Post/Author/DateTime	Post
The Vorpal Tribble 01-02-06, 12:39 AM	Ok, in my years of DMing I always, ALWAYS, have the oddest things being wished to be played. I got into the habit of making a list of what I would allow. I even write above the list for everyone: Player Races Allowed (don't ask if you can play 'This-strange-race-from-somewhere-I've-never-heard-of'. No, not even if it's really cool. No, not that either. ONLY what I have listed). I then go on to say that if anyone asks me if they can play a drow they are out. One of the first questions... can I play a drow? Next player 'how about a half tiger avariel?' 'A WHAT? Look at my list of allowable races' 'Oh, ok, man I must look dumb, sorry... so, can I play one?' This literally happened. -=-=-=-=-=- Then there was the lawful good succubus who wanted to play some book of vile deeds PrC... and the half bronze golem troll... And in my current game two people wanted to be the son of the Emporer of the Empire of the collective human and dwarven lands. *holds his head*
smoker 01-02-06, 12:40 AM	Let's see. One player in one of my games gave his character the following languages: blackbean (no idea what that means) spanglish ebonics Of course, I just shook my head and told the player he had to roleplay out those languages. We all had a good laugh. smoker
Otherguy 01-02-06, 12:43 AM	Ahem. Human cleric/rogue/ranger/fighter? with an ENERGY WEAPON on one arm that pumped out something like 16 projectiles/round who was slowly turning into a dwarf and was the temporally misplaced leader of a church dedicated to his former character who became a god. Apparently.
Malruhn 01-02-06, 12:53 AM	I dig back many years, but there was one guy that INSISTED on using the same set of stats, race and classes for EVERY character he had. He had a half-elf Ftr/Thief/MU named Igorr (two "R"s made it scarier, I guess)... for every game. The stats were okay... 16 STR, 15 INT, 15 DEX, and 10s for the others... But, DAMN!! Play something else! Or at least pick a NEW NAME!!! Then there was another guy that wanted to play a Lionelle (huh??) ninja. This was standard 2nd edition D&D with the screwiest race being half-orc!!! And I can only imagine that a Lionelle was a Lion headed human... Gimme a break...
Luminous Crayon 01-02-06, 01:23 AM	The following was submitted as a potential character for an all Good-aligned roleplay-heavy game I had the privelege to play in for two years. A lawful-neutral druid who worships... wait for it... Natural Selection. Right down to the animal companion named Darwin. Note that, first of all, it doesn't meet the clearly stated requirement of Good alignment. The character sheet was also submitted without any equipment or feats, maybe some other things missing; I don't remember. Not to mention the fact that the concept itself is rather uninspired, especially for a serious, heavy-roleplaying game. (I fully understand that in a lighthearted beer-and-pretzels dungeon crawl, things are entirely different.) But the player was absolutely flabbergasted that he wasn't picked to play in this game. Not very self-aware, I guess.
Gopher 01-02-06, 03:44 AM	This is not technically a bad character concept but it is the character with the most mistakes that I have ever seen. About mid way through a campaign I take a look at one of my characters sheets. He got every single thing on the entire sheet wrong. Im not kidding I really mean every single thing that he could have possibly got wrong he did get wrong. It was amazing. I will give you some of the examples I can remember. He had gauntlets of ogre power +2 with the most amazing special property I have ever seen. They were also a +4 belt of giant strength. He was a barbarian/frenzied berzerker who could do amazing things that no other member of the classes could do like wear full plate and rage, and he could frenzy and get a +6 to his con. How? I dont know he was just that good. Also he had about 12 feats. Now I can not remember how many he was supposed to have but it was not that many. Also included on the list were Weapon Specilization and Greater Weapon Focus. I couldnt get over how clever he was. I mean choosing feats that he didnt meet the requirements for??? What an incredibly good way to make a really good character. Now this player wasnt a jerk or anything. He just lacks any hint of intelligence. He really is a fun player to have along. Also in his defense he has since that day become a much much better gamer. But I still look at all of his character sheets.
Rumple_Cragstan 01-02-06, 03:53 AM	I had one guy who actually played a character which I swear was the result of him putting every anime character he thought was badass into a blender. He was a ninja. With a cyramic(sp?) circus mask covering half of his face. Who had a trained crane as an animal companion (he took a few levels in ranger). Who used the biggest sword he could find, which looked like a massive katana. Who had some kinda of demonic possession thing going on, never really elaborated. He was an outcast from his family, and eventually returned to kill them all in thier sleep. And he was a loner. And moonlighted as an assassin. What a crazy bastard.
Lord of Dorkness 01-02-06, 04:01 AM	One of my players is constantly giving me trouble with his antisocial characters. First he plays a dwarf barbarian. ok, that's not wildly original, but caused no undue troubles either besides some broken noses all around. Next he takes it up a notch and presents his lizardfolk fighter/ranger with favored enemies humans and elves! Everyone in our group hates elves so that's fine, but when he started showing his latest shrinkheads to the neighbor's kids things got ugly. Also, he had the habit to eat the bodies of his enemies. After the rampaging mob scared him out of the campaign with torches and pitchforks, he comes up with his newest idea: a cleric. Hooray I think, a holy man with a morale codex. Not really, because he plays a necromancing cleric of Wee-Jas but has methods that would make Nerull turn his head in disgust.
Cold Napalm 01-02-06, 04:04 AM	I want to play a kender... It doesn't matter what comes next.
Gailbraithe 01-02-06, 04:37 AM	I think a "Lionelle" is a reference to Lionelle, leader of the Thundercats. The worst I ever get is pixies. Players who want to play pixies. Or sprites, or any other cheerful little tiny woodlawn fey thing with wings. I refuse them on the grounds that if any player properly role-played one I would have to physically eject them from my home after a swift but violent thrashing. Pixies = good for squashing.
Rauric 01-02-06, 04:49 AM	Heh. I wanna play a Grig. Not in the traditional, faerie, annoying way either. He would be a hard drinking hard loving little guy. Don't know what he would be loving as a tiny being, but he would be loving it nonstop! People that want to play faeries in a bigger group are fine by me if they try not to hog the spotlight and cause mischief and mayham EVERY adventure.
