Post/Author/DateTime	Post
monkofpassion 02-15-06, 04:31 PM	Once again, not sure this is 100% origonal, but here it goes. Please add any story you have about it. 1. keeping a sea elf above water for prolonged periods of time is not a good idea ( we were trying to interigoate it and it was the only person we know of that had th einformation we needed).
Darkuwa 02-15-06, 04:37 PM	2. Don't walk ahead of the rogue and wizard checking for trap. Not because setting of the traps will kill you, but because your party will tie you up.
Tiefling_Warlock 02-15-06, 04:43 PM	This is what happened to my friend but oh well.... 3) You do not jump down and attack the orc barbarian who's raging, at full life, with a sythe when you are not profitient with it, and you are a wizard without any more spells, and no mage armor.
Lionhearted 02-15-06, 05:15 PM	(real story) 4) do not charge alone into a camp of about 100 experienced hobgoblin warriors, and do not expect your group members to follow you when you do. even if you got 50+ AC (its a little thing called grapple, and gay pile) do however underestimate your mage, who will save you with a efreeti wish
Pandaemoni 02-15-06, 05:22 PM	5) I learned that, when your 5th-level Thief character encounters a randomly generated old green dragon when treking cross-country on foot, sometimes your DM just expects you to walk away (especially if that DM has kindly ruled the dragon was asleep at the time). The DM might not expect you to try to sneak in and steal from the dragon's horde. Moreover, the DM might rule that the dragon wakes up when you try it and then make you re-roll a new 1st-level character.
Shaggy_Shaggs 02-15-06, 06:01 PM	6. Unless you are a monk, do not punch the tarrasque in the kneecap when you meet it. (Human werebear barbarian. The enemies recently had been mostly leveled up hobgoblins, orcs and such, and of course none of them could stand against me. I'd developed a "bigger than god" complex, the tarrasque encounter crushed that in a hurry, as well as digesting it.)
Herald@Large 02-15-06, 06:33 PM	7. If the King summons you and your party for a private audience, when it's your turn, do *not* say "I moon the King." 8. If a pile of treasure looks too nice to be true, it's probably an illusion. 9. When the DM has finished telling you all the treasure and XP you've just found/earned, *never* say "Is that all?" 10 Never trust a chortling DM.
9JACK9 02-15-06, 06:47 PM	#11: Don't bring a first level character to a third level game.
druidmaster312 02-15-06, 07:00 PM	don't **** the gods off
Deekin 02-15-06, 07:17 PM	#13 Buff before fighting the BBEG #14 When going to fight X, ask the Bookmaster if any of his books have good anti-x spells. #15 No plot survives
Cursed_poet 02-15-06, 07:19 PM	16. Never attack Large or larger creatures that look to have lot of constitution (and by that lot of Fortitude) with a spell requiring a Fort save, even less if the said spell have a range of touch , and you have low hp and no armor. 17. If you're the only one of your party to make the will save against the big dragon's frightful presence, don't try the beast by yourself, flee with them. 18. More ennemy, even if they are all Cr 1, mean more chance to hit and to criticalize your poor self. 19. Confidence is a straight path to quick death. 20. Never get within 60ft of a strange patch of goo. 21. Demons don't make a healthy snack even less uncooked. that was my 2 cp for now.
Morotis 02-15-06, 07:20 PM	22: A Chaos Roc, and a Chaotic Rock, are not the same thing! 23: That Flammable, and Inflammable, mean the same thing....
metamind 02-15-06, 07:27 PM	24: Everyone hates mindflayers for a reason 25: It turns out Nerul does not know why kids like cinnamon toast crunch either, but he sure gets ****** if you ask him...
Adam Smite 02-15-06, 07:29 PM	26. Do not walk through a moat with spearheads on the bottom when you could easily swim or, perhaps since you're a 20th level Ranger with Water Walk prepared, use that instead. 27. Do not break the glass covering the Demon that keeps saying "Free me and I will grant you your greatest desires." He will do no such thing, or will Dominate you into saying things that he wants to do anyways. 28. Even when properly armed, Rogues do not win against the undead.
Ridureyu 02-15-06, 07:31 PM	24: Everyone hates mindflayers for a reason 25: It turns out Nerul does not know why kids like cinnamon toast crunch either, but he sure gets ****** if you ask him... He does, however, know why kids like Apple Jacks even though they don't taste like apples or jacks. 26: If you can't think of a reason why the Inevitable would be chasing you, you are probably not its target. Do not attack it blindly.
