Post/Author/DateTime	Post
theblindman 09-13-06, 02:40 PM	Revised 18/02. 100 Useless Magic Items Volume II is 90% complete! Keep the great ideas coming :) Post in this thread, PM me, or email to dmmemoirs@gmail.com. I was asked to post this yesterday. It's something I wrote up a while ago for a high-magic campaign setting like Eberron. I wasn't sure what subforum to put this in, so I just defaulted to here. I hope somebody finds it useful :) 100 Useless Magic Items 1 Mirror of Vanity Anybody who gazes on their own reflection in this ornate mirror gains 1D4 points of charisma. This effect ends when direct visual contact is broken, as with a gaze attack. 2 Xero’s brooch A simple brooch with ivory inlay that allows the user to enact minor cantrips that can only effect articles made from bleached bones. This device has no effect on living bones, but is much-prized by gamblers seeking to turn the dice in their favour. 3 Alysse’s hair dye This ointment is always gray, but when applied to hair it produces dazzling colours to turn the heads of even the most hardened courtiers. Roll 1d8: 1 – green; 2 – blue; 3 – red; 4 – gold; 5 – black; 6 – pink; 7 – silver; 8 – roll twice. 4 Oregar’s imbued skin paint The recipe for these tribal war-paints are a secret closely guarded by shamans. Though not a tattoo, the paste adheres to the skin and lasts for months, and then just disappears. 5 Belt of Charismatic Waltzing While waltzing, gain +1d4 temporary charisma points. This effect ends as soon as the waltz does. 6 Sparklewood A spindly log that when burnt emits sparks of many colours. 7 Balls of Juggling Any character using these bean-stuffed jester’s balls gains 10 ranks in Perform (juggle) until they stop juggling. 8 Ring of Rhyming Forces the wearer to talk in rhyme. If the wearer cannot think of a way to say what they mean in rhyme, then they cannot speak. The ring may be removed freely. 9 Horseless carriage This ostensibly two-horse carriage has all the properties of a regular carriage, including speed, while dispensing with the trouble of having to feed and stable two large beasts. 10 Ring of Pleasant Dreams When asleep, the wearer does not suffer any bad dreams or nightmares. 11 Orb of Communication Similar to a telephone. Just how many of these arcane devices were constructed remains unknown, but the process by which they were created has been lost to time. In order to activate an Orb the user must simply touch the orb and think of a specific person in possession of an Orb. 12 Errand wheel A small wheel with a compartment inside that can be given simple directions or destinations. 13 Acrobatic artistry An animated painting or statue of several small men performing feats of acrobatics. 14 Crystal of Glamour A small gemstone with a light inside. These are usually found in batches of 2d4. 15 Robe of Glamour A majestic robe adorned with crystals of glamour. 16 Alysse’s self-applying nail paints Self explanatory. 17 Bruno’s muscle shirt This shirt moulds to the wearer’s frame, giving the appearance of a smartly-muscled body. The effect is not startling enough to proffer any benefit to charisma or charisma-based skills, but it has helped several aging wizards feel better about themselves. 18 Xero’s Counter-Magic A brooch that generates its own anti-magic field. While this protection does not extend to the wearer, the brooch itself is well-protected. 19 Decal of Blurring Speed When applied to a carriage or the barding of a horse that is in motion, these decals give the visual impression of great speed. This is a minor illusion Will save DC 2 negates. Nobody is actually fooled as to the speed, which indeed does not increase, but this magic is very popular among chariot racers. 20 Circlet of Command This ordinary, copper circlet will obey any commands it is given to the best of its ability. It flies at a speed of 10 ft. with perfect manoeuvrability. It does not have enough mass to act as an effective weapon. 21 Xero’s false map This aged parchment appears to be a normal map of some unknown area. However, each time the map is looked at anew the image has changed. The map variously portrays bedrooms, houses, cities, the country, and even entire worlds, never with even a mote of accuracy. 22 Rod of Volume This thick rod of dark wood is banded at the top with a thin, gold ring. Anybody speaking into the banded ring has the volume of their voice doubled. This does not have any effect on sound-based attacks. 23 Bubble pipe Anyone inhaling from this pipe must make a fortitude save DC 12 or exhale bubbles for 1D4 rounds. Although uncomfortable, this has no negative effects. 24 Xero’s Imitator This spherical ball of a black, rubbery material immediately takes on the form, colour, and texture of any tiny or smaller inanimate object it is set down beside. When the Imitator is no longer within 10 ft. of the object it is mimicking, it reverts to its natural form. 25 Oregar’s Snowball This hand-sized icy sphere never melts, and when tossed into the air it bursts into a light snowfall that effects a 100 ft area. 26 Germaine’s Flock of Butterflies 10D10 neon butterflies that flutter inside an ordinary birdcage. If the door of the cage is opened they immediately dissolve. 27 Xero’s Lie Detector This ostensible lie detector is only 50% accurate, which is to say that it is not accurate at all. 28 Xero’s Eyepatch This normal-seeming eyepatch is see-through on one side, and can be worn without incurring any penalties. 29 Ball of dancing flames An orange ball, slightly larger than a pebble, with a continual flame cast on it. 30 Alysse’s Hair Fairies Small, weightless lights that cling to hair. 31 Alysse’s No-wet Oil This milky oil protects clothes against moderate damp for roughly two weeks. 32 City guide A small figurine that communicates data about a particular area when asked. The figurine makes bardic knowledge checks for its area with a +5 bonus, but knows nothing about other locations. 33 Alysse’s massage slime A harmless ooze kept in a glass jar. When released it travels over the body for a gentle, warm massage. 34 Germaine’s furs A fur robe or cloak that takes on the form and behaviour of its animal when removed. 35 Oregar’s Animal Stick A small, wooden animal runs up and down the length of this staff. The animal cannot be removed from the staff by any force. 36 Swirly A ball, cylinder or other geometric shape that swirls with magical energy inside. 37 Snake necklace A necklace that is an animated, golden snake. 38 Runaway cube A rubbery cube about the size of a mouse that bounces endlessly in seemingly random directions. 39 Portable chair A small chest that folds out into a luxurious chair. 40 Rose of romance When given to a character of the opposite sex, regardless of that character’s interest, the user may make his next suggestion with a +5 bonus on his or her diplomacy check. 41 Germaine’s songbird A small, silver construct in the shape of a bird that sings melodiously to anybody who requests it. 42 Alysse’s Blemish Remover While this ointment confers no benefit on disguise checks, it can conceal unseemly scars and pimples. 43 Portable barbells This 6” iron rod weighs 1 lb ordinarily, but when a command word is spoken it becomes 20 to 100 lbs heavier. 44 Cloth remover A harmless gas that dissolves 20 square feet of cloth in one round. 45 Anycolour Paints This grey oil-paint permanently changes colour on command. This can happen any number of times, but once applied the colour is fixed. 46 Ring of shocking grasp This copper ring delivers a mild electric shock to anybody who clasps the wearer’s hand. 47 Whirling furries These tiny lights come enclosed in a steel cage. When released they whirl and zig-zag furiously, burning out after several minutes. 48 Shreiker A piece of jewellery that screams when put on, and for 1d4 minutes after it is removed. 49 Xero’s Smearing Kerchief This silken handkerchief of fine manufacture smears black ash on anything it is rubbed against. 50 Sparkling candle When lit, this rather stubby candle emits a fountain of multicoloured sparks for three minutes before burning down. 51 Eletia’s Magical Cooler A small chest or icebox, the inside of which is kept magically cool. 52 Return-a-ball A spongy ball that when thrown, returns to its owner with 100% accuracy. 53 Xero’s Alarm A hald-held bell that rings whenever anyone approaches within 10 ft. There is no command word to negate this effect. 54 Eletia’s Sealant A pink paste that hardens when applies. Hardness 5, hp 1. 55 Oregar’s Divining Sticks 6d10 twigs 2 inches in length that when cast on the ground invariably form a meaningless pattern or image. 56 Giggling Goblin A tiny, goblin figurine that points and laughs at anybody who approaches within 10 ft. There is no command word to negate this effect. 57 Xero’s Blinking Coin This gold coin with an eye engraved on both sides is permanently enchanted with a blink spell. 58 Xero’s Displacing Coin This gold coin with an eye engraved on both sides is permanently enchanted with a displacement spell. 59 Tiny shield A tiny object permanently enchanted with its own mage armour. 60 Tanglethread A mass of string and rope permanently enchanted with its own entangle spell. 61 Xero’s Mirrored Coin A coin permanently enchanted with a mirror image spell. 62 Xero’s Floating Coin This coin is buoyant, and floats wherever it is left. 63 Xero’s Repulsive Coin This coin pushes itself away from anybody trying to catch it. Touch AC 23 (Base 0 + 8 Fine +15 dodge). 64 Planar Swing This small, wooden plank fastens itself to the material plane at a command word, and can be pushed like a swing. 65 Snakestring A 9 ft. long rope that behaves as a charmed snake. Usually comes with a musical instrument of some sort. 66 Alysse’s Lipstick Changes colour every ten minutes. 67 Eletia’s Everwarm Goblet This fine, ivory vessel keeps any beverage warm. 68 Eletia’s Evercool Keg This small, oak barrel keeps any beverage cool. 69 Glowing paint Self-explanatory. The effect fades after several months. 70 Electrified coin Delivers a mild, electric shock to anybody grasping it. 71 Disappearing key This plain, copper key can only be found when you’re not looking for it. 72 Illusory Day A pane of glass that when looked through, gives the impression of a beautiful day, whatever the environment on the other side. This is an illusion, will save DC 15. 73 Cloning gem This expensive gem produces an exact duplicate of itself every hour. The duplicates however dissolve after an hour and a half. The duplicates do not duplicate themselves. 74 Unbreakable China Objects fashioned from this gleaming porcelain have a hardness of 20 and 15 hp. 75 Silent Sanctuary A necklace that when worn makes the user temporarily deaf. The necklace may be removed at any time, at which point the user’s hearing returns. 76 Floor shoes Shoes with a repulsive layer on the bottom that makes the wearer move as if on skates. This has no effect on the jump skill but does provide a –2 penalty on balance check, and makes climbing impossible. 77 Warrior Ball A small, metal sphere that rolls into the feet of anybody walking within 50 ft. of it. It deals no damage. 78 Self-paddling oars Self-explanatory. 79 Alysse’s Stupendous Hairdresser A wig that can take on any length, volume, style or colour. 80 Rose-coloured glasses Everything looks better when seen through these glasses. The wearer takes a –1 circumstance penalty on all will saves, but can remove the glasses at any time. 81 Living paints Any image drawn with these paints comes to life in two dimensions. These creatures move along surfaces, and dissolve away with water. 82 Reminding Hats Stores one verbal note and plays it to the wearer when donned. 83 Manyflavour A small vial containing a potion that makes water taste like any good beverage. Each cup of water requires 1 drop, and there are 30 drops in a vial. 84 Eletia’s Warning A small sheet of glass that hovers wherever it is left. Pressing on it with any object leaves behind a black mark that can be erased by wiping across the pane. Used by busy bureaucrats to take quick notes. 85 Portable table A block of wood 2 inches on all sides that can be unfolded into a table 4 ft wide and 10 ft long. 86 Secret Case This ornate jewellery box has a secret compartment on the ethereal plane that can be reached by speaking a command word before opening the box. If the command word is not spoken the box opens to the normal compartment. One box may have more than one secret compartment, each with its own command word. 87 Neverful goblet Any liquids poured into this plain, iron goblet instantly disappears. 88 Xero’s Spilling Cup This goblet of burnished gold has a small wall of force cast across the top, preventing any liquid from being poured in. 89 Xero’s Fountain Goblet Anything poured into this goblet of smooth silver is ejected in a violent geyser 2d4 rounds later. 90 Alysse’s Bouquet An arrangement of flowers that never dies or withers. 91 Oregar’s Gust This feather, plucked from the hide of an owlbear, creates a cooling breeze when waved in the air. 92 Illusory Ring A plain steel band that is enchanted to appear as an expensive ring. Will save DC 12 negates. 93 Alysse’s Girdle This fine, pink girdle appears to make anybody who dons it a tad slimmer. This is a minor illusion, negated by a will save DC 15. 94 Xero’s Tome A book of riddles and nonsense rhymes. Each time the tome is opened it presents fresh material for the reader. 95 Alysse’s Decolletage A fine dress that enlarges the wearer’s bosom. 96 Xero’s Emetic A small vial of liquid that when a droplet is placed into a sample of water, causes vomiting. Fortitude DC 18, primary nauseated for two rounds. Secondary same. 97 Xero’s Enema Like Xero’s Emetic but acts as a laxative. Fortitude DC 18, primary no effect. Secondary nauseated for four rounds. 98 Xero’s Expletive Like Xero’s Emetic but causes swearing. Will DC 18 negates. No numerical penalties. 99 Eletia’s Self-cleaning China Self explanatory, and it even puts itself back in the cupboard. 100 Offensive Orc A tiny orc figurine that makes fun of anybody within 10 ft.
