrel-thing steals all his Sarah snacks, replacing them with a card that says [WARNING: KAIZER, DO NOT READ THIS] "Doo doo d-doodoo".
Kaizer_Ryu

02-10-07, 08:23 PM		13: Ever notice how warnings instictively make someone want to read/do whatever is being warned against? :devil:

OOKaizer: *after reading the note* NOO-! :bored: Meh. The one good thing about head colds is it's hard to get songs stuck in your head.

But it hurts to yell... :weep:
Charles Phipps

02-10-07, 08:50 PM		OOC: And FYI, Quistis is an FF8 character and Lisa's kid sister.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-10-07, 09:08 PM		OOC: And FYI, Quistis is an FF8 character
OOC: My info ends at FFVI.
and Lisa's kid sister.
I should be embarassed. But it's not the first time.

Lucky: I'll say.
rampant

02-10-07, 09:25 PM		Feal-thas - neeeeed foooooooood
-------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Ok thenI say we stick together until we have abetter idea of the terrain, and a base camp established.

Lily - Who died and made you king?

Elina - *Smack*

Lily - Ouch! But you like me now.

Sarah - She stills knows when you're being an idiot.
ratslinky

02-10-07, 09:35 PM		Esabar: No no you don't do it like that you do it like this *Casts Bulls strength and Divine Favor and Bless and well you get the idea* Now *SMACK* *Lilly falls unconscious*

Gaz: Ooh can I have a go *SMACK* Man that is the best feeling I have ever had Tirmek you should try it it's great for getting rid of stress
rampant

02-10-07, 10:29 PM		Tirmek - As much fun as that is we need him back up and running. *Transfer Elder spirit meld*

Lily - Oh great you healed me.

Tirmek - Yes, get back in formation.

Lily - Razzafragging drill sargeant.

Tirmek - *return elder spirit meld* Company stagger formation, front ranks spread out and take to the skies. Miko You and I will be taking the kite this leg.

Miko - Darnit!

Tirmek - Elina you and buttercup take point with Sithis. Lily Teiza has a meld that will let you work under water. You two are our aquatic scouts, report back immediatly if something comes up. Esabar, Gaz, and Marenth I need you three to take up formation above. Wheel around and keep everyone in site. Move out people!
Kaizer_Ryu

02-11-07, 12:32 AM		Nina: While family togetherness is all well and good, Oni-chan, I think this is taking it a little too literally.

Scias: N-n-n-n..........not w-w-w-what I i-i-i-intended.

Deis: :D Sucks to be you guys.

Momo: :mad: Sure, rub it in that Levitate works in this situation. You could cast in on us, you know?

Deis: Now where's the fun in that? :devil:

The view zooms out to show Momo and Nina mysteriously stuck to Scias, along with the various (and, thankfully, Spartan) non-bolted down furnishings of the room, as they float in mid air. Deis stands on the ceiling looking rather amused with the entire situation.

Momo: Did you have to steal the gravity?

Scias: :embarrass

Nina: He said he didn't mean it...

Momo: I just never expected him to take that phrase so literally.

*FLASH*

Momo: :mad: Dammit, sis, stop taking photos!

Deis: Why? Sarah ne-chan and Elina ne-chan need to see this when they get back. :evillaugh

Nina: Can't you just give the gravity back?

Scias: I c-c-c-can't m-m-m-m-m..............................move my h-h-h-h........................hands yet.

*about half an hour later*

The three and the furnishings are covered in a rainbow of colors.

Chalky: *also floating* *nods approvingly* Not bad.

Deis: :D Did I mention the Sovereign Glue base?

Momo: *angry pom*

Nina: :( Did you have to cast Web, too?

Deis: Yes. Yes I did.

Chalky: I'm surprised you didn't coat them in feathers.

Deis: :schemes: Dispel

Chalky: :eek: *falls against the still wet paint*

Deis: That's why I brought this! *pulls a pillow out of her bag of holding* *RIP*

Scias: C-c-c-c-c....................................... ....crap.
ratslinky

02-11-07, 01:54 AM		Esabar: (i.h.h) Yeah like I'm gonna take orders from Tirmek I know just as much about tactics as him. And this is my first chance to see ancients relics.

Gaz: (i.h.h) Well normally I'd follow Tirmek's orders but you have been waiting for this for a long time so ok. *Casts persistent image* (Out Loud) Hey Mareth want to come down for a look at the city don't worry about guarding this area Es has cast Alarm and a couple of other waring spells and I've put up some illusions of us so we can go in.

Mareth: Sure Gaz

*Gaz and Mareth both teleport down into the depths of the city and activate their rings of invisibility*
Kaizer_Ryu

02-11-07, 02:20 AM		*after Gaz/Esabar and Mareth leave*

Sarah: Ok...wow, just wow.

Elina: :confused:

Sarah: Esabar clams to know about strategy and the like, but she goes and forgets one of the cardinal rules. "A ship cannot have two captains."

Lilly: Um...I hate to break it to you, but we're not on a ship.

Teiza: :doh: She means that a group needs one leader in order to function properly. An unclear command structure is a sure way to get yourself and those around you killed in crisis situations.

Sithis: *off to the side drawing small circles in the ground while pouting* :( This is my quest. I invited you along.

Sarah: If the magic present in that Key is any indication of what's in store, we can't just go off and do our own thing if we feel like it.

Miko: :twitch: Sarah...using strategy?

Sarah: Pack hunting instincts and my boyfriend won't scratch my ears unless I work on my weaker points. Namely finding a strategy other than "hit it till it dies".

Tirmek: It works, doesn't it? ;)
ratslinky

02-11-07, 02:42 AM		OORatslinky: She does know about strategy but her weak point is that all reason goes out the door when some really good knowledge is their and Gaz follows her lead cause she's the one who know strategy
rampant

02-11-07, 02:53 AM		OOC: Talk about your vicious cycles.

Rose - Ok now why would anyone enchant a vehicle with a weapon enhancement?

OORampan - He's joking right?

Zella - Sometimes I wonder.
---------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Anyway we need to stick close. skritchy skritchy

Sarah - OOooooooooh

Lily - Are you suggesting we just let them go?

Tirmek - Indeed, forcing a round Gaz into a sqaure hole is bad news. Also I have an adrenaline triggered two way signal link with Marenth. She at least was smart enough to make sure we could stay in contact. I'm gonna have a long talk with Esabar and Gaz later. Sithis lets get moving, now that we're on the ground again Lily you're behind Sithis. If anything tries any funny business Charge through Sithis, he'll be dispersing into bat form to give you cover. Elina dismount I want You and Sarah Covering the rear. Sarah focus on energitics since Elina's still having trouble with that. Miko you and i will be between the groups so we don't get seperated. Stay in sight of your partner, and either Miko or myself, Miko you and I need to stay in sight of both groups and ensure communication up and down the chain understood? Yes, Good.

Teiza - What about me?

Tirmek - You are the heavy in forward group. Hang back with Lily, but let him do the noise making. You do your best work when the other side doesn't realize that you exist.
ratslinky

02-11-07, 03:09 AM		OORatslinky: The scene that follows was drawn from a trailer for Aliens vs. Predators any discrepancies come from the fact that I haven't seen said trailer in over a year.

IC:

Esabar: Amazing the language here is really old I haven't seen anything like it before

Mareth: I have. Most of it I can't read but this bit here its in an ancient draconic and if you translate it into common it basically means sacrificial chamber.

*suddenly the stone doors slam down cutting off any escape*

Gaz: What chamber did you say this was Mareth?

Esabar: Seriously do you only look at the fights on the FF and for your information she said sacrificial chamber

Gaz: Okay lets get out of here *Uses his innate teleporting it fails to work* Um I think we have a problem

OORatslinky: I'll do some more later just remember that there is no way in or out via magic and that the doors and walls are magically reinforced to resist all forms of attack
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-11-07, 09:13 AM		Sithis scanned the foliage as he moved, taking in details, there was a faint feel of magic in the area. nothing strong... but a residiual energy. The foliage was thick, almost unnatrually thick.
Sithis also had a feel of somthing... unnatural about this place. Sithis scowled as he paused for Lilly to keep up. the lumbering oath was more of a hinderance than an advantage at this point... but at least he could be relyed upon to cause large amounts of damage in a battle situation.

Once Lilly had caught up he pushed through the tree's once more, and emerged in a clearing. all around the clearing in a circle stones where set, their faces carved with one Sigil each. Sithis Cast his eyes up at the sky, the sun was setting. they'd need to rest anyway.
Sithis stepped forwards, but instead of the graceful movement he expected he ended up tripping on somthing. Sithis landed flat on his face.

Lilly: *chuckle* well there goes the famous vampire gra-

Lilly's voice halted. Sithis pulled himself to his feet and turned, Lilly stopping talking for more than ten seconds could be counted as a blessing. but somthing felt ... wrong.
Lilly stood stock still, his face ashen his eyes wide.

Sithis: Lilly, this is no time for games.

Lilly: *speaking in a whisper* bones.... Sithis... your standing on bones...

Sithis: what? i dont see any-

he looked down, only then seeing the bones that lay beneath the grass.
there where hundreds of them. Sithis stepped back... somthing about them made him feel Nauseous. they where wrong. very very wrong.
And then he could hear them. The voices. whispered chanting, sylables that Sithis couldnt comprehend ...
and then the stones glowed. Sithis then Lost Contact with Gaz and their group. as if they didnt exist....

the stones glowed with a dark red light. and Sithis felt a sudden influx in Negative energy... a cord began to strike in him as the whispered chant grew louder and louder. the bones became outlined in Red light as they rose, forming into humanoid shapes.
And then The shield closed over the Island, Cutting off all retreat.
Only now did Sithis see that the bones where engraved with runes, in the skeletal eyesockets of the undead red light shined. the runes about thier forms began to glow. in each of their hands archaic weapons and armour formed from glittering energy.

They walked forwards, Sithis stepped back, walking into Lilly. More of them began to rise as the others charged, the red pinpoints of eyes glittering with unholy malice...
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-11-07, 09:48 AM		Dancing among the skeletons can be seen a pair of black rabbit ears, tied up with various leather ribbons and feathers.

Bunny: Ooga unga chiga waha! Ooga unga chiga waha!…………………Why are you all looking like that? :confused: It's my job.
rampant

02-11-07, 02:48 PM		Lily - Haaaaaaaaaa!

Sithis disperses into swarm form, as Lily and Buttercup plow through the bats, they stirke before the forward ranks can respond.

Miko - Oiy Tirmek Get your girlfriend in here, its getting rough!

Tirmek - Ok Elina remember the kodachi is stronger than it looks, those things are made for defense.

Sarah - Raaaaaah!

Miko - I feel sorry for the skeletons.

Sarah blitzes down to take the undead from the left. As she leaps into the first one her gauntlet ignites. The first skeleton atttempts to raise its sheild.

Sarah accelerates in midair and streaks past the walking deadman.

Time stands still.

The skeleton warrior is consumed by a roaring fire that chars it to ash.

Tirmek - See the energy strike feature on those things comes in handy.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
On the right flank

A skeleton warior is pulled beneath the earth by a mass of onxy tendrils.

And then another.

And again.

Bunny - Now thats just boring.

Skeleton in the dirt - Ahhhhhh noooooo she's breaking my bones and eating the marrow while i watch!

Bunny - (puts on a hat that says : Teiza's #1 Fan)
Charles Phipps

02-11-07, 04:53 PM		OOC: BTW, I really like this adventure. I just wanted to comment n that to you guys.
DungeonJman

02-11-07, 05:06 PM		*on the Forgotten Freedom*

OODungeonJ: Pardon me, Quistis is it?

Quistis: Yes. *turns to Lisa* Ok, so how many of these E.B.N.E.'s on your ship are polite?

Lisa: Well, this one is usually not so bad, but i think the degree that your referring to is because his evil's been removed, making him go :looloo:

OODungeonJ: Anyway, i'm sorry to inform you that i am hear to warn you, because you have broken the law?

Quistis: :confused: warn?

OODungeonJ: Well it wouldn't be very nice to arrest someone for a drug crime without a warning, would it?

Quistis: I guess... wait, law? what law? I didn't hear of any law! :shifty:

OODungeonJ: *sighs and takes out a book called "Laws for Your Reality" and another which reads "Laws for My Reality" * Fine, which book do you want the proof in, the one that applies to you made by sort-of-corrupt people, or the one that applies less to you made by honest people?
Kaizer_Ryu

02-11-07, 05:21 PM		Quistis: How about this one? *pulls out a book entitled "I'm aboard the Forgotten Freedom, it was funny, and the laws of my country (Thrane) have nothing against the use of Sarah Snacks."*

Lisa: I'm afraid the Law states you have no case against her, considering neither her location at the time of said incident nor her citizenship allow her to be charged with anything. Like it or not, your world's laws don't apply to us. :P However, on that note: *thwack*

Quistis: Ow...

Lisa: Stop giving her those things.
Charles Phipps

02-11-07, 05:58 PM		Rose: *walks onto screen* And with that, I'd like to address the audience directly.

*Sarah walks out in a cute widdle pink dress*

Rose: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don't overmedicate your wolf girls.

*Sarah looks pitifully at the screen*

*a man in a business suit walks over to Rose, whispers in his ear*

Rose: Really? How much?

*The man in the business suit hands over a bag of gold coins*

Rose: Except, of course in the case of legitimate pharmaseuticals like BIG DRUGStm!

Sarah: Hmmmm?

*Rose puts on Big Drugstm ball cap and a group of dancing girls come out wearing jackets with the name*

*Ice Ice Baby starts playing*

Rose: Makers of such products like Jumpagra and for your wolfgirls, FOCUSYN!

*stuffs some pills into Sarah's mouth*

Sarah: Woahhhhh

*starts jamming with the honeys*
Charles Phipps

02-11-07, 06:01 PM		Quistis: How about this one? *pulls out a book entitled "I'm aboard the Forgotten Freedom, it was funny, and the laws of my country (Thrane) have nothing against the use of Sarah Snacks."*

Lisa: I'm afraid the Law states you have no case against her, considering neither her location at the time of said incident nor her citizenship allow her to be charged with anything. Like it or not, your world's laws don't apply to us. :P However, on that note: *thwack*

Quistis: Ow...

Lisa: Stop giving her those things.

:pint: for a great coda to the Sarah Snack plotline ;-)

DungeonJman, please take one too. Your legalese is very funny there.
DungeonJman

02-11-07, 06:03 PM		*throws the book of rules for their reality away*

Meh, the goal is not to enforce the law in this case, although it would have been nice, but to help people, considering that the point of the message got across, regardless of who did what, and in what form it came, my work is done.

*walks away, while the Evil DungeonJ is sobbing in a corner*

Evil DungeonJ: :weep: It's not fair nor right!

DungeonJ: You're just saying that because you can't turn anyone to evil, but regardless, i hope that you cheer up. Here, have a book and an apple *hands him the book of laws in my reality and an apple*

Evil DungeonJ: I'm your evil inclination, i've read that book looking for loopholes a thousand times! :mad:

*bites the apple, before his eyes widen and spits it out*

This is one of those apple's that your good side tried giving me before, isn't it?

OODungeonJ: Alright, if it will really make you happy, i don't 100% approve of it, but you can beat up Rose.

*Evil DungeonJ then runs and when OOdungeonJ is out of earshot, gives the :evillaugh:*

Rose: Hey, you can't do this! I have rights too! Oh crud.

AAAAH!

Evil DungeonJ: Anyone want to see what Rose's brain looks like before i douse it in cola and put it back in? What? Oh, that. I know battery acid would be better, but then his brain wouldn't work any more, so i wouldn't waste time putting it back in.
rampant

02-11-07, 06:45 PM		Ketty - Were is my dragon.

Tara - Recovering in the intensive care unit after that marathon you put him through.

Ketty - How soon will he be ready?

Tara - Just need get his nutrient levels out of the red. From now on remmeber to feed and water him.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-11-07, 07:38 PM		In Terrek's Head.

after seeing (through Scrying) what condition Feal-Thas is in.

Sa'vor: Sheesh, i knew i built them to be Durable, but not that durable.
rampant

02-11-07, 07:53 PM		Satnak - I told you instal an ambient nutrition absorbtion system.

Terrek - Well then there wouldn't be enough room for the breath weapons.

Satnak - Not if you rig them both through digestive tract, it also let you increase fuel efficiency and reduce waste output.

Terrek - ... When did you get so smart?

Satnak - Hello! just because I can't keep up with you when it comes to constructs doesn't mean I don't know my way around other critters. You think i'd be able to rearrange my physiology if i didn't?

Terrek - So those books in your room aren't all combat?

Satnak - No about a third are biology and medical texts.
DungeonJman

02-11-07, 07:57 PM		Evil DungeonJ: *after tapping something* wait.. *does some calculations*

COOOOOOOL!!!!

*begins switching Rose's brain back and forth between Good, Law, Neutrality, Evil, and Chaos in the style of a Beethoven Symphony where the alignments represent notes*

Jarlot: Just curious, how's his body not dying?

Evil DungeonJ: I put in an artificial brain that keeps everything running, but doesn't actually let him think or stuff like that. By the way, i thought that Sa'avor's half dragons were meant to help the Illithid Empire supplant everything in Ebberon.

*goes back to playing Beethoven's Fifth*
rampant

02-11-07, 08:18 PM		Kithle - I just use that to scare the politicians into leaving us alone. I mean honestly I don't want to rule the world, just annoy it.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-11-07, 09:14 PM		Sa'vor: Sheesh, i knew i built them to be Durable, but not that durable.
Silver: :pbbbtt: Rushed construction job. Now, if it had been me [The rest of what Silver said has been edited for content.]
Kithle - I just use that to scare the politicians into leaving us alone. I mean honestly I don't want to rule the world, just annoy it.
13: With great power, yadda yadda………
DungeonJman

02-11-07, 09:37 PM		Evil DungeonJ: Just curious, how long does it take for a elf's brain to be completely useless when seperated from its body? Any longer than a human's? Well, i'd better put this thing back.

*is about to stick it in Rose's head*

Should i do it? No, everyone would hate me for it and it wouldn't be right. *silence for a second*

BWAHAHA!

Ok, man i would like to see anyone who thought i was serious with that.

*sets the brain to Lawful Evil before putting it back in*

Now we just wait for the body to reaccept the brain, and he will not only lose his bard abilities, but i will have finally been able to turn someone, if not the person who i was supposed to be influencing, to evil.

*insert diabolical laugh here*

What the...? Why does that happen!?!?!
Charles Phipps

02-11-07, 10:23 PM		Chuck Norris: Well Lilly, while Tirmek and the rest help you out of this place. I've come to you to give you the joys unbound of PRESTIGE CLASSES.

*A holy Book of Nine Swords-SPECIAL EDITION descends*

Lilly: But aren't prestige classes just for Twinks and Sorcerers?

Chuck: No Lilly, for here is the key to true Badassery.

Lilly: I'm already sort of an Arcane Paladin.

Chuck: Ah ha but in 3.75 edition, Arcane Paladin is a base class!

Lilly: WOAH!

Chuck: Yes, Lilly, its time for you to learn the ways of a Dashing Swordsman!

Lilly: SWASHBUCKLING HERE I COME!
DungeonJman

02-11-07, 10:53 PM		*Rose is beginning to come back to life, it will take another hour before he comes fully back*

Evil DungeonJ: Lets see, oh, I know the perfect thing, i just have to get the mechanics correct, then I shall have created the first ex-bard prestige class, dare i say it because it is so corny? Yes. I will have created:

The BARDGUARD!!!

*insert diabolical laughter here*

Stop doing that! Anyway, i will create the perfect ex-bard prestige class, full on twinkery, lawful and/or evil uses for bard music, diplomacy/mind control, and better spells!

Ketler: Wait, the semi opposite version, combined with the lawful evilness. Oh Khyber, he's creating a cross between Steve Austin from Six Million Dollar Man, Darth Vader, Nale, and a bard! Well, Steve Austin is mainly for the rebuilding part.

Nobby: What does any of that mean?
rampant

02-12-07, 12:03 AM		Tirmek - Just *smash* stay *crush* DEAD! *crunch*

Bunny - My sentiments exactly kid.

Tirmek holds up a thigh bone.

Tirmek - No way this is gonna work...but you're going to do it anyway aren't you. Hey Sarah see the bone?

Sarah - pant pant pant!

Tirmek - Fetch girl!

Tirmek hurls the bone down between two rows of undead.

Sarah - Bonzai!

Sarah lopes down between the rows slamming down the hapless skeltons down as she shifts into her hybrid form.

Sarah - haaaaaaaaa *leap* aaaa *crunch*

Sarah sets down and begins chewing on her prize.

Skeleton 1 - I get the feeling we aren't being taken seriously.

Skeleton 2 - Whatever gave you that idea?

Skeleton 1 - Well the whole fetch thing, and then there's that.

Teiza - (from atop a throne of bones) ahahahahahahahah
rampant

02-12-07, 01:13 AM		Dies - No fair how come she gets a throne of bones, and I don't?

Terra - Because she doesn't try to steal the materials from Andrea.

Scias - g.....g.........got it!

Back at the fight

Teiza - Hey where did my gaming chair go?

Back to the FF

Dies - Thanks! Here's a get out of pranking free card.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-12-07, 01:46 AM		Deis sits.

*KAPOW*

She is now covered in a beautiful shade of aquamarine.

Deis: :bored: ...I suppose I deserved this, huh?

Momo & Scias: :evillaugh

Nina: *hand on her hips* :mad: That's not nice! Do I have to put you both in time out? Hold Person

Momo & Scias: :gel:

Deis: Um...help? Sovereign Glue hardening over here.

*off to the side*

Terra: *sigh* *amused* What are we gonna do with them?

Lisa: *snuggle* We both know we wouldn't have it any other way.
Charles Phipps

02-12-07, 01:49 AM		*Lilly's latest montage*

Sarah: Wow, that's really impressive.

Tirmek: Bah, charisma based fighting styles! Ridiculous!

*Sarah then notices her tail sticking out*

Tirmek: I mean who the hell thinks a charisma bonus for fighting MAKES SENSE!?

*Sarah makes a grab for her own tail*

Tirmek: Now, Dexterity, yes. Strength, yes. Hell, I can make room for even WISDOM or Intelligence but...

*Sarah spins around a lot*

Tirmek: Sarah are you chasing your own tail again?

*CRACK*

Sarah: Got it! Now....I need a Doctor.
rampant

02-12-07, 01:54 AM		Tirmek - One of these days I need to find a heling power that doesn't screw me over. *empathic transfer*

Sarah - All better yay!

Tirmek - Someone help me set my spine!
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-12-07, 09:29 AM		A fireball explodes amungst a group of newly raised skeletons, sending shards of bone everywhere.
Sithis raises his hand again and unleashes a lightning bolt spell, destroying another group of skeletons.

Sithis: They just keep coming!

The chant was still rising, but instead of Skeletons somthing else had risen from the bones. It stood over twenty feet high at the shoulder, it walked on four long powerful legs. It possessed a Skeletal head with a massive Maw, its most distinctive aspect was the mottled gray and black body that seemed to carry a wasting illness. Angry, red, Pus-filled sores that pulse and weep cover its flesh. Buzzing insects surround the creature, feasting of its rotting body.

Sithis stepped back, Terror rising over him at this new monstrocity.

OOC: There's a :cookie: for the person who can correctly guess the creatures name.
rampant

02-12-07, 12:37 PM		OOC: Charnel hound?
---------------------------

Maladren - Go fish

Izzy - Damn!!

Lady - Got any 3's izzy?

Izzy - Hate You!
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-12-07, 03:59 PM		[QUOTE=rampant;11463976]OOC: Charnel hound? [QUOTE]

OOC: Sorry, no cookie.

IC:

The muscels on the creatures frame contract. sending forth a wave of necromantic pus that covered everything in a 30ft radius.
including a now royally p***ed off vampire.

Sithis: I only baught these clothes a decade ago! Do you have an idea how difficult pus is to get out of silk?

Sithis raises his staff.. only to be knocked off his feet by one of the tenticles that had sprung from the creatures shoulders.

***

Feal-Thas: (after leaving intensive care) Note to self, Invest in a ring of sustinance.

***

OOC: the ring of pus drains strength, deals acid damage and sickens, just another clue.
rampant

02-12-07, 04:13 PM		OOC: the ring of pus drains strength, deals acid damage and sickens, just another clue.

OORampant - I'm not so sure I want to know anymore.

Lord of the half-biscuits - Have at thee!

OORampant - O give it up! The cruisants surrendered, the doughnuts got eaten, the english muffins got lost, and the bagels have rebelled.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-12-07, 04:58 PM		Sarah: BY DOSE!!!

*pus spray just misses her*

Sarah: *nearly faints from overpowering stench*

Lilly: Is it possible to fail a Smell Check? 'Cause either I failed my Spot AND Listen Checks or you guys are messing with me.

Goblin Ninja: Wow, a Spoony Dashing Swordsman. I never thought I'd see the day.

Lilly: YES! I made my Spot Check!

*kills Goblin Ninja*

Elina & Miko: :inlove:

Lilly: But seriously, what is everyone so upset about?

Tirmek: :nonono:
ratslinky

02-12-07, 05:06 PM		OORatslinky: Not sure is it an Alien?

IC:

*What appear to be eggs rise up from the ground*

Mareth: What are they

Esabar: Oh no now I remember they are eggs quick kill them all

Mareth: I'm on it *Takes out a wand of Maximized, Enlarged, Heightened, Empower, Energy Admixture Lightning Fireball* Hope this works *Uses it. Boom the Fireball goes of in all it's glory. Fire and lightning bounce of the walls blasting the eggs to smithereens and even doing some visible damage to the walls*

*Then a mighty howl shakes the island and in the sacrificial chamber the doors open*

Gaz: Quick lets get out of here

Mareth: I'm way ahead of you
rampant

02-12-07, 06:28 PM		Tirmek - *SMACK*

Lily - Okay Satnak's nephew or no, you can't possibly honestly think you can take this monster in standard melee.

Tirmek - Oh no, i'm not that arrogant-

Lily - Yeah sure!:rolleyes:

Tirmek - But as an evil creature I can use my Incarnate weapon to stun it, as an undead creature it has a Fortitude save almost as low as your Will throws. I just keep smacking it *SMACK* every 6 seconds and I can keep it down while the rest of you deal with the last of the minions.
Charles Phipps

02-12-07, 07:00 PM		IC:

Commentators Booth

Rose: A brief interlude for our storyline for the FORGOTTEN FREEDOM OLYMPICS!

Jarlot: All I have to say is....DAMN YOU TO HELL MICHAEL! YOU BETTER NOT LOSE OR YOUR OUT OF THE FAMILY!

*Rose begins strangling Jarlot with mike wire*

Rose: The Judge will kindly remain impartial. Let's open it up with a long time crew member we rarely see, SMOKEY THE FIRE ELEMENTAL whom is setting the Torch for our games to begin!

Jarlot: Whose that screaming?

Rose: We decided to use Pholly's chili as the torch accelerant and he was crushing the meat with his feet when they set him alit.

Jarlot: His...fe...is that how he does it?

*Jarlot gets a foul look to his mouth and runs away to vomit*

Rose: Our first event is the 100 meter dash!

Track

Lilly: I am so going to win this.

Tirmek: BAH! You and what army?

*starter pistol goes off*

Lilly: Loser.

Tirmek: Stupid head.

Lilly: Your mother is a Tiger.

Tirmek: HALF ELF!

Lilly: Inbred Half-Noble!

Tirmek: I AM HALF OF NOTHING!

*Tirmek tackles Lilly and they begin fighting*

*Elina walks by being carried by her team while a Gold medal hangs from her neck*

Commentator's Booth

Rose: Our next event is FIGURE skating!

Jarlot: Oh hell yes!

Rose: Why are you so excited.

Jarlot: We know the only figures that matter in THIS booth is the fine young ladies in short skirts!

Rose: Our first participant is your daughter Jaela.

Jarlot: Dammit!

Ice Rink

*Jaela slides out with her gray bunches forming a cute little addition to her attire as the beautiful Pontiff's official mini-skirt in the Reformed Flameite Church is accompanied by her Shepherd's Crook shaped like a moonwand while she does a fabulous piroquet and spin*

Rose: *drool*

Jarlot: Dammit! Your related by marriage!

*Jaela continues her breathtaking manuevers and winks at the audience who falls in love*

Jarlot: GRRRRRRR! STOP LOOKING AT MY DAUGHTER!

Rose: A PERFECT TE...

*Y/R/E then slips out onto the rink and whacks Jaela with a club in the back of her knee*

Rose: OH NO!

Commercial Break

Announcer: Do you have enough amphetimines in your diet? TRY OUR NEW ENERGY DRINK! You won't feel better until your dead!

Commentator's Booth

Rose: After that shameful display of trickery, it's time for our...

Jarlot: SWIMSUIT COMPETITION!

Rose: I think you mean SWIMMING Jarlot.

Jarlot: I say what I mean, especially with the new rules changes that Volleyball made ads a precedent.

Rose: Our first competitors will be our Junior swimming champs in thirteen year olds Elina and Sarah!

Jarlot: DAMNIT!

Lilly and Tirmek: :drool:

Ketler: :drool:

*Tirmek and Lilly pause, look at each other, then jump on Ketler to beat him up*

Rose: I admit that its anyone's guess who will win in this contest since both of them have the advantage of their tails as rudders.

Jarlot: Bah, the only thing they can do is dog paddle.

Swim Meet

Elina: Ready...

Sarah: Steady...

*Ivy in his warforged state leaps into the pool first and the other competitors are washed away in the tidal wave as he then walks along the empty pool to the finish line*

Rose: OOOOOH! What an upset!

Jarlot: GET TO THE BABES!

Rose: Well Jarlot...

Jarlot: Forget it, if I'm not going to see some skin than I'm out of here.

*throws down his commentator's headset and walks off*

Rose: Okay, next competition, Women's Bikini Beach Volleyball!

Beach

Aerith: Tee hee! I have a little red bikini!

Andrea: I like my black and white tightly fitting one.

Satnak: Just dare to check me out, go ahead and try.

Serene: I'm a lust object for boys everywhere!

Zella: Mmmmmm Elvish tan, I play next right?

Hours later

Rose: Well, I don't really know who won but uhhh....I'll be in my bunk.

Commercial Break

Announcer: Do you want the power to slay armies with nothing but a jagged piece of metal? Do you want to be able to seduce ANYONE you desire? Do you want to have the ability to set people on fire just by willing it?

DRINK MOUNTAIN DEW!

Commentator's Booth

Rose: Okay, ahem, now that's through.

Terra: YO! I'm a new commentator.

Rose: Great.

Terra: Oddly, they wouldn't let me competite at volleyball. Said, I was scaring children.

Rose: I can't imagine.

Terra: Oh like Satnak doesn't!

Rose: Our next event is the Javelin toss!

Arena

Chance Random: I'll have you know that you face as your opponent, CAPTAIN Chance Random.

Doog II: Chance is Javelin?

Chance Random: What? I...

*Chance is grabbed by his feet and spun around before he's thrown three hundred meters by the Half-Orc*

Rose: A NEW WORLD RECORD!

Terra: Meh, I've seen better.

Rose: Our final competition for the day is the *stares at paper*......gladiator melee free for all?

Terra: We went old school Olympics.

Rose: Okay.

*Song, Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny plays*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76CS9z9kQ44

Rose: Okay...

Terra: I had my money on Admiral Jarlot.

Rose: Admiral Jarlot IS Mister Rogers.

Terra: :blink:

OOC: Inspired by Super Deformed Gundam Olympics http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=
7vyErTPhlBQ
DungeonJman

02-12-07, 07:18 PM		*Rose walks out of the thing, before the Evil DungeonJ steps out of the shadows*

Evil DungeonJ: Wow, nice acting.

Rose (now available in "EVIL" tm): Thanks, now...

Evil DungeonJ: Wait, wait, wait. If you're going to be an evil genius, you have to have an accent

Rose: What?

Evil DungeonJ: *sighs* Read this *gives him the book "Lawful Evil Geniuses for Dummies"

Rose: Hey, why don't you have an accent!

Evil DungeonJ: I'm "neutral" evil, not lawful evil.

Rose: Are you sure, because neutral evil people don't exploit technicalities like that!
rampant

02-12-07, 07:20 PM		Satnak - (emerging from under a pile of corpes) Eat lame anime reference! *throws Norris's corpse at jarlot which promptly explodes sening bone shrapnel into Jarlot) Mess with the best and you get beat like the rest!
DungeonJman

02-12-07, 07:36 PM		*is walking around the ship while eating a bagel, which suddenly begins levitating in the air and glowing black*

Ummmm, can somebody check the Book of Omens for a levitating, blacklight bagel?
Charles Phipps

02-12-07, 07:42 PM		Satnak - (emerging from under a pile of corpes) Eat lame anime reference! *throws Norris's corpse at jarlot which promptly explodes sening bone shrapnel into Jarlot) Mess with the best and you get beat like the rest!

Admiral Jarlot: It's a beautiful day in my neighborhood.....*ITCH!

*pulls out flaming sword*

Captain Jarlot: Yeah, dad and her will be at this for awhile.

OOC: That whole thing was more deranged than usual for me.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-12-07, 08:46 PM		OOC: That whole thing was more deranged than usual for me.
OOcat: No, not really. :bored:

Admiral Jarlot: Okay…whoever you are…I'llllllllll—:love:

Satnak: :confused:

Admiral Jarlot: (quickly changes into a red admiral suit with a really short skirt) Hello, lovely. My my…aren't we a strapping young la-dy. Why don't you…come back to my ship with me for a light dinner and some…cham-pagen. Vrin!

Vrin (in same kind of suit): *dejected groan* Yes, Admiral?

Admiral Jarlot: Call back to the ship and…make ready the lovenasyum.

Vrin: Sir, I think you should recon—

Admiral Jarlot: Nonsense. For is this not what every man has ever dreamed of doing? (silence) I asked you a question, Vrin.
rampant

02-12-07, 09:00 PM		Serene - NO ONE MAKES PASSES AT MY WIFE BUT ME!

Scene of unimaginable horror that is not meant for mortal or immortal minds.

Kanatash - And they say I'm sick and wrong.

Satnak - Does being turned on by watching my wife perform unspeakable acts to that chump make me a bad person?

Lisa - What are you looking at me for? I'm getting turned on by picturing Terra doing the same thing.

Rose - I always figured Serene for the Jealous type, but this is nuts.

Andrea - I figured you'd be taking notes?

Caralot - I wish I could but this is too brutal for Kanny and I.

Dorvos - Hmmmmmmmm

Hands Serene a sewing needle and the head of a stuffed barney.

Serene - Awww Thanks sweetheart, now run along so your young mind isn't cracked by what I'm about to do.

Dorvos exits...very quickly

Serene forms her claws

Admiral J - What are you doing? No not the little admiral!

Slice!

Admiral J - Ohhh good gods no! evil gods? nuetral gods? Anybody? Elder gods? ANYBODY STOP HER! She's sewing that THING'S head on me!

Kithle - ... I'm just glad Magnificcent ***** is a seperate title.

13 - I'm torn, i need to go get the plaque, but I can't stop watching.
Charles Phipps

02-12-07, 09:09 PM		*five minutes later*

Serene: That'll teach you.

Admiral Jarlot: Hey folks.

Serene: GAH!

Rose: I should have warned you. Admiral Jarlot is so stupid that he warps reality around him. He probably just forgot you did anything to him.

Admiral jarlot: Did what?
rampant

02-12-07, 09:34 PM		Serene - But he'll be reminded everytime he tries to-

Admiral J - *Rushing out of the bathroom* Dear Gods What did they do to the Little Admiral!

Serene - Or at least until it stops being funny.
DungeonJman

02-12-07, 09:37 PM		*bagel stops levitating and glowing black*

Oh, so THAT'S what it's an omen of.
ratslinky

02-12-07, 09:47 PM		Esabar: Wait before we go there's something I need *Uses her power to cut a stone tablet off the wall*

Mareth: Whats it say and how can you read it

Esabar: I remember a language a bit like it but I can't place it once we get outside this field I can use some magic to decipher it

*They all run out. Once out side Esabar zero's in on Tirmek's location and teleports Mareth to it*
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-12-07, 10:06 PM		OOC: Glad you guys liked it………or at least liked riffing off of it. I should do the whole spoof package on that one.

Stupid: Unfortunately the FF combines both the spaceship and the suicide booth.

Bunny: Suicide booth? Why haven't I thought up this concept before?

Stupid: Make sure it's high-quality. Some of those things have lousy aim.
urial angel of death

02-13-07, 10:29 AM		Now I'm sure you're all wondering where Kerrith has been all this time

all: No

Those arguements aside; I'm going to have to tell you. He barely made it off the ship.

Kerrith: *chasing after Vladamire* Damn our entity and his obsession with Drowtales!

Vladamire: You can't stop me from making Bod the undead chicken version 2.0

Myrr: Kitten! *hugging Momo*

Momo: Can't breath!

Lenneth: I refuse to be an unholy cross between a blue berry and an elf! You die now!

OOUrial: :eek:
urial angel of death

02-13-07, 01:18 PM		OOC: The following was composed by OOKaizer as is made evident by the writing skills that far surpass my own.

Lisa: Stand down, all of you!

Hensen: But-!

Lisa: Quiet, Hensen! You! *points at Volrath* Explain this.

Volrath: Well-

A holy sword stabs him in the chest from behind, and he twists his head around to look at Giovanni.

Volrath: :mad: That stings, you know?

Lisa: Giovanni, I said stand down.

Giovanni: Interesting. You would defend this abomination?

Lisa: Like it or not, you answer to me. Stand down.

Giovanni smirks and withdraws his sword as Lisa walks over to the doppleganger and begins healing.

Hensen: My Queen, that creature was trying to infiltrate our ranks! He deserves no mercy!

Lisa: *raised eyebrow* Infiltrate?

Giovanni: He hid his presence at the behest of this devil child *motions to Volrath* in an attempt to destroy our glorious Church.

Volrath: Glorious?! You're no better than the 'abominations' you murder!

Lisa: Enough, Volrath. You're not helping the situation. But I knew he wasn't human. I was unaware of his connection to Volrath, but the silver blood gave him away. And no warrior worth their salt can miss the difference between a human's aura and his.

Hensen: *incredulous* And still you trained him in the ways of a Paladin?!

Lisa: I didn't know what he was exactly, but his heart was in it. There was no incincerity in his desire to worship the Silver Flame. How could I deny him that?

Having stablized Gregory, she stands to face them. Giovanni still bears the acid burns from Volrath, and Volrath has only just finished regenerating from the chest wound. The look in Volrath's eyes was one of hate as he stared at Giovanni, and she knew the blind fanaticism on the inquisitors faces all to well. There would likely be more blood for this.

Giovanni: *chuckles* So she shows her true colors. The heathen Queen would defend these creatures to the point of bringing down the faith she claims to follow.

Again raising his swords, he starts for Lisa, only to have Volrath grab him and slam him into the wall.

Volrath: :devil: You're quarrel is with me.

Volrath's acidic blood continues to burn Giovanni with each slice, and Hensen and the Warforged's re-entry into the fray made life less than pleasant for the Half-Blood. Suddenly, Hensen begins screaming bloody murder as Giovanni severs one of Volrath's tentacles and a spray of acid hits the unfortunate inquisitor in the face.

With Gregory hovering on the edge of death, Hensen in worse shape, and Volrath and Giovanni locked in mortal combat, Lisa decided enough was enough. There was still one way to end this without one of them dying. She unsheathed the Sword of Sutekh and passed through the combatants in a blur. The Warforged falls as it's legs seem to disassemble on their own. Volrath just stands there, a bit stunned that she hit him as well. She had stuck each and every one of his tentacles with the flat side of the blade, effectively stopping his assault cold. Giovanni's face had a look of glee plastered across it as his armor fell apart.

Volrath: Guess I should have expected that, considering your experience with multiple appendages.

Lisa: :blush: *ahem* Are you quite done?

Giovanni: Oh, yes. We are quite through with this charade.

In one swift motion, he turns and throws one of his blessed blades straight at Lisa. Taken completely by surprise at his madness, she is too slow to react. She raises her arms instinctively and braces for impact.

When the blade does not connect, she lowers her arms. Standing before her is Gregory, back in human form, with a sword buried in his chest. Silver blood pours from the wound as Giovanni sneers.

Gregory: Sorry, Sensei. *coughs up blood* I had hoped to avoid causing you grief. *wince* Thank you for trusting me as your student...

With this, the sword bursts into silver flame, immolating Gregory in the process. As Lisa stands stunned, Volrath stabs Giovanni with several tentacles, burning him with the acid still leaking from them. Giovanni turns and sends out a gout of silver flame at Volrath, but misses when the boy leaps to the side. The Warforged and Hensen, however, are not so lucky. When the flames die, Giovanni finds himself between Lisa's blade in his shoulder and Volrath's tentacles crushing his ribcage.

Lisa: You're insane! Do you really think this madness is doing the Flame's work?!

Giovanni: :smirk: You will never understand, traitor. You will be seen for what you are soon enough. But I am nearing my limit.

Blessed paper swirls out of his shirt, forcing both Lisa and Volrath to back away.

Giovanni: Mark my words, boy. You and your thrall will not get off so lightly next time.

The paper completely obscures him as his aura disappears. When the paper vanishes, Giovanni is gone. Hensen lies horribly burned, and the Warforged is beyond repair.
DungeonJman

02-13-07, 07:22 PM		*as Rose is working on the evil accent, the embodiments of all the alignments come brawling out*

Representative of Good: Not fair, you can't just claim someone because their alignment switched!

Primus: The law is the law, and he now belongs both evil and law.

Baernoloth: Well i say that we let him make his own decision, :devil: he'll know what's right.

All: Fine

This Plane is Your Plane *sung to "This Land is My Land" ripped off from the Jibjab version*

Primus: This plane is your plane, this plane is my plane, your a crazy mishmash, i'm perfection. Your brain is so messed up, it's wonder that your brain still accomplishes processes, this soul shall surely choose me!

Slaad Lord: Your weirder, than i could be, you offer strict laws, i offer freebies! I'm known by many, not even the modrons know that you exist! This soul shall surely choose me!

Baernoloth: You've got as much restrictions as that law guy Primus, i offer you power, grabbed by your fist! Ethics are outdated, anything goes by me! This soul shall surely choose me!

ROG: You're really lousy, it's obvious to see. Everyone knows the heroes, win in the movies! I offer salvation, which is more than he understands! This soul shall surely choose me!

Argenach: Neutrality ain't got much, that's for certain. Balance, but not much else'n. But we guarantee, you won't have to deal with this alignment junk! This soul shall surely choose me!

Slaad Lord: Your a lawful sissie!

Primus: Your a chaotic nutjob!

ROG: You've got no ethics!

Baernoloth: You're weaker than that zombie, Bob.

Argenach: At least with neutrality, you don't have to worry about this alignment junk!

All: This soul shall choose, this soul shall choose, this soul shall surely choose meeeeeeee!

*all disappear*

Rose: well, that was weird. Darn it! I didn't say it in the accent!
rampant

02-13-07, 07:46 PM		Dorvos - Hmmmm!

Lisa - Oh hey Dorvos, what are you-

sees note clipped to his torso wrap, reads : Hi Hun,

Need me to res Anybody?

-Your little devil:D

Lisa - haha yeah go get her

Dorvos - Hmmmm:mad:

Lisa - Fine here's your tip:rolleyes: *flips dorvos a gold*

Dorvos - Hmmmmmm *ducks into a portal*
Kaizer_Ryu

02-13-07, 08:28 PM		OOUrial: *DEEP VOICE* Denied!

Terra: But-

OOUrial: No Resurrection for you!

Lisa: But-!

OOUrial: :tantrum: NO!

OOKaizer: Sorry. He's dead dead. DM magic.

Terra: Curses! A Diety's only weakness!

Ghost of Gregory: :weep: What do I do then?

OOKaizer: You could always try the one place those who can change their stripes at will can fit in without a problem...

Ghost of Gregory: I may be dead, but I'm not selling my soul.

OOUrial: :mad: Stop trying to recruit dead members of the Forgotten Freedom into politics!

OOKaizer: :shifty: What? I just heard D.C.'s nice this time of year...

13: Give it up. He's on to us.

OOKaizer: Crap. Do I still get paid?

13: No Wii for you.

OOKaizer: :weep:
rampant

02-13-07, 09:05 PM		Terra - Reincarnate? Raise dead? Revivify? Wish? Miracle? Reality revision?... Wow since when did staying dead involve more paperwork than coming back to life?

13 - Whistles

Bunny - *angry pom*
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-13-07, 09:25 PM		Bunny - *angry pom*
OOC: Officially lost.
DungeonJman

02-13-07, 09:27 PM		Hey! Don't make me call in the one force more powerful than even Io on this world, in order to stop you from selling souls to Washington!

OOUrial: Yeah right, what can you do... *mouth drops as a dark cloud forms over the horizon while shooting out lightning*


Cloud of WizO's: *big deep booming voice*Talking about politics is forbidden by the CoC. Stop Immediately!

OOUrial::eek: Ok.

*the cloud dissipates*

Terra: I thought that you couldn't do something like that, and that it was above your powers to create a manifestation that could actually scare an E.B.N.E.

OODungeonJ: I didn't do anything, it's a force that surpasses anything in this universe.

Evil DungeonJ: And who says that you can't create something that scares E.B.N.E.'s?

*takes out the Master Sword*

OOKaizer: How'd you get that?

OODungeonJ: I stole it while removing Rose's brain, now both of you start running since you're only level 1 characters. :devil:

OOUrial: You know, you're not realy creating anything.

Evil DungeonJ: :mad: NOT IMPORTANT! NOW DIE!!! *begins chasing after both of them with the Master Sword*
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-13-07, 09:38 PM		Cloud of WizO's: *big deep booming voice*Talking about politics is forbidden by the CoC. Stop Immediately!
OOcat: I hate to break it to you, but other than the letters D.C. that statement could have referred to politics anywhere. I mean, if we can't make fun of politics at all then we can't mock all those useless Eberronian monarchs.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-13-07, 09:41 PM		OOKaizer: It was in jest and no parties were spared from the taunting. Not to mention a one time thing.

Cloud of WizO's: Very well. *disappears*

OOUrial: :mad: How, exactly, did I end up as the target?

Kithle: *whistles non-chalantly as he wanders out of sight holding a large bag of Platinum*

OOKaizer: :shifty: No reason...

Evil DungeonJ: NOT IMPORTANT! NOW DIE!!! *begins chasing after both of them with the Master Sword*

OOKaizer: :bored: *extends his hand*

The Master Sword disappears in a flash of light and reappears in OOKaizer's hand, Keyblade style.

OOKaizer: *REALLY COOL FIGHTING STANCE* The Blade of Evil's Bane is not for one such as you.

Dramadar: Oh, no you don't!

OOKaizer: *Nayru's Love*

Dramadar: :tantrum: DAMMIT!

*after Dramadar's impressive demise*

OOKaizer: :w00t: ness! Another Heart Container! *grabs it*
DungeonJman

02-13-07, 09:42 PM		I meant real world politics, sometimes you guys can't generalize everything! Sorry about the mistakes, i've been really bad on grammar in the forums today.

By the way. i thought somebody else besides Rose had the master sword

*it disappears*

Evil DungeonJ: Nooo!

OOKaizer: Well?

OOdungeonJ: I forgot, but this'll work well enough. As long as it stops him from hurting anyone, or being evil in any way Yay! :D

OOKaizer: Okay, that's really creepy.

*Evil DungeonJ begins blasting at OOKaizer, OOUrial, and OODungeonJ*

Evil DungeonJ: I'm a Warlock, moron!

OODungeonJ: Run!
cypher_zero

02-14-07, 12:50 AM		OOC: To be entirely honest, I don't think the mods spend much time monitoring this thread. I mean seriously. If they wanted to, they'd have to have one guy whose job it was from 9 to 5 to keep tabs on this thread alone. And all his co-workers would hate him because it'd be the most awesome job ever. But anyways, my point is, it think the mods think that we've been doing this for so long we basically take care of ourselves and so probably don't even bother to watch us for that reason alone. That said...

ANY MODS OUT THERE SAY HI!

Just.. you know... to let us know that you are actually out there.

Hmm... wouldn't that be funny if one of the WizO's became a regular poster on here? That'd be kinda funny. Wow. I'm rambling. I need sleep. Much more of this and I'm going to start hearing voices. You already do. No I don't, what are you talking about? You are talking to yourself right now. Stop it. I'm not crazy. So how come you always do what I tell you? You ARE me! No I'm not. Now whose crazy?! You're all frickin nuts. Hey! If I'm crazy, so are you! Shuddup! Oh go back to bed you! You jerks woke me up in the first place! It wasn't me; I was over there reading. Those two started it. Wait, which one am I again? You're the crazy one! Wait... I thought you were the crazy one? No, the other crazy one is him. You guys are spending way too much time talking to Crystalforged. We only talk to him once a week! Like I said; too much time. Whatever, I know I'm not crazy. That's EXACTLY what a crazy person would say! You'd know wouldn't you! ALL OF YOU JUST SHUT UP! Hey, don't look at me, I've been over here this whole time. SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! Jeeze... Somebody's cranky. I woke up for this? THAT'S IT! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU ALL! He has anger issues. I think it's misdirected self loathing. KILL YOU! But wouldn't you really only be killing yourself? HADOK-
.
rampant

02-14-07, 01:42 AM		OOUrial - nononnoonnonononoNO! You are dead, DEAD, CORPSEY MCDEADERSON!

Gregory - Well can I posses, haunt, overshadow, ghostride, ghostwrite, bind, inhabit, cohabit, or reside?
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-14-07, 07:12 AM		OOC: My advice is to give them all different appearances, names, anything so that you can tell them apart.

OOcat: Why are you giving this advice? We made you, not the other way around. We're different because we started out that way.

OOC: :mad: Doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about.
DungeonJman

02-14-07, 09:05 AM		Wow, you guys are starting to hear voices, you must be crazy.

Evil DungeonJ: What about me?

OODungeonJ: You can knock me onto the ground with an eldritch blast, that's real enough for me.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-14-07, 09:44 AM		Wow, you guys are starting to hear voices, you must be crazy.
OOC: Well of course I'd hear voices if people are talking to me.

Silver: Dude, chill. :cool: No one cares.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-14-07, 10:17 AM		OOC: you mean your NOT hearing voices? i thought everyone did... well everyone who posts here at least.

IC:
The Hullathoin snarled, for that was what it was*, the defilers could not be allowed nearer to the holy city. he could still remeber his moment of awakining, all those millenia ago.

The first thing he saw was those eyes, vivid green and almond shaped, mercyless and cold. then the face came into focus, thin with pale flawless skin. it wore its blond hair long, and was thin and graceful.
It spoke

Master: You are Hullathoin. you are bound to my will, Who is the master?

Hullathoin: You are the master.

Master: you will protect this land from those who would defile its sacred soil. they shall not be allowed to enter the spire.

And then it remebered being buried beneath the earth, beneath the bones of lesser creatures. It remebered the lonliness of centuries passing by, the cold dank embrace of the earth around it.
and then, it could feel the voice of the masters again. their chant reinvigorating it. awakining it from its slumber.
it could smell blood, warmth. it could smell those that dared tresspass on this holy isle. as the chant rose it rised from the eath, unleashing the pus that had collected in the sores all over its body.

It smiled as it saw the effect on the lesser creatures around it, but there was one. one whom in its mantic sight did not seem right... it did not glow like the living. bound across its body was bands of darkness, and glowing crimson runes flared to life... its eyes rather than pits of life where pits of darkness. the creature snarled, grabbing its staff, speaking a strange langauge

Hullathoin swung a tenticle at its shoulder at it, knocking the creature from its feet. Hullathoin turned, this mantic sight focusing on the enemies arrayed before it. A Half-Elf, Two creatures with lycanthropy, A Half-Rakshasa and the .. thing.
The Rakshasa charged, brining its hammer to bear. The Hullathoin felt pain rush through it as struck. It stumbled shaking its head to get rid of the stars...

* the cookie goes to Demonfey, who PMed me on monday.
rampant

02-14-07, 11:02 AM		Before it could recover another creature rose from the earthstriking with a blade of shadow magic wrapped around its hand. THis one was physically like the half-elf only smaller. But this soul was not a pulsing beacon of positive energy, nor was it like the other a being of darkness and strange magic. Its soul was undeniably strong, but it didn't pulse, waver, or flicker, this soul was solid, like the animating energies of constructs, yet alive. This creature is somesort of Living Construct Immune to poisons and imbued necromantic magics the Hullathoin possesed. That left brute strength and power. Toobad that Rakshasa and its accursed hammer kept coming.
rampant

02-14-07, 01:46 PM		Tirmek - Where is that shipment, It was supposed to be here last week! No tip for the delivery schmuck.

Sarah - Hey Tirmek!

Tirmek - AUUUHGH! Too Soon!
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-14-07, 01:52 PM		Sithis rose, and saw the Hullathoin crumple to the floor beneath the combined blows of the others. Sithis switched to his mantic sight, his pupils becoming silver
.
he watched as the negative energy left the Hullathoin, and the mystic runes engraved across its skin faded. after shutting off the mantic sight Sithis cleaned his clothes with a cantrip, though there where still a few stains his clothing would prove servicable for the rest of the trip. he then motioned to his travelling chest, an advanced packmate he had created a few weeks ago for the journey and began rummaging through it for his armour. judgeing by the resitance he'd met recently he would deffinetly be in need of it.

Lilly: what in Khyber was that thing?

Sithis: A Huallathoin, a gaurd left behind by the people who created this place. I havnt seen one since i left my home reality, my Uncle Raith was usually accompanied by one or two of them.

Sithis finally found it, he removed a set of Darkwood armour.
A Black breast plate with a Khyber shard set into it, Two similarly designed bracers also with Khyber shards set into them and Shin gaurds like the bracers. he removed his black silk duster and folded it, setting it within his packmate.
He donned the armour, flexing the different parts to test the agility.
Sithis then removed another duster, this one made from Black Leather, its form was heavily enchanted with spells, though he hadnt really had a chance to test it yet.

he turned to the others afterwards, keeping his right hand gripped on his staff.

Sithis: It appears from the lack of communication between us and the Forgotten Freedom that we are trapped here. and that all the traps set by the builders of this place are still fully functional. I suggest that we move with a lot more caution from now on, no one is to move too far away from the main group. undoubtably we've already awakened the defenders of this place, so we're probably expected. It'll be dark soon, so we need to find a place to camp quickly. once there we'll plan further ahead. alright?

everyone nods.

Sithis: Okay then, lets get moving. same formations as last time, if you get seperated send out a telepathic message. not too strong though, only to our becon. we dont want to attract any unwanted attention.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-14-07, 04:08 PM		Evil DungeonJ: I'm a Warlock, moron!

OODungeonJ: Run!
OOKaizer: :evillaugh

*insert scene of OOKaizer repelling the Eldrich Blast, Evil DungeonJ sending it back, and the process repeating till Evil DungeonJ eventually misses followed by OOKaizer whomping on his paralyzed form for a few seconds*

*rinse, repeat, wipe hands on pants*

OODungeonJ: Oh, right. Forgot he could do that.

OOUrial: You're looking at the man who beat Ocarina of Time with all upgrades collected and sidequests complete in the space of seven hours. :rolleyes: Warlocks don't intimidate him.

Evil DungeonJ: :gel:

OODungeonJ: :mad: Now he's just abusing metagame knowledge! You're not even supposed to be able to get Ice Arrows till after the Shadow Temple!

Evil DungeonJ: ...so...cold...
Kaizer_Ryu

02-14-07, 04:50 PM		Sarah: Elina? You ok?

Elina just stared at the last skeleton she had felled, a mix of happiness and concentration on her face.

Tirmek: What's going on?

Lilly: Don't know. She hasn't moved for the last few minutes.

Sarah: *checking her over* You're not hurt, that's good.

Lilly: The thing is...I'm pretty sure I saw some fire when she re-killed this thing.

Sarah: You mean-

Tirmek: -she cast a spell?!

Lilly: :D Part of one, I think.

Sarah immediately tackles Elina.

Elina: :eek: :D

Sarah: I knew it! I just knew you could!

Tirmek: Sarah, I know you're excited, but remember where we are.

Sarah continues to hug Elina, the elation slowly giving way to relief.

Sarah: I just...I was starting to think you'd never come out of it. I wanted to believe that you'd get better, but...

Tirmek: Sarah...

Sarah: *sniff* I know this is really hard on you, sis. I know you're trying your best. It's just... *sniff* ...I miss talking with you so much! :weep:

Elina: :(

Sarah: *sniff* Don't feel bad, sis. I'm just happy you're better, even if it's only a little. *dries her eyes* I'm sorry I lost hope. Now I know you'll get better, no doubt about it. I'm looking forward to the day you say my name again with all my heart.

Elina: :)

Lilly: ;) A smile suits you better.

Elina: :blush: :D

Tirmek: Now that's something I never thought I'd see...

Sarah: What?

Tirmek: Lilly being smooth.
rampant

02-14-07, 05:10 PM		Teiza - *sniffsniff*

Tirmek - Wait no don't-

Teiza - *Chomp*

Lily - gaaalg gross she's eating it!

Sithis - :twitch:

Sarah - Do you have any idea how long that's been dead?!
--------------------------------------------------------------------

Ketty - What are you doing with all that...pink stuff?

Tirmek - Apparently its traditional to comemorate the death of the Hobgoblin Bard Valentine, friend of lovers, by doing something special for your romantic interest.

Ketty - Hmmmmmmmm:plotting:
----------------------------------------------

Feal-thas - ....:gel: :hides:

Roosevelt - Whats up with you?

Feal-thas - Its a feelling
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-14-07, 05:32 PM		……the death of the Hobgoblin Bard Valentine, friend of lovers……
13: It's also commemorated by Silver and Bunny having a very big arguement.

Silver: He was my best disciple! :tantrum:

Bunny: He tried to make it with a frenzied berserker werebear when he was 110 and ate a pound of bacon a day! There's only so far I can stretch! :mad:
Feal-thas - ....:gel: :hides:

Roosevelt - Whats up with you?

Feal-thas - Its a feelling
13: You may be wondering what I'm doing here instead of Silver. Well, traditionally she's so busy argueing with Bunny that for the majority of the holiday I have to step it. :schemes:
rampant

02-14-07, 05:43 PM		Tirmek (girl form), sits on a giant chocolate heart, in a red frilly dress

Sarah - Too....Freaking....Cute! *flying tackle hug*
------------------------------------------------------------

Feal-thas - :OMG!

Ketty - (Wearing red Dominatrix gear) :evillaugh: Here's your gift.

Feal-thas opens a small box, in contains a tiny strip of leather that reads : Property of Ketty.

Feal-thas - Um this belt won't fit.

Ketty - That's a collar dear.

Feal-thas - I was afraid of that.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-14-07, 06:03 PM		Tara opens the door to her room, to find... flowers.
so many flowers infact that opening to door creates a land slide that promtly crushes her with its floral contence

(elsewhere)

Naz'roth: too many?

Feal-Thas: yep.
ratslinky

02-14-07, 06:20 PM		OORatslinky: Assume that off camera Gaz and Mareth have started dating

Gaz: Here you are my love *hands Mareth a box*

Mareth: *Open it inside is a Gaz plushie* *sigh* Gaz you know I don't like your looks in your natural form

Gaz: Thats why I had Hyrd make it a shape changing plushie it's thought activated look *concentrates for a moments. The plushie changes into and adorable pixie Gaz*

Mareth: Oh Gaz *glomph* :cloud9:

Gaz: :cloud9:
rampant

02-14-07, 06:42 PM		Hyrd - :ahem:

Ivy - Whats wrong cuddle muffin?

Hyrd - hyrd name hyrd, not hydras, hyrd, not hyral, hyrd, not hyrule, hyrd, not herald, HYRD!
rampant

02-14-07, 06:45 PM		Feal-thas - I'm glad Tirmek explained the holiday to you.

Ketty - I am too, its a nice tradition.

Feal-thas - *looks at the table* Apparently he hasn't explained all of the tradtions.

Ketty - (serving herself from a salad bowl of chopped roses, thorns and all) What?
Charles Phipps

02-14-07, 08:08 PM		Elina: *in sexy dress* Boo?

Thorn: *mutters* That must be her pet name for Lilly... *louder* Ah yes, my sweet. It is I, boo!

*takes her to a table*

Elina: Bwah?

Thorn: Yes, Bwahghest noodles and Lhazaar wine! Have as much as you like! *thinks* it's all POISONED anyway

Elina: Mmmmm

*Elina begins scarfing down all the poisoned food with a heart abandon*

Thorn: Hmmmmmm.

Elina: *burp*

Thorn: *thinks* Perhaps she has an immunity to poisons! Of course, she's an outsider! *speaks* So my dear, why don't you tell me about your day?

Elina: ....

Thorn: Come come.

Elina: Bwah Bah Bah Boo Boop booo bah.

Thorn: *thinks* Crap! This must be a secret language between her and Lilly! That cunning fiend! *says* Ha ha ha. Yes, of course. Why don't we not talk the rest of the night and simply dance?

Elina: YAY!

*Thorn gets close to Elina then and she snuggles in*

Thorn: *thinks* Now for Plan B. Now if only Lilly won't come through the window in the nick of time to save her

*waits*
*nothing happens*

Thorn: Splendid.

*STAB*
*STAB*
*STAB*
*STAB*
*STAB*

Elina: Boo?

Thorn: *thinks* Crap, my knife isn't enchanted enough to get through her damage reduction!
Kaizer_Ryu

02-14-07, 08:23 PM		Lisa & Terra: :cloud9: Kawaii... :cloud9:

The two are currently surrounded by adorable forest critters with giant anime eyes.

*off to the side*

Momo: Great idea, Nina!

Nina: :D Hooray! :D

Deis: I still don't understand why you guys wouldn't let me summon an Otyugh for them...

Scias: G-g-g-g-g............................gross...

Momo: You know we're not allowed to summon things yet.

Deis: But, but...! They just jump around playfully and be cute! Where's the slime? Where's the devouring of small, helpless critters? Where's the fun?!

-----

Bunny: I like this kid. :devil:

Silver: :tantrum: Don't change the subject!

-----

Nina: Valentine's day isn't about killing!

Momo: Unless your significant other forgets or does something lame.

Scias: *furiously scribbling notes*

Deis: *anime pouting*
urial angel of death

02-14-07, 09:56 PM		Volrath and P/Y/R's children suddenly appear beside Terra and Lisa's.

Myrr: Of course Valentine's day isn't about killing it's about-

Lenneth: Candy!

Myrr: That's not what I was going to say, sis.

Vladamire: But killing makes it better.

Kenney: *slowly edges away from Vladamire* Mfffmp'fmm mmmmmpppffmffmp mpffmfmmfpmpmffpppmfm mppfpmmpppffffmppfpppmpp ffmppffmf mmfmmmppp pmfmffpmpmpp fmpmfpmpppffmpp'fmm pppppf fmpppfppmppfpffpffppffpp.

Butters: Why? I thought only mommies and daddies were supposed to do that.

Momo: You can understand him?

Butters: Of course; we all can.

Nina: Why are you all here?

Myrr: Mommy said something about us needing to make more friends.

Lenneth: She also made daddy put on the suit. Which is of course our cue to leave; before the noises start.
DungeonJman

02-14-07, 10:49 PM		*Evil DungeonJ is wrapped up in a towel to warm up from the ice arrows*

OODungeonJ: You've been pretty quiet today

Evil DungeonJ: Look, i may not like the holiday, but i respect tradition. Every Evil Inclination does.

OODungeonJ: And why is this.

Evil DungeonJ: The boss is all about following his boss, who puts a very very strong emphasis on traditional laws. Plus, most of the best inclination precedent happens to come from previous times!
rampant

02-15-07, 12:30 AM		Tirmek - Mrrrrrrrrrrrr

Sarah - Thats my girl good kitty, scritchy scritchy.

Sithis - This is why i don't have a girlfriend.

Teiza - I thought it was because you were dating Doog jr.
rampant

02-15-07, 11:48 AM		Lily - If turning into a girl gets tirmek scitchies. I wonder what it would do for somone with an actual cha modifier? Someone like me?
-------------------------------------

Elina - boo bwah booo?

Lily - (currently a troll in a tuutuu) Note to self read the whole lable next time. Stupid discount potions.
DungeonJman

02-15-07, 12:34 PM		Evil DungeonJ: So the day's over right?

OODungeonJ: Yes, why do you...?

*begins firing a barrage of eldritch blasts. OOKaizer prepares to reflect them and hit him again, but none are aimed for anyone*

OOKaizer: What the heck was that?

Evil DungeonJ: Look on the floor.

*The blast marks on the ship's deck form the exact binding seal that was used on Evil DungeonJ before, around OODungeonJ*

Evil DungeonJ: Like i said, the best stuff comes from precedent. ARCANE BINDING SEAL OF THE MIND

*the same thing as last time with the multi-colored light sphere and the force field happens*

OODungeonJ: Let me out!

Evil DungeonJ: I don't think so. Rose, can you get a bunch of redshirts?

Rose: What for?

Evil DungeonJ: I have to find a book in the library, and you know the wards that Volrath set up.

Rose: Going.

OOKaizer: :rant: He's listening to you !?!?!

Evil DungeonJ: *quotes Lawful Evil Geniuses for Dummies*

For the promising evil novice, you should follow a master of greater power than you unfailingly until a time comes where you can usurp his power, or force him to be your own inferior.


Rose: You memorized the book !?

Evil DungeonJ: :devil: Reading brings Knowledge. Knowledge brings Power. Power Corrupts. Read books, learn some things, be evil.
rampant

02-15-07, 03:58 PM		Momo - What did your parents do?

Dorvos - Hmmmmmmmmmmm

Nina - He's right its better if we don't know.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-15-07, 07:58 PM		OOKaizer: *Farore's Wind* *disappears*

Evil DungeonJ: :tantrum: I FRIGGING HATE LINK!

OODungeonJ: Hey! Don't leave me here!

Evil DungeonJ: :gel: D-d-d-d-d-d-dammit! N-n-n-n-not ag-g-g-gain!

OOKaizer: Sorry about that. Farore's Wind only carries me and any NPC's who are following me.

Maivy: Hey!

OOKaizer: SON OF A-!

Maivy: Listen!

OOKaizer: Ok, ok, FINE! What is it now?!

Maivy: This seal looks strong. Maybe there's a switch somewhere?

OOKaizer: :mad: :rolleyes: Thank you for the blinding flash of obvious.

Evil DungeonJ: Oh, sure, like I'm gonna leave a switch that deactivates a seal just lying somewhere relatively easy to reach.

*Ice Arrow*

Evil DungeonJ: :gel:

OODungeonJ: You know, you're gonna run out of Magic Power sooner of la- *click* *seal fades* ...unless, of course, you find that switch he didn't leave sitting around. :bored:

OOKaizer: :D Lawful Evil Geniuses For Dummies Rule 5: Always Give The Hero An Opportunity To Foil Your Plan.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-15-07, 08:34 PM		Stewie: :mymy: Ooo, fuzzy...

P/Y/R has changed the channel from his usual death and killing show to a program on cultist behaviors. Namely the Telletubbies.

Tinky-Winky: *chasing a butterfly* Again!

Stewie: *slightly hysterical* Yes, yes, again! Oh please, once more! *reaches desperately for the screen*

Volrath: Sorry, son. *changes the channel* My recent lecture on the merits and pitfalls of using mortals as grafting material is on.

Stewie: *shakes his head* Wha...? I'm free! Free from the spell of those diabolical Telletubbies! *turns to Volrath* Thank you. *bows* When the world is mine, your death shall be quick and painless.

OOC: Anyone other than Urial who gets the reference gets a :cookie:
rampant

02-15-07, 08:41 PM		OOC: its another family guy reference ugh!
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-15-07, 08:50 PM		P/Y/R has changed the channel from his usual death and killing show to a program on cultist behaviors. Namely the Telletubbies.
A mass of half-biscuits is prostrating beforefour crude statues also in bronze, each with what looks like a TV antenna on top, which are arrayed in front of a baby face carved in bronze, ringed by fire. Most of the biscuits are wearing clothing in garish colors of either purple, green, red, or yellow, and have padded their midsections. They are chanting something as the bow.

Chanting: Uh…oooooooh………Uh…ooooooooh………
Stewie: ……When the world is mine, your death shall be quick and painless.
Bunny: :bored:…………………It's a start.
DungeonJman

02-15-07, 09:26 PM		*seal comes back*

Evil DungeonJ: *while frozen*

heh heh heh. Normally that would work, but the seal wasn't designed by a villain.

I believe that you use a weaker version of this seal on me in your head all of the time, and you used it on me before.

OOKaizer: And how do you break it?

OODungeonJ: Well there's a funny story about that...

OOKaizer: YOU DIDN'T DEVELOP A WAY TO GET OUT !?!?

OODungeonJ: No, i developed this to be a seal with only ONE way out of it. Since evil is known for breaking every seal used, or getting out of your head when you're out cold, i made it so that nothing can actually break it or release it, not even the incapacitation or cessation of the flow of magic by the sealer. The only way to get me out of here is with the Yin-Yang Yo Yos. But unfortunately, OOQuincey's got em both and we can't get em back.

*Rose comes back with a book and a couple of insane redshirts who are in the process of being turned into abberrations*

Rose: Well, since he's not here, i guess i might as well use that Power Draining Ritual that he wanted to set up. :devil:

OODungeonJ: If this was normal Rose i'd be fine, but as it is...

I'm soooo dead! :(

OOQuincey: :mad: What do you think you're doing?

Rose: Simple, you want them to be at level one so you can beat them silly right, i'm just making it so that he'll have no way of breaking the rules that you have set down.

OOQuincey: But, but... Darn it! He knows me too well for my own good

*OOQuincey leaves*
rampant

02-15-07, 10:07 PM		Sithis - What don't you trust me?

Teiza - No I just don't sleep.

Sithis - You eat.

Teiza - Yes, i noted that dependence. I think it comes from mother's side.

Sithis - You nap.

Teiza - That's just lethargy from over eating without enough energy burn. The staff made it way too easy to hunt.
DungeonJman

02-15-07, 10:38 PM		*Rose performs the entire ritual and it fails*

Rose: What the *checks book* Wait, this should be fhtagn, not fhgtan!

NAAAAALFEIN!

Well at least i can redo the ritual.

*begins again*
Kaizer_Ryu

02-15-07, 11:17 PM		OOQuigley: *looking at OOQuincey* :confused: Who the hell's that?

OOKaizer: *shrugs* I dunno...

OOUrial: Oh, I called in some special help.

OOQuincey: Hey.

OOUrial: Take off that ridiculous disguse.

OOQuincey: Silence! I do what I wish!

*costume removal*

King Torg: 'Sup, biatches?

OOKaizer: Holy crap! It's King Torg - *quickly* AllhailKingTorg - from Kobolds Ate My Baby!

Evil DungeonJ: Who's King Torg?

King Torg: *taps his foot in annoyance*

Evil DungeonJ: What? I just want to know who you are.

King Torg: You didn't say "All hail King Torg". That's another point against the Horrible Death Chart, peasant.

Evil DungeonJ: Just because I said said King Torg without hailing you?

King Torg: That's two.

OOKaizer: Better get your act together. King Torg's - AllhailKingTorg - painful deaths are just that. Painful.

Evil DungeonJ: Just for saying King Torg? What do I have to do to sign up?!

King Torg: :bored: Three.

*much later*

OOUrial: We warned you.

Evil DungeonJ: :weep: You're my new idol...

King Torg: :rolleyes: Yeah, that's great.

The view zooms out to show Evil DungeonJ connected to every painful torture device known to abberation kind at once, most of which are active.

OOQuigley: Wow. 14 points on the Painful Death Chart. That's gotta be a new record.

*sounds of horrible screaming*

-----

Bunny: :bored: Now, normally I'm all for King Torg - AllhailKingTorg - , but since Evil DungeonJ is part of an entity, he can't die. Therefore, this is pointless.

13: For you maybe. :evillaugh
rampant

02-15-07, 11:38 PM		Dorvos - Hmmmmmmmm

King Torg - Beat it kid you're bothering me. *kick*

*slice*

King Torg is now shorter by exactly one foot.

A large, angular, silver humanoid rears up behind Dorvos.

King Torg - I hate psychics!
Kaizer_Ryu

02-15-07, 11:54 PM		OOC: King Torg - AllhailKingTorg - cannot be beaten. It's just not possible. :P ;)

IC:

Vladamere: Why the obsession with tentacles?

Deis: I dunno. Why not?

Vladamere: Point taken. Wanna go play with dads pets?

Deis: Sure. I'm still trying to teach Sparky to sit.

Vladamere: ...Sparky?

Deis: You know, Uncle Volrath's new Chuul/Darkmantle/Chaos Beast/Lightning Elemental hybrid?

Vladamere: :uh-huh: ...did you have to give it a cute name?

Deis: What? I can't help it...
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 12:05 AM		OOC: Stay tuned for a HUGE change in the Elina/Sarah/Tirmek/Lilly storyline!

DUM DUM DUM!

:-)

And also sympathy for Kaizer_Ryu for the fact he's not buried in snow like the rest of us.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-16-07, 12:29 AM		OOC: 6 some inches of snow in as many hours last Monday morning is more than enough for me, thank you. Though I'm pretty sure Rei and Urial aren't happy the roads are clear. ;)

Now if the temperature would at least rise to Real Cold instead of the Damn Cold (verging on Friggin' Cold) we've got now, that would be something.

IC:

Nina: :( Why do they keep running away?

Lenneth: I think it has something to do with our parents and the lifespan of a Redshirt.

Nina: But we just want to help...

The two are carrying a case of Aerith's Snapple Potions of Healing and attempting to distribute them to the few Redshirts that have survived to their first paycheck.

Lenneth: Perhaps a new tactic is in order. *whisper*

Nina: But-!

Lenneth: Only until they figure it out. We can't help if they don't trust us, right?

Nina: ...okay...

They sneak up on the next Redshirt.

Lenneth: NOW!

*TACKLE*

Lenneth pins him as Nina opens the bottle and pours it down his throat.

Nina: :D There, see? All better.

The Redshirt begins convulsing wildly as the tainted potion courses through his system.

Nina: :eek: What's wrong?!

Lenneth: :headexplo STEWIE!!!!!

-----

Stewie: Blast! Someone had taken my test samples! This will set me back weeks!

Aerith: Oh, Stewie, you want one?

Stewie: I'm on to you, you horrid woman! Return my concoctions post-haste or you shall suffer the consequences!

Aerith: Looks like someone's cranky. *picks him up*

Stewie: Unhand me you tyrranical matriarch!

-----

Nina: :weep: I'm sorry, Mr. Redshirt!

The man does not respond as he flees down the hall, screaming.

Lenneth: He could at least have thanked you for curing him...
rampant

02-16-07, 12:31 AM		OOC: I'll take the snow!!!
--------------------------------------

Dorvos took his foot off, never said anything about beating him.

King Torg - I'll get you for this!

Dorvos - Hmmmmmmmm

astral construct proceeds to play hacysac with Torg
Paulon

02-16-07, 12:39 AM		OOC: Stay tuned for a HUGE change in the Elina/Sarah/Tirmek/Lilly storyline!

DUM DUM DUM!

:-)

*wonders where to find the time to do more than start the intro idea for another char*

And also sympathy for Kaizer_Ryu for the fact he's not buried in snow like the rest of us.

Lucky for some. I'm hoping that it'll be cool enough here to sleep under a sheet tonight. Not too likely though.
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 12:57 AM		OOC: This is going to be a controversial post and I welcome a certain someone *stares at Kaizer_Ryu to write around it if he desires but this is an attempt to shake up the setting.

I accept full responsibility for the matter as it happens.

This is in homage of Skies of Arcadia along with Final Fantasy 12 and during the battles, please make an effort to note any deaths will be permanent except for the one noted exception above at KR's discretion.

IC:

The Council of Wyrms

13 Dragons sit on the council, 5 for the Chromatic Dragons, 5 for the Metallic Dragons, and 3 for the Gemstone Dragons of Law, Chaos, and Pure Neutrality

Gold Dragon King: The issue of the human's expansion despite our best efforts has become too much of a danger. The Prophecy fortells the beginning of another tragedy like the Giants super weapon if they advance further.

Blue Dragon King: We have successfully taken our Reidra directly after the destruction of the Inspired ruling class. The people have acclimated nicely to our reign but that doesn't necessarily give us any advantage.

Silver Dragon Queen: We need to reconsider our policy. The humans are not the Giants of old and unlikely to be so inclined to conquest as us.

Red Dragon King: Their hundred year war proves them incapable of being trusted. If they were worthy of enlightenment then they would have saw through our machinations.

Amethyst Dragon Queen: That makes no sense!

Black Dragon King: Our choice is clear. We have been building back up Riedra since the start of the war and our forces are primed to take by force what we have not been able to take by treachery.

Green Dragon Queen: They will hate us forever if we take their freedom directly and never stop striving to repel us.

White Dragon King: We can repulsseeeeeeeeee them until they learn to submit to usssssss.

Gold Dragon King: So it is decided. The end of human self-rule is at hand.

***

Karrnath

King Kaius: And so it begins....

*The vampire monarch stared at the vast fleet of Riedran airships filled with Seren Dragon soldiers that poured over his city*

*Boiling oil and crystal balls containing Fireball spells were dropped down upon the masses of undead forces even as hundreds of arrows rained down from the galleons onto their troopers from a safe distance*

King Kaius: Ready my blade, armor, and nightmare...

Chancellor Draco: I think not your Majesty.

*The Chancellor transformed before the warlord's eyes into a Ancient Red Dragon before breathing down its fire onto the vampire king whom lasted long enough to take a spear from the wall to plunge it deep down into he dragon's heart before his flaming skeleton was left to burn in the sun when the ceiling collapsed on his palace*

***

Thrane

The Palace

Coronation Ceremony

Queen Lisa Ir'Wynern: An army of Dragons? The Argonessan wouldn't dare....

Pontiff Jaela: I fear that this is indeed the case. We have no sooner reunited this land than they work to tear down everything we've managed to build thus far.

Queen Lisa Ir'Wynern: I have prepared for this day since they decided to blacken my daughter's name. GRYPHON RIDERS! TO ARMS!

Pontiff Jaela: Terra is not with you at this time Lisa, you should note that she is undergoing her monthly druidic enchantment. You should wait for her return.

Queen Lisa Ir'Wynern: People are dying Pontiff! If I am to be the Queen then who else should be the first into battle and the last to leave?

Pontiff Jaela: I give you my strongest blessings Lisa but even I can't say if they will hold up against the might of Dragon magic.

Queen Lisa Ir'Wynern: We must have faith in the Silver Flame.

Pontiff Jaela: Go with my blessing. No woman can change Fate.....but she can fight it.

***

Aundair

Queen Aurala: I for one welcome our Draconic Overlords and would like to offer this signed order of Surrender!

Pyro the Red Dragon: We actually weren't going to invade your...

Queen Aurala: I....SAID we surrender!

Pyro the Red Dragon: But....oh fine.

Queen Aurala: Now I have to go put on a beret and long coat before waging a partisan resistance campaign against you.

Pyro the Red Dragon: wait a minute...

Queen Aurala: RADIO FREE AUNDAIR!

***

Breland

Princess Sarah: Father, we must rouse our forces to repel the invaders?

*the entire castle shudders while the King's Wands battle valiantly against the seemingly endless hosts of enemy Dragons*

*King Steve meanwhile plays golf*

King Steve: Oh my, are we being attacked?

Princess Sarah: YES!

King Steve: That's not very nice of them. Tell them that I fine them all one gold coin.

Princess Sarah: ERRRRRR!

***

The Forgotten Freedom

Rose: I knew this day was coming in the end.

Zella: You might have...you know...SHARED IT with the rest of us.

Rose: I did, repeatedly.

Zella: Oh MAYBE you mentioned there was an unstoppable huge army of Dragons, Riedrans, and Serens coming to attack Khovaire once or a few dozen times but who the hell pays any attention to that.

Rose: Ugh.

Zella: We'll just repulse them like we did the last few hundred godlike menaces.

Rose: I'm afraid that's not going to happen.

Zella: What do you mean.

Rose: The Dragons control the Old Magic. Our greatest weapons will no affect against their ranks.

Zella: So what exactly do you intend to do.

*A gigantic Gold Dragon heads directly towards their airship*

Rose: Fight them as long as we can.

*gets behind the wheel and reveals his Lyrander mark*

Rose: RAMMING SPEED.

***

Eldeen Reaches

Terra: I can't get any peace. Somethings.....darkening my visions.

Khyber: Yes, that would be me.

Terra: YOU! TIAMAT! Finally, we have the chance to settle things!

Khyber: Poor foolish young woman, you always thought that our battle was to be physical. No, it exists between mortals, not our own powers.

Terra: I think you'll find my power more than enough! I refuse to use mortals as pawns!

Khyber: That is why you will always remain weak as a goddess.

Terra: Better to live as one of them than like you!

*her spells did not come to her though*

Khyber: You know so little of your own power. But because you live as one of them, you are subject to the same things they are.

Terra: I'm immortal.

Khyber: Your current body is an incarnation like mine but death is not mortal's greatest trial. If you are truly be different from the rest of the Host then you have to endure pain.

Terra: I LOST MY MOTHER.

Khyber: And now you lose more.

Terra: NO! I'll stop it.

Khyber: My dear.....I am not a book villainess. I would not tell you of what has happened if there was time to prevent it. Your wife died ten minutes ago.

***

Thrane

Ten Minutes ago

*Lisa, battle scarred and her amror scorched battles above Flamekeep even as Gregory gives a valiant defense on the back of a Great Gryphon*

*Lisa leaps off her own one just before it is consumed in flames to jump into the mouth of the Red Dragon King*

Lisa: Terra. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to leave you.

*She drives her holy avenger into his brain even as she asks the Flame for a miracle....at the offering of her own life*

Red Dragon King: ROARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

*the Dragon's flame consumes Lisa even as her armor melts down into his body and poisons the Dragon's blood....killing the Ancient leader*

***

Terra: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOO!

***

Forgotten Freedom

Lilly: DAD!

*Rose fires two crossbow bolts into the eyes of the Great Wyrm that claws the side of the Forgotten Freedom, the Dragon impaled with it's mast*

Auric, the Gold Dragon Duke: You will find such piddling little things do nothing against me Bard.

*lilly charges forward into the Dragon's eye and pierces it with his own holy avenger*

Lilly: I've got it!

Rose: LILLY NO!

*It is Zella who tackles Lilly away even as she disappears under the blow of the gigantic monster's tail that comes down onto her*

Rose: Tell everyone to abandon ship.

Lilly: Dad.

*Rose turns the ship towards the Demon Waste mountains and then puts the massive vessel to full power to crash the creature to its doom*

Rose: No one is going to take my lover away from me and live.

Jarlot: You have a family son.

*Rose is then knocked over the side of the head by Jarlot's blade but*

Jarlot: And its the Captain who goes down with the ship.

*Jarlot hands Rose over to Lilly while the Dragon continues to struggle with his impalement*

Jarlot: Tell Aerith I'll be spending a lot more time with her where I'm going.....provided I can hire a very good lawyer.

***

Forgotten Freedom Lifeboat

Elina: *eyes tearing up as the first coherent thought appears to her in months* MOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMM!

Sarah: HOWLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!

*The ship collides with the mountain and explodes in a titanic detonation of the Forgotten Freedom*

Tirmek: GAHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

*the terrible explosion of black flames with Captain Jarlot's death tear up through the sky as the Chosen One of Khyber perishes to save the lives of his crew*

*And the black flames turn silver before vanishing*

Lilly: I....

Rose: Zella....*struggles unconscious* *awakens to stare at the burning remains of his ship*

Lilly: *for nothing else to say* We'll get another ship....

Ivy: Mom
rampant

02-16-07, 01:46 AM		Dorvos - Hmmmmmrmrmrmrmrmrmrmrmrrmrmr

The closed third eye upon the boy's forehead is begining to spark and writhe.

Serene - DORVOS!

Satnak - MY SON!

Dorvos - HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

The eye opens revealing a glowing green eye. The pupil contains swirling motes of every color glimmering in and out of existance against its blackness.

Dorvos - Mom, please its mine now.

Serene - You're too young! no don't!

Satnak - He's going to go anyway, his chances improve dramatically if he has it.

Serene - I want all of you back safe.:(

Satnak - I promise;)
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 02:05 AM		OOC: Remember the Dragon takeover post effects no plots that take before it chronologically.

Something that DungeonJman was confused on when he tried to end our Mordain Fleshweaver plot so he could do his.
rampant

02-16-07, 03:41 AM		Teiza - Where's Tirmek?
-----------------------------

Tirmek - Hahahahahaha (Sitting on the gold D. king's bleeding corpse.)

Blue D. king - What the hell!?

A giant Stalactite impaled the Golden Wyrm when Tirmek made his entrance. The other dragons shuffle towards places with less interesting ceilings.

Tirmek - Hahahahahaha

Black D. king - Its that little mongrel again! Bad enough he's defying his own fate, but the little monster is bringing it here!

Tirmek - Do you know what the difference between me and any other psychic you've ever seen in this room?

Green D. King - Trust me it isn't your little crossdressing habit.

Tirmek - I can detonate the ambient energitic effects in an area. Its a basic technique where I'm from, but you've never heard of it in any great detail. I'm willing to bet you have all the effects chained into the old enchantments, and the nodes here. Also I bet you have no idea how to armor your affects against my brand of tampering. So basically you lot are sitting on a pile of multiple megaton yeild explosives, and I have the detonator. Now be very careful about what you think next.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-16-07, 04:08 AM		Achika: *malicious glee* You feel it?! That is what you are!

All reason gone from her mind, Terra's form began to warp. Drawn to the Material Plane through sheer will alone, her true form as one of the Sovereigns was revealed. Pure shadowmatter flowed out of and around her, shrouding her in a dome of endless dark. From it erupted a terrifying sight. The visage of an Great Shadow Wyrm roared in fury, cracking the surface of the earth.

Achika: Seek your vengeance and bring the world down around you!

What once was Terra lashed out in a fury unknown since the death of Syberis. The tide turned in an instant, as her cry of dispair and anger tore through the legions that had brought such an unbearble loss to her. But that was not the end. In her anger, she tore asunder their very souls.

At long last, a true Goddess walked the world of Eberron. The last and greatest of the old decrees had been shattered.

Terra's mind bore nothing but hate. Hate at those who had taken that which she held so dear. Hate at the world that seemed hell bent on destroying all she strove for. Hate at those who refused to leave her children in peace. Hate at the one who had started it all. No light. No memories of better days. Hate was all she knew.

Until she reached Thrane.

It was there she saw the remains of the Ancient Red Dragon that had slain the single greatest thing that had ever happened to her. As she readied to renew her rampage, preparing to unleash Deific magics that would make the Rajah's quake, a single voice brought her to a halt.

Lisa: STOP!

And stop she did. She had not heard this voice with her ears nor her mind, but with her heart. It was Lisa, it had to be. No one else had this kind of effect on her.

Lisa: Please...stop. This isn't you...

Finally, the Wyrm regained it's senses.

Terra: L...Lisssssssssssa?

Lisa: Please...no more. I can't bear to see you like this...

Terra: *with some difficulty* Where...are you?!

Lisa: I am with you. I promised on our wedding day I would remain by you till the end of all things. I hold to that now.

The maelstrom that raged about Terra's draconic form abated somewhat.

Lisa: I know how you feel. The pain is immesurable. But this is not you. Not anymore.

Slowly but surely, the darkness began to lift.

Terra: *sadly, dejectedly* It is only because of you. I could spend all of eternity trying, but nothing I could ever hope to do could possibly repay your gift to me. All I could do is offer my heart, my soul, and my undying love. But it always seemed so inadequate...

Lisa: *giggle* Silly girl. I feel the same way. I was alone, angry, and quickly spiralling towards my own destruction. When I met you...I felt as though I had found someone special. The simple act of hearing your voice brought a calm to my soul I had not known before. You say I saved you, but know that it was only because you saved me. That is your gift to me that I can never repay.

The world around Terra went quiet. The Great Shadow Wyrm sat motionless on the battlefield of Thrane, a few tears rolling down the scaled cheeks. After a while, a bright light surrounded her. When it faded, Terra had returned to her original form. She stood slowly and dried her eyes. The time for tears was later. Her children needed her. Her friends needed her.

Terra placed her hand on her chest and felt the warmth of Lisa's presense. Tiamat was right. She would remain weak as long as she denied her need for mortals. But Tiamat was dead wrong on the path she would take. Already, her power had grown exponentially.

A single life, given to her willingly out of true love.

A gift devoted wholly to healing the gaping wound this days events had left in her heart.

A act so selfless as to put all other Paladin's to shame.

Terra: My love...thank you.

Mocking claps came from a few paces behind her.

Achika: Well, well. Seems I underestimated her. To bring a rampaging goddess to a halt, that is something else.

Terra: ...

Achika: What's the matter? No snide comments? No empty defiance?

Terra barely even turned her head to look at Achika.

Terra: This is my story, and you're not part of it.

Before she could respond, several of Achika's hairs were cut from her bangs. For only a fleeting second, she had sensed something pass her. And then, Terra was gone. She had found her powersource. One hitherto untouched by deific hands. The links of the heart.
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 04:17 AM		Diamond Dragon king: Have a care Rakashasa for your race is not our equal. You are used to playing amongst the same game board as we but it does not make us fear you.

White Dragon King: Detonate your psychic powers for it will not kill us.

Blue Dragon King: Even if you successfully did so then it would simply trigger our contingencies.

Black Dragon King: All of Eberron depends on Dragon strength to run and keep turning but we have made it so necessary. Your world would be reduced to a ashous cinder with no life left upon it. More akin to Xoriat than the Green world that you face now.

Green Dragon Queen: And with a simple spell, your little Sarahs life is linked to ours, utterly and completely.

Silver Dragon Queen: I sympathize truly but only the Promise Breaker can destroy us. This is not your destiny Tirmek of the Rakashasa. Yours lies upon a different path.

Diamond Dragon king: We cannot be bullied or intimidated or coerced. It took all the epic magical power of the Forgotten Freedom to kill the Golden Dragon Duke, the Chosen of Tira Mirron to kill the Red Dragon King. He was the only one of our kind to die during the invasion.

Tirmek: But....

Diamond Dragon king: A chosen dying is about the only suitable magical sacrifice possible to bring about the end to one of our kind. Our physical bodies aren't even really us anymore. You, Tirmek, are special and might be able to kill one of us at the cost of your life. The same for Satnak perhaps.

Black Dragon King: Khovaire is ours and it will not be taken away from us so lightly as you may think it possible. Go back to your world in peace, Future King of the Lords of Dust. We acknowledge you as a worthy enemy but this display of brute force will not avail you.

Green Dragon Queen: We will even reward you for your brutality by stating that Sarah is dying thanks to her Dragon Mark. She just simply hasn't noticed it yet.

White Dragon King: don't forget to clean up your mess on the way out.

***

Sharn

Ketler: Okay, building the Forgotten Freedom III is going to take some pretty esoteric parts. If Tirmek were here, he might be able to help.

Maladren: What do you need?

Ketler: Well, the heart of a Balor to start with.

Maladren: *snort* Is that all?

Ketler: Wood from Aerenal's Sacred Trees.

Maladren: Easily done.

Ketler: ....in the Plane of Law.

Maladren: Again, why is this a problem?

Sarah: Rose hasn't spoken in a while.

Elina: Booo?

Sarah: I think it's even worse than you actually. He's just....well playing System of a Down over and over again while crying.

Ketler: By the way, we need a new Captain until he's better.

Chance: AHE....

Ketler: First rule, not chance

Chance: Dammit.
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 04:25 AM		OOC: Nice romantic bit there Kaizer, I have to say though that it needed more ANGST!

:-)

Terra: WHAT!? HOW CAN IT HAVE MORE ANGST!

and cowbell. Definitely needed more cowbell.
DungeonJman

02-16-07, 07:50 AM		Evil DungeonJ: Man, this stinks! Rose turned back to good or something and i'm being tortured!

OODungeonJ: *on the one part of the ship that survived, inside of the seal*

Ok, since your plans failed, can you LET ME OUT OF THIS THING!!!

Evil DungeonJ: No! That's the only thing i have left for any sort of happiness!
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 07:59 AM		Evil Rose: Hardly.

Rose: Then who the hell am I?

Evil Rose: My Butler.

*Clue theme played*

Rose: Shucks
ratslinky

02-16-07, 08:14 AM		OORatslinky: Hope I haven't missed the entire invasion

*Gaz is surrounded by dragons all just waiting for him to move so they can unleash their fury. The second in command of the Black dragons who goes by the name of Eman'durarak stands before him ready to kill in one strike*

Eman'durarak: For your crimes young Gaz you have been sentenced to death I will carry out the execution personally

Gaz: *Begins to :evillaugh * You think that I rely only on the power of The Faceless One you are truly a fool my power might not kill you but Esabar's certainly will

Eman'durarak: Even she cannot save you now come I will let her have one shot any spell she likes it will not harm me

Esabar: Oh I wouldn't be so sure *She starts to focus and power starts to flow from everywhere it gathers at a single point when she couldn't hold onto it any longer she unleashed it sending a single beam of energy so powerful that it could destroy half of Everice right at the dragons brain it flue threw the air and hit it dead center where it simply fizzled out*

Eman'durarak: You see you are know match for me now die *It's claw came back then struck faster than lightning it pierced Esabar's clothing it pierced her flesh it pierced her heart and then finally her soul*

Gaz: *As Gaz watched himself bleed to death and at the same time saw his sisters soul shatter he was filled with a since of loss that he had never felt before he remembered when his only friend in life before he came to the Forgotten Freedom died stoned to death for being his friend he had felt pain then but it was nothing compared to this and as he watched the pieces of her soul get blown in every direction he lost all since of grief and was instead filled by rage at the people who had done this to him at the people who worshiped them and he felt life return to him*

*The dragons watched in awe as this mere mortal who had a hole in him stand up and look directly at them all at the same time. It was a weird feeling to have yourself seen threw like that as if he could see your past your present and most of all your future. And he gave you the impression that your future was going to be a short one indeed. Eman'durarak sprang into action slashing with two of his claw and at the same time he breathed his acid all over Gaz. Gaz felt slightly detached as his body dissolved in front of him and when his body was no more he realized he didn't need one he would simply grow another and that is what he did. The dragons watched in awe as Gaz's body started to regrow at a point just beside his old one*

Eman'durarak: No it cannot be no one can do that. DIE MORTAL. *He lashed out with all his fury but this time his attacks never seemed to connect just when he thought he had him Gaz would disappear and reappear somewhere else. And then Gaz was beside him and to late he notice Gaz drawing power of the arcane to him to late did he see it was becoming the form of his worst nightmare to late did he think to look away. He died screaming.*
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 08:16 AM		OOC: Impressive Ratslinky.

;-)

Again, don't feel restricted from beating the crap out of dragons but I like the idea that this occupation isn't going to be so easily repulsed as all the previous ones.

Unless there's an overwhelming reason not to, I think Khovaire is under Argonessan control (with the original boundaries still there) for the forseeable future.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-16-07, 08:18 AM		Queen Aurala: Now I have to go put on a beret and long coat before waging a partisan resistance campaign against you.

Pyro the Red Dragon: wait a minute...

Queen Aurala: RADIO FREE AUNDAIR!
13: Ah, Aundair. It was so easy once I realized that lazze-faire fruityness was both and annoyance and a good cover for being plucky.
*the Dragon's flame consumes Lisa even as her armor melts down into his body and poisons the Dragon's blood....killing the Ancient leader*
Lisa stands on that slightly odd plane just beyond life. In front of her is the Red Dragon. They stare at each other for a moment, blinking. Then their gaze is drawn down to a small, black bunny holding a sword and a flamethrower.

Bunny: Okay, Scythe-boy, your turn.

Death: DO YOU HAVE TO CALL ME THAT?
Jarlot: Tell Aerith I'll be spending a lot more time with her where I'm going.....provided I can hire a very good lawyer.
Reman: The very best, sir.

*BOOOOOOOOM!*
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-16-07, 08:20 AM		A silver clad angel stood over the reckage of the forgotten freedom. his alabaster wings beat slowly as he scanned the ashes, reaching out with this mind he could feel the last moments of those trapped within. a silver tear rolled down his cheek.

and then somthing stirred. the ashes rose as somthing emerged. its black armour was torn open in places, and crimson blood dripped from his many wounds. his face was badly burnt on the one side, as he emerged the angel recognised the figure.

Naz'roth.

The Figure rose, spreading out its blackfeathered wings, his eyes blazing with emerald light. black flames rose over his armour, fusing it back into place. the wounds healed in an instant and the burn faded to be replaced with alabaster skin.

behind him others emerged from the reckage, also badly injured. Sithis, leaning heavily on Feal-Thas, and his staff and finally Tara,one arm clutched to her chest.

Nuar decended and landed before them.

Naz'roth: if you've come for a fight Naur then its a really bad time.

Naur: *raising his hands Defensivly* Im not here to quarrel Naz'roth. The Dragons have gone to far. I've been sent to represent the intrests of the Azure sky.

Naz'roth: your here to propose an Alliance?

Naur: yes.

Naz'roth: Its been a long time since the fall Naur, and even longer since we last met face to face. so excuse me if im a bit astounded. YOUR PROPOSING AN ALLIANCE NOW?

Naur: yes.

Naz'roth: so, you high and mighty angels, After millenia of not getting involved on eberron NOW decide to help us. NOW. *suddenly becoming quieter* I know why your doing this, you're afraid. your afraid they'll move against you. your so afraid of them that you'll ally with ME.

Naur: so you'll accept?

Naz'roth: Of course. i've been wanting to get back at those glorified lizards for centuries. but first, get your minions to take Tara, Feal-Thas and Sithis to the Other survivors.
We're going to plan our counter offensive.

Naur: *sly smile* you've got a plan havnt you?

Naz'roth: *smirk* you could say that.
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 08:27 AM		OOC: Bravo, Lord Cale to both of those.

A cookie for you.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-16-07, 08:34 AM		At long last, a true Goddess walked the world of Eberron. The last and greatest of the old decrees had been shattered.
Elminster (wearing a large foam finger that says "FR #1"): :w00t:

Bunny: Okay, who let him in the commentary booth?

13: We actually have a slight problem.

Bunny: I don't have a problem. The one's who've died so far weren't the best at killing.

13: Yeah, but the Dramadars are wearing out.

Silver: Lisa's dead. :weep: Moment of silence.………………

OOcat: Just means you'll find an even more disturbing way. :bored:

Silver: Oh, yeah. :D I forgot about that.

13: So what happens to all those underdecks?

OOcat: They're their own demi-plane now, completely removed from all effects on this world. Allthough I must say, I never thought I'd see this…………
*********
The half-toasters and the half-biscuits stand on the same side as they stare down the dragon army.

Dragon General: (stares at the Teletubby costumes and the aluminum-covered cardboard armor) :confused: I don't know whether to be scared or to laugh.

Then the half-biscuits start up a freaky chant. A face appears in the sun, and their in the giggle of a human infant. Four glows appear in front of the army, each resolving into a huge, fat, garishly colored monster with big ears and a thing that looks like an antenna atop its head.

Dragon General: Afraid. Definitely afraid.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-16-07, 08:47 AM		Kitten: I have the strangest feeling that I've missed 5 years and another major :censored:-fest back home.

Roosevelt: I wouldn't worry about that now.

Puck: Yeah, Kanatash Springer is on!

There is a giant commotion as various super-heroes (OOC: I'm going to skip a bit) and crew gather around a big-screen TV in an animé-style stampede.

Kitten: What about the villains?

Bruce: They have their own TV.

The Kanatash Springer Show (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O-7bTNFRRY8&mode=related&search=)

Kitten: Lilly……Rose………Zella……Ivy……

Puck: Yeah, this family's on alot. You should have been here when they revealed that Rose's half-sister Terra has had kids with the princess of Thrane.
DungeonJman

02-16-07, 08:54 AM		*begins playing a piano*

Evil DungeonJ: How'd you get a piano in there?

OODungeonJ: I'm still a E.B.N.E. . Besides, i've got nothing better to while i'm in here so i might as well practice my piano anyway.
ratslinky

02-16-07, 08:54 AM		OORatslinky: I'm fine with beating the crap out of dragons but in this case I saw an opportunity for character development and I also wanted to show that as Eman'durarak was second in command of the Black dragons he was almost godlike hence the destruction of Esabar. Now it's late but I've just thought of something funny

IC:

Narrator: While most of Korvaire is under control of the dragons Brokenblade Castle still holds out due to as the survivors The First Great Act Of King Steve. This is what happened

*Just after King Steve says he'll have to fine everyone for fighting in the palace*

King Steve: *walking down the corridors with an empty bag in his hand he walks out to the fighting and calmly says* Didn't anyone read the sign no fighting in my castle

Random red dragon: And where does it say that?

King Steve: Over there *points to a sign on the wall of the courtyard* so pay up *holds out the bag. By this time all the fighting has stopped and the dragons and the Kings Wands are looking incredulously at King Steve*

One of the Lawful dragons: Mortal laws do not apply to us

*one of the quick thinking kings wands quickly casts prestidigitation to paint onto the sign "This rule extends to mortals, immortals, gods, near immortals and all other forms of life and unlife*

Lawful dragon: Oh ok here ya go flips him a gold coin and flys off the rest of the lawful dragons do the same the neutral dragons fly away without paying shaking their head and the chaotic dragons say

Chaotic dragon: Whadda yah gonna do about it punk huh huh *at this point the greatly reduced number of dragons get overwhelmed by the Kings Wands who then have to pay two gold coin for fighting twice*
DungeonJman

02-16-07, 08:57 AM		Evil DungeonJ: Wait a minute... *reads book* Alright, i'm going to see if i can cast Sacrifice Elminster !

OODungeonJ: But you're not a mage!

Evil DungeonJ: You don't need to be one to cast this spell. :devil:
rampant

02-16-07, 10:59 AM		Tirmek - SARAH! Where is she!

Sarah - Mom:weep:

Tirmek - :weep:

The young 'zerker is consoled somewhat by the presence of her sage. But no one is there who can ease the turmoil of the Tharmis heir.
---------------------------------------------------------------------

Ketty - Lets go we gotta in-

Serene - (sweetly) Not a bloody chance in eternity. You get your butt right back to bed.
----------------------------------------------

Satnak - Why can't they ever leave us in peace?

Dorvos - Because they fear us mother.

Satnak - LEts get home and cleaned up. Corre and Teiza are going nuts.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-16-07, 03:28 PM		Achika stood there for a moment, trying to conceal her fear that Terra might actually be more powerful than her. But then she dismissed the thought.

Achika: Minions! To me.

Nothing happens.

Achika: Minions!! Minions!!!! Some heads are going to be rolling if I don't see them soon!

Slowly, a lone dragon slips out of a nearby bush, cowering in fear. But not of Achika, but of something that wasn't yet seen.

Achika: Report!

Dragon: It was a horrible slaughter. They came out of n-nowhere, just a b-b-bunch of blurs that we didn't notice unt-t-t-til too late.

Achika: Ninjas. But they shouldn't have been a match for a dragon.

Dragon: They had glowing weapons—

Achika: Laser swords.

Dragon: —could project forcefields without casting spells—

Achika: Psychic.

Dragon: —and rode on the backs of large reptiles.

Achika: Psychic robot ninjas with laser swords who are also riding dinosaurs. Curses! My minions aren't rated against that level of cool. Was there anything else?

A patch of grass near Achika suddenly catches flame.

Warforged: He forgot to mention the heat vision.

OOC: Though this post is done, the idea isn't quite. I'll finish it up later, in the meantime feel free to use Achika (teleporting away or whatnot), just don't have her massecre the warforged or anything.
rampant

02-16-07, 04:32 PM		Hyrd - Nooooooooooooo!

Ivy - What's wrong?

Hyrd - Portal gone, Hyrd can't get to Hyrd lair without portal. Hyrd miss fuzzy fishy:weep:

Ivy - (i.h.h. how can he be so goddam cute!) Awww Don't worry Hyrd, Ivy is here, Ivy cuddle Hyrd(i.h.h. gah! now he's got me doing it)

Hyrd - *sniff* :)
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-16-07, 04:46 PM		Naz'roth, Naur, The remaining crew of the Forgotten Freedom and The Various Archangels and various Lords of Syrania stood about a table. on it was a large map of eberron.

Naz'roth: Our first priority is Sharn, Its a Manifest zone to Syrania which would allow us to erect much more stable portals there. once there we need to pull out any survivors or civillians, we need to astablish a foot hold there if we're going to retake Korvoire.

He waves a hand, zooming in to create three dimensional image of Sharn

Naz'roth: our first priority will be City Centre, from there we'll have the best advantage over the City. Terra, I need you and Selaphiel to lead the Forces here. we'll be moving in small groups, because speed is our best advantage against the Dragons. At exactly the same time, we'll have to attack several other positions, this will divide the dragons attention. So i want Haniel, Zafrire, Rose, Tirmek and Sarah to attack Skyway. this will most likely have the largest concentration of Dragons due to their natural greed.

He then gestures to Northedge

Naz'roth: Eiael, Gaz, Esabar and Sithis will be leading this force, instead of attack from above like in Skyway and the Central Plataeu this time we'll be opening a portal at the bottom of the city. by varying our tactics here and at Dura we'll make it more difficult for the dragons to predict our assualts.
The Dura Team will be led by Eistibus and Eth, we'll have Eth unleash a bolt of distorted time here before the assualt, it'll play havoc with the dragons magical abilities.
The Cliffside forces will be Taken by Feal-Thas, Tara and Ouestucati, they'll Feal-Thas and Tara will attack from portals attack from above with two thirds of the force while Ouestucati will attack from the sea.

Satnak: what about the rest of us?

Naz'roth: we wont deploy anyone else until we have the city proper. opening portals and sustianing them for a whole battle is too much of a drain when we're not at a manifest zone. so likely the dragons will know we're coming.
before the assualt begins proper we're going to create several distractions in several area's to stop the dragons bringing in reinforcements.

Terra: what kind of distractions are we talking about here?

Naz'roth: as you know, it took a lot of energy for the Dragons to bind the Rakshasa Rajah and my kin. so, to divide their attention im going to free several of them-

Naur: we cant just free the Rajah, they're more dangerous than the dragons.

Naz'roth: ah, but after being imprisoned for all those millenia the Rajah will deffinetly not be very happy about they're imprisonment. i have a feeling they'll be more than happy to cause havoc amungst the dragons.

Naur: before you continue, I'd just like to state, how is it we're only using angel forces here? i thought you still had an army Naz'roth. and those Half-Dragons that the one known as Sa'vor created, what of them?

Naz'roth: the only remaining Half-Dragon is Feal-Thas. the others where destroyed when the demi plane collapsed, my forces also where destroyed.

Naur: what about the Fallen, how many of them made it out?

Naz'roth: *scowl* The fallen have been dead for millenia. most of the eight hundred that survived the civil war where killed by the dragons in the age of demons. their energy was mostly scattered. The ones that weren't killed where imprisoned or banished.

Terra: couldnt you free them as well?

Naz'roth: it would take far too much time to find them all, The only ones i could free would be Suriel, Uvael and Cassiel. Since i already know where they're bound and how to free them. If we where to unbind them we would have to do it before we free the Rajah contained in Haka'torvhak and the one bound under Ashtakala, there's another bound at Adar also but it would take too much effort to free it. There's another thing i would like to mention before we can continue, if we could open The Pit-

Naur: Naz'roth. we are not going to open The Pit. no matter how much you argue about it's uses its just not safe, the things contained in there would not bow to me or you. It's more than likely that they would turn on us as soon as we set them free.

Terra: The Pit?

Naz'roth: you call it " Lair of The Keeper"

Naur: It's a prison, for Creature's too important to be killed but far too dangerous to be left alive. its gaurded by an Angel known as " The Warden" he's been gaurding it for longer than i've been alive. many Fallen Angels are imprisoned there, as well as Daemons, Demi-Gods and things that dont even bare mentioning.

Naz'roth: your legends of its snatching the souls of those who enter is true, the best way to stop things escaping is to have it's soul bound. not even mental entities can escape its clutches.

Feal-Thas: what about The Warden?

Naur: he's as much a prisoner as they are, except he's not trapped in a Khyber shard. he's more than a little insane.

Naz'roth: wouldnt you be? trapped in the dark for centuries with nothing more than the very people you hate to keep you company? that would drive most creature's insane.
rampant

02-16-07, 05:49 PM		Satnak - What about the gate room? If we could open up the portal again we can get some real reinforcements. I've seen Hyrd's pappy at the P.T.A. meetings he could swallow any of these little buggers whole! No seriously his eyes are bigger than most of these glorified geckos.

Terra - I'll vouch for that.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-16-07, 05:57 PM		Naz'roth: Sounds like a good idea, so Satnak i'll put you in charge of that operation, Take anyone you wish who isnt already tied up in a current mission. if we could open up a second point of attack then it would spread the dragons attention.
rampant

02-16-07, 05:58 PM		Satank - Liam, Allen Get to work you lazy bums!
rampant

02-16-07, 06:30 PM		Tirmek - Look Sarah I know this is a bad time, but

Sarah - But what?

Tirmek - I have reason to believe that the dragon mark of death is killing you somehow.
Crystalforged

02-16-07, 06:35 PM		Kanatash: (pokes OOCrystalforged with a stick) WAKE UP! Big battle of epicness happening here!

OOCrystalforged: Mumble,mumble... Just five more minutes...
Kanatash: (beats OOCrystalforged over the head with the stick) WAKE UP **** ****IT!
Kaizer_Ryu

02-16-07, 07:52 PM		Miko: She's dead...she's really dead. But not in the same way...

Miko wanders the mountains as the preparations for the counterattack are being made. She ponders this turn of events with a mix of concern and potential relief.

Miko: Something has changed. Lisa was to die in Sarah's jaws, not the King of Red Dragons. Queen Elina never said anything about going mute, but that b*tch never told me anything, anyway...

-----

Sarah: ...

Tirmek: Are you all right?

Sarah: No.

Tirmek: I guess that's to be expected.

Sarah: But I'm not completely surprised. I've been having...dreams, lately. Dreams of death. Of someone telling me to kill.

Tirmek: The Mark?

Sarah: I think so. It wants, no, needs to be used. I think the consequences of my refusal to feed its need are what you were just told...

Tirmek: Where's Elina? She needs to hear this.

Sarah: She went to visit the place Momma...

Tirmek: NOW?!

Sarah: Mom decimated their forces in the area. Now is probably the only time she'll have to say goodbye...

-----

Lilly: We shouldn't linger. I know you want to say goodbye and everything, but you're no good to anyone dead...

That was not the reason she was here, though it would take too long to say in her stilted speech. Lisa was no longer here, that much she had acertained from seeing Terra return.

No, this was vengeance, pure and simple. The Dragons had gone too far this time. Tirmek had told her of their weakness and it suited her just fine. Right now, she desired nothing more than the pleasure of running her hands through pools of Draconic blood.

She stood in front of the decaying carcass of the slain Red Dragon King. Within moments, the creatures soul reassembled before her. It stared at her with a mix of triumph, disdain, and a twinge of fear.

Red Dragon King: So you show your face at last. Too bad about your Mother. She chose to fight, knowing it could only end in death.

Elina just stared at him, hating him, yet knowing she would have the last laugh.

Red Dragon King: I will never understand these mortals. We try to give them a relatively peaceful existance. The myriad threats against them would not hold half the power over them if the did not squabble amongst themselves. You hate us for what we have done, yet it is the mortals themselves who have forced our hand.

Elina just smiled and extended her hand towards the fallen Dragon.

Red Dragon King: A wise choice. The mortals cannot be trusted with their own wellbeing. We will rule with a heavy hand, but not a cruel one. We only wish for your obedience, not your destruction.

The moment the Dragon touched the Promisebreaker, he saw her mind.

Red Dragon King: NO!

But it was far too late. He felt his will drain away as she took possession of his essense. This was to be her revenge. Merely killing them would never satisfy her. They would pay a billionfold for all they had done.

As the fallen King of Red Dragons was bound to her, she grinned. Dragons were an embodiment of magic. The way of the Bladeweaver would be her greatest revenge. "Blade and Spell are one".

Lilly: Are you ok? More souls? You've been staring at nothing for a bit.

Elina: J-just a.........mmmmmmmmoment...

Elina was suddenly wreathed in flames. She danced about them as they flowed to her will. The visage of an Ancient Wyrm could be made out at times amid the roiling fire.

Lilly: Whoa...

The flames calmed as Elina once again stared at the face of the once mighty Red Dragon King. The Ancient Wyrm bowed before her, totally subservient to the young woman.

Red Dragon King: What is your bidding, mistress?

Elina took in this image, savoring it. This would be the fate of every last one of those scaled murderers.
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 07:57 PM		OOC: As a note, The Red Dragon King is dead.

All the Dragon Kings are Ascendent Councillors and hence can only be killed by other gods or Chosen (whom are demigods)

The Red Dragon King was killed by Lisa. Sadly, Jarlot sacrificed his life to merely kill the Gold Dragon Duke whom wasn't a King but nevertheless almost as powerful.

But otherwise, great and creepy post.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-16-07, 08:07 PM		Yeah, I know. She imprisoned his fragmented soul. That is what she was talking to the entire time. Left to its own devices, his soul would have remained destroyed. Elina is beyond merely wanting them dead. She wants to break not only their bodies, but their spirits, their souls, and all they have done or hope to do.
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 08:18 PM		OOC: Ooooooooooo!

*cuddles widdle Evil Elina*

You're so KYOTE!
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-16-07, 08:30 PM		Sarah: I think so. It wants, no, needs to be used. I think the consequences of my refusal to feed its need are what you were just told...
Bunny: What's wrong with that? :confused:
***********
The Ancient Wyrm bowed before her, totally subservient to the young woman.

Red Dragon King: What is your bidding, mistress?

Elina took in this image, savoring it. This would be the fate of every last one of those scaled murderers.
The Errandis of Caralot's Earth watches this through a special scrying sensor made of the stuff that lies between universes.

Errandis: Hmmmm, I'll have to save this one for later.

(OOC: Yeah, this will actually have an impact on my plotline.)
rampant

02-16-07, 08:49 PM		Tirmek - Then feed it with those whose wills power the accursed thing. Achika, the dragons, feed them to it. Feed it its own origen and it will consume itself faster than you can say Oroborous.

Sarah - That sounds like a plan.

Tirmek - Yes! Destroy those who threaten us and ours! RAAAAAWWWWRRRRRRRRRR

Sarah - HOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWLLLLLLLLL
------------------------------------------------------------

OOC: Yes it has hit the fan.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-16-07, 09:04 PM		OOC: Yes it has hit the fan.
Bunny: *Mr. Burns-style "Exxxxxxxcellent"* :devil:
Kaizer_Ryu

02-16-07, 09:17 PM		(OOC: Yeah, this will actually have an impact on my plotline.)
OOC: :confused: You mean you're actually gonna get to it?

OOcat: :fight!: When am I gonna get a little respect around here?!

OOC: :eek:
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 09:48 PM		Lilly: *bats Elina's tail*

Ivy: Shouldn't we tell Elina she's being evil?

Lilly: *bat*

Ivy: Errr brother?

Lilly: *bat bat bat bat*

Ivy: Oh boy.
rampant

02-16-07, 09:55 PM		Tirmek - I fail to see the problem.

Ivy - She's enslaving souls!

Tirmek - And this is worse than dominate monster how? Frankly I'm just glad she's blade weaving again.
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 09:58 PM		Ivy: You want to see how horrible this act is?

Tirmek: Try me.

Ivy: Very well, here's a variant of my Bardic abilities Charm Tirmek with a hair of Lilly for material components.

Tirmek: Listen, do....LILLY IS MY BEST FRIEND.

*somewhere in the universe, reality snaps*
rampant

02-16-07, 09:59 PM		Tirmek - Horrifying as that is Its still not as bad as dominate monster. I asked you to prove that what she was doing is worse than using dominate monster.
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 10:01 PM		Ivy: why would I approve of dominate monster? I consider slavery in all forms to be bad.

Lilly: *bat*

Ivy: What it boils down to is fundamentally altering anyone's consciousness is an act of evil and death is preferrable. I would know.

Tirmek: How?

Ivy: I dunno, being turned into the Champion of the Keeper and having my own brother kill me?
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-16-07, 10:12 PM		Ivy: What it boils down to is fundamentally altering anyone's consciousness is an act of evil and death is preferrable. I would know.
Bunny: And if that's not enough, you can ask me. People tend to be releaved that they're dead.

Tirmek: You don't strike me as the type to stick around.

Bunny: I have to make sure they're dead.
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 10:16 PM		Bunny: And if that's not enough, you can ask me. People tend to be releaved that they're dead.

Tirmek: You don't strike me as the type to stick around.

Bunny: I have to make sure they're dead.

*Rose attempts to tackle Bunny*

Rose: GIVE ME MY ZELLA BACK! GIMME!

Ivy: Err...please ignore my dad.
rampant

02-16-07, 10:18 PM		Tirmek - Ok fine you have your line in the sand, Elina has decided that the bastard deserves this. Frankly I'm inclined to agree. The one paladin that ever looked beyond my backwards hands is dead! I'm begining to re-evaluate a few of my own decisions. If I accept the title of knightmare prince, I could have the entire Nightmare faction at my beck and call. Legions upon legions of Naityan champions, Nazarune iniltrators, Zakh'ya troopers, Ack'chazar magi, Hag strike teams, Quori psychics whose mere prescence would drive these lizards mad with terror, And most importantly : The 13th moon Angels. The power of Vengeance, Madness, Creation, and Memory all at my disposal.
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 10:27 PM		Tirmek - Ok fine you have your line in the sand, Elina has decided that the bastard deserves this. Frankly I'm inclined to agree. The one paladin that ever looked beyond my backwards hands is dead! I'm begining to re-evaluate a few of my own decisions. If I accept the title of knightmare prince, I could have the entire Nightmare faction at my beck and call. Legions upon legions of Naityan champions, Nazarune iniltrators, Zakh'ya troopers, Ack'chazar magi, Hag strike teams, Quori psychics whose mere prescence would drive these lizards mad with terror, And most importantly : The 13th moon Angels. The power of Vengeance, Madness, Creation, and Memory all at my disposal.

Lilly: Tirmek, frankly if its any consolation, I only disliked you because you're a d***.

Ivy: Brother?

Lilly: Frankly, I love how everyone's decision here is based upon the idea that the best way to handle the dragons is pull out every stop against them.

Tirmek: You're a fool if you think otherwise.

Lilly: Why I hate Rakashasas, you the only one I ever treated differently, is because fundamentally its the same thinking of the nobility that drives you.

Tirmek: similiar thinking from a self righteous pala...

Lilly: How many people are dead because of this war? The people who resisted or the thousands caught in the crossfire?

Tirmek: The Dragons came HERE. Not the other way around.

Lilly: And you're about to start up a THIRD DEMON WAR! The very thing that destroys the future! That renders all of Khovaire into a wasteland like the Mourning!

Ivy: He's right that we can't let this go unavenged.

Lilly: I'm a paladin like Lisa. I'm also a wizard. I understand how much damage magical power can unleash. The Mourning was caused by the release of a Rajah before Jarlot stopped him. Retaliating with full force will destroy this world.

Ivy: brother...

Lilly: I JUST LOST MY MOTHER TOO YA'KNOW. How many other people are we going to cost theirs if we wage this war senselessly. If I fight, I'll fight with my own hands as a human.

Ivy: It won't work...

*Lilly walks off*
Kaizer_Ryu

02-16-07, 10:46 PM		EDIT: Dang, this is less ominous now. Charles posted practically the same thing through different people. Meh, it still works and is still plenty ominous.

IC:

Terra wandered about far from the others, trying to sort out her mixed feelings. Godhood did not bring omnipotence, only the illusion of such. She was severely limited in even this by her brethren and Khyber. On the surface all seemed cut and dry, but...

Terra: No...no, this is all wrong...! Why is it wrong?! It all fits. The Dragons will go to any lengths to control the mortal races. They have been scheming for millenia, guiding the development of the humanoid races to their own ends and towards the Prophecy in general. That in and of itself should be enough to warrent their destruction. So why does every fiber of my being cry out that we are gravely mistaken?!

Talk of opening The Lair of the Keeper. Releasing the Rajah on purpose. Tirmek even considering becoming the Knightmare Prince. Elina's obvious fixation on revenge. Sarah contemplating the use of her Mark. Were these just the options being considered in the face of overwhelming odds? Or something much more?

She stopped cold with the realization of what was really going on. She had to- no. Warning the others would alert Achika. That could potentially be worse than what was already in store. Then what could she do? The end game was fast approaching, and only those who knew the rules would make it out on top. Yet her hands were tied. If she said nothing, the likely result was death. If she said anything, the only result was death.

All life as they knew it was at the precipice. There would be no second chance, no room for error. And it all depended on that one most elusive of acts. The one where they needed Lisa's guidance the most.

Terra would need to learn exactly how light a touch a diety needed to use in a hurry. She remembered something Lisa had said to her what seemed like ages ago.

"If you do things right, people won't be sure you've done anything at all."

Terra: Lisa...guide my hand.
Paulon

02-16-07, 10:47 PM		Tirmek - If I accept the title of knightmare prince, I could have the entire Nightmare faction at my beck and call. Legions upon legions of Naityan champions, Nazarune iniltrators, Zakh'ya troopers, Ack'chazar magi, Hag strike teams, Quori psychics whose mere prescence would drive these lizards mad with terror, And most importantly : The 13th moon Angels. The power of Vengeance, Madness, Creation, and Memory all at my disposal.

OOPaulon: This force being the same one which were held off from locating Tirmek for years by a sign painted on the FF saying "He's not here!", and whose leadership was outsmarted by Lilly? I think I know where that idea came from.

13: :evillaugh
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 10:48 PM		OOC: I do have to say, there's something truly off going on when LILLY (he of the low wisdom) seems to be considering the consequences above everyone else.
Paulon

02-16-07, 10:51 PM		OOC: Because he's not got enough candlepower in his braincells to invent the self-justifications the others have come up with for going nuts? Kinda like how mindless critters are immune to things that are designed to fool a thinking being?
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 10:56 PM		OOC: I was figuring that with all the critical failures on his wisdom, he had to achieve a natural 20 sometime.

:-)

But yours works too.

And don't worry Kaizer_Ryu, I'm sure that Lilly's support of the issue only means people will be even more certain its the right choice.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-16-07, 11:04 PM		OOC: In one of the great ironies, the very position that allows Terra to see the whole picture denies her the ability to inform anyone else. Lilly heading this off at the pass may be her only chance.

On a completely random note, has it occured to anyone that the file size for this entire thread's text has just exceeded the size for the old thread? And in literally half the time?

'1001+ Things that the worst party in Eberron is forbidden from doing...' file size = 4.62 MB after 11 months

'The New Adventures of the Forgotten Freedom' file size = 4.66 MB after 5 1/2 months

Word.
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 11:07 PM		OOC: We'll start the Further Adventures of the Forgotten Freedom at 200 pages.
rampant

02-16-07, 11:10 PM		OOC: That's because they rock.

13 - Like he's gonna say anything else with Teiza holding a shotgun to his head:D

Bunny - *holding a feather to Teiza's nose* tickle tickle...Sneeze damn you!!

OORampant - :gah:
rampant

02-16-07, 11:11 PM		OOC: We'll start the Further Adventures of the Forgotten Freedom at 200 pages.

Is this before or after we finally finish updating the wiki?
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 11:12 PM		OOC: We'll ever finish updating the wiki?
Kaizer_Ryu

02-16-07, 11:23 PM		OOC: I can barely keep up with my own characters! Cut me some slack!

And here's a list of posters that we haven't seen in a while that I wish would come back:

Chrys

LugWrench

Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

Phantomcrossing

Gladuis_Lucix

rawarner3701

Albert

Not necessarily in that order, of course. We need more than half a dozen people posting.

Whoa, deja vu.

Isn't that why we started the new thread in the first place?
Charles Phipps

02-16-07, 11:29 PM		Hey it worked!

;-)
ratslinky

02-16-07, 11:38 PM		Gaz: (i.h.h) Esabar where is your soul now is when I need your guidance most

Esabar: I have seen... past, the... and... future, remember not to become what you set out to destroy... the world... become the... future I... you... Elina rules... an iron fist. And remember the secret to defeating this threat lies in all of you but only the dead can guide the god.

Gaz: (i.h.h) Huh Esabar is that you *looks around and for the briefest moment sees her then she flashes out and the only words that remain are "Yes". Gaz was left to ponder what she had said*
rampant

02-16-07, 11:39 PM		Teiza - *munchcrunchgrowl*

Corre - Do you have to be so aggressive about it? You're scaring my class mates.

Reshalin - Hide me!

Half-ogre - If scary girl get to eat with hands why do i have to use silverware?
luna18moon

02-16-07, 11:42 PM		Slaypaw: I'd have to agree with Ivy. Slavery in any form except willingly is utter evil. I was forced to slaughter hundreds of people and my own family because of that mentality. It hurts to think that dear Elina would stoop so low.
rampant

02-16-07, 11:53 PM		Satnak is marking off an area roughly equal that of a medium city.

Satnak - Ok this is going to be a much bigger model. The pylons will be under ground at the marked points. I'll provide the linkages this time, just get the pylons built.
rampant

02-17-07, 01:15 AM		Kithle - I warned you, they can be smarter than you think.

Achika - what do you care?

Kithle - Just distracting you

Achika - Huh?

Warforged - Arrrrr Achika-san yarrr harrr be on farrrr

Achika - You bastard kithle

Kithle - Say it
Charles Phipps

02-17-07, 02:25 AM		Lilly: Dad, I'm sorry. I failed.

Rose: You didn't fail son.

Lilly: I should have been there. I should have saved her.

Rose: If you had then you would have been killed too and the droids would now be in the hands of the Empire.

Lilly: What?

Rose: Errr nevermind.

Lilly: Elina hates me now too for the fact I'm cautioning against Revenge.

Rose: This is why being a paladin sucks.

Lilly: It's not that I like the Empire, I hate it but I can't get involved...

Rose: Lilly...

Lilly: Wow, Star Wars references are easy to make in a story like this.

Rose: Might as well embrace them. Here let me get you something.

*hands Lilly a little metal hilt tht shoots out a blade of flame*

Rose: Your father's Dragonslayer. Tis the weapon of a Dragon Knight.

Lilly: Why would you have a paladin's sword?

Rose: I didn't say I owned it ORIGINALLY. I won it in a card game. It is an elegant weapon of a more civilized age.

Lilly: How is a weapon that sets a man on fire more elegant?

Rose: I said more civilized, not nicer.

Lilly: Uh huh.

Rose: You must learn the ways of the Weave if you are to come with me to Toril.

Lilly: Toril? I'm not going to Toril, I've got to get home. I'm in for it as it is.

Rose: That's your Uncle talking.

Lilly: I don't have an uncle.

Rose: Errr yeah ya doo. That's Hops. Hops is sort of my drunken red neck twin brother.

Hops: Heyuk.

Lilly: Oh God.

Hops: Lilly, you clean that there Landspeeder? Dem Droids?

Lilly: Why Toril?

Rose: Only there is the shameless twinkery great enough that the races of man can defeat Epic Level Dragons without being utterly story breaking.

Lilly: I thought that was Dragonlance.

Rose: No, Krynns....going through some rough times right now what with the entire world being rewritten every other novel. Best to avoid it for now.

Raistlin: ULTIMATE POWER WILL BE MINNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Rose: Most of us outgrew liking you when we realized you really were pathetic in your emo phase.

Raistlin: :cry:
rampant

02-17-07, 03:46 AM		OORampant - Bah don't listen to the doubters, show those losers what made you the greatest wizard of your age!

OOKaizer - What have I told you about encouraging them?

OORampant - I know I know, but it beats having original villians who might actually beat the goodguys.

OOkaizer - True I mean a villian with 2 brain cells to rub together would have figured it out by now.

OORampant - I mean seriously its same trick we use to avoid giving them raises.

OOs : Free BOOZE!

Zombie Jarlot - Someone called me?
Charles Phipps

02-17-07, 03:59 AM		Ghost Jarlot: Use the Weave Lilly.

Lilly: Jarlot?

Ghost Jarlot: Yeah, thank Dol Dorn for Lawyers.

Jonnny Orkrun: If the sword does not fit, you MUST aquit!

Ghost Doog: HEY LILLY!

Lilly: Who the hell are you?

Ghost Doog: :cries:
Crystalforged

02-17-07, 04:23 AM		Kanatash is sitting on a piece of wreckaged from the still burning hulk of the Forgotten Freedom.

Kanatash: *sigh* (glances upward) Ah, so you're finally awake.

OOCrystalforged: Yep, I guess I just haven't had much to say in a while. How are you?

Kanatash: Physically? I'm perfectly fine. Otherwise though...

OOCrystalforged: Yeah, I know. How is everyone?

Kanatash: Well Caralot made it to safety without issue and Kitten is still with her grandparents.

OOCrystalforged: Things like this almost make you glad OOCat hasn't managed to get around to her storyline in a while.

Kanatash: Heh, course my labratory and all my test subjects were destroyed in the crash, couldn't be helped.

OOCrystalforged: So what are you still doing here then?

Kanatash: I'm just... Kinda tired...

OOCrystalforged: Something wrong?

Kanatash: Its just, well, the Forgotten Freedom is gone. As I've said before the ship was the greatest nexus of madness on this plane so as you might expect I drew a fair bit of power simply from it existing. Overall it isn't that significant, but it does mean the scope of my abilities is rather more limited.

OOCrystalforged: So thats why you haven't joined the fray yet, err...

Kanatash: You mean beside the fact you couldn't get around to typing me into the battles? Yeah well its part of it. The rest of it is that there just isn't a hell of a lot I can do against these bastards on my own. I could call in my friends in high places but with all the hullabalou about tapping into dark forces for this battle I don't think they'll be well recieved.

OOCrystalforged: True nuf. Besides I'm not entirely sure how I would insert you into the story at this point anyways. So what do we do now.

Kanatash: Meh, watch, wait. Maybe you should try to give me a dramatic appearance at some point. You know, just to annoy the Dramadar a little more. Course they're probably in shock right now anyways but hey.

OOCrystalforged: Alright, sounds like a plan.
Charles Phipps

02-17-07, 04:44 AM		Lilly: Don't worry Kanatash, I've come for your advice.

Kanatash: What?

Lilly: I figure no one else is better qualfiied on evil magic, so I want you to help me PREVENT the apocalypse by giving me advice on how this kind of thinking goes!

Kanatash: :twitch:

Lilly: And I also need an Animal Companion.

*picks up Kitten*

Lilly: Surely Kitten, with LOVE we'll be able to win the hearts of the others over to FIND A PEACEFUL SOLUTION!


Kitten: YAY! Love is a better way than War!

Lilly: Hey, Kithle, we want to solve this conflict without fighting!

Kithle: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHA!

Kanatash: Well assuming you want to solve it without bloodshed, I recommend psychic powers to melt the brain....
rampant

02-17-07, 04:53 AM		Kithle - I never fight boy, i annoy.
------------------------------------------

Silver Dragon Queen - Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh

Crystals - so he was like uh-huh, and she was like nuh-uh
-----------------------------------------------------------------

Lily - What did we just say about not tapping dark forces?!

Kanatash - Dammit! The one bright point was that they should have been wiped out as well!
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-17-07, 07:33 AM		……Naityan champions, Nazarune iniltrators, Zakh'ya troopers, Ack'chazar magi……
13: ……Ak'bar fish-head generals, Meka'leka mage wanabes, Echa'sketcha draftsmen……
Esabar: I have seen... past, the... and... future, remember not to become what you set out to destroy... the world... become the... future I... you... Elina rules... an iron fist. And remember the secret to defeating this threat lies in all of you but only the dead can guide the god.
Bunny: Must…gasp out…last words…in…Shatner…style…crytic………
Lilly: Why Toril?

Rose: Only there is the shameless twinkery great enough that the races of man can defeat Epic Level Dragons without being utterly story breaking.
Elminster: :evillaugh: Soon shall the barriers between this world and the Forgotten Realms be broken, and then…………EPIC NPCs WHO MAKE PCs SEEM OBSOLITE!!
Charles Phipps

02-17-07, 07:40 AM		Elminster: :evillaugh: Soon shall the barriers between this world and the Forgotten Realms be broken, and then…………EPIC NPCs WHO MAKE PCs SEEM OBSOLITE!!

Lilly: Dude, look at this crew. Their Twinkery shames even the Seven Sisters.

Elminster: *looks at Satnak*

Lilly: Yeah.

Elminster: *Runs away crying*
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-17-07, 08:09 AM		Achika looks around at the psychic warforged ninja with laser swords and heat vision who are also riding dinosaurs, a look of distain for cliché coolness on her face.

Achika: :evillaugh Follish mortals. Before stands the progenitor dragon Khyber! I am a god! Not even your overdone attempt to inspire awe can defeat me.

Warforged who seems to be acting as leader: That is true. Only plucky heroes can defeat a force as overpowered as yourself. We shall withdraw, letting our god handle you.

*Ninja Vanish!*

Achika: How do they do that riding dinosaurs? :confused:

Kithle: Jurrasic Park Velociraptors.

Achika: Ah, the ultimate innacurate specimens. HAHAHAHAHA!!! But they think there is any god on this world that can defeat me? There are only two who walk it's surface.

Kithle: Three.

Achika: What? There are only myself and Terra.

Kithle: You forgot a god that was being created over all the years that the FF flew the skies of this world.

Gradually clanging thumps come into hearing, as if some giant metal creature is walking toward where Achika now stands. Almost instinctively she glances toward the formerly mist-covered Mournland.

Into view strides a huge metallic being, larger than Colossal size, covered in extranious fins and bulk in some places. It's head seems to be covered by a helmet, hiding it's mouth and letting only the eyes peek out.

Achika looks back at Kithle once, then begins to change. Her form grows into a multi-headed dragon, but not just one with chromatic heads but also with metallic, crystal, and all the other heads of true dragons. In addition her body is covered in spiky bits, with even her individual scales being spiky. She flies to meet her challenger.

Achika: Oh ho ho, so this is the Becoming God? AHAHAHAHAHA!! You expect to be able to defeat me? I AM KHYBER! I have the power of more mortals behind me then you shall ever see in your now short—GLOCGH!

The Becoming God has somehow accelerated the distance between them, punching it's fist in and through Khyber's body.

Becoming God: Bite my shiny metal A**!

Khyber: How…? Your number of worshippers is too small for you to be…UH…this powerful.

Becoming God: That's true, but I have also tapped into another power source. One just as, if not more, fanatical than any religion: a fanbase!

Khyber: What? What are you talking about—:eek: A giant robot with the ability to fight giant freaky monsters.

Becoming God: That's right: I'M A MECHA, B:censored:! I am the first god ever to trust mortals enough to let them guide my actions from inside my very being! Though I may one day regret that decision, I shall always know, and I hope my worshippers know, that I am not the cause of their misdeeds. NOW FEEL THE POWER OF MY "CALLING-OUT-THE-NAME-AS-I-PERFORM-IT" ATTACK!!!!!!!!!!!

Khyber: *ker-pwned*
Charles Phipps

02-17-07, 08:24 AM		OOCharles: Ketler, stop worshipping him!
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-17-07, 08:36 AM		Naz'roth: *staring into the scrying pool at the becoming god* well THATS a first.

Naur: Who knew the warforged where that inventive?

Naz'roth: wouldnt that mean that the warforged creation forges actually create souls? especially if they can create divine energy enough to power a god.

Naur: Perhaps they just take the blank souls that remain on Dolurrh?

Naz'roth: perhaps-

Satnak: less musing more working!
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-17-07, 10:29 AM		Naur: Perhaps they just take the blank souls that remain on Dolurrh?
Becoming God: And there is another thing…………MOTHER!

Khyber: No……it cannot…be!

Becoming God: YES! I have been endowed with the spirit that has been compared to Batman, Chuck Norris, Samurai Jack, and Jack Sparrow! I'M JARLOT!

Inevitable Wearing a British Army Uniform: No no, stop this at once, this is far too silly! This post is striken from the record! Non-canon!

Becoming God: Oh, good. I'd hate to become that much cheese in my first acts as a god.

The I.W.B.A.U. can be seen carting off Random-Acts-of-Sillyness-OOcat.

OOC: ;) Just having some fun with ya. But it's an interesting idea.
rampant

02-17-07, 12:29 PM		Tinktinktink

Red D King - What are you doing? :bored:

Tirmek - I thought you said you were a chosen?

Elminster - My head....

Red D King - excuse me but-

Tirmek - *brandishing elminster like a club* Shut up this mage is loaded and I'm not afraid to use it!
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-17-07, 12:48 PM		OOC: rampant wins a :looloo:, because I have no idea what just happened.
rampant

02-17-07, 12:54 PM		OOC: Well elminster is a chosen of mystra, that scene was tirmek taking the whole it takes the sacrifice of a chosen to take down one of the dragon kings thing a little too literally.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-17-07, 01:19 PM		Elina: *with difficulty* Ssssstop m-m-m-m-messing with m-m-m-my soul-sl-l-l-lave.

Tirmek: You're no fun. :P

Elina: He is merely the first of many. I will lay low each and every one of those overgrown lizards.

Tirmek: *slightly surprised* ...you said that coherently...

Elina: *coldly* In this case, I am very focused. I cannot hesitate. They took my Momma away and they are trying to take everyone else. I will not rest till I bathe in the blood of the ones responsible.

This wouldn't have freaked him out as much if she hadn't said it with a completely serious look on her face. Had she been upset, or starting to tear up, or her voice had wavered, he might have written it off as the grief talking. But this...

Tirmek: Elina...?

Elina: :mad: I don't care if you, or Lilly, or Sarah, or anyone else don't understand. Let them live all you want, it won't save them from me.

