First off the inside cover, and the cover.... yeah... that alone puts hints at where the systems focus is in regards to women.
I've read reviews of the system and I'm curious.. just how bad does it get?
okay the -one- "not negative" trait so far that has been exhibited (I'm reading the Anakim or whatever the bloody hell they are called) trait this system has not exhibited yet is different stats for male or female characters. (Ie - to physical stats if your a woman..... I'm sure it'll come up though after reading the "introduction")Be thankful Astrids that D&D is not even close to this bad... *and I'm not even finished reading the first race yet*
I have to wonder, how did they not get sued straight to Gamer Hell though? Kobold and Bugbear are some of the races by the way (and no it doesn't even look like a Kobold)
up to traits of an anakim.... wow this is so immature.....
Gamer Gods help me.. I don't know if I can actually finish reading the races section...let alone what is going to come after.
I need more of an understanding of total FAILURE...
So far it's not as sexist as Sultry Teenage Super Foxes was... but again I've not left the race section...yet.... so many races.... that are the same race... w......t........f.
Just got to the gender section..... and the ability modifiers are there......
apparently women aren't capable of equal physical fitness (which is different than str)
nor str (which that part is at least -somewhat- accurate)
worse at math, spatial int,
worse Drive (whatever that is)
but are more bodily attractive, facially attractive (Yes they are two different stats!)
more intuitive, more reflective, and better language skills.....
btw over all stat wise they are vastly inferior to the male counter parts by 30 percent.... whatever 30 percent in this system means.
Just through numbers alone this system betrays it's sexism.
And I just read the first part of the Gender description... wow... I don't think I've ever seen anyone slam women so hard in text form before, in such a short time span (and that's only counting this page not the introduction that I read earlier!)
Ibut are more bodily attractive, facially attractive (Yes they are two different stats!)
It's so you can play that "butterface" you've always wanted to and have it mechanically represented. :P
actual rules for -each foot size.- (as if that was some how important anyway)
Charts for what kind of hair you have... what the hell were they smoking?
FACIAL FEATURES CHART... you don't even get to pick this based off your score? WTF
apparently only women can suffer from nymphomania ..... Nymphomania only affects females , and is characterized as an uncontrollable sex drive. This requires them to solicit sex from and inquire about the size of the manhood of, every man they meet who has even slightly above-average Charisma.
I knew I'd find another sexist bit eventually!
Nonsensical bit.
They say "men and women prefer women with a medium bust size" yet Medium bust size has no attractiveness modifiers... yet C has only +1d0... and D +2d10... proof that the authors of this book have never actually seen real women's breasts before.... (B-C is the average size right? I know sure as hell it ain't Ds... though with as fat as Americans are getting that might be the norm now)
Nipple length.... by the way apparently Nipples only affect how attractive a woman is.... and yes there's a chart for this too.
Not only is there ******l circumference but ******l depth charts as well.... What I can't say that word? It's the female below the waist naughty bits. there. And they even have
circ and depth for -infant- females.Hymen Resistance... nuff said
Pregnancy... 1% at best chance per screw. Obviously someone failed biology class.
There's actually rules for menstruation.... :wtf:
Stat section.... dear god..... no sense... at all....no damn sense.
Where's some more sexism... I'm over due.. it's been a whopping 4 pages since I've seen something sexist. However it's been 0 pages, and 0 words since the last attack on my intelligence based Reflex Defense.
I've read reviews of the system and I'm curious.. just how bad does it get?
It should probably be pointed out that FATAL isn't the Satanic Bible of RPGs that gamer folklore sometimes makes it out to be: just a miserable and mind-numbingly dull pile of racist, misogynistic, homophobic garbage. Honestly, wading through the thousand pages full of juvenile charts isn't worth the effort.
It should probably be pointed out that FATAL isn't the Satanic Bible of RPGs that gamer folklore sometimes makes it out to be: just a miserable and mind-numbingly dull pile of racist, misogynistic, homophobic garbage. Honestly, wading through the thousand pages full of juvenile charts isn't worth the effort.
So far it's the worst thing I have ever read.
The crime and punishment part is sometimes sexist (and ageist) as well, albeit quite funny. I have to admit, the following often gets a laugh out of me.
For most crimes --
Elf, Dark: Younger criminals are forbidden sexual relations for 1d10 years, while older criminals are beaten to death by their immediate family.
Elf, Dark: Younger criminals are forbidden from playing pranks or making music for 1d10 years while older criminals are starved to death.
Example for Homosexuality --
Human: The criminal is fined 1d100 s.p.
Kobold: Female homosexuality is legal and encouraged. Male homosexuality is a crime. Slaves are dismembered and burned. Peasants, serfs, and nobles are castrated and become slaves for 1d100 years. Royalty disappears without a trace and no character speaks about them again.
Please tell me this is not a real game.
It can't be real, can it?
I can't imagine anyone but a crazy kid wanting to play something like that.
I have difficulty imagining that very many parents would purchase such a thing for their children. I have an even greater difficulty believing that kids who actually do work for their spending money would waste it on such garbage.
Why would someone pay for this when you could get garbage for free on the internet? Is it a game only found on the internet?
BTW, how did the OP gain a copy of this to read? :P
BTW, how did the OP gain a copy of this to read? :P
I can not disclose that information. ;)
And yes it's real... my god... why does it have to be real.
There were actual people that played this game... at the very least it was playtested. I feel bad for those people.
and apparently according to middlefingerevolution there was a forum for fans of this horrible game... and apparently this forum actually had members.
However, the world is a big place so I guess that I should not be surprised that there are a good number of those out there who might actually enjoy such a thing.
I appreciate the response. Thank you.
And by love, I mean loathe with the searing light of ten trillion burning suns.
Why would someone pay for this when you could get garbage for free on the internet? Is it a game only found on the internet?
Yes. There was an attempt to clean up the text a little so that it might appeal to a slightly wider audience, but the game has actually never been published in a printed format: the PDFs are all that there is to it. Basically, it's a rather nasty and poorly thought out homebrew.