Herecgunina 09-13-06, 02:50 PM	Some of these are quite nice and hardly useless at all. I'll definitely borrow some of them for later games. *yoink*
Toloran 09-13-06, 03:39 PM	Nice, but I have one that you should add to the list :) 101: Powdered Water (Just add water!)
TwiddleStootch 09-13-06, 04:12 PM	those are great! I've got a adventure comming up where my players will find a stash of various nikc-knacks and I am going to add in a few of those. thanks.
Shaggy_Shaggs 09-13-06, 04:48 PM	Heyyyy, these aren't useless. (well, some of 'em). So where's my cup of endless strong black coffee and pouch of everburning tobacco? This store needs more stuff...
lears_fool 09-13-06, 05:36 PM	One of my personal favorites, given to a power gamer of course ;) The Axe of Healing for the first 1d4+1 strikes in a day this +3 shocking axe will instead of doing damage heal the equivalent of the damage that it would have done. The random element led to no end of unexpected hilarity in the group, especially when a party member was injured, the priest was out of cures, and the axe had been used three times ;)
pres_man 09-13-06, 05:55 PM	You need some crafting information for each one.
Illithid_Tentacles 09-13-06, 05:58 PM	I never encountered this one, but I heard about it once. Blue-green bottle: A small piece of blue-green clay shaped like a bottle. When the top of it is touched to something blue, it (the item touched) turns green. When touched to something green, it turns blue.
theblindman 09-13-06, 07:14 PM	I'm glad people are finding this useful. It's always nice to help out the community. :cool: You need some crafting information for each one. You're not really supposed to think about them too much. ;) Blue-green bottle: A small piece of blue-green clay shaped like a bottle. When the top of it is touched to something blue, it (the item touched) turns green. When touched to something green, it turns blue. Hah, that's classic. I may have to throw it into my own adventures somewhere. Thanks :)
Sergikins 09-13-06, 10:26 PM	hey, wheres qualls feather token? just kidding, just kidding :P anyway, i like it. alot. now i imagine a bard with perform waltz getting +1d4 charisma everytime he waltzs. oh right, you might want to add the uranium sword.
Gold Medal Jedi 09-13-06, 10:26 PM	most useful post ever
Solik 09-13-06, 10:54 PM	These are very high quality. Bravo.
Dvaczilla3 09-14-06, 12:59 AM	I kindof like the insulting orc...
Romtos 09-14-06, 03:49 AM	That's list seems a lot of work. I'll save this one for later. :D
Mecha_Pope 09-14-06, 08:40 AM	Perfect for fleshing out a BBEG's lair, especially that overly vain, beutiful sorcerous i have planned! Bravo!
theblindman 09-14-06, 02:00 PM	oh right, you might want to add the uranium sword. You know I never did get around to reading that thread. One of these days... :rolleyes: Thanks for the positive feedback all :)
Quarkus 10-24-06, 12:06 PM	My personal favourite - Return-a-ball :) I lolled my S out at the name :D
Fmu78 10-24-06, 12:17 PM	All I could think of while I read was singing the Ten Days of Christmas using his first ten items.
Sereno 10-24-06, 01:12 PM	Hey, these are just awesome ... perfect for my Eberron campaign. Exactly the sort of thing that weathly people might pay for just for the novelty factor. Especially the "Hair Faeries," Garmaine’s songbird and the others of that ilk. I posted a thread on the Eberron board referencing this thread, too! I think I've got a whole ring of these things: 71 Disappearing key This plain, copper key can only be found when you’re not looking for it. Sometimes, my car keys manage to get themselves attached to that ring, too! :)
theblindman 10-25-06, 12:04 AM	*blink* This popped back up on the first page :) Some random thoughts: if anybody's interested in helping to compile a second volume as a group project, PM me your item and I'll add it to the list. Or you can email me your contribution at notanemu atty hotmail dotty com When I have another hundred put together, I can put that up on the boards too.
pres_man 10-25-06, 12:07 AM	My group came up with an item, not really magic, and not sure if it is all that useless but we found it funny as all heck. Lead Pipe of Persuasion - this ordinary pipe gives a +2 bonus to intimidate rolls when used
Dre2Dee2 10-25-06, 01:38 AM	Wow, some of these are kinda cool. Not power items but some neat rp stuff that could come in handy. Bookmarking. :D
ChaoticGood 11-03-06, 01:04 AM	theblindman, Check out the Everyday Magic Items competitions from UnCon if they are still available... There are some good ones in there, such as the Instant Campfire and the Mutable Rod... or my own Tharashk Tent, if I may be so bold. :)
Raxmei 11-03-06, 01:29 AM	coin camouflage kit A magical coating similar to silversheen, coin camouflage can be used on ordinary copper coins to make them look like silver, gold, or platinum pieces. One kit is sufficient to coat one hundred coins. faint illusion, caster level 3rd, craft wondrous item. silent image, price: 20gp (silver), 200gp (gold), 2000gp (platinum)
Saberus 11-03-06, 11:18 AM	I can think of uses for some items (namely #33 and #44) that would get this thread shot straight to the Mature boards. Let's just hope that Black Mage doesn't get a hold of this stuff. (or should he? :devil: )
Lunar_Shadow 11-03-06, 12:21 PM	A small vial of liquid that when a droplet is placed into a sample of water, causes vomiting. Fortitude DC 18, primary may take only partial actions for 1d4 rounds, secondary same. 97 Xero’s Enema Like Xero’s Emetic but acts as a laxative. 98 Xero’s Expletive Like Xero’s Emetic but causes swearing. Will DC 18 negates. I love these, I need to convince my DM to let me secretly get these in game. :angelhide :evillaugh
woodwalker 11-03-06, 01:05 PM	All I could think of while I read was singing the Ten Days of Christmas using his first ten items. hehehe, yeah.
icnivad 11-03-06, 01:22 PM	hey, wheres qualls feather token? just kidding, just kidding :P anyway, i like it. alot. now i imagine a bard with perform waltz getting +1d4 charisma everytime he waltzs. oh right, you might want to add the uranium sword. hah! The uranium sword? operates like a regular sword, but gives the wielder cancer in 1d4 years? The list was great, I can't wait for one of my players to throw on a cursed ring of rhyming.
Millennium 11-03-06, 01:32 PM	Potion of True Resurrection (corpses can't drink potions)
RobbyPants 11-03-06, 02:04 PM	Potion of True Resurrection (corpses can't drink potions) Nice! :w00t: Scroll of Remove Blindness - range personal
Kaligrad 11-03-06, 02:43 PM	Robe of Useless Items This appears to be an unremarkable robe, but a character who dons it notes that it is adorned with small cloth patches of various shapes. Only the wearer of the robe can see these patches, recognize them for what items they become, and detach them. One patch can be detached each round. Detaching a patch causes it to become an actual item, as indicated below. A newly created robe of useless items always has two each of the following patches: Paring Knife Bullseye Lantern, filled and lit, with the opening welded shut Highly Reflective Spoon Ten one-foot poles Box of Dry Spaghetti Pile of Hemp In addition, the robe has several other patches. Roll 4d4 for the number of other patches and then roll for each patch on the table below to determine its nature. 01-08: Bag of turkey stuffing 09-15: Tiny pine box, suitable for burying pet hamsters, 2 cp value 16-22: Door, pink, must be installed with screws (sold seperately) 23-30: Cool-looking rocks, 10 (3 cp value each) 31-44: Ladder, wooden, with pre-sawed links (24 ft. long) 45-51: Rabbit with a cough (with saddle bags) 52-59: Pothole, open (1 ft. by 1 ft. by 1 ft.) 60-68: Potion of cure serious allergy 69-75: Oar (5 ft. long) 76-83: Minor scroll of one randomly generated dirty limrick 84-90: Yapping toy poodles, pair (treat well, or you'll get bit) 91-100: Portable wooden leg Multiple items of the same kind are permissible. Once removed, a patch cannot be replaced.
Myrddin Wyllt 11-03-06, 03:24 PM	Lovely stuff! ::bookmark::
nightwing 11-03-06, 03:26 PM	A picture frame that automatically sizes itself to fit a painting, and automatically straightens itself when hung on a wall.
The-Half 11-03-06, 08:13 PM	Just wanted 2 give props. Very creative, and actually USEFUL for all of us DM's. Thumbs up!
JerBar 11-03-06, 11:53 PM	Robe of Useless Items This appears to be an unremarkable robe, but a character who dons it notes that it is adorned with small cloth patches of various shapes. Only the wearer of the robe can see these patches, recognize them for what items they become, and detach them. One patch can be detached each round. Detaching a patch causes it to become an actual item, as indicated below. A newly created robe of useless items always has two each of the following patches: Paring Knife Bullseye Lantern, filled and lit, with the opening welded shut Highly Reflective Spoon Ten one-foot poles Box of Dry Spaghetti Pile of Hemp In addition, the robe has several other patches. Roll 4d4 for the number of other patches and then roll for each patch on the table below to determine its nature. I think I've read this before, in a book of magic items.... There were a few items in those books that would fit in this list I think.
Wineless 11-04-06, 10:17 AM	One of my groups favorite items is the +5 shirt of geekiness. It was originally just a joke item I figured they'd leave behind. They ended up fighting over who got it. The shirt features a picture of a human male holding up a flaming longsword, a gold human shaped golem and a short barrel shaped golem are to the right, a woman stands slightly lower than the male on the shirt and is holding a crossbow, and the background consists of a large dark helm and a fortress floating in the sky with mounted knights charging toward it. This special shirt grants the wearer an automatic repulse women effect that works on all females of any race and extends in a radius of ten feet around the wearer. It also grants a +5 on all knowledge(useless) checks. The shirt grants a +4 diplomacy enhancement whenever the character is speaking with someone of high intelligence (15 or higher) and causes anyone with a low intelligence and high strength to want to throw the character in the nearest barrell.
boozerker 11-04-06, 01:47 PM	The Axe of Healing for the first 1d4+1 strikes in a day this +3 shocking axe will instead of doing damage heal the equivalent of the damage that it would have done. The random element led to no end of unexpected hilarity in the group, especially when a party member was injured, the priest was out of cures, and the axe had been used three times ;) What if you Coup de Grace with the axe while it's in healing mode?
Brotter_Lutgehr 11-04-06, 02:04 PM	Any magic item that has the power to change the gender of the wearer
boozerker 11-04-06, 02:06 PM	theblindman, Check out the Everyday Magic Items competitions from UnCon... That might not be its correct name -- not found by google.
theblindman 11-05-06, 06:15 PM	Thanks for the continued warm-fuzzies everyone :cool: A picture frame that automatically sizes itself to fit a painting, and automatically straightens itself when hung on a wall. Good one. I'll add it to the list for Volume II.
Koverchenko 11-06-06, 05:55 AM	Jug of Jazz This rather ordinary looking clay jug comes with a large cork stopping up the mouth. When the cork is removed, a furious and unending Dizzy Gillespie-style jazz solo pours forth from the mouth. As long as the cork is removed the solo will continue. It is a purely free form solo, not following any kind of melody but rather hinting at some mysterious universal order that will not be understood for another 20 eons. Different jugs contain different instruments--trumpets, saxophones, pianos, drums, etc. The jug makes a Perform: Jazz check each time it is opened (it has a modifier of +5, but Greater versions are available with modifiers of +10 and +15 as well), but this result decays by 1 for every minute the jug is left open, continuing down into the negatives if nobody plugs it up. Used as both a party amusement/way to get lingering guests to leave and an instrument of torture, the long term effects of exposure to the infinte chaotic warbling is unknown, but some magical researchers theorize that listening for more than an hour results in insanity. If a jug is broken, it bursts forth with a 10d6 explosion of sonic energy as a massive, dissonant blob of every possible note blasts forth. This blast wave radiates out, losing 1d6 for every 10 feet it travels from the epicenter. This tends to discourage even the most annoyed party guest from smashing the damn thing. It is unknown who created these strange devices, but authorities agree that whoever it was deserves to be smacked really hard in the back of the head.
RobbyPants 11-06-06, 09:40 AM	Jug of Jazz Phylactery of Funk Bottle of Blues Recepticle of R & B Carafe of Country :eek:
theblindman 11-13-06, 07:24 AM	Phylactery of Funk Bottle of Blues Recepticle of R & B Carafe of Country :eek: Haha, genius. I'd like to add them to the list, but the titles are a bit... out-of-place.
MechMage 11-15-06, 05:52 PM	Quote: Originally Posted by Millennium Potion of True Resurrection (corpses can't drink potions) Nice! Scroll of Remove Blindness - range personal Animate, dead. Brail. Sorry to ruin your fun.
