Post/Author/DateTime	Post
AntiDjinn 01-03-04, 02:29 AM	Well, I doubt we will actually get 101 (especially if this thread falls flat). I am talking about players, their characters may be annoying, but when you get a player of a particular type then there tends to be a theme running through all of his/her characters. We may not have them in our games but we certainly learn to spot them at conventions. And to start the ball rolling: #1: The stranger in a strange land. You set up your next game in advance: "We will be playing an Oriental Adventures campaign in the Rokugan setting. All PCs will be members of Phoenix clan or an allied family. 32 Point buy." And the "stranger" shows up with: A Bard. A bard???? The class does not exist in this setting. We are doing OA specifically for a change of pace. Why play a bard? How about a geisha? At least then you won't be a gaijin in an area very intollerant of them. The DM rolls his eyes. Nope, nothing will do but a Bard, or maybe a Druid, or a Paladin specifically because the source book says they don't exist in this campaign. Nothing will do for the stranger in a strange land except to play an outsider, a rules-bender, an oddball who winds up the center of attention. In fact, if a given setting features all base classes and PrCs except for one, then that is all he will be happy to play. And in your next game, when you move back to a traditional western setting are you surprised when he shows up with a Sohei?
AntiDjinn 01-03-04, 02:31 AM	#2 The genre jumper. Similar to the stranger in a strange land, except this guy can't even stay in the same game system. You tell the group: "For the starting game cycle we will be playing in Atlantis some 2000 years before the deluge. Early steam age. Standard D&D with some steam punk elements." The genre jumper brings his Jedi. Nevermind they don't exist in the game, he will make one by whatever means possible. Later you start a horror game in the Ravenloft setting (gothic/victorian for those unfamiliar with it). You tell them it will feature a grim tone with full effects of the demiplane of Dread applied. He shows up with Wolverine (except it talks like Eric Cartman).
Mithose 01-03-04, 02:54 AM	The Bookie They'v been playing for awhile, and they know all the rules but still they just cant help but look up the most usless things "oh I didnt know you can pull out a spell component while in a grappel" "magic missile does 1d4??" "druids a class???"
hivemind[MVGC] 01-03-04, 02:54 AM	#3 All my characters are really me. This player couldn't come up with an original personality or mannerisms if his life depended on it. All of his characters use the same turns of phrase as he does in real life, act like he does - even like the same things. Has no concept of role-playing.
Oberon_of_Avalon 01-03-04, 03:44 AM	#4 The silent type This character will play a quiet, usually rogue or mercenary type character. He will insist on never speaking, except when it would be cool or dramatic to do so. FOR THE LOVE OF PELOR, SPEAK! It's not going to hurt you to share your thoughts with the party. This might've been cool the first game or two, but when EVERY character, even the kender you played in the Dragonlance game, was a loner silent type, it gets old quick!
Ssussunriyh 01-03-04, 05:35 AM	#5: The Overdone Stereotype This is the guy who picks a traditional character image and takes it to extremes. Every half-orc and/or barbarian is as dumb as a box of rocks, and isn't housebroken either. Every dwarf is a grouchy drunk who starts a brawl in every tavern he passes, "just because." Every half-elf whines incessantly about his painful and traumatic childhood because he was snubbed and ostracised by the purebloods. Every necromancer shrouds himself in black robes, aspires to become a lich, and schemes to create an army of undead minions. Every gnome is an absent-minded alchemist who blows things up right and left. Every elf is insufferably arrogant and sneers at anyone or anything non-elven.
farscry 01-03-04, 05:35 AM	#6 - The Negotiator This player will always try to negotiate for a better deal, or to get out of a tight situation, or to get more allies/money/beer, regardless of the character type they're playing. Dwarven Barbarian raised by orcs? Well, this one understands the value of compromise and will not take the bait when someone attempts to goad them into rage. They only rage when tactically viable. Elven Ranger with goblins as a favored enemy? Well, when the party catches up with the band of goblins that just had baby elven omelettes for breakfast, the ranger will still try to cow the goblins into becoming his servants. This is the type of player who will have a Lawful Good paladin who consorts with thieves if it will get him a better deal/situation. Drives me nuts.
Geek 01-03-04, 06:14 AM	a variant on the "all my characters are me": #7: All my characters are who I would like to be " Like a player that always plays an elven Fighter Mage, even if the setting doesn't support those (like WoD or Starwars...) The fun in roleplaying is (mostly) pretending someone you are not, and someone how is cool too (and you are (probably) not). But if al you can come up with is the same stereotype than either you are out of Imagination or you're to hard trying to be something that you just CAN'T be. Geek PS NjutNjut
Polymorph 01-03-04, 07:25 AM	#7 - The Supertalkactive PC ... is the one character that always talks. He does not mind his bad Charisma score and his lack of diplomacy skill. He may not be elected as partyleader by the others, but he does not stop acting up as if he was. Telling everyone what to do in combatsituations ooc definitly annoys all other players.
der_gogo 01-03-04, 08:59 AM	# 9 (since there are 2 #7) - The Rules Lawyer "Hey, GM, your NPC can't cast this spell, I observed that his caster lvl can't be as high as that!" "GM, I get a save on this spell!" "But on page 186 it says that the spell has only a reach of...!" "Okay, guys, no problem a balor has exactly XXX HP, an AC of YY and Attack Bonus of ZZZZ. The fighter hits him on a 5 or more, and he will fail my spell 35% of the time..." "I have to look that up. I think the rules work differently!" And he is doing that all the time, especially in situations where you try to create some emotions in your campaognn. Sometimes even if he can't have appropriate information, like NPCs having new Spells, Scrolls, Feats, Surprises.... # 10 - The cowardly Whiner "Oh, no, we will all DIE!!! The monsters will kill us all!!!!" "I run away!" This player usually plays a spellcasting class and has at least 3 different means of escape prepared. While his party members get slaughtered, he always gets away somehow. He won't have the courage to face the boss. His Character could die. If he dies he will mourn all session that you are a bad GM and that he wants another one. He will also say that his char is weaker than all other classes and he never got useful items and... # 11 - The Jokster Everything someone does reminds him on a movie scene, something he has seen in a computer game, or in RL. And he wants to share that with the group. But he does that every 5 minutes. He is too busy telling everybody about funny things that happened to his Everquest char that he forgets playing his Character. He pulls old jokes by acting stupid with his chars, using out of character knowledge, like letting them quote stuff out of movies etc.
The Master Weaver Is Warped 01-03-04, 09:29 AM	#12 What should I do? This player is constantly showing me his spell list and asking me what he should do next. Damn it, play your own character. #13 Wait, wait, you should do this... This player is constantly telling me what my character should do in the situation. Damn it, let me play my own character. #14 What should I do? AND Wait, wait, you should do this... Where's my :censored: dagger? Forget playing your character, mine is going to kill it now.
Salla 01-03-04, 09:29 AM	The Center Of Attention This is the guy who insists on having his character be a part of everything, even when it's obvious that he has no reason being a part of it, much less the focus. For example, a low-charisma, no Diplomacy Fighter consistently piping up during the high Diplomacy character's interactions (usually causing more harm than good). I've seen one of these so bad that, when the party split up to take care of personal business, somehow he managed to be there with *everybody*, in four different places, giving advice and orders. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Mr. Subtle As the DM, you barely start the description of someone or something before Mr. Subtle starts making an attempt at killing it, breaking it, or ticking it off. His idea of tactics is deciding between Fireball and Lightning Bolt. If you put him in a situation where killing it, breaking it, or ticking it off aren't options, he becomes completely uninterested in the game and wanders off. When other characters attempt subtle solutions to problems, he horns in and ruins them. I once had someone do this, even going so far as to say, "I'm going to go play video games, call me when the fight starts."
AntiDjinn 01-03-04, 10:30 AM	#17 Hello Kitty She plays D&D for the rainbows, unicorns, and baby dragons. Ask to see a sample of her handwriting: She dots her "I's" with little hearts. Generally a fairly motivated role player, but for some reason Hello Kitties never seem to learn the mechanics of the game. Not likely to wade in an hack away at the monsters unless you first have those monsters stomp something cute. Sometimes doodles stars and rainbows when she is supposed to be mapping or at least paying attention to the ongoing melee.
AntiDjinn 01-03-04, 10:42 AM	#18 The Pet-O-Phile Often a subset of the Hello Kitty, the pet-o-phile wants animals and other beasties for pets. All of them. She generally plays a Druid, but even when she is a Monk she will have a menagerie of animals. Her characters usually look like a cross between the beastmaster and Elmira of the Tiny Toons. When the rest of the party has a moral quandry about what to do with those baby hobgoblins, she adopts them. Baby dragons, winged cats, blink dogs -- don't leave these lying about or she will try to make pets of them too. To make matters worse, her pets rarely prove useful to the party since they generally need to be rescued from peril frequently. She may even adopt monsters that other party members find odious (Fighter: "you are not seriously bringing that rust monster along??) but for the most part will stick to things that are cute. Most pet-o-philes will bring every single one of their animals to every single room of every dungeon and make big deal out of keeping track of them. If you have ever had a game delayed because someone could not figure out what to do with their Llama or giraffe and would not enter the dungeon without them then you have a pet-o-phile in your game.
Leagle 01-03-04, 11:16 AM	The Human (elf) Humans with stat bonuses, pointy ears and weapon proficiencies. Grr.. Much worse than #5 if you ask me. No.20 The anti-stereotype. Plays the 1/2 orc paladin, goes against every stereotype with more than a faintly annoying vehemance. "Why must 1/2 orcs be considered stupid. You haven't seen the 1/2 orc wizard, the dwarven druid and the sun elf barbarian yet.
Avalongod 01-03-04, 11:37 AM	I have two: 1.) People who try to solve OOC conflict IC. By this I mean two players who don't get along, their characters always trying to PK each other. They could both roll up LG elven archers and before the party has "left the tavern" they have found something to duel to the death over. Naturally once one character is PKed, the conflict returns to OOC and the yelling/fighting/crying starts. I only saw this happen once, but left a lasting impression. 2.) Former DMs who, as players, think they're still the DM.
ElFenrir 01-03-04, 12:05 PM	I think we are on 23: Going with the anti-stereotype(which can be good if played well), the player that must play THE most different character possible; even if said character would just NOT work. Example: In a Shadowrun campaign I was going to play in, one of the players was going to play a paraplegic african prince in a wheelchair. I'm not kidding. A character who is STILL nobility and for some reason is now shadowrunning in Seattle. I mean, sure he'd have some negotiation skills and such...but no decker, no rigger concept...just...a prince in a wheelchair. 24: "My character, Thorin the Dwarven Axe fighter died. Here is my new guy, Thorim the Dwarven Sword Fighter." Aka the player that will just make an ever so slight variant of a character if their old one dies. Their human wizard's wizard brother, with the same character traits and skills(his twin), takes his place. The elven barbarian just happened to have a best friend who acts just like him who wants to avenge his death. I mean, I don't see the problem with making a relative who might want to avenge the other character, but please give them their own personality, and a different class! 25. I am suprised no one mentioned "I managed to tweak my fighter/mage/rogue/cleric to be the best at everything. It took me a week to balance his stats and feats, and after some calculations with my engineering calculator, he deals an average of 10.5 points of damage per round at 1st level, without crits. He has a roughly 25% chance of critting, thus letting him deal 31.3 points, which again, is the average. This is about 50% of the time, but otherwise, he has a shot...." you see what I mean.
Henchcritter 01-03-04, 12:33 PM	26. No responsibility for his character's actions. GM: you track the BBEG to a tavern. Player: I set it on fire. GM: Ok. You start a fire, you here a lot of screams inside. Pl: good, does the BBEG come running out. GM: No Pl: I keep waiting. GM: People start making fire lines and passing buckets. You hear screams inside from dying people. Pl: That will ruin my plan, I draw my sword and stop them. GM: The people spread out, the fire is getting bigger. Pl: Good, no BBEG. GM: No, you didn't check if he's inside. But there is a force of 20 guards aproaching. A woman points a finger at you and yells: "there is the arsonist". Pl: Twenty guards against my first level fighter, that's no fair. You're a killer GM! 27. The goodguy. GM: Your paladin walks when me sees a boy that looks malnourished, he has barely any flesh on his bones. The boy runs away from the baker’s. The baker runs after him yelling: "hold that thief". Pl: I draw my sword and kill this vile evildoer.
Northen_Spur 01-03-04, 01:07 PM	28. Template opportunist The Pc who makes sure he get's bitten by the werewolf, so he will become one. Never tries to find a cure for lycanthropy and is willing to argue for hours that with the new advancement rules the were-wolf is balanced I usualy Rule-0, you have 48 hours to find a cure or your Pc becomes a chaotic evil were-wolf Npc 29: Race blender "Why can't I have My Half-Dragon 1/4 Beholder 1/4 Human? I've done a terrific backstory on him!" "First of all, how would such a creature mate?" "Uhmmm...." "I thought so..." "Uhmmm, Wait... a wizard experiment gone wrong! Yeah that's it!" "Good grief!"
Avalongod 01-03-04, 01:09 PM	Can't believe I forgot this one: 28.) Players who are obviously sex offenders in real life. Once when I was first playing D&D (age 12, 20 years ago) a friend and I played with a DM who was slightly older (about 13). We decided to play an "evil" campaign, and the DM rolled up an NPC and we went through "The Keep on the Borderlands". There was one point where we killed some orcs, including some females. The DM proceded to have his NPC carve out their :censored::censored::censored::censored: :censored::censored:s and drink their blood from them like a flagon. Now, I understand that this is an evil campaign, but even at 12 years old I was like WTF?!!! :mymy: I never played with that dood again, although we had some mutual associates so I heard about him from time to time. Surprise, surprise, about 10 years later he was charged with raping a woman (I'm not sure if he was convicted or acquited). Fortunately that was the only personal run in I had with a player (actually DM in this case) with some issues . But I have heard stories about a couple of others. I once heard about some dude who got in a fight with an elven wizard in a sacred Elven wood. After beating the wizard this guy (who I think was playing a good character) proceded to anally rape the wizard's corpse in order to "defile" the sacred wood (no pun intended here). :looloo: Apparently the player went into some detail in this regard. Needless to say he sufficiently creeped out the other players and group (I think it was his first time playing) that he was not invited back. And once on these very boards I saw someone mention a player who rolled up a middle-aged pedophile bard. If that's the sort of character you like to roll up, its not time yet for you to stop taking those Depo-Provera injections. Joke character you say? Not funny. :thumbsdown:
Avalongod 01-03-04, 01:12 PM	Oops...simultaneous post...mine should have been 30.)
Tranq 01-03-04, 01:15 PM	31) refuses to roleplay conversations properly: Me: (in character as npc) "so, what have you found out?" Player "ok, so i tell the guy whats going on" Me: "go on then" Player "no there's too much, and i'll miss some" Me: (in character as npc) *cough* "so, what have you found out?" Player: "I tell the guy whats going on" ...
Luminous Crayon 01-03-04, 01:32 PM	32.) The engineer. None of the existing classes in any core book or suppliment are adequate to portray this player's character concept, so he makes his own class and insists on using it. Despite the fact that it give +2 BAB per level, four good saves, full spellcasting progression, and a d20 hit die, he insists that it's absolutely balanced.
Winternova 01-03-04, 01:45 PM	Oh, i hate no. 31 - a good half of my players are like that, that and 'i walk up to him and hit the X button - what does he say?' 33 - Chaotic Stupid - this character is known to say things like 'Chaotic Neutral is my favorite alignment cos it means i can do anything!' They're known to do incredibly stupid things for their own enjoyment, even while it may doom the party - especially while it may doom the party. 34 - the weakling - this character had all intentions of being the smart one, the thinker, the tinkerer, the inventor, and so forth. After the first combat of the game, the weakling arms himself for war, and sets his sights on out-damaging the group's main fighters. He fails time and time again, and quickly becomes fed up with his character because he 'can't do anything'. 35 - The Specialist - he was built for one thing, and one thing only, and whatever that is is the only thing he does. A fighter that works mercilessly to slay the undead will take a seat when an orphanage is set alight by a living ne'erdowell. Should a damsel in distress request his assistance, he'll refuse unless the undead is after her. Should another one of the PCs in his travelling party request help in rescuing his long lost brother, too bad - cos what would the undead want with his brother? 36 - Ignorance of the law is no excuse - "What do you mean i add my strength to hit? I've never done that before - do i add it to my crossbow too?" For some reason, this player just cannot grasp the rules. During character creation, you bombarded this character with all the little tidbits you know, you've had him read the book, and you've held his hand during character creation, but... "Do i add my wisdom to initiative?" "Okay, so, i'm trying to get under my save?" Don't get me wrong - he loves to play, and has fun, but... AUGH!
Vaarkheef 01-03-04, 01:49 PM	37. The DM's girlfriend Often an intense roleplayer, doesn't really know a thing about game mechanics even after having played for three years (wait, I add my base attack bonus to damage or not?). If somebody dares to say an OOG comment, you can hear her say "Hey guys I was just roleplaying here, thanks for ruining it... where was I?". She's the first one to talk in about any NPC encounter the players get, and the first to go check her emails when players enter "combat mode" (aka "roll for initiative"). She can also have some traits of the Hello Kitty player type. 38. The DM's PC Sometimes DMs want to play something so bad that they don't get enough of roleplaying NPCs, they just HAVE to get a PCish NPC; one that would stay with the PCs during the whole campaign. Of course, he's twice the character levels of the rest of the party and PRAISE THE LORD he was there to save them from those beholders when they were all level 2. The DM's PC knows everything, is surprised when PCs "don't know what to do next" and thinks all the PCs are damn idiots for "having pulled on that chain, back in the dungeon". Unless some very talented and high-level rogue is in the party, the DM's PC will stay around as long as the DM will enjoy playing it.
The Stray 01-03-04, 02:15 PM	I think we need to give all these people Aurturik Shovel awards...them AND: 39: The Merry Prankster This is the fellow who, while he might be a decent roleplayer, CANNOT SHUT UP with the jokes. He's the reason it takes you nearly an hour to actually start playing, and he likes to crack jokes at inappropriate times IG. DM: So you're stalking the mystically warped sewers, where a strange mist has formed. It continually whispers vile things in a dark tounge, and the faces of damned and tortured souls continually form and dissolve within. PC1: I pull my cloak tighter and draw my ghost-touch scimitars. PC2: I give a small prayer to my goddss that we will live to see he light of day again. The Merry Prankster: Hey, that's some strong poo-gas formed up in here! DM (annoyed): Yes, and out of the mist strides and angry troll with a shovel. TMP: A shovel, huh? Hey, I can dig it! Hey, where are you gonna shov.... *WHAM!* *dig dig dig*
Aristocracy 01-03-04, 02:44 PM	40) I think this one goes without saying, but I'll add it. Powergaming is a problem for most people anyway, so I'll add it with a twist. THE POWERGAMER WITH ISSUES This character is a ridiculously strong über-fighter (particularly with relation to the group). He does loads of damage. But get him into an encounter with a spellcaster and he's suddenly "unfairly targeted" by the DM (despite the fact that he is obviously the strongest character in the party - he's a half-dragon, for Pete's sake!) in the form of NPCs. Whenever he gets Hold Person or Bestow Curse cast on him, it's the DM taking advantage of his low Will save. He also has a habit of falling on the body of an enemy when it falls in order to get all the items (after one encounter in which he was thwarted from doing so by the Wizard utilizing Expeditious Retreat). THE WORLD REVOLVES AROUND ME I have a tendency to play this way. This kind of player wants to be involved in anything and everything going on, always in the spotlight. However, this character isn't necessarily out of place as the Center of Attention might. This type of player tends to aggravate other players because they tend to take all the glory. (I also tend towards number 7, 12, and 15.)