And by love, I mean loathe with the searing light of ten trillion burning suns.
That would be my one reason to read FATAL, when I need to let out just loathing at something best do it something like that.
It is like the opposite of watching a depression film or depressing piece of music so you can let yourself cry :P
Yes. There was an attempt to clean up the text a little so that it might appeal to a slightly wider audience, but the game has actually never been published in a printed format: the PDFs are all that there is to it. Basically, it's a rather nasty and poorly thought out homebrew.
Thank you.
This seems to be a more believable explanation.
It would appear that the game is very low budget. Hopefully, this would mean that there is very little art work in it.
Am I correct?
Or is there a lot of art work that is both poor in its context and in its quality?
It would appear that the game is very low budget. Hopefully, this would mean that there is very little art work in it.
Well, the production values are amateurish in every possible respect. This is the kind of a game that some misfit teenager might slap together in an attempt to shock his parents, except that the writer appears to be completely serious about his claims of "historical accuracy" and such. Just read his "rebuttal" of criticism over at the RPGnet Wiki, with its famous line about how FATAL can't possibly be a "date **** RPG" as described in a review since there's no mention of dating whatsoever.
I found links that spoke of an original review which had been pulled by RPGnet but gave a link to where it was still supposed to be posted. No luck there either.
I found what was supposed to be a rebuttal of the review by the creator. His color code for separating out the individual quotes annoyed me. I couldn't read very much.
However, it appeared that he attacked the reviewers for not making rational and logical deductions. My impression from the little I read was that they had no intention of spending the time necessary to conduct an actual review because they believed it was that poor.
Then, he appeared to follow the same line of illogic he accused them of doing while masquerading it as a rational dissection of their review.
I couldn't finish reading the rebuttal. I just closed the tabs I had opened to different links.
I am signing off now because I think need to go take a shower.
I tried to read FATAL. After reading the sexist gender penalties and stuff, I skipped ahead. I saw the chart for foot sizes. I skipped ahead. I kept seeing stupid **** like that. I then deleted the PDF, and cleansed my mind of the horror of FATAL. I'm pretty sure I saw a chart in there that was describing how far your butthole can be stretched.
I can't quite remember if it was that or something else. I know it was disgusting, but I'm pretty sure that that's what the chart was describing. (I read the PDF about a year ago, so my memory is a bit rusty.....thank god)
I'm not sure if I can even call it an RPG. With the way it's all presented, it feels more like a ****-trainer for men, to be honest. (and that's the impression I got just by skimming it!)
It's a soft core porno for those crazies that can't talk to girls without asking if they can sqeeze.
If they're truly crazed, they wouldn't ask. ;)
This all looks like some sort of joke. A joke someone spent a lot of time on, sure. There's no way the guy was serious. He had to have made it just to get reactions like this. I mean, the stuff is more funny than offensive. Well, it's funny because it's so offensive. It's got to be a joke. It just has to be a joke. It has to ...
It's a **** trainer.
And it has way too many unneeded details. I don't even think about the size of my D&D character's feet or nipples. If someone asked me, I'd prolly just say 'the average size for his species' and then move on to something important.
And give the person asking me a weird look.
Why is nipple size and foot size and stuff like that even important? FATAL has more rules than 3E!
There's also a chart regarding Exercise. I **** you not. What the crap.... the Ethics and Moral rules.... wtf.
They make Alignment look good. By the way the example they use is a guy lusting after a woman and doing the deed or not doing the deed with her.
I just stumbled on the Crit rules... oh...my .....god.
Listen to his advice. Stop reading it, for your own sake.
Just how messed up are the crit rules? I never got there.
oh exploding anuses.
vomitting, defectation, urination...
super defecation, broken limbs, more broken genitals.
by the way folks Urination is a skill.
Random magical effects I'm not going to read all of these.. some gems include Caster immediately grabs nearest female's breasts. Caster gives birth to a clone through their ****** (female lower naughty bit) or manhood. Everytime the caster casts a spell, chunky defecation runs down the caster's leg. Target's manhood/breasts grow 4d12 inches and may be used as weapons.... *head desk*
Target's genitalia are swapped with random party member.
The "Legal system" of the world apparently **** isn't really a crime and 80 percent of the male villagers in a small village **** the women on a daily basis.. most of those are gang rapes. And they are rarely punished.
Ah here we go.. more gems include, if a pregnant woman is crit in the groin you get instant bloody miscarriages, baby comes out with the weapon, pubic bone is shattered as well, -50 percent attractiveness. (and again no instant death here) while men folk are apparently only 20 percent less attractive when their groins get crit... nasty male effects include.
testicular dismemberment, manhoodremoval, "head" removal.... all of this only 20 percent....
It's really not -a- crit chart but several... and they are so pathetic that I can't believe anyone even made this. Let alone... expecting people to use it.
Again alot of these aren't even biologically possible, and someone obviously failed biology class. (and life but I'm trying not to be too hone.....I mean mean here.)
Just...stop. PLEASE STOP. I'm begging you.
Not on my knees, though. I have no idea what effect FATAL has had on your mind.
(:P)
I'm looking for my flamethrower as we speak though... I have the need to Purge the Unclean.
Why are you still reading this? It's torture.
I know, but I at least had the sense to stop when I saw the **** chart! I'm relaying this stuff to my bro. He wholeheartedly agrees with your opinion of FATAL.
Why are you still reading this? It's torture.
It's for the greater good. Maybe my suffering will lighten the atmosphere around here.
I am taking a break for today.... my mind.... it feels like gelatin. I have to stop.... god I skimmed and I didn't even dent half of this damn book.
I have to play Cygirls before I do anything -fun- lest whatever I play or do that is fun be contaminated by this.... this..................................this...............thing.... I can't just ... just can't find a word to describe it.
