Post/Author/DateTime	Post
Aladdar 07-14-05, 11:00 AM	I'm trying a different approach. Everyone in the group will be handed the first few pages of my character's journal. It hints at who he is, where he came from, and why he's adventurining. There will also be a sheet of course with my physical description, etc... But let me know if this hints enough at my character. I don't want to give too much away as he's going to be the mysterious character. Of course they'll figure it out quickly, but it might be fun and I'll still play him grasping for truth. Anyways, here it is, the first few pages of his diary. "The Hollow Fields of wars gone by The ghoul that follows in the night Are not so foul as starless skies These lights that fill my souls dark plight." Curse... my... birth... Curse the day I felt the mark. Curse my soul to the depths of the night. I... am... dead... Dying, whithered on the inside. My heart still beats but the grief is gone. Replaced by numbness deeper than death itself. I am who I am, the killer of dreams, of joy, of hope. I am undone. I seek for light, for laughter to once again envelope me, but I find only darkness. Misery. Frustration. Peace is too violent to grasp, too hard to control, too distant to be achieved. Who am I? Why am I? What will I become? I sit alone, mumbling, seeking for an answer... But I find none. ------------------------------ You are confused? aye, it seems so. I do not deny it. Count me in with your lot. I am Illian Martel, a man who has lost the desire to hope. A shell of my former self. But I shall go on, I shall endure. I have no other choice but to die, but death is not as easy a challenge to take. I fear it, I shy away, I run from the final rest. So you have not run I see, have not turned your face from me. Do you desire to know me more? To plumb the depths of my soul? Seek, it is open. Listen, you may learn. ------------------------------ I was once a happy child, the village pet it seemed. Smiles, laughter, joy followed my every movement. My family was worthy, worthy of the joy they posessed and radiated as the sun itself. Why were they cursed with me? I killed them, drove them into the grave as well as if I had done it with my own two hands. I did not of course, but I did it as well as any man ever could have. It was the night I first grasped my "gift" as we called it. I was 13, things had begun to change. I had begun to feel the currents of the world in a way many will never know. It was as if I could reach out and touch things that could not be seen, to control them at times. I grasped it and manipulated things, events, situations that most would not think possible. I killed all who I loved. I rained fire upon all who breathed that night. They are as dead as my soul feels. And yet he felt I could be redeemed? That I could find the path to redemption. Where would I go, what would I find? To find myself he said. I laughed, I am lost. You believe, you insist? ... Fine, where must I begin? ... To the East he said... I will find it when the time is right? His words had best hold true. ----------------------------- For the first time I sat and allowed myself to dream of a life beyond my misery. A light seemingly within grasp, miles away, but burning for the first time. I awoke and rose, leaving behind all but my walking stick and my journal. For the first time I... I hoped... And took my first steps towards my destiny. ----------------------------- (And so begins the first pages of Illian Martel's Journal, "The Tales of The Prodigal".)
Eros 07-14-05, 12:21 PM	I think the story in the journal is well written however I am still at a loss as to what the character is. The subtle hits you gave really still leave the door open to just about anything. The character could really be a strange creature of some kind, he could have a unique blood line, or he could simply be a man who is just beginning to discovering his psionic or arcane abilities from what I read. If you want to give them some hit as to what you are maybe a little more might be required, just my opinion. Eros
Aladdar 07-14-05, 12:30 PM	The basic backstory is that he is a sorceror. When he first began developing his talents he accidentally killed his family so he ran blaming himself and his evil self. He ran into the mountains and became a hermit living a life of misery and hate in a cave. He was visited by another mysterious character (who's history I'll let the DM decide) who convinced him that he could be more than a family killer, so he left to find why he is who he is.
Eros 07-14-05, 01:04 PM	Okay, got it. Maybe decide what the actual spell or spells were that you accidentally killed your family with and have the character write about a “flash back” to the incident where he briefly describes some of the spell effects or what the aftermath was like. “The horror of seeing his youngest sister’s body shriveled and charred in the corner, her remains almost entirely turned to ash was just too much for Illian. His mind began to shut down as everything started to go dark…. …he hated the fire from within him.” Eros
Vinex Ridel 07-14-05, 01:59 PM	I like the whole idea. Very creative. Though, I must say after seeing Eros's suggestion, I like that much more. Use both pyshical and emotional remembrance of the family your sorcerer once killed, and also add in what he feels at the present time. Otherwise, it's very well thought out. :)
Aram al'Castor 07-14-05, 02:33 PM	I like the concept. Very original. Id have to agree with those who posted above and say that more physical and emotional descriptions would be good, but on the other hand that would probably make too apparent as to what happened in your characters past. Based upon what you said earlier I'm not sure that would be something you would want.
