Hang out with friends and talk it out. Or not. Just talk. Make jokes, remember good times, plan some new ones, etc. Adult beverages are usually involved, but be careful. Alcohol is a mood enhancer and could make everything feel worse. I'm a happy drunk 99% of the time, so it worked for me. If you get agitated, sad, uncomfortable, etc when drinking - DO NOT IMBIBE WHEN YOU FEEL BLUE. It'll just make things worse. Friends, though, always make things better.
Work out. If you really get into a workout, you'll completely forget your troubles. This is probably the easiest way I remove the bad feelings now. I may not want to work out when I start, but afterwards I feel 100% better. And things - once I remember them - never feel as bad as they did before I started.
Take a hike. Really! If the outdoors inspires anything in you (like it does for me), take a good walk. Look at all of the beatiful things around you and focus on them. Focus on the trees. Watch a squirrel find a nut and see what he does with it and where he goes. The idea is to focus on something other than what's bothering you. And it works well even when you can't quite put your finger on why you feel bad, too.
If you're religious, go to mass. If you're not, forget this one.
Talk to your mom. Sounds lame, I know, but mom or grandma always get you better than you think. Have a nice conversation. At the very least, you should be able to take comfort in the fact that your confiding in them probably made them feel good in a way. They like to know you still need them.
Write. Write down what's bothering you or something completely unrelated. Exorcise it through creativity.
Last, and most important, if you know what's making you feel the way you do and are able to - deal with it. Tackle it head on. Face the music if there's any to face. Get it over and done with. Trust me, it works. Unfortunately, with depression we don't always know why we feel the way we do. Believe it or not, some of the above suggested activites can actually help you figure that out. Once you do, deal with it. If you never do, don't worry. All things pass. That is one thing we are guaranteed in this life. Nothing - no matter how good or bad - will be with us forever. Find something that helps, do it and hang on tight. It will get better. Really.
I hope that helped (if you needed it) or answered your question in a satisfactory manner. This stuff was a real problem for me when I was younger and the above activities always helped. One might not work one day, but another surely did. These got me past some tough times. I used to cope in all the classically bad ways. Cutting, drugs, etc. They never did any kind of good. The stuff I mentioned above, though, really did. And, if nothing you do seems to work, contact a therapist. Sometimes it takes that outside perspective to get us back on track. Oh well. If you need it, best of luck! If not, I hope this was at least interesting. :D
ed in every wayI'm sure for alot of folks they deal with it in different ways.
Me, I get through it by spending time with my friends and exercising. I mean a serious workout. The adrenaline will chase away the depression, and the endorphins that come after you're finished leave you with a nice pick me up. Also, you'll look better and at least for me looking better helps me feel better. Another thing is too it gives you a very nice outlet for venting your frustrations.
I play something excessively violent and bloody. Something like Bloodrayne 2. (for the Ps2). Again.. venting.
Listen to happy music. (but not too happy.. Jimmy Buffet I think works great for mellowing out my moods)
Get some sun, even if it's effing cold outside. Sit down with your lunch outside on a sunny day.
These are some things that help me anyway.
Spend time with your friends. Kill time, doing stuff. be it gaming, talking, watching a movie or what have you.
Likewise, if you have access to video games, go blow something up or lose yourself in some other game for a little while.
Hope that helps.
I hope you break out of it soon. Depression sucks big-time, and the longer it stays around, the longer the tunnel seems to get. At least it ends, eventually. I'm on the board every day, many times more than once. Anything I can do to help...
I've fought against depression all my life. I know now that I'll never beat it; the best I can hope for is to keep it at bay for as long as possible. It always returns eventually.
I've always felt extremely isolated, even from my closest friends and family. To tell someone I'm "depressed" just seems like an admission of weakness-- I'd rather do anything than that. I tell myself, "I'm a survivor, I'm gonna make it no matter what crap comes my way." Still, it's an isolating feeling and I struggle constantly to rise above it.