A portal of darkness opened up behind her as she stepped back. The portal closed again as soon as she was through, leaving Tirmek with his thoughts.

Tirmek: I understand your pain, but is it really worth all this? What's gotten into y- ...oh, crap! SARAH!

Sarah: *shadow warp* What?! What's wrong?!

Tirmek: I know why Elina's acting so strange. Her mind is completely unbalanced! The shock of losing Lisa has her locked in to 'revenge' mode. The rest of her mind is still weak, fragmented. The only part of her mind with any ability to function properly is telling her that genocide is the only way!

Sarah: You mean...? :eek:

Tirmek: Yes, she's become completely unreasonable. All she sees, all she can see, is Lisa's death at the hands of the Dragons. This may even be how Miko's world came in to being.

Sarah: What do we do?

Tirmek: As much as it pains me...we need Spoony Jr. for this.

OOC: More later.
rampant

02-17-07, 01:27 PM		Tirmek - ...OH FRACK! I'VE BEEN PLAYED! The bloody lizards said the mark is killing you, I bet they want you to use it for some reason either because using it will hurt you just as much or more than not, or because it furthers their oher aims somehow. They got me riled up and thinking about the Nightmare faction, Aomas must have had words with them about how to tick me off. Elina might not be quite playing into their claws but we need more information!
Crystalforged

02-17-07, 03:08 PM		Kanatash: Heh, if you want to stop the fighting I know how to do it. Its easy really.

*The scene backs up to reveal Kanatash standing before a huge armory containing various versions of the DM Breaker.*

Kanatash: Thats right, I have DM Breakers and I am not afraid to hand them out to the Dramadar. THAT will bring an end to this conflict. :evillaugh

OOCrystalforged: :bored: No, just no.

Kanatash: :bigeyes: Ah, come on.

OOCrystalforged: Do you comprehend the reprecussions of giving DM Breakers to the Dramadar would be? The effect that would have on this entire thread? Especially you with your blatant dramaqueenism?

Kanatash: I would make them good for only a few shots. Nothing could go wrong.

OOCrystalforged: Famous last words if I ever heard any.

Kanatash: Awwwwww. Fine...
rampant

02-17-07, 03:51 PM		Momo - *sniffle* momma

Nina - :weep:

Scias - How...how...howwwwwlllllllllllll

Deis - :allalone:

Teiza - I miss her too. *Sniff*

Corre - Come here guys *big group hug* We'll get through this.
Charles Phipps

02-17-07, 03:54 PM		Lilly: Obviously, what we need is the healing power of RELIGION!

Tirmek: Huh?

Lilly: Well, religion is the best way to bring peace isn't it?

Tirmek: Uhhh...

Lilly: Dude, my wisdom may be low but even I understand that there's something a trifle off about that statement. WHICH IS WHY I SHALL USE A RELIGION THAT ALL OF US CAN AGREE ON!

Tirmek: Oh no.

Lilly: BANJO THE HAND PUPPET!

Tirmek: Lilly...

Lilly: With the Virgin Kitten as his first Saint!
rampant

02-17-07, 04:41 PM		Tirmek - Must resist urge to kill spoony.

Lily - Banjo!

Tirmek - I...I....I....

Lily - All hail the lord of puppets!

Tirmek - Sarah you do it!

Sarah - No way!

Lily - Banjo the Mighty! Smite the infidel!

A tiny storm cloud appears and zaps Tirmek.

Tirmek - Ouch. Cut that out you nimrod! I need your help.
-------------------------------------------------------------------

Balor - Bring me hot cocoa minions!
Kaizer_Ryu

02-17-07, 05:15 PM		Satnak: Are you ok?

Terra: *drying her eyes* All things considered, yeah...

Satnak: You don't look ok.

Terra: ...I just had the "When is Momma coming back?" talk with my little ones...

Satnak: Oh. .........oh... :(

Terra: *sniff* :( You should have seen the looks on their faces when it finally got through to them. I never want to see them like that ever again...

Satnak: I can easily imagine how they feel right now. Thankfully, they didn't go through the exact same thing we did, but Ketty and I know what it's like to lose someone so dear so young. At least they still have you, right?

Terra: Yeah...

-----

Nina: Ne-chan?

Sarah: Hm? Yes, sweetie?

Nina: Oni-chan stole this a little while ago. We thought you might be able to use it. We can only read parts of it.

She hands Sarah a book marked in Draconic runes. A quick flip through reveals what appears to be a notebook, with scribbles, diagrams, and whatnot intermixed with the regular text.

Sarah: How did he get this?

Nina: He doesn't know. He just did. Pulled it right out of the air.

Sarah: It's a start. I can only imagine this is some kind of Plot Device. Scias does seem to be sensitive to them. Where is he, anyway?

Nina: He and Momo are trying to fix things everyone salvaged after the crash. The other Artificers are preoccupied fixing the gate to One Eye or with defending ourselves, so they wanted to do something to help. Deis is playing with the Demon Chocobos, trying to keep her mind occupied after everything that's happening...

Sarah: *kneels* And what about you?

Nina: .......... :weep: I don't know what to do...

Sarah: I do. You can help me.

Nina: :( But...I can't do anything...

Sarah: On the contrary, you can do something very important. You can keep me company.

Nina: That's not helping...

Sarah: *brushes Nina's hair* Nina, I may not show it as much as you do, but I'm very scared right now. Everyone is. I don't want to be alone right now, and having you with me will help me out tremendously. Can you do that for me?

Nina: :weep: :D Hai! *hug* Thank you, Ne-chan...
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-17-07, 05:25 PM		Tirmek - Must resist urge to kill spoony.
Bunny: This one's on me. *revs chainsaw*

13: Hold everything!

Bunny: Oh, what now!?

13: I have a better way to control Spoony Jr.

Bunny: Please, just let me kill him.

13: But if I do that then Elina will remain in B*tch Mode.

Bunny: *sigh* :mad: Oh, very well, what's your way.

13: Theaten to release tapes of what he and his brother did on their adventures!

Lilly:……………………

Tirmek: What's that going to do?

OOCharles: Yeah, everyone can rent those. They're called "Full Metal Alchemist".

13: That's all fake.

OOCharles: How?

13: Listen, animé people talk by simply flapping their mouths. You can't read their lips. All you have to do is insert words that match up with the movements.

OOC: Believe me, I've seen ones where they just completely riffed and ignored the original script. You couldn't tell.

Sarah: Well then what about subtitles?

13: And how many of you actually know Japanese? Show of hands.

*cricket chirp*

13: So any idiot can insert random subtitles. But I have the original tapes with the correct translations and—

Lilly: :eek: THAT WON'T BE NECESSARY! I'll be good.

OOC: And yes, I can carry through with this threat.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-17-07, 05:40 PM		OORei: *wildly flailing his arms* I know Japanese!

OOKaizer: Fluently. You're only in your second year.

OORei: :tantrum: 忌々しい! それは公平でない!

OOC: Brought to you by Babel Fish, the usually correct universal translator.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-17-07, 05:56 PM		it was dark, and there was no one else in the large central courtyard in Naur's stronghold. Feal-Thas stood in its direct center, he couldnt sleep. every time he closed his eye's all he saw was the demiplance collapsing inwards... and everyone of his siblings pershing.

It was strange how it didnt fill him with rage, he just felt... empty. Ever since he'd been created he'd never really been alone, he was always one amungst many. The quiet was also strange, he was so used to hearing the sounds of training and industry in the background. this absolute silence was disturbing.

He was the last one left... the last evidence of his fathers great work. the last of his kind.

Feal-Thas: ( Ihh) perhaps this is how its supposed to end? is this what Father warned us of?
Charles Phipps

02-17-07, 06:00 PM		(actual translation of Full Metal Alchemist)

Edward Elric: Gee wilikers brother, what are we going to do now that Old Man Smithers has taken over the country?!

Alphonso Elric: Eat their hearts and crap out their souls.

Edward Elric: But I'm a vegetarian!

***

Lilly: The Faith of Banjo compels me to seek out the goddess of another religion.

Terra: *sniffles and holds Lisa's broadsword*

Lilly: Hey Terra. I come to you for advice about finding a solution that doesn't involve releasing the Great Old Ones.

Terra: *thinks* [/i]Oh crap, what do I tell him that won't directly influence him to the wrong decision[/i]

Lilly: I figure the Faith of Banjo, God of Hand Puppets suggests we should find other ways to beat the Dragons than relying on the strength of other powers. That's really just trading one master for another.

Terra: *thinks* Oh Thank Lisa! He's figured it out on his own!

Lilly: You don't have anything to say on my plan?

Terra: No.

Lilly: Oh crap, then it must be wrong!

Terra: Wait...

Lilly: You're usually there to help me! If you're not even dignifying this with a response then I must be really off. Oh Great BANJO! HOW I HAVE FAILED YOU!

Terra: Gah!

Lilly: I must immediately work on freeing the Old Ones!

*bounces off*

Terra: :twitch:
Charles Phipps

02-17-07, 06:36 PM		Skull Island
Secret Base of the Forgotten Freedom
And Popular Tourist Trap owned by Mister Roarke, Jarlot's Uncle

Ketler: Well the, Forgotten Freedom III has now been constructed.

Satnak: You had to dismantle the Forgotten Freedom II to do it.

Ketler: Well yes, but the new ship should run twice as good as the old one!

Satnak: You ended up abandoning the project 3/4ths through and gluing a Spelljammer's wreckage on! Plus parts of the Old One!

Ketler: Yes, very much like how the original came to be.

Satnak: Stupid is the anchor!

Ketler: Your marvelling at my handiwork is impressive.

Momo: Ooooooooooooo!

Ketler: See, she likes it.

Satnak: You bribed her with Rooseveldt.

Rooseveldt: I point out Ketler actually didn't DO any of the work except designing this monstrouscity. But, you know, who cares about the plushie's hard work.

Hyrd: Rrrrr?

Rooseveldt: KEEP THAT GUY AWAY FROM ME!

Ketler: Do you WANT to stay on this island forever?

Serene: It's fun making friends with some of the other castaways. There's Jack, Sawyer, Kate, Mister Locke.....

Satnak: I admit the Dinosaurs are fun and so is the giant monkey that lives here.

Donkey Kong: APE! I am a full blooded Giant Mountain Ape! Please kindly get that right *places monacle over his eye*

Ketler: In any case, we have to determine the most important duty we've ever had. WHO WILL BE THE NEW CAPTAIN.

Satnak: Isn't Rose the Captain?

Ketler: I think he's sort of out of the running now.

*Rose sits by the beach*

Rose: Wastin away again in Margeritaville....searching for my lost shaker of salt....SOME PEOPLE CLAIM THAT THERES A WOMMANNNN TO BLAmMMMmmmeeeeee

Satnak: Hmmmmm. Maybe you're right.

Ketler: Thankfully, I've contacted the King's Citadel for the proper forms to determine who will be our next Captain.

Jennifer Hunter: Hello, I'm Jennifer Hunter and here to make things needlessly bureaucratic.

Satnak: Oiye.

Jennifer Hunter: First of all, do we have any minorities on the ship? If so, they automatically get to be Captain.

Ketler: Which ones?

Jennifer Hunter: All of them.
rampant

02-17-07, 06:45 PM		Dorvos - Yay! I'm captain!

Ketler - What?

Dorvos - Well I'm the only male Crystal Gaurdian in the whole of existance.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-17-07, 07:04 PM		Dorvos - ……I'm the only male Crystal Gaurdian in the whole of existance.
Bunny: *revs chainsaw* That can be rectified. :devil:

Silver: Very much so. :D

Bunny:………………………:yuck: Kid, you just got a reprieve.
**********
Reman: Well, it turns out there are criteria to meet—

OOcat: :confused: Hey, I thought I had you perish with Jarlot so you could serve as his attourney in the afterlife.

Reman: I don't think anyone noticed.

Anyway, there is one very important quality that the captain of the FF must have—

Terra: The ability to hold enough liquor to kill Khyber.

Reman: Okay, two—

Ketler: A complete knowledge of all popular culture so that he can successfully parody it.

Reman: Well then, three—

Kithle: Utter disreguard for his own safety, sanity, and image.

Reman: Can I just say what I was going to say? I can summon an injuntion devil if need be.

All: *animé sweatdrop*

Reman: The captain of the Forgotten Freedom must be a being so totally in tune with the chaos inherant in all of existance that he/she/e/it can make it sit up and sing……………………the "I Love You" song.
urial angel of death

02-17-07, 08:10 PM		During the FF's destruction in Nalfien's lab.

Nalfien: *holding a huge pile of books and magical trickets* So apprentice are you ready with the teleportation cirlce?

Blast rocks the ship.

Kerrith: Master you're forgetting two things. One the neo-kythons and two the portal to my home-plane.

Nalfien: What about 'em.

Kerrith: If you magical force-shields are destroyed the neo-kythons will escape and a tempral rift will form where the portal used to be.

more explosions

Nalfien: And...

Kerrith: Don't you care about the destruction our creations could bring? They are potientially the most powerful creatures in existance, and without our control they will breed like wild-fire. Millions would die and we have no idea what could come through a rif in space itself. Don't you have any empathy?

Nalfien: Nope. Always lookin' out for number one.

Kerrith: Arrogent bastard.

The room fills with light and both master and apprentice are gone.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

02-17-07, 08:16 PM		Anyway, there is one very important quality that the captain of the FF must have—

...

Reman: The captain of the Forgotten Freedom must be a being so totally in tune with the chaos inherant in all of existance that he/she/e/it can make it sit up and sing……………………the "I Love You" song.

Chanse Random "Well, being named after the very manafestation of Chayos, and indeed having 20 class levels becoming a litteral Incarnation of chayos and an actual pirate and sucessfull mutanear it wouls apaer we have a fait acompli, no? If any one actaly wants me I'll be in the bar,shooting other potental candidates."
rampant

02-17-07, 08:26 PM		Jennifer hunter - Sorry you're disqualified under the not chance rule.

Norbaz - I don't frigging believe this.

Andrea - the only one left who qualifies ... sort of, is Micheal.

Satnak - .... SNAP OUT OF IT ROSE!
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-17-07, 08:30 PM		Chanse Random "……If any one actaly wants me I'll be in the bar,shooting other potental candidates."
13: Except the only door to the bar we had was destroyed with the FFI and Erk hasn't opened another yet.

Pirate Crew: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
Charles Phipps

02-17-07, 08:43 PM		After hours of negotiation

Captain Satnak: I want this floor spic and span!

Captain Serene: Yes, clean it so that I can eat off it?

Captain Satnak: Ewwww.

Captain Serene: Well I don't mean literally.

Rose: *sigh*

Captain Ketler: And a fine top of the morning to you Ensign!

Rose: *continues scrubbing* I can't believe everyone is a Captain but me.

Captain Ketler: Well, you just need to fill Article 9 to get it. Satnak and Serene get it because they're lesbians, I get it because I'm disabled.

Rose: WHAT!?

Captain Ketler: I suffer from Sexlexia.

Rose: YOU'RE A COMPLETE NERD THAT OTHER NERDS LAUGH AT!

Captain Tirmek: Rakashasas are a powerful lobby.

Captain Marish: Shifters suffered persecution a long time ago. Thus we're entitled to economic incentives.

Captain Ketler: So, seriously, become a Captain.

Rose: Thankfully, I have some self respect.

Captain Doog II: pfffft. Like you Half-Elves haven't been keeping the orc down all the time.

Rose: THAT IS ANTI-AEREMITE! And how the hell is he speaking normal?

Captain Ketler: Being Captain went to his head. Man, now that I'm a Captain, all this racism business is really annoying me. Can't you people do anything but complain?

Rose: You got your position by shamelessly abusing Assertive Faction!

Captain Ketler: Blah blah blah. This is because you people killed Tira Mirron. Mel Gibson was right about you.

Rose: That's it. I'm leaving.

Captain Doog II: I don't trust anyone who won't eat pork.

Captain Ketler: And don't forget to scrub the toilets either jackass!

Captain John: At last, no longer am I just a piece of the furniture but a fully accepted Crew member.

Captain Ketler: Actually, turns out warforged and other constructs aren't eligible.

*takes away the Dire Keel's captain's hat*

John: You still love me though, right Kitten?

Captain Kitten: I'm sorry, I don't talk to furniture.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-17-07, 08:46 PM		OOC: I'm sorry, I have to give Charles another :looloo:. Anyway, I think he's right: why the F*** does the FF need a captain? All it really comes down to is an idiot that we can make fun of and that the crew ignores, and that's everybody except wives.
DungeonJman

02-17-07, 08:49 PM		*suddenly starts ranting and raving and banging against the sphere*

Evil DungeonJ: What the...? He know's it's pointless, unless.... oh crud.

*stops for a second and begins twitching before his eyes turn into draconic eyeslits and he begins to attempt to claw at the sphere*

Evil DungeonJ: Double crud! Well, it doesn't matter if Eberron is trying to reinforce him as its chosen and posess him. He's still trapped in the sphere.

*the Yin and Yang Yo-Yos fall onto the sphere, letting OODungeonJ out before OOQuincey comes to reclaim them*


OOQuigley: It's funny, it felt like something knocked them out of my pockets. Oh well.

Evil DungeonJ: Oh come on! Well, this can't be good. Not even for Bunny.

Bunny: What do you mean.

Evil DungeonJ: Well, it depends: do you like dead people with their souls intact or not?

*permanently dead tarrarasque with its soul shattered into a million pieces then lands next to Evil DungeonJ*

Bunny: Wow, he couldn't have been out for more than, what? A minute? And this is just swordsage abilities?
Charles Phipps

02-17-07, 08:51 PM		OOC: I'm sorry, I have to give Charles another :looloo:. Anyway, I think he's right: why the F*** does the FF need a captain? All it really comes down to is an idiot that we can make fun of and that the crew ignores, and that's everybody except wives.

Well someone has to take the blame when things go wrong....
DungeonJman

02-17-07, 09:00 PM		Evil DungeonJ: Of course, I don't think Eberron has the knowledge of how to use E.B.N.E. powers. I'm surprised that 20th level swordsages don't use the 22 times death version of that combo. Well, time to get back to work.

*uses fell flight and flies over to the posessed OODungeonJ before going into his head*

Evil DungeonJ: Eberron, i'm calling you out!

*Eberron appears, but is bigger than Evil DungeonJ in the way that a human is bigger than an ant, and blows him into a cage which locks itself, trapping him next to the encaged Law and Good, just by breathing out*

Evil DungeonJ: Well, that worked worse than i thought. How'd you guys get in here?

Law and Good: We locked ourselves in by choice.

Evil DungeonJ: WHAT?!?!

Both: Yes, when Eberron said that it needed to do what needed to be done, we both agreed that it would be worse for the greater good and order if we would have the capability to interfere, so we locked ourselves up.

Evil DungeonJ: *begins banging his head against the cage*
Kaizer_Ryu

02-17-07, 09:04 PM		OOQuigley: Did you have to keep the costume?

King Torg: Yes. Now be silent!
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-17-07, 09:49 PM		Evil DungeonJ: Well, it depends: do you like dead people with their souls intact or not?
Bunny: That question is so stupid I think I'll leave it for you to figure out, or someone else to realize it and blurt out the answer.
ratslinky

02-17-07, 09:58 PM		Gaz: Hey Lilly I think your idea about banjo might work

Lilly: *in the middle of summoning the great old ones* Really

Gaz: Yeah I really think so

Lilly: But Terra said she didn't have anything to say

Gaz: So? That just might mean she thinks it can't be improved and she's being all cryptic like prophets and gods alway are

Lilly: Are you sure

Gaz: Absolutely

Lilly: *In an unsure voice* All right I'll think about it

Gaz: (i.h.h) Well it will either work and I can claim some of the credit or more likely it will fail and I can watch Lilly's butt get kicked and then claim that I was only trying to improve his self esteem
Kaizer_Ryu

02-17-07, 10:21 PM		Terra: "Do what needs to be done?" And you know what that is?

Eberron: Of course.

Terra: You of all beings should know that nothing grants omnipotence, not even godhood. You know no more of what must be done than I or Khyber.

Eberron: You are being blocked, little one.

Terra: :bored: Whoopty doo. At least I still have enough sense to know when I'm walking right into the enemy trap.

Eberron: Khyber is not the only force at work here.

Terra: :rolleyes: Thank you EVER so much for that statement of the blindingly obvious... Perhaps next you'll tell me that the Dragons aren't-

Eberron: SHHHH!!!!
DungeonJman

02-17-07, 10:40 PM		Sheesh it's bad enough that all of you keep messing with the natural order of things, but could you at least GET OUT OF MY HEAD ?

Terra, Eberron, Evil, Law, and Good: NOOOOO!!!
Paulon

02-17-07, 10:47 PM		*OOPaulon hands DungeonJman a really high powered vacuumcleaner*

"Feel free to try it out for pest control. But I wouldn't do it near Kithle, just in case it works too well and he gets peckish."
rampant

02-17-07, 11:42 PM		Tirmek -Elina!

Elina - You aren't going to stop me.

Tirmek - Oh please :rolleyes: Even If that was the point that's beyond my ability. You set yourself to something and you do it. I just want you to stop going off without the rest of us. Our abilities are more effective when used in concert. (i.h.h. just get her to stop running off without us, we can worry about the rest later)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Feal-thas - Now?!

Ketty - Serene won't let me go dragon hunting, the last time I tried picking up a screwdriver ended badly, and Tirmek is busy. So get in there and lose the shirt!
DungeonJman

02-17-07, 11:59 PM		Nah, i'm good with removal.

I don't care for what purpose you came. I finally have a chance for the first time in days to regain my free will, and i want you out NOW!

*Eberron is forced into another part of his mind*

Eberron: Well that wasn't so bad....

*sign on the room reads: Compression Chamber (aka, the place where things get broken down into their base alignments and the energy is stored for future reference) and the seal in the room activates*

Eberron: Uh-oh.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-18-07, 12:47 AM		Eberron: Good thing this is only my avatar.

-----

Elina: S-s-sarah...

Sarah: Yeah?

Elina: I n-n-n- (i.h.h.: Damnit, voice, work!) *sigh* *begins scribbling furiously*

Sarah: "Dragons...not...lie...about...death"? Is this about the Mark slowly killing me? Did the one you imprisoned tell you this?

Elina: *nods to both*

Tirmek: What do we do about it?

Elina just shakes her head. The Red Dragon King knew of it's purpose and the consequences of denying it, but the Acendant Counsel was unclear about its creation and means of removal. Khyber's method was beyond even them.

Elina: As much joy as it will bring me to do so, killing them is not going to get rid of it.

Sarah: Elina...please. That's enough. You're scaring me.

Tirmek: So you want revenge. Fine. But trying for it without considering the consequences or difficulties involved will do nothing but bring more pain. Would you please just help us with the task at hand?

Elina: F-f-f-f-f-fine...

Tirmek: (i.h.h.) Ok, good. Just keep her off that line of thinking. Give the rest of her a chance to recover more.
rampant

02-18-07, 01:22 AM		Tirmek - First step I want to see my work in action.

Elina - Huh?

Tirmek - Lets see how much you've forgotten!

Tirmek uses a quick burst power to close the distance, and smashes the ground where Elina had been standing with his azure warhammer. His other hand swings around manifesting a massize nodachi to counter the whip of shadow lightning, from Elina hovering above.
ratslinky

02-18-07, 02:28 AM		Gaz: *Walks in to see Elina training with Tirmek* Hi Elina good to see you training again

Elina: H-hi Gaz

Gaz: I see Tirmek has you training again by the way it's nice that you can talk again. Sarah popcorn?

Sarah: Huh? :confused:

Gaz: Yeah this is one of the best fights I've seen between them
rampant

02-19-07, 02:55 AM		Tirmek has been holding back using minimal powers and witholding his essentia from his melds to make them hard to percieve.

Elina - *scatters a dozen icy shuriken at the boy* (i.h.h. what is he waiting for?) *a spear of lighting blasts down forcing Tirmek to turn his jump into a dodge* (i.h.h. he keeps trying to get close, but he has no flight melds that I can see, not that that means anything with the way he's holding them back) *A net forged of corrosive acid and mindblade shapnel descendsupon Tirmek quickly chewing throughhis armor*

Tirmek sees his chance dodging yet another lighting spear he leaps.

Elina - (i.h.h. missed again!:mad: oh crap he's lighter now he's gonna get alot closer this time!)

Elina quickly realizes its too late to dodge upwards, instead the canny suferot simply surrenders to gravity slipping below tirmek and just below his unusually faint warhammer.

Tirmek - (i.h.h. oh she's good, looks like I'm gonna have to this now instead of waiting for a solid hit)

Tirmek pushes as much essentia as he can into his warhammer, as its azure form shimmers to full life it seems different. Instead of the straight lines and sharpedges along the head of the hammer it has a more rounded off appearance, and it hums oh so slightly.

Elina - What the Bloody Mol!?

The humming stops and a silent shockwave bursts forth slamming Elina into the ground as Gaz and Sarah dive for cover behind a rock.

Tirmek - You should have seen the look on your face.:D
Charles Phipps

02-19-07, 03:27 AM		Captain Rose's Rules for the Wolf-Girls on the Ship

1. It is wrong for Sarah to bite the leg of any Red Shirt she meets....

2. Especially OFF.

3. Sarah and Elina are to have buckets under them during chili night to prevent excessive drooling.

4. No, Sarah, poodle style is not a "sexy French look."

5. Nor is it a sexy Aundair look.

6. Whenever visiting a city, Terra is to keep her two children leashed for the safety of the citizenry.

7. Especially when around mail men, undead, speeding cars, and Evil Overlords.

8. It is not good for Sarah's self esteem to refer to Elina as the "Show Dog" of the pair.

9. It is wrong to throw fizbees over the side of the deck so the pair must fight instinct.

10. Please, someone get Sarah to stop chasing her own tail.

11. Tirmek's back can't take much more of it.

12. It is wrong to refer to Kibble as "Growing Girl's favorite Cereal."

13. Purina Wolfgirl chowTM is for dinner only.

14. Old Yellar is not to be shown to the Newborn kids in order to traumatize them forever.

15. This means YOU Kanatash.

16. Kanatash is forbidden from conducting Palov experiments with the girls and food.

17. Sarah is still drooling every time the ship's bell rings.

18. Kanatash is forbidden from attempting to train Elina and Sarah as fighting dogs....

19. Satnak has that well taken care of.

20. Kanatash will not frighten the newborns by saying their mother is trying to raise them for being made into a coat.

21. Kanatash is forbidden from encouraging Terra to have children in order to turn them into a coat.

22. Lilly is forbidden to take Elina and Sarah out to flush out game.

23. Someone needs to teach the girls PC because they keep barking at black orcs.

24. ....I know Terra does too but she's from a different time.

25. It is wrong to refer to Sarah as the "mutt"

26. Sarah isn't dumb. Just....less gifted in certain areas than Elina...

27. Specifically all of them.

28. Unauthorized Ear scratching is to be considered sexual harrassment.

29. The same for tummy rubs.

30. I won't even say about sniffing private areas.

31. That goes for you and Tirmek Sarah!

32. Tail wagging is to be considered flirtation.

33. Sarah is not to betray the ship to Kanatash's evil schemes in exchange for a diamond collar.

34. LET ALONE A RHINESTONE ONE.

35. Jacob Hunter is forbidden from having Sarah sniff things to seek clues.

36. Its causing her to be exposed to things she shouldn't be.

37. Elina should stop making Sarah look so bad by comparison.

38. Elina is not to be compared to Lassie or White Fang.

39. Sarah is not to be compared to Scooby Dooh or Underdog....

40. ....or Scrappy.

41. Elina is to stop being such a little overachiever.

42. Sarah is to stop being such an underachiever.

43. To encourage this, Kanatash is forbidden from showing Sarah that her aptitude test score is identical to Lilly's.

44.....and Elinas was a perfect score.

45. Elina is not Lisa Simpson.

46. Sarah is not Bart.

47. Sarah is to stop chasing Marish.

48. So is Terra.

49. Sarah is not to chase Kitten instead.

50. Let us all be thankful for Elina.

51. ....and what's her name.
rampant

02-19-07, 03:41 AM		In chalk

52. :evillaugh:

53. Nina is forbidden from painting people different colors.

54. Its my schtik dammit, get your own you little ankle biter!

55. Ow My ankles!
----------------------------------------

Elina - What was that!?

Tirmek - A little something nasty i cooked up. Its a modified form of my Incarnate weapon. By channeling psychic energy into it I can increase the power of the shockwave generated. It works on the same principal as the more advanced melds my aunt uses, manipulation of psionic power or raw psionic energy. You know her beam scatter gauntlets?

Sarah - Most definetly.

Tirmek - This is a melee equivalent.
Charles Phipps

02-19-07, 03:42 AM		56. Elina and Sarah are forbidden from sleeping in puppy piles in order to be provactive.

57. Ketler is forbidden from selling the pictures online.

58. Sarah and Elina must wear their ID or Lycanthrope Catcher Hunter (he gets shuffled around a lot) will catch them and put them in the pound.

59. That would not make Sarah and Elina Pound Puppies.

Hehehe.
rampant

02-19-07, 03:46 AM		OOC: Wow all the way to 51 before the numbers started cramping.

Jarlot's Ghost - Gaaaaaaah! The one reason I agreed to this whole dead gig was the condition that wouldn't have to listen to people complain about the Gorram numbers!

OORampant - Who letyou in here?

Jarlot's Ghost - DIE!

Kithle - Say it!
Crystalforged

02-19-07, 03:56 AM		After hours of negotiation

Captain Satnak: I want this floor spic and span!

Captain Serene: Yes, clean it so that I can eat off it?

Captain Satnak: Ewwww.

Captain Serene: Well I don't mean literally.

Rose: *sigh*

Captain Ketler: And a fine top of the morning to you Ensign!

Rose: *continues scrubbing* I can't believe everyone is a Captain but me.

Captain Ketler: Well, you just need to fill Article 9 to get it. Satnak and Serene get it because they're lesbians, I get it because I'm disabled.

Rose: WHAT!?

Captain Ketler: I suffer from Sexlexia.

Rose: YOU'RE A COMPLETE NERD THAT OTHER NERDS LAUGH AT!

Captain Tirmek: Rakashasas are a powerful lobby.

Captain Marish: Shifters suffered persecution a long time ago. Thus we're entitled to economic incentives.

Captain Ketler: So, seriously, become a Captain.

Rose: Thankfully, I have some self respect.

Captain Doog II: pfffft. Like you Half-Elves haven't been keeping the orc down all the time.

Rose: THAT IS ANTI-AEREMITE! And how the hell is he speaking normal?

Captain Ketler: Being Captain went to his head. Man, now that I'm a Captain, all this racism business is really annoying me. Can't you people do anything but complain?

Rose: You got your position by shamelessly abusing Assertive Faction!

Captain Ketler: Blah blah blah. This is because you people killed Tira Mirron. Mel Gibson was right about you.

Rose: That's it. I'm leaving.

Captain Doog II: I don't trust anyone who won't eat pork.

Captain Ketler: And don't forget to scrub the toilets either jackass!

Captain John: At last, no longer am I just a piece of the furniture but a fully accepted Crew member.

Captain Ketler: Actually, turns out warforged and other constructs aren't eligible.

*takes away the Dire Keel's captain's hat*

John: You still love me though, right Kitten?

Captain Kitten: I'm sorry, I don't talk to furniture.
Kanatash nonchalantly floats into the room, knocks the captain's hat of Kitten, tucks her under his arm, and floats out of the room.

Kanatash: (sticking his head back into the room) Oh, by the way the lot of you are morons. If you wanted someone really in tune with chaos to run this ship I would probably be the one to nominate. Not that I would accept, don't any of you remember the level of :censored: we put our captains through? I persoanlly make a hobby of destroying them mind, body, and spirit. I mean I'm sure all of you can think of at least one instance where you personally went out of your way to make our captain's life a living hell.

The rest of the "captains" glance around not meeting anyone's eye.

Kanatash: Oh, by the way, if your going to pick a real captain I would suggest Jarlot Sr., the admiral certainly would seem to fill the role.

John: But I though you hated him, he always foiled your attempts to mess with him.

Kanatash: True, but never let it be said I don't apreciate a challenge. Nice to see you miraculously survived despite being attatched to the destroyed ship John. (ducks out)
Charles Phipps

02-19-07, 03:59 AM		Admiral Jarlot: Hell no, I'm not accepting a demotion!

Kanatash: There's no fleet.

Admiral Jarlot: I suggest reanimating my boy's corpse!

Kanatash: But....

Admiral Jarlot: What you have a problem with an UNDEAD Pirate leading this crew?
rampant

02-19-07, 04:47 AM		Chalky - i like that plan, it'll be the best he's ever smelled.

Jarlot's Ghost - Are you implying that I smelled bad?:mad:

Chalky - Of course not sir.

Jarlot's Ghost - Good!

Chalky - I'm stating it rather emphatically.:D
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-19-07, 10:12 AM		Kanatash: …………don't any of you remember the level of :censored: we put our captains through? I persoanlly make a hobby of destroying them mind, body, and spirit. ………
13: Hey, here's an idea: why don't you become captain and then you can do that to yourself.

Kanatash: I'm already that insane.

13: I meant going the opposite direction.

Kanatash: You mean…………:eek: Eeeeeevil.

13: :devil:
Admiral Jarlot: I suggest reanimating my boy's corpse!
Bunny: There will be no reanimating! :mad: It's bad enough that you people are so hard to kill!
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-19-07, 10:17 AM		Bunny: Hey, what happened to the epic stuff? :confused: Suddenly no one is killing or getting killed.

Becoming God: I'll say: I'm a big pile of cool without my monster-of-the-week.

13: Maybe they finally realized that drama is boring?

OOcat: Nah, I'm the only one here who thinks that. :allalone:

13: So where's Silver?

Bunny: You heard what Ketty said. :bored:

13: Oh, then I guess Feal-thas will have his dragon army back up to full strength soon. :D

Bunny: Why're you smiling?

13: Because half-super psychic elves/half-super warrior dragons are going to be so cute :schemes: as babies.
rampant

02-19-07, 11:43 AM		A glimpse into the future

Feal-thas - SHE'S EATING MY HAND!

Ketty - (Not paying attencion) That's nice dear. Don't forget to get her to bed on time.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-19-07, 12:05 PM		Day before Operation "Slippers"
the courtyards are a buzz of activity as the angels begin the preparations to create the portals. all aobut the sounds of-

Naz'roth: wait. Hold it! we're not calling it that.

OOKale: what?

Naz'roth: we're not calling it operation Slippers.

OOKale: but i like the name.

Naz'roth: whose millitary campaign is this?

OOKale: but I wrote it!

Naz'roth: your merely a scribe. im just projecting my idea's into your pathetic mortal skull.

OOKale: But..*sigh* fine. what do You want to call it then?

Naz'roth: Operation "Travick Landing"

OOKale: but that references to Sharn. if there was a spy then he'd know exactly where your attacking.

Naz'roth: AH! So there is a spy-

OOKale: Thats not the point

Naz'roth: You Admit it!

OOKale: *sigh* i really dont know why i bother trying to do this.

Naz'roth: because if you dont i'll find a way into your world and make you suffer?

OOKale: ok ok. jeez. give me a break.

Naz'roth: anyway, its reverse psychology.

OOKale: how so?

Naz'roth: obviously they are going to belive that I would be smart enough to give it a name that isnt to do with the operation itself. so they're going to assume that we're not Actually going to attack sharn.

OOKale: but what if they know that your trying to trick them and you are actually going to attack sharn? these are dragons you know.

Naz'roth: silence mortal. now get back to writing the scene.

OOKale: *muttering* I never get any respect.

Day before Operation "Travick Landing"

The Couryards bustle with the heptic activity of preparing for the battle to come, spellcasters are preparing the spell to open the portals, warriors test their weapons, officers go over their commands and the generals generally plan things.

Naz'roth: Okay, does everyone understand their orders.

Everyone: Yes.

Naz'roth: do you want me to go over it one more time?

Everyone: NO!!

Naz'roth: alright. make the final preparations, get some sleep and we'll all meet at O'eight hundred hours.

Sarah: what?

Naur: *sigh* he means eight am.

Sarah: Oh.

Naz'roth walks off. everyone sighs with relief.

Sithis: thank the six. i thought he was going to go over it all again for a moment...

Terra: sheesh. he's really into this isnt he.

Naur: he's nervous, its his way of showing his nerves. there's a lot at stake. this is just his way of coping with the stress, he's not as bad as i remember. he used to check everything forty odd times and even then we'd still have to use a sleep spell to make him rest. Well, see you all at lunch, i've got to go over a few things with Eilal.

OOC: If any of you have got anything to do before the first attack starts, nows the time to post it. i'll post the first attack tomorrow.
rampant

02-19-07, 01:20 PM		Tirmek - Ugh!

Sarah - You won didn't you?

Tirmek - About as much as I ever can against you two.

Sarah - What is that supposed to mean?

Tirmek - You guys recover so quick its hard to call anything i can do a decisive win. I can immobilize, drain, and screw with your heads all day, but nothing that will put you two down more than an hour. Its frustrating.

Sarah - True but its also part of the reason we work so well together. Who else could take all the crazy stuff you pull, like that impact hammer, or that creepy little construct in the net gag, and don't get me started on that Call Fish power.
Charles Phipps

02-19-07, 02:09 PM		60. Sarah is forbidden from drinking from the fountain and other water utilities that are not meant for drinking.

61. Sarah will be sent back to Obedience school if she doesn't learn to stop piddling on crew she doesn't like.

62. Crew are authorized to use corporal punishment against Sarah for her pranks (yes, a ROLLED UP NEWSPAPER!)

63. Elina is to be given a soft and fluffy red pillow to lie on.

64. Sarah gets newspaper.

65. Elina is to be shampooed daily.

66. Sarah can be just hosed off.

67. No Lilly, it's not an accomplishment to have Sarah carry your duck kills in her mouth when you go hunting together.

68. It is wrong to try to flirt with Elina by wearing a shirt that says "Alpha Male" on it.

69. Remember, Elina and Sarah are to recieve ALL of their shots whether they resist with lethal force or not.

70. Sarah needs to stop digging up the hull to try to bury things! Instinct or not, it's a SHIP.

71. Elina's breed is not canine awesomest.

72. Sarah's breed is not canine tomgirliest.

73. Dyeing Sarah and calling her Clifford is not high comedy Ketler.

74. Especially when she bites you.

75. Sarah is not to bite the hands off anyone feeding her...

76. Even if the chili is not to her liking....

77. ...even for flavor!

78. Kanatash! Why the hell did you tell Sarah that Goofy is the way he is because of his experiences during Vietnam!?

79. And that Pluto is his retarded brother?

80. Odie is not brain damaged either!

81. Brotherhood of the Wolf is not racist against the Wolf.

82. Nor is American Werewolf in London

83. American Werewolf in Paris might be considered bad comedy.

84. Stop drooling over Inuyasha Elina!

85. Ditto you and Koga Sarah!

86. Kanatash, why are you telling Elina and Sarah the Howling movies were used to justify hate crimes against werewolves?

87. It's not appropriate to cry when the Worgs are killed during The Two Towers

88. Sarah's closest intellectual equivalent in TV canines is not Santa's Little Helper.

89. Eine the Data Dog is about Elina's intelligence though.

90. Sarah is to stop eating Kanatash's slippers.

91. Even if they're made of meat.

92. Sarah is to stop being addicted to the white stuff.

Sarah: I'm A POLICE WOLF! I'm SUPPOSED to sniff for that!
DungeonJman

02-19-07, 02:19 PM		Angel of Evil: So why the heck was I left out of this?

OODungeonJ: You come from a different universe and despite what you say, you are still technically the head honcho of the department of all mortal evils and evil is what they are trying to prevent here, i think.

Angel of Evil: What do you mean you think?

OODungeonJ: This crew tends to cross between the lines of good and evil rather frequently, as is the motives of the dragons. Good thing Eberron's avatar got sent to the... oh crud.

*inside OODungeonJ's head*

All three inclinations: OUT!!!!

Lawful Good Eberron: But justice must be done!

Neutral Good Eberron: But good must be done!

Chaotic Good Eberron: But freedom must be preserved!

Lawful Neutral Eberron: But the law must be upheld!

Neutral Eberron: But the balance must be kept!

Chaotic Neutral Eberron: Clorp!

Lawful Evil Eberron: But order must be enforced!

Neutral Evil Eberron: But our own interests come first!

Chaotic Evil Eberron: But everything needs to be destroyed!

*outside his head*

*smacks his head* Oh why did i put that avatar in the compression chamber?
urial angel of death

02-19-07, 05:42 PM		Volrath is seated with P/Y/R, his own children, and Terra's youngest batch.

P/Y/R: Come on honey, you're a priest. Surely you have something to help cheer the kids up.

Volrath: Well there's one I could try but it will take some alteration to fit. Everyone hold hands. Except for you Kenny. You sit inside the circle.

Kenny: Mrf!

Volrath: I promise you won't die.

Kenny: Ffmppffmf fmmmmmmffmpm fmpmfpmmmfmp mmpmmmmmfpmp mmmfmp fmpmfpmpp ppmmppmmmfmpmfmpffmffpppmpmmpppfffmm fmpppfppf!

Volrath: That was an accident. Now get in the circle.

Kenny: *with some hesitation enters the circle of hands*

Volrath: Oh great and all mighty Elder Gods; heed our call! We ask for you assistance in avenging a dear friend and mother.

children: Ia!

Volrath: Though she was a heathen; We ask Grandfather Azathoth for the power, Grandmother Shub-Niggurath for the numbers, Uncle Yog-Sothoth for the opertunity, and Father Nyarlathotep for the conviction to carry this revenge to its end.

children: Ia!

Volrath: Give us these things so that we might bring down the unrighteous ones whom stole these girls' innocence away far before its time. The innocence that was ment to gradually decay like a fruit rotting from enthropy or a reality falling due to mankinds vice; was instead brutally ripped away as a crystal shatters by the hammer.

children: Ia!

Volrath: Take is sacrifice in return that we might find you favor.

Kenny: Mrf!

Volrath: Sorry Kenny.

A bright light envelopes Kenny and he is gone.
rampant

02-19-07, 07:22 PM		93. Stop hiding explosives in the chew toys.

94. Ditto the puppy treats.

95. I don't care how much they improve the flavor.
Charles Phipps

02-19-07, 07:25 PM		96. There will not be a rabies panic everytime that the kids brush their teeth.

97. Except for Sarah.

98. She might get it from Tirmek.

99. Momo is attracted by shiny things. Avoid showing him any.

100. Kanatash will stop threatening to put the kids to sleep before pretending that he meant to bed all along.

101. Kanatash you are not a licensed veterinarian.

102. BECAUSE VIVISECTION AND FLESHCRAFT ARE NOT SCIENCES.

103. It is wrong to take Sarah on Lettermen for Stupid Pet Tricks.

104. Sarah will not cuss in wolfish. We know what she means.

105. Stop playing "Who let the Dogs out" everytime the kids play. It only gets them rowdy.
rampant

02-19-07, 07:27 PM		OORampant - Actually Momo is a girl, Scias is the theif-aaaaaahgk!

Jarlot's ghost (strangling OOrampant homer simpson stlye) - YOU SHUT THE HELL UP!
Charles Phipps

02-19-07, 07:30 PM		Well its hard to tell.

Babies that are furry are strange that way.

*puts Momo in a pink outfit*

*has his leg bitten*
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

02-19-07, 07:38 PM		93. Stop hiding explosives in the chew toys.

94. Ditto the puppy treats.

95. I don't care how much they improve the flavor.

106 With reguards to these Ash is not alowed to be a food taster.

107 Becase he drinks alchemists fire for 'the cool minty flavor'

108 Also becase that being the case there are questions over him being able to taste food.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-19-07, 07:47 PM		OOC: Wow, I just realized that I was the one who put werewolf into the mix, and I now can't believe how much it's been accepted, to the point of having a list related to it. Shows you what happens to small ideas on this thread. Maybe the Becoming God will get regular guest appearances.
Charles Phipps

02-19-07, 07:48 PM		OOC: Thanks. Lilly helped (note, I don't say me) by using his magic to make them explicitely dog-girls :-)

As for the Becoming God, he's the focus of my next major post.

I wonder how Kaizer is going to react to a list about his wolf girls.

Especially how Sarah is depicted. Hehe.
DungeonJman

02-19-07, 07:55 PM		Just curious, don't the Orbs of Dragonkind exist in Eberron?

*in his head*

Lawful Good Eberron: If so, then we must seek them out in a well planned order.

Lawful Evil Eberron: And then use them to take over the world! AHAHAHA

LGE: Shut up!

LEE: Make me!

LGE: Fine!

*massive fight that somehow involves all 9 Eberron's ensues inside of my head*

OODungeonJ: Wow, i really need an asprin or something.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-19-07, 08:43 PM		Just curious, don't the Orbs of Dragonkind exist in Eberron?
OOcat: And solve this problem easily? Have you no sense for the making of tough situations so that characters can go through hardships? Yeah, I'm all for it.
Charles Phipps

02-19-07, 08:47 PM		OOcat: And solve this problem easily? Have you no sense for the making of tough situations so that characters can go through hardships? Yeah, I'm all for it.

They exist in Eberron, it's just the fact that Khovaire has a population of 10,000 Dragons currently serving as our Scaly Overlords as opposed to a few hundred that are menacing various towns and the like.

It's going to be a lengthy time to displace them by attrition unless one can negotiate them to leave willingly.

(I won't tell you how many Dragons live on Argonessan total)
Kaizer_Ryu

02-19-07, 09:28 PM		:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Poor Sarah...

Sarah: What?! You're supposed to defend me against these slanderous lies!

Quiet you. It's funny.

*CHOMP*

MY HAND!
Charles Phipps

02-19-07, 09:40 PM		Sarah: Let me see our character sheets....WHAT THE HELL!?

Elina: What?

Sarah: WHY THE HELL DOES IT HAVE YOUR CHARISMA AS 25!?

Elina: I'm as cute as Jaela. What?

Sarah: I'm a THIRTEEN!

Elina: Well your other stats are usually up to par...

*Ninjas behind Sarah*

Sarah: Hold on, failed a spot check.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-19-07, 09:45 PM		They exist in Eberron, it's just the fact that Khovaire has a population of 10,000 Dragons currently serving as our Scaly Overlords as opposed to a few hundred that are menacing various towns and the like.

It's going to be a lengthy time to displace them by attrition unless one can negotiate them to leave willingly.
Bunny: Pffft. :rolleyes: Give me a large rock.

Silver: NO! BAD BUNNY! No mass extinctions!
Kaizer_Ryu

02-19-07, 10:27 PM		OOKaizer: Look at the top half of the sheet.

Elina: I don't see what's so bad. My Strength is 19.

Sarah: WHEEEE!!!

Elina: What? Lemme see that... :OMG! A 30! WTF?!?! And a Constitution of 28?!

Sarah: Ha-ha! Where's your 20 Consitiution now, huh?! :P

Elina: This explains so much. ...oh, good. You found the Ninja.

Sarah: *gnaw* *chew* What Ninja? *chomp*

Ninja: :weep: My leg...

Sarah: (i.h.h.) Why do my chew toys alway make noise?
Paulon

02-19-07, 10:31 PM		:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Poor Sarah...

Sarah: What?! You're supposed to defend me against these slanderous lies!

Quiet you. It's funny.

*CHOMP*

MY HAND!

OOPaulon: These kids are natural lycanthropes... so with them chewing on anyone who bugs them does this mean the crew of the new FF is going to get a lot hairier come the next full moon? Or even some of the EBNEs?

*backs away from Kaizer_Ryu and wonders where he left the wolfsbane and silverware, just in case*
rampant

02-19-07, 10:36 PM		OOC: Thats what the seals are for...
...
...
...
That and a large stash of monk's hood.

Tirmek - Alot of monk's hood.

Lily - Isn't that stuff poisonous?

Tirmek - I've built up an immunity.

Bunny - Dammit!

13 - Dammit!
Charles Phipps

02-19-07, 11:00 PM		OOKaizer: Look at the top half of the sheet.

Elina: I don't see what's so bad. My Strength is 19.

Sarah: WHEEEE!!!

Elina: What? Lemme see that... :OMG! A 30! WTF?!?! And a Constitution of 28?!

Sarah: Ha-ha! Where's your 20 Consitiution now, huh?! :P

Elina: This explains so much. ...oh, good. You found the Ninja.

Sarah: *gnaw* *chew* What Ninja? *chomp*

Ninja: :weep: My leg...

Sarah: (i.h.h.) Why do my chew toys alway make noise?

Take a :rofl:
Kaizer_Ryu

02-19-07, 11:01 PM		OOC: Yay! New award! :D

IC:

OOKaizer: Technically, only Scias and Sarah can spread it, and only when fully transformed.

Sarah: Awwwww....

OOKaizer: Besides, I'm already what amounts to a Dragon Lycanthrope, being Breath of Fire III Ryu.

Sarah: Wait...I thought you were Link?

OOKaizer: Rose keeps screwing with me, so I need a fallback personality.

Sarah: But are you SURE you want to be a Dragon Lycanthrope?

OOKaizer: Yeah...why?

Elina: ELINA SMASH!!!!!!!

OOKaizer: GAH!
DungeonJman

02-19-07, 11:11 PM		OOC: Yay! New award! :D

IC:

OOKaizer: Technically, only Scias and Sarah can spread it, and only when fully transformed.

Sarah: Awwwww....

OOKaizer: Besides, I'm already what amounts to a Dragon Lycanthrope, being Breath of Fire III Ryu.

Sarah: Wait...I thought you were Link?

OOKaizer: Rose keeps screwing with me, so I need a fallback personality.

Sarah: But are you SURE you want to be a Dragon Lycanthrope?

OOKaizer: Yeah...why?

Elina: ELINA SMASH!!!!!!!

OOKaizer: GAH!

Once again, an example of why i never bug my chars.

OOKaizer: What do you mean? The only char of yours is a wizard whose existance only is jarred when you need a char for a plot!

OODungeonJ: Well i can't just let him die to the half-biscuits because he's not particularly interesting.

Nobby: Well that's only because you planned my backstory enough for one good joke!

OODungeonJ: I can change my mind about the half-biscuits at any time you know.

Nobby: Shutting up.

OOdungeonJ: Anyway.

*takes a claritin and the various alignment eberrons are cleared away. Only claritin d can clear your sinuses! yadda yadda, (insert blatant ad here)*
Paulon

02-19-07, 11:14 PM		Sarah: But are you SURE you want to be a Dragon Lycanthrope?

OOKaizer: Yeah...why?

Elina: ELINA SMASH!!!!!!!

OOKaizer: GAH!

*Written in chalk*

109. Elina is not to turn herself green. That's my job.
Charles Phipps

02-20-07, 12:32 AM		101 Rules for Lilly and Ivy

1. Lilly is forbidden from grinding up Redshirts into Philosopher's Stone.

2. ....just because you regret not doing it earlier is no excuse.

3. It is wrong to slit Harry Potter's throat in order to get his.

4. Because in America, it's a SORCERER'S stone.

5. ...yes I realize that's stupid.

6. Lilly is forbidden from trying to rescue Elina from Ganon.

7. You will not usurp your father's role!

8. Ivy is forbidden from screaming out "HUGGHESSSSSSS! I'MMM SORRRRRRRY!" in his sleep

9. Lilly is forbidden from revelaing it was he who really shot him.

10. It is forbidden for Lilly to take pictures of Lieutenant Rita Hawkeye in the Shower.

11. The King's Citadel has scrying and licensed pictures for that.

12. Lilly is forbidden from attaching machine guns to his warforged grafts.

13. Because who needs a LEG chain gun?

14. The answer is not you.

15. Lilly is forbidden from twinking out on Gun-Fu.

16. D20 Modern is NOT Cross combatible with Eberron!

17. Ivy is forbidden from trying to sneak into Tirmek's bed.

18. Even in Full Platemail.

19. I know the platemail is comforting after your ordeal!

20. Lilly is forbidden from trying to turn Tirmek into gold.

21. And especially so for spending him when it happens!

22. Ivy is forbidden from trying to get his brother to clone Tirmek

23. Ivy is forbidden from trying to make Kitten into his familiar involuntarily.

24. It is wrong for Ivy to make suggestions to Kitten that she could look more like Tirmek if she wanted.

25. Dargunn is not the setting for World of Warcraft Lilly.

26. Nor can you get to Level 50 by just wandering around and killing stuff.

27. Ivy will not lead a Warforged Revolution.

28. Lilly is forbidden from binding the soul of a female crew member to make Ivy a mate.

29. He wouldn't be interested in that gendered soul anyway...

30. It is wrong to feed Sarah meat stuffed with the "Special Ingrediant" of Sarah snacks.

31. Even if you want to jam with her.

32. Tirmek and Lilly are not to be referred to as "Calvin and Hobbes"

33. Or "Tycho and Gabe."

34. Or "Ken and Ryu."

35. Yes, Lilly, you'd be Ken.

36. No Lilly, you can't gun kata.

37. No Lilly, Christian Bale won't play you when you grow up.

38. Lilly, there's no guns in Eberron.

39. No, you can't have a semi-automatic crossbow.

40. THE POINT IS THAT YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO DO A MATRIX LOBBY SCENE!

41. Ivy, it's wrong to repaint Kanatash's study pink.

42. I'm aware that it's dreary.

43. No, people won't think you're gay because of your pink armor.

44. They think you're that because you're homosexual.

45. No, I won't settle the Guns vs. Swords debate.

46. Both are equally badass.

47. You're too young for a trenchcoat Lilly.

48. Ivy, stop writing Tirmek/Ivy slash.

49. REALLY.

50. No, Sarah won't fix your warforged grafts.

51. She's not Winry!

52. Elina is not Rose.

53. Cyreans are not Ishbalans.

54. Despite the Big Cyrean Avenger with a Scar on his head.
rampant

02-20-07, 12:38 AM		55. Seriously Ivy you have a boyfriend.

56. Stop mooning over Tirmek, you're giving Hyrd a complex.

Hyrd - (wearing a pair of black kitty ears) Hugs?
cypher_zero

02-20-07, 01:00 AM		OOC: Creepy dude....
.
Crystalforged

02-20-07, 01:42 AM		26. Nor can you get to Level 50 by just wandering around and killing stuff.
OOCrystalforged: :confused: Then how the **** DO you get to level 50?
41. Ivy, it's wrong to repaint Kanatash's study pink.

42. I'm aware that it's dreary.
Kanatash: Actually I requested the paint job. I believe in having a pleasent, welcoming atmosphere when preforming brain surgery with a hacksaw and toenail clipper on a conscious victe- er, patient.

OOCrystalforged: Aaaaaaand THATS probably why they said it was wrong for him to paint your study pink.
23. Ivy is forbidden from trying to make Kitten into his familiar involuntarily.
OOCrystalforged: By the way Silver, I've noticed you haven't gotten back to Kittens plotline in quite awhile and she's been showing up on the ship more and more so are we just going to assume she's come back by this point, presumable reasonably well adjusted by this point?
ratslinky

02-20-07, 02:03 AM		OORatslinky: Guys check this thread out it's awesome http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=336206. And by the way anyone who knows how do I make the link so it reads say for this one I wanted Funny trailer adaptions thanks in advance
rampant

02-20-07, 02:44 AM		Lady - They say you can talk normal now.

Dorvos - Yeah something just snapped when I saw my home blasted to so much wreckage.

Lady - The new ship is almost ready.

Dorvos - Yes but it will take time until its my home...
(singing)

Time will he-al all wounds
Sure as the rising of the moons
Until then just reme-m-ber
The name of that place in your heart
Let it see you through the rain and the thunder
The name of the place where you got your start

Just hold on to the memories
More value than all the grand treasuries
Just hold onto the memories
Charles Phipps

02-20-07, 08:54 AM		OOCrystalforged: By the way Silver, I've noticed you haven't gotten back to Kittens plotline in quite awhile and she's been showing up on the ship more and more so are we just going to assume she's come back by this point, presumable reasonably well adjusted by this point?

When first we saw returned Kitten, he was Lilly's Summoned Mount.

:-)

One has to wonder what the story devolved too.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-20-07, 09:57 AM		OOPaulon: These kids are natural lycanthropes... so with them chewing on anyone who bugs them does this mean the crew of the new FF is going to get a lot hairier come the next full moon? Or even some of the EBNEs?
OOC: They're DNA is half-lycanthrope, the state between lycanthrope and shifter. Normally they wouldn't be able to pass it on, but it's up to Kaizer.
3. It is wrong to slit Harry Potter's throat in order to get his.

4. Because in America, it's a SORCERER'S stone.

5. ...yes I realize that's stupid.
OOcat: It makes more sense that Philosopher's Stone. What's it going to do, make me able to spout platitudes at me and engage in inscrutable dialogue?
101 Rules for Lilly and Ivy
13: I warned you—

Lilly: No!

Ivy: Oh no.

13: Sorry, but it appears you need to be brought in line:

Now presenting the TRUE story of what happened on the Galan Brother's journey! Or should I call them…………Ted and Sal?

Lilly and Ivy: *embarassment for which there is no smiley*

Metalless Alchemist, pt. 1! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=06jSSfYs-fg)
Metalless Alchemist, pt. 2! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ev2UO-2LB4)
Metalless Alchemist, pt. 3! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMDwFXU6l8E&mode=related&search=)
(OOC: You have to only read the large white text.)
[B]OOCrystalforged: By the way Silver, I've noticed you haven't gotten back to Kittens plotline in quite awhile and she's been showing up on the ship more and more so are we just going to assume she's come back by this point, presumable reasonably well adjusted by this point?
OOcat: Well adjusted? WELL? Heck no! She's been………………*mph*

OOC: No plot spoilers! My answer is that I'm going to adjust Kitten more than just illusioning her. I don't really have any problem with Kitten being used right now, but I was kinda keeping her away so that she could be rather surprised when she returns in preparation for showing off her new attitude. (Crystal, if you really want Kitten PM me and I'll let you in on what's going to happen with the plotline so you can successfully portray her new personality.)

Hey, I've got an idea: make this new person who everyone thinks is Kitten be Kanatash and Caralot's next kid. Everyon just thinks she's Kitten because they look exactly the freakin' same.
rampant

02-20-07, 10:29 AM		Ok just a thought experiment here, looking at the kids.
Can you imagine what the next set will look like?
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-20-07, 11:39 AM		Ok just a thought experiment here, looking at the kids.
Can you imagine what the next set will look like?
OOC: Not sure I want that much of a headache.
Charles Phipps

02-20-07, 11:48 AM		I just like the idea of Kitten as Lilly's mount.

Lilly: I expected you to be bigger.

Kitten: So did I.

Lilly: Where do I put the saddle.

Kitten: I thought I rode *you*?

Lilly: Did I accidentally get Animal companion by mistake?
rampant

02-20-07, 11:57 AM		Tirmek - I thought you had a celestial mount, Buttercup the winged unicorn.

Lily - Oh like I'm going to strike fear into evil-doers riding a my little pony reject.

Buttercup - Whiny (i'll have you know I turned them down not the other way around)

Tirmek - And this is so much more masculine:rolleyes:

Kitten - (in the saddle) Yah mule!

Lily - You're one to talk dress-boy.

Tirmek - I do not crossdress in women's clothing!

Sarah - Technically true.
Crystalforged

02-20-07, 12:58 PM		OOcat: Well adjusted? WELL? Heck no! She's been………………*mph*

OOC: No plot spoilers! My answer is that I'm going to adjust Kitten more than just illusioning her. I don't really have any problem with Kitten being used right now, but I was kinda keeping her away so that she could be rather surprised when she returns in preparation for showing off her new attitude. (Crystal, if you really want Kitten PM me and I'll let you in on what's going to happen with the plotline so you can successfully portray her new personality.)

Hey, I've got an idea: make this new person who everyone thinks is Kitten be Kanatash and Caralot's next kid. Everyon just thinks she's Kitten because they look exactly the freakin' same.
OOC: Actually, rather than have it be a new kid I'd rather go with it being an alternate since if I ever get around to creating another kid for Kanatash and Caralot I want it to be just as mindbending as their first born. Even more so if I can manage it.

That said I really don't need to know whats everything thats going on with Kitten for the moment at least, I'm just curious if she was back or when she would be. You hadn't done much with her for a while so I was half wondering if you had forgotten.
Charles Phipps

02-20-07, 01:03 PM		I assume its Kitten from a previous period in history.

probably brought by Schroedigger.

What does Shroedigger do? Well, Shroedigger has the power to travel through time and alter reality at will.

He's the guy who brings all of the various bad time posts together!

Why everyone can use everyone no matter where they are!

Jarlot: So that's why I'm still here.

Michael: What about Doog?

Still dead.
Crystalforged

02-20-07, 01:25 PM		OOC: Meh, doesn't matter too much to me either way as long as the stuff is understood to be non-canon or questionable canon at best.



OOCrystalforged: So, any ideas, any ideas on what to do about the dragons yet?

Kanatash: Well I think I have a couple of aces up my metaphysical sleeve, I'm just planning to wait until a properly momentus occasion to unveil them.

OOCrystalforged: :rolleyes: Drama Queen.

Kanatash: Shaddup you.
Charles Phipps

02-20-07, 01:27 PM		of course.

"Meow."

Ignore the sound from my luggage.

"HELP! HELP! HE'S TRYING TO KIDNAP ME!"

Okay fine, Crystalforged, you've created a character we all love and I want it!

;-)
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

02-20-07, 02:21 PM		Chance Random [solemn but sardonic tones]: “Gentlemen, the time has come, to talk of many things. Of prophesy and sealing wax, and whether fools have wings, of why the sun is boiling hot, of anarchy and kings.

The dragons are a mighty foe, intelligent, skilled in arcane arts, deadly in any physical battle. This will not be a conflict beaten by addressing there strength. But one won from there weakness. Politically they are a council, witch is to say they are grudge and vendetta and conflict forced into proximity and bound by a temporary cause. They are forewarned by prophesy, and long lived. Faced with novelty they are inclined to question there readings of the skein, to hold off, debate. They will question one another’s readings given luxury to do so. And dragons proud as they are, will not lightly accept such questioning.

I suggest that rather than fighting them, witch only strengthens there resolve and unity by presenting common foes, we seek to erode that unity, turn wyrm upon wyrm, let there blood be shed by there claws.

They trust the prophesy but it is flawed, foretells seaming, not the underlying reality. And in taking dominion of this continent they then must rely upon agents who can be imitated, infiltrated, turned.

Control what they see in the prophesy, what there agents tell them, foster paranoia and internal division, isolate them from an already rebellious populace, and finally set them at each others throats, this my friends shall lead them to there final act.

Lastly, to plan is to be predicted, where ever you can decide not by planning but by luck, let coins be your advisers, dice your ministers." he bows.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-20-07, 02:31 PM		Edit: OOC: Damn it Eled! did you really have to post while im writing this?

IC:

Faralldralax Survyed his new domain, his draconic eyes taking in the sight of the City below, The humans called this place "Sharn", and Faralldralax had to admit it did have a certain charm to it. but it was a pale shade compared to the work of his kin. as he brought his eyes up to the sky, somthing flashed.
and the last thing that Faralldralax remebered was the bright glare of the spell's energy as it struck him..

***

Magradan growled as he watched spells rain down on the city, destroying key targets. He sent out a pulse of magic and created a shield about him. so at last the angels had come. just as his lords had predicted.

***

In the air above Central a shimmering portal of energy appeared, and emerging from it a host of angels. their silver armour glittering in the morning's light. Their white feathered wings spread out as they decended on the ward.
Leading them, Flew Selaphiel, Clutched in his right hand was a long sword, its form blazing with blue flames. Selaphiel sent out telepathic commands as he dropped lower, beneath him he could see the lumbering forms of dragons as they took wings and the scuttling of various land bound creatures as they took on positions.

Setting his sights upon the glistening scales of a Silver dragon he drew on his magic, the syllabels of his spell pouring from his lips and positily crackling with energy. Blue Dragon Mark like runes formed about the dragons wings, binding them so it couldnt fly.
It fell to the earth with a piercing scream. Selaphiel held back the sorrow he felt for killing such a beautiful creature, there would be time for sorrow later.

***

Zafrire swung his warhammer with all his might, brining it down on the skull of the Green Dragon he fought. with a vile cracking noise, the dragon died.
Zafrire lifted his warhammer again and charged into the fray against a group of Seren soldiers that emerged from a nearby building.

He grimaced at the sickining crack of bones as his Warhammer struck true.

Zafrire: (ihh) Such a waste of life.

in mere moments only one of the Seren's stood alive. Zafrire turned upon it his gaze steady and lifted his warhammer. it paled and fled its weapon dropping from its hands. Zafrire watched it leave before turning back to the fray. Thanking the soverigns for sparing some lives...

***

Feal-Thas and his squad advanced over the bodies of their opponents, blood dripped from their weapons as they surveyed the now cleared square of free space.

Feal-Thas: twelve of you keep the perimiter clear, You two begin setting up the portal.

Feal-Thas glanced up at the sky, and saw the battle raging on above, the Angels darted amoungst the dragons their smaller size giving them me grace.
The Dragons and angels battled, and even from this distance, Feal-Thas could see the ferocious intensity of their combat. Tearing his eyes from the sight he focused on the task at hand, and began sending out telepathic commands to the other squads.

So far they where winning. they'd caught the dragons upprepared by oppening up on so many fronts, but with the dragons natural strenght and magical ability this advantage wouldnt be held for long.

***

Blood splashed over his Face as Sithis decapitated a Serene. the barbarians where far from equal to his ability, their lives where cut down like Corn before the scythe. turning he slashed another Serene across the chest and was rewarded by the feel of its lifeforce being extinguished.
Sithis faught the urge to lick the blood from his lips and continued fighting. feeding would come later...
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-20-07, 02:38 PM		Naz'roth: Chance, you're idea intrigues me. unfortunatly you arrived just as our assualt was underway. we can't pull out now, if we do then the dragons will be in a position to enact a counter attack, we cannot allow them to enter this place, if they do it could be disterous for us all.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

02-20-07, 03:05 PM		Chance "Nor need we Naz'roth. I have people waiting, in this bllody anarchy many of the drgons agents will fall, I have a list, agents who sre not to be reported dead, nor bodys found, mean and woumen my people are posed to replace. It is not enough though, I will need magic, and more agents to put on the propper play, I will need your aid to gather them. But for now kill thses men, and see that no trace of there deaths lingers, and i will asemble our cast of masks." hands Naz'roth a scroll of names. "Oh anf if you are able, pick a councelour, an underdog idealy, and completly spare his new holdings for now... Let the others wonder why he was so lucky, what he did to earn the favour."
rampant

02-20-07, 03:53 PM		A flight of dragons is chasing Sarah through the skies, As she climbs she passes over a large patio.

Lily - *Mass Wing Bind*

The majority of the dragons crash into the patio, and find themselves restricted by lines and circles on the ground that once touched refuse to let go of the dragons or come loose from the floor.

Big Blue Dragon - What is this!

Elina - A little trick called Spell Binder. It holds onto the magical energy in anything it touches. In a place like Sharn's manifest zone there's enough ambient magic that the stuff is near immovable.

Big Blue Dragon - I suppose you're going to do to us what you did to the Red King.

Elina - No frankly you're small fry, not my target.

Tirmek - We're granting you a choice, accept a mark of justice, or greater gease preventing you from interfering further-

Dragons - NEVER! YOU MORTALS NEED TO LEARN YOU-

SKRUGGAFWROOOOM

Tirmek - Or I detonate the effect killing you all.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-20-07, 04:20 PM		Kitten: Okay, now I really feel like I'm missing something.

bald kalastar in a wheelchair: Trust me, you aren't missing anything.

Bruce: Okay, people, we're all assembled, now to get down to buisness: we know that the Villain League is holed up somewhere on Argonessen. Trouble is, that place has enough dormant volcanoes, ancient ruins, and corporate headquarters to house a multiverse-worth of villains. So, did anyone find out where exactly they're hiding?

*cricket chirp*

Kitten: Oh, yeah, this fills me with confidence. :mad:
rampant

02-20-07, 08:00 PM		Teiza - *glare*

Great Topaz Wyrm - ....They don't pay me enough for this, I'm going home.
ratslinky

02-20-07, 08:04 PM		*A group of ten dragons flew through the open air towards Gaz when suddenly SMASH the leaders of the flight slammed into a tower but despite it's massive bulk the managed to crash through it and on towards Gaz*

Gaz: *Gaz watched from a tower to the side of the dragons flew into his trap. And just as they got to his illusion he cast his spell suddenly a massive green ripped into the red beside him and breathed his acid into the red's heart. Similar fight where going on between all the dragons and then the barrage came wave after wave of fireballs with energy admixture lightning hit the dragons killing many. And then Gaz charge silent and swift through the ranks of dragon avoiding fireballs and cutting down the dragons left and right. Then as soon as he had killed them all he teleported down into a group of Serens cutting so many so quickly that it looked like there was a wall of blades* Looks like you guys chose the side doesn't it

*As Gaz massacred the Serens Mareth set up a massive defensive ward the covered the entirety of Dura that would destroy wings of all dragons who entered it*
urial angel of death

02-20-07, 08:46 PM		A foul smell filled the air around Sharn. With it came a series of horrible moans filled with enorous hatred to make Satnak pause. It took all of the dragons' combined willpower to not break and run.
The moans steadly increased in both volume and intensity. Slowly an army of ghostly figures faded into existance on the streets, on the fallen towers, and even in the air itself. They were the citizens of Sharn burning with unimaginal anger and a desire for only one thing, revenge; a revenge they would be shortly given.

Volrath: Welcome back to the land of the living good people of Sharn. I give you a choice either go back to you afterlife full of rest and enthropy or risk your souls to destroy the villians who took you lives, your families, and your homes!

The sky of Sharn exploded with a chorus of voices calling for blood.

Volrath: Very well.

Volrath begins chanting in a gutteral and savage tone in words no one of this world can recognize. Scarcely had he begun when the spirits swarmed over their fair city's broken towers. The mass of spirits and buildings was flooded with waves of eldritich energy; condencing the whole into a solid mass. It slowly rose from the ground to reveal its new shape; that of an enormous vaguely humanoid tower-creature held together by ectoplasm.

Volrath: Go and have your justice!
rampant

02-20-07, 08:54 PM		Hyrd - OoooooooooooooOW!

Ivy - Hyrd!

Hyrd - Hyrd can't feel Hyrd's wings! Can't feel wings!

Hyrd flaps his bloody stumps frantically.

Ivy - We need to get you back to the ship!

Hyrd - Can't feel wings!

Ivy - Calm down Hyrd!

Hyrd falls over, unable to balance withiut his wings.

Ivy - Hold on Hyrd I'll get you out of here!

Ivy proceeds to lead wavering and bleeding Hyrd to safety.
--------------------------------------------------------------------

Sithis - GAZ! Cool it you're burning up too much magic! You're going to backlash!

Gaz - I know what I'm doin-gahhuurrrr

Tirmek - No you don't! Your damn ward just blasted Hyrd's wings! Be careful you insolent little bugger you're burning too much power on striking, get your head in the game and be careful.
ratslinky

02-20-07, 09:06 PM		Gaz: Hey who messed with Mareth's ward she had programed it to ignore Hyrd and Feal-Thas.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

02-20-07, 09:12 PM		A White dragon crashes into the earth smashing several houses as he falls, clutching his chest in agony. Then explodes in a column of fire. Where it stood is now Ash, bloody and grinning.

Another white swoops at him from the same direction, Ash dodging smoothly, retorting with the dancing flicker of his flame lash and throwing searing hot daggers as it passes again. Burned and bloody the second white dies, plunging between the pillars of Sharn.

Ash “this is so dull-“
A vast red climbs up the tower, slowly spreads its wings, shedding chunks of white dragon and broken masonry as it does so, levels its head at Ash and roars.
Ash “Okay, so its not dull” vanishes, appearing near the base of a half broken tower a hundred floors high “Hey, big dumb and lonely! Your not a read your just a Psudodragon preparing for the Olympics. You were so dumb that when you hatched your egg shell was talking before you were. Your mother was so ugly you don’t have any half dragon siblings!”

Red lowers its head, flames in rage, a conflagration engulfing Ash, engulfing the tower, engulfing its wooden frame. The tower collapse, its vast weight crushing the dragon beneath a million tonnes of masonry.

Ash “I can kill you with my brain..." [dismissave]
rampant

02-20-07, 09:13 PM		Tirmek - I dunno how about a raging stealth caster burning his magic on strike spells too distracted to be precise! And Feal-thas doesn't have wings!
ratslinky

02-20-07, 09:28 PM		Gaz: I didn't cast it Mareth did and sorry in the heat of battle I forgot that Feal-Thas didn't have wings
Charles Phipps

02-20-07, 10:26 PM		NEW Crew members to be introduced!

Apu
Lawful Neutral Half-Rakashasa Monk 20

Apu is the ship's quartermaster and from the Lhaazar Principalities. Essentially, hired to be put in charge of the ship's dwindling supplies, Apu was under some false assumptions about what his job was to consist of. He believes that he actually runs the conveinance store inside the ship and that his job is to keep the crew from leaving with supplies unless they pay in their substantial debts from earlier quartermaster uses.

Getting past Apu for vital things like toilet paper, soap, and so on is an extremely difficult task given he is the last remaining Grandmaster Monk of the Four Elephants. The only one he lets past are Maladren whom he's confused for his lost brother and Tirmek that he thinks is his God.

"Thank you, come again."

Woogems
Chaotic Good Infinite Level Abberation

Woogems is Caralot and Kanatash's second child and quite simply, the embodiment of a billion years of Daelkyr engineering. It is an unstoppable horror that can devour all creation at once. Unfortunately, its first act was to talk to John the Keel and then be brought cookies by Aerith. This experience has horrifically scarred the poor thing and decided that ending reality isn't such a good idea after all.

It hides under umbrellas, in shadows, and so on by order of Kanatash who doesn't want its appearance to be revealed.....he's BITTERLY disappointed with his son whom is so invulnerable to attack that he can't even turn him evil.

Mittens
???

Yes, Kitten's EVIL twin whose been impersonating her all this time. Unfortunately, not exactly as evil as Kanatash wants.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-20-07, 10:36 PM		Bronze Dragon King: What is going on here?! How did discipline fail so quickly?

Bronze Dragon Duchess: We are uncertain, my lord. Our defenses have failed at key moments, illusion and diversion spells have been woven under our noses, and the city itself seems to have been constructed with the expectation that it would be demolished in the next week.

B.D. King: Find the cause as soon as possible. Our forces are superior in a long fight, but the longer the battle continues, the more difficult it will be to show these mortals we mean to save them from themselves. Avoid civilian targets as best you can.

B.D. Duchess: Yes, lord, but the citizenry also seem to have no sense of self preservation. Perhaps this has to do with the previous disasters in the area?

B.D. King: *sigh* No matter. Do what you must to repel the Angels without endangering those not fighting. They are not the primary concern. The members of the Forgotten Freedom are both more dangerous and less predictable. Beware the Chosens most of all. The willing sacrifice of the Flame's, Olladra's, and Dol Dorn's Chosen ones demonstrates their resolve.

The Duchess bows out and heads off to relay his instructions. The King of Bronze Dragons could do little but shake his head at both the mortals and the angels. These foolish humanoids had shown time and time again that they would lead themselves nowhere but down the path of destruction. What was so bad about preventing them from killing themselves and everyone else around them?

B.D. King: Perhaps now is the time for my appearance...

Elina: My thoughts exactly.

A portal of darkness opens up in the wall, and out steps the young Suferot.

B.D. King: Oh ho! She appears at last.

Elina: Then you know why I am here.

B.D. King: For my life, yes. But can you take it? It took your Mother's death to bring down the King of Red Dragons.

Elina: True enough, but at least she showed him mercy. You will receive none from me.

In response, the great King of Bronze Dragons opened his mouth, preparing to blast the greatest threat to the stability of this realm into oblivion. He was not allowed the opportunity, as his teeth smashed together from the force of Sarah's blow to his jaw, followed closely by Tirmek's Incarnate Warhammer breaking several scales on his chest, and Lilly binding his wings.

B.D. King: *rubbing his jaw* I see you've come prepared.

Elina: I should probably mention that your orders have...failed to reach their destination.

The visage of the Duchess of Bronze Dragons appeared around Elina as she grins mailciously.

B.D. King: ...you really are fools.

Elina: Fools or not, it was careless of her not to defend against me. I do believe ripping her soul from her body was one of the most enjoyable experiences in my life.

*SMASH*

Tirmek: Enough chit chat!

B.D. King: I agree.

Electricity crackles about him as he rears up. Sarah dodged his massive claws as Lilly parried a wing strike. Tirmek struck at his head, sending the blast of electricity careening off the tower as Elina pelted his fractured scales with spears of psionic ice. The great Wyrm roared at the assault. These children were uniquely suited to fighting him and his brethren. Their size made it difficult to hit them and their power was enough to disrupt his attacks.

The blows were traded for nearly an hour. His first attack with his tail had taught him the value of not doing so again, as both Sarah and Tirmek had grabbed it and flipped him onto his back. By now he was hurting a great deal, but the kids were not faring much better. Sarah was sporting several broken ribs from a wing strike, Tirmek had an unfortunate encounter with his claws, Lilly was busy wiping blood from his eyes, and Elina's bloodlust caused her to ignore the gash in her side. A momentary pause in the fighting revealed to all exactly how badly each was faring.

B.D. King: *clutching his wounds* This...this battle is pointless. We only wish to save your kind from themselves...

Sarah: *wheeze* You...killed...*wheeze* Momma!

Tirmek: *bandaging his wound* You think you know what's best for us? Who gave you the authority to determine that?

Lilly: This whole setup makes no sense if this is all there is to it. Brass Dragons are not evil! What purpose does this serve?!

B.D. King: I've been telling y-*GURK*

The Dragon found itself impaled with several dozen tentacles of shadowmatter eminating from the Midnight crystals in her gloved arm. Blood poured from the wounds as Elina's rage drove them forward. Each had found a major nerve, and were quickly following them to his spinal cord.

Sarah: Elina, stop!

Elina: I have had entirely enough of his lies.

The Dragon went limp in mere seconds, his entire nervous system destroyed. The soul was bound the Elina as she summoned the Red Dragon King's flames and consumed the empty shell. Without a word, Elina turned and opened another portal, healing her wounds as she walked through.

Tirmek: Dammit! She's no better than before!

Sarah: We didn't *wheeze* have time to do *wheeze* anything else...

Lilly: We should go. I don't want to leave her alone...
Kaizer_Ryu

02-20-07, 10:52 PM		Achika: You've been quite busy, I see.

Terra: Bite me.

Achika: But you're so obvious about it! You think I wouldn't see you undermining the Dragon's efforts? Or granting bonuses to your allies? Subtle you may be, but hidden you are not.

Terra: So? You said yourself, this struggle between us would not be a physical one. I just happen to be able to work most anywhere I like. One of the perks of being fully manifest.

Achika: Gloat all you like, little one. This victory is bitter sweet. *warps out*

Terra: We are only on round three of this war. The tide may yet turn, oh overconfident one...
ratslinky

02-20-07, 11:45 PM		Mareth: Whats happening to Elina?

Gaz: She is falling her desire for revenge is causing her to abandon all mercy. It will get worse the more souls she consumes the more powerful she becomes and my guess is when she is out of dragon souls she will look for other powerful souls I can only hope someone can stop her before that point
rampant

02-21-07, 01:37 AM		Tirmek - I guess Kitsune really is your spirit guide.

Elina - Huh?

Tirmek - A vengeance returned 3 fold.

Elina - They killed Momma.

Tirmek - The red killed lisa, achika gave the order, and whatever or whoever is behind her decisions is responsible. What you are doing is like punishing the quartermaster for giving the sniper bullets. I understand vengeance trust me, I've seen it down like this hundreds of times. Half the hunters that came after me were out for vengeance against a dead god. The rest were either random fanatics or mercs. Those I could handle without too much blood, it was the vengeance seekers I had to kill. They never stopped, just wouldn't stop, even with their skin flayed from their flesh, minds crippled from repeated psychic assault, bones cracking from the pressure they exerted upon themselves, all to kill a small boy who just happened to be the son of the one who wronged them. Is that how this is going to end! You dying at the talons of one little bantling who was smart enough, and tough enough, to get you. Because believe me power doesn't help when your foe is smart enough and desperate enough.
ratslinky

02-21-07, 04:02 AM		Copper Dragon Duke: My lord the changeling known as Gaz has requested an audience with you he says that he does not wish for further violence and if a peaceful resolution can be reached he will do his best to placate The Promise Breaker.

Copper Dragon King: Very well show him in

Gaz: Greeting your royal majesty I wish to discuss the matter of this ongoing war between Khorvaire and Argonnessen. I have met with one of your people and he informed me that of all the dragon flights yours seemed the most recipient to peace talks. If we could come to some agreement then we may be able to prevent genocide and don't tell me that you dragons would win because we both know that it's a fifty-fifty chance and thats without Elina in the mix

C.D King: Hmm very well the main thing will be to placate the Promise Breaker after the death of her mother she has become a great threat to our kind if there is some way to pla-

???: Th... Promise... coming

Gaz: Esabar? it must be her quick flee I will try to slow her down

C.D King: Very well *Teleports*

*A portal of shadow opens and out steps Elina closely followed by Tirmek, Sarah and Lilly*

Elina: Gaz what are you doing here and where is the copper dragon king

Gaz: He's gone and I won't let you follow him

Elina: Stand aside Gaz I won't let you get in the way of my revenge. If you don't let me past then I'll kill you to

Gaz: Very well if thats the way it has to be *So quickly that everyone is left gaping Gaz draws his crossbow aims fires and hits Elina in the left arm with a crossbow bolt that attack is closely followed by a wave of mental energy that leaves Elina stunned* I'm so sorry Elina but I can't let you follow him or me goodbye *and with that Gaz is gone shifting through the planes only stopping to cover his track moving on*

OORatslinky: Sorry to Kaizer if I portrayed Elina out of character in that scene
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-21-07, 07:34 AM		While the battle in Sharn rages on, the Becomin God and his followers have a group of dragons at their mercy.

Becoming God: ………and as you can see, trying to protect people from themselves is essentially a destructive spiral, for each group that controls another must in turn be controlled. It's just more sensible to let people beat each other over the heads while continually pointing out their flaws to them. So long as they don't get any on you.

Silver Dragon: Dude, that's so, like, wow. (takes a draw from his joint passed to him by a warforged)

Green Dragon: Yeah, man, everything's, like, so clear on this stuff.

Ninja leader: To masters John and :coolcthul.

Black Dragon: Make half-dragons, not war.

Gold Dragon: Peace out.

Becoming God: (i.h.h. I wonder if they'll ever realize that, as a poison, cannabis doesn't work on warforged.)
DungeonJman

02-21-07, 12:25 PM		*is in a box and begins to hammer the top on*

Brass Dragon King: What the heck is this human doing?

OODungeonJ: It's for your own good!

Nobby: He's putting himself in the +10 box of containment of irrational smiters/plot interrupters/etc.


Wait a minute...AAAAAAH!

*casts a couple of energy substituted fireballs (ice) and starts running away*
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-21-07, 12:50 PM		Naz'roth and Naur stand before a 3D image of sharn, The force commanders are dipicted as various symbols surrounded by shaded area's.

Naz'roth: Alright, currently Skyway, Central, North Edge and Travicks landing are Secure. The enemy Forces in Cliff Side have surrendered and Feal-Thas is just finishing securing the area. Currently our Forces in Dura are winning, but the enemy has managed to make a firm foot hold further down the towers. soon, we'll have managed to secure sharn proper. All the temporary Portals but the One in Skyway have been shut down, soon we'll need to begin setting up the peremenant portals and turning Sharn into Our main incursion point.

Naur: What about after that?

Naz'roth: We'll seperate the forces and get our other commanders onto Eberron. from there we'll expand outwards and take various cities and objective points. how go the evacuations?

Naur: Fine, so far we've pulled out all the survivors we've found and set them up where we can. but they're placing wont be permenent.

Naz'roth: and the priosners?

Naur: We're going to set up a Prison camp in sharn, that way we wont put our base of operations at risk. how goes espionage and Sabotage?

Naz'roth: I've put Chance in control of that. we'll get our reports soon i hope.
*turning to the Telepaths* Send orders to the commander's in Menthis and Central. i want them to support the Dura forces, im not going to turn this into a war of attrition. take prisoners if they can.

Telepath: *bowing* understood.

Naz'roth: Now that we've shown the Dragons what we can do, lets hope we've managed to frighten them a bit. that would make them more susceptable to peace talks.

Naur: I thought you where all in for mass dragon extinction?

Naz'roth: Whats the good of having a nemisis if they're dead?
rampant

02-21-07, 02:38 PM		Tirmek - I am so sick of you people running off without letting me in on the plan!

Lily - Who made you boss?

Tirmek - We voted on it remember.
----------------------------------------------

Gaz - All in favor of making Tirmek the leader of the second gen please stand.

Lily sits down only to discover someone had replaced his seat cover with a cactus. He begins the "I have needles where the sun don't shine dance" immediatly.

Gaz - Then the vote is unanimous, Tirmek wins!
ratslinky

02-21-07, 05:53 PM		Gaz: *Using a sending spell to contact Tirmek* Maybe but I take my orders pour on some common sense layer it with fake stupidity and cook it with misunderstanding. Which pretty much means that I can do whatever I want
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

02-21-07, 06:05 PM		Chanse "Ah gentlemen, I apoogise for my lateness, certain of my contacts are eccentric, there are customs that cannot be hurried. My news, like fortune blows both fair and foul. Your savage littl roll of the dice got my agents in place with in the dragonic hierachys, and I have aranged our hand so that they are set for promtion. This also serves to make the overlords more comfortable. My first reports are already gathering, initaly nothing of consequence I am afraid, potental treaths to there masks imedeate resinse to our asalt, little more.

That is the fair fortune, thus far our hand plays out as we would like it to. Now the foul. I have been unable to establish anyhing like the agent density Id like. Put simply, Im short handed, have already put all my relyable agents into play. There is a known sorce of capable agents that I know of, but I would need troops to seccure it."

Naz'roth "And what would this sorce be Chanse?"

Chanse "The Grey school, in Karnath. Its a breeding and traning camp for Changlings. Its where I was rased. Woumen are rapred by there changling wardens, the children traned, brainwashed finaly deployed as sleeper agents, disposable assasins and the like. There traned in spy craft practicaly as soon as they kick in there mothers belly. I escaped. I am the only one to do so.

Its well guarded, but its remote, and I know the lay out."

Naz'roth "How do we know your not acting on a vendeta?"

Chanse "I am acting on a vendeta, Im also geting us agents trained to my liking, agents my operations will rely upon. If you can spare me some troops I can get you spys to rival Pharlani and assasins better than anything youve seen, becase no grey school graduate has been caught. So what do you say? bet, or fold?"
rampant

02-21-07, 06:53 PM		Chalky - Bet! Even if we weren't in need of their aid, this abomination of a school must be destroyed!
ratslinky

02-21-07, 08:08 PM		Grey School Master: Full house booyah

Gaz: Ha eat my Royal flush
Kaizer_Ryu

02-21-07, 11:28 PM		OOC: Elina isn't murderous towards her fellows, just the Dragons. She wouldn't be against 'moving' him rather forcefully, but she wouldn't threaten to kill him.

IC:

The Silver Dragon Queen had proven difficult, but with the power of three Councellors, two Dukes, and three Duchesses at her disposal, it was only a matter of time. Gaz siding with the enemy had been unexpected, but these bastards would go to any lengths to stop her, even turn one of her friends against her.

Even now, she could feel their power coursing through her. The Bronze, Silver, and Green Dragon Councellors, the Bronze, Red, and Green Duchesses, and the Silver Duke had all fallen to her. The Red Dragon King's and Gold Dragon Duke's souls had been powerless to resist her. Soon...soon they would all be her slaves. Their lives would pay their debt to her, and their servitude their debt to all those who had died to serve their precious Prophecy.

This last target had been somewhat unnerving for her, though. The Silver Dragon Queen was one of them, yet...

*Several Hours Ago*

Sarah lay bleeding after she had failed to avoid the Queen's claws. Normally, she would have shrugged it off after a few moments, but three God-like and four Demi-god-like beings in less than a week was simply too much. Tirmek dragged her to the side, despite his broken arm and the blood he kept coughing up. Lilly had been struck head on with the paralytic effect of the Dragon's breath and remained unable to move. For her part, Elina was oblivious to her fractured ribs and the puncture wounds in her leg.

Elina: *wild eyed* You will die for that!

The Silver Dragon Queen then did something wholly unexpected. She placed herself in a defensive position between Elina and her three teammates.

S.D. Queen: Have you not done enough already? Look at what your vendetta had wrought! These three follow you not out of any true anger towards us, but for you! You are their friend, their family. They seek only to aid you, and you treat them as cannon fodder!

Elina: :mad: I never asked them to come with me.

S.D. Queen: You didn't have to. They would never think to let you go off alone. That much is clear at how they fight for you. They defend you and each other with all their might, and you can only see your target.

The Ancient Wyrm turned towards the wounded trio and began making gestures. Enraged by what she believed to be the Dragon's finishing move, Elina sent out a tentacle of shadowmatter, piercing the Queen of Silver Dragons in the back, just missing her spinal cord and puncturing a lung. Somehow, the Dragon managed to maintain her focus and finished the spell.

Tirmek braced himself for the inevitable attack...only to feel rejuvinated. His wounds from the last few encounters healed almost immediately. Sarah's wounds healed as well as she opened her eyes. Lilly's paralysis lifted as his injuries were also repaired. Much to her own amazement, Elina's ribs reassembled themselves and the blood stopped.

Elina: But...how...what.........why? WHAT ARE YOU PLOTTING?!

The shadow tentacle grew several short spikes, embedding itself in the Dragon's body. The Queen had not healed herself, and gave a slight wimper at the pain.

S.D. Queen: *sadly* I plot nothing, young Breaker of the Prophecy. But I cannot accept such unfettered cruelty. My brethren and I cannot stop you by force, that much is written. I only hope you do not lose more of what you hold dear in your efforts to avenge what cannot be undone. If taking my life will satisfy you, then you may have it. In exchange, I entreat you, do not pave the way to the future with the blood of your family...

Confused for a moment, Elina stared at her. There was no lie she could detect from the Dragon's speech. No malice, no ulterior motive. Her mind could not, no, would not process this. Angered at her own hesitation, she ended the reign of the Queen of Silver Dragons. The spikes growing from the embedded tentacle pierced each internal organ and continued to grow until they broke the surface of her skin, making the now deceased Dragon look like a macabre pin cushion.

*back to now*

Elina: That look was almost like Momma's...

She stopped as a look of hate crossed her face. THAT was the game, huh? Those bastards knew no shame. Trying to stop her with so underhanded a method as using her fondest memories against her. This would not go unpunished!

Elina: *clenching her fists* I swore they would pay, and pay they will. I will hunt them to my last breath! *screams to the sky* YOUR DEATH WILL BE AVENGED!!!!!

OOC: More later. I think you'll like what comes next.

Or not. I'm doing it anyway. :D :P
ratslinky

02-22-07, 12:56 AM		*The remaining Kings Queens and councilors of the dragons sat in their meeting room discussing the fate of their fallen brethren. All that is except the copper dragons so far they had sent no representative to the council*

Blue Dragon Queen: We must assume that the coppers have fallen though it is strange we did not sense it *As she finished a portal of light opened and through it stepped Gaz*

Gaz: Kings and Queens of the dragons I have come to tell you to move now and try to find a place to hide. Elina still walks the path of revenge and she will come for you soon. The Copper king followed my advice and has begun plane shifting all over the place not resting for long. Quickly I can sense her signature approaching make your self scarce.

*As he said that a portal of shadow started to open. the dragons quickly departed. Gaz just stood there waiting for Elina and the rest of them to come out and it didn't take long for that to happen*

Gaz: *in a mock sweet voice* Hello Elina still on a path of revenge I see.

Elina: You b*****d you warned them you really have sided with them I didn't really want to kill you before just stop you from doing it again but you forced my hand *She shot her shadow barbs at Gaz piercing his skin flesh and heart*

Gaz: So you really have fallen haven't you I only hope there is still time for you to redeem yourself *And with that he breathed his last*

*Tirmek, Lilly and Sarah rush over to Gaz dead form*

Sarah: Elina how could you

Elina: I had no choice he sided with the enemy *Elina saw Gaz's soul and bound it to her not looking particularly hard at it she already knew what it could do. If she had look harder at it she would have seen it smile*

*Off in a distant plane of existence Gaz smiled oh how he loved the fact that he didn't need a body and now he didn't need a soul and he could create copy's of his as well*

OORatslinky: Hm I on second thoughts thats to powerful I'll tone it down a little in my next post
ratslinky

02-22-07, 02:28 AM		*This entire encounter takes place in Gaz's mind scape*

*Gaz is relaxing right now*

Elina: Hello Gaz

Gaz: How did you get in here

Elina: You opened a pathway when you sent that copy soul into bondage and now your going to pay

Gaz: Not likely the terrain is mine and I can do with it what I will

Elina: We'll see about that you should know that you aren't all powerful in your mind there are ways to beat you *She sends a trident of lightning flying at Gaz but a wall of earth come in it's way and blocks it then a wall of earth hits her from behind sending her flying to Gaz's feet*

Gaz: Elina I spent the first four years of my life fighting in my mind you couldn't hope to beat me in it. But just to show you I don't really hate you I'll tell you something that soul was an evil goblins now while I can't make copies of people who are equal in power to me I can do it to those less powerful. And just remember as long as even an atom of my soul exists I can recreate it. Now goodbye Elina *Elina is sent flying from his mind*
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-22-07, 08:26 AM		Bunny: Hmmmm……………Okay, new plan: kill Elina.

Silver: ………………Yeah, okay. :bored:

Bunny: Now Silver, I know—what?!?! :eek:

Silver: Dragons are my best breeders. I'm sorry, but the needs of the template voted Most Indicative Of Why There Are So Few Of The Original Creature outways the needs of a girl who can't get it together long enough to realize it's better to make half-breeds, not war.
Charles Phipps

02-22-07, 08:36 AM		Really, what would any D&D game be without Monty Python and the Holy Grail?

Guard Who goes there?

Lilly : It is I, Lilly, son of Rose Galan, from the ship of Freedom Forgotten. King of the Cyreans, defeater of the Rakashasa, Sovereign of all Galifar!

Kitten: When did you become all that?

Lilly: Well everyone else is dead, why not me?

Kitten: Oh.

Guard : Whose the other one!

Lilly : I am, and this is my trusty servant Kitten . We have ridden the length and breadth of the land in search of knights who will join me in my court at Throneport. I must speak with your lord and master.

Guard : What? Ridden on a little Hello Kitty analogue?

Lilly : Yes!

Guard : You're using coconuts!

Lilly : What?

Guard : You've got two empty halves of coconut and you're bangin' 'em together.

Lilly: She wouldn't let me ride on her!

Guard: With good reason! That thing is freakishly deformed there! Looks all like a Sarlonan manga character!

Lilly : So? We have ridden since the snows of winter covered this land, through the kingdom of Aundair, through...

Guard : Where'd you get the coconuts?

Lilly : We found them.

Guard : Found them? In Aundair? The coconut's tropical!

Lilly : What do you mean?

Guard : Well, this is a temperate zone

Lilly : The swallow may fly south with the sun or the house martin or the plover may seek warmer climes in winter, yet these are not strangers to our land?

Guard : Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?

Lilly : Not at all. They could be carried.

Guard : What? A swallow carrying a coconut?

Lilly : It could grip it by the husk!

Guard : It's not a question of where he grips it! It's a simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not carry a one pound coconut.

Lilly: Maybe it was a DIRE Swallow!

Guard: A dire swa....who the hell ever heard of a Dire Swallow!?

Lilly : Well, it doesn't matter. Will you go and tell your master that Lilly the Court of Cyre is here. I am trying to assemble a force to oppose the Dragons and free our land from their tyranny!

Guard : Listen. In order to maintain air-speed velocity, a swallow needs to beat its wings forty-three times every second, right?

Lilly : Please!

Guard : Am I right?

Lilly: Oh fine, let's try the next castle.

*A cow is launched at them*

Lilly: Alright, let's not.
Charles Phipps

02-22-07, 08:56 AM		Sir Lilly and the Quest for more cannon fodder against the Dragons

IC:

Kitten: YA! YA!

*Kitten rides on the back of Lilly and beats him regularly with a riding crop*

*Then suddenly an arrow hits Kitten and knocks her off into some bushes*

Lilly: Oh no! Kitten has been killed!

Kitten: No, no. Still alive.

Lilly: Oh no! Kitten has been mortally wounded!

Kitten: The arrow seems to have been nerf actually.

Lilly: Nerf! Those fiends! They knew exactly most most dreaded allergy!

Kitten: You're allergic to foam rubber?

Lilly: Wait, a letter. *reads* Help, I've been trapped by my father and forced to marry against my will. Please help.... YES! THIS IS THE ANSWER I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR!

Kitten: How to get laid since Elina won't give you the time of day?

Lilly: Yes! No! I mean, this will allow me the secret to finding some way to redeeming her.

Kitten: Cause the last time you had sex was when you and Tirmek tried the Sarah snacks mixed with Aerith's special Carot Juice and Peyote healing potions...

Lilly: We promised we'd never speak of that again.

*draws Bastard Sword of Malicious Berserkable Reaving +8

Lilly: YOU SHALL BE AVENGED KITTEN!

Kitten: I guess, I'll just sit here and play with Buttercup who you refuse to ride.

The Wedding of Princess Sarah with Prince Oargev

King Steve: Well, it looks like we'll be able to unite the disparate armies of the Kingdom together at last. Then we'll use them to repulse the Dra....

Lilly: HAVE AT YOU!

*scenes of unimaginable violence occur while Lilly uses an optional rule for temporarily gaining a Barbarian's 'Rage' ability mixed with smiting*

*the camera is quickly covered with blood*

*the sounds of screams continue while the image is replaced of Kittens playing in order to avoid shocking the audience*

Lilly : *kills the guards at the door and kneels down at the Prince's feet* Oh, fair one, behold, I am you humble servant Sir Lilly. I have come to take...

*sees its the Prince of Cyre whom is decidedly....less than masculine*

Lilly : Oh, I'm terribly sorry!

Prince Oargev : You got my note!

Lilly : Uh, well, I got a note.

Prince Oargev : You've come to rescue me! I knew someone would! I knew that somewhere out there, there must be someone who

[Music swells]

King Steve : Stop that! Stop it! Stop it!

[Music stops]

King Steve : Who are you?

Prince Oargev : I'm your loyal vassal and nephew!

King Steve : No, not you!

Lilly : I am Sir Lilly, sir. Paladin of Dol Arrah and pretender to the throne of Galifar.

King Steve: Good you admit that. Most pretenders don't.

Prince Oargev : He's come to rescue me uncle!

Lilly : Well, let's not jump to conclusions.

King Steve : Did you kill all those guards?

Lilly : Um... oh, yes! Sorry.

King Steve : They cost fifty gold each! Look in the players guide!

Lilly : Well, the thing is, I thought your nephew was a lady.

King Steve : Well, I can understand that.

Lilly: Well I hope I haven't interupted the wedding.

King Steve: I'm marrying my daughter to my nephew.

Lilly: Errr excuse me.

King Steve: It's the Brelish way!

Lilly: That explains a great deal.

King Steve: Now, whose going to pay for this! You only killed the bride's mother, you know.

Lilly: Well, I didn't mean to.

King Steve: Didn't mean to? You put your sword right through her head!

Lilly: Oh dear... are you upset?

King Steve: The money saved in divorce settlements is actually pretty considerable. So, you're from....where now exactly?

Lilly: Oh, Skull Island. I'm a Prince of Valenar amongst other things

King Steve: Hmmmm....

*pushes Oargev out the window*

King Steve: I'd like you to meet my daughter.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-22-07, 10:32 AM		Lilly: Maybe it was a DIRE Swallow!

Guard: A dire swa....who the hell ever heard of a Dire Swallow!?
Later on that same guard is patrolling his battlement when he gets hit by a white substance from the sky which we shall here refer to as poop for censorship reasons.

Guard: Darn birds!

Just then he hears a monstrous tweet, and looks up.

Unfortunately he doesn't see much. In fact, he doesn't technically "see" anything after that, insofar as spirits have eyes.

When his comrades come to check on why he hasn't returned to the guard tower for their weekly poker game, they find a large mound of, what shall be refered to here for reasons of free speech, as a giant pile of white S**T.

13: So you actually managed to create a biological bomber.

Bunny: :devil:
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-22-07, 10:33 AM		King Steve: I'd like you to meet my daughter.
Princess Sarah takes one look at Lilly, and says: "I wish Garland would kidnap me right now."
rampant

02-22-07, 10:46 AM		Garland - There's no such thing as forest kobolds! There's no such thing as forest kobolds! There's no such thing as forest kobolds! There's no such thing as forest kobolds! There's no such thing as forest kobolds!
Charles Phipps

02-22-07, 11:34 AM		Garland - There's no such thing as forest kobolds! There's no such thing as forest kobolds! There's no such thing as forest kobolds! There's no such thing as forest kobolds! There's no such thing as forest kobolds!

The secret masters behind this war.

;-)
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-22-07, 12:16 PM		Somewhere deep within the jungles of Argonessen a group of oddly-dressed kobolds dances around a boiling cauldron. The image in the water flickers between the various aspects of the war.

Forest Kobolds: Hoona igna chowa neha! *repeat*

Let's turn on our tongues spell and find out what that means:

Forest Kobolds: Drama lord will soon rise again! *repeat*
ratslinky

02-22-07, 05:02 PM		That group of posts is the best I've seen in a long time everyone who participated can have a :heehee
Crystalforged

02-22-07, 05:32 PM		The battle for Sharn still rages in the skys. Flights of dragons wheel through the air, ravenging everything in their path. Meanwhile volleys of arrow and bolts descend on the great beasts from every direction. Airborn foes strike hit-and-run against their less manueverable adversaries. Spells of great power are hurled by both sides. Amazingly while it has sustained considerable damage, Sharn has actually managed to blow up. Much to the surprise of its residents, this is actually an all time record. Meanwhile, on the top of one of the towers, Kanatash relaxes in a deck chair with sunglasses, a glass of lemonaid, and some sun tan lotion.

OOCrystalforged: In truth I'm not at all surprised to see you trying to get a tan in the middle of a major battle. What I really want to know is where you managed to get ghost touch sun tan lotion.

Kanatash: (shrug) What can I say, I know people. Now what can I do for you?

OOCrystalforged: I just thought I should let you know there's a flight of dragon reinforcements heading this way. Due any minute now actually.

Kanatash: (not reacting at all) Is that so.

OOCrystalforged: :ahem: AHEM.

Kanatash: (lifing up his sunglasses) What?

OOCrystalforged: I thought you said you had a couple of tricks up your sleeve?

Kanatash: (settling back down) Oh, THAT. I told you, I'm waiting for a suitable dramatic moment.

OOCrystalforged: If you keep waiting for that you're lible to miss the entire plotline. So how about you just do it now?

Kanatash: Hmph, *mumble* no respect for an artist at work *mumble* Fine, have it your way. (snaps fingers)

At about the same time the dragon's reinforcements appear over the horizon. Within moments they are almost upon the city. At the moment Kanatash snaps his fingers, half if this flight suddenly turns on the other half, rending them limb from limb. These dragons then descend to land on the towers surrounding where Kanatash is relaxing, pause for a moment, and then bow before him.

Green Dragon: We have done as you have commanded oh deranged lord.

OOCrystalforged: :uh-huh: (stares at Kanatash)

Kanatash: What? You thought my cults were only composed of humans? I have better taste than that! After all, dragons are much more satisfying worshipers.

OOCrystalforged: That much I can understand, but how did you manage to convert them?

Kanatash: Oh, that much was easy. The dragons want to understand the prophecy, which by its very nature is more complex than the mortal mind can comprehend. Now who do we know that specializes in things the mortal mind was not ment to comprehend, hmm? After that it wasn't all that hard. Dragons are a lot like humans when it comes temptation, they just tend to think bigger.

OOCrystalforged: Alright, but I still see a problem. How are our forces going to tell which dragons are supposed to be friendlies?

Kanatash: Oh, that really won't be an issue. (turning to the dragons) Ok, its alright now, you can all shed your disquises.

As the magic fades many, MANY, strange and varied sights can now be seen. The scales green dragon who adressed Kanatash earlier take on a smoother appearance and in place of a head he has what appears to be a giant pink flower bud which then opens to reveal his face. In the case of the brass dragon next to him has taken on a bluish color and he now has a large turtle-like shell around on his back with what appears to be cannons protruding from it. A Topaz dragon has his limbs grow more stubby as well as a pair of large red dimples appearing on his face. His tale has grown flat and jagged.

OOCrystalforged: :twitch: :nonono: You spliced them with Pokemon DNA didn't you.

Kanatash: :rolleyes: Brilliant deduction. (turning back to the dragons) Now fly my pets, fly! (the dragons take off to join the battle)

OOCrystalforged: :doh: (watches dragons fly off) I though you said you had a couple of tricks, as in, more than one.

Kanatash: Oh, well I have one more, but that one has actually already been put into action. Just wait and see.
rampant

02-22-07, 06:51 PM		Liam - We have the first pylon installed.

Satnak - Good, how long until the others are buried?

Liam - What others?

Satnak - You mean to tell me you didn't create all five pylons!

Liam - Well no we thought we should just get this one installed and use it as a becaon.

Satnak - ... Get back to work If production on the last four pylons is delayed much further, you all die.

Liam - Yes'm!
Kaizer_Ryu

02-22-07, 07:04 PM		OOC: Still a bit out of character for Elina. She blames the Dragons, believing they've brainwashed Gaz or something similar. If you all haven't noticed, she is beyond reason. She knows revenge and little else due to her mind remaining out of balance.

And the Kings and Queens of the dragons are the Acendant Councellors.

IC:

Elina: Let...me...GO!

Sarah: Not...until...you...calm...down!

Elina struggles vainly to escape Sarah's grip. Her assault on Gaz, regardless of her reasons, had crossed the line. Sarah had her arms wrapped under Elina's and her hands crossed behind her sisters head, fully restricting upper body movement as she held her to the ground. Tirmek had her legs pinned as well, yet still she struggled.

Elina: You don't get it, do you?! They're turning us against each other! We can take them in a straight fight, so they resort to sowing dissention!

Sarah: For the love of Mom, LISTEN to yourself! Have you completely lost your mind?!

Elina: I've never seen so clearly in my life! I have a purpose, a destiny! And so help me, if I'm playing a role, I'm damn well going to play it to my advantage!

Tirmek: You're going to get yourself killed! Did you hear anything the Silver Dragon Queen said?!

Elina: LIES! SQUISHY LIES!

Dr. Nefarious: That's my line!

All: :uh-huh:

Dr. Nefarious: Oh, for the-! I'm in the wrong world! *at no one in particular* This isn't funny, Lawrence! *teleports out*

Tirmek: Did it ever occur to you that what you're doing is worse than what you're fighting?!

Elina: They...killed...Momma! Nothing I do could ever compare to that!

Lilly: And your actions would make her happy?

Elina stopped struggling at that. In her bloodlust, she had always thought that what she did, she did for her Momma. When it came down to it, the answer to that question should have been simple.

Elina: ...

Lilly: Do you honestly believe what your doing is something she would approve of?

Elina: ..............................no... :(

Lilly: Then what meaning does your revenge have, if it does not honor the memory of the one in whose name you declared it in?

Elina: I............but.............they....... .......she...

Sarah: We all suffered when Momma died, sis. We're still suffering. I just can't bear to see you discard everything Momma taught us just for this...

Tirmek: Revenge is not justice, and hate is not reason. What good is your crusade if you lose yourself on the way?

Lilly: We all know this is difficult for you. You were only just starting to recover from a horrid betrayal when this tragedy struck. But you must believe us when we tell you that this is too much.

Elina paused for several minutes, staring at Lilly. She knew they were right, but had merely refused to see it. In the end, only one response came to mind.

Elina: I-I-I-I wwwwwwwwant.........my M-m-m-m-momma........

Sarah and Tirmek finally disengaged now that she had calmed down. Lilly knelt in front of Elina, brushing her hair from her eyes as she struggled to sort out her conflicting motivations. Before any of them could blink, Elina tackled Lilly and began sobbing profusely.

Tirmek: ('pathing Sarah) I still don't get why she likes him...

Sarah: (back) How many people say the same thing about us?

Tirmek: (again) Touché...

Lilly: Does this mean you like me again?

*thump*

Lilly: Ow...
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

02-22-07, 07:22 PM		Ash is feeding a mix of Sulphur and Charcoal to a dire swallow “Soon my pretties soon phase 2 will be ready.” :mage: (OOC: Conflagration cup idea ended out less funny than I planned, we will assume it was cancelled due to invading dragons)
*****

Chance “Well then to planning, They Grey school is built like a fortress, Kundarak was retained for the work and it similar in principle to there vaults. The perimeter wall is built to resist a siege but that’s the least of out worries.

The Karns were under no illusion about the purpose of the guards when it was built. Each as goggle of true sight, we wont trick our way in, and modified message centres are arrayed through the complex. They will kill the mothers and students if they have to, to stop them leaving.

Nor can we rely on there aid, the ones who ae awake are brainwashed, less freewill than ‘forged. And there in the minority. The dorms and most other areas of the school have a powerful sleep spell woven over them, only those eating or in training are awake at a given time, and intruders are swiftly dealt with by the field.

Guards are a mix of living and Karnathi undead, and since my escape they will be patrolling sleeping areas, we need to get in, deal with the defenders and the changeling wardens, then get around 500 shape shifting spies and trained murderers, around 200 women mostly expecting and traumatised, and an unknown number of children, all of whom will have some combat training, aboard. Once that’s don I can free them from there conditioning.

lastly the Headmaster as he styles himself, is mine. I’ve looked forwards to this for ten years. Any questions?”
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-22-07, 07:23 PM		OOCrystalforged: :twitch: :nonono: You spliced them with Pokemon DNA didn't you.
Descending on the hoards along with Kanatash's Pokédragons are many tiny, yappy blue puppies with bobbles growing out of their heads and batlike wings seemingly too small to keep them aloft.

OOKaizer: But the moogle I gave you was male—

OOcat: Doog Jr.

OOKaizer: Oh, right.

Silver: :D
Lilly: Does this mean you like me again?

*thump*

Lilly: Ow...
Silver: Nice to see a young person with their priorities straight.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-22-07, 07:43 PM		So, in Caralot's dimesnion………

Kitten: So what the :censored: do we do now?

Bruce: We just wait for the villains to call up and draw us into their trap.

Kitten: They're just going to call you up and tell you where they're hiding?

Bruce: No, no, it'll probably be some dummy location where they can put us in one of their rediculously slow-moving deathtraps while they then explain in great detail their plan to take over the world and then inform their minions that it's time to head back to the main base, which they will reveal the name of.

Kitten: Why?

Darastrix: Because minions are always so stupid that they'd never remember the secret location.

Puck (whispering): You should hear mom chew them out for being so stupid. It's a riot.

Kitten: Say, where did all the heroes go?

Puck: Oh, they're having a bragging contest.

Kitten: :uh-huh: How incompetant do the villains have to be to keep getting beaten by these people?
************
On a wide-screen crystal ball in the secret meeting room of the world's leaders……

"One-million galifars!"

Errandis: Steve, let me handle this.
rampant

02-22-07, 08:31 PM		Tirmek - I think its time to let go. You may have a feel for souls, but i can send each where it needs to go.

Elina - Dollurh?

Tirmek - Oh hardly, in war time its common practice to set up soul traps there to snag some of the influx and use them to power various rituals and such affects. I can hasten the process that the maruts oversee in that place to covert souls into incarnum.

Elina - That sounds alot like necrocarnum.

Tirmek - It is similar, but the process used for necrocarnum focuses on chanellling a partially decayed soul into the user. What I intend to do simply releases ambient incarnum energy. Its not quite the way its supposed to work but it allows the soul to rejoin the cycle. Without providing power to our enemies.

Sarah - But certainly the dragons have no clue how to create soul traps.

Tirmek - True, but their precious prophecy sounds like one big one.
DungeonJman

02-22-07, 08:54 PM		Besides death is a stinking soul trap!

Both: Huh?

Oh right, i'm still in the stupid box.

Anyway:

*The souls of the non-bound dead are in a building, with a bunch of maruts as bureaucrats*

Marut: Next.

Guy: Well yes, i...

Marut: Be quiet. *takes out a stack of papers*

Sign here, here, here, here, here, put cause of death there, sign here, here, here, initial there, sign here, here, here, and go over to the next desk.

*buries the guy in paperwork*

Guy: Stupid afterlife...

*begins signing papers*

OOC: Yes, i know i've done this joke before, just trying to keep Dolurrh consistent.
ratslinky

02-22-07, 09:13 PM		Using varies magic items Gaz has managed to scry the entire thing

Gaz: (i.h.h) Good finally she has let go of her anger but The Shadow might still have plans I can't watch her all the time though. I need to get Esabar back she would be able to help. well it looks like thats my next mission is to gather the pieces of her soul so she may be resurrected.
ratslinky

02-22-07, 09:18 PM		At the next table a death slaadi is tell the dead what to do

Death Slaadi: Right you yes mother DIE DIE DIE *puts on clown outfit and speaks in the voice of a lawyer* would you like fries with that

Lawful Guy: :twitch:
Charles Phipps

02-22-07, 09:58 PM		A deserted mountain peak

Lilly: We seek the....BECOMING GOD!

*cheezy Power Ranger's music starts playing*

Chorus off to the side of Japanese girls: BE BE BE BE BE BECOMING GOD! BE BE BE BE BE BE BE BECOMING GOD!

*a huge seizure inducing set of colored lights plays as a gigantic robot like lifeform arises from the canyon*

Becoming God: SUPER ULTIMATE ATTACK KICK!

*Becoming God spins around and kicks one of Eberron's moons before the entire thing shatters into a million pieces*

Lilly: GAH!

*Becoming God ignores it as it causes mass extinctions on Aerenal*

Becoming God: Ultimate Power Punch!

*pulls fist back and throws a bit of energy that shoots out into the sky, passes out of orbit, and then hits a nearby planet's past that wipes out the dinosaurs*

Lilly: WOAH!

Becoming God: And finally.....VICTORY POSE!

*Aerith in a Japanese school girl's costume*

Aerith: *in broken english* Becoming God, you save us! We so happy!

*Lilly ahems a bit*

Lilly: Err....ummmm.....ahhhh....we seek....we seek....

Becoming God: YESSSSSSS?

Lilly: We seek ummm...errr....

Becoming God: A MAGUFFIN?

Lilly: Yes.

Becoming God: A Maguffin to defeat the Dragons while simultaneously helping you and Elina get back together!?

Lilly: That would be most helpful.

Becoming God: I cannot help you.

Lilly: Dammit!

Becoming God: BUT I KNOW WHERE YOU MAY SEEK THE ANSWERS YOU SEEK! THE CAVE OF THE UNKNOWN GOD!

Lilly: Really, what's it like?

Becoming God: It's a rabbit.

Lilly....Oh.
Crystalforged

02-22-07, 10:07 PM		:looloo: Alright, Charles you deserve one of these. That should mean something form me especially considering I'm not all that fond of the way these awards seem to get handed out willy-nilly sometimes. *grumble* Course that probably has a lot with my inability to nab very many of them *grumble*



:shifty: By the way this in no way means I am surrenduring my title as the craziest one on this flying asylum. You'll have to pry that from my cold, dead fingers.

And then I'll come back to haunt ya. :ghosted:
Kaizer_Ryu

02-22-07, 11:02 PM		OOC: Elina still has her stutter. It was only the "uber revenge" mode that allowed her to speak clearly. Not that it will matter much after this.

DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNN

And thanks for the unintentional setup, rampant. It works better than my original idea. :evillaugh

IC:

*in a spot not far from the FF's wreckage*

Tirmek: Ready?

Elina: *nods*

Elina stood in the center of one magic circle, Tirmek in another, and the third contained the soul trap. Tirmek began chanting as the circles glowed brightly. With a thought, Elina started to summon the entrapped souls, prepared to give them the release she had denied them.

Tirmek: *waits for a bit* Elina?

Elina: ...

Tirmek: We can still do this without them. You need to let go...

Elina: :devil: Really? Because that's not how I see it.

Sarah: Elina! You said-!

Elina: *waves her hand dismissively* Yes, yes, letting go, returning to the path of good, etcetera, etcetera. But the plan has changed. :smirk:

Tirmek: What do y-... Oh no.

Elina: Oh yes, little one. :evillaugh

Tirmek: :headexplo GET THE HELL AWAY FROM HER! HAVEN'T YOU DONE ENOUGH TO HER ALREADY?!

Sarah: WHAT?!

Shadow: Finally caught on, mutt? Your sister is far too valuable to me to just let be. *sigh* I had hoped to let her accomplish the destruction of the Dragons on her own, though. Se la vi. (I have no idea if this is how you spell that. :embarrass )

The energy flowing through the circles went wild, causing a burst that sent Tirmek flying, only to be caught by Sarah. The circles broke, the magic scattered and the trap was destroyed.

Shadow: Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some meddlers to take care of.

Tirmek: You are not getting away again! Get out before I force you out!

A quick barrage of essentia infused Incarnate Warhammers issued several shockwaves, the lesser charges effect multiplied by the waves mixing on Elina's location. He knew she could take it, but his primary goal was not to win, just to drive the diety now possessing Elina out.

Shadow: *itches her (his?) ear* Wow. That was spectacularly ineffective. But I guess you couldn't help trying. I am "borrowing" your friend's body, after all. :devil:

Sarah: RrrrrrrraaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHH HHH!!!

Sarah immediately decended upon him, completely fed up with his continuing interference with her sister's life. However, she was simply no match. Elina alone would have proven enough of a challenge, but the Dragon souls she still possessed and now the power the Shadow wielded through her made the battle almost laughably short. Tirmek didn't even have the chance to enter the fray before Sarah was eating rocks behind him.

Shadow: Thanks for the brief warmup, kid. But, like all things, it's time for me to go. Just a few loose ends to tie up. :emp:

Outstretching his (her?) hands, the Shadow sent out countless shadowmatter spikes, giving Tirmek no room to manuver as they rained upon him. All went dark just before they hit him as Sarah went shadow form and enveloped him in a defensive shield. Through the chaotic energies, he felt a strage sensation, a power like that of the Shadow's, but in addition to his. The rain of spikes stopped immediately after, and the Shadow, Elina unwillingly his prisoner, was gone. Tirmek regained his sight as Sarah returned to normal.

Tirmek: What was that other presense?

Sarah: I don't...kn...*collapse*

The damage from the Shadow's initial strike had nearly killed her, that much was certain. She had managed to ward off a similar fate for Tirmek with her quick thinking, but the energy use didn't help her condition. Quickly grabbing the Potion of Cure Critical Wounds Sarah kept in her pack, Tirmek helped her drink it, bringing her back to consciousness.

Sarah: *leaping to her feet* We have to go after them!

Tirmek: I know, but what then? No amount of strategy is going to work against a force we can't even dodge, much less take a single blow from! We need a plan. There has to be a way to drive him out, and we're going to find it!

OOC: Good call, ratslinky. You get a :detect: trophy for figuring out a plot twist.

Now if everyone (besides Charles) could figure out the rest of them...
Charles Phipps

02-22-07, 11:32 PM		OOC: Thank you for the crazy award.

I'm sure you'll get another one soon yourself.

Becoming God: Behold, the Cave of the Bunny.

Lilly: In here, we'll find the clue to help us defeat Elina and restore her sanity!

Kitten: I dunno, mayber some prozac would work?

Lilly: No, Sarah always eats those.

Sarah: I AM NOT A DRUG ADDICT!

*Quistis gives Sarah a shot in the bum which causes her eyes to glaze over before the dog girl begins drooling*

Bunny: :-)

Lilly: Man, it's just waiting for one of us to attack so it can rip us to shreds.

Sarah: It's a rabbit.

Lilly: Yes, a VICIOUS sharp toothed Bunny of Death!

Sarah: I've eaten rabbits before.

Lilly: WITH BIG POINTY TEETH!

Sarah: They are yummy in my tummy.

Lilly: LOOK AT THE BONES!

Tirmek: I believe, this is a job for our wizard.

Lilly: Yes, his advice is needed.

Tirmek: That's you reject!

Lilly: Damn multiclassing.

*pulls out his Eberron: Deities and Demigods 3.5*

Lilly: Ah ha! Here's its weakness!

Bunny: There is no weakness!

Lilly: The holy kitten of Antioch!

Tirmek: OF COURSE! THE HOLY KITTEN OF ANTIOCH!

Sarah: Yay!

*Sarah picks up a toad to kick before popping some shrooms and drooling again*

Kitten: Wait, wha...

*Kitten is hurled at Bunny*

*the cuteness of Kitten meets the death power of Bunny as the two knock heads and go unconscious*

*the heroes...or what passses for them....then rush into the cave*
ratslinky

02-22-07, 11:36 PM		OORatslinkyWell I don't know but maybe Lilly saves Elina or maybe it's a Star Wars 6 thing with Elina as Dearth Vader or Terra somehow helps to defeat The Shadow

Gaz: Oh :censored: thats just what I needed *plane shifts to Eberron and waits for The Shadow to arrive* My lord the Faceless One protect me become me so that I may slow The Shadow *Gaz begins to undergo a transformation his mouth, nose eyes, ears, hair and everything else on his face melts into a vaguely face shaped blob and his whole body starts to flicker*

OORatslinky: Kaizer Gaz won't try to kill Elina but he will try to slow her down and only kill her as a last resort but by that time he'll probably be to weak for that
DungeonJman

02-22-07, 11:42 PM		Wait, i thought the last time that somebody tried to throw a Holy ____ of Antioch, Bunny got turned into....

*Bunny turns pure white with the angelic wings again*

THE BOX HELPS NOTHING IN STOPPING INTERFERENCE!!!
rampant

02-22-07, 11:43 PM		Tirmek - *sigh* Maybe its time to play a deeper game.

Sarah - You're about to do something especially sneaky.

Tirmek - Maladren would be proud.

Sarah - Speaking of which, what are we gonna do about her?

Tirmek - Oiy this is exactly why I wanted nothing to do with my dad's organization. Do you know how many Matriarchs are at each other's throat over who's daughter will get first dibs on me! I mean for crying out loud I can't trust those ******* farther than I can throw them!

Sarah - You trust Maladren.

Tirmek - I trust her abilities, I also trust the other Rakshasa not to be able to make a better offer than a real home. Also she's not a noble, the middle classes have alot more proffessional pride, I've appealed to hers. Finally She's small enough I can throw her alot farther. But back to the plan.
-----------------------------------------------------

Silver D. Queen Soul - (private line) I understand

Elina - What was that?

Silver D. Queen Soul - A very determined young mortal with an increasingly unclear future.
Charles Phipps

02-22-07, 11:46 PM		Lilly: Actually, I've already decided on my plan.

Tirmek: You....decided...on a plan?

Lilly: Yes.

Tirmek: What?

Lilly: Yeah, well screw the whole defeat the dragons thing. I'm going to kill the Shadow then Tiamat.

Tirmek: Uhhh Lilly....you and what army?

*Lilly pulls his MUNCHKIN'S Katana*

Lilly: I'm the other son of Khyber alive. I don't need an army.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-22-07, 11:48 PM		OORatslinkyWell I don't know but maybe Lilly saves Elina or maybe it's a Star Wars 6 thing with Elina as Dearth Vader or Terra somehow helps to defeat The ShadowObviously, maybe, and maybe. It's less the "what will happen" and more the "how will it happen" that I figure I'm safe from scrutiny on. ;)

OORatslinky: Kaizer Gaz won't try to kill Elina but he will try to slow her down and only kill her as a last resort but by that time he'll probably be to weak for thatHe's welcome to try, of course, but I pity him and anyone else who does. He'd be up against a god of at least equal power to the Faceless One possessing someone with greater raw power than Gaz and chanelling four Acendant Councellors and five of their top lackeys. Soon to be more.

She's intended to be nigh unstoppable in any kind of straight fight and near immune to anything else.

There is a way, but only Charles has any inkling of what it is. :evillaugh




:blink: I'm enjoying this too much, aren't I?
rampant

02-22-07, 11:59 PM		Satnak - You should have let me bump her off when i had the chance. Stupid goddess *****, achika.

Jarlot's Ghost - I said I was sorry! How Was I supposed to know this was coming! I can't even remember what i had for breakfast!

Satnak - Maybe because you don't eat?

Jarlot - Good thing I still have my booze.

Satnak - You mean the stuff that you can't taste or get drunk off of.

Jarlot's ghost - ...:twitch:

---------------------------------------------------------

OOPhips - PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!

Jarlot's Ghost - Why is the rum gone?!
Charles Phipps

02-23-07, 12:08 AM		Tirmek: Okay, why exactly are we in a cave staring at a bunch of paintings by primitive humans.

Lilly: This is the secret to redeeming Elina!

Tirmek: Do you know that Rakashasas were already probing the distant currents of reality's edge when human beings were beating rocks against each other to make fire?

Lilly: Great, more Rakashasas are more kickass than humans speech.

Tirmek: Let's face it, the Gods made THEMSELVES in our image.

Lilly: Ah, here it is. The secret to defeating Elina is in the Castle....ARGHHhhhhhhhh.

Tirmek: The Hell?

Lilly: He must have died while writing it.

Tirmek: HE WOULDN'T CARVE IT IN THE STONE IF HE WAS DYING!

Sarah: *chewing on a ninja* Maybe he was dictating.

Ninja: Please help me.

Sarah: My chew toy squeaks!

Tirmek: That's very nice Sarah, Quistis give her another shot would you?

Quistis: No problem!

*Sarah is injected again and starts drooling again*

*Lilly has a map pulled out*

Lilly: Here we go, The Castle ARGHHhhhhhhhh.

Tirmek: What?

Lilly: Yes, a place where dreams become reality.

*begins casting teleport*

Tirmek: Can you...

*A Greater Prismatic Dire Tarrasque appears*

Tirmek: AH!

*Lilly teleports away*

Tirmek: YOU BASTARD!
ratslinky

02-23-07, 12:27 AM		OORatslinky: Ah now I get it someone must wield The Bunny Hat to kill her.

T.F.O: We won't be able to beat her alone The Shadow has equal power to me and Elina is channeling four Ascendant Councilors

Gaz: I have a plan *Gaz begins to focus and all around him souls start to appear child souls, female souls, male souls, old souls and slowly they began to change becoming more and more like Gaz and then they started growing body's and they summoned more souls till there where more than a thousand. Gaz prime fell gasping for breath* I didn't know I had limits but at least I can now slow The Shadow down. All of you divide into groups so you can have enough to guard all the dragon kings, queens and have two groups left over one to help me and one to help Sarah, Tirmek and Lilly

The rest of the Gazs: Yes master *They started to teleport to their respective dragons

Gaz: Well I still can't beat her but I can by Sarah, Tirmek and Lilly time to figure out the way to beat her

OORatslinky: Kaizer these new Gaz's won't be as powerful as Elina but they will still present enough of a challenge to slow her down. By the way if you want me to stop doing so much in this plot just ask
Charles Phipps

02-23-07, 12:34 AM		Castle Arghhhhhhh

Lilly: Ah well. Here I am.

Elina: So we meet again Lilly.

Lilly: Shadow.

Elina: I must confess that you were very stupid to come here alone.

Lilly: What I'm here for won't require anyone else.

Elina: Dying is like that.

*lilly pulled out a crystal ball then and threw it on the ground as a strange white mist poured around them*

Elina: What is this magic?

Lilly: A Kalashtar psi-crystal.

*they found themselves in the astral plane*

Elina: How disgustingly cute. You intend to fight me in my mind, as if I'm any more vulnerable here than I am in the physical world

Lilly: Here, I can attack you without hurting Elina.

Elina: Allow me to show you how stupid what you've done here is....

*Lilly was struck by mind numbing and blinding pain, pain and agony well beyond anything he'd ever suffered before in his life*

Elina: How curious....that should have killed you. Let us try again....

*Lilly was burned, bitten by hords of creeping insects, and pounded by falling ice*

*He lied still on the ground*

Elina: how disappointing.

*Lilly sliced upwards and tore at Elina's chest. A huge nightmarish gash was opened before almost immediately sealing*

Elina: What is going on?

Lilly: This is a Kalashtar Will Test. We are on the plane of dreams. Both of us will remain here until one of us chooses to submit.

Elina: Interesting....you bound me through my mortal body and Elina's wards....clever. However, I don't see how it helps you.

*The Shadow continues to torture Lilly*

Lilly: Haha...ha....

*Lilly then stabs deeper into the Shadow's chest the next time*

Lilly: I have all the time in the world to learn your moves Shadow. I'm immortal, just like you. I won't starve to death or die of exposure. Neither will Elina. We can keep hacking away at each other forever.

Elina: YOUR AGONY WILL BE UNSPEAKABLE.

Lilly: Probably, but you're not Elina. Elina is somewhere in here.....and youve never known pain as a God. It's an abstract to you. I don't have to win to die. I only have to keep fighting you forever in order to help elina stay away from your torture. I'll also VERY MUCH ENJOY making the rest of your eternal existence into torture Shadow.

Elina: You'll break first.

*Lilly was impaled with horrible spikes*

Lilly: Try me.

***

Elina's subconscious

*Elina blinks at her Alice in Wonderland like environment*

Elina: Hello?
rampant

02-23-07, 12:57 AM		Silver D. Queen Soul - It is good to see you recovering child.

Elina - You! What is happening?

S.D.Q.S. - Rose isn't the only one who gets to manipulate cliche. Tirmek knew that plot favors the heroicly stupid.

Elina - Lily, Tirmek knew lily would do something stupid and open up a chance to do something. He also probably threw in a few words in infernal about stupid idiots going off and trying to do everything without him.

S.D.Q.S. - Quite the tirade actually on and on and on and a few invectives about crazy suferot females and their incessant need to kill everything before he gets there, then this whole muttering rant about unreliable beguilers. I think the stress is getting to him.
Charles Phipps

02-23-07, 01:00 AM		OOC: Btw, Kaizer, go ahead and do your disposal of a certain critter ;-)
ratslinky

02-23-07, 01:05 AM		Gaz: Unreliable? No no no you can rely on me to be unreliable
Kaizer_Ryu

02-23-07, 01:17 AM		OOC: Yay!

IC:

*scene of crappy animation showing Sarah and Tirmek fleeing from the Greater Prismatic Dire Tarrasque*

Narrator: The valiant warriors fled from the vicious Tarrasque to no avail.

*scene of Sarah and Tirmek hiding behind a pillar, the Tarrasque passing by, them trying to sneak off, and the beast suddenly reappearing and resuming the chase*

Narrator: The beast lunged forward, and just as all hope seemed lost, the Animator suffered a fatal heartattack!

*cut to OORei drawing frantically*

OORei: Hurk! *clutches chest and falls over dead*

Narrator: And thus, the cartoon peril was ended.

*Uber Tarresque disappears from lack of animation*

Narrator: *looking very paranoid* (i.h.h.) Ok, that went well. Just need to get to the exit before he shows up.

*gets poked in the back of the leg*

Narrator: GAH!

Scias: H-h-h-h-h-hi.

Narrator: *clutching his chest* Oh, thank the gods! Sorry, little boy, but I have to g-

*CHOMP*

Narrator: NOOOOOOO!!! THERE'S MORE OF THEM!

Chalky: No, no, no! Go for the jugular! They go down easier!

Scias: H-h-h-h-hai!
rampant

02-23-07, 01:37 AM		:smirk: to kaizer for perfect Chalky
Kaizer_Ryu

02-23-07, 01:47 AM		Elina: What is this place?

Silver Dragon Queen: Your mind, or what's left of it.

Elina: This part doesn't seem so bad. The cat with a smile that became a smile without a cat was a bit freaky, but...

S.D. Queen: Oh, that was just your mischevious side. Your mind has been fragmented by the recent events as you well know. The Shadow took advantage of this and now commands you fully. Lilly took part of him to the plane of dreams, but he continues to hunt my brethren.

Elina: Question...how are you here? You should be locked up with the others.

S.D. Queen: I was the last to be imprisoned, and therefore the first to be freed. You released me partially before the Shadow overwhelmed you.

Elina: What happens if the rest of you die?

S.D. Queen: If the Councel falls, it won't be the end of the world. But if enough of our race are slain, all our work will be undone, and Tiamat will at last have her victory.

Elina: What do y-?

S.D. Queen: Now is not the time, child. You must reassemble yourself quickly. Lilly has managed to divide the Shadow's power, weakening him enough so that he cannot merely cut down each of us, but how long that dear boy can hold out is unknown.

Elina: Reassemble myself? You mean, like, find my fragments and convince them to rejoin me?

S.D. Queen: In a way. Some will be less enthusiastic than others. One in particular is determined to avoid this.

-----

Shadow: You cannot prevail against me.

Blue Dragon Queen: Against you? No. But the one you possess has limits. You cannot manifest without a host, Dark One. Eventually, you will be forced to stop.

Shadow: :devil: That is why I love this setup. This girl will regenerate, even if completely destroyed. You cannot trap her while under my influence. Bring her down and I will only tighten my grip on her! You cannot stop me!

The Queen of Blue Dragons fell beneath the Shadow. He merely grinned as his collection grew. Only the Gold, Copper, Black, and Brass Councellors remained. Once they fell, the rest would be easy pickings. However, the boy was proving to be more stalwart than anticipated. Agony unlike any his pitiful mortal mind could comprehend would not break him. Not quickly, at least. Dispair would eventually take him. It was only a matter of time.

And time was one thing he had plenty of...

OOC: Or so he thinks. :D
ratslinky

02-23-07, 02:39 AM		Gaz Prime: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!! *He grimace losing a soul was painful* ok time to step up the power *He took a fragment of The Faceless One's soul and began to copy it and then put it into his other Gaz's* Next dragon she fights she'll be up against several godlike creatures that would slow her down a lot
rampant

02-23-07, 02:41 AM		Sarah - What do we do now?

Tirmek - You mean while we wait for the plot to advance?

Sarah - Yes.

Tirmek - Well Sharn is our personal blasting grounds once more.

Sckrugafoom!

Sarah - :rolleyes: now it explodes

Tirmek - Satnak has almostgot that portal ready.

Satnak (wilding a bullhorn) - MOVE IT! PEOPLE THOSE PYLONS WON'T DIG THEIR OWN HOLES!

Ketler - If you hadjust let me-

Satnak - Nothing that require's my daughters in plugsuits pervert.

Tirmek - I say we go trash all shadow's temples and alters and such.

Sarah - Does that weaken deities in Eberron?

Tirmek - I dunno, but no matter what I do making out at this point seems innapropriate.

Sarah - Damn your right, so egging temples it is.
----------------------------------------

Shadow - I sense a disturbance in the farce, as if many cultists screamed out in terror, only to be tp'ed.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-23-07, 03:36 PM		There is a way, but only Charles has any inkling of what it is. :evillaugh

:blink: I'm enjoying this too much, aren't I?
Forest Kobold High Priest: No, no, just enough. :schemes:
Shadow - I sense a disturbance in the farce, as if many cultists screamed out in terror, only to be tp'ed.
13: I may not be allowed to help, but I'm allowed to have fun at the expense of one side. :devil:

Bunny: That's how I've always done it.

13: I thought you'd gotten angelicized again.

Bunny: Then OORei died.

OORei: I'm okay.

That blast from the Becoming God that shot of into space suddenly slams into OORei.

Bunny: Nobody gets better on my watch.
urial angel of death

02-23-07, 03:43 PM		Volrath made his way down into the inner sanctum of the black dragon king.

Dragon: How did you get down here!

Volrath: The people of Sharn were marvelously helpful.

Dragon: What do you plan to do? You cannot kill me!

Volrath: Not directly. Damning darkness

All of the room’s magical lights are dispelled by Volrath’s magic

Dragon: Ha! Any being of evil can see through this darkness. You have only mildly inconvenienced me.

Volrath: If you have no fear now; then the dragons have obviously devolved farther than I had thought. I purpose of light was not to see, but ward off the grues!

Draconic screams are heard in a darkness that the camera cannot see through.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-23-07, 05:30 PM		lastly the Headmaster as he styles himself, is mine. I’ve looked forwards to this for ten years. Any questions?”

Naz'roth: I have a few questions, first are the gaurds telepathically linked? second, do the message centers send an automatic message when shut down, Third, what limits are you putting on us magic wise?
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-23-07, 05:39 PM		I purpose of light was not to see, but wad off the grues!
OOC: Okay, I need to know what grues are in this situation, since the kind I know are probably very different.
Paulon

02-23-07, 06:08 PM		OOC: Grues are a monster from the Zork series of adventure games. Their appearance is AFAIK (having never completed any of the games or played more than the original trilogy) unspecified but generally assumed to be hideous, and I generally assume somewhat reptilian. They are lurkers in darkness, unable to stand any light at all. They are also carnivorous, and consider anything stupid enough to be in total darkness to be a meal.

In the early Zork games you have one move's warning to do something about being in total darkness before they eat you alive. "You are in the dark. You are likely to be eaten by a grue." The usual move is to 'turn on lantern' or to move into light, though I understand there is also grue repellant in Zork II.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-23-07, 06:52 PM		OOC: Wow, is the true situation really that hard to see?

Now I know what everyone else feels like when they have to beat me over the head repeatedly to get the point across...

And the Dragons are all across Khorvaire, not just Sharn.

IC:

Shadow: :devil: Why, thank you, son of Nyarlathotep.

Volrath: You're too late. He's gone.

Shadow: Not quite. These fools sought to make what I'm doing an impossibility by being unable to die by just any hand.

Beneath the throng of grues, the Black Dragon King roars back to life, preparing to eliminate the invaders of his domain.