NyMpHoMaNiAc_FaNtAsIA 11-15-06, 06:47 PM	They're great! Totally going to use them! My favourite: Alysse’s Lipstick (How cool is that! Would love one IRL!) My contribution for the second list. Here's one I placed as treasure in an adventure. (My players loved it) Durgal's Drinking Pin A Golden Pin in the shape of a ale mug. It allows its wearer to drink alcoholic beverages without ever getting drunk.
theblindman 11-15-06, 07:25 PM	Haha, I love it. Added to Volume II, with full credit. (your name is really hard to type out :p)
cthascott 11-15-06, 07:30 PM	This is by far one of the most useful threads I've ever seen. The Insulting Orc would be a great distractioning device. Durgal's Drinking Pin A Golden Pin in the shape of a ale mug. It allows its wearer to drink alcoholic beverages without ever getting drunk. I could take a Bard and abuse the hell out of this. Thanks. :D
NyMpHoMaNiAc_FaNtAsIA 11-16-06, 12:33 AM	hey, wheres qualls feather token? just kidding, just kidding :P I believe they're next to the 3.0 Ioun Stone (I believe it was the Dull Gray) that just flew around your head. :) Anyway I thought of some more for Volume II: Ribbon of Remembering A brightly colored lace which is tied around the finger forming a ribbon. Upon tying the ribbon the wearer must speak a phrase of no more than 10 words. There is no way, magical or mundane, that the possesor forgets the phrase she spoke until she unties the ribbon. Poe's Heart Gem This magical heart-shaped ruby on a golden chain glows faintly following the rhythm of the wearer's heartbeat. Pillow of Infinite Dreams This is a magical, black, silk pillow embroidered with silvered string. Whoever sleeps on this pillow may, before sleeping, choose what he wants to dream.
LordQuazk 11-16-06, 01:30 AM	I LOVE the Jug of Jazz! ^^ Here's my contribution: Blanket of Wistful Delusions This heroic-looking blanket, when worn, causes the wearer to believe they can fly. When spread out like wings or a cape, the user may pretend to fly. Both the user and anyone observing the user must succeed on a DC 3 Wisdom check, or else the wearer actually begins flying at a speed of 100ft/round. If other people begin observing the flyer, they too must make the Wisdom check. The accidentally successful flier and continuing observers must also repeat the check every 2 rounds. Every 2 rounds of flight, the DC increases by 1. If the DC exceeds 25, the wearer is so screwed. In addition, this item makes it look like the wearer is flying whenever they make a Jump check. Hair Cream of Dramatic Breeze Effects When applied, the wearer's hair appears to be swishing dramatically in the wind. Lasts 1 Hour.
theblindman 11-16-06, 07:52 PM	Ribbon of Remembering A brightly colored lace which is tied around the finger forming a ribbon. Upon tying the ribbon the wearer must speak a phrase of no more than 10 words. There is no way, magical or mundane, that the possesor forgets the phrase she spoke until she unties the ribbon. Poe's Heart Gem This magical heart-shaped ruby on a golden chain glows faintly following the rhythm of the wearer's heartbeat. Pillow of Infinite Dreams This is a magical, black, silk pillow embroidered with silvered string. Whoever sleeps on this pillow may, before sleeping, choose what he wants to dream. Hair Cream of Dramatic Breeze Effects When applied, the wearer's hair appears to be swishing dramatically in the wind. Lasts 1 Hour. Added :)
CryoSilver 11-16-06, 07:55 PM	Durgal's Drinking Pin A Golden Pin in the shape of a ale mug. It allows its wearer to drink alcoholic beverages without ever getting drunk. This could potentially be an incredibly useful item.
SirCaran 11-16-06, 08:09 PM	wouldn't 3 return-a-balls give you a +20 to juggling check?
theblindman 11-22-06, 12:45 AM	:bump: I've updated the first post, partly to correct some embarassing spelling errors, but also to clarify the rules on a few points. Among other things, I've reworded and better-defined how the various emetics and so on work. Volume II is coming along nicely, we've had some great contributions. Keep 'em coming. :thumbsup:
Adrez Nesnsid 12-10-06, 04:50 PM	Robe of Useless Items This appears to be an unremarkable robe, but a character who dons it notes that it is adorned with small cloth patches of various shapes. Only the wearer of the robe can see these patches, recognize them for what items they become, and detach them. One patch can be detached each round. Detaching a patch causes it to become an actual item, as indicated below. A newly created robe of useless items always has two each of the following patches: Paring Knife Bullseye Lantern, filled and lit, with the opening welded shut Highly Reflective Spoon Ten one-foot poles Box of Dry Spaghetti Pile of Hemp Hemp isn't useless! Apparently you can also make rope with it, given enough time...
Lunas_Argent 12-13-06, 02:39 PM	Robe of Useless Items This appears to be an unremarkable robe, but a character who dons it notes that it is adorned with small cloth patches of various shapes. Only the wearer of the robe can see these patches, recognize them for what items they become, and detach them. One patch can be detached each round. Detaching a patch causes it to become an actual item, as indicated below. A newly created robe of useless items always has two each of the following patches: Paring Knife Bullseye Lantern, filled and lit, with the opening welded shut Highly Reflective Spoon Ten one-foot poles Box of Dry Spaghetti Pile of Hemp Is that a pile of hemp fibers, or its merry counterpart, dried hemp herb? The latters not all too useless if you ask me.:D
Lunas_Argent 12-13-06, 02:51 PM	Phylactery of Funk Bottle of Blues Recepticle of R & B Carafe of Country :eek: You forgot the Chest (or box) of Rock Hickory for folk rock (Country Joe and the Fish, Janice Joplin) Oak for '60s/'70s rock Lead for heavy metal Uranium for death metal Gaudy gilded pewter covered in rinestones and false paste gems for disco Or the ultimate constructed of many materials wooden, metal and false gems The box of rocks
Lunas_Argent 12-13-06, 02:55 PM	Animate, dead. Brail. Sorry to ruin your fun. You cant ressurect animated dead I believe. A brail scroll would be cool though.
Maxwell_Silverhammer 12-13-06, 04:57 PM	how do i book mark?
Lunas_Argent 12-13-06, 05:53 PM	how do i book mark? I just add to favorites, ive been using the internet for years and still dont know what bookmarking is, or what the difference is between that and add to favorites
boozerker 12-13-06, 09:02 PM	I just add to favorites, ive been using the internet for years and still dont know what bookmarking is, or what the difference is between that and add to favorites Same thing. But why not subscribe instead? At top of page, under "Thread tools" link, click to subscribe to a thread. Check user preferences to access all your subscribed threads, and unsuscribe from any later on. It's good because you can access your "subscribed" lists from any computer.
Lunas_Argent 12-14-06, 12:25 PM	I LOVE the Jug of Jazz! ^^ Here's my contribution: Blanket of Wistful Delusions This heroic-looking blanket, when worn, causes the wearer to believe they can fly. When spread out like wings or a cape, the user may pretend to fly. Both the user and anyone observing the user must succeed on a DC 3 Wisdom check, or else the wearer actually begins flying at a speed of 100ft/round. If other people begin observing the flyer, they too must make the Wisdom check. The accidentally successful flier and continuing observers must also repeat the check every 2 rounds. Every 2 rounds of flight, the DC increases by 1. If the DC exceeds 25, the wearer is so screwed. In addition, this item makes it look like the wearer is flying whenever they make a Jump check. So you have to pass a wisdom check to keep from flying? If youve ever read Hitchikers Guide to the Galaxy, (I dont believe theres one in these forums who hasnt) its kinda similar, youd have to fail the wisdom check to fly.
Lunas_Argent 12-14-06, 12:28 PM	wouldn't 3 return-a-balls give you a +20 to juggling check? There you go, juggling balls (clubs, daggers, chainsaws) of returning.
Lunas_Argent 12-14-06, 12:31 PM	But why not subscribe instead? If you leave a post in a thread, it subscribes you to it automaticaly I believe.
Joni-san 12-14-06, 12:37 PM	Not automatically, you have to select the option from a drop down menu in a old-school post or use the "thread tools" menu.
Undrhil 01-18-07, 02:34 AM	Pillow of Infinite Dreams This is a magical, black, silk pillow embroidered with silvered string. Whoever sleeps on this pillow may, before sleeping, choose what he wants to dream. I would count this as a moderately powerful item. If I can choose whatever I want to dream about, I could choose to dream about the current location of the BBEG (and hope it's not on the toilet) or any number of other things. Blanket of Wistful Delusions This heroic-looking blanket, when worn, causes the wearer to believe they can fly. When spread out like wings or a cape, the user may pretend to fly. Both the user and anyone observing the user must succeed on a DC 3 Wisdom check, or else the wearer actually begins flying at a speed of 100ft/round. If other people begin observing the flyer, they too must make the Wisdom check. The accidentally successful flier and continuing observers must also repeat the check every 2 rounds. Every 2 rounds of flight, the DC increases by 1. If the DC exceeds 25, the wearer is so screwed. In addition, this item makes it look like the wearer is flying whenever they make a Jump check. Heh ... I think this is hilarious. What's even more funny, though, is that the person *watching* could fail his Will save and the person wearing the blanket would start flying. My next question is: What happens if the DC check gets above 25? Except for the fact that the person is more likely to start flying, I can't figure out anything bad about it. Oh! Unless they are indoors ... 100ft/round could be a Bad Thing. :-D And now for my contribution: Box of Freezing This box is the size of a standard lockbox (about 1'x1'x2') but doesn't have a locking mechanism. If you place something inside the box and close the lid, that item has it's temperature reduced to -4 degrees Fahrenheit. Basically, it quick-freezes things. The item placed within has to be organic (in other words: food .. or a shrunken person :evillaugh:) Anything non-organic placed within is not affected, even if placed inside with something organic. Variant - Box of Cooling Same as box of freezing, except the item temperature is reduced to 41 degrees Fehrenheit. Varient - Box of Heating Same as box of freezing, except the item temperature is increased (or decreased, as the case may be) to the proper temperature for cooking the item. If the item is kept in the box of heating for 2 minutes, it is properly cooked when removed, even if the actual cooking time should have been less than 2 minutes. Note: This can be used to correct a burnt recipe, if the food can be put into the box. Club of Intelligence This small wooden club is weighted in such a way as to make it worthless for use in combat. However, if someone is hit over the head with this club, as a standard attack (plus bonuses for STR, etc.) they receive +1 INT as damage for 2d4 rounds. Alternatively, the wielder can hit himself over the head as a standard attack and the bonus INT will last for 2d4 days. The only caveat is that the "attack" must be done in the presense of at least two other people. Bracers of Whispering When these bracers are equipped, they project a 10' radius area of low volume (85%). Librarians are starting to catch on and wear these while tending to the library. They only affect voices and noises coming from people and animals. Opaque Quartz Marble This marble is one of a set of three. When all three marbles are together, they produce a very faint but distinct background noise. It is very relaxing to hear. The marbles by themselves do nothing. However, they do emit a very faint aura of magic, so Detect Magic on any of the marbles will reveal that it is one of a set. This could prove to be an interesting plot hook as the PCs try to find the rest of the set to see what they do. :) Clear Quartz Marble Same as Opaque Quartz Marble. Black Quartz Marble Same as Opaque Quartz Marble.
JerBar 01-18-07, 02:50 AM	Club of Intelligence This small wooden club is weighted in such a way as to make it worthless for use in combat. However, if someone is hit over the head with this club, as a standard attack (plus bonuses for STR, etc.) they receive +1 INT as damage for 2d4 rounds. Alternatively, the wielder can hit himself over the head as a standard attack and the bonus INT will last for 2d4 days. The only caveat is that the "attack" must be done in the presense of at least two other people. Damn, I'd throw one of thoes in. But I would only make it last 2d4 rounds because I know my players would abuse it to no end. I'd also make it a +2 weapon so they would use it on creatures hoping they can kill it off before it starts outsmarting them. "Me Gronk, smash you." Thunk "Me Gronk, first flank, then smash you." Thunk "I'm Gronk, and I will dodge the nasty club before I attempt to smash you" Thunk "Maybe I should stop telling you what I'm going to do before I do it." Thunk "I really wish you would stop hitting me with that club, it hurts." Thunk "That must be a magic club because it hurts more then a normal club." Thunk "I've been hit with that club quite a few times now, and I should probably re-think my fighting stratagy"
Mock26 01-18-07, 02:56 AM	Ah, I love LINDA items. In case you're wondering, LINDA stands for Looks Interesting Never Does Anything. My all time favorite was the 50' long wooden plank of wood that was in a dungeon. It was so long that there was no way to get it out by simply carrying it. The group ended up having to tie a bag of holding on one end and a portable hole on the other to reduce the effective length down to 30'. They lugged this piece of wood with them through the entire dungeon because the alteration aura that it had them really intrigued. When they finally identified it they were quite ****** off at me. The magic enchantment on the board reduced it's weight by 2%!
Undrhil 01-18-07, 02:56 AM	Well, the part about it being weighted to be not effective in combat is in there to let you know that it doesn't deal normal damage. Actually, it doesn't deal damage at all. It just increases the INT of the target by 1 for 2d4 rounds *or* by 1 for 2d4 days if the wielder and target are the same. I guess I could make that be a little less. Maybe it only applies up to +4 if used on self?