Aristocracy 01-03-04, 02:44 PM	Argh, double post.
Oberon_of_Avalon 01-03-04, 02:48 PM	41 - The Master of the Shy Turtle Way Somewhat similar to The Cowardly Whiner, this player is constantly afraid that his PC will get hurt or die. 20th-level fighter in +5 full plate that generates a constant magic circle against evil with a +5 evil outsider bane bastard sword of speed will shy away from a dretch because it might roll three 20s in a row and instantly kill him. This player will, whenever possible, employ ranged weapons even when effectively useless. His Dexterity of 12 doesn't help much, especially because he needs one or two more points on a roll of 19 to even hit the enemy's AC. The gods forbid that he get raised if he dies. Maybe some assassins sneaking up from the back will teach him a lesson next time...*grumblegrumble*
Tranq 01-03-04, 03:15 PM	42. but, but it says this in the book... refuses to accept that in your game some things (like acceptable character names, available weapons etc.) can vary from the PHB. I'm in a game where the DM has very specific rules for halfling name, they're all 3 syllabuls (sp?) with a double letter in the middle. but our 42. halfling player is called Milo, cos it's in the book...
The_EvilDungeon_Master 01-03-04, 03:52 PM	I'm surprised no one put... 43. THE MUNCHKIN This is the guy that everyone hates, and wants to be at the same time. (S)He constantly argues with the DM on how things work, as well as constantly tries to get the DM to let them use outrageous things. These tend to be the same people who use strategy guides for every game. If you know someone like this, please contact the nearest adult or experienced gamer immediately.
Dasein 01-03-04, 04:19 PM	44. The anti-power gamer Insists on playing an intentionally weak character - a wizard with an intelligence of 7, or a parapalegic monk or something equally difficult to play- and then gets upset when the DM and other players do not cater to his weakness. This player may also criticise other characters for being too powerful. 45. The psychiatric case Similar to 44, but instead of ability problems, the player gives his character all sorts of weird personality issues. Extreme phobias, alternate personalities, superhero complexes (in a non-superhero game), and any other psychological problem you can think of make these characters almost impossible to work with. Again, these players tend to want the game to focus around their character, and get upset when the party based around subtlty and stealth wants nothing to do with their character who insists on dressing up in a green and gold costume, and annoncing that 'The Green Flash' is here to save the day. 46. Intentionally divisive players Create characters that will not get along with the rest of the party. If the rest of the party is good, creates an evil or neutral (but really evil) character. Plays a half-orc in a party of elves, where the eleves have been at war with the orcs and half-orcs for centuries and the races despise eachother. Dasein
Luminous Crayon 01-03-04, 04:24 PM	47. The pyromaniac. The player that always "accidentally" burns the inn down before leaving town. Bonus Annoyance points if the player in question is playing a sorceror or invoker. Bonus Annoyance points if the player in question can't understand why the DM is warning him about alignment shifts toward Chaotic and/or Evil.
Leagle 01-03-04, 04:48 PM	No.48 The cheater. A powergaming munchkin, who whines for extra stuff, tricks the dm into giving him things, and whose sun-elf evoker with spellcasting prodigy and the thayan spells always gets a 24 on initiative. No.49 The mad bastard -problems relating actions to the game world. A powergaming munchkin, who whines for extra stuff, tricks the dm into giving him things. Extrra points for being like No.s 33 and 36, he is chaotic evil/neutral/insane, and fails to place his char properly in the game world. When faced with events, he invariably does something wholly inappropriate, such as thunderstoning the crowd to catch a theif, breaking and entering the house opposite from the place the defeated enemy just landed, robbing it, "for the good of the party" and getting his friends into trouble. When charged in court for attempting to rob the magic store, attempting to murder passers by and beating up the goodly monk who investigates, and inciting (the party barb) others into attacking said monk, he boldly claims it was not his greed that led him. He then attempts to have himself hanged (he is a foreign agent) by claiming his country sent him to do it, so it's ok. :rofl: Lucky his defence screamed at him, and struck a deal behind his back to have him branded with a mark of justice. "Don't be gentle with him." [edit] And the best bit, is he then throws a tantrum and tries to roll up another char. Because he can no longer disrupt the game.
Decepticons 01-03-04, 05:03 PM	48. The Weapon Master: With all the D20 publications that exist, this person still can't find a weapon they like. Instead, they HAVE to make one up. Of course, the weapon they create is a simple or martial weapon, and wont require an exotic weapon feat. Player: Okay, so it's a 10' spiked chain, which does 1d6 damage and gives me a trip attack, and at one end is a flail head, which I can use with a 10' range, and does flail damage plus a trip. On the other end is a 4' metal tube which does 1d4 damage and a trip, but if I push a button on the handle, a sword blade pops out of the tube and does 1d8 damage + 1d4 bludgeon damage, plus a trip. It's a simple weapon, with a 17-20 crit range and x3 crit bonus. Where my character is from, all people are trained with this weapon from age 2, so I automatically get weapon finess and improved critical at level 1. Okay? Me: No. Player: Okay, how about if I replace the flail end with a mace? ---------------------------------------------------- 49. Impossible role-playing A catch all for several things I've already seen posted...this person insists on role-playing something they really can't role play. The Yale graduate trying to role play a 7 Int Paladin. Instead of seeming slow, this character just ends up being a really smart guy who sometimes does really dumb things.
Melsia 01-03-04, 06:15 PM	# 50 The player tries to create a mystic character allowing him to go away from the group to make "super cool" moves that wouldn't be noticed by other characters 'cause he's away from the party. He never talks and has problems about revealing his real name and even a nickname so other players must call him by " hey you the dark elf " (example) and other stupid things like that. The player creates a so called "wonderful" background for his character but he's not able to reveal some part of it. He also tries to center the game on his personnal quests from his background and ruins the game at the end by doin' something that fits only with his "mysterious" character. :b: Please shoot 'em all !!!
The_EvilDungeon_Master 01-03-04, 06:28 PM	51. The "You should do this" player This is the person who always tries to give you advice on how to DM, no matter what you do or how good you are. "You should send THIS to fight us" "No no, THIS is how you should cast spells!" "That's all wrong! I'll show you MY way of doing it" Ever have someone like this? tell them "Oh no, allow me to show you my way" and then proceed to kill them in whatever way you see fit.
manneedshaircut 01-03-04, 07:05 PM	#52: "But noone was supposed to know about it!" The player who refuses to give the GM part of his backstory/his chars god/chars real name, because "Noone can know about it, its a secret!" Gm'd for one of these once, had to give him a nice talking to when i noticed that his chaotic neutrasl character actually worshiped Erythnul....:nonono:
Dasein 01-03-04, 07:15 PM	53. Metagamers A common problem, but one no one has mentioned yet. While I think most people metagame a bit now and then, the ones to watch out for are the ones who out and out cheat. They'll read the modules you're running, memorize the stats for everything and so on. Give 'em the boot. 54. Clones Directly model their characters off famous characters from the game universe or fantasy in general. Drizzt is a common one, as are Aragorn and Legolas from LotR. While having a character concept influenced by famous characters is fine, clones tend to get annoying and disruptive. Dasein
Till Danderfluff 01-03-04, 09:07 PM	#55 The Predictable Class Player This guy will always play the same type of character over and over and over and over again. Doesn't ever seem to get bored of it either. I used to have a guy like this. If we started a low level game it was always Half-Elf Rogue. If it was a high-level game it was always Half-elf Sorc Dragon Disciple, (he never wanted to actully EARN the Dragon Disciple's abilities. He just wanted them.) In D20 Modern he was always a militaristic rich kid. In Spycraft always a D2 Soldier who was an ex-Navy Seal. #56 The Dimwit This guy can always be counted on to do something that will for sure screw the rest of party royally. He doesn't even do it on purpose, he thinks of something that would be cool (at least in his mind) but ALWAYS turns out bad. I have one of these aas well. (Sorry Nick.)
Bloodtide_the_Red 01-03-04, 09:31 PM	#57-The over equiped character-- The guy who can't just carry 50 feet of rope, he has to bring 300'. Not just 10 torches, he wants 100. This goes for money too, carring like 10,000 coins in a backpack. And goes along with #58 The 'Must have all my Stuff used back' He is typical overloaded like the above, but has to keep the exact same number of things he started the adventure with. This is the guy running after every shot arrow or thrown dagger. And always takes the time to pick up stuff, even when it's not such a good idea (DM 'the room starts to fill with smoke' Other players 'we get outside' Stuff guy 'I grab my torch, metal spike, rope and then follow them. This guy can go as far as to scrape up used dust or chalk. BT
Ssussunriyh 01-03-04, 10:32 PM	59. The player who thinks with his :censored: This is the guy who always seems to be cruisin' for female NPCs to do the nasty with, no matter what the circumstances. DM: "You're walking through the forest, when an arrow comes out of nowhere and sticks in the ground right in front of you. Several wood elves emerge from their hiding places, all aiming their bows at you. They do NOT look friendly." PC: "Any of 'em hot lookin' babes? If so, I start flirting with her!" DM: "The leader is female. She says 'You are tresspassing here. We cannot permit you to go any further. Turn back now.'" PC: "Aw, c'mon babe! I'll make it worth your while..." (suggestive wink) DM: :mad: "She has you stripped and hogtied, then castrates you." PC: "Ooohhh, kinky!" DM: :headexplo
The Axeman 01-03-04, 11:48 PM	#60. The Dr. Spock Master of Logic This is the player that does not understand the concept of "fantasy". Constantly tells the DM and group: "That couldn't happen this way because the laws of thermodynamics state that blah blah blah blah blah...." While everyone reaches for the 2 liter Mountain Dew to silence him. #61. The Misguided Mega Drama Queen/King This is the player that thinks he knows more about the campaign than the DM does, and believes that every person he encounters is somehow related to the campaign and knows exactly what is going on. He demonstrates this by being as dramatic as possible about the wrong subject, to the wrong person. PC meets a captain of the watch in the street. PC: MUAHAH I HAVE THE HOLY CIRCLET OF UBMER MERCY!! Your king will be very pleased that I have slayed the evil (insert obscure monster or villian here) and saved the unbeknowenst peasants from a terrible death at his/it's hands. Captain: WTF did you just say?
ElFenrir 01-04-04, 12:36 AM	Another one in the vein of "Anti Power Gamer": 61. "Anyone who plays a combat class is a bad roleplayer." These people will play characters that they don't try to make weak(like a int 7 wizard), but they tend to play either diviners, enchanters, non combative 'thinking' clerics, etc., ALL THE TIME. When someone wants to play a fighter, barbarian, war cleric, or any character with over a 12 Str or Con, etc, even if they aren't twinked and have genuinely good backgrounds and personalities; the aformentioned played will accuse them of 'just wanting to make a powerful combat character who doesn't want to roleplay."
The_EvilDungeon_Master 01-04-04, 01:04 AM	62: "Simple simple" This is the player who in every battle situation says something along the lines of "I attack the guy *Roll roll* does (Insert number here) hit? Cool, I do (Blah blah) damage" every time it's their turn. 63: "HasToDoEveryThingReallyFast" gamer This guy is the one always saying something like "Ok, I run behind him, sneak attack, then when he turns around, I run behind him AGAIN and sneak attack, then with the rest of my turn I climb the walls and jump on him!" He (or she) tries to do everything they can in one round. 64: "It's called a SWORD you know" This is the guy who never fights the traditional way. He is the exact opposite of "I hit him". When it's this gamer's turn, he will never use his weapon and instead do something like "I Jump on him from above!" or "I start throwing useless items from my pack at it."
Bloodtide_the_Red 01-04-04, 01:50 AM	#65 the disorginazied player They have very poor character sheets, in pencil, pen and crayon. They don't follow any kind of order, just have stuff scribled all over the page. #66 The Overorginazied player they have several pages for their character, foldes and index cards for every spell, ability, item, animal companion, ect. however it just comes out of the bookbag as a huge jumble of paper. #67 The Food Clutz This player just 'somehow' spils, dumps, drops or otherwise gets food or drink on everything..all the time. They have the bad habit of doing it while looking over someone else book or paper. BT
The_EvilDungeon_Master 01-04-04, 01:55 AM	66: "Oh well that character died, Now let me show you this NEW one!" This is the guy who makes really cool characters... then gets bored of them within the hour. He will most likely commit suicide and then just *happen* to have a spare character ready! Imagine the chances of that!
Kojiro James 01-04-04, 02:05 AM	#67: The lesbian fan The guy who always fantasizes about lesbians and so his characters are lesbians, etc. etc.
The_EvilDungeon_Master 01-04-04, 02:08 AM	68: The wannabe This is the person who tries to act like someone he thinks is cool. Ever seen someone come trying to be Legolas? Personally, I'd rather be the dwarf. :angel:
BlaineTog 01-04-04, 02:32 AM	:rofl: I am most definatelly guilty of #57-58, 66, and my ENTIER PARTY was guilty og Evil DM's 66. Not me of course (although I *do* have *counts* 7 back-up characters, all with 3-10 page backstories. OK, some of them arn't down on paper yet, but I'm gettin' there.). :D 69 (no jokes, please): The Dismemberer This player absolutley MUST have every tooth, ear, hand, head, etc of every exotic enemy ever faced (and, sometimes, even just the normal races too). "DM: The Mindflayer/Demon/Donkey falls over dead. Dismemberer: I cut off it's tentacles/horns/teeth/etc. and put them in my pack. When we get back to town, I'm gonna have them made into a Cloak. DM/other PCs: http://majik.be/smilies/shocked.gifhttp://majik.be/smilies/freakedout.gifhttp://majik.be/smilies/scared.gif
AntiDjinn 01-04-04, 02:32 AM	Arrrggg beaten to the 69 spot. Errr uhm, not that it matters.
BlaineTog 01-04-04, 02:37 AM	Ha! 2 late!
AntiDjinn 01-04-04, 02:37 AM	#70 The "Time Out" summoner. This one plays a spell caster and whenever he needs a beastie (Summon Monster, Summon Nature's Ally, or whatever) all action grinds to a halt. You could be in the middle of a pitched battle and you call out his initiative and he says: "I cast Summon Monster VII and summon..... hang on....." as he pulls out the Monster Manual. The rest of the group might as well go out for pizza as he reads the entry for each monster he can summon (including multiples of lower level monsters). He won't decide in a single round; as far as he is concerned the game is in stasis while he chooses the perfect monster. Generally a slow reader just to make matters worse.
AntiDjinn 01-04-04, 02:49 AM	#71 Mr. Fuzzy Dice I won't say outright cheater (that would be a player to eject, not one to watch out for). For lets just say he has some odd dice conventions. When combat looks immenent he drops a d20; if it is a good roll he calls out: "Ha! got a 23 initiative!" If it is a bad roll he ignores it like he was just dropping the dice for no reason and waits for you to call for initiative rolls. His stated convention may be that if a dice lands cocked he rerolls. If the roll happens to be a natural 20 he conveniently ignores this convention (pretending not to notice it is slanted off one of his books). If he is really a looser: When rolling percentile dice he always seems to read them in the most favorable way: "It is a 91, yeah I always read the red dice first -- red for blood!" "Yes! I got a 93! What? Of course I always read the black dice first -- black for death."
The_Dark_One 01-04-04, 02:56 AM	#72: The Loose Canon: This guy does what he wants, when he wants. He constantly ignores the party leader/vote and does his own thing. Resents being told what to do and sometimes actual force is required to rein him in (I do this sometimes:D ).
AntiDjinn 01-04-04, 03:05 AM	#73 The woefully hygienically-challenged. I am definitely not talking about the characters here. There are players out there (more common at Cons for some reason, I have no idea what most of these people must do for a living in the real world) who seem to have a pathologic aversion to soap, deoderant, toothpaste, mouthwash, toilet paper, shampoo, laundry detergent, and other basic toiletries and cleaning supplies. Usually it is just one specific hygienic omission (like the breath that can peel paint) but sometimes the person just seems to have no sense of smell. We actually dismissed someone from our game for this. We are not proud of this fact, but the situation had gotten pretty dire. It was a very small gaming room, there was no AC, and people were trying to eat and drink.
The_EvilDungeon_Master 01-04-04, 03:09 AM	74: "But my LAST DM let me!" This guy will try to pull anything off with the infamous "My previous DM didn't do that." "My last Dungeon Master let me do this!" "My Last dungeon master thought you were unfair, so he modified my character! Rules from the DM! You can't change rules from the DM!" (True story) This can usually be solved with "Yes, well I KILLED your previous DM, chopped him into tiny bits, and force fed him to you while you slept" Then slap them upside the back of their head. (Note: To some people this method seems a bit much)
BlaineTog 01-04-04, 03:14 AM	Nonsense! Killing/Force-feading people to other people is perfectly acceptable when one of the people involved is annoying. ;)
windquake 01-04-04, 03:22 AM	Related to ones before: #75) The Way out of place player. This player HAS to have a character that is so unique you have to deny him that character and so he decides not to play at all. A friend of mine had to create a character that no one knew if it was a male or female. It was going to be bisexual and flirt with everyone. At first I resisted, but then I figured it would interesting and allow it. Then he came up with this gem. Him: "I want a personal assitant to follow me." Me: "Why? Him: "To brush my hair, announce my arrival, stuff like that." Me: "That seems okay, but what about when you are not in towns and are out in the wilderness?" Him: "Then too." Me: "Okay, what about combat. This little no body won't hang around when the swarm of dragons is buzzing around." Him: "He could hide behind me." Me: "No. I can accept you having an assistant, but they would NOT hang around in the middle of a battle, they would run. Now if you wanted to leave the assistant in town, or hire a new one when the old ones run away that would be fine." Him: "Nah, never mind." #76: The microscopic situation guy I don't know how else to explain this one. Same player as above, in the middle of a battle, tells me he is going to hide behind one of the fallen dead bodies. (Keep in mind he was elf, the dead body was a kobold or goblin.) And when one of the enemies went on to fire an arrow at him, he wanted to claim a bonus from the dead body. I didn't allow it because the body was just destroyed by the barbarian with a great axe. So he got angry. Then, when the party decided to run, they fled and the mage cast "Rope Trick" and they all climbed up the rope pulled it up, but he want to lean out of the space and shoot arrows out of it, and then claim 90% cover because only his hands were outside of the space. grrrr!
meabolex 01-04-04, 03:31 AM	77. "My character would never stand for this. I cut my throat." This example happens when players who tend to be chaotic regardless of the class play a chaotic neutral alignment (IE I'm totally insane). I had to remove all of one player's strength (via shadow's damage using the shadowdancer) simply so he wouldn't kill himself. 78. "I lie down in the middle of the road." This is just annoying. This character sends a message to the DM saying, "hey, I want to :censored: with you since I'm unhappy with your adventure." So, the character does disruptive behavior like sitting down in the middle of the road and refusing to go anywhere. I could throw random encounters at him, but his point is that I'm trying to railroad him. Yeah, I might be trying to push the story due to time contraints, but you can get off the choo-choo and fight level+4 CR random encounters until you move.
