My fiancee is a wonderful girl, and she deserves a nicer ring then I can afford. Please take a moment to vote for me here and help me win her a ring! Please vote for me here:
diamonds.ebay.com/BuildYourBl...d=kakash...
diamonds.ebay.com/BuildYourBl...d=kakash...
Ack. Jewelry is an interesting market. Yeah.
If your girl is the one, she oughtta understand your financial situation enough to realize what kind of ring she's gonna get. She also shouldn't give a damn what it is since it's you she's marrying and not the bling. Odds are, she won't, so it shouldn't be much of a worry. You can always upgrade her when you get a better paying job down the road - unless she's like my fiancee and doesn't ever want a different ring. I wouldn't worry about that, though. You also have ample opportunity to increase the bling with future occasions like milestone anniversaries and the birth of children. So you should be ok.
In reality, your money is much better used by saving for a downpayment on a home. My brother was recently married and he and his wife spent $20,000 on the wedding. They also bought a house. She was all for the big, fancy party but once she saw the cost, she felt bad because they could have used all of that on the house. It's a waste, really. You only have the wedding one day. You live in the house much longer. As far as rings go, you can't live in 'em or eat 'em when you're hungry. They're a silly tradition. So are weddings. My fiancee and I already have a house but our cars are both old. She wants a wedding still but doesn't want to get too crazy. Not too crazy, however, still means about $10,000. That's a car. All by itself, that's an ok used car - which is better than what she's got. To me, all of this stuff is silly. To her, it's important. So ya do whatcha can.
I'm not saying my marraige is conditional on me winning this silly voting contest. But we are trying our best to have an affordable wedding, which in NYC is unfortunately a bit more then $10,000.
She is willing and happy to marry me with the $200 ring she is wearing now. THis is about what I want her to have. I will buy one some day. But if I could win one now, it'd be ideal.
The link didn't work for me.
Are you talking wedding ring or engagement ring? My wife's engagement ring was over 20x what our combined wedding rings cost. But our wedding rings were simple bands.
And you can get very good rings for under $10k. My wife has a 1 carot, F-clarity, VSII, round cut soltaire diamond (Tiffany setting, I think) on a thin white gold band. I got it for less than $10k. You just have to find a good place. It think if I went to Tiffany's, it would've cost me over $4k more (plus their salespeople were quite annoying).
What do you plan on getting?
Actually I've been doing experiments in Clay Making and have extracted an assortment of Minerals from the Refining Process. I have a lot of Ironwhich I intend to smelt.
I suggest that you pick up a fosicking licence and you dig up a ton of River Bank and wash it through various fine sieves into a Garbage bin over and over until you get the Gold for your Girlfriend's Ring.
Take your Girlfriend out there and have her do the work with you. That way your gold and Diamond wont be from the blood of third world nations.
It will be hard. I got one Grain of Gold from a ton of Hard Clay/Gravel mix out of my own Garden. But at a thousand dollars an Ounce it is probaby worth it.
But you need 2 kidney's to perform heavy work and the loss reduces your life expectancy considerably.
And living in sin is all the rage these days and it's free. Just rent her out a spare room so she's legally a renter and you're rockin'...
Mh... I have no idea what the wife sees in me.
Seriously... what kind of money do people pay for wedding rings...?
Last I heard the traditional standard was that the engagement ring was 3 months pay. While a bit on the materialistic side, such a thing proves the man's ability to save his money for something that vaguely resembles a long term goal. The wedding ring itself, however, has traditionally been a simple band of gold.
As a side note, I'll say that I've always found gold to be symbolic of greed, and the color does nothing for me.
Why anyone who can't afford a wedding ring is getting married is beyond my comprehension...
I agree. If you want to get married, it's easy (for those who can, but that's a whole different discussion that shall not be discussed ...). I arranged my marriage in a matter of weeks, and paid a little over $500 bucks for it. It was awesome. And that was the whole "drive to Vegas and get married by Elvis" thing. Going to the courthouse would have been much cheaper, but we decided to splurge. ;)
My engagement ring was rather expensive for us at the time (the 2nd most expensive thing I owned, next to my car), but it wasn't anywhere outside of our means (we paid for it on a credit card, but paid that off in a short amount of time).
But hey, it's just different priorities. Some people put a single event/item over other things like saving or having other items. I may think you're a fool to buy a ring/wedding you can't afford, but it's your decision.
I won't help you get one, though, no matter how much of a romantic I am.
Especially not with a broken link! ;)Why anyone who can't afford a wedding ring is getting married is beyond my comprehension...
Oh, lots of reasons. Immigration, employer health benefits, filing jointly, to prove a point in a bit of civil disobedience...
All sorts of reasons to get maried that hold the cost of a ring to be irrelevant.
Why anyone who can't afford a wedding ring is getting married is beyond my comprehension...