JerBar 01-19-07, 02:21 PM	+4 to int is WAY too much to hand out without side effects when you are talking days. It would be like a circlet of intillect +4 for the whole party, plus anyone who crossed their path. Mountains of room for exploit for every party member. It should do damage, maybe even double damage if the target is self.
Undrhil 01-19-07, 05:52 PM	For your consideration, I present the new and improved Club of Intelligence This small wooden club is weighted in such a way as to make it worthless for use in combat However, if someone is hit over the head with this club, as a standard attack (plus bonuses for STR, etc.) they receive +1 INT non-cumulative as damage for 1d8 rounds. Alternatively, the wielder may attempt to hit himself over the head at a -4 penalty to Attack in order to gain 1d4 INT as damage for 1d8 hours. If used in this way, the Club will cease to give bonus INT to anyone until the 1d8 hours expires. I think this is a better balance of the Club of Intelligence and I might actually stat this out for an item in my campaign. :)
gamerlamer666 01-19-07, 06:22 PM	All I could think of while I read was singing the Ten Days of Christmas using his first ten items. I thought it was 12 days pf christmas?
Adrian_Crane 01-20-07, 01:02 AM	I think "Offensive Orc" wins my vote for personal favorite. :D
boozerker 01-20-07, 08:13 AM	I thought it was 12 days pf christmas? 12 days of "holidays" ;)
Sammael93 01-20-07, 09:07 AM	I can find a useful use for probably every item on this list. Maybe not a great use, but still a useful one. Such as the items that ring, or make fun of, at anything that approaches within 10 ft. = alert to invisible creatures or NPCs. Anyway, I'm definately including a lot of these in my next campaign.
Sajek 01-20-07, 05:19 PM	Parrot of Utter Annoyance: A life-sized stone parrot. It is permanently enchanted with a detect thoughts and will repeat over and over again any phrases or words that annoy you, as well as any embarassing secrets you may have. The Glasses of Best Intentions: A pair of highly fashionable spectacles. They turn completely opaque if the wearer is near something dangerous or frightening, effectively blinding him but simultaneously not allowing him to see the danger, therefore ensuring he will not be afraid of it. Sculptor's friend: This lump of clay fits comfortably in the palm. It is very easy to mold or sculpt and will never harden. (variation) Coin of Blinking: A shiny gold coin with an eye engraved on one side. The eye will blink peridiodicaly and will stare at people who it sees. The pupil expands and contracts according to darkness and light. The Inconvenient Door: A plain wooden door. It closes itself if you try to pass through it when it is open.
Sammael93 01-20-07, 07:28 PM	Fly on a String: Literally. This is an enchanted common housefly on a ten inch length of string. It can perform small tricks (such as flying loops) through use of telepathy with you, but whoever holds it takes a -2 penalty on Concentration checks, whether it is stationary or flying. You cannot command it to do anything besides tricks, fly, or remain stationary. If you let go of the string, it immiediately flies away. If you try to stow it, it dies within one minute. Mirror of Insight: This enchanted, ornately carved hand-mirror lets the user see themselves as they truly wish to look. This has no use other than that of the pleasure of vain people. Necklace and Ring of Negation: These white (ring) and black (necklace) pieces of enchanted jewelry are made of a "semi-pliable" metal, and only take effect if worn to together. The ring provides a constant +5 bonus to Str, Cha, Dex, Con, Int, and Wis. The necklace provides a constant -5 penalty to Str, Cha, Dex, Con, Int, and Wis. If only one item is worn without the other, it has no effect. Invisible Gloves: These pale brown, leather gloves, when worn, become invisible to all but those who can see through invisibilty naturally or magically. Your hands are still visible through the gloves. The gloves are soft enough not to hamper movement. They conform to your hands no matter what size they are, and are form fitting enough that nothing can be concealed within. Bag of Uselessness: This sack, originally appearing the size of a normal burlap sack, is make of stitched rawhide. It allows hands and other limbs to enter freely, but if any object tries to be put into it, the bag shrinks to a size just small enough so as not allow that item in. Ripping the sides of the bag open to allow more entrance room makes the bag shrink every round to half its size from the round before for as many rounds as it takes to disappear. Bag of Useless Items: This small hand bag is made of soft leather with a drawstring top. If felt, it feels as though nothing is in it, and the weight is negligible. If someone reaches into it, they feel a small item, ranging from anything like a spoon to a ball. Only one item can be withdrawn at a time (if another item is removed while one is in existence from the same bag, the first item disappears). The item withdrawn, although seemingly normal (only a very faint glow can be seen with a detect magic spell, and requires a DC 15 Spot check to see, but the bag emits a magical aura as normal), totally "defies" its possible purpose. For example, a spoon may curve away from food or liquid, and a ball may simply fall to the floor and not bounce. If turned inside-out, a Bag of Useless Items magical property is destroyed, although the bag remains functional as a simple bag. (DM decides what items may be withdrawn beforehand and what their flaws are).
Rickenbacker 01-20-07, 07:31 PM	Book Of Infinite Boredom This plain, untitlted tome contains 7000.....blank pages. Upon opening it, the reader is compelled to sit & stare at the pages for 1 hour unless a DC20 Will save is made.
gamerlamer666 01-20-07, 09:54 PM	12 days of "holidays" ;) Holidays?! Wow, ya know what, I am not that kinda person that gives a :censored: about others belives( I care bout my own) so therefore its still christmas( not that politicaly correct bull:censored: the goverment trys to force us to belive)
boozerker 01-21-07, 01:01 PM	Holidays?! Wow, ya know what, I am not that kinda person that gives a :censored: about others belives( I care bout my own) so therefore its still christmas( not that politicaly correct bull:censored: the goverment trys to force us to belive) The winky smile (like this ;)) 'tis a joke. I use Merry Christmas, but hell if I'll ever believe the AM radio loudmouths (and certain other media pretenders) who claim there's a war against it. So Merry (belated) Christmas everyone :tiphat:
boozerker 01-21-07, 01:09 PM	And yes, it's 12 days of Christmas.
NyMpHoMaNiAc_FaNtAsIA 01-21-07, 01:54 PM	I would count this as a moderately powerful item. If I can choose whatever I want to dream about, I could choose to dream about the current location of the BBEG (and hope it's not on the toilet) or any number of other things. Well sure, you can dream about anything you want. But think about it, dreams are not divinations, they are created by your own memories and imagination. So your mind may conjure the location of the BBEG as a fantastic castle located amid a dark valley. But how much of this is true? What I'm trying to say is that dreams do not impart new knowledge or insight, but dwell on your own. I guess it needs a write-up with a few clarifications...
gamerlamer666 01-21-07, 02:37 PM	The winky smile (like this ;)) 'tis a joke. I use Merry Christmas, but hell if I'll ever believe the AM radio loudmouths (and certain other media pretenders) who claim there's a war against it. So Merry (belated) Christmas everyone :tiphat: Ahh ok sorry for not understanding your complicated smilie based languges.
MechMage 01-21-07, 04:29 PM	Pillow of Infinite Dreams- It says in the planer handbook that dreams fade once you wake up, so even if they could scry, it'd be worthless unless you attacked them without waking up. Club of Int- Even with those restictions, its far from useless Boxes of Tempitures- What adventurer doesn't want a microwave, freezer, or instant drink cooler? Any restrant would pay big bucks for this stuff. A smith could use them to forge weopons, iron "cooks" at a high enough tempature to melt. Box of cooling+reduce person=instant cure for hypodermia and heat stroke. Necklace and Ring of Negation- Bonuses and penelties of the same type don't stack, so you can use this to null a curse. Parrot of Utter Annoyance- Exelant distraction. Invisible Gloves- You can conseal a weopon in it. There was an effect in complete scoundrel that made a weopon invisible, but I can't find it now. The DC on finding that would be astronomical. Bag of Uselessness- A reliable contracting object would be insane in some traps. Bag of Useless Items- More like bag of infinant trinkets to be sold to stupied NPCs. Let's see some useless magic items.
Sammael93 01-21-07, 05:44 PM	For the Invisible Gloves, as I stated, they are so form-fitting that nothing can be slipped between them and the wearer's hand. Perhaps i was not clear enough on this. Bag of Uselessness-Only contracts for objects. Would have no practical use in a trap (unless you have a genius DM), because limbs could be "put" in it without it contracting. Bag of Useless Items-As stated, only one item can exist from each bag at a single time. And I'm sorry, i forgot to put this in the description: "If any of the items withdrawn from a Bag of Useless Items is given to anyone other than the person who withdrew, it immediately fades away." Sorry, i was really tired when I wrote that description. Neckalce and Ring of Negation- Add "These bonuses and penalties do stack." to the description. Also tired when i wrote this.
GalaGalaxia 01-21-07, 06:30 PM	Lousywork [insert melee weapon] This [insert melee weapon] is so poorly made that you take -1 penalty to your attack rolls and deal 2 less points of damage (minimum 0). Ring of Instant Gratification While wearing this ring, after taking any action, you immediately become satisfied with the outcome of the action (whether good or bad). This satisfaction grants no bonuses and results in no penalties. You will, however, feel better about yourself. Tome of Random Knowledge This thick book contains random knowledge about seemingly everyday topics. The intricate detail surrounding each topic is, however, far from "everyday". If anyone reads this book, which takes 48 hours over a minimum of six days, he gains an inherent bonus of +1 to his untrained knowledge checks. Reading this book more than once does not provide additional benefits. Goggles of Blindness These solid black goggles cover both eyes and prevent the wearer from seeing his surroundings. While wearing the goggles, the character is treated as if blind. After removing the goggles, the character's eyesight returns to normal. Knife of Cutting This slender knife is exceedingly sharp, providing a +2 circumstance bonus on any Craft (Food) or Profession (Chef) checks. Gloves of Thievery Wearing these gloves while stealing prevents the leaving of finger prints. Necklace of Choking This necklace is very tight. Donning the necklace will require a DC5 Fortitude Save. Failure means the wearer will begin suffocating. While wearing the necklace, each successive hour a new save must be performed, each time increasing the DC by 1. Removing the necklace ends any suffocation effect.
Sammael93 01-21-07, 07:48 PM	The Lousywork weapon is more of an inconvenience. It is still useful. The Tome of Random Knowledge is definately not useless. It provides a good bonus... Googles of Blindness, closer, but could be used as "immunity" to a powerful gaze attack. Knife of Cutting gives a +2 bonus on two different checks... How is that useless? Gloves of Theivery equals a thieve's best friend! Useful=definately (and helpful). Neckalce of Choking is more of a cursed item than a useless one. and I'm nearly positive that suffocation occurs in less that an hour, or successive hours...
GalaGalaxia 01-21-07, 08:29 PM	The Lousywork weapon is more of an inconvenience. It is still useful. The Tome of Random Knowledge is definately not useless. It provides a good bonus... Googles of Blindness, closer, but could be used as "immunity" to a powerful gaze attack. Knife of Cutting gives a +2 bonus on two different checks... How is that useless? Gloves of Theivery equals a thieve's best friend! Useful=definately (and helpful). Neckalce of Choking is more of a cursed item than a useless one. and I'm nearly positive that suffocation occurs in less that an hour, or successive hours... Make it a Lousywork Dagger, and you're almost always up for 0 points of damage :) Tome of Random Knowledge is useless, as untrained knowledge checks only have a DC of 10 (max), and they never reveal anything useful. Woohoo, I'm just more likely to know stuff that everyone else also knows. Googles of Blindness ... Hmm, at least a move action to don and remove. How about if I just close my eyes instead. Knife of Cutting ... True, that can almost be too useful, assuming there's a DM who makes people use Craft (Food) checks before eating. Gloves of Theivery ... leave no prints, when there's no one around with technology to use those prints anyway :P
stargate525 01-21-07, 08:32 PM	Box of Sammael A plain, ordinary box made of wood. Nothing can be put in it, nothing can be put on it, it cannot be burned for firewood, nor can someone stand on it. It cannot be used as a weapon, nor used to block a door. It cannot be sold for any value, and is in every other respect completely useless. Better? ;)
Durin413 01-21-07, 08:57 PM	Wizards would kill babies for that 7k page book, especially later on when they will always make the will save except on a 1.
LordQuazk 01-21-07, 10:44 PM	On the Blanket of Wistful Delusions Heh ... I think this is hilarious. What's even more funny, though, is that the person *watching* could fail his Will save and the person wearing the blanket would start flying. My next question is: What happens if the DC check gets above 25? Except for the fact that the person is more likely to start flying, I can't figure out anything bad about it. Oh! Unless they are indoors ... 100ft/round could be a Bad Thing. :-D Nah, the wearer and all observers need to fail the Wis. Check in order to fly, and the check is only forced when the wearer holds the blanket out like wings. Although, one that randomly activates whenever someone looks at it would be pretty sweet too. XD When the DC gets above 25... what are the chances of someone passing a DC 25+ Wisdom check? How many people have 20+ Wisdom? Granted, you will probably fly past all of them, but you'll eventually starve or smash into something, because you can't willingly stop. So you have to pass a wisdom check to keep from flying? If youve ever read Hitchikers Guide to the Galaxy, (I dont believe theres one in these forums who hasnt) its kinda similar, youd have to fail the wisdom check to fly. Yep, passing a check to keep from flying is the same as failing a check in order to fly. :) Yeah, I love HGttG's explanation of how flying works. XD -- Oh, I guess I should have clarified something. You're flying at a speed of 100, with poor maneuverability. Unless you're on open plains, you might not see your party for a looong time.