It's the most sexist, inane, misogynist, poorly constructed thing I have ever set my eyes upon. I wish I could say simply that it is only offensive to women... but this...abomination is offensive to all forms of sentient life equally. Even if it only tries to be offensive to women. It's worse than the worst. I can't believe this thing exists.. even as my mind reels from the Forbidden Lore contained within the binds of this pdf. Even as more and more proof of it existing comes to my attention. It's like my brain just refuses to acknowledge that this is infact Real.
Anyways, burn that ****ing book. You have suffered enough.
Man, if I was you, I'd prolly clear my mind of it (which you already plan to do) and then get laid. Several times. Every day. For a week.
Wife: What the ****? How does that even happen?
Man: *staring at the book, dumbfounded* That's what is says! See? I rolled a 24 on the sex chart. Look.
Wife: *looks over chart* ....If you get a 27, your dick turns into a Pirahna? What the ****? Burn this book!
Can not hit the broadside of a barn with one gun.. yet with two she's deadly as all get out.. For some reason she knows not what melee combat is (quite literally folks she has -no- melee attack) Game's needless to say easy as pie, graphics are well um.....dated (even by 04 standards) Her animations are odd. Yet she can shoot behind her, shoot blindly over cover... (any of this sound familiar?) all quite fluidly. So we die eventually and decide to try out "disc 2" which is really "game 2 for character 2"
Disc 2, is about the other chic on the cover. *Here I give points for originality* she's the melee monster, I say this because she kills pretty much anyone in 1 hit. Yes you read that right.... We got to a point where we are not quite sure what to do, (literally nothing works at this point, can't place the bomb wtf? in the spot that they tell you too. double wtf!) so we quit playing... Pain.... eww... Let's not speak of disc 2's graphics which were some how worse than disc1.
an excerpt from my Myspace review of Cygirls
I will be playing this game -again- because I don't want FATAL contaminating something I'll enjoy. While I'm at it I might even watch Spiderman3 afterwards to ensure that I have something to gradually get the filth off of my soul from.
Micha I think you will also need some rekindling in your faith in humanity after knowing a person wrote that. So I give you this: http://www.tweenbots.com/
Wow that made me smile. Thanks Sigil. You are now one of my forum heroes and now I won't have to use my flamethrower on a real live person my faith in humanity is infact restored. (The robot is adorable by the way) I'm bookmarking this story right now.
Hey, not all rap is like that. MC Chris does nerd rap!
And don't forget "White & Nerdy" by Weird AL. I think that one hits most of us where we live.
As for the FATAL book. Burn it. I've never read it, but I've heard tentacle hentai is kinder to women than FATAL.
Not all rap is like 2pac and Snoop Dogg.
apparently only women can suffer from nymphomania
Actually, this is technically true. There is a different name for the male version (undisciplined jerk is the one I use, but I know there is a proper name). The hormone/brain chemistry mess ups required to cause it are supposed to be slightly different between genders. (This info comes from a dictionary, not psycology textbook, so I'm not 100% I've understood this right)
Must now bathe in broken glass to purge myself from agree with something in that freakish book.
(I don't even know my own nipple size, why would I need to know that of my character?)
There is a different name for the male version (undisciplined jerk is the one I use, but I know there is a proper name).
You should keep your sexism to yourself.
Also, it is satyriasis.
I've skimmed through it quickly and it looks like it is mostly charts and tables. A lot of the females are nude with the clothed ones wearing things that are sexually suggestive. There are some pictures of nude men too.
Not only is there ******l circumference but ******l depth charts as well.... What I can't say that word? It's the female below the waist naughty bits. there. And they even have
Hymen Resistance... nuff said
Do infants get a bonus to Hymen Resistance?
Honestly, I would rather take a Mii-Goo on a date to see Battlefield Earth (the extended version) after a dinner of broken glass, rubbing alcohol, salt, and lemon juice than view that horrible book again. It haunts my dreams with it's bizarre and irrational critical hit tables and it's rampant misogyny. Trying to use it to lighten the load of your fellow forumites is a noble but doomed enterprise. You will find yourself clawing your eyes out to avoid looking at that damned tome by the time you finish reading it, and that probably still won't stop the images contained within from assaulting your mind.
But it is not too late-turn away from that foul work and come back to the light. If you're still feeling like sacrificing your sanity for the good of Astrids parlor after you've regained the sanity points you lost reading F.A.T.A.L you can give World of Synnibar. It's still insanity inducing, but at least your friends here on the boards won't have to worry about you trying to summon cthulu or something to put the universe that produced this piece of crap out of it's misery.
I would end this warning with a comment about how Dante's "Abandon all hope, ye who enter here." is appropriate for anything having to do with F.A.T.A.L besides burning it, but it's completely wrong. If satan does exist, I don't think that he'd want this abomination or the sick bastard that wrote it anywhere near his domain. Hell, I'd want to place this PDF and Byron Hall (the creator of F.A.T.A.L) in a non-space filled with unimaginable horrors so that his work would not be able to torment any more good-natured gamers.
My god...that would make F.A.T.A.L and Byron vestiges.... meaning that they could be contacted...
I CAN"T ESCAPE FROM IT!!!
*Head explodes*
Azazel: Holy crap! *Runs to tell Lucifer*
---
Azazel: Yo, Lucy! That FATAL guy is here! He got killed by a femanist!
Lucifer: Turn off the lights! He might not think we're home!
Azazel: ...
It's like going to see the dead kid in Stand by Me. You know it's gonna be bad, but you just can't look away.
OK. I've had enough. Someone tell me where I can view this train wreck.
It's like going to see the dead kid in Stand by Me. You know it's gonna be bad, but you just can't look away.
Yep. It was horrible.
Just like the journey in Stand by Me, now that I've finished it, I have the wisdom to realize I never should have done it to begin with.
I have also traced sacred runes of warding on two sheets of paper, which is taped to the sides of the monitor, which will then be burned when I am finished for the day.
http://bbs.stardestroyer.net/viewtopic.php?t=93087
third post in this thread has the pdf.... I warn you it is not for the Faint of Heart, nor for those who are suffering from a Crisis Of Faith in the gaming gods.
Do infants get a bonus to Hymen Resistance?
Nope.
Let us start today with the "Skills" section... er charts...whatever.
By the way folks the book starts not with a table of contents like pretty much any other book known to man, but with a description of "what is an Rpg" which has clearly been misconstrued and misinterpreted to mean whatever the author says it means. It really spends most of it's time talking about Sex, Violence, Sex, Violence, Sex and ****. Then it also talks about how "historically accurate" it is. (Guess what it isn't.)
More post coming.. I'm really trying folks.. really. I'm going to sblock parts of this, by section as to save room on the forum page.
Show
So the skill section starts and there's a human skull ghosted in the background. How cute. Is the author trying to warn you away? It wouldn't surprise me in the least. By the way each chapter has some kind if image distractingly ghosted in. Some chapters have a nude woman... then there's the "natural substance" which has a pot leaf ghosted in... yeah pot... in the most "accurate rpg ever to medieval Europe ever!" Pot wasn't in Europe back then.. so yeah... that should give you an idea of how "accurate" to history this "rpg" is.
then there's the "natural substance" which has a pot leaf ghosted in... yeah pot... in the most "accurate rpg ever to medieval Europe ever!" Pot wasn't in Europe back then.. so yeah... that should give you an idea of how "accurate" to history this "rpg" is.
Umm... actually, there's evidence of cannabis usage in Europe at least as far back as the 3rd millennium BC. FATAL's claims to historical authenticity are horse-dung, but using a picture of a cannabis leaf is not really an example of that.
OK, carry on.
EDIT: Also, why has this been moved out of Astrid's?
I have no clue.. considering it's about built in system sexism ultimately. And how it affects women.
EDIT: Also, why has this been moved out of Astrid's?
Because the topic is completely unrelated to D&D, presumably. But hey, now that you're here, why not check out some of the other threads? This forum could always use more traffic.
(This was the first time that I've actually posted outside RPG General, and the thread gets moved right back here. Figures.)
Yeah, and there's so many stats you are very likely to forget at least two of them during the character creation process.
Also, if you forget about age and gender modifiers you have to go back and adjust everything on every damn table again. I am making a couple characters so I can see it for both how bad it's fluff is and it's mechanics and I forgot about adjusting the height and weight for gender. Before hand the female bugbear was very tall, quite heavy, not very attractive but very strong. After adjustments she became about average height with about average to below average weight. She also became quite attractive and average in strength. Basically by adding in gender modifiers she took a 180 degree turn mechanically.
The mechanics seem to be about pigeon-holing people into stereotypes. There seems to be almost no character choice in character creation.
I tried to scream, but only blood came out
Nothing came out when I screamed bane. My blood was frozen in place from the horror.
That doesn't seem all that surprising... Hell I"m still trying to comprehend the things I've read, and make sure that they are right before I would even attempt to make a character.
The mechanics seem more frustrating than the fluff is funny. You have to roll (10d100/5-1) for each stat. Basically you are finding the mean for each stat and your core 5 stats are the mean of 4 sub stats. It is way too much work to do without a dice rolling program. Also for Freak of Nature you roll something like 6d100 and if you get a 1 you are a Freak of Nature and then roll from the table. I for kicks just assumed one of my characters was a Freak and so I rolled from the table. I rolled up Hermaphrodite and since I'm making 2 characters I rolled to see which one would be the Freak. The guy is now the Freak. If he would have gotten one of the strength effecting ones then he would have had a strength penalty similar to that of a woman. Can you imagine a woman with such a penalty with their -30% gender penalty to strength on top of that.
From the D&D viewing forum block about Astrid's:
A frank and friendly discussion on the subject of women and gaming, inspired by Shelly Mazzanoble’s book, Confessions of a Part-Time Sorceress: A Girls Guide to D&D
But, from KGM's welcome thread in the Parlor:
Astrid's Parlor is an evolving community for those interested in gender in D&D, dedicated to the discussion of gender issues related to D&D. It is our hope that these discussions will encourage more players of all genders to come to the table, and will help make the gaming experience a better one for everyone.
The previous is specifically related to 'women and gaming' while the new is specifically related to 'gender in D&D'
At least that is my take on it. I didn't see any posts on it in the VCL request thread, so it looks like Webster decided himself.
Here is his post:
Webster's post
So, I don't know why he did it without a request unless he did not want such a thing to be in his forum.
You should keep your sexism to yourself.
Also, it is satyriasis.
Calm down, I thought it was obvious that the post wasn't 100% serious.
People don't be mad at each other! Be mad at F.A.T.A.L
If Webster moved it to avoid contaminating Astrids I apologize to him.
People don't be mad at each other! Be mad at F.A.T.A.L
Even the 'moved' links have disappeared. WTF?
I still don't understand character creation (or rather why it is the way it is).
Also, Brawling is not in the combat section yet is the best way to do damage to someone.... It's a skill apparently.
What.....the ****. STOP READING IT! STOP! PLEASE!
Please listen take this advice, people.
I didn't and now my eyes won't stop bleeding.
It. Gets. Worse. Seriously, you may think it can't, but it can.
You get charts from man on man sex and the enjoyment of the parts, you get charts for how much damage you take on during the act, if your sphincter goes back to original position or not... It's just... Sex. The whole book, it's just that. I can't really fathom that a human being wrote all that, i think it must have been some kind of sick joke from an otherworldly being or something...
Seriously, it's not worth it, to read the thing. The guy who wrote it even defends the system, seriously, google it. He goes out of his way to defend the historical acuity of his work and cites some obscure historical reference. He says all his data is correct, and that the game was created to represent on the most accurate possible, the reality of a medieval setting.
It's mind-boggling, it's insane, it's a brain-**** on meth. It's Dirty Harry with his .44 on your head, over, and over, and over again. You'd be best served watching the same Friends episode for the rest of your life.
http://web.archive.org/web/20080208091645/http://atrocities.primaryerror.net/fatal.html
And here is the REBUTTAL of said review:
http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/FATALReviewRebuttal
I wish y'all the best of luck.
I'll try to be as coherent as I was nearly a year ago today when reading this thing. Hypothetically I'm more jaded and cynical (and thus less scarrable by this evil thing), with the slew of attrocious movies I've seen over the last year under my belt. I've reread this thread twice now.
So I hopefully have the feeling that I had back then.
I'll fire up the pdf shortly. I want to eat dinner first. That way I don't lose my appetite while doing this.
But honestly, do you think it can be played at all or it's just a bunch of crazy charts and rules?
Um. Shitfire and damnation.
I will say I would rather watch Revenge of the Fallen. Providing I was allowed to talk during the movie.
I just fired up the pdf folks. Those of you with a lesser stomach may wish to avert your eyes for a few moments.
I forgot just what a train wreck this really was. I mean I read my own damned thread but I still didn't grasp. This.
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Fatal Games Where the Dice never lie. That might be true, but the system itself, and everything written in this book? Yes could very much be a lie.
So last time I talked about in this starting section about the Introduction, so we will skip that, because my initial review is more than accurate enough. However there was a funny bit that I missed the first time. They talk about how it is technically impossible for a fantasy game to be historically accurate. Then of course they go and talk about how they will list sources at the end of this book. (I bet yeah right)
Then they of course tell you if you have any helpful suggestions to email them @blerdeblerdeedeedee.com
I will skip on their discussion of what is Roleplaying, save for I missed one bit. They talk about freeing a female prisoner, and that you could choose to **** her, kill her and feast on her still warm innards as one of the many choices you can make in a roleplaying game.
So add Cannibalism to the list of things that will undoubtedly be handled in a juvenile manner.
We then move on to a discussion about the materials needed for this game. In which they actually succeed in describing what you would need to play this game, dice, graph paper, paper, a copy of the rule book etc. (Wow you know I'm fetching when this is one of the better points of this book. They talk about the different sided dice, and where to find them.
They even talk about another book that you will need if you are playing a Priest character called Neveria... which folks if I can find it (because you are all sick sadists that would want me to read it and review it too) I will and review it when the time comes. Wait a minute. This thing is 1,000 pages (and some change if memory serves) and it needs ANOTHER BOOK just to play it?!
Shitfire. Oh well. I'll find it later. I promise. If it can be found. Please dear pantheons (I don't care which) don't let this thing be out there.... I'll be such a good forumite if this thing doesn't exist!
Okay, we are to Terminology. And...
I'm sorry I'm better now. Okay okay Now I'm better. I'm sorry this next bit is just too funny that I can't believe they seriously put this in.
Ahem "Since it is impossible to be correct grammatically and avoid gender bias, Fatal Games sacrifices grammer to avoid a bias. Throughout this book pronouns, such as 'they' 'their', and 'them' replace 'he' 'she' and 'his' and 'her's unless more appropriate."
I'm sorry my sides hurt. I'll stop laughing at it I swear.
Are ya'll sure you want me to go on? I know I don't but I said I would do this thing.
They talk about character creation here and how that you won't use every chapter in this book to create a character (oh thank god for that right?). Ah shitfire. They talk about how you should go through this book page by page to make sure you don't miss anything.
****! why!
Sorry.. are my tentacles showing? *puts them away* You never saw that.
OH MY GOD. There was character generator made for this. (They say the fastest way to make a character is using the generator) It's listed as being on the now very much defunct website. However! I'm sure I could find it... did ya'll just volunteer me again?
Thanks guys. I love you too.I'm sure I covered this before but if I didn't it uses something called the Mean System. The mean system basically uses an average of stats combined together (and skill modifiers) in order for you to get the number you need to add to the dice you roll for a given task.
Oh now here's the disclaimer. As if you couldn't guess from round 1 of this. F.a.t.a.l according to it's author is meant for adults only. It presents you with mature situations, obscenities, it's lecherous and violent. They talk about how the only reason they use obscentity is because of it's prominent place in history and do their damndest to make it seem like they are really only going to use it sparingly. Since you know. The
only wanted to sparingly overthrow heaven.next they talk about Sex, in the same fashion as they do obscenity.
Then Killing.
Oh at least they are smart enough to consider **** as not being sex, or a sexual situation! (really I just reached out there AGAIN to find a compliment) And they of course follow it up with the same "hesistant to use it" disclaimer.
Okay I'm done. Tommorrow or next post. Which ever comes first. The Table of Contents!
I cowered in a corner for three hours afterwards. That book is disturbing and outright wrong in every way.
was there cowering as you read it? or was it pure shock?
Pure shock mostly. I re-opened it the other day and had to put it down again by the third table.
I'll get to crackin on the Table of contents soon. and whatever comes after lol.
The Table of Contents.
This might be one of the most singularly sane things in this book. It's almost a breath of fresh air after reading that Introduction infact. It's almost as if the author knew that you would need a respite against the coming Mind Screw. That or the author felt that not even HE could add insanity to a Table of Contents.
So let's see what the TOC covers shall we?
Sorry (puts tentacles away)Show
Chapter 1 Race and Gender page 9
Chapter 2 Body
Chapter 3 Abilities
Chapter 4 Disposition
Chapter 5 Mind
Chapter 6 Sociality
Chapter 7 Occupation
Chapter 8 Skills
Chapter 9 Equipment
Chapter 10 Combat
Chapter 11 Magic
Chapter 12 Spells
Chapter 13 Magic Items
Chapter 14 Treasure
Chapter 15 Conducting The Game
Chapter 16 Advancement
Chapter 17 Natural Substances
Chapter 18 Warfare
Appendix I Character sheets
Appendix II Spell Lists
Appendix III Random Magical Effects
Appendix IV Phobias
Appendix V Ingredients
Appendix VI Aedile Characters
Appendix VII Names
Index
References
Chapter 2 Body
Chapter 3 Abilities
Chapter 4 Disposition
Chapter 5 Mind
Chapter 6 Sociality
Chapter 7 Occupation
Chapter 8 Skills
Chapter 9 Equipment
Chapter 10 Combat
Chapter 11 Magic
Chapter 12 Spells
Chapter 13 Magic Items
Chapter 14 Treasure
Chapter 15 Conducting The Game
Chapter 16 Advancement
Chapter 17 Natural Substances
Chapter 18 Warfare
Appendix I Character sheets
Appendix II Spell Lists
Appendix III Random Magical Effects
Appendix IV Phobias
Appendix V Ingredients
Appendix VI Aedile Characters
Appendix VII Names
Index
References
In this next paragraph it is here that we learn that it is most important to talk with your Aedile (your Gm/ST/Dm for those of you just joinin the thread.. it's not your wackjob crack ho of a lover)
about Race, because if the Aedile chooses, it can be Random. Yeah that's right Random. There's a possibility with this system that you don't even get choice over your race. Infact no one gets a choice, is a possible. Just trust the dice.... right.
Apparently random races is more realistic because no one in reality gets to choose their race.... (really, so the author knows about the generation of souls and if they have a choice or not as to what race they are when they go for a new body?)
But AFAIR, even when your race is random, you're allowed to choose which sex gender you want to play. Pretty freaky actually, you risk having to play a 7 ft tall half-fiend (anakim) who'll be forced to try to have sex with all babies within 37 ft, or cause nearby people to spontaneously start to poop, but being forced to play a woman is unreasonable.
Then again, I actually think the male anakim will have an easier time socialising with the NPCs of FATAL than a woman, regardless of race. Unless of course she's rolled so high on her charisma that she causes wetness or something. It's been a long time since I've read the book, and I never made it all the way through.
Speaking of said book, I lost my PDF a while ago, would you mind sending me a link?
I suppose I should resume my work.... but but starcraft.... something good... wholesome.....good.... crap. *has the shakes from starcraft withdraws*
So child-molesting half-demons are ok, but invisible wee buggers are not? Maybe, ... but that's just pure speculation... because they could escape being raped by the Anakim if they turn invisible.
Cheers,
Captn M.
Let's start with the very first thing that appears from whence I left off. The picture..
We have a picture of what one can assume is going to pass for Races in this game.
Now, the art is subpar (I can't post it because that would violate the CoC). The shading is non existent. The proportions are waaaay off.
To give you an idea just how far off, the dwarf's head is small enough that the Anakim's **** is almost as large -soft-. The dwarfs anatomy is also extremely small for the size of the dwarf.
The Kobold... yeah that's not a Kobold I don't care how much Byron Hall tries to sell that on me. (Future conjecture coming I can assure you)
We see one picture of a troll... if you can call that a troll and I suppose "mercifully" we are spared the sight of his **** (unlike all of the other males assembled.) The females in this picture are laughable at best. One is clutching her **** as if trying to hide it but making no effort to hide her breasts, and the dark elf... is just drawn so badly you can't make anything out. Which tells me the 'artist" here is so bad at anatomical studies that he couldn't draw a **** given how badly he draws ***** (male reproductive organ) I could believe it.
Now that we are away from this Awful Picture. (****. Where is the brain bleach)
We are in a section talking about the Format of each race. Heh they try to tell you that the section for each race is going to describe to you is each race in general terms. That the info in this section is Incomplete. Yeah folks that's right Failure to Self Contain your god damned Rules in one place. And you thought I was going to go even two paragraphs without failure being present?
Oh, and in addition to a lack of info here, where each race falls into society is described in Detail IN YET ANOTHTER CHAPTER. Ya'll starting to see why that ToC is so important for this gawd awful book? Because I wasn't kidding. You'll be cross flipping. ALOT.
They tell you that the complete info about stats is in the stats section but the Racial Specific entries to stats are listed here. (DUH You didn't need to explain that you doofus)
Oh in a twist of hilarity this is where you get the AC in this game described to you for the first time.
Those of you that read part 1 of this might remember when I cracked jokes about them ripping off of D&D? Yeah this is the second time it becomes readily apparent. Current Armor. Yeah you just read that. It's Abbreviated form is CA. Think about that.
Oh each race affects this, they also each affect LP (life Points. I think you can guess what Life points are), physical description. Oh yeah Disposition Modifiers. Yeah that's right your race Mechanically Forces you to play given Ethical types. I bet ya'll are knowing where this *** is going.
(puts tentacles away) As if that wasn't laughable enough each race also affects your Personality in Mechanical Methods through Temperment Modifiers. Languages duh standard fare. Oh Occupation is also a mechanical thing that races modify. Each race also gets +s and -s to various skills, religion they cite Neveria as the book you will need. And yes I swear I'll go hunting for it eventually.Names : names supposedly are sourced from historical sources and those sources are allegedly linked in appendix 7. Wanna bet we get Turdmunchers as a name or something that translates to it? I bet we do. Oh yes sirs and madams.
Well it's time for the first Race. I'll do it eventually.. Right now I want to eat, sleep and bathe... twice.
So, um, I have a theory about FATAL. Which means that I have come up with an idea that makes its existence less inexplicable and depressing. It's gotta be a piss-take. It must be an extended, warped satire of the creepy gamers we all have to deal with. I think that whoever wrote it just encountered one too many Catpissmen and made this game "for them." I can see a mad scientist sitting down at his typewriter and saying, "Alright you ****s, this is for you. You want mechanical differences that reflect that "But men and women are different!"? Fine! Here's mechanics drawn from every bit of sexist pseudoscience out there. You think that dealing with **** childishly makes you edgy? Here ya ****in' go! You think that people who like simple mechanics for small things are just too stupid to do math? Do the quadratic equation to determine your HP! Do you like talking about how well your orc is endowed compared to humans? Roll for it! Roll for every damn detail of appearance that you obsess over!
The game just fits so well to the creepy little corners of geekdom, but turned up to eleven. It's just easier to believe that it's a joke gone too far than the life's work of the king of catpissmen. I don't even think Byron Hall exists. He must be some Boratlike persona out of control.
I mean, seriously, check the last page of the PDF and tell me if the last phrase is "The Aristocrats!"
I refuse to believe that somebody could create this monstrosity in earnest.
So, um, I have a theory about FATAL. Which means that I have come up with an idea that makes its existence less inexplicable and depressing. It's gotta be a piss-take. It must be an extended, warped satire of the creepy gamers we all have to deal with. I think that whoever wrote it just encountered one too many Catpissmen and made this game "for them." I can see a mad scientist sitting down at his typewriter and saying, "Alright you ****s, this is for you. You want mechanical differences that reflect that "But men and women are different!"? Fine! Here's mechanics drawn from every bit of sexist pseudoscience out there. You think that dealing with **** childishly makes you edgy? Here ya ****in' go! You think that people who like simple mechanics for small things are just too stupid to do math? Do the quadratic equation to determine your HP! Do you like talking about how well your orc is endowed compared to humans? Roll for it! Roll for every damn detail of appearance that you obsess over!
The game just fits so well to the creepy little corners of geekdom, but turned up to eleven. It's just easier to believe that it's a joke gone too far than the life's work of the king of catpissmen. I don't even think Byron Hall exists. He must be some Boratlike persona out of control.
I mean, seriously, check the last page of the PDF and tell me if the last phrase is "The Aristocrats!"
I refuse to believe that somebody could create this monstrosity in earnest.
.. I I don't want to say this.
But Scientology is an actual Religion... if that abomination can exist, surely in all of the population of the world there can exist someone that seriously made this... this thing in earnest.
Cheers!
Captn M.
I agree with Cpt Micha... seems to me that this thing comes straight out of those dark creepy little corners of Geekdom we don't wanna be associated with.
Cheers!
Captn M.
Sure blame the geeks...because geeks are all repress rapist...and popular kids never do any wrong. Personaly this might be a work made for the Kennedy family.
I wonder if this is the same guy who wrote the worst, most offensive RPG of all times...(though FATAL has tied it. But there was a game...I can't remember the name of it...but the game was inter city RPG...races include...a bunck of actual racial slurs...like the N word...and the S word...etc...oh and ****s. And from what I understand it just got worse from there.
Anyway onto the next installment of the review.
We are going to do just one race today, because races are long from what I remember and I do want to read something that doesn't make my brain bleed before I go to work.
The Anakim. I suppose it's in alphabetical order at least. Yay.
Anakim are this world's half fiends/half celestials. They go by some other names such as nephilim (
), annukai, zuzim, and a couple others.Remember folks "it's not every day that fiends mate with human women so anakim are rare" And yet fairly easily you can roll one up on the random race chart
Most anakim are the result of an incubus or succubus shagging a mortal. These anakim are called Cambions. Oh and they dont't typically show any signs of life until they are seven years of age. Once again, few Anakim exist.
Wait. Full stop. Reverse course Mr. Sulu.....I want another look at that sentence. "Often times Anakim don't show life until they are seven years of age". Yeah that one. What the
(puts tentacles away) okay am I the only one questioning the Internal Logic here? I mean really does the kid age like normal but are catatonic, or is it a still born baby for 7 years? Inwhich case wouldn't that make Anakim basically undead abominations? (in addition to them being half fiends mind you) If it's a still born until 7 years have passed how the **** does it get out of the ditch that'd be dug for it's fetus body? What if it's fetusness is burned (as per some cultures found in that time period)? Does this mean you have to reroll your character?
What the hell.Maybe the next paragraph will be more enlightening. Cause really I don't know which to assume here.
**** they don't say. Infact we go straight to stat modifiers. Yeah that's right we haven't had stats explained to us at all yet, and already we are getting modifiers. No I'm not going to fire up a second window of this damn thing to flip to the stat section. So at this point let's presume for a moment you are new to RPGs. Up till now you've read that Rping is apparently about raping, ****ing and murder. And now suddenly after two paragraphs you just got these foreign numbers thrown in your face.
So what are you going to do here? Probably crack open the TOC and try to find the stat section and then come back to this section later. (hopefully after you've gotten an understanding of the system.. yeah good luck with that.) Meaning that Races and gender should NOT have been even close to the first thing you should be reading about with this system. So this book is assembled out of order.
Sub Ability modifiers for the Anakim : Strength +100, Hand eye cooridination -30, Agility -25, Reaction Speed -20, Language +5, Math +5, Analytic +5, Spatial +5 (I so wanted to read Special there), Drive -5 (no I still don't know what this is. We'll all find out together), Intuition -10, Common Sense -20 and Reflection -10.
Did you also notice how this is in neither Alphabetic, nor Numeric order? Numeric order would at least sort your stat bonuses either highest to lowest, or lowest to highest. But no.
Base Current Armor 11, Base Life Points 27. Okay let's pretend for a moment that Life Points work exactly like hp (they do and don't. And at the exact same time the number here doesn't even matter but you'll discover that later) I will give them one prop here over 3e. They at least figured out that your starting hp should be over 15. So even Byron Hall in some ways is more intelligent than Monte Cook was.
Physical Description: the menfolk are about 8' tall females 7'6" yeah that's right they dwarf Yao Ming. Suck it.
Apparently they are likely to live much longer than humans providing they don't meet a premature death. Oh and they have 1d10 traits. Which are then determined by rolling a d100 and consulting a chart.
Disposition Modifiers: Oh oh Happy Fun Times. -25 Ethicality (yeah that's right Byron Hall is so awesome he can make up new words!), and -50 Morality.
Temperment Modifiers -25 to Sanguine, -25 to Melancholic. So they aren't prone to being content, but they also aren't depressed? Don't these two negate each other? When someone says they are Melancholic that means they are sad yes? When someone says they are Sanguine that means they are Content. So if you are prone to neither doesn't that you know make you normal?
Sociality: The human mother of an Anakim (yeah that's right folks human mother. It's always a human momma. Can we say some hawt Futanari* fantasy is going on here with a Succubus and human woman? ) dies during child birth. They don't have their own society and thus apparently this forces them to try to live their lives in secret among humans. They also apparently don't get along well with others.
Language: Sapian .... ....... you know I'm going to need that one explained later too. Oh and if they are both Good and have access to Education they can learn Underworld! Now I don't know about ya'll but when I think Underworld, Good doesn't spring to mind very readily....
Occupation: Remember Occupation has rules in this system if I recall correctly and they affect other things so this is important. Anakim can have almost any occupation. Most popular though are Bandit, Beserker, Gladiator, Mercenary, Ruffian, Slave, Slave Trader, Sorcerer. Anakim begin work at Age 10.
Full Stop. Okay Now I'm really ****ing confused
(doesn't even bother hiding the tentacle mutations anymore. Let the Inquisition come) So is this ten years after they show signs of life? Or is this ten years after birth? Meaning their 3 year old ass is joining the work force? And some of ya'll were thinking "there's no way Micha is being serious about how bad this system is"Skills: Brawling +3, Intimidation +5, Mangling +3, Sexual Adeptness +5, Trickery +3, A bonus weapon (specific) and Wrestling +5.
So basically Anakim are Super Awesome at scaring you into letting them Sex you up, or Mangling and Wrestling you to get Sexed Up.
Religion: Anakim may have any religion, though commonly they are foreign to notions of worship or venerate fiends. Just not going there.
Names: Anakim often have human names as the mother names them at birth, or if she died immediately after the culture the Anakim grows up in names them.
Okay it's time to pick out the dumbest Traits on the Anakim chart. Prepare to be dazzled by Failure.
Trait Number1. Super Fertility basically. Anyone the Anakim (if male) **** gets pregnant. Immediately. So you know this brings up another question I have immediately, are Anakim kids, Anakim too? if so I sense a rather painful and torturous way to go about killing female adversaries. If a woman you get knocked up with the first male thing you ****. Do female Anakim die if they birth anakim kids? If so, then that's a rather cruel way to kill the moron playing a female in this system.
Trait number 3. Bestial lust. Basically the Anakim once perday can force someone of the opposite sex to **** their brains out. Can only be used in one on one situations. God help em if the Anakim has trait number 1 eh? This has to be the first Save or **** I've ever seen in an RPG. Well done Byron. Well done.
Trait 8 Okay this one is just scary for the implications it has like "why did the author even think about this" level. The Anakim causes babies to scream when present. Touching the baby causes a 75% chance to Urinate, 50% likely to defecate and 25% likely to urinate.
Trait 14 Oh yes I remember this one now. The Anakim is addicted to Vaginal/Penal Carrion. Once per week unless the Anakim makes a Drive check he will kill someone of the opposite sex and feast on their naughty bits.
Trait 24, Causes humans within 1foot to desire Anal Sex according to their sexuality.
25 Blood for sexual fluid. Men ejactulate blood, and female vaginal secretions are blood. So basically it's like being hit in the kidneys really hard and the nuts, and for girls it's like being a walking period. Yuck. Minus 1d10 to Sexual Adeptness.
Trait 40 The anakim is accompanied by the odor of sex which extends 1d6 feet.
Trait 41, the Anakim can cry at will complete with tears.....
Trait 48 automatically evaporates water 1d10 cubic feet per round.
Trait 72 The Anakim may fart as loud as Thunder. That's right. Thunder Farts. I'm not even going to post the effects. I think it speaks for itself.
I could have sworn there were modifiers for the Anakim's naughty bits. I bet we find those later in the book. I mean seriously what the ****. Those were just the most especially stupid. All of the traits for the most part are fairly retarded but those? Take the mother effin cake. I can't for the life of me figure out what this guy was thinking.
Oh and I had an epiphany. This guy is probably a fan of Terry Goodkind. Or hell maybe they are best friends, because as you read this pdf the more and more it starts to sound like a Terry Goodkind based RPG.
*Futanari a type of hentai/fantasy where the girl has a Dick. Usually a very big Dick.
As for the rest:
F.A.T.A.L. f'tagn!
F.A.T.A.L. f'tagn!I really can't even see perverts playing this game...I think the people who have got it...as pretty much got it just so they can see this car wreck for themselves. This is a form of rubber necking.
I find myself drawn to reading your reports about the game...just to see how bad it can get...mmm I might have to start hiding those tentacles.
And I understand that with Mutation comes Purging.
It is for the good of mankind that I expose the corruption and driving force of The Arch Enemy in our beloved hobby. The better we know our enemy the better we can fight it.
Oh and I had an epiphany. This guy is probably a fan of Terry Goodkind. Or hell maybe they are best friends, because as you read this pdf the more and more it starts to sound like a Terry Goodkind based RPG.
I can't believe I'm saying this, but The Yearded One (he shaved his head, but the man still has a yeard in spirit) is not that bad compared to this stuff. The barbed mantackle of the demon in book 2 comes close, but not quite.*
Maybe Goodkind just has editors and that's all, though.
[sarcasm]P.S. Thunder Fart FTW! That's a-gonna be a spell in my games for sure. Everyone will know how mature and gritty my setting is.[/sarcasm]
*Incidentally, if Goodkind's ever at a con near me, I wanna stick several nails in a marital aid and troll him by asking him to sign it.
I'll do the next part sometime this week.
I am sorry that I have neglected this this... atrocity. I created a Doom Truck to transfer the Darkness, hate and mutations to save my soul.
I have more or less succeeded. I will cover the Next Race, soon. I think I will resume my PreWork reviews Monday.
*takes in a breath* Hopefully this third time will be the end of this case study of madness, this endlessd depravity, and insanity.
Hopefully we can at least gain some glimmer of understanding behind the subculture that this was surely aimed for.
More importantly perhaps we can gain a grasp of a true Arch Heretic... the ultimate madman in the hobby. Who's name is whispered in panicked whispers, and bewilderment. What could have driven this man to something so insane?
I think the first step in understanding this system, and an angle that I failed to see before is the man behind the madness. In the next few posts, I'll be attempting to analyize the mind behind it all, given the context we have to work with, and whatever adhoc research wikipedia and other sources can back it up with.
This must be finished. For The Good Of Mankind.