NeoRaven01 01-02-06, 05:01 AM	First time I, or any of my friend's besides the DM, had ever played D&D my friend's brother played a half-orc ranger. Kinda out of the norm so it's good right? Nope. That half-orc was named, I kid you not, Dr. Feel-good who had max ranks in heal. Oh yeah. Then there was the half nymph...
tsuyoshikentsu 01-02-06, 05:37 AM	A few concepts I've had the misfortune of knowing: Sir Tassadar Bovine, the near-perfect paladin with only one flaw: no basic survival sense whatsoever. Squiggly, the Half-Illithid Anthropomorphic Bat. (Also known as "what the f*ck IS that thing?!") Tim, the gestalt Mind Flayer/Ranger//Ranger/Illithid Savant, with most of his feats being Trophy Hunter (Favored Enemy X, Heart). Needless to say, food was not very common at that table. Especially after I started making slurping sound effects. The antisocial Elan who spends most of his waking hours alter selfed into a choker. Bouncy Boy. Enough said. Tyler Durden. The same. Ug, the troll Barbarian/Frenzied Berserker. It doesn't sound so bad until you realize that INT was his primary dump stat, with WIS going immediately after. Buttercup, the six-year-old Necropolitan Dread Necromancer. With a dolly. That kills things.
Hairfoot 01-02-06, 07:26 AM	Muh. At least there's some thought going on with some of those. I seem to meet illithid/half-golem/bloodleach/ranger/monk Star-Trek D&D maniacs quite often. Oh, and Drazz't - drow ranger wielding two short swords D'rizzt - drow ranger wielding two flails Brizz't - drow rogue wielding two scimitars And so on, and so forth. No one likes being accused of being derivative.
Cuaglar 01-02-06, 07:42 AM	I've got an 'elf' who is exactly Drizzt Do'Urden, in every detail, except his name is Aramil. He hasn't roleplayed yet (taking some time to assemble the characters) but I'm expecting the worst.
Crichton 01-02-06, 07:45 AM	My favorite has got to be my little brother's debut character, the half-copper dragon Ranger, who pumped up nothing but handle animal with the hopes of getting a dragon as his animal companion. I'll never forget when our DM threw in a baby dragon in one adventure to taunt him, "roll a 20 to even see if the dragon kills you outright," ...20..."damn, ok...roll a 20 to talk to it," ...20..."ummm, roll a 20 check to try to pet it"...20...luckiest rolling streak ever, he got the dragon as an animal companion. Did I mention he took two-weapon fighting for his patented combo attack. Running up to someone and using his off-hand to slash someone with his claws, then using two-weapon fighting to use a bow on someone 35 ft away, provoking the attack of opportunity for firing a bow every time.
Tyler Do'Urden 01-02-06, 07:55 AM	Anyone remember this wonderful little piece of... history? Stop me if you've heard it. So a friend of a friend asked if he could join our group. As another player had just dropped out, I gave him a trial period. He's in his mid-twenties, and had been playing for a little over two years. I gave him the same character creation rules as the campaign had always had: - 28 point buy - character creation from PHB, MM, DMG and the Complete books only - check with me if you want to take a prestige class - 12th level character - No psionics What does he turn up with? A 14th level character ("I was going to go with 12th level, but then I thought the other players could be my entourage, learning from me.") who was made with a 34 point buy ("It fit my character concept to have higher stats.") and the gestalt system ("Everyone uses it don't they? What's the point playing just one class per level?"). Among his many classes were psion ("I know you said no psionics, but I thought my guy could be the only one in the world.") and Ur-Priest ("Oh, you meant it when you said I should check with you about PrCs? Why?") When I told him his character was illegal in so many ways, he started harping on about me restricting his character concept, that he had carefully constructed it for roleplaying purposes. The funniest thing? I noticed a distinct lack of info at the top of the sheet. So asked him what his character looked like "He's human." And his name "I didn't get around to that. I'll call him... Tom.". Personality? "He's angry at something." At what? "I don't know. Maybe you could make something up for me." I told him he had to make a new character, according to the given rules, and with a concept bigger than "human with lots of different classes" He told me that he couldn't create with such restrictions, and left. No-one tried to stop him. I look at this and thank god for my gaming group because the worst things we come up with are puns like an overweight master of chains named Jacob Farley. Tyler Durden. The same. Hey. You're not supposed to talk about it.
Derrigan 01-02-06, 07:58 AM	I think a "Lionelle" is a reference to Lionelle, leader of the Thundercats. . Actually that was Lion-O. It's this **** retentive attention to stupid trivia that marks me a child of the 80's. :D
green_yawgmoth 01-02-06, 09:33 AM	I had a player who desparately wanted to play a half-fiend, and being a new DM, I let him (with the standard +4 LA, obv.) He wrote his backstory up for me, and being that he has his english degree, it was a pretty well-written story. The problem? The character had no less than three personality disorders, including a god complex (to quote: "he thinks everyone is a waste of time and skin unless proven otherwise") and a glaring need for attention. In play, he was a near perfect copy-paste of Inuyasha with the added bonus of trying to start a cult based on his worship. I let him play it because I thought I could base a couple plot points around it in the future, but his combination of jumping into the fray (as a sorcerer) and some unlucky rolls on his part meant the character's demise. I found out later that both he and his girlfriend (whose character he practically played for her) thought I was a bad DM, despite my asking them in private after each session if they were having fun and if there was anything I could do to make the game more enjoyable. They both said everything was good. :rolleyes: http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v91/yawgmoth/kittyjig.gif
The Phantom Flan Flinger 01-02-06, 02:26 PM	"I know you said no psionics, but I thought my guy could be the only one in the world."Yep, that. Substitute anything you like for the word "psionics" - Chaotic alignments, paladins, Drow, non-good patron Deities, bastard sons of royalty - and anyone who seizes on your one character restriction and explains that they have to be the exception because their really cool concept doesn't work otherwise gets a good, if silent, groan from me. It especially seems to happen if there's the slightest hint that having the "rare in this campaign" attribute might make their character the centre of attention. I once tabled an online campaign in a setting where elves were almost unknown and vilified/enslaved (a half-baked plot arc I was playing around with). Each of the five potential players sent me a PM with his character concept... one human, one half-elf, and three elves. So I ditched the idea and ran something in the Realms instead - same players - not one of them wanted to play an elf. *shrugs* What can you do?
nastynate 01-02-06, 02:42 PM	Actually that was Lion-O. It's this **** retentive attention to stupid trivia that marks me a child of the 80's. Snarf, snarf, fellow child of the 80s. snarf, snarf...
