1001 Wise Sayings [Archive] - Wizards Community

1001 Wise Sayings [Archive] - Wizards Community

Post/Author/DateTime Post
Lord_Varos
09-19-06, 04:01 PM Okay, I really didn't intend this to be a "1001" thread, but any thread with the number "1001" in the title seems to attract replies like moths to a lantern.

In my campaign, a very, very old and very, very wise old prophet travels with the party and allows them to spend personal energy (read experience points) to get certain benefits, like healing and temporary "energy" items. He must take any opportunity to spout wise, if often unpractical or unnapplicable, sayings, musings, and quotes. I'm running low on my own ideas, so I'm appealing to your (yes, I mean YOU!) inner reserves of wisdom to give me some stuff I can spew from the old man.

I need 1001 wise sayings. See my sig if you don't know what I mean. The advice needn't apply to real life, but should make sense in the context of D&D. Feel free to borrow, steal, or make up your own.
LCD2YOU
09-19-06, 04:04 PM Some classics:

1: A journey of a 1000 miles begins but with a single step.
2: Never argue with a moron. They'll drag you down to their level and beet you with experience.
3: A fool and his money are soon parting.

Now some "new takes":

4: A Bard and his money are soon partying.
5: Never argue with a Dwarf in full plate armor while you are drunk.
6: Venture not to find evil as it may just want to follow you home.
Paxar
09-19-06, 04:08 PM -It takes a tough man to make a tender chicken.
-Better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.
-You can't get blood from a stone.
-People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.
-People who live in grass houses shouldn't store thrones.

More to come as soon as I can remember them.
Shadow Hammer
09-19-06, 04:10 PM A personal favorite:

- When one is at home, one dreams of adventure. But when one is on an adventure, one dreams of home.
Paxar
09-19-06, 04:12 PM -You can lead an orc to water, but you can't make it bathe... I've tried.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer
09-19-06, 05:25 PM (Signature quote for my next charicter)

'If ever your sent to the Gallows there are three things you must do. Tip the hang man, tell a joke to the croud, and take the drop with a smile'

Some more I've uncovered.
'Power is a sword with no sheath. The more you wave it around the more liable you are to hurt someone with it.'

'There is always a price, always a test, and always a down side you wont see till its too late.'

And from Tad Williams Otherland books, a much quoted line thats saved my life more than once.
'Confident, cocky, lazy, dead.'
DarthCthulu
09-19-06, 05:47 PM --When you can flatten entire cities at a whim, a tendency towards quiet reflection and seeing-things-from-the-other-fellow's-point- of-view is seldom necessary.

--No matter how fast light travels it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it.

--It is not at all simple to understand the simple.

--Every extreme attitude is a flight from the self.
Tiefling_Warlock
09-19-06, 05:48 PM If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen.

Never buy an intelligent potion.
thaylok
09-19-06, 05:52 PM (24)-Don't squat with your spurs on
(25)-Don't set up camp in the middle of the road

Will edit numbers from home *quitting time*
Ziggaraut
09-19-06, 06:41 PM Time for some old classics.

"Give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, you feed him for a lifetime." -Lao Tzu

"He who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones." -Confucius

"Do not throw the arrow that will turn against you." -Kurdish Proverb

"It is from their foes, not their friends, that cities learn the lesson of building high walls." -Aristophanes

"If you speak the truth, keep a foot in the stirrup." -Turkish Proverb

"Them that take the sword, shall perish by the sword." -The Bible, Matthew

"Words have the power to both destroy and heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change our world." -The Buddha

"The wisest men follow their own direction." -Euripides

"A designer knows he has achieved perfection not when there is nothing left to add, but when there is nothing left to take away." -Antoine de Saint-Exupery

"One doesn't discover new lands without losing sight of the shore." -Andre Gide

"Banking establishments are more dangerous than standing armies." -Thomas Jefferson

"There is no wealth like knowledge, no poverty like ignorance." -Ali ibn Abi Talib

"Victorious warriors win first and then go to war, while defeated warriors go to war first and then seek to win." -Sun-Tzu

"The whole is more than the sum of its parts." -Aristotle

Eh... I could do more, but I'm tired.
Paxar
09-19-06, 06:44 PM -Give a man a fish, and there's a man who knows where to go for fish. Teach a man to fish, and you've just destroyed your market base.
DarthCthulu
09-19-06, 06:53 PM -Give a man a fish, and there's a man who knows where to go for fish. Teach a man to fish, and you've just destroyed your market base.

Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life.
AlphaSquirell
09-19-06, 07:54 PM Teach a man to fish, feed him for a day.

Teach a man how to use the Internet, and you won't have to put up with the poor bastard ever again.

~Me

Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't. (see "Indiana Jones")

Small change is often found beneath seat cushions.

History does not record anywhere at any time a religion that has any rational basis. Religion is a crutch for people not strong enough to stand up to the unknown without help. But, like dandruff, most people do have a religion and spend time and money on it and seem to derive considerable pleasure from fiddling with it.

It's amazing how much "mature wisdom" resembles being too tired.

Those who run like hell are bound to end up there.

If you accept admitting faults, you have one less fault to admit.

A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on.

Not a shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious.

Man who lives in a glass house should change clothes in basement.

Certainly the game is rigged! Don't let that stop you. If you don't bet, you can't win.

Little girls, like butterflies, need no excuse.

An elephant: A mouse built to government specifications.

You live and learn. Or you don't live long.

Rub her feet.

Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.

That's enough for now...
thaylok
09-19-06, 07:57 PM n) I Refuse to be accused of being normal. - Thaylok
n+1) Listen to me! -any and every parent
n+2) The King is a fink
halaster
09-19-06, 09:05 PM True friends stab you in the front -Winston Churchill

Two can live as cheaply as one, for half as long.

A cat always lands on its feet.
A slice of toast always lands jelly-side down.
A cat with a slice of jelly-spread toast facing up strapped to its back floats above the ground, forever stuck in a state of quantum indecision.

and on a serious note: when testing the depth of a river, never use both feet.
Kakegoddess
09-19-06, 09:51 PM There's a neat one in Races of Stone my character uses:
If you can see it; it's not the right it.
twad
09-19-06, 10:38 PM Some of these were very funny!

Here are some sites i found that are good.

http://www.coolquotescollection.com/
One quote from there: The horror of finding yourself is to realize that you've been gone.

And you cant go wrong with these two:
http://www.murphys-laws.com/ and
http://www.evilrulers.com/

Oh, and read my sig!
Magus Gar Kan
09-19-06, 10:49 PM Heh, there was a dragon mag that came out that had a list of dwarven proverbs. I can't recall all of them but here are the ones I do:
"When you shake a philosopher's hand, count your fingers."
"You can't get gold by licking the rock."

Also if your don't mind being silly there is always the Confucius say jokes, or you could even go with his actual aphorisms:
"Never impose on others what you would not choose for yourself?"
Drodain
09-19-06, 10:55 PM "Ignorance is a stone not yet polished"
tharivol266
09-19-06, 11:13 PM Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't. (see "Indiana Jones")

one of the best scenes in that movie.....

one should never flirt with the calf infront of one's cash cow
Board_Rider
09-19-06, 11:24 PM A bird in the bush is worth two Datsuns in the garage.

You can lead a horse to water but a dog is still a mans best friend.
obrysii
09-19-06, 11:40 PM "Martivir thric gixustratt tundar"

Draconic for "Please don't disembowel the dwarf"
Tichrimo
09-19-06, 11:49 PM "If you want to keep a hungry weasel in your pocket, it's your business."
"If the bears don't eat you, it's home."
- Binabik, from Tad Williams' Memory, Sorrow, and Thorn series
Jenos_Idanian
09-20-06, 01:06 PM 'The tree has many leaves but only one trunk.'
'As one stalks the crouching tiger, beware the hidden dragon.'
'Whenever anyone says something will be done in five minutes, they're wrong.'
'Never ask the barber if you need a haircut'
'though it poses no threat, the squirrel will not invite a donkey into it home'
'do nothing, leave nothing undone'
'the best swords are kept in their sheaths'
'don't worry over your hat when your neck is on the line'
LCD2YOU
09-20-06, 02:04 PM If you don't know which one it is, make sure that you know which ones it cannot be.

Those that expouse pacifism should be encouraged to make first contact.

The one who goes first is the one who is the most certain.
Herald@Large
09-20-06, 03:12 PM Things can *always* get worse.

[Archer's Motto]: Go ahead and run. You'll just die tired.

He who knows not, and knows not that he knows not, is a fool. Shun him.
He who knows not, and knows that he knows not, is a child. Teach him.
He who knows, and knows not that he knows, is asleep. Wake him.
He who knows, and knows that he knows, is wise. Follow him.

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

If at first you don't succeed, use a hammer.

If at first you don't succeed, read the directions, dummy!
kliate
09-20-06, 03:33 PM "A fool is the halfling with a crossbow in hand who drops it to wrestle an Orc."

"When the sky is filled with dragons, the lands with demons and the soil with bullettes - it's time to teleport out."

"Which do you say is better: The courageous and deceased, or the coward who drinks alone?"

"Shatter not the world when an arrow will suffice."

"When a devil smiles and nods, look twice more at the contract."

"One arrow may pierce a heart, one thousand may pierce a nation."
Arganis
09-20-06, 04:04 PM All kinds of little quotes are available in the Tao te Ching (http://www.wam.umd.edu/~stwright/rel/tao/TaoTeChing.html)
Conshey
09-20-06, 05:41 PM The answer to your questions can be found within yourself.

One knows not himself until he has known why his enemies are his enemies.

Elves will laugh, and Centuars will run; but call a Dwarf short and you'll wish you hadn't been the Elf.

One man may make a house, but 100 could make a fortress.

It is not a question of who is wise, the question is who knows that they know nothing.

It is the sword that is the power, King and the like. But it is the swordsman that you have to defeat.

and also check my sig

Conshey
CPAtheFat
09-20-06, 05:51 PM He who fights and runs away, will live to run away another day.

When the going gets tough, the tough get going in their pants.
Piggyfreak6
09-20-06, 06:18 PM A slip of the foot you will soon recover, a slip of the tongue you may never forget.

One must be poor to know the luxury of giving.

Take hold lightly; let go lightly. This is one of the great secrets of felicity in love.

When you have given nothing, ask for nothing.

Do not protect yourself by a fence, but rather by your friends.

Glass, china and reputation are easily cracked, and never well mended.
Nived
09-20-06, 06:49 PM Every decision can be broken down into essentially two choices. The easy one, and the right one.
-Me, but I'm sure a wiser man thought of it first.

The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue.
-Anonymous

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.
-Robert Benchley

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man.
-Mark Twain

Post/Author/DateTime	Post
Lord_Varos 09-19-06, 04:01 PM	Okay, I really didn't intend this to be a "1001" thread, but any thread with the number "1001" in the title seems to attract replies like moths to a lantern. In my campaign, a very, very old and very, very wise old prophet travels with the party and allows them to spend personal energy (read experience points) to get certain benefits, like healing and temporary "energy" items. He must take any opportunity to spout wise, if often unpractical or unnapplicable, sayings, musings, and quotes. I'm running low on my own ideas, so I'm appealing to your (yes, I mean YOU!) inner reserves of wisdom to give me some stuff I can spew from the old man. I need 1001 wise sayings. See my sig if you don't know what I mean. The advice needn't apply to real life, but should make sense in the context of D&D. Feel free to borrow, steal, or make up your own.
LCD2YOU 09-19-06, 04:04 PM	Some classics: 1: A journey of a 1000 miles begins but with a single step. 2: Never argue with a moron. They'll drag you down to their level and beet you with experience. 3: A fool and his money are soon parting. Now some "new takes": 4: A Bard and his money are soon partying. 5: Never argue with a Dwarf in full plate armor while you are drunk. 6: Venture not to find evil as it may just want to follow you home.
Paxar 09-19-06, 04:08 PM	-It takes a tough man to make a tender chicken. -Better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt. -You can't get blood from a stone. -People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. -People who live in grass houses shouldn't store thrones. More to come as soon as I can remember them.
Shadow Hammer 09-19-06, 04:10 PM	A personal favorite: - When one is at home, one dreams of adventure. But when one is on an adventure, one dreams of home.
Paxar 09-19-06, 04:12 PM	-You can lead an orc to water, but you can't make it bathe... I've tried.
Eled_the_Worm_Tamer 09-19-06, 05:25 PM	(Signature quote for my next charicter) 'If ever your sent to the Gallows there are three things you must do. Tip the hang man, tell a joke to the croud, and take the drop with a smile' Some more I've uncovered. 'Power is a sword with no sheath. The more you wave it around the more liable you are to hurt someone with it.' 'There is always a price, always a test, and always a down side you wont see till its too late.' And from Tad Williams Otherland books, a much quoted line thats saved my life more than once. 'Confident, cocky, lazy, dead.'
DarthCthulu 09-19-06, 05:47 PM	--When you can flatten entire cities at a whim, a tendency towards quiet reflection and seeing-things-from-the-other-fellow's-point- of-view is seldom necessary. --No matter how fast light travels it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it. --It is not at all simple to understand the simple. --Every extreme attitude is a flight from the self.
Tiefling_Warlock 09-19-06, 05:48 PM	If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen. Never buy an intelligent potion.
thaylok 09-19-06, 05:52 PM	(24)-Don't squat with your spurs on (25)-Don't set up camp in the middle of the road Will edit numbers from home quitting time
Ziggaraut 09-19-06, 06:41 PM	Time for some old classics. "Give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, you feed him for a lifetime." -Lao Tzu "He who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones." -Confucius "Do not throw the arrow that will turn against you." -Kurdish Proverb "It is from their foes, not their friends, that cities learn the lesson of building high walls." -Aristophanes "If you speak the truth, keep a foot in the stirrup." -Turkish Proverb "Them that take the sword, shall perish by the sword." -The Bible, Matthew "Words have the power to both destroy and heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change our world." -The Buddha "The wisest men follow their own direction." -Euripides "A designer knows he has achieved perfection not when there is nothing left to add, but when there is nothing left to take away." -Antoine de Saint-Exupery "One doesn't discover new lands without losing sight of the shore." -Andre Gide "Banking establishments are more dangerous than standing armies." -Thomas Jefferson "There is no wealth like knowledge, no poverty like ignorance." -Ali ibn Abi Talib "Victorious warriors win first and then go to war, while defeated warriors go to war first and then seek to win." -Sun-Tzu "The whole is more than the sum of its parts." -Aristotle Eh... I could do more, but I'm tired.
Paxar 09-19-06, 06:44 PM	-Give a man a fish, and there's a man who knows where to go for fish. Teach a man to fish, and you've just destroyed your market base.
DarthCthulu 09-19-06, 06:53 PM	-Give a man a fish, and there's a man who knows where to go for fish. Teach a man to fish, and you've just destroyed your market base. Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life.
AlphaSquirell 09-19-06, 07:54 PM	Teach a man to fish, feed him for a day. Teach a man how to use the Internet, and you won't have to put up with the poor bastard ever again. ~Me Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't. (see "Indiana Jones") Small change is often found beneath seat cushions. History does not record anywhere at any time a religion that has any rational basis. Religion is a crutch for people not strong enough to stand up to the unknown without help. But, like dandruff, most people do have a religion and spend time and money on it and seem to derive considerable pleasure from fiddling with it. It's amazing how much "mature wisdom" resembles being too tired. Those who run like hell are bound to end up there. If you accept admitting faults, you have one less fault to admit. A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on. Not a shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious. Man who lives in a glass house should change clothes in basement. Certainly the game is rigged! Don't let that stop you. If you don't bet, you can't win. Little girls, like butterflies, need no excuse. An elephant: A mouse built to government specifications. You live and learn. Or you don't live long. Rub her feet. Never underestimate the power of human stupidity. That's enough for now...
