Post/Author/DateTime	Post
Master_Vega 02-22-08, 12:31 AM	So I heard about a few funny system exploits awhile back. I'd like to hear yours. :P Don't count errata, unless errata has led to more silliness. Go ahead and list misprints too. 1. The Commoner Railgun: Need to take out that castle? Just hire six-hundred commoners (a GP per commoner will make them jump for joy) to stand in line and pass a large rock (a move action) to the guy next to him and so on all the way to the castle. Assuming they all finish their move actions in three seconds, you have a rock moving at 1000ft/sec. G'bye wall! 2. Bag O' Rats+Supreme Cleave: Need to get from here to there really fast? Hold up your Bag O Rats(tm) and smack it really hard with the flat of your sword! You'll move 5ft each time you kill a rat!
Douglasm 02-22-08, 03:04 PM	1. Sadly, the same rules that allow moving the rock along the line so fast also make that speed completely irrelevant for throwing it - the last commoner in line throws it just as hard, fast, and far as if he were completely alone. 3. Ride bonus +19 or higher. Line up a bunch of mounts. Mount one as a free action (automatic success). Dismount as a free action... on the other side. Mount the next as a free action. Dismount on the other side. Repeat as many times as you like, it's all free actions. 4. Look up the spell Veil of Undeath in the Spell Compendium and look carefully at the list of things it makes you immune to. In particular, "death". No, not "death effects", "death". By RAW you cannot die while under the effect of this spell.
Dan Hemmens 02-22-08, 03:13 PM	4. Look up the spell Veil of Undeath in the Spell Compendium and look carefully at the list of things it makes you immune to. In particular, "death". No, not "death effects", "death". By RAW you cannot die while under the effect of this spell. And since we're on the subject: 5. The good old "death doesn't actually have any game mechanical effects" thing. Which ironically means that being immune to death in general isn't that much of an issue.
Azezel 02-23-08, 09:51 AM	A pick does 1d4 damage, a heavy pick 1d6. Stone has Hardness 8.
M-bark 02-23-08, 09:59 AM	1. The Commoner Railgun: Need to take out that castle? Just hire six-hundred commoners (a GP per commoner will make them jump for joy) to stand in line and pass a large rock (a move action) to the guy next to him and so on all the way to the castle. Assuming they all finish their move actions in three seconds, you have a rock moving at 1000ft/sec. G'bye wall! If my players would come up with something like that, I'd indeed laugh, but I'd let it roll for the first time due to the rule of cool and the rule of funny. :cool:
Dan Hemmens 02-23-08, 10:20 AM	A pick does 1d4 damage, a heavy pick 1d6. Stone has Hardness 8. "Dammit, we'll never cut through this stone with these. Break out the greatswords"
jage 02-23-08, 10:40 AM	A pick does 1d4 damage, a heavy pick 1d6. Stone has Hardness 8. You know I see this all the time, but seriously some weenie with a pick isn't going to be able to break up stone. Strength Bonus When you hit with a melee or thrown weapon, including a sling, add your Strength modifier to the damage result. [...] Wielding a Weapon Two-Handed When you deal damage with a weapon that you are wielding two-handed, you add 1½ times your Strength bonus. However, you don’t get this higher Strength bonus when using a light weapon with two hands. So you need a 14 str to break stone with a heavy pick, and it will be hard work, and an 18 to do it with a light pick, assuming you are a medium character. And I'd never heard the railgun actually described, but based on the "railgun" name wouldn't it be the rate of delivery of rocks and not the actual speed of one rock that mattered? (especially under the rules?) Anyway, I feel like a total rules lawyer so I'm going to go commit suicide with my composite longbow, acrobatic boots, Improved Increased Speed, Advanced Increased Speed, and a mix of slow and haste spells.
Xavon 02-23-08, 02:34 PM	I've always thought the Commoner railgun would make a great cross country mail system. Fill bags of holding with mail, and pass then from city to city in 6 seconds...
Vaelan 02-23-08, 04:27 PM	A pick does 1d4 damage, a heavy pick 1d6. Stone has Hardness 8. Vulnerability to Certain Attacks Certain attacks are especially successful against some objects. In such cases, attacks deal double their normal damage and may ignore the object’s hardness. The examples given are fairly mundane. Axe vs. tree, fire vs. paper. Pick vs. rock isn't a huge stretch.
Rood_Inverse 02-23-08, 05:09 PM	You know I see this all the time, but seriously some weenie with a pick isn't going to be able to break up stone. In DR 1966, Andy Dufresne escaped from Baldur's Gate prison. All they found of him was a muddy set of prison clothes, a bar of soap, and an old rock hammer, damn near worn down to the nub. I used to think it would take six-hundred years to tunnel under the wall with it. Old Andy did it in less than twenty. Oh, Andy loved Knowledge: (Geology), I guess it appealed to his meticulous nature. An ice age here, million years of mountain building there. Geology is the study of pressure and time. That's all it takes really, pressure, and time. That, and a big god-damned tapestry. Like I said, in prison a man will do anything to keep his mind occupied. It turns out Andy's favourite hobby was totin' his wall through the exercise yard, a handful at a time. I guess after Tommy was killed, he decided he had been here just about long enough. Andy did like he was told, buffed those riding boots to a high mirror shine. The guard simply didn't notice, neither did I... I mean, seriously, how often do you really look at a mans riding boots? Andy crawled to freedom through five-hundred yards of ****-smelling foulness I can't even imagine, or maybe I just don't want too. Five-Hundred yards... that's the length of five football fields, just shy of half a mile.
jage 02-23-08, 05:39 PM	Badly poured aggregate != Solid stone And if you want to bring fiction to bear on the relative physics of fantasy why not bring John Henry into the mix. He must have taken TWF. ObChaingunMail: Make the commoners hill giants and call it "The Halfling Express".
Dan Hemmens 02-23-08, 06:19 PM	You know I see this all the time, but seriously some weenie with a pick isn't going to be able to break up stone. But the *same* weenie with a Greatsword *will* be able to break up stone. Of course as people have pointed out, you can just rule that picks ignore the Hardness of stone, but really that's avoiding the issue. The point is that the "Breaking Objects" rules do more harm than good. They tell you that you *can* break stuff you obviously *shouldn't* be able to break (stone with swords, trees with clubs) and that you *can't* break stuff you obviously *should* be able to break (stone with picks, trees with axes as opposed to spears). There's the catch all "the DM can rule that it doesn't work that way" thing, but really when you're using the exception for all practical purposes, what are the rules even *there* for.
stargate525 02-23-08, 06:56 PM	1. Sadly, the same rules that allow moving the rock along the line so fast also make that speed completely irrelevant for throwing it - the last commoner in line throws it just as hard, fast, and far as if he were completely alone. And that's why the last guy takes it and then drops it (A free action). It therefore maintains its relative speed and direction. Commoner railgun FTW! And I feel I must put in my version of the ultimate bomb / power generator: Take a pair of ring gates, arrange them so that one lets out into the other (creating a continual loop). Place a rod of Iron in the gate that is as long as the gap between the two gates, minus a couple of millimeters. The two ends of the rod should almost touch, but not quite. Weld them together. You now have an infinitely long length of iron rod. Place this whole contraption into a jar that can hold a vacuum. Evacuate all the air, and release the rod. The rod will accelerate using gravity infinitely. It'll hit the speed of light in a little over five hours, assuming earth-norm gravity. Since mass increases with speed, eventually this should, I think, create a black hole. Once that happens, the rings will collapse and release this massive... thing from its prison, sending the newly created black hole zooming into the middle of the planet at several times the speed of light. If you want to generate enormous amounts of energy, make the pipe copper, wrap wire around the passage for it, and leave a little air in it to prevent the black hole of death.
pigknight 02-23-08, 10:57 PM	If you can beat a vampire or a lich in a fight then you can start grinding it until you are 8 levels higher than it.
Drackthor 02-23-08, 11:52 PM	If you can beat a vampire or a lich in a fight then you can start grinding it until you are 8 levels higher than it. Unless the DM rules that defeating a Vampire or Lich actually entails vanquishing it, not just temporarily inconveniencing it.
Neo_Leviathan 02-24-08, 06:52 AM	9(?): Buy a ladder. Remove the rungs. Sell the two 10ft poles for more than the original ladder 10: Buy a spellbook (blank). Rip out all the pages. Sell pages individually for more than the spellbook. 11: Be a frenzied berzerker, or under the Delay Death spell. Get walloped down to -1000. Stick head in bucket of water, volunarily fail Con check vs drowning. Get healed to -1hp 12: After you have reached 61hp, raise yourself up to several thousand feet (any fly spell/ability will do), carrying the heaviest weight you can. Enter freefall. Hit terminal velocity, then the ground, causing yourself a nice large crater. Dust yourself off after taking only 10d6 falilng damage (60hp max) 13: And remember boys and girls. In a stand-up fight, a housecat can kill a lvl1 commoner
Sunic_Flames 02-24-08, 09:36 AM	Falling damage caps at 20d6. :P
Half_Dragon_Infernal 02-24-08, 12:10 PM	So make it 121 hp.
Malcaor 02-24-08, 03:48 PM	I would LMAO if someone thought it was 10D6 and tried that trick in my campaign.
Half_Dragon_Infernal 02-24-08, 03:50 PM	That would be funny. The person would take 20d6. Average damage would kill them.
