Things that mean 'You die. No save.'

Post/Author/DateTimePost
#1

makuya

Feb 06, 2008 19:09:59		I wasn't sure where to post it, so I'm trying here.

Here's the first one to get started: Lava/magma/superheated rock.
#2

necroticbanana

Feb 07, 2008 2:57:27 		Riding a flaming meteor into the earth. No Save

Riding a flaming meteor into earth wearing a cowboy hat. +1 to saves. lol

oh and BTW
Ba weep grana weep nini bong to you too
#3

argulfraster

Feb 07, 2008 11:46:31 		"Hey look, it's Chuck Norris!"
#4

threefists

Feb 07, 2008 17:35:07 		Any enemy NPC that requires five minutes for the DM to fully describe.

Dryad Ninja that spams her blinding/death abilities to their full potential.

Avalanche of jagged rock/ice.

PC doing a 'Take 20' check over the mouth of a guyser.
#5

jaiadrottsingr

Feb 08, 2008 19:37:56

Biting any part of a still living dragon. Particularly in the front.

#6

squirrel_lord

Feb 19, 2008 18:30:07 		When you see the DM pull out a book you've never heard of, you know bad things are going to happen.

I terrorize my players with this all the time. Sometimes I just want to read something while their arguing. Of course, if anyone ever accuses me of trying to scare them, I find the nastiest things in the book and throw it at them (Sometimes literally. Flying catapults suck for players.). :D
#7

threefists

Feb 20, 2008 8:06:43 		Any enemy that involves the stacking of every Core and Homebrewed template known to man. It may have only 1d12 hit-points, but it'll have AC in the hundreds and dozens of attack patterns....and good luck getting through it's spell resistance!

I did this once, just for a lark. Stacked Half-Dragon Half-Fiend Half-Troll Half-Undead templates, then added a Monster of Legend and a few other babies....you've never seen a 1 HD Goblin give the PCs so much trouble, and this was at level 15.....>.>
#8

trappedslider

Feb 28, 2008 15:57:04 		DM before game starts : "Do you all have oyur share of the pizza money?
Players "No,sorry..."
DM: "Fine lets jsut start..."
#9

melpomene

Feb 29, 2008 13:25:43 		14. Rocks fall. Everybody Dies.
15. Multi-Headed Advanced Half-Fiendish Rust Monster of Legend. You probably won't die, but that's so much for your stuff.
16. Inevidables with shotguns. (An in-joke. I think.)


Cookies for anyone who knows 14.
This?

jaiadrottsingr

Feb 29, 2008 16:47:13

Cookies for anyone who knows 14.

This?

#11

terjon_of_the_blue_rose

Mar 01, 2008 21:52:00 		Necromancers whose minions have weapons with the merciful enchantment. No... Wait... That's "You die. No ressurection."
This?

melpomene

Mar 04, 2008 19:46:44



This?


Well, it wasn't what I was thinking (having never seen that before and not really understanding it), but it's worth half a cookie anyway.
#13

jaiadrottsingr

Mar 06, 2008 21:50:14

Well, it wasn't what I was thinking (having never seen that before and not really understanding it), but it's worth half a cookie anyway.

That's JKR, saying that she's out of ideas, and can't think of something for the 7th book, so Rocks Fall and EVERYONE DIES!

#14

melpomene

Mar 07, 2008 12:56:53 		OIC
#15

namer_and_shaper

Mar 09, 2008 9:36:33 		Pelor sits on you. You die. No save.
You fall into the Para-Elemental Plane of Acid. You die. No save.
Batman has had time to plan. You die. No save.
You accidently walk in on the Parliment of Black Wyrms. You die. No save.
The Grim Reaper says "HELLO.", You die. No save.
The floor was a illusion, you fall into a pit of spikes a mile below. You die. No save.
You have a heart attack. You die. No save.
#16

jaiadrottsingr

Mar 09, 2008 18:04:52

24. You fell asleep and a medic used a defibrillator on you.
25. You sit in the electric chair, and pull the switch.

#17

mr_seth

Mar 13, 2008 19:12:06 		26. "Three tarrasques fall from the sky, landing directly on your head."

27. "Ah, your character is a gungan...?"

28. "Ah, your character is an ewok...?"

29. "Ah, your character is a prepubescent podracer who was born of the manifestation of the force...?"

30. "Ah, your character is Burt Reynolds...?"

31. "You teleport into a 100-foot thick adamantine wall. Better take the time to aim yourself properly in your next incarnation."

32. "Orcus appears in front of you. He looks... irate."
#18

melpomene

Mar 16, 2008 21:32:50

24. You fell asleep and a medic used a defibrillator on you.
25. You sit in the electric chair, and pull the switch.


Those would deal, at most, 10d6 lightning/electric damage.

Also, the afformentioned heart attack puts you at 0 HP, then -9, then dead. Potentionally a PC could save you, assuming they had the right spells/skills.
#19

jaiadrottsingr

Mar 16, 2008 21:54:48

Those would deal, at most, 10d6 lightning/electric damage.

Also, the afformentioned heart attack puts you at 0 HP, then -9, then dead. Potentionally a PC could save you, assuming they had the right spells/skills.

A defibrillator while conscious, and an electric chair would both cause a heart attack. An electric chair is designed to solidify the blood, and instantly kill, through the form of a massive heart attack. Quite frankly, there is no way to survive. It's that big of a heart attack.

#20

necroticbanana

Mar 16, 2008 22:58:18 		being an electrician i was always miffed by the electrocution rules in D20 modern. They dont take into account AC/DC. while a car battery isn't as much of a shock as say a tazer, it's DC (direct current) which, in a nutshell means it causes yer muscles to contract and locking you in place as it sends a steady arc of electricity to your heart. As opposed to AC (alternating current) which goes thru in waves allowing you to pull free. Car batteries are very, very lethal, and only do like what? like 2d4 or something silly? I belive the electric chair is also DC so that pretty much goes without saying, but then again theres nothing more dramatic than surviving the chair...especially when the poor sap was innocent all along....

Or the BBEG pshyco ax murderer thats been terroizing the PCs since 1st level looks up at the audience with smoke pouring out from between his teeth and locks his blood-shot eyes with the your character and just grins.
#21

melpomene

Mar 17, 2008 12:27:59



A defibrillator while conscious, and an electric chair would both cause a heart attack. An electric chair is designed to solidify the blood, and instantly kill, through the form of a massive heart attack. Quite frankly, there is no way to survive. It's that big of a heart attack.


10d6 is a lot of electiricty damage. And that damamge can be reationalized as blood solidifying, hearts failing, etc. But if you can be knocked down with wave after wave of wizard-lightning, a little chair-zap isn't going to kill you without at least rolling damage dice.
#22

jimprofit

Mar 19, 2008 21:31:26 		Getting eaten by a grue.
#23

threefists

Mar 20, 2008 7:56:48 		Suffering from a Baleful Polymorph that has turned you into a rat, and the wizard in question has a cat familiar.

As above, but said Wizard turns you into a pile of dust and commands said Cat Familiar to use you as a kitty-litter tray.
#24

xavon

Mar 21, 2008 19:16:22 		27. The DM finds out you've been sleeping with his sister.

28. The DM finds out you've been sleeping with his girlfriend.

29.The DM finds out you've been sleeping with his mother.
#25

zombiegleemax

Mar 27, 2008 13:11:44 		??+1: Roll a spot check... A result of two? Okay, you made it. You look into the sky to see a white-hot meteorite careening through the atmosphere at speeds unknown. Before you have time to react, the mile-wide meteor crashes into, squishes, and vaporizes you. Miraculously, your munchkined body was enough to absorb all of the momentum of the meteor, and it was shaped in such a way as to not harm anything else nearby. The new mountain (and the tunnel that was amazingly left beneath it so that your friends could escape) are named after you.
Because you ruined a balor's plans for global destruction, he sends his minions to retrieve your soul, and dines on it. You make a very tasty lunch.
#26

masterjoda999

Apr 06, 2008 1:59:20
14. Rocks fall. Everybody Dies.
15. Multi-Headed Advanced Half-Fiendish Rust Monster of Legend. You probably won't die, but that's so much for your stuff.
16. Inevidables with shotguns. (An in-joke. I think.)


Cookies for anyone who knows 14.

Ending of Neverwinter Nights 2?
#27

trappedslider

Apr 06, 2008 2:36:25 		GM : "I'm sorry,but the only car your character can afford is a ford pinto."
#28

jaiadrottsingr

Apr 06, 2008 15:53:30

GM : "I'm sorry,but the only car your character can afford is a ford pinto."

A seventy six Ford Pinto.

...

With a gas leak.

#29

trappedslider

Apr 06, 2008 18:31:47



A seventy six Ford Pinto.

...

With a gas leak.


With a defect sticker on the window
#30

jaiadrottsingr

Apr 06, 2008 19:08:02

"I felt just enough out of place there, that I might have had a factory defect sticker on my forehead."

#31

markermage

Apr 07, 2008 0:49:00
14. Rocks fall. Everybody Dies.
15. Multi-Headed Advanced Half-Fiendish Rust Monster of Legend. You probably won't die, but that's so much for your stuff.
16. Inevidables with shotguns. (An in-joke. I think.)


Cookies for anyone who knows 14.

FoxTrot. Someone in my family had that particular comic strip up on a bulletin board in the house for much of my life.
#32

entropy_judge

Apr 08, 2008 11:40:01 		X+1) "There's a pitch-black doorway to the dungeon; do you enter?"
"Yes."
"You die. No save."
#33

EyeHunter

Apr 09, 2008 8:41:44 		33. Not the exploding chinawowow trap!
#34

bosh_vant

Apr 16, 2008 1:17:22
14. Rocks fall. Everybody Dies.
15. Multi-Headed Advanced Half-Fiendish Rust Monster of Legend. You probably won't die, but that's so much for your stuff.
16. Inevidables with shotguns. (An in-joke. I think.)


Cookies for anyone who knows 14.

Well I don't think any one has gotten it yet but I am Positive, that someone will. Now "The Doomlock Aerial Boulder Squad Strikes! Soon comrades, soon, they shall all know and fear our might! Viva La Revolucion!" Now to a place where Ultra-Violence goes hand in hand with cute marketability!
#35

markermage

Apr 16, 2008 4:04:49
Well I don't think any one has gotten it yet but I am Positive, that someone will. Now "The Doomlock Aerial Boulder Squad Strikes! Soon comrades, soon, they shall all know and fear our might! Viva La Revolucion!" Now to a place where Ultra-Violence goes hand in hand with cute marketability!

The joke appeared in Fox Trot years before it appeared in Something Positive. After doing a bit more research, it appears that it originated even earlier. It was apparently a trap in a Ravenloft Module.
#36

melpomene

Apr 16, 2008 15:39:31 		"I've never heard of something so tragic that I cared so little about."

An interesting bit of trivia on what is apperantly the oldest way of saying "You die. No save."
#37

imal

May 10, 2008 19:50:57
32. "Orcus appears in front of you. He looks... irate."

Pure Gold.
#38

Kraetyz

May 12, 2008 11:34:18 		The DM starts searching wizards.com for that article with the 30-headed Tarrasque.

No save. Ever.
#39

doomsought

May 13, 2008 20:54:05 		We replaced your plate armor with mimics, every single plate... and your blood with a water elemental... and your hair, you don't want to know what we replaced your hair with...its a templated Tarrasque, I think.
#40

Kraetyz

May 14, 2008 13:35:13
We replaced your plate armor with mimics, every single plate... and your blood with a water elemental... and your hair, you don't want to know what we replaced your hair with...its a templated Tarrasque, I think.

Ouch. Just ouch.
#41

justjarjar

May 26, 2008 20:30:41 		You run to fast and hit Mr. T's gold chains.... with your head.
#42

Kraetyz

May 30, 2008 6:36:42
You run to fast and hit Mr. T's gold chains.... with your head.

That's pretty much auto-die...

The epic rogue just said: Uh oh...
#43

jaiadrottsingr

May 30, 2008 15:32:31

If the DM has all the rogues painted red by default in his world, prepare to get smothered by, choke on, and die because of the excess of rouge present in your all rogue party.

This came up when one of my players (who was acting as DM this session) didn't just misspell rogue, he pronounced it 'rouge.'

#44

Kraetyz

May 31, 2008 8:56:08

If the DM has all the rogues painted red by default in his world, prepare to get smothered by, choke on, and die because of the excess of rouge present in your all rogue party.

This came up when one of my players (who was acting as DM this session) didn't just misspell rogue, he pronounced it 'rouge.'


I... Hate you. XD
I made a mistake, and I fixed it. Happeh now, crazy person?!
(say hello to Caillus from me)
#45

doomsought

Jun 03, 2008 18:19:58 		You finish off the two liter, DM reaches for it, but finds you enjoying the bounty.
He reaches for the epic level handbook.


Your DM calls some books by H.P. Lovecraft "reasearch material.":coolcthul
#46

Kraetyz

Jun 04, 2008 11:12:32 		Research material... That's just wonderful XD

Another reason: You got to the end of Bastion of Broken Souls.
(Read the adventure, haven't got to play it yet... Does feel a little insta-kill, though)
#47

doomsought

Jun 06, 2008 13:42:13 		The campaign is based off berserk.
That, or you will totally blow their minds.
Both, if you start at the carnival.
#48

ORC_Nashira

Jun 22, 2008 15:09:54 		Moved at VCL Request.
#49

necroticbanana

Jun 22, 2008 22:26:37 		oops
#50

j0lt

Jun 23, 2008 1:26:53 		You are an optometrist. Your next client is a Beholder.