thaylok 09-19-06, 07:57 PM	n) I Refuse to be accused of being normal. - Thaylok n+1) Listen to me! -any and every parent n+2) The King is a fink
halaster 09-19-06, 09:05 PM	True friends stab you in the front -Winston Churchill Two can live as cheaply as one, for half as long. A cat always lands on its feet. A slice of toast always lands jelly-side down. A cat with a slice of jelly-spread toast facing up strapped to its back floats above the ground, forever stuck in a state of quantum indecision. and on a serious note: when testing the depth of a river, never use both feet.
Kakegoddess 09-19-06, 09:51 PM	There's a neat one in Races of Stone my character uses: If you can see it; it's not the right it.
twad 09-19-06, 10:38 PM	Some of these were very funny! Here are some sites i found that are good. http://www.coolquotescollection.com/ One quote from there: The horror of finding yourself is to realize that you've been gone. And you cant go wrong with these two: http://www.murphys-laws.com/ and http://www.evilrulers.com/ Oh, and read my sig!
Magus Gar Kan 09-19-06, 10:49 PM	Heh, there was a dragon mag that came out that had a list of dwarven proverbs. I can't recall all of them but here are the ones I do: "When you shake a philosopher's hand, count your fingers." "You can't get gold by licking the rock." Also if your don't mind being silly there is always the Confucius say jokes, or you could even go with his actual aphorisms: "Never impose on others what you would not choose for yourself?"
Drodain 09-19-06, 10:55 PM	"Ignorance is a stone not yet polished"
tharivol266 09-19-06, 11:13 PM	Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't. (see "Indiana Jones") one of the best scenes in that movie..... one should never flirt with the calf infront of one's cash cow
Board_Rider 09-19-06, 11:24 PM	A bird in the bush is worth two Datsuns in the garage. You can lead a horse to water but a dog is still a mans best friend.
obrysii 09-19-06, 11:40 PM	"Martivir thric gixustratt tundar" Draconic for "Please don't disembowel the dwarf"
Tichrimo 09-19-06, 11:49 PM	"If you want to keep a hungry weasel in your pocket, it's your business." "If the bears don't eat you, it's home." - Binabik, from Tad Williams' Memory, Sorrow, and Thorn series
Jenos_Idanian 09-20-06, 01:06 PM	'The tree has many leaves but only one trunk.' 'As one stalks the crouching tiger, beware the hidden dragon.' 'Whenever anyone says something will be done in five minutes, they're wrong.' 'Never ask the barber if you need a haircut' 'though it poses no threat, the squirrel will not invite a donkey into it home' 'do nothing, leave nothing undone' 'the best swords are kept in their sheaths' 'don't worry over your hat when your neck is on the line'
LCD2YOU 09-20-06, 02:04 PM	If you don't know which one it is, make sure that you know which ones it cannot be. Those that expouse pacifism should be encouraged to make first contact. The one who goes first is the one who is the most certain.
Herald@Large 09-20-06, 03:12 PM	Things can always get worse. [Archer's Motto]: Go ahead and run. You'll just die tired. He who knows not, and knows not that he knows not, is a fool. Shun him. He who knows not, and knows that he knows not, is a child. Teach him. He who knows, and knows not that he knows, is asleep. Wake him. He who knows, and knows that he knows, is wise. Follow him. If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried. If at first you don't succeed, use a hammer. If at first you don't succeed, read the directions, dummy!
kliate 09-20-06, 03:33 PM	"A fool is the halfling with a crossbow in hand who drops it to wrestle an Orc." "When the sky is filled with dragons, the lands with demons and the soil with bullettes - it's time to teleport out." "Which do you say is better: The courageous and deceased, or the coward who drinks alone?" "Shatter not the world when an arrow will suffice." "When a devil smiles and nods, look twice more at the contract." "One arrow may pierce a heart, one thousand may pierce a nation."
Arganis 09-20-06, 04:04 PM	All kinds of little quotes are available in the Tao te Ching (http://www.wam.umd.edu/~stwright/rel/tao/TaoTeChing.html)
Conshey 09-20-06, 05:41 PM	The answer to your questions can be found within yourself. One knows not himself until he has known why his enemies are his enemies. Elves will laugh, and Centuars will run; but call a Dwarf short and you'll wish you hadn't been the Elf. One man may make a house, but 100 could make a fortress. It is not a question of who is wise, the question is who knows that they know nothing. It is the sword that is the power, King and the like. But it is the swordsman that you have to defeat. and also check my sig Conshey
CPAtheFat 09-20-06, 05:51 PM	He who fights and runs away, will live to run away another day. When the going gets tough, the tough get going in their pants.
Piggyfreak6 09-20-06, 06:18 PM	A slip of the foot you will soon recover, a slip of the tongue you may never forget. One must be poor to know the luxury of giving. Take hold lightly; let go lightly. This is one of the great secrets of felicity in love. When you have given nothing, ask for nothing. Do not protect yourself by a fence, but rather by your friends. Glass, china and reputation are easily cracked, and never well mended.
Nived 09-20-06, 06:49 PM	Every decision can be broken down into essentially two choices. The easy one, and the right one. -Me, but I'm sure a wiser man thought of it first. The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue. -Anonymous A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. -Robert Benchley If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man. -Mark Twain