Post/Author/DateTime	Post
The Stray 01-25-04, 04:55 PM	This is a survival guide for both players and characters. You've all seen things likes these...the ones that lead to character deaths, curses, and Evil DM Snickering (tm). So, without further ado, I present: 101 Really BAD Ideas: 1. Ignoring the DM when he says "Are you sure you want to touch/poke/prod/pick up/walk to/run to/run from/etc that?" 2. Always backing off when the DM says ""Are you sure you want to touch/poke/prod/pick up/walk to/run to/run from/etc that?" (after all, DMs are evil...;)) 3. Arguing with an angry dragon. 4. Hitting on the evlen princess in front of her father during delicate negotiations. I know you all have more...share!
magicchupacabra 01-25-04, 04:57 PM	5. Mooing at a ship full of Krynn minotaurs... that death was ugly...
bahamut_0 01-25-04, 04:58 PM	6) Never say to an angry dwarf who just lost all his friends, "Do you need some help, you look a bit short"
Tonus 01-25-04, 06:35 PM	7) Turning yourself invisible, then shouting "Follow me!" (I have seen this happen *TWICE* now.)
Duke Viper 01-25-04, 07:42 PM	8) Setting free a great wyrm green dragon, that is to be used to test an empires greatest warriors, just because you and the dragon both hate the emperor. and you are an elf :) I did this once, wasnt pretty.
Defaltkilla 01-25-04, 11:23 PM	9. Stacking dice when you know the DM hates it, it's really bad when in a crumbling cave. 10. Spinning your dice while in a crumbling cave. 11. Hitting the table so hard it topples over all the minitures, really bad when there are a ton of minitures.
BlaineTog 01-25-04, 11:26 PM	12. Trying to use wish for anythign other than the listed effects.
DarianVereeth 01-26-04, 02:32 AM	Yelling "I AM DARIAN" in the middle of an unstable, Underdark Carvern..... Darian Vereeth
Aucturos 01-26-04, 03:18 AM	13) Gourging on all of the snacks and pop provided without bringing any of your own, EVER, while at the DM's house. 14) Hitting on said DM's sweetheart next to you in plain sight. 15) Challenging said DM to a duel IN GAME. 16) Whispering to the other characters what you can see by peaking over the DM screen, in the middle of an empty field, during a thunderstorm, wielding a 10' metal pike, on top of a mountain, with heavy rain...
howlingwolf 01-26-04, 05:33 AM	17 - Learning a dozen different languages. All the same select dozen words. Insults. Then offering to do the diplomacy between your party and the irate cannibal chieftan. And you're the bard. 18 - Asking your DM if you can carry around bottle of lamp oil with rags stuffed in them. ( You're guaranteed at least one mage/critter will get smart and light them with a spell or something ) 19 - Charge to your demise in a attempt to help your party escape. You most likely will kill all the opposition, and be left bleeding in the middle of all the bodies with no healing or help. ( This happened once. Was hiliarious. A fighter who went from just over triple digits of Hp down to single while the rest ran away. The response IC? 'Guys.. You can stop running now.. Guys? GUYS? I'M DYING HERE!' )
Northen_Spur 01-26-04, 08:38 AM	20. Instead of followers, you train war monkeys
Thorak 01-26-04, 11:04 AM	Originally posted by howlingwolf 19 - Charge to your demise in a attempt to help your party escape. You most likely will kill all the opposition, and be left bleeding in the middle of all the bodies with no healing or help. ( This happened once. Was hiliarious. A fighter who went from just over triple digits of Hp down to single while the rest ran away. The response IC? 'Guys.. You can stop running now.. Guys? GUYS? I'M DYING HERE!' ) I have, to date, had two characters like this. Unfortunately, both to the DM's and my own horror, no matter how hard we tried (without cheating, or me giving up) they just...didn't...die. "Oh, a Great Wyrm Red Dragon? CHARGE!" *save* *whackity stabbity thump* "Anyone for dragonburgers?" It's sad when the DM can't kill a character. It's disgusting when the player and the DM combined can't do so. MY dwarven battlerager had one tactic, charge at the nearest and/or biggest monster, and whack it with his axe until it stopped moving. Sadly, he never encountered anything it didn't work on...
Edymnion 01-26-04, 11:11 AM	21) Asking your DM to introduce Called Shots because its more "realistic", as you are then ambushed by a dozen Rogue/Sorcerers with Crossbows, True Strike, and a bad habit of aiming for your head.
