| Post/Author/DateTime | Post |
|---|---|
| Reversefigure409-14-06, 07:38 PM | Short Question: Looking for ways to "curse" in DnD terms ("Blood and ashes", that sort of thing), preferably non-religious. Longer Question: I'm the face for a party, playing a character who was raised as a dirt-poor farmer and used to swear a lot. He's since been well-educated and tries to hide his background by being well spoken all the time, but slips back to swearing in times of stress. He's also fairly non-religious (a loose follower of Olidmarra), so curses like "Moradin's Beard!" won't do much good. I'm looking for fantasy style streams of curses he can go off into, along the lines of "Bags" (from the Sword of Truth series), "Blood and bloody ashes", that sort of thing. Thoughts, suggestions? |
| Artector09-14-06, 07:48 PM | "Oxblood!" Stuff in other languages, like Orc, Goblin, Dwarven. "Greshk!" "Cack!" "Gorid!" Make em mean whatever you want. There's probably some constructed languages out there with mroe inventive swear words in those languages. |
| metamind09-14-06, 07:54 PM | Well, The "s-word" was derived from the old English word Schitte. I can't think of anything else at the moment. |
| Torp09-14-06, 08:07 PM | Well, if you don't mind some actual swearing, I would suggest good old British swearing words. You already have bloody there, so that one's covered. Then there's arse. I'm not going to go into details on the rest, as I believe the forum rules won't allow me to do so, but you could probably just do a google search for "british swear words" and get a couple of pages. It might not be very fantasy, though. I don't see why a non-religious character can't use religious swearwords. In fact, such a character would be more free to use such phrases. "By Moradins beard" might be a perfectly acceptable swearphrase for a worshipper of Moradin to use. Add in one of the above words (no, not bloody), and you have something I would never have any of my characters say in front of a dwarf, worshipper of Moradin or not. |
| Lunar_Shadow09-14-06, 09:31 PM | I generrally use draconic, but they aren't tecnically curses. I use potoch alot, I think it means stupid/idiot (Don't have the draconomicon on hand). |
| Kit_the_Odd09-14-06, 09:45 PM | Try putting together several strings of non-cussing curses. Here's a couple of my favorites: Scum-sucking son of a motherless goat-pig. Lousy piece of worm-ridden filth. Also you could try an online insult generator, preferably a "Shakespearian" one. Google it and you'll find plenty. |
| CPAtheFat09-14-06, 10:01 PM | Depending on your character's intelligence, you could go with the Johnny Dangerously style of cursing ... fargging icehole ... bells in a sling ... that sorta thing. Or make up some of your own ... "Aw splint! Shut the frog up you damp bench!" Maybe the character has been ... uh ... cursed ... to always cuss as much as possible, but a certain word or sound comes out instead. "Aw bink! Shut the bink up you bink bink!" Of course, it could be any word or sound, or no sound at all. |
| DarkNick09-14-06, 10:09 PM | Elminsters Arse! Hogs breath! Pizzle Rot!! That's as rare as rocking horse shitte (old rural New Zealand saying for ya) Suck my brown ooz Ogres snot! Cow cakes! Rams balls Well stuff me with metal and call me a rust monster eee's as happy as a rust monster in an armoury Thats like the drow calling the kettle black Tastier than green slime Orcs Blood Go eat a troll! your about as pleasant as a harpy's armpit well ride me with a riding dog dragons poo Beholders brown eye Ettins teeth! Call me a moon elves arse |
| GDarius09-14-06, 11:54 PM | Bob Sagget! |
| DwarvinJedi09-15-06, 12:11 AM | Kit, I like the Star Wars reference. also, I can see a sort of non-religious person using more negative religious curses: "By Grummsh's eye" and the like Make some word up that might have the same denotation as the f-word, and use that |
| The Ubbergeek09-15-06, 12:42 AM | Like the last poster said, but I'd say you should look into Shadowrun - the game is famous for it's slang, and some would do well into common fantasy. Like the famous insult for elves - dandelion eaters! The famous Planescape slang work excellent, too. Cutter, bash, blood, prime, etc... |
| Darkuwa09-15-06, 12:47 AM | oh... kobold spit. |