The_EvilDungeon_Master 01-04-04, 03:36 AM	79: "Oooh, what would happen if I... This is the gamer who is bored off his ass and will do anything just to annoy people or get a laugh. Ever had a player who constantly lit people on fire so he could eat them? (It's happened in my games, silly ranger!) Common cure: When he tries to do something weird, have it end up eating him.
windquake 01-04-04, 03:40 AM	#80: The non playing player.... This guy when combat isn't going on, unlike #79, just ignores everything else, and pulls out his latest Gameboy or magizine, cell phone (with the built in camera). Then when something that concerns his character or the entire group happens..... Me (DM): Everyone make a spot check. **everyone rolls, but Mr. Non-Playing-Player** Me: Mr. Non-Playing-Player? MNPP: (Rolls dice and reads a number at the same time saying) What's happening, whats this for?
AntiDjinn 01-04-04, 03:56 AM	#81 The History Buff This guy knows a lot about medieval history and customs and keeps throwing it out like it is somehow relevant to the game. "That isn't how they would have done that, they never would build a gatehouse like that...." "People ate XYZ back then" "Cinnamon was very rare and cost more per pound than gold" Blah Blah Blah...... Here is a newsflash for Mr History Channel: Greyhawk, Toril, Athas, etc. are not medieval Earth. Despite flavor elements that might exist in any given game world a D&D game is not set in the past of our actual Earth. In fact, it isn't in the past at all; it is the present of a world that developed with radically different metaphysical laws than our own. The world may indeed be flat, the sun may orbit the world (or may even be the living sun deity), and what you know about the history of the claymore in medieval Europe mean absolutely nothing to it. So thanks for the update on what century saw the invention of the stirrup; that will be good to know if the party ever gets planeshifted to Earth's past.
AntiDjinn 01-04-04, 04:11 AM	#82 Members of the Anti-Anachronism Society. Similar to the history buff, but without the benefit of actual knowledge; these people would not know the timeline of Earth if it were wraped around their necks. But they do have delicate gaming sensibilities and are easily jarred by anything they deem anachronistic. So have an NPC show up with gun powder and they scream "Anachronism!" Have a Frankenstein's monster show up and you will get the same cry (not so a flesh golem, go figure). Strangely, they don't have a problem with their characters chasing a group of orcs through a cornfield and then later retiring to the inn for some hot cocoa and a good smoke. Hello? corn, chocolate, and tobacco are new world crops. If they are trying to apply knowledge of medieval Europe then these items would not exist prior to the discovery of the new world. Yet no cry of anachromism there. By the way, the term refers to something out of its correct time. Since such things as wizards, shapeshifting druids, and kirins never existed in our world and are not likely to in the future they don't have a correct time and so can not be anachronistic. Things in the game only seem anachronistic to these folk because they apply their limited knowledge of when things occured on Earth to the fantasy world; a mistake both in time and cosmology.
SpyGuy 01-04-04, 05:14 AM	#83 the Anti-History Buff Similar to #82, only instead of calling foul based on limited information this bunch refuses to believe facts about our past when implemented in D&D. Example: Me: The Amadin (desert tribe) do not believe in currency. A man is only worth his usefulness to the tribe, not the sum of his trinkets and coins. #83: That's crazy talk. Me: If you wish to trade with them I suggest things they are not able to make themselves. Those items would be of great value, gold however is not. #83: Who doesn't like gold? What the :censored: kind of society doesn't use gold? Me: Ever heard of Native Americans? Or hell perhaps Africa during certain time periods? I seem to remember salt and steel being more valuable than gold to a lot of cultures! #83: I still say you're crazy.
Oberon_of_Avalon 01-04-04, 05:17 AM	#84 The Hero Before His Time This player will work some absolutely rediculous and unworkable story point into his backstory to give himself nation-spanning prestige or some such. Usually, he does this without telling the DM. "Oh, we're going to the dwarven mining city? I helped save the Thane's life by foiling a drow assassination plot. He promised to aid me whenever I'm in need, and we could sure use some +1 orc bane weapons." "Princess Laura? I saved her from the clutches of a red wyrm! That's why my sword has a dragon's tooth on the pommel, you know. Wouldn't that make me renowned as a dragonslayer?" "Of course they know me! I'm the son of the king of the elves, and they'd know their prince. Say, doesn't that give me a bonus to my Diplomacy skill?"
SpyGuy 01-04-04, 05:20 AM	One other thing, a Frankstein monster is an anachronism? Now I am no history buff but I do believe Frankenstein was a work of fiction. You actually had someone say, "No way man, Frankenstein didn't reanimate his monster of assembled corpses until the late 1800s. To have one in this setting would be asinine. We just didn't have the technology yet." Now I normally hate smiley faces, but :uh-huh:
meabolex 01-04-04, 05:44 AM	Originally posted by SpyGuy One other thing, a Frankstein monster is an anachronism? Now I am no history buff but I do believe Frankenstein was a work of fiction. At the time Mary Shelley wrote it, Frankenstein played on the fears of an age on the edge of a technological revolution. The first line of the preface reads: THE event on which this fiction is founded has been supposed, by Dr. Darwin, and some of the physiological writers of Germany, as not of impossible occurrence. Perhaps instead of a technological revolution, in D&D terms we could see an "arcane revolution" or something along that line.
SpyGuy 01-04-04, 05:55 AM	I was more shocked by the argument of time against something I know to be impossible, in any time period. It doesn't matter why the book was written, or when it was set, the events can never happen as she presented them. That was my point, that somewhere, somehow, someone was arguing that either in the 1800s existed or sometime in the future will exist the possibility that a scientist can assemble a body out of corpses and then animate it through scientific processes. I mean come on, everyone knows you can only raise a single corpse using the Herbert West method of reanimation.
Leagle 01-04-04, 10:48 AM	The inclusionist. Trys to have everything included into the game -splatbooks read or not, sourcebooks not yet released and 2nd edition rules. You know it's time to break out the holy symbols when your dm whimpers "its a skill, not a feat" when you next meet. [edit] we are now on 87.
The Master Weaver Is Warped 01-04-04, 11:30 AM	Originally posted by AntiDjinn Well, I doubt we will actually get 101 Only 14 to go. Lords, there are a lot of annoying players out there, aren't there. Woops, saw myself a couple of times. Hides face in shame.
BlaineTog 01-04-04, 01:12 PM	88. The Pack Mule This player not only owns every Core, Spalt, etc book, but also a goodly number of 3rd party sources and a number of campaighn setting books (including campaighns that you arn't playing) and will judiciously bring them to EVERY gaming session.
Dasein 01-04-04, 01:34 PM	89. Hook? What's a hook? This player will miss every plot hook, either intentionally or unintentionally, that you give him. While not necessarily a bad player, considering that adventuring is dangerous work, and most people are not up to the task of risking life and limb on a daily basis, it can make the DM's job quite difficult. If they're genuinely missing the plot hooks, either because their character really wouldn't be motivated to follow them (not everyone will be motivated by the promise of gold or glory) or they simply don't see them, then you may need to railroad them a bit by having the plot come to them. If they're intentionally refusing to adventure, then have them make a new character who is a bit more motivated. Dasein
Zil 01-04-04, 01:47 PM	90: The No-women allowed Guy: This is the guy that claims that D&D is his ‘guy time’ and will strongly object to allowing or playing with any women in the group. 91: The Classic Loves the older rule sets published in the 70’s and will often complain once the rest of the group decides to move to newer rules. He/she will typically play, but will often compare and provide his opinions and gripes about how the oldies but goodies are far superior. If a rule disagreement happens, watch out, the Classic will be quick with the “That is why I like to play 1st edition” comment. 92: One Game One Setting This is the person that will only play one type of game, and in one type of campaign setting. He/she may only play D&D in the Forgotten Realms and will not, under any circumstance, no how much the rest of the group would like to change; he/she will not budge.
Pongolyn 01-04-04, 02:02 PM	93. The Goth Now I've got no objection to goths, real or imaginary, but this guy takes the cake. He's usually a ranger or a rogue, dressed all in black that has the double effect of camouflaging him in every terrain from forest to snow and making him look tragically hip like Vampire Hunter D. He has a pet wolf no matter what his class, and since he was raised by wolves, he speaks their language. When the party pitches camp for the evening, he will go off by himself and "hunt," which means his player will sit on the couch and sulk so he doesn't have to talk to the other players. Ditto for tavern encounters. He will always walk into the unused corner of the tavern and "fade into the shadows," which of course just means he wants people to pay more attention to him.
the_fools_wildhunt 01-04-04, 02:09 PM	94: The player who thinks that he knows where the adventure is heading and sits there pulling it apart and telling the other players how exactly it is going to go. 95: What!!! I haven't seen the META-GAMER (either that or I missed it). These people must die. Damn, wish I could think of 6 more just to beat everyone to the elusive 101.
Luminous Crayon 01-04-04, 02:13 PM	Originally posted by Zil 91: The Classic Loves the older rule sets published in the 70’s and will often complain once the rest of the group decides to move to newer rules. He/she will typically play, but will often compare and provide his opinions and gripes about how the oldies but goodies are far superior. If a rule disagreement happens, watch out, the Classic will be quick with the “That is why I like to play 1st edition” comment. Several of my DnD-playing friends I met at college, including two roommates, John and AJ, who had each been playing (and in John's case, also DMing) for upwards of ten years. I never ran a game with AJ in it, but AJ and I played together in some of John's games. John runs 3.5, but AJ refuses to use anything more recent than 2nd Edition. John eventually gave up trying to cajole him into changing his character sheet to use 3rd Ed. mechanics, and just does the necessary conversions in his head, changing THAC0 to AC, and so on.
LordofChaos 01-04-04, 02:58 PM	well since this seems so succesful, and i dont actually have anything to add...why stop at 101? id add one but my players are all combinations of these ( i actually have one player who is not just 1 or 2 of these, but at least 36)
Vaarkheef 01-04-04, 03:14 PM	92. The born-leader jerk In any campaign he plays, he's the leader. Any setting, system, timeframe, he wants to be the guy everyone follows. You'll never see him play a silent monk, a shadowy rogue/ranger, a childish halfling or anything... he's the paladin, the fighter, the big tall guy who wants everyone to respect him. For some strange reason, he thinks he's justified to act in a "well if YOU don't want to help US, then you're a burden to the GROUP and I should therefore get rid of YOU since YOU'RE not willing to help US out" way. A player to watch for, as he may ruin the fun of other players by playing the game as if he was the only player; don't hesitate to punish his PCs by death if he tends to get rid of the other players' characters. 93. The "this sucks" engineer This one is REALLY annoying. In his opinion, there should be a core class for every single player in the world; prestige classes won't do, since "they suck". That guy thinks life was OH SO GOOD while 3E wasn't out and 2E was the only available option; 3E totally ruined everything. Also, according to this guy, 3E has been made so easy to learn and use that it's a system "built for kids"; 2E's complexity is just a sign it's a system adult players should use, therefore a system I as a DM should use. 3E feats? "ah, back in 2E we had weapon proficiencies, non-martial proficiency, everything was just so better". AC? "ah, back in 2E we had THAC0, which was a so much natural approach for the armor class... they ruined it in 3E". This type of player is an annoying mix of The engineer type and the Grognard type; kill on sight whenever too disturbing.
Vaarkheef 01-04-04, 03:16 PM	And may I add, let's continue this thread till 1001 or something... keep em coming guys!
Catriona 01-04-04, 03:16 PM	How about the completely and utterly un-motivated char, has that one been mentioned yet? You know, the wizard that won't come out of his tower, the halfling that just wants to stay at home and have sixteen meals a day.... *sigh* I've only ever played 3 sessions in my life so far and it wasn't even real d&d stuff, but I already encountered that one... Twice.
Tranq 01-04-04, 03:19 PM	is anyone else worried by how fast this thread grew?
The_EvilDungeon_Master 01-04-04, 03:37 PM	94: "NO!" This is the guy who gets mad at whatever you do, no matter how logical it may happen to be. If possible, just shoot him. 95: "Psst, I think we should..." This is the guy who whatever the situation, will whisper to the other party members, telling them what to do. He always has to have a say, no matter how stupid. 96: "Can I try?" This is usually the new gamer, curious about how everything works, and will constantly ask you "Can I try this? 97: Macho man This is "Ahnold, the GOVERNATOR!" type who in any battle situation, will rush forward and ram into something. 98: The spellcaster This player will commonly use up all his spells in the first battle, then whine about how spellcasters are underpowered, then he will sulk. Just shoot him. 99: The Theif This player will steal everything they possibly can, from everyone they meet "Can I pickpocket the deer?" 100: The "I'm-To-Cool-To-Talk" player This guy will never say anything. Ever. Instead he will try to act like a ninja, and slay people while they sleep. 101: "So damn cool I need my own theme music" This person is simaler to #97, except that they are so damn cool that they can succeed at everything. Hate 'em. This player makes everyone else in the group feel stupid. HOOYAH! 101!
Catriona 01-04-04, 03:45 PM	102 actually... I may be a noob, but I *did* make a contribution. :P
Neja Masachora 01-04-04, 03:45 PM	#102: The Pervert Like #59, only worse. The player is so obsessed with whether his character is having sex or not that he doesn't care at all whether the object of his affections is living or not. Also, they tend to spend most of the time just flirting with any and all female players in the group, regardless of whether they are saying such subtle things as "if you get any closer to me I'll castrate you". Very amusing when they are 1st level sorcerers with 2 hit points and no armor trying to take on obviously powerful fighters. #103 The Failed CN They believe that having a CN alignment entitles them to do anything they want. *ANYTHING* #103: Hmmm... are they commoners? I'll cut one's head off, then use it to kill the rest! Me: What? #103: Kill one peasant by decapitation, then pelt the rest with his head. Normal Player: Remind me why you're doing this? #103: I'm insane. Other Normal Player: My Paladin won't like this, can I intrude? Me: Sure... #103: No fair! #104: The *other* failed CN This player insists upon playing a CN but really can't roll play and often uses very idiotic actions to cover up the fact that they can't role play their way out of a wet paper bag. #105: The Cliche Halfbreed You've spent a full half hour describing the social situations of your campaign world to a large group of new players, in particular the outright hatred between two races. You've detailed the whys and whats and hows. Then a character says he wants a halfbreed of the two races that hate each other to no end. Me: So... you want to be a halfbreed between the two completely incompatible races? PC: Yup Me: How did you come to be? Those two races would never willingly mate, let alone produce an offspring. PC: Uh... what if one was raped? Me: The female would commit ritualistic suicide to avoid the dishonor of bearing a halfbreed. PC: Not this one. #106: The Ghandhi This character attempts to talk themselves out of every single combat situation, even those with constructs, undead, and other non-intelligent creatures. If there is a huge group of orcs bent on dominating the entire landscape and burning down the character's home they will be the first to try and "kill them with kindness". Wouldn't it be horrible if someone who posted for the first time on this thread took the coveted #101 spot? Don't worry, I won't. EDIT: Too late, changing all of the numbers...
The_EvilDungeon_Master 01-04-04, 03:50 PM	If you count them up, we're actually on... 107: "Lawful Stupid" This is the "Holier than thou" Paladin who does anything to "Uphold the Justice for the Land! For the Good of the People!" If you have anything other than a perfect Lawful stu- er, good party, he will most likely freak out and threaten to leave unless they "Change their evil evil ways". Common cure: Smack him upside the head with your players handbook every time he goes for the "Holier than thou" act.
The Master Weaver Is Warped 01-04-04, 03:54 PM	Originally posted by Tranq is anyone else worried by how fast this thread grew? :rofl: Glad I am not the only one who noticed this.
Vaarkheef 01-04-04, 04:41 PM	108: I'm special This one rocks. Really, check it out: that player hates doing what's expected from him. Playing a fighter or barbarian, he will write poetry and get involved in political intrigues instead of "fighting"; playing a rogue, he will wear heavy armor and wield a two-bladed sword; playing a ranger, he'll carry a harp, a flute and a violin, put skill points in Perform Music and expect to be treated like a music superstar. When another player dares doing anything that looks like a logical action for his class (ie: a wizard casting a spell of some sort) he will whine about how that player's not being original. Yet, when he gets to play a chaotic evil half-orc barbarian, he always end up killing innocent people in alleys, chopping their heads off and spilling their blood all over the place. Go figure...
Ssussunriyh 01-04-04, 05:20 PM	109: the Control-Freak This one is usually encountered as the DM - a DM with ego issues. He sets you on a seemingly impossible quest, which you cannot complete without help from his various NPCs. He tries to make the PCs grovel and kiss up to every single one, even the local commoner merchant who they buy a coil of rope from. In his campaign, evil is monolithic; all evil creatures are in league, and seem to know precisely what the PCs are up to at any given moment. Their intelligence network makes the CIA look like the Keystone Cops. When the PCs seem to be making progress on the quest, the BBEG appears out of nowhere, kicks their collective butt, sets them back at square one, and vanishes before they can fight back. Which means they have to go bootlick yet another bunch of NPCs. Arrrrgh!!! Urge... To... Kill... Rising...!!!
SmiloDan 01-04-04, 05:27 PM	110: the guy with 1,000,000 dice. I mean, do you really NEED a dozen d12s?
Neja Masachora 01-04-04, 05:49 PM	#111: The "Custom Race" Character Even after you've provided a gargantuan selection of races and classes, this player insists upon making a new one up, usually one with mind boggling special abilities. Lesser versions of this exist, but they aren't really a problem. You can usually provide them with something close to it. PC: I want a hellfire elf! They live underground and have black skin and can cast Hellball at will! Me: How about a fire elf? They're almost identical... although they can't use epic magic like that. Would that work? PC: No. #112: The Off Duty DM This player spends more time DMing that they do playing, they've often been doing so since the 1970s, although they don't have to have been to be annoying. They spend more time berating you about even the most insignificant flaw in your DMing that the game grinds to a halt within the first minute. Even when they're right, their annoying behavior cancels all of it out.
The Master Weaver Is Warped 01-04-04, 06:08 PM	#113 The Dice Rattler Nerves completely shot due to excessive clicking of plastic. Hard to think straight, handful of 40d6 shaking next to my ear. :headexplo "You're a fighter. There isn't a way in hell you are going to roll all those dice at once. Put them down, before I make you eat them with ketchup." and their close cousins #114 The competitors These always occur in pairs. They roll their d20 constantly. "I got a 15." "Ha, I got a 17." "I can beat that." Roll, roll, roll. Sitting on my hands, to keep from boxing their ears.