Demithor 02-24-08, 05:01 PM	3. Ride bonus +19 or higher. Line up a bunch of mounts. Mount one as a free action (automatic success). Dismount as a free action... on the other side. Mount the next as a free action. Dismount on the other side. Repeat as many times as you like, it's all free actions. "[...]You can perform one or more free actions while taking another action normally. However, the DM puts reasonable limits on what you can really do for free."
Sunic_Flames 02-24-08, 05:03 PM	I would LMAO if someone thought it was 10D6 and tried that trick in my campaign. Be even funnier if they still rolled a 60 or less. Bonus points if they rolled a 20. :P To the above: See end of title. :P
Demithor 02-24-08, 05:06 PM	To the above: It's the end of the lovely weekend, and I'm tired. *shifty eyes*
moonblossom 02-24-08, 05:27 PM	3. Ride bonus +19 or higher. Line up a bunch of mounts. Mount one as a free action (automatic success). Dismount as a free action... on the other side. Mount the next as a free action. Dismount on the other side. Repeat as many times as you like, it's all free actions. That would totally crack me up if someone tried that in my campaign! What would you even accomplish by doing that?
Cowczar 02-24-08, 06:04 PM	That would totally crack me up if someone tried that in my campaign! What would you even accomplish by doing that? Ummm... to travel?
RPJesus 02-24-08, 06:11 PM	I dunno if this necesarily counts, but the 10 year old in me thinks it's ****ing hilarious that when you combine the fact that they deal 1d6 lethal damage with unarmed attacks, and can make unarmed attacks with anything, a monk could technically dry hump somebody to death.
CryoSilver 02-24-08, 06:16 PM	You can travel as far as there are horses lined up in one round.
Vaelan 02-24-08, 07:07 PM	3. Ride bonus +19 or higher. Line up a bunch of mounts. Mount one as a free action (automatic success). Dismount as a free action... on the other side. Mount the next as a free action. Dismount on the other side. Repeat as many times as you like, it's all free actions. Many leading magical theorists claim that this is how teleport spells really work. Nobody believes in Ethereal Horses, though.
CryoSilver 02-24-08, 10:44 PM	Astral horses. Teleport goes through the Astral Plane.
calronmoonflower 02-25-08, 01:56 AM	Since mass increases with speed, Huh, no it doesn't. Momentum increases with speed. If you dispel one of the gates it should make a good railgun through. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mass
Jutter 02-25-08, 06:58 AM	14. Craft (weaponsmith) an entire forest into quarterstaffs in literally no-time. Since the amount of time needed to craft a weapon depends on it's cost, and a quarterstaff is free.....
stargate525 02-25-08, 10:54 AM	Huh, no it doesn't. Momentum increases with speed. If you dispel one of the gates it should make a good railgun through. And that is one of the last times I foray into Einsteinian physics... :embarrass Would it accelerate to speeds past light?
Master_Vega 02-25-08, 11:23 AM	Good stuff, guys. Keep it coming. :P
SearcherOmega 02-25-08, 12:14 PM	15) Using the rules as written, you can make spot checks at no penalty while sleeping or knocked out. Seriously.
Baddum12 02-25-08, 03:10 PM	And that is one of the last times I foray into Einsteinian physics... :embarrass Would it accelerate to speeds past light? Kinematics and workings with mass and velocity are Newtonian physics I think. P.S. Just messing with ya:P But to reach the speed of light it would have to travel like 300 thousand km in a second or something like that. So if you line up enough commoners... ... ... ... ... I'm so doing this. Thank you! As far as exploiting game mechanincs... I've donned chained shirts in 10 rounds of battle while constantly running away. As far as I know there was nothing in the book that said I couldn't... and obviously in real life this wouldn't work too well.
Mock26 02-25-08, 03:23 PM	Next time you go into combat tell your DM that you're holding your sword by the blade or that you're firing your arrows backwards. There is nothing in the rules that states which part of the weapon causes damage.
vadasz 02-25-08, 04:53 PM	And that is one of the last times I foray into Einsteinian physics... :embarrass Would it accelerate to speeds past light? Actually, one of the consequences of special relativity is that (all from an observers point of view) as an object approaches the speed of light it's mass increases exponentially, thus requiring more energy to continue acceleration. It was, I believe, the reason Einstein said travel at or beyond the speed of light was impossible for an object of any mass, as at the speed of light the object would become infinitely massive. The two questions, though, are; 1: If the iron rod reaches that point, does an infinitely massive object collapse in on itself? if yes, then there's your black hole and bye-bye planet. If no, then you still have a massive gravity well which will likely destroy the planet and cause relative havoc with the local solar system in general. 2: Given the need for more and more energy to continue acceleration of the iron rod, could it even reach that point? The logical result is the iron rod will reach a point of equilibrium where it's mass balances it's speed and it just doesn't go any faster. At that point the results depend on what that point is. It may have enough mass to cause a mess of the local gravity, in which case you'll have a simulated black hole whose scale depends on the size of the gravity well, anything from destroy some poor commoners’ outhouse to the entire kingdom, continent, even the planet. I really don't want to do that math though.
Vaelan 02-25-08, 05:01 PM	Astral horses. Teleport goes through the Astral Plane. Yes, of course. My apologies. The existence of Ethereal Horses is, of course, a given (Nightmares).
Ekko 02-25-08, 05:09 PM	Cast wall of force (or any similar immobile, heavy object making spell). Watch as it zooms to the west at several miles/second, and destroys most of what's in it's path. Or, set the commoner railgun on a hill, and send a medieval satelite. I dub it...kintups!
themocaw 02-25-08, 05:14 PM	Cast wall of force (or any similar immobile, heavy object making spell). Watch as it zooms to the west at several miles/second, and destroys most of what's in it's path. Or, set the commoner railgun on a hill, and send a medieval satelite. I dub it...kintups! Actually, the whole "wall of force smashes everything" thing was refuted by Dave Noonan in one of the podcasts. Just saying.
Euclid 02-25-08, 08:27 PM	Would it accelerate to speeds past light? That would take more energy than could ever exist, even with magic.
Mock26 02-25-08, 08:50 PM	That would take more energy than could ever exist, even with magic. Never underestimate the power of the average commoner, especially when they work together in vast numbers!
pmurray@bigpond.com 02-25-08, 08:51 PM	3. Ride bonus +19 or higher. Line up a bunch of mounts. Mount one as a free action (automatic success). Dismount as a free action... on the other side. Mount the next as a free action. Dismount on the other side. Repeat as many times as you like, it's all free actions. And then slam yourself into the castle wall!
pmurray@bigpond.com 02-25-08, 08:53 PM	Never underestimate the power of the average commoner, especially when they work together in vast numbers! Eg: the pyramids. Not built by israelite slaves, but by commonners during the off season. Quite possibly a very clever plan to keep 'em busy during a time of year when they woud otherwise be idle.
pmurray@bigpond.com 02-25-08, 09:07 PM	Actually, one of the consequences of special relativity is that (all from an observers point of view) as an object approaches the speed of light it's mass increases exponentially, It's not actually exponential. it's 1/(c^2 - v^2). thus requiring more energy to continue acceleration. It was, I believe, the reason Einstein said travel at or beyond the speed of light was impossible for an object of any mass, as at the speed of light the object would become infinitely massive. It's quite a bit weirder than that. Imagine that, rather than smoothly increasing speed, you did it in a series of bursts - accelerate for a second, rest for a second, and so on. Now, from the POV of the object, during those moments when it is not accelerating, it is stationary, no matter how fast it might be moving relative to some other observer. So the speed of light looks as distant as it ever does, no matter how long and hard you accelerate. It looks different to an outside observer because of the way that the geometry of time transforms when you compare the way that two different observers in relative motion see things. 1: If the iron rod reaches that point, does an infinitely massive object collapse in on itself? if yes, then there's your black hole and bye-bye planet. If no, then you still have a massive gravity well which will likely destroy the planet and cause relative havoc with the local solar system in general. Not sure. I belive that a massively energetic object will indeed warp space the same as a massively massive one. But, by definition, you need to impart enough KE into the rod that the mass-equivalent is the same as the mass of a black hole of equal size. If you have that much energy to fling around, you don't *need* to go to the trouble of accelerating iron rods about to accomplish your vengeance. 2: Given the need for more and more energy to continue acceleration of the iron rod, could it even reach that point? The logical result is the iron rod will reach a point of equilibrium where it's mass balances it's speed and it just doesn't go any faster. Not if you are travelling in a vacuum. You can *always* accellerate just a tiny tiny bit closer to light speed, no matter how close you get. If you are *not* in a vacuum, then the air friction will melt the rod way before it reaches lightspeed. At that point the results depend on what that point is. It may have enough mass to cause a mess of the local gravity, in which case you'll have a simulated black hole whose scale depends on the size of the gravity well, anything from destroy some poor commoners’ outhouse to the entire kingdom, continent, even the planet. I really don't want to do that math though. Like I said - if you have enough energy to do that, just pump it into a normal fireball, or create a city-sized portal to the abyss.
stargate525 02-25-08, 11:17 PM	2: Given the need for more and more energy to continue acceleration of the iron rod, could it even reach that point? The logical result is the iron rod will reach a point of equilibrium where it's mass balances it's speed and it just doesn't go any faster. At that point the results depend on what that point is. It may have enough mass to cause a mess of the local gravity, in which case you'll have a simulated black hole whose scale depends on the size of the gravity well, anything from destroy some poor commoners’ outhouse to the entire kingdom, continent, even the planet. I really don't want to do that math though. Actually, all I need is enough of a gravity well to break the glass housing. At which point the atmosphere comes rushing in, then promptly combusts, creating a huge fireball at least, not to mention the very quickly moving, red hot iron rod that just got hurtled into the ground. So, wouldn't this device eventually start slowing down the planet?