Except, of course, for the mass of shadowmatter sticking out his throat. Having your windpipe, esophagus, and spine severed in one shot tends to put a damper on all movement.

Volrath: Oh, come ON!

Shadow: *eyes Volrath hungrily* Despite only needing to kill the Children of Syberis, I'm not against other...shall we say...morsels that come my way. Normally I'd leave one like yourself alive, but you are too close to play your role properly.

Volrath: I am not your food, what in Xoriat do you mean by that, and get the hell out of my niece!

Shadow: Says you, wouldn't you like to know, and try me, whelp.

Shadow raised his (her?) hand, gleefully preparing to feast on Volrath's soul and remove one more obstacle. A darkness deeper than the one already present envelopes the battlefield, and even Volrath can see nothing at all. He does, however, feel the Shadow's power grow as he prepares to strike. Just as he moves to flee, the power source is disrupted and Volrath is thrown back by the feedback pulse. His vision returns and the Shadow is gone, now one Councellor more powerful.

Volrath: Ooooooookay...
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

02-23-07, 06:53 PM		Naz'roth: I have a few questions, first are the gaurds telepathically linked? second, do the message centers send an automatic message when shut down, Third, what limits are you putting on us magic wise?

Chanse "Officers, about one in five guards have amulets taht permit them to comunicate with each other, but there chage powered and use iz avoided where possible. Mesage centres dont give a sighn when shut down, as for magic, carte blanche but trember the more extravagant magics will have colateral damage, and this is a rescue mission." (Will probibly post the strike in the next day or two, but Im on GMT so moast of the stuff on this thread happens while I'm asleep / studying)
Kaizer_Ryu

02-23-07, 09:15 PM		*still in the test of will*

Shadow: I must say, I am quite impressed. Even I was unaware that fools like you existed. *tears Lilly limb from limb*

Lilly: *regenerates* Funny, I was about to say the same to you. *stabs him in the face*

-----

Elina: W...what is this place?

S.D. Queen: Check the Dungeon Map you got from your Obsessive Compulsive part.

Elina: "The Field of Ruin". The place the Shadow defeated the remains of my resistance. Together, we would have won...

S.D. Queen: Indeed. He has been planning this for years. He did the same thing to Terra. You get your stubborn streak from her. It was due to Lisa's effect that she was able to prevent this.

Elina: I failed where Mom did not.

S.D. Queen: Hardly, child. He is a god, and does not like to lose to a mortal. He learned and prepared deeper barbs in the event you rejected him as well. But you have something he cannot control and will not break on your side.

Lust Elina: And he's bishie! :drool:

Elina: :blush: Uh...yeah.

Lust Elina: If I rejoin you, will you FINALLY snog him? :bigeyes:

Elina: :bored: You've been talking to Silver, haven't you?

Lust Elina: Sensei knows all kinds of amazing things!

Elina: :nonono: *sigh* I'll see what I can do.

Lust Elina: Yay!

The two clasp hands, and Lust Elina disappears in a flash of light that surrounds Elina as the two recombine.

Elina: Do you know how many more I have to go?

S.D. Queen: *sigh* RPG nerd Elina.

Elina: Oh, right! The Status Screen! ...crap! I still need to get the Boss Key, the Compass, and I haven't fought the Sub-Boss yet. ...wait just a damn minute... *stares at OOKaizer* :bored: Why am I not surprised?

OOKaizer: :shifty: What?
rampant

02-23-07, 09:25 PM		Elina scampers away trying to track downthe shattered fragments of her mind.

Silver D. Queen - Good luck young one, *turns* and now for you.

Shadow - How did you!

Sarah (disembodied) - You can't hide from me here fool.

Silver D. Queen - You underestimate her family.

Shadow - Where is that wolf brat hiding!

Tirmek - (disembodied) Oh honestly did you think we wouldn't try to help her? You're almost as lame as Lily.

Silver D. Queen - Burn!

Shadow - Are you going to taunt me to death?

Tirmek - Let's find out you glorified ink blot.

Sarah - Your father was a hamtaro, and your mother smelled of elderberries!
---------------------------------------------------------

Hyrd - Hyrd know wings not there, but now they hurt. Hyrd not understand.

Ivy - It will be allright Hyrd, I'm right here.

Hyrd - *nuzzle*
Kaizer_Ryu

02-23-07, 10:00 PM		The Shadow forces Sarah and Tirmek to take visible shapes.

Tirmek: Damnit! I was afraid that might happen...

Shadow: Fools! I am lord of this domain now. Though I must say this saves me the trouble of killing you in the real world.

Sarah: :bored: Lemme guess. You're about to say something on the order of "Your minds now exist here. When you die here by my hand, you die for real." Close enough?

Shadow: :tantrum: Don't steal the villain's monologue! Now, you *points at the Silver Dragon Queen*, destroy them. I have more pressing matters to attend to.

S.D. Queen: No.

Shadow: You would dare defy me? I own you!

S.D. Queen: You no longer command me. I may be unable to fight back, but I refuse to bow to you!

Shadow: ...no matter. Elina's little escape attempt will be cut short soon enough. This is still my realm, and you are just as powerless to stop me as you were in reality!

With an outstreched hand, the Shadow sends a wave of arcane energy at Tirmek, but the boy deflects it with only some difficulty.

Shadow: *incredulous* Impossible...

Tirmek: Lilly's little stunt gave me an idea. You may be a god, but here you cannot divide yourself without diluting your power as Terra does. You are trapped in a neverending battle of will with Lilly, that's half your power. He may be an idiot and undeniably Spoony, but he's stubborn when he wants to be. I have to give him at least that. You are also fighting the remaining Dragon Chancellors, avoiding their detection as well as their troops. And now you're fighting us in here. You cannot command your slaves within the prison, so that leaves you with, what...only about one and a half times the strength Elina normally possesses?

Sarah: You've spread yourself too thin. Not only is pain new to you, but you've never had to fight someone actually able to harm you. Planning is one thing, but you let the mortals you use do the strategic fighting. Throwing your weight around like last time just isn't going to cut it. :P

-----

Inner Child Elina: More tea? :bigeyes:

Elina: (i.h.h.: How much longer is this gonna take?! :weep: ) Of course!
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-23-07, 10:13 PM		Inner Child Elina: More tea? :bigeyes:

Elina: (i.h.h.: How much longer is this gonna take?! :weep: ) Of course!
13: And a very merry unbirthday to you too, woohoo!

Elina: Okay, e makes sense in that roll, but…(points to the March Hare)…why aren't you Bunny?

Silver: Do you know what a march hare means?

Elina: :blink:……………:nonono: It all makes sense now. Also, I've figured out where Bunny must be.
***********
Bunny (leading a charge of sharpened playing cards and Monstrous Demon Flamingoes against the Shadow): Off with his head!
ratslinky

02-23-07, 10:35 PM		*The Shadow appears in an out of the way urban park the Copper dragon king is sitting on a bench in the form of a black woman*

Copper Dragon King: Would you like a cookie Shadow?

The Shadow: Huh?

C.D King: I said would you like a cookie

C.D Duke: * In the form of an Asian martial artist* We must go

C.D King: Oh dear it seems like every time we meet I don't have anything good to say to you *She and the Asian dude walk through a door and disappear*

The Shadow: The Hell?

Gaz Prime: *In a black business suit* Hello Mr. Magicson it's been a while

The Shadow: You how are you here

Gaz Prime: It's simple really after you killed me I new what I had to do I had to go back to Dolurrh. I knew it was what I should do and yet I did not and now Mr. Magicson I have no purpose. What is purpose Mr. Magicson I'll tell you purpose is what finds us

Gaz 2: Purpose is what defines us

Gaz 3: Purpose Mr. Magicson is what we have come to take away from you

Gaz Prime: *Stabs his hand into the Shadow and some deeper shadow moves up it gets to his neck and is forced down* :shocked: *The Shadow then slams Gaz Prime away and the rest of the Gaz's who number about twenty charge at The Shadow*

*The Shadow spins around makes time stand still then hits 5 Gaz's and the-*

Dramadar: Due to excessive drama this scene has been cut

*Cuts back in at the end of the fight with the Gaz's knocked back and The Shadow flying out*

The part of Shadow that fought the Gaz's: :twitch: :twitch: :twitch: thematrixreloadedissogoodI'mgonnaspendal lmytimecreatingaroleplayinggameaboutitan dthenI'm gonnaplayitandthenI'mgonnawritfanfiction andthenI'matrix

The rest of the Shadow: Mayday mayday The part of Shadow that fought the Gaz's is going loony shut it down shut it down! *The part of Shadow that fought the Gaz's is locked away and so is it's power*
Kaizer_Ryu

02-23-07, 11:08 PM		*several viewings of Matrix Reloaded later*

Formerly locked away part of Shadow: Dear ME that movie was bad!

Rest of Shadow: Damn right.

-----

Copper Dragon King: You see, that's where you're wrong. Chuck Norris cannot be beaten unless there are so many factors against him that it requires a Plot Device to not seem fixed.

Copper Dragon Duke: With all due respect, sir, that's a bunch of crap and you know it.

C.D. King: Look at the record. Chuck Norris has only lost to two people. One was the Deicide, but he came from a world without magic and feats, and it still took several hits to take him down.

C.D. Duke: What about the other one?

C.D. King: Bruce Lee. And that was only because Chuck was the Bad Guy and Bruce was the Good Guy, Asian, and a Martial Arts Master.

C.D. Duke: Is that why you list your Metamagic spells as 'Chuck Norrised'?

C.D. King: You know it.

Chuck Norris: I am Chuck Norris.

C.D. King: :D SQUEEEEEE!!!! :D

*ROUNDHOUSE KICK TO THE FACE*

*Copper Dragon King dies*

C.D. Duke: HOLY :censored: !

*GLARE*

*Copper Dragon Duke explodes*

Shadow: *dropping Chuck Norris disguise* :devil: That worked even better than expected.

*Copper Dragons continue blabbing endlessly about Chuck Norris in his head*

Shadow: Shut up, both of you!

OOC: For more info on the awesomeness that is Chuck Norris, check this (http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/) out.
rampant

02-23-07, 11:32 PM		Tirmek - One final thing Shadow *tirmek gestures and shadow is thrown into the dirt* You have no Idea how to really fight here. You are in a psionic mind now, and we are both your psionic superiors. We will tear you apart.

Sarah - (leaps into Tirmek and out Shadows ribcage, the hard way) Literally punk.

Shadow - *regenerating* (i.h.h. what was that!)

Tirmek - Fear fool, i can smell it, you finally understand that you could lose. Let me tell you something, you will not be permitted to escape. No matter where you hide,

Sarah - No matter who you try to manipulate,

Tirmek - We will beat you,

Sarah - And when we do,

Tirmek and Sarah - We will seal you in a place so vile, so twisted, so abhorrant, Kanatash will pity you!
ratslinky

02-24-07, 12:21 AM		Gaz Prime: D:censored: I was hoping he would think it was a good movie for a bit longer oh well activate the contingency

Gaz 5: Yes sir *Focuses for a second* it's done

The part of the Shadow that was formerly locked away: Dear ME that movie was bad! Time to turn it off *presses his remote control to turn it off. It doesn't. He presses it again. Doesn't work again he tries it a couple more time before giving up and getting up to go out of the room or at least tries to he finds his body it paralyzed and his eyes forced to the screen. The rest of the Shadow is fight when they here a scream of pure agony.

The rest of the Shadow: What was that?

*Back in the television room The part of the Shadow that was formerly locked away is being forced to watch the Matrix Reloaded for the thousandth time*

The part of the Shadow that was formerly locked away: Dear god make it stop I want my mommy
Kaizer_Ryu

02-24-07, 01:23 AM		What Gaz believes to be part of the Shadow begins convulsing, then resumes its true form.

White Dragon Duchess: :weep: It burns... :weep:

-----

Tirmek finds himself unable to breathe. Not due to choking, but his mind seems unable to send the command.

Shadow: Psionic superiors? I know all my host does. I know your moves, your weaknesses. I may be rusty in strategy, but she is not.

Sarah engages him, trying to break his focus, but when he said he knew weaknesses, he meant it.

Sarah: *being held by the back of her neck* :gel:

Shadow: Still haven't gotten over it? Your sister would be disappointed.

*SMASH*

Sarah: Suck fire, b*tch! *Flame Strike*

Tirmek: *gasp*

Sarah: *Lightning Smash*

Shadow: Time Stop

Sarah and Tirmek freeze in place as the Shadow shakes off Sarah's blows. They were tenacious, but they were in his world. The laws of the land bent to his will, and they would not take it from him. He had to finish this soon and finish what he started with Elina. Though...perhaps he had enough time to enjoy this after all.

Shadow: *staring Sarah in the face* You know, cub, your mother learned this from me.

The time freeze still in effect, he savored the sight as he shoved a shadow spike through Sarah's ribcage. It poked out her back after piercing a lung, the blood staining her clothes. He then turned towards Tirmek, launching a second spike and piercing his right hand. The bodies may have been mere projections, but the pain was quite real.

Shadow: Next. Power Word Blind

Sarah's sight leaves her.

Shadow: I wonder exactly how much damage it would do if I were to cast, say... Polar Ray?

A paralyzing cold engulfs them. Fortunately, it does less than he hopes as the effects of the Time Stop fade.

OOC: The Shadow is still a grave threat. He isn't "one hit and you die" hard, but Elina is still his to draw from in both power and experience. Sarah and Tirmek have their work cut out for them.

-----

Elina: Ok, Compass from my long-winded Professor self that looked a lot like Tirmek, check. Boss Key from my Hulk self that looked entirely too much like Sarah, check. Special item from my Keyblade Master self that looked suspiciously like Riku, check. ... *sigh* do you have any original ideas for personality fragments?

OOKaizer: :mad: It's after midnight, I'm tired, and they're one time jokes. Cut me some slack for not giving them much thought.

Elina: :rolleyes: Lazy.

Revenge Elina: You shall go no further! One such as yourself has no place commanding me and leading us to ruin once more! You will bow before me so that I may destroy those who would do us harm unhindered by your bleeding heart.

Elina: YES! The Mid-Boss!

Revenge Elina: :uh-huh: Uh...actually I prefer the name Dark Adonis...

Elina: Bah! You won't show up after this, so what good is remembering your name? Mid-Boss is good enough for you.

Dark Adonis: :shock:

OOC: Please tell me someone else gets this reference. :bigeyes:
Paulon

02-24-07, 01:34 AM		OOC: Please tell me someone else gets this reference. :bigeyes:

Not having a PS2, I didn't recognise it. Though I did find out what the reference was from Wikipedia, I'm not sure if that counts.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-24-07, 01:49 AM		Assuming you're right, the secret award will go to either someone who knows it without having to look or you for showing a concerted effort. :)

Though the PS2 comment makes it pretty likely you've got it.
rampant

02-24-07, 02:34 AM		Tirmek - And I learned this from my little cousin Teiza! *Silhouette*

The shadow is frozen While Tirmek rips into his Raging mongoose manuever with hammer and a conjured greatsword with Sarah mauling the shadows neck.

The freeze fades

Shadow - How did you-

Tirmek - Know what you said? Return the affect? Elina never faught Teiza except when Terra needed her to demonstrate something. The little scamp has all sorts of tricks you maybe god of shadow, but be warned Teiza is probably its most dangerous user. Too bad I can only use the powers she's developed. Some of those mysteries are just plain twisted.
-------------------------------------

Teiza - Sit!

Umbral Tarrasque - whimper *sits*
---------------------------------------------

Using the shadow's distraction Sarah has the dupe flanked. The two begin a rapid series of comboinations Using hold and stun manuevers to keep the Dark god from attacking.

Sarah - You know what this is?

Shadow - The Archeron flurry, you're trying to limit my movements.

Tirmek - *shifting into an offensive stance, and channeling both of his weapons into a blast of green and black* No we're trying to kill you.

Black and green energy bites into the manifestation of the Shadow. Pain and agony dance accross its features, portions of its body are ripped open and tiny black motes stream into the air dissolving into nothingness.

Shadow - ...:eek:

Tirmek - Yes, you understand you have already lost. Even if you manage to evade us, you've lost forever that overwhelming confidence. You know that strike would have killed you if it had been my aunt. You know that mortals have the knowledge to destroy such as you.

Shadow - I am part of this world I die, so does it.

Tirmek - No, you misunderstand your own nature. The Power that binds shadow to this world must exist. The intelligence attached to it is ... Expendable :evillaugh:
-----------------------
Warning below this point is no longer cannon
--------------------------

Shadow - ... CUT!

Sarah - What now! Your water two millimeters to the left?

Shadow - Yes, but that's not the point.

OORampant - *wearing a directors cap over his mewtwo suit, and carrying a bullhorn* What is it now?

Shadow - How come he gets an evil laugh? I'm the freaking villian?

OORampant - Because he's darker than you.

Shadow - Excuse me isn't that a little racist?

OORampant - Don't give me that! His character is darker.

Shadow - He's a fracking good incarnate!

OORampant - He's also has a twisted and deranged mind that would drive anyone but Kanatash and Caralot over the edge. As it is they just skim for ideas for their ... Ahem ... Bedtime activities.

Shadow - .... I know I shouldn't ask, but what could they learn from him?

OORampant - He's the only other girl on board with the same, ... special options as Caralot.

Shadow - But she's not, you know, doing anything like that... Is he?

OORampant - Name one 13 year old who doesn't fantisize.

Tirmek - :embarrass

Sarah - Are you fantisizng about me?

Tirmek - ... There's no safe way to answer that.... unless. *shifts to girl* What about you who are you fantasizing about sweety:D

Sarah - :embarrass
ratslinky

02-24-07, 03:28 AM		Gaz Prime: Actually his mind isn't that bad I had a look one day and I found out that the pretty pink flowers must be saved from the sultana of the dead
Kaizer_Ryu

02-24-07, 04:16 AM		Sarah: ('pathing Tirmek) What's going on? He's getting stronger, not weaker!

Tirmek: (back) He's probably absorbed more souls. With that, he's able to direct more power at us.

The next wave they throw at him turns the Shadow into a pool of the purest darkness. Tirmek cannot see the motions of the surface, but Sarah's eyes can detect the rippling currents as the next attack comes. Countless shadowmatter tentacles erupt from the pool arcing towards the pair. The sheer number makes up for the constant severing by the two, eventually ending in one or more grabbing hold.

Sarah: Let go of me, you damn pervert!

Ignoring the passing resemblance to a bad Tentacle Hentai Anime (though that may be redundant :D ), the Shadow drags Sarah into the pool as he begins stabbing Tirmek, striking numerous glancing blows as he plays with his new toy.

Tirmek: What are- *STAB* Augh! -you doing- *STAB* Gah! -to her!

-----

Sarah awakens to the smell of blood. Opening her eyes, a sight beyond her worst nightmares presents itself. All about her lay the bodies of her loved ones. Elina...Satnak...Rose...Ivy...Teiza...Ni na...all of them. And by the looks of it, their deaths were inhumanly vicious and cruel. Sarah struggled to surpress the rising panic and unbearable pain stabbing at her heart.

???: Kill...

Sarah: Who's there?!

???: Kill!

Sarah: What do you want?!

???: KILL!!!

The visage of a red and black Wyrm with wings and a woman's head and upper body appears nearby.

Fury: Thank you for the sacrifices, my Chosen. I gladdens me to know you understand the joys of bloodshed.

Sarah: What? No! I didn't-!

That's when she noticed the taste of blood in her mouth, the blood and tissue forced deep into her nails from slashing, and only the tattered remains of her own clothes, torn in the same fashion as if she had transformed.

Sarah: ...I didn't...*falls to her knees* ...I didn't...I wouldn't...I couldn't...

Fury: It was quite a sight to see! I haven't seen such a display of pure, unadulterated passion for death in millenia!

Sarah: No... No..! Nonononononononono!!!! This isn't real! This is all a dream, a hallucination! Where's Tirmek?!

Fury: Oh, yes. Too bad you missed him. He's over there if you want to finish the job.

Sarah quickly got to her feet and ran to look in the direction the Fury pointed, only to see Tirmek and Maladren passionately kissing. She was speechless for several minutes before turning away.

Sarah: It can't be...

Fury: Come now, don't tell me you're spent! Where's all that magnificent rage?! Show me that passion again! Your only purpose is to KILL!

Sarah: NO! This is a LIE! He would never do that to me, and I would never do this! GET OUT OF MY HEAD YOU SICK BASTARDS!

Fury: Yes, YES! There it is! Release your fury and shed his blood in my name!

Sarah: RRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! !!

The enraged girl shifts to Hybrid form and attacks the Fury, desperate to escape this place. Instead of striking her, though, Sarah finds herself in a pool of shadowmatter, the presence of the Shadow and the slowly fading presense of Tirmek nearby. She could hear muffled voices, and rushed towards the surface. As she shot out of the pool, she recognized the scene before her. They were still in Elina's mind fighting the Shadow, and Tirmek had managed to free all but his leg. He suffered from multiple stab wounds, but continued to fight back. However, Sarah's reapperance in her transformed state came as a great relief to him. Before the Shadow could react to her unexpected reemergence, she grabbed Tirmek from his grasp and landed outside the mass of tentacles.

Tirmek: Are you all right?!

The look of pure hate towards the Shadow was enough of an answer for him.

-----

Elina: Submit!

Dark Adonis: *pinned* Never! You may have beaten me, but I will have my reve-*SMASH*

Elina: I don't have time for this! You are not getting away and you are going to rejoin me right now! *MORE THAN REASONABLE IMPRESSION OF SATNAK'S GLARE*

Dark Adonis: :eek: ...but what will become of my beautiful visage? :(

Elina: Oh, for the love of-! WE LOOK EXACTLY THE FREAKING SAME!

Dark Adonis: Oh...well...right then...

Much like the rest, Elina's vengeful side faded in a flash of light as the same light enveloped the original, signalling their reunification. A fairy also flits about the area.

Elina: You added in a freaking FAIRY?! How lame ARE you?! :mad:

OOKaizer: What are you complaining about? It's free healing!

Elina: *grabs the fairy* So help me... *sigh* This had better be worth it. *Chomps the fairy in half* ... :blink:

OOKaizer: Taste's like chicken, doesn't it?

Elina: ...disturbingly similar, yes.
Charles Phipps

02-24-07, 07:11 AM		Lilly: Must...continue....fighting.

Shadow: Fool! I almost have you!

Lilly: Ha...ha....ha....ha....ha....

Shadow: What's so funny?

Lilly: I'm sorry, it's just you still haven't gotten it.

*Lilly is swallowed by an anaconda as it crushes bones before being spit out*

*Lilly stabs the Shadow three times with his blade*

Shadow: And what's that?

Lilly: You need to break me in order to win.

Shadow: Yes.

Lilly: That means the terror of the pain must overwhelm my own feelings for Elina.

Shadow: Easily.

Lilly: Ha Ha ha!

Shadow: WHAT!?

Lilly: I'm immune to fear :censored:! You'll be here forever!

Shadow: :eek:
Charles Phipps

02-24-07, 07:28 AM		Rose's Cafe in Xen'drick

Blue Dragon King: Our last best hope is here.

Aerith: Hello Rose.

Rose: Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine!

*Doog Junior plays As Time Goes Bye....abyssmally...on the piano*

Blue Dragon King: We need your help.

Rose: I stick my neck out for nobody.

Aerith: The entire world may be in Peril.

Rose: She tried everything to get them, and nothing worked. She did her best to convince me that she was still in love with me, but that was all over long ago. For your sake, she pretended it wasn't, and I let her pretend.

Aerith: Rose, please stop ripping off Casablanca.

Rose: Oh fine! I'm through with being a Captain though. I did my part in this war. I offed a Dragon king.

Blue Dragon King: Mistakes were made in this war. We tried to control all of humanity's destiny but that was to prevent another Demon War and keep Khyber imprisoned. The destruction that came from previous civilizations blinded us to the realization how fundamentally cruel it was to your people.

Rose: Which you say only now because you're losing.

Aerith: Please Rose.

Rose: NO!

Aerith: How can you sleep at night.

Rose: I count sheep. Then randomly Sarah starts chasing them and barking before doing Stupid Sarah Tricks. Then I fall asleep.

Aerith: You dream that?

Rose: No, I started a farm and Sarah attacks my sheep.

Blue Dragon King: As the Chosen of the Traveller, you have the power to help stop the Shadow and Khyber.

Rose: And what's in it for me?

Blue Dragon King: Zella didn't sacrifice her essence to kill an Ascendent Counsellor. She can be brought back.

Rose: I'm in.
Charles Phipps

02-24-07, 07:31 AM		*after defeating a small army of Mycanoid Mushroom people, Turtle Monsters, and jumping across a horde of platforms...*

*She comes to a gigantic Castle where she does battle with a Dragon before slaying it*

Loyal Retainer: I'm sorry Elina but your Princess self is in another Castle.

Elina: OH YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!

***

Shadow: I'm getting very irritated by all these lunatics...

*cheezy music starts to play*

Chuck Norris Jarlot: There's our foe!

Pink Ranger Aerith: We must pull our six magic medallions out!

Pirate Jarlot: To get rum?

Ninja Jaela: TO FORM...BECOMING GOD!

Shadow: Oh.....Hell.

*Six Lion robots form together into a single figure that the Shadow just stands there a it takes three minutes to assemble*

Becoming God: I SUBSIST ON THE COMMERCIALIZATION OF CHILDREN'S TELEVISION! MY FUEL IS A MESSAGE OF PEACE AND BROTHERHOOD ACCOMPANIED BY POINTLESS MARTIAL ARTS VIOLENCE!

Shadow: I'm leaving now.....

Becoming God: Random punches until the final attack is to used to kill him in one blow!
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-24-07, 08:34 AM		Becoming God: Where's my agent? I was told I was going to have a serious role in this thread.

OOcat: Unfortunately your mecha essence means you have to take on these parts in order to maintain your Awsome power should another giant monster form of Khyber or some such appear.

Becoming God: At least he got the hypocracy right.

OOcat: Which is why I like 8-bit so much.
***********
Bunny: There is a way to kill Chuck Norris. I just haven't used it because he's so good at what I do.
Charles Phipps

02-24-07, 09:06 AM		Becoming God: *Blows up a half dozen dragons*

Ivy: Aren't the Dragons good now?

Becoming God: Oh no, these aren't dragons but SHADOW DIMENSIONALS from the NEGATRONITY-Verse.

Ivy: The what in the who now?

Becoming God: They're robots and, as such, it's fine to destroy them.

Ivy: Uh...huh. We can just kill them despite the message of peace.

Becoming God: Oh no, we don't use the word Kill.

Ivy: ?

Becoming God: No one dies in my conflicts with the bad guys despite the fact I may pick up a building and beat a man with it. All of the cities destroyed have been safely evacuated. See, all the parachutes or voice overs that say everyone got out of the tanks in time?

Ivy: So the bad guys don't actually cause any deaths?

Becoming God: Oh Heaven's no, they just inflict tremendous amounts of property damage. Even things like taking away all sunlight in the world or turning off all the worlds power at once doesn't cause any fatalities.

Ivy: Wow, that's kinda wimpy.

Becoming God: Unless, it's the BECOMING GOD MOVIE.

Ivy: What happens then?

Becoming God: Then suddenly, robots start dying left and right from energy blasts. Also, I tragically die in a battle with Unbecoming God. Then I pass along the Tetranowhamy Ball of PeaceTM to the next line of toy's leader in Hot God.

Ivy: That's cheezy.

Becoming God: Don't worry, I eventually come back in an all new and remodeled metallic toy for Beast Wars Becoming God. Twenty years later, all the fans will also be nostaglic for me but unfortunately they'll only make a cheezy anime influenced cartoon version of me with Pokemon.

Ivy: Woah.

Becoming God: The LIVE ACTION film will be directed by Jerry Bruckheimer.

Ivy: I liked you better when you were a pirate.

Becoming God: Hold on, I have to stop the Shadow's minion Dumb Plotting FlunkyTM from stealing all the world's Love into his crystal thingy before he escapes and leaves a robot for me to fight.

*psychotic violence ensues*

After Episode

*two kids that look suspiciously like Ivy and Lilly*

Lilly: Hey! Look at these cans marked gas in Dad's Garage!

Ivy: Yeah! Let's douse ourselves in them!

Lilly: And go play with matches so we can be the Human Torch Brothers!

*Becoming God pops out of their father's corvette back seat*

Becoming God: No kids, setting yourself on fire is bad.

Ivy: Thanks Becoming God! We never would have figured that out before!

Lilly: Why are you in our garage?

Becoming God: I'm having sex with your mother in the backseat.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-24-07, 10:07 AM		Becoming God: AAAARRRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!! No amount of power is worth this humiliation! Okay, NOW I'm calling my agent.

OOcat: Dude, we realized that no one wants to be your agent.

Becoming God: Huh? Why?

OOcat: Because your agent gets 10% of everything. And that includes humiliation.

OOC: :rofl: Charles. Though like any comic actor the Becoming God will eventually want some serious roles so that he can show people he's got more skills than just being stupid.

Then he'll want to direct.
Charles Phipps

02-24-07, 10:11 AM		OOC: Despite the fact he's Jarlot's ghost, Becoming God is now increasingly like Sideshow Bob in my mind.

;-)

BECOMING GOD: DEFENDER OF THE UNIVERSE

Lawful Stupid Soul Fused Warforged Juggeranut Fighter 30/Epic Anime Mecha 10

The Becoming God was created by the Generic Powers of GoodTM at the dawn of time to be the one true CHAMPION OF JUSTICEEEEEEEEEEE (note, that is actually how its spelled). Instead of actively deploying this awesomely powerful creation, they promptly buried it on the planet Eberron where countless world destroying catastrophes were ignored by it.

The Becoming God was eventually infused with the soul of the late Captain Jarlot, which at last animated its awesome mystical power. Oddly, the resulting creation is very strongly reminescent of bad Sarlonan Sentai Shows. This is due to racial memory of the Becoming God's coolness.

All warforged secretly aspire to become like him and his awesome niftiness. House Cannith under Baron Ketler has since merchandised the hell out of him. This in addition to importing badly dubbed Sarlonan Animation about his adventures.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-24-07, 11:55 AM		Becoming God: Nooooooo! How...how could this have happened?! My powers have failed me! I'M OUT OF MOVES!

Shadow: Muahahahahahahahahaha!!!

Dragons: *chanting* Served! Served! Served! Served! Served! Served! Ser-

*HORRIBLE MASSACRE*

Shadow: *picks up his jam box* Go back to dance class, boy.

-----

*at the secret-yet-routinely-found-by-the-badguys-then-promptly-lost-again underground base of the Becoming God in the Mournlands*

Announcer: *on the ENORMOUS screen TV* In other news, the Becoming God got totally served. *embarrasing footage of said serving*

Becoming God: :sulk:

-----

Elina: *checking the Status Screen* Ok, that was the last of the Poorly Locked Treasure Chests, so I have to be nearing the end of this. Let's see, I've found...oh come ON! Only half of them?! I've been searching everywhere! Where are the rest of my pieces?!

Aline: You are not the only one trying to become whole...

Elina exits the screen and sees the embodiment of her desires standing nearby. Her armor is a deep blue form fitting suit with a strange symbol emblazoned on the front, and she holds a sword shaped like an outstretched bat wing.

Elina: Dammit! Is ANYTHING here original?!

OOKaizer: What? Dark Riku is COOL!

Elina: *GROAN* So that's why I got this from the me that looked like Riku? *Keybade appears in her hand*

Aline: That is the key to our mind. It's full potential can only be wielded when we are whole and our will is strong. *points the sword at Elina* This is our test of will. One of us will walk away, the other will be consigned to being only an aspect of a larger whole.

Elina: But that's what you are, isn't it? I've accepted my feelings! You should be happy to join me!

Aline: You'd think that, yes. But I've had a taste of existance. I find I like it.

Announcer: The EPIC battle for Elina's mind will continue after a word from our sponsor.

Are you looking for an affordable place to take the family that doesn't involve creepy cartoons and cheezy gimmicks to entice the kids? Looking for a restaurant with delicious, mouthwatering recipies that won't break the budget? Need more EXP? Do you have a complete and total disregard for your own safety when it comes to saving money on food?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, then come to Dragonmeat Den!

This week, we're holding our first ever special on pre-killed meat! Due to recent events, a glut of Dragon Meat has come into our possession. For the next week (14 days), everything on our "Lazy Cowards" menu is 50% off.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-24-07, 12:11 PM		Becoming God: Nooooooo! How...how could this have happened?! My powers have failed me! I'M OUT OF MOVES!
…………………………
Announcer: *on the ENORMOUS screen TV* In other news, the Becoming God got totally served. *embarrasing footage of said serving*

Becoming God: :sulk:
Becoming God: I guess this means I have to have a soul-searching episode to restore my confidence. Unfortunately that means I have to let my pilot out to go ham it up with his sweetheart or get told an old story of heroism about his dead relative that inspired him to become a mech pilot. And since he's too young for a sweetheart………

The glow of the Becoming God's eyes fades. There is a hiss from the chest, sme steam that is only for show, and it splits open to reveal a pilot's seat in the middle of a bunch of readout screens, piloting controls, and switches that never seem to be used and probably control the MP3 player. In the pilot's seat, in a skin-tight multicolored spandex outfit, sits Schroedigger.

Schroedigger: Not only am I a mech-pilot, but I'm a bishonen catboy.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-24-07, 12:29 PM		Momo: *in a mechanics outfit* How many times do I have to tell you to watch yourself out there! He may be a god, but all this maintenance is killing me!

Shroedigger: I can't just ignore the rules of engagement. Those fancy poses that serve no purpose are tricky!

Momo: I can't believe you got served! I work day and night to ensure he's functioning in the best possible way, and you get served the very first time?!

Shroedigger: That only means I have to do some angsty scenes followed by a montage of training or something similar before I return more skilled than ever.

Momo: And more bishie! :cloud9:

Shroedigger: You're too young for that!

Momo: Awwwww....
Charles Phipps

02-24-07, 12:55 PM		OOC: Bravo, both of you.

I'm in :cloud9: fanboyish glee.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-24-07, 01:02 PM		OOC: I think we need to start listing ages on the Wiki, simply because I can't tell too well what Momo looks like about now.
Charles Phipps

02-24-07, 01:07 PM		OOC:

Isn't it Lilly and Tirmek are 14, Ivy is 13, Elina and Sarah are 12?
Crystalforged

02-24-07, 01:19 PM		Ignoring the passing resemblance to a bad Tentacle Hentai Anime (though that may be redundant :D ), the Shadow drags Sarah into the pool as he begins stabbing Tirmek, striking numerous glancing blows as he plays with his new toy.
:ahem: Hey, now! I would think by this point we have enough taste to make in GOOD Tentacle Hentai Anime. Don't cheepen us like that.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-24-07, 01:29 PM		OOC: Sarah and Elina are 14/15-ish, Momo, Scias, Nina, and Deis are 4/5-ish. Mentally older due to Outsider blood.

And the bad guy can't possibly make a GOOD Tentacle Hentai Anime. There's too much gloating and foiling of the good guy's plans as he attempts to get it on with the hero's girlfriend/wife/random hot chick he just met and/or slept with/sympathetic cute girl he's aiding/etc...

Though the former exploits of a certain pair made for some pretty kick-ass material. ;)
urial angel of death

02-24-07, 01:31 PM		OOC: There is only one good tentacle hentai. It was made by Chucl Norris.

Also just so you know Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.

IC: Unnoticed behind the Shadow stand two small figures.

Lenneth: So let me get this straight, when you cast magic onto my sword, it takes away my MP!

Myrr: Sorry, doesn't make sense to me either.
rampant

02-24-07, 01:39 PM		Tirmek - 13/14 ish mentally a tad older due to being a nerd.

Tirmek - *holding a roll of tape* Stupid shadow breaking my glasses.

Teiza, Corre - 7ish

Dorvos - 9ish

Hyrd - same as ivy
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-24-07, 01:52 PM		Shroedigger: You're too young for that!

Momo: Awwwww....
Schroedigger: Also I am of the dense-headed variety of bishonen, meaning it will take severl episodes of you being mad at me for reasons I can't understand for me to finally get a slight inkling that you like me.……

13: And maybe several embarrassing "hints". :devil:

Silver: At the rate this thread moves you'll both be old enough to date by the time that happens. :rolleyes:

Schroedigger: ……Yet apparently this does in no way hinder my piloting skills, and actually seems to make me much better than any opponents who are much more mentally mature than me and who possess more actual skill.

Momo: Swoon. :love:

Bunny: Takes after Elina, does she? :bored:
************
OOC: Lady is then likely reaching 10 by now.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-24-07, 03:11 PM		(Will probibly post the strike in the next day or two, but Im on GMT so moast of the stuff on this thread happens while I'm asleep / studying)

This should be intresting...
also I know how you feel there. Living in england does have it's down sides.

Sithis is about 204 years old. which in human terms would be about 15.

I applogise in advance for the ridiculous length of this post. i got more than abit carried away while writing it.
IC:
Sithis watched as a room formed about him. it was circular, and made of obsidian. square black pillars formed of the rock stood at equal points. and beyond them lay a void of stars. in the centre of the room stood a familiar figure, Sa'vor. His feature's where younger. but built up around him was a feel of awsome power. he wore merely a black set of trousers and no shoes.
across his alabaster skin could be seen the dark tattoo's and runes. hanging from his neck was a black Ankh with stylised drop of blood on it.

Sithis glanced down at his clothing, to find rather no the regular noblemans clothes but simple loose black robes. the only weapon he possessed was his staff, and the crackling power of the elementals contained within it.

Sithis: what is this place?

Sa'vor: its a place beyond worlds, a place of spirits.

Sithis: I thought you cant interfere in the world?

Sa'vor: Khyber and the Shadow have broken the rules. which means i can break them too... in this occasion.

Sithis:... this is about what's happening to Elina isnt it?

Sa'vor: exactly. We cant allow the Shadow to act through her, gods have their chosen yes. but he has gone too far in his petty revenge.

Sithis: what must i do?

Sa'vor: *sighs* i was hoping to wait a few years until i had to do this. but unfortunatly the situation warrents it.

Sithis: what?

Sa'vor blurred as his fist drove into Sithis's stomach. Sithis was knocked from his feet, and lay sprawled on the ground a few feet a way. Sithis rose to his feet shocked.
Sa'vor's movements blurred again, Sithis attempted to parry but was struck once more. this time he managed to stay on his feet. Sithis lifted his staff to attack but had it knocked from his hands.

Sa'vor: No items. just you and your magic.

Without seeming to move Sa'vor appeared at the other end of the room. Sithis took his chance, Drawing on his power he unleashed a fireball spell. The fireball exploded around Sa'vor, but the flames themselves never touched him. they hovered a few inches away from his flesh as if stopped by a solid substance. Sa'vor raised a hand, the runes on his body glowing and the flames where devoured.

Sa'vor: Good. your spell control is deffinatly got better.

Sa'vor made an arcane gesture and a bolt of energy lashed out from his fingers. striking Sithis in the chest, Sithis grit his teeth as pain like thousands of white hot knives seared through his soul. Raising a hand he muttered a few arcane sylables. the pain ceased.
Sithis smiled and unleashed a hail of eldritch blasts. each bolt of energy slambed into an impenitrable barrier about an inch before striking Sa'vor. the runes along his flesh glowed with a fell light.

Sa'vor smiled, the rune above his eyebrow glowing. and unleashed a metorite swarm. Sithis raised a shield of energy just in time, and grit his teeth as the energy rippled with each strike. about Sa'vor a flock of shimmering dagger shapped bolts formed, crackling with raw magical power.

He sent them at Sithis, each one smashing into the shield with more power than the last. Sithis held his concentration against the onslaught, but with each strike he felt it wavering. Until a sheer wave of power struck. crumpling his sheild like a sand castle beneath a Tunsunami. Sithis felt pain sear through him as he was cast to the floor.

and watched as Sa'vor stood over him, his eyes cold and emotionless.

Sa'vor: And here i thought i'd found the heir to my domain. but your like the others. weak. powerless.

Sa'vor turned his back and strode away.

Sithis felt the anger rising unbidden within him, it filled him. setting his mind ablaze with power. burning white hot in his veins. setting a coflguaration of power beneath his skin. Sithis rose to his feet, his eyes becoming pits of fire.
He raised a hand, and unleashed an Eldritch blast coupled with a fireball.
The normal energy became searing flames as it struck Sa'vor, breaking through the wards on his chest and knocking him flat on his face.

Sa'vor rose, power crackling from his fingers as he devoured the magic from the flames.

Sa'vor: (ihh) Yes. he's done it. he's tapped Hellfire. (Out loud) Well do-

He was cut off by another burst of hellfire striking him in the chest. Sithis rose above him, flames dancing across his skin... and froze as Sa'vor hit him with a Hold Monster spell.

Sa'vor: That, was completely unneccesary.

Sithis: err... what?

Sa'vor: Dont you get it?

Sithis: Not really. you just attacked me.

Sa'vor: *sigh* This whole dream is a test. by defeating the wards engraved in my skin you've proven your worthy of what comes next.

Sithis:.. and that is?

Sa'vor: *irritated* you dont think the tattoo's and runes are actually tattooed do you?

Sithis: well... most usually are

Sa'vor: They appear on those of my bloodline, much like dragonmarks. they help us control and channel our magic. You've already got one *gesture's to the symbol burnt in his palm* a now, you gain the Mark that proves unlocks the rest of your abilities. as well as allowing you to feed.

Sithis: *shock* what? you've been restricting my ability to drink blood?

Sa'vor: The concentual blood drinking is basically similar to the wards on Elina or Sarah. it makes sure that you learn to control yourself until you're strong willed enough to be able to controll your ability to feed.

Sithis: Okay. i understand. *pause* .. now what?

Sa'vor: This is going to hurt like hell.

raises his hand there's a flash of red and indiscribable amougnt of pain burns through Sithis.

Sithis awakes and the pain subsides. he's lying on one of the bedrolls set up by the troops occupying sharn. Rising, Sithis could feel somthing cold and mettalic pressing against the skin on his chest. Sithis ran a hand down to the shape of somthing. he raised it to his view, revealling the black Ankh that Sa'vor had been wearing...

Sithis let the ankh drop back around his neck and ran a hand over a patch of pain above his right eyebrow. tracing the black length of a rune. Sithis rose, grabbing his staff and donning his armour. he then let the familiar weight of his black leather duster drop about his shoulders. It was time to pay a visit to The Shadow...
Kaizer_Ryu

02-24-07, 03:13 PM		OOC: The Shadow isn't acting out of any kind of revenge. There is something much deeper going on. Naz'roth almost played right into their hands.

Yes, I meant their hands.

But great scene with Sithis, Kale.

IC:

The world around them shifts to a platform amidst total darkness. The platform itself glows slightly as the two square off.

Aline: Don't hold back. I want to crush you at full power.

Elina: This is my mind. I have been a prisoner here for far too long to just let you take it.

The sparks fly immediately. Fire meets ice, blade strikes blade, and the test of wills begins in spectacular fashion. Taking flight, the two circle, vainly searching for an opening. Each knows the other's moves, habits, and thought patterns. Skill was literally dead even. Only resolve would carry the day.

Aline breaks the deadlock with a Call Lightning shuriken, which Elina deflects and counters with a Flame Strike, followed by several Shadow Lightning arrows. Aline counters the first with Ice Storm, but the water that results conducts and amplifies the lightning, giving Aline a rather nasty shock. The opening is a feint. As Elina closes in, Aline activates the Snare she had prepared. Momentarily caught, Elina cannot block the flaming Mindblade that pierces her armor and embeds itself in her stomach. The move, however allows her to free herself. Before the blade dissipates, she grabs hold of it, pulls it from her body, and sends a feedback pulse straight into Aline's mind.

Aline: *grabbing her head* GAH!

Elina: Big mistake. You and I are the same, so I know your mind's pathways like my own.

The blade finally disperses, but Aline is sent to the ground face first. She quickly rolls out of the way as Elina comes down for the followup strike, righting herself and catching Elina in a whip of ice.

Aline: And I know you as well. We share tactics, reaction times, and abilities. Against anyone but yourself, that may have worked. Too bad.

Aline flung Elina high into the air, coming in hard against her back. She then grabed Elina's arm and threw her to the side, setting up a shadow barrier just in front of the unfortunate girl. The impact led not to a satisfying crack, but Elina dissipating into a rain of shadowmatter. The beads surrounded Aline, each seeming to move with a mind of it's own.

Aline: What? No, that's not possible! You shouldn't be able to do that while still fragmented!

Elina: *from each bead* It seems my will is stronger, then.

Each bead forms a spike and passes through Aline, shredding her armor as well as her resistance.

Aline: H-how...?

As she fell, she saw the platform. On the surface, visible only from this height, was a mural. Elina at the center, with pictures of all those close to her heart surrounding it. Her siblings, her parents, her friends, all connected and giving her strength.

Aline: *smiling as she closes her eyes* I see...

Still falling, Aline turned to face Elina as the shadowmatter reformed. She reached out her hand, offering peaceful reunification. Elina swooped down, accepting her hand as the two hung in mid air. The now familiar white glow signalled Aline and all the fragments she had gathered returning to their place within Elina's soul.

Aline: You make a good 'other'...

OOC: Yes, yes, I know. I completely ripped off Kingdom Hearts II for that last part, but I just really loved that scene. I'll do more to wrap up the battle for Elina's mind later.

But maybe not. There's a major ice storm moving through and a distinct possibility that we'll lose power because of it. Hopefully not, but if I disappear for a while, that's why.
rampant

02-24-07, 03:52 PM		Sithis - I should have opened with a spellwoven blast agianst the far wall to bounce a hell-rime lightning bolt. Ah well I'll save it for my next match with Tirmek.
-------------------------------------

Tirmek - My ears are burning.
------------------------------------

Kithle - Popcorn?

Norbaz - No way the last time you where giving out popcorn you'd mix itch powder into the salt. That was one disturbing week.
-----------------------------------
Flash back

Micheal - mgffhififhnbjfbuiwfuhffe (must get arm into mouth, must scratch esophgaus)
------------------------------

Tirmek - hehehehehe

Shadow - whats so funny, or has the stress finally knocked you off your rocker.

Tirmek - Oh no I had my psychotic break this morning.

Silver D. Queen - 3 straight hours of "no one listens to me", "whats the point of being a tactical genius if everyone rushes off without me", blah blah on and on and on.

Shadow - I want you to shut up.

Silver D. Queen - And I want a Pony. We don't always get what we want.

Shadow - You incessant nag!

Silver D. Queen - (in a really high pitched voice) I'm the shaodw and I'm so great. I can make little girls cry, then possess them and make them get all emo.

Shadow - Disrespectful Liza-Gekeuh

Sarah is currently burrowing into the shadow lower intestine.

Tirmek conserving his few remaining power points has used call fish for a nice sharp marlin, and call dinnerware for a spork. THe spork is currently being used to gouge out shadow's eye while the marlin is tail slapping the deity.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-24-07, 04:00 PM		Tirmek conserving his few remaining power points has used call fish for a nice sharp marlin, and call dinnerware for a spork. THe spork is currently being used to gouge out shadow's eye while the marlin is tail slapping the deity.
Forest Kobold High Priest: No, NO! More drama, MORE DRAMA! :tantrum: The works of the E.B.N.E. Phipps bleed off too much, we need more!
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-24-07, 04:10 PM		Yes, I meant their hands.


Thier? now thats more than a little worrying.
I feel my shoulder tingling...
urial angel of death

02-24-07, 04:16 PM		Lenneth: Screw it!

She pulls out her buster sword, and runs up Shadow's back, hacking all the way. Unfortunately she is unable to pierce his damage reduction.

Lenneth:How much DR does he even have?!

Myrr: Scan. 50/slashing or good

Lenneth: Then why am I not hurting him?

Myrr: Sis, that sword is dull as a butterknife.

Lenneth: Then how did Cloud kill all those monsters with it?

Myrr: It was really heavy. Read his character sheet. *hands it to her*

Lenneth: :mad: Bludgeoning! Graaaaaaaa Limit Break!

*insert really long animation sequence here*

Damage counter: 3

Myrr: *finishing his popcorn* Well that did nothing.

Lenneth: That's FF7 for you; lots of flash and no meaning.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-24-07, 04:52 PM		OOKaizer: :weep:

*outside the room*

OOUrial: What's he doing?

OORei: You made fun of FFVII.

OOUrial: And?

OORei: Remember the last time?

OOUrial: ...he's watching Aerith's death scene over and over again while crying, isn't he? :bored:

OORei: Yep.
rampant

02-24-07, 04:54 PM		Elina - :bored: Yeah this isn't going to work. *Smacks OOKaizer upside the head with Star Seeker* Get back to work you lazy bum!
--------------------------

OORampant - :zzz:

Teiza - *glare*

OORampant - ?huh? :eek: I wasn't sleeping just resting my eyes!
DragoonDarkfire

02-24-07, 06:27 PM		(in a room not too far away)

Marik: I have done it. I have created a portal to Xoriat, the realm of madness.

Optamis Prime: Is that where the energon is?

Marik: First of all, your a warforged. NOT an autobot. Second of all, there IS no megatron. STOP ASKING!
_____________________

(at that moment in the Mournland)

Lord of Blades: FOOLS! They do not know of my true identity. And that fool prime has yet to even put two and two together. That the supposed "Lord of Blades" is in fact. MEGATRON!

_______________________

Buckrill: So what's so special about Xoriat?

Marik: it is a realm of MADNESS! if we can channel even a tiny portion of that energy we could create ANYTHING!

Buckrill: like a swimming pool?

Marik: why are you always going on about how this place needs a swimming pool?

Buckrill: I'm a shifter.

Marik: What kind of Lycanthropey do you come from?

Buckrill: platypus.

Yethara'kti: I didn't know those kinds of Lycanthrope existed.

Buckrill: Well it's more along the lines of- "My mother was a duck shifter and my father was a beaver shifter".

Marik: lovely.
________________________

(shows Marik, Optamis, Buckrill and Yethara'kti standing together)

Marik: allow me to introduce myself. I am Marik, a former mercenary of house Denieth who got expelled due to some bad luck.

Buckrill: didn't you like... stab the patriarch in the eye with a knife?

Marik: Don't push it. I'm a master thrower.

Buckrill: then how come every time you throw something it goes flying backwards?

Marik: that's just cause I payed some good coinage to add the returning effect to my weapons.

Buckrill: what weapons?

Marik: Boomerangs mostly.

Yethara'kti: ...

Buckrill: you're an idiot.

Marik: as you can see, these are my friends Buckrill, the shifter platypus who is a Dirge Singer.

Yethara'kti: His voice can bring destruction and ruin? How?

Marik: he yoddles.

Yethara'kti: EEK!

Marik: this is Yethara'kti, our kalashtar psion who likes to dress up as our resident maid and do WHATEVER we say.

Yethara'kti: no I don't...

(Marik pulls out a remote control, an antenna sprouts from Yethara'kti's head and her eyes gloss over)

Marik: as I was saying. She is our servant and maid and will do whatever we say right Yethara'kti?

Yethara'kti: yes master.

Marik: good. And this is Optimus Prime.

Optimus Prime: TRANSFORM!... TRAAAAAANSFOOORM!... **** TRANSFORM ALREADY!

Marik: he thinks he's the leader of a group of warforged aliens that are meant to save the world from the Lord of Blades... or as he calls him "Megatron"

Oprimus Prime: I AM! I must stop MEGATRON!

Marik: sure ya do... sure ya do...
__________________

(shows Marik in front of a huge gate)

Marik: with this gate. I'm going to enter into Xoriat and make my way to it's HEART. There I will find the center of all madness and with it I shall conquer ALL OF EBERRON!

(thunder and lightning)

Marik: either that or shove it in her Majesty of Aundair trite royal a**.

Optimus: You're going to find the matrix?

Marik: What are you Optimus prime or Neo?

Optimus: your lack of knowledge in Transformers does not amuse me so. But if it is a weapon that can stop Megatron then I will gladly assist.

Marik: awesome. Buckrill what about you?

Buckrill: what are you NUTS!?

Marik: Well I AM going into the realm of madness.

Buckrill: I'm not going there NO WAY NO HOW!

Marik: Platypuses are beings of madness (I mean they're a freaking duck/beaver/mammal/egg layer... thing) I'm sure you'll find one in there...

Buckrill: ... fine I'm in.

Marik: what about you Yethara'kti?

Yethara'kti: NO WAY! SCREW YOU I'M NOT GOING TO GET-

(Marik pulls out remote control and an antenna grows on her head, her eyes gloss over)

Marik: now are you ready?

Yethara'kti: Yes master.

Marik: good... but bring a school girl uniform to distract the tentacle monsters.

(the portal opens up and the four brave adventuress's walk in... to find a green grassy field full of beautiful naked women and furries)

Buckrill: this is the realm of madness?

Marik: call it what you like. I CALL IT HEAVEN!

(Marik runs over to a girl and puts a hand on her shoulder)

Marik: hey baby. What say we go back to my place and get down?

(the girl turns around to reveal a mustached fat man covered in hair)

Manwoman: sure thing sweetheart.

Marik: AH!

(Marik pulls his hand away and the man woman becomes a normal hot girl again, he puts his hand on her shoulder and she changes back)

Buckrill: apparently all the hot women here transform into men when you touch them... weird but I don't see how it can drive a man insan-

Marik: ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHH!!!!

(Marik falls into fetal position)

Buckrill: ah. Well that shows me how much I know.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-24-07, 06:44 PM		OOC: Welcome to the insanity. Or is it the crazyness? You should be aware that there is a "rule" in effect saying that the Lord of Blades is not Megatron. Of course, rule #2 on the FF is that rules are made to be broken……………with as much force as possible.

[Rule, noun, FF usage: Something someone makes up to insert a pop-culture reference while simultaniously saying no one is allowed to make said pop-culture reference.]
DragoonDarkfire

02-24-07, 06:58 PM		OCC: Then the rule will have to be revised obviously.
Charles Phipps

02-24-07, 07:04 PM		Becoming God: The autobots think they're so damn cool. Ooooo, look at me I can become a VEHICLE! The same thing for Voltron. Ooooo, look at me, I can become a bunch of kitties! HA! Screw them all! I have my own superpowers! I can become...errr...Ketler, what can I become?

Ketler: You can become Five Tree Sloths.

Becoming God: I can become a....what now?

Ketler: The Adolescent Angry Pirate Tree Sloths from Venus fell through on a toy deal, so we had to salvage the thousands of Sloth molds we made somehow.

Becoming God:....I hate you all.
rampant

02-24-07, 07:51 PM		Becoming God:....I hate you all.

Kithle - That's our Jarlot:D

Becoming God - Oh not you anything but this.

Kithle - You realize of course that you still can't drink.

Becoming god - I should have just stayed dead.
Charles Phipps

02-24-07, 08:04 PM		OOC: Welcome new player to our game!

101 Things that the Becoming God is forbidden from Doing

1. You will not recruit five teenagers with attitude to...

2. Serve as your personal slaves while you battle evil.

3. Target practice.

4. Food for your Five Seperate Lion parts.

5. Drive insane with the non-euclidean nature of my controls.

6. If I do recruit five teenagers to be my pilot then....

7. They shall actually have attitude as opposed to be the whitest bread kids on the planet.

8. Undergo boot camp that trains them to be ruthless instruments of death than acrobatic quasi-martial artists.

9. Be ready to actually use the super attack FIRST that needlessly hitting things in a pointless gesture.

10. They shall be all eye candy that will eventually be legal for my harem.

11. The Becoming God will not turn into a Taxi, get passengers, then turn back into a robot to kill them horribly.

12. Then charge the fare to their surviving next of kid.

13. I don't care if its funny!

14. You will not consider nuclear power plants to be "All you Can Eat Buffets."

15. Nor is the Nation's Oil Reserve a Coffee bar.

16. Defending the Universe from Evil does not give you a right to do whatever the Hell you like.

17. You will not use that title to pick up chicks.

18. Yes, I know that like Voltron, the more chicks you hook up...the better it gets.

19. You're a robot! What do you need with chicks!?

20. Alright, that's just sick man!

21. The way of peace, love, and Becoming God is not to blow the :censored: out of a hundred giant monsters.

22. .....well, I don't know what IS if its not that but it's not that.

23. The Unbecoming God is not to be taunted because you become a Semi-Truck and he becomes a Gun.

24. ....especially not with the Nelson Laugh.

25. You're a robot, why would there be female robots!

26. You do not have a empty hole in your chest for holding the Matrix of Leadership.

27. And if you did, it would be wrong to store CDs there.....

28. OR PORNOGRAPHY!

29. Thundercats are not the other white meat.

30. I will not kill them and the populous of non-giant robot shows for no reason...

31. "Thinning the herd" of 80s children's television doesn't count as a reason!

32. I will not sell real blazing swords of flame to children.

33. Nor will I deliberately always engage the enemy in populated areas.

34. No, I don't know why they always attack Sharn and not any other city.

35. You are not a Metal Gear.

36. So stop having paranoid dreams about Solid Snake blowing you up.

37. It is wrong to call any Gundam pilot who comes by you a complete wuss.

38. Eva pilots thank you when you insult them.

39. Jaela is not allowed to be your pilot.

40. Ketler should not try to fulfill his sexual fantasies by doing that.

41. It's also very Freud for a daughter to pilot her father.

42. Being 50 feet tall does not make me a natural date for the 50 foot woman.

43. I will not call Godzilla a p*ssy.

44. King Kong I can after that stupid movie.

45. I will not use a giant machine gun just so I can have shell casings crush cars beneath me.

46. I will not crush planets just so the announcers will have to come up with a reason to say no one died.

47. In the Japanese non-dubbed version of Forgotten Freedom, everything is not serious and sensible.

48. In the American dubbed version, we are not replacing Sarah with a character who just barks than speaks.

49. ...Despite that being an improvement.

50. No, I will not speculate on Transformer sex.

51. Yes, we know Megatron and Starscream are lovers.

52. That's not speculation, that's fact.

53. No I don't know why all aliens are humanlike and want to invade us.

54. Nor why they keep sending giant monsters than just attacking militarily.

55. Princess Aerith is not the secret key holder of the Five Golden Sloths that form you.
rampant

02-24-07, 08:15 PM		Becoming God - You really take all the fun out of this gig.

OOPhips - Kithle.

Kithle - Your pain amuses us.

Becoming god - Whats wrong with him?

OOPhips - You mean why is my dignity still intact?

Becoming God - Since when have you had that?

Kithle - The bill is in the mail.

Becoming God - Hold on I havee-mail. HEY!!!

OOphips - Ok what about me?

Kithle - Hold this please. (holds up a sign)

OOPhips - uh sure

Kithle - *yoink*
---------------------------

The sign reads in invisible ink: Its me kithle using my shapeshift spell.
-----------------------------------------------------------------

Becoming god - (and his auto see invisibility affect) CRUSH MAIM KILL!
----------------------------------------------------

13 - What was on the bill?

Kithle - 5 bottles of 20 year old whiskey.

13 - :D
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-24-07, 09:21 PM		25. You're a robot, why would there be female robots!
Silver: :D
30. I will not kill them and the populous of non-giant robot shows for no reason...
Bunny: …………………………:confused: There needs to be a reason?
31. "Thinning the herd" of 80s children's television doesn't count as a reason!
Bunny: But thinning a herd is a very important part of the balance of nature.

*crickets chirp as the audience waits for a punchline*

Bunny: :bored: What? I'm being serious.
41. It's also very Freud for a daughter to pilot her father.
Schroedigger: Did you have to make that innuendo?
50. No, I will not speculate on Transformer sex.
Silver: :D
51. Yes, we know Megatron and Starscream are lovers.
Magatron from Caralot's universe: It's not true! I'm a playah! Really! I banged a buncha babes just last night!
52. That's not speculation, that's fact.
Megatron: NO!

Merrix: Quit your whining. It's not like your arch-nemesis wears crotch-revealing tights each time he comes to fight you.
DragoonDarkfire

02-24-07, 10:46 PM		Day 1- Xoriat, the outer rim.

Marik: alright. The outer rim of Xoriat.

(shows a collection of tentacles and other objects in more then one dimension)

Buckrill: Ya know. Being on other dimensions at the same time while I view abominations of the worst kind is making me thirsty.

Marik: I'll get the water.

(Marik pulls out the canteen of water and opens up the cap to find the water spewing out and becoming huge leeches in front of their eyes as they move to a hideously deformed face and begin to eat it)

Marik: don't see that every day.

Optamis: Perhaps we are inside Unicron.

Buckrill: Unicron is a planet not another freaking plane of existence.

Optamis: shut up.

(after a few hours of walking they come to a daelkyr sitting behind a wooden desk with the sign "Psychiatrist" next to it)

Marik: wow. This is ironic.

Daelkyr: Can I help you?

Marik: please explain how a daelkyr can be a psychiatrist.

Daelkyr: well sit down and I'll see what I can do.

(Marik sits down in a randomly spawned bed/chair thing)

Marik: this will be good.

(a few hours later)

Marik: AND THEN MY UNCLE WOULD DRESS ME IN A PINK DRESS AND BLOND WIG AND MY FATHER WOULD SPANK ME FOR NO REASON! THEY ALWAYS WANTED A LITTLE GIRL!

Buckrill:...

Optamis:...

Yethara'kti: master. I must obey master.

Daelkyr: hmmm... Mr. Marik. I do say that you suffer from some chronic family issues. You need to discuss this with your father and your uncle. You need to confront them head on and have them realize what they did has made you an emotionally scared adult.

Marik: thanks doc... I guess you did good.

Daelkyr: thanks. That'll be one hundred billion platinum piece.

Marik: WHAT THAT PRICE IS-

Daelkyr: INSANE!? AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

______________________________________

(Back in Sharn we see a mind flayer appear in town with a bunch of Doulgaunt cronies running around him)

Mind Flayer: AHA! Soon the city of Sharn will be mine and I will conquer all of Eberron.

(A group of five warriors wearing different colored armor jump out in front of him)

Red Sloth: NOT SO FAST FLAYDARIS!

Flaydaris: SLOTH RANGERS! NOT AGAIN!

Red Sloth: QUICK! Lets GO!!

(a gun in the shape of a Sloth appears in each of their hands)

Red Sloth: ready... ATTACK!

Flaydaris: NOOO!!!

(Flaydaris is struck in the front and for some mysterious reason begins to fall back but explodes in a fiery explosion before he hits the ground)

All the Sloth Rangers at one: YEA!!!

(for some unknown reason Flaydaris comes back 50 ft tall)

All the Sloth Rangers: *GASP*

Black Sloth Ranger: What do we do about that?

Red Sloth ranger: no option.

(he holds up a stone and speaks into it)

Red Sloth: BECOMING GOD! We need your help.

Becoming god: How do these guys keep growing 50ft tall anyway? I mean if they're going to grow 50ft tall anyway then why just summon me to start?

Red Sloth: Look can you just get us the damn Sloths already?

Becoming god: FINE!

(5 sloths appear from the corners of the earth and they each go inside one)

Red Sloth: FORM FEAT AND LEGS! FORM ARMS AND TORSO! AND I'LL FORM THE HEAD!

(it does so)

Red Sloth: Becoming god GO!

(an epic, bad Godzilla like rubber outfit battle takes place with Flaydaris eventually exploding... again)

Every Sloth ranger: YEA!!! WE DID IT! WE'RE AWESOME!

(Shows a Female Daelkyr on one of the moons looking down at it)

Daelkyr: AWWW I THINK I'M GONNA HAVE A HEADACHE!

Grell: get some ****ing aspirin. God.
DungeonJman

02-24-07, 10:50 PM		Ok, i don't know if i'm supposed to announce this, but i sort of have to leave the FF, due to extreme usage of my time over at the guild of paladins, its been fun, but i've pretty much run out of ideas and i have relatively serious things to worry about, but before i leave:

*creates a glass box which reads *USE IN CASE OF EMERGENCY* with a little hammer on the side*

Nobby: Well, this war is an emergency!

*breaks the glass and a dire weasel comes out and latches onto his face*

Nobby: *while running around in a circle* AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!
rampant

02-24-07, 11:44 PM		Shadow - I get the feeling they don't take me seriously.

Tirmek - E.B.N.E.s have notoriously short attencion spans.

Shadow - Are seriously coming at me with a spork?

Tirmek - Are you seriously stopping to have this conversation while Sarah is chomping on your gall bladder?
Charles Phipps

02-24-07, 11:46 PM		Farewell DungeonJman. I loved your stuff in this thread.
Paulon

02-25-07, 12:04 AM		To DungeonJman: Good luck, enjoy yourself, and don't let yourself be tricked into losing your Paladinhood again. :P

To the Shadow: Do you really want more EBNEs to pay attention to humiliating you? I can pitch a character in if you like...
luna18moon

02-25-07, 12:23 AM		OOC: I'll miss your contributions to this thread, DungeonJman.
IC:
Slaypaw and her family are eating bacon.
Brea: :blink: ...Why are you eating bacon in the middle of a war?
Mittens: :nonono: It's MAGEBRED DIRE BOAR bacon. We took it from some dragons we killed.
Brea: :uh-huh: ...Shouldn't we be fighting?
Slaypaw: :confused: Why? Elina and the second generation ubers will take care of it.
Brea: :blink: I fail to see the justification.
Slaypaw: We could always eat the bacon out of their country. :shifty: Or, of course, we could eat them.
Brea::looloo::nonono: I guess I'll settle for that.
Crystalforged

02-25-07, 12:25 AM		Kanatash appears in front of Flaydaris and his cronies with his arms crossed and a disaproving look on his face.

Flaydaris: (gasp) Lord Kanatash I-

Kanatash: How many times are we going to have to go over this Flaydaris? What have I told you?

Flaydaris: (reciting while hanging his head) Paitience is a virtue.

Kanatash: That's right. You know as well as anyone that the council has decided to give this reality a few more eons to come to maturity before we unmake it. That means no invasions. We're taking our time here. Because? (pauses)

Flaydaris: (reciting again) Because any reality worth unmaking is worth unmaking right.

Kanatash: Correct again. Now to your punishment. Hmmmm, I think a few decades in the gulag should set you straight.

Flaydaris: :eek: No! Anything but that!

Kanatash: Yes, I think Deranged Lord Gulag's Happy, Fun World Camp with be just right for you. There you will be forced day after day to follow perfectly normal, enjoyable persuits while being fed regulary form rich and pleasent fair while resting atop the most comfortable matresses know to any reality.

Flaydaris: :weep: Please I be you, do not show me such mercy! Any other punishment, I beg you!

Kanatash: I think you'll have plenty of time to think about your transgressions. (snaps his fingers)

Flaydaris: (sucked int a happy cheery void) NOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooo

OOCrystalforged: (watching Flaydaris being sucked into a fate worse than death) So are you going to do anything about that Female Daelkyr on the moon.

Kanatash: Naw, trapped on the moon, surrounded by incompetent underlings, doomed to eternally fail to a couple of idiodic teenagers? I think thats covered already.
ratslinky

02-25-07, 01:48 AM		See ya DungeonJman I'll miss your jokes
Crystalforged

02-25-07, 02:14 AM		Yep, seeya DungeonJman, best of luck with that paladin guild.


In other of news I just happened to sit down tonight and write fill out a wiki entry for Kitten.

http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Kitten

Its a little tossed together so suggestions for anything I missed are welcome, particularly from Silver.
rampant

02-25-07, 02:40 AM		OOC: Don't let her fall asleep around Hyrd. She might get mistaken for a stray plushie. She'd end up on the workshop bench getting a mouth stitched on.
-------------------------------------------------------------------

Mickey - Allright kid nothing permanent, just try not to jostle them for a month or so, and soak them in some of this everynight.

Hyrd - Stuff smell like Jarlot Ghost.

Mickey - That's because its rum laced with stinkweed.

Ivy - Will he fly again?

Mickey - I dunno, his wings will probably grow, might not do it right though. I'm too wasted to care.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-25-07, 08:13 AM		OOC: Wiki's fine Crystal. In fact, back to the plotline:
IC:
Bruce: Okay, people, the Villain League just made it's demands to the leaders of the world. (reads off a printout) They're threatening to unleash a swarm of super-locusts to eat the world's crops if the reins of power aren't handed over. I don't need to tell you what would happen then.

Kitten: World hunger.

Puck: Actually locusts are good eating. What would really happen is that the world would be forced to eat real food rather than processed junk.

Kitten: And that's a bad thing because………?

Puck: If everyone starts buying real ingredients than there's less for the true chiefs like me and mom.

Kitten: So you're doing this because it benefits you, not the rest of the world?

Puck: Pffft. The rest of the world could use a wakeup call or two. They're just lucky I covet my tools.

Bruce: Yes, Kitten, it's true we have alterior motives for what we do. But there is also the reason that we are servants of the people—

Kitten: *sigh of relief*

Bruce: —and the people say they are not willing to follow anyone who hasn't killed to get where they are or tricked them into thinking that they are a good person. Or both.

Kitten: :blink:
DragoonDarkfire

02-25-07, 11:21 AM		Day 2- Xoriat, X'carvatilaoislyfavotissseraldis. The city of the daelkyr

(we see Marik, Buckrill, Optamis and Yethara'kti standing outside a city that is composed of thousands of different materials and composed in an architecture of madness)

Marik: Right. Buckrill, go down in there and find out what you can about this city.

Buckrill: you want me- ME. To go into a city full of corrupting and dangerous outsiders who will want nothing more then to kill me or put me under HIDEOUS experiments all for some information?

Marik: yup.

Buckrill: fine. Be right back.

(Buckrill leaves)

Optamis: what about the woman? She'll do whatever you'll say right?

Marik: yea but I have an appointment in my tent for her.

(Buckrill returns two hours later to see Optamis watching off to the side)

Buckrill: hey prime. Where's Marik and the Kalashtar?

Optamis: Over there

(he points)

Optamis: apparently he's trying to pin Yethara'kti to the ground, those two have been wrestling for hours now and I-

Buckrill: STOP DOING THAT AND GET OVER HERE!

(Marik walks over with a towel around his waist and Yethara'kti has a towel over her chest)

Marik: what'd you find out.

Buckrill: daelkyr do not like yoddleing.

Marik: DUHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

_________________________________

(At this point in time I think it's appropriate to give some more information about these... ummm... these... oh whatever just listen to these bios)

Marik Denieth Fighter 7, Master thrower 3

Son to a baron of house Denieth Marik was trained as a warrior since his first years. He has served almost every force in the world in his years, from the Sarlonian government to the Order of the Emerald claw and even the Silver Flame.

He was however banished from Thrane when taking pictures of Jaela half naked and selling them to some guy named Ketler. And then he ****** on her so he got his ass kicked by the Knights of Thrane and then by Ketler.

He was then expelled from his house after a throwing mishap were he struck the house Patriarch in the eye. Soon after he joined the forgotten freedom to take more pictures of Jaela for his own Lolicon manga entitled "Silver Flames Finest". To which he sells to Ketler for unreasonable prices.

There is a mysterious truth about Marik that no one knows. While it is true that his mother was baron Terian d'Denieth his father was in fact none other then King Boranal. Apparently Terian had a thing for older men and one thing led to another, now Marik is his unknown bastard son.

Buckrill BeaverWood Bard 5, Dirge Singer 5

The Platypus line of Lycanthrope is practically unknown to Khorvaire. It was spawned in Xen'drik where it continued to flourish in the height of the the Silver Flames purge. As such it remained for the most part unknown to the people of Khorvaire.

This was until they came to Khorvaire, at first they were considered a threat by the Silver Flame but one interesting fact was discovered about them... they didn't have and teeth so they couldn't bite and as such couldn't spread the disease.

So the Flame decided to leave them alone and they bread with the humans of Khorvaire until making a new breed of shifters. Buckrill is one of them. He likes to swim and munch down on worms every now and then. He also likes to explain the biological design of the Platypus to the ignorant of Khorvaire. However it was considered a creature of madness and he was to be burned at the stake.

This was until all the people caught the Plauge for... no reason what-so-ever... COUGHKanatashCOUGH. Any who, Buckrill has taken up the song of yoddleing and it's this dangerous power that has made him both feared and avoided on the Forgotten Freedom which he joined via... his own free will... COUGHKanatashCOUGH.

Optamis Prime Warforged Fighter 10

Optamis Prime has come to Eberron to stop the lord of blades. Who he refers to as Megatron. He has fought "Megatron's" minions for a few months now and recently ventured into the Mournland to defeat the evil Decepticon for good.

Needless to say he failed miserably and was nearly destroyed until an airship appeared out of nowhere and went crashing through Construct. Eventually Megatron was thrown back by the sudden attack and Optamis boarded the ship to save his life.

There he became apart of the crew after explaining his situation. After all he was clearly crazy, right at home on the crew of the Forgotten Freedom. Optamis claims he can transform himself into a giant truck however this has not proven to be the case as every time he shouts "TRANSFORM!" he doesn't change at all.

Optamis will go to any cause if it can stop Megatron and has a stout belief in good over evil. Making him hard to bear on the mostly maddening inspired ship but a welcomes (mostly) addition none the less.

Yethara'kti Kalashtar Telepath 8, Thrallherd 2

Yethara'kti originally took up the mantle of Thrallherd to lead an army against the inspired lords of Redria. However the inspired were clever and using a psionic device altered her powers making her susceptible to her own charm powers.

When she manifest "Charm Person" she instantly becomes best friends with the first person she sees. When she manifests "Dominate Person" she does whatever people tell her to do. And what's more is that she's completely unaware of this severe flaw with her.

In truth about a thousand years ago when the temples of Adar had no idea what a Quori was they were visited by another extra planar invasion from an alternate dimension. The girls that appeared in there temple where the "Sailor Scouts" though they had no idea what that meant... in truth it was Ketler who pulled them from the space time continuum to get his hands on some supple young teenage girls but due to him rolling a 1 they ended up in Adar.

The dumb blond ended up getting possesed by an equally ditsy Quori spirit (she thought it was chocolate... don't ask) and as such she spawned an entire line of complete and utter incompetent group of Kalashtar that make blond jokes look like compliments to them.

Yethara'kti was one of these and she ended serving the dreaming dark for about twelve years of her life (due to her constantly trying to Charm or Dominate them) until she was found and taken in by the Forgotten Freedom. While there, Ketler realized how susceptible her mind was to control and as such he installed a Domination device in her skull and built a remote control to have her do everything that he says.

Eventually the remote came to Mariks hands after throwing one of his returning boomerangs and having it hook around the remote, causing it to fly back to him.

Yethara'kti, when not under any control at all, is almost as much as a cheerleader to the Forgotten Freedom as Jaela is. She's perky cheerful and constantly optimistic, which constantly gets on everyones nerves until eventually someone or something takes control of her mind and has her preform some sort of perverted or evil act. Yethara'kti to this day remains unaware of this fact.
_______________________

Marik: what else did you learn?

(an army of daelkyr appear around them, each holding a gun make of flesh)

Buckrill: we're prisoners.

Marik: .... ..... ..... ................ ****!
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-25-07, 11:33 AM		There is a mysterious truth about Marik that no one knows. While it is true that his mother was baron Terian d'Cannith his father was in fact none other then King Boranal. Apparently Terian had a thing for older men and one thing led to another, now Marik is his unknown bastard son.
King Steve: Brother!

Marik: Oh H*** no!
She's perky cheerful and constantly optimistic, which constantly gets on everyones nerves until eventually someone or something takes control of her mind and has her preform some sort of perverted or evil act.
13: I don't think we can let a mere mortal have control of such great power.

Silver: Agreed.

OOcat: Plus it's not any fun to read about the evil people do because they're under someone else's control.
DragoonDarkfire

02-25-07, 11:46 AM		OOC: Try not to use anything too real-world charged. You never know who you might offend.

fixx'd
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-25-07, 12:28 PM		fixx'd
Bunny: The Plauge. Very nasty. Good choice.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-25-07, 01:57 PM		OOC: Happy smiting to you, DungeonJman.

And welcome to the chaos, DragoonDarkfire. You poor, poor fool. I think I'm gonna like Marik. He and Michael should get along great. With Doog dead-

Doog: No one cares... :allalone:

-he needs a new best buddy. Otherwise he might become-

Saint Michael: Join me in loving and respecting all of creation or DIE INFIDEL! :fight!:

-...uptight.

Sorry for leaving everyone hanging like that, not that anyone cares. The power did end up going out just before dinner and didn't come back till after midnight. I think I went into withdrawl. I hope I didn't do anything too irrational...

OORei: *rocking in the corner* The horror...the plushy HORROR!

I'll get to the next part soon.
DragoonDarkfire

02-25-07, 02:37 PM		Day 3- daelkyr prison

(we see Marik, Optamis and Buckrill in a cell made out of tentacles and pulsating flesh)

Marik: Well I wonder why they did this.

Buckrill: they're DAELKYR!

Marik: point. Can you tell us anything else Buckrill?

Buckrill: just that the rulers of this city are an elite guard of 13 daelkyr captains.

Optamis: HEY! That Ketler guy told me about a story... or anime. Something like that. Like this.

Marik: what was it?

Optamis: We need to unlock Bankai.

Marik: ...? How do you do that?

Optamis: it involves three days of training and an intelligent sword...

Marik: right. Well if we use that portable portal to the end-time realm where a single year is a day then we could be finished in three minuets.

Buckrill: but doesn't Xoriat's time move weird anyway?

Marik: so what? Let's get making Bankai.

____________________________

How to train properly.

1: Do not use your warforged as a dummy.

2: Even if it is funny.

3: should your intelligent sword propose a quest or journey for you to unlock it's power take up the Legacy Champion prestige class and change one of it's "quests" or "journeys" to something more along the lines of "Walk forward"

4: Stop asking how to cast "Kamahamaha" that spell does not exist.

5: Neither does HADOKEN!

6: OR SHOOP DA WHOOP!

7: Training in Queen Alura's court is not the best idea.

8: Not unless you want to deal with 24/7 bi***ing.

9: You cannot "train" Jaela.

10: This goes especially for you Ketler.

11: Kanatash cannot train the physical bonds of reality so that they make an extra loud "Snap" when he disembowels them.

12: Training will not be skipped for pointless interlude. If you wanna get better you'll actually have to work.

13: This goes for Marik as well.

14: You cannot spend action points to reduce the time you train to one day.

15: Nor can you spend action points to learn a new feat instantly.

16: You CAN train your mind to not be driven insane by Xoriat.

17: Kanatash didn't figure this out soon enough however so he destroyed the only known scrolls that carry said information.

18: Training is not as good as actual experience.

19: It's just a prelude to the climatic fight scene.

20: THERE IS NO "SUPER BARD" STOP ASKING!
__________________________

(we see a Mind flayer over Yethara'kti with a puzzled expression over his face, a daelkyr walks over)

Daelkyr: What have you learned?

Mind Flayer: her mind is incredibly susceptible to compulsion effects.

Daelkyr: PERFECT! what's the problem?

Mind Flayer: Su'zan over there was the first one to try and probe her thoughts.

Su'zan: I must obey... I must obey... I must-

Mind Flayer: her mind is so... controllable that anyone who probes it ends up being put under domination effect as well.

Daelkyr: I see...

Mind flayer: whatever these people are, they're either incredibly smart and resourceful or they're so incompetent that whatever god of luck is watching them is laughing his ass off and doesn't want them to die so soon.

(at that moment in the realm of the Host)

Olladra: OH MAN! This is TOO HILARIOUS!

(back in Xoriat)

Daelkyr: do not fear. Captain Irri'zli will watch them...

(they hear an explosion from the prison quarters)

Mind Flayer: I think you might have overstepped your boundaries with these ones.

(it shows a daelkyr dressed in black and white robes over a slight beaten form of Marik)

Irri'zli: fool. How dare you think you can challenge me...

Marik: yea. I should have known not to challenge your Bankai quite yet.

Irri'zli: watch it BRAT your acting as though you made it to-

Marik: yea.

(Irri'zli's eyes widen)

Marik: I have it... now allow me to show you.

(Marik shouts BANKAI! and his boomerang becomes a huge black metal Xen'drik like boomerang that hangs off his back)

Marik: Now let's go...

to be continued...
rampant

02-25-07, 02:44 PM		Tirmek - *huff huff*

Sarah - Grrrrrrrrrrrrr

Shadow - ........ (i.h.h. Dammit, how much longer do we have to hold this pose?)

Sarah - (i.h.h. my ears itch)

Tirmek - (i.h.h. I hope mother is okay, Serene is keeping her on gaurd detail for some reason)
---------------------------------------------

Ketty stands at the entrance to the quartermaster's tent. The usual theivery has dropped 95%.

Ketty - I despise gaurd duty. Standing in the same place all the time is making my ankles ache.
-------------------------------------------

Satnak - Finally! (starts chanting) Veni veni venias/ Ne me morie facias-

Serene - Let me do the dramtic music hun.

Satnak - Awwww:(

Serene - We'll get the whips out later.

Satnak - :drool:

Serene - :rolleyes:

As the energies of the gate begin to flicker into life, a song reaches out over all who can see the great portal flaring to life.

Bridge cross the starway
Return what was sealed in a bloody yesterday

Never forget friends on the other side
Let the end of apocolypse begin its ride

Bridge cross the starway
Return what was sealed in a bloody yesterday

The time of war is ending
Let the bells ring out this new begining

Bridge cross the starway
Return what was sealed in a bloody yesterday

Ride on champions and bring this knightmare to its end
Let us have home, hearth, and peace once agaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiinn

(end song)



A massive red dragon lunges out of the portal ripping the tear in the marked area into a hole that covered the entire feild. This dragon is Larger than even the Ascendant councillors, and its scales are a deep red the color of fine wine.

Behind it a much smaller, but still quite an extraordinary specimen, green serpent slips through, followed by half a legion of strange sentients.

Forbes (the serpent) - ('Pathing) Force the invaders back to these locations, Satnak has already painted the Auras you need to target. Use non-lethal tactics, these creatures have no way to defend themselves against us. I'm marking down for every scratch.

Misperin - I hate extra credit assignments.

Gig - Then don't sleep through planar studies.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-25-07, 02:46 PM		OOC: I'm pretty sure that's the first Bleach reference we've had. Either that or I forgot (entirely possible). Have you, by chance, seen this (http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=225)?

I wonder if Volrath likes the relatives of his they're about to smite in spectacularly incompetant fashion... :D
rampant

02-25-07, 02:59 PM		Optimus - Umm where did you get that boomerang?

Marik - One of the ithillids missed it during the search.

Optimus - How? they even got the one you hid in your R-

Marik - Never speak of that!
---------------------------------

Kithle - :evillaugh:

Olladra - What's wrong with that boomerang?
---------------------------------------------------

Irri'zli - You missed

Su'zan - No he didn't.

Irri'zli - ....Where is your head?

Su'zan - Over here-re-re-re-re

The Ithillid's head is tangled in the boomerang as it returns to Marik.

Marik - Ahhhh its still alive and trying to eat my brain.

Buckrill - Poor thing's gonna starve to death.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-25-07, 03:49 PM		OOC: Ok, I've finally got a moment to get moving on this.

IC:

Shadow: Heh...hehe...ha ha ha ha!

Sarah: I think I hit him too hard.

Shadow: Oh, how little credit you give me. Have you forgotten who you are, little cub?

Sarah: What are you-?

Shadow: You. Boy. Do you have any awareness of your physical body right now?

Tirmek: Of course I d-

He stops and a look of surprise crosses his face. When the Shadow had forced them to take shape here, he had also cut off their awareness of themselves. How could he possibly have missed that? That was an amateur mistake. Luckily, Maladren and Not-Walter were keeping watch.

Sarah: Big deal.

Shadow: You need to pay attention to detail to get where I am, puppy. Or should I remind you of your place?

Sarah: You're just upset because your losing.

Shadow: Believe what you want...Chosen of the Fury.

-----

Maladren: *bleeding and carrying Tirmek's unconscious form* What the hell's going on?!

Not-Walter: *now evolved into a Xenomorph* ('pathing) Just keep running!

Sarah's body had gone crazy. After transforming into her hybrid form, she had begun attacking Maladren and Not-Walter to the point of complete disregard for her own safety. The only reason they still lived was the timely arrival of Izzy, who was now keeping the possessed Sarah at bay.

Fury: Blood, death, pain, KILL!! RRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

Izzy: Crap! *SMASH* *regenerate* Just because I can't die doesn't mean it won't hurt like hell! *CRUNCH*

-----

Sarah: YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!

Tirmek: Get back there now! You're strong enough to regain control on your own. You've got to stop her before she kills anyone!

Sarah fades from Elina's mind as she goes to kick the Fury out of her own.

Shadow: What happens in the meantime? Who knows what lengths your fellows would go to to stop her...

Tirmek: They can hold their own for a bit. Now lets go.

Shadow: :devil: If you want to risk her life, then fine. But it occurs to me your friends don't have a lot of room to maneuver. If they believe she is lost, what else can they do but take her down?

As much as it burned him, the Shadow was right. If he remained here, Sarah was at risk of being killed out of necessity. She might be able to be brought back, but that was no longer a certainty. If he went to help, he could warn them and aid in her freedom. But if he left, Elina would have an extremely difficult time ridding herself of this bastard. He could only hope she had managed to reconstruct her mind and was preparing to free herself as they spoke.

Tirmek: ...dammit! *returns to his body*

Shadow: Finally. She has gotten too far already...

-----

Elina floats above the platform, her fragments finally back in place. She should have felt whole, but there was one more thing to do. She had to get control back for the first time in years. All the manipulations, the lies, the betrayals, it would all have to be dealt with.

Dark energies swirled about the platform, coalescing into a gigantic beast. Even at her hight, it came face to face with her. Merely looking at it caused Elina's heart to pound in her chest, her palms to sweat, and her stomach to lurch.

Elina: So...you must be the manifestation of those elements I must remove. How...unbelievably convenient.

Out of the corner of her eye, Elina swore she saw a figure hidden in the shadows of the beast. When she looked, it was already gone.

OOC: Yes, a new twist. Charles and I have had this going for a while, so I can't just END it, can I? If you want to, rampant, you can show Tirmek and Izzy keeping Sarah contained, but her mind is her battle. Same goes for Elina from now on.

I hope you like my Kingdom Hearts references. Seems appropriate, especially the Darkside boss. This guy's going to be harder than that pushover, though. :D
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-25-07, 05:07 PM		As Sarah Dived for Izzy a bolt of Force struck her, knocking her from her tradjectory and causing her to fall sprawled on the ground a several feet away.

Sithis lowers the wand slightly. and the hellish runes that had glowed on its lenght lessen to merely an ember glow. The rune above Sithis's eyebrow reduces to the same glow.
Sithis looks different to what he's looked like before. he seems darker. more dangerous. and a hell of a lot me scary.

His pupils have become silver ( temporaritly) and his skin has taken on a opalescent sheen. his face athough the same seems to have taken on a more predetory cast..
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-25-07, 05:24 PM		………that spell does not exist.

5: Neither does HADOKEN!
13: Actually, that one does, but there's only one being in the whole of this thread we trust with that much destructive power.

Bunny: HADOKEN!

13: And even then we're not sure.
Fury: Blood, death, pain, KILL!! RRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
Bunny: No, NO, NO! Stop attacking people who can fight back! You'll never be able to kill them!
**********
Amidst all the chaos there is a slight rumbling to the world. But only the Dramadars notice……………
rampant

02-25-07, 05:26 PM		Tirmek - haaaah!

Maladren - My prince! You are alright?

Tirmek - Don't call me that.

Maladren - Its him.

Sarah - Raaaaah!

Tirmek - Oh Lovely I've told her a thousand time to practice her controll exercises more often. Do you know how many points Levy deducts for loss of control after 5 freaking years?

Sarah berzerked form dives at the noisy one, only to bounce off a sheild infused with azure light.

Tirmek - *yaaaaawwwwwn* Come on this all you got?

Sarah - RRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Sarah smashes the earth with a thudrous boom, a crack appears running under Tirmek.

Tirmek - Well ****!

A blade of fire erupts from the earth, Tirmek only barely getting out of the way.

Tirmek - Good thing these aren't my good robes. *prods burnt sleeve.

Izzy - isn't that a dress?

Tirmek - Huh? (looks down) Oh yeah must have shifted during the projection, tends to trigger a shapeshift, woke up with bunny ears once, and a craving raw meat.

Sarah - Sarah once more rushes the mouthy cat-boy/girl/thing/whatever this time her gauntlets vibrate with sonic energy, and her volley shatters Tirmek's sheild and a final punch to the jaw causes profuse bleeding of the lip.

Sarah - *sniff sniff* *licks the blood on her gauntlets*
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-25-07, 05:39 PM		Sithis: *sigh* i hate to do this.

Sithis drew up the power within him sending attempting to crush Sarah's will with his Voice alone

Sithis: ( Prince of Darknes vamp voice) Halt.
Charles Phipps

02-25-07, 05:58 PM		56. Becoming God does not exist solely to guard a single Princess on a single Castle on a single planet....

57. He exists to guard ALL CREATION AND ALL GOOD!

58. BE BE BE BECOMING GOODDDDDDDDDDDD!

59. Sorry, I don't know what came over me.

60. Becoming God will not fight Giant Moths in the middle of downtown Sharn.

61. Becoming God will not fight Robot Becoming God in the middle of downtown Sharn.

62. Becoming God will not fight Demogorgon or other two headed Demons in the middle of downtown Sharn.

63. Becoming God will not fight Khan Kong in the middle of downtown Sharn.

64. In Throneport either.

65. Skull Island is fine.

66. Becoming God will not star in any movies that gives Mathew Broderick Top billing.

67. Unless I get to step on him.

68. Becoming God vs. Bambi will not result in Becoming God taking a dive.

69. Even if Bambi has been hitting rough times.

70. I know, Thumper and he broke up.

71. I will not deliberately lose for long periods in a fight just so my pilots will seek out power ups for me.

72. If I am losing, it is just tacky to use the Power Ups that will automatically defeat the enemy in one blast.

73. If I do have pilots, they will not have special suits that give them super martial arts powers.

74. Why? Because teens + super powers = Bad.

75. Have you ever wondered how many people those kids probably drop kicked for no reason let alone used their laser ninja weapons on?

76. Becoming God shall not deliberately ***** out his name for merchandise....

77. Or non-deliberately.

78. With the exception of already pre-licensed products.

79. Such as Becoming God cereal.

80. Becoming God action figures.

81. Becoming God t-shirts.

82. Becoming God Land Theme Park.

83. Becoming God condoms.

84. No, I don't want to speculate on the last one.

85. Yes, I know it gives new meaning to the word "Greatest Power in the Universe."

86. ....And Power Sword of Love.

87. No, I don't think 87 was deliberate.

88. No we can't figure your team of pilots to replace them with Sailor Scouts.

89. Stop getting Ketler as your Agent!

90. No, I don't know how Becoming God is supposedly an ancient device that is nevertheless more technologically advanced than anything else.

91. Schoedigger is forbidden from designing the uniforms for the team.

92. Because he's a Horny Cat Boy.

93. And THIS is what happens when he can do it http://www.sluggy.com/daily.php?date=010727

94. No, I don't know who'd win: Becoming god or Optimus Prime.

95. Or against Godzilla.

96. Voltron would win.

97. WHAT?! He so too would!

98. No, I don't know why the enemy that sends the giant monsters never just sends six or seven at once.

99. No I don't know why they don't just mass produce Becoming God.

100. Becoming God does not run on alcohol...

101....or the blood of foreigners.

102. That's Voltron again.

103. Which is why he'd win.

104. Schroedigger is forbidden from using Becoming God to pick up chicks.

105. Especially under the auspices of "recruiting new pilots."

106. Bunny is forbidden from encouraging the pilots to use the Planet-Buster on every enemy.

107. BECAUSE IT BUSTS PLANETS!

108. Yes, The Death Star would win.

109. Unless the Becoming God hit first.

110. Enterprise versus Becoming God....err...is Kirk piloting, Pichard, or Scott Bakula?
Kaizer_Ryu

02-25-07, 06:05 PM		The command did nothing. The girl would not be stopped. A prisoner of passion driven to extremes, no amount of pain nor force of will could dissuade her from the assault. This was the Fury, and words, even a command of such force as Sithis', had no power over her.

-----

*Sarah's mindscape*

Sarah: *dodge* No reason. *flip* No sense of self-preservation. *block* No conscience. *parry* No quarter!

The Fury fought blindly, oblivious to anything but the opponent in front of her. When she saw Sarah and felt the passions contained within, she had lost it. This was a chance too good to pass up. An eternal battle between herself and her Chosen was a dream come true.

Sarah hoped to end this quickly, but being forced to think on her feet while enraged and in a fight for her life were not conducive to strategy...

-----

Elina broke free of the beasts grip, stabbing him in the eye and knocking him off balance. She wasn't sure how long she could do this. Every time they made contact, even through magic, she remembered a different moment and all the pain associated with it. Her flight across Khorvaire, the betrayal by her beloved Kitsune, Ivy's warping and subsequent death, the screaming of the damned that surrounded her at all times, her time with Yuan, her Momma's death, the destruction of her home...

But she had to move on. If she wanted to be free, she had to prevail. Destroying or denying these memories would be pointless and a disservice to those she had wronged and those who had done everything possible to help her. Easier said than done. The continued assaults by both herself and the beast were wearing her down, and the creature seemed unaffected.

She dodged again, trying desperately to find a way to bring this collosus down. The beast then roared as it's chest glowed with an errie dark light. The beam that eminated from the spot engulfed Elina in an almost unfathomable pain. The weight of everything that had transpired, the guilt of all she had done, all of it came crashing down at once. It was too much to bear, and Elina began fading into darkness...

-----

Gold Dragon King: So, I am the last...

The Shadow stood before him, still holding the lifeless carcass of one of the defenders he had slain not moments before.

Shadow: You lizards should have known better. Did you really think you could hold back the tide of darkness?

G.D. King: Whether we could or not was not the point. The point was to try. If we did nothing, it was inevitable.

Shadow: It is inevitable regardless. Even your precious Prophecy could not stem the tide, nor could it keep the horrors of Khyber sealed away forever. You should have seen that after what you had to do to the Giants.

G.D. King: While it is true that the Giants had gone too far, they did so in defense of their home.

Shadow: :devil: Yet Dal Quor will return to terrorize the world beyond dreams after your kind is exterminated.

G.D. King: The hordes of Xoriat as well. We may have been fools, but not by trying to defend this realm from abominations like yourself. It was in failing to realize the untapped potential of the so-called 'lesser' races.

Shadow: It is because of them that this has come to fruition. :evillaugh

G.D. King: But it is also because of them that all may yet be saved...

The Leader of the Acendant Councel and the Sovereign of Magic and Mayhem clashed in a melee of shadow and flame. In the end, only the Shadow, wielding Elina's still captive form, was left standing. With their leaders dead, the dragons would not last long. Achika was sure to be quite pleased...
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-25-07, 06:07 PM		61. Becoming God will not fight Robot Becoming God in the middle of downtown Sharn.
111. In reference to 61: Because Becoming God is a robot.

112. Technically.
100. Becoming God does not run on alcohol...
Becoming God/Jarlot: Says you.
********
Another rumble shook through the world………
DragoonDarkfire

02-25-07, 06:22 PM		Day 4- Xoriats deeper section.

Yethara'kti: ummm... can someone tell me what just happened?

Marik: we escaped from the daelkyr and I totally kicked ass.

Buckrill: didn't you get a mindflayer head attached to you and go running around screaming like a little girl for three hours until it fell off due to starvation?

Marik: SHUTUUUUUUUUP!

Yethara'kti: that's sounds bad. But why was I unconscious? I always seem to space out a lot for some reason.

Optamis: Maybe it has something to do with you constantly being-

(Marik clasps his hands over Optamis's mouth and whisperers into the side of his head)

Yethara'kti: constantly what?

Marik: nothing. Hey Yethhy why not cast Dominate Person on me?

Yeth: why would I do that?

Marik: because... I... feel comfortable when I'm under your control?

Yeth: wow Marik I didn't know you trusted me that much.

Buckrill: oy

Marik: now do it.

Yeth: SURE THING!

(she concentrates for a moment and then her eyes gloss over)

Marik: Don't worry. We'll get Ketler to install the domination device when we get back.

Yeth: yes master.

Buckrill: can we go already? I want to get out of here before I'm driven MORE insane.

Marik: coming.

(the four companions travel into an area of complete darkness)

Marik: it's too dark to see. We'll be coming to Xoriat's core in a day or so. Buckrill turn on a light okay?

Buckrill: whatever.

(Buckrill lights a torch to see thousands of Negoi surrounding them)

Marik: O-

Buckrill: SH-

Optamis: -IT!

Yeth: I hear and I obey...

Negoi #1: Mine?

Negoi #2: Mine?

Marik: just back away slowly and-

All Negoi around them: MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE!

(they all scream as they are swarmed)
Charles Phipps

02-25-07, 06:22 PM		Shadow: And so your pitiful little council is at last done.

Rose: You really are the dumbest of all deities aren't you?

Shadow: Do you really think that you can stop me?

Rose: Yes.

Shadow: DIE

*Rose dimension doors out of the way as the blast levels a mountain behind him*

Rose: Pathetic.

Shadow: You irritate me mortal man.

Rose: I have a riddle for you Demigod. Su Bono?

Shadow: Who profits?

Rose: Yes, who has gained the most from your little deal with Khyber?

Shadow: I have! I alone amongst the gods have achieved mortal form! I have ravaged the hated Dragons and soon will unleash the power of the Darkness onto the universe forever!

Rose: And what do you get out of that?

Shadow: What? Evil!

Rose: Because destroying all of creation is going to leave you with anything to feed on afterwards.

Shadow: SILENCE!

*Rose avoids another massive blast*

Rose: Tiamat has got you tricked real good. She wants to destroy Eberron and Siberys because she figures she'll be able to rebuild afterwards. Raise up her own society in the ashes of the darkness that she rules directly.

Shadow: A society where I am the only God other than She!

Rose: Even you have to notice that there's something distinctly wrong with that picture.

Shadow: I am no mere messanger for a greater deity! I...

Rose: Am almost spent.

Shadow: What!?

Rose: The Ascendent Councillors were DEMIGODS. You were smart enough to trick them into wasting their power enough so that you were able to beat them but defeating all the ones you did kill must have taken a tremendous amount of your power out.

Shadow: I will rebuild!

Rose: Already half of your essence is tied up in a perpetual fight against Lilly. Except, unlike you, Lilly draws his strength from the Outer Planes where the smarter gods are regenerating. Every blow he delivers in that place is striking at your psychic self and eventually he'll win.

Shadow: Idiotic!

Rose: Certainly, if you had any reserve for your power left. Except, you don't. Sarah and Tirmek may only be tying a bit of it up but you've been striking out all across Khovaire and beyond to try to damage everything. You're a shell of your former self.

Shadow: My faithful will grow at my power.

Rose: Yeah, funny about your faithful. I decided to go gather them all together in a big army because they figured you were ready to lead them. The average mortal knight and farmer with a pitchfork might not be able to do much against you but they were pretty easy to point at them.

Shadow: No....

*Rose pulls out a crystal ball that shows the majority of them being massacred at a battle near Cyre*

Shadow: I AM ONE OF THE DARK SIX!

Rose: You are replaceable. Even if you flee back to the Hidden Plane of the Abyss now then you'd just be fodder for whatever deity wants to destroy you. Oh and guess what, I figured out the whole "Rejoin with Aurreon" thing was bogus.

Shadow: *in Elina's voice* You...you...

Rose: You think that by faking one prophecy, people wouldn't figure out you could fake another?

Shadow: I have Elina!

Rose: She's all you have now. When you're driven from her and flee back into the Darkness, a Shadow Dragon awaits you on your plane. Terra is ready to restore the Balance of the Thirteen. The question is...will you have enough strength to face her?

*Rose's words caused the Shadow to start withdrawing its power back....too weak as it was*

Shadow: This won't stop me

Rose: Bardic check....cause your enemies morale to be broken.
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-25-07, 06:43 PM		The command did nothing. The girl would not be stopped. A prisoner of passion driven to extremes, no amount of pain nor force of will could dissuade her from the assault. This was the Fury, and words, even a command of such force as Sithis', had no power over her.



Sithis: Damn. I thought that would work...

Sithis raised his right hand , drawing extra power from the life force he'd consumed earlier. and unleashed his Curse of Despair invocation.
rampant

02-25-07, 06:57 PM		Tirmek - Stop trying to use mind affecting spells on a berzerk you dimrod!

Izzy - Nose blind powder!

Tirmek - *sniff sniff* what's in that stuff?

Izzy - Cinnamon mostly, plus some caffeine.

Tirmek - Well this could be very good or very bad.

Sithis - I don't like that look in her eyes.

Silver - I do!
---------------------------

Sarah - Mmmmmm Cinnamon

Fury - Mmmmmm Cinnamon

Both - TIRMEK!
Charles Phipps

02-25-07, 07:01 PM		Rose: Hey guys.

Tirmek: LOOK OUT! SARAH'S RAPID!

*Sarah leaps down at Rose*

*Rose tosses a rubber ball in her mouth*

*The Rapid Sarah tears at it, as it stretches*

*Sarah tears some more*

*The rubber keeps expanding and stretching about her*

Rose: Huh. One of Ketler's inventions actually works.

Tirmek: What is it?

Rose: Giant Chewing Gum Balls.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-25-07, 07:26 PM		Silver: I think Tirmek and Sarah are ready to take the next step in their relationship……

Tirmek: Now is not a good time. :embarrass

OOKaizer: Fourt……I'm boned. :bored:

Silver: ………marrwage.

Tirmek: Hey, hold on……you're not Silver!

13 (taking off disguise): D***. They know me too well.

OOC: This comic interlude brought to you by a generous grant from the "I don't know what the F*** I'm thinkin' over here" Foundation.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-25-07, 07:48 PM		:rofl:

And THAT is why I love this thread. Where else does one think to stop the unstoppable killing machine by giving her a piece of gum to fight with?

IC:

Fury: GRRRRAAAAAHHHH!!!!!

Tirmek: I'm not sure if she'd frustrated or having fun.

-----

Failure...

Murderer...

Liar...

Weakling...

Coward...

This and more ran through Elina's mind. The darkness threatened to strangle her as she struggled to remain conscious. Feelings of worthlessness consumed her, thoughts of despair clouded her judgement.

Give yourself to the darkness...

You belong in shadow...

Let the darkness wash over you...

Only it can end the pain...

Aline: Don't listen to them! I did not lose to you just to be consumed again!

Open your heart...

Let the darkness within consume you...

Elina: N...no...I'm not...like that...

Aline: Yes, come on! You can do this!

You have no place left but the dark...

Those of the light have abandoned you...

Aline: You're wrong!

Elina: That's...not true...! Lilly...Lilly still fights for me!

The voices begin to weaken.

He will betray you...

The darkness of your heart pains him...

Elina: That is a lie!

Elina opened her eyes. She could see that she still lay within the beam of darkness. Looking towards the creature, within it's chest she can see a door. The door to her heart...and the key to victory.

Key...?

That way leads only to dispair...

The door contains that which will destroy you...

Elina: You're wrong! I know...now more than ever... Behind the door to my heart...

Aline: Is light!

The Key to her heart appeared in her hand and a beam of light shot forth. The beast roared again, this time in pain. As the door opened, the creature began to disintegrate as light consumed it. In the final stages, Elina again noticed a presence out of the corner of her eye. This time, it stayed there. A rather familiar figure, a look of immesurable joy on her face.

Terra: Well done, my child...

The creature disinitegrates completely, and a flash of light fills the area. When it fades, Terra is gone again, and a portal stands in her place.
rampant

02-25-07, 08:01 PM		Elina - ... Kaizer is so dead for making my mindscape a giant video game reference!
---------------------------

OOKaizer - Do you have to eat popcorn while you're waiting?

13 - No

OOKaizer - You're not going to stop are you.

Bunny - Nope

OOKaizer - And you're going to stick me with the bill to clean up my own bloody corpse somehow.

Kithle - Yep
----------------------------

Tirmek - Oh bloody mol! Its getting all in her fur! Bring peanut butter!
Kaizer_Ryu

02-25-07, 08:38 PM		Elina - ... Kaizer is so dead for making my mindscape a giant video game reference!
OOKaizer: Oh, I was aware of that from the beginning.

OORei: It's true. He made me help him pick out the casket.

OOKaizer: Some sacrifices must be made for the sake of the story.

OOUrial: It just happens to be you this time.

OOKaizer: Yep. I'm that devoted.

-----

Sarah and the Fury are locked hand in hand, trying to push the other back.

Sarah: Why are you here?!

Fury: RRRRAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Sarah: You exist for combat, for the rush, for passion in all it's forms! Why are you here?!

Taking a page out of Tirmek's book, she bends her knees and leans back, throwing the Fury over her head. The Fury lands hard on her feet, turning and smiling, only bloodlust showing in her eyes.

Sarah: *leaves Berzerk mode* Won't fighting me get boring?

The Fury's...well...fury dies enough to allow clear thought.

Fury: That...is a very good point. *pouts* He's a big liar! No sugar for him!

Sarah: Uh...maybe I shouldn't ask, but who are you talking about?

Fury: Shadow promised me an endless thrill if I came here and battled you! He's probably cheating on me with that b*tch, Olladra! She always did like to play the field... *disappears*

Sarah: *regaining herself* Oooooooookay..........

Tirmek: Oh, you're back!

Sarah: Yeah...that was really weir-

Rose: Yes?

Sarah: :mad: Why the hell am I covered in gum and peanutbutter?
DragoonDarkfire

02-25-07, 08:38 PM		OCC: Just out of curiosity what time line are we on and when is it over so I can join in the next one?
rampant

02-25-07, 08:46 PM		Um we just came off "Why Elina is going to Kill Kaizer" so yeah go ahead.
----------------------------------------

Rose - Because your efriend is a pervert.

Tirmek - Sarah listen its not like that!
Charles Phipps

02-25-07, 08:49 PM		OOC: Go ahead and join.

Our current date is 10 years after the Last War I believe.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-25-07, 08:53 PM		OOC: Well, we're not quite done with that one yet. Not much longer, but there's still a few loose ends and setup for later to take care of.

If you haven't been there, the Wiki (http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Main_Page) has a lot of info on the characters. It's updated only when we get around to it, and some characters have never been updated since their creation, but it's a start. You can always PM questions about a character if need be.

I thought our last date was more like 1017 YK, but maybe not.
rampant

02-25-07, 08:57 PM		OORampant - :nonono: I'm very dissapointed Silver.

Silver - What?

OORampant - I shouldn't have to hint this much.

Silver - Huh? 13!!!

13 - :D

Silver - You've decided to target me now huh?
DragoonDarkfire

02-25-07, 09:05 PM		Day 5 - Negoi camp

(we see Marik, Buckrill and Yeth tied up by their feet and suspended in the middle of a group of tents)

Marik: well PERFECT. First we're kidnapped by daelkyr now were hog tied by... what are we hog tied by?

Buckrill: *sigh* Negoi, there a race of aberrations that want nothing more then to collect everything in existence and put it away forever. They're like dragons save they hoard EVERYTHING!

Marik: great. We're being sold like pieces of meat... well we technically ARE pieces of meat... save for Optamis but you get what I'm-

(A negoi walks over and smacks Marik across the face)

Buckrill: thank you.

Negoi: your welcome.

(Negoi walks away)

Marik: well we have to do something...

Yeth: I GOT IT!

Marik: hey your not an obedient slave any- I mean... YETH!... you're awake.

Yeth: yup and I know exactly what to do.

(Yeth cuts the ropes and manages to jump down)

Marik: what are you going to do?

Yeth: Negotiate with the Negoi. They might be able to dominate people but I have a few charms of my own.

Marik: ummm Yeth I think you should know that-

Yeth: NO TIME! One's coming.

(three minuets later)

Yeth: good news guys. My new friend over there is letting us be his property as long as we give him all our weapons.

Marik: gee Yeth you sure did a great job.

Yeth: Thanks Marik.

Buckrill: I hate you all.

(Inside a Negoi tent, a Negoi inspects Optamis)

Negoi: you're made of shiny metal... yes very good, VERY good.

Optamis: what are you talking about?

Negoi: some guy want you for THOUSANDS of shinnies. His name Megatron.

Optamis: WHAT!?

(An illusion of the lord of blades appears on top of Optamis)

Lord of Blades: PRIME! It's good to see you again.

Optamis: MEGATRON! what are you doing?

LoB: quite simple really. I discovered a pure form of Energon on this planet, something that these pathetic backwater people call "Dragonshards" and I shall use them to conquer all of Cybertron.

Optamis: NO!! I WON'T LET YOU!

LoB: AND WHAT DO YOU PLAN TO DO TO STOP ME PRIME!?

Optamis: I'm gonna... I'm gonna

(the tent explodes as a truck goes flying out)

Optamis: TRANSFORM!

(Marik, Buckrill and Yeth see the truck drive up, stop in front of them and open the door)

Marik: AHH! GHOST TRUCK!

Buckrill: Wait... I recognize that paint job.

Optamis: Get in!

Marik: OPTAMIS!

Yeth: Optamis! I made a deal with the Negoi, don't worry I'm sure they-

Marik and Buckrill get down and shove her into the truck of Optamis as it drives off through the Negoi camp.
Charles Phipps

02-25-07, 09:07 PM		I thought our last date was more like 1017 YK, but maybe not.

You and your logic!

;-)
Charles Phipps

02-25-07, 09:07 PM		OOC: I really like Optamis.

Good job with your posts friend.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

02-25-07, 09:25 PM		Chance stands on a bleak Karnathi moor over looking a squat fortress of unforgiving granite ringed by a high spiked wall. Around him those of the paladin Lisa assigned him and who did not loose faith with her death, his pirate crew, a number of others sent by Naz’roth, or present by there own will or conscience. Thunder rolls between the distant hills and the flicker of lightning casts odd, fleeting shadows.

Chance “There it is folks. The place where I was born, the most secure Karnathi base ever built. The Grey school.”

Female paladin “I don’t like it sir. Listen to that storm, its an omen.”

Chance grins “My lady, the Thunder may be rolling, but the dice are mine.”

(OOC: If any one wants to join in liberating the enslaves students of a school for changing assassins now is the time to post your presence in the force. Please try and keep the draconic occupation going another few days so Chance gets to play spy master :bigeyes: )
rampant

02-25-07, 09:37 PM		Chalky - Distraction is ready.:D

Chanse - what did you do?

A fleet of balloons is drifting towards the school from every direction. Archers on the wall respond and the ballons burst open spewing forth hundreds of gallons of sticky fast dry paint laced with itch powder into the campus.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-25-07, 09:49 PM		13 - :D

Silver - You've decided to target me now huh?
13: I's m'job.

Silver: Anyway, you can't get passed my shield of disappointment. :(

13: At what? :confused:

Silver: The Shadow and The Fury, it was a great combination.

Bunny: I'm still holding out for Onatar so we can get some cheap high-tech destruction in here. :fett:
(OOC: If any one wants to join in liberating the enslaves students of a school for changing assassins now is the time to post your presence in the force. Please try and keep the draconic occupation going another few days so Chance gets to play spy master :bigeyes: )
OOC: I would, but all my task-force characters are on a demi-plane we currently can't access serving drinks.

By the way, I'm making a list of all the important bad-guys of Eberron that we've beaten and/or humiliated to the point where they aren't a threat:
Dreaming Dark (and by extension, the Inspired)
rakshasa in the Silver Flame
Ariajne (though I can't recall him being mentioned in a sourcebook I've read)
Krozen
Daughters of Sora Kell
nearly every dragon on Eberron right now
Charles Phipps

02-25-07, 09:52 PM		IC:

Arijana is actually a imported Ravenloft villain. He's the King of the Rakashasa in the Steaming Lands.

Don't forget Mordain Fleshweaver.

And the Dragons are remarkably unbeaten despite the beating they're taking. There's only ten thousand taking part in the occupation and there's some ten million on Argonessan ;-)
rampant

02-25-07, 09:53 PM		Ketty - Off duty, finally. *sees Feal-thas* You male! massage my feet!

Naz'roth - You sure she's not a Greyhawk drow?

Tara - I wonder sometimes.
------------------------------------

Corre - Teiza, where are you going?

Teiza - Argonessen.

Corre - Why?

Teiza - Cause if there's 10 million of the giant eating machines living there with their seren retainers, its gotta be swarming with food.
Charles Phipps

02-25-07, 10:03 PM		Where do you think Dire [insert animals] come from?

;-)

Their masses herds of Dire Cows take care of most of the problem.
rampant

02-25-07, 10:17 PM		Teiza - Not anymore:D

Green Dragon Duke - But we'l starve!

Teiza - How many dragons would this feed?

Green D.D. - Admittwdly this is just mine.

Teiza - Any mates or children?

Green - D.D. - No, why-

*chomp*

Teiza - mmmmm spicy!
DragoonDarkfire

02-25-07, 10:29 PM		Day 6, Almost at Xoriat's core

Marik: thanks to Optamis's truck form we're nearly at the core of all madness.

Yeth: how come we haven't been driven insane yet?

Buckrill: Marik is too perverted to be insane, I'm already a creature of madness, Optamis apparently doesn't give a sh** and you're such a dumb blond you think this entire plane is made out of chocolate.

(Yeth is eating a Mindflayers head)

Yeth: did you say something?

Optamis: WE'RE HERE!

(The truck stops in front of a huge white sphere)

Buckrill: this is the source of all Madness?

Marik: apparently.

(they get out and Optamis transforms back into his humanoid form)

Optamis: We're going inside?

Buckrill: I guess so...

Marik: LET'S GO!

(They all walk toward the white sphere and eventually find themselves in a huge blank white space)

Buckrill: ... this is it?

Marik: I was expecting something more... maddening.

(in a huge flash they see a dragon appear before them that is composed of random pieces of flesh)

Marik: AH!... what are you?

Dragon: hello and welcome to the center of the realm of madness. I am Xoriat.

Yeth: don't you mean THIS is Xoriat?

Xoriat: No. I AM Xoriat, I am the dragon of madness.

Optamis: ... what?

Xoriat: allow me to elaborate. Your plane Eberron is composed of three dragons right? Siberys, Eberron and Khyber.

Marik: and 13.

Xoriat: what? Never mind. Anywho every plane also carries a dragon as well. I was the dragon of madness and when Khyber and Siberys went fighting for the Prophecy I was banished and became the plane you see before you.

Marik: so... there are dragons for EVERY plane out there?

Xoriat: yup.

Optamis: There's a dragon called Dalquore?

Xoriat: mmmhmmm

Yeth: but I thought the dreaming dark was the center?

Xoriat: No. The dreaming dark IS dalquore. The dragon of- "Too much medication" your Kalashtar performances to turn the great wheel to the age of light is nothing more then a practice that's getting all those toxins out of his hormone systems.

Marik: ... this is disturbing.

Xoriat: well I AM the dragon of madness.

Buckrill: well great. We saw the core of Xoriat. Lets leave.

Xoriat: sure. I'll teleport you out myself. But don't worry we'll meet soon.

Marik: why?

Xoriat: In a month or so all the planes will become comatose with Eberron.

Buckrill: ... what will that mean?

Xoriat: Well what did you think Siberys and Khyber were fighting over? Did you believe that they were the ONLY dragons who wanted the prophecy?

Marik: ... what does this mean?

Xoriat: it means all the dragons from each plane are going to come to Eberron to compete in a grand war that will make the Dragon/Feind war look like a barstool brawl.

Yeth: I thought DalQuore was remote for good...

Xoriat: not for long. I'll teleport you back now. I hope you're all ready for an Eberron destroying god battle.

Marik: CAN'T WE-

(they all disappear and reappear back on the FF)

Marik: talk this over...

(Kanatash walks by)

Yeth: HEY KANATASH! Guess what we heard.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-25-07, 11:36 PM		Elina passed through the portal left by her mother, still glowing from the incredible release she had just undergone. The weight of years had lifted from her shoulders. The first thing she had to do once she was done was give Lilly a "pass out from lack of oxygen" kiss.

Elina: So here you are.

Shadow: You...you will not defeat me! Khyber and I will tear down this flawed realm and build a new one from the ashes! You exist only to serve as my vessel!

The Shadow was indeed a shell of his former self. It was disturbing enough to see him twitching so fervently, but the sunken eyes and hollow expression were almost pitiful. Nearby were the imprisoned souls she and the Shadow had collected, as well as the Silver Dragon Queen keeping the Shadow separated from them.

Elina: You've been had, Shadow. I heard what Uncle Rose said. Just...leave my mind in peace and maybe Mom will be lenient.

Shadow: Fool! Kick me out all you want, I will return! You will fall to me completely one day, and that is when I will bring this world to it's knees!

???: That can be remedied.

Shadow: Who's there?!

A light shines from the portal Elina had passed through. A hand, glowing with the power of Law, grabbed the side and began pulling the rest of the being through.

Shadow: No...no it can't be! I sealed you out!

Aureon: But this little one let me in of her own accord.

Elina: :confused: I did?

Aureon: Not intentionally, no. You see, you are not truly my shadow's Chosen. You are mine.

Elina stared at him, confused for a moment, till she remembered the incident with Lilly. That warmth that stopped her from finishing that horrible act was the same she felt from Aureon. She had felt that same presence from time to time, usually at moments when she was ready to do something truly and irrevocably evil.

Aureon: When your mother outmaneuvered the pitiful creature you see before you and became one of us, he couldn't stand it. He managed to seal my path to you while you were still forming within her womb. I have been trying to break through, but I had no true path to get to you. For leaving you at his mercy, I must apologize...

Elina: You're apologizing...to me?

Aureon: Even the gods are not above failure. But there is another thing I must atone for and have denied all these years.

Aureon marches over to the Shadow, staring him down and causing the now humbled diety to cringe.

Aureon: You have brought chaos, dispair, and endless suffereing to the people of Eberron. This child, pure of heart and spirit, was the subject of some of your most foul manipulations. Murder, rape, and wanton destruction were committed and sanctioned in your name. Yet...I did nothing.

-----

Shadow: No...NO! HE WILL NOT HAVE ME!

Lilly: Seems your time is up.

With a final slash, Lilly breaks the Shadow's resolve. The broken half trapped with Lilly once more rejoins the now crushed half that had remained with Elina.

-----

Shadow: GET AWAY FROM ME!!

Half crazed by this crushing loss on all fronts, the Shadow leapt at Aureon in a last ditch attempt to escape his inevitable demise. Aureon merely grabbed the Shadow, holding him tightly with minimal effort.

Aureon: I bear the burden for not stopping you. I absolved myself by saying you were no longer a true part of me. But no more. Shadow...

The Shadow cringes again, waiting for the hammer.

Aureon: ...I take you back.

In a flash of light, Elina finds herself back in the real world. A hand on her back startles her, but she relaxes the moment she sees it's owner.

Lilly: :) You back with us, now?

Elina struggled to her feet, exhausted but with an indescribable feeling of relief. She felt a rush of warmth course through her, replacing the hate, the rage, and the loneliness. Mystical light swirled about her as she released all the souls she had imprisoned. The Dragons power flowed out of her, but in their place was a peace unlike any she had known in half a decade. As they left, the Shadow's influence followed. Her wings, blackened by his foul presense, shed the darkness like soot. Beneath the formerly forboeding darkness, a gleaming white shown through.

Lilly: You're finally doing it again.

Elina: What?

Lilly: I've been waiting to see that truly happy smile for more than four years.

Elina looked at him for a while, taking in all that had happened. There was only one thing she could think to say.

Elina: *her voice shaking* He's gone... He's really gone, Lilly...

Lilly: :) And he won't be bothering you any longer.

Elina: ...I'm...free...? *leaps at Lilly* :D :weep: I'M FREE! :D :weep:

As they fell to the ground, Elina made good on her promise to herself. Lilly didn't even mind as he passed out.
rampant

02-25-07, 11:51 PM		Satnak - Congratulations! Pity though wanted to take a swing at the shadow myself. As for you young ladies 1000 laps go!

Elina - awww come on!

Sarah - You can't be serious!

Levy - I'd listen kids she hasn't gotten to hurt anybody all week.

Ketty - Where do you think you're going Tirmek!

Tirmek - dammit!

Satnak - To the obstacle course, I just put in a gravity amp over section 34 that i wanna test out.

Tirmek - Oh no you don't you're coming with us too mr. all i know is cumpulsion spells!

Sithis - Curses!

Gaz - I'm not the changeling you're looking for.

Forbes - Jedi mind tricks don't work on me kid.

Dorvos - *whisper* cheeze it girls.

Serene - Not so fast kids!

Corre and Teiza - Awwwww!

Terra - You four as well.

Momo - We don't even go to that school yet!

Dies - If you steal my spot I'll shove a rod of web down your throat.

Scias - Y...y...yes'm.

Nina - I've got the first-aid kit.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-26-07, 12:06 AM		Nina = Nice

Deis = Mean

*sigh*

I know they're twins and all, but...

:P :D

Gaz - I'm not the changeling you're looking for.:rofl:
Paulon

02-26-07, 12:12 AM		Would you want to be 'healed' using Deis' idea of a first aid kit? Paint and sovereign glue are bad enough on the outside... ;)
Kaizer_Ryu

02-26-07, 12:18 AM		Oh, right. Before I forget AGAIN:

Paulon gets a :turkey: for properly identifying a semi-obscure game reference.

If any of you care, Mid-Boss is the name the 'heros' of Disgaea called Dark Adonis, a recurring character/"enemy" who was neither a major threat nor really any kind of real bad guy, and they didn't even consider it worth remembering his name.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-26-07, 12:49 AM		Terra: Is it done?

Aureon: Yes. He stretched himself so thin, I was able to reintegrate him without much resistance. Though I must thank you. Your efforts carried the day.

Terra: I'm flattered, but all I could do is show her the way. It was up to my daughter to reach for it.

Aureon: You also stopped the rest of them from doing precisely what Khyber wanted.

Terra: Hints and signs. You know as well as I do that I couldn't do anything more than that.

Aureon: But you succeeded in getting the hints heeded. That is an accomplishment in and of itself. Do not take these things lightly. There is still more to do.

Terra: Indeed. *warps out*

-----

Achika: He really was a fool...don't you think so?

Terra: You got what you wanted and then cut him loose. You disgust me.

Achika: *chuckle* Funny, hearing that from you. I seem to remember you would do far worse things than that all those years ago.

Terra: As if a measely few hundred years means anything to you. Unlike you, however, I can still change. That is why I am still unique among the Sovereigns.

Achika: *mockingly* Oh, poor me. What ever shall I do? I have a set personality and a complete world view that suits me and my goals just fine. How terrible!

Terra: Gloat all you want, Tiamat. You just got stalemated by a rookie. *disappears*

Achika: :smirk: But you have yet to win the war, little one. So much more must be decided before the final judgement...
ratslinky

02-26-07, 01:07 AM		Gaz - I'm not the changeling you're looking for.

Gaz Prime: *Currently on sipping milkshakes in Xen'drik* Hehe so true

Gaz 5: Another Strawberry milkshake miss Anathemar

Mareth: Yes please
rampant

02-26-07, 01:34 AM		Illis - Alright boys you know the drill.

Telfon - Yoink!

Scias - Y..y..y..yoink!

Marenth - Bloody hell

Gaz(prime) - Crud

Satnak - *Looming glare*

Gaz - Oh crap!

Forbes - You and I need to have a talk about the eth-thical implicationsssss of duplicassshion techniquesssssss.
rampant

02-26-07, 01:47 AM		Satnak - Pleease!

Terra - No!

Tirmek - We'll only kill her a little :bigeyes:

Terra - :gah: How did you do that!

Tirmek - I learned it from Sarah.

Terra - We can't just kill a deity! it would destabilize-

Satnak - Yeah yeah unbind the balance of creation, end of the world, doomsday, and such.

Tirmek - Like i said, yes there is an essential element to the world in every diety, but it doesn't have to be attached to that diety, or even a mind.

Terra - What happened to Toren's anyway?

Tirmek - :yuck:

Satnak - Well Toren was blasted to oblivion. The primordial essence of fear that he tapped into exists in most sentient minds so no big shift there.

Terra - Khyber is also has the realm beneath.

Tirmek - Excising its intelligence wont alter that. Though a new monitoring system would be needed, a drone to keep all the dials in thee plant at the right level. Depending on the complexity it shouldn't take more than a month or so to put together a program to do it. Less if I can get a good look at the network itself, instead of having to work from inference based on the eberron and syberis networks.

Terra - Excuse me?

Tirmek - Well I've had five years to sudy those two, they are plainly visible. To see Kyhber I have to get past the eberron lines and if i block them out I loose alot of the upper levels of the Khyber links.

Terra - Why would you even want programs like that?

Tirmek - Its gonna be my thesis, killing dieties for fun and profit.
ratslinky

02-26-07, 01:48 AM		Suddenly all the Gaz's teleport in

All the Gazs: How can you tell if I'm the original Gaz? We have all the same powers and all the same souls there is no way to tell us apart
rampant

02-26-07, 01:56 AM		Forbes - Because they all trace back to you.

Gaz (prime) - Not this again:rolleyes:

Forbes - Energitic sight is a valuable tool, also I can do this.

Forbes - Volshk Crebleos Unsinpig Mercurius Faltor (Dispel the Unworthy)

All of the gaz's aside from Gaz prime evaporate.

Forbes - Cremeloth Soltiare! (Speaker's seal) Until you learn to use this power in a responsible and ethical manner it will be limited to no more than 2.
----------------------------------------------------------------

OOC: This is not an attack Slinky its just Forbes noting a disturbing problem in one of his students and acting to correct it. Yes this is a bit further than I like to go with someone else's character, but if you through uber stuff like that in his face without treating the ability with the respect it derserves it pisses him off. Also he's not happy about the possibility of Gaz turning his other students into clones. Moral : Don't get cute with Forbes.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-26-07, 02:21 AM		Gaz: Awwww...

Terra: Trust me, kid. If he can tell which one of me is the real one, you've got no chance.

Tirmek: Well?

Terra: I can honestly say that it's a bad idea. Khyber is even more fundamental to this world than the Shadow ever was. Achika is the current vessel, and we know who she is and what she looks like (originally). Kill her, and we're back in the dark.

Tirmek: Like I said, we just kill the intelligent part.

Terra: And I'm saying you can't do that. Had you done that to the Shadow, it may have worked. He wasn't an original diety, just the outcast part of Aureon that retained sentience. If you try that with Khyber, all you would accomplish is the destruction of the current vessel. Has it occured to you that if Achika could truly channel Khyber, every single one of us would be dead umpteen times over before we could blink? Tiamat is the best she can push past Eberron's seal. To give you an idea of the exact power difference between Tiamat and Khyber, think of a level 1 Commoner quadrapalegic goblin with severe head trauma vs. a Level 300 Greater Prismatic Dire Tarresque with Vorpal Claws, Improved Critical, permanent Haste, the ability to nullify any and all of it's opponents magical bonuses or abilities, and the ability to cast Hadoken at will.

All: :blink:

Terra: I may need to add more to that, but you get the idea. The part we face is only the tip of the iceberg. Kill her, and we need to find the new vessel. We simply could not kill them fast enough to do any real damage to Khyber's ability to manifest in this way. In the mean time, we would exhasut ourselves in the hunt for her avatars, and she would continue her plans almost completely unhindered.

OOC: There is a way to break the cycle, but that's the focus of an entire upcoming arc.
rampant

02-26-07, 02:30 AM		Tirmek - Could we sever her spinal chord and keep her locked up?

Terra - You are a twisted little one sometimes. No, as enjoyable as that sounds, she has a mental contingency that shuts down the brain if the body looses the ability to act for more than a certain period of time.
Paulon

02-26-07, 02:39 AM		Paulon gets a :turkey: for properly identifying a semi-obscure game reference.

Thanks. Given your enthusiasm for the various games of that genre I sometimes think it's a pity I don't have the time to play any of them, even if I had a PS2 or similar machine.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-26-07, 02:40 AM		Terra: She's linked to Khyber. Minus destroying her completely, she's harder to kill than Izzy. And it hurts her less when you try.

Izzy: You've got a betting pool to see who can kill me first going, I know it!

Kithle: :shifty: No I don't...

Terra: Any damage you do wouldn't last long. You think my girls heal fast? They don't hold a candle to her.
rampant

02-26-07, 02:53 AM		Tirmek - So does this mean we could play polo with her head?

Terra - Your ****** at her aren't you.

Disarray - hehehehe

Terra - What did you do?
--------------------------------

Achika - What was that purple thing that tried to swim down my throat :yuck:. And what are these capsules it put in me? And why does my stomach itch?
--------------------------------------

Disarray - She's gonna be farting itchy dust for the next hundred years!
----------------------------------

OOC: Doesn't technically count as an injury or poison. If you can't kill them Annoy them.

13 - I like Disarray
------------------------------------

Kithle - Walking by with an armload of cash.

Izzy - I thought you said you didn'y have a pool on me!

Kithle - I didn't thanks for the idea.:D

Izzy - Bastard

Kithle - Say it!

Izzy - Magnificent bastard.
---------------------------------------

Ketty - I know they're nice shoes, but you're a guy this is a little creepy.

Feal-thas - Ok listen I am not getting hot and bothered by your shoes. I'm looking for the reason your ankles are aching all the time.
ratslinky

02-26-07, 07:15 AM		OORatslinky: Thanks rampant I was trying to think of a way to limit Gaz's soul power and I completely forgot about seals
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-26-07, 08:21 AM		Ketty - I know they're nice shoes, but you're a guy this is a little creepy.

Feal-thas - Ok listen I am not getting hot and bothered by your shoes. I'm looking for the reason your ankles are aching all the time.
Silver: :w00t:

Bunny: :dancin:

13: :evillaugh
*********
Deep in the Forest of Kobolds there is an area where the plants overgrow great monuments carved long ago. The faces are of no creature found alive today, except a few bear a passing resemblence to a kobold. If the viewer travels deeper and deeper the ruins become more frequent, until they make up an entire city of monuments to something. However the plants have grown so dense that it would be impossible to see the ruins from anywhere except the ground level.

Yet there is one open area at the center of the monument city, a mosaic floor that no plant will come near. It's picture is almost a blurr, colors arranged almost randomly in their pursuit of portaying the desired scene. But if one stares for hours and tries very hard, they might see some draconic creature waving about a spear.

Suddenly a hand thrusts up through the mosaic, a hand of black drow skin nearly covered up by the various draconic and fiendish scales, with claws worthy of a rakshasa.…………
cypher_zero

02-26-07, 10:06 AM		OOC: Jeeze! So this is what happens when I disappear for a few days! Curse you Neverwinter Nights 2!! But... so... good... Must... play... MORE!
.
DragoonDarkfire

02-26-07, 10:42 AM		(Marik, Optamis and Buckrill walk in on the others)

Marik: so... what happened while we were fighting for our lives and discovering the precursur to a new god battle?
rampant

02-26-07, 10:49 AM		Kithle - Who are you again?

Micheal - Better question where were you when we were fightiing dragons left and right.!
DragoonDarkfire

02-26-07, 11:25 AM		Marik: speaking of dragons...

Buckrill: Eberron is going to be invaded...

Optamis: But dragons... of every plane.

(Marik explains that every plane has a dragon that was once freinds/family with Siberys, Eberron and Khyber and that they're all comeing in a month to fight for the prophecy)

Marik: so yea we're boned... who wants to enjoy their last month of life?
rampant

02-26-07, 11:41 AM		Satnak - Can I kill them please!
Kaizer_Ryu

02-26-07, 11:44 AM		Terra: Oh, that, yeah. See, the thing is, it's not as bad as it seems.

Marik: So instead of dying slowly and painfully it'll be quick?

Terra: :nonono: *sigh* Much like Khyber, no progenitor can manifest here. It will be their avatars, either in humanoid form or dragon form, most likely the former.

Buckrill: And you know this because...?

Terra: Sovereign. Comes with the territory. Anyway, in all likelihood, it will take the form of something similar to what just happened between myself and Tiamat. There are still rules that must be followed. I may be fully manifest, but I am under heavy constraints. The ones coming must obey those same rules.

Marik: So instead of straight fight where we all die but know who our friends and foes are...

Terra: It's a battle of wits, yes.

OOC: Sorry to butt in on your plot, but this is roughly how we've developed Eberronian cosmology. Trust me, this is merely a shift from "You all die horribly" to "You'll probably die really fast if you're lucky".
DragoonDarkfire

02-26-07, 11:50 AM		Marik: well that's a- wait... wouldn't all of the planes of Eberron comeing together kinda trigger a whole explosion of outsiders onto Eberron causing thousands of monstrocities from other planes to enter into our world?

Burckrill: kinda like a whole Planar war?

Optamis: very well. I can see where this is going.

(Optamis transforms into a truck)

Optamis: I must leave.

Marik: where to?

Optamis: Cybertron. I need to gather an army to FIGHT MEGATRON!

Marik: ... you do that big guy.

(Optamis drives away)

Buckrill: back to the whole "We die very, very soon"
Lord Kale Fangblade

02-26-07, 12:13 PM		Naz'roth: *sigh* we cant even go five minuets without the world ending.

Tara: We havnt even started rebuilding our demi-plane yet.

OOC: by the way rampant. Curse of Despair is actually the Warlock version of bestow curse.
rampant

02-26-07, 12:23 PM		OOC: Oh okay then, i saw the word despair and though mind-influencing effect sorry.
-------------------------------------------

Rose - Mmmm platypus eggs.

Buckrill - I'm a guy platypus.

Rose - .... LUCKY!
Charles Phipps

02-26-07, 12:26 PM		Okay, that last one just freaked me out.

;-)
DragoonDarkfire

02-26-07, 12:29 PM		OCC: You are aware platypus eggs can easily fit on the end of your pinky right?
Charles Phipps

02-26-07, 12:30 PM		OCC: You are aware platypus eggs can easily fit on the end of your pinky right?

Not Dire WERE-Platypus eggs.
DragoonDarkfire

02-26-07, 12:49 PM		I made a wiki entry for Buckrill if anyone cares. (http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Buckrill_Beaverwood)

and one for Marik as well. (http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Marik_Denieth)
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-26-07, 01:57 PM		"You all die horribly" to "You'll probably die really fast if you're lucky".
Buckrill: back to the whole "We die very, very soon"
Bunny: Here's hoping. :evillaugh
rampant

02-26-07, 02:20 PM		OOC: Um little thing Darkfire, the second generation is reserved for those who were born into the crew or joined as children. At least that was my understanding.
---------------------------------------------------

OOCharles - Ok new meat time for your initiation.

OORamapnt - (in mewtwo suit) :D select your fighter!
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

02-26-07, 04:45 PM		Chance “Distraction is n place, now for the feint”

Paladin “Troops in place sir”

Chance “Commence”

All in plate the paladin charge the seemingly unbreakable gates, the few guards not beset by Chalky’s itching paint do nothing, till at the last moment the paladin part ranks and a blazing lance of arcane energy tears the gates off there hinges. The assault begins, panic rising in the guards.

Chance watches and turns to Ver d’Gris “Is every thing ready?”

Ver “Aye sir, the prize ship we took is flying Karn colours and your uniform is ready.”

Chance “Lets do the thing.”

As panic rises and the paladin press ever deeper into the fortress Chance unshapes his melds, abandons his habitual disguises, dons, with a shiver of revulsion a Karnathi military uniform of black and grey, brings his prize ship around to the open landing nest atop the keep, they would know the moment he lied. The airship lands, greeted by a hevy set man from the upper ramparts.

Defence commander “Commandant, your not meant to be here.”

Chance “The headmaster sent a distress call. We were closest” Ihh ‘The old raven will have sent a call and we know if anything was closer cos they’d be clawing us out of the sky’

Defence commander “How do you even know of this place?”

Chance “Your not really cleared, but I’m a former student. Now I need your full cooperation. This airship is ready to take the students and mothers to a secure location, I don’t think you want to wait for those violent thanes to find out what’s here do you?”

Defence commander “No Commandant, I’ll have my men start the evacuation” turns, giving commands.

Chance “One last thing, the head master, where is he?”
(That’s it for today, stay tuned for the final act some time tomorow)
rampant

02-26-07, 05:25 PM		Gaurd - Sure glad that we're not supposed to leave our posts for anything.

Gaurd 2 - A moment ago you had to go to the bathroom.

Gaurd - Not after what happened to the front gate.

Gaurd 2 - You're disgusting.
DragoonDarkfire

02-26-07, 05:28 PM		Marik: Very well.

(leaves and then comes back in a Roy outfit)

Marik: LET'S GET IT AWWWWN!

Huge Heavenly Voice: MELEE!
rampant

02-26-07, 05:59 PM		OORampant - Eat plasma cannon!

OOKaizer - You and your superscope fixation.
ratslinky

02-26-07, 06:01 PM		OORatslinky: Are there any rules for choosing an OOC warrior?
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-26-07, 06:04 PM		OORatslinky: Are there any rules for choosing an OOC warrior?
OOC: A bit of unspoken conscensous is that it should be a Super Smash Bros Melee character. Of course, you are not required to participate. I mean, I don't.
DragoonDarkfire

02-26-07, 06:14 PM		Marik: HA! Unlucky for you I got THIS-

(Marik holds up bat)

Marik: ... A BAT!? What am I going to do with THIS!?

(OCCRampant charges)

Marik: EEK!

(Marik unwittingly commits a smash attack and the home run bat's ultimate power is unleashed, knocking OOCRampant off the stage)

Big voice: THIS GAMES WINNER IS!... MERIK!
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-26-07, 06:16 PM		OOC: :eek: Oh man, do I feel sorry for you.
DragoonDarkfire

02-26-07, 06:26 PM		OCC: was that at me or him?
rampant

02-26-07, 06:31 PM		OORampant - This isn't a one life match. *Psychic! charge shot* *Superscope! charge shot*

OODragoon - Geh!ugh!

OORampant begins pummeling dragoon against a wall with physical attacks.

OOrampant - Eat genitically engineered pokefist!
DragoonDarkfire

02-26-07, 06:36 PM		Dragoon grapples with Rampant for a second before slicing at him with his sword and throwing him into a nearby wall.

