First Homebrew race [PEACH] - Downloaded from the Wizards Community, all coding removed by Solauren

First Homebrew race [PEACH]

Post/Author/DateTime Post
#1
broskt
Nov 20, 2009 4:55:34 This is my first attempt at a completely new race. What I wanted was something similar to the wilden, because I almost like them. So I set out to make this race, it's a mix between the hardiness of warforged, the spiritual connection of the wilden and the mystery of the deva.

So let me know how I did.

Vabrik

Average Height: 6’2” – 7’2”
Average Weight: 170 – 240

Ability Score: +2 Wisdom, +2 Strength
Size: Medium
Speed: 6
Vision: Low-light
Languages: Common, Primordial and Elven
Skill Bonuses: +2 Nature, +2 Endurance
Fey Origin: Your ancestors were native to the Feywild, so you are considered a fey creature for the purpose of effects that relate to creature origin.
Natural Spirit: When you roll a Nature check, roll twice and use the higher result.
Hardened Form: You gain a +2 bonus to death saving throws
Rooted Rooted Recovery You gain Rooted as an encounter power

Rooted Recovery
When facing danger you protect yourself with the spiritual earth around you
Encounter ♦ Healing
Immediate Reaction Personal
Trigger: An enemy hits you with an attack
Effect: You gain a number of temporary hit points equal to 3 + one-half your level. If you are bloodied, you also regain hit points equal to 3 + one-half your level. In addition each square in close burst 1 is difficult terrain for your enemies until the end of your next turn.

Play a Vabrik if you want…
to have a connection with the spiritual and natural world in which you live

to be a race that praise the essence of nature and scoff at civilized technologies

to be a member of a race that favors the druid, fighter, ranger and warden classes

Physical Qualities
Vabrik are tall plant like humanoids. Vabrik are given life and soul by the natural spirits of the world; Their bodies take on the qualities of the plants that gave them form. Some Vabrik have hard barklike skin with branch like fingers, others have fungus like growths covering their body. All Vabrik grow and change depending on their enviroment, taking on the aspect of the nature around them over time.

Playing a Vabrik
Vabrik are the embodiment of the spiritual world, much like dryads and treants. Most vabrik take on either femenine or masculine features as they grow older. Vabrik begin their lives with little knowledge of the spirits that gave them form. When they are young they are more vigilant and aggressive in their pursuits. Most vabrik eventualy speak with their spirits and are given a task, or mission, usually the protection of a certain forest or certain creatures. Vabrik societies have few members but they will inhabit an entire desert or forest. They live in the remote locations of the wild, their contact with other races is fairly limited; though elves and shifters commonly speak of them. Vabrik adventurers are commonly wardens, seekers and druids, though in some rare occasions some have been clerics or paladins in service of Balinor.

Vabrik Characteristics: Spiritual, aware, intuitive, steadfast, wise, honest, careful,
#2
slobo777a
Nov 20, 2009 6:52:06 It looks good and solid to me.

Pretty much any class would work with the main power, and the whole stat block gives the feel of a sturdy tree-like form.
#3
ah_maclimeszero
Nov 20, 2009 8:30:23 I like it! No major complaints to lodge on this one. I'm sure others will have more in-depth critiques, but I like it! Enjoy!
#4
broskt
Nov 20, 2009 8:57:57 Thank you both! If anyone wanted to suggest feat ideas I'd gladly welcome them. I've had a few ideas, increasing the burst for the racial power or extending it a round, or healing for your allies in the burst. Another one I've been wondering would be giving them access to the warforges components, though the only way other races can get this is a class specific paragon path at level 16, so I feel it's probaly overpowered at heroic tier.
#5
Qube
Nov 20, 2009 12:33:51 I think Natural spirit is slightly overpowered.
- If a normal check has 50% chance on succes, with natural spirit, has 75% chance on succes. A.k.a. +25 %, which is equivalent with about a +5 bonus.
- 60 or 40% chance --> 24%, or still a +5 bonus
- 70 or 30% chance --> 21%, or a +4 bonus

#6
Crimson_Concerto
Nov 20, 2009 15:26:12 Now, I'm sure that there are a few folk around here that can confirm how I just absolutely love to tear apart homebrew races, but this is actually pretty okay. You obviously played it safe and didn't try to do anything too innovative, but that's probably exactly what you should be doing for your first attempt anyways, so I can't really complain. =)

I think Natural spirit is slightly overpowered.

I disagree. It's comparable to the Goliath feature that does a similar thing for some Athletics checks, and Athletics is in general a much more useful skill than Nature is, so I think that this is just fine.
#7
Qube
Nov 21, 2009 6:56:13
I think Natural spirit is slightly overpowered.

I disagree. It's comparable to the Goliath feature that does a similar thing for some Athletics checks, and Athletics is in general a much more useful skill than Nature is, so I think that this is just fine.

I didn't know there was presedence. I retract my statement.

Post/Author/DateTime	Post
#1 broskt Nov 20, 2009 4:55:34	This is my first attempt at a completely new race. What I wanted was something similar to the wilden, because I almost like them. So I set out to make this race, it's a mix between the hardiness of warforged, the spiritual connection of the wilden and the mystery of the deva. So let me know how I did. Vabrik Average Height: 6’2” – 7’2” Average Weight: 170 – 240 Ability Score: +2 Wisdom, +2 Strength Size: Medium Speed: 6 Vision: Low-light Languages: Common, Primordial and Elven Skill Bonuses: +2 Nature, +2 Endurance Fey Origin: Your ancestors were native to the Feywild, so you are considered a fey creature for the purpose of effects that relate to creature origin. Natural Spirit: When you roll a Nature check, roll twice and use the higher result. Hardened Form: You gain a +2 bonus to death saving throws Rooted Rooted Recovery You gain Rooted as an encounter power Rooted Recovery When facing danger you protect yourself with the spiritual earth around you Encounter ♦ Healing Immediate Reaction Personal Trigger: An enemy hits you with an attack Effect: You gain a number of temporary hit points equal to 3 + one-half your level. If you are bloodied, you also regain hit points equal to 3 + one-half your level. In addition each square in close burst 1 is difficult terrain for your enemies until the end of your next turn. Play a Vabrik if you want… to have a connection with the spiritual and natural world in which you live to be a race that praise the essence of nature and scoff at civilized technologies to be a member of a race that favors the druid, fighter, ranger and warden classes Physical Qualities Vabrik are tall plant like humanoids. Vabrik are given life and soul by the natural spirits of the world; Their bodies take on the qualities of the plants that gave them form. Some Vabrik have hard barklike skin with branch like fingers, others have fungus like growths covering their body. All Vabrik grow and change depending on their enviroment, taking on the aspect of the nature around them over time. Playing a Vabrik Vabrik are the embodiment of the spiritual world, much like dryads and treants. Most vabrik take on either femenine or masculine features as they grow older. Vabrik begin their lives with little knowledge of the spirits that gave them form. When they are young they are more vigilant and aggressive in their pursuits. Most vabrik eventualy speak with their spirits and are given a task, or mission, usually the protection of a certain forest or certain creatures. Vabrik societies have few members but they will inhabit an entire desert or forest. They live in the remote locations of the wild, their contact with other races is fairly limited; though elves and shifters commonly speak of them. Vabrik adventurers are commonly wardens, seekers and druids, though in some rare occasions some have been clerics or paladins in service of Balinor. Vabrik Characteristics: Spiritual, aware, intuitive, steadfast, wise, honest, careful,
#2 slobo777a Nov 20, 2009 6:52:06	It looks good and solid to me. Pretty much any class would work with the main power, and the whole stat block gives the feel of a sturdy tree-like form.
#3 ah_maclimeszero Nov 20, 2009 8:30:23	I like it! No major complaints to lodge on this one. I'm sure others will have more in-depth critiques, but I like it! Enjoy!
#4 broskt Nov 20, 2009 8:57:57	Thank you both! If anyone wanted to suggest feat ideas I'd gladly welcome them. I've had a few ideas, increasing the burst for the racial power or extending it a round, or healing for your allies in the burst. Another one I've been wondering would be giving them access to the warforges components, though the only way other races can get this is a class specific paragon path at level 16, so I feel it's probaly overpowered at heroic tier.
#5 Qube Nov 20, 2009 12:33:51	I think Natural spirit is slightly overpowered. - If a normal check has 50% chance on succes, with natural spirit, has 75% chance on succes. A.k.a. +25 %, which is equivalent with about a +5 bonus. - 60 or 40% chance --> 24%, or still a +5 bonus - 70 or 30% chance --> 21%, or a +4 bonus
#6 Crimson_Concerto Nov 20, 2009 15:26:12	Now, I'm sure that there are a few folk around here that can confirm how I just absolutely love to tear apart homebrew races, but this is actually pretty okay. You obviously played it safe and didn't try to do anything too innovative, but that's probably exactly what you should be doing for your first attempt anyways, so I can't really complain. =) I think Natural spirit is slightly overpowered. I disagree. It's comparable to the Goliath feature that does a similar thing for some Athletics checks, and Athletics is in general a much more useful skill than Nature is, so I think that this is just fine.
#7 Qube Nov 21, 2009 6:56:13	I think Natural spirit is slightly overpowered. I disagree. It's comparable to the Goliath feature that does a similar thing for some Athletics checks, and Athletics is in general a much more useful skill than Nature is, so I think that this is just fine. I didn't know there was presedence. I retract my statement.