+1 broom of smite dragon [Archive] - Wizards Community

+1 broom of smite dragon [Archive] - Wizards Community

Post/Author/DateTime Post
Zeddicus_Ralh
09-15-03, 03:16 PM My group and i were playin this weekend when a particularly funny thing happened. we were informed of this dragon thing that we had to kill ( great details i shall not give, dont wanna write all day). it was a dwarf cleric of Moradin who told us, he was the head of a group of clerics in the montains trying to find and slay the thin, but he rushed back to the temple to help care for the head priest( no details, jus bear with me in my total vagueness) after he told the story he went about some small duties of cleaning and what not. we told him he had to come with us, he refused, we argued( basically, our DM didnt want us to have him) then our wizard had an idea, he pulled out his 'ol book-o-spells and cast summ mon III, called a jinnie(sp?) and payed it to transport us all to the top of the mountain, cleric and all. as soon as we get there the cleric starts to b i t c h. "what the hell good am i going to do with just a broom?" thats right, the clric had dropped his weapons when he began to sweep the temple, so his only weapon now was a broom. fast frm to the big dragon fight, all this guy could do was cast his devine spells, he did heal us a little, but basically he was a waste of space. so we are fightig this dragon, and we are doing pretty dang good, too. and our cleric only has 1 spell left, so in his turn our DM mimes what the clric does, "the cleric takes the broom, breaks it in too, turns it around to use the pointy end, and cast bless weapon on it", now he has a +1 holy broomstck, yay him. our DM grabs his dice, rolls, and crumples to the ground in the most horrible laugh u have ever heard! the dragon had been smoten. a COLLASOL dragon had been downed his a simple peasant broom. we laughed, for a long time.

does any1 else have wierd or funny things that have happened in their campaigns worth noteing? i like to laugh!
Desies
09-16-03, 01:33 AM It was summon monster VI out of his staff. And the broom didn't kill the dragon your monk did....the broom just happened to do max damage and nearly kill it.
Zeddicus_Ralh
09-16-03, 05:26 PM r u sure, i coulda sworn that the cleric killed it, not me, but either way, i wanna know funny story's, come on ppl, lets hear them.......................yes, this is a bump.
Dat' Big Dragon
09-16-03, 06:59 PM I had this campaign i was in once. It was great, run well and all, even though it had 12 players but that was OK. Anyway, we were comprised of a bunch of assorted races and classes, a few arcane casters, fighter types, and such, but we had this problem about having a bunch of people new to the game. We did all right but if anything that was a little bit scary came our way ew didn't do as enirely well as we should have. But to shorten the story here I go... One of the PC's ended up dieing (not suprising) and we had to take his finger with us, but at the end of the adventure we had no money to bring him back, so we offered to do a quest for the diety of the cleric providing the sevice to us. He accepted, but the quest came with a catch. The character had to use an +3 avenging spork of doom. On a successful hit the target had to make a save or be under an advanced version of a sleep spell while the spork also enacted a random effect like that of a rod of wonder. The weapon was preety good except that was the only one that the char was allowed to use until the quest had been completed! Now that doesn't sound so bad but since the party made the offer we were force to help due to a gaes/quest spell that was craftily placed at the resseruction. The goal? To destroy a horde of demon posessed gingerbread men. Not as easy as it sounds either. Those things were really hard to kill! Well thats my story, let's put more up people.
Zeddicus_Ralh
09-17-03, 02:24 PM hahaha.....possesed gingerbread men.........hahahahah, *cough*bump*cough*...................spo rks, he he he he!
Desies
09-18-03, 10:47 PM my god...sporks of death? What the hell?!!!
Dannerus Maximus
09-19-03, 10:48 PM What the hell?!!!

That's what I said when I read this post.
TheDarkestOfAngels
09-19-03, 11:59 PM I had a friend with a character in my party with a really high strength score.