Azezel 02-15-06, 07:42 PM	30: Don't bring a sword to a Magic fight. 31: A Folding Boat is not a weapon. 32: Water Breathing lasts two hours per level and not a moment longer.
Adam Smite 02-15-06, 07:51 PM	26: If you can't think of a reason why the Inevitable would be chasing you, you are probably not its target. Do not attack it blindly. If for some reason it declares a reason that makes no sense, it may still be best to run away. They generally don't listen to their target's pleas of innocence. 33. A Disembodied Brain telepath is a nigh-useless combatant. They do however take nigh-forever to kill.
Sgt_Slaughter943 02-15-06, 08:13 PM	34. that any kind of a fire spell and an alchemy lab with dragon breath potion makers doesn't mix AT ALL,in a very BAD way 35. don't keep praying to your god for a month straight(unless you like annoying gods, DON'T DO IT!!!!!!!!!)
Ridureyu 02-15-06, 08:14 PM	Yes, but if while it LOOKS like the Zelekhut is going after you, the town banker panics and tries to run, you can make an educated guess. 34. When your party sees an army of 3,000 hobgoblins training to attack a city, it is smarter to go warn the city than to take them on yourself. Also, the end result of trying to fight the hobgoblins is not "railroading."
Malruhn 02-15-06, 09:12 PM	^^ Renumbering 37. NEVER start a prayer for divine intervention with, "To whom it may concern..." 38. As DM, NEVER try to railroad. Use backwards planning and establish some set encounters... and STILL expect the players to outthink you for nearly everything you set up for them. 39. NEVER back yourself into a corner with the BBEG. If he is supposed to survive, DON'T let him go to the outhouse alone - or to bed alone - or to the treasure chamber alone... cuz if the PCs get to him, they WILL kill him exactly one round faster than you can get him teleported out to safety...
Birdman 02-15-06, 09:55 PM	40: A dwarf fighter in full-plate spiked army on a sloped floor leading into a pit, will not pass a balance check.(party member) 41: When trying to light skeletons on fire and they don't burn, put them out first. 42: When a wizard tells you to not heal yourself and fight the orge because"you can take it" dont listen.(read signature)
ressurrector 02-15-06, 10:14 PM	43: Just because your party is still arguing between: lighting something on fire, or, going inside; do NOT say "I'm tired of this! I kick open the door and go in!" 44: Green slime is not good a substitute for shampoo. (from above mistake)
LCD2YOU 02-15-06, 10:49 PM	45: An Ice Basilisk is not impressed by a 3rd level ranger who is trying to "Calm Animals" 46: 8 Str skinny human wizard (my character) can't go toe to toe with 18 Str. Dwarven Barbarian (fellow party member) in a fist fight. 47: 10 Wis Dwarven Barbarians sleep real good even at 4th level when the above 8 Str. (18 Int) Wizard casts Sleep and has Spell Focus and Greater Spell Focus for Enchantment
AdoGD 02-15-06, 11:13 PM	48. When in doubt, leave. 49. If some group wants to kill a fellow NPC, stay away from that NPC. 50. If the DM had a bad day at work don't ask for extra stuff. (learned the hard way) 51. Never trust a drow. 52. Don't open the door w/ all the wierd signs on it 53. Don't try to bribe the DM with only change, 99/100 times it won't work.
Twotall 02-16-06, 03:22 AM	54. Even though you've searched for traps in the entire dungeon without finding anything, don't ignore the last five feet leading up to the treasure because you're tired of not finding anything. Result: Secret walls collapse, two golems appear...
The Phantom Flan Flinger 02-16-06, 08:53 AM	55. If you catch up with the rest of the party to find the fighter holding a three foot pole, ask what happened to the other seven feet before jumping into the "water" to get to that shiny thing at the bottom.
jpat93 02-16-06, 09:12 AM	56. Medium > Small. 57. Don't be a 2nd-level halfling rogue in the line of an out-of-control raging human barbarian with Power Attack and Cleve. 58. Never trust an NPC who just wants to come along with the party. 59. "Talking to the monsters" is often less than successful, but it makes a good slogan for a party.
BlazeingWyrm 02-16-06, 04:53 PM	60. Never ask for random encounters. (learned through experience) 61. Don't let the WIS 5 INT 8 Rogue lead the party.
Kresalak 02-16-06, 05:26 PM	62. The Emerald Claw is not, in fact, a strip club. 63. Asking a vampire to just "pretend it is" is not a good idea. 64. After your party does the above two, you will be glad that you're a changling. 65. Cockatrices do not, in fact, taste like chicken. Also, they are poisonous when ingested.