When I do manage to snap out of it, I realize that I have friends and family that honestly care about me. Again, snapping out of it is the hard part though. When I'm in the deepest depression, I can't even imagine how anyone could possibly love me or how I could possibly love another. Bottom line though: It's a lie I tell myself, over and over, until I believe it-- and it isn't true.
As for medication and therapy, I've never really had much confidence in such things; YMMV of course. I was on meds for awhile but all they seemed to do was make my teeth chatter and give me brain *zaps*. I can't really say the meds helped me manage my mood any. I'm also worried that given enough time, I might become suicidal on the wrong meds (as it is now, I'm fine except in the most extreme depression-- which is rare).
Therapists are a trip. They tell me: "For one minute each day, I want you to look in the mirror and say something positive about yourself." I mean come on, get real; you want me to look in the mirror and be happy? Really? I can appreciate that these people are trained and know their stuff but it just seems unrealistic from where I'm standing.
Depression is emotional pain, pure and simple. Depression is like a cart being pulled by a horse, except you're not the horse (in your mind, you go where the depression takes you). So, fight it. Do whatever you have to, get out, make friends, have fun; don't let depression control you, no matter the cost. Easier said than done (I know); I can say from experience though: It's the only way to get better.
I coped with the loneliness and social ostracism of that day by writing an annual suicide letter. I'd keep them in secret on my computer and then read them a week later. Sometimes I'd sigh if I still felt down. Other times I'd think "Damn! I was really hitting the skids!"
I wrote similar stuff. One I remember was a story about a guy that wanted to die but could never quite get the nerve. Eventually, a shade (his soul) left his body, took the knife, chastised him for his cowardice and killed him itself. Yep, I was sick enough with myself that I had my own soul kill me just to get away from my patheticness. :D
Another saw some lovers on an anniversary with the man about to propose. He got caught staring into the fire and it took him back over all of the awful things he did to her (cheat, yell, etc). He decided to confess and leave her before she got home. Eventually, he realized that it was all things he could try to work out with her and went back. He found her wearing the ring he left behind, dead on the bed with a note near her. It was an apology for all of the things she did to him. Did I mention I had some issues back then (and now)? :P
I still have both of those stories, too.
Writing does help, BoE. Give it a go. It doesn't have to be spectacular or deep or even make sense. It just needs to help you get that stuff out or to distract you from what's going on. Maybe write something about what you're feeling now. Fictionalize it and deal with it how you'd like to in RL but are unable to. Or, failing that, write us a story about killing the last scrawny elf. I know a story like that would bring a smile to my face. :D
:hoppingma :headexploI CAN'T HANG OUT WITH MY ****ING FRIENDS BECAUSE I CAN ONLY GO TO SEE THEM ONCE A WEEK AT MOST! I DON'T THINK ANY OF YOU CAN REALLY UNDERSTAND, UNLESS YOU'VE BEEN *LITERALLY* ISOLATED FROM THE WORLD AROUND YOU! ALL I HEAR IS ABOUT HOW PEOPLE ARE EMOTIONALLY ISOLATED, BUT I HAVE A PHYSICAL ISOLATION TOO!
I'm gonna tell you something very personal but I swear it's honest truth. I spent a period of time on the streets (homeless). I fully expected to die from loneliness or isolation long before starvation or exposure.
It got to the point that I abandoned any hope of seeing friends or family ever again; in the end, I even denied the existence of God. I hated everyone and everthing. I was scared of dying alone, ending up in Hell. All I knew was that, somehow, I had to make it on my own, no one was gonna help me. I've never admitted to anyone (before now) just how desperate I truly was during that time.
Cling to whatever you have to but don't ever give up. Desperation can motivate you like few things ever can. Things will only get better. Why? Because the alternative means the end. You will survive, there is nothing that life can throw at you that cannot be overcome; not loneliness, not isolation . . . nothing.
I mean that with all sincerity.
No need for that. It's the net, man! It's all good! And you obviously needed to do that. So who are we to complain? We posted here to help. If that means "listening" to bit o' ventin', so be it. Just hang in there. That's really about all any of us can do on any given day. Hang in there. ;)
There is no emotion, there is peace.
There is no ignorance, there is knowledge.
There is no passion, there is serenity.
There is no chaos, there is harmony
flaky and corny, I know
great. just great. now I feel bad for shouting at all of you.
Don't feel bad ;). It's obvious you're in a very difficult place right now. Your situation has touched a chord in my stone-cold heart :P.
There are message boards dedicated to these type of discussions. Whenever I get to feeling like I'm the only one in the world who feels bad, I go and browse. I realize that I am not alone and that helps immensely. The chance to talk with people who have experienced the same kind of feelings that I have, went through the same things; nothing beats that.
Here's one I frequent.
Healthy living in general, and exercise and daylight in particular, can definitely help. But it's hard to get out, especially in the winter, and when you're depressed and don't have any reason for going out. Try doing it anyway, grab the warmest clothes you can get your hands on, try to find a place to walk to (top of a hill, a particular tree, whatever), and maybe promise yourself a cup of hot chocolate or tea when you get home. Your social isolation is, of course, a big problem. You talked about studying, would you mind providing a little more information about your school? It would be the obvious place to start.
As for music, it can definitely affect your mood. Happy music can help, but sometimes the right kind of sad music can help too, and the wrong kind of happy music can make things worse. If your PC has speakers, you can find all sorts of music on the net.
It would be helpful if you could explain more about your situation, the more information you can provide, the more suggestions other posters can give. And feel free to shout at people ;) I think most of us are sympathetic to your situation.
http://www.hopeline.com/
Here's a link to some depression hotlines:
http://www.spsfv.org/hotlines.htm
I hope it helps.
I'm listening to Nightwish right now on the net, but the way my internet is I haev a very finite amount of how much I can download. (watch videos and listen to music and such)
Most of my music is agressive. I listen to stuff like Slayer, Metallica, Nightwish, Powerman 5000, Rob Zombie, Eminem, D12, Korn, Children of Bodom, In Flames, Marilyn Manson, Staitc-X, Sabaton, Dragonforce, Dark Tranquility, System of A Down, and Soil.
thanks everyone. I don't feel so isolated anymore.
I lived 25 miles away from anything in a desert, which is probably less lonely than 50 miles away in a forest. (At least I had the night sky to occupy my mind, which is spectacular in the desert air.) I had brothers, but as the only girl I was left out of a lot.
Great taste in music, BTW!
Get out and do things you've never tried before. I know your contact with other people is severely limited so you'll have to find things alone. Challenge yourself. When you're learning or doing brand new things you use different parts of your brain and construct new pathways of thought.
Basically, as long as you keep thinking about how depressed you are, thats how long you're going to be depressed. Its a conscious state of mind. The other more serious kind of depression, which I don't think you have, you'll need to speak with a doctor for.
I don't always explain my ideas well. I hope that helps.
ALL I HEAR IS ABOUT HOW PEOPLE ARE EMOTIONALLY ISOLATED, BUT I HAVE A PHYSICAL ISOLATION TOO!
Imagine living in a foreign country, completely removed from everyone and everything you know. I did that, I was about ten at the time. I know what being isolated is like. You're feeling the same depression that most military brats go through growing up.
Use the time to learn to focus yourself. That Jedi code that you quoted is an excellent guide. Meditate, daydream, write, read, let your imagination run wild, dragging you hither and yon. If you focus on the isolation and depression, they'll become more intense.
Depression is like quicksand, the more you struggle against it, the more it pulls you in. Find yourself a branch, something that's anchored firmly outside to grab onto and pull yourself out.
You live in a beautiful part of California, get out there and learn your surroundings. Not just the places people live in, but the countryside. Learn what plants and animals thrive there. Learn what signs to look for to see what the weather is going to be like tommorow or the next day. Learn what rocks are common to the region. Look for fossils in places where the bedrock is exposed.
Hopefully it helps you a bit, like it did for me. At this point, I can speak eleven languages. I'm well-versed in history, literature, politics and theology. I can track almost as good as a D&D ranger and I can keep a person's attention almost as good as any bard.
Isolation leads to boredom, which leads to depression. If you catch yourself at the boredom stage and can find something that picques your interest, you'll never be depressed.
But I would not have survived long enough to do it without the love of my friends. While I may have saved my own life, they were the ones who let me get there.
Since then, I have worked on building my confidence, to know that I am more powerful than what I originally thought. I surprise myself constantly with new things I have learned about the world in the simplest of ways. I aid people, as people aided me. Anything I can do to show that I am worth more than what I believed in my darkest times.
While your depression may not have been enough to risk your life, always remember, that in everything we do there is always choice. Be confident in your power to be whatever you wish to be, whenever you wish to be it.
Just so everyone knows, I do NOT listen to Metallica's new stuff, or Rob Zombie's. My siblings are much older than I am, my sister is 25 and my brother is 28. They live really far away, but I can still contact them, which is nice. I also listen to Glenn Morgan, who makes awesome Celtic music. Very relaxing. I also listen to Rage against the Machine, since it appeals to my rebellious nature and also has political points. And it just sounds awesome. Lesse, what else do I listen to? Papa Roach, The Offspring, Slipknot, Vehemence, Alestorm, A Band of Orcs, Dethklok, Amon Amarth, and Hammerfall. And Rhapsody of Fire.
Ahhh, early in the morning, the sun is rising, the little birds are twittering their greeting to the dawn. Oh! Look! A little baby deer drinking peacefully by the water's edge. And then baneofelves awakes to pastoral beauty and turns on his stereo...
But that is quite a bit different than being isolated.
I would also recommend therapy, that can be very helpful. If cost is an issue, often times agencies or therapists offer a sliding scale for their fees that can certainly help.
I hope things are getting better.
There's the actual depression that results from a real chemical imbalance in your brain. That's the kind of thing for which you need SSRIs (Selective Serotonin Re-uptake Inhibitors).
Then there's the "well-off North American life but a few elements just aren't quite right and you're not mature enough to accept that life doesn't have to be perfect and even if you invest time and effort into something it isn't guaranteed to work" depression. This is the crap most people have. There's nothing physically wrong with them they just need to grow up.
For these people I recommend you seek equally inane solutions like zen, horoscopes, and astrology. Who knows, maybe your "feng shui" just needs to be adjusted, or your third chakra is out of whack. Seriously, if a physician and a certified psychologist have given you some ******** like "I guess you're depressed" to get you out of their hair, then don't get tangled in mine.
I'm not saying you're either of those, just that I'm leery of anyone who asks advice on the Internet to solve their depression. If you really are depressed, I recommend that you take your Prozac and move on with your life and realize that everyone has bad days and it's not the end of the world.
In my experience there are two kinds of depression, each of which has different ways of dealing with it.
There's the actual depression that results from a real chemical imbalance in your brain. That's the kind of thing for which you need SSRIs (Selective Serotonin Re-uptake Inhibitors).
Then there's the "well-off North American life but a few elements just aren't quite right and you're not mature enough to accept that life doesn't have to be perfect and even if you invest time and effort into something it isn't guaranteed to work" depression. This is the crap most people have. There's nothing physically wrong with them they just need to grow up.
For these people I recommend you seek equally inane solutions like zen, horoscopes, and astrology. Who knows, maybe your "feng shui" just needs to be adjusted, or your third chakra is out of whack. Seriously, if a physician and a certified psychologist have given you some ******** like "I guess you're depressed" to get you out of their hair, then don't get tangled in mine.
I'm not saying you're either of those, just that I'm leery of anyone who asks advice on the Internet to solve their depression. If you really are depressed, I recommend that you take your Prozac and move on with your life and realize that everyone has bad days and it's not the end of the world.
A dangerous yet understandable stance. Recently depression has become a 'buzz-word' about how to grab attention, yes. And before that it was bad to speak about ones feelings, moreso for a male. But there are still people out there who deal with problems that are far worse than most of us would like to comprehend.
Abuse, whether verbal, physical or sexual, neglect, pressure (whether from parents or others), all do strange things to a mind that is not yet properly formed. Usually only in adulthood does someone have enough experience and personality of their own to fall back on, to give them a way to know who they are.
(1) Take a step back, and look at your life. You are who you are, but who/what do you want to become? search for a goal. Then go for it.
(2) Never give up hope.
(3) I personally like the lyrics of Suncreen. lame perhaps, but most words of wisdom are ...
(4) you said you gave up on your studies. I would advice against that. Perhpas they seem useless now, but I swear to you, they'll prove usefull to you when you'll search for work ... When you're looking for a job, its horrible to realize you're underqualified ...
You are in the world. you live out in the woods. Deal.
Get outside of your head, and your anger, and listen to the wind in the trees.
Watch the clouds go by. Learn to deal with yourself, instead of escaping.
Master yourself, and you master the world outside.
Decide that you like yourself, and your situation, because it could be a lot worse.
dirtyfrank Only if you want to be. I responded a bit late and forgot to quote the original. (Never understood why Bambi for humans is a female name, but Bambi the character was a boy...)
So no worries everyone, I'm following all of your advice, and it's working out well for me! now, we can finally let this thread die. If you feel that you must post here, just let it be generic asshatery. Derailment time.
If you feel that you must post here, just let it be generic asshatery. Derailment time.
LOL I already did.
I take large quantities of Cymbalta.
It's true though. That drug makes me totally trip balls.
All I know is that Bambi is one of the most depressing Disney movies.
Because Bambi's mother died, or because Bambi lived?
It's been so long since I've seen that film. All I remember is that an orphan deer survives to adulthood at least until Ted Nugent comes around.All I remember is that an orphan deer survives to adulthood at least until Ted Nugent comes around.
Or me. ;)
(I've taken up shooting baby animals. That way I can have a delicious meal made of a helpless infant. It's just so much better that way)
it just let the f-ing thread die already! GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
(I've taken up shooting baby animals. That way I can have a delicious meal made of a helpless infant. It's just so much better that way)
You are aware that the way you've worded the thread has left it's meaning up to interpretation correct? Now that your problems have been semi-sorted out it's probably just going to be used to discuss different ways to deal with depression. On that note, my way is quite literally to tell myself, "stop being a *****, and get over it". Yeah, it's wonderfully self-deprecating to be sure.
(Foolishness, go for the big ones first so you can raise the helpless infants as your own to ride and truly create havoc. Bear mount = Awesome)
(but the flesh of the babies are so tender!!! the adults are all tough and the meat is noo good! I'll just spare one of the babies. Hmm. I can imagine it now. Zombies have taken over, I'm riding along, shooting zombies with my shotgun, smashing them with my baseball bat, and my bear tears them to shreds as it runs along. Thanks! Now I'll survive the zombie takeover that's bound to happen)
Zombies have taken over, I'm riding along, shooting zombies with my shotgun, smashing them with my baseball bat, and my bear tears them to shreds as it runs along.
Cricket bats are better than baseball bats at smashing Zombies, see Shaun of the Dead.
Cricket bats are better than baseball bats at smashing Zombies, see Shaun of the Dead.
The movie also helps get rid of depression because it is so damn funny.
And I said a METAL baseball bat. How is that less effective than a cricket bat? It's lightwieght, sturdy, and strong. Strength and speed, two traits I value in a fight. (I even broke a guy's jaw with my bat, so I know what I'm talking about!)
And besides, it's out of self defense. Zombies wouldn't hesitate to kill me, so I won't hesitate to kill them. Creatures like Orcs and Giants can be reasoned with and can become an ally against a common enemy, (those damn elves!!) but zombies cannot.
I find elves usually trump zombies, but that is because of life gain. But goblins trump all. :D
Really my zombie deck has always killed elves with no problem. It may be because the elves are hardly out in play for long. That and I can get my zombies back when ever the hell I want.
Baneofelves. Wooden bats are better than metal. It's heavier, just as fast and more durable.
And I prefer lighter weapons! It still smacks very hard! And it makes lightsaber noises if I swing it fast enough!
Do you have any old LPs from the 80's laying around? I'm thinking Ranged Attack, at least 1d6,...
I think you get a +1 synergy bonus for Lawrence Welk.
I think you get a +1 synergy bonus for Lawrence Welk.
+2 for Lee Greenwood.
Heal: LED ZEPPELIN
You should listen to some Zeppelin. It is good for getting the led out.
Try and find the immigrant song on youtube or something.
Or
heartbreaker
living loving maid
friends
gallows pole
black dog
rock and roll
misty mountain hop
four sticks
when the levee breaks
dancing days
dazed and confused
good times bad times
communication break down
and many more songs can be yours if you order now for 4 easy payments of $19.95.
Heal: Nightwish
Hurt: slayer
Heal: Slayer
:P
Kill: Slayer
Turn Undead on the beatles. (that's right, they aren't good enough to be capitalized!)
Heal Nightwish
What? I have anger problems! :D
And the bullies stopped picking on others, since they knew I'd come to get them. So I think I did more good than bad.
What can I say? Barbarian rage takes over, I go nuts.
Don't you think that it is a possibility that the reason to why people left you alone is because they though that you were an angry, unstable, loner nerd.
Don't you think that this would be something bad. I know I wouldn't really want a psychotic label to be placed on me.
Anyways, I have now realized that violence is the last answer, and that reason should be used first. Haven't gotten into a fight for about four years now.
OK, so it wasn't much of a fight.
Now I resort to words to make people cry, but that's mainly because it is too easy to do with fists.
(controversial statement about fights)
I'm not sure if there is such a thing as a 'proper' fight.
A "proper" fight is one where both combatants have an approximately even chance of winning. I've never been in one of those.
A "proper" fight is one where both combatants have an approximately even chance of winning. I've never been in one of those.
You've always got your ass kicked? I'm sorry for you.
You've always got your ass kicked? I'm sorry for you.
;)
Heal: Slayer (First saw 'em in 1996 - second concert ever. They are truly awesome.)
Stupid radio monopoly!
Well, I'm a lot better than yesterday. I don't get like this very often, once every 3 or 4 months. I was a nervous wreck yesterday, but I'm calm and relaxed today. If things go well for me, I'll be in a new D&D group.
I know you've requested that people move on from the topic, but I just saw this thread today and, as someone who has battled depression for the past 10 or so years, I thought I'd add some advice.
First, assuming you're telling the truth in the above statement*, your change in mood and the apparent infrequency of depressive episodes suggests to me that you are not suffering from clinical depression (and please understand that I am in no way qualified to make or rule out a diagnosis).
Based on your description, it seems your problem stems mainly from your isolation. Having no friends or neighbors in close proximity, not attending high school, and only being able to form and maintain relationships over the internet seems to be an unhealthy situation for a teenager to experience.
I have to wonder, is there a particular reason why your father chose to relocate to your current residence, i.e. is it job related or something similar (I assume that you had relocated since you mention attending middle school, but that you are homeschooled now)?
It seems to me that your father recognizes that something is bothering you, since he is threatening to disconnect the internet, but that he is misinterpreting the signs, perhaps believing that the internet is causing your isolation, rather than the other way around. Talking to him calmly and rationally and reminding him of all the stuff you're missing may help him realize that he needs to relocate somewhere closer to civilization.
I may be mistaken, but it seems that your parents are divorced or separated. If so, is there any way you can move in with your mother? Barring that, I definitely suggest moving in with one of your older siblings or with one of the friends you mentioned before. I realize you stated you didn't want to be a burden, but I think they would understand, and your father might be able to work out some kind of financial arrangement to help offset some of the cost of you staying with them if he is unwilling or unable to relocate. Otherwise, you should be old enough for a part-time job to help offset some of your living expenses.
Also, were you planning on attending college? If so, how far away from receiving your diploma/GED (I'm not sure which you get for homeschooling) are you? If you were planning on attending and you don't have much time left to go, the best solution may be to stay where you are and get your H.S. credits out of the way asap and then live on-campus at a community college or state university.
Anyways, best of luck to you.
Faelar
*From personal experience, I know that people who are depressed will often issue a "cry for help" to anyone who will listen, but when asked about it later, will often downplay the severity of the depression or will state they are feeling better and will then set about repairing the facade they have constructed in order to maintain the illusion that everything is okay. I blame this on the stigma against mental illness that is still extremely prevalent in the U.S.
Not a perfect one, but a good one. :P
@Cpt: Sorry Jeff. She doesn't like NASCAR guys. :P
Oh, shiz! I forgot! She lurks in the tavern from time to time! I gotta be careful what I say about her. Suzi! If you're reading this, I love you very very much, and PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!!
Honestly?....
Talk to my wife a lot and smoke medicinal herbs...
Thanks for the reply HATER. I'm better now. DF decided to rez the thread. I don't do drugs. Now, back to derailing my thread! (and don't gimme crap about CoC violations, b/c it's my thread and mommy says that I acn do whatever I want with my stuff.)
Eh, she came here one time when she was down and read PigKnight's threads, which cheered her up and i don't think she's come back since. She just lurks. She would join if she were into D&D, but she's not. Unfortunately. She won't even try 4E! (she had complaints about too many rules, magic being too complicated and such. She's just lazy when it comes to new stuff sometimes.)
Get her to lurk more often. She may decide to learn how to play dnd after a while. That is how some people have gotten in to the game.
Well, your mommy's full of ****. :P
Isn't everybody?
Isn't everybody?
No. Some people (ok, one guy) are full of broken pickle jar. ;)
amateurs I believe the jar was pickle-free at the start.
Wow. Like no seriously. Wow. Pickle jars can get pretty big....
Wow. Like no seriously. Wow. Pickle jars can get pretty big....
......and that is what we call skill.
... :DDerailment is good, but if you guys are talking about what i think you're talking about.......ugh. The thread has been tainted.
Interesting choice of words. And some of us discussing this are girls.
Interesting choice of words. And some of us discussing this are girls.
...........and enjoy it.
Anyway, I know this thread has kind of...deviated from its original premise (you heard me, you're all deviants!), but there was a post early on I thought I'd elaborate a bit with.
Though this guy's post might seen incendiary and insensitive to some (well, it is, but), he's not really wrong. A lot of people do use depression as an attention button (even a subconscious one). They'll push people away while making drama of it, get calmed down, and then be ok. There are also those who will freak out over what others (and even them, in a more lucid state) will consider "minor" problems - the type Wychlorne seems to think is uniquely "American" (it's not). It's true these aren't clinical cases - certainly still a problem to be dealt with, but not as threatening or damaging as a long-term, constant drain on your happiness (though they can be just as damaging in the short-term if it leads to suicide - but that is much rarer in non-clinical cases).
The trick is it's not so easy to distinguish between the two, especially when the person suffering knows the difference. Sadly, the most dangerous kind of depression (IMO) is the kind that doesn't make itself evident. The person tries to disguise it, puts on a smile everyday, and tells no one their problems (no "cry for help"). This can be for various reasons - I know I don't talk about it because I don't want to burden people.
In the end, it's really up to each person how aware of this they want to be. You can watch carefully for people that might be pulling away, distant, depressed - but everyone has the right to live their own lives too, and you can't watch and help everyone.
There is some evidence that deep depression (and it's unfortunate endpoint) isn't always just a "biochemical imbalance", but it can be a response to population pressures too - those that feel "weak" are self-extracted from the gene pool as weak. This isn't to say they shouldn't be helped - since when has humanity let nature take its course! - it's about realizing that there are pressures these people are dealing with larger than what it seems they're "depressing" about.
On that note - I want to say that while it's true getting depressed about "little things" as Wychlorne describes is stupid, it doesn't matter how little the thing is. If a depression lasts long enough, it gains a kind of self-sustaining momentum - the initiating event could be minor or horribly traumatizing, but either way, the feeling builds and builds on itself until it becomes a real sickness. Once it gets to a self-perpetual state, the depressed person isn't any less "valid" than one whose parents died when their dog ate their cat and burned the house down while writing a letter in baby seal blood about how it never loved them.
It's not about that event anymore - it's about the way you process your thoughts being stuck in a bad pattern.
It is extremely hard to fight, but you have to. You have to.
EDIT: This is in no way meant to downplay what you were going through, Baneofelves. IMO, everyone deserves to be happy all the time!
Interesting choice of words. And some of us discussing this are girls.
Do you have to be such a ****ing nitpicker? you know what I meant!
POSTED BY WARWEAVER
Sadly, the most dangerous kind of depression (IMO) is the kind that doesn't make itself evident. The person tries to disguise it, puts on a smile everyday, and tells no one their problems (no "cry for help"). This can be for various reasons - I know I don't talk about it because I don't want to burden people.
Wow, this is how I am till I snap. Guess I'm the dangerous kind then.
IMO, everyone deserves to be happy all the time!
If we didn't have lows then how would we know if we were happy? If we were happy all the time then our bodies would adjust and happiness would just feel normal. It would feel like nothing special and there would be no way for us to be happy (or happier). All we would have is normal and our lows. If we were happy all the time then we would always be like a drug addict on the verge of a crash.
:headexplo **** IT! I ALREADY ASKED EVERYONE TO STOP RESPONDING TO THE ****ING THREAD! JUST LET IT DIE!If we didn't have lows then how would we know if we were happy? If we were happy all the time then our bodies would adjust and happiness would just feel normal. It would feel like nothing special and there would be no way for us to be happy (or happier). All we would have is normal and our lows. If we were happy all the time then we would always be like a drug addict on the verge of a crash.
And if the crash never comes...how is that bad?
Do we need to have lows to appreciate happiness?
Do we need to appreciate it to have it?
(Honestly I'm not sure. It's a question I struggle often with when thinking about...a topic against the CoC. Starts with "R" and ends with "eligion".)
Also, I'm only continuing to post in this thread to get a reaction out of you. :P
And if the crash never comes...how is that bad?
Do we need to have lows to appreciate happiness?
Do we need to appreciate it to have it?
If the crash never comes then everything is just average because your body will get use to the constant high and eventually see it as normal and not as a high. The only choices you would then have is to feel eh or to feel down.
Yes.
Yes.
I think we only perceive it that way because we've been shaped by it.
Maybe once we get to the point where the lowest low is accidentally dropping your cookie on the ground and having to get another from the replicator, I'll agree with you. :P
EDIT: @ baneofelves: If you've ever seen my monstrous 3e/4e thread, bane, you should know these things have a tendency to expand beyond creator intent - no matter what that intent was. You should be proud!
I don't actually have an appropriate way to express emotions in actual life because everyone close to me just tells me to shut the hell up.
Works not as good as in TV but better than one would expect.
...Are you me?
Or play some D&D on OpenRPG.
Good luck.
Lesse. My dad's been putting off getting it b/c we have a low income. And we make just enough that we don't qualify for any help with it.
Social workers have sliding scales just for that, you could contact an agency and find out.