When my 12th lvl 1e Magic-User had both his arms cut off by Slicer Beatles. (Darn Somatic Components...)
1) When my fighter (3.5) whacked an advanced Gray Ooze (MM 202), which dissolves metal weapons, and lost his +4 adamantium keen holy giantbane glaive. And given the fact that the weapon was worth over 128,000 gp and takes 128 days to craft, that was worse than dying twice. Which is really stupid.
2) When another character of mine (also 3.5) drew the wrong card from a deck of many things, and lost all belongings - again, worse than death. In this case it was partly my fault, as I made the stupid decision to draw from the deck - last time I'll ever do that.
3) Second gaming session of my life - a party member (2e) slit my dwarven cleric's throat while he slept - on the first night.
4) Third gaming session of my life - the entire party (3.0) banded together to sneak into a dwarven delve and kill my character, a Cleric of Moradin. They succeeded. Years later, the DM finally apologized for encouraging the other players.
Now that I look back on it, I wonder why I ever got into gaming, what with my wonderful introductory sessions...
One of my characters fell into a space-time anomaly (that GM had a serious thing for mixing his genres) thus dooming her to an eternity of hurtling through various times and dimensions.
She became a running joke, occasionaly popping in and out of scenes in the wierdest places in stories she had no connection to.
In 2e, I had a Dm cause my character to get stuck with a permanent clownface.
I had a melee fighter character permanently blinded for about 4 levels of gameplay. Rolemaster, we couldn't afford to get him fixed by RAW, and he spent quite a few sessions at serious penalties. By the time he was healed, he was at about 50% effectiveness due to a backup skill ("spatial awareness" or similar name) that allowed you to claw back percentages of combat skills per level when blinded.
Over the years only one thing has truly pissed me off. Not just me, but the entire group. When it happened we all walked out and never played under that DM.
It was in 3.5 and the adventure was going pretty well and was fun. One day our characters entered a town and somehow ended up in a small alley with no exits. Suddenly we were swarmed by tons of pirates that jumped and raped us. They stole our hard earned goods and left us to die in the streets. That was the end of that campaign.
2) When another character of mine (also 3.5) drew the wrong card from a deck of many things, and lost all belongings - again, worse than death. In this case it was partly my fault, as I made the stupid decision to draw from the deck - last time I'll ever do that.
While it was tecnically dying, it was a pretty bullstuff way of doing it; We were doing a one-shot where we all got to draw from the deck of many things, one of my draws made one of the party members want to kill me. Naturally it was the sorcerer who cast phantasmal killer after the first encounter (Granted, it was still an amazing game, I just expletiving hate phantasmal killer now).
When my awesome, ugly, tough-as-nails, ruthless, macho bastard of an orc rogue died, our only option for bringing him back was to have our party druid cast reincarnate and I rolled...
Female Gnome.
Truely, it was worse than death. Still, it was fun.
When my awesome, ugly, tough-as-nails, ruthless, macho bastard of an orc rogue died, our only option for bringing him back was to have our party druid cast reincarnate and I rolled...
Female Gnome.
Truely, it was worse than death. Still, it was fun.
That's why reincarnate was fun!
1. When a second paladin player joined the group, hated how I played my paladin, causing him to hate me personally, and eventually the group broke up.
2. The DM did not start my character with the rest of the party, spent at least an hour dealing with some combat, and was about to start yet another combat without my character having shown up yet when I quit.
3. Being yelled at in public by two players because they hated how I played a cleric the night before and in general; thus when it became one of their turns to DM, my character in his game could never, ever do anything right.
4. The spellcasters in the group would cast buff spells on themselves, other party members, and NPC party members but never me. When I finally asked for one some weeks later they said they had to do everyone else first. The next week when they did everyone else first I asked but was told they were out. When we were fighting undead with magic DR such that my rogue/order of the bow initiate was doing diddlysquat, I suggested it would be a good idea for someone to cast Greater Magic Weapon on my arrows and got yelled at in response exclaiming how dare I demand a spell and I should just by my own damn magic arrows.
Polymorphed into a giant set of balls. (not joking and wasn't funny cause it led to a party wipe)
/thread.
Wow! From the funny, to the disturbing, to the surreal. Please, keep em coming.