Adamant 01-02-06, 02:49 PM	This one may seem normal but look closely. Krunk- Half Orc Barbarian str-14 int-16 He put all his skill points in Crafts and Knowledges! He didn't even have any ranks in Wilderness Survival!
Gailbraithe 01-02-06, 03:22 PM	Actually that was Lion-O. It's this **** retentive attention to stupid trivia that marks me a child of the 80's. :D Oh, okay. I haven't seen the show since I was...10? Maybe 11? Long time. So what is a Lionelle then? An african-american pop crooner best known for "All Night Long"? No...that's a Lionel...damn it... --- I've run several elf free worlds, and always had one guy who had to play an elf. After severals "No." "No." "NO! There are NO ELVES! GET IT? NO ELVES, NONE, NADA, ZILCH, ZERO, NO FREAKING ELVES!!!!" I would always get this question: "Well, okay, then how about a half-elf..." (*DM runs screaming for the hills)
Reinforcements 01-02-06, 03:25 PM	Actually that was Lion-O. It's this **** retentive attention to stupid trivia that marks me a child of the 80's. :D Curses! Beat me to it! Remember: Lion-O leads the Thundercats in their fight against Mumrah and the forces of evil. Lionelle makes toy trains. Anyway, there was a moment I had with a friend that wasn't so much "groan" as "laugh," but it seems to be about right. I believe the conversation went something like this: Friend: Would you object to me playing a rastafarian dwarf? Me: With every fibre of my being. And that was the end of that. There is also the story of the DM with the two DMPCs who were far-and-away the most powerful characters in the party, but that might be a bit off.
red_scare87 01-02-06, 03:40 PM	Lionelle makes toy trains. Yeah, well I was the one who said this! And that was the end of that. There is also the story of the DM with the two DMPCs who were far-and-away the most powerful characters in the party, but that might be a bit off. I seem to have had the same problem a little while back. Wait, it's still going on, oh well it's only 2nd Edition anyway. P.S. Reinforcements and and I are sitting in the same room. We're brothers and played in the same game a bit ago which I'm still playing and he gave up on. I'm just a glutton for punishment I guess.
ressurrector 01-02-06, 04:39 PM	I remember this one really screwed up group we had, here's a listing of the players: half "crimson" dragon (friend made it up and DM allowed): pretty much a fighter with high charisma to bluff people into believing anything, used this to kill a party member and get away with it. Were-Panther Ranger, with a panther (of the opposite gender) as an anima companion, oh the jokes.... The powergamer psionic githyanki tho was 10' tall with DR and silver skin due to an item...nobody in town even thought it was weird... So I decided to make the most screwed up thing I could, as the group was dying. came up with a half-machine half-dragon with unarmored AC up around 35 (before dext) and 6 limbs dealing 2d6 each...nicknamed freak of nature. I'm glad the group died before I soiled my honor actually playing it.
Dig 01-02-06, 05:22 PM	any of the races from MMIII :D
Rumple_Cragstan 01-02-06, 05:44 PM	any of the races from MMIII :D Oh... you mean the races from Ebberon? Good Call.
green_yawgmoth 01-02-06, 06:09 PM	Oh... you mean the races from Ebberon? Good Call. Eberron. http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v91/yawgmoth/smileys/eng101.gif And what's wrong with those races? They are hardly overpowered. http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v91/yawgmoth/kittyjig.gif
Arcuna 01-02-06, 06:46 PM	I met some kid at a friend's party once who wanted to play (get this) a fuzzball with no limbs, the ability to fly, and a 26' tongue. I told him no, thanked all that was good in the world that he lived halfway across the country and was just in town for the party, and then walked away. Then he insisted that I buy a webcam so that he could join my already oversized group. After ten minutes of telling him that I wasn't going to buy a webcam just for D&D purposes, he looks at me and says, "So, I'm guessing that's a no, then?" :banghead:
Deacon Liadon 01-02-06, 07:57 PM	I have a player in my group who is absolutly obsessive about Kytons. So far he's wanted to play: Half construct kyton bard, half dragon kyton sorc, and a half undead kyton pale master. Also, three words which will make you quaked your boots in fear: Female... Dwarven... Bellydancer.
ressurrector 01-02-06, 08:14 PM	Also, three words which will make you quaked your boots in fear: Female... Dwarven... Bellydancer. Just rule that the beard covers it all up......
Xeraph 01-02-06, 08:40 PM	I get a headache every time a player of mine wants to be either a straight caster or manifestor. Most anoying was the blue-haired female dwarven cleric of some halfling diety. Luckily she died, and the guy made a halfling rogue... later turned out to be so encredible evil, psychotic and vile... cheating everybody, and cutting in them if they came near him, that we made him a goblin instead... a pitch black goblin with red eyes and fangs. He would drop from 0 hp to -1 and begin dying for the love of cash or coup de grace's. Litterily rolling from wagons, where he was dying just to land near something at the ground worth stealing or cutting up, dead or alive. Funny part, the group consisted of all good characters who couldnt bare killing the puny goblin. Great times. And then theres the Gandalfs and Elminsters. . . the horror! :eek:
Ridureyu 01-02-06, 08:46 PM	Speaking of the Monster manual III, I was looking through mine and I noticed that Crystalline Trolls are listed as a player race.
Lady Maedhros 01-02-06, 09:23 PM	Yeah. I'm gonna go with Kender. First campaign i ever ran, i was an optimistic noob of a DM and wanted my players to have fun, so i told them they could be whatever they wanted. We got a half-celestial paladin (fine with great backstory), a half-dragon (also fine, although he seemed to miss the "this will be an exalted campaign" somewhere along the line), a human cleric (completely fine), and a kender. I didn't know. How could i have known? I'd never heard of them. I had no idea what i was in for. Namely Chaotic Stupid with a side of Chaotic Evil in an Exalted campaign. With a side of "i can steal anything, hide anywhere, and **** off anyone with no consequences because no mere guard can imprison or contain me." In-game smackdowns for clearly outrageous behavior led to out-of-game tension and pretty much tore the whole campaign apart. Ugh. I so despise Kender.