Dragoon runs over and places a land mine near him and begins charging his super Roy fire burst attack while taunting Rampant.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-26-07, 07:50 PM		OOC: rampant is the E.B.N.E. of Most Überness, and he/she/e/it does not like to lose.
DragoonDarkfire

02-26-07, 07:51 PM		OCC: Well guess what. Neither do I...
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

02-26-07, 08:12 PM		:w00t: OOC Eled: We interupt our sheduled posting with news of a new Firefly serise being confirmed http://uk.comics.ign.com/articles/767/767781p1.html for details. that opener again: :w00t: Entertanment news brought to you by the Korangerg chronicle in assoisation with the Trust, we hear everything.
DragoonDarkfire

02-26-07, 08:15 PM		(The battle is over and we're all sitting around having tea)

Marik: well it was good that we were able to settle our dispute like gentlemen.

Rampant: indeed.

Dragoon: quite.

Buckrill: hmmm yes.

Marik: (sips tea) ... by the way. What about the whole planar wars thing?
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-26-07, 09:37 PM		Marik: (sips tea) ... by the way. What about the whole planar wars thing?
OOcat: Business as usual.

OOC: Note: always put OO before the name of any poster (except maybe DungeonJ). That helps us know they represent the poster and not a new character.
Also OOcat should never be shown to have a visual manifestation, and probably not a physical one either. You haven't made that mistake, I'm just paranoid.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-26-07, 10:04 PM		In the low light of the room, soft music plays as Terra dances. Oddly enough, she seems to be dancing with someone, but no one else is visible...

Terra: You should have seen her...I've never been so proud...

Lisa: :) She's just like her mother. Stubborn, yet strong of heart.

Terra: I'm still...unsure I can do this without you...

Lisa: You've never once given me reason to worry. The way you helped Elina is proof enough that you have what it takes. You handled it perfectly.

Terra: I only wish you were really here to say that...

Lisa: I know, hon...I know. I'm going to miss out on seeing our children grow, so I'm counting on you to give them hugs enough for both of us.

Terra: *giggle* I'm trying, love.

Lisa: Just remember to let yourself grieve, too. I know how much losing me hurt you...

Terra: :( ...it's the little things I miss most. Your smile, your hand running through my hair, the warmth of your touch, the sound of your breathing as you sleep...

Lisa: It's the little things that matter most, love. Keep them forever in your heart, and I will be here. Just remember, I was never happier than when I was with you. I will be there to greet you with open arms when your time comes...

Terra: *sniff* Thank you, my love. But for now, can I keep pretending you're here?

Lisa: Take all the time you need, hon...

Outside the room, two figures watch quietly through a crack in the door as Terra continues her dance.

Nina: *whispers* What's Mom doing? She's been really quiet for a while...

Sarah: Shhhhh...you'll understand when you're older.
rampant

02-26-07, 11:13 PM		Tirmek - Indeed, though the bond shared was not the same as your parents hold. I wached my mother re-adapt to single life as well. It's not easy.

Nina - You're hanging around alot.

Tirmek - Meh, mother is still burning off 13 years of cellibacy.
urial angel of death

02-26-07, 11:45 PM		Volrath appears before the dragon claimin to be Xoriat.

Volrath: Father why must you lie to the simple minded humans?

Nyarlathotep: *shedding the dragon mask* It's just so much fun.

Volrath: Alright, but could you atleast visit your grandchildren some time soon.

Nyarlathotep: I am he of a thousand masks. How do you know I'm not with them right now?

Volrath: Huh?

Nyarlathotep: At any time any person on the ship could be me. :D

Volrath: Damnit why does everything have to be so complicated.
-----------
Izzy: Kithle I put twenty trillion galleons on me killing myself. Give the winnings to an orphanage in need. Said orphanage can have no affiliation with you or anyone known to you even in the most passing of ways. I also have a thirty-five page legal document drawn up by Reman to prevent you from getting the money.

OOC: This isn't to attack you Dragoon, but the way the cosmology has been built up, Xoriat is outside the other planes and has no core. It is simply all that is not reality. It is where new realities are spawned. If Eberron and its moons were a galaxy, Xoriat is the space around galaxies.

Also just to say Twilight Princess is Amazing!
rampant

02-26-07, 11:58 PM		Kithle - One problem.

Izzy - *Holding up a cyanide pill* Huh?

Kithle - *finger of death*

Izzy - Hick!...*collapse*...Gets back up. What the hell?

Kithle - The rules say you can't bet on yourself, its too easy.

Izzy - Oh, makes sense, then why did you-

Kithle - I get a cut no matter who laid the bet.

Izzy - You magnificent bastard.
urial angel of death

02-27-07, 12:01 AM		Kithle - One problem.

Izzy - *Holding up a cyanide pill* Huh?

Kithle - *finger of death*

Izzy - Hick!...*collapse*...Gets back up. What the hell?

Kithle - The rules say you can't bet on yourself, its too easy.

Izzy - Oh, makes sense, then why did you-

Kithle - I get a cut no matter who laid the bet.

Izzy - You magnificent bastard.


OOC: Izzy wasn't actually going to kill himself yet. He was just placing the bet as an eventuality. After all if he killed himself it would be permenant. Also Izzy is immune to death effects.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-27-07, 12:12 AM		OOC: Why does this scene keep playing in my head?

Dal Quor

Dreaming Dark: Oh, come ON! This is a once in existance chance for us!

Mob of Quori: *chanting* Hell no! We won't go! *repeat*

The mob swarms around the Dreaming Dark, holding signs reading things like "The End is near!", "She will destroy us all!", "Rathar il-Yannah than the Deicide!", "The d'Borisheel woman still waits!", and the like.

Dreaming Dark: You're telling me you'd rather face complete destruction of the Quor Tarai than one Half-Elven woman?!

Mob: YES!

:D

I love Secrets of Sarlona.
rampant

02-27-07, 01:17 AM		Satnak - That's right you you're all my *****es!

Serene - And you're mine get back to bed, and no sleeping!
rampant

02-27-07, 02:06 AM		Announcer voice - (i.h.h. now if I can just get out of here before- ) AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHK

Chalky - *crunch* *rip* *tear* *chew* *munch* *gnaw*
DragoonDarkfire

02-27-07, 10:28 AM		Marik: so that whole Dragon of Xoriat thing was just a joke?

Volrath: pretty much. Excusse my father.

Bukcrill: this Nyarlathotep sounds suspiciously like the Traveler...

(they all hear a huge THUD as the ship rocks back a bit)

Marik: what the hell?

(Marik, Buckrill and Volrath appear ontop of the FF to see a truck, a lightning rail front car, a smaller three person airship and an astral cruiser)

Marik: ... what's this?

(The Truck turns into Optamis)

Optamis: I have returned. AUTOFORGED!

Train: TRAINRAIL! TRANSFORM!

Airship: RINGBLAST! TRANSFORM!

Astral Cruiser: PLANESHIFTER! TRANSFORM!

(they all transform into humanoid constructs)

Marik: ... okay what the khyber are you people?

Optamis: allow us to explain.

(Optamis's eyes lower)

Optamis: We live on a demi-plane far away from here. Our kind were originally built by the massive beasts you call the giants. We were meant to serve in a war with the Quori, but once that was was over a rebellion began.

I, Optamis prime lead my fellow Autoforged to a demiplane of reality where we remained. We called it, Cybertron. However we discovered that a second rebellion came from the southern end of Xen'drik as well. These constructs called themselves Deceptiforged and they were lead by a construct lord calling himself "Megatron".

Buckrill: WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING!?

Optamis: The autoforged and the deceptiforged lived on cybertron for eons. That was until we were drawn back here by a... re-emerging of our kind. When we saw your Warforged we instantly took an interest in Eberron. I sent one of my emmisaries, Bulwark to try and regain the freedom that we had fought for during the giant rebellion.

Marik: WAIT- Bulwark was working for you?

Optamis: Yes. He managed to get one of your kings to let the Warforged free so they could join us on Cybertron... Megatron had another idea. He began to lead himself and a group of deceptiforged against humans. Then he gained numerous Warforged followers. You know him as the lord of blades...

Buckrill: so. You and all these other Autoforged are here to lead a battle against the Lord of Blades in a huge battle for?...

Optamis: The fate of Cybertron and Eberron itself.

Marik: eh. It's an adventure hook as any.

(Marik turns around the bridge and shouts)

Marik: WHO WANTS TO WATCH GIANT ROBOTS FIGHT EACHOTHER!?
rampant

02-27-07, 11:26 AM		Ketler - We can watch that any time. Watch this, Hey you two potions of giant size!

Stupid - Stupid evolved to OAF!

Rashour - I found that frisbee i lost yesterday!

Ketler - FIGHT!

Giant city destroying melee ensues. The citizens of sharn set up an arena and start betting.
DragoonDarkfire

02-27-07, 11:58 AM		Marik: Hate to tell you Optamis but I don't think these guys are gonna help you unless you offer them something that they would actually want... whatever that is. I don't know.

Ketler: look pal. There's only thing I want in this world. A simple life with simple-

(a messenger Homocullus appears)

Homoclullus: BEEP!

Ketler: AH! D2R2. Do you have a message for me?

D2R2: BEEP!

(a small illusionary image of Jaela appears infront of the homoclullus)

Buckrill: HEY LOOK IT'S THAT GIRL THAT EVERY PEDOPHILE IN EBERRON IS AFTER!... WHY AM I SHOUTING!?

Jaela: KETLER!... GUYS!... ANYONE HELP! I've been kidnapped.

Ketler, Marik and every male heterosexual person on the FF: *GASP*

Jaela: KIDNAPPED BY-

(Jaela disappears and is replaced by an image of the Lord of Blades)

Optamis: MEGATRON!

LoB: Well well Prime. It's good to meet again. I've kidnapped this girl along with that idiot Boranel, that goth Kaius, almost all members of the Twelve AND Eradis d'Vol. All within my new base at the center of the Mournland.

Marik: what about Queen McB****b**** of Aundair?

LoB: are you nuts? I wouldn't touch that with a 60ft pole.

Buckrill: And let me guess. You're going to kill them all unless we go after you and enter into a climatic showdown of semi-notreallygoodmorelikeveryevil verses an evil that is opposeing us right?

LoB: well actually I was just gonna play a few games of Yu-Gi-Oh with them but that's much better.

Ketler: ... you play Yu-Gi-Oh?

LoB: ... Boranel thinks it's cool...
Charles Phipps

02-27-07, 12:14 PM		IC:

Darkfire, take a :rofl: for adapting autobot myth to Eberron.
rampant

02-27-07, 12:15 PM		OORampant - Although Boranel isn't very good, relies a little too much on attack points.

OO's - ...

OORampant - What?
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-27-07, 12:37 PM		Bunny: Also, Kaius is dead, killed by a dragon in the first few moments of the current war.

Kaius: I'm—

Bunny: HADOKEN!

As the few remaining atoms of Kaius cool 13 and Silver step up to the movie seats.

Silver: Who kidnaps Vol?

13: I think she falls under "old statesman".

Silver: I thought that was supposed to be "dignified old statesman".

13: We had to revise it after Boranal started holding keggers instead of peace summets.

Bunny: This guy's pretty good considering the quality of villain we usually get: he went for Boranal even though King Steve is ruling Breland.
***********
What happened at the kidnapping……………

Megatron: Listen, princess, there aren't enough dragonshards on all of Eberron for me to take that manifestation of Xoriat.

Princess Sara: Then kidnap me! People always care about the hot celebrities.

Megatron: Matrix no! You'll keep commenting on my villainy and insisting you could do a better job. Trust me, Garland wrote an article about it in the villain newletter.
DragoonDarkfire

02-27-07, 12:47 PM		(in Constructs new base, former Metrol)

Megatron: What do you mean you aren't the king of Breland anymore? Oh and I activate mirror force.

Boranal: BLAST!... well as I was saying I gave that job to my son King Steve.

Megatron: Well it doesn't matter. Even if you aren't the king of Breland any longer I still have plans for you, Jaela, Eradis, the Twelve AND Kaiu-

(Megatron see's the remains of Kaius)

Megatron: WHO KILLED KAIUS!?

Boranal: not it.

Jaela: Not it.

Eradis: Not it.

The Twelve: Not it.

Megatron: GRRRRRRRRRRRR FINE! I still have another few people that I can use.

(a deceptiforged walks in with a sack and rolls out a group of dwarves)

Dwarf: ACK! What are you doing?

Megatron: You are all the leaders of the Arum am I correct?

(the dwarves nod)

Megatron: excellent. Soon my plan shall come into place...
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-27-07, 01:20 PM		Princess Sarah: Sheesh, doesn't anyone have competant security these days?

13: :uh-huh: How did you get into the commentary box again?
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-27-07, 02:40 PM		OOC: A note to the new guy: no touchy this plotline. Or these characters. Or this universe.

The crew of the Forever Freedom is watching reruns of the Kanatash Springer Show while waiting for the bad guys to call.

Kitten: Hey, why didn't we invite Rose on this trip? He's minimally effective back in my universe.

Bruce: Ah…well…you see, there was this…incident…early on in his career:

if Rose had really been Link (http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=206)

Bruce:……and ever since then the Dragoneers and Captain Eberron refuse to work with him.
Charles Phipps

02-27-07, 02:53 PM		Rose: Oh like anyone cares about Trees.

*kicks Lorax*
Kaizer_Ryu

02-27-07, 07:16 PM		Elina: Aren't we gonna do something about all the Dragons still occupying Khorvaire?

OOKaizer: I've had a special plot-related request to extend their withdrawl deadline.

-----

OOEled: :zzz:

Chanse: :mad: *poke* *poke*

Ash: :evillaugh

-----

OOKaizer: I'm sure he's working hard on the rest of it as we speak.
rampant

02-27-07, 07:40 PM		Vermathraxisus'don - Hello are we invisible?

Elina - :gel:

Sarah - Reeeeeeaaaaaly big dragon.

Lily - Kybher's sweatshorts!

Hyrd - Hi daddy!

Ivy - hullo Mr.Don

Forbes - hello what do you thing we've been doing?
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-27-07, 07:48 PM		Silver: You could always hybrid them into oblivion.

Bunny: Only you could could cause a mass extinction with sound-effects found in the adult file.

FX demon: *hot and heavy*
Kaizer_Ryu

02-27-07, 08:11 PM		Elina: :eek: YOU'RE STILL KILLING THEM!?!?

Forbes: *sigh* :rolleyes: Not killing, driving out.

Sarah: Oh, good.

Forbes: Captain Rossssse told usssss all about it.

Elina: How the Dragons here are responsible for maintaining the myriad protections against uber evils like the Quori, the Daelkyr, Khyber, the Rajah, etc?

Vermathraxisus'don: Of course.

Elina: I still need to apologize...

Terra: There are some hard feelings on both sides. The loss of the Acendant Councellors has been a serious blow to their pride, but it has also forced them to take humanoids seriously. We still need them, but what they did here overstepped the bounds of their authority.

Forbes: ...you really don't hate them, do you? Even after what happened, I feel no ill will.

Terra: That was Lisa's final wish. She saw better than any of us the futility of revenge. If they offer surrender, take it. With the Councellors gone, their ability to maintain the protections in place around the world has been handicapped. They don't need to be fighting us right now. Believe it or not, we are on the same side.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

02-27-07, 08:30 PM		( ooc: Sorry folks Just started Dming a new campaign for my long standing group, I have an assessment due in my Geosciences course, and I started playing Dungeon Siege again. Don’t hold back on my account, I mean the worst that happens is Chance gets an extensive and highly trained black opps unit that technically doesn’t exist all neat and ready for the next big adventure. Stupid life giving me deadlines... :tantrum: )
rampant

02-27-07, 09:10 PM		Elina - Razzafragging homework.

Satnak - Sorry kid, its gotta get done, you need to catch up alot.

Sarah - Hey Tirmek ready to go?

Tirmek - Do I have to go as a female?

Sarah - I don't get enough opportunities to show you off this way. Now come along.

Tirmek - (in a simple green dress) Did I mention how much I hate dances.

Sarah - Nonsense your a very good dancer, when you let me lead.

Tirmek - I hate dances, not dancing.
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-27-07, 09:37 PM		Elina: How the Dragons here are responsible for maintaining the myriad protections against uber evils like the Quori, the Daelkyr, Khyber, the Rajah, etc?
13: I thought that was what the FF was for.

OOcat: No, the FF is for causing chaos and destruction that just happens to catch the bad-guys in the crossfire.
Tirmek - I hate dances, not dancing.
Tirmek (to 13): Any way you could let up?

13: Only if you let Kithle take over.

Tirmek: :eek: You call that "letting up"?

13: :D No, I call that "making the best out of a fab situation". Why do you think I employ the guy?
rampant

02-28-07, 01:24 AM		13: :D No, I call that "making the best out of a fab situation". Why do you think I employ the guy?

OORampant - because you revel in the pain and frustration of others and so does he, you just pay him so you don't get into an epic prankwar that would take time and atencion away from the rest of us poor saps.
rampant

02-28-07, 07:43 PM		At the punchbowl

Vedris - I see you finally dumped the chump.

Sarah - Nope:D !

Vedris - Then where is he?

Tirmek - (pathing to Sarah) oh this could be fun

Sarah - You act like you slept through cultural studies

13 - After that bender she threw, you bet she did

Tirmek - Don't you know anything about our customs. (i.h.h. :evillaugh:)

Vedris - :gel: (i.h.h. what is it what is it?! do you marry the siblings as well? the cousins? a special concubine? ohhhhhh drat it If i screw this up I'll look really dumb and then I'll no chance to pry her away from that little bookworm tirmek! HATE TIRMEK!) I... Uh gotta go find a bathroom. *yoink*

Sarah - :rolleyes: How do you keep your alignment?

13 - me again, its no fun if the prankster is pure evil, they get all creepy clown on me and that just isn't funny
SilvercatMoonpaw

02-28-07, 08:17 PM		OOC: I just did some major reworking of what characters are listed under Scum, Lesser Used, and No longer in use on the Wiki. Feel free to change things back, I was being strict.
Kaizer_Ryu

02-28-07, 10:44 PM		OORampant - Although Boranel isn't very good, relies a little too much on attack points.

OO's - ...

OORampant - What?
Boranel: :tantrum: I :tantrum: HATE :tantrum: CONTROL :tantrum: DECKS! :tantrum:

OOKaizer: :evillaugh

The field is as follows:

OOKazier

Monsters: Four face down cards; Stealth Bird, Swarm of Locusts, Swarm of Scarabs, Guardian Sphinx. One face up card; Sasuke Samurai. Helpoemer is in the Graveyard.

Magic/Traps - Face up; Gravity Bind, Vengeful Bog Spirit. Face down; Seven Tools of the Bandit, Magic Jammer.

Boranel

Monsters: None.

Magic/Traps - Face down; Woboku, Sakuretsu Armor, Magic Cylinder.

(Yes, we're playing with Ban Rules)

Boranel: :mad: I loathe you.

OOKazier: What's that? I can't hear you over the sound of me taking out another 1000 Life Points with Stealth Birds repeatable Special Ability.

OOC: I just felt compelled to do that for some reason. This is why Rei refused to play me. :evillaugh
rampant

03-01-07, 01:23 AM		OORampant - This is what happens when kithle and chalky get bored.

OOKaizer - I want to know how i ended up pink.

OOCharles - it beats fuschia

Scene zooms out to reveal the E.B.N.E.s paint-glued to the cieling.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-01-07, 08:17 AM		OOcat looks up at the other E.B.N.E.s.

OOcat: Which is why I stay the h*** away from card games.
rampant

03-01-07, 12:08 PM		OORampant - Oh come on!

the crew has started using the room the E.B.N.E.s arre stuck in as a garbage dump.

OORampant - Atleast put up some fly traps!
Paulon

03-01-07, 01:03 PM		OOPaulon (at a safe distance from the EBNE stickers: *winces* The saying is '"Be careful what you wish for, you might get it..." and with those two maniacs... giant venus fly traps anyone?
Charles Phipps

03-01-07, 05:59 PM		Epilogue to the Campaign of Dragons

Rose: Well we've ended the Dragon prophecy. Officially, now, the entire world is free to do what it wants without the Dragonatti manipulating them into action.

Ketler: WOW! BRELAND IDOL! You should see what Ex-King Boranal is saying about her performance!

Rose: Oh Gods, we're doomed.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

03-01-07, 06:43 PM		(OOC So, Im curious, did we just dodge a bullette, or jump a shark? :rimshot: )
Charles Phipps

03-01-07, 06:45 PM		That depends if we resort to cheap jokes from that point on.

NEXT PLOT! SARAH IS DEFEATED BY HER ARCHNEMESIS!

Sarah: Gah! Dog Catcher Jacob Hunter!

*is caught in a +5 net of wolf girl binding*

Jacob Hunter: This is what you get for being without a collar.
urial angel of death

03-01-07, 06:56 PM		OOKazier: What's that? I can't hear you over the sound of me taking out another 1000 Life Points with Stealth Birds repeatable Special Ability.


Damnation

A black ball of nothing decends from the sky and sucks up all the cards.

OOUrial: Bow down to the superior card game.

OOC: On a related note, I believe Twilight Princess's development process went something like this.

Japanese guy is sitting in a room. A beam of light comes down from heaven.

Guy: Thanks Big G
Charles Phipps

03-01-07, 06:58 PM		Pet Shop

Sarah: Sigh.

Terra: Since we lost your sister, let's go buy ourselves a new wolfgirl!

Sarah: Mom!

Elina: Hey! There's a cute wolfgirl.

Mithis the redheaded wolfgirl: BARK!

Terra: I love her!

*Terra picks up Mithis and walks out of the pet store with her while Elina tags along*

Sarah::weep:
Kaizer_Ryu

03-01-07, 07:01 PM		OOC: Hooray! Charles used my overly adorable character!

:D

Her brother may be less than happy about it, though.

And urial: You're just mad because you kept losing. :P :D
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-01-07, 07:07 PM		13: *harmonica solo*

Sarah: Quit doing that! :mad:

Suddenly a very handsome man with canineish features and a bit of a look of Krozen about him comes burst through the door.

Sarah: Uncle Weylin!

He is quickly followed by Erk, NJ26, Lucky, and Mr. T. They create a diversion using various pet-care supplies fashioned into a fog machine while Weylin grabs Sarah and dashes for the exit.

Sarah: I haven't seen you in years.

Weylin: Mostly because your E.B.N.E. needed to age you. :rolleyes:
DragoonDarkfire

03-01-07, 07:11 PM		Optamis: so what about the whole kidnapped thing?

Marik: we'll do it when we're not lazy.

Optamis: and when are you not lazy?

Buckrill: when is Boranel not an idiot?

Optamis: oh.

(MEANWHILE. In another universe, a parallel Eberron that is, for some reason, exactly like this one save for a definite lack of the Forgotten Freedom [making it a very lonely and sad place indeed], a single Warlock and Knight travel through the Jungles of Xen'drik)

Warlock: So where is it we're going again?

Knight: ancient giant myth states that deep within the center of this land exists a Temple of No return.

Warlock: why is it called that?

Knight: DUH because no one has returned from it.

Warlock: right.

Knight: any who. Seeing as how we're adventurers and have all that cool crap about us. I decided to investigate this Temple of No return and discovered it's ultimate secret.

Warlock: and that is?

Knight: It carries in it the ARMOR OF INVISIBILITY!

Warlock: ... I have TWO questions.

Knight: shoot bud.

Warlock: I'm NOT your bud. Any who, Question 1: Xen'drik is the land of the giants right? Wouldn't any weapons or armor we find be far too big for us to wear or even possibly carry?

Knight: eh. I'm good at lifting stuff.

Warlock: Question 2: If no one has returned from this Temple then how does anyone know what's inside it?

Knight: ... THAT'S THE MOST ILLOGICAL THING YOU'VE EVER SAID! How dare you question the grounds of our informant.

Warlock: and who is this informant?

Knight: a gnome.

Warlock: ... by Khyber itself I hate you.

Knight: well look. Let's just keep looking and-

Warlock: You don't get it do you? Xen'drik is practically INFAMOUS for it's curse. Anyone who comes here couldn't fine a stick to shake the absolute NOTHINGNESS at. That isn't even telling about the mass of MONSTERS that roam these places.

Knight: Well gee Warlock what do you suggest we do?

Warlock: we have to think.

Knight: I like lances.

Warlock: correction. I must think.

(after a moment of pacing, Warlock stops and leans against a rock)

Warlock: well I can't think of-

(The rock moves revealing itself to be a hill giant)

Warlock: ...

Hill Giant: TINY MEN! MUST SQUISH!

Knight: HAI MISTER GIANT! DO YOU KNOW WHERE THE TEMPLE OF-

(the Knight gets flattened by huge club)

Knight: ouch.

(The giant lifts up it's club)

Knight: HELP ME WARLOCK!

(Warlock is nowhere to be seen)

Knight: ... THANK THE HOST! He's gone to find HELP!

(shows Warlock running through the Jungle at the speed of sound)

Warlock: well it's too bad about 'old whats-his-face. Time to find a new meat shield.

(from the treetops we see an elf spying on Warlock with a spyglass)

Elf: hmmm... what have we here?

(as Warlock is running he is tripped by an outstretched foot and lands on his face. The elf jumps out the bushes knife in hand)

Elf: YOUR CROWNS OR YOU GET CROWNED!

Warlock: ... that sucked.

(back at Knight and the giant)

Knight: ALRIGHT GIANT! PREPARE FOR MY ULTIMATE MANEUVER!

(the giant rears up it's club to strike down but Knight disappears in a flash)

Giant: ... what?... HEY!

(Warlock it getting up at the point of the Elfs dagger)

Warlock: nice dagger you have...

(Warlock pulls out his own and clashes with the elf)

Warlock: BUT I LIKE MINE BETTER!

(the elf flicks his wrist and Warlock's dagger goes flying into a nearby tree)

Elf: oh. Too bad.

Warlock: awww crap.

(Knight goes running out of the bushes and grabs Warlock, the two go running away)

Elf: what the-

(a shadow appears over him)

Elf: that's odd. The Spell-Thieves guide to Lunar Orbit doesn't say anything about a total eclipse of the su-

(gets stepped on by giant)

Elf: is there a Jorasco enclave anywhere nearby?
Charles Phipps

03-01-07, 07:58 PM		I wonder how often 8bit has been parodied here.

:-)

Many times because it is awesome.

IC:

Sarah: Free at last! Won't my mother be happy to see me!

*Terra is snuggling Mithas*

Sarah: Mom! I'm back!

Terra: That's nice dear. Take out the trash

Sarah::weep:
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-01-07, 08:10 PM		OOC: Hey, mine was pretty original (so's DragonDark's): Nalfein destroyed the forest before he had put up with the adventure.
IC:
Sarah: :weep: Why won't mom pay attention to me?

Weylin: She's in delayed shock over the death of my sister. She's compensating by not recognizing people so that she won't know that Lisa isn't there.

Sarah: Is there anything I can do?

Weylin: I wish I could tell you, but my father killed my mother and then locked me away for years because he was ashamed of me. Plus I spent most of the time as a wolf. I didn't really get a childhood.

Sarah: Waaaaaaaaaahh!!!

Weylin: :thinks: (ihh Come on, Weylin, you've been smart enough not to lash out at the world after what Krozen did to you, think of something!)

Invisibly 13 can be seen opening Weylin's head and inserting new information via the process of rearranging some mental furnature.

Weylin: :lightbulb We could always go chew on Charles's hands.

Sarah: *sniff* Why his hands?

Weylin: So he can't type. :devil:

Sarah: :blink:……:devil:
Charles Phipps

03-01-07, 08:36 PM		Sarah: Chomp!

Charles: AWwwwww! Look Mithis is playing with her ball!

Sarah: I'm BITING YOU HERE!

;-)

OOC: Good stuff Silvermooncat.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-01-07, 09:59 PM		Weylin: Ok, I am entirely creeped out right now.

Sarah: It's not so bad.

The two stand amid Terra's collection of Lisa-owned objects she has turned into a virtual shrine.

Weylin: I guess I should be glad it's G-rated...

Sarah: Uh...

Weylin: :doh: Why am I not surprised? :waits: Now how do you know about that, young lady?

Sarah: :blush: It's not what you think! It's not like I went looking for it, I just have an awesome Search Check.
Charles Phipps

03-01-07, 10:08 PM		Great, now she's a porn dog in addition to being a drug dog.

Sarah: I AM NOT A DRUG DOG!

Weylin: well at least Rose is coping well with his wife's loss

Rose: I've become a badass emotionless assassin who accepts incredibly lucrative contracts to kill high profile targets while having nothing but meaningless sex with prostitutes.

Weylin: ....

Rose: Yes, I am Golgo 14. *stares at the screen*
rampant

03-01-07, 11:09 PM		Micheal - Wow, my old job.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-02-07, 01:36 AM		*exciting music begins playing*

Nina: It's happy!

Admiral Wolverine Lightningbolt: It's fun!

Myrr: It's Happy Fun Ball!

Troy MacClure: Yes, it's Happy Fun Ball, the toy sensation that's sweeping the Nations! Only 15 SP at participating stores! Get one today!

Reman: *softly and quietly in the background as music plays loudly to scenes of the kids having vast amounts of fun*

Warning: Pregnant women, the elderly, and children should avoid prolonged exposure to Happy Fun Ball.

Caution: Happy Fun Ball may suddenly accelerate to dangerous speeds.

Happy Fun Ball contains a liquid core, which if exposed due to rupture
should not be touched, inhaled, or looked at.

Do not use Happy Fun Ball on concrete.

Discontinue use of Happy Fun Ball if any of the following occurs: Itching, vertigo, dizziness, tingling in extremities, loss of balance or coordination, slurred speech, temporary blindness, profuse sweating or heart palpitations.

If Happy Fun Ball begins to smoke, get away immediately. Seek shelter
and cover head.

Happy Fun Ball may stick to certain types of skin.

When not in use, Happy Fun Ball should be returned to its special container
and kept under refrigeration.

Failure to do so relieves the makers of Happy Fun Ball, Magnificent Bastards, Inc, and its parent company, Bad Luck Unlimited, of any and all liability.

Ingredients of Happy Fun Ball include an unknown glowing substance which
fell to Eberron, presumably from outer space.

Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball.

Happy Fun Ball comes with a lifetime guarantee.

Troy MacClure: Happy Fun Ball! Accept no substitutes!
rampant

03-02-07, 01:48 AM		Tirmek - (pathing) Can we go now, Tellowas and Sagas keep trying to look up my skirt.

Sarah - ... :twitch: Excuse me

--------------------------
Two seconds later

Sagas - The wolf-girl is strong.

Tellowas - Do not ogle her girlfriend.

Scene zooms out (yes i like that effect alot) show the two teens tied into a very small prezel.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-02-07, 09:01 AM		Weylin: Maybe I came here at a bad time.

Sarah: No! I need quality role-models!
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-02-07, 02:30 PM		As Sithis travels down the corriodor, the happy fun ball rolls infront of him.

Sithis:... its a ball.

it begins to give off smoke.

Sithis: *begins backing away* Ooookkkkaaayyyy

It then Glows a bright red.

Sithis: What the-

BOOOOOOOMMMM!!!
Charles Phipps

03-02-07, 03:11 PM		Elina: Hey look! A bag of sugar!

*Elina sniffs it*

Sarah: Oooo nifty!

*Sarah sniffs it too*

*the two girls have white powder on their nose*

Rose: Elina! Stay out of the sugar! You'll ruin your appetite.

Elina: Hai!

Rose: Sarah, stop doing cocaine.

Sarah: Wha?
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-02-07, 03:33 PM		Rose: Elina! Stay out of the sugar! You'll ruin your appetite.
………
Rose: Sarah, stop doing cocaine.
Sarah: You see what I have to contend with?

Weylin: Aren't you immune to poison?

Sarah: What's that supposed to mean?

Weylin: Well, aren't drugs a type of poison? And therefore you'd be immune to them?

Sarah: Why didn't anyone think of this before?

Weylin: I think it's Caralot's dimsenion. Forces you to think smarter to keep up with their level of dumb.
Charles Phipps

03-02-07, 03:36 PM		HBO'S BEHIND THE MADNESS

Lilly: *smoking a cigarette* Yeah, the sucess really got to everyone after the Fifth Season with the new cast.

Narrator: And the rumors of you and Sarah?

Lilly: My divorce settlement with Elina forbids me of talking about my relationship with Sarah. Still, she is a wild girl.

***

Sarah: The fame was like a drug. But was also like a drug were the drugs.

Narrator: What was the biggest problem of the season?

Sarah: Well, when Tirmek became a girl it wasn't so bad. Then I discovered she was a real b***.

Narrator: I understand you're in rehab now?

Sarah: I knew I had a problem when I wrapped Kitten in a Dream Lilly leaf and tried to smoke her.
Crystalforged

03-02-07, 03:51 PM		In Caralot's Dimension.

Kitten: So, Grandpa, I was wondering about something. We don't have any of these people running around around trying to fight crime wearing tights with their underwear on the outside back home, well, I suppose there are a few on the FF but thats beside the point. Anyway, I was wondering how the whole thing started in this dimension.

Bruce: Ah, thats a good question and it has a long history behind it. It actually started several hundred years ago. This group of interdimensional travelers arrived here through a rift in time and space rather violently in the middle of Sharn. The city council approached them and they freely recounted their tale. They told a story of how they had been gathered from multiple dimensions on to a single ship of chaos by omnipotent entities beyond comprehension for some unknown reason. Not all was well there however for they were hunted mercilessly by an incredibly powerful woman.

Kitten: Wow, that can't be good.

Bruce: Yes, to try to save themselves they constructed a plan, apparently this woman, the deicide they called her, was dependant on this unique form of chili. So they banded together and took the ships cookie, the only individual with knowledge of how to make this chili and held the recipe ransom for their very lives. The plan failed however and the deicide unmade the demiplane in which they had made their base. They did not die however, they were left floating in the void between dimensions until finally they managed to open a rift into this dimension.

Kitten: Wait a sec, that sounds kinda familiar...

Bruce: So then with no way home they all decided to set up shop here and fight crime. Of course these original heros all passed away years ago but newer generations were inspired by them to take up the mantle when they were gone. That is how todays hero's came to be.

Kitten: :nonono: You're not telling me that...

Bruce: Oh, I almost forgot one thing. The odd thing about them was that they all had the world "Jarlot" in their names. Called themselves the "Jarlot League" in fact.

Kitten: :doh: I knew it. To tell the truth it explains a lot.
Charles Phipps

03-02-07, 03:58 PM		Hahahaha, great post Crystal Forged.

All we need is a superhero Icon to give you one.

;-)
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-02-07, 04:31 PM		Great Big Crimefighter Computer: Incoming Call.

Bruce: Finally.

Kitten: You can say that again. :mad:

The image of a wrinkled old elf lady with green scales appears on the screen wearing pointy glasses draping a plastic rhinestone string around the back of the head .

Kitten: That's Vol? She doesn't even look dead.

Vol: Thank you, deary. I've aged well.

Bruce (muttered): You've aged, certainly.

Vol: Ah, Bruce, so nice to see you again.

Bruce: *strikes a heroic pose, hands on hips, chest thrust out* Cut the phony courtesy call, d'Vol. We know you're up to some plan to take over the world.

Kitten: Nice to see you taking this seriously.

Vol: Oh, my my, you don't mess around, do you, Bruce? Well, if you insist…

My demands are simple: the world turns over all power to the Villain League, or we shall unleash our PsychoSpringulator.

Princess Sara (background): Laaaaaaame.

Bruce: And what does this fiendish device do?

Vol: No fiends were involved: their union is too good. No, this is just one of my simple devices. Just makes everyone unshielded into guests from the Kanatash Springer Show.

Bruce: EGADS! You heartless monster! (pause) Even the Galan family?

Vol: Especially the Galan family.

Bruce: That is low. That is psychoitc. That is—

Vol: :bored: A lot better then any of the other plans, I can assure you.

Bruce: You won't get away with this! :rant:

Vol: Oh, and you're going to stop me? Well then, you'll need to come by our HQ under the Pholly Coporation's main office on Argonessen.

Bruce: :uh-huh: Don't their building have a tendancy to………explode?

Vol: *sigh* :nonono: We're on a tight budget this month. Well see you then.

Bruce: Oh you can rest assured, Vol, that I will pursue you—(transmission cuts out)—:bored: Okay, who's up for "The Exploits of Roy Mustang"?

Kitten: A movie? You're going to watch a movie right now, when there are villains threatening to turn the world into The Planet of the Psychos?

Bruce: You heard her, they're on a tight budget. They'll appreciate the extra time to set up.

Kitten: But what about the Psycho-whatever?

Johnny: Chill, fellow aberrant dudett. All is still right with the world.

Roosevelt: Did you ever stop to think how they'd manage to find so many weirdoes if they weren't as common as elven sub-races?

Puck: Heck, it's why the world is entertaining.

Kitten: But……they threatened—

Bruce: Kid, you have to realize that most people don't really take a good look around. They don't see how stupid they are because they don't want to admit it. So you can threaten to make them morons all you want and they'll never call your bluff.

Kitten: :twitch:
********
Later, while everyone else watches "The Exploits of Roy Mustang (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ku02_ht7fgw&mode=related&search=)", Kitten fiddles with the controls of the Great Big Crimefight Computer.

Kitten: I'll show them. :mad: I'll show them all how a real hero—a GOOD hero, a TRUE champion of justice, handles things……
Kaizer_Ryu

03-02-07, 04:32 PM		Momo: Ah, there you are! How'd it go?

Shroedigger: *meaningful pose*

Momo: :cloud9: So...bishie...

Becoming God: As should be evident by his distant yet reassuring demeanor, our training montage was a complete success! We now have mad street cred.

Momo: :bored:

Becoming God: Ok, so we won only because every other contestant and most of the audience died when my shoe flew off and hit the chandelier, but it still counts!

Momo: *sigh* Oh, before I forget, I was rummaging through the piles of junk your followers keep bringing and found this. *presses play on a conveniently placed displayscreen with VCR*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_gZDlK5JeE

Becoming God: That's from my early Sarlonian days! I haven't seen that in years. :D

Shroedigger: :twitch:
rampant

03-02-07, 08:42 PM		Corre - aaaah its good to be back

Reshalin - Oh not you again!

Corre - Try asking for a private room instead of a single.

Reshalin - You and you're accursed semantics.
Charles Phipps

03-02-07, 09:26 PM		Sarah's bedroom

*Sarah sits snuggly in her bed with her Tirmek Plushie*

Sarah: Mmmm warm and cozy for the Winter months.

Quistis: Well since Rose became Captain again because his duties include actual work, it's been rather quiet.

Sarah: Everyone's too busy rebuilding. Mom hasn't been on the new ship at all. She just spends her time in Wolf form or at Mom's cottage in Thrane.

Quistis: Well we'll go visit her soon.

*Her auntie tucks her in*

Sarah: It's okay. She just needs time to cope. Terra was lonely for a long time. She can't go back to it I think.

Quistis: Well she's a wonderful person, abet....an infamous one.

Sarah: How is Elina doing?

Quistis: It's too early for her to return to Ninja training. She's still coping with everything.

Sarah: Yeah, her reaction to finding out Lilly is engaged to Princess Sarah's younger sister was not good.

Quistis: I think she's a bit stunned that others could find Lilly attractive.

Sarah: He's a sporty stupid dude. They're too dumb realize that they're unattractive. That generates cool.

Quistis: In any case, I'll be here for you no matter what.

*Sarah wagged her tail as she snuggled her teacher*

Sarah: Gomon Sensei!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-02-07, 09:45 PM		OOC: Charles, that made no sense, and not in the good way: you need to make clear which Sarah we're talking about when each is brought up.
Charles Phipps

03-02-07, 09:59 PM		OOC: Whoops.

Fixed.
rampant

03-02-07, 10:47 PM		Tirmek - Ok I declare this engagement oficially nulled.

Princess Sarah's little sister - What righ have you-

Tirmek - Oh shut up, I'm sick of Elina being all angsty, she gets mean when she's depressed. MARCH PALADIN BOY! *lifts up lily by the neck of hi shirt*

Lily - WOULD SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!

P.S.L.S. - We're engaged honey muffin.

Lily - WHO THE DUES ARE YOU! *tries to leap back from the girl*

Tirmek - :woot: resisting arrest! *smack* *beat* *hit* *police brutality* *night clubbing*
urial angel of death

03-02-07, 11:42 PM		Kerrith: *holding flowers, candies, and huge amounts of jewels* You know if Lilly fails to show I could always be a replacement. :D

Tirmek: Why would she want you?

Kerrith: I've been conditioned from birth to be a slave to women, and *poof of magic* I too can turn into a girl

Tirmek: Gah! My eyes!

OOC: Getting your teeth ripped horizontally out is not fun. That's why I've been missing. Also if my post don't make sense it's probably because of the after surgery drugs.
rampant

03-03-07, 12:04 AM		OORampant - Since when did anyything here make sense?
rampant

03-03-07, 03:02 AM		Teiza - Sensei!

Terra - What is it Teiza?

Teiza - Defend yourself!

Several darkmasses surge forth from terra's own shadow and strike at her.

Terra - (i.h.h. shadow elementals! this is the mystery Army of Shadow!)

Teiza spreads her crystal wings and the already dark room is devoid of all light.

Terra - (i.h.h. how is she hampering my vision, i should be able to see here regardless of the light ... unless) oof

The darkness surrounding Terra is not the abscence of light, but the prescence of Teiza's elementals and her midnight crystal wings, all of which are composed of darkness. So register as darkness.

Terra - (i.h.h. clever girl she's using my own powers of perception against me) *dispell*

Teiza - (mid-pounce with crystal wings spread and twisted forward in wicked blades) Oh dammit!:(

Terra - :) nice try

A doppleganger, or is it the real one, materializes behind Teiza and grabs the girls tails.

Terra - (holding Teiza upside down) ... I-
------------------------------------------------

Kaizer?
Kaizer_Ryu

03-03-07, 03:48 AM		Terra - (holding Teiza upside down) ... I-Terra: -needed that. Thank you.

Teiza: :D

Terra: That was quite impressive. :) I am able to see shadow itself, but creatures of shadow are as opaque to my eyes as anything here. Finding that loophole is no small feat. *to herself* ...I wonder...

Teiza: Sensei?

Terra: Yes?

Teiza: Can you put me down?

Terra: Oh, certainly. *does so* (i.h.h.) Is it too soon? She's made incredible progress, and yet she's still young and impulsive...

Teiza: Now that things are fairly settled down, are we gonna start lessons regularly again?

Terra: Hmmmm...

Teiza: C'mon, please? :bigeyes:

Terra: (i.h.h.: I still can't decide if that look is cute or creepy coming from her.) Oh, don't worry. I'm not backing out. I've just been thinking of what to do next.

Her face becomes quite serious as she reaches a decision.

Terra: Teiza...I want you here tomorrow at noon. Bring no weapons, armor, or anything else save your normal clothes. Prepare no spells, either.

The oddity of the request and the tone of Terra's voice throws Teiza a bit, but she knows her Sensei has her reasons.

Teiza: Can I ask why?

Terra: You will see. ;)

OOC: More tomorrow. Soooooooo tired... :zzz:
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-03-07, 07:53 AM		OOC: More tomorrow. Soooooooo tired... :zzz:
OOC: Tiredness is for weak :zzz:

OOcat: Only E.B.N.E. that gets tired by having dreams.

Bunny: I'm surprised that King Steve managed to hang on to a woman long enough to have a little sister for Princess Sarah.

Silver: Yeah, me too.

Everyone else: :blink:
fiendish_platypus

03-03-07, 10:56 AM		What is the forgotten freedom? seriously,I don't know what it is, but it sounds pretty neat
urial angel of death

03-03-07, 11:44 AM		OOC: Sorry but I'm no good at explaining. Partially because my thought process is more inward focused and partially because I'm doped up on pain-killers, after a recent surgery.

Time for a new plot-line.

IC: Somewhere deep in a mess of gears, fire, and metal; a charismatice looking red-skinned man in a black suit leaps to his feet. Behind him are three cloaked individuals, who are chained to the floor by their arms. The man makes a few quick gestures and his voice becomes amplified so that it can be heard for miles yet keep its normal volume.

Man: Attention everyone, the boundaries to a new material plane have weakened! Fire upper the meat-grinders, prepare the floating worlds, increase production on the living dungeons, and rouse the brute squads.

An enormous mechanical creature made from various miss-matched parts approaches the man.

Creature: Govenor-General Lucian, wouldn't it be wise to ready the regular army before preparing the special units?

Lucian: ... Yes I guess that would be prudent. Prepare the army as well.

OOC: Kaizer don't let Rei read this.

Also I will be getting back to way-far future shortly.
Charles Phipps

03-03-07, 11:55 AM		OOC: In a nutshell, it's a freeform play by post with strong humorous/parody plotlines with the occasional serious plotline set in a unique Eberron campaign interpretation. It takes place on a Pirate Airship.
fiendish_platypus

03-03-07, 12:02 PM		OOC: In a nutshell, it's a freeform play by post with strong humorous/parody plotlines with the occasional serious plotline set in a unique Eberron campaign interpretation. It takes place on a Pirate Airship.

sweet, can anyone just start playing???
rampant

03-03-07, 12:34 PM		OOC: They let me play.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-03-07, 01:01 PM		OOC: We have a Wiki (http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Main_Page) to get you started. It's updated when we get to it, but it's a start. Just so you know, most characters are no-touchy as far as development of their personalities. Like any D&D game, you have control of your character(s), but no one elses.

I highly suggest reading at least the last 5-10 pages to get a general idea of what's been going on, too. Go ahead and create your character and join in, we're always looking for fresh me-...er, new blood :shifty: . If you're unsure about something, be it plot, charcters, etc. PM's are always welcome.
fiendish_platypus

03-03-07, 01:07 PM		maybe it's just because I'm a stupid idiot, but I still don't get it, do I post my character??? or do I just start playing???
feel free to insult me because I'm stupid if this is really obvious
rampant

03-03-07, 01:10 PM		Both, post a quick intro and and some basic stuff like race/class and a rough estimate of power level and capability. Then do their intro scene on the FF
Charles Phipps

03-03-07, 01:10 PM		No problem.

Actually, just do a write up of your character and a simple matter of them coming onboard. Since we're between plots right now then we'll gladly have the characters welcome you on board.

If your character is confused as to what the hell is happening then that's normal

;-)
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-03-07, 01:18 PM		OOC: And to be a***-retentive, remember that this isn't a game, this is a story, and mostly anything goes. Feel free to drag your character through things that would normally kill them but they only get cartoon-style damaged. Post characters that would be insanely powerful in the real game but here are hampered by such things as their spouse, their own incompetance, your incompetance. They can come from anywhere or any time, be even from another game system. Really, other than no-touchy you can do whatever you want.

Also, if you see OO followed by the name of the poster that means they are acting as a character in the story. That shows you how freeform this is.
fiendish_platypus

03-03-07, 01:19 PM		OOC: I hope this is right...

IC: Desmon d'Sivis, the abberant blackguard walked onto the ship like he owned the place. His onyx armor shined in the midday sun. Scribble flew just above his head. (Scribble is a flying dire platypus that has random templates depending on his mood, he acquired this in the mournland)

OOC: Is that good???
Kaizer_Ryu

03-03-07, 01:30 PM		OOC: Pretty much, but a quick synopsis of his class(es), level, race (I assume Gnome, but the abberant mark has me curious, Ketler d'Cannith is half-Gnome with a Mark of Chibi ;) ) would be helpful. Something in this format:

Name:

Race/Gender:

Class/Level:

Brief description of the character, such as any noticable features (like the Mark or the Dire Platypus that's following him). If you want to give regular physical features like hair/eye color, go ahead, but it's not important. A general idea of personality also helps us in using him the way you see him. The comment about him walking on board like he owns the place is a good start.
fiendish_platypus

03-03-07, 01:40 PM		Name: Desmon d'Sivis
Race/Gender: Male permanently reduced weresquirrel whisper gnome
Class/Level: Ex-paliden 10/Blackguard 10 (a little too straightforward for my liking but I don't wanna look thorough all my books right now)

Desmon is about 2'00", he has a mark around his left eye that looks oddly like a smiley face. His Small-sized greatsword is made of onyx and he is clad in cumbersome onyx armor. Desmon thinks he is better than everyone else, save his invisible, sexy lover, Lyana. Lyana rides Scribble, a flying dire platypus that seems different every time you look at him, and often gains strange powers that help or hinder Desmon.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-03-07, 02:07 PM		OOC: Fits completely.

OOcat: Better than a lot of the other characters around here.

OOC: I should mention that certain of my characters can read OOC.

OOcat: More like this slacker is written by its characters.
Charles Phipps

03-03-07, 02:08 PM		Elina: Well it's okay, Lilly has pined for me forever Tirmek. It's not like this Little Sister of Princess Sara can be any more fun than me.

Princess Nelia: Hello everyone! I'm Lilly's bethrothed!

Elina: Uh huh.

Princess Nelia: I'm collecting money for the Sharn's Monster Stomp Orphans fund for my Girl Paladin's Troop!

Elina: :twitch:

Princess Nelia: My interests are fluffy things, unicorns, being rescued by knights whom are just a tad underdeveloped physically, and waving my moon wand!

Elina: Uhhhh...

Princess Nelia: I'm truly in love with Lilly and will never ever betray him.

Elina: Right.

Princess Nelia: Of course, I'm a bit dependent since he's so much more wiser than me.

Elina: :blink:

Princess Nelia: Tooda Loo!

*Nelia walks in front of a rake that slams her in the face*

Princess Nelia: Doh!

*she's bleeding*

Tirmek: Oh My God, there's a female Lilly.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-03-07, 02:20 PM		Tirmek: Oh My God, there's a female Lilly.
Bunny: That……………brings up the disturbing question of how closely related the Galans are to King Steve.

Princess Sarah: Aw h*ll no!
fiendish_platypus

03-03-07, 02:22 PM		Desmon: yah, I know Lyana
...pause...
Desmon: whats that? It's not what I expected either
Desmon (hears moans): whats that noise? (looks up to see zombie Scribble) I don't think Scribble's in the greatest mood either, honey. I'm going to go look around, try to keep Scribble from eating anyone.
rampant

03-03-07, 02:40 PM		OOC: Actually scribble might be on the other end of that.
-----------------------------------------------------------

Chalky - Is that a cousin of yours? (roasting squishy over an open flame)

Squishy - (spitting acid on the strings tying him to the spit) It does bear a strong resmblance to uncle Fred. *Escapes*

Chalky - Oh well, lets try this with someone who's not so adept at dodging me.
-----------------------------------------

Scribble - {insert Platypus noise}

Desmon - Whats got him so riled up?
------------------------------------------------

Squishy - (washing the butter mango sauce off) I'f I'm lucky that sap will keep that deranged changeling off my case for a bit.
fiendish_platypus

03-03-07, 02:47 PM		Desmon: Holy poo! Neogi! Is that even allowed on an airship??? Mark of Happy, fix it! (slaps his left eye repedetly)
Scribble: (dead platypus noise)
Desmon: ah snap, I think my dragonmark broke again
DragoonDarkfire

03-03-07, 02:52 PM		OCC: And now back to the epic adventures of the Luminous Adventurers... BTW: there's a Platypus shifter called Buckrill on the ship ;)

(Knight and Warlock are hiding behind a tree)

Knight: WHAT DO WE DO!?

Warlock:(while reading Monster Manual) let's see... if the giant doesn't have anymore then 18 HD... and without any templates... and doesn't have any artifact power items... then it should be a challenge rating 15.

Knight: gee that's ALL!? WE'RE GOING TO DIE!

Warlock: relax. I got an idea. Just distract it for me.

Knight: ALRIGHT!

(Knight runs out toward the giant with lance in hand)

Knight: FACE MY LANCE EVIL GI-

(Knight gets crushed by club)

Knight: (in pain) ... ant...

Warlock:(while reading book of vile darkness) hmmm...

Knight: ARGH! HELP!

Warlock: Angle Slayer eh?

Knight: OH THE HOST SAVE ME!

Warlock: Sacrifice souls for power?

Knight: THE SILVER FLAME!? VOL!? UNDYING COURT!? THE FREAKING DRAGON BELOW!? XENU!?

Warlock: WILL YOU STOP THAT!? I'M TRYING TO READ!

(Knight lands horribly beaten in front of Warlock)

Knight: ... the dishonor... I will never enter Valhalla...

Warlock: knock it off. Fine. I'll handle this.

(Warlock moves out from tree to fact the hill giant)

Warlock: HEY FUGLY!

(giant raises club to strike, Warlock holds up hands and starts to charge)

Warlock: ELDERITCH BLAST!

(the giant explodes in a horribly devastating explosion that takes out a chunk of the jungle)

Knight: ... overkill?

Warlock: screw you. I killed the giant didn't I?

Knight: THE FREAKING FOREST IS GONE!

Warlock: it's still dead isn't it?

Knight: we'll never find the armor of invisibility now...

Warlock: you idiot. There WAS no armor of invisibility.

Knight: why would a gnome lie to us?

Warlock: think about that for a second...

(a few minuets pass)

Knight: ... no seriously. Why would a gnome lie to us?

Warlock: that's it. We're going back to Sharn. NOW!

(Warlock walks off with Knight following him. It cuts to a tree near the border of destruction and Spell-Thief jumps down from the tree)

Spell-Thief: hmmm. It didn't say anything about random explosions either...
fiendish_platypus

03-03-07, 03:21 PM		OOC: :blink: a shifter platypus :blink:
does anyone know where I can get a list of monster templates???
Desmon: this ship has a lot of wierdos, right? you think anyone here can fix dragonmarks?
...pause...
Desmon: ya, I know if you were still un-imaginary you could fix it, but your not.
...pause...
Desmon: you know what Lyana? SHUT UP!!!
rampant

03-03-07, 03:54 PM		Teiza - :D

Satnak - What has you so exited this morning dear?

Teiza - Sensei has something special in mind for class today!

Serene - Oh good I've been worried about her.

Dorvos - Speaking of class?

Satnak - Sorry your entrance exam is already scheduled, besides the whole point isn't what you can learn, this is a placement test my son. It is concerned only with what you know now.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-03-07, 04:14 PM		Silver: Son? Neato, another gender-swapper! Hey, Tirmek! You're going to be a role-model!

OOcat: Wow, this ship is so complicated that even the people who created them are mixing their chars up.
fiendish_platypus

03-03-07, 04:20 PM		Desmon (yelling): CAN ANYONE ON THIS SHIP FIX A DRAGONMARK???
Scribble slowly (and painfully looking) changed its features. Half-prismatic dragon flying dire platypus :D
rampant

03-03-07, 04:22 PM		Dorvos - I am not a girl dammit!

Elina - The fact that you shop for strapless tops says otherwise.

Dorvos - I have eyes on shoulders! I don't care how badass you people think it looks walking around with a blindfold on is stupid!

Elina - Then why do you get stuff from the girls' section?

Dorvos - ...because the rest of my family is female, why double the length of the trip for one person?

Elina - Sure :bored:

Dorvos - FINE! ... :shifty: ... my body is too narrow to fit anything in the boy's section that is long enough for me.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-03-07, 04:27 PM		OOC: Whoops, my bad: I'm kinda dizzy today. Makes it hard to read.

Silver: Although…………:devil:

Dorvos: I'm the child of two women already. How much weirder can you get?
fiendish_platypus

03-03-07, 04:30 PM		OOC: I have to go to karate now :monk:
I'll probably be back in about two hours
rampant

03-03-07, 04:48 PM		Tirmek - I really wish I could... Hey don't the houses have some way of marking especially troublesome excortiates or abberrants so the mark doesn't come back?

Sarah - That might work! Stupid death mark.
Crystalforged

03-03-07, 04:50 PM		OOCrystalforged: (going full incredible hulk) GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!

Kanatash: Oh, :censored:! Run for it people, he's completely lost it! He's going to kill us all!

OOCrystalhulk: (bearing down of Kanatash using Earl as a weapon after ripping him free of the ship) RHAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

Earl: HEY! PUT ME DOWN! This isn't covered by my warrenty!

OOCrystalhulk tosses Earl at Kanatash, but misses.

Earl: :censored: Not like that!

Kanatash: (backing away) Alright, nice entity, niiiiiiice entity. Just calm down. Don't do anything you might regret.

OOCrystalhulk glances to the east crosseyed and Sarlona suddenly explodes.

Kanatash: (looking in the direction of what was once Sarlona) Oooooookay. (turning to face OOCrystalhulk) Alright, I really didn't want to do this but you give me no choice. (pulls out DM Breaker and opens fire)

OOCrystalhulk: (only slightly injured) DAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! (swats Kanatash away with a backhand)

Kanatash: :censored:, that didn't stop him! Alright time to pull out all the stops.

Kanatash pulls out a small remote. It is labled "Space Based Orbital DM Breaker Cannon." He flips up the glass lid and presses the big red button. Moments later a beam of light descends from the heavens striking OOCrystalhulk. There is a long scream and when the light finally dimishes OOCrystalforged, now back to normal, sits in the bottom of a large crater.

Kanatash: (looking down at OOCrystalforged) Are you quite done?

OOCrystalforged: (grumbling) Yes.

Kanatash: Now, how about you fill in everyone else who is probably wondering what the **** is going on.

OOCrystalforged: Yeah, sure, fine. Well lets just say I'm dealing with "anger issues" at the moment. My parents have been planning on taking me on vacation down to the Florida Keys for spring break. I WAS supposed to be on a plane down there right now. However on friday night when I was starting the 5 hour drive home a blizzard swept in and the interstates were closed. I was forced to camp out in some town in the middle of nowhere overnight. Then in the morning they don't reopen the interstates until 10:00 and my flight leaves at 1:30 and I still have another 200 miles to go. So I take of down the interstate as fast as I dare with the crappy road conditions. Then I get a call saying the flight is delayed 20 minutes so I should just make it. Then when I finally get there, as I'm turning into the airport my car hits a patch of ice and slides into a snowdrift and gets stuck. My uncle is there though since he brought my parents down and says I he'll take care of the car so I run to the terminal. When I run in there its 1:15 when I get to the ticket counter but there's noone manning the counter. After a few minutes we finally manage to get a hold of some one and we find out THEY ALREADY GAVE AWAY MY SEAT. So now here I am, sitting at home, while my parents on on a flight to the keys.

Kanatash: There, thats better now don't you think?

OOCrystalforged: Not really, the only thing I'm thinking about right now is how to kill someone and not get caught. That and asking myself how much I really care if I get caught at this point.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-03-07, 05:14 PM		OOC: Based on what I've seen in popular fiction these days hearing about how someone else's life is worse is supposed to cheer you up. So here goes:

Try living every day feeling that you have no purpose, that you're in the completely wrong world for you, that there's nowhere you can go, no job you can do to make a living. You couldn't handle college because you have a short attention span, OCD, and a yearning to be free of everything. You sit every day in front of your computer hoping to think up something fun to write and the most you get out of yourself is a snarky post calling yourself an idiot. And there really isn't anything else you'd rather do, to the point that it's preferable to troll the internet for yet another webcomic that you can go to every day so that you can hopefully use up another second of a life you don't want to be living. You have no friends mainly because you have no idea how to make friends.

And to top it all off it infuriates you that people enjoy reading about people having these exact sorts of problems and yet it does not cause them the same level of discomfort that is causes you.

SilvercatMoonpaw: The above is in every swearable way true.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-03-07, 05:36 PM		does anyone know where I can get a list of monster templates???
OOC: Meh, we've made up more than a few as we go along. That's Silver's favorite hobby.

IC:

Terra: Ready?

Teiza: :mad: Do you have any idea how much it sucks not being able to sleep to pass the time?

Terra: :rolleyes: At least you're enthusiastic.

Teiza: What am I learning today?

Terra: This is less a lesson and more a test. Now give me your hand.

The moment she touches Terra's hand, the world goes completely dark. She feels a great deal of power surrounding her, as well as a great deal of life energy, but her eyes can see nothing. Well, almost nothing. Amid the eternal darkness of her surroundings, she can see what can only be described as shades of black.

Teiza: Where is this?

Terra: The same place we were before. I've merely opened your eyes to a new level of sight.

Teiza: This is what you see?

Terra: Part of it. I see normally, but overlay what you see here, and you're close. In a way, this is a different version of True Seeing. I cannot see what they look like normally, but their shadow signature is impossible to change without-

Teiza: -without altering their basic nature.

Terra: *chuckles* Right, you already knew about that. Now, I've told you before, but it bears repeating. What I am about to teach you is incredibly dangerous knowledge. Abused, it can cause irreperable damage.

Teiza: :bored: You sound like you don't trust me.

Terra: I'm just being careful. I've said the same thing to my own kids, and they have instincts that help guide them.

Teiza: Oh, fine.

Terra: There is one more thing you should know. The danger of this power has led me to place a kind of...restriction on it's use. Your Grandfather has run himself into the ground trying to figure out how to access this, but there is a simple way to do so he never thought of. (i.h.h. :evillaugh )

Teiza: :w00t: ness! You're taking me to the next level?!

Terra: Pass this, and yes.

Teiza: :dancin: ...ok, it's really odd doing my victory dance without being able to see it. But what's the catch?

Terra: I am it's master. Anyone can use unbound shadowmatter, but any that is infused into other things requires my permission. What does that sound like?

Teiza: :thinks: :lightbulb Praying for spells?

Terra: Exactly.

Teiza: Wouldn't worshipping you be more than a little strange?

Terra: On both sides, yes. It still weirds me out to think of anyone praying to me. But that's not really how it'd work. A Cleric gains spells merely by their faith in a diety or ideal. I believe you can gain this power by merely trusting me as your teacher. Terrek will beat his head against the wall when he figures out how easy it is. :devil:

Teiza: Why don't you like Grandpa?

Terra: Well...it's not that. I just find his endless arrogance annoying. It may be justified for the most part, but still...

OOC: More later.

And, dare I say it, SilvercatMoonpaw and I have quite a lot in common.

I do believe the universe is cracking at the seams now.
rampant

03-03-07, 05:40 PM		Teiza - You like to drive him batty?:D

Terra - Yes:)

Teiza - So does mother.

Terra - Does this have anything to do with why he's been muttering about coffee?

Teiza - Mother likes to slip him a special blend, based on the chili.
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-03-07, 06:08 PM		OOC:
Welcome aboard Fiendish Platapus

IC:

Sithis appears from the shadows next to Desmond. ( He's over five and a half foot higher, amusing)

Sithis: Although i dont pretend to be a master at dragonmarks i can at least try to help you.
Charles Phipps

03-03-07, 06:10 PM		OOC: My sympathies to my fellow players.

We're all friends here.
rampant

03-03-07, 06:22 PM		Desmon - No I'm not interested in joining Squirrels Against Rodentist Schoolboards.

Squirrel on a Soapbox - Squeaken squeak squeak

Desmon - No I don't care if Lower Deck Prep doesn't have a squirrel representitive.
fiendish_platypus

03-03-07, 06:32 PM		OOC: Hey, I'm back, just a stupid question, what's E.B.N.E???

IC:
Desmon: Okay, you can TRY to help, but I don't think anything you can do will work. The mark of happy only listens to Lyana and shes, well, imaginary, and not in a very good mood right now.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-03-07, 06:39 PM		OOC: My sympathies to my fellow players.

We're all friends here.OOC: Meh, I just go with it. Once I stopped caring about what everyone else expected of me (not actual responsibilities, mind you), things got easier. Doing little else but working to pay the bills and spending the rest of my time in 'pointless' endeavors is more rewarding than any "constructive use of my time" I've ever tried. :D I do believe I'm consistently happier now than at any other time in my life.

And I'm not exaggerating when I say my time spent here is a big part of it.

OOKaizer: *mockingly* :D Group hug! :P

Quiet you.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-03-07, 06:43 PM		Desmon: …………The mark of happy only listens to Lyana and shes, well, imaginary, and not in a very good mood right now.
OOcat: :bored: I think we found Ketler's long-lost half-brother.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-03-07, 06:47 PM		OOC: ……………………

OOKaizer: *mockingly* :D Group hug! :P

Quiet you.
OOcat: Look what sort of monster you've created. :mad:

OOC: Quit your whining.

That rant was more of a chance to mock you guys for all your dramatic storylines. I don't say you can't do them, I just think it's freaky.

And we all have to admit that a good rant makes us feel better.
rampant

03-03-07, 06:48 PM		OOrampant - either that or Pholly's

Kithle - gnome bombs anyone?
fiendish_platypus

03-03-07, 06:48 PM		OOcat: :bored: I think we found Ketler's long-lost half-brother.

OOC: whoes Ketler??? is it good to be his long lost half-brother???
Another stupid question, whats the OO mean???

IC:
Desmon: Scribble, try to cheer Lyana up, I'll give you a Scribble Snack

Scribble looks up from his absent-minded flying, apparently interested
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-03-07, 06:58 PM		OOC: whoes Ketler??? is it good to be his long lost half-brother???
OOC: Ketler's Wiki entry (http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Ketler). Essentially he's the resident animé-style perv.
Another stupid question, whats the OO mean???
Go back to post #4992. I explained it when you joined up.
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-03-07, 07:00 PM		OOC: its a means of identifying that we're using our entities (Us manifesting on eberron).
so, when i manifest, i appear as OOKale.

IC:
Sithis's hands crackle with dark energy.

Sithis: This might hurt, a lot, so prepare yourself.

Sithis Removes the glove on his right hand. to reveal the hand which had until a few weeks back bore the rotting curse. so far it's flesh has grown back, and the sores have vanished. but it still appears withered an dessicated.
The rune burnt into the plam glows with dark power as he kneels and places his hand on the gnomes forehead.
Desmon feels a chill run through his body as the hand touches him. within seconds Searing white hot agony lances through him.

OOC: fiendish_platypus, you can decide if it works or not.
Charles Phipps

03-03-07, 07:01 PM		Princess Nelia: La La La La la......

*An anvil misses her barely*

*Just to the side, Tirmek is nearby a rope that has just been cut by his sword*

Elina: Tirmek....

Tirmek: I'm sick of this romantic triangle stuff! Humans die all the time! This will free us up from any further problems with you and Lilly.

*Nelia walks up to Tirmek*

Princess Nelia: Hello Mister Kitty man!

Tirmek: Mister Kitty...man?

Princess Nelia: I thought I'd give everyone presents since we're all soon to be family!

*She gives Tirmek a pretty dress*

Tirmek: Errr...

Princess Nelia: NOW LET ME GIVE YOU A HUG!

Tirmek: GAH!
fiendish_platypus

03-03-07, 07:08 PM		Desmon: y'know, I think you just made Lyana more angry, great job, that hurt too. If you really wanna help go try and find something that'll cheer Lyana up, y'know what she likes? Hats. Of all the things an imaginary lover has to like it has to be hats!
rampant

03-03-07, 07:10 PM		OO{screenname} is a designation that means an E.B.N.E. ( rampant, charles phipps, Crystalforged, etc. ) is in what can be refered to as the "non-cannon zone" where they may interact with the crew or each other, little if anything done here affects the more dramatic storylines, and thus is mostly used for comedy.
fiendish_platypus

03-03-07, 07:15 PM		Desmon: does anyone hear have a hat they don't want, or a hat they do want but are willing to give away for the greater, well... not good?
rampant

03-03-07, 07:19 PM		Kithle - Here *plops a conical hat on Desmons head*

Desmon - Thanks

The hat reads : Dunce
It also has fast sealing glue on the inside.
fiendish_platypus

03-03-07, 07:23 PM		Desmon: well, I think you cheered Lyana up, but ummm, is this some magic hat, how do you get it off? do you speak a command word??? says wierd words from lots of different languages, well that's not working. Mark of Happy, fix it!
the hat plomps on the ground
Desmon: well the marks working now.
fiendish_platypus

03-03-07, 07:57 PM		Desmon: HOLY FUDGE, A SPIDER!!!
smacks spider
OOPLatypus: umm, hey little dude, I think you gained a level
Desmon: SWEET!!!
OOPlatypus: So, uh, watcha going to go into now? you already have full levels in black guard.
Desmon: hmm, you're right, maybe you can try and convince the DM to let me be a dragonmarked heir type-thing only abberant?
OOPlatypus: How about no?
Desmon: okaaay, how about a level of assassin? DEATH ATTACK!
OOPlatypus: you were mountain plate you stupid gnome
Desmon: Snap, you're right, oh one sec, Lyana's sayin' something
...pause...
Desmon: Lyana wants me to be a cleric
OOPlatypus: Okay, who's going to be your diety
...pause...
Desmon: Lyana says she'll be my diety
OOPlatypus: umm, strange, but sure, what domains are you going to get
Desmon: o, o, the one with the ability to make my imaginary lover real for an amount of time, and the one that let's me have more than one imaginary friend
...pause...
Desmon: oh ya, you're right, that's a prestige class, hmm, what's the prerequisites? complete wacko domain? gotcha, I'm going to get that prestige class next level
OOPlatypus: whatever
OOC: please note that Desmon is now Ex-paliden10/Blackguard10/Cleric of Lyana1
BTW, did I use that OO thingy right???
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-03-07, 09:47 PM		OOC: please note that Desmon is now Ex-paliden10/Blackguard10/Cleric of Lyana1
BTW, did I use that OO thingy right???
OOC: Exact character levels/power doesn't matter. In fact, sometimes it's more fun if you only have a vague idea of what they can do.

And yes, you use OO-speach correctly.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-03-07, 10:05 PM		OOC: Exact character levels/power doesn't matter. In fact, sometimes it's more fun if you only have a vague idea of what they can do.

And yes, you use OO-speach correctly.
To clarify, the request for levels was more to give us a general idea of capabilities. Unlike a normal campaign, mechanics only come into play as far as personality and role in any plots. No one's going to say anything if Desmon does something in the name of humor that is entirely out of character with his class.

To sum up: Classes/levels are more guidelines than actual rules. :D

Ghost of Jarlot: Show some respect for the dead and stop quoting my movie!
rampant

03-03-07, 10:19 PM		Teiza - What's taking so long.

Terra - My entity is a bum.

Teiza - Mine's worse do you know how long he's been rattling around the Corre gradutes plot, I want my sister back you bloody wanker!

OORampant - Listen that plot won't make sense until the time line progresses so I'm leaving it alone unless I think of more humorous school based pop-references.

Teiza - You call a wraith teacher funny, thats just sad.

OORampant - :weep:
rampant

03-03-07, 10:33 PM		Rose - Welcome to the forgotten freedom home of the Doom Chili.

Devon - Da-na-na

Desmon - Doom Chili?

Devon - Da-na-na

Rose - Yes, Doom Chili

Devon - Da-na-na

Desmon - Why is it called Doom Chili?

Devon - Da-na-na

Rose - Because of the secret ingedient

Devon - Da-na-na

Rose - OH FOR THE LOVE OF TERRA! Die you black mark on the souls of all true minstrels!

Devon - Doo-da-doo Rose received... a restraining order!
urial angel of death

03-03-07, 10:36 PM		OOC: And so Kerrith abandoned all hope once again and set off to stop the neo-kythons now ravanging the country-side.

Kerrith: What?! I give up hope just like that!

OOC: Yup, and so he gave u-

Kerrith: No way man!

OOC: Yes he did.

Kerrith: No I didn't!

OOC:*pop* Kerrith appears outside of the neo-kython dens.

Kerrith: Oh yeah. teleport. *back on FF* I can keep this up all day!

Momo: What are those creatures beneath the ship?

Kerrith: Oh those are neo-kyt- DAMNIT!
Kaizer_Ryu

03-04-07, 01:11 AM		OOC: Sorry for the delay, minor case of writers block *puts worn out jackhammer away*. I know what it is I want to do and can see it in my head, I've just been having trouble putting it into words. Moreso than normal.

I've been trying and trying, but it just won't do it. :allalone:

I'm gonna go rework it, try a different angle. I'd rather get it right than do something so important to her development half-assed.

Hopefully tonight, but maybe a good nights sleep will help.

*sigh*
Paulon

03-04-07, 01:39 AM		That sounds like me and the hassles I'm having with a character intro. My sympathies, as I know the feeling. :banghead: OTOH, from your posts to date you'll get over it faster and do a better job than I'm likely to.
rampant

03-04-07, 01:49 AM		Teiza - One moment Sensei.

Terra - :confused:

Teiza - GOT YOU *GLARE*

Scias - Ipe ipe ipe *runs out with his tail between his legs*

Teiza - Remarkably swift adaptation to seeing like this.

Teiza - Remarkable nothing, I just figured if anyone was here they'd get the picture, if not then no big.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-04-07, 11:37 AM		Merrix strides purposefully around the Pholly Corporation, which he owns mainly as a tax break and partly as something to blow up if he feels cranky. People scamper back to their mind-numbing jobs when they sense him comming.

All but one, trying very hard to seduce the lovely young ladies in the break room, and failing because he's an incompetant pervert.

Merrix: Ketler!

Ketler: :bored: Hi bro.

Merrix: I told you not to call me that at work!

Ketler: :rolleyes: Yes boss.

Merrix: And whipe that patronizing expression off your face. You should be groveling on the floor since I gave you this job after that incident with the Silver Flame pontiff. Now get back in there!

Ketler: Y'know, I fail to see how telephone surveys are integral to taking over the world.

Merrix: That's why you'll never amount to anything: you can't see past your disgusting hobbies long enough to realize anything subtle. It's a ditraction: people think about how stupid these surveys are rather than about watching for plans of world conquest. Now get back to work, you lazy perverted bum!

Ketler: All right, all right. (muttered) One day Merrix, one day you'll see I'm even more of a genius than you can even dream.

Ketler goes back to his cubicle, sits down, puts on the headset, and brings up his contact list.

Ketler: "possibly Ted Elric"? WTF does that mean? Why can't I ever get some hot chicks? *presses auto-dialing button*

transcript of conversation (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-plgpZj4fj8&mode=related&search=)
rampant

03-04-07, 01:56 PM		EE's cafeteria

Lucile (3rd year half-ogre) - Wow! I'm never gonna get used to that stuff Corre.

Corre - Yeah I know you girls think its creepy. But I need to use it or it will entrophy just like a muscle.

Tennen (2nd year hobgoblin) - So, since the headmistress says you shouldn't use it in class. She needs to take other opportunities to practice.

Lucile - I understand that, but must you hang upside down from the ceiling every lunch period?

Corre - No *the thread of crystals sprouting from her tails thicken and form a pillar, the base of which crawls down the ceiling and onto the wall supporting Corre sideways.*

Lucile - That's even worse, now I'm talking to your feet.

Reshalin - Why even talk to that freak at all.

Tennen - Find us another first year student who can hold her own against Tubs for 10 minutes and we'll talk.

Tessa (Karnnathi girl) - Monster

Shiela (anduarin girl) - Freak

Tennen - Corpse huggers, and surrender monkeys need to be more polite.

Corre - The meatloaf is edible today.

Reshalin - Hey spider-butt we're talking to you.

Lucile - Leave her alone, just because she kicked your butt in the spars this morning.

Reshalin - She cheated! She used her freak powers!

Tennen - Like nobody saw that dragonmark going active?

Reshalin - :headexplo: You twisted little monster, I bet your parents sent you here so they didn't have to look at you.

Tennen - ... I'll get the undertaker.

Lucile - Excuse me Reshalin, would you mind getting measured for a coffin now. *looks at corre* Nevermind there won't be enough left to bother.

Reshalin - :confused:

Coree - (with no expression what so ever) 6:00 the big circle in the backwoods. No teachers, no rules, no whining.

Reshalin - Deal freak.
rampant

03-04-07, 05:03 PM		Reshalin - Where is she, we've been waiting half an hour.

Tessa - She probably chickened out.

Sheila - She doesn't sleep right? maybe she's hoping to tire you out before hand, by keeping you up.

Reshalin - Then she would have picked a later hour, and not shown up at all. just try to throw off our sleep cy-ahhh.

Corre has leapt ouf of the trees bowling all three of the other girls into the ring.

Corre - (flat voice) Anyone who can get out of the ring can go back to the dorms.

A ribbon of crystal extends from Corre's back and forms a wall just inside the ring.

Corre - Too late guess there is no escape.

Sheila - What are you doing? *draws twin daggers*

Tessa - Hut! *readies a greatspear*

Reshalin - *holding up a Longsword and buckler* Freak!

Corre - Yes, Let me show you how much of a freak.

Corre stalks towards the karnnathi first, the girl stabs corre in the leg.

Corre keeps walking and the spear is ripped from Tessa's hands. It falls out of Corre's leg and the wound is already sealing.

Sheila's daggers pierce only so far before being stopped by a layer of crystal beneath Corre's skin.

Reshalin attempts to raise her buckler, but Corre launches a single punch that converts the well made sheild into so much shrapnel.

Corre - This is just a taste, I have power, lots of it. If you want to be my enemy fine, leave my family out of it.

Reshalin - Aww did we hit a nerve

Tessa - Shut up you idiot, she's this close to ripping your tounge out through your other end.

Reshalin looks right into Corre's cold *glare* and see's just how much the strange red-head with four tails held back, even now.

Reshalin - W...why, are you here?

Corre - Power is not the same as skill. I seek skills and capabilities. I will be truly strong. Now run away.

The barrier retracts back into Corre, who regards the 3 with a terrible *glare*, devoid of hate or fire, but rife with contempt and projecting an overwhelming feeling of inferiority upon the humanoids.

The girls bolt.

Tennen *stepping out of the bushes* - Remind me never to get into a staring contest with you.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-04-07, 05:34 PM		Bunny: You didn't kill them. :( You're no fun.
Charles Phipps

03-04-07, 05:36 PM		Poor poor Mooncat.

My moon cat ran away with my Cat moon.

:-)
Kaizer_Ryu

03-04-07, 05:57 PM		OOC: Ok, I finally got it to do what I wanted. hopefully it's worth the wait.

IC:

Terra: Before we begin in earnest, I want you to remember what it feels like when manipulating the raw essense of shadow. Now forget it. It does not apply here.

Teiza: It's really that big a difference?

Terra: It's like trying to shape rock with the same tools you use to move water. It's just not gonna happen without something breaking. Now, you see there.

She points to one of the splotches of black on top of the already black surroundings. The shape is not one Teiza could identify, but Sensei had once explained to her that the shadowmatter contained in an object did not have to match, or even fit into, the object it was part of. In a way, it was much like a person's aura. It marked them, was an intrinsic part of them, yet it did not necessarily fit what could be called their "real" form.

Terra: Tell me what that is.

Teiza: Can I touch it?

Terra: Not with your hands. Direct manipulation will come once you pass this. Over the course of our lessons, I have shown you how to feel the flow of shadow. You may not have noticed it, but as you practiced with unbound shadow, you have been tuning yourself to everything around you. Don't worry about definitively identifying the object. Just tell me what you feel.

Teiza looked at it for a while. There was so much going on around her, it was difficult to filter out and focus on just it, but that was probably part of the test.

Teiza: (i.h.h.) Ok, don't judge by sight. Your normal senses can fool you here. It could be anything from a piece of fruit to a house.

The interference died away slowly, till all she saw was the object she was identifying. It was definitely something she was familiar with. Shadowmatter by itself was like water. It flowed to the point of least resistance unless otherwise directed. While water obeyed gravity, shadowmatter followed the intertwining of the Material Plane and the Plane of Shadow. This feel was wholly different. Almost like the difference between water and adamantine. When bound to the other elemental forces of the world, shadowmatter became the frame the others rested on. She had heard this lesson time and again, but only know did she really understand what that meant.

Teiza: Ummm...

Terra: Don't think about it too hard. Let it tell you.

Teiza: (i.h.h.) And here you told me this was a power based on discipline... *audible sigh*

Terra: You don't believe me?

Teiza: It really feels like you're contradicting yourself.

Terra: Just humor me.

After a moment, Teiza clears her mind. This was probably another part of the test. There were several things that seemed out of place with her other lessons, but Sensei hadn't steered her wrong yet.

Teiza: (i.h.h.: How am I supposed to let it tell me anyth-) Plate.

Terra: See?

Teiza: :confused: ...how'd I do that?

Terra: That was part of what I've been teaching you. With something this dangerous, I felt it would be in everyone's best interest, especially your own, to make certain aspects instinctual.

Teiza just kind of stared for a moment before smiling. That's what all those exercises were for. Every lesson, Sensei expected her to point out what had been altered in the room. It began obviously enough, like turning water into funk, but later things like slightly changing the tint in the floorboards or the height of the chair by a millimeter required a lot of attention to detail. She thought Sensei was just going easy on her after a while, but now she saw the truth.

Teiza: By getting me to pay attention to what everything felt like around me, you were conditioning me. Safe and effective use requires the ability to identify and alter things at a moments notice.

Terra: Indeed. The less you have to worry about in tense situations, the better. Now we continue. Where am I?

That...was decidedly harder than one would think. With this kind of sense, she was almost literally everywhere. Now, if she could just filter the ambient energy like befo-...

Teiza: That's a trick question, isn't it?

Terra: *giggle* Very good! Now, one last thing to do.

Teiza: :D Manipulation?!

Terra: Nope.

Teiza: Awww...

Terra: This test is to see how well you've taken what I've taught you to heart. The instincts have taken, you understand exactly where I fit in your use of shadowmagic, and now, I want you to pick up the plate you identified before.

Teiza: :confused: That's it?

Terra: That's it.

Shrugging, Teiza went over to the plate. Reaching for it, she noticed the first problem. She couldn't see her hands. She could see the shadowmatter that composed them, but that was no real indication of where they were. Hand/eye coordination was surprisingly difficult with this sight.

Teiza: (i.h.h.) Ok, just try it. Maybe it's not as hard as it appears.

Reaching out, she found it quite impossible even to touch it.

Teiza: (i.h.h.) Wait...I should at least be able to feel it. She said we were still in the same place, but I can't even feel the floor... She also said she could see normally AND this way, like they were overlapping...but... :blink: :doh: Oh for the love of-! (out loud) We're phase shifted!

Terra: Aggrivating how obvious it is, isn't it?

Teiza: Incredibly. (i.h.h.) Now if I can just figure out how to use that knowledge... Let's see...objects are made of different combinations of the basic forces, so...right now, I'm only able to see and effect shadowmatter.

Focusing, she began searching for signs of the other forces. She watched the plate's shadow intently as she began attempting to reconstruct it in her senses. Psionic's were weak, only the ambient energy of the area and those who had been near it, as was divine, so they came in to focus readily. It was quite bizzare, seeing the glow of these two energies outside of it's normal form.

Terra: (i.h.h.) Just a little further, and a whole new world will open to you.

Teiza realized now why all her studies had not focused solely on Shadow magic. In order to fully utilize it's deeper abilities, one had to know and recognize the other forces around it. Pact magic, governor of the memories of the living. Truemane magic, governor of the memory of the world itself. Psionics, governor of the mind. Divine, governor of the soul. Arcane, governor of the body. Shadow, governor of form. Aritfice, governor of the imagination. Blademagic, the place where these forces mixed.

The world around her began to flux as the darkness took it's place among the other forces. Arcane energy forced everything to take shape as her normal sight returned. And yet, it was not the same. Nor would it ever be again. She looked around and saw everything with new eyes.

Teiza: Sensei...?

Terra: TICKLE HUG!

Teiza: GAH!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-04-07, 06:11 PM		OOcat: :zzz: Secret awrrawists!……………Are they done?

Bunny: I seriously hope this results in her being able to stick people with shadow-tentacles. :mad:

Silver: No, I'm going to pass on that one. :bored:
rampant

03-04-07, 06:51 PM		OOC: Technically thats a mid level mystery so she could already do that.

Also Kaizer, that was very nice, incredible piece of work there, but what exactly did she do?
Charles Phipps

03-04-07, 07:10 PM		Princess Nelia: La La La La...

Elina: Listen, I need to explain something to you Princess.

Princess Nelia: Oh, I already had this conversation.

Elina: You did?

Princess Nelia: Yes, when a man and a woman love each other then they get naked then....

Elina: NOT THAT CONVERSATION!

Princess Nelia: Oh, then I don't know what you mean.

Elina: You and Lilly are just a political marriage.

Princess Nelia: Huh?

Elina: Lilly is a Prince of the Valenar and a descendent of House Lyrander. You're Brelish. It's just to solidify the union between your two regions.

Princess Nelia: Hmmmm?

Elina: HE'S NOT IN LOVE WITH YOU!

Princess Nelia: Could ya dumb it down a bit?

Elina: Oiye!
rampant

03-04-07, 07:14 PM		Tirmek - One aversion power, just one, her will save is even lower than Lily's.

Elina - Tempting.

Tirmek - Seriously I have to make saves not to manifest compulsions on her.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-04-07, 07:35 PM		Also Kaizer, that was very nice, incredible piece of work there, Thanks, I'm glad you liked it (and thanks to Paulon for the vote of confidence). :D

I got to the start of the actual test last night and my brain went out for a snack. :rolleyes:

but what exactly did she do?She was able to integrate normal sight with the ability to read the lay of shadowmatter within prettymuch everything. Now Terra can begin to teach her how to manipulate said shadowmatter and expand on her capabilities. Elina and Sarah's shadow form is an example of them altering their own basic structure through the same methods. Something that extreme is beyond her at this point, but by the end of her training it should be almost second nature.

This kind of ability cannot be used without consideration of it's effects on everything around it, so the ability to actually see what is going on is crucial.

Oh, and the phase shift is part of being able to see it. Terra and her children's bodies rest on kind of a balance point between the Material Plane and Plane of Shadow. She's brought Teiza to that point as well. She is still effected by events in the Material Plane, but eventually she will learn to move between them freely, becoming solid and semi-incorporeal at will.
rampant

03-04-07, 08:22 PM		Lily - Damn I'm never gonna be safe from the scary child.

Teiza - :evillaugh

Lily - AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!
rampant

03-04-07, 08:55 PM		Teiza - Whoa this is kinda trippy.

Terra - Tell me about it.

Teiza - Hmmmmmm Poke!

Lily - :twitch:

Teiza - Oh this is gonna be fun.
rampant

03-04-07, 11:14 PM		Terra - TEIZA! what did i just tell you about messing with shadow matter attached to a material form!

Tieza - I didn't do it I swear!

Terra - Then why does that one look like a spoon.
--------------------------------------------

Lily - Achoo!
Kaizer_Ryu

03-04-07, 11:24 PM		Lilly: Um...Elina? I know you like me now and all, and believe me, I'm all for it, but this may be taking things a bit far.

The scene zooms out (no worries, rampant, it's a perfectly legitimate device for a joke setup ;) ) to show Elina holding Lilly tightly, a giant neon sign above them reading "MINE!".

Elina: :mad: She's not taking you away, even if it's just political.

At this, Nalia skips up to them, happily signing jibberish and holding a basket.

Nelia: Hi! :D

Elina: Go away.

Nalia: Wanna join me for lunch? *innocent eyes*

Lilly: I-

Elina: He's not interested. *glare*

Nalia: *oblivious* I packed some of that chili you like, Elina. :D

Elina: I said he's n- wait, what?

Nalia: You've been so nice and everything, coming to check on me after all the accidents that I keep inexplicably avoiding, and I wanted to treat you too!

Elina: :uh-huh:

Lilly: While she processes that, how did you get the chili and survive?

Flashback

Chili: *menacing glorp* *threatening shlurp* *eats through a pillar*

Nalia: :bigeyes:

Chili: *gets in the container*

End Flashback

Nalia: Oh, the chili-man is really nice if you get to know him.
Charles Phipps

03-04-07, 11:28 PM		Curse you and you get a :cloud9:

!

:-)
Charles Phipps

03-04-07, 11:35 PM		Rose: Terra, I want to talk to you.

Terra: That's okay, I'm here talking with Lisa's ghost.

Rose: Uh huh. Terra, you do realize Ghosts are obvious to everyone and are spectral glowy things right?

Terra: Lisa is a special ghost.

Rose: Watch me Cast Detect Undead. DETECT UNDEAD! *waves hand*

Terra: Uh huh.

Rose: Look, NO LISA!

Terra: I'm sure she's immune to your feeble Bardery.

Rose: Let me rephrase sister. YOUR CRAZY! THERE'S NO LISA!

*Rose lifts up a canary*

Rose: Your Lisa has ceased to be! It is an un-paladin!

Terra: That's just silly.

*prepares tea for no one*

Rose: You're ignoring your family to play with your imaginary friend.

Terra: La La la la la la la not listening.

Rose: Do you want me to raise your three youngest? After how I screwed up my kids!?

Terra: They love their Uncle.

*Rose leaves with annoyed expression*

*A woman in a Colonel's uniform walks up*

Motoko: I recommend you have her sniped, the body placed in an airship accident, and the incident covered up.

Rose: Who are you?

Motoko: I'm a live model decoy Warforged. Ketler created me. I'm meant to be after Ghost in the Shell.

Rose: Ketler made you?

Motoko: Yes, he regrets giving me an accurate personality and is currently having Andrea cast regenerate on his unmentionables.

Rose: Oiye.
rampant

03-04-07, 11:39 PM		Tirmek - Well you could always let the girl have him, then you'd be free to date someone far less spoony. Like a piece of animated silverware.

Elina - :mad:

Tirmek - :rolleyes: Just saying. Anyway, looking over our options: Create political unrest between whatever two groups are represented in this union.

Sarah - Too likely to turn out like a 2nd-string rpg, we become the villians, and Neila becomes the Magical Princess heroinne.

Tirmek - But, if we plant a giant-sword weilding, non-evil straight bishi in her group, she'll fall for him and Leave Lily to you when she's finished the plot of the story.
Charles Phipps

03-04-07, 11:50 PM		Tirmek - But, if we plant a giant-sword weilding, non-evil straight bishi in her group, she'll fall for him and Leave Lily to you when she's finished the plot of the story.

Shroedigger: A straight Bishi? Uh huh, why don't you ask for something completely mythical like a walrus.

Tirmek: You're straight.

Shroedigger: Hello! Catboy! I go both ways pretty much by default.

Tirmek: And a walrus isn't mythical.

Shroedigger: Sure, like the Puma. *wags fingers*

Tirmek: :blink:
Kaizer_Ryu

03-04-07, 11:54 PM		Elina: OR it could be one of those things where I'm the true love and he's just married to her as a political convenience! :D

Tirmek: Uh...that's not what I-

Elina: Brilliant! This'll be just like Paul, Chani, and what's-her-name from Dune! *runs off to join them at lunch*

Tirmek: :tantrum: Dammit!

Sarah: :rolleyes: At least she's not being angsty about it.

Tirmek: True. I'm just worried something'll happen and we'll be back at square one.

Sarah: Yeah.

Tirmek: Yeah...

They look around for a bit.

Tirmek: Wanna make out?

Sarah: Thought you'd never ask. *glomph*
rampant

03-04-07, 11:59 PM		Schroedigger - Owch what hit me.

A copy of the frostburn book sits in front of him. It opens by itself to its animal appendix.

Schroedigger - Walrus!?

OORampant - I got a copy of Sandstorm and MM 3.5 for the puma.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-05-07, 12:01 AM		OOC: The walrus and puma being mythical creatures is a joke from Red vs. Blue. ;)
rampant

03-05-07, 12:12 AM		OOC: You expect me to pass up an excuse to thow things at a cat yowling on the fence?
Charles Phipps

03-05-07, 12:16 AM		Nelia: La la la.

Elina: I understand you and Lilly don't have anything between you.

Lilly: *walks on and presents flowers to Nelia* Hello!

Nelia: The card says to my Winry! Awwwww!

*she starts working on his arm and warforged grafts*

Elina: You're an artificer?

Nelia: Yes! My time machine is over there!

Elina: :twitch:

Nelia: I figured we'd use it for our group picnic to travel to Ancient Galifar!

Elina: Well at least I know you're not an Animal Girl like me so I have that advantage over you!

*Nelia sneezes and a fox tail pops out along with ears*

Nelia: Excuse me.

Elina: *pulls gigantic katana out*

Nelia: Who wants to play some Final Fantasy Multiplayer!?

Lilly: I do!
rampant

03-05-07, 12:30 AM		Bunny - (wearing a hat with Neila printed on it) Go homewrecker.

Silver - (with a foam finger with Elina printed on it)

13 - :D

Bunny - Either Elina kills her or the kids are too stupid to breath.

Silver - I mean to have that line brought back up to snuff before it got to this, but stuff came up.

13 - WoW is one of my best creations. No one is safe! :evillaugh
------------------------------------------------

Elina - Big mistake homewrecker, I'm island trained, and use keyblades. I get to use the KH Realtime combat system. Also Keybladers can beat even Sephiroth.
Charles Phipps

03-05-07, 12:47 AM		Nelia: Wow, this is awesome.

Elina: What...how....you....beat...my....aaaahh hhh!

Nelia: *hugs elina*

Elina: What are you doing!?

Nelia: We're Best friends now!

*SMOOCH*

Elina: :twitch:
rampant

03-05-07, 01:07 AM		OORampant - Well if that doesn't make silver happy nothing will.
rampant

03-05-07, 01:57 AM		Gym coach - Move it Reshalin!

Reshalin - *:zzz: run :zzz: run*

Gym Coach - No more late nighters for you.

Reshalin - can't sleep the eyes, the EYES!
----------------------------------------------------

A massive pit in the earth bubbles with twisting power and strange creatures composed of threads of pure energy waft upwards from it. A sphere of diamond floats 200 ft above.

Kratwe (who remembers her?) - ok kid your job is to keep the buggers from getting their mits on the crystal orb.

Dorvos - Great a giant game of maul ball.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-05-07, 02:55 AM		Kratwe (who remembers her?)Rixle's little sister. :D

-----

Nelia sings more nonsense as she brushes Elina's hair. The girl talks endlessly about how cool Elina pink hair is and that she thinks the arm cover's deep blue goes great with her eyes and that her wings are the prettiest in the whole world and how the shadowmatter that is now her arm is awesome and that she loves her wolf ears and her tail is just gorgeous, etc etc.

(The following is in Elina's head)

Elina: This is so confusing...

Aline: :smirk: You like her.

Elina: :tantrum: NO I DON'T!

Aline: :bored:

Elina: Grrrrrr...

Aline: Just admit it, she's impossible to hate.

Elina: That just makes me want to hate her more! But I can't!

Aline: Then why fight it?

Elina: She and Lilly are hitting it off and the best I'll probably get is mistress. Which I am not doing.

Aline: :rolleyes: Nowhere in the source books does it say that Eberron is predominantly a monogamus world.

Elina: :bored: You're not supposed to use metagame knowledge in arguments like this.

Aline: :P You're no fun. Now brace yourself.

Elina: :confused: Wha-

Nelia: :D BEST FRIENDS! :D *HUG*

Elina: GAH!
rampant

03-05-07, 03:00 AM		Dorvos - Well ... Hazzah!

Sharp tendrils of purple crystal emerge from Dorvos's fingertips and glow with psionic force. As the creatures rise forth the smaller swifter ones are caught and reppelled but seem mostly unharmed. The larger ones slow, but not by much.

Dorvos - Well this isn't going to work. What would Mother do?

I.H.H.

A manic grin on her face the breaker prime rips the very threads of existance and seals the gate that brings forth the beasts.

Dorvos - Ummmm, Mom?

Serene - Hun could you take care of this?

Repeat above scene.

Dorvos - Teiza!

*chomp* *snarl* *eat*

Dorvos - Corre?

Lots and lots of sharp metal objects.

Dorvos - Um,... Granpa?

Terrek shifts the orb to Tesseris, and closes the portal in one movement.

Dorvos - Oh screw this

(back to the real world) TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLNNNNNNN N

THe orb shatters under the vibration from Dorvos's note.

Dorvos - There no more orb for them to touch.
---------------------------------------------------------------

Peanutbutter :cookie: for Kaizer
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-05-07, 08:27 AM		Silver appears before Elina.

Silver: I've made a decision.

Elina: You're going to break up Nelia and Lilly? :dancin:

Silver: Nah. I'm figuring this is all part of the process of breeding out the idiot genes. There are still plenty of males to meet your criteria for attraction.

Elina: :( But……

Silver: Unless you want to take the hard way out.

Elina: Pleasepleaseplease hard waaaaaayyyyyy. :weep:

There is a puff of smoke smelling of brimestone, and 13 appears wearing a suit and tie, holding an official-looking legal document in one paw and a pen in the other.

13: Sign.

Silver: Now this document here—

Elina: *rapid-sign*

Silver: :nonono: Maybe you and Lilly would have been good together after all.

The two gods disappear. Nelia comes over, skipping. Suddenly she trips on "nothing" ("nothing" being a black fox leg) and falls directly onto Elina, their mouths touching.

Nelia: :eek:

Elina: :eek: (ihh :censored: !)

Nelia backs up in animé-zip, her face all read.

Nelia: Oh my goodness, o woe is me. Oh what can I do now? I am broken goods, I am soiled. No one will ever want to marry me now, least of all the pure and noble Prince Lilly. This whole experience has shown me depths of physicality that a girl my age was not meant to know.

Elina: :eek:

Aline: :rolleyes:

Nelia looks timidly up at Elina, but blushes fiercly and looks away again.

Nelia: Yet perhaps there is a blessing in this curse, for this experience has brought to the surface a part of myself I never knew before. (looks up at Elina again, and this time her expression is :love: ) *glomphing hug*

Just then Lilly walks in and sees Nelia cuddling a stunned Elina. However his spoony-gene incorrectly interprets this as friendship rather than hot girl-on-girl action.

Lilly: Hey, it's nice to see that everything's worked out—

Nelia: Lilly, I can't marry you.

Lilly: :confused:

Nelia: In a moment of…………*blush*…weakness, Elina took my innocence, but opened my eyes to my true self. Therefore I am marrying her!

Lilly: :eek:

Elina: :eek: (ihh At least she was honest about it being the hard way.)

OOC: I hope I'm not messing any plans up here.
rampant

03-05-07, 10:18 AM		OORampant - Who cares if your messing up a plan, Long live the crazy!

OOSilvercat - You know thats a flamingo not a calvalry saber right?
Charles Phipps

03-05-07, 10:31 AM		OOC: Oddly, that was our next complication for the relationship anyway.

:-)
rampant

03-05-07, 12:17 PM		Nelia - Ummmmm.

Elina - I think you broke him.

Lily's mindscape

OORampant - I hate these small scenes, cell phone cameras are such a pain.

Happy lily - :w00t: no more arranged marriage!

Horny lily - :w00t: Elina on Nelia action!

....

...

Common sense lily (a tiny tirmek with fairy wings) - This is the last time I show myself in this hole.

Happy lily - Yay no more pixie cat to ruin everything with logic, and thought.

Common sense lily - I hate you. Of course you realize this means niether girl needs you anymore.

Horny lily - :weep:

Common sense Lily - Yes thats right back to being the butt of Tirmek's jokes.

Sad lily - :( someone called?
Charles Phipps

03-05-07, 12:22 PM		Funny stuff! No :cookie: for you, Lilly!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-05-07, 12:43 PM		OOC: Oddly, that was our next complication for the relationship anyway.
OOcats: :dancin: :dancin: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :dancin: :dancin:

:w00t: :w00t: :king: :w00t: :w00t:

:bounce:

:rofl:

Bunny: :bored: You broke it, you fix it.

13 and Silver: *animé sweatdrop*
Charles Phipps

03-05-07, 01:14 PM		Nelia: Kawaaaaaaaiiii!

*snuggle*

Elina: Uhhhhhhh....

Lilly: :blink:

Michael: It's okay Lilly! The worst that can happen to you is that you end up just like me!

Lilly: :bored:

Michael: ARGHHHHH! WHY IS THERE A SWORD THROUGH MY CHEST!?
rampant

03-05-07, 06:56 PM		Dorvos - I hate homework.

Tirmek - Oh give it a rest diamond brain. The rest of us don't even have your ability to multitask, Mr. I-can-fill-out-6-papers-at-once.

Sarah - Oooooh I can't take this anymore! I need ice-cream.

Tirmek - Allready?

Sarah - Its history! I always need ice cream early for history, you try tracking two very different timelines.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-05-07, 08:41 PM		OOC: I put up the info on Caralot's Eberron on the Wiki for those folks who either can't remember enough to make sense of the current plotline or who weren't around the see it the first time. page (http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:The_Difference_of_Cara lot%27s_Eberron) I'd encourage rampant to do the same with his/hers/its/theirs/whatever.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-05-07, 11:22 PM		OOC: Just out of curiosity, has anyone noticed what Elina, Aline, and Nelia have in common?

IC:

Elina: How, again, did I get into this?

Nelia: *snuggle* :cloud9:

Sarah: I'm happy for you sis.

Tirmek: Though I'm not sure it's an impro-*oof*

Sarah: *pulling back her elbow* We both are.

Elina: Who's that woman that's been watching Mom?

Sarah: Uncle Rose is worried about Mom, so he has Ms. Motoko keeping an eye on her.

Tirmek: Now that things have calmed down, she seems to be taking Lisa's death much harder than the rest of you.

Sarah: It's...kind of what we expected. Momma was her whole life before we came along. Even after, it seemed everything she did, she did for Momma...

Elina: Where are the little ones?

Tirmek: Last I saw they were driving Kanatash sane. I think Momo found a way to make ghost touch squirt guns.

-----

Kanatash: *dripping wet* :bored:

Deis: BANZAI!

Kanatash is hit with a dozen waterballoons.

Momo: C'mon, stop being such a spoil sport. It's just in good fun!

Nina: *sigh* Ok, ok... *fires her squirt gun*

Kanatash: MY EYES!

Nina: :weep:
Paulon

03-05-07, 11:26 PM		OOC: Just out of curiosity, has anyone noticed what Elina, Aline, and Nelia have in common?

OOC: Of course. Their names are all anagrams. I've wondered if that was betokening some revelation that Nelia was another aspect of Elina, like Aline.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-05-07, 11:33 PM		OOC: Of course. Their names are all anagrams. I've wondered if that was betokening some revelation that Nelia was another aspect of Elina, like Aline.
Nah, just a running joke. Lilly seems to have a thing for girls with those letters in their names. ;)

Or the current relationship is incredibly creepy. :D
Charles Phipps

03-05-07, 11:42 PM		OOC:

It's sort of a Superman gag.

Lois Lane, Lori Lemaris, Lana Lang, Lex Luthor...

:-)
rampant

03-06-07, 12:43 AM		Tirmek - Elina, What is it about her?

Sarah - Not you too!?

Tirmek - No, I want to know what she does to draw all the spoony ones.

Sarah - Why would you want to attract the spoonies? You hate Llily, and Nelia makes you contemplate horrible brutal murders.

Tirmek - If I could Isolate whatever it is that draws them, I'd hang it over a deep spiked pit. :evillaugh: Whatch them all fall down and go splat! :evillaugh:

Coming around a corner

Nelia - :OMG! ... ELINA!
Kaizer_Ryu

03-06-07, 01:34 AM		Elina: And?

Nelia: :D Isn't it just adorable?!

Elina: You should see some of the other outfits Sarah gets em to wear.

Tirmek: :whatsthis She's oblivious, isn't she?

Sarah: Blissfully so.

Nelia: Can I see more?

Sarah: I'm not-

Nelia: :bigeyes:

Sarah: No...must...resist...gigantic...anime eyes...because...I'm...cuter!

Elina: You get to play dress up with your favorite toy. Why are you arguing?

Sarah: :lightbulb :plotting:

Tirmek: :bored: Why do I never get a say in this?

Nelia: :bigeyes:

Tirmek: Sorry. Not gonna work on me.

Sarah: :bigeyes:

Tirmek: ...crap.
rampant

03-06-07, 01:38 AM		Tirmek - (wearing a green sun dress) What the hell?! I'm supposed to be immune!

OORampant - Apperently the spoony feat gives you a boost on certain abilities.
rampant

03-06-07, 01:47 AM		Nelia - :D

Teiza - Don't even think about it.

Nelia - Oh you're so precious.

Teiza - Don't touch me!

Nelia - *HUG*

Teiza - I will have your skull as a candy dish for this indignity! YOUR SKULL!

Nelia - *spots Teiza's rune covered scroll case* Oh you study magic?

Teiza - Name, rank and serial number is all you get!

Nelia - Its so much fun, don't you think.

Teiza - My name is Teiza d'Borisheel ir'Tessier.

Nelia - I can teach you all my tricks!

Teiza - Rank apprentice.

Nelia - We're gonna be great friends, I always wanted a little sister.

Teiza - 7368-2573

Nelia - I have a few old dresses you can try on, you'll look so much cuter in some bright colors.

Teiza - :gel: SOMEBODY HELP ME!
Kaizer_Ryu

03-06-07, 02:08 AM		:rofl: Name, rank and serial # :rofl:

That deserves an :evillaugh award for character torture.
rampant

03-06-07, 02:18 AM		Kithle - One bottle of coconut perfume to attract spoony princess

13 - 5 crowns

kithle - stealth gear to get perfume close enough to the target to spray

13 - 200 crowns

kithle - medical expenses for after the target catches you

13 - 43 crowns

kithle - the expression on Teiza's face

13 - priceless

Kithle - There are some things money can't buy.

13 - For everything else, there's Bastard Card.
Paulon

03-06-07, 02:55 AM		Nelia - I have a few old dresses you can try on, you'll look so much cuter in some bright colors.

Teiza - :gel: SOMEBODY HELP ME!

Meow?

There is a plaintive inquiry in the sound as Fela takes in the scene. She mews again, looking as cute and kittenish as possible. :bigeyes:

Nelia: CUTE!!!!! *grabs the feline* I've got Lots and Lots and Lots of ribbons to put on you!!!!

Fela purrs, and winks at Teiza to get away while Nelia is occupied with her new plans of 'decoration'.

-----------

OOPaulon looks around for his portal out, noting it seems to have moved several yards further away from him. Without warning he sprints in the opposite direction, opening another one right in his path. The unexpected move results in fork marks as opposed to being eaten by Chalky for acting like a narrator.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-06-07, 08:01 AM		Kithle - There are some things money can't buy.

13 - For everything else, there's Bastard Card.
OOC: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

You get a :devil: for best evil parody and pun ever, but only if you sig that.
Charles Phipps

03-06-07, 12:21 PM		Bravo to you all.

:-)
Charles Phipps

03-06-07, 12:21 PM		Nelia: Yak Yak Yak Yak Yak Yak Yak....

Elina: *tth* Gods, does she ever stop talking.

Nelia: Yak Yak Yak Yak Yak Yak Yak Yak.

Elina: *tth* Lilly never talked this much.

Nelia: Yak Yak Yak Yak.

Elina: *tth* I'll have to break it to her gently that I'm not interested. She is fun and stuff but I love my little Spoony Paladin.

Nelia: Yak Yak Yak Yak....so what do you think?

Elina: Oh! Uhmmmmmm I think that's a great idea!

Nelia: Wow! Really!?

Elina: Err....Absolutely!

Nelia: Awesome! I was so worried that you'd object to me having a sensual relationship with Lilly!

*The Princess bounces off*

Elina: Wait, what now?
Charles Phipps

03-06-07, 12:30 PM		Ivy: But you love Elina!

Lilly: Yeah, I do but I like Nelia a whole lot! Besides, Elina isn't interested in me. She's made that abundantly clear.

Ivy: She does too love you!

Lilly: She tried to kill me a dozen times!

Ivy: That's how courtship works!

Lilly: Well not in my book.

Ivy: I thought Nelia liked Elina anyway. How did you get her to like you too?

Lilly: Well....funny story that.

***

Forgotten Freedom III bar
Twenty minutes ago

Lilly: *slurps on his root beer* Sigh.

Nelia: Hello former bethrothed!

Lilly: Hi Nelia.

Nelia: What's that funny red heart shaped thing beside you.

Lilly: Your Valentine's Day gift. However, because we're not dating....

Nelia: *CHOMP* *GORGE* *CHEW CHEW CHEW* *CHOMP* *SWALLOW*

Lilly: Your supposed to take it out of the wrapper firs....

Nelia: This Dark and Gooey substance has overwhelmed my senses....

*circles appear in her eyes as she keeps her mouth hanging open*

Lilly: The Hell....

*She turns to Lilly with a lust filled look and tackles him*

***

Ivy:....I call :censored: on that story.

Lilly: it's true except for all the untrue parts!

Ivy: Oiye, well at least we can get rid of the Tirmek Voodoo doll that Hyrd made since he's not trying to break you two up anymore.

Lilly: That's true. It's time to make amends with him. How do you get rid of a Voodoo doll anyway?

Ivy: I think you burn it.

Lilly: Okay.

*tosses it in the fire elemental ring*

***

Elsewhere

Tirmek: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHH!

Sarah: Now now, you don't have to get THAT excited while I snuggle you.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-06-07, 01:28 PM		Nelia: Awesome! I was so worried that you'd object to me having a sensual relationship with Lilly!
13: You're cheating!!

Silver: I'm always cheating. How do you think we got reproducing male relationships?

Bunny: ………………………………This is about a 3-way baby, isn't it. :bored:

Silver: That is not unpossible. :shifty:
rampant

03-06-07, 02:22 PM		Silver - If this work maybe I can rig up a real doozy!

Bunny - I'm not going to ask.

13 - Then I will!

Bunny - You just had to go and encourage her.

13 - Yep!:D

Silver - I figure if I can get a 3-way with Elina to spawn, certainly I could get a triple threat from Lady and One each of Satnak's and Terra's lines. Maybe even go for a grandslam by tossing in kitten. It would be a while before I could rig that up, so I'm practicing with these 3.

Bunny - I don't know if I'm appalled or just too busy thinking up all the ways of killing something an Entomanthropic Living Crystal Suferot Horror would be capable of.

Silver - Concept sketches anyone?

13 - :OMG! I have to inflict these on someone!

Bunny - Is it mating or feeding? :twitch:

Silver - Since when are those mutually exclusive?
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-06-07, 03:31 PM		OOC: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
I'm not sure whether to give you give you an award for that or just hand over my job and retire.
Charles Phipps

03-06-07, 03:45 PM		Nelia: I wonder what our kids would be like?

Lilly: I don't think a three way mating would be possible.

Nelia: They'd be Half-Elf Half-Wolf-Foxgirl Paladificers!

Lilly: GAH!

Nelia: With the outsider template!

***

Caralot: Achoo!

Kanatash: Are you sick?

Caralot: No, I just feel that somewhere, I'm being one upped.
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-06-07, 03:46 PM		Kithle - There are some things money can't buy.

13 - For everything else, there's Bastard Card.


No matter how many times i read that. it still makes me laugh. Excellent job.
Charles Phipps

03-06-07, 03:52 PM		Elina: So how did you two meet anyway?

Nelia: At the Captain Jarlot fanclub.

*puts on her Pirate hat*

Nelia: WHOSE THE LEADER OF THE GANG THAT'S MADE OF CRAZY LOONS?

C-A-P
T-A-I-N
J-A-R-L-O-T!

Elina: I'm going to walk away now...

*runs away*
rampant

03-06-07, 04:03 PM		Ketty - (over a toilet) *ralph* Feal-thas when i get out of here I'm going to kiss you for giving another child, *ralph* Then I'm gonna kill you for putting me through this.

Feal-thas - And this is her normal personality.

Tara - So the day the moodswings start?

Feal-thas - I have my tomb blueprints drawn up on the desk in my office. Its under doomsday scenarios.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-06-07, 04:14 PM		Ketty - (over a toilet) *ralph* Feal-thas when i get out of here I'm going to kiss you for giving another child, *ralph* Then I'm gonna kill you for putting me through this.
13 and Bunny shake paws.
fiendish_platypus

03-06-07, 04:17 PM		OOPlatypus: sooo tired:zzz: ... must... make... breakfast -plops eggo lazily into toaster-
Desmon: watcha doin'?
OOPlatypus: making an eggo
Desmon: whats a-go?
OOPlatypus: foooooooood
Desmon: sweet, where is it?
-eggo pops up at Desmon's face-
Desmon: Holy snap! Vile Magic, Vile Magic!
OOPlatypus: no. An eggo
Desmon: ooooooohhhhhh , eggo, what's it do?
OOPlatypus: it's food
Desmon: (takes bite) hey this is pretty good, (starts rubbing toaster), good magic food maker, good
OOPlatypus: that's a toaster
Desmon: does it make more, does it need an offering (puts a bag of gems infron of it)?
OOPlatypus: no, you put an eggo in it, and then it makes it, umm.. .
Desmon: Yummy?
OOPlatypus: ya, that
Desmon: do you have anymore?
OOPlatypus: no, and I'm hungry, so give me my eggo
Desmon: no, SUCKA! (runs away with eggo)
OOPlatypus: GIVE ME MY EGGO!!!
-see two hands fighting over eggo-
OOPlatypus: l'eggo my eggo, prince of darkness!
rampant

03-06-07, 04:35 PM		Half-toasters break down the 4th wall and surround the duo.

Hafl-toaster Champion - Release our lord from your vile bonds, and free him unto his rightful place amognst his children.

OOplatypus - its too early in the morning for this

Desmon - :confused:
fiendish_platypus

03-06-07, 04:37 PM		y'know what, I think you misinterpretted that, but it was funny none-the-less, Desmon was supposed to be the prince of darkness.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-06-07, 04:52 PM		…I think you misinterpretted that…
OOC: I have this running gag that the lowest, underdark-type decks of the the demi-plane that exists inside the FF are home to two races for which I once found comical templates: half-biscuit and half-toaster. I kid you not. And in case it helps spark your imagination, the half-biscuists worship the teletubbies.
Charles Phipps

03-06-07, 04:58 PM		Next, Rooseveldt meets Nelia!

Rooseveldt: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHH!
rampant

03-06-07, 06:54 PM		Teiza - Why does Dorvos get to go to school, and I have to stay here?

Satnak - One, because he's older,

Serene - two, because he's mastered the way home. Pay more attencion when your granpa is teaching you abour our demi-plane.

Teiza - But its so boring, all arcane formula and history.

Satnak - Those who don't learn from history-

Teiza - Are doomed to repeat it :rolleyes:

Serene - Just like we keep repeating this conversation.

Teiza - Ah....:embarrass
Kaizer_Ryu

03-06-07, 07:11 PM		OOC: I do believe that over the last 24 hours, rampant has been - dare I say - en fuego.

:clap: :cheer: :rofl:

OOrampant: :bravo:
rampant

03-06-07, 07:21 PM		Kithle - And now for the other shoe.

OORampant - *hung-up by the underwear from the mast* (in high squeaky voice) This is mutiny! I'll have you all keel-hauled!

Kithle - :rolleyes: Yeah right you can't afford to pay me for anymore appearances this week.

Teiza - You don't have the guts.

Toaster - ...

Half-toaster priest - The great poo-ba demands your suffering.
rampant

03-06-07, 07:36 PM		Teiza - I have class.

OORampant - Don't leave me up here!
-------------------------------------------

Teiza - SINSEI!

Terra - Someone's excited.

Teiza - This is the only excuse I get to be out from under observation.

Terra - Why don't you ever bring Rip to these classes?

Teiza - He has no interest in magic, Rip does sit in on the psionics sessions with mother.

Terra - I didn't think you were a manifester.

Teiza - Mother's side of the family brings a certain level of innate capability. That aside what do we have today, i'm very eager to begin work at this new level Sinsie.
Charles Phipps

03-06-07, 07:43 PM		Rose: Well in any...

Daniel Craig: I'm sorry but you've been sacked.

Rose: what?

Daniel Craig: Replaced. I'm the new Rose.

Rose: You are not!

Daniel Craig: Take it up with the producer.

Rose: I created this character! I am Rose!

Daniel Craig: Terra is also being fired for Eva Green.

Terra: :censored:! I HAVE A CONTRACT!
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-06-07, 07:47 PM		Feal-thas - I have my tomb blueprints drawn up on the desk in my office. Its under doomsday scenarios.

Naz'roth: *going over the blue prints* Not that he'll need a tomb, most likely there wont be enough left of him to fill a match box, if that.

Tara: * hands on hips* he needs a tomb, he's one of my family. he'll have a tomb.

Naz'roth: whats wrong with cremation? a lot of my friends where cremated.

Tara: they where immolated in battle. thats completely different.

Naz'roth: * reflectively* not really. it just saved on the expenses of having a ceremony.

Feal-Thas: could you please stop talking about my funeral. im not even dead yet.

***

Naz'roth: * Enchanted cricket bat of actor smiting in hand* Any actor who wants my job will have to pry the paper work from my cold dead fiendish fingers. which would be rather difficult for him if he doesnt have any arms.... or legs.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-06-07, 08:03 PM		Feal-Thas: could you please stop talking about my funeral. im not even dead yet.
Bunny: At least you've accepted that you could die. That is the first step.

Feal-thas: IT DOESN'T MEAN IT'S A FORGONE CONCLUSION!

Bunny: We just have to get past that denial.
Naz'roth: * Enchanted cricket bat of actor smiting in hand* Any actor who wants my job will have to pry the paper work from my cold dead fiendish fingers. which would be rather difficult for him if he doesnt have any arms.... or legs.
Silver: Can anyone replace us?

13: There aren't enough :pile:-stars in the whole of the multiverse to replicate you. :bored:

Silver: And you?

13: :cool: Someone has to be agents, producers, and high-priced defense attourneys.
Charles Phipps

03-06-07, 08:08 PM		Day One of New Rose

Michael: Hey Rose!

*slaps hands on him*

Rose: *grabs Michael in death grip then pulls out a garrote from his wrist watch*

Michael: GARRRGHHHHH
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

03-06-07, 08:12 PM		Feal-Thas: could you please stop talking about my funeral. im not even dead yet.


Ash "well before we do chane the subgect can I just say 'dibs on your eyes'" lickis his beack "And try to avoid garlick in the moths up to your death, makes the vitrious humor bitter."
rampant

03-06-07, 08:18 PM		New Rose - Hello son!

Lily - Yeah about that, you see while we do have contracts and such, the relationships portrayed are real so um yeah don't call me that.

New Rose - So Serene really is a lesbian, and completely uninterested.

Lily - And Satnak really is her uber-deadly wife.
Charles Phipps

03-06-07, 08:38 PM		New Rose: But I'm Bond.

Lilly: Spoony it up friend.

New Rose: I don't do Spoony.
rampant

03-06-07, 08:47 PM		Lily - Not spoony? Your not gonna last man. Goodbye.

New rose - :confused:

Kithle - Ah captain about your schedule.

Chanse - :rofl:
rampant

03-06-07, 09:18 PM		New Rose - Ok then now that you've had me trampled by squirrels, burned by the ring, and dunked in the old dwarf lady's soup bowl-

Chalky - Tastes like chicken.

New Rose - Stop chewing on me. Anyway where is my hot secretary so I can seduce her into doing all this vorpal paperwork for me.

Kithle - Oh come now captain, I don't swing that way.

New Rose - :twitch:
Kaizer_Ryu

03-06-07, 10:45 PM		Serene: How'd it go?

Teiza: Well...um...

Serene: What's the matter? You're usually so excited after lessons.

Teiza: It's not that. Sensei's been teaching me how to alter things subtly, getting the feel for how much is too much, but...

Serene: Yes?

Teiza: Sensei's acting weird and I'm getting worried.

Serene: Well, she's been through a lot. It'll take some time for her to readjust to single life.

Teiza: No, I mean weird as in talking to empty space as if Aunt Lisa's ghost were there and thinking I could hear both sides of the conversation.

Serene: Maybe she's just doing that as part of the grieving process.

Teiza: She hasn't been paying attention to the triplets or Momo very much, either. They've been under Kanatash's or Captain Spoony's care most of the time...

Serene: Hmmm...well, honey, thank you for telling me. I'll see what I can do. Maybe a little intervention is needed if things are that bad.

OOC: You can do some things if you want, rampant, but right now Terra is in deep denial. Like when Rose talked to her, no amount of "logic" will convince her that Lisa isn't there or that what she's doing isn't in anyone's best interest. I'm just hoping to get a few jokes out of it before it's actually dealt with in a way that will get the Dramadars dander up.
ratslinky

03-07-07, 12:20 AM		New Rose - Stop chewing on me. Anyway where is my hot secretary so I can seduce her into doing all this vorpal paperwork for me.

Kithle - Oh come now captain, I don't swing that way.

New Rose - :twitch:

*A sexy woman walks up*

Sexy woman: Here I am Captain Galan

New Rose: Please call me Rose

Sexy woman: *Giggle* Okay Rose here's your roster for tomorrow

New Rose: *Throws the paperwork onto the desk while holding the secretary in his arm* I'll read it later why don't we go back to my cabin and discuss it

Sexy woman: Sure I'll be there in five minutes I have to go back to my room and get into my discussion clothes. But we're on a budget so I was only given the bottom half oh and this is part of you formal discussion attire *hands him a codpiece*

New Rose: Why thank you I'll go make sure it fits *heads off*

*The camera zooms in on the codpiece in microscopic letters it says "The patent for this Codpiece of Devouring is held by Magnificent Bastards inc and we accept no responsibility for and death, damage or trauma caused by wearing it"*

Sexy woman: *Her features melt and reform into Gaz's favorite form* Five... four... three... two... one... blast off

*A scream erupts from the captains cabin*
rampant

03-07-07, 01:33 AM		Satnak - First things first, Dorvos seek and retrieve, non-lethal.

Dorvos - Yes Mother. *invisibility*

Serene - And get some lemons for Ketty, they're the only things that seem to help the nausea.

Disembodied voice of Dorvos - Got it mom.

-------------

5 minutes later

Dorvos - Got him!

Satnak - I meant all 4.

Serene - Where are the lemons? Ketty will be here in 3 seconds.

Scias - E...e...eep! :hides:

In the place where Scias stood a moment ago a huge bag of lemons now sits.

Blonde blur of Ketty arriving,grabbing fruit, and leaving in the same breath.

Dorvos - Now, bring your sisters.

Scias - g...g...got'em!

Dies - Ge'off me!

Momo - Who's elbow is that!?

Elina - Where am I?

Sarah - Where'd Tirmek go?

Nina - (on top of the pile) Hi aunt Satnak, *waves* Auntie Serene!

Teiza - Momo! Scias stop messing around and help me with these exercises, I need to practice with resistant shadows, and the all purpose jammers aren't cutting it. At least the ones Mother will let me have:mad:

Satnak - You know the rules.

Teiza - "Not until you're cleared by Sparky or Illis for class three gear" I know! But you can't get clearance for that without being enrolled, and you won't let me enroll until I'm "Mature enough" :rolleyes: whatever that means.

Satnak - It means when I, and your mom think you're old enough to handle it.

Teiza - When will that be? Huh?

Serene - *sigh* Well Dorvos Elina and Sarah enrolled at nine, Tirmek at 8, I can't really guess how old Sithis actually was or is but he looked a couple years older than Tirmek. So probably somewhere between 8 and 10, depending on whether we think you're ready.

Teiza - *sigh* Momo, Scias come on.

The three exit.

Nina - Why does she always want to hang out with them?

Deis - Because you painted her books pink, and I can't stand to watch her eat.
rampant

03-07-07, 01:44 AM		*The camera zooms in on the codpiece in microscopic letters it says "The patent for this Codpiece of Devouring is held by Magnificent Bastards inc and we accept no responsibility for and death damage or trauma caused by wearing it"*

Kithle - One of our topsellers.

13 - You're not kithle.

Maladren using her shape changing ability to be Kithle - Like the abberation said my entity can't afford him for a bit.

13 - Well then you've got the cash register.

Maladren - Hell no, it drools on me.
Paulon

03-07-07, 02:20 AM		OOC: This kind of sprung into my head at work. If it's balanced, reasonable, or anything but nonsensical, it's entirely by accident. ;)

Chilimancer Prestige Class

This is a prestige class that is unique to the Eberron of the Forgotten Freedom. It is noteworthy that thus far no member of the Forgotten Freedom crew has taken levels in it, for reasons that will become obvious... So far nobody has owned up to creating this class, but if crewmembers are asked to speculate, the most common guesses as to the culprit are Kithle or 13, with a fair majority picking the former.

The practitioner of Chilimancy is a spellcaster who seeks to enhance their power through tapping into the cosmic forces contained within Norbaz' Chili. The scrolls describing the rituals to develop these powers claim that divine ascension is possible as the ultimate step in mastering the Chili - interestingly this is actually correct.

The ancient scrolls describing the process (rather they appear ancient to any examination short of a Wish to know their true nature, which can only reveal that they are a few years old and/or contain no untruths depending on the wording) turn up in odd places in libraries or book stores for the unwary or ambitious.

Distilled to the game essentials, the scrolls give the following information:


Hit Die: d4
Requirements:
Feats: None.
Special:Must have studied the Ancient Scrolls describing Chilimancy or have been trained by someone who has done so. Must have obtained and eaten 12 alarm or hotter chili from Norbaz' galley and survived. Must be able to cast at least two spells with the acid or fire descriptor.
Class Skills: Bluff(Cha), Listen(Wis), Knowledge(Arcana) (Int), Intimidate(Cha), Spot(Wis), and Profession(Cook) (wis)
Skill Points at Each Level: 2+Int modifier.


Base
Attack Fort Ref Will
Level Bonus* Save* Save* Save* Special Caster Level .
1st +0 +1 +1 +1 It's Chili! Chili Spells
2nd +1 +1 +1 +2 Immunity to Chili +1 level of existing spellcasting class
3rd +1 +1 +2 +3 Chili is a Part of Me +1 level of existing spellcasting class
4th +2 +2 +3 +4 Chili I Am... +1 level of existing spellcasting class
5th +3 +3 +3 +5 Chili God! +1 level of existing spellcasting class



It's Chilli!
The Chilimancer gains the bonus feat Energy Substitution: Chili.

Chili Spells
The Chilimancer gains access to Chili related spells, such as Increase Alarm, Summon Chili, and Baleful Polymorph: Chili.

Immunity to Chili
Contact with Chili no longer causes any injury to the Chilimancer.

Chili is a Part of Me
By touching chili the Chilimancer can absorb it as a free action, regaining one hit point for every two the chili possesses up to his normal maximum. Once per day per Chilimancer level he can instead give himself a boost equal to his Chilimancer level to any ability score with a duration of one hour.

Chili I Am...
...lest Chili I become! The Chilimancer becomes chili. This changes the Chilimancer's base type to ooze or aberration, whichever is more advantageous to the Chilimancer at the time.


Chili God
Divine Ascension! The Chilimancer gains Divine Rank 1 and can grant spells to priests. Further development as a divinity is entirely up to the Chilimancer.


What the Scrolls do not say is as important as what they do...
The reason that nobody aboard the Forgotten Freedom has taken levels in this class is because they all are aware of the downsides. In fact there are regular betting pools on how long a Chilimancer survives once they reach certain points in the development of their skills...

The downsides:
Chili I Am...
Once this stage is reached, the Chilimancer resembles nothing so much as a humanoid mass of Chili. Communication is impossible without magic or psionics. This tends to make getting along with others somewhat difficult. Worse, the Chilimancer becomes detectable (or is that delectable?) to those who actually like chili... at distances of many miles.

Chili God
The actual act of gaining divine rank creates a disturbance that many folk in Eberron can detect. The crew of the Forgotten Freedom have betting pools on how long before one of the beings in particular takes to respond. As at this point the Chilimancer is a divine being made of Chili. It is unsurprising that the FF crew nickname this class feature as Deicide's Delight or Satnak's Snack. The longest survival time recorded so far was 10 hours, the shortest about 2 seconds. The average is 18 minutes. At present there are no Chilimancers of this level in Eberron.
rampant

03-07-07, 02:25 AM		OOC: One Crazy E.B.N.E. award for Paulon :looloo:
Charles Phipps

03-07-07, 10:51 AM		I second that award.
rampant

03-07-07, 02:59 PM		BEEP BEEP BEEP

13 - Silver! Wakey-wakey

Silver - :zzz: five more minutes mommy

Bunny - Why do I have to be up?

13 - I need a reason? Wake up Silver!

Silver - Huh? OH MY ME! KETTY! (exits)

Bunny - why were we sleeping in the first place?

13 - I think an E.B.N.E. is attempting to be funny.
-----------------------------------------------------------

Feal-thas - Yes dear!

Ketty - I AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHG didn't say anything yet.

Feal-thas - OH GODS MY HAND You're in labor, the answer is always yes dear
rampant

03-07-07, 07:34 PM		Terra - I see the head. :eek: That can't be fun.

Ketty - OH DEAR GODS THAT HURTS!

Silver - I thought you anesthatized her?

Terra - The baby has spikes! There's not much I can do that wouldn't lay her out for a month!
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

03-07-07, 09:20 PM		Lily - Not spoony? Your not gonna last man. Goodbye.

New rose - :confused:

Kithle - Ah captain about your schedule.

Chanse - :rofl:

(ooc: Take a :evillaugh badhe for so perfectly showing Chance's Shadenfreid at another poor sap finding out Cpatain isnt exactly a glamor job on this ship Rampant. )
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-07-07, 09:21 PM		Terra - The baby has spikes! There's not much I can do that wouldn't lay her out for a month!
Saberiel: *poof* Stand back, I've got something that'll knock anybody out!

Terra: What are you doing here? :confused:

Saberiel: Someone called for the E-Team, but Erk's the only one with any knowledge related to childbirth. So he sent me.

Ketty: AAAAUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!! !!!

Feal-thas: It won't hurt her, will it?

Saberiel: May drive her crazy.

Feal-thas: Whew, is that all?

Ketty: DO IT!!!!

Saberiel reaches behind her back and brings out a wrinkled old politician.

Saberiel: Something I borrowed from my father.

Terra: Aren't politicians useually associated with the LE side?

Saberiel: Name someone on this ship with a straightforward family.

Old politician: *incredebly boring speech about nothing useful*

Ketty: :zzz:

Feal-thas: :zzz:

Saberiel: Hey, it worked—

Terra: :zzz:

Saberiel: I'm glad it doesn't affect you.

Silver: Heck, this is one of 13's classic standbies. Heard it 1,000 times.
Charles Phipps

03-07-07, 11:27 PM		BTW, I consider this following scene to be canon of our game

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xG6ME-FAJdA&eurl=http%3A%2F%2Fzenithblue%2Elivejourn al%2Ecom%2F32944%2Ehtml
Charles Phipps

03-07-07, 11:45 PM		Jarlot: So what's new?

Rose: Aren't you dead?

Jarlot: What?

Rose: You're dead! You're a giant robot now!

Jarlot: Have you been hitting the rum?

Rose: Gods damnit! I am not crazy here!

Jarlot: Whatever lad.

Rose: A giant robot god! A BECOMING GOD!

Jarlot: Where's the rum?

Rose: They only brought you back because they killed Captain America!

Jarlot: Time to go loot Aundair's capital!
Charles Phipps

03-07-07, 11:53 PM		http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b166/Stryyder1/SCFAIL1042362.jpg
http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b166/Stryyder1/SCSUCCESS689390.jpg

At last! TRUE Terra pictures!

(yes, Lisa is now a freak but then again she had sex with Michael)

Michael: Hey!
Kaizer_Ryu

03-08-07, 12:15 AM		Judging by all the noise they made, she was quite happy about it, too. ;) No wonder Terra's so bummed out.

Terra: :mad: At least she understood! *runs away crying*

BTW, what's Aerith been up to while Jarlot's dead?

And is he still the Becoming God or was that actual character development disguised as making fun of Rose?
rampant

03-08-07, 12:24 AM		Satnak - You think that's freaky consider mine.

Serene extends her living metal and envelopes Satnak.
Charles Phipps

03-08-07, 12:24 AM		Captain Jarlot is the Becoming God's Avatar!

yes, he's a giant robot that turns into a Pirate with a Ninja Girl sidekick!

and no, I can't say that if that's untrue or not.

Maybe Andrea cloned him from all the vomit in her room.

Pick whatever reason but both are now still around.

It's like Reign of Jarlot

Don't trust the Cyborg Jarlot! Or Jarlotboy!
Charles Phipps

03-08-07, 12:27 AM		Forgotten Freedom

Lilly: Let me tell you a war story.

Nelia: Oh?

Lilly: Yeah, when I was with the Rebellion against the Dragon Empire.

Nelia: You know of the Rebellion against the Empire?

Lilly: Yeah, here's a story about when we had to face the Death Moon station!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WbM0VJ39Yek&mode=related&search=

Nelia: Ummm...I think you missed the most important part of the story.

Lilly: I usually leave out this part but he was a real jackass.

Nelia: Uh huh.

Lilly: Hey, he left me his X-wing. How else was a guy with no experience going to go against the Death moon?
rampant

03-08-07, 12:27 AM		Satnak - *whistles non-chalantly*

Tirmek - What Cyborg jarlot?

Sarah - There you are come on, we got interrupted.
Charles Phipps

03-08-07, 12:36 AM		Jarlot: Yo Terra.

Terra: Hey Ja...the HELL?

Jarlot: What?

Terra: You were REALLY, POSITIVELY, COMPLETELY dead.

Jarlot: Yeah Yeah crazy woman. So I've heard all day.

Terra: Lisa agrees with me!

Jarlot: Yeah, Lisa whose standing RIGHTttt over there.

Terra: OH YOU CAN SEE HER!

Jarlot: Of course I can.

Terra: Thank the Gods.

Jarlot: You know, Lisa told me earlier to lend me your Everfull Purse of Holding.

Terra: She did? Okay.

*hands over her wallet*

Jarlot: Yoink.

Terra: Why did you have me do.....GODS DAMNIT.
Paulon

03-08-07, 12:40 AM		To Rampant and Charles: I'm honored you enjoyed that so much.


A followup which seems inevitable now that I'm not tired out of my brain:

Nelia: CUTE!!!!! *grabs the feline* I've got Lots and Lots and Lots of ribbons to put on you!!!!

Fela purrs, and winks at Teiza to get away while Nelia is occupied with her new plans of 'decoration'.

Several hours later a pile of multihued bows shuffles along the corridor. Closer examination reveals that under the bows is a feline shape, so completely wrapped in ribbon as to resemble a psychedalic mummy.

A redshirt makes the mistake of laughing, only to find himself set on fire by Fela's furious glare.
rampant

03-08-07, 01:00 AM		Ketty - That's right my little one, coooooo, my precious Xiath.

Feal-thas - Um Terra, I hate to bother you so soon after a delivery, but could you grow my hand back.

Terra - Certainly. *Regenerate*

Feal-thas - Thank you. Ketty may I hold her?

Ketty - Of course.

Feal-thas reaches towards the precious bundle.

CHOMP!

Feal-thas - She bit me! She has your teeth.

Ketty - :D

Xiath proceeds to shred her swaddling cloths.

Terra - :nonono: I just regrew that hand.
Charles Phipps

03-08-07, 01:02 AM		Terra: You don't have to guard me. I'm a demigod.

Motoko: Your status as a deity is irrelevant.

Terra: Then what are you here for?

Motoko: To prevent your delusion from infecting others.

Terra: DELUSION!? I'LL MAKE YOU PA...

*DIVINE EPIC MONK STRIKE*

Terra: *wakes up three hours later* What the hell.

Motoko: I'm an Exalted convert.
rampant

03-08-07, 01:36 AM		Tirmek - I'm not going in there.

Sarah - She's your sister.

Tirmek - but does she know that?

Xiath is curled up asleep on Tirmek's wallet.

Ketty - I don't know which one of you is the baby.

Tirmek - Excuse me for prefering to keep my hands away from a creature with an inborn ability to suck the life out of me.

Sarah - I'm sure her dragon bie hasn't settled in yet.

Tirmek - Thats not what I'm worried about. She's my little sister.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-08-07, 02:21 AM		Tirmek - Thats not what I'm worried about. She's my little sister.
Nina, Deis, Momo, Teiza, Corre, and Nelia: :mad: We take exception to that.

Sarah: :rolleyes: We're all aware of the Little Sister Feat. I've got it myself.

Teiza: :smirk: But it's more fun to hunt him.

Deis: :devil: Or drive them insane.

Corre: :fight!: Or spar with him.

Momo: :detect: Or test things on them.

Nina: We have you beat.

Nelia: There's one use that trumps them all.

Both: :bigeyes: :weep:

Tirmek: Need...to...buy...them...ice cream...overpowering...! Must...not...give...in...!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-08-07, 08:13 AM		Feal-thas - She bit me! She has your teeth.

Ketty - :D

Xiath proceeds to shred her swaddling cloths.

Terra - :nonono: I just regrew that hand.
Bunny: Aw'yeah!

13: Hey, we didn't have a long pregnancy discussion about embryos eating each other.

Silver: I decided to skip that bit this time. We really didn't need all that drama after the whole dragon thing.

The scene pulls back to reveal a pile of broken dramadars.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-08-07, 08:17 AM		……[little sister madness]……
13: :evillaugh

Silver: Oh, hey, wow, I never realized you could inflict these kids on more than two family members.

Bunny: Are there any unwhipped males aboard this ship? Not complaining, mind you, just curious.

Silver: Oh, sure. They just don't have any females yet.

13: :D
ratslinky

03-08-07, 10:16 AM		13: :evillaugh

Silver: Oh, hey, wow, I never realized you could inflict these kids on more than two family members.

Bunny: Are there any unwhipped males aboard this ship? Not complaining, mind you, just curious.

Silver: Oh, sure. They just don't have any females yet.

13: :D

OORatslinky: Well Gaz isn't wipped yet but Mareth is getting close :evillaugh

Gaz: I'm not getting wipped yet buddy

OORatslinky: Ha what can you do to me I have a DM Shield 3 it's just in my right trouser pocket *Reaches into his pocket and gropes around but he can't find his DM Shield 3*

Gaz: Looking for this? *holds up the DM Shield 3* Now I'm going to make this sporting so I'll use this instead of my DM Breaker Gun *Changes form using magic items to empower his shapeshift. His new form is that of a white bunny with gray splotches. He draws out a flick knife ca-click* :devil:

OORatslinky: Dear lord it's Gaz-Gaz RUN AWAY! *Starts running and a classic loony tunes chase follows*
Charles Phipps

03-08-07, 11:14 AM		Jarlot: Well Gentleman, as your Captain.

Crew: You're Dead!

Jarlot: Yes, yes, we're past that. Becoming God punched a wall. There was a Crisis. An Infinite Crisis....whatever.

Crew: Oiye! It ruins the drama of your death.