Shaggy_Shaggs 02-16-06, 05:36 PM	DP
Shaggy_Shaggs 02-16-06, 05:36 PM	65. Cockatrices do not, in fact, taste like chicken. Also, they are poisonous when ingested. Haha, that one reminds me of one of my own screwups I'd forgotten about. 66. Punching and kicking at an escaped cockatrice, in order to take it alive for more reward money from its trainer, is not a good idea - Stone to Flesh costs more than the value of a live, half-trained cockatrice, doubly so if the depetrification kills you and you end up needing to throw in a Reincarnate.
Kiklio 02-16-06, 05:58 PM	67. Never Manyshot ragewalkers. Never Rapid Shot ragewalkers. Never Manyshot w/ Speed ragewalkers. You are better off slapping ragewalkers with your uber-bow than trying to shoot them.
Secrets Untold 02-16-06, 06:26 PM	68: NEVER tell the Balor your alignment. 69: NEVER confess to the paladin that you are LE, not LG. 70: DO NOT try to eat a black pudding. It's NOT made of dark chocolate.
Lionhearted 02-16-06, 07:20 PM	(another true story) 71) never put the a group of lvl 8 pc's against three "downsized" banshee's which they barely defeat (one of them almost lost his soul in the progress) then in the next room put a door thin as paper with a single glyph on it. (we spent the whole night arguing how to survive the door as we thought it was a über glyph, in the end we solved it with a knock spell :rolleyes: )
Landman 02-16-06, 10:34 PM	72. When the rest of your party is Good, they will not let you ransack the good-aligned town that has given you shelter and is currently under attack. 73. Free actions are only free until they start to **** off the DM
shaft350x 02-17-06, 01:48 AM	74: Know the details of your spells, like the target, duration, and if it is dispellable. Obscuring Mist + Werebadge = Lunchmeat
phelanarcetus 02-17-06, 01:19 PM	75: If you are a skinny and unarmored wizard, and a six-armed demon is next to you, do not just step back. Run for your damn life. 76: Do not seperate the party. Even if it seems like a really good idea. Best case, half the party will spend the day slaying demons and getting xp while the other half will spend the day buying oranges. Worst case, both halves will die horrible, horrible deaths. 77: Do not befriend blacksmiths, lest they be turned into undead and you be forced to destroy them. 78: If when you rescue a captured ally, you later encounter two of him, do not proceed. Do not pass Go, do not collect 200 gp. Do nothing at all until you have resolved which one is the evil clone just waiting to betray you at the worst possible moment, and eliminated him. If necessary, kill them both. 79: When a wizard has just finished some sort of spell duel involving powers far, far beyond your comprehension, and you notice that the artifact he's been using during it has an evil aura, do not walk up and and attempt to break it. 80: If you have an intelligent magical weapon, do not constantly use another one instead, unless you want to have problems. 81: If your DM collects character sheets between sessions, always check your sheet carefully for any new or removed items.
Kresalak 02-17-06, 01:52 PM	82. Though talking may be a free action, drawing up complex battle plans and chatting about the weather is not.
DevilJimmy 02-17-06, 02:45 PM	83. Do not insult the parties bard who has secretly been taking levels of assassin. 84. Do not fire a lightning bolt at a blue dragon disguised as an orc. 85. Do not let the evil cleric in the party destroy any of the slain NPC paladin's belongings before identifying them. (was a +5 keen holy avenger of frost) 86. Do not place anything in a bag of holding until it is identified. (was another bag of holding in disguise) 87. and finally...do not forget about the wall of flame that you cast in the giant's stronghold. made of wood. Long Live Dogface!!!
Deacon Liadon 02-17-06, 08:05 PM	88: ALWAYS have a ring of feather fall. Even if you can fly, have a ring of feather fall.
Kresalak 02-17-06, 08:37 PM	89. Shapechanging into a dragon so you can say "Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for thou art crunchy and taste good with ketchup" to a dragonslayer is a very bad idea. Also, it is important to remember that if you shapechange into something, you gain their type and favored enemy bonuses apply against you.
