Post/Author/DateTime	Post
7Archdevil7 05-05-07, 03:37 AM	Suppose you run a campaign with characters who want to begin from scratch,they want to begin from commoners to be more specific.You,as a dm don't like at all their choice and to punish them you throw a a colossal venim devastating beetle (128hd-epic level handbook)which attacks their village. Unfortunately for you,its acid cloud doesn't reach them,so they,in a strange way,want to kill it.You are convinced that they will be killed. The combat begins.The first PC attacks with a stone,but he/she doesn't surpass the beetle's Ac(72).At that time the beetle has already killed half of the village's population.You are proud of your creature ...when the second PC attacks with another stone.He luckilly rolls 20d and says "Oh god,that's a critical hit".Then he rolls another 20d and then rolls a third 20d.He has done a certain kill with just ONE STONE. In my opinion such an event is impossible but... Any doubt or question???
CryoSilver 05-05-07, 03:50 AM	Triple 20s as insta kill is a house rule, not a core rule.
7Archdevil7 05-05-07, 04:02 AM	But it can be used in such campaigns between friends can't it?
CryoSilver 05-05-07, 04:02 AM	It could be, but then you have to deal with stuff like commoners killing epic monsters in one hit.
7Archdevil7 05-05-07, 04:05 AM	It's not so easy to roll triple 20s all the time you know.
Kouk 05-05-07, 06:10 AM	What was the point of this by the way?
CantripN 05-05-07, 07:02 AM	It's not so easy to roll triple 20s all the time you know. Oh, really? That happens about 1/8000 times. Given, say an army of 50,000 each with 5 attacks, it might well happen. Now, if only PCs get to do that, then yeah.
runestar 05-05-07, 08:09 AM	In theory, a commoner could prevail, but it requires the right eq. Basically a combination of dust of sneezing/choking and candles of invocations...:D
EvilVegan 05-05-07, 09:48 AM	Well. Sure it dies (if that's how you roll). But they don't get any XP for it. You only get CR for creatures that are within 7 CR of you. And it doesn't have any treasure. So. . . no gain. Just bragging rights. And think about fables involving a guy that kills something way too hard for him (7 with one stroke, Jack the giant-killer, etc). Big things are going to be expected of these commoners now. REALLY BIG.
Mirtek 05-05-07, 09:55 AM	But it can be used in such campaigns between friends can't it? In such a campaign between friends you can also use a house rule that a commoner never misses and kills anything with a single hit. But what's the point?
Merestil Haye 05-05-07, 11:25 AM	I'd let them have the xp. They go to 2,999xp and lose the rest. Of course first they'd have to explain how a rock that did exactly zero damage to the creature still killed it - not even a max value crit will get through the beasts's DR.
EvilVegan 05-05-07, 12:15 PM	It hit a pressure point or it went through one of the monsters enormous spiracles and choked it to death. Technically an insect of that size is completely physically impossible and maybe the rock knocked some sense into it and reminded it that it can't exist at that size unless the atmosphere is almost 100% oxygen. Which would result in nearly world-wide flash fires. . .
MCage 05-05-07, 12:30 PM	well thats going to be a lvl 20 commoner quite quickly
Someone 05-05-07, 12:30 PM	The words "campaign between friends" and "didn't like their choice and decided to punish them" don't really go together. Its like inviting the over for a "game of poker between friends" then throwing your shoe at them because they went all in on a king-8 off suit.
Tsuul 05-05-07, 12:40 PM	You,as a dm don't like at all their choice and to punish them you throw a a colossal venim devastating beetle (128hd-epic level handbook)which attacks their village.You really should have used alley cats. One for each. That series of 20s woulda felt great for a moment before they got slaughtered by something so mundane and low.
Holy_Beholder 05-06-07, 12:43 AM	It hit a pressure point or it went through one of the monsters enormous spiracles and choked it to death. Technically an insect of that size is completely physically impossible and maybe the rock knocked some sense into it and reminded it that it can't exist at that size unless the atmosphere is almost 100% oxygen. Which would result in nearly world-wide flash fires. . . I can just see it: Player: I cast fireball to see what it does DM: rolls Player: What are you doing DM: rolling fortitude for the 100% oxygen atmosphere Player: What the :censored: DM: Critical 1, now I get to roll for all living life.
PhaedrusXY 05-06-07, 02:12 AM	I nominate this for "stupidest thread EVAR".
EvilVegan 05-06-07, 10:05 AM	I bet the commoners could beat the devastation beetle with uranium katanas.
wal9000 05-06-07, 10:26 AM	I bet the commoners could beat the devastation beetle with uranium katanas. What if it was a DMPC with a uranium katana? :P
EvilVegan 05-06-07, 10:54 AM	I don't think beetles have the skills necessary to wield katanas, let alone uranium ones. Unless it was an awakened vermin devastation beetle with ninja levels...
CryoSilver 05-06-07, 02:19 PM	I don't think beetles have the skills necessary to wield katanas, let alone uranium ones. Unless it was an awakened vermin devastation beetle with ninja levels... Or had a railgun that fired katanas strapped to it.
EvilVegan 05-06-07, 02:33 PM	Ninja devastation beetle riding a flying shark dual-wielding four railguns attached with chains that fire flaming uranium katanas? And I'm done.
wal9000 05-06-07, 03:49 PM	Ninja devastation beetle riding a flying shark dual-wielding four railguns attached with chains that fire flaming uranium katanas? And I'm done. You win the internet for today. Have a :cookie:.
Jaxgaret 05-06-07, 05:03 PM	Any doubt or question??? Just a quote. "Multiple exclamation marks are a sure sign of a diseased mind." - Terry Pratchett Not exactly applicable here, but close enough :) Also, cookies for EvilVegan. That was quite the humorous hijack.
Drachasor 05-06-07, 06:35 PM	I don't think beetles have the skills necessary to wield katanas, let alone uranium ones. But it can be used in such campaigns between friends can't it?
Stardust 05-07-07, 06:48 AM	What if it was a DMPC with a uranium katana? :P I'd only allow it if they were playing their alignment correctly, but not if they were a fighter, 'cause fighters are too underpowered, especially compared to warblades.
Forged_Fury 05-07-07, 06:58 AM	You win the internet for today. Have a :cookie:. ...and I think this thread deserves the wise words of Makeshiftwing's Theory of the Katana there is nothing funny about katanas. do u realize that they fold the steel in a katana seventeen million times when making it? the edge of a real katana is so sharp that it could cut through the earth, and that is why Japan is just an island now. the katanas that are still around today that most people think are real are just fake ones because the real ones were all destroyed because samurais had honor and had to fall on their swords and then break them and they could only be broken in this special way that samurais were taught but i have a real one and it is still sharp even though i cut a tree once with it just because my friend didn't believe i could lol. i saw this show on the history channel once and steven hawking or someone said that a real katana was so sharp it could cut thru a black hole. i came up with stats for katana for dnd and my dm said no because he is stupid and said the rule already is there that its a bastard sword but that is so stupid because a real katana can cut thru a thousand bastard swords and also is so light that it is faster than a dagger or anything, even sound but maybe not light except if you are really strong. anyway the rule didn't work because a katana would need to have like a four hundred sided dice to roll, and every number on the dice would have to be a million, and my dm said they don't make those or something which is so stupid hopefully they will make one for 4th edition.
Thorsbjorn 05-07-07, 07:56 AM	I bet the commoners could beat the devastation beetle with uranium katanas. :rofl: Originally Posted by Makeshiftwing there is nothing funny about katanas. do u realize that they fold the steel in a katana seventeen million times when making it? the edge of a real katana is so sharp that it could cut through the earth, and that is why Japan is just an island now. the katanas that are still around today that most people think are real are just fake ones because the real ones were all destroyed because samurais had honor and had to fall on their swords and then break them and they could only be broken in this special way that samurais were taught but i have a real one and it is still sharp even though i cut a tree once with it just because my friend didn't believe i could lol. i saw this show on the history channel once and steven hawking or someone said that a real katana was so sharp it could cut thru a black hole. i came up with stats for katana for dnd and my dm said no because he is stupid and said the rule already is there that its a bastard sword but that is so stupid because a real katana can cut thru a thousand bastard swords and also is so light that it is faster than a dagger or anything, even sound but maybe not light except if you are really strong. anyway the rule didn't work because a katana would need to have like a four hundred sided dice to roll, and every number on the dice would have to be a million, and my dm said they don't make those or something which is so stupid hopefully they will make one for 4th edition. This was so funny I had to get up from the computer and go in the other room to stop myself from choking, and I had tears in my eyes. This comes close to being the funniest thing I've experienced in four and a half decades! :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:
Devlonir 05-07-07, 08:12 AM	:rofl:This was so funny I had to get up from the computer and go in the other room to stop myself from choking, and I had tears in my eyes. This comes close to being the funniest thing I've experienced in four and a half decades! :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl: What's so funny about it? It's all true :P
Forged_Fury 05-07-07, 08:38 AM	This was so funny I had to get up from the computer and go in the other room to stop myself from choking, and I had tears in my eyes. This comes close to being the funniest thing I've experienced in four and a half decades! :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl: As did I when I first read it. I sigged it for posterity. The absurdity is sublime. I still think he should have added a few "teh"s in there, but the run-on sentences pretty much make up for it. -FF