RK)13 01-02-06, 09:28 PM	Then there was another guy that wanted to play a Lionelle (huh??) ninja. This was standard 2nd edition D&D with the screwiest race being half-orc!!! And I can only imagine that a Lionelle was a Lion headed human... Maybe it was a leonal Guardinel.... Maybe it was Lionelle the Leonal, who could whoop butt, dresses well, and can name the entire off broadway cast of the pajama party.... *growl baby* I think my favorite was the gnomish cleric (2nd ed) who thought he was a wizard and carried around two gigantic stone tablets that he used as "spell books"
gleep 01-02-06, 09:48 PM	A half-human half-dwarf. And I don't mean some oddball offspring after a human and dwarf managed to find love in each other. This was half and half vertically. Needless to say, he had a bad limp. :d --gleep
Vileneeds of Q 01-02-06, 10:16 PM	its not so bad when you look at it, but it happened in 2 ed, Half-Orc Cleric/Assasin. "But he is True neutral"
Lady Maedhros 01-02-06, 11:14 PM	Oh by the way, "Lionel" makes trains. "Lionelle" is, as far as i know, made up.
PinkVishnu 01-02-06, 11:36 PM	Friend: Would you object to me playing a rastafarian dwarf? Me: With every fibre of my being. LOL! That's going on my quote list (I hope you don't mind). Ha ha ha! Alrighty, I'm surprised this one hasn't come up (or at least not often enough for me to notice): I am the son/daughter of an ancient empire/dead god. Too much Baldur's Gate.
Dire Hamster 01-03-06, 12:17 AM	*LMAO* After reading this thread, I can't express how glad I am to have the group that I do. Most of the ideas on here were, without a doubt, some of the lamest, cheesiest, corniest, most retarded character ideas I've ever read in my life! :D Geez, how do people come up with this crap?!? Some of these posts are hilarious! Thank God my players don't come up with bad ideas like this! :) I think it's pretty ridiculous when a player wants to play an lawful good, immortal, one-of a kind half-pink dragon, spell-touched, etheral, fiendish troll who is the one and only living heir of the emperor of the entire world (oh yeah, and he's a millionaire too), or something asisnine like that! How the hell do you role-play a character like that? He'd be a celebrity (famous or infamous) that was recognized everywhere, so over-powered it would be unbalancing, and (in my opinion) not even fun to play. How do you immerse yourself in a campaign or world when the character you are playing sticks out in that world like a sore thumb? I think players that want to play that kind of stuff are merely starved for attention (either in the game-world or in real life). They think they have to stand out to have an interesting, unique character. Like this guy said: Yep, that. Substitute anything you like for the word "psionics" - Chaotic alignments, paladins, Drow, non-good patron Deities, bastard sons of royalty - and anyone who seizes on your one character restriction and explains that they have to be the exception because their really cool concept doesn't work otherwise...I once tabled an online campaign in a setting where elves were almost unknown and vilified/enslaved (a half-baked plot arc I was playing around with). Each of the five potential players sent me a PM with his character concept... one human, one half-elf, and three elves. So I ditched the idea and ran something in the Realms instead - same players - not one of them wanted to play an elf. As for the orignal question, I'm pretty strict with what I allow. Basically, just the core races: human, elf, half-elf, halfling, dwarf, half-orc, gnome. I will allow other basic playable races occasionally, if the player gets prior permission, such as gnoll, lizardfolk, etc. All the people I play with (either as DM or player) pretty much share my view on this. I think it's much more fun to play a basic race; it helps promote player immersion in the setting and storyline. You're not an uber-powerful, near-god celebrity or anomoly...you are just one of many, in a big, big world. You are just a young human rogue, that's it... Just a young human rogue trying to make your way in this big, crazy world... You were just in the wrong place at the wrong time and saw some stuff you shouldn't have... And now you're caught in the middle of something sinister... And you need to find out what in a hurry... Before it's too late... (P.S. Good luck!)
Sakaki22 01-03-06, 12:36 AM	I've always had the personal want to play a character I came up with when Complete Warrior came out (I had the idea before, but wanted a 3.5 class) Qualin Bushido, the Kender Samurai. I'm yet to meet someone who doesn't groan at that idea, but I like it! A law abiding Kender who takes down theives, defends those that need defending, is somehow capable of demoralizing people, but being subconsciously tied to their nature, handling things he never knew he handled (I'd willingly give a DM full rights to my Sleight of Hand skill), then reprimanding himself for being a dirty thief. Alas, no lord would take a Kender Samurai, and neither would any DM I know.
Marty_and_Doc 01-03-06, 01:18 AM	umm, yeah i feel kinda dumb asking this but umm what is a kender
Cold Napalm 01-03-06, 01:23 AM	umm, yeah i feel kinda dumb asking this but umm what is a kender The most feared race in all creations... They are the "halfling" of the dragonlance world.
Koji 01-03-06, 01:26 AM	I hate it when characters try to go with the "Jack of all trades" thing. Our wizard wanted to be a necromancy, conjuration, and enchantment specialist who relied on having an army of summoned, reanimated, and controlled creatures along with a few golems for good measure. He also wanted to be a ninja. Like both at the same time. And was confused when his character concept didn't work out.
Cold Napalm 01-03-06, 01:35 AM	I hate it when characters try to go with the "Jack of all trades" thing. Our wizard wanted to be a necromancy, conjuration, and enchantment specialist who relied on having an army of summoned, reanimated, and controlled creatures along with a few golems for good measure. He also wanted to be a ninja. Like both at the same time. And was confused when his character concept didn't work out. But but minion master is like so easy...I mean you have the mind bender PrC...and a mage can be a ninja so easily...all you need is 2 spells. Invis and suspended silence. Bah your wizard player sucks hehe.
Koji 01-03-06, 01:37 AM	Haha, no his issue was that his BAB and hit points were terrible. I mean, what did he expect?
Cold Napalm 01-03-06, 01:46 AM	Haha, no his issue was that his BAB and hit points were terrible. I mean, what did he expect? Bah hit points only matter if you get hit and BAB only matter is they aren't helpless...what kind of stealth master ninja gets seen much less hit and fight in a fair fight? Like I said...bah useless.