Luminous Crayon 01-04-04, 06:34 PM	Originally posted by SmiloDan 110: the guy with 1,000,000 dice. I mean, do you really NEED a dozen d12s? Yes. Yes I do. Back away from my dice, man.
Felonious Monk 01-04-04, 06:35 PM	#115: The Paradox This player often/always plays a class/alignment/race that they are utterly incapable of roleplaying. One common combination is the Paladin or Cleric with no sense of morals/justice/good whatever who will spend most of the party's time on side quests that resulted from Atonement spells. I have also seen the Puppy Daisy Bunny Thief - a rogue (or thief) who will not sneak, pick pockets, or do anything useful for the party because 'it's not nice'.
Veton 01-04-04, 07:18 PM	116. The Balancer This player attempts to keep the Neutral part of their alignment, usually when they are neutral on the good-evil axis. This would be fine, but the acts tend to be extreme. First they do something good, and then something really bad, and then something else that's kinda good, and then something sorta good, and then something evil, and then something good...wash, rinse, repeat 'till the DM loses his mind.
ElFenrir 01-04-04, 08:10 PM	117. "Bad Dice! Bad!" The person with 1,000,000 dice that takes it one step further. They will stick with dice, warm them up, put little hot towels around them, and 'test' them constantly. The minute they mess up, they yell at the dice and pull out a new one, 'grounding' the other one until it promises to 'behave.' (Granted, me and the crew jokingly do this now and then, but some people take this way too far.) 118. "I love furries." Taking it one step further than someone who just wants to play the odd animal race once in awhile(like OA's monkey men, or a lizard man or something), these people take their anthromorphs waaaay to far. We are talking the people who dress up as 'furries...':uh-huh:
Neja Masachora 01-04-04, 08:11 PM	116. The Balancer Sheesh, I thought they died out with 2e.
The_EvilDungeon_Master 01-04-04, 08:12 PM	119: The video gamer This is the guy who always plays Video games, as opposed to Pen and paper. If you hear someone say "I'll talk to a random villager to get information!" No, I'm sorry, there are no One-Line-NPC's in Dungeons and Dragons.
LordofChaos 01-04-04, 08:15 PM	to the guy and no dice you can never have too many dice, you could lose them, have them stolen or have to lend them to a trillion players who suck to much to own any
Rancorpit 01-04-04, 08:28 PM	121: The Greedy One No matter what his character's class or alignment might be - they always care for one thing only, and that thing is money. No, even magical items won't do - he wants money.
d-pirate 01-04-04, 09:42 PM	The Gate-Crasher: #122 This is the player that believes break DC is for wusses and tries to bash in every thing in site. DM: The door isn't locked but appears stuck. PC: Well time to hack it down with my axe. DM: You don't want to force it open? PC: Oh no I can't fail this way. Which in dungeons can be okay except its the wizard with a 8 strength trying to bash down the iron door with his quarterstaff. "Come on guys, won't you aid another with your slings and saps?"
AntiDjinn 01-04-04, 10:33 PM	My, how my little thread has grown. Guess I underestimated the volume of DM frustration. In all fairness to players, though, some of these players only need to be watched for so you can challenge and motivate them properly; they are not all out to intentionally derail your game. I don't mind a #96 (unless he has been playing for years and still can't grasp the basics) because at least he generally wants to participate and have fun. Give me enthusiastically innept over skillfully jaded any day. That being said, to be terminated on sight: #123 Ever Questus Never Shuddupus. He plays that game to the point of having no significant real world contacts. Worse, he speaks in the jargon inherent to the MMORG. So he calls your monsters "MOBs" and instead of attacking they "go aggro" His every statement is a stream of blather that can't really be called metagamespeak because it makes no real world sense to the other players either.
David777 01-04-04, 10:36 PM	#124 the template-ist this player will spend upwards of an hour looking through the monster manual "can i be a genie" "no" etc.. then will add as many templates as possible even after the game has begun "so i am level 7 now can i trade in 4 of those levels and become [insert template here]? i once had a half-elf half celestial natural werebear paldin that became half demon (as well as half celestial) and tried to get vampirism... he was level 4 in a level 20 campaign even with his con of 40 something and imunites to all elements but sonic he still died Him: i turn to bear form and charge Me: the wizard says a single word and you die Him: WTF Me: power word kill, look it up... and as an outsider you cannot be raised :smirk:
Dasein 01-04-04, 10:42 PM	125: My Sword is My Character This player becomes upset any time he might be in danger of losing a particularly nice magic weapon/armor/etc., and god forbid his weapon be sundered, he's liable to walk out or sulk the rest of the night. 126: Moochers They come to your house, eat your food and drink your soda, and never chip. You know they can afford to throw in 5 bucks, but they never do. 127: Never Learned to Share The opposite of the moocher, this is the person who will bring a whole bag of chips, some dip and a 6 pack of soda, and not offer to share even one chip with the rest of the group. Dasein
David777 01-04-04, 10:43 PM	#128. non-level-up-er this player will roll his hp when he levels up but nothing else. this gets very anoying when you have been playing for a while and his wizard still only has 3 spells per day or when he fails a saving throw "hang on i haven't done my new base saves yet" or the level 6 ftr with +2 base attack...
The_Dark_One 01-04-04, 10:43 PM	110: the guy with 1,000,000 dice. I mean, do you really NEED a dozen d12s? Yes, you do. In fact, you need at least 30 of each common die, and half a dozen d30's and d100's.
Noremac 01-04-04, 11:26 PM	First of all, no, you do not need that many dice. I have 3 d20s and 2 of the other types....but anyway.... 129.) Shut up and make sense This is the PC who does things that you just could not do...and I don't mean 'using magic' or anything. I mean, well, here's an example... Me: "Obviously the town guard was not kidding about the danger of the Arctic Plains, as you see a Frost Worm and a Remorhaz fighting in the distance..." Psion: "Let's sit and watch the fight..." (I begin RPing the combat between the creatures) Rogue (No. 129, being totally serious): "I carve a chair out of snow, and sit down to watch the fight..." Rest of Party: "..." (This REALLY happened...) 130.) "What's wrong with my dice?" This PC will roll up stats for a character, and get all 18s 5 times in a row. Then he gets mad or tries to compromise when I don't let him use them (I'll roll 5, and you roll the last one...). Or, he will roll his d20 and get 20, 20, 20, 20, 20, and 20 and ask why I make him use my dice... 131.) "Wait, you can only do a certain number of things per round?" This PC doesn't understand that not every action is a free action. Psion: "I stab at the enemy with my spear. Then I back away 30ft and manifest Lesser Body Adjustment on myself, and ready an action to manifest Dimension Slide if I am attacked and ready ANOTHER action to drink a potion of Cure Moderate Wounds..." Me: "...how many times do I have to tell you, you can't do a metric ton of actions in one turn!?!?"
ObsidianIchor 01-05-04, 01:12 AM	#132 The Sidequester It doesn't matter what's going on in the main plotline of the campaign, the Sidequester will always find some way to completely throw the session off track. It doesn't matter you've got to leave for the most dire mission, that only your party can accomplish due to circumstances. This may be intentional or unintentional. Depending on how dire these sidequests are, it may be fun or it may be the most annoying thing ever. This is inspired by a player that I regularly game with, who is sometimes called "The King of Sidequests." A great RPer, fun to game with, but sometimes the sidequests get annoying...please, do NOT burn down the forest surrounding the town because you wanted some food and the tavern wasn't open so you felt the need to club a sheep and cook it in the underbrush of a forest. Sorry Dude, I couldn't resist : P
hivemind[MVGC] 01-05-04, 03:35 AM	#133 Neutral Greedy Ahh I forgot this one. This is the guy who always needs to be a spellcaster so he can identify all the magic items the party finds first, and cull out the good stuff for himself. Usually lies about what all the stuff is, too. We have one of these in our group (DAN!!!111). He does things like Identify a Ring of Wizardry, pocket it, and tell the other wizard in the party that it was a Ring of Featherfalling. #134 The Dice Fondler This is the guy who must shake his dice in his hand for 30 seconds before tossing them on the table. He'll be doing nothing but a full attack, and will have finished describing his turn's actions ("I Power Attack for five"), but is still inexplicably shaking dice...
der_gogo 01-05-04, 07:02 AM	Originally posted by AntiDjinn #123 Ever Questus Never Shuddupus. He plays that game to the point of having no significant real world contacts. Worse, he speaks in the jargon inherent to the MMORG. So he calls your monsters "MOBs" and instead of attacking they "go aggro" His every statement is a stream of blather that can't really be called metagamespeak because it makes no real world sense to the other players either. Oh, yes, I hate this type! Always wants some tank to put agro on the Mob in order to be the main damage dealer. There also has to be a Monk in the party for kiting.... AAAARRGGGGHHH!! # 135 : The slow Calculator!!!! When making a full attack action, this Player takes his time. He rolls a dice. Then he starts: "This is a 9. I have an attack bonus of +12. This gives me 21. But I also got Weapon Focus for +1. So I attack on 22. No, my weapon is magical at +2. Ah, and -1 for flurry of blows. This is 22 then. No, wait, it is 21! And I am flanking, oh my! Flanking is +2, right? Then I am at +23 to attack!!! Do I hit? Okay, damage is 1d6 + My Strength is 14, so this gives me +2..... .... GM, WAKE UP! I still have 3 attacks left!!!!!!!
Northen_Spur 01-05-04, 09:12 AM	I've readed the entire thing twice Maybe I missed it is it was posted before... 136. The Player Killer (PK) Often related to the Munchkin already posted, "Since Gerald is assleep, I slith his throat, steal his stuff and run off to the next town" 137. The authority Hater (aka: Anarchist) He's not playing a evil character, he's Chaotic Good but goes into full anarchist mode in any organised town. DM: You Enter the town of Everwatch, a town built around a temple of Helm. Steep walls protect this city and the capitain of the guard stops you at the gate. "Good eveing Gents I am Captain Darmor, welcome to Everwatch before you enter I'll need your names and city of origins and the fee to enter the city armed is 15 silver pieces." PC: "Up yours Darmor I ain't giving you my name, nor my city of origin, nor 15 silvers! People should be free! not oppressed by your religious rules!" DM: "Well no name, no origins, no silver, no respect for helm, NO ENTERY!" other pc's: " Ah come on, we need to speak with to the inn keeper, Alexander Swift... Our contact in Silvermoon told us he has the information we seek" DM:" Fine tell me what I want to know, plus the payment" PC: "Fine John Smith, from Sigil" I throw the money on the ground. Finaly the other pc's manages to convince the captain not to throw the anarchist Pc in Jail... I described the town as a safe orderly town, where people seem content. Pc: I try to find a barel or a chariot or anyother kind of platfrom to be higher. DM: you find one, but what for? Pc: I stand up and I shout "People Everwatch the Helmities are oppressing you! you should be free of their tyrinical thumb and live as you choose! Abandon their laws and rebel againts their authority! Fight now! DM: 20 City guards and a Helmite priest surrounds you, "Come with us before the magistrate" PC: "Never! I will fight for freedom! If you kill me I will be a martyr" Other Pc's: "Officer we have no idea who is this crasyman, he just followed us one day..." 138: The moral-Philosipher The Gnoll growls and points his spear before you "Me hungry! you become food" PC1: I attack the gnoll Pc2: "Wait, is it moraly right to kill this Gnoll? He's just hungry maybe if we offer it food?" PC1: It's evil, don't argue let just kill him as fast as possible. Pc2: But is it realy evil? are we any better than him? maybe he has a familly or maybe it's a pregnant female looking for food... I offer it some ration here have food Gnoll: Me no want food, me want to eat you! Pc1: you see it's evil Pc2 but still...
Arilou_skiff 01-05-04, 09:12 AM	136. The Scattergun Dicer This is the guy that, when throwing dice, always somehow makes them scatter all over the room. THey *never* land where they should.
The Master Weaver Is Warped 01-05-04, 09:25 AM	Originally posted by Arilou_skiff 136. The Scattergun Dicer This is the guy that, when throwing dice, always somehow makes them scatter all over the room. THey *never* land where they should. Usually all over the battle mat, knocking out minis, moving die used by DM for monsters, and onto the floor, so when said player crawls under the table to retrieve dice, the table is rocked and shaken causing further disruction.
Raist27m 01-05-04, 10:26 AM	What about the Drama Queen? This player, be it male or female, shows up to only a few games here and there. Generally, a game session with a drama queen will involve hearing about how aweful his/her life is, and an expectation for everyone to have a pity party for the player. Common quotes, "I'm SOOOO tired!", "My kitty kept me awake all night.", and some form of, "Everyone's always picking on me.". And the Stinker. This is the guy who plays like a champ, knows the rules, and is generally fun to be around, except for one thing. This guy hasn't bathed since the first time he touched a die with other than six sides on it.
Gothic_Demon 01-05-04, 11:02 AM	How's about... The Doodler: No matter how interested, no matter how well played, no matter how dangerous, this player seems to have far more interest in drawing stuff than actually playing. They draw on their character sheets (front and back), on their dice tins, even on the battle mat when the DM isn't looking... The Architect: 12d6, 13d6, 14d6, 15d6, now I'll cap it off with a d20! Hey guys, look at my wonderful tower o' dice!!!
Alisair Longreach II 01-05-04, 11:07 AM	# 138 The Human Wall of Noise. This player TALKS VERY LOUDLY ALL THE TIME, when he is not roleplaying he will turn his back to the DM and TALK VERY LOUDLY with the other players. # 139 Respect Me, I'm Important. This player thinks he is entitled to respect from the other players because he is playing a Lawful Good Cleric or Paladin and gives them orders that he expects to be carried out, of course he sulks when the other players treat him like the idiot he is.
Raist27m 01-05-04, 12:21 PM	Originally posted by Neja Masachora #112: The Off Duty DM This player spends more time DMing that they do playing, they've often been doing so since the 1970s, although they don't have to have been to be annoying. They spend more time berating you about even the most insignificant flaw in your DMing that the game grinds to a halt within the first minute. Even when they're right, their annoying behavior cancels all of it out. In the last long-term game I ran, I had two of these. One of them wasn't too bad, but the other literally harassed me to the point that I had to end the campaign because I just couldn't deal with it any more. Emails that were four to ten pages long (occasionally longer). Snide comments during the game. It was so annoying that I very nearly hit him at one point. He corrected me on a rule involving AoO. Not a big deal, if he'd been right. However, looking at the chart in the PHB that lists things that can cause an AoO, the action WAS on there, when he'd said that it wasn't. However, he felt the need to make several off-hand remarks off to the side. I was so furious by the end of the game, that when he cracked a joke about someone incurring an AoO, I nearly kicked him in the head. I decided at that point that I was ending the campaign. It wasn't worth losing a good friend over. Great guy. Just couldn't take off the DM hat, and couldn't accept a DM ruling with grace.
LordofChaos 01-05-04, 12:51 PM	i guess #139: The player who thinks that everyone should be tailored for them, every loot should be theirs, they can do anything, be anything, cheats, can't roleplay (except insane CE, and that doesn't count), attempts to min/max and usually fails, always thinks they are right, cant hold food in their hand if their life depended on it, had "lucky dice", tries to take banned things as soon as they become banned, hogs templates, demands to be more powerful than the PCs, and when not, insist they did most of the important stuff in the battle, insists that everything is useful, and cursed, insists on torching everything, killing everyone, ignoring all plot hooks, purposefully ruining quests, being all around stupid about what to do in a given situation, no matter how obvious, not knowing rules and bonuses and making them up, insisting that they've played the longest and so they must be right, tries to be DM while a player, even though they have never DM'd with any skill or at all, and.... i could go on about this player, basically the sum of all horrible players, but i think you get the idea and YES this is a real person
AntiDjinn 01-05-04, 12:53 PM	Raist27m. What a lousy way to have a game end. My experience has been the opposite though: People who have actually DMed have some grasp of how much work the task entails and are more likely to respect your rulings. I am a firm believer in keeping the game enjoyable for all (including the DM) so you were right to end the game. So this would bring me to one I am sure most DMs have seen. A broad classification of player but annoying in all forms: #141: "You have it easy behind that screen" This player may be very experienced as a player and may have roleplayed a variety of characters, but he has never DMed. As such he has absolutely no grasp of how much work it is to build and run an entire cosmology. He assumes that because the DM makes the rulings, controls the events, and decides how all the monsters and NPCs act and react that all of this stuff just naturally pops into your head. It would never occur to him that every town and hamlet along with any inhabitatants of note had to be written up (or made up on the fly -- no easy task if you don't want this to be obvious). As far as he is concerned he has to do the hard part because he has to face down the monsters, bypass the traps and do all that tedious roleplaying; he has to follow the rules while you basically make the rules. Result: A player with a sense of entitlement who expects to be entertained but who has no respect for your world and no concern for whether or not you are enjoying the game.
atnoon 01-05-04, 01:54 PM	#142 The Copycat A variant from # 54 Clone, this guy doesn't clone known heroes like Drizzt but instead copy another players character. He builds the same character (with minor chances) because he finds it cool/good/powerfull and gets mad when someone calls him a copycat ("I made some changes, I didn't copy jhon's characters"). Believe me when I say that it gets really anoying when this guy copies the same character for 3 consecutive campaigns.
Lord Deadite 01-05-04, 02:20 PM	# 143 The no note keeper Even though you gave all the player special notes sheets, they either dont use them or write down mumbo jumbo. When you expect them to roleplay and fit all the clues together, they just stare at you and say uh... DM: What are you going to do now you've killed Saracek the demilich? Player: I'm going to that one town where we came from before and tell that guy Red rash... DM: You mean Reddesh from Arlenfold? Player: Yeah, that guy, and tell him that watchamaycallit, the thingy is dead. DM: Saracek the demilich? Player: I dont know, the guy we just killed. DM: Yeah Saracek, it's a floating skull btw...
LordofChaos 01-05-04, 07:08 PM	i used to be #141, but then my DM got very very angry at me, and now i have proudly and gladly claimed his spot
windquake 01-05-04, 07:22 PM	#142 Similar to the dice shaker guy. This guy always plays a mage or some other many d6 damage inflicting character. He always has 900,000 d6's around and when he eventually does is 100 billion d6 in damage. So he goes to roll.... And he literally rolls 1 die at a time. Adding them up as he goes.... I knew a guy that did this but to make it even more annoying, he held all the dice in his hand and would eject one at a time. Just throw the D*MN dice!
