can girls and boys play together [Archive] - Wizards Community

can girls and boys play together [Archive] - Wizards Community

Post/Author/DateTime Post
ECOM
11-22-04, 11:42 PM I am curently dm for a group of player 4 boys age 12-14 (my brother and some of his frends) the game is going good and the boys are starting to become better roll players. We have been playing at my house for the past year and now my daugter and one of her frends (both age 9) have expressed interest in playing. Im not sure if i should mix the two together. The boys have a tendency to act like teenage boys and are a little bit uncontrolable. I am not sure i want to submit the girls to this (i already have parental permition for both girls).

Does anyone have any thoughts on the matter?
Morwen
11-22-04, 11:47 PM I suggest you try it out for a couple of sessions, and if it doesn't work out (Knowing boys in that age, I wouldn't have too high hopes :() you can start up a separate game for the two girls. That might work better either way due to the age difference.
Board_Rider
11-22-04, 11:50 PM Yeah, try it out...couldn't hurt..may be fun.
Draco Strang
11-22-04, 11:52 PM If it were my group, I would split the two. I'm willing to bet that the boys want to kill things, get treasure, and become half dragons.

I also bet the girls want to be sprites and nixies, and save candyland from the evil wolf.

No,I'm not gendertyping, I speak from personal experience, had the same problem when i was 12 and a girl our age wanted to play.

Play two games, you'll be all the happier for it.
eshadowe
11-22-04, 11:59 PM I suggest seperating the group just based on age basically. I actually very much like a mixed group, but I believe with the age difference the two groups will have different motives and desires. It'd be like having that same group of of boys play with a group of players in there early 20's.

BUT it'd suggest that the two groups hear the tales of what the others do as your bar tales, this will make it so the groups aren't totally seperate, and maybe have one players or a group do a cameo in the others games. That way both groups can do what they want, develop into the group they want and be able to 'interact' once in a while.
green_yawgmoth
11-23-04, 12:00 AM Why not find out what the girls want to play before stereotyping them into Little Orphan Annies?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v91/yawgmoth/kittyjig.gif
Neerie
11-23-04, 12:02 AM At that age, even the smallest difference is a big difference, so even if just for the age "gap" I'd keep them separated. The boys will act like teenagers, because they are, the girls on the other hand, are still kids there.

Oh and one thing that made me laugh in the original post:
the boys are starting to become better roll players
Considering that this is a role playing game, using lots of die rolls, I found it funny, even if it was just a small mistake (and probably because it's midnight).
ThatDarnCat
11-23-04, 01:02 AM In my experience boys and grrrls of equal age do OK, but that is too big a gap. Running a seperate game for the grrrls would be the best bet. Just don't dumb it down. It's one thing to make the plots simple and easy to follow, but use all the rules as they are. Just be prepared to spend lots of time explaining everything several times.
Felonious Monk
11-23-04, 02:56 AM I'm running an occasional campaign for my cousin, his three kids (two girls 12 and 8, and a 10 year old boy), and my girlfriend. It can best be described as chaotic...

I think you are probably a good judge of how well the boys will deal with the girls. Would the boys help the girls out, or would they (metaphorically) elbow them out of the way? You should have a decent idea of how well they would work together (If I'm reading your post correctly, one of the boys is one of the girls' uncle - they're related, anyway).

You could introduce the girls to the game separately - maybe a one-shot where they have their own adventure together - before introducing them to the larger party. Introducing them could even be an opportunity for more roleplaying, or to separate role-playing from personal opinions. If one of the boys is a Cleric or Paladin, the responsibility of the class makes a good welcome a necessity.

I'd give it a shot. With a double shot of patience. Don't forget, six is much harder than four, even if they're all experienced roleplayers.

Good Luck!
Tytalus
11-23-04, 04:30 AM You could introduce the girls to the game separately - maybe a one-shot where they have their own adventure together - before introducing them to the larger party.

That's the way to go. As they gain some experience roleplaying and get more comfortable with the whole process, they'll be much better prepared for the other group.

This way you also don't have to slow the boy's game down explaining rules etc. to the girls.

Another aspect to this is to have the girl choose characters complementary to the boys'. Then, after joining the two groups, throw challenges at them where each one has an opportunity to shine (always a good thing). Ideally, the combined group will learn to depend on each other.
Zagan
11-23-04, 04:36 AM maybe try explaining the situation to the boys to be a litle more mature.
Otherwise i'd give it a try.
Zao Fato
11-23-04, 05:02 AM I agree with all the rest of them, either play two different campaigns, or do a one nighter with the girls and see if they even like it first, and if they are ok, then see if it is worth joining the two groups.