Well, he he wasn't able to reach a BBEG we were fighting and he didn't have a ranged weapon. He pulled out his grey bag of tricks and proceeded to chuck animals at the BBEG. The DM ruled that only his strength would apply to the damage and this eventually killed him.
True story. Its a bit vague, but it happened quite a long time ago and I was only half paying attention at the time.
Dat' Big Dragon
09-21-03, 02:46 AM LOL great story man, something similar happens to me all the time cuz i usually rely on a single combat type. really funny to hear i'm not the only one tho!
wanderingminstrelnasheen
09-21-03, 01:01 PM Okay.
This one session, me and my group (I was a Jester named Jack, and there was a Paladin named Richard, and an elven Mage named Silvra, possessing of a harp/bow- which played a beautiful chord whenever an arrow was fired) were chasing a gnomish spy named Neb, with a CLOAK OF SPIDER CLIMB. We had spotted a gnomish theif in a crowd and called out "Neb! Stop you theif!", of course he ran. We pursued him to a candy shop in our local city (Survale Ford in Tethyr) and we lost him. While Silvra distracted the proprietor of the store, a rotund high-pitched elderly lady, Richard and I searched the place. Our pursuit lead to a back room, that was, the bathroom. Actually it was a dark room with a central pit in the floor for human waste. Richard had a torch and I illumiated my sword with a LIGHT spell. Our search of the wall yeilded only one small chink, a keyhole, with no door that we could see. Richard kept looking in here while I went to get Silvra. While in the shop I decided to help myself to a little bit of the goods therein, we were after all perforing a service, and I deserved sugary compensation. Silvra and I went to the back room, and there he spotted on the ceiling, our prey. He notched an arrow, and Richard was about to take a swing at him with his long sword, when into the room burst the fat woman screaming, at an unbelievably high pitch, "thieves! Thieves! THIEVES!!!" her voice getting higher with each cry. She barreled toward me, but I leapt out of the way. Unable to slow herself she crashed into Richard, sending the both realing into what we affectionately titled, the Sh*t Pit. Richards torch promptly set the whole thing ablaze, and he was pinned under the fat woman, who resembled in appearence and action, a turtle on it's back. He yelled for Help and I was about to leap in to save them, as any heroic jester would, when I realized doing so would get my uniform dirty. So I quickly stripped down, leaving my clothes in a neatly folded pile in the corner and leapt in. Silvra this whole time was taking unsuccessful shot after unsuccessful shot at the gnome with his bow, beautiful music pouring from his weapon all the while (In hindsight I realize his misses were probably due to the fact that both light sources were in the pit, but he was an elf, he should have made those shots anyway). I pulled the woman out of the pit, with the aid of Richard frantically pushing from below, and extinguished her, then started to pull Richard out. The problem with this is, Jesters aren't particularly strong, and Paladins wear plate-mail, so instead of Richard coming out I went in. Silvra at this point had gotten ONE successful hit against the gnome who was scurrying all over the ceiling and walls. He followed the trail of blood drops, leading him to te key hole, where there was now a key, with a gnome attatched to it. The wall opened and the gnome crawled down the tunnel, no way any of us could fit in a gnome crawl space. Remembering, finally, that he was a mage, Silvra cast a CHARM PERSON on the thief and ordered him to come back. He did so, just in time to see me and Richard finally pulling ourselves from the pit, both covered in charred human excrement.
We later learned that this was the wrong gnome. His name was Joel, and he was just a common pick-pocket, making this all for naught, but Jack still had clean clothes... And some sweet, sweet candy!