Fiddlypoppin 01-03-06, 03:22 AM	Some of the most ill-fitting character concepts I've ever seen were for a recent campaign that I tried to run (and ended up dropping after one session). It was supposed to be an Eberron game based on Lords of Madness--lots of aberrations, weird circumstances, bad guys who vanish into puddles of goo--that whole thing. I was trying to get a feel in it like the Van Helsing movie with Hugh Jackman, where the party are vigilante hunters defeating a menace the public doesn't know about. I put a lot of effort into that game. Anyway, I digress. I don't think I need to put down all of the disappointments here, but I will mention the most eyebrow raising of them all. The "bookworm" character--like the smarmy monk in Van Helsing--who was supposed to be the brains of the outfit, telling everyone what they were fighting and how to take it down. I thought this was great, until it came time to play. I told him that he was a member of a secret organization whose purpose was to hunt and destroy aberrations and other monsters in order to keep society (and the world) safe. He was assigned to stick with a pair of PCs (part of my scheme to get the party together) as they went to investigate some problems in the lower levels of Sharn. Lightning strikes on a rainy night, a scream is heard from a nearby shop, and everyone--except the bookworm--runs in to help whoever's in trouble. The bookworm stays outside and just watches. He uses Unseen Servant to open one of the 2nd story windows and see what's going on. He hears a voice speaking in the equivalent of Undercommon (or whatever language I had it speak, I don't quite remember), and asks it in its own language about what's going on, etc. etc. blah blah blah. It replies back with some threatening statements ("We'll get to you soon enough," or whatever lame schtick I had that night). Now, at this point, the ENTIRE PARTY, with the exception of the bookworm, is upstairs fighting off the aberrations and trying to get to the young woman bleeding on the floor to try and save her before she's totally dead. The bookworm, by the way, is a Cloistered Cleric (Cleric variant from UA) with the only significant healing capability in the party. What does he do? His group (which he's been assigned to stick with) are upstairs fighting aberrations (which he and his organization are honor-bound to hunt and destroy at any and all opportunities). Someone is injured, and possibly dying, and the party could really use his help. So, what do you think he does? Why, he runs down the street to get the Sharn Watch, of course!! Screaming at the top of his lungs, "Help! Help! The Watch! The Watch!" Finally, he finds some Watchmen, and brings them back to the shop. By this time, the fight is over, one of the PCs is all but dead, another is unconscious, the aberrations have all either fled or turned into puddles of goo, and there's a dead woman on the floor. The rest of the party jumps out the window into the alley to try and avoid the Watch, and the awkward questions that will inevitably accompany their situation. They then all decide to head to an inn and recuperate, then try to figure out what's happening next--they decide to go talk with the Druid's superiors, who told him to come down here in the first place. Great! This'll get them in contact with the secret organization. The bookworm, meanwhile, stays with the Watch, fills out some paperwork, and acts the part of the good citizen for a couple of hours. Then, I ask him what he wants to do. Does he look for the people he was supposed to stick with? Nope. Does he go back to his superiors in the order and tell them what happened? Nope. What does he do? He decides he's going back to his room in the University district so he can go about his normal life. :uh-huh: Later, once the rest of the party ends up at the secret organization's HQ, a member of the order finds the bookworm and asks why he didn't stick with the group, why he worked with the Watch (when they try to keep a low profile), why he didn't come back to report once he confirmed the presence of aberrations, and what he was doing back at his study ignoring that the whole thing happened? To make a long story short, the game died after that session. A couple of other players gave me headaches all night long, too, but that one still baffles me. What was he doing? Was he playing an NPC? The only thing I can figure is that he had been playing Half-Ogre Barbarians for so long, that his idea of a "characterful PC," especially one that eschewed combat, was to play a PC-NPC. Threw me for a loop... Oh well... I guess that's a rant more than anything, but... /rant Thank you for your patience (or lack thereof).
tsuyoshikentsu 01-03-06, 03:58 AM	Hey. You're not supposed to talk about it. It's okay. I'm a member. Snarf, snarf, fellow child of the 80s. snarf, snarf... I would like, as a child of the 90s, to point out that Thundercats was on Toonami for a while, and I therefore cry out... "Thunder... Thunder... Thunderstaff, HOOOOO!" every time I play one in M:tG. Especially against Zombie decks. On topic: First off, I REALLY want to make a Commoner 1/Survivor 5/Fighter 4/Monk 2/Streetfighter X Drow named Tyler Do'Urden now. In Ravenloft. So he fails a Madness save and develops MPD. How's THAT for a horrible concept? Now, more terrible concepts: Interestingly enough, a child Druid with Dragon Form named Haku does NOT warrant an invitation to my group. Anything that involves the words "Liu Kang." ESPECIALLY if there's screaming involved. Anything that involves Perform (Mime).
Eksem 01-03-06, 07:10 PM	Aw come on. Like none of you ever played an orc sorcerer named Gandalf, adventuring to save princesses from... well, whatever problems they were in. Actually, thats a pretty good concept... maybe I should revive it. A Shreck type character, you know? But with a couple of spells. Yeah, that really sounds quite good to me. And with a donkey familiar. I think i've got a campaign here...
lesliweird 01-04-06, 10:32 AM	Me: hey, I'm gonna run a level ten dungeon crawl in a couple of weeks. What do you want to be? Player: Oh! Oh! I know! Master transmogrifist! Me (looking things up): Ooookay, I guess that's not as bad as it could be. You know you don't get any of the special abilities of the monsters you can't polymorph above 9hd? Player: Yeah I know. My favorite shapes are going to be Wyvern, Chimera, and Umber Hulk Me (head reeling trying to figure out how I'm going to deal with all the tunnelling the umber hulk can do): ....I guess that's cool. insert two weeks of lovingly crafting a dungeon for these guy. Me: Everybody ready? Player: Not me, I have to roll up a character. Me: You're going to be a transmogrifist. You told me so two weeks ago. You were really excited. Player: Yeah, but it turned out it wasn't as powerful as I wanted. (whereupon he spends an hour and a half looking through splatbooks and then ends up choosing straight up blaster sorceror.) Me: are we ready now? Player: Oh, also, I don't wear any clothes... so... yeah, it all went well in the end, but he spent a lot of time wiggling his genetalia at the NPCs... who were mostly nuns.
tsuyoshikentsu 01-04-06, 10:00 PM	Anything involving the word "naked" in the "Conceptualizing a Character" step is banned from my group by DM fiat.