CaoSlayer 01-26-04, 11:13 AM	21 pulling out a card from a deck of many things after drawing two good cards. 22 casting cause wounds in a pale man (result to be an vampire) 23 doing almost anything but fight in plate mail (run, climb, swim) 24 attack alone a level draining creature
niesl 01-26-04, 12:38 PM	25. Cast knock on locks to release more golems into the dungeon in the middle of a fight with two golems. (If the PC had succeeded it was a TPK for sure) 26. Saying 'Whatever, Orcs are stupid creatures' in Common while negotiating with a Orc with 14 int...
Silvertongue 01-26-04, 12:47 PM	27. Split up.
ColinUK 01-26-04, 01:51 PM	28 - Sending our magical tooled up fighter off to fight a creature in the next room, locking the door behind him, only to hear him scream SPELL GUANT! - giggle- ooo how we giggled... 29 - Contructing a level 5 Construct to hold the above door closed while we played cards and listen to the running comentry of the fight lol.... Well, the female elf warrior had a thing about running from ALL fights as she might get hurt. giggle giggle *evil giggle* Colin-uk
Stormweaver 01-26-04, 02:05 PM	Some players did this when their PC died... 31 - Saying "I surrender" every time you hit one of the goblin who are trying to skin you. The goblins got angry and stop believing him after his thrid kill... 20 goblins, one level 3 ranger, you do the math... the worst part is the rest fo the party camme charging in about 5 rounds too late. 32 - Jumping after a mage in a tower of unknown height without the benifit of any fly, levitate or feather fall effect. (this pc went splat on the ground, took 53 points of damage and rolled 1 on his constitution save) 33 - Going one one one with a starfighter Battledroid when you are a second level jedi guardian in star wars. (the PC died with the first hit) 34 - Entering a closed house with a dozen cadaver in it a a funy burning smell inside (burnt othor fumes) Those PC didn't died but wished they had 35 - Telling the high justice to "shove it". Now is a shieldbearer for an obnoxious paladin bound for service for 8 years. 36 - Publicly killing a few big shot guildsmen in a town where your friends have familly members. Its not because your are above the legal justice that you are above their justice...
P.Bear 01-27-04, 08:16 PM	37) Keep bumping the table and knocking over, or almost knocking over everyones drinks. 38) While talking to one person you are actually looking at another( I do this all the time ;p ). 39) Always late for a session. WERD!!!
Addi83 01-27-04, 10:47 PM	40. While at level 9, cast searing light at an old black dragon wyrm, having just negotiated for him to let you go in exchange for money.
The Stray 01-28-04, 12:03 AM	41. Trying to disguise yourselves as evil cultists when you have no ranks in the disguise skill. (oy, that got ugly really qucickly. I'm betting the players wish the cultists HAD killed them rather than what they were subjected to...)
olothfaern 01-28-04, 12:53 AM	let's see if this works (let me know) it's our death board, it's a bit out of date, and some of the deaths are just deaths, but others should account for at least 3 more stupid things... http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Tarien/database?method=reportRows&tbl=1
Draco_Whitewind 01-28-04, 03:55 AM	42: Trying to use a FR spell in a Low magic world "but it's only Hunter's Mercy!" ~Draco
ColinUK 01-28-04, 06:56 AM	43 :- Telling the Jade Falcons, just after they delclared their attentions to take the planet we are on, to 'Come and have a go if you think your hard enough!' The battle lasted over 2 days of real time lol.... 44:- 1 party member after passing a poison touch will save throw, handing the item to another member of the party, who took it in his uncovered hands lol!!! 45:- The GM letting the same group fight an evil temple with lots of guards and other nasty things for about 4 weeks before the party realised that the whole time they where illusions. Lots of spells, scrolls and potions wasted those days.
Verenal 01-28-04, 08:37 AM	46. Disbelieving.
Asta Kask 01-28-04, 09:17 AM	47) Saying "Just like dwarves" in elvish when you're an elf negotiating with an angry dwarf. 48) When asked "what was that" by the angry dwarf, you translate to common. 49) Ask the 17th level wizard about the one spell you know he's embarrassed that he's researched. (Vangerdahast, Ghost Pipes) 50) When in a town full of rednecks insanely protective about their women, you go out to "strut your stuff". Note: All of the above was done by ONE character. He was known as the "master of disaster". Later, we made it our introductory test to the team to be able to beat him in a fight. Never had to turn anyone down.