ShinoAburame 01-22-07, 01:01 AM	Sweet, I'm going to add all of these into my games. Instead of vorpal swords they get mirrors of vanity hahahaha. XD I love toturing my players. I'm so much like DeeDee as GM. And everyone is my Dexter.
GalaGalaxia 01-22-07, 02:06 AM	+5 Bastard Sword of Friendliness Because this sword was forged while shifting back and forth between the ethereal plane and the plane of shadow, it has been imbued with some unique qualities. While attacking with this weapon, there is a 50% mischance due to the etherealness of the sword. There is also a 50% mischance due to shadow. The mischances stack.
GalaGalaxia 01-22-07, 02:31 AM	Parchment of Idiocy This single sheet of paper contains simple instructions which the reader feel an urging need to follow (Will DC 5 negates). Generally, both sides of the paper are inscribed with the words "Turn me over."
Undrhil 01-22-07, 03:20 AM	Scrying Glasses These appear to be a normal pair of spectacles. When worn, they always show what the viewer feels will be the worst possible outcome of whatever is currently viewed. For example, if a wizard dons these and views his spellbook (and has a fear of his spellbook being stolen), he will see his spellbook sitting on a shelf amonst many other spellbooks, in some fence's storehouse. If a thief has a fear of being caught and views herself in a mirror, she will will see herself in jail or with a noose around her neck. Empty Glass No matter how much liquid is poured into this glass, it is always empty. It is *not* indestructable. Invisibility Cloak of Vanity Viewing This cloak will turn invisible whatever worn clothing it is placed over, without regard to layers. This does not affect the person wearing the clothing. Variant: Scrying Glass These appear to be a standard pair of spectacles. When worn, they always show an apocalyptic future where there is much blood-shed and many volcanoes erupting everywhere. (Will DC 10 or lose all hope and start crying for 2d6 minutes.)
GalaGalaxia 01-22-07, 04:46 AM	Headband of Powerful Insight This headband grants its wearer a +10 competence bonus on all Knowledge (DM) checks. Staff of Sheep Herding This long wooden staff is slightly curved at the top. It grants its owner a +2 circumstance bonus whenever attempting to pass for a shepherd in a field.
GalaGalaxia 01-22-07, 10:28 AM	Footband of Powerful Walking This band straps around your ankle. When you are walking, each step you take will give that familiar "stomping" sound. Running will create an illusion of a minor earthquake (Will DC 2 negates). This item is greatly coveted by armies who want to sound larger than they are before coming into the enemy's view. Bard's Spellbook This spellbook allows bards to write beautiful songs and poetry without fear of spelling mistakes. Only one language is contained in each spellbook. You must be able to speak the language contained in the spellbook in order to be able to make use of it.
MechMage 01-22-07, 04:26 PM	Invisible Gloves- Stick some invisible look picks into the seem, lets see the guards find them! Bag of Uselessness- Trip wire pulls a marble into the bag, it closes, pulling harder than the trip wire did. Bag of Useless Items- Use the items as improvised other item, such as a spoon used as a climbing spike. Neckalce and Ring of Negation- Wear a different neckless to occupie the body slot, and the neckalce of negation is still worn. Lousywork [insert melee weapon]- Look, this dagger is sharp, yet I can slit my throat without dieing! Win bets you never though possible. Goggles of Blindness- Rob a medusa while invisible. Knife of Cutting- This is in no way useless. Gloves of Theivery- fools Dust of Detection Parchment of Idiocy- reads "Give me a gold piece" Shove in NPC's face repeatitvely. +5 Bastard Sword of Friendliness- Outer planes aren't coexistant with the material plane, so the curse is nule. Empty Glass- Easily drain the ocean. This is a major artifact. Box of Sammael- Get thirty and soveren glue them open to a wall. The wall is now indistructable, because in order to hit it, a weopon would have to enter the box. Staff of Sheep Herding- Bonus on disguise checks=not useless Headband of Powerful Insight- A bonus on meta gaming, not only imposible to craft, but of artifact power. Footband of Powerful Walking- Twenty guys with they could easily force all the commoners out of a village, and loot it. I asked for useless items.
Mock26 01-22-07, 05:43 PM	Rings of Connection. This is a matched set of magical rings that are permanently linked together. If you are wearing one ring you are instantly made aware of the fact that there is a second ring somewhere in the world. The ring gives no clues such as direction, distance, etc. You are only aware that another ring exists. If you are wearing both rings at the same time, though, there is an additional power to the rings. This additional power is the ability to magically locate the other ring.
Raymond_Luxury_Yacht 01-22-07, 06:00 PM	+5 Bastard Sword of Friendliness- Outer planes aren't coexistant with the material plane, so the curse is nule. The Ethereal Plane and the Plane of Shadow are not Outer Planes.
GalaGalaxia 01-22-07, 06:03 PM	I asked for useless items. Well, there goes the original list out the window as well. Most items are useful in one way or another, depending on your perspective. Besides, you can't soverign glue multiple Box of Sammael together, as nothing can be put on them.
stargate525 01-22-07, 06:41 PM	Box of Sammael- Get thirty and soveren glue them open to a wall. The wall is now indistructable, because in order to hit it, a weopon would have to enter the box. Besides, you can't soverign glue multiple Box of Sammael together, as nothing can be put on them. And considering I never said the box was hollow, openable, or had a lid. In fact, 'box' only means it has at least six sides.
Sammael93 01-22-07, 06:51 PM	Invisile Gloves-These gloves are made of one continuous piece of leather. No stitching is present. Bag of Uselessness- A marble COULD NOT be pulled into it! It always shrinks just enough so that the object cannot be put into it. Nothing object-wise can occupy it's inside. Necklace and Ring of Negation- Add this to the description: "The Necklace or ring do not have to occupy their body slots to take effect. Thet do not count against your total wearable jewelry slots." Bag of Useless Items- add this to the description: "If the item is used for anything besides its "intended" purpose, it either disappears, or is flawed for whatever use it trying to be used for (DM's choice)."
Altar_Boy 01-22-07, 07:05 PM	Phylactery of Re-Examination Whenever the wearer performs an act against its alignment type, the Phylactery telepathically tells them about it AFTER it happens. It then berates them for 6 rounds, and tells them to call their mother.
MechMage 01-22-07, 07:52 PM	The Ethereal Plane and the Plane of Shadow are not Outer Planes. Exactly, so if you go to the nine hells, there is no miss chance. And considering I never said the box was hollow, openable, or had a lid. In fact, 'box' only means it has at least six sides. Sorry for the miss understanding. So you're saying it is accually a block? Invisile Gloves-These gloves are made of one continuous piece of leather. No stitching is present. Bag of Uselessness- A marble COULD NOT be pulled into it! It always shrinks just enough so that the object cannot be put into it. Nothing object-wise can occupy it's inside. Necklace and Ring of Negation- Add this to the description: "The Necklace or ring do not have to occupy their body slots to take effect. Thet do not count against your total wearable jewelry slots." Bag of Useless Items- add this to the description: "If the item is used for anything besides its "intended" purpose, it either disappears, or is flawed for whatever use it trying to be used for (DM's choice)." Gloves- leather isn't so tough you can't slit it, and stick in some pics. Or you could put them inside the gloves. Bag- Exactly, the marble is pulled towards it, so it contracts, pulling a rope tied to it. Necklace&Ring- Can't I wear one necklace and three rings? Other Bag- Tie a shiny object to a trip wire. Phylactery- Helps a stupied player atone his paladan. A very stupid player. I know there were useless items, I want items that will be hard to prove useful.
Undrhil 01-22-07, 08:38 PM	Small disc About the size of a dime. When a command word is spoken, it will shrink to infinitesimal size permanantly. If examined before shrinking, it appears to tell the tale of some mighty king who lived long ago. Pointed Wizard's Hat When this hat is worn, it starts talking telepathically to the wearer about the dandruff in their hair. If taken off and then put back on later (who would do this?), the hat will complain telepathically about being discarded (for 2d10 minutes) and *then* start talking about the wearer's dandruff again.
Mock26 01-22-07, 08:43 PM	A feather that weighs absolutely nothing.
Sammael93 01-22-07, 08:58 PM	Invisible Gloves: If you cut open the leather and then stitched with sumthing in them, when you put them back on, the picks would be dirven through your skin and into your hand! Necklace and Ring-These dont count against your body slots.
GalaGalaxia 01-22-07, 09:08 PM	Robe of Thinking Wearing this robe will allow you to think just as well as if you were not wearing it. In fact, putting the robe on or taking the robe off while thinking will not disturbe your thoughts any more than any other similar action might. Lime of Squeezing Upon command, this lime will squeeze the juice out of itself. However, the self squeezed juice will disappear as soon as it has been squeezed.
stargate525 01-22-07, 09:49 PM	Sorry for the miss understanding. So you're saying it is accually a block? No, I'm saying its a box. Considering that it is in every way useless, the point is moot.
Raymond_Luxury_Yacht 01-22-07, 11:17 PM	Exactly, so if you go to the nine hells, there is no miss chance. Still has a miss chance. 3.x made the Plane of Shadow and the Ethereal Plane coterminous with the Outer Planes and well as the Inner Planes. Edit: Plus, as the blade only exists in those planes, if they weren't coterminous with the Outer Planes, you'd only have a hilt.
GalaGalaxia 01-23-07, 12:59 AM	... and half a blade on the Plane of Shadow, and another half a blade on the Ethereal Plane.
boozerker 01-23-07, 09:16 AM	I asked for useless items. The OP's list isn't useless. Some of these are quite nice and hardly useless at all. I'll definitely borrow some of them for later games. *yoink* And You're not really supposed to think about them too much. ;) Besides, the newer entries are turning into somewhat of a "counters its own effect" kind of items. Don't pay attention to the title much. Create little amazing trinkets that have no useful game effects but still adds lots of charm in-game.
boozerker 01-23-07, 09:18 AM	For the Knife of Cutting, add that it loses sharpness when pressed against creatures, yet becomes sharp again if placed against food. That way its real purpose is to prevent cutting yourself while chopping veggies and foodstuffs.
GalaGalaxia 01-23-07, 02:16 PM	Trinket of Thumb Twiddling This little trinket is perfect for anyone who wants to be just a little bit lazy, but really does not have the time. Two hands are mounted side by side. Upon command, the hands will clasp and begin twiddling the thumbs. A separate command word causes the twiddling to stop. The trinket is currently only available with human, elven, or dwarven hands. Other races are being considered for production.
GalaGalaxia 01-23-07, 03:14 PM	Parchment of Idiocy- reads "Give me a gold piece" Shove in NPC's face repeatitvely. Can we at least try to read the item descriptions before commenting on them? Or, was this your own version of a similar item? Lousywork [insert melee weapon]- Look, this dagger is sharp, yet I can slit my throat without dieing! Win bets you never though possible. Goggles of Blindness- Rob a medusa while invisible. Who said anything about the dagger being sharp? It is so worthless that you can hardly cut with it. And, don't forget that robbing while blind is somewhat ... difficult.
stargate525 01-23-07, 03:53 PM	Cloth of Cleaning (might be something similar, I don't remember.) This cloth will remove hard to remove stains, such as blood, oil, ketchup, mustard, demonic hellfire residue, and sweat without ever becoming soiled itself. It also removes it form difficult to clean surfaces such as thick carpet or dirt. Note that an attempt to clean a dirt floor will result in a significant amount of dirt loss, as the cloth cannot distinguish the floor from the stain.
GalaGalaxia 01-23-07, 04:04 PM	Cloth of Clothing This large piece of cloth will resize itself to fit any humanoid creature who wraps it around himself. Once resized, the cloth will take on the appearance of an ordinary robe until removed, at which point it will become a seemingly regular piece of cloth again.
GalaGalaxia 01-23-07, 04:13 PM	Bag of Garbage Disposal This bag is actually a small construct which can be "fed" general household garbage. It doesn't matter if you feed it potato peels or old diapers -- it will happily munch and dissolve any such normal household garbage. The construct is lacking limbs, and can therefore not move on its own. The mouth can be opened by uttering a command word. The construct will never close its mouth on living things, and is therefore safe to use even in a home with a lot of children. Beware of their toys, however.