I DM for 6, including my girlfriend, tha other 5 are guys, and I find that, her idea's are always left out on occassion. And as she is the healer, she is expected to heal all the time.

Guys and Girls, can Roleplay together, but it may take time. And at that age, it might even put the boys off Roleplaying
Black Kitten
11-23-04, 07:49 AM I DM for 6, including my girlfriend, tha other 5 are guys, and I find that, her idea's are always left out on occassion. And as she is the healer, she is expected to heal all the time.

I am currently without GF, but that is exactly the reason why my ex-gf's always had some powerfull firework/greatsword instead of a healer's robe when joining the party. The party wouldn't venture into melee without them.
EatFlan
11-23-04, 09:52 AM while conceptually pleasant the threat of a staph-cooties transfer is far to great to ignore.

delousing is recommended at regular intervals.
On_the_wings_of_TPK
11-23-04, 10:58 AM while conceptually pleasant the threat of a staph-cooties transfer is far to great to ignore.

delousing is recommended at regular intervals.

Thats just uncalled for. Dude, get a life.

For the OP, You rock dude. Get'm hooked while their young. My group is 7 strong. I have one casual player and the rest are regulars. The gender break down is 2 females to 5 males. The age range is 16, or is she 17, to 25. Depending on the amount of work you want to do anything is possible, I'd just figure out what everyone wantys and see what you can do to enclude it. Boys can be half dragons and get loot while helping the girls save candy land from the evil wolf, if that is the case. In any event just make sure everyone is having fun, that is is point after all.

Cheers.
EatFlan
11-23-04, 11:25 AM i'm not the one living in a small dark hole.
PaladinKD
11-23-04, 11:42 AM i'm not the one living in a small dark hole.
My hole is extradimensional, quite roomy and has an everburning torch! I'll send you the blueprints if you'd like TPK! :help: :tongue:
FriendoftheDork
11-23-04, 07:20 PM Now if the girls are as interested in roll playing as the boys, it should be fine. Just make sure you make some house rules about what references to be made etc. (for example no sexual stuff).

If, however the girls really want to roleplay I think this situation may cause the girls to never want to play an RPG again.. that should be avoided. So find out what they want.
On_the_wings_of_TPK
11-23-04, 07:27 PM My hole is extradimensional, quite roomy and has an everburning torch! I'll send you the blueprints if you'd like TPK! :help: :tongue:
:heehee :heehee :rofl:

Cheers!
Cymraegmorgan
11-23-04, 07:34 PM When I was a teenager we had a mixed group, not quite as many girls, until my two cousins(both girls of 10) wanted to learn to play. It slowed play down a little, but otherwise we had lots of fun and no problems.
Kainy
11-23-04, 08:02 PM In general, I would not advise mixing 12 yo. boys with 9 yo. girls. However, I don't personally know the kids, and they may, for all I know, be well-adjusted, mature for their age, and perfectly capable of handling it. For instance, I know a 14 yo. who, if you didn't know it, would seem like they were a senior in high school. So anything's possible, but I'd have to know the kids to give you a terribly valid opinion.

Also, EatFlan, again, I note your posts having no value whatsoever (even comedic), and humbly request that you stop putting them on the boards. You can get your moment of personal glee just by imagining that you posted them, and then move on, leaving the rest of us in peace. I think it would work out as well or better for all involved parties.
BW0222
11-23-04, 08:04 PM Nine years old is a bit young. The game has some complex math and rules which players need to be able to understand. Even with twelve-year-olds you need time explain and walk them through the various things. Your average twelve-year-old may not have the patience if you need to hold up an exciting combat explaining things to a young girl.

There is also a big difference in general maturity between a nine and twelve-year-old. There are a lot of things in the real world which you can't realistically explain to a nine-year-old -- especially one who isn't yours. A situation, joke, roleplaying, etc. from one of the twelve-year-olds can easily get into content not appropriate for a nine-year-old. Language, sexual references, violent scenes, etc. It's almost impossible to tell what would come out of the mouth of a twelve-year-old boy.

I'd recommend against it. Try playing with the girls separately. If you are honestly going to consider having them together have a long talk with the boys. Make it clear which words, content, and situations they can't get into.
EatFlan
11-23-04, 09:59 PM Dear Kainy.