Fidel_Blastro 02-26-08, 06:34 PM	Vastly intelligent PCs/DMs discuss theoretical concepts of space and matter in the subject of fictional-medieval D&D: D20 future:now!
vadasz 02-27-08, 04:04 PM	It's not actually exponential. it's 1/(c^2 - v^2). Considering I was typing all that from memory of Physics 101 from a very long time ago, I'm glad all I messed up was the formula lol. However, I do agree that anyone capable of taking the concept to it's conclusion would have ample ability to turn the world into his/her own personal hacky sack. I was just letting my brain flow into a thought experiment on it. Back to the spirit of the topic though, my personal favorite brain twister is the half dragon template. Only requirements for it are "a living, corporeal creature" means you can have any number of wacky things like a half dragon dragon, or a half gold, half silver, half brass, half bronze, half copper, half every other true dragon type human, got to be at least enough full people in that poor sods head to give MPS sufferers everywhere a new king.
Saiyamantis 02-27-08, 07:05 PM	I dunno if this necesarily counts, but the 10 year old in me thinks it's ****ing hilarious that when you combine the fact that they deal 1d6 lethal damage with unarmed attacks, and can make unarmed attacks with anything, a monk could technically dry hump somebody to death. On the subject of monks and unarmed strikes... 1) Monks aren't proficient with their own fists. 2) They do, however, treat their unarmed strikes as manufactured weapons, meaning they can be magically enhanced. Who wants 1 +1 throwing returning fist? 3) A character of 11th level or higher with Superior Unarmed Strike (ToB) will deal less damage if he takes one level of monk.
RPJesus 02-27-08, 07:09 PM	Who wants 1 +1 throwing returning fist? I can't think of an appropriate mech reference so "Falcon, PUNCH!" :D
CryoSilver 02-27-08, 07:28 PM	Actually, the whole "wall of force smashes everything" thing was refuted by Dave Noonan in one of the podcasts. Just saying. Wall of Force is still an excellent way of taking down ships. 1000 foot aircraft carrier? A single Wall of Force (which is invisible, hilariously) will stop it dead.
Kursk 02-27-08, 07:33 PM	Would it accelerate to speeds past light? Eventually.
I_roll_ones 02-27-08, 07:48 PM	2) They do, however, treat their unarmed strikes as manufactured weapons, meaning they can be magically enhanced. Who wants 1 +1 throwing returning fist? There now needs to be a prestige class for Warforged monks/unarmed sword sages where you throw your fists and they come back.
themocaw 02-27-08, 08:09 PM	There now needs to be a prestige class for Warforged monks/unarmed sword sages where you throw your fists and they come back. Mazinger Z called from Japan. He wants his ideas back. Here's an interesting one for you: assume a Fighter with quick draw and enchanted scabbards that create shortswords (joke item we made up for a friend of ours with TWF who kept rolling 1s and dropping his weapons), or a Heward's Handy Haversack filled with them. Theoretically, he could draw a nearly infinite number of weapons from his backpack and drop them as free actions, then hide behind the resultant pile.
Kuroimaken 02-27-08, 08:37 PM	Cleric of the Sun with access to teleport. Makes sense that he'd get his spells back at sunrise, right? Have him teleport at 5:30 PM to the exact other side of the world and wait half an hour. BANG! Instant reload of spells.
jage 02-27-08, 11:13 PM	Cleric of the Sun with access to teleport. Makes sense that he'd get his spells back at sunrise, right? Have him teleport at 5:30 PM to the exact other side of the world and wait half an hour. BANG! Instant reload of spells. Nice. You could really do it anytime. Worst case scenerio is you're treading water or freezing in the mountains for a few minutes waiting to teleport back. It would be really bad if you miscalculated and missed sunrise by a few minutes and your teleport¹ didn't reload!
Jutter 02-28-08, 04:03 AM	Back to the spirit of the topic though, my personal favorite brain twister is the half dragon template. Only requirements for it are "a living, corporeal creature" means you can have any number of wacky things like a half dragon dragon. Apply the half dragon (red) template to a white dragon to generate a pink dragon. Give it a wizard dragonrider, and refer to them as 'Pinky and the brain'. Make them recurring villans. For sake of my sanity and those of others, I will not emphasize their goal in life. EDIT: What's a PLAYER to do. PLAYER. Not DM. Bad Jutter. Baaaaad Jutter.
Entropy_Judge 02-28-08, 04:09 AM	assume a Fighter with quick draw and enchanted scabbards that create shortswords TypeMoon's Fate/Stay Night already has this guy ... although it's *him* creating the blades, not the scabbards ....
Dog_O_War 02-28-08, 11:52 AM	There now needs to be a prestige class for Warforged monks/unarmed sword sages where you throw your fists and they come back. And it's called Hardman. (guess the reference) Originally posted by Jutter 14. Craft (weaponsmith) an entire forest into quarterstaffs in literally no-time. Since the amount of time needed to craft a weapon depends on it's cost, and a quarterstaff is free..... The craft check itself is performed once per week though. It'll still take you one week.
Kapalen 02-28-08, 12:06 PM	On the subject of monks and unarmed strikes... 1) Monks aren't proficient with their own fists. 2) They do, however, treat their unarmed strikes as manufactured weapons, meaning they can be magically enhanced. Who wants 1 +1 throwing returning fist? 3) A character of 11th level or higher with Superior Unarmed Strike (ToB) will deal less damage if he takes one level of monk. 1) Everyone is proficient in their fists, monks included. However, most people, those without Imp Unarmed Strike, provok eAoOs when fighting with them, but they may still be perfectly capable of writing, tying a rope, playing rock paper scissors, etc. 3) Don't you apply bonuses in the order most beneficial, therefore taking the 11 levels of nonmonk damage?
Demithor 02-28-08, 12:40 PM	The craft check itself is performed once per week though. It'll still take you one week. Or one day, if you use progress per day instead of week.
CowMasterTrojan 02-28-08, 01:30 PM	In DR 1966, Andy Dufresne escaped from Baldur's Gate prison. All they found of him was a muddy set of prison clothes, a bar of soap, and an old rock hammer, damn near worn down to the nub. I used to think it would take six-hundred years to tunnel under the wall with it. Old Andy did it in less than twenty. Oh, Andy loved Knowledge: (Geology), I guess it appealed to his meticulous nature. An ice age here, million years of mountain building there. Geology is the study of pressure and time. That's all it takes really, pressure, and time. That, and a big god-damned tapestry. Like I said, in prison a man will do anything to keep his mind occupied. It turns out Andy's favourite hobby was totin' his wall through the exercise yard, a handful at a time. I guess after Tommy was killed, he decided he had been here just about long enough. Andy did like he was told, buffed those riding boots to a high mirror shine. The guard simply didn't notice, neither did I... I mean, seriously, how often do you really look at a mans riding boots? Andy crawled to freedom through five-hundred yards of ****-smelling foulness I can't even imagine, or maybe I just don't want too. Five-Hundred yards... that's the length of five football fields, just shy of half a mile. The fact that you can quote that so perfectly... deserves some applause :clap: ... but the fact that no one recognized it makes me sad :weep:
RPJesus 02-28-08, 01:45 PM	I recognized it, I just didn't feel the need to comment.
Clem-Da-Squig 02-28-08, 01:53 PM	I recognized it, I just didn't feel the need to comment. Ditto.
Dog_O_War 02-28-08, 02:25 PM	The fact that you can quote that so perfectly... deserves some applause :clap: ... but the fact that no one recognized it makes me sad :weep: There is a title that comes from "guessing" famous movie lines and such; "Captain Obvious" Or as my brother will simply say, "thanks, tips:rolleyes:" This is most often why no one will state what is said, unless a reward is offered. You are right though, very accurate in the quote.
jage 02-28-08, 03:22 PM	Badly poured aggregate != Solid stone And if you want to bring fiction to bear on the relative physics of fantasy why not bring John Henry into the mix. He must have taken TWF. I think I deserve credit for recognizing it. Just because I didn't blurt out what it was... And there are like 168,000 Google matches for this line alone: "Like I said, in prison a man will do anything to keep his mind occupied." How is that special that he probably just copy/pasted it? :confused:
CheesieM0nkies 02-28-08, 09:13 PM	I guess theres always the "Buy a candle of incantation. Summon a Djinni. Use your three wishes to wish for more candles"
CapnCJ 03-03-08, 09:00 AM	Apply the half dragon (red) template to a white dragon to generate a pink dragon. Give it a wizard dragonrider, and refer to them as 'Pinky and the brain'. Make them recurring villans. For sake of my sanity and those of others, I will not emphasize their goal in life. Best post ever.