Zeddicus_Ralh
09-23-03, 02:30 PM Wow! not only did u get candy, u got to roll around in human waste, sum groups get all the luck, all my DM ever gives us is magic weapons and money................and lots of horribly strong monsters. u think, "Wow, what a kick but weapon, i am gonna be untoachable!" but then u fight a dragon and realize that the weapon is the only thing that saved u. we never get the upperhand, our DM gives us just what we need to survive, so u can imagine our terror when we stumble upon artifacts!.....................,........ ..... scary stuff!
wanderingminstrelnasheen
09-23-03, 02:59 PM Yeah, our group is wary of Magical items too. We know our DM only gives them to us so he can take them away. We have come across a whole lot of cool stuff, 90% of which was A) Taken away B) Stolen C) Destroyed or lost in some other heart-breaking fashion. Oh well, If nothing else, that game is the most enjoyable one I've ever played in.
Fredegar The White
09-23-03, 03:39 PM My second character and most beloved until now is "cough" "cough" Legolas son of Elifir a elven thief in Ashabenford Mistledale.(Don't laugh the character was made 7 years ago under the direct influence of the books and not i repeat not the Hollywood monstrocity that Jackson guy made!)
My other co players were an elven fighter, an elven wood elf amazon, a cleric of Tyr, a Dwarf fighter and a paladin.

One day i was drinking, with the dwarf, at the bar of the Blue Ear Inn when an enraged elven fighter and an ugly painted tattooed elven woman walked in and tried to beat me up because i was the one, as they said, she gave her virginity and abandoned her. Just as i was gonna get hit by that ogre in a woman's body the paladin and the cleric got in and stopped the fight. Needles to say i was happy about it and then spent some time talking to the
good priest.

I noted his expensive possesions, heard that he was planning to take a room at the inn and said goodbye! ;) That night i returned to the inn and drunk with the dwarf. I left later and went to the back of the inn. Now there were 2 rooms with windows and i couldn't remember the room the priest was in. My DM rolled it for me and sure of myself i started clinbing the for the left window. When i got to the window i heard snoring. Aha i said out in my mind and got into the room.

It was dark. The bed hid a massive figure snoring! When i got close to it the Amazon opened her eyes and stood up! I started screaming (she had a Cha 9 me thinks) and headed for the window! Two steps from my salvation from that elven Catoblepas she grabbed me and threw me out! I landed beside the Dwarf who was ******* all the beer he drunk when a bathtub (wooden) fool of dirty water landed on me! I took it off my head and the dwarf laughing started ******* on me while she was looking out the window cursing me in a stream of elven curses!

We had a hell of a laugh that night and when the next day the party got together we had a lot more!
wanderingminstrelnasheen
10-08-03, 03:40 PM Wow. my guy may have rolled in feces, but you were urinated on by a PC? That's just un-civilized.
Trevelyn RedScale
10-17-03, 02:43 AM just a second of back ground info. Im our games we have somthing caled a feat of heroic strength. in short, 1 roll no modifiers if you can roll a natural 20 then you can do almost anything. ie a guy wanted to punch a boulder and break it silently. here is the wind up and the swing,.. 20 it works the boulder is dust. Now there is also a draw back, if you don't get the 20 than every bone in the character's body is instantly turned to gravel. now to the story
lvl4
a guy tries a feat of heroic str. to punch through a 1/2 inch thick wall. he rolls a 16. his whole skeleton is little chuncky bits. the party ties his body into a sack on a half orc's back sorta like c3po the party is retreating from a room full o uglies. he has a hand crossbow with hemlock in his hand and has to roll con. checks to avoid passing out due to pain. as they are running away he fires a single shot his con. check is natural 20, the bolt flies 100 yds down a tunnel past the host of enemies to hit the main evil guy of the campaign, hits his armor, for 1 point of damage. his fortitude vs the hemlock he gets a nat 1 and dies, the surrounding troops all roll 1 on their moral and jump into a pit and die

the party is victorious for the entire campaign thanks to 1 shot from a cripple:smirk:
wanderingminstrelnasheen
10-17-03, 12:14 PM Wow. Pretty crazy. Pretty crazy feat too.
Also, how did a hand crossbow go 100+ feet? Its range is thirty. Just curious.
