Post/Author/DateTime	Post
Zherog 02-12-07, 07:00 PM	Welcome to the Hero Craftsmen 7 contest, where you make a character and get it voted on according to all its facets by our judges, to see who can make the best character! This time, our chosen theme is sidekicks. Batman had Robin. Abbott had Costello. Shaggy had Scooby (or is it the other way 'round?). The month of February brings us Valentine's Day - the day to show your love. For this contest, we're going to show our love for those sidekicks our PCs sometimes take for granted. Your character for this contest will have some sort of "sidekick" and will gain that sidekick through the rules. What the sidekick is is entirely up to you, as long as it's within the rules. Remember to show your sidekick the love. :love: The required level for this competition is 12th level, which gives each character 88,000gp to spend on magic items and equipment, with no more than 29,333gp to be spent on any one item. Make sure to check The Rules for any rules changes, including the allowed sources for this competition. Contest Rules The following are rules for the Hero Craftsmen competition, and are subject to change at any time between competition periods. Do note that the Code of Conduct is in effect for all aspects of this contest, and those who break it will be disqualified, and their post will be reported. 1) All entries must be submitted with a complete stat block of any format or length, (so long as the stat block is complete, including content like equipment, skills, special abilities etc.) accompanied by a character background also of any format or length. 2) All entries must be submitted by the date and time given by the Coordinating Judge; any entries submitted late will not be judged but they are still allowed to be commented on by other users/judges, and may provide a valuable resource to other players out there. The time given for any competition is likely to be within 2-3 weeks; the exact times and dates will be stated by the Coordinating Judge during the contest's start. 3) After submitting an entry, a 15-minute grace period is allowed to edit your work, in the case of mechanical or formatting errors, typos, and the like. Editing your work after 15 minutes is considered breaking the rules. Hence, we urge you to revise your entry throughly prior to submitting it, to save hassle. Making use of the preview button in the post window will help you catch most errors before posting. 4) One Entry Per Contestant, and that creator must be the submitter (meaning that all work has to be original, and not stolen from someone else.) Also, do not post an entry if you do not want it to be officially judged. 5) At the start of each competition, the coordinating judge will state a single theme around which to base your entry. There are no restrictions based on the character theme itself; it is merely a suggested guideline, but following it in a creative and interesting way will give merit to your entry. 6) There are other restrictions, however. Material in the three core books is allowed. Any material found in the following books is also permitted: Complete Adventurer, Complete Arcane, Complete Divine, Complete Warrior, Expanded Psionics Handbook, and Player's Handbook II. The use of Psionics, Item Creation rules, Epic Characters, and anything else in the Official SRD (http://www.wizards.com/default.asp?x=d20/article/srd35) is permitted. For this specific contest, no other material may be used, including any variant rules in Unearthed Arcana. 7) Additionally, the character must be created with the recommended character wealth as discussed in the DMG (note that you may not spend more than 1/3 of your entry's total wealth on any one item), with average hit points per hit die (eg-2.5hp for d4, 3.5hp for d6, 4.5hp for d8, 5.5hp for d10, 6.5hp for d12; Max hit points at 1st level), using the 28 point-buy system, as discussed in the DMG pg169. For those who do not have access to the DMG, the following sample arrays of scores have been set up for your convenience: 18, 14, 12, 10, 8, 8 15, 14, 13, 12, 11, 10 8) One special rule regarding Crafting: When (and only when) crafting a magic item for your character, the gp cost is 75% of the market price of the item (instead of 50%), and the xp cost is 0, for purposes of this contest. This is to represent that your character may have bought an item prior to crafting it, and the experience that he spent evens out to the required level for the competition. 9) Judges reserve the right to disqualify entries that do not follow the above rules, as they see fit. Scoring Points will be awarded for how well the judges think the character is made and expanded on. Entries from each of the judges will be added up to give a final score. The highest-scoring entry will win gold, second-highest silver, third-highest bronze. The judges may also give a single entry each one bonus point for whatever reason; this bonus point is merely to make out an 'honorable mention' of the competition, and is not likely to make an impact on the results themselves. The judges are expected to be very stingy about their bonus point, meaning that it is possible for no entries to get one in a competition. Special awards will be given to the entry that performs the best in each of the four categories (detailed below), determined by a majority nomination among the judges and/or the highest average score in that category. These awards will have no effect on the total score of each entry. Additionally, the judges reserve the right to post comments on entries, and any contestant may ask to have their scoring (and/or comments) sent to them via PM. Each entry will be scored according to four categories: Thematic Creativity (10 points), Background Content (10 marks), Rules Use (10 points), and Clarity (5 points), for a total of 35 points. -Thematic Creativity is a measure of how well the entry fits with the theme of the contest, decided by the coordinating judge at the start of the competition. It is also a measure of how creative the entry is when fitting in with the theme, meaning that taking the most obvious class for the theme may or may not be the best idea. -Background Content measures how well-written the background of the entry is, and how creative it is. Including plot points, events that shaped your character, and so on, will earn you high points here. -Rules Use is based on how well your character is made mechanically, as well as for how well your entry follows the RAW. Is his attack bonus correct? Has she spent all her skill points? Is all the gold in the sheet accounted for? And the like. Powerful characters will earn at least some points in this category. -Clarity is a measure of how well we can read everything. This includes correct grammar (No leet über txt), and legibility of the entry's stat block. We want to be able to find what we need to judge the entry. Hints to Help This is not a competition to see who can make the most optimized character. It is a competition to find who can create the most creative and interesting character; one that you would love to see played in a gaming group. Of course, optimized characters can still be creative and interesting, but optimization is not the sole focus of the competition. Please consider your format before submitting an entry. As judges, we want to know exactly where you got that +3 in Tumble, or how you've laid out your ability scores. If we are helped in this endeavor, it reduces the chances of us (as well as you) making mistakes, and points may be earned for Clarity. For example, you could lay out your modifiers to everything, from AC to Skills to Abilities. If your +3 in Tumble came from 3 ranks, 13 dexterity and a check penalty of -1, point it out to us. If your Strength score of 16 comes from a base of 13, a +2 racial bonus, and a +1 boost at fourth level, point it out to us. Also, gold is a big hassle, so if you show how much everything costs, it saves us the trouble of going IRS on you. Consider including a chart or something that shows the complete level build-up of your entry, incase of cross-class skills, stacking class features and other such stuff that would be otherwise difficult for us judges to detect. Backgrounds are very important in this competition, worth at least 10 points. While your entry's background doesn't have to be literary genius, you are advised to cover at least the basic stuff, like parents, friends, homeland, motivation, behavior, and at least one plot point that a DM can latch onto, among others. In this case, covering most or all of the aspects of a character is more advisable than simply focusing on one or two aspects in great detail. Don't worry, though, length is usually not an issue for us judges. The Leadership feat is quite often a wonderful choice. It offers characters a lot of power, and provides for some excellent background exploration. If you opt to give your PC the Leadership feat, we don't need a full stat block for the cohort or followers; all we need is the cohort's name, race, class(es), and level(s). You can provide the same sort of information for important followers. Note that you can provide more information - but doing so only increases your chances of miscalculating something, and therefore lowering your score. You are allowed to build characters with non-standard races, including Monster Races from the MM. However, please carefully consider this path before attempting it. You are creating a character of the appropriate ECL, and monster races have caused many contestants to stumble over the mathematics involved. Make sure you are prepared to walk this difficult road. (Ye Be Warned!) It is also very helpful if you list the basic racial stats for such characters. Our list of Eligible Judges are Doopliss, The Chilli God, Zherog, jennibert, JasonOrlandoHawk, Heros_Backpack, DarkKitsune, and Mercurius. The gold-medal winner of each Hero Craftsmen competition will be added to this list as a prize; after each competition, we will seek volunteers for the next contest from the list until we have three judges. It is a voluntary thing, so if you (as a recent gold-medal winner) feel uncomfortable with judging, or just don't have the time, that's fine with us. Our judges for this contest will be Zherog, jennibert, and Mercurius; Zherog will be our coordinating judge. This contest starts when this post is posted, and is due to end at 11:59pm on Monday the 26th of February 2007 GMT, giving you two weeks to enter your characters. If you have any concerns or suggestions to consider for the next Hero Craftsman competition, don't hesitate to post your comments in This Thread. (http://boards1.wizards.com/showthread.php?t=621823) Finally, best of luck to all entries.
Zherog 02-12-07, 07:01 PM	Big List O' Entries Kaylee Devenshire and Loki (http://boards1.wizards.com/showpost.php?p=11480566&postcount=21), by DarkKitsune Zeek, cat burglar (http://boards1.wizards.com/showpost.php?p=11491031&postcount=29), by Heros_Backpack Araithor, son of Faraithor, The Cavalier Prince (http://boards1.wizards.com/showpost.php?p=11503829&postcount=33), by JasonOrlandoHawk Healer Wellford (http://boards1.wizards.com/showpost.php?p=11512524&postcount=37), by Haruspex Mikolos and Ferros (http://boards1.wizards.com/showpost.php?p=11557761&postcount=66), by wrecan Mendalyn Ent'Sur the Betrayed (http://boards1.wizards.com/showpost.php?p=11576372&postcount=81), by Far_Traveler Thibaude de Xinoe and Imychtazid (http://boards1.wizards.com/showpost.php?p=11579339&postcount=83), by Orchomenos Drakth'yar the Invincible (http://boards1.wizards.com/showpost.php?p=11581339&postcount=84), by Comus The freedom defenders (http://boards1.wizards.com/showpost.php?p=11593566&postcount=86), by Lazzmaniandevil Balrock Gourd (http://boards1.wizards.com/showpost.php?p=11594715&postcount=87), by edwardsobel Sir Isaiah Heavenson (http://boards1.wizards.com/showpost.php?p=11597180&postcount=90), by AmericanYeti Don, Key Hotay of Lamancha (http://boards1.wizards.com/showpost.php?p=11598093&postcount=91), by Kit_the_Odd Roscoe and Brick (http://boards1.wizards.com/showpost.php?p=11601388&postcount=95), by Endarrion (DQ'ed for being late) The Good Paladin Devorczek and Mysterious Sister Fred (http://boards1.wizards.com/showpost.php?p=11602639&postcount=100), by Shan_TheBabau_Burke (DQ'ed for being late)
Zherog 02-12-07, 07:01 PM	Grand List of FAQ's Q: Where can I send my bribe money to the judges? A: Contact judges via PM, and details can be worked out. :smirk: Q: Can I use different campaign settings (Eg-Forgotten Realms) as the base setting of my entry's background? A: That's fine, we have no problems with material from other settings in backgrounds only. Just, no mechanical material from other settings in your entry's stat block, and if you could explain any vague references that we might not catch, it would help us as well. Q: Are Monstrous races allowed? And if so, do you want the effective character level to be 6 or just the total class level to be 6? A: Anything from the list of allowed sources is allowed; ECL should be 6 when all is said and done. Remember to take both racial Hit Dice and Level Adjustment into account when making the character. Q: Do the sample arrays (in General Rule #7) include bonuses for every 4th Hit Dice? A: Nope. People love to create characters with ECL +1 (and higher), so we have merely provided the Base Stats. It is your job to adjust those stats appropriately during character creation. Also, please note, those are SAMPLE scores. You may use the 28-point buy method for Ability Score Generation found in the PHB. You are not required to use the scores provided. Q: Are spellbooks considered "crafted magic items" [with regard to Rule 8] and how are they considered in the cost of "basic equipment" for purposes of this contest? A: Spellbooks are mundane items (unless enhanced as described in Complete Arcane), and as such are not eligible for Rule 8's benefit, although wizards start with one free spellbook at character creation. Also note that adding spells beyond a wizard's allocated number of free spellbook spells per level costs the character money (for both the scribing materials and the method used to acquire a copyable version of the spell) as normal. Q: The Complete Adventurer presents several masterwork musical instruments that each provide a bonus to a specific bardic music ability. I want my character to use a masterwork violin but the closest thing to it is a fiddle. Can I use a masterwork violin but have it gain the special ability of the fiddle? A: Yes. However, as violins are generally less uplifting than fiddles, the effect of the fiddle might not be appropriate. So be careful. Q: If a character has no effect on the game and isn't statted out, can you use a class from a book that isn't permitted? A: Yes, you can toss such an NPC into the background with something from a different source. However, the use of such material may have a limiting effect on the NPC's use by the DM, which may affect your score slightly.
JasonOrlandoHawk 02-12-07, 07:09 PM	Would animal companions, familiars, or special mounts work for this competition?
DarkKitsune 02-12-07, 08:36 PM	Just a clarification: "Through the rules" means the character must have Leadership or a similar feat from the allowed material (although I don't know of any off hand), or a class ability that grants some form of follower (JasonOrlandoHawk listed a few, Summon Shadow [Shadowdancer], and Fiendish Servant [Blackguard] seem equally likely), right?
Zherog 02-12-07, 08:40 PM	Would animal companions, familiars, or special mounts work for this competition? Just a clarification: "Through the rules" means the character must have Leadership or a similar feat from the allowed material (although I don't know of any off hand), or a class ability that grants some form of follower (JasonOrlandoHawk listed a few, Summon Shadow [Shadowdancer], and Fiendish Servant [Blackguard] seem equally likely), right? All of those are fine examples of what we have in mind. And, in fact, one of the reasons we went with level 12 was so folks could easily qualify for prestige classes such as those mentioned.
Nani? 02-12-07, 10:45 PM	I take it you are being intentionally vague on what "through the rules" mean so that we have lots of creative license. I already thought of one that might qualify that fit none of those catagories. All the Best, Nani?
TheChilliGod 02-12-07, 11:14 PM	Valentines Day...? :bigeyes: :allalone: Yeah, I don't think I'll enter this one (on time, at least; don't wanna take another gold just yet, :P ), but I do know that one or two of my friends might be interested in entering anyway. One question I want to put out. You're placing more emphasis on the sidekick for this contest; should we therefore be more obliged to fully stat out said sidekick?
Zherog 02-13-07, 08:50 AM	I take it you are being intentionally vague on what "through the rules" mean so that we have lots of creative license. I already thought of one that might qualify that fit none of those catagories. All the Best, Nani? We said "through the rules" to avoid having to say "via animal companion, familiar, the Leadership feat, a fiendish companion, a shadow companion, or any other way you can think of to gain a sidekick." :D One question I want to put out. You're placing more emphasis on the sidekick for this contest; should we therefore be more obliged to fully stat out said sidekick? No, not really. A stat block for a familiar or animal companion (or similar) would be a good thing - but that's true in any contest. Leadership can continue to use the same abbreviated stat line for the cohort. If you want more stats, go for it - but like the "hints" say, remember that it means a higher chance of errors. What we do expect, however, is your backstory will show your sidekick some love.
Far_Traveler 02-13-07, 11:01 AM	Hm. I was expecting the abherrations... Sadly, my entry could, with some tweaking, fit in here too... Ah well, to the shelf! I think I shall be Soldayn the Unseen...
JasonOrlandoHawk 02-13-07, 11:21 AM	I will admit that the theme of "Sidekicks" caught me a little off guard. I honestly didn't expect them to let Abberations be the theme this time around. I am an abberation fan, and I am guilty of hinting (rather shamelessly), but I guessed (correctly) that the judges would find something else to put on the field. What I actually expected was a "Cupid's Day" theme. I was working, with some difficulty, on a Halfling Wizard Matchmaker, in hopes of seeing that theme come about. Instead, they have successfully thrown me for a loop by putting out the theme "sidekicks." I was up until Midnight referencing various character ideas, but I think I have settled on one. I'll give everyone a small hint: I'm going to be rereading some portions of the Lord of the Ring trilogy for inspiration and guidance over the next few days. Consider this my official "tossing my hat into the ring." Best luck to everyone! My sympathy to the judges! (I'm sorry Mercurius. Your first time judging, and I know you find high level characters uninspiring. I will never forget the :ton: that I had to dig through when I judged The Year of the Dragons.) So, my question to the judges: How many entries do you expect? Jason
Zherog 02-13-07, 12:07 PM	I will admit that the theme of "Sidekicks" caught me a little off guard. I honestly didn't expect them to let Abberations be the theme this time around. I am an abberation fan, and I am guilty of hinting (rather shamelessly), but I guessed (correctly) that the judges would find something else to put on the field. We pondered it, but I'm the only judge with access to Lords of Madness. So, my question to the judges: How many entries do you expect? I think we'll be right about where we have been - 10 or so entries, all of them high quality.
jennibert 02-13-07, 04:51 PM	Hey! When did this get posted? I'm a bad judge, not even noticing when my own contest starts....but then, for a brief time this morning, Mercurius and I were afraid that our last remaining computer had given up the ghost....but fortunately all is still well:) Anyway, please, bring forth the entries, while I go dig out my fine-tooth comb. If the last couple of Hero Craftsman are any indication, that's what I'm going tto need to find mechanical errors... Happy building everyone!
Zherog 02-13-07, 05:01 PM	Hey! When did this get posted? Well, going by the time stamp on the first post, I'd say it got posted at 7pm EST Monday night. :P
jennibert 02-13-07, 05:11 PM	Well, going by the time stamp on the first post, I'd say it got posted at 7pm EST Monday night. :P yeah, yeah...:P to you too.... :D
Zherog 02-13-07, 05:35 PM	Did jennibert just give me cyber-tongue? :smirk: *** See what happens when you people don't post characters to keep me occupied? See? My mind (what's left of it) wanders into really dangerous places...
JasonOrlandoHawk 02-13-07, 05:46 PM	Sorry Zherog, I tried my best to finish my character already, but I just couldn't get it done! I'm only 75% of the way there! I'm such a bad contestant!!! :weep: Actually, I didn't count on being this far along, but I've been sitting around all day waiting for my phone company to contact me about severe bill errors. I had nothing better to do, so I started working. Maybe, just maybe, you'll have something to ignore until several days after the deadline quite soon. Because, as we know, the judges who are really on top of things, get started about 4 days late, not that I'm bragging... :cool:
Endarrion 02-13-07, 07:29 PM	Question: Are you (the judges) leaning towards more sidekick and less friendship? As in, do you want the sidekick to OBVIOUSLY be a sidekick, or would partners be viable too? See, I have an idea, but the two characters I'm thinking of are more "partners in crime" rather than, "the guy who just so happens to be around when the real hero does stuff."
Zherog 02-13-07, 08:22 PM	I'm open to however contestants what to try to meet the criteria. As long as it's done within the rules.
bhu 02-13-07, 09:14 PM	Potentially could we make a character who IS a sidekick instead?
DarkKitsune 02-13-07, 09:52 PM	This is what happens when you spend more time waiting for people than doing something constructive :P Kaylee Devenshire and Loki Female Human Rog 4/Sor 5/Arcane Trickster 3 Alignment CN Age 32 Speed 30’ Languages Common, Draconic Str 10 (0) (2 pts) Dex 16 (+3) (6 pts +2 lvl) Con 12 (+1) (4 pts) Int 12 (+1) (4 pts) Wis 10 (0) (2 pts) Chr 16 (+3) (8 pts +1 lvl) Fort +7 (+1 Sor +1 Rog +1 Trk +1 Con +3 resistance) Ref +15 (+1 Sor +4 Rog +4 Trk +3 Dex +3 resistance), Evasion, Trap Sense +1 Will +12 (+4 Sor +1 Rog +4 Trk +3 resistance) HP 48 (16.5 Rog +12.5 Sor +7.5 Trk +12 Con) Initiative +3 (Dex) AC 20 (10 +3 Dex +3 deflection, +3 armour, +1 natural), Uncanny Dodge Touch 16, flat-footed 20 BAB/Grapple +6/+6 Truestrike (Ranged) +11/+6 (1d8/19-20) Dazzler (Melee) +7/+2 (1d6/18-20) Special Abilities Summon Familiar, Sneak Attack +3d6, Impromptu Sneak Attack 1/day, Ranged Legerdemain 1/day, Trapfinding, Evasion, Uncanny Dodge, Trap Sense +1 Feats Bonded Familiar*, Extend Spell, Telling Blow**, Stealthy, Combat Casting, Alertness (familiar) Skills Appraise: +4 (+3 familiar, +1 Int), Bluff +18 (7 rog +5 sor +3 trk +3 Chr), Climb +5 (+5 competence), Concentration +6 (5 sor +1 Con), Decipher Script +8 (7 rog +1 Int), Diplomacy +10 (7 rog +3 Chr), Disable Device +8 (7 rog +1 Int), Escape Artist +10 (7 rog +3 Dex), Gather Information +13 (7 rog +3 trk +3 Chr), Hide +12 (7 rog +3 Dex +2 feat), Jump +7 (7 rog), Knowledge (Arcana) +6 (5 sor +1 Int), Move Silently +12 (7 rog +3 Dex +2 feat), Sleight of Hand +13 (7 rog +3 trk +3 Dex), Spellcraft +6 (5 sor +1 Int) Spells (6/7/7/6/3 DC 13 + spell level) Cantrips dancing lights, daze, detect magic, flare, ghost sound, light, open/close, read magic 1st-level Bigby’s tripping hand***, charm person, disguise self, magic missile, obscuring mist 2nd-level detect thoughts, knock, mirror image 3rd-level haste, hold person 4th-level scrying Truestrike (+2 seeking light crossbow) (18,335 gp) Dazzler (+1 spell storing rapier [hold person stored]) (8,320 gp) Ring of Protection +3 (18,000 gp) Ring of Climbing (2,500 gp) Wand of Fireball [5th level] (11,250 gp) Bracers of Armour +3 (9,000 gp) Cloak of Resistance +3 (9,000 gp) Deck of Illusions (8,100 gp) Amulet of Natural Armour +1 (2,000 gp) Backpack (2 gp) Bedroll (1 sp) Scroll Case (1 gp) Flint and Steel (1 gp) Ink (8 gp) Inkpen (1 sp) 5 sheets paper (2 gp) 10 day’s trail rations (5 gp) Waterskin (1 gp) Grappling Hook (1 gp) Silk Rope (10 gp) 10 Sunrods (20 gp) Spell Component Pouch (5 gp) Thieves’ Tools, MW (100 gp) Familiar (100 gp) Bottle of Fine Wine (10 gp) Silver Mirror (for scrying) (1000 gp) Elixir of Love (150 gp) 2x Gold Earring (5 gp) Belt Pouch, 2 (2 gp) Clothing (see below - free at char gen) 66 gp, 8 sp Clothing: Loose white blouse, deerskin breeches, black leather boots, soft leather gloves, red sash, purple scarf, purple headband (counts as traveler’s outfit) Familiar Male Raven Size/Type Tiny Animal Hit Dice 11d8 (24 hp) Initiative +2 Speed 10 ft. (2 squares), fly 40 ft. (average) Armor Class 17 (+2 size, +2 Dex +3 natural), touch 14, flat-footed 15 Base Attack/Grapple +6/-7 Attack Claws +8 melee (1d2-5) Full Attack Claws +8 melee (1d2-5) Space/Reach 2½ ft./0 ft. Special Qualities Low-light vision, Improved Evasion, Share Spells, Empathic Link, Deliver Touch Spells, Speak with Master, Speak Language (Common) Saves Fort +3, Ref +11, Will +11 Abilities Str 1, Dex 15, Con 10, Int 8, Wis 14, Cha 6 Skills Listen +5 (raven), Spot +7 (raven), Bluff +13 (15 master -2 Chr), Concentration +5 (5 master), Decipher Script +6 (7 master -1 Int), Diplomacy +5 (7 master -2 Chr), Disable Device +6 (7 master -1 Int), Escape Artist +9 (7 master +2 Dex), Gather Information +8 (10 master -2 Chr), Hide +9 (7 master +2 Dex), Knowledge (Arcana) +4 (5 master -1 Int), Move Silently +9 (7 master +2 Dex), Sleight of Hand +12 (10 master +2 Dex), Spellcraft +4 (5 master -1 Int) Feats Alertness, Weapon Finesse Alignment: N Kaylee was the fourth child of a minor noble family. Being far enough down the line of succession, she was eternally passed over in favour of her elder siblings, leaving no attention left to give to her. Soon she began stirring up trouble, finding it an excellent way of shifting the spotlight on herself - after all, negative attention is better than no attention at all. By her mid teens, she was regularly stealing from other noble houses, not because she wanted what they had, but for the thrill of it. Soon she began developing magical abilities, and her family wasted no time packing her off to Stormfire Wizard Academy. It was there that she met her familiar, Loki, although the alliance started off a little rockily - she threw a pillow at the raven because she was upset at getting such an ‘ugly’ familiar. Unfortunately, she showed the same lack of discipline there as back at home. While her teachers found her pranks amazingly ingenious, they were rather less impressed with her study habits, and eventually threw her out, sending a missive to her father. Loki tattled on the missive, and Kaylee snuck out before her father arrived, under the guise of a traveling peasant. Finally free of obligations, she began working as a wandering fortune-teller, lightening people’s pockets for a glimpse or two at the future. She was unable to keep away from the thrill of thievery, however, and got Loki to spy out potential targets in the towns she visited while she dispensed fortunes. These places she then hit at night. Of course, it would be a lie to say that everything went well during these heists, especially with such an attention-getting personality. Loki’s forewarnings have often been the only thing saving her from vengeful villagers. Her luck ran out when she tried moving in on the port city of Haven. Haven already had it’s own thieves’ guild, and they didn’t like to share. A week after setting up shop, she came home to a burning tent and a half-dozen thugs waiting for her. Already exhausted and out of spells, she was overwhelmed and pummeled to unconciousness by these brutes. The next she woke, she was on a strange bed with a lady in burnished gold armour by her side and Loki on her head. The lady, Lady Tanya de Tinereth, Maiden of Roses, explained that her party was drawn to the scene by Loki, who kept diving them and screeching at them to follow. When they reached the thugs, the attackers fled, and the party remained to heal the dying woman. Tanya and her party insisted on keeping watch over Kaylee’s recovery, and, during that time, Kaylee saw firsthand how well-respected these people were, without needing birth or rank to set them apart. By the time they felt she was fit to go on her own again, she had pledged to become an adventurer herself, that she be the one people tell stories around the fire about. Kaylee is an active attention-seeker. She has difficulty remaining in the background for any length of time, and often jumps on an opportunity for fun before finalizing the details. That said, her ability to think on her feet keeps her from getting into too much trouble. That and Loki, the wiser of the two, often pointing things out at just the right second. She has come to rely on the bird’s insights and retiring manner to get her through life without having anything blow up in her face (she calls him her ‘philosophical parrot’). Outside of adventure, she does fortune-telling on the side, and harbours an air of mystery (no reason why - she just thinks it’s cool), but is always ready for action. The scent of incense washes into your nostrels as you enter the tent. Inside is a slim woman sitting on the floor, dressed simply, but with her features obscured by a long violet cloak and scarf, revealing only her chocolate-coloured eyes, which are full of delight and mischief. “Come, come.” She motions with one gloved hand. You step closer and are startled by a rough caw from above you. The biggest corvid you’ve ever seen sits there, eyeing you, and caws again. The woman laughs “Loki says if he can spook you, you may want to leave now.” she pushes back her cloak and scarf, revealing a deeply tanned skin and straight black hair tied back in a ponytail. Gold flashes from both her ears - wide hoop earrings dangle in the candlelight. “I am the Seer, what did you wish to know?” Lord Durin Devenshire A few years after Kaylee vanished, plague struck the Devenshire household, killing all her siblings and leaving her as the sole inheritor on the estate. Since then, Lord Devenshire has been scouring the country looking for her, without luck (she hasn’t been back to her home country in a long time). Should he manage to find her, he would try to dispel such foolish notions of adventurehood, thieving, and two-bit fortune telling and make her embrace the life of a good noblewoman, taking care of the husband he picks out for her - forcibly, if need be. Lady Tanya de Tinereth A high-leveled paladin of mercy, Lady Tanya has been trying to impress upon Kaylee the virtues of a life outside of crime (she’s listening), acting for the good of others (boring, but whatever), and humility (HA!). In spite of the differences in their philosophies, the two have become good friends and often swap tales in between adventures. * - PHB2, pg 75 ** - PHB2, pg 83 *** - PHB2, pg 103
TheChilliGod 02-13-07, 10:17 PM	Because, as we know, the judges who are really on top of things, get started about 4 days late, not that I'm bragging... :cool:So, that's where I went wrong last contest. I got to make a mental note of that, "Start 4 days late!" Anyway... I've thought of an idea (Think of a character who's cohort is mind-controlling him!), but if I dared to post it within the allowed time frame, I'd win. And I don't want to win. Unless I could get it DQ'd on purpose some other way...
Avalon® 02-14-07, 03:55 AM	Well, you could always edit it after the 15 min grace period. :D Consider this as throwing my hat into the ring.
Zherog 02-14-07, 08:11 AM	List updated!
AmericanYeti 02-14-07, 11:23 AM	Does the sidekick have to be real (game-wise, anyway)? Could a character, say, have a split-personality like Gollum?
Zherog 02-14-07, 12:52 PM	My opinion - jennibert or Mercurius could have a different opinion... I want people to have fun with the theme, and be creative. If you think you can make a fun, creative, and rules legal character with a split personality then in my opinion you should. Lots of ideas can fit into this theme. As long as you remember the overriding tenent - develop a playable character - then you should feel free to stretch the definition of the theme.
Seeking_Knight_of_Graves 02-14-07, 01:08 PM	I want to ask just to be on the safe side. Since the PHB II is allowed are the varient classes available or just the new classes? Thanks in advance. This would be my first Hero Craftsman competition I would join. I would have done the last one but I got soo many ideas it was nutty. Anywho again thanks.
Zherog 02-14-07, 01:40 PM	Whatever is in PHB2 is available.
Heros_Backpack 02-14-07, 09:59 PM	Zeek, Cat Burglar The fluffy grey cat nudges his way through the half open door of the jewellers and winds his way through the customers’ feet. As he passes one of the display cabinets, its door swings slightly open and three rings float out and vanish under the cat’s fur. A few minutes later, a harried wizard scoots into the shop, looks round, picks up the cat and leaves. Outside, the cat jumps to the ground, snorts with disgust and yowls, “That man’s as bad as a hawk! I only managed to get into one cabinet before he spotted the door moving. Let’s try somewhere else.” The wizard replies meekly, “Yes, Zeek,” and follows the cat down the street. Zeek Male Cat Rogue 6/ Psion 5/ Thrallherd 1 CN Tiny Animal Initiative +2 (+2 Dex), Senses: Darkvision 60 ft, Listen +4, Spot +7 Languages: Common, Orc, Dwarven Age 19, Length 1’ 2”, Weight 3 lb Deity: None AC 20 (+2 dex, +2 size, +3 nat armor, +2 deflection, +1 insight) Touch 17, Flatfooted 20 (Uncanny Dodge) HP 38 (6d6 + 5d4 + 1d4) Fort +3 (+2 Rogue, +1 Psion) Ref +8 (+5 Rogue, +1 Psion, + 2 Dex) (Evasion) Will +9 (+2 Rogue, +4 Psion, +2 Thrallherd, +1Wis) Speed 30’ Melee: Bite att +9/+4, dam 1d3-1, crit 20(x2) and Claws, att +7/+2, dam 1d2-1, crit 20 (x2) BAB +6 (+4 Rogue, +2 Psion) Grapple -4 Base Abilities (28 pt array - 15, 14, 13, 12, 11, 10) (As Half Orc) Str 13 (11 +2 race) Dex 15 Con 12 Int 12 (14 -2 race) Wis 13 Cha 8 (10 -2 race) (After polymorphed to cat) Str 3 (base racial) Dex 15 (base racial) Con 10 (base racial) Int 12 Wis 13 Cha 8 Current Abilities (modifier) Str 7 (-2) (+4 belt) Dex 15 (+2) Con 10 (+0) Int 19 (+4) (+3 lvl, +4 headband) Wis 13 (+1) Cha 8 (-1) Special Abilities Evasion Sneak Attack +3d6 (Deadly Precision - reroll 1’s) Trapfinding Trap sense +1 Thrall Uncanny Dodge Feats: Deadly Precision, Dodge, Inquisitor, Multiattack, Psionic Dodge, Up the Walls, Weapon Finesse. Skills: Appraise +11 (+4 int, 7 ranks) Balance +12 (+2 Dex, 2 ranks, +8 racial) Bluff +9 (-1 Cha, 10 ranks) Climb +13 (+2 Dex, 7 ranks, +4 racial) Concentration +5 (5 ranks) Diplomacy +6 (-1 Cha, 7 ranks) Escape Artist +6 (+2 Dex, 4 ranks) Gather Information +5 (-1 Cha, 6 ranks) Hide +11 (+15 in long grass or heavy undergrowth) (+2 Dex, 5 ranks, +4 racial (+8 racial in grass etc)) Intimidate +4 (-1 Cha, 5 ranks) Jump +5 (+2 Dex, 3 ranks) Knowledge (local) + 7 (+4 Int, 3 ranks) Knowledge (Psionics) +12 (+4 Int, 8 ranks) Listen +4 (+1 Wis, 3 ranks) Move Silently +6 (+2 Dex, +4 racial) Search +10 (+4 Int, 6 ranks) Sense Motive +9 (+19 vs Bluff checks - feat) (+1 Wis, 8 ranks) Spot +7 (+1 Wis, 6 ranks) Use Magic Device +4 (-1 Cha, 5 ranks) Psionic Powers: Power point pool 35 pts, Save DC 14 + lvl, Manifester lvl 5 1st lvl powers: Farhand, Force Screen, Hammer, Mindlink, Missive, Psionic Charm 2nd lvl powers: Brain Lock, Cloud Mind, Psionic Knock, Psionic Tongues 3rd lvl power: Touchsight Possesions: Belt of giant strength +4 (16000gp) Hewards Handy saddlebags (as haversack) (2000gp) Amulet of Natural Armor +3 (18000gp) Headband of Intellect +4 (16000gp) Bracers of Mighty Claws +1 (9000gp) (as Amulet of mighty fists - x 1.5 for new slot) Dusty Rose prism ioun stone (5000gp) 2x Silversheen (500gp) Ring of Protection +2 (8000gp) Lenses of Night (as goggles of night) (12000gp) 10 days rations (5gp) Waterskin (1gp) Basket (4sp) Winter Blanket (5sp) 3 tanglefoot bags (150gp) 2x Alchemist’s fire (40gp) 2x Antitoxin (100gp) 2x Cure Light Wounds potion (100gp) 2x mage armor potion (100gp) 2x magic fang potion (100gp) Cash: 903gp, 1sp TOTAL OWNED: 88,000gp Thrall: Carrun, CN male human wizard 8 Followers: 8x Expert 1 Level 1 - Rogue 1 Feat: Dodge. Skill Ranks (32 class pts + 4 Int): Appraise 4, Bluff 4, Climb 4, Diplomacy 4, Hide 4, Intimidate 4, Spot 4, Search 4 Level 2 - Rogue 2 Skill ranks bought (8 class pts +1 Int) (Total): Appraise 1 (5), Bluff 1 (5), Climb 1 (5), Gather Information 1 (1), Hide 1 (5), Intimidate 1 (5), Spot 1 (5), Search 1 (5) Level 3 - polymorphed - Rogue 2/ Psion 1 Feats: Psionic Dodge (class bonus), Weapon Finesse (level) Skill Ranks bought (2 classpts +1 Int) (Total): Gather Information 1 (2), Knowledge (psionics) 1 (1), Sense Motive 1 (1) Level 4 - Rogue 2/ Psion 2 +1 Int Skill Ranks bought (2 classpts +1 Int) (Total): Knowledge (psionics) 2 (3), Sense Motive 1 (2) Level 5 - Rogue 3/ Psion 2 Skill Ranks bought (8 class pts +1 Int) (Total): Appraise 1 (6), Balance 1 (1), Bluff 1 (6), Climb 1 (6), Diplomacy 1 (5), Knowledge (local) 1 (1), Listen 1 (1), Sense Motive 1 (3), Use Magic Device 1 (1) Level 6 - Rogue 3/ Psion 3 Feat: Up The Walls (level) Skill Ranks bought (2 classpts +1 Int) (Total): Concentration 1 (1), Gather Information 1 (5) Knowledge (psionics) 1 (4) Level 7 - Rogue 3/ Psion 4 Skill Ranks bought (2 classpts +1 Int) (Total): Concentration 1 (2), Knowledge (psionics) 2 (6) Level 8 - Rogue 3/ Psion 5 Feat: Inquisitor +1 Int Skill Ranks bought (2 classpts +2 Int) (Total): Concentration 1 (3), Knowledge (psionics) 2 (8), Sense Motive 1 (4) Level 9 - Rogue 3/ Psion 5/ Thrallherd 1 Feat: Deadly Precision Skill Ranks bought (2 classpts +2 Int) (Total): Bluff 2 (8), Concentration 1 (4), Sense Motive 1 (4) Level 10 - Rogue 4/ Psion 5/ Thrallherd 1 Skill Ranks bought (8 classpts +2 Int) (Total): Appraise 1 (7), Balance 1 (2), Bluff 1 (9), Climb 1 (7), Diplomacy 1 (6), Escape Artist 1 (1), Knowledge (local) 1 (2), Listen 1 (2), Sense Motive 1 (6), Use Magic Device 1 (2) Level 11 - Rogue 5/ Psion 5/ Thrallherd 1 Skill Ranks bought (8 classpts +2 Int) (Total): Escape Artist 2 (3), Gather Information 1 (6), Jump 2 (2), Search 1 (6), Sense Motive 1 (6), Spot 1 (6) Use Magic Device 2 (4) Level 12 - Rogue 6/ Psion 5/ Thrallherd 1 Feat: Multiattack +1 Int Skill Ranks bought (8 classpts +2 Int) (Total): Bluff 1 (10), Concentration 1cc (5), Diplomacy 1 (7), Escape Artist 1 (4), Jump 1 (3), Knowledge (local) 1 (3), Listen 1 (3), Sense Motive 1 (8), Use Magic Device 1 (5) Background Zeek was a fairly ordinary, if thuggish, half-orc rogue before he made the mistake of first laughing at, and then teasing, a wild-shaped druid. The infuriated druid polymorphed Zeek into a cat and then chased him the entire length of the city, finally leaving him half way up a tree and absolutely exhausted. The druid, satisfied that Zeek had learnt his lesson, then sauntered away, leaving the spell to dissipate in its own time. It never did. Zeek, realising he was no longer in any shape to back people into corners and demand all their money, turned to unlocking the power of his own mind. Learning first to communicate with humanoids again and then to deceive them, he slipped in and out of shops, galleries, and anywhere else he could acquire small, portable valuables. He still felt at a disadvantage without ease of usable fingers, though, and set himself to learning the secrets of summoning a Thrall companion. When he finally achieved his goal, he called a wizard, knowing that he could pass at all times for the man’s familiar and never be noticed. Later, as believers trickled in to join them, Zeek set them up with a chain of pawnbroker shops that he uses to launder his thievings. There are now 8 shops in the chain, each run for Zeek by a believer, and all doing brisk business in their various city districts. Carrun, the wizard, and Zeek thoroughly enjoy each other’s company and treat the thieving as something of a joke. No-one has suspected them yet as everyone knows that wizards never have time to learn thieving! Carrun plays (and often - to Zeek’s disgust - overplays) the role of the harried, absent-minded, unworldly wizard who only really notices his books. Recently, however, thieving from city shops has begun to seem a little too easy, a little too tame to Zeek and he itches to go out into the wider world and exploit all those shops and towns that he hasn’t yet raided. Description Zeek now stands a meager 14 inches from nose to tail and is sure, if he wanted to, he could use his Farhand to pick himself up by the scruff of the neck. His long grey fur stands out around him like a large fluffy ball, hiding almost all of his equipment in its depths. He will bypass guards in any way possible, from charms to hiding, to wiping their memory. He also has a penchant for running up walls, leaping onto the head and shoulders of the nearest opponent, digging in his claws and extending Hammer until whoever it is begs for mercy. Arith, the druid: Although he has a hot temper and a bad habit of assigning instant punishments, Arith is quite a good sort of bloke and never dreamed he was leaving Zeek in such a situation. If he learned what had happened, he would hurry to set things right again - which may not please Zeek, now he has adapted to his new form. Shan, another local pawnbroker: Shan became used to dealing with a small, smart cat as Zeek made him his regular fence over the years. Since losing Zeek’s business and having to compete with the string of new, more reliable pawnbrokers, he has grown increasingly angry and determined to ‘have it out with that blasted cat!’. Zeek would like to get out and see the world a bit more, and is quite happy to tag Carrun onto a party of his level and simply follow along, swiping any little things that came his way. The local thieves’ guild is being accused of Zeek’s robberies and is scouring the streets in search of the real culprit so that they can turn him over to the guards and no longer have to pick up his fines and his souring reputation.
Zherog 02-14-07, 10:50 PM	List updated!
Far_Traveler 02-15-07, 04:30 PM	Hmmm... my entry is coming together, and I must say, this will be a fun competition.
Avalon® 02-16-07, 01:14 AM	Question: Does the Slayer PRC progress a psicrystal's advancement?
JasonOrlandoHawk 02-16-07, 02:03 AM	Araithor, son of Faraithor, The Cavalier Prince Araithor, The Cavalier Prince Male Human Paladin 10/Cavalier 2 Medium Humanoid (Human) Lawful Good Aura(s): Good (Strong), Courage (Radius 10ft, Allies: +4 morale vs. Fear) Str: 20/+5 (Base: 14 (6), +2 Level (4,8), +4 Item) Dex: 12/+1 (Base: 12 (4)) Con: 14/+2 (Base: 14 (6)) Int: 12/+1 (Base: 12 (4)) Wis: 12/+1 (Base: 12 (4)) Cha: 15/+2 (Base: 12 (4), +1 Level (12), +2 Item) Hit Dice: 12d10+24 (94) Init: +1 (+1 Dex), Speed: 20ft (Base: 30ft -10ft armor), ACP: -3 AC: 26* (+10 Armor, +3 Shield, +1 Dex, +2 Deflection), T: 13, FF: 25 *: +1 when threatened by only one foe (Shield) Saves: Fort: +14 (+10 Base, +2 Con, +2 Cha) (Immune to Disease) Ref: +7 (+4 Base, +1 Dex, +2 Cha) Will: +9 (+6 Base, +1 Wis, +2 Cha) (Immune to Fear) BAB/Grap: +12/+15 Attacks: Lance (Mounted): +20/+15/+10¹; 1d8+6 (+2d6 vs. Chaotic); 20/x3 (12 BAB +5 Str +1 W. Focus +1 Enhancement +1 Class Bonus) Longsword (Mounted): +19/+14/+9¹; 1d8+6; 19-20/x2 (As Lance, but w/o W. Focus) Longsword (Ground): +18/+13/+8; 1d8+6; 19-20/x2 (12 BAB +5 Str +1 Enhancement) Throwing Axe: +14²; 1d6+6; x2; 10ft. Shortbow: +14/+9/+4²; 1d6+2 (Str. Bonus); x3; 70ft The Glory Charge: +24; 1d8+20 (Quadruple Damage); x3; Requires a Ride Check DC 20 ¹: Araithor may not make a Full Attack if his mount moves more than 5ft. He also gains a +1 “higher ground” bonus on attacks vs. medium or smaller characters. ²: Araithor takes a -4 penalty if using this weapon while his mount is making a double move, and a -8 penalty if his mount is running. Special Attacks: Smite Evil 3/day: +2/+10 vs. Evil Lay on Hands: 20pts/day (Heal HP or Damage Undead, Range: Touch) Turn Undead: 5/day, +4/2d6+9 (As Level 7 Cleric, +2 synergy Know(Religion) included) Mounted Overrun: +10 (+4 Size, +4 Str, +2 Charge), Target can’t choose to avoid Spirited Charge: Charge Action deals 2x damage (3x damage w/ Lance) Deadly Charge 1/day: Charge Action deals 3x damage (4x damage w/ Lance) Unhorse¹: Free Bull Rush Attempt vs. Mounted Opponent after successful charge attack Leaping Charge¹: Mounted Charge Attack, Ride DC 10/20 to gain +2/+4 damage. If the ride check fails, the attack automatically misses. If the ride check fails by 5 or more, you fall off your mount. Fell Trample¹: Mounted Overrun Attempts vs. Multiple Foes (resolved separately) ¹: Tactical Options from Cavalry Charger Feat Special Qualities: Paladin Spells Divine Grace (Add Cha. Bonus to Saving Throws) Divine Health (Immune to all Diseases) Aura of Courage (Immune to Fear, Allies within 10ft gain +4 vs. fear) Special Mount “Whitewind” (Note: Paladin/Cavalier levels stack to determine abilities, see below), Duration: 20 hours/day Remove Disease 2/week Ride Bonus +2 Courtly Knowledge +2 (Adds Cavalier level as competence bonus on Knowledge (Nobility & Royalty) checks) Mounted Weapon Bonus (Lance/Sword): +1/+1 Skills: (60 skill points: 16 (Level 1) + 36 (Paladin 2-9) + 8 (Cavalier 1-2)) Languages: Common, Dwarven (Automatic & Bonus Languages) Diplomacy: +11 (7 ranks, +2 Cha, +2 Synergy (Sense Motive)) Handle Animal: +17 (15 ranks, +2 Cha) Know (Nobility/Royalty): +6 (3 ranks, +1 Int, +2 Competence) Know (Religion): +6 (5 ranks, +1 Int) Ride: +20 (15 ranks, +1 Dex, +2 Synergy (Handle Animal), +2 Competence), +2 circumstance (military saddle) to “Stay in Saddle,” -3 ACP to “Fast Mount/Dismount” Sense Motive: +11/+21 vs. Feints (5 ranks, +1 Wis, +5 Competence), +10 vs. Feint (from Shield) Spot: +1/+6 vs. Disguise (+1 Wis), +5 vs. Disguise (Crown) Survival: +6 (5 ranks (cross class), +1 Wis) Feats: Armor Proficiency (Light, Medium, Heavy, Shields (except Tower Shields)) Weapon Proficiency (Simple, Martial) Mounted Combat (Level 1) Ride-By Attack (Human Bonus) Weapon Focus (Lance) (Level 3) Trample (Level 6) Spirited Charge (Level 9) Cavalry Charger [Tactical]* (Level 12) *: Complete Warrior p. 108 Paladin Spells (CL 5) Spells/day: 2/1 Save DC: 11+Spell Level Typical Spells Prepared: Level 1: Bless Weapon, Golden Barding* Level 2: Shield Other *: Complete Divine p. 166 Whitewind, Heavy Warhorse (Large Magical Beast) HD: 10d8+40 (85), Init: +1, Spd: 60ft, AC: 22 (27*), T: 10, FF: 21 (26*), BAB/Grp: +7/+15, Full Attack: +11/+11 (1d8+4, 2 hooves) and +6 (1d4+2 Bite), Space/Reach: 10ft/5ft, SQ: Low-light Vision, Scent, Empathic Link, Improved Evasion, Share Spells, Share Saving Throws, Improved Speed, Command 5/day (DC 17 to resist), SV: Fort: +18 (+4 vs. Non-Lethal), Ref: +10, Will: +7, Str: 18/+4, Dex: 13/+1, Con: 18/+4 (+1 @ 8HD), Int: 8/-1, Wis: 13/+1, Cha: 6/-2. Skills/Feats: Jump +16, Listen +8, Spot +7, Endurance, Run, Improved Natural Attack (Hoof), Lightning Reflexes *If the spell “Golden Barding” has been cast. Gear: Adventuring Gear (on person): +2 Mithral Full Plate (Armor +10, Max Dex +3, ACP -3, 25lbs) 14,500gp +1 Focused¹ Mithral Heavy Shield (Shield +3, 7.5lbs, +10 Sense Motive vs. Feint, +1 to Shield if threatened by only one foe) 5,020gp +1 Axiomatic Lance (1d10+1/x3 (+2d6 vs. Chaotic Alignment), Overcomes DR x/lawful, piercing, 10lbs) 18,310gp +1 Longsword (1d8+1/19-20/x2, slashing, 4lbs) 2,315gp +1 Throwing Axe (1d6+1/x2, RI: 10ft, slashing, 2lbs) 2,308gp Masterwork Composite Shortbow (+2 Strength Bonus) (1d6+2 (Str)/x3, RI: 70ft, 2lbs) 525gp Masterwork Dagger (1d4/19-20/x2, RI: 10ft, piercing/slashing, 1lb) 302gp Belt of Giant Strength (+4), 1lb 16,000gp Surcoat of Charisma (+2), 2lbs 4,000gp (As Cloak of Charisma +2) Signet Ring of Protection (+2) 8,005gp Crown of Steady Rulership* (+5 Sense Motive, +5 Spot vs. Disguise) 4,500gp Traveler’s Outfit (Free at Character Generation, Doesn’t count against weight limits) Pair of Platinum Rings 50gp (Focus for Shield Other spell) Silver Holy Symbol (Heironeous), 1lb 25gp Potion: Cure Moderate Wounds 300gp Potion: Blur 300gp Potion: Lesser Restoration 300gp Potion: Protect/Evil x2 100gp Arrows (20) 1gp Holy Water (Flask), 1lb 25gp Flint & Steel 1gp House Keys – Spare Coins: 12pp 32gp 9sp *Complete Adventurer p. 132 Adventuring Gear (on Whitewind): Military Saddle 20gp (+2 Ride to stay in Saddle, 75% chance to stay in saddle if unconscious) Bit and Bridle 2gp Saddlebags 4gp Feed (4 days) 2sp Bottle of Fine Wine 10gp Silk Rope (50ft) x2 20gp Spyglass 1,000gp Tent 10gp Bedroll 1sp Winter Blanket 5sp Cold Weather Outfit 8gp Soap (2lbs) 1gp Sunrod x5 10gp Additional Supplies (in home): Grand Home 5,000gp (6-room building w/ simple attached stables, low stone fence around property, p.101 DMG) Bottle of Fine Wine x2 20gp Noble’s Outfit w/ jewelry 175gp Jousting Supplies (MW Fullplate, MW Heavy Shield, 4 Blunted Lances) 1,860gp Chest (Contains Writing Supplies, Spare Potions, Jewelry) w/ Average Lock 42gp Potion: Cure Moderate Wounds x2 600gp Potion: Enlarge Person 250gp Potion: Remove Paralysis x2 600gp Paper x40 4gp Ink x4 32gp Inkpen 1sp Hooded Lantern 7gp Oil x10 1gp Hourglass 25gp Spare Mount Gear (Saddle, Bit & Bridle, Saddlebags, 4 days worth of feed) 26gp, 2sp Spade 2gp Amazing Lock (on Front Door) 150gp Araithor is a master of mounted combat, and it shows. He varies his tactics, but any trick common to expert cavalry can be found in his repertoire. In particular, he uses Ride-By Attack to insure that he stays safely out of reach of his enemies. Against medium-sized or smaller foes, he uses Trample (and Fell Trample) to further hinder their abilities to return his attacks. Most of Araithor’s mounted attacks are a simple, but deadly, charge. Araithor is also a consummate jouster, and loves the clash more than any other test of might he knows. When jousting, he always attempts to deal damage (non-lethal in tournament situations) since the Cavalry Charger feat grants him a free Bull Rush attempt on a successful attack anyways. Araithor considers it a point of honor that he never attacks his opponent’s steed, in even lethal battles. Araithor is notably less effective on foot. He does not wield his lance on foot, but sticks to his longsword so that he can retain the benefit of his shield. On foot, he keeps to very basic tactics, and typically doesn’t try anything fancy. He always seeks to return to the back of Whitewind at the first opportunity if unhorsed. Of course, he is quite protective of Whitewind, making it a point to cast Golden Barding before any combat. If he facing someone known to (in his view) dishonorably attack steeds, he will even cast Shield Other on Whitewind, in hopes of protecting his closest friend (assuming some other reason does not prevent this, such as when shielding a ward). Araithor reserves his final spell, Bless Weapon, for his longsword. When faced w/ a large group of evil foes, he uses this spell (and liberal Smite Evil attempts) to bring them down as quickly as possible. Araithor’s most famous offensive maneuver has been called “The Glory Charge.” When he’s facing an enemy he knows to be evil (typically via Detect Evil), he will combine the Deadly Charge, Leaping Charge, and Smite Evil attacks into one brutal offensive maneuver. This tactic has also known as “The Giant Slayer.” Dearest Araithor, It is a shame that a lady must wait so long to see her knight, and that I find myself writing this letter. I swear to you, if you blame that silly horse for not visiting me one more time, I shall never teach you the family secrets you desire. Seriously, the harvest is near to completion, and I haven’t seen you since the first summer wind took you North to deal with the barbarians. I know your work is important, but surely I am too! Still, this letter is congratulatory. I hear your father, King Faraithor, has officially inducted you into the station of Cavalier. That is no small task, and I am proud of you, my knight. I am sure your brothers, even Prince Farildriel, are quite proud as well. The peasants on my father's lands have been praising your family with the old legend of our Kingdom, “None can conquer the lands of Todurth because the Lords of Todurth are the strongest alive, and the first to battle on it’s behalf.” Father bears news that you have been battling a band of giants that have descended into the Western part of our lands. I worry about you constantly, you know. Can’t you leave this to the military, or to the other Paladins of your Order? Giants are no foe for a man on horseback. You should be at home, thinking of marriage. While I imagine I know your response, I dare say that you at least owe me a small favor. The court historian has been asking me many curious questions about your horse, Whitewind. I’ve tried to tell him the story that you’ve told me, but I can’t seem to tell it the way you do. Could you send him a copy of your tale? In doing so, I could rest assured that my knight was safe. When shall I see you again? Tell Whitewind that I have a many carrots waiting for him, when you arrive. Yours Sincerely, Lady Ganduwyn Mi’Lady, None could miss your company more than I, but I’ve given you my answer before. I shall not marry you until the day that you teach me how your father, Duke Radudur, manages to use bows, javelins, and other missiles so effectively from horseback. I may be a champion jouster, but I just can’t master such tricks. To hear you prattle on about my safety, when you still tease me with the knowledge of such tactics, is quite ladylike. And while I am on subjects of things you have done to annoy me, I must say, why did you have to write the word carrots in your last letter. Whitewind was looking over my shoulder, and he saw the word carrots before I did! Now, it seems like every day, he nips me two or three times, trying to nudge me in your direction. You’ve distracted him! How dare you turn my own horse against me! Still, I thank you for your kind words. The station of Cavalier is quite the honor, and it seems word of my promotion travels faster than Whitewind. In every town, the locals want to congratulate me, and I am bogged down by tales of the regalia that my father threw in my honor. Yes, even Farildriel pulled himself away from his precious falcons long enough to acknowledge my new rank. Still, I was pleased to hear that you are proud of me. No honor stands higher in my mind than your pleasure. I would have never left your fair company had it not been for the barbarians that moved in during the summer. They were nothing more than unorganized raiders, and we quickly turned them back. The interesting part of it all, though, was that they were being hunted by a dragon who then decided to hunt us! Whitewind’s loud warning woke up the camp that night, saving several men. The beast was a young adult black dragon that apparently wandered (or fled) the marshes that divide our lands from the great sea. The beast was powerful, but overconfident, which proved it’s undoing. I must report that the battle with the giants has produced some mixed results. The initial military charge, which I did lead, was quite effective, and the band broke ranks. We managed to kill 6 of the beasts. However, we missed the leader, an insightful brute named Kunak-Vukar. He, and a large portion of his tribe, slipped past the battle, and have escaped into the heart of our lands. I went with a few scouts to track him, and he was waiting for us. He ordered his tribe to target our horses! That dishonorable coward! We lost four men, and I would have died had I not masterfully faked my own demise. I saw a boulder thrown by his own hand, hurled almost perfectly. In fact, only by turning Whitewind at the last breath did the boulder fall just inches short. Of course, he didn’t realize that I was behind, not under, his boulder. When they moved off, so did I. The army is hunting them, still. However, they have done a masterful job throwing us off their trail. It seems that they have split again, into three parties, and gone in different directions. I do not know what Kunak is planning, but we are cautious. We are not going to lose men, or steeds, to that beast again. Rather than tracking him, we have split our forces to reinforce the militias guarding the most likely targets among the nearby towns. I truly wish that I could join you at your father’s estate, but the matter of these giants is of paramount importance. Besides, Master Jairva of the Hands of Heironeous has ordered me to carry this matter to it’s conclusion. He’s fearless, and I doubt he’d be persuaded, even by your threats. The Paladins of our Order are too few, so I am needed out here. I have included the story you requested, though I wonder if it is for you or Urers. He may be a historian, but he never struck me as a horse lover. If anyone is ever curious about my steed, it would be you, mi’lady. You and Whitewind both seem to forget whose steed he is! Still, I have always wanted to Whitewind’s story on paper, and you have given me an excuse. Sadly, I must return to my duties. I promise you, I shall return as soon as the fates see fit to cross our paths. Every night, I see the stars and dream of you. I remain, Your Knight in Shining Armor, Sir Araithor, The Cavalier Ah, so you want to hear the story of Whitewind. I guess that I can spare the time to write it down. That horse drives me crazy some times, but he has saved my life more times than I care to imagine, so I guess he deserves some attention. What is a knight without his noble steed? I was born Prince Araithor, son of King Faraithor, Lord of Todurth and the Western Plains. I was the fourth child, living anyways, and my parents wandered what to do with me. The first son, Denaborn, is heir to the throne, and insurance to my father’s legacy. The second and third sons, Farildriel and Radahin, provided useful marriages, bringing two stretches of land on the southern border of our lands into the kingdom. However, I was born almost 10 years after Radahin, and he was married before I even attended my first class. Most thought me the royal brat, an inconvenience at best. My father had a cunning mind though, and he decided to provide me with an opportunity my brothers never had. He asked Master Jairva of the Hands of Heironeous to accept me as a squire. My father hoped that I had the discipline to accept the mantle of a Paladin and protect our people. Very quickly, Jairva realized that I was in tune with animals. He allowed me to work with several of the animals in the compound, from the falcons to the hunting dogs. However, even at the age of 7, it was quite clear that there was animal to which I was strongly drawn: the horse. They amazed me. They fascinated me. I think I learned to ride before I learned to swing a sword. When I was nine, one of the horses became pregnant much later in the breeding season than normal, and this late pregnancy caused the birth to fall well on into autumn. Our worst fears were confirmed when an early snowstorm buried the compound. Late one night, while the winds howled, the servants informed us that it was time for the newborn to arrive. I went with Master Jairva and several others. We honestly expected to lose the poor animal in the storm, but Master Jairva was skilled. He helped deliver the newborn and protect the mother from the worst of the cold. The baby, ironically enough, was as white as the world to which it was born. I remember muttering the words “White Wind” at the sight of such a beautiful animal. Our bond was formed from that first moment. I grew up with Whitewind. It was clear that he was my horse. We trained together. I rode (and lost) my first joust with Whitewind. When it came time for me to serve in the defense of our lands, Whitewind was at my side. We were bonded. I still remember that battle with the Grey Orcs. They came out of the caves a few days south of the Dwarven lands. They were stronger, and much more dangerous, than the regular orcs that we faced patrolling our lands. I was still pretty green back then, and one of the orcs took me off Whitewind’s back with a well placed spear-thrust. I hit the ground hard, and the orc came in to finish me off Suddenly, Whitewind was between me and the orc, kicked and biting with a terrifying fury. I watched Whitewind battle for me like a mother bear defends her own cubs. Sadly, Whitewind took a spear-thrust to the lung, and though the orc would collapse dead to the ground, so would my best friend. Things just weren’t the same after that. I was given a new horse, and it behaved well enough, but I lost so much heart. My best friend had passed away. I served for two more years, battling the bands of orcs, goblins, gnolls, and other savages that frequent our lands, honing my skill with the lance, but mourning the loss of my closest friend. At the end of my tour of duty, which was thankfully light, Master Jairva told me that it was time for me to learn the next secret of the Paladin, summoning a mount blessed by the gods. I was insulted at first. No one could replace my beloved Whitewind, but Jairva insisted. After a week’s worth of internal debate, I swallowed my pride and prayed for a mount. The first sound I heard lifted my spirit unlike anything I could’ve expected. A familiar whiny resounded through the small planar rip, and a beautiful white horse, whose name I already knew, stepped through to greet me. My Whitewind had returned! My first order of business was making sure that I would never lose him to another well-placed weapon thrust again. With my master’s permission, I traveled three weeks to the Dwarven kingdom near our southern border, where the Dwarven Paladins were rumored to summon golden armor for their mounts from out of the air. It took a month’s long service, but I learned the spell, and even forged a useful alliance for the Kingdom of Todurth. After that, our adventures became the source of legend. Dire wolves, Ogres, A band of viscous druids, and even three renegade nightmares ridden by lesser demons. All of it, and more, I challenged, and overcame, with the help of my companion Whitewind. We worked in perfect unison, and all the men I worked besides commented that they had never seen a horse as amazing as my Whitewind. The countryside began to talk about the Prince and his horse. Then, there were the tournaments. I am reasonable with the sword and bow, but not great, but the jousts! That! That is another story! Whitewind and I quickly became a force to be reckoned with in the jousts. I quickly collected enough prize money to buy my own small piece of land, and home, about two days ride from my father’s estate. We were a legend. I even remember meeting you, Ganduwyn, on one of my adventures with Whitewind. Your father, Duke Radudur, had complained of two Hieracosphinx hunting his herds along the Green River, on the north of his lands. He had requested military intervention, which apparently meant his daughter had to go sneaking off to see what was happening. I will admit your archery talents, learned from your father, were incredibly useful. Still, if you obey your future husbands orders as well as you obey your father’s, I imagine the poor soul will worry himself to death. My adventures have continued since then. Most recently, I helped drive a pack of Gorgons that were threatening some farms out of our lands. These activities caused Master Jairva to nominate me for the rank of Cavalier, the highest non-command post in our military. All of the major commanders in the Cavalry agreed that I had earned the honor, and I was knighted Sir Araithor two weeks before the harvest. Everyone at the ceremony agreed that Whitewind was the star of the show, however. Whitewind has even proven his valor against the giants. He hasn’t shied away from combat, despite the boulders that have come raining down. One arrogant giant stood waiting to crush Whitewind and I during the first charge, but they didn’t know about my Glory Charge. At the last second, Whitewind threw that last ounce of speed into it, and my lance drove strait into the heart of a very shocked hill giant. The men having nicknamed my favorite tactic “The Giant Killer” ever since. I can’t wait to use it on Kunak-Vukar. With Whitewind’s help, I will remove that beast from my homeland once and for all! Dearest Araithor, I am sorry to write you again so soon, but I am in desperate need of help. My father has been kidnapped. The giant you spoke of, Kunak-Vukar, has captured my father, and severely injured several of his best men. Though he has not assaulted our castle, I can hear him taunting us at night, and he allows my father’s tortured screams to drift up to the castle walls. I am desperate. Your foe threatens your love. Please, my knight, come and save my father. I do not even know if you will get this letter, but I must hope that you will come. Please, help me! I do not know how long until Kunak attempts to destroy this palace. Without my father here, I’m sure he will succeed. Your Lady, Gundawyn (Found on an arrow fired into the courtyard late at night) Mi’Lady, Whitewind and I are already here. Your Knight in Shining Armor, Sir Araithor The Kingdom of Todurth Todurth is a large, but sparsely populated kingdom located in the Western Plains, well away from the Great Sea. It is a rolling, hilly landscape, perfectly suited to farming and raising livestock. The land is particularly well known for it’s powerful warhorses and lethal cavalry. Todurth maintains a large, mobile cavalry, which supplements militias of the various small towns that dot the plains. While large, Todurth is only a moderate power compared to other kingdoms because of it’s relatively small, scattered population. Sir Araithor, the Cavalier Prince Araithor is the 4th son of King Faraithor, and a Paladin in the Hands of Heironeous. He is slightly over 6’ tall, with long blonde hair and blue eyes. He has the build and reflexes of a horse master, and he is notably more comfortable in the presence of horses than men. He is the source of a lot of gossip, both with his daring adventures and his curious romance with Lady Gundawyn. He typically is seen wearing his full battle gear, with a beautiful embroidered blue surcoat, bearing both his family crest and the symbol of Heironeous, clearly visible above his armor. He is rather intense in battle, but fiercely protective of his mount, Whitewind. Whitewind Whitewind is Araithor’s steed, and closest friend. They are very strongly bonded, and both would give their life for the other without a thought. Whitewind is particularly fond of carrots, and has even learned to recognize the word, when written. Whitewind stubbornly refuses to let anyone, other than Araithor, ride him. He has, however, allowed Lady Gundawyn to ride him, and he frequently nips Araithor when Lady Gundawyn commands him to do so. Lady Gundawyn Lady Gundawyn is the daughter of Duke Radudur, the richest nobleman in Northern Todurth. Duke Radudur is a skilled hunter, and he taught his daughter the tactics of the mounted archer. Lady Gundawyn and Araithor have been the subject of a lot of courtly debate, as to when, and if, they will ever marry. They seem to bicker a bit, but they are rather clearly in love. Sir Araithor claims that his six-tournament jousting winning streak has come about for no other reason than, “that is when the Lady first gave me the honor of kissing her hand.” King Faraithor, Prince Denaborn, Prince Farildriel, & Prince Radahin Araithor’s father is the King of Todurth, and the other three princes are Araithor’s older brothers. They are all active in the political affairs of Todurth. King Faraithor hopes to concede the throne to Denaborn, an incredible duelist, at the start of the next planting season. Farildriel is a ranger, and falconer. He has the least contact with the rest of his family, and is always out hunting with his birds. Prince Radahin studied to be a wizard, and now lives with his family near the Dwarven borders. He has taken advantage of the alliance first formed by Araithor to bring many Dwarven-craft weapons and armor into the kingdom, not the least of which is items forged of the legendary material Mithral. Kunak-Vukar Kunak-Vukar is an incredibly intelligent and calculating Hill Giant. He has watched the lands of Todurth for many years, and finally his greed has convinced him to act. Kunak watched with interest the rise of the young prince, and knows quite well that Araithor has arrived to “save his true love.” This is all part of his plan. Kunak hopes to lure Araithor into a trap, capture him, and use him as bait to bring down King Faraithor. Kunak has successfully brought a several tribes of Hill Giants into Todurth. He hopes that capturing the prince will allow him to get his warriors within striking distance of the Palace itself.
TheChilliGod 02-16-07, 02:27 AM	Question: Does the Slayer PRC progress a psicrystal's advancement? Powers Known: Beginning at 2nd level, a slayer gains additional power points per day and access to new powers as if she had also gained a level in whatever manifesting class she belonged to before she added the prestige class. She does not, however, gain any other benefit a character of that class would have gained (bonus feats, metapsionic or item creation feats, psicrystal special abilities, and so on). Just like you wouldn't advance a familiar's abilities for taking an arcane-spellcasting PrC. Anyway, three entries already! This looks set for some record-breaking!
Zherog 02-16-07, 08:41 AM	List updated!
jennibert 02-16-07, 10:24 PM	Did jennibert just give me cyber-tongue? :smirk: So this is what happens when I forget to check the thread for a while....but Mercurius read past that point last time I was reading over his shoulder and didn't mention it...hmmm..... Oh, and Zherog, I'd like to point out: you used said smiley to me first. :smirk: On an entirely unrelated note......THREE ENTRIES? ALREADY? Wow, you guys are so cool. Even though I know that this means I'll have no life next weekend....even if it is the first Saturday I've had off since November! Woo! Seriously, I have plenty of time next weekend assuming I remember to use it (promise to try not to!) so keep the entries coming! Yay for more entries!! (Maybe I should start looking over them in advance....nah, I'll start that tomorrrow....yay procrastination....)
Haruspex 02-16-07, 10:45 PM	Healer Wellford The gnome walks among the wounded, tending to them with divine magic and bandages. He is quiet, talking only to ask the injured about their ailments. At his side is a bald human warrior dressed as a follower of Heironeous. Behind the two, a group of followers help prepare beds and organize medical supplies. Character Summary Wellford Cleric 12 Small Humanoid (Gnome) Hit Dice: 12d8+24 (81 hp) Initiative: +0 Speed: 20 ft. (4 squares), 15 ft in armor (3 squares) Armor Class: 25 (+9 full plate, +2 heavy shield, +1 size, +3 ring), touch 14, flat-footed 25 Base Attack/Grapple: +9/+9 Attack: +2 merciful morningstar +11 melee (1d6+2+1d6) Full Attack: +2 merciful morningstar +11/+6 melee (1d6+2+1d6) Space/Reach: 5 ft./5 ft. Special Attacks: Turn Undead, spell-like abilities Special Qualities: Gnome traits, healing spells at +1 caster level, greater turning 1/day Saves: Fort +15, Ref +9, Will +17 Abilities: Str 10, Dex 10, Con 14, Int 10, Wis 19 (+3 levels), Cha 14 Skill Ranks: Knowledge (religion) 15, Heal 15 Skill Modifiers: Knowledge (religion) +15, Heal +24 Feats: Skill Focus (Heal), Brew Potion, Self-Sufficient, Leadership, Scribe Scroll. Spells Normally Prepared: Domains are Healing and Sun. (6/7/6/6/5/4/3) 0- create water, detect magic, light, mending, purify food and drink, read magic; 1- cure light wounds*, bless, comprehend languages, endure elements, magic weapon, protection from evil, shield of faith; 2- cure moderate wounds*, consecrate, delay poison, remove paralysis, resist energy, status; 3- cure serious wounds*, create food and water, dispel magic, remove blindness/deafness, remove curse, remove disease; 4- cure critical wounds*, death ward, dismissal, restoration, tongues; 5- mass cure light wounds*, break enchantment, flame strike, true seeing; 6- heal*, mass bull’s strength, heroes’ feast. Environment: Any Organization: Group (with his followers and his cohort Sir Bastion) Challenge Rating: 6 Equipment: +1 glamered mithral full plate (14,200 gp), +2 merciful morningstar (18,308 gp), heavy mithral shield (1,020 gp), silver holy symbol of Pelor (25 gp), 2 healer’s kits (100 gp), cleric’s vestments (5 gp), ring of sustenance (2,500 gp), ring of protection +3 (18,000 gp), cloak of resistance +5 (25,000 gp), 11 potions of cure serious wounds (8,250 gp), spare change (598 gp) Alignment: Neutral Good Languages: Common, Gnome Advancement:[b/] By character class [b]Level Adjustment: +0 * Domain spell Wellford is a 71 year old gnome cleric. He is 3’ 5” tall and weighs just over 40 lbs. His hair is normally kept quite short, but he likes to keep sideburns and other facial hair. This is to make him look older, as humans who did not normally see gnomes used to think he was a child or a midget. He is polite to most people, but does not like bullies or violent types. He used to be somewhat pacifistic, but his experience in leading an insurrection has caused him to re-evaluate his opinions. His holy symbol is worn around his neck, over his glamered full plate armor. Ever since the Scowling Prince incident, he wears his full plate when in unknown places. He always uses it’s glamered property when he can. His shield is usually strapped to his back, and his morningstar stowed away when not in obvious danger as he believes that being openly armed is not an appropriate image for a healer. He travels with his modest group, and defers to his cohort Sir Cassius Bastion when violence is involved. Wellford’s spell selection changes if he knows there will be battle, the list above is the one he uses when doing his healing work. Wellford’s Leadership score is +12 for levels, +2 for Charisma modifier, +1 for fairness and generosity. He receives a -1 penalty for being a different alignment (cohort) and for moving around a lot (followers). This gives him a score of 14 for both cohorts and followers. All gnomes have the following racial traits, summarized below. +2 Constitution, –2 Strength, small, base land speed 20 feet, low-light vision, weapon familiarity (gnome hooked hammers), +2 racial bonus on saving throws against illusions, +1 to the Difficulty Class for all saving throws against illusion spells cast by gnomes, +1 racial bonus on attack rolls against kobolds and goblinoids, +4 dodge bonus to Armor Class against monsters of the giant type, +2 racial bonus on Listen checks, +2 racial bonus on Craft (alchemy) checks, automatic languages Common and Gnome, bonus languages: Draconic, Dwarven, Elven, Giant, Goblin, and Orc, spell-like abilities: 1/day—speak with animals (burrowing mammal only, duration 1 minute). A gnome with a Charisma score of at least 10 also has the following spell-like abilities: 1/day—dancing lights, ghost sound, prestidigitation. Caster level 1st; save DC 10 + gnome’s Cha modifier + spell level, favored class bard. Strength 10 (4) Dexterity 10 (2) Constitution 14 (4) Intelligence 10 (2) Wisdom 16 (10) Charisma 14 (6) Cleric 1: Healing domain, Sun domain, Turn Undead, Skill Focus (Heal), +4 ranks Heal, +4 ranks Knowledge (religion). Cleric 2: +1 rank Heal, +1 rank Knowledge (religion). Cleric 3: Brew Potion, +1 rank Heal, +1 rank Knowledge (religion). Cleric 4: +1 Wis, +1 rank Heal, +1 rank Knowledge (religion). Cleric 5: +1 rank Heal, +1 rank Knowledge (religion). Cleric 6: Self-Sufficient, +1 rank Heal, +1 rank Knowledge (religion). Cleric 7: +1 rank Heal, +1 rank Knowledge (religion). Cleric 8: +1 Wis, +1 rank Heal, +1 rank Knowledge (religion). Cleric 9: Leadership, +1 rank Heal, +1 rank Knowledge (religion). Cleric 10: +1 rank Heal, +1 rank Knowledge (religion). Cleric 11: +1 rank Heal, +1 rank Knowledge (religion). Cleric 12: Scribe Scroll, +1 Wis, +1 rank Heal, +1 rank Knowledge (religion). Cohort Sir Cassius Bastion Paladin 10 Medium Humanoid (Human) Hit Dice: 10d10+20 (79 hp) Initiative: +0 Speed: 30 ft, 20 ft in armor. Armor Class: 21 (+9 full plate, +2 shield), touch 10, flatfooted 21 Base Attack/Grapple: +10/+13 Attack: +2 bastard sword +16 melee (1d10+5/19-20) Full Attack: +2 bastard sword +16/+11 melee (1d10+5/19-20) Space/Reach: 5 ft./5 ft. Special Attacks: Smite evil 3/day, turn undead, Special Qualities: Aura of good, detect evil, divine grace, lay on hands, aura of courage, divine health, special mount, remove disease 2/week Saves: Fort +14, Ref +8, Will +10 Abilities: Str 17 (+3 levels), Dex 10, Con 14, Int 10, Wis 14, Cha 14 Skill Ranks: Handle Animal 13, Ride 13, Sense Motive 13, Skill Modifiers: Handle Animal +15, Ride +13, Sense Motive +15, Feats: Exotic Weapon Proficiency (bastard sword), Weapon Focus (bastard sword), Mounted Combat, Ride-By Attack, Spirited Charge Spells Normally Prepared: (2/2) 1 – bless weapon, divine favor, 2 – bull’s strength, eagle’s splendor. Environment: Any Organization: Group (with Wellford and his followers) Challenge Rating: 10 Treasure: +2 bastard sword (8,335 gp), +1 mithral full plate (11,500 gp), silver holy symbol of Heironeous (25 gp), heavy mithral shield (1,020 gp), scabbard of keen edges (16,000 gp), cloak of resistance +3 (9,000 gp), 10 potions of cure moderate wounds (3,000 gp), spare money (120 gp) Alignment: Lawful Good Languages: Common Advancement: By character class Level Adjustment: +0 Cassius is a 28-year old human paladin of Heironeous. He is bald and clean-shaven, as he believes that grooming hair is a needless luxury. His equipment is well-kept but not ornate. He was raised to believe in the nobility of war and combat, and took those beliefs with him when he was called to serve Heironeous. He joined a paladin strike force led by Sir Kilkillian and killed many evil-doers with his trusty blade. After he met the gnome cleric Wellford he began to re-evaluate his reasons for killing evil. He realized that saving people was an equally noble endeavor and began to sympathize with those who could not or would not take up arms. After the Scowling Prince incident, he decided to follow Wellford and aid him with his strength at arms. Gavinson, Bastion’s special mount Large Magical Beast Hit Dice: 7d8+21 (52 hp) Initiative: +1 Speed: 70 ft. (14 squares) Armor Class: 20 (–1 size, +1 Dex, +10 natural), touch 10, flat-footed 19 Base Attack/Grapple: +5/+13 Attack: Hoof +7 melee (1d6+3) Full Attack: 2 hooves +7 melee (1d6+4) and bite +2 melee (1d3+2) Space/Reach: 10 ft./5 ft. Special Attacks: — Special Qualities: Low-light vision, scent, empathic link, improved evasion, share spells, share saving throws, improved speed Saves: Fort +8, Ref +6, Will +3 Abilities: Str 18, Dex 13, Con 17, Int 7, Wis 13, Cha 6 Skills: Listen +7, Spot +7 Feats: Endurance, Run, Improved Natural Attack (hoof) Environment: Temperate plains Organization: Domesticated Challenge Rating: ? Advancement: — Level Adjustment: — Gavinson is Sir Cassius Bastion’s mount from the celestial realms. He rarely sees action as Wellford prefers to travel on foot, and Bastion does not feel comfortable riding a mount when his master is not. Followers Following his good work for the church, the church of Pelor assigned a number of staff to support Wellford. He also gained other followers from his incessant wanderings. They currently consist of 15 general staff (10 x human adept 1, 4 x human expert 1, 1 x dwarf expert 1) and 1 guard (human warrior 2) to watch them. Wellford began life as a simple gnome living in a gnomish village. His parents were both tinkerers, and would have taught him their craft had fate not intervened. When Wellford was eleven, a kobold horde came upon his village without warning. The gnome warriors put up a brave fight, but were outnumbered a dozen to one. The gnome civilians holed up in the village hall, which was well-fortified. The kobolds however were determined to exterminate the village, so they began to hack away at the ancient structure. Just as the picks of the kobolds began to pierce the walls, a great battle cry was heard by all. Warriors of the church of Pelor had been keeping tabs on the kobold horde and had arrived in force to put an end to them. The battle was fierce, with many faithful of Pelor killed, but the toll on the kobolds was greater still. As the sun rose the next day, the last of the kobolds were routed. Almost all the gnomish warriors had been killed, so the church of Pelor stationed some of it’s armed warriors in the village as the gnomes rebuilt. Unfortunately for Wellford, his parents had been caught unawares by the kobolds and were killed in their workshop. Having known no bloodshed until that day, the trauma threatened to break the sanity of the young gnome. Seeing his sadness a priest of Pelor by the name of Garret comforted the young gnome and told him that his parents were now with the gods of the gnomes. Wellford was angry at this, claiming that the gods of the gnomes failed to protect his village. He then asked the priest to teach him the ways of Pelor. Unsure of what to do, Garret asked the gnome elders if such a thing was permissible. Because Wellford had not stopped crying until Garret spoke to him, the elders agreed to let Wellford go. Wellford then joined the church of Pelor, becoming a cleric of the sun deity. The path was long and hard, but Wellford was determined to succeed. Believing that he and his village were saved by Pelor, Wellford embarked on a life of helping others as a servant of Pelor. He learned the healing arts and joined the more mobile arm of the church, visiting plague-infested villages and war-torn lands with his superiors. He was less of an evangelist than his peers, but his skill at healing advanced him quickly through the ranks of the healers. He knew that his chances of running a temple were small if he continued in this way, but he cared not. As the years went by Wellford was sent further and further away from the temple, most of the time at his own request. There were always sick and injured people to tend to, and the gnome wanted to be there. His earlier trauma from the kobold attack was still strong, however. He would heal injured soldiers, and even killed enemies who threatened his charges, but spoke out against unnecessary conflict when he could. However, his lack of interpersonal skills meant that he achieved little success in resolving disputes peacefully. One day as he returned to the temple from a long journey, he noticed that the healer’s quarters was nearly empty. Asking the priest, he found out that the healers were sent to an allied city to aid in their battle with a demon cult. Despite having just returned from a long journey, Wellford immediately set out to the besieged city. He arrived late in the evening, as the cultists and their demon allies were overrunning one of the towers. At the healer’s tent, Wellford tended to the wounds of the injured soldiers, then went out into the streets. The scenes were reminiscent of the kobold raid on his village, except the corpses were a bit bigger. Burning out all his wands, scrolls, and spells quickly, the gnome had to resort to mundane techniques. The survivors in the streets were bandaged with cloth, splints created with broken wood, open wounds cauterized with torches, until the gnome reached the contested tower. A strike force consisting of paladins loyal to Heironeous were fighting with the demons who had been summoned to aid the cult. The bodies of cultist warriors lay broken all around the tower. The paladins were outnumbered five to one, and more demons seemed to appear as quickly as the paladins could kill them. Thinking quickly, Wellford surmised that someone must be summoning the demons into the tower. Skirting around the tower, he found a cloaked figure behind a broken wagon. The figure than proceeded to summon a demon right in front of his eyes. The demon immediately leapt into the tower, knocking down one of the paladins. His spells exhausted, the cleric gripped the handle of his morningstar and swallowed nervously. He tried to sneak around to get behind the summoner, but the sound of his armor shifting alerted the other spellcaster. The cultist prepared to launch a spell at the gnome, but Wellford ducked behind a ruined house. Blasts of arcane energy tore through the surroundings, but none struck the diminutive cleric. While the cultist spellcaster was distracted by the gnome, the paladins in the tower gained the upper hand and finished the last of the demons. One of the paladins, a young human by the name of Cassius Bastion, looked over the balcony and saw the one-sided battle between the gnome and the cultist. Invoking the name of the Archpaladin, he leapt from the balcony, fell many floors, and landed on the surprised cultist. Frustrated by the little gnome, the cultist was not aware of this until said paladin landed on him, killing him instantly. By the grace of Heironeous, the paladin survived, but barely. Wellford quickly ran over and tended to the fallen warrior. The gnome removed the human’s armor, some of which had dented inwards and pierced his flesh when he fell. Improvising from the wreckage, the gnome patched up Bastion and stayed with him until the next day, when fresh clerics arrived from the healer’s tent. By the time Bastion was ready to fight again, the battle was over. The cultist he fell upon was one of the lieutenants of the cult, and his death dealt a critical blow to the cult’s morale. Even though he had not regained his spells, Wellford still tried to help, searching for the wounded, treating those that he could and marking those who needed divine healing. Bastion was impressed by the cleric’s dedication and aided him in his search. As the two searched the city together, they slowly got to know each other. Bastion viewed life as an unending battle against evil, whereas Wellford saw only people to help and suffering to be prevented. Once they had finished searching the entire city and the rebuilding began, the two were prepared to part ways. As they were about to, the commander of Bastion’s strike force, Sir Kilkillian, asked the gnome if he would like to join their small party. At first Wellford was unsure, but Bastion convinced him that with the strike force he would be able to go even further, to places which would normally be to dangerous for a lone cleric of Pelor. Hearing this, Wellford agreed and became the party’s healer. The group traveled for a year together, encountering many servants of evil and healing the wounded where they could. Wellford encountered many things for the first time, such as evil dragons and devils. He was always defended by the paladins, so he grew to trust them. Bastion advanced through the ranks quickly, becoming Sir Bastion in short order. However, Wellford came to the conclusion that he was spending more time healing the strike force and fighting monsters than he was treating the general populace. He discussed the matter with Sir Kilkillian, who conceded that Wellford was not achieving his personal goals with the strike force. They stopped at a friendly city and reluctantly parted ways with the cleric. In the city Wellford found a temple of Pelor and worked there as a healer, resuming his duties as a wandering cleric. As the years went by, he became known for his good works far and wide, and news of his deeds reached the highest levels of the church hierarchy. What impressed them the most was his lack of interest in gaining personal power. His seniority alone should have given him leadership of a temple, but he continued on his mission of healing. The people in the places he visited remembered him, even more so because he was a gnome. Deciding that he was a good way to spread the faith, the high priests of Pelor decided to support him. When he returned to the temple, he found a half-dozen adepts of Pelor waiting for him. They had been ordered by the church to aid him in his work. Encouraged by this, Wellford continued forwards into war-torn lands, and the people knew his group as the “blessed seven”. Things were progressing as normal, until the blessed seven stumbled across the path of the Scowling Prince. The Scowling Prince was a being of unknown origins who had amassed a following among the most brutal and cruel warriors of the time. His armies razed temples and schools of magic, and replaced existing governments with his hand-picked warlords. As a cleric of Pelor, Wellford had unwittingly placed himself in mortal danger when he crossed into the Scowling Prince’s domain. He and his group were immediately hunted down by the Scowling Prince’s agents, and he had to defend himself accordingly. In those dark times the gnome killed more people than he would have liked, calling down the wrath of Pelor to smite his foes. His resistance, as well as his healing work, made him a celebrity among the various resistance movements. He was stealthily invited to a resistance meeting, and was shocked by what he saw. Everyone was there; followers of good, evil, and neutral gods stood side-by-side with deposed princes, druids whose sacred places were burned down, and outlawed wizards. They looked to Wellford for guidance, as their superiors were all killed in the purges. Uncomfortable with his new role, he searched for a warrior to help him run the martial side of things. To his relief and joy, he spotted Sir Cassius Bastion at the back of the resistance meeting. The paladin was in the area when the Scowling Prince’s armies had moved in, and had been waiting for a chance to strike. Together the two rallied the people of the region to fight against the Scowling Prince’s warlords. Plans were drawn and preparations made; the resistance led by Wellford was ready to strike at the Scowling Prince’s warlords. The first blow was struck by the druids, who caused havoc in occupied towns and cities with their animal allies. Then the wizards used their magic to annihilate the fortifications as well as strike at the Scowling Prince’s troops. Then the resistance warriors led by Sir Cassius Bastion attacked the enemy’s stronghold supported by the clerics including Wellford. Wellford’s insurrection lasted for over a month, as the Scowling Prince sent troops from other areas to win back the stronghold. The battle was then brought to a convincing end as various knightly orders and wizard institutions from outside sent forces to crush the Scowling Prince’s forces. Bastion himself took down the warlord’s standard and Wellford called down the wrath of Pelor upon the warlord who tried to escape. Following the successful battle, a campaign was mounted to push back the Scowling Prince’s forces throughout the land. Wellford continued his work, followed by Sir Cassius Bastion who was convinced that his duty lay in serving the gnome cleric. The pair, supported by other followers of Pelor as well as those who were aided by Wellford, now continues to search for people to help, whether by bandage or by blade.
Mercurius 02-16-07, 11:25 PM	Just like you wouldn't advance a familiar's abilities for taking an arcane-spellcasting PrC. Anyway, three entries already! This looks set for some record-breaking! Actually, by a strict interpretation of the rules, the Psicrystal progresses fully. There seems to be some familiar-related artifacts gumming up the works in the PrC descriptions. Psicrystal abilities are based on the owner's levels in psionic classes. Levels from other classes do not count toward the owner's level for purposes of psicrystal abilities. Despite the language in many of the Prestige classes throughout the book that claim that psicrystals don't advance due to the manifester level progression, it simply doesn't matter because a psicrystal does not advance based on manifester level. It advances based upon the character's levels in psionic classes, which includes any class that progresses manifester levels (as well as the soulknife, which has no manifester levels at all). Therefore, every level in Slayer progresses one's psicrystal, just like levels in Psychic Warrior, Psion, Wilder, or Soulknife. This seems to be only fair, since it costs a psionic character a precious feat slot, rather than being automatic. In addition, this is the ruling that the Psionics board almost unanimously agrees upon, and they've been doing this stuff like crazy for a long time. Therefore, though it's up to other judges exactly what they'll do, I'll say flat out that, in my opinion (having considered the rules very carefully and having asked on the Psi boards and listening to many very well spoken proponents of the ruling), that psicrystals advance with levels in psionic classes, as per the rules explicitly stated in the Psicrystal section of the XPH and the SRD
TheChilliGod 02-16-07, 11:40 PM	Actually, by a strict interpretation *Snip* explicitly stated in the Psicrystal section of the XPH and the SRD... Yeah, well... :help: ... I can explain... ... *Runs away*
Mercurius 02-17-07, 09:29 AM	Hey, it threw me too, for a while. I think it's just a bit of a Copy-and-paste error from arcane and divine spellcasting progressions, or just designers forgetting how Psicrystals are described as working. *shrug*
Zherog 02-17-07, 11:05 AM	List updated! 37 posts, 4 entries? Awesome!
Zherog 02-17-07, 11:17 AM	So this is what happens when I forget to check the thread for a while....but Mercurius read past that point last time I was reading over his shoulder and didn't mention it...hmmm..... Oh, and Zherog, I'd like to point out: you used said smiley to me first. :smirk: Should I've used this smilie instead: :love: :devil:
Far_Traveler 02-17-07, 07:18 PM	I hope my entry would be judged to be better then my other works... when it's finished.
DarkKitsune 02-17-07, 08:34 PM	List updated! 37 posts, 4 entries? Awesome! Heh. We're on the ball this time :)
Mercurius 02-17-07, 11:54 PM	Should I've used this smilie instead: :love: :devil: :ahem: Are you hitting on my fiancee? :waits:
Zherog 02-18-07, 12:09 AM	Hitting on? Nah - I'm married, she's engaged, you can probably beat the crap outta me... :D "Having fun" is a better phrase. :)
JasonOrlandoHawk 02-19-07, 02:55 PM	Should I've used this smilie instead :love: :uh-huh: :ahem: Are you hitting on my fiancee? :waits: :nonono: Children, children... :teach: Can you not get through one Hero Craftsman competition w/o me being here to chaperone? If you all can't play nice, I'll make you sit in the corner, and no one will have recess. Keep this up, and I might even make you start judging on time! Oh yeah... :bump:
Zherog 02-19-07, 03:22 PM	Children, children... You really shouldn't insult children by comparing me to them. :D
Far_Traveler 02-20-07, 01:47 PM	You really shouldn't insult children by comparing me to them. :D Yeah... :weep: :bump:
JasonOrlandoHawk 02-20-07, 03:40 PM	I would like to extend my sincere apologies for my earlier comments, comparing a group of irresponsible, whining, tempermental, short-sighted, and fussy brats to children. ;) I realize now that my comments may have been very insulting to any children actually reading this thread, and I am very, very sorry for any emotional anguish my comments may have caused. I understand that the judges of this competition are truly not, nor could they ever be, as mature as 1st graders. I promise not to make such a drastic error again. But you have to admit... It's a lot of fun to tell the judges to go sit in the corner! :cool:
Zherog 02-20-07, 03:53 PM	We'll see who's having fun when your score is announced! :P :P
Far_Traveler 02-20-07, 07:27 PM	This thread is fun. You guys are great... :pint:
Avalon® 02-20-07, 09:31 PM	Actually, by a strict interpretation of the rules, the Psicrystal progresses fully. There seems to be some familiar-related artifacts gumming up the works in the PrC descriptions. Despite the language in many of the Prestige classes throughout the book that claim that psicrystals don't advance due to the manifester level progression, it simply doesn't matter because a psicrystal does not advance based on manifester level. It advances based upon the character's levels in psionic classes, which includes any class that progresses manifester levels (as well as the soulknife, which has no manifester levels at all). Therefore, every level in Slayer progresses one's psicrystal, just like levels in Psychic Warrior, Psion, Wilder, or Soulknife. This seems to be only fair, since it costs a psionic character a precious feat slot, rather than being automatic. In addition, this is the ruling that the Psionics board almost unanimously agrees upon, and they've been doing this stuff like crazy for a long time. Therefore, though it's up to other judges exactly what they'll do, I'll say flat out that, in my opinion (having considered the rules very carefully and having asked on the Psi boards and listening to many very well spoken proponents of the ruling), that psicrystals advance with levels in psionic classes, as per the rules explicitly stated in the Psicrystal section of the XPH and the SRD So is this the general consensus here about this topic?
JasonOrlandoHawk 02-20-07, 10:47 PM	We'll see who's having fun when your score is announced! :P :P Probably whoever beats me out for first place... Still, I have to wonder if a judge just threatened me. Surely, one of the judges would never do something as immature and childish as that!!! Wait, never mind... I just realized we already discovered that the judges are far worse than that. :P If I want to score above last place, I had better get busy trying to bribe the judges to bump my score. So, who's most susceptible to Little Debbie Snack Cakes (b/c my cooking could never be mistaken for a bribe)? On a side note, Mercurius, I'm very sorry that you've gotten caught up in such a disreputable group like the HC judges. I really should've warned you about the dangers of getting involved w/ such hooligans. (Of course, what does that say about me...? Any smart comments, and I will make you sit in the corner!!!)
Far_Traveler 02-20-07, 10:48 PM	Sounds like it. Man, is it just me but is psionics the thing to have when it comes to sidekicks? My sidekick is a bloody soulknife! Edit: this was not in response to Jason's post, see the post above that. As for who gets first place, well, I actually may have a shot! I am working on this thing Painstakingly I swear! There will be no mistakes!
jennibert 02-20-07, 10:52 PM	So is this the general consensus here about this topic? Well, for my part, most of what I know about psionics is what Mercurius tells me anyway, so...I can't speak for Zherog, but works for me.... And, Mr. Hawk, if I'm really really really good, can I still go to recess? I'll give you a :cookie:! :angel: As for my own bribes....only if you can find lowfat snack cakes. Wouldn't want to ruin my diet. (Because the king cake I had for breakfast this morning has already done that.....)
edwardsobel 02-20-07, 11:08 PM	Hi all I really dont want to open a whole psionics debate but there was a time in the past when every time something in the books was worded to not favor some point of view they claimed the infamous "cut and paste error" but as for using a precious feat dont psions also get a bonus feat at level 1? the whole psycrystal thing is just about the only thing I hate about psionics, everything else is pretty cool and I dont mind them. its just that psicrystal rules are so vague and open to to many varying interpretations. for this particular contest I think the judges need to lock down exactly how to interpret the rules on the crystals and then make them known. BTW I am finalizing my character for this contest, just need to expand the story some to give the sidekick more "air time" in the story. also how to explain the magic item my character has.
Mercurius 02-21-07, 09:32 AM	Hi all I really dont want to open a whole psionics debate but there was a time in the past when every time something in the books was worded to not favor some point of view they claimed the infamous "cut and paste error" but as for using a precious feat dont psions also get a bonus feat at level 1? the whole psycrystal thing is just about the only thing I hate about psionics, everything else is pretty cool and I dont mind them. its just that psicrystal rules are so vague and open to to many varying interpretations. for this particular contest I think the judges need to lock down exactly how to interpret the rules on the crystals and then make them known. You're quite right, in that we need to be precise. Which is why I was. I stated my position, and provided direct rules quotes to back it up. While Psions do gain a bonus feat at first level, Wizards gain a familiar and Scribe Scroll at the same time. Just because they get a bonus feat doesn't mean that they're somehow better off than the wizard. Psicrystals are useful, but wilders, soulknives, and psychic warriors can all get them too... with the expenditure of a feat. The fact that Soulknives can take them, even though they have no manifester level at all, should be an additional indication that psicrystals advance independently of manifester level. As for psionics being the way to go, that's just because the psionics rules are much cooler than the standard magic rules. ;) :P
Zherog 02-21-07, 11:37 AM	So is this the general consensus here about this topic? I'm frankly not sure what the intended rules are supposed to be. Mercurius's quotes are fine and good. And he has a good argument. But it's still conjecture. Given that that's the case, I'm likely to be flexible when determining the rules score for somebody in that situation. That is, I might mention it but it's not likely to cost you points either way. This is the sort of thing that begs for a FAQ ruling.
Mercurius 02-21-07, 08:07 PM	This is the sort of thing that begs for a FAQ ruling. There are a couple of things regarding Psicrystals that need FAQ attention, but WotC has been pretty silent on the entire subject of Psionics. If one frequents the Psi boards enough, one will certainly hear the lamentations of WotC mistreatment that many of them feel is a given.
Comus 02-21-07, 11:15 PM	Potentially could we make a character who IS a sidekick instead? I might have missed if this was answered - if it wasn't, I repost the question in hopes of an answer before starting on a potential entry. I'm thinking of writing up a character who is a sidekick who has come to replace her master, without anyone knowing, and I'd like to know if that'd fit the theme.
Far_Traveler 02-22-07, 08:31 AM	The fact that Soulknives can take them, even though they have no manifester level at all, should be an additional indication that psicrystals advance independently of manifester level. No, no they can't. Psicrystal Affinity [Psionic] You have created a psicrystal. Prerequisites: Manifester level 1st. Benefit: This feat allows you to gain a psicrystal.
Zherog 02-22-07, 08:57 AM	I might have missed if this was answered - if it wasn't, I repost the question in hopes of an answer before starting on a potential entry. I'm thinking of writing up a character who is a sidekick who has come to replace her master, without anyone knowing, and I'd like to know if that'd fit the theme. If you think the character fits the concept, then go for it. It's your responsibility, though, for your background and stats to prove to the judges how it fits the intentionally loose requirement.
Mercurius 02-22-07, 09:06 AM	No, no they can't. Ah, and here I clearly missed that. I stand corrected on that point. Thanks.
Far_Traveler 02-22-07, 01:06 PM	Ah, and here I clearly missed that. I stand corrected on that point. Thanks. No problem, My sidekick is a soulknife and I kind of wanted a psicrystal to fit with his concept... I was disappointed. Ah well, He can do just fine with what he has.
wrecan 02-22-07, 01:38 PM	My first entry to the Hero Craftsman contest! Be gentle, but comments are welcome! Description of Mikolos and Ferros They are a strange sight to behold indeed. A rust monster, as large as a horse, fitted in a fine suit of leather armor, and yet acting as a tame as a pony. One could even swear it purrs when its rider stokes its eyestalks. Atop this monstrosity sits a handsome man. At first glance, one might mistake him for an elf or half-elf. He sports dusty blond hair and bright blue eyes. He wears a stylish rust-colored vest over his workman’s shirt, with heavy leather riding gloves, yellowish fur-lined breeches and a rust-colored cloak. Hanging from his belt are a rust-colored satchel, sack and belt pouch as well as an ivory quiver, though no bow is seen. Slung over his back is an enormous cudgel of fine masterwork. He smiles at you rakishly from under his rusty wide-brimmed hat through his neatly trimmed goatee, and leans comfortably in the saddle, apparently unconcerned that he is sitting astride a feared abomination. It is only on further inspection that one notices the goat’s horns jutting from his forehead, and that he is wearing no pants, and those fur-lined breeches you thought you saw are actually goat’s legs. A nasty and old scar mars his hoofed left leg. Why, that’s a satyr riding that rust monster! Personality Mikolos has a mercurial and rakish personality. He enjoys a good joke and loves nothing more than to laugh and to see new sights. If asked about his scar, he will likely invent an entertaining tale of adventure and mayhem. He never repeats the same tale, and he never tells the truth of that wound. (See the history below.) Although his behavior can be unpredictable, he is loyal, even to a fault, to those who treat him well, but no friendship could ever be as tight a bond as the one he shares with Ferros. Ferros is, surprisingly, a playful and inquisitive rust monster. Though it is well-trained not to eat any iron that Mikolos does not allow him to eat, it enjoys sniffing and sampling different iron alloys. It is also fiercely protective of Mikolos and if it ever perceives Mikolos is in danger, it will attempt to overrun the person, grapple it, and crush it under its aberrational weight. It has never seen another of its kind, and so it does not recognize that, deep down, it has an abiding loneliness. Since Mikolos hardly ever ventures underground any more, Ferros is unlikely to find companionship of its own species. History Mikolos was always unusual, even for a satyr. He was charismatic, even by satyr standards, and strong as well. His troop begged him to become a performer, even a bard, but Mikolos refused. He had no interest in prancing about. He was a spirit of nature, and it was nature that he loved. He spent much of his youth exploring their forest home, studying the animals, and conversing with the gnomes and elves, and even some rustic human druids who lived nearby, listening to their tales and legends. He particularly liked to hear the tales of the elven and gnomish adventurers who had left their forest homes for the dark dungeons and caverns beneath the world. He, too, longed for adventure, but his elders preferred the comforts of the forest. One day he was set upon by a soldier who had been told to investigate the satyrs who had been harassing merchants along the road. (His troop, actually, who would resort to banditry when hunting became scarce.) The soldier was prepared for satyrs, and armed with a cold iron sword. Mikolos was unprepared and entirely surprised when the sword easily bypassed his damage resistance. Mikolos immediately fled the scene, easily outrunning the soldier, but the incident scarred him, both literally and emotionally. Back home, his elders explained to him about the perils of cold iron and Mikolos was horrified. Then he remembered a tale of a creature that ate iron. He decided that he would become an adventurer, not a piper, to seek out this “rust monster.” He left his troop and became a guide to other adventurers passing through the forest. He pressed them for any information they had about the underworld, particularly aberrations. He quickly became an expert on the matter, becoming first a ranger, and then a Horizon Walker with matery over the underground environment. He signed on with an adventuring team that would be traveling deep underground, and he looked for any signs of rust monsters. After several months, and several more adventures, he and his companions found an enormous complex with rust monsters as large as oxen. Suddenly, his group was attacked, unprovoked, by one of the beasts. They slew it, only to discover that it had been protecting its newborn. Mikolos took the young orphaned monster and named it Ferros. Mikolos left his adventuring team and re-established himself in his old forest. There, he spent his days training and domesticating Ferros. This was no easy task, as Ferros grew quickly. But Mikolos had been training for this all his life. Mikolos taught Ferros how to serve as his steed. Their relationship was both loving and symbiotic. Mikolos saved Ferros from the dangerous world of the underground, and Ferros protected Mikolos from weapons of cold iron. Having decided that Ferros posed no threat to any iron-wearing companions with which they might travel, Mikolos and Ferros are ready to begin a new life of adventuring. They seek to explore the world (as any good Horizon Walker would). This poses some difficulties, as most adventuring parties with metal are hesitant to travel with a rust monster, and also are looking to travel underground, where the biggest treasures lie. But Mikolos is confident that the benefits of having such an unusual set of companions will find them a stout adventuring team soon. And then he will have adventures such that other satyrs could only envy! Stat Blocks MIKOLOS, Satyr Fey 5/Ranger 3/Horizon Walker 2 (ECL 12, inc’g +2 LA) Chaotic Neutral medium male fey (5’4”, 145 lbs.) Init +1; Senses; Low-light vision, darkvision 60 ft., Listen +10, Spot +14 Languages Common, Elven, Gnome, Sylvan ________________________________________ AC 21, touch 12, flat-footed 19 (+5 armor, +2 dex +4 natural armor) hp 55 (10d8+10) DR 5/cold iron Fort +8, Ref +9, Will +7 ________________________________________ Speed 40 ft. (8 squares) Attack Greatclub +11/+6 melee 1d10+5 and head butt +4 melee 1d6+2. or Composite longbow +8/+8/+3 (or +10 as standard action) ranged (1d8+4) Space 5 ft.; Reach 5 ft. Base Atk +7; Grp +9 ________________________________________ Abilities Str 15, Dex 14, Con 12, Int 16, Wis 14, Cha 18 SQ Favored Class (bard), Favored Enemy (aberration), terrain mastery (forest, underground), wild empathy Feats AlertnessB, EnduranceB, Mounted Archery, Mounted Combat, Power Attack, Rapid ShotB, TrackB, Trample Skills Handle Animal +17, Knowledge (dungeoneering) +9, Knowledge (geography) +16, Ride +16, Hide +17, Knowledge (nature) +12, Listen +14, Move Silently +13, Spot +14, Survival +15 ________________________________________ Possessions (cost/weight) Explorer's outfit, Leather armor +3 (9,160/15), Greatclub +2 (8,305/8), ioun stone (pale blue, +2 Str) (8,000/0), belt pouch (1/.5) [containing 19 pp, 33 gp, 12 sp and 10 cp (224.3/1.48)], bag of tricks (rust) (3000/.5), satchel (as backpack) (2/2) [containing 4 vials acid (40/4), 4 alchemist’s fire (80/4), 4 antitoxins (200/-), 4 vials holy water (100/4), 4 tanglefoot bags (200/16), 4 thunderstones(120/4), 20 tindertwigs (20/-), 10 oils of cure light wounds (500/10)], efficient quiver (2,500/2) [contains Oathbow (25,600/3), 60 arrows (3), wand of longstrider (750), wand of barkskin (4,500) and 18 two-pound, javelin-shaped iron bars (3.6)] Mikolos is considered a steed with a cost of 7,000 gp (cost of a griffon, which, like Ferros, is CR4). Survival synergies: Mikolos receives a +2 bonus to his Survival checks to track aberrations, to avoid hazards and getting lost, when underground, and in aboveground natural environments. Terrain Mastery: As a Horizon Walker, Mikolos has a +1 insight bonus on attack and damage rolls against creatures with a listed terrain of forest or underground. FERROS, trained advanced rust monster True Neutral large aberration Init +3; Senses; Darkvision 60 ft., scent, Listen +11, Spot +10 ________________________________________ AC 24, touch 12, flat-footed 21 (+5 armor, +3 dex +7 natural armor -1 size) hp 102 (12d8+48) Fort +8, Ref +7, Will +9 ________________________________________ Speed 40 ft. (8 squares) Melee Antennae touch +14 melee (rust) or bite +8 melee (1d4+2) Space 10 ft.; Reach 10 ft. Base Atk +9; Grp +17 Atk Options Rust ________________________________________ Abilities Str 20, Dex 16, Con 18, Int 2, Wis 13, Cha 8 Feats Ability Focus (Rust), Alertness, Combat Reflexes, Track, Weapon Focus (antennae) Skills Listen +11, Spot +10 Tricks Attack, come, down, seek, track, trample ________________________________________ Possessions (cost/weight) Bit and bridle (2/1), Exotic military saddle (60/40), Leather barding +3 (9,640/30), ioun stone (pale blue, +2 Str) (8,000/0), bedroll (.1/5), saddlebags (4/8) [containing winter blanket (.5/3), silk rope (10/5), tent (10/20), waterskin (1/4), one week’s trail rations (3.5/7)] Rust (Ex): If Ferros makes a successful touch attack with his antennae, he causes the target metal to corrode, falling to pieces and becoming useless immediately. The touch can destroy up to a 10-foot cube of metal instantly. Magic armor and weapons, and other magic items made of metal, must succeed on a DC 22 Reflex save (12 HD +4 Con +4 race +2 Ability Focus) or be dissolved. A metal weapon that deals damage to a rust monster corrodes immediately. Wooden, stone, and other nonmetallic weapons are unaffected. Strategies & Tactics Outdoors, Mikolos will try to prepare Ferros with longstrider and barkskin, and then himself with barkskin. As Ferros charges, Mikolos will pepper foes with arrows. He will then switch to his greatclub and direct Ferros to trample any foes wielding metal armor or weapons. Ferros will attempt to disintegrate them. When all metal items are destroyed, Mikolos will dismount and order Ferros to retreat to a safe distance as he finishes off any remaining threats. Design Notes This entry uses information only from the three core books. Ferros, it should be noted, is not an animal companion or cohort. Instead, Mikolos gained access to him the old-fashioned way: snatching him as a baby and domesticating him with a successful DC 32 Handle Animal check. It should also be noted that, with the pale blue ioun stone, Ferros is not encumbered, even when carrying Mikolos and all his equipment. Also note that the stats above do not account for Mikolos’ bonuses against aberrations as his favored enemies. Nor will Mikolos’ wild empathy ability work on Ferros.
Zherog 02-22-07, 03:38 PM	List updated! Welcome to the fun, wrecan! I'm disappointed, though, that there's no picture accompanying your entry. :P
wrecan 02-22-07, 04:12 PM	You find me a photo of a satyr riding a large rust monster!!!
Zherog 02-22-07, 05:45 PM	You're the Google Image-fu master, not me. :P
wrecan 02-22-07, 06:33 PM	:dancin: <-satyr :r: <-rust monster Ta-da!
JasonOrlandoHawk 02-22-07, 06:51 PM	Hey everyone! Thought I'd start up the practice of commenting on each other's characters. I'm staying out of mechanics since I'm not judging this go-a-round, and I don't feel like checking everything. Here's a few thoughts on what I've seen so far. I love the character description. You seem to have a real talent for describing how a character appears vividly. Well done! Also, Kaylee's (and Loki's) personality is very well developed. Classic Rogue and very well done! Some issues that I think might pop-up, however. From your story, you clearly took levels in Sorceror first, but it's not clear what came first in your stats. It might cause some trouble since, in some places, it seems like you advanced as a Rogue first. Adding a Level-by-Level might have aided your clarity. Also, Zherog especially may say that you really haven't earned Level 12 status. Your adventures would justify a level 6 (or so) character, but they may say your background doesn't match your stats. Luckily, you shouldn't have to worry about this (as much) since Chilli isn't judging. Some final compliments. I absolutely love Arcane Trickster! Despite my general dislike of Rogues, I think Impromptu Sneak Attack is the greatest special ability ever. Also, good job taking a Wand of Fireballs. Otherwise, your character would've had a serious combat handicap. When I read your character, for some reason, I kept thinking of the "Fluffy the Cat vs. Joe the Commoner" thread that was so popular a while back. Very hilarious material! While I'm not a fan of Psionics, you've pulled the character off well. The only issue that may arise is that you've only had your Thrall for one level, but he has factored into a major portion of your story. You've done more in one level's time, than in the rest of your backstory, which could hurt you on Thematic Creativity, Background, or both. I will say this, though... I'm seriously considering dropping this character into my current FRCS campaign as a possible encounter. I think this may be one of the more original concepts we've seen here. I will admit to two major disappointments for this character. First, I think this character is tailor-made to the "Radiant Servant of Pelor" PrC from Complete Divine. However, if memory serves me correctly, you don't have that book do you? Oh well, you still did the character well. Also, you created a gnome w/ no nicknames? That's the #1 reason to play a gnome! Have fun w/ the nicknames! Still, you have a well developed ally, and backstory, so the lack of a good nickname can be forgiven. I really like you spell selection. You have an excellent support caster build. Some issues that might show up, however, are the general lack of mundane gear (Cleric's robes, healer's kits, and... not much else) and the lack of detail for your Turn Undead ability. Since you took the Sun Domain, you should probably detail out your Turning checks so that the information is readily available. Also, this portion of your background seemed a little too vague. Did you actually defeat the Scowling Prince, or just one of his minions? Hey! Welcome to Hero Craftsman! Excellent first entry! Very creative way to get a sidekick! Of course, like Zherog, I am curious to find out if you will find a picture of your submission... Anyways, Horizon Walker is one of my favorite PrC's, so good pick. I even like the fact that you went w/ a non-standard race. Very creative entry all around. I can see a few possible problems for you. While your entry was very concise (and as a member of the eligible judges, that is an important issue), I think it may have been too concise. A Level-by-Level breakdown, at least for your skills, would be a lot easier to check than the (fey ranks+class ranks+ etc...) format that you included. As it is, the judges will probably have a rough time backing into your skills. Also, your background may suffer a bit. Like I mentioned for Kaylee, while your background is interesting, I don't necessarily think that it qualifies you for more than a few levels. Also, some of the judges, particularly Zherog, may be disappointed that you didn't really develop any strong antagonists for this character. Still, excellent entry! Anyone care to comment on my character? What do you think of Araithor? He came out differently than I hoped, so I'm not sure what I think. Judges, if you're good, I might let you take a peek after you finish scoring. :cool:
JasonOrlandoHawk 02-22-07, 07:07 PM	Personally, I would've gone with... :devil: :turkey:
Heros_Backpack 02-22-07, 07:25 PM	Thanks, Jason. Zeek, Cat Burglar The only issue that may arise is that you've only had your Thrall for one level, but he has factored into a major portion of your story. You've done more in one level's time, than in the rest of your backstory, which could hurt you on Thematic Creativity, Background, or both. If you take a quick peek at the level breakdown, you'll see Zeek got his Thrall at lvl 9 - so he's had him for a third of his background. I will say this, though... I'm seriously considering dropping this character into my current FRCS campaign as a possible encounter. I think this may be one of the more original concepts we've seen here. :blush: Feel free.
Zherog 02-22-07, 08:52 PM	Judges, if you're good, I might let you take a peek after you finish scoring. I think we've already determined I'm not good. The only question, really, is whether I'm neutral or evil. :D
JasonOrlandoHawk 02-22-07, 09:55 PM	Time to cast Magic Circle Against Evil over the private comments... Wait, that might prevent others from reading my comments, even if they aren't judges... How? How can I prevent Zherog from reading the private contestant conversations w/o interrupting another contestant's ability to read the same? For absolutely no reason at all, I recommend that all individuals other than Zherog not read the information contained in the next sblock... Trigger Hypnotic Pattern Trap! You want to read this sblock! This sblock is fascinating! Just keep reading this sblock! So, anyways, jennibert & Mercurius... how's judging going? :cool: Oh yeah... Heros_Backpack, I stand corrected. I guess it goes to show how little attention I pay to most Level-by-Level breakdowns that contestants give me.
wrecan 02-22-07, 10:01 PM	Mikolos and Ferros Hey! Welcome to Hero Craftsman! Excellent first entry! Very creative way to get a sidekick! Of course, like Zherog, I am curious to find out if you will find a picture of your submission... Anyways, Horizon Walker is one of my favorite PrC's, so good pick. I even like the fact that you went w/ a non-standard race. Very creative entry all around. I can see a few possible problems for you. While your entry was very concise (and as a member of the eligible judges, that is an important issue), I think it may have been too concise. A Level-by-Level breakdown, at least for your skills, would be a lot easier to check than the (fey ranks+class ranks+ etc...) format that you included. As it is, the judges will probably have a rough time backing into your skills. Also, your background may suffer a bit. Like I mentioned for Kaylee, while your background is interesting, I don't necessarily think that it qualifies you for more than a few levels. Also, some of the judges, particularly Zherog, may be disappointed that you didn't really develop any strong antagonists for this character. Still, excellent entry! Thanks for the kind words. Horizon Walker is my favorite PRC too. I've used it twice now in various contests. This is also my second Satyr-entry. I'll sort of take your comments in order: Having just judged a NPC entry, I really went for being concise on stat blocks and his history. I tell you, after four NPC stat blocks, your eyes start to blur :twitch: I hope it's not too confusing. I didn't realize I was supposed to include enemies. I thought we were just creating a potential PC-hero with some plot hooks. I figured "wants to see the world", "has a pet dying of loneliness" and "deathly afraid of cold iron... even more than other fey" was plenty. I'll keep that in mind for the future.
Zherog 02-23-07, 11:45 AM	:rofl: I can't wait to read these private comments after judging. I'm sorry I started this trend...
DarkKitsune 02-23-07, 12:29 PM	I feel like we're passing notes in class... >.> Actually, Kaylee took Rogue first - she gained a level in it prior to being shipped off to school, due to her escapades at home. Level-by-level would have been useful here; I'll add it to the list of things to consider next time around :).
JasonOrlandoHawk 02-24-07, 10:36 AM	Isn't it sad that the professional educator in this group is one of the people passing notes? Well, this competition is to create an actual PC, and the judges tend to look at it from the perspective of a DM. One item that DM's tend to enjoy is a good, ready-made villain for the PC. Zherog, especially, is always looking for a good villain. Part of his reasoning is that, by 12th level, you really should have enemies. Still, I understand the urge to be concise. If you get a chance, look up the Hero Craftsman I hosted, HC#5: The Year of the Dragons. Not only did we have the highest number of submissions, we also had the longest (overall) submissions this contest has seen. If I hadn't found a good burst of energy, I'd likely still be judging those entries. :twitch: Will we get more submissions over the weekend, I wonder? I was really hoping for more competitors. :bump:
Zherog 02-24-07, 10:36 AM	Bit over two days left to get your character and sidekick in.
Far_Traveler 02-24-07, 12:50 PM	Mendalyn Ent'Sur the Betrayed True Neutral Drow Enchantress 10 Age: 120 (she's actually 147, but don't tell her I told you that) You see a drow before you. She wears clothes that scream wealth, with a spiderweb motif befitting one of the servants of Llolth. On her lap is a ebony rabbit, with bloodstains on it's paws. Beside her is another, male drow, wearing light chainmail but without a weapon. He glowers at you as the Female addresses you: "I can see you have seen a battle or two, how about this: I tell you the location of some hidden treasure that I cannot retrieve myself, and you give me forty percent. I shall accompany you, as shall my retainer, to ensure my share and it's retrieval in the first place. Do we have a deal?" Stats: Str 10 (2 points) Dex 10 (0 points, +2 racial) Con 12 (4 points, -2 racial, +2 belt) Int 26 (16 points, +2 racial, +2 level, +4 headband) Wis 10 (2 points) Cha 14 (4 points, +2 racial) HP 52 Initiative: +0 Darkvision 120 ft, Light Blindness AC: 10 + 0 Dex + 2 deflection + 2 armor = 14, touch 12 flat-footed 14 BaB/Grapple: +5/+5 Saves: +7 Fort, +6 Ref, +10 Will (3/3/7 base, 1/0/0 ability, 3/3/3 cloak) Conditional saves: +2 Will against spells or spell-like abilities, another +2 Will if enchantment, Immune to sleep effect, +2 against Spider Poison, Immune to Web effects Spell resistance 21 Languages: Common, Elven, Undercommon, Drow Sign Language, Draconic, Abyssal, Gnome, Goblin Magical abilities (race and items alike), as well as constant effects Spider Climb, Can move in webs at half speed Web 1/day, DC 13 Faerie Fire 1/day Darkness 1/day Dancing Lights 1/day Charm Person (1 charge from staff), DC 21 Charm Monster (2 charges from staff) DC 24 Mage Hand Feats and Features: Scribe Scroll Spell Focus (Enchantment) Greater Spell Focus (Enchantment) Spell Penetration Leadership (Score: 13, 10 level +2 cha mod +1 special power (enchantments), -2 familiar, +2 Great Renown (among drow), +2 for stronghold (only applies to followers)) Craft Wondrous Item Spell Mastery (Suggestion, Teleport, Dominate Person, Charm Monster, Scrying, Polymorph, Read Magic) (Note: All wizards get automatic mastery over read magic) Familiar: Black Bunny ‘Yinvezz’ Drow/Wizard Proficiencies (Hand Crossbow, Short Sword, Rapier, Quarterstaff, Club, Dagger, Heavy Crossbow, Light Crossbow) Skills: 7x10 + 8x3 = 94 points Spellcraft: +18 (10 ranks, +8 modifier) Knowledge (Arcana): +18 (10 ranks, +8 modifier) Concentration: +11 (10 ranks, +1 modifier) Knowledge (The Planes): +18 (10 ranks, +8 modifier) Knowledge (Local): +18 (10 ranks, +8 modifier) Knowledge (Religion): +18 (10 ranks, +8 modifier) Knowledge (Nature): +18 (10 ranks, +8 modifier) Knowledge (Dungeoneering): +11 (3 ranks, +8 modifier) Spot: +2 (+2 racial, +0 modifier) +2 when familiar is within 5 ft Listen: +5 (+2 racial, +0 modifier, +3 familiar modifier), +2 when familiar is within 5 ft Search: +10 (+2 racial, +8 modifier) (NOTES: I get an additional skill point for levels 8, 9, and 10 due to an intelligence increase) Spells: 4/6/6/4/4/3, +1 enchantment per level*, Prohibited schools: Evocation and Abjuration Typically Prepared Spells 0th: Arcane Mark, Prestidigitation, Ghost Sound, Message, Daze* 1st: Charm Person*, Silent Image, Expeditious retreat, Feather Fall, Ray of Enfeeblement, Unseen Servant, Animate Rope 2nd: Touch of Idiocy*, Alter Self, Ghoul Touch, Spectral Hand, Rope Trick, Mirror Image, Locate Object 3rd: Heroism, Suggestion*, Fly, Hold Person, Arcane Sight 4th: Charm Monster*, Scrying, Arcane Eye, Polymorph, Greater invisibility 5th: Dominate Person*, Feeblemind, Hold Monster, Teleport Items (Scrolls and Wondrous Items at 75% cost if able to craft): Blessed Book as Spellbook (9.375) Scrying Mirror (1,000) Ring: Protection +2 and Sustenance (10,500) Headband of Intellect +4 (12,000) Cloak of Resistance +3 (6,750) Bracers of Armor +2 (3,000) Belt of Health +2 (3,000) Hand of the Mage (675) (decorated to look like a spider) Bag of Holding Type III (7,400) Robe of Arachnida (10,500) Staff of Charming (50 charges) (16,500) Scroll of disguise self x4 (75) Scroll of endure elements x4 (75) Scroll of Bulls Strength x2 and Bears endurance x2 (450) Scroll of darkness x2 (225) Scroll of Modrenkainen’s Lubrication (1650) 16 potions of cure light wounds (800) 4 cure moderate wounds potions (1200) 2 Cure serious wounds potion (1500) 400ft of Silken Rope (80) Spell Component Pouch (5) 100 candles (1) 10 pieces of chalk (0.1) 10 vials of ink and 20 inkpens (82) Journal (15) (contains maps to many hidden treasures of not only Ent'Sur legacy, but some other houses) Magnifying glass and hourglass (125) Nobles clothes (75) (specifically adjusted to mix in the robe of arachnida, bare skin without robe, all the rage among drow nobility) Signet ring and 10 sealing wax (15) 2 gold rings, a silver ring, and a platinum ring, as well as 2 jeweled necklaces, 7 bracelets and 14 onyx spider pins (150) 3 bottles of fine wine (30) Masterwork Manacles (50) Small Silver, Gold Lined, onyx jeweled Mirror (50) 3 pounds of scented (strawberry) soap (4.5) 100 lb of firewood (20 baths) (.05) Large Tub (5) Flint and steel (1) 5 Barrels of Springwater (25) Noble’s Fan (5) Fancy Tent (40) (comfy for 1, cozy for 2, all luxury) Billowy Cloak (3) (can conceal gaudy outfits, large pocket for Fuzzy, black) 4 wine glasses (8) Drow poison dose (DC 13 injury, unconsioussness/2d4 hours unconsciousness) (75) (on dagger) Dagger (2) (poisoned) Indefinite Supply of blood dye (to put on Yinvezz's paws) (10) 39 platinum 76 gold, 22 silver, 15 copper On person: Poisoned dagger, Magic Garments and Jewelry, Cloak at option, Fan, Mirror, Bag of holding (usually held by Dol’Psath), Scrolls, spell component pouch, Staff Personality: While Mendalyn is unusually empathetic toward the pain of others, she is still very much as self-centered as any other drow noble. She carries around jewelry, wine, luxurious comforts, even springwater, a tub, and firewood for hot baths! She keeps around her bardic minion to keep her entertained (and comfortable). She never does tasks she deems too mundane, and is a general pain in the caboose aristocrat. Allies: Mostly her allies consist of her followers, although there may be people sympathetic to her plight if they found out why she was hunted down. Enemies: As Mendalyn is dead to the world, her enemies are few. However, if the Drow caught wind of her survival, they would do anything in thier power to eliminate her. That and she's a bloody drow, not many people take kindly to them. The Ent'Sur family of Drow are the masters of Enchantment and divination magic, and also the only house that embraces psionic members. Mendalyn was the heiress, and as such was taught enchantment and divination extensively, and taught more then any other member of the house the ways of not only surviving drow society, but how to do it in comfort. As such, she has a safe house (Also known as: small ominous keep) somewhere a few miles away from the main house that is shielded from scrying, and a bodyguard that is never without a weapon: Dol'Psath the Soulknife. Mendalyn was different from other drow too, she didn't take quite as much pleasure from the suffering of others. Perhaps she was cursed with this empathy, but she could hardly stand seeing someone get tortured. Unfortunately for her, this got out. The Ent'Sur family was never really popular what with it's association with psionics, and the prime heir being as sympathetic as she is, that was the final straw. A group of three to six families (who knows exactly how many drow were for this uprising) banded together and slaughtered nearly all of the family. However, Mendalyn's father, being the top diviner, managed to foresee the fall and did what any drow noble would do: take all he can carry and flee. However, in his haste Mendalyn found out about the coup, and fled as well. All her warnings to the rest of the family only made the fight that much more horrifying. Hidden in her safehouse after staging a fake death, the last of her family (she managed to track down her father with her scrying, he was killed by a mysterious cult), she plotted her revenge. Naturally, the maps she stole from the Library (obtained through painstaking divination) is the source of her first goal, but she is well aware that she will require... companions to manipulate into helping her. Even if it means taking the straightforward approach. She would most likely hide her race from view if she deems subtlety as a requirement to a goal. Leadership: 9th(8th) level cohort, 20 first level followers, 2 second level followers, 1 third level follower Follower (level 3): Bar'Fani, Male lesser drow (use statistics for normal elf but substitue proficiencies/languages) bard 3 Bar'Fani is a loyal retainer for Lady Mendalyn, and generally is her 'Jester' as it were. Notable spells: 6/4, Mending, message, cure light wounds, unseen servant, animate rope, prestidigitation Notable skills: Perform (sing), Perform (wind instruments), profession (masseuse), Use Rope Followers(2nd): Female Lesser Drow Sorceress: Drixie and Male Lesser Drow Ranger Draast: These people tend to the keep while Mendalyn is away. Followers (1st): 7 experts, 8 commoners, 3 adepts, 2 warriors. These people tend to the keep while Mendalyn is away. Str 16 Dex 10 Con 12 Int 10 Wis 10 Cha 14 56 HP Speed: 30ft, 40ft when psionically focused AC 15, flat-footed 15, touch 10, +2 shield bonus if not in bastard sword form Saves: +5/+7/+9 Conditional: +2 will against mind-affecting 4 PP: Resistance, Repletion, Resilience, +3 from cognizance crystal Attack: +2 Psychokinetic Mind Blade(bastard sword) +12/+7 1d10+6+1d4 +2d8 psychic strike (prep with move action) Feats: Wild Talent Speed of thought Weapon Focus (mind blade) Force of personality Iron Will Skill Focus (Disguise) Skills: Concentration +12 (11 ranks, +1 ability) Bluff +10 (5 ranks, +2 ability, +3 amulet) Disguise +17 (5 ranks, +2 ability, +3 feat, +2 bluff, +2 kit, +3 amulet) Autohypnosis +13 (11 ranks, +0 ability, +2 concentration) Items: Crystal Mask of Languages (2,500) (Elven, Undercommon, Drow Sign Language, Draconic, Abyssal) 2nd level Cognizance Crystal (3PP, 4,000) Hat of Disguise (1,800) Amulet of Persuasion (4,500) Handy Haversack (2,000) +1 chain shirt (1,250) +1 ring of lesser darkvision (30ft) (6,000) +1 cloak of resistance (1,000) 16 cure light wound potions (800) 3 cure moderate wounds potions (900) 2 lesser restoration potions (600) 1 cure serious wounds potion (750) Disguise kit x2 (100) Everburning torch (110) 5 caltrops (5) 5 antitoxin (250) Courtier's outfit (30) Flint, Steel and 10 chalk (1.1) Grappling Hook (1) Masterwork Heavy darkwood shield (257) 15 platinum, 24 gold, 16 silver, 30 copper Dart was an Elan, but he had a very odd trait about him: He had the skin color of a drow. So, he was convinced by his master(see below) to destroy drow nobility. He was trained in the arts of combat and deception, forming a blade from his mind. He received a specific mission: To take down the Ent'Sur family. With his... Special Resistance to enchantment effects (and the fact that he can fake being affected by charm person), He was perfect for the Job. After getting set up with armaments that furthered his disguise (the hat, the mask, the ring), he went and found their prime heir, Mendalyn. After hiring himself out as a guardian (by means of impersonating the existing bodyguard for her, Dol'Psath, who was also a soulknife and faking sudden vision problems), he served under Mendalyn for thirty years, slowly gaining her trust (oddly quick for a drow heiress though) and losing contact with his master around year 14. When the… incident happened, he followed his mistress, his task already have been completed for him. He has decided to hold off killing her until after he has found his master. We shall see what fate holds in store... Dart's Master is a horrible creature, an odd combination of a mind flayer and a beholder. Adventurers vanquished him, but who is to say if he is permanently gone... His webs are wide, his contacts hidden. He is the leader of the Mind's Eye clan, an illustrious secret society (more like cult) that Dart is a member of. Their symbol is a tattoo of an eye with three tentacles at the bottom, placed on various places on the body. Dart has his on his left butt cheek. While seventy-five percent of the cult was wiped out, there still are members throughout the land, now devoted to resurrecting the monstrosity. When Dart gets wind of the news, he would most likely attempt to manipulate Mendalyn into helping with the resurrection, possibly exposing himself in the process! I must admit I took some liberties, mostly with Dart's darkvision ring. The X-Ray vision ring is precedent for vision effects in a ring, and I figure slashing the range in half would also do such to the price.
jennibert 02-24-07, 01:00 PM	Yay another entry! :cheer: Probably I'll start doing the judging in advance, since I have actual time today and won't so much the rest of the week. But we'll see if that actually happens.... Keep 'em coming, guys and gals (hoping I'm not the only one who fits latter category...)!!
Orchomenos 02-24-07, 07:29 PM	Thibaude de Xinoe and Imychtazid Imychtazid the Gold Wyrm has been the protector of the Xinoe land for twenty generations, keeping the orcish hordes at bay, the goblinoid pirates out of the port’s waters, and exacting justice for the country inhabitants. Many were those asking him to settle disputes, be it for a the theft of a common tool or the murder of a parent. But Imychtazid was not eternal, and all dedicated to his human subjects, neglected to find a mate and let descendants. He decided that the humans subjects he protected for so many years would now be suitted to defend themselves. Though, the dragon wasn’t ready to totally forsake them, and he spent years to search the way to remain present beyond death. Too many years. When he finally found the mean, his death was really close, his limbs were beginning to turn numb. He needed some help to realise his ultimate plan, some help from one of these humans he protected all his life… He set his choice on Thibaude de Xinoe, a paladin-knight already respected by the population. A tall and beautiful woman, she has a long visage ending in a firm chin, high cheekbones, a large smile, and long brown hairs. Strange magic flew in her blood, a magic the wise dragon didn’t quite understand, but that was greatly increasing her personality. Imychtazid was impressed by her ability to damage her foes by merely looking at them. He was also impressed by her dedication to justice and fairness. The dragon met her, and gave her a very precise list of magical components needed for his plan. Thibaude felt very honored to be chosen by the dragon. She was born in the country of Xinoe 27 years ago, to hard-working merchants. Due to their profession, they were in contact with foreigners, and Thibaude knew that outside the borders, brigands and marauders were crouching in every road bend, usurpers were oppressing free peoples, and bloodthirsty monsters were roaming about the campaign. But there was people in these countries who wished a peace and freedom similar to that of Xinoe. She joinned the Silver Sickle Order at an early age, a world wide order dedicated to bring justice and protect the weaks in every country. After spending her life to help her neighbors, she knew it was now the time to help her own country. She set to find all these components. Powerful elven magical scrolls, masterworked dwarven tools, gnomish finely crafted gems, lime, carbon, powdered horse hoof, Thibaude had no ideas what all this was about, but she had full confidence in Imychtazid. She took months to gather all the ingredients, and came back just in time: the dragon was about to pass away. She scrupulously followed his instructions, performing mystic moves as the dragon recited primordial words. And… nothing happened. Although fully confident in the gold wyrm, she was a bit disappointed. Imychtazid painfully smiled and asked her to come back in one full week. Reluctantly, she gave her word she would. One week later, she came back at his lair. She was deeply shocked to see that Imychtazid was dead, and that his corpse has been desecrated. Indeed, the colossal dragon was lying in the middle of his cave, half-skinned. Getting closer to see who might have done this to her friend, mentor and protector, she remarked an humanoid figure in a corner of the cave, a golden suit of fullplate with a golden cloak and shield. She rushes to confront him, but the strangers didn’t move; instead, he addresses her: “Greetings, Thibaude! I was desperate to see you!” It was Imychtazid’s voice! He explaiend the long ritual she helped him to complete was a complicated contingency, meant to trigger at his death and craft a magical armor out of his flesh and keep his soul in it. The fullplate was perfectly suited for Thibaude; Imychtazid has chosen her not only to help him complete the ritual, but to be her first herald! Thibaude’s task was huge. Imychtazid has been sick for more than one year, and it wasn’t long for the troubles to arise. Bands of bugbear and gnoll marauders invaded the countryside, some merchants began to develop illicit trade and black market. To protect themselves, landowners developped their own armies, and some of them began waging war against each other. Finally, a mercenary band took control of a large bridge, charging expensive fee to anyone who wished to cross the river. Although the Silver Sickle Order and many merchants, especially her parents’ friends had full confidence in her, many were there to oppose her: nobles and commoners, distant landowners and merchants. Finally, it’s another noble who took the head of the country. But she kept on making her best to keep Xinoe a good place to live. She was able to defend herself in a battle, but Imychtazid greatly helped to protect her against the gnolls and bugbears, and with her allies, she finally cleaned the country of their presence. She was good in negociations, but Imychtazid was there to remind her past event, and his ability to throw an image of himself was often enough to convince belligerants to accept a treaty. Imychtazid is a powerful magic item. It is a suit of golden dragonhide fullplate, with helmet, shield, and cloak. In the chest of the plate, a golden yellow topaz is embeded: it is a stone of good luck. The heavy shield has a +3 enhancement, and has two dragon wings on each side, cutted in the wyrm’s own wings: it acts as a flying shield. The golden cloak, made of the smallest scales, bestows a dignified and commanding aura upon its owner, and acts as a Cloak of Charisma +4. At one of the gauntlets, a ring also made of fine scales grant the wearer 10 points of fire resistance. Finally, the armor itself is the seat of Imychtazid’s soul. Imychtazid Intelligent suit of golden dragonhide fullplate. Intelligence 15, Wisdom 16, Charisma 15; Speaks Common, Draconic and Elven; 60 ft. darkvision and hearing. Granted powers: Bless 3/day, 10 ranks in Knowledge History, Minor Image 1/day. Ego: 20 So far, Imychtazid only owner has been Thibaude de Xinoe, a human specially selected with the same goals and values. Should something happens to her, Imychtazid would prefer to serve another human from Xinoe with similar goals and values: to protect the land of Xinoe and its inhabitants, and spread peace all around. Imychtazid has no control over the other items crafted from his corpse, but would highly prefer that everything remain in the possession of the same owner. Eventually, he would like to meet a wizard who would be able to improve his magical enhancements, to the point of giving him a special purpose, which would be, of course, defending the land of Xinoe and its inhabitants. Thibaude de Xinoe: Female Phrenic Human Paladin 4/Knight 6; CR 12; Medium Humanoid (Human)(Psionic); HD 4D10+6D12+20; Init +1; spd 30 ft.; AC 26, touch 11, flat-footed 25; Base Atk +10; Grapple +12; Atk +13 melee (1d8+3, +1 longsword); Full Atk +13/+8 melee (1d8+3, +1 longsword); SA Smite Evil, Turn Undead, Psi-Like Abilities; SQ Aura of good, detect evil, divine grace, lay on hands, aura of courage, divine health, knight’s challenge (9/day), fighting challenge +1 (11 rounds), test of mettle (DC19), knight’s code, shield block +1, bulwark of defense, armor mastery (medium), vigilant defender, shield ally, naturally psionic, power resistance 20; AL LG; SV Fort +17, Ref +10, Will +10; STR 14, DEX 12, CON 15, INT 14, WIS 12, CHA 22. Skills & Feats: Climb +8, Concentration +9, Diplomacy +15, Heal +8, Intimidate +12, Jump +8, Ride +14, Sense Motive +8, Swim +8; Psionic Weapon(H), Power Attack(1), Mounted Combat (B), Combat Expertise, Endurance(B), Divine Shield(6), Divine Might(9), Diehard(B). Psi-like abilities: 3/day: Defensive Precognition (+4 AC), Empty Mind (+6 Will Save), Mind Thrust (10d10, DC22), Intellect Fortress (4 rounds); 1/day: Force Screen (+6 AC), Body Adjustment (heal 4d12), Brain Lock (can daze any creature type, DC18), Aversion (13 hours, DC21), Concussion Blast (4d6, 4 targets), Psychic Crush (can’t be augmented, DC21). Equipment: Imychtazid, Intelligent +1 Dragonhide Fullplate (16 200 gp), Winged Shield (+3 Heavy Shield)(17444 gp), Stone of Good Luck (20 000 gp), Cloak of Charisma +4 (16 000 gp), Ring of Fire Resistance, Minor (12 000 gp), +1 Longsword (2315 gp). Thibaude is now 32, and has been the proud herald of Imychtazid for 5 years now. “Herald” is a title she gives to herself for her devotion to the late gold dragon; in fact the intelligent armor has very few power for now, and is more there to help her than the reverse. She failed to get any political power, but everyone in Xinoe respect her, at least enough to not directly oppose her. Her true strength is in battle, defending fellow comrades or at the head of an army. Before a figth, she uses her Divine Shield ability to increase her shield bonus to AC of +6 and Defensive Precognition for a +4 insight bonus to AC, giving her a total AC of 36; she usually keeps her Force Screen ability if she has to fight an incorporeal foe. Once protected, she uses her Test of Mettle ability to draw all her foes to herself, allowing her allies to pummel them. She will use her Aversion and Intellect Fortress powers to help protect vulnerable allies. She has no problems using Brain Lock or Concussion Blast to control a foe, since it doesn’t cause lethal damage, but she keeps the other psionic powers for demons, undeads and other non-negociable foes. Against such monsters, she is merciless. She has no such scrupule while fighting in melee, as she judges a wounded foe can always surrender..She will not hesitates to power attack an ill-armored foe, adding more damages thanks to her Divine Might feat and Smite Evil ability.
Comus 02-24-07, 11:51 PM	Drakth'yar the Invincible The hero screamed out a battlecry as she charged the enemy, the weak-minded minions losing their courage and fleeing her path to their blackguard commander. The commander drew his weapon and watched the heavily armored fighter draw near. The blackguard had fought in countless battles against the best that mankind could offer, and expected this would be no different. He was expecting a long, drawn-out duel to the death, a battle of wits as much as strength and- And then he realized he had drastically miscalculated his opponents height. The thing just barely made it past his knees. A halfling? It wasn't built right for that. What else could it be, though? A goblin? It had almost reached him before he identified it. He couldn't believe it. A kobold?! "Prepare to meet your doom, evildoer!" Drakth'yar screamed, swinging at the blackguard's ankles. Stat Block Drakth'yar the Invincible (Also known as Caitia, but don't let that get around) Lawful Good Female Kobold Fighter 12 HP: 71 (assuming full HP at first level) Initiative: +2 Speed: 20' AC: 34 [Touch 21, FF 32] (10 +12 armor (+4 mythril fullplate), +2 dex, +7 shield (+4 heavy steel shield), +1 size, +1 natural, +1 deflection) BAB/Grapple: +12/+11 Attack: +3 Heavy Pick +19 melee (1d4+6) or +1 Returning Javelin +15 ranged (1d4+4) Full Attack: +3 Heavy Pick +19/+14/+9 melee (1d4+6) or +1 Returning Javelin +15 ranged (1d4+4) Space/Reach: 5'/5' Special Attacks: -- Special Qualities: Darkvision 60', Light Sensitivity Saves: Fort: +10, Ref: +8, Will: +7 (+2 bonus on saves from cloak are included) Abilities: Str 14 (16 with gauntlets), Dex 14, Con 10, Int 10, Wis 13, Cha 13 Skills: Intimidate +16 (15 ranks, +1 cha bonus), Craft (trapmaking) +15 (13 ranks, +2 racial bonus), Speak Language (Common) Feats: Kiai Shout, Shield Specialization (heavy), Shield Ward, Intimidating Strike, Combat Focus, Leadership, Combat Stability, Combat Reflexes, Greater Kiai Shout, Combat Vigor, Robilar's Gambit, Armor Specialization (fullplate) Possessions: +4 mythril fullplate, +4 heavy steel shield, +3 heavy pick, +1 returning javelin, ring of protection +1, ring of feather falling, gauntlets of ogre power, heward's handy haversack, brooch of shielding, cloak of resistance +2, 2 potions ofcure serious wounds, 2 potions of cure moderate wounds, Deluxe Adventuring Kit, 171 gp. Deluxe Adventuring Kit: Standard Kit (20 gp) Dagger - 2gp Morningstar - 8gp Club - Free Sling - Free Sling Bullets (10) - 1sp Backpack - 2gp Caltrops (2) - 2gp Sack, Empty - 1sp 50' hemp rope - 1gp Oil Flasks (4) - 4sp Flint and Steel - 1gp 10 pieces of chalk - 1sp Winter Blanket - 5sp Traveler's Outfit - 1gp Waterskin - 1gp Rations (1 day) - 5sp Lamp, Common - 1 sp Bedroll - 1sp Fishhook - 1sp Plus Acid Flask (2) - 20gp Holy Water (2) - 50gp Manacles - 15gp Grappling Hook - 1gp Fishing net - 4gp Alchemists's Fire (2) - 40 gp Smokestick - 20gp Tanglefoot bag (2) - 100gp Thunderstone - 30gp Background Background : Drakth'yar is a great hero of the Kobolds, though few others have heard of him. He is an invincible warrior, surviving even the most terrible battle. Or at least that's what they say. In reality, Drakth'yar has died dozens of times, with his apprentice taking up the name and armor and carrying on the legend. Caitia is the latest to fill his boots, and has only been Drakth'yar for a few months. And even in that short time, she has faced nearly impossible odds and survived. The Drakth'yar is sent to complete missions that are hopeless, that are suicidal. When something can't be done, Drakth'yar does it anyway, because there's no alternative. Any mention of Drakth'yar dying is kept silent, leaks of the information attributed to fools or the insane. Caitia is currently on one such task, lending assistance to a band of heroes in their fight against an evil wizard. She hopes that tales of her heroism will work to change popular views of kobolds, making them more accepted in society at large. Within the party, she acts as point defense, holding areas on the battlefield by virtue of being almost impossible to move. Her followers act as scouts, guards, and messengers as needed, with standing orders to stay out of trouble and get to cover as soon as battle starts. Caitia's early life was fairly average for a kobold, though it was obvious she was special even from a very young age. She excelled in combat training, and after serving as part of the guard for her small tribe, Drakth'yar chose her to be his shieldbearer. It was a role that she excelled at. But it was also a difficult life. Caitia was taken along on the impossible missions Drakth'yar was assigned, and so she was there when her predecessor was killed. And, in the great tradition, took his name and his armor, giving the body a quiet and secret burial. She joined the adventuring party when it passed through her tribe's land, a rough, rocky area with little plant life on the edge of a mountain valley. They were initially wary of having her along, thinking she'd be a liability. Drakth'yar proved herself in battle time and time again, earning their respect a little at a time. Personality and Tactics Personality : Drakth'yar is infinitely brave, fears nothing, and leads others to glory. Caitia is finding the bravery part to be the most difficult. She goes into every battle terrified, sure that she'll be killed. But she doesn't show it. Caitia projects false confidence, and the bravado seems to work. Once in a while she's so caught up acting like she isn't afraid that she doesn't have time to actually get scared. Out of combat, she relaxes a lot, and more of her true personality shows through. Caitia sees every sentient as being equal - not surprising, considering there aren't many peoples kobolds can look down on. She tries to be friendly and open with everyone, but has a bad habit of considering herself equal to nobility and royalty. Thankfully, thus far most have humored her. Tactics : Drakth'yar opens almost every battle with a Greater Kiai Shout, hoping to scatter weaker enemies. She tends to go after strong enemies alone, in open combat - the exact opposite of the standard kobold approach to battle. Once she's comfortable (in Combat Focus), she'll start leaving openings in her stance (Robilar's Gambit) and punish the enemy for taking advantage of them. Enemies and Allies Enemies : Drakth'yar has enemies no matter who wears the armor. Some kobold tribes can't stand the idea of one of their racial heroes working with other races, so even safe havens can turn out to be deathtraps. Just being a kobold is as dangerous as ever, of course, and has been cause for attacks on several occasions. Probably Drakth'yar's greatest foe, at the moment, is a hobgoblin warchieftan she managed to humiliate earlier in her career. He hasn't given up thoughts of revenge, despite finding that his tactics fail again and again, often for almost unbelievable reasons. Allies : Drakth'yar's two greatest assets are her fellow party members and her entourage. The party members are a bit outside the scope of this contest, so we'll skip them for the moment. Drakth'yar's leadership score is 14 (12 +1 CHA, +1 for special power (I think invincibility counts)). This gives her a 10th level cohort, 15 1st level followers and 1 2nd level follower. Cohort - Ritxil, Lawful Good male Kobold 10th level Cleric (Of the Ideal of Heroism, domains Strength and Luck). Followers - (all kobolds) 5 1st level Adepts, 6 1st level Warriors, 4 1st level Experts, 1 2nd level Warrior. Drakth'yar's entourage are all volunteers that followed her on her quest. They provide minor healing for the party, help with research, and act as camp guards. Ritxil is the only one who actually goes into battle with the party, and is being groomed to take up the role of Drakth'yar when Caitia falls, as she knows she eventually will. Notes Notes : Weakest race. Weakest class. Gotta count for something. This character does much better as a Crusader from the ToB. I originally designed her for play as such, and she was great - nearly impossible to kill (delayed damage and stone power) and able to heal party members at the same time she put the... extremely minor hurt on enemies. The party included two melee machines, one greatsword-wielding fighter and a dwarven barbarian. They did the damage, I kept them alive and drew as many attacks as possible. It becomes very demoralizing to the enemy when they find they can't kill the kobold, even when they hit squarely with their strongest attack. Oh, and just so there's a record of how points were spent on her stats... STR 15 [8 points] (-4 racial) 11 (+3 from levels) 14 DEX 12 [4 points] (+2 racial) 14 CON 12 [4 points] (-2 racial) 10 INT 10 [2 points] WIS 13 [5 points] CHA 13 [5 points]
Zherog 02-25-07, 01:37 PM	Wow, a flurry of activity! Awesome! List updated. We're up to 8 entries. A fine contest - but more would be even better. There's still a little over 24 hours left to get those entries in!
Lazzmaniandevil 02-26-07, 09:30 AM	The freedom defenders Fiero Svoboda, human Cleric 7 / thaumathurgist 5 Size/Type: Medium Humanoid (human) Age: 42 Hit Dice: 7d8+5d4+12 (59 hp) Initiative: -1 Speed: 30 ft. (6 squares), 20ft in full plate armor Armor Class: 25 (-1 Dex, + 10 armor, +4 shield, +2 deflection), touch 11, flat-footed 25 Base Attack/Grapple: +7/+8 Attack: +2 shortspear of shock +10 melee or +8 ranged 1d6+3 plus 1d6 electricity Full Attack: +2 shortspear of shock +10/+5 melee or +8 ranged 1d6+3 plus 1d6 electricity Space/Reach: 5 ft./5 ft. Special Attacks: turn undead Special Qualities: aura, improved ally, extended summoning, contingent conjuration, planar cohort Saves: Fort +9, Ref +4, Will +18 Abilities: Str 12, Dex 8, Con 12, Int 13, Wis 24, Cha 12 Armor check penalty: -5 Languages: Common, celestial Skills: Concentration +9, Diplomacy +8, Heal +9 (+11 with healer's kit), Knowledge (planes) +8, Knowledge (religion) +13, Listen +9, Move silently -1, Ride +6, Sense motive +12, Spellcraft +8, Spot +9, Survival +7 (+9 on other planes) Feats: spell focus (conjuration), extra turning, craft magic arms and armor, divine ward (PH2), augment summoning (b), imbued summoning (PH2), skill focus (ride) Challenge Rating: 12 Alignment: chaotic good Turn undead (Su): 8/day; turning check +3 (+1 Cha +2 knowl. Religion synergy); turning damage +8 (+7 cleric level +1 Cha) (see PHB p159) Aura (Ex): strong aura, chaotic and good Improved Ally: When Fiero casts a planar ally spell (including the lesser and greater versions), he makes a Diplomacy check to convince the creature to aid him for a reduced payment. If his diplomacy check adjusts the creature’s attitude to helpful, the creature will work for 50% of the standard fee, as long as the task is one that is not against its nature.This class feature only works when the planar ally shares at least one aspect of alignment with the thaumaturgist. A thaumaturgist can have only one such ally at a time, but he may bargain for tasks from other planar allies normally. Extended Summoning: All spells from the summoning subschool that Fiero casts have their durations doubled, as if the extend spell feat had been applied to them. The levels of the summoning spells don’t change, however. Contingent Conjuration: Fiero can prepare a summoning or calling spell ahead of time to be triggered by some other event. This functions as described for the contingency spell, including casting the summoning or calling spell beforehand. The spell is cast instantly when the trigger event occurs. The conditions needed to bring the spell into effect must be clear, although they can be general. If complicated or convoluted condition as are prescribed, the contingent conjuration may fail when triggered. The conjuration spell occurs based solely on the stated conditions, regardless of whether Fiero wants it to, although most conjurations can be dismissed normally. A thaumaturgist can have only one contingent conjuration active at a time. Fiero has always one contingent conjuration in effect. Currently, his contingent conjuration states that if he is reduced to less than ¼ hp (14 or less), a Bralani is summoned. Each contingent conjuration lasts for 12 days or until discharged. Planar Cohort: Fiero can use any of the planar ally spells to call a creature to act as his cohort. The called creature serves loyally and well as long as the thaumaturgist continues to advance a cause important to the creature.To call a planar cohort, Fiero must cast the relevant spell, paying the XP costs normally. It takes an offering of 1,000 gp × the HD of the creature to convince it to serve as a planar cohort, and the improved ally class feature can’t be used to reduce or eliminate this cost. The planar cohort can’t have more than 12HD, and must have an ECL no higher than 10. A thaumaturgist can have only one planar cohort at a time, but he can continue to make agreements with other called creatures normally. Fiero currently has an half-celestial Pegasus named Benito as his planar cohort. Deity: Trithereon (CD) Domains: liberation (CD), summoner (CD) Liberation granted power (Su): Get a second save 1 round later when affected by a charm, compulsion or fear affect Summoner granted power: +2 to caster level for summoning and calling spells Spells: Caster level 12th; Per day – 6/7+1/6+1/6+1/4+1/4+1/3+1; Spells' DC: Conjuration 18 + spell level, other schools 17 + spell level Typical spells prepared (D = Domain spell): Level-0 create water, detect magic, detect poison, light, read magic, resistance Level-1 command (DC18), deathwatch, detect law, nimbus of light (CD), Omen of peril (D; CD), resurgence (CD), shield of faith, summon monster I (celestial monkey; CL 14th) Level-2 enthrall (DC19), hold person (DC19), iron silence (CAd), shield other, sound burst (DC19), undetectable alignment (D), zone of truth (DC19) Level-3 Chain of eyes (CD), lesser telepathic bond (CD), locate object, protection form energy, searing light, summon monster III (D; celestial dire badger; CL 14th), vigor (imbued in summon monster V; CD) Level-4 energy vortex (DC21; CD), freedom of movement (D), spell immunity, summon monster IV (celestial giant eagle; CL 14th), tongues Level-5 break enchantment (D), divine agility (CD), greater command (DC22), insect plague (CL 14th), mark of justice Level-6 blade barrier (DC23), find the path, greater dispel magic (D), imbued (vigor) summon monster V (1d3 celestial lions; CL 14th) OR summon monster VI (Bralani; CL 14th) Possessions Market price cost weight Notes +2 full plate of silent moves 9,400 gp 7,050 gp 50 lb +2 mithral heavy shield 5,020 gp 3,765 gp 5 lb +2 shortspear of shock 18,302 gp 13,726.5 gp 3 lb Periapt of wisdom +4 16,000gp 16,000 gp -- Ring of protection +2 8,000 gp 8,000 gp -- Chime of opening (8 charges) 2,400 gp 2,400 gp 1 lb Ring of the ram (32 charges) 5,504 gp 5,504 gp -- Cloak of resistance +2 4,000 gp 4,000 gp 1 lb Healer's kit (full) 50 gp 50 gp 1 lb Holy symbol of Trithereon 25gp 25 gp 1 lb Potions* 4,350 gp 4,350 gp -- Backpack 2gp 2gp 2 lb Waterskin 1gp 1gp 4 lb Bullseye lantern 12 gp 12 gp 3 lb Metamagic rod, lesser-maximize 14,000gp 14,000gp Gems** 955gp 955gp -- Coins (53pp, 93gp,24sp) 634.4gp 634.4gp 3.4 lb Silk rope, 50ft 10gp 10 gp 5 lb *** Bedroll 0.1gp 0.1gp 5 lb *** Flint and steel 1gp 1gp -- *** 10 days of rations 5gp 5gp 10lb *** Pair of platinum rings 50 gp 50 gp -- +3 large stud. leath. barding 9,700 gp 7,275 gp 40 lb *** Saddlebags 4gp 4 gp 8 lb *** Masterwork riding saddle (CAd) 180 gp 180 gp 30 lb *** Total 88,000gp * fly, invisibility (3), lesser restoration, neutralize poison, remove disease, spider climb (3) ** 1 Yellow topaz (460gp), 1 silver pearl (150gp), 2 tourmalines (90gp each), 1 smoky rose quartz (65gp), 2 moonstones (45gp each), 1 blue quartz (10gp) *** Carried by Benito Breakdown of abilities, skills and saves Abilities breakdown: base pt-buy age lvl/4 item total Strength 13 5 -1 12 Dexterity 9 1 -1 8 Constitution 13 5 -1 12 Intelligence 12 4 +1 13 Wisdom 16 10 +1 +3 +4 24 Charisma 11 3 +1 12 Total 28 Skills breakdown: Concentration 1 (Con) + 8 ranks = +9 Diplomacy 1 (Cha) + 2 (sense motive synergy) + 5 ranks = +8 Heal 7 (Wis) +2 ranks = +9 Knowl (planes) 1 (Int) + 7 ranks = +8 Knowl (relig.) 1 (Int) + 12 ranks = +13 Listen 7 (Wis) +2 rank (cross-class) = +9 Move silently -1 (Dex) -5 (armor check penalty) +5 (silent moves) = -1 Ride -1 (Dex) +3 ranks (cross-class) +1 (saddle) + 3 skill focus = +6 Sense motive 7 (Wis) + 5 ranks = +12 Spellcraft 1 (Int) + 7 ranks = +8 Spot 7 (Wis) +2 rank (cross-class) = +9 Survival 7 (Wis) Skill points: (level 12 X 3) X (2 + 1 (int) + 1 (human) ) = 15 X 4 = 60 skill points Skill points spent: 46 class ranks + (7 cross-class ranks X 2) = 60 skill points Saves breakdown: Fort +6 base +1 Con +2 item = +9 Ref +3 base -1 Dex +2 item = +4 Will +9 base +7 Wis +2 item = +18 Physical description Fiero is a nearly 6 ft tall, middle-aged man. His posture is as straight as it can be, characteristic of man with such pride and self-confidence. At first glance, it may even make him appear a bit taller than he actually is. Although not overly muscular, he still looks relatively handsome for a man his age. His grey hair and silver beard, combined with his deep pale blue eyes and his pearly white skin, grants him an almost celestial appearance. When not wearing his full plate armor, Fiero likes to wear white, silver or blue clothing, made from fine, yet not too expensive, fabrics. Background As a kid, Fiero lived in a small hunting village, where he spent most of his days playing freely in the nearby forest. He had a really happy childhood, until his village was raided by a large band of gnolls. Fiero, his parents and everyone he knew was taken as prisoners. Little Fiero spent over three months in a small cage, as he was too small to be used as a slave. Slowly but surely, he saw his parents turned from happy, healthy individuals to broken down and always exhausted persons. As soon as they became too frail to work, his parents disappeared and were never brought back to their cage, probably killed by the gnolls. Fiero was later sold to a lawful evil human kingdom, where he was put in a military school. Despite the school brainwashing techniques, Fiero could never accept the way of life presented to him. Considered useless and "un-trainable" by the military, he was abandoned and left to die in a forest known for its mysterious dangers, where he was rescued by a small group of Trithereon's adept. Fiero immediately embraced the group's philosophy and eventually decided to become a cleric of Trithereon. Personality If there is one value that Fiero sees has more important than all others, it is liberty. For Fiero, as well as for most clerics of Trithereon, no creature has the right to imprison another. Freedom and liberty are sacred above all things. This is why he has dedicated his life to its defense. The middle-aged cleric defends his values with pride and self-confidence. For him, his eternally renewed self-confidence is a way to prove to all those who have tried to oppress him that they can't keep him down. He believes that confidence is half the battle, and will often point out how oppressors will have you believe that you are not worthy of being free. Fiero is also a bit of a tormented soul, as he has promised himself not to rest until all good people can enjoy freedom. Because of that, he sometimes feels guilty when he takes the time to enjoy his own freedom and forget his cause, even for a moment. Fiero's planar cohort: Benito, half-celestial pegasus Size/Type: Large Outsider (native) Hit Dice: 4d10+20 (42 hp) Initiative: +3 Speed: 60 ft. (12 squares), fly 120 ft. (average) Armor Class: 22 (-1 size, +3 Dex, +4 natural, +6 armor), touch 12, flat-footed 19 Base Attack/Grapple: +4/+12 Attack: Hoof +9 melee (1d6+6) Full Attack: 2 hooves +9 melee (1d6+6) and bite +4 melee (1d3+3) Space/Reach: 10 ft./5 ft. Special Attacks: Daylight, smite evil Special Qualities: Darkvision 60 ft., low-light vision, scent, spell-like abilities, Immunity to disease, Resistance to acid 10, cold 10, and electricity 10, Damage reduction 5/magic, Spell resistance 14 Saves: Fort +9 (+13 vs poison), Ref +7, Will +6 Abilities: Str 22, Dex 17, Con 20, Int 12, Wis 17, Cha 17 Armor check penalty: 0 Languages: Common, celestial Skills: Concentration +8, Diplomacy +11, Hide +6, Knowledge (planes) +4, Listen +14, Move silently +6, Search +4, Sense Motive +12, Spot +14, Survival +6 Feats: Flyby Attack, Iron Will Challenge Rating: 4 Alignment: chaotic good Level Adjustment: +6 (cohort) Equivalent Character Level (ECL): 10 Benito’s natural weapons are treated as magic weapons for the purpose of overcoming damage reduction. Spell-Like Abilities: At will — detect good and detect evil within a 60-foot radius (caster level 5th); 3/day — Protection from evil; 1/day — aid, bless, detect evil (caster level 4th) Daylight (Su): As a half-celestial, Benito can use a daylight effect (as the spell) at will. Smite Evil (Su): As a half-celestial, once per day, Benito can make a normal melee attack to deal +4 extra damage against an evil foe. Skills: As a Pegasus, Benito has a +4 racial bonus on Listen and Spot checks. Carrying Capacity: Benito's light load is up to 519 pounds; a medium load, 520-1038 pounds; and a heavy load, 1039-1560 pounds. Physical description Like any Pegasus, Benito looks like a winged horse. However, his celestial heritage is rather obvious, as it is hard not to notice his especially majestic white fur. His wings show a slight gradation in color, from pearly white where they emerged from his body towards a shiny silver color at their ends. His lustrous mane is a slightly darker silver color. His pale grey eyes and his calm stare almost always give an impression of peace and happiness. Personality Like Fiero, Benito values freedom more than anything else. However, unlike his human friend, he is much more at peace with himself, enjoying every moment of his life. He feels in perfect harmony and believes he has reached a good equilibrium between bringing freedom to others and enjoying his own. Fiero and Benito's relation Despite Benito accepting just recently to officially become Fiero's cohort, the two freedom-lovers have had quite a long relationship. Fiero still remembers his first planar ally spell. He was stuck on the roof of a high tower after freeing a prisoner. He knew he had no possibility of going back down as he would have to face the former slave's master. He asked Trithereon to send him a winged ally so they could fly away. When he saw Benito appear, Fiero could hardly believe his eyes, dazzled that he was by the pegasus' astonishing grace. For Fiero, Benito was the materialization of freedom. Once the situation explained to him, Benito agreed to fly them away to safety without even asking for a payment. Since then, Fiero has called Benito over a few dozens of times and their relation has grown stronger and stronger. They share the same ideal, and the same determination to obtain it. They look out for and protect each other to the best of their abilities. The duo's strategies Practically every morning, Fiero casts iron silence to negate his armor check penalty to hide and move silently for 12 hours. As he often works in lawful, heavily militarized kingdoms, he generally casts undetectable alignment on himself. If necessary (if his previous one has either expired or have been discharged), he prepares a new contingent conjuration. Finally, unless time doesn't allow him, he spends 10 minutes creating a divine ward between himself and Benito. Fiero and Benito understand that, in the kind of civilization where slavery is taking place, individuals are often the manipulated victims of a strong leader and not evil by nature. Being rather peaceful individuals, they try not to make unnecessary victims whenever it is possible. When freeing slaves, they try as much as possible to avoid combat with guards and lower ranks officials, using spells such as command, enthrall, hold person, mark of justice and greater command to prevent those individuals to interfere with his actions. When looking for a site of imprisonment, Fiero often uses locate object (chain or manacles) to locate the place. Knowing that his reflexes are not is greatest strength, Fiero often uses his divine agility spell whenever he feels the situation might requires some quick reactions (this spell, among other things, raises his reflex save to +11). If he sees that a particular mission requires more stealth than his magic can grant him, he will wait until the next day and will prepare and use a planar ally spell, requesting Trithereon for an invisible stalker. When faced with difficult enemies, one of his most favorite strategies is to cast his blade barrier between himself and his enemies, and then summon 1d3 celestial lions to appear on the enemies' side. He then mounts Benito who flies over the enemies and uses its fly-by attacks while Fiero casts other offense spells. Most frequently summoned creatures Summoned Bralani (with augment summoning) Size/Type: Medium Outsider (Chaotic, Extraplanar, Good) Hit Dice: 6d8+30 (57 hp) Initiative: +8 Speed: 40 ft. (8 squares), fly 100 ft. (perfect) Armor Class: 20 (+4 Dex, +6 natural), touch 14, flat-footed 16 Base Attack/Grapple: +6/+12 Attack: +1 holy scimitar +13 melee (1d6+6/18-20) or +1 holy composite longbow (+4 Str bonus) +11 ranged (1d8+7/×3) or slam +12 melee (1d6+6) Full Attack: +1 holy scimitar +13/+8 melee (1d6+6/18-20) or +1 holy composite longbow (+4 Str bonus) +11/+6 ranged (1d8+7/×3) or slam +12 melee (1d6+6) Space/Reach: 5 ft./5 ft. Special Attacks: Spell-like abilities, whirlwind blast Special Qualities: Alternate form, damage reduction 10/cold iron or evil, darkvision 60 ft., immunity to electricity and petrification, low-light vision, resistance to cold 10 and fire 10, spell resistance 17, tongues Saves: Fort +10, Ref +9, Will +7 Abilities: Str 22, Dex 18, Con 21, Int 13, Wis 14, Cha 14 Skills: Concentration +12, Diplomacy +4, Escape Artist +13, Handle Animal +11, Hide +13, Jump +12, Listen +13, Move Silently +13, Ride +6, Sense Motive +11, Spot +13, Tumble +13, Use Rope +4 (+6 with bindings) Feats: Alertness, Blind-Fight, Improved Initiative Challenge Rating: 6 Alignment: Chaotic good A bralani’s natural weapons, as well as any weapons it wields, are treated as chaotic-aligned and good-aligned for the purpose of overcoming damage reduction. Spell-Like Abilities: At will— blur, charm person (DC 13), gust of wind (DC 14), mirror image, wind wall; 2/day—lightning bolt (DC 15), cure serious wounds (DC 15). Caster level 6th. The save DCs are Charisma-based. Whirlwind Blast (Su): When in whirlwind form, a bralani can attack with a scouring blast of wind, dealing 3d6 points of damage in a 20-foot line (Reflex DC 16 half). The save DC is Constitution-based. Alternate Form (Su): A bralani can shift between its humanoid and whirlwind forms as a standard action. In humanoid form, it cannot fly or use its whirlwind blast, but it can use its spell-like abilities and its weapons. In whirlwind form, it can fly, make slam attacks and whirlwind blast attacks, and use spell-like abilities. A bralani remains in one form until it chooses to assume a new one. A change in form cannot be dispelled, nor does the bralani revert to any particular form when killed. A true seeing spell, however, reveals both forms simultaneously. Tongues (Su): Bralanis can speak with any creature that has a language, as though using a tongues spell (caster level 14th). This ability is always active. Celestial lions (with augment summoning and imbued vigor) Large Magical Beast (Extraplanar) Hit Dice: 5d8+20 (42 hp) Initiative: +3 Speed: 40 ft. (8 squares) Armor Class: 15 (-1 size, +3 Dex, +3 natural), touch 12, flat-footed 12 Base Attack/Grapple: +3/+12 Attack: Claw +9 melee (1d4+7) Full Attack: 2 claws +9 melee (1d4+7) and bite +2 melee (1d8+3) Space/Reach: 10 ft./5 ft. Special Attacks: Pounce, improved grab, rake 1d4+3, Smite Evil 1/day (+5 damage) Special Qualities: Low-light vision, scent, Darkvision 60ft, Acid, Cold and Electricity Resistance 5, Spell Resistance 10, fast healing 2 Saves: Fort +8, Ref +7, Will +2 Abilities: Str 25, Dex 17, Con 19, Int 3, Wis 12, Cha 6 Skills: Balance +7, Hide +3*, Listen +5, Move Silently +11, Spot +5 Feats: Alertness, Run Alignment: Chaotic Good Locust Swarm (with augment summoning) Size/Type: Diminutive Vermin (Swarm) Hit Dice: 6d8+6 (33 hp) Initiative: +4 Speed: 10 ft. (2 squares), fly 30 ft. (poor) Armor Class: 18 (+4 size, +4 Dex), touch 18, flat-footed 14 Base Attack/Grapple: +4/— Attack: Swarm (2d6) Full Attack: Swarm (2d6) Space/Reach: 10 ft./0 ft. Special Attacks: Distraction Special Qualities: Darkvision 60 ft., immune to weapon damage, swarm traits, vermin traits Saves: Fort +4, Ref +6, Will +2 Abilities: Str 5, Dex 19, Con 12, Int Ø, Wis 10, Cha 2 Skills: Listen +4, Spot +4 Feats: — Celestial giant eagle (with augment summoning) Large Magical Beast (Extraplanar) Hit Dice: 4d10+12 (34 hp) Initiative: +3 Speed: 10 ft. (2 squares), fly 80 ft. (average) Armor Class: 15 (-1 size, +3 Dex, +3 natural), touch 12, flat-footed 12 Base Attack/Grapple: +4/+12 Attack: Claw +9 melee (1d6+6) Full Attack: 2 claws +9 melee (1d6+6) and bite +4 melee (1d8+3) Space/Reach: 10 ft./5 ft. Special Attacks: Smite Evil 1/day (+4 damage) Special Qualities: Low-light vision, evasion, Darkvision 60ft, Damage Reduction 5/magic, Acid, Cold and Electricity Resistance 5, Spell Resistance 9 Saves: Fort +7, Ref +7, Will +3 Abilities: Str 22, Dex 17, Con 16, Int 10, Wis 14, Cha 10 Skills: Knowledge (nature) +2, Listen +6, Sense Motive +4, Spot +15, Survival +3 Feats: Alertness, Flyby Attack Alignment: Always Chaotic Good Celestial dire badger (with augment summoning) Medium Magical Beast (Extraplanar) Hit Dice: 3d8+21 (34 hp) Initiative: +3 Speed: 30 ft. (6 squares), burrow 10 ft. Armor Class: 16 (+3 Dex, +3 natural), touch 13, flat-footed 13 Base Attack/Grapple: +2/+4 Attack: Claw +6 melee (1d4+3) Full Attack: 2 claws +6 melee (1d4+3) and bite +1 melee (1d6+1) Space/Reach: 5 ft./5 ft. Special Attacks: Rage, Smite Evil 1/day (+3 damage) Special Qualities: Low-light vision, scent, Darkvision 60ft, Acid, Cold and Electricity Resistance 5, Spell Resistance 8 Saves: Fort +9, Ref +6, Will +4 Abilities: Str 18, Dex 17, Con 23, Int 3, Wis 12, Cha 10 Skills: Listen +6, Spot +6 Feats: Alertness, Toughness, Track (B) Alignment: Chaotic Good Celestial monkey (with augment summoning) Tiny Magical Beast Hit Dice: 1d8 + 2 (6 hp) Initiative:+2 Speed: 30 ft. (6 squares), climb 30 ft. Armor Class: 14 (+2 size, +2 Dex), touch 14, flat-footed 12 Base Attack/Grapple: +0/-12 Attack: Bite +4 melee (1d3-2) Full Attack: Bite +4 melee (1d3-2) Space/Reach: 2-1/2 ft./0 ft. Special Attacks: Smite Evil 1/day (+1 damage) Special Qualities: Low-light vision, Darkvision 60ft, Acid, Cold and Electricity Resistance 5, Spell Resistance 6 Saves: Fort +4, Ref +4, Will +1 Abilities: Str 7, Dex 15, Con 14, Int 3, Wis 12, Cha 5 Skills: Balance + 10, Climb +12, Hide +10, Listen +3, Spot +3 Feats: Weapon Finesse Alignment: Chaotic Good Legend CAd = Complete Adventurer CD = Complete Divine PH2 = Player's Handbook II
edwardsobel 02-26-07, 12:05 PM	Well my entry: Balrock Gourd Ogre Paladin 6 / Giant 4 The story of Balrock in his own words: Balrock is heard before seen as he makes his usual entrance into almost any establishment meant for human sized individuals. First a loud bang at the front door quickly followed by two or three more. A quick glance shows a rather ugly humanoid easily 9' tall attempting to fit his huge frame through a small door. It seems a simple task for most, but one can quickly see why he is having more trouble that usual. He is carrying what appears to be a huge oak door strapped to his arm obviously being used as a shield. Propped against the wall near the entrance to the tavern is a huge Warhammer (twice the size a normal person would wield). The "creature" eventually figures that the shield too must remain outside so he props that next to the warhammer and ducks down and squeezes his way into the tavern. Though he is clearly an Ogre one can see a definite trace of human in his features. A large forehead juts over his eyes covered only by long straggly black hair that probably hasn't been washed in days (or perhaps longer) and he is wearing what appears to be an old bloody bandage as a blindfold; despite the fact his eyes are covered he walks easily as though the blindfold weren’t there. Though not entirely hideous in appearance he definitely is no charismatic hero either. He is clad in remnants of animal fur tied together with leather straps, some of the furs still matted with blood from the animal that once owned them or perhaps from somewhere else. The giant has an odor of sweat and blood about him with a slight hint of decaying garbage and it is easy enough to determine the source of the odor, a sack slung over the shoulder with the words “Mageick Bag” scrawled on the side. Despite his appearance and odor there is a strong aura of goodness around him, at least to those that can sense such things. Around his neck hangs a necklace, a leather strap tied to what appears to be a carved wooden hammer. The giant takes a seat on a small chair crushing it under his weight, but it still holds. Finally his purpose here is apparent, he is to regale the tale of his life to the one he sits with, and any who are in earshot. "You ask for Balrock life? Well OK.." his voice is low and booming as though he has no concept of a quiet conversation. "Balrock name really Balrock Gourd, but sometimes Balrock forget last part. Balrock big and strong. Grow up with Ogres, but mom different. Her have less hair and pale skin. Her teach Balrock human speak. Mom nice. Dad strong. Dad mean. Him beat Balrock up. Him teach Balrock get shinies. Mom teach Balrock do good.” The demeanor of Balrock is almost that of a child out in the world for the first time His grasp of the common tongue is shaky at best. And it is soon apparent that he is easily confused by big words. Balrock always has a huge smile across his face when he tells of his mom it is apparent that Balrock really loves his mom. "Balrock really good at know some things. Balrock know when not open door and when bad things 'bout to happen. Good at not eat bad things and sometimes good at not listen bad people. Even Mom always say Balrock wize. Not sure what that mean but sure it good. Mom nice." "One day mom say bad thing, Balrock not know what but dad get real mad. Dad beat up Mom, mom take long nap, she not wake up yet. Balrock get mad and beat up Dad. Balrock punished for beat dad. So Balrock sent to war pit to fight." "Balrock not allowed weapon so Balrock must fight with hands. Balrock not think fair but must do law." He paused to gather what thoughts he can, trying to remember his past. Balrock continues, "Balrock loose much fights, soon learn must use weapon. Balrock find rock in war pit so Balrock use it. Balrock throw rock at human in pit and hit him. Human hurt bad him soon die unless him get heal by shaman" Balrock pauses his story at this point a sense of sadness has overcome him. The giant wipes a tear from his eye then continues on, "Balrock feel bad. Human not want to hurt Balrock but mean Ogres make him try. Balrock help human. Other ogres yell at Balrock so Balrock yell back and run from tribe and take human with Balrock. Balrock heal human. Balrock wize, know what shaman do when Balrock hurt before.” Human tell Balrock that shinies get stuff from humans. He call shinies money. Human try show Balrock different color shinies different value. All this make Balrock head hurt so tell human stop. Balrock not care what value when Balrock want thing from human he give pile of shinies make human happy. If human smile Balrock do good." "Balrock help human get better and take him to human home. Others, at human home scream at Balrock when see, many run. So Balrock leave human place. Man Balrock take home say goodbye he give Balrock pretty ring with shiny red rock (ring of protection +2). Balrock hug human but run when other human throw rock and hit Balrock in head. Balrock cry, only want be friend to human and get stuff.” “Balrock never know human name, maybe Balrock forget name.” The huge Ogre smiles, reminiscing of what one could conclude to a happy moment of his life. "Balrock walk places, but sometimes get lost. Big world, hard to know where is. Balrock like shinies. Balrock want find shinies and get good stuff. One day, Balrock meet big man on horse. Him have lot of shinies and shiny metal clothes and ring. Balrock want be like him. Human likes Balrock. Then Man say Balrock must be true and have big heart and be night and get called Sur Balrock.” Balrock sit up straight and juts out his huge chest with obvious pride as he relates what he considers great wisdom, “Me tell him Balrock big so already have big heart and Balrock tell truth almost all time. Balrock then say can already see at night! Man say okay, Balrock ready be night and man laugh (maybe him make joke; sometimes Balrock not know when people make joke). "Man say he name Toomass, (DM note: the man’s name is Sir Thomas but Balrock has trouble saying it correctly) and he teach Balrock tear, Balrock say ‘who tear?’ Balrock not cry?” “Toomass laugh (Balrock still not know joke). Toomass say T-Y-R God of jussts” stuttering trying to say the word correctly, “but Balrock not understand. Toomass say Balrock help human once so he help Balrock. Toomass teach Balrock about Tyr and show Balrock use warhammer and shield. Balrock learn more be good, help people maybe Balrock help more human then human not afraid of Balrock." Thomas was sent to find Balrock by the man he saved in the Ogre war pit the tale of “the friendly ogre” was beginning to spread. Balrock takes a huge gulp of his ale, probably enough to choke most humans but he gulps it down with ease, leaving several large drops down his front. He continues with his story obviously oblivious to the impending boredom of all who are listening, "One day Toomass leave and go all day, Toomass come back with big warhammer (same warhammer he currently carries), him say gift to Balrock. Balrock hug him, Toomass nice." “Balrock learn many things from Toomass, Balrock work hard, learn be good.” "Next day Balrock get up, see Toomass gone, him take all fight stuff, find note in human write, Balrock not read so find human to read for Balrock. It say Toomass go fight war, Balrock not to follow. Balrock want to fight war, Balrock good fighter. Next day Balrock go find Toomass." "During walk Balrock meet orcs, they want fight Balrock, Balrock say no, orc not do bad, orcs take Balrock and make fight in war pit. Balrock kill many orc but one strong as Balrock. Him hurt Balrock bad. Balrock get hit in face with club, loose eyes." "That night, Balrock pray to Tyr, like Toomass teach, ask show Balrock what do, then fall asleep and have dream, it show Balrock with human and other almost humans stop bad human, him evil and break law. Tyr point to town say go. In morning Balrock see again, but bandage still on, and Balrock no see any colors (Balrock is colorblind even if not using his darkvision). Balrock find all hurts go away. Balrock escape from orcs but lots orc die, Find orcs hitting animal so Balrock fight orcs and take animal. Balrock sorry kill orc. After leave orc place animal talk to Balrock, Why you talk? Animal say he Done Kee and he friend of Drew Id, Done Kee say thank you to Balrock and will be Balrock friend until find Drew Id.” Note to reader: The donkey was an awakened travel companion to an elven druid that was captured by the orcs. The druid managed to escape only 1 day before Balrock escaped. The dual escape is the reason the orcs were easy prey for Balrock after the druid softened up the defenses a bit. The druid planned to return for his friend but Balrock rescued him first. The druid later joined Balrock in his journey to the crypt of Tyr. The druid goes by the name of Kali but Balrock called him Drew. “Balrock and Done Kee travel to city in dream. Toomass must be there. Find Toomass and fight war. Toomass must be fighting evil human in dream." “Balrock go to big city place from dream. Many humans there and some almost human, Balrock see some very small humans they called ‘have lings’.” Balrock displays pride in his knowledge of the world. The man listening to him snickers trying to not laugh out loud. “There was more humans with funny ears, Toomass call them ‘ells’.” Balrock, at this point, is booming with such pride in his perceived ability to be smart. “A human with a necklace like Balrock’s come and say Tyr send him to find Balrock. Balrock ask human where Toomass? Human say no Toomass here yet but others are waiting for Balrock.” “Balrock meet others like in dream and human night say evil man was making no-deads. Him say no-deads bad. Balrock say he stop bad man if making no-deads not law.” “Done Kee say he see Drew Id with others. Balrock say to Done Kee You leave Balrock? Done Kee say no, Balrock new friend and go with Balrock and Drew Id. Balrock happy.” DM note: the high priest of Tyr has asked Balrock to accompany a group of adventurers to end the chaos caused by a necromancer in the crypt of Tyr. Kali is among the adventurers “Others with Balrock make joke about Balrock, This time Balrock know it joke. Hurt Balrock feelings but Balrock not get angry. Last time Balrock get angry when dad hurt mom and Balrock hurt dad. Get angry is bad. Balrock say he be night and one day get metal clothes like Toomass.” “The others make Balrock take care of Done Kee, they say to be night must first learn about Done Kee. Man who say that have metal clothes to so he must be night. Balrock know night when sees one. Toomass teach Balrock that night always say truth so Balrock do what night say.” “Balrock do good with Done Kee become Done Kee friend during walk to place of no-deads. Others not like Balrock they say things in funny talk Balrock want to learn funny talk but they not teach Balrock.” “At place of no-deads, human night say Balrock go first, Balrock see good in dark. Balrock bring Done Kee. Others follow Balrock into place. Balrock find giant room with lots of people with no skin and funny looking ell with black skin. Wonder why he paint skin black, maybe he not like being ell person. Black skin ell say for no-deads fight us. Balrock hold necklace with hammer and tell no-deads to go away. Some listen but most do not.” Balrock show night that Balrock fight good. Balrock kill many no-deads but when Balrock try to show night, night gone. Night leave with friends only Balrock and Done Kee and Drew Id left. Balrock fight hard; try to keep Done Kee alive but Done Kee die. Balrock get very angry and fight no-deads until all gone. Drew Id kill Black skin ell.” “Balrock cry and ask Tyr to bring Done Kee friend back. Then Balrock see bright light and Done Kee stand next to Balrock and Done Kee talk now to Balrock. Balrock hug Done Kee and say he sorry let Done Kee die. Balrock say to Tyr he sorry get angry.” DM mote after the fight Balrock reached the level of paladin to summon his special mount and the mount came in the form of a donkey. He does not realize that he summoned it he feels the donkey is his best friend in the whole world. Every morning he looks for the donkey and calls it without realizing he is actually summoning it. “Balrock and Drew Id go back to city and tell human shaman that no-deads gone. And Balrock show everybody that Done Kee talk. But Done Kee not talk to others he only talk to Balrock. Other say Balrock do good, and be night say sorry for make joke on Balrock. Human shaman of Tyr say Balrock now night.” At the last statement Balrock stands and proudly proclaims the fact that he is a knight. “Me and Done Kee still looking for Toomass to fight war together and show Toomass that Balrock now night. Balrock always look for more friends. Balrock one day be told he friend of humans.” The ogre pauses and thinks a few minutes, then asks his question, "Have you seen Toomass?" DM notes “ells” are how he pronounces elves, and “have lings” are what he calls halflings. The dark skin ell was a drow necromancer and was actually wounded by the adventuring group he was with but Balrock was so busy fighting the undead that he never noticed. He believes that the drow ran away because of his own bravery. Whenever he meets a halflings he always asks if he can see their “ling” this has led to many misunderstandings, as he actually believes that they “have” “lings” Role play notes: Balrock tries very hard to never get angry ever since his dad got angry and killed his mom he thinks that getting angry will cause someone he loves to die. If he ever does become angry he will feel deep regret. Also due to his rather unorthodox upbringing he has a unique form of spell casting. His sack that he calls his magic bag contains garbage (mostly dead rats) when he casts a spell he will pull trash from the bag and touch his hammer and ask Tyr for the necessary affect then apply the trash as appropriate for the spell to work. Typically to receive a cure light wounds spell one may be required to eat a raw dead rat. Also he may throw maggots on food to purify food and drink. This makes for a rather interesting role-play experience. Balrock may never find Thomas and what has become of him is yet to be discovered. Balrock never lies and he is naive a bit and believes that other never lie either. So until one proves they are untrustworthy Balrock will believe what they say. But he is smart enough to know right from wrong. Stats: Base Stats: STR: 11 DEX: 12 CON: 13 INT: 10 WIS: 14 CHA: 15 Final stats: STR: 23 / +6 (+10 Racial, +2 Magic) DEX: 10 / +0 (-2 Racial) CON: 22 / +6 (+4 racial, +1 level, +4 magic) INT: 6 / -2 (-4 Racial) WIS: 14 / +2 CHA: 12 / +1 (-4 Racial, +1 level) Basic and combat stats: Basics: Age: 28, Height: 9’ 9”, Weight: 616 Alignment: Lawful Good Size: Large Space/reach: 10’ / 10’ Deity: Tyr Darkvision 60’ Low-Light vision ECL: +2 Combat stats: AC: 26 (+3 Armor, +5 Shield, -1 size, +5 natural, +3 deflection, +1 insight [ioun stone]) HP: 114 (4d8 + 5d10 + 60) Base Attack: +9 / +4 Melee: +14 / +9 (+6 Str, -1 size) Range: +8 / +3 (-1 size) Grapple: +19 (+6 Str, +4 size +9 BAB) Init: +0 Attack: +2 Huge Warhammer (+15; 3d6+8; 20/x3; thundering (+2d8 sonic on Critical hit) Ranged attack: Sling (+8/+3; 1d6+6; 20/x2; range 50’) Full Attack: +15 / +10 (Warhammer) If using Warhammer two-handed add +3 to damage Saves Fortitude: +17 (+9 base, +6 con, +1 cha, +1 luckstone) Reflex: +5 (+3 base, +1 cha, +1 luckstone) Will: +7 (+3 base, +2 Wis, +1 cha, +1 luckstone) +6 vs. fear effects and +4 to resist intimidate attempts (Badge of valor and Paladin ability) Skills an feats: Skills: Diplomacy +3 (+1 Cha, +1 rank, +1 luckstone) Handle Animal +4 (+1 cha, +2 ranks, +1 luckstone) Knowledge (religion): +0 (-2 Int, +1 rank, +1 luckstone) Listen +6 (+2 Wis, +3 ranks, +1 luckstone) Sense Motive +5 (+2 Wis, +2 ranks, +1 luckstone) Spot +7 (+2 Wis, +4 ranks, +1 luckstone) Feats: Power attack (PHB 98) Weapon focus Warhammer (PHB 102) Shield Specialization heavy (PHB2 82) Monkey Grip (CW 103) Class abilities and spell casting: Strong Aura of good Turn Undead: 4/day, +1 attempt damage 2d6+4 (level 3) Detect Evil at will Smite evil 2/day +1 attack, +6 damage Divine Grace +1 all saves Lay hands (6 hp/day) Aura of Courage +4 Divine Health (immune to all diseases) Remove disease 1/week Divine Caster level 3 Special mount (Done Kee) Spells per day Paladin: caster level 3; Save DC 12 + spell level 1st: 2 Typically prepared: Cure light wounds, Divine Favor Summoned Mount: Stats from SRD Medium Animal Hit Dice: 4d8+4 (22 hp) Initiative:+2 Speed:30 ft. (6 squares) Armor Class:18 (+2 Dex, +6 natural), touch 12, flat-footed 14 Base Attack/Grapple:+3/+3 Attack:Bite +3 melee (1d2) Full Attack:Bite +3 melee (1d2) Space/Reach:5 ft./5 ft. Special Qualities: Low-light vision, scent, improved evasion Saves: Fort +9, Ref +6, Will +4 Abilities: Str 11, Dex 14, Con 12, Int 6, Wis 11, Cha 4 Skills: Balance +4, Listen +4, Spot +3 Feats: Endurance, Diehard These long-eared, horselike creatures are surefooted and sturdy. The statistics presented here could also describe burros. Carrying Capacity: A light load for a donkey is up to 50 pounds; a medium load, 51–100 pounds; and a heavy load, 101–150 pounds. A donkey can drag 750 pounds. Combat A donkey bites only when it has no way to escape. Skills: Donkeys have a +2 racial bonus on Balance checks level by level breakdown: Level 1: Giant 4 skill points: +2 listen, +2 spot Feat: Power attack Level 2: Giant 1 skill point: +1 spot Level 3: Giant 1 skill point: +1 listen Feat: Monkey Grip Level 4: Giant 1 skill point: +1 spot +1 Charisma Level 5: Paladin 1 skill point: +1 Knowledge Religion Level 6: Paladin 1 skill point: +1 Sense Motive Feat: Weapon Focus Warhammer Level 7: Paladin 1 skill point: +1 Diplomacy Level 8: Paladin 1 skill point: +1 Handle Animal +1 Constitution Level 9: Paladin 1 skill point: +1 Handle Animal Feat Shield Specialization (heavy) Level 10: Paladin 1 skill point: +1 Sense Motive Magic items: Magic Items “” = what Balrock calls it “Big hammer”; Warhammer +2 Thundering (gift from Toomass) (18,348gp) “Lucky rock”; Luckstone (Orc dropped it after Balrock killed it, was pretty and bring Balrock good luck) (20,000 gp) “Gloves git strong”; Gauntlets Ogre Power (stole from dad) (4000 gp) “My clothes”; MW Hide Armor (always had this since he left ogre tribe) (180gp) “Shield”; +2 heavy wooden Shield (Balrock got from dad but Toomass made it magic, Balrock does not know its magical) (4164gp) “Ring with red shiny red rock” Ring Protection +3 (Gift from mom before she died) (18,000gp) “Flying red rock”; Dusty Rose Ioun stone (Gift from Kali the druid for saving his donkey) (5000gp) “Pretty necklace” Amulet of Health +4 (got from Orc shaman after Balrock killed him) (16,000gp) “My medal”; Badge of Valor (award from Temple of Tyr for stopping the undead in the crypt) (1000gp) (Cadv 132) “My shoes”; Boots of Stomping (Balrock bought these from a traveling merchant He never used them yet and does not even know how to) (600gp) (SRD under psionics) “Drink stop poison” antitoxin (50gp) non magic equipment: Standard Equipment: Big Sling (0gp) Big Sack (large sack) (1sp) Extra clothes (peasants outfit) Bag of rags (healer kit) (50gp) Little sack (belt pouch) (1gp) Black pot (5sp) 10 big metal balls (lg. sling bullets) (2sp) Drink bag (waterskin) (1gp) Blanket (5sp) Animal ropes (bit/bridle) (2gp) Animal bags (pack saddle) (5gp) Done kee food (5 days) (1sp) More drink bags x3 (3gp) Blanket for Done kee (5sp) 4 metal balls (iron) (4sp) Dead animals (rations) (6 days) (3gp) (in bag labeled “Magick bag”) Long rope (50’) (1gp) Thingy for rope (grapple hook) (1gp) Money carried: Lots of Silver shinnies (75 sp and 20 pp) (to Balrock these look the same) Really lots of yellow shinnies (372 gp) Bunch of brown shinnies (66 cp) Pretty blue rock (blue azure) (25 gp value)
wrecan 02-26-07, 12:16 PM	Well, this competition is to create an actual PC, and the judges tend to look at it from the perspective of a DM. One item that DM's tend to enjoy is a good, ready-made villain for the PC. Zherog, especially, is always looking for a good villain. Part of his reasoning is that, by 12th level, you really should have enemies. While that is understandable, remember that my PC only has five actual class levels. The rest is Level Adjustment and Racial Hit Dice. So, really, he only has five levels of adventuring experience.
Zherog 02-26-07, 12:18 PM	List updated!
AmericanYeti 02-26-07, 03:51 PM	Name Sir Isaiah Heavenson, Captain in the Army of Mathasda ECL 12 Race Half-Celestial Elf Build Knight* 8 Height – 5’6” Weight – 139 lbs Age – 148 years old Deity – Heironeous LG Size and Type Medium Outsider (Native) Initiative +3 Languages – Celestial, Common, Dwarven, Elven Senses Darkvision 60 ft, Listen+1, Spot+1 Leadership Score 18 (12 from Level, +6 Charisma) (10th Level Cohort, 35 1st Level Followers, 3 2nd Level Followers, 1 3rd Level Follower, 1 4th Level Follower) Str 20 (14 Base, +4 Racial, +1@4th Level, +1@8th Level) (+5 Modifier) Dex 16 (12 Base, +4 Racial) (+3 Modifier) Con 14 (12 Base, +2 Racial) (+2 Modifier) Int 14 (12 Base, +2 Base) (+2 Modifier) Wis 12 (8 Base, +4 Racial) (+1 Modifier) Cha 23 (15 Base, +4 Racial, +4 Enchantment) (+6 Modifier) AC 28 (+8 Armor, +3 Shield, +3 Deflection, +1 Natural, +3 Dexterity) touch 17 (+3 Deflection, +1 Natural, +3 Dexterity) flat-footed 25 (+8 Armor, +3 Shield, +3 Deflection, +1 Natural) hp 73 (8 HD) Resist Immunity to Disease, Resistance to Acid 10, Cold 10 and Electricity 10, Damage Reduction 5/magic, Spell Resistance 18, +4 on Fortitude saves vs. Poison Melee +14/+10 (d8+6`/19-20x2, Arm of Heironeous) OR +14/+9 (d8+2d6+6/19-20x2, Arm of Heironeous vs Evil) Melee +13/+8 (d8+5/20x3, Lance) Melee +13/+8 (d4+5/19-20, Dagger) Ranged +12/+7 (d8+1/20x3, ) OR +14/+9 (d8+2d6+3/20x3, [i]Demonbane) Base Atk+8/+3; Grp +13 Fort +4 (+2 Base, +2 Ability) Ref +5 (+2 Base, +3 Ability) Will +7 (+6 Base, +1 Ability) Speed 30 feet/Fly 60 feet (Good Maneuverability) Special Qualities – Bulwark of Defense, Armor Mastery (Medium, Heavy), Vigilant Defender, Shield Ally Special Abilities – Knight’s Challenge 10/day, Fighting Challenge+2, Shield Block+1, Test of Mettle, Call to Battle Skills Diplomacy+11 (+5 Ranks, +4 Ability, +2 Synergy) Handle Animal+6 (+5 Ranks, +1 Ability) Intmidate+9 (+4 Ranks, +5 Ability) Jump+6 (+3 Ranks, +5 Ability, -2 Armor) Knowledge (Nobility and Royalty)+7 (+5 Ranks, +2 Ability) Knowledge (Religion)+6 (+4 Ranks, +2 Ability) Ride+16 (+11 Ranks, +3 Ability, +2 Synergy) Feats Combat Reflexes Leadership Mounted Combat Power Attack Spirited Charge Spell-Like Abilities At Will - Daylight 3/day – Protection from Evil 1/day - Aid, Cure Serious Wounds, Detect Evil, Fly, Holy Smite, Neutralize Poison, Remove Disease, Smite Evil Magic Items Arm of Heironeous (+1 Holy Longsword) (18,350 gp) Demonbane (+1 Longbow with Bane [Evil Outsider]) (8,400 gp) [i]Celestial Armor (22,400 gp) Ring of Protection+3(18,000 gp) Cloak of Charisma+4 (16,000 gp) Mundane Equipment Mithral Heavy Shield (1020 gp) 2 Daggers (4 gp) Lance (10 gp) Backpack (2 gp) 2 Square Yards of Canvas (2 sp) Map Case (1 gp) Flint and Steel (1 gp) Grappling Hook (1 gp) 5 Pints of Oil (5 sp) 3 Pitons (3 sp) 2 Belt Pouches (2 gp) 10 days of Trail Rations (5 gp) 100 feet of Silk Rope (20 gp) Sealing Wax (1 gp) Signal Whistle (8 sp) Signet Ring (5 gp) Spyglass (1,000 gp) 3 Flasks of Holy Water (75 gp) Traveler’s Outfit (1 gp) Barded Heavy Warhorse (1600 gp) 3 Saddlebags (12 gp) 20 days of Horse Feed (10 gp) Pack Saddle (5 gp) Mule (8 gp) 4 oz of Ink (32 gp) Inkpen (1 sp) Money 1033 gp 1 sp Goods on Person (Total Weight on Person=49.5 lbs [Light Load] Arm of Heironeous (8 lbs) Demonbane (3 lbs) Celestial Armor (20 lbs Ring of Protection+3 (-) Cloak of Charisma+4 (2 lbs) Mithral Heavy Shield (7.5 lbs) 1 Dagger (1 lb) Backpack (2 lbs) 2 Belt Pouches (1 lb) Signal Whistle (-) Signet Ring (-) Traveler’s Outfit (5 lbs) Goods on Mule (Total Weight on Mule=265.5 lbs [Medium Load] Dagger (1 lb) Lance (10 lbs) 2 Square Yards of Canvas (2 lbs) Map Case (1/2 lb) Flint and Steel (-) Grappling Hook (4 lbs) 5 Pints of Oil (5 lbs) 3 Pitons (3 lbs) 10 Days of Trail Rations (10 lbs) 100 feet of Silk Rope (10 lbs) Sealing Wax (1 lb) Spyglass (1 lb) 3 Flasks of Holy Water (3 lbs) Pack Saddle (15 lbs) 20 Days of Horse Feed (200 lbs) 4 oz of Ink (-) Inkpen (-) Level 1: Knight, Handle Animal+4, Knowledge (Religion)+2, Knowledge (Nobility and Royalty)+4, Ride+4 (16 skill ranks), +2 Will, Fighting Challenge+1, Knight’s Challenge, Knight’s Code, Combat Reflexes Level 2: Knight, Diplomacy+1, Intimidate+1, (4 skill ranks) Ride+1, +1 Will, Shield Block, Mounted Combat Level 3: Knight, Diplomacy+1, Handle Animal+1, Ride+1 (4 skill ranks), +1 Fort, +1 Ref, Bulwark of Defense, Power Attack Level 4: Knight, Diplomacy+1, Intimidate+1, Ride+1(4 skill ranks), +1 Will, Armor Mastery, Test of Mettle, +1 Strength Level 5: Knight, Diplomacy+1, Intimidate+1, Ride+1(4 skill ranks), Vigilant Defender, Spirited Charge Level 6: Knight, Intimidate+1, Jump+1, Knowledge (Religion)+1, Ride+1 (4 skill ranks), Ride+1, +1 Fort, +1 Ref, +1 Will, Leadership Level 7: Knight, Diplomacy+1, Jump+1, Ride+1 (4 skill ranks), Fighting Challenge+2 Level 8: Knight, Knowledge (Religion)+1, Jump+1, Ride+1 (4 skill ranks), +1 Will, Call to Battle, +1 Strength Background “Rise, Sir Isaiah Heavenson, son of Aravenn and Xanphia. You have been brought here before this court to account for your actions in the recent catastrophic Battle of Invarma Forest. You have been found guilty of insubordination, assaulting a superior officer as well as reckless endangerment of subordinates. First explain to the court where you come from and what happened to cause such a serious infraction on what is a previously immaculate record.” The Council of Fifteen loomed above Isaiah, their stares seemingly looking straight through his thoughts. He returned their gaze with a piercing stare into each of their eyes. Light streams through the round opening in the ceiling, illuminating Isaiah’s noble features. “My liege, as you know, I am Isaiah, Captain in the Army of Mathasda. I was born in the year 13,249, making me 148 years old. My father, Aravenn, was an Angel sent by Heironeous to aid our armies in the wars against the Orcs. He met my mother during the final siege of the First War, the Siege of Agron. She was a nurse tending to the wounded, and he was struck by a volley of Orcish arrows, and she barely kept him alive through his long, hard rehabilitation. During that time, they fell in love and I became of it. Because of my angelic heritage, I was treated much like a High Prince. I was given the best education and trained in the use of heavy arms and armor. Much to my mother’s distress, I was being groomed to become a warrior. My father managed to calm her, however, and I continued my training. During my fifteenth year, I grew wings. This thrilled my instructors to no end, as I developed a new tactical advantage. I spent endless hours training in aerial combat, as well as mounted and infantry warfare. When I was sixty, though, the Dwarves and the Elves were engaged in a series of border skirmishes. We hit them hard and drove them back to the mountains. Then, we reached there outer cities, and set up camp around one of the larger ones, Ozarak. When we inevitably swept into the city, we burnt it all to the ground. I was mortified. I handed in my resignation, pledging to myself that I would fight separately from the army so that I could combat those who would harm the innocent on my own terms. Riding back to the Elven capital, I returned to my parents’ house. Aravenn met me and when I told him of my quest, he gave me his sword, bow and armor. The sword, the Arm of Heironeous was a fine weapon, glowing with beautiful ruins that sought the blood of evildoers. His bow, Demonbanep was a magical longbow that proved lethal against all the Tan’ari. And his armor, the Celestial Armor was a magnificent suit of silver chainmail that was a ward against any attack. I rode out of the capital, ready to take on any challenge. After two days of riding, I saw a small village in flames. In the center of the village stood a great Orc chieftain, laughing as the marauders around him pillaged and burned. After slaying many of the marauders, I stood face-to-face with the chieftain, one of the Eyes of Gruumsh. I called out a challenge to the mighty beast and we fought. For an hour, we dueled until I finally struck him a mighty blow through his trunk. He roared in pain and fled. I attempted to pursue, but goblin raiders threatened the surviving villagers. One among them fought bravely, and it seemed that he could breathe fire as well, almost like one of the great Dragons. I joined him in combat, and together we defeated the marauding goblins. After the battle he removed his helm. He was not a small Elf at all, but actually a Dwarf! The villagers offered me a meal in one of the few surviving houses to offer me thanks for saving them. While we ate and drank, the Dwarf introduced himself as Lordok Jewelfinder. While we were initially weary of each other, we quickly warmed up to each other. I learned that he had an unnatural fascination with Dragons and that this had made him somewhat of an outcast among his fellow Dwarves. All he did now was travel the land, trying to learn more about Dragons and survive. He was, and still is a capable warrior and a good man, so I asked him to join me in my quest. He accepted, saying that he needed a real purpose in his life. We left the next morning heading east, ever further out of elven lands. For eighteen years, we wandered the planet, combating the forces of evil. We slew great dragons, hordes of raiding Goblins, terrible beasts and mighty warlords. Words of our exploits spread across the land. Against the blade of my sword and Lordok’s axe, no evil could stand. Then, eight months ago, I received an urgent telepathic message from my father. I was to return home at all haste, it seemed that a crisis had occurred. Lordok and I took off with all possible speed back towards elven lands, but we were still months’ travel away. When we finally arrived in Agron, my father explained to me what happened. A fraction of this very council had broken off, and was now planning to sever the boundaries between the Abyss. They had forged a pact with several powerful Balors and were now seeing that they unleash hell on earth. With great reluctancy, we elves called on the dwarves for aid. We needed to look past all of our differences and work together to stave off destruction. I was required to follow the army and Lordok elected to come with me. We had grown quite close over the years and were now like brothers. During the evening before we were to leave, a poor, tired elf arrived at my door. He told me that out of gratitude for the deeds we had done over the years, all the able men in his village would fight for me in the battle. I now had my own, small infantry division to command. The elf went by the name of Irador and was himself a fledgling wizard, the sage of his village. He brought with him thirty-nine able Elves to fight with him. Among them were his brother, Rishmal, a fearsome warrior by any means and his daughter, Urmaer, a priestess of Corellon Larethian. We marched for eight weeks north until we came to the Fields of Planar Confusion, where the ritual was to be held. Off to the west, camp fires could be spotted, but far to many for nine mages and the ritual was not complete yet. We sent scouts to investigate and slept. When we awoke next morning before dawn, an Orc army was standing-by to attack. Our army scrambled to deploy, and my barely trained troops would soon have to prove themselves on the field of battle. The Orcs charged first and there was much carnage. Lordok and I were separated during the confusion and I had to rely on Rishmal for support. Irador was furiously casting spells and Urmaer aided the wounded, but the battle went poorly. All of a sudden, I came to meet an old adversary: the Eye of Gruumsh from Lordok’s village! I called out a challenge so that we might finish our duel, but he scorned me, saying ‘Eggha Ug-Gruumsh is far beyond you, puny Elf!’ I flew into an aggressive, ill conceived rage and we clashed in the middle of the swirling maelstrom of combat. Even as the Elves around me fled in defeat and my unit retreated, scattered, we fought. He was larger, but no stronger than I and neither of us could find an advantage. Then, his massive axe struck me on the arm, and then the leg knocking me to the ground. As Eggha prepared a killing blow, there came a roar and a great spout of flame. Lordok ploughed through a group of Orcs, throwing himself between Eggha and myself. Caught by surprise, Eggha was driven back and was forced into retreat. Lordok and I barely managed to escape the fury of the Orcs as we ran back to our camp. We ran just as the sun cleared the horizon which drove the Orcs back. I had was severely wounded by Eggha and had to recuperate. Irador came to me in my tent. We had lost twenty men in the past battle. However, we still had to thwart the rogue mages and I was out of commission. The army, led by the most powerful wizards in the country, charged the circle of mages, but it was too late. A great rift opened in between the Abyss and the Material plane and a great demonic army spilled out, sweeping over the Elven army. They fought fiercely, but we had to fall back to Mathasda. With my wounds, I had to be teleported back by the wizards, and I couldn’t accompany the army back. On a stroke of luck, the demons decided that it was an opportune time for infighting and civil war. Apparently, the rogues could not control the more powerful of the demons which bought the army valuable time to return to Agron. We prepared for the inevitable attack on our lands. The Forster Division was deployed throughout Invarma Forest and the Wizard’s College set about making the lands impassable for even the mightiest demons that were set to pour into our fair country. The royal clerics healed my wounds, returning me to fighting strength. I set out to replace my losses. When the soldiers were replaced, I now had 20 woodsmen as well as just standard infantry. We spent twelve hours a day drilling for weeks and now I had what could be called a viable infantry unit. This happened just as our sentries reported that the demons were en route to Agron. However, they would have to cross through Invarma Forest, the largest forest in the world. Our Foresters were devastatingly effective at stopping armies. I, as well as my unit of followers and Lordok were officially drafted into the army. On the northern fronts, the Dwarves were engaged in brutal combat with the demons. But the demons, as well as a host of Orcs, were rapidly moving across our lands. We marched out to the Invarma Forests and deployed in a long line so that we could stop any demons from punching through with blitzkriegs, but the line had to be strong enough so that it could actually stop any demons. Lordok and I spoke for hours just about the past years and our time fighting what now seemed like petty evils. But they weren’t. Every town, every person that we saved was well worth the days of sheer riding. Then, the evil horde hit us. Lordok and I were inseparable this time, staying within five feet of each other and cleaving our way through the demons and Orcs. The Arm of Heironeous carved a great, bloody through any who stood before me, and Lordok’s draconic powers were a terrifying sight to behold. Around us, the elves who had volunteered their lives for me fought ferociously, but Irador was having trouble with the demons’ ability to resist his spells and he was beginning to run low. During a lull in the charges, he had to pull back. We now were lacking any magical support except for Urmaer. She, while a magical beacon, was a capable warrior and had her hands full with the surrounding enemies. Then, a dreaded Marilith approached. She directed her troops with skill and precision, and they began to drive us back. Suddenly, when all seemed lost, a division of Foresters appeared out of nowhere and killed the demons who pressed us. Facing grievous losses, the Marilith retreated. I thanked the foresters, but they had already disappeared. I was concerned with the strange absence of Eggha. I had expected him to seek me out: we had unfinished business. The next day, the demons came on full force, and we just held them back. After several hours, it was clear that we were not going to be able to hold them at our end. A Major found me and I expected to be told that I was going to receive reinforcements but he told me to pull back, that we would try to defend the plains. I refused, saying that our best chance was in the forest, where we could surprise them around every corner. He tried to grab me, and I punched him. He recoiled and snarled a curse at me. Then, he left, probably to report me. I rallied my troops for a final charge. We would have to break them that time. It failed, and we pulled back, retreating with the rest of the army. I hated abandoning the Foresters, especially after how they had aided us, but I saw no choice. We had lost the Battle for Invarma and I was now a criminal. I was summoned here to answer to you and I have. I must return to the field, the horde is almost at our gates!” The council discussed Isaiah’s future for hours. Seven of the council wanted to suspend him from duty, seven wanted to allow him to continue fighting. Only the head remained. “You are hereby suspended from active military duty for your crimes. You are prohibited from entering any camp of the military or serving under any official Elven banner. However, there is nothing we can do to stop you from fighting independently save warning you that it means certain death.” “Very well, my liege. May I send a message to the army, though? I must contact Lordok as well as the rest of my unit. They have no purpose in this war without me.” “You may. What would you have the message say to them?” “Tell them that they may return to their homes and request for Lordok to return to Agron. And now, I must be off!” With great fluttering, Isaiah spread his wings and burst out of the open ceiling of the court to go meet his fate… Physical Appearance and Personality traits Isaiah is tall for an elf, but is still not large. He stands at a meager 5’6” and weighs but 139 lbs. His features are noble and statuesque, with a pronounced chin and nose. His blue eyes flash with confidence and his long, golden hair flows around his shoulders. While he is not tall, he is broad and powerful with well defined muscles rippling around his body. The area around him seems to glow with celestial energy. Two great, feathered wings fold out from his back, but he often folds them back so that he can hide who he is. He carries himself proudly, but without arrogance. At his side is a mighty sword, and slung across his back is a powerful looking bow, under which is a silvery looking broad shield, hard as iron. Isaiah is a great altruist. He cares for people with no regard for himself. Deeply loyal, Isaiah would never betray a friend, even if it contradicts his better judgment. He is not boastful, but is very proud and will never let a dishonor pass. He seeks renown as well as to help those in need, and is easily capable of winning it, with his distinct parentage and mighty deeds. Isaiah is valorous and brave and has no fear. All around him, people follow him with real dedication, as they are simply drawn to him and his effortless charisma. Tactics Isaiah is a master of single combat. He will often seek out the most powerful foe that he can find and challenge him to a duel. He will start on horseback, charging with his lance. When it shatters, he will draw his sword. He will then dismount. Power Attacking relentlessly, he attempts to overrun his opponent, Shield Blocking his opponent. While he fights, Lordok will often run interference, fighting off any who would threaten Isaiah. When in battle, however, Isaiah will try to keep his companions alive, with his Knightly special abilities. Together with Lordok, he stands as a bastion of defense. Also a potent archer, Isaiah uses his bow against demons, because of its demon killing powers. He rarely flies in combat, believing that he should stay on the same level of his opponent. Against flying enemies, though, he is quite an aerial combatant. When he fights someone whom he considers a personal enemy, though, he fights like an enraged beast, overpowering any who stand before him with his great strength and heaven’s might. Lordok Jewelfinder: Male Dwarf Dragon Shaman 10, Totem Dragon: Brass, high ranks in Survival, wields a great magic axe Irador: Male Elf Wizard 4, specializes in Divination, prohibited schools are Necromancy or Conjuration Rishmal: Male Elf Barbarian 3 Urmaer: Female Elf Cleric 2 Elven Villager: 20 Elf Scouts (Level 1), 16 Elf Fighters (Level 1) (Scouts armed with Shortbows, 30 arrows, shortswords, Fighters have longswords, scale-mail and light steel shield) Eggha Ug-Gruumsh: Orc Barbarian 6/Eye of Gruumsh 7 Foresters: Elf Rogue 4/Ranger 2, Armed with a shortbow, 30 arrows, dagger, and spears * Player’s Handbook II Whew! Just in time!
Kit_the_Odd 02-26-07, 05:06 PM	Don, Key Hotay of Lamancha Donato Hotay was born in the village of Lamancha to a family of the minor nobility. The title Key was bestowed on Don’s great-grandfather, Wardler. The Key Hotay, or heir of the Hotay family, was given a small grant of land near the country village of Lamancha. Don, Key Hotay lived most of his life as a quiet country gentleman, surrounded by the books of his library. He loved the stories of ancient heroes and great adventurers, but was generally content to join their ranks in imagination alone. Until the summer of his 30th year. That year his town was attacked by a raiding party of orcs. Don fought as bravely as anyone but was struck down early in the fight by a blow to the head. While he did recover fully it was a difficult healing process. At one point he spent several days babbling incoherently with what the local healer called ‘brain fever’. When he was finished healing Don spent several days alone in his library. When he emerged he was dressed in a mismatch of historical armor and weapons. He declared that he would no longer sit still an let evil run amok in the world but that he would follow the example of his literary heroes and ‘do something about it’. This began the period that people of Lamancha call “The Adventuring Daze”. Don spent a number of years wandering the land. He spent some time with several different adventuring groups, but his eccentricities kept him from finding a permanent place with any of them. He was a nice enough team mate, but his constant chattering about honor and quests for good made him seem like an annoying cross between a noble fop and a stiff-backed paladin. After one very bad battle his teammates brought him back to Lamancha to recover from wounds before leaving him alone, again. The people of the town knew Don quite well as he visited occasionally and had donated some moderately large sums of his money to help with civic projects. It was during this recovery that Don met San Cho. San was a halfling who had come to town not long before. Because he didn’t have a job at the time, the villagers convinced him to work as an attendant and butler for the Key Hotay. They hoped that this latest wound, plus having a helper, would convince Don to stay home. It didn’t work. Instead Don was able to sway San Cho into following him back out into the world in search of glory, honor, and riches. San is much more level headed than Don and has often kept the duo out of trouble by either talking Don out of over-zealous plans or smoothing things over with the locals after one of Don’s escapades. But the promise of noble recognition and treasure, along with a lot of stories about famous halflings, were enough to convince San Cho to sign on as Don, Key Hotay’s squire. In general they make a pretty good team, with Don coming up with the plans, and San making sure they will actually work. For instance, there was the time they defeated the giants that were disguised as windmills. The giants had been preying on the area of Gardensburg for some time, but no one was able to find them. Don was able to see through the illusion that hid them in plain sight as windmills. And by rallying the locals and recruiting some adventurers they were able to defeat the giants and free Gardensburg from their raiding. Unfortunately, Don nearly burned down every other large building in the area ‘just in case’. San had to hang on to Don’s ankles to slow him down long enough to talk sense into him. Many people they have met wonder how San can put up with Don’s antics. The fact is that Don is not without common sense, he just doesn’t listen to it. Other than getting carried away, Don is a very good guy and treats San very well. Two things of significant impact have occurred in the last 5 years. First, shortly after Don’s 40th birthday he recovered a remarkable weapon after an encounter with a dragon. This weapon was an intelligent magic rapier, named Cyrano. Cyrano fit in very well with Don and San, as he was a bit honor and glory obsessed himself, as well as being a poet. Many of Don’s foes in the last years have been shocked to hear poetry being recited by Don’s blade as they fought. Especially since the poetry was quite good. Second is Don’s encounter with the Primal Music. The group was clearing out an ancient dungeon along with some other adventurers. One of the other group called himself a “Seeker of the Song” and introduced Don to what he called the Primal Music. For the first time Don felt like his goal of honor and glory had a more specific direction and meaning. As Don has sought a closer connection with the Primal Music he has actually become less prone to getting on trouble. Not that his ideas and schemes are any less grandiose, but with a more specific focus he is more likely to pay closer attention to the details. Don is a kindly looking, but weather-beaten, older gentleman with tan and wrinkled skin. His hair is black with streaks of grey and he sports an impressive moustache and goatee in matching colors. The corners of his hairline are receding significantly. He stands 6 feet even and weighs about 150 lbs. He is 45 years old (middle aged). San Cho – Don’s stalwart ‘squire’. A halfling rogue that has, at least partly, embraced Don’s dreams of glory and honor. Cyrano – Don’s sentient sword. A fighter AND a lover. As much as he can be anyway. The people of Gardensburg – They remember Don and will welcome him gladly. And they will keep him away from any torches while they are at it. Other adventurers – Don has made many contacts in his years of wandering. Most of them will be friendly, if watchful. Lamancha – The people of Don’s home see him kind of like a favorite, crazy, old uncle. Most everybody likes him even if they think he is a bit odd. Plus he is nice and helpful. Enemies It wouldn’t be hard at all to find someone that didn’t like Don, Key Hotay. While he has rarely been cruel or caused problems deliberately, he has been the source of many difficulties. Don and San could join just about any good adventuring group. He will work best for a group that is willing to put up with his flights of fancy, although he doesn’t do that as much as he used to. Also, despite having a home in Lamancha, both are willing to travel where ever they need to go. Don, Key Hotay Human Male Bard 10/Seeker of the Song 2 NG Middle-aged Starting Abilities: STR: 11 (3 pts) DEX: 15 (8 pts) CON: 12 (4 pts) INT: 10 (2 pts) WIS: 9 (1 pts) CHA: 16 (10 pts) Current Abilities (w/o gear): STR: 10 (-1 age) DEX: 16 (+1 lvl 4, +1 lvl 8, -1 age) CON: 12 (+1 lvl 12, -1 age) INT: 11 (+1 age) WIS: 10 (+1 age) CHA: 17 (+1 age) Current Abilities (w gear): STR: 10 DEX: 20 (+4 Gloves of Dexterity) CON: 14 (+2 Amulet of Health) INT: 11 WIS: 10 CHA: 19 (+2 Cloak of Charisma) HP: 68.5 (6 + 11d6 +24) AC: 26 (+8 armor, +3 shield, +5 Dex) + Light Fortification (25% chance of critical & sneak attack failing) BAB: +8/+3 (Grapple +8, Melee +8, ranged +13) Init: +9 (+5 Dex, +4 Improved Initiative) Fort: +7 (+3 Bard, +2 Con, +2 Vest of Resistance) Ref: +14 (+7 Bard, +5 Dex, +2 Vest of Resistance) Will: +12 (+7 Bard, +3 Paladin, +2 Vest of Resistance) Speed: 30ft/x4 Attack: +1 keen shock Rapier (Cyrano) +14/+9 (+8 BAB, +5 Dex (Weapon Finesse), +1 enhancement)), 1d6 + 1 + 1d6 electricity, 15-20/x2 Shortbow +13/+8, 1d6, 20/x3 Feats: 1st: Improved Initiative 1st(Human): Skill Focus (Perform – sing) 3rd: Weapon Finesse 6th: Leadership 9th: Ironskin Chant [Complete Adventurer, pg. 113] 12th: Wandstrike [Complete Arcane, pg. 84] Class Abilities: Proficient light armor & all shields (except tower) Proficient all simple weapons, longsword, rapier, sap, shortbow, composite shortbow, shortsword, and whip Can cast Bard spells in light armor w/o spell failure Bardic Knowledge (1d20+12) Bardic & Seeker Music (12/day) Bardic Music: Countersong, Fascinate, Inspire Courage (+2), Inspire Competence, Suggestion, Inspire Greatness Seeker Music: Burning Melody, Burning Melody Refrain (DC 25), Song of Unmaking Rapture of the Song - +2 AC while using bardic or seeker music Combine Songs – Start and maintain 2 bardic/seeker music effects simultaneously Note: Seeker of the Song prestige class is from Complete Arcane, pg. 56. Spells per Day – Bard 3/4/4/3/1 Bard Spells Known: 0 – Detect Magic, Ghost Sound(DC 14), Mage Hand, Mending (DC 14), Open/Close (DC 14), Prestidigitation 1 – Expeditious Retreat, Grease, Inspirational Boost, Phantom Threat (DC 15) 2 – Invisibility, Mirror Image, Sonic Weapon, Whirling Blade 3 – Cure Serious Wounds, Dirge of Discord (DC 17), Dispel Magic, Haste 4 – Greater Invisibility, Resonating Bolt (DC 18) Spell Casting Notes: Non-PHB Spells: Inspirational Boost, Sonic Weapon, & Dirge of Discord (Complete Adventurer) Phantom Treat (Complete Warrior) Whirling Blade, Resonating Bolt (Complete Arcane) Skills: Climb: +3 (+4 ranks, -1 ACP) Concentration +15 (+13 ranks, +2 Con) Diplomacy: +8 (+4 ranks, +4 Cha) Know(arcana): +13 (+13 ranks) Know(history): +6 (+6 ranks) Listen: +5 (+5 ranks) Move Silently +9 (+5 ranks, +5 Dex, -1 ACP) Perform(sing): +22 (+15 ranks, +4 Cha, +3 Skill Focus) Spellcraft: +5 (+5 ranks) - +2 synergy on scrolls from UMD Spot: +0 Swim –1 (+1 rank, -2 ACP) Tumble +18 (+14 ranks, +5 Dex, -1 ACP) Use Magic Dev.: +18 (+14 ranks, +4 Cha) Languages: Common All prices in gp. Weapons and Armor Cyrano, intelligent +1 keen shock rapier, 25820 Mithril Breastplate +3 Glammered, 15900 Mithril Buckler +2 Light Fortification, 10015 Magic Items Vest of Resistance +2, 4000 Gloves of Dexterity +4, 16000 Cloak of Charisma +2, 4000 Amulet of Health +2, 4000 Magic Spell Component Pouch, 5 Wands scorching ray (25 charges), 2250 burning hands (full), 750 chill touch (full), 750 ray of enfeeblement (full), 750 touch of idiocy (10 charges), 900 Heward’s Handy Haversack, 2000 Jumping Caltrops, 150 Mundane stuff Light Warhorse, 150 military saddle , 20 saddlebags, 4 Bedroll, 0.1 Winter blanket , .5 Candle, 0.01 Map case, 1 Chalk, 0.01 Fishhook, 0.1 flask (empty), 0.03 Flint and steel, 1 Grappling Hook, 1 Hammer, 0.5 Ink, 8 Inkpen, 0.1 hooded lantern, 7 mirror, 10 mug, 0.02 paper (sheet), 0.4 parchment (sheet), 0.2 Iron Pot, 0.5 Trail Rations /day, 0.5 Silk rope (50 ft), 10 Sack, 0.1 sealing wax, 1 soap 1lb, 0.5 shovel, 2 tent, 10 torch, 0.01 waterskin, 1 whetstone, 0.02 climber's kit, 80 Clothing explorer's outfit, free at creation entertainer's outfit, 3 Total 87602.6gp Cash 397gp 3sp 10cp 1st – Bard 1 - Feats: Imp. Init, Skill Focus (Perform-sing)(Human) – Skills: Concentration 4, Knowledge(arcana) 4, Knowledge(history) 4, Perform(sing) 4, Spellcraft 4, Tumble 4, UMD 4 2nd – Bard 2 – Skills: Concentration 1, Knowledge(arcana) 1, Knowledge(history) 1, Perform(sing) 1, Spellcraft 1, Tumble 1, UMD 1 3rd – Bard 3 – Feat: Weapon Finesse – Skills: Concentration 1, Knowledge(arcana) 1, Knowledge(history) 1, Listen 1, Perform(sing) 1, Tumble 1, UMD 1 4th – Bard 4 – Dex Increased – Skills: Concentration 1, Knowledge(arcana) 1, Listen 1, Move Silently 1, Perform(sing) 1, Tumble 1, UMD 1 5th –Bard 5 – Skills: Concentration 1, Knowledge(arcana) 1, Listen 1, Move Silently 1, Perform(sing) 1, Tumble 1, UMD 1 6th –Bard 6 – Feat: Leadership – Skills: Concentration 1, Knowledge(arcana) 1, Listen 1, Move Silently 1, Perform(sing) 1, Tumble 1, UMD 1 7th – Bard 7 – Skills: Concentration 1, Knowledge(arcana) 1, Listen 1, Move Silently 1, Perform(sing) 1, Tumble 1, UMD 1 8th – Bard 8 – Dex Increased - Skills: Concentration 1, Knowledge(arcana) 1, Move Silently 1, Perform(sing) 1, Swim 1,Tumble 1, UMD 1 9th – Bard 9 – Feat: Ironskin Chant - Skills: Climb 2, Concentration 1, Knowledge(arcana) 1, Perform(sing) 1, Tumble 1, UMD 1 10th – Bard 10 – Skills: Climb 2, Concentration 1, Knowledge(arcana) 1, Perform(sing) 1, Tumble 1, UMD 1 11th – Bard 10/Seeker 1- Skills: Diplomacy 2, Perform(sing) 1, Tumble 1 (cross class), UMD 1 (cross class) 12th – Bard 10/Seeker 2 – Con Increased – Feat: Wandstrike – Skills: Diplomacy 2, Perform(sing) 1, Tumble 1 (cross class), UMD 1 (cross class) San Cho Male Halfling Rogue 10 He is a loyal squire and friend to Don. His common sense generally helps keep them out of trouble, but he has been talked into crazy things by Don in the past. Cyrano Intelligent +1 Keen Shock Rapier Think Cyrano de Bergerac as a sword. He is brash, proud, and arrogant, as well as honorable, loyal, and brave. Int 14, Cha 14, Wis 10 Speaks Common 30ft vision & hearing Bless 3/day Hold person 3/day Ego Score: 9 Based of “Bosk, the Poetic Blade” from DMG. Changed to rapier, changed +2 to +1 keen and added shock for 10,000gp more (difference from +2 to +3)
Kit_the_Odd 02-26-07, 05:07 PM	Woo hoo, squeeked in under the wire. And started a new page! Yea me.:D
Zherog 02-26-07, 08:20 PM	List updated! And the deadline has passed...
Seeking_Knight_of_Graves 02-26-07, 08:43 PM	Nooooooooooooooooo. I just missed it. Darn. Oh well there is always the next time. I must say that all of you do a damn good job at it. I know for sure that I may use some characters in my module because of how good the idea is. Keep up the good work. And till next time!
Endarrion 02-26-07, 09:32 PM	Roscoe and Brick Roscoe Tosscobble CN male halfling Rogue 8, Thief-Acrobat 4 (TA pg 83 of Complete Adventurer) Height: 3’ 3” Weight: 37lbs Deity: None Languages: Common, Halfling, Orc, Elven. AC: 28 (8armor + 2deflection + 5dex + 1size + 2dodge agile fighting) Flat footed: 28 (+8armor + 2def + 1size + 5dex + 2dodge) Touch: 20 (2def + 5dex + 1size + 2dodge) HP: 42 Speed: 20ft Initiative: +7 Leadership Score: 15 (level 12 + 4 Cha – 1 different align.) For Followers: 15 (lvl 12 + 4Cha – 1 moves around a lot) Ability Scores Base Strength: 10 Dexterity: 16 Constitution: 10 Intelligence: 14 Wisdom: 10 Charisma: 18 (+1 levels 4, 8, 12) Current Strength: 10 Dexterity: 20 (+4gloves) Constitution: 10 Intelligence: 14 Wisdom: 10 Charisma: 18 Attacks Base Attack: +9/+4 Grapple: +9 Sneak Attack: +4d6 (6d6 w/ Seeker) Seeker: +16/+11 (1d6 +1/ 19-20x2) +1 attack and damage within 30ft MW Short Sword: +11/+6 (1d4/ 19-20x2) Special: +1 racial bonus with thrown weapons or slings. Saves Fortitude: +4 (3base + 1racial) Reflex: +14 (10base + 3Dex + 1racial) +2 vs. traps Will: +8 (3base + 4Cha* + 1racial) *Force of Personality +2 Morale vs. Fear (racial) Skills (142 total) Balance: +15 (8ranks + 5Dex + 2synergy) Bluff: +12 (8ranks + 4Cha) Climb: +10/12 (8ranks + 2synergy w/ropes + 2racial) Diplomacy: +11 (5ranks + 4Cha + 2synergy) Disable Device: +13 (8ranks + 5Dex) Escape Artist: +13/15 (8ranks + 5Dex + 2synergy w/ropes) Gather Information: +14 (8ranks + 4Cha + 2synergy) Hide: +15 (10ranks + 5Dex) Jump: +11 (7ranks + 2synergy + 2racial) Knowledge (local): +7 (5ranks + 2Int) Listen: +8 (6ranks + 2racial) Move Silently: +24 (12ranks + 5Dex + 5silent moves chain shirt + 2racial) Open Lock: +20 (15ranks + 5Dex) Search: +10 (8ranks + 2Int) Sleight of Hand: 16 (9ranks + 5Dex + 2synergy) Spot: +4 (4ranks) Tumble: +15 (8ranks + 5Dex + 2synergy) Use Rope: +10/12 (5ranks + 5Dex + 2synergy for bindings) Feats Force of Personality* -add cha to will saves Point Blank Shot -+1 att/dam within 30ft Precise Shot -no penalty for shooting into melee Quick Reconnoiter* -Spot and Listen as free actions, +2 Init. Rapid Reload -Reload Lt. Cross. as free action *Complete Adventurer Class Abilities Rogue: Sneak Attack 4d6, trapfinding, Evasion (no damage on successful save), Trap Sense + 2 (ref. saves and AC vs. traps), Improved Uncanny Dodge (never flanked except by level 12 rogue or higher, retain Dex when flat-footed). Thief Acrobat: Fast Acrobatics (Balance and Tumble at full speed w/o penalty, Climb at half speed w/o penalty), Kip Up (Stand up from prone as free action), Steady Stance (not flat-footed while balancing or climbing, add class level to those when taking damage), Agile Fighting +2/+3 (dodge/fighting defensively, no penalty when kneeling, sitting, or prone), Slow Fall 30ft, Acrobatic Charge (diff. terrain and through allies), Defensive Roll 1/day (ref. save for half dam. from lethal blow), Skill Mastery ( take 10 on balance, climb, jump, and tumble). Equipment +1 Light Crossbow of Deadly Precision (Seeker)* 18,335gp +4 Mithral Chain Shirt of Silent Moves 20,850gp Boots of Speed 12,000gp Gloves of Dexterity 16,000gp Ring of Protection +2 8,000gp Heward’s Handy Haversack 2,000gp (Brick carries this) MW Short Sword 310gp 20 Crossbow Bolts 2gp Listening Cone 20gp* Thieves’ Tools, Longspoon, MW* 150gp Thieves’ Tools, MW 100gp Grappling Hook 1gp Rope, Silk (50ft) 10gp Various Investments and Favors** 10,000gp *Complete Adventurer **See Background LEFT OVER: 222gp TOTAL: 88,000gp Level Breakdown Rogue 1-8 Thief Acrobat* 9-12 *Complete Adventurer pg 83 Level 1 (40)Skills: Balance 4 ranks, Bluff 2 ranks, Climb 2 ranks, Hide 4 ranks, Listen 4 ranks, Move Silently 4 ranks, Open Lock 4 ranks, Search 4 ranks, Sleight of Hand 4 ranks, Tumble 4 ranks, Use Rope 4 ranks. Feat: Force of Personality (Complete Adventurer) Level 2 (10)Skills: Bluff 5ranks, Climb 5 ranks, Hide 5 ranks, Move Silently 5 ranks, Open Lock 5 ranks, Use Rope 5 ranks. Level 3 (10)Skills: Bluff 6 ranks, Climb 6 ranks, Disable Device 3 ranks, Knowledge (local) 5 ranks. Feat: Point Blank Shot Level 4 (10)Skills: Balance 7 ranks, Bluff 7 ranks, Diplomacy 3 ranks, Open Lock 7 ranks, Spot 1 rank. Level 5 (10)Skills: Balance 8 ranks, Bluff 8 ranks, Diplomacy 5 ranks, Escape Artist 3 ranks, Gather Information 3 ranks. Level 6 (10)Skills: Escape Artist 4 ranks, Gather Information 5 ranks, Jump 3 ranks, Listen 6 ranks, Open Lock 9 ranks. Feat: Precise Shot Level 7 (10)Skills: Gather Information 7 ranks, Hide 8 ranks, Move Silently 7 ranks, Sleight of Hand 7 ranks. Level 8 (10)Skills: Gather Information 8 ranks, Move Silently 9 ranks, Open Lock 11 ranks, Sleight of Hand 9 ranks, Spot 4 ranks. Level 9 (8)Skills: Hide 10 ranks, Jump 5 ranks, Open Lock 12 ranks, Move Silently 12 ranks. Feat: Quick Reconnoiter (Complete Adventurer) Level 10 (8)Skills: Climb 8 ranks, Escape Artist 6 ranks, Search 7 ranks, Open Lock 13 ranks. Level 11 (8)Skills: Escape Artist 8 ranks, Jump 7 ranks, Open Lock 14 ranks, Tumble 6 ranks, Search 8 ranks. Level 12 (8)Skills: Disable Device 8 ranks, Open Lock 15 ranks, Tumble 8 ranks. Feat: Rapid Reload Brick TN male half-orc Rogue 4, Fighter 6 Racial Mods: +2 Str, -2 Int and Cha, Darkvision, Orc Blood. Height: 7’0” Weight:350lbs Languages: Common, Orc. AC: 19 (5armor + 3Dex + 1shield) Flat-footed: 15 (5armor + 1shield) Touch: 13 (3Dex) Dodge +1 to one opponent HP :63 Speed: 20ft (30base) Initiative: +7 (3Dex + 4Imp. Init.) Abilities Str: 20 (+ 2gauntlets + 2racial) Dex: 16 (+1 4th lvl + 1 8th lvl) Con: 14 Int: 8 (-2racial) Wis: 12 Cha: 6 (-2racial) Attacks Base Attack Bonus: +9 Grapple: +13 Sneak Attack: 2d6 Full Attack: +1 Longsword +13/+8 (1d8 +6/ 19-20x2) +1 Battleaxe +13 (1d8 +3/ 20x3) – offhand Saves Fort: +8 (6base + 2Con) Will: +4 (3base + 1Wis) Ref: +9 (6base + 3Dex) trapsense +1 Skills (55total) Climb: +7 (5ranks + 5Str – 3armor) Intimidate: +11 (13ranks – 2Cha) Jump: +17 (13ranks + 5Str – 3armor + 2synergy) Listen: +8 (7ranks + 1Wis) Sense Motive: +11 (10ranks + 1Wis) Tumble: +9 (7ranks + 3Dex – 3armor + 2synergy) Feats 1st: Power Attack (up to +9 one-handed or +18 two-handed) 3rd: Dodge 5th: Two-Weapon Fighting 6th: Oversized Two-Weapon Fighting* 6th: Improved Initiative 8th: Two-Weapon Defense (+1shield/ +2total defense) 9th: Cleave 10th: Great Cleave *Complete Adventurer Equipment (Based on NPC gear value pg 127) +1 Battleaxe 2,310gp +1 Longsword 2,315gp Gauntlets of Ogre Power 4,000gp Masterwork Breastplate 350gp LEFT OVER: 1,025gp TOTAL: 16,000gp Class Abilities Rogue: Sneak Attack 2d6, trapfinding, Evasion, Trap sense +1, Uncanny dodge Fighter: 4 feats Level Breakdown Rogue 1-4 Fighter 5-10 Appearance and Personality Roscoe Age: 55 Roscoe is a bit tall for a halfling at 3’3” but weighs a lithe 37lbs. He has mid-length black hair that the keeps pushed back from his face and long sideburns. He wears a vest over his mithral chain shirt and carries his crossbow slung over his shoulder. He favors simple, comfortable clothing that allows him to move easily. Roscoe has an easy going attitude that hides his very serious nature. He can joke and laugh with the regulars at the tavern, all the while running through plans and schemes in his mind. Brick One word to describe brick is “imposing.” He towers head and shoulder over most others and has rock-hard muscles. He usually wears loose trousers and no shirt, except when danger is expected, at which time he wears his breastplate. He always carries his longsword and battleaxe. Brick has the personality of his namesake. He speaks little and laughs less. He is very serious and insightful. What he lacks in vocabulary and self-image, he makes up for in perception and awareness. Brick’s knack for body language and subtleties makes him a valuable asset in determining a person’s trustworthiness. Background Roscoe and Brick both grew up in the slums of Daerlund, the disreputable twin city to Solund. Their lives ran many parallels: they were both orphans and they were both thieves. Roscoe was nimble and subtle whereas Brick used force and intimidation. Neither broke the law out of some evil agenda. They stole to live. Daerlund was a huge city with a very pronounced gap between the upper class and everyone else. Thievery and all other sorts of criminal activity were common in Daerlund. The city was as corrupt as the nine hells. The only catch was that if one was apprehended whilst appropriating certain valuables that did not necessarily belong to him, he usually ended up without a hand or a head. One of the reasons for the corruption of Daerlund was the fact that the Nightsong Guild was stationed therein. It was to that guild that Roscoe hoped to become a member of. For a long time he went unnoticed, until one of his friends, a half-elf by the name of Nor, decided to let him tag along on one of his heists. Nor was a low-ranking member of the Nightsong Guild and Roscoe thought that it was finally his chance to get in good with the guild. The heist went off without a hitch. A week after the job, Roscoe was contacted by the guild. He met with an official and was told that he would receive offers for several “jobs” and that if he performed the tasks required they would give serious consideration to letting him in. Roscoe was 28 when he talked with the official. They kept giving him jobs and running him around until he was 50. After twelve years of being a gopher, Roscoe was getting fed up. It was then that he met a half-orc by the name of Brick. Roscoe met Brick outside of a popular tavern one night. After leaving the bar quite intoxicated, Roscoe got into an altercation with one of the patrons. Although more than two feet shorter than the human and drunk, Roscoe held his own in the fight. He held his own, that is, until the humans two friends got involved. They grabbed the halfling and took him into a nearby alley where they began to beat him. Brick was passing by when he saw the three men beating the much smaller halfling, and for reasons still unknown to him, he decided to help Roscoe. Brick ran in to the alley and grabbed one of the humans and hurled him into the wall. The other two looked up to see the seven foot tall monster standing over them. The two ran off without a second look. Brick helped Roscoe up and, when he was oriented, Roscoe asked, “Who are you?” “I’m called Brick.” Roscoe was confused. He had never seen this half-orc before. “Why did you help me?” After a long pause Brick answered with a grin, “Don’t know. Maybe cuz three on one aint fair. Maybe cuz I’se bored.” Roscoe smiled weakly and said, “You know what, I like you…” and promptly passed out. When Roscoe awoke he was in the alley and it was morning. Brick was nowhere to be seen. Roscoe wondered to himself if he would ever see Brick again. He decided that if he did, he would thank the man properly. When he arrived back at his home, he found Nor waiting for him. “We’ve got another job,” Nor said. “Yeah, well, I think I’m done with the Nightsongs. They’ve been running me around for twelve years with noth-“ “That’s changing tonight,” Nor interrupted. “This one’s a big job. They want you to go after the D’Lore family.” “The D’Lore’s huh?” Roscoe knew they were a rich family with a lot to lose. “Yep. You and one other. You got someone in mind, or you want me to go? They said that if you do well, you’re in. No ifs ands or buts.” Roscoe wasn’t sure if he could trust the guild, they were a bunch of thieves after all. Nor had not been the most loyal of friends either. Then it hit Roscoe like a brick. “I’ll do it, but I’ve got my own partner in mind.” “Fine fine,” Nor said in an indifferent tone, “Meet me at the ‘The Gryphon’ at midnight and I’ll give you the plans.” Nor flashed a crooked smile and walked out. Roscoe showed up to “The Gryphon” at the appointed time. It was the most high scale inn in Daerlund and the D’Lore mansion was just a few blocks away. Brick was waiting for him. “Thanks for coming Brick. I know this is short notice and all, but… it looks like you’re the only guy I can trust.” Brick snorted and said, “You made a good choice. Split fifty-fifty?” “You got it.” “Good.” Nor showed up a minute later. He eyed Brick suspiciously and then shrugged his shoulders. “Alright gentlemen, here’s the plan. You go in quiet and you leave the same way. We want you to fill this sack with as many valuables as you can and meet me back here at the Gryphon tomorrow night. Got it?” Roscoe nodded and took the proffered sack. They split company and the duo made their way toward the mansion. Everything was quiet when they arrived and they checked for unlocked windows on the first floor, of which they found one. Nor helped Roscoe inside and then climbed in after him. The two made their way around the mansion, and Roscoe found it odd that there was no security. He said as much to Brick. Brick shrugged and began opening one of the windows. Just then a city guard appeared at the corner of the mansion. “Theives! Theives!” He was yelling at the top of his lungs. Roscoe turned to Brick and blurted, “We’ve been set up! Those damn Nightsongs!” Brick grabbed Roscoe and started running. “Less talk, more running!” he said. He put Roscoe down and the two lead a squad of more than twenty guards on a chase all the way back to the slums where they were able to slip into familiar territory and lose the guards. After that, the two laid low for a few months. Roscoe had a large sum of money saved up and began spreading it out in the city. He bought loyalty and favors, all to be collected at a later, unspecified, date. Nearly four months passed and the two left Daerlund. Before their departure, they took one last shot at the guild. They snuck into the headquarters one night and, with the help of several bribes, were able to slip into the treasury. They absconded with over thirty thousand gold pieces in loot which they gave to several individuals who held the same opinion of the prestigious guild that they did. The two currently reside at a small ramshackle inn in Thorngoth, biding their time with small jobs. A party of adventurers would make for a nice distraction, although they would have to go back and finish things with the guild at some point. Friends and Enemies Enemies The Nightsong Guild is Roscoe and Brick’s biggest enemy. They have been trying to track down the duo and have narrowed their search to Thorngoth. The guild would like to have the two brought back to the headquarters in Daerlund, but dead is acceptable as well. Nor in particular suffered because of his botched set-up and has a personal vendetta with Roscoe. Of course, there are several other people who have been at the losing end of some of the two’s heists that wouldn’t mind seeing them disappear. Friends There are several unnamed individuals who have received money from Roscoe and Brick, but aren’t really considered friends in the traditional sense. These individuals are left anonymous to give the DM as much freedom in creating the NPCs as he would like, with a few exceptions: all of the individuals are loyal enough to the duo that they would not backstab them and their favors are only to be cashed in when concerning the destruction of the Nightsong Guild. The rest of the details would need considerable teamwork by the DM and player.
Endarrion 02-26-07, 09:33 PM	Nevermind... I didn't realize that was European time. There I go thinking all American and stuff. It's a nice feeling though, working so hard on something only to realize that it's all for not because of time zones of all things...[/sarcasm] Oh well, maybe the judges will be nice and judge it just for fun... *sigh*
Kit_the_Odd 02-26-07, 09:51 PM	I feel for you Endarrion, I've made the same mistake. And based on my experiences, at least some of the judges will probably give you some feedback once they're done with the actual judging.
Far_Traveler 02-26-07, 10:05 PM	Oooo, I can't wait for Mendalyn to get Judged! I think she's some of my best work! Not conceptually, don't think I can ever top Dogma there, but in execution she is top dog. :waits:
TheChilliGod 02-26-07, 10:28 PM	Dang. You people have actually matched the record for entries made, that was set during HC #5. And even then, we would have had a broken record if time rewound itself a hour + a half or something like that. :D Well, after catching some of the concepts posted, I'm not quite so sure anymore that I would have won with my own entry. The bar has been raised about that further since last time I skipped judging. You should all be proud of yourselves, no matter what place you came in or what award you (didn't) win. Oh well, I'll still post my entry sometime in the near future, so everyone can enjoy the antics. :clap:
Shan_TheBabau_Burke 02-26-07, 11:36 PM	The Good Paladin Devorczek and Mysterious Sister Fred History Dorne Devorczek grew up as an orphan in the Church of Pelor, because his parents were both killed in a war against a group of elves. He had a good childhood, but his heart was filled with vengeance. The clerics groomed him to take the mantle of paladin when he came of age, and on his eighteenth birthday, he did just that. He became known as the Watchdog of Pelor, known for his mercy and compassion in helping wherever he was sent. He built a solid reputation and was known far and wide. Then he was given a quest that led him into the heart of Wood-Elf territory. Her Grace Queen Lorrimiverriah and her beautiful kingdom were under attack by orcs. Though he wasn't pleased with his quest, Devorczek pursued it as he did all others, with confidence and bravery. He came across an Orcish camp, shouted his intentions, and began clearing the camp. While he was killing orcs, he came across a wounded elf. Instead of helping him, Devorczek turned his head and left the elf to die. He finished his quest, but found that Pelor was no longer responsive. After several weeks of first trying to rationalize and then gradually accepting that he did wrong, he attempted to atone. To get his paladin back on the straight and narrow, Pelor gave Devorczek a young elf to look after. The boy had been kidnapped and sold into slavery at a very young age. Devorczek was to rescue the boy and return him to his family. Devorczek found the boy easily enough and learned that, after so long, there was little left of the young elf's mind. He wasn't crazy, but he was certainly tipping that way. After realizing that the lad had no knowledge of the workings of the world, Devorczek began to teach him so that someday he could perhaps learn to help himself. After several years of careful training, much patience and a lot of soul searching, Devorczek managed to get the child trained with a bow so that he could protect himself, he taught him to read and write and count money, and taught him the finer points of social interaction. This gave the elf's personality a chance to shine through. The youngster was found to be an amalgam of strange habits and quirky mannerisms. When he is not in his own room, safe from the outside world, he wears a towel over his head. Everything he knows he learned under the towel, he trained for swordsmanship under the towel, he performed all his social interactions from under the towel, he learned to navigate the town with the towel on his head. All that he is was conceived under the raggy white towel. Whether he can actually see out of it or if he's just plain lucky is anyone's guess. Devorczek gave the boy a chance to pick his own name, and the boy was adamant about his pick. Thus Sister Fred was born. The two are now in search of Sister Fred's family. In spite of himself, Devorczek has grown fond of they silly young elf, and the two are becoming a formidable duo. Dorne Devorczek- Looks and Personality "The sun glares blindingly off the man striding across the square into the church. He wears a full plate that has been shined so you can see the reflections of the people he passes. His helmet tucked under his arm, he glances around and struts through the open doors." Devorczek is medium height, around 5'11" but he's as imposing outside of his armor as he is in it, tipping the scales at a chiseled 175lbs. He has medium length black hair and blue eyes which the less righteous have trouble meeting. He has sideburns that end just under his ears, though he has neither a mustache nor a beard. His voice is quiet and a little smug and he always speaks with a sneer. He is very aware of his personal appearance and spends time each day to look just right. His armor is polished to a mirror finish as is his longsword. His cloak looks brand new though he has had it for years and a speck of mud wouldn't dare touch his boots. He is stern and possesses no sense of humor. He is ever the gentleman and full of good grace. His manners are impeccable and his motives unimpeachable. He is widely known and well respected. It is said he has a place at every king's table if he ever so wishes. His eye for the ladies extends only as far as their troubles though he is normally far less gruff with them than he is with other males. He tolerates nonsense from none but Sister Fred, and any attempted foolery or wiliness is enough to earn his disrespect if not his enmity. His favorite thing to say to those who have the misfortune of coming against him is: "Yeah, that's the thing isn't it? If I'm here that means even the gods hate you." He is a trusted man of Pelor because he is everything a holy man should be. Sister Fred- Looks and Personality "Behind the well-groomed paladin saunters a tall figure with a hood?... no a towel on it's head. The figure clutches a greatsword in both hands and waves it around, mumbling in a high,squeaky voice the whole time. He shuffles into the church behind the paladin, greatsword still drawn." Sister Fred is very tall for a human, let alone an elf. He is not purely elven, his great-grandfather on his mother's side was a human of notable stature. His grandparents and parents are both full blooded elves and though some of the height stuck around, the elven frailness prevailed. As a result, Sister Fred stands a couple of inches over six feet and weighs just under 140lbs. His ears stick almost straight out from his head and his eyes are the tawny color of weak tea. Not that too many people have ever seen Sister Fred's eyes. He keeps a towel over his head for reasons known to him and only him. Even Devorczek has only suspicions of the reasoning behind the oddly hung towel. Sister Fred wears a chain shirt and black canvas trousers along with heavy leather boots. He wears black leather, spiked bracers that serve no purpose other than decoration, and of course, Sister Fred wears a towel on his head. It is a plain, shabby, white 2' by 3' towel normally used for drying after a bath. Along with the bow he was taught to use, he developed an affinity for using a blunt-tipped greatsword he named Gaston. "Gaston", he explains in his own voice, "is short for Rumnidoveni which is Elven for, well, I don't actually know what it's Elven for as I don't speak that language." Sister Fred displays very little personality other than a silly sense of humor. He always introduces himself in a falsetto, saying "Hi, I'm Sister Fred" and little else. He is rarely serious, and if something strikes his funny bone he never laughs, but puts a finger up to his toweled lips and says "I am smiling." in his goofy falsetto. The Watchdog and the Sister The two have developed a rhythm in combat that gets closer to perfection every battle. Sister Fred is quick and surprisingly sneaky. He quickly mastered flanking maneuvers and he uses his bull rush to push opponents into the path of Devorczek and Helvar, Devorczek's warhorse. Sister Fred actually does very little direct damage, preferring to leave the "real violence" to the paladin. Devorczek relies more and more on Sister Fred as the days go by, and he now swings his sword with confidence knowing that somehow, there will always be an opponent to take down. He usually holds his initiative until Sister Fred has acted, so that he can take advantage of whatever trick the elf has decided to pull. Dorne Devorczek- Paladin of Pelor Human Paladin Lvl 12 Alignment L/G Speed 20'/rd. HP 77 Init. +0 AC 23 Natural +10 Armor +8 (+Heavy Fortification) Dexterity +0 Shield +2 Ring +3 Armor Check Penalty -8 Str 20/ +5 Dex 12/ +1 Con 11/ +0 Int 10/ +0 Wis 14/ +2 Cha 14/ +2 Saves Total= Base/ Modifier/ Divine Grace Fortitude +11= +8/ +1/ +2 Reflex +6= +4/ +0/ +2 Will +8= +4/ +2/ +2 Base Attack +12/+7/+2 Grapple 17+ 12+ 5 Attacks Longsword(+3) +20/ +15/+10 1d8+8 19-20x2 Slashing/Piercing Mighty Composite Longbow (+5) +13/ +8/ +3 1d8+3 x3 Piercing Skills <Total> [Ranks] (Modifier) Miscellaneous Handle Animal <+17> [15] (+2) Ride <+15> [15] (+0) Sense Motive <+17> [15] (+2) Feats Endurance Diehard Mounted Combat Ride By Attack Spirited Charge Trample Class Features Aura of Good Detect Evil Smite Evil 3/Day Divine Grace Lay on Hands Divine Health Turn Undead Special Mount Remove Disease 3/Week Helvar is Devorczek's Special Mount. He is a simple warhorse as described on pp. 45 of the PHB Spells Per Day 1st- 1 2nd- 1 3rd- 1 Equipment Full Plate Heavy Steel Shield Longsword Mighty Composite Longbow Arrows x20 Holy Symbol (Silver) Belt of Giant Strength +4 Backpack Bedroll Waterskin Total Carried Weight: 84 lbs Total Money Carried: 5,382g; 9s Full Plate 26,650g (Cost of Armor; Heavy Fortification) Masterwork Heavy Steel Shield 170g Longsword 25,315g (Cost of Sword;+3 Bonus) Arrows 1g Mighty Composite Longbow +5,600g Holy Symbol 25g Belt of Giant Strength +4 16,000g Backpack 2g Bedroll 1s Waterskin 1g Tithe 8,800g Starting Equipment:Scale Mail 50g; Light Wooden Shield 3g (He donated this to the church, so no selling price is included) Sister Fred Elven Fighter Lvl 4 Alignment C/G Speed 30'/rd. Lowlight Vision HP 25 Init. +3 AC 17 Natural 10 Armor +4 Dexterity +3 Armor Check Penalty -0 Str 18/+4 Dex 16/+3 Con 11/+0 Int 10/+0 Wis 8/-1 Cha 8/-1 Saves Total= Base/ Modifier/ Cloak Fortitude +5= +4/ +0/ +1 Reflex +5= +1/ +3/ +1 Will +1= +1/ -1/ +1 (+2 VS Enchantment- Elven heritage) Base Attack +4 Grapple +8 Attacks Greatsword +8 2d6+4 19-20x2 Slashing Longbow +7 1d8 x3 Piercing Skills <Total> [Ranks] (Modifier) {Racial Bonus} Climb <+9> [7] (+2) Jump <+9> [7] (+2) Listen <+1> (-1) {+2} Search <+1> (-1) {+2} Spot <+1> (-1) {+2} Feats Combat Expertise Improved Trip Power Attack Improved Bull Rush Blind-fight Equipment Mythril Chain Longbow Greatsword Cloak of Resistance +1 Potion of Cure Serious Wounds x1 Potion of Cure Moderate Wounds x3 Backpack Bedroll Waterskin Total Carried Weight: 32lbs Total Money Carried 619g; 9s Mythril Chain 1,000g Longbow 15g Greatsword 50g Cloak of Resistance +1 1,000g Potion of Cure Serious Wounds 750g Potion of Cure Moderate Wounds 300g each Backpack 2g Bedroll 1s Waterskin 1g Starting Equipment: Leather Armor 10g sold for 5g
JasonOrlandoHawk 02-27-07, 12:18 AM	Wow! 12 official entries, and several more solid, but late, contestants! I am very happy to have such a solid turn out, and even happier that I'm not the one judging it!! :D Anyways, now it's time for my horrible request: If at all possible, could the judges please post scores by Thursday night? I'm leaving for a mission trip Friday morning, and I won't be back for a week and a half. I'd hate to have to wait that long to see the results. (Please note, having been a judge for a while now, I am fully aware of the fact that there is likely no way the judges, even if they discarded all scraps of their normal lives, could hope to hit such a time line. Don't feel rushed on my account. I'm just mourning the fact that it will be almost 2 weeks before I get to see the results.) Like Chilli said, the quality of the entries has definately gone up this time around. Excellent work all around! I will try and post some non-official comments (w/ no judges allowed) in the next few days, if I can. However, I have a lot to do, and little time to do it, so if I can't post comments on the more recent submissions, my apologies. I'm very anxious to see how things turn out. With my experience as a judge, I have my guesses for who will take the top medals, and to be quite honest, I doubt I will be among the medal winners. The creativity and talent shown in this competition makes me glad I won when the HC contests were much less popular!
Zherog 02-27-07, 10:53 AM	I've updated the list to include links to the two late entries. I'll definitely give some comments on your entries - you took the effort to make the character, so the least I can do is offer some feedback. Jason - I really would love to help you out. But I really don't see a way to be through judging all 12 entires by Thursday evening. That said, my goal is always to finish as soon as possible. So you never know - I just don't think it'll happen.
Mercurius 02-27-07, 11:14 PM	To Jason: No. Sorry, but I have to work all day and night tomorrow, amounting to a net 12 hours "working," not including transit time. I won't be anywhere near a computer that I could peruse all the characters on. In fact, I can't say as I'll get a chance before Saturday to even look. That's the downside of having to work 50+ hours a week just to make ends meet. On the plus side, I'll do my best. Maybe I'll print some of the entries up to take with me for during breaks...
JasonOrlandoHawk 02-28-07, 12:29 AM	Note to all judges: I did, specifically, note that I honestly didn't expect you to be done within that time frame. It was my way of mourning the amount of time I will be forced to wait before I know how I scored. I'm fairly certain that scores weren't posted that quickly in HC#2, when there were less than half as many entries. It's just that I didn't feel right asking you all to postpone posting the scores until I got back! ;) Mercurius, I don't know about how the other judges accomplish the feat, but I usually require about 10 solid hours and 5 cans of Dr. Pepper for me to accomplish most scoring that I've done. And yes, it is not easy fitting that into a hectic schedule (for me, the joys of having two jobs!). I do not envy you the task of grading the submissions present for this competition.
Shan_TheBabau_Burke 02-28-07, 04:51 PM	Don't worry too much about scoring mine in a timely fashion, or at all even. I had them made up and thought of entering, but was sure they wouldn't stand with the entries that were already here. I was simply looking for some feedback and suggestions and thought this might be the best place to get it.
Zherog 02-28-07, 04:59 PM	Yeah, I won't score the DQ'ed entries, and I probably won't go through them as well as I will the other entries. But I'll definitely look and give you comments. Like I said, you took the time to make the character; the least I can do is give you some time in offering feedback and suggestions. I'm looking to get started tomorrow. I'm sick today, and while normally that wouldn't stop me, I feel light-headed and not quite "all there." I didn't think it'd be fair to judge entries while I feel like :censored:. So hopefully I can get a couple knocked out tomorrow and Friday, and the rest over the weekend. It takes me somewhere between 1 and 2 hours per entry typically.
jennibert 02-28-07, 08:57 PM	First off....12 entries? Wow. 12 entries at ECL 12 means we have a gross of levels or equivalents....ignoring sidekicks, of course ;) That said....I'm going now to commence of the judging! We'll see how far I actually get....Oh, and Jason, sorry. Wish I could help you out, but unfortunately my job is not conducive to judging while there (as I would imagine yours is not either....), and I spend too much time working :pbbbtt: . Sorry you'll have to wait... Anyways, what I've looked at so far is very interesting (only read some backgrounds--no digging out of the books yet!), so should be a fun judging experience. Now to throw the cat out of my lap so that I can replace him with books.....
Far_Traveler 03-03-07, 09:26 PM	When is the judging over!!!! I know it takes a while, but I'm impatient. Can some of the judges give us a status report or something?
FRRC 03-04-07, 07:32 AM	Kirk: Mr Sulu, status report! Sulu: There's Klingons on the Starboard bow, Captain.
Kit_the_Odd 03-04-07, 09:24 AM	"There's Klingons off the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow, There's Klingons off the starboard bow, Scrape them off Jim!" -Startrekkin'
Zherog 03-04-07, 11:41 AM	:rofl: I love that song... I'm expecting to wrap up on Wednesday. I usually strive for getting them done one week after the contest closes. However, this past week everybody in my house has gone through a nasty stomach bug. First the kids, then me, then my wife. It cut down significantly on my available time.
Mercurius 03-04-07, 05:34 PM	I'll say that I've been busier than usual in the evenings with my second job, so I haven't had much time getting to the judging. I'll be slower than I'd like in finalizing this, and I apologize for the delay everyone. I'll work as hard as I can to get this all done in a timely fashion, but I may take a bit longer than the rest.
Orchomenos 03-05-07, 03:26 PM	I'll say that I've been busier than usual in the evenings with my second job, so I haven't had much time getting to the judging. I'll be slower than I'd like in finalizing this, and I apologize for the delay everyone. I'll work as hard as I can to get this all done in a timely fashion, but I may take a bit longer than the rest. Not a trouble, but keep us aware! :cool:
Haruspex 03-07-07, 09:03 PM	Will the thread disappear if no one bumps it? Just to be sure.:D Good luck with the judging!
Far_Traveler 03-09-07, 09:57 AM	Judge, Judge, Judge, Judge the numerous entires...
Zherog 03-09-07, 01:00 PM	I expect to be done by Sunday, but hope to be done by tomorrow. I apologize for taking so long. First, we had the stomach bug from hell run through my house. Then I came into work on Monday to be greeted by a crisis that could've resulted in my company facing enormous* daily fines. I'm now working on a not-quite-a-crisis issue. I've definitely taken too long in judging this one. * in this case, "enormous" equals roughly $250,000 per day, if anybody was curious...
Orchomenos 03-09-07, 04:27 PM	I expect to be done by Sunday, but hope to be done by tomorrow. I apologize for taking so long. First, we had the stomach bug from hell run through my house. Then I came into work on Monday to be greeted by a crisis that could've resulted in my company facing enormous* daily fines. I'm now working on a not-quite-a-crisis issue. I've definitely taken too long in judging this one. * in this case, "enormous" equals roughly $250,000 per day, if anybody was curious... Blah-blah-blah... :P Just kidding. I took care of similar contests in the past, I understand you 100%. You have some spare time, you enter a contest on a fantasy board, and 3 weeks later, when it's judging time, you're in a rush at job... :raincloud :banghead: If only D&D could be a 50K$/year job... :cloud9:
Mercurius 03-09-07, 09:43 PM	I'll admit right now, I've been swamped with work and haven't had the free time to really do much judging. I've gotten 3 characters down so far (doesn't help that this is a level range I'm less used to, I effectively have two characters per entry to do it's my first time judging). :ton: I have decided to forgo my first foray into the local Living Greyhawk game in the area tomorrow to spend much of my day working on entries (until I have to go to work at my second job in the evening). With my fiancee going home this weekend and me without any friends in the area, I'll probably get more work done Sunday night, as well. However, I don't expect to be done until at least sometime next week. Again, my apologies. :embarrass :hides:
Far_Traveler 03-10-07, 01:36 PM	it's alright, s'all good.
TheChilliGod 03-10-07, 01:43 PM	Wow. It's amazing how patient you can be when you don't have an entry in there needs judging. I've almost forgotten that you're even still at work! :D
JasonOrlandoHawk 03-12-07, 01:19 PM	It's just that I didn't feel right asking you all to postpone posting the scores until I got back! ;) I wasn't being serious, guys! :D Well, I'm back! Hope to see the results soon, if possible.
Far_Traveler 03-13-07, 10:27 PM	Okay, right about now even I will admit to being a little impatient with the scoring, what's up?
wrecan 03-14-07, 09:53 AM	They are trying to develop a new number sufficiently high enough to appropriately describe my score. :)
Zherog 03-14-07, 11:32 AM	They are trying to develop a new number sufficiently high enough to appropriately describe my score. :) Huh? The number "zero" already exists. :P :P I think I'm going to be done today. My job has, once again, sapped my free time. We've taken way too long to judge this contest, and for that I apologize. I've requested the other judges get me their scores by this weekend at the absolute latest. I will be posting scores no later than Sunday evening, and hopefully before that.
JasonOrlandoHawk 03-14-07, 11:39 AM	Huh? The number "zero" already exists. :P :P Wow, wrecan, we tied! :cool:
wrecan 03-14-07, 03:49 PM	:pbbbtt:
jennibert 03-14-07, 09:42 PM	It seems I seriously overestimated the amount of time I'd have for scoring, a fact for which I sincerely apologize. I think I'll probably be out of judging while I get my wedding planned (Sept 22, yay!), as that's a large portion of what's killed my time. Sorry everyone! I'm working I promise!
Zherog 03-16-07, 12:55 PM	My scores (and comments) are completed. I want to do a quick proofread before I post them, though. Expect to see them within an hour. I've requested jenni and Mercurius get me their scores by Sunday evening at the latest. Sunday night, I'll post totals regardless of what scores I have. I will not identify any judges who failed to get me their scores in time. I know all of us feel bad about taking so long to get done this judging, and I see no need to publicly point out if somebody didn't get done. So, summary: expect my comments later today, and score no later than Sunday night (EDT).
Zherog 03-16-07, 02:05 PM	Without any further adieu, comments from Z. I’ll start off with a quick generic one. I absolutely love some of the names people come up with for their characters (in this contest and otherwise). I’ve always found names for characters interesting. I have one player who always gives his characters real world names (his current character is William, and William’s cohort is Samuel). My wife’s character’s names almost always end in the letter ‘a.’ Anyway, just a quick generic comment; there were definitely some fun names in this one, too. Minor typos and spelling errors won’t hurt your score. Let’s face it, we’ve all sat and proofread something a gajillion times, only to have a typo get through anyway. We’ve all been there. Now, if your typos/spelling/grammar are extreme, then yeah – you can expect that you probably lost some clarity points. A few generic points: There’re a few key things I look for in a background (both here and from my players): Description I want to know what your character looks like, how she dresses, and so on. Paint a mental picture for me. Family Everybody has a family. Tell me something about yours. And if you tell me they’re all dead, you’ll find you’re wrong. :) Allies Everybody has ‘em, so tell me about yours. Do you have a mentor who taught you your cool abilities? A childhood friend growing up? Whatever – give me somebody who likes you, the more specific the better. Adversaries Everybody has these, too. Whether it’s the neighborhood bully, the dude you stole the prom queen from, or whatever. More specific is better. I like names. Background matches abilities I swear, I once got a background from a player in a 1st level game that basically went on and on about all this stuff she did, to conclude with the sentence, “And that’s the story of how my character single-handedly slew the great wyrm red dragon.” :twitch: I want a background that matches your ability level; if you’re first level, no red dragon slayage. If you’re 12th level, don’t say, “He’s done some stuff here and there.” I don’t need details of every deed, but touch on some of the major points – especially in this contest, where you’re 12th level. One special note here. If you took a prestige class with one of those abilities such as “must make friendly contact with an outsider” or whatever, your background better hit upon that. Goals It’s not exactly part of your background, but it’s something I want to know about. In fact, in my game that’s been going for about 3 years now, I regularly (every 6-9 months) ask my players to reassess their character’s life goals. What’s the same? What’s changed? If I know what your character wants in life, I can tailor adventures to you. Personality This one is last intentionally. I don’t necessarily expect it with every character. Sometimes, you just don’t quite know for sure. It’s nice to have it there as a guide, but I don’t make a fuss if somebody doesn’t share it. You’ll see me talk about those elements a lot when I talk about your backgrounds. Before I break into individual comments, this looks like a good place to provide a bit of info about what I place into each category. Thematic Creativity: I generally have a “most likely” scenario in my mind on how people will fill a category. For example, in the Divine Servant contest, I expected clerics and paladins. If your character is my “most likely” you have an uphill battle to convince me your entry was creative. This contest, though, is a little different. I don’t really have a Most Likely theme. I can think of a whole bunch of ways to fulfill the criteria, and none of them – in my mind – are more clichéd than the others. What I want to see: I want to see a developed relationship between you and your sidekick. If you have an animal companion, and all you do is give me a stat block you’re not going to do well here. If you have a familiar, and your story integrates it and makes it special, you’ll do well here. The other thing that goes into this bucket for me is the playability of your character. If I don’t think your character can play nicely in a group, this is where that will be reflected in your scores. Background: Was it fun to read? Does it explain your character? Do you hit the things I mention above (family, foes, allies, goals)? Is it reasonable? These sorts of things affect this score. Rules Use: I rebuild each character. If I can’t make my numbers match your numbers, it’ll show up here. Small things are just that – small. If you misadded your skill points for one skill, it’s a small typo. If you miscalculated your total number of skill points, that’s a bigger deal. Clarity: When I looked at your character sheet, could I find things? If you used non-core material, did you point me in the right direction so I could look it up? Was your character sheet formatted nice and neat? Spelling and grammar count – but only to a point. Everybody makes typos. I don’t care if you have a few (Jason’s the teacher, not me. ;) ). If, however, your spelling or grammar were so bad that it made it difficult to read, you lost points here. My comments on your character are broken out into three sections: Math Stuff, Background Stuff, and Other Stuff. Math Stuff: Anything having to do with the stats of your character go here. It includes more than math – for example, if you don’t have the right number of languages, it’ll be noted here. Some of the other stuff I might note here could be considered “min/max” advice. Background Stuff: Anything having to do with the flavor of your character will be found here. Other Stuff: This doesn’t appear on every character, and is a “catch all” category for everything else. If I have a comment about a similar character in one of my games, for example, it’ll be here. If I think you have an especially cool name for your character, it’s here. And so on. With all that out of the way, let’s move on to individual comments, eh? Math Stuff Female Human Rog 4/Sor 5/Arcane Trickster 3 As a 5th level sorcerer, you don’t meet the pre-reqs for Arcane Trickster. The class requires 3rd level arcane spells, and 5th level sorcerer only has access to 2nd level spells (she gains access to 3rd at 6th level). In addition, ideally, you only need 3 levels of rogue to meet the requirements (though it can make the skill acquisition needed a bit tricky). Ref +15 (+1 Sor +4 Rog +4 Trk +3 Dex +3 resistance), Evasion, Trap Sense +1 Will +12 (+4 Sor +1 Rog +4 Trk +3 resistance) These are both incorrect. 5th level sorcerer has base saves of 1/1/4; 4th level of rogue has base saves of 1/4/1; 3rd level arcane trickster has base saves of 1/3/3. Add those up for a total base save of 3/8/8. After ability modifiers, your totals go to 4/11/8. Finally, add your +3 resistance bonus and you get +7/+14/+11. The problem lies in your arcane trickster value – you have each of them as +4 when they should be +3. Feats Bonded Familiar*, Extend Spell, Telling Blow**, Stealthy, Combat Casting, Alertness (familiar) You’re missing a feat. You’re a 12th level human, so you should have 6 feats (human, 1st, 3rd, 6th, 9th, 12th). And your Alertness is a freebie, so it doesn’t count. Combat Casting Blech. This feat is such a trap. It’s a nice bonus for casting defensively at early levels, but by level 5 or 6 it should be relatively easy to cast defensively without it. Even more important, though, the +4 from Combat Casting only applies when casting defensively. You could instead take Skill Focus (Concentration). And while that bonus is only +3, it applies to every Concentration check you make. And those do scale with level – for example, you’re likely to have harder checks for continuing damage at higher levels. Skills: >>Snippy McSnip Was Here!<< A few things here. First (and probably most important), you seem to have a lot of skill points unspent – all of them from your arcane trickster levels. That class gives 4+Int per level, plus you get a bonus point from being a human. So you have 6 skill points per AT level (18 total). You spent 3 on Bluff, 3 on Gather Info, and 3 on Sleight of Hand (9 total). So you have 9 more skill points to spend on those three levels. Second (and not overly important), you have Alertness from your familiar, but you don’t have Spot or Listen on your stat block. Third (and somewhere in the middle on the importance meter), you forgot a bunch of bonuses to skills. Your ranks in Bluff grant a +2 bonus to Diplomacy, Intimidate, and Sleight of Hand (and some Disguise checks). Your ranks in Knowledge (arcana) grant a +2 bonus on Spellcraft checks. You also have some bonuses to Use Magic Device, but since you have no ranks, those don’t matter. In addition to the synergy bonuses, you have masterwork thieves’ tools. These grant a +2 circumstance bonus on Disable Device (a skill you have) and Open Lock (a skill you don’t). DC 13 + spell level I’d really like to see that save DC come up a bit higher. A large chunk of you spells require saving throws, but for 12th level this is a really low DC – even for your highest level spells. Just for an example: Take your worst save (Fortitude). At +7, you would need to roll a 10 or better to save against your best spell – you’d be making your save 55% of the time, and that’s the target’s worse save against your best spell. Equipment When I add up your stuff, I get a total of 87995. As always, under is always better than over. Also, I calculate your total weight carried as 55.5 pounds, which is a medium load (and close to a heavy load, actually). This means you should be taking a -3 penalty to a bunch of skills, and it also means your speed should be reduced to 20 ft. Silver Mirror (for scrying) (1000 gp) Yay for remembering to pay for an expensive focus! I’ve seen so many characters forget about ‘em for some reason. Also: Yay for remembering to pay for your familiar! Another cost I’ve seen people forget to include. Elixir of Love (150 gp) Nice touch for a Valentine’s Day themed contest. :) Tiny Animal He’s actually a magical beast. Hit Dice 11d8 (24 hp) He effectively has your hit dice (so it should be 12, not 11). Attack Claws +8 melee (1d2-5) You forgot to include the size bonus to attacks here; it should be +10. Feats Alertness, Weapon Finesse Nit pick: Weapon Finesse is a bonus feat, and so it should have the superscript ‘B’ after it. Background Stuff Your background is OK; I’d really like to see a bit more, though. I don’t need a novel, but she’s 12th level. Give me some sense of the adventures she’s had, other than working as a petty thief. I think Loki is tied to Kaylee nicely, making him indispensable to her. He’s integrated well into her story, and he’s important to Kaylee. Nice job there. Outside of adventure, she does fortune-telling on the side I’m not a fan of wasting skill points – but why isn’t this accounted for in your stats? A rank (or two at the most) in Profession (fortune teller) brings this aspect of her character to life on the character sheet. The scent of incense washes into your nostrels as you enter the tent. What tent? She doesn’t own one. ;) As for your allies and enemies... Come on, she’s 12th level, and she’s a thief! Isn’t there somebody she robbed who seeks revenge? And she’s only made one friend, too? Other Stuff Arcane Trickster is one of my favorite classes, from a flavor point of view. I think it’s a little weak mechanically, though. A particular pet peeve of mine: it requires 7 ranks in Decipher Script, but none of the class’s abilities use the skill. Blech. Truestrike (+2 seeking light crossbow) (18,335 gp) Dazzler (+1 spell storing rapier [hold person stored]) (8,320 gp) I like when players name their special equipment. I think it adds a level of flavor to the game. Math Stuff AC 20 (+2 dex, +2 size, +3 nat armor, +2 deflection, +1 insight) Touch 17, Flatfooted 20 (Uncanny Dodge) ... Ref +8 (+5 Rogue, +1 Psion, + 2 Dex) (Evasion) You also have trap sense, which effects both of these. Melee: Bite att +9/+4, dam 1d3-1, crit 20(x2) and Claws, att +7/+2, dam 1d2-1, crit 20 (x2) You have several problems here. First, a cat’s primary attack is its claws, not its bite. Also, you do not gain extra attacks with natural weapons as your BAB increases. Finally, you forgot your +2 size bonus. Your line should look like: Melee: 2 claws +11 (+6 BAB, +2 Dex, +1 enhancement, +2 size), 1d2-1 and bite +9 (+6 BAB, –2 Multiattack, +2 Dex, +1 enhancement, +2 size), 1d3-1. Trap sense +1 Note that your trap sense should be +2, not +1. Feats: ... Multiattack So here’s me learning something new. Multiattack has the following pre-reqs: Prerequisite: Three or more natural attacks. For whatever reason, I always thought that meant three types of natural attack – and the cat has two (claw and bite). So I set off to see who was right. And it took me a while, but I finally was able to demonstrate to myself (by looking at the babau demon) that you were indeed correct. :tiphat: Skill Ranks (32 class pts + 4 Int): Appraise 4, Bluff 4, Climb 4, Diplomacy 4, Hide 4, Intimidate 4, Spot 4, Search 4 Skill ranks bought (8 class pts +1 Int) (Total): Appraise 1 (5), Bluff 1 (5), Climb 1 (5), Gather Information 1 (1), Hide 1 (5), Intimidate 1 (5), Spot 1 (5), Search 1 (5) You appear to be five skill ranks short, and this looks like the culprit. At first level, you spent 32 rather than 36; and at second level you spent 8 rather than 9. Diplomacy +6 (-1 Cha, 7 ranks) This should be +10. You get a +4 from synergies with Bluff and Sense Motive. Gather Information +5 (-1 Cha, 6 ranks) I have a discrepancy here, too, based on your chart at the end. Here’s the levels you listed as having ranks in GI: Level 2: 1 rank Level 3: 1 rank Level 6: 1 rank* Level 11: 1 rank You list your total at level 6 as 5 ranks, rather than 3. Now, your level breakdown has skills missing (as indicated above), but those missing skills were at first and second level, where you had your total for GI correct. So I’m not quite sure how to reconcile the difference. Hide +11 (+15 in long grass or heavy undergrowth) (+2 Dex, 5 ranks, +4 racial (+8 racial in grass etc)) In addition to the +4 racial bonus, you receive a +8 size bonus for being Tiny. Intimidate +4 (-1 Cha, 5 ranks) It doesn’t affect your stats, but it’s worth noting: Don’t forget this (sucky) rule about the Intimidate skill: Special: You gain a +4 bonus on your Intimidate check for every size category that you are larger than your target. Conversely, you take a –4 penalty on your Intimidate check for every size category that you are smaller than your target. Assuming you’ll be Intimidating Medium creatures (humans, elves, etc), that’d be a -8 penalty you would need to include at the time of rolling the die. Jump +5 (+2 Dex, 3 ranks) Cats receive a +8 racial bonus on Jump. Bracers of Mighty Claws +1 (9000gp) (as Amulet of mighty fists - x 1.5 for new slot) I’m OK with reslotting this (especially since you paid the required premium to do so), however it doesn’t stack with: 2x magic fang potion (100gp) Because both items provide an enhancement bonus. Otherwise your equipment checked out OK. Though I am curious how a cat (lacking opposable thumbs) is planning on using tanglefoot bags and flasks of alchemist’s fire. I can’t seem to find your psion discipline anywhere on your character sheet. Based on your skills (Gather Info and Sense Motive as class skills), you’re a telepath. But that should’ve been noted somewhere, rather than relying upon me to figure it out. Level 8 - Rogue 3/ Psion 5 It’s worth noting that for this level (and the next) you incurred an XP penalty. The point is academic in this contest, but it’s something to note for other scenarios. For example, I’ve seen DMs who will start a game by saying, “You have X amount of XP” where X is the amount you need for, say, 12th level. Under that scenario, you would need to account for the penalty, and you’d only be an 11th level character. It’s worth noting, of course, for going forward. Background Stuff Interesting concept. You’ve struck upon one of my... quirks, I guess, because “pet peeve” isn’t the right phrase. Namely, I don’t often like the “usually the spell does X, but this one time it did Y instead” sort of thing. And you have that going on. Now, that said, were I the DM who received this background, I’d likely allow it – but only after we had a chat about it. I’d want to discuss a few things. I’d want to make sure you agree it’s a once-in-a-lifetime sort of event – that is, don’t expect it to ever happen again. Second, I’d want your input on potential causes; finally, I’d want to know why Zeek didn’t just arrange for a dispel magic rather than going through the troubles he did. A thrall definitely qualifies for the contest’s theme. I would’ve liked to see a bit more info about Carrun. Basically, he just showed up one day. In every other HC so far, that would’ve been fine. But in this contest in particular, I was looking for “sidekicks” that were well-integrated into the character’s backstory. Finally, your background is fun (even if it makes me twitch a bit), but it’s really short. We don’t know much of anything about Zeek – how’d he gain all those levels after turning into a cat? How’d he ever learn to speak? How’d he learn to unlock the power of his mind? He’s done something to gain 10 levels as a cat, so tell me a bit. Hit the highlights. Give me some stories to hook on and develop out more. Other Stuff Ugh. Psionics... I wish I could get a better feel for the system, so I wouldn’t dread entries that include it. Math Stuff BAB/Grap: +12/+15 Grapple should be +17 (+12 BAB, +5 Str) Remove Disease 2/week Time for another episode of “Z rants about rules he doesn’t like.” Today’s special guest is the paladin’s remove disease ability. What the heck is the deal with limiting to number of uses per week? Did WotC seriously think it would be too powerful if it was usable daily instead? :uh-huh: I’ve been playing for a long, long time and I don’t think I’ve ever encountered a situation where doubling the number of uses and making it per day instead of per week would be broken. What a rotten, miserable class feature... *ahem* Whitewind, Heavy Warhorse (Large Magical Beast) ... Str: 18/+4 His Strength should be 21. The “normal” heavy warhorse has a Strength of 18, and a level 12 paladin’s mount gains a +3 bonus to that score. SV: Fort: +18 (+4 vs. Non-Lethal), Ref: +10, Will: +7 I was unable to back into your Fort or Ref save here. He gets to share your base saves, and in each case your base save is better, so we have +10/+4/+6 for the base saves. Now add in Whitewind’s modifiers (Con = +4, Dex = +1, Wis = +1), and we get +14/+5/+7. Finally, we need to add Lightning Reflexes, so we get final totals of +14/+7/+7. I’m not able to figure out where the difference lies. +1 Focused1 Mithral Heavy Shield You have a footnote, but it’s not defined anywhere. I’m gonna guess you were citing the source. Grand Home 5,000gp (6-room building w/ simple attached stables, low stone fence around property, p.101 DMG) Wow! You get two Z rants in one character. This is another aspect of the system that bugs me. Not just the house, either – stuff like the bottles of fine wine, and so on. Basically, the idea is that a character of a given level should have a certain net worth. And from that net worth the character needs to purchase two things: stuff that keeps him alive (armor, weapons, stat boosters, etc) and “cool” things (a house, wine, fancy meals, etc). But the more you spend on the latter, the less you have to spend on the former – which has the very real possibility of leading directly to your death. I’d love to see a better system for determining gear and such for a player that divorced the stuff you have from the “cool” stuff... Potion: Cure Moderate Wounds x2 600gp Potion: Enlarge Person 250gp Potion: Remove Paralysis x2 600gp You know, I can’t think of any good reason why these items are sitting at home in a chest. They don’t do you any good there (if you come across somebody who has been paralyzed by a ghoul, are you going to rush home to get the potion?), and there’s no reason you couldn’t just be carrying them – it’s not like you have a load issue or anything. So this doesn’t really make sense to me. For your equipment as a whole, I compute your total value to be 86,920. I checked it twice and got the same number. Now, as always, I think being under is significantly better than being over. Just take the extra cash and buy some healing potions or wands, and be done with it. Background Stuff :weep: I’m all verklempt. Talk amongst yourselves. A very touching background. You did a good job of making Araithor an actual person in my mind. The other thing you did very well through your series of letters was show me how you’ve advanced to level 12. There were lots of little mentions of things like trolls and orcs and ogres and wolves and on and on. I liked, too, that as you listed various encounters they started off simple (grey orcs, dire wolves) and progressed up. There’s definitely stuff for a DM to work with – holy cow! In fact, your “cliff hanger” ending might just be too good, in a way. It begs for immediate resolution. One fear would be your character becoming the focus of the campaign, as you pushed to rescue your woman. Definitely good stuff to work with, though. Overall, this is an extremely solid entry! Math Stuff Cleric 12 This is much more of a nit pick than an actual problem. I much prefer to see “Cleric of Pelor 12” here. That way, I don’t have to rely on reading your background to know right away what sort of ethos you should be espousing. Base Attack/Grapple: +9/+9 Small creatures take a –4 penalty to grapple checks; your total should be +5. Attack: +2 merciful morningstar +11 melee (1d6+2+1d6) Full Attack: +2 merciful morningstar +11/+6 melee (1d6+2+1d6) Along with your +1 size bonus to AC, you also receive a +1 size bonus to attacks. This should be +12/+7. Turn Undead ... greater turning 1/day I like to see the details of these on the character sheet. Otherwise, when it comes time to turn those nasty undead during the game session, you have to dive for the books to look up the details. In my opinion, the less time with an open book the better. Saves: Fort +15, Ref +9, Will +17 It’d be good to mention your +2 racial bonus vs illusions here on this line. Skill Modifiers: Knowledge (religion) +15, Heal +24 I find there’s a bunch of skills that are worth listing, even if you don’t have ranks: Hide, Listen, Move Silently, Search, and Spot are all good ones to always list. Especially for you, because you have a bunch of things working (racial bonuses to Hide and Listen, armor check penalties to Hide and Move Silently). Spells Normally Prepared: Domains are Healing and Sun. (6/7/6/6/5/4/3) Be careful how you list those. It’s important to remember there’s domain slots there. What you have is technically correct, but often it’s better to list it like the PHB does (6/6+1/5+1/5+1/4+1/3+1/2+1). cure light wounds* ... cure moderate wounds* ... cure serious wounds* ... cure critical wounds* ... mass cure light wounds* Blech. I know it fits your theme, but you can already spontaneously cast any of these from your regular spell slots. In every case, you’re better off prepping the spell from the Sun domain instead – especially spells that aren’t on the cleric spell list such as heat metal (level 2), fire shield (level 4), and fire seeds (level 6). One of the benefits of the Sun domain is gaining access to those spells – something clerics don’t normally have. Challenge Rating: 6 Your CR is 12. ;) Not that it matters. It’s also worth pointing out: Your CR of 12 includes your cohort and all your followers! They don’t have a CR; instead they’re folded into yours. Equipment: >>Snippy McSnip Strikes Again!<< I compute your gear to be worth 88,006. Of course, you have a boatload of cash left, so it’s a simple adjustment. Also, you’re right up against your light load limit of 24.75 pounds – and that’s not factoring in any sort of cost for the potions or gold you lug around (without a container to carry them in, I’d like to point out ;) ). The other thing on your equipment that’s worth mentioning: Cleric’s vestments specifically state they’re ceremonial, and not for adventuring. So you’d probably also want to toss in an explorer’s outfit, or something similar. Just a reminder for future contests: When you have a cohort, we’re quite OK with you stopping at his general stat line (Sir Cassius Bastion, human paladin 10). That’s plenty of info – and in fact, providing more can really only hurt your score, because it’s more chances for little math errors to creep in. That said, let’s move on to checking your cohort’s numbers. ;) Smite evil 3/day, turn undead ... lay on hands, aura of courage Again, and in my opinion, it’s a good idea to list values with these types of abilities. Otherwise, when you go to smite something you have to look it up; or when a dragon’s fear aura hits the group, you have to grab the book to remember what aura of courage does; and so on. Ride +13 Ride should be +15 – it gets a +2 synergy from Handle Animal. Overall, adding stats for your cohort didn’t hurt you much after all. Just the one suggestion, and the one forgotten synergy. Very nicely done! But now let’s check the special mount of your cohort... Gavinson, Bastion’s special mount Large Magical Beast Hit Dice: 7d8+21 (52 hp) Hmmm... Was Gavinson a light warhorse before becoming a special mount? That’s about the only way I can get 7 HD. The speed sort of proves that theory, too. Challenge Rating: ? It would be ‘—‘ just like your cohort’s should be. It’s all factored into Wellford’s challenge rating, in theory. Background Stuff Overall, I liked the story. I can imagine, overall, how he got where he is in levels. It’s not clear if the Scowling Prince is dead – but if I were DM, he wouldn’t be, at least for long. Plenty of solid hooks to work with, and good descriptions. Other Stuff While Wellford might be a name for a gnome, where’s the rest of it? ;) Does he have a last name? A nickname? I know some sources (such as Races of Stone) take it a little too far, you could give the poor guy a surname. :) Do you have access to Complete Divine? There’s a perfect prestige class for this character in that book called the Radiant Servant of Pelor. You did a spectacular job with the math. You set yourself up to lose a lot of points by doing full stat blocks for your cohort and his mount, but you pulled them both off very well. Kudos. Math Stuff hp 53 (5d6+5d8+10) I get 55, and the problem seems to be your satyr hit dice. Fey hit die is d8, not d6. That should account for the difference. Will +5 I get +7. Satyr hit dice give +4, 3 levels of ranger give +1, 2 levels of horizon walker give +0, and you have a +2 Wisdom mod. 4+1+0+2=+7. Base Atk +8; Grp +10 I get a BAB of +7. Satyr hit dice give you +2, ranger gives you +3, and horizon walker gives you +2. 2+3+2=7. Because of that your grapple should be +9 rather than +10 (but that’s just a “cascade” error). Melee Head butt +10/+5 melee (1d6+2) and Greatclub +7/+2 melee (1d10+4) When you combine natural attacks (the head butt) and manufactured weapons (the greatclub), you don’t get iterative attacks on both; in fact, you never gain iterative attacks with a natural weapon. You do, however, get to designate either your natural or manufactured weapon as your primary. If you choose to use the greatclub as your primary, your line would look like this: Greatclub +11/+6 (+7 BAB, +2 Str, +2 enhancement) 1d10+5 (+2 Str X 1.5 (2-handed weapon) =+3, +2 enhancement) and head butt +4 (BAB +7, Str +2, –5 for making it a secondary attack) 1d6+2. If you opted to make your natural weapon your primary, your line would look like this: Head butt +9 (+7 BAB, +2 Str) 1d6+2 and greatclub +6 (+7 BAB, +2 Str, +2 enhancement, –5 for secondary attack) 1d10+5 The satyr entry in the MM (and SRD) lists the head butt as the primary and the dagger as the secondary. I’m 99.99% certain, though, that you’re allowed to switch that when it’s beneficial (such as gaining iterative attacks with a weapon). Composite longbow +9/+9/+4 ranged (1d8+4) The attack value is off (it should be +8), but it’s because of a cascade error from your BAB. The other thing I’d like to point out here, though, is that you need to remember that you can’t always take a full round action with your bow. It might be good to indicate that a standard action attack is +10. Abilities (base+race+level+magic) Str 15 (13+0+0+2), Dex 13 (11+2), Con 12 (10+2), Int 16 (14+2), Wis 14 (12+2), Cha 18 (15+2+1) Here’s one that’s not entirely clear in the rules. I play it this way, and I’m either right or I’ve been playing with a house rule without really knowing (or caring). When I assign stats to a monstrous race (rather than using the ones present), I give the level increases to stats, even when they happen on racial hit dice. This means, for example, if I were your DM for this character, you could add another +1 to any stat. I know if you don’t change the base stats, the level bonus is assumed to be included; however, when you use the modifiers instead, I think you’re still entitled to the level bonus. It’ll be an interesting point to discuss, I suppose. It doesn’t affect your score, either. Favored Enemy (aberration) ... wild empathy I find it’s a good idea to list bonuses with abilities, so you don’t have to go look ‘em up. For example, your favored enemy might be +2 (and that’s pretty easy to remember), but do you remember all the skills it applies to? I know I always forget. And do you know your wild empathy number? To avoid looking it up, it’s not hard to just say “wild empathy (+7, +3 vs magical beasts).” Skills: >>Snippy McSnipp was here<< You have a racial bonus on Perform, and a good Charisma; and Perform can be used unskilled. I generally like seeing those sorts of skills on a character sheet – just in case. It’s not the sort of thing that’ll hurt your score, but I like to point it out. Hide +13 (8+0+1+0+0+4) ... Listen +10 (5+1+2+2) I get +17 for your Hide skill, and +14 for your Listen skill. Hide: 8 ranks, +1 Dex, +4 racial, +4 Horizon Walker bonus from forest terrain Listen: 6 ranks, +2 Wis, +2 Alertness, +4 Racial. It looks like the racial bonus is missing in both cases – which is interesting, because you have them in your totals for Spot and Move Silently, even though they aren’t listed in your breakdown. [containing 9 pp, 35 gp, 12 sp and 10 cp (936.3/1.34)] You’re value is way off here. One platinum piece is worth 10 gold pieces, so 9 pp are worth 90 gp. So 90+35+1.2+.1=126.3. Basically, you have 810 gp unaccounted for on your character sheet. Also – this is the first time I’ve ever seen weight for coins in an entry, I think. I forgot that the rules give coins a weight! (50 coins = 1 pound, for those who are curious). Kudos for going to that degree (though I get 1.32 as the weight, but I’m certainly not gonna quibble over .02 pounds in this case! Oathbow (25,600) Interesting that there’s no weight. I was going to mention that you should’ve used the weight of a longbow. But then I happened to look further down the page on the specific magic items section of the SRD, and noticed that shatterspike (a longsword) has a weight listed in the special entry. I think it’d be entirely reasonable if a DM wanted to say it weighed 3 pounds – but you seem to be right in that by the RAW, it has no weight. (of course, it’s weight doesn’t matter at all while it’s in your quiver, either – so maybe it’s entirely academic to figure it out). 18 two-pound, javelin-shaped iron bars Lunch? :D When I add up your equipment, I get a total of 87192. Add in the 810 gp mistake from earlier, and we end up popping just a bit over the limit of 88000. And I have a problem with that, but I don’t know how to account for it. Even though you didn’t buy Ferros, he still has value. For example, if you found a wild heavy horse and trained it, I would totally expect you to list the value of a heavy warhorse on your character sheet – even though you didn’t buy the horse, you found it. The problem, of course, is trying to determine the value of a rust monster. :twitch: Other creatures list a value, and that would be a starting place. Griffon eggs, for example, are worth 3500 gp each, while a young griffon is worth 7000 gp. Is that a reasonable comparison? Well, the griffon can fly, which has obvious benefits. But then, a griffon can’t turn an enemy’s equipment to junk with a touch attack either. I think the griffon at least gets us into the ballpark of the value of Ferros. We could quibble a bit over the actual price, but obviously he has to be worth something on your character sheet. Even if we halved the griffon’s price. Ferros ... Melee Antennae touch +14 melee (rust) (+9 BAB +5 Str +1 Weapon Focus -1 size) He also has a bite attack don’t forget. It’d be at +8 and would do 1d4+2 damage (half Strength). Grp +13 Don’t forget there’s a size bonus; it should be +17 (+9 BAB, +5 Str, +4 size). Track Interestingly (and not your fault per se), Ferros has no ranks in Survival, which makes the Track feat kinda useless. I know having scent allows an untrained Survival check – but it’s still always been one of those things that strikes me as odd. *shrug* If Jason were judging, he’d point out that you’re running around nekkid. Which might be totally OK for a satyr. Background Stuff :uh-huh: This might be the most.... unique entry ever in HC’s (brief) history. I’d allow him into a game – but I allow almost anything (though, of course, you have to accept the consequences, such as weird stares from people, racial hatred, and so on). And while I’d allow it, I’m not so sure an “average” DM would. That would be a big concern. For now, we’ll just look past that, because it’s not something really easy to judge on. You did a fine job describing both. It’s easy to get a vision in my mind about how they look (even if it is an odd vision). I’m not sure how your fellow players would feel about adventuring with a rust monster – especially if there were a proverbial “tank” in the party. I would hope they would play up to it, of course – not trusting it, being afraid to go near it, and so on. But some players might balk at the concept. I like backgrounds that include NPCs I can latch onto as a DM. You have the satyrs you left behind, and your former adventuring team. Seems they’d both fall under the “allies” category (which is fine). There’s no real named enemies for me to work with – though, of course, there could always be a rust monster hunter or whatever that gets wind of you. Aside from NPCs, you do have goals for a DM to work with. And, in fact, it’s a rather easy goal – explore the world and gain treasure. Overall, I think it would be fun to DM him. There’s the whole NPC reaction to both a satyr and a rust monster; and it shouldn’t be too hard to motivate him to go places. Other Stuff I like the horizon walker prestige class. I think it’s one of the better ones presented as far as overall cost/benefit balance goes. Mikolos is an odd and interesting character. I think it’d take some work for a DM and party to integrate him – getting past the whole rust monster thing should cause a party to balk, after all. Going into towns, also, should cause problems. But as long as you were willing to accept that sort of grief, it looks fun! Math Stuff [quote] HP 52 This is a lot more than what I’m computing for your character. I get 40. You have 4 at first level, 2.5 each additional level (for a total of 26.5), and +10 from your Con. 4+26+10=40.I’m not sure where the other 12 are coming from. another +2 Will if enchantment As a nit pick, you get the bonus to any save if the spell is an enchantment. While the grand majority of enchantment spells do allow Will saves, I wouldn’t be surprised to find one somewhere that allowed either a Fort or Reflex save. Immune to sleep effect Another nit pick; you’re immune to any magical sleep effect, not just the sleep spell. For example, you’re also immune to the spell deep slumber. +1 special power (enchantments) Nope, not in my book. Wizards are common, and enchantment spells are a normal tool of wizards. +2 Great Renown (among drow) I’m always loathe to allow a new character access to this bonus (as well as the “fairness and generosity” bonus). In my opinion, both of those bonuses need to be earned through roleplay; they aren’t just something you decide your character has. Even with that aside, as far as the drow are concerned, your character is dead. So how would she have “great renown” among them? Skills: >>Snippy McSnip was here<< It’s interesting you don’t have any of your skills maxed out. Your max ranks are 13. Was there a reason you went with 10 ranks in your skills instead of max on at least a few key skills (like Spellcraft or Concentration)? And, sort of related, you only spent 73 skill points; you have another 21 points you could spend. Spellcraft: +18 (10 ranks, +8 modifier) You gain a +2 bonus when using Spellcraft in conjunction with the enchantment school, and a -5 penalty when using it for either evocation or abjuration. It’s good to mention these things near where the skill is, because putting it elsewhere makes it easy to forget. Also, you gain a +2 bonus to Spellcraft from a synergy with Knowledge (arcana). You have other synergies not listed, too. Knowledge (local) gives you a +2 to Gather Information (for a total of +4 unskilled). You have a bunch of circumstantial bonuses to Survival (on planes, above ground). Spells: 4/6/6/4/4/3, Not counting your bonus enchantment spell, your spells per day should be 4/6/6/5/5/3. A 10th level wizard has 4/4/4/3/3/2, and your Int mod gives you bonus spells of 0/2/2/2/2/1/1/1/1 (though the bonus slots for 6th through 8th level don’t do you any good yet). You also probably want to find a way to indicate which spells are enchantments, because of the bonus you get from your feats to the save DC. (Scrolls and Wondrous Items at 75% cost if able to craft) So I think I’ll have a discussion about this in the suggestion thread; you’re supposed to have any scroll or wondrous item at 75% of the cost, not just the ones you can craft. I originally proposed the rule based on how Dungeon magazine handles it; here’s why, using an example from your character. You could’ve found that cloak of resistance +3, or you could’ve made it. Obviously, it’s to your advantage here to say you made it – then it only costs you half the list price, especially since we don’t penalize XP. So, as a means to balance all that out, any item that comes under your Craft feats is at 75%. In some cases, you get a bargain, because you save 25% off the listed price (for example, if you had a scroll of wish). In other cases, you’re paying a little more (the cloak, for example). The thought is that it balances out (more or less) in the end, while still making those feats useful to you. Because it was probably unclear how this works (and why), I’m not going to “deduct points” for items where you had the wrong cost. And I’ll rewrite the clause of the rules for future coordinating judges to include. When I add up your items (using the values you have listed), I get a total value of 87949. That leaves you another 51 gold to spend. As always, being under is significantly better than being over. Ring: Protection +2 and Sustenance (10,500) I’m not clear if this is one ring (with the abilities combined) or two rings. It’s written as though it’s one ring, but it’s priced as two rings. If you intended this to be one ring, the price would be 11,750 (start with the ring of protection, which costs 8000; add the ring of sustenance, which costs 2500; however, you need to increase the cost of the sustenance part by 50%). Robe of Arachnida (10,500) So... you took the cloak of arachnida and moved the slot to the robe slot? Some DMs might have a problem with that, though I don’t see a problem since the robe slot is described as “various effects.” Scroll of Modrenkainen’s Lubrication (1650) :rofl: The spell is Mordenkainen’s lucubration. 100 lb of firewood (20 baths) (.05) I’m not sure how you get 20 baths out of this. One day’s worth of firewood weighs 20 pounds and costs 1 copper. So, based on both the weight and cost, you bought 5 of these. You take 4 baths per day? Large Tub (5) ... 5 Barrels of Springwater (25) Where’d you get the cost for these? Billowy Cloak (3) (can conceal gaudy outfits, large pocket for Fuzzy, black) You have a magical cloak. Are you wearing both? Str 16 Dex 10 Con 12 Int 10 Wis 10 Cha 14 That looks like 30 points to me. In order to get a 14 Charisma, you would need to buy a 16 since elans have a -2 penalty. That gives you ability costs of 10/2/4/2/2/10, which adds up to 30. Saves: +5/+7/+9 I get +4 for your Fort. Soulknives have a base Fort save of +2, and you have a +1 Con mod. You also have a +1 cloak. Amulet of Persuasion (4,500) Is this a circlet of persuasion reslotted? If so, the cost should be multiplied by 1.5 for being in an uncustomary space (necklace is for protection and discernment). So the cost should actually be 6750. +1 ring of lesser darkvision (30ft) (6,000) Well, let’s start off simple. What’s the “+1” for? That aside, I’m OK with the method you used for pricing. Taking a look at existing items that do similar things is the ideal way of pricing a new magic item. Another (not as good) way to price it would be to turn the darkvision spell into a continuous use item. You start with the formula of spell level (2) X caster level (3) X 2000, for a total of 12,000. If you want to reduce the distance down to 30 feet, that’s definitely worthy of a price reduction. How much? I don’t think half is reasonable – darkvision to 30’ is better than not having it all. Knocking off 40%, though, isn’t bad; that would drop the cost down to 7200. In the end, though, I’m personally OK with your 6K price. Background Stuff So I’ll say right off the bat: I don’t like the “cohort is actually a hired merc to kill the master” sort of thing. In my opinion, it goes against the entire purpose of the Leadership feat – to have a completely loyal person tag around with you. It’s made doubly worse in this contest. The whole concept is to weave your cohort (or whatever) into your story. And you haven’t really done that at all, in my mind. She has a cohort (who serves as a bodyguard), he follows her around, and that’s that. There’s no special treatment; there’s no cool backstory about the true cohort who has been replaced. The elan is just there, waiting to hear from his true master. In my mind, that doesn’t really fit what we wanted in this contest. The other problem I have with your background is the size of it. I don’t want (or expect) novels; but you’re ECL 12, and you did something to gain all that power. Tell me about it. Nothing about your background, really, prevents me from copy/pasting it and using it for a much lower level character. In fact, I think it’d be a fine character background for an ECL 3 drow enchanter. You need to provide more than “all the drow hate her and tried to kill her.” On the plus side, I enjoyed the spots where you let your sense of humor show through in the writing. What you provided was easy and fun to read – I just wish there was a little more to it. Another plus: You hit the spider theme beautifully! You wove it into your outfit and jewelry and choice of magic items very well. Other Stuff Interestingly, I’m working on an enchanter myself for a new game. I’m taking the character I posted back a while ago (Avesteri Leafstrider) and altering the character to fit the parameters of the game (I need to take away a level, alter stats, and lose some equipment). I find the enchantment school really fun – but also really frustrating, because so many things are immune or get rocking bonuses.
Zherog 03-16-07, 02:38 PM	Moving right along.... Math Stuff HD 4D10+6D12+20 How many hit points? If you took paladin at first level, you’d have 85; if you took knight at first level, you’d have 86. AC 26, touch 11, flat-footed 25 I get an AC of 25 (10 + 1 Dex, +9 armor, +5 shield), and a flat-footed AC of 24. I can’t find that other point of AC. The only thing I can think of is you’re applying Shield Block to your AC, though that ability only applies against one (designated) target. Smite Evil, Turn Undead In my opinion it’s always a good idea to list the benefits of these abilities (and others, like lay on hands). Otherwise, you have to look ‘em up during the game session to use them, and that slows down the game and (in my opinion) hurts the immersion of the other characters into the game. SV Fort +17, Ref +10, Will +10 I get +15/+11/+14. Base saves for a 4th level pally are 4/1/1. Base saves for a 6th level knight are 2/2/5, for a total base save of 6/3/6. Ability mods are 2/1/1, for a total of 8/4/7. Your Charisma bonus (+6) brings those up to 14/10/13. Then, add your luckstone for another +1 to each, for final totals of +15/+11/+14. Great save numbers – it makes you one of the most difficult characters to affect in this contest – just a bit off. STR 14, DEX 12, CON 15, INT 14, WIS 12, CHA 22 I had a heck of a time backing into these. Eventually, I figured out that you started off with a 12 Charisma and put your two level adjustments into this ability. Skills: >>Snippy McSnip was here<< Wow, this was hard to back into. It was made especially hard by not knowing what class you took at what level, because paladin and knight have significantly different skill lists. Also, I think you forgot to include the armor check penalty to Climb, Jump and Swim. Climb and Jump should each have a -6 penalty, and Swim should have a -12 penalty. I spent about 30 minutes trying to back into your totals various ways, and I was unable to do so. At one point, I had all your skill points spent, no armor check penalty included, and I was unable to spend skill points on Sense Motive or Swim. This was a huge problem point for me in verifying your character. Intelligence 15, Wisdom 16, Charisma 15 This isn’t one of the options for the mental stats of an intelligent item, so I’m not sure how to begin pricing it. Based on other abilities, you used one of two rows on the table with three lesser powers – I just can’t figure out which. I can’t even figure it out based on costs. So here’s what I have, and you can offer up corrections on where you got costs. Dragonhide full plate costs 3300 gp. Regular full plate costs 1500, and making it masterwork adds another 150 to that cost for a total of 1650 for masterwork full plate. Dragonhide costs double that, for a total of 3300. Making it +1 adds in another 1000 gp, for a running total of 4300. The ability to cast bless three times per day costs 1000 gp, for a running total of 5300. 10 ranks in Knowledge (history) has a cost of 5000, for a running total of 10,300. Minor image once per day costs 2200, for a running cost of 12,500 gp. You listed the cost as 16,200. So if we subtract the above running cost from that we get 3700 gp. But none of the base costs for an intelligent item have that value. We need to add either 5000 gp or 6000 gp to the cost; so the cost of the armor seems like it should be either 17,500 or 18,500. Equipment: When I add up the value of your equipment, I get a total of 83959. That leaves you a significant chunk left to spend (but see above about the cost of your armor). As a fourth level paladin with a Wisdom of 12, you have the ability to cast one spell per day. That ability isn’t noted anywhere on your character sheet. Background Stuff Very interesting sidekick! And a cool story. I really liked how several useful and interesting items were created from the ritual – including a luckstone. I really wish it cost a little bit less. I think 20K is a bit on the high side of prices. I would’ve liked more information on Thibaude; the majority of the background type info seems to focus on Imychtazid (which is a great name for a dragon, by the way). Tell me a bit more how she gained her levels. What are some of the foes she defeated before meeting the dragon, for example? You give a few ideas of what has happened since, and those were great. Her allies and enemies that a DM could latch onto seem vague, and some don’t seem too level appropriate. For example, a merc band charging a toll on the bridge. They make a decent enemy, but were they real hardened criminals, or just some low level thugs that she slaughtered without breaking a sweat? Don’t get me wrong – there’s a lot I like about the background. It’s creatively awesome. I just wish there was a little bit more to it Finally, your writing style is easy to read. That’s a good thing. :) Other Stuff I can’t speak for other judges, but I really like when contestants break down how they got certain numbers on their character sheets. You didn’t give me anything, which makes it harder to back into your numbers – and also makes mistakes cost you a bit more. It also really hurts your clarity score – for example, I can’t tell if you took paladin or knight at first level. Math Stuff (assuming full HP at first level) You assume correctly, though you should round down instead of up (so you should have 70, not 71). BAB/Grapple: +12/+11 Hmmm... by my math, your grapple mod should be +19. You have a +12 BAB, +3 Str, -4 size, +8 Combat Stability bonus. 12+3-4+8=+19. An amazing number for a kobold! Looks like you forgot to include your bonus from Combat Stability. Combat Stability Very useful for a Small sized character – especially since your bonus goes up to +8. Standard Kit (20 gp) Is this the standard kit found on page 216 of PHB2? If so, the listed price is 15 gp, not 20. I’m confused... Traveler's Outfit - 1gp You’re allowed one of these for free. When I add up all your equipment, I get a grand total cost of 87,570. That leaves you an additional 430 that’s unspent. Under is better than over, though. Also, her Con score is going to make her a little soft in combat; you have fast healing 2, which is better than nothing – but it won’t keep you alive from large hits. You have a decent AC for your level, so that helps. But I would be concerned about hitting her too hard in combat. Background Stuff Your character is interesting, and well written. It sounds fun to play, and comes replete with plot hooks galore. But, in my opinion, you didn’t really embrace the goal of the contest. You have a cohort, but we don’t really hear much about him in your story. I also question the overall “playability” of the character. Don’t get me wrong, she’s really cool and seems to have some really fun combat options. But why, for example, would she hook up with a party of humans, elves, gnomes, and so on and go adventuring – when she really should be protecting kobolds? Other Stuff A bit of Dread Pirate Roberts syndrome? :D Citing your sources would’ve been nice. I spent a lot of time (relatively speaking) trying to find a lot of your feats and such. This character does much better as a Crusader from the ToB. I don’t have Tome of Battle yet, but I’ve heard good things about it. It’s on my list of stuff to pick up in the future. Math Stuff Turn undead (Su):>>snippy<< Yay for including this info on your character sheet! Level-6 ... imbued (vigor) summon monster V (1d3 celestial lions; CL 14th) OR summon monster VI (Bralani; CL 14th) I don’t think you’re actually prepping a summon monster V in this slot, but instead prepping SM6 and using it to summon extra critters from 5’s list, correct? Equipment You’re missing a spell component pouch. Metamagic rod, lesser-maximize 14,000gp 14,000gp You don’t have a weight listed. Under the basic rules for rods, it lists 5 pounds as the weight of a rod. Coins (53pp, 93gp,24sp) 634.4gp 3.4 lbs I compute the value of these coins as 625.4. fifty-three platinum is worth 530 gp; 24 silver is worth 2.4 gold. 530+93+2.4=625.4. The weight appears to be correct however. I compute your overall gear to be worth 87991 – but the difference is caused by the 9 gold piece difference in the value of your cash. And as I’ve said to others, having too little is better than having too much. Challenge Rating: 4 Technically speaking, Benito doesn’t have a CR; it’s built into Fiero’s challenge rating. Summoning Stuff I was glad to see you included this. Not much is worse than sitting at the table when a player declares, “I summon celestial lions! Er... give me a minute to figure out the stats of those, since I have the Augment Summoning feat.” I didn’t go through and verify the math on each of those. Background Stuff I liked the on-going relationship between the pair prior to Benito becoming the planar cohort. That was the basic goal – to have a “sidekick” that was integrated into who the character is. until his village was raided by a large band of gnolls. At least it wasn’t orcs or goblins. :) Your background is exactly the sort where I ensure the player encounters at least one person he knew previously who has come back as an undead. Your parents are both prime candidates, though I might just go with a childhood friend or neighbor. You need more background. Almost everything you have happens to Fiero before he even takes his first level. So how’d he gain 12 levels? What challenges did he overcome after joining the priesthood? Has he made any friends or adversaries in the priesthood – a rival priest, perhaps? There’s one really big plot hook, of course (defeating slavery*), and it should be pretty easy for a DM to set up some scenarios to involve your character. Of course, giving the DM a named foe (or organization even) to hunt down would be a little better, in my opinion. Other Stuff In the last HC, I gave jennibert kudos for building what I thought was the most accurate stat block I’ve judged in one of these contests up to that point. You, sir, have managed to surpass her. :tiphat: If you accept suggestions... Here’s two. I worry about your Reflex save, especially coupled with your slightly low hit points. For example, a wizard of your level who casts cone of cold against you is going to inflict 12d6 cold damage, Reflex save for half. If we build the wizard the same as you (though with Spell Focus (evocation) instead of conjuration), the save DC is going to be 23. You would need to roll a 19 or 20 to make the save. If you fail, you’ll take (on average) 42 damage, leaving you at 17. Alternatively, that same wizard could drop a fireball and activate his rod of metamagic (lesser maximize) and inflict 60 points of damage on you. Now, the save DC is a little easier – but you’d still need to roll a 17 or better, and failure would drop you to -1. So I would think for the future, Fiero would be searching for items to improve his Reflex saves (better cloak of resistance, gloves of Dex, stone of good luck, and so on. Second: You could improve your armor, shield, and weapons by virtue of some spellcasting. Magic vestment is a third level cleric spell; casting it would increase the enhancement bonus on your shield or armor to +3. It’ll last 12 hours per casting (and it’s a legal target for your rod, so you could effectively make it last all day). Given the spell, you wouldn’t need to purchase a +2 enhancement, and could instead either get another +1 ability (for the same overall cost), or funnel the cash into another item you’d like to have. Similarly, you have access to the 4th level spell greater magic weapon that will do the same thing for your spear. The downside to relying on those spells, of course, is you become more vulnerable to dispel magic. * I’ve done the “I will bring an end to slavery” character – it’s definitely a fun concept. I played a holy liberator in a Forgotten Realms game; at one point in the game, the character wandered into a Red Wizard of Thay enclave to purchase some magic items – without knowing the Red Wizards are slavers. He ended up starting a huge brawl between his party and those in the enclave, freeing all their slaves. That, of course, caused the Red Wizards to hunt him down. Crazy fun. He eventually died, of course, because you don’t anger large groups of wizards with access to crazy-powerful spells. Math Stuff Darkvision 60’ Low-Light vision Interesting little bit. The stat block for the ogre says they have low-light vision. However, the “ogres as characters” section doesn’t mention that they get it. Weird. Doesn’t affect your score, because I believe you’re correct... AC: 26 (+3 Armor, +5 Shield, -1 size, +5 natural, +3 deflection, +1 insight ) You should include touch and flat-footed ACs. Your touch is 13, and your flat-footed is 26. HP: 114 (4d8 + 5d10 + 60) You have 6d10, not 5d10. Your total is correct, though, so it’s just a typo. Will: +7 (+3 base, +2 Wis, +1 cha, +1 luckstone) Wow. I’m in the process of building an enchanter for a game I’m about to start playing in. I’d love to come across Balrock with that Will save. By the time I’m 12th level, my save DC for enchantments is going to be around 20+spell level. Even with a simple first level spell, you’d need to roll a 14 or better. Now, you have an advantage, sort of, because Balrock is of the giant type rather than humanoid – so my enchanter wouldn’t be able to use charm person or dominate person on you. But still... And, of course, your Reflex save is dreadfully low, too. But you have the hit points to withstand several direct hits from damaging spells (the most likely to require a Reflex save). Skills: >>Snippy McSnip Was Here!<< Man. That’s painful... Monkey Grip (CW 103) This has to be among my least favorite feats available in the game. It’s horrible. It costs you a -2 penalty on attack rolls, and gives you an average of +1 damage. That’s a really poor trade off, and the fact they charge one of your precious few feat slots for that is a crime. Turn Undead: 4/day, +1 attempt damage 2d6+4 (level 3) ... Smite evil 2/day +1 attack, +6 damage ... Lay hands (6 hp/day) Yay for listing the details! Special mount (Done Kee) So... there’s a basic problem with Done Kee being your mount. He’s too small. You’re Large, and so you require a Huge mount. Done Kee is Medium. Obviously, you don’t ride him – because you’d crush him like a pancake. I’d probably allow it – but I’m willing to wager there’s DMs out there who would enforce the rules. Also – nice Shrek reference. :D Saves: Fort +9, Ref +6, Will +4 I’m computing Done Kee as having a +10 Fort save. He can share your base save, which is +9, and Done Kee has a Con mod of +1. Abilities: Str 11, Dex 14, Con 12, Int 6, Wis 11, Cha 4 Given those numbers, I’m gonna guess you put the bump from the 4th hit die into Dex? You didn’t list your speed (40’) any where. Normally, Climb and Jump are pretty easy to figure out when you have no ranks. However, don’t forget that because you have the higher than “normal” speed you get a bonus on Jump checks (+4). So it might be useful to include Jump in your skills, just so you don’t ever forget this bonus. Bag of rags (healer kit) (50gp) Then why don’t you have Heal listed under your skills? When I add up your gear, I get a total of 88013.46. You have enough cash, though, that it’d be easy to get you down to the right amount. Background Stuff Normally, I like backgrounds that are written in the 1st person. But to be frank, this one was painful to read due to Balrock’s speech patterns. I had to re-read several pieces, and even stopped and came back at one point. Balrock big and strong. Grow up with Ogres, but mom different. Her have less hair and pale skin. Her teach Balrock human speak. Mom nice. Dad strong. Dad mean. Him beat Balrock up. Him teach Balrock get shinies. Mom teach Balrock do good. So this confused me a bit. Is Balrock’s mom human? Or just a weird looking ogre? If she’s human, shouldn’t Balrock be a half-ogre (though that’s not available in the sources we allowed)? I’m also not clear on the current status of Thomas. Is he alive, but somewhere else? Is he dead? Is it left for the DM to decide/figure out? DM mote[sic] after the fight Balrock reached the level of paladin to summon his special mount and the mount came in the form of a donkey. He does not realize that he summoned it he feels the donkey is his best friend in the whole world. Every morning he looks for the donkey and calls it without realizing he is actually summoning it. At his level, his mount is only available for 12 hours per day. What does Balrock do for the other 12 hours? Does he wander around half the day looking for him? Does he not notice? Otherwise, your background has the stuff I look for: plot hooks (preferably via allies and enemies), a decent description of how you came about your class, and a description of how you gained experience. Math Stuff Race Half-Celestial Elf Build Knight* 8 So right off the bat I have concerns about your survivability. That’s the biggest problem with a lot of the templates – half-celestial, half-fiend, and half-dragon all have an LA that’s prohibitively high. When I DM, I don’t pull punches – and those “missing” four levels might really hurt you. For example, you’d have 4d12+8 more hp – or 34 more. That’s a lot. It’s not something that hurts your score overall, but I did want to point it out. You also get a Z rant (see Jason’s comments for some others): Why the heck is the half-celestial more powerful than a celestial? I’ve never been able to figure that out... Just about everything the celestial gets, the half-celestial gets better. Str 20 (14 Base, +4 Racial, +1@4th Level, +1@8th Level) (+5 Modifier) Dex 16 (12 Base, +4 Racial) (+3 Modifier) Con 14 (12 Base, +2 Racial) (+2 Modifier) Int 14 (12 Base, +2 Base) (+2 Modifier) Wis 12 (8 Base, +4 Racial) (+1 Modifier) Cha 23 (15 Base, +4 Racial, +4 Enchantment) (+6 Modifier) So, base stats of 14, 12, 12, 12, 8, 15? That costs 6, 4, 4, 4, 0, and 8 points – for a total of 26 points. You have two more to spend somewhere. AC 28 (... +3 Shield...) I’m trying to figure out how it’s +3; a heavy steel shield has a +2 AC bonus, and mithral doesn’t change that. Your shield block class ability only applies against one foe (sort of like the Dodge feat) so it shouldn’t be included in your base AC. Melee +14/+10 (d8+6`/19-20x2, Arm of Heironeous) OR +14/+9 (d8+2d6+6/19-20x2, Arm of Heironeous vs Evil) Why is the second attack lower when facing an evil foe? Well, actually, the better question is: Why is the second attack at +10 instead of +9 against non-evil foes, because +9 is the correct value. Skills:>>Snippy McSnip Strikes Again!<< It probably would be a good thing to indicate that Diplomacy and Knowledge (religion) are cross class skills somehow. In addition, you have a total of 44 skill ranks to spend (16 at first level, 4 each of the other 7 levels). But it looks like you spent 46 skill points. After I was unable to verify your skills on my own, I resorted to your table. Level 6: Knight, Intimidate+1, Jump+1, Knowledge (Religion)+1, Ride+1 (4 skill ranks) So here’s one problem I think. This would cost you a total of 5 skill points, not 4, because Knowledge (religion) is a cross class skill for knights. The other problem is that your skills show you having 5 ranks in Knowledge (nobility and royalty), but in your table you only spend 4 ranks (all at first level). Those two combined confirm my assessment that you spent two skill points too many. Arm of Heironeous (+1 Holy Longsword) (18,350 gp) Your price is wrong. A longsword costs 15gp; making it masterwork increases the price by 300, for a total of 315. A +3 equivalent weapon costs 18000, for a grand total of 18315, not 18350. I like the name, though. Traveler’s Outfit (1 gp) This is free. Barded Heavy Warhorse (1600 gp) What kind of barding? Barding is just armor built for a horse. It costs 4 times as much; and a heavy warhorse costs 200 gp – so we know the armor costs a total of 1400. If we divide that by 4 we get a cost of 350. The only things I can find for that cost would be a masterwork breastplate or masterwork splint mail. You also don’t have a saddle for your mount (though you have a pack saddle, presumably for your mule). I suppose you technically ought to have a bit & bridle too. Finally, when I add up your items, I get a total of 87964. However, the difference is because you overpaid for the longsword (by 35 gp), and paid for the clothes (1 gp). Add those in and you’re right on the mark. Irador: Male Elf Wizard 4, specializes in Divination, prohibited schools are Necromancy or Conjuration Hmmm.. did you mean to say or? When you pick divination as your specialty, you only need to give up one school. But you have to pick – you can’t leave it open ended like this. Background Stuff A bit of white space would’ve helped make your text a bit more readable. I know there’s a lot of different styles out there (tabbing the first line of a paragraph, using a blank line, etc). I prefer a blank line. But even the tabs would’ve helped; as it was, you had a rather large block of text. and she barely kept him alive through his long, hard rehabilitation. This sort of stuff is great in fiction. But it really doesn’t work well in D&D. Curative magic is readily available in the default game – even NPC spellcasters (adepts) have access to it. Potions are – in theory – plentiful. And if there’s only wizards around, several critters on the various summon monster spell lists have the ability to use cure spells. glowing with beautiful ruins :rofl: I think you mean “runes.” Power Attacking relentlessly, he attempts to overrun his opponent But, frankly, you can’t really afford to Power Attack relentlessly. Overall, your attack bonuses are pretty low. Compare them, for example, to some of the ACs of the other contestants in this contest. Araithor, Jason’s character, has a 26 AC. Even if you Power Attack for only 1 point, you then need to roll a 13 or better to hit him on your first attack. Thibaude (Orchomenos’s character) has the same AC. This is what I was talking about earlier in your section about the “cost” of the “half” templates. The LA is so high that it ends up gimping your character more than helping. That said, this section is about your background, not your math, eh? It’s quite well written. Even with the lack of white space, it was easy to keep going. The biggest problem with your background is you sort of force the DM’s hand. He more or less has to have a campaign based on a war between demons and elves & dwarves. It’s possible, of course, to have adventures not based on the “main” part of the war – defending a little village, tracking down an assassin before he reaches the court, etc. The other problem I had with your background was the believability factor. Like I said about your parents – what you have is great for fiction, when you can build a world around that concept. But in D&D, a lot of what you described just wouldn’t happen. Teleportation, banishment, healing, and so on should be fairly common in a “core” style game. But, it’s fiction; I can sort of look past it. You have some enemies (the orc chief, the major you punched, the demons). You have plenty of allies (named and otherwise). You have plot hooks, you have deeds done to earn your levels. So you have all the hallmarks I look for. Other Stuff You’re a good writer. Your story was engaging, even with a few typos in it. Math Stuff AC: 26 (+8 armor, +3 shield, +5 Dex) + Light Fortification (25% chance of critical & sneak attack failing) You forgot touch (15) and flat-footed (21) ACs. Will: +12 (+7 Bard, +3 Paladin, +2 Vest of Resistance) Psst. I think you mean “seeker of the song” not “paladin.” :) 9th: Ironskin Chant [Complete Adventurer, pg. 113] This feat looks like a real weak choice to me. If it granted the DR to every ally in range, it might be worthwhile, but giving one creature low-end DR for one round seems like a weak feat to me. *shrug* Spellcraft: +5 (+5 ranks) - +2 synergy on scrolls from UMD Knowledge (arcana) grants you a +2 synergy bonus on this skill. And a comment that doesn’t cost you points, but I think is worth pointing out. In my opinion, the D&D skill system rewards “specialization.” That is, it’s in your interest to be really good at your skills. And, for the most part, you’ve done that. Things like Knowledge (arcana) and Concentration and Tumble and Use Magic Device and (of course) Perform are all at or near their max ranks. But then you have, for example, 1 rank in Swim. Why? If you find yourself thrust into water, it’s probably not going to make the difference between drowning and not drowning. You have 4 ranks in Move Silently. Again, why? Moving Silently is anathema to a bard’s abilities (Elan aside), and 4 ranks at level 12 really aren’t going to help much. Listen and Diplomacy are the same thing. In my opinion, it’s in your interest to pick one of those skills to be really good at, rather than dabbling in all of them. Diplomacy has a lot of uses, and seems to fit your character concept. Maybe some of your “dabbling” skill points could’ve gone there instead. Taking the rank out of Swim, for example, isn’t going to significantly change your ability, but putting it in Diplomacy does help – especially if some other stray ranks find their way into that skill. Anyway, that’s just my opinion... Other than the synergy bonus everything checked out OK with your skills. Equipment ... Total 87602.6gp I got a total of 87602.57 for all the stuff up to this point. Three copper isn’t much to quibble over – especially since you have the cash to offset it. I notice you have a horse, but no ranks in Ride. Does that mean that in combat you dismount? You also don’t tell me what items you’re carrying and what items your horse is carrying. If we go ahead and assume that everything you list after your horse is being carried by the horse, that would mean Don is carrying 28.5 pounds. That’s still in the light load range for his Strength (anything up to 33 pounds is light), but I also wonder if he isn’t actually carrying some of that stuff – such as the torch or the cash or the climber’s kit. I guess my point is that I would need to know what the horse is carrying in order to determine if you have an encumbrance issue. Speaking of stuff... You bought one candle, one piece of paper, one piece of parchment, one piece of chalk, and one torch. Isn’t that... useless? Wouldn’t it make more sense to have multiples? Or even a notebook rather than loose pieces of paper to write on? Int 14, Cha 14, Wis 10 Speaks Common Intelligent items get bonus languages for high Int just like creatures. Cyrano should speak two additional languages. 30ft vision & hearing I know you copied another, existing magic item. But using the item creation stuff for intelligent weapons, this should be 120 feet, not 30 feet. Yeah, you’re actually getting more for your money. And, in fact, there seems to be quite a bit wacky about the price. Bosk doesn’t seem to be in the SRD (as far as I can tell, none of the intelligent items are), so at the moment I don’t have anything to compare it to. If I look at the pricing guidelines for an intelligent item, though, the cost comes out to be 29820 rather than 25820. Here’s how I got that. +3 equivalent rapier = 18320 Basic intelligence of 14, 14, 10 = +4000 Bless 3/day = +1000 Hold person 3/day = +6500 I really want to get this done during the day, rather than having to look it up tonight at home when I have a DMG available. So, I’m going to consider the price “wrong” but not necessarily hammer your score because of it (because I think the way you backed into the price is reasonable). I’ll post additional comments later tonight after I have a chance to review the item you used as a base. Background Stuff [i]Very entertaining! I would’ve liked a little more, though. Here’s a few things. He has 12 levels. You glossed over events that gave him experience, though. There’s the disguised giants, there’s mention of defeating a dragon. There’s the general “he went adventuring” sort of stuff. Is that the extent of his experience: a dragon, some giants, and other little stuff? Give me some details. Tell me a story about the dragon’s lair, or another major encounter. The other thing in your background that I think lacks a bit is Don’s discovery of the primal music. For a Seeker of the Song, this is supposed to be a life changing sort of event. It’s the sort of event that shapes the character’s life from that point forward. Yet your entire description of the encounter is four sentences, 63 words. Shouldn’t such an impactful event have more? Enemies It wouldn’t be hard at all to find someone that didn’t like Don, Key Hotay. While he has rarely been cruel or caused problems deliberately, he has been the source of many difficulties. This doesn’t really fly with me, either. He’s gained 12 levels and has no enemies? There’s no brother of one of the giants? No arch-nemesis who regularly escapes? No jilted lover? No angry parent of a former lover? Basically, Don seems well written. And while there’s some simple plot hooks to work with, there aren’t too many “defining” plot hooks. There’s no big bad guy I could have Don chase down. There’s no hunt for the fabled harp of making beautiful music, but with a lousy name. You do a fantastic job of describing Don, but I think you fall a little bit short when it comes time to give your DM some plot hooks. San seems integrated well enough into your background. Cyrano just seems to be – at the moment – another piece of treasure that happens to be able to recite poetry. Other Stuff Awesome name and all that! :rofl: And I really can’t stress it enough: While I offered some criticism of your background for the stuff it lacks, it’s really well written and entertaining. Endarrion and Shan_TheBabau_Burke: I will provide you some comments in the coming days. I'm not going to delve into quite the level of detail I did for the others, but I promise I'll read over your characters and offer some feedback.
Comus 03-16-07, 02:57 PM	Just as a reply to the comments on my entry - I intentionally didn't include the combat stability bonuses, as they aren't constantly active. 'Standard Kit' is the 20gp worth of items listed below it. Its something I give to all my first-level characters, because it tends to cover a lot of what they need in odd situations. The traveler's outift listed is an extra set of clothing. She also actually gets fast healing 4, note. I tried to embrace the contest in a 'Cohort becomes the Master' type of way. I gave her Leadership purely to show that she is indeed grooming someone to replace her when she dies. Oh, and the reason why she'd be with other races is actually covered in the background. To cite myself: "Caitia is currently on one such task, lending assistance to a band of heroes in their fight against an evil wizard. She hopes that tales of her heroism will work to change popular views of kobolds, making them more accepted in society at large." And, over in personality... "Caitia sees every sentient as being equal - not surprising, considering there aren't many peoples kobolds can look down on."
Kit_the_Odd 03-16-07, 03:04 PM	Thanks for the comments Z! I'll post my responses in a spoiler block since the other judges haven't posted yet. I know Cyrano is a bit oddly priced and doesn't fit the rest. Here's why. I could not for the life of me figure out how Bosk (in the DMG) was priced the way it was, but because it fit so well I went it it as a baseline as a safety net over making a mistake in the intellegent item creation process (something I'd never done before). And thematically Cyrano is left over from my original idea for this contest, where an intellegent item (Cyrano) was both sidekick and mentor to the PC. The idea was for the character to get Cyrano and then for Cyrano to have a mentor type relationship even to the point of the character picking up some levels of Swashbuckler. The problem was that even the lowest priced Cyrano I could make wouldn't be available to a PC until quite late in the levels. Too late to make a radical change and still be effective unless the character was built in that direction from the begining, which kind of ruined the 'mentor' aspect of the item. So with only a day or so left before the deadline I completely changed direction when I got the idea for Don. But after all the fun I had thinking about Cyrano I just had to include him. :) The difference in total price of equipment is probably due to rounding in the spreadsheet I used. I'll have to check and make sure I increase the number of decimal points next time. Most of your other comments I'll just have to claim that I missed them becuase I changed concepts so late in the game. That probably isn't true, but it will make me feel better.:P Thanks again for your comments!
JasonOrlandoHawk 03-16-07, 05:52 PM	First, I'd like to thank you for taking the time to acknowledge my profession... :bravo: As for my Grapple score, you're right! I laid out my basic stats when before I bought equipment, and I forgot to adjust my Grapple when I bought the Belt of Giant's Strength. I did err on Whitewind's stats a bit. The strength score is too low. I believe I accidently included the +4 vs. Non-Lethal in Whitewind's Fort. save total. As for his Reflex save... wishful thinking? :D As for the Focused Ability on my shield, I did intend to cite it, but I switched to using asteriks in the middle of my equipment section, and I forgot to go back and change my previous notes. Oops! I agree w/ both rants whole-heartedly. In particular, I do think Paladin's get cheated on the Remove Disease x/week progression. The money issue doesn't bother me as much, especially since I usually have about 5,000-6,000gp unused, saving up for a particular item @ this level. However, the Paladin class really needs something more useful than Remove Disease x/week. As for the potion issue, that's really just the nervous gamer in me showing up. I live in constant fear, despite the fact I've never encountered a DM that does this, that one day, I will face an enemy spellcaster whose first action is to cast Shatter on my precious potion collection. Thus, I never carry more than 5 or 6 potions, and I stash the others somewhere safe. The potions were divided up based on the fact that my character was giant hunting. Thank you for your compliments concerning my background. In retrospect, my background may have ended on too much of a cliffhanger. I was trying to have a villain worth of the mighty Z's approval. I did try to keep my character from being too "spot-light stealing" by making him, shall we say, slightly "commitment phobic," so that his love could appear and disappear as necessary. I can't wait to hear what the other judges have to say.
Lazzmaniandevil 03-16-07, 09:00 PM	Wow, great job with those comments Zherog! I did not expect such precise comments and suggestions. I'm pretty much in agreement with everything you said, except for one small detail... Math Stuff Level-6 ... imbued (vigor) summon monster V (1d3 celestial lions; CL 14th) OR summon monster VI (Bralani; CL 14th) I don’t think you’re actually prepping a summon monster V in this slot, but instead prepping SM6 and using it to summon extra critters from 5’s list, correct? Actually, I was using a summon monster V to summon extra critters from SM4’s list. The spell uses a 6th level slot because of the metamagic feat imbued summoning, which states that an imbued summoning spell uses up a spell slot one level higher than the spell’s actual level. Sorry if that wasn't clear!
Far_Traveler 03-16-07, 09:07 PM	Math Stuff This is a lot more than what I’m computing for your character. I get 40. You have 4 at first level, 2.5 each additional level (for a total of 26.5), and +10 from your Con. 4+26+10=40.I’m not sure where the other 12 are coming from. Odd, while I am still incorrect, your gave me an additional 4hp, 2.5x9 is 22.5, +4 to 26.5, +10 to 36.5, and DANGIT! As a nit pick, you get the bonus to any save if the spell is an enchantment. While the grand majority of enchantment spells do allow Will saves, I wouldn’t be surprised to find one somewhere that allowed either a Fort or Reflex save. So it is. poop. Another nit pick; you’re immune to any magical sleep effect, not just the sleep spell. For example, you’re also immune to the spell deep slumber. Darn. Nope, not in my book. Wizards are common, and enchantment spells are a normal tool of wizards. Well, it seemed like a good idea at the time, and what I had as an argument I just realized would be easily torn apart. I’m always loathe to allow a new character access to this bonus (as well as the “fairness and generosity” bonus). In my opinion, both of those bonuses need to be earned through roleplay; they aren’t just something you decide your character has. Even with that aside, as far as the drow are concerned, your character is dead. So how would she have “great renown” among them?My bad, I'm beginning to think that ALL 3 of my readers were just bull******** me when they said they checked over it. It’s interesting you don’t have any of your skills maxed out. Your max ranks are 13. Was there a reason you went with 10 ranks in your skills instead of max on at least a few key skills (like Spellcraft or Concentration)? And, sort of related, you only spent 73 skill points; you have another 21 points you could spend. I need to go murder some people now. You gain a +2 bonus when using Spellcraft in conjunction with the enchantment school, and a -5 penalty when using it for either evocation or abjuration. It’s good to mention these things near where the skill is, because putting it elsewhere makes it easy to forget. Actually, i completely forgot about this. Damn. Also, you gain a +2 bonus to Spellcraft from a synergy with Knowledge (arcana).Dangit. You have other synergies not listed, too. Knowledge (local) gives you a +2 to Gather Information (for a total of +4 unskilled). You have a bunch of circumstantial bonuses to Survival (on planes, above ground).Also dang, that's the kind of thing I DO pay attention to. Not counting your bonus enchantment spell, your spells per day should be 4/6/6/5/5/3. A 10th level wizard has 4/4/4/3/3/2, and your Int mod gives you bonus spells of 0/2/2/2/2/1/1/1/1 (though the bonus slots for 6th through 8th level don’t do you any good yet). Incorrect. my int modifier for bonus spells is +6, not +8. My headband doesn't count. You also probably want to find a way to indicate which spells are enchantments, because of the bonus you get from your feats to the save DC. Good point. So I think I’ll have a discussion about this in the suggestion thread; you’re supposed to have any scroll or wondrous item at 75% of the cost, not just the ones you can craft. I originally proposed the rule based on how Dungeon magazine handles it; here’s why, using an example from your character. You could’ve found that cloak of resistance +3, or you could’ve made it. Obviously, it’s to your advantage here to say you made it – then it only costs you half the list price, especially since we don’t penalize XP. So, as a means to balance all that out, any item that comes under your Craft feats is at 75%. In some cases, you get a bargain, because you save 25% off the listed price (for example, if you had a scroll of wish). In other cases, you’re paying a little more (the cloak, for example). The thought is that it balances out (more or less) in the end, while still making those feats useful to you. Because it was probably unclear how this works (and why), I’m not going to “deduct points” for items where you had the wrong cost. And I’ll rewrite the clause of the rules for future coordinating judges to include. When I add up your items (using the values you have listed), I get a total value of 87949. That leaves you another 51 gold to spend. As always, being under is significantly better than being over. I’m not clear if this is one ring (with the abilities combined) or two rings. It’s written as though it’s one ring, but it’s priced as two rings. If you intended this to be one ring, the price would be 11,750 (start with the ring of protection, which costs 8000; add the ring of sustenance, which costs 2500; however, you need to increase the cost of the sustenance part by 50%).Should of been listed, but it is indeed two rings. So... you took the cloak of arachnida and moved the slot to the robe slot? Some DMs might have a problem with that, though I don’t see a problem since the robe slot is described as “various effects.” I put this into account, yes. :rofl: The spell is Mordenkainen’s lucubration. :pbbbtt: Quiet! I’m not sure how you get 20 baths out of this. One day’s worth of firewood weighs 20 pounds and costs 1 copper. So, based on both the weight and cost, you bought 5 of these. You take 4 baths per day? Actually I figured that I would only need 5lb. for a single bath. Where’d you get the cost for these?Estimates You have a magical cloak. Are you wearing both?I am, it IS meant to conceal That looks like 30 points to me. In order to get a 14 Charisma, you would need to buy a 16 since elans have a -2 penalty. That gives you ability costs of 10/2/4/2/2/10, which adds up to 30. While it should of been listed, the +2 on str was the levels, so I'm actually under :P I get +4 for your Fort. Soulknives have a base Fort save of +2, and you have a +1 Con mod. You also have a +1 cloak.hmmmm... I think that i got the charisma later, after doing some stat shifting. Is this a circlet of persuasion reslotted? If so, the cost should be multiplied by 1.5 for being in an uncustomary space (necklace is for protection and discernment). So the cost should actually be 6750. Hmmm... how to justify.... I got nothin. Well, let’s start off simple. What’s the “+1” for? That aside, I’m OK with the method you used for pricing. Taking a look at existing items that do similar things is the ideal way of pricing a new magic item. Another (not as good) way to price it would be to turn the darkvision spell into a continuous use item. You start with the formula of spell level (2) X caster level (3) X 2000, for a total of 12,000. If you want to reduce the distance down to 30 feet, that’s definitely worthy of a price reduction. How much? I don’t think half is reasonable – darkvision to 30’ is better than not having it all. Knocking off 40%, though, isn’t bad; that would drop the cost down to 7200. In the end, though, I’m personally OK with your 6K price. +1 was probably a holdover from when it was a ring of protection. Background Stuff So I’ll say right off the bat: I don’t like the “cohort is actually a hired merc to kill the master” sort of thing. In my opinion, it goes against the entire purpose of the Leadership feat – to have a completely loyal person tag around with you. I suppose, but it was the best idea I had for this contest, sometimes it hits me sometimes it doesn't. Dart was actually a holdover from my old idea for the abherration setting that was being tossed around. only instead of betraying Mendalyn, he hunts down the flayers by working for them. It’s made doubly worse in this contest. The whole concept is to weave your cohort (or whatever) into your story. And you haven’t really done that at all, in my mind. She has a cohort (who serves as a bodyguard), he follows her around, and that’s that. There’s no special treatment; there’s no cool backstory about the true cohort who has been replaced. The elan is just there, waiting to hear from his true master. In my mind, that doesn’t really fit what we wanted in this contest. The other problem I have with your background is the size of it. I don’t want (or expect) novels; but you’re ECL 12, and you did something to gain all that power. Tell me about it. Nothing about your background, really, prevents me from copy/pasting it and using it for a much lower level character. In fact, I think it’d be a fine character background for an ECL 3 drow enchanter. You need to provide more than “all the drow hate her and tried to kill her.”Well, to be fair she makes a better NPC because after all, how do the drow high wizards get so high level? Living in drow society. On the plus side, I enjoyed the spots where you let your sense of humor show through in the writing. What you provided was easy and fun to read – I just wish there was a little more to it.Heh. I especially like the touch with her father being killed by "a mysterious cult" and guess what Dart is a member of? Another plus: You hit the spider theme beautifully! You wove it into your outfit and jewelry and choice of magic items very well. She IS a Drow Other Stuff Interestingly, I’m working on an enchanter myself for a new game. I’m taking the character I posted back a while ago (Avesteri Leafstrider) and altering the character to fit the parameters of the game (I need to take away a level, alter stats, and lose some equipment). I find the enchantment school really fun – but also really frustrating, because so many things are immune or get rocking bonuses. Notes bolded, Normally I have a lot of small errors, now I just had a few big ones. I need to murder my pre-readers now, or at least hurt...
Zherog 03-16-07, 09:39 PM	Incorrect. my int modifier for bonus spells is +6, not +8. My headband doesn't count. Nope, you're incorrect. A headband of intellect increases everything related to Int except the number of skill points per level - that includes bonus spells. Do ability enhancing items (such as the headband of intellect, cloak of charisma, and periapt of wisdom) grant bonus spells to the appropriate spellcasters? The spells these items are based on would seem to prohibit it, but the only things specifically addressed in the item descriptions are skill points. Yes, you can get extra bonus spells if you have an item that increases the ability score that governs your spellcasting. To get the extra bonus spells, you must wear the item while resting to regain spells and all through your initial daily preparations for spellcasting. (Even characters who don’t prepare spells need to meditate a little while at the beginning of the day; see Daily Readying of spells under the Sorcerers and bards section of Chapter 10 in the Player’s Handbook.) If you lose the item, you immediately lose the bonus spell slots the item gave you, starting with any uncast spells you have of the appropriate levels.
edwardsobel 03-17-07, 09:59 AM	just a quick comment on Balrock comments The original creation for Balrock was a half ogre but alas the races of stone book was not allowed so I used full ogre (though I really wished half ogre was available) I didn't build the character for power it was an adventure in role playing. BTW the original Balrock was 2nd edition half oogre cleric of Thor but he changed to paladin in 3rd edition. I managed to win two awards and conventions for best roleplayer using Balrock many yaers ago. He does have the knack of dumbing down the entire table especiall his constatnt questioning of the player thiying to play the quiet rogue or mysterious warrior type. make for some hilarious moments at the table. especially when it doesnt interupt the flow of the game. so thanks for the comments. BTW any bonus points for never pushing the judges to get done?
jennibert 03-18-07, 08:44 PM	Well, I am the bad judge who was the last to get her scores in, so as soon as Z's got everything tabulated, results will be forthcoming. And I'll see about my comments as soon as I get the time to type things up--I did half on computer and half on paper, so it'll take me a little bit of time. But I must say, such a nice group of contestants! Very much a pleasure to judge, even if I did rush through some of the later ones...or, since I went in reverse order, earlier ones....(sorry guys!) That said, I'm off for now...will try to be better about comment posting than I was at judging....
Far_Traveler 03-18-07, 08:54 PM	Nope, you're incorrect. A headband of intellect increases everything related to Int except the number of skill points per level - that includes bonus spells. Dangit, normally I'm the one to point out ask wizards answers. Why oh why did I have to put my high horse so high?
Zherog 03-18-07, 09:00 PM	I'm currently in a game; once that wraps up, I'll tabulate the final scores and post the totals.
Zherog 03-19-07, 12:23 AM	I'd like to thank everybody for their patience. I'll be the first to admit we took too long to judge this one. I said previously I wasn't going to announce the names of any judges who failed to turn in scores - but I don't have to, because everybody got scores in to me! So without making you wait any further - the scores: Capturing the bronze medal, with an average score of 27.83, is The Freedom Defenders, by lazzmaniandevil Capturing the silver medal we have a tie, both with an average score of 28, are Healer Welford, by Haruspex and Balrock Gourd, by edwardsobel And finally, capturing the gold medal, with an average score of 29.17, is Araithor, son of Faraithor, The Cavalier Prince, by JasonOrlandoHawk! Congrats to all the winners! All the scores, in order of finish: Araithor, son of Faraithor, The Cavalier Prince, by JasonOrlandoHawk -- 29.17 Balrock Gourd, by edwardsobel -- 28 Healer Welford, by Haruspex -- 28 The Freedom Defenders, by lazzmaniandevil -- 27.83 Mikolos and Ferros, by wrecan -- 27.67 Don, Key Hotay of Lamancha, by Kit_the_Odd -- 26.67 Drakth'yar the Invincible, by Comus -- 26.67 Zeek, cat burglar, by Heros_Backpack -- 26.5 Sir Isaiah Heavenson, by AmericanYeti -- 23.5 Kaylee Devenshire and Loki, by DarkKitsune -- 22.67 Thibaude de Xinoe and Imychtazid, by Orchomenos -- 21.33 Mendalyn Ent'Sur the Betrayed, by Far_Traveler -- 21 Again, thanks to everybody who entered and gave some wonderful material to look over. These stories were really all quite good. And thanks for your patience!
JasonOrlandoHawk 03-19-07, 10:01 AM	:mymy: To be totally honest, I thought I'd grab a medal, but I thought I'd come in 3rd... I didn't expect the Gold! :w00t: :dancin: :w00t: Anyways, my compliments all around. It seems like every competition, the average scores move higher. edwardsobel, Haruspex, and lazzmaniandevil, excellent entries. You definitely gave me a run for my money. Great job guys. :clap: In fact, great job to everyone. wrecan almost took a medal with his first entry. I got to see "Don, Key Hotay of Lamancha" as a contestant. :rofl: I even got to see a Drow, which I think may be a HC 1st. Anyways, long story short, all of the entries were very high quality. Great job. :clap: Finally, to the judges... :clap: :bow: :clap: :bow: :clap: Hey, I remember Year of the Dragons, and I know what you went through to successfully judge this competition. It may have taken a while, but this contest wouldn't have been possible without you volunteering your time to it. Thank you. Take a bow! Only one request remains, as far as I'm concerned. I would like to see comments from the other judges, when you get time. Thanks again everyone! Maybe we can break the entry record for my next round as coordinator, in HC#8.
Mercurius 03-19-07, 10:23 AM	I'll see about posting my comments tonight. I'll readily admit that mine aren't as thorough and concise as Zherog's... I mostly tabulated my impressions about the score at the end of each entry. Nevertheless, it'll help people understand how exactly they were judged by me, I suppose.
wrecan 03-19-07, 12:06 PM	I'm happy for my first foray!
Comus 03-19-07, 02:14 PM	Congrats, guys - even if you didn't get in the top three, there were a lot of good entries here. Heck, most were within three points of the winner! Close race, and an exciting one... even with the judging delays. :P
Zherog 03-19-07, 03:11 PM	Close race I thought so too, so I went and checked. The top score in this contest was 29.17, and the lowest score was 21 - for a separation of 8.17 points. I went and checked the other contests (except for HC1). Here's some numbers: Contest High Low Difference HC2 28.3 21.3 7.0* HC3 27.375 18.75 8.625 HC4 29.125 19.625 9.5 HC5 26.33 19.81 6.52 HC6 26.625 18 8.625 HC7 29.17 21 8.17 HC2 has an asterisk, because there were only four entries for the entire contest. So some observations: This contest received the highest score ever. Entries as low as 8th place in this contest (26.5) would've won previous contests The low score of 21 is the second-highest low score ever, with the highest being achieved in HC2 when there was only 4 entries The difference between high and low is the third lowest, behind HC5 and HC2. Overall, this batch of characters was really, really good. I'll go through later and determine the "Best of" categories. In fact, I'll go do that now - it's better than doing work. :D
Orchomenos 03-19-07, 03:18 PM	Congratulations to the winners! Other Stuff I can’t speak for other judges, but I really like when contestants break down how they got certain numbers on their character sheets. You didn’t give me anything, which makes it harder to back into your numbers – and also makes mistakes cost you a bit more. It also really hurts your clarity score – for example, I can’t tell if you took paladin or knight at first level. Well, I spent much time calculating everything, and I was sure I included these numbers in my entry. Anyway... I wanted to create a character with an Intelligent item in some contest, and it looked like the ideal one. However, my background went wrong, and in the end, I wasn't sure which one was the main character, and which one was the side-kick... :( Well, better luck next time!
Lazzmaniandevil 03-19-07, 03:19 PM	Bronze medal! Cool! Pretty good for my first entry... Congrats' to all the other particpants and a big thanks to the judges.
Zherog 03-19-07, 03:29 PM	And here's the "Best in Category" awards. Here's how I did it (which is a bit different from how other judges have done it in the past). I went through all the scores, and determined which entry received the highest mark in each category from each judge. If a judge had multiple entries with their high score, each got a "vote." The entries with the most "votes" gets the award; anybody listed as an "Honorable Mention" had at least one "vote" in the category, but not enough to "win." Best in Class: Thematic Creativity: Zeek, cat burglar, by Heros_Backpack Honorable Mentions: Araithor, son of Faraithor, The Cavalier Prince, by JasonOrlandoHawk; Healer Welford, by Haruspex; Mikolos and Ferros, by wrecan;Thibaude de Xinoe and Imychtazid, by Orchomenos; Drakth'yar the Invincible, by Comus Best in Class: Background: Araithor, son of Faraithor, The Cavalier Prince, by JasonOrlandoHawk Honorable Mentions: Healer Welford, by Haruspex; The Freedom Defenders, by lazzmaniandevil; Balrock Gourd, by edwardsobel; Don, Key Hotay of Lamancha, by Kit_the_Odd; Zeek, cat burglar, by Heros_Backpack; Drakth'yar the Invincible, by Comus Best in Class: Rules Use: Balrock Gourd, by edwardsobel Honorable Mention: The Freedom Defenders, by lazzmaniandevil Best in Class: Clarity: The Freedom Defenders, by lazzmaniandevil; Don, Key Hotay of Lamancha, by Kit_the_Odd; Araithor, son of Faraithor, The Cavalier Prince, by JasonOrlandoHawk (three way tie) Cheers! :pint:
Zherog 03-19-07, 03:32 PM	I wanted to create a character with an Intelligent item in some contest, and it looked like the ideal one. However, my background went wrong, and in the end, I wasn't sure which one was the main character, and which one was the side-kick... :( You made an awesome character with an interesting backstory. Don't knock yourself too hard. :) I think your character (and, really, every character in this contest) would be fun to have in a group.
Far_Traveler 03-19-07, 05:31 PM	Last place again... Ah well. Really, Mendalyn was well-ish made, the mechanics being a problem in many cases, nad now that I think about it, the concept wasn't that great to begin with. I'm a lot better at designing npcs then pcs, and this is what it seems to be. But still, First drow? Neat. What's not neat is that I'm just now thinking of some elements that could clarify some things with mendalyn. Namely, her strange empathy aiding in her enchantment ability, some cleanup, getting someone to edit it that actually would do it and now just say they did, etc. Ah well. next time.
Zherog 03-19-07, 07:06 PM	Again, don't knock yourself over your place. She was a fine character, all told. She maybe wasn't the best fit for the category, but that doesn't make her a bad character. Like I said to Orcho - I think any of the characters posted in this contest would make fine additions to any adventuring group.
FRRC 03-19-07, 07:18 PM	Although I didn't enter this competition (Or the previous one, infact), I have to say that this sudden usage of the new Monster stat layout totally blew my mind. I think it's a really bad template for PC stats - its just clunky and messy. The best sheets are the ones that make sense. :/
DarkKitsune 03-19-07, 09:20 PM	Feh... I'd love to be surprised and outraged, but I realized Kaylee wasn't my greatest character shortly after she was posted (too late to do anything about it, of course :p). Most of the mistakes were, I admit, the result of rushing the mechanics (I think it was, like, 2-3 hours background, 15-30 minutes mechanics), so a lot of mistakes slipped through unintentionally. Otherwise, the Sor 5 was from memorizing the rule of thumb, but not the exception to the rule, which figures :p. Combat Casting was a newbie mistake, I'll be honest. It does look tasty of paper, even if it doesn't live up to the promises in real life. (Although, really, I'd love to see the whole feat section redone. I feel it's the weakest part of the character.) As for the background, what you find is the gulf between my literary preferences (average, low-power characters), and the contest's level. With a few exceptions, I have difficulty coming up with a background befitting a character who can take on armies of orcs, simply because I don't find them stimulating in that manner (don't get me wrong; they're fun to play, in the right setting, just dull to write about :p). Finally, the fortune-telling bit. I had reasoned that fortune-telling for her was mostly a matter of Bluff, Diplomacy, and a pre-cast detect thoughts (both this and scrying were there because of her trade), the trade being more a matter of applied knowledge than actually seeing the future. The concept of Profession (fortune telling) never occurred to me.
Far_Traveler 03-19-07, 09:32 PM	I know, I know, but I just really want to be a judge, but I have to win a contest to do that. We shall see what hits me next contest.
Haruspex 03-19-07, 11:11 PM	So near yet so far. I just have to quadruple-check for maths and rules errors next time. Congrats to everyone who got a medal, especially to the gold medalist JasonOrlandoHawk. It seems that the overall quality of entries has improved; that means everyone deserves congratulations!:D
AmericanYeti 03-22-07, 08:08 PM	First off, thank you for taking the time to judge these contests. It improves my writing skills so much, and I want you to know that we appreciate what you guys do. Now, to the responses. I know that LA's generally reduce suvivability. I just love the idea of a winged knight charging through the ranks of demons and orcs with a magic sword. Such a good image. So I picked what I thought was a cool concept over what was most mechanically powerful. But now that you mention it, I would kind of be a hindrance to a party, wouldn't I? As to your comment about the shield, a heavy steel shield is only +2 but all mithral items are mastercrafted, right? So it would be +3. Or am I totally off? The gold thing was just a stupid mistake. Most of the time I was writing this was at one in the morning, so you'll have to forgive my math. Also, you're right. The warhorse is wearing a breastplate. I'm just used to Warhammer (been playing a lot lately) where barding is barding. Sorry about the lack of white space in the background. I don't know what happened. It was there in Word, but that didn't transfer, I guess. For the improbability, I didn't really think about game mechanics there. I was thinking all about the way the story would work. It's kind of hard to fall in love with someone when all they have to do is say "Here's 100 gp, go to the chapel." Finally, thank you for your kind words about my background. I don't like how I write at all, and I'm just trying to hammer out a style.
Mercurius 03-22-07, 09:39 PM	Actually, master crafted armor reduces the Armor check penalty by one, it doesn't increase the bonuses. That's the result of magical enhancements, such as a +1 heavy shield... I still need to start on my comments. I'll see what I can get up tonight and tomorrow morning.
AmericanYeti 03-22-07, 09:53 PM	Oh. Okay. In that case, my Defense is too high. Crud.
Mercurius 03-22-07, 10:29 PM	First, let me say a few general comments: When it came to background, I had two things that were really important on my list: Did your character earn his/her levels and did your character seem likely to have survived through a rigorous 12 levels of adventuring. There were several entries that didn't really seem to me to warrant being anywhere near twelfth level, so I did count off for that because if you're building a higher level character, you should be able to justify it. Second, contrary to Zherog, I don't think that magical item creation feats should net you a discount on items you couldn't actually craft. As this was not clarified, I judged it my way, which meant that, if you weren't capable of casting a spell that was a prereq for an item, I counted against you if you discounted it. I was a lot less thorough in my comments than I know Zherog often is, so I'll just reprint them here. They're more opinions and such, rather than full fledged disertations, though I'll point out particularly sticky areas. I like description, but I didn't really look for it this time (because I didn't think to). However, several characters seemed to have traits that shouldn't make them so easily mistaken for someone else... A satyr's goat-like legs bend in a way that wouldn't really look like an normal person in pants, and kobolds, with their snouts and tails, probably aren't often mistaken for humans or halflings. No big, but you should probably consider that sort of thing rather than striving for a "big reveal." Thematic Creativity: Paladin mount is a pretty straightforward way to get a sidekick. A mount that is both too small for the character and the character thinks is the raised animal companion of a druid adventuring buddy is golden. I very much enjoyed this angle. Background: Ogre Paladin wins points in my book just because it's very unusual and it's an uphill battle, mechanics wise. It's a bit difficult and ponderous to read your backstory – the dialogue, though logical for a character of his educational level, is a chore to poor through, and the frequent interjections to explain things to the reader could have been moved to footnotes if they were really needed at all. It's an interesting enough background, and you justify your levels well enough, especially since you don't even need to cover as many. Rules: It looks like your gold total is off a bit, but not by too much (16.46 gp, by my count) and that's an easy enough mistake. You've got loose gold enough to cover the difference. Clarity: Everything is readable, except maybe for the background. Thanks for the stat breakdowns. Thematic Creativity: Lots of followers – this guy is surrounded by friends. In addition, he is staunchly opposed to slavery and imprisonment. I imagine one could throw him for a loop by arguing that summoned monsters are under a form of enslavement. Very interesting idea, though. Sidekicks fighting against injustice. Background: Seeing slavery and oppression firsthand, and being liberated by fellows who were very much like him is a very compelling origin. This character is justified in his actions and beliefs. Campaigning via infiltration is also very cool. Also, kudos on being middle-aged. It helps justify your high level to me. Rules: Almost everything is perfect. You own no clothes, and you have two spells you need a material component to cast (but no material component pouch) and one spell prepared that you are technically prohibited from casting (Deathwatch, nonsensically I'll admit, has the [Evil] descriptor, so a good aligned cleric cannot cast it). Very good number crunching, though I believe Benito's skill ranks are off, mostly due to the wonky way to determine class skills. Clarity: Thanks for the skill and stat breakdowns. I would have appreciated it for Benito as well, but I wasn't judging sidekicks quite as closely. You gave me pretty much everything I needed. Good job. Thematic Creativity: Good use of followers (profession: masseuse is great!), inclusion of familiar and cohort, and you managed to provide a few interesting RP possibilities with Dart, though his lack of loyalty seems odd for a cohort. I think the best explanation is that Dart, while sent to kill Mendalyn, has become a loyal cohort, despite his worst intentions to the contrary. He probably doesn't even realize it yet, but he might find himself one day protecting her from his own masters. That's the best way I can find to justify his background and cohort status, and it seems kinda cool. Sadly, it's all extrapolation rather than subtext. Background: Nothing terrible, but nothing terribly inspiring. Dart has a slightly more interesting background, but Mendalyn had to have gained those 10 levels somewhere. Not even much evidence of her soft-heartedness. I do like that she dies her familiar's paws red to make it seem more dangerous than it really is. Rules Use: Major skill point errors – I count only 73 points spent. It looks like you forgot to account for the three levels with your higher INT, or maybe the increased skill points at first level... not sure. Spellbook contents aren't addressed, which is a major factor for wizards. Your typical spells prepared list has more spells on it than you could have gained by level additions alone, but you didn't pay for any additional spells. Your gold is off by a lot, considering you'd have to have paid for spells for your spellbook/scrolls/hireling spellcasters to make many of the items you got a discount on (as you don't have spells like Fox's Cunning in your apparent spellbook, and you can't even cast the requisite spells for a cloak of resistance due to your prohibited school of Abjuration). Clarity: Decent breakdown, but no spellbook is damning here. Denoting which items are hand-crafted and breaking up ring and scroll entries would have been nice, too. You should probably have indicated when you were swapping slots around on magic items as well. Thematic Creativity: A Thrallherd masquerading as a wizard's familiar is brilliant and well done. A genius idea. Using your believers as fences is a good idea, too. Background: A very fun read, with excellent info. Sadly, there's little to indicate that Zeek has really earned his 12 levels, though, of course, things are more threatening to a cat, so one could probably justify it, and lord knows there was necessity. He can fit in well with a party, too. Especially one who can deal with his eccentricities. That must have been one idiot druid, though, because Baleful Polymorph is permanent, so expecting it to wear off was just daft ;) Rules Use: My main complaint: Psion is a class, but you MUST select your discipline, which colors everything you are capable of as a Psion. I'd say it's reasonably obvious that you picked Telepath based on skills and powers known, but you really need to note it. Disciplines aren't like a wizard's specialization. They're mandatory, not optional. There's an issue with your skill points – judging by your level breakdown, you never spent 5 of them (at your first and second levels). Very good job buying stats. One could have just bought mental stats, but you went ahead and bought your physical ones too. You should have trap sense at +2. Clarity: Level breakdown is pretty clear, and your stat breakdowns are hand too. Well done. Noting when you got bonus feats would have been nice. Thematic Creativity: I'm not entirely positive that a rust monster is in the rules this way – Train DCs are a notoriously difficult thing to realistically handle, especially with the difficulty and time required, etc. However, it looks like you could have probably made it, and it's very novel. Good job. Background: This guy's sidekick is very well worked in, conceptually and plot-wise. You've got a good amount of character here, though your satyr is remarkably chaste. Tactics are appreciated and he could be worked into a party rather well. He lacks any real NPC ties, so there's not much for me to work with as a DM. Rules Use: You miscalculated your Will save, and I count about 812 extra gold to spend, but there's no accounting for it. I'm not sure why you prioritized Charisma except for your handle animal skill. Since the standard Rust Monster's hit dice are 5, the training DC should have been 25 for rearing it, something you could have made by taking 10, unlike the quoted DC 32, which would have been pretty much beyond you without rolling really high. You've got some nice touches here, too: iron bars for food, a rust colored bag of tricks, etc. Zherog's right that you probably should have to account for the value of Ferros somewhere, but that's really hard to adjudicate. Clarity: Your stat blocks aren't the absolute easiest to read, but the breakdowns throughout are a huge help. I'd prefer items, skills, etc in list form as it makes it easier to keep track of everything. Thematic Creativity: You've got a cohort and followers, but they seem kinda tacked on. With the Dread Pirate Roberts thing, it helps to have a loyal cohort, and it's explained well enough, but they don't play much of a part in your story. Background: Good DPR usage – it's kinda fun for a character. Your take on kobolds seems to be different from standard ones (who are commonly highly insular and lawful evil from what I've seen), so some mention/explanation of this might have been nice, but it's still a good background. I like the personality, too. The ongoing villain and other plot hooks help, too. Rules Use: Major issues with gold. The armor goes over the maximum value available, but I've made that mistake, too. In the future, I think we should make that more clear. By my count, your total gold is actually under the limit, so you could have actually afforded a higher AC if you'd wanted. I like that you, unlike some martial characters in this contest, have good attack mods. Why you have ranks in Trapfinding, though, I can't tell. Good catch, however, on actually needing to purchase Common. Clarity: AC, stat breakdowns are great. I can find almost everything well. You fail to note languages known, but so do many people. It's reasonably easy to figure out. That's it for now. More tomorrow, possibly. I'm tired of fighting this keyboard for the moment.
Far_Traveler 03-22-07, 10:47 PM	Thematic Creativity: Good use of followers (profession: masseuse is great!), inclusion of familiar and cohort, and you managed to provide a few interesting RP possibilities with Dart, though his lack of loyalty seems odd for a cohort. I think the best explanation is that Dart, while sent to kill Mendalyn, has become a loyal cohort, despite his worst intentions to the contrary. He probably doesn't even realize it yet, but he might find himself one day protecting her from his own masters. That's the best way I can find to justify his background and cohort status, and it seems kinda cool. Sadly, it's all extrapolation rather than subtext. Background: Nothing terrible, but nothing terribly inspiring. Dart has a slightly more interesting background, but Mendalyn had to have gained those 10 levels somewhere. Not even much evidence of her soft-heartedness. I do like that she dies her familiar's paws red to make it seem more dangerous than it really is. Rules Use: Major skill point errors – I count only 73 points spent. It looks like you forgot to account for the three levels with your higher INT, or maybe the increased skill points at first level... not sure. Spellbook contents aren't addressed, which is a major factor for wizards. Your typical spells prepared list has more spells on it than you could have gained by level additions alone, but you didn't pay for any additional spells. Your gold is off by a lot, considering you'd have to have paid for spells for your spellbook/scrolls/hireling spellcasters to make many of the items you got a discount on (as you don't have spells like Fox's Cunning in your apparent spellbook, and you can't even cast the requisite spells for a cloak of resistance due to your prohibited school of Abjuration). Clarity: Decent breakdown, but no spellbook is damning here. Denoting which items are hand-crafted and breaking up ring and scroll entries would have been nice, too. You should probably have indicated when you were swapping slots around on magic items as well. Actually, about Dart, that's exactly what I was going for. He was around for longer then Mendalyn had that Leadership feat. The skill points, it was the bonus skill points for first level (really stupid thing there), and spellbook... I really have nothing to say about that. The paws... Yeah, I went crazy on the luxury.
Zherog 03-23-07, 11:16 AM	Second, contrary to Zherog, I don't think that magical item creation feats should net you a discount on items you couldn't actually craft. As this was not clarified, I judged it my way, which meant that, if you weren't capable of casting a spell that was a prereq for an item, I counted against you if you discounted it. Thanks for reminding me. Note to self: Clarify the way this section of the rules is worded before the next contest.
jennibert 03-23-07, 07:03 PM	Congrats to everyone! Sorry this wasn't sooner--been a bit under the weather this week, so sitting down and typing up my comments and what not has been a bit of an underwhelming prospect. But I do apologize for not commenting on the overall excellent quality of the entries. They were a lot of fun to judge, and I look forward to seeing more of everyone's work in the next competition! (Because even when I don't judge, as I won't be, I always read the entries....) So, anyway, comments forthcoming. And keep up the good work!:D
jennibert 03-23-07, 07:18 PM	A couple of preliminary notes on my judging: Thematic Creativity: First, I looked for how you did it. Leadership was expected, so less likely to get high marks without something a bit more. I also looked for interesting--was your concept engaging? Background: Here, I really looked for interest. I want to see characters with interesting lives. Also, I looked for enough adventure to justify 12th level, and for allies and enemies, so that the DM has something to work with. And I looked for willingness to join the party, and feasibility of playing well with others afterwards. I also like to see description, and tactics, and the little things that flesh out characters in stats. Rules Use: Math. Did you qualify for your prestige class? Did you add your BAB and saves and ability points and everything else correctly? Did you list your class abilities correctly? Clarity: WHITE SPACE. For the love of all that is holy, please give me white space! I really HATE that monster stat block (though I didn't count off for it unless it was very difficult to read). And I dislike backing into abilities and skills (particularly the latter...). I look for ease of reading, and ease of locating the things I need to see. This goes for the background as well as the stats, though the latter less so. And now for individual comments....in reverse order, just to be perverse;)
jennibert 03-23-07, 07:49 PM	Theme A bard with leadership is fairly standard. (In fact, my first D&D character ever was just that….) But I do like the addition of the intelligent weapon (does he have a large nose?). Though, I must say, I would have added a coterie of servants and what not following him along because he’s more interesting to serve, or something like that. Just to have something to do with the followers he should’ve probably amassed. Background “I am I Don Key Hotay, the Lord of La Mancha My destiny calls and I go And the wild winds of fortune shall carry me onward Whither so ever they blow….” Okay, I got a kick out of your background. Especially sending him into the seeker of the song prestige class. That’s just…I can’t even think of a word that appropriate enough. In fact, I got such amusement out of your entry that I felt compelled to judge it first just so I could include that song snippet. Now, that said…some things to note: Not a whole lot of justification for him as a bard. I like the idea, but I had to look at his stats to figure out what his class was. Would have been nice to have some actual enemies and not just general enmity. Surely Don’s got some lord he’s annoyed or some evil-doer he’s put away or something like that… And you forgot Dulcinea, but I won’t deduct points for that. Or for the fact that Rocinante is no warhorse ;). Don would be a fun person to have in a party. Rules A couple of additions to Zherog's comments: Don's Whirling Blade spell requires a slashing weapon as a focus. A rapier is a piercing weapon, and he'd be ill-advised to throw his only weapon anyway. He cannot cast this spell. Someone (possibly you?) did this in a previous competition as well, but I think I didn’t post my comments for that one. Sorry, but you still should’ve checked on it. Would have been nice to see his to hit modifier with touch and ranged touch attacks, since he owns wands that give him each. Glad to see he has plenty of practical items. But he should probably own a shortbow, seeing as how you’ve given him a to hit modifier for one. Clarity Reasonably clear, though a reference for the Seeker of the Song prestige class would have helped very much. Also, the level chart was nice, but hard to read. Theme I like the use of the knight with followers. It’s a cool class, and I’m glad someone made use of the PHBII since we allowed it:). That said, I didn’t feel a whole lot of explanation of his cohort followers. “I met Lordok and we hit it off” and “They volunteered their services for me” are all well and good for leadership explanation in any other Hero Craftsmen, but I would have liked to see some more development of his secondary characters. Background Has good things—allies, defined enemy and general enemies, and some interesting background strife. But he’s written for a very specific situation—it’d be hard to fit Isaiah into any group that doesn’t happen to be fighting in his predefined area. I imagine he’ll be pretty single-minded about it. That said, I like Isaiah as a character. Strong-willed and determined, with a nice history. And I’m a sucker for a first person perspective background, even if only partial:) Rules Natural Armor does not count for touch AC. Armor Mastery (Heavy) comes with the 9th level of knight, but you listed him as having it. On you skills, you listed some of the modifiers wrong. He’s only getting a +4 instead of a +6 to his Diplomacy, and a +5 to his Intimidate, again instead of +6—which looks like you added strength instead of charisma there. What kind of barding? Clarity Would have been nice to see more white space in the background. Long paragraphs without space between them makes it kinda hard to read. Please separate race ability bonuses from more the one race—easier to figure out. Also, listing the abilities by name instead of simply as “ability” would be nice. Theme I love the ogre paladin with the donkey mount. (Not that he can ride Done Kee, actually…sort of over large for that…) Good concept and a great way of presenting it. I mean, I expected to see a paladin with a special mount, but you have a rather unique way of presenting the concept. Well done. Background I love the form—Balrock in his own words is great! And the background is also interesting. He’s got some nice allies (Toomass and other paladins, Drew Id), and some possible enemies, though none named. Even a nice goal, and amorphous enough to fit in well with any adventuring party. I liked that the items were listed as he saw them. Nice touch. One suggestion: I would have stuck all of the “outside notes” at the end. Putting them in the middle broke up the flow and detracted from the story’s charm. Rules The only real error I can find is that you seem to have spent a little too much gold. I added it up about 16 over or so. That and you listed your hit points as being 4d8 and 5d10, when it should be 6. But you figured it correctly, so it’s just a minor thing…. The advantages of a low INT character…hard to screw up the skill points:). Clarity Fairly clear, though slight overuse of sblocks. Well expanded, though—showed everything as necessary. Good job. Theme A former slave and his celestial Pegasus cohort. Interesting, interesting. I like the background that Benito was his planar ally until he gained a celestial cohort. Gives them more background together. Background Fiero’s background is interesting, but kinda expected. Misses out on some useful things. Benito is his only ally, and no enemies to speak of—other than slavery in general. He strikes me as a character who might not fit well with a party—too committed to his own agenda. And, honestly, he hasn’t done anything of note. He escaped from slavers and now free slaves. I like that he's middle aged, though--at least he's old enough to justify the level:) And, I must say, very thorough of you to include the summoned monsters. Something a DM would surely appreciate…even if it does give me more to judge…Also including looks and tactics was very, very nice. Rules Fiero cannot cast deathwatch. It has an evil descriptor and he’s good aligned. Stupid, in my opinion--seems like a good cleric would benefit from knowing how close his allies are to dying so he knows what cure spell to hit them with--but still the rules. Also….you remembered the material component for shield other. Good job. However, he does not own a spell component pouch. And at least one of his spells (shield of faith) requires a material component. (There may be others, but I didn’t look further, as I only needed a single example to prove my point.) (I know someone else mentioned this....but it's one of my favorite things to point out.) JasonOrlandoHawk isn’t judging, so I feel obliged to point out: Apparently Fiero considers clothes a sign of oppression, as he owns none;). Clarity White space….please give me white space…Well, not quite as bad as my initial thought. It seems my transfer to Word removed your bolding, which would have made your entry easier to read, but is not your faultJ. But still, your entry would have benefited from white space. Also…expanding things in the initial entry would have been nice. I’d already backed out of your ability scores and saves before I noticed that you’d done that below. And you didn’t do so with Benito’s abilities….or skills…or anything else… Theme So, her actual sidekick was not terribly well-developed…but the importance of him is fabulous! What a concept! I am highly amused by the Dread Paladin Kobold idea you’ve got there. (Okay, I saw she’s not a paladin….but she has the mindset of one!) What a wonderful twist to the leadership feat that I’ve seen so much of in this competition! Way to go! Background As I already said….I love her concept. And her background is short and sweet—you made it clear that being the shieldbearer of Drakth’yar is enough to get anyone to high levels, and though a description of one such battle would have satisfied my literary curiosity, the background suffers not at all from the lack. I wouldn’t have minded more on the hobgoblin chieftain, and it would be nice if there were a anti-Drakth’yar blackguard type kobold who had it in for her, but all in all a very nice background. Rules Ah, a fighter….so many fewer special abilities to deal with…. I think you should have a +16 on your javelin. +12 BAB +2 DEX +1 Magic +1 Size. I’m pretty sure you could’ve spent more gold, but better to underspend than overspend. Clarity You made me rely on my memory/guess at which books which feats were in:P That’s gonna count against you. Also, you didn’t tell me how much your magic items were. Granted, I knew all but two or three off the top of my head (I’m such a nerd!), but still. Other than that, reasonably clear, though not exceptionally so. Theme Very interesting. The principal and sidekick switching places is a very interesting concept. For I would have to say that in the past Thibaude was Imychtazid’s sidekick, but now it is almost the reverse, as he’s dependent on her for mobility and whatnot. A very interesting concept. I like. Addendum: The more I read Imychtazid’s crunch, the better I like him. A fabulous concept! Adding a point on:). Background A very interesting history of Imychtazid, but it would have been nice to know more of Thibaude. Who are her personal friends/enemies? What specifically had she done to become so respected? Does Imychtazid have specific enemies from which he had protected the population? (Cause those would be cool.) Maybe some specific leaders now in Xinoe? I like that you mention she’s been his herald for some time—gives credence to her being at 12th levelJ. All in all a very solid background. Rules Here's where your character suffered a little. In addition to the skill and money issues noted by Zherog, I have the following: I have to ask…so Thibaude’s naked under her full plate? And wears it except to sleep, which she does outside (as she’s no money to pay for an inn), with no tent or sleeping bag, in the nude? (Just my friendly way of suggesting that she should have nonmagical gear…) Oh, and a holy symbol—I’m pretty sure she can’t turn undead without one. And maybe a horse, since she has all those ranks in ride… She has one too many bonus feats. A sixth level knight got Mounted Combat at 2nd, and another bonus at 5th. But she’s got Diehard listed as a bonus too… Clarity White space is your friend. More importantly, white space is MY friend, and I’m judging you. I really don’t mind how long it may look, just give me some space! Also, citations of books and breakdowns of skills and stats would be most useful. I get cranky when I have to back out of skills and remember what ability score and/or synergy bonuses apply to each. Okay, there's the first half. The rest'll take a wee bit longer, as I haven't got them already typed up. So I'll just leave The Two Towers running in the background and get to doing that then....seems an appropriate background....
jennibert 03-23-07, 09:11 PM	Theme I find it interesting that her cohort was originally sent to kill her. A very different choice, and while I’m not one hundred percent sure of it, I can’t deny the creativity thereof. But he wasn’t really very well developed except in his own background. (Which I liked…he sounds fairly interesting….) Background I particularly liked the trappings of her wealth included in her possessions and as her followers. Very well thought out gear. Which, in her case, if definitely considered backgroundJ. Having said that….I have trouble buying that she’s 12th level. She hasn’t done anything other than manage not to get killed with the rest of her family. Rules Your skill and leadership score issues have been addresses. I’ll also second that you should have paid for some of her typically prepared spells, since they’re greater in number than she should have gotten for free from level. But nothing else to add. Clarity Thank you for the white space! You expanded well, and listed everything neatly. Well done. Theme I love your concept. One of the most unique in the competition—using Handle Animal to obtain a rust monster mount! What a great concept! And plenty of nice description to go with it….I love his themed gear! Background I like the background. Enough to justify his level, but not excessive. Lacks some allies and enemies, but does include the excellent descriptions of their looks, and personalities, and tactics. I like his reasoning for looking for the rust monster, also—and that he still bears the scar. Very much fun….I would enjoy being in a party with them…thought I’d want to play a spellcaster or maybe a quarterstaff wielder;). Rules Use I took the time to look up the satyr in the SRD as well as in the Monster Manual to make sure that your mistakes with it were not misprints, but alas. Hit die, BAB, racial bonuses to skills, etc. only counted against you once if they caused other problems further down… I got very confused by your using head butt as the primary weapon. It took me some time to figure out that you’d put that –5 on the greatclub. And I still can’t figure out why you wouldn’t list it at the full….surely he doesn’t head butt all the time! Clarity Reasonably clear, though could still benefit from WHITE SPACE! Theme Leadership again, but in a good way. I like the healer cleric with his coterie, and the paladin he convinced of the benefit of his way. I am quite fond of Sir Cassius Bastion as a concept also, actually. Background I like his background. Starts off slightly typical (village attackd by [insert monster here]), but then takes a very different turn. I like where you’ve gone with him from there. I like that he sometimes does get into battles even when his purpose is healing. He has some very nice allies, and also an excellent enemy in the Scowling Prince. (Cause of course he’s not dead…or at the least, if he is, he’s undead;)). Well done and interesting background. Rules He doesn’t carry much in adventuring gear. Surely that would benefit him and his little entourage… Bastion is 10th level. He only gets 2 stat boosts, not 3. I’d list Survival as a skill…since Self-Sufficient gives a bonus to it. Clarity Neat and well organized, but please, give me white space! Though I do appreciate the level chart—very easy to read. Theme I knew I’d see a paladin with a special mount, but I love Whitewind. Such a great way of doing it—giving personality and spunk to what is an otherwise normal horse (okay, celestially summoned normal horse, but you get my point). And I like that he is an integral part of Araithor’s background even before he could summon a mount:) Background Wonderful. I love the letter format—really makes it stand out. And I do love the banter between Araithor and his lady. Very nice. You also managed to include nice allies and enemies. My only complaint is that you’ve kind of boxed him in, at least initially—he’s stuck at Lady Ganduwyn’s….or the story could just pick up later, but still. Also, I love that he owns a home and carries the keys for it! Perfect for a nobleman. And I did notice your bottles of fine wine:). Rules Use I spotted only 3 errors in your character. A minor underspending of gold, an error on your base reflex save…and the fact that he doesn’t, technically, qualify for the cavalier prestige class. It requires 4 ranks in Knowledge(Nobility and Royalty)…Araithor has only 3. Clarity Bless you and your white space. And your citing. And your careful listing of everything. Theme Your character is a cat! Masquarading as a wizard’s familiar! That is so incredibly hilarious and inspired that I just can’t get over my amazement. Very well done. Definitely a unique and interesting take on the theme. Background A very interesting, if short background. I’ll agree that he could have used a bit more in the way of adventures for his level, but still fairly well done. And I love his description…you get very few characters who stand 14” tall! Could stand a few more enemies, but quite well done. Good use of his thrall and believers. And maybe the druid was drunk so he accidentally cast baleful polymorph instead of reular polymorph? Rules He needs a discipline of Psion. And I think he’s missing some skill points in his early levels. And what the others said in addition as well. (I’m getting tired of typing…and they noticed everything I did and more….) Clarity Hooray for white space! And for breaking down your stats, skills, etc.! Way to go! Theme Kaylee and Loki are very interesting. I like the character, and her use of her familiar is very interesting. Well done. Background As I said, I like Kaylee. She has a very interesting concept. But I don’t get the feeling she should be 12th level…doesn’t have enough experience. And I would have liked to see more development of some of the oher characters…namely Lady Tanya, and possibly her father. I like the inclusion of personality and description. And the description of her clothing in her stat block is quite nice also. Rules Use I noticed a number of things, which Zherog has already commented on and Mercurius probably will as well, but the one glaring error is the failure to qualify for her prestige class. That’s most of what cost you. Clarity You can really tell who’s had to judge this competition by looking at this score. White space, hooray! And nice break out of skills, etc…Yay! Sorry to get a little less wordy at the end....getting tired, and I wasn't typing these as I was judging, so some impressions were unfortunately lost in my memory. I just wanted you to know that it is not lack of interest in your entries:). Again, congrats to everyone who participated, particularly our winners! Way to go all!
Kit_the_Odd 03-23-07, 11:42 PM	But I do like the addition of the intelligent weapon (does he have a large nose?). If you read my response to Zherog's comments you can see where Cyrano the Rapier of Wit ;) came from. And I had thought about describing the hilt as looking like a face with the blade in place of the nose, but I decided that might be going a bit too far. Not a whole lot of justification for him as a bard. I like the idea, but I had to look at his stats to figure out what his class was. Yeah, a definite weakness. Basically I chose bard to tie into the love of old stories as well as play off the common (mis)perception of a bard being rather useless. I also considered adding some paladin in there, but ended up deciding against it. Would have been nice to have some actual enemies and not just general enmity. Surely Don’s got some lord he’s annoyed or some evil-doer he’s put away or something like that… And you forgot Dulcinea, but I won’t deduct points for that. Or for the fact that Rocinante is no warhorse ;). I definately thought about these, but just ran out of time trying to make it all work. My earlier comments mentioned my change of concept late in the game. I especially wanted Dulcinea and the Knight of Mirrors in there. I totally missed the fun I could have had with Rocinante though. Don would be a fun person to have in a party. Thanks! I sure think so. Actually I'm thinking about tinkering with him a bit an using him as a NPC with a group I just started. I'll be taking them through the Shattered Gates of Slaughtergarde, so I need to find a good place to fit him in. I'll also need to drop him quite a few levels to match the party's range. Don's Whirling Blade spell requires a slashing weapon as a focus. A rapier is a piercing weapon, and he'd be ill-advised to throw his only weapon anyway. He cannot cast this spell. Someone (possibly you?) did this in a previous competition as well, but I think I didn’t post my comments for that one. Sorry, but you still should’ve checked on it. Would have been nice to see his to hit modifier with touch and ranged touch attacks, since he owns wands that give him each. Glad to see he has plenty of practical items. But he should probably own a shortbow, seeing as how you’ve given him a to hit modifier for one. Doh! Doh! Doh! Reasonably clear, though a reference for the Seeker of the Song prestige class would have helped very much. Also, the level chart was nice, but hard to read. Thanks for the comments, I'll work on that next time.
Mercurius 03-24-07, 12:11 PM	Sorry about the delay – I had to work all day yesterday. Thematic Creativity: Not bad, but straight up leadership and little in the way of interesting twists don't do it for me too much. Bastian is pretty cool, though. Background: Good use of adventuring with a decent amount of history provided. No real villains carrying over, but there's a reasonably easy to use plot hook in there. Sadly, your cohort seems to do more of immediate interest in your story, but that might be due to him dive-bombing a cultist. Rules Use: Math errors in gold accumulation and lacking standard adventuring gear have hurt you here. Your attack rolls are a tad too low, and you didn't account for your small size grappling penalty, while your Heal mods are out of whack. You also fail to list languages known. Also, Cassius's mount doesn't have a saddle. Clarity: Pretty easy to find everything. I prefer vertical divisions rather than paragraphs for gear, spells, etc, but level breakdown helps a lot. Cassius could have benefited from that as well. Thematic Creativity: Nice idea, using an intelligent item as a "cohort." Guiding mentor as suit of armor is nicely done, too. Love the thematic gear derived from Gold Dragon body. Very cool. Background: I like many touches in the background. This character has earned her levels questing and campaigning. There's not much in the way of supporting cast, but it's not all bad. She'd fit into a party well enough. Rules Use: Your armor's stats are really wonky, and as I price it, it's 300 gp over the maximum single value, even assuming that's correct. Also, your saves are off (I think you forgot that Knight gets a good Will save instead of Fort). You also have an extra feat that's unaccounted for. As a paladin, Thibaude should have one spell per day due to her wisdom score. Also, for a twelfth level combatant character, Thibaude's attack rolls are rather low. Clarity: No indication of initial level, and skill point breakdowns would have been appreciated. The stat block you used, though an old 3.5 standard, is a pain to sift through. Thematic Creativity: You've managed an intelligent sword and a cohort, so this is all very nice. The cohort fits well and is a nice addition to your character and the sword also flows well with your concept. You treat your cohort well in your background, too, which is very nice. Background: I recognize that this character is heavily based on an actual literary work, and I was very torn over whether or not you should have points deducted for that. In the end, it feels as though you've made it work quite well and had a very good twist or two to improve it (giants disguised as windmills! Brilliant!). I enjoyed reading it very much and he has a nice character and good relationships with his supporting cast. The lack of major antagonists hurts a little, but not terribly, as he'll get into enough trouble that I as DM could easily work with him. The main problem I see is that the Primal Music tie-in for Seeker of the Song doesn't seem as well integrated as it otherwise could. Rules Use: Almost everything's perfect. Seeker of the Song gives you 5 skill points per level, not 7, so you over spent for 2 levels, and your bardic knowledge doesn't progress with the PrC, so it'd only be +10./ You lack a slashing weapon for Whirling Blade, so it's a useless spell. With all the Bardic Music uses this guy probably goes through, I'd have recommended Extra Bardic Music as a feat, but Wandstrike is handy and I can see you've planned for it. You should probably own a bow and some arrows, though. Clarity: Page references, level, and age breakdowns. It's all so very easy to read and find. Excellent! Thematic Creativity: Most spellcasters I've seen regard their familiar as, at best, a bonus feat and hp or, at worst, an XP liability. Your character, background and stat-wise, actually use her familiar well. It's a good thing to see familiars getting this sort of treatment. Background: I like the character's personality, which comes through in the background very well. The main issue I have is that there is little indication of just how Kaylee became 12th level. Petty theft and minor fortune telling do not a 12th level make, and her daring exploits are sadly too glossed over to really count. Some recurring enemies,such as rival thieves or bounty hunters looking for her (possibly sent by Durin), would have helped here, both for plot hooks and justification. I must add, I had figured your bluff and detect thoughts abilities were likely how Kaylee did her "fortune telling," so that added for me, rather than detracted. Rules Use: Oh, boy. Here's where things get sticky. First, one must be able to cast third level spells to get into arcane trickster, which a 5th level sorcerer cannot. Replacing a level of rogue would still get you where you are, save for skill ranks, unfortunately. Speaking of, you are missing 9 skill points, all from arcane trickster levels. Saves are miscalculated, too. You're missing a feat you should have gotten for leveling, and you have 5 more gold to spend on gear, but you might want to find room in the budget for a Handy Haversack, because at the moment Kaylee's at her medium encumbrance, losing the benefits of evasion and taking a -3 penalty on several skill checks. Kudos on taking a deck of illusions, though. They're very cool. Also, you didn't buy ammunition for your crossbow. Clarity: Very good use of stat block breakdown. Level progression was needed, though the skill point spending jumble was something of a pain to deal with. Thematic Creativity: Good use of your followers. They're not just add-ons or side-effects of your feat. Your cohort is interesting enough (though how one could confuse a dwarf for an elf is beyond me). Background: This character's background is a little odd. There's lots of combat and such to justify his level, but he's presented as being in the middle of a campaign – he'd be hard to put into any other adventure. He also seems like far too much of a leader – so much so that he doesn't seem to play well with other party members who don't take orders. There seem to be several convenient breaks in his narrative, too, which allow him to always come out smelling like roses. Unfortunately, the overall background just doesn't inspire me. Rules Use: You seem to be missing two stat buy points, various elven traits (immunity to sleep, low light vision, etc), you spent two too many skill points, you forgot your Bless spell-like ability, and the price of several pieces of gear you own are off (your sword, for example, is prices as if it were a greatsword). Your traveler's outfit doesn't add to your encumbrance if it's the outfit you're wearing. Finally, with all that extra gold, having a masterwork lance would be a decent idea. You didn't specify your mount's barding, either, so it's hard to figure out if that's priced correctly. Clarity: Lots of easy to read breakdowns, except for your horse's barding, and the level breakdown is a bit hard to read. You didn't specify where your +3 shield bonus derives (technically, you would have a +3 shield bonus vs. one opponent at a time, thanks to your feat and class selections...) Thematic Creativity: Very well done, and you certainly show your sidekick the love. He's a very interesting character, and works well with the theme. Background: Well written, though very long, due in part to the sblocks. It would seem many paladins' special mounts are embodiments of dearly departed equines, judging from the entries in this competition, something I'd never thought of. You've got several supporting NPCs, an actual HOME that you own, and a dynamic story that is well presented. While your character is, in a way, in the middle of a quest at the moment, it feels easier to work him into a group than some. Rules Use: The big thing here, unfortunately, is that the cornerstone of your concept, the Cavalier PrC, requires 4 ranks in Knowledge (Nobility & Royalty), meaning you don't meet the prereqs. Considering your character's background, higher ranks seem almost mandatory, too. You also miscalculated your Reflex and grapple scores (one too high, two too low, respectively), and I actually count an extra 1,080 gp to spend. Clarity: My main complaint here is the lack of bolding in your entries, which would make it a bit easier to note headers and such. Also, there's one missing footnote in your adventuring gear list. Otherwise,this is a breeze to read, and I'm glad to see summaries of your tactical feat options and other special attacks and qualities.
Kit_the_Odd 03-24-07, 01:38 PM	Rules Use: Almost everything's perfect. Seeker of the Song gives you 5 skill points per level, not 7, so you over spent for 2 levels, Um, that's what I've got. I probably should have specified that the numbers listed in the level breakdown were skill points spent, not ranks bought. I think that is what caused the confusion. and your bardic knowledge doesn't progress with the PrC, so it'd only be +10./ Doh! I'll have to watch that next time. I used HeroForge 4.0.4 and it gave me the +12, but after checking my books you are indeed correct. Thanks again to all the judges for your time and effort. Someday I'd like to join your ranks, but I'm going to have to do better to qualify.
JasonOrlandoHawk 03-24-07, 02:00 PM	and the fact that he doesn’t, technically, qualify for the cavalier prestige class. It requires 4 ranks in Knowledge(Nobility and Royalty)…Araithor has only 3. :embarrass How did I miss that one? :banghead: jennibert & Mercurius, thank you for your comments. I feel about three inches tall now... but I still appreciate you taking time to provide them anyways. It helps me learn what to watch for when I build characters. I'm not quite sure on the gold issue. I added my totals up several times before submitting my character, and I came up right on the money. After Zherog mentioned the issue, I added the totals up again, and came up right on the money. I may have unintentionally hid some of the prices too well, since everyone is saying I came up short... but I guess that's a Clarity issue. And I would like to issue a special thanks to jennibert for taking over one of my typical duties in this competition: Pointing out which characters are running completely naked! :D Thanks again, everyone! Jason
Zherog 03-24-07, 03:13 PM	Doh! I'll have to watch that next time. I used HeroForge 4.0.4 and it gave me the +12, but after checking my books you are indeed correct. +12 is indeed correct - you get a +2 bonus from having 5 or more ranks in Knowledge (history). ;)
Kit_the_Odd 03-24-07, 05:02 PM	Thanks Z! I was surprised that HeroForge would have that wrong. But instead I just didn't know why it was right! I guess that's another clarity issue, needing to specify that +10 was from Bard levels and +2 was from the Knowledge bonus.
Mercurius 03-24-07, 06:34 PM	jennibert & Mercurius, thank you for your comments. <snip> And I would like to issue a special thanks to jennibert for taking over one of my typical duties in this competition: Pointing out which characters are running completely naked! :D You are quite welcome, on both counts:) I probably wouldn't have even noticed the clothes if you hadn't pointed them out so often. But since mundane gear is one of my particular things to look at as well....;) And to Kit the Odd: Glad you appreciated my comments as well, and I would love to know how your party handles an interaction with Don! As for judging--hang in there. Your characters are always very good, so I'm sure you'll come out on top some day! By the way, this is jennibert. Mercurius and I share a computer right now, and I forgot to check and see who was logged in. Silly me.
Zherog 03-26-07, 05:16 PM	Just a quick update for Endarrion and Shan: I've starting going over your characters. I expect to have feedback posted by Wednesday or so at the latest.
Endarrion 03-26-07, 08:30 PM	Don't worry about mine. I know it's pretty bad (uninteresting background to start) so I understand if you're too busy to go through it. Looking forward to the next contest!
Zherog 04-02-07, 04:40 PM	Later than I wanted, but finally - comments on our two late entries! My apologies for the lateness of these comments. Hopefully they’re still useful. I didn’t dig into math stuff to the level I normally would. This contest took me a long time to judge characters – just about everyone was up near my typical “max” of 2 hours or so. Most of that comes from verifying the math. So to save myself some time, it’s not quite as thorough as other entries. Math Stuff AC: 28 (8armor + 2deflection + 5dex + 1size + 2dodge agile fighting) Flat footed: 28 (+8armor + 2def + 1size + 5dex + 2dodge) Touch: 20 (2def + 5dex + 1size + 2dodge) Don’t forget trap sense applies to AC as well as Reflex saves. HP: 42 I get 44. You get 6 at first level, and 3.5 for each of the additional levels. 3.5X11=38.5. 38+6=44. Fortitude: +4 (3base + 1racial) You’ve done a nice job increasing your Will save. But I would really worry about this save. It’s going to be a real weak point for your character. Skills <Snippy McSnip was here! This is definitely a place I didn’t spend as much time as usual during the verification process. Typically what I do is list every skill you have in a spreadsheet, and then try to get to your numbers without looking at your breakdown. If I have trouble backing into a total (typically because of cross class skills), that’s when I look at the details. If your notes help me verify things, you get a little boost to your clarity score. So, even though I didn’t verify your numbers, I do have a few comments. First, Kudos for catching all your synergies – especially the ones that only apply in certain circumstances (such as your Use Rope/Escape Artist synergies). Second: Hide: +15 (10ranks + 5Dex) You also receive a +4 size bonus to Hide checks, because you’re small. Disable Device: +13 (8ranks + 5Dex) ... Open Lock: +20 (15ranks + 5Dex) You have a +2 circumstance bonus on these from your masterwork thieves’ tools. Third: You suffer a bit, in my opinion, from not specializing. In my opinion, the D&D skill system rewards people who focus their skills rather than people who dabble. Now, your dabbling isn’t quite as bad as it could be. For example, I’ve seen plenty of times when somebody puts one rank into a skill. Frankly, that’s pretty useless – the DCs you’ll face are going to make that one rank useless. Your skills aren’t maxed, but they are all at decent (if not great) numbers. As someone who makes a living breaking and entering, there’re certainly some skills that are more important than others. You have Open Locks maxed. But your Search skill isn’t; do you expect to be able to find level appropriate traps? When you do manage to find a trap, do you expect to have the skill to disable it, even though your Disable Device isn’t maxed? Do you think you’ll see or hear the guards approaching? These are the sorts of things I mean. Your skills aren’t bad. And leaving Tumble, for example, at a total of +15 is a good thing – because you always do what you need, and you can move at full speed without penalty (thanks to your cool class features). But there’s definitely other skills where you would be better off focusing. Equipment <Snippy McSnip... Aw, you get the idea by now> This is another place I skimped a little when verifying your character. Normally, I drop equipment into a spreadsheet, and then verify the costs and weight (for encumbrance). I spend a great deal of time looking up stuff to get weights and double check some costs. So, that said... You’re nekkid. :) You also seem to have a general lack of “normal” adventuring gear. Caltrops, for example, make a great tool for a thief trying to get away after being caught. Various Investments and Favors** 10,000gp This comes back to a “Wealth by Level” rant I posted earlier (in Jason’s entry). Basically, characters have limited resources (cash), and the game expects that they spend that cash on things that make them better in combat – they need to hit better, do more damage, and avoid being hit in order to survive. So every time a character spends money on “favors” (or a house, or really fancy clothes, or an expensive meal, or whatever), they’re doing things to make themselves less survivable. And I think that’s rotten. I really wish there was a good way to divorce the two so spending money on cool things like a house or whatever didn’t affect your combat ability. On to Brick... Rogue 4, Fighter 6 From a purely optimization point of view, I would really love to see you flip-flop those two – make Brick a rogue 6/fighter 4. Fighter 5 has to be one of the absolute worst levels of any class in the game. You get +1 BAB and sucktastic skills. There’s no class features, and even your saves don’t go anywhere. We could go into a discussion of pure optimization and what gets you the best bang for your buck. I’m not sure it’s really something to worry about in this contest too much though. I just felt like pointing it out. Consider it a mini rant. :) Evasion Remember that while you have evasion, you can’t use it because you’re wearing medium armor. Equipment (Based on NPC gear value pg 127) I generally allow cohorts to use PC wealth. Of course, we didn’t specify for this contest, because we generally don’t expect people to fully stat out cohorts. Background Stuff they were both orphans So I’ve mentioned it plenty of times, but it’s worth repeating. Having your character as an orphan is fine and dandy. It brings a certain feel to the background, and makes for an easy way to explain why he/she took to the streets making a living on petty crime. Just don’t expect me, as a DM, to totally stick to that. You should expect to somehow or other run into one of your parents at some point in your life – a dream, or an undead creature, or whatever. the Nightsong Guild So... For whatever reason, I have an irrational hatred of this organization. I’ve held it ever since it first appeared in Dragon magazine, and it carried over to the publication of the two prestige classes in Complete Adventurer. I was trying to figure out how to put aside my personal biases with your character, and then I realized I didn’t need to, since you effectively thumbed your nose at them. :D I would’ve liked a little more detail of previous jobs in your background. Mostly because it would give me, as a DM, another hook or two to work with. But overall, you have some really good stuff for a DM to take to help customize the game to your character. There’s the guild, of course. And a DM can always make up some noble you robbed. As for your favors and such built into your background. I like the concept. I think it would’ve been good to supply one example in your background. For instance, you could’ve provided a quick paragraph where Roscoe arranges to get some healing from a church that would be opposed to a thieves’ guild. It would do two things. First, it would expand your story, which is always good. Second, it would provide a specific example of how you envision these favors working, which would then (hopefully) help the DM create more as needed. Aside from that, there has to be somebody who considers Roscoe as a friend, other than Brick. Nobody from the orphanage? No childhood friend? No former partner in crime who went off to do other things? Finally, Brick was interesting. I generally dislike half-orcs (that whole optimization thing again), but Brick produces an amusing mental picture, and should be fun around the table. Other Stuff Thief-Acrobat I so love this class. I love it so much, I considered using it for HC8. Math Stuff HP 77 By my calculations, he should have 70 hit points. He gets 10 at first level, and 5.5 each addition level. 5.5X11=60.5. 60+10=70. Natural +10 That’s not a natural armor bonus; it’s a base that everybody has. Dexterity +0 You have a +1 Dex mod, and full plate armor allows you to use up to that amount. You seem to be carrying a light load (up to 133 lbs is a light load for your Str). So I can’t figure out why you have a +0 here. Ring +3 The item doesn’t matter, only the bonus type. The ring of protection grants a deflection bonus to AC. Str 20/ +5 Dex 12/ +1 Con 11/ +0 Int 10/ +0 Wis 14/ +2 Cha 14/ +2 So I have no way of knowing what your base stats were, which makes verifying your point by really difficult. If you had your entry in on time, I’d try to figure out where you put your three points from leveling up, but I’m going to go ahead and just skip that exercise in math. For future reference, it’s always in your best interests to let the judges know how you got the stats you have. Tell them which abilities are enhanced by magic; tell them where you put your increases at every fourth level, and so on. Fortitude +11= +8/ +1/ +2 Reflex +6= +4/ +0/ +2 You have a +0 Con mod and a +1 Dex mod. So you should have Fort and Reflex saves of +10 and +7 respectively. Longsword(+3) +20/ +15/+10 1d8+8 19-20x2 Slashing/Piercing Longswords are not piercing weapons. Mighty Composite Longbow (+5) +13/ +8/ +3 1d8+3 x3 Piercing I can’t figure out what that +5 is in parentheses. It’s not a +5 weapon, because you only paid 5600 for it; and it’s not the Strength bonus, because a) you’re only adding +3 to your damage and b) it wouldn’t cost that much. So I really can’t figure this one out. Your attack values appear to be correct for a plain ol’ bow - +12 BAB, +1 Dex. Ride <+15> [15] (+0) You have a +1 Dex mod; you also receive a +2 bonus to Ride skills as a synergy from having 5 or more ranks in Handle Animal. Smite Evil 3/Day ... Lay on Hands ... Turn Undead I say this fairly regularly. You probably want to include information for these abilities on your character sheet. When you go to use smite evil, for example, during a game, you don’t want to have to dive into the Player’s Handbook to figure out that you get a +2 to the attack roll and a +12 to the damage roll. You want that information right there on the sheet. Spells Per Day 1st- 1 2nd- 1 3rd- 1 You also receive bonus spells from your Wisdom. In total, you’d be able to cast 2 1st level spells, 1 2nd level spell, and 1 3rd level spell. In addition, you have to prepare those spells ahead of time, so you should indicate that sort of information on your character sheet as well. Total Carried Weight: 84 lbs Total Money Carried: 5,382g; 9s I’m not going to compute your equipment weight and all that like I would if I were actually judging this contest. But two things here: 1) That’s an awful lot of cash to leave unspent. There’re plenty of things you could acquire for that kind of wealth that would help your character. You could, for example, purchase a +2 item for any stat and still have over 1300 gold left over. 2) Does that 84 pounds include the weight of all those coins? I’m too lazy to figure it out for an entry I’m not actually judging; but my suspicion is that it does not. Full Plate 26,650g (Cost of Armor; Heavy Fortification) In order to add heavy fortification (or any other special ability) to a piece of armor, you must first give it a +1 enhancement bonus. So that makes your armor effectively a +6 item, which costs too much for one piece of equipment in this contest. Longsword 25,315g (Cost of Sword;+3 Bonus) Here’s another item whose cost doesn’t make sense. A +3 enhancement bonus on a weapon costs 18K; so this should cost a total of 18,315. I’m not sure where the other 7K is coming from. Mighty Composite Longbow +5,600g And as mentioned above, I really can’t figure this one out. A +1 enhancement bonus would cost 2,000; a +2 enhancement bonus would cost 8,000. Each point of “mighty” would add 100 gold to the cost. So I can’t even begin to figure out where 5600 is coming from, and your stats for your attack and damage with the bow don’t help me figure it out. Tithe 8,800g Wow. That’s a lot of money to “throw” away. And it comes back, again, to the fact that wealth by level doesn’t really take into account spending money in a way that doesn’t improve you for combat. Other points on your equipment: You don’t have any clothes. The only mundane equipment you have are a backpack (which, by the way, isn’t strong enough to carry all your coins), bedroll, and waterskin. Nothing else? No rope? No pot to cook dinner in? No food? Starting Equipment:Scale Mail 50g; Light Wooden Shield 3g (He donated this to the church, so no selling price is included) This is irrelevant. What equipment you had at the start has no bearing on your character now. On to Sister Fred: HP 25 This should be 26. You have 10 at first level, and 5.5 each additional level. 5.5X3=16.5. 16.5+10=26.5 (round down to 26). Search <+1> (-1) {+2} Search is Int based, so you would actually have a +0 ability mod, for a total of +2. Total Money Carried 619g; 9s Again, I suspect you aren’t taking the weight of those coins into account when figuring your load. Background Stuff I have two real big concerns about your entry. First, there’s no actual connection between the two. The idea, basically, was to establish a connection somehow through the rules (Leadership, a familiar, an animal companion, training a wild animal, etc). Once you had the connection, we were looking for the background of the two to be intertwined. You got the second half of that OK, but you really missed out on the first part. Second, and most importantly, there’s no way at all that Sister Fred will survive a level appropriate encounter. My group right now is in the 11-12th level range. If Sister Fred were a tag-along with my group, I’d kill him by accident. I’d really have to go out of my way to make sure he lived. And a DM shouldn’t have to do that. Even if you pick up the Leadership feat, though, and level Sister Fred up to 10th level, there’s still all sorts of wackiness about him. Why does he wear the blindfold? That doesn’t make any sense to me. I suspect it was an attempt to be humorous, but it just strikes me as odd. Your background doesn’t do much to give me a sense of what Devorczek has accomplished in his life. I’m not seeing how he gained 12 levels. The potential is there, of course. Stuff has happened. But you didn’t provide the details needed to believe he was that level. But what’s in your background could just as easily have accompanied a fourth level character. Nothing really sets it apart as being for a mid-level hero. Other Stuff So I was really critical of your entry. :( I hope that doesn’t deter you from entering future competitions...