Do Chickens Exist? [Archive] - Wizards Community

Do Chickens Exist? [Archive] - Wizards Community

Post/Author/DateTime Post
khyron1144
03-13-07, 02:29 PM I checked the animals appendix in the back of my Monster Manual (3.0). As far as I can tell there is no entry for either chickens specifically or for small, flightless, domestic fowl generally.

This leads to an interesting question:
Do chickens exist?
Evil DM Mk3
03-13-07, 02:34 PM Yes, they are a trade good worth 2cp. Not an animal, a trade good.
Kain Darkwind
03-13-07, 02:34 PM No they don't, not in a fantasy world like Dungeons and Dragons allows you to play.

Specifically, you aren't legally allowed to play DnD if you plan on giving stats, unofficial or otherwise, to them. This is because of a clause in the bylaws that forbids the use of chickens in non-edible products, at least for the United States of America. It is possible that non-US countries are able to place chickens in their games.
Singer_of_the_Song
03-13-07, 02:35 PM They are the gamete stage of achaierai.
Evil DM Mk3
03-13-07, 02:37 PM So as the answers stand, yes, no and kinda.
khyron1144
03-13-07, 02:50 PM Yes, they are a trade good worth 2cp. Not an animal, a trade good.

Ok. I can accept that.

How does a DM go about killing a low level wizard with them in 3.x now that they are no longer animals with stats?
Witch
03-13-07, 02:55 PM The DM can stat them up ;)
Evil DM Mk3
03-13-07, 03:00 PM For a link style death, stat as a bat swarm, increase the base size a bit and reduce to clumsy flight...
smeagol_lied
03-13-07, 03:04 PM A chicken weighs a few lbs

A wizard has a few hitpoints

A catapult... And from there it writes itself
ArcTan
03-13-07, 03:06 PM Seriously, the animal section of the MM is woefully tiny compared to the number of animals that exist in real life. The problem is that in a world with fantasy monsters, the majority of animals aren't that interesting (to a fantasy gamer) and are pretty easy to kill. So you can represent a whole bunch of different animals just by tweaking a few useful animal stats around.

I mean, seriously, why do chickens need stats? You've seen chickens. You know how they flutter around and move around and crap. You don't need stats unless you want to see how well they would do in a battle, and the answer is "poorly". (In fact, it's because they gave housecats D&D stats that housecats are stupid in D&D, because if it has stats it has to do at least 1 point of damage on an attack, hence the "cat killing commoner" nonsense.)
yonman
03-13-07, 03:38 PM Make a Fiendish/Vampiric/Half-golem/Half-fey/Half-dragon/Lolth touched Chicken of Death and you'll have stats to make any PC run in Fear!
Kain Darkwind
03-13-07, 04:02 PM Chicken
Tiny Animal
Hit Dice: 1/2d8-1 (1 hp)
Initiative: +2
Speed: 20 ft., fly 10 ft. (clumsy)
AC: 10 (-2 Dex, +2 size), touch 10, flat-footed 10
Base Attack/Grapple: +0/-9
Attack: Peck -10 melee (1d2-5)
Space/Reach: 2.5 ft. /0 ft.
Special Attacks: Struggle
Special Qualities: Low-light vision
Saves: Fort +1, Ref +0, Will -1
Abilities: Str 1, Dex 7, Con 8, Int 1, Wis 9, Cha 4
Skills: Listen +1, Spot +1
Feats: Improved Initiative, Run*
Climate/Terrain: Any
Organization: Clutch (5-20)
Challenge Rating: 0
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always Neutral

Struggle: A chicken can deal 1d3-5 nonlethal damage in a grapple automatically, even on a lost grapple check.

Note: I use a variant rule for damage. Lethal damage reduced to negative damage deals 1 point of nonlethal damage, or 1 point of lethal damage on a critical hit. Nonlethal damage reduced to negative damage deals 1 point of nonlethal damage per two hits.