Remove the reach weapon from the location it is currently wedged in your 5' square. thank you.
Zzasrix
11-23-04, 11:35 PM I personally think 9 is too young. There are things that i think kids that young should be sheltered from. For example I wouldnt want to explain to a fourth grader about someone going into negative HP and dying after they were the ones that caused all that damage. Also, some of the math will be beyond their ability (taking half damage, 10% exp penalty, ect.).

If you still want the girls to play i would definatly suggest their own game.
Antigone
11-23-04, 11:42 PM Eh, I DM'd for my brother and his friends when I was .... jeez ... I have no idea. When did the red box come out, anyway? Now, I can't say the games were any good, but they all wanted to play, and as the little sister was the only other person around ... well, you improvise, adapt, and overcome, you know?

Anyway, I don't hold with all this girls/boys stuff. If they want to play, I say let them try it. If they don't like it, they'll stop.
BloodGod
11-23-04, 11:44 PM Two 9 year old girls, and four 12-14 year old boys? That's a horrible mix I'd think. I don't know. Maybe the boys are mature and aren't horrible like me and my friends were/are. All I know, is I wouldn't let my niece play in my group. I'd have a seperate one for her and her friends. I'd do this because even if I told my friends to tone down their perverted comments and cursing, they wouldn't do it. Depends on the boys mainly. If they can cope with whatever races/classes the girls want to play and are willing to be mature and tone it down (if they haven't already) then I guess go for it.

-BG
StormKnight
11-24-04, 11:05 AM Nine years old is a bit young. The game has some complex math and rules which players need to be able to understand.
I started playing at that age! Did wonders for my reading ability. (not kidding at all).

There are things that i think kids that young should be sheltered from. For example I wouldnt want to explain to a fourth grader about someone going into negative HP and dying after they were the ones that caused all that damage.
I wouldn't think you would really go into stuff like that with kids that age. Essentially, you emphasize the "game" part of it. You fight monsters, you don't need to dwell on whether or not the monsters survive. Even in normal games with adults I play we don't tend to stress about that - NPCs go down at 0, and if its just a monster/thug/something nobody knows or cares if they are dead or just unconscious.

I agree with others, the age difference may be bigger than the gender difference, but I'm not an expert on kids so its hard to say.

I think the biggest potential hurdle as far as gender differences is just that guys tend to have this idea that these games are "boys games" and not like girls intruding, or assume they won't be good at.

As general advice in this situation, ignoring the age factor, I would say:
1) Catch the new player's characters up first. Play some games with them on their own to get them to a comparable level. Coming into a game where your character is behind can be ok for an experienced gamer, but for a novice it can leave you feeling left out and will definetly increase any gender or age based problems.

2) When adding a female character to a group, do not, I repeat DO NOT encourage her towards the "healer character". When the MHB came out there was a comment that the Healer class was a great "girlfriend" class for the a player's girlfriend who wasn't really sure about the game to play. This is such patently bad advice that the person who said needs to be slapped repeatedly with a rubber chicken. That's the sort of class that's most challenging to play interestingly and most boring if you don't. Don't make them feel like they are supposed to hang back. A good direct tough fighter is a good idea. A combat oriented mage is good to.
Airsucker
11-24-04, 01:20 PM Please do give them the chance to play. I got left out in high school and I'm still bitter about it. :ahem:

It might make sense to have different groups for different ages, but it might also be good for the boys to help out and teach. Sometimes you can be plesently surprised when you give someone a chance to step up and shine. The girls might surprise you too. They might want to be Xena or Buffy the Slayer. (Hopefully without the severe cheeseyness.)
ECOM
11-24-04, 09:58 PM Thankyou to everyone for your comments. I intende to spend time with them to teach the game befor interducing them the boys. I think the boys will more inclined to play with them if they already know the rules. it will also give the girls time to decide if they really want to play.

again thankyou
Eindrachen
11-24-04, 10:27 PM The old gender stereotypes have recently been getting changed a lot. Thanks to the insertion of a new generation of TV programming - from the supernatural action/adventure shows like "Buffy" and "Charmed", to a recent spate of anime with strong female characters - we get to enjoy the presence of a new generation of female geeks.

Just like there are younger guys who want to play characters like Wolverine or Inuyasha, the younger gals also want to play the roles of their favored heroines. And, naturally, RPGs are the best way for them to do so. (Well, that and cosplay, but that's another subject for another time.)