In a 3.0 game, me and my friend were playing elven brothers. The DM ruled that when he used his ring of telekinesis he had to roll to hit. He rolled a one and thanks to an oh so wonderful fumble table my character was somehow flung 100ft into the air, taking falling up damage, then fell back to the ground taking standard falling damage. He survived and all was good until the DM ruled that his arms were broken and normal healing magic wouldn't fix it. He was an arcane archer that couldn't pull his bow or use a sword because his arms were broken, after about an hour of stewing watching everyone else have fun, I left.
My druid once became a ficus, which, according to the DM, was only 'practically' dead, not 'technically' dead.
In another instance, our entire party was almost vanquished by a shed. Regular, ordinary shed. We fell into the basement of it, and another player pulled the ladder down. We spent half an hour trying to figure out how to get out. By the end of it, the DM looked at us blankly, stating, "Congradulations, you have conquered the shed."
Warren the Warforged Warden was repeatedly mistaken for a barbarian during a PVP match (and I don't mean "That warforged looks large and angry, must be a barbarian", I announced his class several times, yet people still kept thinking I was a barbarian). Granted, I found it awesome, but it got to the point that I jokingly announced that I was just going to start using barbarian at-wills and see if anybody noticed.
When my character was locked in the inescapable prison cell for the entire session on a spell jammer in a spell jammer campaign. The rest of the party spent the encounter breaking me out. Why? I don't know, they did not know me, the ship I was on was bigger, better armed and had more bad guys than them. But they had to attack and ended up rescueing my character. My character sat in the cell the whole time. It sucked.
In a1e game, my Druid character had an affair with a Drow assassin. She was emotionally volatile and often threatened to kill my druid if he left her or cheated on her or did not please her in bed. A Constitution check I think. He was scared of her. Really scared.
I think the moral of the story is to not have relations with female drow.
I think the moral of the story is to not have relations with female drow.
Depends on what you're into :3.
You know, it's funny, but I'm going to tell a 3rd Edition Paladin story, and it's probably not one you've heard before.
When my Pally and his Pals went into a town, I introduced myself to the gate guard appropriately. He got a little nervous. I asked to make a Sense Motive check, and succeeded, and was sure it was the fact that I was a Paladin was what was making him edgy. I gave him the Detect Evil look, and he pinged.
Now, since I didn't know precisely what he had done, I didn't go off on him. I had no real evidence, and his deeds may not have warranted bashing his head in. So when we move away from the gate, I ask our resident party sneak to keep an eye on him, explaining why.
At that point, the DM stripped my powers ... because I didn't go Smite On Sight. So, by trying to be just and merciful, I got hosed. I just retired the character, since he wasn't going to atone because he hadn't done anything wrong.
I think this was when I banned the headache disguised as a class in my own games.
It was a 3.5 campaign. i was playing a elven fighter/ranger going two-weapon fighting with duel spiked gauntlets; was an awesome character. He used light armor and was generally a beast. Was exploring a drow outpost with the party: Dwarf barbarian, human cleric, thri-kreen rogue/ranger, and a centaur fighter. The player that was the centaur, being the genious that he was, decided to bash in a solid iron door in the middle of a cavern complex; needless to say the resulting echo of hoof-on-iron ended up with the entire party being swarmed with drow. My character, being a mortal enemy of the sadistic drow, the DM decided my character had both his arms and legs removed, and kept alive by a minor magical amulent, and became living target-practice for the drow. That was the last time i ever played with the guy who was the centaur lol.
The groups ranger was swallowed by a crocodile, which was petrified on the next turn, on a deserted island, without the appropriate ritual to reverse the petrification or the means to take a huge stone crocodile anywhere.
The group is TPKed by a beholder. After the TPK the wardens player says "I guess I should have used my action point... (pause) and my 2 dailys I have left..." Oddly, the warden was also petrified and it was the same player that played the ranger.
I dont know about worse than death but this was hilarious for my group. I was playing an Orc fighter. Our group decides to go to the brothel. we all pick someone up. We roll to see male or female (the entire group playing male characters). Everyone gets a female but my character, ok. then we roll for age, 5d6. Everyones female is 17-24, my "boy" turns out to be 11 (facepalm). Then my friend turns to me and says, "but wait, you arent a cleric."