Nonlethal damage dealt in excess of twice a creature's hit points + 10 deals lethal damage. So a commoner with 4 hit points could suffer 28 points of 'cat bite' attacks before actually taking real damage, and would have to suffer 42 points of cat bite attacks to die from it. Which really, isn't that unrealistic. Even a human could die from that kind of mauling.
Dracomortis
03-13-07, 04:41 PM Chickens? What is this, some kind of made-up mythological animal? Next you'll be asking for stats for the chupacabra, I suppose. Tisk, tisk...gamers these days.
Evil DM Mk3
03-13-07, 04:45 PM Chickens? What is this, some kind of made-up mythological animal? Next you'll be asking for stats for the chupacabra, I suppose. Tisk, tisk...gamers these days.

Or rabbits. Silly idea is rabbits.
Domriso
03-13-07, 05:00 PM Ha ha ha...
In my campaign I have two versions of chickens. The first version is the usual boring chicken that can't really do anything except peck out your eyes. The second kind is a special secret in my campaign.
the chickens come from another multiverse. In that universe they are thedominant race, similar to humans, except that there are no other dominant races. They are magical beasts that manifest powers as a 20th level psion.
The reason they came to our universe is because they have a tendency to create things beyond their control. One of these things is P.O.J.O, a large sized, robotic chicken that can breathe magma (It's name stands for something but I can't exactly remember what). To escape their new creations, which accidently gained sentience, they fled to our universe and bred the race normally known as chickens. they keep themselves dispersed throughout the populous of the planet, keeping their secret a secret. They only reveal it under dire circumstances, and they usually follow it by erasing the memories of everyone that learned their secret.
It was very amusing to have chickes flying around disintegrating people while my players had no idea what was happening.

...I like chickens...
Tevish Szat
03-13-07, 05:04 PM For a link style death, stat as a bat swarm, increase the base size a bit and reduce to clumsy flight...

aaaah, cucos: domestic dire chickens
mvincent
03-13-07, 07:08 PM How does a DM go about killing a low level wizard with themSome methods:
1) Improvised weapon.
2) Falling object damage
3) Polymorph any object
4) Have a rival cleric buff himself by killing a chicken via deathknell
5) Animate object: chicken coop
6) Serve poisoned chicken for dinner
7) Have the wizard cast shield other on the chicken
8) Use raven (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/monsters/raven.htm) stats (without a flight speed) and attack with an infinite amount
9) Cast awaken on the chicken, then train it (epic barbarian levels if possible)
10) Have the wizard use it as a phylactery
11) Show the wizard what is really hiding in Baba Yaga's hut
khyron1144
03-13-07, 07:35 PM Chickens? What is this, some kind of made-up mythological animal? Next you'll be asking for stats for the chupacabra, I suppose. Tisk, tisk...gamers these days.

I have stats for chupacabra. It was in Dragon last year.
dengarbountyhunter
03-13-07, 08:27 PM Well, chicken stats are mainly used for rooster fights in my opinion.
What PC wouldn't want to bet on chicken fights? And please don't tell me "the Good-aligned ones, it's evil to pit animals against each others". You know, animal rights or cruelty against animals are REALLY recent concepts. It's like if I told you that eating animals is evil and creepy. Maybe it will be in hundreds of years, but it's not now.

I've yet to create a city where rooster fights are as important as gladiator fights in Ancient Rome... with leages of rooster trainers, and pedigree roosters, with talon blades and other cool stuff...

Edit: Hey, after a quick Net search, I found out that rooster fights were quite popular among Greeks and Romans. Cool.
Kain Darkwind
03-13-07, 08:49 PM Well, chicken stats are mainly used for rooster fights in my opinion.
What PC wouldn't want to bet on chicken fights? And please don't tell me "the Good-aligned ones, it's evil to pit animals against each others". You know, animal rights or cruelty against animals are REALLY recent concepts. It's like if I told you that eating animals is evil and creepy. Maybe it will be in hundreds of years, but it's not now.

I've yet to create a city where rooster fights are as important as gladiator fights in Ancient Rome... with leages of rooster trainers, and pedigree roosters, with talon blades and other cool stuff...

Edit: Hey, after a quick Net search, I found out that rooster fights were quite popular among Greeks and Romans. Cool.