Leibel 01-04-06, 10:24 PM	Some stuff is funny even if it's a DM's nightmare. I have to second(or triple?) the no Kender comment. No klepto-communist child race. I was talked into doing a 1/2 vampire and Lycanthrope group(I was drunk at the time I promise) and the PC's were supposed to keep their true nature's a secret. First of all they run into an elf wizard woman looking for these spiffy magical artificts and I drop a million hints that she's a vampire but they don't figure it out. Secondly they are in the underdark with a cute 20 something human husband/wife and some lizardfolk protecting a businessman who was looking to see if there was mithral in the area. The PC's end up trying to ambush some monsters while everyone else botch the ambush and the creatures run away from where everyone else is sleeping but the "brilliant" PC's force them to run in the direction of everyone else waking them up - and the PC's were in hybrid form. Not only that they wondered they got shot at and to get to the end the nearby city's population fled in panic. No more evil campaigns for me unless they are LE.
Asmodeous_IX 01-05-06, 12:43 AM	1. 93 year old commoner that cant walk 2. 1001 chars that dont speak common or any widley understood language
trashdog 01-05-06, 01:02 AM	Right now I've got a party in Eberron, and I generally like all the PC's, but I was informed that if there is ever a TPK (which I doubt) they will all return as a super-group of Dhakaani goblin ninjas hell-bent on revolution. God help me.
ubernex 01-05-06, 01:15 AM	Right now I've got a party in Eberron, and I generally like all the PC's, but I was informed that if there is ever a TPK (which I doubt) they will all return as a super-group of Dhakaani goblin ninjas hell-bent on revolution. God help me. I don't know about you but I might be willing to TPK 'em just to see that in action. Especially if they have a battle cry, or even better a theme song. I guess I've been pretty lucky so far, nothing that just screams "no-way" has even been handed to me, although I've had my share of bland PC's come my way. I think the folks I game with headed off the whole Kender issue at the pass. When those of us who tend to DM were world building we unanomously voted in the main unique feature of our game world: The Kender Inversion Field. Any Kender finding itself on that particular Prime Material Plane is instantly turned inside out. and exploded.
Tyler Do'Urden 01-05-06, 01:57 AM	A warforged soulknife named Rockman. Psionic Meditation, Greater Psionic Weapon, psychic strike, he can "charge up" for a round and "fire" his mindblade. Just to play along, any time he misses because of an armor or deflection bonus, his mindblade bounces off at a 45 degree angle. If you're not groaning yet, you need to play more video games.
FallenWyvern 01-05-06, 02:12 AM	lol, now after reading all of these, I should've let my player use his LG Drow Paladin. Doesn't seem so bad after reading some of these. Oh and to set it straight : Lionor - Leader of the Thundercats (Spelling, but you know who it is) Lionel - Train maker (Again spelling, I'm lazy) LIONELLE - Stupid dragon thing from dracomonicon. I HATE THOSE THINGS!
Quanta 01-05-06, 02:28 AM	A warforged soulknife named Rockman. Psionic Meditation, Greater Psionic Weapon, psychic strike, he can "charge up" for a round and "fire" his mindblade. Just to play along, any time he misses because of an armor or deflection bonus, his mindblade bounces off at a 45 degree angle. If you're not groaning yet, you need to play more video games. Does he have a riding dog that can transform into different modes of transportation?
Ryven 01-05-06, 03:35 AM	I got to play a halfling cleric of Yondalla for a few sessions. It was great, she acted like everyone's mother and fought with a big cast iron frying pan. Someone right now in a group I'm in is playing a half green dragon troll trip-monger. And it's one of the variant trolls from MM3. Alls I know is that he's trying to make his character invincible to every sort of damage. It's ridiculous. In my Swashbuckling game, I had a Courtier Psion. His name was Bernaize. He laughed like "BWA HA!" and fought with a pansy little warfan. And his psionic abilities. It cracked me up every time we'd play. "Don't get saucy with ME, Bernaize!"
bhu 01-05-06, 04:23 AM	The worst character iv'e ever seen was a simple human thief. Played by the most incredibly stupid man I have ever known. This was in first edition when only Thieves had the Hide In Shadows ability. He always ensured that he carried the parties torch. Because light sources cast shadows. So as long as he was holding the torch, he could hide in shadows. :twitch: Logic meant nothing to him :uh-huh: In 3.5 however, my reward goes to a Monk. This guy wants to play a human Monk thats Lawful Evil. When asked why Lawful Evil, he says he has to be Lawful to be a Monk, nad Evil will actually free him from any restrictions so he can play a human being instead of an archetype. :confused: nd because if any of the characters want to throw down it makes it easier to kil them if he's evil :banghead: He then attempts to do his best to become a Were-Tiger, selling his soul in the process. The Gm explains to him over and over that he cant become a Were tiger because of the level adjustment, or if he does, he doesnt go up in level until he earns the xp necessary to offset the adjustment. He complains for weeks, and th4e GM finally grants him lycanthropy. And by way of revenge makes him a Were-Kitten instead of a Tiger. :looloo: At least we assume it was revenge. Said Monk then begins attempting to murder a party member he has never introduced himself too (they dont even know each others names, but they hang out with the same people) for no better reason than the fact that he can. This fails. ALong the way an evil sorcerer who happens to be a noble high up in the campaign city ticks off the monk, so he burns his house down in broad daylight, does a little dance in front, and flips off a crowd of about 50 witnesses. Have I mentioned the house belonged to a local noble? he justified this by saying he was evil. Tried arguing circular logic when we pointed out he was LAWFUL evil, and his character had a pretty good Int and Wis and could not possibly be this stupid. Then he had he nerve to be surprised when the city guard arrested him and held him for trial. :censored: At which point he stopped playing the monk, and came back with some sort of half human half bear fighter.
ConfessorX 01-05-06, 04:49 AM	I've always had the personal want to play a character I came up with when Complete Warrior came out (I had the idea before, but wanted a 3.5 class) Qualin Bushido, the Kender Samurai. I'm yet to meet someone who doesn't groan at that idea, but I like it! A law abiding Kender who takes down theives, defends those that need defending, is somehow capable of demoralizing people, but being subconsciously tied to their nature, handling things he never knew he handled (I'd willingly give a DM full rights to my Sleight of Hand skill), then reprimanding himself for being a dirty thief. Alas, no lord would take a Kender Samurai, and neither would any DM I know. I gotta say that if your willing to let me have rights with background stuff..such as mysterious things popping up in your pouches and maybe costing you face ( aka honor ) than id be all for that...thats the sign of a true role player and in my group..thats what we are. But back in the days..man ive had some very weird stuff...but the weird stuff never unbalanced as a kender...but I LIKE this idea..and with an Asian culture in my world..could just work out...