*Jarlot pulls a black powder pistol and shoots a random crew member*

Jarlot: Now that that's done. It's time to talk about BURIED TREASURE!

Crew: *stare*

Jarlot: Yes, a vast unclaimed horde of riches that I'm claiming and that will allow me to become a KING of Galifar!

Rose: We're already obscenely wealthy when we're not paying for booze.

Jarlot: WHICH IS NEVER! We're negative 100,000,000 gp profit margin! So we need the Dread Pirate Treasure of.....Captain Jarlot the First! My Emperor ancestor!

Rose: The Emperor wasn't a Captain.

Jarlot: Whatever, it's on Xen'drick.

Rose: Which part?

Jarlot: The MMORP part!

Rose: Oh hell

Jarlot: Once through that, we have to through the World's Biggest Dungeon and something called the Tomb of Horrors. Then through Bloodstone pass and through the "Module Designed Specifically to kill Satnak"

Satnak: Hey!

Jarlot: Do you want to be Captain?

Satnak: Yes.

Jarlot: Too bad!

Serene: *sticks out tongue*

Jarlot: That's it, you're forced to watch old movies of my early career as a Space Cowboy

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-vZ-IHgj1A4
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-08-07, 12:16 PM		Korranberg Cronicle

Karrnathi Report
In a surprise move today, the newly self-appointed Furher annoiced that from now on all female military officers shall be required to wear tiny miniskirts. A crazy drunken half-elf wearing a pirate hat had this to say:
"What, so now the entire country is stuck in Original Star Trek?"
rampant

03-08-07, 12:38 PM		Tirmek - Self-...narration... not helping

Sarah - :bigeyes:

Tirmek - Fine you win we'll go get ice-cream, just as soon as someone can get Xiath to stop hoarding my wallet.

Xiath - :zzz:
rampant

03-08-07, 12:56 PM		Momo - hmmmmmmm :idea:

Momo takes out two largish metal disks and clinks them together.

Xiath - Wakes up and beelines Momo.

Momo - Get the wallet!

Momo flings the discs accross to opposite ends of the room.

Xiath chases after them and leaves the wallet ungaurded.

Tirmek - Got it lets go!

The Kids exit leaving Xiath with the metal disks and Ketty.

Ketty - hahaha you certainly are a little trouble maker.

Xiath - gooo:D
urial angel of death

03-08-07, 01:47 PM		Volrath: *sigh*

Lenneth: What's wrong daddy.

Volrath: Oh the grafting business isn't going so well. There aren't any evil overlords left. All I have going is that special project with Deis.
---------
In a cavern somewhere in the lowwer decks. Deis is standing above a pit.

Deis: It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.

Drizzt: *in the pit* Someone please help me.
---------
Lenneth: Couldn't you turn your talents to a different line of work?

Volrath: I don't think there anythin- :lightbulb
---------
A few hours later a sign is hanging about Volrath's lab that reads, "Volrath's plastic surgery and cosmetic additions Clinic"
rampant

03-08-07, 01:53 PM		Tirmek - hmmmmm I've always wanted a tail.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-08-07, 02:17 PM		......a sign is hanging about Volrath's lab that reads, "Volrath's plastic surgery and cosmetic additions Clinic"
Silver: You don't need to be an aberrant overlord to give people freaky additions. ;)
rampant

03-08-07, 02:28 PM		Volrath - true, but i get a better :evillaugh:
Charles Phipps

03-08-07, 02:34 PM		Jarlot: Dol Dorn, I have never prayed to you before, I have no tongue for it. No one, not even you, will remember if we were good men or bad, why we fought or how we died. No, all that matters, is that two stood against many. That's what's important. Battle pleases you, Dol Dorn, so grant me one request: grant me revenge! And if you do not listen, then to hell with you!

Rose: What the hell are you doing?

Jarlot: I'm preparing to go clean out the refridgerator. There's been chili in there untouched for eight months....
rampant

03-08-07, 05:54 PM		Hoar Frost Chili - ROOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAARRRR

Jarlot - Have at thee!

Rose - I feel someone stepping on my turf

OOKaizer - me too.
----------------------------------

Sarah - I think I really look better in blue.

Tirmek - I'm wearing purple, no one gets to whine about the outfits.

Nelia - Red usually isn't my color, but i like it.:D

Elina - No way Sarah no trades.

------------------------------------

Lily - Why the hell am I wearing a dress?

Shrinemaiden - Hurry my lady Zelda we must summon the champion Link to keep Vaati sealed.

Lily - :weep: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Charles Phipps

03-08-07, 06:06 PM		The Wedding Chapel

Nelia: Wow, the first heterosexual wedding in the Forgotten Freedom's history!

Lilly: Errr, you intend to marry Elina after this too.

Nelia: This day is still monumentous.

Lilly: Does Elina know about this.

Nelia: She doesn't have to. I'm a Princess.

Lilly: Is that why I'm chained down.

Nelia: No cold feet for you hubby! You might die on the pirate treasure hunting mission and I must be CONSUMATED with!

Lilly: Oh boy.

Nelia: I made a sacrifice of a Red Shirt to the Love Goddess for this occasion not to be interrupted.

*Jarlot and a horde of pirates breaks through the chapel windows and begin looting*

Nelia: Continue the ceremony!

*pulls out broadsword from under her wedding dress of holding*
Kaizer_Ryu

03-08-07, 06:43 PM		OOKaizer: Actually, Caralot and Kanatash's wedding was heterosexual.

Elina: FOCUS! I'm FIFTEEN, I recently lost one of my parents and the other is currently insane in a bad way!

OOKaizer: So?

Elina: I don't wanna be married at fifteen! And since when do I not get a say in who and when I marry?

OOKaizer: Since you're still a Princess of Thrane and it's funny.

Elina: :mad: Jerk.

OOKaizer: Hey, you're still marrying Lilly. And this way, Ares will look more favorably on your couplings.

Elina: :confused: Who?

OOKaizer: Ares, god of Mars.

Elina: ...I'm not talking to you any more. :nonono: *walks off*

OOKaizer: Get back here! Don't make me declare Martian Law! Sir Phobos.

OORei: Stop calling me that!

OOUrial: *WHACK* Show proper respect to the Lord Consulate of the Sacred Planet Red Mars.

OOKaizer: Good man, Sir Demos.
rampant

03-08-07, 06:55 PM		OORampant - Pay attention Kaizer! Four swords spoof right freaking here!

OOKaizer - Why four swords?

OORampant - It was the only way to get enough characters in there, the normal games have bit of a limited cast.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-08-07, 07:07 PM		OOcat: Oooo, hey, The Book of the Four Swords.

Bunny: And it could have a deathless who can transform into a wolf and teaches people maneuvers.
Charles Phipps

03-08-07, 07:14 PM		Lilly: I refuse to participate in a crossover where I'm not Link.

Tirmek: You make such a pretty girl.

Lilly: Shut up Other Zelda!

Rose: This is infringing on my stick. It's like Lilly as Cloud.

Jarlot: Hey hey! Only one Cloud Rip off here!
rampant

03-08-07, 07:26 PM		OORampant - Look I'm sorry but Nelia's the only one who's personality fit the red suit. Besides would youleave her incharge of all the important artifacts in this building without a supervisor around?

Lily - Ok you have a point, but why not Elina as Zelda?

OORampant - look do you want to see Nelia and Elina in short tunics and tights or not?
Charles Phipps

03-08-07, 07:28 PM		Elina: I like Lilly in short things!

Tirmek: I like this dress and holding a triforce!

Lilly: The girl thing works for you. Not me.

Michael: Hey cutie!

*pause*

Michael: OH GODS! THE SWORD IS IN MY CHEST AGAIN!

Nelia: If Link doesn't work out, I'll happily be Samus Aaron.

*Nelia pulls out an 8 foot long chain gun*

Nelia: I'm going to smoke me some b****!

Tirmek: And she kept her cute voice the entire way through.

Aerith: That little girl is stealing my bit.
rampant

03-08-07, 07:33 PM		Tirmek - Fine I'll be Zelda.

Sarah - :yay:

Tirmek = Zelda

Lily = Purple link (vio)

Nelia = Red link (red)

Elina = Blue link (blue)

Sarah - Green Link (green)
Charles Phipps

03-08-07, 07:48 PM		Ketler: Link on Link action. I've had that fantasy.

Link: I feel tricked.

Nelia: Does Breland allow Link marriage? King Steve says its responsible for the rise in cancer and not the Nuclear Dragonshard Plant.
rampant

03-08-07, 07:52 PM		Lily - Why is Sarah green link?

Sarah - Because My girlreind is Zelda.

Lily - Its hard to argue with that.
-------------------------------------

Tirmek - This is a sweet gig. I get to boss spoony around.
Charles Phipps

03-08-07, 07:55 PM		Rose: And one thing to make this Complete.

Tirmek: What?

*Tirmek is shot in the tail by tranquilizers, falls asleep on altar*

Rose: OR wait, was I supposed to encase him in crystal....

*Gets vat of fast drying glue*
Kaizer_Ryu

03-08-07, 08:03 PM		OOKaizer: Must...not...get...distracted...! Must...study...for...final...! Due...tomorrow...! But...want...to...join...in...Zelda...sp oof...! ZELDAAAAAAA!!!!!

*Navi smacks him around for a while*

OOKaizer: Ugh...thanks, Navi. I lost control. C'mon, let's go fishing! *Navi floats off towards the pond* (i.h.h.) You're next...BAIT. :evillaugh
rampant

03-08-07, 08:11 PM		OOrampant - Fourswords version remember,its a kidnapping gig.

Rose - Oh right!

Tirmek - Excuse I have to go intro the plot to the links now.
Charles Phipps

03-08-07, 09:17 PM		Lilly: Well, I have my own ability with cute now.

Tirmek: You'll never be as cute as a girl.

Lilly: Perhaps not but *puts on a magic ring*

http://www.saunalahti.fi/~arhu/kitten.jpg

Tirmek: Oh my God....
rampant

03-08-07, 09:53 PM		Tirmek - Cute kittens don't work on me.

Lily - Where the hell did you get the megaton hammer?

Tirmek - Hammerspace. NOW GET IN THERE AND USE THE FOUR SWORD TO BEAT THE SNOT OUT OF YOURSELVES SO YU CAN RELEASE THE BADGUY AND GET THIS OVERWHITH!

Lily - Its your time of month isn't it.

Tirmek - :twitch:
rampant

03-09-07, 12:47 AM		Lily - I half expected you to be Tirmek.

Shadow Link 1 - He was first in-line until he learned this was a scripted ending.

Nelia - MY BETROTHED! EYES OFF *****!

Shadow Link 2 - Which one the Spoony or the uber?

Nelia - BOTH!

Shadow Link 3 - Help me!

Elina - Come back here and fight me!

Sarah - That was easy.

Shadow link 4 - CHEATER!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-09-07, 09:56 AM		Monty Python Announcer Guy: And now, for something, completely different…

Schroedigger: DIE!!!! :fight:

Becoming God: *bearing chest pose*

Giant Monster: :88E: *louds monster screech*

Nalfein: No, NO!! CUT!

All the action stops. Nalfein walks out in front of the monster, dwarfed by it but definitely making it cower.

Nalfein: It's Fhtagn! Get that right! Say it with me: fhtagn.

Giant Monster: *screech?*

Nalfein: Nononono! UGH! I can't work under these conditions, I'll be in my trailer.

Schroedigger: Remind me, why do we have the whiny one as our nemesis?

Becoming God: Because we can't afford Kithle, and Volrath said he wanted to focus on his pratice.
**********
Meanwhile, aboard the ship………

Stupid and Linda are walking along the corridor.

Stupid: I'm so happy that you agreed to come back to the ship with me. Nalfein's so busy teaching his apprentice and Kithle's has his hands and tentacles full being a friend to everyone.

13: :looloo:

Linda: The way you described the people aboard this ship makes it sound like a true bastion of compassion and charity (i.h.h. only reason for them to take that…:twitch: horribly evil psychopathic fiend, Nalfein).

Stupid: Oh, you'll fit right in among all the really nice people…………

As they turn the corner Michael and Mickey come around a bend down the corridor.

Michael: ……Stupid said she's a Healer, wants you to meet her, maybe Terra too—

Thorn: Dun, dun, DUN!

Michael: :noway: Where'd that come from?
rampant

03-09-07, 02:25 PM		Tirmek - Well this is dull.

Ganon/Vaati - How do you think I feel?

Tirmek - Poker?

Ganon/Vaati - Sure
Kaizer_Ryu

03-09-07, 07:39 PM		OOC: As a Legend of Zelda otaku, I'm completely embarrassed to admit I never got very far on 4-swords. I'm not big on multi-player videogames, and the only other person I know who has it is Rei, so...yeah. Can't help much on this one. :embarrass
Charles Phipps

03-09-07, 08:34 PM		OOC: Don't worry, I have some wonderful stuff ahead for this demented little plot of ours.

Though I'm going to tie it into the crazy wedding.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-09-07, 08:37 PM		Though I'm going to tie it into the crazy wedding.
OOcat: Compared to what?
Charles Phipps

03-09-07, 08:43 PM		OOC: Compared to run of the mill craziness.

IC:

Lilly: Ah, the joys of old fashioned Dungeon Crawling!

OOCharles: Hold on....stepping on right foot, extending right arm, waving left fist in a circle...

Lilly: What the hell are you doing?

OOCharles: Oh sorry, I'm playing Twilight Princess on the Wii.

Lilly: Are....you okay?

OOCharles: Okay, I've got the bow aimed....God damnit, stay on target!

*sound of collapsing into a pile of controller string*

Lilly: I'm taking it that you haven't yet mastered the new controls for this thing.

OOCharles: It somehow combines all the worst elements of the power glove, light gun, and Dance Dance Revolution.

Lilly: Well at least it's not linked to me. Whose the Twilight Princess Link?

Kaizer_Ryu: OH GOD! THE PAIN IN MY BODY SURPASSES ANYTHING I'VE FELT BEFORE!
Charles Phipps

03-09-07, 08:56 PM		Tirmek's Palace

Tirmek: La La La La....being all female and stuff.

Vaati: Muhahahahahahah! Princess Tirmek! I now have you in my clutches!

Tirmek: Finally!

Vaati: You were expecting me?

Tirmek: Yes, you're supposed to kidnap me.

Vaati: Yes, I shall TO REVENGE MYSELF ON YOU FOR SPURNING MY LOVE?

Tirmek: Eh?

Vaati: Yes, you Princess Tirmek that *I* the Eye Demon Vaati have long desired as my bride!

Tirmek: Do I know you?

Vaati: You had me imprisoned in this dark and horrible seal for centuries!

Tirmek: I don't recall that.

Flashback

*A five year old Tirmek in little girl form with cat ears is playing with her doll*

*A five year old Vaati walks up*

Vaati: Hello!

Little Tirmek: Daddy! I don't like this guy! Please imprison him for a thousand years!

Papa Rakashasa: Sure Pumpkin.

End Flashback

Tirmek: Sorry, not ringing a bell.

Vaati: Fine, well now I'm kidnapping you and sealing away all the Shrine Maidens in crystals!

Aerith: Oh to be kidnapped again!

Zella Clone: YAY!

Tirmek: Who is that?

Zella Clone: Andrea was offering bulk discounts for clonings. The only requirement is you're not a paladin.

Vaati: And you'll never guess whose behind it all.

Tirmek: Mordain Flesh Weaver.

Vaati: Eh?

Tirmek: Well given he's Ganon in this game and its not like a LICH returning from the grave is that surprising...

Vaati: Just get through the Damn Portal!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-09-07, 08:57 PM		OOC: Compared to run of the mill craziness.
OOcat: Never heard of it.
OOCharles: ....stepping on right foot, extending right arm, waving left fist in a circle...
……
OOCharles: Okay, I've got the bow aimed....God damnit, stay on target!

*sound of collapsing into a pile of controller string*
……
OOCharles: It somehow combines all the worst elements of the power glove, light gun, and Dance Dance Revolution.
OOC: You poor, poor fools who bother with hand-eye coordination.

*playing the Gamecube version and laughing maniacly*
Charles Phipps

03-09-07, 10:03 PM		As the Heroes Trudge on

Lilly: At last we've managed to conquer the First Dungeon!

Nelia: This is hard!

Lilly: But there are rewards!

Sarah: :sniffle: No Tirmek to snuggle.

*pulls out Tirmek Golem that Ketler made*

*snuggle*

Lilly: No, I mean that there's a treasure horde! Look here's a horde of rupees! Ooooooh and a Girdle of Ogre Strength.

*Lilly puts on the Girdle*

Sarah: Wait Lilly! You're a caster! Test it....

*Poof*

Elina: It was a Girdle of Masculinity/Feminity wasn't it?

Sarah: Fraid so.

Lilly: Oh my God! Don't look at me! I'm hideous!

Lilly as a Girl: http://www.phate.it/phate/images/walls/saber.jpg

Elina: :love:

Nelia: :love:

Lilly: What?
rampant

03-09-07, 11:52 PM		Vaati - Do you have to carry that thing around with you everywhere?

Princess Tirmek - *hugs Sarah Plushie* Look you gave me a choice of one non-plot affecting item if I came quietly. It was this or my hammerspace access card.

Vaati - Noted.
Charles Phipps

03-10-07, 01:57 AM		OOC: i can't wait to see Kaizer's contribution in this game.

Hehehe
rampant

03-10-07, 02:16 AM		Vaati - This really isn't how I Imagined this. (three straights in a row dammit how does she do it)

Tirmek - Shut up and deal slim. (Thank you aunt Serene, for teaching me to cheat at cards.)

OORampant - :confused:

Tirmek - Listen I don't know how the original Zelda did it, but this guy has a ton of rare items he never uses, see those decorations all over the place? Those gold inlays will be worth a fortune back home! Did you see the gems in his laterns? I could trade those to Teiza or Momo for a whole wardrobe of shape changing suits!
rampant

03-10-07, 02:32 AM		Lily - I hate skultula!

Elina - Are those even in Four Swords Adventures?

Nelia - EEEEEEEEEEEK SPIDERS!!!

*BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM*

Sarah - All in favor of having Nelia use the Megaton Hammer from now on.

Sarah, Elina, Lily - AYE!
Charles Phipps

03-10-07, 03:52 AM		Lilly: *CHOP* *CHOP* *CHOP* *CHOP*

Nelia: Wow, Lilia is really good at this!

Elina: Lilia?

Nelia: Cause he's a girl now. I changed his name to a girl's name.

Elina::confused:

Sarah: OH GODS! I JUST REALIZED!

Lillia: ?

Sarah: The implications of Zelda kidnappings are SEXUAL in nature!

Lillia: Err...duh.

Sarah: VAATI WILL PAY FOR TRYING TO STEAL MY FURBALL!
rampant

03-10-07, 04:09 AM		Tirmek - Touch me and you'll pull back a bloody stump.

Vaati - :weep: why did I get stuck with the Evil Princess Sarah Wannabee?

OORampant - 13

13 - Oh no I insist

Kithle - Your pain amuses us:D

Tirmek - Trust me You wouldn't last one minute against the real EPS. One of my best friends is dating her little sister. I've met the EPS before she had her morning Hawking.

Vaati - Shouldn't that be coffee?

Tirmek - When your father is king Steve you need a little more than caffeine in the mornings.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-10-07, 09:42 AM		OOC: As a Legend of Zelda otaku, I'm completely embarrassed to admit I never got very far on 4-swords. I'm not big on multi-player videogames, and the only other person I know who has it is Rei, so...yeah. Can't help much on this one. :embarrass
OOC: :mad: Stop your whining. I don't even have one person I could play a multiplayer game with. Besides, that doesn't mean you can't completely rip another Zelda game in the process or something unrelated.

Sarah: Okay, Merry Links, it's time to rescue Maid Tirmek from the evil Prince Vaati after totally owning his thinly disguised trap of an archery tournament.

OOCharles: Not if I have to keep using Wii controls.

OOC: See what I mean?
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-10-07, 10:12 AM		OOC: From somewhere on the boards, a fun misspelling:

"…martian adept class…"
rampant

03-10-07, 11:35 AM		OOC: So you get shapeshifting, telepathy, and vulnerability to fire?
--------------------------------------------------

Elina - Hey where is the bomb sack?
--------------------------------

Sarah - I have 99 bombs! You are all my *****es!

Lily - No Sarah no destroying the whole city just to get in the palace.

Sarah - Fine:mad: , Ooooh Chicken! :drool:

Lily - Chicken...:eek: RUN ITS THE CUCCO!
DragoonDarkfire

03-10-07, 11:43 AM		(we see Marik looking at a paper of the Korranberg Chronical)

Marik: Wow. This paper business sure does make a lot of money...

Buckrill: what are you getting at?

Marik: the forgotten freedom should make it's OWN paper.

Optamis: you sure about that?

(Marik walks into a room and then comes out with a 20th century printing press)

Marik: sure I'm sure.

Buckrill: What do we call it?

Optamis: There's only one person who can do that...

(Marik, Buckrill and Optamis are in front of the ghost of Jarlot who is over a summoning circle)

Marik: okay former captain. What should we call the FF's paper?
Kaizer_Ryu

03-10-07, 01:04 PM		OOC: Jarlot's kind'a sort of partially alive again as the Becoming God's avatar.

Jarlot: I'm not dead.

Rose: Well, you'll be stone dead in a moment.

Jarlot: I got better.

Rose: You're not fooling anyone.

-----

Sarah: You know, I walked in on this once. Only with two participants instead of three.

Lilia: Mmmph phrmm mmmm!

Nelia: You're hogging her!

Elina: *'pathing* Am not.

Sarah: This time isn't quite as scarring, but...

Nelia: Not you, her!

Lilia: *gasp* AIR!

Nelia: Finally. *glomph*

Elina: :eek: Mmmm!

Sarah: ...it's still creepy.
urial angel of death

03-10-07, 03:11 PM		OOC: Sorry for the infrequent posts but I'm playing Twilight Princess on the Wii, and it is the greatest thing in all of existnce; except maybe for pie... nope it's even better than pie.

Charles the controls get much easier as you go on, and the power glove was much much worse.
rampant

03-10-07, 05:00 PM		Vaati - They have defeated the first of several gaurdian monsters each more dangerous than the last, I'm doing this by thee book the creatures are in dungeons that happen to contain the only items that can defeat each of them, and several of which are important to continuing their mission. How are they surviving?!

Tirmek - I'm going to ignore that and raise you an amulet of despair.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-10-07, 06:58 PM		Sarah: Well, this is going much better than the last time.

Lilia: Oh, right...that.

Nelia: What?

Elina: There was a bit of an incident a few years ago when some of the other crew did a 4-swords ripoff. It's been stricken from the record and most won't talk about it.

Sarah: Wasn't it with Nalfein, Marish, Doog, and Michael?

Lilia: Yeah. Needless to say, Nalfein went a little crazy and-

http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=105

Nelia: :OMG!

Sarah: Poor Doog had to go to Kanatash for months after they rezzed him.

Elina: And no one quite knows what happened to Tingle.

Lilia: Or cares.
rampant

03-10-07, 07:08 PM		Teiza - *coff * coff* That just did not go down right.
-------------------------------

Tingle 2 - Where am I?

Tingle - You don't want to know.

Maivy - Black jack anyone?
Crystalforged

03-10-07, 07:36 PM		OOC: I'm Baaaaaaack. From vacation that is. Looks like you guys have been busy while I was gone.

Just a few things I want to note, Urial, I just want to say I'm dissipointed with you. You associate yourself with Kaizer AND YOU HAVEN'T FINISHED TWILIGHT PRINCESS YET?! At least you're attempting to atone, I recomend an all night playing session as penance. :P All hail Twilight Princess! Long live the Wii!

Oh, and another thing, Kaizer, you said earlier that Kanatash and Caralot's wedding counted as heterosexual. Um, yeah. I want you to stop and think about that for a moment. Yeah...

Anywho, on with the show....


IC: In the middle of the glomphing session an old man in a hood walks into the room.

Elina: Hey, who are you?

Nelia: (detaching herself from lilly, in a manner similar to the way a dire weasle detaches itself from its prey) Yeah who are you to inturrupt our fun?

Lilia: (extremely pale and gaunt, eyes bugging out, clearly delirious) Ooooh, pretty colors... (spasms and assumes the fetal position, rocks back and forth) No more leechs mama, no more leechs mama, no more leechs mama...

Sarah: *sniff* I smell plot device.

Old Man: Keen nose you have.

Nelia: :confused: Whats a plot device?

Elina: We'll explain later. (turning to old man) Well we might as well get this over with, who are you?

Old Man: I cryptic old man of Zelda whose grammer terrible.

Sarah: I can believe that. This guy must be the Gramahr off with a stick.

Old Man: Cane +12 of bane Inevitable.

Elina: Well, then I assume you have some cryptic message to give us so why don't you spit it out so we can get back to more important things. (gestures towards Lilia)

Lilia: :bigeyes: wimper.

Old Man: Impatient are you. Message here. (clears throat) To complete plot travel through all Zelda worlds to princess.

Elina: So you're saying to find Tirmeck we're going to have to travel through every one of the Zelda universes?

Old Man: :devil: To complete plot travel through all Zelda worlds to princess.

Elina: :rolleyes: Should have seen that one coming.

Sarah: (suddenly concerned) Wait does that include some of the suckier zeldas, like adventures of link?

Old Man: CD-i Zelda's also.

All: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Kaizer_Ryu

03-10-07, 08:54 PM		Oh, and another thing, Kaizer, you said earlier that Kanatash and Caralot's wedding counted as heterosexual. Um, yeah. I want you to stop and think about that for a moment. Yeah...For this ship, that's about as close as we get. :P

Old Man: CD-i Zelda's also.

All: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Wand of Gamalon

Elina: It's...holy crap...

Sarah: :crazy: Wheeeeee.....

Lilia: I think the stench is getting to her.

Nelia: At least all the blood won't stain my tunic.

The scene pans out to reveal a horrific sight. Every resident of this world has been slaughtered in the most brutal manner possible and left to rot in the sun. Not a soul stirs save for the lesser animals that refuse to touch the carcasses of the characters that populated such a putrid game.

Lilia: I think you over did it.

OOKaizer: Not even close. I'm still trying to find a way to erase this place from all existance. This was just the warm up.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-10-07, 09:32 PM		OOKaizer: ………I'm still trying to find a way to erase this place from all existance. This was just the warm up.
OOcat: Wait, so did you ever actually play the CD-i's? Not saying they weren't bad (never played them myself), you just sound like you have.

Bunny: 13?

13: Hey, no way, I do annoying things, not sucky ideas. :P
rampant

03-10-07, 10:00 PM		Old man - Dodongo Dislike smoke!

Sarah - :mad:
Kaizer_Ryu

03-11-07, 12:42 AM		OOcat: Wait, so did you ever actually play the CD-i's? Not saying they weren't bad (never played them myself), you just sound like you have.Against my better judgement, I once tried a version of Wand of Gamalon translated to the computer. I couldn't stand any more after the first few cut scenes (or what amounted to that in those days). That game makes the 80's cartoon seem like the single most well written and astoundingly animated creation to ever grace this planet. If you've ever seen the horror that is the Star Wars animated Christmas special, imagine that but with worse animation, creepier character designs, and an even more god-awful plot. To top it all off, it's a platformer that makes Adventures of Link's controls seem like they respond to your thoughts by comparison.

Not to mention it's consistently voted by gamers to be one of the worst games in history, if not THE worst. It's right up there with the E.T. game for Atari.

-----

Elina: Ooooo, nice sword.

Old Man: Master using it and you can have this.

Elina: But...I can't master it if I can't have it...

Old Man: Master using it and you can have this.

Elina: No, you don't understand-

Old Man: Master using it and you can have this.

*several hours later*

Elina: :twitch:

Old Man: Master using it and you can have this.

Elina: DIE! :fight!:

*twin torches begin shooting fireballs as Elina hacks away at the invincible old man*
rampant

03-11-07, 01:04 AM		Sarah - DIE PIGGY!

Elina - I'm really getting tired of this gannon guy.

Nelia - It says here that he's weak against light arrows and ... what's a 30 megawatt plasma cannon?
Charles Phipps

03-11-07, 03:58 AM		Lilly: Thank God, I've finally got this curse removed.

*A woman who looks exactly like Lillia walks in*

Blossom: Hello.

Lilly: HOLY :censored:! Lillia lives!

Blossom: Not Lillia, Blossom. I am seeking my long lost twin brother Lilly! We were seperated at birth and it is my purpose to find him so that I may protect him!

Lilly: :twitch: Protect...me?

Blossom: Yes, the bloodline of my family carries a cursed gene that causes Spooniness. That is why the females of our family are all mighty warriors and beloved by all.

Lilly: You made that up!

*Ganon stomps in*

Blossom: LIMMITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT BREAAAAAKKKKKKKKKK!

*Lillia seems to hit him with enough force to shatter stone*

*Ganon turns red*

*Sarah shoots him with the Silver arrow*

Blossom: It is done.

*Final Fantasy Victory music plays*

Lilly: Dammit! We're crossing game lines again! Where have you been all this time?

Blossom: I was in another world for a very long time. A terrible and evil place of Noobs and ridiculous armor. Yes...I was trapped in the World of Warcraft MMORP.

Lilly: How did you get out?

Blossom: Well as soon as I reached level sixty, I got my own mount and could travel freely.

Lilly: :twitch:

Blossom: Forgive the glow of my awesome around you.
rampant

03-11-07, 04:09 AM		Lily - There go my plans for making fun of Tirmek when his little sister starts tossing him around like a rag doll.

Blossom - What's a Tirmek?

Lily - Think of all the rotten and disturbing things in the world, and roll them into a cat-...person, who despite having a lower Charisma is still everyone's first choice in a tight spot.

Elina - I like Lily alot, but yeah in a bad spot Tirmek is the best choice.

Lily - How I loathe Tirmek
-----------------------------------------

Tirmek - Achoo!

Vaati - (i.h.h. I saw her cards! yay! She's been playing this hand up for an hour. The little git's bluffing!) All in.

Tirmek - :twitch: Some how i know this is Lily's fault
Charles Phipps

03-11-07, 04:10 AM		Hyrule Dark Forrest

Lilly: Okay, now that we've got SOMEONE here that's unwelcome.

Blossom: I'm sorry that you're offended I can do more damage in a single round than you in forty years. That's no reason to be mean to me.

Sarah: I don't like her. Her sexuality is creepy and weird.

Blossom: You mean heterosexuality.

Sarah: Yes. That's all weird.

Blossom: Uh...huh.

Moblin: BOOGA BOOGA!

*Moblin throws spear*

Lilly: *raises shield*

*Spear tinks off shield*

Lilly: Ha! You've got no shield left!

Moblin: BOOGA BOOGA!

*Moblin throws spear*

Lilly: The hell!?

*Spear tinks off shield*

Lilly: Guy must have had two of them, well he's out of them now!

Moblin: BOOGA BOOGA!

*Moblin throws spear*

*Spear tinks off shield*

Sarah: Uhhhh Lilly....

Lilly: Shhhh, I'm waiting til he runs out of spears until I attack. It's called strategy.

Moblin: BOOGA BOOGA!

*Moblin throws spear*

*Spear tinks off shield*

Elina: How long until we tell him that the Moblin's spear supply is endless?

Sarah: Couple of more minutes.

Lilly: Almost ready for you, you Bulldog looking freak!

Moblin: I say, that's just racist! We Bulldog shifters have been discriminated again....

*Lilly charges and slashes the Moblin's chest open*

Lilly: Victory pose!
Charles Phipps

03-11-07, 04:19 AM		OOC: Hahahaa, :laugh: point to you.

That small scene was just awesome. So very Lilly and Tirmek.
Charles Phipps

03-11-07, 04:23 AM		Legend of Zelda 2

Nelia: Zzzzzzzzzzzzz....

Sarah: Okay, now's the time to ditch her while she's enchanted!

Elina: NO!

Nelia: Zzzzzzzzzzzzz....

Lilly: We shall wake her up!

Blossom: Maybe a Dispel Magic cast by me using my ridiculously high bonus?

Lilly: No! We'll do this the old fashioned away, by travelling to seven different castles and placing the crystals at the end of them!

Sarah: I vote for teleporting to the seventh castle and throwing a bomb at the wall to get in.

*everyone raises their hands but Lilly*

Elina: Come on Lilly!

Lilly: It's not traditional.

Sarah: Lilly, I'm the bratty sister so I get to explain this. Do you know why this game sucks? Even regarding its divergence from Zelda canon? It's got like Ten monsters in the entire game and that includes bosses. Do you know what two of these monsters are? SLIMES.

Lilly: Errr...

Sarah: Yes, the great epic quest we'll have to level up through along the way will be done by fighting SLIMES for HOURS AND HOURS of time. Jumping up and down to land on the little badly animated blobs.

Lilly: You raise a good point.

Sarah: I'm a thief. I love sneaking into people's houses left and right too. However, there's no freaking TREASURE chests in the house to loot! Just...PEOPLE!

Lilly: Okay, we'll throw the bomb.

*Sleeping Princess Nelia snuggles her Tirmek Plushie in her sleep*

Sarah: Hey, that's mine!

***

Vaati's Palace

Vaati: Oh, I almost forgot. It's about time for your cryptic message.

Tirmek: My what?

Vaati: Due to your connection with the Links, you get to occasionally send messages to Link that convey no useful information whatsoever

***

Sarah: Wait, I'm hearing something.

Tirmek Psychic Projection: The Dark Tower is located on Death Mountain.

Sarah: Errr....no :censored: really? It's not like we haven't SEEN it or anyth...

Tirmek Psychic Projection: Faeries can restore your life energy.

Sarah: Tirmek, are you alright?
Charles Phipps

03-11-07, 05:34 AM		101 things that the Four Links (And Blossom) are forbidden from doing in the Zelda games.

1. Lilly is forbidden from macking on the Seven Shrine Maidens.

2. So is Elina.

3. Sarah is forbidden from selling her pin-up to Lonely Moblins for Rupees.

4. I know she's immensely popular with them. That's not the point!

5. Lilly is forbidden from returning to the crazy Old Man's gambling parlor.

6. YOU KNOW WHY.

7. No, Lilly, the ghosts in the cemetary really ARE immortal.

8. Nelia is forbiddem from snuggling Moblins because they're "wrinkly cute."

9. NO, she can't get a Moblin puppy for doog junior!

10. Blossom is forbidden from using her sword to defeat every enemy because it's more fun.

11. Bare handed too.

12. NO, you won't hit Ganon with your fists to test how long it would take for him to die!

13. Lilly, really, give the Triforce pieces to someone else.

14. You've been at it four hours, you're not going to figure out how to get the eight pieces together right.

15. Oh God, did you try superglue!?

16. Now we're never going to get the Triforce of Wisdom back together!

17. Blossom is forbidden from describing how Zelda needing rescuing is sexist and demeaning.

18. Yes, everyone loves the Cartoon Zelda.

19. They just hate Cartoon Link.

20. Darknuts are not Blackguards.

21. Elina is forbidden from reverting to type and trying to enslave them into her army of evil.

22. Nelia is forbidden from using the Second game as an excuse for nap time.

23. Lilly is forbidden from discussing his nightmares about the Blobs.

24. I know what they did to him while sleeping is beyond description.

25. Sarah is forbidden from burning down the houses because they had no treasure in them.

26. That's the SIXTH house.

27. Thorn is forbidden from gloating over being the Shadow Link the Last Castle.

28. Especially when Blossom beats him by flicking her fingers.

29. BTW, Lilly needs some rest for his utter failure at Platform jumping.

30. That Dragon Level was a real ****.

31. Lilly, stop moaning over your Uncle's death in the first act.

32. YOU CAN USE THE TRIFORCE TO BRING HIM BACK IN THE END!

33. Mordain Fleshweaver is enjoying his evil Wizard Role WAYYYYY too much.

34. Sarah, stop attacking the chickens.

35. Sarah, I mean it.

36. Sarah, you're going to regret....

37. Yeah. THAT'S what happens when you attack the chickens.

38. Now go sit and shudder in the corner as you rock yourself to nightmare filled sleep.

39. Blossom, stop pointing out Hyrule geography makes no ****ing sense.

40. No, I don't know why the desert is right next to a lake and grass land.

41. Maybe the walk is supposed to be bigger than it appears.

42. Oh like your World of Warcaft is SOOOOO much more intelligent.

43. Lilly, stop praying at the Church.

44. I know it's the first Church you've seen in Zelda but that's not the point....

45. Yes, Lilly, I know the first level had you murder like 200 guards that were just doing their job.

46. They went POOF when they died, that's proof that they're evil!

47. Sarah, stop fighting with Elina over the pendants!

48. Obviously Nelia gets them because she's a Princess.

49. Well yes, both of you are technically Princesses of Thrane but she's Princessier.

50. Really, Blossom is heir to Aundair? How does that work if she's Lilly's twin.

51. Oh my God, Rose is Queen Aurala's son!? Ewwwwwwww.

52. Wait, that makes Glinda HUGGGGEEELY old.

53. Okay, you have the Three Pendants. Now you can claim the Master Sword.

54. Elina, stop mocking the Misty Forest. I admit, its not the hardest level of all time but it's still a level.

55. Now one of you can wield the Master Sword!

56. Blossom, that was just mean. You're not even a Link!

57. Fine, draw straws for who gets the Master Sword.

58. No, Sarah, robbery doesn't allow you to wield the Master Sword by 9/10ths possession.

59. Nelia won huh?

60. Can she even SWING a sword?

61. I see, she's having Lilly carry it.

62. Nelia is enough to make me believe in reincarnation for Zella.

63. Okay, now you're in the Otherworld....

64. And Lilly is a pink fluffy bunny.

65. CRAP! GET HIM AWAY FROM NELIA QUICK....

66. Oh god, she crushed him with her hug! Get him a healing potion quick!

67. Blossom doesn't change in the Otherworld because she's awesome.

68. Geez Lilly, you really fell for Blind the Thief's trick didn't you?

69. Anything with a pair of bossoms will fool you....

70. Yes, I know Elina fell for it as well.

71. Yes, Lilly, we know the rotating head thing made Blind not nearly as cute as before.

72. There we go, three Mordain Fleshweavers in the Tower. Now pretty much everyone can defeat one....

73. Blossom, that was not nice to defeat them all.

74. Lilly, it is not polite to insult the Fat Fairy.

75. That's why she flushed your head down the Pond.

76. Lilly, do not horde Crystal Girls.

77. Elina, you two.

78. Sarah, do not fall for Ganon's trick of tossing a Frizbee down the pit.

79. Nine or ten times.

80. Lilly, it is not polite to wish for a Playstation 3 and a Wii on the Triforce.

81. Even if it is a happy ending!

82. Now that you're up to the Ocarina of Time, its important to determine who will blow the flute.

83. Lilly, stop complaining that you get all the music jobs.

84. Yes, we know you're not a Bard but you reak of it.

85. Blossom, its important not to be the only one who doesn't become a Chibi polygon.

86. Using a Female Sephiroth Avatar doesn't help matters either.

87. Nelia, its not polite to squee at the cute little elf people.

88. Dammit Lilly, you burned down the tree!

89. Don't you dare blame the curse!

90. Tirmek, is happy to participate in this plot because he gets to be a Ninja girl.

91. Which is why he's stunted for by Jaela.

92. OH DON'T YOU DARE COMPLAIN!

93. Andrea and Aerith are being evil witches!

94. Nelia, stop playing with the pony.

95. Elina, stop hitting on the ranch girl.

96. Lilly, you're engaged to be married now!

97. .....TO SEVERAL GIRLS!

98. Nelia stop drooling over adult Lilly.

99. Elina drool is forming puddles.

100. No, I don't know why adulthood provides Link with that much greater power when he kicked ass as a little boy.

101. No, I don't get the ending either.
rampant

03-11-07, 02:04 PM		Blossom - He's WHAT!

Lily - Yeah Ivy's dating Hyrd from Sarah, and Elina's school.

Blossom - But dragons aren't a PC RACE!

Lily - Half-dragon, and Read the 3.5 Monster manuel would ya!
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-11-07, 02:50 PM		As desmond strides down the corridor he feels a slight movement behind him, he turns to see somthing speeding towards him. in the instant before it collides with his face he notices a red ball thing bearing the Maginificant bastard industries logo.

It reads
" Magnificant bastard industrys proudly presents, The No.1 Best selling glue bomb:
Stick and Itch!
It itches AND sticks! "

of course, in the few micro seconds before it exploded and showered him with its glue/uber itching powder contese his mind was unable to process all of this information.

As he lies there dealing with his new found problem, he hears a pair of voices.

Sithis: *smiling to reveal his fangs* and that Little Cousin, is what we call Pay back.

Xiath: Goo

followed by the vision of Sithis carrying Xiath on his back, with a bloody bandaged hand. They dissapear into the shadows, leaving Desmond to the horros that roam the corridors...
rampant

03-11-07, 03:25 PM		Kithle - I love this job.

13 - :D

Kithle - Not only do i get to tutor up and coming hellions, but they pay me for materials. *happy dance* :dancin:
------------------------------------------------------------

Xiath - Gooo:zzz::drool:

Sithis - :twitch:
-----------------------------

Tirmek - Well I now own this death fortress, all of the servants, the contents of the treasurey, and every scrap of magic you posses beyond your core combat gear, your Kundarak accounts, the estate in sharn, and your level 70 Blood Elf Paladin.

Vaati - :smirk: true, but you're going to keep playing.

Tirmek - You have nothing I want.

Vaati - What about this darling swim wear collection, I'm sure Sarah would love it on you.

Tirmek - ...Fine but you have to use that emerald studded collar as your blind.
Charles Phipps

03-11-07, 03:47 PM		Vaati: Okay, double or nothing.

Tirmek: I have everything now. You're not even wearing anything and that freaks me out.

Vaati: I do have one thing.

Tirmek: And what's that?

Vaati: The video of "Wolf Girls Gone Wild" master tape that'll be on the internet soon!

Tirmek: Gah! The one where I....

Vaati: Yes, the one where we see just how whipped you really are!

Tirmek::shifty: Errr take the pot. All of it. Just gimme the tape.

Vaati: And this is why I'm the Master Villain.

Tirmek: Ganon gave you that idea didn't he?

Vaati :weep: Yes.
Charles Phipps

03-11-07, 03:52 PM		Lilly: So why did you leave World of Warcaft?

Blossom: Pretty much it was like this....

http://www.penny-arcade.com/images/2006/20061017.jpg

Lilly: Uh huh.
urial angel of death

03-11-07, 04:03 PM		Just a few things I want to note, Urial, I just want to say I'm dissipointed with you. You associate yourself with Kaizer AND YOU HAVEN'T FINISHED TWILIGHT PRINCESS YET?! At least you're attempting to atone, I recomend an all night playing session as penance. :P All hail Twilight Princess! Long live the Wii!


You don't understand. I'm going to led it to Rei and after that to Kaizer, after I beat it 100%. First I let each one play up to about the forest temple and then start making up excuses for why I haven't beaten it yet. I want to see which on of them will snap first from the anticipation. :D

Do I get a plaque for that?

Kithle: :mad:

A smaller plaque
rampant

03-11-07, 04:41 PM		OOurial - Ahh now for a nice session of Twilight princess. Oh dear what's this my hand appears to be stuckto the controller, and its itching.

Kithle - Punk'd
rampant

03-11-07, 06:55 PM		Tirmek - Well now next hand?

Vaati - But I won!

Tirmek - You got the pot, I still have the wardrobe, the tape, the estate in sharn, and your 1st and 2nd largest Kundarak accounts.
rampant

03-11-07, 07:20 PM		Vaati - How did you get so good?

Tirmek - Rakshasa have an innate talent for deception.

Vaati - Oh

Four hands later

Vaati - Wait a minute now they don't *slams cards down on table*

Tirmek - No seriously check in the MM we get a huge bonus on bluff checks. *peeks while Vaati gets the tome, switches an ace for a two of the same suite from his own hand*

Vaati - No they don't look here no skill boost.

Tirmek - Look under the shape-change description.

Vaati - Ok I see it, but that's only if you're reading my mind! HEY! Your the good girl dammit! Stop out Eviling me!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-11-07, 07:30 PM		Vaati - ………HEY! Your the good girl dammit! Stop out Eviling me!
Vaati: I mean, I don't have the horned armor, I'm not afraid of Forest Kobolds, and my cooking sucks.

Tirmek: (i.h.h. I wonder how Sarah'd like me in the Evil Assitant outfit?)
Charles Phipps

03-11-07, 07:45 PM		Michael: Hey! You two, shut up!

Vaati: Who the hell are you?

Princess Sarah: He kidnapped me.

Michael: Let's face it, I'm forty years old now. I need to move to Evil Overlord status than Evil Henchman.

Forrest Imps: Boo!

Michael: AH!
Kaizer_Ryu

03-11-07, 07:49 PM		Tirmek: (i.h.h. I wonder how Sarah'd like me in the Evil Assitant outfit?)Sarah: *all at once* :lightbulb :angelhide :evillaugh :plotting: :inlove: :smirk: :cloud9: :ayyyy!: :w00t:

Blossom: Should I be frightened?

Lilly: Nah, this is normal.

Elina: She gets that look when a new outfit idea strikes her.

Nelia: Why?

Elina: Often times girls play with dolls. Sarah plays with Tirmek.

Ninja: :weep: Help me... :weep:

Sarah: *tail wag* *munch* *chew*

Lilly: Too bad she's developed a taste for random Ninjas instead of Tirmek, though.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-11-07, 09:00 PM		Lilly: Too bad she's developed a taste for random Ninjas instead of Tirmek, though.
NJ26: They're problem is that they're random ninjas. It's like being a redshirt.
rampant

03-11-07, 09:25 PM		Kithle - ahh the ninja principle

13 - i cooked that one up with bunny

Satnak - Thats why most island grads work in small teams or as mid level officers leading no more than 20 people.
--------------------------------------------------------------

Sarah - I've developed a taste for Tirmek alright, mmmmmmm cinnamon cat-toy.
Charles Phipps

03-11-07, 09:59 PM		Lilly: Let me try.

*CHOMP*

Rakashasa: HELP!

Lilly: Mmmm *crunch crunch* sorta minty.

Blossom: You people are really freaking me out.
rampant

03-11-07, 10:50 PM		Sarah - :nonono: Thats a base Rakshasa, Tirmek gets his strong cinnamon flavor from the Nazarune. And a hint of rosewater and nutmeg from the elf and human bloodlines.
Crystalforged

03-12-07, 12:00 AM		Kanatash: So, just out of curiosity, which one tastes like chocolate?
Kaizer_Ryu

03-12-07, 12:43 AM		Kanatash: So, just out of curiosity, which one tastes like chocolate?Sarah: Half-Orcs.

Ghost of Doog: :tantrum: Being black doesn't make us taste like chocolate!
ratslinky

03-12-07, 01:15 AM		Sarah: Half-Orcs.

Ghost of Doog: :tantrum: Being black doesn't make us taste like chocolate!

*An ethereal Gaz jumps out and bites down on Doog's ghost arm*

Gaz: Hm half-orc ghost is white chocolate
rampant

03-12-07, 02:38 AM		OORampant - Just like I thought, all packaging, no substance.

Doog's ghost - HEY!
-------------------------

Lily - ok which one of us gets to ride epona?

Sarah - You're out because you have buttercup

Lily - grrrr

Elina - Me I take classes for this kind of thing.

Sarah - :p

Elina - Yah! Go Epona ride like the wind!
Kaizer_Ryu

03-12-07, 02:44 AM		Lilly: I'm pretty sure I've never wanted to be a horse so much in my life.

Blossom: *plugging her ears* LA LA LA LA LA LA!!!!!
Charles Phipps

03-12-07, 03:03 AM		Ketler: Okay, I have to play the part of the creepy old man now. So...

Blossom: Oh my Goddess.

Ketler: Errr...yes?

Blossom: :tth: My heart is pounding inside my armor! Who is this Man-God who stands before me? What can I say that won't sound too girlish?

Ketler: Errr....okay. Basically, I'm afraid that all of Hyrule has been sunk beneath the waves. It's your job to break the curse of it.

Blossom: YES WE WILL OH MIGHTY ONE!

Ketler: *steps a few steps back*

Blossom: Oh Gods, he doesn't like me!

*flees*

Ketler: What the hell just happened?

John the Awakened Keel: I'm a boat now! The King of Red Lions! Now everyone will love me!

Lilly: *slaps the Keel* I hate chatty transports! MOVE!

Sarah: YAY! I GET TO BE PIRATE ZELDA!
rampant

03-12-07, 07:28 AM		Vaati - No way Girly you stay right here!

Tirmek - There goes my plan to escape in wind waker.
-------------------------------------------

Xiath - Gooo

Ketty - Shush little one don't say a word, mother's gonna cook you a mocking bird.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-12-07, 09:32 AM		The Forever Freedom is finally off for Pholly Corp. headquarters in Argonessen. Night is falling, and as they approach the continent kitten notices a bright glow from that direction.

Kitten: Grandpa, what's up with Argonessen?

However soon she sees that the glow is coming from the myriad neon signs, light shows, office windows, and streetlamps that sprawl across the continent on top of its cities. The signs advertise businesses to cater to every sin imaginable (even by someone from the Forgotten Freedom) while the office buildings are obviously tied to corporations of one sort or another.

Kitten: WTF? :confused: That's Argonessen? Why would the dragons pave over their forests and put up people-attracting sin-shops? Isn't it hard to plot and scheme about manipulating the rest of the world when some guy is pumping money into a slot-machine right above your head? That goes double for having coporate offices with all their semi-disgruntled employees.

Bruce: Ah, but that's because the dragons from your universe haven't realized that most people are too dumb to ever figure out they're being controlled. If you break down a modern society, what's the one thing that can guarantee you power?

Kitten: …………………………………………Fear?

Bruce: No, that's the old way. The really old way, in fact. No, the answer is stuff. More specifically money. Those who control the money control the society.

Kitten: Huh?

Bruce: The "sin-shops" draw people in from all over to lose vast amounts of money getting addicted to gambling. Corporations get a tax break if their home office is on Argonessen, making them indebted to the dragons. But that's just the smoke and mirrors. The real profit is in making the culture that everyone buys: the dragons invest heavily in the film industry, the television industry, the music industry, etc. Then they get to dictate what gets made by what they put in. Society learns how to act from its entertainment. Easy as manipulating it directly, plus it's a lot more fun.

Kitten: :eek: By my dad, and you're going after a bunch of bungling screwballs?! Why aren't you attacking the real evil here? :mad:

Bruce: Are you kidding me? And have the legions of screaming fans after us? Little old dwarf ladies who can't watch "Gold Girls", hobgoblins who don't get their fix of stuff-worshipping violence-promoting rip music, and fangirls of all species who can't see their favorite elf prettyboy kick the butt of elephants and pirates. Like I said, most people are too stupid to realize they're being manipulated. They'll brand us as the bad guys, and the dragon would just recover.

Kitten: You know, for a trip that's supposed to illusion me again, this is simply reaffirming everything I learned back home. :raincloud
rampant

03-12-07, 05:51 PM		Feal-Thas - My precious daughter to think that I would live to see you grow and find your place in the worlds.

Xiath - :confused: *chomp*

Feal-Thas - Ok point taken, I promise not to go all bard-like anymore. You can let go now...please.

Ketty - Feal-thas, Dinner is ready get in here and set the table.

Feal-thas - Um sorry love, but i don't think Xiath is done draining my constitution score.

Ketty - Xiath Let your father go or you're going to set the table, motor skills be fragged!

Xiath - Ah *lets go*
Kaizer_Ryu

03-12-07, 10:01 PM		Terra: :mad: Stop following me!

Motoko: I've been assigned to guard you. I'm merely fulfilling my duty.

Terra: I'm perfectly fine as I am. I've gone up against demi-gods alone and emerged victorious as a mortal. I speak regularly with my fellows in the Sovereign host. I even helped take down one of them! I've faced off against the incarnation of Khyber! I DON'T NEED A GUARD!

*listens*

See? Lisa agrees with me.

Motoko: Uh...yeah. Forgive me if I'm less than convinced at your present ability to protect yourself.

Terra: You tried to pick me up and carry me!

Motoko: You haven't slept in a month. You're bound to be exhausted. I was merely trying to help.

Terra: GODS DON'T NEED TO SLEEP!

Motoko: Or eat, apparently.

Terra: :mad: I keep telling you, I'm immortal! I'm exempt from mortal bodily needs!

Motoko: :smirk: Not completely, according to some of your "private" collection.

Terra: Do NOT go there, b*tch. *warps away* *reappears in her demi-plane* There, now that I'm free of that-

Motoko: Hi.

Terra: DAMMIT! How do you do that?!

Motoko: Tracers. This is my job, and I'm totally serious about it. Get used to it.

Terra: *GLARE*

Motoko: :bored:
rampant

03-12-07, 10:27 PM		Motoko - Deity or not you just don't have the ...stuff... that makes the glare come together.

Terra - Oiy You're right.

Satnak - *GLARE*

Motoko starts to burn.

Motoko - See now that's a glare, unfortunatly for her she still needs sleep and has four kids of her own.

John - HELP ME!

Satnak - Dorvos put that dire keel down this instant! You don't know who's been keelhauled! *chases after dorvos*
Charles Phipps

03-12-07, 10:40 PM		OOC: Thank you Yes, Minister

IC:

Motoko: In any case, I've been assigned by Rose to help you deal with the coming problems.

Terra: Coming problems, what coming problems?

Motoko: Your religion your Deityness.

Terra: My what? I don't have a religion. I'm just a secret goddess!

Motoko: Actually, no. Oddly enough; the defeat of the extraterrestial invasion, defeat of the demon Arijani, defeat of Sutekh, constant burning down of Sharn in righteous judgement, and casting down of the Dragons has resulted in the populous worshipping you as a deity.

Terra: How did they know?

Motoko: They guessed because you shout "FEEL THE WRATH OF A GODDESS :censored:" everytime you do it.

Terra: How many people worship me anyway? A few dozen? A hundred?

Motoko: *pulls out a scroll and unveils it* You are the prim-erry deity of the Eldeen Reaches, Karnath, Q'barra, Droam, and the fastest growing minority religion in Thrane. That's not counting thirty percent of Sarlona.

Terra: Oh my!

Motoko: Yes, it's a bit of a mess.

Terra: How bad could it be?

Motoko: Well, everyone is praying to you and because they aren't getting an answer...they assume they're doing something wrong.

Terra: What? That's ridiculous!

Motoko: They've turned to documentations of your life to determine how to properly worship.

Terra: Oh, well....oh no.

Motoko: The lesbian faction is feuding with the "threesomes with Blackguard" faction. There's also the Tentacle faction for men and Nature Terrorist faction that are against the Orthodox Catholic Terran Drug Lords.

Terra: Who the hell started all this!

Motoko: Well, in lieu of needing a religious leader to champion your cause. The people chose three separate Pontiffs for your faith from your past.

Pontiff Michael: I have been christened by the holy tentacles! Mostly to kick me off Lisa!

Pontiff Pholly: The Holy Chilli has been eaten by my Goddess on many occasions!

Brian: Who the hell are you?! Why the hell is everyone following me for the secret of Eternal Terra life!?

Motoko: That's Brian. He was born on your birthday and people have proclaimed him your prophet randomly.

Brian: I'm an atheist! Why do people look to me! They should be individuals.

Thousands of Terra Worshippers down below: We're all individuals!

One single solitary voice: *meekly* I'm not.

Motoko: I'm here to help coordinate the paperwork, assemble a Celestial Host for the smiting of enemies, and also to declare an anti-thesis for your faith to blame everything on.

Terra: Why do I need an anti-thesis!? I'm neutral!

Motoko: Perfect! We'll choose "Dangerous Extremism" for her role.

Aerith: Hello!

Michael: OUT DEMON! IN THE NAME OF TERRA!

Motoko: Like that.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

03-12-07, 10:53 PM		Motoko "Then we have the Oricle Random Evangelical mission, stragly it seems he was using your godhead to con people before you were actualy a goddess."

Terra "Oricle? what in my name does he ever predict?"

Motoko "Moastly horse races... Wich he directs others of your faith to bet on as well, on top of the donations he solicits."

Terra "and is he acurate?"

Motoko "Moastly he seems to be using them to get long odds on the favorote by scewing the bets... and he owns the book maker."

Terra "Oh does he now?..."

Elsewhere

Chanse "I just heard a distubance in the odds, as though a thousand scams just cryed out in fear and were suddenly silenced."
Charles Phipps

03-12-07, 10:53 PM		Terra: I can't believe I have all these ideas about me popping up! Most of this is utter nonsense!

Motoko: Well, you didn't refute any of these individuals and by that nature, it means you approved of their message!

Terra: What!? Since when do gods operate like government?

Motoko: Since King Steve was deified.

King Steve: Actually, I'm just the avatar of this Hand Puppet God named Banjo.

Terra: Why the hell is the King of Breland on our boat?

Motoko: Ship ma'am.

Terra: What does it matter?

Motoko: If you call it a boat then your followers will presume you've forbidden all sailing but inland.

Terra: Huh?

Motoko: But His Majesty King Steve is here to talk to you about the fact that he's decided to launch a Holy Crusade in your worship.

Terra: Against who?

Motoko: The Persians.

Terra: The who?

Motoko: They're an extinct other planetary people that King Steve only heard of because of watching Ketler's hyper-masculine movie DVDs.

Terra: Well at least we don't have to worry about that.

Motoko: Actually, since there's none, the Prophets of Terra have decided to rename Persians as anything that they don't like at the moment....which is everybody.

Terra: GAH!

Motoko: King Steve also is here to congratulate you about the fact his daughter is marrying your daughter and son-in-law.

Terra: She's FIFTEEN!

Motoko: Which is another form you have to sign off on or its going to get very ugly in High Schools.

Terra: I need something to eat.

Motoko: Good Ma'am. I've reserved for us a meal with the Middladinguards.

Terra: The what?

Motoko: Basically, militant midholy neutral warriors. They're not holy or unholy. We call them Terratans.

Terra: That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard of in my life.

Motoko: Just focus on dinner.

Terra: Well, let's just hope they're not going to be too impolite. Where are we eating?

*Middladinguard jumps out in a loin cloth, red cape, helmet, and spear*

Terratan: TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-13-07, 08:31 AM		Motoko: The lesbian faction is feuding with the "threesomes with Blackguard" faction. There's also the Tentacle faction for men and Nature Terrorist faction that are against the Orthodox Catholic Terran Drug Lords.
Terra: I have a suspicion that a certain other goddess in involved. :bored:

Silver: :D
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-13-07, 08:34 AM		Terra: I can't believe I have all these ideas about me popping up! Most of this is utter nonsense!
Bunny: Welcome to religion.
Motoko: They're an extinct other planetary people……
OOC: Actually some people still consider themselves Persian in the modern day.
Terratan: TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL!
OOcat: So basically right here?
Charles Phipps

03-13-07, 01:42 PM		OOC: Actually some people still consider themselves Persian in the modern day.


Motoko: I'm referring to the big warty Orc people from the movie.

SilvercatMoonpaw: Oh.
rampant

03-13-07, 03:21 PM		Teiza - Thank you, please put all sacifices in their assigned pens. I remind you no sentients, constructs, or undead.

Terra - What is this!?

Teiza - Well people just started slaughtering animals in your name on random alters. So I decided to have them bring them here instead. That way we can keep a proper tally, and the critters won't be wasted in those rituals that render them inedible.

Terra - And why do they listen to you?

Teiza - Ummmm there was a champion gig open and as your first "mortal disciple", their words not mine, I got stuck with the job. You would not believe the paperwork! You should see some of the crap I have to deal with. One genius decided to try and sacrifice himself. :yuck: the bastard tasted like asphalt and grass.
Charles Phipps

03-13-07, 03:47 PM		Caralot: Hey, Terra! Come look at all the Celestial animals I made for your Holy Realm!

Terra: O...kay.

*Caralot opens the door*

Caralot: Wow, I horrified a half-human/half-Tentacle monster.
urial angel of death

03-13-07, 07:02 PM		The Links are being led through the Goron mines.

Goron: This is the room where our prized bomb-flowers are stored.

Lilly: So are the gameboy version or the N64 type?

Goron: :confused:

Elina: You know that thing that was once known as the third-wall. Most people still live by it.

Lilly: Oh.

Sarah: Well these should help kill that Ganon wanna-be.

Nelia: Did you guys hear something?

Elina: No.

Sarah: shh. *concentrates* It's a high pitched slightly sad voice.

Lilly: What is it saying?

Sarah: Fireb- :eek:

All of the girls hit the floor.

Lilly: What, what did it s-

Lilly sees a wall of fire rushing toward him from the bomb-flower room.

Lilly: This is gonna hurt. :bored:

Several explosions later.

Goron: All of our precious bomb-flowers. :(

Kerrith: *emerging from the room covered in soot.* Hi guys.

Elina: *mysteriously unharmed* What are you doing here?

Sarah: *now with much less fur and claws drawn* Yes, do share.

Kerrith: Well I've been hunting down the neo-kythons and found out that their own connection can be used against them. So could you guys collect twenty of their psionic nodes for me? :bigeyes:

Sarah: They only ever pose a threat to you and a few villages. Why should we help?

Lilly: *missing all but one quarter heart* Whoa there this is one of the collection side-quests. They have extremely rare rewards.

Sarah: Who actually uses the last bottle?! Needing more than one fairy in any battle is pathetic!

Lilly: :allalone:

Sarah: Fine we'll help with the stupid side-quest.

Kerrith: Yay! I get traveling companions!

Lilly: Wait, we just said we'd risk life and main-quest to help you; we never said anything about letting you travel with us.
Crystalforged

03-14-07, 01:38 AM		Lilly: (glances up in the sky) Hey, is it just me or does it seem like the moons are getting larger?

Sarah: (Not paying attention) I'm sure you just botched another spot check. Now come on, lets keep moving
Charles Phipps

03-14-07, 01:57 AM		http://rhi.tismad.com/rhi/safety.jpg
Kaizer_Ryu

03-14-07, 02:40 AM		OOC: You know, usually I'd be all over the two or five separate plots that are weaving together right now, but my thinky.......maker..............thing... won't work with me right now. The stuff I've been doing since Sunday is the best I got right now, and even those half-hearted works took a while.

Worst part is I'm not at a loss for ideas, just the ability to put them into words. Or even semi-coherent form. :banghead:

Normally I'd attempt to be witty or something here, but I got nuthin'. Sorry. :(
Charles Phipps

03-14-07, 03:03 AM		OoC: It'll break eventually.
ratslinky

03-14-07, 03:17 AM		Gaz: Yes sir a very good choice all the profits will go to a charity in the name of Terra

Terra: Gaz what are you doing?

Gaz: Oh hello you godessness I was just selling these hallucinogenic drugs that make you think your a Nature terrorist who is having Lesbian tentacle sex at the same time as a threesome with black guards and tentacle sex for men this is for both sexes

Terra: Wait thats not physically possible!

Gaz: Thats part of the advertising *Points to a sign above his shop it reads "Have you done six physically impossible things today why not make it seven and use some of our hallucinogenic drugs now only 10.99 an ounce*

OOC: :cookie: to whoever gets the first reference and a :detect: for the second one
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-14-07, 10:28 AM		OOC: ………["I have no idea what to do, and I really wish I did!"]……
OOC: :bored: Join the club. We've got jackets.

Seriously, I'm running an entire plotline on my own. Who do you think gets to complain more?
Kaizer_Ryu

03-14-07, 09:03 PM		lkasd;jvoiuySMZ<DVB askh;'lksaD'oiasef sDl;'ika 'lksdh

Elina: The hell?

o[ixfvar ga[oixif[coyv[okaeh fpu ieqwt puadhsf['/oiifbvj ao[wipey

Sarah: Our entity is busy banging his head against the keyboard.

aposdufgjihzdf[ovj aoiuwef y hazs[iof [aiw ok'[aWEfnm] 'PAWEo

Elina: Snazzy jacket, though.

oadfui[poiwerjxc voi[ayef ausd ';lakwer[io :lightbulb

Sarah: :bored: This oughta be good.

*IMPRESSIVE SCENE WITH LOTS OF ACTION*

*WITTY DIALOGUE MIXED WITH SHAMELESS POP-CULTURE REFERENCES*

*LOTS OF CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT*

*MAYBE SOME SEXUAL INNUENDO OR OUTRIGHT PANDERING TO PURIENT INTERESTS*

Terra: :nonono: Ok, seriously. Lame.

OOKaizer: :weep:

Writer's Block: :emp:
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

03-14-07, 09:56 PM		( OOC: Kaizer, if its any comfort I feel your pain, I have 9/10th of a ctperlunk thiller sittin in my hard drive with the corpses of a dosen othr books beside it. Im good at beginnings, less good at endngs and I tend to nigle at flaws till I cant stand to look at a book after a while )
Charles Phipps

03-14-07, 10:43 PM		( OOC: Kaizer, if its any comfort I feel your pain, I have 9/10th of a ctperlunk thiller sittin in my hard drive with the corpses of a dosen othr books beside it. Im good at beginnings, less good at endngs and I tend to nigle at flaws till I cant stand to look at a book after a while )

That's happened to me.

;-)
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-15-07, 09:17 AM		The Forever Freedom settles down near the Pholly Corp. headquarters.

Bruce: Okay, people, since there are so freakin' many of us, even if we split up we probably can't get the whole "split up" vibe going right, so a majority of you should stay here as cavalry—

Darastrix: Aren't you missing someone?

Bruce: Huh………*looks around*………where's Kitten?

Darastrix: Based on what she's been saying, she probably ditched us a while back and went off to find the enemy HQ.

Bruce: Arrrrggghhhh!! :banghead: I keep forgetting she's an outside observer. She's allowed to know where the enemy base is before falling into the Stupid Trap. Well, there's nothing the rest of us can do. So we'll just…………
*********
Meanwhile Kitten is walking through the districts of Generic Vice City on her way to the true enemy HQ at the Super-Villain hotel and casino. It had been so easy to backtrack the call's signal. She'd go there, surprise the incompetant Villain League, and save the world from being turned into a bunch of………well, turned into something from the Forgotten Freedom, only less creative. A thought tried to cross her mind at this point, a thought about exactly how bad that really was, but she blew it away with the mental equivalent of Bigby's Crushing Tactical Nuke.
She was right. She was right because she thought. And because she thought she wasn't going to give evil even the slighttest chance to succeed. A thought about obsession sheepishly tried to attract her attention, but she Satnak Glared it into submission.

On her way she passed by a line of limos pulling up to a red carpet in front of a movie theater. Out of one stepped a gold dragon, in a basically humanoid form except for the head, wearing a gaudy purple and pink fuzzy suit covered in gems and gold with a giant purple hat with a huge pink feather in it, wearing tons of jewelry. He (likely a he) was accompanied by two half-elves, having all the elf grace and beauty without looking like anorexics. However, they had "attributes" that were obviously unnatural. Kitten heard one person remark that it was "Dr. Volrath's" work.

Kitten: :mad: Disgusting. People give in to the first vice they come across. The only ones really worth it become naïve shut-ins. Why am I even bothering?

Sighing, she continued onward to the Super-Villain. Entering the lobby she saw a sign proclaiming "Lilly Galan, live tonight!" By now her info had run out, as she'd only been able to trace the call to the building. She had no idea where to start.
Deciding just to wander and hope for her natural intelligence to make short work of an ineptly concealed secret entrance, she eventually stepped into the dinner lounge, where a comedian was going on and on about something that couldn't possibly be funny because it portrayed people as stupid.

Comedian: Hey, you, little abberation!

Kitten turned to find that the comedian was Lilly.

Lilly: How's life been treating you?

Kitten: Terrible. Now if you don't mind I'm trying to bring some criminals to justice.

Lilly: Y'know, that's an odd idea. You wanna know why? Cause I can guarantee you that's what everyone here feels like doing. Any guy here… (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nfery3ZtuU4&NR)

Kitten listened for a minute.

Kitten: Morons, the lot of them.

Familiar old lady voice: With what you experienced back in your home dimension, you still think that's untrue?

Kitten froze. She turned slowly. There, sitting in the booth behind her, was Vol.

Vol: Hello, deary.
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-15-07, 02:40 PM		Im good at beginnings, less good at endngs and I tend to nigle at flaws till I cant stand to look at a book after a while )

Snap. I only get to about ten pages, and then i find somthing wrong with it an start all over again.
I also ( as you probably know) tend to over embelish my writing just a tad-

Dramadar: ahem

Ok. a lot. out of sheer fear that its crap.
im not in writers block currently, im just waiting for the oprtune moment for my next post.
so, till then, i might as well amuse myself with this scene:

IC:
Naz'roth and tara are visiting Ketty, Feal-Thas and Little Xiath.

Tara: awww. she's so cute.

Naz'roth: I have to admit, i does have a certain charm to it.

he reaches out to tickle Xiath under the chin.

Feal-Thas: err.. Naz'roth i dont think that would be a good-

CHOMP

Feal-Thas: idea...

Naz'roth raises a hand, which is missing half of one of the digits

Naz'roth: hmmm... strange. it appears to have bitten strait through my armour.

Ketty: .... I thought your armor was an artifact?

Naz'roth: yes, but it can still be breached. just not very easily.

he gives the baby a curious look before using some of his magic to regrow his finger.

Naz'roth: (ihh) i have a feeling that this childs future is going to be most intresting...
Charles Phipps

03-15-07, 03:57 PM		Awwww...

Awesome Kitten post.

And very true to Lilly's character.

He suffers Rogue envy.

WHERE'S THE VAN!?
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-15-07, 04:14 PM		Awesome Kitten post.
OOC: Could have been much, much better. But not when written by me. And I can't take any credit for that Lilly thing, since all I did was find it.
Charles Phipps

03-15-07, 04:54 PM		OOC: It's the presentation rather than the content my friend.

The best post ever was a slightly changed South Park.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-15-07, 07:00 PM		The best post ever was a slightly changed South Park.
OOC: Okay, that really makes me feel better. I know I can do better than that post. I'm sorry, Crystalforged, but I thought that was the worst post ever. You did a really good job on it, that I could see. It's just your subject matter didn't agree with me.
OOC: It's the presentation rather than the content my friend.
Then I'd better go find some more.
Rei32491

03-15-07, 08:27 PM		OORei: I AM BACK!!!

Nalfein & OOKaizer: :bored:

OORei: What? I am!

Nalfein: Sure you are.

OOUrial: I think that he's telling the truth, we were just talking about a plotline about Nalfein.

OOKaizer: Yea, I don't think so. You have said that you’re going to post for a long time and not done anything.

OORei: But I'm posting this aren't I?

OOUrial: He's got a point.

OOKaizer: :twitch:

OORei: :D

Nalfein: Sooooooo, can I do what you were considering to do with my character? Or are you going to sit back on your lazy a** and not get up again. :waits:

OORei: I. Hate you. :mad:

Nalfein: :D
Kaizer_Ryu

03-15-07, 09:29 PM		OOC: This is drawn from personal experience, and seemed to fit right in to your universe, Silvercat. Hope you don't mind.

IC:
*Caralot's Universe*

Outside the main Banes & Nolbie Bookstore in Argonessen

Horde of Zombies That Actually Look Rather Alive: Uuuuuuurrrrrrrrgggggg.....

Manager: Oh hell...

Lackey: Uh, sir...I think they're getting restless.

Manager: :bored: Brilliant observation. What's our status?

Lackey: We've managed to stockpile 50 so far, but supplies are scarce. The shipment has been delayed for an unknown amount of time.

Manager: :censored: ! That's not nearly enough to hold them off! Looks like we're gonna be in for a rough night. Get the Redshirts here, now!

Lackey: It's not very PC to call them that, sir.

Manager: Fine, FINE! Just get them here fast or were toast!

*moments later*

Alive Looking Zombie Horde: *now closer* UUUUUUUUNNNNNGGGGGG!!!!!!

Minimum Wager 1: :weep: I'm not paid enough for this! :weep:

Minimum Wager 2: :( My Mom's gonna kill me if they rip my shirt.

Minimum Wager 3: :weep: I signed up to gain experience in the real world, not to get mauled!

Manager: Meh, same thing. Now suck it up, people! Here they come!

Alive Looking Zombies: OPRAH SAYS TO BUY HER CLUB'S NEW BOOK! WE MUST OBEY!

The zombies, who are now obviously mental zombies instead of physical ones, surge towards the hapless employees.

Manager: That Daelkyr woman will be the end of us all!
Kaizer_Ryu

03-15-07, 09:58 PM		The best post ever was a slightly changed South Park.Hey! At least mine was original! ;)

OOKaizer: Ok, I cut off it's head, burned both the head and body, doused the ashes in holy water, and poured the sludge from each into two separate crystal streams all in the span of a day.

OORei: :bored: You know that's for Vampire Lords, not Writer's Block, right?

OOKaizer: ...shut up.
Crystalforged

03-15-07, 10:23 PM		OOC: Okay, that really makes me feel better. I know I can do better than that post. I'm sorry, Crystalforged, but I thought that was the worst post ever. You did a really good job on it, that I could see. It's just your subject matter didn't agree with me.
Really? You didn't like Little Critter Christmas (praise the Devourer!)? I thought everyone liked that. Are you sure you're not thinking of the of the Lemiwinks thing. I'll admit that was in bad taste.
Charles Phipps

03-15-07, 10:31 PM		Where's The Van!?
Rei32491

03-15-07, 10:59 PM		Volrath walks in on Nalfein while a black orb is floating above Nalfein's hands and the Legend of Zelda music where you find an item plays in the background.

Volrath: WTF.

Nalfein: Oh, because OORei got lazy and never did anything with half of my class levels, I traded them in for new ones. :D

Volrath: Soooooo...what are you now?

Name: Nalfein
race: Elf?
alignment: CE
Level: Defiler ??/Sorcerer King 10

Volrath: Wait, why is there a ?? where your levels should be?

Nalfein: You don't want to know.

Volrath: So...you're just that high?

Nalfein: Maybe. But as I said, you don't want to know.

Volrath: Oooooook, but why did you pick Defiler?

Nalfein: Mainly because OORei is obsessed with Dark Sun right now and also Defilers are just so cool!

As he says this Nalfein looks over into the redshirt sleeping quarters.

Nalfein: I need to cast a spell, (looks to Volrath) hand me dat baby.

Volrath: *sigh*

He procceds to pull out a human child that Volrath stole from a nearby village and hands it to Nalfein. As Nalfein takes the baby, it quickly shrivels up and Nalfein is now holding a fireball in his hand.

Nalfein: :devil:

He then proceeds to hurl the fireball into the redshirt's sleeping quarters, and a massive explosion follows as every redshirt in the area is incinerated.

Volrath: Wow, that was your biggest fireball yet.

Nalfein: (tears forming in his eyes) I know *sniff*, its so beautiful!

Volrath: But wait, I thought that Dark Sun was destroyed.

OORei: It was, but through the power of recon I restored the world of Athas.

Volrath: I hate you with all of the loathing that I once reserved for the creators of Castlevania.

OORei: :D

Volrath: And is Sorcerer King what I think it is?

Nalfein: Most likely, yes.

Volrath: But don't you need Psion levels to even reach that class?

Nalfein: Normally yes, but because OORei and I both agree that psionics are just a crutch for those who are incapable of casting magic. Side effects include, insanity, nausea, vertigo, skin irritation, shortness of breath, heart palpitations, memory loss, death, and love of the first D&D movie.

Half the crew: HEY!

Terra: Umm, hello, I can use both psionics and magic.

Nalfein: :smirk: And that's why you think your wife is still alive.

*KABOOOOOOOOMMMMM*

Nalfein: (as he reforms) Owowowowowowowowowowowowowowowowowowowow owowowowowowowowow.

OOC: Yes, I will explain what the Sorcerer King prestige class does for those of you who don't know, but for those of you who do know *glares at OOUrial*, please don't say anything yet.
Paulon

03-15-07, 11:22 PM		OOC: As I recall, one of the other Ubers did a non-arcane variation of the Sorcerer King stuff once. *shudders*
rampant

03-16-07, 01:32 AM		Satnak - You do know that at its best and most stable that progression is pain incarnate right?

Nalfein - ..... AWWWW DAMMMIT!
------------------------------------------

Teiza - HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO REPEAT MYSELF!!! NO SENTIENTS YOU BLOOD HAPPY FREAKS!!! THEY TASTE ALMOST AS BAD AS THE LOT OF YOU SMELL!
Kaizer_Ryu

03-16-07, 09:22 PM		OOC: As I recover from calling in Chuck Norris to get rid of that damn Writer's Block (I told him it called him a pansy and didn't get the minimum 5 miles away when he gave it a roundhouse kick to the face in time), I came up with this little digression to the 4-swords/taversing the Zelda universe plotline. Thanks once again to Legendary Frog.

IC:

Miko's slumber party

Nelia: So, Miko. Tell the truth. Do you have a crush on Lilly?

Miko: I'm not telling you.

Nelia: Come on, tell us!

Elina: Spill the beans, girl!

Miko: ...yes... :blush:

Nelia & Elina: *giggling*

Miko: What? You all do!

Nelia: Oh. Right.

Elina: Oh yeah... :cloud9: ...What about you, Ganondorf? :smirk: Any secret crushes?

Ganondorf: *lying on the bed* Melissa Mirron and I used to be an item, but she turned traitorous. :mad: I imprisoned her in a statue! Now she is nothing to me!

Lilly: *watching in the shadows* (i.h.h.) :D Oh, yeah! Here we go! Pent up rage!

Ganondorf: Whenever I think about it I just... *sniffle* I-I just... *buries his face in his hands* :weep: Booo hooo hoooo! :weep:

Lilly: (i.h.h.) :uh-huh: Oooookay... First the crying, THEN the rage!

Ganondorf: Oh, whenever I get upset I eat!

Despondent, he picks up a bowl of chocolate and begins chowing down.

Lilly: (i.h.h.) :twitch: GET WITH THE RAGE ALL READY!

Ganondorf: *puts down the bowl* I...I'm sorry. I lost control. ...say, I've got an idea that's to DIE for. :devil:

Lilly: :hides: :twitch: (i.h.h.) It's the rage! I know it is!

Ganondorf: Let's do the Chicken Dance!

Lilly: :twitch: :twitch: *turns to the screen* There you have it. Undeniable proof that Ganondorf will one day come and smite us all. Smite us I say! Smite us GOOD! :shifty: They...just can't see it yet. Are they blind? Blind as a Keese if you ask me. Oh, they'll see it. I'll MAKE them see it! They'll call me crazy, but I'M not crazy! I'm the only one who's NOT crazy!

Blossom: *SLAP*

Lilly: *on the ground* :crazy: Ooooo, pretty stars...
rampant

03-16-07, 09:27 PM		Dorvos - Is this a good idea Teiza?

Teiza - I promised fun, I never said anything about good.

Ash - What are you two doing up here?

Dorvos - Borrowing Cole.

Ash - Oh ok then ... Wait what!!

Teiza - *grabbing cole and slipping into the shadows with the boys in tow* We'll bring him back!

Ash - Well now, should I be worried or just having my *** reinforced to take all the laughing that is sure to follow?
Charles Phipps

03-16-07, 09:32 PM		I've been waiting like months for that spoof Kaizer!

:-)

Your writers block WAS bad.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-16-07, 11:04 PM		Sarah: Lame.

Elina: It's not that bad.

Sarah: We're collecting :censored: ing INSRUMENTS! What does that have to do with getting off this freaking island?!

Nelia: Weren't you listening to that wise old owl that is obviously a plot device to lead us through the game?

Sarah: *coughs up a feather* :eek: :shifty:

Elina: :nonono: *sigh*

Nelia: We're trying to wake the Wind Fish so that s/he/it can get us off the island since our ship was wrecked in a storm.

Lilly: *returns* This island makes no sense! There's like five people, almost no food sources, random hermit enclaves without even a DOOR to defend them from the viscious beasts, and more dungeons then there are inhabitants!

Elina: That's Legend of Zelda for you.

Nelia: Aren't you a cute widdle doggie? Yes you are. Yes you are!

Chomp-chomp: :drool: Arf! *chain wags*

Lilly: You just had to give that thing the bow, didn't you?

Chomp-Chomp: :mad: Grrrr...

*CHOMP*

Lilly: MY HAND!

Blossom: Trading random crap to get something cool at the end is part of Legend of Zelda as well.

Lilly: *still attached to the Chomp* But who the hell is going to need a can of DOG food?!

Sarah: :drool:

Lilly: None for you.

Sarah: :allalone:
Charles Phipps

03-17-07, 01:17 AM		Lilly: Okay, we've finally gotten to the Twilight Princess game.

Sarah: *BARK*

Elina: What's wrong with Sarah?

Sarah: Woof! Woof!

Lilly: Well, bad news is the fact that because Link becomes a wolf in this game, Sarah's mind has been fried and she's now fully a Dog-Girl.

Sarah: *rolls over*

*Lilly gets down and starts rubbing her tummy*

Elina: Hey! That's my rubbing!

Lilly: Sarah gets dibs because the DM is always mean to her.

Elina: Yowwwwwwwwl!

Nelia: I can rub your tummy!

Elina: I'm not really...

*Nelia rubs her ear*

Elina: :drool:

Blossom: You people are very strange.

Lilly: Well, Tirmek isn't here to mock me and that's all that matters.

Tirmek: Loser.

Vaati: How could you skip me!?

Tirmek: Leaving me behind was Lilly's idea wasn't it?

Vaati: This was all my plot!

Lilly: Sarah...sic!

*Sarah leaps over at Vaati and grabs him in her jaw before running off*

Vaati: AHHHHHHHHHH!

Tirmek: Huh, that was easy.

Lilly: Vaati's secretly a Ninja. She'll probably bury him with all the others in the backyard.

Tirmek: So whose exactly is going to be revealed as secretly Ganondorf now?

Nelia: Muhahahahaha..

*her eyes glow*

Tirmek: Oh crap.

*Khyber manifests*

Elina: Oh :censored:!
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-17-07, 08:21 AM		Nelia: Muhahahahaha..

*her eyes glow*

Tirmek: Oh crap.

*Khyber manifests*

Elina: Oh :censored:!

Sithis: *scrying* :censored:

He rises, knocking the crystal ball over in his haste. somthing had to be done quick. there was no way the could stand against Khyber... Not without a little help.
Sithis removes some chalk from one of the draws on his desk, and begins drawing a pentagram, after that he draws up three circles about it. within each band of circles he drew the required runes. and in the centre of the Pentagram he drew Khybers rune.

Sithis stepped away from the penticle and drew his own protective circle and then five summoning circles ( Triangle inside a circle). he stepped into his own circle. and began the first summoning chants.

Sithis: Spirits of Earth, Fire, Air, Water and Nether i conjour and bind you.

the five lesser summoning circles flared to life as each of the elemental monoliths formed within them. Sithis frowned slightly as he fixed their bindings...

Sithis: (ihh) I've never tried this before... i dont think anyone has. its only a theory, but if i can buy the others some time then its the best i've got.

Sithis: With the five elements bound, i wield the power of creation and by my will i Break them!

Sithis clenched his fist. the elementals screamed as they where torn apart, their energies being absorbed by their circles.

Sithis: Five Broken, With the broken i summon the whole.

in an instant, the circles about the main pentegram Flared to life as their energy transferred along the path of runes towards it. the Pentigram flared to life in a kelidoscope of colours. Sithis gritted his teeth as he dragged the subject through the nether world. somthing formed in the pentagrams centre, shadowy and insubstancial. Sithis snarled as it tried to break free of the wards.

Raising his ceremonial dagger Sithis let a crimson drop of blood pool on its tip. it dropped, splashing down on his circle. Sithis gasped as the summoning circle sealed... and Khybers Avatar stood within it.

( To be continued.)
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-17-07, 08:27 AM		*Khyber manifests*

Elina: Oh :censored:!
Suddenly a jet carrying the Becoming God flies overhead. The jet releases the robot, and it drops down to strike a pose before roundhouse-kicking Khyber into next week.

Lilly: This is supposed to be a Zelda spoof!

OOcat: Khyber's too big to be Ganon.

Bunny: Plus Zelda games aren't really known for being revolutionary in their endings. We wanted to change that.

Sithis: But what about my complex summoning ritual?!

13: You make snooze, we make lose.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-17-07, 12:17 PM		Tiamat: Try all you like, you can barely match that other little upstart. You cannot defeat me.

Becoming God: Nonsense. I just have to do a series of increasingly futile moves, maneuvers, and tactics as you beat me senseless till I pull out a supermove that takes you out in a single hit and everyone wonders why I just didn't do it in the first place.

Elina: I am REALLY getting tired of her.

Sarah: *comes back covered in dirt* Hey, guys, what'd I miss? *looks at Tiamat* Oh, for the LOVE OF-!

-----

Motoko: Do you hear me?! Khyber has manifested again and your daughters are in mortal danger!

Lisa: She's just being a worrier, hon.

Terra: Yes, dear...

Motoko: Dammit! I've had enough of this! You're wife is not here and your inaction is going to get those girls killed!

Lisa: Even if she's right, they can take care of themselves. We raised them strong, you know that.

Terra: I know dear...

Motoko: (i.h.h.) :censored: ! She's completely lost it.

OOC: Don't do anything with this part just yet. And only Terra can "hear" Lisa. And Charles, are we taking care of Khyber THAT way, or is that for later? (You know, THAT way? ;) )
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-17-07, 12:24 PM		Scowling Sithis stops the ritual, breaks his defensive circle and diffuses the energy.

Sithis: (ihh) Hmm... perhaps i could modfiy that circle for later use...

he raises a hand and all the chalk lines and runes vanish, leaving the floor completely clean.
stretching slightly he picks up the crystal ball and replaces it. he begins scrying on the battle once more, waiting to see if his assisatance is required.
Charles Phipps

03-17-07, 04:05 PM		Lilly: Man, we are fricked! We don't have the silver arrows yet!

Sarah: At least I have the magic wand!

*Sarah begins spinning around and glowing before bright psychadelic lights appear around her before she's in a miniskirt*

Sarah: HALT EVIL DOER! IN THE NAME OF THE MOON!

Lilly: Sarah, are you on drugs again?

Elina: Sithis, we could really actually use....

*Becoming God bounces behind them, battered about*

Blossom: I'm suddenly very glad for my sixty levels.
rampant

03-17-07, 05:50 PM		Tirmek - You know the big advantage of being zelda in this game, Your spells (when you're actually allowed to cast them) can stomp anything. To simulate this, I've been given a scroll of dragonslave...

Lily - Big deal

Tirmek - Admixtured with every element including force,

Lily - :mad:

Blossom - Still will that work?

Tirmek - and intensified

Kyhber - oh ****!
Charles Phipps

03-17-07, 06:02 PM		Lilly: Uhhhh, Tirmek, I point out that you're not a caster and...

Tirmek: OH FOR CRYING OUT LOUD LILLY! How difficult could it be! I just *READ* the damn scroll!

Lilly: If you don't have suitable experience, skills, and levels, you can't use it.

Tirmek: That's the silliest thing I've ever heard.

Lilly: Seriously, about the only thing that can be done without EP is using the bathroom and I took three ranks in "use toilet paper" just to be on the safe side.

Tirmek: Whatever. NOW KHYBER, PREPARE TO DIE AT THE HANDS OF MY SCROLL READING!

Lilly: Oh brother.

Tirmek: .....

Sarah: Tirmek, why did you stick the scroll in your ear?

Tirmek: I don't know.

Lilly: You failed in your casting roll.

Tirmek: BUT WHY IS IT IN MY EAR!?

Lilly: This is why you should have casters use the magical devices.

Tirmek: I need to go up a level. *Pulls out Book of Vile Darkness*

Lilly: No Tirmek! You're not a priest either!

Tirmek: So, what's the worst thing that could happen!

*Tirmek starts beating his head with the book*

Sarah: What's he doing?

Lilly: ....reading the book.

OOC: See http://www.vgcats.com/comics/images/061105.jpg for the inspiration.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-17-07, 07:02 PM		Johnny (from Caralot's dimesnion): Like, dude, I can handle it.

Lilly: :confused: WTF are you doing here?

Johnny: Goron sumo. Getting shot out of a cannon. Snowboarding over a bottomless pit. Grinding on wall tracks. This place has all the EXTREME one could ever want.

Lilly: I assume you have caster levels?

Johnny: Nope. *successfully reads the scroll*

Khyber: *über-pwnd*

Lilly: :eek:

Johnny: Like, dude, let go of your class. Embrace not knowing exactly what you can do.
Charles Phipps

03-17-07, 07:52 PM		Lilly: Obviously, we need to scare Khyber.

Elina: Scare Khyber?

Lilly: Yeah, Sarah, go brush your teeth and come back before your done.

Sarah: Okay.

*Sarah walks off*

Elina: What's this plan?

*Sarah returns with toothbrush in her mouth and foam*

Elina: AHHHHH RABIES!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-17-07, 09:54 PM		Elina: AHHHHH RABIES!
Elina: Wait, why am I being so scared? We're both immune to at least those sorts of diseases. :confused:
************
Deep inside Elina's brain…………

OOcat: They're going to get mad at us. :nonono:

13 (fidling with some circetry): They're always mad at us. It's how we know we're doing our job. :D

Silver: Speak for yourself. :P People actually like what I do.

Bunny: Only because they're idiots. :bored:
Charles Phipps

03-17-07, 09:56 PM		Sarah: Err....we got kriffed in 3.8 edition.

Elina: WHat!?

Sarah: We can now be drugged, get diseases, and get drink.

Elina: YAY! ALCOHOL!
rampant

03-17-07, 11:37 PM		Sarah - We're too young to drink.

Elina - DAMN YOU KAIZER!!!
Charles Phipps

03-18-07, 02:28 AM		OOC: I think everyone will like what me and Kaizer have planned.
rampant

03-18-07, 02:40 AM		Momo - :evillaugh

Dies - :evillaugh

Scias - .....:evillaugh

Nina - My spine is cold.

Teiza - :evillaugh

Corre - :evillaugh

Dorvos - I can only assume this cannot end well.

Cole - :evillaugh

Lady - :evillaugh

Schroedigger - *Holding up a small box with a button on it, and a cord leading to the main cannon batteries* AT LAST ULTIMATE POWER IS MINE!
ratslinky

03-18-07, 03:34 AM		Gaz: Aw not Khyber again *steps into his closet and picks up something that might distract Khyber then teleports to the scene of the action* Hi guys I have a couple of ideas that will probably fail but will be fun first *Brings out a crystal shard speak a command word the whole area is filled with a blinding light and then it fades to reveal...*

Jarlot Senior: Hi honey

Khyber: Pff you really are stupid *uses magic to throw Jarlot senior away*

Gaz: Okay next *Pulls out another crystal speaks the command word and a portal opens to reveal...*

Crystal: So then I said yeah but he was like nah and then *but before she was finished Khyber blew her up*

Gaz: Okay last try Kybr u sukzor and u wll b 0wnz0ed by my 133t skillz

Khyber: *With her hands firmly over her ears* Ha even worst than the last to I can just stop listening

Gaz: *Telepathically* rofl eat t3l3pathy rofl u ar so 5tupid lolz

Khyber: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! :weep:

OOC: Any moderators please not that this use of leet speak was simply to get laughs so please don't ban me
ratslinky

03-18-07, 06:22 PM		OOC: This is something I forgot to post

*At the same time as Khyber is crying like a big baby because used leet speak on her*

Elina: Please make him stop :weep:

Lilly: The pain the pain :weep: *Bang* what was that?

Sarah: My ears :weep:

Blossom: What are you guys crying about?
Kaizer_Ryu

03-18-07, 06:47 PM		Tiamat: pH00L1$|-| /\/\0r74L! j00Z |<|\|0\/\/ |\|07 \/\/|-|@ j00Z R d34L1|\|9 \/\/17|-|!

Gaz: :banghead: IT BURNS!!!!

Tiamat: Now that we've established who exactly can pwn who, where were we? Oh, yes. I was about to kill you.

Terra: I thought we weren't going to directly interfere?

Sarah: :D Mom!

Tiamat: Oh, how nice of you to show up. It just seems the rules have changed. This one *points to the Becoming God* has taken matters into his own hands, as have you.

Terra: I'm only here because Motoko wouldn't shut up about it. I don't need to interfere.

Tirmek: What?! This is :censored: ing Tiamat! Even my Dragonslave spell barely scratched her!

Terra: I'm sorry, Tirmek. I cannot be of any help here.

Lisa: They don't understand yet, but you made the right decision. They won't get anywhere relying on you all the time.

Lilly: *whispered to Elina* Something's not right. She'd never leave us this outclassed.

Elina: I know, and I think I know who's behind it. We need to snap her out of it or we're all dead.

Before they can think further, Tiamat decends upon them.

OOC: Ok, leave Terra as she is, but otherwise go for the fighting. And remember, the kids are supposed to be more or less outclassed.
Charles Phipps

03-18-07, 07:12 PM		Lilly: Well, thankfully I've been working on a much more powerful spell than the Dragonslave.

Tirmek: Oh no.

Lilly: Basically, the first spell blows up a sun and harnesses it's power to....

Tirmek: NO!

Lilly: Do you have any idea how many stars we have in the universe?

Tirmek: WE ARE NOT DOING THAT SPELL!

Lilly: They'll never miss just one!

Tirmek: NO!

Lilly: Fine! The second spell exposes me to lethal levels of Gamma radiation.

Tirmek: Sounds good so far.

*Lilly then pulls an X-ray machine on him and photographs himself a few thousand times*

Tirmek: So, aside from giving you cancer, what does that acc....

*Lilly doubles in size*

Tirmek: Oh Crap.

*Lilly doubles in size again*

Tirmek: What the hell!?

Elina: This is why you should read more comic books.

Tirmek: I only read Betty and Veronica with the occasional Spiderman.

*Lilly turns green*

The Incredible Sulk: THE MADDER SULK GETS! THE STRONGER SULK GETS!

Tirmek: Oh brother. Someones been trolling for new Templates online.

Elina: According to this, he gets a +60 to his strength score.

*Lilly starts punching Khyber*

Tirmek: Well he can use his 63 strength to distract for our escape.

Blossom: :sad:

Tirmek: What's wrong?

Blossom: I was hit with Tiamat's Shadow Dragon Breath! I'm only 20th level now! I suck!

Tirmek: :twitch:
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-18-07, 07:44 PM		And yet still Lilly is still unable to beat Tiamat.

Lilly: SULK NOT UNDERSTAND! THAT MAKE SULK MAD!

Becoming God: Do you not know anything about combating giant monsters, young warrior? You can never defeat the rediculously oversized opponent without combining robots. Quickly, we must merge our bodies to defeat this foul creature!

Elina:………………:bored: Did that sound dirty to anyone else?

Sarah: :bored: Oh yeah.

Tirmek: It would certainly defeat Tiamat, that's all I can say.
rampant

03-18-07, 09:06 PM		Lily - Do you have to be snarky? Is it some sort of genetic compulsion or something?

Tirmek - Yeah pretty much.

Lily - This is why everyone hates Rakshasa. Hey where did he go?
-------------------

Standing on Tiamat's Blue head

Tirmek - Hey ugly!

Blue head rolls its eye upward.

Tirmek - *FIST OF THE MORTAL FLAME*

A blast of pale yellow flame spreads out from the impact of Tirmek's claw and puts out the blue's eye. The blue head bucks him off in its pain.

Tiamat - You're not the only one who can make over the top anime references. DRAGON OF THE DARKNESS FLAME!!!

As the massive serpent of black fire erupts forth from the wound Tirmek (still falling) gathers the pale fire once more.

Tirmek - True, but unlike you, I can improve on them.

A spark of yellow flame buries itself in Tiamat's attack seemingly consumed until the black fire descends upon Tirmek and instead of wiping the half-breed from existance it merely burns severely, looping and spiraling around the young d'Tharmis it erupts into yellow flame and returns to the wound from whence it sprang searing the entire blue head to nothing more than roasted meat.

Tiamat - WHAT IS THIS!

Tirmek - *coughs up a cloud of oily smoke* Its called: All consuming hand of mortal flame. *hits the ground* *THUD!* Ouch, i can't feel my legs... YOU ***** YOU RUINED MY DRESS!

Sarah - DEATH TO THE LIZARD HUMPER!

Ivy - HEY!

Sarah - I didn't mean you.

Elina - What the hell are you doing here?
------------------

:monk: prize for the first one to guess where the first two effects came from
Charles Phipps

03-18-07, 09:17 PM		Fist of the North star?

;-)
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-18-07, 09:24 PM		Sarah - DEATH TO THE LIZARD HUMPER!
13: I thought we just got Elina over this. :confused:

Bunny: Since when do dragons hump enough lizards to qualify?

Silver: :mad: That joke's getting old.
Charles Phipps

03-18-07, 09:53 PM		Sulk: Mmmmm Pretty Doggie girl.

Elina: UHhhhhh!

*Elina is snuggled close*

Elina: Oh my, you certainly are....built.
rampant

03-18-07, 10:19 PM		OOC: Sorry phips it's not that, Tirmek's not ready for that yet.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-18-07, 10:51 PM		Tiamat: You insensitive pr*ck...! *Blue head regens* Do you have any idea how much that stings? :mad:

Tirmek: Wow, you weren't kidding about the awesome regen.

Terra: *playing cards with no one* Your turn, hon.

Tirmek: Grrrrr...

*CHOMP*

Tirmek: SON OF A B*TCH THAT HURTS!

Sarah: Let my boyfriend go you five-headed dragon wh*re!

Tiamat: Sticks and stones, little one, but if you want some... *FLAME BREATH*

Activating the ice elemental function of her gauntlets, she manages to cancel it out and create a great deal of steam, only to be hit with the followup lightning breath.

Elina: Sarah!

Lilly: SULK SMASH!

Sulk Lilly punches Tiamat in the White Dragon throat, causing her to drop Tirmek. She counters with a tail lash and knocks him back as the Becoming God attempts to grapple the Black and Red Dragon heads.

Tiamat: *Green Dragon head* You're really starting to annoy me. *Acid Breath*
rampant

03-18-07, 11:34 PM		Tirmek - Well if I can't kill you, I'll settle for annoying you. *SUPER KAREOKE ATTACK*

Sarah - RUN AWAY AND COVER YOUR EARS!

Tirmek - HOOOOOOOOOMe home on the raaaaaange
Charles Phipps

03-18-07, 11:41 PM		OOC: That's pure evil!

IC:

Sarah: This is hard.

Blossom: You mean, the fact we've fought this creature for 30 rounds without barely scratching it?

Sarah: No, I mean standing in this line pose all this time.

Blossom: I don't understand.

*Sulk walks forward and PUNCHES Tiamat*

*2000 damage appears over Tiamat*

Sarah: Now Elina will go.

Elina: HEALING POWER MAGIC!

*Everyone goes back to full hit points on the heroes side*

Tirmek: Monk punch!

*Tirmek steps forward and punches*

Sarah: Now it's my turn. I mean, can't we all just attack her at once?

Blossom: I don't get how that would work. I can't attack until you're dead anyway Sarah.

Sarah: Yeah. Then Elina heals me and I replace you again.

Blossom: No one said Combat was Simple.

*Player selects Dog Bite attack*

*Sarah bites Tiamat*

*300 damage*

Sarah: All this for the frickin Wind Orb.
Charles Phipps

03-19-07, 01:07 AM		Tiamat: Can you truly stand against my power!? HA!

Lilly: If I could be a superhero...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zS6o11CE-wc

Tiamat: Okay...
rampant

03-19-07, 01:52 AM		Tirmek - Ok let me see if I have the hang of this tb-combat *selects throw: (itchpowder)*

CRITICAL HIT!

Green head - ITS IN MY MOUTH THE ITCHING! IT WON'T STOP ITCHING!!!

Red - *CHOMP*

White - Good now we just regrow it next turn good as new.

Elina - *select blade weaving: ( scythe + entangle )*

Blue - OUCH!

Sarah - *selects: RAGE!!!* HOWLLLLLLLLL

Tiamat - *selects: regenerate*

Green - Puny mortals I- AAAHHHHHHHHHHHH THE ITCHING WON'T STOP!

Tirmek - I do believe we have found a strategy.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-19-07, 03:33 AM		Tiamat: *scratching* Oooooo, that feels good. Ah well. Prestidigitation

Tirmek: Crap. There are times I hate that spell.

Tiamat: *Poison Sting*

Tiamat swiped her tail at Tirmek, trying to impale him. The boy managed to dodge, but she still clipped him. Though not a full dose, the poison was enough to make him quite ill.

Tiamat: *Dual Acid Breath*

The acid from both the Green and Black Dragon heads struck Sulk Lilly, making him quite angry but also causing him quite a lot of pain. Her rage in full swing, Sarah took on the Red Dragon head, punching out it's eyes each time they regenerated and trying to claw through it's steel-like hide. The White Dragon head chomped at Elina, trying to keep her from reaching Tirmek and curing the poison (and succeeding so far). The Blue Dragon head's Lightning breath sent the Becoming God for a loop, testing it's circutbreakers to the limit.

-----

Momo: *scrying* :mad: Maybe next time he'll listen when I tell him I'm not finished upgrading yet.

-----

Tirmek: How much HP can she have?!

Tiamat: If you can actually find a way to hurt me, maybe I'll tell you.

Elina's screams rang out as the White Dragon head connected. Somewhere along the lines, her shadow abilities had failed. Amid the haze of pain and the crushing jaws, she could only guess that Tiamat had something to do with this as well. Tiamat had already completely absorbed her mother in an illusion, so why not more? And she knew it was an illusion most cruel. The one Terra wanted to believe the most. The Becoming God was keeping them alive by drawing most of Tiamat's efforts, but he was not enough. They needed more to win.

-----

Terra: Elina...? Elina, what's...going on?

Lisa: There you go again. You can't rush off every time things aren't going as well as they could.

Terra: But-

Lisa: Now, now. Trust me on this, hon.

Terra: ... (i.h.h.) Something...nagging at me. What is it? Why do I feel uneasy about this?
Charles Phipps

03-19-07, 03:43 AM		Sulk: GRRRRRRR! Sulk in PAIN! What can I do!?

*Lilly's spirit appears*

Lilly: Sulk, you have to remember why we fight.

Sulk: Ghost Lilly want speak to me?

Lilly: Yes, remember when we used to solve mysteries with Elina and Sarah plus Tirmek when he was a huge stoner?

Sulk: Wha?

*flashback*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h6ZcAI6Aq0Y

*flashback ends*

Sulk: Which one puppy dog?

Lilly: Oh that's my familiar. He's the Hound of Tindalos and a creature that hunts the sanity of mortals.

Sulk: Ah. Sulk know from time with Doctor Mystic in the Defenders.

Lilly: Yes, our old Mentor.

*A man who looks identical to Vincent Price appears*

Doctor Mystic: Lilly, now is the time to use the Ultimate Spell!

Lilly: We already tried the Dragonslave!

Doctor Mystic: No no, the OTHHHERRR spell.

*wink wink*

Lilly: Oh right! SULK! TIAMAT IS MADE OF CHOCOLATE!

*Sulk charges and bites the giant dragon*

Elina: Guys, we're running out of healing here!
rampant

03-19-07, 03:55 AM		Tirmek - Ok I've pumped his brain full of weird crap over the years, but where did that come from?
------------------------------------------------

Kanatash - *whistle*
------------------------

Tirmek - Ok new plan, leave Lily and Jarlot to die while we escape.

Sulk and Becoming god - HEY!
Charles Phipps

03-19-07, 04:25 AM		OOC: When even Tirmek is freaked out, you know you've done your job.

IC:

Sulk: Fuzzy Kitty Man right, despite being anyxhole. Sulk no want to die and Sulk leave.

Lilly: Sulk, we can't leave. Can you imagine what would happen if we abandoned our true love Elina?

Sulk: Hmmmmm.

*The picture in Sulk's head*

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/a/ac/Ultimatehulk2.jpg

Lilly: Uhhh....okay, bad example...
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-19-07, 09:11 AM		*The picture in Sulk's head*
………
Lilly: Uhhh....okay, bad example...
Silver: :twitch: Can't……choose……Elina……worked so long on it………too many girls…………:ghosted:

Bunny: Don't worry, folks. She'll be fine as soon as someone makes a dirty joke.
**********
Lilly: Hey, I've got it! We'll just keep cutting heads off until it regenerates too many and falls over from circulation problems!

Tirmek: It's only regenerating one head per head cut off!

Lilly: Oh. Right.
ratslinky

03-19-07, 06:34 PM		Gaz Prime: Ouch that would have taken me out of the fight for good but luckily my E.B.N.E plays world of warcraft so I've heard worse now *The two other Gaz's appear* go get them

Gaz 2&3: Yes master *The to Gaz's charge Tiamat's blue head. Phasing into ethereal as they go*

Tiamat: Fool *The blue head breath's trans dimensional lightning onto Gaz 3*

Gaz 3: Ha got past you die *Draws two short swords and stabs them into Tiamat's nose up to their hilts then he straps his feet to them and starts sending various whelm attacks at the blue head*

Tiamat: Ha really I expected better from you

Gaz Prime: Yes I bet you would and I will deliver Faceless One grant me the gift of your power

The Faceless One: Sorry buddy can't right now I've got a poker game with Kol Korran and Dol Arrah but Aureon might be free see if Elina can contact him

Gaz: Okay the was a bit underwhelming. Elina can Aureon be of any help to you?
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-19-07, 08:27 PM		A ball of fire crashes into Tiamat's white dragon head. i turns, to see Sithis clad in his battle gear smoke rising from his one black gloved hand.

Sithis: What ever happened to the days where gods didnt meddle in the affairs of mortals? * Hellrime Lightning bolt*

Sithis turns into a swirling cloud of dust to avoid the white heads ice breath. reforming several feet away he unleashes a third spell, this time a an Eldritch Chained Scorching Ray, each bolt striking a different head before richocheting onto the others.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-19-07, 08:29 PM		Sithis: What ever happened to the days where gods didnt meddle in the affairs of mortals?
Commentary Crew: :bored:
rampant

03-19-07, 08:48 PM		Sithis - Respectable gods

Bunny - HEY!
Kaizer_Ryu

03-19-07, 09:52 PM		All five heads laugh in tandem, and especially creepy sound to the ears of the beleaguered combatants.

Tiamat: Oh, this is the best time I've had since unleashing Sutekh! You mortals always try so hard regardless of the odds against you.

Tiamat begins glowing as waves of profane energy overwhelm all present.

Tiamat: But, alas, I'm growing bored of this farce.

The gargantuan five-headed avatar of Khyber begins mutating.

Tirmek: Oh hell.

Sithis: Is that even allowed?

-----

Terra's mindscape

Terra: I feel...ill. Something...something very bad is happening...

Lisa: It is not your place to interfere. This is something they must overcome.

Terra: I can't...even feel the shadows...the girls have been cut off...!

Lisa: They have more than your genetic legacy. Do not concern yourself with something so trivial.

Terra: Trivial? Trivial?! Since when have you spoken so of our children?!

Lisa: Calm, love. I meant the loss of one ability. They are not helpless anymore.

Terra: No...no, this is wrong... This is all wrong!

Lisa: What do you mean?

Terra: This is... Oh, Tiamat, this is low, even for you. How could I not see it before?!

Lisa: Honey...you're scaring me.

Terra: Don't you 'honey' me, you manipulative b*tch! HOW DARE YOU TAKE HER FORM!

With a leap, Terra grabbed the fake by the throat. Her eyes burned with a hate greater than any she had ever known. She had endured endless manipulations throughout her life, but this was too much.

Terra: Get out of my head.

Tiamat: :smirk: Very well. But I expect you to put up a better fight than your children and their little friends.

-----

Elina: This is bad. Very bad.

Lilly: Sluk not like freaky new dragon lady!

Tiamat had doubled in size and taken on more abberant traits. Tentacles had sprouted everywhere, her heads had twisted into new, even more terrifying forms. Her front claws dripped acid and her tail had split into three parts, each with it's own stinger.

Becoming God: *FLASHY TRANSFORMATION SEQUENCE* Booyah (http://www.snafu-comics.com/images/castMegas.jpg)!

OOC: I'll do Terra's entrance in a bit, but Tiamat has stopped playing with her food. Right, you've been warned.
Charles Phipps

03-19-07, 10:27 PM		Elina: You *****! You killed my mom!

Khyber: Silence fool.

*Tiamat then breathed out a horde of five breath weapons at once in a single attack focused on Elina*

Sulk: SULK HELP ELLIE!

*That was when Lilly absorbed all five blows and lied very still on the ground*

Elina: LILLY!
rampant

03-19-07, 11:22 PM		Tirmek - :dancin:

Kyhber - What are you so happy about?

Tirmek - I get to watch him die :D
Charles Phipps

03-19-07, 11:32 PM		Sulk: Sulk want to say one last thing.

Tirmek: What?

Sulk: SULK SMASH!

*Sulk punches Tirmek*

Elina: Oh THAT helps us in this fight!

Sarah: *follows Tirmek flying through the air with her eyes* Wow....that was some punch.

Elina: *turns around* Yeah....

Sarah: Still going.

Elina: Uh huh....

Sarah: Going...

Elina: Going....

Sarah: Gone.

Elina: Where do you think he landed? Sarlona?

Sarah: Nah...maybe Lhazaar...
Kaizer_Ryu

03-19-07, 11:46 PM		A deafening roar shook the field of battle as a Great Shadow Wyrm tore through Tiamat's Blue Dragon neck. The lifeless head was consumed in Terra's shadow breath as Tiamat knocked her off. Though she would have easily outmatched the size of any living dragon, Terra was no more than half Tiamat's stature.

Tiamat: Yes, yes! Good! Struggle and fight! *attempts to regen the Blue head* Ah ha ha, you actually managed to wound me! Wonderful!

Terra dove straight through the ensuing breath attacks, passing unharmed as she phased out of and back into the Material Plane. Again she was at Tiamat's throat, this time the Black neck. Burying her claws into Tiamat's scaled body, Terra attempted a second decapitation. She was not so fortunate this time. Acid burned into her as Tiamat wrapped her tentacles around Terra and forcibly removed her. The action caused a gaping wound to open near the base of the Black dragon neck, but it remained attached as acid clouds spewed out of the opening. Tiamat slammed Terra's blinded form into the ground, barely missing the kids as they struggled to extricate themselves from the path of dueling goddesses.

Tiamat: Don't disappoint me now, little one. :devil: Where is your rage? What happened to all that wonderful anger you showed me?

Becoming God: Don't forget about me! *BLADE OF ONE MILLION SCREAMING OTAKU*

The beam of pure nerdiness finished what Terra had started and removed the last vestiges of the Black dragon neck. The head was quickly consumed by another shadow breath attack.

Tiamat: *breathing heavily* Ooooo, that's the stuff. Wonderful pain, how I missed you... *sneers at the attackers* You had best work faster than that. A wound and a fatal blow are two wholly separate things. *Blue head slowly begins to regen*

Terra: Regenerate as many heads as you like, I will tear them off every time, b*tch!

Going full shadow form, Terra impaled Tiamat with innumerable shadow spikes till she looked like a horrific rendition of a porcupine. Unable to move, Tiamat could only gurgle in pain as the Becoming God prepared for his ULTIMATE ATTACK.

Becoming God: Ready?

Shroedigger: Hmmmm, let's see... *looks at the control panel and sees the following buttons*

Missiles

Destroy the World

More Missiles

Destroy the World Again

All the Missiles

Destroy the World Worse

Save the World (out of order)

Shroedigger: :banghead: Dammit!

Momo: *appears on the monitor* Told you.

Shroedigger: Fine, we'll go with the next best thing. *hits All the Missiles*

Countless compartments opened up as missiles poured from the Becoming God onto the motionless Tiamat. Just as the missiles were about to hit, Terra phased out and reappeared several hundred feet away (like two steps for her right now) to avoid the blasts. Tiamat's roars slowly died away as the inferno engulfed her. When the blast cleared, nothing but a smoking crater remained.

Shroedigger: Well, that was easier than I tho-

The ground beneath Terra tore open as Tiamat reemerged. Before Terra could even react, Tiamat ripped her wings off in a spray of blood and flesh. Grabbing her neck, Tiamat swung Terra's stunned form around, smacking the Becoming God out of the sky before slamming Terra back to the ground. Now restored, all five of Tiamat's heads bit down on Terra, tearing away an arm and removing a good chunk of her torso as she stood on Terra's neck.

Tiamat: *swallows* Mmmmmm, you're quite flavorful, my dear. I may very well keep you alive after I've had my fill. What was that saying one of your little firends had? "Immortality isn't an advantage when all you know is pain." :evillaugh

Terra: *gurgle**choke*
rampant

03-20-07, 01:26 AM		Tirmek - Speaking of my aunt

Khyber - HUH?

Tirmek - I will admit, the 8-bit reject over there knows how get some distance.

Sulk - Must kitty always insult Lily?

Tirmek - Yes, anyway, I am so very tired of you, you dragon-lance wannabe.

Khyber - This is why everyone hates Rakshasa, the constant incessant insults.

Tirmek - Now I have come to the troubling realization, that I may be unable to kill you, due to the whole world collapsing thing.

Khyber - Is he trying for a one-way-ticket on the doom express? The arrogance.

Tirmek - So I guess I'll settle for slowly converting you into a mindless imitation of your former self.

Tirmek raises his bruised and burned arm once more,this time a speck of green energy pulsates above the bloody palm.

Khyber - :bored: That's just dissapointing *turns away to deal with Terra*

Tirmek flicks the mote into one giant eye.

Kyhber - Ouch hey that stings!

Tirmek - Well that's it for me *collapses*

Elina - :eek:

Sarah - I didn't know he could do that.

Lily - I don't get it what's the big deal? He made her blink.

Elina - That looked like the stuff that they find all over the crater where Aunt Satnak fought Toren.

Sarah - That stuff is what happens when a deity gets its core contaminated. He must have used the spark from her dark dragon flame attack then supercharged it with some pretty twisted disrupters. Too bad he's not strong enough to make more. That little speck will take decades to really affect a progenitor dragon like Khyber, but 3,000 years from now she's gonna have some serious problems.

Lily - Am I the only one who thinks that's a tad petty?

Sarah - You think?

Elina - You've been hanging around Tirmek too much sis.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-20-07, 02:53 AM		Tiamat: Interesting...but I wonder if it will still effect me as I tear down this world and it's laws to rebuild it into that which dear Syberis died and Eberron locked me away to avoid?

As the Green head speaks, the other four continue to feed, tearing pieces off Terra's regenerating body and greedily gulping it down.

Tiamat: Or if it will even bother my true form, since this is merely my manifestation?

The clawed foot on Terra's neck stifles her roars of pain.

Tiamat: Or will the corrupted essense of a much lesser diety do anything at all? For once, I am unsure. But none of you will live long enough to see it happen, so it matters not.

Sulk: Now mean and creepy dragon lady being petty.

Tiamat: Perhaps, but a little gloating can only add to the enjoyment of my meal. :devil: *continues feeding*

Elina: :weep: Stop it! :weep:

Sarah: :weep: Mom, get up! Please! :weep:

OOC: That's it for tonight. Curse my lack of being Link and having to sleep. :mad:

I'm pretty sure we'll be wrapping this up tomorrow.
ratslinky

03-20-07, 09:45 AM		In her feeding frenzy Tiamat had failed to notice a lone figure climbing up her back and onto her head

Gaz: Now Mareth *In a small flash of light Mareth teleported in pointed her wand at Gaz activated it a and teleported out. The wand shot a tiny beam and it moved fast toward Gaz homing in on him. Gaz took out an immovable rod with a pointed tip then he threw the bar at Tiamat. It hit the eye of her right most head and stuck in it the the beam Mareth had shot hit the rod and it grew to the size of two dragons squished into the shape of an spear long*

Tiamat: Arrrrgh! Then the voice box activated and started to spew and incomprehensible 133t speak tentacles from the rod inserting them into the ear drum of each of her heads so all she could hear was the incessant 133t speak made by every World of Earth craft player in the world which amounted to 6'000'000 players world wide*
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-20-07, 10:09 AM		When we last left our protagonist—

Kitten: Hero.

—okay, hero Kitten, she had just come across—

Kitten: Confronted.

OOcat: She just happened to be where you were. That doesn’t count as “confronted”.

Kiiten: :mad: Fine.

—had just come across the arch-villain Errandis d’Vol in the dinner lounge of the Super-Villain casino.

Errandis: Hello, deary.

Kitten: Can the chatter, d’Vol! I’ve come to stop you and your evil plot to—

Errandis: This isn’t a very good place for a hero rant. (gets up slowly, using a little-old-lady cane) Come, let’s go to my secret lair where you can have the proper atmosphere for a good hero speech.

Kitten: I don’t give a F**K about atmosphere! I don’t give a f**k about tradition, “what’s done”, or any other excuse you’re going to give me for doing this in an inefficient and above all completely stupid manner! I’m not like those idiot super-heroes: I’m not going to get walked all-over when there’s justice to be done!

d’Vol doesn’t say anything, but just smiles, a smirk.

Kitten: What’s so amusing?

Errandis stomps her cane twice on the floor. Suddenly the two of them are standing in a huge sciency lab, on top of a raised circular platform with lines drawn on top and various bit of technology stuck around the edges.

Kitten: Wha…?

Errandis: Teleplatform. I’m serious, dear, a lounge is no place for your origin rant.

Kitten: Origin rant?

Errandis: The rant you give when you announce to the world that you are a villain.

Kitten: :confused:

FX demon: *dun, dun, DUN*
urial angel of death

03-20-07, 10:59 AM		Kerrith: *appears*

Sarah: How did you do that?

Kerrith: A wizard did it. :D

Sarah: :bored: Fine why are you here?

Kerrith: I know Tiamat's weakness.

Sarah: Sure you do.

Kerrith: Well Tiamat is the spoof on Ganon right?

Sarah: I guess.

Kerrith: Well we've finally got to the Twilight Princess spoof and in it Ganon has ADHD. *pulls out fishing rod*

Sarah: You've got to be kidding me.

Kerrith casts the fishing pole.

Tiamat: Oooh, pretty.

All of Tiamat's heads follow the fishing lure, giving the kids time for a few quick hits and Terra more regeneration.

Kerrith does a little jig.
Phantomcrossing

03-20-07, 11:17 AM		The door to below decks opens and pleasant whistling drifts out. Soon, a half giant figure in a cook's hat and apron backs out holding a large pot full of steaming foodstuffs.

Norbaz: ~whistling a jaunty tune~

The half giant turns, sees what's going on near the ship, and walks straight back into it below decks.
rampant

03-20-07, 05:51 PM		Schroedigger - *presses the button*

Sovereign paint in thousands of pastel colors explodes from the hold and goes everywhere, I mean everywhere.

Satnak - I'm torn between rage, and prideful amusement, you kids better hide before I make up my mind.
-------------------

Xendrik

Fire giant - What is this gunk?
-----------------------------------

Anduair

Peasant - What eez theez gunk?
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-20-07, 05:55 PM		Sithis, Splattered in paint, visibly shakes with rage.

Sithis: Do you have any idea how hard paint is to get out of silk? you better hope that your mother gets to you first you little Runt!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-20-07, 06:04 PM		Sithis: ……you better hope that your mother gets to you first you little Runt!
OOcat: I can't see Marish doing anything even remotely disciplinary.
**********
Cut to Marish wearing a dominatirx outfit complete with paddle.
**********
OOcat: To anyone not of legal age, is what I meant to say.
Charles Phipps

03-20-07, 07:52 PM		Khyber: Now for you my pretty.

*Khyber breaks her sword in her jaw*

Blossom: Please.

*Khyber is started to be bashed with Blossom's +5 shield*

Khyber: GAH!

Blossom: This is where I reveal my origin as the product of a super soldier experiment that gave me INCREDIBLE POWER during the Last War!

Khyber: GRRRRR!

*Blossom keeps hitting with shield*

Blossom: This ones for you Captain!
Kaizer_Ryu

03-20-07, 09:09 PM		Tiamat swats Blossom away with her tail, grabbing her with a tentacle and throwing her to the ground.

Tiamat: Such utter disrespect. So you all chose to leave this world bereft of dignity. A fitting end for your lot.

Grabbing Terra with three of her heads, Tiamat hurled her towards the children. With what remained of her consciousness, Terra returned to humanoid form so as not to crush them. The sight was not pretty. Her flesh was torn to shreds and blood flowed freely from the missing sections of her body. Despite her quick regeneration, it would be several minutes before she would look whole, and several more before she regained consciousness. Assuming she was allowed to.

Tiamat: The game is over. Your efforts are for naught. Sarah, it is time.

Everyone present turned to stare at Sarah, looking for an answer.

Sarah: :confused: :confused: :confused: ...ummmm, I'm sorry, what?

Tiamat: Have you forgotten what it is you bear? That which was meant for your sister has become your burden.

Sarah still looked confused, but both Elina and Tirmek immediately knew what she was refering to.

Elina: The Dragonmark!

Tirmek: Sarah, get out of here NOW!

All present were immediately struck with unbearable pain as Tiamat spoke again. It was not a language any of them recognized, not even Dark Speech could match the agony embodied in every word. It's malevolence was otherworldly, and every sound carried enough evil incarnate to make them want to claw out their own ears. Amid the haze, they could see the Syberis Mark of Death glow with an errie light and Sarah standing there as if she heard nothing. Finally, Tiamat ended her spell and returned to Common.

Tiamat: First, rid me of this annoyance.

Without a thought, Sarah raised her hand and aimed straight for Gaz 2. A bolt of necrotic energy shot from her hand and struck the young Changeling's double dead on. The double fizzled out of existance along side the other. The original had been spared the full effects, but the connection between himself and his double had given him a taste of the Mark's deadly abilities. Blood leaked from his nose as he fell to his knees and cluched his chest.

Tiamat: Not bad for a first try. Finish him off.

Elina: NO!

In desperation, Elina threw a mindblade club at Sarah's outstretched hand, causing her to miss Gaz and the plantlife behind him to wither and die instantly.

Tiamat: And yet you still struggle. Perhaps you need a taste.

Sarah shifted to hybrid form and took off after Elina. Elina fled, realizing that the Mark worked on contact as well. Sarah was easily the faster of the two, and quite possibly the fastest out of all of them. Elina took to the skies, knowing that Sarah's natural land speed wouldn't help her there, but there was only so long this deadly game of tag could go on. The long-range effect was still a threat as well.

Tirmek: Quick, she's buying us time! We have to snap Sarah out of this!

Kerrith: Um...I don't think we'll have that chance.

Tirmek looked up at the five-headed dragon Kerrith was pointing at.

Tirmek: Crap.

Tiamat: Now for some dessert after that nice meal. :devil:

Sulk: Sulk SMASH!

Becoming God: *ROCKET PUNCH*

Blossom: *SHIELD BASH*

The simultanious blows managed to throw Tiamat off balance long enough for them to scatter. Sithis and Tirmek took off in an effort to aid Elina as Kerrith warped Gaz to the relative safety of the ship. For her part, Elina had managed to avoid three shots and a grapple as Sarah's relentless pursuit continued.

Sithis: Can you think of a way to disable her without touching her or killing her?

Tirmek: One... I really hope she forgives me for this...

Tirmek whipped out a call stone with a small note reading "DO NOT USE UNLESS FACING CERTAIN DEATH". Activating it, he grabbed the small whistle that appeared.

Tirmek: Sorry!

With a deep breath, he blew the whistle. No sound seemed to emerge, but Sarah immediately siezed up and fell to the ground.

Elina: *covering her ears* All right, ALL RIGHT! YOU CAN STOP WITH THAT INFERNAL THING!

OOC: More later. Leave Terra down and Sarah controlled, but otherwise do anything you still want to for this plot fairly soon.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-20-07, 09:16 PM		OOC: More later.…………
OOC: Finish it, please, I beg you, there's only so much of über power I can stand. :weep:
Kaizer_Ryu

03-20-07, 09:25 PM		OOKaizer: It's always a pleasure doing business with you.

13: I think I've almost got him. Just keep up the drama, the unnecessarily drawn out action scenes, and throw in as much over the top power as you can.

OOKaizer: No problems there.

OOC: ;)
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-20-07, 09:46 PM		OOcat: OOOOOOO!!!!! *literal brainstorm*

Commentary Crew: :eek: RUN!!!!

OOcat: I NOW INVOKE THE ULTIMATE POWER!

*BOOM! RUMBLE!*

OOcat: COME TO ME………………RANDOM PLOT DEVICE!

A glowing meteor streaks out of the sky. As it falls it changes to reveal a sleek dragon form, a sinuous dragon more akin to Oriental types, yet still possessing wings.

Tiamat looks up.

Tiamat: Well look who decided to come back from the dead. My plans must truely be coming to fruition if even—

Bahamut smacks into Tiamat with all the force of a million Bigby Nukes. Tiamat tries to say something villainous and sarcastic, but Bahamut snaps off each head just as it regenerates.

Tiamat: Hey, I'm……tr………yingtogi………vea…………m…o…n…ologue …………here!

Bahamut just goes on edlessly weaving through Tiamat's heads and attacks and keeps her from having more than one or two heads at a time.

13: Wow, just like when I was a kid dragon, only more civil.

Silver: I think he's the first non-whipped male we've seen in a relationship.

OOC: Okay, so I don't entirely mind über power in pursuit of having fun.
rampant

03-20-07, 09:56 PM		The kid's paint wave arrives on the scene.

Khyber - Well this is an embarrassing position.

Tirmek - Great I smell like dragon butt.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-20-07, 10:13 PM		OOC: That's actually the best excuse EVER to do THIS:

IC:

Bahamut: Seems I've come back just in time.

Tiamat: Yes, but that will shortly be remedied. *fighting stance* To the Death!

Bahamut: No! ...to the Pain.

Tiamat: :confused: I don't think I'm quite familiar with that phrase.

Bahamut: I'll explain. And I'll use small words so that you'll be sure to understand, you wart-hog-faced buffoon.

Tiamat: It's been some time since you insulted me.

Bahamut: It won't be the last. To the Pain means the first thing you lose will be your feet, below the ankles, then your hands at the wrists, next your snouts.

Tiamat: :bored: And then my tongues I suppose. I killed you too quickly the last time, a mistake I don't mean to duplicate.

Bahamut: I wasn't finished. The next thing you lose will be your left eyes followed by your right-

Tiamat: :mad: And then my ears, I understand, let's get ON with it!

Bahamut: WRONG! Your ears you keep and I'll tell you why. So that every taunt by these mortals will be yours to cherish. Every child that laughs at your fallen visage, every peasant who calls out "Great Host, take pity on this wretched beast" will echo in your perfect ears. That is what "the Pain" means. It means I leave you in agony, wallowing in freakish misery forever.

Tiamat: :mymy: ...I think you're bluffing.

Bahamut: It's possible, pig. I might be bluffing. It's concievable, you miserable vomitous mass, that I'm not quite back up to snuff after so long out of the loop. ...then again, perhaps I have the strength after all. :smirk:
Charles Phipps

03-20-07, 10:40 PM		Lilly: Holy crap its Bahamut!

Blossom: The Ultimate Final Fantasy Monster!

Jarlot: You know what to do kids!

Bahamut: Uh oh.

*The three descend on Bahamut like lightning*

Sulk: Rat tail this *****!
rampant

03-20-07, 10:41 PM		Tirmek - WILL SOMEONE PLEASE GET ME OFF THIS *****'S ASS!!
Charles Phipps

03-20-07, 10:52 PM		Sulk: Sulk fail spot check.

*crunches on chew toy*

Tirmek: DAMMIT!
Kaizer_Ryu

03-20-07, 11:33 PM		Tirmek: Ow...ow...OW! Watch the fur!

Sithis: I don't have a lot of options here!

*RIP*

Tirmek: ...ow...

-----

Tiamat: Ok, I'm bored with this. The little ones may be able to avoid her with relative ease, but you will have a much harder time.

Bahamut: Taking the cowards way out, huh?

Tiamat: Just the most efficient. I've already killed you once. I don't need to prove I can do it again. Sarah, time to send this avatar packing.

Shaking off the effects of the whistle, Sarah turned to Bahamut, preparing to use the mark again.

Bahamut: This isn't over. Should you tear down this world, I will fight you again. And this time, Eberron will join me. You will not succeed.

Tiamat: We shall see.

A flash of power flew past and enveloped Bahamut. The great avatar disintegrated as Tiamat laughed gleefully. Syberis would not be able to manifest again.

Tiamat: Now, the whelp.

Sarah turned to Terra's still motionless form.

Tiamat: Do it.

As Sarah leaned down to grab her mother's hand and end her existance, a powder bomb exploded beneath her. While she coughed violently, Sarah felt a hand on the back of her neck and a spell take hold.

Sarah: Wha...? Where am I? What hap- Miko?!

The smoke cleared to reveal the half-fiend girl retracting her hand.

Miko: Well, at least the Dragons were good for something. Now finish this.

Sarah: What?

Miko: Send Tiamat where she belongs. Oblivion.

Sarah: But-!

Miko: :mad: You won't destroy everything! This is just the avatar! Or do you WANT her to manifest again?!

Tiamat: Fool! Destroy me and you destroy yourselves!

Sarah: ...even if that's true... *lifts her hand* You'll just end up doing that anyway.

Tiamat felt the sting as the Mark she herself had created was turned on her. So much work...all gone. But maybe not. Every evil scheme has a backup...

As Tiamat disintegrated, the Mark followed suit. The lines on Sarah's skin seemed to just boil away, leaving no trace.

Miko: They were right about that, too...

Sarah: Why did you go see the Dragons?

Miko: I figured out something. I've thought all these years that Elina was the one who made my life so miserable. After that mess with the Shadow, I figured it might have been him that did it. But now I know that it was Tiamat. When you took the hit for Elina that gave you that mark, you changed everything. The Elina of my time had the same mark on her skin, and talked an awful lot like Tiamat. I asked the Dragons for help in getting rid of her.

Sarah: Revenge?

Miko: Punishment.

OOC: There, all but the cleanup is over. Khyber and Syberis still live, but Tiamat and Bahamut are gone for good.
Charles Phipps

03-21-07, 12:38 AM		Which leaves Eberron to dominate all!

THE TRAVELLER HAS WON!
Paulon

03-21-07, 12:40 AM		Maybe Ketler can save the world from the Traveller if he crosses the streams.
rampant

03-21-07, 01:31 AM		OOC: I dunno I figured the traveller was sort of the patron bastard of the FF.

Jarlot - Isn't that patron saint?

OORampant - I know what I said.
------------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Hold on a *coughs up blood* sec.

Tirmek takes a slab of rock and plants it edge down in the ground.

Tirmek - :dancin: (weakly)

Lily - Unbelievable, bleeding internally, he still takes the time to dance on her grave.

ZZZZZIp

Tirmek - Turn around I'm almost through here.
Crystalforged

03-21-07, 01:49 AM		OOC: Looks like this idea came to me a little to late but, meh, what can you do? Just assume this post comes sometime before Tiamat gets taken out.



IC: In the middle of the battle, Kanatash suddenly ports in.

Tiamat: (turning green head to face him while the other four continue fighting) Hm, whats this? If I were you mortal, I would just leave now and I might ignore your interuption.

Kanatash: Alright for one thing lady, watch who you're calling mortal there. For a second, my wife/husband is freakier than you, and I don't just mean in the bedroom. Besides, I've gone through child birth, there's not much you can do now to scare me.

Tiamat: Uh, you'll have to excuse me if I say I have no idea what you're talking about.

Kanatash: Fine, I'll skip to the point. (pulls out a pair of reading glasses and a sheet of partchment) I have come to deliver this legal document to you. (holds out the partchment)

Tiamat: (picking up the patchment with a foreclaw) What's this? :ahem: A RESTRAINING ORDER?!

Kanatash: Correct. This is a document I had drawn up by our ships resident lawspeaker, Reman. It hearby states you must cease and desist from any attempts to destroy this world. Any attempt to destroy said world would be a breach of the copyright held on the destruction of aformentioned world by one, Deranged Lords, greatest of the Great Old Ones, which was filed via time paradox prior to formation of said world. This document is both legally and magically binding. I wish you a good day. (ports out)
rampant

03-21-07, 02:22 AM		Satnak - All right you little hellions, clean this stuff up.

Momo, Dies, Nina, Scias, Teiza, Dorvos, Lady, Corre, Schroedigger, Cole, A.W.L. - Awwwwww:(

OORampant - This oughta be good for a few laughs.
Charles Phipps

03-21-07, 02:38 AM		Sulk: Sulk decided not to become Lilly again.

Elina: :cloud9: He's big and stupid! Just like I like em!

Tirmek: Well, better than Lilly. He didn't have the big.

*WHAM*
Kaizer_Ryu

03-21-07, 02:56 AM		*insert scene of joyousness and hugs and such that I'll spare you due to it's absurd amounts of sappy dialogue and all things related*

Terra is busy trying to stay upright due to all four of her youngest hugging her tightly.

Serene: :D Looks like someone's popular.

Terra: I spent something like ten minutes apologizing for ignoring them, even if it was mostly Tiamat's doing. Want to know what their response was?

Serene: Are we looking at it?

Terra: :) Yep. *sniff* I have the best kids ever. How's Tirmek?

Satnak: He'll recover. He may not have your regenerative abilities, but he's one tough kid. ('pathing) How about you? I heard what happened from Sarah. Something like that isn't likely to go away quickly.

Terra: (back) Thank's for asking this way. I don't want to worry them...

Satnak: No problem. Well?

Terra: ...I can still feel her tearing at me. What I feel now is nowhere near what I felt then, but...I'm having trouble using my left arm without giving it away. I'm pretty sure Nina knows, though. She gravitated towards it and kept asking if I was ok.

Satnak: A master of souls, a berzerker werewolf, a thief of reality, a mad artificer/mecha-otaku, a dark magical-girl, and a healer that can sense pain. That's one hell of a brood there. ;)

Terra: :D I wouldn't trade them for the world. (out loud) Ok, kids, I've got a few things I need to take care of. Can you hang out with Aunt Satnak and Auntie Serene for a bit?

All four: YAY! *TACKLE*

Serene: Oof!

Satnak: What's up?

Terra: I have some things to sort out.

-----

Motoko: So you admit it.

Terra: Yes.

Motoko: I was right and you were psychotic.

Terra: *groan* Yes...

Motoko: And?

Terra: I guess...I'm sorry.

Motoko: You guess?

Terra: :rolleyes: I was being eaten and was almost erased from all existance. I think that counts against you.

Motoko: :mad: Why you ungrateful little-!

Sparks fly through the air between them as they glare at each other.

-----

Terra stood amid her now greatly reduced shrine to Lisa. With no body left, she had no grave to visit, so this would remain her and her children's place to remember her.

Terra: That should do it, hon...

She sat down next to a framed photo of Lisa, picked it up, and ran her fingers along the image.

Terra: I can apologize all I want, but it'll never undo what happened. ...I just...I wanted to believe you were there so badly... I couldn't stand the thought of being without you... I fell headlong into her trap, and didn't even notice the wholly different feeling I got from that fake.

She set the picture back down and placed her head on the table next to it.

Terra: I won't ask forgiveness, because I know I already have it. *chuckles* I can even hear you chiding me for worrying so much. You were always like that with me, as quick to forgive as I was to punish...

After staying silent for several minutes, she stood up again and smiled.

Terra: You know, I think you were right. No...I know you were right. I can do this on my own. I confused not wanting to and not being able to, just like you knew I would. So...don't worry, hon. I'll make sure to take good care of our children.

Terra walked towards the door, slowly opening it as she turned to look at the picture one more time.

Terra: Maybe someday...I can have as much faith in me as you did.
rampant

03-21-07, 03:19 AM		Scias - .....rrrrr

Mittens - mew (?)

Shred - meow (he wouldn't)

Tear - Mrrrrrr (he would)

Rip - meOW! (he is)

Scias - ....ARF ARF ARF!

Cats - :eek: MEROW! (RUN AWAY!)
---------------------------------------------

Tirmek - Uh? huh? where am I, and why can't I breathe?

Sarah - *hugging tirmek* :zzz:

Tirmek - Not again! You just won't let this joke die will you.

OORampant - Nope

13 - Not a bloody chance

Silver - Never

Bunny - I never get to have any fun.
ratslinky

03-21-07, 06:39 AM		OOC: Ah well there goes one of the last serious plot lines we will be able to have I mean we have defeated three gods so far kicked the dragons from Khyber to Siberys on top of everything else not much more to do except maybe have no more redshirts die but that is trying to do the impossible
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-21-07, 08:31 AM		OOC: Last serious plotline is a bad thing? Read the first word of this threads title. HUMOR. I'm not weeping.

Besides, we'll think up another one. We always do.

Oh, and Charles? I'll need Lilly back as Lilly at some point.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-21-07, 09:06 AM		When we last left our hero—

Kitten: STFU!

Right then, I'm calling my agent.

13: You rang? :D

Shutting TFU. :nonono:

Kitten: What's this cr*p I hear about me being a villain? Why would I be a villain?

Errandis: Oh, where do I begin?……………You're angry at the world and completely self-assured that what you do has to be the right way to do things. Classic villain.

Kitten: But I'm not evil.

Errandis: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Please dear, don't make me laugh. It's hard to believe that after living on that floating pile of chaos that you actually think that.

Kitten: What are you talking about? Evil is objectively evil, even on Eberron.

Errandis: That's just bad fluff design. In truth there's no such thing as evil. "Evil" is just a set of things that a group decides is not to be done, usually for their own mutual protection. Strip "evil" away and all you are left with in the difference between hero and villain is how assured they are that their actions are "right".

Kitten: But aren't there villains who do what they do out of pure self-interest?

Errandis: You're confusing "right" with "good" again. "Right" means whatever an individual decides is acceptable. Being greedy is acceptable to some. Being a psychopathic killer is acceptable to others.

Kitten: But…

Errandis: Let me show you some clips and you can decide for yourself……

Errandis snaps her fingers, and a ghostly orb descends between them. It begins to show images of various things that happen to the Forgotten Freedom crew, most prominently what Elina did with the souls of the dragon leaders.

