How can I handle a disruptive player? - Downloaded from the Wizards Community, all coding removed by Solauren

How can I handle a disruptive player?

Post/Author/DateTime Post
#1
Feeroper
May 03, 2010 9:38:03 So, I went to my FLGS this past weekend, bringing a friend of mine who was completely new to RPGs and D&D. We were going to an LFR game that we both registered for, and everything was going well. The game started, the group was really helpful with the newbie player and the adventure was fun.

However, and 1 1/2 hours in, another player showed up and asked what time the LFR game starts, and we said that we had already started 1 1/2 hours ago as per the advertised game start time. Upon hearing htis he threw his stuff down and began to yell about how unfair this was, and how he just wasted all this money on D&D stuff for nothing. After a short tantrum he went and sat down at a table right across from us and proceeded to complain out loud about how unfair this was, and he only needed a little bit more experience to level up.

The DM at the table must have felt guilty about it, because he decided to allow the character into the game after all. I was a little hesitant about it based on this guys reaction to hearing the game started earlier, but it was not my decision to make, so we allowed him in.

Anyway, immediately after starting, this guy would not listen when it wasn't his turn, and would talk to another player at our table about other stuff. He would get up and walk away from the game and return later, meanwhile, we all had to wait around for him to return (The DM eventually just put him on delay when he wasn't around for his turn). He started doing these weird fake punches to the players next to him to be finny (unfortunately i was one of them, but i refused to put up with it and warned him to stop touching me). He would talk very loudly during role playing moments and story sections. After about 1 hour he started to sigh loudly and asked the DM to just stop the game now and give us the experience points so he could go home.

To top it off, he would make bizarre and silly checks out of the blue - the worst of which was "I'm going to roll a check to see if I ****" he rolled the check, got a 9, and proceeded to describe a disgusting outcome. I was rather livid with this player by the end of the game, and that's the problem, the DM didn't put up any fuss about this player. He let him distract everyone, and didnt pipe up when he was makeing lewd comments, he just let him finish what he was saying, and continued to run the game. I was tempted to walk away from the table, but I thought that would be poor etiquette, and unfair to everyone who WAS enjoying the game.

I was rather agitated that this was my friends first experience with the game as well. I tried explaining to him afterwards that this wasn't normal for the game and more just a problem you might face when playing with a random group of strangers. He still insisted he had fun despite everything and wants to continue thankfully.

Anyways, that was my horrible experience this past weekend. Im signed up for another LFR game next weekend, but I am hesitant to go if that guy is going to be there. I was wondering if there is anything a player can do about a situation like that short of just abandoning the game. Are there any RPGA routes or guidelines I could take/use to help with a situation like this? There were a couple really good players there this weekend that I enjoy gaming with, so it would be a shame to quit the LFR games altogether at this location.

Has anyone else had similar problems like this?
#2
fugacityfixyoursite
May 03, 2010 11:15:07 Your DM should have his DCI number. As a player I believe you could file a report on him. Sorry I don't have time to research this further for you, hopefully others will chime in with more specific information. I think filing a complaint might be done through the DCI system (which unfortunately is a bit hard to navigate). Customer Service might be able to help you as well.

This person sounds terrible and I hope he becomes banned from public play after a few collaborating reports.

Edit: Your DM and the Event Organizer (may be the same person) should also submit reports.

In any case, that bit about masturbation should get him tossed out on his ear by the store owner and not invited back.
#3
KarmaInferno
May 03, 2010 12:22:42 Ask the player privately to please stop being disruptive. Ask if he is aware that the RPGA has ethics and conduct rules for playing in RPGA events.

If you to not feel comfortable doing this ask the event organizer or the store owner to do this.

The store owner can ask the fellow to leave and not come back, if it comes down to it.

As mentioned above, you can also have him reported to the RPGA central HQ, but in the immediate now the person who has authority is the store owner. I don't know many store owners who will tolerate a disruptive person bothering their other customers.

-karma
#4
tirianmal
May 03, 2010 12:46:28 Ditto. I'd talk to the store owner about having him banned from the store. I'd also make a report about him to the RPGA/DCI. He is not someone that needs to be playing with/plaguing the rest of us.

Edit: I'd also talk to the GM. They need to grow a pair and be willing to deal with disruptive players since it is the rest of you that suffer when they do not do so.
#5
Feeroper
May 03, 2010 12:58:28 Thanks for the replies everyone!

I did politely ask the trouble player to stop interupting play and keep the lewd comments to himself, but he would just ignore me, or say "but Im just joking around".

I did not talk to the store owner or the DM about it afterwards though - I got wrapped up in trying to reassure my friend thatthe game was not normally like this. If the guy does show up next week, i will definetly say something to the store owners as I dont think we should have had to put up with that.

The DM we were playing is a nice guy, but somewhat timid in that regard, so it was disconcerting to see him allow that behaiour. I would be tempted to talk to him, but this week comming it will be a different DM, so hopefully, it will be someone else with a little more authority.

I will have to look into reporting the player, but I dont know what his name is, so if he shows up next time, Im gonna try to get any necesary info.
#6
_Mithreinmaethor_
May 03, 2010 13:15:10 I suggest duct tape and a cattle prod. Oh and extra batteries for the cattle prod.
#7
darrell_uk
May 03, 2010 15:46:52 It may be worth warning this coming week's DM about the player and what happened on this occasion, so that he/she has an advance warning. Even if it is just before the session starts. Likewise I would speak to the store owner regardless of whether this individual shows up, you may find that the person is already on a warning or similar.

Beyond that, can I say that you are a much more patient/forgiving person than I. Yes, I would have asked him politely to shut up, but if I'd been ignored, or had to put up with someone like that at a table I was sitting at, I would have thrown them out of the game myself, and the shop, physically...
#8
Uthrac
May 04, 2010 8:29:14 Ditto.

It sounds like you already tried the "high road" (i.e. Talk to the player.). Next step is to escalate by reporting to DCI/RPGA and the store owner if it's a problem in the future.

Pack one of your favorite board games next time. If the problem player shows up again, pull the DM aside and politely explain the issue. Either the DM will deal with it, or you and you friend can excuse yourself from the game, notify the store owner of the situation, and play your backup game.

Good luck!
#9
dkay807
May 04, 2010 8:52:24
To top it off, he would make bizarre and silly checks out of the blue - the worst of which was "I'm going to roll a check to see if I ****" he rolled the check, got a 9, and proceeded to describe a disgusting outcome.

Did anyone check this guy's character sheet? There's no way he could get that outcome on a 9. For most of us, it's 15+ at best. I would add "cheating" to the list of grievances.

#10
matteblack
May 04, 2010 10:32:49

Did anyone check this guy's character sheet? There's no way he could get that outcome on a 9. For most of us, it's 15+ at best. I would add "cheating" to the list of grievances.

Perhaps there were situaltional modifiers.

In all seriousness, sounds like that guy was way beyond any line for acceptable behavior. RPGA doesn't allow it and the no store owner should.

#11
crimsonsky
May 07, 2010 13:28:53
Perhaps there were situaltional modifiers.

It sounds like not only way he trained, he most likley had Skill Focus to boot.

Post/Author/DateTime	Post
#1 Feeroper May 03, 2010 9:38:03	So, I went to my FLGS this past weekend, bringing a friend of mine who was completely new to RPGs and D&D. We were going to an LFR game that we both registered for, and everything was going well. The game started, the group was really helpful with the newbie player and the adventure was fun. However, and 1 1/2 hours in, another player showed up and asked what time the LFR game starts, and we said that we had already started 1 1/2 hours ago as per the advertised game start time. Upon hearing htis he threw his stuff down and began to yell about how unfair this was, and how he just wasted all this money on D&D stuff for nothing. After a short tantrum he went and sat down at a table right across from us and proceeded to complain out loud about how unfair this was, and he only needed a little bit more experience to level up. The DM at the table must have felt guilty about it, because he decided to allow the character into the game after all. I was a little hesitant about it based on this guys reaction to hearing the game started earlier, but it was not my decision to make, so we allowed him in. Anyway, immediately after starting, this guy would not listen when it wasn't his turn, and would talk to another player at our table about other stuff. He would get up and walk away from the game and return later, meanwhile, we all had to wait around for him to return (The DM eventually just put him on delay when he wasn't around for his turn). He started doing these weird fake punches to the players next to him to be finny (unfortunately i was one of them, but i refused to put up with it and warned him to stop touching me). He would talk very loudly during role playing moments and story sections. After about 1 hour he started to sigh loudly and asked the DM to just stop the game now and give us the experience points so he could go home. To top it off, he would make bizarre and silly checks out of the blue - the worst of which was "I'm going to roll a check to see if I ****" he rolled the check, got a 9, and proceeded to describe a disgusting outcome. I was rather livid with this player by the end of the game, and that's the problem, the DM didn't put up any fuss about this player. He let him distract everyone, and didnt pipe up when he was makeing lewd comments, he just let him finish what he was saying, and continued to run the game. I was tempted to walk away from the table, but I thought that would be poor etiquette, and unfair to everyone who WAS enjoying the game. I was rather agitated that this was my friends first experience with the game as well. I tried explaining to him afterwards that this wasn't normal for the game and more just a problem you might face when playing with a random group of strangers. He still insisted he had fun despite everything and wants to continue thankfully. Anyways, that was my horrible experience this past weekend. Im signed up for another LFR game next weekend, but I am hesitant to go if that guy is going to be there. I was wondering if there is anything a player can do about a situation like that short of just abandoning the game. Are there any RPGA routes or guidelines I could take/use to help with a situation like this? There were a couple really good players there this weekend that I enjoy gaming with, so it would be a shame to quit the LFR games altogether at this location. Has anyone else had similar problems like this?
#2 fugacityfixyoursite May 03, 2010 11:15:07	Your DM should have his DCI number. As a player I believe you could file a report on him. Sorry I don't have time to research this further for you, hopefully others will chime in with more specific information. I think filing a complaint might be done through the DCI system (which unfortunately is a bit hard to navigate). Customer Service might be able to help you as well. This person sounds terrible and I hope he becomes banned from public play after a few collaborating reports. Edit: Your DM and the Event Organizer (may be the same person) should also submit reports. In any case, that bit about masturbation should get him tossed out on his ear by the store owner and not invited back.
#3 KarmaInferno May 03, 2010 12:22:42	Ask the player privately to please stop being disruptive. Ask if he is aware that the RPGA has ethics and conduct rules for playing in RPGA events. If you to not feel comfortable doing this ask the event organizer or the store owner to do this. The store owner can ask the fellow to leave and not come back, if it comes down to it. As mentioned above, you can also have him reported to the RPGA central HQ, but in the immediate now the person who has authority is the store owner. I don't know many store owners who will tolerate a disruptive person bothering their other customers. -karma
#4 tirianmal May 03, 2010 12:46:28	Ditto. I'd talk to the store owner about having him banned from the store. I'd also make a report about him to the RPGA/DCI. He is not someone that needs to be playing with/plaguing the rest of us. Edit: I'd also talk to the GM. They need to grow a pair and be willing to deal with disruptive players since it is the rest of you that suffer when they do not do so.
#5 Feeroper May 03, 2010 12:58:28	Thanks for the replies everyone! I did politely ask the trouble player to stop interupting play and keep the lewd comments to himself, but he would just ignore me, or say "but Im just joking around". I did not talk to the store owner or the DM about it afterwards though - I got wrapped up in trying to reassure my friend thatthe game was not normally like this. If the guy does show up next week, i will definetly say something to the store owners as I dont think we should have had to put up with that. The DM we were playing is a nice guy, but somewhat timid in that regard, so it was disconcerting to see him allow that behaiour. I would be tempted to talk to him, but this week comming it will be a different DM, so hopefully, it will be someone else with a little more authority. I will have to look into reporting the player, but I dont know what his name is, so if he shows up next time, Im gonna try to get any necesary info.
#6 _Mithreinmaethor_ May 03, 2010 13:15:10	I suggest duct tape and a cattle prod. Oh and extra batteries for the cattle prod.
#7 darrell_uk May 03, 2010 15:46:52	It may be worth warning this coming week's DM about the player and what happened on this occasion, so that he/she has an advance warning. Even if it is just before the session starts. Likewise I would speak to the store owner regardless of whether this individual shows up, you may find that the person is already on a warning or similar. Beyond that, can I say that you are a much more patient/forgiving person than I. Yes, I would have asked him politely to shut up, but if I'd been ignored, or had to put up with someone like that at a table I was sitting at, I would have thrown them out of the game myself, and the shop, physically...
#8 Uthrac May 04, 2010 8:29:14	Ditto. It sounds like you already tried the "high road" (i.e. Talk to the player.). Next step is to escalate by reporting to DCI/RPGA and the store owner if it's a problem in the future. Pack one of your favorite board games next time. If the problem player shows up again, pull the DM aside and politely explain the issue. Either the DM will deal with it, or you and you friend can excuse yourself from the game, notify the store owner of the situation, and play your backup game. Good luck!
#9 dkay807 May 04, 2010 8:52:24	To top it off, he would make bizarre and silly checks out of the blue - the worst of which was "I'm going to roll a check to see if I ****" he rolled the check, got a 9, and proceeded to describe a disgusting outcome. Did anyone check this guy's character sheet? There's no way he could get that outcome on a 9. For most of us, it's 15+ at best. I would add "cheating" to the list of grievances.
#10 matteblack May 04, 2010 10:32:49	Did anyone check this guy's character sheet? There's no way he could get that outcome on a 9. For most of us, it's 15+ at best. I would add "cheating" to the list of grievances. Perhaps there were situaltional modifiers. In all seriousness, sounds like that guy was way beyond any line for acceptable behavior. RPGA doesn't allow it and the no store owner should.
#11 crimsonsky May 07, 2010 13:28:53	Perhaps there were situaltional modifiers. It sounds like not only way he trained, he most likley had Skill Focus to boot.