Raist27m 01-05-04, 07:27 PM	Originally posted by AntiDjinn Raist27m. What a lousy way to have a game end. My experience has been the opposite though: People who have actually DMed have some grasp of how much work the task entails and are more likely to respect your rulings. I am a firm believer in keeping the game enjoyable for all (including the DM) so you were right to end the game. So this would bring me to one I am sure most DMs have seen. A broad classification of player but annoying in all forms: #141: "You have it easy behind that screen" This player may be very experienced as a player and may have roleplayed a variety of characters, but he has never DMed. As such he has absolutely no grasp of how much work it is to build and run an entire cosmology. He assumes that because the DM makes the rulings, controls the events, and decides how all the monsters and NPCs act and react that all of this stuff just naturally pops into your head. It would never occur to him that every town and hamlet along with any inhabitatants of note had to be written up (or made up on the fly -- no easy task if you don't want this to be obvious). As far as he is concerned he has to do the hard part because he has to face down the monsters, bypass the traps and do all that tedious roleplaying; he has to follow the rules while you basically make the rules. Result: A player with a sense of entitlement who expects to be entertained but who has no respect for your world and no concern for whether or not you are enjoying the game. He has DMed before, just didn't pay much attention to the fact that his players didn't like it when he was playing an RPG to win, and didn't get the concept of situational modifiers. Ordinarily a +2...with him...+10, minimum. # 139 Respect Me, I'm Important. This player thinks he is entitled to respect from the other players because he is playing a Lawful Good Cleric or Paladin and gives them orders that he expects to be carried out, of course he sulks when the other players treat him like the idiot he is. <---- He was also VERY guilty of this. So, at the end of the campaign, which I'm still deciding whether or not to start up again at some point, once my patience reserves are back up, he takes Leadership. The only feat in the DMG, and expects me to accept it. Even though I've stated several times that I don't like the feat, and that leadership should be roleplayed, and the feat is a senseless hunk of crap in my campaign. *sigh* Looks like I'm still bitter, and that game won't be starting back up any time soon.
kclawhammer 01-05-04, 08:37 PM	#144 Hack n Slash This player only wants to play DnD for the fighting and will not role-play for the life of him. When entering a role-playing situation he will leave the table, go to the couch and play the latest video game. The only interaction he will have with a town and it's NPCs that you spent two hours making is 'I go to the Inn and sleep for 8 hours, and then go to the general store and buy 50 ft of rope.' Also known to revisit the blacksmith every day to see if he has any good items- a holdover from his video gaming.
Cindre2000 01-05-04, 09:04 PM	#145 "Can I borrow..." The player with no dice and constantly asks to borrow yours. The player who did not make an effort to get a pencil, a PHB, paper, etc. even if they are not financially challenged. #146 "It's just a Game" It is just a game to them. They do not really care what happens, they don't come half the time for no real reason, and doesn't understand why anyone else really cares. #147 The No Show They might show up every 4th session or less and expect their character to still be around and alive. As well as being filled in as the game is being played.
AntiDjinn 01-05-04, 10:33 PM	#148 The Resolutionary This player has just gone on a diet, or is trying to quit smoking, or is giving up some other vice. He/she would really appreciate it if the the rest of the group would support this effort by not engaging in the selected vice either. In other words: We all have to suffer. So please, no chips and pizza, its carrot sticks all around. No, no! please don't waive that still warm Krispy Kreme doughnut under my nose -- think of the carbs! If they are quitting smoking then even their characters are going to be Chaotic Belligerent for a few games. The good news: This shall pass, and soon. Give 'em 4 weeks, max.
Link182 01-05-04, 10:34 PM	#149 The Man Without a Past WHen I as the Dm wanted a short backstory on the characters so that I might throw elements interesting to the PCs, they provided none. To this day after 3 years in the same campaign, I have no idea where this guy came from. #150 Mr. Monty Python For no reason this guy starts quoting The Holy Grail. All the other players join in and have a gay old time as time slips by. I cringe.
Northen_Spur 01-05-04, 11:13 PM	151. The I am on Call Player The player works at a place where he's on call but insit he can play a full game. Not bad if one or twice but to often it becomes anoying. This was in a game where I was a player. Pc: Ummm, I am on police dispatch on call list tonight DM: what!? It's been 4 sesions Pc: Yeah, I am the only few bilingual guys there about 20 min in the game his cell goes off. Pc: Damm sorry guys... I need to go. 152. The new edition booster Dm: Ok, I know your used too 3ed, but in this group where all 2ed. Pc: Why? 3ed has blah blah blah blah and this , that and the whole.... Dm: Don't care at this table we are all 2ed players. I have my 2ed books and character sheet. Pc: Oh, that's ok I have my 3ed books an character sheet with me. Dm: We are playing 2ed. Got that!
Dasein 01-06-04, 12:18 AM	153: I found this PrC/spell/race/weapon etc. on the internet, can I use it? This player will scour the internet for new material, and insist upon using it, no matter how out of place or unbalanced it may be. Dasein
Ash Grey 01-06-04, 12:52 AM	154: The DM’s Brother/Sister The player that everyone hates because he/she always gets the best stuff, no matter the circumstances. Favoritism at is finest. Not only will they get the best stuff they are also prone to jumping up afew levels between gaming sessions because they LIVE with the DM!
Lord T Hawkeye 01-06-04, 02:16 AM	155: The packrat Ooh! A sheep, that looks handy, I'll take it. I'll keep this goblin's body in case we need a decoy. Never know when this brick could come in handy. STOP IT!!! 156: What's in a name? This one can be summed up by a comic from penny-arcade (the one comic on that site that was funny without having to read a 3 page backstory to get it) Fighter: Jim? Your name is Jim?! Jim: Yeah, I'm a black mage. Fighter: A ****ing black mage named Jim....that's real ****ing fantasy there! Jim: I'm not good at coming up with names. Fighter: Yeah? No ****!! Thanks a lot *******!! Jim: I can change it. Fighter: No you can't. You'll be a ****ing black mage named Jim and I'll be "That guy who hangs out with Jim!" Had a player playing as a shadow who got a spawn and insisted on naming it Jimmy. -_- I had the thing killed and made it look like an accident in a moment of rage. Call me petty but the name gave me a migraine.
Link182 01-06-04, 06:26 AM	#157 I'm Usually the DM in my game And you suck at it. I played as a guest in some game with the worlds worst DM (alright that's a matter for debate). I suggested allowing me to DM a game some time. The DM was not very responsive to that suggestion.
Nei 01-06-04, 08:15 AM	Originally posted by Gothic_Demon The Architect: 12d6, 13d6, 14d6, 15d6, now I'll cap it off with a d20! Hey guys, look at my wonderful tower o' dice!!! That's me! :D I'm quite good at it too, you know. I can balance multiple d6 on a d4! On-topic: #158: The Sheetless "Uhh, I forgot to bring my character sheet. But that's okay, I can remember most of it..." #159: The Disorganized "Yes, I'm sure I've written it down. It's on this page...no wait...on that page...I think...this will only take a minute...page 12 perhaps..." #160: The Practical Joker With Childish, Repetitive Jokes "I cast Light at his codpiece!" (laughs, expects everyone else to laugh as well) next adventure... "I cast Light at his codpiece!" (laughs, expects everyone else to laugh as well) next adventure... "I cast Light at his codpiece!" (laughs, expects everyone else to laugh as well) etc... #161: The Sadist Who Doesn't Think His Acts Are Evil This is the kind of player who -with a big grin on his face- tortures helpless people and then throws a fit when you shift his alignment to evil. He also always comes up with crappy excuses to justify his behaviour: "But he's a thief...I needed to tie him up because he would have gotten away otherwise. And I don't have ranks in Use Rope and Heal, so how was I supposed to know that the ropes were a bit too tight? And you know that I'd never actually do the things I told him I'd do to him...I was just joking! #162: The "That Was An OOC Comment!" Player This is the kind of player who talks in-game, discovers that he probably shouldn't have said some things, and then tries to backtrack his steps by saying that what he said before was all out of character. #163: The New-Character-A-Week-Player This is the player who rolls up a new character every time he has seen a new movie or show, and insists on playing this new one instead of his old one "because the old one was kind of boring and one-dimensional". EDIT: Just thought of #164: The-Player-Who-Bumps-The-Table-Deliberately-For-The-Sole-Purpose-Of-Knocking-Over-My-Tower-O'Dice This one needs no further explanation. Nei
Ssussunriyh 01-06-04, 08:25 AM	Originally posted by Nei #163: The New-Character-A-Week-Player This is the player who rolls up a new character every time he has seen a new movie or show, and insists on playing this new one instead of his old one "because the old one was kind of boring and one-dimensional." For the simple reason that the player himself is boring and one-dimensional, having no originality. "Monkey see, monkey do."
Twisted Puppy 01-06-04, 09:29 AM	Originally posted by The Master Weaver Is Warped Usually all over the battle mat, knocking out minis, moving die used by DM for monsters, and onto the floor, so when said player crawls under the table to retrieve dice, the table is rocked and shaken causing further disruction. This player then brings all activity at the table to a SCREACHING halt when, while retrieving dice from under the table at MWiW's feet, comments on the quality of the view. :devil:
The Master Weaver Is Warped 01-06-04, 09:53 AM	Originally posted by Twisted Puppy This player then brings all activity at the table to a SCREACHING halt when, while retrieving dice from under the table at MWiW's feet, comments on the quality of the view. :devil: :OMG! Ahhh!!!! You dirty old man.:embarrass :censored::censored:As bad as the teenage boys, you are. Them, at least I can make :blush: in revenge. ;):D
The Master Weaver Is Warped 01-06-04, 10:05 AM	#165 I cast commune... This player of clerics, rather than use his/her wits to figure out the plot, or anything else, will cast the commune spell, and ask the gods. Sorry, Pelor left the phone of the hook. The line is busy, and Pelor doesn't have call waiting.
Cindre2000 01-06-04, 11:20 AM	# 166 The Repeat, rinse and repeat, rinse and repeat DM: You see a horde of goblins Player: I cast fireball DM: You see an ooze Player I cast a fireball DM: You see a bunch of undead fighting townsfolk in a 20 by 15 room Player: I cast fireball DM: A red dragon charges Player: I cast fireball # 167 The XP hog These players will do anything to get xp. They try to get xp for talking to the bar tender, the wenches, the town guard, for shooting bottles, thwacking dummies, getting somewhere quickly, etc.
Twisted Puppy 01-06-04, 11:48 AM	Originally posted by The Master Weaver Is Warped :OMG! Ahhh!!!! You dirty old man.:embarrass :censored::censored:As bad as the teenage boys, you are. Them, at least I can make :blush: in revenge. ;):D Sadly, the only way I"m likely to stop being a dirty old man is when I become a DEAD old man.... (trying to remember if MWiW has a gun..) 168. The Do-Nothing who also cheats DM: Initiatives? player: 29, I rolled a natural 20 (player beside him gives a slight shake of his head to the DM) DM: *sighs* ok, you go.. what is your action? player: I move into the brush and cast Camouflage (The next round, as the party is engaged in a vicious combat) DM: Ok, they haven't seen you yet.. your action? player: well, if they aren't heading toward me, I'm just going to stay hidden.. (Combat ends, most party members badly hurt, this guy's character hasn't been scratched or even fired an arrow or swung a sword..) player: So how much experience do we get for the enounter? I only need X points to level. Oh, and I can use Y magic item (found on the dead bad guys) more than anyone else. DM and other players::hoppingma
Greldinard 01-06-04, 04:01 PM	169 The Item Greedy One Usely a halfling roque. Starts looting bodies while the combat is still going on. Tries to hide items while the party agreed to share everything found. Got the first three magical items the party found and starts to argue when someone else gets the fourth and then wants compensation in gold for it. 170 I'm not buying any book Although we all agreed to move on the 3rd edition this player refuses to buy (or even borrow) the new PHB and use this as an excuse for not knowing any rule.
Llathos 01-06-04, 04:52 PM	I can't help it: Lord T Hawkeye...what date was that strip published? I am desperately trying to find it to make a point to a player of mine....I can't find it in the archive to save my life...
eudas 01-06-04, 05:32 PM	Originally posted by Llathos I can't help it: Lord T Hawkeye...what date was that strip published? I am desperately trying to find it to make a point to a player of mine....I can't find it in the archive to save my life... it wasn't too long ago... [minutes later] still looking... [more minutes later] aha! http://www.penny-arcade.com/images/2003/20031010l.gif you're welcome. =) eudas
Telperion 01-06-04, 06:13 PM	171: the night-lifer Seriously, have you ever tried to run sessions for more than 8 hours, and still think that everyone's with you? Personally I try to limit my sessions to something like 6 hours, but that's just me. These players enjoy playing as long as they can sit, and coffee, tea, soda...whatever...keeps these guys up and running. It's a marathon I usually lose. The point is that my campaigns usually require thinking on the part of the players. So, by the time the clock hits mid-night everyone is going to be tired anyway. But not this guy! No! DM: Okay, let's call it a night. night-lifer: no, way! I'm all ready to take on that dungeon and crawl trough it before sunrise! rest of the group: * unhappy muttering * DM: sorry, no dice... night-lifer: but this is the only evening in the whole week I get to play! Not fair! DM: *shrugs and throws the group out* This sort of players can have the effect of dragging sessions beyond the bounds of a reasonable time to quit. And some of them are sneeky too.
Telperion 01-06-04, 06:28 PM	172: electricity dependant lap-tops are the thing of the future, and present. Still I'm finding out that these things require external sources of power all the time. I love a mess of wires on the floor and a over-used entension cord that shows all manner signs of deterioration. Its okay, as long as you have plenty of room to move around, but when things get cluttered it gets on my nerves.
Dungeon_Master 01-06-04, 09:48 PM	The Joe: This type of player is a munchkin. He also gets very violent and pretends to be the all-knowing, most intelligent person on the planet. He is often a compulsive liar. Enough said. The Over Suspicious player: He checks his inn room for traps and does not trust anything or anyone, but does not have a roleplaying-reason for it, such as "I'm a paranoid nutso". The metagamer/minmaxer/munchkin player: Often shares traits with the player type described above. About NEVER roleplays. The one-hour gamer: Can't stay long enough to complete a session, even when he really has nothing better to do. This type of player ussually can't work games into his schedule, but won't just leave the group because of that. The over-critical gamer: Often comments on other players "immaturity", how "immature" the other players are, and says "mature" themed games are completely "innapropriate", and feels that even if the other players don't have any problem with it, they should not play that type of game. He is over-critical of everything, and will not notice his own problems, preffering to point out what he finds not to his liking abotu other players.
Dungeon_Master 01-06-04, 09:49 PM	The Joe: This type of player is a munchkin. He also gets very violent and pretends to be the all-knowing, most intelligent person on the planet. He is often a compulsive liar. Enough said. The Over Suspicious player: He checks his inn room for traps and does not trust anything or anyone, but does not have a roleplaying-reason for it, such as "I'm a paranoid nutso". The metagamer/minmaxer/munchkin player: Often shares traits with the player type described above. About NEVER roleplays. The one-hour gamer: Can't stay long enough to complete a session, even when he really has nothing better to do. This type of player ussually can't work games into his schedule, but won't just leave the group because of that. The over-critical gamer: Often comments on other players "immaturity", how "immature" the other players are, and says "mature" themed games are completely "innapropriate", and feels that even if the other players don't have any problem with it, they should not play that type of game. He is over-critical of everything, and will not notice his own problems, preffering to point out what he finds not to his liking abotu other players.
jagggar 01-06-04, 10:08 PM	178: The fan-girl First thing out of the fan-girl's mouth when the DM introduces a new NPC is "Is he hott?" Often much scarier when seen in pairs. Usually has a specific type of obsession. Example: Obsession: Legolas. Fan-girl will ask if the NPC has pointy ears or an elf in general, then procede to ask if he's hot. OOC comments will be made about pulling on the NPC's "longbow" or sheathing his "longsword". Suduction attemtps may follow. (A friend and I are very guilty of this. Her character is now expecting.) 179: "This one time. . ." When not playing, he constantly talks of other games he's played. Before, after, and even during the game, he'll talk about experiences he's had with an entirely different group, no matter how uninteresting it is to the current group. 180: "This one time. . ."-Powergamer variant Somewhat similar to the "but my other DM" sorts. Will constantly talk about other games he's played in, often epic level. Upon further investigation, you learn that he started at no less than 15th-level, and the DM likes powergaming also. Will sometimes try to convice DM to let him run the character from the other campaign, no matter how many levels that character is above the rest of the party, that often has max HP and unearned ablitity scores.
green_yawgmoth 01-06-04, 10:19 PM	I feel bad now. For you see, I've done many of the things on this list. I currently have a half-dragon lich (2 templates! w00t!), I make terrible jokes (usually puns), and a few spells are off of the 'net. But to redeem myself: I can RP quite well, I don't argue with the DM if I can see he's set on not allowing something, and I can figure out my attack/damage/save rolls in less than 3 seconds.
Dungeon_Master 01-06-04, 10:43 PM	Originally posted by jagggar Example: Obsession: Legolas. Fan-girl will ask if the NPC has pointy ears or an elf in general, then procede to ask if he's hot. OOC comments will be made about pulling on the NPC's "longbow" or sheathing his "longsword". Suduction attemtps may follow. (A friend and I are very guilty of this. Her character is now expecting.) :rofl: I must confess, I'm guilty of this in a way, only I'm male and it's toward female elves. No crude jokes though. It's actually a very nice, mature relationship between her (the NPC) and my character (a DMPC). But it's a specific character, not any elf in general.
Dasein 01-07-04, 12:23 AM	I feel bad now. For you see, I've done many of the things on this list. I currently have a half-dragon lich (2 templates! w00t!), I make terrible jokes (usually puns), and a few spells are off of the 'net. But to redeem myself: I can RP quite well, I don't argue with the DM if I can see he's set on not allowing something, and I can figure out my attack/damage/save rolls in less than 3 seconds. Don't worry, the thing with these examples, though, is that most of them are not that bad, but can cause problems when taken to excess or done in a manner that disrupts the game. Using templates or stuff found on the internet is fine, but can be abused, which is why they should be watched for, but not outrightly prohibited. Dasein
William Coburn 01-07-04, 12:23 AM	Beyblade Fanboy Whenever asked to roll a dice he spins it at high speed, so that it will continue to twrill for half an hour. During this time he showts like he's at roster fight and the other player go off to find some mountain dew. *WHAM!* ...dig,dig,dig...
Ice Wizard 01-07-04, 01:24 AM	#180: Murphy's Advocate This one generally does his level best to make the game as fun as possible for everyone involoved. It just so happens that luck never seems to be on his side, and as such he just cannot seem to roll anything other than a "natural 1" or whatever is the absolute worst roll is in the game. This player usually has no conrol over this happening to him, but sometimes other playes wonder if this crappy luck is contagious. I'm sad to say that I am often guilty of this one :weep:
pookha 01-07-04, 01:29 AM	181. The Annoyingly Lucky Looks a lot like the cheater, but even when rolls are made in full view, it's still 20, 20, 20, 20, 20, max damage, max damage, save, save, save for none. 182. The accidental plot destroyer Sometimes is combined with 181. Does things likes criticals the important plot element NPC for 158 points of damage when we needed the info from him.