Can the two genders play well together? Well, that depends a lot on both the players and the DM. If the players are willing to work together, it doesn't matter what gender (or age, or whatever) they are; the group will get along if they want to, regardless.

The only thing I'd really do is talk to the current players, and ask them what they think. Sad as it is, gaming has to be a democratic experience, so it's best to make sure they want to include someone there. Once they do, make sure to talk to the girl(s) that wish to play, and tell them who the other players are.

If all are willing, the DM can certainly run games that anyone might want to participate in. That whole thing about "saving candyland from the evil wolf" is hardly what all girls (or, I daresay, most girls) in gaming want. You're more likely to expect girls looking for a nice blend of action/adventure, and actual role-playing, far more than many guys do.

Just pay attention to each player's favorite shows and stuff, so that you can adjust each adventure or game session accordingly. It's frustrating for the players if they don't get at least something in the game that is personally interesting to them.
Gedrin
11-24-04, 11:42 PM I DM for an older group. Most of my players are at or near 30 years old. For the past 6 years, my group has always had both men and women players. It works just fine, then again all my players are well adjusted adults with their own lives.

To expect that young girls and teen aged boys, can coexist in the same space for any period of time, and there not be problems, is likely unrealistic. Older boys tend not to play with younger boys, much less younger girls. All differences will be more pronounced.

Gender differences aside, a 9 year old's view of the world and "the way things work" is vastly different than a 14 year old's. That may be as big a complication as dealing with the fact that boys and girls are different, particularly at those ages.

The ease of integrating these two groups will depend on the type of game you run. All that said, I'll offer the advice I would to a group of adult gamers.

While new players require consideration and time to become part of the group, it's often worthwhile. If you and your players are all willing to devote the time and effort needed to bring aboard these new players, and you are willing to bend a bit yourselves as the new play styles blend into the group, I'd encourage you to give it a shot. I've you don't think you can bring the new players up to speed, or you think you'll have to change to the point that the game isn't fun, the new players are probably better off in a different group anyway.
Carkni
11-25-04, 01:49 AM 9? That's grade four. I remember being quite thick when I was in grade three, and can't remember grade four that well. I don't recommend it. Perhaps diceless RPing would be best for the girls.

And are the boys getting better at role playing or roll playing?