Amaranthine
10-17-03, 04:26 PM It's range increment is 30.
It's max range is 300.

Post/Author/DateTime	Post
Zeddicus_Ralh 09-15-03, 03:16 PM	My group and i were playin this weekend when a particularly funny thing happened. we were informed of this dragon thing that we had to kill ( great details i shall not give, dont wanna write all day). it was a dwarf cleric of Moradin who told us, he was the head of a group of clerics in the montains trying to find and slay the thin, but he rushed back to the temple to help care for the head priest( no details, jus bear with me in my total vagueness) after he told the story he went about some small duties of cleaning and what not. we told him he had to come with us, he refused, we argued( basically, our DM didnt want us to have him) then our wizard had an idea, he pulled out his 'ol book-o-spells and cast summ mon III, called a jinnie(sp?) and payed it to transport us all to the top of the mountain, cleric and all. as soon as we get there the cleric starts to b i t c h. "what the hell good am i going to do with just a broom?" thats right, the clric had dropped his weapons when he began to sweep the temple, so his only weapon now was a broom. fast frm to the big dragon fight, all this guy could do was cast his devine spells, he did heal us a little, but basically he was a waste of space. so we are fightig this dragon, and we are doing pretty dang good, too. and our cleric only has 1 spell left, so in his turn our DM mimes what the clric does, "the cleric takes the broom, breaks it in too, turns it around to use the pointy end, and cast bless weapon on it", now he has a +1 holy broomstck, yay him. our DM grabs his dice, rolls, and crumples to the ground in the most horrible laugh u have ever heard! the dragon had been smoten. a COLLASOL dragon had been downed his a simple peasant broom. we laughed, for a long time. does any1 else have wierd or funny things that have happened in their campaigns worth noteing? i like to laugh!
Desies 09-16-03, 01:33 AM	It was summon monster VI out of his staff. And the broom didn't kill the dragon your monk did....the broom just happened to do max damage and nearly kill it.
Zeddicus_Ralh 09-16-03, 05:26 PM	r u sure, i coulda sworn that the cleric killed it, not me, but either way, i wanna know funny story's, come on ppl, lets hear them.......................yes, this is a bump.
Dat' Big Dragon 09-16-03, 06:59 PM	I had this campaign i was in once. It was great, run well and all, even though it had 12 players but that was OK. Anyway, we were comprised of a bunch of assorted races and classes, a few arcane casters, fighter types, and such, but we had this problem about having a bunch of people new to the game. We did all right but if anything that was a little bit scary came our way ew didn't do as enirely well as we should have. But to shorten the story here I go... One of the PC's ended up dieing (not suprising) and we had to take his finger with us, but at the end of the adventure we had no money to bring him back, so we offered to do a quest for the diety of the cleric providing the sevice to us. He accepted, but the quest came with a catch. The character had to use an +3 avenging spork of doom. On a successful hit the target had to make a save or be under an advanced version of a sleep spell while the spork also enacted a random effect like that of a rod of wonder. The weapon was preety good except that was the only one that the char was allowed to use until the quest had been completed! Now that doesn't sound so bad but since the party made the offer we were force to help due to a gaes/quest spell that was craftily placed at the resseruction. The goal? To destroy a horde of demon posessed gingerbread men. Not as easy as it sounds either. Those things were really hard to kill! Well thats my story, let's put more up people.
Zeddicus_Ralh 09-17-03, 02:24 PM	hahaha.....possesed gingerbread men.........hahahahah, coughbumpcough...................spo rks, he he he he!
Desies 09-18-03, 10:47 PM	my god...sporks of death? What the hell?!!!
Dannerus Maximus 09-19-03, 10:48 PM	What the hell?!!! That's what I said when I read this post.
TheDarkestOfAngels 09-19-03, 11:59 PM	I had a friend with a character in my party with a really high strength score. Well, he he wasn't able to reach a BBEG we were fighting and he didn't have a ranged weapon. He pulled out his grey bag of tricks and proceeded to chuck animals at the BBEG. The DM ruled that only his strength would apply to the damage and this eventually killed him. True story. Its a bit vague, but it happened quite a long time ago and I was only half paying attention at the time.
Dat' Big Dragon 09-21-03, 02:46 AM	LOL great story man, something similar happens to me all the time cuz i usually rely on a single combat type. really funny to hear i'm not the only one tho!
wanderingminstrelnasheen 09-21-03, 01:01 PM	Okay. This one session, me and my group (I was a Jester named Jack, and there was a Paladin named Richard, and an elven Mage named Silvra, possessing of a harp/bow- which played a beautiful chord whenever an arrow was fired) were chasing a gnomish spy named Neb, with a CLOAK OF SPIDER CLIMB. We had spotted a gnomish theif in a crowd and called out "Neb! Stop you theif!", of course he ran. We pursued him to a candy shop in our local city (Survale Ford in Tethyr) and we lost him. While Silvra distracted the proprietor of the store, a rotund high-pitched elderly lady, Richard and I searched the place. Our pursuit lead to a back room, that was, the bathroom. Actually it was a dark room with a central pit in the floor for human waste. Richard had a torch and I illumiated my sword with a LIGHT spell. Our search of the wall yeilded only one small chink, a keyhole, with no door that we could see. Richard kept looking in here while I went to get Silvra. While in the shop I decided to help myself to a little bit of the goods therein, we were after all perforing a service, and I deserved sugary compensation. Silvra and I went to the back room, and there he spotted on the ceiling, our prey. He notched an arrow, and Richard was about to take a swing at him with his long sword, when into the room burst the fat woman screaming, at an unbelievably high pitch, "thieves! Thieves! THIEVES!!!" her voice getting higher with each cry. She barreled toward me, but I leapt out of the way. Unable to slow herself she crashed into Richard, sending the both realing into what we affectionately titled, the Sh*t Pit. Richards torch promptly set the whole thing ablaze, and he was pinned under the fat woman, who resembled in appearence and action, a turtle on it's back. He yelled for Help and I was about to leap in to save them, as any heroic jester would, when I realized doing so would get my uniform dirty. So I quickly stripped down, leaving my clothes in a neatly folded pile in the corner and leapt in. Silvra this whole time was taking unsuccessful shot after unsuccessful shot at the gnome with his bow, beautiful music pouring from his weapon all the while (In hindsight I realize his misses were probably due to the fact that both light sources were in the pit, but he was an elf, he should have made those shots anyway). I pulled the woman out of the pit, with the aid of Richard frantically pushing from below, and extinguished her, then started to pull Richard out. The problem with this is, Jesters aren't particularly strong, and Paladins wear plate-mail, so instead of Richard coming out I went in. Silvra at this point had gotten ONE successful hit against the gnome who was scurrying all over the ceiling and walls. He followed the trail of blood drops, leading him to te key hole, where there was now a key, with a gnome attatched to it. The wall opened and the gnome crawled down the tunnel, no way any of us could fit in a gnome crawl space. Remembering, finally, that he was a mage, Silvra cast a CHARM PERSON on the thief and ordered him to come back. He did so, just in time to see me and Richard finally pulling ourselves from the pit, both covered in charred human excrement. We later learned that this was the wrong gnome. His name was Joel, and he was just a common pick-pocket, making this all for naught, but Jack still had clean clothes... And some sweet, sweet candy!
Zeddicus_Ralh 09-23-03, 02:30 PM	Wow! not only did u get candy, u got to roll around in human waste, sum groups get all the luck, all my DM ever gives us is magic weapons and money................and lots of horribly strong monsters. u think, "Wow, what a kick but weapon, i am gonna be untoachable!" but then u fight a dragon and realize that the weapon is the only thing that saved u. we never get the upperhand, our DM gives us just what we need to survive, so u can imagine our terror when we stumble upon artifacts!.....................,........ ..... scary stuff!
wanderingminstrelnasheen 09-23-03, 02:59 PM	Yeah, our group is wary of Magical items too. We know our DM only gives them to us so he can take them away. We have come across a whole lot of cool stuff, 90% of which was A) Taken away B) Stolen C) Destroyed or lost in some other heart-breaking fashion. Oh well, If nothing else, that game is the most enjoyable one I've ever played in.
Fredegar The White 09-23-03, 03:39 PM	My second character and most beloved until now is "cough" "cough" Legolas son of Elifir a elven thief in Ashabenford Mistledale.(Don't laugh the character was made 7 years ago under the direct influence of the books and not i repeat not the Hollywood monstrocity that Jackson guy made!) My other co players were an elven fighter, an elven wood elf amazon, a cleric of Tyr, a Dwarf fighter and a paladin. One day i was drinking, with the dwarf, at the bar of the Blue Ear Inn when an enraged elven fighter and an ugly painted tattooed elven woman walked in and tried to beat me up because i was the one, as they said, she gave her virginity and abandoned her. Just as i was gonna get hit by that ogre in a woman's body the paladin and the cleric got in and stopped the fight. Needles to say i was happy about it and then spent some time talking to the good priest. I noted his expensive possesions, heard that he was planning to take a room at the inn and said goodbye! ;) That night i returned to the inn and drunk with the dwarf. I left later and went to the back of the inn. Now there were 2 rooms with windows and i couldn't remember the room the priest was in. My DM rolled it for me and sure of myself i started clinbing the for the left window. When i got to the window i heard snoring. Aha i said out in my mind and got into the room. It was dark. The bed hid a massive figure snoring! When i got close to it the Amazon opened her eyes and stood up! I started screaming (she had a Cha 9 me thinks) and headed for the window! Two steps from my salvation from that elven Catoblepas she grabbed me and threw me out! I landed beside the Dwarf who was ***** all the beer he drunk when a bathtub (wooden) fool of dirty water landed on me! I took it off my head and the dwarf laughing started ***** on me while she was looking out the window cursing me in a stream of elven curses! We had a hell of a laugh that night and when the next day the party got together we had a lot more!
wanderingminstrelnasheen 10-08-03, 03:40 PM	Wow. my guy may have rolled in feces, but you were urinated on by a PC? That's just un-civilized.
Trevelyn RedScale 10-17-03, 02:43 AM	just a second of back ground info. Im our games we have somthing caled a feat of heroic strength. in short, 1 roll no modifiers if you can roll a natural 20 then you can do almost anything. ie a guy wanted to punch a boulder and break it silently. here is the wind up and the swing,.. 20 it works the boulder is dust. Now there is also a draw back, if you don't get the 20 than every bone in the character's body is instantly turned to gravel. now to the story lvl4 a guy tries a feat of heroic str. to punch through a 1/2 inch thick wall. he rolls a 16. his whole skeleton is little chuncky bits. the party ties his body into a sack on a half orc's back sorta like c3po the party is retreating from a room full o uglies. he has a hand crossbow with hemlock in his hand and has to roll con. checks to avoid passing out due to pain. as they are running away he fires a single shot his con. check is natural 20, the bolt flies 100 yds down a tunnel past the host of enemies to hit the main evil guy of the campaign, hits his armor, for 1 point of damage. his fortitude vs the hemlock he gets a nat 1 and dies, the surrounding troops all roll 1 on their moral and jump into a pit and die the party is victorious for the entire campaign thanks to 1 shot from a cripple:smirk:
wanderingminstrelnasheen 10-17-03, 12:14 PM	Wow. Pretty crazy. Pretty crazy feat too. Also, how did a hand crossbow go 100+ feet? Its range is thirty. Just curious.
Amaranthine 10-17-03, 04:26 PM	It's range increment is 30. It's max range is 300.