scarletice 03-03-08, 12:22 PM	Pun-Pun? :D
Sunic_Flames 03-04-08, 10:44 AM	Pun-Pun? :D Dum dum pish. Epic ownage in 69. ...That sounds dirty. :P
Omnirahk, half-Rahkshi 03-04-08, 05:21 PM	Huh, no it doesn't. Momentum increases with speed. If you dispel one of the gates it should make a good railgun through. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mass It usually doesn't. But when you near the speed of light, everything goes wacky. Like time itself slows down, because we have momentum in 4 dimensions, and they always combine to the same amount. Usually it's not noticeable, but as you near the speed of light, your momentum through time needs to decrease in order for your 3D momentum to increase. The problem with speed of light being unreachable is because mass gets in the way; I know the main problem is needing more fuel (and hence more mass) to go faster. The mass increases with the need for more fuel, so you can't get past a point. That's probably what stargate525 was thinking about, but it may be that mass actually does increase near the speed of light. *ugh* Quantum physics. I'm going to have to double check on this. Also, it's not possible for normal matter to go faster than the speed of light. I don't know the math, but it's a mathematical limit, not just a conceptual one. Mind you, there's a theoretical particle called a tachyon that goes faster than the speed of light, but that's because their mass contains the imaginary number i (square root of -1). It is incapable of going slower than light, it goes backwards in time,* and taking away energy makes it faster rather than slower. *This may be an optical illusion due to it moving faster than the light that allows us to see it, but it may be because of that whole 4th (time) dimension momentum thing. In order for the combination of all 4D momenta to be the same at faster than light speeds (3D momenta), you need to decrease its 4D momentum past the zero point (light) into the negatives. Hence, negative (reverse) momentum in time. Oi. Quantum mechanics. As for a vacuum to get past the whole terminal velocity thing, that's what Freedom of Movement is for. One of my characters once used that to go sky-diving down some central shaft of Dispater's tower. Which at least in our game (or is it canon? I don't know) had some subjective size trait, allowing it to be incredibly tall. Point is, the sonic boom I created just about peeled his tower like a banana. I'll just quote my character when we go caught: "They chose us for subtlety!" I forget if the sonic boom was extending just outside of my barrier, or if it only started when I canceled freedom of movement - and set myself and the cleric (whom I had jumped after to try to save) on fire. We then crashed to the floor and thanks to catfall (githzerai racial ability) I survived with "only a flesh wound" (we were using a flesh wounds/critical wounds HP system). Cleric meanwhile had two critcal wounds and three flesh wounds (just one short of dead), because I couldn't actually share my catfall ability. So all I did was set her on fire. And **** off Dispater.
Solaria 03-04-08, 07:11 PM	The examples given are fairly mundane. Axe vs. tree, fire vs. paper. Pick vs. rock isn't a huge stretch. Picks are crit X4.
anshar 03-04-08, 08:20 PM	And it's called Hardman. (guess the reference) That would be Megaman (3 IIRC).
Sunic_Flames 03-05-08, 08:33 AM	Picks are crit X4. And how do you crit an inanimate object? To quote... someone... "It's a rock! It doesn't have any vulnerable spots!"
Tectorman 03-05-08, 11:14 AM	And how do you crit an inanimate object? To quote... someone... "It's a rock! It doesn't have any vulnerable spots!" Tim Allen aka Jason Nesmith aka Commander Peter Quincy Taggert in GalaxyQuest.
Josheva 03-05-08, 03:36 PM	"It's a rock! It doesn't have any vulnerable spots!" I disagree. If you hit a disk shaped rock on the edge it will do nothing. If you hit it in the middle it will likely shatter. Also consider the process of cutting diamonds; make one cut in the wrong place and you're screwed because you've hit a vulerable spot.
Sunic_Flames 03-05-08, 03:40 PM	Way to fail at humor. :rolleyes:
Tectorman 03-05-08, 03:58 PM	@Josheva: I think you rolled a natural 1 on your Perform (comedy) check.
TwiddleStootch 03-06-08, 01:02 PM	The Flying Dwarven Hammer-Machine-Gun This one is pretty easy, I thought of it while discussing the contents of this thread with my brother. First, you need a dwarf, the higher the strength the better. Then you need to buy him a flying carpet (any magical item which allows fro flight will work) and as many Warhammers as you can get (crafting them your self is a good idea). Finally, give the dwarf the quickdraw feat. Have him fly above an enemy, the higher the better. Then, use a free action to draw a warhammer and a free action to drop it. Instant falling projectiles. Since all that is required is free actions, the only limit is from the DM. You could use any weapon, but warhammers are fun :D
Josheva 03-06-08, 08:22 PM	I was not actually trying to be funny, nor did I think anyone else was trying to be. Did I miss something? :( EDIT: Just re-read my post and I *might* know what you're talking about. When I was talking about cutting diamonds I was referencing how delicate of a job it is because one wrong cut can completely shatter and ruin the stone.
anshar 03-06-08, 10:49 PM	I was not actually trying to be funny, nor did I think anyone else was trying to be. Did I miss something? :( Yes, I'm afraid you did miss something. The quote in question: To quote... someone... "It's a rock! It doesn't have any vulnerable spots!" comes from a great comedy spoof of Star Trek called Galaxy Quest. It was a great and comical way to point out that in D&D only something with a discernable and working anatomy is subject to critcal hits.
Vulcanus 03-06-08, 11:35 PM	The Flying Dwarven Hammer-Machine-Gun This one is pretty easy, I thought of it while discussing the contents of this thread with my brother. First, you need a dwarf, the higher the strength the better. Then you need to buy him a flying carpet (any magical item which allows fro flight will work) and as many Warhammers as you can get (crafting them your self is a good idea). Finally, give the dwarf the quickdraw feat. Have him fly above an enemy, the higher the better. Then, use a free action to draw a warhammer and a free action to drop it. Instant falling projectiles. Since all that is required is free actions, the only limit is from the DM. You could use any weapon, but warhammers are fun :D Hammer Bros. from Mario?
calronmoonflower 03-07-08, 02:56 AM	At 20th level a spirit shaman is treated as a fey for magical effects. The spirit shamans chastise spirits ability affect all spirits within range and fey are considered spirits. Therefor at 20th level and higher a spirit shaman is effected by their own chastise spirits. :eek:
Bedeverekm 03-07-08, 06:43 AM	Clubs are free, according to the PHB price lists. Fire wood isn't. Starting character with 1,000,000 clubs sells them for firewood (Even allowing for inevitable market demand limits, and depreciation, though how can something priced at 1cp get any cheaper?) to get 1,000 pp, minus whatever the GM sets for the above reductions. If I'm DM, then... all of it, cheeky muppet. :P
Sunic_Flames 03-07-08, 08:07 AM	comes from a great comedy spoof of Star Trek called Galaxy Quest. It was a great and comical way to point out that in D&D only something with a discernable and working anatomy is subject to critcal hits. So... do I get a cookie? ^.^
TwiddleStootch 03-07-08, 03:05 PM	Hammer Bros. from Mario? Not in particular. I was just thinking about this thread the thought of dropping stuff being a free action came to mind. Then came dropping stuff on some one, then using a dwarf since they can carry a lot without being slowed (just to be safe) and then figuring they should be flying and then deciding on hammers. Any weapon works, but the smaller it is the more you can convince your DM to let you carry at once.
Bedeverekm 03-07-08, 04:47 PM	If you're going to do that, might as well load up with a bag of holding, full of hammers, and use the command word to empty, while over them.
Callista 03-07-08, 11:10 PM	Eventually. Nope, nothing can ever reach the speed of light--not even with magic providing acceleration forever. At time=infinity, it reaches the speed of light, has infinite mass, and compresses time to reach the end of the universe. Read pmurray's nice explanation on the previous page. Relativity is some seriously wacky stuff... and seriously fascinating... Read "A Brief History of Time", sometime, if you've got the time. :D Layman's explanation of the whole thing, plus Newton and the shape of the universe and black holes and a lot of other cool stuff.
Jo_Pistachio 03-08-08, 12:04 AM	There now needs to be a prestige class for Warforged monks/unarmed sword sages where you throw your fists and they come back. Already did that thought experiment. Class used was Kensai.
Skrimshaw 03-10-08, 12:21 PM	The Flying Dwarven Hammer-Machine-Gun You can even do this without a feat investment or high strength. Items from a Hewards' Handy Haversack can be removed as a free action, then just drop em as a free. Can work with rocks or arrows too (assuming puncture rules apply and, if so, that arrows wont puncture the leather of a Haversack.)
Demithor 03-10-08, 02:08 PM	Just re-read my post and I *might* know what you're talking about. When I was talking about cutting diamonds I was referencing how delicate of a job it is because one wrong cut can completely shatter and ruin the stone. Isn't this what might happen if you roll a natural 1, as opposed to getting a critical hit?
Josheva 03-10-08, 04:04 PM	Yes, I'm afraid you did miss something. The quote in question:....comes from a great comedy spoof of Star Trek called Galaxy Quest. It was a great and comical way to point out that in D&D only something with a discernable and working anatomy is subject to critcal hits. I suppose that my problem was I quoted the wrong thing in my response. I know where the quote comes from, I was responding to the idea behind it. Also, inconsequentially, I did not find Galaxy Quest funny even in the slightest; It lacked subtlety.
dndfencer 03-10-08, 06:04 PM	Back to the railgun stuff Objects moving at high speed in DnD don't harm you, or at least the rules make no mention of this. So you could jump right in front of anything and not get harmed unless its an attack or a trample check. Also, teleport could be like falling, after all, falling technically take no time. If you could find some way of changing the direction of gravity, you've got a teleport spell (that unfortunately damages whoever it teleports). Best items though are things with weight negligible. Carry around an arbitrarily high number of them (after all there is no limit to the volume that you can carry) and then use them for everything from walls to landing cushions. PS could someone explain the wall of force being used to crush things?