Telperion 01-07-04, 01:42 AM	183: the replica nerd. Since things medieval are cool to some people they want to make real-life copies out of them and then bring them to the sessions. First he has to show it around to everyone, and whenever a moment comes when the item in question is "needed" he promptly follows his roleplaying with a live-demonstration. So far I have only seen a desert eagle (modern setting), a caltrop and some other rather harmless stuff...but I hear the guy is working on a full-plate armor...:nonono:
Pongolyn 01-07-04, 01:57 AM	184. The Nerf Knight Much like 183, except he doesn't always bother making his own stuff. The theatrical fencing class he took his freshman year is all he needs to validate himself as an authority over all forms of "medieval combat," including spellcasting. He likes to carry a wooden sword to game sessions and talk about how good he is with it. Occasionally he dresses up as his character. When another player tells the DM what they'd like their character to do, Nerf Knight will often interrupt with a 10-minute tirade about how it's not physically possible ("unless you do it THIS way..."). He will also repeatedly attempt to regale the players with boring accounts of his re-enactment group's last War, and how it was so much more realistic than the current battle his PC is supposed to be fighting. Favored class: elven ranger, or whatever he wants to be in real life
Vaarkheef 01-07-04, 02:40 AM	185. "Oh-God-You're-So-Stupid" This one is for all of us who occasionnally like playing clumsy, dumb, unlucky or plain weird PCs. Whenever a character does something "stupid" or something which doesn't particularly help the whole party, this guy will be the first to utter "oh God you're so stupid" while his character isn't even there (and says that looking at you, the player). He thinks it's SO DARN IMPORTANT to not miss any of the clues left by the DM and do all those little things "that'll get us there" that he just can't accept that someone's not exactly playing Sherlock Holmes, like he does. Give him any race, class, background, alignment or whatever, he'll never be the one who jokes around, pokes things with sticks, make sentences who make no sense at all or do anything not "XP relevant". His PCs are ALWAYS smart, ALWAYS have a way to cut your throat if you ever get too much on his nerves, ALWAYS seem to know a little bit too much (in a metagaming-style way) and ALWAYS want to be respected, listened to, not interrupted when they talk, etc. He wants to "win the game" and other PCs are obstacles in his way to victory.
StormKnight 01-07-04, 10:51 AM	186. The "I must have all the books!" Complete opposite of 170 (I'm not buying any book) this player rushes out and buys any book that gets mentioned, even if you insist they don't need it or that you are just doing a one-shot or they should just use your copy until they are sure they like it Then they get annoyed about not being able to use their book anymore, or that they were forced to buy it and don't like it. 187. I really wanna... Insists they want to play a certain kind of character/game, but then shows no interest in actually doing it. I had a player tell me she really wanted to play in a political game with lots of roleplaying and wanted to play a courtier character. She then spent all the first sessions running around fighting things, and when there was a big party with all the important people and lots of effort I had put into all sorts of things that could develop there, it went something like this: Player: "I gather gossip. I roll a (X)." Me: "Ok, what are you talking about?" Player: "Gossip. I rolled (X)." Me: "Well, what do you want to say? Or who do you want to talk to?" Player: "I rolled (X). That's a good roll!" Me: Um ok...maybe I can prod her along here..."So, Lady Evaine notices you listening to the conversation and turns to you. "And what do you think of..." Player: "C'mon, what do I find out! I rolled (X)!" Me: WHAM! WHAM! WHAM! (Head impacting table)
Linthar 01-07-04, 02:17 PM	188: The Weird Namer This player is relatively harmless but his characters names are long strings of vowels and constants that make no sense like Argakblacgracokok or something else along the same lines. Note this is based on a real player and a real character name of his although I certainly spelled it wrong. Luckily he only did a name like that for one character.
Linthar 01-07-04, 02:17 PM	edit: Double Post
Dungeon_Master 01-07-04, 02:33 PM	Originally posted by Telperion 183: the replica nerd. Since things medieval are cool to some people they want to make real-life copies out of them and then bring them to the sessions. First he has to show it around to everyone, and whenever a moment comes when the item in question is "needed" he promptly follows his roleplaying with a live-demonstration. So far I have only seen a desert eagle (modern setting), a caltrop and some other rather harmless stuff...but I hear the guy is working on a full-plate armor...:nonono: I actually wouldn't mind a player like that (as long as he wasn't DEMONSTRATING ALL THE TIME....) The "Goku Wanna-be". This is much like the "Nerf Knight". This player type often watches Dragonball Z and/or Power Rangers. He often get's up to demonstrate the new "martial arts move" or odd spell that doesn't seem to qualify as arcane, divine, or psionics he learned on TV. He'll often select another player or, worse, the DM to "demonstrate" on. He often has an unhealthy obsession with Katanas and the monk class. The "Throws the Book at them" player. Not a figure of speech. He literally picks up the book and whacks someone over the head. The "Sarlac Pit". This player will insist that you get him food. This player type will result in half drank sodas, half eaten food, and trash all over your gaming room. Of course, it'll be YOUR job to clean up..... The "Let's Hit It with a Stick!" player. Exactly what it sounds like. The answer is ALWAYS "kill it!"
True Archon 01-07-04, 06:12 PM	193 (I think): The 'Pfft' Player. This player thinks that everyone playing is against them. The DM sunders his sword... pfft. A player teases her.... pfft. The group decides on chinese instead of pizza.... pfft. Usually this player will sulk for a bit, not say anything to contribute except "whatever", and when their bitterness really takes hold, will get up and say "I've gotta go to bed" or "I have laundry to do" as an excuse to leave even if it spoils the game. These players will even extend it beyond this session, and will refuse to play the next session (even if their character is pivotal to the story), and lay out another excuse why they can't play. Really terrible 'Pfft' players will even take their bitterness with them "out of campaign" and believe that they are being "picked" on by their friends. 194: The Cameo-Nostalgia Player. This player has played one character in their life that they love the best. If they haven't been to a few sessions, or a whole different campaign is underway, this player will ask if they can play their nostalgia character (who is also usually quite more powerful than the other characters). This player will also try to show off with their nostalgia character if the DM does allow them in their campaign, and bring up things that the character has done in the past over and over and over and over..... 195: The "Bitter if another player got more XP" player. This player hates when another player may have received more experience for their actions, or if another player is separated from the group, and single-handedly defeats their encounters and gets all the xp to themselves.
Rudigrrr 01-07-04, 06:39 PM	196. The custom PrC not that all PrCs made by players are bad but this person has decided that no prestige in any book is quite right for him/her and decides instead that they must make one.... often excrutiatingly overpowered 197. "no one class is enough" this player is fairly convinced that his ranger 2/rogue 2/bard 2/sorceror 2 is better than any other 8th level character, until said player realizes that they cannot fight well, cannot cast well, and can barely pick pocket a commoner, then said player often feels underpowered and a more than a little upset, they are also typically the first player near death in every combat situation 198. the leadership feat - alas i am ever so guilty this player must make sure that cohort and all 20 1st level followers are with him/her at all times and that they are ok, often times slows things down in order to make sure they are all set and ready to go, or talking with them, or frantically riding/running to where they are located in order to keep them from dying, this player typically has a special mount, familiar, or animal companion to watch over as well
gleep 01-07-04, 07:24 PM	199. The "I Gotta Tell You Everything About My Character" Player. This player will proceed to tell you ever little trick, spell effect, stat bonus, feat and even shoe size of their character and then elaborate with examples using all sorts of encounter ideas. They will rattle on incessantly... usually with a high-pitched or otherwise annoying voice. 200. "Waaa waaa waaa waaa" The player that whines about everything. They'll whine about someone else holding a needed rulebook too long. They'll whine that they're not given enough time to generate their character. They'll whine that they don't know the rules well enough. They'll whine when someone else gives them advice. They'll whine when their all-important character concept can't be built with the rules they make up and actually have to use the rules in the books. They'll whine because other players tell them to stop whining. --gleep
AlexBurel 01-07-04, 08:06 PM	201: the brain (I am one of these, I'm not a bad player, but it can get annoying at times) Without even cheating, manages to get his Int score greater than that of some deities. Constantly makes reference to obsurce planes, layers of the abyss, crazy monsters, etc. Even when it is not relavent to the current discussion. Dissects every moster killed so he can "learn biology". Gets annoyed when told to shut up and even more annoyed when the information he didn't share could have saved the party's butt.
Radagast1955 01-07-04, 08:31 PM	Originally posted by Linthar [B]188: The Weird Namer Yep, that's my guys. The cure? DM: Ok, everyone introduce their characters to the rest of the party. Player1: I'm Ralfaleous Derhouser of House Edraon Player2: Meet Sergenalas Xanthathor, world renouwned magician Player3: Akkas Muleiver here. Player4: I'm Garrivage Kolthwaite of forest Exenter. DM: Ok then, We've got Ralph, Sarge, Axe and Hmm.. Garbage? RADS
Dungeon_Master 01-07-04, 09:21 PM	Heck, it's better than the D20 Modern player who names himself "50 Cent".... o_O "YOU PRONOUNCE IT "FITTY" BI(censored)!!"
Qual 01-07-04, 09:49 PM	202: The Saboteur The one player who's only purpose is to destroy your adventure/campaign. DM: There's a noise in the forest. It sounds like someone's weeping. Group: We cautiously head over, weapons drawn. Saboteur: I go the other way. I'm looking for an outhouse. DM:??? Even better... GM: You meet the informant in the dark alley. He leans in close... Saboteur: I kill him. DM: Umm...He's got a note on him... Saboteur: I burn it... 203: The Vengeful Brother. A character accidentally or diliberately kills another character. It doesn't matter what nerw character is made, it's going to be the brother of the dead charcter, looking for revenge. So he sets out to kill the rest of the group. If that one dies...another brother. 204: "But I can do that in real life!" Player who gets angry when his character doesn't have the skill they need and argues that it's really simple, and since they (the player) can do it in real life their character should be able to as well. A real quote: "Oh...Common! I can build a laser in my basement! Why can't my character build a laser!" 205: The Endangerer Simply does things with no regard for the safety or well being of any of the other characters. Like a pyromancer immolating oneself when the party is either trying to sneak from an army or is simply in close quarters without any protections from fire. 206: The Communal Hog So the group has limited funds, healing potions, luck points or whatever that is pooled togther. This character goes off on his own, gets into some stupid trouble and goes ahead and uses up all of the party's communal wealth. 207: The Invicible Not actually incincible, just thinks that they are. Usually a fighter, strides right into fight after fight, usually leaving the party behind to get all the "glory", and is then surprised when they drop dead. 208: The Immortal "I can't die." The character simply regenerates every time, or is impervious to all attacks. Now tell me, what fun is that?
Lord_Apollyon 01-07-04, 11:06 PM	209) The "Elves are 1337" Dude. You know those people who only play elves, in their infinite variations. They are the people who play Elven Barbarians, because everything is just janky. 210) The Dex Monkeys Usually ties into 203. The people who can't go anywhere without their gloves of dex +6, their belt of agility +6, their amulet of dex +6, their full plate of dex +6, their greatsword of dex +6, and their underwear of dex +6. They usually will make up for it by neglecting their con, int, cha, and wis, so they have 10 hp at level 5, have trouble beating a head of cabbage in a game of checkers, and couldn't convince an avatar of a deity that their deity likes them. And they complain about how they can't add their dex to hit for greatswords, and about how they always seem to be almost dying when they get hit by something. 211) The Oriental Adventures Guy The guy who is obsessed with L5R. He tries to play a OA monk from somewhere in a Faerun game, in the middle of the Sword Coast. And of course, he uses these :censored::censored::censored::censored: ing oriental names for a GREATSWORD!!! And he gets offended when we call his weapon by it's D&D name, and not the OA name for the exact same weapon.
Winternova 01-07-04, 11:44 PM	i had a combination 200 and 204 at one point, that schtick got old real fast. "But it's easy to make C4! I just need some diet cola/hair gel/some other rediculous item!" "Well, then show me - make some, or at the very least bring it up on the net, and we'll make it go!" "Nevermind, oh my God that's so unfair..." 212 - the character of holding. His 10 str character packs an M-82, a full electronics kit, and ten pounds of C4, but is NEVER encumbered, and if called on it, "I put that in my car!" until the moment he needs it, when it's suddenly "I had it all along! I don't have to run back to the car - I never put it there!" (Seeing as how player creativity is a little low, I can be a stickler for the "how" sometimes...)
der_gogo 01-08-04, 09:18 AM	# 213: Mr. Equipment A little bit similiar to #212, he carries everything he needs with him. But when you look on his char sheet, all that is standing there is "Camping Gear", and "Adventuring Stuff". And then, when adventuring: "Yes, I have 3 flasks of Holy Water with me! See, this is typical Adventuring gear!" "Yes, I got a 10 feet long ladder with me! Camping Gear!" "Of course I got a small cage with me.... " etc.
Utumno 01-08-04, 12:08 PM	214. The Vampire the Masquerade Player. Not that I have anything against the game itself, but this player is the kind of player who cannot distinguish between the differing themes in Vampire and D&D. This is the kind of player who when rolling up a character says something like PC: "I want to play a little girl who always walks around in a sun dress barefoot and scatters black rosepetals everywhere she goes." DM: "OK.... But what is she going to do when the Gnolls try to eat her!" Another example. This actually happened DM: You walk further into the dungeon and you find to your surprise that you are surrounded by orcs. PC: Take us to your prince! I use dominate on them (playing a rogue). The ultimate frustration occurs when they insist on playing a vampire. Yeah, the party is going to forsake 12 hours a day of adventure just for you. Give me a break!
gleep 01-08-04, 01:12 PM	215: The Resonating Countdowning Statmonkeys This type of player is okay on his or her own but when there are two or more they can be pretty irritating. Every time the DM hands out experience they will calculate exactly how much more they need to level and loudly proclaim the amount. If there's more than one, they will start discussing the amounts, the relative speed of increase, and any other factors due to their planned level-up with each other. For at least 20 minutes. Every single freaking time. Don't get me wrong... a quick discussion about it isn't bad. But when the entier thing ping-pongs back and forth and slows the game by a good 30-45 minutes three or four times a session.... Ouch. :D --gleep
Dungeon_Master 01-08-04, 01:30 PM	Originally posted by Lord_Apollyon 211) The Oriental Adventures Guy The guy who is obsessed with L5R. He tries to play a OA monk from somewhere in a Faerun game, in the middle of the Sword Coast. And of course, he uses these :censored::censored::censored::censored: ing oriental names for a GREATSWORD!!! And he gets offended when we call his weapon by it's D&D name, and not the OA name for the exact same weapon. I HATE that type of player. With a passion...... At least mine isn't actually FROM the Kara-Tur, so maybe I'm lucky..... Update on "Fifty Cent". He recently told me his character is "THE 50 Cent". Who carries around a bazooka. :rolleyes:
StormKnight 01-08-04, 03:19 PM	204: "But I can do that in real life!" Player who gets angry when his character doesn't have the skill they need and argues that it's really simple, and since they (the player) can do it in real life their character should be able to as well. 216: "But...umm...I really can do that in real life!" The GM who refuses to let you do or makes you make absurdly hard rolls to accomplish things that just about anybody in the real world could do, much less characters who are highly skilled and trained. For example: A STR 30 odd character attempts to break open a perfectly normal interior door (modern setting) with a running start and doesn't even get a chance of doing it. I'm a weakling, and I've broken open an interior door like that.
The Master Weaver Is Warped 01-08-04, 03:42 PM	Originally posted by StormKnight 216: "But...umm...I really can do that in real life!" The GM who refuses to let you do or makes you make absurdly hard rolls to accomplish things that just about anybody in the real world could do, much less characters who are highly skilled and trained. For example: A STR 30 odd character attempts to break open a perfectly normal interior door (modern setting) with a running start and doesn't even get a chance of doing it. I'm a weakling, and I've broken open an interior door like that. Woops, this one belongs on the "What's a player to do?" thread, as 101 GM's to watch out for. Let's see which thread gets the most posts the fastest. You do the honors and start it off.
Northen_Spur 01-08-04, 11:03 PM	some of these might touch some of the already posted players to watch for. But might as well be creative. 217. The Jean-Luc Picard (I am guilty of playing that) The Pc chooses to be a member of an organization, that organization can do no harm and will refuse to belive his organization has caused harm. Dm: You see 2 harpers killing a man in the street Pc: Those aren't Harpers! The harper organization would never do that! Dm: unfortunatly the 2 members are reconised has knowed Harper. Pc: well Harper wouldn't do that, I declare them ex-harpers, they haved abondoned all of what the organization means. 218. The Catherine Janeway Belives in an organization and claims to follow it's rules, openly breaks them then hides behind them. Pc: The rules applies to everyone you hear! No un-nesseairy Killing in town we respect the laws of our city and try to be understanding of theirs Other Pc : Aye! DM: In the streets you see Baron Metus walking his dog... Pc: *Detects evil* I kill the evil Baron! DM: How do you justify killing the baron like that? Pc: Yeah well It was justified! *Turns to the others* Ok I was justified in doing that. But if I see anyone of you do that, I'll send him to the local prison! 219. The Benjamin Sisco I am the son of X diety, I expect, nee I demand they help me in my darkest hour. 220. The Capitain Kirk Send hundreds of followers to their death using his Charisma and leadership position to attract more. Might even put Fellow newbie Pc's in harms way. PC: I outfit all my followers with bright red clothing while I wear simple tan clothing. DM: There is a dragon destroying the country side. Pc: I will send wave after wave of My own men to destroy it, only I will have the right to the kill blow... And with other Pc's Pc: Ok long time members , Spook, Maclin ,Irish plus myself and the newest member victim X will try to solve the misterious attacks DM: you see a black sluge on the ground PC: Victim X being the new member you go and touch it DM: The black sluge kills Victim X *Sorry roll a new Character* PC: Defenitly a Black Puding 221. The Captain Archer PC: I tell the orc leader "We humans are a civilised race and we are trying to build a better world. Now we are not violent at all... well we might haved been in the past. DM: Grush refuses to talk PC: "Talk or I'll break every bone in your body in the most painfull way I know!" DM: Grush refuses to talk PC: I take a Maul and I shatter his left Leg DM: Your Lawfull Good this is the 8th time you done this PC: I don't care these orcs are driving me to madness!
Dungeon_Master 01-08-04, 11:29 PM	The General Custer: This player beleives he can overcome ANY challenge, and ussually bites off more than he can chew. Hence the name. The Nobel Peace nominee: He has no real goal for his character beyond "I want to do what I can to make the world a better place." This is ok, but it seems to be the motivation for EVERY character.
Bloodtide_the_Red 01-09-04, 12:28 AM	223. The penitaly over reacter guy This play over reacts whenever they take a pentaly to an ability they fell is important. If the character is a fighter, it will be strgenth, for example. As soon as they are hit by the first effect that takes their STR of 17 down to 15 they go off. Typical this guy sits back from the table and says 'I can't do anything, my strgenth is too weak'. No one can can get him to understand he is still twice as strong as the mage and can still do ok damage.. 224. The Rest Stop Guy this is the guy who, after every single fight, wants to rest. Even if it would take days they want to rest. No matter where they are or what they are doing...he wants to rest. 225. The great flawed plan guy This guy comes up with a great plan, something wonderous to defeat the bad guys....that has a huge flaw or hole in it. Example... The plan is to get the wizard close enuff to cast sleep on the Azer and have the rest of the party attack when it falls asleep. OR Player 'As I run around the corner a throw a bag of gold on the floor..when he stops to pick it up i'll attack' Or We dig a pit so they fall in it... BT
The_Dark_One 01-09-04, 12:56 AM	#226: Zap Brannigan: Similiar to Captain Kirk, this PC has no redeeming features.Stupid, lazy, selfish, and cowardly to the point where it becomes a religion. These guy take the "throw wave after wave of my own men at the problem" approach to heart. The other Pcs do the fighting and the dying. Then, and only then, the Zap Brannigan comes out to take all the credit and most of the treasure and some get away with it). This type also spout cliches (and just as oftent misquotes them). The type is often obseesed with the female NPCs and will go to dangerous and asinine lengths to impress them.
der_gogo 01-09-04, 06:07 AM	# 227: The "I compare everything to Star Trek" Sorry, had to take this one in :D
der_gogo 01-09-04, 06:07 AM	# 227: The "I compare anything to Star Trek" Sorry, had to take this one in :D
der_gogo 01-09-04, 06:07 AM	# 227: The "I compare everything to Star Trek" Sorry, had to take this one in :D
DracheSC 01-09-04, 06:07 PM	if these have been done ignore me #228 The easily Distracted This player is distracted by everything. He will stack his dice. Look at things around the house its being hosted at. Watch the tv and not pay attention. #229 Excuse Machine A player who seems so bored of DND he comes up with many stupid excuses not to come. I'v had a player call me 10 minutes before a campaign to say he got grounded for not going to mcdonalds or something...rediculous
ElFenrir 01-09-04, 06:34 PM	181. The Annoyingly Lucky Looks a lot like the cheater, but even when rolls are made in full view, it's still 20, 20, 20, 20, 20, max damage, max damage, save, save, save for none. We have a friend like this! No matter what dice are given to him, this guy just rolls frigging incredible. Characters that are 16-18s. Great HP. Great saves. And it happens often, in front of people, with definately legal, non weighted dice. We think he must have some sort of contract from below. :D
DracheSC 01-09-04, 08:38 PM	got another one #230 The no show This is the player who never shows up to campaigns because he always has work. The type of player who comes every other month and then complains that his character is weaker and should be powered up. Had many of these..often results in me kicking em or start a new
Teh Lurv 01-09-04, 11:03 PM	Comic Book Guy: Best thread Evar! In the same family as the Genre-Jumper and the Oriental Adventures Guy, I present: #231 The Setting-Anchored Player This player perfers one particular campaign setting above all others and roleplays his characters through the lens of that setting regardless of where the campaign is taking place. In his mind, all Halfings act like Kenders, all Humans are closed-minded and bigoted like in Ravenloft, etc. This player is highly resistant to other players or the DM attempting to convince him otherwise, going as far as accusing the rest of the group of "not role-playing said race or class correctly."
The Master Weaver Is Warped 01-11-04, 07:55 AM	#232 PMS This normally patient player, if game day hits the wrong part of her cycle, will bite the heads off players displaying any trait on this list. This carnage can be delayed by liberal amounts of chocolate, but if the endorphins wear off, even the evil DM takes two steps back from the table as she goes through the transformation to were-lynx and starts ripping out throats. She is easily set off by excessive noise or loud, off topic talking, as she now has the hearing of a cat. Beware if she is playing a rogue, TPK is a real possibility even if DM didn't plan it. "Sorry guys, I couldn't help myself. It's your own fault. If you had just stopped shaking the dice, and concentrated on the battle, not your inane testoterone competition about who's character could take out who's character, you might have heard my rogue before he did his 8d6 sneak attack, with the improved 2WF, +3 keen rapier, and +5 dagger. I didn't realize I would roll so high. Wow, can you believe that, three criticals with the rapier. Yeah, I know his threat range is 15-20, but still, if you hadn't been caught flat footed you might have survived. (See transformation here) :behold:NOW WE KNOW WHO'S CHARACTER CAN TAKE OUT WHO'S!!!:behold: (back to sweet thing she normally is) DM, I strip the bodies, go to town, sell their stuff, have a great meal with an excellent bottle of wine, a hot bath, and a massage."
Adlar Hodge 01-11-04, 08:17 AM	Great thread! I've either played in groups with, or ran games for, these stereotypes. I'll admit, I like playing arcane spellcasters/psionics,...so I don't quite consider myself as annoying as those that completely duplicate their former PCs. :)
Dungeon_Master 01-11-04, 01:07 PM	Originally posted by The Master Weaver Is Warped #232 PMS This normally patient player, if game day hits the wrong part of her cycle, will bite the heads off players displaying any trait on this list. This carnage can be delayed by liberal amounts of chocolate, but if the endorphins wear off, even the evil DM takes two steps back from the table as she goes through the transformation to were-lynx and starts ripping out throats. She is easily set off by excessive noise or loud, off topic talking, as she now has the hearing of a cat. Beware if she is playing a rogue, TPK is a real possibility even if DM didn't plan it. "Sorry guys, I couldn't help myself. It's your own fault. If you had just stopped shaking the dice, and concentrated on the battle, not your inane testoterone competition about who's character could take out who's character, you might have heard my rogue before he did his 8d6 sneak attack, with the improved 2WF, +3 keen rapier, and +5 dagger. I didn't realize I would roll so high. Wow, can you believe that, three criticals with the rapier. Yeah, I know his threat range is 15-20, but still, if you hadn't been caught flat footed you might have survived. (See transformation here) :behold:NOW WE KNOW WHO'S CHARACTER CAN TAKE OUT WHO'S!!!:behold: (back to sweet thing she normally is) DM, I strip the bodies, go to town, sell their stuff, have a great meal with an excellent bottle of wine, a hot bath, and a massage." :rofl: I will NOT comment or make a joke..... I will NOT comment or make a joke..... I will NOT comment or make a joke..... I will NOT comment or make a joke..... I will NOT comment or make a joke.....
Corinth 01-11-04, 08:32 PM	I request that there be some suggested methods for dealing with these problem players, such as the frequent use of "No, you don't." and then going on as if the offender said or did nothing.
Dungeon_Master 01-11-04, 09:58 PM	I don't have a name for it, but the player who does things just to annoy their DM. Even little things, but does them just to annoy the DM. Because even those little things can be annoying....
s4uc3m4n 01-12-04, 01:40 AM	233 Ignorant Concept Man DM : So tell me about your char... PC : He's a Ratling who Juggles Torches DM : These are High Elven Lands PC : He is with a traveling circus DM : That travels to High Elven lands? PC : Did I mention he is a monk and throw torches? DM : Why would he adventure with the party PC : He is looking for his Kappa Friends 234 It Just Came Out in Dragon Can I play the Metal Druid? My Next Char is gonna take the 15 attacks per round class. Radiant Servant of Pelor here I come. [B]235 But Dragon Says[/I] Similar to a rules lawyer, only he will find things said in a Dragon magazine to prove any points he can't. He knows the DC to jump from a Chair onto a table and then to attack off the nearby chandeler.
OmiKapSi 01-12-04, 04:17 AM	ouch, but I can be reformed. Guilty of too many of the above. I'm surprised that the following ones haven't shown up yet: #236 The Alcoholic Between adventures this character has one occupation. "I go to the tavern and get drunk." #237 The Parrot "I'm gonna cast (pause) magic missile." "We are the knights who say Ni!" "I'll be bahck." "Tis but a scratch." "Luke, I am your father." "Holy gibbering mouther batman!" And so on.... #238 The Creative One This one is definitely a love/hate. They always come up with ingenious ways to bypass/neutralize the challenge that was going to burn a whole bunch of party resources. It's always legit, although sometimes requires some GM adjudicating since people don't normally apply frozen acid in that way.
Addi83 01-12-04, 08:23 AM	Originally posted by OmiKapSi ouch, but I can be reformed. Guilty of too many of the above. I'm surprised that the following ones haven't shown up yet: #236 The Alcoholic Between adventures this character has one occupation. "I go to the tavern and get drunk." #237 The Parrot "I'm gonna cast (pause) magic missile." "We are the knights who say Ni!" "I'll be bahck." "Tis but a scratch." "Luke, I am your father." "Holy gibbering mouther batman!" And so on.... #238 The Creative One This one is definitely a love/hate. They always come up with ingenious ways to bypass/neutralize the challenge that was going to burn a whole bunch of party resources. It's always legit, although sometimes requires some GM adjudicating since people don't normally apply frozen acid in that way. Hehe I definately have elements of all these, also I am the "compares everything to startrek" player, only in reverse, since I compare startrek to DnD. Being creative drove my DM nuts during our first ever campaign. Wen he was running out of material, and wanted us to retreat to town and recuperate (we were low on HP and supplies, sure) instead of going further down a cave (actually a mine or something) we were in, he told us that we come upon a cavern and hear the movements of at least a few goblins, and immediately we get a volley of 12-16 arrows flying at us, but we can't see them very well, since we have torches and they have darkvision. Anyway, our intrepid 3. level characters charge ahead and somehow manage to kill all the goblins. Then the DM tells us that we hear a gong or alarm of some sort, and shortly afterwards, the movement of a lot of guys in armor, coming up a stairway which turns out was from the main barracks. The stairway is rather steep and narrow, so I ask him if there are any boulders around... a surprised "yes, why not" and one big rolling boulder later, we've sent a lot of guys in armor to the infirmary, or to the great goblin hideout in the sky. At this point the DM admitted that he was out of material, and politely asked us to go back to town.
Goblin-Crunch Cerial 01-12-04, 09:13 AM	239: Dude-you-so-whipped This poor player has a very long standing significant other (wife/girlfriend) that insists on calling every 30 minutes telling the player how much she luvs him, misses him, and on the way home to pick up a bag of cat food. 240: Don’t-worry-you-have-a-Con-of-16 (True story). A fellow player gets tossed into a river and can’t swim for flip. As he’s trying to get out of his chain shirt he calls for help. Our Paladin states, “Dude, don’t worry- you have a Con of 16, you can be under water for 2 minutes, that’s 20 turns.” He then runs off to kill some more were-rats. 241: I-must-have-a-better-axe Usually a barbarian but it can be other classes: The player is so consumed with a single weapon they will do everything to gain a more powerful version. Many times these players are obsessed with MDO (maximum damage output) that they often succumb to any and all forms of munchankism just to get >30 damage points. 242: The-selective-rules-lawyer (O’woe to the DM with this player) This expert rules lawyer knows 95% of all D&D rules. This person also has an innate ability of correcting any and all rule inconsistencies as long as it is in their favor. When it’s not… 243: What-time-do-we-to-meet Not exactly a single player but the actual group itself. No mater how much you beg, threaten, or bribe… your group of players can never arrive on time. It is always someone who’s at least an hour late. 244: Hey-lets-go-to-the-geek-fest-and-make-a-quick-buck Gather your skank-girlfriends and head to the nearest Con to make quick buck. Why? All gamers are sex starved-looooooosers that would pay good money for a little action. Fellow Con patron: DUDE! Is it true that she’ll have sex for a hundred bucks? Me: Yeah I guess so… Fellow Con patron: That is soo cool… Me: Man, there isn’t enough DDT in this world to make that :cookie: right. Save your money for Magic Cards… Fellow Con patron: Oh yeah…right. :twitch:
Raist27m 01-12-04, 09:17 AM	Originally posted by gleep 215: The Resonating Countdowning Statmonkeys This type of player is okay on his or her own but when there are two or more they can be pretty irritating. Every time the DM hands out experience they will calculate exactly how much more they need to level and loudly proclaim the amount. If there's more than one, they will start discussing the amounts, the relative speed of increase, and any other factors due to their planned level-up with each other. For at least 20 minutes. Every single freaking time. Don't get me wrong... a quick discussion about it isn't bad. But when the entier thing ping-pongs back and forth and slows the game by a good 30-45 minutes three or four times a session.... Ouch. :D --gleep Dude. You just made me spew Mountain Dew out my nose. Simply based on the title. You forgot to mention that they discuss how much kEWler their characters will be with a BAB one higher, a spell that will stack with such-and-such other spells, and a mighty negaika +2 that they'll finally be able to use because they'll have the appropriate STR bonus.
Darkash_The_Holy 01-12-04, 11:36 AM	Now i can see how if most of these things are done by players who have played for 10+ years or somthing then that could be bad, but damn most of the listed traits sound a lot like somthing everyone here was at one point in time NEW, omg i said ya you were all new at one point, Mabey some of you picked it up after your first session mabey it took a few of you a few days to learn how to do combat and then worked on refining your RPing skills. Now while you might have come out of the womb knowing how to create a 5 page character backstory and know how to create a balanced original character that still fits in the game your playing, But most people cant maey some people are still trying to learn how to play and cant remeber to add their str to there bab or whatever, Who cares that they have been playing for 9 months or 9 years They are trying to learn a game that you love and have probably spent way to much time playing/thinking about [Iknow i have] Now i may not be the best roleplayer and i know i fit some of the listed traits on any given day, I would also say that everyone here also fits at least a few of the traits. Now if this is all in good fun then great, But i have played with far to many people who refuse to cut the new guy/girl some slack and expet them to know what to do. Also no i am not bitter about my first expericene playing D&D i think i picked it up very fast.
Dungeon_Master 01-12-04, 11:43 AM	Originally posted by Goblin-Crunch Cerial 244: Hey-lets-go-to-the-geek-fest-and-make-a-quick-buck Gather your skank-girlfriends and head to the nearest Con to make quick buck. Why? All gamers are sex starved-looooooosers that would pay good money for a little action. Fellow Con patron: DUDE! Is it true that she’ll have sex for a hundred bucks? Me: Yeah I guess so… Fellow Con patron: That is soo cool… Me: Man, there isn’t enough DDT in this world to make that :cookie: right. Save your money for Magic Cards… Fellow Con patron: Oh yeah…right. :twitch: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: 245. "This Sucks! I Don't Want to Hear It!" Ok, so, you've spent a nice amount of time planning out and setting up a short cinimatic-ish scene between two important NPCs. Ok, maybe it IS sort of a romance/talk scene, but nothing "mature thinktank" worthy. And one of them WILL say something that'll be important later in the game. They're talking, and what do you hear? "Hey, this is lame! Besides, you haven't rolled to see if I'm drunk yet!" (annoyed) "He takes her in his arms, but as he does, he is overcome by a vision-" "Am I drunk yet?! This is lame!" (grrrrr..........) "He almost drops her as he's overcome by a vision of-" "DARN IT! THIS IS STUPID MAN! IT SUCKS!" (VERY annoyed) "A vision of armies moving through the Dalelands. She looks up at him, whispering "What's wrong?" He answers, his voice a hoarse whisp-" "This. Is. So. :censored: ing. Lame." "HIS VOICE A HOARSE WHISPER, he answers "Nothing."" "Dude. This is so stoopid." "WELL YOU'RE THE ONE ALWAYS ASKING, "HEY, DM, CAN I :consored: A BARMAID?"! AND I LISTEN. I DON'T SAY, "DUDE, THATS SO LAME!". I LISTEN TO THE STUPID :censored: AND ROLL THE :censored: ING DICE TO SEE HOW DRUNK YOU ARE. AND YOU CAN'T EVEN SIT THROUGH THIS SCENE......." *long pause* "So am I drunk yet or what?" Another player: "Ok, I come out of the trees into the clearing where they are so they don't do anything. Cause, er, I don't want her to kiss him or anything." "Who said they were going to do that? Hur hur hur........." BANGBANGBANGBANGBANG! (sound of my head hitting the table)
Lord T Hawkeye 01-12-04, 11:44 AM	243: What-time-do-we-to-meet Not exactly a single player but the actual group itself. No mater how much you beg, threaten, or bribe… your group of players can never arrive on time. It is always someone who’s at least an hour late.[/B] Ugh...I live in an entire city of that. When people here say they'll be at point A at 2 o'clock, that means they'll just start thinking about getting ready at 2 o'clock. Someone says they'll call tomorrow at noon? It's not a comitment on their part at all, just a loose guidline. And I'm a very reliable person. I say I'm going to do something, I WILL do it. No two ways about it. So for obvious reasons, people here drive me insane. >< Is it any wonder that I hope to move in the near future?
gleep 01-12-04, 12:22 PM	And, thus, was it demonstrated... #246 The Antagonistic Monkey-Reflex Self-Appointed Defender of Someone Else's Problem They always have a few points in their argument, but manage to throw out so much usesless emotional garbage that their good points are often lost in the depths of anger smothered in a Holier-than-Thou attitude. Their misguided attempts at a well-meant cause often create more havok than the problem they attempt to protect nameless others (but never themselves!) from... much less if the problem actually existed before they decided to castigate others on its behalf. :D --gleep
Twisted Puppy 01-12-04, 12:46 PM	Originally posted by The Master Weaver Is Warped #232 PMS This normally patient player, if game day hits the wrong part of her cycle, will bite the heads off players displaying any trait on this list. This carnage can be delayed by liberal amounts of chocolate, but if the endorphins wear off, even the evil DM takes two steps back from the table as she goes through the transformation to were-lynx and starts ripping out throats. She is easily set off by excessive noise or loud, off topic talking, as she now has the hearing of a cat. Beware if she is playing a rogue, TPK is a real possibility even if DM didn't plan it. "Sorry guys, I couldn't help myself. It's your own fault. If you had just stopped shaking the dice, and concentrated on the battle, not your inane testoterone competition about who's character could take out who's character, you might have heard my rogue before he did his 8d6 sneak attack, with the improved 2WF, +3 keen rapier, and +5 dagger. I didn't realize I would roll so high. Wow, can you believe that, three criticals with the rapier. Yeah, I know his threat range is 15-20, but still, if you hadn't been caught flat footed you might have survived. (See transformation here) :behold:NOW WE KNOW WHO'S CHARACTER CAN TAKE OUT WHO'S!!!:behold: (back to sweet thing she normally is) DM, I strip the bodies, go to town, sell their stuff, have a great meal with an excellent bottle of wine, a hot bath, and a massage." :bigeyes: Now, if I had not been married for going on 20 years the above would have really frightened me... OK, so it really frightened me anyway, and I'm the evil DM... *making mental note to call PMS player's hubby and ask when I need to make sure I'm not within arm's length during a session* Edit: DM's reply: " When you get to the town, you find it abandoned- however, there is a hot bath drawn, a fine lasagna kept warm in a dutch oven, fresh pastries out, and a selection of wine bottles - all left by the fleeing villagers in hopes of delaying pursuit until they can reach the BBEG's lair and swear obeisance in return for his protection..."
maxvan68 01-13-04, 08:06 PM	# 247: Players obsessed with searching: ME: You're in a room. It appears to be empty. PC: I'm going to search for secret doors or trapdoors. There may be treasure hidden somewhere. ME: (Roll dice, even though there were no secret doors or trapdoors in the room) You find nothing. PC: I'm going to search again. ME: (Rolls dice again) Nothing. PC: I'm going to search again. (The rest of the PCs are rolling their eyes.) ME: (Rolls dice agan) Nothing. PC: I'm going to search again. There has to be something somwhere in this room. ME: (Getting tired of this) Nothing. There is nothing to find. PC: I'm going to search again. ME: THERE'S NOTHING. THERE'S NOTHING TO FIND IN THE ROOM. LET'S MOVE ON. (They go into another room.) PC: I'm going to search ... There must be a secret door or hidden treasure around here somewhere ... (The other PC's and I groan ...) # 248: Players who cheat by claiming they did things AFTER THE FACT: ME: The troll does (rolls dice) 25 points of damage to you. (Looking at PC sheet) Since you had only 17 hit points before the battle, you're unconscious now, with negative 8 hit points. PC: No wait. I actually have 45 hit points. So I still have 20. ME: How do you have 45 hit points? PC: I drank a potion of extra healing right before the battle started. ME: When did you have time to do that? PC: I did it right before the battle started, right after I saw the trolls. I said I was doing it. (Looks around at the other PCs) Didn't I tell him I was drinking a potion of extra-healing? (The other PCs reluctantly nod.) ME: I don't remember you saying anything about that ... PC: (Starting to pout and argue) I did. I promise you. ME: OK, All right. You still have 20 hit points left ... OR: PC (A rogue): I'm searching the statue for traps. ME: (Rolls dice, and it shows that a trap was triggered): All of a sudden, a dagger protrudes from the statue, slashing your hand for (rolls dice) 6 points of damage. You also have to roll a saving throw versus poison ... PC: Uh, I had my gauntlets on. There's no way it could have slashed my hand. ME: What? How could you have had your gauntlets on? PC: I told you before I started searching the trap, that I was putting my gauntlets on. Didn't I (looking around at the other PCs)? (They reluctantly nod.) PC: See? ME: I can't believe this. How could you possibly search a statue for traps WITH YOUR FREAKING GAUNTLETS ON??? How is that possible? PC: (Starts to pout and argue) You just don't like my character. You're trying to kill him off. ME: ALL RIGHT! You had your gauntlets on! You don't suffer any damage!
kappa_nova7 01-13-04, 10:45 PM	#248 the fighting elf wizard. The charecter with pure levels in wizard, who believes that because he has autamatic proficiency in a longsword he is a combat machine #249 the short sighted wizard The wizard who only ever uses fireball, invisibility, fly & lightning bolt. He or she will always use fire bolt (even if freindlies are in the way.) unless facing a fire immune creature.
Sun Stealer 01-13-04, 10:54 PM	#250: "If I'm not god, then my character sucks" This player will bring every "Quintessential" and other 3rd party book ever made to games, pointing to things in them and asking for them, after you say repeatedly, "Core only." PC: Can have a bonded weapon? DM: No PC: Come on, why not? DM: Because it's overpowered PC: No it isn't and anyway, you wanted roleplaying, this helps roleplaying DM: How? PC: I can be a paladin with a bonded weapon DM: Is the weapon intelligent? PC: No, why? DM: Then how does it help roleplaying? PC: How many paladins are there that wield bonded weapons? DM: :confused:
Veton 01-17-04, 02:46 PM	#251: The DM's "Helper" Maybe you're new to DMing. Maybe your players finished up an adventure, and there's still time left in the session. Or maybe you just aren't prepared. Whatever it is, you don't have a good idea for a possible plot hook. The "Helper" attempts to help. While this is a good thing, the methods used...aren't. The "Helper" will break into the castle, and steal from the treasury. He'll threaten random people if he doesn't like what they're doing. After selecting a house, he'll go in, march up to the resident, and attempt to blackmail him of some crime that the resident might have possibly commited, even if there's no proof. If it's illegal, unmoral, and just plain weird, you can bet the "Helper" will try it.
Goblin-Crunch Cerial 01-19-04, 08:10 AM	(A spin off from Veton) 252: The-player-who-can't-let-go-that-he-once-DM'ed This player's not exactly a bad player just one who has borderline control issues. The game will be going fine but during the adventure a rule application will come into play. Players will voice their concern and then the DM will make a decision. Later that day the player will call up and subtly explain how they'd have done it. They will also break into discussion on "little" things about yoru campaign. NOTE: This is nothing more than subtle manipulation from they player trying to shape your adventures into something more into thier image.
Gunton the Terrible 01-19-04, 03:41 PM	#253 - Parollee The player who wants to play, but their wife/husband/significant other constantly makes "plans" for them to elimate their chance of playing or to cut it short. Sessions with them usually end an hour early when they sheepishly announce they are expected to be back home now. #254 - Who-am-I? This player forgets their own character's name. DM: Initive 11, Zorgon. What do you want to do. Bob (a.k.a. Zorgon): - DM: Zorgon, who do you want to attack? Bob: -- DM: BOB! Bob: Is it my turn? #255 - Too-much-on-their-plate-player They constantly arrive 30 minutes late and fall asleep 20 minutes after they arrive.
Veton 01-19-04, 10:10 PM	Originally posted by Neja Masachora #111: The "Custom Race" Character <SNIP> PC: I want a hellfire elf! They live underground and have black skin and can cast Hellball at will! Me: How about a fire elf? They're almost identical... although they can't use epic magic like that. Would that work? PC: No. DM:Okay, you can play a hellfire elf. Player: Whoo-hoo! Later DM: You see a gnoll. Player: I cast Hellball! DM:Okay, you take 10d6 points of damage and die :smirk: Originally posted by Goblin-Crunch Cerial (A spin off from Veton) Awsome! I've been spun off from! :D #266 The quitter This sort of player ALWAYS needs help doing even the easiest quest. Heck, he needs help tying his shoelaces. In order to get this kind of help, he'll bug all of the members of his guild until he is thrown out. Even then, he stays near the entrance and begs for help. When it becomes obvious that the tactic won't work, he goes off to the nearest tavern and cries while drinking, hoping some NPC will take pity on him and offer help. If he's expected to do anything by himself, he whines, even if he could win in mere seconds. "What? I have to fight both these gnolls by myself? That's not faaaaaaaaiiiir! I'm only level 14!" When the DM has an NPC help him, he annoys the heck out of them, until a Chaotic Good person becomes Chaotic Neutral from just having to be around him. Then they eventually turn to Chaotic Evil and run off, causing him to whine some more when he found out they stole his equipment. When the DM is able to find other people to play with, they eventually all become Evil just so that they can kill him. Sad thing is, this is a true story. Luckily I didn't have to suffer from this, it was a former player of my DM.
Tekklas V' Netherell 01-20-04, 12:35 PM	No. 227 : the multi-roller This character just DOES NOT GET that you may only make a roll ONCE! example: "Make a reflex save" (Roll) "3. Damn. Wait a sec." (Roll) "17, all right! now we're talkin!" "You fail" "What!? i rolled a 17!" "No, you rolled a 3. youy DID roll a 17, but it wasn't for any reason." "aw, c'mon" "no." "Please?" "NO! jeez..."
HarmMaster2003 01-20-04, 06:09 PM	Ok, stop me if you've head this one before. 228: The teen-angst half-vampire: Obsessed with "daywalkers" and "dhampiels." Always wears black, usually uses katanas and diatos. Probably named "D." D: Ok, I'm in this town. I'm mad because humans abused my human mother. DM: Why are you adventuring with humans? In human lands? D: Ahh... becasue. Hey, mayor! Anything strange going on? Mayor: Something like vampiric phenomenon. I have no idea what that might be about. D: Father?!? Paladin player: Umm... I cast detect evil. Not a player, but a DM: The why-didn't-you-win DM. "I'm going to give you awesome magical items and EQ, then beat you to death with goblins. You won't die, you'll live just so that I can beat you into the ground again. I'm going to kill you with goblins. I'll kill you with the *same* goblins." Note: I heard this while in the process of adding my post. Some DMs just can't get over the idea that they *can* kill the players at any time they want to, the trick is to bring them as close to death as possible, then get them to esacpe.
Hengwrt Ellesmere 01-20-04, 06:39 PM	#229. The player who can't stop laughing about something that happened in game that no one else thinks is that funny #230. The player who tries to make #229 stop laughing by wrestling with him Note that #229 is also very ticklish, so #230 is only making matters worse. This was around one in the morning while my parents were trying to sleep upstairs (I think we were in junior-high then). #229 finally stopped laughing when he started to pass out from hyperventilation. #131 The male player who insists on playing a female character and flirting with the other male players' characters Not only did this make some people uncomfortable, but it was really hard to look past the fact that the guy was 300 pounds and hadn't bathed in a while. Some senses just can't be overcome no matter how hard you roleplay. #132 The female player who wants to play out her recent fight with her boyfriend (not currently playing with us) in the game between her character and an NPC detailed in her background. This would be fun and a constructive use of roleplaying for angstful teenagers, if not for the fact that she kept making up with her boyfriend and then getting in another fight with him faster than I could plan out the NPCs actions. And she got mad at me when it didn't work out realistically (or ideally, depending on her mood that session). #133 Same female player who later started dating a guy in the gaming group and proceded to break up and make up with him at least once between each session. #134 and 135 Pair of brothers trying to out-munchkin each other as the most overpowered character, yet they back each other up whenever I say one of them can't do something that would ruin and encounter or plotline. This was in White Wolf, and they had EVERY clan/tribe/kith book published and insisted that I not deviate from any historical or setting information contained therein (even though White Wolf intentionally writes contradictions into their world to heighten the mystery).
Otto the Bugbear 01-20-04, 10:03 PM	This is fun. Since I qualify for a few, I figured I'd add one to the mix. (Sorry if this one has already been covered, but it's #1 on top of my list.) #236 - I go off alone, what happens/do I discover? This is the guy that does help out the party and generally speaking sticks together. However, once a night -- or once a game, or once an hour -- he feels the need to have his character wander off without the rest of the party. Doesn't matter if he's in a dungeon, the city, or the middle of the wilderness. True story. Group: Okay, it's getting late so we find a campsight, set up out tents, cook dinner, and do other end-of-the-day things. One thing that happens is two members of the party get into a rather heated discussion. (Which was okay this time. It was a my god is better than your god arguement, which the characters would go round and round about.) During the course of the arguement, the wanderer player gets his feelings hurt, or loses the arguement. No matter the cause, he gets up in the morning and wanders off in a different direction from the rest of the party. No problem. Sometimes characters retire from groups and this seemed like an appropriate time considering the patron deity conflict. I'm thinking he wanted to bring in a new character. How wrong I was. The rest of the adventure continues, and he wants me to run another adventure that just covers his character and what he's doing. :rolleyes: Turned out okay in the end. Because I'm not afraid to speak my peace, I told him that I wasn't going to run two campaigns. He gave me his character, rolled up a new one, and I got a nice NPC with some history concerning the PCs. The real problem lies in the fact that it's the same guy over and over. Cheers Otto :)
Light Dragon 03-26-05, 05:02 PM	#136 Insists on Playing a Female (He's a Guy) While I have no objection to this idea in and of itself... the reason he wants to play it isbecuase he believes that he'll get 'discounts' and special treatments in game. We have explained to him that this is not the case (Especially with 11 charisma) and that It could become awkward later in the game... Also he seems to think this is a 'joke' character to some degree. (Thank G-d that we talked him out of playing a japanese schoolgirl transported back to D&D world) ...we're desparate for players, thus we have to deal with this trash. #137 Poke My Nose In Investigates everything. Even when it's not in his character's best interest- and yet thinks he's the greatest roleplayer ever :rolleyes:
Light Dragon 03-26-05, 05:10 PM	#131 The male player who insists on playing a female character and flirting with the other male players' characters Not only did this make some people uncomfortable, but it was really hard to look past the fact that the guy was 300 pounds and hadn't bathed in a while. Some senses just can't be overcome no matter how hard you roleplay. I feel your pain. ...awkward... and my player's girlfriend told him that she was upset and a bit worried by his choice... and yet he ignored her and INSISTED on playing a female!
General_Ridley 03-26-05, 05:40 PM	138. me can RP any scenario perfectly under a given alignment and set of circumstances (such as exalted character or vile character) and is otherwise completely unpredictable and impossible to properly plan a campaign for.
happymoocow 03-26-05, 05:50 PM	139: Mr. Bling bling. His characters wear platinum bling bling. Everything he has is dedicated to looking nice and shiny. Nice thistle armor (+1 ac and +10 max dex bonus with 0 ASF), shield, and weapon. Ring of sustenence and that's it... and he's a sorcerer. Yep, he doesn't want to get dirty and rarely uses his nice and shiny items. No you can't borrow them. It's just there to make him look nice. All his stuff he carries is magical. He's all about "pimping" his stuff out. Oh yeah and this guy is a skinny white dude that listens to 50 cent. His characters are black. Out of character and in character he'll act black. He calls everyone his *****.
green_yawgmoth 03-26-05, 06:23 PM	240: "Can I have this?" Asks the DM for things to show up in game, or be able to buy them. Almost always, these are extremely powerful items that are almost if not entirely tailored to his race/class/alignment. Usually likes to play with new DMs just to abuse their lack of experience. http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v91/yawgmoth/kittyjig.gif
AramilWindwalker 03-26-05, 08:50 PM	210) The Dex Monkeys Usually ties into 203. The people who can't go anywhere without their gloves of dex +6, their belt of agility +6, their amulet of dex +6, their full plate of dex +6, their greatsword of dex +6, and their underwear of dex +6. They usually will make up for it by neglecting their con, int, cha, and wis, so they have 10 hp at level 5, have trouble beating a head of cabbage in a game of checkers, and couldn't convince an avatar of a deity that their deity likes them. And they complain about how they can't add their dex to hit for greatswords, and about how they always seem to be almost dying when they get hit by something. Very guilty(but where do you buy undies of dex+6), previously, but i've been cured (clerics in brestplate with 18str and cha are so much better) How for my own we're on 241 The ugly fool No matter how much role-playing and social interaction(or undead), this character always has the 4 or 6 in charisma(even if a cleric), and gets really annoyed when he can't convince a merchant to reduce the price or something. Also tends to have low intelligence/wisdom but phenomenal physical stats. I know too many of them. You do not give a cleric 6 charisma in a dungeon full of fetid dead creatures. it's just dumb. I am so annoyed by a group of three clerics where none of them could effectively scare away a skeleton, nevermind the specters we are fighting. So I have vowed to at least have 14 cha when i play a good cleric
Newbie to D&D 03-26-05, 11:46 PM	242) "DM power abuse" If anything starts to go wrong, one of my players always calls it "DM power abuse". Him and the cleric (level 3) were fighting a wolverine, and he kept rolling low. He calls it DM power abuse. When they are level 10 they fight a succubus. It kisses him and, of course he fails his will save. This goes on for a while while the party members try to get to him (they were at the other end of the hall). Of course, its not a bad will save, its "DM power abuse". There are more but i can't remember them.
High Octane 03-28-05, 11:53 AM	Im guessing with the numbers here #243 The drunk. Not a drunken character, a drunken PLAYER. Every session, OUT COMES THE VODKA!! As the night goes on, his character starts acting dumber and dumber and the guy is being completely serious.
windquake 03-28-05, 01:46 PM	The Neutral Player... The player that thinks just because "Neutral" is in their alignment, they have to be balanced with everything. (ie: for every "good" deed, they must perform an "evil" one, for every time they break a law, they must abide by the law completely...) Most idiotic true example: The party of 5 runs up against 4 Ogres. The "Neutral" hangs back and doesn't fight because 5 against 4 is unbalanced. -Windquake
green_yawgmoth 03-28-05, 02:02 PM	The Neutral Player... The player that thinks just because "Neutral" is in their alignment, they have to be balanced with everything. (ie: for every "good" deed, they must perform an "evil" one, for every time they break a law, they must abide by the law completely...) Most idiotic true example: The party of 5 runs up against 4 Ogres. The "Neutral" hangs back and doesn't fight because 5 against 4 is unbalanced. -Windquake Of course, to remedy this, play a N_ or _N cleric. Bring someone back to life with ressurection or the like, then say "And now, by your logic, someone has to die. *Destruction*" :smirk: http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v91/yawgmoth/kittyjig.gif
Andrakis 03-28-05, 06:08 PM	The Bookie They'v been playing for awhile, and they know all the rules but still they just cant help but look up the most usless things "oh I didnt know you can pull out a spell component while in a grappel" "magic missile does 1d4??" "druids a class???" Oh man I've got me one of those... Can't they just learn the rules :( ?
Jinn Tydo 03-28-05, 07:05 PM	#244(?) The "I've Done it" Guy The guy who attempts crazy martial arts moves in combat or disagrees with how much damage his katana/longsword/other weapon does, citing that "I've done it". His belief is that swinging sticks around in his back yard makes him and his character teh uber ninj4z. Example: Teh Guy: Okay, I want to run up to him, punch him in the bicep and then grab his arm and throw him over me then punch him in the throat when he hits the ground. Me: That's like four attacks. Teh Guy: Nuh-uh, I've done it, it's like three seconds. Me: Or four attacks. Which... (looks at character sheet) You don't have.
orcslayer 03-28-05, 07:56 PM	250. the guy who insisists on his character being **** raped.
High Octane 03-29-05, 10:12 AM	#25..........know what, I dont have a clue about the #. "It MUST be important....." A combination of the metagame thinker and the paranoid player, this player believes that everything the DM mentions must be important just because he mentioned it. DM: All that happens that day of ANY note is an eagle flies over your head. PC: I track it! I bet its some wizard's familiar or some druid's animal companion or its a polymorphed silver dragon! DM: The eagle had a note in its mouth. It drops it. PC: I pick it up! WHat does it say? DM: "Sometimes an eagle is just an eagle you moron. -DM"
AntiDjinn 07-19-05, 09:41 PM	I was at Comicon here in San Diego this past week and did a little bit of open gaming. Unfortunately I ran across no less than 4 of #73 woefully hygienically challenged. What is with these people and conventions. I can't imagine they are like that 24/7. Is a toothbrush and some deodorant too much to pack? It just supports the stereotype of gamers as being socially clueless.
SwitchUK 07-20-05, 07:58 AM	Teh Guy: Okay, I want to run up to him, punch him in the bicep and then grab his arm and throw him over me then punch him in the throat when he hits the ground. Me: That's like four attacks. Teh Guy: Nuh-uh, I've done it, it's like three seconds. Me: Or four attacks. Which... (looks at character sheet) You don't have. Well handled. #253-odd: The Cheeto Ninja Big, fat, smelly. Fingers stained orange from snack foods, XXXXXXXL Metallica T-shirt obliterated by endless stretches of cola stains and other, less pleasent (or even identifiable) stuff... DEX 20 halfling rogue with Combat Finesse. #254-ish: The Sauron wannabe. Isn't happy unless his character is about eight feet tall and wears full plate +3 at the very least. Refuses to play any other kind of character whatsoever.