:rolleyes: Are you under some impression that DnD morality is subjective, culturally or otherwise?
PhaedrusXY
03-13-07, 09:15 PM Aww.... it was archived (http://boards1.wizards.com/wotc_archive/index.php/t-132778). :bigeyes:
Holy_Beholder
03-13-07, 10:03 PM Chickens should be statted (and yes, they were, but this is backup),so **** fights would work.. Picture this. A chicken, wearing a chicken sized headband of intelligence, carrying a chicken sized magic wand in his claws, while he flies around assisted by a teleport spell and annihilates all the other chickens. Then the low level PC polymorphed into a chicken by the evil sorcerer running the **** fight duels them. Suddenly, it takes on life and death importance. And you can place huge bets on the enemy chicken, so you can pay a mage for true ressurection when the PC loses. Tell me thats not cool
Mindolin
03-14-07, 12:34 PM Reminds me of a Blackadder episode where the idiot of the group decided it would be a feasible, good idea to "get a mad, killer bull, stick some feathers on it, and hang an egg between it's legs, since no one would bet on such an odd looking chicken". I still prefer getting a high level monk polymorphed into the chicken. Think about it, you would still get the unarmed strike damage with a wing attack, and the only draw back would be the lowering of the damage dice and strength bonus. For some reason I'm beginning to hear the song "Teenage Mutant Kung-Fu Chickens" in my head.
Zumarai
03-14-07, 12:44 PM I plan on making an Anthropomorphic Chicken Monk (Cluck Fu?)
mvincent
03-14-07, 12:56 PM I plan on making an Anthropomorphic Chicken Monk (Cluck Fu?)[poorly lip-synced chickens]Your crispy wing technique is powerful, but you cannot hope to defeat my headless-running style. <cough><cough> [/poorly lip-synced chickens]:chicken:
Zumarai
03-14-07, 01:15 PM [poorly lip-synced chickens]Your crispy wing technique is powerful, but you cannot hope to defeat my headless-running style. <cough><cough> [/poorly lip-synced chickens]:chicken:

Like it, centurion, like it.

Have you heard about the decapitated chicken that continued to live for over a year (I'm serious)?

…Talk about a primitive central nervous system.
Evil DM Mk3
03-14-07, 01:21 PM No they can live for a very short time, a few mins at most. There was one chicken that was technically only half decapitated that lived for years, but his brain was mostly not removed. His head was cut off too high.
Zumarai
03-14-07, 01:23 PM No they can live for a very short time, a few mins at most. There was one chicken that was technically only half decapitated that lived for years, but his brain was mostly not removed. His head was cut off too high.

One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest comes to mind (pun intended).
Evil DM Mk3
03-14-07, 01:30 PM I should also note that thousands of cruel copycat attempts were made. They all died within a week.
Rickiel
03-14-07, 01:31 PM Thankfully, there's already one anthropomorphic chicken out there in the media for which we can use as both a reference and an inspiration.

Chicken Boo!

Of course if someone works stats off of Chicken Boo, anthro-chickens have a +10 Disguise bonus to look like human guys.
JoAT
03-14-07, 02:37 PM ...usual boring chicken that can't really do anything except peck out your eyes.

Even assuming halflings, that is one hell of big, scary chicken.
Domriso
03-14-07, 04:53 PM Originally Posted by JoAT
Even assuming halflings, that is one hell of big, scary chicken.

Wait, what?
Evil DM Mk3
03-14-07, 05:05 PM Wait, what?

For a chicken's beak to reach a halfing's eyes... BIG CHICKEN
Domriso
03-14-07, 05:42 PM Not if its on a higher surface. When I wrote that I really was thinking more of a huge mob of chickes knocking someone over and then pecking out their eyes... Of course at that point they also could probably just peck the person to death and eat their brain...
Hey! There we go! Half-illithid Chickens! For all your brain-eating poultry needs!
PhaedrusXY
03-14-07, 05:54 PM For a chicken's beak to reach a halfing's eyes... BIG CHICKENYou do know that chickens can fly, right? Also, the males (called roosters) have "spurs" that can be an inch to inch and a half long, and are quite sharp, on their legs.
Domriso
03-14-07, 05:59 PM That would also be painful.
Another fun fact is that chickens can be raised like humans. My aunt did that once. Pee-Wee (the chicken) would drink coffee and eat chips. It also liked chicken wings alot.
Scary cannibal chickens:D.
neilthrun
03-14-07, 06:04 PM Make a Fiendish/Vampiric/Half-golem/Half-fey/Half-dragon/Lolth touched Chicken of Death and you'll have stats to make any PC run in Fear!