IrishRover 02-17-06, 08:40 PM	throw fire at the bad guy on top of a grain silo... The grain dust explosion can have a FAR greater blast radius than the original fireball
LCD2YOU 02-17-06, 09:08 PM	91: Cast Earthquake in a cavern with stalagtites.
green_yawgmoth 02-18-06, 12:45 AM	Don't play a spellcaster with LA, especially not in a lower level game, unless everyone's got an LA. Even if the stat boosts are really nice and you get claws, it's still not going to be worth it. http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v91/yawgmoth/kittyjig.gif
Suzaku455 02-18-06, 12:53 AM	But house rule that Kobolds have -1 LA ; ;
xvthreetwoonevx 02-18-06, 01:06 AM	Unless you allow Dragonwrought, of course. :)
BeregondoftheGuard 02-18-06, 01:52 PM	92) If you are in a fortress on the edge of Orc territory that rumour says is currently occupied by said Orcs, with open gates (busted open by the party), two unconscious trolls (again due to the party), and a rather large barracks with closed doors, do not say "I need to replenish my spells. Let's sleep before we go explore the barracks." Corollary: In the above situation, make sure you set a guard Yes, that's a true story
Darkmatter20 02-18-06, 02:59 PM	93) Remeber that just because you have come to a triggered pit trap, with a dead body just visible at the bottom, where you can see across the 10ft pit to the other side. Do not just assume that the DM would not place two pit traps side-by-side and attempt to jump across. Actually happened.
interpretivechaos 02-18-06, 04:26 PM	94) Always destroy skeletons/ corpses shackled to walls. If you're good give them a proper burial (or even better, cremation) 95) If a mage guild demands an artifact and offers you monetary recompense, accept it. Unless you think you can take on both the mage guild and everyone else who knows why they wanted it... 96) Every door- poke with ten foot pole, search, listen, think, and open 97) When removing loot, change as little as possible win doing so. Don't open it, untie it, put in on (Don't put it on). 98) Invest in a wand of Detect Magic and a wand of Identify. If it radiates magic, see what it is before doing anything. 99) If you don't know what is going to happen, don't do it. 100) Never presume you can win. It may just be a scrawny little rogue, but that scrawny little rogue may just throw a powder in your eyes and backstab you with a poisoned dagger 101) Make yourself very clear on your plans the first time you talk to the DM. If the DM misinterprets your plan in a suicidal manner, they are loathe to redo it the way you meant... 102) If the guy detects as evil, don't trust him. 103) Make sure you coordinate your diplomacy. Surrender and we'll let you live doesn't work well when the ranger is shooting down fleeing goblins. 104) Key knowledge checks to flavour checks. Old, falling apart- knowledge architecture. Strange eerie- Knowledge (arcana)/ knowledge (religion). The people seem to be running around hurried knowledge (local). 105) If you're in a teleporting door complex, leave a chalk mark to where you've been. 106) Never assume a portal leads to the same place it came from 107) Bind and gag a rogue that in a fit of self-loathing for a ton of dex damage went and got drunk on the wine you found. (Though this may have been merely a better idea as he found a rod of wonder... on second though no.) 108) Do not use a chest full of oil of impact/ other explosive volatile mixtures as a battering ram. 109) 500 gp goes a long way for a lot of useful alchemical goods 110) Remember that composite bows and reduce person do not mix (do to a highly annoying strength reduction) 111) Damage reduction does not apply to energy damage. One more reason to pack a couple alchemists fires 112) For the same reason as 111, ray of frost is not a worthless spell to burn a cantrip on 113) The enemy does crit. For that reason it's a good idea to get healed after every enounter, even if at the current rate it'll take a couple more encounters to wear you down. 114) Walking into disreputable parts of the town in heavy armour makes it really hard to chase down pickpockets- especially if they cut your belt and grab your sword. 115) If the DM looks at you in disbelief, do a double check of the common sense of your action. 116) Before you get too cocky, remember there is a lot more ways to take down characters than damage 117) There is no cap to the amount of subdual damage one can take before suffering ill consequences. Remember that when you're stashing a guard while sneaking in...
DaMullet 02-18-06, 06:58 PM	86. Do not place anything in a bag of holding until it is identified. (was another bag of holding in disguise) Actually, there are no ill effects toward placing a bag of Hlding inside another one. Just for Bags and Portable Holes. 118) When in a room that's 20 feet on a side, DO NOT cast fireball at the center, even if there are more enemies than PCs. 119) No matter how large the threat range on your longsword, you can't score a crit on undead or oozes.
ressurrector 02-18-06, 10:11 PM	Actually, there are no ill effects toward placing a bag of Hlding inside another one. Just for Bags and Portable Holes. I think it's extra-dimensional in-general. 118) When in a room that's 20 feet on a side, DO NOT cast fireball at the center, even if there are more enemies than PCs. Or throw oil of impact. (unless you have mastery of shaping) 119) No matter how large the threat range on your longsword, you can't score a crit on undead or oozes. Or constructs
DaMullet 02-18-06, 10:23 PM	RAW, it only specifically mentions Bags of Holding and Portable holes. Therefore, I assume you could place a Bag of Holding into another without ill efftect.
