Topic will be a surprise
Win custom title
Haiku format
Must make fun of some facet of D&D stereotypes.
Can also make fun of myself or WolfStar76.
The funnier the Haiku, the better.
No vulgarity.
I will narrow field down to 10, which will then be voted upon by VCLs/ORCs/CM and whomever else I can
Winner gets, at a minimum, a custom title. I am also trying to get a custom avatar as a prize as well.
Contest to start at 12:01 am (EST) April first and end at 12:01 AM (EST) April 2nd.
One other possible subject matter area to come.
Entries are to be submitted in this thread.
One entry per person, no editing permitted longer than 30 minutes past the time of posting, so make sure that your entry is a good one.
Rules:
Contest to start at 12:01 am (EST) April first and end at 12:00 (EST) April 2nd.
Er is that Noon on the 2nd or do you mean a 24 hour window.
And it is a 24-hour window.
I will make it clear in the first post.
Contest begins for a win.
Posted the rules near.
TOO BaD ThIS UNIt CaN'T WiN
(BiG BRAIn Is UnFAIR).
Lost my place but gained a friend
I'm a monster, Rawr!!
RPGA Smelliness
They smell real real bad
(remember, funny good, mean bad)
Zone of heroic danger!
Who's got the Cheetos?
:whatsthis
:headexplo 
"That orc I killed last Wednesday?
Should have died Round Three!"
Mom's basement and garage
Zones of heroic danger!
Who's got the Cheetos?
Two quoted posters
Should have read rules on Haiku
Format all wrong. FAIL!!
:P
Two quoted posters
Should have read rules on Haiku
Format all wrong. FAIL!!
:P
QUOTED FELLOW BRAIN IN JAR
READ AND MISINTERPRET YOUR INTENTIONS, AS MANY DO
HOW IS FORMAT = FAIL1?!
QUOTED FELLOW BRAIN IN JAR
READ AND MISINTERPRET YOUR INTENTIONS, AS MANY DO
HOW IS FORMAT = FAIL1?!
FIVE SYLLABLES, FIRST AND LAST
SEVEN FOR THE MIDDLE ONE
POOR, STUPID FLESHBAG
BRAIN IN JAR IS SYMPATHETIC AS POST WAS MADE PRIOR TO ASSIMILATION.
EDITING OF POST ALLOWED. FLESHBAG warfteiner ALSO MAY EDIT.
As IS ThIS OnES POSt AbOVE
REsIStANCE FuTILE.
Talks about for many days
Quiet, go away
----------
In basements they dwell
Rolling dice, they scream and yell
Horrible, the smell
True, this one is; but not all!
Metal arm and more?
[edit made, and yes, I have a fake arm (it's about 85% steel from elbow to shoulder thanks to some experimental surgery in 2000; guess I'm not 100% fleshbag anymore]
---
ps: for all those fussing around with haiku rules - it's 5 7 5 Mora, which is quite different to 5 7 5 syllables.
ps: for all those fussing around with haiku rules - it's 5 7 5 Mora, which is quite different to 5 7 5 syllables.
Traditional Japanese Haiku follows the mora, as opposed to syllables due to the nature of the japanese language, however there are no real hard and fast rules set out in the English language for Haiku.
In this case, however, seeing as how I set the rules for this contest ( :D ), I get to say that it is 5-7-5 syllables. That being said, if you use a word like fire (which can be pronounced in 2 syllables) I will allow it.
Removed due to realization that I was asking the impossible.
An edit? Fleshbag?!
True, this one is; but not all!
Metal arm and more?
[edit made, and yes, I have a fake arm (it's about 85% steel from elbow to shoulder thanks to some experimental surgery in 2000; guess I'm not 100% fleshbag anymore]
The contest to win,
asks only for a few things.
fun, five, seven, five.
Note: I see you did change, edit made in time before, due my slow reply.
If one wants to be more pure in what should be most of us fail
"Haiku typically contain a kigo, or seasonal reference, and a kireji or verbal caesura. In Japanese, haiku are traditionally printed in a single vertical line, while haiku in English usually appear in three lines, to parallel the three metrical phrases of Japanese haiku"
This contest is amusing
Use this for fusing
----------
http://haikuwithteeth.com/index.php
I do ask that you indicate that the word is to be pronounced in 2 syllables as opposed to simply 1.
and how/why would/should i do that?
fire is always pronounced as :\ˈfi-ər\ (from my dictionary - do you americans pronounce it differently?)
and how/why would/should i do that?
fire is always pronounced as :\ˈfi-ər\ (from my dictionary - do youamericansCanadians pronounce it differently?)
I fixed your quote for you. :D
I have always pronounced fire as 1 syllable.
But I guess it would be kindof hard for people to say that a word that they have always pronounced as two syllables is pronounced by me with 1 syllable. Sorta like me asking people to tell me when something they are eating is too chocolatey for me.
So never mind that requirement.
for many us to our rue.
Try again to win.
tHE MoNKEYs LIsTENED TO ShEEP
4e FoR THe WiN!
less mudbunny says is one.
Good luck may there be.
That class is broken
it can do this and mine can't
stop your damn whining
====================
Others I had.
Paladins detect evil
Brawls ensue and people die
Heironeous smiles
---------------------
Rogue sneaks down the hall
Rolls a one to perceive traps
Leads to TPK
---------------------
Halflings Gnomes and Dwarves
Make for good companions
whether thrown or tossed
---------------------
Chaotic evil
the grief of many DMs
Chaotic stupid
---------------------
Running from Giants
crossing the field watch your head
stones fall, you are dead
---------------------
One heard "Wherez teh gnome"
But no more as they are here
being tossed as should be
---------------------
I have rolled too much
The pain dwells within my hand
carpel tunnel strikes
---------------------
Battlerager rules
temp hp makes fights easy
archers will kill him
---------------------
Dungeons and Dragons
Boosts the economy high
through soda pop sales
---------------------
Fighter steels himself
Warlock curses enemies
The bard... sings a tune
---------------------
The poor halfling rogue
thought he could be a kender.
Get the spatula.
/bow
Expensive mini
The Colossal Red Dragon
Bought with joy, then one shotted
---------------------------------
True Story...
A level up gained
Twenty four diplomacy
A virgin no more
And as a bonus all the ones I came up with and rejected.....and yes the first one in this list is a true story. *sigh*
To be reborn now
I rolled a one, oh please no
Now I'm a lizard
We fight for honor
Prepare to roll initia....
Ow you punched my nose
Screeches of joy heard
Glee unbound by all limits
A plus two he found
Shinies to be found
Guarded by uber monster
Dead sack of XP
I love Monty Hall,
Power Gaming for the win!
Lots and lots of loot!
1
Kentinal:
As clear as the mud,
Contest begins for a win.
Posted the rules near.
2
SnarkyMonkey
Once Eberron Core
Lost my place but gained a friend
I'm a monster, Rawr!!
3
sotp_seamus
We begin our quest,
A great treasure awaits us:
Fanta and Funyuns
4
warfteiner
Mom's house, dark basement
Zone of heroic danger!
Who's got the Cheetos?
5
krownhunter07
NeW CONTEnT ReLEAsED
GEeKS ReADiNG sKILLS eQUALS FaIL
NERD RAGE bad-wrong-fun
6
krancher
"Ha!" cried Rules Lawyer,
"That orc I killed last Wednesday?
Should have died Round Three!"
7
eivo
Character, he plays
Talks about for many days
Quiet, go away
8
whitebaron
a dragons treasure
and heroes always want more
fire in the hole
9
Kyros_tachyus
That class is broken
it can do this and mine can't
stop your damn whining
10
locathus
The poor halfling rogue
thought he could be a kender.
Get the spatula.
11
Ranadiel
A level up gained
Twenty four diplomacy
A virgin no more
For everyone that entered, thank you very much. I would like to do more contests, and am