Aaaah, reminds me of the fiendish phrenic dire rat that I used as a reoccuring encounter. It eventually took lvls in psychic warrior.
Raymond_Luxury_Yacht
03-14-07, 06:10 PM Chickens should be statted (and yes, they were, but this is backup),so **** fights would work.. Picture this. A chicken, wearing a chicken sized headband of intelligence, carrying a chicken sized magic wand in his claws, while he flies around assisted by a teleport spell and annihilates all the other chickens. Then the low level PC polymorphed into a chicken by the evil sorcerer running the **** fight duels them. Suddenly, it takes on life and death importance. And you can place huge bets on the enemy chicken, so you can pay a mage for true ressurection when the PC loses. Tell me thats not cool

Sounds like an episode of Samurai Jack.
Evil DM Mk3
03-14-07, 06:14 PM Sounds like an episode of Samurai Jack.

Well said Throughtwarbeler Mangrove.
El_Machinae
03-14-07, 08:17 PM I'm pretty sure these uber-beasts are slated for the Epic Level update.
JosephKell
03-14-07, 09:46 PM Based on Kain Darkwind's chicken

Paragon Chicken
Tiny Animal
Hit Dice: 1/2d8+18 (22 hp)
Initiative: +10
Speed: 60 ft., fly 30 ft. (clumsy)
AC: 47 (+6 Dex, +2 size, +12 insight, +12 luck, +5 natural), touch 42, flat-footed 41
Base Attack/Grapple: +0/-5
Attack: Peck +30 melee (1d2+23)
Space/Reach: 2.5 ft. /0 ft.
Special Attacks: Improved Bullrush, Struggle
Special Qualities: Cold Resistance 10, Damage Reduction 20/epic, Fast Healing 20, Fire Resistance 10, Low-light vision, Spell Resistance 28
Saves: Fort +16, Ref +13, Will +17
Abilities: Str 16, Dex 22, Con 23, Int 16, Wis 24, Cha 19
Skills: Listen +1, Spot +1
Feats: Improved Bullrush, Improved Initiative, Power Attack, Run*
Climate/Terrain: Any
Organization: Solitary (but it always seems to be the one you attack)
Challenge Rating: 18 (wtf?)
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always Neutral Evil

Struggle: A paragon chicken can deal 1d3+3 damage in a grapple automatically, even on a lost grapple check.
Improved Bullrush: A paragon chicken has a +12 modifier for bullrushing others (includes the +4 from Improved Bullrush).

I think it's hilarious that is has a CR of 18!
Singer_of_the_Song
03-14-07, 10:31 PM Sounds like an episode of Samurai Jack.

Samurai Jack FTW
Zumarai
03-15-07, 06:20 AM Well said Throughtwarbeler Mangrove.

I thought it was "Throat Wobbler"?
aotrscommander
03-15-07, 07:03 AM Consdiering Baleful Polymorph, and the fact my players and I have have played Dungeon Keeper, I find the lack of chicken stats - and rabbit and other generally weak creature stats - an oversight. When it occurs, we just use the raven stats (and ignore the flight).
Zumarai
03-15-07, 07:20 AM Consdiering Baleful Polymorph, and the fact my players and I have have played Dungeon Keeper, I find the lack of chicken stats - and rabbit and other generally weak creature stats - an oversight.

Me too, because I've been dying to play an ill tempered awakened hedgehog psion.
Mulkr
03-15-07, 05:19 PM Make a Fiendish/Vampiric/Half-golem/Half-fey/Half-dragon/Lolth touched Chicken of Death and you'll have stats to make any PC run in Fear!
:eek: :mymy: :twitch: :twitch: :twitch: :twitch: :twitch: :gah: :looloo: :OMG! :OMG! :88E:
You truly are a master of evil. Have a cthulu cookie.:88E: :cookie: :88E: :cookie:
JosephKell
03-16-07, 05:17 PM Oh yeah, the Multiheaded Template can add new Hit Dice to a creature (one of the only templates that does that).

So you could do a Paragon Multiheaded Chicken of Doom!