Kresalak 02-18-06, 10:26 PM	120. No matter how much damage you can do with a charge, you will roll a one sometimes. 120 b. You will roll a one 95% of the time.
DaMullet 02-18-06, 10:46 PM	120 c.) The 1 that you roll will, under 43% of circumstances fall on a roll such as disarm, trip, or grapple wherein you suffer what you are trying to do if you fail. 121) Traps that reset or are bypassed can and will be triggered on the way out, too.
Loki_God'o'Chaos 02-19-06, 12:52 AM	122. No matter how peaceful the forest is, no matter where it is geographically, even if its in the middle of an Elven Nation. Have a Sentry duty while people sleep 123. Kobolds and Goblins dont like to be mistaken for one another....Especially in large groups 124. Ninjas and Assassins arent the same thing, and a Ninja should never be called a "common assassin" 125. No matter how powerful your mage is, the DM is always more powerfull 126. Being Irish in a D&D game is never to your benefit 127. It is always the Butler, Lacky, or Kender that did it 128. Nazis and D&D should not mix (Played with a History major once, and he was studing WWII) 129. Vanaras arent Monkeys, and their tales are not prehensile, no matter what you say, THEY ARENT! 130. No matter how much you love Ctuthulu.......never summon him to aide you..........EVER..........it is not a good idea.............No matter who you are 131. Having the Hand of Vecna and the Blade of Kas will cause nothing but wide spread destruction 132. Destroying a Staff of the Archmagi, will kill you, your friends, you loved ones, and everyone one ina 200d20 x5000 mile radius, no matter what plane they are on 133. When calling for help from another plane, be specific on who you wish for 134. Never wish for that help to be Chuck Norris
shadowmimiiru 02-19-06, 01:01 AM	135) Never ever tell the DM you're bored 136) Never ever tell the DM her games are too short. The result of either of these is a 20 hour straight game in which you're entire party is under constant assualt from an army of Zombies that can only be killed by calling a head shot. And when I say army I mean tens of thousands.
ghost_image 02-19-06, 02:43 AM	137:......how AoO worked :ghosted:
Tristan 02-19-06, 03:09 AM	138) Just because your party beats a Huge scorpian, dont think there isnt a mimic hiding behind him 139)whe the mimic grabs your spellcaster, help the spellcaster 140)in above situation, do not forgo helping the spell caster to attempt to grapple the mimic 141) after 140, do not punch the mimic, after your 2nd hand gets stuck, do not knee the mimic, after your knee gets stuck, do not knee the mimic, after your second knee gets stuck, do not kick the mimic, after your foot gets stuck, do not kick the mimic, after your other foot gets stuck, do not headbut the mimic ^said example was embarissing 142) just because your CE pixie warlock decideds to shoot the wyvern saying "When he looks around after I shoot him, he will see you, not me" doesnt mean you can't just run away, or hide 143)Just because an encounter's CR is equal to the party level, doesnt mean a wyvern's poison cant kill. 144)When in a cave comunity full or allies originally designed to fight you, do not throw a bottle of alchemist fire at the pixie to "Show the bystandards where he is". This will result in you alienating yourself as well as the CE pixie, resuliting in a chain lightning 145) (I guess this doesnt fit here, but what the hell) Just because you and the pixie both get chain lightninged, doesnt mean you cant get away, and he falls to the ground an invisible lifeless corpse
Evil DM Mk3 02-19-06, 03:44 AM	124. Ninjas and Assassins arent the same thing, and a Ninja should never be called a "common assassin" Nor should an assassin. They are far from "Common". 146) If you know that your DM is a fan of certain myths and literature (Say the Mabinogion (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Welsh_mythology) and Terry Prattchetts Discworld) and has based gods and cities on them, it may be a good idea to at least read a synopsis of these, esspecially if you live in the city and worship one of the gods. 147) It is still metagaming if it reduces the parties standing. It just doenst make anyone like you. 148) Repeated natural 20s happen, even to elven wizards fighting oger barbarians in melee. 149) NEVER ignore the correct funeral rights of a departed party member. 150) If you take over the running of a city, esspecially a small one, expect "Third Doctor" syndrome where all the nasites you usually bump into now home in on you. Don't sell you armour to fund a private spa. Don't spend all your loot on art. You still need magic items.
