Post/Author/DateTime	Post
Ikeman04 02-15-08, 07:34 PM	This isn't a case of people telling me that my gaming habits will lead to hell, but I still think it's imortant, even if I'm the only one. The problem is that, recently, I heard from someone(I forget who) a good idea on how to make myself a better person: you put a rubber band on your wrist and try to go twenty-seven days without complaining verbally. Every time you do, you switch what wrist the band is on, and you want to keep the band on the same wrist for the aforementioned amount of time(this is honestly harder than it sounds, try it yourself). The eventual goal is that you train yourself not to be one of those people who spend all their time moaning and bellyaching. I'm going to a game on Saturday, and a different one on Monday. I want to know if in-character complaining would qualify. I know that the obvious answer is that it shouldn't, but(for whatever reason) that seems like a cop-out to me. Any advice is appreciated.
Etarnon 02-15-08, 07:35 PM	Don't act, just say your lines.
MacrossSD 02-15-08, 07:38 PM	Of course it shouldn't. No more than an actor should be held responsible for the actions his character takes in a play, movie, or TV show. One question, if it isn't prying though -- why 27? Wouldn't it make more sense for it to be 28 days (or a full four weeks)?
Ikeman04 02-15-08, 07:45 PM	I don't know why it's 27, but that's how I heard it. BTW, thanks. You've both put my head to ease.
Cedric_the_Lucky 02-16-08, 12:06 AM	Maybe I'm missing something but forcing yourself to never verbally complain about anything does not make you a better person (unless you ***** and moan non-stop then I could see the reasoning), a small amount of complaining is not a bad thing when required otherwise you become a doormat.
kelvinaw273 02-16-08, 03:08 AM	Does it make you a better person or just a more sociable one? If it changes just the way you behave, that's one thing, if it changes the way you think to a more positive outlook that's another.
Eldritch_Id 02-16-08, 03:54 AM	The rubber-band idea reminds me of the Stoic philosophy. Stoicism (abridged) is the philosopical practice of not acknowledging pleasure or pain. It's essentially trying to train you to focus on the world around you instead of your own naturally self-absorbed inner-world, so to speak; trying to be more aware of the world around you instead of your own wants/thoughts/desires. Same reasoning behind many religious tenets. OK, now I want you to consider this (a little piece from my sig): 'It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.' -Aristotle I don't believe one can act a personality they don't have (which is why I think actors sometimes have difficulty 'leaving a character behind'). If you study interpersonal communication theory, social interaction is all an act and you have multiple inner characters within you for different social situations. A mentally healthy and mature person can select an appropriate personality to 'put-on'; that's social maturity. I think role-playing can help work towards becoming a more socially mature person, just like creative writing. But so can practicing not complaining. The trick is making sure you can seperate the inner and outer worlds. I'll readily volunteer, however, that role-playing games are a bad idea for someone that has difficulty controlling themselves socially (example: encouraging someone with multiple personality disorder to imagine their someone else - especially a sword-wielding wizard of incredible power - probably not a smart suggestion outside of a controlled setting...with tranquilizers). IMHO, training yourself to be able to acknowledge both inner and outer worlds is a greater goal. :twocents:
Sinfire Titan 02-16-08, 03:56 AM	Wouldn't it make more sense for it to be 28 days (or a full four weeks)? Well, everyone knows what happens 28 days later. :P
molten_dragon 02-16-08, 09:31 AM	I would say as long as you aren't complaining in-character about the rubber band (which would needless to say be quite strange, since the character isn't wearing one) you're fine.
CryoSilver 02-16-08, 10:06 AM	I'd say it doesn't count to complain IC. I also suspect that not verbally complaining for 27 days isgoing to turn you into a passive aggressive jerk, based on what I've seen happen in the past.
Ikeman04 02-16-08, 10:36 AM	I'm not exactely thinking that if I don't complain, it will automatically make me a better person, I'm doing it to try to get a more positive outlook on things. It's just that, around lots of people, conversation is started with a complaint(i.e. "you know what ticks me off?"). I want to get out of the habit of starting conversations with complaints, as well as using rhetorical questions, but that's a different story. And regarding what Eldritch Id said, I'm kind of in the same boat. I base all of my characters off of a decent-sized portion of myself, and the real problem is that I think that if I'm basically trying to put myself in the game, then complaining in character feels like myself complaining.
navar100 02-16-08, 12:03 PM	Well, everyone knows what happens 28 days later. :P That Dawned on me too last Night during our game fighting the Resident Evil bad guy Shaun. Ok, I stop now.
Sinfire Titan 02-16-08, 02:30 PM	That Dawned on me too last Night during our game fighting the Resident Evil bad guy Shaun. Ok, I stop now. :D
Eldritch_Id 02-17-08, 01:49 AM	I'm not exactely thinking that if I don't complain, it will automatically make me a better person, I'm doing it to try to get a more positive outlook on things. It's just that, around lots of people, conversation is started with a complaint(i.e. "you know what ticks me off?"). I want to get out of the habit of starting conversations with complaints, as well as using rhetorical questions, but that's a different story... ...I base all of my characters off of a decent-sized portion of myself, and the real problem is that I think that if I'm basically trying to put myself in the game, then complaining in character feels like myself complaining. Sounds like you're using role-playing to explore your own personality & psyche. I do the same thing (my Elder Scrolls 4 character looks exactly like me - scares friends & family when I go to the menu screens). If you are looking to still use the game to that end, then play a character that would be a role model for your positive outloo --> play a character that doesn't complain.
Josheva 02-17-08, 04:05 AM	It's just that, around lots of people, conversation is started with a complaint. I want to get out of the habit of starting conversations with complaints, as well as using rhetorical questions, but that's a different story. Self improvement is the element of life that I value above all others. A very long time ago this lead me to resolve that everything I say would be significant in some way. I do not often complain, and I do not often talk about things that I care little about. This has lead to me being a very quiet person. It is a semi-regular thing for me to sit down through an entire meal, which takes 1-2 hours including the post-meal conversation, without saying even one word. I listen to what others are saying and only feel the need to speak myself if I have something significant to add to the conversation. My point is that when you resolve to change who you are, even when you believe that it is for the better, you must be fully aware of where that change is going to lead you. There are not many people in the world who would choose the way of life that I have just described, and it was arrived at through the persuit of widely accepted ideals. Don't work towards an ideal that you do not actually prefer just because it seems like it would make you a better person. Anyways, on the subject of your elastic band conundrum, I would say that your DND character is not you, and therefore, you are not complaining when he is. However, it is oviously not my opinion that matters, but yours. So, here is my advice: if you are unsure of what is right, judge on the side that would create a better situation for yourself and others. Additionally, DND is a game, there is no need to reduce your enjoyment of it by rigorously applying your beliefs to it.
JimProfit 02-17-08, 04:19 AM	Heh, best thing i did to improve myself lately was not to cheat on my girlfriend. And even that took alot of effort lol! *Neo voice* I am not the one.:P
Josheva 02-17-08, 04:31 AM	Talk about a mood shift! :D