Each extra head is +2 HD. Awww... Chickens can only be two-headed (Up to Medium-size, max 1 additional head).

Post/Author/DateTime	Post
khyron1144 03-13-07, 02:29 PM	I checked the animals appendix in the back of my Monster Manual (3.0). As far as I can tell there is no entry for either chickens specifically or for small, flightless, domestic fowl generally. This leads to an interesting question: Do chickens exist?
Evil DM Mk3 03-13-07, 02:34 PM	Yes, they are a trade good worth 2cp. Not an animal, a trade good.
Kain Darkwind 03-13-07, 02:34 PM	No they don't, not in a fantasy world like Dungeons and Dragons allows you to play. Specifically, you aren't legally allowed to play DnD if you plan on giving stats, unofficial or otherwise, to them. This is because of a clause in the bylaws that forbids the use of chickens in non-edible products, at least for the United States of America. It is possible that non-US countries are able to place chickens in their games.
Singer_of_the_Song 03-13-07, 02:35 PM	They are the gamete stage of achaierai.
Evil DM Mk3 03-13-07, 02:37 PM	So as the answers stand, yes, no and kinda.
khyron1144 03-13-07, 02:50 PM	Yes, they are a trade good worth 2cp. Not an animal, a trade good. Ok. I can accept that. How does a DM go about killing a low level wizard with them in 3.x now that they are no longer animals with stats?
Witch 03-13-07, 02:55 PM	The DM can stat them up ;)
Evil DM Mk3 03-13-07, 03:00 PM	For a link style death, stat as a bat swarm, increase the base size a bit and reduce to clumsy flight...
smeagol_lied 03-13-07, 03:04 PM	A chicken weighs a few lbs A wizard has a few hitpoints A catapult... And from there it writes itself
ArcTan 03-13-07, 03:06 PM	Seriously, the animal section of the MM is woefully tiny compared to the number of animals that exist in real life. The problem is that in a world with fantasy monsters, the majority of animals aren't that interesting (to a fantasy gamer) and are pretty easy to kill. So you can represent a whole bunch of different animals just by tweaking a few useful animal stats around. I mean, seriously, why do chickens need stats? You've seen chickens. You know how they flutter around and move around and crap. You don't need stats unless you want to see how well they would do in a battle, and the answer is "poorly". (In fact, it's because they gave housecats D&D stats that housecats are stupid in D&D, because if it has stats it has to do at least 1 point of damage on an attack, hence the "cat killing commoner" nonsense.)
yonman 03-13-07, 03:38 PM	Make a Fiendish/Vampiric/Half-golem/Half-fey/Half-dragon/Lolth touched Chicken of Death and you'll have stats to make any PC run in Fear!
Kain Darkwind 03-13-07, 04:02 PM	Chicken Tiny Animal Hit Dice: 1/2d8-1 (1 hp) Initiative: +2 Speed: 20 ft., fly 10 ft. (clumsy) AC: 10 (-2 Dex, +2 size), touch 10, flat-footed 10 Base Attack/Grapple: +0/-9 Attack: Peck -10 melee (1d2-5) Space/Reach: 2.5 ft. /0 ft. Special Attacks: Struggle Special Qualities: Low-light vision Saves: Fort +1, Ref +0, Will -1 Abilities: Str 1, Dex 7, Con 8, Int 1, Wis 9, Cha 4 Skills: Listen +1, Spot +1 Feats: Improved Initiative, Run* Climate/Terrain: Any Organization: Clutch (5-20) Challenge Rating: 0 Treasure: None Alignment: Always Neutral Struggle: A chicken can deal 1d3-5 nonlethal damage in a grapple automatically, even on a lost grapple check. Note: I use a variant rule for damage. Lethal damage reduced to negative damage deals 1 point of nonlethal damage, or 1 point of lethal damage on a critical hit. Nonlethal damage reduced to negative damage deals 1 point of nonlethal damage per two hits. Nonlethal damage dealt in excess of twice a creature's hit points + 10 deals lethal damage. So a commoner with 4 hit points could suffer 28 points of 'cat bite' attacks before actually taking real damage, and would have to suffer 42 points of cat bite attacks to die from it. Which really, isn't that unrealistic. Even a human could die from that kind of mauling.
Dracomortis 03-13-07, 04:41 PM	Chickens? What is this, some kind of made-up mythological animal? Next you'll be asking for stats for the chupacabra, I suppose. Tisk, tisk...gamers these days.
