Post/Author/DateTime	Post
#1 silverhuntress Apr 06, 2015 11:05:03	So I have a player in my group that is constantly making the game slow down and generally unfun to play. I have seen this player bring back characters that I am 99% certain died. Play "lawful evil" characters more like they are "chaotic evil". Caused 3 people to leave a game recently after 10 hours on an expedition that should have taken 4. I am tired of him making sexual innuendos about women at the table, which as a woman makes me feel uncomfotable around him. I am tired of the racist remarks me makes "in character" about elves. I have complained to DMs as well as the local co-ordinator who just shrug it off. Where do I go now? Clearly he needs to be dealt with, but how?
#2 Ainulindalion Apr 06, 2015 12:18:34	First off, it sounds like your local DMs and your LC aren't doing their job.   I cannot think of any way you could actually be playing the game and extend a 4 hour module into 10 hours without the DM at least failing at their job.  If the LC was present, they should have been going 'WTF?', as should have any store coordinator.  That's not considerate of anyone or their time.   First off, the Code of Conduct insists that players conduct themselves in a manner that is not disruptive to the enjoyment or safety of others at the event.   Second, the Code of Conduct suggests that players who feel that another player is violating the first point confront the player doing so and politely explain why and ask them to stop.   Third, if players being bothered by the disruptive behavior are uncomfortable confronting another player, they are to bring it to the attention of their DM, Store Coordinator, LC, and then probably RC followed by Admins.   "Bringing back dead characters" - there are a number of options that allow for this, including faction charity (at levels 1-4) and then paying for the raise dead service after level 4.  If the player is clearly not using one of those (or using them incorrectly), they are clearly cheating.  Cheating at D&D is bad form (and really, really sad), but isn't disruptive behavior in and of itself.  The DM ought to be smacking it down, though.   "Lawful evil as chaotic evil" - again, see the previous point about cheating.   "Causing multiple people to depart the game" - is pretty much the definition of disruptive behavior and failure on the part of the DM and organizer - it should have never gotten that far.   "Sexual innuendo concerning specific gender" - falls under probably both the Disruptive Behavior and the Unsafe Behavior categories as defined in the ALPG (on pg 15).   "Rascist comments concern elves" - If he's using elves as a subsitute for something real world, see the previous point.  If he's just not a very creative roleplayer (all his characters are exactly the same, ie, rascist towards elves), then encourage him to step outside his box - maybe to play an elf.   Talk to your other players in your group:  if they feel similarly to you, they should all speak up.  Multiple complaints about the same person from different, unrelated (except for playing at the same table) players should provoke a response.  If the rest of the group does not feel the same way, you should probably try to locate another place to play.   If multiple, unrelated players have all complained, and the DM and the event organizer and possibly the LC have done nothing, the next step is to bring it to the attention of your Regional Coordinator.  http://dndadventurersleague.org/regional-pages/   Given the volunteer nature of Adventurer's League play, nothing really official can be done (though organizers and LCs who are not doing their job can probably be repremanded and removed).  If you are unable to get results from the successive steps of AL OrgChart, the only other solution would be to potentially contact Wizard's customer support.     On the other hand, if you perfer a less nuclear option, I suggest volunteering to DM locally.  If he shows up and does the behavior you have described, use your DM power to smack him down or eject him if needed.  Warnings should be sufficient for most people, though.
#3 Skerrit Apr 06, 2015 12:36:16	Have you mentioned to the player that his play style is unpleasant for others and maybe he might be willing to try something new or even might want to try DMing instead of playing for a change of pace. Also, where do you play? You might try speaking with whomever is the store owner and make it clear that players are leaving his/her store and taking their dollars with them because of this one player. If that doesn't work, make sure your LC and RC know the situation.
#4 Coredump00 Apr 06, 2015 16:50:20	silverhuntress wrote:
#5 Tyranthraxus Apr 06, 2015 18:35:03	What is the current DM doing about it now? Is he/she doing nothing and laughing along with the persons innuendo and the like? Does he ignore it and hope everyone else does too ?
#6 Oraibi Apr 06, 2015 22:55:08	Talk to your DM privately about your concerns. If your DM does not take you seriously and work to solve the problem, that DM is breaking AL rules.   If that's happening, then don't play with that player OR with that DM again. And talk to your store/local/area/regional coordinator(s).
#7 Oraibi Apr 06, 2015 23:02:32	Coredump00 wrote:
#8 abanathie Apr 07, 2015 0:29:33	This might be alittle out of line; however, I do strongly disagree with sexual harrassment.    First, is there at least fifteen employees at the place of harrassment?  If so, you can ask the EEOC for their assessment without a formal process.  In other words, you can ask them if there is a legal recourse or for general advice on how to handle a situation like this before or without making a claim.  Keep in mind that sexual harrassment isn't limited by a supervisor, co-worker or a subordinate; it also applies to vendors, contractors and customers.  Any business with more than 15 employees is, last time I checked, subject to federal laws on Equal Opportuntiy and by extension sexual harrassment.  Many states also have a EO commission that covers businesses with less than 15 employees.  Second, were there three females harrassed or just one that made three people quit the group?  Is there a possibility of three testimonies to this effect?  These questions are likely to be asked by the EEOC.  Don't answer them here; I just wanted to point out that you should have your thoughts and memories in order for any discussion on the matter.   In either case, it can't hurt to ask them for advice.  Technically, they are paid professionals in handling these type of situations.  You might get a cookie cutter letter as a response, or you might get a genuine response from an actual person.  You'll never know if don't attempt to use that resource; in either case, they are paid to deal with these types of questions.
#9 Nevvur Apr 07, 2015 0:51:13	I think this situation does warrant a higher authority than the DM, since he's been complicit in the Bad Guy's behavior by not stopping it, but bringing in the federal government is going to punish the store more than the Bad Guy. I think the best person to speak to is the store owner. As mentioned, if other players are being driven away, that affects the owner's livelihood.
#10 Mommy_was_an_Orc Apr 07, 2015 7:23:15	Oraibi wrote:
(Reply to #7) Coredump00	Oraibi wrote:
#12 Pauper Apr 07, 2015 11:02:13	I empathize with your situation -- it seems that there is always going to be a certain population of adolescent gamers (of every age group) who uses the game as an excuse to express unpopular or 'trolling' behaviors in a way that gives them deniability. ("Hey, what are you getting upset about? It's just a game!")   With that said, if you've gone to both the DM and the local co-ordinator, and they don't seem all that interested in dealing with the situation, there's not a whole lot you can do other than 'vote with your feet' and find another location that hopefully will be better-organized and better-behaved.   Ainulindalion has provided the link to the regional coordinators page, and you're certainly welcome to express your concerns to the Regional Coordinator -- I have no doubt that the RC will listen and take your concerns seriously, and will mention those concerns to the LC in his/her chain of command. Unfortunately, if the culture of the store is such that this sort of behavior is tolerated or even accepted, I don't know that a friendly reminder will have a large impact.   I do hope you find a better game -- AL specifically and D&D as a whole are absolutely not about letting people get away with bad behavior, even if that is some groups' preferred style of play.   -- Pauper
#13 Coredump00 Apr 07, 2015 12:16:01	My guess is the 'local coordinator' he spoke with is actually the coordinator for the store.  Probably not the Local Coordinator of the region.  So contacting the actual Local Coordinator is also an option.   Of course, if he *is* the Local Coordinator, they you really should contact the Regional Coordinator, because he/she should know what the LC is doing.
#14 abanathie Apr 07, 2015 14:53:28	Nevvur wrote:
#15 BRJN Apr 07, 2015 15:05:52	abanathie wrote:
#16 Avross Apr 07, 2015 15:29:00	One of the best pieces of advice I've seen so far in this thread is to be vocal.   Letting both the offending player as well as other players know that you are not impressed/amused/appreciative of the offending behavior will (a) Let the offender know they've crossed a line.   Let's be honest, many gamers aren't known for their interpersonal skills...they may simply be lacking a ny sort of clue.  Awareness is the first step towards adjusting behavior. (b) Let other people who might be offended that they are not alone...sometimes people don't say anything because they don't think "it's their place", or "don't want to be the one starting a fight". (c) Let YOU know if you're the only one being offended...in which case, find a new table.     The DMs, the LCs, and the store should be part of the solution...but as the person who is being offended, YOU need to be part of it to.    One of the stores I play at has an issue where 3-4 people are no longer willing to play at a table  with a certain person who is very abrasive.   And nothing is going to get fixed because everyone is looking for someone else to deal with it.   And that results in the abrasive player being better...but only to the person who talks to him.
#17 abanathie Apr 07, 2015 15:53:49	BRJN wrote:
(Reply to #14) Nevvur	abanathie wrote:
(Reply to #16) Pauper	Avross wrote:
#20 BRJN Apr 08, 2015 13:51:06	silverhuntress wrote:
#21 abanathie Apr 08, 2015 14:43:52	Pauper wrote:
#22 Riley37 Apr 19, 2015 2:16:28	Speaking up has many merits. First, as others have mentioned, it closes off the "but no one ever said anything!" defense. Second, it's a way to check for misunderstandings. The examples cited seem more than a misunderstanding alone could cause, but checking is a good habit. Third, it encourages others to speak up. If they all feel as you do, and say so, then your position becomes much stronger. If they all say that they enjoy this guy's play style, well, now you know. Fourth, if the guy is NOT beyond redemption, then it gives him a chance to start thinking and reflecting and maybe someday changing. If you speak up and still this guy and the DM refuse to change, then you might decide that this is not the table for you. If so, if you stop playing there, then please report to someone higher up in the "chain of command", for the sake of other players, and particularly women, who are checking out 5E D&D, whose first contact is this store's AL. If that's their first impression of D&D, then the game could lose more and more good players. (If they find some other game, and another game gets a good player, and the player has fun, then that's a net victory for the hobby in general, though not for 5E D&D.) Anyways, whatever you do, thanks for starting this thread. Getting people thinking and talking about behavioral boundaries is generally a good thing!