To which I must reply, "I just took the multi-class cleric feat last time we leveled..." (more facepalm)
I once played a CN halfling rouge (need I say more), who was deathly afraid of spiders. When we entered the epic level wizards house there was a big shiney glowing awesome looking cube thingy there. Of course I was going to touch it. It transported me to a random place, We rolled, and I ended up looking upon Lolth. She proceeded to polymorph my rouge into a dryder, and thus I was eternaly afriad of myself.
My rogue:
had to cut off his own right hand so he didnt have to kill his own sister who did something against the guild on accident (Got fixed inadvertently while time travelling).
has been tortured by the Lady of Pain. Is now under her protection though.
was trapped in carcerai
I thought I had much more but my rogue is pretty cautious i guess. at least compared to the rest of my party. If I was playing solo, none of those things would have happened and my character wouldnt have died twice (compared to at least 5 times for everyone else). On the other hand, they made for memorable gaming sessions.
Here's a few things that have befallen my characters in recent years;
1) Forced to stop playing my character:
I return to playing D&D in late 2005. I (re)make a favorite character with the 3.5 rules. Within the year I'm thrust back into the role of DMing & it's not really feasible to keep playing my character. 
2) Surprise Ending:
Mid 2006 sees a few friends of mine open a new gaming shop open in the area. The shop hosts games 7 nights a week - WANTED: DMs & players. So I join a 3.5 game & re-create my favorite character yet again.... Oct. 2008 At the end of a pretty normal session the DM simply annonces that he's quitting (as in gaming altogether) & walks away. With our characters still hanging of the side of a collapsing bridge. Not dead, just in one of those "To Be Continued" moments you get at the end of a TV season. Except there's no new season coming.
3) The same - yet nowhere near similar....:
2009 - part I: One of our DMs wants to run a 3.5 game & a 4e game based in the same area/city. The idea is that the parties & their exploits will serve as NPCs/hooks etc in each others games & the DM will only need one set of master notes. Ok. Sign me up for the 3.5 version please..... Just after Easter real-life frictions between several of the 3.5 players bring this 1/2 of the game to an early end. I've since joined the 4e version & transfered my character over. But overall 4e just doesn't satisfy me. And my character is nowhere near as interesting due to the rules. Thank God I'm playing it with some of my best friends....
4) "Immune to Death", or "Thanks Josh":
2009 - part II: March sees our Sunday evening SciFi/Modern game wrap up pretty much as scheduled. The discussion turns to what to play next. One of the guys is adamant that he wants our one good friend to run a (better) 3.5 D&D game.
The friend in question runs games of such poor quality that it's a damned good thing you don't have to be liscensed to DM.... Envision the PnP equivelent of Plan 9 From Outer Space. Combined with enough loot to redefine the term Monty Hall. With a dose of LSD tossed in. And this guy A) loves to DM, B) knows his games have/develop these flaws. To put it mildly we were reluctant. But he swore he'd try & improve. So, since none of us wanted to DM atm....
To be fair the new game did start out improved. About two months in though the player (Josh) that requested this game/this DM flaked out & quit playing(again). His was a central figure apparently. And then things started to regress. To the point where most of the group is 100% immune to death (except via DM fiat I suppose), has about 3 pages of loot apiece, and none of us can spin a narritive of the weeks that makes any sense. Some of think this is more of the same old crap that makes us reluctant to play in this guys games. Some of us think/hope that the DM has finally simply looked at his own style & USED that to spin a tale. (We've a few ideas how that could be done.) Another 12 sessions or so & we should see who's right....
So, for the time being, I'm stuck playing in one game with a completely lacking rule-set, and another being run for someone who's departed where I can't even die - let alone describe the story.
Playing my very nimble character who has a mithral baseball bat.
He is getting charged by a skeletal knight on a skeletal horse.
At the last minute I jump to one side and swing my bat at the horses legs - to which the DM just says "roll to hit, you hit. OK roll your damage"
So I just damaged the horse. It kept on running. I was very sad that the DM couldn't flow at all with role played combat.
Also in the same game (this was at a convention) The DM was running a world based on the stories of Elric the Melnebonian by Michael Moorcock:
We encountered a river of white liquid, investigated it, DM says it smelled like water but was just milky white. I dipped my hand in and was immediately burning in agony - Acid the DM now tells us. He rolls my damage and tells me my hand is now permanently scarred.
This is a continuing character of mine and I carried that scar with me even after that convention.
Not a big deal right? Well a couple years later I read the stories of Elric....read them all. Loved them. I found the scene with the milky white river that was exactly as the DM described it. Guess what? In the book it was perfectly fine drinkable water. That sadistic DM made it acid just to be mean I guess.
In 2e, after a very hard encounter, we are searching through the pile of treasure . I end up with a cursed item (a girdle) that turns me into a woman. Of course we were in the middle of nowhere and it took us a couple months of playing to get to a town to remove the curse.
Leason learned: never put on a girdle - ever.
Playing my very nimble character who has a mithral baseball bat.
He is getting charged by a skeletal knight on a skeletal horse.
At the last minute I jump to one side and swing my bat at the horses legs - to which the DM just says "roll to hit, you hit. OK roll your damage"
So I just damaged the horse. It kept on running. I was very sad that the DM couldn't flow at all with role played combat.
The worst thing, barring death, that ever happened to you was a DM who followed the rules?
Truly, a sheltered existence you have led.
This didn't happen to me, it happened because of me, but it was funny.
we were playing 3.5, I was a cleric and my cousin was a fighter. We were fighting a medusa, the fighter got petrified, always lame. So a monk came running out of no where and killed the medusa then left, stupid monks. Anyway, there I was with my cousin petrified by the medusa, I had the right spells to fix him but first.....
I stone shaped his head into mickey mouse, then cast stone to flesh...and we had mickey mouse the fighter running around, and he really kicked, especially since he was so pissed.
Good thing it was a one timer.
I had a character that was driven insane, became an NPC because of this, and later showed back up as a villain.
Meanwhile, a number of people I game with play in another group, where the DM enforces the concept of "Don't split the group" by Squik. Any character, regardless of gender, who leaves the group for any length of time, ends up getting abducted and molested. And molested is an understatement. Yeah.
Original I6 Ravenloft. 13th level thief lost 4 levels to energy drain within ten minutes of game time. No restoration in sight, took a year to get those four levels.
It was my very first character in D&D. We had to fight a druid that was trying to 'take vengeance for the destruction of nature'. He was performing this ritual in a tree that was most easily accessed by going to the top of a castle. We run all the way up to the top, I get there late because I'm in plate, and we try to go across these stairs made of vine.
I rolled a one on a reflex save to avoid the trap that the stairs were. They cocooned me, became non stairs, and I fell a very long distance to the ground causing heavy damage to my armor. So, I jump on my horse which I had left at the bottom previously and ride it back up to the top, figuring its my only way to make the jump to the tree.
Just as I get there, someone crits the druid and we were using the crit chart. His throat gets cut. He jumps off the platform, heals himself so he doesn't bleed out, and flies down to the ground. So, its a trip back down the tower I just got the top of. Everyone finishes their run at him around the same time. He attacks a random person, chooses my horse(which I had just got) and one shots it with a crit. Then he is killed by the next few attacks.
I never got to hit him, ruined my armor, and got my paladin mount killed. I was sad.
I played in a 3.5 gestalt game for a few months. Our group conldn't seem to level by any normal means. We reached 2nd level by getting hit by a falling rock trap that we had no chance of finding let alone disarming (no rogue). 3rd level was gained by opening a random closet and having a skeleton land on top of the paladin.
Group I used to play with let me sit down a hole for two sessions befor telling the DM they had no intention of getting me out. DM wouldn't let me re roll either.
After spending 2 whole sessions as a parrot in a jungle enviroment (druid 3.5) and angering a local nature high priest, I apparently lost the ability to wildshape (some sort of curse) back into humanoid form.
The following months onboard the ship with pirates was interesting.
What made it worse than death? The never ending stream of "Polly wants a cracker?" jokes.
My gestalt Psion/Fighter Minotaur put on a cursed cloak that reduced my str and int to 10 and we couldn't get it off. Until he died I would just say Moo so it was funny if you were there.
Though is happened to a friend and did die I think it should be here. Our buddy was doing the Red Hand of Doom adventure and our ranger went to investigate a wagon in a creek. He came back saying nothing was there. Well the DM read a little further down and said "Oops I forgot something" so the ranger went back and was surprised attacked by a hydra that killed him in the first round of combat. He hasn't been our DM for awhile now.
In a 3.5 game my troll-blooded human warlock stepped in a trapdoor while raiding a stronghold infested by the yuan-ti, he was separated from the party, barely survived the fall and broke his both legs. Of course, the yuan-ti captured him and snatched him to their lair, then forced him to drink that poison that turns you either into a tainted one or a broodguard, and guess what? My warlock got turned into a broodguard before the rest of the party rescued him. After a while of sucking it up, I just rolled a new character when the new racial adjustments I got just made the character unplayable. So, he gave in to the evil and the rest of the party just killed him.
1) Second Edition game.
One player in the party attacked another PC. I forget why, it was some lame reason, like he wanted a magic item or something. Well he failed and his next character was the dreaded revenge PC and killed the other player, which spiraled out of control. For five sessions. By the end of it no one even knew why we were killing each other, we just were. Third session my character was gated to the Abyss and molested by an Acid Demon. Not impressed at all.
2) Second Edition game again
The DM had a NPC that used to be a PC which he used as a villian. He was a Rogue with an extra powered Hat of Disguise that could go one size off medium. We had NO CHANCE to detect the guy his disguises were perfect. He could imitate people perfectly so perfect it would make a doppleganger envious. He got two of our players imprisioned, one exiled and my character BRANDED as an adulterer. The game finally ended when he framed (again perfectly) the fighter in our group for treason and executed. The player was so angry he jumped the DM and put him in a leg lock until the DM submitted. (I was shocked but later found out the two of them routinely wrestle for the heck of it). I never returned to any that DM's games.
Being a level 18 macho, tough as nails warblade and failing 16 straight fort saves to resist level loss from Energy Drain. In a party where the favored soul hadn't learned either Restoration or Lesser Restoration. This is the guy who died four times during his career. Level loss is always worse than death.
I had a character in a 2nd edition Mechwarrior game that fought in a battle on a Periphery planet, failed the landing roll, got overrun in a few seconds, got critted by enemy forces, lost his 'Mech to an ammunition explosion that caused the pilot (the PC) to eject into a cliff face...which crushed both of his feet.
He then got taken to an enemy medevac hospital where he was patched up enough to travel, and was presented to the Magestrix Syalla Centrella (Can't recall the spelling, this weas in 1989) and promptly tortured for information, leading to the loss of an eye, and his right arm.
Since he refused to crack, she thus though it fuzzily warm to remove his jubblies, and make him a plaything for the court, poking him with a stun stick, while chained to the throne.
When friendly reinforcements dropped on the planet 2 months later, rescue forces asked him how he had done, and he replied... "just kill me."
They didn't, and he got prosthetics for the missing limbs and eye, and fought on until the clan invasions, some years later, getting killed as a 'Mech company commander on the first day by a critical hit to the cockpit, no save.
No D&D Character I've played has ever had anything remotely like that happen.
Ahhh... there was a 3.0 game in which I played a Fox Hengeyokai Wu Jen as part of a custom-created campaign world, of which I can't even remember the backstory to. Anyways, the party had discovered a frontier town in which the villagers had been killed and raise as undead, including as spawns of kyuss.
After defeating the undead, the party tracked the undead back to this pond of cloudy water that smelled horrible. It was debated for a bit and the party agreed to scout the waters and then return to the surface to collect my character since he didn't want to chance an infection from the waters due to his low stamina (i.e. Fortitude save). Well, when they found the door at the bottom of the lake, one player convinced the rest to push on, leaving my character up at the edge of the lake while they finished the adventure (read the next 2-3 combats) down below.
Always fun sitting on the sidelines b/c something happens to your character or you make a poor choice that is obviously bad. That character got left behind b/c his companions went back on their word and left him. I obviously had a great time sitting on the sidelines for most of this session (ours were typically 9-10 hours long).
2e my character had a dagger that could cast wish at will. Unfortunately it was an intelligent dagger and it could cast wish. This led to many arguments between my character and the dagger that always ended badly for me. i.e. I wish you'd shut up, I wish you'd fall off a cliff, I wish you'd go to hell etc.
In my first game ever I started out as a level 15 F/M/T (don't ask me the DM was insane) and we were fighting an orc that nothing effected. I attempted use polymorph to turn him into a beetle. It didn't work. A smart ass player said to turn it into the tarrasque. I had no idea what that was but since I was the new guy I told the DM straight faced that I was going to polymorph the orc into a tarrasque. for some reason that worked.
Intelligent weapon with n ego of fifteen.......on a fifth level ninja. Sigh, will save +3 just doesn't cut it........sad face
when my character got into a bar fight with a vampire. When i was just about to kill it it bit me. Now i have to be a lvl 1 vampire for the rest of my LIFE.
by the way i was playing 4e
(2e) First time playing with magic beans. Playing a Psion. I got the first bean. I planted it and a bush grew. Everyone else went, getting various effects. One bean ended up with a hole in the ground the party was going to explore. I got a little miffed that all I got was a bush, and being the glass cannon, I was last in the hole. Being as I was upset, I torched the bush. Using molecular agitation. The bush exploded and I survived by means of a previous session with the Magic Machine of Lum the Mad. Afterwards, my Psion was terrified of fire in all iterations. Campfires, forges, fireballs. Made for some awesome roleplay, but was a bit irritating from time to time. I guess it was bad for the character, not for me.
(2e also) After retiring the Psion, I chose to play a Paladin. Wonderful roll, except for the dump of Int. A 3. I took the roll, giving my character a good concept. A mentally handicapped Paladin. This led to awesome roleplay and even more awesome quotes. Eventually, in thanks for saving the kingdom, the king gave the Paladin eggs that increased his INT by one for each one he ate. The Paladin ate a few and ended up with 10 INT. After that point, he wasn't much fun to play and we retired at about level 11.
When my Lawful Good Paladin (4.0) was dominated by an adult purple dragon for the entire fight. He broke his own moral code.
When my Lawful Good Paladin (4.0) was dominated by an adult purple dragon for the entire fight. He broke his own moral code.
Hey, at least he didn't get his powers yanked for it.
If he should, he would not have had any since the very beginning of our game. I don't remember how many times he should have lost his status as Champion of Bahamut.
The worst thing that ever happened to a character of mine was in 2e. After battling demons in hell and dispatching Azmodius, the DM decided to reward us.
He turned my character into a super hero. Seriously. He gave him the ability to fly at will, made him invulnerable to everything but yellow (yes, yellow), made him not need to breathe, eat or drink, and gave him a sword that gained a +1 for every swing you took in battle. Cumulative. Plus the sword gained 5 feet of reach each round as well.
He was going to have us become galaxy traveling freedom fighters. We did have one battle against a technological foe in a spaceship, and then we all begged the DM to turn us back into mortals.
My character, a charming elven rogue/bard in 3.5 who seduced sharess the godess of hedonism. Randomly my character would disapear randomly, during combat, during hostage talks, whenever sharess randomly teleported me away to her pleasure palace in the sky.
A few times it saved my life, but eventually made it no fun to play as I was more of a non combat NPC. character wise I am sure it was awesome. Player wise, no bueno.
The worst thing that happened to a character of mine was during 3.x, when I turned into the group's babysitter. I had made a healing-oriented, very caring cleric amidst a party of low con rogues, rangers, sorcerers and so on. Every session someone would do something incredibly impulsive, like shoot away from the group to take some big bad guy on their own, or kick open a door before we had finished exploring the current room and trigger a trap. Every session someone would end up bleeding out, with only two rounds before death. Of course, being a cleric who wanted to use my divinely gifted powers to aid those around me, I rushed over to them each time and healed them, again and again as they continued to make the same mistakes, until I ran out of healing spells. Combat grew more complex with each level gained, and I eventually had to goad them all into buying healing belts so that once the sorcerer inevitably dropped to 3 hp he could handle himself while I was hurrying off to save the rogue who was at -6 hp.
Everyone loved their characters, and it became my job to protect them so they could continue their adventures. There came a point where the game stopped being fun and started being work, where I had to stay on top of the status and abilities of every other PC at the table, and I spent my gold on backup healing potions, in order to keep them from dying.
Then I missed game for two sessions in order to help a friend out during a rough patch, and learned from one of the other players that the party had a TPK while I was gone. I was pretty grateful to have an excuse not to play with them anymore.
I had a character who coerced Tiamat to withdraw her influence from his world and people. As a parting gift, Tiamat branded her words into his flesh so that all could see her agreement. These horrible painful wounds resisted all attempts to heal or conceal them. Though his people were grateful for his deeds and governance, they were uneasy with their scarred and wounded ruler.
Eventually, my character grew tired of the pity and scorn, so he left his empire in capable hands and retired as a hermit.
not one of mine, but of my best friends.. His 3.5 character had an ability that let him transform into anything he choosed, so when presented with a large steel door, he transformed into a Bulldozer.
Then the DM reminded him that Bulldozers don't have lungs, and he had to make a saving throw every turn for the rest of the game (to moderate success)
not one of mine, but of my best friends.. His 3.5 character had an ability that let him transform into anything he choosed, so when presented with a large steel door, he transformed into a Bulldozer.
Then the DM reminded him that Bulldozers don't have lungs, and he had to make a saving throw every turn for the rest of the game (to moderate success)
LOL, if I were the DM I would have said "Um... what is this 'bulldozer' you speak of?" Geez, even a druid can't turn into animals they have never seen.
3.5: My mage was teleported without save to be sententenced by the "interplanar council" for disturbing the interplanar peace (using Contact Other Plane and Planar Binding spells seven times in three days) and spent the next session and a half (12 hour sessions) as a statue.
2e:
I played an effete and rather vain Drow Wild Mage (and used a rather lengthy table of random results). In an epic battle against the women and children of an orc tribe(we had already killed the the men and adolescents in the two previous epic battles) my character got a wild surge while trying to blast the leader of the she-orcs with a fireball.
Effect: Character switches voices with the target.
Great stuff, not only does my verbal spell component not work anymore, but everytime I speak in character, I have to speak in a high-pitched growl. We are days away from the surface and a cleric that can remove the curse. Hilarity ensues for the next sessions.
DnD has only resulted in various kinds of death for me, but my most recent forray into Warhammer FRP produced some unfortunate results. My Elvish Seaman (so many jokes about that combination) ran into a foul wizardly dude who cast a spell that mutated him. We use the Tome of Corruption, so I rolled the d1000 to see what I got.
Due to rolling between 990 and 995 twice in a row that single roll became something like 6. I thik he ended up a huge creature with a gigantic flaming skull head, tiny wolf legs, tentacles with suction cups for climbing, and basically went from drunken elven braggart to a chaos spawn in a single attack . The GM let me then try to kill the party.
Spent some time in the enforced servitute of a very nasty wizard who enjoyed playing games with us; not much fun. One of his ideas was that we should 'Go to Lantan and back in two weeks; if you don't make it, you'll die.' Lantan is of course on the other side of the world.
We did escape his clutches eventually; if memory serves, I lost my arm in a ship storm, which while catastophic, did make my slave's binding arm thingy go away. (This was quite cool in the end, I got a fake magical metal arm which gave me a bonus to strength!)
We also met an aboleth who did that irritating illness to my fellow player. He was then close to dying and I had to flirt with a merchant to get the cure; being slaves we had no money!
That was a fun game, fantastic characters.
so our adventuring party decided to go piss off a dragon who had found our very succesful gnome rouges treasure trove [ the same gnome who told us that a farmer wanted us to get rid of the dragon....bastard].
after easily clearing a very small dungeon, we came to the "den" and killed the dragon.
thats when we realised that the stuff in the cave was mostly our own! "hey faris! innit that your enchanted sword that you said you'd leave at your place in case you might need it sometime ?"
"yeah...and mehi....innit that your sword-wand thingy?"
"weir! you little conniving!"
Had a level 1 rogue escape a keep with 1hp. Killed the warden and the constable. Made it safely back to the party. Healed up and ventured into a cave with the group and was killed by a goblin spear.
Ha, I just remembered this one, but it is technically a death. My nephew was playing an elven ranger and we were fighting a nest of beholders. The fights were not going great, another player was turned to stone, and a creeping doom was cast (this was 3.0, so creeping doom was not weak), so my nephew pulls the stoned guy over himself, the DM ruled that he was saved from the creeping doom. Then two rounds later, exactly after his character escaped being pinned under the statued character, a beholder cast a flesh to stone on him, which he failed. Being turned to stone is never fun, but to make matters worse the next round, just to add the insult, the beholder cast a disintegrate, which he failed. This is the cruelest yet hilarious death I have ever actually been there to witness in the game.
Our team... no, our group... We came across a small village, where there was a temple of Bahamut. True to his deity, my Paladin wanted to take this temple's trial, to prove his worth as a Paladin of Bahamut. They accepted the request, and gave him three trials: a trial of Strength, a trial of Wisdom and a trial of Charisma. The first trial (Strength) proved to be the hardest. Without help from anyone, he would have to defeat a modified Barlgura (don't know if it's spelled correctly). After the first few combat rounds, he was almost reduced to a pile of dead meat, until his allies... his teammates... the random strangers, who were headed in the same general direction as he was, assisted him, thus breaking the rules for the trial. At least he didn't die...
Sounds great, right?
Problem was, the gorram dorf decides to say that he hits the etin in the **** with his hammer.
So the DM is like...ok, it explodes.
I'm right up there in the front with him.
My character was covered in blood, feces and entrails.
So I got my friend clobbered by a figment of a god's imagination.
Need I add that he taught me how to make my own character before the next session?
our party got targeted by a medusa so she decides to stalk my friends character. she sneaks up on him and uses her gaze on him but she took the feat/ability that allows her to target limbs instead of turning the whole body to stone so she turns his arms to stone then breaks them off and leaves. i made alot of fun of him especially because im prety sure the medusa had taken improved disarm. i also told him to take improved unarmed strike needless to say he didnt think i was funny.
the next three are in the same campaign in which Azlin from ravenloft decides to try to leave ravenloft but in the process takes his whole domain with him eventually we have to fight him but i willa get to that later.
one of my friends has a druid and we walk into a underground temple area that isnt very well lit and we see the enemy/npc that we are supposed to get so the druid decides to cast some light spell cant remember might be dancing lights but the enemy had held his action waiting for someone to cast a spell so he threw his chakrum at him and hit him. i told the player to use his concentration to keep casting but my brother says he doesnt finish the spell so i tell him that he can if he passes the concentration check once again my brother informs us that he does not finish the spell. he then told us that the enemy had gotten a crit and the chakrum was vorpal he died but it was funny.
we went to fight a werewolf type guy and after a dinner a scuffle ensues and the wolf guy runs up some stairs so our dwarven fighter/battlerager (forgotten realms prestige) and chases him out onto a balcony. once again my brothers bad guy held his action and charged the dwarf and the werewolf had large and in charge so he smacked the dwarf off the balcony that was a hundred feet off the ground he survived and our wizard who had cast fly flew down and picked him up and almost made it to the top before the player reminded us he had spiked armor so the wizard took dmg and dropped the dward who survived the fall again but was out of the rest of the fight because he had to climb back up the tower
early on with our game our party got turned to mithral because of a monster combo my brother made that was half medusa half blue dragon so his gaze turns things to mithral instead of stone. anyway after 3 years we get turned back and continue on our adventure eventually getting to fight azlin rex in ravenloft and he cast disjunction on us and because i was a wizard/cleric/true necro my will save was very high so i save against everything and kept going almost at death azlin casts a spell and i try saving against it and fail and i ask if i can make a spell craft check which my brother informs me i make without rolling i failed against you guessed it stone to flesh. we win only having 2 character deaths and azlins domain goes back into ravenloft and anyone who died went to ravenloft and the others went back to the realms. he counted my character as dead so i went to ravenloft but the spell was removed so i was alone in ravenloft with 2 dead allies with no way out or so i thought..
He did let me prolong my life slightly past where I would be assumed dead, basically so I could destroy a fellow players' chances at making "orange soda" in the game. Strangely, that character was optimized for alchemy, but the DM just didn't like the idea. I don't blame him. So exploding orange soda alchemy sets might be on his list, too.