Post/Author/DateTime	Post
Mulkr 02-14-07, 05:06 PM	I just learned about this demented and freggin' awesome weapon from that 1001 weapons thing, and i had to write something about it on here! It deals lots of damage, can be used with a sheild, and just sounds demented. It's a whip with nine magically preserved squirrels at the end that, when you swing the whip, all claw and bite the guy you hit! If you hit a crit., they start eating it(a.k.a trolls can't regenerate a limb lost because of a crit. with this thing!) Anybody think they could give me advice on where this thing can best be used. At the moment i have a barbarian swinging it at everything so he can look a bit demented. After all, he has 9 rabid squirrels swirling around hitting people and ripping their arms off! heres the stats: cost: 8gp per squirrel Weight: 9.5 lbs. Damage: 1d6 per squirrel/ peircing and bludgeoning Crit: 19-20/x3 If you think this is about the funniest weapon you've ever heard of, please say so. It's the only reason i even wrote this thread. (That, and nobody ever answered my other threads. They are: 1001 weapons: i just loved this thread before 1001 sheild and armor ideas: just for a twist
savant_warlord13 02-14-07, 06:23 PM	Interesting, but the squirrels wont last long, even if you don't use the weapon. And if you do use the weapon, they should be dead in a few swings. By the way, it does way too much damage for squirrels, and the rabies apparently isn't even contagious.
Mulkr 02-14-07, 06:36 PM	1. i meant rabid as in extremely vicous. 2.They're magically animated, and magically immortal. They are dead squirrel bodies that magically are invincibly bodied and bite and claw when they hit things. 3.I got the weapon from someone else. 4. the squirrels basicallyare zombie squirrels who can bite many, many times in the 6 seconds they have when they hit. Thats why the damage is so high. 5. please, this is supposed to be extremly funny, not some kind of realistic weapons. They are, after all, undead immortal squirrels. So don't tell me that i need to change a million things because someone else goofed up in your opinion. thanks for the article though.
Bluebrush 02-15-07, 09:21 AM	What I want to know is where you're carrying it and where you're keeping it at night. For the love of all that is holy, don't keep it on your belt.
crimsonwolf 02-15-07, 10:04 AM	imagin trying to sunder this thing :D or a disarm attempt by throwing nuts on the ground
Mulkr 02-15-07, 06:02 PM	At night he knocks all the squirrels out then bounds and gags them. Hes swinging it at most living creatures he see outside of the party. Also, sundering undead squirrels would be hilarious! imagine, they cut the squirrel in half, and it regrows and keeps biting while the part on the ground starts crawling away. Lol!:D
Voldar_Mecorthio 02-15-07, 09:55 PM	I think that owls and hawks would get a +5 circumstance bonus when trying to sunder it.
Waterhammer 02-16-07, 12:22 AM	I think that owls and hawks would get a +5 circumstance bonus when trying to sunder it. And small boys with beebee guns. Mr thesarus says feral would have been a better choice of words than Rabid in this case. :teach:
Mulkr 02-16-07, 08:03 AM	I don't care about Mr. Thesaurus. Some idiot brought a thesaurus to a game because he didn't think the DM was using exciting enough words, so we burned the thesaurus and kicked him in the shin, then killed off his character in the game. L-O-L!
Apowerfulfoe 02-16-07, 03:57 PM	Are you like.....12?:rolleye2:
Mulkr 02-16-07, 04:57 PM	Im 16 you sorry little...:mad:
HellflameArcanite 02-16-07, 05:38 PM	I actually kind of like the idea as comic relief...I wouldn't use it in a campaign of course, but I like it. Of course, that doesn't really carry as much weight as I'd like it to given that I'm 13 years old...
Voldar_Mecorthio 02-16-07, 08:07 PM	Never underestimate the comedic potential of RPGs. Where else can you find tiny lizardmen who are allmighty, giants who can throw pluto, midgets who can hide from you when they're ten feet away from you in the middle of the desert, and enormous lizards who could easily conquer the world who choose to use their power to kidnap sheep?
Thor_axe_impaler 02-17-07, 12:38 AM	Even if you could enchant these squirrels in such a way, it would probably be of necromantic quality--not really a problem when your swinging squirrels on a rope-- but the closest anyone has gotten to immortalyity is lich-dome. And a lich has a fairly frail body, meaning these squirrels would not last more than one hit (especially in the hands of that barbarian). Even if you could figure that out, they would be incredibly expensive, every time they needed replacment.
Mulkr 02-17-07, 09:45 AM	If any of you would read the original post you would notice that i didn't make this thing up! so stop yellin at me and start yellin at the guy who made it up! jeez! Also, the closest anyone has ever reached to immortality is being a god! perhaps there divine squirrels! who knows?
dengarbountyhunter 02-17-07, 05:29 PM	Bah. Cat o' nine tails, cat o' nine squirrels... We use tails o'nine cats. Tie nine cats by the tail, tie tails to a long rope, and you have the best reach weapon ever.
Mulkr 02-20-07, 07:05 PM	funny dengar... so funny i forgot to laugh.
Willie the Duck 02-20-07, 08:43 PM	If any of you would read the original post you would notice that i didn't make this thing up! so stop yellin at me and start yellin at the guy who made it up! jeez! You're the one that brought it here. You're the one that said hey look at this, this is so cool! comments? you're also the only person here who thinks this is an argument. The rest of us are having fun thinking about the endless possibilities of zombie-animal weaponry. You're also the one who seriously needs to upgrade their social skills and start acting like a member of a community. The only person who personally questioned your validity was Apowerfulfoe, and s/he only did so by questioning your maturity after you made an anecdote about committing violence and property damage towards a fellow gamer for being a minor pedant.
Mulkr 02-20-07, 09:09 PM	Sorry.