ObsidianIchor 02-19-06, 04:07 AM	151. Never (as a player) go to the bathroom in the middle of a crucial group decision, no matter how obvious the solution might seem to you. ...bad things happened twice because of that. Needless to say, one of those situations ended in the only time my DM ended a session prematurely because he needed to prepare for something unexpected. Lets just say we basically handed ourselves over to the BBEG. I tried to end it once I realized what they were doing (getting teleported to the BBEG's stronghold). I jumped out of the teleportation circle, but unfortunately was still captured and brought there anyway...at least I didn't just hand myself over.
BadCatMan 02-19-06, 04:58 AM	152: Never jump through a portal without checking to see where it leads first. 153: Always put ranks in Swim, even if you are a dwarf who spent his entire life underground, and especially if wear full-plate and a heavy load. (Because unknown portals will probably lead to water-traps.) 154: Don't claim how smart and wise your character is, then go 'meh' and drink a strange potion, which the DM thinks is poetic justice to change into Feeblemind. 155: Don't assume that the Chaotic Neutral "I can do whatever I like" munchkin player is going to improve some day or that he has limits on his bad behaviour. 156: Don't use your minmaxing skills to make such a player a better built, more powerful character, in case he decides to attack you. 157: Don't try Sleight of Hand unless you are really really good at it. 158: Don't expect that what you've said OOC will be easily taken as such. 159: Don't assume that the DM might actually do something to rescue his campaign after he's been ramming it into the ground all year. 160: A strange sword stuck in stone is stuck there for a very good reason and ought to be left there.
PrincessLauren 02-19-06, 05:03 AM	161. Dragons can fly; it helps to look up occasionally. Particularly when you left a white dragon for dead (need I say it wasn't?). 162. Don't cast 'create water' anywhere near a thoqqua. 163. The CG character will do weird things sometimes. Grin and bear it, and remember which pocket he keeps his magical items in just to facilitate looting later. 164. It's a bad idea to chase the cartful of twenty zombies on your own.
Sgt_Slaughter943 02-19-06, 10:36 AM	165. NEVER, EVER let a NPC Kender(played by the DM no less) into your party especially when it can get you PC killed.
TokTok 02-19-06, 11:18 AM	166. One-trick-pony players can not or are really hard to convince to play something else. (I'm seriously going to slaughter that fire elf spellcaster of his...)
Evil DM Mk3 02-19-06, 03:18 PM	167: Never come up with a REALLY REALLY cool idea for somthing bad that might just be about to happen and say it out loud.
Loki_God'o'Chaos 02-19-06, 07:55 PM	165. NEVER, EVER let a NPC Kender into your party especially when it can get you PC killed. Ahem, I detest that one, I think you should make note about the DM being a jerk there 168. Never Allow anyone with an IQ of under 120 play a Kender, especially outside of the setting it was designed for. 169. Before donning robes of the archmage, check the color. 170. Check the hair color on your underground dwarves, Duergar and Derro have completely different hair colors 171. Half Celestials and Half Fiends should never be in the same party, no matter what alignment they are currently, eventually all hell will break lose. 172. Being decended from Dragons and/or Outsiders is not a good thing, no matter how many bonuses you get. 173. Never grab the Gold Orb, Ever
ConclaveKing 02-19-06, 09:03 PM	174: Never get up to use the bathroom and leave your character sheet behind. I got back and my PC had a -10 STR penalty. 175: Never get the DM ****** off. I found myself staring into the face of a dragon. While I was level one.
shadowmimiiru 02-19-06, 09:20 PM	176) Never lend your DM your collection of Anglo Saxen epic poetry. 177) When after you do the above and hear in a tavern about a king who's hall is being invaded every night, do go to help the king. 178) Never steal a jewel encrusted goblet out of an "empty" barrow. 179) Never, NEVER fight an ancient Gold Dragon on your own ... just give back 178 later shadow
DeeL 02-19-06, 10:28 PM	180: 'Never split the party.' It's been said before. Here's another set of circumstances under which you should not split the party - when you have discovered a Kuo-toa city that's guarding a demonic artifact with a force that includes more than 50 kuo-toa and at least 3 trolls, and your party has no more spells of any kind, your hp are already low, and the paladin has run out of Lay on Hands support. And if you do split thte party, do not contrive to wind up facing the entire enemy force at once. Especially when the DM has already explicitly stated that he doesn't expect you to take on the entire enemy force. 181: When you create a ranger with a so-so Con score, do not choose the melee weapons option no matter how good your strength is. Unless you really enjoy winding up with -1 or lower hp every single time you try to go toe to toe with anything, which is the only way you can do decent damage.
Kresalak 02-20-06, 12:37 AM	182. Being able to dish out hundreds of damage per round in melee WILL NOT HELP against incorporeal banshees.
Agile_thieve 02-20-06, 08:03 AM	183. When fighting death in a tower, do not jump out the window, he can fly and go through walls 184. Blizzard, earthquake, and other larger AoE spells are not good in a small cave
Adaephon 02-20-06, 11:05 AM	185: Never wear full plate on the top of a tower during a thunderstorm. Esspecially when your DM's in a bad mood.
LCD2YOU 02-20-06, 12:24 PM	#185 sounds more like good physics than anything else. #186: When gaming with your girlfriend, never let your PC get "friendly" with another female player's PC, even if your girlfriend decided that your character and hers would just not like each other. #187: Female DMs can be the trickiest of all DMs.
Lionhearted 02-20-06, 02:25 PM	188. there is two types of dm, the "i dont give a :censored: about logic, its in the rules" and the "i dont giva a :censored: about the rules, its my world" don't ever underestimate any of them if one of the player happen to be the a logic maniac, DONT under any cirumstances let him in a discussion of any of those DM's (B is only applied to rule lawyners)
Ace the Dead 02-20-06, 04:06 PM	189. Do not show your powergaming friend any powerful builds of your own. He will thank you, use them, and everyone will assume he came up with it on his own. 190. If the cave is carpeted with skulls, your saves aren't high enough. 191. 11th lvl PCs can and will kill CR 16 NPCs without taking damage. They can do this more than 1 time in a single day. 192. Never give the PCs time to prepare & a suprise round, not if you want to damage them. 193. If you plan on being a halfling rog/ftr/master thrower, do not put an 8 in wisdom. 195. Holy is the best enhancement you can get for your weapon. 196. 2 Handed adamantine weaons + power attack make lockpicks an inefficent way to open doors. 197. It is better to be lucky than good.
Wraithburn 02-20-06, 04:27 PM	198) Robes of Scintillating Colors dont actually Scintilate until you command them to. (Bye bye 10th level wizard..just like that) 199) Identify the Cloak of Poison BEFORE you put it on. 200) When an NPC is asking you how he can reward your party for doing good deeds...pay attention and do not blurt out "Do you have any jars?". 201) Dont insist on swimming in The River Styx....... 202) Let the Baatezu and the Tannaari do their own thing...dont try to mediate......
speeblefreak 02-20-06, 05:14 PM	158: Don't expect that what you've said OOC will be easily taken as such. 158b. If your DM is in a bad mood because the players have been joking around all day, and the PCs just released an uber-plague upon themselves, do NOT say, even OOC, "I start rubbing myself on everything." 203. If you are fighting a way-too-easy encounter, you WILL roll lots of natural 1s. 204. If you have a cursed sword, you WILL roll lots of natural 1s. 205. 203 and 204 mix in a very bad way. 206. If you are at a graveyard, and you see people digging a pit next to the graves, and the people suddenly start screaming and dying, and you see a jar with a brain inside at the bottom of the pit, do NOT spend your surprise round casting Detect Poison. (posted by Green Yawgmoth) Don't play a spellcaster with LA, especially not in a lower level game, unless everyone's got an LA. Even if the stat boosts are really nice and you get claws, it's still not going to be worth it. 207. And do NOT let that LA +2, 1st-level sorceror get anywhere NEAR a grell. 208. Paladins are immune to disease. Disease and paralysis are NOT the same thing. 209. Do NOT have your familiar chase a hostile, trigger-happy psion who knows energy ray. 210. Do NOT spread your levels equally between wizard and ranger at low levels and expect to have decent magical firepower. 211. If the DM says, "I'm testing this monster for the first time," you will probably die. 211b. If the DM says, "these monsters" instead of "this monster," you are toast. 212. If you have a cursed sword, you die and are offered a resurrection deal, you had better expect the sword to work into it in a bad way. 213. NEVER say out loud, "I can only fail on a natural 1." You will always be right in the wrong way. 214. If you get a magical dagger that gives you visions of a balrog coming out of said dagger, don't keep using it. 215. Rod of Wonder = BAD
Fenris78 02-22-06, 08:34 AM	216. When you're carrying a glaive, a warhammer, a bastard sword, a hand axe and a heavy flail, 2 hands are just never enough :(
v2099 02-22-06, 09:54 AM	135) Never ever tell the DM you're bored 136) Never ever tell the DM her games are too short. The result of either of these is a 20 hour straight game in which you're entire party is under constant assualt from an army of Zombies that can only be killed by calling a head shot. And when I say army I mean tens of thousands. lol, after a session, never say the fight was easy or lack of challange just because you had 1 battle in a 6 hour session, only killed 1 enemy and the rest surrendered, more so if ur low leveld, the next session u might get 6 evil paladins on war hourses and 4 chaotic monks
Konal 02-22-06, 01:51 PM	217. Do NOT anger the minotaur who seems to be enjoying his breakfast. (Not me, another player) 218. When the Wizard has more strength than the fighter, there is nothing the fighter can do to stop the torment, maybe if you're nice and carry all his stuff he'll cast Bull's Strength on you. (I was the Wizard haha) 219. Everyone says that Kender are bad... which they are, but they're also forgetting Gnomes, Gully Dwarves, and those players who seem to love making fatally stupid plans. 220. When your DM has a neat trap that he really likes, send other people to open the door and go in the room first.