Kitten: Aren't these images from five years in the future?

Errandis: This is known as a Magic Plotball. It always shows the most plotworthy images available, no matter when they are occuring.

Kitten watches, listens, and a nagging feeling comes over her mind that d'Vol really is right. She knew that most of the FF was admittedly-evil, but until she'd watched these images she'd never seen that the worst stuff was always purpetrated by the few people she'd thought of as "good". And when they did it they insisted that they were "right".

Kitten: :weep:

Errandis: Well?
********
Meanwhile a thouroughly burnt Ketler stumbles into the dinner lounge of the Super-Villain.

Lilly: Whoa! Hey, man, what happened to you?

Kelter: The building where I had my cr*ppy job blew up because a bunch of heroes were escaping. And now I'm here to say "thank you" to my brother for sticking me in that hellhole, talking to mororns all day…………

Lilly: Dude, I know exactly how you feel. I bet everyone does. Everybody's had cr*ppy jobs… (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Md2i6MWD4I&mode=related&search=)

Ketler laughs for a minute, then wanders into a door at the side of the stage.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-21-07, 08:33 PM		OOC: Last serious plotline is a bad thing? Read the first word of this threads title. HUMOR. I'm not weeping.Hey, the serious plot makes the humor that much better. That's my opinion, anyway.

Besides, we'll think up another one. We always do.Done and done. :evillaugh: (not now)

BTW, I love your plot so far, Silvercat.

IC:

Scias: ARF ARF ARF!!!

Shred: MREW! (Go for the shins!)

Mittens: ROW! (You first!)

Rip: MEOW! (Where's the squeaky toy?!)

Tear: *reads summon scroll* MROWROW! (Summon NPC V: Ninja)

Ninja: *puff of smoke* *bows* Hai.

*CHOMP*

Ninja: GAH! GET IT OFF ME!

Mittens: Mrrr. (How'd you know?)

Tear: Prrrowrow. Mrewprrrrrrr. (My underling hangs out with him all the time. Sarah's been showing him how to bury them so they don't run away.)
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-21-07, 10:14 PM		Hey, the serious plot makes the humor that much better. That's my opinion, anyway.
OOC: If we could avoid god-level stuff. They all tend to be like "Oh no, someone with a lot of power is doing evil and we can't stop it" up until the point they do. Über-evil gets boring after a while.
BTW, I love your plot so far, Silvercat.
Plot? :confused: What plot? I'm completely making this up as I go along.
Charles Phipps

03-21-07, 10:19 PM		I agree.

This was the climax of a very long running plot that leaves us with normal humor and characterization for awhile.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-21-07, 10:20 PM		OOC: If we could avoid god-level stuff. They all tend to be like "Oh no, someone with a lot of power is doing evil and we can't stop it" up until the point they do. Über-evil gets boring after a while.And we (me and Charles) are working on that. Why do you think we're taking out all the uber-evils? Tolerate it a little while longer, and I think you'll be happier. ;)

This was the climax of a very long running plot that leaves us with normal humor and characterization for awhile.Except for that one thing.

You know, that.

THEN we're done with uber-evil and can more or less screw around with our little plaything and make the Allmighty Hellcow cry in completely NEW ways. :D

Plot? :confused: What plot? I'm completely making this up as I go along.:D Exactly.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-21-07, 10:20 PM		"normal" humor and characterization
OOC: :D
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

03-21-07, 10:34 PM		OOC: Add in another vote for the 'Enough with the Uberiszaton' you'll note that Ive been phasing out Ash in favor of Chanse in my own attempt to limit the power Creap.
Charles Phipps

03-21-07, 10:54 PM		OOC: And Becoming God shall at last soon be reconcilled to being just a toy for Ketler.

....I'm keeping Sulk though.
rampant

03-21-07, 10:54 PM		OORampant - Gods are pussies! MORE POWER!
Kaizer_Ryu

03-21-07, 11:32 PM		OOC: I'm sure we can come to an arrangement which would be mutually beneficial, and allow us to avoid any unpleasant confrontations.

:D

I, for one, would like to see more villains along the lines of Tiamat, except minus the deific power and the hubris that comes with it. There'd have to be some kind of "no touchy" rule for the masterminds, and a limit on the "out-of-character"/"in-character" knowledge crossover (I'm looking at both you and me, rampant ;) ), or something like that for it to work, but it's by no means unfeasible. Smart villains who know their enemy well enough to keep them chasing shadows as well as recognize the limits of their own capabilities are potentially far more deadly than any god.

Anyway, I say we take a break from any overly serious plots for a bit. See what we can come up with now that we (I) have gotten the drama out of our (my) system (for now).
rampant

03-22-07, 02:10 AM		Tirmek - Well girls, guy, changeling, Lily...Wait a minute this doesn't concern you OUT!

Lily exits

Tirmek - Its that time of year again!:D

Sarah - Yay! Random violence!

Elina - Didn't we just do that?

Sarah - Yeah,but now we have no deep involved plot to worry about, and all those evil tricks like tying shoelaces together or stuffing the other guy full of itch powder actually work since they don't have to have some sort of deep insight.

Elina - You mean?:)

Gaz - Precisely.

Sithis - You can shoot'em when they monolouge:D

Xiath - *Chomp*

Tirmek - She just ate my new dress didn't she. I swear mother is encouraging her, she never eats my pants.
ratslinky

03-22-07, 03:29 AM		Gaz: Random violence :drool:

OOC: I just had an idea for a character. Don't know if it will stay funny for long but it might get a few laughs so here he is folks

Name: Scone-Scone

Race: Anthropomorphic Rabbit

Weapons: Flick-Knife, Hand Crossbow

History: See Sluggy Freelance. This is what happened after that. After finally killing Santa and the rest of the holidays Bun-Bun gathered all his belongings and after setting a bomb to destroy the world used Riff's Dimensional Flux Agitator to teleport him to paradise and of course he was instantly ported to the FF where he got affected by the chaos inherent in the ship which caused amnesia and several other side effects some known some not the main known one is that he now sees everything in opposite as in he think Kanatash in sane and that Nina is a mean person who harms people it also made him forget his name and he only remembered the it was a bread product. Another effect that is known is that he is now good so this has caused several problems with Nina and to a lesser extent Aerith this has caused Nina to be rather confused because she doesn't know why Bun-Bun is attacking her when she tries to help people.

Classification: Uber

OOC: If you guys don't like any of this let me know and I will take steps to fix it
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-22-07, 08:39 AM		Classification: Uber
OOC: :bored: Didn't we just have a small discussion about this? Look to Chalky for inspiration: he's annoying, but not über.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-22-07, 09:33 AM		The day after beating Tiamat the kids bound into the mess hall for breakfast, except for Lilly. He walks in a minute later, a jPod (like an iPod only a little crooked) in his hand and its earbuds in his semi-pointed ears. He's obviously trying to dance to something, but he's spoony.

Lilly: ……We're all crazy Flamenites, living in a Yawnish paradise.……

Nina: Yawnish?

Elina: A group of Flamers so boring that they make the Purists look like Zolan Gras.

Elina then yanks the earbuds out.

Lilly: Ow!

Elina: You are going to to relate to the rest of us like a respectable person.

Lilly: Yes ma'am.

13: Whu-pish!

Lilly: Ah, well, someone hand me the newspaper?

Sarah: This ship has a newspaper? :confused:

Lilly: Sure. What, you haven't been getting one?

Scias: What do you need it for?

Lilly: Well now that we've just fought off another giant threat to our—ah, here's one. *takes the edition that has mysteriously appeared right on the table* I have to plan for the next one, and that means—

Elina: You don't—I thought you'd learned like the rest of us that the draconic prophecy is a load of cr*p?

Lilly: Oh, I'm not in to that method any more. I'm not that dense.

Tirmek: Debatable.

Lilly: I've chosen to follow a much more reliable method of prediction.……

Elina: We should all be supportive of Lilly. He's actually working hard not to compensate for his Wisdom score.

Lilly: ……Newpaper horoscopes! :D

Elina: :bored:

Newpaper: Your horoscope for today…… (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q7rUYayyehY&mode=related&search=)

Lilly: :eek:

Nina: :eek:

Trimek and Elina: :nonono:

Scias: :evillaugh

Sarah: :confused: Who wrote these?

Lilly: Don't know. Doesn't list an author. It's just on the 13th page.

OOC: Vote on the name of the FF's newpaper! Submit your entries and then we'll vote, like we did with the bar.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-22-07, 11:42 AM		Classification: Uber
I agree with Silvercat, though everything else looks great.

My suggestions for the paper:

The Daily Bastard

The Eberron Declaration

The Spoony Inquisitor

The Barrier Avenue Log

Can you guess the name I spoofed for each? :D
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

03-22-07, 12:08 PM		Rat, count another voice against any more 'Uber' s.

Newspapers ideas:
The Rampant Rungate (No relation)

daily proaganda.

The Message Stone.

Forgotten Freadom Items ( The truth will make ye fret)
Charles Phipps

03-22-07, 05:32 PM		Kitten's People's Newspaper!
Paulon

03-22-07, 05:37 PM		KNN - Kanatash's Nightmare News?
Kaizer_Ryu

03-22-07, 09:39 PM		Somewhere in the slums of Regalport, a criminal syndicate is feeling the sting of being a heist target

Lilly: Where's the VAN?!?!?!

*multiple FIREBALL explosions*

Lilly: THE VAN WAS S'POSTA BE HERE!!!

*even more FIREBALL explosions*

Elina: Gimme a minute. Just give me one more minute. Dude, I need one more minute to hack into the mainframe.

Lilly: WHERE'S THE :censored: ING VAN?!

*further FIREBALL explosions*

Elina: I'm in Fairhaven. They re-routed me into Fairhaven! I need a minute!

Lilly: And why is he here, anyway?!

Sithis: :emp:

Sarah: Don't you remember?

Flashback

Sarah: Dude, trust me. He's cool.

Lilly: :bored:

Sarah: He's solid, and he's cool.

Lilly: ...but he's not cool, is he?

End flashback

Lilly: Oh, right.

Sithis: Let's kill these b*tches.

*BANG*

Lilly: *grabs his leg* AH :censored: ! (i.h.h.) It stings but it still makes me feel kinda cool. :D

*Van finally pulls up*

Tirmek: GET IN!

Lilly: *being carried by Elina* What the hell took you so long?!

Gaz: Sorry, my bad. I'll explain later.

*Unnecessary amount of FIREBALL explosions*

-----

Mareth: :D SQUEEEEE!!!! :D

Gaz: Gack...! Can't...breathe...!

Tirmek: While we were waiting, he saw this rare schema on the black market and just couldn't pass it up. Then he had to go and "negotiate" for a while. He said it's supposed to help build more durable machines. Give's them DR/Plot Device.

Sithis: Still doesn't beat this. At last! *holds up a bottle of bubbly liquid* A way to get blood/bile/grass stains/paint/etc out of silk!

Sarah: *tail wag* :cloud9: *chew* *munch*

Elina: Looks like the Everlasting Chew Toy is a hit.

Tirmek: It's a Ninja doll supposedly made to be indestructable.

Elina: Supposedly?

Tirmek: Indestructable? Versus her bite?

Elina: Right.

Tirmek: Either way I get paid. The Random Ninja guilds are paying handsomely to find ways to ease their losses. :D

Lilly: Even after Mickey's bill and the tithe, I still made enough to afford THIS! *holds up a monkey*

All: :uh-huh:

Lilly: I'm gonna give him armor and a sword and we're gonna battle! How cool is that?

They all stare at him.

Lilly: Come on. How pumped would you be coming home from school knowing that somewhere in your room there's a monkey you're gonna battle? Gaz? Sithis?

Gaz: *passed out from lack of oxygen*

Sithis: ...ok, that does sound kind of cool.

OOC: See here (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=USAR45Sd_1U) for the monkey inspiration.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-22-07, 10:21 PM		Lilly: Even after Mickey's bill and the tithe, I still made enough to afford THIS! *holds up a monkey*
……
OOC: See here (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=USAR45Sd_1U) for the monkey inspiration.
OOC: Dude, welcome to the "Making fun of the Lilly/FMA connection through the use of Youtube" Club. You've done awsomely. I never would have figured out how to work in the monkey.

Of course, you realize that now you have to make the monkey a character, since it can talk.

OOcat: More useful that Lilly.
rampant

03-22-07, 10:29 PM		OOcat: More useful that Lilly.

Tirmek - Yae Verily.

Lily - OK THAT'S IT! I'VE PUT UP WITH THIS FOR 5 YEARS! NO MORE MR. NICE PALADIN! ITS ON FUZZY!

Tirmek - Is that a challenge? :smirk:

Lily - Yes, yes it is.

Tirmek - Good then, High heels at dawn. *exits*

Lily - That's right fuzzy go get ready to ... Wait a minute!
ratslinky

03-22-07, 11:02 PM		OOC: Thanks for the suggestion I was thinking is he scum or uber and I couldn't really decide.
ratslinky

03-22-07, 11:15 PM		Gaz: Here Lilly I'll help you train

Lilly: Thanks Gaz but don't you want Tirmek to win

Gaz: *Bluff* No way I've been backing you all along

Lilly: Wow thanks Gaz your a great friend

Elina: *Telepathically* What are you planning?

Gaz: *Back* Nothing plans don't take into account things that might happen outside the plan

*Later*

Lilly: *Lilly is standing in front of Gaz with high heels and trying to balance three more pairs on his head* Ah you sure I have to do this as part of the training?

Gaz: Yes Tirmek has had years of practice with them I have to make you good enough to beat him in a day. Now I'm going out for five minutes when i come back I want you to still have those high heels balanced *Walks out the door and releases Lilly's fighting monkey as he goes. As he walks down the corridor defiantly human screams erupt from the room*
Charles Phipps

03-22-07, 11:29 PM		The Day of the Duel

Blossom: The trick is to use your feminity.

Lilly: Oh god, not the girdle again!

*Blossom tackles him*

Lilly: AHHHHH! NO!

Blossom: Okay, Ketler, now for the photo shoot!

Ketler: Righto!

Blossom: Let's start with Lillia in a bikini!

http://www.retrojunk.com/img/art-images/ss18.jpg

Lillia: GAH!

Blossom: Now the beach! Play on the Beach with Elina and Sarah!

http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/78xo9.jpg

Lillia: HELP! HELP!

Blossom: You're gorgeous! Now pose like a schoolgirl!

*waves her wand of cosplay transformation*

Lillia: How the hell did you get that!?

http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/animepaperwallpapersfatestaynightli.jpg

Blossom: Now run! Run with toast in your mouth!

http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/saber2.jpg

Blossom: Perfect! Perfect love!

Ketler: Final Fantasy poses!

http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/saber19.jpg

Blossom: Swing that sword!

http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/saber29ys8.jpg

*Lillia grumbles and goes over to play some video games*

http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/mediumAnimePaperwallpapers_Fate-Sta.jpg

Blossom: Good, now I don't have to do that MAXIM shoot.
rampant

03-23-07, 02:03 AM		Tirmek - Too bad the duel is a LIVE modeling contest. The outfits are behind the stage, we change and do a model walk for each one, first one to make the other's girlfriend drool wins.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-23-07, 02:18 AM		Lillia: HA! I win then.

Elina: :drool:

Tirmek: It hasn't started yet. And even then, you don't.

Sarah: :drool:

Lillia: She's just panting because it's hot out.

OOC: On a related note: curse you Charles! That beach picture will forever haunt me! I feel dirty...
rampant

03-23-07, 02:26 AM		Tirmek - ... first one to make the other's girlfriend drool wins.

Other's

other's

other's

Tirmek - Also the area around the stage is kept at a cool 20 degrees F.

Lily - That's cheating!

Tirmek - No that's having two brain cells to rub together.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-23-07, 02:56 AM		Other's

other's

other's
Doh!

But you have to cut me some slack. I've been scarred.

Oh, wait. Nevermind.

While I'm at it, here's the description of Lilly/Lillia's monkey.

Marigold

Awakened Dire Monkey (male)

Warblade ??

Marigold was initially just a normal monkey that Lilly bought out of a strange desire that most males get at one point or another to have a pet monkey. Over the protests of a conveniently placed know-it-all, Lilly brought Marigold home and gave him the girly name.

How he was awakened isn't fully understood, but it involves Momo attempting to generate superpowers through artificial means. While technically a failure, it did manage to somehow grant him sentience as well as skill as a Warblade. This suits Lilly just fine, and he has furnished the smaller primate with armor and a sword for the express purpose of battling him.

Lilly wants to teach him to drive, possibly having to do with his desire to have a battle monkey driving the van during a heist, but so far hasn't been allowed to.

Lilly: Marigold?

Marigold: *SCREECH*

Lilly: Where are you?

Marigold: I'm in the closet!

Lilly: :mymy: Holy crap, you just talked!

Marigold: I know, I taught myself to talk.

Lilly: That's...this is just freaking weird.

Marigold: I know. Let's fight!

Lilly: ...okay! :fight!:
Charles Phipps

03-23-07, 03:36 AM		OOC: On a related note: curse you Charles! That beach picture will forever haunt me! I feel dirty...

Because of Lilia or the underage Sarah and Elina?

;-)

IC:

Lilly: Very well, we'll have to make the OTHER's girlfriend drool.

Tirmek: That is acceptable to me.

Sarah: :drool:

Tirmek: Etu Sarah?

Lillia: I hid some Sarah snacks in my swimsuit!

Tirmek: GRRRRR

Lillia: I lack wisdom, not intelligence score.
ratslinky

03-23-07, 04:40 AM		Because of Lilia or the underage Sarah and Elina?

;-)

IC:

Lilly: Very well, we'll have to make the OTHER's girlfriend drool.

Tirmek: That is acceptable to me.

Sarah: :drool:

Tirmek: Etu Sarah?

Lillia: I hid some Sarah snacks in my swimsuit!

Tirmek: GRRRRR

Lillia: I lack wisdom, not intelligence score.

Gaz: *Gaz in a judges suit* I'm sorry but it is forbidden to put any sort of drug that might make the other's girlfriend drool. Also I believe that it is illegal to use any sort of magic that isn't part of your race. While normally you would be disqualified for this breaking of rules as you where not aware of them at the time I will let you off with a warning.
Charles Phipps

03-23-07, 06:42 AM		Gaz: *Gaz in a judges suit* I'm sorry but it is forbidden to put any sort of drug that might make the other's girlfriend drool. Also I believe that it is illegal to use any sort of magic that isn't part of your race. While normally you would be disqualified for this breaking of rules as you where not aware of them at the time I will let you off with a warning.

Captain Jarlot: Uhhh what's the fun if there's no cheating?

Gaz: Well it's only if they get caught?

Captain Jarlot: What's the fun in cheating if you have to hide it?

Gaz: Point.
ratslinky

03-23-07, 07:14 AM		Gaz: Okay we have revised rules you may cheat all you like

OORatslinky: You guys can decide if the next bit is canon

Gaz: Okay now the coin toss to see who goes first as far as we know Lilly plans to use Sarah treats in his walk and I have put a large amount of magically modified mercury to make Elina salivate although this may not work. Okay and now I really am going to coin toss instead of talking. Lilly heads or tails?

Lilly: Heads

Gaz: Sure thing Lilly Epsoe norstum encanten dol ectum. *The coin glow brightly for a moment before fading. Gaz then flips the coin it lands on tails*

Jarlot: Wait a minute *He picks up the coin and turns it over that side is tails as well*

Lilly: Hey thats cheati- oh

Gaz: *All at once* :D :P :evillaugh :devil: :bow:

Kithle: :emp: You have been trained well my young apprentice

Gaz: Why thank you master

Kithle: Come have a seat

Gaz: With pleasure *Walks over to the chair carefully checks it for any sort of bastardy type both magical and mundane finding nothing he sits down carefully and a bucket of sovereign glue falls down on him* Master that is an old trick *He pulls out a bottle universal solvent and starts rubbing it in the glue starts to turn a shade of pink* You magnificent bastard!
ratslinky

03-23-07, 07:26 AM		Scone-Scone: *Walks up to Tirmek and Lilly in the swim suits* Hey how come you guys have winter clothe on and the beach?
Charles Phipps

03-23-07, 07:45 AM		Tirmek: Okay, after Lilly fireballed me and I suck a Pit Fiend on him. After I cursed Elina's tongue to dry out before Lilly tossed a Ninja for Sarah to chew on?

Sarah: I thought it was a squeaky toy.

Lilly: Then I allowed myself to be possessed by a succubus before Tirmek worked on his bossoms with shapechange....

Elina: Why are there cowboys?

Lilly: I don't know where they came from.

Two Gun Kid: Yippie kay yai yay mother :censored:

Tirmek: We're now into the lightning round! *CASTS RAGE*

Lilly: Oh no! GROW....ANGER RISING....FEELING.....

*starts to Hulk out*

Tirmek: HA! Let's see Sarah salivate over that!

http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f299/Umbrax3/She-hulk.jpg

Tirmek: TRAVELLER DAMN IT!

She-Sulk: SHE-SULK SMASH!

Captain Jarlot: Gaz, we're seeing two incredible forces meeting.

Gaz: And what are those?

Captain Jarlot: Our tendency to sympathize with pure evil and how nature protects pretty but stupid people.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-23-07, 08:47 AM		Captain Jarlot: ……nature protects pretty but stupid people.
13: Nature my :censored: . :P
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-23-07, 08:49 AM		Blossom: Now the beach! Play on the Beach with Elina and Sarah!

http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/78xo9.jpg
Silver: *über-:drool: *
Kaizer_Ryu

03-23-07, 10:55 AM		Because of Lilia or the underage Sarah and Elina?

;-)
YES!

:tantrum: Must...purge...all...dirty...thoughts... !

*begins chugging bleach*
urial angel of death

03-23-07, 01:43 PM		Kerrith: *in fetal position* Must stay away from fashion show.

Sithis: Yah it would be really creepy to be attracted to female Lilly or Tirmek.

Kerrith: No it's their none elf bodies in such little clothing. It's disgusting! I'd have to rinse my eyes with bleach.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-23-07, 03:27 PM		OOC: What underage are we talking about? Because you do realize that human females tend to be sexually mature at around 14. "Underage" as under 18 (or 16 in some places) is a recent thing.
Crystalforged

03-23-07, 03:50 PM		OOC: What underage are we talking about? Because you do realize that human females tend to be sexually mature at around 14. "Underage" as under 18 (or 16 in some places) is a recent thing.
OOCrystalforged: Alright now, show yourself.

Silver: (poking her head out from behind the OOC) :D What?
Kaizer_Ryu

03-23-07, 03:59 PM		Kerrith: No it's their none elf bodies in such little clothing. It's disgusting! I'd have to rinse my eyes with bleach.
Silver: Something is horribly, horribly wrong with that comment...

Bunny: :bored: You mean that someone is only interested in their own species for once?

Silver: Exactly! :( I feel faint...

13: :devil:
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-23-07, 04:27 PM		…………
OOC: No, seriously
Silver: …horribly wrong…

Bunny: :bored: …

Silver: … :( I feel faint...

13: :devil:
OOcat: It's a wonder they put up with each other.
Crystalforged

03-23-07, 04:30 PM		OOC: No, seriously
OOC: I know you were serious, I was just joking that that is the kind of thing silver would say or would say herself. The kind of knowledge Silver would know and would attempt to distribute.
rampant

03-23-07, 06:26 PM		Lily - DAMMIT! How did he win?!

Tirmek - (wearing cutesy schoolgirl outfit) Simple I just turned into you Elina couldn't stop herself.

Lily - :twitch:

Tirmek - Don't try to out hot a shapeshifter punk.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-23-07, 06:44 PM		OOC: What underage are we talking about? Because you do realize that human females tend to be sexually mature at around 14. "Underage" as under 18 (or 16 in some places) is a recent thing.
OOC: I'm talking not yet 18 and jailbait. They don't technically even qualify for the 16 year old age of consent, much less the 18 years required here (not to mention adulthood for half-elves is 22, but they're a new breed of Outsider with only the base form of a half-elf, so that makes it even harder to determine). Therefore, I feel dirty thinking like that.

Not to mention that I watched them grow up, so that just makes it worse.

Mental age doesn't count for much legally unless it's lower than physical, so...

But I can still do this!

:drool:

Aerith: :mad: Do you want me to smite you?

:cloud9:
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-23-07, 06:48 PM		OOC: ………Mental age doesn't count for much legally unless it's lower than physical, so...
OOC: Well, what I'm saying is—

*WHAM!*

Silver: We now return you to your regularly scheduled love-fest.

13 and Bunny: :mymy:
Charles Phipps

03-23-07, 08:11 PM		Very well then, no more yummy Sarah pics!

Sarah looking pendantic: http://www.lolitron.org/pictures/fate02012.jpg

Sarah in a Windowsill: http://solo-of-clotho.up.seesaa.net/image/rin.JPG

More Sarah Schoolgirl shoot: http://pinx.lobida.com/CG/color/Ncg0169.jpg

Sarah and a mysterious white haired man: http://kurogane.animeblogger.net/image/fate/archer.jpg

Chibis!: http://kurogane.animeblogger.net/image/fate/chibi.jpg

Chibi Sarah and Lilia: http://kurogane.animeblogger.net/image/fate/rinsaber.jpg
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-23-07, 09:27 PM		OOC: Actually, they're too scary-looking to be Sarah. Given that and the fact that the last one is carrying Lilly suggests that they should be Elina.

Silver: Even I'm starting to get a little bored with female/female.

Lilly: For the record I don't enjoy this as much as cat-boy.
Paulon

03-23-07, 09:35 PM		Silver: Even I'm starting to get a little bored with female/female.

OOPaulon: Maybe you should invent some new genders so you've got more combination options?

*thinks of some of the ideas mentioned through the last 60 years of sci-fi novels* Or maybe that isn't such a good idea.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-23-07, 09:42 PM		OOPaulon: Maybe you should invent some new genders so you've got more combination options?
Silver: Already did that. And it's not as easy as it looks.
Paulon

03-23-07, 09:52 PM		Silver: Already did that. And it's not as easy as it looks.

OOPaulon: There's always that old joke to fall back on...
Q: How many sexes are there?
A: Three; the male sex, the female sex, and insects.
*grins, ducks, and runs*
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-23-07, 09:56 PM		A: Three; the male sex, the female sex, and insects.
Silver: Tried that system. Very creepy orgies.
Charles Phipps

03-23-07, 10:00 PM		Sarah: Uhhh...aren't me and Elina twins?

Elina: We wear different hairstyles.

Lilly: This is how I envision myself.

http://img128.imageshack.us/img128/4923/050510065008848qx.jpg

Elina: Oh PULEEEZE.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-23-07, 11:10 PM		OOKaizer: Nina and Deis are twins, but Sarah and Elina aren't. Sarah's about two months younger, has blue instead of pink hair, and is more feral.

Sarah: :tantrum: I'M NOT THE MUTT!!!!

OOKaizer: Sure your not, honey. *pats her head* *pulls back a bloody stump* But that's beside the point. Everyone seems to be ignoring a huge problem.

Sarah: *ears perk up as she holds the arm in her jaws* :confused:

OOKaizer: DOES NO ONE REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED LAST TIME SILVER WAS BORED?!?!?!

Tirmek: Now that you mention it, I distinctly remember hearing what sounded like a small bunny and fox fleeing in terror across dimensional barriers a little while ago.

Sithis: :uh-huh: I'm not even going to ask how you know what that sounds like.
rampant

03-23-07, 11:12 PM		Teiza - I fragging hate cleaning!

Dorvos - Then don't coat things in Chalky's special paint mix.

Dies - Or atleast don't get caught.

Scias - Urrrrp *a stream of bubbles shoots out of his mouth*

Corre - Nice bubble beam, now do water gun.
Paulon

03-23-07, 11:23 PM		OOKaizer:
OOKaizer: DOES NO ONE REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED LAST TIME SILVER WAS BORED?!?!?!

OOPaulon: Yes. As I recall the results were rather amusing. I suppose she'd do something different this time though. Maybe a rash of male pregnancies?
Charles Phipps

03-23-07, 11:57 PM		Time for the Wrap up Party

Lilly: When I left the Karrnath Royal Magicians? Yeah, I remember that.

Ivy: I was drunk at the time.

Elina: But you're underage....

Ivy: Well I have this video tape...

Lilly: NO!

Ivy: I also had it dubbed from Karrnathian!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wobek8L81xU
Charles Phipps

03-24-07, 01:26 AM		Karrnath

Roy Paladinmount: God dammit, where is that Lilly.

Rina Hawkbat: You think he's gone AWOL sir?

Roy Paladinmount: He hasn't attended a meeting of the Karrnath Wands in three years. It's quite possible.

Rina Hawkbat: Well with the death of King Kaius, and your elevation to Furher, that may mean any number of things.

Roy Paladinmount: Obviously, it means we need more sexy girls in uniform!

Rina Hawkbat: That's your response to everything.

Roy Paladinmount: It certainly brightens MY day. However, I'm more worried about the propaganda dangers of Lilly. He knows too much!

Rina Hawkbat: There were times when I wasn't sure State Wand Galen knew how to put on his pants.

Roy Paladinmount: Which only made him MORE clever. For example, do you know what THIS is!?

Rina Hawkbat: A DVD for Green day's newest video.

Roy Paladinmount: No, a protest song against our rule! STARRING LILLY!

*pops it in*

Roy Paladinmount: I should warn you it's got bad language and some inappropriate terms.

Rina Hawkbat: Sir, it's :censored: Green Day. What do you expect?

Roy Paladinmount: Just watch!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I3c46CXmaOg&mode=related&search=

Rina Hawkbat: Wow....why the hell did we ever hire Lilly?

Roy Paladinmount: Because he's indestructible and everything he touches is killed.
rampant

03-24-07, 02:12 AM		Tirmek - I'm still here.

Lily - Don't remind me.
Charles Phipps

03-24-07, 02:16 AM		Tirmek - I'm still here.

Lily - Don't remind me.

Tirmek: Well its just a reminder you'll never defeat me.

Maladren: Sir, actually, the Rakashasa Lords...what remains of them...rather wonder why you haven't been able to defeat him either.

Tirmek: I can't say that I haven't been trying can I?

Maladren: Not without looking like an even bigger boob.

*Tirmek raises candlestick over Lilly in the Study*
rampant

03-24-07, 02:25 AM		Tirmek - Wait a minute I hate them.

Lily - Phew he's torn between loathing and hatred, now I escape.

Tirmek - *bonk* Shut up Lily, i'm thinking.

Lily - Come on you just said it yourself you-

Tirmek - Hate them yes I know, I'm trying to decide which I hate more.

Lily - Why do you insist on insulting me.

Tirmek - Because you're spoony.
Charles Phipps

03-24-07, 02:41 AM		Lilly: And yet the irony is that I'm still the only thing you have to a peer.

Tirmek: :twitch:

Lilly: Uh oh. I think I broke him.

Tirmek: http://darthno.ytmnd.com/
Kaizer_Ryu

03-24-07, 02:52 AM		Sithis: Why do we always get left out?

Gaz: You WANT to be in the middle of that?

Kerrith: I'd at least like to be acknowledged once in a while.

-----

Lilly: Remind me again why we don't just fight to the death.

Tirmek: I'm trying to, but I can't quite remember either.

Elina & Sarah: :bigeyes:

Tirmek: Oh yeah...

Lilly: We fight too much and we don't get any.

*Wha-PISH*

Tirmek: I really wish Marish and Cuddles would soundproof their little "games".
rampant

03-24-07, 03:14 AM		Sithis - I have my own problems. NO! BAD BABY! NO XIATH! STOP CHEWING UP MY STAFF!
Charles Phipps

03-24-07, 07:58 AM		Story Editor's room

OOCharles: Okay, what exactly should be next

OOKaizer_Ryu: Uhhh, what are those guys doing here for?

Rose: Don't mind us.

Jarlot: As Captains, we've pretty much gained the power to influence the storyline as well.

Kanatash: I represent the insanity of the ship.

OOSilvercat: Well, we need some storylines and storylines fast.

Rose: Just hurry up, I have to get Lilly and Ivy to bed soon. Being a single parent is difficult.

OOSilvercat: Well, first up is the time issue. Frankly, the original characters that aren't immortal are noticibly aging.

Rose: I think, by this, you mean Ketler.

OOCharles: He's alright, he's covered his expenses by starring in another series. He's no longer a geeky teenage Otaku. He's now a creepy approaching middle aged one.

Rose: Where is he now?

***

Venture Laboratories

Ketler: Oh gods damnit! My kids have been blown up again. Let's get them to the clone tanks...

***

OOKaizer: Suddenly, that series makes so much more sense...

OOCharles: In any case, WONDERFUL idea for a story.

OOSilvercat: What is it?

OOCharles: FORGOTTEN FREEDOM'S CIVIL WAR

***

Forgotten Freedom Deck

Narrator: A tragedy tears apart families...

Elina: Oh no! A village has been blown up by ROGUE UBERS!

Sarah: So they get blown up all the time. Why is...

Elina: We must REGISTER and DRAFT all ubers into government service.

Sarah: Elina, we're crimminals!

Elina: Sarah, you are my sister but I MUST APPREHEND YOU!

Sarah: Curse you! I'll form a team of anti-Registration ubers!

Narrator: Breaks apart lovers....

Lilly: I can no longer stand your fascism Elina.

Elina: Flying monkeys! SEIZE HIM!

Narrator: Heroes are unmasked...

*Ketler removes his V mask*

Ketler: Yes...I am Spiderman.

Narrator: And only one side can win.

*Lilly is tackled by Paramedics, EMTS, and Police officers*

EMT: Stomp his ass! FOR THE END OF DEMOCRACY!

***

OOKaizer: No.

OOSilvercat: No.

OOCrystal_Forged: Will we get a Miss Marvel series?

OOCharles: No.

OOCrystal_Forged: No.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-24-07, 07:59 AM		Roy Paladinmount: God dammit, where is that Lilly.

Rina Hawkbat: You think he's gone AWOL sir?

Roy Paladinmount: He hasn't attended a meeting of the Karrnath Wands in three years. It's quite possible.
Jelousy: How in Khyber's name do we lose to these people?

Gourmand: They must have some special factor that is actually advantageous in regards to natural selection.

Jelousy: Shut up, fatboy.

Gourmand: :weep: *eats ice-cream compulsively*

Pervert: Jelousy, you are so………androgenous. :love:

Jelousy: This is why I f***in prefer to work with Rage!

Rage: Ten items or less MEANS TEN ITEMS OR LESS!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I3c46CXmaOg&mode=related&search=
OOC: I much prefer this version: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ypmxSnAFVR4&mode=related&search=
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-24-07, 08:58 AM		In Caralot's dimension……

Ketler is recuperating in his brother's lab when Merrix strides in.

Merrix: Quickly, Ketler, get my power-suit ready!

Ketler: You mean the one powered by a highly radioactive element?

Merrix: We'll worry about the affects it has on my lifespan later, for right now the heroes have escaped!

Ketler: I know. I was in the building when it blew up.

Merrix: I have no time for your incompetant excuses. I have to battle our goody-two-shoes brother Aaron.

Ketler:………………………………*sound of sanity snapping* :twitch:

Merrix: Ketler! Quit sitting around being a useless bum! There is a world to take over—(actually notices that Ketler is completely out of it)……………My entire family is made up of defective units! (goes and gets the suit on himself)
***********
Bruce and the other heroes break into the Villain Leagues HQ.

Bruce: Okay, people (using that term to include all possible states of being) this is it! Everyone have something to do during the big villain mono—

Trap: (gets sprung, caging the heroes in a field of force)

Bruce: We already did this part! Come on, d'Vol, this isn't a two-parter!

d'Vol (from somewhere over in one of the corners): It's not my fault………mostly.

Bruce looks over to find that all the villains are similarly in a force cage.

Bruce: Um……:confused:

Then Kitten steps out of the shadows, her hands glowing with the same kind of force as the cages. Her face is simply :twitch: .

Bruce: Kitten? What's going on? Are you doing this?

Kitten: Must……make the world……a better place……

Bruce: Um—

Kitten: THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE NOT DOING! YOU TRACK DOWN THESE CRAZY IDIOTS WHO COULDN'T GET A LIBRARY CARD IF THEIR LIFE DEPENDED ON IT GODS KNOWS HOW OFTEN AND YET YOU DON'T DO A THING ABOUT THE REAL SCUM THAT PREYS ON REGULAR PEOPLE EVERY DAY……………

Bruce waits patiently until Kitten is too horse and fatigued to talk.

Kitten: I thought you would interrupt me.

Bruce: I know a villain monologue when I hear it.

Kitten: Yes……………a villain……………………that's what she said……………

Erranids: Sorry, Gumshoe. I thought the worst that could happen was she'd go all Darth Vader on me.

Bruce: It's not your fault, Errandis. Don't worry I'll handle this. (looks very seriously at Kitten) So you want us to pick up all the…what? CEOs, serial killers, stuff like that?

Kitten: Couldn't you?

Bruce: Sure. Do it when we can.

Various heroes agree.

Kitten: What do you mean "when we can"?

Bruce: I could give you the whole "if we do things too much outside the law everyone will start doing it and you can kiss law and order goodbye" arguement. It works, though, because even a group of heroes couldn't deal with every little crime. We need the cops to deal with the easy stuff, and we take the worst cases.

Kitten: How do you know?

Bruce: That's what I did back when I was BatJarlot back in Sharn.

Kitten: So why'd you stop?

Bruce: I was one guy, with no powers and no fortune to get me cool gizmos. Every time I busted one crook it meant that there was someone else, possibly meaner and with more power, ready to take his place. In a city with heroes there's a natural selection for tougher bad guys. Eventually I had to pack up and leave things to Ultra-Man because I was facing opponents that were just too much for me to handle.

Kitten: Why didn't you stay and deal with street crime?

Bruce: I'm telling you, that's what I started out doing. But I was only one guy. There's a limit to what I can do myself. And as I told you, heroes pretty much have to tackle the worst villains because regular people can't handle them. And as you take them down they either adapt or give way to ones who can handle you better.

Kitten: Wait……let me work this out…………………:thinks:……………So what you're saying is that you concentrate on fighting big, flashy villains because no one else can, and that you'd rather fight a bunch of predictable idiots even if you have to act like idiots too because otherwise something worse'll come along?

Errandis: Bravo! :clap:

Bruce: Exactly.

Kitten: ………………………This trip was :censored: supposed to :censored: illusion me again! Instead it's teaching me that it's :censored: hopeless to wish for goodness in people and instead I should settle for predictability!

Bruce: Almost. That's almost the point.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-24-07, 03:21 PM		Kitten: *sigh* :bored: So what is the point?

Bruce: In the interest of wrapping up this seemingly never-ending plotline, the point is simple:

When you came back from your journey you were mad at the world for being evil and cruel. While you may have thought that meant you'd completely given up your idea that they world was intrisicly good, in fact what it really means is that you simply decided that the world wasn't being the way you think it is supposed to be. That's what makes you a villain: you want the world to work all on the terms of your own moral view rather than simply letting it work the way it works.

Before you ask something such as "then what is the point of heroes", let me answer: Heroes work within the framework of the world to accomplish change. While we think there is a way the world could be we don't try to force it. When we do we become villains.

In bringing you to this world Caralot wanted to show you a place where "good" and "evil" are such simple and cliché concepts that one can see their underlying structure. I don't think you've been paying enough attention to see that. It was hoped that you'd realize that "good" and "evil" are just agreed upon packages of actions that people are allowed to do and not allowed to do, respectively. The nature of the people aboard the Forgotten Freedom is agreeing that certain actions of the majority's "evil" category are acceptable, even if those people still think of them as "evil". Even the “good” people accept certain things about the “evil” people aboard.

Kitten: *long pause* You done?

Bruce: Yup.

Kitten: You know what? I’m not sure I get all that, but I am getting tired of going on and on trying to figure out how to make everything the way I want it. It’s exhausting. You make a good point, so I’m just going to let people who want to be eternal f***tards be enternal f***tards.

Bruce: Goody. Now, one last thing: let us out? You know, the whole villain vs. hero showdown thing.

Kitten: What? Oh, yeah, sure. *drops the force cages*

*big heroes and villains facing each other splash page*

Bruce and Errandis set up beach chairs a safe distance from the battle.

Kitten: Okay, now what are you two doing? Aren’t you going to fight?

Bruce: Nah. *brings out a cooler and picks out a beer*

Erranids: We’re too old for that sort of thing. *leans back in the beach chair*

Meanwhile the villains and heroes are giving monologues and speeches and trading pre-battle banter.

Bruce: It’s not really our style, either.

Errandis: We’re more “facilitators”.

Kitten: Meaning you keep these two groups of transparent fools afloat so that no one can move into their places and start the arms race.

Bruce and Errandis: A’yup.
Charles Phipps

03-24-07, 03:35 PM		Lilly: Geebus, Kitten goes through such Hell. I wonder why she never went to me for advice on what's good and evil.

Rose: The Paladin with the lowest wisdom in the world?

Lilly: Intelligence is knowledge. I have loads of that.

Rose: And what, praytell, is good and evil.

Lilly: It's simple. People assume Good and Evil are nouns. They're verbs instead.

Rose: No such thing as a good person then?

Lilly: Every day is a chance for a person who does good things to do evil and an evil person to make up for it. That's what makes life interesting.

Rose: So what does Detect Evil actually sense?

Lilly: My need to KICK THEIR ASS.

Rose: ....
Kaizer_Ryu

03-24-07, 05:22 PM		Tirmek: That's quite a lot like my Detect Spooniness. It determines my need to mock someone mercilessly.
Charles Phipps

03-24-07, 05:24 PM		Lilly: At least I'm not a member of an evil but race that's against them all while my introspection sets me apart.

Tirmek: What do you mean....

Lilly: You might as well break out twin scimitars.
rampant

03-24-07, 06:03 PM		Tirmek - Look its not the evil I object to. Its the inbreeding, and the spoonyness that results.
Charles Phipps

03-24-07, 06:09 PM		Lilly: I point out that my mother was Khyber and my father was a half elf. That pretty much is as far from inbred as possible.

Rose: Of course, there is some questions about my human side being related to royalty.

King Steve: Do you like my shoes made out of babies?
rampant

03-24-07, 06:41 PM		Tirmek - That just proved my point, your spoonyness.
Charles Phipps

03-24-07, 06:49 PM		Tirmek - That just proved my point, your spoonyness.

King Steve: TIRMEK!

Tirmek: Eh?

King Steve: MY NEPHEW!

Lilly: Oh no...

King Steve: AND MY OTHER NEPHEW!

Lilly: :twitch:
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-24-07, 06:51 PM		Sithis - I have my own problems. NO! BAD BABY! NO XIATH! STOP CHEWING UP MY STAFF!

The Staff Begins to spark.

Sithis: Oh cra-

an explosion of energy signals the release of the storm elementals imprisoned within. and with a thunderclap they vanish... leaving a large cloud of smoke.
the smoke clears and standing within it is Sithis, who has substained some rather moderate wounds as well as a large splinter protruding from his chest... several inches shy of his heart.

and then there's Xiath. whose completely unharmed by the explosion.

Sithis: *glaring at the baby* I hate you.

Xiath: :bigeyes:

Sithis: must... resist... *Will save fail* I cant stay mad at you, you're just too cute.
rampant

03-24-07, 07:02 PM		13 - Don't you just love children:D
Charles Phipps

03-24-07, 07:08 PM		Non-canonical out of respect to the existing storyline

Kitten: Oh isn't there any TRUE heroes?

Commander Cosmic: Yes, Kitten *I* am a True Hero.

Kitten: Captain Jarlot?

Commander Cosmic: Indeed, I am or as I'm known in this world. THE MOST POWERFUL MAN IN THE UNIVERSE.

Kitten: But he's shown me that society makes up good and evil! That such concepts cannot be contained by anything but pointless philosophy! That labelling one thing good and another thing evil is merely an exercise in semantics!

Commander Cosmic: I dismiss that with a wave of my hand. Pishaw.

*waves his hand dismissively*

Kitten: You can't do that! Can you?

Commander Cosmic: You see Kitten, I could explain that there's a Jungian archetypical need to explain in mythological terms the fundamental biological drives that create a thriving community ideal that is good while those who act beyond this are evil. However, no, I'm not going to do that.

Kitten: You're not?

Commander Cosmic: No, instead I'm going to tell you that its all about THE IMAGE.

Kitten: Huh?

Commander Cosmic: This is what being a superhero is all about! ALCHEMIST BOY!

Lilly: YO!

Commander Cosmic: Tell why you're a superhero, Alchemist Boy!

*Lilly pulls out a guitar and starts playing*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0w7cMEvPJw8&mode=related&search=

Commander Cosmic: Does that explain things?

Kitten: :twitch:

Commander Cosmic: Now for the rest of the song!

*pulls out rocking guitars*

http://www.marvel.com/publishing/stories/nextwave/NextWaveFinal.mp3
Kaizer_Ryu

03-24-07, 07:19 PM		Terra: I've neer been this glad that my father was a demon-possessed maniac ressurrected by pure eldrich energy.

Rose: :weep: Shut up! My dad was cool!

Terra: Not according to our mother. How'd she put it, again? "I was so distraught after your father's first death that I married a piece of silverware."

Rose: :allalone:

King Steve: How are the wedding plans coming?

Terra: Uh, Steve? You know Nelia was Tiamat, right?

King Steve: Slowly, I take it.

Terra: And that Tiamat is dead, right?

King Steve: Well, we can always postpone if things aren't going as smoothly as planned.

Terra: THERE'S NOT GOING TO BE A WEDDING!

King Steve: Oh, dear. Nelia will be heartbroken.

Terra: *groan*
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-24-07, 07:21 PM		Tara yawns, and sits down at the kitchen table ( yes, they have a kitchen) and begins going through the mail.

Tara: Bills, Bills, Captains orders, Bills, Bills, Vols witnesses leaflet. ah, here we go. a letter.

she opens it. and begins to read.

Tara: - *hands shaking*

Naz'roth walks in, deep bags under his eyes from the long night spent reassembling the Dark Library*. he passes Tara, who hasnt moved and then halts. turning he picks up the letter and reads it as well.

Naz'roth:- *fear etched on his face*

Sithis now wanders in, limping slightly since he still hasnt fully recovered from the staff "Incident". noticing the other two he stops and turns to the rather bedragled looking Feal-Thas.

Sithis: are we suffering from a time anomaly again?

Feal-Thas: I hope not. it took us ages to fix that. they're probably suffering from shock.

Sithis: From that letter? it couldnt be that bad.

he tears it from Naz'roths fingers. and reads.

Sithis: ... this is bad. really bad.

Feal-Thas: What! Let me see!

Takes the letter from him and reads:

" Dear Ancestors.

you'll be happy to know im alive and in good health. well.. actually i havnt been alive for several millenia.. but thats not the point.

If you're wondering while im taking time away from my busy schedual plotting eventual world domination and revenge at the Undying court then it is to inform you that i will be visiting to see the new addition to out bloodline.
" Xiath".

Wishing you all the best,
Your loving " Granny"
Erandis d'Vol.

Ps. Tara, when are you ever going to get around to marrying that good for nothing lay about Naz'roth? surely he isnt that afraid of commitment.

pps. you could at least write or visit your ageing undead great ancestor once in a while? "


* a pun, its actually pretty well lit.
Charles Phipps

03-24-07, 07:23 PM		King Steve: Oh very well, I just need a new daughter to replace Nelia.

Rose: Uhhh, we already determined Sarah and I are not going to marry because we're related.

King Steve: Tut tut, I need someone to marry your bloodline or the throne won't remain sufficiently Spoony.

Rose: HEY!

King Steve: I know, you're a pretty girl! You're my new daughter.

Lilly: I'm a man.

Tirmek: HA H...

King Steve: I adopt you then!

Tirmek Gah!

King Steve: As King, can I marry people?

Rose: Well, tech...

*Brelish Knights start beating Rose with bats*

Rose: YES!

King Steve: Then Tirmek and Lilly are married!
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-24-07, 07:26 PM		King Steve: Then Tirmek and Lilly are married!

Sithis: and i thought my family was messed up.
Charles Phipps

03-24-07, 07:29 PM		Motoko: in any case, Lady Terra, we have an appointment at five.

Terra: Where did you find this girl anyway?

Rose: Oh she's a Blackguard from Sarlona.

Terra: :blink: What?

Rose: Basically, she was in one of the slave camps for women whose family resisted the Quori's armies enforced paradise. She decided to resist by pledging herself to evil.

Terra: Rose, can I talk to you?

Rose: No, it's one of the benefits of being Neutral that I can overlook things like this for her excellent qualifications.
rampant

03-24-07, 07:29 PM		Tirmek - :twitch:

Lily - :twitch:

Tirmek - I'll reverse the flow of time, you stab him in the face until it stops being funny.

Lily - Way ahead of you.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-24-07, 07:40 PM		OOC: Kale, that was hilarious! You get a :banghead: award for character torture involving a crotchety old relative.

IC:

Sarah: :weep: *chewing on a therapy Ninja*

Elina: Sarah, you know it's not gonna work.

Sarah: *finishes that Ninja and grabs another* :weep: *chew*

Elina: That's your tenth one in an hour. I'm cutting you off.
Crystalforged

03-24-07, 08:52 PM		Kanatash: :bigeyes: Does this mean mommy's little girl is coming home soon? I've missed her ever so much.

OOCrystalforged: :rofl: Ok, wow. Just wow. That is one of the most pathetic things I have ever seen. You are probably the most whipped person I have ever seen.

Kanatash: :rant: Watch it boy. You may have brought me into this world but I swear I will do my best to see to that I take you out of it.

OOCrystalforged: :rolleyes: Yeesh, touche'. Fine, fine. I'm looking forward to Kitten getting back too. :smirk: I've got quite a few ideas involving her on the back burner.

Kanatash: ...you really are going to make me kill you aren't you? You're going to give me no choice but to lay into you with the DM Breaker until our mind is a burned out husk, aren't you?

OOCrystalforged: :D Probably.
cypher_zero

03-24-07, 11:06 PM		OOC: Wait... It's not a burned out husk alreadY?
.
Crystalforged

03-24-07, 11:53 PM		OOC: Nah, but I think I may have brought part of a Great Old One back with me over spring break when I went out on the ocean to make blood sacrifices to the Elder Gods. Sometimes he decides to wiggle around in there. Its an very interesting feeling, kinda tickles actually. Usually thats about the same time I come here to post.

...or I go out I start laying out the plans to present my roomate to the Deranged Lords and polishing my sacrificial dagger...
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-25-07, 08:33 AM		Kanatash: :bigeyes: Does this mean mommy's little girl is coming home soon?……
OOC: I'm working on it. One more event, a few more jokes. I just need a few more days.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-25-07, 03:40 PM		I just need a few more days.
OOC: Just days? ;)

IC:

Teiza: Oi, psychoficer!

Momo: *hunched over her worktable* Not now! I'm making... *lazers and electricity * ...TOAST! *holds up toast*

Teiza: Um...'kay.

-----

Teiza comes across Deis and Vladamere standing next to a table with something...squid-like on it.

Teiza: Hey-

Vladamere: Ok, that should do it. Throw the switch.

Deis: Not until you do the voice. :D

Vladamere: *sigh* *DRAMATIC POSE* Throw ze svitch!

Deis: *glee* *pulls the switch*

Electricity courses through the form on the table, but it does not come alive.

Deis: DAMMIT!

Vladamere: Oh, man. Dad's gonna be so disappointed. But at least we can show him we tri- HEY!

Teiza: *BELCH* Mmm. Not bad for Calamari. *walks away*

Deis: :weep: Our experiment...

Vladamere: *DRAMATIC POSE* One day soon, I shall have my revenge! REVEEEEEENNNNNNGGGGGEEEEEE!!!!!!

Deis: All right! You finally got the "evil villain declaration of revenge" tone down!

Vladamere: Wow. I guess it's a mood thing.

-----

Teiza: Hey, Nina. Where are all the-

Nina: :weep:

Teiza: What's wrong?

Nina: :weep:

Teiza: *looks in the same direction Nina is* Hey, isn't that the Karrnathi space station, Yir?

Butters: Oh my dad! They killed Kenny!

Myrr: *points at the station* You Bastards!

-----

Sithis: Nooooo! Not my new cloak!

Xiath: *gulp* Gooo. :D

Teiza: Ok, I'm not going anywhere near that.

-----

After much searching, Teiza finally comes across her goal.

Sarah: Grrrr. :drool: *yank*

Random Ninja: :weep: It hurts...

Scias: :drool: Grrr! *tug*

Teiza: Yes! *CHOMP* *pull* Grrr...

Drovos: And there goes all our hard work.

Elina: *sigh* And here I thought we'd gotten all the Random Ninja's out of here.

Dorvos: I'm pretty sure we've got a Manifest Zone to the Plane of Ninjas around here somewhere.
rampant

03-25-07, 03:55 PM		After one very painful (for king steve) anullment.

Tirmek - Memory wipes for everyone!
---------------------------------

Lily - Ok I feel loads better, but I can't help feeling someone or something has planted all sorts of psyche damaging images in my brain ready to reap untold havoc upon my poor soul should the whim strike.

Tirmek - thats just silly.
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-25-07, 05:18 PM		Sithis: *glaring at Xiath* i was never this annoying as a child.

- Flash back-

Mara ( Sithis's older brother) sits at his desk finishing his homework. he turns as he hears a noise, and we see very young sithis crawl into the room.

Mara: Oh hey Sithis, what are you doing here?

Sithis: Goo.

a spark of flame jumps form Sithis's hands and lands on Mara's homework.
which, since it contains magical formulea quickly catchest fire. within seconds the whole lot of paper (about two hundred pages) has been reduced to ash.

Mara: NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Charles Phipps

03-25-07, 06:02 PM		After one very painful (for king steve) anullment.

Tirmek - Memory wipes for everyone!
---------------------------------

Lily - Ok I feel loads better, but I can't help feeling someone or something has planted all sorts of psyche damaging images in my brain ready to reap untold havoc upon my poor soul should the whim strike.

Tirmek - thats just silly.

Tirmek: *presses horrible mind numbing fear*

Lilly: La la la la la.

Tirmek: *presses it again*

Lilly: Hey, look a penny!

Tirmek: GRRRR!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-25-07, 07:04 PM		Tirmek: *presses horrible mind numbing fear*
………
Tirmek: *presses it again*
………
Tirmek: GRRRR!
13: *sigh* You don't have any conception of true terror, do you?

Tirmek: What are you talking about? It's just busted or something. I'm pretty sure I got past his paladinic immunity.

13: So what exactly are you using? Imposed or induced?

Tirmek: Induced. I'm not that inexperienced at this.

13: Inducing exactly which part of memory?

Trimek: Horrible encounters.

13: What kind of horror? Ugly or depressing?

Trimek: Embarassment.

13: Very good my little fuzzy friend. But are you inducing universally-found embarassment?

Tirmek: Um…yeah.

13: Well why don't we take a look at Lilly's brain and see what happens when you do:………

13 freezes Lilly, then flips open his skull.

13: Hop in.

Tirmek does as directed. He finds himself on an empty sound stage. 13 lands next to him. He takes the controls from Tirmek and presses the button for fear again.

The stage becomes set like some sort of military training yard. There are two Karrnathi Royal Magicians standing around.

Roy Paladinmount: *checks his watch* Galan is late.

Rina Hawkbat: I'm sure he'll be here, sir.

Roy: He'd better be, after all the strings I pulled to get someone that young accepted for testing.

Lilly's voice: Yo!

Roy: Finally (turning around)—:mymy:

Rina: Sir? (turns around) :blush:

Roy: ……………*ahem* Candidate Galan, why are you wearing……um……………

Lilly: What? You told me to dress light.

Roy: Yes, but……you're in your underwear.

Tirmek: Standard nightmare.

13: Watch.

Lilly: Well I was going to come naked……………

13 ends the scene.

Tirmek: Okay, well, I guess Lilly isn't afraid of these sorts of dreams.

13: Probably because this is a memory.
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-25-07, 07:49 PM		OOC: due to having my drama exam on wednesday i'll most likely be busy with various practises an rehersals, so i might not be able to post as frequently as i would like.

IC:
Tara stood there her hands shaking. Granny erandis was coming over. to see Xiath. how granny erandis had found out about the child was anyones guess. and if she was coming to see the child then it obvously must be somthing special. Tara would have to keep an eye on the aged lich. what ever her motives where, they couldnt be good.

***
Feal-thas walks towards Ketty worry etched on his face. she turns

Ketty: whats wrong i've never seen you this worried before, even when we where going to battle against the dragons.

Feal-Thas: ... err... this is going to sound daft but .. the reason im so nervous is that .. my well we call her "Granny" because it would take to long to say her real title in terms of relation was but well the things is... my "Granny" Erandis is coming over to see Xiath.

Ketty: wait.. Erandis, you mean Erandis d'Vol right?

Feal-Thas: yes. i mean Erandis d'Vol, anchient Lich and leader of the cult known as the Blood of Vol and their diciples.

( I'll leave Kettys reaction to you Rampant)
rampant

03-25-07, 08:03 PM		Ketty - Make sure she doesn't decay on my carpeting or you die with her.
fiendish_platypus

03-25-07, 08:42 PM		OOC: Holy Jeeze, sory I ahven't posted in forever, I've been really busy, and I just had pink eye.
Charles Phipps

03-25-07, 08:58 PM		Welcome back
rampant

03-26-07, 12:37 AM		Feal-Thas - Shouldn't you be worried more about Xiath than your carpets?

Ketty - If she for one moment becomes even a ghost of a threat to my daughter, I'LL BEAT HER TO DEATH WITH HER OWN PHYLACARTHY.

Tirmek - And I'll hold her down.

Feal-Thas - What have I gotten myself into.

Tirmek - Welcome to the family, I'm not calling you dad.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-26-07, 08:32 AM		Okay, here's the candidates for the newspaper so far:
The Daily Bastard

The Eberron Declaration

The Spoony Inquisitor

The Barrier Avenue Log

The Rampant Rungate

daily proaganda.

The Message Stone.

Forgotten Freadom Items ( The truth will make ye fret)

Kitten's People's Newspaper!

KNN - Kanatash's Nightmare News [diqualified because it sounds too much like a TV or radio program]

Similar to last time, you may make two votes, in order of your preference.
Mine are:
1. The Daily Bastard.
2.………………That's actually the only one I like enough.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-26-07, 08:43 AM		Tirmek - Welcome to the family, I'm not calling you dad.
13: Looks like someone could use a "family bonding" episode. :angel:

Tirmek: Do it and I will find a way to kill you.

13: Then you won't be able to have any fun with Lilly.

Tirmek: What……:confused:……but……I……………ARGH! :banghead:

13: :cool:

Tirmek: Wait……:lightbulb ……:devil: if i kill you then Lilly will stop being annoying. Everything will stop being annoying.

13: :cool: Have you carefully considered all the implications of that?

Tirmek: :confused:

13: If everything stops being annoying you will bond with your new dad. BECAUSE YOU WON'T HATE HIM!

Tirmek: :eek:…………………………:surrender You had this planned from the start, didn't you?

13: :D This is why I'm the god of bastards.
urial angel of death

03-26-07, 10:42 AM		OOC: Holy Jeeze, sory I ahven't posted in forever, I've been really busy, and I just had pink eye.

OOC: Would you like some topical cream. :D
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-26-07, 12:02 PM		OOC: Holy Jeeze, sory I ahven't posted in forever, I've been really busy, and I just had pink eye.

Welcome Back.

i put my vote in for:

The Daily Propaganda.

Its just got that certain feel that seems to fit in with the terror of the Forgotten Freedom.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-26-07, 12:57 PM		Mine are:
1. The Daily Bastard.
2.………………That's actually the only one I like enough. :D :bow:
It may just be coincidence, but that's the only one I didn't have to think on. I quote Ray from Ghostbusters: "It just...popped in there."
Crystalforged

03-26-07, 03:42 PM		Daily Bastard sounds pretty good but I was wondering who's actually going to be producing this paper? I was just thinking the name of the paper should either reflect the person producing it or the ship in general. Of course if its 13 or Kithle the name is perfect. :D
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-26-07, 03:56 PM		Of course if its 13 or Kithle the name is perfect. :D
OOC: That's why I voted for it.
rampant

03-26-07, 04:29 PM		Kithle - I call editor!

13 - aw nerts
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

03-26-07, 06:23 PM		OOC: I know it was one of my sugestions, but I vote for 'The Daily Propaganda' Daily Bastard is good, but I like some subtley with my menace.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-26-07, 08:03 PM		OOC: Here's my votes.

1. The Daily Bastard (Subtlety's all well and good, but who are we kidding? It's the news, they're all bastards, anyway :D )
2. Daily Propaganda (Still doesn't mean I don't like it)

IC:

Elina: How long have you lived here?

Lilly: About as long as you have.

Elina: And how is it that you still manage to get lost?

Lilly: I'm not lost! I'm just...not sure where I am.

Elina: :nonono: *sigh* Would you like me to help?

Lilly: Never fear, my love! My innate sense of direction shall get us out of this. And it's telling me to go in here.

Elina: *sigh*

Lilly opens the door and finds himself in a lush garden.

Lilly: Oh, this must be your Mom's greenhouse.

Female Computerized Voice: Lawn Ninja Defense System: Activated.

Lilly: Uh-oh.

About a dozen Lawn Gnomes dressed as Ninja's leap out dual-wielding Katanas.

Lilly: :eek:

Elina: Momo made them and they should be Scias-proof, if not Sarah-proof. I suggest you run.

Lawn Ninjas: BANZAI!!!!!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-26-07, 08:20 PM		About a dozen Lawn Gnomes dressed as Ninja's leap out dual-wielding Katanas.
OOC: I think you just created a new form of weird. Have an :uh-huh: .
Kaizer_Ryu

03-26-07, 08:29 PM		OOC: I think you just created a new form of weird. Have an :uh-huh: .Hooray!

Thanks, but I can't take full credit. I got the idea from Ratchet & Clank: Going Commando/Up Your Arsenal. It was a failed invention from the company MegaCorp. There were more, and I plan on using them at some point. I've been trying to fit the Lawn Ninja in for months. :D
ratslinky

03-26-07, 09:16 PM		OOC: My vote is

1. The Daily Bastard

2. The Spoony Inquisitor

The Daily Bastard because its funny and The Spoony Inquisitor because it is completely family run meaning Lilly and Rose will hopefully be spending so much time making the news paper that they won't have time to be spoony at people.

Now on a different note we need a name for our first Global Image Projector ie. TV the way it is made is to use custom Image Projectors form Magic of Eberron and custom scrying balls the can only scry the area and are TV shape and can be used by anyone.

Currently the only channels name has yet to be decided and seeing as it is patented for the next ten google years it will probably stay the way.

Gaz: Okay people Mareth and I have come up with a new news and entertainment system we have patented it for the next ten google years by which time the world will have been destroyed. Now in the near future it has been decided that there will be only one channel and you guys get to vote on it. And if any of you are thinking of using any sort of time magic to get around that give it up because I have already used time magic to patent it before the world was created.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-26-07, 09:54 PM		The name Spoony Inquisitor was actually intended to infer that it would primarily be about the Spoony crew (i.e. to torment them), not made by them.

And I'm not being mean with this, ratslinky, just imitating a real-world response to such things. ;)

IC:

Kithle: You know the problem with monopolies and patents?

Gaz: Oh hell.

Kithle: Technology tends to benefit those outside the loop. ThySpace, TheeTube, Oogle Video, and the Kithleweb in general are all free except for a small monthly fee and exempt from restrictions typically imposed by things controlled by single entites.

Gaz: I'd have thought you'd be against such things.

Kithle: Pop-ups, seizure-inducing ads, redirecting, viruses, phishing, spam, and mind-numbing instant gratification make things so much more interesting. :devil:

Gaz: (i.h.h.) Must remember not to step on the Magnificent Bastard's turf. Perhaps I can market this to the peasentry and charge corporations to air their ads.
Charles Phipps

03-26-07, 10:17 PM		Rose: Sigh.

Lilly: Dad, why do they pick on us?

Rose: Well, Spooniness is actually a metaphor for hating us because we're Half-Elves.

Lilly: What? Those racist bastarves! I'll kill them!

*Lilly gets a chainsaw and heads out the door*

Rose: Or was it being a major dork? I forget which.
Charles Phipps

03-26-07, 10:20 PM		Roy Paladinmount: Hello, Mister Rose?

Rose: Yes?

Roy Paladinmount: We're here to arrest your son.

Rose: Hold on, whose the blonde?

Roy Paladinmount: Oh, that's Rita Hawkbat.

Rose: Mmmmm, I like them military style.

Roy Paladinmount: Ahem, sir, your son is charged with treason.

Rose: Will she be available for nightcaps later?

Rita Hawkbat: Can I take my gun?

Rose: Sure.

Rita Hawkbat: Okay.

Roy Paladinmount: He may get the death penalty...

Rose: Uh huh. He's in the other room....sooooo...Rita...
rampant

03-26-07, 10:25 PM		Tirmek - Can I be the prosecuting attorney?
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-26-07, 10:28 PM		OOC: I need to put this plot temporarily on hold due to me needing to write a certain scene before it goes into effect. Go about your normal business.

UPDATE: Okay, this thing's going ahead, but you need to give us time to set up the first stuff before you can jump in. There are some rules for this one:
1. No using übers or anything else that would show the FF having clear superiority. The Karrnathies have to have a reasonable chance of winning.
2. Lilly, Roy, and Rina have to be alive and fully functional for the ending. Anyone and anything else is fair game.
ratslinky

03-26-07, 10:52 PM		Gaz: Ah yes ThySpace and friends and thought of that every time someone even glimpses my scry balls they have an overwhelming urge to go crash all of these sites and then come back to watch more. And my programs are completely free I already have several large corporations on board and they will be paying for ads threw the show at regular intervals and I also have product placement for example check out our top show "Big Sister" its a show where we get a bunch of sexy and gullible teenagers to spend ten weeks in a house and they are filmed for the whole time.
rampant

03-27-07, 01:51 AM		Satnak - Why would anyone watch that crap?
---------------------------------------------------

Lily - Ok now see here, I know you hate me, but you have to have i dunno legal training or something.

Tirmek - I have to pass the Karnnathi bar exam, its a paper test.

Lily - Oh fug!...Wait you have to be appointed!

Roy - He's got the job.

Tirmek - :evillaugh:

Lily - I'm boned.

Rose - Royally
Kaizer_Ryu

03-27-07, 02:15 AM		OOC: Silvercat and Charles, I have but one humble request. You may already be planning it, but here you go:

There MUST be a Hughes and Armstrong analogue in this plot. They are, hands down, my two favorite characters in the whole series (either). :D

:weep: HUUUUUUUGGGGGHHEEEEESSSSSS!!!!!! :weep:
Charles Phipps

03-27-07, 03:28 AM		OOC: Your wish is my command.

IC:

Roy Paladinmount: In any case, Judge Tirmek, you only now have to be confirmed by our presiding Chief Justice to serve as the prosecuting attorney.

Tirmek: Excellent.

Roy Paladinmount: Gods help you.

Tirmek: Hmmmm?

Chief Justice Humes: Hello there!

Tirmek: Hello, I'm here to be confirmed...

Chief Justice Humes: Isn't my daughter ADORABLE?

*pulls out pictures*

Tirmek: Well, yes....she lacks the tentacles of most children on this...

Chief Justice Humes: Here's another.

Tirmek: errr is this necessary?

Chief Justice Humes: It could all be relevant information in the future! Character is very important. Now come look over here at these...

*Tirmek stared at the piles of baby pictures behind him*

Tirmek: Dear Gods! Is your daughter going to die from flashbulb exposure!?

Chief Justice Humes: Here's her sitting in the Grand Druid's lap for Dol Dornmas! She asked for a unicorn! Lilly gave her his!

Buttercup: Bastar*.

Chief Justice Humes: But we had to send it back.

Roy Paladinmount: Confirmation should only take five or six days.

Tirmek: GAH!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-27-07, 08:58 AM		OOC: I'll leave the Alchemist plotline to Charles for now. Let's end Kitten's stay!
IC:
*big hero/villain battle splash page*

Dramatic Interrupting Villain Laugh sounding like a clown on crack: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !

Bruce: What?

Errandis: We're past "Villain Laugh" moments.

Kitten: It came from up…(points to a crosswalk high above)

Everyone looks up.

Ketler stands on the catwalk, but now his face is bleached and lined with gold scrollwork, his clothes like something out of a Shakespeare play with puffy sleeves, ruffles on in the cuffs and collar, and a cape.

Merrix: Ketler! What the Khyber are you doing?!

Kelter: Shut up, brother! I'm through taking orders from you, OR ANYONE ELSE! For all my life YOU AND AARON GOT ALL THE ATTENTION! Everyone thought I was just a dumb little kid who couldn't have any Cannith talent and therefore was only good as a doorstop or a paperweight OR SOME OTHER MENIAL TASK NOT BEFITTING MY GENIUS! Oh, I tried to prove them wrong, built incredible devices, BUT THEY WERE SO SET IN THEIR WAYS THEY WOULDN'T HAVE ACCEPTED THE PAPERCLIP!

Aaron: Ketler, you mainly invented ways to see women without their clothes on.

Ketler: BUT THEY WORKED FLAWSLESSLY!

Merrix: Except for when they found out and sued us.

Ketler: YOU SEE?! DON'T YOU ALL SEE?! THEY CAN'T APPRECIATE MY GENIUS!

Errandis: Oh dear, he's devolved to both caps and size 4.

Merrix: Ketler, shut up and let the pros get back to their important business.

Kelter (with spittle flying): NO! I AM THROUGH SITTING IN YOUR SHADOWS! I WILL NOW BE THE ONE TO DO WHAT YOU HAVE NEVER BEEN ABLE TO DO:TAKE OVER THE WORLD!

Merrix: Really? And how do you plan to do that?

Kelter: By destabalizing the thread that holds the core of this world in check. *flourishes the standard "box with big red button"* BEHOLD! All that is needed to rule the world!

Bruce: You need to explain you big villain plan.

Ketler: STOP! CALLING! ME! STUPID! *ahem* In working so ignobly for my brother I have made subtle alterations to the planning for placement of Pholly Corp. buildings to locate them along key world fault lines. With one press of this button I will disrupt those lines, and after the ensuing destruction is unleashed upon the world I shall rule over it's remains.

Aaron: You're bluffing.

Kelter: NO, I'LL DO IT! OR MY NAME ISN'T KEFKA!

Kitten: It's Ketler.

Ketler: Don't try injecting logic. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm not so stupid as to wait around somewhere where you can stop me.

With that, he flourishes his cape and dashes off.

Bruce: Merrix, will his plan really work?

Merrix: Ketler may be dumb, but he is a d'Cannith. We just thought if we ignored him he'd grow some humility and common sense.

Bruce: Right then. (turns significantly to d'Vol) I think we both know what this means.

Errandis: I agree.

Bruce: Heroes, UNITE!

Errandis: Villains, TO ME!

*big "heroes and villains cooperating" splash page*

Kitten: What? You were just at each others throats a minute ago!

Errandis: Think it through: what Ketler's doing is going to destroy the world.

Kitten: But you were threatening to do that.

Errandis: No, we were just threatening to annoy people. Honestly, why would we destroy the very thing we want to rule?

Kitten: Um…yeah, that makes sense.

Everyone starts running off. Bruce picks up and carries Kitten.

Bruce: Let me give you an analogy: we're all in the same boat. People like d'Vol and the rest will do anything to get to steer, but it's the really dumb people like Ketler who decide to sink the boat and have blind faith that there'll be a nearby island.

OOC: Credit to Terry Pratchett for the last bit. Not as good as what he had, but it fits the context.
rampant

03-27-07, 08:12 PM		Lily - You are enjoying this entirely too much.

Tirmek - Hold still, I wouldn't want to accidently make a coffin that fits.
Charles Phipps

03-27-07, 08:29 PM		Lilly: Well, I don't intend to allow myself to be tried.

Tirmek: Uh huh.

Lilly: I was taught by Major Legstrong on how to fight.

Tirmek: Who?

Lilly: A 20th level monk. Eventually, he died fighting my evil archrival and it came down to a final fight in a meat factory between me and my fellow student.

Tirmek: You've just quoted one of the most cliche martial arts stories of all tim...

Lilly: I have a video tape! Elina shows up in the end!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_tiBGOEoVM

Tirmek: :blink:
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-27-07, 08:39 PM		Lilly: I was taught by Major Legstrong on how to fight.……Eventually, he died fighting my evil archrival……
OOcat: I think you just killed off one of Kaizer's jokes.

Stronginthearm: Don't worry, you can always use me.

OOcat: You're a dwarf from Terry Pratchett novels. I think you're copyrighted.

Stronginthearm: So's about a fifth the stuff people use on this thread. What's your point?

OOcat: Well then, you'd better get used to ripping off your shirt.

Stronginthearm: *RIP*

OOcat: FX demon! Pink sparkles, stat!
Charles Phipps

03-27-07, 08:55 PM		Lilly: Major Legstrong isn't dead.

Tirmek: But you just said he died fighting your evil archrival.

Lilly: Then we just cast raise dead

Tirmek: :blink:

Lilly: YAH! *kicks Tirmek into a meat hook*

*Lilly is then stabbed horribly by Tirmek*

Rita: Do they do that often?

Rose: Let's just say thank god for Duct tape of healing.
rampant

03-27-07, 09:23 PM		Elina - Are you done filleting my boyfriend yet?

Tirmek - Not quite, let me finish with the salt and herb rub.

Lily - Why was I made to feel pain.

OOPhips - Do we really need to say it?

Kithle - Your pain amuses us.

OOPhips - Wait where's OORampant.

Kithle - Cackling over his precious Kingdom hearts keyblade project.

OOPhips - I should know better than to ask.

Kithle - Yes you should, here's the bill.

OOPhips - Hey! I didn't use that many vowels!

Kithle - Now you did.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-28-07, 08:49 AM		http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_tiBGOEoVM
OOcat: :zzz:
Charles Phipps

03-28-07, 09:43 AM		OOcat: :zzz:

Psst.

It's meant to be ridiculously over the top my dear.

Not actually the best fight scene ever.

That belongs to http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K06wDn3XsZE

Lilly: This is where I go after the people who STOLE MY Nintendo Wii!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-28-07, 10:11 AM		Finally the combined team of heroes and villains emerges from the villain base and finds themselves in the dinner lounge of the Super-Villain.

Random Rookie Hero: D**n! We lost him.

Kitten: Wait, I have the ability to detect insanity inherited from my father. *concentrating face*……………………………He’s on the stage behind a curtain!

Ketler: Gah! I’ve been found! (leaps out dramatically) But I still have this! (flourishes the button) One false move and I destroy the world!

Audience: GASP!

Errandis: Ketler, think about what you’re doing! The damage to the crust will—

Ketler: :confused: Who said anything about damaging the crust? I’m going to destroy…(activates the giant screen behind Lilly to show a view of a certain large, gleaming grey fire)…THE SILVER FLAME!

Everyone else (except Kitten): Oh.

Kitten: Huh? What? Isn’t the Silver Flame important for keeping a bunch of demons locked up?

Bruce: Supposedly. However there was this famous book recently that broke the case completely open when it presented evidence that the Church of the Silver Flame had been hiding a terrible secret: the silver flame is really just a funky barbecue grill for couatl.

Errandis: Plus most of those so-called “trapped” demons spend their time at resort complexes in the Demon Wastes playing golf and complaining that the world way too chaotic on its own.

Kitten: This world is certainly anti-climactic. :bored:

Ketler: NO! I AM THE GREATEST GENIUS OF THIS WORLD, I WILL IT’S MASTER! *press button*

Nothing happens to the view of the Silver Flame.

Ketler: WTF?!
**********
Back on our Eberron the Silver Flame shuts off. However, all the trapped demons, knowing what lives aboard the Forgotten Freedom, wisely decide to stay locked up.
**********
Lilly: That reminds me: you know, I’m a Flamer. Yup, I’m from Karrnath but my family’s Silver Flame. I attribute all my problems growing up to the Church. Because, you know, you had to get up real early to go to mass. Lack of sleep stunted my brain. And then there was the weird stuff they did. Weirdest? Okay, we’re talking about the Silver Flame, people who did the whole Lycanthropic Purge, the people who stand on street corners and tell you you’re going to Dollurh. Weirdest thing they did during mass? It was peace…… ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mviO_11no-A&mode=related&search=).

Meanwhile Ketler presses the button furiously.
**********
The Silver Flame of the Forgottenverse flickers on and off like a lightbulb. A female figure with feathered wings slumps out. In the end the flame is left on.
**********
Ketler: (begins patting his clothes as if he’s looking for a pocket) I’m sure I left it somewhere……(pulls out a piece of paper)…aha, here we go—

Beam of blue light: *SHOOP!*

The piece of paper flutters down. Aaron walks over and picks it up.

Aaron: It’s instructions. He didn’t even build the thing itself.

Bruce: What’s the company?

Aaron: “Smart Evil Lmt.”

Kitten: Um, grandpa?

Bruce: I know, the villains are gone.

Kitten: Just so long as it’s okay.

Bruce: Well, they should have done some big flashy exit while shouting something like “CURSE YOU!”, but under the circumstances we can let it slide.

Kitten: Wonder what happened to Ketler…………
************
Kelter appears in a clear tube in a highly advanced room. There is a screen on one wall showing the stage he was just on.

Meanwhile two thin figures with long, pointy ears turn from the screen to Ketler.

Elf 1: Greetings, inhabitant of the planet with 12 moons.

Elf 2: You are no doubt overawed by our superior appearance.

Elf 1: We are a species of magical creatures with lifespans your kind can only dream of—

Elf 2: —and we have supreme masters of both magic and a form of combat utilizing curved wood and string to propel a projectile of wood tipped with metal.

Elf 1: We are known by the mighy name of—

Ketler: —elves?

Elf 2: By the Great Effeminate One!

Elf 1: You have heard of our kind?

Kelter: Oh, sure, we have elves on Eberron. More than one kind, actually.

Elf 2: Impossible!

Elf 1: The fact that you did not immediately recognize us as superior beings means there cannot be elves on your planet.

Ketler: No, really. (searches pockets again, coming back with a magazine) Just look.

One of the elves reaches through the transparent tube to take the magazine. The two of them leaf through it until they stop on an add.

Elf 2: By the spawn of the Greatly Angsty One!

Elf 1: This Elven Klein must be impossibly powerful to be able to compel dignified beings such as elves to pose like this!

Elf 2: We do not have any way of beating such a superior force.

Elf 1: We must withdraw.

Ketler: Then could you send me back?

Elf 2: What shall we do with this one?

Elf 1: He shall be useful in the Mind-Draining Labor Department.

Kelter: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!

Lilly: Aw, man, that’s unfair. One thing I’ve always wanted to do…… ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EJPH2WwH9Hg)

Audience: *laugh track*

Lilly: :shifty:………(whispered) I see tall people.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-28-07, 10:15 AM		It's meant to be ridiculously over the top my dear.
OOcat: And it just comes out rediculous.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K06wDn3XsZE
OOcat: *watches first half-minute then :zzz:*
Crystalforged

03-28-07, 11:09 AM		Kitten: Wait, I have the ability to detect insanity inherited from my mother. *concentrating face*……………………………He’s on the stage behind a curtain!
OOC: Just wanted to fix that for you. ;) Otherwise though, funny stuff.
rampant

03-28-07, 12:00 PM		Dorvos - Razza fragging essay asignments.
----------------------------------

Teiza - :D

Terra - Dammit Teiza! Get out of the aviary this isntant! And LEAVE THE POOR BIRDS ALONE!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-28-07, 03:17 PM		OOC: Just wanted to fix that for you. ;) Otherwise though, funny stuff.
OOC: Are you sure I meant it that way? :devil:
urial angel of death

03-28-07, 04:41 PM		Volrath: No sales, and no lucky finds. I might as well go back to monster making.

Elina walks in.

Volrath: :D Can always count on heroic irony.

Elina: Uncle, I'm trying to get Lilly to notice me more. Could you-

Volrath: Before you say anything, I'd like you too realize that enlarging them is not the only option.

Elina: :confused: What are you-

Volrath: *no paying attention* There is the possibility sympathetic inplants, adding a third one, or even combining them into one giant super-boob.

Elina: Eww. Unlce, I just-

Volrath: :( No one ever chooses the super-boob.

Elina: :mad: Uncle, I just wanted hair-extensions!

Volrath: Wow this is akward.
Crystalforged

03-28-07, 04:59 PM		OOC: Are you sure I meant it that way? :devil:
OOC: Well I suppose you could have meant it the way you said it, its just that to me at least it makes a lot more sense that she would inherit the ability to sense insanity from Kanatash. Although I suppose it certainly could have come from Caralot.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-28-07, 08:35 PM		OOC: Well I suppose you could have meant it the way you said it, its just that to me at least it makes a lot more sense that she would inherit the ability to sense insanity from Kanatash. Although I suppose it certainly could have come from Caralot.
OOC: Thus Kitten gets it from Caralot. Honestly, if it comes from you, what makes the least sense is what really happened.

Of course, that would cause that which makes the least sense to make the MOST sense, which would instantly negate the last statement, which would make it make the least sense again, but-

*SNAP*






...wow, you're good.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

03-28-07, 09:03 PM		OOC: Im a bit low on motavation at the moment, so Im going to put this to the EBNEs, as a lot of my plot work tends to get sidelined in the general hubub. Is anyone intrested in seeing a continuation of Chance's attack on the grey school from back during the dragonic invasion, or shall I just let the luse ends wither? Thanks.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-28-07, 09:08 PM		OOC: Im a bit low on motavation at the moment………
OOC: As so many of us are.
Is anyone intrested in seeing a continuation of Chance's attack on the grey school from back during the dragonic invasion, or shall I just let the luse ends wither?
Is it funny? If not, it would at least have to wait: we seem to be having a cool-down from Tiamat………again.
rampant

03-28-07, 11:07 PM		Big bad evil dramatic villian - And now to destroy the FF and claim its magic!

Kithle - um no.

BBEDV - What are you going to do about it?

Kithle - You people really need to look at where you hire mercanaries.

BBEDV - My army of feral spell-warped half-godzilla minotaur cleric liches?

Kithle - over there

Two goblin skeletons with carboard horns taped on and one faux alligator boot each wave at Kithle and BBEDV.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-28-07, 11:57 PM		Elina: HIYA!

Sarah: *guard* HAH!

Elina: *parry* EIGH!

Sarah: *counter* GRAH!

Maj. Legstrong: What is this? A sisterly feud?

Elina: Uh, no...

Sarah: We're training!

Maj. Legstrong: *pink sparkles* Ah, how wonderful! Here *tears off his shirt to reveal horrifyingly rippled muscles* let me help you!

Elina & Sarah: :gah: GAH!
Kaizer_Ryu

03-29-07, 02:52 AM		OOC: By the look of it, Rich just stole Lilly's big "Paladin mount summoning scene"!

http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0432.html

And there's NO SPOONYNESS!

Buttercup: Why do they keep making fun of us?

Lilly: :mad: Why did Dol Arrah have to think I was a GIRL and give me a :censored: ing UNICORN as a mount?!

-----
In Elina's hand sits a miniature Major Legstrong statue made out of psychic energy.

Maj. Legstrong: Behold! The Ultimate Defense Technique passed down through my family for generations!

Elina: :uh-huh: How did he transmute you?

Aline: (yeah, she replaced Kitsune as Elina's focus) What I want to know is WHY DID HE MAKE ME INTO HIS VISAGE?!

Sarah: :nonono: He's flexing again...

Maj. Legstrong: Come, come. Is that all?

Sarah: GRRRRRAAAAAHHH!!!

Major Legstrong grapples Sarah, trying to push her down. Elina slides through Sarah's legs, kicking out his legs and allowing Sarah to slam him into the ground behind them.

Maj. Legstrong: *pink sparkles*

Elina: (i.h.h.) What's with this guy?

Sarah: Nooooooo!!! Give me back my Ninja!

Black Hayate: Arf! *runs off with the Random Ninja in tow*
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-29-07, 07:59 AM		Roy: While we at it, Galan, where is your brother?

Lilly: Ivy was never even part of the KRM. He had to skip the exam, remember? You can't prosecute him for anything.

Roy: I know, but he was a nice guy. I liked him. Enjoyed hanging with him.

Rina: He was solid and cool.

Lilly: :twitch:……………Well, let's just put it this way… (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w1HR8r3rmJo&mode=related&search=)
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-29-07, 08:03 AM		Lilly: :mad: Why did Dol Arrah have to think I was a GIRL and give me a :censored: ing UNICORN as a mount?!
OOcat: Dude, a unicorn is a feasome combatant plus it has healing capabilities. And it's just plain cool!

Lilly: Not pink ones with tiny wings. :mad:

Silver: Chicks dig them.

Lilly: Yeah……CHICKS TOO YOUNG FOR ME!
Charles Phipps

03-29-07, 08:50 AM		Bravo on both those last posts.

Especially the chicks dig Unicorns bit.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-29-07, 09:59 AM		Especially the chicks dig Unicorns bit.
Silver: :thinks: Guys dig unicorns?

Lilly: My brother is the gay one!

Silver: Guys transformed into girls?

Trimek: Leave me out of this! :eek:

Silver: Girls transformed into guys—wait…I just realized what this ship lacks…
rampant

03-29-07, 10:08 AM		Schroedigger - Besides Chicks dig giant robots.

Bunny - Its a fact.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-29-07, 10:36 AM		Schroedigger - Besides Chicks dig giant robots.
Fangirls: *bishe-cuddle Becoming God*

Shroedigger: :eek: That's just wrong.
Crystalforged

03-29-07, 12:01 PM		Silver: Girls transformed into guys—wait…I just realized what this ship lacks…
Kanatash: You all should probably be getting scared about now.
rampant

03-29-07, 03:04 PM		Blossom - HIDE ME!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-29-07, 07:51 PM		Blossom - HIDE ME!
13: Ah, the screams of the newbie. :cloud9:

Blossom: :confused:

OOcat: Simply, we'd only change someone if it was:
—A logical development of their character.
—Funny.
And since it's neither with you, you're off the hook. :P

Kitten: Wait, isn't my sire pretty much male?

OOcat: Nice to see you back. But that's not really a transformation. It's an addition. Caralot's a female in essence.

Silver: Okay, I went over the underlying structure of the idea.

OOcat: And?

Silver: First off there's no animé we know of where a girl dresses up as a boy for anything other than temporary cover. Second, there isn't a single female in this strip suitable for becoming male.

Tirmek: Hey! Are you saying I make a good girl?

Silver: I'm just saying that there's a very tricky line between "funny" and "being stupid". For example, take Marish.

Everyone tries to imagine Marish as a male except the CC and OOcat.

Pause.

FX demon: *sound of people falling over as their brains shut off*
Kaizer_Ryu

03-29-07, 08:36 PM		Chief Justice Humes stands before the assembled crew of the FF and his fellows from the KRW.

Humes: Ladies, Gentlemen, and Other-

Terra: HEY!

Humes: -I believe we all know why we're here.

*puff of smoke reveals a giant picture of a little girl in a birthday hat*

Humes: We are here to congratulate my daughter on her 3rd birthday! :cloud9:

All: *GROAN*
rampant

03-29-07, 09:58 PM		Tirmek - Move it along I wannaget to the prosecuting.

Elina - Whyare you betraying us like this?

Tirmek - Because I hate Lily.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-29-07, 11:41 PM		Shroedigger: :eek: That's just wrong.Momo: That's ok. I still like you.

Shroedigger: Oh, uh, great...ummmm, by the way...

Becoming God: Hey son, how long are you gonna leave me with this busted leg?

Momo: ...

Shroedigger: :mymy:

Becoming God: I think you burned out the motor in my hand, too.

Momo: *angry pom*

Shroedigger: Uh, dad...I think that's en-

Becoming God: But what about all the ammunition you used when we fought that 50ft Michael Jackson robot with lazer-beam eyes?

Momo: *ANGRY POM*

Shroedigger: :eek:

*cut to scene of the two running 'happily' through a field of flowers as Momo chases after Shroedigger*

Shroedigger: *laughs* Can't catch me!

Momo: *revving chainsaw* Tee hee! Come back here!

OOC: Hard as I try, I just can't reproduce the hilarity of that image in print form. Still funny, though.
rampant

03-30-07, 01:38 AM		Serene - I got cabin fever, it's burning in my brain

Satnak - I got cabin fever its driving me insane

Corre and Teiza (wearing pirate costumes) - We got cabin fever we're flipping our banadanas

The Kittens - Been stuck up here so long we have simply gone bananas.

--------------

lyrics if anyone wants to continue
http://www.fozzy.freeuk.com/henson/lyrics/cabin.txt

Video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wKhtO8k0ILg
Zemyla

03-30-07, 04:23 AM		((OOC: I have decided to return! *Applause sign*)) After over a year of study in Adar with the latest splatbooks tomes of ancient wisdom, Sien (http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Sien) has decided to find and return to the Forgotten Freedom.

Sien: *waiting at the docking ramp, thinking* It's probably a good idea to ally myself with the man who has managed to anger the Dreaming Dark and live... as well as the Emerald Claw, the Church of the Silver Flame, House Cannith, the Lord of Blades... perhaps it isn't such a good idea after all...

*The Forgotten Freedom lands. Sien strides onboard again, hoping to get on and have the ship leave before any one of its numerous enemies decides to attack it*

Sien: And, much as I hate to admit it, it'll be good to see Captain Jarlot again...

*Rose comes out of the forecastle*

Rose: *pouring on the charm* Good to meet you, young lady. I'm Cyrus Rose, captain of the Forgotten Freedom.

Sien: ...you are NOT. Where is Jarlot?

Rose: He decided to retire, and leave the family business with me.

Sien: *muttering* I must not anger. Anger leads to fear. Fear leads to... wait, that wasn't it...

----

Kanatash: *in the hold* Use your anger! Strike him down!

----

Sien: *exhales* Never mind. At least some of the old crew should still be here... *goes below*

----

Kanatash: *snaps his intangible fingers, resulting in the sound of one hand clapping* Damn, didn't work that time, either.

278. No one shall refer to a tome of any kind as a "splatbook".
279. The changeling does not sleep on the rack.
280. ...because you can't turn the crank far enough.
281. The captain's favored weapon is not the skin flute.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-30-07, 09:12 AM		OOC: Hey, Zemyla, could you put your sig in a spoiler block so it doesn't take up so much room?
[cabin fever]
13: Ooo, ah, do the-hap-py-dance. (forms a conga line)
………………
What? Hey, Lilly needs a defense attourney.

Humes: Huh, really? I thought this was going to be an obvious one-sided court drama.

13: No, no: whenever a celebrity gets in trouble they are entitled to a legal team so annoying that at the end the jury (or other presiding entity) is quite willing to grant the accused an aquital in exchange for making their defense team rot for all eternity.

Lilly: :D Really? Great! In your face, Tirmek! :P So, who's it gonna be?

13: There is only one entity in a multiverse close enough who can produce that sort of effect for someone of your stature. (pulls the bell rope that appears nearby)

FX demon: *:evillaugh*

A great glowing rift opens up in space. Popping motes come tumbling out, with smoke and the essence of brimstone, their tempo and number increasing until they obscure any view of the rift itself. However a shadow steps amidst the chaos, tall an lean. The obscuring vile mist pulls back to reveal the most henous creature to ever wear a suit and carry a briefcase, a magnificent specimine the the field of………

Kithle: :D You rang?

Lilly: :eek:………………:( A sort of "d***ed if I do, d***ed if I don't" situation.

13: As soon as I start talking.
urial angel of death

03-30-07, 11:11 AM		Lilly disappears in a poof of smoof*.

He reappears in boat being rowwed by Kerrith. He isn't able to see very far due to the all encompassing mist.

Lilly: Why did you-

Kerrith: Would you mind handing me that cement block.

Lilly: Sure. *with much difficuty moves enormous block*

Kerrith: When Tirmek heard you were getting Kithle as a defense team-

Lilly: I don't think one person constitutes a team.

Kerrith: When that one person is Kithle it does. Now if you'd let me finish, he hired me to kill you.

Lilly: I can be raised.

Kerrith: Not if I destroy your skull. After all you know any 13th level clerics. Last I checked Mickey was 11th and Aerith was perma-dead.

Lilly: :eek:

Kerrith: *pulls out bat* Now I could only afford a wiffle-bat, so this may take a while.

*Smoof is not to be confused with smoke. It is a trademark of Habro Inc. Due to copyright laws I'm not allowed to tell you what it is. In fact just by enknowledging its existance I'm treading on dangerous waters.
Charles Phipps

03-30-07, 11:46 AM		Aerith: I'm what?

Jarlot: People forgot you are back.

Aerith: Oh dear.

Jarlot: What should we do?

Aerith: I know, I'll put on a lab coat and torture Schroedigger mentally by making the Becoming God a horrible thing to pilot.

Schroedigger: What?
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-30-07, 02:54 PM		There's a noise of somthing wooden hitting the back of Kerriths skull, he collapses unconcious to the floor. forming in the mists is Sithis holding his old apprentices staff (due to the fact Xiath ate his last one).

Lilly: you saved me.

Sithis: Indeed.

Lilly: I thought you didnt like me.

Sithis: I dont. i merely dislike Kerrith more.

Sithis begins to fade out of existance.

Lilly: No! Wait! you cant leave me here. what if he wakes up?

Sithis: I dont like you enough to do that much. im sure you'll find a way out before Kerrith wakes up and finishes killing you.

Lilly: But what if i dont?

Sithis: * only the vampric smile remains* then this will be a truly momentus day.

Sithis vanishes completely. Lilly scowls and sits there for a few moments.

Lilly: bloody vampire, i should have turned him when i had the chance.

OOC: Thanks to it being half-term and me completeing my exams (for now), i will be staring my Granny Erandis plotline soon.
urial angel of death

03-30-07, 03:19 PM		OOC: Yes it would be monumentous if Kerrith killed Spoony with a wiffle-bat. Though if that is even possible is questionable. Wiffle-bats can only deal 1d2, only deal lethal on a critical, and Kerrith's Str is lowwer than the average fetus. It is going to take a while.
rampant

03-30-07, 04:12 PM		Kithle - I will hear the charges against my Client.

Humes - Being Spoony on a sunny day.
rampant

03-30-07, 09:19 PM		Xiath (in a flaminco hat) - Ariba!

Fluffy - Chica chica boom

Slaypaw - A chica chica boom boom chic

Izzy - Chica chica boom

Nalfein (tossing fireballs) - A chica chica BOOM! BOOM! chic

Chalky, Sein, and Chanse (doing the can-can) - We got cabin fever we've lost what sense we had

We got cabin fever we're all long gone mad!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-30-07, 09:20 PM		Humes - Being Spoony on a sunny day…
Humes:…being spoony on a cloudy day, being spoony in the rain…

*FLASHBACK*

Lilly: I'm siiiiiiiigin' in the rain,/
Just toooooooootally insane./
What woooooonderful feeeeeeeeelin',/
I'm offfffff of my meds.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-30-07, 09:23 PM		We got cabin fever we've lost what sense we had
We got cabin fever we're all long gone mad!
Bunny: I'm confused.

13: Why?

Bunny: It's easy to see why the general crazyness of the FF doesn't drive people insane. But they start getting a little board and they break into song.

OOcat: The hardest part is deciding whether to write them an adventure or sell tickets.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-30-07, 09:26 PM		Elina: I could Rez him!

Sarah: ...how do you figure that? You're not a Cleric.

Elina: I'm a Spirit Shaman. Druidic magic can Rez at high enough level.

Sarah: Which you're not.

Elina: :( ............. :lightbulb We also get access to Half-Celestial abilities with enough HD.

Sarah: Which we don't have.

Elina: :raincloud ............... Wait, may be I could ask-

Aureon: I'm SO not stepping on Dol Arrah's turf. Your mother gave her the idea for the Hammer of Healing to keep us in line. That thing hurts!

Elina: :ahem:

Aureon: Besides, you know how the Keeper gets.

-----

Keeper: MINE!

Kol Korran: HEY! That's a limited edition!

Keeper: MINE!

Kol Korran: You're gonna bend the pages!

Keeper: MINE!

Kol Korran: :eek: Don't take it out of the wrapping! YOU'LL DEMINISH IT'S VALUE!

Keeper: MINE! *pulls it out and begins reading*

Kol Korran: http://darthno.ytmnd.com/

-----

Elina: ...Mom?

Terra: Once you've finished your homework.

Elina: *points at Sarah* Ha-ha!

Sarah: You're still, like, a week behind.

Elina: :banghead:
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-30-07, 10:03 PM		Elina: I could Rez him!
OOcat: Who? :confused:

Bunny: Probably Sithis.

Silver: Rezed? Nah. He's just suffering from HBIND.

OOcat: To……curious……HBIND?

Silver: Hot Babe In Nighty Deficiency. Well-known condition among modern vampires.
rampant

03-30-07, 11:09 PM		Michael - My sanity is hanging by a thread

Doog's ghost - Since we're going nowhere I've gone out of my head

Roosevelt - We were sailing sailing over the bounding main

Tirmek - and now we're not RIP! KILL! PAIN!
Kaizer_Ryu

03-31-07, 02:18 AM		Silver: Hot Babe In Nighty Deficiency. Well-known condition among modern vampires.
Sarah: :( Not to mention adorable wolf-girls.

Silver: Did you try "The Face"?

Sarah: Yes! And e still wouldn't do it!

Flashback

Tirmek: Um...no.

Sarah: Please?

Tirmek: No.

Sarah: :bigeyes: Please?

Tirmek: I'm sorry, it's too much.

Sarah: *ENORMOUS WEEPY COW-EYES WITH STARS AND HEARTS* Pweese?

Tirmek: (i.h.h.: Must...resist...!) *Rolls natural 20 on all fifteen Will Saves* Skirts and dresses are one thing. A lace nighty is a whole 'nother creature.

Sarah: :allalone:

End Flashback

Sarah: :D E did let me do a photoshoot of 'em in my favorite outfits to make up for it, though.
rampant

03-31-07, 02:59 AM		Sarah: :D E did let me do a photoshoot of 'em in my favorite outfits to make up for it, though.

Ketty - :twitch:
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-31-07, 07:08 AM		Silver: Hot Babe In Nighty Deficiency. Well-known condition among modern vampires.

No wonder they're all broody and angsty all the time. or in Sithis's case just plain violent...

*Somwhere below deck*

a Red shirt walks along, whisteling a merry tune. a shadow moves. he turns.
Nothing. the redshirt continues to walk along though a bit more cautious.
he feels somthing move out of the corner of his vision. he turns, once again to see absoluetly nothing. turning back round he then notices the towering figure of Sithis.

Redshirt: Oh sh-

Narrator: The following scene has been censored due to its extremely violent content. please watch this scene of lovely little kittens dancing to a quiet relaxing tune.

( over the music can be heard)

Redshirt: MY ARM!!! YOU'RE TEARING OF MY ARMMMM!!! * sound of flesh and bone being torn as well as the sound of blood splattering*

this is followed by the narrator going pale as he hears the tortured screams of the doomed redshirt. the screams die down. completely silent.

Narrator: and now we can return to our current program.

Scene Shifts to Sithis, now looking a lot less angry, not even covered in one drop of blood and walking about a corner. behind him, horrible blood splatters can be seen on the walls and floor.
Spotting the Narrator Sithis scowls,

Sithis: Chalky. he's all yours.

he then walks off happilly to the sound of Chalky devouring the still alive narrator.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-31-07, 08:40 AM		[…use of the "e" pronoun…]
OOC: I hate to be the one to be Grammer-Nazish about a rule that I simply made up, but "e" is for beings with no gender. I have no idea what pronoun to use for ones that change genders.
Kaizer_Ryu

03-31-07, 12:24 PM		OOC: I hate to be the one to be Grammer-Nazish about a rule that I simply made up, but "e" is for beings with no gender. I have no idea what pronoun to use for ones that change genders.OOC: Could I just use the gender descriptor that's appropriate for him/her at the time? I'm just worried it might get confusing.

And the following is merely for future consideration. :D

Ketty - :twitch:Sarah: What's wrong, ma'am? He's being romantic in his own way.

Ketty: I may be getting ahead of myself, but one of the more disturbing long-term consequences of this shapeshifting has occured to me.

Sarah: What about your mantra? "As long as he gets you grandchildren"? :D

Ketty: :twitch: Considering how you were concieved, that may make things worse.

Sarah: :confused: ..... :thinks: ..... :lightbulb :plotting: :evillaugh :schemes:

Tirmek: :eek: Mother! What have you done?!

Ketty: .......I think I need a drink.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-31-07, 01:24 PM		Ketty: .......I think I need a drink.
Erk: This is why there's a bar on board.
rampant

03-31-07, 01:36 PM		Devon - Grab your partner by the ears
Lash him to the wheel

Feal-Thas - Kinky

Devon - Do-si-do step on his toe
Listen to him squeal

Feal-Thas - Aaaaaaah

Devon - Allemande left, allemande right
It's time to sail or sink
Swing your partner over the side
Drop him in the drink

Feal-Thas - Ketty please I can't Flyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
Charles Phipps

03-31-07, 01:59 PM		Lilly's trial

Judge Jarlot: GUILTY!

Lilly: Oh come on!

Judge Jarlot: Oh FINE! We'll have a trial.

Lilly: Thank you.

Roy Paladinmount: We want him charged with desertion! Which is a 30 day period in the lockup!

Rita Hawkbat: Yes!

Tirmek: Yes, well I added a few other crimes to make sure we get him on one or two thousand.

Roy Paladinmount: Planetary destruction? Literring? Unnatural acts with unicorns?

Lilly: HEY! YOU PROMISED THOSE PICTURES WOULD NEVER GET OUT!

Tirmek: I'm a Rakashasa, I lied.

Lilly: Jerk.

Tirmek: In any case, we ask for death. Here is exhibit A for the charge of using black magic.

Lilly: Oh no!

Judge Jarlot: Lilly and you a Paladin!

Tirmek: Breaking the Law of Human Transmutation by attempting to bring back his mother Zella back to life and instead bringing some unholy and natural back into this dimension!

Lilly: Please, don't show that tape!

*Tirmek slides the tape into the court video player*

***

Lilly: COME FORTH FROM THE ALCHEMICAL ELEMENTS MY CREATION!

*A poof of titanic explosive force fills the air before something diabolical emerges*

http://www.webdeveloper.com/animations/bnifiles//kittydv.gif

***

Courtroom: GASP!

Lilly: YOU DARE CALL MY MAGIC UNNATURAL!?! FOOLS!
rampant

03-31-07, 02:22 PM		Tirmek - You better hope we kill you at this point, because after that bit with the unicorn photos Elina asked to borrrow Teiza's skinning knife.

Lily - Eep

Tirmek - Here we have a recording of lily consorting with a known agent of Tiamat.

Lily - Hey we didn't know she was-

Tirmek - She liked you didn't she.

Lily - What about Elina?

Tirmek - One charge of Illegal use of Dominate monster on a minor.
Charles Phipps

03-31-07, 02:23 PM		OOC: So how long until a storyline where Kitten finds out she's been marketed as HELLO KITTEN merchandise by Ketler?
rampant

03-31-07, 02:29 PM		Lily - Aren't you gonna I don't know defend me?

Kithle (trimming his nails into the bailiff's eyes) - Why would I do that?
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-31-07, 02:45 PM		Tirmek: Breaking the Law of Human Transmutation by attempting to bring back his mother Zella back to life……
Lilly: It's called raise dead. :confused:
and instead bringing some unholy and natural back into this dimension!
Lilly: It's not my fault! The DM whipped out Heroes of Horror and used the resurrection variant!……Unholy and natural?

Tirmek: Defined as someting listed as evil in the MM.
Roy Paladinmount: ……Unnatural acts with unicorns?
Silver: Hold the F***ING F**K! None of that was unnatural!

Tirmek: Permission to treat the witness as hostile?

Silver: *über-glare*

Humes: (protects an important piece of anatomy) :hides: Overruled.
Charles Phipps

03-31-07, 02:57 PM		Tirmek: What, a Rakashasa is going to call something unnatural?
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-31-07, 03:07 PM		The air begins to become thicker and static begins crackling across every available surface. bursting from the deck come two huge curved pillars of cracked marble, their forms inscribed with various runes in both draconic and elven. lightning crackles between them as a tear begins to form. first small but then larger and larger. with a thunderclap it opens and somthing steps out.

a huge skeletal form lumbers from the gate, decaying flesh hanging from its bones. in its eye sockets is a baleful red glow. it growls releasing the putrid smell of decay.
Then a small aged elven woman dressed in black robes and carrying a walking stick steps out from behind it

Granny Erandis: Bad wuffles! BAD! no frightening the mortals. * raps the walking stick against its leg*

Wuffles: * disappointed noise*

Granny Erandis: Sorry im late dearies, but the traffic was horrible.

several robed figures also come through the gate, lugging several crates worth of baggage contianed in various suit cases

Granny Erandis: *turning to the robed figures* Oh do be careful George. no not like that! out it down Gently.

Crashing noise as George drops what ever he was carrying.

Granny Erandis: *sighs* you just can't get good help these days can you. *turning back to the bewildered crew* Well? what are you all standing there gawping at! go fetch my useless relatives.

as the crew scramble into action she turns back to berrate the robed figures once more.
rampant

03-31-07, 03:27 PM		Tara - Hello granny.

Feal-thas (hanging off the railing) - I'm ok!

Ketty - Move it oaf*punt*

George - I hate my liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii- *splat*
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-31-07, 03:57 PM		a huge skeletal form lumbers from the gate, decaying flesh hanging from its bones. in its eye sockets is a baleful red glow. it growls releasing the putrid smell of decay.
Then a small aged elven woman dressed in black robes and carrying a walking stick steps out from behind it

Granny Erandis: Bad wuffles! BAD! no frightening the mortals. * raps the walking stick against its leg*
OOC: Between Kale and I we've pretty much sucked the respect out of Errandis d'Vol.
Charles Phipps

03-31-07, 04:31 PM		Tirmek: Uh huh and what did Lilly do to you next?

Kobold: He proceeded to smash my head in with a mace!? Then he burned down the Kobold burrow!

Elina, Lawyer for the Defense: Objection!

Judge Jarlot: On what grounds?

Elina, Lawyer for the Defense: Cause Kobolds Suck.

Judge Jarlot: Sustained.

Tirmek: Dammit!

Elina: Now, I'd like to submit my own tape that the prosecutor is unfit for his position.

Tirmek: HA! My record is spotless!

Elina: This is from Sarah's days before she went into rehab AND AFTER HER BOYFRIEND GOT HER HOOKED!

Tirmek: That's a lie!

*Elina slides in the tape*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CVYO2n13ujU&mode=related&search=

*pause*

Tirmek: It was a dark day for me. I blame Spooniness for driving me to it.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-31-07, 04:49 PM		Elina, Lawyer for the Defense
13: OBJECTION! This individual is not annoying enough to be a lawyer for this sort of celebrity client.
rampant

03-31-07, 04:56 PM		Kithle - Don't bother it's not like it matters.

Lily - Are you saying its hopeless.

Kithle - For who?

Lily - ME!

Kithle - Why do I care again?

Lily - This is your job dammit :mad:
Charles Phipps

03-31-07, 04:59 PM		Lilly: Well, I guess I'll just have to mount a musical defense.

Kithle: What?

Lilly: This is why I'm spoony. I'm an ADVENTURER!

*pulls out mike*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sl71ckyuRsw

Kithle: I think we need a ban on music videos at this point.
rampant

03-31-07, 05:08 PM		Tirmek - I call Mr. paladinmount to the stand, please explain the conditions underwhich spoony abandoned his position in the karnnathi military.

Lily - Objection! My name is Lily Galan!

Judge Jarlot - Overruled spoony.
Charles Phipps

03-31-07, 05:12 PM		Lilly: Can I kill Tirmek then?

Jarlot: ....mmmmmm...

Tirmek: HEY!

Jarlot: I'm sorry, you seem to be assuming the Judge doesn't think you suck too.

Tirmek: Maybe I should have lobbied for a Captain who wasn't subceptible to bribery.

*Lilly hands over a bottle of rum*
rampant

03-31-07, 05:20 PM		Kithle - Excuse me, but need I remind the court who has the keys to the booze locker.
Charles Phipps

03-31-07, 05:25 PM		Lilly: A Knock spell?

Kithle: PALADIN!

Lilly: Ah, but only EVIL than chaotic acts now take away Paladindom.

Kithle: Dammit.

Tirmek: This Lilly seems too smart to be Lilly.

Elina: We got him a Pearl of Wisdom for Dol Dornmas. He ate it.
Lord Kale Fangblade

03-31-07, 05:31 PM		OOC: Between Kale and I we've pretty much sucked the respect out of Errandis d'Vol.

I'll never be able to face Erandis d'Vol with a strait face ever again.
rampant

03-31-07, 05:33 PM		Kithle - Are you people almost done, Some of us have more important things to do than torment Spoony jr.

Blossom - I can't help but think you really don't care what happens to my brother.

Kithle - Wake me up when we get to the closing statements.
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-31-07, 05:50 PM		Just then a bunch of crewmen dressed in fruit burst in the courtroom sing "We got cabin fever". They start forcing people to dance with them. It take a while to sedate them all.

Judge Jarlot: Now that there is order in the court—

Humes: Wait, when did you become the judge? Baliff!

Animated Armor: Sir.

Humes: Escort this man back to his seat.

Jarlot: I'm the captain of this ship—

Humes: And I'm the Chief Justice as appointed by Fürher Paladinmount.

Animated Armor: Come along now.

Jarlot: I demand a hearin……

Humes: Good, now that that's settled…(looks over to the defense table)…OMG! The defendants missing!

Tirmek: He must have ducked out while we were being distracted by that crowd of crazed crewmembers!

13: :bored: Redundant much?

Humes: Search the ship! And add "escaping arrest" to the list of charges.
rampant

03-31-07, 05:55 PM		Tirmek - Way ahead of you, I also got resisting arrest, failure to appear in court, and being spoony while on the lam.

Kithle - :zzz:
Charles Phipps

03-31-07, 06:01 PM		Chief Justice Humes: In any case, we've got to wrap up this case.

Major Paladinmount: Yes, we've been given orders by the Furher to find a half-Rakashasa who threatens the entire cosmos.

Tirmek: I'd be afraid if I thought these people weren't as stupid as they are.
rampant

03-31-07, 07:48 PM		Kithle - so closing arguements?

Humes - Go ahead.

Kithle - If my client is found guilty, I'll move into Roy's town.

Roy Paladinmount - I drop the charges!

Lily (pops out of hiding) - :twitch: :headexplo: THIS WHOLE TIME YOU'VE JUST SAT THERE AND LET ME GET SCARED OUT OF WHAT FEW WITS I HAVE AND YOU HAD THIS WRAPPED SINCE THE BEGINING!

Kithle - Precisely

Tirmek - ALL MY HARD WORK WASTED!

Lily - That's kinda cool.

Kithle - Now we can counter-sue for defemation of character.

Lily - NICE!

Kithle - The winnings will most likely total well into the millions of gold pieces.

Lily - +10 holy souldrinking avenger here I come!

Kithle - Which will be just enough to keep you out of poverty once my bill comes in.

Lily - :twitch:
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-31-07, 09:10 PM		Roy Paladinmount - I drop the charges!
Roy: However, there's one charge I cannot drop.

Kithle: I'll call the movers.

Roy: Being spoony.

Kithle: (puts away cellphone) Well, can't argue with that.

Lilly: :eek: You're my defense attourney. You can spin the facts.

Kithle: No one is that good a lawyer.

Chief Justice Humes: In light of such obvious evidence, the court has no joice but to find Lilly Galan, a.k.a. Ted Elric, rediculously guilty. I sentence him to spent three months with a resonably competant person in hopes of counteracting the spoonyness.

Tirmek: All RIGHT!

Humes: In light of his stellar work as prosecution, this court assigns Tirmek d'…(checks court listings)…Tharmis to be Lilly's parole officer and straight man. This court is ajourned. *BANG*

Tirmek: :twitch:

Lilly: :bored: I'm getting the stabbing feeling that more than just me was screwed here.
rampant

03-31-07, 09:20 PM		Kithle - hey humes said to wrap it up, btw here's the mover's bill.

Roy - WHAT!
Charles Phipps

03-31-07, 09:26 PM		Roy: In any case, my sentence is...

Humes: I'm the Judge.

Roy: I liked the Rum Guy!

Judge Jarlot: Where is the rum? Why is the rum gone?

Hume: The defendent is sentenced to community service supervised by the Rakashasa!

Tirmek: Woot!

Hume: Which he doesn't get to choose.

Tirmek: No!
SilvercatMoonpaw

03-31-07, 09:33 PM		OOcat: Now what do we do? We have two different endings and two different and unrelated sentances.

13: We'll force them to learn from each other and everyone else'll make fun of them.

OOcat: That sounds like a plotline.

13: You're right, screw it.

OOC: I'm probably being a jerk here, but I liked mine better. ;)
urial angel of death

03-31-07, 09:38 PM		Tirmek: You can stop hitting him now Kerrith.

Kerrith: *still hitting Lilly with wiffle-bat* But its so much fun!

Tirmek: Atleast use something that will him.
Charles Phipps

03-31-07, 09:50 PM		OOC: Meh, same event, different perspective.

:-)
rampant

03-31-07, 09:53 PM		Tirmek - (being held back by Elina and Sarah) One Stab that's all I ask! I deserve that much after all these years!

Lily - I like swords.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-01-07, 01:11 AM		Elina: :( But I don't WANT him to be un-Spoony! That's what makes him so lovable!

Sarah: Well, look at it this way. Maybe our respective boyfriends will learn to tolerate each other after this.

*moment of silence*

All Present: BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Elina: But seriously, Tirmek's nice and all, but I'd rather keep Lilly the way he is. Unreasonably optimistic and Spoony.

Volrath: I may have an answer for that.

Elina: Ummm...uncle? What's with the weird thing following you around?

Volrath: Oh, this is my new Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot. Pay it no mind.

The NPZR disappears in a puff of smoke and reappears holding someone's wallet. It then proceeds to whip out a Blundarbus and blow a passing redshirt away. After consuming the former Redshirt's brain, it's red eye glows and a mechanical voice is heard.

NPZR: Healing Systems Activated.

It then whips out a small tube and shoots a dart into Sarah's backside.

Sarah: NOOOOOO!! HE'S BACK FOR MORE! *runs away screaming*

Volrath: It also doubles as a Veterinarian.

Elina: ...okaaaaaaay...

Volrath: Now, as I was saying, I've come to the conclusion that the Spoonyness is not a learned behavior, but rather a genetic trait. After testing blood from both Spoony Jr and the somehow non-spoony WoW reject-

Blossom: HEY!

Volrath: -I've discovered that the male Galan gene is responsible for Spoonyness in the family.

Lilly: Yay!

Tirmek: No, Spoony, that's bad.

Lilly: Oh.
rampant

04-01-07, 01:17 AM		Tirmek - Well then the answer is very simple, Purge the Y chromosone from the entire family.

Lily - Why is he brandishing rusty garden shears?
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-01-07, 08:35 AM		Tirmek - Well then the answer is very simple, Purge the Y chromosone from the entire family.

Lily - Why is he brandishing rusty garden shears?
Silver: *yoinks the garden shears* That'll only stop it's spread.

Tirmek: You do realize I just want to hurt him?

Silver: :rolleyes: Mindless creatures can tell that by now.

Lilly: Ah, friend Tirmek, let us go out and slay various random monsters purely because they show up on my detect evil. You won't mind, as you are a good person who has no connection to evil whatsoever.

Silver: :bored: Note: mindless isn't the same thing as dumb. But I do have a solution………

Elina: And here I thought I'd be able to contribute to the straight relationships. :mad:
rampant

04-01-07, 12:39 PM		Tirmek - Ok when they assign us the community service, i'll just make his death look like an accident,... an accident that somehow left his soul out of contact with the rest of existance so he can't be rezzed.

Elina - We can all here you.

Tirmek - Doesn't matter.

Lily - I like swords.

Tirmek - See.
Charles Phipps

04-01-07, 04:14 PM		Tirmek: In any case, I...

Stewie: Oh Tirmek?

Tirmek: Yes?

Stewie: Well, I hate to be the one to remind you. But you bet me fifty gold pieces that you'd get a death sentence.

Tirmek: Oh right, well I'll get you the money by next Thursday.

Stewie: Yeah, about that....err....just have it by tomorrow and there won't be any problems.

*Tirmek pauses*

Tirmek: What sort of problems would there be?

Stewie: Pffft, what I'm not psychic man. Just....have the money ready by then.

Tirmek: Errr....sure.

Aerith: Oh there you are Stewie.

*Picks up her baby boy*

Stewie: Tomorrow! *smile*

Tirmek: That was strange.

Sarah: Geez Tirmek, betting with Stewie, are you crazy?

Tirmek: What?

***

The Next Day

*Tirmek gets out of the shower, shakes off his cat fur, puts on a towel and heads to the door*

*opens it and Stewie is on the other side*

Stewie: So, got my money?

*Stewie sucks on his glass bottle*

Tirmek: Errr, you know what, I completely forgot. I'll have it to you by Friday.

Stewie: Huh, funny, I thought I said to have it by today.

Tirmek: Well I don't got it, I don't know what to say.

*Stewie smashes a bottle over Tirmek's face as the shards are in his face*

Tirmek: AH! GODS DAMMIT!

Stewie: Ya think ya can cheat me!

*Kicks Tirmek in the knees, drops him down*

Stewie: Where's mah money! Where's mah money ass!

*Stewie starts pummeling him*

*Stewie pulls then off the bathroom bar and starts clubbing the rakashasa with it*

Stewie: MAH MONEY!

Tirmek: I'll have it by five o'clock!

Stewie: You better!

***

later

*Tirmek walks out wearing a cast and leg brace*

Elina: My God Tirmek, what happened to you?

*Tirmek pauses as Stewie stares at him from Aerith's arms*

Tirmek: I fell down the stairs.

Stewie: Huh, you should be more careful.
rampant

04-01-07, 04:41 PM		Volrath - What I want to know is how he managed to stuff 50 gold pieces individually. I mean if he had just jumped you and shoved a roll down your throat that I could understand, but he held you down long enough to stuff them into your stomach one-by-one. Being beat is one thing, but this is just sad.

Stewie - Shut up and get me a laxative.
Lord Kale Fangblade

04-01-07, 06:46 PM		Feal-Thas: Dont worry, im fine. hey george, you ok?

George: *weeze of pain* my back....

Feal-Thas: *mystified* what?

George: ....... sitting ...back

Feal-Thas: pardon?

George: you're sitting.. on my back.

Feal-Thas: Oh. right. sorry. *gets up, looks down* ouch. thats going to leave a mark. *turning to Ketty* Nice shot

Ketty: I was aiming for the big skeleton thing.

Feal-Thas: *blanch*

Granny Erandis removes a silver bell from her Little Handbag of Ultimate Holding(tm)

Granny Erandis: *chimes the bell* Igor!

out of nowhere, without any kind of special effect at all, one of Eberrons inuamrable Igors appears only told apart by his different pattern of scars, three thumbs on his left hand two on his right and posessing one green and one blue eye.

Igor: you rang mithtreth?

Granny Erandis: Igor, would you be a dear and heal George? he seems to have sustained major injuries from having one of my relatives dropped on him.

Igor: of courth Mithtreth. * limps towards George.

Granny Turns to her now assembled relatives, with wuffles sulking behind her.

Granny Erandis: Where's that Layabout partner of you'res Tara?

Tara: He's in the Dark Libary with Sithis, We had a little problem with Dust demons.

Granny Erandis:*puzzled* Dust demons?

Tara: They're a lifeform unique to the Forgotten Freedom Granny. we call them demons because they're so difficult to get rid of.

* Scene Shift, to the Dark Libary.*

Naz'roth rolls an enlarged maximised delayedblast fireball into a pile of unsorted books, turns and dives behind the cover of a nearby overturned desk.

KABOOOMMM!!!!

he pauses and waits for his ears to stop ringing before looking over the desk.
Sithis also peers out from behind a nearby wall.

Sithis: Is that all of them?

Naz'roth: *standing up and brushing down his clothes* I think s-

RRRAAAOOOORRRR

Naz'roth: Or maybe not.

a billowing wirlwind of dust rises from the pile of books, it swirls in on itself condensing into the form of an twenty foot tall Extremely miffed and slightly singed vaugly bi-pedal horned thing.

Sithis: Crap.

**** Return to Granny Erandis****

Tara: Im sure they'lll be up in a minuet or two.
rampant

04-01-07, 08:05 PM		Ketty - What business do you have with my daughter Lich?
Kaizer_Ryu

04-01-07, 10:05 PM		OOC: You're on fire, Kale. *snicker* Dust Demons *snicker*

You've not only managed to suck out any respect Erandis had left but also turned a Rajah into comic relief and made a common household chore into a life-and-death struggle.

And it didn't have anything to do with cleaning out the fridge. :D

I present you with the :mage: trophy for best presentation of dysfunctional family life gone Epic.
Charles Phipps

04-01-07, 10:22 PM		OOC: Oh and a Family Guy acknowledgement for the Tirmek and Stewie scene.

:-)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h1QTlUq3ClU
rampant

04-02-07, 12:04 AM		Tirmek - Ok What inane task do I have to make sure he completes. Probably taking the form of a series of comedic skits that either frustrates me to the point I do it for him, or he completes it at the last second but it falls apart in about a minute.

13 - its no fun if he's expecting it.
Lord Kale Fangblade

04-02-07, 08:24 AM		Ketty - What business do you have with my daughter Lich?

Granny Erandis: Buisness? i merely wish to visit the latest in my long line of relatives. *Igor whispers in her ear, she nods* Oh do excuse me dears, work seems to follow me everywhere. i'll be but a moment.

Feal-Thas: *pathing to Ketty* She's lying. she never visits just to see us.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-02-07, 08:54 AM		Tirmek - Ok What inane task do I have to make sure he completes. Probably taking the form of a series of comedic skits that either frustrates me to the point I do it for him, or he completes it at the last second but it falls apart in about a minute.
OOcat: A series of rebuilding trips to various places he visited and wrecked while posing as Ted Elric.
Charles Phipps

04-02-07, 09:02 AM		Lilly: Hey! THEY were the imposters.
rampant

04-02-07, 11:16 AM		Tirmek - Sure whatever *call whip* YA Mule YA!
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-02-07, 03:52 PM		Lilly: Hey! THEY were the imposters.
13: So you're saying that you really are Ted Elric?
Charles Phipps

04-02-07, 04:00 PM		13: So you're saying that you really are Ted Elric?

Lilly: I'm saying they changed the names for the anime to protect the innocent.

Stewie: Sort of like what they did with Family Guy to cover up Tirmek's less shining moments.

***

Last Year

Stewie: Thank God, the doppleganger threat is over.

Tirmek: HOLD IT! PROVE YOU'RE THE REAL Stewie! I just had to deal with a smart Lilly!

*Tirmek waves a sword in sheer panic*

Stewie: Your girlfriend is an idiot.

Tirmek: Everyone knows that!

***

Stewie: Yeah, no one wants to get moments like that out.
rampant

04-02-07, 04:01 PM		Ketty - Do not attempt to decieve me Lich. I know deception, I know lies, I know misdirection on levels you will never fully comprehend. State your full intent or I shall tear the knowledge from your bleeding soul.

Feal-thas - Souls don't bleed.

Tirmek - They do when mom's done with them.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-02-07, 04:12 PM		Tirmek - They do when mom's done with them.
Bunny: :cloud9:
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-02-07, 04:46 PM		Lilly: I'm saying they changed the names for the anime to protect the innocent.
OOcat: Protect the what now? :confused:
Lord Kale Fangblade

04-02-07, 06:58 PM		Ketty - Do not attempt to decieve me Lich. I know deception, I know lies, I know misdirection on levels you will never fully comprehend. State your full intent or I shall tear the knowledge from your bleeding soul.

Granny d'Vol: there are two reasons for my precence, the first is that as new members of this family you will both need to be filled in on certain details. i suggest that this would be best performed in somewhere more secure and comfortable. Tara?

Tara raises her hands and makes a complicated gesture, a red glow forms around Feal-Thas, Tara, Granny Erandis, Ketty and Tirmek and the scenary shifts, blurring indestincly as it rushes past them. in an instant, they're now stood in one of the Dark Citadels* private rooms.

Granny Erandis gestures for them to sit down at the table. in the distance a faint BOOM can be heard followed by a splintering noise.

Granny Erandis: *now sitting, turns to Adress Tirmek and Ketty*
As new family members you are now privy to All but a few of the Secrets that belong to the d'Vol line. Seeing as Sa'vor, the current holder of the houses Leadership is now no longer living, and we havnt been able to replace him.
I, as oldest family member am required to fill you in. before we can continue, i must make it known that none of the information that you are about to recieve is allowed to leave this room. Do i have you're oathes that you will not, under willing circumstances, give this information to non-house or uninitiated house members?

* Formerly known as Sav'ors Citadel
OOC: Due to its future plot content, the rest of this scene will be continued in PMs, between me and Rampant. of course, i will be continuing the Dustdemons scene.
rampant

04-02-07, 07:12 PM		Tirmek - Please excuse me, my loyalty is to the Tharmis line. If I see sufficient benefit to Ketty or Xiath by betraying the rest of you I'll do it.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-02-07, 07:50 PM		Granny Erandis: ……… Do i have you're oathes that you will not, under willing circumstances, give this information to non-house or uninitiated house members?
Commentary Crew: Oh, we swear. :devil:

(In "stepping away so they can't possibly hear you despite the fact that you are indeed within hearing distance of a deaf person": )

13: So what constitutes unwilling?

Silver: Does "screamed out during :pile: " count?

Bunny: Why is she worrying? Anyone in this room can kill people faster than Lilly can do something stupid.
rampant

04-02-07, 07:53 PM		Lily - OH YEAH! *presses giant red button while screaming " IT CAN"T POSSIBLY GET ANY WORSE"*
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-02-07, 07:59 PM		Lily - OH YEAH! *presses giant red button while screaming " IT CAN"T POSSIBLY GET ANY WORSE"*
All of the dangerous systems shut down and the screen flashes this in red and white:
WARNING!
Moron is at the computer!!!

[OOC: From this (http://missmab.com/Comics/Vol_362.php) comic.]
rampant

04-02-07, 08:22 PM		Lily - That still leaves the

Obligatory raincloud starts raining over lily.

Lily - Well my world makes non-sense again.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-02-07, 08:49 PM		Elina: *dressed in a white shirt and plaid skirt* It's ok, Lilly. I'm here for you.

Lilly: *now soaked by the still pouring raincloud* :confused: What's with the schoolgirl outfit?

Elina gives him a BIG hug.

Lilly: But...now you're soaked t- :mymy: :drool:

Elina: :devil:

-----

Silver: :D School girl/wet t-shirt combo. It never fails.
ratslinky

04-02-07, 09:20 PM		*Ashzuri meditated she let herself float there trying to find inner peace. She new she was getting closer she was so close to the state her master called Reshsaki sh- something caught her eye it was small and transparent. She flew a little closer she saw it float it would fall onto one of the few bits of land in the Azure sky. She flew even closer and she saw its shape and recoiled. Quickly she flew off to tell her master she had never seen anything like this but her master might know. That night she dreamed she dreamed her normal dream of soaring threw the sky of feeling the wind on her face and then feeling Reshsaki. Of flying back to her master so much wiser and talking to him of all her discovery's she dreamed of going to sleep more peaceful than ever and then her dream became a nightmare the thing she had seen draining the Reshsaki out of her of it leading an army of demons to crush her kind and turn the Azure sky into a dark shadow of itself. She woke panting and in felt the cold sweat on her there was no army of demons or even the object that had so scared her she went back to sleep soon enough but could not shake the feeling that something was wrong. Far away in the Azure sky the object came to rest and all around it the land blighted. The object was a ghostly demonic hand.*
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-02-07, 10:16 PM		Lilly: But...now you're soaked t- :mymy: :drool:
Tirmek ports in.

Tirmek: Let's go, "Ted". We…(sees Elina)…If I ever do that, please kick me hard in the head.

Lilly: (gets dragged off) :weep:
Charles Phipps

04-02-07, 10:45 PM		Tirmek, Stewie, and Lilly in a floating rowboat

Tirmek: So, we've been together 24 hours.

Lilly: Yeah.

Tirmek: Straight.

Lilly: Yeah.

Tirmek: Without killing you.

Lilly: Not for lack of trying.

Tirmek: Wow. I don't believe it but I think that I may actually have to leave Sarah, the love of my life, just to make sure I never meet you again.

Stewie: Go for it man!

Lilly: Oh come on, she loves you....

Tirmek: No...I can't...not even to get away from Lilly.

Stewie: Oh come on, she hasn't been the same since she dyed her fur blonde.

Tirmek: I admit, she has been a bit...ditzier.

Stewie: Sarah was Ditzy before. Now she is the Godzilla of ditzy.

Tirmek: Well....

***

The Previous Day

Sarah: Hey look! A paper bag!

Tirmek: Yeah, so?

*Sarah crawls into it*

Sarah: Oh my gods! I'm lost!

***

Stewie: Alright Tirmek, you can do this. You can dump her, because once it's done, never again will you have to listen to her talk like this? You know, where everything has a question mark at the end of it? With an upward inflection? At the end of every sentence?

Tirmek: Yeah, I don't know what I was thinking? Oh dammit, now I'm doing it too!

*Tirmek gets off the floating boat*

Stewie: Well, that's done. Now I can watch Tirmek be miserable for the rest of his life.

Lilly: It won't work.

*three hours later*

*Tirmek returns*

Stewie: What the hell? It took you three hours to break up with her?

Tirmek: Errr...not exactly.

Stewie: What's that smell? Smells like sweat and anger and shame.

Lilly: I like Swords.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-03-07, 08:51 AM		Stewie: What's that smell? Smells like sweat and anger and shame.
OOcat: ARGH! It is this ignoble abiguity that prevents myself from commenting on this most comedic of occasions.

Bunny: What's with the E.B.N.E.? :bored:
rampant

04-03-07, 10:22 AM		Lily - *sweat, pant, work* Don't they have Warforged workers in Karnnath?

Tirmek - They're busy repairing important things that they don't trust you with, like roadsigns.

Lily - Oh *looks the otherway*

Tirmek - Ok he's not looking go go go.

A squad of 'forged sneak past Lily, and exit the country.
Charles Phipps

04-03-07, 11:02 AM		OOcat: ARGH! It is this ignoble abiguity that prevents myself from commenting on this most comedic of occasions.

Bunny: What's with the E.B.N.E.? :bored:

Believe me, I had a much longer scene where Tirmek determines why not to break up with Sarah.

But yes, coming up....

MORE SARAH AND TIRMEK RELATIONSHIP FUN!
Lord Kale Fangblade

04-03-07, 11:31 AM		RAAOOOORRRRRR!!!!

Sithis is sent hurtling though the air by the Dust demons fist. as he lands he rolls to his feet once more, sending a Vitrolic Blast at the thing.
The acid splashed against the creatures dust form, causing it to scream in pain. It snarls, casting its gaze at Sithis. Its legs become a swirling storm of dust as it rises from the books.

Sithis draws his curved long sword and activates the Air elemental inside his own armour and charges. The Dust Demon attempts to swat him with its large paw like hand. Sithis steps back, and uses the rising paw as a spring board as he jumps over the creature's shoulder. unleashing the Brimstone Blast pooled in his sword into the creatures face as he passes.

Landing with cat like agility Sithis turns and takes on a defensive stance and lets the wand hidden up his sleave fall into his left hand.
The Dust demon turns, revealing the burnt ruin of its left eye and looking very very annoyed.
It opens its mouth and sucks in a breath.

Sithis: :censored:

I breathes out once more, unleashing a swirling cloud of dust that completely encapsulates Sithis. It grins toothilly at its hadiwork as Sithis is wracked with heaving coughs and turns to find the other one...

Naz'roth dives around the corner, holding a long metal tube connceted to a sack. Naz'roth smiles evily and activates it, unleashing a reversed Gust of wind effect. The Dust demon Screams as its sucked into the tube and deposited into the bag.

Naz'roth: hey Sithis, are you alright?

Sithis: were where you? and whats that?

Naz'roth: *smile* somthing i "borrowed" from Ketler, it said on the label that some mage in aundire named "Hover" made it. great isnt it?

Sithis: whats it called?

Naz'roth:Thedustsuctiondevicecreatedbyus eofreversegustofwind-forcleaningthehomeoroffice.

*pause*

Sithis: couldnt he have just called it the "hover"?

Naz'roth: thats what it said on the label.

Sithis: *sigh* Mages today.
***
Granny Erandis: Now that we have completed all the buisness that was required, I'll be able to spend the rest of my visit here with my ancestors.
rampant

04-03-07, 12:58 PM		Xiath - *CHOMP*

Erandis - That was my favorite staff.

George - My ARM!
Lord Kale Fangblade

04-03-07, 01:13 PM		Xiath - *CHOMP*

Erandis - That was my favorite staff.

George - My ARM!

Feal-Thas: yep. she deffinatly has you're teeth.
rampant

04-03-07, 01:31 PM		Ketty - :D

Erandis - And now I know true fear.

Xiath - *chomp*

Erandis - MY LUGGAGE!
Charles Phipps

04-03-07, 06:09 PM		Stewie: So, you're finally going to introduce me to Sarah.

Tirmek: You've lived here on this ship you're entire life.

Stewie: I'm two years old! That's hardly a titanic leap of time!

Tirmek: In any case, just meet with her then LEAVE.

*Door opens up and Sarah with her blonde fur walks out*

Sarah: Hey oogey.

*Sarah snuggles Tirmek*

Stewie: I don't see what you were ashamed of Tirmek, she's stunning.

Sarah: Oh, I saw a special on Ketler's TV yesterday about something called the Great War. We need to stop that!

Stewie: *pause* Were her parents brother and sister?

Tirmek: One was a half-wolf tentacle monster.

Stewie: I'm glad she favors her mother's looks.

Tirmek: That was her mother.

Stewie: Oh.

Sarah: I love my widdle Tirmek Tirmek. I started dating him because he reminded me of Garfield.

Stewie: You've got a real winner here Tirmek. A real Keeper.

Tirmek: Alright, just shut up and leave. You don't know what she's like in private.

Stewie: Obviously, what goes on in private is exactly the reason you're dating her.

Tirmek: She's a very intelligent woman! Just last night....err...

***

Last Night

Sarah: Let's go dancing Tirmek!

Tirmek: Eh, I'm not in the mood.

Sarah: Oh come on!

*Tirmek pulls out a flashlight and aims at it at the wall*

Sarah: Wow! The mysterious light is back!

*Tirmek starts moving around the light as Sarah playfully follows it, barking all the way*

***

Tirmek: Oh Gods....

Stewie: I bet Lilly never has this sort of problem with Elina.

***

Elsewhere

Elina: There's that Mysterious Light again! BARK! BARK!

*Lilly plays with the light and her*

***

Stewie: Oh well, it's not like you're the first man to date a really dumb girl because she has a nice tail.

*Stewie screamingly flies out the room's window*
rampant

04-03-07, 06:15 PM		Tirmek - Okay enough of this! *Psionic Prestidigitation*

Sarah's hair returns to its normal bluish hue.

Tirmek - Much better.
Charles Phipps

04-03-07, 06:54 PM		Tirmek: I really need money to buy Sarah a engagement ring.

Kithle: Well there's only one real place to earn money on the ship.

Tirmek: Yeah, but she wants me to earn it honestly.

Kithle: Here ya go.

Lilly Galan Enterprises Ltd

Tirmek: Oh Hell no.

Kithle: Sorry man.

*Lilly walks out in his business suit*

Lilly: Glad to see you've decided to join our little pyramid scheme Tirmek. I'm the owner, Lilly Galan.

Tirmek: How the hell did you get rich?

Lilly: The American Way. I inherited it from my parents who stole from the poor and ethnic.

Tirmek: *sigh* what do I have to do?

Lilly: This is your workstation, keep knick knacks tasteful, you get 25 minutes for lunch, and uuhhhh enjoy it here. Welcome aboard.

*Lilly walks off*

*Tirmek pauses and follows Lilly through a door to a gigantic extradimensional Palatial office with harem girls, piles of gold, and a picture of Jarlot hanging from the wall*

Tirmek: The hell?

Lilly: Oh the new fellow. What do you want?

Tirmek: Uh, what am I supposed to do here?

Lilly: You pick up the phone and SELL SELL S...

*Phone rings*

Lilly: Hold on, I have to take this.

*Lilly listens for a second*

Lilly: So which Xen'drick province are you from? The one with the civil war, the one with the cocaine, or the one with the fancy hats?

*hangs up*

Lilly: We're done here.

Hours later

*Tirmek works on a typewriter as he takes down notes between calls*

*Lilly walks in*

Lilly: That coffee mug that you have on your desk, it says life's a beach? Umm that's dangerously close to the word...b*ch isn't it?

Tirmek: Uhh, yeah that's the joke.

Lilly: Oh, absolutely! And nobody appreciates a joke like me, and you know between us, I think it's a stitch, but some of the other employees found it offensive.

Tirmek: WHAT other employees?

Lilly: Cutethulhu.

:coolcthul: THAT HAS NO PLACE IN THIS OFFICE!
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-03-07, 09:07 PM		Tirmek: I really need money to buy Sarah a engagement ring.
Silver: Cellllllllll-a-brate good times, C'MON!!!!!
:w00t: :cheer: :cheer: :w00t:
:ayyyy!: :ayyyy!:
:bounce: :bounce: :bounce:
Kithle: Well there's only one real place to earn money on the ship.
Tirmek (after two days working for Lilly): THAT'S IT, I QUIT!

Lilly: So sorry to hear tha—

Tirmek: Shut up you little F*&(^TARD! I'm through taking any more of your C%#P!

Lilly: Uh—

13: He's devolved into using symbols. How interesting.