Josheva 03-10-08, 07:01 PM	after all there is no limit to the volume that you can carry DND has rules for the volume of containers. If you are talking about the lack of rules regarding how much that you as a person can hold then I think that you are going a little to far. The intention is to abuse the rules written, not to make your own when a pre-existing one seems to be missing. Using contrapositives is a lame way of getting what you want :(. On the other hand, I suggest that you construct buildings, boats, flying machines, and vehicles out of weightless items :schemes:. Technically, by the rules, you could make a weightless castle!
TheFlyingAsian 03-10-08, 09:24 PM	No called shot rules: therefore you can't stake a vampire. Limited Wish to create a slightly-less-than-infinite number of clubs. Plane is destroyed in a supermassive black hole. Ummm... You can still petrify an Earth Elemental. You can carry an infinite amount of slings at no penalty. Mace of Smiting destroys constructs on a critical hit with no save. Constructs are immune to critical hits.
pedro2112 03-11-08, 01:16 AM	. You can carry an infinite amount of slings at no penalty. What moronic DM would allow that?
12Shark 03-11-08, 04:32 AM	*points at title of thread* :rolleyes:
dndfencer 03-11-08, 01:41 PM	Lets not forget spells and psionics Cerebremancer, Font of power temporal acceleration and summon astral construct. Summon as many constructs as possible right above opponents head also, temporal acceleration or time stop. Start running while continually casting temporal accel or time stop. Then, once you run out of power points fly straight into whatever you wish to destroy. If you have font of power you can run 40 (or some other ridiculous number) rounds worth ( with the augmented temporal accel) in one round. Add the fly spell to get 60 ft per round movement and you're moving at 2400 feet per round, or 600 ft per second. And what if you replace those 600 commoners with psions casting temporal accel, that should double the speed as each of their actions takes half as long. Then add boots of haste to multiply again by 1.5 (assuming a standard action is worth about half a round)
Josheva 03-11-08, 01:52 PM	Limited Wish to create a slightly-less-than-infinite number of clubs. Plane is destroyed in a supermassive black hole. I used to be a fan of summoning 2.5 million pounds of wheat using a wish spell until I looked a little more closely at the wording of the rules. Create a nonmagical item of up to 25,000 gp in value. So you can't create multiple clubs or pounds of wheat by the explicitly stated rules :(. Limited wish doesn't even say anything about creating items.
dndfencer 03-11-08, 02:11 PM	"So you can't create multiple clubs or pounds of wheat by the explicitly stated rules . Limited wish doesn't even say anything about creating items." Well, not necessarily. A bushel of wheat is one item despite the fact that it contains more than one strand of wheat. A quantity of an item should only be one item really. At the very least you should be able to create a ton of wheat. Just seems to me like disallowing someone to wish for a quantity of a bulk item is kind of silly.
Legdiwena 03-11-08, 04:19 PM	Isn't this what might happen if you roll a natural 1, as opposed to getting a critical hit? Maybe failing by more than 5, but not a 1. Since, a nat 1 is not a n automatic failure for skill checks.
Josheva 03-11-08, 04:20 PM	A bushel of wheat is one item despite the fact that it contains more than one strand of wheat. A perfect loop-hole that I have shamefully overlooked! Now if we can find a container worth less than 25,000gp that will hold a near infinite amount of clubs we can destroy the universe, or at least a small galaxy! Any suggestions? A balloon maybe?
Legdiwena 03-11-08, 04:39 PM	bundle of sticks
TheFlyingAsian 03-11-08, 09:51 PM	A perfect loop-hole that I have shamefully overlooked! Now if we can find a container worth less than 25,000gp that will hold a near infinite amount of clubs we can destroy the universe, or at least a small galaxy! Any suggestions? A balloon maybe? Well, a bundle of clubs, no matter how large, should still count as one "item", whether contained in something or not.
WolfHati 03-12-08, 02:08 AM	Another random thing to add: The up the walls feat lets you run up vertical surfaces, provided you end your turn on a horizontal surface, otherwise you fall. A ceiling is technically a horizontal surface.
Dux_is_me 03-12-08, 03:28 AM	Is it even a surface? :P More like an underface.
calronmoonflower 03-12-08, 03:29 AM	The dragon disciple prestige class requires you to be a non-dragon as a prerequisite. A 10th level dragon disciple becomes a dragon, so they no longer qualify for the prestige class and thus lose all class features. Which means that you qualify again and get all the class features back, which means you no longer qualify...
Ayra 03-12-08, 08:04 AM	The Flying Dwarven Hammer-Machine-Gun This one is pretty easy, I thought of it while discussing the contents of this thread with my brother. First, you need a dwarf, the higher the strength the better. Then you need to buy him a flying carpet (any magical item which allows fro flight will work) and as many Warhammers as you can get (crafting them your self is a good idea). Finally, give the dwarf the quickdraw feat. Have him fly above an enemy, the higher the better. Then, use a free action to draw a warhammer and a free action to drop it. Instant falling projectiles. Since all that is required is free actions, the only limit is from the DM. You could use any weapon, but warhammers are fun :D Wouldn't that work the same as someone carrying around a bag of holding filled with bricks? Fly above someone and flip over the bag of holding, pouring all its contents on your poor victim x.x
Zombie_Babies 03-12-08, 10:07 AM	Wouldn't that work the same as someone carrying around a bag of holding filled with bricks? Fly above someone and flip over the bag of holding, pouring all its contents on your poor victim x.x The whole idea is actually very limited by the RAW. The carpet and the bag both have weight limits. Carpet of Flying: Size Capacity Speed Weight Market Price 5 ft. by 5 ft. 200 lb. 40 ft. 8 lb. 20,000 gp 5 ft. by 10 ft. 400 lb. 40 ft. 10 lb. 35,000 gp 10 ft. by 10 ft. 800 lb. 40 ft. 15 lb. 60,000 gp Bag of Holding: Bag Bag Weight Contents Weight Limit Contents Volume Limit Market Price Type I 15 lb. 250 lb. 30 cu. ft. 2,500 gp Type II 25 lb. 500 lb. 70 cu. ft. 5,000 gp Type III 35 lb. 1,000 lb. 150 cu. ft. 7,400 gp Type IV 60 lb. 1,500 lb. 250 cu. ft. 10,000 gp Another problem with this exploit: Retrieving a specific item from a bag of holding is a move action—unless the bag contains more than an ordinary backpack would hold, in which case retrieving a specific item is a full-round action. But! There is this option: If a bag of holding is turned inside out, its contents spill out, unharmed, but the bag must be put right before it can be used again. So, it seems as though you could drop 1500lbs of hammers onto an unsuspecting foe- if you simply turn the bag inside out. This is the only way to make this happen. You are limited both by weight and action type. You can't Quickdraw from the bag, but you can turn it inside out. You'd most likely only need the first or second type of carpet, as well. So for 30-45k gp (not counting 1500lbs of hammers) and a lot of time to get the hammers into the bag, this can be done. But it wouldn't be any fun resetting that little experiment.... EDIT: More fun facts about this plan: You can only fit 300 Warhammers into the bag. It will cost you 3600gp to buy them. Only 300. Sounds like a headache to me. :D If you use regular hammers, you can fit 750 hammers into the bag. It will cost 75gp to buy them. They do damage as a spiked gauntlet, so there is a rule for damage there, as well. **Anyone feel like figuring out AoE and average damage for these options? :) I feel as though I have wasted enough of my life providing the information I already have for this silly but fun idea.
Sunic_Flames 03-12-08, 10:44 AM	Warhammers have a spike. Don't put them in there. Use something blunt. And remember, the bags weigh the same regardless of how much is in them.
Legdiwena 03-12-08, 11:18 AM	What about loading carpet with weightless items? They would still fall at same rate and do same damage, but you can load many more of them on carpet.
Sunic_Flames 03-12-08, 11:46 AM	Falling damage is based on weight. You could, by RAW drop a million objects each weighing .999 pounds from a height of 200 feet, and do absolutely no damage.
Silverthumb 03-12-08, 02:58 PM	Clubs are free, according to the PHB price lists. Fire wood isn't. Free Gold? Pfft, Scrub. http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=820859
Sunic_Flames 03-12-08, 03:22 PM	Free Gold? Pfft, Scrub. http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=820859 ... ... ... :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
Silverthumb 03-12-08, 05:48 PM	... ... ... :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: Let it be known that I was the one that broke the Level 1 Human Commoner build. :D
Ayra 03-13-08, 04:26 AM	Let it be known that I was the one that broke the Level 1 Human Commoner build. :D It was already broken. You could get a level 1 commoner maxing handle animal. Take the mercantile feat and buy as many cows as possible. Let them overrun your opponent (possibly by scaring the herd into the direction of your opponent) and watch as several hundred cows trample your poor victim. I unfortunately can't find the thread in which this was posted :(
Mercurius 03-13-08, 09:14 AM	And the commoner class qualifies right out of the box for the Survivor PrC from Savage Species. It's possible for a lvl 6 NPC (Commoner1/Survivor5) to have Improved Evasion, Improved Uncanny Dodge, DR 5/-, all good saves - 1 level, and no BAB. PCs will have a heck of a time dropping the old coot, but he's not really a threat anyway.
Sunic_Flames 03-13-08, 11:04 AM	Let it be known that I was the one that broke the Level 1 Human Commoner build. :D I :bow: to your optimization mastery.
Silverthumb 03-13-08, 01:04 PM	It was already broken. You could get a level 1 commoner maxing handle animal. Take the mercantile feat and buy as many cows as possible. Let them overrun your opponent (possibly by scaring the herd into the direction of your opponent) and watch as several hundred cows trample your poor victim. True, but I broke the Gold ownership rule. Infinite Gold = Infinite Cows = Infinite Trample! And the commoner class qualifies right out of the box for the Survivor PrC from Savage Species. It's possible for a lvl 6 NPC (Commoner1/Survivor5) to have Improved Evasion, Improved Uncanny Dodge, DR 5/-, all good saves - 1 level, and no BAB. PCs will have a heck of a time dropping the old coot, but he's not really a threat anyway. I intend to create a character based solely around the Cow Stampede, Chicken Slinger, and Survivor. EDIT: And ya know what? The hell with it, I'll make him a Forsaker! Man... I'm liking this too much. I'm going to have to make a Farmer PrC for this
dndfencer 03-13-08, 07:04 PM	I wonder if you could break a sorceror with a spell called "summon domestic animal' I would love to see the day when a sorcerer summons a cow to vanquish his foes. And for summon domestic animal II, III, IV, and so on we start adding templates until we end up with a fiendish, half-dragon, weretiger, monster of legend, ectoplasmic, tauric, cow. Or flock of chickens. Either one would be pretty scary. Better yet substitute the warhammers in the flying carpet build and rain down a fiery death by chicken. The only problem would be that the chickens would suffocate in the bag of holding unless you put oxygen in there.
jage 03-13-08, 07:48 PM	How about playing a half dragon-half awakened chicken and you could get drawn randomly by commoners with the flaw as a plot hook...
TheFlyingAsian 03-13-08, 07:51 PM	...Or [a] flock of chickens. Either one would be pretty scary. Oh my. Possibly the only think that brings fear into my heart...
Entropy_Judge 03-13-08, 08:15 PM	...Or flock of chickens. Either one would be pretty scary. I, too, have horrible nightmares of death by chicken ... well, they were LoZ chickens (cuckoos?), but it's still enough to make me scream at night.
Silverthumb 03-13-08, 08:46 PM	a fiery death by chicken Amulet of Natural Attacks(or whatever its called) +2 or that Infinite Arrows Quiver with the +1 ability, Flaming. If you're feeling adventerous, take another +1, and ahave Flaming & Distance. Then take the feat Throw Anything. A chicken could be argued to being an improvised weapon. Chickens weigh about 5 pounds(let's assume, for the sake of sakes), so I'd wager they would do about 1d4 damage, given they're softer than a Longsword. Since you're a Human Commoner using my brilliant gold-loop(I hope), you can easily afford that magic item. Get a +5, and then you'll have infinite +2 Flaming Distance Chickens. Take the Thrown-Weapon Master(whatever, I'm forgetting everything's name today, if that's not it) and you'll be a Flaming-Chicken Slinging Master.
Legdiwena 03-13-08, 09:12 PM	Wouldn't you need +2 for flaming?
Silverthumb 03-13-08, 09:33 PM	Wouldn't you need +2 for flaming? What?
Legdiwena 03-13-08, 10:00 PM	Since you're enchanting it as a weapon, don't you need to make it +1 before adding properties?
Silverthumb 03-13-08, 10:05 PM	First I've heard of it. What page of the DMG is that on? EDIT: just a side note, if I am wrong, I really would like to be corrected on the matter. I'm just saying this because some other things today have been taken wildly out of context, and I didn't want that to be one of them(on the chance that I'm saying things a differetn way then how I say them). Not being a douche, I just wanna be accurate. :D
Douglasm 03-14-08, 12:12 AM	Page 221, Weapons section, third paragraph, last sentence. Or third paragraph, last sentence, in this section of the SRD (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/magicItems/magicWeapons.htm). There is a similar rule for armor as well.
Silverthumb 03-14-08, 12:30 AM	Page 221, Weapons section, third paragraph, last sentence. Or third paragraph, last sentence, in this section of the SRD (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/magicItems/magicWeapons.htm). There is a similar rule for armor as well. Ahhh, OK. Thank you! I'll fix my other post, then. But its still pretty awesome to have +2 Flaming Distance Chickens. ;)
Wih 03-14-08, 12:57 AM	Ahhh, OK. Thank you! I'll fix my other post, then. But its still pretty awesome to have +2 Flaming Distance Chickens. ;) Your cluck-fu is weak. (http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=844086)
Silverthumb 03-14-08, 09:22 AM	Your cluck-fu is weak. (http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=844086) Ugh, you're right, but what an ugly cluttered mess of multiclassing. :noway:
Tectorman 03-14-08, 04:23 PM	Ahhh, OK. Thank you! I'll fix my other post, then. But its still pretty awesome to have +2 Flaming Distance Chickens. ;) I'm not quite sure what Douglasm was getting at, but you don't necessarily need to have a new enhancement added for each special weapon quality (i.e., it's perfectly fine to have a +1 Flaming Distance Chicken). You need the +1 first, but after that you can add Flaming Distance Holy Vorpal to the end of it (chickens can do slashing damage, right?). Also, put the "Half (Iron) Golem" template on the chicken.
Sunic_Flames 03-14-08, 05:42 PM	Flaming Burst Chicken. Awesome weapon, and dinner. Because every adventurer needs his fill of Fried Chicken. :D
Josheva 03-14-08, 05:53 PM	The only problem would be that the chickens would suffocate in the bag of holding unless you put oxygen in there. The flaw explicitly states that the chicken are alive ;).
Jakonen 03-15-08, 02:36 AM	1. The Commoner Railgun: Need to take out that castle? Just hire six-hundred commoners (a GP per commoner will make them jump for joy) to stand in line and pass a large rock (a move action) to the guy next to him and so on all the way to the castle. Assuming they all finish their move actions in three seconds, you have a rock moving at 1000ft/sec. G'bye wall! I think we can start a medieval space program with that meathod
tharivol266 03-15-08, 12:04 PM	with the commoner railgun you can get it going much faster if you have them all ready an action to give it to the next guy instead of using their move action so the rock would move all that distance in the span of a free action. just have the last guy ready "i let go". and the best thing about this is that you can have your gun curve around hills and such
Douglasm 03-15-08, 02:07 PM	The problem with the commoner railgun is that it mixes D&D physics and real-world physics, and that just doesn't work without a cooperative DM. If you're playing by RAW, then you need to use D&D physics and D&D physics only. If you're playing by "how it would really work", then you need to apply real-world physics everywhere it is reasonable to do so. By D&D physics, the last commoner drops the item and it falls straight down to the ground at his feet. If he throws it, it goes just as far and fast as if he'd been holding it the whole time. Sure, you've moved something halfway around the world, but at each step along the way it is stationary. Each 5' transfer from one commoner to the next is essentially instantaneous teleportation and does not impart any momentum or kinetic energy to the object - such concepts don't even exist in D&D physics. By real-world physics, people can't pass things along that fast anyway, so you don't even get to the last guy throwing it without waiting far too long, and it's not moving any faster than it should when it gets there.
Half_Dragon_Infernal 03-15-08, 03:43 PM	Douglasm, you removed all the fun!! :raincloud
tharivol266 03-15-08, 04:18 PM	yeah really. silly is in the title of the thread for a reason. earlier there was a ring gate and rod of iron black hole generator. with a similar setup using several sets of ring gates (100lb/day limit), a 1lb lead ball and an aluminum case can make a not quite instant cannon
Josheva 03-21-08, 04:32 AM	The problem with the commoner railgun is that it mixes D&D physics and real-world physics, and that just doesn't work without a cooperative DM. We know, we know, we know that it won't work! Read the title of the thread! Sheesh!
larry_the_titan 03-21-08, 07:55 AM	The problem with the commoner railgun is that it mixes D&D physics and real-world physics, You should just said that 'When ever you mix Real world Physics and D&D Mechanics a Catgirl dies'. Its the easiest comment you could make.
Janzen 03-21-08, 08:16 AM	I, too, have horrible nightmares of death by chicken ... well, they were LoZ chickens (cuckoos?), but it's still enough to make me scream at night. That reminds me of Zelda soo much, I used to use Din's Fire on one chicken and every chicken from the village came to attack me.
etraikov 03-21-08, 01:11 PM	Step 1: Hire 10,000 commoners. Have one of them move into the basement of a castle. Then, have the second commoner move up to the first commoner and grapple him. Since they are grappling, they occupy the same 5 ft square. Then, get the third commoner to go up and grapple the first 2 commoners. Repeat this process 9997 more times until you have all 10,000 commoners within a 5 ft cube in the basement of this castle. Step 2: Step back. Step 3: Tell all the commoners to let go of each other. Step 4: Watch explosion of said castle. Step 5: ??? Step 6: Profit!