Post/Author/DateTime	Post
ECOM 11-22-04, 11:42 PM	I am curently dm for a group of player 4 boys age 12-14 (my brother and some of his frends) the game is going good and the boys are starting to become better roll players. We have been playing at my house for the past year and now my daugter and one of her frends (both age 9) have expressed interest in playing. Im not sure if i should mix the two together. The boys have a tendency to act like teenage boys and are a little bit uncontrolable. I am not sure i want to submit the girls to this (i already have parental permition for both girls). Does anyone have any thoughts on the matter?
Morwen 11-22-04, 11:47 PM	I suggest you try it out for a couple of sessions, and if it doesn't work out (Knowing boys in that age, I wouldn't have too high hopes :() you can start up a separate game for the two girls. That might work better either way due to the age difference.
Board_Rider 11-22-04, 11:50 PM	Yeah, try it out...couldn't hurt..may be fun.
Draco Strang 11-22-04, 11:52 PM	If it were my group, I would split the two. I'm willing to bet that the boys want to kill things, get treasure, and become half dragons. I also bet the girls want to be sprites and nixies, and save candyland from the evil wolf. No,I'm not gendertyping, I speak from personal experience, had the same problem when i was 12 and a girl our age wanted to play. Play two games, you'll be all the happier for it.
eshadowe 11-22-04, 11:59 PM	I suggest seperating the group just based on age basically. I actually very much like a mixed group, but I believe with the age difference the two groups will have different motives and desires. It'd be like having that same group of of boys play with a group of players in there early 20's. BUT it'd suggest that the two groups hear the tales of what the others do as your bar tales, this will make it so the groups aren't totally seperate, and maybe have one players or a group do a cameo in the others games. That way both groups can do what they want, develop into the group they want and be able to 'interact' once in a while.
green_yawgmoth 11-23-04, 12:00 AM	Why not find out what the girls want to play before stereotyping them into Little Orphan Annies? http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v91/yawgmoth/kittyjig.gif
Neerie 11-23-04, 12:02 AM	At that age, even the smallest difference is a big difference, so even if just for the age "gap" I'd keep them separated. The boys will act like teenagers, because they are, the girls on the other hand, are still kids there. Oh and one thing that made me laugh in the original post: the boys are starting to become better roll players Considering that this is a role playing game, using lots of die rolls, I found it funny, even if it was just a small mistake (and probably because it's midnight).
ThatDarnCat 11-23-04, 01:02 AM	In my experience boys and grrrls of equal age do OK, but that is too big a gap. Running a seperate game for the grrrls would be the best bet. Just don't dumb it down. It's one thing to make the plots simple and easy to follow, but use all the rules as they are. Just be prepared to spend lots of time explaining everything several times.
Felonious Monk 11-23-04, 02:56 AM	I'm running an occasional campaign for my cousin, his three kids (two girls 12 and 8, and a 10 year old boy), and my girlfriend. It can best be described as chaotic... I think you are probably a good judge of how well the boys will deal with the girls. Would the boys help the girls out, or would they (metaphorically) elbow them out of the way? You should have a decent idea of how well they would work together (If I'm reading your post correctly, one of the boys is one of the girls' uncle - they're related, anyway). You could introduce the girls to the game separately - maybe a one-shot where they have their own adventure together - before introducing them to the larger party. Introducing them could even be an opportunity for more roleplaying, or to separate role-playing from personal opinions. If one of the boys is a Cleric or Paladin, the responsibility of the class makes a good welcome a necessity. I'd give it a shot. With a double shot of patience. Don't forget, six is much harder than four, even if they're all experienced roleplayers. Good Luck!
Tytalus 11-23-04, 04:30 AM	You could introduce the girls to the game separately - maybe a one-shot where they have their own adventure together - before introducing them to the larger party. That's the way to go. As they gain some experience roleplaying and get more comfortable with the whole process, they'll be much better prepared for the other group. This way you also don't have to slow the boy's game down explaining rules etc. to the girls. Another aspect to this is to have the girl choose characters complementary to the boys'. Then, after joining the two groups, throw challenges at them where each one has an opportunity to shine (always a good thing). Ideally, the combined group will learn to depend on each other.
Zagan 11-23-04, 04:36 AM	maybe try explaining the situation to the boys to be a litle more mature. Otherwise i'd give it a try.
Zao Fato 11-23-04, 05:02 AM	I agree with all the rest of them, either play two different campaigns, or do a one nighter with the girls and see if they even like it first, and if they are ok, then see if it is worth joining the two groups. I DM for 6, including my girlfriend, tha other 5 are guys, and I find that, her idea's are always left out on occassion. And as she is the healer, she is expected to heal all the time. Guys and Girls, can Roleplay together, but it may take time. And at that age, it might even put the boys off Roleplaying
Black Kitten 11-23-04, 07:49 AM	I DM for 6, including my girlfriend, tha other 5 are guys, and I find that, her idea's are always left out on occassion. And as she is the healer, she is expected to heal all the time. I am currently without GF, but that is exactly the reason why my ex-gf's always had some powerfull firework/greatsword instead of a healer's robe when joining the party. The party wouldn't venture into melee without them.
