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| #1DarkRexxJan 30, 2015 22:50:39 | So I gave my players the alchemy jug as their very first magic item tonight. They were pretty ambivalent until they learned that it creates mayonnaise. Though now I have a question... does it produce white mayo or yellow mayo? |
| #2OorgnidJan 30, 2015 22:56:21 | That would depend....is it Miracle Whip or the real deal. |
| #3EmpactWBJan 30, 2015 23:32:48 | If one leaves it sit long enough, it will pass through both colors. |
| #4OorgnidJan 30, 2015 23:54:32 | Wait...why did their interest spike after knowing it produced mayonnaise? |
| #5iserithJan 31, 2015 8:45:41 |
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| #6AaronOfBarbariaJan 31, 2015 9:04:57 | So Miracle Whip, right? Says "salad dressing" right on the label, and for the longest time I had never seen nor heard of anyone actually dressing a salad with it. I had heard of people using it like I would use mayonaisse, which resulted in me assuming that putting Miracle Whip on a salad would be somewhere in the realm of flavor as putting mayonaisse on a salad and finding the idea to be extremely offputting.
Then a couple of years back this new Chinese restaurant opens in my city, and as is my way I quickly pop around to see how the food is. My wife was with me, we ordered a dinner for two, and when they asked "Soup or salad?" we requested one of each so we could try both. I went for the soup because my wife expected there to be peas in it, which she does not like, and she took the salad and immediately commented that it tasted pretty good - and so when I realized their soup did not have peas in it, about halfway through the bowl, we switched.
Looking at the salad, I had no suspicions of what the dressing was. It was white, so it had to be ranch, not my favorite but no big deal... strange for a Chinese salad though. My wife hadn't made any comment either, so no suspicion raised there. That first taste, however, told me exactly what this dressing was: Miracle Whip.
It didn't taste bad. I don't go out of my way to order it, mind you, but whenever we order from that restaurant, which we do often enough for weekend dinners with my sister's family or when other familiy members are visisting, and someone decides to get some salad I get myself a serving of it.
I'm still shocked, though. In fact, I really couldn't understand why Miracle Whip was labeled as salad dressing and yet seemed to be a fill-in for mayonaisse before tasting it actually used as salad dressing, and am now even more confused how something that is so delicious on salad isn't a common dressing option at all places that sell salad.
...and I still can't stomach the stuff on a sandwich. |
| #7iserithJan 31, 2015 9:18:37 | Growing up, the mother of a friend of mine put Miracle Whip on grilled cheese sandwiches. Imagine my horror when I gratefully accepted what is probably one of the greatest sandwiches of all time and then bit into the crusty, buttery bread, melty cheese, and then tasted what can only be described best by this cartoon. (NSFW!) |
| #8AaronOfBarbariaJan 31, 2015 9:50:36 | I lived with a family for a time that enjoyed Miracle Whip. I thought "No problem, I'll just buy a small jar of mayonaisse for my own personal use, and nobody will be bothered either way."
I was wrong.
The first time the household was having hot dogs for dinner, I walked into the kitchen to find them each putting nothing on their bun other than great heaping globs of Miracle Whip and the hot dog itself. I am not exaggerating when I say that seeing this happen prevented me from eating anything for over 8 hours, and left me unable to experience desire to eat a hot dog for nearly an entire year. Even just thinking about that incident while typing this post made me feel as though there were a chance I would vomit. |
| #9OorgnidJan 31, 2015 12:43:47 |
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| #10guachiJan 31, 2015 14:31:45 | I think it's fair to say that an alchemy jug that dispenses Miracle Whip qualifies as a cursed item. |
| #11supreme_slayerJan 31, 2015 15:58:46 | Since it is not specified, just like most of its contents, i'd say it is up to the dm, or even the person pouring it. Believe it or not, some places do use it as salad dressing. Just like some cultures use salt and pepper on their salads. Also, the reason for the distinction as not mayo has to do with ingredients. Legally something cannot be called mayo if it does not have a certain minimum basis of ingredients, which include if i remember correctly, 75% vegetable oil by weight. I personally don't have a problem with miracle whip myself, but to each their own tastes. It might not even exist in your universe since the exact formula is relatively new i assume. |
| #12cowleymenJan 31, 2015 22:42:24 | LONG LIVE MIRACLE WHIP!!!
Now dont get me wrong, I like mayo, but Miracle Whip is just.....tangy?.....zany? It just has a spice behind it somewhere that I like, not to mention it feels "lighter", or thinner then most mayos I have had. Now Calories dont really bother me, this is physical taste. |
| (Reply to #4)DarkRexx |
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| #14Devils-AdvocateFeb 01, 2015 10:59:13 |
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| #15Coredump00Feb 02, 2015 13:03:15 | Miracle Whip is called salad dressing because they had to call it *something* and it can't legally be called mayonaisse, because it doesn't have the right ingredients.
It would be like making "Beer" out of rice grains and still calling it Beer.
I guess they could have called it 'Imitation Mayonaisse Food" (but I think the Oatmeal comic labels it correctly.)
BTW, I made my own mayonaisse once (since even the 'real' stuff is made with crap ingredients) but its kind of a pain to make. |
| #16AaronOfBarbariaFeb 02, 2015 13:18:36 | Um... Budweiser is made with rice. |
| (Reply to #16)Coredump00 |
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| #18CooperjeraFeb 02, 2015 14:17:12 | I also gave my players the alchemy jug. Their first question was regarding why mayonnaise was used in Faerun. Then they looked up when mayo was invented and concluded it seemed reasonalbe; however, the player with a Drow character insisted that mayo was not familiar to her. She asked if this new substance was used to destroy bridges since this was something the party needed to do this adventure.
The second thing noted was that the mayo and water could provide enough calories to keep a party alive and hydrated if needed. I was told about sticks of butter being a calorie source for mountain climbers.
Finally, a couple players indicated that if the characters were smart enough in chemistry, the base ingredients for TNT are available from the alchemy jug. I didn't follow the logic exactly but I'll trust them and look it up if they decide the characters want to try to make TNT. |
| (Reply to #17)AaronOfBarbaria |
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| (Reply to #18)AaronOfBarbaria |
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| (Reply to #2)Timborama |
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| (Reply to #19)Coredump00 |
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| (Reply to #22)AaronOfBarbaria |
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| #24Coredump00Feb 03, 2015 16:21:08 | There is a reason Wheat beer is call Wheat beer.... to differentiate it from Beer.
Adding something for flavor is completely different than changing one of the main ingredients. I can use Honey as the main ingredient to provide the sugar... doesn't make it 'Beer'. If I sell you an Omelet, but its made with potatoes instead of eggs..... that just isn't the same thing.
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| #25supreme_slayerFeb 03, 2015 16:32:24 | I'll be honest, core dump. I have absolutely no idea what you're trying to prove. Budweiser is beer. Miracle whip isn't mayo. And? |
| #26AaronOfBarbariaFeb 03, 2015 20:38:51 | Budweiser has barley, hops and added some rice... so you appear to have now proven your original argument to be wrong with your new statements. |
| #27bob_goes_upFeb 04, 2015 8:36:03 | I really like rye bread with avocadoes and miracle whip. Add lots of salt and a few raw onion rings on top. |
| (Reply to #27)AaronOfBarbaria |
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| #29JenksFeb 04, 2015 15:58:08 | Ugh, I hate both of them. LONG LIVE DIJON MUSTARD! |
| #30iserithFeb 04, 2015 18:05:40 |
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| #31DemoMonkeyFeb 05, 2015 10:32:09 | "Statements like this make me want to leave this forum FOREVAR!!11!"
Mustard is the fruit of the condiment aisle. You can barbecue it, boil it, broil it, bake it, saute it. Dey's uh, mustard-kabobs, mustard creole, mustard gumbo. Pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried. There's pineapple mustard, lemon mustard, coconut mustard, pepper mustard, mustard soup, mustard stew, mustard salad, mustard and potatoes, mustard burger, mustard sandwich...
That- that's about it. |
| #32CrimsonAssassinFeb 08, 2015 23:03:24 | What they could do with the mayonaisse: |