Post/Author/DateTime	Post
#1 FearTheLiving Nov 17, 2013 21:32:09	So my question is how do you handel knowing about bad players who join other games? Do you warn the DM and in extension the other players or do you just stay out of it.   Example: I was playing with a group online for a couple months (once a week) when out of the blue the DM disappeared, it was pretty obvious he wasn't coming back after two weeks of not showing up, not answering messages, and that he and is IRL friend also didn't show up. I didn't think anything more of it until a month later I see him looking for/joining groups on the site I met him. So are you suppose to warn players/dms of this behavior or is it best to stay out of it?   Personally I'm fine with staying out of it but part of me thinks If I was in a group with a player that is unreliable/disruptive/whatever I'd want to know before jumping into a long campaign the flip side being that the player may get along better with said group and your meddeling might have prevented said joy that would have partook.   So thoughts?
#2 Centauri Nov 17, 2013 22:10:04	There are some people I won't play with. If they join a game, I bow out and inform the GM of the reason, so that the GM doesn't take it personally.   If the behavior is disruptive in the sense of leaving people hanging, then it's just good practice to make sure the game you're joining has a way of dealing with that, especially since people can leave for real-life reasons too. I would approach this case from that direction. No need to point fingers, just take precautions to help make the game more robust.
#3 FearTheLiving Nov 17, 2013 22:52:38	Centauri wrote:
#4 Centauri Nov 18, 2013 0:19:10	No. If you're not involved in the group, not only are not not obligated to do anything, it's not any of your business. There's really no way for any reasonable other person to see such an action as anything other than malicious meddling, no matter how good your intentions.
#5 FearTheLiving Nov 18, 2013 7:44:10	Centauri wrote:
#6 Centauri Nov 18, 2013 11:36:29	FearTheLiving wrote:
#7 Krusk Nov 18, 2013 15:40:31	Its an online game? Not really. Who knows why he bailed on your game. Could be any one of tons of valid reasons.    If its an in person, I'd appreciate a little heads up as a DM. Just a "Hey I played with him before, and he disappeared 4 sessions in with no warning." I might not do anything further about it, but if I'm already on the fence, I might pull the plug at the start.   I also only play with people I know, or friends of friends though. So this isn't often an issue for me.
#8 FearTheLiving Nov 18, 2013 16:13:47	Krusk wrote:
#9 Thisishowitends Dec 01, 2013 1:20:27	This brings to mind a story. I used to run large groups, sometimes as much as 12 people. In one group I had, I let in a new male player I had ran into at a hobby shop and had a good discussion with. During the game, I noticed some telltale signs of extreme Munchkinism and Rules Lawyerism from him. As the night went on, I noticed some uncomfortable looks from one of the female players going back and forth between me and the new player. It wasn't long before he started making some pretty overt advances on one of the other female players, but only when he had the attention of the first girl that I mentioned. Long and short of it, I didn't find out until later that this new player was actually the psycho ex-boyfriend of one of the female players.   And by psycho ex-boyfriend, I mean actually megalomaniacal and anti-social, a genuinely predatory creep, and I had no idea about any of this until we got about halfway through the session, which was about when I started thinking something was up, noticing the weirdness. So I asked the female player giving me the uncomfortable looks, got her story, went to the new player, asked him about it, and when I actually talked to him, sparing details, I discovered what a true creep he was. So I kicked him out. Asap. He laughed, telling me I would regret my decision. I never saw him again.   Why am I sharing this story? Two reasons; this is when I learned I should consult with my players before bringing new people in, and it would have been kind of nice to know I was talking to a nutjob before I let him almost ruin my gaming group. I would like to think that if someone knew this guy, they would have warned me what I was getting into, not necessarily out of duty or obligation, but of kindness, and the hope that they might be able to spare another person an undeserved bit of suffering and death threats.
#10 Detoxifier Dec 16, 2013 17:07:15	I agree with most of the vibe on here.  Not only are you not obligated to inform them, you actually should refrain from doing so.  No real harm can come from him messing up a few games aside from a few hours of wasted time, and if he is actually bad about it, he will develop a reputation that will follow him.  On the other hand, I believe in second chances, and having every bad thing you ever do follow you around isn't any fun for anyone, especially if someone does try to make improvements.   Lastly, you may not know why he left, and it could be a valid reason.
#11 Nirafelos Dec 20, 2013 15:21:51	Semi-relatedly, there's an individual that applies to literally every single 4e PbP game on the giantitp forums but never, ever actually posts once games have started.   I have to imagine that by now most of the regular players and DMs just ignore his applications and accept other people instead, but I always wonder if I should tip off new DMs that accept his characters that they're going to be short a defender once the game begins.