Sunic_Flames 03-21-08, 01:15 PM	Step 1: Hire 10,000 commoners. Have one of them move into the basement of a castle. Then, have the second commoner move up to the first commoner and grapple him. Since they are grappling, they occupy the same 5 ft square. Then, get the third commoner to go up and grapple the first 2 commoners. Repeat this process 9997 more times until you have all 10,000 commoners within a 5 ft cube in the basement of this castle. Step 2: Step back. Step 3: Tell all the commoners to let go of each other. Step 4: Watch explosion of said castle. Step 5: ??? Step 6: Profit! This reminds me of that gay ball on South Park. :P
Toloran 03-22-08, 12:36 PM	*EDIT: I'm stupid, ignore*
Half_Dragon_Infernal 03-22-08, 12:44 PM	XXX) Shatter can target clothes.
Jo_Pistachio 03-23-08, 03:31 AM	XXX+1) Use true create to make your own corpse, then polymorph any object it into you. Then kill it, dispel it and psionic revivify it. It returns to life and stays that way permanently.
Sunic_Flames 03-23-08, 10:03 AM	Doesn't the whole lack of soul thing (because you're alive) ruin that?
Jo_Pistachio 03-23-08, 01:09 PM	Shouldn't. It had some semblence of one when it died, due to the nature of PAO, making it a legitimate target according to the text in psionic revivify.
Sunic_Flames 03-23-08, 01:32 PM	XXX+2: Polymorph Any Object. One look at its uses eliminates the need for any illustration. :P
Jo_Pistachio 03-23-08, 02:07 PM	It's my favourite spell. :P
jage 03-24-08, 12:25 AM	Step 1: Hire 10,000 commoners. Have one of them move into the basement of a castle. Then, have the second commoner move up to the first commoner and grapple him. Since they are grappling, they occupy the same 5 ft square. Then, get the third commoner to go up and grapple the first 2 commoners. Repeat this process 9997 more times until you have all 10,000 commoners within a 5 ft cube in the basement of this castle. Step 2: Step back. Step 3: Tell all the commoners to let go of each other. Step 4: Watch explosion of said castle. Step 5: ??? Step 6: Profit! Nice, but you might end up with commoner pâté instead!
Josheva 03-24-08, 03:10 AM	...Repeat this process 9997 more times until you have all 10,000 commoners within a 5 ft cube in the basement of this castle. This technique has much synergy with the supreme cleave + whirlwind attack technique. You could get 10 000+ attacks on one enemy this way, or even travel through 10 000+ 5 foot squares if you could cause the commoner ball to move with you. The horrifying mess of exploding corpses might be a bit overwhelming though. Also, just toying with quantum physics, but I wonder how many commoners it would take, using the railgun method, to accelerate an object to the point that its new mass would create a gravitational force so great that it would consumes the entire commoner line? That could be amusing, though I suspect that the amount of commoners needed would be insanely high. On a side note, it would probably send the world cascading out of orbit to do so...
jage 03-24-08, 10:01 AM	You mean like pass commoners with a commoner railgun and have each one grapple in the same 5ft square until enough mass is reached to create a black hole?
Josheva 03-25-08, 12:07 AM	You mean like pass commoners with a commoner railgun and have each one grapple in the same 5ft square until enough mass is reached to create a black hole? Not at all. I am not combining the two destruction-by-commoners methods. In quantum physics, when something approaches the speed of light it is treated as having a mass much greater than what it actually is. Since gravitational force is based on mass, when something approaches the speed of light it can aquire a much greater gravitational force. Hence, if you could get something moving fast enough via the commoner railgun method, that item could acquire a sufficient gravitational force to suck all of the commoners along with it while it travels. It's just a funny mental picture that I get from it; the commoners passing the item to the left would subsequently be violently hurled towards the left as a direct result of their actions.
jage 03-25-08, 12:16 AM	Wouldn't the commoners further to the left waiting for the pass be pulled right by the same gravitational force? Also as the mass increases wouldn't the strength of the next commoner also have to increase? Plus it would get HOT. Or really cold. I can't think you're right I'm laughing too hard at the imagery!
Notmonk_of_Doom 03-25-08, 12:20 PM	This technique has much synergy with the supreme cleave + whirlwind attack technique. You could get 10 000+ attacks on one enemy this way, or even travel through 10 000+ 5 foot squares if you could cause the commoner ball to move with you. The horrifying mess of exploding corpses might be a bit overwhelming though. This is wonderful! ....except that Whirlwind Attack specifies that you can't get any extra attacks during the use of it from anything else. Whoops.
Josheva 03-25-08, 01:32 PM	I can't think you're right I'm laughing too hard at the imagery! I know that it's flawed, I just felt that it was too funny of an image not to point out :P. ....except that Whirlwind Attack specifies that you can't get any extra attacks during the use of it from anything else. Whoops. I only pointed this out after hearing the bag-of-rats theory, but it appears that you have just disproved that loophole :eek:. However, how about a fighter with whirlwind attack and the necrocarnum shroud ability from magic of incarnum? Assuming you hit 1/20 of the 10000 grappling commoners you now have +9500 to hit and damage on your next round (Or maybe on your current round?) Heres the rules for necrocarnum shroud: You force necrocarnum to shape a life-draining field around you. While you have necrocarnum shroud shaped, you gain a +1 profane bonus on attack rolls and damage rolls any time a living creature takes damage while adjacent to you. This bonus lasts for 1 round. If a living creature dies while adjacent to you, the bonus instead lasts for a number of rounds equal to the creature's Hit Dice. Essentia: If you invest essentia in the necrocarnum shroud the area encompassed by the life-draining field expands [by 5ft per essentia]. On the off note, has anybody else developed a sudden, immense fear of an army of level 1 soulborn fighters with this soulmeld shaped?
MaD_DiCe_RoLLa 03-25-08, 01:35 PM	I read through all 6 pages of this thread and all I could think of were the silly things we were going to do with a Vow of Poverty Monk in the last campaign I played in. It involved ship combat (I was a dread pirate) and just general sea-faring. Some interesting things about monks are: Their fists eventually take on the adamantine property, which ignores hardness. We had an ogre on the crew (My Dread Pirate speaks Giant and has a rediculously high diplomacy, promised him lotsa money) and we got him an ogre sized ballistae. Fire said monk out of said ballistae = a hull punching, ship sinking, monk of Doom. Eventually the monk no longer needs to breathe. He was going to weigh himself down and run on the ocean floor, which, sadly, is a whole lot faster than any ship in this friggin game can go. After he gets the ability to not need to breathe, we were going to keep him in a bag of holding and use him like a pokemon "Haiiro, I choose YOU!" Theres a limitless amount of silly things you can do with a high level VoP monk hiding in a small leather sack. :mymy:
Josheva 03-25-08, 01:43 PM	MONK TO THE FACE! Really though, I like the idea of the monk ammunition :D. I would say that the force of the water would stop the monk from running in the water, it would be difficult terrain at least. However, with the ability to ignore difficult terrain and a freedom of movement spell it might be possible :). BTW: I would paint the bag of holding red and white to resemble a pok-e-ball then rub mercury or bees-wax into it to harden it :D.
Sunic_Flames 03-25-08, 01:53 PM	:rofl: :cookie: for Dice.
SokenzanMarauder 03-25-08, 06:55 PM	Heres the rules for necrocarnum shroud: On the off note, has anybody else developed a sudden, immense fear of an army of level 1 soulborn fighters with this soulmeld shaped?:eek: Holy crap. That is nasty!
Josheva 03-25-08, 08:01 PM	Holy crap. That is nasty! I didn't even realize the power of the soulmeld until I wrote that post. The 12th level soulborn leader with 3 essentia invested into the soulmeld would be horrifying :eek:. Anyways, here's a nifty trick I just thought of. How about thousands of fine sized animated objects clinging to you clothes and providing "aid another" bonuses to every roll you make? Hell, just animate every individual piece of clothing itself. Buttons, laces, jewelery... this could get ridiculous.
Avatar of Kokusho 03-25-08, 08:44 PM	My husband once threatened to have a bunch of dancing weapons with the defending property on them...like 100 of them...only catch was figuring out how to activate them all in a single round. I suggested a modified Glove of Storing.
Wih 03-26-08, 12:41 AM	My husband once threatened to have a bunch of dancing weapons with the defending property on them...like 100 of them...only catch was figuring out how to activate them all in a single round. I suggested a modified Glove of Storing. The real abuse there is with Defending Shuriken. Since they're treated as ammunition, you can craft 50 of them for the price of one. 50 +1 Defending Shuriken cost 8000gp and give +50 to AC that stacks with everything, for a total cost of 160 per point of AC boost.