Hariman 02-22-06, 02:26 PM	"118) When in a room that's 20 feet on a side, DO NOT cast fireball at the center, even if there are more enemies than PCs." 221: Quest Spell + Area Effect = Dead Enemies (I can't find where the Quest Spell feat is hidden. I know I've seen it before.) 222: Never charge anything that stood still the last round it acted. 223: Never injure a character when the player is being an A**. 224: Monkey Grip if you aren't at least huge sized. Power Attack is better. 225: Holy Water can be more effective against heavily armored undead at lower levels. 226: Never cast Tasha's Hideous Laughter on a high will save enemy from a scroll. You just wasted 150gp on a joke. 227: When your DM gives a crossbow that does an extra 5d8 sonic damage on each hit and an artifact sword, when the party isn't epic, he is a twink/munchkin. He sullies the good name of Powergamer. 228: Ninja Drow are badass. Don't F*** with Ninja Drow. 229: If an NPC is billed as a reformed cleric of an evil god, he's probably still evil. Especially if he still clerics for the evil god. 230: If NPC cleric of evil god asks you to join his service, DON'T. Even if you think he'll try to kill you if you refuse. 231: When said cleric tells you HE is trying to kidnap a party member or friend of your character, turn him in to the Watch!!! 232: Warlock + CG + Velsharoon (or Nerull) = More Trouble Than It's Worth Azuth (or Weejas) does a lot better for the good character. 233: Always have a battlemat or combat grid. Don't just try to describe everything. It just pisses off you and your player when you don't map things out. 234: When DMing, if a spell works by the rules and you don't like it, suck it up and congratulate the player on his good strategy/spell choice. 235: When making an encounter, don't houserule that your adamantine skinned Batista (With 1000 HP) is immune to a Coup De Grace. Especially if he's underwater, unconsious and BEING STABBED IN THE FACE!!!! 236: Always check your templates when making a big bad. Make sure you remove constitution when you make an undead boss. (NOT my mistake, but I caught it when my DM made this mistake.) :D 237: Add as few comic/movie/webcomic/television references as possible. Preferably only one per 10 sessions. Or less. 237b: Make sure that the majority of the group will recognize the referential characters/events. 238: Linear Dungeon = Bad. Have branching paths and alternate options. 239: The party will never react the way you want them to. Never have only one solution for an encounter. 240: Spellcasters = Bad Low Level enemies. 240b: Barbarians/Fighter at low level can easily kill party members. Especially if they are one level higher than the party. 241: Prior PCs showing up as characters is OK if they live in that city, would have done that as a character during play. Prior PCs as town rulers is a bad thing. Unless they actually founded and/or conquered that town. 242: Guns + Magic requires many supplements and a lot of planning. Don't just plunk them in together unless you have at least one campaign setting that combines magic and guns already. 243: Tell your players that you have an anything goes world. They'll appreciate it when they know they could have made a gunslinger. 244: Never make up items unless you are following the rules for crafting. You'll just unbalance things if you aren't careful. 245: Check you ego at the door when you DM. You are a storyteller and your NPC enemies are supposed to be beaten. You are not in a fight with the players, your NPCs are there to provide a challenge. If your NPCs are not providing a challenge, change tactics and find new ways for them to fight. 246: DM's Right is NOT a good thing. Do Not Invoke Unless The Majority of The Group Agrees With You. 247: DM's Right is often a tool of a bad or inexperienced DM. 248: If a player looks up the correct application of a rule and applying the correct rule retroactively will kill a player, make an exception if the player doesn't want to make a new character. 249: If a player embarasses you by looking up the correct application of a rule, thank him, make a note of it and apply the rule correctly. Overriding the correct application of the rule will make you look like a jackass. 250: Have a sense of humor. It helps. In more than just D&D.
TheAcousticBandit 02-22-06, 03:41 PM	251: Always remember to tie rope to the grappleing hook before you throw it.