ConfessorX 01-05-06, 05:14 AM	Ok..This isnt about topping anyone..and while this isnt the worst concept ive heard in my 16 years of gaming..it was the most shocking to me. I honestly had a guy who was brand new to both the game and my campaign, want to play ( and this is after hours of pouring over my 2e and 3.5e books ) want to play a Male half elf ranger........WERE WOMAN Just to see the looks on the other players faces when they realize the lil trull they picked up at the local tavern and spent a night with was really Fredricus the half elf ranger Now theres role playing and then theres "role playing" and thats just diving into issues I wasnt even ready for...lol
ressurrector 01-05-06, 05:20 AM	Ok..This isnt about topping anyone..and while this isnt the worst concept ive heard in my 16 years of gaming..it was the most shocking to me. I honestly had a guy who was brand new to both the game and my campaign, want to play ( and this is after hours of pouring over my 2e and 3.5e books ) want to play a Male half elf ranger........WERE WOMAN Just to see the looks on the other players faces when they realize the lil trull they picked up at the local tavern and spent a night with was really Fredricus the half elf ranger Now theres role playing and then theres "role playing" and thats just diving into issues I wasnt even ready for...lol You just reminded me of something. This isn't a character concept, this is what actually ended up happening to my character (beware of DMs who like "Ranma 1/2" too much...) Defeated an amazon woman in single combat (while unarmed), and ended up being married to her. We did not have a single language in common. Fell into a cursed lake around an island we needed to get to, now he turns into a war horse when splashed with cold water, and turns back with warm. Actually a usefull skill at times, but still... That ended up being a pretty messed up campaign, one of my characters kids used him as a mount for one encounter...
ff6shadow 01-05-06, 05:25 AM	I've always had the personal want to play a character I came up with when Complete Warrior came out (I had the idea before, but wanted a 3.5 class) Qualin Bushido, the Kender Samurai. I'm yet to meet someone who doesn't groan at that idea, but I like it! A law abiding Kender who takes down theives, defends those that need defending, is somehow capable of demoralizing people, but being subconsciously tied to their nature, handling things he never knew he handled (I'd willingly give a DM full rights to my Sleight of Hand skill), then reprimanding himself for being a dirty thief. Alas, no lord would take a Kender Samurai, and neither would any DM I know. I'd allow it , for the simple fact that anybody insane enough to consider it is either a genius roleplayer, or a moron who'd be kicked out 5 minutes into the first session.
ConfessorX 01-05-06, 05:25 AM	You just reminded me of something. This isn't a character concept, this is what actually ended up happening to my character (beware of DMs who like "Ranma 1/2" too much...) Defeated an amazon woman in single combat (while unarmed), and ended up being married to her. We did not have a single language in common. Fell into a cursed lake around an island we needed to get to, now he turns into a war horse when splashed with cold water, and turns back with warm. Actually a usefull skill at times, but still... That ended up being a pretty messed up campaign, one of my characters kids used him as a mount for one encounter... I gotta say the characters kids using him as a mount was icing on the cake...lol
ressurrector 01-05-06, 05:40 AM	I gotta say the characters kids using him as a mount was icing on the cake...lol Yeah, and he kicked my character too... You want to hear the real icing? My characters kids+wife were kidnapped by the BBEGs, and he didn't find them again till 15 years later in game. When he did find them again, he was ECL 15 (+2 LA for a half-dragon variant race, half-bone dragon) His kids were also ECL 15 at that point, and had better gear than he did. He was 9' tall, and his wife was 5-6', only one of his kids was shorter than he was, and that was the male kid. Yeah, and I'm not even going into what the amazon thought about my character turning into a horse... :uh-huh: :bigeyes: :yuck: :surrender :censored:
Sulaco 01-06-06, 10:49 AM	Any that being "It is based on a character in this uber-kewl anime..." or "So my PC is a good drow ranger with two scimitars, but I swear he isn't based on Drizzt...". :rolleyes:
Asmodeous_IX 01-06-06, 11:56 AM	Sulaco, nice spoiler a little off topc but i felt it had to be said
Sakaki22 01-06-06, 12:06 PM	ConfessorX and ff6shadow: I'm glad to see that at least two people can accept interesting role playing ideas! Every DM I know has either laughed and thought it was a joke, sighed and said no, or said "NO KENDER" (which is reasonable). It is a character that has alot of roleplay potential, and as a forced Lawful class, alot of potential for interesting situations to roleplay out of. BTW, I firmly believe a Kender player should give up handling rights to the DM. It lets the DM tell him/her what they have "found" in their pouches next time they look (And of course Qualin has pouches!), and if the DM gets skills involved, lets the player be surprised with the trouble they get into! If a DM didn't take handling into their control, I'd just Sleight of Hand at random and feign ignorance to doing it as a character. Unfortunately for my players, the campaign I plan to do (release date: I'm on it, I swear I'm not posting on the forum, I'm writing epic adventures, SHUT UP!!!) will have a desert environment using asian classes instead of their core variants. I also planned on Halflings being from this region, and have no problem with a small Kender society..... Other odd character ideas of mine included a Monk who, after encountering and discussing/traveling with/seeking enlightenment alongside a Paladin, took up the sword along with the Whirling Steel Strike feat in a non-Eberron setting and an anthropomorphic cat wizard who, through homebrew magical artifacts, somehow possessed every non-neutral alignment with all of the negatives of each, none of the positives, had to follow taint and sanity rules, and liked melee a bit too much for her own good (She only died once somehow. Death by Thorns and a save roll of a 1 :weep: ). The campaign ended abruptly, but I think she ended up revising the Necronomicon and somehow ticked off Cthulhu.
bhu 01-07-06, 12:57 AM	one of the players in my silly campaign wants to be Ray, the hamster form the Blockbuster commercials
ressurrector 01-07-06, 01:14 AM	I'm about to start playing in a 1st lvl group, with a warlock. I was debating weither or not to have him hide all of his "dark" powers from everyone (meaning act as a weak fighter) or not. Or possibly have him not use them through personal choice, since he's C/G.