| Kethka09-15-06, 12:57 AM | You don't frighten us, English pig-dog! Go and boil your bottoms, son of a silly person. I blow my nose on you, so-called Arthur-king, you and your silly English K...kaniggets. I don't want to talk to you, no more, you empty-headed animal, food trough wiper. I fart in your general direction. You mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries. Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time. Ha ha! Hello! Smelly English K...niggets ... and Monsieur Arthur King, who has the brain of a duck, you know. We French persons outwit you a second time, perfidious English mousedropping hoarders ... how you say: "Begorrah!" How you English say: I one more time, mac, I unclog my nose towards you, sons of a window-dresser, so, you think you could out-clever us French fellows with your silly knees-bent creeping about advancing behaviour. I wave my private parts at your aunties, you brightly-coloured, mealy-templed, cranberry-smelling, electric donkey-bottom biters. No chance, English bed-wetting types. We burst our pimples at you, and call your door-opening request a silly thing. You tiny-brained wipers of other people's bottoms! Yes, depart a lot at this time, and cut the approaching any more or we fire arrows into the tops of your heads and make castanets of your ********* already. And now remain gone, illegitimate-faced bugger-folk! And, if you think you got a nasty time this taunting, you ain't heard nothing yet, dappy k...niggets, and A. King Esquire. You couldn't catch clap in a brothel, silly English K...niggets ... :D :D :D |
| Ralvuimego09-15-06, 01:07 AM | I had a person who cursed at people in Infernal. :devil: "And may Fharlanghn's road guide ye streight up yer own arse!" |
| Cryforge09-15-06, 01:43 AM | I like Spanish or German swear words. They roll of the tongue well and sound insulting even if you don't know what they mean. |
| Raymond_Luxury_Yacht09-15-06, 02:41 AM | Considering how old most modern swears are, I'd just use those. Or look up cockney rhyming slang. |
| Lunar_Shadow09-15-06, 09:29 AM | German cuss words do roll of the tounge rather easily. I kinda like Shizakopf (Not sure on the spelling) which meanst S***head |
| HauptSin09-15-06, 10:30 AM | Scheisskopf* Verdammte Scheisse! Schweinhund! Kakschlampe! Blöde Kuh'! (Adjective) Schweine! I'd probably have to censor some of those, were they in English... The direct translations aren't that bad, but the interpretations are. You could always go with Quebec French swear words. Tabarnak! Chrisse! Calvaire! Mon osti de saint-sacrament de câlisse de crisse! Mon crisse de char est ****é [lit. My Christ's car is broken!]! Almost all of them are just words relating to Catholic tradition. |
| Sereno09-15-06, 10:43 AM | German cuss words do roll of the tounge rather easily. I kinda like Shizakopf (Not sure on the spelling) which meanst S***head "Scheisskopf" is what you're looking for, only it's usually spelled with that funny double-S-looks-kinda-like-a-B thingy (I can't remember what it's called). German's also got "schweinhund" (lit.: pig-dog). From "Roy Roy": Ragged-arsed tinkers! Sheep-shaggers, the lot of 'em! |
| Rickiel09-15-06, 11:05 AM | Some personal swear words that I'm rather fond of. Saint's and Proxies! Sod off you sodding sod! Addle-coved no-nothin' prime born in a cess-pit courtesy of a black oozes ministrations! Pike it! Yer mother was a succubus and you're STILL ugly! Do your self a favor and worship Her Serenity. DEMON! (said to a Baatezu) DEVIL! (said to a Tana'ari) You good-for-nought armor clanking pig shanking swill swindeling wench copping black lit air-headed bull blower piece of a tin of slaad spittle of a Prime! (said to a lawful-stupid paladin once) |
| Makuya09-15-06, 01:19 PM | I only have one: Go bother the Lady of Pain! |
| Aliquid09-15-06, 01:58 PM | "Blistering barnacles!" "Billions of blistering barnacles". "Billions of bilious blue blistering barnacles". "Ten Thousand Thundering Typhoons!" Insult to call someone: "Guano gatherer" "Troglodyte" "Lily-livered bandicoot" |
| ArcTan09-15-06, 04:03 PM | Short Question: Looking for ways to "curse" in DnD terms ("Blood and ashes", that sort of thing), preferably non-religious. Longer Question: I'm the face for a party, playing a character who was raised as a dirt-poor farmer and used to swear a lot. He's since been well-educated and tries to hide his background by being well spoken all the time, but slips back to swearing in times of stress. He's also fairly non-religious (a loose follower of Olidmarra), so curses like "Moradin's Beard!" won't do much good. I'm looking for fantasy style streams of curses he can go off into, along the lines of "Bags" (from the Sword of Truth series), "Blood and bloody ashes", that sort of thing. Thoughts, suggestions? I'm biased, here -- as long as your party are all adults who can handle it, I don't see what's wrong with using real-life English curse words. Those words are just as much real English words as the word "tree" or the word "warrior", and I don't see why you have to replace them to get a "fantasy" feel anymore than you have to come up with a fake word for "tree". In reality, after all, they only seem "modern" because history books and fantasy books have traditionally been gone over by the censors so they're appropriate for a family audience. Most curse words are centuries old, and the curses used in *real life* by a 16th-century farmer -- as opposed to the words put into his mouth in a play or in a book of folk tales -- wouldn't actually sound that different, if translated into modern pronunciation, from what we say today. |
| AaronDireBear09-15-06, 04:05 PM | My orcs use Ilka Tuk Tak from Dominic Deegan :) |
| smp4life09-15-06, 06:19 PM | Crom! |
| cmrscorpio09-15-06, 10:33 PM | Bar that, pike it, and sod off, you addle-cove, before I stuff your bonebox full of your own blek. translation: shut up, stick it where the sun don't shine and get lost, you idiot, before I stuff your mouth full of your own feces. Oh how I love planar cant (http://mimir.net/cant/cant2.html). |
| Raven Dark09-16-06, 02:11 AM | "Blistering barnacles!" "Billions of blistering barnacles". "Billions of bilious blue blistering barnacles". "Ten Thousand Thundering Typhoons!" Insult to call someone: "Guano gatherer" "Troglodyte" "Lily-livered bandicoot" Arg noggets! You beat me to it! :mad: Nothing beats Captain Haddock, except for Tintin himself, that is. :D |
| jokei09-16-06, 02:18 AM | Well, the C-word derives from the Anglo-Saxon Quint: which means, well you know a foo foo, or Wizards Sleeve. "Your mother lies with orcs" |
| Bulletproof_Condom09-16-06, 07:51 AM | Sometimes, the best insults can be said with no swears at all. "It will never happen again. I give you my word." "I know a handful of words of the same worth as yours, though I dare not utter them in mixed company." "They say whoever stormed the keep would have to be either incredibly brave or incredibly stupid." "Ah, there it is. Aren't you glad you don't have to be brave?" "Fancy a little dance there, slim?" "M'lady, I'm afraid I'm not half the man you are." But if you're going for simplistic gutterspeak, most real-world curses are drawn from places and things that are unpleasant ("Damn you all to Hell," and such). Find places and things of a similar unpleasant nature in your world and use that. "To the abyss with you!" |
| metamind09-16-06, 10:41 AM | "You fight like an elf!" "Go to the abyss!" "Go cast magic missle up a dragon's arse!" |
| Saberus09-16-06, 05:46 PM | I use "Smeg" the universal swear word from Red Dwarf try learning the Orcish phrase for "Hey, YOU!" if you can put the right inflection into it, it's worse than any insult you can throw at an orc. also try "Kharsade kiso motghra!" It means: (I) f***ed your mom! in Reveilerian. You can even add "Yahemo bera lypozea" (I've had) better from old pillows (can also mean 'mattresses') |
| wackywizjr09-16-06, 10:03 PM | Good frazes with an old feel... That boys as dumb as a mud fence. By the queens twisted knickers! Bull Pizzle! There is a wolf in the doghouse. Drunk as a three eyed skunk in a brothel. Hussey! Peasent! Is that a beard or are you perchance trying to swallow a goat whole? |
| thadastardly109-17-06, 12:43 PM | Try putting words together that aren't swears, that go together well. Say in a tone of voice that one would nomally drop an F bomb. "Fudge Muzzlebunnies!" And this is unrelated, but I gurantee you the only word that isn't intimidating is 'tummy.' Try having a frenzied bezerker say 'I'm gonna ram my sword into your tummy!' and watch him get laughed at. |
| ArcTan09-17-06, 06:48 PM | I use "Smeg" the universal swear word from Red Dwarf Of course, "smeg" is actually a real obscene word. They just said it wasn't to wriggle past the censors. |