Oh, lots of reasons. Immigration, employer health benefits, filing jointly, to prove a point in a bit of civil disobedience...
All sorts of reasons to get maried that hold the cost of a ring to be irrelevant.
Ha. That's totally not how I read that statement, but you reading makes sense too, and I agree. I was actually thinking of the "omg, I can't afford something" vs "I will buy what I can afford" vs "I will buy/want what I can't afford" mentalities.
But yeah, I could see reading it your way too. And I agree with your response too. ;)
A big, ostententacious ring gets gross in a big hurry, since unless you're independently wealthy and can afford house servants, all sorts of kitchen and household grime gets caught in it, it snags on things, etc. Good for occasional wear, but inappropriate for everyday. A simple gold band should suffice, and certainly it was good enough for me. If you want something that'll stay nice, titanium is much less expensive than gold, and still looks nice. Gold won't tarnish, but it's spendy and of limited value unless it's .999 pure(24k). If you must get diamonds, get them recessed completely into the setting, and keep them small.
-Sarena
And I'll have it engraved with "unbreakable, like our love" or something cheesy.
Because I can. And it's at least a touch more personal then a gold ring, when we both don't like gold
Why anyone who can't afford a wedding ring is getting married is beyond my comprehension...
Oh, lots of reasons. Immigration, employer health benefits, filing jointly, to prove a point in a bit of civil disobedience...
All sorts of reasons to get maried that hold the cost of a ring to be irrelevant.
Yes, I agree. Plenty of reasons.
Unfortunately, most are wrong reasons...
People should see the difference between "getting married" as in a religious church ceremony and signing a legally binding contract with the state that they are living together, which can be done for any of the above stated reasons and doesn't require a ring (or a ceremony, or a party)
IT'S A LEGAL CONTRACT.
'nuff said.
Why anyone who can't afford a wedding ring is getting married is beyond my comprehension...
Oh, lots of reasons. Immigration, employer health benefits, filing jointly, to prove a point in a bit of civil disobedience...
All sorts of reasons to get maried that hold the cost of a ring to be irrelevant.
Yes, I agree. Plenty of reasons.
Unfortunately, most are wrong reasons...
Be that as it may (and I won't necessarily agree), shouldn't it just be the people involved that get to decide what unique ways to permanetly alter their life?
Re: Marriage as a Religious Ceremony
Marriage as a civil ceremony was happening long before (and in more places then) marriage as a religous ceremony.
Be that as it may (and I won't necessarily agree), shouldn't it just be the people involved that get to decide what unique ways to permanetly alter their life?
Yeah.
I guess you're right...
But a loved one may try to counsel against such, using experience and/or familiarity, to try to "protect" or otherwise advise of problems.
But overall, I guess you are right EE.
IT'S THE APOCALYPSE!
REPENT! REPENT!
Whoa, whoa, whoa. A conservative republican and a libral gay are agreing on stuffs?
IT'S THE APOCALYPSE!
The word you're looking for is "bipartisan", not "apocalypse".
And regardless, people from most parts of the political spectrum agree on many things, it's just that things where people agree aren't as entertaining to hear about, no?
Honestly, a hugely expensive wedding ring is silly and pointless. I've seen other women with rings that exceeded the value of the3 rest of the wedding, and typically, they've worn them no on their hands, but around their necks on chains, assuming that they don't have them in a safety-deposit box somewhere so they can actually get insurance on it.
A big, ostententacious ring gets gross in a big hurry, since unless you're independently wealthy and can afford house servants, all sorts of kitchen and household grime gets caught in it, it snags on things, etc. Good for occasional wear, but inappropriate for everyday. A simple gold band should suffice, and certainly it was good enough for me. If you want something that'll stay nice, titanium is much less expensive than gold, and still looks nice. Gold won't tarnish, but it's spendy and of limited value unless it's .999 pure(24k). If you must get diamonds, get them recessed completely into the setting, and keep them small.
-Sarena
You can get your rings insured and still wear them daily. Just about all of my fiancee's jewelry is at a jeweler getting formally appraised at this very moment so that we can insure the pieces she wears. My mother has had her jewelry insured for years. There's specific policy add-ons that you buy to get your stuff taken care of. We're currently getting values on all sorts of stuff so we can make sure they're insured. You don't want to put it on your homeowners' policy, but you can insure the stuff.
As far as cleaning/snagging goes, it's not all that hard to take the ring off temporarily (if it's sized correctly) to do the dishes or clean the gutters or whatever. Most rings are not 24k because that makes them waaaay too malleable and they'll be destroyed after just wearing them for a long enough time. 14k and 10k are more common (14k is more common for wedding/engagement bands) because they're sufficiently durable to last. If your ring is snagging, you likely need your prongs repaired - and do it soon. Bad prongs mean lost stones. That's why you should try to get a certified stone, too. Just in case. Channel mounts are nice and all, but your post mounts aren't too much more catchy so long as they're properly cared for. Oh, prongs today are also typically made of platinum so they're plenty strong and durable. If any sort of prong trouble develops, your local jeweler should prove more than capable of repairing it for a modest fee. Every Jared Galleria of Jewelry also has an in-store repair shop and they'll fix anything - whether you purchased it at the chain or not. Most places also do free cleanings so it's not difficult to keep your precious properly sparkly.
