Favorite character stories [Archive] - Wizards Community

Favorite character stories [Archive] - Wizards Community

Post/Author/DateTime Post
Keenath
05-18-07, 01:12 AM So, tell me your favorite character stories! The moments that you remember years later (or your buddies won't let you live down)!

Here's two to get you started.

We were running Return to the Temple of Elemental Evil. I was playing a gnome illusionist, and I managed to have two moments in the same night!

Moment one:
The Moathouse is the first bit of the RttToEE adventure. Outside the moathouse, there's a juvie blue dragon who you have to get past.

Well. We walk in the gate and there he is in front of us, big as life. I roll my massive knowledge check, and the DM says "Here, you know everything in the MM." I look up the page. Aha! Blue dragons live in deserts, and we're thousands of miles from the nearest desert! And me being an illusionist and all, I figure I'm gonna be clever. "It's the wrong kind of dragon!" I say. "They don't live anywhere near here. It's an illusion." So I boldly walk towards it. BOOM! I eat a breath weapon lightning bolt. Toasty! Good thing I had massive HP due to a high constitution score. I *STILL* hear about that from my gaming group.

Moment two:
Inside the moathouse is a deep hole with a pillar (actually an inverted obelisk) in the center. You come out on top of the pillar and have to fight a grell. Well, here I am, a small creature with a cruddy fortitude save. Whap, I'm paralyzed, and a few turns later I'm grappled and carried away. Fortunately my party managed to kill the Grell so I didn't get dragged into the darkness and made into dinner.

Unfortunately, at that point we were hovering in midair, so I plummet, paralyzed, into the abyss below!

Fortunately, I only had one turn of paralysis left when he dropped me, and it was a REALLY deep hole -- over 300 feet! The DM was nice enough to rule that I fell for an entire turn without hittin anything. So I unparalyze in midair -- I'm on my feet and walking around the table at this point -- and immediately shout, "FEATHERFALL!!"

My gnome illusionist makes a perfect landing, and happily waits for the rest of those slowpokes to get down there.

Edit: As a minor postscript, I should mention this. I think that event somewhat traumatized my poor gnome; for the rest of his career he spent a 2nd level slot every day on a Silent Featherfall (he already had Silent Spell to improve his ability to use illusions without announcing their presence). With that slot, no matter what, as long as he could think, he could save himself from a long fall -- cast as an immediate, purely mental action!

One more story.

It was my first time DMing. I was running the Sunless Citadel for my friends. One of them had a barbarian who he insisted on naming "Bob". We managed to rechristen him the only marginally more acceptable, "Skull", but that's beside the point. "Bob"'s player had several annoying habits, but I was getting really irritated about every (and I mean EVERY) opening of a new room announced by, "I kick in the door! Boom!"

Finally, at one point, they were facing a stone door. Now, they didn't know it, but this door opened into a closet-sized space with a water tank in it. "Bob" announced for the fifteenth time, "I kick in the door! Boom!" And I made an executive decision. "It doesn't budge."

Well, long story short, there was no keyhole, so he started hacking the stone door with his axe. Finally, trying not to laugh, I called for wisdom checks. He failed, but one of the other players didn't -- and I announced, "You notice that the hinges are on the OUTSIDE of the door." She walked over, pulled on the door, and it came right open! I wouldn't have done that, except that he EXPLICITLY said he was going to KICK the door open, and it was a tiny little room on the other side....

On the downside, from that point on, ever few doors he'd demand to know where the hinges were.... And THEN kick it in, boom.
goawayugh
05-18-07, 01:18 PM I still pick on my wife about this one.

It was just my wife (a sorc) and me (a rogue) as PC's. This is my second time ever playing (it was several years ago). We were in a pitch black cave, trying to figure out how to see and navigate around. Suddenly I remember that she had a wand of daylight. It still had 40+ charges on it. "No. I don't want to waste it, we might need it later." What?!?
Nat_20
05-18-07, 02:53 PM Location: Wolds Largest Dungeon

Party: Me, Human Fighter, Others were two Elan Psions, a Drow Rogue and a Half-Orc Cleric...