MechMage 01-23-07, 04:18 PM	Small disc About the size of a dime. When a command word is spoken, it will shrink to infinitesimal size permanantly. If examined before shrinking, it appears to tell the tale of some mighty king who lived long ago. Pointed Wizard's Hat When this hat is worn, it starts talking telepathically to the wearer about the dandruff in their hair. If taken off and then put back on later (who would do this?), the hat will complain telepathically about being discarded (for 2d10 minutes) and *then* start talking about the wearer's dandruff again. Disc- Shink as in volume or shirnk as in mass? Hat- Soverin glue to BBEG's head. It doesn't interupt the tought proses, but after a week will motivate them to pull. off there skin to stop the noise. Or at the least get them ****** at you. Good if you're the tank. A feather that weighs absolutely nothing Use 200 to a buancy to a raft, so it can hold more. Invisible Gloves: If you cut open the leather and then stitched with sumthing in them, when you put them back on, the picks would be dirven through your skin and into your hand! Necklace and Ring-These dont count against your body slots. Gloves- Stick the picks between the gloves and your hand then. I won't try to explain what I was saying before. Necklace&Ring- Exactly. Wear many rings, and one necklace to activate them. No, I'm saying its a box. Considering that it is in every way useless, the point is moot. Throw it into the middle of the room, so the NPCs stare at it, and try to figure out what it does while you sneak around. Still has a miss chance. 3.x made the Plane of Shadow and the Ethereal Plane coterminous with the Outer Planes and well as the Inner Planes. Edit: Plus, as the blade only exists in those planes, if they weren't coterminous with the Outer Planes, you'd only have a hilt. Can you use it on the etherial plane for a 50% miss chance? Trinket of Thumb Twiddling This little trinket is perfect for anyone who wants to be just a little bit lazy, but really does not have the time. Two hands are mounted side by side. Upon command, the hands will clasp and begin twiddling the thumbs. A separate command word causes the twiddling to stop. The trinket is currently only available with human, elven, or dwarven hands. Other races are being considered for production. Hook up the tumbs to a machine for infinant amount of power. You might use 10 or more for added torque. Can we at least try to read the item descriptions before commenting on them? Or, was this your own version of a similar item? Last time I checked, generally does not mean always. Cloth of Cleaning (might be something similar, I don't remember.) This cloth will remove hard to remove stains, such as blood, oil, ketchup, mustard, demonic hellfire residue, and sweat without ever becoming soiled itself. It also removes it form difficult to clean surfaces such as thick carpet or dirt. Note that an attempt to clean a dirt floor will result in a significant amount of dirt loss, as the cloth cannot distinguish the floor from the stain. Cloth- wouldn't this make digging much easier?
GalaGalaxia 01-23-07, 04:26 PM	Can you use it on the etherial plane for a 50% miss chance? On the ethereal plane you will not have the 50% mischance from it being ethereal, correct. But, you will carry a penalty from it being 50% material instead.
GalaGalaxia 01-23-07, 04:28 PM	Ring of Infinite Wishes You may wish for any one user not to comment on your magical items in this thread. Couldn't resist :P
Sammael93 01-23-07, 06:54 PM	Ink Drinking Signet Ring-This signet ring looks to be fashioned of the highest quality metals and jewels. However, whenever it is placed against ink or wax, the ring immediately absorbs it. This only works if the ring is being used for its original purpose (for example, if you placed it against a sheet with words written in ink on it, it would do nothing besides make you look foolish). It is a very pretty ring though. Mirror of Remote Future Viewing: If a player looks into this ornately carved, silver handmirror, and makes a DC 10 Concentration check, the mirror will show them a 3 second clip of what they will be doing 1 second into the future from the time of viewing. Everything around the character is pitch-black. No sounds can be detected through the mirror. Gilded Platter-This golden serving platter, when placed in front of someone sitting down at a table, creates an illusion of the creature's preferred meal at the time. Any interaction at all with the illusion reveals it to be false, but the illusion remains. A DC 8 Will save also reveals the falseness of the illusion. {Magical Item} -or- {Weapon} Replica-This ornate item appears to be the exact magical item or weapon it is a replica of, that is, until use. It does not have any of the properties of its real counterpart. It has a Hardness of 1, and a Break DC of 1. Hitting it against something with more than average force immediately breaks it.
Undrhil 01-23-07, 11:56 PM	Disc- Shink as in volume or shrink as in mass? Hat- Soverin glue to BBEG's head. It doesn't interupt the tought proses, but after a week will motivate them to pull. off there skin to stop the noise. Or at the least get them ****** at you. Shrink as in size. Volume and mass will change proportionately. Well, first off, you would have to be able to get the BBEG to allow you to soverign glue the hat to their head. This could prove quite difficult.
GalaGalaxia 01-24-07, 01:39 AM	Trinket of Usefulness ... sort of This item has an answer for every task imaginable. It is a weapon, overcoming any damage reduction, always confirming critical hits ... It is a stat booster, a skill bonus modifier ... a universal "be what you need it to be" -- whatever the task! It holds a limitless array of spells and protective auras. It has the ability of activating any and all abilities at the same time. It is, indeed, the ultimate munchkin item -- except for one tiny detail. The trinket does not function, nor have any of its abilities active, nor can they be activated, at any time when such an ability or modifier would make any difference, whether for good or bad. Are you about to jump? The item may grant you a +2 to your Diplomacy check ... That is, assuming you are not performing a Diplomacy check at the time. Are you attacking? Congratulations! You were just imbued with a temporary surge of the Track feat. Are you badly hurt and in need of healing? Well, there you go ... the trinket just cast prestidigitation on you, but to no effect. It can single handedly kill (yes, "kill") the Tarrasque in a single blow, but would never do so. The ultimate useful item! Except, it's not useful for anything useful ... Heck, you can't even throw it at someone.
DDdreamer 01-24-07, 04:24 AM	Im so gonna use that mwahahaha:schemes:
GalaGalaxia 01-24-07, 12:34 PM	... perhaps it is just an illusion, which those with a divine rank can see through with a Will DC 2000?
GalaGalaxia 01-25-07, 01:04 PM	:bump:
Mock26 01-25-07, 04:05 PM	Back in the days of 1st edition D&D, when the very first Unearthed Arcana came out, there was a magic item called the Anything Item. This extremely rare and powerful magic item could transform into just about any magic item listed in the DMG or the Unearthed Aracana (except for Artifacts and potions and I think items that required charges). So, you could command it to be a Portable Hole one round and a Decanter of Endless Water the next turn and a Deck of Many Things the next and so on and so on and so on. The catch was that you could never repeat an item it had already been. I once had a player Wish for one of these items. Of course, he didn't put much thought into his wish and I granted him an Anything Item. Little did he realize that it had already been used extensively by a group of adventurers and could only transform into one item, and that was a magical spoon that made a nutritious gruel that tasted like wet cardboard.
GalaGalaxia 01-30-07, 01:22 PM	Flag of Waving This flag, when held outside, will wave as if affected by a light breeze.
Raymond_Luxury_Yacht 01-30-07, 01:45 PM	Can you use it on the etherial plane for a 50% miss chance? No. You won't have a hilt.
stargate525 01-30-07, 01:57 PM	Throw it into the middle of the room, so the NPCs stare at it, and try to figure out what it does while you sneak around. Useless as both a thrown object and as a distraction. You have yet to defeat the box! Cloth- wouldn't this make digging much easier? I never said how fast it absorbed the stuff, did I. Also, you would waste a large amount of... something... in order to stain the dirt. The cloth may not be smart, but it isn't stupid. It does realize it's impossible to clean dirt off a dirt floor, it just takes time to realize that it's not simply a heavily covered table.
GalaGalaxia 01-30-07, 03:21 PM	I'm beginning to think that the box is simply an illusion, or perhaps a figment of your own imagination. It clearly cannot be used to obstruct view in anyway. While, at the same time it cannot be seen through. The box cannot take up space, nor ... it's just useless.
Undrhil 01-30-07, 04:59 PM	Boots of Movement These boots make the wearer think that they are moving faster than normal. In reality, the wearer's speed does not change.
Undrhil 01-30-07, 05:03 PM	Back in the days of 1st edition D&D, when the very first Unearthed Arcana came out, there was a magic item called the Anything Item. This extremely rare and powerful magic item could transform into just about any magic item listed in the DMG or the Unearthed Aracana (except for Artifacts and potions and I think items that required charges). So, you could command it to be a Portable Hole one round and a Decanter of Endless Water the next turn and a Deck of Many Things the next and so on and so on and so on. The catch was that you could never repeat an item it had already been. I once had a player Wish for one of these items. Of course, he didn't put much thought into his wish and I granted him an Anything Item. Little did he realize that it had already been used extensively by a group of adventurers and could only transform into one item, and that was a magical spoon that made a nutritious gruel that tasted like wet cardboard. And the original owner of that particular Anything Item was probably very upset that they didn't get to use it to turn into the Spoon of Gruel. They cried for the next week and your selfish PC probably threw the thing away. Shame on him! Next time, he should wish for an unused Anything Item or one which had been discarded and not used for a few decades. :-D (Of course, this could be because it's been all used up, but the character would need to define that in the wish, huh?)
GospelofRob 01-30-07, 10:31 PM	Mech Mage, given enough time and thought you can make a use out of anythin. (Yes even that perfectly useless box, never know when someone just needs a useless box) Exploding Pick Everytime it is swung into a rock wall, a massive blast throws the user 5 feet back and deafens the user. (Note: this would provoke AoO) Rubber Mouse Every damsal in distress instantly panics at the sight of this cute little mouse. They act as panicked (sp?) and shaken for one round afterward. (DC 5 will save negates)
Adrian_Crane 01-30-07, 11:03 PM	Exploding Pick Everytime it is swung into a rock wall, a massive blast throws the user 5 feet back and deafens the user. (Note: this would provoke AoO) Rubber Mouse Every damsal in distress instantly panics at the sight of this cute little mouse. They act as panicked (sp?) and shaken for one round afterward. (DC 5 will save negates) Both of these are useful! The first is a great trap for, say, your local kobold. He'll certainly appreciate this very gnomish trick. The second...well, DUH. NOOKIE! Defeat the mouse, and you're in! HOW could that be considered useless?! Besides, even if you don't get all the way, you at least have an opportunity to make an AoO and grapple said damsel while claiming to be "holding her in a supportive fashion"
LordQuazk 01-31-07, 12:39 AM	Post of Disapproval This item tells MechMage that he is being kind of a jerk by saying "Oh, no, you can't have that item in this thread, it's not useless!", because it deters anyone from posting creative and interesting ideas for items. Way to go. ((Yeah, this item probably isn't too useless..))
Leon_Cross 01-31-07, 05:03 AM	One of my friends was telling me about a game he ran through. The DM gave him a ring of plus 1 to melee attack and AC. Come to find out, the said effect was cast out in a 10 foot radius, making whatever opponets he was meleeing have the same bonus :)
Aberlonian 01-31-07, 01:46 PM	Flaming Greataxe of Bluffing An ordinary looking iron rod, when activated, takes the illusion of a flaming greataxe that is a little larger and more threatening than a typical flaming greataxe. As an illusion, causes no damage in actual combat but grants +5 circumstance bonus to bluff and intimidation checks (Will DC 15 Negates).
Illithid_Tentacles 01-31-07, 11:50 PM	Socks of Smelling When the command word is said, these nondescript socks begin to emit an odor that can be decteded by anyone within 5 feet. The odor is that of unwashed feet and fermented sweat. This effect cannot be dismissed or ended via any means other than a Dispel Magic spell. Nosering of Running A nosering that causes the wearer's nose to be perpetually runny. Glass of Refilling An ordinary glass that, once per day, can refill itself with whatever liquid was in it last. This causes the actual liquid that was last in it to be drawn back into it, which can be a somewhat disgusting sight if the liquid last in it was drunk by someone. Useful for those who dislike spilling thier drinks, however. Doesn't work on magical or enchanted liquids, or poisons. Pepper Mill and Salt Shaker of Perfect Seasoning A pepper mill and salt shaker set that never distribue too much or too little of thier respective spices for the taste of the person using them.
Bandolar Goldcrest 02-16-07, 03:45 AM	Endless Rope This rope has no end, or begining for that matter. It is a circle of rope with a 4" diameter.
Gemmalah 02-16-07, 10:55 AM	a deck of cards that shuffle themselves and could even deal themselves (could only play certain games) a spoon that when put in milk whisks it untill frothy! milkshakes anyone? a box of salt that never runs out except you may only take a pinch per round (to stop people pouring out a pile of salt) when reduced to eating things you found in the woods those with low suvival skill may be greatful. a quill that casts exploding runes in dissapearing ink. disapears almost instantly after writing so the spell cannot be activated. self help hat a hat that when worn casts a suggestion on the wearer to think positively. Sleep hat when making listen checks while sleeping you ordinarily get a -5 pentalty on listen checks (i think) this hat which is a sleeping cap makes the penalty -10 so you may get a peaceful nights sleep with noisy neighbours. Qualls feather feather token this token is a small feather token when activated it turns into a bigger feather. (or perhaps a feather duster) Wallet of holding acts like a bag of holding but only holds coins Ion Marble an ion stone like object that gives you a bonus to playing marbles and it can also act as your shooter. comb of prestigitation when used on hair makes it look shiney and soft for a short while. can also be used on fur. minature zen garden a tiny animated object which is a carved garden and animals that act is if they are real. relaxing to watch possibly a desk toy. A necklace that once worn cannot be removed it provides no bonus but takes up the necklace/amulet body slot for magical items. A ring of featherfall that only negates 2ft of falling, if you fall off a chair you won't get a bruise. It only works for 2ft or less falls and any fall bigger than that it won't work. (good for ladies prone to fainting) jumping up and down won't activate it (as this could allow players to try to avoid floor traps or something) In my games i gave the players a potion of cure light headaches, they used it as a hangover cure! a umbrella with blink cast on it. only lets in 50% of the rain. Cheese knife bonus to cutting cheese too blunt to cut anything else. OK not all of these are utterly useless but considering most players are resorseful enough to find a use for anything!
amatulic 04-05-07, 02:21 PM	I've been dreaming up mischievously useless items that seem highly valuable when detect magic is cast on them but serve no useful purpose. While they have a high cost to produce due to their spell effects, they have effectively zero market value due to uselessness. +1 Healing Heavy Mace - Deals 1d8+1 damage simultanously with a 1d8+1 healing from cure light wounds. Roll separately for damage and healing. EDIT: It has been pointed out that this item can be rather valuable when used against undead (2d8+2 damage) or when applying it to yourself or an ally as subdual damage (so you get 1d8+1 healing plus healing of the subdual damage dealt). In this case the item should be introduced at higher levels, or limited to 3 uses per day. Standing Staff - A magical staff that does nothing but balance on one end. Costs 2000 gp to make, using levitate. Portal Tube - a telescoping, 2-foot long, 1-inch diameter metal tube with a portal on each end. Stick your finger in one end and you see it come out the other end, 2 feet away! Look through it and you see out the other end as if you're looking through a ring rather than a long tube. Uses a continuously-active dimension door as the underlying spell. Darklight Gem - On command, this gem glows brightly with magical daylight illuminating a 20-foot radius, simultaneously surrounded by a 20-foot sphere of magical darkness (the net effect is cancellation of both effects). Faux Shield - This appears to be a sturdy shield of normal weight, but is actually an insubstantial illusion offering no defense. Uses illusory wall and a spell that increases weight, which I can't remember at the moment. Belt of Vertigous Flight - On command, gain the benefits of fly for one round while subjected to the vertigo (PH2) spell. During that round, you take a -4 penalty to all Dex-based skill checks, ranged attack rolls, and Reflex saves, and you are considered flat-footed. No save (a successful save cancels all effects, including flight). On the following round you are dazed. (Actually this item does have uses, for crossing chasms and such so it may have a market value.) I can think of several more. The point of my exercise was to make seemingly expensive items that no one would want. -A
Nundahl 04-10-07, 08:10 PM	I've appreciated this thread so much, I want to try my hand at it as well ... so, that being said *clears throat* a few magical trinkets and such that I have created: Image Book While expensive, these books are favored amongst the nobility teaching young ones to read. A silent image spell brings the illustrations of the lesson to life in both motion and a "pop-up" appearance. Levard's Naughty Picturebook This book, plain enough in appearance, contains silent image spells of beautiful and exotic women of various races performing acts that would make even the most abominable commoner blush. As an added benefit, should the user wish it, at will the book will transmute itself into one of four classic pieces of literature including A History of all Things, The Dragon Speaks, Krill's Topographical Atlas, and The King and the Nalfeshnee. Tea Pot of Exotic Tastes As the conveniences of magic rise the good folk tire of waiting for the shipping routes to deliver teas from across the world. Instead, those who can afford it purchase these tea pots which, when filled with water and heated for several minutes, can produce a brew similar to any plain leaf tea imaginable. The pot can only be used once per day, and the user must provide water and a heat source for the effect to work, as well as any additional flavorings such as sugar, honey, or spices. While less can be made if preferred, the pot can brew no more than 7 cups at a time. Encrypted Paper Sold in individual sheets, this parchment is gilded with gold threading and the symbols of the notary guild which provided it. The effect on this paper allows a message to be written to an individual specified after its completion. When the letter is sealed with any wax, the letters of the message jumble randomly. The letters will only rearrange themselves for the appropriate recipient, any interceptor of the message will find only a random arrangement of characters. Should one attempt to "unscramble" the letters, a decipher script check can potentially discover the answer (DC variable based on message length - recommended at least 25), however using only the original message proves to be a frustrating process unless the decrypting individual succeeds a DC 30 Spot check to notice letters constantly rearranging themselves by fading in and out as new letters. (Breaking the encryption in an anti-magic zone negates the need for a spot check, transcribing the message yields a 30% chance that letters while change during the process, and the DC 30 Spot check should be applied in such a case as well).
PwnageLlama 04-10-07, 09:08 PM	Use a "Useless" box to obstucct someones view.
ArgulFraster 08-08-07, 11:06 PM	Pillow of Infinite Dreams This is a magical, black, silk pillow embroidered with silvered string. Whoever sleeps on this pillow may, before sleeping, choose what he wants to dream. I know EXACTLY what I want to do with this. It involves catgirls. :devil: But yeah. Next coupla things. Fan Of Breezes This fan does nothing but follow you around providing a cooling breeze just powerful enough to feel cool without being overchilled. Its abilities are negated under certain conditions; it will not function under 50 degrees Fahrenheit or over 98. Minor transmutation, 50 GP, animate objects Mug of Writing Utensils This ceramic mug is lightly gilded and apparently contains a handful of writing utensils (pencil, pen, quill pen, etc). No matter how many are pulled out, there are still more. After 1d10+5 are pulled out, no more will come out until the previous ones are replaced, either the exact utensils removed or others.
Mock26 08-08-07, 11:15 PM	Wand of Magical Wand Creation. This wand can never have more than 1 charge. When a single charge is used the wand creates an exact duplicate of itself and the old wand becomes an ordinary stick.
The_Ryan 08-09-07, 03:21 AM	Wand of Magical Wand Creation. This wand can never have more than 1 charge. When a single charge is used the wand creates an exact duplicate of itself and the old wand becomes an ordinary stick. Not useless. Free firewood for the rest of your life.
boozerker 08-12-07, 12:25 AM	Not useless. Free firewood for the rest of your life. Simple -- in 1d6 rounds, each previous wand starts looking ethereal and then vanishes.
icuall 10-15-07, 02:27 PM	Book Reader - A 6" brass statue of an educated man or scribe looking man reading a book out load. Book Reader reads aloud the book's content in a clear normal coversational tone. User and anybody in 30' radius is able to hear the Book Reader. Book Reader item only knows one language. (Fragile)If the Book Reader is damaged, item ceases to function. Directions: Place the Book Reader on the cover of a closed book. Commands: Begin, pause, back (by sentence) continue, & stop. Wealthy purchase Book Readers as a sign of wealth or pleasure "reading" while having nightcap or for the pleasure of company to share a good book. Also used fool thieves someone is home by hearing someone talking in the home/room.
Amon_V 10-15-07, 05:30 PM	Erm. No, this isn't right at all. Some the magic items with 'mundane uses' are essentially low-magic toys worth 100 Gp or so. Few of these things are actually useless, and some of them can be made to work well. *The Waltzing Belt and Balls of Juggling essentially are performance boosters. *Ring of Pleasant Dreams offers immunity to the Nightmare spell, as well as the Night Hags Dream Riding ability. *Try throwing the Snowball against a Fire Elemental. *+5 diplomacy check is very useful *The Lie Detector is lot more effective if you have eight of them; then, when four of them go off, you've got a lie on your hands. *The Cloth dissolver is Instant death against a Raggamoffin. *Shriekers are great alarms against theft. *The Cloning Gem is Fraud and Conartistry in the palm of your hand. *Secret case is very useful. And it would be fun to meet this Alyssa.
Kozeljnik 10-16-07, 01:02 PM	these items are supposed to be more or less useless, but i don't doubt that someone will come up with a way to destroy the earth using one of them and a spool of endless rope... Finian's Incredible Sundial Created by the famous gnome bard, this is simply a small sundial that can be strapped to the wrist. A Dancing Light (sheds light like a candle) orbits the dial, in case of a cloudy day, or if one happens to find himself underground. Hamfists These rough leather gloves smell faintly like roasted ham, and when donned turn the user's hands into two huge haunches of... well, ham (roll for dry-cured or wet-cured). The Hamfists turn back to gloves after 1D4 minutes. In addition, a wearer may season any ham to perfection with a touch. Perfectly Safe Stein This beerstein may be cracked over anyone's head without hurting them. it slowly regrows after being broken (a la T-1000 from Terminator 2). A part of the Perfectly Safe Tavern furniture set.
Lord QZip 10-16-07, 10:31 PM	I figured you guys would've come up with this one already but... Solor-Powered Torch - This torch is exactly the same as an Everburning Torch except it only works when the sun is directly shining on it (thus doesn't work if clouds/trees/buildings/anything is in the way). No other light source turns it on and it stops immediately the moment that sunlight is no longer directly shining on it. Koblin's Book of Infinite Knowledge - This book will have whatever the owner wants to know about written on the page. The only problem is, the information is written in the language "Uncommon". Uncommon is a language that can not be understood by any race or god in existence or it will cease to be.
Unluckylukey 10-17-07, 03:01 AM	I could use 75 at home with my wife
Unluckylukey 10-17-07, 03:05 AM	Sword kobold slayer. +1 +10 against Kobolds. Must have 18str to wield.
boozerker 10-19-07, 09:44 PM	Quill Tender A floating ink bottle that activates when its quill is picked up, and follows your hand for convenience of ink re-dipping. The quill is a feather of cockatrice.
icuall 10-24-07, 02:26 PM	Invisible Spectacle (aka glasses) Glasses are invisible. Wizard who was creating this intended to create spectacle that would see invisible creatures/objects. However, he goofed up and the glasses are invisible - with correctable lenses that adjust to anybody. Glasses do not let you see/locate invisible creatures or objects. Glasses are hard to find if you misplace them. (ha ha, i crack myself up :D )
Sphyre 10-24-07, 03:35 PM	Invisible Spectacle (aka glasses) Glasses are invisible. Wizard who was creating this intended to create spectacle that would see invisible creatures/objects. However, he goofed up and the glasses are invisible - with correctable lenses that adjust to anybody. Glasses do not let you see/locate invisible creatures or objects. Glasses are hard to find if you misplace them. (ha ha, i crack myself up :D ) They fill the same role as contacts!
boozerker 10-25-07, 04:59 AM	Has anyone done invisible paint yet? :D
Erk_ 10-26-07, 01:13 AM	Wow, kinda sad how many people don't get the point. A truly useless item is no fun, but many GMs have need of a few semi-useless items that can be handed out to PCs for the fun of identifying a magic item, without granting tons of wealth or power. I'm compiling this stuff into a word document for my game :) just the items I like, and a lot have been modified, but I am keepin' credit. Will post it when I am done! My contributions so far: Pronto's Kitchen: Pronto was a famous mage-chef many years ago. So impressive was the work of his kitchen that two kingdoms fought a war over who would have the right to employ him as their head chef. Though Pronto is long dead, he kept detailed recipe books and records of how to recreate his tools and successes. Nevertheless, no one has ever again achieved quite his level of expertise. Pronto's Powdered Water This small leather pouch contains 10 teaspoons of dry, odorless powder that becomes clean drinking water when placed in a suitable vessel. A teaspoon of powder will fill a drinking glass. The bag can be recharged by filling it with powdered glass and holding it in a river for an hour. Pronto's Stone Spoon An ordinary looking soupsoon that can dip into ordinary stone as if it were thin liquid. The spoonful of stone can be eaten like soup or mixed into foods; it is edible even to non-lithovorous creatures. Different stones have distinct and different flavours. Rumour has it Pronto favoured granite as a seasoning in his soups. Pronto's Finger Friend This knife is always razor sharp when cutting nonliving, nonanimated organic materials; it is blunt and soft against any inorganic, animated, or living matter. (adapted from a few ideas around here) Pronto's Platter A rather nice looking dinner tray. Any food slopped onto it will organise itself into an elegant, attractive presentation as much as possible with the food supplied. Capable of generating its own parsley as needed. Even as food is removed from the platter, the food left reorganises to remain appealing. Pronto's Polish Any vessel rubbed with Pronto's Polish will behave like a Pronto's Platter for one meal. Besides the obvious, many hosts even polish their flatware with it: the food remains lovely even while on a guest's spoon. Pronto's Pretender This small ebony wand remembers any flavour or seasoning it has been "taught" by touching it to that seasoning and saying its name. When touched to one seasoning it already knows, and told the name of another it knows, it will alter the touched seasoning's flavour to match. Flavours revert after 2 days. Pronto's Unwatched Pot The moment the lid to this pot is closed, it becomes invisible except for the handles. Any nonmagical liquid in this pot boils as soon as it disappears. The pot itself never becomes hot, nor does anything inorganic inside it. Because the pot stays cool, nothing sticks to it. Pronto's Convenient Reader (Thanks, icuall) A 6" brass statue of a humanoid reading a book out loud. When placed on a closed book, it reads that book out loud in a pleasant, conversational tone (the ones made by Pronto speak in his voice and are highly coveted). Anybody in 30' radius is able to hear it, though the volume can be decreased. It only knows one language, and understands simple commands (read slower, wait a moment, read the recipe for tuna casserole). If there is even a trace of magic on the book, the reader will refuse vocally to read it - even Pronto didn't want anyone sneaking through his spellbook's defenses. Pronto's Sanitary This simple square of plain white cloth appears to be a Cloth of Cleaning (posted earlier by stargate525) and behaves as one. However, on a command word, it flies into the air and floats just out of the activator's way. On a second command word, it whisks down and scrubs the activator's hands clean, then flies back out of the way. More expensive versions can also be commanded to clean specific objects or surfaces. Other stuff Glasses of Read Nonsense When worn, these will "translate" anything the wearer cannot read but believes to be writing. The writing will seem greatly valuable to the wearer, but as soon as the glasses are removed the meaning fades as if in a dream. Anyone attempting to identify the glasses must make a dc20 will check or believe that they do, in fact, work as translation glasses. Loupe of Appraisal This rune-engraved jeweler's loupe makes the wearer believe that any item she expects to be valuable in fact is valuable. Just as the glasses of read nonsense, identifiers must make a dc20 will check or believe the item gives true appraisals. Xero's Incredible Top When spun, this top spins normally for 1d4 rounds. It appears ordinary but cannot be stopped from spinning by any force, until its duration expires. Standing on it will cause the stander to spin rapidly and become nauseated for 1 round. Patterned bag of tricks These bags are available in the same colours/types as ordinary bags of tricks, but patterned with hearts and stars and other whimsical ornaments. The animals drawn out are plush. Pillow of Clear Dreams (thought of this one before I'd even seen this thread) The sleeper's dreams can be seen in their eyes. They still sleep with their eyes closed unless something opens their eyes without them waking up. Wand of Hair Any surface touched with this wand sprouts hair. The thickness of the hairs can be determined by the wielder, from silk-fine to quill-thick. The hairs grow 1d6+2 inches long at a rate of 1 inch per round, then fall out. Disc of Liquidity This 3" diameter metallic disc turns to liquid on command, and reforms again on command. The liquid has a hardness of 10, just like metal: it does not splash or drip or fall apart, it remains a single fused piece. If broken by force, it hardens to metal and loses all magic. The disc will not reform if anything is in its way (eg. it is in a cramped space). -a 3' long "rod of liquidity" and 10' long "pole of liquidity" also exist. Flenser This 2-foot long rod becomes soft, stretchy, and flexible at a command word. Repeating the command word hardens it back to metal, and a second command word causes it to reform as a rod. Copytongue stone Placing this smooth, oblong stone on top of your tongue and speaking causes it to remember your voice. Placing it under your tongue and speaking changes your voice to the one stored in the copytongue stone. The stone resists sliding any further down your throat, and does not impare speech. Cup of Light Light that shines into this cup becomes a clear, shimmering liquid and slowly fills the cup (and will keep spilling out if the cup is left in the light). If the cup is carried into darkness, the liquid inside it begins to evapourate: it produces the same light as a torch for about the same amount of time. Spilling the liquid doubles the light radius for 10 minutes; then the light all evapourates and is gone. Floating hand This glove must be worn on one hand, then a command word spoken. The command word causes the glove to become momentarily intangible and drift a few inches away from the hand it is on. It will then hang in the air and mimic the movements of the hand that was wearing it when it was worn. It can be picked up and placed in a specific location (it cannot be thrown; as soon as it's not being manipulated it continues to hang in the air), where it will continue to hang. The gloves have a STR of 3. The effects last 1 hour or until the command word is spoken again. Tension String When anchored (even very loosely) at two points and the command word spoken, this string becomes as taught as a bowstring, without putting any tension on the anchor points. Pen of Parrying This odd-looking metal quill can be used normally, but if tied to the arm it behaves in every respect like a buckler. Enchanted versions are possible. Cinching Belt (this one is actually pretty useful if you're creative) The buckle of this belt automatically loops itself and closes as soon as it is wrapped around something, and releases at a command word. It closes to comfortable tightness initially but will tighten on command; it cannot get tight enough to cause damage. Ropole This 10' length of rope straightens into a 10' pole (of rope) on command, provided there is space. Transparency Paste Rubbing this paste on a hard surface will make it transparent for 2 hours. The surface cannot be more than an inch thick.
Erk_ 10-26-07, 03:19 AM	Some more. Uncoiling Helix This appears to be an attractive, but inornate, helix-shaped wood carving (some are made of other materials, like glass or metal). It will uncoil as soon as it is touched, and attempt to squirm away. It has a touch AC of 20. As soon as the chaser leaves it alone, it will revert to its original shape. Loved by kittens everywhere. Backwards Windmill A small model windmill. The blades will turn slowly as long as the air around them is perfectly still; even the slightest breeze will halt the movement. Dancing Beans There are 2d10+10 colourful bean-shaped beads in this small, decorative leather pouch. On command they will leap out of the bag and perform an amusing dance, clattering and bouncing around all available surfaces, then gather up and hop back into their pouch. Lucky Ol' Toby This smooth, silver-flecked skipping stone always returns to the wielder when skipped over water, arcing back like a boomerang. Lucky Ol' Toby's often come in pouches of 10 or 25 and are great gifts for young hobbi... halflings. When not skipped over water they are no different from any other stone. Gruffcomb Popular among a certain sorts of elven males, this comb makes silken blond hair look dark, thick, and a little tangled until washed. This is a coating, not an illusion; however, it always looks a little fake and is no use as a disguise, and has no effect on non-elven users. Toothputty Toothputty looks, to a modern Earth viewer, like chewing gum. When chewed, it drifts towards places in the gums where teeth are missing and fills them, rapidly hardening into a new tooth. The new tooth is distinctly different in colour from all the others around it, even if they are all made with toothputty, but it serves its purpose as a chewer.
theblindman 02-18-08, 02:46 AM	You last visited: 12-25-06 at 09:34 AM This is amazing. I've been gone for a year, and this thread has taken off. (I was in Japan, it was pretty cool) I never dreamed there would be so many useless-magic-items-makers out there (and useles-magic-items-makers-critics). The community never lets you down, I guess. Way to go, everybody. I've naturally made additions to 100 Useless Magic Items Volume II (tentatively titled 200 Useless Magic Items). Nightwing, Raxmei, NyMpHoMaNiAc FaNtAsIA, LordQuazk, Undrhil, Sajek, Sammael93, Rickenbacker, GalaGalaxia, Mock26, Stargate525, GospelofRob, Aberlonian, Illithid_Tentacles, Gemmalah, amatulic, Nundhal, ArgulFraster, Icuall, Kozeljnik, Boozerker, and Erk_, you are all featured. Keep 'em coming. We're at 89, people. 11 more and we're there. I'll be checking back in regularly from now on. A couple of theblindman's favourites. In my games i gave the players a potion of cure light headaches, they used it as a hangover cure! Levard's Naughty Picturebook This book, plain enough in appearance, contains silent image spells of beautiful and exotic women of various races performing acts that would make even the most abominable commoner blush. As an added benefit, should the user wish it, at will the book will transmute itself into one of four classic pieces of literature including A History of all Things, The Dragon Speaks, Krill's Topographical Atlas, and The King and the Nalfeshnee. Cup of Light Light that shines into this cup becomes a clear, shimmering liquid and slowly fills the cup (and will keep spilling out if the cup is left in the light). If the cup is carried into darkness, the liquid inside it begins to evapourate: it produces the same light as a torch for about the same amount of time. Spilling the liquid doubles the light radius for 10 minutes; then the light all evapourates and is gone.
boozerker 02-21-08, 03:07 PM	Ring of Aerial Floating. Like a Ring of Levitation but only works on flying creatures. Dinner Sensing Bell. When the evening supper is ready to eat and a place is set for you, the small triangular bell chimes so you know to "come and get it". Hovering Nose Rooter. Command word summons this disembodied finger out of your pocket to fetch snot in your nose and dispose of it. I've naturally made additions to 100 Useless Magic Items Volume II (tentatively titled 200 Useless Magic Items). Cool. Where is "100 Useless Magic Items Volume I"?
theblindman 02-23-08, 09:06 AM	Hovering Nose Rooter. Command word summons this disembodied finger out of your pocket to fetch snot in your nose and dispose of it. That is gorram creepy. Should be called "Bigby's..." though :p I have the doc in .pdf that I can email to you if you'd like. Otherwise the list is just my first post. Should be going up on Community 3e shortly.
CrawlingChaos 02-23-08, 07:33 PM	Hat of Trap Sense This Hat, designed by a Rogue/Cleric of Garl Glittergold, functions by alerting in audible voice to everyone around the wearer (up to 50 feet away) of the proximity of a hidden trap. However, the Hat only talks after the trap was activated. As a bonus, the voice from the hat is always merry and mood-lifting. **Party falls in a pit. "Warning! a hidden pit is close by! :) "
JaronK 02-24-08, 06:56 AM	Some that are actually in my current campaign (where magic has been horribly damaged, so the vast majority of magic items were drained or destroyed, but a few were just altered). These particular items are all kept in the Museum of Magical Mysteries in the gnomish capital city. Boots of Speed These mighty boots grant a +10' enhancement bonus to speed when worn and fully laced up. Unfortunately, they must be equipped on the hand slot. Toadbane This +1 Toadbane Spoon deals extra damage to any frog or toad. It does, however, have the usual penalty for fighting with an improvised weapon, and deals 1d2 damage. Ember Ember is a -1 Flaming Longsword. Unforunately, it seems to be backwards, as the flames never harm the enemy, but do cause 1d6 points of fire damage to the weilder at the beginning of every round. It's handy as a camp stove, though. Blade of Shadows This Mastercrafted Broadsword, etched with beautiful lightning patterns along the blade, has a strange magical property. It provides a +5 competance bonus to hide checks when worn on the finger (usually by balancing the weapon there). Generally only used by very strong people. Glove of Storing This dangerous item is kept under lock and key after the tragic accident that revealed its magical power. When the command word is spoken, the wearer of the glove is suddenly shrunk down and hidden inside the glove in stasis. It seems that, should the wearer speak the command word again, they would be restored, but since the wearer is now in stasis inside the glove, that would be most difficult. Winged Boots These mighty boots allow the wearer to fly when the command word is spoken. Unfortunately, they don't seem to allow the wearer to control that flight, and instead move the wearer 60' in a random direction each round, often slamming him into walls or the ground with very painful results. A second command word stops the flight. JaronK
CrawlingChaos 02-24-08, 11:31 AM	Nice itens above :)
boozerker 02-27-08, 12:43 AM	That is gorram creepy. Should be called "Bigby's..." though :p You're quite correct. Bigby's even sounds funnier.
theblindman 03-01-08, 02:43 AM	:bump:
rickvoid 03-01-08, 02:26 PM	Ring of Invisibility: At will, the ring becomes invisible. Belt Of Grappling: +5 to grapple checks to keep your pants on. Amulet of Spell Turning: Spells the word turning. Loudly. Rod of Enemy Detection, Lesser: This rod pinpoints the exact location of any creature the user has line of sight to. Cloak of Elvenmind: Anyone who puts on the cloak must succeed on a DC 16 will save or believe themselves to be an elf, disregarding any and all evidence to the contrary. They gain low-light vision but refuse to associate with any non-elves. The Arse-Hat*Cursed*: Appears to be a large foam buttocks. When worn, the hat immediately casts a modified version of stinking cloud, centered on the wearer. It has none of the damaging properties, but anyone exposed to the cloud must make a DC 25 Fortitude save or become nauseated for 1d6 rounds. Caster level for the cloud is equal to that of your character level. The cloud lingers, and does not dissapate unless the hat is removed by a remove curse spell. For as long as the hat is worn the wearer's charisma bonus becomes becomes a penalty (unless already negative, in which case the penalty doubles). The hat is sentient, and is capable of speech of a sort. It can speak only in one sentence outbursts, none of which are overly quiet, friendly, or accurate. It mimics your voice with perfect accuracy, and anyone who hears it speak is convinced that you were the speaker. Kenobi's Cloak: if the wearer dies, his/her body completely vanishes. The spirit of the deceased may continue to interact with one being who witnessed the spirit's death, though will not be able to physically manipulate anything. Anyone with the capability to detect otherwise invisible spirits can detect this one too by using the appropriate skill check. Other beings cannot hear, see, or otherwise detect this spirit. Unfortunately, all this spirit can do is tell you how to play your character better: "You idiot! What are you rolling a pilot check for? Turn off your targeting computer and give me a use the force check instead! That's a +5 difference right there, man! Anakin was a much smarter student than you!" :D