Criticism is encouraged. It's the first class related homebrew stuff I've created so be nice. : )
The .pdf is hosted at my husband and I's homebrew campaign setting here:
mydialcampaign.weebly.com/non-mydial-stu...
Or the Direct link to the .pdf:
mydialcampaign.weebly.com/uploads/3/7/9/...
I was going to point out all the errors and imbalances, but, I don't even know where to start. Maybe, you should talk about your design goals, and we can start over, keeping everything in line with current material.
Secondly, many classes dabble into different rolls based on their powers and abilities. It says right in player's handbook 2 in the druid section, and let me quote, "Depending on your choice of class features and powers, you might lean toward leader or striker as a secondary role." Why can't I make my druid all striker? There's no rules that say I can't. That's why it's called "homebrew." I can make my druid a striker if I want to. It's not even that far off from the official druid material.
Thirdly, flying is not all that powerful, imo. Lots of monsters fly and it doesn't stop them from being slaughtered. Maybe it's a little overpowered to be able to fly all the time. Maybe I should hold that off for an epic destiny or something. Maybe more like the Sky Hunter path feature where you can fly before using an action point. But that would be copying. Maybe when you use a daily power, you can fly your speed as a move action until the end of your next turn. ... or something. Also, it's not a heroic feat, it's a paragon path feature.
I plan on moving the species specific movement feat to paragon or epic tier. It doesn't make sense for a heroic level character to be able to phase and teleport and what-not. The Mastery of flight feat will have to be moved depending on when I decide the flight movement type will be available.
Also... I just noticed I took out the Bahamut's Strength feat power... opps... gotta go find that.
Anyway, thanks for the snotty criticism. It's useful in whatever form it appears. I'm looking for constructive criticism... Maybe I should have specified. Lets try for a little more "constructive" and a little less "criticism" ...
As far as design goals. I had always hoped that what form you became as a druid would affect your stats. For example, if you transformed into a bear, I would think your strength would increase and it would be simple to tear that wooden door of it's hinges. Or, if you wild shaped into a snake I would think you would become a small or tiny creature and could just slither under the door. Those are the things I was trying to bring to this druid class path. You transform into a medium sized dragon-like creature (obviously transforming into a exact replica of a dragon would be really overpowered). Something like mirroring your dragon mentor. You would have wings, so I would expect your character to be able to use them in some form. You would have some form of breath weapon and devistating claws and a slashing tail. All these aspects of dragons I wanted to bring into the class plus whatever I missed.
From page 83 of PH2 "You choose a specific form whenever you use wild shape, and that form has no effect on your game statistics or movement modes." This is the part I don't like about druids in 4e.
Why can't I make my druid all striker? There's no rules that say I can't. That's why it's called "homebrew."
Ok, well, don't ask for advice on stuff if you don't want to hear what's wrong with it. Having an at-will attack like you're proposing is crazy powerful, but the rest of the powers you suggest are really weak because they generally just do damage.
Anyway, thanks for the snotty criticism. It's useful in whatever form it appears. I'm looking for constructive criticism... Maybe I should have specified. Lets try for a little more "constructive" and a little less "criticism" ...
My constructive criticism is: "Maybe, you should talk about your design goals, and we can start over, keeping everything in line with current material."
As far as design goals. I had always hoped that what form you became as a druid would affect your stats.
This is going to be a problem. This is specifically NOT the way the Druid works. It's one of the core aspects of the Druid, actually. The best you can do, while staying in line with what has been released already, are:
1) Those utility feats that give you the ability to turn into a non-combat form with specific strengths, like the Skittering Sneak (level 2) that, well, sneaks, or the Black Harbinger (level 6) that flies.
2) Those Daily feats that give you encounter long abilities that are inspired by specific forms, but thankfully do not require you to actually take on specific forms to get it. Stuff like Primal Wolf (level 9) that lets you knock enemies prone or get a bonus to hit against prone enemies.
3) Those feats that, once again, give you bonuses reminiscent of specific forms, thankfully without requiring you to take those specific forms (Stalking Panther Form gives you a stealth and initiative bonus, Hunting Wolf Form gives you a Perception and Speed bonus). The key, though, is not to force people to be specific forms, as not everyone shares the same aesthetics.
For example, if you transformed into a bear, I would think your strength would increase and it would be simple to tear that wooden door of it's hinges.
This could easily be made into a feat...(Some Adjective) Bear Form. Maybe a +5 bonus to Strength checks to break stuff plus some other more useful benefit.
Or, if you wild shaped into a snake I would think you would become a small or tiny creature and could just slither under the door.
Skittering Sneak does that.
You would have wings, so I would expect your character to be able to use them in some form.
The earliest anyone gets all the time flight is Paragon, but I think the only way are a select few paragon paths, like the Dragonborn racial path.
You would have some form of breath weapon
Almost every Swarm Druid power could be very easily reflavored to be a breath weapon, rather than insects.
and devistating claws and a slashing tail. All these aspects of dragons I wanted to bring into the class plus whatever I missed.
Devastating claws and slashing tails are things that all Druids should have, and they do. Savage Rend, for example, is a great power. I don't see why powers like that don't sufficiently represent "devistating [sic] claws and slashing tail."
Anyway, if you want to be a Striker, do what my wife did:
1) Play a Primal Predator Druid.
2) Obtain a pair of Claw Gloves (AV2).
3) Obtain a Staff of the Serpent (AV1).
4) Multiclass Assassin for Venom Hand Master, and Venom Hand Killer.
5) Take the Coiled Serpent paragon path.
6) Profit
From page 83 of PH2 "You choose a specific form whenever you use wild shape, and that form has no effect on your game statistics or movement modes." This is the part I don't like about druids in 4e.
That is the part that makes them "4e Druids" and not "totally unfair and stupidly overpowered 3e Druids."
I am obviously not going to stop you, but I really think you should heed my advice. The abstraction is what makes this edition so great, and you're hurting the game if you take it away.
I would suggest cutting Mastery of Flight out of the pdf altogether and trimming Species Specific Movement down so that it heroic you get a movement of 1, in each of the catergories. It upgrades to a speed of 2 at 11th level and a speed of 4 at 21st level, this would be a more balanced but still powerful feat.
The only query I have with the paragon path is the level 11 encounter. By making it an implement +2 vs reflex attack it is equivalant to a weapon vs reflex. While this is okay if it is single target the attack is a close blast 3 and as such hits way too easily.
Onto the build itself; its AC is too low. There is already a problem with the Swarm Druid because it doesn't uses Dexterity or Intelligence as a secondary stat, in much the same way the Dragon Apostle doesn't. The advantage that the Swarm Druid has over this is that its secondary stat is Constitution, and so it has more HP, and it reduces damage from all ranged and melee attacks by an amount equal to its Constitution modifier. The Dragon Apostle is being used as a melee character yet it will have the worst defenses in the game. May I suggest that you let it use Strength in place of Dexterity for its AC? In much the same way that the Primal Druid works.
Now powers: (If I haven't listed a power below its because I find it to be okay and it can go unchanged)
Also as a general rule Implement vs AC attacks are very hard to hit with. This should be addressed so that each power is Implement vs a NAD or give the attack a +2/+3 bonus to hit.
Claw Rake:
WAAAAAAAAY too powerful to be an At-Will. Not only can you attack two creatures (which in itself is a decent power) you also get to move your speed? Another problem that you'll have with this power is that moving away from creatures provokes an Opportunity attack. This means if you'll want to avoid taking damage yourself you'll only move and attack one creature. To make this power more balanced you could make it so that you move your speed but can only attack one creature OR make it an attack where you don't move but can target two creatures. Also it's a Strength vs AC attack (see above)
@Kais3000 ok, now this is actually really helpful.
I would suggest cutting Mastery of Flight out of the pdf altogether and trimming Species Specific Movement down so that it heroic you get a movement of 1, in each of the catergories. It upgrades to a speed of 2 at 11th level and a speed of 4 at 21st level, this would be a more balanced but still powerful feat.
Great, I will do that. That makes it more reasonable but still keeps in line with the idea I had.
The only query I have with the paragon path is the level 11 encounter. By making it an implement +2 vs reflex attack it is equivalant to a weapon vs reflex. While this is okay if it is single target the attack is a close blast 3 and as such hits way too easily.
I had written it that way because that was how WotC did it for the dragonborn racial power and I was modeling it off that. It's 2d6 damage because that's what the dragon breath racial power is at lvl 11. I figured both my power and the dragonborn racial power are the same conceptually so they should be the same statistically. Does that make it more acceptable or do you still think it's too powerful? (Yes, I'm expecting that if you make a dragonborn dragon apostle you would be able to use your dragon breath essentially twice per encounter).
Onto the build itself; its AC is too low. There is already a problem with the Swarm Druid because it doesn't uses Dexterity or Intelligence as a secondary stat, in much the same way the Dragon Apostle doesn't. The advantage that the Swarm Druid has over this is that its secondary stat is Constitution, and so it has more HP, and it reduces damage from all ranged and melee attacks by an amount equal to its Constitution modifier. The Dragon Apostle is being used as a melee character yet it will have the worst defenses in the game. May I suggest that you let it use Strength in place of Dexterity for its AC? In much the same way that the Primal Druid works.
I hadn't even thought of that. Great advice. : ) I think you are talking about the primal guardian aspect on page 83 of the PHB2.
Now powers: (If I haven't listed a power below its because I find it to be okay and it can go unchanged)
Also as a general rule Implement vs AC attacks are very hard to hit with. This should be addressed so that each power is Implement vs a NAD or give the attack a +2/+3 bonus to hit.
Ok, I see that druid powers usually target a NAD, not AC. So I guess I should have my powers target something other than AC.
Claw Rake:WAAAAAAAAY too powerful to be an At-Will. Not only can you attack two creatures (which in itself is a decent power) you also get to move your speed? Another problem that you'll have with this power is that moving away from creatures provokes an Opportunity attack. This means if you'll want to avoid taking damage yourself you'll only move and attack one creature. To make this power more balanced you could make it so that you move your speed but can only attack one creature OR make it an attack where you don't move but can target two creatures. Also it's a Strength vs AC attack (see above)
I would like to note that the Scion of Arkhosia paragon path also grants a fly speed equal to your movement speed just in the form of an at-will power at level 12. So my paragon path feature that grants a fly speed at level 11 is not overpowered.
mydialcampaign.weebly.com/uploads/3/7/9/...
I had written it that way because that was how WotC did it for the dragonborn racial power and I was modeling it off that. It's 2d6 damage because that's what the dragon breath racial power is at lvl 11. I figured both my power and the dragonborn racial power are the same conceptually so they should be the same statistically. Does that make it more acceptable or do you still think it's too powerful? (Yes, I'm expecting that if you make a dragonborn dragon apostle you would be able to use your dragon breath essentially twice per encounter).
The problem is that it isn't statistically the same as the dragonborn's dragon breath. By giving it the implement keyword, it gets the totem's enhancement bonus to attacks. At paragon, this is typically +3, so the dragonborn's dragonbreath would have a +2 to the attack, while your paragon path would have an effective bonus of +5, from the power bonus and the implement bonus.
My suggestion? Either drop the implement keyword from the power and flavor it that the primal spirits manefest themselves in you for the dragon breath, or drop the +2 and leave it with the implement keyword.
I had written it that way because that was how WotC did it for the dragonborn racial power and I was modeling it off that. It's 2d6 damage because that's what the dragon breath racial power is at lvl 11. I figured both my power and the dragonborn racial power are the same conceptually so they should be the same statistically. Does that make it more acceptable or do you still think it's too powerful? (Yes, I'm expecting that if you make a dragonborn dragon apostle you would be able to use your dragon breath essentially twice per encounter).
The problem is that it isn't statistically the same as the dragonborn's dragon breath. By giving it the implement keyword, it gets the totem's enhancement bonus to attacks. At paragon, this is typically +3, so the dragonborn's dragonbreath would have a +2 to the attack, while your paragon path would have an effective bonus of +5, from the power bonus and the implement bonus.
My suggestion? Either drop the implement keyword from the power and flavor it that the primal spirits manefest themselves in you for the dragon breath, or drop the +2 and leave it with the implement keyword.
This was the point I was getting at.
Also flight at level 11 is fine.
Regarding the revised At-Will it kinda doesn't work. You do one attack, hit one creature and deal damage. Then you attack a second creature which means the first attack dealt too much damage and you'd have to go back to the first creature and "heal it" so to speak. I haven't got a solution right now. I'll edit this post when Ihave an idea.
It says "if you attack two creatures, deal half damage to each." So, it doesn't matter if you hit or not. If you choose to attack twice, you must deal half damage. Maybe I need to specify that you must choose if you are going to attack once or twice before you start.
How about this:
Special: Before the attack you shift up to half your speed
Target: One or two creatures adjacent to you during the shift
Attack: Strength vs Reflex
Hit: Strength modifier damage. If you target only one creature with the attack it deals an extra 1d6 damage.
You have to remember that adding 1d6 damage also adds things like implement focus, enhancement bonus etc etc.
Its exactly the same as the power at the moment buit is written in a way that works with the 4e rules.
@Kais3000 - Excellent, I will implement that next time I update the pdf. Thanks very much for your help. I really like that idea!
@ rampant - A good idea, but I like Kais' solution best. Thanks for the suggestion.
@Kais3000 - Excellent, I will implement that next time I update the pdf. Thanks very much for your help. I really like that idea!
I'm glad that you liked and implemented my ideas. If you have any more ideas for homebrew, I would be glad to help.
EDIT: The Dragon Apostle hasn't really got any reason to use Wisdom atm. May I suggest changing some attacks so that they use Wisdom for the attack and damage, moves like; Draconic Glare, Roar of Fury and Chromatic Breath. All of these are attacks that don't use your physical body and as such would make more sense to be Wisdom attacks.
Also shouldn't Dragon's Endless Fury's damage be Strength and not Wisdom? The attack is Strength and so it would make more sense that the damage was also tied to Strength.