Tirmek: Not only do I hate you anyway, but your scams are rediculously stupid! Only an idiot would fall for them, and the fact that you're actually making money means that this entire planet is populated by idiots! I can't stand there incessant dumb questions! I won't stand for it any more!

Lilly: What other choice do you have?

Tirmek: I—AAAARRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!

13: You could always go ask Erk.

Tirmek: I'm underage, I can't work at a bar.

13: No, no, no. You see, Erk knows all the employment opportunities in Lower Deck City.

Tirmek: Lower Deck City?

13: Yeah. It's this demi-plane that grew up on the lower decks from people who moved here from Sharn. It's this entire multiplanar city. There's sure to be a job opening.

Tirmek: Great. :D See ya, suckers! Have fun in idiot-land! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
********
A day later………

Tirmek: You knew this was going to happen, didn't you?

13: What, me? :angelhide

Tirmek stands in front of a family resturant, Big Momma's. His job is to stand around in a fatsuit of a humanoid woman with great, big……………"tracts of land".
rampant

04-03-07, 09:23 PM		Tirmek - *Stuffs :coolcthul: into the coffe mug* How's that for Offensive! I've been going over the books for this little scheme Lily.

Lily - Who let you by my security ogres!

Tirmek - I had glasses and a clipboard, thats all they needed. Anyway Using my authority as your supervisor for the interim, I've liquidated this companies assets and paid off your debt to society as far as cost and materials, you still have a manuel labor portion to complete of course.

Lily - I hate you.

Tirmek - Which you will do in this anduarian maid outfit.

Lily - Elina would never permit that.

Tirmek - Its her idea.
Charles Phipps

04-03-07, 09:25 PM		Lily - Elina would never permit that.

Tirmek - Its her idea.

Tirmek: And you see Lilly, this is why common sense and cunning will always triumph over dumb luck.

IRS Agent Jacob Hunter: Is this Lilly Galan enterprises?

Tirmek: Well, not an...

IRS Agent Jacob Hunter: King Steve's economic policy has noticed you're in a deficet of over three billion gold pieces. Believing that spending money is to make money, he's decided to shoulder all your debt and give a gift of three million to you. Good work.

Lilly: Thanks.

Tirmek:.....there is no God.

Lilly: Well my mom IS Khyber...
Charles Phipps

04-03-07, 09:27 PM		OOC: Bravo for both of you, both were incredibly funny posts.

It's too bad I didn't get to do the Tirmek gets fired scene.

;-)
rampant

04-03-07, 09:31 PM		Tirmek - How much would it cost to get you to grab King steve early?

Bunny - No way! He's been in seven wars in the past 5 years! Besides Evil Princess Sara would usher in an era of peace.
Charles Phipps

04-04-07, 08:02 AM		Lilly: But you're right Tirmek. I've been wrong, I've let my foolishness go to my head.

Tirmek: Hey, I have the excuse I'm evil....and not an idiot.

Lilly: Let us join together and make a company that will make SENSE! To our own benefit.

Tirmek: Really?

Lilly: Hell no! Security!

*The Chilli Monster wraps around Tirmek and throws him through a window*

Stewie: Is it just me or is something off with our paladin?

Aerith: Oh there you are Stewie....

Stewie: BACK AWAY YOU NON-EUCLIDEAN FEMALE!
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-04-07, 08:29 AM		Stewie: Is it just me or is something off with our paladin?
OOcat: Lawful Stupid with a Stick Up A**. Nope, nothing off.
rampant

04-04-07, 12:06 PM		Tirmek spends an action point to grip the window frame and pull himself back through into a perfect spiral kick to lily's head.

Tirmek - Damn I was aiming for a vital organ.
Charles Phipps

04-04-07, 12:33 PM		Stewie: Wow, that's really pathetic.

Tirmek: What?

Stewie: Oh come on, SOMMERSAULTING to kick a paladin in the face. You really can't give an inch can you.

Tirmek: I got fired by LILLY

Stewie: Oh like he even FEELS It

Lilly: Hmmm?

Stewie: Watch.

*Stewie stabs Lilly in the head with a dagger*

Tirmek: Noted.

Lilly: What?

Stewie: Learn to take your lumps like a man man.

*Tirmek stabs Lilly again*

Lilly: Something is itching.

Stewie: He's too stupid to register losing hit points. Must be the World of Warcraft blood.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-04-07, 05:30 PM		OOcat: Wait, if we're going to do another 8-bit parody we need to figure out who's who.

13: Lilly's got Fighter down pat.

Bunny: Need a Black Mage.

Silver: Tirmek?

OOcat: Not perverted or evil enough.

13: Elina.

OOcat: Not perverted. Plus I think she's had enough evil for now.

13: Stewie?

Silver: Someone who's balls have dropped, please.
rampant

04-04-07, 05:31 PM		Teiza - Ok if I nudge that over and

Momo - What you doing?

Teiza - GAH!

Teiza's experiment explodes.

Teiza - What have I told you two about startling me like that!

Scias - d....d....don't

Momo - I'm sowwy :bigeyes:

Teiza - :rolleyes: Come on you two lets go make trouble.
Charles Phipps

04-04-07, 05:32 PM		Kithle is our resident Black Mage I think.

Tirmek is Thief ;-)
rampant

04-04-07, 05:34 PM		Lily - I like swords

Sithis - STABBITY DEATH!

Gaz - Law ninjas go!

Tirmek - I hate my dad.
----------------------------

OOC: I dunno think about it the female persona, the father issues, the rampant multiclassed twinkerey.

Tirmek - Yeah but my plans work

OORampant - sure they do
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-04-07, 05:45 PM		Kithle is our resident Black Mage I think.
OOC: No, Kithle is the 1st ed parody Thief. He's ineligeble.
Sithis - STABBITY DEATH!
OOcat: Not evil or perverted, plus he's too competant.

Tirmek: I get the feeling I was just insulted.
Gaz - Law ninjas go!
OOC: Truthfully I still don't get Gaz. I can't yet see his personality structure.
OOC: I dunno think about it the female persona, the father issues, the rampant multiclassed twinkerey.
13: Since when does Red Mage have father issues?

Bunny: Since when is Tirmek a twink?

Silver: Since when has he had a female persona?
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

04-04-07, 05:51 PM		Ash "Black mage? I can manage that one, homicidal? check. Amoral, me. willing to hurt for ,ittle more than amusement? I destryed a while city to watch the fall of cinders. I am BlackMA-"

Chanse "Psion."

Ash "What?"

Chanse "Blackpsion, not the same thing, you dont qualify."

Ash "Lung use."

Chanse "What?"

Ash "You dont qualify..."

Chanse "Pard-" *Horible lunectomy violence*

Ash "I am BLACKMAGE!"

Chanse "Lungs... somwhere else... Pain... total... Self naration... inexplicable... death... wuld be sweet sweet relase..."
rampant

04-04-07, 07:43 PM		Terra - oh no, TEIZA! GET OUT OF MY AVIARY THIS INSTANT!

Teiza - :D *holding a dead ostrich in her teeth* *scampers off*
Kaizer_Ryu

04-04-07, 07:43 PM		13: Elina.

OOcat: Not perverted. Plus I think she's had enough evil for now.
OOKaizer: True, but she's a goody-goody now. Mostly.

Elina: :lightbulb: I can be White Mage!

OOKaizer: ...I feel no good can come of this.

Elina: I can make my own hammer, too! *manifests a GIANT mindblade hammer*

OOKaizer: This won't end well...

Elina: Which, of course, would mean Kerrith would have to be Black Mage.

Silver: Not evil or perverted enough.

Elina: Ok, Kerrith after completing his apprenticeship under Nalfein.

13 & Bunny: :plotting: :evillaugh

OOKaizer: Haven't we done enough messing with the timeline?

13: As long as it's funny...no.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

04-04-07, 07:58 PM		Ash "I'm beginning to think Im invisible..." :(

Chance "Then why dont you spy on Terra dressing? Shes back on the marker after all?"

Ash "Thats a stragly good idea..." heads off.
*Sounds of a deific pervert beating from terra's room, continuing for some time.*

ash stumbles back, plucked of ll feathers, brused, and with frost hoaring his skin. "n-n-noooo... W-w-we're not Invi-vi-visible..."

Chanse "You got my Lungs, I still have my brain."
Kaizer_Ryu

04-04-07, 08:02 PM		OOC: :heehee:

That's two great one's in a row, Eled. :D
ratslinky

04-04-07, 08:08 PM		OOC: Truthfully I still don't get Gaz. I can't yet see his personality structure.


OOC: Yeah I need to work on his personality a bit more but basically when he's not helping save the world he's like Kithle before Kithle was a good as he is.

Gaz: Okay you guys just sign this contract and we will be on the road. Don't its all good.

Lilly: Okay *sign contract*

Tirmek: Hm a chance to go adventure but if I recall correctly the contract that Thief gets us to sig_

Gaz: Dust of amnesia *Throw it in his face* Now sign the contract like a good shapechanger

Tirmek: Okay *Signs contract*

Sithis: Hey thats not supposed to work

Gaz: I have better sources than the original. Now I know I couldn't get you to sign the contract cause you are smarter than those to idiots

Lilly: Sword chucks yo

Tirmek: Hm I wonder if taking those ranks out of sense motive and putting them in craft cool hat was such a good idea

Gaz: Sure it was *Bluff*

Tirmek: Yeah your right thanks

Gaz: So anyway I have come up with a way to get you to sign it. You see although it means I have heaps of control over you it also means you have soul rights to killing Lilly which means not only do you get to inflict heaps of pain on him but also stop any of our foes from killing him

Sithis: Hm okay *Signs*
rampant

04-04-07, 08:17 PM		Tirmek - I still get to hurt him right?
Kaizer_Ryu

04-04-07, 08:29 PM		Elina: *PROTECTIVE GIRLFRIEND GLARE*

Sithis: :mymy: Now I remember why I haven't killed him.

Lilly: I like swords.

-----

Michael: Why do I suddenly feel a slightly higher amount of impending doom than normal?

-----

Gaz: Ok, it seems everything is in ord- HEY!

Tirmek: Something wrong?

Gaz: This isn't your signature.

Tirmek: Yes it is. It's just really small.

Gaz: It's the size of a period and no it's not. *whips out a magnifying glass* You forged the idiot Blackguard's name?

Tirmek: You can't prove that. Ink's dry and it's valid. *whispers to Sithis* I got a great deal on the Ultra-Fine Print.

*cut to scene of Kithle swimming in gold Scrooge McDuck style*

Tirmek: Of course, I got Spoony to pay for it.

Lilly: *knives buried in his head* As my best friend in the world, Tirmek has vowed to discover why I can taste sound.

Gaz: :mad: ...meh. An indentured servant is an indentured servant.
ratslinky

04-05-07, 01:16 AM		Gaz: Sorry Tirmek I didn't want to do this but meh. *Casts Heightened Mass Dominate monster and at the same time uses various potions and spell to buff up his charisma to 50*

Tirmek: Must resist overcoming spell self narration is helping

Gaz: Time to pull out the big guns *Casts quickened Major Image in the shape of Sarah doing :bigeyes: *

Tirmek: No the big eyes overcoming my will power no must resist

Image of Sarah: *In baby voice* Tirmek would you pwease let the nice man dominate you pwiddy pwease

Tirmek: NOOOOO! *Fails will save*

Gaz: Okay now sign here in readable letters

Tirmek: Yes master *Signs in words that are readable without a magnifying glass*
rampant

04-05-07, 01:22 AM		Tirmek - You do realize though I've used ketler's signature.

Gaz - DAMMIT!

Sarah - He's built up an immunity to other people's cute attack since his sister was born.

Xiath - *CHOMP*

Tirmek - my homework:weep:
ratslinky

04-05-07, 02:08 AM		Gaz: Meh just another slave
Charles Phipps

04-05-07, 07:48 AM		I wonder what would happen if Gaz tried to dominate Lilly.

I think his will save his so low it conversly protects him.
ratslinky

04-05-07, 08:56 AM		OOC: Gaz would never dominate him its a waste of spells bluff works just as well
urial angel of death

04-05-07, 11:32 AM		OOC: As long as the targets are Hesians (humans, dwarves, halflings, gnomes, or orcs) Kerrith would already be perfectly willing to go Black Mage on them. :D And he's working on perverted as the fear of his old culture slowly wears off. Though some of the things BM says to WM I honestly couldn't see Kerrith saying ever.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-05-07, 11:54 AM		OOC: As long as the targets are Hesians (humans, dwarves, halflings, gnomes, or orcs) Kerrith would already be perfectly willing to go Black Mage on them.……some of the things BM says to WM I honestly couldn't see Kerrith saying ever.
OOC: Yeah, unfortunately to be Black Mage one has to hate everyone regardless and be able to spout off bad pickup lines now matter the state of brokenness his bones happen to be in.
Charles Phipps

04-05-07, 12:24 PM		OOC: Yes, sadly no one is a perfect fit.

Oddly, elements of black mage are perfectly fine to fit in other characters.

For example, while Lilly could be fighter. Frankly, him liking Tirmek is impossible.

Still...

IC:

Lilly: Holy crap Tirmek!

Tirmek: What?

Lilly: The Book of Exalted Deeds say that paladins can have sex before marriage!

Tirmek: I thought that was obvious.

Lilly: not to me it wasn't!

Elina: What do you mean?

Lilly: HEY HOT MAMA!

Elina: Excuse me??

Lilly: Heaven must be missing an Angel and I forget the rest...lets have sex!

*Elina hits Lilly with her hammer*

Lilly: Perhaps I came on a little forward. We can have, dinner, a movie...then sex.

*WHAM*

Lilly: Would you mind if I used my X-ray glasses on you righ....

*WHAM WHAM WHAM WHAM WHAM*

Elina: There.

Lilly: I'm sorry. I was rude, I guess I don't talk to women that much and you're very pretty so I lost my head.

Elina: Well Lilly, I hope you learned your lesson.

Lilly: Yes, I WANT YOU HOT MAMA!

*WHAM*

Tirmek: I saw that one coming.
rampant

04-05-07, 12:27 PM		Tirmek - The whole world saw that coming. Even larry the blind redshirt.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-05-07, 01:26 PM		Inside Lilly's head:

13: :D *pushes HOT MAMA button*

*WHAM*

13 *snicker* *pushes HOT MAMA button*

*WHAM*

Silver: Hey, get away from that! I the only one who should be pushing that button!
Kamikaze Chicken

04-05-07, 04:05 PM		:chicken: :Walks by quietly then turns swiftly to face those behind the fourth wall: "Cluck" then walks on along the road quietly his head band blowing in the wind behind him.

we now return to our regularly scheduled hilarity.

this message brought to you by chickens incorporated, what can poultry do for you?

-end-
Kaizer_Ryu

04-05-07, 10:14 PM		Lilly: Syrania must be missing an angel, 'cause...uh...you've got a nice can!

*WHAM*

Lilly: I know you must be tired, since you've been walking through my mind all day!

*WHAM*

Lilly: If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?

*WHAM*

Tirmek: :rolleyes: He seems to forget she already has.

Sarah: Repeatedly.

Lilly: Ok...I'm sorry about before, but I really do have something to tell you.

Elina: Fine.

Lilly: Those clothes look really great on you.

Elina: Oh...thanks.

Lilly: But, baby, they'd look even better on my bedroom floor!

*WHAM*

Elina: *ANGRY POM*

Lilly: Bones...broken... Organs...ruptured... Spleen...still unaccounted for...

-----

Cuddles: Mmmmmm...spleen...

Marish: You've got a five minute break, mister.

Cuddles: Yes, dear...

-----

Elina: *sigh* Cure Serious Wounds

Lilly: Strength...returning... Bones...mended... Organs...healed... Self-narration...fading.

Elina: You know, Lilly, I was seriously considering sleeping with you.

Lilly: YES!

Elina: WAS.

Lilly: :weep:

Elina: But the offer's off the table till you can show me more respect.

Sarah: But...what if...you know...you get pregnant or something?

Elina: And here is where you would benefit by having paid more attention in biology. We're Outsiders.

Sarah: Yeah...

Elina: Magical creatures.

Sarah: Uh-huh...and?

Tirmek: Wait a minute...

-----

Inside Tirmek's head

Warforged: *wildly flailing his arms* WARNING! WARNING! DANGER, WILL ROBINSON!

-----

Tirmek: ...uh-oh.

Elina: We choose when and by whom to have children. It's a conscious decision on our part. It's impossible for us to become pregnant by "mistake".

Sarah: :blink: ... :thinks: ... :lightbulb *turns to Tirmek* :devil:

Tirmek: :eek:
rampant

04-05-07, 11:40 PM		Tirmek - *call frisbee* See the frisbee

Sarah - ... FRISBEE!

Tirmek - *charges frisbee with lightning and slings it, HARD* Fetch!

Sarah dashes off sprouting wings to pursue the flying disk.

Tirmek - 30 seconds to hide! *Quikened psionic dimension door*
DragoonDarkfire

04-05-07, 11:42 PM		We see Marik sitting across a table with a huge illusion in front of him made up of unusual shapes and patterns that are woven into completely illogical forms. Buckrill walks over.

Buckrill: what are you doing?

Marik: playing "Tenth Dimensional Chess"

Buckrill: where the hell did you get that?

Marik: Internet.

Buckrill: THERE IS NO INTERNET IN EBERRON!

Marik: There isn't?

Buckrill: NO!

Marik: oh. Well then I could have gotten it from that gift shop in Xoriat.

Buckrill: Gift shop?
____________________________

We see Marik standing in front of a gift shop surrounded by horrifying images. There's a mind flayer at the front.

Mind Flayer: I sell many things. Things that would break your mind mere mortal.

Marik: yea, yea, I heard it all. Look do you have something interesting or not?

Mind Flayer: brain in a jar?

Marik: sounds kinda useless?

Mind Flayer: Brain Slug?

Marik: No thanks. Last brain slug I got kinda died... from starvation.

Mind Flayer: well that explains why my intelligence is dropping?

Marik: It is?

Mind Flayer: DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Marik: ...

Marik sees a copy of Tenth Dimensional Chess

Marik: YOINK!
_____________________

Marik: And that's how I got it.

Buckrill: so what's the rules?

Marik: I don't know. The instructions are written in a language mortal minds cannot comprehend.

Marik picks up instructions and begins to read off from them.

Marik: "Le Game"!? What the khyber does that mean?

Buckrill: Riiiiight. So how do you know you're winning?

Marik: well I assumed I was winning cause look who I'm playing.

They see Yeth across the table with a tentacle in her mouth

Yeth: mmmmm this is delicious.

Marik: See what I mean?

Buckrill: I play loser.

Optamis walks in

Optamis: Marik, Buckrill, Yeth, I need your help.

Marik: what is it now Optamis?

Optamis: I've discovered a huge storage of ENERGON!

Marik: you mean those swirling glowing balls from-

Buckrill: I think he means "Dragonshards".

Marik: oh. Where?

Optamis: my ancient homeland of Xen'drik.

Optamis takes out an illusionary device revealing a mountain made up of Siberys dragonshard

Marik: WOA!

Buckrill: hmmm...

Yeth: OH SHINY!

Optamis: If Megatron gets his hands on this Energon then all of Eberron and Cybertron will be in grave peril.

Marik: Not to mention how we could practically BUY a Dragonmarked house with that much Dragonshard.

Optamis: then will you help me?

Buckrill: Sure.

Marik: IN!

Yeth: SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINY

Optamis: Alright. LET'S ROLL OUT!

The Autoforged symbol comes out and then flips over to reveal the Deceptiforged symbol as the scene changes.
________________

We see The Lord of Blades standing in the middle of a huge ring

LOB: So. Prime thinks he can foil my plans by making it to that Energon before I do. Does he? We'll see about that.

He turns to a huge metal scorpion

LOB: SCORPINOC!

The metal Scorpion transforms into the form of a male drow with chitin metal skin.

Scorpinoc: Yes Megatron?

LOB: gather the others. WE ARE GOING AFTER PRIME!
Kaizer_Ryu

04-06-07, 12:00 AM		OOC: :heehee

I loved the classic Autobot/Decepticon wipe. I can't wait for the movie.

But still, could it be...?

Is Marik Michael's long-lost brother?!

Jarlot: No.

But-

Jarlot: Again, no. I did not drop Michael several times as a child, sell his baby brother to a childless scion of House Deneith to pay for booze, or get in major trouble for either from Aerith.

...okaaaay...
Kaizer_Ryu

04-06-07, 12:47 AM		Sarah sits wagging her tail with the frizbee in her mouth, waiting patiently for someone to take it and throw it again.

Elina: I must admit, that was smooth.

Sarah: :bigeyes: *tail wag*

Elina: Okay, okay. *throws frizbee*

Sarah: :drool: *takes off*

Lilly: *pulls out a flashlight and turns it on*

Elina: The mysterious light! BARK! BARK!
rampant

04-06-07, 01:43 AM		Tirmek - Oiy that was rough.

Sarah - My fur hurts.

Elina - My thoughts hurt.

Sithis - My spells hurt.

Gaz - Losers:P

Tirmek - Thats rich coming from the guy who got eliminated in the first round.

Gaz - The guy who also took the skife trophy this year.

Sithis - Tomorrow is the big event guys, who else got in?

Tirmek - Sagas if he's half the tactitian he thinks he is. Vedris definately, watch her she's put together a pretty scary combo with her modified tanglefoot bags. Bezen is a shoe in for the big 8, and the favorite for the win. That leaves one spot. I figure Tellowas, its hard to beat a psychic ninja were-tiger.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-06-07, 09:43 AM		OOcat: Oh, good, now we have a plotline.

Bunny: Hey, Silver, aren't you going to do some commentary on that whole "we can only get pregnant if we want to" thing?

Silver: Mmmmmmmmm………no.

13: Scuse me, got to get back to Lilly's death sent—communty service.

Bunny: Why do you even bother? Everyone knows you're going to mess with him.

13: Being a jerk about it is part of my job.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-06-07, 09:57 AM		Tirmek and Lilly are in a taxi across the Valenar desert……

Tirmek: Since when do they have internal combustion on Eberron?

OOcat: Since I decided the world isn't pulp enough without it.

Tirmek: Okay, our next stop is this town somewhere around here called Lier. Seems you destroyed their church to Dol Arrah.

Lilly: The priest was F***IN' INSANE! He thought a polymorph any object spell was a gift from the gods!

Tirmek: He's an NPC in Eberron, they're not supposed to know that kind of magic lies around.

Lilly: He tried to kill me.

Tirmek: So was he wasn't insane.

Lilly: Oh…you…

Finally they pull in to Lier. Lilly hops out.

Lilly: Yeah, yeah, let's get this over with. *begins spell*

Tirmek: Without magic.

Lilly: :eek: Come on! It'll take me a month!

Tirmek: That's just the rules. Plus it's for your own good.

Lilly: It's not my fault that I transported stone from that dorm in Rekkenmark to repair the bridge.

Random Bystander: Hey, look everyone, it's that insane magician.

More Knowledgeble Bystander: Yeah. Now what was his name? Ted?

Lilly: Lo, people of Lier, it is I, your savior—*smack*

Trimek (holding newpaper): Guess this thing's usefull for more than just Sarah. Now get to work.

Angry Female Voice: TED ELRIC!

Lilly:……………c**p.

A tan woman with brown hair and pink fore-locks steps out of the crowd, holding a baby in her arms.

Lilly: Oh, *sweatdrop* hello Dandelion.

Dandelion: It's ironic that I've been trying to track you down for years, only to have you wander back into Lier. Now you can take responsibility for the mess you've caused me.

Lilly: The whole church thing? Well, yeah, it's all part of my sentence—

Dandelion: I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about him. (holds out the baby)

Lilly: :confused: What's that got to do w—:eek:

Tirmek: Wait, what's going on?

Silver and 13: *high-five*
rampant

04-06-07, 10:06 AM		Tirmek - Well Lets see Will Elina have you boiled alive or will she just throw you to Kanatash?
urial angel of death

04-06-07, 10:26 AM		Kerrith: Or she could make him jealous. :D

WHAM!
Charles Phipps

04-06-07, 10:39 AM		OOC: BTW, I believe my next post will win an award.

;-)
Charles Phipps

04-06-07, 10:45 AM		Before that shocking revelation

OOKaizer_Ryu: Oh God, you're not doing another attempt to parody 8bit are we?

OOCharles: :shifty: Maybe.

OOCKaizer_Ryu: We've done the attempt to parody 8bit like NINE times. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Usually not.

8-BIT TIRMEK AND LILLY

Tirmek: OH SWEET RAVANA! WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO US!

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/4/41/Redmage.PNG

Lilly: We're 8bit characters now.

http://www.adventchildren.net/ff7ac/media/fanart/ffviiac/013_cloudadventchillen_sm.jpg

Tirmek: I'm block like! MY GODS....

Lilly: Just go along with it.

Tirmek: Sweet Devourer, this is worse than when Saint Michael decided D&D was the devil.

Lilly: How the hell does a D&D character get off on deflaming HIMSELF?

Tirmek: Ex-blackguards are worse than you....almost.

Lilly: Didn't he film our weekend session with Kithle to prove that it was evil?

Tirmek: Yes but...

Lilly: ROLL CLIP!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XHdXG2gV01k&mode=related&search=

Tirmek: Thank you Lilly. You've officially made us dorks to the dorks watching it.

Lilly: Thanks.

Tirmek: So what are we looking for in this place?

Lilly: Roy told us to get the Armoir of Invincibility.

Tirmek: Oh CHR....YOU DO REALIZE THAT'S THE GAMER EQUIVALENT OF A SNIPE HUNT!?

Lilly: Snipe!? HOLY ****! WHERE!

Tirmek: Wha?

Lilly: Those things are like Challenge rating 17!

Tirmek: They don't exist!

Lilly: What? Oh thank god! My World of Warcraft Sister must have hunted them to extinction.

http://xav0rc.tripod.com/images/CFPaladin1.jpg

Tirmek: I hate your sister already.

Lilly: In any case, when we find the armoir we're fine.

Tirmek: Listen, jackass, there's no Armoir. All we do is wander around until a giant attacks u...

http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/DrillKnight.jpg

Tirmek: WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!? It's that to scale!?

Lilly: It's sixteen bit!

Kithle: RUN!

http://www.game-revolution.com/articles/8bit/8bit_thief.gif

Tirmek: When did you get here!?

Kithle: I was picking your pocket!

Tirmek: I thought we agreed never to work again after the last incident.

Kithle: Yes....

http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/Nextwave-AgentsofHATE11-017-018.jpg

Tirmek: Yes, let us never speak of it again.

Kithle: We can get away before it starts swinging that huge fist...

Lilly: Darkness beyond twilight, crimson beyond blood that flows....

Kithle: Oh crap.

Lilly: HADDOKKKEEENNNNNNNNNNN!

http://www.freewebs.com/makin-isreal/mushroom_cloud.jpeg

*The three flew through the air*

Tirmek: Lilly is serving as Fighter AND Black Mage. There's something wrong with that.

Kithle: Not really, what is a paladin except a complete psychopath?

Tirmek: Touche.

Lilly: How are we getting out of this...

Kithle: Commercial break....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-qJMxj-BxA4

Lilly: Whew, glad we landed in that nest of feather fall spells. Odd, I seem to have landed with a knife in my head.

Tirmek: I've at least kept the best part of being Black Mage.

Ash: I have a contract to be Black Mage. I'm so going to sue you all for this.
DragoonDarkfire

04-06-07, 11:01 AM		We see Marik, Buckrill and Yeth riding inside Optamis through a huge jungle.

Marik: So how much longer until we get to this "Huge freaking stash of Dragonshard"?

Yeth: Master. The coordinates read that we are 6.75 kilometers away at this approximate moment.

Marik: Good girl.

Marik pats Yeth's head.

Buckrill: what the hell happened to her?

Marik: I used the good 'ol fashion "Domination" power to increase her intelligence by using a Headband of Sexy Intelligence I got from Ketler.

Buckrill: a Headband of WHAT Intelligence?

Marik: Well ya see it makes her smart but-

Yeth suddenly appears wearing a lab coat that is unbuttoned down to her breasts.

Marik: See?

Buckrill: Sometimes I wish I hadn't taken up that offer with Wizards.
_______________________________

We see Buckrill in front of Gary Gygax

Gary: Alright. With Dungeons and Dragons version 3.5 out. We need a new campaign setting to give something to the new generation of Role Players. Currently we are struggling between Mr. Bakers idea, and yours.

Buckrill: Well. My campaign revolves around THIS HUGE MAGICAL WAR. It's four years after it, but much of the pain/suffering and hardships live on. Many ancient and unknown threats come about to threaten the people of this world. Including a continent of mystery, a continent of DRAGONS, and finally a continent controlled by evil outsiders that control peoples nightmares.

Gary: I LIKE IT! IT'S NEW! IT'S FRESH!... but since "Buckrill" is kinda a hick name we'll just put Keith's name on the front and say it was his idea.

Buckrill: oh f*** you.
_________________________

The truck comes to a sudden stop.

Marik: what the hell was that?

Yeth: Master. There appears to be an anomaly of magical energies... most illogical.

Marik: I think I liked you better when you were sweet and sexy.

They get out as Optamis transforms back into his human shape. They find themselves outside a huge building with a sign on the front of it.

Optamis: What does that sign say?

Yeth: It appears to be a form of ancient Giant tongue... most illogical master.

Marik pulls off headband.

Yeth: Master. I like chocolate master.

Marik: Yes you do.

Buckrill: Using my special dirge singer powers I can unlock this message.

Buckrill pulls out a guitar and starts playing "Woman" by Wolf Mother

Buckrill: alright. It says "Dragonmark For sale. 7 GP for least, 13 GP for lesser, 35 GP for greater and 100 GP for Siberys. Must be at least 15th level for Siberys mark.

Marik: ... what?

They go inside to see a Drow sitting at the front desk.

Drow: Hello. Welcome to my store. I sell Dragonmark, you buy yes?

Marik: This doesn't make any sense. Dragonmarks are apart of the prophecy right?

Drow: Yes. But since prophecy get destroyed. NOW ANYONE CAN HAVE DRAGONMARK!

Marik: AWESOME! I'll take one!

Buckrill: Marik... don't you think it might be a bad idea to infuse your body with ancient magical energies?

Marik: Pfft. What could happen?
____________________

Marik is lying down on a table surrounded by machinery.

Marik: alright so what mark can I get? Sentinel? Making? Finding?

Drow: any you want. Even make your own.

Marik: I'll take... THE MARK OF TIME!

Drow: Alright. Time it is.

The machinery seems to come to life with energy.

Marik: so is this going to hurt?

Drow: For me? No. For you? That depends when you pass out.

Marik: ... wha-
__________________

Back at the FF. We see Ketler working on a device when he stops.

Small tiny voice in the distance:AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH H!!!!!

Ketler: what the fury was that?
Charles Phipps

04-06-07, 11:04 AM		OOC:

I like Buckrill already.

;-)

Classic scene with Gygax.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-06-07, 03:58 PM		Lilly: (i.h.h. Thinkthinkthinkthinkthink……………:lightbulb ) The kid can't be mine!

Dandelion: Oh, I'm quite sure it's yours.

Lilly: But don't you see? It's been defined as a "baby", which means it's younger than 6 or 7 years since I've seen you. Heck, I was 9 at the time, I woudln't have been able.

Dandelion: I distinctly remember that part, too.

Tirmek: Hold on. As much as I loath helping Lilly………well, I like Elina and I'm dating her sister, he does have a point. Both he and the baby are too young.

Dandelion: It's the elf blood.

Tirmek: Elf blood? You mean the half-elf part?

Lilly (being ignored): I'm not that much elf. I mean, look at Legolas.

Dandelion: When the Valenar took over they came through all the towns. Some of them are actually really nice people. I was talking about the baby, and one of them mentioned that some half-elves get a bit more of the elvan slow maturation genes.

Tirmek: Races of the Wild redefined adulthood for elves as 25.

Lilly (still being ignored): And even then I'm only 15.

Dandelion: We got bypassed by the reverse continuity.

Tirmek: Oh.………Can't argue with any of the other points, being a half-breed myself. And then you should see my family…

Lilly: Really, the baby's not mine.

Tirmek: …I feel sorry for the little guy, seeing what family he's now in and who his father is—Hold on, how old does that make Lilly?

Lilly: *anime sweat as suddenly a whole lot of scrutinizing faces are upon him*

OOC: Hope this idea isn't weirding anyone out like the last time I had a kid that was a surprise.
Charles Phipps

04-06-07, 04:28 PM		OOC: No, this is cool.

I'm quite sure its Lilly's too.

Lilly: traitor!
rampant

04-06-07, 04:36 PM		Tirmek - But who in their right minds would ... with lily.

Lily - Elina

Tirmek - As she said she's in no danger of bearing your child. I figure she keeps you around as eye-candy. I'm really hoping she finds someone else before she decides to have kids.

Lily - I get no respect.
Charles Phipps

04-06-07, 04:44 PM		Dandelion: Besides, Lilly paid gold.

Tirmek: Wha?
rampant

04-06-07, 04:56 PM		Tirmek - You do realize the only reason I'm not dragging you through a salt flat right now is because Elina gets first dibs right.

Lily - HELP ME!
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-06-07, 05:19 PM		Dandelion: Besides, Lilly paid gold.
Lilly: I keep telling you, it wasn't me! Look, I'd lose all my paladin abilities if I lied. There'd be this big lightening bolt that would come down a grey me all out.

Tirmek: Aren't you a Paladin of Freedom? CG, and you can lie?

Lilly: Shutupshutupshutup!
Kaizer_Ryu

04-06-07, 07:11 PM		OOC: Funny stuff with Lilly, guys. Loved the Gygax scene, too.

IC:

*POOF*

Elina: Dammit! Not again! *un-fluffs her tail*

Sarah: It's been doing that since Lilly and Tirmek left on the community service or whatever. Separation anxiety?

Elina: I don't think so. I'm pretty sure Lilly's done something I won't like. Again.

Sarah: So it's like the 'thing' all parents have?

Six Years Ago

Elina: It's freezing in here! I'm gonna turn the heat up.

Lisa: Sweetie, you know how Terra feels about that.

Elina: C'mon, Momma. She won't even notice.

*turns the dial on the thermostat one micron*

Terra: *bursts in* Whoturneduptheheat?

Sarah: GAH!

Elina: Mom! It's cold in here!

Rose: *from the hall* Hey, Terra, you ok? My thing went off.

Terra: Nah, false alarm.

Jarlot: *over the speaker* Is everything all right? My thing's going off.

Serene: *telepathically* What's happening? My thing just went off.

Aerith: *through the wall* My thing went off. You ok?

Caralot: *poking her head in* Hey, my thing went off. What's going on?

Terrek: *warps in* I think my thing went off. Everything under control?

End Flashback

Sarah: That was a weird night.

OOC: See http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tV0TDz0c5qs for the inspiration.
ratslinky

04-06-07, 09:02 PM		A flaming star shot threw the sky of Lammania and came to rest in the heart of the Orkaru forest. Quensetath the unseen the greatest hunter of the forest watched from from behind a tree as the start came to rest in a clearing from behind the tree he was not more than 20ft away but he had no fear of being seen. Quensetath was a Wererat and one of the greatest hunters in the forest. During the Lycanthrope purge he had been an assassin seeking out great flame paladins out slaying them but when the tide turned against the Lycanthropes he fled to Lammania and become a hunter. On this night he felt a particularly strong longing to be back in the purge once again killing paladins he remembered the taste of their blood the noise their neck made when he came up behind them and broke it but most of all he remembered the looks on their faces when they realized that they where dieing. The flames on the shooting star died and Quensetath went closer to see if there was any valuable metals on the piece of rock. What he found was much more disturbing.

Telmar the druid walked threw the forest hoping to find that shooting star before anyone else he hoped to find some new as yet undiscovered substance so that he could present it to the rest of the druids at their next meeting. Wrapped in his thought Telmar almost walked by the place where the star had landed but he noticed just in time. He also noticed something much more disturbing in an area at least 50ft around the crater the land was blighted the trees where withered and the flower turning to dust. As he stood agape the blight moved it expanded to 60ft and then quickly to 70. Telmar had seen blight before but never had it had such a fast effect on the flora and never had it been so fast spreading. As he turning his head he noticed a pair of gleaming red eyes and then heard the voice.

The Voice: Bring him to me

*The eyes became lifted and there standing in the moonlight was Quensetath with an arrow pointed straight at Telmar*

Quensetath: Move *Quensetath motion towards the center of the blight*

*Telmar moved slowly towards the middle of the crater he got to the center and what he saw horrified him there on the ground was no meteor but a bloodied demon leg it was strange he thought that such a small thing was frightening him so much. But his train of thought was interrupted when something rose out of the leg and something so quite that only he could here it. His scream was heard for miles around and the he dropped to the ground and his last thought was of that thing that killed him.*

*And this is what it was http://bani.anime.net/o_rly.jpg
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-06-07, 09:04 PM		…[the 'thing' thing]…
Elina: So that was invented by 13, right?

13: Actually, no, that was Silver.

Sarah: Why her?

Bunny: She thought it would tell male humanoids when their women were going into heat.

*Pause*

Sarah: Isn't the FX demon supposed to come on with a badum-ching?

Bunny: No, that's what she really designed it for.

Sarah: Yeah, but isn't it still a joke?

13: This was before Silver realized males are dumb.
rampant

04-07-07, 01:41 AM		Elina - That is just too cute.

Sarah - I know thats why I brought the imaging crystals.

Tirmek and Xiath are both napping in a patch of sunlight, someone *coughsarahcough* has placed a ball between them. As one exhales it rolls towards the other who then exhales back, and so it goes the ball caught in perfect balance.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-07-07, 03:11 AM		13: This was before Silver realized males are dumb.
OOKaizer: That's not entirely fair. Not all of us are dumb.

13: :bored:

OOKaizer: We're just oblivious.

13: ...can't really argue with that one.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-07-07, 09:47 AM		Tirmek, Lilly, and Dandelion are standing around waiting for something.

Lilly: Slow posting day.

Tirmek: Well, even the E.B.N.E. who's writing this right now can't think of anything.

OOcat: :lightbulb Places on the set!

13: Rolling.

Tirmek: Right now the question is exactly how Elina is going to kill you.

Dandelion: :mad: If he's dead who's going to pay child support?

Random Bystander: Hey, are you going to be rebuilding our church or not?

Tirmek: Oh, yeah. Lilly, get to it, I'll make arrangements.

Lilly walks off to find the church is pretty much a pile of rubble.

Lilly: :eek: What? I didn't do this.

Guy from the drink stand: Oh yes you did, I remember: I invited you and that armored guy you were with over for a couple a' joints after you showed up that priest. You got really wasted and started spouting off something about how religion was bad for us and how you were going to save us from ourselves. Demolished the whole thing with one burp. :weep: Best wasted moment ever.

Lilly: (i.h.h. I wonder why Ivy never told me about this?)

Guy from the drink stand: Come to think of it, you invited some chicks over. That's probably how—

Lilly: The baby's not mine!

OOC: In case you don't know who all these characters are, go to youtube.com and look up "Metaless Alchemist".
rampant

04-07-07, 11:39 AM		Sarah - Ok people Its Semi-final day for us.

Tirmek - Five more minutes dear. :zzz:

Elina - Why is he napping now?

Sithis - Its how he deals with stress.

Elina - Sleeping?

Sarah - Acting like a cat.

Elina - That must have been interesting at finals.

Sarah - :angelhide:

Sithis - Anyway time to go.
Charles Phipps

04-07-07, 12:26 PM		Lilly: Ivy, you were here too!

Ivy: Yes, I recall you really got toasted on the wine fountain.

Lilly: etu brother?

Ivy: step up to your responsibilities like a man!

Dandelion: wait, you were there too....

Ivy: gah!

Dandelion: after your brother was finished, you said you wanted to try it at least once while you pined for a kittyman....

Lilly: Ah yes, once more all things come back to Tirmek.
DragoonDarkfire

04-07-07, 12:26 PM		Marik wakes up surrounded by Buckrill, Optamis, Yeth and the drow.

Marik: what happened?

Buckrill: you passed out after getting pumped with prophetic energy.

Marik: Oh.

Drow: Good news is. Dragonmark was a success.

Marik looks down to see he's shirtless and there's a dragonmark on his right peck.

Marik: WOA AWESOME!

Buckrill: So is this a true dragonmark?

Drow: Yes. It given through blood, strange boys children will have them and so will his children.

Buckrill: Great. If people learn about this then the economy of Khorvaire is literally screwed up the ass.

Marik: He's right. I can't risk this getting found out. Yeth, kill this guy.

Yeth: WHAT!? WHY WOULD I-

Marik pulls out remote control and presses a button. Yeth's eyes gloss over.

Yeth: Yes. Master.

Yeth turns to the drow and holds up her arms.

Drow: BAH! I warn you, I have dragonmark of DEATH! It's Siberys mark an-

Yeth takes off her shirt.

Drow: ... oh HELLO-

Marik whacks the drow over the head with a stick. He falls unconscious and bleeding.

Marik: Buckrill you owe me five Galifares.

Buckrill: I hate you so much.

They leave the drows dragonmark shop.

Buckrill: So now you have the dragonmark of time?

Marik: Yup... let me test this bugger out.

Marik starts to concentrate when another Marik suddenly appears next to him and then a second later the first Marik disappears.

Marik: Well?

Buckrill: ... you went back in time a second.

Marik: A SECOND!?

Optamis: Well it is only a least mark.

Marik: HOST DAMMIT!

Yeth: Master. Would you be happy if I were to pleasure you?

Marik: Yes I would. But first I need to go take my anger out on some Red-Shirts.
_________________________

Making Dragonmarks

1) You cannot have the Siberys Mark of Death.

2) Even if you are an elf.

3) If you do you'll become the center of everyones hit list.

4) and by "Hit List" we mean "Assasin List".

5) There is no mark of Pedophile.

6) Even if there was, you couldn't have it.

7) This is directed at YOU Ketler.

8) There isn't a mark of Whoop Ass either.

9) Even if there was it would be an abberant mark.

10) meaning you would be hunted or killed by the dragonmark houses.

11) Or worse.

12) By "worse" we mean the FF.

13) By "FF" we don't mean Final Fantasy.

14) The mark of Sentinel *DOES* offer protection.

15) But not protection in THAT manner.

16) A halfling Ninja with the Mark of Healing is not Doctor Mc.Ninja.

17) Even if he does have a gorilla for a secretary.

18) And rides a raptor.

19) Dragonmarks never harm, only heal.

20) The mark of death is the only exception.

21) You'd think that something called "Mark of Death" would be considered a bad omen from the Get-go actually...
Kaizer_Ryu

04-07-07, 12:42 PM		OOKaizer: You know he was yanking your chain about the Syberis Mark of Death, right?

Marik: The what now?

-----

Sarah: *achoo*

-----

OOKaizer: The drow guy was threatening you with it?

Marik: Oh, I wasn't listening to him.

OOKaizer: Then...you didn't have him killed in self-defense?

Marik: Self-defense? Hell no! That's for pansies and people without enough killing in their diet.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-07-07, 01:02 PM		Dandelion: after your brother was finished, you said you wanted to try it at least once while you pined for a kittyman....

Lilly: Ah yes, once more all things come back to Tirmek.
Ivy: But we didn't know Tirmek then.

Lilly: So what kittyman were you pining for?

Ivy: How should I know?

Lilly: Interesting thing, I remember Roy and I took you to that gay club, and you were freaked.

Ivy: Why did you do that?

Lilly: I wanted to make you gay.

Ivy: You can't make people gay!

Lilly: Mother, if gays can be cured then they can be made.

Ivy: Where'd you get a Minotaur-sh*t idea like that?

Lilly: The Flamer Weekly.

Ivy: Stop reading that intolerant drivel.

Dandelion (scrutinizing Ivy closely): You were really trapped in the suit of armor?

Ivy: Yes. Which is why I'm very confused that you say I "wanted to try it".

Dandelion: It's just that you look familiar……

OOC: It was funny, Charles, but things are getting inconsistant.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-07-07, 01:29 PM		OOC: It was funny, Charles, but things are getting inconsistant.
OOC: Not really. Remember, Ivy was trapped in the armor after a certain "incident". He could have been just fine when they visited Lier.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-07-07, 01:41 PM		OOC: Not really. Remember, Ivy was trapped in the armor after a certain "incident". He could have been just fine when they visited Lier.
OOC: I meant the suggestion that they knew Tirmek. Everything else is flexible.
Charles Phipps

04-07-07, 02:08 PM		OOC: I meant the suggestion that they knew Tirmek. Everything else is flexible.

Ivy: I was born on a time travelling airship.

Lilly: To the Devil.

Ivy: The idea that there's anything consistent about our lives should be called into serious question.

Lilly: In any case, isn't this place supposed to be destroyed.

Spar: no, they rebuilt it.

Lilly: Gah! You!
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-07-07, 03:09 PM		Lilly: In any case, isn't this place supposed to be destroyed.

Spar: No, they rebuilt it.
Lilly: Then why didn't they rebuild the church?

Random Line-sayer: Because…………it's haunted!

FX demon: *spooky noise*

Lilly (going over to the pile of rubble): Come on, how bad could it be?

Universe: *whirrrrrrr* SCREWED CLAUSE ACTIVATED.

Lilly: Screwed clause?

13: Whenever the comic relief says "How bad could it be?" it automatically activates something really bad.

Rubble: (becomes a giant animated object) RRRAAAAARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!

Lilly: :bored:
rampant

04-07-07, 03:13 PM		Lily - This is why a good paladin brings along a trusty mage-type person Tirmek null this walking junkyard back the neo-lithic age.
...

Lily - Thats right Tirmek hates me.

Tirmek - *sipping an ice tea* yep
Charles Phipps

04-07-07, 03:23 PM		Lilly: I forget, I'm a caster and paladin. What are you now again Tirmek?

Tirmek: Of a superior species.
rampant

04-07-07, 03:39 PM		Tirmek - Also I'm having a lot of fun.

Lily - Huh?

*WHAM*

Tirmek - Keep your eye on the monster Lily.
DragoonDarkfire

04-07-07, 04:32 PM		We see the Lord of Blades on top of Scorpinoc running through a forest with two other Deceptiforged at his side.

JetLyndara: Megatron. What are we doing? This place is a blasted land.

LOB: True. But let's not forget. There's Energon here.

Firespike: Heh. I remember the first time we came to this miserable place from Cybertron.
______________________

We see LOB walking into the Mournland with a group of Deceptiforged behind him

LOB: Hmmm... a Wasteland of battle and death... The perfect place to set up our base of operations. Yes. No one will dare intrude on us here.

We see a Raptor move his way through the Deceptiforged up to LOB.

Dino'Forged: What are we DOING here? We should be out destroying those pathetic Autoforged and getting ENERGON!

LOB: Patience Dino'Forged. We'll be able to do all of that once we are able to set up our base of operations.

Dino'Forged moves in front of LOB

Dino'Forged: NO! I'm tried of listening to your orders. WE SHALL FIGHT TO-

LOB grabs Dino'Forged by the throat and lifts him up into the air.

LOB: So it has come to this has it? Very well. Goodbye Dino'Forged.

LOB throws Dinoforged over the Mournland into some dead gray mists.
____________________________

JetLyndara: Hey whatever happened to that guy anyway?

Firespike: Beats me.
____________________________

We see Marik, Buckrill, Yeth and Optamis come to a huge bridge over a chasm

Marik: Looks like we gotta cross the bridge.

Buckrill: did you NEED to point that out.

Yeth: I SENSE DANGER!

They turn to see a Raptor standing at the other side of the bridge.

Marik: A Raptor? Shouldn't you be in the Talenta Plains with a halfling on your back?

Dino'Forged: Don't remind me.

Dino'Forged reaches behind himself and pulls a halfling off his back while throwing him over.

Marik: HE TALKED!

Optamis: That's no Raptor... THAT'S A-

Dino'Forged: Optamis Prime... it's a pleasure to meet. I am Dino'Forged. A Deceptiforged. Unfortunately I have gotten on the LoB bad side.

Marik: What were you stupid enough to challenge him for leadership honorably? Seriously who the hell does that?

Dino'Forged: Hey shutup. Anywho. I CHALLENGE YOU OPTAMIS PRIME! FOR CONTROL OF THE AUTOFORGED!

He transforms from his Raptor form to his humanoid form.

Marik: Ya want me to...

Marik holds up boomerang

Optamis: NO! I'll handle this. I don't want to fight you Dino'Forged, you're free to join us but not as leader.

Dino'Forged: Then I am sure you will be MISSED!

They charge eachother.

OCCDragoon: we didn't get any jokes in this time x_x

Marik: Maybe if you wouldn't ripp off BEAST WARS
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-07-07, 04:52 PM		"TRANSFORMERS! Toy commercial in disguise!"
rampant

04-07-07, 05:55 PM		Elina - I got Bezen.

Tirmek - Phew!

Elina - What are you happy about?

Tirmek - What do you know about sealing Immortals?

Elina - It contains them within a vessel and severly limits their ability to act. First developed by early Dwarves to deal with the constant influx of powerful outsiders near the frostfell. The best vessels are strong willed humanoids, who can suppress the sealed spirit and even gain some control over its power. Why? Is Bezen a Sealer?

Sarah - Hardly He's a vessel.

Elina - When did that happen?

Sarah - 'Bout his third birthday, says its his first memory.

Elina - Well that doesn't make sense why would anyone seal a spirit in a toddler? It takes years for a vessel to be trained.

Tirmek - To make sure the Immortal would be in control.

Elina - Thats wrong.

Tirmek - Project Avatar, studies of several vessels had shown that with time a sealed immortal and its vessel became more than the sum of these parts. Several trials were run ranging from traditional sealings such as mid level elemental spirits, to sealing imps into powerful psions. Traditionally the most stable sealings are those where one is significantly stronger, but not overwhelmingly so. Conversely it was found that the growth potencial increased as the difference in starting power of the pair increased. Bezen is a full angel and its entire oversoul bound to a shifter toddler. Another attempt to create super-soldiers, Bezen proved too unstable and got shipped here. Unphased by this set back Karnnathi dwarves have refined the process and sealed soldiers are a common sight in that area, though none are known to have anything quite the same level as Bezen's Vorashis stuck in them.

Sarah - Thats not so bad I got Vedris.

Tirmek - Ouch! Half-Nymph Half-Xen'drik Elf, Don't let her elf side fool you she takes after her mum. Try to avoid fighting her in water.

Elina - I've got her in my blade-weaving classes, she's a fey-warlock/soulknife. She's near impossible to hit.

Sithis - I know, good luckwith that, OH FUG!

Tirmek - I dodged another bullet.

Sithis - Not Sagas, he's as arrogant as Tirmek, but you can't imagine him playing with a ball of string when you're pretending to pay attencion.

Tirmek - That leaves Tellowas for me.

Sarah - :drool: must get recording crystal

Sithis - ???

Elina - Catboy fight.
rampant

04-07-07, 07:42 PM		Upon entering the arena for her match Sarah had only one thought.

Sarah - Someone has been playing way too much FFX.

For lo and behold the arena is a giant floating ball of water, only unlike in a blitz ball match there is a maze of currents within and the surface has sveral chunks of rock jutting out. This model comes equipped with its own gravity feild making the center of the orb "down".

The half-nymph Vedris, a 6 foot tall girl with blue-blond hair and green eyes, is wearing a laquered suit of leather armor, and jeweled anklets, bracelets, and even a small tiara. She leaps into the water her fey heritage allows her to breathe andmove easily here.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-07-07, 08:15 PM		Sarah: Now if only he was here.

Tidus: I'm angsty and have daddy issues! I say things that rightly make me sound like a moron while hitting on a girl way out of my league! I'm a main character that uses support magic! The only character that had any redeeming qualitites in my game was Auron!

Sarah: YES!

*BLOODY MASSACRE*

Sarah: DAMMIT!

OOKaizer: *covered in gore* You're fighting against a hot half-fey. I get at least this much.
rampant

04-07-07, 09:00 PM		OOC: I always liked the support magic, not a big fan of Tidus, but why shouldn't the main character use support spells?
-------------------
Sarah - (i.h.h. If i stay on the islands she has to come out of the water to get me.) Wait a minute why is the ground moving?

While Sarah had tried to use the island as cover Vedris had been freezing the water beneath one half of the rock, pretty soon it was going to tip over.

SPLASH!

Sarah - (i.h.h. And now I'm underwater. Good thing I know this one.)

Webbing grows between Sarah's fingers and toes. Gill slits apear on her neck.

Vedris - Good to know its not going to be that easy. I'd hate for our first date tobe so short.

Sarah - (i.h.h. Is she flirting with me?)

Vedris - *launches an eldritch blast that Sarah dodges, but the shot bounces off the rock behind her and scatters, forming a cone of mindblades charged with eldritch power, seveeral of which find Sarah* Loser takes the winner out to dinner?

Sarah - (i.h.h. that answers that question)
Kaizer_Ryu

04-07-07, 09:40 PM		OOC: I always liked the support magic, not a big fan of Tidus, but why shouldn't the main character use support spells?OOC: Support magic is all well and good, but I prefer it to be something that means the difference between victory and defeat instead of a vicious beating (by the party) and uber pwnage to the face (by the party).

And I hate that Tidus can ONLY use support magic unless he moves to a different path. His only use 90% of the time is to take out the Lupin-class enemies and get on my nerves. He can't match Auron or Wakka for damage, and at least Khimari can learn worthwile skills before the last third of the game. He's a freaking MAIN CHARACTER! They have to be badass like Cloud!

Ok, maybe not THAT badass. Setting the bar that high is just begging for disappointment. :D

IC:

Sarah: Now wait just a- (i.h.h.) Hang on. This could be one of those "opportune moments" Uncle Jarlot keeps talking about. Think! What would Tirmek do?!

In Her Imagination

Tirmek: Oh, no. You're not getting free advice out of me during a test.

Back To Reality

Sarah: (i.h.h.: :mad: Ok, fine.) Tempting offer. You win, dinner. I win...you treat me to an activity of my choice.

Vedris: Deal.

Sarah: (i.h.h.: Let's see how this goes over.) ;)

Vedris: :mymy: :blush: (i.h.h.) No. Way. Did she just wink at me?
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-07-07, 09:44 PM		Sarah - (i.h.h. Is she flirting with me?)

Vedris - …… Loser takes the winner out to dinner?

Sarah - (i.h.h. that answers that question)
13 and Silver are having a mad glare at each other.

13: It's my job because it's annoying.

Silver: It's my job because it involves :love: .

Bunny: This happens more often then you think.
**********
Lilly now faces off against the animated church rubble.

Lilly: Okay, big, grey, and stupid, prepare to face the wrath of my Final Fantasy Ripoff Technique!

Fist: *THUMP*

Lilly (from under the fist): Good preperation.
**********
OOC: I think a main character who isn't automatically the best warrior of the bunch would be really cool.
rampant

04-07-07, 10:20 PM		OOC: I agree, Tidus was just lame independent of that though. Can anyone say Cloud's sissy younger brother.
-------------------------------------

Vedris - OOOH I'm so excited!

Sarah - (i.h.h. now!) RAAAAA!

Sarah's charge is cut off as a pillar of ice slams into her back.

Vedris has sent her eldritch blast along the current wich snaked around behind the young uber-thrope.

Vedris - I know the nicest little Eldeen place. I hope you like Curry.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-07-07, 10:39 PM		OOC: I think a main character who isn't automatically the best warrior of the bunch would be really cool.OOC: One word - Zidane.

At least he was cool. Tidus is just pathetic. Zidane was a frigging Thief, and still managed to be badass. For me, Badass =/= Uber. Badass = Cool.

See also - Cecil

Kain, Edge, and Yang outdo him in physical combat and Rosa makes him near useless in magic, but he's still badass.

Unfortunately, Vaan (FFXII) comes off too much like Whiny McWussypants for my tastes. Now Baltheir, THAT'S the kind of guy I want to be. :D

BTW, has anyone seen pictures of Tidus and (stoned) Meg Ryan side by side?

The resemblance is uncanny.

IC:

Sarah: (i.h.h.) Ok, she knows how to use the currents. Gotta pay attention to them, too. You've done that with shadowmatter all your life, this isn't new.

Before the eldrich blast hits, Sarah alters the currents with a barrier of shadowmatter, sending it flying upwards and out of the water. Eddys begin forming immediately, disrupting her movement.

Vedris: You're making this too easy, dear.

As she readies to hit Sarah with another barrage of ice, the currents go wild around her as well. Several small shadow barriers appear about her, causing the currents to beat her about as they form a mini-whirlpool.

Sarah: *dispells the barrier behind her* Ebb, flow, force, and pressure. Through water or shadow it makes no difference.
rampant

04-07-07, 10:51 PM		Vedris - *Invocation of the Stone Sea*

The water around Sarah grows denser altering the currents and restricting her movement. What's worse, The limit of the area is bound by a net of mindblade energy.

Forming a series of mindblade daggers Vedris charges each with a mixture of eldritch and psionic force.

Sarah - (i.h.h. even if I get out of this net she's got a wicked barrage ready, and this damned net is taking forever to dispell)
Kaizer_Ryu

04-07-07, 11:13 PM		Sarah: Dang, not bad. Field advantage, nice trap, and an unpleasant result should I go anywhere.

She shifts to shadow form and is pressed into a ball by the water pressure.

Sarah: Energy Burst

The blast of psionic energy causes her form to literally splatter in all directions. The tiny pieces of shadowmatter fly out past the barrier. The barrier reacts, but by the time it activates, the pieces are beyond it.

Vedris: :mymy: That...that was...

Sarah: *reforms* Icky? Weird? Wrong? Disturbing? I've heard 'em all.

Vedris: -so HOT! :drool:

Sarah: :uh-huh:
rampant

04-07-07, 11:27 PM		Vedris - (i.h.h. okay uber hotness aside, I need a new strategy) *Forms a length of chain in one hand and a long knife in the other*

The chain snakes through the water to Strike at Sarah, the wolf-girl uses an eddie to dodge, but the move brings her into the range of the long knife.

Sarah - EEP *dodge* phew RAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH

The long knife pulsed, and the charged daggers from earlier ripped forward Blasting Sarah ripping through her defenses and leaving blood in the water. The eddies from the attack trapped her long enough for the chain to grab hold. Vedris spun pulling Sarah toward her knife.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-08-07, 12:46 AM		Shifting to shadow form once more, Sarah allowed the chain pass through her. Shifting back, she twisted around to use the momentum from the pull to fuel the roundhouse. Vedris ducked, sending Sarah flying behind her. The Wolf-girl turned again and grabbed the mindblade chain that followed her, activating the lighting elemental function of her gloves to send a concentrated wave of electricity into the unfortuante Half-Nymph.

Sarah: :devil: Don't you just love Energy Adaptation?

Vedris: *singed* Ow. (i.h.h.) She's using strategy. Not a good sign.

Sarah: Two can play with knives, you know.

Shadow knives formed about Sarah before bombarding Vedris. She read the currents, dodging skillfully even as Sarah blocked her path and disrupted the flow.

Vedris: (i.h.h.) She's trying to drive me out of the water.

Infusing a simple Light spell, she hurled a mindblade at the shadow barrier that formed before her, trying to regain control of her destination and blowing a large hole in the barrier.

The barrier, however, merely became a ring. As Vedris passed through it, the shadowmatter ring quickly shrank, pinning her arms to her sides. Her ability to maneuver severely hampered, the shadow daggers caught up to her, leaving only pain and blood in their wake. A blow from behind sent her flying further away from the center, nearly breaking the surface before she freed herself.

Sarah: Drat.
rampant

04-08-07, 01:02 AM		Vedris - (i.h.h. then again, maybe i need to re-evaluate my choice of battle feilds)

Vedris invokes her power sprouting dragonfly wings made of golden-green light, and leaving the water.

Sarah - (i.h.h. she left on her own, ah **** this is gonna hurt)

Vedris stikes out with both hands her eldritch might twisting into a pillar of lightning, and a pillar of frost. The frost pillar hits the orb of water and spreads out freezing more and more of the water the forward edge is a wall of icy spears.

The lightning was aimed higher up it quickly courses through the entire liquid portion its power becoming more concentrated as the amount of liquid decreses. The sparks resemble daggers zipping through the water.

Sarah - Raaaaaaaaaaaaaa (i.h.h. This lightning hurts, but I gotta get going before i get frozen solid.)
Kaizer_Ryu

04-08-07, 01:30 AM		Vedris: Well that was boring.

Through the frozen sphere, Vedris can see Sarah about halfway out before being encased in ice.

Vedris: At least this means I get a crack at dragging her away from that smartass kit-

Sarah: *from the other side of the sphere* RRRRRAAAAAAAAA!!!!

A smash, a crack, and then an explosion of ice fragments. The shards of the shattered sphere ripped through Vedris, despite her efforts. Through the cloud of debris, she sees both the dissipating doppleganger and, further away, Sarah flying in mid strike.

Sarah: That was WAY too close. I give you props. Had I not already been defended against electricity AND naturally resistant to it, you might have won right there.

The ice had actually frozen the water in mid-splash, having reached her just as she exited the sphere. She had left a doppleganger, hoping Vedris would take the bait as she did.

Sarah: Let's go. Round 2.
rampant

04-08-07, 02:07 AM		Vedris - HU-AH!

Vedris brings her long knife out again. First a parry against Sarah's reaching claws. The next strike was short At leat until she extended the blade into a rapier and slashed Sarah's side. The third strike came from the same side. Vedris reversed her spin and brought her other hand around unleashing an eldritch blast of pure magical power into Sarah's gut. The final stike was the sword coming round from overhead, unleashing a burst of psychic force the cut was deep into Sarah's shoulder.

Vedris - You gotta do better than that, cute doesn't win fights.

Sarah - (i.h.h. ok this would be alot less wierd if she'd stop flirting with me)
Charles Phipps

04-08-07, 02:10 AM		IC:

OOC: I support FFX for Yuna, Rikku, and Black Mage Girl!

Lilly: Okay, this is definitely a difficult thing to kill.

Spar: You need to use the Futaynokowamee technique.

Lilly: The what?

Spar: Hit it alot!

Lilly: Good idea!

*Lilly threw Spar at the mountain of the church before it crumbled with the scarred man smashing through it*

*The gigantic stone collosus then collapses on a building behind it, killing everyone inside*

Lilly: VICTORY POSE!

Spar: My brain now all funny.

*Elina then arrives wearing a white blouse over her attire and her hammer being very prominent*

*she stands next to Lilly*

http://www.rpgfan.com/fanart/2002/08-24/garnettil-01.jpg

Elina: Oh God, did you hear....

Lilly: Elina! GAH!

Elina: Lilly, what are you doing here?

Lilly: Uhh....Fighting evil!

Elina: Oh Thank God, you can help find the people who slaughtered the Old Folks home just now!

Lilly: Dammit! I was going there next to find the bastarves who owed me money from last time.

Elina: Lilly!

Lilly: Sorry, but this is a rough neighborhood.

Elina: There's a Church, Rubble, and an orphanage.

Lilly: Young hooligans!

Elina: They helped the Old Folks every day by playing games with them and running errands.

Lilly: Not any more obviously...hehehehe.

Elina: Did you just laugh?

Lilly: Errr nothing.

Tirmek: Lilly has an illegitimate kid with a local *****.

Elina: Oh, you mean Dandelion and Spoony.

Lilly: Eh?

Elina: That's the kids name.

Lilly: OH GOD! IT IS MY KID!

Elina: Yeah, its cute. I can't wait to see what it'll be like.

Lilly: Huh?

Elina: We weren't dating when he was concieved. Plus, Aerith has agreed to help take care of it. Mom raised me to understand all life is precious.

Lilly: You're not mad.

Elina: Oh please....

WHAM
WHAM
WHAM
WHAM
WHAM

Elina: Not in the least. VICTORY POSE!

http://c-uncut.com/media/ff10-2-yuna4.jpg
Kaizer_Ryu

04-08-07, 03:10 AM		Sarah: And you need to do a better job at paying attention to your wounds!

With the last word, Sarah jammed her fingers into one of the more prominent lascerations from the ice fragments, causing Vedris to recoil in pain. Not much, but enough for Sarah to retaliate. The gauntlet to the jaw looked particularly painful.

*CRACK*

I think that was a rib.

*SMASH*

There goes the spleen.

*CRUNCH*

Is that even allowed?

*CHOMP*

With the last two attacks, Vedris had managed to do enough damage to overtax Sarah's regenerative abilities, not to mention hampering her mobility. The retaliatory strike left Vedris in much the same situation, except for being caught by the leg in Sarah's teeth. With Vedris in tow, Sarah dove for the ground, ignoring the burning pain in her own leg as Vedris stabbed her in an attempt to free herself. It was only when Vedris yanked on Sarah's wings and threw her off balance that she relented.

Instead of letting go completely, however, Sarah whipped around and grabbed the offending arm and pulled Vedris in front of her. Still in the divebomb, they reached the ground shortly.

Vedris took the full force of the impact as Sarah liquefied around her. Sarah slowly reformed after the rather painful blast of eldrich energy Vedris unleashed before they crashed.
rampant

04-08-07, 03:13 AM		Vedris - You ... are so ... beautiful. *goes unconcious*
Charles Phipps

04-08-07, 03:20 AM		Tirmek: Well, now that's resolved. Let's le....

Lilly: There's a posting for LIGHT WARRIORS needed by King Steve.

Tirmek: Oh Gods.

Lilly: OUR DESTINY AWAITS!
Kaizer_Ryu

04-08-07, 03:28 AM		Sarah: :D *VICTORY PO-* *faints*

Gaz: Dang. I didn't think she could do it.

Sithis: You know what this means?

Gaz: She...no longer depends on her rages to win battles? :angelhide

Sithis: AND?

Gaz: Um... :shifty:

Sithis: She won fair and square without going psycho-thrope. That's ten gold you owe me.

Gaz: Grrr. *forks it over*

OOC: That's it for me tonight. :zzz:
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-08-07, 10:19 AM		Vedris: :mymy: That...that was...

Sarah: *reforms* Icky? Weird? Wrong? Disturbing? I've heard 'em all.

Vedris: -so HOT! :drool:

Sarah: :uh-huh:
Silver: I'm glad we're cooperating on this.
Sarah - (i.h.h. ok this would be alot less wierd if she'd stop flirting with me)
13: But not as much fun.
**********
Lilly: Okay, that's it, I demand a paternity test.

Dandelion: A what?

Lilly: Oh, right, you live out here in Hickland—

Valenar (appearing with a scimitar pressed to Lilly's neck): What was that again?

Lilly: —this ancient and noble land that isn't quite caught up with modern advances due to the need to respect their traditions. (Valenar disappears) Anyway, I demand that this test of paternity be done in its most noble forum—

Dandelion: I guess that's fair.

Lilly: —a talk show!

Tirmek: :nonono:

Elina: Don't we have an 8-bit parody to do?

OOcat: This'll just take a second.

Kanatash: :D Somebody call for me?

OOcat: Sorry, but we're past the point of beating on people.
***********
Maivy: Today on Maivy we have Lilly Galan, who wants to find out if the baby of Dandelion Tomas isn't his.

Lilly: I just want this to be determined fairly.

Dandelion: That's a lot more mature than you were acting when I met you.

Lilly: I mean, the Dark Lords give bonus points if the baby you sacrifice is your own.

Audience: :uh-huh:

Maivy: To answer this question, we've turned to the testing services of the greatest genetic mind in the world.

Caralot: :D Hello.

Maivy: So, Dr. Caralot, what are the results?

Caralot: Lilly is…

FX demon: *sound of everyone on the edge of their seat*

Caralot: …not the father.

Lilly: :w00t:

Maivy: Dr. can you be sure?

Caralot: The testing was a little tricky, as the baby appears to be approximately half unpahsed with regards to matter and energy on our current plane.

Everyone else: :confused:

Kanatash: She means the father was a manifested incorporeal, likely a ghost.

Caralot: The baby also contains the Khyber gene, but fortunately is not a carrier of the Spoony gene.

Lilly looks at Dandelion funny.

Lilly: You're not going to turn into a five-headed dragn, are you?

Caralot: The composition of the father's contribution indicates that the individual in question would have a 75% genetic similarity to Lilly.

Maivy: For those of us who still live in an early renaissance-level world.

Caralot: The father is a sibling of Lilly's.

Lilly: A sibling of mine who was a disembodied entity at the time—:eek:
**********
Ivy is sitting down to lunch with today's edition of The Daily Bastard. He turns to page 13.

Ivy: Horrorscopes. Let's see……"Lendys: A mistake of youthful fear will come back to haunt you." I see they're going with the vague now. That's no fun. "Be prepared for two people to move into your home. If you need any assitance feel free to ask your brother, as he will be happy to be off the hook." That's………rather spooky. "Turn on your crystal ball if you want to find out more."……………………Ooookaaaaaaayyyyy. (turns on the widescreen crystal ball)

Lilly: Ivy's the father?!

Ivy:…………………Friggin' Mom.

OOC: Yes, I planned it this way from the beginning.
rampant

04-08-07, 10:26 AM		Ivy - This is going to be akward.

Hyrd is still in the bed.

Hyrd - Huh? Ivy come back to bed, Hyrd want Ivy so bad.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-08-07, 12:24 PM		Dandelion: Hello. (begins measuring for drapes)

Ivy: GAH! How'd you get here so fast?

Dandelion: That show was recorded 24 hours ago.

Ivy: Then why the freak didn't anyone tell me?

Dandelion: Wait, Lilly still isn't back yet from partying?
**********
Lilly is drinkin' it up with the Guy From The Drink Stand.

Lilly: No, no, really man, watch this—*BARP!*

Unlimited destruction ensues.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-08-07, 12:25 PM		Ivy - This is going to be akward.
13: Do I do this any other way?
Charles Phipps

04-08-07, 12:30 PM		Awwww what a sweet ending.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-08-07, 12:33 PM		Awwww what a sweet ending.
OOC: I think Ivy deserves a bit more use.
DragoonDarkfire

04-08-07, 01:20 PM		we see Optamis and Dino'Forged fighting over a bridge

Marik: YEA GO OPTAMIS! WE'RE WITH YOU ALL THE WAY!

Buckrill: Five dragons says he wins.

Marik: You're on.

A few miles away, LoB, Scorpinoc, JetLyndara and Firespike come to a stop to see Optamis and Dino'Forged fighting.

LOB: Optamis prime and Dino'Forged... fighting?

Firespike: I'd personally like it if they BOTH lost.

LOB: That can be... arranged.

Optamis knocks Dino'Forged prone.

Dino'Forged: I have lost... you may finish me off.

Marik: AWWW COME ON! DON'T BE SUCH A WUSS!

Optamis: That's not how we do things around here.

Dino'Forged knocks Optamis down

Dino'Forged: THEN THAT IS A SHAME!

Marik: WOOO!!! GO DINO-

The scene suddenly stops when LOB and his Deceptiforged can be seen aiming weapons at the bridge.

Optamis: MEGATRON!

LOB: DECEPTIFORGED! OPEN FIRE!

Buckrill: EVERYONE ACROSS THE BRIDGE!

Marik, Buckrill and Yeth start to run across the bridge.

Optamis: COME ON DINO'FORGED!

Dino'Forged reluctantly pulls up Optamis and the two run across the bridge as well.

The bridge is hit by multiple fireballs and it explodes.

Marik: THAT WAS CLOSE!

Yeth: Indeed master. We might have lost someone important.

We see Buckrill at the bottom of a pile of rubble.

Buckrill: I HATE YOU ALL!
Kaizer_Ryu

04-08-07, 01:23 PM		Vedris: Well, gorgeous, what is it you want to do?

Sarah: Well...um... *anime sweatdrop*

Vedris: What's wrong? That was our deal.

Sarah: Look, Vedris, you're really pretty and all, and I'm flattered you like me so much, but...

Vedris: :mad: I knew it.

Sarah: I just don't feel like that about you! Besides, you've been nasty to Tirmek.

Vedris: :( That was *sniff* because I *sniff* was jealous... *sniff* :weep:

Sarah: *hug* Hey, hey. Don't take it so hard. You'll find someone else who feels the same w-

Vedris: *GLOMPH*

*SMACK*

Sarah: :mad: :blush:

Vedris: *on the ground with a black eye* That was so totally worth it. :D

Sarah: Just for that, I'm taking Tirmek out somewhere expensive on your silver piece. As I remember, you treat me to one activity of my choice if I won was the deal.

Vedris: :(
urial angel of death

04-08-07, 02:32 PM		Back at Mythos Park

Kerrith: Say Rose what would happen if the magic signs turned off.

Rose: Well then all the creatures would get loose and rampage through the Park. Why do you ask?

Kerrith: They just went out.

Rose: :eek:

Sarah: Hey the car stopped.

Rose: You have to be joking!

Sarah: Nope completely stopped.

Rose: How can things get any worse?

Kerrith: Look up.

As Rose slowwly cranes his neck upward he, through the sunroof he sees the now freed Star Spawn. Rose leaps out of the car and dashs across the road to a waiting tree-line.

Kerrith: He left :eek:
rampant

04-08-07, 06:28 PM		Bezen enters the Arena, the field has been laeft as it was at the end of the fight between Vedris and Sarah. Bezen is wearing patchwork armor made of a dozen different materials, and apparently scavenged from at least as many suits. His wild brown hair and feral grin complete the trained-but-not-tamed look.

Bezen leaps ontothe orb of ice and lets loose a roar of challenge.

Elina - Bugger
Charles Phipps

04-08-07, 07:13 PM		OOC: I love Mythos Park.

Now back to our 8-bit FMA parody!

IC:

Tirmek: Why would we help King Steve?

Lilly: It's simple. IT'S OUR DESTINY!

Tirmek: I doubt we're Light Warriors Lilly.

Lilly: Who else but us could be the god blooded champions of good?

***

Elsewhere

Terra: Where the Hell are we?

Motoko: Rose had the map.

Rose: I thought YOU had the map.

Jarlot: Okay, let's go back to where we started this quest from...

***

Tirmek: There's also a need for four champions. We're only three if you count Elina.

Lilly: We'll just have to recruit someone.

Cloud: Yo!

*Tirmek shoots Cloud in the face with a crossbow*

Tirmek: Is he dead?

Lilly: I think the poison did it...or the +9 bolt of Cloud Slaying.

Tirmek: Okay, this could be fun. As long as I get to be a complete ass about these tryouts. However, you have to pass my trials.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=leNtV8dduWo

Lilly: Oh God...

Tirmek: I think you need to lose some weight before we let you on this team Ted.

Lilly: LILLY!
rampant

04-08-07, 07:21 PM		Bezen zips in close trying to end the fight fast. His claws extend, his wings sprout out of his back, and his hide hardens noticeably. Using his wings to get a boost He charges right for Elina, claws aimed at her knees.
Charles Phipps

04-08-07, 07:32 PM		FYI---If it wasn't obvious, the fight and 8bit parody are taking place at seperate times.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-08-07, 07:37 PM		trained-but-not-tamed look.OOC: Soooooooo...Sarah during a full moon? :D

IC:

EDIT: Crap, rampant posted first. Just assume this happens before Bezen attacks.

Elina: A shattered ball of ice as our arena. This could get interesting...

In sharp contrast to Bezen's wild and somewhat unrefined entrance, Elina's graceful flight up and soft landing at the starting position belied a combination of apprehension at a challenger even Sarah deemed formidable and the only somewhat comforting knowledge that berzerking was not a trump card.

Bezen: A guardian of the Light versus one of the Darkness.

Elina: I was once of the Darkness. It nearly consumed me.

Bezen: So which path do you take? That of the Light, or the Dark?

Elina: Neither. I take the path to Twilight.

Bezen: The middle path that leads to Midnight?

Elina: No. I'm taking the path that leads to Dawn.

Both turn and stare at a certain Entity.

Elina: There, we did the :censored: ing scene.

Bezen: :mad: Happy now?

OOKaizer: *GLEE*

Elina: Honestly, I am going to beat you senseless if you make me ride a Gummy Ship at any point in time.

OOKaizer: But the Gummy levels in the second Kingdom Hearts ROCKED!

Elina: Gaz, if you would.

Gaz: :evillaugh Do doo do-do do...

OOKaizer: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! GET IT AWAY!
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-08-07, 08:00 PM		Bezen: So which path do you take? That of the Light, or the Dark?

Elina: Neither. I take the path to Twilight.
OOcat: ……You can already change into a wolf.

FX demon: :rimshot:
urial angel of death

04-08-07, 08:10 PM		Nalfien: Why is my entity not doing my story-line.

OOUrial: He has more important things to do.

Nalfien: What could possibly be more important than me. :bigeyes:

OOUrial: His new girlfriend.

Nalfien: :uh-huh: My entity has a girlfriend?

Kerrith: Any entity has a girlfriend?

OOUrial: Shut up mister third-wheel.

Kerrith: :allalone:

OOUrial: Yes OORei has a girldfriend.

Nalfien: :surrender

Other entities: :clap:
Charles Phipps

04-08-07, 08:16 PM		Five hours later

Tirmek: Uh huh and your qualifications are....

Magus: I'm a sorcerer king of godlike power.

Tirmek: From Chrono Crusade I understand?

Magus: CHRONO TRIGGER! CHRONO CROSS! Chrono Crusade is an anime that ripped off our name starring a girl who like Excell.

Tirmek: I'm sorry, I think you're powers are just too ordinary.

Magus: The hell!? I'll cast you to the Nine Hells for this!

Tirmek: Next!

*Lilly, in a fake mustache and a green outfit with an L on his hat, walks up*

Lilly: Ello, I am Lilluji! Lilly's twin brother!

Tirmek: You can't join the team Lilly.

Lilly: THAT MAKES ME SO MAD!

*Lilly turns into GRAY SULK who resembles suspiciously the anime hero Guts from Berserk*

Lilly: KILL EVERYTHING!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9hjq9weDwdY

*blood splatters against Tirmek's face*

*limbs go flying everywhere*

*Lilly walks back, utterly soaked in gore*

Tirmek: Lilly.....that was almost impressive. You're in.

Lilly: Really?

Tirmek: Yes, I couldn't tortue you otherwise.
Rei32491

04-08-07, 08:25 PM		OOUrial: Yes OORei has a girlfriend.

OORei: WHY YOU LITTLE!

*begins viciously strangling OOUrial*

OORei: I'll teach you to make my life public!

OOUrial: *gurgle choke sputter* I'm sorry.

Nalfein: I'll teach you to replace me! FIREBALL!

OORei: COUNTERSPELL! You're next Nalfein.

Nalfein: eep.
urial angel of death

04-08-07, 08:27 PM		Mythos Park.

Sarah and Kerrith and trying to move as little as possibl as the Star Spawn slowly feels its way over the jeep.

Kerrith: *whispering* Sis where is that flash-light you were playing with?

Sarah: *light-wise* Under the seat. Why?

Kerrith: If it's still on that thing might spot it.

Sarah: What should we do?

Kerrith: Move very slowly and check, turning it off if it's on. I'm too big to fit under the seat.

Sarah: Okay.

Sarah very slowly and carefully crawls under the seat.

Sarah: Brother?

Kerrith: Yes?

Sarah: How do you turn it off?

Kerrith: How should I know? You were playing with it.

Sarah: Yeah well I wasn't sure what the buttons did.

Kerrith: Just start pressing switches.

Sarah: Stop talking to me like that.

Kerrith: Oh just shut-up and do what I tell you!

Sarah jumps up and hit Kerrith with the flash-light.

Sarah: I told you not to talk to me like that! :rant:

Kerrith: Sarah... :eek:

Sarah: What? :mad:

Kerrith: It sees us. :(

Sarah: Oh :blush:

Enormous claws smash through the roof.
rampant

04-08-07, 08:48 PM		Elina ducks under the charge and brings her mindblade up into Bezen's gut.

Bezen - Ouch! I forgot you're Sarah's sister, you're probably used to this. *dissapears*

Elina - Huh?

Clouds form in the sky and a bolt of lightning strikes Elina.

Elina - Right Light manipulator AND druid
Kaizer_Ryu

04-08-07, 09:12 PM		Elina: Good thing I'm versed in those as well.

Countering the next barrage of lightning, she returned fire. Quite literally.

Flaming Sphere

The ball of flame begins chasing Bezen about. As he flies out of it's range, Elina grabs it and belts it at him like a soccerball. The flames miss him by inches as he ducks, but her followup Chain Lightning shuriken does not. Though the blade fails to pierce his armor (lucky for him it hit a piece of metal), the spell goes right through (metal may not have been the best spot after all).
rampant

04-08-07, 09:19 PM		Bezen - That might have hurt, If I didn't have nearly the same defenses you do.

Elina - Got you now loud mouth.

Bezen materializes behind Elina and punts her into one of the rocks in the sphere.

Elina - Huh?

A dozen Bezen are bearing down on Elina from all directions.

Elina - Not another Naruto riff.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-08-07, 10:52 PM		Elina: FINALLY! A chance to try this against someone besides Sarah!

Each Bezen is matched by an Elina.

Bezen: GRAH!

Elina: HAH!

The dopplegangers go back and forth for some time, with Bezen scoring the first victory. With an extra man, the others overwhelm the Elina's till one is left. The last one goes kamikaze, taking out all but one of the remaining Bezen's in a hail of shadow spikes. The one left standing removes the offending weapon as it dissipates and waits for Elina to reform.

Bezen: *sniff* *sniff*

Following her scent, he makes his way into the shattered ice ball. Two major halves remain with the center cracked and splintered, creating a random network of passages through to the other side. The reflective surfaces make vision unreliable, but his nose remains true.

Bezen: Chain Lightning

The bolt streaks from his palm to hit Elina dead on as she concealed herself behind a pillar. He charged the moment the spell left his hand, only to see the double vanish the moment the spell struck.

Bezen: Oh HELL N-

Elina: *outside the sphere* RRRRAAAAAA!!!!

With a single punch, Elina forced the two halves together as the passages between it crumbled.

Bezen: *muffled* ...I loathe you.

The ball shakes as Bezen blasts his way out, looking less than happy with himself for taking the bait.
rampant

04-09-07, 12:10 AM		Bezen - THAT HURT!

Elina - This may be a problem.

Bezen's skin glows as the angel within is forced to the surface.

A 12 foot tall humanoid form in gleaming silver full-plate stands before all assembled, it spreads its 8 glowing wings and... promptly begins to bleed. The creature screams

Vorashis - YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME BEZEN! I AM ABSOLUTE!

A gaping beastial maw opens up from nowhere and swallows the hapless angel.

Bezen now stands sections of his armor have been transfomed some are the same as pieces of Vorashis's plating, others are completely unique. His wings, hide, and claws are even more bestial than ever. The wings are white furred and bat-like, The claws have lengthened and their edges are infused with solid light, the skin has taken on a reflective sheen.

Bezen - I wonder what that makes me?

Bezen takes to the sky and rains down searing beams of light at Elina.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-09-07, 01:08 AM		Honestly, Elina wondered if she was boned. Angels like Aerith were powerful, but this was something new. The amount of power she felt as the beams approached told her this much. She dodged desperately, taking more than a few hits but none directly. She sincerely wondered if her own control of shadow could match a being of light on what amounted to his home turf.

The volley of shadow-infused mindblades and pure shadow spikes met a second barrage of light. The collision resulted in a truly mystifying effect. Much like how fire and water meet to create steam, light and shadow fused together to create a vortex of shades of grey. Color disappeared from the confines of the "cloud", but little else seemed to happen.

Elina: I wonder if that-

Bezen: -was a bad thing...

In the center, a cartoon-style puff of smoke revealed an old-timey window, out of which popped a young man holding a strange blade, a duck, and a-

Elina: FOR THE LOVE OF MY MOM! I SWEAR I'M GOING TO RIP OUT YOUR SPLEEN AND WEAR IT AS A NECKLACE IF YOU DON'T CUT IT OUT RIGHT NOW!

OOKaizer: :hides: I'll be good...

Ok, back up a bit to the part about the collision of light and shadow.

The opposing energies created a blast vortex that sent both flying. Bezen was sent careening away, while Elina was slammed into the now half destroyed ice ball. Her impact caused it to spin, the momentum of which she harnessed to propel herself towards Bezen when it spun back around. The bound shifter righted himself in time to parry the mindblade chain but missed the warhammer as it smashed into his chest, nearly knocking the wind from him. The momentary stun allowed Elina time to get in his face. Her gloved arm latched on to a joint in his armor before she formed a mindblade and jammed the Ice Storm infused weapon into his right shoulder, freezing his arm. If she wanted to come out on top, staying in his face to avoid those beams of light was probably her best bet.
rampant

04-09-07, 01:34 AM		Light collects at the base of Bezen's throat.

Elina - OH COME ON ALREADY!

Bezen - RRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

The light blasts forth forcing Elina back with its searing power.

Elina - Ok you have officialy ****** me off.

As the blast passes Elina rushes in whirling a Spiked Chain.As it speeds toward Bezen it doubles its shadowself trailing in the swing. By creating a shadow double of her weapon she would deliver a double dose of the horrid wilting spell. Too Bad Bezen's blast had been reflected off the ice and came back as a scatter of beams.

Elina - AAaaaaaahhhhh

Bezen - *Punt*
Kaizer_Ryu

04-09-07, 03:39 AM		Aline: Seriously, what are you having doubts for?

Elina: He's cancelling out my powers! What can I do?!

Aline: Did it ever once occur to you that YOU might be cancelling HIS powers?

...

...

Elina: ...I knew there was a reason I kept you around.

Elina recovered from the kick and the reflected beams, meeting another beam head on. Instead of merely taking the damage, she sends it scattering in all directions with a cone-shaped shadow barrier. manifesting through her glove, the midnight crystals enhanced her attack as she sent a ball of darkness for Bezen. In an attempt to cancel it out like before, he blasted it with light energy. The beam entered the ball, but did not come out.

Well, not where it should have, at least. Bezen felt the sting of his own beam as it hit him in the back. Turning, he saw a portal of darkness closing behind him. Elina's ball of shadowmatter shot forward, striking Bezen in the back. It did not dissipate, but rather became almost like a paste. Instinctively, he tried to remove it, only to have his arms stuck along with his wings.

Bezen: GRRAAAAAHHH!!!

A flash of light dissolved the paste, but not the mindblades that tore through him like tissue paper. A retaliatory strike met with equal force as Shadow and Light duked it out head to head. Bezen did not dominate again, though, as the released mindblades left Bezen partially weakened via the life force-draining power of shadow.

Elina relented first, but with a teleport rather than a faltering defense. The surprised Bezen could not correct his momentum in time and was sent sprawling, only to be caught mid-air by Elina's whip and hurled into the ice ball. Again.

OOC: :zzz: So tired... :zzz:
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-09-07, 08:41 AM		OOC: :zzz: So tired... :zzz:
Bunny: Watching endless fights'll do that to ya.

Goku: RRRAAAAAAAA!!!!! *SUPER-SAYAN*

Bunny causes Goku's mouth to close. The sayan's body swells up from the trapped extraneous noise, then explodes.
rampant

04-09-07, 10:55 AM		Bezen Takes to the skies once more, but Elina is no where to be found.

Bezen - Where is she...OH HOLY MOTHER OF ****!

Silver - You called?

Elina had been on the other side of the battered Sphere, She had been channeling a mind-blade through one half, and duplicating the effect on the other with a shadow blade.

*BANG*CRUNCH*SMASH*CRASH*BOOM*THWAM*

Elina wins.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-09-07, 03:33 PM		Elina wins.
Bunny: Yay. :bored:

OOcat: They're going to get all mad at us if you do that.

Bunny: Is it my fault that—hold on a second.
********
Two unarmored samurai stare at each other across and empty field, not moving.

Bunny comes along and shoots both.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-09-07, 11:23 PM		Elina: *sigh* I won without passing out, and yet this *points to the final seal* is still there.

Aline: You mean you haven't figured it out yet?

Elina: I know it's a maturity issue. I need to have grown up enough to handle it and be prepared to use it properly.

Aline: :nonono: You can be so dense sometimes...

Elina: :mad:

Aline: You and Sarah's seals are in synch. So that neither would outpace the other by luck alone, Terra made the ultimate condition for release include you both reach all other conditions before they unbind.

Elina: Oh, so Sarah's not there yet?

Aline: Don't flatter yourself. Sheesh, I still can't believe I lost to you...

Elina: What was that?

Aline: Nothing. You're both not there yet, but Sarah's actually closer. She still has the bad habit of relying on her physical prowess alone.

Elina: She's a Berzerker. Of course she would.

Aline: There is a difference between strategically beating your opponent senseless and her preferred tactic of "Hit it till it dies". She's made great strides thanks to the kitty-boy, but she's still too quick on the draw.

Elina: And me?

Aline: You're a bit of a coward.

Elina: I am not!

...

...

Elina: I am, aren't I?

OOC: If you can't tell yet, Aline is Elina's Inner B*tch.
rampant

04-09-07, 11:40 PM		Tirmek wearing his brown robes, with green armor, is facing the unarmored Tellowas, who is wearing a cloak that makes him nearly indishtinguishable from his surroundings.

Tellowas disappears into the ice, Tirmek stands there.

Elina - Why is he just standing there?

Sarah - Probably some over-complicated trap.
rampant

04-10-07, 12:41 AM		Tirmek suddenly has about 10 very deep claw wounds.

From beneath the surcae of the ice Tirmek's voice emenates.

Tirmek - Did you know that water contains a signifigant amount of hydrogen, All thats needed is a little incentive for it to seperate.

Tellowas - Oh **** where is he?

Tirmek - Gotcha!

Tirmek ignoring his wounds has wrapped his hands around Tellowas's head.

*BZZZZZZT*

Tirmek wins

Tellowas - I can taste colors.

Tirmek - That shoooooould were off ... eventually ... maybe.

later


Tirmek - That is why you never let your opponent control the exchange.

Sarah - (scribbling on a notepad) control...exchange

Elina - What control he ripped off half the skin on your left side!

Tirmek - Yes, but I predicted his move, prepared a distraction at a critical moment, and hand my finisher ready.

Elina - I expect you want me to put you back together.

Tirmek - (shifts into a little girl) Pwease
Kaizer_Ryu

04-10-07, 12:53 AM		Sarah: *pouts*

Elina: *heals Tirmek* You just had to go and be all "one hit KO" didn't you?

Tirmek: I can't take hits quite like you two. It was an entirely legitimate strategy.

Sarah: *continues to pout holding her barely used recording crystal*

Elina: :nonono: I'm going to be hearing about this for the next week. You know that, right?

Tirmek: *anime sweatdrop* This is why I was worried when she discovered Yaoi...
rampant

04-10-07, 01:05 AM		Tellowas - Sound has a taste now.

Tirmek - I swear that isn't permanent. *checks big book of powers* I think.
-------------------------------------------

Sagas is an intense young half-elf his hair is bleached by the sun, his grey eyes stare with the intensity that has come to be associated with the Legacy clans. His coral trident, spare cutless, and fin motif armor make it very clear this one knows water.

Sagas - You and me batty.
ratslinky

04-10-07, 07:27 AM		Mabar, the Endless Night the blackest place of the planes and yet as Remen of the Lizrent's Sentinels watched it seemed to get a little darker this was most irregular. He approached swiftly but carefully to the place of extra darkness knowing that the darkness meant a great evil was there. Remen was a lich in service to Lizrent the Dark One a vampire of immense power though he served his master faithfully like the rest of Lizrent's servants he dreamed of the day he would become powerful enough to destroy his master and claim her realm. If the aura emanating from the area he approached then its power was a least double Lizrent's. A voice called to him from the extra dark place it showed him leading an army if he would serve her. He accepted. Touch me the voice wispered he did a felt a demonic leg.


Fernia, the Sea of Fire its name said it all really an eternally burning realm ruled by Efreet, Azer, Balor, Pit Fiends and lastly Salamander and it is a salamander that found the hand it seemed to rise up from the ground pulling itself together from flame and ash. Teez was the name of the salamander that found it. He had never seen a hand rise up from the ground before so he was worried he brought it back to the tribe leader to inquire as to what it was.

Teez: Chieftain Mez look what I found *Takes out the hand*

The Hand: *The hand always speaks Telepathically* Greetings Chieftain Mez I bring you an offer help me and I will reward you with the power of ten balor simply hold me and you will be one of my four champions

Mez: Interesting give it to me so that I may study it then leave you too *Gestures to his guards*

Teez: Yes Chieftan *He hands over the hand then he and the guards leave*

Mez: So what do I do?

The Hand: Nothing for now simply journey to Shavarath when I disappear in a flash of green
Lord Kale Fangblade

04-10-07, 07:37 AM		Sithis: batty? I was expecting at least a Fangs, or maybe even a garlick breath or some sort of pale remark. but Batty? that was the best you could think of?

All the while he speaks Sithis's hands form the somatic components for his first spell. catching Sargas of gaurd he unleashes an eldritch blast.

The bolt of red/black energy streams towards Sagas but instead of hitting him it collides with the floor.

Sagas: you missed.

Sithis: Not quite.

Sagas: * looks down* Oh-

KABOOOOMMM!!!

The explosion sends him flying thirty feet from its radius, putting him in a crumpled heap. Sagas shakes his head to clear the ringing from his ears, to spot another eldritch blast heading towards him. it strikes him in the chest and the curse attached to it takes hold, a huge feeling of lathargy fills him.

Sithis smiles as Sagas rizes slowly to his feet. he unleashes a third eldritch blast. this explodes out wards in a stream of sticky weblike strands before it hits.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-10-07, 09:00 AM		*BZZZZZZT*

Tirmek wins
Bunny: :cheer:

OOcat: Yeah, you're right, it's much better when they don't drag these things out.…………By the way, anyone know how Ivy's doing being a dad?

13: As well as I can make it go. :D
**********
Ivy: I just took my eyes off him for a second—

Dandelion: He's half-ghost, he can phase through thin barriers.

Ivy: How did you deal with him all these years? I mean, you're an average person.

Dandelion: Yeah, I'm sorry I don't fit into the freaks aboard this ship.

Ivy: It's okay. The collection's probably not complete without you.
rampant

04-10-07, 10:08 AM		Hyrd - Peek-a-boo

Baby - hehehehehe
rampant

04-10-07, 12:10 PM		Sagas counters with a blast of fire, it burns away the web and melts a portion of the ice. The half-elf slips into the water and manifests a flame sheild allowing him to move through the ice and convert it to water.

Sithis - Clever, I must remember that tri-iaahh.

Sagas strike the walls of his ice tunnel just right to set it a shudder, the shaking breaks Sithis's focus long enough for Sagas to close to melee, bring to bear flame sheild, and trident.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

04-10-07, 12:41 PM		Chance: "Hey Ash, sorry about you getting defeathered and deep frosen, I feel realy bad about that, so I called in some favors and I had a real Ring ov invisibility made, guarenteed Terra wont see you this time." Hands a still shiverig Ash a ring made of glass.

Ash "Sure, and I was hatched by feral pigions, what will it do? paint a glowing sighn over me as soon as she disrobes? highten my pain responce? Stop my power over flame? No thanks." Throws the ring into the lower decks with scorn.

Later

Jack "Hey, cool, I found a Glass ring... I wonder if its magical"

Daniels "Try it on! Try it on!"

Jack extrudes a finger from his booze composed boddy, dons the ring. "Whats hapened? whats new?"

Daniels "Dude, your invisible, like not even there, not even a shadow, its way better than those Saroun brand cheapo rings..."

Jack "Cooool This is toataly on the Rocks, I wonder what kind of idiot throws a way a perfectly good ring od invisibility?"

Chanse and 13 Exchange High fives.
Lord Kale Fangblade

04-10-07, 01:35 PM		Sithis parries the Trident easily with his longsword, which sagas just notices is new.
the silvered blade excellently crafted and the pommel contains a eberron shard. floating within the eberron shard is a powerful rune.

Sithis draws on the lifewell within him, invigorating himself. his skin takes on an opolocent sheen and his pale blue eyes become like liquid silver.
red light outlines Sithis for a moment before he vanishes. appearing behind sagas as he delivers the Vampiric touch spell stored in his sword, at the same time the eberron shard on the sword glows and Saga's fire sheild is extinguished.

Before Sagas can retalliate, Sithis vanishes like he did before. reappearing forty feet behind sagas.

Sithis: Raedra! * Vitrolic Blast coupled with Slow*

OOC: My party have the worst luck ever. not only did we waste a whole hour of real time on a problem that should have take us 5 mins ( because our wizard got immolated in the pervious session) but we then go on to roll 4 critical misses (each) and lose every party member but 1 ( who left the fight uninjured) in just one fight.
rampant

04-10-07, 02:44 PM		Sagas - So you're taking it out on me.

OOKale - Yep

Sagas throw up a barrier against the eldritch blast, and funnels the attack into the water. A wave of his hand sends the affected liquid back at Sithis. Who attempts his own barrier, but the liquid splashes off and slither's around behind. This strategy proving succsessful Sagas retreats under water and continues to use the slashing water power.
Lord Kale Fangblade

04-10-07, 04:13 PM		Brushing the acid off his face, Sithis vanishes. becoming invisible.
completely silent, he teleports a short distance.

Sithis: (ihh) Sagas's advantage is water, theres no way i can beat him on his own turf... unless i can turn the very water against him...:lightbulb

Sithis raises his right hand, making sure of saga's location.within a few seconds Sithis withdraws all the heat from all but a chunk of water around Sagas and a tunnel leading to the surface. then tearing the waters structure apart he condenses just enough of it to create a rather large pocket of Hydrogen about sagas, then shifting the oxgen density in the air.
Sithis releases the heat he kept from freezing the water as a rather large spark just behind Sagas.

BOOOOOMMMMM
urial angel of death

04-10-07, 04:33 PM		OOC: My party have the worst luck ever. not only did we waste a whole hour of real time on a problem that should have take us 5 mins ( because our wizard got immolated in the pervious session) but we then go on to roll 4 critical misses (each) and lose every party member but 1 ( who left the fight uninjured) in just one fight.

You wouldn't have had that problem if Rei were in your group. He's super-wizard he takes hits that would kill the party cleric with ease, and only the front-line fight outpases him for HP. (continues rant of a DM who's players always have very good roles)
Lord Kale Fangblade

04-10-07, 04:47 PM		You wouldn't have had that problem if Rei were in your group. He's super-wizard he takes hits that would kill the party cleric with ease, and only the front-line fight outpases him for HP. (continues rant of a DM who's players always have very good roles)

Unfortunatly I wasnt Dming for the group this time, since he was on his easter break form universtiy and old friend wanted to do a one off.

also, Rei must be extremly luckly. my 8th level wizard had 18 hp. yes, he was the one who got toasted. at the time, he was on -9 hp, that was Before the fireball hit him.
after that, all the alchemist fire i had on me exploded. not the best day in dnd history for me.

though about high rolling, i know what you mean. the group that i do DM have this warlock that always seems to roll 18s and 20s.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-10-07, 05:25 PM		Hyrd - Peek-a-boo

Baby - hehehehehe
Dandelion: He seems to be taking this well.

OOC: rampant, response is up to you.
urial angel of death

04-10-07, 05:29 PM		Rei always has atleast 16 Con on his wizards and rolling a 3 on Hit Dice for level up is considered "unlucky" for him.
rampant

04-10-07, 06:27 PM		Ivy - He's good with kids. Its you he doesn't like.

Dandelion - Which explains why my all my luggage got burned.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-10-07, 06:57 PM		Ivy - He's good with kids. Its you he doesn't like.
13: Well that's going to be an interesting dynamic.

Silver: Especially seeing how Dandelion isn't in contest with Hyrd.

OOcat: Come on, you two, it's jelousy. Your mouths should be watering.

13 & Silver: Okay, :drool:
rampant

04-10-07, 07:23 PM		Hyrd - Of course there no competition. Ivy MINE

Overpossesive glomp and fiery glare at Dandelion.

Ivy - He's right the things he can do with that tounge.
rampant

04-10-07, 07:44 PM		Sagas - I ****ing hate mages.

Sithis wins

Sithis vs. Sarah (i'll let kaizer and Kale hash that one out)

Elina Vs. Tirmek

The semi-final round Arena is a massive spiral stairway, both the "upside", and the "downside have their own subjective gravity. When you get to the "top" of one side you are moved to the "bottom" of the other. (think like the stairway from the KH2 intro Kaizer)

Elina - RAAAAAAAH

OORampant - :hides: She's really not going to like Corre's next plot line.

Kithle - This one never learns.

Terrek - I dunno these seem half-way practical.

Kithle - We're hurting him anyway right.

Terrek - I thought that went without saying.
rampant

04-10-07, 08:40 PM		Elina - You little fink thats why you went to me for healing!

Tirmek - One less spell for you, and I save a few power points.

Crowd - Kill the prick! Kill the prick!

Tirmek - Yeah yeah I know you love me.:D

Elina - You're reveling in their hatred aren't you.

Tirmek - Just a little.
Rei32491

04-10-07, 09:02 PM		Rei always has atleast 16 Con on his wizards and rolling a 3 on Hit Dice for level up is considered "unlucky" for him.

I have never understood why people would have low Con for their wizards.

My Kobold is a level 6 sorcerer and level one Elemental savant (fire), and he has about 44 hp right now, not to long ago he was brought down from 44 hp to 4 hp by a shadow dancer with these annoying-ass daggers. We ended up killing him, and he turned into a wraith and so I had a Vrock that was temporarily serving me Teleport the wraith to the other side of the world. :P

P.S The Elemental savant's hit die is still 1d4 (for those of you who don't know)
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-10-07, 09:41 PM		Ivy - …the things he can do with that tounge.
Silver: Why do you thinkt there are so many half-dragons? ;)

13: Hyrd seems to be progressing along jelousy nicely.

OOcat: It's still weird to me that he's so unconfident.

13: You think timekeeping is weird. :P

Bunny: Now what?

OOcat: "Now what" what?

Bunny: What are you going to do with them?

OOcat: Same thing I do with all my characters……MAKE ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE!

Chorus: Their OOcat…their OOcat and its brain, brain, brain, brain, brain, brain, brain, brain, brain. *doodly doo doo*

Bunny: I'm really surprised any of us put up with you. :bored:
Kaizer_Ryu

04-10-07, 09:58 PM		Tirmek - One less spell for you, and I save a few power points.
Elina: Well, it's a good thing I've got Warlock-like shadow abilities.

Tirmek: Which should make Sarah and Sithis' duel that much more interesting. *shines flashlight*

Sarah: BARK! BARK! BARK!
Charles Phipps

04-10-07, 10:15 PM		OOC: So, almost done with this plot? I'd like to go back to the Light Warriors one if people are still interested.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-10-07, 10:24 PM		OOC: I say go ahead with the not-so-Light Warriors. The two can go side by side as far as I'm concerned.
Charles Phipps

04-10-07, 10:44 PM		OOC: I know but I don't want to distract y'all (hick voice) with my work while you're focused and unable to contribute due to plot b.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-10-07, 11:33 PM		OOC: The thing is, I'm not sure how fast Sarah vs Sithis will go. I'm typically not available to post till about 7-8 pm, and that's midnight or later for Kale (I assume you're roughly GMT).

I might be available earlier than normal tomorrow, and that would make it easier for both of us, but I can't guarantee anything (read: possible but fairly unlikely).

Unless you don't mind waiting, we can concentrate on the spoof and have at least that duel be a secondary plot.

I'm sure Silvercat would be happy. ;)
rampant

04-11-07, 01:22 AM		OOC: Just do what you can, use PMs to put together the whole battle then post it all at once if you don't wanna play post-and-wait.
--------------------------------------

Tirmek - Well we're up first.

Elina - Of course we are.
---------------------------------

Tirmek is starting at the Middle of the "underside", while Elina gets the same position on the "uperside".

begin

Elina rushes down the stairs trying to get to a point accross from Tirmek.

Tirmek simply calls a weapon to hook around the edge and flips himself over using the unusual gravity his advantage, this gives him a clear shot at Elina with another called weapon.

Elina - OUCH! GRRRRRR YOU'RE DOING IT ON PURPOSE!

Both of Tirmek's called weapons bear a strong resemblance to Keyblades, Starseeker and Oathkeeper.

Elina - :twitch: don't let him provoke you.

Tirmek manifests an astral construct in the form of a humanoid Duck and another as a lanky dog-like humanoid.

Elina - :headexplo:
Kaizer_Ryu

04-11-07, 02:31 AM		OOKaizer: :bigeyes:

Elina: If it will make the shameless mimicing stop, at least for a little bit after this is done, then fine.

OOKaizer: :w00t:

Elina: *glowy* Give me strength!

A flash of light blinds Tirmek for an instant, before revealing Elina in Final Form. Decisive Pumpkin and Sleeping Lion swirl about her.

OOKaizer: *GLEE* :cloud9:

Elina: Bring it.

Donald(who are we kidding): Blizzaga!

Elina: Reflectga!

Goofy(seriously): :eek: Gwaaaaahhhh!!!! :gel:

Elina immediately goes on the offensive. She closes the distance in the blink of an eye and begins wailing on Tirmek, the swirling blades doing a number on Donald as the boy successfully parries most of the blows.

OOrampant: You do remember she needs party members to go Final Form, right?

OOKaizer: It's an arena match, so Coliseum rules apply. Drive Forms usable without partymembers. :P

Tirmek & Donald: Flare Force!

Elina: :gah:

OOrampant: Fair enough.

OOKaizer: :mad:
rampant

04-11-07, 03:09 AM		Tirmek is using wisdom form to slip around the arena too fast for Elina to get a solid bead on him, all the while pinging her with the little arrow shots.

Elina - THis is getting old! Hey wait I have the dash abiliy too!

Tirmek - Attempting to close to melee good show!

Elina - HUH?

Tirmek - *FIRAGA*FIRAGA*FIRAGA*FIRAGA*FIRAGA*MAGI C COMBO*

Elina - *cough* Eat ice punk! *Bliz-oof

Goofy - Hyuck!

Tirmek - *Spilt*

Donald - *Drive restore*

Goofy - *Megalixer*

Tirmek - *Master Form*Change Starseeker for Bond of Flame*

Elina - Not Again!

Tirmek - *MASTER FIRAGA*MASTER FIRAGA*MASTER FIRAGA*MASTER FIRAGA*MASTER FIRAGA COMBO*

Elina - (i.h.h. ok this is starting to tax even my defenses)
Kaizer_Ryu

04-11-07, 03:28 AM		Elina: *REFLECTGA*

Tirmek: GRAH! *toasted*

Elina: Final Form owns all. Faster, stronger, magic up the wazoo. Oh yes. MP Haste and unblockable combos. Curaga!

*VISCIOUS COMBO BEATING* *FINAL ARCANUM*

Tirmek: Ow.

Elina: :D I love MP Rage. *CRIME PENALTY*

Tirmek: Oh HE-

*THUNDAGA X 5* *FIRAG-*

Tirmek: *REFLECTGA*

Elina: *cough* Grrr. *MAGNEGA*

Tirmek: :gel:

*VISCIOUS COMBO BEATING* *FINAL OVER*

Tirmek: *on the ground* Maybe giving up my third party member wasn't such a great idea after all...
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-11-07, 09:02 AM		Commentary Crew: :bored:

OOcat: Sorry, but Disney characters……it's like a child's nightmare. :yuck:
rampant

04-11-07, 11:47 AM		Tirmek - One last chance! *SPLIT* *TRINITY LIMIT*

Elina - Ouch!

--------------------------

The shockwave has cleared all the excess KH references.

Elina - Thank you

OORampant - Just call off your goons.

Elina - Ok guys he's done.

Squirrel mafia stops pelting OORampant,...releuctantly.
------------------------------------

Elina - That'll keep them guessing.

Tirmek - They've never seen a Dimension Translation like this before, it seems to be an ability you get from being around the FF.

Elina - So how are we gonna decide who wins?

Tirmek - Hahh!

Tirmek Charges with his impact Hammer.

Elina - No chance Panther boy!

Elina manifests a dizzying array of Mindblades, and shadow blades, Creating a swarm of death between her and Tirmek.
DragoonDarkfire

04-11-07, 02:40 PM		Marik, Yeth, Buckrill, Optamis and Dino'forged are walking through the jungles of Xen'drik.

Marik: so... is there any reason you're not trying to kill us?

Dino'forged: Megatron is here. Destruction of Optamis... would simply lead to a weakness in my strength.

Yeth: do you take everything this seriously?

Dino'forged: you cannot take any risks... on the battlefield.

Marik: by the host... YOU'RE SOLID SNAKE!?

Bucrkill: OK Buckrill don't say anything. Remember your karma, if you say something sarcastic or insulting it'll just bite you in the ass. Just politely laugh and try not to show any twinge of sarcasm...

Buckrill: HAHA! That's a good one Marik.

Marik: wow Buckrill thanks.

Buckrill: Murder.

Marik: wha?

Buckrill: Oh I'm sorry I meant- murder.

_____________________________

After a trek for hours un-end the party comes to the mountain of Dragonshard.

Marik: HOLY FREEKING CRAP!

Dino'forged: With this much energon... WE COULD CRUSH THE DECEPTIFORGED!

Optamis: No Dinoforged. We need to harvest this energon carefully and use it's powers for peace.

Dino'forged: don't be a fool Optamis... you lack AGGRESSION!

We see Marik sitting on a throne of Dragonshards, with a crown of Siberys shard, Yeth is at his side dressed in a harem outfit.

Marik: Aggression is goooooooooooooood....

Buckrill: You know that since you're technically a dragonmarked scion now you can't own any land according to the rules of Galifare.

Marik: SCREW THE RULES I HAVE MONEY!

Suddenly the LoB's appears at the peak of the mountain with his Deceptiforged at his side.

LoB: PRIME!

Optamis: MEGATRON!

LoB: It does not matter. The Deceptiforged name this mountain in the name of the DECEPTIFORGED!

A shuriken goes flying into the LoB's eye

Marik: SCREW THAT! I AM NOT GIVING UP MY ONE CHANCE TO BE WEALTHY BEYOND MY WILDEST DREAMS!

He pulls out a massive shuriken while shouting "BANKAI!"

Marik: AUTOFORGED- and company- LET'S ROLL OUT!

And thus does an epic battle begin on the mountain of shard, unfortunately we're too cheap to show it so we'll just skip it all the way to the climax.

We see Marik fighting Firespike, Dino'forged is fighting Jetlyndara and Buckrill and Yeth are facing Scorpinoc. Optamis is fighting Megatron.

Firespike: YOU LACK THE POWERS TO STOP ME FOOL!

Marik: SCREW YOU! I GOT A DRAGONMARK!

Marik pulls off his shirt.

Marik: AND WATCH WHAT IT CAN DO!

Marik begins to concentrate and then the entire mountain begins to glow.

Optamis: why is the mountain glowing?

Dino'forged: THE ENERGON! IT'S ACTIVATING!

Yeth: Buckrill. What does energon do?

Buckrill: how should I know? This is Siberys Dragonshard, everyone knows that it enhances the power... of... dragonmarks... FU-

Everyone disappears in a rift of time and space.

TIME PARADOX
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-11-07, 06:04 PM		TIME PARADOX
OOcat: So is this going to be time-travel?

13: That's always fun.

Silver: :dancin: Heeeeeeeee's his own gran'paaaaaaaaaa…

Bunny: Not if Marik kills him.

Silver: What is it with you and fratricide?

Bunny: I didn't come up with it. I merely follow it.

13: :D It makes peoples' brains hurt.

OOcat: Wait…if Marik becomes his own grandfather than he can prevent his own existence by killing himself. That really makes things simple.

Silver: Assuming he wants to.

Bunny: Finding out that you :pile:-ed your own grandmother can do that to a man.
DragoonDarkfire

04-11-07, 06:37 PM		In a bright flash we see Marik and Dino'forged land in the middle of a grassy field.

Marik: OW!

Dino'forged: Where are we?

Marik: I don't know. It looks kinda familiar however...

In a sudden blaze we see an army of Warforged going out against an army of men around them.

Marik: WHAT'S GOING ON!?

Dino'forged: It would appear your "Dragonmark" has sent us to some random location in time and space.

Marik: But WHERE in time and space?

Random Solider: FOR CYRE!

Marik: Oh.

Marik and Dino'forged leave the battlefeild walking toward Metrol in un-destroyed Cyre.

Marik: Well Dino'forged I have an idea...

Dino'forged: And that is?

Marik: We're going to uncover the cause of the Mourning and prevent it. WE'LL BE HEROES!

Dino'forged: But if the Mourning never happened then how will you prove it did?

Marik: ... SCREW YOU! HEROES I SAY!

______________________________________

We see Buckrill and the LoB land in this huge temple.

Buckrill: Where are we?

LoB: I do not know...

They look outside to see an army of Quori fighting an army of Titans.

Buckrill: Oh... I see.

LoB: then we have come to the setting of my rise to power. Yeeees.

Buckrill: Listen pal, unless you want to totally **** up the time line. DON'T DO ANYTHING!

LoB: Don't be foolish. What's the worst that could happen?

LoB looks down to see his arms have been replaced by egg beaters.

Lord of Egg Beaters: ... oh.

____________________________________

We see Optamis, Scorpinoc, Jetlyndara and Firespike land in the middle of a swamp.

Optamis: Where are we?

A group of Orcs gather around them.

Orc: HEY LOOK! BIG METAL THING!

Jetlyndara: How simple minded...

A huge black dragon lands behind them.

Dragon: HEAR ME ORCS OF THE SHADOW MARCHES! I AM VARAAK!

Orcs: OOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooo

Varaak: I have come to teach you the secrets of a magic in order for you to bind an army of evil outsiders that will come to invade Eberron.

Jetlyndara: Hey, you guys wanna see something funny to do with Dragons?

Scorpinoc, Firespike and Optamis nod their heads.

Varaak: THE WAY TO IMPRISONING AND DEFEATING THIS THREAT FROM XORIAT IS-

a bolder lands on Varaaks head

Varaak: CUPCAKES! YES CUPCAKES! CUPCAKES FOR ALL!

The Orcs look at eachother, shrug and then begin to bow while chanting.

Orcs: ALL HAIL VARAAK! ALL HAIL CUPCAKES!

Optamis: That WAS funny.

Jetlyndara: Thanks. You should see what happens when you use it on Hobgoblins...

__________________________________

Yeth lands in the middle of a sea of brimstone and fire.

Yeth: How the heck did I get here?

A Rakshasa Raja appears behind her

Raja: BOW BEFORE ME PUNY MORTAL! FOR I AM-

Yeth: OH MY ILYAHNNA! Where did you get those cloths?

Raja: The flesh of tortured children.

Yeth: Well that's explains why it's smooth like a babies bum. Have you even thought of Glamerweave?
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-11-07, 08:28 PM		Varaak: THE WAY TO IMPRISONING AND DEFEATING THIS THREAT FROM XORIAT IS-

a bolder lands on Varaaks head

Varaak: CUPCAKES! YES CUPCAKES! CUPCAKES FOR ALL!
13: Surprisingly, that should still work.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-12-07, 12:17 AM		OOC: You can keep going with Elina vs Tirmek, rampant. I now know what Crystalforged was talking about after his car accident a while ago when he said it knocked the crazy out of him.

Rearending someone at 30 MPH will freak anyone out. (I'm fine, just rattled)
Crystalforged

04-12-07, 12:56 AM		Oy, that sucks. I hope your car wasn't totaled. Good luck with that though, I know I was twitchy for two or three days afterwards.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-12-07, 01:13 AM		Oy, that sucks. I hope your car wasn't totaled. Good luck with that though, I know I was twitchy for two or three days afterwards.OOC: Thanks, but it's totaled. Front end doesn't exist anymore. :raincloud:

I admit it was my fault, but the car was 17 years old (Toyotas are cool that way :D ). I was planning on getting a new one eventually. This just made my "when" decision for me. :rolleyes:
Charles Phipps

04-12-07, 01:33 AM		I extended fight sequences have made me assume Elina is Chun-Li, Sarah is Cammy, and Tirmek is Ryu.

;-)
rampant

04-12-07, 01:42 AM		Ketler - Would you be willing to part with the remains. :schemes:
-----------------------------

Tirmek - I don't think you quite grasp the theory behind this weapon.

As the first line of blades reaches Tirmek he swings the hammer parrying several blows, while his impact shockwave repels the rest.

Elina - (i.h.h. crud that hammer trick is also defensive)
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-12-07, 07:49 PM		OOC: If the world's safest driver: I can't drive. ;) (No, seriously.)
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

04-12-07, 08:03 PM		OOC: I'll go one better I refuse to learn to drive becase I walk every wear to limit my Carbon footprint.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-13-07, 08:41 AM		OOcat: :lightbulb

13: What now?

OOcat: I just realized why Lilly can't be Evil.

13: Enlighten us.

Bunny: As if we really care.

OOcat: Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. Lilly doesn't have any knowledge.

Bunny: He's got power.

OOcat: Oh, right. Well then, I'd better try posting the stats of Dandelion and Saguaro.

Silver: Saguaro?

OOcat: I figure since Lilly isn't his father that he shouldn't have to go through life with the name Spoony.

13: :weep: Spent so long on that one.


Dandelion Tomas

Female human commoner 3

A girl Lilly and Ivy met in the Cyre/Valenar town of Lier who was being duped by the crazy priest Carrot Top into doing his bidding. During a celebration over showing up the mad cleric everyone got drunk and high, and the "comic result" ensued. Then they never saw her again for more than 5 years. [This is actuall how the manga does it.]
However she got pregnant by Ivy, resulting in a child that ages like an elf not affected by the Races of the Wild mature elf age change. She thought the kid was Lilly's because Ivy had been a ghost at the time, so he really didn't make that much of an impression on her. However Caralot's genetic testing revealed that Ivy is indeed the father.
Rather than rely on spotty child support from the FF, Dandelion decided to move in with Ivy. For some reason Hyrd doesn't like her.

Saguaro "Spoony" Tomas-Galan

male half-ghost-half-elf ??? 0

His father's condition at time of conception gives him a limited corporeality and allows him to sometimes phase through thin barriers. Hyrd seems to get along with him.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-13-07, 10:35 AM		Dandelion: So this is Lilly's room?

Ivy: Yeah, but I'd stay out if I were you. Saguaro shouldn't go in either.

Dandelion: Any reason besides your deadbeat brother's Wolf-girl porn collection?

Ivy: ...there's an evil monkey in his closet.

At this, the closet door swings open and:

Marigold: http://jimintonic.com/archives/fg.evil.monkey.jpg

OOC: Sorry, couldn't resist.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-13-07, 04:30 PM		Marigold: I'm not Evil, I'm merely Cranky.
rampant

04-13-07, 05:43 PM		Ivy - You might also wanna be careful of Hyrd's workshop.

Dandelion - I thought he made plushies?

Ivy - True but some of them explode, some are worse, and most of the nasty ones have additional "Hug-me" spells installed.

Dandelion - Saguaro's Teddy!

Ivy - Animals don't explode, well except the plush bombadier beetles.
Paulon

04-13-07, 06:02 PM		OOPaulon: The idea of having hug-me spells on Hyrd's plushies rather takes the fun out of them. It's a heck of a lot funnier to have him throw a grenade which people can't resist hugging due to sheer cuteness, even when they know it's a grenade. Like when Lily tried to off him once.
rampant

04-13-07, 09:00 PM		OOC: Most of them are irrestibly cute, its just the really obnoxious ones like the slime wave, you know the ones that even Hyrd can't make someone want to touch. The bombs really are that cute, its the smelly, or otherwise sickening ones that need help.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-13-07, 11:29 PM		OOC: Ok, lets see if I can get things moving again.

Elina - (i.h.h. crud that hammer trick is also defensive)
Elina: Ok, next idea.

She forms several shadow balls, forgoing mindblades at the moment, and chucks them at Tirmek. He considers swinging, but observing her fight with Bezen tells him to do otherwise. He jumps out of the way instead, dodging each in succession.

Tirmek: (i.h.h.) She's up to something. She may have limitless use of it, but she's not one to waste moves...

The balls that miss continue down the steps, bouncing while following the curve of the spiral as they descend. After several moments, she ceases and returns to a frontal assault. Tirmek parrys her newly formed blade, the shockwave disrupting her second swing long enough for him to slip under her arm and send her sprawling down the steps.

Righting herself in mid air, Elina lands with minimal difficulty and renews her barrage of shadow balls. Again, Tirmek dodges, but this time he's above her on the incline.

Tirmek: Oh cr- *SPLAT*

The momentum of the inital volley carried the balls only so far before they began falling down the steps again. Tirmek managed to get both legs stuck as well as most of his lower body covered in the sticky shadow-gunk.

Tirmek: :mad:

Elina: It'll come out, don't worry. I'm not about to upset your mother. That's Sarah's job. :devil:

Taking advantage of his bound state, Elina unleashed a volley of ice-infused mindblades. They didn't reach their intended target, however, as Tirmek's arms and hammer were still free. In order to avoid sticking the hammer in the goo, Tirmek was forced to swing wide. This left his weapon open, letting Elina wrap a chain about the handle below the head of the hammer and rip it from his grasp.
rampant

04-14-07, 12:06 AM		Tirmek - Elina, you are a very skilled warrior for our age, Hell as far as technique, you are a whole order of magnitude above me, but you can be oh so very stupid sometimes.

Elina - Huh?

SKUGAFWOOOM

Elina - *COUGH* that ... hurts

Tirmek - (in tattered robes)you think that's bad? try detonating a shadow magic bind on your own lower body sometime.

Sarah - (shouting from the stands) THATS RIGHT! SHOW US SOME LEG! *holds up imaging crystal*

Tirmek - :blush: *Grows out the fur on his legs farther*

Elina - Thank you

Sarah - awww

Elina - Now what's with that stupid cra-

*CRACK*

Elina - Ugh

Tirmek - Its a soulforged weapon, not unlike your soulknives.

Elina - I'm gonna-

*Crack*

Tirmek - Please just stay down, I don't know how much more your regeneratives can take.

Elina's wounds are healing, but slowly.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-14-07, 12:31 AM		Elina: Heh...you should know by now I'm a sore loser...

*CRACK*

Elina: Ugh...

Tirmek again raised the weapon again, hoping she would aquiesce for once. She sat there with a look on her face that he couldn't quite decide whether it was begrudging acceptance or knowing confidence. His ears, however, picked up the sound of bouncing, much like that which had come from the-

Elina: Like I said...I hate to lose... :smirk:

The balls she had lobbed at him to begin with had made their way down the underside of the steps, following the curve till they arrived beneath the two combatants. The group of shadow matter stopped and flung itself off to the side, the gravity switch sending them up and around to where Tirmek was standing. In the process, they reformed into spikes and embedded themself in the hand and arm Tirmek held the Soulforged weapon in. Tirmek dropped the weapon out of pain and surprise as Elina stood up shakily.

Elina: Sorry. Can't affort to look uncool. And...that's it for me...

Elina fell back with a thud, exhausted and overtaxed.

Tirmek wins.
rampant

04-14-07, 12:41 AM		Tirmek - um help, I've got a giant spike in my arm.


OOC: OK Sarah vs. Sithis.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-14-07, 02:08 AM		OOC: OK Sarah vs. Sithis.
Sithis: Angsty Vampire Warlok with anger management problems against Crazy Suferot Werewolf with a hair trigger...

Sarah: Good thing we're not liable for damages.

Tirmek: Hello? My arm? *spikes fizzle out* ...never mi- *gush of blood* GAH!
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-14-07, 10:53 AM		Sithis: Angsty Vampire Warlok with anger management problems against Crazy Suferot Werewolf with a hair trigger...
13: It's like Underworld on acid trip.

Silver: Hmmm……:shifty:

OOcat: NO! BAD GODDESS! NO GET IDEAS!
rampant

04-14-07, 04:34 PM		Sithis - Good thing I was able to keep Xiath from eating my gear.

---------------------
Yesterday

Redshirt 79799 - Wonder why the vamp kid wanted all of us here?

Glaive Redshirt 31 - He even gave us decent gear.

Redshirt commander - Dunno just said to keep everyone else out.

Xiath - gooo

Redshirt 79799 - Oh she's so cute- MY HAND!
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-14-07, 05:03 PM		Redshirt 79799 - Oh she's so cute- MY HAND!
Redshirt commander: Newbie.

Bunny: Yes, so he really doesn't count. :evillaugh

*scene of carnage replaced primarily because it's boring*

Bunny: Satnak, Ketty. It's too bad they're the only ones.

Xiath: Goo. *CHOMP*

Bunny (with Xiath hanging off an ear): Won't work, kid, despite what that weenie Lovecraft has to say about it.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-14-07, 05:58 PM		Sarah and Sithis each begin in the middle of the staircase, Sarah on the "up" side, Sithis on the "down". Sarah's light armor seems to shed shadow in smoke-like whisps, a byproduct of the midnight crystals set within the fabric.

OOC: I'll let you do Sithis' into, Kale. Feel free to start things off any time.

-----

Tirmek: *flexing his repaired arm* Thank you, Nina.

Nina: :D Hee hee.

Tirmek: Impressive. You fully regenerated a wound like that at your age. I can't even feel it anymore.

Nina: Mom says it's because of the shadow-thingy. Helps rebuild things from the bottom up.

Tirmek: How's Elina? I think I over did it with the soulforged weapon.

Nina: She's still asleep. Deis and Momo Ne-chan are there.

Tirmek: Oh, good. They'll take care of her.

Nina: I'm not so sure that's a good thing...

-----

Elina: :zzz:

Momo: You're so not funny.

Deis: :devil:

Elina's face has cat whiskers, stripes, and a little nose drawn in Magic Marker. Her drool has been turned red and a drawing of a half-eaten mouse ends at her mouth. A little speech bubble with "Nyaa~!" written on her cheek completes the picture.

Momo: Give me those! *grabs the markers*

Terra: *ahem*

Momo: :eek:

Deis: :angel: *to Momo* :P

Terra: :bored: Nice try young lady.

Deis: Rats. :raincloud
rampant

04-14-07, 06:15 PM		Tirmek - snicker

Elina - What's so funny?

Xiath - URRRRRRRRRP

A dented helmet smacks tirmek upside the head.

Tirmek - OUCH! whose rc?
Crystalforged

04-15-07, 03:35 AM		OOC: Well, since Silver told me he wasn't going to do it I figure I might as well stop procrastinating and do it myself.



IC: Erk's place. Kanatash and Caralot are standing around looking expectant.

Bruce and Darastrix step through one of the many portals with Kitten standing between them, still looking somewhat sullen.

Kanatash: (crying a river, literally) MY BABY! BY BABY IS HOME! (catches Kitten in rib crunching embrace)

Caralot: Hi, mom. Hi, dad. Its nice to see you again.

Kitten: Can't... breath... organs... liquifying... pain... inconcievable...

Darastrix: Don't worry, I've got this one. (uses mad ninja skills to extricate Kitten and replace her with a teddy bear)

Kanatash: (still sobbing uncontrollably, he has already soaked the bear completely and a pool of water is forming around him) My baby!

Rosevelt: (trying to free himself) Hey! Watch the fur!

Kitten: (catching her breath) Wow, whats up with mom? I was only gone a month or two.

Caralot: Actually while you were gone a couple of the EBNE's got impatient for their characters to grow up so they had a timeskip. Its been over two years since you left.

Kitten: :mymy: Really? I guess that explains why mom is so broken up.

Caralot: Nah, I expect he would have had more or less the same reaction if you came back the day after you left. Now why don't you go try and console him before he floods half the ship?

Kitten: Alright. (goes and puts an arm around the still sobbing Kanatash)

Caralot: (turning to her parents) So. How is she?

Bruce: She's... better. Thats about all I can say. For better of worse she's still nowhere near as naive or trusting as she was originally but by the same token her bitterness and hatred of the world has mellowed somewhat. She might even have a chance at being a well balanced individual, *glaces at the STILL wailling Kanatash* though I somehow doubt that.

Caralot: *sigh* Well thats something. We'll have to wait and see how much of what she learned with you took.



OOC: I've been meaning to ask you silver, just how much has Kitten's personality changed from her little trip to Caralot's Dimension and what is she like now?
rampant

04-15-07, 04:31 AM		OOC: I don't know how her personality changed, but she just got set back to Teiza's class, which actually helps because now she can be the source of common sense for that group, because lets face it, Teiza doesn't have the good sense Gygax gave a bard.

Satnak - I told you to leave the black and white striped ones alone.

Teiza - *Sulking in a large bucket of tamato juice.* I still think anything that slow and conspicuos wants to be eaten.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-15-07, 10:01 AM		OOC: I've been meaning to ask you silver, just how much has Kitten's personality changed from her little trip to Caralot's Dimension and what is she like now?
OOC: I have taught her that life doesn't always (or possibly ever, depending upon how crazy you aren't) make sense, that people prefer things to be predictable rather than intelligently thought out, and that evil people are the ones who are overconfident about their views being right. Essentially she's learned that her universe is going to work the way it works, not the way she thinks it should be working, and that she can try to change it but that she should accept that she may both not get the results she wanted and be wrong.

How exactly that effects her personality is up to you.
Lord Kale Fangblade

04-15-07, 04:31 PM		Sithis wears his normal Darkleaf Breast plate with Bracers as well as thigh and Shin guards. underneath that he wears his dark weave noble mans outfit, with the usual black sash about his waist. dangling from the sleeve on his left hand is a bracelet with several smoke-black beads attached to it hovering within each of the beads is a magical rune.

attached to his black belt are his scroll case, spell components pouch, several belt pouches and a few wands. hanging from his belt are three silver charms, in the shape of elven runes attached to tiny silver chains.
Instead of his heavy black coat Sithis wears a black cloak, mounted in the pin is a oily black Khyber shard.

he also wears two plain silver rings on the fingers of his right hand, A black Ankh with a ruby in the shape of a drop of blood about his neck and a silver circlet about his head.
In its scabbard on his left side is the elegantly curving silvered longsword he wielded in his battle against Sagas. The Eberron shard still gleams slightly with the absorbed energy of Sagas’s shield of fire.

Sithis seems stirred by an ethereal wind as he gazes forwards, as the battle commences he becomes outlined in a red light for the briefest moment before he vanishes, only to reappear on Sarah's side of the stair case.
Sithis unleashes a Brimstone Blast with his right hand coupled with a Vitrolic blast with his left hand.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-15-07, 07:02 PM		The blasts passed right through as the doppleganger fizzled out. It was always so hard to tell what was real and what was not with this family. From years of experience, he knew where she was likely to be, quickly drawing his blade and parrying the silent strike coming from behind.

Sarah: Drat.

With his free hand, he sent a blast of eldrich energy at her at point blank range. The blast detonated on contact, sending him flying backwards. Regaining his footing, he tried to figure out how it had backfired.

Nothing about Sarah indicated she was harmed aside from the smoking remains of the spell about her. She lunged him as he landed, missing with the first strike and striking his sword with the second. Sithis gripped his sword tightly and used his leverage to spin the semi-airborne girl around, causing her to land hard before she used her momentum to roll to her feet.

Sarah: :crazy: ...dizzy... *shakes her head*

As Sarah regained her bearings, Sithis made a few motions, conjuring a ball of flame and eldrich energy. It shot at her, only to be reflected at the last moment. He dove out of the way this time, but he had seen it. Her armor had channeled shadow energy into a protective barrier that absorbed and returned his spell.

Sithis: Tirmek designed that for you, didn't he?

Sarah: Nope. Teiza.

Sithis: Ok...Tirmek gave you the idea, then.

Sarah: Uh-uh.

Sithis: Elina?

Sarah: No.

Sithis: ...Gaz?

Sarah: :mad: Why is it so hard to believe I thought of it myself?

Sithis: Um... :shifty:
rampant

04-15-07, 07:20 PM		Momo - I helped!

Terra - I know, right now we are focusing on getting you three cleaned up.

Momo - Why do follow her into these messes?

Teiza - Don't ask me, by now you should have learned i'm only going to get everyone in trouble.

Zoom out to reveal Momo getting a Tomato juice bath, while watching the fights on a crystal screen.

Scias - :D

Momo - What burns me up is he managed to avoid getting sprayed, and he somehow got himself a skunkskin cap out of this whole mess.
----------------------------------------------------------------

Elina - If you're so desperate to see something Tirmek came up with...

Sithis - Not gonna happen! *eldritch blast*

Elina runs over the edge of the stairs, her gauntleted left hand blazing with heat and sinking into the stone of the steps. As she goes over she uses it to lever herself under.

Sithis - Oh Crap

Sarah Comes up the other side, Sithis unleashes a quick brimstone blast that only serves to increase the heat of the half-melted rock that slaps itself accross his face.

Sithis - This really hurts.

Sarah activates her gauntlets once more and a blast of cold freezes the slag into place.

Sithis - Thats just mean. *swarm form**reform*

The slag drops.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-15-07, 09:21 PM		Sarah: :mad: Why is it so hard to believe I thought of it myself?

Sithis: Um... :shifty:
Narrative-Element Explanation Bird: Because you're the physical, unintellectual twin.

OOcat: Wow, it's been a while since we've seen you.

NEEB: Well you're the only one who bloody well makes use of the concept.
Elina ……Elina……Sarah……
Bunny: Oh, hey, two against one.

13: My money's on Tirmek loosing.

OOKaizer: But he's not in this fight. :confused:

13: Either Sarah wins and she's insufferable, or she looses and needs consolement. :D
Kaizer_Ryu

04-15-07, 09:27 PM		OOC: For your viewing pleasure, I give to you the anime rendition of a typical fight between members of the Second Generation as demonstrated by System of a Down and the BEST. AMV. EVER. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_uwj6n0509A)

PS: Sorry about the low quality, but I can't find one on Youtube that matches what I have.
Charles Phipps

04-15-07, 10:38 PM		Here's an image of Doog Junior and Lilly!

Or Iron Fist and Luke Cage, your choice

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DP7gMt7SqYQ
Crystalforged

04-15-07, 11:47 PM		OOC: I have taught her that life doesn't always (or possibly ever, depending upon how crazy you aren't) make sense, that people prefer things to be predictable rather than intelligently thought out, and that evil people are the ones who are overconfident about their views being right. Essentially she's learned that her universe is going to work the way it works, not the way she thinks it should be working, and that she can try to change it but that she should accept that she may both not get the results she wanted and be wrong.

How exactly that effects her personality is up to you.
Alright then. I think I'm essentially going to say that she's still pretty cynical and bitter about people but shes resigned to the fact that she can't really change it either. She also believes that people in general are selfish, vain, idiots although she's willing to admit exceptions in the case of individuals.

In other words she thinks everyone is an idoit except for some of the people she knows.

OOC: I don't know how her personality changed, but she just got set back to Teiza's class, which actually helps because now she can be the source of common sense for that group, because lets face it, Teiza doesn't have the good sense Gygax gave a bard.

Actually Kitten is about 14 mentally and physically so I think she would be closer Sarah and Elina's generation but we'll see what happens.

OOC: For your viewing pleasure, I give to you the anime rendition of a typical fight between members of the Second Generation as demonstrated by System of a Down and the BEST. AMV. EVER.
I'm sorry, I just couldn't watch that. That has to be the most seizure inducing thing I've ever seen. You know what, infact, have this.

:twitch: Award for most seizure inducing post.
rampant

04-16-07, 01:43 AM		OORampant - So is she just bigger or did you finally shell out for a decent mind's eye artist?
Kaizer_Ryu

04-16-07, 02:23 AM		Actually Kitten is about 14 mentally and physically so I think she would be closer Sarah and Elina's generation but we'll see what happens.I guess that'd measure up at least physically, though I'm not sure what passes for physical maturity when you're this (http://www.anime.com/Hello_Kitty/images/kitty-wallpaper.jpg). :D

:twitch: Award for most seizure inducing post.I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not. ;)

On a related note, I have to ask. Is it a bad thing when every time I put something new in my sig I'm forced to take out something else because of the character limit?
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-16-07, 09:02 AM		……In other words she thinks everyone is an idoit except for some of the people she knows.……
OOC: :dancin: Exactly.

OOcat: Including some of the E.B.N.E.s. :bored:

OOC: :mad:
Crystalforged

04-16-07, 11:20 AM		OORampant - So is she just bigger or did you finally shell out for a decent mind's eye artist?
What are you asking here? :confused:

I guess that'd measure up at least physically, though I'm not sure what passes for physical maturity when you're this (http://www.anime.com/Hello_Kitty/images/kitty-wallpaper.jpg). :D
Actually with all :censored: she's been through and the way here personality is now she would probably be significantly older than that mentally. Kinda like how Sarah and Elina are only 15 or so but certainly act significantly older than that.

As for the physical maturity bit... you raise a very good point. Honestly the only way I can think of quantifying that would require bringing silver into the equation and I don't wanna go there...
Kaizer_Ryu

04-16-07, 01:20 PM		Honestly the only way I can think of quantifying that would require bringing silver into the equation and I don't wanna go there...Sarah: :D I wanna go there!

OOKaizer: :nonono: You're fifteen.

Sarah: And a Wolf-girl.

OOKaizer: Which has nothing to do with childbearing age.

Sarah: :bigeyes: I want puppies!

OOKaizer: :mad: Look what you did.

OOCharles: :angel:

13: :angel:

Silver: :angel:

OOcat: :angel:

OORampant: :angel:

OOKaizer: It's not happening yet, young lady.

Sarah: :allalone: *goes back to the duel*

OOKaizer: You can stop hiding now.

Tirmek: :hides: Just try and make me.
Lord Kale Fangblade

04-16-07, 05:28 PM		Sithis kept up his defence from Sarahs attack, unlike her he didn't feel fatigue.

Sithis: (ihh) Keepers fangs. my offensive magic is useless against her with that armour functioning. Agálmarin wouldn't be able to completely destroy that powerful an item, but perhaps if i could land a proper blow...

Sithis draws on his lifewell, invigorating and strengthening himself. now easily parrying each of Sarah's attacks Sithis waited for his moment, seeing an opening he struck, his blade easily biting through the armour at one of her weak points, in this case her right armpit.

Sithis stepped back parrying the return blows, a small amount of blood glistening on the end of his blade. Though not life threatening the cut he'd scored had struck would not only be extremly difficult to heal even with her regenerative abilities but it would serve to slow her slightly and had struck a weak point in the armours magical flow causing it to be less effective, with a few more similar strikes Sithis would be able to temporarily disable the items magical defences.

Sithis parried another attack, but the second slipped through his defenses and slashed across his upper right arm, causing a small amount of too pale blood to stain Sithis's clothing.
Before Sarah could dart back Sithis managed to catch her with a retaliatory blow, this time striking at the back of her left knee. another deep wound rewarded Sithis with a further loosening of the Armours magic defences.

Sithis: (ihh) just one more strike and i'll be able to shut her defences down.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-17-07, 12:01 AM		Sithis could only grin at the thought that had gone into Sarah's armor. It was rare enough that she would plan ahead, but to design something that so uniquely suited her abilities and covered her greatest weakness was almost unheard of. Sithis thought of all the students watching this, knowing full well how they felt about a certain boy.

Sithis: (i.h.h.) Say what you will about Tirmek, she's a better warrior for it.

He continued to parry, waiting for his next opening. Still early in the fight, she was recovering somewhat faster than he anticipated, but the armor was not a regenerative object. Growing impatient, as he knew she would, Sarah's strikes became erratic. It was almost too easy...

He parried her first strike with his sword, pushing the gauntlet aside as he stepped back to avoid the second. Now, the Law of Humorous Cause and Effect being what it was (talking bad about someone will inevitably cause them to show up behind you at the worst possible moment), it made sense that a similar Law existed for serious situations. The sudden, excruciating pain in the shoulder of his sword arm made this abundantly clear. Normally his reach was almost a foot longer than hers due to his larger stature, but the furry arm buried in his shoulder showed a successful partial-transformation in action. The wound burned intensely as the gauntlet now fused into her lycanthropic form glowed with Holy light. The pain caused him to lose sensation in his arm for the briefest of moments before he pulled away, but that was all it took for him to drop his sword.

Free to attack at last, Sarah opened up on him, trying to pound him into submission before he could regroup. She was only partially successful, as he was still slightly faster after the leg wound he had given her.

Sithis: *dodging* (i.h.h.: I hate it when-) *CRACK* (Agh! -she uses-) *CRUNCH* (Ugh! -strategy!) *THUNK*

Despite his efforts, she was succeeding in one of her secondary goals: driving him away from his sword. Without that, he would have an incredibly hard time disabling her armor, and almost no chance of getting past her defenses with his spells. She hadn't even raged yet and he was in deep trouble. He wasn't sure why she had so far refrained, but he could only surmise she wanted to enact her plan before dipping into her inner fury.

Sithis: (i.h.h.) Only one way out of this...

Sarah's next strike passed through him as he dissolved into a swarm of bats yet again. She did manage to clip one, sending the poor creature spiraling out of control down the steps.

Sarah: GRRRRRRRR!!!!!!

She immediately turned to race towards the sword, diving for it with her jaws like a puppy chasing a stick, only to eat floor as Sithis grabbed it. His sword arm still burned from the wound she had landed, so he was forced to use his other (and weaker) arm. Still, with his weapon back in hand he had a chance to regain his advantage. He raised his sword to finish weakening her armor's defenses as she recovered from the crash, but promtly fell over.

Sithis: What in the name of the Dark S-? Oh, for the love of :censored:!

The bat that Sarah had sent for a loop tipsily made its way back to Sithis and rejoined him to complete his foot.

OOC: Little thing about Sarah's armor. Each piece will function independantly, just not as well. It passively feeds off Sarah's life force, drawing enough power from her shadow abilities to counter any magical threat. In Final Fantasy terms, it means if Sithis manages to disrupt the flow between pieces enough, it'd be like going from Reflect to Shell.
rampant

04-17-07, 01:30 AM		Tirmek - *in a cheerleader out fit* Sarah Sarah She's the best
Gonna gut that little pest

Ketty - :twitch:

Sarah - :drool:

Sithis - I feel unloved.

Xiath - goo *waves a half-eaten pennant with a bat sigil on it*

Sithis - Ok now I feel better.
Lord Kale Fangblade

04-17-07, 12:11 PM		Sithis: (ihh) damn it. my life well doesnt contain enough energy to keep this up for much longer . * Parries one of Sarahs attacks and stumbles back wards* I dont even have enough energy to fix my wounds.

Sithis barley parries the second blow but is too slow to stop the third blow from landing. it grated across his breast plate, leaving deep grooves in the armour but not managing to pierce it.

Sithis: (ihh) i cant cast any spells that require material components , and a stone skin spell would be soooo useful right now, seeing as i lost my spell components pouch back there. i cant use offensive spells against her with her armours shielding capabilities still entact, mist would hamper us both, darkness wouldnt do a thing. This has been very well thought through.

Sithis is vanishes and then reappears behind sarah, landing a blow on her back before she managed to turn around. smiling as he felt the flow in her armour disrupt. now that he'd managed to land a proper blow, he saw that it was feeding of her life force rather than being powered by resdual enchantments.

Sithis cursed mentally, instead of parrying her attacks this time, he activated the bracelet on his left hand, creating a shield of energy that managed to block her blows for a few second.

Sithis: (ihh) She's won, i cant cast with her constant attack and lack of spell components. i cant disrupt her protection without more time, my lifewell ( store of energy) is running dry. im too wounded to heal fast enough. Im not going out without a fight though...

Sithis draw on everything that left within his life well. invigorating himself even more than normal. blurring as he moved Sithis grabbed Sarahs arm as she attacked with his wounded right. his unyielding strenght opening creating just a brief enough opportunity for him to bring the pommel of his sword into her face with every last ounce of his remaining strength.

the instant after he deliverd the blow, all of Sithis's enhancements to strenght and speed stoped. his eyes became pale blue again. and his skin lost the lustre of lifewell energy.

OOC: Sarah can strike the final blow now Kiazer.
rwarner3701

04-17-07, 03:34 PM		OORwarner: I’m back!

Darian Saito: No, you aren’t.

OORwarner: Sure I am, I just caught up to the current page and I’m making a post.

Darian: Yeah that’s worked out real well in the past.

OORwarner: Hey, I tried and you got some use out of it. Besides, aren’t you supposed to worship me?

Darian: I worship the E.B.N.E as a whole you just rank fairly low.

OORwarner: What do you mean?

Darian: Well, Charles is like the Zeus from your Greek myths, and most of the frequent posters are like some combination of the other gods.

OORwarner: So where do I rank?

Darian: You could be like a half god.

OORwarner: Awesome, like Hercules?

Darian: …well not exactly, but sure lets pretend.

OORwarner: So why don’t you think I can post more?

Darian: Well, its getting close to the end of the school year and you have projects to work on.

OORwarner: Yeah, but while I procrastinate I can work on this.

Darian: That and you don’t have any of your own characters.

OORwarner: I could introduce one, and maybe get permission to use some of the others, like last time.

Darian: I suppose, you could always use Hermes to ask the other E.B.N.E. about their characters.

OORwarner: Who is Hermes?

Darian: You know, messenger god, I think you call him PM.

OORwarner: Wait the message server is a god and I’m not?

Darian: Well it is an essential part of the plots; you know the well developed ones.

OORwarner: Just for that I think I am going to make a character so you won’t get used any more.

Darian: Sure you will.

OORwarner: I will! Although it could take a few weeks like until school gets out.

Darian: That’s what I thought.

OOC:

By the way, awesome work on all the pages I never managed to comment on.
rampant

04-17-07, 03:55 PM		OORampant - Interesting, I wonder what that makes me?

Darian - The lord and master of power creep.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-17-07, 09:04 PM		OOC: :heehee: rawarner!

OOKaizer: If he's Powercreep, that would make me...

Darian: The Drama Queen.

OOKaizer: :weep:

Darian: Goddess of Sensuality, Heartbreak, and Romance.

OOKaizer: :( But...but...I'm a guy...

Darian: Not according to your track record.

Terra: :P See? I told you this would happen.

OOKaizer: :raincloud :allalone:

-----

Sarah: *grabs her face* OW!

*SMASH*

Sithis crumpled under her strike, having burned himself out. He hit the ground hard, and Sarah actually felt a bit guilty for hitting him so hard.

Sarah: Wait a minute... *VICTORY POSE* Yata! :D

Sarah wins.

Sarah: *helps Sithis up* (i.h.h.) Ok, I SOMEHOW managed that without raging, but I had to transform a bit. He really did a number on my armor, too. Teiza and Momo are either going to be happy it stood up so well or mad I got it damaged so much. Not that it'll help much against Tirmek...
rampant

04-17-07, 09:39 PM		Tirmek - I'm half-tempted to throw in the towel, she's just barely been scratched, and I've been through the wringer....:weep: I DON'T WANT TO DIE!

Elina - More likely she'd *whisper*

Tirmek - :weep: I WANT TO DIE!
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-17-07, 09:57 PM		Elina - More likely she'd *whisper*

Tirmek - :weep: I WANT TO DIE!
Silver and Bunny are locked in a physical struggle.

Silver: LET GO OF HIM!

Bunny: Nobody gets to escape death.

Silver: YOUR GOING TO EXPERIENCE THAT FACT IN A MINUTE!

OOcat: I'm the god of "Chill, dude." :D
Kaizer_Ryu

04-17-07, 11:35 PM		Tirmek - :weep: I WANT TO DIE!
Elina: It's not as bad as you think. She exhausted herself pretty good in that battle. Putting enough energy into outlasting Sithis like that will drain anyone.

Tirmek: I think I may know the answer already, but just to make sure...why are you trying to cheer me up?

Elina: Because if she wins too easily I'll never hear the end of it. If she wins decisively, I'll never hear the end of it. If she loses by any measure, she'll be upset but we can pawn her off on you for the consolement.

Tirmek: :mad:

Elina: If she wins by a thread she'll be...er...happy but not overconfident enough to have to beat on.

Tirmek: :bored: Should I be worried about that pause?

Elina: :angelhide:

OOC: On a side note, these (http://www.nuklearpower.com/daily.php?date=070412) two (http://www.nuklearpower.com/daily.php?date=070417) 8-bit strips only serve to reinforce that Nalfein is in fact Black Mage's less perverted Alternate. Not much else has changed. :D
rampant

04-18-07, 01:18 AM		The final battle is set in a feild full of floating platforms, each making different courses through the arena, each also fades into and out of various planes of existance in random patterns and combinations, example one may be a small cirlce in the shadow realm and a large triangle in the material realm, then become a tiny square on the astral plane.

Tirmek - Aw fug!

Sarah - My head hurts just looking at it.

Teiza - soo dizzy
ratslinky

04-18-07, 07:20 AM		Gaz: Damn I would be so good at this arena us natural plane shifters aren't so affected by it
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-18-07, 10:32 AM		Sarah - My head hurts just looking at it.
Satnak: This course was submitted on our battle forum by "extramoonnumber". (;))
rampant

04-18-07, 11:29 AM		Sarah leaps from her platform to Tirmek's getting nothing but a face full of flat surface as the platform moves into the shadow plane completely and Tirmek slips through.

Tirmek - Ouch! My Clavin!

Saraj - I fit by ounge
Crystalforged

04-18-07, 11:47 AM		Kitten is asleep in her room, which, rather embarrassingly is covered with numerous images of herself. (Kanatash did the interior decorating while she was away) Suddenly she lets out a screem and sits straight up in bed covered in a cold sweat.

Kitten: (panting) Just a dream, just a dream.

Kanatash: (rising out of Kitten's bed) Nightmares honey? Do I need to go kick the **** out of the Quori for you?

Kitten: No mom, its fine. It was just a bad dream. Reaally, its nothing to worry about.

Kanatash: (holding Kitten's hand) Has this been happening a lot?

Kitten: Well... kinda... ever since I came back from dad's home dimension.

Kanatash: I though as much. I used to have a similar problem when I was younger. Let me tell you a story...

http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/310209 (click "watch this video")

Kitten: :uh-huh: Uh, ok. So you're saying I need to face my fears?

Kanatash: Nah, the lesson is, massive ammounts of violence solves any problem.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-18-07, 04:10 PM		Kanatash: …the lesson is, massive ammounts of violence solves any problem.
Bunny: It does at that.
rampant

04-19-07, 01:18 AM		Bunny: It does at that.

Satnak and Ketty - AMEN!
----------------------------------

Tirmek - Um so hows things?

Sarah - Oh yeah I just got you this adorable little two piece

*SMACK*

Sarah - What the hell was that for?

Tirmek - When Was the last time I ever fought fair?

*Smack*

Sarah - That's getting old

*Smack*

Sarah - I think your hammer's glitchy or something.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-19-07, 09:08 AM		Tirmek - When Was the last time I ever fought fair?
Silver: Oh, ho ho hooooooooo…………:shifty:

Tirmek: :uh-huh:…………Is there any way to get her to stop?

Bunny: Well, we could fix your future.

Tirmek: Really? :D

13: Emphasis on the "fix" part.

Trimek: Huh…………………:eek:
rampant

04-19-07, 09:05 PM		Tirmek brings his hammer around in a sweeping arc, only to be stopped by Sarah's grip on the weapons haft.

Tirmek - :eek:
Kaizer_Ryu

04-19-07, 09:17 PM		13: Emphasis on the "fix" part.

Trimek: Huh…………………:eek:
Sarah: As if that will stop me. :plotting:

Tirmek: :bored: See what I have to deal with?

Sarah: You realize once we've recovered from this, regardless of who wins, we're going somewhere nice at Vedris' expense, right?

Tirmek: That's what frightens me...

*CRACK*

Tirmek: OW!

Sarah: So let's get this over with.

OOC: Sorry I didn't keep going with this yesterday, I was pretty swamped.

BTW, rampant, I'm still a bit confused as to how the arena functions.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-19-07, 09:32 PM		OOC: ……BTW, rampant, I'm still a bit confused as to how the arena functions.
OOC: I think I've got it: a bunch of floating platforms that phase between various planes, possibly changing shape as they do.

OOcat: Advantage of having 13 in our head is getting good at understanding the weird stuff. :D

13: :mad:
rampant

04-19-07, 10:50 PM		OOC: Thanks for clearing that one up Silvercat!
---------------------------

Tirmek's fur begins smoking.

Tirmek - *sniffsniff* What's cooking? smells good

Sarah - I'd say delicious.

Tirmek - Oh god's It BURRRRRRRRNS!

Sarah - Not that I'm complaining, but huh?

Vedris is in the stands *Glaring at Tirmek*

Tirmek - WATER!
Kaizer_Ryu

04-19-07, 11:39 PM		Elina: *GLARE*

Vedris: *bursts into flame* AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!

Elina: Leave them alone already!

Vedris: *cough*

Bezen: *points at Vedris* Ha-ha!

Elina: While Tirmek's busy, I get alone time with Lilly! :cloud9:

Bezen: Ugh. Why do you like that Spoony weirdo, anyway?

Elina: *GLARE*

Bezen: *bursts into flame* AAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!

Sagas: *anime sweatdrop* *decides to remain silent*
rampant

04-20-07, 12:03 AM		Tirmek lunges forward, using momentum and Surprise to force Sarah back despite her superior strength. She retaliates by flinging him up and over, with one hand, and slamming him into a platform. The platform shifts into the ethereal and drops Tirmek into a well timed kick.

OOC: Just beat on him a bit... alot actually.

Tirmek - Hey!

OORampant - Its Sarah, you know you enjoy it.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-20-07, 12:42 AM		Tirmek landed on the platform below, followed closely by Sarah catching him in the chest with her own kick. The belt sent him towards another platform, on to which he grabbed the edge. He made to flip onto it, but at the last moment flipped himself to a different platform, in the process dodging Sarah's winged onslaught. She quickly caught up to him, though, and would have sent him face first into this platform as well had it not passed into the Astral Plane. He braced himself for the immediate resumption of her assault, but Sarah landed on another platform.

Sarah: (i.h.h.) I have the advantage in maneuverability here, but... *leans on her knees for a moment* ...I guess I'm more exhausted than I thought. Seems I was right not to rage before now. I might not have been able to stand.

With a howl Tirmek knew all too well, Sarah shifted to hybrid form as she dipped into her ingrained fury and battle lust. She came at him with renewed vigor, completely ignoring the shockwave from his hammer as she began a rather painful (for Tirmek) mid-air combo. Try as he might, Tirmek just couldn't seem to avoid more than one strike at a time and could counter even less. He was saved only by a nearby platform passing through Kythri and transforming into a velvet paisley-covered Chesterfield sofa (please tell me someone gets this :bigeyes: ), which Sarah felt an uncontrollable urge to jump up and lie down on while wagging her tail.
rampant

04-20-07, 01:49 AM		OORampant - :nonono: You call that a beating?!

Sarah lifts the couch and proceeds to knock Tirmek about the arena with it.

Sarah - (i.h.h. it doesn't matter what his plan is if he never gets to implememnt it)

Tirmek - (i.h.h. note to self, MAIM E.B.N.E.)
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-20-07, 08:59 AM		……a velvet paisley-covered Chesterfield sofa (please tell me someone gets this :bigeyes: )……
OOC: Just guessing: Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy?
Kaizer_Ryu

04-20-07, 11:07 AM		OOC: Just guessing: Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy?OOC: Yay!

The Chesterfield sofa in question is the one that appeared out of the floatsam and jetsam of space-time on Old Earth that Ford and Arthur used to get back to the present day.

IC:

Sarah: (i.h.h.) Wow, this is actually pretty useful as a weapon.

FX Demon: *POW!* *SMACK!* *BIFF!*

To all observers, the words appear in splashes across the screen.

-----

Jarlot: I sense a great disturbance. As if someone were using my schtick, despite the fact that I'm not Batman...

-----

The couch eventually breaks as Sarah whacks Tirmek over the head with it, sticking him through the cushions in the process.

OOC: Don't end it just yet. I've still got something I want to do, but I don't have enough time right now.
rampant

04-20-07, 11:56 AM		Tirmek starts spinning within the sofa, turning it and himself into a top-like weapon and regain some lost ground as Sarah fails to dodge the first rush and is pummemeld by upholstry.

13 - Revenge of the furniture

Tirmek drops the sofa and takes to the skies with his pegasus meld. Sarah follows only to get grabbed by the scruff of the neck and pulled with Tirmek as he dives through a platform. This particular platform had just shifted to the shadow plane and thus was solid to Sarah, but not to Tirmek.

CRACK

Sarah regains an upright position and scampers to a new platform just as the one she was on added a fire element to itself.

Sarah - WHEN I FIND WHOEVER BUILT THESE DAMNED THINGS!

Momo, Illis, Marenth - :hides:
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-20-07, 05:40 PM		Bunny: So bored. :bored:

OOcat: Well someone's going to die.
*********
Back in the Forgotten Realms……

Elminster: Maybe I was too hasty going to another world.

Bunny: Okay, according to the sheet you're waaaaaayyyyyyyyy overdue.
*********
"Death is once, but taxes are forever. Just means I get bored easily."—Bunny
rampant

04-20-07, 08:22 PM		Tirmek - (i.h.h. this is not going well)

Sarah rushes tirmek with deadly intent.

Tirmek - Hmmm nice try. Here's a new trick.

Tirmek slashes the air with his claws and blades of energy rip a line through the earth revealing a burrowed Sarah, when the blades impact the shadow duplicate fizzles out.

Tirmek - Ha!

This time Tirmek swings his hammer in a horizontal arc and the effect is a single large wave.

Sarah - meep

THe wave impacts the young suferot, and explodes just like the impact of his hammer.

Sarah - owies
Kaizer_Ryu

04-20-07, 10:18 PM		Bunny: So bored.
OOC: Almost done, I swear. :)

IC:

With his string of luck with the platforms so far, it was only natural that SOMEONE-

13: :angel:

-would turn it back on him.

Tirmek: :gel: :mad: H-h-h-h-hate R-R-R-Risia.

*SMASH*

Sarah sent the half-frozen boy through the platform, shattering the whole thing in the process. She followed him through the debris, cutting him off as he dodged a VERY comfy looking bed (platform + Dal Quor). The broken platform, meanwhile, reformed into a dreaded Rules Lawyer as it connected to Daanvi.

Rules Lawyer: *looks around* :uh-huh: *notices all the egregious violations throughout the entire thread* :blink: :twitch: :shocked: :banghead: :tantrum: ... :surrender

*KABOOOOOOOOOOMMMM!!!!!*

Striking with his hammer, Tirmek landed a rather nasty blow to the ribs, but Sarah grabbed the offending weapon and tore it from his hands. She then proceeded to beat him over the head with it before dropping it and continuing with her own paws. The two landed on a platform as it connected to Thelanis. To them only moments passed, but to the outside it was at least ten minutes. The slow motion duel seemed all the more painful, letting all involved actually see what they were doing to each other. Including that kiss Sarah planted on Tirmek's nose after socking him in the gut.

Vedris: :headexplo

Eventually, Tirmek caught Sarah's feet, knocking her off the platform as it shifted to Lammania.

Tirmek: (i.h.h.) Seems Elina was right. Even transformed she only hits as hard as normal. The claws still hurt like hell, but if I keep this up she might just drop...

Sarah had the bad luck to land on a platform just as it shifted to Dolurrh. That planes lethargic effect only served to slow her down further.

Sarah: (i.h.h.) Mom dammit! What does this place have against me?!

13: *whistles non-chalantly*

Sarah: (i.h.h.) Gotta finish this... I've already lost my rage, and-

Fury: :devil: Having a bit of trouble, sweetie?

Sarah: :censored:! Just what I didn't need right now. Go away.

Fury: But I'm BORED! Shadow's gone, the Host has had that "out to lunch" sign on their door for the longest time, Traveler's busy tormenting some humans with bugzappers with his marshmallow golem, Mockery is trying to get Keeper to give him back all his stuff before he sells it to a novelty shop, and Daddy's been on a "physician prescribed" vacation due to extreme stress for some reason, so I've missed "play time" again and I've got no one to massacre for it!

Sarah: Not my problem. Oh, and ew.

Fury: But it is.

Sarah once again felt the rush of losing herself to the passion of battle. Her silver wings turned blood red and became almost dragon-like in appearance.

Tirmek: :eek: Not good!

Sarah: RRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIISSSSAAAAAIII DD NO!

The rage remained, but her wings returned to normal as the Fury failed in her hijacking.

Fury: *anime pout* You're no fun.

OOC: Ok, I'm satisfied. You can finish this up when you want, rampant.
rampant

04-20-07, 10:50 PM		Tirmek - That's it I'm not fighting that! I'd like to live to see tomorrow.

Sarah - So you're giving up, awwwwww

Tirmek - *astral construct*

A grey hooded ninja appears in front of Sarah

Sarah - CHEW TOY!

Astral construct - SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEK

As Sarah tears into the construct Tirmek pounces.

Tirmek hauls her up by the scruff of the neck and lets go, keeping her suspended with the remnants of the astral construct. He brings forth a Warhammer and a greatsword tearing into Sarah with fierce precision. As he continues the combination his speed increases as he activates his remaining martial manuever, he only had a little time to finish this before the platforms intervened, and he didn't have the power to keep trading blows with Sarah. So he poured his last maneuver and all of his remaining power points into this one volley, the soulmelds along his body glowed as he hit the turbo setting, and finally after a gutwrenching stab through Sarah that obliterated the construct Tirmek fell to his knees. While Sarah collapsed backwards.

Tirmek wins, now get the boy to the infirmary! No just leave her there she'll be fine in a minute.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-21-07, 12:48 AM		No just leave her there she'll be fine in a minute.OOC: :heehee

Sarah: :mad: I hate you.

-----

Momo: Wow, Sithis really knows his stuff. Even I didn't see that weakness.

Teiza: Jerk...damaging my work...mumble...grumble...

The two stand next to Sarah's damaged armor. She had removed it prior to her duel with Tirmek and asked if they could mitigate the effects of the stamina drain.

Teiza: I hate to do this, but we're gonna have to tone it down a bit. It's the reaction to area effect spells that's really getting her.

Momo: :( :bigeyes: But I don't wanna make it weaker!

Teiza: Face it, some times it's just not worth the effort or price. Your sister fights in melee, concentrating on one opponent at a time. It's the single-target and status-effect stuff she's got to worry about. Focus on what they need first, then add the bells and whistles.

Momo: Awwww...but I like bells...

OOC: And Kithle is Thief (http://www.nuklearpower.com/daily.php?date=070421) for Always and Eternity.
rampant

04-21-07, 01:16 AM		Tirmek - On the hand I won, on the other...well the other hand just doesn't work.

Xiath - Goo

Tirmek - As soon as my ribs heal You're moving out of my winnings.

Xiath - (sitting in the mound of crystals that constitute the Tournament prize) :P
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-21-07, 07:32 AM		Xiath - (sitting in the mound of crystals that constitute the Tournament prize) :P
Tirmek: Gods d*mnit!

13: Yes, yes we do. All of it.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-21-07, 09:01 AM		Roy is in his office (surprisingly it’s still the same sparse military office he had back before he was Fürher) cleaning the windows with breath and a rag with his jacket tied around his waste. Rina walks in with a small pile of papers under one arm.

Rina: Sir, I need you to sign these.

Roy: *sigh* (gets down and gets out a pen)

Rina: Sign here……initial here……here…and here……and sign here.

Roy: What am I signing?

Rina: That’s your signature to show that you initialed when you should have signed.

Roy: If I had known being the Fürher was going to involve this much paperwork I wouldn’t have killed all those members of the royal family.

Rina: Sir, they were elves and vampires. The snobbishness/angst would have led to a revolt sooner or later.

Roy: Speaking of elves, how’s our armistice with the Valenar going?

Rina: I’m afraid to report that there was a raid on Gatherhome two days ago, and some units are still in the area. Preliminary reports suggest that Valenar did this in retaliation for sending them “a Spoon of mass distruction”.

Roy: Clever, mister Galan. Very clever. Turning my punishment back against me. Ready a peacekeeping force. Drum up a bunch of new conscripts.

Rina: Sir, I’ll inform General—

Roy: No, no, I’ll be dealing with this personally.

Rina: Sir?

Roy: My family is from that region. They settled there back when it was just a bunch of one-street towns and lawlessness ran rampant. They were some of the first lawmen there.

Rina: Really, sir? You don’t talk about your past much.

Roy: It all has to do with an ancestor of mine: Jim, a member of the Royal Guards back in Galifarian times. Jim West, they called him. Nicknamed him “Mustang”, which is why everyone thinks it’s my family name.

Rina: I always thought you’d just chosen it as an alias, like Galan did with Elric.

Roy: No, there’s a proud history to that moniker. (Roy takes out an old photo, which shows a guy who looks a lot like him dressed in cowboy clothes standing next to another guy, this one in a cowboy hat but with more of a suit on, who looks remarkably like Ketler) That’s his partner, Gordon, a rogue scion of Cannith. Brilliant gadget guy; master of disguise; all-around genius. Was a bit of a klutz with the ladies…
*********
Ketler: ACHOO!
*********
Rina: But weren’t the Royal Guards the personal protection of the king?

Roy: For some reason that particular monarch spent a lot of time in the Talenta Plains and what’s now Valenar. Which is twice as stupid when you consider that there was this dwarf madman named Girlless who was always trying to capture him. (Roy takes out a piece of parchment this time, a wanted poster showing a short man that obviously looks like Lilly)

Rina: Sir, with all due respect, I don’t buy it.

Roy: Then maybe a music video will convince you……

Story of Jim "Mustang West" Paladinmount (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bBiOfJdh_9Q)
Kaizer_Ryu

04-21-07, 08:25 PM		Sarah lies cuddled up to Tirmek, both fast asleep, with her head under his chin and her arms wrapped around him. Though her wounds have healed, they took significantly longer to do so due to the volume of energy she expended during the tournament. Xiath lies asleep in Tirmek's winnings nearby.

Ketty: This is just too precious.

Terra: Honestly, I never saw near-mortal combat as a form of flirting till after you and Feal-thas. Must run in the family.

Ketty: :rolleyes: And no flirting opportunity wasted seems to run in yours.

Terra: :D
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-21-07, 09:50 PM		Silver: I………may actually need a vacation.

Terra: Can you do that?

Silver: Nothing is impossible when it comes to not existing.

Ketty: Wait…if you're not around that means no flirting, no ear-burning crushes, no :pile:.

Silver: Yeah, pretty much.

Female Significant Others: :eek: NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Male Significant Others: Yay!

F.S.O.: *GLARE OF OBEDIENCE WITHOUT PHYSICAL WHIPS!*

M.S.O.: :ghosted:

Single Men:……………………And yet we still seek it.

13: :D Our functions overlap a bit.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-21-07, 10:17 PM		Tirmek: This could be the best thing that happened to me in a while.

Sarah: :bigeyes:

Tirmek: Not that I mind your attraction. I enjoy it quite a lot. It just that...

Terra: She's got that look in her eye.

Tirmek: Precisely.

Sarah: :blush: MOM!

Terra: :rolleyes: Believe it or not, I was your age once. And maybe this will help my voluntary celibacy not be so hard to tolerate...

Sarah: Hmm?

Terra: Nothing.

Motoko: You know, since you're no longer married, you're "back on the market" so to speak.

Terra: :mad: Would you stop trying to hook me up already?

Motoko: Oh, come on. The last one was a fluke.

Terra: You set me up with Mystra!

Motoko: How was I supposed to know she was a royal b*tch?

All: :uh-huh:

Motoko: :bored: Fine. But the sooner you at least appear to be spoken for, the sooner the Odd Couple-

-----

Chanse & Ash: ACHOO!

-----

Motoko: -stop with the voyeristic schemes.
Charles Phipps

04-22-07, 12:33 AM		I salute the Roy Mustang and the unexpected Wild Wild West bit. That was absolutely delightful and gets a :laughs: from me. I loved it.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-22-07, 12:44 AM		OOC: I figure you're good to go with the 8-bit spoof now, Charles. Unless rampant has anything else to do with the wrap-up.
rampant

04-22-07, 01:37 AM		OOC: Nah I'm done. Lets take a look at how the guys have been doing since we left them unsupervised so long!

....

You know what I'll let you guys go first.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-22-07, 08:37 AM		I salute the Roy Mustang and the unexpected Wild Wild West bit. That was absolutely delightful and gets a :laughs: from me. I loved it.
OOC: I've got a stack of Youtube videos on my bookmarks menu, and I'm getting pretty close to having a joke for each one.
Lord Kale Fangblade

04-22-07, 08:39 AM		Naz'roth and Sithis stand in Naz'roths workshop going over Sithis's equipment.
Naz'roths runs a hand along the deep groves in Sithis's breast Plate.

Naz'roth: *whistle* That was an extremely close call. she missed the seal that keeps the elemental bound to your armor by almost a millimeter. any closer and the Greater Air elemental would have torn you apart as it broke free.

Sithis: *scowling* The match would have gone better if I had expected that armor. She caught me completely by surprise with that move.

Naz'roth: you put up a good fight though, made her expend energy she would need for the next match. You also practically destroyed that suit of armor.

Sithis: *smirk* Agálmarin was designed to destroy protective wards and magic items.

Naz'roth: Would you mind if I took a look at it? I’m rather interested to see the spells you placed on it.

Sithis unsheathed Agálmarin and passed it to Naz'roth. who turned away from the manikin that Sithis's armor was set on and Placed it on his work bench. He then removed a blue crystal from one of the draws and whispered a small word of power. It glowed with a faint blue radiance as Naz’roth passed it over Agálmarin. In the blue radiance a number of magical runes that glowed with blue light appeared.

Naz’roth: Hmmm… yes. I see now. You used Silver as the blades material because it holds complex spells better. The silver itself was magically lightened and strengthened before you forged it into the blade. The eberron Shard at the Pommel stores the main spell, the one that allows you to break down magical items or spells and absorb their energy. It also gives you a spell storing quality. * Turns back To Sithis* this is very well crafted. You obviously spent quite a bit of time and effort on this weapon. Where did you pick up the refining technique?

Sithis: My father was an Artificer, he worked a lot with Silver. He taught me most of my item crafting Techniques.

Naz’roth: *Hands Agálmarin back to Sithis* I’ll have your armor fixed in a about a day. As for your training. You need to pick up on combat techniques, if you get into a situation like that on the battle field you need to be able to hold your own without support.

Sithis: I was thinking of doing that anyway.

Naz’roth: Good. You don’t lack in strength or speed. Just technique. I’m also going to have to pay a little Visit Momo and Teiza, that armor was very good work for people of their age.

Sithis: I’ll inform them.

Naz’roth: It would be best if you did, Tara’s trying to stop me from dropping in unannounced. She said something along the lines of “ It’s impolite”, that and it tends to scare the Living Khyber out of them.

Sithis: I thought that was what you where aiming for?

Naz’roth: Exactly. But you know how Tara gets.

Both think for a moment, then Shudder, Sithis then vanishes in a cloud of bats.
luna18moon

04-22-07, 11:51 AM		Mittens: :hoppingma *stomping around angrily* WHO STOLE MY PLUSHIE????
Shred: :headexplo And my dagger!
Tear: :banghead: And one of my image crystals!
Slaypaw: Did you check with Scias yet?
Kittens: *in unison* Checked with him first.
Slaypaw:Where'd you look?
Mittens: *rattles off long list while Tear and Shred nod*
Slaypaw: So they're more neverfound items...
OOC: Seriously, some phantasmal presence keeps stealing my stuff. If they turn up, it's in weird, random places I didn't even touch when they vanished.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-22-07, 12:28 PM		OOC: Seriously, some phantasmal presence keeps stealing my stuff. If they turn up, it's in weird, random places I didn't even touch when they vanished.
13: Um……:shifty:……god-like pack rats. Yeah, that's it. (holding a huge pile of stuff behind back)
Kaizer_Ryu

04-22-07, 01:20 PM		OOC: Seriously, some phantasmal presence keeps stealing my stuff. If they turn up, it's in weird, random places I didn't even touch when they vanished.OOC: We've got the same problem here. We're convinced it's our recently deceased cat (R.I.P. :( ). She always liked messing with us, so now she takes our stuff and puts it in random places. We're sure it's her since Mom's the main target and this cat only had a begrudging respect for her. :D

IC:

Terra: GAH!

Motoko: :eek: :embarrass

Terra: :hoppingma HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU TO KNOCK FIRST?!

*one quick dressing later*

Terra: *angry pom* That's the fifth time in as many days. I'm beginning to think you're doing it on purpose.

Motoko: :bored: I don't know what you're so embarrased about. You've got an incredible figure, especially for someone who's had triplets.

Terra: :blush: ...now I'm not sure if I should thank you for the compliment or smite you for hitting on me.

Motoko: I'm not hitting on you. That was for you're next date.

Katrina (http://www.cvrpg.com/main.php?page=biokatrina): :mad: You said my date was a lecherous vampire with his soul restored by a sneezing gypsy.

Motoko: Meh. Lesbian Goddess with a tentacle fetish/lecherous soul-restored vampire...same difference.
dutchmason

04-22-07, 03:03 PM		OODutch: *Steps up from the audience onto the stage*

G.F.W (Guardian of the fourth wall): Hey you! You just cant step up through the fourth wall like that?

OODutch: What wall, its been shattered so many times its more like a small pile of rubble or a demilitirized zone no one cares about.

G.F.W.: No! My precious! *Runs off in tears*

OODutch: Well now that thats done allow me to present the latest member of the everevolving crew of the FF.

........................................ ........................................ ....

Benedick Proximo: Human commoner 2/survivor 6

Well what to say, where to start. Benedick is no new member of the Crew, he grew up on the FF and he is not alone in that but his circumstances are unique. He was born in the bowels, the very bowels! Of the Forgotten Freedom to the only female redshirt to ever survive pregnancy and the only male to ever survive walking into anyones cabin. He grew up there and learned almost all he knows from old discarded third edition sourcebooks. It was from one of these, Savage Species where he got his inspiration. It was a five level prestige class with no bab that someone had penciled a sixth level into... it had nothing other than one ability.... Don't Die. Taking this to heart Benedick has grown to be the embodiement of what all red-shirts want, survival. He is their last hope and their worst chance since despite being almost incincible he is also unable to harm anyone, let alone the crews Ubers. In any case he has finally emerged from the area the Redshirts call the Belowdecks into the light.

........................................ ........................................ ....
OODutch: *rushes back with a mug of coffee* Oh.. here I am! And here for the first time introducing the first, non-furry, non-lesbian, non-uber powerful, non-anime inspired member of the crew!
(Cues music from the Price is Right)
Benedick:*Steps out and trips, pulling the cord out and cutting of the music. He curses and stands* Right then! On with the show!

Cue Reality
........................................ ........................................ ....

Peace Out.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-22-07, 05:27 PM		Motoko: I'm not hitting on you. That was for you're next date.

Katrina (http://www.cvrpg.com/main.php?page=biokatrina): :mad: You said my date was a lecherous vampire with his soul restored by a sneezing gypsy.
Silver: The princess is the—wait, not allowed to reveal plot twists. Besides, that comic doesn't have enough characters to draw from.

13: Alec (http://www.cvrpg.com/main.php?page=bioalec)'s pretty feminine.

Silver: Bishonen-syndrome. Doesn't count.

(OOC: CVRPG rocks.)
Cue Reality
OOcat: Cue what? :confused:
dutchmason

04-22-07, 05:40 PM		Relative Reality
Kaizer_Ryu

04-22-07, 06:02 PM		(OOC: CVRPG rocks.)
OOC: Yes. Yes it does. :D

And welcome to the madness, dutchmason.
dutchmason

04-22-07, 06:16 PM		OODutch: Thanks...it has such pretty colors.
And now an act of initiation every crew member should undergo.
........................................ ........................................ .......................................
Benedick is wandering the deck trying to avoid most of the other crew when he hears a voice from the shadows.

Shady Voice: Psssst. Pssssst! Hey you, in the red shirt! I got something for you!

Benedick looks around then walks over to the edge of the deck where the voice is coming from.

Benedick: Ummmmm, hello?

Shady Voice: Hey I got something for you. Do you want a world with way too many gods, adventurers who will always outclass you, and too many people who know everything about it?

Benedick: *Looks puzzled and replies* Ummm... no. Hey haven't I heard of you? Aren't you L-something? El Muppet? El ummm---

Elminster: Foolish mortal! I am the all poweful old mage Elmister!

Elminster thrusts his staff forward and a thin green beam shoots out towards Benedick!

Benedick We just met!

Benedick dives under the ray and grabs a bucket full of water. He hurls it Elminster and takes cover.

Elminster: You fool! I'm melting...melting!....meltim-grblblerheshsdfg....

Benedick stands up and sees the pool of Old Mage.

Benedick: That could've gone better.

He shrugs and takes a mop and starts to clean up.

........................................ ........................................ ........................................
Old habits die hard.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-22-07, 06:54 PM		OOC: I'd feel sorry for him, since we've done this to him like 7 times, but in some ways he deserves it for being so über.

What about Dr'zzt you ask?

He suffers from fanboys. :P

(Also, anyone who likes CVRPG should check out Dan and Mab's Furry Adventures.)
dutchmason

04-22-07, 06:59 PM		OOC: I'd feel sorry for him, since we've done this to him like 7 times, but in some ways he deserves it for being so über.

What about Dr'zzt you ask?

He suffers from fanboys. :P

(Also, anyone who likes CVRPG should check out Dan and Mab's Furry Adventures.)

OODutch: His time to will come! MUWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-klorf-ech- I'm chokeing!

I'm better now, I can't spell but I'm better. (Recue Laughter)
rampant

04-22-07, 07:16 PM		Lol dutch
rampant

04-23-07, 02:13 AM		OORampant - Anyone out there?

....

...

...

...

Well now what, the normal response would be to go crazy, but thats no big deal... I'm gonna go make a sammich.
Charles Phipps

04-23-07, 02:28 AM		After the Mighty Battles have all been concluded

Lilly: Where the hell have you guys been?

Tirmek: You wouldn't believe us if we told you.

Sarah: :angry pomm:

Lilly: What was that for?

Tirmek: She's just enjoying her new emote method.

Dandelion: Okay, Lilly, that'll be 403 Gold Pieces for the services rendered.

*Dandelion pulls out some Listerine and starts gargling*

Elina: What have you been doing?

Lilly: My word as a paladin, nothing that will get a girl pregnant!

Tirmek: UGH!

Lilly: Okay, here's my plan. We summon a adult Sarah from the future...

http://www.beaucoupkevin.com/images/jennysparks1.jpg

Elina: Sarah is British?

Lilly: What? You think that E stands for France!?

Tirmek: You've also been reading your comic book collection, haven't you?

Lilly: You were gone a real long time!

Mithis: Hey Lilly! My boyfriend!

Elina: Who the hell is that!?

Lilly: YOU WERE GONE A REAL *LONG* TIME!

Hours Later

Lilly: And that's my plan.

Tirmek: Zzzzzzzz.

Sarah: Mmmmmmm dognip.

*plays around in it*

Elina: Wow! That was really interesting and explained all the questionable seeming things you were doing!

Lilly: So, all in favor, raise your hand!

*Elina and Lilly raise their hands*

Lilly: Opposed?

*Tirmek continues to sleep and Sarah is still strung out*

Lilly: Okay, motion carried and now enforced by the OMNIPOTENT SARDA!

*Unbreakable Geas is laid on the heroes to complete their quest*

Tirmek: Wha? Huh?

Lilly: WE MUST RETRIEVE THE FOUR ORBS OF LIGHT FOR KING STEVE!

Tirmek: OH HELLLLLLLLLL NO!
rampant

04-23-07, 02:36 AM		Tirmek - Ok I've tried everything I know, and few things i didn't, on the geas, its unbreakable. Let's see about this Sarda character.

Later

Tirmek - Yeah he's pretty damned unbreakable. my poor spleen

Lily - So who wants to be the artillery, the leader, the meat-sheild, or the planner.

Tirmek - HURT LILY!
Kaizer_Ryu

04-23-07, 02:59 AM		OOC: I should mention I added a bit to the wiki entries for Terra's youngest.

And both Charles and urial are slacking on their characters entries. :P :D

I might as well keep this moving, too.

IC:

Terra: :mad: *coughs up smoke*

Motoko: So she has spell control issues. One theatre going up in flames around you is not reason enough to refuse a second date.

Terra: I liked that dress. And I still can't figure out how you got me to go in the first place.

*DIETY GRAPPLE*

Terra: *pinned* Oh yeah... *Motoko lets her up* Ok, next question. Why are you so persistent about getting me back into a relationship?

Motoko: It's not good for you to be alone. We all saw that much in the Tiamat debacle.

Terra: I'm better now.

Motoko: The good Captain won't take me off diety-sitting till you, I, or someone else finds you a girl.

Terra: Since when is he his sister's keeper?

Motoko: I also get a nice bonus should I hook you up. Your brother doesn't seem to mind all the incompatabilities. Something about you reading too much into a relationship like this.

-----

Katrina: ;) Was it good for you?

Rose: :twitch: (i.h.h.: Why did I fail that Diplomacy check? I was so close! Just one little roll to get her back to non-furry hotness. The claws...THE CLAWS! DAMN MY NATURAL 20 SEDUCING ROLL!)

-----

Terra: I keep telling you I'm not ready for a relationship. It still feels like I'm cheating on her. And don't give me that "she's not here to find out" crap.

Motoko: Ok, fine. No relationships. Your heart is Lisa's now and forever. I get it. Since when did all intimate interaction have to involve commitment?

OOC: Yes, this is leading up to something. And it's probably what you think it is, too.
Charles Phipps

04-23-07, 03:01 AM		Tirmek: Well at least we know we don't have to all live through this quest.

Elina: Tirmek! You're not plotting to kill Lilly are you!?

Tirmek: Plotting? No. DOING? Yes.

*An armoir lands on Lilly*

Tirmek: And it was so ironic too!

*Lilly steps out of it*

Tirmek::OMG!

Sarah: What?

Tirmek: He's so stupid that he operates by Cartoon Physics!

Elina: Duh.

***

King Steve's Palace

King Steve: At last! I can meet you epic heroes spoken of in legend that delivered our land from the terrible evil of Mordain Fleshweaver 1000 years ago!

Lilly: Huh?

Sarah: King Steve, that was a month and a half ago.

King Steve: I assume you have the sacred orbs to prove you are the Chosen Ones?

Lilly: The what in the who now?

Tirmek: Okay, take these sacred orbs.

Lilly: Hey! NEAT ORBS!

Tirmek: Hey! You! Stop checking out my orbs, they're for Sarah not you.

Sarah: Be nice or I'll kick you in the orbs.

King Steve: But yes, whoever takes on this quest must have big brassy orbs.

Sarah: Well I do have the reputation as an orb buster when my man gets out of line.

Elina: I'm not sure we should take on this quest.

Lilly: What? You don't think I have the orbs for it?

Elina: Men! Why does everything revolve around your orbs?

Lilly: Well, unlike Tirmek, I have ORBS OF STEEL!

Sarah: Do we need just orbs?

Steve: Well, you also need a staff.

Lilly: My staff is quite adequate.

Elina: Oooo, you do have a nice staff.

Lilly: Really? You like it? I have a longer staff than Tirmek.

Tirmek: It's not how long your staff is but how you use it.

Elina: Let me go over and stroke that staff.

Sarah: You two get a room!

Tirmek: Bah, Lilly would just play with his staff alone.

Elsewhere

*Ivy watches the entire proceeding on a crystal ball while eating popcorn*

Ivy: Finally, fantasy that I can appreciate!
Kaizer_Ryu

04-23-07, 03:04 AM		Dandelion: Okay, Lilly, that'll be 403 Gold Pieces for the services rendered.

*Dandelion pulls out some Listerine and starts gargling*:nonono:

Mithis: Hey Lilly! My boyfriend!

Elina: Who the hell is that!?

Lilly: YOU WERE GONE A REAL *LONG* TIME!Wolf-girl fight?

*snip* The entire preceding scene *snip*:heehee

You've been sitting on that forever, haven't you?
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-23-07, 07:05 AM		:nonono:
Dandelion: I am insulted! To think that I would perform……such acts with that reprobate. Do you think if I did……:yuck:…what you think I did that I would gargle with simply Listerine? Khyber no! It would be something that could melt an ooze! I have to be a role-model for my son.

OOKazier: Then what were you doing?

Dandelion: Lilly made me promise never to reveal his secrets. I respect him for that.…………………Plus I'm holding it as blackmail. :shifty:
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-23-07, 09:05 AM		Dandelion, wearing the best clothes she’s got, steps into Erk’s Place.

She’d been in bars before, but she’d generally found they were seedy places where people went to drown themselves and full of men of the type that might not take “No” for an answer.

But this place was completely different: sure, the patrons were being rowdy, making bawdy jokes, and just generally letting it all loose, but some of them were women! And not all of them were humanoid either: mounds of stone, burbling cubes of gel, a unicorn, and at one table an angel, a tiger creature with backwards hands, and a large blue toad-like thing were all drinking together. Watching over this all was an unidentifiable beast with various horns, spikes, and a large shell upon its back. Some of the waitresses in evidence were a succubus and a ninja that looked remarkably like Pontiff Jaela. Orienting herself to the Forgotten Freedom had been quite weird, but this probably surpassed it.

No one accosted her as she approached the bar counter. Serving drinks was a slightly masculine-looking half-elf, while Dandelion could see in the back room a large bull head that must belong to the owner Erk.

Lucky (noticing Dandelion): What can I get you?

Dandelion: I’m here to see Erk.

The minotaur emerged from the back room just as his name was mentioned.

Erk: How can I help you?

Dandelion: I’ve been told you’re the one to come to about finding jobs around here.

Erk: You’ve got a pretty sweet deal staying with Ivy Galan. I shouldn’t think you’d need to work.

Dandelion: I don’t want to be dependant on someone. I’ve spent far too much of my life in that situation. And also I want to set a good example for my son. Otherwise he might grow up like his uncle.

Erk then smiled, which showed of carnivorous teeth yet was quite a warm grin.

Erk: Lacking the Spoony gene I doubt it would be that bad. Okay, Ms. Dandelion Tomas, what are your skills?

Dandelion: Um……er……to tell the truth—

Erk: You pretty much spent your life dependant and don’t have anything to show for it.

Dandelion: That’s not true! I have…(she looks over at the bar’s empty stage)…one talent.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-23-07, 09:32 AM		OOC: Just something I had to bring to your attention:

The Roy Mustang Isanity Test (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E-PL7wrtlgk&mode=related&search=)

I scored a whole 1/4 second. Go me!
dutchmason

04-23-07, 07:01 PM		At the same time somewhere in another part of the infinite bawdy area that makes up Erk's....

........................................ ........................................ ....

Benedick: *Wasted drunk* I mean...we'd only just met :weep:

Cool Cuthulu: Tragic dude...

Benedick: He was a dick and he tried to kill me but ... oh .... never mind.

Cool Cuthulu: Whatever...

Benedick: *To a waitress* Hit me baby one more time.

Mairilith in french maids outfit: Canned heat coming up.

Benedick: *Hic* Can you tell me the way to Rhukaan Draal?

Erk: Sure, you take the last train to Sterngate and they'll meet you at the station.

Benedick Let's Dance!

A dwarf, a halfling, a Brelander, a warforged, and a Valenar elf jump up and sing!

Pillage People: At the Y.M.S.A. (Young man's sovreigns association)!

A blue glowing inevitable teleports in...

Ca'P'wright: Denied! Resume shenanigans!

He leaves with the Pillage People in tow.

Benedick: You know Erk, you make me want to la la, in the kitchen on the floor...

Erk: I think you've had enough, take your drunk warforged friend and leave...

Benedick: Forged don't get drunk!

Hatchet: I'm a real boy! :streaks naked across the room:

........................................ ........................................ ....

Seriously the entire point of the reforging is booze!

Peace out.
ratslinky

04-23-07, 08:50 PM		OOC: All E.B.N.Es I have a serious problem I managed to go through whole Roy Mustang Insanity test without laughing what should I do?
Kaizer_Ryu

04-23-07, 09:22 PM		I scored a whole 1/4 second. Go me!OOC: Go me, too! :D

OOC: All E.B.N.Es I have a serious problem I managed to go through whole Roy Mustang Insanity test without laughing what should I do?OOC: Find Katamari Damaci and play it for three days straight (sleeping is cheating). That should fix you right up.
urial angel of death

04-23-07, 09:23 PM		A cycloptian claw burst through the roof. Sarah saw it tear into Kerrith’s side leaving ribbons of blood that seemed to hang in the air. As she looked at him Kerrith’s form became that of a red-haired woman, a fur-covered boy, a girl she knew was her sister, and finally back to his own. Sarah felt the rage and Fury build inside of her to unimaginable levels. That thing was hurting her friends her family. It had to pay!

Suddenly her rage was granted the force of vengeance it desired. Her nails lengthened into claws, the tiny muscles lining her limbs toned and strengthened, and her eyes glossed over in a red haze.

Sarah: GRRAAAAHHH!!!

In one leap she was on the star spawn’s head ripping at its soft yielding flesh. All Sarah could think about was the wonderful sensation of the kill, all else was numb. But the bloody haze was pierced by a familiar worried voice.

Kerrith: Sarah, look out its got your leg!

When she turned to look Sarah saw the creature’s tentacles wrapped securely around her left leg, and rapidly rotting any flesh they touched. Sarah felt wave after wave of nauseating pain. Just as the entropy reached her bones Sarah fell unconscious from the pain.

Kerrith: Don’t hurt my sister!

Fire concentrated on Kerrith’s outstretched hand and rocketed toward the star spawn. The solid mass of flame shattered its kneecap and tore out the other side. So with a shriek of pain it dropped Sarah and retreated from the now totaled jeep.
urial angel of death

04-23-07, 09:29 PM		OOUrial: I didn't laugh at all for the insanity test.

OOKaizer: You know what this means. Back to the cell.

OOUrial enters a room with two televisions. One showing every Braidy Bunch episode in chronological order on infinite-loop. The other was doing like-wise for Excel Saga.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-24-07, 12:01 AM		OOC: BTW, nice post of random silliness, dutchmason. :D

IC:

FX Demon: *POOF*

Monsters: We're monsters! Let's fight!

Elina: Ummm...why?

Lilly: Oh, I know. This is called a "Random Encounter".

Elina: :confused: Wha' ch'you talkin' 'bout, Lilly?

Lilly: You'll just be walking around and BAM! A bunch of monsters appear and you've gotta fight them to the death.

Tirmek: :uh-huh: You're a looney.

Monsters: We're waiting...

Elina: Just a sec.

Monsters: Make it quick.

Lilly: Watch this. I've got an idea. *walks up to the monsters*

Tirmek: :bored: This should be good.

Lilly: You monsters are in for it now. See her? *points at Sarah* She's a Werewolf Berzerker. A pit of unyeilding fury, a nexus of rage that is tapped into the very Dark One herself!

Sarah: Actually-

Lilly: The very heavens quake at her battle cry! Demons flee in terror at the mere mention of her name, angels live in fear of incuring her wrath!

Sarah: But-

Lilly: But you need not take my word for it! Lo, do you see the bloody mass that was once the Great Fiend Carrot Top?! He has been reduced to ground beef. How, you ask? Twas the work of this very girl, says I!

Sarah: If you'd let me ta-

Lilly: And now you stand against her? Oh, I pity you foul and wretched creatures. At least take some solace in the knowledge that you don't taste like Ninja and will not have to experience more than a few moments of excruciating pain.

Sarah: Um...actually I used up may last rage against the Annoying One.

Lilly: ...oh.

Tirmek: Ok, I'm done with this.

Monsters: Attack!

Tirmek: LILLY-DOKEN!

Tirmek hurles Lilly at the monsters.

Lilly: Ohcrapohcrapohcrapohcrapohcrapohcra- :lightbulb: Two-Fisted Monkey Style Attack!

Tirmek: :uh-huh: Whatever that is it better involve him keeping his pants on.

Elina: :drool: I don't know about that.

*AWESOME BLUR OF ATTACKING*

The monsters die.

Lilly: Pretty cool, huh?

Tirmek: Can I ask you something?

Lilly: Shoot.

Tirmek: Two-Fisted Monkey Style?

Lilly: Yep.
Paulon

04-24-07, 12:19 AM		OOC: All E.B.N.Es I have a serious problem I managed to go through whole Roy Mustang Insanity test without laughing what should I do?

Dunno. If you get some sane advice that isn't posted on this thread, please let me know, because I'm in the same sad state as you. :raincloud
Charles Phipps

04-24-07, 12:22 AM		Lilly: It's a lot like two fisting monkey style but a lot less gross.

Tirmek: ewwwww.

Lilly: But we're off to save the King's daughter!

Tirmek: What? Princess Sarah was IN THE CASTLE!

Lilly: Oh not her.

Tirmek: His other daughter was Tiamat, Lilly.

Lilly: Yes, but he randomly adopted ANOTHER daughter and she was kidnapped.

Tirmek: Who?

Lilly: Terra!

Sarah and Elina: Mommy?

Lilly: Yes by the greatest and most powerful Blackguard in the world! MICHAEL!

***

Michael: Please don't hurt me.

Terra: :angry pomm:

***

Tirmek: So what do they call this place anyway?

Lilly: The Temple of Fiends.

Tirmek: Uhhh....Lilly, this is a Native Tanelnta Plains Halfling Casino.

Lilly: It's where Garland...err Michael...is hanging out.

Elina: Are we old enough to gamble.

Sarah: I am Maya Lopez Fitzgerald Sanchez and I'm 32. Let's go get a bucket of quarters.
rampant

04-24-07, 01:21 AM		Elina - Fine you win Stupid weapon proficiency (spoony humanoid) is a useful feat, now stop smiling like that.

Tirmek - :D I would but I can't, I now have a legitamate strategic reason to throw Lily to his potencial death at every oppurtunity.
Charles Phipps

04-24-07, 01:46 AM		Lilly: Just remember I have the Dragonslave guy...

Tirmek: I have like 90% magic resistance and you're immune to your own spell, Sarah and Elina are Solars.

Lilly: But it'll blow us up REAL GOOD!
Crystalforged

04-24-07, 03:10 AM		I question the tests validity. I watched the entire video without a single giggle and I dare any of you to try and call me "sane". Even the voices only thought it was vaguely amusing at best. I spent the entire video just trying to remember where I had heard that song in the background before and taking note of the fact that since the clip was one minute long with the introduction that the picture wasn't actually up for a full 60 seconds.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-24-07, 03:22 AM		...taking note of the fact that since the clip was one minute long with the introduction that the picture wasn't actually up for a full 60 seconds.OOC: Yeah, I noticed that too. But seriously, what could be funnier than Roy Mustang in a Mustang making engine noises?

IC:

Michael: Soon...soon my enemies will kneel before me! After all this time, all the planning, the hardships, enduring night after night of torment, I am prepared to unleash my plan of terrible...um...nefariousness upon my mortal foes!

Terra: Honestly, you suck at this.

Michael: Silence, captive wench! Only someone of my villanous...uh...villanousness could concoct a plan as unpleasant as this!

Terra: They're Forest Imps. Just go out and start kicking them around.

Michael: But that would be mean...

Terra: *sigh* Good cookies, though.

Michael: I've made crumpets for later.

Terra: You know it's probably not the best idea to let me wander about your "den of evil" so freely. I could really have left any time I wanted for the last day.

Michael: But...my plan...

Motoko: I've seen Spoony Elementals come up with better. And they can barely remember how to breathe without assistance. Or that they don't need to breathe in the first place.

Michael: Oh, I've got a great idea! Since you're so good at this, maybe you could give me some pointers?

Terra: ...meh. I'm stuck here till the end of the arc. Why not?

Michael: Yay!

Terra & Motoko: (i.h.h.) Sucker.
Paulon

04-24-07, 03:28 AM		Engine noises? To be honest the only thing I found funny was that people found it funny. *sighs* I guess I'm just not crazy enough.
rampant

04-24-07, 03:35 AM		OORampant - I think that test only works on mild cases of nutty that haven't gotten a handle on the reduced impulse control or refined their taste for the absurd. For moderate to heavy cases i'd wager that false negatives are common.

Kithle - what are you a psych major?
Kaizer_Ryu

04-24-07, 03:48 AM		Engine noises?
OOC: Yes, engine noises. That's all I could hear throughout the whole thing. Maybe I had the volume down too low, but I really didn't hear any song. I picture everything in Manga format, so I've now got the image of Mr. Uber-Serious pretending to drive a car stuck in my head. :D
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-24-07, 08:14 AM		Lilly: But it'll blow us up REAL GOOD!
Tirmek: :uh-huh: Are you even listening to yourself?

Lilly: It is the advantage of a low Wisdom score.

Tirmek: Advantage?

Lilly: My brilliant thoughts don't get cluttered by such trivial things as common sense.

Sarah:…………………I suppose you need common sense to know you need common sense.

Tirmek: What brilliant thoughts? Bascially everything you do seems designed to get you killed. It's amazing that you have a girlfriend at all.

Elina: :cloud9:

Lilly: She is attracted to my nonsenstrategic genius.

Tirmek: And you go around making up words. Makes me skeptical that you have a high Intelligence.

Lilly: Well, that's just my flaw. Every genius has one. Mine is wording. I admit I'm not good at it, things might be better for me if I had studied more in school…… (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_AI0FhfEcQ&NR)

(pause)

Elina: First "Ted" and now Brian?

Lilly: Yes. Brian is the first name given to me, but I had to change it.

Elina: Why?

Lilly: After surviving the failed resurrection of my mother, a group of wandering seekers of spiritual healing decided I was their savior. I eventually had to fake my death just to get them to leave me alone. I hear they still worship me, though they've split into the sects of the Shoe and the Gourd.
dutchmason

04-24-07, 04:23 PM		OODutch: Must resist urge to add more random contributions.

13 Isn't that what you're doing right noe? :rolleyes:

OODucth: Wait...NOOOO! Curses foiled again.

13 You're just really impatient aren't you?

OODutch Yes! I demand Satisfaction!

Kanatash Hello.

OODutch: Not you...oh :censored: :bigeyes: :shocked: :help: :OMG! :ghosted:

Kanatash; Kanatash Brand E.B.N.E. And DM Blaster copyright before you were born don't even think about it. Order yours now!

OODutch: I can taste colours...ugh.
........................................ ........................................ ....

MORE SILLIENESS!

........................................ ........................................ ....

Somewhere near a portal to The Island....

Benedick: Ugh, my head...I can taste colours....

Satnak: Um...do I know you.

Benedick: You've got a purdy mouth. :D

........................................ ........................................ ....

In a small cabin nearby.....

Chives: I think sir has finally retrieved all of them.

Stewie: Yes I think so....

Benedick: *Smashes through one wall and out the other* SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH...

Stewie: It appears I missed one...

Chives: Sir?

Stewie: The serrated one.

........................................ ........................................ ....

In a delicate lab nearby...

Ketler: Almost....almost....*he carefully puts a drop of silver liquid into another beaker*

Benedick: *Flying through the room and smashing delicate equipment all over the place* ...HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII IIIIII...

Ketler: Mommy!:shocked:
BANG!

........................................ ........................................ ....

In the hidden ultra-extra-outer-dimensional E.B.N.E. lounge...

OOcat: As I was saying Terra is-

Benedick: *Somehow flying through a non-existent non-reachable area of the ship*...IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII IIIIIIIIIIIIIII...

OOCrystalforged: You were saying?

........................................ ........................................ ....

In a dungeon half-way across the countinent...

Terra: I really don't think that armor works on you, try this instead

Michael: I don't-

Benedick: *Coming smashing through the wall and then into the one next to Terra* ...IT!
........................................ ........................................ ....

Bunny: :twitch: How can he not be dead!

13 :rofl: Everyone hates him now! :rofl:

OODutch: I know! Its fantastic!

........................................ ........................................ ....

Announcer: Our hero lies abandoned in thye dungon after Atnak's pan dimensional punch of DOOM...from the FUTURE....and SPACE! What will happen next? What will Terra do? Will Michael put on a dress? How long will it take the other E.B.N.E.s to find where OODutch lives and rip out his spleen for disrupting their arc and his incessant posting of totally random sillieness? Who is standing next to me?

Cuddles: Hello! I like Spleen

Announcer: Why are you looking at me like that...DEAR GOD THATS TENDER! I NEED THAT! THAT TOO! OH MY CLAVIN!

Cuddles: I like my Spleen with extra agony and clavin please!
rampant

04-24-07, 04:32 PM		Chalky - Move over cat-toy this one is getting the sweet&sour sauce treatment.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-24-07, 04:41 PM		OOCat:
OOcat: I would prefer to be refferred to as OOcat, small c. It's part of my character that I never speak Out Of Character.
urial angel of death

04-24-07, 06:33 PM		OOC: Great work Dutch, but who is Chives?
Charles Phipps

04-24-07, 07:54 PM		Terra: So why are you evil again anyway Michael? Last time I checked, you were a superhero.

Michael: I fell off the wagon.

Terra: I for one resent that homosexual behavior is viewed as an addiction.

Michael: Not that!

*pause*

Michael: Not that I've ever engaged in anything like that. No, you see Terra, I have a confession to make. I'm actually addicted to spirits.

Terra: Succubi or Eriynes?

Michael: Alcohol! Rum! The Dragon's Liquor!

Terra: Great, there's nothing this thread won't make fun of is there? HAVE YOU NO SHAME!?

OOCharles: No.

Terra: So, how did your affection for rum get you to turn evil?

Michael: Christopher Lee.

Terra: What?

Michael: Yes, the greatest character actor of all time!

Terra: Are you high?

Michael: No, Christopher Lee started appearing in my dreams and waking days tempting to me to world domination and evil through the metaphor of liquor.

***

Kanatash: *whistles*

***

Michael: Yeah, it got so bad that I starred in Superman 3 as Christopher Reeve's evil double despite being totally unsuitable for the part.

http://www.fluxw.com/superdrunk.jpg

Terra: Michael, that's just ridiculous.

Michael: I can still remember....Christopher Lee SINGING about it.

*flashback waves*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pGJci1W0K5Q

Terra: :OMG!

Michael: Oh well, time to lure in your family to kill them.

***

Outside the Temple of Fiends Hotel and Casino

Tirmek: This is obviously a trap.

FREE PIE

Elina, Sarah, Lilly: PIE!

Tirmek: Idiots.

The Pie is also Evil

Tirmek: Hmmmm.....well it CAN'T be bad then!
Kaizer_Ryu

04-24-07, 07:57 PM		OOC: That's...what...your fifth post, dutchmason? You got every one of those characters down perfectly. That deserves the :bounce: trophy for random insanity. :D
Kaizer_Ryu

04-24-07, 10:12 PM		Michael: Fool! You have entered my domain uninvited! No cookies for you!

Benedick: What kind are they?

Michael: They have chocolate and peanutbutter chips and are fresh from the oven! I shall fetch three glasses of ice cold milk and then...muah ha ha haaaaa...then you shall be forced to sit here and WATCH US EAT THEM!

Benedick: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! :weep:

Terra: *sigh*

Michael: What am I doing wrong now?! I made him cry! Now I feel all guilty...

Terra: You're supposed to take him prisoner and find out how he got here, why he came, who's with him, what he- DAMMIT MICHAEL! STOP SERVING HIM ICE COLD REFRESHMENTS!

Michael: :( But...

Benedick: This tea is delicious! Chai?

Michael: It's not only tasty it helps remove all those nasty toxins slowing you down. :D

*WHACK*

Terra: Thank you.

Motoko: He's an insult to BBEG's everywhere.

Michael: Ow... I don't wanna be a bad host. The PTA meeting is coming up and I really want to impress the neighbors!

Motoko: Dear GODS you're pathetic.

Michael: :mad: What should I do with him then?

Terra: Why don't you make him your minion?

Michael: Oh, I've always wanted a minion!

As Benedick stands up, he accidentally presses a hidden switch, dropping him through a trap door.

Motoko: Or you could do that, sure.

-----

Outside

Benedick: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!! !!! *shoots out the other end of the trap door* OOF!

Forest Imps: :devil:

Much Later

Benedick finds himself the guest of honor (he thinks) at some kind of arcane ritual. An effigy of Garla-...er, Michael is suspended over a vat of a viscous green liquid that fizzes slightly and smells vaguely like a combination of battery acid and lime. The Forest Imps dance around the vat chanting something unintelligable.

Benedick: *anime sweatdrop*
Charles Phipps

04-24-07, 11:48 PM		Lilly: So we're captured.

Tirmek: *crunch crunch mmmmph mmph*

Lilly: Stop eating your evil pie while we're here.

Sarah: OOW OW OW OW OWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

Elina: Sorry, full moon, we're going to do this all night.

***

Michael CREATURES OF THE NIGHT! WHAT MUSIC THEY MAKE!

Terra: Okay, got my new outfit for evil.

Michael: GAH! It's so....evil!

Terra: I prefer sultry.

Motoko: A better term is Slutty.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-25-07, 12:51 AM		Motoko: A better term is Slutty.http://www.dragon-tear.net/images/bof2/BoF2_nina2.jpg

Terra: You know you want some.

-----

Momo: So here we are.

Deis: Yep.

Momo: Again.

Deis: Uh-huh.

Momo: Being pawned off on the rest of the crew so the Entities can screw around with Mom, Elina and Sarah ne-san.

Deis: I figure you'd be used to this by now.

Momo: I just wanted to make sure I wasn't mistaken. :devil:

*whips out a control device with a LARGE RED BUTTON (TM)*

*press*

*nothing happens*

Momo: :confused:

Deis: :bored: Wow. That was so impressive.

Momo: :mad: Where's Oni-chan?

*elsewhere*

Scias: :eek: (i.h.h.) What have I done?!

Chi (http://www.animecutie.com/pictures/chobits-wallpaper-19.jpg): Chi?

Scias: Um...h-h-h-h-hi...

Chi: Chi. Chi?

Scias: (i.h.h.) I think ne-chan still has some bugs to work out.

Chi: Chi? *past him on the head*

Scias: P-p-p-p-p-pretty...

Chi: Chi~! :cloud9: *gives him a big hug*

Scias: :eek: :blush:

-----

Terra: So I was thinking that you should expand on your operation a bit. You're position isn't terribly secure as it stands.

She leads them to the balcony.

Terra: I took the liberty of expanding upon existing tracts of land. I do believe you'll find them quite pleasing.

Motoko: You've got great taste. They're beautiful.

Terra: Perhaps later you'd like to give them a go over?

Motoko: Such fine tracts of land deserve no less than a full inspection.

Terra: I'm sure you'll be pleased. The curvy terrain can be intimidating to the inexperienced.

Motoko: It wouldn't be my first time. They look quite firm to me.

Michael: Oh come ON! Everyone knows this whole conversation is just a giant metaphor for brea-*WHAM*

Forest Imps: *reloading their catapult* :evillaugh

Michael: CURSE YOU FOUL DEMONS! ...where was I?

Motoko: The prisoners.

Michael: Ah yes! Now I shall serve them a fabulous turkey dinner, but deny them gravy! Their meat shall be forever dry! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!!!

Terra: *groan*
rampant

04-25-07, 01:09 AM		Tirmek - *Call gravy*

Elina - How many call powers do you have?

Tirmek - *Call Girlfriend*

Sarah - (disoriented) Where did the rolls go?

Tirmek - Enough
Charles Phipps

04-25-07, 01:21 AM		Lilly: Obviously we need a hero who has the power to bust out of this magical prison.

Tirmek: Surely a competent villain would have barred us from using our magic to escape.

Lilly: This is michael.

Tirmek: Ooooooohhh.

Lilly: Very well, at last, a chance to prove my worth to Elina.

*creek*

Elina: Hey, I got the door open!

Lilly: Wha?

Elina: I said I had to go to the Bathroom and Michael left it unlocked.

Lilly: Obviously, we need to use our potions of flying to get out of the place.

Elina: Or we could take the stairs.

Sarah: Do we have SNAPPLE flavored?

Lilly: These were made by Aerith, duh.

*Sarah chugs it*

Sarah: WHOOPPIEEEEEEEE!

http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f350/Willowhugger/juliepowerzw5.jpg

Elina: Oh great, Quistis spiked those with peyote again didn't she?

Lilly: Maybe.
Charles Phipps

04-25-07, 01:33 AM		Michael: Oh well, they've escaped my dungeon.

Terra: Of course they did! You only left 4 Kobolds to guard it!

Michael: Kobolds are the chihuaha race! They're the most dangerous in the world!

Terra: Ugh.

Michael: Oh no! We've got to keep them from Fluffy!

Terra: Fluffy?

Michael: He's the doorman and my pet! He's helpless before those fiends.

Terra: He like a bunny or something?

Michael: No, I wasn't a SICK child Terra. He's my half-Pit Fiend/half-Red Dragon...Lich.

***

Dungeon

Lilly: RUNNNAWAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY YYYYYYYYY!

Tirmek: *thinks* Must blame Lilly for this somehow...Must Blame Lilly....

Lilly: Now for a Pat Benetar music number starring me!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oynSYKrwJuI

Tirmek: Oh God, you had to make the situation WORSE didn't you?

Elina: WHO THE HELL WAS THAT WOMEN IN THERE WITH YOU?

Lilly: Oh that's Violet, she's my girlfriend in another dimension.

Elina: What?!

Lilly: What happens on 616 Earth stays in 616 Earth!
rampant

04-25-07, 02:43 AM		Tirmek - I could screw around with his neurons till the only woman he finds attractive is you.

Elina - hmmmmm

Tirmek - Or better yet toss him in a volcano.
Paulon

04-25-07, 02:48 AM		OOPaulon: Do you really want to make the volcano throw up?
rampant

04-25-07, 02:54 AM		Tirmek - Depends on how much it hurts Lily.
Charles Phipps

04-25-07, 03:02 AM		Lilly: Eh, why would a Volcano hurt me?

Tirmek: because it's hot.

Lilly: Oh, well I decided to be invulnerable.

Tirmek: Eh?

Lilly: Yeah, I don't know why more people don't do it.
rampant

04-25-07, 03:11 AM		Tirmek - Because invulnerable makes you spell/power immune

Lily - why would that be a pro-AAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH MY BRAIIIIIIIIIIIN IT BURRRRRRRRRRNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSS

Tirmek - You see memories aren't covered in the invulnerable clause, the binds that keep them surpressed however.

Sarah - What's he remembering?

Tirmek - The time he realized if Elina grew tentacles, she'd probably use them on him.
Charles Phipps

04-25-07, 03:15 AM		Lilly: Woah, do it again.

Tirmek: Huh?

Lilly: That's like eating ice cream REALLY REALLY fast.

Tirmek: Dammit!

Lilly: Awesome! You made me forget my 4 year old bed problems!

***

Ravana: Why do you torment my beloved Tirmek so?

Dol Arrah: Because the gods favor fools.

***

Lilly: Hey, I feel poking.

Tirmek: *STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB*

Sarah: Why giving up the memory thing?

Tirmek: I'm afraid he'll forget he hates me.

Lilly: Let's be best friends Tirmek! Like how we first met at summer camp!

***

Camp Evil next store to Camp Good

Lilly: Stupid guy, saying I needed to learn only one School of Fighting and I learned all Ten!

Tirmek: Yeah, I had that problem here. Apparently murdering all my instructors at Assassin School was considered overachieving.

Lilly: You're awesome and now let's travel together forever!

***

Tirmek: NOOoooooooooooooo (http://darthno.ytmnd.com/)
Kaizer_Ryu

04-25-07, 03:30 AM		Tirmek - The time he realized if Elina grew tentacles, she'd probably use them on him.Elina: You know, Tirmek...that goes for you as well.

Tirmek: Why do you think I've been staving off her advances so long? I'm totally not ready for that yet. I'm actually terrified I'd enjoy the experience. I don't think mother's heart could take it. She'd find out one way or another... *glares at Silver*

Silver: :D

Elina: You're also aware her cycle coincides with the full moon, right?

Tirmek: :uh-huh: How would you kn- right. Same room.

Elina: If she ever goes into heat...you're a dead man. You've seen her pillow post-full moon.

Tirmek: And the sheets, and (after she's done with it) what can only be vaguely described as a mattress, and the bed frame, and the walls, and the curtains...
rampant

04-25-07, 03:40 AM		Tirmek is chiseling something on a rock.

Lily - Watcha doin

Tirmek - There is a note explaining everything on the bottom of this conveinient six foot deep hole.

Lily gets into the pit and picks up the note it reads:

I hate you Lily!

- Tirmek

P.S. - You're spoony

P.P.S. - Why are you still reading this?

Tirmek flips a massive pile of mud into the pit. Then layers over it with 3-tons of lead. He then proceeds to do the Macerena next to the stone he carved this message into:

Here lies an Idiot.
Dance people Dance!
Charles Phipps

04-25-07, 03:42 AM		Lilly: Hey cool! I found a secret passage thanks to Tirmek's help!

Tirmek: GAH!

Lilly: Let's go get that EVIL Michael!

Tirmek: .....

Lilly: *thinks* I wonder how long it'll take Tirmek to realize that 1. I haven't lost any of my hatred for him 2. I'm a wizard and that I was using a globe of invulnerability along with a Dimension Door spell.
rampant

04-25-07, 04:05 AM		Tirmek - (i.h.h. I wonder how long until he realizes that even with his paladin levels, he's got the least HP, AC, saves, and senses out of all of us, and he's now in front.)
---------------------------------------

Teiza - Yo, blondie I need to use the fuzz-brain.

Chi - Chi?

Teiza - Let go of my theif's left hand so he can get the stuff on this list for Momo, except the Dragon-Eel skins *urp*.
Charles Phipps

04-25-07, 04:09 AM		OOC: It's like a deranged game with a man that changes the rules versus the ultimate master of chess in the world.

;-)
rampant

04-25-07, 04:15 AM		OOC: It's like a deranged game with a man that changes the rules versus the ultimate master of chess in the world.

;-)

OORampant - I love this thread.
-----------------------------------------

Scias - (i.h.h. "My theif" well I say, that young lady is quite possesive. I'm sure she means well, but dear me that sounds wrong.)
Paulon

04-25-07, 04:25 AM		Tirmek - Depends on how much it hurts Lily.

That's not the issue so much as the fact that if you're throwing him in, then you'll be right there when the volcano erupts... might hurt you worse than him.

*notes that he really needs to write that character introduction to make comments like this more appropriately, time permitting*
dutchmason

04-25-07, 06:33 AM		Michael[/B]: Oh come ON! Everyone knows this whole conversation is just a giant metaphor for brea-*WHAM*

Forest Imps: *reloading their catapult* :evillaugh

Michael: CURSE YOU FOUL DEMONS!

Somewhere in the courtyard below...

Benedick:Every bone in my body is broken...thrice

........................................ ........................................ ....Fine if you must... Chives:
Redshirt butler with an obsession with onions.

Peace Out.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-25-07, 08:29 AM		Chi: Chi?
OOcat: Oh no, I'm not going through that series again! 13! Disk!

13: What makes you think—

OOcat: D****T, without the disk of preprogrammed personality the whole thing is one big situation comedy, aka your schtick. Now hand it over!

13: *sigh* (hands over disk)

OOcat: *insert disk*

Chi: :mymy: :twitch: :crazy: :blink: :drool: :evillaugh

Scias: :uh-huh:

OOcat: Now that that's settled—

Scias: Are you sure that was the right disk?

OOcat: I got the disk from 13. :bored: Why would you expect it to be the right one?

Scias: But then why'd you do it?

OOcat: Mix things up.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-25-07, 08:35 AM		OOC: Okay, folks, I have these two Ed-synced youtube comedy videos, but I can't think what to do with them. I'm just gonna put them up so someone else can use them or something. (These routines could definitely be canabalized for individual parts.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UjXxp1w5fQ4&NR=1
ttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MbvnMF7DlTw&mode=related&search=
Charles Phipps

04-25-07, 03:36 PM		Hehehehe, wait until after Terra is "rescued" and Roy Mustang starts his own bit as THE NEW MILITARY ADVISOR OF KING STEVE!

(apparently, Steve conquered them without firing a shot. Poker match. Well, technically the string is the King but hey)
rampant

04-25-07, 03:55 PM		OORampant - Give it up we all know the string is running the country.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-25-07, 04:23 PM		(……Well, technically the string is the King but hey)
Roy: Easy enough to fix. *finger snap*

String: *burned*

Roy: I now claim rulership of both Karrnath and Breland by the ancient right of Killing The Old Guy. :P

OOC: Sorry, Charles, but this just struck me as too sensible and funny not to do.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

04-25-07, 04:45 PM		Ash::OMG! He just... a pice of string! :banghead: ... I burn 10 class levels to master fire and some po faced derivatave becomes king for igniting some :hoppingma string! You deminish meeee

Chanse :cloud9:
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-25-07, 06:08 PM		13: It's the moments when you weren't even trying that make it all worthwhile.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-25-07, 06:09 PM		Steve: Oh, goodness! You've immolated the Court Jester!

Roy: The...what?

Steve: Admittedly it was the most entertaining thing he's done, but I fear our King shall be disheartened by this loss.

Roy: Actually I don't really care all that much ab-

Steve: There there, your majesty! We shall send your new vassal, Sir Paladinmount here, to seek you out a fitting replacement.

Roy: :uh-huh:

Sara: Oh gods. We're being ruled by King Rodney the imaginary again...

Steve: Ah, there you are my dear! How goes the celebration in Thrane to the news?

Sara: Just because you said you adopted their Queen, who, I might add, is at least ten times your age, as your daughter doesn't mean they accept Brelish rule.

Steve: Even under the benevolence of our good King Rodney?

Sara: I'm afraid so.

Steve: Then I must regretfully advise my Lord to declare WAR.

Sara: We've been at war with them for the last five months. And thirty different times since you came to power. Not to mention Droaam is considering adopting your attacks as a new annual sporting event.

Roy: :twitch:

-----

*knock* *knock*

Terra: Go away!

Motoko: *muffled agreement*

Michael: But I need help! They've outrun Fluffy and found the secret passage!

Terra: *sigh* Ambush them when they come out the other side.

Michael: It's a secret passage! How am I supposed to know where it goes?!

Motoko: *something muffled*

Terra: Oh, sorry. *sound of tentacles moving*

Motoko: Thank you. Ok, Michael, I'm gonna make this quick because I'm having a rather new experience in here and you're annoying me.

Michael: :drool: OOOOOOO! Let me see!

Terra: :mad: Open that door and I'll throw you to the Forest Imps just like the first time!

Michael: :hides: Eep.

Motoko: You have to go to your throne room, place all your minions between you and the heros in order of increasing difficulty. *to Terra* Not so hard! *to Michael* Make sure they can take all of them down relatively easily and that each drops useful items to help them as they progress. *to Terra* Oh, yeah, right there's good. *to Michael* Eventually they'll reach you. You need to have a big, overly dramatic speech laid out, which they have to listen to, about what fools they are and how you're going to crush them. Make sure to reveal your Master Plan. *to Terra* *giggle* Stop that! I'm ticklish! *to Michael* Then, once they kick your ass, you have to either die in spectacular fashion or swear revenge before escaping by the skin of your teeth.

Michael: :( That doesn't sound very fun at all...

Terra: Go. Away.

Michael: :allalone: *walks off*

Motoko: I thought he'd never leave. Now keep going. I think my shoulder's starting to stiffen up again.

A peek in the room reveals Terra giving Motoko a relaxing massage using multiple tentacles for trigger point therapy and encouraging myofascial release. Motoko lies on her stomach with her head in the head rest.

Motoko: *muffled* You're good at this.

Terra: Yes. Yes I am. :D
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-25-07, 06:13 PM		OOcat: I knew that's what it was going to be.

Bunny: Seriously, the Cat did.

13: We'd make fun of it if it hadn't.

Silver: Saw it in an animé once.
rampant

04-25-07, 06:21 PM		Dorvos - hmmmmmmm (after 9 years you'd think I'd learn how to avoid getting cat hair in my Cheerios.) Phffftb

Kitten - Excuse me?

Mittens opens one eye sleepily, yawns, and rolls over on Dorvos's head.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kobold - This sucks, when are we gonna get a commander that knows how his arse from his knees?

Kobold adept - When owlbears fly.

Kobold rogue - Yeah we're fodder to most people.

Kobold on a soapbox - STRIKE STRIKE STRIKE!

Kobold - Beats waiting around here to die.
-------------------------------------------------

Elina - This is weird

Tirmek - About damned time really, you don't see kobolds from my world schlepping around as 1st level monsters. Sadistic little bastards.

Lily - Still on principle we should

Sarah - (wearing blue face paint) RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH CHARGE!

A bunch of kobolds form up behind her with hide armor and more blue face paint.
Charles Phipps

04-25-07, 06:21 PM		Elina: Lilly, we need to...HOLY CRAP!

*Elina sees Lilly surrounded by dismembered and mutiliated bodies with him uterrly splattered by entrails. The walls are COVERED in blood and the the place has been subject to a nightmarish orgy of violence*

Lilly: Oh hi Elina.

Elina: What the HELL happened here?

Lilly: Ummmm...yes. Well there was a disagreement about them telling me where Michael was.

Elina: This guys feet are around his neck!

Lilly: I may have overdid it a bit.

Elina: That man doesn't have a head!

Lilly: Yes, I sorta flushed it.

Elina: You're a paladin!

Lilly: Well duh. How else could you justify this sort of slaughter?

Elina::uh-huh:

*Organ Music played*

*Michael leaps out in his armor and a cape*

Michael: I HAVE YO....

*he slips on the blood and screamingly flies out the window, two stories up*

Sarah: Well that was easy.

*Terra's druid magic then captures them all and suspends them above a terrible bubbling green fluid*
rampant

04-25-07, 06:34 PM		Tirmek - Listen Mrs. Branford we all hate Micheal/what's his name

What's his name - :weep:

Tirmek - Can we move along here, I need to have some words with Sarda.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-25-07, 07:03 PM		*Terra's druid magic then captures them all and suspends them above a terrible bubbling green fluid*
Lilly: MOUNTAIN DEW!

Terra: No, no, this is acid. I checked. I wouldn't want to hurt my girls.

Tirmek: What about me? It doesn't list acid immunity/resistance in the rakshasa entry.

Terra: You're a tough boy, you can handle it.
rampant

04-25-07, 07:20 PM		Tirmek - Ok I'm getting out of here. Lily close your eyes.

Lily - grumble *closes eyes*

Tirmek shifts into his girlform, unfortunately his last female glamerweave setting was the schoolgirl uniform Sarah had gotten him. Being tied upside down...

Elina - How did you get her to wear that frilly monstrosity?

Sarah - That was her idea.:D

Terra - Sarah we are having a talk when we get home...I have to know where you found those.

Tirmek - :embarrass Hold onto the rope.

Lily - First my eyes now the rope, Since when do I take orders fro-aaaaaaaaahhh it burns!

Elina and Sarah are free above the bowl, Sarah is holding Tirmek by her legs.

Elina - Are you gonna put her down now?

Sarah - I really like the veiw.:D

Tirmek - :blush: :)

Terra - I think their both enjoying this.
dutchmason

04-25-07, 07:57 PM		Elina: Lilly, we need to...HOLY CRAP!

*Elina sees Lilly surrounded by dismembered and mutiliated bodies with him uterrly splattered by entrails. The walls are COVERED in blood and the the place has been subject to a nightmarish orgy of violence*

Lilly: Oh hi Elina.

Elina: What the HELL happened here?

Lilly: Ummmm...yes. Well there was a disagreement about them telling me where Michael was.

Elina: This guys feet are around his neck!

Lilly: I may have overdid it a bit.

Elina: That man doesn't have a head!

Lilly: Yes, I sorta flushed it.

Elina: You're a paladin!

Lilly: Well duh. How else could you justify this sort of slaughter?

Elina::uh-huh:

*Organ Music played*

*Michael leaps out in his armor and a cape*

Michael: I HAVE YO....

*he slips on the blood and screamingly flies out the window, two stories up*

Sarah: Well that was easy.

*Terra's druid magic then captures them all and suspends them above a terrible bubbling green fluid*

Benedick: Why must random violence always include me! :Removes feet from neck:

OODutch: Well I think its funny.

Benedick: Please you have nothing cognicent to add to the arc so you just enjoy inserting me wherever violence occurs I'm totally innocent!

OODutch: You're (http://www.nuklearpower.com/daily.php?date=010611) not (http://www.nuklearpower.com/daily.php?date=010828) Alone (Find your own example...) (http://www.nuklearpower.com/archive.php)

Benedick: ... Can I go back yet?

OODutch: No...

Michael falls out a window...

Michael: Ahhhh...! *SPLAT!* My spleen

Benedick: My clavin!

OODutch: NOw you're good.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-26-07, 12:28 AM		OOKaizer: :eek: :hides: :duel: :mymy: :gah: :w00t: :D :OMG! *continues for five minutes*

Sarah: What is he doing? He's supposed to be continuing the arc!

Elina: He's trying to beat Sephiroth on KHII again.

Sarah: *groan* He's just gonna get killed by the Sin Harvest/Warp Strike combo like the last 800 times.

OOKaizer: :gah: *gets hit with Sin Harvest* *button mashes for Elixer* *survives*

Sarah: That's a first...

*Meteor*

OOKaizer: :shocked: *somehow survives*

Elina: :uh-huh: He's not dead yet?

*Critical Hit* *Sphiroth falls*

OOKaizer: :dancin: :cheer:

Elina: :bored: You beat a CG Bad Guy's AI. Woopty doo.

OOKaizer: I take my victories where I can.

-----

Michael: *still on the ground outside* Why? What went wrong? I followed the BBEG's Guide to Villany to the letter!

He pulls it out and lifts the front cover. In flowery writing with hearts and kittens and a multitude of other cute things scribbled around it is the following message:

Dear Uncle Michael,

I hope my suggestions help you out. Most of the ones in here were so mean, and it had all these typos and everything. Even the cover said Villany when it meant Happiness! Can you believe that? But no worries! I fixed it up so you could be as great as I think you are!

Hugs,
Nina.

Michael: ...that explains the heavily annotated and corrected chapter Cooking Forty Slaves in Oil *non-Bold type is penciled in* Your Best Friends: Everything you need.

Benedick: *still being crushed by Michael* Awwwwww...that's adorable. Now get off.

Michael: You know, I'd probably be upset if she wasn't so darn cute...
rampant

04-26-07, 02:10 AM		Tirmek - So now we have to go around finding elemental orbs?

Lily - Yes

Tirmek - Remind me to duct tape you to john when we get home.
------------------------------------

OORampant - We need a sarda!
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-26-07, 01:37 PM		OORampant - We need a sarda!
13 (with mustache and hooded red robe): 'm as old as magic and have ultimate power over creation. You don't think I get bored?
Charles Phipps

04-26-07, 03:35 PM		By popular demand, I've actually updated all of my wikis!

http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Jarlot
http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:_Rose
http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Lilly_Galan
http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Ivy_Galan

Stuff included in the updates include

* The origin of Admiral Jarlot
* What Lilly's exact powers are
* What the hell is WRONG with Lilly
* Why Lilly is passable as sane some times, why he isn't others
* Ivy's sexuality
* Whether Jarlot is dead or alive
rampant

04-26-07, 04:19 PM		Camp freedom year two
Paulon

04-26-07, 05:18 PM		OOPaulon: Is that where a new bunch of children get fed to the survivors of the Year One camp?
Lord Kale Fangblade

04-26-07, 06:41 PM		OOPaulon: Is that where a new bunch of children get fed to the survivors of the Year One camp?

OOKale: There were survivors!?

IC:
Lunch time on the island, Sithis is sat eating with Tirmek and the second generation group. he's eating with one hand and reading a book with the other.
after finishing what ever he was eating, Sithis takes a sip of his water. there's a hissing sound as he drinks it before he confulses and falls to the floor clutching his throat. some smoke rises from his blackened mouth.

Tirmek: Are you ok?

Sithis: *rasping* i just drank concetrated holy water.*Racking cough*

Elina: So that would be a no?

Sarah: jeez. what kind of sick B*****d does that kind of thing?

*** Elsewhere***
Kithle: Achooo!
***

Gaz: Guess. *glares across the hall*

following Gaz's gaze the see Sargas pointing, laughing incencenatly at Sithis's agony. a buch of cronies are also laughing.

Sithis rises, The blackened parts of his mouth receeding quickly. he raises a hand in an arcane gesture.

Tirmek: Sithis....

Sithis: * angerily, a hint of Lord of Darkness vamp tinging his voice* Oh come on! just one little hex, a short spell as a toad. a few singes. thats all i ask.

Elina: I dont think it would be wise to rise to his challange like this, it would make you look bad.

Sithis: *sullenly, Lowering his hands* your right. I cant give him the satisfaction of knowning he's angered me. but i cant just not retaliated.

Gaz: *evil glint in his eyes* There are... other methods of revenge.

Sithis and Gaz lock gazes, and a diabolically evil smirk curves across their lips.

Sithis and Gaz: Let the prank war, BEGIN!

Elina: *sigh* this isnt going to end well. i can see it.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-26-07, 06:49 PM		OOKale: There were survivors!?
Nemesis: *covered in blood* You'd better believe it! *BELCH*

OOC: BTW, awesome job on the wiki, Charles. :D

I'm currently updating some of the bad guys/girls I've introduced. Their section is so far down I keep forgetting about them...
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer

04-26-07, 06:52 PM		OOC: Dont know where the Wiki is even if I thought my 2 charicters were liked by enough other people to add to it. :/
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-26-07, 06:54 PM		* Ivy's sexuality
Silver: *reads* :w00t:

OOcat: :nonono: And we just rejected that joke.

13: Harem anime here we come! :evillaugh

OOcat: At least I never have to update you pidiots.

Erk: :ahem:

UPDATE: http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/Forgotten_Freedom:Erk
dutchmason

04-26-07, 08:30 PM		Camp freedom year two

Benedick: SIgn me up! Less meaningless random violence.

OODutch: More meaningful random violence :razz:.
Charles Phipps

04-26-07, 08:41 PM		Michael's Dungeon

Michael: Now, you are in our clutches!

*Tirmek is suspended opposite from Lilly in a lowering chain as they are slowly dipped towards a giant bucket of greenish fluid*

*Michael is serving cookiees to them*

Elina: Mmmm, good cookiees.

Michael: By the way, I just want to know how really sorry I am for all this horrible acid you're about to be lowered in.

Tirmek: Oh don't worry, we're all immune to it but Lilly and we're very happy that he's going to die horribly.

Lilly: If I can just wiggle my hands free...and cast the Dragonslave.

Tirmek: I'm so glad you can't....he can't can he?

Lilly: Darkness beyond Twilight, Crimson beyond blood that flows...

Tirmek: OH HELL NO!

Michael: Isn't it good to see evil is punished? Now SMITE ME most noble paladin and end my wickedness!

Tirmek: What kind of villain are you!?

***

Terra's Evil Lair

Terra: So, what exactly motivates you Motoko? I know Rose hired you but I don't understand why you cling so stubbornly.

Motoko: I'm a priestess of Dol Dorn. It's my job to guard heroes.

Terra: I didn't know the God of War had priestesses.

Motoko: During the Last War, when the soldiers came into my village, they slaughtered every man down to the mewling babe. The women they lined up and systematically violated before selling us all into slavery.

Terra: That happened alot.

Motoko: I was told in a vision by my blood splattered master that I would find someone whom would end the terrible civil wars that plague the shadows of the world. One whom would raise a final army and crush the evil doers once and for all. That person would be known as the Chaos Bringer.

Terra: I've had quite enough of Prophecy for one day.

Motoko: It's not a prophecy but an offer.

Terra: You want me to become a warlord?

Motoko: No, I want you to teach me how to be one so that I can pay them back in full.

***

*KABLOOOOOOOOOOOOM*

***

Burned Charred Remains of the Castle

Terra: Did you feel something?

Motoko: I was shielded by your magical aura.

Elina: I hurt all over.

Sarah: I'm singed in naughty places and am black all over.

Tirmek: I'd hate Lilly for this but I'm pretty sure he must have killed Michael.

***

Elsewhere

*Michael lands in a den of Forrest Imps*

***

Breland's Throneroom

Seneschal Roy Paladinmount: Your Majesty, the heroes have returned for their reward for returning your children.

Tirmek: This better be good.

King Steve: They'll love our Kickass New Bridge.

Tirmek: A bridge?

King Steve: Yes, King Steve's Kickass Bridge to be Precise. It's enscribed on the side.

Roy Paladinmount: Where did we build a bridge to?

King Steve: Across the Mournland!

Roy Paladinmount: Who the Hell Paid for that!?

King Steve: The infinite pockets of the taxpayer!

Lilly: Awesome yet another step for the quest to find Sarda for clues on how to find the Elemental Orbs!

Tirmek: Where the hell is this guy anyway?

Sarah: *pulls out Brelish phonebook* It says he's in the Cave of Motoya.
rampant

04-26-07, 09:44 PM		Tirmek - HATE LILY!
-------------------------

Teiza - Ok Momo found your bro, and got the stuff.

Momo - i only asked for one d. eel skin.

Teiza - I got hungry.
Paulon

04-26-07, 09:59 PM		OOKale: There were survivors!?

When last seen they were surviving in the Lower Decks by eating redshirts and anything else stupid enough to get caught. Rose managed to get away before they ate him though.
ratslinky

04-26-07, 11:49 PM		OOKale: There were survivors!?

IC:
Lunch time on the island, Sithis is sat eating with Tirmek and the second generation group. he's eating with one hand and reading a book with the other.
after finishing what ever he was eating, Sithis takes a sip of his water. there's a hissing sound as he drinks it before he confulses and falls to the floor clutching his throat. some smoke rises from his blackened mouth.

Tirmek: Are you ok?

Sithis: *rasping* i just drank concetrated holy water.*Racking cough*

Elina: So that would be a no?

Sarah: jeez. what kind of sick B*****d does that kind of thing?

*** Elsewhere***
Kithle: Achooo!
***

Gaz: Guess. *glares across the hall*

following Gaz's gaze the see Sargas pointing, laughing incecentally at Sithis's agony. a bunch of cronies are also laughing.

OOC: I'm sorry to say this but who is Sargas I forget. I want to know what he is like in terms of psych you know what he might fall for and what his weaknesses are
Kaizer_Ryu

04-27-07, 12:22 AM		Motoko: No, I want you to teach me how to be one so that I can pay them back in full.
Terra: I...look, Motoko. I can understand how you must feel. I've only narrowly avoided the same fate several times. My private list of "People to Kill, Torture for Eternity, and/or Break Completely" used to be longer than the Rules list we ignore. I've seen everything I've held dear destroyed no less than three times, lost two mothers, been betrayed by my own father, twice, broke away from the machinizations of more demons than I care to count, been torn to pieces and partially eaten by the devil herself, and lost the only woman I have ever and probably will ever truly love.

Motoko: Then help me. If you know how much it hurts, you know the type of people who would do such a thing. You know they deserve nothing but the worst.

Terra looked at her for a moment before smiling softly and looking out the window.

Terra: It's almost frightening how much you sound like I used to... Not even five years ago I still used revenge as a legitimate option. I figured I was doing it for the sake of my wife and my children and that made it ok.

Motoko: And I want to make sure they don't get away with the horror they perpetuated.

Terra: You also said that the one your master prophesized would sweep away the evil doers.

Motoko: And I want to be that one! Why won't you just say yes?!

Terra: Because of something it took Lisa more than a decade to get through to me. Revenge solves nothing in the long run. It only breeds more hate, more evil. How can you say you'll sweep away evil when you become that which you claim to hate?

Motoko: But-!

Terra: Listen to me. Even assuming that the people who did such a terrible act are truly evil and deserve nothing but death, what next? Where do you draw the line? There are very few truly Evil people in the world. I'm living proof. Had you got on my bad side before I met Lisa, you would be guaranteed a painful and bloody death. I was one of the most despised and feared residents of the shadow world you so loathe.

Motoko: I...but...then what do I do?! NOTHING?! My pain, the pain of every woman who was there, the deaths of fathers, brothers, sons, do they mean NOTHING?! A bunch of thugs uses the haze of war to murder, rape, and pillage the people they're supposedly trying to protect and those who know better have to sit and do nothing at all?!

Terra: I never said that. But if you really want to do the things you claim...you can't fall to their level. Killing those you deem "evil" has a way of translating into killing those you deem "unworthy". For example, the initial purge of the Lycanthropes may have had merit. Many of them were terribly evil. But what of the ones who weren't? What of the ones like Sarah and Scias? It didn't matter if they hadn't hurt a fly, they were "one of them".

Motoko sat there, a mix of frustration, anger, and acknolewdgement. She knew Terra had a point...but what else was there? The rage from the memory bubbled beneath the surface, demanding release. Demanding vengeance.

Motoko: I won't...I can't put my vengeance aside. If you won't help me, then-

Terra shushed her, placing her finger over her lips.

Terra: I never said I wouldn't help. I just don't want you to make the same mistakes I did. When I did what I did, I never thought what it would mean down the line. I've been fighting off my mistakes for years, and my kids, my darlings, the lights of my life have been dragged along for the ride. Elina lost her arm and nearly lost her heart and soul. Sarah has narrowly avoided death and barely escaped enslavement. They have suffered because I was too blind to my own actions.

Motoko closed her eyes, reached up and slowly grasped Terra's hand.

Motoko: ...please...just once...

Terra: What?

Motoko: Can you show me what it was like...between you and Lisa...?

Terra: :mymy: I...but...I couldn't...

Motoko: I'm not asking you to replace her...I just want to know what it was like. Pretend I'm her if you want, I don't care. Just show me that what they did to me isn't the way it always is...

-----

Silver: I was actually beginning to worry about you.

OOKaizer: :bored: You've been waiting for me to finally break, haven't you?

Silver: Explode is more like it.

13: :mad: It's YOUR fault I wasted all that effort.

OOCharles: :D ...uh, I mean... :shifty: I didn't give him the idea and then set it up for him...
Crystalforged

04-27-07, 12:41 AM		Motoko closed her eyes, reached up and slowly grasped Terra's hand.

Motoko: ...please...just once...

Terra: What?

Motoko: Can you show me what it was like...between you and Lisa...?

Terra: :mymy: I...but...I couldn't...

Motoko: I'm not asking you to replace her...I just want to know what it was like. Pretend I'm her if you want, I don't care. Just show me that what they did to me isn't the way it always is...
OOCrystalforged: Alright, show of hands, who saw this coming a mile away? (raises hand)

Kanatash: (raises hand) Yeah.

Kitten: (raises hand.) As soon as she was introduced.
rampant

04-27-07, 01:53 AM		Sagas d'Gelion Male half elf (legacy clan) Soulborn/psion - Master of air and water techniques, favored weapons: Trident (primary), Unarmed (secondary), Cutlass (secondary), powers/melds (ranged and buff)

Daring yet tactical, Sagas relies on command of the battle feild to win his fights. Otherwise ery similar to Tirmek as far as power level and intellect. A born leader Sagas is a popular boy, and is often selected as commander in group exercises even when upperclassstudents areon the teams. Despises Tirmek for his status as rogue clan, and the shame his aunt and mother brought to the Sirinon, but mostly its because Tirmek is the only one in his age group who equals him as far as tactical ability.

Associations - Tellowas male were-tiger elf ardent(energy/shadow&light/mental power)

Sentinel, spy, and pastry chef. This one is a friendly rival of both Elina, and Sarah, he sees their shadow abilities as a direct challenge to his own, and is constantly developing new tactics to deal with them. Rarely transforms prefering to rely on his humanoid form. Uses katana, powers/jutsu, shurikan, kunai, and if pressed will use a partial change technique to weild tooth, and claw.



Bezen - Male shifter (swiftwing, razorclaw) Angelbound (Dominant, Berzerk, Light) druid (shifter racial varient)

A powerful young man with a flair for the dramatic, Bezen is a fair match for Sarah or Elina. Not very cerebral, Bezen relies on Sagas for planning prefering to rely on intuition to deal with each situation as it comes.


OOC: Ok ratslinky?
rampant

04-27-07, 02:56 AM		Elina - These are not elemental orbs, they are marbles with glitter on them.

Tirmek - 5 out of 6 Sarda's can't tell the difference.

Elina - Good enough for me.

Sarah - You're just getting him to lead the way to Sarda so you can use Lily-doken on him in order to watch Lily die first aren't you.
Charles Phipps

04-27-07, 03:39 AM		Outside Motoya's Cave

Lilly: Wait, those aren't marbles! THOSE ARE INFINITY GEMS!

Tirmek: What?

Lilly: They bestow omnipotence on whoever bears them!

Tirmek: Oh please, if they were then I'd wish you out of existence.

*Lilly goes poof*

Tirmek: YES!

Narrator: In that moment Tirmek realized ultimate power and proceeded to cast down the gods. Defeating the Rakashasa host and resetting reality in his own image, Tirmek raised Sarah to the status of his co-ruler while finding Elina a not Spoony lover. Mighty became the legend of Tirmek and it spread throughout the cosmos....

Later, in the Cave

Sarda: Dammit! My cake went flat. Oh well, better reverse time til when it wasn't.

*Tirmek blinks as he finds himself once more before Lilly*

*The Infinity gems short out*

Lilly: Something wrong?

Tirmek: :blink:

Lilly: Tirmek?

Tirmek: :twitch:
rampant

04-27-07, 03:42 AM		Lily - I was happy:( I was dancing on your grave:weep: I was ripping ravanna's teeth out and using them to cut off his hands one joint at a time. DIEEEEE! *starts strangling Lily*

Lily - gak gak
Charles Phipps

04-27-07, 03:45 AM		OOC: That is such a wonderful yet evil idea.

IC:

*Sarda pops his head out of the cave*

Sarda: Bah, more guests. I especially hate when I know they're coming, which is always since I'm omniscient.

Sarah: Oh hello!

*Lilly fights Tirmek on the ground, brutally rolling about*

Sarda: :sigh: Just come on in, you can let Calvin and Hobbes fight a bit.

Elina: I think Tirmek is upset.

Sarda: Well, he's just realizing that this entire universe was created to hurt him.

Sarah: What do you mean?

Sarda: Well, you see, Tirmek didn't eradicate Lilly. He sent him back before the Universe existed.

***

Before the Dawning of Creation

Lilly: Woah, everything is dark and stuff.

Sarda: What, who the hell are you? I'm about to create a universe here!

Lilly: You know we could really use some light around here.

*The Universe is created in a blinding explosion*

Sarda: Stop that! You're ruining very delicate work here! The universe can't just be created without purpose!

Lilly: You mean like hurting Tirmek?

*All of reality shifts and alters, guaranteeing Lilly's birth in the future*

***

Sarah: :blink:

Elina: So, what you're really saying is....Tirmek created Lilly?

Sarah: And Lilly is God?

Elina: No wonder the universe doesn't make any sense.

Sarda: And for that, I already am disinclined to help you in any way that doesn't cause enormous pain.
rampant

04-27-07, 03:52 AM		Tirmek - You're next Sarda! DIE YOU LITTLE SPOON******!

Lily - *starts turning blue*
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-27-07, 08:48 AM		OOCrystalforged: Alright, show of hands, who saw this coming a mile away? (raises hand)
OOcat: :raincloud
**********
Roy is sitting in a tent, pouring over a map of the Talenta Plains and Valenar, places on the plains marked with various pins denoting attacks by the Valenar. Rina enters the tent and salutes.

Rina: Sir, the troops you requested are ready for your inspection and training.

Roy: Excellent.

Rina: King Steve also sent a notice. Apparently in honor of his new holiday, Waroween, you are to go into some neighboring country and demand they hand over goods, and if they don't give in you are to rape and murder. Emphasis on the rape part. In fact, he says to start the rape now—

Roy: D***IT, I'm not gay!

Rina: No one was saying you were, sir.

Roy: But the only woman around is you, General.

Rina: :blush: Ah, yes, sir.…………You mean no women have joined up?

Roy: (goes to the entrance of the tent and looks out at the assembled soldiers) I can't see any.

Rina: (notices several) They aren't making a effert to disguise themselves.

Roy: I don't see any miniskirts. I specifically ordered that female dress code be changed to tiny miniskirts when I became Fürher.

Rina: *adjusts miniskirt rather obviously* Well, you aren't Fürher at the moment.

Roy: But I d**n well am going to work to be it again, just like I did the first time.

Rina: Sir, you took over in a surrendipitous power vacuum.

Roy: Sound political strategy. Anyway, I don't see why there are so many men compared to women.

Rina: I think it has something to do with your requesting men specifically.

Roy: I'm not gay!………Aww, screw it, let's just get started.

Roy steps out of the tent. The milling soldiers quickly notice him. A seargent calls attention, and the recruits fall in rather haphazardly. Roy surveys them, noting that they mostly have the pasty faces and/or flabby bodies of desk clerks and other non-tough jobs.

Roy: :confused: What in Khyber? This is the best we could get?

Rina: I think King Steve has them all out fighting his random wars.

Roy: *sigh* I'm right back to my old position. (barking: ) All right, listen up, men!…and possibly women…You are here to defend your country and the country of our halfling friends against a dreaded manace: those triangle-obsessed Valenar elves. However, to diguise our actions here they shall be referred to by the code name The Huns. Today you begin your training in basic soldiering. Except that we don't have much time, so we will be running you through a training montage of martial arts stuff that no real armored soldier could ever pull off successfully. Now hop to it!

Training (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ETiGidzSOUw)
rampant

04-27-07, 12:41 PM		OOC: Ok cat? chrys? one of you needs to PM me with some data on kitten if you want her at open eye. Ratslinky you got enough info for your prankwar? luna cypher you dead or something?

Roosevelt - Your new poking stick is ready.

OORampant - :D
Crystalforged

04-27-07, 02:42 PM		I was planning to get Kitten into Open Eye, its just that I've kinda been putting off doing any major plotlines for the moment because I've got finals in two weeks so stuffs kinda piling up. I'll try to do something as soon as I've got time.
Lord Kale Fangblade

04-27-07, 03:33 PM		Lunch Time, Day 1 of the Prank War.
Operation: "Sammich"

Its a sunny day at Open Eye, just a usual lunch hour, the only sound is that of the students talking and eating. and in some cases, both at the same time. We see Sagas and his cronies laughing and chatting. the view suddenly zooms out to across the lunch hall, to a balcony.

Gaz: *lowering his spyglass* Target sighted.

Sithis: I see-

Gaz: no you dont. you dont even have spy glass.

Sithis: *sigh* I meant it as in, " I understand".

Gaz: Oh... right. you should be clearer on these things.

Sithis: *brushing a strand of hair from his eyes* So, whats the plan?

Gaz: as you know, Sagas enjoys the perfect sandwitch every lunch time. Made by his own personal cheff and everything. its the holy grail of Sandwitchs. if it was a diamond, it would be a flawless creation the size of a my head

Sithis: Gaz. get on with the plan.

Gaz: *exasperated look* fine, well, this lunch time he wont exactly be "Enjoying it" well, not when he finds out what i've done to it anyway.

Sithis: *long pause* .... what have you done to it?

Gaz: i belive this would be best explained by an image crystal. *throws Sithis the crystal*

Sithis Catches it, and begins viewing the images contained.

Sithis: seems normal to m- :OMG! :gah: :yuck: *Begins vomiting*

Gaz waits patiently for Sithis to finish vomiting. Sithis finishes, though he's still a little green.

Sithis: you sick :censored:

Gaz: you wanted my help.

Sithis: so how are you going to tell him what you did to it?

Gaz: *smirk* same way i did with you.

Sithis beings to say somthing but gaz cuts him off.

Gaz: Its time! * raises the spy glass to his eye*

Sagas is shown, having eaten half of his sandwitch, A courier appears with a package in hands. Sagas puts down his sandwitch, signs the offered clipboard and picking up the sandwitch for another bite opens the parcel. then, activating the crystal takes a bite.

Sagas: :blink: :mymy: *stops chewing* :shocked: :gah: :OMG! :yuck: * Is violently sick*

Vision moves back to Sithis and Gaz, who are rolling around on the floor with laughter.

Sithis: *whiping a tear from his eye* That. was. Helarious.

Gaz: oh man. his face was so priceless. thank the gods i recorded it.

Sithis: i dont think he'll be eating any sandwitches in a hurry.

both burst out laughing again
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-27-07, 03:33 PM		@ rampant: OOC: I pretty much leave Kitten to Crystalforged.
rampant

04-27-07, 04:30 PM		OORampant - What did you put in his sammich?
------------------------------------------------------

Prankwar Day two:

Gaz - (covered in honey and feathers) I must say rigging your lab with fly paper was pretty ingenious.

Sithis - (in bat swarm form tangled in said flypaper) Squeeek

Tirmek - (painted pink) why am I up here? and how did they catch you gaz?

Gaz - The ninja planted a honey filled mine in my desk.

Scene zooms out to show the three strung up on a flagpole, Tiirmek and gaz are upside down.
Lord Kale Fangblade

04-27-07, 05:10 PM		OOKale: Thats classified.

IC:

Prank War:Day Two, Later on that day.
Operation: Payback.

Sagas walks up to his locker, pauses, then sends a minion to open it for him while he stands far away. theres a small explosion, unleashing a billowing cloud of tiching powder that consumes the unfortunate student.
Sagas smiles, only to notice somthing at his feet. another Alchemical explosive on which reads.

The return of Bastard industries's Best selling Glue/itching powder bomb.
THE STICK AND ITCH MK2!,
Four times Itchier, Four times stikeier and Gauranteed to last at least two times longer.
Bastard Industries, Making a Better prank.

Beneath that he notices somthing chalked onto it,
" Smile for the image Crystals."

Sagas: oh sh-

KABOOOOMMMM!!!

not only does it unleash the Soverign Glue/ Kithle brand itching powder contense, but everyones favoirte canniblistic changeling also added his own personal touch to the bomb. needless to say, The hall ( and Sagas) has now been redecorated in many different colours.
ratslinky

04-27-07, 07:35 PM		OORatslinky: Thanks rampant thats plenty

IC:

Prank War Day Three
Operation: Sticky

Gaz, Tirmek and Sithis are sitting in strategy class learning about defensive aerial battles.

Tirmek: Hey Gaz where is Sagas?

Gaz: Just a min I'll find out *Takes out an scrying mirror* G2 report in

Gaz 2: *Appears on the scrying mirror* G2 here G1

Gaz: Whats the status on S?

Gaz 2: Still stuck to the roof that new glue of M's is great not even Universal Solvent can get it off

Gaz: Good get his arms stuck together then use the Super Pox Powder on him

Sithis: Super Pox Powder?

Gaz: Magical Chicken Pox in powdered form it lasts for a month and gives super itch when we tested it on a mouse it lost most of its skin in the first week
Paulon

04-27-07, 07:43 PM		OOKale: Thats classified.

The reaction explains why those big fast food chains go out of their way to keep their secret recipes secret doesn't it? ;)
luna18moon

04-27-07, 08:02 PM		OOC: I'm not dead, I just can't think of anything most of the time. :raincloud
rampant

04-27-07, 08:14 PM		Tirmek - Don't get me involved with this Gaz.
DragoonDarkfire

04-27-07, 08:38 PM		We see Buckrill and the Lord of Egg Beaters inside a giant temple.

Buckrill: So what is the secret about Warforged?

Lord of Egg Beaters: While the first Warforged hosted Quori spirits, the titans later discovered a powerful influx of a powerful Soul Energy. This Soul Energy was used by Rilkans and Skarns for ages but the Titans found another use for it.

Buckrill: They MADE Souls for constructs?

Lord of Egg Beaters: Not so much made but simply harness existing Soul Energy. The source of power they used came from a location known as the Spring of Life, a place where the souls of all those who are to be born or created are formed. All living creatures that do not subside entirely on a single element or moral or ethical ideal are created from this spring of life.

Buckrill: Where is the Spring of life?

Lord of Egg Beaters: Ironically it is on the same plane of existence where the souls of the dead go. Dolurrh.

Buckrill: So the titans harnessed soul power and put it inside construct bodies?

Lord of Egg Beaters: Essentially, although some Warforged still carry Quori spirits inside of them, most of these Warforged either develop psionic powers or gain some empathetic ability with humans.

Buckrill: So how did the Giants sever the connection with Dal Quor?

Lord of Egg Beaters: I dunno. I never saw the Planar Gates actually close.

A Titan walks over.

Spar'tikus: Greetings. I am Spar'tikus.

Other Titan: NO I'M SPAR'TIKUS!

Spar'tikus whacks the other Titan with a hammer.

Spar'tikus: Ignore him. Everyone wants the name Spar'tikus.

Buckrill: So I see...

Spar'tikus: What brings you here? Spawn of madness?

Buckrill: Well me and Lord of Egg Beaters here kinda wound up here due to the stupidity of a friend.

Spar'tikus: Well we giants have recently discovered how to sever the connection of Dal Quor and destroy these nightmarish invaders.

Lord of Egg Beaters: what?

Spar'tikus: The words of True Speak. We have come to discover the word of True Speak that can shatter and send entire world out of ORBIT!

Buckrill: WOOOOW. What is it?

Spar'tikus: I cannot possibly speak it. That would doom us all.

Buckrill: Come on.

Spar'tikus: NO!

Buckrill: PLEASE!?

Spar'tikus: NO!

Buckrill: I'll yoddle.

Spar'tikus: OKAY! The word is... Ni

Buckrill: You're joking right? What kind of word of calamity is Ni?

There is a huge rumbling of the earth

Lord of Egg Beaters: Well there's your answer.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-27-07, 09:51 PM		Terra: Need a rest?

Motoko: After only five hours? Hell no!

Terra: Good.

-----

Silver: It's good to see her back in action. Motoko's not as experienced, but their pent up energy and frustration easily make up for it.

Bunny: Blah, blah, blah. Tell me when they're killing things again.

13: I'm pretty sure the type and intensity of what they're doing would be lethal to anyone normal and/or male...

Bunny: Shut up both of you! They just got the new batch of Redshirts in.

-----

Redshirt 1: Did they have to put a big target on the front and back?

Redshirt 2: At least yours is new. I think this one's 90% blood stains.

Redshirt 3: What was with that Old Dwarf Lady anyway? She doesn't seem to fit in with a crew of bloodthirsty pirates.

Redshirt 1: I hear they've even let kids on board. This place has gone soft lately.

Redshirt 3: I dunno man. I've heard some pretty scary :censored:. They call them the Second Generation. Most are the spawn of the freaks that have survived and even thrived here.

Redshirt 2: You're both full of crap. I'm gonna go find me a hiding spot before I get disembowled or something. *begins walking away*

*KABOOOOOOOOMMM*

Redshirt 2: *cough* What the hell?

Redshirt 3: Why do I feel pretty?

Redshirt 1: I think the question is why are we now dressed as schoolgirls?

Deis: Hi.

Redshirt 3: :hides:

Redshirt 1: Dude, chill. It's just a kid.

Redshirt 3: We're you NOT listening?!

Deis: :D I learned a new spell today!

Redshirt 2: :ahem: Is that why we're now dressed like this?

Deis: Oh, no. I figured out how to do this a while ago. I just needed my test subjects to be properly attired.

Redshirt 3: I'mgonnadieI'mgonnadieI'mgonnadie... *ad infinitum*

Redshirt 2: :rolleyes: What's she gonna do to us? Ask us to play with her dolls?

Deis: Not exactly. :devil: Evan's Black Tentacles of Forced Intrusion

All three Redshirts: :OMG! :OMG! :OMG! AAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!

-----

Bunny: :tantrum: Dammit! Someone die already!

13: :emp: You have done well, my young apprentice...
Paulon

04-27-07, 10:18 PM		OOPaulon to the redshirts: At least nobody seems to have taught her the spiked variation yet.
rampant

04-27-07, 11:02 PM		OOPaulon to the redshirts: At least nobody seems to have taught her the spiked variation yet.

Dies - Thus the wise sorcerer always carries scrolls.

Redshirts - :weep:
rampant

04-27-07, 11:52 PM		Elina - Ok to avoid a repeat of the last 57 towns. Tirmek will keep lily busy while we get the info.

Tirmek - *crunch maim kill*

Lily - whimper

Elina and Sarah walk into the dwarf settlement with fake beards taped on.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-28-07, 12:11 AM		Deis: On to more improtant things. You.

OOKaizer: Yes?

Deis: Liar.

OOKaizer: What ever do you mean? :angel:

Deis: You said this was the cool version.

OOKaizer: I'm more frightened of your mother than I am of you.

Deis: I WANT SPIKED TENTACLES DAMMIT! *TACKLE*

OOKaizer: GAH!

-----

Teiza: What's with the signs?

Momo: He got tired of not being able to communicate properly.

Scias: *holds a sign that reads* I stole the feat "Panda-san's Communication"*. Allows me to instantly write what I want to say so I don't have to stutter so much.

Teiza: Uh...huh...

OOKazier: Let go!

Deis: GIMMIE!

OOKaizer: NO!

Deis: GIMMIEGIMMIEGIMMIEGIMMIEGIMME*fades off down the hall*

Momo: *sigh* :nonono:

*Indirect reference to something I hope at least some of you recognize.
rampant

04-28-07, 12:28 AM		Sarah - Ok the earth orb is being held by a lich, and his emo vampire son.
---------------------------

Nalfein - Why am I wearing purple?

Sithis - I AM NOT EMO!
Paulon

04-28-07, 02:02 AM		The three redshirts, still dressed in their school uniforms, tied down and 'intruded upon' by the tentacles, are left on the deck as Deis assaults OOKaizer. Shortly thereafter their dignity is further damaged as they realise a young woman is addressing them.

Woman: That looks uncomfortable. If you want me to try to get those things off you, blink.

The breeze raised by the resultant blinking is intense enough that the woman has to take a step back to regain her balance. She nods at the response, and reaches out her hand towards the tentacles, muttering something under her breath. They swipe at her, but crumble to dust as they make contact with the woman's clothing, freeing the redshirts from their 'embrace'.

Woman: I'd advise avoiding whatever did that to you. I've seen some twisted spells in my time, but that was probably the nastiest. Now...

She is interrupted as the redshirts start running.

Woman: Ahem. *waves her hand, stopping them in their tracks*

Redshirts: :eek:

Woman: Before you go, can you please give me directions to the captain's quarters?

The redshirts gabble out directions, for which they are thanked before the woman releases them. As they run for cover, she heads below decks, looking for Captain Jarlot.

******************
OOPaulon: There's a start on that character intro I've occasionally said I'll do. Hopefully more tonight or tomorrow.
rampant

04-28-07, 04:10 AM		Teiza is adding some finishing detail to Sarah's armor by channeling energy through a narrow tip of her crystal. Sparks dance, while Teiza works she wears more of her crystal as lenses for her eyes. Teiza halts and steps back.

Momo takes a look.

Momo - I think we got it to spec Teiza, but i'm worried about the joints on the wrists, maybe we should mod them so they mesh better with her gauntlets.

Teiza - Good idea.

Momo - Where's Scias?

Teiza - I sent him to fetch some augment crystals, I have an idea for our next project.

Momo - And the blonde 'forged?

Teiza - Got her a job at Erks.
----------------------------------

Chi - Chi?

Erk - Cute kid,but you still gotta mop newbie.
Charles Phipps

04-28-07, 06:22 AM		OOC: Huh, no one did any Sarda conversation. Surprising.

IC:

Sarda: Thats because they're afraid of me.

Elina: That's enough Tirmek.

Tirmek: STOP...MAKING...YOUR...FORTITUDE...SAVE!

Lilly: *gasps for breath*

Sarda: Very well. I have some good news.

Tirmek: Really?

Sarda: Hell no. You idiots are going to have to find the Elemental Dragon Orbs to balance all the crazy magical energies that are flying around reality because of the FF's many adventures

Lilly: Couldn't you do it? Being omnipotent and all.

*Sarda stares at Lilly then snaps his fingers*

Tirmek: GRMPFUNGLE *coughs up digestive track*

Sarah: Oh my gods!

*the horrifically pained Tirmek signs 'Lilly did it! Moron'*

Sarda: Yes, but I don't like orange stripes. I swear, let in one of you and the whole neighborhood goes to Hell.

Elina: How will we find them?

Sarda: How should I know? Now get off my lawn and go back to your crappy Pirate ship.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-28-07, 08:41 AM		Sithis - I AM NOT EMO!
OOcat: True, but your E.B.N.E. is the most frequent violator of the Drammadar, so we figure that counts for something.
Chi - Chi?

Erk - Cute kid,but you still gotta mop newbie.
Erk: I'd also ask you to introduce yourself to everyone, but seeing as how your language hasn't been translated I gathered them up for you.

Lucky: Oooo, I bet you'd make a cute boy.

Tony: It's GRRRRRRRRREAT to meet you.

Mr. T: Ah pidy the foo who underestimates ya.

NJ26: Hey, another animé person.

Mendova: Oh, great, she's cute. :bored:

Jingo: ……

Saberiel: :drool:

Dandelion: :blink:…………Are those ears?
luna18moon

04-28-07, 11:23 AM		OOC: The 'Panda-san's Communication' feat sounds like the signs Ranma's father makes in Ranma 1/2.
IC:
Shred: Okay Brea. You won, so I'll take you to the Feline Extraplanar dance.
Brea: :embarrass :cloud9:
Shred: (i.h.h.) I'm going to kill Rip and Tear...
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-28-07, 12:25 PM		Shred: (i.h.h.) I'm going to kill Rip and Tear...
Bunny: I should be so lucky.
rampant

04-28-07, 12:26 PM		Sarda: Yes, but I don't like orange stripes. I swear, let in one of you and the whole neighborhood goes to Hell.

Tirmek - *sucks organs back in* ORANGE! I'M NAZARUNE BLACK!

Lily - fo' shizzl-

CRUNCH

Tirmek - NO! Lily just don't go there.

Elina - He can't go anywhere with his tendons cut.

Tirmek - That's why I cut them.

Lily - *wheeze*

Elina - You know actually cutting out his vocal chords might be an improvement.
-----------------------------------------

OOC: This is officially a new plotline free zone. Charles has indicated that the new thread starts once we reach page 200. No new plotlines people.

Prohibitar (inevitable of unusual situation enforcement, Read the guy no-one liked so he got the crap one-shot jobs.) - INDEED!
Kaizer_Ryu

04-28-07, 01:25 PM		OOC: Huh, no one did any Sarda conversation. Surprising.OOC: Wanted to, but couldn't think of anything funny.
Sarda: How should I know? Now get off my lawn and go back to your crappy Pirate ship.Lilly: Don't you mean the flying Deathtrap?

Sarda: *snaps his fingers*

Tirmek: GLORPH! *throws up digestive tract* *again*

OOcat: True, but your E.B.N.E. is the most frequent violator of the Drammadar, so we figure that counts for something.OOKaizer: (i.h.h.) Should I be jealous or happy they concentrate on him and not me?

*various introductions*Chi: Chi? *begins looking for something*

Erk: Anyone want to try and teach her to communicate prope-

Saberiel: ME! *anime zip over to Chi*

Erk: *sigh* Fine.

Chi: :confused: Chi?

*secret passageway door opens in the wall*

Scias: N-n-n-n-nuts. W-w-w-wrong p-p-p-p...................place.

Chi: :cloud9: Chi! *grabs him and snuggles*

Scias: :eek: :embarrass

Saberiel: :mad:

Erk: Seems she's attached to the boy. He was the first thing she saw upon awakening, so it's good for him he's not a bumbling highschool student.

OOC: The 'Panda-san's Communication' feat sounds like the signs Ranma's father makes in Ranma 1/2.OOC: :D

Ranma 1/2 is amusing most of the time, but the signs always crack me up for some reason.
rampant

04-28-07, 02:44 PM		Teiza - Mine *GLARE*

Chi is paralyzed with fear, while Teiza hefts Scias up by the scruff of his neck and walks out.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-28-07, 04:02 PM		Erk: ……it's good for him he's not a bumbling highschool student.
13: Grrrrrrrrrr.
Scias: N-n-n-n-nuts. W-w-w-wrong p-p-p-p...................place.

Chi: :cloud9: Chi! *grabs him and snuggles*

Scias: :eek: :embarrass

Saberiel: :mad:
Teiza - Mine *GLARE*

Chi is paralyzed with fear, while Teiza hefts Scias up by the scruff of his neck and walks out.
13: :blink:……………………Oh, hoh-hoh-hoh yeeeeeeeeeesssssss. :devil:

OOC: I did that outloud immediately upon seeing rampant's post.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-28-07, 04:46 PM		Scias: *holds up a sign that reads* I'M FIVE FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!!!

-----

Stewie: You! Redshirt!

Redshirt: Yes sir?

Stewie: Cut my eggs!

Redshirt: *does so* Your eggs are cut, sir.

Stewie: Cut my milk!

Redshirt: I can't, sir. It's liquid.

Stewie: IMBICILE! First freeze it, THEN cut it! If you question me again I'll put you on diaper detail. And I promise I won't make it easy on you!

Butters: Golly gee, I'm not sure I'll ever get used to this.

Kenny: Mmm phrrm hmmphfer.

Butters: You said it. The Redshirts don't really seem to have any standing at all here. Almost makes me feel sorry for them.

Stewie: I beg to differ. :devil: *rings three hand bells of different tones*

Three Redshirts appear and stand at attention.

Stewie: You! *points at a Redshirt* Bring me the Wall Street Journal! *the Redshirt runs off* You and you! *points at the other two* Fight to the Death!

One grabs a nearby bottle and smashes it, the other grabs a curtain rod as they proceed to beat the life out of each other. At one point, the bottle-weilding Redshirt picks up a fire poker and chucks it at the other one, missing him but impaling Kenny.

Butters: Oh my Dad! They killed Kenny!

Stewie: :emp: :evillaugh
rampant

04-28-07, 05:14 PM		Teiza - I'm seven whats that got to do with anything, when we're in the middle of a project you are supposed to be working!

Scias - (writes quickly) Project?

Teiza - The augment crystals fuzz brain!

Scias - *squiggle* I got those already.

Teiza - Now we need a test subject, one with something like my crystals.

Scias - *squigle* Why not you?

Teiza - What's the point of siblings if I can't experiment on them. I'm thinking Rashour, Dorvos, or Corre, i don't think our anesthetic will work on grandpa or mommy.

Scias - *squigle* huh?

Teiza - Just bring out one of them on that mark there.

Momo is standing behind said mark with a giant metal hammer.

Scias - *sigh*

Corre pops in on the mark, as Momo swings a practice sword raps her knuckles and forces her to drop the weapon.

Terrek - Teiza how many times must we have this talk. You can't go around experimenting with your crystals unsupervised.

Teiza - That's why we need Corre.

Terrek - *sigh* What are you doing? explain it to Corre, ask if she'll allow it, then run it by your mother, your mommy, and me.
--------------------

Sorry for using the edit like this, trying to wrapp this up before the move.
SilvercatMoonpaw

04-28-07, 05:49 PM		Scias: *holds up a sign that reads* I'M FIVE FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!!!
Silver: We're not going to start that again, are we?
Kaizer_Ryu

04-28-07, 05:57 PM		Sorry for using the edit like this, trying to wrapp this up before the move.
*previous scene occupying this spot edited out of existance*

:P

Meh, I thought it was funny. Dorvos needs more use.
ratslinky

04-28-07, 07:49 PM		OOC: So will Charles be linking us to the new thread or will it be someone else? And what does the fact that Scias is five have to do with anything I mean this is the Forgotten Freedom. And Buckrill you have done some great posts in the last few pages an-

OORatslinky: Your just doing this to try to fill up space aren't you

OOC: No why would I do that that is the stupidest thing I ever heard of you see this thread is great and as much as I think the new one will be good I want this one to stay on for as long as possible

OORatslinky: Your doing it again and I bet you are going to do some meaningless edit so you can fill the space up

OOC: :shifty: Where did you get that idea?

OORatslinky: Gods I get sick of you sometimes
ratslinky

04-28-07, 07:51 PM		Hey I got it to page 200 :dancin: :w00t: :king:
Kaizer_Ryu

04-28-07, 08:07 PM		OOC: So will Charles be linking us to the new thread or will it be someone else?OOC: Last time he just started a new thread and let us all know. It'd be in the same forum as this and the first one, so no real need to link.

And what does the fact that Scias is five have to do with anything I mean this is the Forgotten Freedom.
OOC: We're crazy, not icky.

Well...not that kind of icky, anyway. Need to at least wait till he's old enough to make informed decisions and have enough experience to know what those are.

Sarah: :ahem:

You need to figure that out on your own. Talk to your little boy/girlfriend about it. I've got too many points against me with this crew already and I do NOT need Ketty mad at me.
rampant

04-28-07, 08:48 PM		Dorvos - HMMMMM (I don't wanna be a ginuea pig!)
----------------

After much parental red tape and such.

Corre - Why can't I get the Earrings?

Teiza - Because Mother won't let us get any piercing or Tattoos until we're 13.

13 - ?

Teiza - Not you.

13 - oh ok then

Corre - Ok so I just put on this bracelet and use my crystal to make a claw?

Teiza - Slam works aswell.

Corre loops a fine adamant chain over her left wrist, from the chain dangles a small metal feather.

As the claw forms over Corre's left hand it takes the shape of gauntlet whose fingers end in slender blades, on the back of the hand severalsharp feather-like projections create a small sheild.

Corre - Cool, but I could already do that.

Teiza - Ever since Granpa enhanced our crystals on our birthdays, I've been playing around with a few ideas.

Corre - That's why you had Terra shadow fuse yours.

Teiza - Precisely, this charm should make your slam/claw on that arm a defending weapon.
rampant

04-28-07, 11:08 PM		The idea wasn't to stop the posting, its to wrap up the current plot lines.
Kaizer_Ryu

04-29-07, 12:31 AM		OOKaizer: Aside from the quest for the Orbs, I've got nothing else to do before the switch. What about you guys?

Terra: We're good.

Motoko: Get back in here. I'm not done with you yet.

Terra: Yes ma'am...

-----

OOKaizer: Anything?

Momo: Nope.

Scias: I'm g-g-g-g............ *anime sweatdrop* ...good.

Chi: :cloud9: Chi~! *hug*

Scias: *scribble* Except for this.

Nina: Nothing here.

Deis: Can I have-?!

OOKaizer: No spiked tentacle version.

Deis: :raincloud

-----

Sarah: :bigeyes:

Tirmek: No.

Sarah: :bigeyes:

OOKaizer: So not gonna work this time.

Sarah: Awwww... :raincloud

Elina: :rolleyes: When are you two finally just gonna get it over w- Oof! *hit in the ribs*

Tirmek: ('pathing) Do NOT encourage her. I'm barely keeping her off me as it is.
Charles Phipps

04-29-07, 01:21 AM		I'm working on the switch over right now.

The post will explain things and give us a brief rundown of the new world.

Plus link to the wiki.
Paulon

04-29-07, 01:21 AM		OOPaulon: *sticks his head in* Law of nature. I've got time and inclination to post an intro, and we're holding off for the next thread. Go figure eh? :P
rampant

04-29-07, 01:29 AM		Murphy - Who do you think taught 13 and Kithle:P

Is anyone copying over the plot lines to the wiki?
Charles Phipps

04-29-07, 01:43 AM		http://www.prometric.com.mx/serayala/images/Supergirl.jpg
http://www.jdevito.com/images/heroes/DC-Supergirl-Poster_Large.jpg

Eh, I was distracted by Supergirl pictures.

Sarah: Hey the pictures of me in costume!
Paulon

04-29-07, 01:52 AM		Murphy - Who do you think taught 13 and Kithle:P

A bigger bastard than Murphy?

Is anyone copying over the plot lines to the wiki?

I'm not even sure that the RULES have been updated since Lisa and Terra's wedding preparations, where Jarlot is forbidding attempts to kill the guests.
Charles Phipps

04-29-07, 02:02 AM		FYI, the next update will contain an introduction that should be transcribed to the Wiki.

I hope people will enjoy it.

Also, anyone know what year it is in the game?

edit: post up.

Hopefully, people will appreciate my depiction of Eberron.
Enlong

05-09-07, 09:14 PM		OOC: ((Hopefully I won't be shot on sight for asking but, is there any way I could join this game?))
Kaizer_Ryu

05-09-07, 09:46 PM		OOC: ((Hopefully I won't be shot on sight for asking but, is there any way I could join this game?))
OOC: We've moved here (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=838014) since this one's gone on for 200 pages. We're always looking for new mea-...er :shifty:, new posters.

Take a look at the wiki Charles linked to in the opening to give you an idea of who's who and what's going on, read up on what we have so far on the 3rd incarnation of the Forgotten Freedom, and make your mark.
Enlong

05-09-07, 09:54 PM		OOC: We've moved here (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=838014) since this one's gone on for 200 pages. We're always looking for new mea-...er :shifty:, new posters.

Take a look at the wiki Charles linked to in the opening to give you an idea of who's who and what's going on, read up on what we have so far on the 3rd incarnation of the Forgotten Freedom, and make your mark.OOC:Alright Czar Dragon (mind if I call ya that? 'cause that is sooo the eldest form of your name) I just wanna know; Is a Wilder acceptable, and what level do we start with? Or does none of that matter and I am just woefully uninformed as to the actual mechanics of the Forgotten Freedom? I mean, it's still a DND game, right?
Kaizer_Ryu

05-09-07, 10:10 PM		OOC:Alright Czar Dragon (mind if I call ya that? 'cause that is sooo the eldest form of your name)OOC: *shrugs* Sure.

I just wanna know; Is a Wilder acceptable, and what level do we start with? Or does none of that matter and I am just woefully uninformed as to the actual mechanics of the Forgotten Freedom?Yes.

The Wiki explains how all of that can be true at the same time. :D

I mean, it's still a DND game, right?:shifty:

Think Eberronian D&D, mix in random elements of the other settings, combine it with heavy doses of Final Fantasy, the Marvel/DC Universe, Anime, Transformers, multiple webcomics, any suitably epic-yet-humorous movie you can think of (The Princess Bride, Pirates of the Caribbean, etc), and MST3K.

Make sure to add a pinch of "give Elminster a quick and embarrasing death" every so often.

We go from there.
Crystalforged

05-10-07, 02:10 AM		I don't know I would call it d&d anymore, it may resemble some sick, twisted, take-it-out-behind-the-barn-and-shoot-it, god-kills-a-kitten-everytime-we-post version of it, but there are some fundamental differences. I mean we don't follow the rules of d&d, or Eberron for that matter, we just kinda use it as a vehicle for the story. At this points stats don't matter, we just do whatever seems cool or funny. You can really do anything you want with the only rules being if you screw with someone elses character or plot you better be prepared for retconning/horrible retribution. The whole thing has really taken on a life of its own and is kinda hard to discribe.
Charles Phipps

05-10-07, 02:37 AM		OOC: The current state of Eberron is described in the opening post of the third thread.
Enlong

05-10-07, 07:30 PM		OOC: So it's not an actual DND game, but a horrible abombination, where levels and stats mean nothing, storytelling and roleplaying rule the day, and humor is king? Oh my, I want to play it even more now! I've got a character concept, and should have an intro posted sometime soon.

edit: Actually, Kaiser Ryu said the wiki would tell me what I was asking up there, but I saw no actual mechanics, just "the rules". Hilareous as they are, they don't actually tell me how the game is played, so should I just assume that it's more RP then RPG?
Paulon

05-10-07, 11:20 PM		Just roleplaying. It's a little hard to put any kind of game stats on, to pick two examples, an insane guy who's not only capable of destroying the world but just hasn't yet because he wants it to mature first so it sounds right when it breaks, or a mass-murdering paladin (yes, he's supposed to be good) so stupid he managed to beat a god by being too dumb to be scared of him despite everything the Shadow could think of to do to torture him.

Edit: Oh yes. Might pay to discuss this in the new thread (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=838014). That's what it was created for after all. :)
Kaizer_Ryu

05-10-07, 11:39 PM		edit: Actually, Kaiser Ryu said the wiki would tell me what I was asking up there, but I saw no actual mechanics, just "the rules". Hilareous as they are, they don't actually tell me how the game is played, so should I just assume that it's more RP then RPG?
Sorry if there was some confusion. We don't bother with mechanics. Most of us tried earlier on, but it just got in the way of the funny. Things really took off when we stopped. I meant that by reading the wiki for the crew you'd get an idea of what we do and how we do it. That, and reading what's gone on in the 8 pages so far in the new thread.

Something to keep in mind as you participate. In essense, we're writing a big comic book.