Josheva 03-26-08, 01:05 AM	Except that defending cannot be added to ranged weapons.
zeratulcraft 03-26-08, 01:07 AM	Step 1: Hire 10,000 commoners. Have one of them move into the basement of a castle. Then, have the second commoner move up to the first commoner and grapple him. Since they are grappling, they occupy the same 5 ft square. Then, get the third commoner to go up and grapple the first 2 commoners. Repeat this process 9997 more times until you have all 10,000 commoners within a 5 ft cube in the basement of this castle. Step 2: Step back. Step 3: Tell all the commoners to let go of each other. Step 4: Watch explosion of said castle. Step 5: ??? Step 6: Profit! A pity that there's rules on the maximum number of targets who can be grappling any one creature at a time, huh? Multiple Grapplers Several combatants can be in a single grapple. Up to four combatants can grapple a single opponent in a given round. Creatures that are one or more size categories smaller than you count for half, creatures that are one size category larger than you count double, and creatures two or more size categories larger count quadruple. http://www.d20srd.org/srd/combat/specialAttacks.htm#grapple
RPJesus 03-26-08, 01:18 AM	Wait, there's a way around this if you wanna get nitpicky. Up to four people can grapple player A So you have A-BCDE BCDE are grappling A only So A-BCDE B-FGHI C-JKLM D-NOPQ E-RSTU Granted it's clearly not the intent, but hey :D.
MorandirNailo 03-26-08, 01:55 AM	Anyways, here's a nifty trick I just thought of. How about thousands of fine sized animated objects clinging to you clothes and providing "aid another" bonuses to every roll you make? Hell, just animate every individual piece of clothing itself. Buttons, laces, jewelery... this could get ridiculous. This one has been done - Behold, Nanobot goodness! (http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=458721&highlight=nanobot) More on-topic, you can buy a cow (or other large animal), cast Flesh to Salt on it, and sell the salt for way more than the cow is worth. Fun! Mor
Sunic_Flames 03-26-08, 09:15 AM	This one has been done - Behold, Nanobot goodness! (http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=458721&highlight=nanobot) More on-topic, you can buy a cow (or other large animal), cast Flesh to Salt on it, and sell the salt for way more than the cow is worth. Fun! Mor I was thinking the same thing. :P
Realms of Chaos 03-26-08, 08:07 PM	An old favorite, using true creation to create the densist and most radioactive substances in existance (or at least the maximum amount of TNT or nitroglycerine you can manage).
Demetri_Knighthawk 03-27-08, 10:56 PM	A commoner has a 50% chance of being killed at the paws of a house cat (even with chicken pulling feats). So, my bard who was planning to go arcane trickster had to stop off and dip into assassin for 1 level due to plot. He uses a scroll to summon monster 1 and requested 2 non celestial house cats, then cast rage on the cats and threw them at a commoner. At first the GM was shocked, he knew about the 50-50 odds, then smiled as the cats slew the commoner, not the bard. so now when my bard gets irked he threatens to put a raging cat in someone's pants. which we all laugh at the innuendos available. "is that a raging cat in your pants or are you happy to see me?"
calronmoonflower 03-28-08, 03:22 AM	Nothing actually says that you must have an arrow to shot a bow.
Myria- 03-28-08, 11:46 PM	In DR 1966, Andy Dufresne escaped from Baldur's Gate prison. All they found of him was a muddy set of prison clothes, a bar of soap, and an old rock hammer, damn near worn down to the nub. I used to think it would take six-hundred years to tunnel under the wall with it. Old Andy did it in less than twenty. Oh, Andy loved Knowledge: (Geology), I guess it appealed to his meticulous nature. An ice age here, million years of mountain building there. Geology is the study of pressure and time. That's all it takes really, pressure, and time. That, and a big god-damned tapestry. Like I said, in prison a man will do anything to keep his mind occupied. It turns out Andy's favourite hobby was totin' his wall through the exercise yard, a handful at a time. I guess after Tommy was killed, he decided he had been here just about long enough. Andy did like he was told, buffed those riding boots to a high mirror shine. The guard simply didn't notice, neither did I... I mean, seriously, how often do you really look at a mans riding boots? Andy crawled to freedom through five-hundred yards of ****-smelling foulness I can't even imagine, or maybe I just don't want too. Five-Hundred yards... that's the length of five football fields, just shy of half a mile. I LOL'd so freakin hard! ROFLMAO Oh but you missed a subtle change (football fields). Those not exist in medieval settings (maybe 5 pirate galleys?). The rest were great tho'. ^^
Wih 03-30-08, 07:34 PM	Except that defending cannot be added to ranged weapons. Not true - quotes from the SRD listed in the spoiler to show otherwise. Defending A defending weapon allows the wielder to transfer some or all of the sword’s enhancement bonus to his AC as a bonus that stacks with all others. As a free action, the wielder chooses how to allocate the weapon’s enhancement bonus at the start of his turn before using the weapon, and the effect to AC lasts until his next turn. Moderate abjuration; CL 8th; Craft Magic Arms and Armor, shield or shield of faith; Price +1 bonus. Doesn't say it can't be on ranged weapons, or is melee only. For comparison: (emphasis mine) Distance This property can only be placed on a ranged weapon. A weapon of distance has double the range increment of other weapons of its kind. Moderate divination; CL 6th; Craft Magic Arms and Armor, clairaudience/clairvoyance; Price +1 bonus. Throwing This ability can only be placed on a melee weapon. A melee weapon crafted with this ability gains a range increment of 10 feet and can be thrown by a wielder proficient in its normal use. Faint transmutation; CL 5th; Craft Magic Arms and Armor, magic stone; Price +1 bonus. Even if for some reason you could only place Defending on melee weapons, Arrows can be used in melee at a -4: Arrows An arrow used as a melee weapon is treated as a light improvised weapon (-4 penalty on attack rolls) and deals damage as a dagger of its size (critical multiplier ×2). Arrows come in a leather quiver that holds 20 arrows. An arrow that hits its target is destroyed; one that misses has a 50% chance of being destroyed or lost. Remember - this is silly flaws in the game. There's no way any sane GM would allow this - it just technically works, that's all.
Josheva 04-01-08, 04:57 PM	Well, I was mostly going off of the property existing in the melee weapons chart and not in the ranged weapons charts. However, if you are favouring RAW over logic, the point of this thread, I know, the property can only be added to swords. Sillyness countered by sillyness ftw :P.
Sunic_Flames 04-01-08, 05:06 PM	Well, I was mostly going off of the property existing in the melee weapons chart and not in the ranged weapons charts. However, if you are favouring RAW over logic, the point of this thread, I know, the property can only be added to swords. Sillyness countered by sillyness ftw :P. Text trumps tables, for the win. :P
tharivol266 04-01-08, 05:19 PM	countering your counter with even more sillyness. a sword is just a long knife correct? correct. the middle shuriken on pg 115 of the phb looks like a knife without the hilt right? right Therefore using RAD(rules as drawn) one could argue that a shuriken could be equivilent to a tiny, hiltless sword therefore eligible for the magic ability.
Josheva 04-02-08, 05:40 PM	Yet more sillyness: The rules state that "A defending weapon allows the weilder..." Weapons are innanimate objects and cannot perform actions such as defending something.
Legdiwena 04-03-08, 03:01 PM	Could rotate through 4 +5 dancing, defending weapons. Have them apply full bonus to your AC.
calronmoonflower 04-04-08, 03:33 AM	Play a warblade with sunlight issues and you can use Iron Heart Surge to put out the sun.
Pezz 04-04-08, 06:07 AM	A bloodstorm blade can treat throwing a weapon as a melee attack. A reach weapon can be thrown at an adjacent target. In addition, if that bloodstorm blade were to have quickdraw, he could throw that reach weapon against an adjacent target as many times as he has attacks (with a second weapon), and get an additional attack against each character who gets an attack of opportunity against him.
tharivol266 04-14-08, 10:45 AM	halfdragon warforged.
tharivol266 04-30-08, 12:22 PM	I am at work on lunch break so i cannot check the books on this one but i just thought of it. Clone+lich. you cast clone then go through the lichification process which the last step is "kill yourself" and your soul goes into the phylactery and also into the clone. ergo your soul gets split and you get a lichy version of you and a fleshy version. there are no penalties for a split soul. then have the clone version repeat until you have an army of "one".
6163 05-01-08, 04:11 PM	The only problem would be that the chickens would suffocate in the bag of holding unless you put oxygen in there. Sorry to bring this back up, but if you "filled" a bag of holding with as many weightless items as you could get your hands on and had that chicken flaw, if you emptied the bag by turning it inside out is there a 50% chance that they will all turn into chickens?
High Octane 05-01-08, 10:01 PM	In DR 1966, Andy Dufresne escaped from Baldur's Gate prison. All they found of him was a muddy set of prison clothes, a bar of soap, and an old rock hammer, damn near worn down to the nub. I used to think it would take six-hundred years to tunnel under the wall with it. Old Andy did it in less than twenty. Oh, Andy loved Knowledge: (Geology), I guess it appealed to his meticulous nature. An ice age here, million years of mountain building there. Geology is the study of pressure and time. That's all it takes really, pressure, and time. That, and a big god-damned tapestry. Like I said, in prison a man will do anything to keep his mind occupied. It turns out Andy's favourite hobby was totin' his wall through the exercise yard, a handful at a time. I guess after Tommy was killed, he decided he had been here just about long enough. Andy did like he was told, buffed those riding boots to a high mirror shine. The guard simply didn't notice, neither did I... I mean, seriously, how often do you really look at a mans riding boots? Andy crawled to freedom through five-hundred yards of ****-smelling foulness I can't even imagine, or maybe I just don't want too. Five-Hundred yards... that's the length of five football fields, just shy of half a mile. You sir, have earned a cookie. :cookie: