And there are always goofy things that happen during a campaign, or game session. The situations tend to get fairly hilarious after a while.
Let's start a thread of the funniest D&D Moments that have happened to you.
I'll even kick it off with a personal story...
I'm DM'ing a group that consists of a Fighter, Cleric, Ranger, and Warlock.
This being the first game of D&D our Warlock had ever played, he constantly tells me that he "misty steps" everywhere. I "misty step" over to the bar... I "misty step" up to the room at the inn... I "misty step" while I'm dancing...
Anyway... They had just spent the good portion of a week traversing a mountain pass in an attempt to reach an opposing city on the other side. The opposing city had erected a gate at the end of the mountain pass, which is locked and closed.
Needless to say, they were flummoxed... stunned... stupified... They couldn't figure out a way to get to the other side of this gate!
I got up and got some pepsi, and made some popcorn, went to the bathroom, etc... about a half-hour later, I look across at our Warlock, and said "You have got to be kidding me."
"What?" He exclaims. "We don't have a key, we can't climb the gate, no one is on the other side... We're stuck here."
I lost it... "Oh my god! You just "misty stepped" across the whole mountain pass, and 'now' you're stuck at the gate?"
He looked at me, still confused. At this point I realized it was clearly a brain-fart and he couldn't put two and two together.
Sarcasm, being a DM's greatest ally, helped to resolve the situation. I looked at the other three players and said "Well, you guys have no choice but to head back, because Captain Incorporeal-Traveller here can't figure out how to get through the gate. You know, I don't think your character has actually been solid for more than 5 seconds since you started."
The look on his face was absolutely priceless when he realized what he had said and done...
Hope to hear some good ones! :D
I was playing this absolutely worthless half-elf bard. Her stats pretty much sucked in everything except for charisma. So she did two things in the entire play session: She cast light (I think it was on someone's weapon :D) and she played bardic music.
So round after round I said that I continued to play bardic music. My instrument was a panpipe. After a while, I was getting so bored that I decided that my bard was playing Metallica on her panpipes. :D
That was a good table distractor. We all started trying to imitate the sound of Metallica on the panpipes.
I can't remember the details, but it comes to me luring him from his post, me ambushing him, and then I did the worst thing a monk could ever do.
I purple-nurpled his nipples off!!!
His name was Worf(Sttng)
He was an angty human ranger(obvious Drizzt clone)
He had not only 2 swords but had a skeleton and claws made of adamantium(Wolverine)
He swore this was all legit with this elaborate story(too detailed to go into:rolleyes
Needless to say on our adventure we ran into a cadiableepos(spell?) And Worf goes charging in expecting and instant kill but the DM rolled the die and good ol Worf ended up getting caught in the beast gaze and was killed instantly. My companions ended up getting his weapons and other trinkets he had on him. While attempting to carry him away(after we killed the beast) I noticed that he was way to heavy for his size and the Dm then explained about his Skeleton. Well I ended up with a adamantite sword and chainmail and the sastifaction of see the guy turn beet red and leave as the rest of our group was LOAO nonstop for a good hour.
Good times
The slaves knew that if they left or tried to escape, they would be killed.
That didn't stop our "hero" from huddling them in to a corner and starting a fight with the local authorities, for attempting a "break out".
They dispatched the immediate guards, and more were on the way, so our "hero" grabs one (just one mind you) slave and the party makes a retreat.
So, to summarize...
The party intimidates the slaves, causes a local disturbance, kills some guards, steals (or he called it "freeing") a slave, and high-tails it out of the town as fast as possible. DM Note: Don't you love it when the players start crap for no reason? It's like they just don't know when to back off...
Now, it takes him some time to realize that this slave is going to be a hindrance. And after his moment of clarity, he looks at the rest of the party, and says...
"You're right, let's take him back."