Kalanth 01-07-06, 01:33 AM	I had a guy ask me if he could be a Half-Celestial Human Mystic who wielded a Choas Blade that would slowly eat his sanity and turn him evil. Oh, and he felt that all humanoids, excluding himself only, were inferiour and did not need saving because they should not exsist in the first place. He was a real team player, can't you tell?
SolemnDusk 01-07-06, 10:43 AM	Sigh... admittedly, they first campaign I ever ran I DM-PC'd a Half-Dragon (Silver) Samurai/Psion... Anyway... I'm playing in a smallish group now, so I'm DM-PC'ing again... I've already planned everything for my character up to 20th level... Lawful Good Male Psionic Githzerai Monk 7/Samurai 3/Psionic Fist (Fist of Zuoken) 10 Ancestral Daisho will consist of... Time - Keen Mindfeeder Soulbreaker Deep Crystal Katana +3 Space - Throwing and Teleporting Great Dislocater Mundane Crystal Wakizashi +4 ...and after we start planewalking, I'm grabbing a .45 caliber Colt single-action revolver A.S.A.P. As much crap as this seems, however, our party is quite good at roleplaying, and we don't have any powergamers in the group... I am admittedly the worst, but I don't spend hours poring over every way to make my character stronger... it's just a bizarre amalgamation of all of my favorite things. We also have... A male Aasimar (sp?) Bard/Cleric whose player is the best at roleplaying out of our group - he is our leader, and he rocks, really does a good job with everything... A female Human Monk who is rather sheepish, played by my wife... An apparently evil female Elf Rogue who is veeeeeeeerrrry easy, but has a penchant for slaying her seductees during the throes of passion, which I believe just earned her the nickname Black Widow... And a male Thri-Kreen Psychic Warrior who is going to soon change characters (we determined how/why and stuff) and play a male Human Samurai who eventually will be Samurai 3/Psychic Warrior 2/Pyrokineticist 5/Iaijutsu Master 10... I even made up a custom weapon ability for him... Energy Projection (Any other name ideas?): This ability can only be applied to a melee weapon. When the command word is spoken, the weapon glows with heatless flames. The weapon can be used to make ranged attacks with a range increment of 10 feet. The weapon never actually leaves the weilder's hand(s); it projects a wave of energy at the target. Unlike a normal thrown weapon, the weilder does not add their strength bonus when rolling for damage. In any case, sure, we have an odd mix, but nothing that's groan-able, IMHO. Wow, I just typed a lot... yeesh.
Cold Napalm 01-07-06, 10:48 AM	I'm starting to cringe at the I wanna be a blah ba blah ba blah pacifist blah. Gah, why can nobody play one of these and not be either a complete political jack ass or I'm the innocent kid...oh protect me. Sigh.
Arco Versipellis 01-07-06, 10:55 AM	I had a guy that wanted to be an undead-fighting paladin that rode on a celestial griffion mount while weilding an intelligent lance with leadership.. about seven times total (his cohorts were to have cohorts). His first cohort was simple enough, a cleric who focused on fighting undead. Then he wanted a poison dusk lizardfolk poison-user (to indirectly follow a paladin). He was then to have a telepath and a werewolf... Of course, this guy had trouble making characters sheets on his own and didn't see why his paladin shouldn't be involved with a guy who used poison or why that was uneffective against fighting the undead in the first place. the weapon wasn't to much of a big deal, although he was determined to not settle for anything less than special purpose with greater powers. The mount wasn't a huge deal either, except for he wanted the griffion way to early and then was unhappy when I told her of its delayed improvement. Not only did this character require way to much work on my part, he was destined to be handicapped by all those wasted leaderships. I love the feat, but what good is a level four cohort when your PC is level eight. Also, since his paladin and cleric builds (the only two he actually made it to), were so focused that against anything other than undead (not my favorite choice of monster), he was just about doomed, forcing me to use those enemies. Even more to my dislike, he did not want to be a Radiant Severant of Perlor, despite actually wanting the class for his cohort. He wanted to be a Radiant Severant of (the Christian) God. Now, I suppose he had some issues with proclaiming to follow a fake god, but personally, I prefer to stick with a fake mythology-style religion that does not set me, as the DM, up to play the Alpha and Omega. This is a make-believe game and I feel that it is best to leave real-life religion out of it. Luckily, he couldn't (as he still can't) stick with a central idea. (His previous werewolf barbarian took his first level of druid at level nine or ten, despite my warnings, and then he wanted to back track. His current swashbuckler decided he really wanted some levels in rogue and missed the bonus skill points at first level, which are desperately needed in my campaign. Skills rock and such.) Before he made it past level seven, he abandoned the character.
battlecat1 01-07-06, 12:11 PM	In every game we play (be it d20 Modern, DnD, Star Wars, whatever), the same male player wants to play a carbon copy of the same character concept - a beautiful female, who is either a deposed princess, or a disenfranchised aristocrat. We did a 28 point buy for Eberron, and he/she wound up with an 18 in Charisma. And nothing else. Nothing. I'm all about good roleplaying, but it really not even a factor in this scenario. It does, however, make him/her crazy when the other PC's start screaming (during combat) "You can't hit me! I'm SOOOOOO deposed!".
Airsucker 01-10-06, 02:30 AM	Now I don't feel so bad for coming up with a slightly mad, fire-obcessed, outcast female dwarven sorcorer with a badger familiar. :D
ressurrector 01-10-06, 02:41 AM	My DM just asked me to make my new character (Warlock) Evil, in a party where everyone's Good or Neutral. And I'm supposed to keep it totally secret. I can tell this is going to be interesting.
Vaalingrade Ashland 01-10-06, 03:07 AM	This is why I hate going to cons: Shortly after the release of Eberron (As in days), I was at a con, running a few games under my normal rules: - level 6 - no Paladins (swear to gods, I'll boot you if you try) - no psionics - no gnomes (because I already have halflings in my world) - Core only -- no homebrew, CS, or splats. The rules were clearly posted in red pen on the sign up sheet. Along with: "This campaign will be centered around the infiltration and quite extraction of a political prisoner. Please keep this in mine during character generation. What did I get? - A third level gnome Paladin - A 6th level Kalashar psion (keep in mind that not only was this a rare Core only game for me, but mere days after the CS came out) - a 6th level gnome evoker - a 2nd level half-green dragon (we're okay so far... ECL 5-6 depending) were-bear (wait a minute...) human barbarian (because barabarian screams infiltration) Its... as if they conspired against me.