| Harrowdroth09-17-06, 06:50 PM | Pike off. Go ram a pike up your (insert word). ***** Filth-blood (to half-orc, or from an elf to a half elf) Half-blood (to any half-whatever) Frakne'sh (orcish) Ilythiir (to an elf, Means drow) Chinggow poyo, I don't know what this means, I think its spanish. Has something to do with a chicken... the last one could be sensored... |
| Torp09-17-06, 07:00 PM | I'm not sure what it means either, but if it's spanish, you've written it as it's pronounced, not as it's supposed to be spelled. Chicken is pollo (I have only very basic knowledge of spanish, from having had a couple of vacations in the country). It is however pronounced more like poyo. |
| Rhjamiz09-17-06, 08:05 PM | My rogue just uses the goold old standby, f***. It is versatile, so he tends to use it several times in a sentence if he gets riled up. Such as when, say, the Cleric ends up taking a swim in a pool full of Kyuss worms (it glowed eerie green, and was called by its technical term, f***water. Coined by my character, obviously). Honestly, f*** covers all the bases. Example!: "Pyremius' sake, you've been f***ing swimming in the f***ing f***water! Get the f*** away. Don't f***ing touch me!" Of course, we're all adults, so if your DM is offended by the word or you have children present, I can understand your search for alternatives. Too bad I know of no other word with such versatility. |
| DarkNick09-17-06, 08:42 PM | Of course, "smeg" is actually a real obscene word. They just said it wasn't to wriggle past the censors. I thought it was short for Smegma - as in "A sebaceous secretion, esp. that found under the prepuce." e.g. p**** cheese. This is why mum always told you boys to wash behind your "ears". With circumcision it probably is not as prevalent and I hear Americans like to have their weiners butchered. |
| Saberus09-19-06, 09:46 PM | :bump: The Killer of Threads strikes again, :sigh: |
| ArcTan09-19-06, 10:14 PM | I thought it was short for Smegma - as in "A sebaceous secretion, esp. that found under the prepuce." e.g. p**** cheese. This is why mum always told you boys to wash behind your "ears". With circumcision it probably is not as prevalent and I hear Americans like to have their weiners butchered. Yeah, exactly -- it's a real word for something nasty, it's just an obscure one, so they were able to get away with using it. |
| Thanqol09-19-06, 10:38 PM | I like "Illuminated Heaven!" "Tower Spit!" "Ftagen!" |
| Thanqol09-19-06, 10:41 PM | Arg noggets! You beat me to it! :mad: Nothing beats Captain Haddock, except for Tintin himself, that is. :D Ectoplasm! |
| Fireclave09-20-06, 12:37 AM | Don't forget the ever-classic "Spoony!" :P |
| Pandaemoni09-20-06, 01:23 AM | Well, The "s-word" was derived from the old English word Schitte. I can't think of anything else at the moment. The Old English was also written "scite" or "scitte" ("sch" is more of a Middle English thing)...but they were all pronounced much like the modern word (basically like "shi' teh" where the "teh" was very short and underpronounced). The "sch" and "sc" combination were both pronounced like the modern "sh". So that particular ancient word is a pretty much unmistakable cognate to the modern one. |
| Xerres_Tervas09-20-06, 02:21 AM | "Should'nt you be fondling yourself about now?" "I saw a donkey walking the street with a limp, guess you got kicked from the brothel again and needed some cheap entertainment." "I'd call you a hog-beast, but even such swine dress better than you." "Stop. Go home, and smack yourself in the face with a stick a few times, then come back when your face is covered in blood. That way I can look at you without vomiting." "Please, for the love of all things holy take off that ugly mask. Wait, it isn't a mask!?! Sweet merciful Lords Of Madness you are hideous!" These work for me. |
| Jackmojo09-20-06, 02:04 PM | Short Question: Looking for ways to "curse" in DnD terms ("Blood and ashes", that sort of thing), preferably non-religious. Longer Question: I'm the face for a party, playing a character who was raised as a dirt-poor farmer and used to swear a lot. He's since been well-educated and tries to hide his background by being well spoken all the time, but slips back to swearing in times of stress. He's also fairly non-religious (a loose follower of Olidmarra), so curses like "Moradin's Beard!" won't do much good. I'm looking for fantasy style streams of curses he can go off into, along the lines of "Bags" (from the Sword of Truth series), "Blood and bloody ashes", that sort of thing. Thoughts, suggestions? Google and Wikipedia provide: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_fictional_expletives#P I personally prefer the oaths from Pirates of Dark Water (nothing like a fantasy cartoon for DnD inspiration) Jack |
| gastropod09-20-06, 02:13 PM | Crickets!!! |
| ArcTan09-20-06, 02:48 PM | Chinggow poyo, I don't know what this means, I think its spanish. Has something to do with a chicken... "Chinga pollo". "Chinga" = "F***", "pollo" = "chicken", so "f*** a chicken". Not the most creative curse but it works. |
| Rickiel09-20-06, 03:22 PM | Oh hilt it! Barmy. Addle-coved fig-eatin' milk creeper! |
| Magus Gar Kan09-20-06, 05:51 PM | My personal favorite tactic is to replace any swear phrase that uses the word "hell" with either "the hells", "the nine hells", or "the nine hells of baator" "What in the nine hells of baator!" :eek: |
| Piggyfreak609-20-06, 07:52 PM | You N'wah! |
| FRRC09-20-06, 07:57 PM | "By Pelor's shiny buttocks, what are you...." "Go kiss a Succubus"" "Go jump in an Ooze!" "Your chest is the perfect scabbard for my dagger" "You've got worse depth perception than Gruumsh" "Thats its! Screams some mores, puny humans! Screaming onlys wants to make me makes you deaders!" "I hear (Enter Race) is quite the delacasy around this time of year." "I've seen pixies taller than you" "Crikey! He's tiny! I've had bigger peices of corn in my crap than him!" "Your music sounds better when you're surrounded by a Silence spell" "You're Ghoul feed!" "Go eat Goblin s**t, you bilgerat!" |
| MistWolf09-22-06, 12:04 AM | One of my personal favorites is from Watership Downs- "Frith on a stick!" I also like to use spoonerisms such as bat rastard, dadgumn, sock cocker or nucking futter. To describe morons, I've used knucklebutt, jerkmiller, dinglefritz, jerkenheimer, turdmiller, Doofus Magee, carpet gargler, hoofenmouther and other such nonsense. The best oaths really are religious based. Frith was the rabbit god in Watership Downs. That's why you such oaths as "Odins' Beard" and some are quite blasphemous. You could say "By Elhonas' brass bra!" or "Boccobs' last blessing" or "Glittergolds' promise". They should also roll off the tongue with a music all their own. That's why when I'm frustrated "Ah, Frith on a stick!" works so well |
| alchemyprime09-22-06, 11:32 PM | As my character, Armos Donscient Silvergold Owskorerf Jebo Roonock Sunmage Glammerhand Goldvoice Sunfist Greenmane Daerpen, said to every enemy he ever ran into after being hit: "Go to Gehenna, you citrus eating son of a Kobold!" |
| Cthulhu312509-23-06, 10:15 AM | Of course, "smeg" is actually a real obscene word. They just said it wasn't to wriggle past the censors. http://www.smeguk.com/Catalogue.htm Hmm... I always liked the one from Planewalker: "Rust you and the Slaad you rode in on!" |
| Rickiel09-23-06, 01:17 PM | Why don't you just take your fancy spell book and go fizzle yourself! |
| Anung_Un_Rama09-23-06, 01:26 PM | I've alway's been a big fan of the word "Cor!" I can't remember where I heard it, but I have heard it in some medieval action flicks or something. I tend to use it when I play my thief. |
| UmbralKnight09-23-06, 01:51 PM | Iblith is a rather standard one. And it can be used in oh so many contexts. I also use; -By Nerull's bony backside! -Cleave! (in place of blast!) -Trollsblood! -Goblin guts! -Hounds of Hades! -Smaug's breath! (in FR) -Fireballs! -Mordenkainen's shiny cranium! One of my players is also fond of telling people to "go grapple themselves". |
| Aliquid09-23-06, 04:21 PM | I've alway's been a big fan of the word "Cor!" I can't remember where I heard it, but I have heard it in some medieval action flicks or something. I tend to use it when I play my thief.Actually, Cor is and old British slang word (still being used today). It's quite a mild term, not really a curse. Closer to something like "Dang". |
| Anung_Un_Rama09-24-06, 01:49 AM | Either way, its a fun word. Like bollocks! :) Both are quite fun to use when playing my rogue. |
| Aliquid09-24-06, 11:37 AM | Either way, its a fun word. Like bollocks! :) Both are quite fun to use when playing my rogue.And Blimey, or even better "Cor Blimey!" :) |