E-Vile 01-28-04, 09:22 AM	Originally posted by howlingwolf 17 - Learning a dozen different languages. All the same select dozen words. Insults. Then offering to do the diplomacy between your party and the irate cannibal chieftan. And you're the bard. A friend of mine can actually say in 42 languages (in real life) "your mother has a moustache" 51: Boast about your new character. 52: Keep on trying to steal from the party's muscle when you have no ranks in sleight of hand 53: Cling on the leg of an elven demigoddess when you are a dwarf who believes he is a drow. (actually happened)
The Stray 01-28-04, 10:08 PM	A collary to 12-- 53. Using a wish for ANY purpos while in Ravenloft...
Qube 01-29-04, 05:40 AM	(post above me must be 54?) 55) stop a charging minotaur when you are a lvl 3 bard (can you say splut?)
wdarkk 01-29-04, 06:14 AM	56. "Kiaransalee? That sounds like a pretty name. Must be Good." (Goddess of the Undead) 57. Being a Paladin and not using Detect Evil ever.
BlueOgre 01-29-04, 06:29 AM	58. Not waiting other party members to catch up...
Narg 01-29-04, 06:55 AM	59. The party (2nd) had a unplesant meeting with a 16th level EVIL clerlic, after being released and promising to not tell about the clerlics plans, one of the fighters sais "ok, he believes that we won't hurt him, so now when he falls to seep in his tent we stabs him!" The problem: he stood beside the clerlics tent in wich the clerlic had entered one minute earlier... 60. Same fighter (1st level this time) joins a hunting competition with his friend, the longer into the forest they get the more challenging the creatures get... "Hey look a brown bear, we can take it!!!" He survived (1 HP left) and the bear ran away (5 hp left) so he ran after only to encounter a dire wolverin, "hm... IU nearly took the bear so why not" fiering an arrow "wow! I got 1 HP, time to run!" Thanks to the rest of the party he barely escaped
Capn Charlie 01-29-04, 06:58 AM	61) Cast a detect alignment spell in a non combat situation. 62) Say bad things about your DM when there is a character sheet or dice in the room. 63) Forget that an immovable rod has a weight limit then hinge all your plans on using the rod in such a way.
drewrick 01-29-04, 02:07 PM	:teach: 64) Repeatedly ask the DM if every pile of bones you see in a dungeon is a "demi-lich" :b:
fab5101 01-29-04, 10:32 PM	65. Check for traps on doors...in pyramids...in Egypt...you might just get your arms blown off! :( (oh yeah and then reincarnated as a human when you used to be an elf) I hate Egypt...
d_nychus 01-30-04, 08:01 AM	66. Going down the well. In any campaign. Ever.
paintedmask2 01-30-04, 04:37 PM	67) Attempting to trip a titan (remember it's got to land somewhere!) 68) Sending your animal companion to attack the crap golem... Actually did this the other day. My wolverine was willing to attack with it's claws only, but my freind's snake just crawled down a hole. 69) Taking on that crap golem in melee... Did this too; not pleasant, and it took forever to get the stink out of my armor (had to spend a few hours as a porpouse). 70) Suggesting that the DM try making custome monsters, thus leading to a confrontation with a crap golem.
lotterybucks 01-30-04, 05:13 PM	71) Raising two CR 19 hound archons to guard your phylactery, not knowing that they don't keep their powers (make that Medium CR 1/3 skeletons) 72) Telling the DM that you have to leave early...All session he tried to kill me so that the others could go on a side adventure resurrecting my PC 73) Spilling Mountain Dew on the DM's books 74) Kicking the DM's cat
Fahrenheit 01-30-04, 05:36 PM	Playing 5-Card Draw Poker with a Deck of Many Things Casting Darkness on the battlefield, only to realize that your darkvision won't help you see through it.
bahamut_0 01-30-04, 05:46 PM	77) Get into a fist fight with a lich lord in disguise. This happened to a player the other day. Poor short tempered dwarf, we'll all miss him :fight!:
The BO 01-30-04, 07:06 PM	78) Grappeling the opponent of a mage, who is eager to cast burning hands 79) Having an 8th level Fighter turn on an 8th level Fey'ri (Elf/Tiefling ... DR 10/+1, flying) "just for fun" when you have no magical bow -- The fighter got away with 5hp :mad: -- 80) Trying to kill a partymember (same Fey'ri) by pushing him of a cliff, forgetting about his ring of featherfalling and wings 81) Strolling through a room, while the rouge is still checking the entrance for traps ("dude, come on. there weren't any traps in the last 5 rooms...") 82) Telling the dwarves that this land is yours by birthright, because some thousand years ago there were elves .... just before asking them to give you free passage through their mines. 83) Playing a character, who commited all of the above. (exept for that grapeling thing .... there the player had the mage) -- Amadis is not stupid! -- Then stop playing him that way!!
BrianMc223 01-30-04, 09:12 PM	84) Saying "My elven rangers always kick ass, I don't need any special templets or anything." When playing with an evil Dm that is runing a campaing with a lesser type of angel fighter (lesser than deva), a quasi-diety cleric, and a cyclops fighter, and thinking a few extra levels will really help. Note: I am said evil dm, and the first dungeon consists of about 12 ogres that love chargeing.......... The player is arrogant, and soon to lose one of his said extra levels....... 85) Playing in a party that dosen't have a rogue.
Faeryl Zauvirr 01-31-04, 06:12 AM	87) Tearing into the DM's mum's driveway with your new turbo-charged full injected 5.5 litre Lexus, with street rap blaring out of your 10x12 amps. Then saying, "Damn, I think I hit your cat coming down the street."
burning_blood 02-01-04, 03:04 AM	88) Leaping fully into a pool of acid in the belief that your 5 acid resistance will protect you. 89) A wizard running naked (and without components) into a pitch black cave from whence emanate the sounds of heavy breathing and growling... especially after one of your party members has tried and failed to grapple you to prevent you from doing just that. 90) Saying, "I do nothing, everything here is perfectly safe," when the DM tells you "Ok, now you're in the cave and the sounds of breathing and growling are all around you, so close you can feel breath on your skin..."
Tevish Szat 02-01-04, 03:23 AM	91) Putting a Baaz Draconian on sentry duty. 92) saying "Let's kill 'em all and let the gods sort it out." to the party paladin. In refrence to the population of a town where an NPC assassin was lurking. 93) The above to an NPC paladin whos home town you happen ot be talking about. 94) Climbing a mountain in full plate armor and, at the peak, in the middle of a thunderstorm, lifting your sword to the heavens and screaming something along the lines of "All the gods are frauds!"... You'll regret it, even if you are an Athar.
Addi83 02-01-04, 07:21 AM	Originally posted by lotterybucks 71) Raising two CR 19 hound archons to guard your phylactery, not knowing that they don't keep their powers (make that Medium CR 1/3 skeletons) I don't believe that outsiders can be raised, you need resurrection or true resurrection, and that way, they keep their power.
Dwalon 02-01-04, 01:05 PM	95) Accidently dropping the super greasy extra-pepperoni pizza onto the DM's livingroom shag carpet. 96) Accidently dropping the super greasy extra-pepperoni pizza onto the DM's cat who was standing on the living room shag carpet. 97) Having a female DM who has an abnormal love for cats and hates to get grease, pepperoni and bits of melted cheese out of shag carpet.
lotterybucks 02-01-04, 01:34 PM	98) Being a demi-lich hand with 18 soul gem/platinum rings and a white leather glove (It's the bling-bling lich!!!) 99) Fighting a skeleton made of dozens of individual demi-lichs
Qube 02-01-04, 03:20 PM	86. jumping with a portable hole into a bag of holding (sinking ship, couldn't swim, and way past my bed-time (just kidding, just very tired)) 100. asking the DM for a random encounter (we got a wyvern, as a party of 5 lvl 4 characters with 3 magic items (a large silver +1 mornigstar and 1 pair of boots of elfvenkind) (so that makes 3 magic items, get it?) ) 101. running/charging/... in a forest or unsolid ground save or check to see if you don't fall or hit a tree.
Qube 02-01-04, 03:25 PM	congreats to The Stray: not many traits get their quota :bounce: :pile: :bounce: :pile: :bounce: :pile: :invasion: :invasion: :invasion: :invasion:
Qube 02-01-04, 03:30 PM	a tribute to this trait (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?s=&postid=2468598#post2468598) the horrors continue ...