Evil DM Mk3 03-13-07, 04:45 PM	Chickens? What is this, some kind of made-up mythological animal? Next you'll be asking for stats for the chupacabra, I suppose. Tisk, tisk...gamers these days. Or rabbits. Silly idea is rabbits.
Domriso 03-13-07, 05:00 PM	Ha ha ha... In my campaign I have two versions of chickens. The first version is the usual boring chicken that can't really do anything except peck out your eyes. The second kind is a special secret in my campaign. the chickens come from another multiverse. In that universe they are thedominant race, similar to humans, except that there are no other dominant races. They are magical beasts that manifest powers as a 20th level psion. The reason they came to our universe is because they have a tendency to create things beyond their control. One of these things is P.O.J.O, a large sized, robotic chicken that can breathe magma (It's name stands for something but I can't exactly remember what). To escape their new creations, which accidently gained sentience, they fled to our universe and bred the race normally known as chickens. they keep themselves dispersed throughout the populous of the planet, keeping their secret a secret. They only reveal it under dire circumstances, and they usually follow it by erasing the memories of everyone that learned their secret. It was very amusing to have chickes flying around disintegrating people while my players had no idea what was happening. ...I like chickens...
Tevish Szat 03-13-07, 05:04 PM	For a link style death, stat as a bat swarm, increase the base size a bit and reduce to clumsy flight... aaaah, cucos: domestic dire chickens
mvincent 03-13-07, 07:08 PM	How does a DM go about killing a low level wizard with themSome methods: 1) Improvised weapon. 2) Falling object damage 3) Polymorph any object 4) Have a rival cleric buff himself by killing a chicken via deathknell 5) Animate object: chicken coop 6) Serve poisoned chicken for dinner 7) Have the wizard cast shield other on the chicken 8) Use raven (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/monsters/raven.htm) stats (without a flight speed) and attack with an infinite amount 9) Cast awaken on the chicken, then train it (epic barbarian levels if possible) 10) Have the wizard use it as a phylactery 11) Show the wizard what is really hiding in Baba Yaga's hut
khyron1144 03-13-07, 07:35 PM	Chickens? What is this, some kind of made-up mythological animal? Next you'll be asking for stats for the chupacabra, I suppose. Tisk, tisk...gamers these days. I have stats for chupacabra. It was in Dragon last year.
dengarbountyhunter 03-13-07, 08:27 PM	Well, chicken stats are mainly used for rooster fights in my opinion. What PC wouldn't want to bet on chicken fights? And please don't tell me "the Good-aligned ones, it's evil to pit animals against each others". You know, animal rights or cruelty against animals are REALLY recent concepts. It's like if I told you that eating animals is evil and creepy. Maybe it will be in hundreds of years, but it's not now. I've yet to create a city where rooster fights are as important as gladiator fights in Ancient Rome... with leages of rooster trainers, and pedigree roosters, with talon blades and other cool stuff... Edit: Hey, after a quick Net search, I found out that rooster fights were quite popular among Greeks and Romans. Cool.
Kain Darkwind 03-13-07, 08:49 PM	Well, chicken stats are mainly used for rooster fights in my opinion. What PC wouldn't want to bet on chicken fights? And please don't tell me "the Good-aligned ones, it's evil to pit animals against each others". You know, animal rights or cruelty against animals are REALLY recent concepts. It's like if I told you that eating animals is evil and creepy. Maybe it will be in hundreds of years, but it's not now. I've yet to create a city where rooster fights are as important as gladiator fights in Ancient Rome... with leages of rooster trainers, and pedigree roosters, with talon blades and other cool stuff... Edit: Hey, after a quick Net search, I found out that rooster fights were quite popular among Greeks and Romans. Cool. :rolleyes: Are you under some impression that DnD morality is subjective, culturally or otherwise?
PhaedrusXY 03-13-07, 09:15 PM	Aww.... it was archived (http://boards1.wizards.com/wotc_archive/index.php/t-132778). :bigeyes:
Holy_Beholder 03-13-07, 10:03 PM	Chickens should be statted (and yes, they were, but this is backup),so ** fights would work.. Picture this. A chicken, wearing a chicken sized headband of intelligence, carrying a chicken sized magic wand in his claws, while he flies around assisted by a teleport spell and annihilates all the other chickens. Then the low level PC polymorphed into a chicken by the evil sorcerer running the ** fight duels them. Suddenly, it takes on life and death importance. And you can place huge bets on the enemy chicken, so you can pay a mage for true ressurection when the PC loses. Tell me thats not cool
Mindolin 03-14-07, 12:34 PM	Reminds me of a Blackadder episode where the idiot of the group decided it would be a feasible, good idea to "get a mad, killer bull, stick some feathers on it, and hang an egg between it's legs, since no one would bet on such an odd looking chicken". I still prefer getting a high level monk polymorphed into the chicken. Think about it, you would still get the unarmed strike damage with a wing attack, and the only draw back would be the lowering of the damage dice and strength bonus. For some reason I'm beginning to hear the song "Teenage Mutant Kung-Fu Chickens" in my head.
Zumarai 03-14-07, 12:44 PM	I plan on making an Anthropomorphic Chicken Monk (Cluck Fu?)
mvincent 03-14-07, 12:56 PM	I plan on making an Anthropomorphic Chicken Monk (Cluck Fu?)[poorly lip-synced chickens]Your crispy wing technique is powerful, but you cannot hope to defeat my headless-running style. <cough><cough> [/poorly lip-synced chickens]:chicken:
Zumarai 03-14-07, 01:15 PM	[poorly lip-synced chickens]Your crispy wing technique is powerful, but you cannot hope to defeat my headless-running style. <cough><cough> [/poorly lip-synced chickens]:chicken: Like it, centurion, like it. Have you heard about the decapitated chicken that continued to live for over a year (I'm serious)? …Talk about a primitive central nervous system.
Evil DM Mk3 03-14-07, 01:21 PM	No they can live for a very short time, a few mins at most. There was one chicken that was technically only half decapitated that lived for years, but his brain was mostly not removed. His head was cut off too high.
Zumarai 03-14-07, 01:23 PM	No they can live for a very short time, a few mins at most. There was one chicken that was technically only half decapitated that lived for years, but his brain was mostly not removed. His head was cut off too high. One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest comes to mind (pun intended).
Evil DM Mk3 03-14-07, 01:30 PM	I should also note that thousands of cruel copycat attempts were made. They all died within a week.
Rickiel 03-14-07, 01:31 PM	Thankfully, there's already one anthropomorphic chicken out there in the media for which we can use as both a reference and an inspiration. Chicken Boo! Of course if someone works stats off of Chicken Boo, anthro-chickens have a +10 Disguise bonus to look like human guys.
JoAT 03-14-07, 02:37 PM	...usual boring chicken that can't really do anything except peck out your eyes. Even assuming halflings, that is one hell of big, scary chicken.
Domriso 03-14-07, 04:53 PM	Originally Posted by JoAT Even assuming halflings, that is one hell of big, scary chicken. Wait, what?
Evil DM Mk3 03-14-07, 05:05 PM	Wait, what? For a chicken's beak to reach a halfing's eyes... BIG CHICKEN
Domriso 03-14-07, 05:42 PM	Not if its on a higher surface. When I wrote that I really was thinking more of a huge mob of chickes knocking someone over and then pecking out their eyes... Of course at that point they also could probably just peck the person to death and eat their brain... Hey! There we go! Half-illithid Chickens! For all your brain-eating poultry needs!
PhaedrusXY 03-14-07, 05:54 PM	For a chicken's beak to reach a halfing's eyes... BIG CHICKENYou do know that chickens can fly, right? Also, the males (called roosters) have "spurs" that can be an inch to inch and a half long, and are quite sharp, on their legs.
Domriso 03-14-07, 05:59 PM	That would also be painful. Another fun fact is that chickens can be raised like humans. My aunt did that once. Pee-Wee (the chicken) would drink coffee and eat chips. It also liked chicken wings alot. Scary cannibal chickens:D.
neilthrun 03-14-07, 06:04 PM	Make a Fiendish/Vampiric/Half-golem/Half-fey/Half-dragon/Lolth touched Chicken of Death and you'll have stats to make any PC run in Fear! Aaaah, reminds me of the fiendish phrenic dire rat that I used as a reoccuring encounter. It eventually took lvls in psychic warrior.
Raymond_Luxury_Yacht 03-14-07, 06:10 PM	Chickens should be statted (and yes, they were, but this is backup),so ** fights would work.. Picture this. A chicken, wearing a chicken sized headband of intelligence, carrying a chicken sized magic wand in his claws, while he flies around assisted by a teleport spell and annihilates all the other chickens. Then the low level PC polymorphed into a chicken by the evil sorcerer running the ** fight duels them. Suddenly, it takes on life and death importance. And you can place huge bets on the enemy chicken, so you can pay a mage for true ressurection when the PC loses. Tell me thats not cool Sounds like an episode of Samurai Jack.
Evil DM Mk3 03-14-07, 06:14 PM	Sounds like an episode of Samurai Jack. Well said Throughtwarbeler Mangrove.
El_Machinae 03-14-07, 08:17 PM	I'm pretty sure these uber-beasts are slated for the Epic Level update.
JosephKell 03-14-07, 09:46 PM	Based on Kain Darkwind's chicken Paragon Chicken Tiny Animal Hit Dice: 1/2d8+18 (22 hp) Initiative: +10 Speed: 60 ft., fly 30 ft. (clumsy) AC: 47 (+6 Dex, +2 size, +12 insight, +12 luck, +5 natural), touch 42, flat-footed 41 Base Attack/Grapple: +0/-5 Attack: Peck +30 melee (1d2+23) Space/Reach: 2.5 ft. /0 ft. Special Attacks: Improved Bullrush, Struggle Special Qualities: Cold Resistance 10, Damage Reduction 20/epic, Fast Healing 20, Fire Resistance 10, Low-light vision, Spell Resistance 28 Saves: Fort +16, Ref +13, Will +17 Abilities: Str 16, Dex 22, Con 23, Int 16, Wis 24, Cha 19 Skills: Listen +1, Spot +1 Feats: Improved Bullrush, Improved Initiative, Power Attack, Run* Climate/Terrain: Any Organization: Solitary (but it always seems to be the one you attack) Challenge Rating: 18 (wtf?) Treasure: None Alignment: Always Neutral Evil Struggle: A paragon chicken can deal 1d3+3 damage in a grapple automatically, even on a lost grapple check. Improved Bullrush: A paragon chicken has a +12 modifier for bullrushing others (includes the +4 from Improved Bullrush). I think it's hilarious that is has a CR of 18!
Singer_of_the_Song 03-14-07, 10:31 PM	Sounds like an episode of Samurai Jack. Samurai Jack FTW
Zumarai 03-15-07, 06:20 AM	Well said Throughtwarbeler Mangrove. I thought it was "Throat Wobbler"?
aotrscommander 03-15-07, 07:03 AM	Consdiering Baleful Polymorph, and the fact my players and I have have played Dungeon Keeper, I find the lack of chicken stats - and rabbit and other generally weak creature stats - an oversight. When it occurs, we just use the raven stats (and ignore the flight).
Zumarai 03-15-07, 07:20 AM	Consdiering Baleful Polymorph, and the fact my players and I have have played Dungeon Keeper, I find the lack of chicken stats - and rabbit and other generally weak creature stats - an oversight. Me too, because I've been dying to play an ill tempered awakened hedgehog psion.
Mulkr 03-15-07, 05:19 PM	Make a Fiendish/Vampiric/Half-golem/Half-fey/Half-dragon/Lolth touched Chicken of Death and you'll have stats to make any PC run in Fear! :eek: :mymy: :twitch: :twitch: :twitch: :twitch: :twitch: :gah: :looloo: :OMG! :OMG! :88E: You truly are a master of evil. Have a cthulu cookie.:88E: :cookie: :88E: :cookie:
JosephKell 03-16-07, 05:17 PM	Oh yeah, the Multiheaded Template can add new Hit Dice to a creature (one of the only templates that does that). So you could do a Paragon Multiheaded Chicken of Doom! Each extra head is +2 HD. Awww... Chickens can only be two-headed (Up to Medium-size, max 1 additional head).