Tiran 07-14-05, 05:19 PM	lol my friend used almost the same backstory with a sorcerer of his. The journal's a nice touch though.
Aladdar 07-14-05, 05:55 PM	Is this better? "The Hollow Fields of wars gone by The ghoul that follows in the night Are not so foul as starless skies The lights blinked out, my soul has died." ---------------------------- Curse... my... birth... Curse the day I felt the mark. Curse my soul to the depths of the night. I... am... dead... Dying, whithered on the inside. My heart still beats but the grief is gone. Replaced by numbness deeper than death itself. I am who I am, the killer of dreams, of joy, of hope. I am undone. I seek for light, for laughter to once again envelope me, but I find only darkness. Misery. Frustration. Peace is too violent to grasp, too hard to control, too distant to be achieved. Who am I? Why am I? What will I become? So I sit alone, mumbling, seeking for an answer... But I find none. ------------------------------ You are confused? I would say so. I do not deny it. Count me in with your lot. I am Illian Martel, a man who has lost the desire to hope. A shell of my former self. But I must go on, I shall endure. I have no other choice but to die, but death is not as easy a challenge to take. I fear it, I shy away, I run from the final rest. So you have not run I see, have not turned your face from me. Do you desire to know me more? To plumb the depths of my soul? Seek, it is open to you. Listen, you may learn. ------------------------------ I was once a happy child, the village pet it seemed. Smiles, laughter, joy followed my every movement. My family was worthy, worthy of the joy they posessed and radiated as the sun itself. Why were they cursed with me? I killed them, drove them into the grave. It was my sin that did them in, my cursed mark on the world. Damnation is my lot. I remember it as vividly as if it were yesterday. To my mind it was. The scene plays out day in and day out a repeat performance in my tortured dreams. I cannot erase it, though many times have I tried. My terrible curse, to live with their blood on my hands, a vivid painting of my destiny. I had begun to develop a "gift" as mother called it. Life had changed. I could feel the currents of the world in a way many will never know. It was as if I could reach out and touch the very fabric of life, to even control them at times. I grasped and manipulated things, events, situations that most would not think possible. I was enthralled, infatuated with my newfound power. My gift. My cursed gift, I would rather I had never been born. The night was cool, a breeze flowed through my open window carrying the laughter of my sister as she ran about the farm. The smell of roasted lamb filtered through the house, mother's laughter danced about as my father took her in his arms. It was a night any family would envy until my curse brought it all down around us. I killed them, I killed them all. I know not what happened, but it was my doing. Fire leapt from my hands, a dancer of death. It ran to the walls, fell from the heavens, and flew on the wings of the wind. The image of my sister shrivelled and smoldering outside my window, my mother and father broken on the floor will haunt me till I breathe no more. I despise my very breath. Deathbringer, hopebreaker, Cursed soul of the dawn. Take my misery from me. I rained death and destruction upon all who breathed that night. They are as dead as my soul feels. And yet he felt I could be redeemed? That I could find the path to redemption? Where would I go? what would I find? To find myself he said. I laughed, I am lost. Yet he believed, he insisted ... Fine. Where must I begin? ... To the East he said... I will find it when the time is right. His words had best hold true. ----------------------------- For the first time I sat and allowed myself to dream of a life beyond my misery. A light seemingly within grasp, miles away, but burning for the first time. I awoke and rose, leaving behind a shell of a man, reborn. For the first time I hoped... And took my first steps towards my destiny. ----------------------------- (And so begins the first pages of Illian Martel's Journal, "The Tales of The Prodigal".)
Vacerious 07-14-05, 06:03 PM	shouldn't this be in the character development forum?
Eros 07-14-05, 06:17 PM	shouldn't this be in the character development forum? Probably. Is this better? Looks good, I think it gives others much more of an idea of the power you are capable of without giving away the fact you are a sorcerer. Also the rest of the party will learn a great deal about your character upon meeting him in game. Eros
Aladdar 07-14-05, 09:14 PM	Thanks. It's in the other forum as well. I've noticed that I get differing opinions based on the forum it's in so I wanted a well rounded opinion.