My ring is actually made of tungsten carbide. Uber durable and damn near unscratchable. The only problem is that rings of that type cannot be sized. I just see it as incentive to not get fat.
You don't want to put it on your homeowners' policy, but you can insure the stuff.
Why don't you want to put rings on the homeowners's policy? That's what the jeweler told me to do when I got my wife's engagement ring.
Why don't you want to put rings on the homeowners's policy? That's what the jeweler told me to do when I got my wife's engagement ring.
The way I understand it is that if something were to happen to the ring and force you to make a claim, that claim would go on your homeowner's policy and then you'd risk having your rates raised. I'm also not sure if homeowner's covers lost jewelry/stones if the loss occurs while the piece is being worn. What I do know is that after my fiancee spoke to my mother and our insurance agent, the best plan turned out to be a separate policy. At least that's the way I remember it. I know the stuff I'm adding to the insurance needs a distinct policy becuase if I just used the homeowner's and then lost teh stuff in the woods, the coverage would not apply. Can't have that. So I'll have an inland/marine policy for all that stuff.
But good to know.
... I take it ZB has been learning about rings lately?
Not exactly. Just stuff I've picked up over the years. I've bought my fair share of shiny rocks and metals over time.
) can be helpful. Really, I just dig the stuff. I was even considering seeking certification in some of the stuff. But I'm lazy.... This conversation makes me scared to go to a jewelry store to look at engagement rings.
I find the irrationality of this fear tragic and amusing.
Edit: Hmmm.... do homosexual couples actually do the whole 'engagment' ring thing? It has occured to me that my reading of the situation seems to rest on a good bit of ignorance about how such things typically work, when they are allowed to work at all.
I find the irrationality of this fear tragic and amusing.
Eh. Take normal guy that doesn't know diddly about rings, engagement or otherwise. Add normal anxiety about getting the right ring and when to pop the question and so-on. Throw on political problems of legality and where you get it done and will it even be recognized and so-on. Add in question about if there even are engagement rings for a man. Mix liberally.
The fear is probably still irrational, but I like to think it isn't entirely beyond understanding.
Edit: Hmmm.... do homosexual couples actually do the whole 'engagment' ring thing?
As far as I know? It's not like you say "hey mom and dad, I'm a [British slang for cigarrette]!" and they say "we knew this day would come" and hand you a manual.
... Well, okay, some parents might do that, but they're better prepared then most.
As far as I know? It's not like you say "hey mom and dad, I'm a [British slang for cigarrette]!" and they say "we knew this day would come" and hand you a manual.
... Well, okay, some parents might do that, but they're better prepared then most.
...
It seems like there would be some sort of prescedent for this kind of thing, if not a well defined one. I mean, would you want an engagment ring? Would you want your SO to have one, and would it matter which of you asked? Unless one or both parties are into drag, I wouldn't have imagined it would be an issue for gay men any more than it is for straight women(the amusing part), iregardless of legal issues (the tragic part).
[If I had to suggest an alternative, I would say present a box with 2 round trip plane tickets to an appropriate municipality and a pair of identical bands when popping the question. Clearly expresses the proper intent while lampshading the circumstances to such a degree to make it memorable but not enough to subtract from the levity of the moment.]
(Not that anyone would ask me for such a suggestion. And if they did, they would be best to ignore it. Valantines day fiasco has well established me as having a sense of 'romance' very off base from that of the common people. Managed to make every person my lass works with hate me by sending flowers with an apparantly unfortunatly worded card. I thought "Thanks for the companionship, Love Shaun" was sweet. They did not agree.]
I find the irrationality of this fear tragic and amusing.
Eh. Take normal guy that doesn't know diddly about rings, engagement or otherwise. Add normal anxiety about getting the right ring and when to pop the question and so-on. Throw on political problems of legality and where you get it done and will it even be recognized and so-on. Add in question about if there even are engagement rings for a man. Mix liberally.
The fear is probably still irrational, but I like to think it isn't entirely beyond understanding.Edit: Hmmm.... do homosexual couples actually do the whole 'engagment' ring thing?
As far as I know? It's not like you say "hey mom and dad, I'm a [British slang for cigarrette]!" and they say "we knew this day would come" and hand you a manual.
... Well, okay, some parents might do that, but they're better prepared then most.
I think Chuck and Larry had rings. But they weren't really gay.
I think Chuck and Larry had rings. But they weren't really gay.
... or, ya know, real. Fiction and all that jazz.