What happened was we walked into a large room with floating balls of light everywhere, then the doors locked, the balls were collecting to the center of the room, forming some sort of portal, all the while we were buffing ourselves with everything we could think of... Then it stepped forth, a Fiendish T-Rex...

It was a mighty battle, our cleric got eaten right when we started, i was the second to fall, then one of the elans, but after a couple of lucky rolls and over channeling like crazy, the beast fell, right on to the Rogue, he was pinned under the body of a giant lizard.

Well the Psion and the rogue both found a strange portal and got out of that damned place... but that was a fun run at it though.
ArcanaKnight
05-19-07, 02:03 AM Part 1: Me (LE Fighter/Ranger) and my buddy (NG Druid/Ranger) had been sucked into Ravenloft. We came upon a warehouse and nobody was around, so we searched and didn't find anything except for this locked chest that I wasn't able to open, so I was going to just take it and stick in our cart and find someone to open it later. My friend objected to that since it was probably someone else's property. We started fighting about this, but since our life totals were linked he couldn't really hurt me. What he the Druid did do though was hold a knife to my horse's throat until I put it back. After he went to sleep I put the chest in the cart anyway.

Part 2: We were traveling across a bridge and were stopped by a troll which demanded a toll to cross. We didn't have much money on us at the time, so I just gave him the chest and asked if that was enough. He ripped off the top of the chest and I immediately decapitated him (20-20-dead). At least I didn't have to wait long to find someone to open it:D

Edit: The chest had a couple thousand gp in various denominations.
Riplox
05-19-07, 07:58 AM Before I get to the story... ArcanaKnight, what was in the chest? Don't make a new post, just edit the current one.

Story:
This was at the end of my first adventure in D&D (all level 1s) after we managed to escape a mob of over 500 orcs, whose encampment we had stumbled upon. It's been years, so I can't remember all who was in the group. I just remember that there were two rogues in the party. Me, a goblin, and the DM's girlfriend, a kender rogue ('nuff said).

Anyway. We get back to the inn we're staying at and find there are more people occupying more rooms and the kender goes to look through their stuff, even if she has to force her way in (I don't know why none of us tried to stop her). She gets to one room and there is someone actually in the bed while she rifles through his stuff. Needless to say, he wakes up and is obviously POed. A battle ensues with the guy fighting ALL of us at once. I get punched in the face and reel backward out the window and fall two stories, which is enough to knock me out.

So here I am, laying in the street behind an inn, unconscious, all while the rest of the party fights this guy. A few rounds later, they finally figure out that he can't be beaten and try to escape. One of our characters has a HUGE bag of rations on him and decides to toss it out the window. This bag, weighing more than my character does, land on him, and finishes him off.

Other than having my character go from creation to death in ONE session, I had fun that night.
Apparit
05-19-07, 08:12 AM I hate Lankmar. This is what happened a few weeks ago.

So we're out in the marsh for this mission our patron has given us. One of the least likely rolls is Marsh Panthers, which are an endangered species, and though the sale of their pelts is illegal, they're worth 2000 rilks a piece. 2000 RILKS. So we kill 3, but our patron is hurrying us, so we hide them in the bushes and move on.

Coming back we meet our Patron's bodyguard who has skinned the panthers and gives us the extremely expensive pelts! We were overjoyed. But unfortunately a little escapade earlier in the day makes us unable to come back through the Marsh Gate, so instead the only option is to go through the rat-invested sewers :( Not normal rats mind, Man Rats, that speak and fight with weapons.

We unfortunately meet one of them who demands we pay tribute to the Rat Lord to be allowed passage through his domain. We're reluctant, but it's the only option. We give him one of the pelts, making sure that we show we only have one. He seems moderately pleased :mad: And gives a little riddle which we pass with ease, so we're allowed passage.

So we get to our patron's house, but we need leave during the night, and seperately so not to arouse suspicion. Unfortunately our annoying Eastern Noble Nob had an argument with our Kleshite Amazon Cob as to who would carry the pelts. So now Nob carries one pelt, and Cob carries the other. Idiot Nob.

On Nob's way back, he meets his EXTREMELY crooked noble friend Snaarve, and has a chat with him, only for him to pulled off by the arm by a Lady Esma, or something. Nob thinks nothing of it, and starts making his way back to the tenament again. Except as he makes a right into ***** Street, two Northeners bar his way.

"This way's closed."

He rolls perception. 97. :P DM says they seem a bit drunk, Nob is stupid, and decides to think that after making a perception roll of 97 he should take what he's told as the gospel truth and gets all confident about being able to fight a couple of drunk Northeners.

"You don't want to do this."

He replies. They don't budge. So he draws his weapons. They draw theirs. They're not drunk anymore. He puts up a pretty good fight against them before being forced to flee. So one of them grabs his pack as he runs and searches through it. Finds the pelt and says:

"We've got what she wants."

????????? All of us are now like WTF. He chases one down and kills him, unfortunately not the one with the pelt. What he doesn't know is that Job, our theif friend has watched this fight unfold, and makes a shortcut to cut off the one that has the pelt, and blowguns him. He takes the pelt back. But because he's evil and a greedy SOB, he keeps the 2k gold for himself.

We have no idea who hired those Northeners to this day. But if Nob hadn't taken one of the pelts off Cob, this would never of happened. Nob is a giant idiot.
Bacdednosm
05-24-07, 04:11 PM My friend, who has been playing DnD for years, told me a story that makes me laugh every time I think of it. This is how it goes.

My friend's party is resting at the local tavern. The party's rogue decides to go see if he can find any rumors about treasure and adventure in the region. Long story short, eventually this half orc comes in the bar and starts to cause trouble. The Paladin in the group walks over to him and asks him to calm down. The orc replies with a string of vulgar insults to the party and the paladin, not wanting to cause trouble cause hes all good and stuff, walks away. In retaliation, the mage, played by my friend, uses prestidigitation and turns the half-orc's foaming cup of ale into a nice cup of luke warm kobold urine. Supposedly, because the DM thought this was so ridiculously funny, and he actually made the wizard make a save to resist laughing. He rolled a 1, and his character bursts out laughing as the half- orc spits out his drink in disgust. At this point the bar goes silent. Upon seeing the wizard laughing, the half-orc goes nuts, draws his weapon and rushes at my friend's wizard. My friend, for some reason had a disintegrate spell quickened, so seeing the obvious threat to himself, imediately casts it on the unfortunate half-orc, who upon failing his save, is turned into a little pile of dust on the floor. After this, the wizard sits down, and the bar goes back to normal as if nothing had happened.

Oh, and here is the link to probably the best D and D story ever, though many of you have already heard of it.

http://users.tkk.fi/~vesanto/link.fun/stupid.pcs.html
windscar18
05-24-07, 04:43 PM Hmmm...

Well, there was always the rhino missile : P.

One time, when I was a new DM, I had the party sitting in a tavern. They then got attacked by these really powerful NPCs. Of course, since I was new, the concept of fudging dice was unknown to me, so these guys just rolled critical...after critical...after critical.

So, the party starts running all over the tavern, trying to now get themselves not killed when the druid in the party gets an idea. He wildshapes into a bird, flies out the window, and then gets REALLY high. He then dive bombs the tavern, but turns into a rhino in mid flight and miraculously manages to kill both the NPCs AND his own party members, and dies in the process. The lone survivor, who was sitting outside the tavern, steals all the gear and then just buys ressurections.

Did I mention I was new and did not know about the wild shape restriction on HD?
Argo
05-24-07, 08:03 PM This is a little long... but it's my favorite D&D moment. And also my first.

First game. First session.
I was playing Argolon "Argo" Flivverswitch, Halfling Rogue.
My friend was playing Boden Greystrider, Half-Elf Ranger.
We were just doing a session to get a hang of the rules and establish our characters and such before we were joined by other people. So, long story short, we were hired to do a job for the local Thieves' Guild and knock over a Fletcher's shop. We were doing the job, and I snuck into the Fletcher's bedroom where he was asleep in bed with his wife. Above his bed, I could see a nice-looking, ornate longbow. So, I get the NPC "Guide" from the Thieves' Guild (another Halfling) to give me a boost so I can get the bow. He boosts me up, I fail my Jump check, and fall right on top of the sleeping Fletcher. He grapples me and draws a dagger from under his pillow. His wife wakes up and starts screaming, he's shouting questions. The other Halfling is gone--I don't know where.
Boden, the Ranger, is still downstairs looting the various arrows. He hears the commotion, and starts heading up the stairs. He gets to the top of the stairs just in time for the fletcher's son to run past him. He nocks an arrow, and tells him to freeze.
He marches him in to the bedroom.
"Put that knife on the floor or I kill your son." Rolls a 24 Intimidate (16 die, +2 Cha, +4 ranks, +2 situational)
He drops the knife.
As soon as the knife leaves my throat, I roll a nat 20 on my Jump check and snag the bow. I start walking to the door, thinking about how at least I got the bow, when the other Halfling rolls out of the closet and hucks a dagger at the Fletcher, killing him. He runs up, jumps to the bed, collects his dagger and dives out the window.
We bolt from the house as well, trying to take back pathways to stay off the street. We find a huge wall and, realizing we're lost, I decide to Climb it to get our bearings. I throw up my grappling hook and begin to scale the wall.
It takes me a few Climb checks to reach the top, I forget how many.
Five feet from the top, I have to roll a final check.
Natural one.
I plummet off the wall.
Falling damage brings me to -9 HP.
Lucky for me, the Ranger's WIS mod was enough for him to succeed to stabilize me on the first try.
Then he scoops me up and runs to find a Healer.
Here comes the nice bit.
He doesn't know the way to the temple. And he can't tell people why he needs to find it, or we'll get arrested. So he decides to lie. But he doesn't really commit to it. So he runs out to this group of people yelling:
"Help! Help! I need to find the temple! ...My friend got... kicked... by a ... horse."
Pyro_Azer
05-24-07, 09:20 PM My character had earlier killed a bunch of people and took a severed arm as a trophy.

So anyway after getting a nights sleep one character slept in.

DM: so do you guys want to wake him up?

Me: yes to wake him up i will stick the severed arm in his mouth

DM::uh-huh:
Empirate
05-25-07, 08:35 AM I absolutely loved the following one:

DM me, three players. PCs in a mountain valley, villagers not at all friendly, but the PCs' horses need new horseshoes. They leave the horses with the blacksmith, take a room in the tavern. One of the PCs makes a pass at the innkeeper's wife, and, surprisingly, she's not unwilling. The two run off to the forest for a night of romance, while the other two PCs sleep. Next morning the adultery is discovered, these two PCs have a hard time and decide to leave... only they can't find the third (who overslept in the forest). They search all over for him, while the villagers hold a counsel on how to get rid of these powerful personae non gratae. They agree to hide the PCs' horses at a farm a good hour away, and do so. In the meantime, the PCs have come together again (sleepyhead finally joining them). They want their horses, because they want to leave. One of them goes over to the blacksmith.

"Where are our horses?!"
"We took them away, so you..."
"WHAT? How dare you?!"
"We just wanted you to..."
"HOW DARE YOU TAKE AWAY NIGHTBREEZE, MY GOOD COMPANION OF MANY TRAVELS??!!! I SHALL PUNISH YOU REAL BADLY FOR THIS INSULT!!!"
"But we only..."

The PC, all worked up, won't listen, but he also hesitates to strike an unarmed person. So, he just takes his toolbox.

"See what I'm doing? I'm teaching you a lesson! I'm teaching you not to take away peoples OWN PROPERTY! See what that is like, if somebody takes what's yours? See what it's like?"

With that, he dumped the toolbox into the village well. he doesn't tell his companions about this, as he doesn't want to brag with how cleverly he dispensed justice, being a humble guy and all.
A few hours later, the PCs have found their horses. These still need new shoes before they can be ridden. Different PC goes to the blacksmith.

"OK, we've had enough of this stinking hamlet. We're outta here! And guess what: We've got our horses back! Now you're gonna shoe them, and I'll be standing here and watching you. No funny stuff!"
"I'm not going to shoe your horses, sir."
"You're what?"
"I said I'm not gonna shoe your horses, sir."
"Yes you are!"
"No, sir. I'm sorry, sir."
"You'll shoe our horses or you'll wish you'd never crossed my path, man!!"
"I can't, sir... your brother has thrown my tools into the well..."

The best thing was that I had split the group into two rooms, and the other two really didn't know about the toolbox!

:rofl:

Post/Author/DateTime	Post
Keenath 05-18-07, 01:12 AM	So, tell me your favorite character stories! The moments that you remember years later (or your buddies won't let you live down)! Here's two to get you started. We were running Return to the Temple of Elemental Evil. I was playing a gnome illusionist, and I managed to have two moments in the same night! Moment one: The Moathouse is the first bit of the RttToEE adventure. Outside the moathouse, there's a juvie blue dragon who you have to get past. Well. We walk in the gate and there he is in front of us, big as life. I roll my massive knowledge check, and the DM says "Here, you know everything in the MM." I look up the page. Aha! Blue dragons live in deserts, and we're thousands of miles from the nearest desert! And me being an illusionist and all, I figure I'm gonna be clever. "It's the wrong kind of dragon!" I say. "They don't live anywhere near here. It's an illusion." So I boldly walk towards it. BOOM! I eat a breath weapon lightning bolt. Toasty! Good thing I had massive HP due to a high constitution score. I STILL hear about that from my gaming group. Moment two: Inside the moathouse is a deep hole with a pillar (actually an inverted obelisk) in the center. You come out on top of the pillar and have to fight a grell. Well, here I am, a small creature with a cruddy fortitude save. Whap, I'm paralyzed, and a few turns later I'm grappled and carried away. Fortunately my party managed to kill the Grell so I didn't get dragged into the darkness and made into dinner. Unfortunately, at that point we were hovering in midair, so I plummet, paralyzed, into the abyss below! Fortunately, I only had one turn of paralysis left when he dropped me, and it was a REALLY deep hole -- over 300 feet! The DM was nice enough to rule that I fell for an entire turn without hittin anything. So I unparalyze in midair -- I'm on my feet and walking around the table at this point -- and immediately shout, "FEATHERFALL!!" My gnome illusionist makes a perfect landing, and happily waits for the rest of those slowpokes to get down there. Edit: As a minor postscript, I should mention this. I think that event somewhat traumatized my poor gnome; for the rest of his career he spent a 2nd level slot every day on a Silent Featherfall (he already had Silent Spell to improve his ability to use illusions without announcing their presence). With that slot, no matter what, as long as he could think, he could save himself from a long fall -- cast as an immediate, purely mental action! One more story. It was my first time DMing. I was running the Sunless Citadel for my friends. One of them had a barbarian who he insisted on naming "Bob". We managed to rechristen him the only marginally more acceptable, "Skull", but that's beside the point. "Bob"'s player had several annoying habits, but I was getting really irritated about every (and I mean EVERY) opening of a new room announced by, "I kick in the door! Boom!" Finally, at one point, they were facing a stone door. Now, they didn't know it, but this door opened into a closet-sized space with a water tank in it. "Bob" announced for the fifteenth time, "I kick in the door! Boom!" And I made an executive decision. "It doesn't budge." Well, long story short, there was no keyhole, so he started hacking the stone door with his axe. Finally, trying not to laugh, I called for wisdom checks. He failed, but one of the other players didn't -- and I announced, "You notice that the hinges are on the OUTSIDE of the door." She walked over, pulled on the door, and it came right open! I wouldn't have done that, except that he EXPLICITLY said he was going to KICK the door open, and it was a tiny little room on the other side.... On the downside, from that point on, ever few doors he'd demand to know where the hinges were.... And THEN kick it in, boom.
goawayugh 05-18-07, 01:18 PM	I still pick on my wife about this one. It was just my wife (a sorc) and me (a rogue) as PC's. This is my second time ever playing (it was several years ago). We were in a pitch black cave, trying to figure out how to see and navigate around. Suddenly I remember that she had a wand of daylight. It still had 40+ charges on it. "No. I don't want to waste it, we might need it later." What?!?
Nat_20 05-18-07, 02:53 PM	Location: Wolds Largest Dungeon Party: Me, Human Fighter, Others were two Elan Psions, a Drow Rogue and a Half-Orc Cleric... What happened was we walked into a large room with floating balls of light everywhere, then the doors locked, the balls were collecting to the center of the room, forming some sort of portal, all the while we were buffing ourselves with everything we could think of... Then it stepped forth, a Fiendish T-Rex... It was a mighty battle, our cleric got eaten right when we started, i was the second to fall, then one of the elans, but after a couple of lucky rolls and over channeling like crazy, the beast fell, right on to the Rogue, he was pinned under the body of a giant lizard. Well the Psion and the rogue both found a strange portal and got out of that damned place... but that was a fun run at it though.
ArcanaKnight 05-19-07, 02:03 AM	Part 1: Me (LE Fighter/Ranger) and my buddy (NG Druid/Ranger) had been sucked into Ravenloft. We came upon a warehouse and nobody was around, so we searched and didn't find anything except for this locked chest that I wasn't able to open, so I was going to just take it and stick in our cart and find someone to open it later. My friend objected to that since it was probably someone else's property. We started fighting about this, but since our life totals were linked he couldn't really hurt me. What he the Druid did do though was hold a knife to my horse's throat until I put it back. After he went to sleep I put the chest in the cart anyway. Part 2: We were traveling across a bridge and were stopped by a troll which demanded a toll to cross. We didn't have much money on us at the time, so I just gave him the chest and asked if that was enough. He ripped off the top of the chest and I immediately decapitated him (20-20-dead). At least I didn't have to wait long to find someone to open it:D Edit: The chest had a couple thousand gp in various denominations.
Riplox 05-19-07, 07:58 AM	Before I get to the story... ArcanaKnight, what was in the chest? Don't make a new post, just edit the current one. Story: This was at the end of my first adventure in D&D (all level 1s) after we managed to escape a mob of over 500 orcs, whose encampment we had stumbled upon. It's been years, so I can't remember all who was in the group. I just remember that there were two rogues in the party. Me, a goblin, and the DM's girlfriend, a kender rogue ('nuff said). Anyway. We get back to the inn we're staying at and find there are more people occupying more rooms and the kender goes to look through their stuff, even if she has to force her way in (I don't know why none of us tried to stop her). She gets to one room and there is someone actually in the bed while she rifles through his stuff. Needless to say, he wakes up and is obviously POed. A battle ensues with the guy fighting ALL of us at once. I get punched in the face and reel backward out the window and fall two stories, which is enough to knock me out. So here I am, laying in the street behind an inn, unconscious, all while the rest of the party fights this guy. A few rounds later, they finally figure out that he can't be beaten and try to escape. One of our characters has a HUGE bag of rations on him and decides to toss it out the window. This bag, weighing more than my character does, land on him, and finishes him off. Other than having my character go from creation to death in ONE session, I had fun that night.
Apparit 05-19-07, 08:12 AM	I hate Lankmar. This is what happened a few weeks ago. So we're out in the marsh for this mission our patron has given us. One of the least likely rolls is Marsh Panthers, which are an endangered species, and though the sale of their pelts is illegal, they're worth 2000 rilks a piece. 2000 RILKS. So we kill 3, but our patron is hurrying us, so we hide them in the bushes and move on. Coming back we meet our Patron's bodyguard who has skinned the panthers and gives us the extremely expensive pelts! We were overjoyed. But unfortunately a little escapade earlier in the day makes us unable to come back through the Marsh Gate, so instead the only option is to go through the rat-invested sewers :( Not normal rats mind, Man Rats, that speak and fight with weapons. We unfortunately meet one of them who demands we pay tribute to the Rat Lord to be allowed passage through his domain. We're reluctant, but it's the only option. We give him one of the pelts, making sure that we show we only have one. He seems moderately pleased :mad: And gives a little riddle which we pass with ease, so we're allowed passage. So we get to our patron's house, but we need leave during the night, and seperately so not to arouse suspicion. Unfortunately our annoying Eastern Noble Nob had an argument with our Kleshite Amazon Cob as to who would carry the pelts. So now Nob carries one pelt, and Cob carries the other. Idiot Nob. On Nob's way back, he meets his EXTREMELY crooked noble friend Snaarve, and has a chat with him, only for him to pulled off by the arm by a Lady Esma, or something. Nob thinks nothing of it, and starts making his way back to the tenament again. Except as he makes a right into ***** Street, two Northeners bar his way. "This way's closed." He rolls perception. 97. :P DM says they seem a bit drunk, Nob is stupid, and decides to think that after making a perception roll of 97 he should take what he's told as the gospel truth and gets all confident about being able to fight a couple of drunk Northeners. "You don't want to do this." He replies. They don't budge. So he draws his weapons. They draw theirs. They're not drunk anymore. He puts up a pretty good fight against them before being forced to flee. So one of them grabs his pack as he runs and searches through it. Finds the pelt and says: "We've got what she wants." ????????? All of us are now like WTF. He chases one down and kills him, unfortunately not the one with the pelt. What he doesn't know is that Job, our theif friend has watched this fight unfold, and makes a shortcut to cut off the one that has the pelt, and blowguns him. He takes the pelt back. But because he's evil and a greedy SOB, he keeps the 2k gold for himself. We have no idea who hired those Northeners to this day. But if Nob hadn't taken one of the pelts off Cob, this would never of happened. Nob is a giant idiot.
Bacdednosm 05-24-07, 04:11 PM	My friend, who has been playing DnD for years, told me a story that makes me laugh every time I think of it. This is how it goes. My friend's party is resting at the local tavern. The party's rogue decides to go see if he can find any rumors about treasure and adventure in the region. Long story short, eventually this half orc comes in the bar and starts to cause trouble. The Paladin in the group walks over to him and asks him to calm down. The orc replies with a string of vulgar insults to the party and the paladin, not wanting to cause trouble cause hes all good and stuff, walks away. In retaliation, the mage, played by my friend, uses prestidigitation and turns the half-orc's foaming cup of ale into a nice cup of luke warm kobold urine. Supposedly, because the DM thought this was so ridiculously funny, and he actually made the wizard make a save to resist laughing. He rolled a 1, and his character bursts out laughing as the half- orc spits out his drink in disgust. At this point the bar goes silent. Upon seeing the wizard laughing, the half-orc goes nuts, draws his weapon and rushes at my friend's wizard. My friend, for some reason had a disintegrate spell quickened, so seeing the obvious threat to himself, imediately casts it on the unfortunate half-orc, who upon failing his save, is turned into a little pile of dust on the floor. After this, the wizard sits down, and the bar goes back to normal as if nothing had happened. Oh, and here is the link to probably the best D and D story ever, though many of you have already heard of it. http://users.tkk.fi/~vesanto/link.fun/stupid.pcs.html
windscar18 05-24-07, 04:43 PM	Hmmm... Well, there was always the rhino missile : P. One time, when I was a new DM, I had the party sitting in a tavern. They then got attacked by these really powerful NPCs. Of course, since I was new, the concept of fudging dice was unknown to me, so these guys just rolled critical...after critical...after critical. So, the party starts running all over the tavern, trying to now get themselves not killed when the druid in the party gets an idea. He wildshapes into a bird, flies out the window, and then gets REALLY high. He then dive bombs the tavern, but turns into a rhino in mid flight and miraculously manages to kill both the NPCs AND his own party members, and dies in the process. The lone survivor, who was sitting outside the tavern, steals all the gear and then just buys ressurections. Did I mention I was new and did not know about the wild shape restriction on HD?
Argo 05-24-07, 08:03 PM	This is a little long... but it's my favorite D&D moment. And also my first. First game. First session. I was playing Argolon "Argo" Flivverswitch, Halfling Rogue. My friend was playing Boden Greystrider, Half-Elf Ranger. We were just doing a session to get a hang of the rules and establish our characters and such before we were joined by other people. So, long story short, we were hired to do a job for the local Thieves' Guild and knock over a Fletcher's shop. We were doing the job, and I snuck into the Fletcher's bedroom where he was asleep in bed with his wife. Above his bed, I could see a nice-looking, ornate longbow. So, I get the NPC "Guide" from the Thieves' Guild (another Halfling) to give me a boost so I can get the bow. He boosts me up, I fail my Jump check, and fall right on top of the sleeping Fletcher. He grapples me and draws a dagger from under his pillow. His wife wakes up and starts screaming, he's shouting questions. The other Halfling is gone--I don't know where. Boden, the Ranger, is still downstairs looting the various arrows. He hears the commotion, and starts heading up the stairs. He gets to the top of the stairs just in time for the fletcher's son to run past him. He nocks an arrow, and tells him to freeze. He marches him in to the bedroom. "Put that knife on the floor or I kill your son." Rolls a 24 Intimidate (16 die, +2 Cha, +4 ranks, +2 situational) He drops the knife. As soon as the knife leaves my throat, I roll a nat 20 on my Jump check and snag the bow. I start walking to the door, thinking about how at least I got the bow, when the other Halfling rolls out of the closet and hucks a dagger at the Fletcher, killing him. He runs up, jumps to the bed, collects his dagger and dives out the window. We bolt from the house as well, trying to take back pathways to stay off the street. We find a huge wall and, realizing we're lost, I decide to Climb it to get our bearings. I throw up my grappling hook and begin to scale the wall. It takes me a few Climb checks to reach the top, I forget how many. Five feet from the top, I have to roll a final check. Natural one. I plummet off the wall. Falling damage brings me to -9 HP. Lucky for me, the Ranger's WIS mod was enough for him to succeed to stabilize me on the first try. Then he scoops me up and runs to find a Healer. Here comes the nice bit. He doesn't know the way to the temple. And he can't tell people why he needs to find it, or we'll get arrested. So he decides to lie. But he doesn't really commit to it. So he runs out to this group of people yelling: "Help! Help! I need to find the temple! ...My friend got... kicked... by a ... horse."
Pyro_Azer 05-24-07, 09:20 PM	My character had earlier killed a bunch of people and took a severed arm as a trophy. So anyway after getting a nights sleep one character slept in. DM: so do you guys want to wake him up? Me: yes to wake him up i will stick the severed arm in his mouth DM::uh-huh:
Empirate 05-25-07, 08:35 AM	I absolutely loved the following one: DM me, three players. PCs in a mountain valley, villagers not at all friendly, but the PCs' horses need new horseshoes. They leave the horses with the blacksmith, take a room in the tavern. One of the PCs makes a pass at the innkeeper's wife, and, surprisingly, she's not unwilling. The two run off to the forest for a night of romance, while the other two PCs sleep. Next morning the adultery is discovered, these two PCs have a hard time and decide to leave... only they can't find the third (who overslept in the forest). They search all over for him, while the villagers hold a counsel on how to get rid of these powerful personae non gratae. They agree to hide the PCs' horses at a farm a good hour away, and do so. In the meantime, the PCs have come together again (sleepyhead finally joining them). They want their horses, because they want to leave. One of them goes over to the blacksmith. "Where are our horses?!" "We took them away, so you..." "WHAT? How dare you?!" "We just wanted you to..." "HOW DARE YOU TAKE AWAY NIGHTBREEZE, MY GOOD COMPANION OF MANY TRAVELS??!!! I SHALL PUNISH YOU REAL BADLY FOR THIS INSULT!!!" "But we only..." The PC, all worked up, won't listen, but he also hesitates to strike an unarmed person. So, he just takes his toolbox. "See what I'm doing? I'm teaching you a lesson! I'm teaching you not to take away peoples OWN PROPERTY! See what that is like, if somebody takes what's yours? See what it's like?" With that, he dumped the toolbox into the village well. he doesn't tell his companions about this, as he doesn't want to brag with how cleverly he dispensed justice, being a humble guy and all. A few hours later, the PCs have found their horses. These still need new shoes before they can be ridden. Different PC goes to the blacksmith. "OK, we've had enough of this stinking hamlet. We're outta here! And guess what: We've got our horses back! Now you're gonna shoe them, and I'll be standing here and watching you. No funny stuff!" "I'm not going to shoe your horses, sir." "You're what?" "I said I'm not gonna shoe your horses, sir." "Yes you are!" "No, sir. I'm sorry, sir." "You'll shoe our horses or you'll wish you'd never crossed my path, man!!" "I can't, sir... your brother has thrown my tools into the well..." The best thing was that I had split the group into two rooms, and the other two really didn't know about the toolbox! :rofl: