After the worst performance ever on a battlefield (serious player errors) the two adventurers find themselves on deaths door, stripped, and jailed (separately).
Character: Hybrid Cleric/Paladin. 9th level caster (using cleric's spell list combined with Prestige Paladin from Unearthed Arcana). The other guy's a cleric/fighter hybrid of a lower caster level, so unless he talks his way out (see below why it probably won't work) I have a better chance with spells.
First attempt to get out: Using straw from bedding tried to weave together (no basket weaving skill, who knew I'd need it) a holy symbol. The dungeon cel is enclosed with a solid door and no bars. Guards can't see in, unless there's clairvoyance/scrying going on. Rudely interrupted by guards (no roll what so ever to avoid getting grabbed etc. just informed that I'm grabbed by guards... ), all straw taken away. At this point I kinda had to throw my hands up. It's become blatantly obvious that the DM's been metagaming over the past few adventures, culminating with this final situation.
No matter how creative or odd my ideas have been, there's always something which turns out to be the perfect counter which was (surprise, surprise) already awaiting me... Buff spells are always made to expire 'before' the bad guys show up, if there is any gray area in the rules, or even specific details for how a skill/feat works, the DM almost always rules in a manner which is against the characters. Aside from simply walking away from the game, I'm looking for a way to shoot some holes in the campaign which the DM has been forcefully shoehorning the characters into, before sending out my character in a blaze of glory. The storyline works great for everyone, but as far as rules and game dynamics go, it's getting rediculous.
So... this is where I need some ideas.
One possible way out is 'Stone Shape' if I'm able to somehow make a holy symbol for the component. My guess is that the walls will 'miraculously' turn out to have spell resistance, etc. But for now the plan is use the characters own blood to draw a holy symbol on his clothing, then use 'Stone Shape' to make a stone symbol out of the cell wall (this is a far leap, and will probably require some kind of faith roll, or simply won't work). But that opens up most combat spells and the 'blast my way out' is a go.
Here you may suggest since I'm a paladin, why not go the diplomacy route... simple. I've tried it many times before, and the DM simply tells me to make bluff rolls, when what I'm doing is absolutely not bluffing, but negotiating or persuading. And when I do get to make my 20+ diplomacy rolls, he ignores rules and has me actually role play it out. Which I've done, but at this point he pretty much ignores all dynamics of adjusting hostility levels with diplomacy, so it has basically become a vestigial skill. So my options are, let the DM drag my character kicking and screaming through 'his' game regardless of how I want to play it, or I fight his flow and force him to simply kill the character.
Any suggestions on spells (verbal/somantic only) I could use if the holy symbol creation attempts are removed every time by the DMs metagaming. (Hell I've even considered using create food and taking the chicken bones to make the symbol! hah, probably won't work though...)
Spells that could be handy Searing Light, Silence, Dispel Magic... But every time I see very easy fixes the DM can do on the fly. Countless guards until I run out of spells, Antimagic areas where he wants to put 'em suddenly. Or just send down the lvl 15 wizard that's buffed/geared to the teeth to 'calm' me down.
Any ideas for spells/actions to turn the tables on the situation? BTW no Travel domain, so no Teleporting :-(.
Thanks for reading. :-)
Tell him you walk out of the dungeon. If he doesn't play by the rules, why should you?
Heh :-). That might be unexpected enough that he won't be able to adjust the setting for it. 
I guess in a way that's what I'm looking for. Some kind of scheme that is so bizzare, that when the DM tries to adjust things on the fly I can call him on it, as in 'there's no way in hell you planned for that contingency of my character's actions'.
Thanks :-).
Throw punches at the guards until you figure out the armor DC then start kicking them, or using whatever you can, see if the DC starts magically changing on the same guards with the same armor if you start getting the upperhand
or, after you figure out the guards DC's in these dungeons...
show up to the next game with a new fully optmized character that just HAPPENED upon the dungeon your buddy is chained up in, claim your last character managed to slit his own wrists on the walls prefering to be in the presense of his god rather than in the presense of these guys.
;)
It is not right, but I am curious: "How many sessions has s/he had you locked in the dungeon?" and "Does the DM always play like this?"... it must not be fun to see every idea twarted, but maybe he has a "grand scheme" that sees him "justified" in this behaviour as a one off encounter.
This still does not make it right though - but if it is not a common occurance, and usually s/he plays by the rules, I would just shake my head, sit back and do nothing till the DM gets to the point as whatever I am planning to do will be useless anyway.
We've actually only been locked up for about 2/3 of the last session until the DM called it a night sighting the need to adjust parallel story lines based on our current situation. The thought that there is a grand scheme is probably dead on. The DM's games tend to have grandious schemes and intrigues. We have spent hours aimlessly bashing against things in the game before until we found the 'right' solution...
I guess I'll try a few different things proactively, then have the character sit and do nothing... then have him join his deity and roll a shadowcraft gnome from hell . I'd love to see him rule-0 that at will shadow reality Wish, after he's indicated that all printed material is allowed >:D.
Thanks for the feedback.
I love rusting grasp ;)
Your dm sounds like he's overcompensating for trying to keep the campaign on track .... so instead of creating fun, interesting reasons why the pc's should go along with the exercise (like other prisoners talking to the pcs about a co-ordinated breakout attempt... thus a legitimate reason to stay in your cells till the day of the prison break) ... he's just telling the pcs to stay in their cells so he can do 'x'.
My last dm created a similiar prison break campaign .... the rogue unpicked my cell with a hidden blade, and my monk stunning fist the gaoler and stole his keys, and unlocked everybody's cells. Literally taking him hostage to placate the enemy guards into not attacking us as we performed our nefarious task ;)
Itr was a fun exercise the dm did in response to the party getting a little too un-team-like ... but if your dm isn't allowing co-ordinated effortss of the pcs to break out .... well ... that's just mean.
My DM usually gets the hint that he's being a bit too clever when I do something like this:
Him: No, that doesn't work.Me: Okay, I give up.Him: No, come on, you've got to do something.Me: No, my character gives up. He's exhausted all the options he can think of.(silence)
My DM usually gets the hint that he's being a bit too clever when I do something like this:
Him: No, that doesn't work.Me: Okay, I give up.Him: No, come on, you've got to do something.Me: No, my character gives up. He's exhausted all the options he can think of.(silence)
This is what I was about to suggest. If you're out of ideas, you're out of ideas. It's even more fun when it happens to the entire party, so all the players and the DM just kind of spend a couple of minutes looking at one another. 
My DM usually gets the hint that he's being a bit too clever when I do something like this:
Him: No, that doesn't work.Me: Okay, I give up.Him: No, come on, you've got to do something.Me: No, my character gives up. He's exhausted all the options he can think of.(silence)
Define 'too clever' ...
'too clever'- like only one solution to a problem/puzzle ....like as if the dm had given you a rubix cube irl and said "solve that and your pc breaks free from a dungeon's control over you?
Then yeah :x I'd be like " My character flamestrikes the cube so all sides are black and crispy ;)"
But clever as in well designed puzzles involving keys on the ceiling because of a constant reverse gravity effect and the pcs have to figure a way to get it using both the environment and their rope + weights without getting caught in the effect too?
Where a character sould hurl a 1/4 staff tied with rope and drag it across the roof, pulling the key out of the reverse gravity field and have it fall to the ground .... or my character could climb up the side of the wall, walk across the ceiling, hurl a rope down to my friends, secure the rope to the ceiling and reverse climb the rope back down.
Multiple solutions of different degrees of success and difficulty I have no problem with.
My DM usually gets the hint that he's being a bit too clever when I do something like this:
Him: No, that doesn't work.Me: Okay, I give up.Him: No, come on, you've got to do something.Me: No, my character gives up. He's exhausted all the options he can think of.(silence)Define 'too clever' ...
'too clever'- like only one solution to a problem/puzzle ....like as if the dm had given you a rubix cube irl and said "solve that and your pc breaks free from a dungeon's control over you?
Then yeah :x I'd be like " My character flamestrikes the cube so all sides are black and crispy ;)"
But clever as in well designed puzzles involving keys on the ceiling because of a constant reverse gravity effect and the pcs have to figure a way to get it using both the environment and their rope + weights without getting caught in the effect too?
Where a character sould hurl a 1/4 staff tied with rope and drag it across the roof, pulling the key out of the reverse gravity field and have it fall to the ground .... or my character could climb up the side of the wall, walk across the ceiling, hurl a rope down to my friends, secure the rope to the ceiling and reverse climb the rope back down.
Multiple solutions of different degrees of success and difficulty I have no problem with.
Too Clever: Absolutely nothing the PC does will ever succeed, as the bad guys have thought of absolutely everything because the DM retroactively puts in countermeasures for whatever idea the PC just had.
Too Clever: Absolutely nothing the PC does will ever succeed, as the bad guys have thought of absolutely everything because the DM retroactively puts in countermeasures for whatever idea the PC just had.
That sucks x.x I've never really had a dm like that :x I've had dms react to spells/skills that I constantly use, and rendered them inert ... which is fair because being an adventurer means being adaptable :P
But I would be annoyed if a dm basically stipulated to me that there is nothing I can do about anything that was about to happen.
Fortunately most of my dms I've had prefer the theory that "no PC is ever 100% right about wahtever they do, therefore multiple answers to problems should also be available ... 100% of the time"
Thats my preferred dming approach too :x I like puzzles .... but I always think them through and make sure that atleast one of my pcs will come up with something within 10 minutes .... otherwise it just makes the game slow to a crawl or forces me to add in hints which destroy the atmosphere.
After the worst performance ever on ...
Thanks for reading. :-)
i'm really glad that i read this through and the responses. i am thinking of opening an adventure module in a similar fashion. the party currently is on a lawful quest to kill poachers in the name of the law, but the PCs are all evil or UA. they are pretty fun to play with, but i'm certain that they will piss off their current patron or grow disinterested with quests to do good and lawful good things.
so that thought was that in order to gain the trust of the local mafia and gain a new patron, they might get snatched and imprisoned for a time and only get to talk to the possible future patron a few times. however, what happens if he doesn't like them, he'd have to kill them then. that is certainly no fun for them, nor i.
so, after reading your post. i'm going to have to be much more careful in my plan. i am certain to skip the imprisonment entirely. obviously, it would not be fun and the PCs and players would tire of an endless game of not escaping.
Alots been said about this already. I have only 2 suggestions...
- OPTIONS
commit ritual suicide.
I believe that it is the Complete Champion that has the Summon Holy Symbol spell.
It is a 0th level spell and should give you more options.
the create food holy symbol: create a holy symbol out a soft wood that somehow is edible and very nutritious. Use this to stone shape a more durable symbol from the wall, and than eat the edible one to revitalize yourself as prisons tend to starve you. What you do next is up to you: you have your magic back
I would either say "I wait until something happens". That would be if your inclined to trust that your dm has something in mind.
If your put out that all your ideas are for naught and most of the game session has been eaten up with you trying different things only to be countered by a coincidental perfect counter I'd try something like "I'm tired of coming up with ways to try and get out of this jail only to have it thwarted by a perect counter. I'm not going to spend the whole game in a catch 22. Either this game is going somewhere or we're ending the game.
Bring your ipod/laptop/psp etc and then when the game starts, inform your DM that you will just be waiting for his deus ex machina and he should let you know when he's ready to do something. Turn on your electronic device, and wait. This should get a conversation rolling about the quality of his game rather quickly.
I'd try the Summon Holy-Symbol spell mentioned earlier. If that doesn't work, give up and start counting the stones in your cell. When the DM tries to goad you into a reaction, don't. Simply accept your fate.
This guy obviously has a god complex and is not interested in story at all.
As a DM I'd kill for creative players such as yourself. Weaving a holy symbol from straw....that was fantastic!!!
If you have no straw you could craft one from your own feces. Not only is it the ultimate in resoucefulness, I can promise you the DM will never back you into a corner again.
i'm really glad that i read this through and the responses. i am thinking of opening an adventure module in a similar fashion. the party currently is on a lawful quest to kill poachers in the name of the law, but the PCs are all evil or UA. they are pretty fun to play with, but i'm certain that they will piss off their current patron or grow disinterested with quests to do good and lawful good things.[snip]
In this case, I would plan out how the game will go if they do succeed in breaking out and if they don't. So they can try, but there doesn't have to be dice fudging to prevent or ensure that it happens.
Also consider not using an extremely powerful crime boss, but an influential one. Maybe one that has a few useful contacts and the ear of a noble, but no actual muscle. He could make life difficult for the PCs, but really only by using the noble and laws. And the patron type person would like a group of adventurers that he can ditch fast and deny working with if things go sour.
A bit tangenty, I know, but for the OP, I agree with whoever said just say that the PC waits until something happens. But only if you have a back up character that doesn't rely on a spell book which can be taken away.
Bring your ipod/laptop/psp etc and then when the game starts, inform your DM that you will just be waiting for his deus ex machina and he should let you know when he's ready to do something. Turn on your electronic device, and wait. This should get a conversation rolling about the quality of his game rather quickly.
This, as sad as it sounds, is probably the best solution. It's a bit passive aggressive, but it gets the point across.
Heck, I've put PCs in a jail before, but they don't stay there for long as immediately something happens. Personally, I don't care for jailbreak scenarios. I'd rather see a villain's plot gone wrong than wait for the PCs to figure out how to escape.
Draw a picture of the lighthouse at Cabra and stare at it until you can transport yourself through it.
AMBER!!! Thanks for the reference Entropy_Judge, made me smile.
The DM, however would probably say that Trump magic is blocked by, I dunno, a mage spending all of his time actively blocking teleport effects. It sounds like the paladin's foes have those kinds of resources available to them. OTOH, I don't see why they don't just chain the paladin to a wall, if all escape routes are truly blocked. Might as well make it obvious for the players...
I agree that waiting is probably the best course of action. If you cannot escape there is no point in trying beyond what you already have.
You need to stop looking for in-game solutions. Level with your DM out of character, find out why s/he is doing this. Tell them you'd like it to stop or you'll leave.