EatFlan 11-23-04, 09:52 AM	while conceptually pleasant the threat of a staph-cooties transfer is far to great to ignore. delousing is recommended at regular intervals.
On_the_wings_of_TPK 11-23-04, 10:58 AM	while conceptually pleasant the threat of a staph-cooties transfer is far to great to ignore. delousing is recommended at regular intervals. Thats just uncalled for. Dude, get a life. For the OP, You rock dude. Get'm hooked while their young. My group is 7 strong. I have one casual player and the rest are regulars. The gender break down is 2 females to 5 males. The age range is 16, or is she 17, to 25. Depending on the amount of work you want to do anything is possible, I'd just figure out what everyone wantys and see what you can do to enclude it. Boys can be half dragons and get loot while helping the girls save candy land from the evil wolf, if that is the case. In any event just make sure everyone is having fun, that is is point after all. Cheers.
EatFlan 11-23-04, 11:25 AM	i'm not the one living in a small dark hole.
PaladinKD 11-23-04, 11:42 AM	i'm not the one living in a small dark hole. My hole is extradimensional, quite roomy and has an everburning torch! I'll send you the blueprints if you'd like TPK! :help: :tongue:
FriendoftheDork 11-23-04, 07:20 PM	Now if the girls are as interested in roll playing as the boys, it should be fine. Just make sure you make some house rules about what references to be made etc. (for example no sexual stuff). If, however the girls really want to roleplay I think this situation may cause the girls to never want to play an RPG again.. that should be avoided. So find out what they want.
On_the_wings_of_TPK 11-23-04, 07:27 PM	My hole is extradimensional, quite roomy and has an everburning torch! I'll send you the blueprints if you'd like TPK! :help: :tongue: :heehee :heehee :rofl: Cheers!
Cymraegmorgan 11-23-04, 07:34 PM	When I was a teenager we had a mixed group, not quite as many girls, until my two cousins(both girls of 10) wanted to learn to play. It slowed play down a little, but otherwise we had lots of fun and no problems.
Kainy 11-23-04, 08:02 PM	In general, I would not advise mixing 12 yo. boys with 9 yo. girls. However, I don't personally know the kids, and they may, for all I know, be well-adjusted, mature for their age, and perfectly capable of handling it. For instance, I know a 14 yo. who, if you didn't know it, would seem like they were a senior in high school. So anything's possible, but I'd have to know the kids to give you a terribly valid opinion. Also, EatFlan, again, I note your posts having no value whatsoever (even comedic), and humbly request that you stop putting them on the boards. You can get your moment of personal glee just by imagining that you posted them, and then move on, leaving the rest of us in peace. I think it would work out as well or better for all involved parties.
BW0222 11-23-04, 08:04 PM	Nine years old is a bit young. The game has some complex math and rules which players need to be able to understand. Even with twelve-year-olds you need time explain and walk them through the various things. Your average twelve-year-old may not have the patience if you need to hold up an exciting combat explaining things to a young girl. There is also a big difference in general maturity between a nine and twelve-year-old. There are a lot of things in the real world which you can't realistically explain to a nine-year-old -- especially one who isn't yours. A situation, joke, roleplaying, etc. from one of the twelve-year-olds can easily get into content not appropriate for a nine-year-old. Language, sexual references, violent scenes, etc. It's almost impossible to tell what would come out of the mouth of a twelve-year-old boy. I'd recommend against it. Try playing with the girls separately. If you are honestly going to consider having them together have a long talk with the boys. Make it clear which words, content, and situations they can't get into.
EatFlan 11-23-04, 09:59 PM	Dear Kainy. Remove the reach weapon from the location it is currently wedged in your 5' square. thank you.
Zzasrix 11-23-04, 11:35 PM	I personally think 9 is too young. There are things that i think kids that young should be sheltered from. For example I wouldnt want to explain to a fourth grader about someone going into negative HP and dying after they were the ones that caused all that damage. Also, some of the math will be beyond their ability (taking half damage, 10% exp penalty, ect.). If you still want the girls to play i would definatly suggest their own game.
Antigone 11-23-04, 11:42 PM	Eh, I DM'd for my brother and his friends when I was .... jeez ... I have no idea. When did the red box come out, anyway? Now, I can't say the games were any good, but they all wanted to play, and as the little sister was the only other person around ... well, you improvise, adapt, and overcome, you know? Anyway, I don't hold with all this girls/boys stuff. If they want to play, I say let them try it. If they don't like it, they'll stop.
BloodGod 11-23-04, 11:44 PM	Two 9 year old girls, and four 12-14 year old boys? That's a horrible mix I'd think. I don't know. Maybe the boys are mature and aren't horrible like me and my friends were/are. All I know, is I wouldn't let my niece play in my group. I'd have a seperate one for her and her friends. I'd do this because even if I told my friends to tone down their perverted comments and cursing, they wouldn't do it. Depends on the boys mainly. If they can cope with whatever races/classes the girls want to play and are willing to be mature and tone it down (if they haven't already) then I guess go for it. -BG
StormKnight 11-24-04, 11:05 AM	Nine years old is a bit young. The game has some complex math and rules which players need to be able to understand. I started playing at that age! Did wonders for my reading ability. (not kidding at all). There are things that i think kids that young should be sheltered from. For example I wouldnt want to explain to a fourth grader about someone going into negative HP and dying after they were the ones that caused all that damage. I wouldn't think you would really go into stuff like that with kids that age. Essentially, you emphasize the "game" part of it. You fight monsters, you don't need to dwell on whether or not the monsters survive. Even in normal games with adults I play we don't tend to stress about that - NPCs go down at 0, and if its just a monster/thug/something nobody knows or cares if they are dead or just unconscious. I agree with others, the age difference may be bigger than the gender difference, but I'm not an expert on kids so its hard to say. I think the biggest potential hurdle as far as gender differences is just that guys tend to have this idea that these games are "boys games" and not like girls intruding, or assume they won't be good at. As general advice in this situation, ignoring the age factor, I would say: 1) Catch the new player's characters up first. Play some games with them on their own to get them to a comparable level. Coming into a game where your character is behind can be ok for an experienced gamer, but for a novice it can leave you feeling left out and will definetly increase any gender or age based problems. 2) When adding a female character to a group, do not, I repeat DO NOT encourage her towards the "healer character". When the MHB came out there was a comment that the Healer class was a great "girlfriend" class for the a player's girlfriend who wasn't really sure about the game to play. This is such patently bad advice that the person who said needs to be slapped repeatedly with a rubber chicken. That's the sort of class that's most challenging to play interestingly and most boring if you don't. Don't make them feel like they are supposed to hang back. A good direct tough fighter is a good idea. A combat oriented mage is good to.
Airsucker 11-24-04, 01:20 PM	Please do give them the chance to play. I got left out in high school and I'm still bitter about it. :ahem: It might make sense to have different groups for different ages, but it might also be good for the boys to help out and teach. Sometimes you can be plesently surprised when you give someone a chance to step up and shine. The girls might surprise you too. They might want to be Xena or Buffy the Slayer. (Hopefully without the severe cheeseyness.)
ECOM 11-24-04, 09:58 PM	Thankyou to everyone for your comments. I intende to spend time with them to teach the game befor interducing them the boys. I think the boys will more inclined to play with them if they already know the rules. it will also give the girls time to decide if they really want to play. again thankyou
Eindrachen 11-24-04, 10:27 PM	The old gender stereotypes have recently been getting changed a lot. Thanks to the insertion of a new generation of TV programming - from the supernatural action/adventure shows like "Buffy" and "Charmed", to a recent spate of anime with strong female characters - we get to enjoy the presence of a new generation of female geeks. Just like there are younger guys who want to play characters like Wolverine or Inuyasha, the younger gals also want to play the roles of their favored heroines. And, naturally, RPGs are the best way for them to do so. (Well, that and cosplay, but that's another subject for another time.) Can the two genders play well together? Well, that depends a lot on both the players and the DM. If the players are willing to work together, it doesn't matter what gender (or age, or whatever) they are; the group will get along if they want to, regardless. The only thing I'd really do is talk to the current players, and ask them what they think. Sad as it is, gaming has to be a democratic experience, so it's best to make sure they want to include someone there. Once they do, make sure to talk to the girl(s) that wish to play, and tell them who the other players are. If all are willing, the DM can certainly run games that anyone might want to participate in. That whole thing about "saving candyland from the evil wolf" is hardly what all girls (or, I daresay, most girls) in gaming want. You're more likely to expect girls looking for a nice blend of action/adventure, and actual role-playing, far more than many guys do. Just pay attention to each player's favorite shows and stuff, so that you can adjust each adventure or game session accordingly. It's frustrating for the players if they don't get at least something in the game that is personally interesting to them.
Gedrin 11-24-04, 11:42 PM	I DM for an older group. Most of my players are at or near 30 years old. For the past 6 years, my group has always had both men and women players. It works just fine, then again all my players are well adjusted adults with their own lives. To expect that young girls and teen aged boys, can coexist in the same space for any period of time, and there not be problems, is likely unrealistic. Older boys tend not to play with younger boys, much less younger girls. All differences will be more pronounced. Gender differences aside, a 9 year old's view of the world and "the way things work" is vastly different than a 14 year old's. That may be as big a complication as dealing with the fact that boys and girls are different, particularly at those ages. The ease of integrating these two groups will depend on the type of game you run. All that said, I'll offer the advice I would to a group of adult gamers. While new players require consideration and time to become part of the group, it's often worthwhile. If you and your players are all willing to devote the time and effort needed to bring aboard these new players, and you are willing to bend a bit yourselves as the new play styles blend into the group, I'd encourage you to give it a shot. I've you don't think you can bring the new players up to speed, or you think you'll have to change to the point that the game isn't fun, the new players are probably better off in a different group anyway.
Carkni 11-25-04, 01:49 AM	9? That's grade four. I remember being quite thick when I was in grade three, and can't remember grade four that well. I don't recommend it. Perhaps diceless RPing would be best for the girls. And are the boys getting better at role playing or roll playing?